#Little boys who suffered a lot yearn for soft things the most
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oranjeleeuw · 1 year ago
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Enchanted is so Toro Rosso Versainz coded
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buckyownsmylife · 3 years ago
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Girl That You Love - Bucky Barnes x Reader x Steve Rogers smut
The one where there's a threesome on a mission.
Warnings: smut, punishment, oral sex (m), dom!stucky, asphyxiation on dick, p in v, subspace, double penetration, anal, name-calling,  dacrophylia, threat of noncon?, but most likely cnc, references to suicidal behavior
Word count: 1.5k
A/N: this was requested a while ago. Thank you to the lovely @sinking-in-mercury​ for helping me make it better.
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We barely made it inside the cabin when Steve’s voice reverberated on the wooden walls. “Kneel,” he ordered, and I turned around to find him staring at me with icy cold eyes I barely recognized as his.
I knew I had fucked up. The mission had been a disaster on all ends, but he didn’t care about his own mistakes at a time like this. We had an entire evening to kill before the quinjet could come pick us up, and I knew I’d have to suffer through a lot of punishment before the light of morning appeared again.
I heard fumbling behind me, but couldn’t find the courage I needed to look for Bucky. Steve was staring, waiting for me to follow his orders, and if I made it obvious that he wasn’t the only thing in my mind, I’d be in even deeper troubled waters.
And so I sank to my knees, sitting back on my legs as I made quick work of his suit’s pants to expose his gorgeous cock to me. No matter how long I was with them, the sight of their members would still frighten just as much as they excited me.
The head was red and throbbing, much like Steve’s temples as he waited for me to get on with it already. I wanted to look around for Bucky so badly, but I resisted the temptation as I leaned closer and engulfed his dick with my lips, making sure to keep my hands behind my back so I wouldn’t piss off my captain even further.
Any time Steve played the bad cop, James would be there to calm him down, counter each rough action with a sweet movement, and I missed that now. I wanted to feel his fingers massaging my scalp, his soft voice urging me to take Steve even deeper, to let him fuck my throat fully.
But he didn’t seem to be near us, and that scared me. The disappointed expression on his face when he saw just how narrowly I had escaped death in that old factory was all I could think about.
So I tried to focus on Steve and his pleasure. He wasn’t giving me any signs of it, knowing how much I enjoyed hearing his moans and grunts, but just the sight of his sculpted body paired with the taste of his skin was enough to have me dripping.
And that’s when I felt it. That familiar tingle up my spine, the rush of being watched by a predator. Bucky was near, I instinctively knew it before he even pulled me by my hair so I’d release Steve and leaned over me, devouring my lips in an upside-down kiss.
This wasn’t soft, or sweet, or even kind. It was a show of possession that invaded every part of my soul, leaving me soft and pliant under his fingers, exactly how he wanted me to be. I could only ever get this way when both of them had their hands on me.
Without any sort of preamble, he pushed me back onto Steve’s dick, gagging me against it with the help of the grip he had on my head. The sounds of my suffocation only had them laughing, and I was relieved when he relented and let go of the back of my neck, but that was only until I felt his hands gripping my ankles.
I knew what was coming before Steve’s hands held my chest. They’d done this before, but still, my heartbeat spiraled out of control once I was suspended in the air, mouth still filled with Steve’s cock when Bucky’s entered me from behind.
My desire skyrocketed. There was just something about the rush of adrenaline that being on these men’s hands caused me… It got to me every time.
I knew they’d never let me fall. But the uncertainty caused by the position was still there, and it just had me falling into subspace that much quicker.
They moved in silence, grunts barely audible as they each pulled me in different directions to use my body in search of their releases, knowing how much I loved to hear any sounds that escaped from them. By the time Steve finally pulled me off of his cock, pushing me into Bucky’s arms, who then turned me around so I could face him, there were tears and spit running down my face, yet I didn’t make any move to brush them off.
They liked it, and I didn’t want to do anything else to disappoint them today.
I felt Steve approach me from behind before I felt his fingers brushing the hair away from my back so he could deposit a kiss on one of my shoulders.
A soft gesture, gentle, even, but I couldn’t be fooled. I knew my boys too well by now. This was only the calm before the storm.
“I hope you’re ready, princess,” his tone putting an icy cast on the usually sweet pet name. “By the time we’re done with you, you won’t be able to walk for a week straight.”
I screamed as he penetrated my other hole, my head falling back on his shoulder as his hands took a hold of my hips laying over where Bucky’s already were holding. I’d taken both of them enough times to be able to handle being used like this, but the stretch and burn of being filled so completely never fully went away, regardless of how frantically they fucked me.
Bucky was watching my blissed out face with darkened eyes by the time I was able to open mine again, a dangerous smirk taking over his expression. I knew I wouldn’t like what he was going to say.
“You know she enjoys this,” he addressed Steve, although his gaze remained on me, “the little whore.” The comment felt like a slap to the face, I was never used to hearing them address me as anything other than the loveliest pet names.
Except in times like these. Times when I disappointed them, made their stomachs churn with fear and angst, thinking I’d left them for good, thinking I was dead.
Was it weird that I silently thrived on it? Bucky wasn’t wrong. I loved when they treated me like this, like I was disposable, used me for their pleasures without caring about how it would impact me.
Ironically, it only ever happened when they were reminded of how much they couldn’t live without me.
“Just like she enjoys making us suffer,” Bucky continued, nothing but spite and anger in his gaze and tone. “Making us worry about her…” I yearned for a kiss, something soft in the midst of all of the roughness, even if I did love the roughness.
It was the beauty of times like these - they made me cherish what I usually took for granted, what I could have at any time.
“What do we have to do to get you to learn, huh?” Steve’s hands around my neck as he breathed out the question against my skin had me releasing a loud moan - louder than I usually felt comfortable letting escape. However, we were all alone in this safe house, with no one to hear my delicious torture for miles and miles, and I knew my boys would take advantage of that.
“Do we have to make you cry?” Steve insisted, other hand sneaking around my body to circle my clit, making my thighs tremble as I did begin to cry, desperate for a release I knew they wouldn’t grant me. “Fuck you until you pass out and then continue to use you?”
The suggestion shouldn’t have made me so aroused, but it did. It did and they both knew it, so they continued, “So you’ll wake up covered in our cum, drowning in it, knowing that we took full advantage of this body that you’re so careless of?”
Punishment be damned, I came with a scream. As my walls contracted around them, I heard them curse, hips losing control as they too were brought to their releases because of me.
I whimpered when they both pulled away, hiding my face in Steve’s neck as he carried me in his arms to the bed we’d all have to share. I don’t think any of us minded the prospect, even if it wasn’t what the people who designed the safe house probably intended it for.
Two hands brushed the hair off my face as I was deposited on Bucky’s lap. Groggily, I struggled to open my eyes and focus on him after being fucked so brutally. “Sweetheart, pay attention to me.”
His tone didn’t leave space for any arguments.
“Will you promise to be good from now on?” He questioned. “Obey our orders?” But I was too out of it to answer them. At my innocent silence, Steve sighed, sitting by our side and grabbing my jaw so I’d look at him.
“Honey, we are so in love with you.” I sighed happily at the words, making him smile at my visible comfort around their presence. “And we need you here, with us. For as long as possible. So we need you to learn to be afraid of death. Okay?”
And as I considered not being in their arms right then, but in the cold, hard ground of the battlefield, bleeding out, I swear that I began to know that fear.
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namfinessed · 4 years ago
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a little bit of love - k.th.
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genre : fluff, angst (3.5k+) (request for @ofrosesandteacups) thank you so much for requesting, i hope you like it :]
summary : there’s nothing that freaks you out more than love does.
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when you first met taehyung, you didn’t imagine how far you guys would come along, sure you liked him from how your friends described him and how he presented himself to the masses, but to come to a point where a day wouldn’t go by without you missing him even as he sat beside you, was beyond you.
you almost felt ridiculous for cuddling up even more to him just at the thought of him being gone for work the next day making him chuckle and gently pat your head. the tv played some old 80’s movie that taehyung loved and served as ambient music which was both romantic and full of yearning. just like the two of you sat in front of it.
“what’s got you like this?” he gestured to your arms that looked close to suffocating his torso but you didn’t weaken your grip, only burying your head in his chest even more.
“you’ll be gone all day tomorrow” you softly whined, your voice coming out muffled and just clear enough for taehyung to hear and he let out a sigh at your words. it was going to be so hard to go to work tomorrow, how could he possibly say goodbye to you for a whole 24 hours after you do and say the things you do?
“i promise i’ll make it up to you, we can go to dinner at that diner you like this weekend” taehyung offered, hoping that would lift your spirit up a little and you nodded happily, any time with him was perfect for you.
“deal” you whispered and before taehyung could ask you about which movie you wanted to start next, he heard your slow, even breaths fill the silence and he simply let a fond smile grace his face, as he shut the tv off and devoted his entire attention to watch you sleep. not in a creepy way, in more of a ‘you’re so fucking cute, i would die for you’ way.
and it was in that moment, your arms never losing their tight grip on him, your nose twitching ever so often in your sleep and your legs wrapped around his, taehyung decided that he was helplessly in love with you and that conclusion only solidified for him when he reached to kiss your forehead, he still felt his body erupt in tingles, these tingles that he gets whenever he’s with you haven’t died since the day, he’s met you.
taehyung was in love. and he wanted to shout it from any building in the world.
-
you kicked the blanket around your feet as you tossed and turned to avoid the sunlight burning your eyes awake, and with one final groan, you pushed yourself up to lay on your elbows as you cursed everything about the day when its barely begun. you saw taehyung’s side of the bed empty and sighed, you remembered how warm he felt last night, and how his voice put you right to sleep, your cheeks warmed as your mind travelled to how he promised you his weekend just so you wouldn’t be sad and your heart did a good old flip as you continued to think about him.
you heard yeontan yapping at your feet, waiting for you to give him all your attention and love, you gave the cheery dog a soft smile before scooping him up in your arms and letting him lick all over your face while you giggled and tilted your head away from his sloppy kisses, once he finally calmed down, you just buried your face into his fur and realized yeontan only reminded you more about taehyung.
this was going to be a long day without him.
you could feel your stomach drop a little at the sad realization and you deemed it so unfair that you couldn’t spend every minute of your life with hi-
wait a minute.
it hasn’t even been 8 hours since you last saw him so why were you acting like his funeral was tomorrow? why did you miss him so much when you were literally in his arms not too long ago?
your head snapped up as you caught yourself thinking that as your legs flung over the side of the bed, your eyes widened at your own thoughts. any and all romance draining out of your body, as familiar dread and paranoia took its place.
where was all this coming from?
the last time you felt like this, was in grade school, when you still wore a little skirt and tie, and sat at the bleachers as you watched your then-boyfriend with flushed cheeks and giddy eyes, play basketball, he would always take the ball, give you a cocky smirk and say, ‘this one’s for you’, only for the ball to always fall to the side instead of into the hoop. you would just give him an awkward smile and slow applause, maybe you should’ve taken that missed shot as a sign that your relationship would end in disaster.
because all the while you adored and gave him heart eyes, he would smile right at your face, only to send a wink and smirk to someone else over your shoulder.
and now, after all these years, you gave those same lovesick eyes to taehyung. and you could feel your palms getting sweaty just at the thought of your relationship ending the same way.
of course, you knew better, you’ve come a long way since school, done a lot of growing up, and now, you were confident in yourself and you were almost completely sure that taehyung never did that. almost.
but how much did you see? maybe you missed it at some point. you let out a loud groan and fell back on the bed with hair everywhere on your face.
fuck, you were royally screwed.
it wasn’t even noon and your mind was hell bent to make this your worst day.
how could you think of taehyung like this? sweet, kind taehyung, who’s giving you his weekend, taehyung who always kisses you on the forehead at night when he thinks you’re sleeping, taehyung who defended mint chocolate with an adorable pout on his face, taehyung who cooed and played with every baby he saw, taehyung who knew everything about you, the good and the ugly, and still stayed, and most importantly, taehyung who loved you.
he loved you, it was no secret. boy was as whipped as they come, and anyone with two eyes could see it and he didn’t have to say it to you for you to know, you just knew that he loved you, he trusted you enough to introduce you to his dog and that was a very big deal to him (you quote, ‘it’s like you’re meeting my parents’).
and that scared you, because holy shit, this man is ready to give you the world but would you ever be able to carry everything he gives you? were you ready to admit to yourself that you would give him twice the world he gives you because that’s how precious he is to you?
you aren’t ready.
and you don’t think you ever will be.
maybe you should’ve gone to therapy for your commitment and trust issues when you were still in university because you definitely regretted flipping the finger to your kind on-campus counsellor now (she was actually very condescending and forced you to talk about your problems instead of easing into it like a good counsellor would so fuck her but you were still on that train of hating yourself, weren’t you?). it was almost like you never thought your issues would come back to bite you in the ass.
whatever, you can push this under the rug like you always have. it should be fine, it’s the way you have always dealt with, push it under the rug or run away from it.
and you know how ridiculous your thoughts are right now, you couldn’t possibly run away from taehyung, because here you were, all dressed up in a baby blue dress with your hands occupied in three large bags of takeout food for the hardworking boys in the practice room in front of you. and yes, you also know how pathetic it is to be so scared of being in love with this man and then coming right back to him because what if he missed his lunch? (you just wanted to see his face and no, you couldn’t go an entire day without him).
you sheepishly poked your head in and saw all of them scattered around the room, their heads snapping towards the now open door and you quickly looked for your man in the crowd, only to find him already looking at you with surprise evident in his eyes and a confused but lovely broad grin on his face as he happily skipped to you, pulling you in and closing the door behind you, almost immediately enveloping you in a warm hug.
“what are you doing here?” he happily sighed into the crook of your neck, and you could feel your heart stutter a little at the clear joy in his tone. you pulled away from him to lift the bags in your hands up.
“thought that you could use some food” you tilted your head to look at everyone else, giving them a shy smile and bow, taehyung looking at you with those eyes that he seemed to always look at you these days.
those lovesick eyes.
“fuck i love you” he chuckled slightly, grabbing the bags from your hands and walking away to set them on a table, not noticing how wide your eyes have gotten or the panic in your face as he said it.
he finally said the words you’ve been both dreading and longing to hear, and in such a casual way, you knew he just said it in a playful way for all the food you brought in but that didn’t mean your heart didn’t drop to your ass when you heard them. you snapped out of your trance when your ears caught them call you in a chorus, ushering you over to them.
“everything okay?” he whispered just low enough for you to hear, making sure that it didn’t catch anyone else’s attention. and as much as you wanted to fall on him and tell him everything your mind was putting you through, you gave him a tight smile and nodded your head.
you quietly walked up to them and only spoke when you were spoken to, a little too lost in yourself, looking to the side when taehyung nudged your elbow a little. you were never this silent, you were always bubbling with things to say or you made some dry jokes about your own suffering that had the whole room laughing, but right now, you just weren’t you. and that worried him.
“of course, i am always okay” you let out a nervous chuckle slip past your lips as you said it, cursing yourself for the slight break in your tone.
you weren’t okay.
you weren’t okay at all.
and taehyung knew that.
you could tell he wasn’t convinced at all with your answer so you just sighed and decided to come clean.
“we will talk about this later, okay? it isn’t anything bad, but it isn’t necessarily good either” you rambled silently, and taehyung, though unconvinced and worried sick now, nodded in agreement, giving you a side hug and kiss to your temple making your heart wrench in place even more.
“you know i love you, right? and that you can tell me anything?” you knew.
that was the problem.
you fucking knew he loved you and you didn’t know how to handle that.
but until your inevitable discussion later, you just leaned in for a kiss on his cheek making his cheeks flush and hurt a little at the almost immediate smile that grew on his face.
“aw look at them being all cute” jimin cooed from where he stood, clearly not having noticed the prior tense environment around the two of you.
“i’m telling you, it’s the honeymoon phase. they’ll be at each other’s throats soon” jungkook snickered harmlessly, as the others argued that you both have been in this honeymoon phase since forever now and it didn’t seem to go away anytime soon. and you turned red as they all continued to tease the two of you, making lighthearted jokes at how whipped you were and you didn’t have it in you to laugh like you usually would.
with jungkook and everyone else around you, people who you have become so comfortable with, it was all too overwhelming, you fit in so well, almost too well and that was one more thing for you to worry about.
when did you start feeling so at home with all of these people?
and why did spending lunch with them feel so normal all of a sudden?
you usually had lunch at your workplace with your friends, and you wouldn’t say you enjoyed it very much, because most of the time, you all were too exhausted to hold fun conversations, so it was all a very monotonous routine. but now, with taehyung and rest of them, you could feel bubbling energy every second you spent with them and it just felt so perfect.
but did it feel that way for them? or were you just intruding on their normal routine?
after a silent excuse to leave to work early and way too quick of a goodbye, you left with an even heavier mind than the one you spent all morning with. and even if you thought you were being subtle, your sour mood caught the attention of everyone in the room who were more concerned than you thought they would be.
“are you ready to tell me what’s going on with you?” taehyung walked in your apartment to see you slumped on the sofa, eyes teary with your focus on the tv which played somber ending music to a show (you weren’t crying because of the show, you were crying because oh my fucking god did you hate being you at that very moment, you were wallowing in self pity and with thoughts that you’ll die alone and loveless with around 20 cats, you even placed an order for catnip and bed impulsively for a cat you didn’t even own). you were doing great, clearly.
you couldn’t delay this conversation anymore without hurting either of you two even more.
“huh?” you sniffed, turning to see him pulling his coat off while keeping his narrowed and concerned eyes on you, you have never heard that tone on taehyung or seen him so agitated in a while.
at least both of them were never directed at you.
he dropped down next to you on the sofa, pulling the large bag of chips from your arms and setting it aside before looking right at you, refusing to break eye contact, leaving you to be the one to break it off with a sigh.
“i’m going to need you to listen to me without saying anything for the next 10 minutes because this is really hard for me to talk about, and i am not even sure what my actual problem is, i just don’t feel okay and i think i’m going to explode any second” you rambled, clearing your throat awkwardly at the end and crossing your arms across your chest like you were trying to protect yourself from your own words.
taehyung had never you seen this vulnerable, with your red-rimmed eyes, quivering lips and a loose sweater hanging off your shoulders, refusing to look at him, instead focusing on the socks adorning his feet and voice coming out in quiet gasps and whispers that he could barely hear.
you looked so fragile, so close to breaking to him. and that broke him too.
“whatever it is, we will figure it out together” he softly let out, forcing your arms out of the hold it had over your chest and tenderly grasping onto your hands, it made you feel exposed, even more vulnerable than you already were.
“i told you to be quiet” you choked out in a groan, tears pricking your eyes and he immediately cooed, rubbing the back of your hands and assuring that you now have the complete room to yourself.
“you know how things are going so well for us? like we spend at least 5 days in a week together and we’ve introduced each other to our friends and we’ve spoken briefly to each other’s parents too?”
“yeah, we’re obsessed with each other god.”
“taehyung?”
“yeah?”
“shut up.”
“okay” he chuckled and gestured for you to continue, making you smile a little too.
“i just feel like everything is going so well, and i feel so happy, so comfortable, i feel like i’m at a place in my life that i’ve been running towards my whole life but now that i’m actually here, i feel…scared?” taehyung raised an eyebrow at the end of your sentence, but not questioning anything because you continued your worried rant.
“it’s like, everything about you and your life has fit in so perfectly with mine, even with your busy schedule and my pain-in-the-ass work hours, we somehow make it work but i’m scared that it will all just go away at some point and i’ll be back at square one. i’ve never felt like this before, i love you, a lot and i love everything about us, i’m so happy with how we are, i just need reassurance that we will stay like this for as long as we can be, that’s all” you let out a deep breathe you didn’t know you were holding and looked at him nervously, chewing your bottom lip and you were sure that you bit it too hard. your heart pounded so hard, it felt like it was going to escape the cage of your chest.
“first off, stop biting your lip like that, you’re going to split it open and second, i love you too and third, is that it? you’re scared that we won’t last?” taehyung looked at you in disbelief that you would even think that you could get rid of him as his hands tightened around your own.
“and that you will leave me for someone else” you sighed out, figuring that it was best to just lay it all out there while you’re at it. taehyung just looked down and shook his head, as if he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“you really don’t have a clue of how in love i am with you, do you?” you slowly shook your head at his rhetorical question.
“well, i guess i have to remind you. you have nothing to worry about when it comes to us, okay? whatever we are, and whatever we will become, i promise to try my best to always make it work for us, because just like you said, i love us and i love you. and if you don’t know what to do, we can figure it out together, i haven’t been in many relationships either, at least not meaningful ones so i have no clue but together, we can do anything, yeah?” he waited for your nod which came shortly after his words, you didn’t even realize you were crying until taehyung reached up to rub your tears away gently with his thumb, all while holding a soft smile to you.
“i love you, okay? and i am not going anywhere, i don’t want to be anywhere else so next time you feel like this, don’t suffer alone, come to me and we can either cry together or i can kiss your tears away, whichever works for you, though i would prefer the k-“ he was cut short when you literally threw your body on top of his, he immediately broke into a small giggle, reaching to wrap his arms around you too.
“i think you liked the kisses idea” he lightly teased making you laugh and mumble a low ‘shut up’ into his hoodie.
“do you promise? that we’ll try till we can’t?” you leaned back with glassy eyes and he smiled, nodding his answer.
“i promise, now you shut up and come back here” he pulled you back so that you would fall with your head nestled into his neck again.
“oh, one thing” he spoke up again and you let him continue.
“can you bring us lunch more often? because they all seem to love you more than they love me” he pouted a little, recounting how everyone rushed to ask him if everything was okay with you after practice was over and you smiled a little, feeling a little stupid for worrying so much about intruding on them.
“of course, as long as i get to see you” you jokingly blew him a kiss to which he reacted with an equally dramatic reaction, clutching his chest and scrunching his eyes shut, acting like he got shot and falling off the couch, the silence being filled with your loud laughs.
and that is how you end all your nights with him, filled with joy, and filled to the brim, with love.
turns out you didn’t need therapy after all.
but what were you going to do with all that catnip now?
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its-me-im-coraline · 3 years ago
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A push to the right direction // Victoria De Angelis
words // 1241
warnings // maybe a little cursing, was meant to be a little angsty but I don't think i succeeded in that
pairing // Victoria De Angelis x GN!Reader
author's note // if you want to be on the tag list let me know. again, for the millionth time, don't forget that sundays will be for "sleepovers" from now on, so I can have a bit of a break and still give you guys something so yay. also this originally was supposed to be out yesterday but toothace and all I could barely function at all sooooo yeah. I hope you enjoy the little beach vibes and locked in car scenrio 😂
request // yes, it was through messages by @tabi-toast so i'm putting it here
"I’d like to request some friends to lovers with Vic where the boys notice that they like each other and try to push them towards each other? Maybe some angst but mostly lots of fluff hehehe"
summary // Victoria and reader have been friends for a while, both harboring unspoken feelings. While the two are oblivious beyond their minds the boys of the band have figured out all the glances and sublte touches the two share. Well, all they need is a little push to see the truth.
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It was simply agonizing. The way the two looked at each other lovingly, staring with adoration every time they were sure they would not get caught, the way they spoke of each other, constantly using the fondest of words… They were both suffering from the unspoken feelings, the constant emotion of (non existent, really) rejection making the bad days harder and the good days bad, taking away from the most important moments they shared. The friends they shared were surely close to taking off, not wanting to see the constant pinning and insecurities that come with it.
The pair tended to be so oblivious to the obvious. Writing off indications of romantic feelings as plain signs of the comfort they had with each other. The hugs, the cuddles, the hair petting, all the pet names, the spontaneous 1 am singing competitions in the car while driving to find some food. They wrote it off as plain and simple platonic affection.
But, after, as the times passed by and the two would not seem to understand the feelings they shared, they would each go to a different member, complaining and even crying about the lack of reciprocation.
“How can you know that, Y/N? You haven’t even told her!”
“Well, I know her! She doesn’t want me Thomas!”
A similar scenarios would apply to Victoria sharing her feelings. They were both so blinded by fear of losing each other that they were blind to the truth. But everyone with eyes was not. Everyone, even people that had never met them before, could see that they were dying to be together, sometimes even assuming that they are… But that only ever resulted in awkward denying and later crying over the non existent rejection.
Currently they were laying on a towel at the beach, cuddled up together while relaxing with the last sun rays of the day and the soft sound of waves. The entire group had decided that a beach day was long overdue, the pool just simply not satisfactory enough. It was not the same to be by the sea, with the waves and the beautiful view, and being by a pool with the superficial lights and all (not that they could really complain).
“So, you mean to tell me that it actually happened?!” Yelled Y/N, laughing at yet another story Victoria shared with them.
“It did! I swear!” Victoria laughed back, caressing Y/N’s back softly as they both laughed.
“Well you need to take me with you next time you visit that place again. Who knows? Maybe another incident like that will happen.”
“I surely will,” she said, leaving a soft kiss on their heads.
“Are you feeling tired, amore?”
“Maybe a little… I had a long day…”
“You can take a nap on me if you need to. I’ll wake you up before Thomas and Damiano go to get us food.”
“I suppose I could,” they responded and settled in for a small nap.
The rest of Måneskin simply stared at the pair while discussing how exactly they were not one. It seemed so obvious to them how they had strong feelings, undeniable ones at that, and they could not stand and watch. Something had to happen.
So they came up with a devious plan. It would piss off Victoria a bit but it would bring the results they needed. Damiano walked to the car they came in, thanking technology with all of his might, in his head, remembering how his car has child-proofing mechanisms at the doors so they can only open from the outside. Thus the plan was in action.
After coming back he simply settled down, going back to doing his own thing - whatever he was doing before and waiting until it was time to move forward with it.
“Agh, I’m starving! When are you guys going for the food?”
“Me too.” Thomas stated before settling back in his chair for a moment.
“Hey, Vic!” He almost yelled, the woman flinching and checking to see if he woke Y/N up.
“What is it Thomas?” her voice was sharp, body quickly moving to walk up to him, making sure to not disturb her crushe’s nap.
“Can you and Y/N go for the food? Honestly I am bored, Damiano said he’s not coming and Ethan is too preoccupied right now.” He pouted and everything, giving the older girl the softest look he could possibly manage, while pointing at Ethan having a phone call.
“Couldn’t you have thought of that before? Seriously, Thomas, right now? They are sleeping.”
“Oh, come on Vic, please! I’ll owe you!”
“Agh, agh, fine, let me wake them,” she paused,”you’re lucky I’m hungry or I would let all of you starve,” she mumbled, annoyed by the boys’ laziness, before going over to the sleeping figure on the towel.
“Hey, amore… come on, sweets, wake up. Hey. Hey,” she repeated softly, a sweet smile on her face as their eyes opened slowly.
“Vic? Oh, are the guys going for the food?”
“Not quite. The guys are being annoying and refuse to go. So, if you want to eat we have to go.”
“Oh, alright then. Give me a moment to wake up,” they said and Victoria smoothed down their sea-salt stained t-shirt.
“Ethan, where are the keys?”
“On the engine, cucciola.”
“Ok, grazie.”
With that the two clueless friends sat in the car, Victoria realizing the keys were missing a little too late.
“Agh, cazzo, Ethan! They are not her- The door isn’t opening. Why is the door not opening?”
“Mine isn’t either.”
“Ethan!” Her voice could be heard crystal clear, even with the windows separating her from the outside.
“What is it, Victoria?” He asked, a smug smile on his face as he stood outside the car window.
“What did you do?”
“Well,” spoke Damiano, “you two clueless, little shits have gotten annoying. So if you are not going to do it, we will.” He stated and Victoria’s eyes almost went out of her head, catching onto what her friend was saying.
“Y/N, Victoria has feelings for you. Victoria, Y/N has feelings for you. Now talk!”
If only glare’s could kill, Ethan would be having a very painful death as Vic kept mumbling how she’ll kill him. Y/N, on the other hand, simply stared at Victoria in adoration.
“Do you have feelings for me?”
“Look Y/N, I-”
“Answer my question Victoria! Do you have feelings for me?”
“Yes,” she replied, looking down as if she was ashamed.
“That’s not how I wanted you to find out. I wasn’t really planning on telling you cause I know that Ethan is lying but-”
“Victoria! Take a breath between sentences! What are you talking about? Ethan is not lying, you know?”
“I know, Y/N, you don’t have to sugarco- Wait, what?”
“He isn’t lying, Victoria. I really like you.” “You do?”
“Mhm, I do. Now, will you give me a kiss or are you waiting for Ethan to smash our heads together,” they joked, easing up the tension Victoria was feeling and pushing their lips to hers.
It was not anything special, just a simple, soft, kiss. What made it special was that it was to each other. They shared a kiss together, not someone else, not a stranger, not someone they had no feelings for, but someone they were yearning for, for a very long time now.
tag list: @bieberhoodforever@tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina
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goji-pilled · 2 years ago
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Well here goes episode 9 👍
-The fact that this episode opens by showing the end of the trainstation scene again already makes me want to break down
-Oktavia!!!!!!! Fishy!!!!
-One of the things I love about the sheer horror of Oktavia is the fact that she screams, and it's still in Sayaka's voice and you can hear that horrible mix of despair and all kinds of emotion.... god.
-Kyoko's refusal of abandoning the body. Man.
-Connect still slaps by the way
-That pure... detachment in Homura's voice is so fucking sad man. Because like she cares, she does care so very much, and Rebellion proves that but she lost all of them so much and oughhhghg *head in hands* Homura....
-Stan Kyoko 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
-Kyubey. (derogatory)
-I need him dead so badly, I need his entire species to pop at once like a bunch of balloons
-*points* the chairs!!!
-Kyubey calls girls "females" and that alone is the only red flag you need to know he's bad news
-God the fucking nerve of him to say "If you feel like dying for the universe call me :3" like how about you choke on a dick you piece of garbage
-Kyoko making sure the body's in prime condition,,,, so much for using her power only for herself,,,, FUCK.
-Wait are those the horse and mermaid windchimes they've mentioned on the wiki once- Okay. OKAY.
-Sayaka is the one who reminded her of why she became a magical girl,,,her hope,,,her reason to fight,,,, don't look at me I'm soft
-I'm in fucking tears and this was just Madoka and Kyoko talking ffffffffuck
-"Aren't you friends?"
"Not really"
*head in hands*
-The little kissy face by the entrance is genuinely so cute though fkdkfjsl
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-Damn Kyoko what happened to only caring about yourself? First Sayaka and now Madoka?
-Anyways god. The hallway with the posters and the "Look at me"... that and the entrance really add emphasis on Sayaka's yearning for someone to love her and pay attention to her, even if it's a curse now...
-SYMPOSIUM MAGARUM MY BELOVED HEHEHE
-It's hard to see anything in that memory-hallway but one of those seems to be Madoka, Hitomi and Sayaka on their way to school while other is Kyoko with the bag of apples... facsinating
-Wait I never noticed how the memories stop being shown when Oktavia realizes they're there. Kinda feels like a strange kind of closing off one's heart... which would fit considering the pain of past rejection and memories make sure she can never move on and get what she longs for the most... or maybe that's me
-I LOVE THIS FUCKING THING. THE TAVI.
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-I'm still in love with the fact that Symposium Magarum doesn't just perfectly capture Oktavia's despair and suffering, but also Madoka and Kyoko's desperation to try and get Sayaka back.
-It's how Kyoko says, payback. Someone who's hurt and now lashes out everyone and everything, hellbent to spread her curse.... man. MANNNNNN.
-That fucking sihoulette moment that turns into a heart is fucking evil
-There it is... Kyosuke who lost his hand, Sayaka who wondered why it wasn't hers, and now Oktavia who's lost hers.. goddamnit.
-On a different note: Remember how the Anthonies referred to Gertrud as the queen of the labyrinth? The fact that Oktavia bleeds blue blood kinda fits in with "Witches are seen as queens of their little kindoms" thing lol
-The happy dream thing is just, god, so much. Because like she calls being by Sayaka's side and fighting with her a dream in Rebellion and that shit fucking broke me the first time (still does)
-Fucking Violin boy.
-There's something so... so ough idk what to call it but the "You gotta focus on the one thing that means the most to you and protect it to the end" line is just. A lot. And it also makes me so horribly emotional about Ophelia again because in that outcome Kyoko failed to do that again and breaks under that, abandoned by everyone and everything she loves and I'm normal I swear I am-
-That promise to never abandon Sayaka... even as a witch, even when she's a monster so angry and hurt Kyoko chooses to stay with her because she believes Sayaka still is worthy of love, attention, care and kindness and it's all Sayaka wanted from all this and if that isn't love then I don't know what is.
-Die Kyubey.
-And they're home... their party for broken hearts....
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creativeashproductions · 4 years ago
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A Distant Dream II // Luke Patterson
Summary: In 1994 seventeen year old Luke Patterson had once again tried to ask out the girl that held his heart. With the belief he would see the younger Mercer girl the next morning he decides wait to confess his feelings. Only to have soft music bewitched the reader into an antique wardrobe with lots of history.
Warnings: Swearing, talk of pregnancy, cops, strict parents, and angst 
Words: 3.1k
A/N: I’m thinking maybe four or five more parts following this. I really fell back into a Narnia hole recently.
Part One
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Masterlist
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Julie Molina didn't mean to snoop in Luke's things at all, but her elbow had bumped his backpack to the ground. A worn picture had escaped the open bag to float next to her foot. Her deft fingers picked the photo of Alex standing with a girl laughing at something out of frame. The jacket the girl wore was familiar to Julie as she had seen Luke wear it.
Her throws furrowed as she turned the picture to the back to see the writing on the back in legible black sharpie.
Y/N and Alex Mercer, Downtown Los Angeles 1993
Julie's took a guess that the girl was-
"What the hell Julie?" Luke's furious tone took the girl by surprise, but it was the rush to yank the picture from her hand. The guitarist flooded with the familiar grief that was never too far from his mind, it had been one a year to him instead of twenty-six.
The picture was cradled in the guitarist's hands as he pinned a nasty glare on his living friend as if she had kicked his puppy. Behind him stood Alex and Reggie becoming quiet at the picture in Luke's hand. The tears started to fill Alex's eyes as he vividly remembered the night when the picture had been taken.
Alex slung his arm around his sister's shoulders with the identical grin on display as Bobby and Reggie slumped over a paper. You had a feeling it was a song that Reggie had written and Bobby loved being able to give his input on the music. Something he didn't get to do with Luke. With that name in mind, you turned to the guitarist lazing around on a couch.
The band had finished a three-song set for a local club that often turned their cheek to minors walking in. It had taken a lot of manoeuvring, but you had been able to sneak inside to add the band to the list.
"Can you believe this?" Alex gleefully laughed, looking around the packed backstage room they had snagged. They had it for another five minutes, and the band ate it up as if they had already made it in the business.
"I can't believe you guys actually made this happen." You breathed before a laugh escaped your mouth at Reggie, pulling a face at you. The blinding flash bringing your attention to the boy holding the camera you had received as a gift.
"Always a great candid with you!" Luke announced shoving the camera in his backpack with a cheeky grin aimed directly at you, "We better split before security catches us."
"I thought they knew we were here!" Alex exclaimed rushing to grab his things with all bad ideas conjuring in his head. Being in the band annoyed your parents so if he ended up arrested he'd be shipped off to a behavioural boarding school.
He saw himself in a prison cell after being arrested. His mind going to the worst-case scenario instead of only being kicked out instead.
"If you knew the truth, you wouldn't have been able to sit still." Luke retorted as the sound of footsteps sounded outside the room. Luke's eyes scanning the room for any kind of solution to their problem.
 With no safe exit, the five teenagers shuffled into the small bathroom with a big window that opened. Luke was quick to push Bobby and Reggie out first. He went next stationing himself to catch you before Alex was pacing in the bathroom alone.
"C'mon man!" Luke whispered to the blonde drummer glancing between the open window and the door separating him from security.
"If our parents have to pick us up from the cops, we are dead, Luke!" Alex hissed wincing at the loud knock on the door, "They barely condone being a band let alone getting arrested. We'd be in boarding school before you could say Orpheum!"
"Then get your ass down here!" Luke retorted jumping in place as Alex debated his options, but he slipped out the window with a sigh. The group running off with the sound of security hanging out the window screaming at the teenagers. His hand encased in Y/N Mercer's own soft hand.
"That's Y/N." Alex's voice was soft to the Puerto Rican's ears with his eyes a more delicate blue giving Julie the impression he was mostly lost in thought, "My little sister."
Julie's eyes shifted between the three ghostly boys all quieter than anything Julie had ever encountered with them. The only other time Julie had seen Luke so sad was when Alex and Reggie brought her to Luke's childhood home. It was unsettling to see the usual happy go lucky boy drained of energy.
"Did you find her?" Julie asked recalling that Alex had been the only one so far to not attempt to find his family. Reggie had told Julie how his house turned into a bike shack but other than that the subject wasn't brought up.
"She disappeared in 1994." Luke choked out, clenching his eyes tight at the last smile he saw on your face. The one that was seared in his mind with the regret of never taking his chance with you.
Twenty-six years didn't wipe the deep feelings he still held for the girl who had disappeared with his heart. Attempts to find her futile leaving her state just as unknown as back in the '90s. The case had been long cold with the years erasing her memory from people as they moved on.
"Did she-"
"We don't know. One night she just disappeared with no clues." Reggie supplied finding himself to be the only one able to speak. Luke and Alex overtook by the flood of grief and guilt that came every time they grew strong enough to mention her name.
"I can look for her if you want." Julie offered to the trio, "If she's living she may have social media. More likely Facebook with her age but if I can get-"
"No." Luke and Alex spoke at the same time with equal passion in their voices, but it was Luke that continued, "I don't want to know."
Julie's lips parted, but Luke already left with Alex in tow by the grasp on his distressed jean jacket. The Mercer boy sending a smile of gratitude, leaving Reggie alone with her.
"I'd like to know." Reggie softly spoke, meeting the gaze of the living girl, "Maybe that's why we're here too. To find the truth about her disappearance and if we find something, we can tell them."
The shadowed pain in his eyes creating a yearning in Julie's heart, "Of course. Can you tell me about her? I could build a portfolio on possible places she's been."
"Her disappearance was a catalyst for a lot of things that happened." Reggie admitted breaking his usual carefree and clueless demeanour, "Alex and Y/N aren't twins. She was a year younger than us but where one sibling went, so did the other. They understood each other more than the band could ever know."
"Why hasn't Alex talked about her?"
"It's hard. The world in the '90s is very different from this time. We've mentioned bits and pieces of our lives, but you don't know the darker pieces."
Julie listened intently as Reggie was the most serious she had ever seen him, showing her that there was more to Reggie Peters than he let on. Julie felt honoured he trusted her enough to drop his guard that he held up strong.
"Mr. and Mrs. Mercer had certain beliefs that their family should hold and show the rest of the world. Before the band, Alex and Y/N were shells of their real selves laced into designer clothing, perfect grades, charity galas and their futures already written."
"So, they came from money? Galas and designer clothing." Julie rolled her eyes, "What was so bad about that?"
"Just because they had money didn't mean they weren't suffering. Anything less than 98% was a failure to Mr. Mercer. By the time Y/N was thirteen, she was trained on how to be a perfect lady. Alex wasn't supposed to play the drums, both he and Y/N were classically trained on piano and violin." Reggie recalled, "The first time Alex held drumsticks it was like he shattered the glass window of the tank he was drowning in."
"What about Y/N?" Julie questioned, wrapping her arms around her knees as she watched Reggie melted into the memories he fondly held dear in his heart.
"She stayed in her tank drowning, so Alex didn't have to be alone." Reggie simply replied a fond smile reappearing at the days you would dedicate to solely to him.
Reggie didn't like to talk about the things that went on behind the doors of his idyllic beach house. You just knew and gave him days that let him step out of the fear of the unknown. He didn't have to put up his front like he did with the guys, he got to be unapologetically Reginald Peters. The boy that had wished his parents would stop fighting and be that happy family once more, but his wishes never got answered.
"She sounds like a really cool person."
"Luke and she had this unspoken relationship that never evolved into more. Both too scared the other didn't feel the same. The night she disappeared, he was going to tell her he loved her. When it didn't happen, he was going to do it the next morning."
 "But she was never found. What do you think happened?" Julie questioned the Peters boy who's smile dropped. His mind flipping through all the what-ifs that had lived in his brain for the entire year before he died.
"I think she ran into trouble and couldn't find a way out. I only hope if she passed away, it was easy and quick." Reggie finished instantly flipping the switch back to his usual oblivious façade used as his coping mechanism.
"I was thinking we could work on that song?" Luke piped up as he and Alex both poofed back into the studio as if the last hour hadn't happened. Both their pain neatly placed back in that box in their brains the light barely caught a glance at.
As Sunset Curve poured themselves into the song, they worked on together deep in the basement of the Molina's a sound lightly filled the space. The sound of a celebration heard with the backing of upbeat trumpets followed by a laugh. A soft golden glow lighting up the dark basement through a sheet protecting an antique piece of furniture.
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The Golden Age, Cair Paravel, Narnia
The House of Pevensie ruled fairly and justly for a decade and a half together with High King Peter and his Queen, you, by his side. Never one to cower from a battle you were often found by Peter's side holding the sword and the bow strapped over your back. Both items gifts from Father Christmas back during the Winter Rebellion against the White Witch.
Unfortunately, all good things come to an end. In the year 1015 of the Golden Age, the Kings and Queens of Narnia set out on a hunt. Leaving the daily duties to their court, the Pevensie family decided to hunt the magical White Stag. It was a break from the stress of ruling and failing to provide an heir to the kingdom for you and Peter.
"How are you?" Susan questioned slowly to a trot beside you and your horse Mercer. The question flaring frustration once more in your body.
"I am fine, Susan." You sighed looking ahead to where Peter was speaking with Edmund and Lucy animatedly. His blue eyes raising to meet yours with the fondness that had evolved from the love.
The courtship that turned into marriage had mellowed from the way it had been in your early '20s. At thirty-one, you found that what you had thought was everlasting love was simply just two teenagers with mutual attraction. The only two that understood each other coming from a different place than Narnia.
You still loved Peter, but something made you feel as if he wasn't the first man you had loved and certainly not as much as this nameless person. Overtime Peter and you came to the same conclusion, you ruled as before. You loved each other but not as fiercely as before with the kingdom's responsibilities, placing the relationship on the back burner.
You had years to fix it, however. That's the excuse you always told herself when the guilt of thinking of another.
"The last person to the White Stag has to sit through O'Rielly's draft of his speech," Edmund called out before racing off with his trusted horse Philip taking the lead. Only momentarily as Peter first overtook him.
Mercer swiftly brought you up right behind Peter with a grin on both of your faces.
"Ed, as usual, makes his declaration and can't keep up!" You called over your shoulder at the twenty-eight-year-old King.
His response is a teasing eye roll as he leaned over to caress Philip, "Are you all right, Philip?"
"I'm not as young as I once was." The dashing dark brown horse huffed to his rider as he shifts on his hooves returning to his confident stance—the other royal horses returning to Edmund's side as well. Mercer immediately stepping up on Philip's left flank with a soft sound of acknowledgement.
"Come on, Ed," Susan spoke barely giving Philip a look as she had known for a while that it may be time for Philip to retire. For Philip to choose his successor to serve his King, but it was hard for Edmund to think of Philip retiring.
"Just catching my breath," Edmund informed his cheery older sister patting Philip once more before sitting up straight in the saddle. His brown eyes scanning the surroundings hugging the family in warmth reminiscent of his mother's arms.
"That'll be all we'll catch at this rate." Susan retorted copying Edmund by patting her horse's head earning a thankful neigh in response. The teasing grin lighting up Susan's pretty features that had many a suitor at the castle for her hand in marriage.
"What did he say again, Susan?" Lucy inquired with rosy cheeks from the autumn wind hitting from the exhilaration of riding. Coming to a stop beside the youngest royal, your hand found a home in Peter's calloused one.
"I believe he underestimated us as usual." You inserted sharing a smile with both your sisters-in-laws, "I can't quite recall the words…Susan, would you recall them?"
"' you girls wait in the castle. I'll get the stag myself' were his words with his cheeky smile." Susan replied. Unlike when Edmund was thirteen, he joyfully joined in the laughter filling the woods of Narnia.
Your eyes scanning the area that tickled a faint memory of a girl wearing unusual clothing in the kingdom. A shirt that bared your skin in the dead of winter. The shirt paired with a short skirt of a similar colour to another young woman. Your attention brought Peter's to the landscape as well. So curious the High King dismounted his horse and helped you down. 
 "What's this?" Peter inquired stepping closer to a tall pole with a lamp lit up with a flame. Covered in vines it was nearly invisible to the eye unless you looked up, "It seems familiar. Love, do you know what it is?"
"I don't remember it. I've seen it but how I did evades me." You replied, stepping closer to the lamppost. Susan was quick to step up beside you just as confused.
"As if from a dream?" Susan spoke, earning a mute nod from you as that same faceless man flickered in your memory. The one that haunted your dreams with the odd cameo of a blonde man.
Your eyes returning the horse you named Mercer as the name held an emotional connection you never understood. Often you would have a memory tickle your brain before disappearing with tasks to be done at the castle. When you saw the back of a blonde in crowds, you felt sad and lost. Or feeling Peter's hand in your own fluttering your heart until your e/c eyes found his bright blue and the fluttering died down.
"Of a dream of a dream," Lucy spoke, turning on her heel to the vast trees concealing the beyond. Lucy spoke barely louder than a whisper, "Spare Oom."
With that, the youngest Queen raced off through the woods with her family on her heels. 
"Lucy!" Peter admonished the retreating form of his little sister in her blood-red dress. A deep sigh pulled from your lips as the free-spirited woman ignored their calls.
"Every time. I swear she's still a kid at heart." You spoke jogging alongside Edmund behind Susan and Peter. Your midnight blue dress barely touching the grass of the forest floor.
"You're a kid at heart as well." Edmund merely replied, keeping his eyes on the bright colours of the royal garb his siblings wore.
"Come on!" Lucy's voice called out through the branches that slowly but surely turned softer and the trees tapered smaller.
"These aren't branches!" Peter called out in his deep voice that temporally turned higher before it went back to the gravelly tone. You swore with everything inside his hands became softer and harder to grasp.
"Keen observation there." You retorted taken aback at the attitude you found infused in your voice as if you a teenager once more. Peter's surprise quickly found in his blue eyes that glanced over his shoulder.
"Ow! Ooh!" Edmund hissed as a branch scraped his cheeks and the pain vanished with the soft touch of fur on the scratch. The sudden change of texture startled him almost as the switch of his voice to the high pitch of his thirteen-year-old self.
"They're coats! Fur coats!" Susan gasped startled by the odd shift between the forest and whatever this place was. 
"Mrs. Beaver would throw a fit over th- Ow! Lucy, you elbowed my ribs!" You whined stumbling into Peter's side as the others complained at each other hitting, stepping and kicking as the area became smaller and smaller.
Your eyes raising to meet Peter's blue taken aback by his appearance back when you had fought side by side against the White Witch. The eyes that kept rapt with yours at the coronation fifteen years ago and then your wedding ten years previous. 
Then behind the siblings in front of you, a door opened to a large empty room with windows behind framing a rural countryside. Then your husband and in-laws were gone, and you fell out with memories from a lost life hitting you full force as you tripped out of the wardrobe. 
Tag List (PLEASE SEND AN INBOX TO BE ADDED! I CANNOT GUARANTEE YOU WILL BE ON THE LIST VIA POST COMMENTS!)
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lys-lilac · 4 years ago
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Yuki Sohma: An In-depth Character Analysis
I remember getting this anime as a recommendation in summer almost 2 years ago. Right, when the reboot season 1 started. I was so engrossed in this that I can’t tell you. The theme of the series always made me keep at the edge of my seat. And yeah, as the title suggests, I got to admire him the most-
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I know, many of you might think that I fell in love with his beauty after seeing him in the anime for the first time, but unfortunately, it’s a big no. I love the characters who care about others so much. And he is the perfect example.
Now, the point is, what makes him steal the top rank for me while most of the fandom is basically about Kyo and Tohru? Let me put down the points. But before that, grab your earphones or headphones, and play this song as you read about the things he has been through.
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1. His selfless attitude
His kind nature shines throughout the series. We see in the beginning that it was he who discovers Tohru living in a tent. He welcomes her to stay in Shigure’s home, even after knowing that their curse is being put at risk and takes care of her fever. After she sleeps, he ventures out in the night to dig up her belongings. Even though he mentions that he had selfishly taken her just to rebel against the family curse, still this is replaced by his benevolent and sweet nature towards Tohru. As a result, their relationship is beautiful.
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He also has helped her countless times, whether it’s taking her back from her relatives, or lending her hand to carry the grocery bags. These all moments define how pure their bond is and how both trust and care each other.
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2. His willingness to sacrifice everything 
This point actually reminds of Kasumi Toshiki from Romance MD: Always on Call. Even though he appears plain on the surface, he can go to any extent just for the sake of her happiness. One instance of this can be from season 2 episode 22. Kyo and Tohru seem to be in the hallway, with Tohru trying to grab the script from his hands. Just then, Yuki says whether they would give him way to go upstairs. It is obvious that Yuki would have seen the whole thing, but for her sake, he doesn’t interrupt. The line he says here is-
“You are precious. I look up to you. I cherish you because you provided for me what I desperately longed for.” 
Now what did he yearn for? It was Tohru’s love and affection for him, which he didn’t get from anyone else, not even his mother when he was a child.
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3. The heart-fluttering sweet moments and his character development
Ah! Thanks to the production for such sweet moments of Yuki and Tohru. Even if the ship is not canon, they will still remain my favorite.
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In my opinion, this story actually portrays Yuki’s development in character more than any other thing. This is amazing. The boy, who was unable to let go of his dark past, the truth that he was after was covered with a lid, all are slowly untangled with Tohru’s compassionate nature towards Yuki. Unlike the fan club who adored him only for his looks, she sees him in a different, more friendly light, which mellows him up. What’s more, the once timid boy builds up so much courage within himself that he doesn’t get afraid of Akito anymore and confronts her face to face. The warmth he searched for, finally reaches him just like a soft feather, landing on his palm, giving a soft and soothing touch of happiness. 
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Let’s look at this background here. Yuki is surrounded by chinese bellflowers, which symbolize honesty, unchanging love and obedience. In his hand lays a white rose, which means, devotion, and innocence. The color white itself and his name are a symbol of peace and silence. This actually is an imagery for his character, and it resembles it truly.
Yuki had no intentions of getting on bad terms with Kyo. But it’s seen in episode 20, that Kyo shouts at him outside the banquet saying it was all his fault. Although he was small, but those words were like a heavy blow to him. What’s more, even when he comes back crying hoping for his mom to console him, she slaps him and warns him not to disappear again. (Noo... T^T)
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(Kyo shouts this to him outside the hall.)
There is some fault with Kyo as well for this point. All Yuki wanted was to become friends with him. He yearned for the parental love and friendship which Kyo had since his childhood. But, the latter has the misunderstanding that Yuki had everything.
Yuki says this when he remembers that Kyo didn’t take the hat from his hand when he gives him. This makes him cry so hard, cause he was just a little child going through these painful things, all at once.
“There was something I wanted. Parents who would embrace me. A home I wanted to return to.” 
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(Yuki cries after being ignored by Kyo.)
Even though Kyo’s behavior initially compelled him to be like that, even though he knew that there is a lot Kyo was internally suffering from, but in episode 22, he just couldn’t take it anymore. Instead of debating, he stays silent and shows his most vulnerable and hurt face to Kyo, because he didn’t want things to end up like that between them. He didn’t want the person he admired to lash out at him every time, when he was at no fault at all, and still is the prey of Kyo’s anger and apathy. This only leaves Kyo speechless, making him break the window out of frustration. This part pains me a lot, because Kyo had at least someone he can throw out his anger and put the blame. But Yuki didn’t even had that.
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There is again this pretty imagery here. Yuki, when looking at Kyo, is bathed with the sunlight. This symbolizes the change he has gone through and accepted it, which is really stunning to notice. 
[The rest are in paragraph form from here]
Now that I have talked much about his positive points, let’s explore a hot topic which is often a reason of disagreement between Yuki’s fans and Kyo’s fans.
What are Yuki’s actual feelings towards Tohru? 
I know that almost all the fandom here will say these feelings which he talks about is what a mother would give to his child. And this point strengthens a lot more as it was confirmed by the author. If that’s the case, then let me state my thoughts on this, which are opposite to the author’s.
Let’s again move back to episode 22 of season 2. In the first half, Yuki talks to  Kakeru about his first meet with Tohru when he was a child. At that time, he was tortured so much by Akito, both physically and mentally, that he thinks that there is no purpose of his life, and he is not needed by anyone at all. With this thought in mind, he disguises himself with a baseball hat and runs away from the Sohma estate. After some time, he discovers Tohru’s mother, Kyoko, crying because she was missing. He suddenly remembers to have seen her earlier, crying in the street, and helps her to reach her mother. At last, he places the hat on her head and disappears. It is later seen that he has converted to his rat form, and cries on realizing that at least at that point, he was needed by Tohru, and his thoughts were proved wrong. 
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He mentions that he almost forgot to ask her name at that time. And when he again was hitting the bottom, Tohru approaches him in the high school, slowly building courage and giving love to him. He also discovers later that the girl, whom he once his hat was none other than Tohru. With things unravelling, their bond becomes stronger. 
But, although he mentions that he had only motherly affection towards her and couldn’t see her in a romantic light, I still doubt the line itself.
“But she appeared before the hopeless me once again. To be with me, close to me. She even listened to what someone like me had to say. Time after time, she accepted me time and again. She’s beloved to me. Like how the sky feels so close, yet so far.”
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This line, although somehow shows that Yuki is saved by Tohru every time he is in need of it, but it feels weird to say that he only thinks of her as a mother here. I mean, one can also feel like this if he/she is helped by a good friend, or a dear one. And Yuki also mentions that she is beloved to him. But, what about the last line? Doesn’t it sound like, he can’t reach her even if she was close to reach? Because this is the exact meaning. If we analyze word by word, then this makes sense, as Yuki had already realized by that time that Kyo and Tohru had mutual feelings towards each other. In fact, he says it himself that it dawned on him in the last episode of season 1 when Tohru chases after Kyo into the forest, the latter being converted to his monster form. And how could he not? This guy is mature enough to figure out anything. Then this would have been nothing.
One instance of this realization could be the beach arc episode 7 , where he says-
“I probably actually knew, in the back of my mind. What would happen if I opened the lid. What I must do. Thanks for always being willing to lend an ear. Thanks for always accepting my weaknesses.... You probably don’t know that you are the one who’s always saving me. You always shared your kindness, warmth, and joy with me. That’s why, I won’t lose. I will keep going forward, and keep believing.”
Tohru asks the exact thing which was going on my mind listening to that voice acting. Why did he look so sad there? And Yuki replies that she is just like the sky, very dear to him. Doesn’t it sound exactly like a confession to a person about what she did for you till now? Yuki already had realized that, and this is just a proof. He sounds sad, and he also compares her to the sky. The metaphor which comes to mind is that he is basically symbolizing that her vast expanse of kindness is just like the sky, which is so close, yet so far. Even if he wanted, he can’t keep her all to himself. That’s why he just says that she is dear to him. The way it is portrayed here, is just like saying goodbye before parting ways. Huh... I didn’t continue the season afterwards because of this scene. T~T
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(Why, why did he cry after saying that she was dear to him....? Isn’t it right in front of your eyes? *sobs*)
And, if he only sees her as a mother, then what does this mean-
“I was so confused, not to mention incredibly embarrassed. I wasn’t sure how to deal with it, so I didn’t. I shut it away immediately. I stuffed those feelings down, teased and flirted like a normal guy with the girl he likes. But still, it felt wrong.”
It’s clear here. He had somehow developed romantic feelings for her, earlier. But when he realized it was not what he meant, and saw the gradual progression of Tohru and Kyo liking each other, he changes his mind, thinking that he might have been wrong the whole time. That the feelings he harbored for her weren’t correct. But when he thinks of her as a mother, he feels embarrassed. And it’s no different. Why wouldn’t anyone feel like that if it’s someone of your age? This implies that their relationship wasn’t a romantic one, but not a motherly one either.
Kakeru asks the same thing next. He says that maybe he has twisted his thoughts and feelings just after knowing that he had lost her to Kyo. But Yuki denies it saying-
“It’s not true why I feel like this. But, he properly sees her as a woman. He loves her. You can see it in his eyes. Her too. The way she looks at him... But I... I don’t want that! That isn’t what I want! I’d feel... so lonely. I am not willing to give up. I don’t know when to give up.”
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(Such a pure boy... Just cried after saying that... )
Definitely as said above. He is obviously jealous of Kyo here. Not in a romantic way, but because he didn’t want Tohru’s kindness and hope she gave him to recede away. Even if it was like a good friend, he wanted to stay by her side. He is mature enough to see the bonds that she and he shared. And he is not the type to fret over getting rejected or anything like that. Moreover, you can already get a hint from the line that he approved of Kyo and Tohru. This always impresses me. The bond that these two have is so beautiful and unspoken, that it transcends romance itself. 
Although this is probably half of my reasonings, I will stop here. Although I covered the most important ones here, but I wanted to discuss many other scenes too. Let’s keep it for next time!
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thatasianstereotype · 4 years ago
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Damn, You’re Looking Fine.
To my utter delight, my crack writing Fuck. I’m Gay. got a good reception. I was not expecting to write more for this AU/pairing. But why not? I got some ideas and a computer to write them down on.
So this fic is the took-a-while-to-put-together sequel. It’s focused on the downfall of one certain Liar-la, Damian wooing Adrien with all the flair and romantics as his Chaton deserves, and Adrien being a blushing hot gay mess. 
P.S. Damian’s formal way of talking is an utter pain to write but hilarious to read.
P.S.S. Creative liberties were taken. Again. I just feel this needs to be mentioned. 
.
.
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So Status Update:
Adrien and Damian are definitely dating (It is totally official. Told you ya boi got game).
Adrien still calls him Hot-And-Sexy from time to time much to his utter mortification (He can’t make himself stop. Please send help). And Dami gets amused by it every single time, that arrogant smug jerk.
Marinette still puts the fear of god in Damian and he is wary of her. She feels very proud about that. Adrien wants to facepalm.
Fuck Gabriel Agreste.  
And Lila Rossi is still a bitch.  
Adrien and Marinette were made aware about Damian’s alter ego —well mostly because he is utterly terrified of Marinette’s seemingly sweet (icy) smile she gave him when she politely asked how he obtained the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculous and partly because of Adrien’s pouting kitten eyes. 
They truly were a pair to reckon with. 
.
“I am not sure why the Justice League dismissed your concerns and pleas for assistance. So I am taking the initiative. My name is Damian Wayne, the son of Batman and the current Robin and leader of the Teen Titans.”
He’s a superhero too?! And it’s Robin!!! One of his favorites!! Can you hear him internally squealing in excitement?
Adrien bit his lip to keep from fanboying right then and there. But a slight pink hue spread across his face. 
“You’re not lying.” Mari has gotten pretty good at deciphering through people’s bullshit. Whether it’s because she is now a Guardian or because Lila’s bitchiness made her a human lie-detector remains unknown.
Damian took it in stride. “I am not.”
“Paris is still our city.”
“I am only offering my assistance.” He won’t barge in on their superhero duties to the city. He has more class than that.
Mari didn’t have to look at Adrien to know his decision.
She smiled, a bright genuine smile. “Then we’re allies.” Before her eyes gained a spark of mischief and her smile turned teasing. “Hot-And-Sexy.” 
“Marinette!” Adrien immediately covered his blushing bright red face with both hands, utterly mortified. 
His sister was evil. E. V. I. L. And why is Damian smirking and looking so smug? Fuck! He even makes that look completely hot. Curse his Adonis genes. And curse his teenage hormones. 
He regrets introducing the two of them together. What a pair they make. Truly a couple of fur-midable terrors here. 
.
Back to the matter at hand, Marinette is able to ensure that Hawk Moth and Mayura will never be out again and another akuma won’t be made. She already made sure that the miraculous were better protected. 
Damian has enough evidence to put them behind bars for their crimes but Marinette wanted to go through it and make sure that Adrien won’t suffer the repercussions of having a villain for a dad so they held onto it until they figure out how best to protect their sunshine. 
.
Ah Shit. 
“Duusu? Where are you?” 
Did Gabriel lose the miraculous again? 
But when he looked into the last place he left it, he groaned. Fuck. His brooch was a fake again.
He knew he shouldn’t have made a miraculous fashion line and had replicas of the miraculous jewelries made. It was his most popular items to date. He has gotten lot of praises for getting the details just right and capturing the essence of each miraculous holder. No surprise there. He deals with them on a daily basis. He should get the details fucking right. 
It’s a wonder he only came up with a line because there was talk that he was becoming obsolete with no new ideas coming forth and if there is one thing that Gabriel Agreste isn’t, it is being obsolete. 
The line was just a joke, a parody of the heroes and villains if you will, but apparently people like it. Ladybug and Chat Noir were the most popular obviously (he should’ve seen that coming to be honest). Hardly anyone buys Hawk Moth or Mayura and he is left with boxes of fake brooches. 
It is annoying.
Especially since he keeps fucking misplacing his miraculous. 
.
Adrien felt like he could be a Disney princess and just skip his way to school and sing for the world to hear. 
Now that the Butterfly miraculous were safely with Marinette, he doesn’t have to worry about another akuma. He could just die happy right now. His dad doesn’t have a hold over him anymore. He doesn’t have to put up with Liar-la anymore. But if they put up a fuss? Well, worst case scenario is he becomes a Dupain-Cheng. 
And he doesn’t mind. He’s already an honorary one. 
And if that somehow doesn’t work out (which he highly doubts), Damian offered to make him a Wayne. 
.
Françoise Dupont High School experienced a shock that morning. Specifically Ms. Bustier’s class. 
When they saw Adrien and Marinette walking in class with arms intertwined, laughing and smiling together. 
What the actual fuck?
Did they cross into an alternate universe? Marinette is a nasty bully and Adrien’s a pure sunshine child. Why would they be acting like they were the best of friends? 
Lila glowered darkly when she saw them walking towards the back and sitting at the same table. Didn’t Adrien care about what his father thinks? Doesn’t he want to still be able to go to school? 
She bit her lip and turned on the waterworks, her eyes close to bursting into tears. She made herself be the very picture of a pitiful woe-is-me victim as she cried out in a hurtful and betrayed tone. “Adrien, what are you doing with her? I thought we were close friends.” 
The sheep class instantly catered to Lila, pointing their fingers at the pair. 
Alya, her biggest supporter, led the charge as always. “Adrien! What do you have to say for yourself? How could you cheat on Lila like this? And with her?” 
Adrien narrowed his eyes at his former friend. Bitch, how dare she implies he was in an actual relationship and had feelings for that harlot. 
Wow. 
He has been spending way too much time around Damian. 
"Yeah, bro!” Kim said, raising his voice. “How could you do her dirty?” 
“Okay guys.” Adrien cut in. “I don’t know where you heard that but me and Lila are not dating. Like at all.” 
“Please.”Alya waved him off like he didn’t know what he was talking about (he was highly offended at the notion he didn’t know what his heart yearns for). “We all know you have feelings for Lila. You’re just in denial over them.”
Bitch, what?
Is no one catching onto his chaotic gay vibes here?  
And oh, how his fragile little heart was betrayed yet again when he saw Nino supporting his girlfriend. He still couldn’t believe the first friend he made all by himself was a part of their rabid pack. He deeply mourned the loss of such a great friend in the midst of that deceiving fox’s claws. 
“How many times do I need to say it?” At this point, Adrien was about to throw hands. “I don’t like Lila like that. I feel nothing but pure spite for her. Also, me and Marinette are not dating if anyone’s wondering. We’re just really good friends.”
“But Marinette’s a big bully.” Alix piped up, a hard edge in her voice. “She treats Lila horribly.”
“Marinette didn’t do anything to her. Rossi is lying.” 
“Oh Adrien.” It was Mylene of all people who spoke up. “Did Marinette get to you with her lies?” 
He was done. 
Completely and utterly done. 
He looked over at Marinette who shared his exasperation at the class’ antics. 
Adrien already said it before. But it bears repeating.
Lila Rossi is a bitch.
Luckily (or maybe unluckily), that was the moment Ms. Bustier chose to step in the room and class started. 
When the teacher’s back was turned, Adrien pulled out his phone and proceeded to spend the rest of the time alternating between taking notes and texting with Damian. 
They were currently at the stage of their relationship to be sending animal pics and memes back and forth, with a few puns added from time to time. 
He really does have the perfect boyfriend. 
.
They cornered him after school. 
One: Rude. 
And two: Double rude. 
He was excited to meet Hot-And-Sexy (daMn iT! It’s Damian! Get it right brain) at the bakery and spending time with his two most favorite people in the world (Tom and Sabine don’t count because actual parents don’t have a ranking). 
His former friends were looking all concerned and everything because they somehow collectively came up with the idea that Marinette actually brainwashed him to believe Lila was evil. 
The fucking irony. 
They actually had the audacity to say that Marinette —sweet and honestly badass Marinette— was no good and just wanted to use Adrien to get ahead in the fashion industry (as if Mari actually needed him for that). He shouldn’t be around her. Lila was a much better person to keep as company. 
Adrien laughed in their faces and left. 
.
Onto happier events, Adrien was having a blast hanging out with Mari and Dami. His boyfriend (he still can’t believe he managed to score such a hottie!) fit right in the everything-that-matters siblings’ dynamics. 
They were in Mari’s room. Adrien was cuddling with Damian on her bed. And Mari was at her desk working on fashion designs. 
“So what’s your family like?” He played with Dami’s hair. It was so soft. Like what the fuck. It is so unfair. 
Damian thought about it for a few seconds. “My family is a bit...crazy. We drive each other insane every other day but at the end of the day, I have no doubt they have my back as I have theirs.” 
“You guys sound close.” 
“We were not always. We had an extensive amount of issues to work through before we actually bonded as a true family.” 
It was quiet for a minute until Damian casually said. “I would appreciate it a great deal if you can make time to visit Gotham for the summer.” 
Adrien stopped playing with his hair to look at him with wide incredulous eyes. “Summer’s only two months away.” 
“I am aware.” 
“You really want me to meet them? Isn’t it too early?” 
“I met yours the day we started dating.” 
True but....
Adrien averted his eyes. “Do you think your family will like me? You guys fight criminals and my dad’s a villain.” 
Damian put his hands over Adrien’s and gave them a light squeeze, making his Chaton look back at him. 
“My mother is a villain and I was raised as an assassin. Yet despite of that, my father accepted me. And I am fairly confident he will do the same to you. Mon amour, you have a pure and selfless heart. You are a better person than I am. I have no doubt that my family will love you from the start. 
“Are you being fur real right meow?” Adrien tried to lighten the atmosphere but he could feel his eyes tearing up. 
"I wouldn’t lie to mew.” 
He let out a small laugh, wiping his eyes. How did he ever get so lucky to land such an amazing guy? “You always know the purr-fect thing to say.” 
“We get it you’re in love. It’s amazing. Now stop it with the puns.” Mari rolled her eyes, utterly exasperated at these idiots who just ignored her and pulled out even more cat puns. “You have got to be kitten me.” 
Before she noticed what she said and groaned in faux despair. “Oh you two are so dead.”
Adrien stuck out his tongue playfully. “You can’t catch me. I got a handsome knight in shining armor to protect me.” 
Damian interlaced their fingers. “Always, mon amour. I’ll protect you from everything like your wicked father.”
“Does that make me the dragon here?” Mari joined in. “Cool. I can breathe fire and torch people. Too bad I can’t do that to a certain liar.” 
“Liar-la is totally the witch here.” Adrien said before thinking for a few seconds. “Does this make me the princess?” 
“Well, knights always have to save the damsel in distress.” Mari said. 
He frowned before crossing his arms indignantly. “Dami, I love you more than Plagg loves his stinky cheese, but I’m no damsel in distress.” 
Damian rolled his eyes. “Tt. Of course not. You can destroy things with a single touch. It would be not be in my best interests to downplay your abilities.”
Adrien relaxed and beamed a sunny smile. “Good. Remember that.” 
“Mon amour, I look for an equal as a partner, not some weak spoiled harlot that can not defend their self.” Damian placed a flower crown (that was just sitting on Marinette’s nightstand, must be one of her projects) on Adrien’s head. “Having said that I do believe you are a prince that deserves all the love and care in the world.” 
And oh my. 
Adrien can feel his face burning scarlet and his heart almost bursting at how sweet this incredible, conceited Adonis was. 
He was falling in love with Damian over and over again each time they meet up. 
“You deserve love too, Dami.” 
And sweet, caring Hot-And-Sexy (Ah, fuck it. He will never grow out of that) placed a soft kiss on his cheek. 
Oh dear, he didn’t know his face can burned any redder. 
He could almost hear Mari cooing in the background. 
And in case anyone was wondering, Tom and Sabine adores their everything-that-actually-matters son’s boyfriend. Damian Wayne seems like a responsible young lad. And he makes Adrien really happy which is a major plus. Anything that makes their son happy is good in their books. 
.
Lila was not at all pleased. 
Why was Adrien suddenly hanging out with Marinette? Yeah, he doesn’t buy into her lies but she was confident he will be lured into her charms. Why wouldn’t he be? She was young and way more beautiful than a baker’s daughter. He was supposed to be hers. 
She and Gabriel are going to have a talk about his rebellious son. 
Except when she arrived at the Agreste mansion, Gabriel was apparently too busy to see her. 
He was too occupied with searching through boxes of fake miraculous to find Duusu to bother with her. 
“I don’t have time for you.” 
“Excuse me?!” 
She was aghast. How dare he speak this way to his biggest supporter —well, besides Mayura and Nathalie. 
“You’re excused. Now leave the premises.”
Before the door shut in her face and she was left fuming, her face an unflattering angry red. 
.
Being Damian’s boyfriend, Adrien has come to learn that Damian does nothing by halves. Including asking him out on a date. And the actual dates themselves. 
Today as the sun fell down and night came about, Damian and Adrien were taking a stroll in the park. It was relaxing and it was nice. They talked about everything and anything. 
Adrien did not think Damian planned anything more. 
But he really shouldn’t underestimate the son of Batman. 
Because when the last of the sun’s rays were gone, Damian led him to a gazebo strung up with beautiful lights giving the whole place an ethereal feel. And with the bright moon out tonight, it looked like fairies dancing in the garden. 
He didn’t notice Damian pressed play on his phone and classical music filled the air. 
He definitely noticed Damian bowing with a flourished and holding out his hand with a charming smile. “May I have this dance, Chaton?”
Adrien would have to be a huge fool to say no. 
“I’ll loved to.” He placed his hand in Damian’s and let the Adonis lead him in a simple waltz. 
This was his life. 
His life was one big sappy romance novel. And you know what, he doesn’t care if it is. Between dealing with his shitty father and Liar-la, this kitty deserves some happiness. 
.
It was a scene from one of those Disney fairy tale movies Adrien used to watch as kid. The magic. The love. The romantics. He felt like Cinderella and wished this night will never end, that the clock will never strike midnight. He just wanted to stay in his Prince Charming’s arms forever. 
Under the starry night sky, the lovebirds danced to their heart’s content and when another song ended, Damian tilted his head down to place a tender kiss on Adrien’s lips. 
“I harbor a great deal of non-platonic affections for you, mon amour.”
“I love you too, Hot-And-Sexy.” 
.
What the fuck?!
Seriously. 
What the actual fuck? 
Lila was simply walking home after her disastrous meeting with Gabriel (She was still not over how he simply dismissed her like she was nothing. How dare he). 
When she saw them. 
Adrien and some guy (she’s pretty sure that was a guy) dancing in the park. She can feel that disgusting jealousy just burning in her veins, a cold anger thrumming underneath. 
Things were not at all going her way. 
First, Adrien is back to being friends with that Mari-whore. Then, Gabriel ignores her. Her. And now, she is seeing her Adrien in the arms of someone else. 
Oh this will just not do. 
She took out her phone from her pocket and snapped a couple of pictures, making sure Adrien can clearly be seen. She didn’t care too much about the other guy. He’s probably just another pretty airhead Adrien knew through his father. He’s not important. 
A cruel smirk appeared on her face at the thought of the perfect revenge. Adrien was going to have a rough time at school tomorrow. After all, he should’ve known better than to make a move against her. 
.
“Seriously?!”
“Wow.” 
“I’m sure there’s an explanation for this.”
“Yeah. Adrien is obviously gay. That’s the only explanation.” 
“....Maybe not? There could be another reason.”
Lila had watery eyes and a sad frown on her face but inside, she was fucking smiling like a Cheshire cat. She made sure to be at school early so she can show the class the picture of Adrien’s little date last night. Who —predictably— were shocked at their sunshine child being with a guy and made plans to confront him about his supposed sexuality. 
She glowed at the thought of her plan working. This will teach Adrien to know his place or become a social pariah like his little friend Marinette. 
“I thought Adrien had feelings for me.” Lila wiped the “tears” from her eyes. “How could he lead me on like this when he’s been gay all along?” 
Alya —predictably— comforted her. “I’m pretty sure he’s just confused. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling.”
“I’m sure that’s it.” 
The pair didn’t notice Juleka and Rose glaring at them. 
.
Damian was not at all pleased. 
He was rightfully angry. 
How dare that poor sense of fashion taste trollop tried to shame his mon amour for being gay. How dare she try to say he was simply confused and didn’t know any better. How dare she defame his reputation because he holds nothing but spite for her person. 
How dare she. 
As Adrien’s boyfriend and future husband, it is his duty to correct this travesty and defend his Chaton’s honor. 
.
When the Damian Wayne, youngest son of Bruce Wayne, appeared at Françoise Dupont High School, you know that people are gonna stare and talk. 
When he headed towards the courtyard where Adrien and Marinette were sitting at, boy are things going to get juicy. 
Lila and her followers who were sitting a bit father from the outcast pair were utterly confused. They could possibly get Adrien knowing such a super hot celebrity but for him to be on good terms with Marinette too? How inconceivable. Absolutely flabbergasted. 
“Hey Lila didn’t you tell us you knew him and his family?” Max brought up. 
“Uhhh....” Lila knew she dug herself in a corner here. She never thought that the Damian Wayne would ever visit here. At this second rate school. 
“Well, let’s go, girl!” Alya exclaimed. “I’m sure Damian just hasn’t seen you. That’s why he didn’t walk towards you.”
Before proceeding to practically drag Lila to where Damian was talking with Adrien and Marinette. 
Lila, on the other hand, was cursing out Alya in a bunch of different languages in her mind while trying to come up with something to dig herself out of this mess. If they talk to Wayne, the class will realize she was lying all along. 
She was not going to lose control of her kingdom like this —well, not without putting up a fight. 
But when they and the rest of their classmates walked close to the trio, they were shocked when they saw Marinette playfully punching Damian in the arm. 
“Okay. How the hell are you so close with Damian Wayne?” Straight off the bat, Alya was on the offense as she glared at Marinette as if it was Mari who did something wrong. 
Damian answered before the bluenette could. His face was impassive and his glare cold. “I’m Ms. Dupain-Cheng’s top model for her fashion business.”
What? 
Even Lila was taken aback at the news. She knew that goody two shoes likes designing but she didn’t think anybody would actual buy her stuff. She didn’t think a Wayne would like her stuff. 
She could feel her fists clenched. How dare Marinette steal the spotlight again. 
“I’m also Adrien’s boyfriend.” Damian continued casually as if that wasn’t a huge bombshell. 
Everyone’s minds screeched to a halt. 
They knew about the possibility of Adrien being gay since Lila showed him on going on a date with an unidentified but clearly male person yesterday. But they didn’t think there was actually something there. 
Lila could feel her anger clouding her mind. Adrien was supposed to be hers. He was her ticket to fame and fortune. 
“And what about Lila? Aren’t you guys best friends?” Alya put her hands on her hips. How could Damian just ignore someone he is close friends with but give Marinette all the attention? Lila deserves better than that.  
Damian was unamused. “I don’t know her.”
“Yeah, you do.” Alya ignored Lila’s gestures to stop talking. Lila was too shy about her achievements and she was going to have her amazing best friend’s back. “She’s the one who helped your family out multiple times.”
“She did not. And I am appalled that you believe I would know a harlot like her in the first place.” Damian’s face twisted with disgust as he glanced at Liar-la like she was a mere insect. “Please. I have class and dignity.”
“Take that back!” She screeched. “You are so rude.” 
“Are you honestly going to lecture me on my rudeness when you plebians are being hypocrites?”
“What? I’m not a hyprocrite.” 
“Lila Rossi is a pathetic liar who begs for attention like street dogs beg for scraps. She never once saved Jagged’s cat nor does she help out with green charities. Lastly, she is not on close terms with myself nor with my family.”
“No! You’re lying!”
He raised an unimpressed eyebrow. “Ok then. Look her up on the internet. If she is as grand as you lot seem to think, she should have articles dedicated to her. Show me proof of her actions that isn’t your subpar blog and I will give you an exclusive.” 
Alya’s eyes gleamed at what should be an easy challenge. But when she pulled out her phone and typed Lila’s name and what she did in the search engine, her smile disappeared. 
She spent the next few minutes scouring the net for anything, any mention of a Lila Rossi that wasn’t on the LadyBlog. 
She found nothing. 
Lila Rossi was a fucking liar all along. And Alya and the rest of the class believed her. 
“We tried to warn you.” Marinette said in a soft voice. But anyone who knew her knew she was trying to hold back her laughter. 
“Marinette,” Rose cried out as she realized the class has been total jerks to the one person who always had their backs. “We were horribly wrong. Can you ever forgive us?”
She shrugged. “I forgive you. But this doesn’t mean we’re friends again. Because we’re not. Seeing how easily you drop me for that liar without even looking for any kind of proof hurts and I’m not eager to be friends again. Maybe in the future but not right now.”
“That’s goes ditto for me.” Adrien added his two cents. 
Their former friends classmates wore gloomy expressions, utterly devastated at ruining their friendship with their Everyday Ladybug and Sunshine Child. 
And with that, Adrien and Marinette left the courtyard, with light hearts and heads held high. 
Damian shot the class a razor sharp grin. “Well, it’s been nice to meet you.” 
Everyone knew he meant anything but. 
“I always knew teenagers were prone to be foolish imbeciles. But seeing the collective stupidity of you people today made me realize that the bar can in fact be lowered.” 
.
Adrien was fucking ecstatic. 
Elated. Overjoyed. Jubilant. Drunk on happiness. All the synonyms associated. 
Because Lila was finally exposed. The class realized what utter assholes they have been. His father will receive his due (soon according to Mari and Dami). 
He was happily humming a tune as he swung his and Damian’s intertwined hands back and forth. 
He was entirely grateful that Damian showed up to school today. Although he was a bit mean for Adrien’s taste. 
But oh man. Payback was so sweet. 
He smiled giddily. 
Mister Hot-And-Sexy definitely earned himself a kiss. 
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svtkillua · 4 years ago
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little lion man > 2
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rating: [pg-13 / angst] pairing: bakugou katsuki x reader x todoroki shouto warnings: cursing, lots of yummy angst >:)) word count: 11.3k listen while you read here!
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ch.1 + ch.2 + ch.3 + ch.4 (final) + alt. ending
A broken heart was a nuisance, an annoying leech that sucked the life out of you every moment you paused to think about the pain it was spreading through your limbs. Every second you spent with your mind not occupied you wanted to scream and cry. It felt like your emotions were burning embers and anytime you paused to give it oxygen the fire would grow and consume you til you were nothing but ashes.
You  had been on a roller coaster for a week straight, you had highs and lows and every dip and turn was filled with Bakugou. He was in your favorite songs and covering your walls. He was in your brain and in your vision and filled your senses down to your atoms that made you alive. Sometimes you felt angry, sometimes you felt happy, but mostly you felt so incredibly sad.
You’d managed to, mostly, get Bakugou off your case after repeatedly insisting you’d just been surprised and upset at the possibility of losing him. It wasn’t technically a lie, you were definitely surprised when he’d announced his plans to get engaged. To say you hadn’t seen it coming would have been an understatement.  You conveniently left out that your heart had been crushed and that you’d never suffered a pain more severe in your entire life thus far. It had felt like you got hit head on by a speeding train that you’d been too slow to dodge.
Now was the hard part; to continue to act like you were okay, like you couldn’t wait to watch him get married and see them began their happily ever after. You were pinning your emotions to the back of your mind and tying them down with a neat little bow because you needed to. You would be the best friend Bakugou deserved and yearned for right now, even if it made you feel like your insides were rotting.
All of it was frustrating. It was frustrating he didn’t love you but you so unwaveringly loved him. It was frustrating he could so easily tell when something was wrong with you and made it so much harder for you to lie. It was frustrating that every moment alone felt like torture because all you could think of was him with her and there was nothing to distract you. He had been your distraction when you’d been hurt before, and now he was unknowingly the cause and couldn’t be the cure.
Maybe you’d just feel this sad, heartbroken and lonely forever. Maybe you’d always be stupidly in love with someone whose heart was taken. Maybe you were foolish for thinking you could’ve had a chance if you tried harder. Maybe you’d be alone and in love til the day you died with someone you’d never have and would never want you. Maybe that was your fate in life, to have a permanent fake smile and empty feeling in your chest.
It was all affecting you more than you could let on, though you were mostly convincing, sometimes even to yourself. It was like your brain had turned to stone and got chipped to pieces too small to make coherent thoughts other than how awful you felt at times. You just needed to ignore the gnawing in your chest that had been so consistent lately it was becoming a part of you. Then you would be fine, you had to be.
For Bakugou.
He was obviously worried about you, even after the long phone call and a few days passing. He’d been calling more frequently and every time his voice would waver on the edge of concern when your tone wasn’t quite right. Whether or not he trusted what you had told him didn’t matter, because you could hear the worry lacing his tone when he’d repeatedly asked if you were okay. It only solidified your decision to put your feelings aside and focus on him, because you loved him too much to egg on the anxiety you were causing him. Besides, there was no reason for the both of you to be living a pained existence.
Convincing yourself that locking your feelings behind a perfect smile would be easy had been step one, though in the far parts of your mind you knew it wouldn’t ever work. Now, you just had to actually put that thought into action and try to be there for him. Perhaps the self sacrifice would persuade the universe to give you a break.
The wind whipped at your cheeks as your eyes squinted into the cool air blowing your hair away from your face. Your feet made soft clapping sounds against the pavement as you took a quick peek towards Bakugou’s building, the large inconspicuous residence you hadn’t been to in months. Perhaps it felt more intimidating because you’d be alone with Bakugou for the first time in a long time. The thought made your abdomen twist uncomfortably, the wind shifting directions, your jacket flitting open.
The sky was a pale blue and dotted with soft looking white clouds, the streets slow but bustling as workers fled their jobs for lunch. The day wasn’t nearly as ominous looking as your last time seeing Bakugou had been, but your mind still felt restless as the front door came into view. Your fingers were wrapping around your phone before you could dwell on it, plucking it from your coat pocket, fingers to drumming across the glass.
To; Bakugou [ 15:04 ]:
I’m here come let me in it’s cold!
Coming over for a late lunch had been Bakugou’s idea after you’d been seemingly sticking to phone calls rather than visits in person when he had free time. He’d been complaining about it and you could only tell the boy no so many times before he’d multiply his suspicions and assume the worst. He opened the door after a few minutes, a breathtaking grin on his face as he promptly reached out and tugged you inside.
You were met with a gush of warmth as the door closed behind you, a content sigh slipping out as you hung up your coat and slid your phone into your back pocket for safekeeping. He flashed a relaxed smile as you slipped your shoes off, his body pulling yours in for a hug the moment you stood upright. You tensed for a second when his body molded into yours, but took a shaky breathe to relax, slithering your own arms around his waist.
“Missed you.” He hummed mutely and slowly slid his arms off of you, his tongue poking out to wet his lips as he looked down at you. His hands moved to your shoulders as he held you at an arm’s length, eyes examining your entirety.
“We talked on the phone yesterday, Katsu.” You quietly laughed and patted his chest with your palms out flat, dipping your body away from him as you moved further into his home. Something about being here had always made you feel content. Maybe it was because it smelled like he did when you’d hug him so tight he’d burn into your senses.
Your eyes flickered around the living room you hadn’t seen in so long, landing on picture frame after picture frame filled with photos of him and Camie. Sure, there were some mixed in of yourself, his family and the boys, but you could tell without counting that most of the new items in the room were featuring her. From the baby pink teddy bear sitting on a desk in the corner, to the several photos of the two of them dotting the white walls, her presence was made known.
Hatred wasn’t something you felt for her but jealousy without a doubt was. It wasn’t that you disliked yourself, you just had an ever expanding nagging in your brain reminding you of all the things she had you lacked. She was smart and graceful and kind and oh so beautiful, according to Bakugou. She had gotten his affections just by being herself and you were resentful that you being you apparently wasn’t enough to do the same. Not for him, at least.
He cared about her and that was so immensely obvious just by having seen the two of them interacting. It made your confidence deflate. All the things you so badly wanted to do with Bakugou, she would get. The memory of her kissing his lips and holding his hand replayed in your head like a sick movie designed to make you ill and you had to take a deep breathe to try to push that sickness away.
You followed Bakugou’s retreating back towards his kitchen, away from the taunting photos, where he’d set up a small lunch for the pair of you. A small smile spread on your lips as you sat, eyes watching him move around his kitchen to get you both drinks. You could see his lips moving but his words weren’t registering in your conscience, though he seemed to be talking about what he ordered you for lunch. All you could focus on was how relaxed he looked there in the kitchen with you, chuckling to himself about how much food he’d bought.
Little moments like this had been what made it so simple to develop feelings for him. He just seemed so close to you in those minutes when he was the most himself he could be, just talking about his day and moving without thinking. When you were alone like this he wasn’t Bakugou Katsuki the hero, he was Bakugou Katsuki, your idiot of a best friend who loved to make you smile.
Had you really been that stupid for thinking that maybe, somewhere, in the deepest parts of his heart, he had been falling in love with you too?  Had it been stupid to think that these moments alone had felt just a right as they had to you? How was it possible for you to have been developing such different feelings every single second of your time together? You had only ever been watching him when he had never really glanced at you, not in the way you yearned for.
“Here we go.” Bakugou sighed, finally settling into his seat, placing a mug of your favorite tea in front of you before he sipped some of his own. You noticed he was using the mug you’d sent him a couple months ago while he was on tour, shifting your eyes to his face as you picked up your utensils.
“Thanks, Katsu.” You smiled a small but genuine smile as you took a bite, your smile spreading as you took another, much bigger one. Bakugou’s light laughter made heat rush along your face as you narrowed your eyes at him.
“Shut up, I haven’t eaten all day.” You defended halfheartedly, taking another bite before snapping your chopsticks towards his face, which only made him laugh a bit harder, his head shaking from side to side.
“You just look cute with your cheeks all puffed out like that. Like a chipmunk or something.” He commented, using his finger tip to poke one of your food filled cheeks, making your eyes roll.
The two of you fell into your easy rhythm so quickly and it felt like for just a few minutes you didn’t have to keep your guard up. You didn’t need to pretend you were happy because simply being with Bakugou made you so much happier than you wanted to admit. You wanted so badly to hate him for making you feel this way, but you just couldn’t seem to.
You were both sipping your tea, plates mostly empty,  a huge amount of leftovers on the counter. The kitchen silent besides the quiet ticking of the clock on the far wall behind you, as it had been for a few moments since your conversation died out. His eyes had averted from yours when the silence fell, your own taking advantage of the beat in conversation,  trailing over the lines of his jaw and neck. You watched as his muscles moved when he swallowed and let out a small huff of air, it sounding a little strained.
His fingertip was dragging lazily along the rim of the mug he had set down, a drip of the brown liquid rolling down the side of the cup and pooling onto the table below it. Your knee bounced under the table as he took a slow inhale before he spoke, the anxiety bubbling in your stomach.
“Were you mad at me? The other night, I mean? Were you mad?” His eyes were avoiding yours as the words slipped out, perhaps because he knew this was the tenth time he’d asked you the past week if he’d done something wrong. To you, he had done something hugely wrong by loving Camie instead of you, but you couldn’t exactly tell him that without telling him everything, and that was a conversation you definitely weren’t having right that moment.
“Why would I have been mad at you Katsu?” You took a second to compose yourself before you spoke, not wanting to give yourself away or say something you shouldn’t. You knew if you kept avoiding this conversation he’d eventually grow agitated but you also had to tread carefully or he’d start figuring things out.
You lifted your cup up to your lips, which puckered to blow some of the steam away before you took a drink. His eyes shifted over to your, moving from your hands, to the mug, then up to your eyes, his own masked slightly by his lashes and messy, spiky pieces of hair. He ran his fingers through it to push it aside.
“I don’t know, I just…  I just feel like something changed, like we changed. I don’t want you to think that just because I’ll be married to Camie that we’re going to be any different. I wouldn’t ever let that happen to us.” His bottom lip tucked up under his teeth as he scrunched his face up some. His ruby eyes squinted closed as his lip slowly slipped out from under his teeth, lips pursing as he debated his words. “I know that everything seems really sudden, we’ve only really been together a year. I shouldn’t have expected you to be ecstatic when you barely know her.”
His voice was quiet but felt so loud in the space surrounding you, the air reverberating with the sounds. Everything had changed when he told you, you changed and you knew he could see the shift. The way he’d hugged you when he left made it obvious he knew you weren’t okay even if he appeared to be telling himself you were. You couldn’t have been sure why, maybe it was because Kaminari had walked in on your conversation, or perhaps it was because Camie had been there.
“She’s just so incredible, she’s so special to me. I don’t even know how I got lucky enough to get her. The idea of losing Camie now…” He trailed off his little rant, eyes moving away from yours and down towards his cup, staring at his spoon as he swirled it around. His head shook slightly as he tilted his head upwards so his eyes were on you again.
You were sure you loved him more than Camie never would. How was it possible for him to not see that you meant so much more to him than a friend? How could he for a second think that no one who love him again when you always had?
“I just, I can’t lose you, either of you. I need her but I need you too, so badly.” Bakugou’s gentle tone felt like he was trying to calm you down, like he didn’t want to awaken the sadness in your heart he wasn’t sure was there inside you. “No matter what happens with me and her I’m always going to care about you and need you, here, with me.”
Was it possible to be dumped by someone you were never dating? You felt like he was giving you the talk when all you’d ever done was daydream from a safe distance about what it would be like to be his. Why did he feel the need to explain how much he needed her when you didn’t need convincing that he was in love with her? You thought you were the only one not acting like yourself, but seeing Bakugou’s eyes now darting between yours made you question that.
“Katsu, I know you love her, I know you need her. Relax. You know you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” It was the truth, Bakugou never needed to explain himself to you, and right now you didn’t particularly want him to. You could only listen to him fawn over her so much before you’d start feeling like you were being suffocated. “I just want you to be happy Bakugou, no matter what.”
He stayed still for a moment, his fingers having grown motionless against the cup as he focused in on you. He was scrutinizing you, trying to read your thoughts and find out your very secrets you were struggling to hide. You’d thought you’d been convincing but perhaps you weren’t as good of an actress as you had thought.
The obnoxious ringing from his phone got the attention of both of your gazes, his screen lighting up and flashing with Camie’s name. You bit down hard on your bottom lip, standing up with your dirty cup and heading towards the kitchen sink as he cleared his throat behind you before answering.
“Hey…Yeah, sorry we were eating lunch.” You could hear bits of his conversation as you turned the water on and rinsed your cup out, glancing at him over your shoulder as he retreated from the room, phone pressed to his ear as his voice caught your ears again. “No, it’s just me and her.”
A quiet sigh left your lips once he was out of your line of vision and you tilted your head downwards, damp hands gripping the countertop. You could feel yourself getting worked up as you repeated him talking about her in your head.
In the movies and books they always made it seem like getting your heart broken was one quick moment, but it wasn’t. It was so slow. It was all consuming and would build and build until you finally couldn’t take it anymore. It would kick at your chest and turn your skin deep purple and blue. It would throw hammers at your ribs and rip apart the bones before yanking out your heart. It would squeeze it tightly and cut off the blood flow and make that pain grow and grow til it was all too much.
It was breaking you, the only question was what would be the final push to ruin you. How many more words of his love for her could you take?  You were barely making it as it was, your eyes were lined in dark circles makeup couldn’t quite cover up, your body sluggish and mind in a fog. You could only ignore the silent pain for so long before you were going to lose it, despite how hard you were trying to make it okay.
You placed the cup in the dish rack before padding your way through the house, looking for Bakugou, spotting his back in the crack of his bedroom door. Judging by the sound of his muffled voice he appeared to still be on the phone, his messy hair moving slightly as he shook his bit of head you could see.
“…just haven’t been alone for a while, that’s all. You know I wanna see you, too.” Was all you picked up as you walked past, going into his makeshift study. It was a small room with a desk, some bookshelves and a little keyboard in the corner. You shut the door behind you as you sighed, rubbing the bridge of your nose. You dropped down into the chair at his desk, using your foot to kick off the ground and give it a light spin.
The room was hushed besides the sound of the world outside coming through the barely cracked open window, the curtains fluttering in the breeze coming through. His space was littered with crumpled up papers and stacks of books and magazines so high you were surprised they hadn’t toppled onto the ground yet.
You sighed quietly as you slid your phone from your pocket, hair falling into your face like a curtain you were too lazy to move. You hummed to yourself as you noticed you had a text waiting from Todoroki and opened it with a tap of your finger, eyes flickering over the words.
Todoroki [ 15:44 ] :
Do you want to come over and watch a movie later? I got that new mystery thriller you wanted to see.
Your fingers drummed over the letters as you sent a quick response back, before setting your phone back into your pocket.
To; Todoroki [ 16:02 ] :
Sorry, was eating lunch with Katsu. That sounds great, I’ll text you once I’m home.
Your fingertip slid along the edge of the desk as you rocked side to side in the chair, eyes trailing along behind it before you paused, noticing his top desk drawer was ajar. Curiosity got the best of you as you slowly gripped the edge, giving it a gentle tug open. It was mostly junk, scrap papers and little notes tossed inside to be reread later. You moved to shut it when it caught your eye; a small, black, velvet box tucked safely in the back corner.
The air felt thick as you halted your movements, unable to tear your eyes away from the unassuming object as your lips parted to let out a sharp breathe. You hesitated before picking it up, your mind going a mile a minute at the possibilities of what could be inside. You held the box delicately in the middle of your palm, as if it could snap and bite you if you touched it wrong. Your breathing felt too labored, chest too tight as you rested your fingers against the top. The sinking feeling in your chest making you gulp for air as you shifted your weight anxiously.
The room felt to silence as you pulled the lid open and your eyes were met with a beautiful diamond ring. It took your brain a second to catch up with what you were seeing, the panic spreading through your veins before you could register that the box had contained exactly what you dreaded. It sparkled when the light hit it as your hand shook and you felt like the universe was mocking you, laughing at how pathetic you’d become.
It was incredible how a stupid piece of jewellery could make your mood plummet. You’d let your guard down too much today with him, you’d forgotten the reality of what was going on outside of the little bubble you’d climbed inside. You’d been idiotic to think you could pretend your feelings into nothingness, foolish even for even giving that kinda thought an ounce of your time. Your fingers shook some so you squeezed your hand tighter around the black velvet, bottom lip beginning to tremble instead.
It definitely wasn’t anything to scoff at, a large teardrop shaped, crystal clear diamond in the center. It had two smaller pink gems on the sides of it, the entire band covered in rosy stones with delicate gold swirls protruding behind the teardrop shape. It screamed Camie. It was elegant and graceful and the pink tones reminded you of the color her cheeks turned when she blushed.
You felt like you could vomit, staring at the perfect stone and thinking of how much it seemed like her. She was just as perfect, just as elegant, just as graceful.
It was no wonder he loved her and not you.
The trepidation that crept up your spine made your entire body tense up, like you’d been shoved in a bath of ice water. Your nose scrunched as you tried to swallow, aware of your loud breathing, fingers snapping the lid shut before you could stare anymore. All you could picture was him slipping it onto her finger and the image made you want to run so far away. Seeing the ring in person only solidified the plans he’d told you, you just hadn’t imagined you’d be seeing it beginning to happen so fast.
The damn perfect ring represented so much more to you than just being a ring. It was everything you weren’t, everything Bakugou loved and cherished all wrapped around in gold and covered in diamonds. It was everything you’d never be and never have and everything you wanted so bad it was crushing you inside. How could you have been so naive to let yourself get here? How could you let your heart be swayed so easily by one boy to the point where he held your whole being in his palm and could toss it aside whenever he pleased? You were just a stupid girl with stupid feelings for a boy who didn’t seem to understand how he could, and was, affecting yours with every move he made towards her.
A single tear slipped down against the side of your nose, your curled up hand rubbing it away as you pushed the box back in place and slammed the drawer shut with your knee. Your hands shook as you walked over and sat idly on the small cushioned bench in front of his keyboard, fingers curling into your palms to make hard fists against your thighs. A shaky breathe fell out as you squeezed your eyes closed, now thankful for the curtain of hair shutting the room around you out.
Your head lifted up towards the ceiling, eyes opening back up as another tear slid out of the corner, spilling along your temple and skimming the shell of your ear, your hand raising to absentmindedly wipe it’s wet trail away. You felt like you weren’t in your body anymore, like your systems had all shut down and put you on low power mode. You were weak, too weak to really cry and too stubborn to address the agony in your bones that was screaming for attention.
You turned your body towards the keyboard, back to the door as you stared down at the pristine white rectangles, mind blank. The keys were untouched while the actual body of the keyboard was littered with little notes and lyrics he’d apparently not wanted to forget. He had a little piece of music you’d given him to practice awhile ago set on the music stand, his messy handwriting all over it.
You wanted to leave. You needed to leave. You felt like you were drowning but no one could see you struggling.  Like your lungs were filling with water and you couldn’t scream for help, only now the water was pain and sadness and you couldn’t scream for help because no one could know you were being killed. No one could know because he couldn’t know.
Your fingers slid over the keys before you really thought about it, barely using pressure to play a somber tune, trying to simultaneously fill the void of silence but also quiet down the sound of your heart pounding in your ears.The emotions you had bubbling just below the surface made your body slouch forwards, eyes run dry but feeling tired.
Why was it that the one you wanted was the one you couldn’t have? Why did you have to fall in love with someone like Bakugou? He had become your everything without even knowing it. He was the sun and the moon and all the stars in the universe and you were just an admirer who stared at it all from a telescope. You’d never even gotten close to capturing him but somehow in your mind you had thought you would.
The quiet melody you played blocked out the sound of Bakugou sighing as he came in the room, but the sound of the door closing caught your attention enough to make your fingers stop their movements. His body sunk onto the bench beside you, a heavy exhale coming from his lips as his hands ran over his face unceremoniously.
“I’m sorry that took so long. It was Camie, she said to tell you hello.” Bakugou spoke with a half convincing smile, his forehead leaning over and resting against your shoulder. You could tell he was put off now, but didn’t want to push it, your mind lingering to the box hidden in the desk as his body relaxed against your side.
You hated how effortlessly he could make your nerves multiply at this proximity, he was barely even touching you but he somehow seemed to have total control over your body. Half of you loved having him so close, loved feeling his lips press into your covered shoulder and hearing his breathing slow. The other half of you, however, dreaded having him like this as it only seemed to make the painful state of your heart more prevalent. You could feel his tense muscles relax against your side, his breathing slowly evening out to his normal pace.
“Teach me to play what you were playing.” He broke the few minutes of silence with his voice, nudging you with his elbow and straightening his back out. His eyes flickered over the keys before he turned his head to look at you, his hair falling further against his forehead. “I’m a good student, I promise.”
You stared at him for a moment before silently nodding, seeing the small smile tug on his lips before you let your fingers repeat the quiet tune, your free hand rested on your lap and tapping the beat into your thigh. You glanced over at him once you finished, nodding towards the piano to indicate he should try.
He nodded his own head, fingers reaching forward and starting to slip ungracefully between each note, hitting the keys a bit too hard to make the melody sound right. You let out an involuntary quiet laugh, making him pout and turn his upper half towards you as he spoke.
“Don’t laugh at me!” He grumbled like a little kid, even stomping his foot lightly to make it the full package. It was almost funny how quickly his mood had shifted from disgruntled and quiet to his usual playful, hotheaded state.
“I’m sorry.” You quipped, laughter quieting down as you shook your head at him and tried to calm your nerves, “You’re just hitting the keys too hard, it has to be more gentle, like this.”
You shifted towards the instrument again, biting down on your bottom lip as you let your fingers float through the melody. You were barely ghosting over the keys, just enough to make an audible sound. Your body moved with the notes, throat vibrating with hums as you let the sounds fill the room.
When you glanced over at him to see if he was paying attention, you noticed his eyes weren’t on the keys, or even your hands, but on your face. He hadn’t noticed you were looking at him, he was too in his head to realize he’d been caught staring. Something about the way his eyes were glued to you, with his lips parted and his breathing slow made your stomach tie into a knot.
You cleared your throat, reaching over and patting his knee with a sigh, which seemed to pull him from whatever was going on in that brain of his. You felt your mind going fuzzy as you shook your head at him.
“You’re a horrible student, you’re not even paying attention.” You scolded, narrowing your eyes at him as if you were mad. He just flashed you a sheepish smile and laughed quietly, bumping his shoulder lightly into yours as he muttered a small apology. For a moment you swore you saw a blush on creep onto his cheeks.
“I got it now.” He defended, hands once again resuming their place on the keys, moving too quickly and too aggressively through the tune, perhaps even worse than before. You rolled your eyes, adjusting your body so it was closer to his before letting your hand fall on top of his above the keys.
“Like this, Katsu..” You mumbled, fingers laying atop of each of his, his body stilling for a moment before beginning to move with your guidance. You tried not to focus on how soft his skin felt against your palm, not daring to look at his face as you swallowed thickly. “You see? Soft, it sounds better this way.”
“Yeah.” His voice was quiet, like speaking too loud would be alarming with how pressed together your bodies were. You finally let your face turn towards his again and instantly realized it was a mistake. You were way too close and at this distance you could see every single detail Bakugou Katsuki had.
His eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks as his eyes flitted across your face, his tongue poking out of his soft looking lips to wet them. You could see all the tiny details on his face, like the tiny scratch on his cheek from fighting with whoever and how his long eyelashes danced upon his cheeks. His thigh was pressing into yours and your hands were still overlapped though his was no longer moving, which stilled yours. Your nerves that had felt so fried the past few days were suddenly running on overdrive and your brain wasn’t moving well enough to process what was going on.
He let out a shaky breath as his eyes focused in on yours and held them in place, his free hand lifting up and pushing your hair back behind your ear as he spoke.
“Thank you.” His voice was soft, but sounded loud in the silent space around you, his calloused fingers lingering there by your cheek and not moving away. His fingertips dragged across your cheekbone, thumb grazing the corner of your lip just barely but the touch felt too intimate. Your heart was pounding so hard you could feel the blood pumping through your veins, making your fingertips feel like there were drums banging in them.
You couldn’t move, glued to the spot as his hand under yours turned, your palms flush as he slotted his fingers through yours, his other hand slipping away from your face, leaving what felt like burns behind. His eyes moved away from yours and instead to behind you, towards his desk. You were close enough to kiss him, just a tilt of your head and your lips could be on his. Your ribs felt bruised from how hard your heart was thumping into them.  
Your eyes flickered over his face as his eyes remained glued to his desk and you silently wondered what he had said thank you for. Was it for, badly, trying to teach him to play the song, or something else? What had you done that was worthy of a thank you, and why was he holding your hand so tightly the longer he stared across the room? Why did he have to be so beautiful with the light flooding through the window casting a glow over his features? Why did it have to hurt so much to love him?
He swallowed hard, his thumb brushing across the face of your hand as his eyes finally moved to yours, a quiet sigh reaching your ears. He looked serious, his eyes definitive as he stared at you.
“Have you…have you ever thought ab-”
“Babe? Are you guys here?”
Camie’s voice cut off whatever Bakugou was going to say, his hand slipping from yours and his body springing away as if you’d scorched him. He was immediately standing up, eyes darting around the room, looking anywhere but at you as the door to the room opened, Camie’s smiling face meeting the both of yours. You felt an odd sense of nerves course through you for a moment, like you’d almost been caught doing something secret and immoral.
“What are you doing here?” Bakugou asked, his hand raising to scratch the back of his neck. He cleared his throat to try and clear out the waver in his voice, his body moving him a step closer to her.
“I got done with my class early and thought I would bring you guys some dinner.” Camie smiled brightly, giving you a polite wave hello before moving over to wrap her arms around her boyfriend. Bakugou glanced over at you once quickly before he wrapped his arms around her small middle, lifting her off the ground slightly when he stood up with her in his grasp. Her playful gasp and loud squeal had his laughter floating out so easily.
Watching him shift all his focus to her felt crushing, like the moment she showed up you no longer existed. Every step he took towards Camie was a million more away from you. To think for a second there you’d been imaging he was going to kiss you. Were you really that delusional?
The way they so simply made each other happy made you wanna scream. Camie was busy chatting away about her class to Bakugou, his head nodding though judging by the look in his eyes you could tell he wasn’t listening. His eyes were following her lips as they moved, his hands grasping her hips so she didn’t drift too far from him, but his brain wasn’t digesting the words.
You’d been living in a fantasy for a moment and Camie walking in brought you back to reality. You couldn’t keep letting yourself do this, you couldn’t give into how badly you wanted to be with him because this was what always followed. It wasn’t just self sacrificing, it was self destructive.
You tore your eyes away from the pair of them as you slid your phone from your pocket, throat constricted as you quickly texted Todoroki.
To; Todoroki [ 16:47 ]:
Change of plans, would you be able to come get me from Bakugou’s please? I don’t want to walk home, it’s too cold out.
“Did you wanna stay and eat with us?’ Bakugou’s voice met your ears as he spoke to Camie, your eyes on their feet as they shuffled closer to each other. You silently wondered if they’d forgotten you were in a room, Camie had barely even acknowledged your presence the entire time she’d been here. Your phone buzzed with a response, making you glance at it.
Todoroki [ 16:48 ]:
On my way, I’ll be there in a few minutes.
Camie’s giggling made you gaze up again, her trademark blush spread across her cheeks as Bakugou lightly let his fingers tickle her sides, his smile a tad more relaxed than it had been a minute or two ago. You rose to your feet, which made Bakugou look in your direction once quickly, his grip on Camie loosening enough for her to turn her body towards yours.
“I should probably get going, actually.” You said with a forced smile, desperately wanting to get out of the room you were trapped in with the happy pair. Because the truth was you weren’t fine, you weren’t sure you’d ever be fine. You were a wreck and you were forcing things to seem okay because you were too scared to face what may happen if you admitted they weren’t.
Remembering that engagement ring was hidden in the desk beside you made your blood run cold. Your fingernails dug half moons into your palms, bottom lip trembling as the tears threatened to spill while you desperately tried to force them down, starting to move out of the room. How were you supposed to do this? How did anyone do this? Those romantic movies were such shit, no one would want to fall in love if they knew this was how it was going to feel.  
You hadn’t known, and look where that got you.
“You don’t have to go.” Bakugou’s voice clicked in your mind as you exited the room, his footsteps trailing behind you as you made your way back towards the living room. The pictures of them on the walls now felt like they were there to mock you, to remind you that you weren’t wanted.
“We’d love to have you eat with us.” Camie insisted, appearing by Bakugou’s side as she slid her hand slowly into his, her sweet face twisted into a small frown as you slid your shoes back onto your feet. You hated how she answered for the both of them. Then again, Bakugou had invited her to join you both on behalf of the two of you. Maybe he just didn’t care if you wanted her there or not.
“It’s alright, you guys should have some alone time. Todoroki’s on his way already anyway.” You insisted, tugging on your jacket and noticing how Bakugou’s grip on her hand relaxed. Hers only tightened however, her body shuffling about as close to his as she could get without actually being against him. It made your body burn seeing how perfect they looked together, a vision of beauty and pain to your heart.
The room was mute for a moment as you got your jacket situated and buttoned up properly, fingers weaving through your hair and pushing it back off your face while Bakugou just stared. He pursed his lips slightly and then folded them in on themselves, making his mouth a straight, hard line. He looked dejected which you couldn’t quite understand. He had Camie here, he invited her to stay. Why would he be frustrated you were leaving? You knew he wanted you to like her but surely he didn’t expect you to be their constant third wheel.
Camie seemed to notice his quiet state and leaned up, kissing his cheek and frowning in concern as her free hand lifted up and cupped his chin, moving his face towards hers as she quietly asked if he was okay. The worry was clear on her features, her eyebrows furrowed as her thumb drew gentle circles on the curve of his cheek, his head barely nodding in response. You were beyond grateful to hear the knock on the door, turning your body and tugging it open without hesitation.
Todoroki stood with his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans, a dark colored sweater on his top half making him look soft. He had been looking at his shoes, his head lifting up when you answered and a smile spreading on his famous lips.
“Hey.” He spoke, stepping forward to pull your body into his hard chest, arms holding you tight for a small hug, your eyelids fluttering shut and savoring the warmth of his sweater covered chest against your cheek. “You ready to go?”
You nodded and pulled away from him, turning to bid the couple a goodbye, Bakugou staring at you with that unreadable look on his face again. His eyes were on your back, then on Todoroki, his jaw clenched uncomfortably and his free hand balled up into a loose fist. You moved your body forward to his, his demeanor relaxing as he slid his arms around you.
His hug felt different than Todoroki’s, his was hard and made your body crush into his, his palms encasing your back like a shield and his breath fanning across your cheek as he leaned his head down. You were surprised when his lips puckered against your cheek considering Camie was beside him, but she didn’t seem to have much of a reaction other than an uncomfortable clearing of her throat.
“I’ll see you later, Katsu, thank you for lunch.” You said quietly, pulling from his tight grip and rubbing your hands along your forearms anxiously. He simply nodded but said nothing back as you turned away from him. You followed Todoroki out the door, taking a deep breath of the crisp air outside once the door clicked shut behind you. Your muscles were achy and sore as you moved towards the car, body exhausted from the few hours there with Bakugou.
You felt like you’d gone through every emotion, from happy to sad to confused and back again. Your ability to keep it together was becoming paper thin, your mind foggy and begging to just be silent for a few hours. The tiny rope holding you together was being plucked apart string by string and was ready to snap.
The only question was when.
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The taste of the expensive alcohol on your tongue was doing little to dull your senses in the crowded expensive restaurant. The private back room you occupied was lavish, with high ceilings and a dazzling chandelier that sparkled in the dim lighting. The air felt hot and the music was so inaudible it might as well have been turned off.
Your dress was too stuffy, your thighs sticking to the faux leather seat beneath you as you shifted and tugged the too thick material. You were uncomfortable here. Uncomfortable under the gleam of all the expensive things.
Uncomfortable in the stupid dress that made you feel like you were being choked. But most of all, uncomfortable being sat at the end of the table where you had a perfect view of Bakugou and Camie, side by side and feeding each other bites of their dinners.
You didn’t know how you’d been forced to come to Camie’s birthday dinner, Bakugou had insisted she wanted you to come and since most of the boys were coming you’d given in. You were sat between Kaminari and Kirishima. Midoriya, Sero, and Todoroki were across from you at the large wooden table. You hated being here. You hated being subjected to watching the happy couple kiss and hug all night long like some form of specific torture catered towards your secrets and insecurities.
It all felt too much, them so in love, the sound of her friends loud laughter and chatting, the way Kaminari kept catching you staring at Bakugou, the tight anxious feeling in your chest every time Bakugou took a second to glance your way, all of it. Your nerves were at max capacity, body nearly buzzing from the emotions bottled up inside you and all you wanted to do was go home.
You sighed quietly, taking another sip of your drink as you glanced over at Kirishima, who had let out a bored grumble, making you crack a tiny smile. The youngest boy looked like he’d rather be anywhere but there, his arms folded lazily over his broad chest and the corners of his lips just barely turned downwards as he spoke.
“I don’t like her.”
You nearly choked on the sip of your drink you’d just swallowed, Kaminari’s large hand clapping at your back to make sure you could breathe while Midoriya’s eyebrows narrowed across the table at Kirishima.
“That’s not polite, Kirishima.” He scolded, taking a small bite of the food in front of him. Kirishima scoffed quietly as he sat up properly and picked up his own drink, speaking as he lifted it up to his lips.
“Don’t you think this is all a bit much for a birthday party?”
You bit down on your bottom lip as you set your glass down, eyes skimming over the other boys as they remained tight lipped, though Kaminari was bouncing his leg beside yours. Your last birthday you’d spent watching movies and eating pizza with Sero, Kirishima and Tokoyami while Todoroki baked you a cake and Bakugou insisted he did all the decorating. You’d just assumed this was going to be a small dinner, not this lavish affair it seemed to have become, her friends all in expensive looking outfits and the prices on the menu you’d seen astronomical. You could understand Kirishima’s distaste for location choice, it wouldn’t have been your first choice either.
“She’s been all over him all night like she’s trying to show him off.” Kirishima added and set his glass down after taking a swig, his hand overlapping as he folded them neatly in front of his body at the table. “So I don’t like her, period. I don’t really care if that’s rude.”
You took a glance down towards the other end of the table as Midoriya started lecturing Kirishima, muting out their conversation and letting your eyes wander over Bakugou as he took a bite of his food. Camie was chatting away with her friends beside him, his tongue poking out to lick his lips off as his eyes glanced over at her.  His arm moved slightly from its grip around the back of her chair, instead wrapping around her shoulders. A smile tugged on her lips that made jealousy rage in the pit of your stomach from the simple gesture. It killed you to know you’d never have that with him, as much as you were trying to pretend it wasn’t hurting you.
You were scared of what would happen when you let the floodgates open. How were you ever going to move on if you let yourself feel just how deeply those emotions for Bakugou ran? You had been rooted to the same spot for so long hoping that maybe, just maybe, the impossible would happen, but deep in the back of your mind you knew that time was never going to come. That was becoming more obvious with each passing day.
When Bakugou’s eyes flickered towards your end of the table, he paused for a moment, gaze catching yours and you held it, swallowing down the lump that threatened to grow in your throat. He stared at you hard, his expression not changing and his eyes too hard to read from so far away, though you doubted there was any meaning behind them. He’d been distant the past few days, like you’d hurt him and he was pulling away and while it stung, part of you had been thankful for the time to try and put yourself together.
But you missed him, gosh did you miss him. You missed him every second you weren’t with him, even when being with him was murdering your mental state. It was like he was a drug and you were an addict waiting for their next fix. Only with Bakugou, coming down from the high felt more like plummeting off a cliff and landing right on your back, all the air being thrown out of your body along with any signs of happiness.
When Camie turned towards him and spoke something into his ear, his eyes moved away, a smile on his lips as he responded to whatever they were talking about. You pulled your own eyes away, feeling a pair burning into your face and looking over at the source. Todoroki, who you’d caught sending you looks all night. He’d been like your saviour all week, letting you stay at his place when yours felt too lonely, never asking any questions or pushing you to tell him why you weren’t acting like yourself. You knew he had noticed, if anyone was perceptive it was Todoroki, he never missed a thing.
Kaminari cleared his throat beside you, fingertip poking your cheek and gaining your attention as he smiled sweetly in your direction, nodding towards your plate of untouched food as he spoke.
“Are you okay? You’ve barely eaten.” His head tilted to the side, a small frown spreading on his pouty lips and his shoulders slumping, as if your lack of consumption completely deflated his mood.
“I’m alright, just not very hungry. Don’t worry, Kami.” You smiled faintly at him, patting his hand lightly and kissing his cheek, his head bobbing up and down as if he understood. Of course you weren’t hungry. How could you be hungry when you kept watching him kiss her? It made you want to expel everything in your body every time you saw it.
You sighed quietly and pushed your chair out, excusing yourself as Camie’s friends all quieted down to hear the story she was telling them. Bakugou’s fingers were drawing lazy shapes on her bare shoulder blade, your eyes tearing away as you made a silent b-line for the restroom, desperate for a second alone.
The minute the bathroom door closed behind you, you sighed heavily, leaning your back into the hard black door and closing your eyes. You were on the edge of a mental breakdown, your brain on overdrive to even keep you functioning. You were holding too much in. You didn’t want to hurt anyone else’s heart in the process of hurting your own, but could barely handle the feelings consuming you alive.
Your body moved over to the large mirrors above the sink, eyes wandering over the black lace dress that landed mid thigh. You always thought made you look good. Now you thought it made you look depressed, the fabric climbing halfway up your neck and covering the entirety of your arms, it hugging your hollow figure too tight to hide any imperfections you thought you had. It was a stark contrast to the lilac strapless number Camie had gone with. It only amplified how different you both were, neither bad, but one clearly superior in the eyes of Bakugou.
It was a terrible feeling to watch yourself be replaced. Of course you were never the one who filled Bakugou’s heart, but Camie was slowly taking your place in every other way. She was whose pictures covered his walls and whose presents littered his shelves. She was who he sang songs to late at night over the phone and she was the one who kept his attention when she was in the room. You were becoming more obsolete every second she became more relevant.
After a quick splash of water and a few deep breathes, you adjusted your body to stand up straight, hair pulled half back up off your face for once. You slowly pushed the heavy bathroom door open, giving yourself a mental pep talk as you exited the hallway towards the backroom, aware of the eery silence that filled your ears. Why did it make your skin crawl to hear so little chatter?
You scrunched your face up just as you entered the room, confused as to why Bakugou and Camie were standing and no one was speaking, Bakugou’s back to you and Camie’s eyes flickering to yours for a second, before focusing back on him. That was when his body sunk down to the floor and onto one knee, your body halting all movement.
This wasn’t happening.
This couldn’t be happening.
But it was.
Right before your very eyes were you watching Bakugou Katsuki crush the very last piece of you.
Gasps filled the air along with excited squeals as he looked up at her, Camie’s delicate hand lifting up to her mouth and covering it in shock, her own eyes filling with tears just as yours were, only hers were of happiness and yours most definitely were not. You saw his reflection in the mirror on the wall, his hands holding open the same velvet box you’d found a few days before, the ring sparkling under the faint light. The world felt like it stopped spinning, your lungs stopping all functions as his eyes met yours in the reflection for just a second, his firm expressing softening for just a second before his eyes tore away from yours, the words flying past his lips without a second thought.
“Camie, will you marry me?”
Hearing the words out loud was the final snip to the string holding you together. Everything began to crumble apart inside you, your cool exterior melting away. Her friends had all burst into cooing and clapping at her exclaimed yes, your body the only one unmoving while the girls all rushed over to see her ring. Your feet started carrying you backwards, your eyes burning and blurry as you saw his body turn towards yours for just a glance. Camie gripped at his arm and pulled him tight to her side as her friends all congratulated them, everyone fawning over them.
Kaminari was staring at Bakugou, then at you, then back at Bakugou, Kirishima complacently beside him looking unimpressed. Todoroki was already moving towards you, pushing past the crowd around them to get to you as you backed up out of the room, whipping around to leave. Your body pushed forward, bumping into a waiter and spilling a drink on yourself but you didn’t stop, rushing out the front doors uncaring about the scene you were causing.
You burst out the front and felt your resolve crumble completely, your body collapsing forward as you stumbled out and a choked sob ripped from your throat. You couldn’t hide it anymore, you didn’t care if it was selfish, you couldn’t pretend you were okay. You weren’t okay, you were so damn far from okay.
The air was filled with the sounds of your loud crying, your entire body shaking as you looked around for somewhere to go, some sign of what to do, struggling to breathe. All you could see in your head was Bakugou down on his knee in front of her and his voice repeating over and over.
He was everywhere, you couldn’t escape him. He was in your head making it hazy and in your eyes making them burn and boil over. He was in your lungs squeezing your airway til it was crushed and nothing could pass through. He was in your very nerves making sure you felt each and every touch he’d ever given you then ripped away. He was in your heart tearing out every last string holding it together until you snapped. You couldn’t do it anymore, it hurt too much.
You struggled to stay standing, seeing spots of black as you tried to stretch straighter. The door behind you opened but you were too weak to turn away. A pair of firm arms enveloped you and that only seemed to make your next wave of tears so much stronger. They were spilling down your cheeks and wetting your flushed skin, the cool wind blowing making your cheeks feel frozen.
You gripped at the strong body’s shirt and bawled into the chest, nostrils flared and mouth wide as you tried to get in oxygen. Your eyes screwed tightly shut as you blocked out the sound of the world around you. You recognized the feel of the hand stroking your hair and dug your nails into his back.
“I love him, Todoroki.” You sobbed, the words coming out choppy, trembling lips having difficulty forming the syllables. “I love him so fucking much.”
“I know.” Todoroki whispered, his grip around you growing more firm as he lifted you off your legs when they went to give out. You’d tried so hard, so so hard to ignore your feelings and you just couldn’t anymore.
You were never going to be his first choice. You were never going to get to hold him and kiss him and tell him how much you loved him. You were never going to be his entire world like he had been yours. Camie was, perfect Camie who had everything you didn’t, and now she had him too.
“Why doesn’t he love me? Why does he love her and not me?” You croaked, arms constricting around his shoulders as his hands gripped below your thighs to keep you steady. “Why am I not enough?”
Todoroki didn’t say anything, his thumbs pressing soft circles into your skin as he kissed his heart shaped lips into your forehead. You bit down hard on your bottom lip to try and hold back the screams you wanted to let out. You tasted metal and released it, using a hand to wipe the tears and snot off your face to no avail. Your eyes wouldn’t quit flowing, like a busted pipe that had been blocked up for years and finally sprung free.
Everything was falling from your lips too fast for you to comprehend, every coherent thought spilling out in cries too loud for such a public space but you couldn’t bring yourself to care, this had been a long time coming.
“I tried so hard to be happy for him. I tried so hard.  Nothing I do is making it any easier, it hurts to look at him. I hurts to think about him, I just want it all to stop. “ You faintly felt one of his hands leave your thigh, the other hand sliding across your backside to stop you from falling to the ground. You heard keys and lifted your head slightly to see he was carrying you to his car parked near by, your voice muffling when you laid your head down against his chest. “I can’t do it anymore.”
His hands slid off your body as he leaned you into the door on your own two feet, a hand on your hip to make sure you wouldn’t fall, before turning toward the door to unlock it. Your crying was subsiding but the ache in your chest was only growing. The tears started coming back however when you heard the door of the restaurant open and footsteps rushing your way.
Bakugou was jogging towards the pair of you, Kaminari hot on his trail and you felt your whole body start to seize again, the tears returning tenfold as you covered your face with your hands, turning into Todoroki as he moved to cover you from Bakugou’s worried figure.
“I’m taking her home, she doesn’t feel well so just go back inside, okay? Go celebrate.” You could make out Todoroki’s words despite the way you were hiccuping as you tried to choke back your crying. Even when you were having a breakdown you didn’t want Bakugou to know, you didn’t want to ruin his night. You wanted to smack yourself for caring so much.
“Shut up, Todoroki.” Bakugou snapped, trying to get around Todoroki who was unmoving. Bakugou’s hand reached out to touch your arm, but you flinched away, turning your back to him and facing the car as your knees shook, hand clamping over your mouth to keep your crying silent. “Please look at me, please? Please talk to me, stop shutting me out. Please?”
The concerned begging made it worse, he was the reason you were like this. Had he just proposed tonight to make sure your heart was broken as possible? Did he love to be the one to make you miserable? Did he make sure you were there to see it so you wouldn’t keep thinking maybe he could love you too?
“Fucking go inside Bakugou, you’re making it worse.” Todoroki snapped and his figure tensed behind you. Your back shook with each gasp for air you took, vaguely seeing Kaminari touch Bakugou’s shoulder in the rear-view mirror.
“Katsu, cmon. She doesn’t want to talk to you right now.” Kaminari’s unusually soft voice met your ears, the only one who seemed to be calm in the entire situation, though when his eyes met your reflection in the mirror, his face screamed concern. Whether it was for you or the distraught Bakugou you weren’t sure.
“Will you both fucking shut up and let her speak for herself!” Bakugou snapped, the sound of his feet moving making you clam up, his figure coming around Todoroki who was still trying to block Bakugou from seeing you. The moment Bakugou’s face met yours from over Todoroki’s shoulder, his entire face fell, your own twisting in anguish as you started crying harder again, looking away from him.
“Why..” He started quietly, his hands lifting as if to reach out for you but Todoroki smacked them down, yanking open the car door so you could get inside, effectively creating a barrier between the two of you.
“Because you’re an idiot, Bakugou.” Todoroki sighed, shutting the door once you were inside and instantaneously muffling the voices outside the door. You chest was trembling with every inhale you took, hands shaking as you dug your nails into your thighs and squeezed your eyes shut. Everything you had was broken, everything felt ruined and tarnished and sick.
You didn’t feel like you anymore and you didn’t think you’d ever feel right again, not now. Not now that you saw him choose her right before your very eyes. Right after he looked at you did he shatter everything you’d been so desperately hoping for. Your heart you had so willingly given him he tossed to the ground and smashed under his expensive shoes, then crushed the pieces to dust so they could never be put back together. He did it all with five short, little words.
You couldn’t love someone who wouldn’t ever love you, not anymore.
When you dared to glance out the window you could see Todoroki coming towards the driver’s side door, Kaminari trying to tug Bakugou toward the restaurant. Bakugou’s eyes were glued onto your tinted window, not listening to a thing the taller boy said, a pained expression on his face that paled in comparison to the agony in your chest.
Camie’s head came out from the doors, concern painted on her features as she slipped between Kaminari and Bakugou, her arms sliding around her fiance and hugging him. Her ring glittering in the nighttime lighting made you tear your eyes away, the car moving finally and taking you away from there. You shivered but you weren’t sure if it was from the temperature or from your heart rate.
You felt empty, even as the tears fell silently down your cheeks and slid onto the dress that bunched around your thighs. Your heart was gone and your lungs were empty and your brain was consumed with all the things Bakugou had ever done that made you hurt the most. You heard his voice telling you she was the one. You felt his fingers rubbing into your palm as he held your hand and his lips pressing into your cheek. You saw him kissing her and holding her and getting down on one knee. You felt everything he’d ever done that made your heart ache, and all you could do was sit there and take it.
Bakugou wasn’t yours anymore.
He never was in the first place.
And you were an idiot for ever thinking he could be.
Todoroki’s hand wrapped around your knee, rubbing the ice cold skin as you chewed on the inside of your cheek, willing yourself to just breathe. You took slow, deep inhales through your flared nostrils, body twitching from the erratic cries your body was still producing.
“It’s okay. You’re gonna be okay.” Todoroki’s gentle tone fell on your deaf ears, your nails digging into your thighs so hard they left angry red scratches in their wake. It felt like the earth was opening up and swallowing you whole. You swallowed hard, eyelids falling shut as you tipped your head to the side so it rested against the cool window.
You lifted your legs up, his hand slipping away as they bent in front of you on the leather seat, your arms wrapping around them. You had goosebumps risen along your calves, your body slouching into the door. You could see your face in the rear view mirror when you opened you eyes, your complexion gaunt and eyelids rimmed in smeared black.  Little grey streaks were spread across your face from the wind blown tears mixing with your watered down mascara, your lip swollen from biting down so hard. You looked like you had finally given up, like nothing in the world could take away the pain in your heart.
“I don’t think I am, Sho.” You whispered, voice cracking as you let your eyes slip back shut “Not this time.”
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pennyserenade · 3 years ago
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Miranda!!!!! Happy milestone!!!! I'm so proud of you ❤️ you deserve all the recognition in the universe, your art always manages to move me and i admire you so, so much 🥰🥰🥰
If I may, I'd like a drabble for Din Djarin?
Congrats!!! 🥳🥳🥳
PEDROPASCALDICE HIT 400 !
Thank you so, so much Lela. I wouldn’t be anywhere without being like you--especially you--because your kind words always motivate me and I love, love, love putting my writing out there to share with you! Here is a sad, yearning filled drabble about my favorite Tin Can Man. I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to write anything for him. Warnings: a smidge of angst and a whole lot of yearning. It’s my speciality. Gif by: @scifisblog
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ALL FOR US
It wasn’t supposed to feel like that, was it? It didn’t hurt, not always, but sometimes, most times, it felt like too much. It was like he was always too close to doing something his instincts had protected him against his entire life, but somewhere along the way they’d stopped working for him. 
He couldn’t sense where the pleasure ended and the pain would begin. Couldn’t imagine a time where his chest didn’t feel so full, either though; a time where he didn’t feel so loved. She loved him, it was true, he knew that much. She loved him as one, not as a collective. She had seen past his armor even if he’d never taken it all off for her, and even farther than that--she’d been allowed inside, past the flesh that felt foreign even to him when he peered at it. He’d given her access to the part of him that had only ever remained his, the last thing in the world he could ever claim for himself, because there was nothing he found himself wanting to restrict her from. He felt her. She felt him.
They’d never taught him of the force, not really. He’d scarcely been made aware of it, but when he grew old enough to be allowed above, it wasn’t a thing he’d had to worry about much. It was a relic, little more than some tale told across the galaxies by those who remembered to inspire hope. 
He’d stumbled into her by happen-chance once, and then he couldn’t stop stumbling into her; she bleed into his dreams, then into his waking thoughts, until eventually he craved her. She could sense everything that was too strong in him. If he suffered, she knew. If he loved, she knew. There was not a place on this earth where he could hide from her, least of all the helmet that covered his features. So, he decided to take it off, to show her what he was in the least true form, but also, the realest one he could offer her. 
“Oh,” was what she made of him. But then, “Oh, Din.”
Like a frightened child, he held still in his place in front of her, wordless. Not alone, he told himself, hands tightening around the helmet in his hands. He was with her. This was what he needed, what he wanted. 
He’d not grown up knowing faces, or even people. He’d grown knowing himself as a part of a whole, of knowing pain and going forth, despite opposition. He’d grown knowing quiet and knowing hidden, and then one day, unexpectedly, he felt he had woke up and known so much more. 
The crevices of her body, for example, which he had explored in the dark but seen vividly despite it; the feel of her lips, whether they were ghost touches or real, it didn’t matter; the scent of her, sweet and rich and all consuming; the sound of her voice, comforting and soft, but strong and determined when need be. He had visited many planets and been taught many things about survival, but it was her who had told him that in his chest was love, and it was her who has brushed her body against his out of love. She was the very first person who had brought him in her arms and let him be the young boy who’d been abandoned that day. She let him into her life and told him of the force that resided in her (and in him, she had whispered, just a little because he was alive and it was in all things alive. This was something her father had told her, but she didn’t know where he was now. Maybe with Din’s parents). She let him in her life and in turn, she gave him much of it. 
So he gives her this. The very last bit of himself that he’d been told to give no one.
He reaches out, despite the ache, despite the too much, and grabs her hand. He brings it up to his face, lets it rest there as he maintains eye contact with her.
“For you,” he tells her, nodding. “All for you.”
“You’re not alone,” she whispers, water gathering in her eyes. “Not alone at all, Din.”
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k-and-the-arts · 4 years ago
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Lover - Willex
Pairing: Alex Mercer/Willie Word Count: 2412 Based on Taylor Swift’s song “Lover.” Read on AO3
We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January
And this is our place, we make the rules
And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear
Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?
 It all happened so fast. One minute, Alex was walking down Sunset Boulevard, clearing his head, and the next minute he was getting run over by a gorgeous boy on a skateboard. He wanted to be mad, he really did, but when the boy started talking, all anger dissolved. The skater was charming and dorky and was able to convince Alex to follow him after exchanging only a few words. 
Willie guided Alex to his favorite spot on Sunset Boulevard -- a simple bench that was “the best place to people-watch” as the skater had said. People in weird furry costumes and outfits of dead celebrities walked by, but Alex only had eyes for Willie. The brunette talked about everything that popped into his head, and none of it seemed to have a coherent flow. He mentioned his favorite places to skate, random facts about the ocean, and weird ways different famous people died. The blonde talked about his friends, the band, and the one time they ate street dogs that were so bad, they had food poisoning for three days.
“Reggie was convinced we were going to die,” Alex had told Willie, causing the other boy to burst into a fit of giggles that sounded like music to Alex’s ears. 
The drummer didn’t say much after that; he was content with listening to Willie’s voice and all of the stories that fell from his lips. He loved watching the way Willie’s eyes sparkled when something he was talking about reminded him of another topic, and it amazed Alex that the boy knew so much about everything.  
There was a lull in the conversation as the sun started to set, painting the sky in beautiful shades of purples and pinks and oranges. Willie was watching the sky but Alex was watching Willie. There was a dazzling glow around the boy that made him look ethereal. A small gust of wind blew through the street, causing Willie’s long hair to float gracefully around him. Alex’s breath caught in his throat and he tried to take it all in. He wanted to replay this moment in his mind over and over again for as long as he could remember it. 
There was suddenly a small, sharp pain in his chest; a sign of his anxiety taking over. He tried to push it down, push it away. His instincts told him to run, this is happening too fast, but his heart told him to keep his feet planted firmly to the ground. He had never felt so smitten about someone so quickly before and it was the most exciting yet terrifying thing he had ever felt. 
Even though they had been talking for only a few hours, Alex felt like he had known the skater his entire life. It felt like they were childhood friends, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. But Alex knew there was still so much to learn, and his heart ached for so much more. 
As the sky grew dark, Willie’s gaze floated back to him. Alex quickly looked away, focusing his attention on the fairylights on building awnings and edging that had created an intimate glow around them. If Willie had caught him staring, he didn’t say anything, and Alex appreciated that. 
“I love leaving the Christmas lights up until January,” Willie said suddenly, causing Alex’s eyes to snap back to the boy that was beautifully sculpted under the soft light.
“Hmm?” Alex hummed, hoping Willie would continue.
Willie gestured to the fairylights above them. “I didn’t get to experience a lot of proper Christmases growing up,” Willie said quietly, as if talking too loudly would shatter the tension that had grown around them. “I want to experience Christmas for as long as possible. So I try to leave the lights and decorations up for as long as Caleb will let me, which is usually in January.” 
The question was on the tip of Alex’s tongue -- Who’s this mysterious Caleb? 
But he stayed silent, nodding to acknowledge Willie’s words. He knew Willie would tell him if he asked, but he needed something to look forward to when they talked again. If they talked again.
Willie opened his mouth to speak again but the sound of smooth jazz interrupted him. The brunette pulled his phone out of his pocket and sighed. He ignored the call but stood up from the bench, slipping the phone back into his pocket and placing the helmet back on his head. 
“It was really nice to meet you, but unfortunately I have to go. I’ll catch ya later, Hotdog,” Willie smirked, letting his board drop to the ground.
 Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
And ah, take me out, and take me home
You're my, my, my, my
Lover
  Alex wanted to run after him, wanted to follow him home. He immediately missed Willie’s warmth and light and yearned to be by his side again. He rewatched the entire afternoon in his mind like a movie, and by the time he made it back to the studio, his cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Julie and Flynn begged him to tell them everything, while Luke, Reggie, and Bobby teased him mercilessly. But he didn’t tell him any details and ignored the overdramatic swooning and kissy faces, refusing to let them ruin one of the best days of his life.
 We could let our friends crash in the living room
This is our place, we make the call
And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you
I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all
 The next three years were the most difficult and exhilarating years in Alex’s life. While his relationship with Willie grew wonderfully, along with the band’s success, his relationship with his parents fell apart. As soon as he graduated, he packed his bags and found the cheapest apartment he could. He took the first job that would hire him and tried to support himself as best he could. The Molinas offered to take him in but he didn’t want to burden them. The band suffered as they tried to find a way to rehearse around everyone’s work schedule. Alex could feel his life crumbling around him and he found it harder and harder to wake up every day.
But then there was Willie. He was the light in the darkness and the glue that kept him together. 
And when Willie suggested they move in together, Alex felt his heart stop. 
“I’ve been wanting to move out for awhile now and I already found a place that I can afford and it’s decent and I know this is like, a crazy huge step but --”
“Yes.”
The word flew from his lips before he allowed his brain to catch up, over think, and lose his nerve. The large smile that grew on Willie’s face was all the confirmation he needed that he made the right decision. 
Willie convinced Alex to quit his shitty job and convinced Caleb to let the band play at the Hollywood Ghost Club whenever they weren’t playing at other gigs. They were finally living the dream. Rehearsing and writing during the day and playing to large crowds almost every night. 
After their sets at the club, they would just linger around the building, mingling and making connections with the Hollywood elite that could afford to be there. Alex would watch Willie work, flitting from table to table and chatting up anyone who would look in his direction. It was amazing to watch him go from a dorky skater boy that couldn’t even finish a complete story without switching to a new topic, to a super charming and eloquent figure that never failed to convince a guest to give a very generous donation to the club. 
Alex was also pretty sure that half of the crowd was just as besotted with Willie as he was. But he knew he didn’t have to be jealous of anyone in the room. He knew he had Willie’s entire heart, just as Willie had his. And at the end of the night, he would be the one that would be holding Willie’s hand, and kissing Willie’s lips, and laying next to him in bed.
And if their friends got a little too drunk to drive home, he would be the one to help Willie carry them back to their apartment. He would be the one helping Willie rearrange the living room so that their friends had a place to sleep. He would be the one thanking him for being the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for. 
 Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever)
You're my, my, my, my
Lover
 Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?
With every guitar string scar on my hand
I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover
My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue
All's well that ends well to end up with you
Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover
And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me
And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover
  That same night, Alex was lying against Willie on the couch, playing with the skater’s rough, yet surprisingly soft fingers. Their friends were asleep, sprawled out everywhere on the living room floor, and Alex wished he could just freeze time and just stay in this moment forever. He was surrounded by his love and support and he couldn’t imagine anything better than this. Not until Willie whispered those words.
“Have you ever thought about marriage?” 
Alex sucked in a breath and his fingers were still against Willie’s. Had Alex thought about marriage? 
All the time.
Ever since they moved in together two years prior. But he always thought that it was too big of a thought; too obsessive. He didn’t want to scare Willie by moving too fast, even if they were just flashing ideas in his mind. He didn’t want Willie to leave him because he was too dependent, too attached to their relationship, too--
Alex realized how silent he had been and tried to scrounge up words so that Willie didn’t think he was freaked out, even if he kinda was.
But Willie didn’t seem to be bothered by Alex’s silence. Because Willie knew Alex so well. He knew exactly how Alex would react if he were to ask that kind of question. Willie continued, “I’ve thought about it a lot, recently. I’ve thought about us and this thing we’re doing. I don’t know all the details or anything, but I do know one thing for sure,” Willie paused and Alex looked up at him, waiting for the deep sentiment the boy was about to share. “Luke would definitely be the flower girl.”
This threw Alex into a fit of giggles and Willie’s smile was radiant. “I think Ruby would fight Luke for that position,” Alex said through his laughter.
At the mention of his sister, he sobered up. He had no doubt Ruby would absolutely want to be a part of his wedding; she would probably want to plan everything herself. He just hoped his parents would want to be there as well. Even if they didn’t agree with it, he’d hope they would at least care enough to see him happy. Thinking about how he would tell his parents and how they would react, his thoughts started to spiral once again.
It was as if Willie could sense his anxiety rising. He laced his fingers with Alex’s and squeezed reassuringly. 
Alex could feel Willie’s chest rumble as he spoke again. “We’re not gonna have a traditional wedding though. Those are too boring. Maybe we’ll do something crazy like have all the girls be groomsman and all the guys be bridesmaids. Or however it’ll work for us.” Alex didn’t really know either, but nodded in agreement. “And no traditional vows. We gotta get creative. Like, I dunno.  ‘I, Wilhelm Covington the Third,’”
“Willie, your first name isn’t Wilhem and you’re definitely not a ‘third,’” Alex chuckled, grinning up at his boyfriend.
“Shush, that’s what makes it creative. Now where was I? Oh yeah,
‘I, Wilhelm Covington the Third, with all the skateboard scars on my hand, take this magnetic force of a man,’” Willie paused, and Alex could practically see the smoke coming out of his ears as he tried to think of something funny. When that famous smirk crossed his features, Alex was ready to cringe. “‘I take this magnetic force of a man, Hotdog, to be my husband. Through cracked helmets and bad street dogs, and even when we’re ghosts.’”
Alex rolled his eyes but his smile only grew wider. He decided to play along, “and I promise to be super over-dramatic and constantly swooning over you.” 
“And you’ll save all your worst jokes for me. I want your lamest and dirtiest and cringiest jokes,” Willie added.
Alex nodded in agreement, trying to think of other funny vows. But the more he thought about it, the more everything was sinking in. Willie continued to ramble about silly vows and untraditional wedding things they could do. But all Alex could think about was the fact that Willie wanted to marry him. 
Willie wanted to marry him. 
He wanted to be Alex’s husband. He wanted to be Alex’s forever. No matter what life threw their way, Willie wanted to be by Alex’s side. He wanted to go everywhere and do everything with Alex. Through sickness, health, and everything in between. 
Alex looked back up at Willie and pushed himself up to interrupt his boyfriend with a gentle kiss to the lips. 
“Yes,” Alex whispered, his heart pounding and anxiety -- no, excitement -- filling his chest.
“Yes?”
“Yes, I’ll marry you.”
 Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever)
You're my, my, my, my
Oh, you're my, my, my, my
Darling, you're my, my, my, my
Lover
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sweetestlamb · 4 years ago
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Stronger Part 2 (Get Lost)
Summary: Mun-yeong makes amends with someone very special in her life and confronts someone she didn’t expect to see.
Notes: I cackle manically every time I write this story, it’s a problem LMAO. I’ll try to update at least once a week since it’s such short chapters and I have most of it planned in my head since I’ve been thinking about this forever.
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Sang-in finds her sobbing on the edge of the staircase, her whimpers painfully loud in the room, wet streaks pouring from her eyes. He simply takes her hand, she's limp in his arms it's clear he was expecting a fight, but she simply doesn't have anymore in her.
Like a small child she lets him pull her into her room and deposit her in the bed, cocooning her in the thick sheets and wiping her tears with a soft handkerchief he pulls from his pocket. He mumbles soft words of comfort to her, there there and it'll be okay, and she wants to lash out, yearns to thrash and scream that nothing will ever be okay. She's not okay.
However he'd seemed okay. Gang-tae. After a moment's pause it seemed he was fine to just walk out the door and leave her in the past. She'd been a small blip in the grand scheme of his life, a petulant child that wouldn't take his rejections and stabbing words for what they were, deterrents.
CAUTION:DO NOT ENTER.
But she'd thought herself special, what they had unusual, she'd opened up to him about things no one else has ever known. It seemed like he had done the same for her, secrets whispered in the dark of night.
With him she'd been different. Leaving herself open in ways she'd never imagined before and her greatest fear had been recognized, he had seen her core and smashed it to pieces only to return with empty words and promises.
I'm sorry.
Those were the words she longed to hear, but he never uttered them. Not once. And it appeared he never would, he would continue to push her away and pull her back when it was convenient for him. And she was expected to wait for his cue, an obedient dog that should accept abuse and callous words.
It was hard to pinpoint when he'd tamed her and made her so pathetic, but she had no intentions of remaining this way.
I will be better.
Stronger.
It takes day before she feels enough like herself before she leaves the bed, showering and arranging herself into some semblance of the person others have come to expect.
Hair perfectly combed and curled.
Deep wine dress with a high collar and ruffles.
Expensive towering heels, sharp enough to draw blood and a small bag worth more than rent.
Her heart is still broken but he hasn't called or text, further proving her point. She is expendable.
With a deep sigh and a final look in the mirror she leaves.
"Hello." She greets, head bowed in respect, feeling suddenly shy and not knowing what to do with this novel emotion.
Ju-ri's mother, Soon-duk smiles warmly at her before stepping aside to let her in. Her shoulder heats up from the motherly hand that leads in her.
"Come in, it's nice to see you. You look beautiful today."
She feels her cheeks pinken from the compliment, the woman is perpetually praising her and it's so uncommon that she finds herself basking in the warmth.
"To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit, are you looking for Ga--"
"No." The strength and conviction of her response causes the woman to step back as shock colors her face. She doesn't doesn't want to hear his name. She still isn't strong enough to do so without crumbling.
"I'm here to see Sang-tae. I want to apologize to him."
Soon-duk looks taken back before a wider smile fills her face, absently she wonders how the woman looked in her youth she's quite beautiful in her own regard. One day maybe she'll say those words aloud and watch her reaction.
"He only left his room yesterday, he's upstairs on the roof. He'll be happy to see you."
She silently hopes those words are true, she's never had a friend before, a true one that didn't run when things became hard or turned their back on you because others found you unusual. Sang-tae has come to mean a lot to her, someone who sees her and accepts her and challenges her. A true friend.
At first, he's reluctant to speak to her running and locking himself away, forcing her to speak to him through the bedroom window.
She explains herself in a language that they've both come to understand, fairy tales. A language she is fluent in and has used to share her deepest feelings with others.
Interprets the story of The Boy Who Cried Wolf, tells him of her impenetrable loneliness, she's been alone for so long but having a friend has shown her the beauty of letting others in, so much so the thought of going back to the way she lived sounds unimaginable and cruel.
There is silence, long and crawling after she's done speaking, she waits patiently staring at the moon.
Then finally he responds, "Are you lonely? Is that what the story means? Are you lonely Ko Mun-yeong?"
He never sugar-coats anything, never spares her feelings, that's what she's come to like about him. He's unapologetic and frank, just as she is with him treating him exactly how she treats others.
"You're not answering. If you want me to forgive you, you have to be sincere. If you're sincere then I will believe you otherwise you're just crying wolf."
She smiles humorlessly, to be so understood by one who has difficulties connecting to others is unsettling.
"Yes. I'm lonely. I miss you, I miss my best friend."
The sound of the window opening echoes and suddenly they are face to face, his brows drawn in consternation.
"You're telling the truth, your face doesn't look like you're lying."
She nods, "I am. I'm sorry I made you feel left out, I should have been honest with you. I promise I will be in the future."
He tilts his head cutely like a puppy before imploring, "Will you have fun with Gang-tae without me again? You can't have him."
The similar tinge of pain that implodes every time she hears his name detonates in her heart but she fights through it desperate to reconcile with Sang-tae.
"I won't. I just want to be your best friend again, he's yours; he's always been yours."
It hurts, like a throbbing wound that has reopened but she means it. Gang-tae was never truly hers, she was merely his mistress a dirty secret to hide away, temporary and it was time to accept that but she could still repair her relationship with Sang-tae, he made everything a little bit better. A dash of happiness.
Sang-tae looks surprised by her answer but he doesn't question her thankfully, instead rewarding her with a smile, it's tiny but it makes her heart grow three times larger.
Maybe all wasn't lost and she could fix the wrongs she'd made.
They make plans to see each other in two days, they need to work on their book, she has some ideas for a storyline. She's always written about her suffering, this time will be no different.
She hears him before she sees her, she screams at her body to move, flee but he flight or fight is broken, halted by his sudden unexpected appearance. She was told he was working overtime, news provided by Sang-in from Ju-ri.
Defying her information, he turns the corner with Jae-su and immediately like they are opposite magnets their eyes gravitate to each other. She watches him pause mid-laughter. His smile melting off his face as he watches her.
Jae-su babbles on unaware of his friends condition, slapping at his shoulder and guffawing at whatever hilarious story he'd been regaling before he too notices the eerie silence. When he notices her dark figure he jumps, hiding behind Gang-tae.
His reaction is enough to drag her from her stillness, her eyes dropping to the ground she makes her way to her car, keys jingling as she pulls them from her bag.
Behind her Gang-tae's deep voice rumbles as he speaks to Jae-su, his words are indecipherable. Taking deep breaths she quickens her movements, cursing herself as her key falls from her hand in her rush, clanking on the ground.
Before she can retrieve them, his hand fills her vision as he picks them up for her, sheepish grin on his face.
She takes the proffered keys from his hands, nodding in acknowledgment before opening the door and sliding into the seat. She goes to close the door when she feels resistance, she pulls harder but still the door refuses to close.
Glancing up she finds his hand on the door, prying it open his muscled hand flexing as he prevents the door from closing.
Finally lowering her hand, she turns to look at him. Staring at him with passive eyes, careful not to let anything slip through.
"You came to see me."
His words are a punch to the solar plexus, knocking the breath from her lungs.
Her brain short circuits and then turns back on, whirling at the audacity and confidence that oozes off him. He is failing immensely to keep a small grin off his face, eyes dancing as he looks at her eagerly.
She wants to punch it off his face.
"No. Why would I come to see you?"
His grin cracks.
"I tried to avoid you. I wanted to see Sang-tae and now that I have, I'll be going. Let go of my car."
His entire face crumbles like sand under a boot, his hand falls to his side as he gazes at her with soft pleading eyes. The amount of times those eyes are rendered her helpless makes her recoil in disgust.
"What's wrong with you? I don't understand why you're being like this! I tried to give you space but I don't get it, I opened up to you isn't that what you've been begging for!"
His anger cracks at her whip sharp, and all the rage deep beneath her surface bubbles up as she turns to glare at him.
"I want nothing to do with you. I'm sorry I ever met you, leave me alone. I will not be begging you for anything in the future." Reaching over to pick up the object she had stored in the backseat, she throws it harshly at him, it bounces off his chest.
"You can have Mang-tae, I don't need it anymore. Just like I don't need you. I only need Sang-tae. You got your wish I'll get lost, you do the same."
Satisfaction surges under her skin as she watches the hurt bloom on his face, his eyes open and expressive screaming at her but she slams up all her walls, she will not be weak any longer.
No fucking way.
Turning the key viciously in the ignition, the engine revs to life and he's forced to jump back to avoid losing his foot as she screeches off, smoke left in her wake.
She watches him getting smaller and smaller in the side mirror, before reversing.
A small hopeful glint flashes in his eyes, she immediately snuffs that out.
"I need my car back, you can give the keys to Sang-tae. "
The tires squeal as she peels out again, manic smile on her face as she laughs, elated at the look on his face. Finally she is the one abandoning him, the one to hurt and belittle. Her deep chuckles boom in the small space of the car as she drives back to her castle and its ominous silence.
Her lap is warm and wet from the tears that escape, she allows herself this final moment of anguish. These are the last tears she'll waste crying over him and their ill-fated romance.
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thatwriterkei · 5 years ago
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Dreaming of You.
°A/N; Sorry it's so long!! 😅❤️
•Summary: In which, Y/N invites the whole gang over to her place for a sleepover.
•Warnings: FLUFF, and some cursing as well
*MASTERLIST*
________________
Y/N's home wasn't the cleanest in the world. The place had a few documents and bills lying around that belonged to her parents, from the kitchen counters to the coffee table in the living room, but still clean as it was going to get. Her room though was a completely different story.
There were clothes strung along her dresser and windowsill, her comforter wrinkled and tossed around from waking up in a frenzy a couple of times; She slept through her alarms. It wasn't too trashy..Just covered in piles of dirty dishes she was too lazy to bring down to the kitchen sink. It's not her fault hot pockets are the most enjoyable meal while in bed...At 2 in the morning on a school night while you're trying to write a last minute English paper. It didn't matter though because today was the day she would finally spiff it up. Mainly because her friends would be arriving in two hours. That isn't a lot of time, huh?
After years and years of knowing MJ, Peter and Ned, not once did their sleepovers and late night study sessions occur in the comfort of her room. It didn't bother the group, but it was quite a surprise when Y/N offered to host a sleepover the following day.
Now it was Saturday and with all the homework she was given from her teachers, Y/N nearly forgot about the sleepover she arranged. Sure the snacks, drinks and movies were all set up and ready to go but definitely not the space they would be using.
She tossed the strayed dirty clothes into the nearby hamper, giving herself a mental note to start a wash the following day.
By the time it was six o'clock, her room was squeaky clean with a few appliances lingering around that was used to tidy the room. Once those were put away in the hallway closet, she heard a doorbell ring followed by some chatter near the front door that belonged to her mother's and a familiar female voice. Y/N peaked around from the hallway upstairs to see who it was and, sure enough, it was MJ. To be truthful, Y/N expected her to arrive on the dot so it wasn't too much of a shocker. She quickly ran down the stairs to greet the brunette.
"If it isn't Michelle Jones! Back again to torture me?" Y/N teased.
"The only thing I'm going to torture you with tonight is confessing to Peter and how you like him sooo much." The corners of MJ's lips curved into a small cocky smirk.
Thoroughly embarrassed, Y/N punched the girl's upper arm with such feebleness it almost tickled.
"Hey, don't say that too loudly! My parents could hear and, my god, I don't need more people teasing me about how obvilous my crush is on him. Even I'm surprised he hasn't found out!"
While she spoke, the pair walked upstairs to Y/N's sparkling room.
"I mean he's stupid for not realizing it but you're also dumb for not confessing so, really it's on you. Just tell him when he comes over tonight, easy as that."
Y/N slumped on her freshly made bed with a soft groan. "There's no way in hell I'm doing that! I swear, sometimes you just want to see me suffer."
"I wouldn't say suffer..More like, tolerating situations with consequences."
She lifted her head with a raised eyebrow, "That's basically the same thing!"
After chatting for another 15 minutes about random topics that came up, the doorbell rang again. Soon enough, her mother sent up the two excited boys. Ned bursted into Y/N's room without knocking while Peter looked around eagerly. No, this wasn't the first time he entered a girl's room but it would be funny if it was.
"Geez, ever heard of knocking?" MJ commented, her previous smile being replaced with a slightly annoyed look.
"Yes, but I didn't think it was necessary." Ned quickly retorted, taking a seat at one of the two bean bags Y/N had in her room. MJ was sitting in the other one.
"You mind if I sit here?"
It seemed as though Peter was the only polite one in this scenario.
Y/N's cheeks flushed to a red shade and her heart skipped a beat. She felt her heart rate quickening each moment that passed while their eyes stayed connected.
"Of course I don't mind, silly! Sit back and relax, you're on Y/N's property now. No worries for anybody, except me. Speaking of which, I'll get those pizza rolls in the oven! MJ, come with me please?" The look in her eyes showed that MJ didn't have a choice to come with Y/N or not.
The two girls left without another word spoken, only the sound of footsteps running down the stairs as they made their way to the empty kitchen.
Her parents stayed in their room for the time being, watching god knows what but they sure spent most of their time in there. Y/N didn't want to think about it though. She was freaking out way too much about how innocent and cute the look on Peter's face was when he asked her.
"Oh my god, did you see him? His eyes, they were so freaking adorable! And his smile, I swear it's brighter than a full moon."
MJ quirked an eyebrow. "And I swear you're about to give me a headache with all this mushy gushy romance stuff."
Y/N grabbed the bag of pizza roles from the freezer while MJ pulled out a silver tray.
"Oh c'mon, you can't internally gag at that. Did you not see how he was the only polite one? Clearly he's nicer than you and Ned."
"And yet, who do you share your utmost dreams and fantasies about him with?" MJ's lips formed a smirk again.
"My diary." Y/N replied with a deadpanned expression on her face.
Meanwhile, Ned was nearly doubling over in laughter after the girls left. Peter was panicking just a little bit.
"Shit, did I say something wrong? I just made a fool of myself, didn't I?"
Ned eventually caught his breath from laughing so passionately. "Oh my god. Stop being so dramatic and man up. She was probably just gushing over you because you're literally on her bed! Do you know how close you two are? You're practically dating already."
Peter rolled his eyes. "Be quiet, or she might hear you! Besides, I highly doubt she holds any real deep feelings for me. I'm going to be in the friend zone forever, Ned."
He flopped back on the bed, a dreamy sigh escaping his lips.
"I just want to tell her how much I like her, but she deserves to be loved by somebody who is dashing, compassionate, and compliments her beauty. Somebody who is able to spoil the hell out of her because she just deserves it. I'm not saying that I couldn't fulfill that role but she most likely isn't interested in-"
MJ walked through the door, trying to stifle a small chuckle after overhearing part of the conversation. "And who isn't interested in whom?"
"Huh? What're we talking about?" Y/N arrived momentarily after, holding two plate fulls of fresh, piping hot pizza rolls.
"Nothing, nothing!! Yum, pizza rolls! Thanks Madame Y/N!" Peter steered the conversation away and shoved a roll into his mouth. He immediately regretted it.
It took everything in Y/N's power to not drop the plates. "Oh my god, Peter!! You dumb dumb, it just came out of the oven!"
She set them down on the bed beside Peter, shaking her head disappointedly at the pouting male. "Do you want some ice cream? It's a little too early to have some since the movies haven't started but I can get you a drink instead?"
Then one thing after another happened and the group finally settled with MJ and Ned on the comfy dark bags and the adorable lovebirds on Y/N's bed. The group of friends were currently engrossed in Shrek with the occasional laughter filled the room.
Y/N was the only one beginning to doze off. Her body desperately yearned for something cozy to snuggle into. The closest thing to her was none other than Peter.
Peter felt the weight of Y/N's head land on his right shoulder and her arms snake around his torso. This wouldn't be the first time they bundled together, but the fluttery feeling they got in their chests didn't go unnoticed by their intertwined hearts.
Peter shifted in his position to lay both of them down. The bed creaked a little but, luckily, Y/N didn't awaken. He inhaled some, her faint perfume making its way through his nostrils. To Peter, Y/N felt like home. A place where he didn't feel judgement, only kindness and support. He enjoyed her presence, and as did she with him.
By the time the movie had ended, the two had fallen asleep with their legs tangled together. MJ and Ned noticed this, and boy did they go crazy with photos. Eventually, they went to bed as well after MJ went in search for some blankets and pillows.
At around five in the morning, Y/N quietly murmured in her sleep. "Mm..Peter..No..Don't leave..I need some more...Cuddles. Please? Thank you."
Peter began to wake up due to her soft chatter, but he vaguely remembered hearing her say his name.
"Huh? What was that, Y/N/N?" He asked in a drowsy tone. The bed dipped a little when Peter attempted to pull back from her tight grasp around his waist.
"Stop moving, Pete." She grumbled, snuggling herself closer to his chest.
He chuckled at her protests, grazing his thumb against her soft cheeks. "Sorry.. What're you dreaming about?"
"Dreaming of you.." Y/N mumbled.
"Y-You are?" He hesitated, "You know..I really like you. I'm not sure how to explain my feelings for you, but I do know that you're incredibly beautiful inside and out. And the goofy smile you always have own your face is just adorable. You care for everybody, and I admire that. I deeply admire you.."
Y/N lifted her head, staring up at the curly haired boy in awe. "You like me?"
"Shit, I thought you were dreaming about me!"
"What?! How did you know?"
MJ's voice cut through their conversation. "Will you two go back to sleeping and cuddling each other? Sheesh."
Now recovering from her drowsy state, Y/N's cheeks turned to a faint rosy shade. "I really like you too.."
"I'm so glad. I was about to lose my mind.." He chuckled a little, pressing a chaste kiss to her cheek.
The two returned to resting, now especially easier; With their heart beats in sync and souls intertwined.
________________
@peterspideyy @har-rison-s @peeterparkr @parkershoodie @givelove-always @waitimcomingtoo @dedeimagines @that-one-eggo-child
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anika-ann · 5 years ago
Text
Grease and Pearls - Pt.3
Dreams Meet Reality
Type: One-shot turned three-shot (because does anyone really want a 17k in one go?)
Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader (main), Tony/Reader, Tony/Pepper
Word count: 3400 or 5100 (yeah, you read it right, see A/N)
Summary: An uptown girl met a downtown guy with a heart of gold. Oh, and he was handsome too. It inevitably leads to their relationship developping… but is there any chance for them at all?
For @cxptain​​ ’s challenge. Prompt: Uptown Girl by Billy Joel
Warnings: swearing (a lot), attempt at angst, ghosting, communication par excellence
A/N: We had fluff and smut. What are we missing? That’s right. Heads up, people! There is an alternate ending to my original one, the one sentence where it breaks is in italics. I hope that makes sense ;) Pick whichever or read both :D Enjoy!
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Story Masterlist
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It was bound to happen – you knew as much – but deep in your heart, you had hoped it wouldn’t. You had hoped it would last longer. You had hoped that perhaps a miracle would occur and in some mysterious way, you would be able to convince your parents that marrying you to Anthony was a terrible idea.
You should have known better than that.
The very day you had fell asleep in Steve’s arms after making love – and God, you could still feel him, his touches on your skin, his mouth, everywhere, even in the most intimate places, a pleasant, almost ceremonial ache lingering exactly there, a memory of fire in your belly and your heart – you got caught.
Your parents had been waiting at Potts’ house as you reached it around eleven in the evening, a smiling mess, a sight to behold, and any illusion about the future you had been painting in your mind shattered.
Pepper had tried to take part of the blame, but your parents always believed that you were the faulty daughter in your household and such ways stretched outside your house.
Your father was furious. Your mother was deeply disappointed and even faked a few tears – or perhaps she shed them for real, mourning her reputation, one the family would fight tooth and nail to retain.    
You had literally fallen on your knees and begged when they found a drawing from a street artist, a souvenir of one of your trips to downtown which you had only craved to explore-- and by some miracle indeed, you were allowed to keep it and not to have it torn to shreds right in front of your eyes. Pepper’s teary gaze told you she knew you were making up things up as you went and that the drawing, the one that captured beauty you weren’t sure you possessed, meant much more.
You couldn’t even hope to earn forgiveness, so you only asked for it half-heartedly.
What you did earn was a damn chaperon.
In your age! In this day and age!
Her name was Maria and she was truly efficient and strict to a fault. Nevertheless, she respected your privacy and whenever you were to meet Pepper, she would stand just outside the door and wait if you asked for a confidential conversation… which was always, you didn’t need some goddamned stranger spying on you. What the hell.
But truly, all things considered, you had lucked out; as your parents didn’t fault Pepper for your actions, you were still allowed to meet with her at least and to talk her in private.
However, the marriage plans were sped up.
And naturally, you couldn’t even hope to set your foot anywhere near downtown. You hadn’t seen Steve for two weeks, you hadn’t even found his number in the phone book to explain yourself and you missed him.
Your heart seemed to fail in its basic function; when you were lying in your bed at night, wide awake, it longed after ocean blue eyes with a drop of green, strong hands holding you close, and it wouldn’t stop pounding wildly in your chest. In the morning, your heart appeared to be beating so slowly you had to place your palm over the area to make sure it was still there, that it still had enough strength to keep you upright all day ahead.
And it ached 24 hours a day. For you, for Steve, who must have been clueless on why you never showed up to your set date or any time after. You were hurting and your parents watched you suffer along with your sister, frowning at you and scolding you to stop acting like a five-year old who had a toy taken away.
They could never understand. Was that a curse or a blessing?
Pepper was the only person you could trust, only person you could talk to about your true sorrows and her patience never seemed to wear thin despite her own turmoil – after all, if your marriage was to be sped up… her hopes were being crushed as well.
“Pepper… I don’t want to marry Tony. God, I can’t marry him,” you whispered, a cup of tea in your hands, your palms and fingers curled around the warm ceramics, hoping for it to take away some of the ever-present cold your body radiated these days.
Your friend smiled at you sadly, an honest and heart-breaking lift of the corners of her lips.
“I know, honey.”
You chuckled bitterly at the irony. Here you were, stealing her dreamed man, on she loved, while yearning after another, after the one you loved. You looked up at the ceiling, blinking away the tears gathering in your eyes – again and again, barely a day without their presence. They were always there, ready for the dam to broke so they could run down your cheeks.
When you spoke again, you could barely force the words out of your tight throat.
“I… I truly love Steve. I dreamed tonight, about having a little boy,” you whispered, the image still vivid behind your now closed eyelids. He was so damn pretty, your sweet little boy. “Blond hair, pretty blue eyes full of mischief and such innocent smile with a front tooth missing and I was expecting with another--… I want that. I want to have Steve’s children one day and I want Steve. I need him. It feels like I can’t breathe without him.”
Tender hands reached for your shoulders and pulled you into an embrace, soft and careful, yet very unladylike, not proper for anyone to see in public – at least not here, not in uptown. God, you hated it here. You despised it now, truly. And if that made you an ungrateful brat, then so be it.
“Oh sweety, I know exactly how you feel. I’m so sorry,” Pepper replied in the same manner, comfortingly stroking your arm. She sounded on the verge of tears as well. “But you know what your family is like, they would never accept Steve. As much as it hurts you and me… I’m not sure you really have a choice.”
You swallowed against the lump formed in your throat and shakily breathed in.  
“Don’t I?”
You thought of your chaperon and wondered… just how heartless could she be?
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It was three weeks after his girl’s last surprise visit that had somehow resulted in her and Steve tangled in his sheets when he lost his faith in her and whatever the two of them had had completely.
Three weeks without as much as a glimpse of her or a word, two weeks of not going to bed without few bottles of beer to keep him company, Steve walked into the shop and instantly knew something was wrong.
The usually loud environment full of chatter and teasing was suspiciously quiet.
“Hey guys,” he called out, trying to sound casual. “What gives?”
“Nothing-“ Thor responded swiftly – and way too quickly. Steve rolled his eyes.
“I’m blond but ain’t that stupid. Who pissed in everyone’s cereal? Buck?”
Steve’s best friend looked up from his work, shorty meeting his eyes. The regretful gaze spoke volumes on its own, but the brunet still sighed, tossing the rag in his hands on the nearest hood.
Steve suddenly wasn’t so sure he wanted to hear the news whatever it was. Dread filled his stomach, a feeling that had his gut twist uncomfortably. The blue-grey irises of his friend hid behind his eyelids.
“I… I’ve been in town this morning, Steve,” he explained slowly, cursing under his breath when he took in Steve’s perfectly confused expression, awaiting a metaphorical punch. “Fuck, Steve—I-eh, I saw Carter with Stark and they were-“ The coil in Steve’s stomach tightened to the point of him thinking he might throw up. “-shit, I’m sorry, Steve, they were at jeweller’s, probably picking up a ring.”
A ring.
Right.
Because she was getting married. To Stark. He knew that—he had been, in fact, informed that it might happen at some point.
But no-- like a fool, he had painted an image in his head, stupid and naïve and even found himself thinking about his ma’s engagement ring – once or twice since he had met his stunning uptown girl –, one he had inherited and was planning to give a woman who would take his heart.
Funny how his mind had been purposely leaving out the fact that the very same woman he had given his heart to was the one who could stomp on it and let it bleed on the pavement.
Fuck, he was a complete idiot, wasn’t he?
Steve swallowed against his suddenly dry throat, nodding few times in acknowledgement of the information, lips in a tight line, one corner lifted in an ironic smile as his blood boiled.
“Well… we knew it was comin’, didn’t we?” he remarked and shook his head with a scoff.
God, he was so fucking stupid-
“Steve-“
He waved Bucky off, stalking towards his own station. He dropped his bag, always stashed with clean clothes just in case, to the ground by the counter, hand blindly reaching out. He grabbed the wrench on the top unmistakably, his fingers curling firmly around the metal.
One swift movement, one jerk of his bulging arm and the wrench was sent flying, hitting the momentarily empty chain with an ominous clang that could only hope to echo the mad rage he felt, sizzling in his veins, eating him up from the inside.
“Fuck him!” he roared, the ferocity of his voice startling even his mates who were familiar with his occasional temper.
His breathing turned heavy as he reached for another tool, flinging it the same way, this time hitting the wall, much to his irritation.
Jesus fucking shit-- he was so fucking mad – at her, at himself, at Stark, Stark who thought he could just take and take, greedy asshole, just like all of those uptown snobs that thought they owned the fucking world!  
“Fuck Stark and all of those privileged assholes! I hope they rot in- Fucking! Hell!”
Two more objects Steve didn’t bother to look at flied through the air and hit the chains, the harmless violence not providing him with half the satisfaction he hoped in.
By the time the boss stalked into the shop the check on what was going on – and to yell at his employees to stop fucking around – Steve had been long gone, taking the SHILED bike and driving away until all he could feel was the wind swishing around his head, loud enough to drown out his noisy thoughts.
“Rogers came in sick, we sent him home,” Pietro supplied helpfully, the deadpan expression on Fury’s face telling him that he had none of that shit.
Yet, the bossman sighed and headed back to his office.
“Good, wouldn’t want him to puke all over my fuckin’ garage.”
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She showed up in the shop on week four. Steve was just coming back from a short bathroom break, quickly taking a U-turn when he got a glimpse of her in the overhead door to the garage, wearing black and red elegant dress.
He leaned his back against the separating wall, closing his eyes at the painful jab to his stomach.
Logically, there was no reason for him to be so devastated. He fucked girls before—he liked girls before. So why did he have to be such a missy when it came to her? She was pretty, sure, but there were plenty of cute gals. Steve really tried not to think about the L word they had exchanged, because deep down it had dawned to him a while ago; he was so fucked up because he was in love and then he was dumped by a lady who normally wouldn’t look at him twice, which was something that his brain had been bullheadedly refusing to accept.
“Sorry, he ain’t in today,” Odinson drawled, traces of hostility in his voice.
“Oh,” she sounded surprised and he could picture the gentle confused frown, the slight pout to her lips—shit, those lips tasted like cherry-- "Uhm, do you know when he will be in?”
“Why do ya’ need to know?”
Steve was certain that her frown deepened at Bucky’s words.
“Well, uhm, I need to talk to him, it’s important. Should I come here in few days or-“
“Don’t think he’ll be ‘round here any time soon.”
“Is he alright?” she asked, genuine concern in her voice and it took all of Steve’s willpower not to bang his head against the wall.
Why, just why was she doing this to him? Why would she care?
Now he knew that was cruel to her – he believed that once, she had truly been interested in him – but he told himself multiple times that her looks were deceiving, that she only had been looking for a distraction from her uptight uptown world. Maybe if he told himself enough times, he would start to believe it.
“Ain’t none of your business, princess,” Thor retorted and Steve just knew she winced at the harsh tone, a soft gasp escaping her mouth, that sweet mouth he had  kissed over three weeks ago, sweet, innocent and sinful, the music of her short breaths filling his poor excuse of a loft, keeping him fucking going.
“Nice ring, by the way,” Bucky said nonchalantly.
Steve gulped at that. Yeah, he bet it was; but there was no way Bucky was being polite. The venom dripping from his words was a message on its own.
And she picked up on it, naturally. His –not his anymore, not that she had ever truly been – brilliant beautiful girl.
“Oh. Thank- thank you,” she whispered and Steve had to strain his ears like a creep, catching the crack in her voice; he almost ran out hearing it, ready to comfort her, because God, he couldn’t imagine her crying, salt tears rolling down her rosy cheeks - few had when they had made love, but she had been smiling too.
He was sure that seeing her cry without that smile… it would feel the world was ending. Her eyes were made for shining with happiness, her lips made for laughter-
“The fuck-?“
Steve’s head snapped straight when he heard his boss leaving his office, catching him chilling by the wall, very much not working and instead trying not to break and kiss the woman he loved stupid – no matter how stupid that made him. She was engaged. Promised to another, a much classier man… or at least much richer, Steve didn’t imagine his character being worth a damn penny.
On instinct, Steve put a finger over his own lips, wordlessly begging Fury not to rat him out. The man rolled his good eye – the one that hadn’t been hit by hot oil years ago – and crossed his arms on his chest.
“And—uhm, I see. Tell—please tell him I stopped by if he- and that I am sorry for not coming here for so long. He can leave a message with Mrs.Maximoff if he--- tell him I really need to-- that I would like to talk to him,” her voice trembled a bit as she stuttered, but it was clear she had been aiming for a firmer voice and missed by miles.
“Don’t see why he should want to know, princess, but sure, whatever.”
Fury gave Steve another annoyed look and stalked into everyone’s sight. For a second, Steve panicked – was his boss about to tell on him? – but the bulky man only walked in, a professional greeting on his lips.
“Good afternoon, madam. What can we do for you today?”
“Oh, good afternoon, sir-“
“My name is Nicolas Fury, I own the SHIELD Car Repairs. May I be of service?” he continued pleasantly, a businessman in his heart. And actor in his soul, apparently, because Steve was sure he figured out what was going on from the few words he had heard and from Steve’s cowardice and was now putting up a face.
“Mr.Fury, thank you for your readiness, however I was only just leaving. Your staff was most helpful,” she said, polite and respectful, almost a hint of a kind smile in her tone as if she hadn’t sounded on verge of tears only a moment ago. As if the guys hadn’t been jerks to her, standing up for him and his… ugh, his hurt feelings.
“Very well then. Have a pleasant day. Should I walk you out?”
“I actually already offered to walk Ms. Carter out if that’s alright with ya’,” Pietro quickly stepped in, a voice that hadn’t spoken since she had arrived.
“Thank you for choosing SHIELD Car Repairs, Ms.Carter,” Fury’s voice echoed through the shop, complete silence following for what felt like an eternity.
Steve gulped, knowing all too well Fury was waiting for him to come out of his hiding spot.
And sure enough – the boss’ eye found him the moment he returned. “Mr.Fury-“
“For fuck’s sake, Rogers, don’t pull shit like ‘dat in my shop. And all of ya’ – less chatting, less big-mouthing customers and for fuck’s sake, don’t go jerk into the bathroom now just because a girl in skirt showed up. Get your head in the game… and don’t drop anything on your fucking toes, accidents on a workplace are shit to deal with.”
Steve nodded with fervour, going back to his station, even when he couldn’t say that his head was in the game. No, his head was miles away, with beautiful pouty lips, the sweetest smile and a body to write sonnets for.
When Pietro came back, he didn’t say a word, but Steve could feel him burning a hole in his head with how much he stared.
That night, Steve switched from beer to whiskey, just once, hoping to drown out the sorrow that consumed him at simply hearing her voice.
Two months later, two months of Steve avoiding Maximoff’s diner like a plague and dodging Pietro Maximoff’s attempts to have a minute alone with him, a Good Samaritan left a newspaper on Steve’s doorstep. Steve, utterly confused and bone-tired from the long day at work, lifted it and started flicking through the pages absentmindedly as he went inside of his apartment.
And there, right among the obituaries, were marriage announcements, one single photo from a wedding.
She was stunning in her dress, the fabric appearing as delicate and soft as her skin when Steve had felt it under his rough fingers the day she had asked him to make love to her. A smile, crooked and melancholic, played on Steve’s lips at the memory, her breathless moans echoing in his ears.
In the photo posed a beautiful bride with her husband; and yet, Steve couldn’t make himself think she looked as pretty as she had been when sitting on his bed, misplaced, breath-taking and tempting, as pretty as she had been in the moments of ecstasy he had brought her with his loving; for the first time and for the last time at once.
He abandoned the paper on the counter and poured himself a glass of whiskey, bringing it up, hesitating an inch from his lips.
Eyeing the amber liquid, stirring it in the glass, he recalled a movie he had been to with Buck a long time ago. He had never seen people do it in real life, they certainly hadn’t done that at his ma’s funeral, but it would feel symbolic perhaps; the action of pouring a drink into a freshly dug grave was as outside his reality as the foolish idea of a relationship with her, after all.
Taking the newspaper to his hand once more, straightening the picture, he let himself feast his eyes on her. She was radiant, like sun, like the damn sunflowers on her dress the day he had met her.
Shaking his head, he threw the paper to the trash, picture up. Pouring half the whiskey on it, he buried the bittersweet memory of his untouchable uptown girl;downing the rest, he ignored the burn in his eyes and focused on the one in his throat.
As much as he hated himself for it, his last thought before he fell asleep that night was of her, a minute of wonder if she had ever truly been as affected as he was, at least for a moment; he lulled himself to sleep hoping that perhaps she had.
He dreamed of reaching out to Mrs.Maximoff as she had asked the guys to tell him to do. He dreamed of her being there the next time he came in, with an inviting and yet sad smile, a big-ass diamond on her finger… her cherry-flavoured kiss of goodbye lingering on his lips when he opened his eyes to a new day.
He took the trash out that very morning, adding a half-finished sketch he torn away from his book.
It was the last time he saw her.
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Thank you for reading! Scroll to the end of the fic for notes. ….Or? ;)
◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦ Alternate ending ◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦◦
That night, Steve switched from beer to whiskey, just once, hoping to drown out the sorrow that consumed him at simply hearing her voice.
In the night of week four turning to week five, Steve’s eyes snapped open to the darkness of his apartment. Momentarily confused, not remembering a nightmare or anything that would cause him to wake up so abruptly, he groaned when he reached for the alarm clock on his nightstand only to find out it was half past one.
He woke up for no fucking reason barely two hours after he went to bed.  
Furious knocks on his door made him jolt, his irritation only growing.
Not without a reason then – some fucker was-- ugh. People were fucking assholes. He was not getting up from his bed for sure.
“Fuck off,” Steve muttered, lying back down face first, determined to ignore-
His door rattled with the force of the next series of knocks and he growled, scrambling to his feet, shuffling to the door and wiping the sleep from his eyes.
“C’min’, comin’, Jesus, fuck.”
Unlocking and opening the door for a slit, Steve stared at the face of his night visitor, absolutely baffled.
“The fuck, Pietro? Do ya’ know wad time ‘zit?”
“No. Do ya’?” the blond retorted, his voice dripping sarcasm and Steve really wanted to shut the door to his face. It was too early – or late – for Steve to deal with that bullshit. “Pack your bags, Rogers, Natasha has a free room.”
Steve briefly wondered when the fuck the world stopped making any goddamn sense, but opened the door fully for his clearly delusional friend. For all Steve knew, Pietro could be having a stroke, he’d better hear him out.
“Huh?” he hummed, his palms massaging his bloodshot eyes. “Da’ fuck are ya’ talkin’ ‘bout?”
“Natasha? My cousin? Remember her?”
Why the hell was Pietro acting as if it was completely normal to stop by a guy’s loft to talk about his cousin, one Steve hadn’t even met?
Steve sighed, humouring the other man. “Yeah? Married some… general or somethin’? What’s ‘dat-”  
“Colonel, yeah. She’s the one who lives in Baltimore. She got a room for ya’,” Pietro repeated, still not making an ounce of sense.
“The fuck’d I do in Baltimore?” Steve asked tiredly, earning a look that told him that it was fucking obvious. Which it wasn’t really, not to him.
…was this a fever dream?
“Open your own shop, dumbass, or find a spot in some. Make money for that pretty gal of yours and that little cute as fuck babies you’ll make.”
Steve’s heart dropped to his stomach at the mention of you, fully prepared to rip Pietro a new one to wake him in the middle of the night to fuck with him—but  he caught a movement to Pietro’s right from a corner of his eye and his heart leaped right back, suddenly sprinting.
This was most definitely a fever dream. Steve felt his jaw drop, his eyes fixing on the vision in front of him as he entirely tuned out Pietro’s next words.
“She must like you real big if she’s willin’ to sell her family nick-nack to look at your ugly mug every day. And skip town and shit…”
And a vision his beautiful uptown girl was, a mirage his mind must have come up, because there was no way she was standing there, sheepish as always, but instead of her dress, wearing a pair of jeans and a simple red blouse, a denim jacket unbuttoned, hanging loosely over her shoulders. Her hair was in a messy ponytail, threw over her left shoulder.  
And shit, she talked too, which made it appear this was in fact real.
“Good evening, Steve. I am sorry to wake you,” she whispered, leaving him stare at her blankly, dumbstruck, breath stuck in his chest.
“I’ll drive ya’, Dr.Strange’s car needs a test ride. Fury’s payin’ for the gas, by the way, the ol’ bastard,” Pietro continued as Steve managed to only watch the woman he had been missing for the past weeks lower her gaze, her teeth anxiously biting on her lower lip, fingers toying with the edges of her jacket. Hers? “I’ll be back by tomorrow afternoon, even have an hour or two to spare. That’s if you start packin’ now, bud.”
The mention of packing snapped Steve from his trance, all the emotions hitting him like a damn truck. Anger, longing, more confusion, restlessness as his girl was standing only few feet away from him and he couldn’t take it anymore.
He took a hesitant step towards her, ignoring the smirking man clearing his path.
“What—what are ya’ doin’ here?” Steve asked incredulously, his inner turmoil reflecting in his voice. She hadn’t showed up for weeks and now-- what exactly was she doing here? “You- you’re engaged-”
Gulping, she looked up, her eyes glistening with unshed tears; yet, a hint of a smile spread on her lips as she shifted her weight from one foot to another. For the first time, Steve also noticed her shoes, a simple pair of sneakers looking bizarre on her feet.
“To a man who loves my best friend and vice versa, my best friend who has been covering for me whenever we were together before it blew to our faces,” she explained, not daring to raise her voice above whisper. Steve still didn’t understand – not fully, unable to comprehend what was happing on his doorstep. Pietro talking about his cousin, about driving, Fury paying for gas, the woman he still loved standing there as if ready to skip town- “She was too covering for me when I talked to Mrs. Maximoff when she helped me to plan this. Pietro said you would want this as well— but- but if you don’t, I will leave you alone. I-“
The day Steve had met the strange girl from uptown, Bucky hadn’t failed to mention Pietro was the fast one, clearly implying Steve was the slow one.
Bucky should have fucking seen Steve now when she hesitated, unsure of his feelings – he had never acted so fast in his whole damn life.
He crossed the distance in one long stride and his hands shot up to her, grabbing her by her shoulders unceremonially. Before she could react, he pulled her body against his with all he got, claiming her mouth like there was no tomorrow.
He swallowed her yelp of surprise, followed by her happy laugh, feeling tears springing from her eyes, causing him to halt just as she finally started kissing him back.
“But your family-“ he blurted out, interrupted by her shaking her head wildly, hair flying.
“Mr. Ross has an eye on my sister. He is from a good family, of good name, generations of lawyers. My family will do splendidly,” she said with a smile playing on her lips, sweet and watery as tears still rolled down her face – happy ones, Steve believed. He felt the same delight bursting in him, switching from a broody cynic back to the fool in love in no time. “And we might too. We will have each other and I have learned enough to teach—or-- or I can be a waitress if I can’t find another job, it doesn’t matter, just so you are not the only one to-“
God, he loved her. She was so adorable and sweet and was talking about being his and going from basically a modern princess to a damn waitress, because she was willing to be with him whatever the fucking cost, apparently--
And was there really anything else he could do?
He grabbed the back of her neck to connect their mouths again, a hungry open-mouthed kiss, his hand fisting in her hair, because holy fuck, how was this happening, she was here and she was his-
“Alright, alright, smoochin’ later, packin’ your friggin’ bags now, Rogers,” Pietro cleared his throat loudly, sounding only as annoyed as amused. “I have a long drive ahead.”
Later, bags hazardously full and piled up in the trunk and on the backseat next to them, Steve couldn’t stop smiling and yet he felt a pang of guilt, ruminating over everything she was giving up.
She was resting her head on his shoulder, their interlaced fingers in his lap and Steve revelled at the absence of an overpriced engagement ring on her hand, the one from his ma’s securely in one of his bags to take place on her finger one day. She was walking the fine line between the real world and the dreamland, breathing softly to the crook of his neck and she seemed content. For now.
He sighed and pressed what could be the hundredth kiss to her hair that night.
“Doll?” he whispered softly, the question burning on his tongue, the only one he could hope to actually have answered now and not after they would try and started a life together.
“Mm?” she hummed softly, nuzzling into him further, her lips brushing the exposed skin on his throat.
“Why me? You could have any of those-“ snobs “-high-class… uptown guys.”
The smile he felt against his skin had him melt into the seat as he chased away all the grim thoughts about what the future might bring, her regretting her decision and blaming him for her ruined life on top of that list.
“Because I love you, Steve, and you are worth ten of them. My amazing downtown guy,” she emphasized, filling Steve’s chest with the most delicious warmth, his heart swelling, feeling so full it might burst.
He knew she wasn’t just saying that – she meant it. If she hadn’t, she wouldn’t’ have been in his arms right now, heading to damn Baltimore with nothing but her bags, little money and few pieces of jewellery.
“I love ya’ too,” he whispered, this time pressing a kiss to her nose, drawing an exhausted giggle from her lips. Yep, his heart was about to burst before they even reached their destination. “Love ya’ so much. My sweet, sweet uptown girl.”
“Not so uptown anymore...”
Steve chuckled as rather than regret, her voice was filled with relief. “I’m willin’ to put up with ‘dat as long as ya’ stay mine.”
She squeezed his hand, tilting her head up, blinking up at him sleepily and softly pressing her lips to his.
“I think that can be arranged.”
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S.R. masterlist
cxptain’s challenge (check it out, prompts are still available - and who doesn’t like the 80′s?)
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Tags:
@wxstedhexrt, @comicshoplife, @elysianecho, @scentedsongrebel, @orions-nebula, @pies-writes-and-more​, @kayteewritessteve​, @murdermornings, @rinkashirikitateku, @queen-kass-the-writer
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….yes, in the first ending, there might have been a chance of our uptown girl planning an escape and Steve aka heartbroken dummy blew it. But hey, maybe not, perhaps she only wanted to say goodbye like he dreamed of… who knows. 
Aaaaanyway.
You are my hero if you finished reading this fic! Thank you so much for finding time to do that, this one truly was a beast – at least when I consider that it WAS supposed to be a one shot. 
Any feedback is appreciated, as always – good, bad (if constructive), coherent or incoherent, or ‘just’ a like if you enjoyed and don’t feel like putting feelings into words. Thanks again for reading!
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theloyaltyofthewolves · 4 years ago
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recently the mood has just been no thoughts, head empty; just soft SKZ Virgo boys~
okay okay okay. okayokayokay. let’s talk about the virgos. (this is going to be a long post, so go make yourselves some popcorn or tea or white wine or somethin because i have been wanting to write this from the moment i started this blog and this bitch is long.)
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it’s a little impressive, honestly, to have a group of eight people consist of three virgos. considering it’s one of the most underappreciated signs in the zodiac, that’s a lot of earth sign, and that’s a lot of virgo. but i think the interesting thing about the virgos in stray kids is that they are all different versions of the same sign. like one of those pokemon whose evolution is the same creature, just with a different coat color. they play so perfectly off and into each other. it very much feels as if it was meant to be. 
let’s start with the baby.
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seungmin is almost a cusp. he’s right on the border of libra and virgo, which means he inherited a little bit of both. cusps are often pretty conflicted people, but i think seungmin wears it well. he’s got the steadiness of a virgo—his feet are planted firmly in the soil. he’s got the motivation of a virgo, that self-discipline that verges on cruel. listening to the paranoid ways that he cares for his voice—no a/c, only masks, no shouting—that’s that virgo neurosis. he’s the controlled virgo, the perfectly-aligned virgo. the stereotypical virgo. good with money, level-headed in an argument, prone to fits of contained anger if things don’t go his way or he experiences unanticipated setbacks. he’s the impatient, exasperated, long-suffering virgo mom friend. tough love, rough love. brutal honesty and uncensored opinions. getting his teammates out of bed and into the van, forcing vitamins down their throats, throwing sunscreen at their backs and water bottles at their heads because god fucking damnit, can’t they take care of themselves for once? the advice-giver, the maknae with a head full of barbed wisdom. he’s the knows better kid, because he does. seungmin knows better. he knows what to do, so he’s the one they call. night or day. i’ve messed up, i think i really messed up this time. and he’ll talk them off a ledge, go to the only all-night grocery store, buy some ice cream and some gummy vitamins. show up at jisung’s door and say take a deep breath. you’re going to be okay, peabrain. grow up a little. sharp and a little bit caustic, but his friends have learned that the sting usually means he’s right.  
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and within that rough love, there are moments of unthinkable sweetness. holding hands under the table to calm nerves at radio interviews, pressure on the back of a neck to hold back a panic attack at an airport, warm arms under the covers the night before a concert. the ability to bring such profound comfort is uniquely virgo--it exists nowhere else in the zodiac. no other sign has the capacity to ground, to center. there is assurance of course in the gentle touch of others, of the i feel you, i am with you, you’re going to be okay. but that’s not how seungmin brings comfort. it’s not gentle, it’s not soft. it’s not treating someone like they’re about to shatter to pieces. it is an unyielding and forceful kind of comfort. you are breathing. your heart is beating. you are alive--now fucking act like it. that’s what seungmin does, he brings his teammates back to the ground and he ties them there, strings a rope between his hand and theirs so that there is no slipping away. it’s a rough love, a tough love, but it works. like splashing your face with cold water, or pinching the back of your hand. a little bit of pain – just a little – to remind you that you are still alive. you’re still feeling. and then seungmin will sit and he will wait and he will keep his teammates together until they’re strong enough to do it themselves. nothing weathers the winds and the waters of time like a virgo’s love. 
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there are souls in this world who have lived many lives. people that you encounter and can sense, somehow, somewhere, a very immense sort of old. not old like grandparents or textbooks, not old as in dusty attics or love letters, black and white photographs. old as in ancient. like the sea, or the mountains, the canyons. the redwood trees and the milky way. sometimes you encounter people who hold that great vastness of time in them, and yongbok is one of those people. his soul has been around for a very, very long time. it’s seen the oceans rise and the moon go yellow. this is not its first time on earth, nor will it be its last.
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yongbok is the old-soul virgo. the contemplative, philosophical one with his head in the clouds. he spends a lot of his time thinking, just like all virgos do. they are the overthinkers, the worriers. worring over things that have happened, are happening, will happen. past, present, and future, worry worry worry. and i know he doesn’t really come across like that at first. i too was fooled into believing that yongbok does not have a brain. plot twist: i actually think yongbok might use his brain the most. not for common sense, or anything. like let’s be real: yongbok has definitely never asked himself whether the thing that he is doing, such as eating a banana peel or gluing googly eyes to all of minho’s possessions, is a good thing to be doing. that thought process has never entered his head, nor will it ever enter his head. this is because wisdom and intelligence are different traits, and while yongbok’s got wisdom coming out the ass, he’d sit on wet paint because he didn’t take the time to read the sign. i think that’s why i’ve always felt like yongbok wasn’t really made to be an idol. like, of course he deserves it and he belongs with stray kids. he’s good enough and he’s brave enough and he’s strong enough. but there’s just something about him that screams i was not made for a life of glass and steel and concrete. i was not made for a camera lens. he was made for a cottage on the edge of the sea where he can sit and contemplate the great unknown unhindered by paparazzi or a world-class act. he’s too soft for that, too gentle. too sincere and genuine and open-hearted.
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i think yongbok learning to make peace with the discord within himself though – an inner yearning for a simple life and an unquenchable thirst for success – by finding fulfilment outside of the business end of stray kids and devoting himself instead to his members. i could talk for hours about yongbok and his cooking and his sunshine, but i’ll restrain myself and just say: yongbok isn’t the backbone of the team. he doesn’t have the strength and willpower the way chan or minho do, the physical capacity to endure weight and pressure and carry his teammates to the finish line like changbin. he’s not grounding like seungmin or jeongin, he’s not electrifying like jisung, and he doesn’t bleed humanity like hyunjin. yongbok’s power, his role in stray kids, comes from his softness and his genuine love for them. the way he looks at them like they hung the stars. the gentle, silly, dumb ways he loves them, gives and shows that love just by being present. he’s the sunshine kid, he brings warmth because he brings love, because it comes off of him in waves. 
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and then there’s jisung. little jisung! a virgo in his own right, although you wouldn’t think it given his propensity for dramatics and conflict and stage-stealing. what makes jisung a virgo is his defiance. i’ve talked about it before, could talk about it until i was blue in the face, but jisung is filled with fire. i don’t know what force made him this way, but whatever it was, it made him with the intention to burn. burn down stages, burn down cities, burn down countries. ashes to ashes and dust to dust, jisung is meant to bring the world to its knees. there is a hurricane in him, a maelstrom. it strains at the seams of his skin to be released, rages against his bones until they crack under the weight of all the life he’s kept contained. there is a light in him that will never go out and every day he fights against it swallowing him whole. 
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that kind of fire knows no master. cannot be handled, cannot be contained. cannot be scripted or framed or repositioned. there is no politics in jisung’s fury and ocean, it is just sheer energy and flame—human spirit, you could say. virgos are masters of their own fates. they do not let higher powers take their will from them. the backbone of every revolution is a virgo, because they’re unfazed in the face of authority. virgos only believe in power they can see and touch. that means they are not fallible to state or god. no wonder why jyp had such trouble with jisung at first—there’s no way a kid like that, with that much cyanide and gasoline in his veins, fell into line. in fact, we know he didn’t. in a place so constrained and regimented as an entertainment company, someone like jisung must have chafed at every corner. virgos can’t be tricked into believing, there will be no blind faith from them. you have to put your money where your mouth is and prove yourself. not just that you’ve got a cause worth fighting for, but that you’re even worth the time of day to listen to in the first place. i don’t know about you, but i kinda doubt jyp’s menacing management staff and their consumerist rhetoric made the cut. it’s one in a list of a million reasons why chan stands out to me, why i know he’s so much more than he lets on. because for all that jyp entertainment tried to force jisung to his knees, chan only needed to ask. 
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aside from raging against the machine as all good virgos do, jisung is- how do i put this? jisung’s really fucking smart, in the way only virgos (and scorpios!) ever are. like okay, no lie. the kid’s this close to being a genius. whenever they play games based in deceit or lying, jisung can play them under the table. remember when i said jisung’s got an emotional intelligence that’s off the charts? this is an example of that. he knows his teammates better than they know themselves because he spends every waking hour of his day paying attention to them. i’ve noticed this with most of the “mood-makers” in kpop. their role is to keep the pulse of the group up and racing, and that means they need to know how each one of their teammates is feeling, regardless of whether he’s hiding it or not. jisung needs to have his teammates’ tells so thoroughly intuited that he can read them from the other end of a stage during a black-out between performances. that’s his job. so of course he’s a virgo, because he needs that virgo intuition and logic, the ability to fill in the gaps on the heel of a dime. to know in the hair’s width of time before the commercial break ends and they’re back on the air, if jisung needs to draw the spotlight because hyunjin’s feeling a little bit ganged up on by the hosts or chan’s voice is starting to give a little. to smooth out the edges, hide their rough edges under a veil. because that’s what he does, and that’s what he’ll always do. cover for his teammates. hold them up the only way he knows how. 
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they make a pretty formidable trio, don’t you think? between seungmin’s brutal honesty, yongbok’s stubbornness, and jisung’s wit, i imagine the three of them get what they want. that’s how virgos are. they expect more and they expect better and they do not take shit from anyone. if a virgo thinks that they’re right, there is a zero percent chance that you will get your way. it will save everyone involved time, energy, and effort to give in and acquiesce. otherwise, you’re facing an uphill battle that you will not win. not with one virgo, and certainly not with three. i honestly pity the rest of stray kids. no one does stubborn quite like an earth sign. 
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they are also, quite bluntly, essential to the team. stray kids are eight pieces of one whole, and the virgo line take up a pretty considerable fraction of that whole. without their support, be it through seungmin’s fierce and brambled comfort, yongbok’s soft and humble warmth, or jisung’s quick-thinking, stray kids would implode. there’s a reason there are earth signs in every kpop group—they’re the ones with their shit together. they’re the ones that keep everyone else’s shit together, either through nagging or just brute force. they are the grounding weight, the support net. smart, sharp, ever-aware, to show up on top of their game. stray kids’ virgos are nonstop. they’ll keep it together, keep their team together, if it fucking kills them. 
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you know how it is. different circus, same clowns. - @hexglyphs 
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monsterslovehumans · 4 years ago
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Roses in the Garden
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Pairing: Lorrin (NB human) and Borzun (M!Orc)
Rating: Explicit
Content warning: Intercrural sex, long story
Written by: Ellie Beets (Monsterslovehumans)
Another boring suitor. Another boring conversation. Which house was he from? Doesn’t matter, you, Lorrin Bormorte, are not interested. 
“Are you even listening?” You hear Gerarld say, tone insulted. 
“I’m sorry, I was thinking of how we all become soil.” You yawn, lounging further into the cozy chair in the library they were using as a date. Gerarld frowned and glared at you, shaking his head. “As I was saying, when we wed, which is hopefully by the summer” You stopped listening after when and wed. You didn’t want to marry him, you were going to refuse anyway, find some way to wiggle out and go back to your personal garden to tend to it. 
“Okay, no.” You sigh, and look over to Gerarld's shocked face. “We are not going to be wed. It isn’t going to work, mainly because you turn me off, but there’s also the fact you are not competent. You haven’t been taught to manage a house effectively, and that’s evident from this one conversation, you care only for power and wealth, and opinions of others about yourself. And I feel you would never be able to keep up with me in bed.” Sitting up, you move to stand, leaning forward until you are right in his face. “So i’m going to leave, I have better more productive things to do with my time.” You smirk, standing up and leaving the room. You really didn’t care what his expression was, though when your guard Sally walked out with you, she gave a long sigh. 
“That could have been said differently.” She stated. 
“Don’t care.” You huff and look at her smirk. “Besides you know Wyvernwards only care about expansion, they will be gone within the next 50 years, having fallen with others that stretched too far.” 
“Why decide to meet with him anyway then?” She asked, furrowing her brow. 
“Boredom, but I shouldn’t have even bothered, he’s like the rest of the suitors. They want the power of our medicine, not for the benefits but for control. We have a reputation of helping those in need..” You shrug and walk down the hall to your personal flower garden you spend your time working on. 
“Hmm...oh you’re not going to masturbate first, he must have really turned you off.” Sally teased, bumping hips with you. It’s true, Gerarld was like a cold shower. Except it actually worked against your insatiable libido.
“Fuck yeah.” You laughed and stepped out into the sun, feeling it warm your blond hair and honey toned skin on your arms. The sleeveless robes you have hiding your slender body to the world. You walk over and greet your garden like an old friend, Sally moving to sit at the garden table, taking out her book. 
“HEY TUSKFACE!” You frown as you heard Gerarld outside the wall, there must be orcs nearby, It’s true that Zriborian ones were here to meet with various houses, however the words are that they are most not welcome. You’ve never met an orc before, though you’ve never had opportunity too either. 
You look at Sally still reading her book, you knew she would be very engrossed, she didn’t even bat an eye at the shout outside. You sneak closer and closer to one of the small windows that peppered the tall wall. You see two tall orcs, a little taller than Gerarld, who was goading and calling them names. Though the orcs looked angry, they stayed back, glaring at the human. 
Until they were called cowards and weak. You could see them tense up and clench their jaws. You felt like you needed to get involved, it was your words that put Gerarld in a foul mood enough to try and pick a fight. You quickly climb up and down the wall. Walking straight up to Gerarld, who stopped to look at you. A sneer on his face. 
“What now, you arrogant bastard, come to insult me some more?” He growled at you, though part of him looked hopeful that you would apologize. You could tell with the lift of his chin. 
“No, just to give you a gift.” You say sweetly, fluttering your eyes at him, though he seemed to have relaxed, he still kept sneering. He opened his hand, expecting an object. But you merely punched him in the face. 
“What the f-” He said, ready to punch back before you heard a snarl from one of the orcs. Something so hideously terrifying to hear that you felt cold run down your spine. Gerarld must have felt it as well, because he backed off, staring at the snarling orc with fear. 
“This isn’t over” He spat at your feet and walked off. 
You look down at the spit before you, though you weren’t insulted by the act, merely amused.
“Thank you” You look over to the pair of orcs and smile. “Even though I know I can take the punch.” You chuckled. 
“LORRIN BORMORTE” You heard Sally rush over to you, finally realizing that you were gone. She stopped when she saw you in front of the orcs, looking at them suspiciously.
“Oh don’t worry, I’m fine, thanks to these two. Gerarld was trying to pick a fight.” 
“You did insult his prowess in bed and call him incompetent.” Sally said without hesitation. A long suffering smile pulled at her cheeks. freckles, sun kisses, she insisted on them being called, peppering her light skinned face.
“Well, he looks like he wouldn’t be able to satisfy, and he was incompetant.” You snipe back, rolling your eyes and turning to look at the orcs who seemed very amused. “Anyway, I hope you two the best of luck, you’re going to get a lot of shit thrown your way here.” You say, giving a tired smile. Allowing yourself to be led back into the gardens where you went back to tending your plants.
You didn’t think much of the interaction, but your impression of orcs were they look big and scary, and could be big and scary but if you gave them respect they return in kind. That and their bodies just did things to your libido. They made your mouth and body yearn for something, and no toy could satisfy you anymore when it could before. 
A week after the interaction, and you still were not satisfied. You flop onto your bed in frustration, your naked heated body, too sensitive as you touched yourself again and again. As you tried all of your inserting aids, from large to small to try and achieve the release you need. But you knew you needed to bed an orc, and you knew your father would never allow it. He doesn’t even want you fucking humans before you’re married. 
Though one unsuspecting morning, the front doors open with a slam. You jump out of bed and groan, ass and body sore from need. Sally rushed in, looking a little scared. “Get dressed, quickly. You don’t want to miss this” She said with a twinkle in her soft gray eyes. 
You put on your baggy robes and rush down to your father’s office, which was also open and in the middle was a massive orc taking up most of the floorspace in front of the desk. He wore furs and leather armour, brawny and thick, you felt your mouth dry up in need. Oh boy. 
“I have come to make an alliance, youths of my tribe have told me, you were more tolerant of humans.” His deep voice was powerful, vibrating to your soul, and into your loins. Before your father could open his mouth and drive him away you walked in. 
“I do no- Oh...Lorrin” He said through clenched teeth. “What are you doing out of bed, your sickness...has” 
“I’m not sick, father, just horny. Anyway, I’ve come to see our guest.”
“He was just leaving. “ Henry said quickly, though the massive orc remained still, staring at you inquisitively. You stared up and met his green eyes, something clicked within you, it was the wisdom and intellect you saw, you could tell right away this orc fought to be where he was, and knew how to navigate. He was strong. He could handle all parts of you. 
“You say you’ve come for an alliance, I accept your proposal.” You say evenly, but your body was pounding with need and your heart was pounding with the nerves.
“Ahh, thank you.” The orc smiled. 
“I don’t approve of the marriage,” Henry frowned, sitting down. Now it was the orc who was confused. “Marriage?” The orc asked. 
“Yes, human alliances are through marriage.” You stated, and you saw understanding dawn on his features as to why it was so hard to secure alliances here. Though he looked at you curiously, as to why you would accept in the first place. 
“ and we don’t want one. And as head of the Bormorte house, I must ask you to bid adieu, Borzun. The door is that way.” You secretly hope that this Borzun would show his father his place. But you knew the moment you met his eyes, that he would respect and leave. You place a hand on his powerful arm, hotter than your hand. You did your best to swallow your lust for this moment. He looks down his arm at you, his large tusks pointed and deadly looking. This person was not one to take what he wants, you could tell. 
“Henry, you're losing a powerful ally.” You said, using your father’s given name. “No House would touch us if I were to marry Borzun.”
“We would become a prariahs, child, that is why they would not touch us” He shot back.
“We are too important to lose for a city, they would lose their medicines. With the help of Zriborian tribes, our recipes would be safe for the public, we could continue our house mission and stay protected. “ You say softly, walking to the front of the desk and placing your hands on the wooden desk. “Our house could last longer than any before, with a wise man such as yourself at the helm.” You saw it was working, and your father considered it. You are dismayed by the ease that your father could be swayed with a bit of flattery. You can't wait to inherit the Beaumorte house and revitalize it. 
“We will discuss this further, together for tea.” Henry said standing up. “Sally dear, could you get the kitchen to make a meeting ready. “  Sally, who was watching this with a hidden smirk, she nods and goes to the kitchen. Speaking of a new suitor. 
“Now Bordun '' Henry said casually, though you could see Borzun tense at the wrong name. 
“Borzun” You corrected. Henry nodded idly and continued to walk, expecting you two to follow. The massive orc looked at you, and you grinned up at him, not for any particular reason other than you felt a moment of giddiness. He gives an uncertain smile back, his eyes looking into your before looking hungrily at your mouth. Surprisingly he looked away, but the dark colour on his pallid skin showed his shyer side. This will be fun. 
 You sat at the table across from Bozun while Henry sat at the head, they were discussing the terms of the alliance, that they would protect House Bormorte in exchange for their services, wealth and recipes. As they spoke, you spent your time observing Borzun. The way he would patiently correct Henry on the misuse of his name, though you could see that he was annoyed by it. His green eyes were calculating, thinking of his next words, he was intelligent. So deeply so. 
“Bormorte, thank you for taking the time to consider this alliance” He said, voice low, while he was addressing Henry, you knew it was for you. .Fuck did that make your stomach drop, you crept your foot closer to his and gently slid it over it. You saw him tense and his skin darkening. Luckily Henry didn’t really notice much. 
“Ah glad I did, now let’s toast to this alliance” Henry took his tea cup and lifted it up. You run your foot up Borzun’s leg, you pick up the teacup, and watch as Borzun skin grows darker in his cheeks and neck, though he picks up the cup as well. It was so tiny in his fingers, you swallow and think of holding it, how it would feel with your smaller one. Your foot pushes past his knee as you all bring the teacups to the lips. Your eyes fix on his lips and tusks, you rub the top of your foot on his inner thigh, not going further, he takes a sip, though he looks at you for a fraction of a second. His whole face grows dark in need, only for that fraction of a second, before he turns to look at Henry, who was looking at him expectantly. You felt him open his legs a little, deliberate, an invitation.
“Ah, it’s very complex tea, a-are these herbs from your gardens?” Borzun said, it was a topic Henry could spend a great time talking about, you tuned out the tea talk, pressing further at the invitation to explore your future partner, you gently feel and touch, though the moment you press your foot against his cock, and feel how truely thick it was, you felt yourself grow red in the face. It was bigger than your toys, that's for sure. You look at Borzun’s face, he seemed almost smug, though he was blushing as much as you. 
Henry was looking at his cup of tea, listing all the medicinal benefits of it, you push your foot to the base and feel more and more the girth and weight of it, you feel your mouth water at wondering how it would feel inside your mouth, inside your ass. You felt that deep need and want flame up. You look over to Sally, who was watching the entire exchange with amusement barely contained. you try to tell her with your face that you needed some private time. 
“Ah, Head Bormorte, if I may interject, perhaps Lorrin and Borzun could take a tour of the gardens, to get to know each other. “ When Henry opened his mouth, Sally smiled. “I’ll chaperone of course. If they are to wed, it would be best to get some awkwardness out of the way.” Henry frowned, wanting to speak more about medicinal properties, though he nodded, remembering all the work he had before Borzun walked in. 
Borzun looked between you and Sally nervously. He opened his mouth to say something but you pressed his cock between your foot and his stomach, a low growl escaped his mouth, he reached down and grabbed your foot, staring deep into your eyes, trying to understand you. You felt yourself freeze, he was fast. He stared at you in silence, you sit now in fear but anticipation, you were excited obviously, because you’ve finally met your match. He seemed to have seen what he was trying to find. 
“Hmmm.” He said, nearly a groan and let go of your foot, allowing you to continue to touch him. Oh wow that sound, you slip under the table, you saw him twitch on the bench that was provided. Crawling closer, you needed to see his cock close up, reaching out  and pulling open his leather shorts, you take the heavy meat in your hand, he wasn’t hard yet, though you could tell he was about to start. Oh he will only get bigger, you felt yourself tremble, you would need to get larger toys if you had any hope of enjoying yourself on the honeymoon. 
“Ahh, do I pass your inspection?” He said with a laugh, he must have noticed that I spent a long time just staring. “Or do you need a moment to take it all in?” You heard the uncertainty in his tone. 
“Oh sweet pea, I don’t think I can at the moment, but fuck, do I want to.” You saw his cock twitch in arousal. Best to try and find a private space in the gardens before continuing this further, you smirk and crawl back into your chair and grin in triumph, until you see the deep blush, he can't look at you. 
“But cock aside, you’re smart, and a good leader, the younger orcs I’ve met are proof of that. They did not give in to goading. make no mistake, that is why I agreed, House Bormorte is old, but with Henry at the helm it’s declining, our house will be blessed should we keep up our code of helping others, he wishes to privatize the treatments. Should we fall into greed, then we shall be cursed.” You sigh, staring out the window. 
“Ah, Braugh, mentioned you punched before he could, I want to thank you. The damage that would have done to the human would have been irreparable. I do not wish him to learn war so early on. “ The cadence of his voice bespoke of growing up in a turbulent time, it’s obvious from the scars on his body as well. 
“I do not want war either, nor do I want my house in ruin, or the people to die from preventable illnesses.” I felt myself open up, he stared at me without judgment, it felt nice for a change. You place your hand over his and stare up at him. “We align ourselves similarly, I could tell the moment our eyes met.” Borzun coughed, and looked away though the smile on his betusked face melted your heart. “Ahh...let’s go for that walk in the gardens” You stand up suddenly, body burning from just his smile. 
Sally chuckled and smirked at you. You poke your tongue out, knowing the great conversation you two will have later on. Borzun tucked himself back in, staring at you  two curiously before following you to the gardens. 
“Even in Zribor we hear of the Bormorte gardens. It’s wonderful to see such life.” He said softly, staring at the greenery in wonder. You wonder what Zribor is like, to speak of life as if it were a rare thing. “Such hard work.” He says, pushing a flower up with his thick finger with such care that it validated your choice. 
“My flower garden is this way” You say softly, quickly taking his hand and pulling him along to the back of the gardens behind thick hedge walls. Through the gate you saw the lush and well tended garden you spent so much time on, you never bring a suitor here however you could tell Borzun would appreciate it. And when you looked at his face, the awe was worth it. He Then turned to look at you, that deep understanding stare. You felt yourself shuffle against your will, he lifted your chin so you would look at him. You felt the impulse to give him a kiss, to see how it would feel with his tusks, to see how he would react. 
You were known to not shy away from these sort of feelings, and so you quickly pressed your mouth against him, pulling him down by his face. It came as a surprise, and he tensed before his large hands came to rest on your hips. You felt him chuckle against your lips, pulling you closer. Oh. you could feel him twitch in his shorts.
“Fuck.” You whine, trembling in need, pushing him deeper into the corner of the flower garden, a more private area, he allowed you to guide him to the ground where you straddle his lap. “Now, I’m sure you’ve guessed, I can be a little insatiable” You smirk down at him, pulling up your robes to your hips and wiggling until you are firmly planted on the full tent of his cock. 
“A little?” He huffed a laugh, his cheeks dark, before holding back a growl when you wiggled. “What about…” He said looking at Sally’s back as she kept guard over you, though she was respectfully distanced away. “Oh.” He realized, looking a little shy again, though he did smile. 
“Yea, right now, Im’ a lot insatiable, but usually it’s low key insatiable.” You teased. “Now can you keep up big boy?” You sighed softly as you rubbed your hind end against his now peeking, half hard from your earlier easings. You watch him reach down under you and release his cock, it sprang up and smacked you on your stomach. You feel yourself tremble, ohhhh message received, you lick your lips and look down at the now fully hard cock, you just stare at it. Oh. fuck. Yes. You get up, kneel on the ground, looking over your shoulder at him, still holding up your robes. “You won’t be able to fit...yet” you smirk at him, he looked a little stunned but the twitch and beading of precum spoke of his excitement. 
“But for now, my thighs will do.” Taking a bottle of oil you keep on you, you oil up your thighs, frangrant smell of roses wafting up to him. You heard a small growl of delight, as he pulled you back from his sitting position, making you squawck in surprise, pressing his cock between your thighs, he held you close to his large body, his strong arms tensing around you, you keep your legs closed, feeling his powerful chest against your back and seeing his large cock between your thighs, has you trembling in orgasm. It usually takes you much longer to cum, but there was something so good about this. 
“Ahh…” he groaned into your ear, his cock twich at the sight as well. He pulls your face over to his, kissing you hungrily, his hips rolling slow and steady. “Oh…. Gods.” You felt your heart flutter, you felt you could have years, decades even of this orc just from this one kiss. 
“OH man,  I wish you could fit inside, my ass yearns for it” You blurted after the kiss, he growled and gave you an even filthier kiss. 
“Human. You are making me tread a dangerous path.” He pulled away, he held your hips and gave your ass a hearty hump, causing you to cover your moan, his heavy balls smacking you. You pant behind your hand as he rolled his hips and pushed his cock between your legs, you stared transfixed at the thick meat pulled in and out from between your thighs, but it wasn’t enough. You needed a little more to be satisfied.  You reach behind you and start to tease your asshole, whining when you press your finger in. You see him spurt at your fevered act, though he hadn’t fully cummed, he was still hard and ready. His hand on your chest you try and wiggle to get your finger deeper but it wasn’t enough. You needed something more...thicker. Looking down you see his thick fingers, each one as large as a human's cock, you smirk as an idea came to you. 
“Mmmmm finger fuck me Borzun” you turn to look at him, he froze and you felt more then heard the deep growl of want. He spun you around suddenly, you felt him reach for the oil and slick a finger up. You roll your hips up against his finger, kissing him to hold back a moan. As he pushes his finger deeper within you, you wiggle in delight, whining softly. “Oh wow…” you gasp as he starts to wiggle his finger in ways that bespoke of expertise. You press against his shoulder, kissing his neck, your thighs clenched against his cock fighting the urge to open them and invite him in. Now you will wait till the honeymoon, fully prepared. You felt another finger tease your entrance, he pulled you back by your hair, just shy of rough, it was enough to make your orgasm once again. “Oh gods….” You whine and grasp behind his neck, as he moves into mouth and nibbles at your throat, mindful of his tusks scraping gently the delicate skin of your neck. You whimper in delight, letting your head fall back into his hand as he teased another finger in, giving a hum of delight at your ability to do so. You trembled, eyes up at the sky as the pleasure you felt, his hips bucking his thick cock between thighs you felt something wet splash inside your robes against your body. Ohhh...that...that was quite….substantial wetness. It was a note in your mind before Borzun nipped to get your attention, or perhaps he was as fevered as you this point. 
You coupling went on, and on until you finally collapsed against him, spent and satisfied for the first time of your life. 
He was still hard. 
“Fuck.” You say in awe, looking down at his twitching cock through your robes, you were sure you felt him cum a few times already, if fact your thighs and your body were a mess with seed. 
“Gods” you breath as he reaches down and strokes himself for you, slow and languid, pulling your robes up higher. He wasn’t done, in fact the look on his face speaks of just getting warmed up. “I just want you to cum over and in me right now” You saw his hand stop, and you look at him, confused. He stared at you in shock by your words that quickly turned to desire so unbridled and strong that if you weren’t already spent, you could have gone another round.  you saw him close his eyes to try and calm himself. 
“Lorrin…” He growled, opening his eyes again. You smirk at his flushed cheeks and lust filled eyes, pride swelling at the fact that you did this to him, your words. 
“Borzun…” You stated back, crawling a line of kisses up to his mouth. “Can you cum on me please? I need you so bad” You say sweetly, licking into his mouth. You felt something wet splash and douse your stomach all the way to your chin. “Mmmm thank you, sweet pea” You stare at him with half lidded eyes, kissing a tusk. He pants in shock, his cock starting to soften. He flops back and stares at you in wonder and awe. You watch him openly, feeling good about this, you watch him look at the mess he left on your body, eyes darkening again in want, but you felt his cock twitch half heartedly. He was about to speak before a voice interjected. 
“Gods, Lorrin, you slutty slutty person, now i’m going to have to get you a new robe. ” Sally laughed when she turned to look at you. “Happy?” She winked at you
“Honey, like you wouldn’t believe” You say, staring down at Borzun with a sweet smile on your lips, leaning over you kiss him softly on his lips. “I can’t wait till our honeymoon” You purr, causing Borzun to match your sweet smile, though slightly dazed as he stared at your messy body.  
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