#Me two days ago: 'I had no migraines anymore in a while'

[technodromes]

Woke up with killer migraines. No writing today.

[nyrandrea]

No because he is as well, I adore the way he was written!! I was the same gigglin n kickin my feet each n everytime 😭

But can I ask for a request then, so say reader n Astarion ( plus two others ) are in an fight and reader just gets badly injured n knocked out and he just loses it killing anyone in his path to get to reader caring about them agshdudisowowi

Thanks so much for the request! I had quite a bit of fun writing this prompt.

Few warnings for canon-typical violence, blood, injury and animal death. Yyyyeah it is quite the doozy.

Word Count - 1.9k

Hope you enjoy!

xxx

The moon hung low in the starlit sky, its pale light casting ghostly shadows upon a narrow, winding mountain path. You and your party had been travelling all day as you wanted to cover more considerable ground to make up for time lost due to camping. However, the physical toll it was taking on everyone was starting to show as you all moved cautiously through the rugged terrain. 

Lae’zel was understandably the most resilient of the group, her tough demeanor betrayed only by the beads of sweat that trailed down her knitted eyebrows as she focused on conquering the path ahead. Shadowheart seemed to be driven purely by spite just to keep up with the githyanki; you almost had to fight her a few times just to get her to stop and catch her breath before she keeled over.  

You were feeling pretty run down yourself, every step felt heavier as time dragged on and your muscles were screaming at you to stop, but if you made it to that rock, to that tree, just over the hill, across the river, only then could you rest. 

You said that about ten rocks and five rivers ago. 

“That’s it!” A familiar voice shouted out from behind you, and you instinctively rolled your eyes. “I can’t take this anymore.” 

Turning around, you were greeted with the sorry sight of Astarion collapsing onto his knees and huffing for breath, and it seemed as if he wasn’t going to get back up anytime soon.  

“Astarion-” 

“Don’t you ‘Astarion’ me with that... little disappointed pout of yours,” the vampire said. “I am literally on my knees begging here, darling. We need to stop for the night.” 

“As sad as your little theatrics are,” Shadowheart walked over to the two of you and smirked down at him before turning to you. “He does have a point. We’ve been walking all day; I think I lost all feeling in my feet about half an hour ago.”  

“And you say he is the dramatic one?” Lae’zel cut in, sneering down at you from a higher ledge. “Look at you all, complaining like children. This is nothing compared to-” 

“Yes, yes, you have endured a horrendous array of training throughout your arduous upbringing on the Astral Plane that has transformed you into the fearsome warrior you are today; we get it,” Astarion said sarcastically, earning a snort of laughter from Shadowheart and a scowl from yourself. “But I for one am not made of pure titanium and would like to rest.” 

“Fine,” Lae’zel growled. “But if the ghaik tadpole decides to turn your insides out because of your time wasting, then I shall be all too happy to end your life.” 

“It’s a deal, darling.” 

With everyone in agreement, you relieved yourself of your heavy backpack and quickly got to work on setting up a makeshift camp. Dinner was a small, cooked rabbit to share, while Astarion waited patiently for you to finish until you let him drink his fill. You didn’t miss the concerned glance shared between Shadowheart and Lae’zel but said nothing. 

As the darkness deepened and the others retired for the evening, you decided you didn’t quite want to go to sleep quite yet— a decision you were probably going to regret come morning. Regardless, the stars were out tonight, and you weren’t certain when you might next get to enjoy them during this treacherous journey, if ever. 

The tadpole behind your eye wriggled slightly, and you were worried it was going to waste your night with a migraine and unwanted whispers, but instead it settled down. You huff a sigh of relief; you were spared, for tonight anyway. 

Despite the sky above being a sight to behold, your eyes couldn’t help but keep wandering down. Astarion was sitting across from you, his eyes creased and lips in a tight line as he concentrated on the ghastly book spread across his lap. The Necromancy of Thay had been his focus of attention for these past few nights, and you were honestly starting to worry a little for him. Sure, it was you who had given it to him in the first place (after he practically begged you for it), but the way he hyper focused on it at times was... concerning, to say the least. 

You clear your throat, hoping to catch his attention. 

It doesn’t work; you try again. 

“Oh, do shut up...!” 

His sharp tone makes you recoil slightly, and the vampire mirrors you, glancing between you and the book with widened eyes. 

“O-Oh no, I didn’t mean you, my dear. It’s this blasted book,” Astarion says, frowning down at it like a disappointed parent. “I can’t make heads or tails of the damn thing.” 

“Do you... need some help?” You meekly offer, even though you didn’t know the first thing about necromancy; some things were just best left untouched in your opinion. 

“You’re a sweetheart,” he breathes out a little chuckle. “But no.” He allows the book to close with a heavy thump before his eyes trail back up, lingering on you for a moment. “But I could do with a... little distraction.” 

As the fire crackles and pops, your cheeks flare up as Astarion slowly crawls his way around, not stopping until he is only inches away from you. Not quite knowing what to do or where to look, your body goes stiff as he slowly leans in towards you.  

“What do you think, hm?” he purrs, his knuckle softly caressing your cheekbone as he brushes away a stray lock of hair behind your ear. “Shall we have a little fun?” 

You nod shyly and allow him to draw you in as he cups your face and brushes his lips against yours, only to suddenly stiffen and pull away. A surge of panic jabs up from under your ribs as you’re worried that, somehow, you’ve done something to hurt him or put him off. 

“I-I’m sorry!” You blurt out. “Are you okay?” 

He eases your fretting by smoothing down your arms with an almost amused expression. “No, it’s not you, never you, I can’t stress that enough but there’s... something-,” he frowns and sniffs the air.  

Oh Gods, did you stink? You knew it had been a while since you last washed but… 

No, his attention was away from you as he quickly got to his feet and focused on what appeared to be a large boulder of sorts, about ten feet away from where you lay. 

Astarion’s eyes widen, and for the first time in a long time, he looks terrified. 

“Shit, he’s found me again. We’ve got to leave, now!” 

Suddenly, like vipers striking from the shadows, a group of monster hunters descended upon you, the night erupting into chaos as they sprang into action with ruthless efficiency. Swords and daggers glinted ominously in the dim firelight as you and the others desperately tried to defend yourselves. 

Fear and confusion gripped the group as you fought back against your assailants, but the element of surprise was with the ambushers. They moved with a deadly grace; their tactics honed through countless skirmishes. The clash of steel and cries of anguish pierced the night air.  

Desperation fueled your resistance, but they outnumbered you five to one, and that was without including their attack dogs, who had taken to separating you from the rest of the group as their personal prey. You jab your sword at their snapping maws, shout and try to make yourself look big to fend them off or, at the very least, make them think twice about attacking you.  

However, none of it seems to work as one takes a lunge at you and sinks their jaws into your arm. The jolt of shock quickly wore off to the searing heat of pain as the dog tugged and shook you like a rag doll, the beast spurred on by the snarls and barks of the others before they joined in on the mauling. 

You tried to scream but it hurt to even breathe, reducing you to mere gasping as your limbs throbbed and your head pounded. You thought you heard screaming, but the chaos of the battle muffled your senses as if you were being held underwater. You fall flat on your back as you’re pinned down to the ground, your eyes fluttering as something hot, wet and slimy drips onto your cheeks. Your eyes are met with a row of fangs; you shut them quickly, unwilling to look your death in the face. 

In that moment, an anguished cry cuts through the noise, and your eyes snap open. 

The next few moments are a blurry, bloody mess; primal and violent as you can just make out different voices—the hunter’s voices— crying out in pain along with the sound of wet tearing, of fangs ripping into flesh and blood splattering across the ground. You can only stare ahead, eyes wide with fear and body numb as the heavy weight on your chest is suddenly lifted. There’s a pitiful whine and a crunching snap, and the carnage finally stops. 

After a few moments of unbearable silence, your jumbled thoughts immediately go to your teammates, and you try to push yourself up to go help them. They were probably hurt, or worse, dead. You had to get up. Just... get up! 

‘Get up!’ 

“Get up goddamn you!” 

Your blurred vision slowly cleared as you blinked away your tears, and a familiar, blood-splattered face came into view. Gods but Astarion looked so afraid; his red eyes were wet, and his bottom lip quivered ever so slightly as he gently slid his hands under your broken body to help you sit up. 

“Oh, thank the Gods,” he whispered. “He... he will not take you away from me. I won’t let him.” He looks over his shoulder and shouts, “Cleric, get over here now!” 

His lips curled into a snarl as Shadowheart dropped to her knees beside you, as if he was frustrated that she wasn’t healing you quick enough. As if to confirm, he snaps at her to hurry up. 

“Shouting at me isn’t going to make the process go any quicker, I need to concentrate,” Shadowheart bit back, before her gaze softened upon you as a golden light washed out from her hands and over your body. “Just hold on a little longer, okay?” 

“She is right, you must calm yourself,” Lae’zel softly ordered Astarion as she knelt by your other side. “You have already taken your rage out on the enemy, do not let it overtake you.” 

Astarion said nothing as he focused solely on you, whispering hushed promises and honeyed words that got jumbled through your dazed state, but you appreciated them all the same. You tried to show him this by curling your stiff fingers around his, the coolness of his skin bringing a brief respite to your burning hot hands. He breathes out a sad, broken chuckle and reciprocates your gesture with a soft kiss to your fingers. 

The moon bore witness to the tragedy, casting its cold, indifferent light upon the scene, but you thought it shone beautifully, all the same. 

xxx

[ilovelovewithallmyheart]

Your clan of jujutsu sorcerors weren’t in the top three, but they weren’t far behind. They were in the top four.

In prestigious jujutsu clans, the matter of carrying the bloodline was of great importance. Your older sister, powerful, beautiful and amazingly kind was constantly getting marriage proposals left and right.

It was the night of a great banquet celebrating your older sisters 30th birthday. She was already running 40 minutes late…

Suddenly the lights dimmed and the projector started lowering itself out of nowhere. A video flashed into life-

“Hey guys. You must be wondering where I am right now. As you are watching this, I will be on a one way trip to America.”

Your older sister sat in front of the camera, confessional youtube video style.

Loud gasps resounded across the hall. You felt your stomach churn, the dinner you had earlier threatening to make a reappearance. 

“Don’t bother looking for me.”

She crossed her arms. “I decided to leave for the better. After all, It was hard on me and my wife to live so far apart from eachother.”

An outrage spread all around you. “What is the meaning of this?” Your father roared.

You had no idea when your sister got married. But go her.

“To my younger sister…goodbye and good luck.”

The video dimmed, leaving the dinner hall in darkness and utter chaos.

Good luck? What could she mean by that-

It suddenly dawned on you. 

Without your older sister, you were now the first candidate for marriage.

**

“You are seriously strange if you think for one moment that I’ll agree to marry Zenin Naoya. He literally handed me a terms and conditions folder of everything I can and can’t do if we get married!” Arguing with your father felt like arguing with a brick wall. 

“He is in line to be the next head of-“ A knock on the door stopped your father from another one of his rants. You sighed in relief. “Don’t allow in any late comers. Meeting time ended two minutes ago.” Your father ordered.

For the past six, that’s right, six hours of the day, you and your father met with suitors who were asking you for your hand in marriage. 

The guard at the door looked increasingly nauseous. “Sir-“

The door suddenly blasted open, splinters of wood flying everywhere. Your father ducked and you felt existensial dread. You knew who was behind that door.

“My dear, sorry I’m late.” Casually stepping around the carnage as if it was nothing, Gojo Satoru sauntered in with all his 6’3 might. 

You felt a migraine coming in.

Ever since the first year of highschool, Gojo Satoru had been hopelessly besotted with you. He’s asked for your hand in marriage four different times. With four. Different. Rings.

“What is this Gojo.” You stared blankly at the ROCK sitting on a thick band of gold. You and Gojo just finished up a mission together, and, covered in a curse’s guts, he dropped to one knee and brought out a ring. “You declined the last three times so I figured you wanted a bigger diamond.”

That same man was now standing around your ruined meeting room with a sheepish smile on his face. “I-I actually didn’t get you a ring this time.” He had the audacity to look shy. “I hope you forgive me…”

“You don’t need to get me a diamond abomination to propose. I’ll reject you, ring or no ring.” You replied with a lethal smile. “Why are you here Satoru.” You wanted this man out. 

“Why else would I be here? I’m asking if I can be your husband.” His face wasn’t playful anymore. He was dead serious.

You were about to reject him for the fifth time, but then your eyes landed on Naoya’s thick terms and conditions booklet, then you remembered the multitude of old, decaying men that were basically salivating while looking at you, and sighed.

“Fine.”

“YES. There’ll be donkeys and-“

“We’re having a small wedding ceremony.”

He frowned. Obviously, he had planned out the entire wedding ceremony out meticulously, donkeys and all.

“We can work on it.” 

[estrellami-1]

Quite Miss Home

Had an idea. Wrote 2.3k words in a couple of hours. Pure fluff based on the James Arthur song. ❤️

“Helloooooo, Chicago!” Eddie yells into the mic, reveling in the roar he gets back from the audience.

It’s been ten years since it all; since the end of the world as he knew it and the beginning of something so much better. Corroded Coffin had taken off quickly, after the “earthquakes;” something about rising from the ashes like a phoenix, if Eddie had to guess, but he’s not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, just enjoy what he’s given, and damn is he enjoying it.

“How are you?” He asks, grinning when the audience cheers again. “Alright, alright. Man, I’ll tell you, it’s fuckin’ awesome being here. But can I tell you a secret?” The audience roars again, and he grins as he takes his guitar off, hoisting it up. “Who’s this?”

“Sweetheart!” The crowd yells back.

“That’s right!” He quietly thanks the stagehand who darts up to grab it from him. “But it’s not my only sweetheart. In fact, my real sweetheart is at home. And this tour is so awesome, but I’m kinda starting to miss my sweetheart.”

“Aww,” the crowd says, and he grins softly at them.

“I know,” he says. “This next song is for my sweetheart. They’re at home because they get migraines, and tours aren’t very conducive to not getting migraines, so we both decided it would be better if they stayed home. So this next song isn’t Corroded Coffin’s normal sound. In fact-” he gestures at the stage behind him- “if you’ll notice, the rest of the boys aren’t up here anymore. This is an Eddie Munson original, and I want to thank them, from the bottom of my heart, for letting me be the dramatic sap I am, and letting me sing this song, on national television, for my sweetheart.” The stagehand comes up again, this time with an acoustic, and again Eddie thanks him. “So, sweetheart,” he says, facing the cameras, “this one’s for you.”

“I'm in the kitchen while you smoke outside. You're careful not to let the smoke inside. I always tell you it's poison, but I know it helps you take the edge off the day.”

Eddie knows exactly where Steve’s gonna be when he gets home from where he works part-time as a bartender. In through the front door, dropping his keys on the kitchen counter, straight through to the porch where Steve’s smoking.

“Y’know those things are poison,” he jokes, stealing it straight from Steve’s mouth and taking a drag before giving it back to him.

“I never want kids,” Steve says in answer. He’s a kindergarten teacher, so he comes home in one of two moods: he has the worst baby fever, or he never wants to see another child again.

“Yeah? What happened today?” Eddie asks, settling in close. He’s hungry, and was vaguely considering a stir fry, but instead he tucks in close as Steve takes another drag, preparing himself.

“Okay, so get this.”

“We get a drink before it's closing time, the one on High Street with the blinking sign. All these memories feel poignant. I won't be there to see the snow melt away.”

“Hey,” Eddie says, seeing someone settle at the bar in his periphery. “What can I get you?”

Then he actually turns to face the person, and-

Oh.

“Whiskey on the rocks,” Steve grins, leaning over the counter. “And maybe… something else? A little later?”

A thrill of heat rushes through Eddie, but he rolls his eyes with a grin and pushes Steve back by a palm to his forehead. “Keep it in your pants,” he admonishes, “I’m on the clock for the next four hours. Someone didn’t tell me they were gonna drop in, and I took my break twenty minutes ago.”

Steve hums. “Y’know, a dull knife could be very dangerous,” he says. “I certainly hope the one you’re using to cut limes is sharp.”

Oh.

Eddie grins, always on board, and leans over the counter. “Steve Harrington,” he purrs, delighting in the flush racing up his cheeks and down his neck. “What exactly are you insinuating?”

Steve sits there for a beat, drains his whiskey, and hops off the stool with a dangerous smirk. “Careful on your way out. It started snowing.”

“Oh, yeah, I been gone on business. I gotta make some money. I really feel the distance.”

“I’m gonna miss you,” Steve murmurs, clinging to Eddie like a koala. They’re still in bed, and Eddie doesn’t have to leave for another five hours. He’s gonna spend all the time he can in bed with Steve.

“I know, baby,” Eddie whispers back. “Tours are so long.”

“A month,” Steve agrees. “And then another three, after Indy.”

“But just think,” Eddie murmurs. “You’re still working, right? And those kids love you, and no matter what you say, I know you love them. And this tour is gonna be really good for us. We could get Wayne into a house, and help Hop with his payments-”

“He won’t accept the help.”

“No, but Joyce will,” Eddie grins. Steve laughs softly into his chest, then sighs and kisses a tattoo.

“I just wish I could be with you. I wish my head worked right.”

“Baby,” Eddie says firmly, “I love you. Regardless of if you can or can’t come with me. If you’re gonna be miserable the entire time—and we both know you would be, don’t even try to deny it—I’d be miserable, too.”

“I know,” Steve sighs.

“But hey. We’ve got time right now. And I’m not letting you move from this very spot until I’m gonna be late.”

Steve chuckles. “I’ll drag you out myself, Eds, much as I don’t want it I know you need to go.”

“I know,” Eddie says softly, turning so they’re both on their sides, facing each other. “But I don’t have to go right now. And I’m gonna spend as much time as I can right now with you.”

“I know.”

“No, baby,” Eddie says, eyes wide, “you don’t get it. I won’t even let you pee alone today.”

“So just like normal, then,” Steve grins.

Eddie squawks.

“And I quite miss home. And I miss you telling me to leave my shoes at the door 'cause you just swept the floor, and the dirt drives you crazy. Yeah, I quite miss home, 'cause it feels like poetry. When the rain falls down on the window while you're in my arms, and we're watching the TV. Yeah, I quite miss home. Yeah, I quite miss home.”

“Hey, Eds,” Steve calls as soon as Eddie steps foot inside. “Shoes off at the door, I just swept and I swear to God, if you track dirt into the house-”

Eddie chuckles, toeing his shoes off before walking further into the house. “I know, baby, it wreaks havoc on your bare feet to feel it. I get a free pass from that ‘cause I wear socks like a normal person.”

“Literally when have you ever been normal,” Steve says, “that’s not normal, you and your fuckin’ ice cube toes in the middle of the goddamn night on my calves-”

Eddie snickers. “‘S not my fault you’re a furnace, babe.”

“I will maintain that it is your fault until we can prove otherwise, actually.”

Eddie is in love with this man. “What the fuck does that mean?” He asks, laughing, wandering down the hallway and into their room, where Steve’s folding laundry. “Fuck, I love you.”

Steve grins and accepts a kiss. “I love you too.”

“I smell you cooking from the living room, and then I tell you that I love your food. I know it doesn't come easy, but you know it reminds me where I'm from.”

“Baby,” Eddie groans when he walks in. “Are you making the pork?”

“I’m trying,” Steve grumbles, frowning at the pan. “‘S not working. It’s not getting crispy like it should.”

Eddie walks closer, wrapping his arms around Steve’s waist and nuzzling the side of his head. “Looks amazing,” he murmurs. “And smells even better.”

Steve sighs. “I just wish it was easier for me.”

“You don’t have to do this, baby.”

“But I know you love it.”

“I mean, yeah. But I love anything you cook, Steve. Or anything you call in. It’s the effort, y’know? Even when you don’t have the energy for anything but calling in pizza.”

Steve smiles. “You’re a sap, y’know that?”

Eddie chuckles, kissing Steve’s neck. “Yeah, I know. I’ve been down bad for you for a while, baby.”

“Yeah?” Steve tilts his head to allow Eddie better access. “How long?”

Eddie hums, moving down Steve’s neck, worrying his collarbone. “Probably since the demobat, Big Boy.”

Steve moans as Eddie sucks a mark high on his neck, just beneath his ear. “Yeah?” He asks, high and breathy.

Eddie turns the heat off. “Yeah.” A little bite to Steve’s earlobe as his hand creeps around to the front of Steve’s jeans. “Lemme show you?”

Steve pants. “Dinner-”

“Can wait,” Eddie growls. “I want you tonight, baby.”

“Whoa, I'm in another city. I got nobody with me. And it just really hit me.”

“Hey, baby,” someone croons. Eddie thinks he recognizes her from the last stop on the tour.

“Um… hi?”

She giggles. “So coy. You don’t have to play like that with me, baby.”

Eddie narrows his eyes. “I’m not your baby.”

“Well, no,” she admits. “But you could be. Or I could be yours, if you’re more into being a Daddy.” She runs teasing fingers up Eddie’s arm.

He jerks his arm away. “Look, I’m sure you’re nice and all, but I’m really not looking-”

“Not yet you’re not,” she says.

“I don’t even know what that means- look, lady, I don’t want anything, okay?”

“Oh, come on, now-”

“I said no,” he says, harsher than he maybe should have, for the way she steps backs in shock. “Please leave,” he continues, gentler. “Or I’ll call security. And I don’t want to have to do that.”

She narrows her eyes at him. “You could’ve had a great lay.”

“I have a great lay,” he shoots back. “And I’m not willing to sacrifice it for a meaningless one-night-stand.” He sighs, runs a hand through his hair. “I’m sure you’re a great lady. But I’ve got my other half at home.”

“Your other half?” Steve interrupts over the phone, delight evident in his voice. “Christ, Eds, you’re a sap, I miss you so fuckin’ much.”

“I know, baby, I miss you too, now I was in the middle of a story.”

“That I quite miss home, and I miss you telling me to leave my shoes at the door 'cause you just swept the floor, and the dirt drives you crazy. Yeah, I quite miss home, 'cause it feels like poetry when the rain falls down on the window, while you're in my arms, and we're watching the TV.”

“Baby,” Eddie yells inside, “It’s raining lynxes and wolves!”

Steve laughs from the laundry room. “Why can’t you just say cats and dogs?”

“Because,” he stresses, “it’s not. It’s raining so hard, babe, it’s perfect couch-cuddling weather, can we watch a movie? Please?”

Steve smiles. “Dinner’s in the oven keeping warm. Labyrinth is in the player already.”

Eddie stills, staring at Steve, for a solid thirty seconds. “Fuck, I love you,” he murmurs. Steve grins and steals a kiss.

“Go get the food,” he says. “I’ll be there in just a minute, just gotta finishing moving this stuff from the washer to the dryer.”

He does, and Steve does, and soon the dirty dishes are abandoned on the coffee table and their feet are tucked up on the couch. Steve’s leaning on Eddie and Eddie’s hand is under his shirt, not for anything suggestive, simply just to feel.

He kisses Steve’s head with a content sigh, and Steve tilts his head back to look at him. “What’s up?”

“Y’know this is one of the things I miss the most when I’m touring?”

Steve smiles. “Just sitting watching a movie?”

“Well, anything with you, actually. But yeah. No expectations, just the movie, and the rain, and just. Us.”

Steve smiles and kisses his jaw. “This is one of the things I miss most when you’re on tour, too.”

“Yeah, I quite miss home. Yeah, I quite miss home. And I quite miss home. Yeah, I miss you telling me to leave my shoes at the door 'cause you just swept the floor and the dirt drives you crazy. Oh, I just miss home, no, no, 'cause it feels like poetry, as the rain falls down on the window while you're in my arms and we're watching the TV. Oh, I miss home, yeah, I quite miss home, no. Oh, I quite miss home. Yeah, yeah, I quite miss home.”

The last strum reverberates through the silent auditorium. Then, an anguished groan. “What the fuck, why are you perfect?”

Eddie laughs along with the rest of the crowd. “That’s quite the compliment, but no, my sweetheart will be the first to tell you I’m anything but perfect.”

Three and a half weeks later, Steve slams into him as he’s walking into the house. “Oh,” he says, delighted. “Hi, baby.”

“Fuck you,” Steve says, “fuck you and your song, I swear to God, Eds-” he tugs on Eddie’s shirt, pulling him away from the door, and Eddie chuckles.

“Baby, my shoes, the floors-”

“Fuck your shoes,” Steve growls. “Fuck the floors. If I’m not naked in bed in the next thirty seconds-”

Eddie grins and picks him up. “Say no more,” he murmurs into Steve’s ear, taking purposeful strides toward the bedroom.

As he kicks the door shut, he has one thought: This is my favorite part of coming home.

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @mischivarien @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @inadequatecowboy @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

Also tagging @finntheehumaneater and @gloomysoup because I figure you might like it ❤️

[bensonoliviasstuff]

“Turning Page”

Chapter two! “ Loml”

Masterlist for “Turning Page”

Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary: Once Bucky regained consciousness and was no longer the Winter Soldier, all he missed from the 40s was his wife. But maybe she's closer than he thought.

Warnings: English is NOT my first language, so I'm sorry if there are too many errors. Futhermore i don't think there are many warnings, a little bit of angst, memory loss, betrayal, trauma, Insecurities and other things that you will discover throughout the story. And the best part: Thanos doesn't exist here

“Steve?” You said with a mixture of shock and joy. “Long time no see!”

Bucky frowned as he saw Steve smile at the beautiful nurse before them.

“I thought you were still in Washington” Steve flinched when you gave him a hug, squeezing the bruise that threatened to form on his rib.

“Did you get into another fight?” You said observing the dried blood on his cheekbone “Some things never change”

As you turned to grab the material you would use to clean Steve's face, Bucky discreetly elbowed his best friend before whispering. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your pretty friend?”

Steve rolled his eyes before you turned your attention back to him. “Y/N, this is Bucky, Bucky Barnes, I already told you about him” Steve pointed to his smiling friend next to him “Bucky, this is Y/N Y/L/N, my friend and ex neighbor since we were 16 .”

You looked up at Bucky and it seemed to him that things went in slow motion when you smiled, he almost didn't hear you when you said “Nice to meet you”.

He gave a slight shake of his head to regain consciousness and turned to Steve. “If you've been friends for so long, why have I never met this beautiful girl?” You gave a sheepish smile as you bandaged Steve.

“First: you would flirt with her exactly like you are doing now” You laughed softly and Bucky was sure that was how angels laughed. “Second: She went to nursing school in Washington a while ago, I didn’t know she had come back until now.”

“I'm sorry I didn't warn you, I came back a little while ago and things have been busy, but we'll see each other more often from now on.” You said, taking off your gloves.

“That’s a splendid idea” Bucky said, if you had gone to college maybe Bucky should start improving his vocabulary.

You smiled at him before turning to Steve “I finished, you can go, I have to do a blood draw, but let's plan to have a milkshake, I missed you” then you turned to Bucky. “I hope to see you again, Bucky Barnes.”

“You can count on it” He winked at you before you left the room shaking your head.

“Look, we've been friends for a long time, don't even think about it” Steve pointed his finger at Bucky who was smiling with hearts in his eyes. “I'm serious, if she doesn't want to be my friend anymore because I introduced you two, I'll break you”

Steve stood up and left, Bucky behind him muttering “It’s easier for her to break me” with a smile.

After that day, it was quite funny for you to see Bucky every day in the hospital with some mysterious illness that only you could treat.

Sometimes he would arrive saying he had a really bad migraine, sometimes he would arrive with a terrible stomach ache, all this when he didn't arrive saying he had a fever only for you to put your hand on his forehead and say his temperature was normal.

Your friends from work at the hospital were already more excited than you were, always talking about how that handsome man was wooing you.

You always laughed at these crazy ideas, for you he was just a flirt who flirted with all the girls, but you had to admit that you were starting to get attached to his visits to the hospital.

One day in particular changed your view of him.

Your duty was almost over, you had already changed your clothes and grabbed your bag to leave, Bucky hadn't come to see you today.

You were sad, you spent half of the duty wondering what could have happened, you had come to the conclusion that he had found another girl and lost interest in you.

You said goodbye to your friends and were leaning against the reception desk, looking for a hair tie in your bag.

You had found it and were finally tying up your hair when you heard a familiar voice call out to you.

You turned around and found Bucky a few feet away, holding a bouquet of colorful flowers.

Your friends who were behind the desk began to sigh and squeal excitedly, you placed a hand over your mouth, hiding the wide smile that was about to spread across your cheeks.

“Oh Bucky, what happened now?” You teased, crossing your arms against your chest. “Pollen allergy?”

He laughed, hiding his face behind the flowers. “Actually, miss, it's a very serious allergy to 'being away from you'” You blushed when he approached and your friends sang a chorus of “Ownnn how cute!”.

“This one should be easier to deal with” you said as he approached.

“There is only one treatment option” He said with conviction, making you laugh.

"And what would be?"

“You agree to go out with me” he said and extended the flowers towards her.

You took them and smiled “I would love to.”

“Exams state that she has some internal injuries that have not been treated correctly, her brain has been badly affected so she is going to be treated for the headaches that will definitely bother her for the rest of her life” Tony was listing while Steve and Bucky followed him towards the medical wing with quick steps.

“She's also going to need physical therapy because apparently her shoulder ligament was torn at least three times, and lastly most importantly…” Tony stopped in front of a door turning to Steve and Bucky with a hard look “She She hasn’t spoken a word since she opened her eye, we don’t know if she just didn’t want to talk or if there was something behind it.”

Bucky was shaking, he couldn't even imagine what your reaction would be like.

Tony opened the door and walked in, Steve was right behind him when Bucky pulled him out of the room.

“I don’t know if I should go” Bucky said unsure, Steve frowned.

“Bucky, she’s still your wife, why don’t you want to see her after so many years apart?” Steve grabbed his friend by the shoulders.

“That’s the point Steve, I want to see her more than anything, but what if she doesn’t want to see me?” Bucky asked nervously. “What if she doesn’t even remember me? What should i say? ‘Hi, I’m your husband, we’ve been married for almost eighty years, bizarre right’?” Bucky acted out to Steve. “I'm no longer the Bucky she fell in love with, I'm no longer the person who made her laugh until her stomach hurts, I haven't made anyone laugh in over seventy years” He said scratching the back of his head nervously.

“What if she doesn’t like the new Bucky? What if she doesn’t like sleeping hugged by a metal arm?” He raised his left hand, showing the wedding ring above the metal finger. “What if she doesn’t love grumpy Bucky?”

“What if she does?” Steve interrupted before he could continue. “What if she likes the metal arm? What if she starts to love annoying a Bucky who gets stressed about everything?”

Steve raised his arms, dropping them to his sides. “As far as I remember, the last time I saw her she even loved Bucky who was supposedly not alive.”

“She probably doesn’t remember that” Bucky ran a hand over his face.

“So make her remember, if today you remember so can she, you heard what the scientist said, she always ended up remembering you” Steve put his hand on the door “You haven't changed enough to have stopped loving her"

Steve entered the room, and Bucky unconsciously held his breath as he did the same.

You didn't see him right away, you were paying attention to what Tony was doing with the equipment next to you.

Bucky kept close to the door, thinking he could slip away without being noticed if he was lucky, but that was when you turned your head towards him.

It was exactly the same as when he saw you for the first time, your eyes met his and everything seemed to be in slow motion, if he ignored everything and just kept looking at you, he could easily believe that it was still the summer of 1941.

You didn't know why, but you couldn't look away, something about that man made you want to keep looking at him, his blue eyes were familiar to the butterflies in your stomach.

“Y/n... Do you know them two?” Tony pointed at Steve and Bucky.

You looked away from the man with blue eyes that made your stomach do somersaults and glanced at the blonde who was looking at you expectantly.

Something about him made you have a déjà vu about a smaller man.

You looked away from him and looked at Tony before he speaks: “That’s Bucky, and that’s Steve” You looked back at the men, you assumed the brunette was Bucky.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I know them” You apologized, seeing Bucky’s gaze drop as if you had just broken the news that someone had died. “I… I’m sorry, should I?”

“No, it’s okay” Steve said, with a sad smile.

Tony picked up a bag and placed it on the furniture next to him. “Here are some clean, comfortable clothes, I believe they are in your size, let’s wait outside while you change.”

Tony dragged the other two out of the room and started messing with something on his cell phone.

“Tony?” Bucky called cautiously, “Thank you for what you’re doing.”

“Don’t thank me” Tony looked up “We both know I still don’t like you”

Steve gave a weak smile at Tony's statement, Bucky nodded, raising his hands in surrender.

“But I know what I would feel if Pepper forgot about me” Tony looked away. “That’s why I’m helping.”

"I thank you for that"

The three looked to the door when they heard it open.

Bucky held his breath when you walked out of there wearing sweatpants and a “S.H.I.E.L.D” sweatshirt.

“Great, the clothes fit, now let’s go” Tony said, putting away his cell phone “That brunette over there is going to show you to your room”

“There are two bedrooms here” The real estate agent continued walking around the apartment. “This is where our Tour ends, I think it's the perfect apartment for you, it has a beautiful view of the city, it's close to the hospital where you work, and there's plenty of space for two people, or even three if you're thinking of start a family soon.”

You turned to Bucky with a smile on your face, the apartment was a bit trashed, but you could perfectly imagine everything you and Bucky would change in it to make it 'home'.

“What do you think, doll?” Bucky asked with a smile.

“I don’t think it could be more perfect”

This is the kitchen” Bucky said, showing the room that Tony made sure was empty.

After almost killing Tony and Steve for leaving him alone with you, he followed the path beside you, He tried a few times to make comments, but you just looked at him, smiled and responded with a nod.

He then stayed quiet, taking every opportunity he had to just keep his eyes on you, he would never pass up the chance to watch you bite your nails or bite your bottom lip, everything you did was like the best movie in the catalog for Bucky.

He watched with an adoring look as you walked around the kitchen, taking in every detail, you did the same in every other room, taking in everything and not saying a word.

“There are coffee grounds in the disposal” It was the first time you said anything since they left the hospital room.

Bucky gave the most genuine laugh he'd ever had since he could remember being Bucky Barnes, he felt so much joy over such a stupid comment because it sounded exactly like something you would say.

You couldn't help but smile at his laugh, something about that man made you feel like you couldn't avoid many things.

"Yes! Tony always complains about it, no one ever listens.”

You licked your lips, hiding your smile.

“The next thing I’m going to show you is your room” Bucky said, now smiling.

“Do I have a room?” you frowned when Bucky nodded like it was obvious. “Why are you being so nice?”

Bucky felt his heart beat faster, Is this when he says he loves you?

I mean...” you continued before he made a decision. That man in armor took me out of that horrible place, gave me medicine, did tests, and now you’re going to keep me sleeping here?” You shrugged your shoulders “You guys don’t even know me”

“This is what we do” he lied, it was all a lie, He never did for anyone what he would do for you “We help people who need help” lie, his brain screamed that he was lying, he knew you, he knows you, only he knows how you hate the dark and are afraid of needles even though you are a nurse, His heart screamed, asking him to tell you that only he knew you better than you knew yourself. “I would do this for anyone”

“Even by those you don't even know? What if I were dangerous?” You weren't, you asked him to kill every cockroach that ever appeared in your apartment, He knew you, it was killing him to be in front of you saying he didn't know who you were.

“I trust you” His vocal chords were trembling

“Why?”

“I feel like I should” Holy Ghost, you were the love of his life, even if he didn't want to he would trust you.

You stayed silent, looking at the man who looked like he was in physical pain with every word that left his mouth.

“I feel like I should trust you too” felt like the right thing to say.

Bucky felt all the fireworks in the world going off inside his stomach.

“I will prove to you that you can trust me” That was a promise, both for you and for him, at that moment he promised that he would win you over, just like he did the first time, You were the loss of his life for a long time, but now he would have you back

[azrielslightintheshadows]

Could i make a request for Cassian where him and reader aren't a thing yet but she has been in love with him for centuries but because she is so insecure and shy she doesnt have it in her to tell Cassian. So later on when nesta comes in, reader sees him spending a lot of time with nesta and reader thinks her chances are over with Cassian and is upset and starts isolating herself, not eating and getting weaker. The whole inner circle is confused by her change and worried, and finally when cassian realises, he comes in and tells reader he loves her and wants her only. They could end up being mates too...upto you!!

Forever yours.

Cassian x f!Reader.

Masterlist.

Warnings; angst.

I had so much fun writing this! Hope you enjoy it.

“Give it back” you screamed as the five young boys held your diary. They were taller than you and you couldn’t reach it. You were in the middle of a circle they created with their bodies jumping to reach your diary as they laughed. 

“Come on, just get it shortie” one of them yelled.

“Please” your voice was breaking. The tallest one was shaking your diary above his head tearing some pages with the motion.

“If I were you I would give it back” a new voice sounded. The boys turned in the direction it came from. They were so tall that you couldn’t see who it was, just the top of his head since he was taller than them, black hair was the only thing you could see. 

“We’re not you though. But thanks for the advice” one of the boys snorted. 

“It’s not an advice, it’s a warning.” 

“What are you going to do about that bastard?” The tallest one said. 

You didn’t see anything else than a blur, he moved so fast… you only heard some cracking and groans. Three of the boys ran away while the other two including the one who had your diary were on the ground, blood was pouring down their noses. And then you saw him, a boy… he looked a bit older than you, black hair that reached his chin and the most beautiful hazel eyes you had ever seen. 

“I think this belongs to you” he smiled and gave you the diary. 

“Thank you” you smiled and hugged him.

And that was how you and Cassian met almost 500 years ago. You grew up in an Illyrian camp, and because you were high fae; the Illyrian kids loved to make fun of you and hurt you. One of the women found you one day in the woods and took you in. The lord of the camp felt pity for you and let her raise you there. You later on found out that the residents of the nearby village used to sacrifice their first born if it was a female to the cauldron in order to conceive a male next time. You didn’t know who your parents were and didn’t really care, if they were able to leave a baby in the woods then you didn’t want to meet them anyway. 

Cassian became your protector after the incident and as the years passed you fell in love with him. It was hard to be in love with someone like Cass, he is a stunning male in every way possible and gets a lot of attention from the females. The other reason why it is so hard is that he is so loud and outgoing while you are shy and quiet. You couldn’t see how it would work out for the two of you if you ever became something more than friends, so you kept your mouth shut and never revealed your feelings. He would never bother with a female like me. You always thought.

Then you moved to Velaris and Rhysand gave you some duties as a healer so you kept yourself occupied and didn’t really think about the whole situation with Cassian anymore.

Later on, Feyre burst into your life and everything changed for the better, you two became good friends and you strongly believed that she discovered your feelings about him, yet she never said anything so you weren’t sure. 

But even though Feyre’s arrival brought you so much joy, you couldn’t say the same about her sisters -especially Nesta. The oldest Archeron sister was something made out of the worst nightmare, she gave migraines to everyone in the inner circle and especially Rhysand. In order to create some peace Cassian approached her and helped her overcome her addictions and fears and finally embrace what she became when she emerged from the Cauldron. You had never felt more proud of him. 

The pride though didn’t last long as the jealousy crept in; Cassian would spend more and more time with Nesta and completely ignore you and the plans you made and even though you always thought you didn’t have a chance with him this time you were sure about that. How could you ever compete with her? She was absolutely gorgeous and talented, she moved gracefully as she grew up in a wealthy family -at least until they bankrupted- and she was confident and strong. You on the other hand felt like a joke in front of her… you didn’t feel as beautiful as her, you didn’t have her grace you were raised in an Illyrian camp for crying out loud and you weren’t confident at all. 

You believed that you could handle the pain and move on but things never go as we hope. 

At first you missed training and when Cassian didn’t even notice… you were devastated so you stopped eating too. This was not a decision you made, you just completely lost your appetite. You were getting weaker and thinner as the days went by and suddenly lost every ounce of energy for social interaction. You skipped the night outs and shopping trips with Mor, you stopped hanging out with everyone and missed every dinner. The rest of the inner circle seemed to notice that and tried to approach you but you brushed them off. 

You groaned as you heard noise from the dining room, Rhysand once again decided to have a dinner party in the house of wind -your house. 

You couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t have those in the river house. You shut your bedroom’s door and laid on your bed. Maybe if you slept no one would try to bother you. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Dining room 

“What are we going to do about y/n?” Rhysand asked with a worried look on his face.

Cassian glanced around in confusion.

“Why what’s wrong with her?” He was panicking. 

“Are you serious?” Mor exclaimed. “When was the last time she came to training? Or to dinner? Or anywhere?” 

“She has lost way too much weight” Azriel added. 

Cassian’s eyebrows were furrowed as he thought everything his friends said. He was trying so hard to help Nesta in order to keep his high lord and high lady -brother and sister at this point- happy that he didn’t notice what was happening to you. He started thinking about when he last saw you acting like your old self. It was a few days after Nesta appeared…that was the last time you smiled at him. And then he realised why.

He didn’t hear anything else they said, he just abruptly stood up and hurried off to your room. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You heard footsteps down the hall and you shut your eyes again, making your breath even and parting your lips… hoping you would be able to trick whoever was coming to get you. There was a soft knock on your door and when you didn’t reply you heard it open.

Someone walked slowly towards your bed and sat down next to you. His musky scent with a little bit of spice made your heart beat faster.

Cassian. 

You felt a hand caressing your cheek and his voice soft and melodic as he spoke.

“Doll, I know you’re not sleeping… I taught you this remember?” 

You wanted to cry, he always knew when you lied… it was like he knew every part of your soul and maybe he did… after all he taught you everything you now know, you grew up together. 

You opened your eyes and glanced at him. He was so beautiful, you just stared at him not sure what to say. Cassian pulled the duvet off you and scanned your body. 

“They were right you have lost way too much weight” he frowned. You only nodded.

“What is going on doll please talk to me”  he pleaded.

“Nothing I’m okay” you muttered and tried to turn your back on him to no avail since he grabbed your hip and laid you again on your back. 

“You don’t get to do this baby. Talk to me!” 

“I’m fine Cassian leave. Nesta is probably wondering where the hell you are.” You shouted, surprising both Cassian and you. 

“So that’s what this is all about. Nesta…” Cassian smiled once you confirmed his initial thoughts. 

“Are you in love with me?” He asked, the smile never leaving his face. 

You shook your head, you didn’t want to destroy your friendship. 

“That’s a shame, because I’m completely and utterly in love with you.” You gaped at him. “From the moment I saw that little short girl crying and jumping in that circle I knew that she was the one for me. And I promised to love and protect her until my last breath. And because of that promise I didn’t want to tell you that I’m in love with you just in case I ruined our friendship and you distanced yourself.” 

You didn’t know what to say, tears filled your eyes and he wiped away the few that escaped with his thumbs.

“Cass…” you whispered.

“I love you and only you forever” he whispered back and pressed his forehead against yours.

“I love you so much that it hurts” you replied.

And then he captured your lips with his own, the kiss soft yet needy. Sparkles erupted in your stomach and then you both froze.

You felt your chest tightening and then it snapped. You gasped and stared at Cassian wide-eyed… his eyes filled with tears and he chuckled.

“We are mates” you smiled.

“Yes we are, and I am the luckiest bastard on this world” he grinned and you slapped his chest. 

Everything was going to be alright you thought as you let your mate pull you in his strong arms. 

Princess chapter 3 coming tomorrow! Requests are open!

[her-power]

So Called Chaos (Part Two: Modern single dad! e.m x fem reader)

❤️‍🩹🚨‼️18+ Minors DO NOT interact ‼️🚨❤️‍🩹

Trigger warnings/content warnings: Talk of suicide, talk of death, grief, hurt, comfort. Talk of PPD/PPA. Strong Language. Fluff. Lots of kissing, some petting, nothing explicit.

Summary: Full summary on Part One.

Word Count: 3.2k

(Reader POV)

You stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror, your hair dripping wet from your shower. You stare at the scar that sat below your left breast and wraps around to your back was slowly starting to fade, which made you happy, it was a constant reminder of that horrible night five years ago. You sigh, opening the bathroom mirror, taking out your morning pills. 80 mg of Prozac, 1000mg of gabapentin for nerve pain, Excedrin twice a day for migraines, 800mg ibuprofen for muscle pain. You didn’t even bother to go over the nighttime list; you were tired of taking pills, but it had become your daily routine for the last three years since you left the hospital. Moving back to your parents’ house was a decision you and your psychologist made together, but you were set on starting over, leaving the place where your entire life ended. Your mother’s death after the accident was the tipping point, you weren’t sure if you could handle anymore loss, and there was speculation that your mother took her own life. Your father was diagnosed with early onset dementia, you tried to visit him at least twice a week. He still had his sense of humor, but there were times he would ask you about her…about him, and you had to smile, tell him that they were okay, and change the subject.

Moving back to Indiana was a fresh start, and it almost felt like fate to you when you ran into Eddie Munson. The boy you grew to love in a short amount of time, the boy you thought about even when you said your ‘I dos’ to your late husband. Your stomach churns when you think about Sam, your sweet, kind, beautiful husband, he held on until the very end, talking to you while you were pinned beneath the dashboard, the air freezing, the sound of sirens swarming around you. You didn’t know at the time he was impaled in the stomach by a piece of metal, that once they removed him and the piece of metal, he would bleed out and die. He knew he was dying, but he made sure to keep you talking.  “Remember when we went to Aruba?”

“I can’t feel my legs…why is it so cold…”

“Keep talking to me, baby.”

“I can’t see you…where is Lily?”

“They got her out…”

“Sam…are we dying?”

“No…stay with me…”

“Do you think there’s waterfalls?”

You were delirious at that point, you were falling in and out of consciousness, your lungs were heavy, they rattled when you breathed in. 

You grip the sink in front of you, a panic attack settling in, you didn’t want to take your anti-anxiety, you need to do the deep breathing. You need this anxiety to go away before you saw Eddie, you weren’t ready to show him this side of you yet, you weren’t ready to tell him what happened to you, your husband, and your daughter. 

“We can keep her comfortable, but there is no brain activity…”

“I don’t understand…she was fine…” You whisper, the pain in your bones becoming unbearable, you felt your heart turning to stone. 

“You have been the reason why she has been hanging on for these last six months, I know you probably don’t believe it, but she can hear you. It’s your choice what you want to do next.” 

You inhale a sharp breath. “Let her be hooked up to machines or let her die? How does a mother make that decision?”

Tears fill your eyes, and you wheel yourself over to your three-year-old daughters' bedside. You take her little hand in yours. “I’m so sorry, baby girl.” You cry, kissing her palm and stroking her blonde curls. “You’re our little fighter. Daddy is waiting for you, okay? Don’t be afraid. I’ll find you.” 

You sit on the floor of your bathroom, hyperventilating and you groan, holding your stomach. You let out a loud wail, full of anger and sadness. Your family never got justice; the drunk driver was released after only being in prison for a year. And you couldn’t bear the thought of staying in the same town where he resided. 

You lean your head back, breathing in slowly through your nose and out your mouth. Deep breaths, baby. They’re coming I promise. Your heart rate slows, and your tremors disappear. 

After giving yourself a few moments to calm down more, you step into your bedroom and get dressed. You toss an oversize knitted sweater over your head, black leggings, and your doc martens. You toss your hair up into a messy bun, dab your face in subtle make up and lip balm. You stretch your back, feeling your spine pop back into place and you grab your car keys. 

You had texted him that you were on the way to the café, and he had asked you for your coffee order. When you pull into the lot, you are amazed at how quaint this place was. It must’ve been new; it was on the same strip of road where Miss Byer’s store was. 

You spot Eddie’s hair as soon as you walk in, he’s making silly faces at Hunter who is sitting in his highchair, eating a cake pop. Eddie meets your eyes, and he smiles, standing up as you walk over to him. He hugs you tightly, and you look down at Hunter who gives you a large toothy grin.

“Oh hello, handsome, you look just like your Daddy.” You smile, gently tickling his cheek and he giggles. You sit down across from Eddie who hands you your coffee and Hunter goes back to eating his cake pop, while watching a toddler educational video on Eddie’s phone. Eddie leans his chin on his palm as he stares at you and you blush, sipping your coffee. 

“You’re staring.” You giggle, tucking a stray hair behind your ear. 

“I know, I’m sorry.” He laughs, leaning back in his seat. “It’s just wild that after all this time…”

“Yeah.” You smile, looking into his eyes. The same ones you fell in love with all those years ago; the eyes that held a story, even now. 

“What have you been doing all these years?” He asks you, and you should’ve known that would’ve been a question he’d ask you. You swallow a lump in your throat, your leg bopping under the table. 

“I graduated from college with a degree in English and teaching. I was an English teacher in the town I was living in for about ten years. Met my…husband at the school I was teaching at.” You smile at him, and he smiles sweetly at you. 

“Where’s your husband now?” He asks. 

Just tell him this part. Just tell him the first part of your tragic story. The rest will come later. 

“He…he died, about five years ago.” Your eyes are welling up, but you don’t bother to push them back. 

Eddie’s breath hitches and he lets out a huff. “Jesus, I’m so sorry.” He reaches over to grasp your hand and you take it willingly. You meet his eyes; they were sad for you. 

“I’m okay.” You tell him with a grin. “I promise. I’m okay.”

You feel a damp, sticky hand pat the top of your hand and you look to see Hunter’s hand on top of yours, smiling at you. Your heart does a back flip as his blue eyes stare into yours, you take his little 

“He likes you.” Eddie says with a chuckle. “He’s a lady’s man.” 

“Sounds like someone I know.” You glance over at him, and he almost chokes on his drink. 

“I barely had any ladies.” He laughs. “A lot of them just used me because I was in a band.” 

You grin, Hunter grips onto your finger and you feel a certain love creep up on you that you have missed for so long. You make a silly face at Hunter who giggles, and then yawns. Eddie smiles, “He got up way too early this morning.” He brushes his curls from his little head. “He’s probably ready for a nap.” 

You stare at Eddie, wondering if you should say what you’re about to say. “I’m sorry about Olivia.” You say gently. “I didn’t hear much about it, just that she passed, but…I’m really sorry.” You had known Olivia as an acquaintance, seeing her at parties when you were younger, or when you would sneak into the Hideout, from what you remember she was really nice.

Eddie stares at you and swallows hard, nodding his thanks. “I didn’t know you kept up with the trials and tribulations of Eddie Munson.” He jokes.

“Social media has it’s perks.” You laugh. “Robin posts a lot of pictures of this little guy.” 

Eddie rolls his eyes and laughs. “Yeah, she’s obsessed with him. She keeps telling Vicky she wants a baby.” 

“That’s amazing.” You smile. “She should do it.” 

Hunter makes a little squeal and giggles; you take that as a cue that he was getting tired, and it was time to go. Eddie stands up, pulling him out of the highchair and you all walk out of the café. A sudden pain jolts down your leg, causing you to lose your balance but you catch yourself.

“Whoa, are you okay?” Eddie asks, gripping your forearm while Hunter rests his head on his chest. 

You try to laugh it off, but the pain was getting worse. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good. Just some muscle spasms. The luxuries of getting older.” 

Eddie could tell you were in more pain than you were letting on, and you knew you couldn’t drive. You clench your teeth, the pain radiating to your other leg as you lean awkwardly against the wall of the café. You wanted to scream at your body, for taking this moment and ruining it because of your shit damaged nerves and muscles. 

“Sweetheart…you’re shaking.” He tells you gently. “Why don’t I drive you back to my place? I don’t know if I feel alright with you driving home like this. You can sit, relax, put your feet up and we can come back for your car later.”

“Eddie, I’m fine.” You sigh. 

“You’re so not convincing.” He laughs and you stifle a giggle. He switches Hunter to the other side of his hip and gently takes his other arm and reaches out to you. “Come on, can you walk?” 

“I can manage.” You say softly, and his arm wraps around your waist as he easily lifts you from the wall and you slowly walk together towards his truck. You lean against the passenger side door while he buckles Hunter in his car seat. You rummage through your purse to find your gabapentin, and quickly take the tablet, dry swallowing it. The medication would take affect soon, so you had to suffer with the pulsating pain for the next few moments, but you’d been through worse. Eddie shuts the door to the backseat and walks over to you, you smile at him, still gritting your teeth. 

“You’re gonna tell me what this is when we’re back at my house, right?” He says, gently running his thumb over your cheek and you tremble. 

“I’m fine, Eddie.” You whisper and he dips his head down to look into your eyes, giving you a sly smirk and you laugh. “It’s nothing serious. I’m just old.”

“Liar.” He smirks, opening the door for you and he slowly helps you step up into the truck. You roll your eyes, and he winks at you, shutting the door and you sigh. 

“Da…Da…Da…Da…hee…hee…” Hunter says behind you, and you laugh.

“Yeah, your dad thinks he’s funny.” 

“Fun…ee…” Eddie is stepping into the driver’s side and whips his head to look at Hunter. 

“Did he just say funny?” Eddie looks at you, pure pride and excitement on his face. “He just said funny! Good job, buddy!” 

You smile at his boyish face, and Hunter continues to say funny over and over again on the drive back to the house. Eddie is laughing, but also feeling extremely overstimulated with the repetition of the word. “He’s gonna keep saying it, isn’t he?”

You laugh. “Yup. Welcome to parenthood.” 

By the time Eddie had pulled into his garage, Hunter was sound asleep. The medication you took was easing the pain, you were able to gently lower yourself out of his truck and follow him and a sleeping Hunter into the house. His drum set, guitar and musical equipment catches your eye as you walk up to two steps into the house and you smile, glad that he still kept his music talents going after all these years. 

He quietly shuts the door to the garage, and you stand awkwardly in the kitchen. You feel his hand on your lower back. “Go sit down, I’ll be down in a minute.” He whispers and you nod, carefully making your way towards the couch. You flinch as you sit down, you stretch out your legs, wincing as another shooting pain radiates down your leg. You try to focus on something else besides the pain and look at the framed photographs on the wall. There was a nice one of Eddie and Hunter what looks like to be his first birthday and Hunter is holding a toy guitar. You see one of Olivia holding Hunter when he was just born, you had forgotten how pretty she was, and you could see where Hunter got his eyes from. There was a framed autograph picture and gold record of Master of Puppets. That makes you smile, and seeing all the Lord of the Rings merchandise that graced his walls. The pain subsides and you perch your feet up on the ottoman, staring up at the ceiling when you hear Eddie come walking down the hallway. He places the video monitor on the coffee table next to him, sitting down across from you. 

“How long have you been in pain like this?” 

You smirk, he gets right to it. 

“Five years.” You whisper, pulling your left leg under you and stretching out your other leg. 

His eyes widen. “Five years? What happened?”

You sigh. “Eddie, it was a long time ago. I just got some nerve damage and crappy muscles in my legs. It’s just something I have to live with.” 

“What happened?” He asks you again and you sigh, pulling your hair out of your bun and letting it fall, rubbing your scalp to soothe the tightness. 

“Car accident. We were hit by a drunk driver.” You whisper. 

Eddie is quiet. “Is that how your husband died?” 

You nod, stretching out your leg again, you wanted to leave out what happened to Lily for as long as you could. “That is how my husband kicked the bucket.” You lean forward to massage your calf and chuckle. “Sorry, my trauma response is dark humor.” 

Eddie stares at you, pointing to your shoes. “May I?” You stare at him and then your shoes. 

“What do you want with my shoes?” 

He laughs. “I don’t want your shoes, dummy. Take them off.” 

You stare at him and lean forward, untying your boots and kicking them off your feet. You stretch your toes and Eddie takes your foot, resting it against his knee. 

“Where does it hurt the most?” He asks you, gently massaging the top of your foot. 

“Eddie, you don’t have to do this.” You say, blushing at the softness of his fingers as they glide over the exposed skin of your ankle. 

“You’re in pain, and I’m not a fan of people I care about being in pain.” He smiles at you. “Where does it hurt?” 

You sigh, pointing to your middle calf area. “Here.” 

He gently rubs his palm against your calf, and you groan, he stops and meets your eyes. “Are you okay?”

“It’s just…” You sigh, adjusting your position. “Why are you doing this?” 

Eddie isn’t sure how to answer that, he isn’t sure why he’s doing it. He just knows he wants to; he wants to make you feel better. His hands continue to massage your calf, and he gently lifts your pant leg. The first thing he sees is the end of a stem of a tattoo, covering a large scar. The tattoo is three red roses, wrapped around a thin sword. Eddie glances up at you and sees that your eyes are filling with tears, and you have to look away from him. 

“Hey, hey, hey.” Eddie leans towards you, cupping your cheek and you shake your head, tears spilling over your cheeks. You inhale, gasping as a sob escapes your lungs and he moves next to you on the couch, pulling you to him. He holds the back of your head and cradles you to his chest. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to overstep.”

“You…you didn’t…” You gasp and you have to pull back from him. “Eddie…I’m not…I’m not the girl you remember…there’s things that happened that completely changed the person I was.”

Eddie stares at your face. “I’m not the same boy you remember.”

You meet his eyes. “This was a mistake, coming here. Seeing you…there’s so many things that are coming back and so many feelings that I can’t even process right now. I can’t let you see this side of me, you’ve already seen too much.” 

He whispers your name, reaching up to hold your face and you try to flinch away, but his hands are soft, and he instantly relaxes you. “What I see is a woman who is trying her damn best to keep her head above water, who experienced too much loss. What I see is a beautiful, strong, resilient woman who I can’t believe walked back into my life.” 

You squeeze your eyes shut, shaking your head. “Eddie…”

“If you want to leave, you can leave, but I’m telling you right now…there’s a reason we met at the bookstore. There’s a reason you’re here right now…after all this time.” His face is so close to yours and you can’t help but stare directly into his eyes. 

“I can’t bring you into this…with everything you have going on.” 

Tell him what happened to Lily, baby.

No. No. I can’t. I can’t. It’s too damaging. I don’t even like saying it.

The two of you can help each other. 

No, no, Sam, please. I can’t. It’s not fair to him.

I think he loves you.

I loved you! And you died. 

Tell him, baby. 

You squeeze your eyes shut, shaking your head, tears continuing to spill on your cheeks. This was too much; all of this was too much. 

You take his hands away from your face, pressing your forehead against his. You couldn’t tell him.

Not yet.

You couldn’t tell him about your baby girl.

Your forever three-year-old.

Not yet.

Not yet. 

So instead, you kiss him. 

(Taglist - thank you for all your support my beauties, it means the world - @mysticpeachobject @kellsck @eddiesguitarskills @fearless-wretch-insanity @darknesseddiem @amberolivia666

[anadiasmount]

limit - jude bellingham series.

quick sum: shy and innocent uni student by day but a notorious street racer at night, meets now currently best footballer jude bellingham under certain circumstances. what happens when these two are forced to get along, in order for them to get out of trouble? will they sacrifice their careers in order to protect themselves?

wc: 4.7k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist

psa 🗣️: hello! this is a request mixed with an idea i had. this is a small five-part series since I didn’t want to do a large fic. i really hope you enjoy since it’s a enemies to lovers, ‘she fell but he fell harder’, car girl! reader, and jude being somewhat cocky and mean but a huge teddy bear. pls note that i don’t condone any street racing or hectic driving! this series will have mature content so minors DNI 🔞. it will also contain other issues dealing with family domestic issues, mentions of being insecure, etc, but I'll place the warning then :) please enjoy chapter one, and let me know your thoughts! 🤍

“Now class I hate to stress this enough but you have to take exquisite and thorough notes. It will not only guide you but help and take you to the correct path for this course,” said Professor Alto. I felt like rolling my eyes and walking out of the lecture room, but instead, I just turned over and laughed with Marie, who was already staring at me. “He says that every class period, I'm starting to get annoyed because we’ve been taking this class for the past month,” Marie snickers.

“True but in all honesty he does have a point,” I raise my eyebrow and look back at the Professor who was now walking back and forth presenting the slides. “Shut up. We get it you’re smart,” Marie groans and pushes my shoulder, taking out some gum and then paying attention forward. “I'm sorry, I would like to run my own business one day, and this is where I have to start first.” This time I push her shoulder, and hear her mutter a ‘Yeah yeah whatever…’

I grabbed my bag and pulled out my notebook, took different coloured pens, and began to write down the slides, using other different coloured pens to write important texts and or highlights. It’s just girly things. We would be here for a while, as this lecture would take up to three hours, so I got comfortable. “What are you wearing tonight?” Marie whispered, leaning her head on my shoulder as she typed away.

“Probably something black,” I shrugged, “I might wear this new corset top and black jeans since I'm racing tonight.” Marie looked over at me with wide eyes, “But isn't your car still in the shop?”

“No, it got fully fixed two days ago, and tonight I wanna see if the new adjustments are working properly,” I say, taking a sip of water and rubbing my eyes as they feel dry. “Y/n are you sure that’s a good idea though? You just got your car back, and knowing how you race, especially after just getting it back can be dangerous. If something happens, all that work that was done would go to waste,” Marie stresses, and I notice that because she began to talk with her hands.

“I know the risks, trust me. But I need this money for me, my mom, and my little sister. I'm working two double shifts and if I win tonight, I'm set for the next two months. It won’t be an easy race, but at this point what more can I do?” I sigh and rub my temple, a small migraine wanting to form.

It wasn't easy anymore. It became harder when we had to move out of my dad’s place as he began to become a different and mad person. It wasn’t the environment I wanted to be involved in, let alone my mother and sister. It became especially harder when he came and did mass destruction on our property, and tried to hurt us. The night repeatedly lives in my head, the screams, the yelling, the smashing windows, the red and blue lights, it's hard to sleep as any time I close my eyes I just see him.

I always had a great relationship with him. We were close and happy. I grew up wanting to be him, and he always set examples and tried for us. He would do my hair, teach me how to cook his chocolate chip cookies, and even go on to show me how to play the piano. We spent every weekend working in his mechanic shop, working on dear old Darla for one day to be driven by me. The old black Ford was now ruined into pieces when he went crazy after discovering he would be arrested.

What changed in him to become that way, was the question I kept repeating over and over again. If the truth comes out one day, maybe we can be at peace. But for now, it's being cautious and assuring the safety of my family. I sacrificed a lot to be able to support us, as well as my mom. The car racing was something I randomly got into, my mom didn't like it, but in a way for me, I escaped reality.

The adrenaline rush. The speed. The rush overtakes my body. The determination to win as the prize in the end holds a lot of possession. Maybe even the idea of it being illegal also took a more motive of why not, as bad as it sounded. I became a hell of a driver, I was the best of the best, and some people took that personally.

The tracks and races became a second home to me. The ability to conduct and take charge of my own was truly an honour. For once, only I listened to myself instead of others. For once I could do something that made me happy, as much as it felt wrong to do. I met people, good and bad, and stayed away from the bad as they reminded me of my dad. A weekend like tonight started at the tracks but indeed by the city in the underground club Sahara.

I saved enough to buy myself a 2014 black Dodge Challenger. Slowly I made work by changing the motor from a V6 to a V8, running to almost 470 horsepower. The rims were also replaced with all black, and I added other features like a loud exhaust and a cold air intake system, just recently. This would’ve never been done if I didn't have Jimmy, an old friend of my dad’s. He never questioned what I did to my car, just wished me ‘good luck, and be careful’.

When my mom found out about my car, she threatened to kick me out. That same night I brought back $1,800 and left them on the table, muttering a quick “This is why I do what I do”. Since then she hasn’t questioned, just used the money for savings, groceries, and bills. I would of course help out, especially on bigger and expensive things, like Uni. Uni was expensive, and I sure as heck was lucky to afford what I could.

My first race was over a year ago, in the older tracks leaving Madrid. It was a secluded area only known to nearby residents, or people like me who raced, or those who went to live life a little. You could expect anyone there. I knew of this place after Marie and her girlfriend Kaia took me. My first race was that same night after a girl got pissed at me for accidentally bumping her shoulder with her boyfriend.

One thing led to another, and then you saw me at the finish line in Marie’s Grey Nissan Altima. That baby could run, period.

Part of me could say I also got addicted to how much money it would bring home. I didn't care if it was clean or dirty money, it met my needs, and I was grateful for it. Multiple people have gone against me but they can’t race like I can. There are tips and tricks to it, whether it is releasing the clutch early or letting the car struggle a bit before making the shift. Slow down or maybe speed up. You learn along the way.

My biggest rivals of them all were Jacey and Jacqueline. They made my life a living hell a week before finals. They insisted and threatened me to race them or else I would be kicked out and can’t ever place my foot on the tracks. They were the best anyone had seen, but I knew what they wanted. They were a part of a malicious gang in the northern part of Spain. If I won, I would be free and they were to never bother me, but if I lost I would do laundering and drug exchange.

I won that night, by some miracle. It turned out Jacey was racing unfairly and it didn't count as he had cheated. They would always go against me, and it became sort of a rival race whenever we did go against each other. Like tonight. Tonight would be a big night, it would be a packed race, and surely every young adult would be there.

“Wait, wait, wait. You’re going against Jacqueline tonight? How could you have failed to tell me this?” Marie ran, her back across the wall as I got myself a redbull to survive the rest of the day. We had a 20-minute break, and now we were seated outside waiting to go back in.

“I didn’t know either, Max texted me this just a couple of hours ago,” I said, taking a sip of the energy drink. I pulled out my phone and showed her the message. “Well, I can see why you’re doing this then,” Marie points to the text of the amount of cash I could win. “What did you end up fixing in your car?”

“I did a bit of mostly everything. I added high-flow catalytic converters, high-flow mid pipes, high-flow fuel injectors, high-flow air induction systems, an upgraded header, and upgraded pulleys. Just newer stuff that the new challengers have nowadays,” I say, laughing at Marie's confused face staring back at me. “Well whatever you said, let’s hope it works out.”

“Trust me it will. Because you’ll be in the seat next to me to see” I smirked.

“Bitch no I am not, the fuck?” Marie gives me a puzzled look. I give her a look for using such profanity. I hated it, I didn't like such strong and hateful words, especially those that meant hurting someone's feelings. I never cursed, I just didn't see the fun or thrill of it, which shocked many.

“You are because you lost the bet last week. And Sheila is out of town. So better bring your mask and helmet,” I say, opening my iPad to get some studying done before my business class after this lecture. “Plus when have you ever turned down the opportunity to ride with me? I know you secretly love it,” I wink at her to which he just shakes her head and smirks.

“I'll do it, but only if you wear the black midi skirt I got you. As a matter of fact, I’ll ride with you only if you let me get you ready and get you sexy,” Marie says. I blush profusely and immediately shake my head no. I would rather die than be seen wearing anything more revealing than my boobs. I'm just too shy and not confident for it. I can’t rock outfits like Marie can.

“Funny but no. You know me, I am good with a revealing top and maybe some tight jeans,” I brushed her idea once again, but knowing how she could be, especially when she's a fashion major, it would be hard. “Either deal or no deal. You know you need me in order to race,” she tries to intimidate to which I finally agree. “I will make you the sexiest girl there. Who knows maybe you’ll be lucky and get laid,” she taunts, an evil grin on her lips.

“Marie!”

“Oh quit the act. We know you are shy and innocent, but you become a freak and a total show when you race. I'll see you tonight,” she winks and walks out, completely leaving the lecture.

—/— Jude’s Point of View —/—

After matches came recovery. And after recovery, it was either a day off or prepping for the next match. Luckily I had the gym area to myself, working with a physical trainer on my knee and doing a few exercises that were as much work. I just needed something to preoccupy my mind before I met with my publicist. It's not that I hated him, I just didn't tolerate such a person like him.

I dragged out this meeting as far as possible but knowing how he is, he wouldn't care. After briefly talking with the PT about a few stretches I could do at home, I walked down the cafeteria and met up with Eduardo, who invited lunch for the both of us. We sat down and just talked about the game plays and the upcoming international break.

Lunch went by quickly, now I found myself walking down the small hallway into the office that belonged to my publicist. I resented him even more for working at the training grounds. I would rather be anywhere else but here. I put myself together and walked into the office only for it to be empty. I just take a seat and go on my phone bored. When Jaime does walk in, he hangs up and opens the manilla folder, where stacks of papers are in.

“Jude you have to quit going out so much! Look at all these articles!” Jaime raised his voice and threw the printed papers onto the marble desk. I rolled my eyes and sunk into my chair, my legs naturally spread apart, as my hand came to my temple.

“Real Madrid’s new star boy stars on and off the pitch. Ancelotti’s new golden boy has a record similar to Grealish, could we expect to see the young player get involved in the same stuff? Oh, my favourite, Jude Bellingham is seen leaving the strip club after the place was recently investigated by local authorities!” Jaime read off the articles, leaning forward to slap the side of my head, when he noticed my unfazed look. “Okay, I get it! Shit!”

“No Jude you don’t get it! How many times have I told you this isn't England? You're in Spain. Dealing with both countries who are on your ass to find every single detail of you. They follow you around with a camera because you let them, you give them a reason too. It's already the fans doing it, but the paparazzi, no I won’t let that slide,”

“Okay, so what do you want me to do? I’ve done everything you’ve suggested me to do! I can’t stop them, or else I'll end up on the cover the next morning. I can’t just quit my fun, because of them. I deserve to have a nice evening with my friends and family, but they're always there!” I bite back.

Not even my mother keeps tabs on me like this man does. I appreciate Jaime, but it's moments like this where I want to get up and leave and do the opposite of what he tells me to do. He takes his job too seriously and overworks himself way too much. I can’t exactly be the person he wants me to be. I hate being driven around or being forced to be someone I'm not.

“We have no say and do on the paparazzi, you know that. But if you keep doing what you do, I'll have to get you a stricter PR contract, and I can assure you, it will be hell. You choose Jude. One more fuck up and it's the first text you’ll receive the next morning,” Jaime threatened.

“You can’t be serious. Jaime, I can’t be hidden away the entire time! I don’t give a shit about what they think of me! I'm focused on football and my family. I told you to let them be and write what they write!,” I say, standing up and grabbing my training bag to leave. “It's my job to protect your image as a person and footballer, Jude. And it will be like that. If you have such an issue, go ahead and fire me, but we both know what that will do for the both of us…”

“One more fuck up Jude, and you will see.” I scoff and walk out, slamming his door. The office workers jump in their seats, while I mumble out curses and insults towards him. Would he really go that far just to keep his job? Threaten my image for his self-satisfaction? Yes, he would. I sigh and scratch my chin impatiently, trying to come up with a different plan to avoid the PR contract he was talking about. But all I could do was come up with reasons and stuff to piss him off.

The idea of a PR stunt sounded stupid. Sure, I have had my share of scandals but nothing too serious like he dramatises. People just can't seem to stand the idea of no commitment, especially if it involves girls. They also couldn't stand the idea of a footballer wanting to go out and enjoy a night of themselves. Some people can be so unreasonable, like Jaime, I would say what I had to say, and I didn't care for anyone’s feelings especially if I spit out the truth.

“Yo! Hey Jude! What’s up? Looks like you got back from speaking with Carlo,” Eduardo comes up and dabs me up, teasing me for my stressed look. I chuckle, “Nah man. My publicist is pissing me off. Trying to tell me what to do and giving me shit about all these articles.”

“When will they learn,” he comments, his brow nudging to the obvious. “For the moment mine hasn't given me ‘advice’ or ‘warnings’ after our trip to South France.”

“Well lucky you. I just can’t stress about this shit right now. We have the upcoming important games, and I am determined to win. And if I do go out, he shouldn’t be up my ass about it every time,” I groan, taking out my phone and seeing a call from Aurélien. “Tchou, how can I help you?” I joke, referring to when he dealt with his situationship while on our trip to France.

“Ha ha, very funny. What are you up to tonight? We’re free tomorrow.”

“Probably nothing. Just walked out on my publicist, so If you have anything in mind to do, say it,” I put the phone on speaker so Eduardo could hear, and let him know. “Me and the guys were gonna head out the city to go to a car meet, out of Madrid,” he says. I give a look to Eduardo who just shrugs his shoulders not retaining the information.

“A car meet? Those exist here?”

“Yes, dumbass. You’d be surprised but, they're very fun. Although we shouldn't be there, it's the only place where people and paparazzi can’t recognize us. They treat each other and us like royalty, plus who wouldn’t mind some fun?” Aurélien says to us. I hesitate, only because of what just happened inside, but also the idea of it being illegal and caught. “You guys in or not?”

“Count me in.”

Jaime wouldn't know. And if Aurélien is saying we wouldn't be recognized, then why the fuck not? I'm not here to just pose for cameras and play. I'm also a regular person who deserves to live his life the way I want. Part of me thought of how bad this idea could be, but truthfully I didn’t give a shit, I just wanted to piss off Jaime. Aurélien advises us to dress nice since people who attended those car races often thought of them as fashion shows. Which is found myself calling the only girl who could help me out.

“Hey, Sunny? Sorry for the late call, could you help me out with an outfit for tonight? Just don't mention it to Jaime.”

—/— (Your Point of View) —/—

“Ok no- That’s like way too revealing! I couldn't pull that off” I brushed away the shortest skirt she found. “Nuh uh- No way. You're going to wear it, and it's going to be worn with these shoes and lace meshy top,” Marie comes behind me and puts both hangers to my front. “My whole butt is out in this skirt! People are gonna see my-” I waved with my hands to my lower region to which she snickers.

“Either you race or don’t,” Marie says, to which I just squint my eyes together. “Fine! I will at least pick out my jacket!” I pick up the clothes and quickly change into the pieces of clothes she gave me. My makeup was already done, a simple and not too heavy look since I had to wear a mask and helmet underneath while I raced. All I had to do was take my hair out of my rollers and apply some deodorant and jewellery and we could make the drive down.

Marie gasped as I walked out, clapping her hands excitedly as she approached me. “You look so fucking hot, I could make out with you!” Her hands roam and fix my skirt so they pull lower and hang around my hips. I give her a look but she quickly shrugs me. I go to the mirror and tug on both items. “I don't know whether to pull this up or or tug it down,” I say shuffling.

“Hurry! Fix your hair and put your boots on. You have a race to win!”

I pose for a selfie when I see Marie point her phone towards me, my hands on the steering wheel as I pull into the gravel road that heads to the main road to the tracks. Goosebumps raise my skin as I hear the music and loud car exhaust as we pull in. Other cars are doing donuts, which I find silly, or showing off their engines. “Hi Matty, how are ya tonight?” I ask the middle-aged man who sighs and hands me my racer number and time slot. He’s tired of his job, but just like everyone else here, he has his reasons. “Same old same old. I bet money on ya tonight, so you better win against that trashy girl Jacqueline,” he points out, handing me back the cashback after I paid. “Good luck tonight, make us proud!” he winks.

I smile and shift to one as I drive down to the start of the line. The tracks are old and kinda messy. They can shift from gravel to normal roads, which causes some drivers to lose focus. “Nervous for tonight?” Marie asks to which I nervously nod. “I mean it's against Jacqueline, we’ve had our shares in the past and she’s good,” I say.

“Yeah but not as good as you. Keep that in mind. Just think of the money, it will be your motive,” she says. We open the door and step out, I hear commotion and then look up to people cheering for me. I wave and thank them before walking over to our group who’s standing by the starting line. We all hug and chat about the race, which is filled with a lot of rivals going head to head.

I could feel my blood pumping as I watched the two Mustangs take out, their exhaust fumes following. The excitement you face also comes to anticipation as you watch which car will make it first to the end. The yellow Mustang wins by .4 seconds after they race for almost two minutes. I turn to the side when I hear my name being called, “Y/n, when are we gonna race?”

“As soon as you let me see what’s under your hood,” they scoff and walk off. It would've been too easy…

—/— (Jude’s Point of View) ---/—

The black LV suit was perfect for the occasion. Aurélien was right, people do dress as if they were attending fashion shows here. We all decided to go in two cars, making the almost forty-minute drive down to this closed-off restricted area. We followed the guide who led us up to the almost ‘VIP’ area.

The commotion was loud. People were either drinking, making out, or dancing. Or those who wanted to feel lucky, gambled money by playing poker. This truly did feel like a bad idea now, but I couldn't care less now that I was drinking a beer. We had clear and perfect views of the track, I was lucky to attend an F1 show in the past but this? This was completely different.

Fancy or new cars racing, and it was just the beginning. I talked with Eduardo for a good time as I observed the loud car go head to head towards the finish line. Music played loudly, but as Aurélien had said, no one recognized us. We step out and that’s when I notice the black challenger pull in. Two girls step out, but it's the driver who gets my attention. She chews gum and listens with boredom as they explain the rules to her.

My eyes roam down her slim and fit body, and I get a closer look when she quickly puts on her mask and helmet. I find myself not being able to look away, especially after she faces her opponent, ignoring their truce handshake. She’s too confident and now has my full attention.

Her windows are rolled down, her hand on the wheel, and the other is on the gear shift, patiently waiting for the light to turn green. “Who’s that?” I finally speak, completely forgetting I was in mid-conversation with Eduardo. “That’s Y/n in the black challenger. And in the red camaro is Jacqueline. They hate their guts, biggest rivals after Jacqueline's brother cheated on a race. Y/n, she’s the best of the best…” speaks a different guy. “Word on the street is that Jacqueline is involved in a gang, but who knows,” he says.

Y/n pulls out her thumb signalling she’s ready, and then quickly drives off when the light turns green. Just like the guy had said, she was the best of the best, quickly drifting and turning onto the tracks. Her car was faster than the red camaro, and you could tell the determination to win was there. I just waited for it to go the other way.

Soon yelling and commotion started when Jacqueline caught up, and took the lead, Y/n just maintained her speed and control as before. “What is she doing? She’ll lose if she doesn't catch up!” said another guy. I furrowed my brows and crossed my arms, looking back at the two cars on the race track. I didn’t understand how this worked, but it looked like not even I could make those turns, especially at those speeds.

Everyone gasped or oohed when the camaro lost control and failed to do the sharp tight turn correctly, cheering when Y/n went back to the lead and quickly made it to the finish line. We walked down to the starting line where she got out, and put her hands up, and cheered. She took her helmet and mask off, and that's when I truly was drawn to her facial features. “Bro? You’re drooling,” Brahim joked to which I just pushed his shoulder.

The crowd went quiet as the red camero pulled in, an angry Jacqueline and passenger getting off to confront Y/n. “You cheated!” she points at her to which the girl wearing all black just snorted and chuckled, “No babes. You just suck. I won, just like the other times before. Now go whine somewhere else and leave us alone for once.”

Her eyes connected with mine, and it felt like time just slowly flew by. Her lips parted, as she took me in, her hand holding the helmet and now stack of cash. She looked away and shyly smiled towards her friends, them congratulating her. She would nod then and there and only stick with those friends. “I’ll be back. Going to congratulate the winner,” I say and smile at Eduardo who wishes me luck. I don't need luck I'm Jude Bellingham.

I was determined to know more about her. Who she was, and why she raced especially. But before I could introduce myself, a loud bang and glass shattering prevented me from doing so. The last I saw while we ran was Y/n getting into her car and driving away. A loud car pulled near us, the familiar face and eyes locking with mine.

“Hurry! Get in!”

---/--- ( author's note) ---/---

hiiiii! first chapter eeekkkk! I hope you all enjoyed it and didn't think this was too long! I truly enjoyed writing this, and can't wait for you guys to read the rest. I'm also praying this doesn't flop or I'll be really upset... have an amazing day!

[ancha-aus]

Ghosts & Medium AU Drabble - New Haunting

I am back :3 With a continuation of the drabble where Killer and Dust meet!

And what happens after :D

*-----------------------*

Dust sighs as he reads his notes over.

Ash grumbles from beside him "At least eat your breakfast."

Dust shrugs but blindly grabs the cinnamon roll to nimble on as he checks the notes he made.

Almost a week had passed. A WEEK!

And Dust still hadn't managed to get Killer to leave the house. Which is unusual for him. Most of the time it takes him a day or two to get the ghost to move on. Three if it is a hard case.

Killer?

Killer does not seem any closer to moving on.

At least Dust didn't get a migraine from being around him anymore. As he normally gets that after long exposure to new spirits.

Sadly instead he gets a headache from the other's constant flirting and pickup lines.

Ash sighs "Can't we just write this off as a lost cause? Tell the family to stay somewhere else for a bit until he moves on himself?"

Dust is honestly considering it at this point. He is starting to think tha tKiller jsut doesn't want to move on. and the poltergeist is stubborn. If he doesn't want to go he clearly isn't going.

Dust sighs "I am honestly considering it..." he reads his list over again. it isn't as if he hadn't figured it out by now. Killer had a very... violent past. He worked for many people and had very little freedom for himself. something went wrong and he was tortured before being left to die somewhere alone.

Dust had figured all of that out at this point. but nothing could get him to move on.. because in a lot of ways.. Killer had already moved on from that past. Even if some fears remained but those are normal, even for living people.

Dust sighs as he puts his things away "at least Killer is mostly docile now. I will just tell the family i couldn't fix it and advice them to stay out for a bit. Let killer think the family moved out and move on to a new spot."

Ash nods "make it someone elses problem."

Dust frowns as he rubs his arm "i don't know..."

ash sighs "hey i know. you cant fix all the ghosts."

They get to the house and Dust has a conversation with the family. explain he can't fix it but that moving out and leaving the house empty for a while could pursuade the ghost to leave. Dust advices them to make a show of packing their things and to just sleep over at a friends place for a while.

The family isn't happy. but are willing to try it.

Dust watches them move stuff and their bags to their car as he goes in to say his own goodbyes to Killer. wish him the best and then leave himself.

Dust takes a seat at the coffee table and Killer is immediantly in his personal bubble with a large smile "Hey!! I was wondering when you would get here." he grins and winks "you just can't stay away from me and my charms." and he winks again.

Killer does that a lot. the winking.

Dust shrugs "only fair to come by and finish stuff up."

Killer blinks and freezes "waht?"

dust tilts his skull "the family is leaving after all... they hired me to talk with you and stuff. try and get you to leave. I can't make you leave."

Killer frowns and grows quiet. clearly processing the news. Dust told him ages ago that he had been hired to help get killer to move on. Killer had been more worried about the fact that dust was working for someone over the whole exorcising thing.

Killer frowns "but... if the family leaves... you can just move in!" and he grins widely "You can stay here with me!"

Dust tilts his skull "I got my own home. I can't stay."

Killer frowns more and the red target, that had started to show off a soul shape before, becomes a target again as the black sludge gets worse.

Killer is looking from side to side as he frowns. clearly thinking and planning quickly.

Killer frowns as he floats closer "When would you be back?"

Dust blinks as Ash makes a groaning sound behind him "Of coruse you get a clingy ghost."

ironic seeing as Ash is the most clingy of them all but Dust doesn't say that instead he answers killer "I... would likely not come back... I go where i can get jobs and work..."

Killer shakes his skull and mutters things "We can't do that! long distance relationships are much more likely to fail than normal relationships."

Dust blinks "euh.. what now?"

Killer points between himself and dsut "our relationship obviously!! We only jsut started this! we can't complicate things with long distance!"

Dust suddenly feels like he missed some very important information along the way "we... aren't dating?"

Killer shoots him a grin and floats closer "obviously not quite. but we are now in the phase of the 'will they won't they' so it is important we keep interacting and spend time together!"

Dust looks unsure at Ash but his brother isn't much help as ash just stares at killer as if killer is an idiot. Dust looks forwards himself "euh... it... wouldnt work? You are a ghost? I am still very much alive..." and not plannign on changing that anytime soon. mostly because Ash will END him if Dust did something stupid and got himself killed.

Killer grins and winks "oh bunny. Of course we can make it work."

Yeha Dust thinks he lost the plot of this a while ago. he tries to get the focus back to the point he was trying to make "anyway... I need to go... I still need to get work to pay for things... It was nice to meet you killer and-"

Killer gasps loudly "That is it!" he points at Ash "That is the answer!"

Ash looks confused as well "what."

Killer nods and flies straight at Dust and dust yelps as killer just flies through him.

Dust shudders at the feeling of cold and the different energy not to forget the flashes of Killer's past life. too fast for him to keep track off and mostly just overwhelming.

Killer grins "That should have been enough!"

Dust shoots him a glare as he rubs his sternum. "What was that for?!" Ash hovers near him worried as his brother looks him over.

Killer grins and waits.

Dust frowns but then he feels it.

Oh... Oh no.

Killer grins "oh yes!" he nods "You couldn't stay meanign it was me who would ahve to move! But anchoring myself to all kinds of places and moving that the whole time would get annoying. sooo!! I did what your brother did!"

Ash screeches "You did what?!"

Yup. That are two links now. Two different spirits are both using him as an anchor to remain.

Fucking hell.

...

What the fuck is he suposed to do with this situation?!

...

He better get a good fucking tip for this shit from this stupid family.

*-----------------------*

[neytui]

Today's my birthday!!!! ✨✨

Some vent below

The past few months have been a complet mess for me. First on march, my great aunt who has been diagnosed with cancer for two years sadly passed away, this was no surprise for any of us so I was not as sad about it if I'm honest. A week before this my dad had an accident and broke his talon and had to have surgery, this was the same day my aunt passed. My dad is fine and has healed all good. Now recently, a month ago I think, my cousin, who's I have grown with, same age as me, went to same school and everything, was diagnosed with a tumor on her brain. Was about 8 cm long and was causing her really strong headaches, it needed to be extracted as soon as possible, but the operation was very expensive so our family need to collect money first. We finally met a doctor willing to do the surgery and she was operated the Thursday, I saw her yesterday and she's thankfully doing fine. While we were on this, I felt incredible sick one day while I was on college, to the point I couldn't talk anymore. I went to the neurologist and he told me to get some exams, he diagnosed with athipics migraines and since that day I've been feeling sick and sad, that was on the fifteen. I was really hoping to feel good on my birthday, but that doesn't seem to be the case. I'm writing this on the 27 so I hope I'm feeling better tomorrow on my birthday. Regardless I would still like to thank everyone who welcome me on this place, I really have enjoyed it. I'm really sorry I haven't been able to post anything in a while but with the family, health, college and commission matters it has been really hard.

I hope everyone is having a good day :)

[rosella35]

Kaleb's Bad Day: Part I

*clears throat* It's been a while, G/T community!

I don't get as much time for writing anymore with my uni degree in its final years, but this is a one-shot I've been working on for an obnoxious amount of time now based on a prompt I got a while back: What if Kaleb, my borrower character, shrunk in class?

To set the scene since the last time I updated Borrowed Courage was in 2022 *sobs*, Kaleb and Brooke live in a world where the borrower race was discovered 10 years ago and unbeknownst to humankind, many borrowers use a drug called "Upsize" to temporarily grow to human size and blend into society. This one-shot is canon but probably won't be added to the main story for timing reasons. It's set roughly 2 months after Brooke first discovered Kaleb's secret identity as a borrower.

Part II will be up tomorrow - I hope you like!

Content warning: contains angst, swearing and nudity (not graphic).

****

“Alright. For the rest of today, I want you to work independently through the exercises in chapter two of your textbooks. I’ll be floating around if anyone has any burning questions.” Mr Bell instructed the class. From his seat at the back of the room, Kaleb gritted his teeth in frustration. On any other day, he would be more than happy to follow his teacher’s instructions; learning about human history was one of the things he’d enrolled in school for in the first place. From a young age, Kaleb had been fascinated with the way the giants that owned the world had came to be that way, while his kind— the borrowers— had spent their lives hidden away in the shadows. Today, though, he was only half paying attention. Kaleb ran his hands through his scruffy brown hair, finding it increasingly difficult to ignore the incessant pounding that seemed to reverberate all the way from his skull to his fingertips.  

Something was off. 

It wasn’t uncommon or him to be getting headaches from going consecutive days using Upsize, the drug that allowed him to attend human school at five feet nine instead of five inches tall. Even so, they hardly ever set in this early in the week, and were never an issue unless he was moving around too much. This one felt different. It had barely set in twenty minutes ago and was already driving him crazy. With a pained sigh, Kaleb tried to preoccupy himself with opening his textbook to the designated chapter. It felt weird to consider, since borrowers didn’t get sick nearly as often as humans did, but… maybe he was coming down with something.  

From the seat adjacent, Brooke Tucker glanced up from her own work to frown across at him. “Are you good?” She whispered, leaning forward with her hand on her chin. 

Kaleb immediately stiffened, surprised she’d even noticed his discomfort. Am I that obvious? “I don’t know.” He said uneasily. “My head is killing me.” 

The human girl’s brow creased in concern, an expression she rarely ever directed at him. If he weren’t so distracted by the pain, Kaleb probably would’ve been flattered. “Could be a migraine.” She suggested, before adding in a lower voice. “Do borrowers even get those?”

“Yes, we get migraines.” He whispered back, rolling his eyes. Since she’d discovered Kaleb’s true identity back in September, the human girl had made it her mission to find every opportunity to tease and mock him about being a borrower. Still, Kaleb couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something about this particular headache felt familiar. No way. That’s impossible. He dismissed, turning back to his textbook. “It’s probably nothing.” He assured her.

That was when he felt it.

BADUMP. 

A sudden wave of pain reverberated through his body, making him sit bolt upright in his desk like he’d just stepped on a live wire. It was a sensation Kaleb knew all-too-well, because he’d experienced it every afternoon after school for the past four years. 

His Upsize was about to wear off. 

“Shit.” He hissed, feeling the colour drain from his face. His mind reeled, struggling to make sense of why this was even happening. It was like one of his worst nightmares come to life. He should’ve had more time. He always had more time. Had Rodney messed up his dose? 

Kaleb ground his teeth together, forcing himself to focus. There was no time to dwell on the ‘why’. He had to get out of sight, and fast. 

BADUMP.

The room spun as he was hit with another rapid full-body ache, and Kaleb almost collapsed out of his chair. He felt himself start to shiver uncontrollably, the primal fear of being seen overwhelming his senses. “Kaleb, what the hell’s going on with you?” Brooke’s voice echoed somewhere beside him. “You’re making a scene.” 

Shit-shit-shit-shit-shit. Kaleb didn’t have to look up to know that the whole class was staring at him, a tingling feeling that sent his borrower instincts to flee into overdrive. He glanced across at Brooke, gazing unblinking into her judgemental grey-green eyes like they were his lifeline. In that moment, he made a decision.

“Why’re you staring at me like that, it’s creeping me—”

“Come with me.” Kaleb blurted out. 

That was all the warning Brooke got before he’d clamped his hand around her wrist and launched out of his seat, dragging her along behind him. 

“Sorry Mr Bell, we’ll be right back!” He announced in a rush of adrenalin, practically stumbling out the classroom door. Brooke, who had been too bewildered to react to their sudden exit, finally came to her senses as they entered the empty hallway. She ripped her hand out of his grasp, ears reddening in second-hand embarrassment from what had just gone down.

“What the fuck was that about?” She hissed, though her expression shifted to concern when he leaned heavily against the wall several paces in front of her, clutching his head. For the first time, Brooke noticed the raw, unsuppressed fear in his eyes.  

“I can explai—” Kaleb started, but broke off with a startled yelp when he felt the shrinking process finally kick in. He could only catch a glimpse of Brooke’s startled expression before the ground rushed towards him and he was swallowed up by his human clothes that were suddenly hundreds of sizes too big. Within the span of a few seconds, he found himself back at his original five-inch-tall height and buried beneath the course folds of his t-shirt, chest heaving from the lingering adrenalin and body frozen in terror as the reality of his situation dawned. 

Brooke, having witnessed the whole thing, did a double take. “What in the—” One second Kaleb had been standing there in front of her, and the next… Her eyes fell to his unoccupied pile of clothes, and she swore, realising what had just happened. 

“Kaleb? Brooke? Is everything okay with you two?” She froze at the sound of Mr Bell’s voice from inside the classroom, his footsteps growing closer and closer.

Panicking, Brooke scrambled to scoop up the bundle of Kaleb’s clothes, quickly locating the squirming figure buried within, and shoved them behind herself. The second he felt her fingers close around him and lift him blindly into the air, Kaleb’s heart leapt into his throat. He shivered involuntarily, the sensation of powerful human hands around his entire frame serving as a stark reminder of how little control he had over their current situation. All he could do was make himself as small as possible in her grip and trust Brooke to handle things with the teacher. 

“Y-Yep!” The human girl said, turning around just as the Mr Bell poked his head out the classroom door. Her hands tightened protectively around Kaleb’s smaller form under the clothes, feeling his tiny heartbeat flutter like a bird’s against her fingers. She cleared her throat awkwardly in attempt to compose herself. “I mean… actually, Kaleb wasn’t feeling well. He went ahead to the nurses office, but would you mind if I go too? J-Just to make sure he’s okay.” 

The teacher gave her a strange look, and Brooke held her breath, waiting for him to notice the bundle of Kaleb’s clothes behind her back and effectively blow her cover story. After a moment though, Mr Bell’s expression softened to concern. “Oh, of course you can.” He said with a nod. “I hope he feels better soon. Don’t worry about missing the rest of the lesson. I’ll email the two of you supplementary work later today.”

She managed a strained smile. “Thank you.” 

The moment he disappeared back inside, Brooke took off down the hall, her mind stalling on what she was supposed to do next. There was no way she could actually take Kaleb to the nurses office without exposing him, and it would be too suspicious if she just up and left the building in the middle of class. She cursed. There was really only one place that would give the two of them some privacy, which made her uncomfortable even thinking about, but Brooke didn’t really have a choice. 

Resigned to her fate, she made beeline for the girl’s bathroom. 

Locking herself inside a cubicle, Brooke let out a relieved sigh. She sat down heavily on the closed seat of the toilet, turning her attention to the bundle of Kaleb’s human clothes in her lap and the tiny muffled voice she could suddenly hear through the fabric. “Can’t breathe—!”

Eyes widening, Brooke loosened her hold around the clothes. It seemed silly now, but in her haste to get to somewhere private, she’d almost forgotten that Kaleb had been with her the whole time, buried underneath the layers of denim and cotton.  She was about to reach in to try and pull him out, when she realised that somewhere amongst the folded material, Kaleb was not only borrower-sized but naked. Face heating up at the thought, Brooke sat back against the toilet and cleared her throat awkwardly. “Okay, you’re safe to come out. We’re alone.” 

Sure enough, it wasn’t long after she’d spoken that Brooke noticed a miniature head of scruffy brown hair poking out through the of one of the t-shirt sleeves as Kaleb revealed himself at last. He blinked rapidly in the harsh fluorescent lighting, scrambling to cover himself with his blanket-like clothes. Without his usual shirt and tan jacket combo, he seemed almost smaller than usual, his bare shoulders slim and pale and his breaths short and fast. Fragile was the first word that came to mind. Intuitively, Brooke knew that compared to humans, borrowers really were fragile and vulnerable, but those were never words she’d associated with Kaleb. Now though, he wasn’t even trying to hide the fact that his entire body trembled like a scared animal in her hands. 

That didn’t stop her from glaring daggers at him. “What the fuck, Kaleb!” She hissed. “You almost gave me a heart attack!” 

Kaleb flinched instinctively, his hazel eyes shooting up to meet her now much larger grey ones. Brooke’s angry expression faltered. Shit. He looked terrified— even more so than the time she’d found him on the apartment roof all those weeks ago. She swallowed, turning away uncomfortably. That look in his eyes… It didn’t suit him at all. 

The two of them didn’t speak for several minutes, awkward silence permeating the cubicle. Kaleb took that time to try and compose himself, his full-body tremors slowly dissipating as he tried to calm his pounding heart. It wasn’t easy to do by any means, but he appreciated Brooke’s patience. Finally finding his voice, he tilted his head to meet her eyes. 

“S-Sorry.” He said, holding the material of his shirt around his nude frame with white knuckled hands. He licked his dry lips. “No one saw… did they?”

Brooke sighed, making a conscious effort to shift to a gentler tone of voice. Now probably wasn’t the time for their usual teasing banter. “No.” She reassured him. “Just me.” 

Kaleb visibly relaxed at that, minuscule shoulders slumping under the thick material of his shirt. “Thank god.” He breathed, almost too quiet for her to make out. So he hadn’t been seen by anyone else in the class. Just knowing that was enough to ease a significant portion of his built up anxiety. With a clearer head, Kaleb finally paused to take in his surroundings, and his jaw immediately dropped when he caught sight of a toilet roll as long as he was tall. “What the—” He exclaimed, looking up at her with an aghast expression. “Is this the girl’s bathroom—?!” 

Brooke held back a snort as his tiny face turned beet red with embarrassment. Much more like the Kaleb she knew. “You didn’t exactly give me much time to think of a better place to go.” She pointed out, sitting up straighter on the toilet seat. “And while we’re on that topic, what the hell happened to you? Isn’t your wonder drug supposed to last the whole day?” 

Kaleb flinched at that and peered down at his smaller form, pathetically dwarfed by the clothes that had fit him perfectly less than ten minutes ago. Already, without the disguise that was his human height, he was starting to feel like the fraud he was; just another borrower trying and failing to carry himself with the same level of confidence and liberty as a human. “I-I don’t know.” He mumbled. “Maybe my uncle messed up the dose.” He wrapped the the fabric of his shirt sleeve tighter around himself, feeling more exposed than ever. “This has never happened to me before.” 

“Clearly.” Brooke said. “If I hadn’t been there to cover for you, you’d’ve been screwed for sure.” 

She felt him shiver at that fact, almost making her regret her choice of words. “You’re right.” Kaleb looked up at her again, his expression earnest. “Thank you, Brooke. Really.” 

Brooke blinked. That was unexpected. She shifted in her seat and looked away, hoping he wouldn’t notice her blush. With their current size difference, that was unlikely. “I-It’s fine.” She said. “So, uh… what now, then? Do you have any more Upsize you can take?” 

Kaleb pursed his lips. “I don’t keep any spare pills at school.” He admitted quietly, shuddering again despite the course fabric around him. “With Upsize, you need to wait at least an hour after shrinking before you can take another dose. It’s supposed to give the medicine a chance to leave your system, kind of like a cool-down period.”

“Right, of course that’s a thing.” Brooke sighed. She tried racking her brain for an alternative solution. “Well then, can someone come get you? Surely Evie would. I bet she’s bored out of her mind back at the apartment without having me to spy on.” 

Instead of laughing at her poor attempt at a joke, Kaleb looked horrified. “I can’t just leave early!” He exclaimed. “I’ll miss maths next period. Mrs Crowley said she’d be giving out final exam tips today!” 

Brooke couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “You’re kidding.” She started, holding back a disbelieving laugh. Looking closer at his tiny, pleading features though, her smile faded. “You’re not kidding.” She deadpanned, groaning. “Come on, Kaleb. How the fuck are you supposed to come to class like this? You don’t even have any clothes!”

Kaleb’s cheeks heated up and he pulled the shirt sleeve a little tighter around himself as he was reminded of his current nudity. “I can get clothes.” He insisted, his usual confident demeanour returning in full force. “I have a spare set in my locker. Climbing gear, too.” 

Brooke would have face palmed herself if her hands weren’t still cupped around his tiny frame. She regarded him quizzically. “Well that’s great, but isn’t your whole thing supposed to be not getting seen by the rest of the class?” 

Kaleb shook his head. “I don’t have to actually come to class. You could just, y’know, let me off into the air vent and I can listen in from there.” He suggested, giving her a clumsy shrug from amongst the bundle of clothes. 

Brooke just stared down at him, completely lost for words. “You’re crazy.” She muttered. “You’re actually fucking crazy. You literally almost shrunk in front of our whole class, and now you want me to just let you go off into the walls so you can catch some stupid exam tips?” 

“Brooke.” 

She didn’t hear him, her voice rising in annoyance as she continued. “And then what? Am I supposed to just stay back and look for you after class, like that’s totally not suspicious at all?!”

“Brooke.” 

“Ugh!” She wanted so badly to bang her head into the cubicle door. “Why do I even get myself into these situations? I swear, ever since I found out about you and your stupid little secret, my life’s been a fucking disaster—!”

“BROOKE!”

She broke off with a start at his exclamation, caught off guard by how loud he’d managed to sound despite his obvious disadvantage in size. Brooke bit her lip, breathing heavily through her nose. She almost jumped when she felt a slight pressure on her thumb. Kaleb had reached out to touch it with his much smaller hand, stroking the digit in attempt to reassure her. “You good?” He asked. 

“Y-Yeah.” Brooke replied weakly, her mouth dry. She didn’t want to say anything but the feeling of his tiny hand on her finger felt so… weird. Kaleb almost never initiated physical contact with her when he was borrower-sized.  

He nodded, meeting her eyes again. “I’m sorry.” He said with obvious embarrassment. “I got a bit ahead of myself there. I guess I just thought you’d want me out of your hair so you could get back to class. If you can help me to my locker, I’ll call Evie to come pick me up, and I’ll just email Mrs Crowley about the exam later.” 

Brooke sighed at his words, a much simpler solution coming to mind that she was probably crazy for even suggesting. “Or you could just come with me.” She pointed out, the corner of her mouth twitching in amusement when he blinked up at her. “What? Did you forget we have the same maths class?” 

“Come… with you?” Kaleb repeated, looking thoroughly unconvinced. “As in, on your person? Where would I even go—?” His broke off, eyes trailing upwards to the chest pocket of her oversized denim jacket at the same time hers did. His face lost several shades of colour, and he shook his head firmly, despite knowing deep down that he might not have any say in the matter. “No way. No way. I’m not gonna sit in your pocket all day like some house pet, Brooke! That’s just… that’s just embarrassing!” 

The human girl smirked down at him. “Well, would it be any more embarrassing than being tiny and naked in the girl’s bathroom?” Her hand inched up to ruffle his hair teasingly. “I mean, unless you’re secretly a pervert?” 

Kaleb swiped at her already retreating digit. “I’m not a pervert!” He snapped, pointing his own diminutive finger up at her accusingly. “You brought me here, not the other way around!”  

“Relax, I’m just messing with you.” She giggled. “You’re always so easy to work up like this.” 

Kaleb bristled. “Yeah, well can you blame me? When I’m like this, there’s five extra feet of you to piss me off!”

“Fair point.” Brooke smirked. “So, what’s it gonna be then?” Her hands edged closer around him, as she impatiently tapped her foot against the tiles. “I can’t just keep sitting on the toilet for the rest of the day.”

Kaleb sighed, turning his gaze downwards in defeat. He had to admit she was right about that. Stalling was only prolonging what they both knew had to come next. “Fine. I’ll come to class with you.” He hesitated. “Just… can we please get my clothes first?” 

Brooke looked at him, shock evident on her face. Did he really believe that she wouldn’t let him get changed? It was humbling to think that with Kaleb like this, without his bag or climbing gear, he was essentially putting his life and his autonomy in her hands. Just knowing that made Brooke soften her voice ever so slightly. “Um, yeah, of course. There’s no way you’re coming with me in the nude. That’s fucked up.” 

Kaleb breathed a sigh of relief at her reassurance, offering a grateful smile. “Okay… Well, in the meantime, could you grab me a piece of toilet paper? To cover up, I mean.” 

Brooke blinked, glancing across at the roll beside her. Hesitantly, she tore off a small strip of toilet paper between her thumb and index finger and handed it down to him. Kaleb took it, ducking under his sleeve for a moment to tie it around his waist like a towel. He looked down at his handiwork, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’ll do.” He muttered to himself, letting the oversized shirt sleeve fall away so that he was standing at his full five-inch height in her cupped hands.  

Despite herself, Brooke almost did a double take when she saw his bare chest for the first time. There was no denying it; Kaleb was ripped. The thought had never occurred to her, but considering his active lifestyle, she really shouldn’t have been as caught off guard as she was. A little more of a tan, and he could’ve belonged in a body building magazine. She tore her eyes away before he caught her staring, but that didn’t stop her cheeks from heating up. 

She coughed. “Right. Ready to go then?”

“That depends.” Kaleb smirked knowingly. There was really no way he could have missed a stare that size. He took a bold step forward in her cupped hands and flexed his muscles tauntingly. “Did you want a closer look?” 

“W-What?”

“Who’s the pervert now, huh?” He teased, throwing the label right back at her.

“Shut up!” In that embarrassment-riddled moment, Brooke reacted in the only way she could think of. She poked Kaleb harshly in the chest. Like always, he staggered backwards with a yelp at the impact, but this time neither of them had taken proper stock of their surroundings. As if in slow-motion, Kaleb tripped over the folded clothing behind him, simultaneously jostling free the poorly secured knot holding up his toilet paper toga. All hope of modesty gone, he fell flat on his back with his legs gracelessly splayed… within full view of the human girl holding him. 

The two of them stared at each other in silent shock for several seconds, and Brooke wished she could bleach her eyeballs. Instead, she opted for the next best course of action.

“AHHHH!”

[sailorsenshishitposter]

Mechamaru x Reader

Warning for inappropriate/inaccurate use of drugs I guess? He steal morphine and gets high from it. Also evangelion and depression

Muta Kokichi:

You are a massive Evangelion fan, enjoy playing with puppets or just lay in bed all day.

First Date:

Your grandmother had fallen ill and had to be hospitalized a few months ago so you spent every weekend visiting her. You were so tired from studying that you failed to notice the room number. You walked in and were shocked to see a boy covered in bandages instead of your dear grandma. "Huh?"

You then noticed your mistake. "Shit. My bad, sorry. I thought this was nana's room. So... what are you in here for?" The boy looked at you but his expression screamed "dead inside". "I was born with glass bones and paper skin. It's so fragile that even moonlight burns it. Every morning, I break my upper legs, and every afternoon I break my left arm. At night, I lie awake in agony while it feels like needles are stabbing every pore in my body." 'This guy sounds like he's fun a parties'.

You sniffed the air and almost gagged. "You smell like mold. Why don't you take a bath?" He looked at you like the answer was obvious. "I was born without a right arm or anything below my knees. I have no sensation from the waist down. How can I possibly wash myself?" The boy appeared to be bathing in his own blood. "I think I'm just gonna call the nurse and tell her to give you a sponge bath." You then ran out of the room. "Well that was awkward!"

It was now a week later and you went to visit your elderly grandmother again. "I hope the old folks will enjoy the show I'm putting on!" You went through your bag and checked to see if it was there. You then held on to a small wooden puppet. "All right, everything's good. Let's go!" You walked in and noticed your dear grandmother in the audience. "I hope she likes this over playing bingo all the time..."

You then noticed a familiar face. It was that boy again. It seems that a nurse had propped him up in a wheelchair and forced him to "enjoy" something for once. He was glaring daggers at you. You gulped. This was going to be a long day.

Finally your show came to an end and you wiped the sweat from your brow. "He's creeping me out but at least he doesn't stink anymore!" You breathed a sigh of relief and went to exit when your grandmother surprised you. "Oh, hi nana. Did you like the show?" The two of you chatted and she eventually asked if the puppet could stay at the hospital. You agreed since you thought it would help their morale.

Over the next few weeks you began to notice some changes. Maybe it was just your imagination but we're things being moved out of place? Your grandmother told you stories about how the hospital staff believed that there was a ghost. It turns out items were frequently going missing and a culprit was yet to be caught.

"########, be a dear and ask if I can have some pain killers." You called a nurse but it turns out that their supply was low due to a shortage so you would just have to wait. Grandma only had a migraine so there wasn't any need to give her something insanely strong. You were just going to have to buy some Advil.

"Man, this sucks-" you were cut off as you soon fell over. "What the-?" It turns out that you had tripped on an empty syringe. You saw some scattered pills and followed them like this was some sort of insane trail and the source led to one room. "No fucking way! It can't be him!" You opened the door and were greeted by the sight of the boy getting high on morphine.

"So you're the thief!" It was then that he noticed you. "Huh?" He was smoking a fat blunt and eating Doritos. How the hell did he get all of this? It was then that you noticed your puppet in his lap. "How are you controlling it!?" He looked towards you and then the puppet. "You mean Mechamaru?" Did this guy seriously just name a doll after some sort of robot cartoon?

"Yes, that!" The boy sighed. "Okay but you have to promise not to tell anyone..." It turns out that his name was Kokichi and that he had some sort of strange ability that let him be able to control puppets? You two quickly became friends and you gave him your tablet just to show him the puppet master franchise.

"Those were awful. I'm never letting you pick again!" He then noticed a certain anime. "Hey, let's watch this next." Kokichi was now hooked on Neon Genesis Evangelion. He was a Rei stan, probably due to the fact that she's usually in the infirmary or her body is falling apart. "########, one day we'll pilot a giant eva and fly to the moon!" You laughed and ruffled his hair. "That's just the weed talking." You didn't know it but he really was working on creating a giant mech.

It was a week later and you still didn't show up. Kokichi looked around and called for a doctor. "Have you seen ########!?" The doctor was confused. "Who?" He groaned. " ########! They visit every weekend!" The doctor put his hand on his shoulder. "Mr. Muta, you need to relax. You're only going to make your injuries worse!"

"To hell with that! Where is ########!?" The doctor sighed. "No one with that name has visited the hospital. I know this must be upsetting but you just recently came out of a coma. I'm sorry. You must have dreamt it. I'll give you some time to yourself." Kokichi was now sobbing. "It all returns to nothing.. It just keeps tumbling down, TUMBLING DOWN, TUMBLING DOOOOOOOWWWWWWNNNN!!!"

The heart monitor kept skipping until there was a flatline. The boy died of a broken heart. In came a very happy Mahito. It turns out that he had blackmailed the doctor into gaslighting his patient. "I should do this more often!" He then transformed into the girl Kokichi had fallen in love with. In this form, Mahito began to sing.

"You can sail the seven seas and find love is a place you'll never see. Passing you like a summer breeze, you feel life has no other reason to be. You can wait a million years and find that heavens too far away from you. Love's just a thing others do. What is love til it comes home to you?"

[starg1rlie]

𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 ㅤㅤPROLOGUE: The Baby | (MLIST)

⟡ rating. slight romance + angst ( adolescent audience )

⟡ summary. ( the re-written version of "better late than never" is finally here! i know some people have asked about it, since i've deleted it but it's BACK NOW!! ) not all fairy tales end in a happily-ever-after. take (Y/N) and ajax for example; they had the love story of a lifetime and yet it's now all water under the bridge. ten years after the two of them split up, it was suggested that (Y/N) spend a summer vacation over in snezhnaya to give their son and the father some time to bond together and enjoy a relaxing break. however, that's easier said than done.

notes. you have no idea how long this post has been sitting in my drafts, oml. hey, yep, this is leo here, formerly known online as tarluscious (or, leo, as my moots know me), here to talk a bit about the remake of this delightful series. ever since i started publishing more and more chapters of this series back when it was still a "fly by the seat of my pants" project, i wasn't happy with the final results. i mean, hell, who's ever happy with the first attempt? and i've been meaning to re-write this series for so long, but i never found the time to. when i took my hiatus a couple of months ago, i was a little sad that i wouldn't get the chance to write BLTN over again. however, my friend, who now runs this blog (hyokkun) with me, suggested that they might re-write it, and we came to a happy conclusion that the both of us should work on this project together. so here we are, with the prologue. yayy. just wanted to say that what this means is, hyokkun has added their own inputs into this series, while i, leo, am the main author of it. so, all that being said, i hope you thoroughly enjoy this re-written version. please note that some things may be different from the last time you've read this series, and that's because changes has been made to fit the new plot accordingly. reblogs and likes are appreciated ! | wc. 1,542 words ( 8,566 characters )

⟡ feat. childe / tartaglia x female! reader ( she / her pronouns are used )

ㅤㅤA cry split through the peaceful silence of the hospital. A baby, swaddled in warm, cuddly blankets had begun wailing, even though he was cradled within the arms of his mother. He kept bawling, even as the mother hummed a lullaby, even as she rocked him back and forth in her arms, even as she cupped one side of his delicate face and whispered 'It's going to be okay' over and over again.

ㅤㅤA new wave of sickness passed over (Y/N) as she stared down at her stomach, imagining what it would be like bigger, pondering over the process it takes for a baby to develop within her. It both simultaneously intrigued and terrfied her. She couldn't imagine popping out a baby from her unmentionables, let alone having it stuck in her womb for months. Yet as she began to wonder, a new question came into light: would she give up this baby? Could she?

ㅤㅤPeople say that you don't really have a choice when you're young; no one's capable of raising a child when they're barely just a young adult, and yet, she could name a few people she knew right off the bat who were doing just fine with parenting. But the real question was if she was ready for this. Be it ready to give it up or ready to endure the consequences, it didn't matter. She just had to know for sure if she was ready.

ㅤㅤShe still remembered the conversation that had went down only a few weeks ago. She refers to it as a 'discussion', but really, it was a full-out argument....A migraine had formed underneath her temple and had buried its heels in deep, causing a resonating pounding to echo within her head, messing with her already tangled up thoughts. And yet, that day's memories remained untouched. If anything, it was tugged free of the mess and pulled into the light.

ㅤㅤ"What the fuck? What the fuck?"

ㅤㅤ"Saying 'what the fuck' over and over again isn't going to make the situation anymore better than it already is, Ajax," (Y/N) interrupted, breathing out a slightly exasperated sigh. She'd been scared out of mind about telling her boyfriend about the news and this was exactly why: he'd take it badly. He always took life-changing news badly, unless it involved travelling, free food, or money. She'd grown used to his childish behaviour ever since the two started going out, but right now was not the time to act like a child.

ㅤㅤ"Then what will make this better? Huh? Please elaborate on that for me," Ajax replied sarcastically, throwing his hands up in the air. He'd been pacing for the past five minutes since (Y/N) had spilled the beans about her pregnancy. Anymore pacing and he'd pace a trench right through their apartment floor. "Because I really don't understand how anything can make this better."

ㅤㅤ"Oh, I don't know, maybe the fact that you're going to be a father? Haven't you been going on and on about wanting to have a son one day?" (Y/N) retorted, patience fizzling.

ㅤㅤ"When I'm thirty, not twenty-four!"

ㅤㅤ"What's a few years early? If anything, you'd get your dream quicker," she mumbled under her breath, absentmindedly flipping through the channels on the cable.

ㅤㅤAjax leapt forward and snatched the remote out of her hands, slamming it roughly onto the glossy surface of their coffee table, one that he'd insisted he put together himself, even though the table had come from IKEA, and he knew nothing on how to read instructions in Swedish. That little memory caused a tiny pang to go through her heart, enough to make it ache just a little bit. Please, she prayed, please let us get through this together.

ㅤㅤ"You're not listening! Do you honestly think that I'm ready for this? That you're ready for this? We're still in college for God's sake, do you expect us to be whizzes at parenthood?"

ㅤㅤ(Y/N) barely managed to withhold a snort at his sarcasm, but politely shook her head. She knew deep down inside that she wasn't ready to be a mother, let alone have a child at such a young age. What would her friends think? What would her parents think?

ㅤㅤ"What, then, I 'spose you expect us to waltz right in and get comfortable in our positions as parents, right? We'll be fine, so long as we manage to balance a baby into our already hectic and crazy lives, right? Just plop it right in between work and college and paying bills, hm?"

ㅤㅤ"Right," she repeated.

ㅤㅤAjax paused his pacing for a moment. "Do you understand the concept of sarcasm?" he asked incredulously.

ㅤㅤ(Y/N) went silent, seemingly contemplating whether she'd been too hasty to cast in her answer earlier.

ㅤㅤ"Whatever. It doesn't matter." His jaw tensed and for a moment, he looked as though he might punch something. Not (Y/N), heavens no, but something. Possibly the fridge (poor thing; it never did anything to deserve this sort of abuse). "What matters is that you're pregnant and we're still in college. We're students, we can barely make it past out deadlines, let alone manage a child." He sounded almost tired, and for the first time in a while, she just now noticed the bags under his eyes, and the tired croak to his voice, taking the place of the usual charming lilt he normally had. How many times had she come home from her part-time job at the laundromat to see him passed out on the exact same coffee table they were currently in front of, drooling all over his calculus homework? How many times had she come back from her lectures to find a pristine sink and an empty fridge? Ajax was incredibly vain and conscious about his self-image, that he took great lengths to make himself look presentable each day. But ever since his senior year in college started, his schedue started going downhill and he never had the time to do any of the things he normally did to take care of his body. He hadn't eaten proper food for days, and has been liviing off of coffee (and her fancy vanilla oatmilk creamer) and Doritos for God knows how long.

ㅤㅤ"What are we going to do?" (Y/N) asked finally, voice timid and quiet, as if anything louder might break the fragility of this scene.

ㅤㅤWhen Ajax looked up, she had expected his face to be sad, almost regretful for saying such things about the situation, but instead she found his gaze hard and penetrating, almost menacing. "We can't look after a baby right now, (Y/N), you know that."

ㅤㅤAnd the truth was, she did know it. She just chose not to believe it. But the way he worded it, the way he said it, seemed to hint at something. Something that made waves of nausea roll through the pits of her stomach.

ㅤㅤ"You're not suggesting...."

ㅤㅤ"An abortion," Ajax finished quietly, gaze trained on a coffee stain on the carpet.

ㅤㅤ"Ajax, no. No. We can't give the baby up before we've even tried. That's just cruel. This is your child, possibly the son you said you wanted, and you're just going to throw him away? Let him die before he gets a chance to play on a soccer team, like you did? Before he even gets a chance to see the two people who made him?" Your voice broke at those last few words and before you knew it, tears were streaming down your face in thick, wet trails. "You might be giving up on him, but I'm never letting go."

ㅤㅤAjax inhaled sharply, air hissing through clenched teeth as he breathed out. "We aren't ready for this, (Y/N)."

ㅤㅤ She knew he was right. She knew it in her heart and in her brain. But some part of her wanted to keep this unborn baby that was developing within her stomach right now. Some part of her wanted to know the happiness of being a parent, a mother.

ㅤㅤShe didn't want to follow through with this. She didn't want to let the baby die. And yet...

ㅤㅤ"Miss (L/N)? You can come in now. Dr. Li's ready for you," a voice called, interrupting (Y/N)'s train of thought. She looked up, one hand resting on her tummy, the other clenched around a cell phone. The screen was still on, a barrage of messages (most likely from her family and friends) lighting up the screen with soft 'pings'.

ㅤㅤShe breathed in deeply, exhaling slowly, a breathing trick she'd learned from online to calm her nerves down.

ㅤㅤFinally, she spoke.

ㅤㅤ"Ah, sorry. I'm afraid I've changed my mind. If it's alright with you, I'll be canceling my appointment."

ㅤㅤThe nurse hesitated for a moment before nodding along. She obviously was not paid enough to barge into patients' lives, so she (wisely) kept her nose in her own business. "Of course, miss. I'll let him know you'll be leaving. Have a lovely rest of your day."

ㅤㅤ(Y/N) nodded along before waddling out of the waiting room, feeling giddy and deliriously light from the weight that had just been lifted from her shoulders. Ajax would be upset over this, yes, but it would be worth it. She could feel it in her bones.

📮 tagging. @kiryoutann, @ajaxstar, @mobiussdarling, @samarill, @dinolvrrr, @messyserver, @xxfrostiee, @enviouspeanut, @ehddsnys, @maaarshieee, @dazaiscum, @mochicurls21, @shinobuko, @iiyumii, @meiraloves2dmen, @retiredmommylover, @electronicphilosopherflower. if your user is highlighted in BOLD that means your current URL does not match the one you inputted in the form. fill out this form if you want to be tagged

[artisttrova]

Guess who wanted to upload the first two chapters of one fic and work on the one I've already teased? And guess who did neither because they've got a debilitating migraine?

Yup, yours faithful

So because of this, I'm actually gonna post the first chapter here in it's entirety cause fuck it! We ball.

From the fic with a work title "Broken Nest" (I've rewritten it dozens of time and I don't care anymore if the language is shit, neither do i care about any possible grammar mistakes). This is a modern AU

The people sitting around the table sighed in joy and surprise. A second later, Sakura was surrounded by her girlfriends, all squealing in joy simultaneously, forming a very merry cacophony of sounds. Sasuke was trying his hardest not to get suffocated in his friends' arms. Naruto and Rock Lee even started crying. A moment later, Sakura's tearful mother trapped her in a bone-crashing hug, repeating time and time again how happy she was to hear the news, while her father patted Sasuke on the back and started to talk about how he would be a ‘proper’ father to him. Sasuke had to stop him from speaking as the man was getting carried away quickly.

Orochimaru was standing not far away from everyone, twirling a soda can in their hands. They heard Sasuke softly but firmly tell Kizashi that he had a parent and scoffed.

Orochimaru only rolled their eyes when they next heard Mebuki quietly say "But that freak didn't even come up to congratulate you" followed by a louder "Mom, don't say that...I'll explain" from Sakura.

They kept their silence. They would surely be offended, too, if anyone reacted to the news of their children's firstborn in the way they did. Much less the ‘parent' of their daughter's husband.

Thankfully, no one really cared about their presence, and the situation fizzled down as fast as it came up. When everyone had calmed down a bit and scattered in small groups again to discuss the baby boom that had recently hit the town, Sasuke slipped away from everyone, approaching Orochimaru, all while Sakura took her parents to another room to talk.

"Is everything all right? " Sasuke asked quietly.

"Don't worry about me, it’s your day. Congratulations again on the new addition to the family." They smiled amicably as they looked around the room. "I thought surely people would figure out I knew ahead of time, but it seems like Sakura’s mom took it to heart."

Even standing a good few feet away from the entrance to the guest bedroom, both Sasuke and Orochimaru could hear Mebuki and Kizashi berating Sakura on the fact they didn’t learn the news first.

"She'll have to deal with them, they're her tribe. We had good reasons.” Sasuke answered, seemingly unbothered by the sounds of his enraged inlaws. "You know I just didn't want to make the news a surprise to you due to... everything."

Orochimaru sighed with a smile, allowing themselves a second of proud arrogance that they had raised Sasuke quite well. As well a deeply traumatized, orphaned teenager could be raised. They sipped the soda, grimacing at how overly sweet it was.

"I'm happy for you, Sasuke." They looked at the boy and put a hand on his shoulder. "Even if it doesn't seem like it.”

"I know." He smiled awkwardly. He was still not used to physical touch from anyone, but his wife. Sakura just seemed a weird exception from most of his weird societal deficiencies. Well, she and Naruto.

Both Mebuki and Kizashi stormed out of the room, glancing daggers at Orochimaru. Sakura followed, only sheepishly smiling at her husband.

"At least you only have me to deal with." Orochimaru chuckled, as they looked at Sasuke.

They tried to play their feelings off as a joke but didn't succeed much. The tin can crumpled slightly under their fingers.

“I take it, he keeps acting like an idiot?" Tilted his head Sasuke, noticing the forced nonchalance.

"Let's not talk about that, please."

"He's no stranger to me either. I want to know." He sighed. "Sakura says he quit not too long ago..."

"Yeah." They nodded."As far as I know, he's basically out of work now. So much for all the talk about the need for a doctor at the orphanage..."

"Does he even visit?" Sasuke frowned.

"He still comes once a week and takes Log somewhere fun. We don't talk outside of that arrangement. And by that I mean I refuse to talk to him." They grimaced as the girls laughed again as their husbands approached the group. Some leaned forward, kissing their wives on the forehead or temple, and some hugged. Sasuke felt a squeeze on his shoulder.

"It's been six months, right? And things are not moving in any direction, as it seems." Sasuke got their attention again.

"I guess. He's been acting weird lately, but it doesn't mean much to me anymore.” They set the empty can on the table. "I don't know where to throw it, is that okay if I leave it here?"

"We'll clean it up, no big deal." Sasuke waved his only hand, "Can you elaborate on the weirdness?"

"This is not the best place or time for such talk." Orochimaru turned away from the party completely, deciding not to annoy themselves any further, and crossed their arms, "Recently he's just been nagging me about allowing Log to stay at their place. All the while refusing to speak about the divorce and figuring out the visitation times. He's dragging this whole process out, even though he started it. He won't even allow my lawyer to go through his documents... Guess he's just scared I'd take sole custody, which I never even intended."

“I don't think this is about custody at all,” Sasuke mumbled.

“Well if he's trying to win me over by being annoying, he's not doing a good job.”

"Why not allow him to take Log for a couple of days anyway?" Sasuke shrugged. "From what I know, he's a great dad."

"Yeah, but he lives with Urushi, and from the rumors that reach me from the orphanage, they haven't done anything, but drink and go clubbing since Kabuto packed up his things and left our...I mean my house. I refuse to put my child in these conditions."

"I understand." Nodded Sasuke.

Orochimaru glanced nervously at their watch. They were beginning to notice people's slanted glances at themselves a little more than usual. Their sour face stood out a little too much amid everyone's joy.

"I have to go." They muttered, "Log is home all alone, and... I don't want to spoil your party."

"You're not gonna spoil anything." Sasuke looked around, causing several pairs of eyes to immediately turn away from Orochimaru. "This is an important moment in my life. I couldn't imagine not sharing it with my parent."

Orochimaru smiled as they looked into Sasuke's eyes. When did he become so tall and grown up? He was almost half a head taller than they were now, if not more. They couldn’t fully comprehend how he'd once been a small, malnourished boy who lunged at their cooking like a hungry animal. They were never good at cooking. Even now that they have gotten better at it, Log still refuses to eat almost everything they make. Sasuke was just an unfortunate little thing when they decided to take him in and now, there he was, with his own house and a family, still standoffish as ever, but so grown up and matured.

"I'm not your parent, I'm your guardian. You have a real family."

"Oh, come on." Sasuke waved his hand. "We both know that Itachi can hate you all he wants, but he was a juvenile delinquent and that's why he lost custody of me. You, on the other hand, at least tried to give me a good life and continue to help to this day. You are as much family to me as he is.”

They looked away a little embarrassed, hiding a smile.

"Thank you. But I still need to get home. I'm scared Log will freak out. There was a storm on the forecast." They tucked a strand of hair behind their ear.

"Okay." Sasuke nodded. "Sakura really wanted to give you some food to go, so…"

Orochimaru nodded and headed for the exit. “I'll wait at the porch.”

They saw no point in saying goodbye to anyone. No one but Sasuke and Sakura even said hello to them. However, the click of their heels before they stepped out onto the porch let everyone know that they were leaving.

Orochimaru took out a cigarette and lit it a little further away from the entrance. They'd given up cigarettes completely during the pregnancy and after Log was born, but lately... They've been craving a cigarette. Still, they never smoked in the car or at home, not wanting their son to inhale the smoke or smell, but smoking near the gas station on their way home or near a grocery store was for now their favorite part of the day by a long shot.

Orochimaru looked at the sky. Behind the painfully similar houses in this painfully plain neighborhood, all painted in cheery pastel colors, the gray, cloudy sky seemed even gloomier.

They sighed, remembering how they and Kabuto used to sit together in the pillow house with Log, with a flashlight and a book while a storm raged outside the window.

Log's fear of thunder was a surprising development for the family. He had been born in such weather that it seemed he shouldn't have been afraid of thunder. They even had a blackout in the middle of labor, the storm was so vicious they had to deliver a child in the candlelight. Yet, it was nonetheless endearing to help him through his fear. Something about being the source of comfort for their little guy was endlessly heartwarming.

They sighed, walked over to their car, pulled out an ashtray, and tossed the cigarette bud in it after extinguishing it. They wouldn’t litter at their son’s house.

"Ah, there you are! " Sakura materialized behind them, holding several bags. "I've packed you some snacks to go! There's soda, chips, two containers of mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, fried sausages, pork chops, salad..."

"Sakura, how much do you think me and Log are eating?" Orochimaru laughed.

"Don't interrupt me! "Sakura exhaled loudly through her nostrils. Orochimaru saw Sasuke behind her back, visually signaling them not to argue. "So, there's also, uh..."

"Yogurts." Sasuke helped her.

"Yes! Yogurt. My mom got me a yogurt maker and thought maybe Log would like it. He doesn't have a lactose problem, does he?"

"No, he likes yogurt." Orochimaru smiled.

"Great! " Sakura cheered. "There's also crackers and a couple of pieces of cake. Mom brought so much food, I didn't know what to do with it. I've done a lot of cooking myself...at least take this and eat it with Log, I know you don't like cooking. I’d feel better if you ended up throwing it away, rather than me, 'cause, you know, I see mom so rarely and I adore her cooking…"

"Thank you, honey." They took the bags from her hands and stacked them on the passenger seat after turning around and hugging her. "Congratulations again. I can't wait to see you as a mother, Sakura, I think you'll fit the role very well.”

"Thanks! " She laughed, taking a step back from them and folding her palms together, "I'm so glad we moved closer to you now. My parents definitely won't be moving out of their backwaters any time soon, and I'm so glad I can at least consult with you during the pregnancy."

"Honey, call and text me with anything you have, I know how much pregnancy fuels paranoia, and I'll always help you with anything."

Sakura looked at them, got some air into her chest, and threw herself at them, folding her hands around their shoulders again. Orochimaru smiled as they hugged her, catching Sasuke's pleased look.

"I'm so glad you and I have found common ground." She sighed and pulled away. "The beginning of our relationship was a disaster. "

"You two were just too young," Orochimaru laughed. "Right, Sasuke? Who brings a bride into the house at 16, huh?"

"We didn't get married at 16, didn’t we?" Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"I can see why you were so skeptical of me back then." Sakura turned to Sasuke, "We were… young."

“Well.” Orochimaru walked to the driver's door. “That was a temporary flaw.”

The drive from the Uchichas' house took less than ten minutes. Orochimaru tried to concentrate on the road, but somehow, their thoughts kept returning to tonight's party. How sad Sakura looked the night before when they admitted that they couldn't look at the pictures of their wedding anymore. How Sasuke jokingly promised to "talk to Kabuto with his fists" if he didn't come to his senses and act like a normal father. How Sasuke and Sakura worried about their journey home and asked them to text them as soon as they arrived. They knew they started showing more and more obvious signs. They knew people could see the weight of their situation affecting them.

Their thoughts, one way or another, came down to Kabuto.

All the narrow streets with cute shops they passed held so many memories. The bakery where Kabuto always ordered cakes for their son's birthday. The café where they went for coffee every Sunday, even before their child was born. They couldn’t help, but get choked up, thinking how a few years later, hot chocolate and éclairs have been added to their usual Sunday order. They shook their head, trying once again to think only of the road.

The yellow leaves falling from the trees were sticking to the windshield and getting stuck in the. Who thought planting so many trees was a good idea?

"How dare they not ask you in advance." Kabuto's voice sounded in their head. They must have repeated that dialog a thousand times. For some reason, the medic liked trees.

Suddenly, something black ran out into the road. Orochimaru hit the brakes, holding their breath in surprise. They jumped out of the door, walking forward to see what was it they almost hit. There was a very scared black kitten sitting a few centimeters away from the car.

"Why did you run out into the road, you silly?" They picked up the kitten and moved it to the lawn next to the sidewalk. As they approached the car, a drop of water hit them on the nose. They sighed.

The rest of the way was much calmer. However, there was still this stupid pain in her ribs they felt whenever they were in this part of town. This stupid longing for what once was ordinary. By the time they pulled into the parking lot next to the house, it was pouring.

They didn't feel like going to meet their child while they were still shaken up. They exhaled and leaned back in the driver's seat, trying to push themselves to relax.

They didn't even want to look in the direction of their house. They remembered how much happiness and love the building had held and how much misery it had brought them now. They remembered how they and Kabuto had just bought this house, how they had made plans for renovations, and chosen wallpapers and flooring. How Sasuke, who was already living apart from them, had scoffed at the pastel purple colors that had been chosen for the interior of the house and how Kabuto had always argued with him for the same reason. How they had painted the walls in the nursery together, but Kabuto had been constantly distracted by hugging and kissing them, holding their still round belly. How they arranged the pictures, arguing in animated whispers about where their wedding photo would look best, while Log slept quietly in Kabuto's arms.

They hated going back to the house that smelled of dust and delivery food, remembering how they'd always eaten dinner together before, the three of them, and how Kabuto had enjoyed cooking and discussing the week's menu with them. Hated sleeping in a bed where the fucking memory foam mattress still couldn't seem to forget the outline of the other person. They hated how Log was constantly worried, now that his routine was disrupted, how he lost focus in school because of it, and the way all the teachers looked at them as they signed the paperwork to homeschool the boy. They wanted to scream when their sweet son whispered to them about his daddy and whether he would be living with them again for the first time. They hated that they couldn’t possibly tell him the answer.

They opened their eyes, only now realizing that tears had been streaming down their face all along. Thunder rumbled in the distance, and at the same moment, they slammed their fists exhaustively against the steering wheel.

How could he do this? How could he just leave everything behind? How could he leave the two of them?

They drew air into their chest, feeling like it was becoming harder to breathe. Their throat felt like it was being squeezed.

Kabuto had always been there for them. He was there for them when their arms stopped working because of a back injury. He spent hours doing exercises with them, patiently enduring their tantrums of fear and hopelessness. Had it not been for his persistence, they would probably still not have regained mobility in their fingers. He had been involved in the delivery of their child himself and was attending to their every need for months before the birth as if they were made of porcelain. He had stayed up nights and nights in a row, sitting with Log when he was sick. He had comforted them when Log had fallen face-first onto a piece of glass on a walk and then explained to Log that his scar wasn't scary when the kids on the playground started refusing to play with him.

He'd taken up so much space in their lives, and now it was as if there was no life left.

Now he was finding it difficult to maintain life with them. Now he suddenly needed "time apart" and "to feel young and alive again." At least that's what he said. Orochimaru was sure he just wanted to find someone younger and start a family with them.

They desperately wanted a second child, but nothing worked. The doctors just shrugged, there was nothing wrong with either of them, as it seemed. Orochimaru hadn't taken testosterone long enough to get pregnant, not to mention that they had never taken high doses. Their first child had even been conceived without stopping the use of hormones. Kabuto was also healthy. Nothing indicated what could have been the problem.

They were just unlucky.

At least according to the doctors.

Though Orochimaru certainly blamed themselves and only themselves. They were born with a defect and only exacerbated their condition with hormones.

Kabuto denied it, but how could he deny the obvious?

They hadn't been able to get pregnant for a year before Kabuto left.

Not counting a few miscarriages, of course. Most of them, very early. Except for the last one.

It ruined them both altogether, after which they decided to stop trying. For their good.

Sasuke had called specifically, warning them about the nature of their party tonight. He knew they were still sore about the topic, and even Sakura agreed with his decision to warn Orochimaru. Still, they had come after all. Decided to be with their child at such an important moment, even though it ended up as Sasuke thought it would. With a meltdown in the car.

They were wiping their face from tears when suddenly they heard a quiet banging on the car door. They turned their head sharply, seeing a yellow child's umbrella outside the window. Immediately they opened the door.

"Log? Why are you outside?" They asked fearfully.

The boy stood there, sniffling, tears streaming down his face. He was in his favorite blue dinosaur pajamas and rubber boots, holding tightly to the handle of his umbrella. Outside, lightning flashed and thunder rumbled.

The boy couldn't squeeze out a word, clutching the umbrella even tighter in his hands as thunder rumbled behind him.

Orochimaru jumped out of the car and scooped the child into their arms. Quickly grabbing the bags from the passenger seat, they slammed the car door shut and pressed the button on the keys, setting the car on alarm.

They practically ran into the house, dropping the packages on the floor at the entrance as they went and setting the crying child on the floor.

"Honey, why did you go out in the rain? Were you so afraid of the storm?" They began to talk, wiping tears from Log's chubby cheeks. He just shook his head.

"I was afraid..." The boy was still choking back tears. "For you."

Orochimaru sighed and sat down on the floor in front of the boy. Log squelched his nose and wiped his tears with his hands, clearly scared out of his mind, struggling to cope with his emotions. They reached forward with their hands.

"Come here, sweetheart." They smiled, the way they only smiled at their son. Log was always easily reassured by their soft, friendly smiles. The boy took a step forward and fell into their arms, and they scooped him up immediately. Log buried his face in their wet coat, gripping the fabric tightly with his hands, and they placed their palms on his hair, gently stroking the blond strands. "It's okay, baby, it's okay. Mommy's here for you now. Sorry it took me so long, I'm just a little tired.”

"Have you been crying?" The boy asked, snuggling against their chest as they pulled off his rubber boots.

"No, what are you, I just... "Their gaze met their son's. They realized they didn't want to lie to him anymore. "Yes. I was crying."

"Why?" Log sniffed.

Orochimaru looked at their son, struggling to form an answer. They’d prefer not to answer at all.

In general, Log was difficult to talk to. Long before he and Kabuto broke up when they were still together but already were visibly growing apart, Log had begun to withdraw into himself. Less talking, less playing, less socializing with the kids. But after they broke up, something in him finally broke. One-word sentences and a distant expression became the norm. His therapist argued that it should have passed with time, that he'd just taken the breakup to heart…

It's been half a year. Just recently, he had started smiling again, talking to other children on walks, clapping his hands, and jumping up and down when he was happy. Barely so, but still, it was progress. But Kabuto just had to ruin it, to ask to visit him more and disturb his routine. Orochimaru could not say no. But they could see that their son had begun to regress. The mood swings and unreasonable hopes for his father's return were not good for him.

It was just painful.

"Is it because of Daddy?" The boy asked them quietly.

"Yeah." Orochimaru sighed, mentally berating themselves for allowing themselves to act like that in front of a child. His and Kabuto's problems weren't about their son. Shouldn't have been his burden. They'd tried so hard to keep him from the bitterness of realizing their family was crumbling... but they couldn't.

Log got to his feet, stepping back, giving Orochimaru a strangely thoughtful look.

"I miss daddy, too."

Orochimaru swallowed the lump in their throat and averted their gaze. They got to their feet, pulling off their high-heeled shoes. Log looked at them attentively. They couldn’t bear talking about his father. Not to him at least.

"Aunt Sakura sent over a lot of goodies," They spoke up, picking up the bags, and putting on a cheerful appearance again. "What do you want for dinner? There's mashed potatoes, mac and cheese..."

"Is it my fault Daddy's not coming back?" Log suddenly asked.

Orochimaru froze with the bags in their hands. The boy looked at them with his childishly sincere big eyes, now filled with a sadness that was so inappropriate for his sweet face. They walked past him, putting the bags on the table. They had to be silent for a second, gathering their thoughts so they wouldn't just start crying in front of him again. He shouldn't feel this way. No child deserves this.

"No, honey. Daddy loves you. He loves you very much." They saw the boy look at them with a silent question in his eyes.

Why.

"It's just..." They pulled out a container of sausage. "Daddy doesn't love me anymore. He wants to try living without me around. That's why he doesn't come often."

Tears treacherously rolled down their cheeks. Log immediately ran to them, hugging their legs. He just couldn't reach any higher. They reached lower, picking him up in their arms and kissing his cheek, smiling sadly.

"It happens." They began. "Adults are very stupid and rarely know what they want. Your dad thought he was happy, but he realized he wasn't. Now Daddy looks for happiness in other people and other things. But you, honey, will always be his happiness, as you'll always be mine too."

"Why aren't you his happiness anymore? " Log tried to repeat the gesture that Orochimaru was making, awkwardly brushing the tears away from their cheeks, causing them to start smiling.

"I don't fully know myself. I'm not sure your dad knows the answer either. He just feels that way." Orochimaru sighed and put Log down on the ground. They looked at the bags. "Shall we have cake for dinner tonight?"

"Yes!" The boy was immediately enthusiastic.

"Great, it's decided! " Orochimaru clapped their hands. ”Now you and I are going to wash up, get changed, and go watch Bluey and eat cake, right?"

Log started jumping in place from excitement, upon hearing that he was also going to be allowed to watch TV while he ate. That was normally strictly forbidden.

"Well, go to the bathroom and wash your hands and face, I'll get you some clean pajamas and come over, okay?"

The boy nodded cheerfully and ran to the bathroom.

"Don't run! You'll slip!" Orochimaru shouted back at him and sighed.

They looked at their reflection in the mirror, hanging at the entrance of the house, not that far from the kitchen, and shook their head.

They should also wash their face.

[theygender]

Been going through it for over a month now and let me tell you. I'm not having a good time

Early-mid July a heat wave knocked out our AC and me, my partner, and the cats were stuck in an apartment with temps in the high 80s for about two days

I got some minor heat sickness and my cat started coughing

Heat sickness kicked off my IBS which dehydrated me and eventually led to migraines which all lasted for over a week after the heat wave ended

Took my cat to the vet (while still dealing with sickness + migraines) and found out she probably has asthma which was set off by the heat. They gave her a steroid shot

Went to the doctor for my own sickness and decided to ask about my severely ingrown toenail at the same time. I'm told I need toe surgery

Got toe surgery the very next day and it turns out recovering from toe surgery sucks

Cat has stopped coughing but is instead having intense sneezing fits now and pawing at her nose constantly, clearly much sicker

Took her back to the vet (while still recovering from toe surgery) and learned that cats just inherently have dormant hepatitis, and stressful situations/other illnesses can cause a flare up which leads to an upper respiratory infection

They prescribe nose drops + medicine treats for me to give to her 3-4 times a day. Surprisingly (/s), she hates the nose drops

File claims for both of those appointments + tests + medicine with my pet insurance

Endometriosis sees me dealing with all this and as a disorder that's made worse with stress it decides to join in on the action. It resurrects my period from the grave that my meds dug for it over two years ago

In case that wasn't bad enough, it also gives me a yeast infection. I go to the doctor and get medicine for it

As soon as the yeast infection symptoms start to go away they're replaced with what seems to be UTI symptoms. UTIs generally devolve very quickly into non-stop vomiting for me. I'm living in fear until I can get a test done

(UPDATE: The tests don't work when you're on your period apparently. Guess I gotta go back to the doctor again before I can get any answers)

I haven't even looked at the bills for my own medical tests or the toe surgery yet and frankly I'm scared to. At least I should be getting some money back from my pet insurance claim

Pet insurance tells me that they won't pay out my claim until I provide proof that the pet insurance policy I had with a previous company over FIVE YEARS AGO was canceled. I don't keep records longer than five years. I don't even remember the name of the company

All of my coworkers got laid off last week so I'm sad and lonely at work now and I have to adjust to a new work environment during all of this and I can't really take much time off anymore

I'm still sick and worried I'll get sicker but I don't know how to ask my new boss "hey what should I do if I hypothetically start projectile vomiting tomorrow" without it sounding suspicious

With all this other stuff going on, my college semester also started back up TODAY

I got a notification from my school that I have over $5000 due bc the company that pays for my tuition as part of my employee benefits just. Didn't pay off my spring semester it seems. So now I gotta figure that out

Somewhere in the middle of this I had some sort of mental breakdown and discovered that my normal-level nervous anxiety has evolved into critical-level constant terror anxiety

Reached out to my mom who had anxiety so bad when my brother and I were growing up that it played a large part in ruining our childhoods. She confirmed that it sounds like what she has

It started when she was just a few years older than me and she still has it at the age of 55. Normal anxiety meds don't work for it. I may have to convince my psychiatrist to prescribe me narcotics now if I ever want to go back to normal again

This has all been so much. Like can I PLEASE just get a fucking break here 😭

[onewomancitadel]

A smattering of general updates:

I played Tears of the Kingdom. I didn't really enjoy it. I understand why it was popular though; I'm just not the demographic for these types of video games anymore. I didn't find it creatively rewarding and after a time I sat there thinking 'I would rather be writing right now', and since then I have learnt that writing is made easier by doing things which are not writing, because it makes me miss it. My dad also doesn't really like it but for some reason has played hundreds of hours in it. I don't know either - I think he will take anything called Zelda at this point.

I spectated the Doctor Who David Tennant Special and watched some clips of the new season. I'm not a fan of RTD, and not a DW fan anymore (not for a long time), but it was an interesting study in how studios try to attract old and new fans.

I read a lot of books, and that lie people tell you about all books being good for you is a lie, because a cyberpunk anthology of short stories made me so angry I got heartburn. I think people who say that are saying so because they wish that they could read a lot, in which case I say, yes I think reading is a gift and we should engage with it, however, sometimes I get so physically angry from something stupid/bad I've read because bad writers exist that it gives me actual pain. I am reading Howl's Moving Castle right now and it's very joyful; I am very surprised by the liberties the animated film took! However so far I do think both experiences are worthwhile, and if you enjoyed the Ghibli film, I very much recommend checking out the original book if you want to revisit that world again. The prose is straightforward but a little whimsical, and Howl is very, very funny. I have laughed aloud a few times.

Well, you know I rewatched Dark, and it's funny that during my exile I said 'this is like if RWBY got the ending it deserves' and then, er, I found out it's not renewed yet, and that's still up in the air, which for the entirety of RWBY I have only had one true moment of doubt of such a thing, and that was a while ago.

On that topic, yes, I still ship Jaune/Cinder, believe Cinder's redemption is likely, etc., although there are some more external concerns I would wager now than before. Before I thought it very possible to do without any commercial influence, and it depends what compromises they do or don't end up making or having already made. My analysis of Jaune's arc in V9 may not hold water as much (e.g. if you lean towards the view there were rewrites to cater to growing the audience, or perhaps it's two ideas married? I'm not sure) so I'm going to think about it more, and there always has been a tension in RWBY between what is being expected/baited and what is foreshadowed/said/actually happens.

I figured out how to write again and what was blocking me, so there's that. To talk about it a bit more, since my break I have worked every single day on writing. My key takeaways are that you need a delicate balance of delusion and self-doubt to get anything done - you don't know you can do something until you actually do it - and every excuse I invented for not writing was not the reason I was not writing. I can write with a migraine beginning to set in on an uncomfortable desk where I can't even rest my elbows properly on the end of a bed with no back support without aircon in the middle of summer before I've even taken my hair out from bedtime plaits in my pyjamas. I didn't even expect to get my fic done right before midnight, actually I was like 'well lol that's not going to happen, I'll write anyway though, fuck New Year's' because I wasn't doing anything, and then I finished and looked at the time and was like ooooh. I actually completed my goal! So I'm very proud of that. Anyway writing is breathing, to me, I go crazy if I don't do it, no matter what it is, and every single piece of nonsense advice of productivity was not helpful, ever, but I did figure it out. Also admittedly I got a fire burning under me again because I found out I was actually right about Raven, in which case I took that as a sign from heaven I was on the right track. One should hope.

I am excited about Dune Part Two, yes, although I am trying to avoid Villeneuve talking about the film because I know all the marketing is basically directed at people who aren't Dune fans, and I have to see it for myself to see what it's worth. I enjoyed the first film, and Villeneuve seems excited to direct Dune Messiah, in which case I am willing to do whatever possible to make that happen. Because that's about as complete a story you're going to get in a major motion picture adaptation and it would be So Fucking Good.