#Jacques LeBert

[friendlyneighborhoodkinkshamer]

I want a scene where the crew is on a job and they run into a hard-core sports nut who recognizes Eliot as Jacques LeBert or Roy Chapel and, while he could just say "oh man I get that a lot, I wish!" Or something to play it off, he can't help but admit to it because despite all his angst and trauma he LOVES the attention.

Hardison is annoyed that this week's clever identity is going to waste, and Eliot is barely usable in this grift because he's back in Mildly Famous mode

By the end of the episode Harry has a signed trading card

[onyxbird]

Eliot always wants to know what restaurant they plan to go to, and clearly has Opinions about their choices, even though he doesn't directly critique them to their faces. Hardison and Parker pretend not to know that the distinction between Eliot-approved restaurants and Eliot-annoying restaurants is correlated to which ones see them walk in and just preemptively make some room for the vigilante chef they know will follow versus those that try to call the cops on the dude invading their kitchen.

Although, realistically, I think Eliot would have dueling motivations of 1) wanting to meddle and make their date perfect but also 2) being appalled and wanting to shut down any restaurant that would allow food to go out to a customer after a stranger got in the kitchen and meddled with it. For one, because what other safety issues are they playing fast-and-loose with if they let outsiders get away with barging in and mucking around with the food? And second, because he probably knows way too many ways to surreptitiously poison food that regular restaurant staff wouldn't know how to spot even if they thought to watch for it.

So perhaps the dichotomy is "restaurants where Eliot has managed to set up a cover that allows him to 'legitimately' barge in and do this" (in some cases to bemused or enthusiastic acceptance; in others to the great annoyance of the actual chef) and "restaurants where Eliot has no plausible excuse for getting in the kitchen to intervene." (Plus a niche third category of "restaurants with stories swirling about the most opinionated, meddling health inspector ever who didn't actually touch any of the food but kept trying to give flavor advice backed by an implicit threat of a bad rating" from before Eliot figured out which covers actually worked for his purposes.)

The Mystery Chef who has some kind of arrangement with half the restaurants in Portland (Despite being rumored to have his own restaurant somewhere? Seriously, how does this dude have the time?!) is on the conspiracy boards alongside Roy Chappell, Kenneth Crane, and Jacques LeBert. There is more than one early-career chef in the area who insists that Mystery Chef taught at their culinary school, but still have absolutely no other identifying information for him beyond "Chef." Most restaurant staff think it's either an urban legend or a inside joke to play on the newbies... until Hardison and Parker happen to pick their restaurant for date night.

Eliot definitely tags along on Parker and Hardison’s dates to:

Keep them safe (fight in a locked off comedy frame, of course)

Pay any musicians around to play something the two of them will like, which isn’t necessarily classically romantic stuff

Break into kitchens at restaurants they might go to and take over cooking for them because he knows how they like their food, and if they’ve ordered something that they won’t like he can change it

[party-gilmore]

Hardison as a fairly popular twitch streamer and yeah people come to his stream because he's just so very entertaining, but also for his "weird roomates" who keep wandering into frame doing increasingly weird/dangerous/scary things and they have their own little fan group.

There's debates over whether he's dating either or both of them, then discourse over whether those debates are RPF or not. Parker is a rare guest because of her camera aversion, but some days she's feeling playful and will go about her day in the background in increasingly elaborate masks. Chat flipped their shit the first time the Big Scary But Still A Short King Guy wandered out of the kitchen with a apron on and arms full of food, cajoling Hardison into taking a break. Lot of "OMG??? He's DOMESTIC??? Did NOT expect that!!! In the chat.

This one time there was a literal attempt at a "home invasion" (read: some poor desperate fool took a hit out on Leverage) WHILE Hardison was midstream. Chat FREAKED out, "HEY what's THAT OH MY GOD LOOK AT YOUR WINDOW!" "SOMEONES TRYING TO BREAK INTO YOUR HOUSE, MAN!!!" and Hardison just turned and looked and shrugged and said "nah, don't worry about it y'all, anyway so this puzzle almost made me-" and they get inside and chat is FLIPPING THEIR SHIT then suddenly Domestic Grumpy Not Scary At All Teddy Bear is in frame and proceeds to kick the SHIT out of these guys, and Hardison is just Stan Lee in the Spiderman record store fight not even paying attention while chat is LOSING IT

"omfG!!!"

"NO WAY"

"...Alfred, call The Guy."

"OKAY WE'RE DEFINKTELY ADDING SCARY BACK INTO TEDDY BEAR'S NAME, RIGHT?"

"hey uh I kno I'm new here but isn't that Roy Chapel?"

"HES NOT EVEN BREAKI G A SWEAT?!?!"

"uNNFF!!!"

"THAT HAIR!!! LOOK AT IT BOUNCE"

"that's not the only thing bouncing 0///0 #godblesssweatpants"

"@buzzfeedunsolvedjunkie no way man, that's clearly Jacques leBert"

[faorism]

[#fictional rpf discussed] who is this scruffy buff white man? conspiracy board has one dedicated fan who crossed over from the hockey rpf fandom, and for the past decade they have been posting like hundreds of thousands of words worth of fic featuring jacques lebert being shipped with roy chapel and/or kenneth crane. they started the tags on ao3, their fic established some of the more defining headcanons about each, and once it started catching on, they and their hockey rpf friends organized a get singer!au lebert a permanent jig fest & fundraiser that became the annual scruffy buff white men charity fanwork auction.

sbwm fandom lost its goddamn shit at the prospective addition to "canon" in the form of a portland-based chef. the fandom nearly imploded in debate over whether this should be taken in as a new person or if all the post-sports-injury restaurant-based aus were coming true.

[ganseyboii]

how is eliot never recognized?? like he was a baseball star, a hockey star, and a country music star, all with real fans?? but no one ever makes a connection between roy chappell, jacques lebert, and kenneth crane? not to mention all the people he’s ever hit?

imagine you turn on the tv one day and the guy who took out your security with one hand behind his back was singing at a country music festival. what would you do??

[jack-the-bear]

Can you explain your user a bit pls?

I'm assuming you mean my username? So Jacques LeBert was an alias Eliot Spencer used in The Blue Line Job. Pronounced "Jack," and he was affectionately dubbed by his fans, Jack the Bear. Leverage is my all time favorite show and Eliot Spencer is probably my all time favorite character, hence the username.

[stonecoldspaghetti]

One of them links to sports news once. Its an article about Roy Chappell or Jacque LeBert. Some people swear that's him, others insist it's a different guy. Someone suggests they might be relatives but no one can agree.

It gets worse when someone finds out about Kenneth Crane.

How many random women in LA, Boston, and Portland must have a story about this handsome, charming stranger who appeared out of the blue to flirt with them…before suddenly starting to talk cryptic, grumpy nonsense to himself and walking off in a huff?

[falcon-keys]

JACQUES (court métrage) from Isabelle LAURENT on Vimeo.

Avoir peur de vieillir quand on a 50 ans...

Avec Didier VINSON

Assistante réa : Aurélie RAOULL Scripte : Anaïs CORNO Directeur photo/cadreur : Grégory TURBELLIER Assistant cam : Raphaël APRIKIAN Chef electro : Cyriac LEBERT Chef machine : Lancelot GRANZIE Ingé son : Arnaud MOREL D'ARLEUX Compositeur & mixeur : Lucas SALVADOR Make up : Justine LAHCCEN-ROSELET Régisseur : Guillaume MONFRAIX Monteuse : Aline SAUTERON Etalonneur : Michel REYNAERT Making of : Aurélie VIAU

[party-gilmore]

okay but what was eliot’s stage name

and and

do the kenneth crane / roy chapel / jacques lebert conspiracy theorists ever catch on

Ajshhshshdjdj oh MAN it was probably something so fucking cheesy and cowboy sounding like fucking can I get uuuuuuhhhhhhhh

Dodge.

After his car. He named himself after a fucking hotrod for this. Shelley teased him for YEARS afterwards about it.

Dodge City, for the cowboy angle.

There's like. Spoofs out there with him named after Debbie Does Dallas but it's Donna Does Dodge City.

AND HELL YEAH LIKE I SAID IN THE TAGS SMALL BUT LOYAL FANBASE SO IT ALL STAYS ON THE ADULT FORUMS like nobody wants to doxx him for once the internet is a good place the running theory is that his employers keep finding out about his brief porn career and firing him so he has to adopt new identities because he keeps getting blacklisted from all these very public careers.

Hardison bout forgets all his Confused Feelimgs and has a minor panic attack when he realizes that these people have all successfully (AND LITERALLY!!!) pulled a Do The Butts Match? against his elaborate trail erasing, all solely because he didn't exactly add porn sites to his algorithm parameters.