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manicpixiefelix · 11 months ago

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head, heart, hand. {Felix Catton/Reader/Oliver Quick}

Part 3.

Summary: Your second year at Oxford brings with it Farleigh, much to your delight, and you get to learn about Farleigh's personal nemesis (which he rolls his eyes at every time you call him that) Oliver. It turns out Oliver's actually very lovely, and does Felix quite the favour one unassuming morning. Farleigh's not happy to see him again, but Felix is.

{ masterpost }

Need to Know: They/Them. Explicitly NB Reader. FWB!Reader/Felix. Reader is from a well off family but has pretty much been adopted by the Cattons.

Warnings: heavy drinking by everyone at the pub including the reader, and 'dog' being used to demean the reader once.

A/N: 5101 words. much longer than the last ones, and we finally have oliver!! very excited to FINALLY be able to write their weird little fuckin dynamic at oxford, i love them all very much. im a bit unhappy with the pacing of the beginning but i like how it picks up once oli is introduced, but also the bar scene is SO LONG and i will not apologise i love them your honour. id be mighty grateful for any feedback or if you have any thoughts in general about the story, i stare at so many kind asks in my inbox lovingly, i will answer them very soon i promise!! also this is so unedited, sorry lol.

Taglist: @strangemaximoff @renaissance-mama @tsach @malscorner @xhoneymoonx134 @yelchinweasleylothbrok @tarriea @florencediet @butitsbetterifyoudoittoem @belladonnadarksshade @fandom-multiamory @snazzynacho @jubileexoxo @soocore @be-lla-vie @nightingale2124 @willow-sages @null4ndv0id @gracieluvthemoon @day2dream @marvellover98 @navixfr @bitxhinthecomments @daintylovers @alesunsets @noturningbacknow @d0llysposts @alilcloudy @callsignwidow @moviequotes23 @325575 @bonnieblue0606 @osoqueen125 @hot-dino-nuggies @darkness-falls-xo @mattymurderdocks @flowerecs @weepingwitchofthewest @ilovemydinoboi @marsmallow433 @king0flies @cashtons-wife

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At first you don't notice him for who he is. At first you hear about Farleigh's insufferable tutoring partner. At first, Oliver Quick means absolutely nothing to you.

The most important part of your second year of college is that Farleigh has finally conceded to joining you and Felix at Oxford. Once, during the last Summer break, while Felix had been off confronting his at-the-time good friend Eddie, after Farleigh had told him Eddie and Venetia had been sleeping together, you and Farleigh had gotten high in the maze to avoid the fallout.

Since the Cattons were paying for his education, he'd admitted that he wanted to remove himself as much as possible from his mother's legacy and memory and the guilt Sir James held about his sister. It would be hard to do at a college where he would be a legacy student because of his mother's attendance. You think you partly understood; certain people, usually staff, liked to kiss your ass when they found out about your own legacy status and the people your parents became, you're not so sure they'd treat Farleigh the same, all things considered.

But he's out of options.

Sometimes you're not sure what to make of Farleigh; his strange place in the Catton family was never something they seemed to like to discuss around you, but Farleigh was far more candid about it. So when he pulls these stunts, gets himself kicked out of schools, puts himself in precarious positions despite how you knew he genuinely enjoyed academics, especially literature, you can't help but wonder why.

"Don't try and pathologize it," you could hear him rolling his eyes as he attempted to scale the minotaur statue in the middle of the maze. Looking up at him from where you're laying in the grass, you watch him rise above the walls into the sunshine. Maybe it's dangerous, maybe he should stop, get down, be safe, but he looks far more content up there, on the edge. Maybe he feels freer up there, even if he knows it's not true.

So now he's with you and Felix at Oxford, a first year only academically, he slots perfectly into the group of friends you'd both already managed to collect.

The point is, you have no idea that of everything that happens in those first few weeks of your second year, the parties, the hook ups, the social dances you found yourself doing, that the guy Farleigh likes to complain about from his tutoring sessions - Oliver, Farleigh always says it with an eye roll - would mean so much more to you than you'd ever expect.

Everything about the man you would come to find extraordinary, from the outside, was completely, and charmingly, ordinary. Including how you'd met him.

Felix had overslept again, and threw a pillow at the door when you'd stuck your head into his room to remind him that he had classes. You'd left yourself enough time to walk, but Felix would have to at least run if he didn't get his ass up soon, or would ride his bike instead. Its on your way, so you duck your head in to at least check it there.

What you don't expect is the unassuming man with dark hair to have a gentle, almost caressing hand on the tire of Felix's bike. When you make a confused noise, he about jumps a foot in the air.

"Sorry," he seems to shrink in from himself, recoiling from the bike like he'd been caught red handed, "just admiring." He babbles, but can't meet your eyes. For a moment, you look over him, before turning your attention to the ludicrously expensive mountain bike that Felix has always taken for granted.

"It is a nice bike," you find yourself grinning, stepping towards the bike and giving the tire a squeeze, both as a show of your own appreciation, and to test the pressure, just in case, "didn't mean to spook you..." And you trail off, prompting for his name, holding your hand out.

It hangs in the air for a moment, and the man before you gives you a proper look over. The way he holds himself, as if trying to take up as little space as physically possible, but his eyes, his gaze, oh it longed to swallow whole every detail of everything he cast it upon.

"Oliver," he says after a very long moment. Despite his demure voice, there's something deliberate, unwavering about it, "Quick," he follows it up with, "I'm Oliver Quick." And he ducks his gaze, sparing you from his intensity as you shake his hand.

"Oliver Quick," you turn the name over on your tongue; the same Oliver that Farleigh's been complaining about, you ponder, before giving him a smile, "I'm Y/N." As soon as the handshake drops, Oliver's doing that thing again, shrinking back and looking uncomfortable in the space.

"Yeah, I think I've seen you around," Oliver nods but can't meet your gaze, "around campus, I mean -" Which reminds you -

"Fuck, I'm almost running late," you hissed, spinning on your heel, "sorry to run Ollie, you seem lovely!" You call over your shoulder as you bolt to class, hearing him calling out;

"No trouble," and awkwardly trailing off the further away you get, "you seem... very nice too..."

Bursting through the door to your tutorial with five minutes to spare, your lecture looks up from his desk for a brief moment. Giving him a nod, you try and slip past him to grab a seat by one of your friends, chatting near the back, when he raises his voice.

"No Mister Catton today either, I presume," he says with a sigh, and you again check you watch before plastering on an apologetic smile.

"He'll be here," you assured, "promise." The professor did not seem impressed.

Sitting next to India, she immediately greets you with a hug.

"Felix hung over?" She grins, and you anyway in respond with a smirk.

"After last night? I'd assume so."

"King's Arms tonight?"

"Of course."

When he does eventually show up, it's ten minutes late with an apology about how his bike had gotten a flat tire. The professor, just tells him to take a seat, and Felix does with many placating thanks, sliding into one of the open few open seats in the row in front of yours. Ruffling his hair, he throws a faintly guilty grin over his shoulder at you and India, telling you both not to start.

After the tutorial, you fully intend of having lunch with India, as the two of you don't have any other classes until the afternoon, the two of you walk with Felix to where he'd stashed his bike before his next lecture. Except -

"That's not yours," you look at the bicycle curiously, "I thought you had a flat."

"Had," Felix agrees, wheeling the unfamiliar bike from the rack with a grin, "bloody angel of a man lent me his."

"Of course someone just gave you their bike," India chuckles, reaching out to give Felix's shoulder a squeeze before he mounts the bike with intent to take off.

"Lent," Felix grinned back, "I'm gonna give it back."

"And what about yours?" You asked, eyebrows raised.

"He took it back for me."

"Your hero," you laughed, shaking your head at him.

"My absolute hero," Felix agreed, "I'll tell you about it later, okay? King's Arms tonight?"

And once he's away, and you and India are on your way to the campus cafe, her arm tucked in hers, she gives you a knowing, almost exasperated smile.

"You're already trying to figure out how to fix his tire, aren't you?" Her nails dig a little too much and her smile's a little too sly and her tone almost grates against a thought you don't like to consider, so you push it to the back of your mind and give an embarrassed little smile.

"Was it that obvious?"

"No, but you are," she leans in, lips almost against your ear, smile in her voice, "endearingly predictable," she murmurs against the shell of your ear, "you're always wrapped up in him."

"Right now I seem to be rather wrapped up in you," you rest your free hand on hers, tucked into the crook of her elbow, taking her hint and lowering your voice to something flirty.

"And make darling Felix wait?" She teased in response. Instead of answering her properly, you ask her back to your dorm under the guise of lunch and she happily accepts.

The bike shop is closed and Felix has class and you can't even be sure if this supposed bike saviour has even returned Felix's bike by now; there's no waiting, but India likes feeling prioritised, so you keep all that to your self. India likes to feel important in Felix's life. Anyone who Felix spends even a little of his time and attention on ends up rather addicted to that feeling, to feeling special to Felix Catton, and India is one of the many who have picked up on your own importance to the man himself.

So you're not dating India. You're also not not dating India; you're a placeholder of sorts, which would be cruel to you if you didn't like her well enough or if you weren't satisfied taking your fun with her. It would also probably be cruel to India if she knew the truth, that Felix thought she was hot and wasn't ready to commit to maybe dating her, but that he was getting that way he sometimes got about people, that he wanted them around, wanting to not share them, but without devoting himself to them. That's where you come in. A placeholder. A proxy. An almost. Someone who makes this pretty girl feel important and close to Felix. Someone Felix isn't worried about falling in love with India even while keeping her happy and around.

When you arrive late to the King's Arms with your own around India's shoulders, Felix lights up while Farleigh, from beside him, narrows his eyes with a smirk.

"Cute shade of lipstick," he says slyly, even as he moves over at Felix's insistence to fit both yourself and India in the booth beside him. Farleigh flicks the collar of the shirt you'd thrown on in a rush to get dressed for afternoon classes, "on both of you."

"Are you jealous, Farleigh?" India grins, taking it all in stride as you pull your collar out with your thumb to try and inspect it. India's lipstick was smeared faintly against the collar from where she'd been enthusiastically kissing her way down your jaw a few hours earlier.

"Of course," Farleigh's sly smile widens to a cocky grin, and he winks at her, while she leans over you to plant a kiss on the corner of his mouth with a wicked grin.

"Right in front of her partner?" Annabel, Felix's latest fling was on his other side, reaching over Felix to shove Farleigh's shoulder with a scandalised laugh.

"Not really together," India mused, even as she shifted to lean heavily against you, her arm around you and tucking herself up by your side. You nodded in kind, shrugging as Felix had to hide his laughter in his pint.

"And besides," Farleigh declares in a voice you knew all too well, "if anyone knows how to share it's Y/N," with a cheshire-cat smile and making a show of putting his hand far up your thigh under the table. Surprised by the outright boldness of it all, Felix, who had been trying to take a sip to cover his amusement, ends up snorting beer out of his nose as he laughs, which sets the whole table off.

It's later in the night, several rounds of drinks and plates of chips, when you finally remember to ask Felix about his bike. There's this look in his eyes as he recounts the details, how he'd somehow gotten on the wrong side of something small and sharp when he'd been found by his 'absolute hero'.

"Ollie," he says brightly, "Ollie - Oliver - something, I don't -" he's babbling, and though he doesn't at the time, both yourself and Farleigh react, though in vastly different ways.

"Oliver?" Farleigh draws out the name with disdain, like it's done him some sort of personal affront, or set off a bad smell, judging by his expression.

"Don't make that face," Felix rolls his eyes, giving Farleigh a good-natured shove, but it's all becoming background noise to you as you glance over your shoulder. In your mind, all you can focus on the brief but captivating moments you shared with a blue-eyed Oliver just this morning. As if by fate, when you finally come back to reality, and realise you're staring at the bar, you see those same blue eyes staring back at you, intense and surprised.

"There he is!" Behind you, Felix's voice raises above the din of the pub with barely restrained glee, "Ollie! Oliver! Oliver!" And immediately those blue eyes snap to your attention-grabbing best friend, "come over here, mate!" Felix insists, and you drop your gaze with a faint smile.

As Felix loudly and insistently vies for Oliver's attention and company, you briefly raise your gaze, only to see the disdain on Farleigh's face having grown immensely.

Oliver. Farleigh's classmate Oliver. Insufferable tutoring Oliver. Know-it-all Oliver. 'Thus' Oliver. No regard for style in his academics or his wardrobe Oliver.

Felix's hero, Oliver.

Considering how much joy Farleigh took from ribbing you at every given opportunity, just to see your squirm for his amusement, you supposed you could take some joy from his discomfort in this moment. When he sees your smug smile he scowls at you.

"This guy's my fucking hero," you've heard that warmth in Felix's voice a hundred times over, "just telling everyone how you saved my ass today," you wonder how long it will take Oliver to fall for him too.

Oliver, for his part, plays at being abashed as the rest of the group gives him faint compliments, gaze surprisingly shallow as he takes you all in. Keeping your own eyes down for the moment, you take the cigarette from India that you'd been sharing with her. You quickly reach into Felix's jean pocket beside you for the lighter you know is there, and when you look up to light it, cigarette poised between your lips, you see Oliver's gaze momentarily focused on the lack of space between yourself and Felix, where your hand had disappeared. Felix, you know without even having to look at him, hasn't even looked away from Oliver once.

"Take a seat, I owe you a drink," Felix grins, and is already shoving the few people on his left, before you put a hand on his arm to get him to settle down.

"Could you get the next round, India?" You ask her quietly, and though she hesitates for a moment, she relents, considering it was meant to be her shout after all.

Oliver is hesitating as India stands and smooths out her skirt, heading for the bar, and finally Felix remembers that most people's worlds don't revolve around him.

"Oh, sorry, are you with friends?"

Another moment of deliberation from Oliver, before he finally relents to Felix, and agrees to join them. Looking around, there's a chair next to a table behind Farleigh that was going unused, or -

When you pat the now empty seat at the end of the booth beside yourself, you're not looking at Oliver. Chin in your hand and cigarette poised between your fingers, you're giving Farleigh a grin that's all teeth, while he looks like he's trying to stave off a sudden tension headache.

"Come here, Oliver Quick," you refuse to explain your smug smile, "I don't bite."

"Yes they do," Farleigh huffs in irate response, to which most of the rest of the group cracks up. The leather beside you shifts, and you can feel the heat Oliver radiates before you even look at him.

"Quick, Oliver Quick!" Felix, behind you, is muttering almost to himself, before adding, "wait, how did you know that?" And throwing himself practically over your shoulder as you'd turned to face Oliver properly.

"We met this morning," you say quietly, gaze fixed on Oliver's, on the way he's taking you both in. With Felix's chin on your shoulder, the two of you cheek to cheek and watching him with interest, it could be enough to send anyone else running. But his gaze isn't the shallow one he'd ghosted across the others, he's drinking this moment, and the both of you, in. Smile stretching wide across your face and you tip your head against Felix's, "just as lovely as I thought," and turning your face even slightly towards Felix means your lips against his temple, not that either of you seem to mind, "your hero."

"My fuckin' hero," Felix agrees adamantly, though you and he sit back as India approaches with a tray of pints and an exasperated look.

"And you've given up my seat," she sighs, placing the drinks on the table for everyone else to take their share. Farleigh's already passive-aggressively reached behind himself to grab the extra empty chair, and you promise to make it up to her with a heavy layer of implications that the rest of the table snickers at.

Introductions are made and drinks are had and the night carries on apace until you, at the very least, felt like you could call yourself reasonably wasted. Despite how quiet Oliver is in the general conversation, Felix makes a point of always including him, arm around your shoulders so he can lean across you to talk to him, while Oliver just tried to keep up.

Everything about Oliver shouted that these people weren't his people; his clothes, his accent, his vernacular, his very unfamiliarity with who so many of them were considering their families were often titans of industry. Still, you respected the effort he was making to keep up. Whenever even the hint of a joke at Oliver's expense could be felt in the air, Felix shut it down, and though it started out subtle, it became less so as the night wore on; the grateful look on Oliver's face, even as he tried to duck to hide it, said how much he appreciated the gesture.

It's decided almost unanimously by the time you have to buy a round that it should be the first round of shots for the table. Several more would be to come, but you were getting tequila, and all the fanfare that came with it.

Getting back to the table you find Oliver's slid into your spot by Felix. Though he tries to apologise and get up, you shush him, insisting it's fine as you sit down next to him with the tray of shots topped with lime wedges, and the shot glass half full of salt for the table the bartender had kindly provided.

"You do know this is why I was late to my tutorial this morning," Felix still helped himself to a shot glass with lime as the salt was being passed around the table.

"Salt?" Oliver frowned at the glass in front of him, "lime?"

"You've never done tequila shots before?" Farleigh scoffed, holding India's hand up in front of himself where she'd offered it to him to apply salt.

"No, I haven't," is all Oliver can say awkwardly, watching as Farleigh sprinkled a line of salt across the back of India's aloft hand, licking it up in one swift motion before he took the shot and bit the lime in quick succession.

"Salt, shot, lime," you give Oliver a nudge to bring his attention back to you.

"Salt, shot, lime," Oliver repeats, looking from his glass to the glass full of salt that Felix had reached over and brought to your side of the table, "do I have to lick the salt off of someone else?"

"Not necessarily," Felix says from his other side, while Annabel giggled and allowed him to apply salt to her hand.

"More fun that way," she adds coyly.

"Not unless you want to," your own shot glass sits untouched, salt now sitting between both your glasses.

"Do you- should I-" Oliver's stumbling over his words, fidgeting with the end of the lime.

"Lick it off their neck," Farleigh barked from across the table, and though you tried to tell Oliver that he didn't have to do anything like that, and Felix's disappointed admonishment of his cousin, the entire rest of the table, who had finished their own shots and were now invested in the drama, light up with agreement.

"You're so crass, you're gonna give him the wrong idea," Felix groaned, rolling his eyes with frustration.

"I love Y/N but I don't think there is a wrong idea about them -"

"Watch what the fuck you say about them, Farleigh -"

"Watch what I say about your fucking dog-?"

"I'll lick their neck!" Oliver announces at the top of his lungs, interrupting the vicious barb, and the way Felix had practically leapt across half the table in a sudden fury. For a long moment, tense silence hangs in the air, Farleigh half out of his chair, wearing a sneer, and Felix braced over the table with white-knuckled fists pressed into the woodgrain. Then, as Felix sits back down and things begin to ease, once again all eyes return to Oliver, who's shifting in his seat, looking at you with almost apology in his eyes, "if- if you're okay with that."

After a beat, you break into a self deprecating smile.

"I do like getting my neck licked," you laughed, and immediately angled your head and pulled the collar of your shirt to the side so he could have a better angle and more of your shoulder to apply salt. The tension dropped almost entirely as everyone but Farleigh and Felix burst out in cheers. Chatter arose again as Oliver fumbled with the salt, but you caught Felix's eyes from behind him. Tension in his brow that you longed to smooth away, and discomfort in his gaze, but when you smiled you could see him take a breath, and smile back.

"I won't bite," it comes as a surprise when you hear Oliver say this, so quiet only you can hear as he diligently applies a sprinkle of salt to the soft skin of where your throat meets your shoulder, "promise," you can't see his expression but you think you can hear him smirking. It actually sounds almost like flirting.

India's been glaring at you across the table whenever she hasn't been flirting overtly with Farleigh for the past half an hour. So you flirt back.

"Not even if I ask nicely?" You murmur back, trying to repress the thrill that the whole moment was giving you. You hear the faintest, momentary rumble of a laugh from Oliver before you feel his hand on your thigh as if to steady himself, and his tongue on your neck. It's barely a second of contact, the delicate caress of his mouth as he licked the line of salt clear from your skin. Quickly, he then takes the shot, and swallows before biting down on the lime, making a pained face as the table cheered.

His hand is still on your thigh; his grip is tight.

As he's spluttering and grinning and Felix is clapping him on the back for the effort, he's rather abashedly offering himself to you, if you'd like to repeat the same salt process on him -

"You've done enough for your first shot, Ollie," you told him with a fond nudge, happily applying salt to the back of your own hand, completing the ritual with far less fanfare. Still, when you glance past Oliver to Felix, you see the way he's regarding the newcomer, with a kind of awe and warmth. This too you know well.

Crammed so close in the booth, Felix's arm stays around Oliver's shoulders for most of the rest of the night, and while no-one can see it, Oliver's hand remains on your thigh. Sometimes he taps along to the music of the pub that you've already tuned out, sometimes he's rubbing small circles with his thumb, or give you a squeeze when he's laughing at a joke, but it never waivers.

The more drunk you become, the more you find yourself leaning into him, and you begin to tune out the conversation, focusing only on your drink, the warmth of Oliver and his hand on you, and on the sensation of Felix's hand playing with your hair since his arm was around Oliver's shoulders, and you're leaning your head against him.

Everything's become blurry, your brain is still trying to catch up after you take another shot from muscle memory alone when Farleigh starts insisting on Oliver shout the next round, and for that round to be jaeger bombs.

"We just did shots," you shake your head with a faint frown, but the movement makes you feel all kind of queasy.

"You tapping out?" Farleigh, in much better spirits considering how many he'd consumed, is all wide, challenging smiles full of teeth.

"Nope," you again shake your head, against your better judgement, "never ever ever." Everything is spinning, even with your eyes closed.

"Then you shouldn't be letting Ollie snake his way out of paying for his round," Farleigh sounds all kinds of smug, and despite how you're all kind of done with him for tonight, and Oliver is trying to insist that he's not trying to wiggle out of paying for a round, the rest of the table have apparently taken up Farleigh's crusade. They're booing him, hissing at him, while Farleigh's smugness screams social triumph; you can feel Oliver's fingers twitching on your thigh, like he wants to be fidgeting but can't bring himself to let you go.

"Fine," Oliver relents to the peer pressure, letting you go and throwing his hands in the air, "can you move a sec?" He asks, and you shuffle out to let him past, before scooting back in and back beside a once more frustrated Felix.

Farleigh argues that it's the rules of the pub when Felix asks him to give Oliver a break, but you don't really hear them. You've cleared enough space on the table in front of you to be able to cross your arms on the table, laying your head on your arms to try and see if it would help. Felix is rubbing soothing circles on your back as he argues with Farleigh, probably out of pure habit, so you try and focus on that sensation, and picking a point that you see that you can focus on.

Everything's sideways, the bar, the people, the street outside, but it doesn't matter. In the moments you find yourself focusing on Oliver in the cool light of the bar, everything else falls away. He looks antsy and uncomfortable, watching the bartender pour the shots, wallet in his hand. You'd have paid in a heartbeat if Farleigh hadn't been so insistent on attacking Oliver's pride. Everything else about him was so charmingly ordinary, perhaps that's why Farleigh was infuriated by him, and why he'd attacked Oliver's pride, one of the few things that Farleigh probably believed Oliver had of value to himself.

Tomorrow, you and Farleigh were having words.

Tonight, you wanted to somehow help Oliver without making any kind of big deal about it. Problem was, you weren't sure how. You weren't even sure if you were capable of walking in straight line right now.

"Fi -" when you turn your head to your other side, you see Felix, half finished a cigarette, with a pensive look on his face as he too was watching Oliver. When he looks at you there's a moment that the two of you share, of understanding, of compassion and a shared goal, "can you get me a glass of water?" You asked, knowing he'd take the hint. Thankfully, he smiles at you, the two of you shuffling once more so he could get out of the booth and head towards Oliver and the bar.

Leaning on the end of the booth, you wait for Felix to return before you sit back down, instead focusing on the interaction between the two men at the bar. It's not that you can hear them, but you can see the grateful but anxious look in Oliver's eyes, and the way he can't look away from Felix's smile, and something sharp and bright and intrigued lights up in your chest.

There's a moment as the interaction begins winding down, when Felix takes the tray of drinks, and looks back at your gathered group of friends. His eyes meet yours, faint flicker of familiar affection passing in the next moment as he says something else to Oliver before he's making a beeline back to the group.

"Thank you, Ollie!" He announces brightly, much to the cheer and delight of the rest of the group once the jaeger bombs are set down at the table. Caught up in the sudden influx of joy, you chant Ollie's name, clapping along, not even realising that since you'd let go of the booth you were starting to take on a lean.

"You're fucking legless," Felix crows with laughter, who had already slid back into the booth and was now taking you by the arm and sitting you back down beside himself, "I'm cutting you off, you're on the waters now," he joked, arm around you to steady you, though you weren't inclined to disagree. Thankfully, in the next moment, a water was being placed in front of you, and a cheer was once again rising from the group as Oliver rejoined you all, bashful smile on his face as everyone was lavishing praise on him for following through with buying the round.

The glass was cold and clear and faintly frosted, few ice cubes floating delicately on top of the pint of water before you, looking absolutely perfect in this golden, humid pub. Even just reaching out and holding the cold glass of water in your hands seemed to make everything a little less blurry at the edges.

As you dragged the glass towards you, surprised by your sudden craving for fresh, cold water, praise tumbles from your lips, words half blurring together, and Oliver takes his seat once more beside you.

"Ollie, you're my fucking hero."

#felix catton x reader x oliver quick #saltburn x reader #felix catton x reader #saltburn imagine #felix catton imagine #felix catton x y/n #felix catton x you #oliver quick x reader #oliver quick imagine #oliver quick x you #oliver quick x y/n #head heart hand fic #manic writer

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mulletmitsuya · 6 months ago

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Tokyo Revengers Groupchat (final timeline)

Warnings: suggestive, swearing, mentions of grooming (it's not serious), the word "pedophile"

Desc: a discussion about pride month takes a detour

Kazutora: what does pride month mean?

Kazutora: like is everyone supposed to be gay for the month or?

Mikey: yeah exactly

Mikey: basically we all have to kiss each other

Kazutora: oh

Baji: we can do a circle jerk session to start off pride

Mitsuya: Kazutora, don't ask just google it

Kazutora: what's a circle jerk session

Mitsuya: 😒

Mikey: i don't think it's necessary to go that far, Baji

Smiley: some of us, are in relationships

Baji: why did you say that as if you're the one in a relationship?

Smiley: just defending my guy Draken

Mikey: Ken-chin will you still be at pride even if you have a girlfriend

Draken: i mean, i guess.

Baji: does Emma even know you like boys

Baji: nvm she probably does. she did have to compete with Mikey for your attention so idk maybe it's obvious

Chifuyu: are you guys actually going to the pride parade? it's gonna be on tv i'm pretty sure

Chifuyu: which means people from school would see us

Chifuyu: or work

Mikey: we haven't been in school for years?

Baji: are you scared to be found out Chifuyu

Baji: bcs everyone knew in school

Baji: you made it glaringly obvious

Baji: closet made of glass and whatnot

Chifuyu: does it count as actually being gay if it's one guy tho

Chifuyu: like if i cook one time, am i chef?

Chifuyu: something to think about

Mikey: dude you're in a relationship with him, what are you talking about🤨

Takemitchy: Mikey-kun you're actually pretty famous so a lot of people would recognize you

Mikey: i'm pretty sure people know that i've tasted the rainbow

Mikey: people make edits of me and Ken-chin

Mikey: they're pretty cute

Mikey: people also write fanfiction about me

Mikey: guys do i look like a daddy dom

Mikey: serious question

Mikey: could i pull it off

Draken: what are edits?

Mikey: don't worry about it

Draken: no no, Emma was bugging me about it earlier and i had no idea what she was talking about so just tell me

Baji: search "Doramai edits"

Baji: don't know how Emma's dealing with all that

Mikey: Takemitchy are you and Hina coming

Takemitchy: can allies come?

Baji: "ally"

Baji: that's all you are??

Baji: sure

Takemitchy: ?

Draken: what the fuck is this shit

Draken: how do you report this

Draken: this is all taken out of context

Draken: Mikey you need to release a statement about this. what the fuck

Draken: i have a wife

Kazutora: guys i'm still confused

Izana: can you guys please use your own private little groupchat

Izana: no one, of the 15+ people on this group talk, but you 6

Mikey: are you and Kakucho coming to pride

Izana: stop ignoring what i just said

Mikey: do you and Kakucho explore each others bodies?

Baji: who tops?

Baji: nvm, wrong question. who doms?

Ran: if Kakucho and Izana were to be together romantically it would count as grooming

Ran: just putting that out there

Mikey: so what i'm hearing is that Izana is a PEDOPHILE🤔

Mikey: interesting

Mikey: i'm telling Shin

Izana: oh you're telling Shin? i'm so fucking scared

Izana: kill yourself

Mikey: please don't try me. i WILL do it🙏

Draken: wait are you guys actually together? cause that's an actual problem i'm pretty sure

Draken: wasn't he 14 while you were 18

Ran: i'm sorry Izana, that's my bad, didn't mean to make this a thing

Ran: and in his defense, that was 10 years ago

Rindou: 10 years of grooming

Rindou: sorry, i wanted in on the joke but it just looks bad

Mikey: Izana why aren't you defending yourself

Izana: because Kakucho and i aren't in a romantic relationship? i don't know what the fuck you guys are on about

Hakkai: didn't the Haitani's go look for Emma at her middle school when she was 13 and they were 17 because they heard rumours about Mikey's "hot" younger sister

Ran: we didn't know she was 13 😐

Rindou: she was 12, actually

Baji: why did you double down

Ran: jesus christ

Ran: 12??

Ran: we still didn't know

Chifuyu: literally all pedophiles say that

Mikey: i beg your pardon

Mikey: why were you guys looking for Emma

Rindou: people said she was hot

Rindou: those people were definitely pedophiles, yeah

Rindou: which we aren't, btw

Rindou: we saw her coming out of the sixth grade classes and realized we'd didn't get enough information

Rindou: our bad

Baji: what would Ran be doing with Emma anyway

Baji: aren't you gay

Ran: no?

Baji:

Mikey: why would you add that question mark Ran

Mikey: why are you acting suprised that people think you're gay when you act like that

Rindou: sorry Ran i can't defend you on this one

Ran: is it cause i'm flamboyant?

Draken: who describes themselves like that man

Ran: Koko's flamboyant

Ran: do you guys accuse him of homosexuality?

Ran: nvm

Chifuyu: i was about to say

Koko: well actually

Koko: i am a bisexual man

Koko: i like men and women

Koko: the man i like is inupi

Koko: we are in a relationship

Inupi: you didn't have to do all of that dude

Inupi: but thanks 👍❤

Koko: i am out and proud

Smiley: i know this is supposed to be sweet but this isn't the place to do this shit😭

Draken: are you guys going to therapy? good on you guys

Ran: didn't you like his sister?

Rindou: she died

Rindou: keeping it in the family i see. i respect it Koko

Ran: that doesn't mean what you think it means

Takemitchy: Rindou why would you say that

Smiley: the Haitani's are weird as fuck

Smiley: can we kick them out

Ran: at least we're not ugly

Rindou: and we aren't even weird

Smikey: i'm fucking adorable, don't play with me

Inupi: Akane isn't dead. what are you talking about

Rindou: the fire

Mikey: what fire😐

Mikey: the fire never happened. i made sure of it

Inupi: what?

Rindou: nvm y'all, i'm tripping

Rindou: i suddenly got a vision of Inupi with a huge scar on his face

Rindou: and his sister being dead

Ran: i told you to stop spending time with Sanzu

Ran: he's schizophrenic

Rindou: schizophrenia isn't contagious🤨?

Rindou: and i don't think he's schizophrenic i think he has autism or some shit

Ran: 2 very different mental illnesses??

Rindou: he has the evil kind

Ran: what?

Rindou: evil autism

Rindou: like he weaponizes it

Ran: that literally doesn't make sense

Rindou: it makes perfect sense, fym

Sanzu: i'm not schizophrenic?

Sanzu: or autistic?

Rindou: sure buddy

Mikey: IT'S AUTISM

Mikey: BAJI, IT'S AUTISM

Baji: what's autism?

Mikey: what's up with Haruchiyo!!

Baji: isn't he just gay?

Ran: why is that your conclusion to everything?

Ran: i'm starting to think you're the gay one

Baji: i've never denied that🤨?

Ran: oh

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moonlit-imagines · 23 days ago

Text

Headcanons for being Hank McCoy’s sibling

Hank McCoy x sibling!reader

warnings:

a/n: i started writing this fic months ago and when i was halfway done mobile glitched and deleted the whole draft so i gave up out of rage anyways. i dont think i liked how it turned out but idk!

prompt: anonymous: “Hellooo !! First of all i have to say that i love your fics !! Second of all , i wanted to request a headcanon , with being hank mccoy’s little sister?? I was thinking that she is a mutant and she has powers like Wanda. It would be really cool to see is with the other x men. Also her age to be around 14 when the first movie sets place ?( Sorry if i didn’t explain it well)”

being a mutant who had just discovered their powers was hard

what was even harder was that your brother hank had to take you in when it happened

hank understood what it felt like to be different, and luckily he had a good enough job to support you

“just sit here and do your homework. quietly” -hank, seating you in his office at work

“what makes you think i wont be quiet?” -you

“you blew up the toaster this morning” -hank

“it burnt my toast” -you

“listen, okay? no one can no we are what we are. just be calm. if you need help on your homework, let me know” -hank

you spent a lot of time at hank’s work, which led to you two immediately being exposed by charles xavier when he waltzed into your lives

“oh, dear, you’ve just experienced your mutation recently. you’re a powerful one, but you can’t control it well. we can help with that” -charles

he quickly realized it was a mistake to comment on yours and your brother’s…issues

“no! no, y/n, it’s too dangerous. you’re in middle school, you have homework. im not letting him turn you into a soldier” -hank

if you couldn’t tell by now, hank was a bit anxious about raising you

after all, your powers weren’t much alike, he didn’t know how to navigate this

“i need to learn how to control them, or else im gonna hurt someone” -you

you didn’t understand what it felt like to look different, but he didn’t understand what it felt like to fear yourself

“who’s the kid?” -alex

“that’s my sibling, y/n” -hank

“what’s your power?” -alex

“it’s kind of…uncontrollable. i can’t show you” -you

“i know how that feels” -alex

“you do?!” -you

when alex finally revealed his power, it made you excited to show your energy blasts

you managed to keep them mostly contained and alex gave you a huge high five

“stay away from him, y/n. he’s not a good influence” -hank

“but we have similar powers. im not alone!” -you

“doesn’t mean you need to be friends” -hank

the rest of the gang was super sweet to you, but you had to remind them you were young, not little

“you’re probably the strongest out of all of us, kiddo” -raven

sean liked to pretend like you were super scary and cower whenever you looked at him

“no please dont hurt me!!!” -sean, convincingly but sarcastically

you became everyone’s little sibling

“admit it, we’ve never been closer” -you

“yeah, you’re right” -hank

“and we aren’t so lonely” -you

“that’s also true” -hank

“so why are you acting so protective and jealous” -you

“im just used to it being us two” -hank

“yeah but now we aren’t struggling, we have all this space to move around and time to focus on important things. i can finally use my powers without getting scared!” -you

“are you still keeping up with your schoolwork?” -hank

“stop worrying so much, hank” -you

regardless of his protests, you still geared up to fight and it infuriated him

what infuriated you was that he was blue

“what. the hell. did you do?” -you

“im the adult here, why are you in that suit. y/n’s not going on this mission. and watch your language!” -hank

you nearly gave him a heart attack, but by the end of the fight he was proud of you. truly.

for a short time, the remainer of the team stayed together

alex and you trained together often

“hey! only i can bully hank” -you

“oh, you’re making rules now?” -alex

“i am the boss around here” -you

charles admired how far you’d come

and hank was honestly grateful he wasn’t raising you alone

you continued your schooling and just as you graduated, charles offered you a job teaching at the school for gifted youngsters

but it shortly closed after that, leaving you without much of a purpose

“hank, i think i need to go off on my own” -you

“it’s too dangerous, y/n. you’re much better off here” -hank

“you mean with you and charles? two of the most self-hating mutants i know? charles is injecting himself with medication to stop his powers. medication YOU made. how long until you make one for me so im not so ‘dangerous’ anymore” -you

“what could you possibly do out there?” -hank

“i already got a job as a teacher, hank. i’m off to go live my life. call me if you need me” -you

he did call you later, rambling about a mutant from the future preventing a war or something. just that you needed to come back

“y/n, good to see you” -logan

“do i know you?” -you

“apparently he knows all of us” -charles

“thats not weird” -you, sarcastically

it’d been a while since you’d seen any action, so it was a little refreshing doing something like breaking into the pentagon

“after this, maybe we could go out sometime” -peter

“get away from them!” -hank

“i got this hank—kid, i’m too old for you” -you

“you’re barely five years older than me” -peter

“you’re seventeen. go away.” -you

you and hank laughed about it later

really, it was weird seeing erik and raven again. even charles with his shit together. it was like old times

you just wished it could stick

you left before any more damage could be done to your personal life and gave hank a big hug

“be safe. don’t do anything stupid” -you

“hey, thats what i was gonna say” -hank

you went back to your life and soon got a call from charles

a job offer, the school was opening again

“come home, y/n. hank misses you” -charles

it took some convincing, but you came back

and maybe this time things would be different

you got your classes and were ready to start teaching a new generation of mutants the way you wished you were taught

(sorry i cut this short i ran out of ideas 😭)

taglist: @locke-writes // @randomawesomeperson102 // @captainshazamerica // @dindjarinsspouse // @summersimmerus // @simp-legend // @nekoannie-chan // @groovy-lady // @deanzboyfriend // @mr-mxyzptlk-1940 //

#hank mccoy #hank mccoy x reader #hank mccoy imagine #xmen #xmen x reader #xmen imagine #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine

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iouinotes · 7 months ago

Text

All for you | Carl Gallagher

pairing: Carl Gallagher x female!reader

show: Shameless

warnings: angst, fluff, smut (the reader and Carl are 18 years old in this ff)

summary: Carl is challenged that he can get your money, if he makes you fall in love with him. He loves the challenge until he loves something else more...

authors note: sorry for so many pov switched, I didnt notice it, when I first wrote this ff. Also I haven't had the chance to watch all the seasons yet, but I still hope that Carl's character is somewhat accurate :))

Carl's pov

"Frank, goddamit youre no help! Why are you even lying around here - oh forget it, I don't want to hear it." Fiona's voice echoes in the room, while the entire Gallagher household is present.

The everyday discussion has been going on for too many minutes in which I could have done something better. The damn question “How do we get enough money?”

Lip at college, Ian with his gangster boyfriend, my shitty sister with her kid and then Liam. This family is screwed. No wonder with a father like Frank.

As the argument continues to escalate, I have the misfortune of sitting right next to him.

"You care to share some money, son?" Of course, my attempts to ignore him are unsuccessful.

"The drug trade doesn't always work out so well, but the weapon thing was something. You could give one to your good old dad, you know what the neighborhood is like." I run my hands through my hair in frustration, shaking my head.

"Just get one or two girls pregnant at school, then all of our problems are solved. But she has to be rich. After all, you want to get your hard work paid." Why the hell am I still here?

"You used to be more enthusiastic about my ideas. If you don't want to do play daddy, then use your charm. When I was your age, my cock was enough and the girls were happy."

"Be fucking quiet, no one wants to hear about your pathetic youth." It's no use, he keeps talking.

"I'm only saying, If you make a rich girl fall in love with you, then you can get money to do something nice for your family."

As I get up and walk away from him I take a breath, the tension caused by this idiot sucks.

Still, his words got me thinking. Maybe there's a new girl who would be perfect for this job...

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

When I moved here, I wasn't sure what to expect. New school, maybe mean classmates and bad cafeteria food. That I might be able to join a group and make friends, people who laugh with me in class or go to the cinema together on weekends.

I was prepared to get lost in the hallways a few times, perhaps to be peppered with embarrassing questions by the teachers. I had even prepared myself for being called a nerd again and therefore spending my lunch breaks alone.

Then things turned out differently. I met two girls who, although they scared me at first with their need to gossip all the time, are good people at heart.

They studied with me (meaning they told me the newest gossip and braided my hair while I did our homework), showed me the city and its pitfalls. I felt comfortable, prepared and confident for what awaited me here.

Oh lord, was I wrong.

On a Thursday in the middle of the week I met a boy who messed everything up. Literally.

I met him when he was running through the halls twenty minutes late, but stupidly didn't pay attention to me, who was about to cross his path. Let's put it this way, it ended with my books on the floor, my jacket hanging off my shoulder, and his hair being a huge mess.

When he looked at me, I expected to hear something like "sorry" or "I'll help you."

You want to know what he said?

"Cute top. Let me know if you need help taking it off."

Then he got up casually and walked into the classroom across the hallway, a grin on his face as if he had won the Bachelor title.

After this encounter two things became very clear to me. 1. Look both ways when crossing the halls and 2. Stop daydreaming about this boy, even if he has beautiful blue eyes.

The first thing worked better than the second.

After a few descriptions, which actually only consisted of "incredibly impudent and incredibly good-looking", it was explained to me who I was dealing with.

Carl Gallagher. A boy who has lived here since he was born, someone who is rumoured to be more dangerous than the Italian Mafia.

Even though I thought that was exaggerated, I quickly realized that I should stay away from him and that he meant trouble.

Aside from the fact that I wasn't going to be in the situation of talking to him again anyway, my eyes couldn't stop themselves from looking at him.

There was something that defined him, something that made me want to watch a grin creep across his face when he made an inappropriate joke, how he would push his blonde hair back and his eyes would shine mischievously, as if he had already planned the next bank robbery.

I wasn't the only one who found his charisma attractive tho, of course not when he looked like one of God's angels, but he never really seemed interested in other girls. At least not with any serious intent, you might hear him flirting or making comments about his free bed, but you would never saw him in a relationship.

He never held hands or kissed anyone, had a real smile on his face or said sweet things, he was just Carl.

Suggestive, hot-tempered and like a flag that proclaimed: Stay away from me, because you will lose this fight.

I also felt that if I continued to watch him, I would lose the battle for platonic feelings towards him too.

"Please don't tell me you're looking at our school bad boy again. You better be careful, he might want to sell you a gun." Kenzie's voice makes me sigh.

"These are just rumors. Besides, it's not my fault, he's just -" Her hand on my shoulder interrupts me.

"We know, you have heart eyes every time you talk about him. There are so many great guys in this world, I'm not saying at this school, but you choose this one?" Her look says more than a thousand words as she looks over at Carl, who is pushing his way trough the crowd.

"I'm not in love, just curious. Those are two different things, okay?" Her eyebrows raise.

"You mean, curious how his lips would feel on yours?" Her laughter at my expression is lost in the sounds of the cafeteria.

"Very funny." I murmur to her, food forgotten on my plate. When the school bell rings, I stand up and pick up my backpack.

"My class is canceled now, but I'm going to the library. Will you meet me later?" As I walk backwards I see her thumbs up and the hearts she makes in Carl's direction. My reaction is two quick middle fingers.

As I walk out of the school building, I check my phone and tie my hair into a braid. The library is a few blocks away and the cool air makes me shiver.

When I get there and wave to the boy at the entrance, I turn to my favorite department. Call it cliche, but I love romance books. I mean, I don't know what it feels like to love someone with all my heart, but that doesn't mean I don't love reading about it.

The books I actually need are a few rows away. History, literature, everything I am assigned to get for school.

As I stroke over a few tapes and finally pull out a book to read the first few pages, I hear a noise next to me that makes me look up. After all, the library is usually a pretty quiet place.

As I look into the familiar blue eyes, I feel my cheeks turn red.

I have to stop myself from staring.

"Always a book in your hand, I see." Oh his voice hasn't changed. I try to shrug casually as I answer, but I'm not sure if it actually works.

"Aren't you going to be late for class again?" At my sarcasm he smiles, he takes a step in my direction which weakens my control over my voice.

"I thought I would learn something somewhere else too." These coded words make me swallow.

"So, you're here often?" I almost think he's not answering me, but maybe I'm just not concentrating, because I'm paying too much attention to every mole on his face.

"Actually, I didn't even know this shitty town had a library." His words make me laugh, but several requests to be quiet around us, make me whisper in response.

"Then why are you here?" I think my breathing stops as his hand brushes my fingers that are still holding the book.

"You're here." I feel my heart beating nervously faster, I probably look pretty confused and when I notice his grin, something flutters in my chest.

"No interest in books, huh?" Can my answer actually be any lamer?

"Dont worry, I have a newfound interest in you."

🔗🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

If someone had told me a few weeks ago that I would become friends with Carl Gallagher, I would have found the idea absolutely crazy. To be honest, I still find the situation insane, but damn my cheeks still turn just as red when he's with me as they did the first time.

It turns out that he really has no interest in books, even though he visited me at the library almost every day since we met in the romance department.

I've never met anyone like him, funny and couragous without any reserve, always looking for trouble, acting self-confident. But also sweet.

He's like a current that pulls you along, like a wind that blows so hard that you fly with it. He feels like freedom and it is wonderful.

He makes me laugh, he carries my books, plays with my hair, walks home with me. In such a short time I feel like he didn't knock on the doors to my heart, instead he made a home there.

Maybe this is what it feels like to fall in love.

It's not a gentle announcement, more of a realization that makes you incredibly desperate and happy at the same time.

But with him I actually just feel happy.

"Ready, sunshine?" As soon as I come out of the classroom, he comes towards me and takes my bag from me. My heart jumps at his gesture, which feels like winning the Olympics.

"You're crazy, where do you even want to go?" He has something planned but won't tell me. When he puts his arm around my shoulder and I lean against him, I get a few sideways glances from our classmates.

Carl ignores everyone like always, it's crazy but the way he's so confident is pretty attractive to me.

"Does the guy in your cheesy books also tell you where they go on dates? I bet not, so just wait."

🔗🔗🔗🔗

"It feels like you're kidnapping me."

I feel his smile on my back and have to giggle quietly at his response.

"Mh, I plan to do that. But only for a few hours, otherwise my head will roll tomorrow. Your father takes your curfew pretty seriously."

I feel his hands on my hips, guiding me forward, hear the birds chirping around us, but can't figure out where we're going.

"Just a few more steps, baby. Then you'll see." As he promised, it is only a few meters away and when I see a small, calm lake, my mouth falls open in surprise.

"Carl, oh my God! It's wonderful here, thank you so much." I turn around in his grip and look at him, his smile reflects the love that I feel.

"Yeah? How much do you like it?" As his eyes focus on my lips, I feel a tingling feeling in my stomach. Slowly, my fingers stroke his chest and I see him swallow, even though he tries to hide it.

"I think it's incredibly beautiful here, I love it. And...I really like you." I shyly lower my gaze, my words are met with an unknown silence that makes me anxious after a few seconds. But when I look up at him again, he pushes a strand of my hair out of my face.

"To me, you are much more beautiful than this sight. I like you too and I thought that was pretty obvious." I smile broadly, butterflies fly around in my stomach and as the sun illuminates his face, I feel incredibly happy.

"You're so nice to me, I don't know how I deserve this." An expression crosses his face, but when I blink he smiles at me again.

"After all, you are the first person who explained the topics for the history exam to me, without giving up." My hand cups his cheek.

"I wouldn't give you up, you've become too important to me." As I stand on my tiptoes, our lips brush, his hand is on my back and pushes me closer to him.

"You are an angel." With his words we kiss and everything else around us blurs, only he remains. Everything is unimportant except him, standing in front of me, so handsome, that it is difficult not to look at him.

"Come on, let's go for a swim." As he pulls me towards the lake, you can hear our loud laughter in the air.

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Carl's pov

"When are you going to collect the money? You've been with her for the last three months and nothing has come of it." Frank's annoying voice frustrates me more than anything else.

"I am working on it. Besides, she's actually really caring." When I see the dismissive hand gesture in my direction, I roll my eyes.

"You are completely wrong, son. A person is there for a certain period of time, but money? Money accompanies you throughout your life, especially if you buy beautiful bottles of the best alcohol."

I sink into the sofa, but want to turn away when I feel his hand on my shoulder.

"If you put it off any longer, it will be harder to get out of the situation. Girls your age will start planning to get married, if you stay with them for months."

But when he leaves, I feel conflicted. Can I really do this to her?

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Carl's pov

"Happy birthday!" Her voice makes me jump and, confused, I turn around on the bench to look into her excited eyes.

"Why are you jumping around like that? Are you practicing for cheerleading?" I'm making fun of her, but the smile on her face doesn't fade.

"No, idiot. I'm just really curious to see how you react to your gift." My breath catches for a moment as I take in her words.

"You got me something?" When she leans forward and gives me a kiss on the cheek while pressing the bag into my lap, I start to smile too.

"Open!" Her encouragement breaks me out of my trance and I quickly tear up the paper, looking at the tickets with wide eyes.

"But...these tickets cost a fortune? Did you sell your liver or something?" When I look at her, she smiles back at me.

"I talked to my dad and he agreed that you deserve something special for your birthday. Are you happy?" As I look at the cards, I suddenly feel a pang in my heart. It must be showing on my face, because her happiness is also fading away.

"Do you not like it? I thought it was your favorite team? I can get you something else." When I look at her, I quickly pull her between my legs and kiss her.

"Shh, breathe angel. It's perfect, thank you. And well, your father. It's just a lot of money." Her hands play with the fabric of my shirt.

"You always say that. Do you have problems at home, with money, I mean? I've never been to your place, I don't even know where you live." What should I say to her now?

"It's okay." Her raised eyebrows look at me reproachfully, making me sigh.

"Each of us has to contribute a certain amount of money every month and if I don't sell fucking drugs, it will be tight." Her astonished look makes me pause and I gently stroke her arms.

Before I can say anything else, she kisses me. I look at her in surprise.

"What's that for?" She smiles shyly, looks at the floor for a moment before looking at me again.

"You're just so honest, I admire that. And that you've never asked me for anything, you know. That I lend you some money."

Fuck. Shit. What do I say?

"Yeah, I mean, I don't want to burden you with that-" but she interrupts me again, her concentrated expression makes me curious.

"What's going on in your pretty head?" My hands wander over her sides.

"It's the end of the month, how much are you missing?" I frown in confusion, but when she doesn't let it go, I tell her the amount.

"$240, the rest I earned by helping in the neighborhood." But despite the high sum, she just nods, looks at me again and gives me another kiss.

"Okay, maybe I'll be your sugar mommy." I have to laugh at the absurdity, but the longer she grins at me, the more I think she means it.

"What, are you serious? Thats fucking crazy, how am I supposed to pay you back?" Her eyes look around, but since the classroom is relatively empty during recess, she finds herself between my legs again. She slowly lets her hand wander down my stomach until she squeezes my cock through my clothes and I close my eyes in delight.

"Hmm, maybe you could help me relax between classes." Her eyes sparkle mischievously and I look at her with a grin.

"Anything you want, sugar."

Let's put it this way, the next few weeks the breaks were filled with kissing in the back corner of the classroom, dry humping on the toilet or Carl doing his best to pleasure me with his tongue in the caretaker's room, like now.

"Ahh-, Carl. I'll cum if you keep that up." His head has disappeared under my skirt, his fingers are stroking the bare skin of my thigh and the sinful movements of his tongue are making me see stars.

As he adds a finger and runs it over my folds, slowly until he inserts it, he looks at me again.

"You coming for me? Yeah, be a good girl or do you want to get caught by the old janitor grandpa spreading your legs for me?" As my eyes roll back, he pumps another finger into me, scissoring it thoroughly and hitting that sweet spot inside me.

When I moan loudly, he grins.

"You like that? Just wait until I bury my cock in you and you cant walk straight afterwards, so that everyone will notice." When his finger presses my clitoris, I see white and as I come I try to muffle the sounds with my hand over my mouth.

When I get off my high, I blindly search for my panties. But Carl beats me first.

"Hmm, no. I think I'll keep it as a little souvenir. Maybe you can get it back when you come to my house later." I don't know what surprises me more: that he wants me to run around exposed at school or that I'm invited to his house for the first time.

"Really? I'd like to come." But he interprets my words differently, his fingers stroke my entrance again and I moan and squeeze my eyes shut.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it. Very well and for a very long time." When the bell rings, he lets go of me and I whimper slightly.

"Carl-" but he interrupts me by pulling back and straightening my skirt.

"I'm sure our agreement was between recess, now it's class time. Come on, I'll make it up to you later."

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

As we ride the bus toward his home, I take his hand and intertwine our fingers.

"But don't expect a mansion or any of that shit." Ever since we left school, he has been bad-mouthing his hometown every free minute he has.

"Don't worry, I'll only have eyes for you anyway." The statement makes him laugh and he relaxes a little. As we get out and walk a little way along the street, we are watched by a few people.

"Why are so many people staring at us?" When he look at me, I'm obviously confused.

"Not everyone here wears designer clothes that cost several thousand dollars. If you come here more often, they'll call you a princess." Giggling, I slap him on the arm and as we climb the stairs to his house, I look around curiously.

"So this is where you grew up." His shoulders shrug casually, but I see him trying to gauge my reaction.

"Yeah, where in the world could it be nicer?" I laugh at his sarcastic comment and we both smile at each other as we enter the house.

I hear him calling into the house, then a girl with red hair appears, carrying a baby.

"You must be Debbie, the little one is so adorable." When I hold out my hand, she just looks at Carl with her eyebrows still raised.

"What did you do to end up with her? Also my daughter's name is Franny and yes, I know condoms exist." Surprised, I don't know exactly how to answer, so I leave it to Carl.

"My tongue is magic, Debs. Too bad you won't find out yourself anytime soon, Derek has moved away. By the way, Franny seems hungry." I'm unsure of the dynamic between the two of them, as she turns away and walks away, I resist the urge to say goodbye.

"That was...nice." His hand pulling me towards the stairs distracts me.

"She's a real ray of sunshine, come on. The others aren't back yet, so you can be as loud as you want this time."

When we get upstairs, he leads me into his room and I look at the magazines, posters and little things scattered everywhere.

"Cleaning and you are definitely not friends, huh?" I laugh at my joke, but Carl has other plans than letting me inspect his room.

He puts his hands on my hips and pushes me against the closed door, my breath catches as his eyes find mine.

"Do you want to keep playing housemaid? Then put on a damn maid costume, otherwise keep your eyes on me." At his stern voice, I press my thighs together and, grinning, I drag my fingers across his chest once again.

"Would you like that? Me on the floor, my ass in the air, and no underwear? Oh wait, what a coincidence that I'm not wearing any now either." His eyebrows raise, I see his eyes darken with lust.

"Let's save this little fantasy for another time, right now I just want to see you on my cock." Smiling, I lean towards him and start kissing him. I loosen the belt I bought him and pull him closer to me by his waistband.

"I think I did well today. After all, I didn't complain about getting through the school day without underwear. Do I get my reward now?" Grinning, he takes off my top and looks at my lace bra.

"Everything you want." He drops to his knees in front of me and kisses his way along my thighs, lifts my skirt and presses a kiss to my folds. Slowly he moves his tongue higher and kisses my stomach, I lean my head against the door.

"Does that feel good?" I just nod, burying my hand in his hair as he puts his mouth on me again.

"Ahh- Carl, I want you now." His fingers stretch me, the wetness running down my legs, making me tremble.

"You got me, sweetheart. What do you want me to do?" His head lifts to look at me and I place my fingers around his chin, seeing the moisture on his lips.

"I've been prepared enough, I want your dick now. Let's see if it's as magical as your tongue." Grinning, he stands up and lifts me up, lays me on my back on his bed and lies down between my legs.

He places a few kisses on my legs, then stretches up on his elbows so he's hovering over me. Then he kisses my cheek and my lips, lets his tongue slide over them and lets me taste myself.

I run my fingers through his blonde hair and pull his body closer to me. When he pulls a condom out of his pocket, I hold my breath.

"You still want to do this?" His look calms all the worries I had. I nod, stroking my fingers over his heated cheek.

"I trust you." His next kiss is passionate, his hands gliding over my body, caressing every bit of exposed skin. I lift my back off the mattress and let him take off my bra. His head lowers to run his tongue over my navel. As he sucks on them, I moan softly.

One of his hands starts kneading my breasts and when I try to take off my skirt, he stops me.

"Leave it on, okay?" I kiss him in response.

His hand strokes my sides and my own hands rest on his shoulders as he presses the tip of his cock against my entrance.

"Ready, baby?" When I agree, he presses himself into me and for a moment I have to squint my eyes because it hurts.

Then I feel several gentle kisses on my cheek, my forehead and my lips. His attempts to distract me work and as I become more and more relaxed, he slides further into me.

Slowly he presses his hips against me, the stretch so great that I can feel him all the way into my stomach. He waits for a moment, whispering sweet things in my ears until they get dirty and I beg him to move.

My hands wrap around his shoulders as he thrusts into me for the first time, the air around us thickening as he grunts and a moan escapes me.

"You're doing so well, God, you feel so good." His hips move faster and faster, the pleasure spreads through my body and the wetter I feel, the easier he slides in and out of me.

"You are perfect, my perfect girl. Do you feel good?" His hands stroke my skin, gently pinching my nipples, playing with them and making me squirm beneath him.

As he grips my hips and pushes himself harder into me, my head starts to spin. My noises get louder.

"Carl- god, please go harder" And so he does, the room is filled with the sounds of our bodies and sweat forms on us.

"Baby, do you want to ride me? You have such pretty thighs." I nod and when he pulls out of me I can't think clearly, I just want him to fill me up again.

He leans back and as I stabilize myself on his shoulders, I sink back onto him. The feeling is even better that my eyes roll back. His hands grasp my hips, helping me move.

"That's right, baby. You're doing so good, riding my cock like the good girl you are." At his words, I tighten my grip on him and he curses as I move harder on top of him.

The faster I go, the more exhausting it becomes, but as I feel a knot forming in my stomach, I ride him so fast just to chase my pleasure.

Then suddenly as he hits my spot inside me over and over again, I go boneless on him and melt in his arms. My come drips all over him and as he continues to fuck me, reaching his own climax, I tremble in his grip.

"Just a few more thrusts, baby. Ah, keep holding on to me." Even though I have lost my strength, I move on him a few more times until he comes and I lay my head on his shoulder.

We're both breathing heavily, but everything feels so good, so warm and comfortable, that I don't want to move a single muscle anymore.

He carefully pulls out of me, I moan slightly at the loss. He gently lays me back on his pillow and gives me a kiss before throwing the condom away.

He pulls the blanket over us and puts his arm around me to pull me closer. I snuggle up to him and feel so safe that I quickly press my lips to his skin.

"That was wonderful." He also presses a kiss on my hair.

"That was incredible, you are the best. I can't wait to do it again." Our embrace becomes tighter. For a moment the room is silent.

When I whisper his name, he hums in response.

"I know it's cliche to say something like that after the first time. But I just feel it so much that it hurts to keep it to myself. I love you." As I lie on his chest I hear his heart stop for a moment and then it starts beating much faster.

"I- no one has ever said that to me before." When I raise my head and look at him, he doesn't look at me. Instead, his eyes are fouced on the ceiling.

"I just want you to know. I don't want to put any pressure on you to say it. I just thought you should hear it. You know, now that things are serious between us." Again he is silent and I start to worry, but then he looks at me.

"You are truly the most incredible person I have ever met. I consider myself very lucky." He smiles at me, then leans down and we kiss for a moment. It feels like heaven.

We lay there for a few minutes, just cuddling and telling each other how our day was. We laugh and as the sun slowly sets, I start to get dressed.

"I wish I could stay here with you. But you know what my parents are like." He leans back on his elbow, watching me get dressed and contact my parents to pick me up.

"Hmm, I think we would do it again. If you stayed here tonight, I mean." I smile at him, sit down on his bed for a moment and ruffle his hair.

"I wouldn't mind, darling." The nickname makes him blush and when he leans forward to kiss me, I playfully push him away.

"I have to go, are you coming down with me?" He nods, feigning annoyance, and as we walk out of his room, he puts his arm around my waist and pulls me towards him.

He steals his kiss there, but more than that he steals my heart.

We smile at each other and for this moment everything is just perfect. We go downstairs and just as we are back in the living room we hear a door open loudly.

A visibly drunk man stumbles in. I see Carl tense up next to me, staring at the stranger angrily. I quietly lean towards him to whisper my question.

"Who is that?" When he rolls his eyes, I get a bad feeling.

"That's my father, great isn't it?" The man in front of me is dirty, has unkempt hair and an unpleasant smile on his face.

"Should I ask my parents if you can stay overnight?" My gaze is more focused on the man than on Carl.

But he just shakes his head, and just as he is about to answer, the man sees us too.

"Oh, my son! It's so good to see you, not really, but I'll take your bed. Fiona has mine. Is that your little girlfriend? She looks expensive, very good catch. How much money did you rip her off? I hope it's worth it to go through all this drama." I frown in confusion, but when Carl freezes next to me, I become uncertain.

"What does he mean by that?" This time my gaze is directed solely at Carl.

"Nothing, he's drunk-" but before he can finish, the man does.

"How rude of me, I am Frank. The proud father of this child, at least one of my descendants has made something of himself and used his talent. He has my good genes, the good looks and I teach him the tricks. Like exploiting an innocent, very very rich girl for money. It doesn't bother you, I hope? You seem to have enough, but I hope my son returns the favor to you."

The words catch me so off guard that I can't move. I don't believe anything this man says until I see the guilty look on Carl's face.

"W-what? That's a lie, right? Tell me he's lying, Carl." As he runs his hands through his hair and tries to answer me, Frank speaks again.

"Oh, you haven't confessed to her yet? My fault, I should have waited. I didn't think you would humiliate this girl for so long. I told you this wouldn't end well." But Carl ignores him completely when he notices me moving away from him.

"Wait, I'm sorry. It wasn't like that-" But I interrupt him, already feeling tears gathering in my eyes.

"So what happened? You act like you don't want any money from me and-" Carl's look becomes frustrated.

"You offered me your money! You said if I matched it, everything would be fine for you." I'm almost speechless, is this all a nightmare?

"Are you serious? I offered it to you because you weren't asking for it. And now I find out it was your plan from the beginning? You just talked to me, just spent time with me to get my money? Who does that?" Frank's voice intervenes.

"I invented the strategy, my dear. It's turning out to be quite useful." But I don't pay attention to him, I just look at Carl.

"Please, I'm sorry. Yes, it was meant that way in the beginning, but it's different now. I-" My tears flow when he admits it and any feeling of happiness disappears. All that remains is betrayal and sadness.

"You what? What am I saying, you were probably happy that I only wanted you in return. I'm such an idiot. You didn't just take my money, you took my first time too!" As he comes towards me, I step back.

"Listen to me, I didnt force you to do all this for me. You wanted it." The more he talks the more desperate I feel and the greater my anger becomes.

"You idiot! I thought you liked me! I thought you finally noticed me too." My sobs get louder and my vision blurs. When he tries to grab my face, I slap him.

"My cue to go. I can see that you're sorting it out between yourselves just fine." Frank's footsteps fading away are nothing compared to the sound of my heart breaking.

"I like you, I really like you. At first it wasn't my intention to start a relationship with you, but then I got to know you and-" Every word that escapes him is only worse.

"Stop talking! You know what the worst thing is that I liked you for so long before you even talked to me. And I thought it was a miracle when you first spoke to me in the libary. I should have listened to the others, you only care about yourself!" I wipe the tears from my cheeks, wishing I could be anywhere but here.

Then before he can say anything, I turn around and run out of the house. But I hear him following me.

"Wait! Don't just walk away, I have to get this straight. Hey!" He catches me, turns me around and holds my tear-stained face in his hands.

"I'm an idiot, I know that. I'm sorry for hurting you. I- God, I love you. You hear me? I love you too. Please stay." But I just shake my head and try to free myself from his grip.

"How do I know if that isn't a lie too? You've betrayed me, I can't talk to you now." When my car pulls up, I get in without turning around. I don't look back, even though his loud curse can be heard throughout the whole neighborhood.

🔗🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

I spend the next few days without saying much, but I cried almost the whole time.

I miss him incredibly, not a day has gone by in the last few months when I haven't seen him and now I've been alone for three days.

I wish he was here, but on the other hand I am so hurt and feel terrible. He is the reason for this.

I wish I had never found out. I wish he had never done it, never lied to me. Didn't use me for money, but worst of all, I don't know if he even likes me.

Today is the first day that I go back to school. Even though I put on make-up, choose a nice outfit and listen to my favorite songs to distract myself, I can only think of him.

His blonde hair, his beautiful eyes, the way his lips felt. How he felt inside me. Then I remember that he loves me and how he finally said it, something I have wanted to hear for so long.

But then I think about what he did and everything feels empty again.

As I enter the school, my friends come to meet me. They already know what happened, they all hug me and I feel a little better.

Until I see him.

And he sees me too. It takes all my effort to avert my gaze. To get my books out of my cupboard, but then I have to stop because he is not standing next to me offering to carry them.

I take it myself, close my door, but before I can go any further, he is standing in front of me. My heart stops. Oh, how his eyes shine.

"Do you need help?" His eyes focus on the books and I have to swallow several times before I can answer.

"No, I have to go to class now." But as I try to walk past him, he stops me.

"You don't answer my texts, you don't call me back. I'm not allowed into your house and you avoid me at school. What can I do? Please tell me what I need to do, so you forgive me." I laugh, but it is without humor.

"What can you do? Move."

I can see his shock, but he still doesn't step aside.

"Can't you hear me? I said-" but he walks toward me until I'm forced to lean my back against the lockers.

His eyes find mine.

"I can't sleep. And when I do, I dream of you. There's a - a hole in my heart that only you can fill. It hurts and I hate not being with you. It's even worse to be here, when you don't look at me the way you usually do. You don't smile at me, God, you don't look like you're in love with me anymore. It's hell."

Tears gather in my eyes, his words are so desperate, it hurts to see him like this.

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you took advantage of me. Before you slept with me." A tear runs down my cheek and I know my mascara is smudging.

"I know, I know. And I feel so bad, I'll do anything to make it right. Just tell me."

When I look into his eyes, my heart also hurts.

"Move, Carl. I can't see you now." This time he lets go of me and I go to class with tears in my eyes.

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

It's been four weeks since we last spoke, but it doesn't hurt any less to see him. Even if I don't let him talk to me, he doesn't give up.

He puts flowers in my locker, chocolate, and notes full of apologies and sweet promises.

Everything warms my heart, but it still feels like this money thing is unresolved between us. I know now that he likes me, very much in fact, as he makes it clear, but that doesn't change the real problem.

That he used me for my money.

As I leave school that day, I feel exhausted and, as I often do, I wish I had his arms around me.

Holding me tight, his lips kissing me, loving me.

As I wait for my father's car, I suddenly hear his familiar throat clearing. With my heart pounding, I turn around and see him smiling uncertainly at me.

"I know what I had to do and now I've done it. Here." He gives me an envelope and I take it uncertainly.

"Carl, your letters are flattering, but-" He quickly interrupts me.

"No, it's something else. Open it." The deja vu hits me unexpectedly and I slowly open the envelope, the content leaves me speechless.

"What is that supposed to be?" It's rhetorical, but I ask anyway.

"All the money I owe you. What you've kindly given me, I pay it back. Every cent. You can count." He looks so proud, I almost have to laugh.

"How- did you rob a bank?" He grins contentedly at my reaction.

"An old grandma." This time I laugh and he comes closer to me, slowly taking my hands.

"No, seriously. How did you do that?" He looks at me lovingly.

"Working in the kitchen every day after school, I found a part-time job with Fiona. The payment is bad, but it was worth it. I understand that money was the problem and well, that I wasn't honest to you." As I lower the envelope, we look at each other.

"Promise, no more secrets?"

He smiles and suddenly the world is a brighter place.

"Promise, but we continue one of our agreements." I raise my eyebrows questioningly, seeing him grin as he leans toward me, his breath brushing against my lips and he whispers:

"I'll still spend my breaks with you in the janitor's room."

The laughter that escapes me gets interrupted, when his lips meet mine.

#carl gallagher #shameless #x reader #love #smut #betrayal #love confessions #angst with a happy ending #angst

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gojicorps · 3 months ago

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I've been trying to make this post for a while... This is my OC "master post"

This is Ltw, if you dig stories of super heroes with a bunch of teenager drama and high school tropes, this isn't the story for you! Sorry, but this gender is already really saturated so I tried to mix and match different tropes across the medias to create a weird love letter to Comics, Tokusatsu and anything that I really enjoy. It's a coming of age story about Hart Lee Valentine, who chose to left his father house to live with his uncle in a city called Saint Expedite, famous for crimes, urban legends and some of the worst pizza you can ever imagine, an absolute paradise for someone who really wants to have a fresh restart in life.

The cast consists mainly of this 5 characters.

Hart Lee Valentine: He's the son of the smartest man alive... But this is just a media claim, his father helped cure one of the weirdest illness know to mankind. But that doesn't matter at all, Valentine is already living under the shadow of his only parent alive (wink, wink) he starts as a calm and collected person but gradually starts loosing his manners, becoming an unhinged not so crazy science. He has an odd sense of justice but he's MOSTLY a pacifist who will try to talk before throwing hands around.

His favorite animals are moths and ducks, dor different reasons, in his opinion moths are our saviours from the monstrosities called butterflies. And ducks because he loves how versatile they are, he identifies with that Jack of all trades style.

Sadako Atsuko: She's the local emo weirdo girl of the class, nobody knows much about her and her brother Helis, they live together in a mansion in the middle of the city, she's always tired, not in the best mood and usually sassy. People don't know but she's actually heiress of The Atsuko family, one of Japan's most advance tech companies, she's also a city vigilant who uses fear to stop crime... Yeah she's basically my universe version of the Batman, her character is driven by masks and alter egos, she feels incapable of leading a normal life since she's shattered between personas, not knowing who's the real her, not knowing how to express her true self. Those burdens started to get louder to the point she started playing instruments, as a therapy, but this basically turned into another problem, her days are getting too short to accomplish all her desires.

Her favorite animal is the bat, the long eared ones! So yeah she's basically using a fursuit to fight crime.

Helis: Sadako's adoptive brother, he's basically the group heart, trying to make their maniacal schemes be a little more unhinged, he's the protector and the tallest one of them. Those responsabilities are instantly forgotten when he's near Valentine, something about him makes Helis adopt a more act first think later persona, but they usually have fun with that. He's the one that gives unsolicited advices with the bestest intentions he wants to know more about his origin and maybe who's his real family but that's more a monkey palm situation that doesn't goes well when he meets his father and sister. He usually helps Sadako in her schemes, usually to treat her wounds while calls her irresponsible, dummy or anything in between those lines (she doesn't even get a cute animal band-aid...) oh he has an abnormal strength and light based power's, but that doesn't matter much to him.

His favorite animals are giraffes, he likes that they have the strongest kick, and besides their pattern is beautiful.

Ettore Zanchini: the definition of overcompensate! He simply is a tryhard in absolutely everything, he has a rivalry with Helis, Sadako and sometimes even Valentine, everything he does is trying to be the best. He likes classy outfits and good manners, he's a true gentleman with a short temper and overachiever, even though he doesn't need to prove himself that much. He's the best athlete of the school and won several fencing medals, he usually fights using two rapiers for the simple reason that this is a really dumb idea, so it's a good exercise.

He really likes Wolves and Stags, specially because they're the princes of the forest, he definitely cried with Bambi but keeps it hidden.

Stefanny: Starting as a villainess, Stef is the last one to join the crew, she's really unused to a bunch of stuff the others enjoy but tries her best to get ahold of everything, she's not the warmest person and can be really misunderstood, she's gruff and goes direct to the point in most of her interactions, some have the audacity to call her impolite, BUT SHE'S NOT! She's just not used to have conversations longer than 45 seconds or with people that aren't psycho's, she and Sadako get along pretty well, perhaps because of all their battles and training, oh and even though she's all cool and collected... She has fire powers, yeah they are neat I guess.

Her favorite animal are salamanders, she loves those little moist dragons!

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ashdreams2023 · 10 months ago

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Hello! I was wondering if I could request a Severus Snape x older sister reader? We know Sev is like a grouchy and independent person, I kinda want to see him turn into an attention seeking little baby when it comes to his older sister lol. Like imagine Dumbledore and McGonagall's shock when they see Sev whining to a woman who they don't recognize (I was thinking she didn't go to Hogwarts and went to another magical school) They didn't even know Sev has any siblings whatsoever. So basically reader visits Severus in Hogwarts (he's already a professor) She hasn't seen him in a couple of years due to her profession or something. Reader still sees Sev as her baby brother she used to take care of.

Finally gotten to this one! I was actually dying to do this it’s so cute!

Severus snape x big sister reader

Sevy

Everyone knew not to cross their professors at hogwarts, especially the intimidating potions master, severus snape, the most feared professor in the school.

Even the older professors had a great deal of respect for the young professor.

"Honestly I can’t believe he didn’t even give me one chance to correct myself!?" One hufflepuff groaned to his friend, no one was safe from severus on a bad day, even his brightest students.

"Drop it mate, you can make up for it in the next pop test-"

"Hey boys, do you know where Professor snape office is?" The two teenagers stopped in their tracked and looked at the woman speaking to them.

You smiled in a friendly manner at them and repeated your question, one of them pointed at the end of the hall. The dungeons, that figures.

"Thank you boys" The two stared at you as you walked away.

"Who is she and why is she looking for snape?"

"Who knows, but I pity her regardless…"

Meanwhile after some walking you ended up finding the office, you looked at the time table hung on the wall, his office hours were still open.

You grinned to yourself and walked.

Albus and minerva waited and waited, it was unlike severus to miss their daily meeting after lunch but here they were alone with each other’s company for the past thirty minutes.

"You don’t think something came up, don’t you albus?"

"I’m not quite sure dear Minerva but we ought to go check on him"

The two older professors took a long and silent walk down to the dungeons, where they knew he spent most of his time and knocked on his door but no answer.

"Could he have went to do some errands?"

"In the middle of a school day? That’s very unlike him…"

"The greenhouse perhaps?" The wise witch suggested. The headmaster hummed before leading the way up to the greenhouse.

They had expected a lot but what they witnessed wasn’t what they had anticipated for.

"I swear to god sevy you need to learn how to grow your own stuff, you’re a potion master" you sighed plucking one of the plants in the very back of the greenhouse with severus kneeling down near an empty plant pot.

"You know i can’t do it right! See they keep dying on me" Severus whined gesturing to the broken pots in the corner of the place.

The headmaster and vise duty stared in disbelief, severus snape was pouting, he was whining and acting unlike his stock self.

"I’ve taught you a million times, the soil have to be the right kind, you can’t expect your big sissy to be here to help you all the time"

"I know I know, I’m not a baby anymore" he got up and dusted himself off then cringed childishly when you started wiping the dirt stuck on his face "Stop!"

"No! Hold still, just because you got taller doesn’t mean you can go around looking like we still live in rags"

Albus coughed in his fist catching the attention of both adults.

"Oh hi! Sorry to intrude, I was just helping sevy here learn how to plant a practical plant for his potion making"

"And you are?" Asked the older witch.

Severus cleared his throat spoke "This is my older sister headmaster, Minerva" the two professors looked dumbfounded by the news, severus never mentioned having a sibling and a witch at that!

"But wait…why haven’t you attended hogwarts with severus?" Albus was curious to say the least.

"Well, to make short I asked mother to go to another school because my passion for herbology couldn’t be fulfilled in hogwarts you see, so I went to Uagadou"

Severus looked down at you with settle pride, you have achieved so much throughout the years and he looked up to you, you’ve become a great scientist and made some big discoveries across the globe, many may not know your face but your stage name was to be hold.

"Anyways I came to visit sevy, it’s been so long since I saw this big baby" you laughed, he huffed pretending to be offended and pushed your arm to knock you off balance.

"Hey! Don’t test me boy! I used to change your diapers!" You pointed a finger at him.

He crossed his arms and pulled out his tongue at you.

Albus felt amused seeing the two siblings bicker but minerva chuckled, severus for once didn’t seem so uptight and proper, but rather…dare she say relaxed?

"I think you should join us to tea, I’ll love to hear your side of things, my dear son severus doesn’t speak much of his life back home"

You smirked "Oh do I have stories for you, and I think you’ll especially would enjoy the river one"

Severus’s cheeks flushed red before he ground covering his face in embarrassment "I beg you, stop making life harder!"

You didn’t care what he say and that afternoon was spent with everyone having tea and listening to your embarrassing stories about the eventful childhood in spinner’s end.

"Do you just enjoy humiliating me?"

"Oh sevy, relax you I do it because I care"

"I doubt it"

"You’re welcome"

#imagine #severus x reader #pro severus #pro severus snape #severus snape headcanon #severus snape #severus snape fanfiction #severus snape x y/n #platonic severus snape x reader #harry potter requests #severussnape #severus snape fluff #severus snape x you #severus snape x reader

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wifeofwandamaximoff · 9 months ago

Text

Te Amo

(Larissa Weems x Addams!Reader)

A/N: This is my first series! Also sorry for taking so long to update, im just feeling lazy...

Warnings: None I dont think.

------------------------------------------------------------

"My little storm cloud I proud of you", father says to me. I just stared at him. I then looked at mother who had a sweet smile and was looking at me with adoring eyes.

"I only accepted to go to Nevermore because Wednesday is going as well." I said flatly to mother and father.

"Speaking of which, would you like to be in the same dorm as Wednesday?" Mother said while looking at me with loving eyes.

I just stare at her with a cold glare before looking out the window to see Nevermore approaching. The car then stopped and mother and father got out while Lurch started to take out my luggage. I just sat in the car waiting until Lurch got all my stuff out and then got out of the car. Keeping a big distance away from my parents.

My parents started to walk into the school, hand in hand with each other which made me want to stab my eyes with my own nails. From that disgusting sight of affection

I proceeded to follow them quietly, my footsteps soft and quiet. After a bit of walking my parents and I all stopped at a large door which I assumed was an office of my new principal. Since the doors were so huge and it was in its own separate hall.

Mother knocked on the door and from the other side there was a soft angelic voice saying "Come in!"

My parents then open the doors and stride in together. As I follow them with a cold and bored gaze, my eyes land on a gorgeous woman. I looked at the gold name plaque that said, "Principal Weems."

"Its been so long Larissa" , mother said with a smile while both of them sit in a chair while I stand in the middle between them.

"It has Morticia." Larissa said with a big smile, too big to be real and sincere.

"Now, we have put Belladonna in the same dorm as Wednesday as requested, she will also have most of her classes with her sister as well." Larissa said while looking at a file. I looked between mother and father and saw them happily smiling which made me want to stick their mouths closed for eternity.

"You hear that my storm cloud?! You and your sister will be together like you used to be." Father said happily. I give him a glare which makes him smile.

"But, we do not want any calls from Larissa saying you have destroyed this school Belladonna Addams." Mother said sternly which makes me give her a small smirk.

Larissa raises an eyebrow at me when mother mentioned destroying a school. I just stare at her with an empty gaze before there was a knock on the office doors.

"Come in!" Weems said before the doors opened and I saw my sister along with a girl with blonde hair and a bit of pink and blue. My sister quickly walked up to me and stood very closely to me. She then hooked her pinkie with mine and I made no move to remove it. Instead I held tighter making Wednesday smile a bit before quickly returning to her signature blank expression.

The blonde girl came up to me, about to give me a hug but I stepped away. My pinkie leaving Wednesday's making her frown a bit.

"Not a hugger, got it." The blonde girl said sheepishly.

"Pardon Belladonna Enid, she is allergic to color as well." Mother said while smiling at the blonde girl.

The blonde girl nodded who's name I think was Enid.

"Belladonna, your sister and Enid will show you to your dorm that all three of you will be sharing and later on I will give you a tour of Nevermore." Weems said with a smile that showed off her pearly white teeth.

I just stare at her blankly before Enid dragged me away with Wednesday following close behind. Leaving my parents and Principal Weems to deal with them.

Enid was talking about the history of Ophelia dorm and saying how Wednesday split half of the room making me smirk a bit.

While Enid was too busy talking Wednesday said Thing was awaiting for my arrival eagerly. Making me nod even though in the inside I was quite happy since I haven't seen him in years.

We then arrived at a door and Enid opened it up excitedly, making jazz hands when I stepped inside. I looked to see a circular window that had colors on one half and just black on one side.

"Where will I be sleeping?" I said flatly while walking to Wednesday's side.

"Ms. Weems has ordered a bunk bed and should arrive when she gives you your tour! So you and Wednesday can have your own side." Enid said with a smile. I just nod before spotting my luggage near Wednesday's bed.

I then walk towards my luggage and start unpacking my things. Just then I heard quiet and soft pitter patters. I snap my head towards the directions of the sounds before Wednesday said something.

"That Thing remember Bella?" Wednesday said bluntly. Herself picking up the bluntness from myself. My bluntness is what I pride myself in.

"I do, such a loud hand and a mystery." I said bluntly before I feel a hand crawl up my shoulder.

"Thing off, you know how I dont like people and things touching my cold shoulders." I said flatly before patting Wednesday's bed to let him know to crawl up on her bed.

"Oh Thing we have your manicures soon!" Enid said while looking at her phone which had a clock. My my, technology has truly grown. Distracting kids from their social lives and brain sucking them in for money.

Thing just bobbed up and down saying yes. Thing then turned to me and held his nails out. Showing him his freshly black painted nails that were about to be repainted because Thing chipped the pain off when Wednesday sent him to find her some crime cases to solve.

"Mine are always better Thing." I smirk slightly before showing Thing my stiletto nails that were painted void black. I then hear a knock on the door making everyone turn to the door. Even Enid who surprisingly heard it since she has been too invested in her brain sucking device.

"Who is it?" Enid shouted from her bed while now going back to her phone.

"Its Weems." I said before standing up and opening the door to see Principal Weems standing there with a big smile.

"You ready for your tour Miss Addams?" Weems asked with her voice that was so soft that it could be coated in honey. I nod before looking at my sister and Enid before leaving the dorm.

"Are you settling in well Miss Addams?" Weems asked me while starting to walk down the hall.

"Horrific." I said bluntly but she smiled. I cursed Wednesday in my head for being so similar to me.

"Im glad, now after this tour I must go back to work but I want you to come to my office at 8pm so you can collect your uniform and schedule for Monday." Weems said while taking long stride that I had to walk a bit faster to keep up.

I just silently agree before she leads me to a big open area.

"This is the quad, where all the students tend to hangout." Weems said with a big proud smile.

I look around before turning to her.

"This quad you are talking about has more then four sides." I said flatly. She just smiled sweetly at me before showing me my other classes.

"Oh my, I almost forgot. Would you like to join your sister in fencing and archery?" Weems said before almost ending the tour.

"I would like to join her in fencing, but not archery. I already excel at that." I said coldly. Weems looks at me with a bit of curiosity in her eyes.

"Well when you come into my office at 8pm I can show you other options." Weems said smiling softly. I just nod before going back to my dorm not looking back once. Knowing the tour was over.

A couple hours later its now 7:50 pm and I start making my way over to Weems's office. Myself still dressed in my gothic attire which consisted of a long sleeve dress which was short and stopped mid thigh. My hands adoring some lace ruffled gloves and my heels clicking as I walked.

I then shortly arrived at two big doors which led inside to her office. I turn to look at a nearby clock and see its 7:59. I then knock on the door. I here a soft "Come in", from inside so I opened the door to see Weems at her desk and typing rapidly on her computer. She then looks up to see who entered her office and saw me which she looked at the time on her computer to see it was exactly 8pm.

"Miss Addams, im glad you arrived exactly on time." Weems states with a smile before opening a drawer to pull out my black uniform that was identical to Wednesday's.

"Now I know you wanted to be in fencing class so I arranged but you need one more encore." Weems said before pulling out a paper which I assumed was the encores I could choose from.

"There are only two you can choose since you joined in the middle of the semester and there are barely any classes left available." Weems smile before showing me the two I could choose from.

Art or music.

"I want art." I said as soon as I saw it. I saw a flash of surprise on Weems's face for my quick reply.

"Are you sure? I teach that class and no one takes it because no one wants the principal to teach them." Weems said a bit sadly. Even frowning a bit.

"I am positive and I do not mind at all." I stated cold to get my point across that I didn't care if she taught that class or not. I wanted to take it and having her teach me was a big bonus.

Weems smiled brightly at me which I didn't't return but so badly wanted to for the first time. But my face refused to do so since im so use to not smiling its foreign to me.

"Great! Our first studio time will be on Tuesday at 5pm. Does that sound good Miss Addams?" Weems asked me while writing down a reminder for herself.

I stare at her gorgeous face, getting distracted. Her ocean blue eyes that could drown me, her red lips that I would allow marks all over my skin. Her wrinkle and smile lines that were so pretty on her face and just enhanced her beauty. Her neatly done hair that I could only dream of seeing down and raking my fingers through it.

"Miss Addams, are you alright?" Weems said a bit concerned. I snapped out of my daze to realize that she was now standing infront of me with a concerned and worried face.

"I have been calling you for five minutes Miss Addams, are you alright?" Weems said concerned. I looked up her, her height making me weak in the knees.

I then snapped out of my daze and looked back down. I looked up at her again to see those worried eyes that I so badly want to look in them forever.

"I am alright Principal Weems." I said cold. Returning back into my cold and static blunt self. Weems didn't seem convinced but didn't push any further.

"If you say so, but if you need anything dont be ashamed to ask for help. I know how you Addams are." Larissa laughed softly at the end. I just stare at her.

"As we have nothing else to talk about I shall take my leave." I said standing up from the chair and going to leave before I heard a soft "goodnight", from her. Which made me give the smallest smile before leaving.

The next day I wake up from my horrid nightmares and to the blazing white moon that kissed my pale skin. I look around to see Enid laying on her bed still asleep in an awkward position. I see Wednesday asleep right next to me since the bunk bed didn't arrive in time so we had to share.

I quietly got out of bed and stayed in my black nightgown. I checked the time and it was only 5:34 am so I decided to wander around the halls of Nevermore.

It was still dark, the halls eerie. The moon still in the dark night sky. My light foot steps quietly pattering against the cold stone floor.

I then look to see the lights of Weems's office is still on. Strange, its 2:38 am and she is still awake doing her work.

Should I go in there and tell her to sleep? I asked myself. I quickly shake that thought. Im an Addams, I'm not supposed to care. That word care alone wants me to rip my insides out again and again.

I decided I wouldn't go into her office and I would just go back to my dorm, and thats exactly what I did.

I entered back into the door to see the two still asleep. Enid snoring like a chainsaw while Wednesday made no sounds.

"Thing." I said quietly. Thing then peeks out from under Wednesday's bed.

"Go make sure Weems sleeps." I said bluntly. Thing then taps his fingers. Seemingly wanting to get something out of this.

"New hand cream now go." I said before laying back on Wednesday's bed. My eyes closing and my ears tuning in the sounds of Thing's patters while he makes his way to Weems's office.

God why do you care about some dumb Principal that is amazing beautiful!? Being in love is a curse! This is just some silly attraction that will go away soon Belladonna. I argued in my head. I huff before shutting my eyes and letting the peaceful darkness overtake me.

#principal weems #wednesday x reader #larissa weems x y/n #principal larissa weems #larissa weems #larissa x reader #hot principal #larissa weems x reader #enid sinclair #morticia addams #gomez addams #wednesday netflix #wednesday addams x reader #larissa weems angst #larissa x you #larissa x y/n #wednesday addams

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agaypanic · 10 months ago

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Hey :) I was wondering if since it’s a leap year you would maybe write a oneshot or blurb or smth with James Maguire x reader (maybe like Quinn!reader from your series??) where she proposes on the 29th of February bc it’s a tradition that comes from Ireland?? I just think it would be so cute bc he just totally wouldn’t see it coming and I’ve never seen anyone do it in a fic before

Leap Day (James Maguire X Quinn!Reader)

Masterlist

Request Something!

Summary: You, the girls, and James are now well into your twenties. Life is perfect, except for one little thing that’s been on your mind. After taking with your friends about it, you figure you should take matters into your own hands.

A/N: won’t put it on my series masterlist, but this could be seen as an epilogue of sorts to the fella series (even tho it’s not finished yet lol) but obvi it can be read as its own thing. Also im american so sorry for any terminology and such i get wrong. reader, james, and the girls are obvi aged up

***

If you had told your younger self that you and your friends ended up staying in Derry after finishing school, she would’ve thought you lost your mind. All she thought about was graduating and leaving home, traveling the world, and escaping her pain-in-the-ass sister Erin and somewhat crazy family.

But if she saw the life you had now, she’d probably understand. Because you had everything you truly wanted.

You had a nice little job close to your flat where you managed a bookstore. It was a quaint shop that became a frequent stop for some of the local teenagers. Erin also stopped by every now and then to boast about what she had already read.

When you weren’t working, you were with your friends. You were a bit more tame than you were in your adolescence, but that all usually went out the window when Michelle got a drink or two in her. Which happened often.

But the best part of your day was when you’d go home to see your boyfriend of many years, the love of your life, James Maguire.

“So, what’s goin’ on with you and him, anyway?” Michelle asked as she messily poured everyone a glass of wine. Every now and then, you and the girls got together for a night to get drunk and catch each other up on anything that happened since the last time you’d gotten together. For some reason, you and James were a bit of a hot topic tonight.

“What d’ya mean, Michelle? You know what’s going on with us.” You laughed, taking your wine glass from her.

“I mean, when are the two of you getting hitched? Has he even popped the question to ya?”

“Believe me, Michelle, you’d all be the first to know if we got engaged.” You said a bit glumly, downing your drink and waving your glass around for Michelle’s attention to fill it again.

“He still hasn’t asked you?” Clare asked with an incredulous look. From the start, she had been a big supporter of your and James’ relationship. If it was up to her, you’d probably have a few kids and a house in the countryside by now. “You’ve been going out since we were sixteen! And you just turned twenty-five a few months ago, didn’t you?”

“Yup.” You responded, popping the ‘p.’ “Nine years and no ring.” You held your bare hand up to prove your point. “But I don’t mind too much. As long as we’re together, that’s really what matters.”

“Aw, that’s sweet.” Clare cooed.

“It’s shit.” Michelle countered.

“Michelle’s right, Y/n,” Erin said, grabbing a crisp from the bowl in the middle of the table. “You’ve been waiting for James to propose since we finished at Our Lady Immaculate; admit it.”

“Have not!” You laughed at the absurdity of your sister’s sentence, but the looks everyone gave you made it die down. “Okay, maybe a little. But not seriously! It was just like a dream, you know? Like Erin thinking she’ll get published or Granda thinking Ma will actually divorce Daddy.”

Everyone giggled, except for Erin, who was grumbling about your little jab.

“Be serious, Y/n!” Clare laughed, patting your hand. “You’ve been waiting for him to ask for a long while.”

You looked down at your glass, swirling the wine around with a sigh.

“Maybe a bit.” You answered quietly. It hadn’t really nagged at you too much until recently. After all, you had been together for almost a decade, and everyone else around you seemed to be getting engaged or married. You loved James; truly, you did. But it felt like you were missing out a little. “But I’m fine with waiting.”

“The question is, Y/n, how long are you gonna have to wait until he actually does it?” Erin asked, leaning forward to stare at you. You shrugged, not really knowing the answer and not really wanting to respond.

“You might as well ask him, Y/n!” Your cousin Orla said with a grin. She was always an optimist. “He might just be scared you’ll say no!”

“You know, now that you say it, that’s probably why he hasn’t asked yet,” Michelle said, taking a sip from her wine glass that had been filled more graciously than anyone else’s. “After all, James is a pussy.”

“Don’t call my fella a pussy, Michelle!” You reprimanded, yet you still laughed along with everyone else.

“I can call my cousin what I want. And the fact is that he’s a pussy!”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea, really,” Clare said when everyone’s chuckles had died down. She gasped. “This is a leap year! You could ask him on the twenty-ninth!”

“That’s next week, Clare.” You said a bit nervously. Of course, you’d marry James in a heartbeat. But the thought of proposing, especially so soon, made you a bit sick to the stomach. Now you realize why James probably hasn’t asked you yet.

“It’s either next week or another four years, Y/n,” Michelle said with a teasing smile.

You gulped, feeling everyone’s eyes on you. As you thought about it, you had to admit that it wasn’t really a bad idea. Sure, you had less than an ideal amount of time to plan everything out. But you could probably get something small but nice together.

“Okay… Who’s going ring shopping with me?” The girls squealed at your question, getting up to surround you in a drunken group hug.

***

It was the twenty-ninth, and you were a nervous wreck. The ring weighed heavy in your pocket as you paced around your dining room. Dinner was sitting waiting on the table, and you were playing your little speech of love over and over in your head. All you needed was James, who should be home soon. But as the minutes ticked by, you wished the clock would freeze so you could have more time to prepare for this.

“Darling, I’m home!” James called out as he opened the door, and you realized you were out of time. You skipped out to the front hall to greet your boyfriend.

“Hi, Jamie.” You cooed, giving him a hug and kiss on the cheek before stepping away so he could hang up his coat.

“Sorry I’m a bit late, needed to finish some things at the office.”

“Oh, that’s okay, hun.” You waved your hands, both to dismiss his unneeded apology and to get rid of some nervous energy.

James gave you a quick peck before walking off to the bedroom to change, leaving you to overthink a bit more. You wanted tonight to be perfect. James deserved nothing less than that.

To pass the time, you grabbed a candle and placed it in the middle of the small table, finding a lighter to light the wick.

“It’s so nice to be home,” James murmured as he walked over to you, arms slinking around you to pull you close to his chest. He buried his face into your neck, leaving a kiss or two before taking a deep breath. “Dinner smells good.”

“Thank you, Jamie.” You turned your head to kiss his cheek before pulling away from him. The two of you sat down and started putting food on your plates.

You talked about anything and everything, James leading most of the conversation, which you were grateful for. You felt that if you had to talk too much, you’d either stutter too much or end up spoiling your surprise. James held your hand most of the time, playing with your fingers absentmindedly as he talked about something amusing that happened at work.

Eventually, your plates were clear and your cups were empty. James was finishing up a story about something a few of his lads had done while they were all watching some sports game you didn’t know much about. You knew that now was your time.

“Jamie?” He hummed, perking up at the sound of his name.

“Yes, love?”

“I love you.” You didn’t really know how else to start.

“I love you, too, N/n,” James said, smiling as he squeezed your hand.

You took a deep breath, about to give the speech that you’d been preparing in your head.

“I’ve known that you were the one for me since we were fifth years. Probably since I first saw you at the bus stop. That’s probably crazy, knowing something like that so early and so young… But it’s true.” You laughed, thumb sweeping over his knuckles. “These have been the best years of my life, being with you. And it might be a bit selfish of me, but I want more of them.”

“Y/n…” James whispered, tilting his head. “What are you saying, darling?”

“We have a bit of a tradition here.” You say, wiggling your hand from James’ grasp and standing up. “Ladies’ Privilege, Bachelor’s Day, whatever you fancy calling it. Where on Leap Day, girls can propose to their fella.” You stuck your hand in your pocket, fiddling with the ring. “And seeing how it’s Leap Day now, and I have a ring and all, I guess there’s just one last thing to ask.”

James’ expression turned even more stunned when you got down on one knee, now holding the silver band up in front of him.

“Will you marry me, Jamie?”

In the few seconds of silence after that question, you could feel your heartbeat in your ears. He looked at you stunned, and you desperately wanted to know what was going through his mind. How long would you have to kneel on the ground for him to give you an answer?

But then he smiled brightly, and all your worry slipped away.

“Of course, I’ll marry you!” James slipped out of his chair to join you on the floor and grabbed your face, giving you a long and deep kiss. You gripped his curls in your free hand, the other resting on his shoulder. When he pulled away, he let out an airy laugh. “I never thought I’d be the one being proposed to.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything.” You giggled with him as you slipped the band onto his ring finger. “Happy Leap Day.”

“Happy Leap Day, indeed,” James said before kissing you again.

#agaypanic #james maguire #james maguire x reader #derry girls #derry girls x reader

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procyonloser · 6 months ago

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Mini au fic IDK. Pre adamsapple. Divorced Dad Adam. Modern/Human Au

Old man yaoi

Adam picked up Abel, who was still sniffing even as he latched onto Adam's leg. Cain, on the other hand, was glowering up at his brother, still holding onto his backpack and clearly not wanting to go. Admittedly, Adam wasn't happy about being here at fucking 2 in the goddamn morning either.

"Sorry," Charlie said, lisping a bit since she'd gotten braces. She might have tried to look goth, but she was still a theater kid at heart. "In school, everyone was talking about this new movie...I mentioned it to the twins, it sounded like they wanted to see it."

"I did want to see it." Cain complained, siding with his step sister and looking put out.

"Yeah, well, Abel pissed himself in fear, so maybe no fucking slasher movies for kids under 10?" Adam huffed, readjusting Abel on his hip so the kid wasn't strangling him. "Where's your mom?"

"On a date, in the city. They were dressed all fancy and left in a really cool car." Cain said glumly.

"Wouldn't take us with."

Yeah, no shit, Adam thought to himself. He couldn't imagine a worse hell than a romantic date with two 7 year olds tagging along the entire time.

"Why don't you have any cars like that?" Cain asked him.

"Because your mom took all my shit in the divorce, and then married a rich fuck." Adam said in feigned sweetness. Charlie looked upset, eyebrows fitting together, but she was all of 13, and she knew just as well as he did that her mom Lilith was Adam's other ex wife. So, he had reason to be annoyed. "Now get your shit and get in the car, we're going home. It's too late at night for this and your brother is going to need therapy."

"The monster that lived under his bed ate out the man's eyeballs." Abel mumbled into his shoulder. Great, Adam wasn't going to sleep alone for a year.

"You suck, I wish Lucifer was my dad..." Cain stomped down the front steps with as much force as a 7 year old could muster. Adam rolled his eyes, but before he could open his mouth again, a candyapple red car came screaming up the very long driveway.

"Fuck," Adam whispered under his breath. "Here we go again."

Lucifer practically jumped out of the front seat, running up the sidewalk looking concerned, but his tie was noticeably loose, and the buttons on his shirt weren't in the right spot. There was what a bit on lipstick on his neck.

"I got your message, Charlie, is everything alright?" Lucifer asked, looking at his daughter in worry. "No one is hurt, are they?"

"Everything is fine," Adam cut her off, glaring down at the older man. "Abel got scared, I'm taking the boys home."

Lucifer looked between him and the boys, frown curling his expression downwards. "Oh no, that's too bad. I'm so sorry to hear that, I was really looking forward to the weekends they were here..."

Not enough to stop you from going out and plowing Eve on a Friday night, Adam thought in smoldering anger. He'd had to drive all the way across town to drop them off, only to come back in the middle of the fucking night for them.

"Yeah, I had the rest of the weekend planned. Homemade pancakes and waffles with whipped cream and fruit, then I was going to take them to LuLuWorld, and then I was going to let them pick out any toy set they wanted." Lucifer listed off, seemingly legitimately upset by the news. Abel's head picked up off of Adam, and he looked at his step father in sudden fixation.

Eve got out of the car, glare fixed on Adam before rounding it to wrap her arm through Lucifer's. She sure as fuck never wore any dresses like that when he'd been married to her.

"Well, if the boys want to stay with Adam, that's fine. Nothing wrong with that, Charlie likes to stay at her mother's some days too." Eve practically purred, running a finger along Lucifer's jaw. Lucifer looked up at her with adoration that made Adam's stomach turn. How long had it been since he and Lucifer had been friends?

"I think I'm okay now," Abel said, pushing to get down on the ground. Adam let him go, and Abel ran over to his step sister's side, which caused Cain to do the same. "Yeah, I'm totally okay now. Thanks Dad, see you again Monday!"

"Or never, we could just stay here," Cain said under his breath, but Adam heard it anyway.

"Oh good!" Lucifer said, turning to smile at Adam, like he was doing him some kind of favor. "I'm sure you're happy to get your weekends back! I'm sure you're busy."

Eve scoffed, and Adam boiled below the surface.

"Fucking whatever man." Adam turned to walk towards his car, but Eve stopped him with a small smile on her painted lips. Lucifer was already leading the kids back into the house, promising them popcorn and a happier movie to watch.

"Maybe we should rethink custody arrangements?" Eve raised her eyebrow at him, a sly smile darkening her features. "The twins seem much happier here."

Adam fumed, marching up to get in her face, not afraid of how it looked. "Fuck. You. You didn't even want them. I had to fucking beg you to take them on the weekends because they wanted their mom. You're not taking them from me."

Eve didn't seem bothered by his response. "Looks like I already have." She flipped her hair over her shoulder and sauntered back into the house, only sending one last parting message to him. "By the way, Adam? He's bigger."

The door shut behind her, and Adam was left outside, cold, in the dark, and pondering arsony.

"Maybe I'll fucking steal him from you, see how you like it!" Adam shouted at the front door, hands balled up into fists at his sides. "I can't fucking wait until you're miserable and I'm the one sucking his fucking soul out through his co-"

The door creaked back open, and Lucifer looked out of it, brows furrowed. "...Uh...the kids can hear you."

Adam turned bright red from embarrassment. "Fucking good! I'm glad!"

Lucifer stared at him. "... Right, goodnight, Adam."

With that the door shut, and Adam got back into his car, slamming the door closed, and then hitting his head against the steering wheel about fifty times.

First loves sucked. Second loves sucked more. Third loves sucked hardest.

He hoped his ramen in the microwave hadn't gotten mushy.

#adamsapple #hazbin hotel adam #my fics #preadamsapple #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel eve

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nyssaswitch · 11 months ago

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Pool Party with the Barca Boys

Synopsis:

Y/N is Gavi’s sister.

A pool party is being held at Gavi’s house with Frenkie de Jong, João Cancelo, Marc Guiu, Héctor Fort and Aron Yaakobishvili in attendance.

Y/N is living it up, flirting with all of the guys (and who could blame her, her brother’s teammates were HOT).

But deep down, she has a sweet spot for Héctor.

Chapter 1

Y/N’s POV

Today was the day that Y/N had been looking forward to for weeks, today Gavi’s teammates would all meet up at his place for the long-awaited pool party.

You were giddy with excitement, since you knew that Héctor Fort would be coming too.

Ever since you first laid eyes on him when accompanying Gavi during football practice, you hadn’t been able to get him out of your head.

You had a thing for football players, fuckboys and Mediterranean men and Héctor was the perfect embodiment of all three.

You knew that this was technically a pool party, but you wanted to look your best for Héctor and so you’d spent four hours painstakingly doing your hair and makeup before the guys arrived.

Since you were gonna be “swimming” and it was 25C outside, you’d put your hair up in a stylish messy bun and had kept your makeup minimal.

As for your outfit, you’d done your best to pick out the skimpiest bikini that you owned, if that wouldn’t catch his attention, you don’t know what would.

Even you had to admit that the “bikini” was quite revealing and so, you’d decided to wear a coverup over it (decent as you were). Though you were well aware that the coverup was see through and left plenty of cleavage exposed.

Worst case scenario, Héctor wouldn’t be interested in you and you’d just hook up with one of Gavi’s other friends instead.

After having locked yourself in Gavi’s bathroom for the past four hours, you entered the living room and saw Gavi sitting on the couch.

He gave you a once over as he frowned and said “you know it’s a pool party right? We’re gonna be swimming”.

“Oh I know, you said, with a smile”. “Who are you trying to impress?” asked Gavi. “No one” you squeaked, fuck, was it that obvious? You thought to yourself.

“And what in god's name are you wearing? Could you possibly have put on anything skimpier?” asked Gavi.

“You worry too much Gavi, please just take a chill pill”. “Fine”, he said, ”just know that I”ll be watching you closely and if any of the guys so much as looks in your direction, I'll kill them”. “I don’t need your protection Gavi”. “Trust me you do”, he said.

At that moment the bell rang. Saved by the bell, how cliche, you thought.

You jumped up and said “I'll get it”, as Gavi looked at you and rolled his eyes, you skipped to the front door.

In front of the door stood Frenkie, Pedri and João Cancelo.

“Hi guys, are y'all ready to party?” you asked, as you gave each of them a hug.

“As ready as I'll ever be”, said Frenkie.

“It’s nice to see you again” said Pedri.

“Looking good” said João Cancelo. “You too”, you chirped and blushed.

“Where are the others?”, you asked Frenkie.

“Marc, Héctor and Áron Yaakobishvili will be arriving in 15 minutes, Marc just texted me”, said Frenkie.

“Okey-dokey, can’t wait to get the party started”, you said. “Come on in”.

The three boys walked in and greeted Gavi.

“Woah, Gavi, you’re so lucky to have someone like that as your sister”, Frenkie said.

Pedri nodded in agreement, while João said “poeh”.

“You guys are disgusting” said Gavi, you do realise that that’s my sister, you’re talking about?

“Oh we’re well aware”, said Frenkie while grinning.

Gavi objectively knew that his sister was good looking, ever since Y/N had been in middle school, guys had been throwing themselves at her and his teammates were no different.

“Okay, can we please stop talking about my sister?” , said Gavi.

“Sorry”, João said. “But can you really blame us?”

At that moment the bell rang for the second time, causing the boys to stop bickering.

“I'll get it”, you said in a cheery voice.

You opened the door and your face lit up when you finally saw Héctor, for a moment there, you were afraid that he wouldn’t show.

“We’ve come bearing gifts”, said Marc Guiu.

“We brought plenty of booze” said Áron Yaakobishvili, lifting a bottle.

“And snacks”, said Héctor Fort, holding a platter with delicious looking mini pizzas.

He gave you the platter and as he did, your hands briefly touched, sending an electric shock through your whole body.

You wondered if Héctor felt it too.

They brushed past you as you took the tray with pizzas and placed them in the fridge.

You were still reeling from Héctor’s touch, when you made your way to the outside pool.

The pool was large and deep enough to to be making somersaults in, which is why the guys loved Gavi’s pool.

Part of the fun was seeing the guys rough housing and in swim shorts no less.

The boys had started to play football by the pool, with Áron acting as goalkeeper and the rest of the guys taking turns trying to shoot the ball in the goal.

Áron however, was giving them a tough time, demonstrating how he was shaping up to be a promising future goalkeeper for Barcelona’s first team.

Áron loved how hard the other guys were trying and started taunting Héctor once it was his turn saying “you know the ball’s supposed to land in the goal, not next to it”.

“Just you wait” said Héctor. “Yeah, we”ll show you”, said Marc.

“Eventually”, Áron retorted.

After having played three more rounds, without any of the guys managing to score, Áron said “let’s make this more interesting, the first one to score will get 7 minutes in heaven with Y/N, if Y/N is up for it, that is”.

“Y/N, how does that sound?”

“Hmmm, sorry, what were you saying?”, you hadn’t been paying attention to what Áron was saying, too wrapped up in the ogling of all the football boys and since you were basically surrounded by eye candy, you had to divide your team between each of the 6 boys milling about.

“Well, since none of these guys have managed to score, I came up with a little proposal, the first person to score will get 7 minutes in heaven with you, are you up for it?”

5 faces were staring at you expectantly, eagerly awaiting your response.

“Y/N you don’t have to agree to anything that makes you uncomfortable”, said Gavi protectively.

“So Y/N, what will it be?” Asked Frenkie with twinkling eyes.

Your breath hitched and your heart started beating a little faster, oh how you’d wished for a moment like this to occur. For Héctor’s arms to finally wrap around you and feel his lips on yours.

“Sure, I’m in,” you said coolly, while looking straight at Gavi, who just shook his head disapprovingly.

“Alright then, time to step up our game lads”, said João.

The atmosphere by the pool had changed, the guys, who’d started playing in a rowdy and playful manner had all turned quiet and pensive, pulling out all the stops and trying their hardest to make that goal.

After, what had seemed an eternity, you heard someone shout “GOAL!”.

You looked up to see Marc pumping his fist into the air and looking smug at the other guys.

“Have fun man”, Pedri said.

“Yeah, I’m definitely jealous”, said Frenkie.

Marc walked up to you, gently grabbed your hand, looked into your eyes and asked “are you coming with me?”.

Shit, you thought, you’d hoped that Héctor was gonna be the one to take you home, but it’s not like you could just blurt out “actually, I’d prefer to go with Héctor”.

So you weakly nodded and followed Marc inside the house, as the guys started cheering behind you.

“Y/N, where’s the guest bedroom?" asked Marc.

You took his hand and silently led him to the guest bedroom, your thoughts a million miles away.

Marc sat down on the bed holding your hand, rubbing his thumb over the backside of your hand.

Listen Y/N, I know it might seem like this came out of the blue, but I’ve had a crush on you for the longest time, ever since I first saw you.

You’re gorgeous and you’d make me the happiest guy alive, if you’d let me make you mine right now.

Your breath choked, this wasn’t how you’d imagined the pool party would go, but Marc, was very attractive as well and how could you say no to him, while he was looking at you with so much yearning.

He leaned in and cupped your face with his right hand, planting a soft kiss on your mouth.

As soon as his lips found yours, you carefully reciprocated.

While continuing to make out, you climbed on top of him, rocking your hips back and forth.

Marc’s breath hitched, he let out a sigh and said “baby please let me see all of you”.

You responded by unclasping your bikini top and letting it fall to the floor.

Marc grasped your breasts and slowly started massaging them, causing you to let out a whimper.

Marc chuckled, “you like that huh baby”.

You groaned “oh yes Marc, please don’t stop”. You continued to grind your core against his crotch, feeling him grow hard.

“Hmmm, baby, please stop, you’re turning me on so much and I’d rather cum inside of you” said Marc.

You lay down on your back and pulled your bikini bottoms to the side, Marc pushed one finger inside of you and whimpered “hmm, you’re so wet for me baby”.

He continued fingering you and just as you were about to come undone, he slid his fingers out of you and placed a kiss on top of your forehead.

“Sssh, baby, I know I know”, he said as you whined in displeasure, your orgasm having been so close.

Marc slid into you, filling you up wholly and stretching you out.

You let out a gasp of pleasure as he slid into you, Marc doing the same.

Marc started pumping into you harder and harder, you felt yourself getting close to climax and yelped “don’t stop”.

Marc continued to pump into you at the same pace, while you reached your climax and screamed out “oh Héctor”.

You could feel Marc filling you up, while he looked at you with hurt in his eyes.

“I, I’m so sorry, you said hastily”.

“No don’t”, said Marc, “I guess that explains everything”.

“Explains what?” You asked him.

Why you seemed so quiet and hesitant when I finally made that goal and why your first reaction was to look at Héctor.

“I”-

“You don’t have to explain yourself Y/N, I guess I know why you agreed to the game in the first place”.

Marc stalked off, with hunched shoulders, leaving you in the bed looking bewildered.

#hector fort #hectorfortfanfic #hectorfortsmut #marc guiu #marc guiu fanfic #Marc guiu smut #aron #Aron Yaakobishvili #Aron Yaakobishvili fanfic #Gavi fanfic #gavi smut #pedri fanfic #pedri smut #frenkiedejong fanfic #joaocancelofanfic #fcbarcelonafanfic

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lucijawriteswords · 6 months ago

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truck time | auston matthews

summary: you are met with a surprise as auston picks you up after practice, and a simple conversation about your game last night turns into so much more.

warnings: making out! so much angst. mutual pining, sexual tension, older brother's best friend auston, reader is insecure and always second guessing herself. a little fluffy here and there but really just a lot of angst and then a kiss at the end. very tame for me, i know. don't get used to it.

word count: 2.6k

A/N: hello hello hello! i'm sorry to have disappeared for so long. school is, as always, just a joy. and i have a new horse that i'm trying to put under saddle so that is taking just entirely too much of my time. anyways. enough about me! let's get to the story, shall we? apologies again because i did not edit this so there are likely typos. as always, let me know how you feel, what you want, who you want. i aim to please. thank you, as always, for reading, and now, enjoy the story!

you were trying hard not to cry, bouncing your throbbing leg, fidgeting with your fingernails. the bench of the picnic table you were sitting at was digging into your thighs and you knew the pattern was going to be pressed into your thighs, just another blemish amongst the bruises and blistered ankles of a hard, hard practice.

coach had skated you and your team hard today, citing last night’s game as the reason. a game you had won triumphantly, a 7-2 rout of the other team with two of your teammates getting hat tricks. but it was all in the third period. he said that if you and your teammates couldn’t produce consistently throughout all three periods, then winning didn’t even matter.

all you wanted after practice was a ride waiting for you, your sweet older brother john waiting in the car with your favorite food and open ears and seat heaters on. but he was busy, so he sent auston on his behalf. auston, who was, somehow, miraculously, free to pick up his best friend’s sister.

growing up, auston had seemed to be everywhere john was, and you were everywhere they were, despite being two years their junior. ice cream in the summer, family dinners, road trips, the summer fair- everywhere. auston and john had played hockey together until auston moved away during high school to play for the national program. since then, they’d stayed thick as thieves, and whenever auston somehow found himself back in arizona, he seemed to be everywhere john was, just like how it used to be. but now, here he was, without john in tow, picking you up from practice.

you heard the heavy tires and loud rumble of austin’s old truck, the one he kept here. the one you’d been in too many times to count. the door popped open and the thud of two heavy footfalls against pavement registered in your ears.

“hey, kid.” he drawled, the pet name ringing in your ears like a church bell, a welcome reprieve after the drilling whistles you’d been blasted with the past two hours. you grimaced in an attempt to smile.

he returned one, eyes questioning, before turning away and popping open the tailgate.

“hi.” you tossed your sticks in his general direction, hearing them clatter roughly into the bed. you bag followed suit, landing in the middle. auston’s head snapped up as he felt the tailgate sag as you hoisted yourself up, reaching for your bag to move it further up the bed. a warm hand stopped yours, hovering near the cloth handle.

"don’t worry about it, kid. i got this. just get in the truck.” his eyes were soft.

a soft smile- real this time- made its way onto your face, a quiet ‘ok’ leaving your lips as you slid off the tailgate and made your way around the side towards the passenger door.

sliding into the passenger seat and folding your legs up, your soft smile morphed into something more of a wince at the redness around your ankles. lace bite. you softy rubbed the fingers of one hand on the angry skin, the other hand reaching towards the center controls of the car for the seat heater, cranking it all the way up.

auston finally stopped fiddling in the trunk and snapped the cover down into place before shutting the tailgate. your eyes watched his figure in the rear view mirror as he made his way towards the front of the car. as he opened his door, your eyes (by no means on accident) raked across his shoulders and chest, noting the new fullness there.

“look strong, auston. they been working you hard up north?” his teeth flashed as he dropped himself into the seat, the truck bouncing under his bulk. he shook his head as he reached behind himself for his seatbelt, the smallest sliver of skin showing as his hoodie rose up. you found yourself drawing your legs closer to yourself.

“you know it, kid.”

“where’s j?” you wondered, pulling the arms of your sweatshirt down to cover your hands, impatiently waiting for the seat to warm you.

“he was running some errands before picking you up and got a flat on the highway. called a tow truck cause i guess he didn’t have a spare so he’s at the shop getting that fixed up. probably only an hour or two,” auston replied, hands flexing on the wheel as he pulled away from the curb.

“why didn’t he just call you?” you asked, shifting to face him, resting your head sideways against your headrest. “he wouldn’t have to pay you and you’d probably have it done before those guys at the shop even got the bolts out. you’re good at that type of thing.” he spared you a glance, a small grin breaking onto his face.

“why type of thing, exactly?”

you prickled under his gaze.

“oh, you know.” you returned, rubbing your thumb against the inside of your sweatshirt. “stuff with… your hands.” you trailed off, eyes falling and voice softening. something flickered in his gaze. he cleared his throat.

“how was practice?”

it was your turn to clear your throat. “bad,” you replied honestly, saw no benefit in keeping it from him.

his gazed turned to you for a moment. “why? big win last night. you played like hell.”

your eyes widened, fixing themselves on his figure. “you were there?”

he scoffed. “course i was. cheered my ass off for you.”

you felt your mouth drop slightly, confusion pulling your eyebrows together. “i didn’t even know you were there,” you whispered, wonder laced in your tone. what would you have done, you wondered, if you had known? would you have scored four goals? five? would you have looked for him, for his figure in the stands, met his eyes with a smile? would you have walked out of the locker room, beaming and sweaty, to find him standing there, arms open, for you?

you’d let go of those fantasies years ago. you’d always just been john’s little sister, ‘kid,’ the third wheel on their friendship bike. auston had been out of reach, unattainable- just two years older, but somehow a million light years away. you’d lived with feigned acceptance as girls came and went throughout highschool, had smiled and nodded and posed for pictures with them when they tagged along with you to auston and your brother’s games. you’d listened to their angry words when auston inevitably moved on, had let them drift away as plans for rides to games were no longer necessary, had monotonously deleted the photos on your phone.

the fantasies, the dreams, the hazy imaginings of you in his jersey, cheering for him, traveling the continent with him, for him, sneaking onto the ice at whatever rink you found yourself at, just laughing and loving and reveling in each other.

you’d pushed your feelings down for years, decided that once he moved to toronto, it was never going to happen. and so you loved him in secret, in childhood pictures in the collage of your phone background, in oddly timed facetime calls as he asked how to cook this, how to cook that, what the best way to get gear to stop stinking was. it never occurred to you that maybe, he was doing the same thing.

you’d never dared to let yourself believe it before but maybe, just maybe, there was a reason auston had always moved on from those girls.

something different clouded auston’s voice, something gravelly and twisted. “what would you have done if you knew?”

you laughed humorlessly, letting your head fall back against the weathered head rest. “not sure, aus. what would you have me do?”

his response was instant. “i’d want you to look for me in the stands. wave at me or blow me a kiss or something.” he paused here, preparing himself- and you, quite possibly, for what he was about to admit. “i’d want you to come out of that locker room looking for me, with a big smile just for me. give me a hug, let me carry your bag and sticks to the car. maybe…” here he leveled you with a weary glance. “maybe let me kiss you goodnight when you get home.”

such honesty was not what you had expected. you were dumbfounded at the similarity between your fantasies, at the way they lined up perfectly, like the final edge piece of a puzzle snapping into place. your head lolled comfortably against the head rest, eyes boring into the faded ceiling of the cab. you realized, with a jolt, that you should probably say something. but you couldn’t figure out what.

“auston, i don’t know what to say… i never thought, no, well i mean i thought, but i never knew-”

he waved a hand at you, his jaw grinding as his adam’s apple worried his neck. “you don’t have to say anything. i shouldn’t have said anything. just want you to know. just… just want you.” his voice strained before dying with a crackle. he cleared his throat, resigning himself to stare at the road ahead, one hand gripping the wheel so tightly his knuckles shown white, the other fretting the hem of his sweatshirt.

the silence grew and grew until the air shimmered and your seat was uncomfortable and your shirt was too tight. you, too, fidgeted, grumbling and cursing and trying to wriggle out of your sweatshirt, unclipping your seatbelt with a huff and tugging the thing over your head, too preoccupied with getting the heavy garment off to notice that your shirt was coming with it until you heard auston's muttered curse.

your face heated to an unbearable temperature, so hot that you had to crack the window. you dared to glance at him and found him with his jaw clenched, eyes locked firmly on the road, but the hand that had previously been playing with his hoodie was now sitting atop the center console.

"you're killing me, kid. that was mean. you gotta play fair," he grumbled, essentially whining at this point.

you didn't know what to say, so without giving yourself time to think or reconsider or second guess you laid your hand atop his, folding your fingers under his palm and lightly tracing the back of his hand with your thumb. you still said nothing. the only noise was the roaring of the tires against the road and the wind streaming in through your window, which did little to cool the suddenly far too hot car.

"i didn't do it on purpose." you whispered.

your eyes drifted to where your hands lay intertwined on the console before returning the road, nothing but field and dust and rocks behind, ahead, and beside you for miles.

you realized at the same time auston did.

your hand squeezed hard onto his as you felt the truck begin to slow and saw the turn signal lighting up the dark road as he pulled off onto some old, overgrown, unused farmhouse driveway.

the truck's engine purred softly before quieting, the whole thing rocking softly as he put it in park, twisting the key out of the ignition.

you gulped, gripped his hand tighter.

"do you-"

"i didn't-"

you pressed your lips together, a smile trying to fight it's way onto your face. he shook his head, lightly nodding towards you, signaling your you to speak. you shifted again, drawing your legs up onto the seat so that you were sitting criss-crossed, facing him.

you took a deep breath. "i didn't know you felt that way, auston. and i promise i wasn't trying to tease you just now. i just..." you trailed off, meeting his gaze to find his eyes already fixed on yours. you steadied yourself, bringing your other hand to where you were already holding one of his.

"i just didn't think that there was any way on earth that you could ever like me back. i've always been just john's little sister and my crush on you was just something that came naturally from you being my older brother's best friend. and then you left," your voiced cracked a little. his squeezed your hands lightly in his, bringing them to his mouth to press a light kiss to your knuckles.

you cleared your throat, sniffling. "you went to michigan. and then you got drafted. and i know it's only been a few years since then, and we're still really young, but i have never felt so strongly for anyone as i have for you. i mean-" a humorless, sobbed laugh. "i've never even liked anyone else. i've had to sit here and be friends with all your girls and now i have to stay here without you and it's been torture," you bit out, voice weak.

"every time you call me, asking for help to cook something or for girl advice it makes me want to claw my eyes out." you admitted, voice hoarse. "i hate that i'm not there with you, and stupidly, i hate that you have to call me if you need me. not- not me, i meant my help. i don't know, i'm rambling. but i just.... i really had no idea that you felt like that, and i've felt like that about you for my whole life and it just- i don't know. i'm gonna shut up." you trail off, eyes falling to your lap.

his hand around yours is warm, and it’s the only reminder that he is still in the vehicle with you because is completely, utterly, unnervingly silent. you don’t dare to look up at him, scared of what you’ll find on his face, in his eyes.

some part of you is terrified that this is a sick joke, that he did this for a dare, because how in the world could auston possibly feel that way about you? about his best friends little sister? part of you believed that he still saw you as the gap toothed, pink waxed laces, smushed between them on the bench of auston’s first truck, pigtailed little girl.

the silence was becoming unbearable. you lifted your head in exasperation, still too scared to meet his eyes. “auston, please say some-”

you were cut off by the soft press of his lips against yours. his hand found a spot on the back of your neck, pulling you into him, drinking you in like you were oxygen. you sighed, loosing a breath you didn’t know you were holding on to as you melted into him, one of your hands wringing itself from his grasp to slide along his chest and fist in his sweatshirt there.

the pieces of your heart, which you really hadn’t even known was broken, pulled themselves together, stitched themselves up with every press of his lips, every swipe of his tongue, every sharp breath through his nose, every groan as he fists your hair and pulls your head back to kiss you deeper than you thought was possible.

when you finally break apart, his eyes are glazed over with something that looks an awful lot like love. you can feel his heart beating rapidly underneath your hand on his chest.

and suddenly, there were no more unanswered questions, no more wishes and dreams of the shared life you both wanted. no more what-ifs and maybes. there was just this, just the two of you, together in his truck, surrounded by stars and the future.

#nhl hockey #hockey #nhl #lucijawriteswords #nhl smut #auston matthews #auston matthews smut #toronto maple leafs #auston matthews fic #toronto maple leafs fic #nhl hockey fic

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scientia-rex · 1 year ago

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Read some more of Toxic Parents tonight and wow!!!! the amount of anger I have!!! and the incredible unwillingness I have to actually remember my childhood and feel associated feelings!!!!! Like, there are events I keep telling over like talismans, because these are the events that prove I'm not crazy. These are things that happened that should never have happened. The time Dad kicked the door in is the biggest one. The time I spent twelve straight hours cowering in the far back of our station wagon with my fingers jammed in my ears so I wouldn't hear my father screaming at my mother and my mother sobbing as we drove to a different state. The time I told my mother I had gotten accepted to graduate school and her first words were, "How are you going to pay for it?" instead of "Congratulations" or "I'm proud of you."

But these aren't all of it. They're so far from all of it. One memory I have is not of the presence of abuse, but the sudden, bewildering absence of it: my sister drove me to the nearest town with a mall, an hour and a half away. We were stopping to pick up snacks for the drive back, I think at a Safeway. I picked up a box of Golden Grahams cereal and nervously asked my sister if I could have it. She said, "Of course you can, you know what you want." In the limbus of a childhood spent being told I was picking the wrong soda for myself when I gave my order at fast food restaurants, suddenly being told I could have what I wanted T-boned me emotionally. It was like running into a wall I hadn't known was there. What? I can just want things? I can just get things and have them because I want them? I don't have to justify it, or lie, or hide what I want? No one is going to tell me I'm stupid for wanting something or that I'll regret it?

Just an incessant drip-drip-drip of emotional abuse, sometimes punctuated by a flash flood. "If I leave your mother, how do you think you're going to eat? You're going to end up on the street."

And now, reading the section on how children end up feeling about the passive parents who enable abuse, I just think, oh, there's me! There's me. I hated her and pitied her and loved her and wanted more for her. I didn't have the adult emotional capacity to understand how much of her life she was complicit in, but damningly, I did vaguely, tangentially understand that she was constantly making excuses for Dad--coming to my bedroom to sit on my bed and tell me, while crying, that he was sorry, while he never apologized. Making it my job to comfort her. I said to her once that I remember, "If he was really sorry, he'd stop doing this," and she just looked at me with something that looked like sorrow but I could tell was rage--she was angry at me for not forgiving him and letting us snap right back into the "good" phase between angry outbursts, where we could, for however long it lasted, pretend to be a normal family.

And how she always resented me. She resented that I was separate from her, she resented that I could do and see and understand things she couldn't, she was angry when I went into Psychology, even angrier when I went into medicine. She's been throttling down her anger at Dad for as long as I've been alive, pretending to be malleable, having vague health complaints and maladies mixed in among the real ones, forever retiring to her bed with a washcloth over her eyes instead of interacting with me.

And now that I'm an adult, and not just an adult but a middle-aged doctor, why don't I call? Why do I insist on bringing up the past? Why do I expect Dad to apologize? I'm hurting his feelings, after all.

The past. Sure. When I graduated from medical school, he named the worst doctor we ever met and said, "He went to medical school, too. Don't get a big head."

And when we were talking, once, not long ago, maybe two years or so, about how he used to stand there and yell at us--I can't remember any of the words anymore, just the way he looked, the tone of his voice, the experience like being buffeted by a strong wind--he said, "At least your sister fought back. You just stood there and took it."

I can't imagine a clearer illustration that he doesn't actually regret his behavior. He doesn't regret his actions. He still feels justified. We were disappointments, we were failures, we weren't him, we weren't what he wanted for us, and more than that, we were convenient targets for his rage. You can do almost anything to your children and get away with it. And he didn't hit us, so it was okay, and the fact that we were hurt by the actions he took with the intent to hurt us means that we were weak. And it's okay to hurt the weak.

Christ! This is the man who, in a fit of sullen self-pity, when I gave him a mug that said "World's #1 Dad" for Father's Day when I was probably eight or nine, talked about how we both know that's not true. As if a child is your therapist. As if it were my responsibility to reassure him.

My mother has read Toxic Parents. My mother has read Why Does He Do That? She has a bachelor's and most of a master's in psychology. She has an IQ of 150. She is a bad mother. It feels like the worst judgment you can make, a bad mother. It feels worse than calling someone a bad father. Because we expect less from fathers. But a bad mother is unnatural.

But lots and lots and lots of mothers are bad at being mothers. And I love mine and I hate her, and I'm angry and I'll always be angry, and I'll die angry, and I have to try to carve what happiness I can from a world I entered into under false pretenses. I was always told I was wanted. I knew I wasn't. I may have been intentional, but I wasn't wanted.

My mother's mother just died last week. I didn't know her. She chose not to know us. I hadn't seen her since I was twenty-two and graduated from college. My mother is struggling with her relationship with her mother. She often tells me her mother was a narcissist. I want to ask her what she thinks she is. She's not a narcissist, but she's an enabler, she's a doormat, she's a classic case of codependency, and I don't think she sees it that way. I always got the sense she was just waiting for us to grow up and go away so she and Dad could go back to being happily miserable alone together.

I asked her, this last year, if she'd read Why Does He Do That? and she said she had, and she asked me carefully why I was thinking about it, waiting for me to confess to her that my husband of ten years was abusive. She's been gunning for this relationship since the beginning--I'd been with him for maybe a year when she mailed me a copy of He's Just Not That Into You (or maybe it was the sequel, It's Called a Breakup Because it's Broken) along with an article on how to date as a single older woman. I was 23. She was flabbergasted when I said I thought Dad was abusive. Denied it immediately. I listed examples and she didn't even say words, just made simultaneously pained and exasperated noises.

She wants me to be single and a career failure and pathetic so she can feel good about herself in comparison. Dad thinks he wants me to be like him, but if I actually behaved like he does, I think he finally would belt me.

I had to hide everything good in me from them so they wouldn't deliberately ruin it. I couldn't tell them about my writing. The first time I finished writing a novel I told Mom and she didn't even acknowledge it, just told me to do the dishes. I was sixteen. I can't tell them what I love about my husband because it would be like speaking to them in a foreign language. They think it's a performance, like their performance, and they're always waiting for me to slip up and reveal the misery they're sure is lurking just underneath.

I've done well. They don't own me. I wish I had real parents, but I'm going to try not to shop for oranges at the hardware store anymore.

#the attending dr. kristophine

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