#NPD mothers

[honeypleasejustkillme]

the realization that i will never stop being the little kid that begs my mom to acknowledge how hard im trying… fuck i hate her so much.

[gods-saunter-vaguely-downwards]

my anger has consumed me, it has made me horribly bitter. Which means I am every bit as bad as my mother.

[roomwithavoid]

the haters aren’t gonna like this one but i’m right!

[empath-abuse-awareness]

Narcissists are so beautiful and handsome and wonderful, they deserve to be proud for all that they have survived especially with such a distressing disorder

[sillynarcissist]

I wish I could kill people who were boring or slightly irritating to me

[denkilightning]

this is one of the most important moments showcasing jay's character and i stand by that.

jay, who didnt really care about garmadon changing the past so kai wouldnt become a ninja and so further destiny could not be fullfilled, the one who reached his true potential because of this girl, his favourite person, who almost beat up his best friend over a poor choice of words, who said "who cares about ninjago" in the face of leaving her behind...

on his own, willingly, while the others were still fighting, started fighting nya, taking a hit with that weapon and stalling her.

just so lloyd can escape.

he will and has sacrificed himself, his love and obsession with nya, something that in his mind probably is such a huge part of who he is. for lloyd. because thats his kid that hes sworn to protect and hes ready and willing to lay his life down for him.

[forkaround]

As someone diagnosed with psychosis I understand when folks with NPD don't want to be associated with Narcissistic Abuse. But I don't think it's accurate to say that the abuse doesn't exist. We don't have the vocabulary to separate them like we don't with psychosis/ psychotic/ psychopath/ potential serial killer. But it doesn't negate the abuse people have suffered at the hands of psychotic or narcissistic people who don't want to accept their diagnosis or don't want to change their ways to cause less harm. (Let me be clear I'm not talking about changing as a person but we can all learn to lessen harm, psychotic, npd or able-bodied.) Removing language that helps explain trauma isn't the way to go.

[remusbuzzcutt]

it’d take a lot to pry sunkiller/jarty away from my hands. they both struggled similarly but dealt with it in such different ways. my friend juli wrote about them in a group therapy setting and i absolutely fixated on it for months for some reason??

imagine barty with bpd AND npd. he used people’s emotions like it was second nature. he didn’t even think twice. with that being said, he had an avoidant attachment style. if he was showing raw emotion, it was probably for show. he wasn’t “vulnerable” without the intention to be.

imagine james with bpd, who fixated on people so much that it was all he could thing about. he was obsessive to an almost concerning degree, but that’s what barty wanted.

he wanted to be on james’s mind like that, to consume his every thought. he got off on the idea of someone thinking about him like that. barty noticed the little details, all the things that james liked so that he could use it to make james think he actually cared. it got to a point where barty was trying so hard to get james obsessed with him, he didn’t realise that the only thing he could think about was james. his mood depended on how james reacted to him, how james acted and even the tone he spoke in.

[lycoryspreachin]

barty is a narcissist. is it surprising? prehaps not, but what it is is very telling of his behaviour and upbringing.

narcissistic personality disorder is of course a difficult thing to describe or analyse over such short and relatively lighthearted writing but i will attempt my best.

barty's character takes various forms of materialisation in my mind and subconscious, however, there are specific traits i never fail to assign him. he is insecure, with no sense of self, has dramatic delusions of grandiosity and out of all the people who viscerally hate him he does the most. if we consider this hypothesis, we are swiftly presented with the scaffolding of what we can imagine barty's childhood to have been. we can easily paint in our minds the crouch's family situation. in the center of the canvas is an unattentive man, careless for nothing but his own grand ambitions. on his right, is a sick but beautiful woman, who heart only beat for barty's own, whose life has been sold and whose future holds only despair. her present, however, lies between her frail and pale hands, her only son. around the gracious trio nothing but high grey walls with cloudy and mighty windows giving out on a large and empty, dull, green land. with no stable structure on which to climb, the lonely child grabs on the unsteady and burning one, his mother. I'm fairly certain barty hates her, so much that he can only ever love her. she the poison in his veins, threatening his life and she is the very organ keeping him alive. her death was the death of his soul, he was sure of it. it left him wondering whether climbing that shaky rock to avoid the flood was worth the fall once it yeld under the stream. it was a humiliation to be alive and he would do all he could to never feel shame ever again.

younger in order to not distress and unleash his mother’s distorted bursts of emotions, he learned to observe her every move, and then everyone every move, he grew paranoid, until he couldn’t trust anyone, until he couldn’t value people anymore, except for his harem of gods of course. he had a very simplistic view of people, you were either absolute scum or absolutely divine and his view of himself often fluctuated between the former and the latter. he lies, he deceives, and he wants, he wants to be seen and heard and considered. he preys on those around him, and he will catch them because he always succeeds in everything he does.

the way he grew up greatly shaped him, or rather, his identity was never shaped due to it. he doesn't exist, he isn't anything and i would go as far as saying he views himself as dead. he devotes his life to the worship of gods he sees around. the god of knowledge, of beauty, of evil and voldemort ( maybe he saw him as the manifestation of all of the deities he followed for so long ). he had gone mad, and maybe he allowed himself to go mad, to be liberated and exist, freely, shamelessly, boundlessly. he sacrificed a life for eternity, an entire existence for a unique remembrance.

and i think within the context of his life he is somewhat dearly and betwitchingly admirable

[pain-is-my-game]

Everyday you die in my mind and just for a moment I feel at peace. But afterwards, without fail I start to panic. I have never felt freedom before. Just the thought of it is too much. I don't know who I am without you. And yet, when I'm with you I can never be free.

[incognito-melancholia]

There's a sickening feeling of familiarity, when the wrong person knows you too well ...and you know them too well... and they weren't always the wrong person!

[naofaun]

i have the kind of npd that makes me proud to be a bad guy. like, yes, tell all your friends every single sin ive ever committed, warn your family about me, might as well say i murder babies under the full moon!

[dollarstore-kins]

NPD Trans Gay Claus icons for our Mod Jason!!

-Mod ET

[salioblog]

On the Topic of Narcissistic Mothers and Self-Autonomy.

To be yourself is to commit a crime within the arms of a narcissistic mother’s house. To experiment with individuality or day to day activities is to sin under the watchful eyes of a narcissistic mother. To consider the idea of freedom regarding anything, to desire, to wish, to express, and to think are all felonies to the government made of solely a narcissistic mother.

A narcissistic mother will dictate rules to every action you commit, either mundane or vital, mother will always be in control. Mother should always be in control. To commit an action is to be her. To commit an action is to be but a copycat of her almighty image. A narcissistic mother is a tyrant, she commands, dominates, and oversees every breath.

To a narcissistic mother, you are nothing but marionette. And a marionette is silent, obedient, and soulless. If you fail to be a perfect marionette, you are but a transgressor. To dare and ruin her meticulously written marionette play is to wear a dress of immortality, a shining dress of corruption. Oh, and God forbid the existence of siblings.

Truth of the matter is, you are allowed self-autonomy by a narcissistic mother, solely to claim her own wrongdoings. She cannot taint her colourful persona black after all, she must be pristine. So, she grants you the autonomy of a trash can. Oh, yes, of course, you are allowed to exist as a dumpster when she wants to, and as a perfect image of her when she also desires. But that is about all that you are permitted to exist as. Other siblings will be angry. Other siblings will feel just like you, but if you are the scapegoat (specifically if you are the eldest), you are blamed for their anger. She did her very best raising them, but you… You are the one who corrupted them. You are the family’s cancer. If you were docile as she demands, they would have been, too. You are only granted self-autonomy when you are given the status of venom.

You are not your mother. No matter how keenly she attempts to mold you into a picture of her, as long as you resist, as long as you hold onto your own person dearly, you will never be her. Do not shatter just yet. You are destined for so much more.

-

Personal Notes.

My mother is simply not aware of the breakage she has caused in me. My mother is not aware of all the body aches this mental damage induces. My gut health is down the drain, not to mention my immune system’s function. I am physically in shambles. I am in the constant embrace of a state of fatigue. Lethal, quiet fatigue. Being me has grown extremely tiresome.

Don’t lose.

17:17 Wed Jul 31 2024

[oasisr]

I really believe that my entire family has NPD at this point. And, everyone needs therapy.

My brother borrowed my mom's car last night. This morning, our enabler mom and I went in the car to go get coffee.

I immediately noticed that the car stunk. It had a horrible smell.

I found red solo cups in the passenger seat, and mom found fast food bags in the back seat.

My brother had taken his daughters and his girlfriend to get hamburgers, but they left the half eaten food in the car all night. It started to rot and smell odorous.

I told my mom that it was not okay that he let the girls trash the car, and that they should never be drinking and driving.

Mom said it's not a big deal and we should just go get coffee.

I said, "Aren't you going to call him and tell him that it's wrong? Why don't you have him clean the car?"

She said that I'm weird for being upset and that it's none of my business because it's not my car.

Last time my brother borrowed the car, there was a bottle of vodka in the passenger seat.

He has had two DUIs, and has had his license revoked.

I don't even understand why she would want him to drive the car in the first place.

She kept telling me over and over to mind my own business, and that drinking and driving isn't a big deal because she threw the trash away.

I told her that she could have lost her car if he were to get pulled over, plus his teenaged daughters were in the car too! (He also lets his daughters drink and smoke weed. That's a whole other story.)

I admit that my anger took over and I lost it. I started yelling at my mom to listen to me, and to stop saying that it's okay for him to drink and drive, and leave garbage in the car.

She kept saying it's not a big deal. I started screaming at her. I just couldn't keep calm. I felt like she had no common sense or common decency to stand up for him.

I can't understand why no one in the family has to face any consequences. But, if I say I don't agree with something because it's morally or legally wrong, then I'm the bad person.

I've been crying and hyperventilating all day long because she just seems so lost. My entire family is lost. I don't even know what to do anymore.

[shigayokagayama]

too scared of those weird ableists who term search personality disorders to accuse random disabled people of abuse apologism to make an indepth analysis post but like is this not a slightly modified version of the speech teru gives to mob in the black vinegar arc