#It's better than going 7+ seasons and trying to make us care about a random woman they got paired up with after 1 ep

[otakusapien]

Catching up on 9-1-1. I've said it before and I'll say it again. I'm not even that invested in Buddie as a ship, it's just legitimately the best writing choice

[septembersung]

@citadelofthestars You are in luck because I just overhauled our entire chore system for the new school year so this is all fresh on my mind.

Context: this was from the post about making chores fair for kids and not requiring more domestic labor of girls than boys or having sisters clean up after brothers but never vice versa.

The following sounds complicated but it’s not? It evolved organically based on what our house needs and fits into how I organize the rest of my life. And, ymmv based on kids’ ages, temperament, and varieties of neurodivergence. My kids are all under 11 and we homeschool and half of us are probably adhd, so we’re still learning skills and also in our space making messes a lot. I would also like to emphasize that I am so bad about chores. Hence the system. When we follow through… it’s amazing. And then we don’t and we start over again (distant screaming.)

We do chores 2-3 times a day on school weekdays (or… sometimes once… but that’s a rough day for cleanliness) and everybody helps at mealtimes. Everybody gives me an hour or a set number of chores on Saturday. We aim to have the house “Sunday ready” by dinnertime Saturday.

Morning chores: this is their chance to take care of their personal space: bed, desk, laundry tidy, that sort of thing. It’s part of general getting ready. After this, the big 3-4 kids help with animal chores (and gardens when applicable) except when they’ve fractured a bone like kid 4 currently has. In some seasons the big 3 will each have an easy first thing kitchen chore like “empty the dishwasher” but not usually during the first part of school year. Mornings are hard for us so we have to get into school routine fir a whole first.

Afternoon chores: By age and ability. Mostly, one-off jobs like change out laundry, put away your laundry, take out trash, entertain a little for 20 minutes so I can have free hands for a separate task, help make the afternoon snack, etc. (Our lives run in 20 minute increments it feels like. I have a timer for everything. It’s what keeps me on task.) I expect big kids (7+) to do 2-4 tasks in this time depending on what the tasks are and under 7s to do one or two things tops, with me. Laundry is a coveted job but the rule is you have to be able to read the label on the knob and reach the bottom of the washer. We’re always behind so I decide as we go what the next load is, and if it’s your basket you’ll be called to help me load even if you’re not big enough to do it independently. Everybody folds (except the 1yo. Because she thinks it’s a keepaway game.)

We have a basic laminated grid on the wall with a column for each kid and little chore stickers with Velcro buttons on the back. (Well, we will when I print and hang the updated version.) Stuff no one likes doing I assign in 2 month increments or more (for habit and technique building) like scrubbing the bathroom; things everyone wants to do, like dust mop, they trade off each week or so. My oldest is so possessive of his sweeping job it’s possible no one else will ever sweep that bit of floor again. But there’s so much else to sweep I’m not too worried tbh.

I try to reset the chart for changeable chores every weekend. In my new and improved version there’s a section for each chore time, and separate for meals, instead of one long column under your name, and you have two columns!, so you move your little chore sticker from “undone” to “done.” Also contemplating have a little sack of random chores to draw from, like a scrabble tile bag, because “contribute positively to the family” is our go to consequence for misbehavior.

Evening chores: This is when we “get in the zone”. Your zone is one specific area of the house you are responsible for. You can do it on your own as you like to stay on top of it or wait til during the fast zone tidy which comes right before or after dinner. And it is fast, like maximum 20 minutes and 10 is better. Big 3 kids rotate between dining room, living room, and main bathroom. Little kids share the playroom. Everybody helps in their own bedroom at the end for 5-10 minutes. I cycle through and help everybody as needed unless something urgent calls me.

Meal time jobs include: table, chairs, floor, dishes (load up or wash by hand.) We’re working up to include kitchen floor and counters as the big kids take on more responsibility for cooking. Again the big 3 kids rotate among the more skilled jobs, while the little 3 trade out what they help scrub and sweep and carry.

Saturdays the kids will do a more irregular job, like “clean out the van” (which is all hands on deck together) or a periodic job like “mop or vacuum your zone” or “scrub cabinets.” We mostly discuss these jobs each week depending on what seems most needed instead of having a specific thing on the chart. (In my improved version the Velcro buttons say “Saturday chore time” in the little Saturday section at the bottom.)

This is probably way more detail than you ever needed in your life, but here we are. Happy planning!

[unnecessary-dinosaurs]

Ok! I watched Chaos Theory! I have a lot of thoughts! There were things I liked a lot and things I wasn’t a fan of. I generally liked it but came away slightly underwhelmed. If you haven’t watched it yet please go do so!!! Support the show and the wonderful crew that put it together!!!

SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

WHAT I LIKED:

-MATEO!!! I literally loved him so much. A fantastic, simple character that doesn’t overstay his welcome or detract from our main characters. Great motivations and realistic backstory. Yeah. I really liked him. Yeah.

-Yasammy! Obviously they were amazing. They got to be cute and bubbly and gay but also their argument was so real and believable. Neither one of them is completely in the wrong. They are just two flawed people who’ve been through more than they can handle on their own. They need each other but not always in the way they might think. They were such a highlight this season. Can’t wait for more of them.

-This whole show just feels like a dramatic step up in visual storytelling from CC. The sets are beautiful and intricate, the lighting and textures are fantastic, and the directing is just really great. There are some really creative shots and transitions, and overall it just feels like more confident directing and storyboarding all around. (I specifically remember episode 7 being really great visually. Super fun stuff.)

-All the dinosaur action was great. Like next level shit. The way they keep finding creative ways to use these animals for action and suspense is very impressive. The raptors are genuinely scary. The Allosaurus and Pachyrhinosaurus were personal favs.

-Unlike Dominion, they actually showed what living in a world with dinosaurs is like- how people are adjusting to this new way of life, adapting to the presence of these animals, and keeping themselves safe. Totally what I wanted to see from Dominion, and Chaos Theory did it better within a single episode.

-There was some very well crafted suspense throughout this season. The mystery does a great job of constantly keeping you pulled in. Every time a question is answered, five more are asked.

-The darker tone is definitely welcome. The characters are older and they’ve experienced a terrible loss. The weight of the new world weighs on them and the audience in a very tangible way.

-This one isn’t really constructive but like. I just love Darius so much. He’s so perfect.

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE:

-Unfortunately I thought the character writing was significantly weaker than any season of CC. It was genuinely impressive how they were able to make me not care much about these versions of Ben and Kenji, my absolute favorite characters in CC. Before the characters felt like real, living people. Now, they just feel like fictional characters to me. Really good characters, yes, but still just characters. Maybe I’ll go into further detail about this in a future post. But yeah, overall it felt like the characters took a backseat this time around.

-I’m so sorry but I absolutely could not stand the new VA for Kenji. I’m sure he’s trying his best but he sounded uninterested and half-assed most of the time. Brooklynn’s new actor was… fine? Didn’t care for her either but she didn’t bug me the way Kenji did. Let’s start a GoFundMe to pay for Ryan to come back.

-Ok. Yeah. Not a fan of Darius being in love with B. Like, ok. It makes sense and it fits the plot well. But it just seems unnecessary. Darius can be devastated by her loss without it. Ehhh maybe they’ll handle it well in future seasons but. No. Not for me.

-Also didn’t like Daniel Kon’s death. I liked that they brought him back, but killing him felt undeserved. Like, he was the main antagonist for the first show, but you just kill him off in a random episode six years later? I think he deserved a little more reverence rather than reintroducing him for one episode and then quickly killing him for shock value once he’s served his purpose.

-WHY DID THEY GIVE BEN A GIRLFRIEND THAT BOY IS GAY AS HELL NOOOOO

[kassandragreyson]

Let’s talk about Jean Luc Picard and his fatherhood.

I know, it was said thousands time withing the franchise and by actors/characters and etc., but I want to explore the current Star Trek: Picard 3 season

Yeah yeah yeah, we all can pretend that this never happened and just assume that it is not canon, even though real canon without Rodenberry is impossible in anyway, but lets admit that we have this 3 season and live with that.

Its happening and honestly, I sort of like it. Sure, it is not the same vibe as tng, but hey, they had 7 seasons and full range movies to explore the characters while we have only short 3 seasons with 10 episodes each. This is not enough, but I give a huge credit for actors who are still trying to make it better and worth the time and resources. But in anyway, today it is not about capitalist bs and how it ruins our childhood lol.

Of course, giving Picard a son is a bald move, but honestly, so predictable. It is exactly what happened to Kirk when they introduced David Marcus. They wanted to give the character a new challenge, but at least they could have tried to be original. Trop that partners went through tough relationships (all these ups and downs between Picard and Crusher) and after 20 years it appears that one of them hid the child, wow shocking. *Sarcastic giggle*

But ok, that’s the Star Trek vibe and sort of expected move. It was done before, why not again but with a different outcome and atmosphere? What I do not really like is what they did to characters and their values.

I get it that Beverly cares for her son and wants to protect him at all costs. But Beverly I know would not do that. Yes, she is pretty much an independent lady, who does not need a “boyfriend” or maybe even husband. A partner - maybe. But unfortunately, Jean Luc could never be him as much as she wanted. He is way too much into his life just like her, so unless someone sacrifices their career or desires, it simply would not work. We have seen it; it did not work. They are two complete people with their own views on life, so we cannot expect them to push their boundaries and let their own selves go.

But hide Jean Luc’s child, pretending that he will drag the danger on him is hilarious. I mean, they all were in Star Fleet, they all knew the risks from the day one, Beverly knew the risks for Wesley when he joined Fleet and did not seem to have an issue with that.

I do not want to be mean or cruel but lets face it: she is a doctor in a future society, I will never believe that she did not calculate risks of this pregnancy and future outcomes in advance. The pregnancy was not a big surprise for her, you can not have sex and expect TV after. It is a baby if you do not use contraception or even if you use, it is still a baby to expect. My point is, if she accepted Jack and his birth, she should have accepted the risks for him as well.

Question is, why she decided to ruin all relationships with Jean Luc and live her “happily life” hiding Jack? I mean, that is too bs move for her character. She is so much better than that, better friend, better mom, better woman. It is not worth drama to picture her so selfish and ignorant.

Then it comes to Jack and all his “I do not want to see you Sir; you are not my father blah blah blah”. They all Picture Picard as someone who is horrible at fatherhood and sucks with kids. They all show him as “I do not need ANY family accept Star Fleet” and ect. But. There is but.

He is better that that. I do not want to say that he and his character must become a father, no, not all people want kids and a family and make all these sacrifices. And it was absolutely cool to draw Picard as a person who does not want kids and it is ok, it was a good line of his personality. It was. But now we have to face jack and deal with that.

Jean Luc Picard is the most caring for his family man. Whole crew of the Enterprise, his brother and nephew, Ro, random younger ensigns and other secondary characters. We have seen that while he does not feel comfortable with kids, he is pretty much paternal figure for all above.

I was thinking, why someone who is so good with being a father figure, would refuse to become a father one day? I do not think it is because he simply does not want it and that’s it. I think he has much deeper reasons than it appears and shown to us.

We know from season 2 that he had an internal conflict with love and being loved because he has witnessed a horrifying moment in his life (his mother) and it broke him so hard, that he was carrying all this weight through his whole adulthood.

So, what if being the father has its own roots as well?

I think it is all about the responsibility.

Think about it. Jean Luc is the top Capitan, he has to lead the best ship, he is the “golden boy” of the Star Fleet diplomacy and literary everyone is looking at him as a hero. A lot of stress comes with such honor. He cannot relax even with his crew, that is how much he is trying to be that person as everyone sees in him.  The only time when he is being himself if when he is alone. Even with his romantic partners it was hard for him to be true Jean Luc and not Capitan Picard all the time. Women within the Fleet and outside of it: they always have to share him and accept Capitan Picard as a third face in the relationships.

If such a man cannot allow himself to be real himself with non of his romantic partners, how we can expect him to want to become a father? That is what Jean Luc was thinking about. That he cannot be the Capitan for his child, he cannot play multiple character, not for his kid, not for a prospect wife/husband. He loves his found family, but god, he loves his life the way it is too. Jean Luc was not mentally ready for the child and he decided to leave this part of live aside, because he understood risks and consequent responsibilities too well.

But just because he let his fatherhood go, it does mean that he would not make a great dad.

Jean Luc is scared of kids only because of the coming with them responsibility, but it is same sort of challenge as anything else. Once it happens, you just go for it. And that what he would do if he would have a chance to.

I will never believe that he would abandon his kid, that he would refuse to see and help Bev, that he would not make changes in his own life. He risked his life because he had nothing to lose, only his own life, but if he would know about Jack, he would be mindful, because he would care for him. And it is not a sacrifice to start caring for someone and start to respect your life because of that. It is a life, that how it works.

Jack’s argument that Jean admitted in the pub few years ago that he does not need any other family, but Starfleet is nonsense. He did not know about him, how he could possibly say something else? He thought his life was straightforward. Well, it was not.

In season 7 tng “The Inner Light”, when Jean spent 40 years as Kamin, we have been shown, that even with all his ambitions and inner self, he made a great father when he got a chance to. He cared for his children, for his wife, raised grandchildren as well. He is a truly loving man and a father when he really wants it. He has never forgot about the Enterprise during these years, but he made a pretty good life with his family.

I do believe that his life as an officer brings all the risk on his head, but I also believe that if he would known about Jack, he would make it work.  

His character deserves better treatment than old 70s jokes of how bad he is as a father.

He is not the type of man who would asks his son to call him a Sir. He is a type that will bring a galaxy on your heads if you mess with his family and especially with his child.

[starkstruck27]

Tag game: Stranger Things Edition!!

I was tagged by my bestie @oopsiedaisiesbaby. Love you!!💚💚

1. Ride or die ship (your otp): Harringrove

2. Most annoying ship: Mileven

3. Second favorite ship: probably mungrove (bonus points if I get the best of both worlds and it ends up as harringroveson)

4. Favorite platonic relationship: Either stobin or elmax. They're both amazing <3

5. Underrated ship: gonna go with elmax again for this one. Or Keg Boys. I feel like they don't get as much love as they deserve.

6. Overrated ship: normally I would say steddie, but I also love them, too, so I'm gonna say ronance. I can see it, but at the same time... meh?

7. One thing I would change in canon: a lot of the random, unneeded deaths. Bob, Billy, Alexei, Benny, Barb, Chrissy? I feel like none of those needed to happen for the plot to move along, and even if they did, like they didn't have to make them like an "Oh well, they're dead :/" thing. Like, they didn't deserve that. And even if they didn't do that, the way the other characters reacted to the deaths was kinda shallow, too. Like Nancy losing Barb would broken my heart a lot more if they didn't use her mourning as a plot device to make her lose Steve and hook up with Jonathan.

8. Something canon did right: the character dynamics. The way they had the kids fighting over petty shit while bad things were happening, how Dustin didn't have a dad so he latched onto Steve as an older brother type positive influence, the way Hopper had to get used to being a dad again and ask Joyce for help? All of that was just beautifully done.

9. A thing I'm proud of creating for the Fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: All of my works on Ao3, but probably my favorite (at the moment) is my fic So Give Him Inches and Feed Him Well or my six fic series Cool To Hate.

10. A character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Max, Lucas, Dustin and Will. They're all so sweet and funny and I love them.

11. The character I relate to the most and why: normally I would say Billy, but lately it's been more Max. She's stuck in a house with a jerk of an older brother who goes off like a volcano over the littlest things, though most of the time he's dormant unless he wants to annoy her, and she has to witness him and the only father figure she has fighting all the time. Getting into screaming matches, sometimes getting physical, and while in my situation it's more the son causing problems for the father, it's still bad. The only reprieve I get is when I'm out with my friends, and even though I still care about both of them, I'm starting to lose that love for one of them (in her case Neil, in my case my brother) because of how they treat everyone else and acts like everything is normal afterwards.

12. The character I hate the most and why: Karen Fucking Wheeler. How she can go from being a concerned, doting mother in season one to pretty much a sexual predator in the span of a few seasons, I'll never know. I could understand if she cheated on Ted and went after someone her own age, but the fact that she went after a boy no older than her daughter just makes me sick. And yes, Billy flirted with her, too, but come on. He's a misguided 17-18 year old abused kid looking for any kind of affection wherever he can get it. And Karen is the adult. She should fucking know better.

13. Something I've learned from the fandom: How to politely disagree with people and kill them with kindness. That's why I have an anti's ask pinned to the top of my blog, because I want people to know that I don't care who or what they like, so I'll respect them, but if they come onto my blog actively trying to start shit, I will not fucking stand for it :)

14. Three tags I seek out on Ao3: hurt/comfort, Fluff and Angst, and enemies to lovers.

15. A song I strongly associate with my otp/favorite characters: I made a whole playlist dedicated to Billy, so.... but if I had to pick -

For harringrove: In The Woods Somewhere by Hozier or Don't You Dare (Make Me Fall In Love With You) by Kaden MacKay

For Billy: Far Too Young To Die by Panic! At The Disco, Beautiful Girls by Van Halen, Bella by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and Cherry Pie by Warrant. Also pretty much Guns N Roses' entire discography.

So, everyone I usually tag for these has already done it (I think), but on the off chance you didn't, I'll tag @thissortofsorcery and @half-oz-eddie , as well as anyone else who wants to participate!

[aeoki]

High and Low: At World’s End - Chapter 7

Location: Australian Town Characters: Tomoya. Hinata. Mitsuru & NEGI

Season: Autumn Writer: Akira

TL Note:

The Japanese language has a system of honorific speech to show respect to elders or people you are not familiar with. It's generally considered rude to not use honorific speech when speaking to the aforementioned people. (Hence, NEGI's reaction to Tomoya.)

Hammering down the nail that sticks out - This is a Japanese proverb used to describe conformity meaning those who are different will be forcefully coerced to conform with the community.

< The next morning, near a cheap hotel in the most northern part of Australia. >

NEGI: “I’ve got more or less a gist of the situation.”

“In other words, we’ve got to cross the entire country somehow, right?”

Mitsuru: Yeah! We’ve gotta go zoooom from the top to the bottom! And in the end, all we gotta do is get to the town in the south where Hajime-chan is~!

NEGI: “Easier said than done, you know… That’s gonna be incredibly difficult. Do you know just how big Australia is?”

Tomoya: Yeah… I really think this is a ridiculous plan.

But even if we gave up halfway, we don’t even know if there will be people to come save us.

It seems this project has a lot of stuff hidden from us, so in the worse case, they might just leave us to die in the wild if we whine and make a fuss.

That’s why we have to somehow reach “ES II”, where Hajime is supposed to be, on our own.

All while filming the TV show – “High and Low” – perfectly, so that they can’t complain about us afterwards.

NEGI: “You should be using honorifics[1] with me.”

Tomoya: Huh…?

NEGI: “Just so you know, I am older than you.”

Tomoya: Oh, I see. Sorry. But Kurone told me I didn’t have to use it.

NEGI: “Hmm. Well, that’s okay then. Japanese customs like honorific speech is a bit annoying and I bet I’m simply ‘Hitsugi Kurone’ in all of your eyes, anyway.”

“You can treat me like how you’d treat my little brother.”

Tomoya: I see. That’ll be great then. But, umm, NEGI…-senpai? You are a girl so I don’t think it’s right for us to treat you the same way we would treat Kurone.

NEGI: “You don’t have to worry about that. I’m used to it already. If anything, it’ll just be annoying if you go out of your way to do stuff for me.”

“Anyway, I’ll be your driver, just as Anzu asked me to. I’d like it if you can essentially ignore my existence.”

“When I’m fronting the entire time, it affects my brother’s mental state badly… It can’t be helped, though. Doesn’t look like there’s anyone else who can drive.”

Mitsuru: Ahaha! Anzu Nee-chan regrets not getting her driver’s licence because of the pickle we’re in right now!

NEGI: “There’s no use crying over split milk. It might be better for you guys to get your licence when you’re of age.” 

“It’ll open a lot of new work doors for you. And it seems the easiest ID to use in Japan is a driver’s licence. A bit weird if you ask me.”

“It thinks it’s racially homogeneous and no one has to prove anything to be friends and get along with each other.”

“There weren’t any issues when everyone assumed they’re all the same people and work that way.”

“I think it’s about time it realises reality isn’t like that.”

Mitsuru: Uhh? Are we being yelled at? Sorry!

NEGI: “...There’s no point in saying this to you guys.”

“Actually, if possible, I’d like kids like you guys to open their eyes, though. Try to get away from the adult’s brainwashing.”

“Well, whatever. I’ve talked too much and now I’m tired… I’ll go hire a random car from the rental shop, so wait here.”

Mitsuru: Okay! Thanks, Hitsugi-chan! Pick a cool one, okay?

NEGI: “I’m not Hitsugi and sorry to break it to you, but I’m going to pick one based on its price. We’ve gotta save as much money as we can, right?”

“I’m off so see you later. Be good boys, okay?”

Tomoya: Ah, okay! Thank you! Be careful, NEGI-senpai!

Mitsuru: …Negi? What’s that? A nickname?

Tomoya: You’re really something, Mitsuru. There was something clearly weird about Kurone’s speech and behaviour but you just talked to them like normal.

I didn’t really hesitate because I knew that they were a bit “weird” from the Sports Festival.

But it was your first time talking to the older sister – NEGI-senpai, right?

Mitsuru: Sister? Uh, Hitsugi-chan’s Hitsugi-chan, y’know~?

They were a bit mature and talked like a girl, though? I thought maybe that’s what they were in the mood for! It’s morning so maybe they were sleepy!

Besides, it looks like I’m the only one who’s brought their determined selves along.

I’m always 100% Mitsuru Tenma. But everyone else tends to change depending on their mood for the day. Even you, Tomoya-chan, y’know?

I’m me every day but since everyone changes the way they talk and act depending on the day, I’m used to it.

Tomoya: Hmm, so that’s how you see the world, huh… True, no matter what happens, it always feels like you’re the same person, Mitsuru.

Mitsuru: Things were different when I was filming the drama though. I have to get into character so once I finish filming, I almost forget who I am, y’know!

Tomoya: I know what you mean~ I sometimes get like that when I’m up on stage too.

I’ve trained for over a year at the Drama Club to engrave that kind of essence into my mind and body, but you’ve soaked it up like it was no big deal from the very start, huh… I’m a bit annoyed at that.

Mitsuru: ? ? I’m sorry for that?

Tomoya: It’s fine. You shouldn’t have to put yourself down just because you’ve got the skills for it. It’s awful to hammer down the nail that sticks out[2] .

Mitsuru: The stuff you say sometimes is pretty hard to understand, y’know~ …Hm?

Hinata: Hey, guys~ What a lovely morning, huh ♪ 

Tomoya: Morning, Hinata. We already said hi to each other just a while ago, though.

Mitsuru: Sorry for asking you to wake up Hime-chan and the others, Hinata-chan!

Hinata: It’s fine, it’s not something that I don’t like to do, anyway. Anzu-san helped too.

Well, we couldn’t have a girl charge into a boy’s room, so actually, I was the one who woke everyone up.

You probably asked me to do it with Anzu-san since things are pretty awkward between us right now.

Things have been really awkward ever since “Repayment Fest” last year… I’d prefer it if you didn’t do stuff like this.

There’s no law in the world that says I have to get along with everyone, right?

Tomoya: There’s no such law but I’d like you guys to get along while we’re on the school trip. It’ll be really bad if everyone else starts feeling awkward too.

It’ll be a hellish trip with the worst memories.

Hinata: It’s already pretty bad though… We’ve practically been chucked out to Australia with nothing but ourselves.

Well, it’s not the first time that’s happened to me, so I’m not super panicked or anything. This is nothing compared to when I left home when I was younger.

But Hime-kun grew up pampered so he might be really stressed about it all. We should be nice to him.

I’ll do my best to be careful and keep an eye out for him too.

Tomoya: Thanks. With these members, you and I are about the only people with common sense, after all. We’ve got to keep things together.

Hinata: Ahaha. Calling me “someone with common sense” is actually an insult to me since I’m trying to sell our unit as an eccentric pair of twins, you know~♪

And Tetora-kun’s gotten better than before.

Tomoya: It looks like he’s having a tough time in “RYUUSEITAI”, huh. Maybe he grew up a bit after experiencing the hardships of life.

But he stands out quite a bit seeing as he broke the school rules by holding the “Dragon King Competition” and causing small fires here and there.

He’s basically a problem child in my books.

Hinata: Ahaha. It’s hard to see someone differently once you’ve labelled them as a “bad person”, huh.

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[antianakin]

That was kind-of my assumption at the end of Rebels. It's been a minute since I've seen the finale, so my memory of specific quotes and thing said between Ezra and Sabine about it are escaping me, but I feel like that was how I understood it. That Sabine was choosing to look after Lothal in Ezra's absence and that was kind-of the parallel with giving her the lightsaber, as well. Isn't there something like a "look after/take care of this for me" kind of quote? I could be making that up wholesale, but it just popped into my head. I need to go rewatch the finale, I guess.

I'm a TAD annoyed at murdering her whole family off during the Purge if only because her family being okay seems like one of the main things that would keep her from going BACK to Mandalore. Like she decided to leave Mandalore because her family was back together and she'd given the Darksaber/leadership to someone she trusted. Mandalore being destroyed, the Darksaber lost to Moff Gideon, Bo-Katan's failure, AND her family being killed off seems like it would've actually forced Sabine to go BACK to Mandalore to try to help her own people more than it would've caused her to just mope around on Lothal. So I don't think that having her entire family killed off makes sense as a motivation for the characterization they gave her, not that her characterization makes sense anyway lol.

But I also just don't care for them being like "ah yes we are going to 180 Sabine's character and explain it away with a trauma you never even get to see" as opposed to just using the trauma she's already GOT. I don't mind exploring her feelings on losing MANDALORE, perhaps, and how it impacts her oath to help take care of Lothal and how torn it makes her feel between her promises to her two families. But I PREFER getting to actually see the trauma happen. In the Kenobi show, we don't need to see it because we all watched an entire film trilogy that explained what his trauma is. Ahsoka's trauma played out over TCW and Rebels. But Sabine losing her whole family happens OFF SCREEN. Her relationship with Ahsoka and how it both began and ended happened OFF SCREEN.

And this would work better if we didn't already KNOW these characters from others things. There's plenty of stories where they imply a tragedy that happened before the story started and then reveal more about it as you go along. But this isn't that kind of story. We've spent 4 seasons with Sabine and several arcs with her family. We spent 7 season of TCW and 1 season of Rebels and some random episodes in the Mandoverse with Ahsoka. We KNOW these characters already, so it's jarring to throw in random relationships and traumas that happen off-screen rather than using the content that already exists for them to build off of.

I don’t know if you’re actually watching the Ahsoka series or not, but I was very curious on your thoughts on the newest episode, and the confrontation between Anakin and Ahsoka.

Bro traumatized her again. Lol. 😒🙃

I’m actually kind of satisfied that she showed a little resentment, but I still don’t like that she didn’t cuss him out or something.

Anakin not apologizing is infuriating at first glance, but I also think it fits his character.

It’s funny, if I think about it in a certain way: I wonder if Anakin himself views his “redemption” kind of the same way his fans do. He’s just like, “Why are you still pissed at me? I died stopping the Emperor, didn’t I?” 🙄

The only one I think he’d actually feel sad about is Leia, because of course he’d want his daughter to like him, but she never will now, because he fucking tortured her and blew up her planet.

You know… I don’t really view Anakin’s final moments as a true “redemption” in the eyes of the galaxy. George Lucas has a quote where he says parents are redeemed in the eyes of their children. I guess you could argue that Anakin redeemed himself in Luke’s eyes, but not the galaxy’s own.

And then there’s Leia, who will never forgive him or think of him as her father.

In a way, it’s almost fitting for Anakin, that each of his children represent something for him.

Luke represents forgiveness, and how it’s never too late to do the right thing.

Leia represents his mistakes and sins. As long as she lives, he’ll always look at her and remember the damage he’s done. She’d never let him forget it.

Which is funny, when going back to the recent Ahsoka episode, and how he was acting like a dick to Ahsoka.

Personally, I think he was purposely trying to piss her off to make her fight to not die.

Still though: he’s such a jackass. 😒

Anyways, I guess my main point is that I don’t view Anakin being a Force Ghost shows that he was “redeemed.” I view it more as a type of salvation. Like the Bible story where Jesus is on the cross with two other men next to him. And then one man decides to “believe in him” or whatever, and his soul is saved by the skin of his teeth.

This is kind of how I view Anakin’s act of saving Luke. His soul was saved, because he did a heel face turn at the last second. So The Force was like, “Good enough, I guess.” *Throws up hands*

Anyways, sorry for the long rambling. I hope you don’t mind the message. Haha. 😅 I just have found your blog really therapeutic, because while I like Anakin as the fascinating character that he is, it still just kills me how fandom woobifies him and blames the Jedi for their own genocide.

I don't mind this message at all, thanks so much for sending so many of your thoughts, this was great! It's going to be a long reply back, though, since there's so much to respond to and if you've been going through my blog, this probably won't surprise you.

I AM watching the Ahsoka show, I'm just putting my thoughts about it on a different blog to this one (this blog was created for me to be negative so I usually only review things on here if I KNOW I'm going to be negative about it, but I was hopeful I'd have positive things to say about the Ahsoka show lol).

I think I'm feeling RELATIVELY mediocre about the show. Like I don't hate the whole thing, I can see why it appeals to people, but it's not really hitting at what I would've wanted from a narrative perspective. It seems to be relying on fan service and pretty visuals rather than genuinely good writing to get them through. If you happen to be the fan being serviced, you probably like it fine. But if you are someone more like me, then you might be noticing that there aren't a lot of stakes, the character motivations are weak or missing, the two storylines aren't being spliced together very well, and the dialogue's just not that great. There's also several more nitpicky things that are really pissing me off about the show (the way they're treating Force sensitivity, Sabine being a Jedi at all for no good reason and how her character is being butchered, the very distant and aloof acting I feel like we're getting from everybody, and of course the requisite anti-Jedi bullshit that we can all expect from Filoni at this point).

But as for how I felt about Anakin and Ahsoka's scenes in the latest episode this week, I am personally of the opinion that it WASN'T Anakin at all. I know it's left ambiguous, so if people feel like it was truly Anakin in some way shape or form, that's fine, but I think it makes more sense to me personally that it wasn't. This is Ahsoka's manifestation of Anakin in a moment where she's literally drowning and emotionally at something of a low point and has to decide if she's going to live or not and that conflict plays out in her head the way we see it. I'm also open to the idea that this is one of those things where the Force "tests" the Jedi not unlike what we see happen on Ilum and Mortis and the Force is just utilizing Anakin's visage to bring Ahsoka's deepest fears out into the open.

What makes it interesting to me is that then we can look at the interactions as THIS IS HOW AHSOKA SEES HIM. Whether she thinks about it that deeply or not, THIS personality is how she remembers him. The immediate choice to be violent with her and test her fighting skills rather than talk to her more gently, the dismissive attitude he has towards her, the flickering back and forth between Anakin and Vader because she doesn't truly know which one he was most. He wasn't necessarily a great teacher and his way of teaching wasn't very Jedi-like, it's ruthless and merciless and unkind, and we see that reflected in their interactions in this episode, which could be a really interesting look at how Ahsoka still remembers him even if she didn't see it negatively at the time.

So him not apologizing isn't like... an indication of how Anakin might actually handle this interaction if it were truly him so much as just... Ahsoka being unsure sure if he WOULD apologize because she has no idea how much of him was Vader the entire time and Vader would clearly never apologize. I think the Anakin we see by the end of ROTJ probably would apologize at SOME point, especially if we're supposed to see him as redeemed and acknowledging/accepting of his sins, etc. But Ahsoka doesn't know that. Ahsoka probably kind-of knows through Luke that he turned back in his last moments, but she wasn't there for that, she didn't get to see it, and she obviously still has no idea what caused him to turn on the Jedi and become a Sith to begin with. Why did he come back for Luke and not her? Was it because she abandoned him? Did he just not care about her the way she thought? Was there something intrinsically wrong with her that he recognized from the beginning?

There's just too much uncertainty perhaps for Ahsoka to know if he'd actually apologize and she doesn't even necessarily need or want an apology so much as she just wants to UNDERSTAND. Because of course it leads into her doubts about HERSELF and whether being his apprentice (even for as short of a time as it was) has somehow influenced her to be more like him and if she should be worried that she'll go dark or cause a student of hers to go dark. If she doesn't know why HE made that choice, how can she trust herself? It's not entirely dissimilar to the statement she made at the end of the Wrong Jedi arc where she claims she's leaving the Jedi because if the Council couldn't trust her then she isn't sure she can trust herself, either. And now with Anakin going dark, she has to wonder if the Council saw something of that in her when no one else did, saw a future for her that she hadn't been able to see for herself yet.

I think personally I'd just rather look at this episode as the closest we're going to get to a "deep dive" into Ahsoka's psyche and character rather than try to analyze it as like "what does this say about Anakin." It's not Anakin's story anymore, it's Ahsoka's. Or it's supposed to be, anyway.

That all being said, I don't think it went far enough and I do dislike that we didn't get to dive into OTHER aspects of Ahsoka via other relationships in order to round out who she actually is. I don't think we know any more about her at the end of the episode than we did at the beginning. I don't think she really grows or changes through the episode at all. I don't know what the whole "choose to live" thing was about or how it connects to her overall arc because while, yes, she's obviously literally drowning in the moment, "choosing to live" is not something they've been exploring as an issue for Ahsoka throughout this season so far, so it didn't feel like this cool end to her character journey so much as just a really shallow one-liner made to sound badass without anything particularly profound behind it.

I think gffa said that one of the things you can tell about this show is that it's been percolating in Filoni's mind for so long that there's things he's leaving out because they're just totally obvious to him now and he's forgotten that the audience won't know some of it without being told or shown. If Ahsoka was depressed or suicidal or something like that, it never came across in the first four episodes. She barely seems to be struggling at all to me, personally. So maybe that's what Filoni wanted us to understand about her, maybe that was the intention, but it just didn't quite make it from his head into the writing or onto the screen.

And I keep going back to the Obi-Wan Kenobi show and the way they handled his character arc. They started him at a really low point where he's so CLEARLY depressed and just moving through life without actually living or finding any way to be happy. They spend so much time showing us how OUT of character Obi-Wan is in order for the pay off by the end and the slow growth of his character throughout the six episode story to feel satisfying. And while he's out of character in his depression, it's done in such a way that that's the POINT. We all know WHY he's out of character, we know what's causing him to be that way, it doesn't need to be explained because it didn't happen off-screen, it's literally the plot of an entire trilogy of films. It felt like a pretty natural extension of the state we last saw him in and it allows him the ability to actually have a journey that makes sense.

We've gotten NONE OF THAT for Ahsoka. Her relationship with Sabine is nonsensical and comes out of nowhere with zero explanation. Her weird thing about Padawans comes out of nowhere with zero explanation. Her aloof attitude is coming out of nowhere and does nothing to help us understand the state of mind she's in. She never seems to be acting SO out of character that it tells the audience how much she's struggling, but she's also SO flat that she no longer feels much like the Ahsoka everyone knew and loved from The Clone Wars. They're inventing new problems for her to have that make no sense instead of giving her a journey to actually deal with the problems she already had and hadn't gotten any resolution for. And they're unable to actually connect her problems from before into the Rebels storyline in a way that makes any real sense or feels genuine and meaningful for either Ahsoka or Sabine, so both storylines are getting half-assed and butchered in the attempt.

Personally, I think Ahsoka should've had a season set closer to ROTJ or even before it, just after she gets off of Malachor and 2-3 years prior to ANH, to explore her immediate reaction to Anakin's betrayal and have her overcome that on her own. Use original characters primarily, throw in Bail Organa or something if needed just to give her a quick plot, but let it be about AHSOKA. And only once her journey to finding herself is complete do we then move on to the Search for Ezra, which should be focusing WAY more on the Rebels characters than we're actually getting and should not involve any of the Rebels characters (except maybe Jacen) learning to be Jedi. Ahsoka would be a side character in this story because she has now had her story told and we can let Sabine and Ezra and Jacen and Hera be at the forefront of the story. (I also think we could've done something with Sabine that wasn't being a Jedi or her entire family being murdered off screen so she has an excuse to do a characterization 180 and act like a bratty teenager all over again.)

If I had to just change THIS episode a little, I have a few alternatives I've been thinking about. For one, I do just think we should've gotten to explore OTHER relationships beyond Anakin to emphasize the other things that Ahsoka is that aren't just "Anakin's Padawan." Rex, Barriss, Plo Koon, even Kanan or Ezra to try to make that connection to Rebels. She's been a friend, a commander, a rebel, a student, a mentor, an ally, a Jedi. She's been so many things that have nothing at all to do with Anakin and I think that might've been nice to explore as well. Yes, Anakin was important. Yes, she's fucked up about it. But that's not ALL THAT SHE IS. So I think starting off with her fears about Anakin is great, but then have her move on and sort-of go through it a little like Charles Dickens' A Christmas Story to show that she's more than this, too. This probably would've worked better if it had been a two parter thing rather than one 30-40 minute episode, depending on how many characters you wanted to throw in.

I also would've appreciated seeing her break and shatter at seeing Anakin. I wanted her to be ANGRY, to refuse to forgive him, to throw his betrayal in face. And then by the end of the episode, she lets it go. She's seen that she doesn't need to hold onto that anymore and it doesn't matter what choices Anakin did or didn't make, she's her own person and can make HER own choices. And so Anakin comes back at the end, and she's no longer angry. She can forgive him. I also would've wanted her to have been more snappy and frustrated and angry earlier in the season, as well, so we can TELL there's something simmering underneath that she's trying to keep repressed until it finally boils over in this episode.

The other alternative I came up with was the OPPOSITE idea where Ahsoka is basically just kind-of... in denial about it. She isn't acknowledging her own anger and pain and betrayal at all and she just wants to spend this time with Anakin the way they used to and Anakin is sitting there provoking her and trying to get her to break so she can let it all out. Eventually he gets her to admit it and get angry and yell at him and acknowledge her own pain finally so she can see how it's impacting her relationships in the present day. She's been trying up until now, but as Yoda's always said, sometimes trying isn't enough, and you just have to do or do not. She doesn't reject him at the end of this, but she can at least acknowledge what he did to her and how it's made her feel. You could even include some of her anti-Jedi bullshit in this and have her justifying Anakin's betrayal by saying the Jedi failed him the way they failed her and Anakin pushing back on that idea so that by the end of the episode, she can recognize that she's been blaming the Jedi because she's been uncomfortable with her inability to understand Anakin's choices and it was easier to blame the Jedi than live with that uncertainty.

I've discussed my feelings on Anakin's redemption a lot and they're definitely not in the majority. Personally, I just don't think he's redeemed at all. My definition of redemption is along the lines of "you can fix/undo the thing you broke/damaged" rather than just... "you decided to stop breaking things even if there's no way to fix it." It doesn't mean Anakin can't keep being a better person if he'd lived, or that he can't find redemption in more specific places (like Luke forgiving him for chopping off his hand), but that there is no redemption for what he did to the Jedi, to the clones, and to the galaxy at large. None. It doesn't matter what he does, it doesn't matter that he stopped himself and Palpatine, it doesn't MATTER. The Jedi and the Republic are still gone, the clones were still enslaved, the galaxy is still in shambles and traumatized from 25 years under the Empire.

You aren't the only one who's chosen to separate your definition of "redemption" from something else to make it make more sense. Someone else went for redemption being different from an absolution wherein you are just immediately forgiven of all of your sins because of one act or whatever, while redemption is the process of doing better. If that works for you, go for it. Personally, I just think Anakin isn't redeemed. He cheat coded his way into being a Ghost and the Ghosts don't make any sense anyway. I think it's definitely intended to represent his redemption IN THE NARRATIVE, like that's the point of the visual, but it just doesn't work for me, so I choose not to see it that way. It's ambiguous enough and the Force Ghost lore confusing enough that it's not that hard.

Your interpretation of Luke and Leia as the two sides of forgiveness is intriguing. I do think Leia could get to the point of forgiveness that basically looks like letting go of her anger because the man's dead anyway so there's no real point staying angry and understanding the history that may have led him to become the monster she knew, but that doesn't mean she has to LIKE him or ever consider him a father.

I think you could kind-of throw Ahsoka and Obi-Wan in there as different reactions to Anakin, too. With Ahsoka as someone who sort-of clings to who Anakin used to be and can't truly reconcile the two versions of him that she knew, and Obi-Wan as someone who rises above. Unlike Leia, he did know and love Anakin, but he is also able to let go of his anger and betrayal and accept Anakin for what he is now rather than pining for someone who no longer exists. And Ahsoka is the opposite of Luke as someone who also knew Anakin and loved him, but struggles a lot MORE with the revelation of who he was and his impact on her life. Everyone approaches Anakin and his relationship to them and his choices in a different way.

I wish the Ahsoka show wanted to explore any of that at all lol.

[coffeecat22]

While Farah was always my favorite character by far, I was also very interested in the golden trio, Rosalind and Andreas as well. Their past, their personalities, the relationships between all of them (and between Sky and his 2 dads) were fascinating to me.

Season 2 didn't really deliver on those fronts; I never let myself forget that the adults were not the focus of the show but I'd say they still had a fair amount of screentime in s1, and what we got of them was very good. S2 was focused on the teens a lot more than s1 imo and it's a pity because the older characters had a lot of potential. Maybe they didn't have enough time to explore them while trying to tell the story, after all 7 episodes isn't much, but I'm still sad about it.

Random thoughts and takeaways after just finishing the season:

Ben: I expected him to do Rosalind's bidding for the sake of his kids but something about the way he alerted her of Saul being at the school felt weird to me. IIRC Roz didn't know that Saul was there at all, could he have gotten in and out without her knowing if it wasn't for Ben? Did Ben help Saul get inside the school just to turn him over to Roz? It felt more like a betrayal than a situation where Ben had no choice but it also seemed like Saul understood 🤷🏻‍♀️ and then Ben left, even though it meant leaving Terra behind with a headmistress he'd been trying to protect her from.

Andreas: he was as much of an asshole as I thought he'd be lol. Dissapointed we didn't see a confrontation between him and Saul. I saw people theorizing Sky would kill his dad in s2, maybe in a fit of rage, maybe to protect Silva, maybe because mind control was involved... they were right for the most part 😂 I didn't feel like much happened between Andreas and Sky before they killed Andreas off. Sky said a couple of times that he was getting somewhere with his dad but all I saw was a proud look ONCE and that was it. Andreas definitely cared for Beatrix, but he seemed to have no interest in Sky. I think he knew the people of Aster Dell were BW but maybe he thought it wouldn't make a difference if he told Saul because he'd still try to stop Roz. Was Bea really from AD? Or did Andreas lie to her about it?

Rosalind: so she was a total zealot trying to start a war with the BW by stealing the Dragon Flame and destroying AD. I liked this Rosalind more than s1 Roz, idk if it was the writing or the actress but it worked better for me. The scene in front of Andreas' grave was interesting and at first I thought she really cared for him but by the end of the scene I had the impression she cared in the way she would for a possesion, something that was of use to her. And was obviously sorry when she lost it before she was done with it, which is how she feels about Bloom. It was a shock to see her die so soon, but I loved that Luna used her death to justify going to war and getting people to agree with it. There's probably more to say about her but after 7 hours of staring at a screen, is all I can remember now

Saul: funnily enough this is how the show disappointed me the most I think? He just didn't feel like an actual character to me. He's the only one of the adults who is still alive and around at the end but he feels almost 2dimensional. He wasn't allowed to react to anything or it felt a bit superficial. I was laughing by the end of the season: 1) no resolution with Andreas, 2) loved the conflict with Sky but it was kind of forgotten after Andreas' death (it would've been nice to see the immediate aftermath of that for Saul and Sky) and the one scene where they discuss it Saul says some things that sounded weird, but I can't explain why, 3) Saul and Farah seemed close in s1 and yet if you told me that s2 Saul didn't know her I'd have believed it. It was hilarious to see that Saul never asked about her, probably thought she was actually on the run, didn't seem slightly concerned that Sebastian might be telling the truth about her death, etc. I love silrah no matter the nature of their relationship so maybe I'm biased? it seems Bloom told him she saw Farah again, yet it didn't seem to affect him at all. He seems unaffected after losing both Andreas and Farah. I guess it was weird to see him like that all season, almost like he was going through the motions.

Farah: I was fully prepared for anything the writers decided to do with her, so I'm not surprised. I thought I might feel sad but it actually felt like a hole opened up in my chest and sucked in all emotions. So I guess it's a good thing in a way but it also feels empty. The way she died just leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, it was really stupid. While I agree that the rules of life and death can't be broken at all or at least not without consequences, this show is not known for making sensible choices in terms of storytelling, but they had to pick this hill to die on 🙄 I'd have happily waited until s3 to bring her back if it meant she could stay but whatever. There's also the possibility that Eve couldn't or didn't want to come back.

I'm kind of mad that they gave us these characters and then took them away like this but I've always enjoyed fanfic and fan theories more than the show itself anyway. This is what I get for getting attached to the adult (side) characters on a show about teenagers 🤦🏻‍♀️

[itgirlification]

supermodel | jjk

the last three months have been hell for you, but Jungkook seemed to be living his best life.

pairing: ex-bf!jk x thick!reader

warnings: explicit mentions of body image and insecurities, infidelity, anal sex, oral (male receive), foul language (kinda), etc.

now playing: supermodel by sza

part two part three

Exactly three months ago, your and Jungkook’s 2 years relationship officially ended. Unofficially, it ended about 5 months ago. And for about one month now, Jungkook’s been seeing someone else.

Your heart and mind told you not to do it but you couldn’t help calculating. Three months ago, you were still dating, two months later, he started dating someone else. That must mean he’s known her for a while. Did he cheat on you with her? Well, it’s not like it matters now anyway, does it?

Her name was Yuki, an undeniable Japanese beauty. You were still in college, studying music and she was a famous model who appeared in internationally known magazines. You assumed she met Jungkook during a photoshoot since he was a professional photographer who often worked for companies like Vogue and Playboy. You couldn’t help but compare yourself to her.

It wasn’t the fact that he moved on so quickly that hurt you the most. It was the fact that he knew all about your low self-esteem and how you lack confidence. Especially about your body. And he still went and dated a model, of all professions in the world. He was definitely over you.

If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he did it on purpose. But thankfully, you knew better, he looked too happy for that to be even considered. He forgot about you.

You’re making yourself sadder by remembering all the times he assured you you were beautiful and your body was nothing to be ashamed of. The times he let his fingertips run over the lines of your stretch marks, whispering in your ear how much he loved them and how they reminded him of Tiger stripes. The times he caressed your jiggly thighs and told you how sexy he thought they were.

Then your mind would drift back to the phone in your hand, the Instagram page of Yuki Sakurai opened, careful not to accidentally like anything and expose yourself. Not that she’d notice anyway, she had 3.7 million followers, while you had a private one with 500 followers and no posts, and she gets around 300 to 700 thousand likes on each post, depending on whether she posts random photos or pretty pictures of herself. Or newly, your ex-boyfriend, Jungkook. Oh, how crazy everybody goes whenever she posts him. People love them together. You couldn’t blame them. Two attractive people? Of course, they’re gonna look great together.

Fucking great.

That the end of your relationship with Jungkook would look like this was semi-predictable from the beginning. He did admit to you that he never thought he’d date someone that looked like you when you first dated. And your heart broke a little. But he also made up for it in those two years, it was a beautiful relationship nonetheless.

While you weren’t exactly his ‘ideal’ type, he was definitely yours. You always heard from other women ‘when in a relationship, the man always has to love the woman more than she loves him. Otherwise, it won’t work.’ You never really got the saying until your breakup with Jungkook happened. It was the fact that you clearly loved Jungkook more than he loved you that lead to this.

“Oh my goodness!”, your roommate, Jane, dramatically exclaimed. “Will you stop feeling bad for yourself and do something? That’s not what hot girls do, sis.”

Jane was a lovely girl with a not so lovely temper. She always means well and you got along perfectly as soon as you met. Which was around 3 and a half years ago.

She looked over your shoulder to see what you were looking at. You obviously didn’t want her to see you snooping around your ex-boyfriend’s current girlfriend’s Instagram but it was too late.

“Seriously, yn?”, she took your phone in her hand and threw it on the bed. “Let’s go somewhere, you can’t do this to yourself anymore. I’m not letting you.”

Jane was clearly worried about you at this point. The only thing you did these last few weeks was eating, shower, cry, sleep and miss a whole bunch of classes. This wasn’t good at all.

“Where?”, your question was short.

“To the mall? Or the nail studio? Anything that’ll get you out of this fucking dormitory.”, Jane sighed, pulling the blanket off of you, making you whine a little. “C’mon, go put on some cute outfit and we’ll go.”

You felt bad since she was trying hard to make you feel better. But it didn’t really work.

You nodded, standing up from the bed, nonetheless. You picked out a cute two-piece dress, that brought back blurred memories of the time you went on a date with Jungkook, wearing the same two-piece. Bet Yuki would look cuter in this...

‘Shut your petty ass up, yn. It’s embarrassing, the way you’re stuck on a taken guy who wants nothing to do with you’

You wish you could change the way you think, even if it’s just for an hour or two. You wish you would stop imagining Jungkook judging you when he saw you naked or when you told him that you wished you could cut off some of your fat with a pair of scissors.

You were beyond ashamed of yourself. Why wasn’t it easy for you to just stay by yourself? why were you so desperately in need of Jungkook by your side to the point where you’d lock yourself in your room for a month just because he isn’t there?

You needed Jungkook. You became so attached to him in those two years, because you always saw him as a permanent, a forever. Not just a temporary, not just a distant memory. You already saw him as the father of your children, as the man you’re gonna marry.

You were so blinded by the fact that you had him, that you forgot you could lose him anytime.

“I’m done, let’s go.”, unenthusiastically, you announced to Jane, who was already waiting for you.

“Let’s get the fuck outta here!”, In contrast to your spirit, hers seemed to be all roses and daisies. “Lord knows you need it...”

__________

“Look at this cute ass skirt, girl”, Jane pointed at a chic, wine mini skirt she was holding. “You know, when I saw it back there I wanted to have it, but it’d look so much better on you”

You took a few seconds to admire Jane’s beauty. She was about 3 cm taller than you, had a great posture, and almond, dark brown eyes that suited her dark skin tone perfectly. Her body leaned more towards the slimmer side.

“Shut up! No, it would not”, you let out a small giggle. “It would look gorgeous on you, buy it.”

She smiled a little at your laughs. She was happy to see you at least a little cheerful again. “Yeah, but I think it’d look better on you. I’m entitled to my own opinion, am I not?”

You knew this debate was gonna go back and forth, because of her stubbornness. “Let’s both buy the skirt.”

You ended up doing so, added by a bunch of bags full of clothing. This may’ve turned into your new coping mechanism. Who needed therapy when you can go on a shopping spree?

Two hours were spent in boutiques and clothing stores and Jane decided she was tired, wanting to visit the local spa.

“No, seriously, these Riverdale seasons just keep on getting worse and worse. Netflix needs to step up their game ASAP”, Jane ranted, making you laugh at how serious she takes it. “It’s getting embarrassing. I’m being for real.”

The two of you were sitting in the whirlpool at the spa, relaxing your whole bodies a little.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, I don’t watch these new Netflix shows anyways. Been stuck on the vampire diaries for the last 7 years”, you chuckled, knowing you hated trying new things. “Can you pass me one of those magazines?”

Jane nodded, grabbing a random one from the table next to her and handed it to you, without looking at it.

The cover of it caught your eyes immediately. How could it not, when your ex’s new girl looks absolutely dazzling on the front page of it.

‘Supermodel Yuki Sakurai talks summer fashion tips, struggle with self-love and most importantly, her hot, new boyfriend the media is going crazy over’ was the headline of the Harper’s Bazaar Magazine cover.

You felt your stomach getting sick and your breath getting heavier, but you still flipped the pages until you found the one with her interview. You began reading it, skipping the boring parts.

‘Int: so, we see you have a new boyfriend. Tell us, how did you guys meet?

Yuki: Yeah, he’s an amazing guy. We actually met about six or five months ago at one of my photoshoots, since he’s a photographer and we exchanged numbers and stuff, and then we made it official mid last month.’

About six or five months ago? You were with him back then, but her answer was too unclear to find out if he cheated or not.

“Woah, yn, you okay?”

You entirely forgot about the fact that you were with Jane, let alone somewhere other than your bed.

Before you could react, Jane snatched the magazine out of your hand.

“You really can’t escape them, huh?”, She sighs, taking you in her arm. “It’s gonna be okay, baby. In a few months, you’re gonna look back to this and think wow I really was stuck on a guy who’s scared of microwaves and cried like a bitch when Iron Man died.”

You laughed, punching her arm playfully. “You know, I actually love these things about him. Shows his sensitivity and the way he perceives things.”

Jane looked at you as if she didn’t believe you were actually saying that stuff. “Girl, you’re overanalyzing this. Let’s just throw this shit in the trash, okay?”

She put the magazine aside.

“I just don't know what I did wrong.”, You murmured. “I know we weren't the best, but we didn't even fight that much. We could’ve talked it through.”

Jane pursed her lips and cooed. “You know, relationships are complicated sometimes. The reason why he broke up, to begin with, is probably not your fault.”

“Well, what if it is? I mean what if I was too fat or too ugly for him?”, you asked. “If he wanted a skinny girl so bad, I could’ve lost weight for him, I don’t get it.”

Jane looked at you like you lost your mind entirely. “I can’t believe you just said that! Even if that was the reason, which it wasn’t, you shouldn’t make yourself suffer because of it. That’s his loss. You’re beyond gorgeous and you have an amazing body.”

“You’re just saying that.”, tears slowly started coming up in your eyes. “But the thing is Jungkook knows all about my insecurities. Why would he do that to me? I know he knows that I’m still not over him.”

You usually didn’t like crying in front of other people, but you didn’t really care at the moment, besides that was Jane. You trusted her with your life.

“Girl, men are trash, I can’t believe you’re crying over one right now, seriously.”, she wiped your tears and held your face between her hands. “You know, honestly, I’ve read so many articles about how models actually hate themselves and have like the lowest self-esteem so in conclusion, no matter how miserable you are, his new girl is even more miserable.”

You knew Jane didn’t mean it in a harmful way, but it sounded harsher than needed. “I don’t hate her, she probably doesn’t even know about me. I’m just really insecure. He upgraded from me. He’s dating a whole model now.”

The situation just felt like a deja vu of these last few weeks laying in your bed, even though you were at the spa with your friend. You were supposed to have fun, yet you didn’t feel like having any.

“Why would you feel insecure when all you’ve seen of her are Instagram posts and red carpet pictures? She’s supposed to look beautiful, it’s her job.”

To a certain extent, Jane was right, but that didn’t really help your situation, you still felt bad about yourself. You stayed silent.

“C’mon, this isn’t fun anymore. Let’s leave.”, Jane mumbled.

_______

it’s been two days since the incident at the spa and you felt a little bit better now.

Those days were spent reading the same three book series you’ve read your entire life, overthinking, hot Cheetos, Indian takeout, and Netflix. It really wasn’t as miserable as it sounded.

You were just taking a little rest before term break ends and you have to go back to the shithole college again.

Jane was using the time until college starts again, but in different ways than you were. She was planning on going to some frat party in an hour and forget about the world’ for a minute. Or till 4 in the morning, where she will most likely drunk call you and ask you for a ride back to the dorms, because the friends she went to the party with were shit-faced as well and were in no way capable of driving anywhere without the cops stopping them.

Going out partying on a Friday night was a Jane tradition. In the past, you’d sometimes go with her, but you mostly spent your time out with Jungkook doing something more fun than partying could ever be. Now you can’t do that anymore, but laying in bed is more ideal than a party for you at the moment.

“How do I look?”, Jane twirled around to show off her black cocktail dress. She looked beautiful.

“You look beautiful.”, you responded to her question. “Are you leaving now?”

“Hm”, she said, to which you nodded. “You sure you don’t wanna come with me? It’s gonna be really fun.”

You shook your head no.

“Alright”, she shrugged, making her way out of your bedroom. “But I told you, it’s gonna be fun.”

You chuckled, rolling your eyes. “I’ll stay here, I have shit to do.”

“Yeah, right, like binge-watching the vampire diaries and taking 5-hour naps”, she said in a sarcastic tone. “Anyway, bye-bye, Vic’s already waiting for me in the car.”

Victoria was perhaps one of the most obnoxious people you know, yet she was too much of a nice person for you to talk shit about her. The voice of your intrusive thoughts couldn’t help but to, though.

“Alright, bye, take care and say hi to Vic from me.”

After Jane left, an hour went by like it was just a couple of minutes. You were starting to get real bored and decided to watch some regular tv in hopes to find something you enjoy. You ended up not finding anything fun, but you still watched it, because you didn’t have anything else to do.

A few moments later, the doorbell rang and you were suddenly worried. Either this is a serial killer or Jane forgot something.

But to your surprise, it was neither, but it was none other than

“Jungkook?”, truly, those were the only words you were able to mutter out at your shocked state. “What are you do-“

At the speed of light, you were interrupted by your ex-boyfriend pressing his lips to yours. He didn’t say a word.

You weren’t expecting him. Not knowing how you were supposed to feel at the moment, you just let it happen. You were sure your mental state couldn’t get any worse than that, no matter how this will affect you in the end.

“Is Jane home?”, for the first time in 3 months, you’re hearing his silky voice again.

Jungkook knew Jane always had some type of special hatred for him with her killing stares and her bitter comments. You didn’t notice either though.

He also knew she must hate him even more after your breakup. Or maybe she liked him more now since she was able to get rid of him without killing anyone.

“No”, your answer was short and it made a weight fall from Jungkook’s shoulders before he continued kissing you.

It wasn’t anything you haven’t done before, yet it felt like it’s been ages since it last happened. Your mind drifted to the thought of Jungkook and his model girlfriend. You were asking yourself what their sex life was like, if she was tighter than you or if she had stretch marks and scars.

Jungkook’s lips were moving south, giving your neck wet kisses, while you were wondering why he broke up with his model girlfriend. Or if he even did. You felt selfish for not caring.

Removing your clothes one by one, you were left in your underwear, while Jungkook only had his boxers on.

This body was yours. You knew it inside out. Where he liked to get touched and where he preferred not to. You knew him better than anyone else. You were sure.

You already moved to your bedroom, since Jungkook effortlessly carried you there. You were sat on his lap, facing him and your hands were in his messy hair. His hands were around your waist, he was slightly smiling into the kiss, as you started grinding on him. He loved how easy it was for him to turn you on. You were still his.

Cutting off the kiss, he looked you in the eyes, while his hand was on your cheek. “Say aah.”, he said.

You widened your mouth obediently, which was followed by him collecting as much saliva as he could in his mouth and spitting it into your mouth.

“Swallow.”, demanding, he spit on your face, his eyes become darker with every passing moment. You did as he said.

You looked at him with big eyes. He knew you loved it. You’ve always had a thing for him degrading and humiliating you during sex.

He started grinding on you almost desperately. You knew exactly what he wanted.

Getting out of his grip, you dropped to your knees and freed his hard dick from his drawers. You reached for it and started pumping it, and licking it. Your spit was leaking down his dick as you used it for lubrication. Then you started sucking on it, just the way you used to.

Jungkook’s groans and satisfied sighs were enough to make you even wetter than before. You enjoyed giving more than receiving.

Your mouth was wet and warm around him, giving him a feeling of familiarity. You lick over the tip a few times, then proceed to fully take him into your mouth.

The bulge in your throat could be seen and the way your eyes were tearing up a little wasn’t bothering you at all. You loved giving.

Jungkook started thrusting in and out of your warm, welcoming mouth, his tip hitting the back of your throat multiple times.

“Fuck”, a throaty moan left Jungkook’s mouth, giving you hints that he was about to cum. And he did, releasing in your mouth before you swallowed it. “Shit, baby, that was so good.”

You felt your face heat up and a sheepish smile made its way to your face. Your throat was sore.

The two of you were on the bed again. To you, it felt like it was the times before your breakup again, when you’d purposely start an argument just for the makeup sex because Jungkook wasn’t giving you any anymore. It was like sex was the only thing to look forward to.

You felt attached to Jungkook to a point where it was dangerous. You weren’t okay when he wasn’t around. He affected every part of your life and God knew it wasn’t always a positive thing. Maybe it was the fact that he took your virginity. Maybe because he was your first boyfriend, the first guy that made you believe you were worthy of love and that someone was actually capable of loving you. One thing you knew was Jungkook had an expansive influence on your life.

While you were practically drowning in your own thoughts, Jungkook was busy taking off your underwear.

“You okay?”, Jungkook calmly asked you, looking at your riddled face.

“Huh? Yeah, I’m okay.”, you sounded distracted, Jungkook wasn’t sure about asking you what it is though. He didn’t feel like getting personal.

So he shrugged it off and started kissing you again, his dick was unsurprisingly hard again as he played with your tits. He drew lines over the stretch marks of your thighs and kissed them.

“Can I fuck your ass?”, Jungkook’s raspy, tired-sounding voice casually asked, to which you quickly nodded, knowing that Jungkook’s favorite position had always been anal. He was massaging and gripping your ass firmly.

“This is gonna hurt at first, but I promise it gets better.”, He warned calmly into your ear, while putting some lube on his dick and just went right into your ass, slowly thrusting so you don’t feel as much pain.

He was right, it did hurt a lot when he first put it in, but the pain just changed into pleasure in a matter of time and his slow-paced thrusts helped with the adjustment.

“Fuck, I missed this ass”, he practically growled into your ear, as he kept on thrusting in and out, steadily gripping your wide hips with his big, veiny hands. “It just doesn’t feel right when I’m inside her ass.”

You knew your confidence shouldn’t rely on Jungkook bringing his girlfriend down, but you couldn’t help but feel good about your body when he said that. It’s been a while since you felt even a tiny spark of confidence. You weren’t so fond of him mentioning her while he was inside of you.

Your soft moans rang through the whole room like sirens, while he watched your ass jiggle against his pelvis, thrusting in and out faster every second. He missed this.

You had always thought you were indecisive, but you knew exactly what you wanted. You just couldn’t have that, so you’d eventually have to settle for less.

Jungkook wasn’t to blame for it, you just couldn’t concede your shortcomings. The movie’s villain wasn’t always the real villain.

Your hands traveled to your pussy to make sure you’d orgasm as well, when you heard Jungkook’s breathing getting heavier and his thrusts getting gentler than before, indicating that he was gonna cum soon. You were certain he could make you cum with just anal, but you wanted to cum with him.

With furrowed eyebrows and drops of sweat dripping down his body, Jungkook looked down at your arched back. The whole scene was sticky, especially when Jungkook presses his upper body to your back, whispering sweet nothings into your ear and kissing the spot.

It was kinda odd, having sex with your ex-boyfriend you were crying over just a day ago. There was a certain intensity to it though. Like your long-lasting nostalgia was finally fulfilled.

You’ve realized you couldn’t imagine yourself being intimate with anybody else. Jungkook already knew your body, how it looked without the material protecting it, the strawberry skin, the slightly sagging breasts you swore you’d surgically remove once you had the chance to but didn’t. He knew where you liked being touched, he was the first one to even touch you in those places.

You were unsure what you’d do with yourself when he leaves.

Jungkook’s thrusts slowly started stopping and you too felt the familiar sensation in your stomach.

Suddenly, you two were nothing but desire, fear, and pleasure. And faster than you could process, you came together.

For minutes after your orgasm, you were just laying on the bed, thoughtless. Maybe a little regretful. Not you, but him.

You weren’t facing each other, but you could hear each other’s breathing. Your stomach was filled with something you’d describe as post-sex melancholia.

All of a sudden, Jungkook stood up from the bed, startling your resting self a little, but you decided to keep quiet, wanting to see what he was going to do.

He made his way to the door to leave what he thought was your sleeping body laying there. You couldn’t keep quiet anymore.

“Where are you going?”, your soft voice suddenly rang in his ears. “Don’t you wanna stay?”

He didn’t know how exactly to tell you. You’ve always been a gullible little girl, you were the type of girl to think fucking equals love. Little did you know that wasn’t the case at all.

“Yn.... you know I can’t”, Jungkook responded, you knew it wasn’t gonna be good when he said your name like that. “I got a girl at home and I don’t wanna mess shit up with her.”

There it was. Your suspicion was corroborated. He was still going out with the model and you were a certified home wrecker. Great.

You physically felt your heart breaking. “Bu- but why are you here then?”

You were incapable of being mad at him at the moment. It was your fault for letting him in, again. After breaking your trust and your heart.

“This was a mistake”, he declared, not looking into your eyes. “I’m sorry, yn...”

He’s moved past your room now, already at the exit of your dormitory. He was about to leave.

“You already ruined shit with her when you came here and fucked me.”, your voice was small, but your words were heard.

Without looking back, he left.

And you went back to your room, standing in the middle of it for a minute in silence before your brain fully processed what had happened and your tears started pouring.

[interlunium-opus]

"I hate him spending time with you more than I hate running so you know, priorities." [ Jay. ]

[ Jay | fluff ]

Author’s Note: Here's a fluff in response to the following request "Can you maybe do a fluff/crack for Jay where maybe he felt a little jealous when you praised someone for their skill and he immediately goes competitive mode and openly tries to show how he's far better indirectly to the guy?" Hope it's close to what you have in mind and hope you like it :3

“Do you have anything to explain to me?”

You jumped, startled, as Jay appeared beside you while you were busy shoving your textbooks into your locker, “Jay! What did I say about sneaking up on people?”

“And what did I say about not keeping secrets between us?” Jay snapped back, arms crossed, brows raised, “Is this how much our friendship is worth?”

“My goodness, what is it this time?” You sighed as he fished his phone out of his pocket, turning it to show you a candid picture of you and Sunghoon from last night.

“I mean seriously, of all people to date, you have to go for this pretentious prick?” Jay scoffed before gesticulating wildly, “Look, I know I said that you need to stop being aromantic and start planting some sort romantic interest somewhere — but Sunghoon is just ain't it. In fact ! I’d rather you date the spawn of the devil, Jungwon, instead.”

You snorted a laugh before shaking your head dismissively, “Dude, we were just running last night okay? Does that even look like a date to you?”

“Okay,” he repeated sarcastically, “but you love running alone! So why are you suddenly running with someone — and not just anyone but this prick???”

“I really don’t get why you two hate each other so much,” you raised an eyebrow at Jay, “Look we just happened to bump into each other last night and since we were heading the same way, he asked if I don’t mind him tagging along for the remainder of the way — no big deal.”

“Ughh, that’s the oldest trick in book,” Jay scrunched his face, “And you said yes?”

“I mean — we’re not exactly strangers, we have been in the same tutorial class together for more than a year now," you mumbled as you zip your bag up, "He's a good running partner too. His pace was so stable and steady that it made me stuck to mine as well — I mean, duh, he's an athlete after all."

"Hey, I can run well too," Jay grumbled defensively, "You know if you needed a running partner, you could've called me right?"

“Maybe if you were as fit as I am, she would have,” Sunghoon suddenly appeared beside Jay, peering over his shoulder to look at the picture on his phone, “That’s a good picture of me and y/n — no wonder you got jealous.”

“Speak of the devil,” Jay rolled his eyes, “Aren't you a bit too greedy over what I have? first, you took up my spot for the dance competition and now you're trying to make a move on my girl."

"Jay, that was 2 years ago — get over it. You've taken my spot afterwards for the Summer competition anyway so we're actually even," Sunghoon retorted, "Also, she's not your girlfriend anyway so your territorial behaviour is pretty misplaced."

"Guys, cut it out," you shut your locker close with extra force in an effort to shut the squabbles, "Also, why am I suddenly dragged into your petty fights."

"Right sorry about that, he's just always trying to pick a fight with me," Sunghoon shook his head dismissively before turning to you and beamed, "Just stopping by to ask if you're running again tonight 'cause I would love to join again. It’s off season for ice-skating so I thought it's the perfect time to get back to running again."

“Oh? Yeah I am going tonight as well, just a tad bit late in the evening though. I want to finish up some work at the library first,” you smiled back at Sunghoon, ignoring Jay’s burning stare, “You know you can start ahead if you want — don’t want you waiting too long in case I'll take too much time at the library.”

“I’ll go when you go, don’t worry,” he reassured as he backed away, joining Heeseung who was waiting for him, “I’ll text you alright? Looking forward to tonight!”

You nodded and waved at him before turning to Jay, “What?”

“That’s it,” Jay clasped his hands together, “I’ll run with you tonight — and the next.”

“Jay, don’t be ridiculous, you hate running,” you emphasized, “which is why I never asked you to run with me.”

“Hey — I can love running if it’s for you,” he winked, wrapping an arm over your shoulders, dragging you past the crowded hallway towards your next class, “Or let me paraphrase: I hate him spending time with you more than I hate running so you know, priorities.”

“your priorities are all skewed then," you clicked your tongue, "Well, as long as you don't hurt yourself."

_________________________________________________________________________

The next morning however Jay did not show up in Modern Political Thought seminar that you guys have every Thursday morning. Though the guy is such a sleepyhead, he never misses a class even when he pulled up an all-nighter the night before. So this sudden absence, paired with the fact that he managed to run a whole 5km without stopping last night, was sowing seeds of suspicions and guilt within you. To make things worse, he did not even respond to any of your messages for the last 5 hours.

That was why you ended up being in front of Jay's apartment instead of having your lunch that noon. "Hi!" you immediately say as the door of Jay's apartment opened. It was Jake, his flatmate, with his lids only half-opened and hair all disheveled, "y/n?"

"Sorry for waking you up Jake," you smiled apologetically, "Is Jay home? He missed a Politics seminar this morning and he didn’t respond to my text at all — just wanna make sure he’s alright.”

“mmhmm, pretty sure he’s in," he answered drowsily before yawning, "but probably, still hibernating.”

“Oh okay, do you mind if I come in?”

Jake nodded, backing up as he held the door open, “Of course, come in — it’s messy though.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you reassured, making your way towards the room at the end of the hallway. As you knocked on his door, Jake suddenly shouted from the kitchen, “don’t bother knocking y/n — that guy sleeps like a log. Just go in.”

“Uhh…” you bit your lip, slightly hesitating but relented when your subsequent knocks yielded no answer.

“Jay? I’m entering okay?” you say as you let yourself in, carefully navigating around the dark room, stumbling a few times against some random furnitures.

"Jake, get out okay-" you hear him grumble from underneath the covers, tossing the other way, "just let me... sleep mo..re."

As you neared his bed, you reached over to his bedside table and turned on the lamp. Suddenly, Jay rose from the covers, his hand gripping your wrist, grunting "Jake what did I just say-"

Trailing off, he looked at you with brows furrowed in a mix of annoyance and confusion, before his expressions gradually soften "y/n?"

"dude, you almost gave me a heart attack," you muttered, sighing exasperatedly.

"Sorry, I thought it was Jake trying to disturb me again," he softened his grip and rubbed your wrist as if he had just hurt it, "Did I hurt you?"

"My heart, almost but my hand is fine," you pulled your hand away, "How about you?"

"What about me?"

"You missed class this morning," you crossed your arms.

"It's just one class, no big deal. I just overslept-"

"Is that all?" you raised an eyebrow before pointing at the crumpled muscle relief patch packs and pain relief creams strewn messily across his bedside table, "Did someone overexert himself last night?"

"Fine, I didn't come to class partly because my legs are sore," he shrugged, "but hey, I ran as much as Sunghoon did! Aren't you proud of me?"

"Not if it's at the cost of your legs!" you replied exasperatedly, "Come on, where is the rational Jay that I know? he wouldn't have let his competitiveness and ego cloud his judgements like this."

"It's just normal post-workout sore, I've had it a couple of times before," he reassured, "Also, I may hate running. But I'm actually good at HIIT and strength training so I'm not all that unfit as you think I am. Or he thinks."

"All that just so you can prove him wrong?"

"No of course not, I couldn't care less about him," he huffed, "I just wanted you to know that I can pace well with you too."

"Jay, that does not make it any better-"

"Probably also to convince you that I make a better running partner than Sunghoon," he sniggered.

"Well, guess what, you can't run if your legs are hurt," you quipped.

"Oh shit, that's true," he muttered under his breath, "Well post-workout sore usually last between 3-7 days so I'll be good as new after that. Running partners?" he stretched his hand out as if asking for a handshake.

You sighed, grabbing his outstretched hand, shaking it as if you guys are signing on a pact, "Only if you promise not to overexert yourself next time."

"Promise," his smile widened, "Have you had lunch? I'll cook something up for you."

"Your legs are hurt though."

"They're sore not hurt," Jay emphasized, scooting to the edge of his bed, "Also even if they are hurt, I cook with my hands not legs so..."

You chuckled, "Well sir, if you insists."

"Of course, wouldn't let my girl go out of this house famished," he wrapped an arm over your shoulder, grinning gleefully.

[bi-bard]

You Signed Up for This - Writing Challenge Masterlist

This is a masterlist for my writing challenge for Maisie Peters' album "You Signed Up for This"

Each imagine is based on a different song from that album.

Unlike my last writing challenge, I won't be using a random number generator, I'll just be writing the imagines in order.

I hope that you enjoy!

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1. You Signed Up for This

I Know I'll Get Better, I'm Just Not Better Yet Dean Forester (Gilmore Girls) X Reader (Y/n) realizes that Rory is truly the golden apple of Stars Hollow. However, (Y/n) didn't realize that she would influence so many parts of their personal life.

2. I'm Trying (Not Friends)

But One of Us Has Gotta Try to Keep a Promise Oliver Queen (Arrow) X Reader (Y/n) and Felicity were best friends while Oliver and (Y/n) were together. Now, (Y/n) finds a wall between them once Oliver and Felicity confess their feelings for each other. All they want is answers.

3. John Hughes Movie

'Cause if You Don't Want Me, Then You're Not the One Dean Winchester (Supernatural) X Reader After years of watching the same pattern, (Y/n) realizes that Dean isn't going to choose them. At least, that's the conclusion that (Y/n) draws.

4. Outdoor Pool

And You Only Kissed Me Once; Nothing Changed at All Jess Mariano (Gilmore Girls) X Reader (Y/n) is ecstatic to finally be the first choice. To not come second to anyone else. If only that were the truth of the situation.

5. Love Him I Don't

Guess That Was My Stubborn Season Lonnie Machin (Arrow) X Reader (Y/n) discovers the truth about Lonnie's job and life. Sadly, that's not just something that can be smoothed over with kind words and a kiss.

6. Psycho

Playing a Perfect Patrick Bateman Bruce Wayne (Gotham) X Reader After all that he had through, it took a lot for Bruce to find a group of friends of his own. However, did he care about who had to step on in order to get them to stay?

7. Boy

And I Can Do Better Than This Sam Winchester (Supernatural) X Reader (Season 6) After losing his soul, Sam makes a giant mistake. Once he's back to himself, he realizes that it may not be as easy to fix as he had hoped.

8. Hollow

You Left Me Hollow Barry Allen (The Flash) X Reader (Y/n) had dedicated their life to protecting Central City. However, after a rift is formed between them and Barry, (Y/n) realizes the only way to fill the void is find a new place to save. Somewhere that didn't have The Flash plastered on every window.

9. Villain

I'm Your Villain Ray Palmer (DC's Legends of Tomorrow) X Reader When a perfect thing goes wrong, (Y/n) is understandably upset. They just wanted to take the time to heal and find their rhythm back. Ray doesn't quite understand that.

10. Brooklyn

If You Wanna Take Her Out, You're Gonna Have to Ask Me First Bela Talbot (Supernatural) X Reader Sam and Dean find out that their sibling is hiding a relationship about them. Naturally, the brothers step forward to be protective of (Y/n).

11. Elvis Song

I'm In Over My Head Lance Sweets (Bones) X Reader Fear can be a strong motivator. Lance can also be very persuasive. Sometimes good doesn't mean too good to be true.

12. Talking to Strangers

Talking to Strangers About You Temperance Brennan (Bones) X Reader (Y/n) realizes through a talk with Angela that they aren't the only one rambling about lucky they feel in their current relationship.

13. Volcano

Thought I'd be a Cool Girl but Turns Out I'm Livid Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) X Reader Break-ups can be incredibly messy or clean. It all depends on how both parties act. Lydia decided that the clean route was too boring and (Y/n) is pissed.

14. Tough Act

But I Hope I'm One Tough Act to Follow Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) X Reader There's a collection of books written by a young author named (Y/n) (Y/l/n). However, the books were only published after (Y/n) had passed away. Who was this person so dedicated to keeping (Y/n)'s memory alive?

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Masterlist

What I Write For

Request Guidelines

Some Original Characters

folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)

[allyrose28]

Hello again Caryl fam. Long time no see. I took a break for awhile because spoil freakouts were taking a toll on me back in September. I probably will disappear for a bit again because well.....Spoiler freakouts.  Im getting Find Me freakout flashbacks (funny its been exactly a year so obviously end of January-mid Febuary is NOTT a time of blessings for carylers haha). 

I guess I just wanted to post because I too was sad when I read the spoilers at first. I am feeling better this morning and wanted to contribute to the amazing posts that have already been written by other users calming the anxiety over D0nnie. 

I want to start by saying STAYYY OFF TWITTER. I am not on it but I can imagine the gloating going on by the other side. Let them just let them. This may be their last chance to gloat about anything. 

I know this has been said by other users and written more eloquently than I could ever but I am going to try. I know many are still mad about Leah and how random it was. Yeah it was random, but in Kang’s mind, Leah was used for Daryl's character development. To break his hero complex. Can we all please go back to last year and remember how much we cried and freaked out saying Leah was the end of Caryl. Did Leah end Caryl? not at all. Can we remember the spoilers from last season? Spoilers sources saying Daryl was trying to have Leah come with him because he still loved her. Wishing they never left the cabin. Was there only for Leah and he still cared about her and wanted her to give him another chance. Do we all remember freaking out?.... then it turned out that he was trying to protect his family all along and Leah and Daryl were never meant to be.

The whole Leah thing...there was a reason to the madness of it all. You don’t have to like it, I sure as hell didn't...but i understood where Kang was trying to go with the story development. But this is still Daryl Dixon. Daryl Dixon who for 10 years has never had a relationship. It would make absolutely noooo sense for Daryl to jump into another relationship with c0nnie at this point in time. There is nothing it will add to the story. There is not enough episodes.

Some will argue with me and say “but there is a time jump and Kang loves to make up relationships in time jumps”. Can I say one off tangent thing about that.... People crucify Kang for creating Carol and Zeke during time jump but Gimple was planting those damn seeds since season 7 so if you want to blame anyone blame him. ANYWAY where was I... o yeah ok.  Fine say Kang did that with D0nnie...  used the time jump to put them in a relationship. I mean I personally would be pissed as a D0nnie shipper because she jumped  past all the best parts of a relationship... first kisses first time together.  But ok say she gave D0nnie fans everything they wanted for 8 episodes. How is that going to end? C0nnie will die or they will break up for some reason (Carol). Taking away everything  just as fast as she gave it to them, Upsetting all of them in the end anyway. All the while many Caryl fans will be dropping like flies because they will give up (including me i will stop watching). Kang, GImple, AMC as much as they piss me off sometimes... in the end they neeeddd us. They need our viewership for the spinoff. We know damn well the D0nnie fans wont watch it (maybe hate watch it). All the damage control Kang did with the Leah relationship... it wasn't to calm the D0nnie crowd, it was to calm US because THEY NEED US. I cant stress this enough. From a business point of view having D0nnie together makes no sense at all. Why would you piss off the audience you need for the spinn off. Why would you risk losing us? They saw how upset we got over Find Me spoilers there is no way they are sitting in the writers room thinking... “well I know we had to do a lot of damage control with Leah because we miscalculated how much patience Caryl fans have,,, but lets make D0nnie cannon for a few episodes. Im sure Caryl fans will understand.” They know DAMN WELL we wont understand. They know it will be many peoples final straw. 

Im so frustrated that Kang feels the need to do this and created this shipping war to begin with but whatever it is what it is.  So what can she do to appease that fan base she created because she still needs them until the finale? Well give them this reunion. Make it cute. Let them gloat. Listen Caryl fam...let them have this one. I have a feeling this is going to be the biggest moment their ship will get. And do yourself a favor. Don’t watch it. Just fast forward. After that...there is just no time to throw Daryl into another relationship. Looks like he got plenty of shit to do at the commonwealth. 

Kang has tested my patience to no end and I don’t feel the same love for her as I use to after 11a. I do still trust that Caryl is endgame. They just have to drag it out to the absolute last episode because that is what every TV show has done throughout history. Just again please stay off twitter and spoiler sites. Don’t read the reviews of the episode. This will be hyped up to no end and it will hurt like hell. We will get through it. Now I am going back to my hiding hole. Caryl on <3

[theynanigans]

octopath traveler headcanon list #1 - cooking

welcome to my newest (and first!) series of shitposts where i rate the main characters from octopath traveler based on my strange headcanons purely because i am bored and i have no soul. enjoy! :D -- ophilia: i imagine she'd be pretty decent at cooking, and it does appear like she's willing to learn more about it, too! (judging by her interaction with h'aanit in that one travel banter) probably makes great soup!! very warm + shareable with the entire family party. the only (minor) problem is that her recipes most likely have the same amount of spices and salt in them as something you'd find on a mommy blog - and that means, they contain exactly 0 grams of each, which objectively isn't too bad... you just gotta be into it! -1 for admitting that she's unable to bake -3 for the very apparent lack of seasoning +1 for genuinely trying final score: 7/10 --  cyrus: objectively can't cook. not even when he's reading a cookbook. besides, he's got better things to do. don't bother him. -9 for being too busy with his studies to actually care about cooking +1 for apparently being a sandwich guy according to the octopath traveler café website -1 because his definition of sandwich is most likely something along the lines of "a few loose pieces of paper between two bread slices. maybe add a tomato if you're feeling adventurous." final score: 1/10 --  tressa: disqualified for using hired help +2 for probably having access to a lot of fun ingredients and utensils thanks to her profession?? -∞ for not even bothering to cook something by herself final score: nope/10 --  olberic: not too bad at cooking, i'd assume! i can imagine him making rather rustic, mostly meat, cheese and bread-based food with lots of carbs and proteins, which isn't the best if you're planning to go on a diet or only judging it by its taste, but a great source of energy for physical activities, such as dueling or just flexing in front of someone you adore... or despise. go get those muscles! :)) +0.5 for the strength boost +1 for probably having 1 or 2 recipes he's really good at -4 since it's most likely the best idea not to request anything other than those from him final score: 7.5/10 -- primrose: three words - hot and spicy. you won't be able to tell if your entire face feels like it is is on fire from looking at her or if the burning sensation is caused by what you just took a bite of. don't panic, also don't drink water. this is fine. +1 for the potential to pair up with ophilia and make magic happen +2.5 because mmmm spicy -7 because eating her food without a glass of milk nearby is best described as going to hell but with extra steps final score: 6.5/10 --  alfyn: due to his frequent chats with random strangers, it's safe to assume he has the most experience, general knowledge and recipes out of all the travelers and therefore a great advantage in this ranking! his expertise on herbs and plants comes in handy for cooking, too - and besides that, he'd likely enjoy preparing healthy snacks for everyone - the only downside being that he probably only does so for others and not for himself, so, y’know, just don't forget to give something back to him! +1 for making sure that his friends are feeling well +1 since he's probably the best at making vegetarian food -1 because at least half of his meals end up being some shade of green, and speaking from experience, it isn't wise to trust green food -1 for not taking enough care of himself :(( -1.5 for sometimes getting his cooking and potion ingredients mixed up final score: 8.5/10 --

therion: since there's so little information to base my assumptions on, this one's probably the most absurd headcanon out of all of these, but hear me out...

i believe he's actually very good at cooking?? firstly, he has fire magic and the kind of attitude it takes to start trying to use it for purposes other than fighting. (he might burn down the cooking site but you'll be thanking him for it) secondly, the octopath café website (yes, this is the second time i've used that as a source in spite of its obscurity. deal with it.) specifically states that, as a thief, he doesn't get many occasions to cook, but nothing along those lines gets mentioned for anyone else, despite the fact that you could say the same for all of them/their jobs (excluding h'aanit and maybe ophilia)??? like, there must be something more to that... and i've come to the conclusion that this is it... because it's wholesome as heck. good luck getting him to make something for you, though! +1 for doubtlessly being the underdog of this ranking -1 since your kitchen is somewhat unlikely to survive his cooking techniques -0.5 because there's no way he won't use at least one apple in every meal he will ever prepare -0.5 for exclusivity final score: 9/10 -- h'aanit: it's confirmed that she's a cooking goddess - and not only that - she can hunt, forage and cook. name something that's not perfect about that combination. i'll wait. +1 for being the best -1 for being too good final score: 10/10--

[starship-argo]

I watched the ending of my favorite show (Star Trek: Enterprise) and I am distraught. The ending was the single most dissatisfying thing I have every experience and i’m going to tell you why. Enterprise is set in the year 2151 during the first long space voyage of Starfleet nearly 100 years before The Original Series take place. Great concept if you ask me.

Seasons 1-2 and two are really good. The characters and dynamic and the plots are fun and interesting. They establish the universe in a new way where humans are just breaking into the space scene and you get to learn about the ins and outs of alien culture with the characters in real time.

Season three was hot garbage. Far to much time travel to make any sense, they kill Trip Tuckers sister which sends him into a blatant denial which gets him killed (for the first time we’ll come back to this) The Enterprise travels into a pocket of space called The Expanse where beloved captive Jonathan Archer starts off preaching about how his morals are what make him human and ends up beaming into another ship, stealing their warp coils effectively stranding them with impulse speed 8 million light years from their home with 7 million light years worth of food. This is all fine and i’m willing to over look it because in season 3 we get the development of Trip And T’pols relationship. They are a fantastic couple who very clearly care about each other and fit into a sort of rivals to lovers that is to die for. In one episode they even see a possible future where they get married and have a child (they did half-vulcan half-human long before Spock).

Season three ends on a terrible cliffhanger and the watcher is left disappointed because there is no real ending. Season 4 starts and you can already tell the difference in the writing. (After the bomb of season 3 the show was renewed for one final season with half the budget and 1/4 the audience so the director brought in some Star Trek Novel writers and decided to cater more towards the long time fans rather than trying to gain new ones)

Season 4 eases out of the season 3 style with some tasteful time travel and of course Trip Tucker going through it. emotionally. Then they go back to individual adventures. Season 4 doesn’t really have a big plot with a main bad guy it’s more of 40-80 minute adventures that get resolved nicely. It’s a comfort season and i’m all for it. Then they decide to marry T’pol to the wrong person who quite frankly blackmailed her into it.

All in all season 4 is good up until the very end. The adventures make it seem like it’ll never end and we even get to explore the MirrorVerse for two episodes. And then the season finale. Instead of experiencing the end with the characters they go way forward to The Next Generation time and have the last voyage of the NX-01 Enterprise play through holographic retellings. The crew decided to help out Shran the Andorian (my favorite character) rescue is daughter from some mercenaries. When it seems they’ve gotten away with it bAm the bad guys catch them and in a last ditch effort to save Shran, Trip Tucker (my second favorite charater) Sacrifices himself and blows up a section of the ship. What’s worse is you find out that him and T’pol never got married and he never achieved his dream of becoming a star fleet captain. Trip is used as the series punching bag the whole time, he’s killed at least twice, his sister dies, the love of his life gets married to someone else even though she loved trip back and then they give him the most unsatisfactory death in the history of television. This man has survived countless close calls with death and he gets killed because of some random adventure??? and because this is all playing out over a recording you don’t even really see the characters mourn him!! they just move on with their lives after like 6 hours!!

I have some problems with the show but I do still love it. I wish they gave us a better ending and a longer run but I guess i’ll have to make do with the terrible mistreatment of Charles “Trip” Tucker III

[seiyasabi]

きつね (Fox)

(I wanted to try something different and write a few Romaji (ローマ字) words in Hiragana (ひらがな)! I promise it won’t be throughout the fic, but I thought it would be fun for those learning Japanese to practice :)) 

Here’s a !DARK! Kitsune (きつね) Kakyoin (かきょいん) x Female Reader story! Please proceed with extreme caution! 

TW: !NONCON!, !Foul Dirty talk!, !breeding kink!, !knotting!, !Size kink!, use of pepper spray!, you’re in the forest!,!no prep!, !gagging!,  !predator/prey elements!, violence!, mentions of blood and small wounds!, !mentions of drug use and alcohol! (Not you or in detail),  etc.. 

I’m sorry if this is too OOC!) 

“Go to the forest, they said, it’ll be fun, they said,” You grumble to yourself, nearly tripping over a stray tree root. All you want to do is get out of this damn forest and pass out in your dormitory bed, but it seems like Mother Nature has another plan for you. 

Currently, you’re regretting going into the creepy woods near your college. You’d only gotten to this college a few months prior, having transferred from your college in (prefecture/country) to one in rural Japan, and you thought this would be a fun experience. Your new friends claimed that the parties at a certain campground were wild and entertaining, but so far, you’d only seen a few drunken fights, you watched a girl snort a line off of another girls’ chest, and were almost shoved into the bonfire. After all of this, and the fact that your friends left you alone, you decided it was time to head home. 

But, as it turns out, you walked in the opposite direction of the parking lot, getting yourself absolutely lost in the hauntingly beautiful forest. Cursing yourself for your stupidity, you tried to bring up google maps, only to be stopped by that godforsaken icon of ‘no service.’ 

So, you opted for your phone’s flashlight, trying in vain to figure out where was North and where was South. 

“Fucking hell, I know I didn’t walk too far from the campsite, how did I get so lost?” Stumbling once again, you almost fall flat on your face, only to be stopped by a pale hand. The slender, long fingered hand grips the fat of your forearm in a firm grasp, holding you up. Seeing this, a horrified scream leaves your lips before you can stop it, thinking that the thing in front of you was an Onryō. 

Looking up, you’re suddenly face to face with a large, breathtaking man in a red and white kimono. His long, red hair is twisted into an intricate updo, highlighting his sharp jawline. That, in turn, shows off his dangling earrings, which just barely brush his cheek. His purple eyes twinkle in your phone’s flashlight, a small smirk quirking his full lips. 

“Hello there,” The redhead's voice is smooth, sounding like whipped butter personified, “Are you lost?” 

Knowing better than to expose your vulnerability, you shake your head no, “O-oh, no, sir. I’m just heading back to the party. I’m sorry if I bothered you,” You try to wrench your arm from his grip, but he seemingly grabs on harder. 

“There’s no need to lie, I heard your grumblings a few moments ago. I’ve also watched your sorry attempts of hiking through the foliage, and I’d be happy to help,” You eye him suspiciously, not trusting him for a second. 

“No thank you. I’m not so sure I trust a weird man alone in the forest. I hope you understand,” He laughs at your words, sounding like wind chimes. You shift your feet in discomfort, wondering what is so funny about your cautious words. 

“Don’t be silly. There’s a temple near here that I upkeep, and I was walking to the parking lot to head to a 7/11 near here. I’m heading in the same direction as you, so-“ He continues to speak, but you don’t hear a word. You never mentioned the parking lot, and if he was heading there, you’re pretty sure he would’ve just used a path that you carelessly disregarded. Noticing your sudden change of discomfort to extreme fear, he tries to comfort you, “Why that look? I promise I won’t hurt you. Here, why don’t you come to the temple and-“ 

You don’t give him time to manipulate you, suddenly whipping out your gel pepper spray. Chucking the cap in a random direction, you check that the nozzle is facing him, before spraying at full blast. A loud bark-like scream echoes through the air, as you’re suddenly released by his iron grip. Shoving him over, you start to sprint in the direction you just came from.  

“Come back here!” The red haired man yells, a deep growl reverberating through his chest. That urges you to run faster. Flashlight aimed at the ground, you leap and hop over foliage and debris, trying your hardest to evade the freak of a man currently after you. You can hear his footsteps behind you, the forest suddenly silent. 

Your body runs cold at the realisation; just what is this man, and why are the critters so afraid of him? 

Not deciding to find out, you then run in a zigzag fashion, trying to get him off of your tail. The crunch of sticks and leaves are constant, the loudest ones being the hulking man behind you. 

“You can’t outrun me, Pretty Girl!” 

Your chase goes on for a while longer, until you see the unmistakable light of a fire. This causes you to go faster, the idea of safety appealing. 

But, unfortunately for you, you didn’t notice the undeniable silence ahead of you. When you left, the music was practically earth shattering, along with the chatter of inebriated college kids and the loud noise of their cars and motorcycles. 

When you reach the fire, you’re greeted with the sight of a dark wooden structure. It’s a temple, but it looks a lot bigger than a normal Shintō one. In fact, it looks straight out of the fantasy anime your roommate made you watch with her. 

Taking your chances with the forest, you turn to run back into the dark green foliage, only to be tackled back first onto the stick covered dirt below. The twigs stab into your uncovered covered skin, drawing blood, as the kimono clad man above you pants in both pain and anger. 

He brings his face close to yours, making you turn yours away from his with a whimper. His warm breath fans across your uncovered neck, his purple eyes practically glowing down at you. The white around his irises are bright red and teary, showing the effect your weapon has against him. In the lightly you notice two flattened ears on the top of his head, making you gasp in surprise and confusion. Was this a guardian of the Forest? Or was this a demon here to steal your soul? 

“Why must you hurt me? I haven’t done anything to you,” He sounds somewhat hurt that you maced him, but who could blame you? If some creep approaches you in the forest, you fight first, ask questions later. 

“Why are you coming after me? There’s no reason for you to chase after me,” One of his rough hands grips your chin, forcing you to look up at him. His mouth is parted slightly, his sharp teeth glinting in the fire light as his face twists into a smirk. 

“It’s always fun chasing after prey,” He leans in closer, lips just barely touching yours, “Especially when the prey is as adorable as you. Now, we can do this the hard way, or the easy way; if you let me have you, we can go at your pace. If you don’t, I’ll take you however I want.” 

To say you’re shocked is an understatement, “Wha-what do you mean, ‘take me’? Didn’t you just say that you’re going to eat me?” 

“Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. I’m still quite full from the meal I had earlier. I should thank those villagers; without them, I wouldn’t have been able to eat those delicious friends of yours,” All blood leaves your face, did he just say that he ate-

Looking at his kimono, you realise that the red isn’t a pattern at all; it’s blood splatter! 

“Oh my god,” You place a shaking hand on his chest, trying to push him away, “What the fuck? Holy shit- is that why the forest is so quiet? They know it’s your feeding time? Holy fuck-“ He silences you with a heated kiss, practically forcing his tongue down your throat. Lithe hands grope at your cropped tank top covered breasts, trying to squeeze the fat underneath, only to be blocked by your push up bra. Shoving with your entire weight, you’re still unable to force him off of you. Without thinking, you bite down on his tongue, drawing out another bark of pain from the ginger. 

That gives you enough time to breathe and regain your composure. Trying to wiggle out from underneath the muscular male, you’re quickly lifted and flipped onto your front, face pressed against the dirty ground. 

“My mother always told me that females are hard to get, but I never knew it would be this painful,” He spits a mouthful of blood out onto the ground near your head, making you cringe away from that spot, scraping your chest against a particularly sharp twig. A small yelp escapes your throat at the pain, trying in vain to use your arms as a barrier against the sticks and stones below you, “Awe, did my pretty girl hurt herself? That’s okay, I’ll still think that you’re pretty.” 

“Get off of me! What are you trying to do? If you’re going to eat me, get over with it already!” Finally being able to push yourself up onto your forearms, you try to buck him off of you, only to hear a high pitched whine echo out from behind you. Freezing in surprise, you peek at him from, only to be met with a ruby red face. 

“Did you know that foxes go through a mating season?” 

“What the hell does that have to do with any-?” You’re suddenly shoved back onto the floor, tits practically spilling out of your top. 

“I’m going to breed your empty womb, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You’re going to bear me many cute pups, and you’re going to stay here with me until the end of your days.” 

“Go find some female kitsune! I don’t want to have your babies!” Your stomach scrapes painfully against stones below you, dripping more blood onto the dirt. 

“But that’s the thing- you don’t get a choice, Pretty Pretty. You clearly can’t care for yourself! You got lost in the woods, for Gods’ sake! Now, obey your mate, and let me in,” He looks down at your cute mini-skirt, and flips it over your ass, exposing your emerald green thong. His cool fingers ghost over your unblemished ass cheeks, a hitched breath echoing through the Kitsune’s chest, “Oh, pretty girl, did you wear this for me? How did you know my favourite colour?” 

“Get off of me! I didn’t do any-“ He suddenly rips your panties from your cute cunt, before shoving them into your open mouth. You try to spit it out, but are unable to. Tears gather in your eyes, as you start to cry. This strange man is about to do the worst thing a person can do, and he doesn’t seem to care about your feelings. 

“Don’t cry, I’ll take care of you and our pups,” He spreads your legs open, giving him easier access to your soft pussy, “Ah, there’s your pretty cunt. Everything about you is so pretty, aren’t you lucky? If it weren’t for that and your perfect fertile womb, I would’ve eaten you.” 

He kneels on your shins, shoving down your front, arching your ass up into the air. 

“You smell amazing. It’s like your body is just calling for my thick seed. Don’t worry, Pretty Girl,

I’ll give it to you.” 

You hear his kimono shift, most likely pulling out his cock. This makes you choke on your sobs, as you try to pretend that this moment isn’t happening. That some monster of the forest isn’t about to breed you full of his-

A scream escapes your throat the moment you feel his wet cock head against your unprepared pussy. You thought he’d at least prepare your cunt, but it seems that he’s trying to go in dry. He grunts when he feels you starting to thrash, using the hand that once held his cock to smack your ass harshly. 

“Stop it. You can’t change my mind! Jotaro will be so jealous when he finds out I got the most beautiful, fertile, and resourceful mate. Now, hold still,” You don’t understand what he’s talking about, but you can’t help but feel shame. You know his friend’s name, but not his own! The least your rapist could do is tell you his name! As if sending this, he rubs one of your ass cheeks reassuringly, “I suppose you’d like to know your mate’s name, huh? I’m Noriaki Kakyoin. There’s no need for you to say your name, I heard you introduce yourself to those… disgusting humans earlier. But don’t worry, you won’t have to deal with them ever again.” 

He releases your ass in favour of gripping his cock once more, pushing its tip into you with some trouble. You scream through your makeshift gag, the pain of him pushing in feeling like he’s tearing your pussy apart. 

“Awe, are you a virgin? My mom always said a female’s first time is painful,” You want to shove a stick up his ass unlubed! Let’s see how he likes getting something forced inside of him without preparation! “But don’t worry, you should feel good once I’m fully inside.” 

With that, he forces himself in until he’s fully seated inside of you. Another scream escapes your throat, as you feel a small rivulet of blood dribble from your now torn cunt. By this point, you’re hyperventilating in pain, anxiety, and fear. This man is so thick, that you’re pretty sure your pussy will never go back to its original size ever again. 

“Fuck, you’re so tight. I knew you were the right one for me,” When he starts to move, that’s when one of your hands claws at one of his that’s resting on your hip. You feel his skin break under your nails, as you try in vain to make him stop. It feels like he’s splitting you in two! “Does my pretty girl feel good?” You shake your head rapidly, drowning in your pained sobs, “Don’t lie, I feel you getting wet.” 

Can’t he smell that that’s blood? 

You hiccup and wheeze, tears and snot dripping down your pretty face into the dirt. When he starts to buck his hips, you feel like you’re going to throw up. His cock is so heavy inside you, that you feel like he’s rearranging your guts. 

“I feel the opening of your womb on my tip, it’s almost like you’re trying to suck my cock into it!” Kakyoin starts to move his hips faster, making your body go limp. It’s almost like your body is going into shock at the severe pain you’re in, “You sure want my pups, even if you claim you don’t. I’m so close to filling you with my seed, so you won’t have to wait any longer to be filled!” 

He bucks into you at top speed, his own hips crashing into yours harshly. His heavy sack smacks against your ignored clit, sending small jolts of pleasure through your body. But, it’s not enough to make this easier for you. Your pussy is barely producing any slick, making this a lot harder for you to handle. The next time this happens, you know there’s going to be a next time, you should probably explain to him how to prepare you for his horse cock. 

“Shit, shit, I’m gonna fill you up, Pretty Girl. I’m going to make you heavy with five pups, hell, maybe even fifteen! Then once you have them, I’ll fill you up with even more! Doesn’t that sound nice? Your womb will never be lonely again!” 

He thrusts into you with three more powerful thrusts, before slamming his entire length inside of you at once. The head of his cock is right up against your womb, so when his entire length starts to swell, you can practically feel it prying at your cervix. More fat tears rain down your face in this rivulets, your fingers digging into the dirt, cutting up your nimble hands. Kakyoin grunts and growls in a deep voice, savouring the way your walls throw around him in pain. 

Whilst his cock is fully swollen, he releases all the cum he has into you. The large amount of seed isn’t all able to force its way into your cervix, causing it to pool in the canal of your cunt, bloating your stomach out slightly. 

“I can practically smell my seed taking. Your perfect body is accepting me very well, Pretty Pretty. I told you that we’re mates, and this just proves it,” he strokes your head softly, trying to console you as you continue to cry. At this point, he starts to become concerned, why haven’t you stopped crying? “What’s wrong? Didn’t you cum?” 

When you don’t shake or nod your head, he releases one of your hips, in favour of yanking your panties out of your mouth, allowing you to breathe with ease and finally speak. 

“You’re such a Monster,” You sob, face pressed against the cool packed dirt below you, “I-I can’t believe you-if you were going to rape me why didn’t you prepare me?” He makes a small whimpering noise, not quite understanding your gripe. 

“What do you mean?” You start to cry even harder, almost making yourself sick. 

“My pussy is torn open! I’m bleeding! The only one who felt nice is you!” You start to gag, unable to catch your breath properly without somewhat choking on your spit and snot, “Now I’m pregnant with your rape babies, and-and it hurts so bad! Get out of me!” 

You try to yank yourself off of his inflated cock, but he quickly stops you, trying not to hurt you even more. Looking down, he sees a large pool of blood below the place the both of you are connected. He gasps in shock. Sure, he knew that some girls bleed their first time, but this doesn’t look right! 

“What-why are you bleeding so much?” 

“Because you tore me open! I hate you! I hate you! I wish you just killed me!” 

Whilst he’s still stuck inside you, you continue to cry, which makes him feel even worse. He can’t believe that he hurt you so severely. This was never his intention, after all, both parties are supposed to feel good, are they not? 

But now, he’ll never be able to make you love him. 

How could you love someone as monstrous as him? 

[flightfoot]

Miraculous Ladybug Season 4 Episode rankings (As of Optygami’s release)

ML season 4 has knocked it out of the park so far! It’s been absolutely amazing, and I’ve greatly enjoyed every episode.

That being said, some episodes have still been better than others (or have contained elements I find more appealing at least), so what better way to show that than with a ranking?

9. Queen Banana

We got a new hero this episode, and she is awesome! Vesperia and Chat have a nice little interaction, and while Vesperia gets taken out, it’s for a good reason - distracting Queen Banana so Ladybug can put glue in her pocket, disarming her. It was a really nice way of showing Zoe’s humility and ability for teamwork, even when it meant giving up the starring role, in order to complete the group’s overall goal.

The mini-movie felt like foreshadowing, what with the “Superheroine of Creation” being an obvious Ladybug expy, while the “Supervillain of Destruction” was a Chat Noir expy, though with fewer connections. Interestingly, it’s also used to parallel Zoe’s and Chloe’s relationship, with Zoe even quoting from the movie at the end.

And Andre’s character development was top-notch! Bully him around to do material things as much as you like, but hurting Zoe is off-limits. She’s Andre’s daughter too.

So why is it so low down? Simply put, it didn’t feel like it changed things as much as Sole Crusher did, nor did it showcase Marinette’s and Adrien’s relationship as much. It was good, but there was less to talk about concerning it than I thought there’d be.

8. Furious Fu

The first episode of Season 4 aired (even though it was episode 6 in production order), we got some lore drop this episode! Su Han gave us a better idea of what to expect from the Guardians and what their relationship with the kwamis had been like overall. Poor Plagg especially, he’s just treated like a bomb that could go off at any moment.

I especially liked seeing Ladybug and Chat Noir’s relationship this episode, and their differing reactions to Su Han and his proposals. Ladybug was insecure about not having defeated Hawkmoth yet and thought Su Han might have a point about the Miraculous being better in other hands, and for this to be something for the Guardians to handle.

Chat Noir meanwhile didn’t give a crap about Su Han’s authority, about this random guy who just showed up and tried to boss them around; but he DOES respect Ladybug’s, and made that known. That he’d give up his Miraculous, his ticket to freedom and also the vessel for one of his closest friends, Plagg, but only at LADYBUG’S request, not this dude.

But it also showed the limits of that, with him refusing to go along with even that when it’d mean that Ladybug would get amnesia. That he’d not only lose his Miraculous, but his closest, dearest friend as well.

The episode was well done, but just didn’t feel like it either changed things as much or showcased character development as much as the other entries on this list, which is why it’s lower.

7. Sole Crusher

This was our first look at a new character, Zoe, and she did not disappoint! She was absolutely adorable and I really felt for her, with needing to pretend to be nasty in order to not be practically disowned from her family. 

It showcased how much Marinette had grown as well, with having Marinette see through Zoe’s Mean Girl act when they reunite and not jump to hasty negative conclusions, like she did with Adrien, instead considering that there may have been other factors involved with making Zoe act differently while with Chloe.

Also character exploration and growth for Andre, of all characters! Very unexpected. I really wanted him to succeed in his original dream, and I was thrilled at him comforting Zoe, with him empathizing with her, with acting as a parent towards her, even with her being his stepdaughter and presumedly not knowing her very well before this.

Zoe’s ability to anticipate how she’d need to act in order to conform with her family’s expectations while still getting to do what she wanted (for the most part), like with her pretending to be all prissy and stuck up when interacting with Audrey, or pretending that her messaging with Marinette was a setup to betray and humiliate her, showed a great understanding of the people around her as well as some great acting ability. And her realization of how she’d been putting on acts like this for so long before this, of her people-pleasing and afterwards attempting to just be herself, felt like foreshadowing for Adrien’s own arc.

 And we got a few seconds of Marichat. Yay for crumbs!

6. Mr. Pigeon 72

This episode was PACKED. We got to see the followup to Gang of Secrets, with Ladybug freaking out and Alya trying to center her, as well as some followup to Lies, with Marinette trying to “help” Kagami get back together with Adrien. And on top of the stuff that forms the premise of the episode, we got to see Rena Rouge be badass again, Plagg and Ladybug team up, and even Umbrella scene 2, which I don’t think ANYONE saw coming!

Marinette was a lot of fun and we got to see some good stuff from Kagami and Alya here. It felt a little disjointed with how much was crammed into it and I missed Chat Noir, but overall it was really good!

5. Guiltrip

What an amazing episode! Rose is one of the least developed members of the class, mostly being known for being really sweet and being Juleka’s girlfriend, and not much else. Here, we got an inner look at her, at WHY she’s so positive, and how powerful that positivity can be. That she’s not innately positive just because, but that it’s a choice she makes.

Plus the class is AMAZING here. They care about their friends SO MUCH, even if they go about it the wrong way. We got to see Juleka and Rose caring about each other, and even though it went wrong, Rose understands why Juleka ended up spilling her secret and doesn’t blame her for it.

It also really showcased Marinette and Adrien, there different ways of dealing with serious issues, with Marinette jumping ahead and trying to do whatever she thinks will help immediately (help now, ask questions later) while Adrien tried to do the opposite, asking Juleka what she wanted first and trying to stick with that (ask questions first, then help). Both can be useful, depending on the circumstances.

Also got to see a bit more about Adrien’s turmoil, with him being borderline suicidal, and Nino feeling guilty that he wasn’t able to help Adrien with his father, hinting that something bad went down with Gabriel before this. 

There was just a LOT to unpack with this episode, but it all fit together neatly!

4. Lies

All of the “Truth” related episodes were amazing! Lies being no exception. Also our first (and so far only) Adrien-centric episode this season.

Lies catapulted discussion of Adrien’s looming identity crisis, as well as his deflections and near-suicidal behavior, stuff that becomes even more apparent in Guiltrip. The breakup was handled well, with it not being Adrien’s fault (he had to leave and lie for the same reasons Marinette did), but with Kagami’s reaction being totally understandable and valid. She was a very active participant in it, even testing to see whether Adrien had lied. And she was ALLOWED to be pissed afterwards, to not trust him, even though she could tell that he wasn’t just doing this for no reason. 

I wish we’d gotten more time with her as an akuma, but I can see why we didn’t. There just wasn’t that much time in the episode, and the emotional crux of the episode occurred between her and Adrien - there just wasn’t much she could do as an akuma that was gonna add much impact to the episode.

3. Optygami

Oh WOW did this episode make an impact. Major Wham episode in a season chockful of major revelations, status quo changes, and character progression.

 Nathalie and Gabriel actually had a pretty clever plan, spying on the revealed wielders this whole time using the “one sentimonster per wielder, but there can be multiple sentimonsters from different wielders out at the same time” loophole. It meant that Nathalie was actually doing something while she was benched, and I’m willing to bet that she’s the one who came up with the plan in the first place. Say what you will about her morality or her taste in men, but she is an effective supervillain who may be an assistant (and totally fine with that role, which isn’t so common), but one with a lot of agency. And using impostors and try to force a situation where Ladybug would have to give a Miraculous to one of them, and using that opportunity to plant a spy sentimonster in a Miraculous in order to discover Ladybug’s identity and the location of the other Miraculous? Was inspired!

We were baited on there being a Reveal, but that wasn’t exactly a shocker. In any case, we did have a bunch of OTHER cool, impactful stuff. 

Hawkmoth stepped up his game with his sentimonsters, making a couple of impostors to control the situation, with Senti Alec and Senti Nino. Seems like foreshadowing about there potentially being more sentimonsters in disguise...

The major developments everyone’s screaming about though, are:

1. Alya getting her Miraculous permanently, being the first “temporary” wielder to get that honor, and putting her in a greater position to help with any akuma that’s causing more trouble than usual.

2. And the one that’s gotten everyone theorizing, screaming, and writing fics: Chat Noir and Ladybug’s seemingly deteriorating relationship, with a special emphasis on how left out Chat is and just how much he’s being kept in the dark, and how he’s beginning to realize this, feeling unneeded. How much Chat’s hiding his hurt, and how that’s going to lead to some sort of emotional confrontation or breakdown down the line.

My ranking of Optygami may go up or down depending on whether future episodes follow through on what it sets up, especially with the foreshadowed Ladynoir confict.

Looks like we’re gonna have a hiatus after Optygami, considering that we don’t currently have airdates for any more episodes, but what a note to leave off on!

2. Truth

This episode was AMAZING. We got to see Luka and Marinette just hanging out casually, having fun together, like with the little trivia game they played on the way to the theater. Luka even showed a bit of a playful side, with setting up the last question so that the answer would end with “kiss me”. 

Luka was also allowed to feel negative emotions for reasons aside from protecting Marinette, with him feeling down and a little abandoned because of Marinette constantly ditching - something that was given more context, with how we learned that he never knew his father, and how much it bothers him that his mom won’t tell him who it was.

The revelation of Jagged Stone being Luka’s father was one that’d already been leaked way back in January, though few people believed it at the time and it got little attention. It gave Luka a plotline that had nothing to do with Marinette, something that was sorely needed and one that I’m hoping gets expanded on later.

Also had some great Ladynoir, with Chat Noir and Ladybug discussing their relationship during the akuma fight, when they were forced to be truthful to boot! Ladybug really does like Chat’s sense of humor, and Chat doesn’t have a problem with Ladybug’s status as Guardian, so long as it doesn’t interfere with their relationship.

1. Gang Of Secrets

Gang of Secrets was a great followup to Truth, showing Marinette attempting to cope with with breakup, and the subsequent realization that she has to lie to everyone always, and how little time and trust that leaves for her regular relationships.

Meanwhile, the people around Marinette worry and try to help and comfort her as best they can, even when they don’t really know what’s wrong or what to do. From the Girl Squad to Chat Noir to... kind of the kwamis (though with them it’s more lack of understanding of romantic relationships rather than lack of knowledge that holds them back), everyone attempts to help her, but it’s just not feasible under the circumstances for her to be helped the way she needs to be while keeping her secrets.

And in order to keep those secrets, she snaps, forcing all her friends away.

But they don’t take that easily. They want to be there for Marinette, they want to be friends, and become akumatized specifically in order to find out what was wrong, comfort her, fix whatever it was, and become friends again. They really care for her a lot.

And then- AND THEN-!

ALYA DEAKUMATIZES HERSELF

BECOMES RENA ROUGE AGAIN

AND MARINETTE EVEN CONFESSES THAT SHE’S LADYBUG TO HER.

It’s one of the biggest changes to the status quo we’ve had. Like, Master Fu being introduced changed what Marinette was doing, meaning that they could call on new heroes and she had someone to discuss Miraculous stuff with besides Tikki, and Master Fu renouncing his Guardianship and passing it on to Marinette changed what Marinette was doing on a day-to-day basis more, but... well, it didn’t represent as big of a change in themes, of things that had been built up for seasons. Breaking the Secret Identity Rule? DOES.

Also sets up for some potential LadyNoir conflict down the line, with her not having told Chat that she told her identity to someone else yet. I’m sure they’ll be okay in the end, but it could test their relationship and the rules they’ve lived by since they started being superheroes.

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So that’s my ranking with the episodes we’ve had released so far. We’re a third of the way through the season and I gotta say, I’m really happy with it so far! Can’t wait to see what the rest of the season has in store for us.