#Plus try and catch up more
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I've been spending a lot of time applying for jobs this week, so even though I'm very much late to the weekend, but regardless, since I spent all of the previous week job hunting, I'm going to spend this coming week writing, which will probably be my routine. I think I'll pace myself and do replies one per blog for the new few hours tonight.
I also want to be around for the week leading up to Christmas so I can dash comm, and partake in a few holiday-themed things. (Probably nothing long since I don't want to throw too much on my plate that I can handle )
#TʜᴇBʟᴜᴇʙᴇʀʀɪᴇsAʀᴇMɪssɪɴɢ ( OOC )#Mᴀss Dᴇsᴛʀᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ( T�� Bᴇ Dᴇʟᴇᴛᴇᴅ )#Job hunting is more energy draining than people think#Especially when the job market is tough rn#But I wanna be here for the week before xmas#Plus try and catch up more#If its possible#Hope everyone else has been doing well though#We been blasted by snow and arctic cold#Canada doing its thing p much lol
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MAKEOUT BESTIES ok that is my new term for any relationship I (an aromantic) have in the future I've decided. We aren't dating we're makeout besties it's different
#trying to catch up on pnat again#the new mostly text based format is definitely harder for me yo stay focused on cus reading.. hard...#but its still very food and i know zach needed to take it easy for their wrist and i totally get that#plus its a way more efficient story telling method like the story is definitely moving a lot faster than before which i wotn complain about#just means ill get to see my kids in modern day (for them) again sooner#hope i get to see johnny again soonish i miss my dumb fucking son#again im not sure if ill be actively using this account like regularly again but ill at least use it for my reactions and stuff lol
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I'm gonna just post Twitter updates for the time being... I'm still a little burnt out on posting updates but I don't want to completely get out of the habit and Twitter updates are usually the easiest to post
#instagram updates are usually a bit more interesting/people tend to interact with them more#but theyre honestly such a pain bc u cant download stuff directly#plus honestly a lot of their ig posts lately have been various brand deals which i honestly dont care about#and it may sound silly but it gets a bit depressing for me to have to keep posting it#not saying theres anything wrong with it#its just one of those aspects of the fandom im not as interested in#and when that's like.. the main thing im interacting with via updates it does not feel fun#i want to try and catch up with chinalines variety shows theyve been doing recently#so i might livepost some reactions/funny things while im watching bc i think that will be more fun#i definitely haven't lost interest in svt im super pumped to see them in concert agin even if jun wont be there :')#i just think i need to take a step back and reevaluate how im interacting with the fandom so its a bit more fun#and feels like less of a chore#thank you for being patient with me!#melia.txt
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I love it when I'm not actually as invested in something as others are yet I'll still spend. 10+ hours just watching content about it cuz I still have to know about it like I might not have brain rot or anything but I gotta have that info in my brain
#I mean in general it takes a lot to really catch my attention#like I like lots and lots of media#constantly looking around for new stuff to invest my time in#and when I find smth I will go over it a lot if it's cool enough#but like to ACTUALLY hook me with literal brain worms it has to be SOO specific#in a way idk how to even really explain#like the list of things that'll hook me almost INSTANTLY if I start looking @ them again is like#WoY. NoN. i.i. and uhhh Dano :] if u read this far that mod is in my pinned ^^#I really like the mod a LOT and got them brain rotting worms in my head for em#atm I'm trying to branch out and keep up with new media. catch up or rewatch old media etc etc#so it's distracting me from any specific brain rot atm cuz I'm so all over the place but yeah!#Indigo Park is cool :] I do really like Rambley a lot but I'll have to see more if him and more of the game in the future#before it really makes anything in my brain I think#OH Secret Squirrel is a new one that's really got me but I'm staying away from that FREAK bcuz I'm not normal abt him#plus there's only like 13 episodes but tbf I'VE WORKED WITH LESS#I'm like the master of getting invested in the most obscure shit possible man
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My brain feels like it's been in a complete fog for like 6 months but I'm trying my best. That and the resurgence of nerve pain and NEW pain in my spine has been great I love bodies.
#trying to catch up on basic human things but it's like#every time i start to get anywhere#things set me back or i have another crisis that drains me mentally and physically#I've been wanting this wheelchair and i can't get it even tho it's literally like 1k off the usual 4k price#bc i just had to buy a car and spend my savings and more on fixing my old car#plus I'm not getting hired and don't have energy for auditions which is#great#I'm tired and i feel like giving up#but oh no now i have to finish maybe buying a house and dealing with family and moving#so that's fun#anyway if I'm quiet that's why I've been so isolated#the house isn't my own money obv but it's bc my grandma sold my late dad's place so she wanted me to have a place#that's the only way we're getting houses gang#i don't wanna be ungrateful it's very exciting it's just a lot and I have to be put together about if
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catching up with missed journal entries from months ago using random shit we wrote down at the time plus stuff from our search history and tumblr posts and stuff, and we got to an entry for a day that was apparently so stressful we started shaking and getting a migraine before we'd even started writing it so that's something
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#I have to write this stuff out in one place specifically so we can check back more easily to see when things happened#otherwise everything becomes a confusing mess where we can't put events in order properly#and we have barely kept on top of journaling since like the start of February so you can imagine how things have been going for us#luckily if anything especially significant happened we'll often have written it down somewhere#or might be able to remember the rough date for it or something like that#and for less significant stuff we can often figure it out from other stuff#but having it all in one place is a lot better than having to try and figure it out based on random clues when we need to know what happene#plus the app we use for journaling is a mood tracker and we wanted to actually track how activities affect our moods#technically I could just decide not to catch up with it other than a few especially significant entries#but then we'd have more and more trouble remembering what happened during the rest of all that#and I would actually like to remember anything from the last 4 months
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You know, I've held for a long time the belief that canon!Denise eventually surpasses Sylvia and is just a notch above her in terms of battle prowess despite being younger. But the more I think about it the more I realize Paldea!Denise blows Sylvia out of the WATER with how strong she is to the point it's not even a contest
#mel's musings#forest for the tree#little songbird#first of all. dena started 3 years younger in this au. she got her sprigatito at 15 whilst syl got oshawott at 18#she's got FIVE rivals as opposed to syl's three. one of whom has a reputation for being a battle maniac#(honestly. nemona alone does wonders for dena's growth as a trainer but I'VE STILL GOT MORE)#dena literally has battle studies on her academic record and has studied at two different schools for it#she's fluent in both singles and doubles strategies and beaten elite and champion ranked trainers in both playstyles#plus she's got 4 legendaries AND access to terastallization. syl would get WASHED#to be fair to her though. she certainly would not go down without a fight#she's got 2 legendaries herself plus a mega gardevoir she can communicate telepathically with#and she's significantly more adaptable than dena when her strategies don't go as planned. whereas dena tends to get boxed in her mind a bit#meaning if she manages to catch her off guard it's even possible she could pull a win from her in some circumstances#but after she spent so long wearing herself into the dirt gaining the strength she needed to beat team plasma#and trying her best to live up to everyone's expectations for her as the hero of truth (to say NOTHING of her expectations for herself)?#she's just not the grinding type anymore. she's simply content to live out her life with her beloved pokemon#and if she gets stronger as a side effect of that then cool! but it's not her main focus and she wants to keep it that way#paldea!denise was never forced into getting stronger the way syl was. and she's less beholden to others' expectations in general#and having that agency means her natural inclination to gain knowledge and grow isn't stunted by feeling like it's her only option#so she doesn't have the same reservations about striving for strength as her cousin. but that's not to say she's inherently better for it#point is. both girls had different circumstances behind how they got to where they are and the struggles they faced along the way#but regardless of that they're both content with where they ended up. they're living their best lives and that's what matters#sobs. they're so everything ;_;
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the things my mind will do to NOT have to face the consequences of a traumatic story arc
"oh so and so died last week? and the new episode is tonight? hmm sounds like it'll be a good one...
.....y'know i've really been meaning to get into [absolute rabbit hole of a fandom]"
#it just feels like today should be a break week day#like my guy just passed LAST thursday and you want me to come back? for MORE? of what? that??#yeah no i need another week to mentally prepare and then ill be right with you please and thank you#i never actually watch the rebroadcast in the mornings cuz it feels weird watching cr with the sun shining#but the thought of locking in for 4 more hours of stress tonight is not for me#so maybe ill catch it on yt and watch while i play sdv or something#yknow balance out the stress with a game that is deceptively stressful but in a different way lmao#plus i still havent finished the fhjy episode so. im busy lol#the fandom that my brain is trying to use as an excuse to miss the live btw is naddpod#ive been keeping up with dnd court cuz its just fun sillies that require none of my attention or brain power#so i havent gotten into a campaign yet but i think about it a lot. i know ill like it and thatll be the end of me#but anyway good luck tonight critters!#the temptation might have me idly popping into stream but heres to hoping no one else perishes! :'D#critical role#sea rambles
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* psa / height of magic.
i'm probably going to update my rules in terms of how combat if any, granted how lazy and uninterested fri.eren is in battle, are conducted and what i myself, as a mun will allow granted i write a very, very overpowered muse. this doesn't equate to 'unkillable / undefeatable ' but i frankly see interactions with people who pursue her line of the ' height / apex of magic ' as fern calls fri.eren's prowess just doing a dungeon, who still to this current updates in the manga , has not revealed her full hand which.. is absolutely terrifying, more of a teacher.
in most cases granted fri.eren's absurdly huge mana pool, which is quoted to be almost the same amount as serie's, who fri.eren isn't even half her age, or less!, her 1000+ years of knowledge and experience, i think it's important how well the fight between fern against her clone and ultimately frier.en facing her own replica demonstrates that experience > most anything else. you can be a prodigy like fern and there will still be a gap. you can have incredible imagination like ubel , but with sheer numbers, still be overwhelmed like the replicas overpowering her and denken in 'attrition'.
it isn't just ' fri.eren' is the main character . this is a character that 9/10 i think of my interactions has likely lived longer than most muses she'll meet, if not, cool! but those 1000+ years of experience, magic, instinct, mana pool, and battle strategy, the woman has killed the most demons in history including the demon king, kind of cement that despite the 'cute elf falls into a mimic for fun' is really the last person you'd want to test. thankfully, i think it's more in character for fri.eren unless it's a crisis, to be a teacher, something she excels at with fern, who only would have gotten that far with her own prowess and efforts as her own brand of prodigous young mage, and also having spent time actually /studying/ fri.eren over time journeying with her and knowing her personally. it's not something you'd come with naturally, and even THEN the 1000+ years vs her what, 16? time makes a huge difference. but she still is someone fri.eren is highly looking forward to watching succeed, and it shows how incredible a teacher she is even for brief periods of time, like with lawine and kanne.
this doesn't mean fri.eren is invulnerable. but granted as a manga-reader too , we still haven't seen her go all out, which, i'm not sure if we will or not ? granted her lazy nature and dislike of fighting 'strong opponents' even if frankly, she is the strong opponent, frightfully so, i'll be picky with any fight / combative threads against her, as again, i write an immensely overpowered character and i'm not going to bend canon or my muse to have her magically 'lose' for no reason even if MY muse could genuinely care less about battles, and madhouse really hammers that home when i think we as an audience almost are lulled into this sense of security with fri.eren as a character with her laziness, her sloth like nature, her bouts of silliness with mimics and her tenderness with fern, awkward as it may be, until it really slaps you in the face be it the anime or the manga. this is someone you would not want to fight by choice.
i just love the heavy emphasis of years / mana pool vs variety of magic, and how years of experience, impossible levels of years that go on and on for, well, ever, basically, are still 9/10 going to crush the opposition. but still the era of humans is coming and fri.eren looks forward to it immensely. as the humans learn, one of the last living elves, will learn too, for fun though like let her nap okay?
i'm just really happy with this episode. if your muse ever wants a part-time teacher though, frie.ren will be happy to oblige. her main focus is her apprentice and familial figure, fern, who will certainly rise to great heights in the era of humans, but if you ever need someone who likely will catch onto your methods / be an impartial teacher who actually ironically is amazing at teaching . . . fri.eren is your woman.
#𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐘. | the one one hundredth.#𝐎𝐎𝐂. | all the time in the world.#𝐏𝐒𝐀. | now is all there is.#i cannot tell you how insane this episode was done i am so happy with it! proud of fern!#proud of fern and how fri.eren had so much faith in her :' ) the mom/daughter/grandmother/grandaughter duo...#also love how the a.nime just like the ma.nga is like 'oh was fri.eren being too silly let's remind y.ou why she killed the demon king.'#i try to avoid most combative threads when i write someone this op because...yeah it's kind of frustrating.#plus it's not really ic imho for fri.eren to take someone on out of CHOICE. she really is lazy LMAO....#but if you want a teacher who will...yeah outlive you and has more experience than most can catch up with to your benefit#then she will happily share because as frie.ren says#'magic should be free.'
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I was tagged by @confidentandgood, @direwombat, @hoesephseed, @marivenah, and @roofgeese ages ago for this picrew. Thank you all for tagging me! it's been so long, i'm sure everyone's sick of seeing these, lol, so i won't tag anyone else.
Micah Hale | FC5 - when she's Jacob's captive and undergoing the trials
Micah Hale | FC5 - much later, safe and happy with John, wearing his jacket
Lilith Mallory | FC5 - chaos gremlin out to ruin someone's day
Lore Jameson | TOW - tired captain just wants a break but there's no such thing in Halcyon
#tag game#picrew#thank you all so much for including me <3#my ocs#micah hale#lilith mallory#lore jameson#i was going to do more of my ocs#but these took me three hours#i've run out of steam#plus i'm sure everyone's sick of these#anyway trying to catch up again!#forgive the spamming
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GIVE US A KITTEN UPDATE PLS TT
i kept it :)
ik i said i was going to find a good home for her (it’s her for now bc i think it’s a girl but we don’t know yet until we take her to the vet 🥹) but after not finding anyone that wanted her plus arguing with some ppl and family members over it (i’ll rant in the tags about it) i decided to try my best and give her that home myself even though ive never had cats, only dogs my whole life and don’t know the first thing of dealing with cats so it’s gonna be an interesting journey lol
thankfully my dog is obsessed with her and she also warmed up to him quickly so now they spend day and night playing, i have an old play cushion from when my corgi had her babies so they play on it all the time bc if i leave them on the couch for too long they scratch it 😭
vid of them playing under the cut 💗
#kai.answers#user-anon#ill try and be quick with the rant but long story short#i offered it to a couple of ppl and no one wanted the responsibility which i totally understand since it’s a baby so i needs more attention#and i offered it to some family members that i thought would be good bc they’ve had/have cats#plus their dogs grew up with cats so it wouldn’t be a big hassle#but they disagreed and had the audacity to tell me to throw it back where i got it and that pissed me off#bc this kitty was literally thrown out a car window on a rainy evening and was starving for like 2 days until i could catch it#plus it probably was ripped from its mother considering how small it is#and you’re gonna tell me to throw it back out?!?#and some neighbors told me to do the same so i was fuming even more bc how can you be so fkn heartless#sooo i decided to try my best and keep it and ive gone crazy buying everything i could think of to make her comfortable :)#so yeah expect more kitty updates and me randomly asking for kitty parents advice 😅
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Huh, what does this auto-thumbnail remind me of-
Oh
#Lol#Shitpost#Seems appropriate considering the subject of that speed draw lol#Getting so close to the end of editing!#There's only about another month of Requestobers left as well so keep an eye out#I've been pulling a lot more video game tracks lately - this one included - it's been enjoyable listening and relistening to some OSTs#It's been really making me want to try editing to the beat but WMM isn't really made for that kind of close-cut editing#Plus Lightworks only goes up to 720p which like - cheap >:| - but I'd also need to get used to it and I'd rather finish these out#Some consistency~~~ I can always make more later#My poor tablet's been Super on the fritz lately tho :(#I haven't played with my Gaomon since the move just trying to keep to the Comfort Items but eh#I can't tell if it's the wiggly port in the tablet or the laptop lol but I'm sure those don't help#I also Actually had a thing happen that I'd only heard horror stories about! :0 Stylus nib gouging the tablet face!#Feels almost exactly like when the graphite catches but y'know - way worse#Luckily I've got plenty of nibs but I do have a few new scratches#My intuos is celebrating a decade of use this year so honestly it's been such a champ <3#Hopefully I'll be able to ask a local repair shop the parameters on how small and specialized they can help with#Anyway lol#Vargas
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Novel and manga haul from yesterday
#prince's talk tag#i have been to 5 bookstores at this point and none of them have vol 6-8 of bloom into you#they had the sayaka light novel but im holding off on getting it until i finish the series#i was happy they had the last two volumes of witch hat i needed before catching up#also the light novels for sasaki plus the hirano novel which chronologically happened first#if im to believe the confusing timeline in the back of one of the volumes of one of these series#confusing bc of how the page was laid out i should say. the info was all over the place and a pain to read#but yea anyway#i was able to get two volumes of that phantom tales series ive become interested in. love how the owner is posed in the covers#im excited to know what happens its so cool#also happy i got the second volume of cupcake. im a sucker for office romance and i thought this one was cute#the one in the bottom right corner i saw it in another bookstore last time i went out but held off on getting it bc idk how long it is#but this time i decided to cave in and get it bc i was really curious about it#also interested in the fourth book on the top row i love the tension#ive noticed that i own a bunch of one shot yaoi books (like the fifth book in the top row) but not enough yuri one shots#so i changed that by getting the two in the bottom left area#i do want more but i dont see as much one shot yuri books in stores as i do yaoi#and now the main two in the bottom center#guardian was one i saw in a post on here from someone i follow and i liked the cover a lot so i wanted to try it out#its gonna have at least two volumes according to online#and then theres grandmaster. ive been wanting to get into this series along with the other two i see a bunch of on here#and my friend was telling me how much they love it#AND someone on here explained how i should get into it bc ive expressed interest before#but i decided to get the book now so i have it when i decide to get started#its a lot of books but bnn was having double day for all members so it felt like it was kinda worth it#(probably not but eeh)#im not a paying member i just have the basic free membership#if i got a taste of the benefits of being a paid member itll be hard to cancel when i need to so im not doing it
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so ready for af to be over i literally cannot wait to just draw whatever i want again
#this. sounds super negative hdjsjf sorry i'm not trying to make it out like that#but the af burn out is finally catching up with me unfortunately#got a few more wips to finish tho and that'll be it for me!! hoping to push out 3 more attacks before the end of the month#and then i can go back to my silly little hlm thoughts <3 and barbie too now ig lol#plus bf time next friday hehe <3333333#the trash speaks
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Bro seeing your pmd posts make me want to replay the games and hyperfixate on those mons again too...
DO IT ‼️‼️‼️‼️
#asks#i'm trying to force my pmd hyperfix back because it's genuinely like home to me#my zelda hyperfix was kinda stressful in certain aspects (kissing my fellow revali fans though) so this is a lot more peaceful for me#plus most of my immediate mutual circle are insane about it too and we all relatively feel the same about everything to a degree#anyway if you do i hope you have fun!!! forcing my hyperfix seems to be working as ive been trying to catch up on artfight all day but all i#can think about is getting back to rtdx#anonymous
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now if i go insane i need you to forgive me for it
#inside out voice: a new emotiooon !!!! 😀🤕#its nothing honestly i just wanna talk more#and i have this weird ... sanctity thing going on#about not wanting to overburden a blog ive been careful with with posts#but i made this blog so i could go post more freely !!!#and be less strict with myself#its why i sometimes dont answer things... bc i want to answer RIGHT#and i have to stop thinking you guys / people will hate me if my response isnt perfect#plus mommy h*rny michael.#LMAO#wanna know a secret.....#i finally got a sex toy up my cooch and org*smed ... it was incredible i immediately bought a real d*ldo#and guess what#IT DIDNT FIT#but im still gonna try bc that nut was insane#it reminds me of how [redacted memory]#im not ready to share that one yet lol its not bad it just silly#anyway#im hoping as soon as my life gets a little more... stable i can catch up here#and im gonna start trying... nOW#hi.#caitie blabs
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