#Lucifer is a dramatic little bitch

[ghostboneswrites2]

Crush

This one is for the sensitive girlies with emotional regulation issues that find themselves hopelessly attracted to emotionally unavailable men. (Aka me) Idk how I feel about it tbh. We’ll see.

Summary: While on a Rick-ordered fishing trip with Daryl, things are tense and uncomfortable. Emotions run high, things are said. (Prison Era)

Warnings: fem!reader / age gap (reader is in her early-mid 20s) / swearing / dramatic and angsty / mean!Daryl

Masterlist // Taglist

Seductive Summer - D.D. Fic Challenge

Dividers by sister-lucifer

A bead of sweat trickled down your temple as you licked your lips, mouth dry from the hot sun. You blinked, eyes fixated on rough hands and bulging muscles as the thin fabric of a black button-up struggled to contain their mass. He moved with precision, callouses delicately threading the line through the pretentiously small hole of the fishing hook.

“Ya gonna help or sit there lickin’ your lips like a bitch in heat?” Daryl finally snapped, growing tired of the sensation of lustful eyes boring into him. In a feeble attempt to mask your shame, you rolled your eyes and huffed, annoyedly picking up a hook to thread your own line through.

This wasn’t a rare occurrence. If anything, it was the norm. Daryl, the handsome but brooding archer, simply trying to complete whatever tasks had been delegated to him on any given day, while the young twenty-something years old Y/N gawks at his physique. It got under his skin, to say the least. He was a man of responsibility, and he found his inner workings far too complex for some little girl with a childish crush to ever understand.

He’d allow it for some time — the stares, the gnawing of your lips, the way you tended to linger around wherever he went — and then the flattery would wear off quickly, and he’d be sure to make it known. It wasn’t like it was a secret that you adored him. He knew it, you knew it, everyone did. You could barely keep your eyes off him from the moment you met him.

Still, despite the judgmental onlookers and his not-so-subtle lack of fondness for you, you just couldn’t help your thirst. To put it simply, you were down bad.

When Daryl had finished his half of the lines he moved on to fashioning small fish traps to place in the stream. He noticed you seemed lost in thought, attention set on the task at hand for once, instead of his big arms and broad chest, or the way his sweat always perfectly follows the framework of his—

“Ya draggin’ your ass on purpose?” He asked, breaking you free from your thoughts.

“I’ll finish when I finish.” You fired back.

That was another thing that irked him to his core. You were so childish. Any hint of criticism or expression of his discomfort always resulted in you sulking or catching an attitude. He didn’t have time to coddle your feelings.

He shrugged you off and focused on nestling the first trap strategically between some stones. As he worked his way down to the last trap, he wondered to himself why Rick always sent you out to fish with him. As previously mentioned, everyone knew how you felt about Daryl, including Rick. Most people also knew that the feeling was not mutual, and in fact, there might have even been some resentment on Daryl’s end.

Truth be told, Daryl didn’t exactly know why it was such an issue. Aside from your youth, which he felt he did not share, you were fairly pleasant in the beginning. Your sweet grin and generous nature weren’t exactly unwelcome at first. It wasn’t until your efforts became too blatant that he felt himself physically recoil at the sound of your voice. As soon as he noticed that people were catching on, watching in awe every time you’d approach him with some fresh water or a snack, a flip switched in his mind. You were no longer a lovely addition to his daily proceedings, but a nuisance to his inner peace.

That was when you changed, too. You noticed the contrast in behavior immediately. It was a talent of yours — or maybe a curse — to be so perceptive. You’d been that way your whole life. Always walking on eggshells, analyzing every word spoken or facial expression made.

When Daryl’s friendliness transformed into indifference, you found yourself trying harder and harder, only to feel more and more disappointment with each failed attempt at gaining his affections. You frequently scolded yourself for the pathetic behavior, which was what you were doing while you slowly threaded fishing lines through the hooks. Any woman with respect for herself would have abandoned ship at the first signs of angry seas, but you were the kind of captain that preferred to drown with her vessel.

Soon enough you’d finished with your hooks and Daryl had placed the last trap. With haste, you both worked to tie worms to the hooks and cast the lines, hoping by this time tomorrow to be returning to camp with a fish dinner. The stream was half a days hike east of the prison, so usually teams of two would take a two or three day ‘vacation’, as Glenn and Maggie would call it, and bring back as much fish as they could.

Once all eight lines were cast, you planted your makeshift rods in the dirt and got to work building a campfire while Daryl hurried to try and get a few squirrels to eat. At least, that was his excuse. In reality, Carol had packed enough food for the both of you. He just wanted to get away.

By nightfall, he was back, cleaning a raccoon and preparing it for the fire. You already had the tent pitched and water boiling to drink, so you were just relaxing with you feet in the cold creek.

Daryl was nice enough to let you know when the raccoon was ready, so you ate at the fire with him in silence.

“I’ll take watch tonight.” Daryl announced as he shoveled the last piece of meat into his mouth.

“You take watch every time.” You pointed out. It was true, he always kept watch on fishing trips.

“What, ya wanna stay up all night? Be my guest.” He retorted.

“I’m not saying that, I’m just saying you don’t have to stay up every time.” You droned.

“Well it ain’t like ya ever volunteer.” He scoffed.

“Because you always do it first.”

“Yeah, ‘cause ya never speak up the whole day we’re workin’.” He argued.

“Okay well I’m volunteering now.”

“Well, forget it, ‘cause I already said I’d do it.”

“Fine.” You shrugged.

With a huff, you pushed yourself off the ground, swiping dry leaves from your jeans as you marched over to the tent to retrieve a sleeping bag for Daryl. You dropped it on the ground beside him. It landed with a soft thud.

“The hell’s that for?” He asked.

“Use it or don’t. I don’t care. Carol packed it for you.” You said bitterly.

You retired to the tent after that, working on taking your gun apart and putting it back together for practice. When you grew tired of that, you dug in your bag for a cigarette and stealthily unzipped your tent, scanning the coast for any signs of Daryl and his deep scowl that he seemingly reserved for you only. The fire had died down to smoky ember, but you could just barely make out the stillness in the dark. Nothing was moving, which meant Daryl had probably stalked off somewhere, and you could be alone.

You never really liked being alone, but at least you were free to be yourself, unperceived by others.

You found yourself a nice stump to sit on before you lit the cigarette, savoring the first drag before slowly exhaling.

“That best not be one of mine.” A husky voice startled you from the dark. Your attention snapped toward the trees as his looming figure emerged from the shadows. You rolled your eyes and turned away again.

“You mean the stale ones you lifted off a rotting body? No thanks.” You snarked.

“Whatever.” He tutted, twitching his neck to flip some hair out of his eyes. You could hear his footsteps fading away behind you as you tried to enjoy your smoke without his miserable aura around to cloud up the fresh air. To your surprise, he returned moments later with a cigarette of his own. He leaned back against a tree across from you, sliding down until his ass hit the ground. His face illuminated behind the flame as he flicked his zippo open. Subtly, you watched while the shadows danced across his chiseled features as he guided the tip of his cigarette into the flame with his lips.

With a metallic click, the lighter flipped shut and he was shrouded in darkness once more. Your eyes thoughtlessly followed the small red orb of his cherry as he pulled on his cigarette and dropped his hands back into his lap. He didn’t say anything, and it was a tad too dark to really be able to tell, but you knew he was watching you, just as you were watching him. The minutes ticked by as your cigarette faded to ash. Just as you leaned down to snuff the butt in the dirt, he cleared his throat.

“‘M gon’ tell Rick not to send ya out here with me no more.” He informed you.

“Why?” You asked defensively.

“‘Cause you’re too slow. I’ll get more done with someone else.” He explained.

“Like who?” You insisted.

“Like someone who ain’t so distracted.” He sighed with exasperation. He didn’t really even know why he told you that. He was considering telling Rick not to send you with him anymore, but he hadn’t really decided one way or another yet. He guessed he just had to cause tension to keep himself from staring at you too long.

“Yeah.” You scoffed. “That’s why.”

“Well, why the hell else would it be?” He snapped.

“You just don’t wanna be around me.” You mumbled.

“Maybe I wouldn’t mind it if you’d act like a fuckin’ adult!” He raised his voice now, and you regretted saying anything. He could sense you shrinking back from his harsh tone, which only angered him more. “All ya do is stare at me all fuckin’ day and pout like a schoolgirl when ya don’t get your way!”

Tears welled at the rim of your eyes, sniffling as you swallowed a lump in your throat. You hated being yelled at, being cornered, being made to feel like a vulnerable child. You hated that he could affect you that way.

Quickly, the pain and anxiety melted away. You began to feel angry. Enraged, even, at the fact that he could treat you so harshly. What had you done to deserve that? Why did he think it was okay to be so cruel?

A rush of adrenaline washed over you as you abruptly stood to your feet, trembling as your emotions overcame you.

“Excuse me for trying! For being kind! For putting up with your piss-poor attitude and still thinking the fucking world of you! All I do is try to treat you the way I wish someone would treat me! No matter how fucking awful you are to me!” You shouted, bitter and full of resentment.

“So why the hell do ya still try?!” He shouted back, pushing himself off the ground and towering over you. In the dark, your most visible feature was your big wet eyes glistening in the natural light of the moon. His eyes flickered between them, somewhat intimidating by how expressive they were. A man like him spent his whole life perfecting his mask, hiding his true feelings from the world, protecting them beneath the surface of his hardened shell.

“Because I love, Daryl!” You shrieked, voice coarse from strain. “I love. I have so much love to give and nowhere to fucking put it! And — and I see you and I see a man who’s never felt love and I—“ You paused to let out a sob and catch your breath. “Because for whatever reason, I saw you and decided you were the one that I needed to love and that doing so would make everything else make sense.”

Daryl seemed taken aback by your confession. He didn’t know how to process any of it, so he instead decided to push you away even more.

“I don’t need your fuckin’ love, alright?” He spat, emphasizing the word love as if the word disgusted him. “I don’t need it, and I don’t want it.”

His words stung as they approached you from gritted teeth. The blow was harsh enough o knock you down from your rage-high.

“Well…” You croaked, sniffling as you wiped remnants of fresh tears from your cheeks. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, you found yourself at a loss of words. Maybe there was nothing else to say. “Glad we cleared things up, then.”

You spent the night silent in the tent, tears spinning down your flushed cheeks as you stared blankly at the worn fabric above you. Eventually you fell asleep, but you got little rest. Daryl gathered all the fish the next morning while you tore down the campsite. The hike back home was spent feet apart, both of you ensuring to keep your distance. Your stoic expressions didn’t go unnoticed upon returning to the prison, but luckily nobody pried. Carol, Maggie, and Beth cooked up the fish and some fresh garden veggies while you snuck off to shower and Daryl disappeared to wherever.

You skipped dinner, hiding away in your cell with a sheet hung up for privacy. You actually fell asleep fairly quick, exhausted from the vast range of emotions you experienced in such a short amount of time the night before.

Daryl, on the other hand, laid awake on his cot for a majority of the night. His mind’s eye repeated the events of the night prior, peppered with correlated instances from times passed. Carol had told him once that he was too hard on you, that you were just searching for anything that would make you feel good in such a rotten world. She was right, he knew that, and yet he could not bring himself to allow it.

He didn’t see how nobody else saw it the way he did. Would it not have been easier keep things simple? It made more sense to him for things to remain above the surface level, where emotions and deep connections could not harm either of you. To grow attached in this world was surely a fools game. So why did everyone seem so hell-bent on making friends and falling in love? Why were they willing to take the risk?

He was exhausted the next morning. By the time he fell asleep the sun was creeping over the horizon. You were a bit better off after a full night of sleep. Your eyes were less puffy than the day before, and your stomach was aching for a bite to eat. Daryl had no appetite or energy. He stayed in bed well past noon.

You didn’t see him until dinner that night, not that you were looking. For the first time in a while, you decided to allow yourself some peace.

Since you’d slept so well the night before, you offered to take over watch for Carol, which she accepted gratefully. You brought yourself a cigarette and one of the books from the library to entertain yourself. Just as you settled in and got comfortable in the tower, the hatch opened and Daryl emerged with his own items for amusement.

You didn’t say anything as he lifted himself up. You just watched him quizzically. He paused when he noticed you sitting there.

“I got watch tonight. Told Rick.” He informed you.

“I took over for Carol.” You countered blandly.

“Well you’re relived.” He pushed.

“No thanks.” You brushed him off.

“Ain’t askin’.” He said.

“I was here first.” You shrugged, lighting your cigarette and flipping to the first chapter of your book.

“I ain’t goin’ nowhere so ya might as well get on.” He urged.

“I’m sure the fence could use some relief from the walkers.” You suggested.

“So why don’t ya go and take care of ‘em?” He retorted.

“Because I’m on watch.” You countered.

Daryl sighed in defeat.

“Got an extra one o’ those?” He asked, gesturing toward the cigarette.

“Only brought the one.” You replied.

“Look,” he began, shifting uncomfortably on his feet. “‘M sorry I was an asshole, but it can’t be the way ya want it to be.”

“And what way did I want it?” You quirked a brow.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Make shit hard. Ya always do that.”

“So then the simple solution would be to leave me alone. I get it. You don’t want me.”

“It ain’t about wantin’ you, girl!” He groaned in exasperation. “It’s about protectin’ you! Protectin’ me! Protectin’ everyone!”

His chest rose and fell as his fists clenched at his sides. You stared up at him and fawned under his blazing eyes.

“We can’t… I can’t.” He insisted.

Silence consumed you both in the night. The tension was so palpable that it drowned out the nightly buzz of crickets and frogs in the trees. Daryl felt he had said too much already. He should have just let you hate him and left it be. He couldn’t, though. As much as he wanted to be cold, hard, and arrogant, he was very much a soft soul with a longing for genuine connection.

With a deep sigh and an expression of defeat, he retreated back to his cell without another word to you.

To be continued… Maybe??

tags: @kissmeunicornbaobei @thesadcatt0 @clairealeehelsing @duckybird101 @tmntfixationxreader @ryoujoking @blackvelveteen1339 @yondus-girl @ladylincoln @sunshinebug9 @saylum559 @yoowhatthefuck @duffmckagansbandana @celtic-crossbow @virginsexgod69 @dazzling-roaring-20s @l0kilaufeys0n7 @uhnanix @superbowlisgay @liizzygrant @eddiemunsonsupremecy

[libraryraccoon]

A Penguin And The Angel Of Death

Gift for : @deadghosy

Gender : Penguin

Pronouns : They/Them

Message of Raccoon : I just really wanted to write Azrael with Penguin!Reader, so I try.

TW : bad english, english isn't my first language.

How you met Azrael is a mystery for everyone.

Azrael had heard about Heaven and Hell fighting over a penguin, and he decided to go check it out.

"So you're the famous Penguin." -Azrael, seeing you for the first time.

Friendship. Instantly.

He was your platonic soulmate.

I can see Azrael taking you flying with him. Imagine being a normal angel or demon, looking up and seeing the angel of death flying, holding a penguin in his arms.

The day of the trial, you and Azrael were watching everything from the sidelines, eating popcorn.

“Do you think they know you’re going to stay with me ?” -Azrael, watching the scene while eating popcorn, amused.

You made a penguin noise that can be translates as "Sshh, this is starting to get interesting." -Penguin!Reader, watching the scene like a TV novela.

Azrael speaks penguin. Don't ask how, he just do it.

"Guardship returns to.." Sera paused, either in disbelief or to be dramatic. “Azrael ?!” Certainly the first.

“Yo bitch.”

They looked at him as if they were seeing him for the first time- they hadn't even noticed him.

"WHAT ?! BUT HE DON'T EVEN KNOW THEM !" -Lute.

You worried for a second for Azrael's safety before remembering that he was the Angel of Death and that he was in no danger.

Lucifer looks at his brother, feeling betrayed that he is taking one of his children away from him.

Azrael walked out of the room with you in his arms, happy of the trial he saw today.

Azrael is like your cool dad who takes you everywhere with him and takes you wherever you want.

Azrael can go to Heaven, Hell or even Earth just with a snap of his fingers, say your destination and he'll take you there with no problem.

You often go to Hell and Heaven because you are attached to the people that are there.

Azrael only leaves you alone with Lucifer or Emily.

Lucifer is basically your uncle who babysits you all the time.

You have met Big G and the other archangels. I don't make the rules, as soon as Azrael won your guardship, he introduced you to the rest of the family.

You are the archangels' favorite nephew and Big G's favorite grandchild.

I just know that you and Big G spent hours on grandpa-grandchild outings. You go to the beach, get ice cream, play jokes on others... until Azrael comes to pick you up.

I headcanon that you help Gabriel in his work as a messenger.

It was you who passed the message of Sir Pentious being in Heaven to Charlie, telling her that redemption was possible.

It was your first message, Gabriel and Azrael were very proud of you after you managed to successfully transmit it.

They had a party to celebrate it.

No one can fuck with you.

Literally, you have Azrael, Big G and all the archangels on your side. Upsetting you/being on your bad side is a death sentence.

Lute and Adam are so disgusted that Azrael stole you - like you can feel their jealousy at 3000km/h.

Azrael just smiled at them before calling you “his son/daughter/child” in front of them just to piss them off.

And it works.

I can see Alastor trying to make a deal with Azrael for you to stay at the Hotel, Azrael just looks at him like "Really now ?"

Needless to say, it never worked and if it wasn't for you, he would have already killed the deer demon.

The angels find it adorable that the fearsome angel of death is walking around with a little Penguin, it's just too cute for them.

Family dinners are ✨️beautiful✨️

Beautiful in the sense that it's chaotic and it's never bored.

Usually family dinners are you, Big G, Azrael, Lucifer, Charlie, and the other archangels.

But one day you invited Emily, Sera, Adam and Lute to join you..

Let's say you weren't bored during all the dinner.

The best moments are those of hugs.

Hugs with Azrael are the best because he wraps his wings around you while carrying you. It's so quiet and peaceful that it puts you to sleep, which is very useful especially when you can't fall asleep.

Hugs with the whole family are... interesting ?

I mean, from the outside it looked like a mess of nameless feathers-

You are always in the middle of family hugs.

Azrael almost executed all the exterminators after learning about the extermination that was directed against the hotel when you were in it..

LET ME CANONIZE PROTECTIVE!DAD!AZRAEL.

[demonicchicken1121]

Alastor, Rosie, and Cannibal Town: an Analysis (I’m fucking at it (Alastor Posting) again)

Ok I know that a lot of people have already been talking about this, but I really want to analyze Alastors behavior in cannibal town and how it’s so much different than how he behaves literally anywhere else.

Alastors true motives, personality, opinions, etc are widely debated in the fandom. Does he actually care about Charlie or the hotel? What’s his beef with Lucifer? Why did he make a deal and who was it with? Al is such a mysterious and closed off character, and his demeanor changes so frequently that no one in or out of universe really knows much about him. I personally think that the closest we get to seeing Alastor in his truest and most authentic self is when he’s in cannibal town.

From the moment they arrive, Alastors demeanor changes dramatically, even from a few moments before, when Charlie was venting about her relationship issues. He seems genuinely excited to be there and see Rosie, to the point where he seems to forget he brought Charlie here for a reason (hell I think he forgets Charlie is even there at a few points.)

Al and Rosie HAVE seen each other since he returned to hell, at the overlord meeting, but they didn’t really have the time to interact. Even so, they are so in tune with each other. This man was gone for seven years and here they are gaslight gatekeep girlbossing like nothing happened.

But once they actually have the opportunity to interact outside of the overlord meeting they’re super excited to catch up. The only other time he shows this much enthusiasm to see someone is with Mimzy, but things quickly goes south when she puts the hotel is danger. Alastors friendship with mimzy feels very onesided, and it seems that she only shows up when she needs something. While Alastor and Rosie clearly ask each other for favors, it feels a lot more equal in a way where they each get an equal amount of benefit.

And while we haven’t seen much of them yet, I get the vibe that they hang out in their free time and respect each others boundaries and schedules. I think Al went through cannibal town hoping to see her in the prequel comic, but figured she was busy after the extermination and instead asked some of the residents to say hello on his behalf. But that’s just a theory, a gam-

Also just a little thing I noticed, when rosie is joking about Charlie being too young for Alastor, Charlie looks visibly annoyed, but Alastors body language and expression don’t change. He tends to react relatively strongly when anyone (Angel) makes a move on him or assumes he’s dating anyone, but I think he knows Rosie well enough to know she’s joking.

Alastor lets his guard down so much in this part of the episode. He’s really in his element and his behavior seems so natural and genuine.

I love how he’s so willing to just roast Susan. Every iconic duo has that one person they fucking hate and will not be subtle about how much they fucking hate them. It’s especially funny with alastor, who’s usually really pretentious and passive aggressive when he insults someone, but with Susan it’s just

“✨Ornery old bitch?✨” also this is the only time in the entire series that alastor swears in a genuinely humorous way. In almost every other example, he is trying to intimidate someone or piss them off, and also when his staff was broken.

And speaking of his staff, I think it was actually a big deal that Alastor let Charlie use it, even tho it was for a very short time. This does show that whether or not he actually cares about her, Alastor does have a certain amount of trust and respect for Charlie. Despite that, I don’t think he would have done this if he wasn’t in cannibal town and with Rosie. The staff is clearly very important to him and likely holds some amount of his power, given how he reacted when it was broken.

As weird as this sentence is out of context, I think Alastor feels very safe in cannibal down. Rosie and probably the other cannibals genuinely like and respect him. it speaks volumes that not only he let Charlie use his staff, but he put himself in the position that would leave him vulnerable to Rosie if Charlie were to turn on him. While he knows it’s highly unlikely that would happen, I think it’s still worth noting that he intentionally left himself in such a vulnerable position in cannibal town and nowhere else.

Something else interesting I noticed, is that “ready for this” is one of the only songs that Alastor is interacting with another character, and isn’t competing for the spotlight. He is walking all over Vox in “stayed gone”, and getting walked all over by Lucifer in “Hells greatest dad”, but here, he’s very in tune with everyone else. He and Rosie are on equal footing and he feels secure enough to fade into the background a bit, harmonizing with the cannibals and letting Charlie take the lead.

So yeah, I feel like Cannibal town is alastors home in hell. His relationship with Rosie is probably the most positive relationship he has in the whole show. I think viv has mentioned that Alastor wasn’t a cannibal before he died, and I’m not sure if that’s still canon, but if it is, I can definitely see him becoming a cannibal when he became friends with Rosie. I can also see Rosie being one of his first friends in hell, maybe they even rose to power together. I’m clearly getting into some more speculative headcanons because I do what I want, but I’m putting them in their own section.

Now for headcanons with little to no substantial evidence ✨✨✨

I do actually really like the idea that they became friends very quickly and rose to power together. I like the idea that they were friends before Alastor became this super powerful force in hell. It also makes sense that he would trust someone who wanted to be his friend back when people weren’t constantly asking for favors or testing his power. Bc I do think that there was a short period of time between him arriving in hell and rising to power. (I have a lot of ideas about how he got his powers which probably will get its own post, but to brief, he wasn’t super powerful when he arrived in hell.) it makes sense that him and Rosie would have become friends in that period.

When he did start rising to power, I think Rosie would have guided him, given that he was a relatively new sinner. She would help him find overlords to target, possibly even letting him recruit cannibals to help him take them down. After he was finished broadcasting their screams, he would return their bodies to Rosie for her to sell. Maybe any cannibals who helped him would get discounts or first pickings.

This makes sense to me bc not only would it help explain why Alastor has never seen Rosie as a rival or a target, but also it would help explain why they’re so close. Nothing builds a friendship better than overthrowing incredible forces of power. Also they totally square dance on the weekends.

Viv please I need an episode that’s nothing but these two dicking around in cannibal town for twenty minutes.

[storydays]

Radio Killed the Video Star P2

(3rd Pov)

*In the Vs' Tower*

"We have a problem." Vox grumbled as Valentino's assistant passed out their drinks. "Alastor is getting close to the royal Morningstars. So our main concern now is ensuring that no deal is ever struck between Lucifer's brats and that smiling freak." He rolled his eyes at the thought of the red demon.

"Well, how exactly are we supposed to stop it?" Velvette replied, looking up from her phone. "Put something inside them. That's how I get the bitches to behave." grinned Valentino from where he was decorating his gun.

"Well, maybe someone on the inside isn't such a bad idea." hummed Vox before he pointed at the moth. "Do you think Angel would?"

"That lanky prick won't even return my calls." scoffed Val.

Sighing, Vox stood up and walked around to the window. "We need someone who little Miss Bleeding Heart would take in."

"Someone pathetic, desperate, with no direct ties to us." Velvette listed. "I employ every down on their luck loser this side of hell. Who the fuck is left?" Valentino wondered. Vox chuckled before turning to his partners with his hypnosis eye glowing. "I think I have just the one." he grinned.

*Back at the hotel*

Alastor's shadow demon minons lounged around the bar, Tommy stretching his arm, having pulled a muscle, when Charlie and Vaggie came back from their search, defeat written on their faces. Charlie groaned dramatically as she flopped onto the couch, face first.

Angel perked up hearing the princess; "Sooo, how'd it go?" he asked, smiling and turning his attention to his phone. "Not a single new recruit," Vaggie sighed.

"Yeah, well, who would want to use their last days not fucking and fighting?" shrugged Angel. "More than you'd think, Angel." (Y/N) yawned as he walked down the stairs, Rocco trailing behind him.

After his mope feast in his room, the blond demon fell asleep reading one of his romance novels, and had slept for a good 6 hours. 'Great, now I'll be up all night.' (Y/N) thought to himself as he sat on the far end of the couch, running a hand through Charlie's braid in a comforting manner.

"Well, look who's finally awake. I missed you, baby. Did you dream of me, sweets?" Angel purred, leaning over to run a hand over (Y/N)'s wings, grunting when (Y/N) playfully fluffed his wings in Angel's face.

(Y/N) chuckled, feeling smug at finally getting the spider back. Angel wasn't one to be outdone, so he teasingly ran a finger between the prince's shoulder blades in the middle of his back, giggling at the involuntary shivers that ran through his body.

A sudden knock on the door turned Vaggie's attention from the men flirting, and approached the door, to reveal Sir Pentious, who smiled brightly. "Why, hello, my dear--" he yelped as Vaggie punched him in his face before pulling her angelic spear out and pointing it at him.

"Wait, wait, wait! I come in peasssse (peace)." The snake demon made peace signs with his hands with a wobbly smile.

"What are you doing here?" hissed Vaggie. "Vaggie, what's the problem?" asked Charlie, still feeling sour from her failed search.

She gasped seeing the snake. "Oh, hello again." Vaggie let him up as she watched him suspiciously. "I didn't come looking for a fight. I uhh..I heard that you're helping people. People who want to be better?" The snake asked more than stated.

Charlie gasped excitedly, before dragging the snake behind her, chattering happily, leaving Vaggie to scowl at the snake. "You heard right. Welcome to our home of healing. Our resort of restoration. Our--" The princess was cut off by Angel Dust stopping her in the door way.

"Are you fucking nuts? This chump was tryin' to kill us, like, literally 6 hours ago. And now you wanna bring him in her to live with us?" Angel asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Absolutely!" Charlie grinned, "This place is about second chances, and who deserves one more than this...slithery...slippery...special little man?"

Looking at Vaggie, Angel asked, "Aren't you supposed to protect this place?"

Vaggie made the mistake of looking at Charlie's (well timed and manipulative) puppy dog eyes. She sighed heavily before shrugging, "I...guess he's not much of a threat without the war machine.." Sir Pentious' hood lifted as he grinned brightly, "Or even with the war machine." Vaggie thought, making the snake visibly deflate.

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Charlie squealed before running over to the demon. "Sir Pentious! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!"

"Oh no, darling, thank you. You won't regret thissss." He chirped happily, slitheirng in after the princess.

"Eh, I give you a week...tops." Angel shrugged, following them inside.

"So..this is the bar and the bartender." Charlie grinned at a drinking, scowling Husk. "And this is the curtain, and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh and, oh, this, this is-" Charlie was cut from her excited rambling by Vaggie pulling her arm.

"Babe, you don't have to show him every detail." she placed her hand on her hip, watching the demoness.

"Sorry, I'm just excited to have our first real guest!" Charlie grinned.

"Uh, what the hell am I, then?" demanded Angel Dust, as he narrowed his eyes at Charlie.

"Well, you're an important part of our family here, Angel. But you um, uh..." "Constantly make us look bad, sexually harass (Y/N) and Husk, and have literally never once tried to improve?" Vaggie listed.

"What she means is, it's just nice to have someone be interested for a change." Charlie sugar coated, gesturing at the snake who eyed everything suspiciously.

She walked over to the red eyed demon, introducing Niffty, not noticing Angel's frown on his face. As Charlie continued to introduce Niffty, saying that they were 80% sure she was harmless, she bumped into the Radio Demon, she grinned nervously.

"Oh, uh, Alastor, our gracious Facility Manager." Turning to Alastor, she continued, "You've met our newest guest, Sir Pentious...heh heh."

"Ah yes. You're the one who ruined my coat. I definitely remember you now." He grinned sinisterly, eyes glowing an eerie red.

"Well...I guess this is a great time for your first lesson. Ahem, 'How to apologize.' The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you're wrong. Why don't you give it a try?" Charlie pushed Sir Pentious towards Alastor who grinned lazily.

"Yes, um...Mr um..Radio Demon, sir, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat...Um, here." He nervously gave back the piece he'd ripped off of Alastor earlier in the day.

"Oh-ho! Not many people have been able to take even this much off me." He looked at Sir Pentious with a condescending smile, "It must've meant quite a lot to you."

Sir Pentious and Charlie watched with wide eyed looks as Alastor burned up the piece of coat with a wicked grin.

(Y/N) laughed loudly from where he was observing at the top of the stairs. "Pfft, hahaha! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but you're faces were too much for me." He snickered, wiping a tear away from his eye, making his way down towards the group.

"Oh! And Prince (Y/N) he's also my big brother! He's also my advisor when it comes to business administration. And he's my bestest friend." The siblings shared a fist bump, sharing matching grins.

"Welcome to the Hazbin hotel, Sir Pentious. I've got to say, your machines are something to wonder at. I'd love to go over the mechanics sometime." (Y/N) held his hand out for a handshake, yelping when the snake hugged him, "Nobody's ever admired my skillssssss.! We are going to be great friendssss." sobbed Pentious.

Angel was now full on glaring at the snake...how dare he touch (Y/N) like that?! It took a while before (Y/N) allowed anyone new to touch him.

"Um..Charlie? Isn't it time for our daily activity?" squeaked (Y/N), clearly uncomfortable in the snake's grip.

*Time skip*

(Y/N) was sitting in his favorite arm chair, Angel Dust leaning protectively on his legs, letting the blond run his fingers through Angel's head fluff. It was so soft, he couldn't resist and Angel certainly didn't mind, if the slight purring the spider was doing was an indication.

Angel scrolled lazily through his phone, Vaggie and Pentious sitting on the floor listening as Charlie spoke.

"Now! With a new resident, I think it's important we all get to know each other, so we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me.

"🎵My name is Charlie," she claps twice and kneels down to smile at Vaggie's love struck look, "I like to sing," She stood up gesturing to everyone, clapping again. "And when we get to know each other, it's the greatest thing!🎵" Charlie clapped once more and gestured to Sir Pentious.

(Y/N) smiled; that was a game he taught her when she was a kid.

"🎵My name's Sir Pentious," claps twice, "I like to build," claps twice again, "And despite my stupid Egg Bois, I think I'm very skilled🎵." He clapped twice for the last time before he and Charlie both gestured to the white furred spider.

He stopped the quite purring, and looked up from his phone with a look of irritation. "This is stupid." Angel deadpanned. (Y/N) snorted softly as he brushed the white fur back.

"🎵This is not stupid!" Charlie claps twice with a forced smile, "It's just the game. Sir Pentious did it well, so now please try to do the same.🎵'" She twirled in front of Angel who sighed, pinching the bridge of his beak(nose).

"I am too sober for this." (Y/N) tugged his hair slightly in a playful warning.

"Ooh, harder, Daddy~" fake moaned Angel, yelping in surprise when the blushing prince actually tugged harder in retaliation.

"Well, get used to it and learn how to play. 🎵This is gonna be your whole day 🎵 ." Vaggie clapped twice with a smirk at the glare Angel sent her.

*Timeskip*

"Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs. Now, where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to?" Angel read from the script, feeling like an idiot. He glared slightly as (Y/N) wore the biggest shit eating grin from where he was standing behind the others who sat on the couch.

Breaking character, he hissed at the prince, "Don't you say a word."

He was dressed like a homeless man, and Sir Pentious was licking a lollipop wearing a uniform. "Wow, who wrote this?" Angel asked aloud, smacking the script. "It's great, right. Keep going." Charlie grinned like a school girl.

The Italian sighed heavily before continuing, "Hey you." He faked called Pentious. "Who me?" asked the snake in a child like tone.

"Yeah, you look like a kid who could use some devil's dandruff?" Angel squinted his eyes, sliding a hand down his face in disbelief. "Oh, for fucks' sake."

"Not me. I have to go home and sssstudy."

"C'mon, kid, it'll make you cool like me...." Angel paused, hearing (Y/N)'s snickering, and felt his body drop at the dumbass script in his hand, "The crackhead."

(Y/N) couldn't hold it back anymore before he laughed loudly. He was laughing so hard, he fell on the floor behind the couch,tears pooling in his eyes from laughing.

The others' waited for him to finish, so they could hear the play. Charlie rolled her eyes at her brother with a fond smile. It'd been a while since he'd laugh like that. Angel smiled, hearing (Y/N) belly laugh. 'No, I'm supposed to be mad at him, right now.' He thought stubbornly, cheeks flushed.

"The only cool thing here is to sssay no to drugsss. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!" declared the snake proudly. (Y/N) finally finished his giggles, and was standing back up, watching with weary grin.

"Yes! Oh, bravo, bravo!" cheered Charlie as she clapped excitedly. "Wow, Pentious, at this rate, you'll be redeemed in no time."

"I-I'm going to bed." Angel announced, a funny tone in his voice. He walked away briskly, but not before (Y/N) caught his downcast face. He frowned thoughtfully before teleporting to who knows where.

Angel paused at the steps as he listened to Charlie, "I am so proud of you, Sir Pentious." He turned to watch the interaction. "That was amazing. That was beautiful work today." "Thank you, thank you. You like me, you really like me." preened the snake, bowing slightly.

In his room, Angel shrugged off the costume he was wearing, throwing it on his beloved pet pig, who snorted curiously before laying on his bed and curling on his side.

He pulled his phone out and scrolled through the voicemail he'd received.

Sighing, the spider demon clicked on a random one to listen, "Angel, baby, come home. It's not the same without you here. I miss you, come back." Val's voice cooed before turning angry, "Angel, you bitch, if you don't come home, you will be fucking greasy truck drivers for the next year."

"You fuckin' slut!"

"Hey, Angie, about earlier--"

"Kill your whole fucking fam--"

"Work's really stressful--"

"Little cocksucking piece of shit--"

"You actually think you can change?" The pornstar gasped, sitting up and watching the red smoke curl in his room as he listened to this voicemail. "Addict trash like you doesn't change. I'll see you soon, baby." Angel snapped out of his thoughts as his pig nudged him with his cold snout, looking for attention.

"Sorry, not now, Fat Nuggets." He apologized before heading downstairs.

*Downstairs*

Angel grabbed a bottle of alcohol and started chugging away. "Aah..." He sighed, before seeing a shadow move. "Huh?"

He followed the light to see a door open..and not just any door, the door to (Y/N)'s office was opened. (Y/N) usually was so careful about letting people in there, the prince only Angel himself and Charlie in there. But the blond demon wouldn't leave his office open so carelessly, so someone broke in.

He walked over to the door and peeked an eye in, gasping seeing Sir Pentious placing a camera in (Y/N)'s bookshelf.

"You slippery little shit!"

Sir Pentious yelped at being caught before turning to see the angry spider.

"You're working for the Vees? I fucking knew there was something shitty about you." Angel pointed an accusing finger at the snake who scoffed.

"I don't know what you're talking about, whorebug!" smirked Pentious before Angel growled and tackled him, starting a brawl.

Spoilers: Angel was winning.

"Get your aggressively average body off of me!" screamed Pentious, hypnotizing Angel.

"Fuck!" Angel screamed as he obeyed unwillingly. Sir Pentious hissed as he slithered away to the bookshelf to get some space. Angel narrowed his eyes approaching, just as (Y/N), Charlie and Vaggie appeared, the women who were clearly sleeping, yawned and watched them blearily.

"What's going on?" asked Charlie.

(Y/N) had a box in his hands, and he tilted his head. "Why the hell are you in my office, Pentious?"

"Oh, the door was opened and I was looking for you, Prince (Y/N), when this spider burst in here and attacked me!" "Yes, my door was open, because sometimes Angel keeps me company when insomnia hits us both hard. So I leave it open and we stay up together until we fall asleep." explained (Y/N), missing the knowing looks Vaggie and Charlie shared.

"This little bitch is a traitor!" Angel snapped, holding Pentious arm firmly.

"Preposterous, I would never betray you. You...are my best friends." lied the snake as he pulled Charlie and Vaggie into a group hug. He tried to hug (Y/N) as well, but last time he did, the prince threatened to skin him and let the cannibals from Cannibal Town eat him....alive with his Egg Bois as a side.

Safe to say, everyone was disturbed as (Y/N) made that threat with a smile on his face. Angel found it hot as fuck though...

"Uh-huh. Then explain this." Angel moved one of (Y/N)'s books aside to reveal a video camera, starting to record.

Pentious noticed the shocked looks from Charlie and Vaggie before feeling a dangerous glare at his back.

He shakily turned to look at (Y/N) who was grinning darkly, fangs glinted in the light dangerously; his eyebrow twitching in anger, mixed eyes glowing an deadly red. "Hmm, looks like I'll be following through with that threat after all." He set the box down, and started approaching the Snake.

"Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort! SOS Agent Pentious in need of immediate evacuation!" screamed the snake into a wrist watch as he tried to leave the wrath of the prince.

"Pentious? Wait...you were caught? It hasn't even been a day!" Vox laughed.

Pentious side eyed the hotel members who stood in front of the other exit. Vaggie was now wielding her spear, Charlie holding her hand over her mouth in worry, Angel crossing his arms, while one of his lower arms rested on (Y/N)'s upper back as a way of grounding the pissed off prince.

"Please, you've got to get me out of here!" begged the snake. "I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple. Do us a favor, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself, you miserable failure!" Vox screamed, short circuiting the watch.

(Y/N)'s malicious bloodlust calmed hearing how Vox talked to the snake.

Yes, he was an idiot..but no one deserved to be told to kill themselves. He looked down thinking of...them.

"I--Just make it quick I guess. Not that I deserve it." Pentious laid down sadly, waiting for someone to hurt him. "Gladly." Vaggie growled, before being stopped by (Y/N).

"(Y/N)?" asked Angel, watching the prince as he held a hand out to the snake. "Pentious?"

"Good first day." Charlie sighed happily, reaching a hand out to Vaggie as they walked to bed. "Let's get some rest."

The group walked out of the library, (Y/N) grabbing the camera to dispose of, Angel following behind him.

After a few minutes later, a shadow grinned before Alastor appeared in (Y/N)'s office and picked up the discarded watch, starting it with his powers.

"What?" snapped Vox before he realize who was on the other side. "You'll have to try harder than that next time, ol' pal." Alastor grinned, as Vox screamed on the other side, his laughter echoing in the TV demon's ears.

*With (Y/N)*

He'd pulled Angel out onto the private balcony that came he'd built for his room, the spider lounging on his favorite swing seat that (Y/N) made for him. The two continued to grow closer everyday, and since they hang out so much, the prince wanted the spider to be comfortable. (Y/N) appeared next to Angel, holding out a glass of a red wine with ice on top and an orange slice on the rim.

The Italian mobster raised an eyebrow at the drink. "Relax, it's a Balisteri Cherry Wine. You look like you could use it." (Y/N) showed the other glass in his hand, offering a soft smile when Angel took it. He then sat himself on the railing near Angel, one leg tucked under him, the other hanging over the ledge.

"I'm glad you're here Angel. I'm sorry it took so long for someone to say this but: You're very special, and I know underneath, there's somethin' special just waiting to be unlocked....you just need someone to help you unlock it. I'd like to be that person if you'd let me." (Y/N) blushed slightly before turning to the spider who looked at him with a soft look before replying,

"I'd like that."

*End! For the song, imagine it was a male Charlie singing..I could't find a male version yet.*

See you guys next time!

[viovicugna]

Headcanons about the Obey Me brothers (Mammon, Leviathan, Lucifer, Belphagor and Beelzebub)

Mammon

• Mammon does a little dance when he gets excited, mostly after winning something. He calls it 'the Mammon Groove' everyone else calls it cute stupid.

• He talks very loudly and can't always control it, due to ADHD.

• He heckles like ~ kekekeke ~ when he plans a new get-rich-quick scheme. And lets out a bird like scream when he gets scared. That's why no one enjoys watching horror movies with Mammon. It sounds like they're strangling a turkey.

• He picks on his food. Eats little bites from everything in no order. Lucifer tried making him quit because he's very messy while doing it. But it didn't work, has since given up.

• He's really good at mimicking voices, only Lucifer can tell when it's Mammon.

• Mammon will hoard anything shiny under his bed and forget about it. So there's like forks from the year 1469 that he once stole from the Queen or smt.

Leviathan

• Levi doesn't have to blink in his Demon and True Form. His eyes are covered with thin, see through scales, his eyes have a shiny, iridescent look to them because of it.

• He forgets to blink in his Human Form, so his eyes are often irritated and dry. They're constantly reddened and teary due to it. Asmo hates it and forces him to take eye drops. Like literally forces, he holds him down-

• He picks at his skin a lot. MC freaked out when he pealed off a chunck of his arm skin. But no worries, his skin is thick and he has more layers than humans.

• Has a slight lisp because snake.

• Hisses when he's being dramatic. "Levi get up-" "HIZZZZZZZ NO THE SUN! I'M BURNING-"

• Cuddling with him is like doing yoga. He finds a way that his left leg will end up on your shoulder, his right leg wrapped around your left, his left arm around your waist, his right arm around your neck, and his head under your arm-

• His tongue just bleeps often. It just hangs out his mouth while playing games, or when he's sewing. Anytime he's focused.

• Has a split tongue and can do tricks with it (not like that you pervert-). Thought about getting it pierced, but got stuck on where he could even get it pierced and freaked out at the thought of someone having to look in his mouth. What if his breath smells bad, what if he drools, what if his teeth are-

• His fangs in his Demon Form are venomous, but they only work on Demons. Angels get something like blood poisoning from it. And for Humans it's like taking LSD.

Belphagor

• Everything about Belphie is soft, except his tongue. That bitch feels like sand paper. And he uses that as an advantage when MC messes with him. Sadistic fuck (endearment) only laughs at their misery.

• Has the most beautiful lashes you will ever see. Asmo is shaking in his chanel boots (I wanted to put gucci first but Mammons a gucci guy, Asmo so isn't-). Literally so pretty. Has double lashes (two rows).

• On the theme of eyes, his eyes are gorgeous. Uses that to his advantage also. One pity look and you wanna give him your social security number. They're big and always a little droopy with sleepyness. The only one who can deny him is Beel surprisingly.

• Loves laying on grass. It's the perfect sleeping spot for him.

• Have you seen shampooed cows? His hair is always that fluffy. Once went a month without washing it so it just hung flat, straight down. Then the brothers forced him to take a bath.

• Beel and Belphie, flies and cows ya get it-

• When scared he does that thing that goats do where he runs then falls and acts dead. Just that he's a little gremlin who's waiting for the person to get close enough to attack- It doesn't work on his siblings unfortunately. Be warned, if MC goes anywhere near him then they will be dragged down and cuddled to death. Belphie just lays on them so they can't escape.

• Huffs when frustrated, Beel got that from him.

Lucifer

• Lucifer spends a surprising amount of time grooming himself for how busy he is. Barely anyone notices, but he constantly readjusts his cuffs, gloves, hair, etc. Always takes a quick look in the mirror when there is one. Either smirks, because 'of course, everything is perfect' or furrows his brows and tucks an out of place hair back.

• Walks elegantly with long strides. Never seeming to be in a hurry unless it's an emergency.

• Holds his head high. Very intimidating to lower class Demons.

• Lucifer despises to admit that he also makes sounds close to a Peacocks ~ gobble gobble ~. He only does so when someone scares him, you can guess how many times that happens. Once MC startled him because he forgot they were still in his office. After he made that sound he didn't dare look MC in the eyes for the next week.

• He rattles his feathers to impress or intimidate. When MC is near him whilst he's in his Demon or True form you can observe him constantly flexing his wings and spreading them out to catch their attention.

• Affectionately fixes his brothers and MCs appearances when something's out of place. That's why Satan wears his jacket so fucked. Lucifer helped him put it on once, he took the sleeve off again so they had a fight about his sleeve. Had to stick with it from then on, it's a pride (or wrath ig) thing.

• If someone would pick him up never gonna happen his wings go ~ flop flop ~ because his brain is like 'oh okay, we're flying now'. If your MC is super strong please live mt dream and princess cary Luci around.

• He ties MCs shoes and zips up their jackets for them. He used to do that with the brothers, but they always complain that they're not children anymore. Let the dad be a dad goddamit-

Beelzebub

• Give Beel sugar water. Just water with sugar, he will nip on it for the next hour. It's like a drug, but more weed than cocaine. It calms him down and he just goes blank.

• He rubs his hands together as a habit like flies do.

• His standard position is one hand holding the other. He often rubs his thumb over the back of his other hand to calm down. Tries calming MC if they're worried by grasping their hands in his.

• Beel has trouble registering purely white objects. So when MC held a paper infront of his face he just went 😟

• Sometimes his eyes 'glitch' and he sees double. Has a lazy eye prob.

• In his demon form his wings go ~ buzz buzz ~ randomly.

• Insect phobia triggered

• He huffs when angry, a habit he got from Belphie.

• Beel feels naturally drawn to light, so he subconsciously sits closest to the next light source always. That's why he likes standing so close to MC, cuz to them humans glow (personal hc).

• Similar to Levi Beel sometimes forgets to blink. In his demon and true form he has a very thin, irredecant layer of skin covering his eyes. In his demon and true form it kinda looks like his eyes have multiple sections due to it. Kinda like how a fly's eyes look.

• Beel loves the smell of sweat-

• MC just done running from an angry Lucifer or smt idk, just sweaty and Beel's like "You smell good MC 😊"

• He's like a fly fr. You leave your food out for a second turn around, turn back and he's there on your plate-

[athanasialove]

♥ 𝓜𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓮 𝓝𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 ♥

Paring: None motherfucka Genre: Fluff Summary: Headcannon: Mammon finds this human world movie. Word Count: 540 ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

As you sit in the common room of the House of Lamentation, surrounded by the flickering light of candles and the comforting warmth of your demon brothers. Tonight's entertainment? A human movie that Mammon managed to get his hands on during one of his escapades to the human world. It's called "Candyman," and according to him, it's supposed to be the lamest thing ever.

Leviathan's eyes are focused as he fidgets with the remote control, eager to start the movie. Asmodeus is nestled comfortably on the couch, his nails tapping against the armrest in excitement. Satan sits beside you, looking stoic as ever, but you can sense a hint of curiosity in his eyes.

"Mammon, are you sure this movie won't give us nightmares?" Beelzebub asks, his voice laced with concern as he eats on a cookie.

Mammon waves his hand dismissively. "Nah, it'll be fine! Besides, it's just a human movie. What could possibly scare us demons? Especially the great mammon!"

You chuckle, taking a glance at Lucifer, who is standing by the doorway, observing the scene with amusement. With a sigh, he decides to join you, taking a seat on the other side of the couch.

Leviathan finally presses play, and the screen comes to life with eerie music and dimly lit scenes of a rundown neighborhood. 

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Leviathan's grip on the remote tightens as he leans forward, fully engrossed in the movie. Asmodeus occasionally gasps at the jump scares, but he seems to be enjoying himself nonetheless.

Satan remains composed, his eyes fixed on the screen with a hint of fascination. You can't help but admire his calm demeanor, even in the face of something as seemingly trivial as a human horror movie.

Beel. Well Beel left, he “felt hungry” and left. Occasionally you’ll hear his movement in the kitchen.

When the Candyman finally makes his grand entrance, a high pitched scream comes from Mammon. Mammon, who had been boasting about his fearlessness earlier, is now clutching onto the edge of the couch, his bravado nowhere to be found. "O-Okay, maybe this movie is a little scarier than I thought," he stammers, his eyes glued to the screen.

You hear a slight chuckle come from Lucifer, you steal a glance at Lucifer, expecting to see his usual composed demeanor, but even he seems to be feeling the effects of the movie, a faint furrow forming between his brows.

A loud sound from the screen is heard, Asmo jumps, Levi leans back, a mammon whimpers (like a lil bitch), another jumpscare.

When the credits finally roll, there's a collective sigh of relief mixed with nervous laughter. Asmodeus fans himself dramatically. "Oh, that was positively spine-tingling!"

Leviathan nods in agreement, though you can see lingering fear in his eyes. "Yeah, it was definitely scarier than I expected."

Mammon grumbles under his breath, though you can tell he's relieved that the movie is over.

You steal a glance at Lucifer, who is wearing a faint smirk as he observes the reactions of his brothers. "Well, it seems like Mammon's taste in movies isn't as terrible as we thought."

Satan chuckles softly, a rare smile gracing his lips. "Indeed. It was... an interesting experience."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Meanwhile, the other two be like

♥ 𝓜𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓮 𝓝𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 ♥

[nymphrod]

ALRIGHT BITCHES IM DRUNK ON COLD MEDICINE AND HOPPING ON THE NON EXISTANT BANDWAGON THAT IS APPLEDUST

Being bedridden, Im OBVIOUSLY gonna write a fagfic, so here's the beginning of it because im desperate for approval uwu

[[[“Ha! Good luck with that one.” Husk barked the moment Charlie, Vaggie and Alastor guided Lucifer out of the room to begin the tour of the Hazbin Hotel.

Angel and Sir Pentious looked at Husk quizzically as he made Mimzy’s drink.

“You heard him, he said he likes women.”

“Oh baby, I’ve made straight men quiva’,” Angel starts, using his pointer and middle finger, to walk up Husk’s arm, “all it takes is a little… effort.” He finishes his statement by using his hands to puff up his chest fluff.

“Ain’t that the truth! Men are too easy!” Mimzy snorts, sipping her drink.

“I’ll bet even Niffty hasss a better chance!” Sir Pentious laughs loudly, joining in on the bullying.

As if on queue, Niffty scurries onto the bar, stabbing a roach with a sewing pin, grinning wildly at the roach squirming, before running off to who knows where to do who knows what with the poor insect.

“IIIII don’t know about that… But I’ll definitely put money on Angel failing.” Husk adds, wiping the bar clean from Niffty’s ‘hobbies’.

Angel barks out a laugh “I’ll take ya up on that bet!”

“$20 bucks says you’re gonna be sittin’ here drinkin’ me dry when he rejects your ass.” Husk leaned on the bar, smirking playfully at the porn star.

Angel, leaning in to show he wasn’t backing down, “$50, and loser-” glancing at Pentious, “loSERS treat everyone else to a night on the town.”

Sir Pentious and Husk glance at each other, hesitating, but only briefly before they both slam their hands on the bar dramatically, shouting, “Deal." ]]]

[aphcoolalters]

Were already somewhat aware of how Labby acts towards Alfred, but how does he interact and/or act around other alters? Is there any he's acquainted with? Some he just straight up hates?

P: Okay, okay, you win, we'll tell you about the son of a bitch, I'll go first

P: Labby and I have been friends from the beginning, we even teamed up to play a little prank on Alfred, unfortunately, Alfred returned to the playhouse and Labby, like the big idiot that he is, stayed with him

I like to see what he does with Alfred, it's like watching a show within another show haha ​​gays, Anyway, now it's Alfem's turn

A: WAIT WHAT?! I told you I didn't want to talk about him!

P: I don't care princess, just do it

A: Ah... fine

A: When he saw that I was angry with him, he started acting cuter to me than usual, he even gave me a gift, but I don't think a real heart covered in blood is a gift you would give to your girlfriend, anyway he and I We are no longer boyfriends, I cannot love someone who abandoned me

P: damn why are you so dramatic?

A: I'm not dramatic, I'm just telling the truth.

D: well bitch, more for me

P: ooh dominatrix! Come, tell us what you think of Labby

D: Fuck, Labby is so hot, but for some reason he doesn't want to have me around, I mean, I'm a horny whore who wants to be with him, why is he leaving? I don't understand why he wants to keep trying to make Alfem love him again when he has ME in his clutches

P: stupid bitch... Hey, and where is Chist? I'd love to hear what that moron has to say

C: here I am, I'm everywhere, you know

P: uuuhg, Yes Christ, I know, you say it more than 20 times a day-

C: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

okay that's better

I don't know Labby very well but I think he and Alfred have a great relationship, it's obvious that they love each other a lot, if they got married I would definitely be the-

L: Step aside! I WANT TO TELL SOMETHING

L: I only interacted with Labby once in my life, a while ago I thought it would be a good idea to go out while Labby and Alfred were… AHAM! doing THAT

I thought Labby probably wouldn't notice, but he did and I looked like an idiot when he did it

P: lucifer literally no one asked you

S.Alf: Yes, and not only that day did you look stupid, actually you look stupid every day

Alf.P: you make me sick dude…

L: ALRIGHT! If you think you're so smart, try it yourself

S. Alf: I honestly never had the courage to talk to him

Alf. P: Me neither, he just spends his time sitting on the couch and watching TV

S. Alf: He doesn't seem threatening, just weird, I don't understand why he's still here, he has no affection for Alfred and it bothers me how toxic he is

P: faggots, he's just a fat guy addicted to weed, he's not going to bite you or something like that

L: the egocentric is right

P: Lucifer My God, just close your fucking mouth

[mooncalf87]

Lucifer hcs?

YES 🙏🙏🙏🙏 HE IS MY SECOND FAVORITE I LOVE HIM SO FUCKING MUCCCHHHH

Ep 8 spoilers!

He is a softie for Vaggie, they bond over both being fallen angels

He and Husk fly around together a lot, they don't have a super close bonded friendship, but they enjoy their little outings

Lucifer uses his magic to interfere with Alastors radio broadcasts (Alastor is THIS close to murdering either Lucifer or himself)

He has a pretty short wing span so when he is flying he has to move all his wings pretty fast and usually looks like a humming bird

Is secretly REALLY good at drawing

This mans depression and anxiety levels are off the charts, but they are slowly getting easier to manage now that he is back with Charlie

He never really got to know Sir Pentious, but Lucifer was the one who painted Pentious's portrait after his death

He loves popcorn. It is an unhealthy obsession.

When he has meetings with the Goetia family, he can totally tell that the random IMP sitting on Solas's couch is totally his secret bf

He and Lilith had a INCREDIBLY hard time trying to get Lilith pregnant, due to her being a human soul and him being a heavenly being

He and turn into any animal and sometimes turns into a cat to annoy Husk

He has a very hard time accepting the fact that Lilith isn't just gone for a little while, he still has a hard time admitting that he knows she will never come back

He still wears his wedding ring but Charlie is finally able to get him to take it off

he likes stuffed animals

This bitch can not figure out how to use tape for the life of him. Whenever he tries to use duct-tape he basically just wraps himself in it by accident

He needs his apple cane because he actually sustained a long lasting leg injury during his angelic fall, that he can't heal with his magic (he also hates to talk about it)

Is Chaggies #1 fangirl

Sometimes he dresses up as the apple at Lu Lu World for fun (whenever Charlie asks him why, he says, "its my theme park so I can do what I please")

He likes wood carving in his spare time

Sometimes forgets hes the literal KING OF HELL and is like "?????" When people bow to him on the streets

Even though he is Lucifer himself, he can still get hurt. Charlie HATES it when he bleeds

Dispite their mutual dislike for one another, Lucifer is very greatful Alastor was there for Charlie and her dream when her dad wasn't

Dramatic. This man is the textbook definition of drama. Can gossip for HOURS with Ange

Loves human watching. He can observe earth using his magic, and loves just. Sitting there. Watching humans go about their daily lives

Send me HC asks!!!!!!

[l0vedoe]

I'M BACK I JUST SAW YOUR POST AND IM OVER THE MOOOOONNNNNN, just woke up

Idea 1: we can start it off with angst I woke up and choose misery because it's raining I want to be dramatic whatever

➺A yandere alastor x (whatever angel-reader) x yandere ex- lucifer

➥ I choosed an angel reader so that they will get together with lucifer first

So then Eden was made, lucifer cheated with lilith, went to hell, reader depressed, reader was accused of treason joke. Reader was accused of sneaking lucifer to heaven because she was the one closer to lucifer and Sera the bitch she is, didn't even look through it, they threw reader off of heaven. And she went for a coma for 3days and woke up in alastors place, now at first alastor being alastor he saw reader as for entertainment or food and brought her to the hotel, he started developing feelings when reader was singing my heart will go on or any songs from his era.

Love and kisses ( ˘ ³˘)♥

-🍦anon

This is so good omg, thank you!

Actually, I think I'm gonna change some things like yandere Alastor and Lucifer, because I'm already a little tired of writing yandere, and I want to write some other stuff, you know? And Alastor developing feelings for reader is something I can't see, I can't see Alastor developing feelings for anyone actually, I can do something a little different though

ANYWAY, I really want to use your idea, is there any problem if I ended up changing these things?

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Could you do one with 4,31, and 38

Context: Adam, Lucifer and the rest of the gang are having dinner and someone (maybe alastor) puts angelic poison in Adams tea in an attempt to kill him. Lucifer is quick to “accidentally” knock it over before Adam could drink it, leading it to spill on adam.

(Bonus if Lucifer has a stern talk with alastor, all protective style)

-🐊

4. “When did you fall out of love with me?” “That’s the thing: I never fell out of love with you. You’re the one who fell out of love with me.”

31. “You need to stop being such a dramatic bitch.” “It’s the only way I can entertain myself, okay? Now piss off and leave me be.” 

38. “Remember when you said you’d catch me when I fell? Well, you’re a fucking liar. Figuratively and literally. Now I’m hospitalised and also emotionally scarred. I hope you’re fucking happy about that.” 

Oh ho ho!! I love me some protective Lucifer and Alastor being an antagonizing little shit >:)

Charlie had prepared a beautiful meal for everyone at the hotel. She made a roast with all the veggies you could eat.

Adam was waiting on water to boil so he could have tea with his dinner. "Come on and eat Adam, it'll get cold before the kettle is ready." Lucifer said as he walked with his own plate.

Adam looked between him and the food and yeah, he didn't want to eat cold fucking food. He grabbed his dinner and sat down beside Lucifer and Angel. After a while if eating and talking, Adam remembered his tea. "Shit, my tea."

"No worries, I made some for myself as well. Here you go." Alastor handed Adam a mug of green tea, his smile anything but innocent.

Adam looked at him questioningly. "Um, thanks I guess?" Since when did this Bambi freak go out of his way for Adam?

"Oh don't thank me. Just drink up before it's cold." Like your corpse will be, Alastor thought sinisterly. He hoped he used enough angelic poison.

Adam couldn't feel any heat coming from the mug, he stuck his finger in it and frowned. "It's already cold asshole." He sucked the tea off his finger and grimaced. Did he put fucking sugar in it? Cause it was super sweet.

Lucifer got to looking at Adams tea, his eyes shifted to Alastor who was just waiting for the fallen angel to drink it. When he looked back he saw it.

It would be nearly impossible to see, but the way the light hit his tea Lucifer saw the golden shine that sat on top of the liquid. Angelic poison.

Lucifer's eyes widened in horror as Adam lifted the mug to his lips. "Don't!" He slapped the mug out of Adams hand, making the tea spill all over Adam.

"AHH! What the fuck!?" Adam jolted up and glared, the cold liquid soaking into his clothes.

"Dad!"

"Look, I'm sorry but there was posion in your fucking tea!" Lucifer said as he handed Adam a napkin.

Adam snatched the napkin and tried in vain to clean himself up. "Poison, the fuck are you...." He suddenly felt dizzy, the room started to spin. Adam sat back down and held his head in his hands. If there was poison in his tea, he licked his finger which meant....

"Don't feel well?" Alastor mocked, he may have only gotten a drop but it could be enough to make him terminally ill.

"Fuck off." Lucifer hissed as he put his arms around Adam. "I gotta take him to the fucking hospital. Come on ba- buddy." Lucifer corrected himself. When Adam only groaned and didn't move, he cursed and picked the sinner up in his arms and ran through a portal to the hospital.

Adam didn't know how long he was out, but when he came to he was in a hospital bed with all the tubes anyone could possibly have sticking out of him. "For fuck sakes."

"Thank fuck you're awake." Lucifer sighed in relief from his seat beside Adam's bed. "The doctors weren't sure when you'd wake up."

"Don't you mean 'if' I wake up? Angelic poison is no fucking joke. One big gulp and my insides would have fucking melted and poured out of all my holes." Adam ranted, yeah okay maybe not that bad but still!

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “You need to stop being such a dramatic bitch.”

Adam scoffed and folded his arms. “It’s the only way I can entertain myself, okay? Now piss off and leave me be.” Adam shifted to look away from Lucifer, Woah what medicine were they giving him everything felt funny, like he was kinda high.

"I'm not leaving you alone Adam, you could have died."

"I realize that. Thank you for not letting me die a horrible death." Adam still didn't look at him.

"It would have been a permanent death!"

"Like you care!" Adam finally looked at Lucifer, eyes a blaze.

This took Lucifer aback. "If I didn't fucking care I wouldn't have brought you here, asshole! I fucking love you!"

Adam bit his lip to keep it from quivering. "No you don't...."

"Adam-"

“Remember when you said you’d catch me when I fell? Well, you’re a fucking liar. Figuratively and literally. Now I’m hospitalised and also emotionally scarred. I hope you’re fucking happy about that.” Adam spat as he held tears back. "You never fucking loved me, hell you barely even like me." Hate fucking wasn't love.

"Adam." Lucifer took his hand in his. "I've always loved you."

"Yeah right."

“When did you fall out of love with me?” Lucifer asked, fearing the answer.

Adam looked away, eyes wet. “That’s the thing: I never fell out of love with you. You’re the one who fell out of love with me.”

"That's not true! I never stopped loving you. Adam," Lucifer used his other hand to cup Adam's face and make him look at him. "I've always loved you. I'm sorry I made you feel any different." They placed their foreheads together looking into each other's eyes. "Let me prove it."

Adam searched his eyes for any trace of a lie. "Fine, but this is the last time I will ever trust you with feelings like this." He melted when Lucifer kissed him softly.

"I promise to protect you and your heart."

-

"Alastor!" Lucifer stomped over to the deer demon. The hospital wanted to keep Adam overnight just to make sure he was okay.

"Lucifer, what do I owe the-" Alastor was shoved into the wall behind him.

"You've got some fucking nerve trying to posion him like that." He growled, his eyes going wholly red.

"He's fine isn't he? What's the matter, worried your boy toy wouldn't make it?" Alastor winced when a hand wrapped around his neck.

Lucifer let his full demon form come out. "Listen here you Bambi reject, radio fucker. You so much as even LOOK at Adam wrong from now on and I'll make you drink a whole fucking bottle of angelic poison. Nobody, and I fucking mean NOBODY fucks with the people I love."

Alastor winced in pain but his smile widened. "You love him, huh?"

"Yeah I do. He's the love of my life and no one will come between us again. Stay away from him." Lucifer dropped Alastor and walked away.

Alastor held his throat and smirked. Interesting, very interesting.

[onyourowndaisymae]

obey me demon brothers on road trip

is this original? not even a little bit. but your girl is Burnt Out by life rn and resisting the urge to bury herself in a hole and not emerge for a couple weeks. take this humble offering as a STILL avoid working on requests because i am a menace who deserves to be prodded w a dirty stick

prompt: diavolo's got a fun trip planned. he's invited everyone to meet him on some obscure little beach across the devildom. only issue? it's not accessible by portal-- something or other about the wildlife, barbatos explains. guess that means everyone has to pile in for a long drive. the demon brothers in one car, the purgatory hall group accompanying diavolo and barbatos in the other... what could go wrong?

Lucifer

lucifer drives. there is no debate here on that.

he's got the gps screen in front of him at all times because there's nothing worse for his pride than getting lost and having to... hell forbid... ask for directions.

he controls the music, no exceptions. there is a premade (and preapproved) spotify playlist playing at a decent volume for everyone's listening pleasure. inevitably someone will add something stupid to the playlist (mammon keeps adding yung gravy, asmo added deepthroat inappropriate music, belphie kept adding audiobook recordings of paradise lost) and then lucifer gets pissed off and switches to the radio.

he has a strict stopping schedule for meals and bathroom breaks to ensure they get there on time, with extra time padding for when the plan inevitably goes to shit and they get to their destination four hours later than planned.

Leviathan

levi is sitting in the passenger seat for the drive. lucifer has determined him to be the least annoying for the entirety of the trip, so he sits in the front.

honestly? smart choice. levi spends most of his time curled up with a video game or 10 in silence. he appreciates the space of the passenger seat to spread out and keep his valuables close by. it's quieter up front as well, so he doesn't get overstimulated.

officially restricted to one cupholder. give him an inch and he'll take a mile spreading all of his shit across the car.

the grandmaster of chargers for the car ride. granted, most of them are his for his various consoles, but when mammon inevitably hops in the car with his D.D.D. at 12% battery, levi's the one that gets him a charger.

Asmodeus

asmo is in the second row, seated directly behind lucifer. this spot would have gone to belphie had lucifer not thought about the youngest kicking his seat during the drive just to be a pain.

the seats in the middle are standalone seats with an open aisle. this is good because asmo has spread himself dramatically across his seat and into the aisle.

after mammon, he's the one that gets most bored on the trip. cell service is spotty the entire drive, so his connection isn't good enough to spend the whole time on social media. he's brought a couple of magazines, too, but he gets motion sick if he reads too much in the car.

he eventually falls asleep at an awkward angle. saving grace for everyone else, seeing as they don't have to hear him whine in the car, but when he wakes up with a sore neck and a bad attitude...

Belphegor

belphie's seat is behind levi in the second row. he's banished to this spot so he can't kick lucifer, but also kept close by because everyone knows he'll quietly sleep the trip away anyways.

ideally, he'd pass out right away. but car naps have always proved tricky for him. if he sleeps normally, his head will fall forward and wake him up. he'd love to spread out, but asmo's legs are taking up too much of the aisle. if he leans his seat back, he has to hear mammon bitch and run the risk of getting scolded by lucifer. what's a demon to do?

his solution is to tie his head to the headrest. no, literally.

he takes off his jacket (cardigan? idk what that shit is) and ties it like a blindfold around his eyes. this way, his head won't flop forward and wake him up. oh, reader? does that sound like sensory hell to you? well, i agree. unfortunately for us, belphie passes out right away and sleeps like a corpse in this horrid arrangement the entire ride.

Satan

satan is seated behind asmo on the far left side of the back row. lucifer ensured he stayed in the back row to ensure his own sanity, so that satan wouldn't have the chance to fuck with him as he's driving.

satan hates this arrangement. it's hard to read when you're trapped in the back with beelzebub, who's constantly eating, and mammon, who's constantly bitching. he's moments away from blowing a fuse.

he tries to convince both belphie and asmo to trade spots with him, but neither of them are willing to give up their coveted middle seats, so he gives up.

his best solution is to wear noise cancelling headphones (asmo's suggestion) and bury his head in a book. but if beel elbows him one more time....

Beelzebub

beelzebub is in the middle of the back row. his aisle spot is earned by his size (he needs more leg room) and his penchant for snacking, which is what clutters the ground around asmo and belphie's outstretched legs.

he's pretty content to spend most of the drive snacking and looking out the windows. sure, it's a little cramped, but beel's pretty agreeable when he's fed.

he might doze off a little, but he's so big that when he inevitably slumps on to one of his brothers, they wake him up yelling and complaining.

he will try to talk his way into getting more snacks at every stop. and he usually wins, too, because he's finished everything in the car by that point.

Mammon

mammon is tucked into the back right corner seat behind belphie. this is because he has a knack for pissing lucifer off and nobody wants the car to crash before they even start vacation. shoving him in the back corner is an attempt to make everyone's ride more peaceful.

he spends most of his time on his phone. he cycles through every mobile game you've ever heard off, their knockoffs, and the knockoffs of the knockoffs. mans can't keep himself entertained.

the worst about bathroom breaks. he a) always needs to stop to pee and b) doesn't mention this until he's about to piss himself. it's like having a toddler i swear. and he dilly dallys through wherever they stop. visitor center? he's trying to jiggle the vending machine for free snacks. fast food place? he's trying to convince lucifer to buy him something. gas station? come on lucifer, he needs these gummy worms--!

eventually, mammon just sort of rests his head on the window and lets the bumps in the road turn his brain to soup. can't be bored if you can't think!

[tsukii0002]

I absolutely enjoyed the pagen mc, but that got me thinking..

If you ever gotten to read a percy jackson book, or one of the hero's of Olympis books then you know of the wide array of demi gods

Now I kinda wanna know what if mc was a demi god/goddess. Luke, not only will it unlesh a whole nother truck load of chaos but it would be kinda sorta absolutely hilarious to see the brothers and dateables react to a mc who is sometimes hunter down by greek and or roman monsters.

Mc  turned out to be a demi-god

I haven't read the books, although I've had them on my to-do list for a long time. But a demi-good Mc... I like it 👀. So here we go.

.

.

Levi was furious, how was it possible that any normie had that ace up his sleeve about TSL? His blood boiled, his demonic form had appeared and without hesitation he pounced on Mc with murderous intentions.

Everything happened very fast, he had heard the voices of Mammon and Lucifer yelling at him to stop. But now... He was on his back against the ground immobilized by his hands and feet with the human on him, their eyes shone like molten iron, full of fire and that's when he knew something was wrong. Mc smiled, the wide eyes of all the demons were looking at them.

"Think better before taking up arms against a child of Ares, god of war"

.

.

Everyone sitting quietly, watching MC, Levi still surprised.

Diavolo: so... You are a demi-god...

Mc: yep

Diavolo: ... Did you know Lucifer?

Lucifer: I don't, that information was not anywhere.

Mc: Well, I love my father, but let's be honest, I'm not very proud of what he's done throughout his life... And I don't think he looks good in society neither... He is a little bitch.

Diavolo: ha ha, same.

Everybody: ...

.

.

Satan: *about to explode with anger*

Mc approaches and carries him while hugging him tightly.

Mc: shhh, calm down, count to 100 buddy.

Satan: *slowly calming down as he revels in the embrace*

Mammon: what has just happened?

Asmo: Well, since Satan got angry because MC didn't want to make a pact with him and discovered that physically he can't hurt them... MC has become his personal security line.

Mammon: wow, unexpected.

.

.

Lucifer: why are you so happy Beel?

Beel: *smiling* mc has promised me that they will join the team

Lucifer:  but that is dangerous for a human.

Beel:  Well, didn't they sweep the floor with you in the incident with the grimoire?

Lucifer: *getting red* right... I have forgotten the demi-God topic....

Beel: it's nice to have a work out partner, I mean if they could defeat you it's impossible for them to tire easily.

Lucifer: stop with that Beel...

.

.

Solomon: If you are the child of Ares, you should know Hercules, right?

Mc: Well, about that, he prefers to be called Heracles, and yes, technically he is my uncle.

Solomon: oh, that’s nice, I met him a long time ago.

Mc: I know, he talks about you sometimes.

Solomon: oh, and what did he say about me?

Mc: that you are a nuisance and a pest of sorcerer

Solomon:...

Mc: You don't have a good reputation among the Olympians, to be honest... or among anyone in general.

Solomon: I can't refute that.

.

.

Belphie: *pinned to the attic floor* humans destroyed my life !!!

Mc: well, welcome to the club, humans destroy everything including our own lives!!!

Belphie: let me go, you human!!!

Mc: you just tried to kill me bitch!!!

With a quick movement Mc carried the demon on their shoulders.

Mc: it's over, you and your brothers are going to fucking therapy.

Belphie: what??!!!

Mc: Trust me, I'm part of the most dramatic family ever, and I know you can figure this out.!!!!

Belphie: the what the fuck human??!!!

.

.

Mc locks the brothers in the catacombs so they can talk, without a therapist, Mc was afraid for his life, so another time. They are in the living room when a familiar voice takes him out of his thoughts.

Ares: So I don't see you for a couple of months and you end up in hell? And not in your great-uncle's domain but in another hell?

Mc: dad... What are you doing here?

Ares: I've been looking for you child, you had me worried.

The god sits next to his child.

Ares: How have you been? are you still fighting?

Mc: yeah I suposse, but no one dares to stand up to me after knowing who my father is .

Ares: well that's good... you've had fun, you've explored... i think it's time you come home

Mc: no, I'm going to stay here and I'm going to finish the exchange year.

Ares: Mc...

Mc: I thought it was strange that nobody knew about gods here, but the truth is that I'm glad, here I'm Mc, not Ares' child... So please I want to stay

Ares: Okey, chicks have to leave the nest sometime... So it's okay, but I have one condition...

Mc: what is it?

Ares: *screaming dramatically* I will not accept that none of those demons put a finger on you!!!

Mc: dad!!!!

Ares: No, I know what you are capable of but they have tried to hurt you!!! *summoning his spear* there won't be one left standing

Mc: dad stop!!!

At that moment Diavolo enters randomly

Diavolo: Don't worry Mr. Ares, here we are not interested in harming MC, actually... Have you thought about a possible union between Devildom and Olympus? You know through marriage.

Ares: ...

Mc: ...

Ares: MUCH LESS AM I GOING TO ALLOW MY BABY TO MARRY ANY OF YOU *summoning his biggest spear* I will not tolerate any biblical creature as a couple for my Mc!!!!!

.

.

Mc: And that's how my father almost declared war to the Devildom

Mammon: well... Lord Diavolo had a point...

Mc: what?

Mammon: nothing!  but what matters is that we have fixed our sibling problems and ya have fixed the problems with your father, everything has been solved !!

Belphie: except now all the demons look at MC with much more respect than any of us .

Asmo: it's normal, it was impressive how you stopped your father.

Beel: Your father loves you so much Mc.

Satan: Well, considering that we found out that in addition to being a Demi God, you have angel blood... I'm not surprised.

Levi: you are like the protagonist of an anime lol.

Lucifer: *sighs* and I thought that this was going to be a quiet year.

.

.

What did I just write??? 😂 😂 I wanted it to be similar to the format of the pagan Mc post, but it has gone more to the AU branch in my opinion... I have chosen Ares because of a myth in which this god defends his daughter after being abused , so I think he would be a good father (for what the Greek gods are)

I hope you liked it even a little, because it is a very good suggestion and it has been fun, thanks @shota-catziwa for your patience, for your suggestion and for reading this far.

.

[obey-me-hoe]

Mephistopheles and Thirteen as songs from my comfort playlist:

*Disclaimer: my criteria for this was all over the place. Some are because of the lyrics, some are based on vibes, and some my brain just said choose that one 😬 (all the OM! songs are in the playlist too but obviously they don't count)

(This song has bad bitch™ vibes and Mephisto is definitely a bad bitch™. I just imagine him walking all sassy with his cane to this song and occasionally twirling it like the dramatic ass bitch he is. My Mephisto phase is in full swing oop)

(This reminds me of his high standing within the devildom that he doesn't let anyone forget. He's confident, maybe even too confident at times but I still love him anyway)

(This has the same vibes as the last one)

(This makes me think of Mephisto's kinda stuck up attitude he had when he was first shown)

(This song fits his vibes. The song also talks about colors relating to things like heaven and hell so that's an added bonus. Tbh this song just reminds me of Toji Fushiguro from JJK 😭)

(Mephisto definitely knows how to ballroom dance since he's a noble and the song talks about two people dancing together and having fun and I feel like that's something that he wants but he's so busy worrying about his duties as a noble that he hasn't gotten to experience it yet. Something tells me Mephisto just needs some love 🥺 The song also says don't be afraid to let loose and have fun which is something Mephisto definitely needs to learn. I wanna see this man as happy as can be)

(This song gives off the vibes of "I'm a bad bitch just try and tell me what to do I dare you" which seems very Thirteen. This really only applies when she's been pissed off otherwise she's usually pretty chill)

(The beat of this song makes me think of Thirteen but not necessarily the lyrics)

(This song is about being determined and having pride in your abilities which I feel like fits Thirteen. She knows she's good at her job and is determined to get Sol's soul someday. I feel like she'd like the beat)

Combined OM! Playlist

Mephisto & Thirteen Playlist

Other versions:

Lucifer, Mammon, Levi, Satan, Asmo, Beel, Belphie, Diavolo, Barbatos, Solomon, Simeon, Luke & Raphael

[misc-obeyme]

☄️:

Hey CC! Are you caught up to nb normal lessons? Today I read a very angsty fic based on a idea from nb and I am not caught up to the lessons. I stopped playing after a while. The last scene i remember is maybe Diavolo giving trial to prove that he is suitable to be next in line for king position

And that fic oh my , oh my god let me tell you 😭 if it is even closely related to canon than I might cry so hard

Can you give a basic run down on the lessons after the Diavolo trial one?

Hi there, ☄️ anon!

I am indeed fully caught up! I read them the day they came out lol. I know I have probably gained some new followers in the months since we last had regular lesson releases, so here's my chance to tell you all about the lesson recap posts that I do!

After every lesson, I write a recap post about that lesson! I do it as soon as possible after reading the lesson so it can be my unfiltered thoughts. Since I noticed that sometimes my opinion can be influenced by other people if I read fandom reaction before writing my own. Back when we had season two happening, I was posting one a week lol.

They started out as short reactions, but evolved into slightly more in depth posts. And most of them have screenshots! They're not exactly summaries, since I'm mostly just reacting to what I read. But I think a lot of info can be had from them, too.

You can read them all here on my newly created post for the masterlist!

That being said, the lesson you're talking about is Lesson 14, where Diavolo does the trial. That was still part of season one, so I'm not sure if you're just looking for a summary of season one or if you want season two as well? I'm gonna put it all under this read more though because of spoilers:

So basically, after the trial, Raphael shows up and tells the brothers that the Celestial Realm wants them to come back. And if they don't, the CR will consider it an act of war. This is because the brothers have become figures of power in the Devildom and the CR believes that tips the scales of power between the two realms unfairly. You can read those lesson recap posts if you wanna hear me bitch about it lol.

Anyway, the brothers all decide they don't want to leave Satan behind because he wouldn't be able to go with them. Lucifer really goes through it despite this because he's thinking about sending all his brothers back, but staying in the Devildom with Satan himself. They don't want him to do that, but he's dumb and tends to do whatever he thinks is best without consulting anybody. Anyway, he talks a bit about what it was like when Satan was "born" and then he straight up apologizes to his bros which shocked me.

That's basically it. There's a HUGE spoilery reveal in the hard lesson twenty, but I'm not sure how much info you want. But basically, the CR is just like okay we'll take your decision into consideration, but they never actually start a war or anything.

Okay so then in season two, MC and Solomon start losing their magic. Like it's still there, but it's significantly less powerful. And so MC has to ramp up the plan to get pacts with all the bros. So then we go through each of the bros where they kinda have an episode where they succumb to their sin. We learn a lot about the Little Ds, who are needed for MC to enter the mind of the brother who is afflicted at the time. They go into their mind and basically do some classic MC therapy, which helps that brother to overcome whatever thing they're having an issue with. Then they make a pact with MC.

Unsurprisingly, Lucifer's turn at this is the most dramatic of all. It involves going into the Underworld (which is connected to the Devildom, but is separate), to a place called Cocytus (the hall is built on top of it). Lucifer gets chained up. This all happens because of the CR who apparently consider Cocytus to be part of their domain. There's a bunch of nonsense and shenanigans but basically, Lucifer gets free and MC makes a pact with him. Cocytus Hall is destroyed in the process, but they build Purgatory Hall in its place.

Then they have the RAD founding ceremony, but partway through some kinda portal opens in the sky. Solomon says they have to use that portal to get back to their own time, which MC manages to do by using the power of all seven brothers.

And that's it. Hard lesson confirms that we're either back in our own time or at least in a different timeline from the one we were in originally. I'm hoping it's not a whole new timeline because the time travel bs is really getting out of hand.

Anyway, that's the gist of it! I left out a lot, of course, so if you want more details, I suggest reading through some of my recap posts!

I don't think any of this was super dramatic, so I'm not sure how divergent the fic you read was. But I hope this helps!

[avionvadion]

Hey so I finally have my thoughts together enough to talk about that Lucifer/El fic you posted. I ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT! A Lucifer almost completely eaten by his introspective thoughts x El who is able to keep him grounded in reality? A match made in Heaven (or Hell technically lol). And I saw that ask where El sasses Adam for losing his first wife to Lucifer and I gotta say, I just need more of El's sass and Adam being a whiny lil bitch who threatens things when he doesn't get what he wants. It was amazing lol. Also, I actually really liked the song you made for Lucifer! Did you have any musical style in mind when you wrote it, or are you just leaving it up to our imaginations? Either way, I really enjoyed it and would love it if you wrote more, if that's the way the muse takes you! Absolutely no pressure though, I just would like more if that's what you feel like writing right now lol.

*screeches excitedly jogging tiptoes around kitchen counter while a grilled cheese cooks*

Thank youuuuuuuu!!!!!! It was so hard, haha. I did like three or four versions of the song (and each were WAY different than how it actually ended up) and in one El fell alone on the pile of gold while Lucifer transformed into a giant serpent and “ate” whatever demonic sillouhettes tried to approach her, and then he transformed back and plopped his legs on her lap like a sassy boi while she’s just like O.o

It got so chaotic, but I didn’t like how the lyrics were so I kept changing it. It’s supposed to be a bit of a jazzy waltz tune that speeds up into a bop??? But I only know how to play music, writing it is so much harder, lol

And yesssss~ Lucifer gets so lost sometimes that he starts to dissociate and El is just like, “Hey, it’s okay. Breathe. Your daughter still loves you. It’s gonna be alright.”

Lucifer, laying dramatically across her lap like it’s a soap opera: “Everthing is HORRIBLE.”

El: “Charlie’s nice?”

Lucifer, immediately excited and sitting up, a proud papa: “HELL YEAH SHE IS. MY DAUGHTER’S THE BEST.”

Lowkey, El wouldn’t like to hear about Lucifer’s ex (just makes her feel uncomfortable and a little unworthy since he’s the literal KING of Hell and Lilith is fucking gorgeous; how can she compete with that? But it’s fine, she knows it’s just her self loathing/anxiety trying to get the better of her) but she would absolutely bring her up to mess with Adam any chance she got.

I think it’d be funny if/when Adam finds out El is dating Lucifer he tries to shit talk him and build himself up, being all, “Bitch you don’t know what you’re missing” and she’s just like, “Nah, no thanks, I like the short king, he’s cute.”.

Adam: “EXCUSE ME? I’M CUTE AS FUCK. FAR CUTER THAN THAT PIECE OF-“

El: *immediately starts gushing about Lucifer just to aggravate him*

Adam, greatly disturbed: “MA’AM WHAT THE HELL.”

El: “Also, he doesn’t call me Bitch. Damn, no wonder your wife left you for him.”

Adam: “YOU FUCKING BITCH-“

El: *starts singing So What by P!nk but changing the lyrics so it’s technically from Adam’s PoV. He grows increasingly more pissed. Charlie and Sera have to run intervention so he doesn’t kill her* “Guess I just lost my first wife, I dunno where she went! So I’m gonna drink my money, I’m not gonna pay her rent!”

Doesn’t even get very far in the song, haha.

I think at one point El will just start singing Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing at Adam and/or the other angels. Probably during the council or after. I dunno, I’m just throwing ideas.

“So could you~ tell me, how you’re sleeping easy thinking only of yourself? Show me how you justify~ telling all your lies like second nature!? Listen! Mark my words one day~ you will pay, you will pay! Karma’s gonna come collect your debt!”

That said. A damn shame we didn’t get Adam singing “Stick it to the Man” from School of Rock. 🤣