#LMAOOOOOOOO 'you have to tell me if this is his thing!'

[telomirage]

"you set up a trick that they already knew about 'cause they've got the real thing" <- they absolutely dooo

[lethalchiralium]

Almost | Simon “Ghost” Riley x Wife!Reader

a/n: you guys literally persuade me so easily it’s hilarious. i’ve had this in my drafts since december LMAOOOOOOOO

warnings: doctor’s appointments, ultrasound of baby three! :) simon is NERVOUS, he is literally imploding

summary: Just a doctor’s appointment to find out baby three’s gender.

PREVIOUS << | >> NEXT | Masterlist

“It’s not that big of a deal, Simon, sit down.”

Your voice registered in his ears but he didn’t listen, he paced in the small examination room after he had helped you onto the table…seat…thing. The medical face mask felt itchy on his face, the lights were too bright, he didn’t like having his hair not covered - he wanted to leave. Hospitals brought up a lot of trauma from previous long hospital stays after Roba, staying a few weeks with Tommy after he had overdosed and almost killed himself - and the three months Winnie was in the NICU.

To say he was uncomfortable would be an understatement.

Because he was more in his head than ever before, worrying about you non-stop since you had told him you thought you were pregnant seven weeks ago. He felt his repressed shame from missing the pregnancies of his first two daughters, now he had a third child to worry about. He felt helpless - like he didn’t know how to do this; which he didn’t really. He never did doctor appointments in the civilian world, he avoided hospitals like the plague, and he definitely did not have experience with having a pregnant wife. He was in emergency mode at all times.

You, on the other hand, were graceful. Having to go through an entire pregnancy by yourself without any support from your spouse was one of the most difficult things you have ever done - but now you had Simon. Even if he was having a mental battle with himself, knowing that he knew and that he was supporting you meant everything.

You stretched out your right hand, putting it right in his line of sight. He slowed to a stop, eyes staring at your hand. You wiggled your fingers, to which he gently took your hand in his own. His eyes met yours.

You gave him a smile. “Simon, I need you to take a breath.”

The rugged man in a black jacket sort of huffed before begrudgingly sitting in the chair beside you. You squeezed his hand and he immediately squeezed back.

“Don’t want to be here.” He immediately regretted his word choice after he spoke, his eyes looking to yours while you gazed at the white ceiling.

“I know.” You answered, hand squeezing his again. “I’ve got a lot of trauma from hospitals too.”

That really surprised him. “Really?”

“You remember Dave.” Simon nodded. “He had brain cancer when he was 12. I was 18, driving him to and from doctor’s appointments and staying with him at the Children’s Hospital because our parents had to work overtime to keep up with the bills.” Your free hand settled on your stomach. “Jake was off in the Navy by that point, Tommy was six and was staying with my grandma. Mom and Dad were always there every second they could since they were working, but it was mostly me. Slept on a pull out bed for months until he got to come home.” You kept staring at the ceiling, the image of your brother on a hospital bed, hooked up to endless wires was an image that was hard to scrub away.

“Your brother’s okay now, right?” He squeezed your hand, you looked to your husband then. He looked a lot more focused than he was earlier, his breathing a lot less rapid. You simply nodded in response. “Good. I like Dave.”

“I know.” You commented as there was a knock on the door, to which you answered, “Come in!”

In stepped your doctor, a woman with tight coils of curls tucked back into a ponytail. She wore pink scrubs with a purple stethoscope. You could tell she was smiling at you from behind the mask, “Hello, Mrs. Riley! It’s good to see you again.” She waved to you, before nodding at Simon. “I assume you’re Mr. Riley?”

“Yes.” He answered, she gave him a smile too before turning and gathering the equipment.

“How is Winnie and Melody?” She asked while you pulled up your shirt.

“Perfect as always.” You squeezed Simon’s hand then. “Mellie’s getting too big for me to carry, and she’s walking now.”

“Walking already? She’ll be outrunning Winnie before you know it. Gel’s cold, sorry.” The doctor commented before putting the gel on, making you take in a soft gasp. Simon squeezed your hand then, you looked to him and gave him a reassuring smile, mouthing, I’m okay.

“Alright, off the bat...” She noted, moving the little wand around after she had placed it on your stomach. “Want to know the sex or wait like last time?”

Your gaze moved from Simon to the screen then back to him, watching at his eyes settled on you, not on the screen. “Up to you.”

Simon’s eyebrows furrowed. “No, you’re the one growing a baby here. You choose.”

You gave him a sharp glare then. “Simon, pick now or I will make you re-gutter my house.”

“Doesn’t scare me. You choose.”

“Simon, I will only say it once more.” Your hand moved to grip his chin, nails digging into his skin a little. “You put the baby in there. Choose. Now.”

He sighed, knowing that you wouldn’t budge. He looked around you to the doctor. “Yes.”

She nodded and looked back to the screen, moving the little wand as you and Simon watched it too. He took your hand again, squeezing it before kissing the side of your cheek through his mask.

“Well, let’s see - ten fingers,” She hummed a little as you held your breath. “Ten toes…” She gasped a little before looking to the both of you, moving the wand back before pointing to its heart. “That is your baby boy’s heart, beating nice and strong, mama.”

“A boy.” You beamed, a smile wide on your face. “Simon, a boy.”

Simon put your hand against his mouth, you could feel him kiss your hand again through the mask. His eyes had softened, watching the screen as the little heart beat - something in his chest squeezed his own heart, and for the first time in his life, he wished to never forget this feeling. The light tingling in his chest, the heat that felt like sunshine, and the way one little picture took his breath away.

“Any names yet?” The doctor broke the small silence, looking to you but you had shook your head.

“He gets to be home the whole pregnancy, so he gets to name him.” You settled your other hand on the top of your stomach, absentmindedly rubbing it. “Felt bad he didn’t get to name Mellie.”

“Mellie? That’s such a cute nickname.” The doctor smiled, you nodded.

You looked at your husband, seeing how tears had collected in his eyes. You squeezed his hand, turning back to your doctor. “Can we two pictures?”

The doctor nodded, “I’ll be right back with them.”

Simon put that picture in the breast pocket of his uniform the next day. He definitely did not show Price as soon as he walked through the door. He definitely did not show Gaz next, who bear hugged his friend, saying, “My godbaby!”

Soap definitely did not start screaming, “You’re gonnae send Mini Ghost aftae me!”

———

part two may or may not make a lot of you cry and hate me lollolololol

———

Copyright © 2023 lethalchiralium. All rights reserved.

[nattinatalia]

Jack Harlow x Instagram AU

A/N : A little late but something is better than nothing lol enjoy 👻

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, yourusername, ezharlow,cassiewyatt, and 7,567,355 others

alizemiaharlow What up bullet?!

View all 1,300 comments

cassiewyatt YES YES YES 🔥 hot mama

ezharlow 🤦🏻 had to ruin her for me 💔

alizemiaharlow Not like you had a chance with her anyway.

yourusername 😍😍😍

yourusername side note, I love me some Paul Walker 💙

jackharlow Yeah we know but there wasn’t anything Paul Walker related here so idk why say that.

ezharlow Ohhhh look at Mr “I don’t get jealous.”

jackharlow Shut up.

yourusername 💀😭😭😭

•

Liked by cassiewyatt, cozane, meganfox, selenosunni, jackharlow, yourusername, and 6,876,345 others

alizemiaharlow “No, I’m eating boys. Boys are just placeholders, they come and go.” 🩸 🩸

View all 1,200 comments

meganfox 🔥 yesssssss you killed it

alizemiaharlow OMGG AHHH I CAN DIE HAPPY NOW.

user Queen of Halloween 🎃

urbanwyatt Hey, that throne belongs to my wife.

ezharlow WHY DO YOU KEEP RUINING IT FOR ME!!!!!!!

cassiewyatt Control your little boy hormones.

jackharlow I agree with you son

yourusername lmaoooooooo I hate you.

alizemiaharlow These boys are annoying mom!

yourusername Story of my life baby, just have to roll with the punches.

•

Liked by alizemiaharlow, yourusername, selenosunni, druski, claybornharlow, and 7,567,345 others

ezharlow I think I got a little too cocky this time.

View all 1,200 comments

alizemiaharlow WHO’S RUINING THINGS NOWWW????

alizemiaharlow LIKE WHYYYY RUIN HIM FOR ME 😭

druski How can you love a anime guy? It’s not possible

yourusername IT IS POSSIBLE AND EZEQUIEL YOU REALLY DID RUIN IT FOR USSS 😩

ezharlow 💀

ezharlow If you think I ruined him for you, just watch my next one 😈

alizemiaharlow Oh god nooooo.

yourusername IT BETTER NOT BE WHO IM THINKING BECAUSE I WILL DISOWN YOU.

jackharlow Who’s being dramatic now 😗

yourusername QUIET JACKMAN.

•

Liked by yourusername, ezharlow, urbanwyatt, cassiewyatt, alizemiaharlow, and 2,449,455 others

jackharlow Sebastian really taking the role of Spider-Man seriously. 📸 @ urbanwyatt

View all 1,200 comments

yourusername 🕷️ 🕸️ ❤️

urbanwyatt ✨ He really is a natural, easiest client ever.

jackharlow I take offense to that.

cassiewyatt So do I

alizemiaharlow X’3 🤨

urbanwyatt Let me just *runs and hides*

user I thought his name was Ace???

jackharlowsource It is. Sebastian is his middle name, they always use their middle names 🤷🏻‍♀️

claybornharlow my friendly neighborhood Spider-Man 😍

ezharlow Can we talk about the fact he saw a old picture of me dressed as Spider-Man and he said he wanted to be like me 🫡🫢

yourusername That tugged at my heartstrings when he said that 🥺 my baby boys ❤️

•

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, ezharlow, alizemiaharlow, and 7,866,345 others

yourusername While everyone is getting ready for our annual Halloween party, there’s Lizeth, who hates dressing up 😩

View all 2,200 comments

jackharlow It’s her world, we just live in it ✨

alizemiaharlow Wow, I remember you used to tell ME that.

yourusername 😅

jackharlow Let me rephrase that- It’s my girls world, we just live in it.

alizemiaharlow I guess I’ll take it.

yourbestiename She really does hate dressing up, who is sheeeee????

urbanwyatt She got that from @ cassiewyatt

cassiewyatt Wait a minute, I like dressing up, just not all month. I’m not like mom, tia and Mia.

•

Liked by yourusername, selenosunni, alizemiaharlow, ezharlow, and 6,876,345 others

jackharlow HARLOWEEN ❤️

View all 1,200 comments

yourusername My man 😍

jackharlow For life 🤞🏼

alizemiaharlow My parents really did that 🔥

ezharlow Not dad being in character all night 😭

cassiewyatt ❤️

alizemiaharlow Cass, when are you posting your Halloween pictures? 👀

cassiewyatt Eh should I???

alizemiaharlow Duhhhhh

mamamaggie You two 😍❤️

•

TAG LIST

@heavyhitterheaux @harlowsbby @arination99 @cmalass @jackharloww @minkookie95 @deannaard @jacksmoviestar @harlowcomehome @fdl305 @httpkoylinnn @xoxokiaraaxoxo @hoodharlow @automaticpeachsong @amethyst09 @aliciacat20 @allyson15 @gabbylovesreading @stefansalvatoresgf @violetdreamsworld @carma-fanficaddict @jasminxts @itsaaliyah2 @itsyagirljaz @harrycanyonmoonn @neon-lights-and-glitter @awhore4moree @toocriticalharlow @thefemalestorywriter @lightsoutstyles @violetslays818 @fantasywritersstuff @vanwritesfan-fiction

[aluria-sevhex]

ToT Bonnie i love you but that is not how it's pronounced

NOW FOR MY NOTES, COPIED FROM MY NOTES APP INSTEAD OF SCREENSHOTTED THIS TIME (edit: put it under a read more because long)

ACT 2

-THE TIPS ON HOW TO PLAY ARE FUCKING DIAGETIC?

-"stardust" are you the starhead bitch from the trailers

-i feel like i'll have to ask the librarian for a book eventually

-THE RUNNING ONE IS CALLING OUT SIF LOL (for running from his problems) (hmmmm Sif what problems r u running from?)

-ugh. it's the starhead bitch

-plot twist the star head is Siffrin and that's why he's depressed :P

-their name is Loop. i don't trust them

-"Yeah, better know this one's pronouns so you can think very clearly in your head that they're getting on your nerves."

-LOOP CAN READ THE PROFILES? WHAT KIND OF META BULLSHIT IS THIS </positive i fucking love meta bullshit>

-hm is Loop some sort of weird representation of the player. or a god.

-learn WHAT?

-hm feel like this game might explore some of the moral iffiness that tends to arise with time loops. is a friendship genuine if one person knows exactly what the other will say?

-"don't eat pineapples. you're allergic" fuck you. i WILL eat pineapples and i WILL enter anaphylaxis and i WILL die stupidly but it will be WORTH IT

-WAIT HOLD UP WHAT WAS THAT DIALOGUE IN THE >> TUTORIAL "don't make the same mistakes i did" I THINK THAT'S WHAT THEY SAID HOLD UP

-maybe Loop was a normal person who got stuck in a time loop for too long and fucked up somehow? and that's why they're like this

-idk if i'll zone out much i don't wanna miss any differences

-altho if there's a difference won't i zone back in?

-then again there's a lot of dialogue

-maybe this will be plot-important somehow?

update after being gone for a bit:

-Tears weewoo

-SIFFRIN SAID NYA

-side note i am so glad i fought that thing that dropped the crest even tho it was hard. fighting it again on future loops is gonna suck tho

-also fun fact right after i died to the Tears i ran ahead and accidentally got crushed by the rock again. which i think is bullshit because I RAN TO THE SIDE OF THE ROOM

-back to more important things. like Siffrin saying nya. or the thyme pun.

-ODILE SAID IT. look she has a phd or whatever equivalent there is here probably, she's like 40, i think she's earned the right to do whatever the fuck she wants

-Isabeau is AOBB (Assigned Omelette By Bonnie)

-"It'd be awful to keep yourself from becoming a person you feel comfortable with just because it would upset someone else."

Breaking news: the game where the protagonist uses he/they, two other major characters use they/them, and there is a conversation explicitly referencing pronouns and giving them, unsurprisingly supports trans rights

-BONNIE DO NOT EAT THE EGG KEYCHAIN

-BONNIE HAS A WOK >:D

-uh... why are the Vaugardians freaking out over crab. does the Change religion ban it?

-Vaugarde is weird. first, they have a VERY SPECIFIC RULE where entering the FIRST ROOM of a house is fine, but any further is rude. second: crabs??? ok i guess???

-an openphrase... ya mean a password?

-fuck it i am fully in "taking gratuitous extensive notes" mode

-hehe protector craft is gullible :P

-oh hey tasteful artistic nudes. so this room's resident is an art student. hopefully their grasp of anatomy was improved :]

-Mira said what the crab instead of what the hell

-"what the CRAB did you let Bonnie do when we said no!!!"

-YOU LET THE PRE-TEEN DRINK VODKA???

-LMAOOOOOOOO IT WAS WATER. I LOVE HOW MUCH OF A LITTLE SHIT SIFFRIN IS

-checked it again. the people are "doing fun things" eh so what if an art student draws porn, that's on me for peeking ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ still hope it improved their grasp of anatomy. if the anatomy was bad and the narration didn't tell me i would be disappointed in it :P

-ooo drawn tarot card. isn't the Six of Swords a bad one? i feel like it's foreshadowing somehow but i don't feel like looking its meaning up

-i fucking hate the triplet Sadnesses they're so annoying

-the reason the Mandela Effect with Berenstein/Berenstain happened is because Sif equipped the e

-OH? saving records party progress if you loop back to that spot :0

-yippee i beat the Sadness boss that changes its type (this is like the first enemy that does that i think)

-Mira are you hungry

-YEAH LET'S FUCKIN' EAT

-this question keeps popping in my head but where the fuck IS Siffrin from plot twist the kid was right and he's from the sky idk i'm saying random shit

-SNACK TIME

[changbinsboiledegg]

Can I request Enha reactions to their non-confrontational gf getting in a fight? Like fist fighting/hair pulling/etc. whether the reader wins or not is up to you [=

LMAOOOOOOOO I'm sorry this is very unhinged to me. But I love it soooo let's go. Thank you for the request! 🫶

Fem! Reader x Enhypen.

Warnings: Fighting, violence ofc, blood mentions, bruises & cuts mentions, pent up anger? A bit of angst? Hurt/comfort. lmk if I missed any!

Note: I didn't know if you wanted this to be full of crack or written seriously so I chose seriously.... Kinda. Lmao. I hope you like it and that this is what you meant! ily and if there are any typos, ignore them 🫶

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

Heeseung

You were pissed off, to say the least. Being a non-confrontational person, you always knew other ways to manage your anger.

Until this girl insulted Heeseung, who didn’t do anything to provoke her. You and Heeseung were on a date, enjoying breakfast.

That was until you stuck out your leg and tripped her as she fell, causing her to fall face down, stunned.

This gave you enough time to grab a fistful of her hair and yank her up onto her knees before swinging your fists into the side of her face repeatedly as bystanders— and Heeseung, watched in shock and horror.

“Hey man, get your girl!” A bystander hissed at Heeseung. Heeseung immediately shook his head. He has never seen you this pissed off before and the last thing he was going to do was get in the middle of all of your pent up anger.

“Nope. This is between them. I’m fine where I’m standing.”

You won the fight, unscathed, and with a boyfriend who secretly felt honored that you defended him, even if he does wish the situation turned out differently.

Jay

“Ow!” You seethed as Jay dabbed the wet rag as gently as he could over the cut on your cheek. As much as your bruises and cuts hurt, you were still slightly embarrassed for losing the fight against your enemy.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t want you to get any infections. Please hold still.” Jay’s tone was gentle and soothing. But he was there to witness the fight, and you could tell he wasn’t very happy about it.

You held still and kept quiet for the majority of the time that he helped you. That was until the silence felt too deafening.

“Are you mad at me?” You sheepishly asked. Jay let out a soft sigh as he applied the last bandage to your busted lip. Your face was a mess after the fight, but now it was a mess covered in bandages.

“Why did you get so angry? You’re never that angry.” Jay’s voice was still gentle as he refused to raise his voice at you.

“I don’t know. I just remember her saying something and-and it set me off.” You replied with as much honesty as you could muster. “I hated it— the anger. Not because I lost, but because it just felt very…”

“Not you?” Jay finished, cleaning up all of the bandage wrappers and bloodied rags.

You nodded, still thinking of words you meant to say, but felt Jay’s response was close enough.

Jay looked at you and put a hand on your shoulder as gentle as ever, “please tell me next time you feel yourself about to snap again.”

You nodded again, vowing to not snap like that again. At least not in front of him.

He leaned down to kiss your forehead on the part that didn’t have a bandage.

“Let’s eat something. We can talk more about this later.”

Jake

“Hey! Babe! Stop!” Jake held his hands up in surprise. You were too blind in rage, pounding your fists against your enemies face repeatedly that Jake’s voice didn’t register.

Jake looked at your enemies boyfriend, who was just as shocked as he was.

“Do something!” He yelled towards Jake. Jake tried to think of a way to get you to stop— to listen, without accidentally getting hurt in the crossfire.

Suddenly, your enemy pushed you off by jabbing her knuckle into your sternum, causing you to fall beside her, breathlessly and feeling as if your lungs had collapsed.

Now you were the one with fists being pounded into your face repeatedly.

You were on the verge of passing out when she abruptly stopped, leaving your face bloodied and sore.

“Let me go!” She screamed. Jake watched briefly in relief as her boyfriend managed to drag her off of you and away from the scene entirely. Then he rushed to your side, collapsing to his knees.

Putting his hands on either side of your face with care, he felt worried that you stopped breathing.

But then you gasped as air started to flow through your lungs regularly.

“Babe! Are you okay?! Can you speak?” Jake was close to dialing for emergency services when you forced yourself to sit up, using your sleeve to wipe some of the blood off of your face, only to wince.

“Jake?” Your voice was weak and raspy. Jake put his arm around you to assist you.

“Yes, love?”

“Did I win?”

Sunghoon

Sunghoon was surprised to see how aggressively you fought back when a group of girls tried to jump you. He was even more surprised to see that his non-confrontational girlfriend had won against all three of them.

You clenched your bloodied knuckles, feeling the soreness taking over. Quickly, you marched over to Sunghoon, grabbed his hand, and pulled him after you as you fled the area.

Sunghoon didn’t say a word, not knowing what to say.

He wasn’t sure if you were still angry or if you were in pain, but he kept quiet until you both got to your place. You quickly locked the doors and went to the bathroom, leaving him standing in your living room.

Sunghoon knew he should ask about what happened eventually. He made his way to the bathroom, hearing the sink running and the door was open ajar.

You hissed, wincing as the water washed off the blood from your bruised knuckles.

Sunghoon opened the door and took your hands in his to examine the damage done.

“I didn’t know you could fight like that.” He commented and reached for the first aid kit under the sink. You lightheartedly chuckled.

“I never had the opportunity before.”

Sunghoon raised his eyebrows in surprise but kept quiet and wrapped two bandage wraps around your knuckles, trying to be helpful. You watched, feeling the anger fading away as you watched your boyfriend helping you.

Sunoo

You managed to get one swing in before the other girl ran away in fear. You huffed, shaking your sore fist to try and alleviate it.

“Um.” Sunoo cleared his throat, hesitantly walking close to you after previously standing back far enough to avoid getting hit during the short-lived fight.

“Yeah?” You turned to him, speaking in a soft tone. You felt a bit of guilt that he had to witness your rage like that. Even if it was for a minute.

Sunoo never thought he would see you punch someone. He didn’t think he’d see you do as little as yell at someone, you were always non-confrontational.

“What… was that about?” He asked, glancing from you and to the direction the girl ran off to. You took a deep breath, rubbing your knuckles.

“I’m so sorry you had to see that.” You apologized, seeing the shock on his face. If you overanalyzed it, you could see a bit of disappointment.

“You didn’t answer my question.” Sunoo slightly frowned. You gently nodded, “she was my enemy back in school. I just didn’t think she’d hold onto our rivalry for this long.”

Sunoo was still confused but then again, he heard what your enemy said to you before you swung your fist into her cheek.

“Just… Please, don’t fight again. Please?”

You felt bad. You never wanted to disappoint him like this. So you agreed.

“I promise. Never again.”

Jungwon

“Hey, it’s okay to cry. You did get hurt.” Jungwon tried to soothe you as you sat in your bed, crying.

But not because the bruises and cuts you received hurt. You were crying because you lost.

In front of Jungwon. And the small crowd that surrounded when the fight broke out.

You were crying from embarrassment and you’ve ultimately decided you could never show your face in that area again.

“Let’s have a movie night. You can pick the movie. I will buy snacks. Okay? Let it all out first.” Jungwon suggested, a caring— yet concerned smile on his face. You felt better knowing he wasn’t entirely mad at you.

Not anymore, at least. He hated seeing you fight. You never fight. Not even with words. He hated it more that you got hurt.

“Okay…” You sniffled, wiping your eyes, careful not to touch the bandages that stuck to your face.

Jungwon seemed relieved when you stopped crying.

“Good. Now please, never fight again. You could’ve gotten even more hurt.” Jungwon gently took your hand in his.

“You also can’t fight.”

“Hey!” You widened your eyes, feeling the embarrassment seep in again.

“Sorry! But your timing was all off.” Jungwon sheepishly chuckled.

And you let it slide, knowing he was right.

Niki

When the fight broke out, Niki stepped back immediately, confused and surprised, not wanting to get in the middle.

He watched, wide eyed and a bit in awe seeing you fight. With how heavy you landed your punches, he wasn’t worried about whether you’d be the one needing a ton of bandages and possible medical help.

But he was worried about you getting into trouble for this and even though he was in awe, he didn’t like the sight of you being angry and aggressive like this.

Even if the other girl started it and technically, it would be self defense on your part.

After a few long second, Niki swallowed back a gulp, “okay, enough—”

He stopped speaking when he saw the girl’s boyfriend angrily stomping towards you, his fist clenched. Her boyfriend was planning to stop you himself.

Even if that meant needing to hit you to get you off.

Niki knew you could take this guy too. But you weren’t aware of your surroundings, only of your target.

Niki scoffed, picking up a decently sized rock nearby and raising it in the air as if he were about to throw it.

“Try it.” Niki projected his voice, causing the boyfriend— And you, to stop.

You saw what Niki was about to do— throw the rock at the guy. You quickly got up and ran to Niki, taking the rock out of his hand and fleeing the area with him.

Note 2: I'm sorry, Niki's was lowkey based off of a dream where it was on sight for everyone because someone ate the leftovers he saved.

[toomuchracket]

how about matty convincing d word girlie going to a football match with her?? (Maybe she doesn’t really like football that much, or even at all, idk?)

HA yeah ok so you and matty go for a little long weekend up the north-east to visit some of his family, and newcastle are playing at home on the saturday and before you go tim phones to say he's got tickets for all of you - you included. matty giggles when he tells you this, because any time he talks about football or watches it in the house your eyes just glaze over out of disinterest, despite your best efforts to pay attention, and he knows you'll wince at the thought of actually going to a match; you do, but quickly plaster on a hesitant smile and say "ok", and matty's like "you'll go? really?", and you're like "... yes. it would make you really happy, wouldn't it?", and matty kisses your head and says "it would, darlin', it would mean a lot to me if you were there", and you're like "so it's settled. i will go to the football". and matty's like "can you say that again? i need to film it and send it to your dad so he'll believe me when i tell him" - you point at him like "don't fucking push it, matthew", and matty laughs and takes your face in his hands to kiss you like "sorry, baby. thank you for doing this. i love you. it'll be fun", to which you're like "i love you too, and that's the only reason i'm ACTUALLY doing it. and i guess seeing your family will be fun, at least, lol". but as the weekend gets closer, you do actually start to get excited, just because matty's so hyped about taking his girl to see his team lmao (he is such a boy). he's like "try on one of my football tops to see if it fits, and you can wear it to the game. that would be cute", and you're a bit 😐 about the idea; that is, until you pull one of the black and white tops over your underwear and step into the living room to show matty, and he reacts by... literally pulling one of the sofa cushions over his lap and breathing heavily. your jaw drops like "babe you did not just get hard at the sight of me in a newcastle united shirt lmaoooooooo. it's that easy? wow", and matty groans into his hands like "shut up how else am i meant to react? the most beautiful woman on the planet, my beloved girlfriend, in MY football top? this is teenage wet dream material, sweetheart" - you go over to kiss him and say "well, if we have sex now with me wearing it, will that make it better or worse?", and matty thinks for a second like "better. i'll get it out of my system" lol.

and he's right, actually - a week later, when you appear in his cousin's kitchen with the same shirt visible under your coat, all matty thinks of is how cute you look lmao (but he does smirk a little bit when everyone says how sweet you are for wearing it, considering you did some arguably non-sweet things to him in it before lol). the actual day itself is quite nice; you all go for food and a couple of drinks before the game, during which you literally just share really cringe anecdotes about matty with his dad and brother, and then matty takes 948482 pics of you outside st james' park (and makes one his lockscreen) before you go in. he hugs you tightly before the game starts like "this is really special to me, sweetheart, thank you for doing this", and you're like "it's chill i actually am having fun lol". he stays holding you through the start of the game, too, because it's chilly, but pulls back to look at you in bewilderment when you hum along to the local hero theme as the players come onto the pitch; you're like "what? i've seen the film. it's good. so is the tune", and matty kisses you quickly like "you never fail to amaze me, honestly". anyway, the first half of the game is... kinda boring? nobody scores, there's not a lot of action, and the most exciting thing is you nearly burning your tongue on a bovril at half-time lol. it picks up in the second half, though - you spend the first few goal attempts looking and smiling at matty getting really into it, because he's so cute and animated, but then the tables turn and you catch him grinning at you when you swear at a near miss from newcastle. when they finally do score, you both cheer, and matty gets so hyped that he picks you up - well, he tries to, in the limited space between rows of seats lol. you have to ask him to clarify ref decisions at bits (fuck if i know what constitutes a yellow card btw), which he RELISHES doing, explaining them and kissing your cheek when you're like "ok cool. i see". in the end, newcastle win, and when the home support stands go into joyous uproar you're a part of it, hugging matty and tim and all the rest of the family as if you were an avid fan lmao; matty also probably tries to fully make out with you in excitement and just general happiness that you're with him, which you indulge in briefly before being like "come on, we need to move now so the people behind us can get out lol". but you continue the making out in the smoking area of the pub you all pile into to celebrate the win, matty like "this has been one of my favourite days ever, sweetheart. i'm so grateful for you, and even more in love with you, honestly" - you're like "i love you! and i really have enjoyed myself. don't think i could do it every week, in fairness, but i had fun. thanks for bringing me, baby". and matty's like "anytime, darlin'. and feel free to borrow the top anytime, too. in fact, i'd encourage it" lol <3

[queenofbaws]

Top 5 favorite Grishaverse characters! I am curious if they will all be crows!;)

oh LORD sldkjflksdjf i am SO deep in the grisha pit right now, lmaoooOOOOO if anyone notices a pattern in my picks, no you don't 🙏🏻 (also i have not watched any of the show, i've strictly been a book girl so far :P)

kaz brekker. i mean. obviously. obviously. obviously. the "if i couldn't walk, i'd crawl to you" bit ALONE, like. my GOD. don't get me started on the bathroOM SINK SCENE AHHHHHH and the GLOVES?! i just. leigh bardugo was personally targeting me with kaz's creation, that's all i'm saying.

the darkling. look. i know. i get it. i understand what having these two as the first two suggests about me. i do. but. i'm just saying. if i had been the sun summoner, uh. things. things would've been. different. soRRY EVERYBODY ELSE!!! mysterious and dangerous man with the power of shadows and sad grey eyes presents me with a pretty black coat and tells me i'm special, that's game over.

inej ghafa. oooh if i could marry inej i would 😭 she kicks so much ass, she takes so little shit, she goes through SO MUCH and endures SO MUCH and still manages to find the best in people and her situations. i just...............i just want the world for her.

jesper fahey. who, i ask, in their right mind, DOESN'T love jesper?????????? the gunslinging! the sweet talking!!!!! the jokes!!!!!!!! thE VULNERABILITY THE MOMENT HE SEES HIS DAAAAAAD!!! i am firmly of the opinion that jesper would be the best hugger out of everyone in the whole franchise, and i cannot, and will not, be swayed from that position. every time he shows up i'm delighted, idk what to tell you.

genya safin. i do believe she utilized girl power by poisoning ravka's king, i know this is a hot take and i will not be taking criticism at this time. skdlfj for real though, i am a Big Fan of when characters take their pound of flesh, and "i am not ruined, i am ruination?" SHIVERS. (plus i think tailoring is such a cool grisha ability ahhhhhHHHHH)

[someoneihavelovedbutneverknown]

PROJECT DAYDREAM

HELLO. YOU ARE INVITED TO JOIN A ROLEPLAY PROJECT BY THE NAME OF PROJECT DAYDREAM.

PROJECT DAYDREAM WILL BE A RECREATION OF THE ICONIC STORYLINE OF THE DREAM SMP, WITH YOUR OWN CHARACTER HAVING THE PROSPECT OF TAKING THE PLACE OF A CHARACTER FROM THE ORIGINAL STORY.

FOR MORE INFORMATION, DM ME [Spore] ABOUT ROLES.

I WILL BE UPDATING ROLES AS THEY ARE TAKEN BELOW AND THE CONFIRMATIONS WILL BE IN THE WEEK BETWEEN OCTOBER 1ST AND 7TH.

REQUIREMENTS:

You will commit to your role. Once you tell me what role you want there is a very little chance I’ll change it so you better be happy with your choice.

A general knowledge of the role you’re playing. If you’re playing Wilbur or Ranboo’s character, you should know that you’d be playing their ghost version and revived version if they get revived; if you’re playing Fundy you may want to make yourself familiar with his cannon nightmares.

A light attitude! This whole rp thing is supposed to be fun, and if somebody is doing anything that makes you uncomfortable or threatening you, come to me immediately.

GENERAL OVERVIEW:

We will be ideally going through the entire DSMP storyline, from the start to end. You’re welcome to change plot lines to create an alternate timeline, but it is crucial to communicate that with everybody (especially me) to ensure that everybody is on board with it. This is a great time to fuse your character making and playing abilities with your knowledge of your blorbo!

To word it a bit better, you’re creating an original character who will take the role of a specific DSMP character.

Let’s say I create this character called Elle Woods (i’m a basic bitch okay), and she’s in the role of Jack. She’s gonna go through his part of the story and essentially fill in all his role. She’ll be a part of all of Jack’s arcs, and I’d play her out. She doesn’t have to do everything by book, but that’s specified above. Also, your character doesn’t have to be exactly like the original role’s character by any means. Certain things that are species specific such as the enderwalk can be either adapted to your character or even taken out or substituted (I have my limits, but you gotta talk to me before we both know them).

When is the last time to register?

OCTOBER 1st

The rp will be starting on the 7th of October, and I will be letting you guys know your roles in that week, giving you a week to prepare. Use it.

EXTRA INFORMATION:

You need to make a new blog for this

All the role playing will be happening here on Tumblr, and you’ll be doing reblog chains

There is no Discord bc I don’t have it and idk if my parents are cool with me getting it (strict parents amirite), but if you wanna make a server that’s cool with me but please check with me beforehand seeing as I am kinda modding for it

This is open for everybody, no matter the rp experience! I’ve been in a few rps myself (though this is my first time running one), and I’d love to see some people branch out their horizons! It’s all about good fun

You’re welcome to play multiple characters if you’re willing to dedicate to it! Just DM me about it like everything else :D

In no way am I or this project associated with Dream, the actual Dream SMP, or any of the ccs involved. I am just a fan with an itch to rp and to watch ppl rp.

I am not planning on involving Tales From The SMP, but if the person playing Karl’s role or anybody else would like to organize it separately from the main project then be my guest

Oh yeah this ain’t gonna be clean by any means lmaoooooooo (if you really wanna pull a sex scene i’m not against it just please tell everybody that ur gonna do it for our collective sanity)

As a second to the thingy above, if you REALLY wanna play out a sex scene, it is highly advised you keep it to the DMs unless it’s agreed on that it’s…central to the plot ig…if everybody who’s on board with the project in the end doesn’t mind it, then cool, but please check with everybody. Better safe than sorry.

“Spore how tf do we communicate without a discord-“ if you really need to talk to everybody at once, make a post and tag everybody in it

If you have any specific needs or concerns (sex repulsed, trauma from certain topics, etc) please communicate that with me so that we can create a fun roleplay experience for everyone. We can get into technicalities when you DM me about it, but I will likely share it as an announcement to the entire group.

(@mean-gills @championofapollo @jinxneedssleep @apricityxys @medlabmech i’m just tagging y’all for signal boost and sign up bc nobody seems interested and i’m sad)

ROLES THAT ARE TAKEN (this will be updated as more people receive roles, and I’ll be linking their urls so if you wanna wrestle your blorbo outta their hands I don’t have to be the messenger. be nice kids):

Phil - me

Charlie - me

Sam - me

Techno - @apricityxys

Tommy - @mean-gills

Ranboo - @mean-gills

Wilbur - @championofapollo

Dream - @chocolate-milk

Niki - @azurecake16

Quackity - @azurecake16

Tubbo - @epicaxolotls

Eret - @x-ca1iber

Schlatt - @epicaxolotls

BBH - @chocolate-milk

Fundy - @chocolate-milk

[ad-caelestia]

would you mind sharing your experience with precognition and clairivoyance?

uhhhsjdf;lksda i'm scared, i don't want to sound foolish but i really do wanna tell SOMEONE so i guess the internet is as good a place as any

it's mostly little things like wanting to roll a 19 on a d20 and then it happening; or wanting to see a specific kind of car like i have shared here before.

last night made me laugh though - my partner and i were watching a youtube video about the whole, forever stew thing and he was so interesting in trying something like that and i was like "eh idk" and minutes had passed but i could just "feel" him "looking" at me (he was playing on his phone not paying me any mind) so i was like "FINE i'll try the freakin soup!" and he just burst out laughing like how did you know i was still thinking about it? couple minutes later, he is watching a video about magic the gathering and i always tease him about how players say "does it see it?" so of course, i'm like "he's about to talk about how he 'sees' it" and i'm sure you can guess the very next words out of his mouth.

my bf said "you must be sensitive to psychic damage" lmaoooooooo

anyways, that's what has happened over the past 24 hours. i could go on and on about "prophetic" dreams and other strange predictions but my supposed intuition is what got me back into witchcraft after having abandoned it for many many years. kinda makes me want to get back into divination with like, a pendulum.

[trashlie]

Hi!!💖 Have you ever read Seasons of Blossom? I started it some months ago and now I'm literally obsessed, it's so good! It's sweet, yet tragic, and overall super enjoyable. The characters are very likable and it made me cry so much (both for joy and for sadness lol)

Ohohoho you must know me well for this recommendation because you are right - it is SO good! In fact... let me show you how much I love this one 😅

I bought the Spring box set in Korean lmaoooooooo

Seasons of Blossom is, hands down, one over my favorite webtoons and I absolutely recommend it go everyone! You are very correct in how it manages to be sweet AND tragic. I'm behind on Winter because, frankly, I'm not good with things I love ending, but I just know I'll binge and catch up soon!

Something I really love about this series is the way all of the characters are, in some way, connected, whether it's because their friend groups overlap or relatives or something drawing them in, so it's never truly goodbye when we move on to the next season. I have definitely cried a LOT. Summer is just.... lmao look just trying to talk about it has me tearing up. Summer is very personally relatable to me, in how thick and choking the summer humidity is, and how it held such a painful, tragic story. And I know some people have issues with Autumn but I personally have a soft spot for angry, wounded girls lol

I even started the kdrama and despite some of the changes they made to the story, I was really enjoying it! I just had tp stop because while it was well done how they tied in Spring and Summer, my heart couldn't take it and I needed to take a break and I just haven't steeled myself lol

(Fair warning, because I think it's important to let potential readers know, Summer heavily deals with loved ones still struggling to come to terms with the suicide of someone they loved. I think it's incredibly well done; it's empathetic and understanding, it doesn't downplay the grief or confusion, or what compelled someone to make that choice. It's just also such a heavy, oppressive topic. I lmao binged it and just sobbed through the night lol ;~;)

Anyway YES YES genuinely 10/10 for Seasons of Blossom from me. I love it SO much and recommend it to anyone and everyone! Each season tells their own story and I find the writing so good! Spring is set up to be a sweet, little cliche which would be fine, but the writing didn't give in to the cliches and I love how it turned out!

Waaaahhhh I'm delighted you guys are suddenly giving me webtoon recommendations, I love this! I love discovering a diamond in the rough or getting to crow about how much I love something!!!!! 🥰

[acescorazon]

Hiii! Just like the last person, i also started with the live action and then found your fanfics and ah! Im the one that commented on almost all your work djdj and told you i read it on my lunch break and the train! Thank god i speak spanish so people wouldn't read what was on my phone sbdbbd and yeah, thank god i was also wearing a mask on the train so no one would see me giggling like and idiot. But i wanted to tell you that omgg i love your stories how the hell your brain is so sexy but also funny i love how the smut its very silly also because we get to read buggy's thoughts. I didn't even like buggy on the live action till i saw the fanarts and i was suddenly like "you know what? He actually has pretty eyes..." and then here i am with a massive crush on a clown. I also started to ship buggy with mihawk because i have a thing for rare pairs and i was like you know what they would be hot but i was only imagining them like the live action BUT THEN YOUR FANFICS and now im on episode 7 of the anime cause i just want to understand better, like i love your crocodile but i dont even know how he is so yep, im on the anime nfnfnf and im here to tell you that you are amazing, seriously, i read your stories at night, at morning, when i finish my work bfnfj like i became obsessed with the ot3

Hi i remember you lolllll i replied to your comments this morning :) honestly it blows my mind that you'd read them in public, i could never have that bravery LMAOOOO. BUT STOPPPPP I'M LITERALLY AN IDIOT LMAOOOOOOOOOOOO. i think i said this at the end of my most recent fic but like i'm really out here just writing the most unrealistic ass smut sometimes. sometimes its just plain STUPIIIDDD lmao. but i do fancy me a good laugh but i never verge off into Crack territory lol. The actor does have really nice eyes, doesn't he???? i'm a clown f*cker tho so i was always going to simp for h- ANYWAYSSSSSS. @here i am with a massive crush on a clown. LMAOOOOO? First time???? LOOK L I S T E N. Honestly. i'm a Cross Guild girlie at heart so for me this is a buy one get two free deal but i swear to god Mihawk/Buggy IDKKKKKK. IDKKKK BABESSSSS. idk those two have the potential to have the messiest relationship yet and plus they're hot like you said LMAOOOOOO. LISTENNNNN LISTENNNN I'M THE BUGGY SIMPPPPP (jk there's probably someone who loves him more) AND WHEN I TELL YOU THERE'S JUST SOMETHING ABOUT THAT MANNNNN. JUST HES. *CHEF KISS* he's delicious, tasty, and PATHETIC. HES SO FUNNY AND DUMB AND I LOVE HIM SOOO MUCH. His debut episodes/ Episode 46 which is like 'Little Buggy's big adventure' is honestly the funniest shit to me and like they're my comfort episodes. Also like i said in the prev ask Alabasta is just my comfort arc for so many reasons lolololol Mainly bc my fave character appears and so does Croco and i love baroque works with a passion. (nobody asked.) it may not be everyone's slice of pie, but it's mine :))))

ANYWAYS LMAOOOOOOOO. Trust me bestie the way i write Crocodile isn't a headcanon LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. You'll see when you get there aljsldjasldjasldkajsdasd. If anything i typically go light on my depiction of him bc he's hngngnngngngngngn. Yeah, he's Crocodile alright LMAO. Not much of a spoiler but i'm here to tell you that Oda is starving us in terms of Cross Guild content, but have no fear jlkjsljdlkasjdaks i'll take one for the team. ANYWAYSSSSSSSS.Thank you again for the really nice message dear, i really appreciate it and i hope you end up actually liking the show a lot and don't have to watch 9845840850948509485098450840548094850948 episodes to think it's got any sort of appeal LMAO. THANK YOU AGAIN X30000 But know this: the moment Cross Guild debuted i knew...I KNEW i had to write for them. I knew i had to write Buggy in every scenario possible, and i'm working on it.

[fluffypotatey]

Leverage ep 9

No pre-game thoughts, y’all, we going straight into this bitch!

[spoilers. you’ve been warned]

The Snow Job - Reaction

Oooooh synopsis is interesting 👀

OH???? Cop forcing a POC family out of their house so some corporate real estate can take it????? NO IM NOT MAD HUSH

NVM I AM MAD

ACAB BITCH

YES BABE FUCK THEM UP

PINCH THEM

Oh shit we talking about Hurricane Katrina???? More like hurricane tortil—*gunshots*

take a shot every time someone mentions having kids to Ford lmaoooooooo (*cough* so sorry for your loss dude, honestly that sucked *cough*)

oh ho ho! flashback trauma

“no just the cookies” never change Parker

Is Ford….hungover???? Bro why (she asks, knowing damn well why)

oooooooooh Sofie’s mad 🫢 Ford you in deep shit

Wait, so what is a luge????

ok i am sensing an intervention for Ford this episode

extreme intervention

OH THE RACECAR ICE TUNNEL DEATH THING THATS A LUGE

yeah? yeah, i think that’s it

Eliot, why are so acting like a dork you’re gonna make me fall for you T^T

Parker, never change <3 love you

ELIOT WHAT IS THAT PHOTO

NOT THE HUG

wowwwwwww, gross ew

even more gross

like i already hate this contractor/real estate family but now i’m just gagging

emo Denis 😂

intersting 👀 why are their comma weird 👀

totally not worried. nope. all will be well :)

nvm Denis you’re also gross

HE IS A FUCKING INCEL I KNOW IT IN MY HEART

YES DENIS EXPOSE YOURSELF YOU ASSHOLE

Ford, I am worried about you

Eliot let Hardison talk 😠

cops???? again???? why would they listen, they didn’t do shit

APPLE PIE?????

same Parker

take a shot every time Ford reaches for a drink

i am currently terrified of deranged Ford

prediction: I want Alec as the doctor

gross part 5

oh shit the popo????

oop just realized i spelled Dennis wrong

ACAB

WE CAN DO WHAT????? TO HER WHAT

Eliot, you’re so cute

Retzings Racketeering…..Racketeering Retzings…..Rocket….Racketeering…..Retzings….guys, i think i cracked the code

Sofie: *trying to give Parker acting advice….she is failing*

THEY ARE NOT DOING ROCK PAPER SCISSORS TO INJECT A CORPSE 😂😂😂😂

dennis you’re so rude

YES THE TRIO IS TOGETHER

IS PARKEE GOING TO— OMFG

she’s so mad lmao

YES INTERVENTION TIME

Does ‘skip some rope’ mean what I think it means????

ooooooooooooh family drama 👀

damn Pam looks very similar to Parker

OH WAIT I KNOW IT WAS YOU PARKER

FAMILY DRAMA INTENSIFIES 💕👀💕👀

the boys are fighting 🥰

LMAO GET WRECKED BITCHES

HEY WHAT WAS THAT FLASHBACK FOR

Ford, i love you (please drink healthy)

oooooooh irony is a bitch and i love her

awwww they gave the house to the family 🥺🥺🥺🥺

“Give me a reason to stay” THE AUDIBLE GASP FROM MY MOUTH

General Thoughts

Honestly love this episode. Got worried a little bit in the beginning bc Ford was acting concernly unwell. Also, it’s funny how much I need to remind myself that the gang’s jobs always end well because I am so used to the opposite kind of heist story. The Nate/Sophie content was 🤌🤌🤌🤌 *chef’s kiss* Eliot was fucking adorable (he confuses me beyond no end, his backstory is so wild, tell me your PAST I WANNA KNOW SO BAD—) Hardison is beautiful and clever as always and Parker, my queen, was her unapologetic self 🥰

so yeah, great episode, on to the next 👀

[akkivee]

watched the bat vs mtr stage!!!!! here’s the tentative script if you wanna read it full too!!!!!

anyway here’s the stuff that had me screaming!!!!!

i still hate the way kuukou’s written, but what the stage did do was take a majority of kuukou’s development, which primarily happened before he formed bat, and fit it into a linear, easy to follow, format for the stage. not something i particularly agree with but i understand why they did!!!!!

i still don’t understand why they removed his compassion tho lol

they started to set up parallels between kuukou’s arrogance and jakurai’s arrogance back in track 3 and i’m happy to see it come together here in bat vs mtr

on that note, wow!!!!! sensei was kind of an asshole lmao!!!!!

nah like you look at these lyrics and man!!!! sensei really had just written off his and hitoya’s friendship in this play!!!! damn dude!!!!

hitoya displayed a degree of levelheadedness his canon counterpart didn’t; here in the play, hitoya is willing to admit he’s changed as well and maybe jakurai’s change wasn’t the only reason they fell apart. interesting stuff

sensei’s dancing in mtr’s new group song is 🥵🥵🥵🥵

kuukou was not in the wrong for this btw lmao

*cries* bat haiyuu chemistry is too good genuinely

i personally think it’s always a little weird when doppo’s the one to not notice how sensei’s feeling. like both hifumi and doppo are sensitive to jakurai’s emotions, doppo just stays quiet about it because he doesn’t think it’s his place to say anything. but i digress lol

i love!!!!!! how hifumi’s actor changes his voice!!!! when he puts on the jacket mid sentence!!!!! it’s having both the audio AND visual that’s setting me off lol!!!!!

kuukou: *beating up an entire host club* stop crying jyushi we’re not doing anything illegal!!!! 😈

the way jyushi dramatically introduced himself due to his nerves and the proud way kuukou smiled at him!!!!!!!!!! 💜💜💜

kuukou @ dohifu: oh i’ll give you a reason to fight us 😈😈😈

me:

between kuukou fighting everything that breathes in this play and hitoya yelling at jakurai that their fight wouldn’t be meaningless, there’s like a reason to fight thing going on that’s making me curious about fp vs mtc lol

LOL WHEN THE COPS SHOWED UP AT THE HOST CLUB JYUSHI ACTUALLY PICKED KUUKOU UP LONG CAT STYLE AND WADDLED HIM OFF THE STAGE HELP

AND JYUSHI DRAMATICALLY CRYING HES GOING TO DIE ALONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET AFTER HE AND KUUKOU GOT SEPARATED UNTIL HITOYA HAPPENED TO FIND HIM IS TOO FUNNY IM DYING

kuukou: *stumbles across jakurai after his battle with hitoya* hell yeah!!!! fight me and if i win, you have to buy me food!!!!!

jakurai: *passes out*

kuukou: bro what i didn’t even do anything🧍‍♂️

hitoya actually had work in shinjuku and didn’t just come to beef jakurai lol so we’re treated to courthouse rock where jyushi cheers hitoya on his case lol

DOHIFU HAVE A REALLY GAY NUMBER ABOUT HOW THEIR HOME IS THEIR SANCTUARY AND KUUKOU TIED UP IN SAID HOME TELLS THEM TO SHUT UP AND TO STOP SINGING IN FRONT OF HIM LMAOOOOOOOO

the way they characterised jakurai’s war trauma as a storm and hitoya’s revenge as a flame!!!!! bright and dark!!!!!! bright!!!!! dark!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—

jyushi pulled out hitoya’s backstory from hitoya and we get a really sweet number about jyushi’s hero worship towards hitoya 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 and how jyushi wants to be the one to save hitoya this time 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

what had me yelling was how they took hifumi’s feelings about honobono and applied it towards getting jakurai to open up towards reconciliation!!!!!!!!!!! some relationships you have to fight for hifumi said!!!!!!! goddamn they really made sensei face hitoya!!!!!!! i love it!!!!!!!!

and the fact we still get to hear hifumi’s feelings about honobono!!!!!!! they had to keep mtr drama light because bat’s drama wasn’t as devastating as mtr’s in the battle album and the more equal stakes are a great call!!!! but yay!!!!!! hifumi’s complex feelings about honobono!!!!!!!!!

kuukou ‘playing’ the bad guy to get jakurai to fight hitoya 😫😫😫😩😩😩😩🙏🙏🙏👌👌🙏👌👌👌🙏

LOL at the end of it all during the redux stuff we were treated to jyushi sexy dancing in front of the crowd and kuukou bodying his teammates they’re so funny 💜💜💜💜💜💜

overall a fantastic play!!!!!! very clean storytelling with a few choices i prefer over canon!!!!! godspeed hypstage thanks for the banger!!!!

[sharksa-shivers]

We've fucked around with ideas where some sections of the shadowcult basically worship Demon Drop like a God...So uhhhh that's what i was going for here, where The Trio were like tasked with finding some missing people and are having to deal with a Shadowdemon Churchcult cuz...Yeah fdshfdshjfdhjfdhjfd...Idk if the idea is still a go rn but i really fucking love this interaction here so ima post it anyway...

-------------------------

(We see Max captured and chained up pretty heavily to a pole…Max seems very bored as the shadowpriest is getting things ready for the sacrifice…And as the other church members look for Sharky and Kristy…Max is thinking of ways to get out of the chains, his fingers too intwined in the chains to do much…Max is thrown off however whenever the shadowpriest comes over and dumps some flowers and shit on his head…)

Shadowpriest:(reading from a book and also dumping flower petals on Max's head)Dearly Darkness, please accept this offering of young blood. We humbly ask that you bring back our beloved Lord Demon Drop and also ask for Demon's to prosper…As our Lord Demon Drop has promise-

Max:(shaking his head rapidly, knocking the flower petals off, annoyed and being an asshole as he should be)Can you maybe fuckin move your scented candle flower shit the fuck away from me perhaps? Feel like i'm gonna sneeze everywhere, really fucking annoying…

Shadowpriest:(glares down at Max, full of hate that Max is unphased by)This is exactly why your demise will make a great gift to our Lord above…Demon Drop would be most proud of-

Max:(asshole mode engaged, smirking)Why not just buy him more shitty candles? I dunno, i feel like corpses aren't great gifts…You know what kinda books or shows he likes? Maybe that'd be the better option. OH. ALSO. I dunno if DD is the god or whatever to you but if he's NOT…Well i'm here to piss on your shit and tell you gods not real so…Ooooo, tough break man…

Shadowpriest:(glaring)An atheist i see…

Max:(nodding, grinning widely)Goddamn right i am. And i'm pulling this shit out for you and you alone, don't you feel special?

Shadowpriest:(dropping more flowers on and around Max, hateglaring)You and those other retched mortals you had alongside you will make excellent kindling…A wonderful sacrifice for a wonderful God, Lord and Savior.

Max:(laughing)CRINGE!!!!!! GOD, THAT'S SO FUCKING CRINGE HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!

Shadowpriest:(getting pissed)Why are you not afraid?? If you see no god as existing, how are you so jovial about facing death???

Max:(shiteating grin)Cuz i'm suicidal and i'm not giving you a fucking ounce of satisfaction. I will fucking die smiling and laughing out of sheer fucking spite, fuck you. (Spits on him)

Shadowpriest:(his hate intensifying, he storms past Max to go clean himself up from Max spitting on him, his tone angerfilled as he walks away)I will enjoy watching you break as you realize your existence is over… ------------------------- Max usually isn't an asshole to normalass religious people but if they're a shadowdemon cult asspirate? Yeah, he'll bust out his fedora for that shit lol... Idk, i just like all the snarkyass shit Max says literally in the face of death. Max legit would die smiling and laughing out of spite, he would. The mans unhinged so yknow lmaoooooooo

[cosmictapestry]

Maximum devastation B25 and C3, if you think they’d work together

25. put a collar on that man

and

3. hand guiding

lmaoooooooo okay you asked for it. you asked for it

warning for *gestures broadly at dream*

this is a loose sequel to the first collar prompt

prompt list here

When Lucienne walks into the room, Lord Morpheus is already there, and he is kneeling naked on the floor, and he has his collar on, and there are tears in his eyes. Lucienne takes a deep, measured breath, and her eyes don't stray from his face. "My lord?"

"Lucienne," he says, his voice scratchy, and he says nothing else.

"Tell me what you need," Lucienne doesn't move or let her eyes wander. They have never done this before, him naked and her fully clothed, have hardly even spoken about it. She doesn't know what he's thinking.

Her lord shifts and swallows and his eyes fall to the floor in something like shame, or deference, or painful desperation. "I need to be yours," and his voice trembles, and his shoulders do, too. "Please."

Lucienne still does not move.

"I need," he grits his teeth, fighting the inevitable tears, his nails biting into his thighs. Lucienne has never seen him quite like this before. "I need to be—nothing else. Only yours. Please."

Lucienne releases a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. And she can see it now, the rigid tension in his frame, the tears that are more pain than anything else. He is Everything, he is God, he is begging to be hers. "Alright," she murmurs, and it comes out distorted, wrecked, overwhelmed. "Relax, my love."

He does, and he sobs, his shoulders hunching forward. Lucienne approaches him slowly, and he does not raise his head to look at her. "Morpheus," she says, very quiet, and she waits until he tips his head back to see her, all the reeling painful confusion of the collective unconscious in watery blue eyes. "We need to talk about this."

His face crumbles a little, his hands spasming and drawing red lines across his skin. "I know I am safe with you," he says, like this is something he must beg for. "I know you will not let me disappear, I know you will not hurt me—"

"I am glad you know that," Lucienne interrupts, stern now. "But I cannot read your mind, my friend, and I refuse to hurt you accidentally." This quiets him, steadies him. Lucienne kneels in front of him and his eyes never leave hers. "I am going to tell you what we will do. You are going to listen to me. Alright?"

His expression has grown hazy, the way it does when he slips into this space with her, their own little realm. He inclines his head, syrupy slow. "Yes," he says before she can tell him to use his words.

"Very good," Lucienne tells him, and he shivers. "I am going to touch your hand now," she says, and with his understanding nod she lays her fingertips feather-light on the back of his hand. He is wound so tightly in anticipation he nearly moans. "You are going to take my hand, and you are going to guide it where you need me to touch you."

Lord Morpheus frowns at this with apparent displeasure, but he does not argue. He understands, at least, how much worse she could make this if she did the wrong thing. "Okay," he agrees. He swallows hard. "But—would you kiss me? Please?"

Lucienne blinks against her tears. "Yes, love, of course," and she leans forward, and she brushes her lips against his. He leans into her, a relieved little breath like a sob between them, his lips soft and salty and trembling. "You're alright," she whispers, and she leans her forehead into his.

Her lord takes her hand then, holds it in both his own, cold and shaking. He traces her fingers and her palm and he squeezes, just feeling her, until he lifts her hand to his face and presses it to his cheek.

Lucienne holds his face the way she's been directed, and his tears spill down over her thumb, and she leans back to look at him, his fear and agony and beauty. "Very good," she says again, and he is fully hard, straining in his lap. "Sweet thing."

He nods, frantic, vehement, and his jaw clenches. His hands slide down her forearm, ghost over her wrists, feeling. He draws her hand down, then, has her touch the jut of his jaw, the straining tendon of his neck, the sleek leather of the collar. His lips are parted, his eyes closed, his hips rocking nearly imperceptibly. "Yours," he croaks.

She slides one finger under the collar to pull it a little tighter, the way he's asking her to. His eyelids flutter, a rushed little breath escapes him. To her surprise, he speaks again, tearfully. "You are good to me," he says. "You are—so kind."

Lucienne shushes him before he can make her cry. "None of that, now," she whispers. "How do you feel?"

"Yours," he slurs, and he draws her hand down along the ridge of his collarbone while he trembles and sweats. "Feel like yours."

Despite her best efforts there are tears running down her face and dripping onto her trousers. She doesn't say anything, just watches the slide of dark skin over white as he pulls her hand down the center of his heaving chest, down the flat plane of his belly, down to where he is hard and aching.

His eyes are open again—and what a picture the two of them must make, how overwrought they must look with their matching tears. Lucienne watches his face while he wraps her hand around him, watches the sharp little sob that catches on his collar, the knitting of his brows. "Just like that," she tells him, feels the shift of silky skin as he works her hand up and down, loose and slow. "Very good."

Her lord moans, high and breathy, and his expression contorts in sudden anguish, and he leans forward to hide his face in the crook of her neck. The hand not guiding hers takes hold of her other one and brings it up to run through his hair. Lucienne takes it in stride, keeps petting him after his hand drops back to his side, keeps stroking him, guided by the big hand over her own.

He trembles and moans and leaks in her grip, and his tears soak into the collar of her jacket. When he spends it is with a series of ecstatic, tearful gasps, spilling and pulsing in her hand. His body jerks through it and shakes for long after, and he pants and he sobs, "Lucienne."

Lucienne holds him the way he needs in the aftermath, and she whispers to him, and she cries for him, because after all of this the pain will not be gone and he will not be free and she will not have saved him—but he kisses her like she has.

[heavyhitterheaux]

You followed their gaze to see Jack in one of your many bonnets to protect his curls and your apron that was covered in flowers and you couldn’t help but to stifle a laugh. He’s in his housewife era y’all 🤭

“Trust and believe if it has anything to do with you or the little one he was going to find a way to get it done.” AS HE MOTHAFUCKIN SHOULDDDDDD 😌

“No. Immediately no. Call Jessica.” I’m sorry this js make me fucking laugh so loud 😭

The four of you had now been sitting in traffic for a total of two hours and you were about to lose your shit. You didn’t think she would be coming any time soon since this was your first, but you had to keep in mind that you had to be prepared for anything to happen. TWO HOUR TRAFFIC?!? Oh hell fuck nawwww

“WHAT?! IN MY CAR?!” BITCH?! Do you want this baby or not?!? 🤨 YES IN YO FUCKIN CAR

“Is that….? Is that HER HEAD?!” DAMN THIS BABY IMPATIENT ASF FUCK! 😭 js like her daddy

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN IS THAT HER HEAD?! WE’RE NOT READY FOR HER YET!” Clay exclaimed while looking at all the traffic ahead of them. Clay more freaked out then YN 😂 like bby you ain’t got nun to worry abt!!

“I didn’t even do anything, you did all the work. She is gorgeous and looks just like you.” See respectfully no…if I JUST pushed the baby out & it got all this blood & shit on it AND YOU TELL ME IT LOOKS LIKE ME IMMA BEAT YO ASS!! Cause that’s mad disrespectful 😭 lemme at least clean the thing off first tf

“Except her forehead.” DEAD 💀

You were now resting while Caoimhe (pronounced Kweeva) was asleep on Jack’s chest who was sitting next to you. OMG HER NAME IS SO GORGEOUS 🥹

“We did. You don’t recognize that forehead?” Im Soo fuckin done 😂 Ik he feelin some way abt that forehead 😭

“She wants what she wants when she wants it. Just like her mother.” Uhhh unless you want another forehead joke, I suggest u keep quiet Megamind

“Caoimhe Margaret. I gave her Jack’s mom’s middle name so she’ll be less mad at him when we tell her. Her first name means beautiful in Irish” 🥹her name ughhh I’m in love. Not Jack tryna use his baby as a get outta jail free card 😭 yo mama still gon whoop that ass bby

You assume that she saw Jack and that was why.  OH NO SHE FINNA OPEN UP THAT BIG ASS MOUTH OF HERS HUH?!?

“Doesn’t matter because I have a crush on Y/N.” Stop it 🤭 *kicking & swinging feet*

But what you didn’t know was that when you and Jack were looking down at Caoimhe, she snapped a picture and decided to send it to TMZ. SEE THIS WHY HE DONT WANT U. YOU UGLY ASS LOWLIFE BITCH!! NO CLASS HAVIN ASS BITCH!!

TMZ: Looks like congratulations are in order for Jack Harlow and his mystery girlfriend! We have gotten word that he is now a father to a beautiful baby girl! More details to come as soon as we know more. I.Fucking.Hate.TMZ. LIKE DO YALL HAVE NO FUCKIN RESPECT!? Y’all some hoes HE JS HAD THE DAMN BABY, WHY THE FUCK YALL ALL UP IN THE DAMN BUSINESS!!

Mom- Do you have something that you want to tell me? Why is everyone calling me and telling me that you’re a FATHER? You better start explaining and you better start now. Ohhhh you in troubleeeeeee 🌚

REE YOU FUCKING ATE & HONESTLY IM NOT SURPRISED!!! 🫶🏽

Not you calling him Megamind 😭😭

And he did clean her off before he said that lmaoooooooo

Jack over here worried about his car but not the fact that his daughter wasn't waiting for ANYONE

She was like I wanna come out and I WANNA DO IT NOW IDC IF YOU NOT READY

YESS omg him using her as a get out of jail free card is SENDING ME

Anything to soften the blow I guess lol

And she was dead wrong for taking that picture and sending it to them

Jack is about to get REAL DISRESPECTFUL because she did it to them first

He not playing about his boo and his baby girl

MAGGIE AND BRIAN ABOUT TO WHOOP HIS ASS!