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#If im wrong its none of my business
cowpokezuko · 11 days
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I think everyone who points out typos in my posts should maybe walk into the ocean. If I make a mistake you should just shift realities so that I'm right actually.
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whyyyyy are dog people so obsessed with their pet taking a shit...
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vampyretaemin · 5 months
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i actually feel so crazy whenever people are like "we shouldnt assume taemin's sexuality!" bc there is truly a wealth of evidence that hes some flavor of queer. why are shawols doing this to me
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bmpmp3 · 5 months
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dysgraphic artiƨts risɘ UP!!!!!
#raise your pencils!!!! and erasers. to fix the backwards letters 😔#sorry still thinking about my weirdness with my art professors. yknow a lot of em have been really pushing us as#students to make our personal identities a major part of like our 'brand' as artists#which. well from an art history major perspective thats a very contentious and nuanced topic. i love a lot of artists who live this way#and i think its great seeing my peers who focus on identity thrive. but also as an fine arts major (double major fool LOL)#i keep getting pushed by teachers into like. specific '____ artist' identities???#specificaly woman artist. which is a little bizarre because im a bit fat and a bit gnc so im generally like. ungendered? in day-to-day life#(which doesnt actually matter to me directly that much honestly LOL people tend to view me as like. buddy? buddy or pal.)#(not man. not woman. not anything human. sometimes i remind people of a beloved dog. which. hkdsahjk thats its own can of worms)#(a can of worms that also doesnt matter much to me directly because im a wannabe furry who chose to be the dog when playing house as a kid)#(LOL so um. well. theres that) but yeah i dunno i dont really consider myself a woman artist. its been. shockingly (and sometimes luckily?)#irrelevant to most of my life and experiences and art (although dont get me wrong misogyny is very real and very present) so i dont#have a whole lot to say about it from an art perspective. you could also call me all kinds of things. a queer artist. a mixed race artist#again technically correct. some aspects more visible in my work than others. but also very technical. i focus on race a lot in in my#art historical work but i dunno how much my drawings have to say. except that i keep making too many mixed ocs LOL#i dunno i just think my professors gotta focus that energy away from tokenizing me and over to supporting like actual#capital W Woman artists capital Q Queer artists capital A Artists of Colour who are doing far more interesting things than I#far more thought out and engaged in these topics directly. i just kind of stumble into my art blindly and confused <3#sorry that was a long tangent WHAT IM SAYING Is despite all that: i do consider myself a capital D Dysgraphic artist#i think its an unmovable constant of my art and the way i draw and the way my hands move. the untrained eye doesnt seem to be as aware#of it directly. but those who are familiar can probably see it. the dysgraphia LOL if not just from whenever i write a letter or number#half of them are busted and frantically fixed HDKJSDJDS but its in all my art. if u can see it <3 ive been trying to embrace it#dygraphic artists raise your pencils indeed!! and throw away the eraser!!! make the legibility of your words everyone elses problem!!!#what does that say? what is that sketch? none of my business! none of your business!! its the business of my hand and the pencil alone#motor skill and spatial issues take the wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel
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drsunshineee · 20 days
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whats worse than having only like 1-5 friends?
having only that many friends and you talk to only 1 more than once every two months!
#absolute traumadump in tags!#ive never had a friend where im as important to them as they are to me#for most of my life ive had one or none friends at any given time#attaching myself desperately to anyone who could tolerate me without constant insults#my 4 (3 now i guess) friends all have people they can turn to if they lose one to three people#i have no one#ive never had anyone that was a friend that i didnt either distance myself from so i wouldnt end up over attached#or attach myself to.#my best friend all through elementary constantly let people interrupt our conversations and i was her least favourite friend#i once briefly had a mutual bestie#who then turned around and didnt let me have other friends or acquaintences at all#i still stayed by his side! for years!!!#he kept me isolated after he moved past me even.#my support system is exclusively online at this point#i regain two friends!#now they talk to eachother daily and im lucky if they message me more than three times a year#im trying#at least one of them seemed happy to see me last time i saw them#the other hasnt even paid attention to me in one on one conversations#and all i have is them and two people i met here#and im scared its my fault#am i just a bad friend?#am i just like *him?*#am i somehow worse#i miss having more than these frienfs#even if the others threatened to hit me and constantly called me selfish at least they were there sometimes#i know people get busy but.#months where they messaged others while ignoring me?#what did i do wrong? where did i fuck up? ill fix myself ill hide myself just. please talk to me. please. its so lonely out here.
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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i just find it kinda interesting how i get plenty of mean anons when i simply vent abt being in love w someone who's w someone else???? i've never gotten as many weird condescending and mean asks as i have venting abt this situation..... like honestly that is kinda fkn weird 💀 esp since it's one of the most normal things in life and like idk i just think it's weird that ppl see me sad abt having love for someone that cant go anywhere more and ppl are like "omfg i cant take this i have to be cruel to this stranger i dont even know just bc they're sad abt being unhappily in love". like fr wtf is wrong w some ppl... how is this anyone's business... 💀
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hellwurld · 29 days
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when they r hating on someone in the discord server but i actually agreed with the person 😨
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puppmeo · 1 month
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Have you ever been assumed to be romantically attracted to someone and even just the thought of that makes you want to throw up . Anybody
#had someone's husband in my dms going on about how i want this bitch romantically and frankly if i hadn't been so busy crying i would've#actually thrown up . absolutely disgusting idea . vile even . horrid concept#anyway tldr im down a best friend because he didn't tell me anything i was doing was wrong after telling me that everything was okay and#then sent his husband after me to call me a creep that was obsessed with him that also apparently tried to make out w him#the same trip that my best friend of five years told me he hated having me in his hometown to see him graduate.#this was after i found out my cat had been murdered and mutilated and thrown in my granma's garden . that day happened to be my birthday#because my ma was kind enough to drive me and my lil brother down there to go see him graduate bc he was also supposed to move in w us the#month after . and he told me right after i got home that he 'didn't think it would be good for our relationship' and apparently#just didn't know how to tell me until a month before it was supposed to happen . bonkers times over here#anyway i didn't want to make out with him . he cried after i wouldn't have sex w him just last december . which i specifically got high as#shit to avoid . and i dont even have like. actual examples of what i was doing wrong to go off of so now i just get to live in mystery#forever ig. like shocker that the person that's been my best friend for five years would tell his husband to say that to me and not say that#shit to me himself . this is a wild to me . i feel like im going insane . can anybody even hear me what's going on#you know its bad when your mama gets so sick of you crying over a friend that she hugs you for the first time in years#also i cant sleep my head hurts . crying is evil . devils liquid . might watch rpdr or something . still nauseous over the idea of being#into him romantically btw . like still nauseous over that . like what a fucking insult to our entire friendship#does saying that we may as well have been made of the same atoms mean like . nothing . does nothing ive said to or about him not mean anythi#ng if its not romantic in nature . what did i do that wasnt enough for him. i fucking told him he outgrew me and that was fine i just#wanted to know if we were still friends or not and he said we were and i believed him. if he told me the sky was green i would make it so#ripping my hair out . am i being dramatic . am i the only person that wasn't expecting this . am i the only one that didn't know#when i had to tell people who knew about the moving plans that he changed his mind the first fucking thing i was told was “i thought it migh#t happen.“ WELL I FUCKINH DIDN'T . AND NOBODY TOLD ME#this is like . the second most humiliating moment of my life . aside from movinggate because at least nobody irl has to know about this#anyway . this boy could've taken my blood and i'd sit there and smile while he did it because he was my best friend .#i was so glad we got to grow up together. i miss him already. im taking my little brother to school my myself for the first time and all im#gonna wanna do is tell him about it . im tired . i want to sleep . im still so nauseous . did none of it mean anything just because ive#never and will never like him romantically. does that make everything less worthy somehow#i hope he never talks to me again. i dont think i could handle this again. he let is fucking husband say that shit to me. not him.#puppmeo misery
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ghostfucking · 3 months
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I dont need to say anything
If it's true, it will be known
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guess--monster · 1 year
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.
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ilovewomenfr · 1 month
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just take your shit and go
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click before reading
ex!abby, bottom!reader
men dni!!!! NSFW
cw: pretty vanilla, fingering (r!receiving), oral (r!receiving), praise kink, make up sex, idk what else
a/n: yall i thought i would be done this on tuesday. ive been so busy this week w work and life ive barely had time to write. this one’s a bit short but i had to get this idea down. i might improve it some time in the future. not proofreading and i kind of dont like it but thats ok. also requests are open as always. AND THANK YOU FOR SM SUPPORT ON YOU ARE SUCH A NERD! I GENUINELY WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT. xx.
you and your ex broke up two weeks ago, a huge fight blew up between the two of you which is why abby is at the door of your apartment, backpack slung over her shoulder, to collect the rest of her things. when you answer the door, you see abby’s gaze rake over your body.
“seriously abs?” you scoff at her, looking down at your abby’s baggy t-shirt, “do i get my shirt back?” she asks as she rolls her eyes at you, gesturing to the band tee. “oh. uh. yeah. i guess” you respond in a quiet tone.
“do you want a drink or something?” you offer and abby shakes her head, her blonde braid moving along with. the braid she would only take out at home when she was with you. the braid you used to tug on when she was drunk off your pussy to see her half-lidded blue eyes. you lick your bottom lip at the thought before shaking it away.
“are you gonna let me come in?” abby asks in a slightly annoyed tone. you get out of the doorway and allow her to come into the apartment. “most of your stuff is on the couch,” you mumble as you point over to the piles of things you threw onto the couch in a blind rage the night she left.
“aw how sweet of you to put everything on the couch for me.” abby says sarcastically, resulting in an eye roll from you. “just take your shit and go.” you grab a couple boxes and put them on the coffee table. you watch as she starts packing away her clothes into the boxes, standing awkwardly. “so this is it then?” you ask,
“what do you mean?”
“all it took was a fight.”
abby walks over to you, crossing her arms and resting her weight on her hip, “you were the one who told me to get out and never talk to you again, if i remember correctly.”
“because i was mad. i didnt actually expect you to go.” you look up to her eyes, trying to find any trace of resentment, but you find none. instead you still find love, “why are you looking at me like that?” she puts her hands on your waist, instinctively your own arms wrap around her neck. “im not looking at you like anything.”
“you are.” you play with her braid, “you’re looking at me like you still care.” she leans in and kisses you, catching you by surprise. the kiss is full of longing and desire. the way she holds you makes you feel as though a fire is stirring within you. she pulls away and sighs, walking back to the couch and sitting down.
“youre so confusing. i mean you tell me to go then dont want me to go? then you dont even text me for two weeks and when you finally do its because you want my stuff out of the apartment.” you nod, knowing you’re in the wrong here. “but i still care about you y/n.” abby leans back on the couch, practically beckoning you to come and sit on her lap.
you make your way over to the couch, sitting in silence as the both of you look at each other, tension growing in the air. “im sorry. i shouldn’t have told you to go.” you apologize, breaking the silence. “i shouldn’t have left.” her voice is softer than before, her hand find its way to your knee and her thumb brushes soothingly along your skin. the apology hangs over the two of you, and once again your eyes meet. abby’s eyes have a look of desire in them, one you know all too well. that’s all it takes for you to climb over and straddle her.
her hands find your hips immediately, “i’ve missed you, ya know.” you say gently, “prove it.” your hands hold her face and you kiss her again, sensually and slowly. abby’s hands run up your back to your hair trying to deepen the kiss. you part you lips and your tongue meets hers. you almost moan at the familiar taste, but you pull away instead, “does that prove it?” she lowers you onto the couch so you’re below her, “haven’t proved it quite yet.” she murmurs as she captures your lips once more. her hands slide up under your shirt as your tongues dance together, palming and squeezing your breasts, the simple action resulting in arousal shooting down to your core. she captures your moans with her mouth, before planting kisses down your neck, suckling the sweet skin.
moments later both your clothes are on the floor as abby kisses your inner thighs, “abs please” you beg, “i need you.” she looks up at you, “mm look at you begging for me, so needy, huh?” she goes back to sucking and kissing your thighs and you push her head towards your soaked pussy, “abbyyyy please.” you beg, “hm? what do you need pretty girl? need me to eat your pussy?” she nudges your clit with her nose eliciting a needy whine from you. “fuck, just eat me out already! please!” your begs are desperate now, your aching cunt waiting for attention. she pulls your legs over her shoulders and laps your slick, the sensation drawing a shiver from you. your hands clutch her hair as she begins sucking your clit, “fuck abby yeah” the moan is involuntary and in response you feel the vibration of her own.
youre a complete mess under her by the time the knot in your stomach snaps, your release dripping out of you pussy and onto your thighs. abby just keeps going, lewd sounds leaving you and echoing around your living room. she slips her fingers into you and curls them, your back arches as she repeatedly hits your g-spot, “so fuckin pretty when you’re falling apart baby” she murmurs softly. she uses her thumb on your clit and it’s like you’re on top of the world, your cries are becoming pornographic at this point and it’s just egging her on, “yeah, you like my fingers filling you dont you?” she nips your hip, “mmhh yeahhh. fuck baby ‘m gonna cum!” she keeps hitting your g-spot and the pressure building up inside of you reaches its peak, you feel your legs shaking as you cum on her fingers, “youre doing so good for me baby.” she lets you ride out your high on her before sliding her fingers out, “fuck i missed you so much abby” you say, she kisses you, “i missed you too”
tags: @jamiesturniolo
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rafeandonlyrafe · 7 months
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safe
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words: 1.1k
warnings: home break in (not really described though), drug dealer!rafe and reader, pregnant!reader, husband!rafe
“r-rafe.” your voice is timid and shaky, so unlike what rafe is normally used to hearing. he instantly knows something is off, wrong.
“baby, what is it?” rafe asks into the phone, wishing he could see your face right now, could read the emotion in your expression.
“something uh-something happened. the police are here.”
“shit, are you alright?” rafe is suddenly moving away from the party, needing the noise of music from the live band and people talking and laughing to stop drowning out your words. “is the baby alright? did barry get caught?”
“yeah, we are both fine.” you press your hand against your stomach, the spot your baby always kicks, glad when you feel her stomp against your skin, reminding you she's okay, even if you don't currently feel like you are. “its not the business. there were some um… robbers.”
“what?” rafe shouts, knowing he probably just made you jump over the phone, but he can't help the loud reaction, needing more information, and needing it now.
“yeah they came into the house. i hid in the closet, but they found me. they didn't do anything, just shoved me a bit. they did take a lot of the jewelry you got me, i don't know what else, you'll have to talk to the police and give them a full invento-”
“shit, y/n!” rafe interrupts you. “i don't care about our stuff! i only care about you and the baby. im coming home right now.”
“okay.” you whisper over the phone. “im sitting on the front porch.”
“and police are watching you?” rafe asks, hurrying to his car, not bothering to explain to anyone his sudden leaving as he tears out of the parking lot.
“yeah, they're here. don't worry, im safe. i don't think they even had weapons, at least none that i saw.” rafe can hear you take a shuddering breath, his heart breaking that he wasn't there with you, foot pressing down even harder on the pedal to get him there faster. “the police think they broke in and expected no one to be home because of midsummers.”
you look down, rubbing your hand over your belly. “guess they didn't expect me to be home because none of my heels fit anymore and even the maternity dresses make me look like a whale.” you mean it as a joke, but it has tears flowing down your eyes, wishing you would have just sucked up your insecurities and gone with rafe. you still would have got robbed, but without the trauma of being there during the break in.
“im two minutes, baby. two minutes and you'll be safe in my arms.” rafe tries to keep his voice calm for you, but it's a struggle.
“i… i just wanna be safe.” you mutter the last words of the call, voice breaking as you begin to sob. rafe hears an officer try to calm you, but he knows it won't work, knows the only thing you need is him.
he parks haphazardly behind the police cars, fully blocking the street without a care in the world, not even taking the car keys out as he runs across the yard, sprinting until he reaches you.
“im here.” his arms are finally around your shoulders. “im here.”
you continue to sob, only lessened by pressing your face into rafes chest as he cradles you, even managing to pull you onto his lap despite your protruding baby bump.
“ive got you, princess.” rafe kisses the top of your head, continuing his reassuring words, the police officers giving you some space, but not retreating any farther than the steps leading onto the porch.
“oh my god, i was so scared.” you whine out, managing to blink back your tears enough to look at rafe.
“im so sorry baby.” rafe sighs. “i should have been here.”
“no.” you shake your head. “you had to go to midsummers. it's okay.”
“as soon as you said you weren't coming, i should have canceled it. should have never left my pregnant wife at home alone. im the worst fucking husband.” rafe knows his words aren't comforting, but he needs to make sure you know that he is the one to blame for what happened.
“what?” you press your fingers against rafes cheeks. “you couldn't have known, baby.”
“i still should have been here.” rafe leans in, taking your mouth in a strong kiss. “i love you, baby.”
“oh my god, you're not gonna leave my side for the next year, are you?” you let out a tiny laugh, the noise relieving rafe, loosening some of the tension in his chest.
“definitely not, my love.” rafe pulls you closer.
“thank you for coming so quickly.” you whisper, letting your head rest against rafes chest. “i really am okay. just freaked out.”
“don't worry, baby.” rafes voice suddenly changes tone. “the second they try to sell any of your jewelry, ill find them. they won't make it far at all. ill make sure they can never hurt you or anyone else ever again.”
you know you should tell rafe to let the police handle it, to not get personally involved in clearly dangerous men, but any man who lays their hands on a pregnant woman doesn't deserve to breathe, let alone only be punished to a few months in jail like what would no doubtabley happen if you went the legal way.
“im surprised you haven't called barry already.” you laugh softly, knowing he will be just as pissed as rafe. you came into their life and helped expand the business, turning them from lowly dealers to something bigger, better. still dealing, of course, but offering protection and other services as well.
“figure id let the police leave first.” rafe rubs your back, glad that you're slowly getting back to your jokey and sharp witted self. “before he insisted on being your personal armed guard until those guys are put in the ground.”
“yeah, once baby girl pops, im going to have to ask him to teach me to shoot. just in case anything like this happens again.” you feel bad that you relied so heavily on rafes protection, that you let yourself slack to the point where an emergency arose and you hid in the closet instead of grabbing a glock.
“hey, what about me?” rafe whines, knowing he'd never let another man teach you how to shoot, not even your joint business partner barry.
“fine.” you joke, sighing and sliding off rafes lap. “you better go talk to the police about what else might be missing. i wouldn't let them snoop around.”
you don't keep anything illicit in your house, but just in case you weren't about to give the law open access to your home.
“in a minute.” rafe keeps his arms around you, not willing to let you move too far from his hold. “need to just keep my wife in my arms for a few minutes longer.”
you look out onto the sky, the stars glimmering in the darkness of light, allowing yourself to take a full, deep breath, at peace held in your husband's arms.
taglist: @winterrrnight @bejeweledreverie @drewstarkeyslut @forstarkey @f4ll-for-you @dilvcv @drudyslut @jjmaybankswifes-blog @rafescokenostril @jjsmarijuana @seeingstarks @angelofcigs @cece45450 @babygorewhore @vanessa-rafesgirl @michelleisheres-blog @outerbankspov @drewstarkeyswifehoe @cutielando @kamninaries @buckyswhxre @rafeinterlude @bellbottombaby @deeaardiary @rubixgsworld @wearemadeofstardust0 @leighbronk @starkeysheart @pradabambie @tobesolovelysstuff @alexiskirkland @rafestar @brioffthegrid
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star-sim · 9 months
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"nooo! she's taken!" ☆ enha maknaes
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☆ non-idol! bf! enhypen maknaes x celebrity! fem! reader ☆ summary: you are a very well-loved celebrity, and your relationship is finally revealed to the public. ☆ genre: fluff, another poor attempt at humor, it's very silly ☆ warning(s)? none! lmk if you'd like to see this w the hyungs! hyung ver.
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sunoo ☆
so youre a famous actress
you have your official instagram account
and then your personal one, that you only allow family and personal friends to follow
sunoo, your bf, also has an account on instagram
since most of you friends and family know him, it's not uncommon for him to take your phone and post on your personal account
one of those "hai guys i stole her phone 🤭"
all in good fun
so one night, you and sunoo and cuddling
it was one of those vibey nights
the lights were dim, candles lighting up the room with their orangey hue, light music playing in the background
laying on you and sunoo's shared bed, his face buried into the crook of his neck while you run your fingers through his hair
its honestly so soft and warm and comfy :]
the two of you aren't really talking to each other, just basking in each other's presence
and eventually you begin to doze off
at first sunoo was like "baaaaabee!! why did you stop touching my hair"
but then he realized you were asleep
so after givng your cheek a soft peck, and tucking you into the soft blankets
sunoo physically goes >:]
he takes your phone and decides that he's going to spam your personal account
because tbh he does this a lot and it's funny for everyone involved
sunoo takes very silly pictures of you and him
pictures of you sleeping, ones at very silly angles (ik he takes the most FOUL 0.5s)
on your story he posts them with also very ridiculous captions
theres one of you sleeping with the caption "mimimumuimuiu"
another fisheye lens one of sunoo with the caption "hai i stole [name]'s phone 😈"
but he also posts some sweet ones
like one where you're dozing off in his arms w the caption "she's so cute"
sunoo gets mushy at some point
like his captions go from funny to "im so happy that i get to call myself [name]'s boyfriend, i feel so lucky to be with such a beautiful and talented woman"
that's great!
really!
that's wonderful!
but.
there's just one problem
one
teeeeeeensy
weeeeeeeeeensy
problem
he was using the wrong account.
he was posting all this on your official, business, 7.8 million follower, instagram account.
and not your personal account.
!!!!!
😱😱😱
he doesn't notice until 20 minutes later his phone blows up with articles and text messages
and when he notices
sunoos like OH SHIT
he shakes you awake
and poor boy is so apologetic :(
"baby i'm so sorry i didn't mean to out our relationship like that i should have been more careful-"
but when he explains it to you
you kinda just laugh
and go back to sleep
HELP
sunoo deletes the stories but people already screenshotted them
yeah... so this blows up
i feel like they would become memes
like the ones of you sleeping become reaction memes or even worse part of those tiktok meme slides LMAOAOAO
a lot of people think it's adorable
and you do too
but sunoo is so embarrassed
poor boy
he was writing out entire think pieces on your instagram story oml
OH MY GOD I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING TERRIBLE
there's definitely articles that come out about this
and yk how on articles theres a title page with images
one of the images is of you ofc
all these news outlets use your super professional HD MODEL pictures of you
like ones where youre a goddamn SMOKE SHOW, the "who is she?" ones, the ZOOWEE MAMA ones...
and then they use one of the foul images that sunoo takes of himself that are like 3 pixels
like the 0.5 lens ones 😭
nevertheless, there is a happy ending
everyone thinks its so sweet
including you
and when people bring it up on interviews you're able to just laugh about it
<3
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jungwon ☆
we joke abt jay and sunghoon and sunoo having mad side eyes
but i think we forget the FATHER of INSANE SIDE EYES
YANG JUNGWON HIMSELF
you're a singer/artist
and you just released a new EP!
on tiktok, you're making promotional videos to promote your new songs
looking like a cutie, popping off, as you always do!
anyways in many of them
you're in front of a glass door
or a mirror
so as youre being an absolute cutie promoting your song, in the background in the reflection you can see jungwon making faces
NOT BECAUSE HE'S MAKING FACES AT YOU
but bc sometimes there's ppl walking by and being judgy
jungwon is giving them mad stink eyes and it's caught in the reflection of your videos
i don't think a lot of ppl notice it until someone points it out
and when they do
theyre like
WHO TF IS THAT 😭
ppl are making tiktoks simply zooming into his face LMAOAOAO
and then a few days later
the paparazzi released pictures of you walking with jungwon, holding hands and on a date
and when ppl see it
theyre like
hmm...
that guy looks a lot like the guy in the reflection...
and then the dots connect
like sunoo, i think jungwon is embarrassed
everytime someone brings it up jungwon hides his face in your neck
and he wears that cute little bashful grin
but honestly it's cute
so just hug him and kiss his lil cheeks and he'll be okay
it kinda becomes viral on tiktok
so you make a few video stitches about it
you stitched the og video that pointed out jungwon's face in the background
your stitch was just a video of jungwon being embarrassed and freaking out
like bro was on the floor, hands in his hair
jungwon was in the trenches sorry 😭
there's another stitch where jungwon explains himself
he's dressed in a suit and tie and speaking so formally like he was making an apology video or something
"i would like to address a recent clip of me making inappropriate facial expressions-"
"babe you don't need to be so formal, it's a tiktok"
"you shant say that, i must do this for this is my will"
BRO WAS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE ☠️☠️☠️
#freejungwon
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riki ☆
youre an actress that's very popular
except some ppl hate you bc they think hating popular people makes them interesting *eye roll*
safe to say.... riki is your NUMBER ONE DEFENDER
like he is the ring leader to all of those [name] stan twt group chats
he's the one leading those discord raids on your hate groups OH MY GOD 😭
he has multiple accounts and he fights every person that dares tarnish your name
twitter is his battlefield and the keyboard is his sword
anyways one day riki is so deep into an internet fight that he GETS DOXXED 😭😭
like it wasn't even graceful
i think he'd make fun of one of your haters
and the hater goes "wanna see something funny? :)"
and BOOM
ADDRESS
IP ADDRESS
FULL NAME
PERSONAL EMAIL
PHONE NUMBER
dont actually dox people guys its not funny
when riki gets doxxed they get his full name right
and the hater, his assailent, and their little posse start searching his name on social media to further dox him
and BOOM #2
THEY FIND HIS INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT
now riki isn't stupid
so his ig acc is private
however.....
the profile picture of his acc is a selfie of you and him kissing
they also did research on him and found out that you and him went to the same high school...
in fact they found miscellaneous pictures posted online of you and him a few years back... holding hands n shit....
OH
SHIT
this goes viral over night
like
its so bad that even news headlines are covering it
"TWITTER USER @[NAME]LUVER1209, HOT ACTRESS [NAME]'S MOST NOTORIOUS INTERNET DEFENDER, IS REVEALED TO BE HER BOYFRIEND 😱😱😱"
i feel like the public's reaction to this would be really light-hearted
like i think mst ppl would be cheering riki on
"he's so real"
"oh my god i think i was mutuals with @[name]luver1209"
"this is what true love looks like"
you have super loyal fans and riki's mutuals so they support you too
except i do think theyd be in shambles, but in good fun
"i just found out [name] has a bf im going to flush myself down a toilet"
"i can't believe she chose @[name]luver1209 when his fancams are so shit... THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!'
"i've been here waiting in line for three years and this random @[name]luver1209 swoops in and takes my woman..."
riki's stan account gains a lot of followers
and so with your permission
he posts a selfie of you and him
probably with a cheeky caption like "KISS MY ASS!!!!"
i feel like people go back and watch old talk show interviews and stuff
and if you zoom in
you'll see riki in the front rows cheering the loudest 😭
bro is everywhere
in the future there's def a moment where like
you're at a live talk show
and the host asks you about the fiasco
and you can literally just point to him in the audience like
"yeah my boyfriend's right there-- hi baby!"
and riki from the audience, behind his phone that he's using to record you like its a fancam, is like "hi baby!" back
i dont think the media even calls him riki, he's stuck as @[name]luver1209 forever
not that he minds
😭😭😭
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hyung ver.
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beesmygod · 1 year
Text
we can all look back on and laugh at this when im wrong, but it seems like social media in its current incarnation is dying an undignified and overdue death. it turns out throwing all of humanity into one room and expecting everyone to develop a single ethos was beyond insane conceptually and the artists who built their following on social media are probably in a tail spin right now. people jumping to bluesky are insane lol. did you forget jack dorsey is the idiot who got us into this mess in the first place. why would you choose to subject yourself to this shit again. for what purpose?
the stock answer i got was that "for discoverability/audience" and if that's true thats a problem. i've been hollerin about this to anyone who would listen prior to this but the customer base of twitter (and all social media) is its advertisers. they have not been shy from the start about that fact because its the only way they generate income, as far as i know. YOU (the user) are the product. YOU (still the user) are also what draws people to the site. there is not a social media website on earth that has figured out that making a good website (which would require hiring and paying for quality labor over an extended period of time) is more likely to result in economic success than exclusively courting the businesses whose interest is in making the website worse to use with ads. at no point were our interests ever a factor.
in fact, imo, the number of people following you is not an accurate representational sample of your audience. the reasonable assumption you should make is that the vast majority of numbers involved with any website (esp those with a vested interest in showing off big numbers to VC investors or advertising execs) are inflated or just outright fake. the numbers exist solely to drive you insane and make awful people happy. the numbers cause you and everyone around you to start spontaneously spawning myths about a beast called "the algorithm" that possesses the incredible traits of being both something you can game for success or blame for your failures. it coerces you into enacting out nonsense superstitions to try to counteract or appease it in the hopes of, let's be honest, breaking it big and going viral. this way, you, the creator, do not have to do the hard work of building up a rapport with an audience. none of this goes anything but adds more numbers for the ceos to look at and nod approvingly or disapprovingly at.
the people running the world today are, without exaggeration, cartoon villains. they are deeply stupid, devoid of empathy, and open about their intent to do deeply evil acts in order to further their economic interests. trying to derive some kind of financial benefit from the creations of these unapologetic losers was always bound to be a wasted effort. the best thing i can say about twitter, a website i was banned from countless times and returned to out of stubborn desire, was that i got to make some great jokes with friends and cause some chaos lol. letting people know i have a web comic was always a secondary function once the realization of what social media was turning out to be set in like 7 years ago. any artist who insists that you have to do this or that on this or that social media site is trying to drag you down into the quagmire of online numbers poisoning.
run away!!! children heed my advice!!! the joy of creation does not lie on a path that encourages you to cater to the lowest common denominators while casting your net. just fucking have fun with it. if its not fun then it wont even be fun to do financially anyway. and isnt that, like. the point.
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yuyu1024 · 2 months
Text
Fake Dating
Pairings: Mingyu x Y/N
Genre/tags: non idol au, university couple
Warning: 🔞 fluff, suggestive but not purely smut, cursing, pet names, jealousy, mention of bullying but not extreme
~~~ [lmk if i miss anything]
Words: 2.4k
Disclaimer:
- this story is just made up
- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊
A/N: written this while drinking my 3rd cup of coffee. Thats why it must be all over the place and does not make sense and feels a bit rushed... but yeah. 💀 im fine lol.
Anyways... busy days ahead.
Stay safe.
-----------------------------------------------------
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"Hold my hand..." he utters the second you jump out of his SUV's front passenger seat.
"What?" You grunt as you put your backpack on you.
"Just.... hold... my... hand..." he hiss through his teeth whilst smiling.
You roll your eyes, "Fine." And then intertwined your fingers with his.
"Next time... when I tell you to do something... just do it okay?" He says trying to sound sweet.
You got it now. His ex is probably within the perimeter of the parking lot that's why he asked you to hold his hand.
"Okay... I will listen next time..." you force a sweet smile and then tip toe to pinch him on his cheek as a gesture of trying to act like you find him cute but not really.
"Thank you."
You two are over acting everything but you know from outside perspective, it is believable. Coz you even got your friends fooled. None of them know that between you and Mingyu, everything is just fake. You are not actually dating. He just asked for your help.
Why you? You have no fucking idea.
"How long are we going to do this?" You ask as you two walk along the sidewalk.
"Until I get the reaction I need from her..."
"And what reaction is that?"
He snorts a proud and yet annoyingly laugh. "Beg."
"Beg?" You stop walking. "This thing will end when she begs for you to take her back?"
"Yeah."
You roll your eyes again and let go of his hand. "That is silly..."
"What the fuck does that mean?"
"Well... I know Selena." You sigh, "She was my schoolmate since highschool... and she never begs men. It's always the other way around."
"Wow. Don't look down at me like that! Am I not attractive enough to make her beg and regret she broke up with me?"
You scan him from head to toe. "You are not bad... I must say... you are the very first good looking guy I actually approve by looks....that Selena dated."
"Really?" He arches a brow.
"However.... given her history." You pull out your phone from your pocket. "Goodluck." You mumble as you go on and scroll over texts on your phone. "Plus... you using me... is a wrong move... I am not a competition or whatsoever for her."
"If that's what you think... why did you agree with me? Doing this?"
"I was... desperate... like you. I needed saving that day too... so..." you trail off, your eyes busy with your phone still.
Yeah. That day when Mingyu pulled you from the bleachers, you needed that save. You were getting bullied by the mean girls from your class. Well, just because you caught their eyes that day.
Anyways, that afternoon during Mingyu's practice, you were there being tormented by those girls. They were acting like they were your friends but they were pinching and pulling your hair just to make you feel uncomfortable. And then suddenly, Mingyu spots you from the distance.
He called you by your name, asks you about something about going home with him and then chatted about random stuff. You were so fucking confuse but you went with his acting. At first you thought he saw you getting bullied so he helped you. But them after the whole quick kdrama acting, he explained everything to you.
That's it.
"Hey..." Mingyu steals your phone from your hand. "Stop using your phone when we're talking... you know its rude if you are talking to someone and you are not even paying attention."
You try to take it back but you fail. He is taller than you. "I am listening... and answering.."
"No..." he locks your phone and puts it in his bag. "Why are you so addicted with your phone?"
"I'm not! I was just replying to someone..."
"Who?"
"None of your business... babe..." you stick your tongue out and dig your phone out of his gym bag. "Anyways... goodluck with practice... just message me if we need to do something or your giving me a ride home or not."
He frowns. "Of course, I will drive you home."
You smile. "Okay then... thank you. See you!" You wink and left
****
Days had passed. Nights had gone by so quick. It has been an hectic few weeks for you. With all of the reviewing you have been doing preparing for the exams, on top of trying to survive each classes. You are dead inside now basically.
"I'm so tired." You sigh as you lay your head on your book and unplug your phone from charging. "It has been four months already?" You mumble as you scroll over you calendar for your schedules and see the monthsary reminder that Mingyu had set for every 26th of the month. "We lasted this long...?"
You thought that this fake dating will be over after 3 weeks. 2 months tops if Mingyu wanted to be serious with the 'making selena jealous and beg' agenda. But four months? That's a record breaker. Well atleast to your judgement of him.
It's not that you are getting tired of this fake dating shit. It's just... emotionally draining you in somewhat way.
He makes your heart confuse every now and then. And you can't do anything about it. That big giant puppy is a good-looking, athletic and charming dude. His attitude in life and personality is not bad either. He is funny and smart too. So... he is a good dream boyfriend material.
It's not a shocker that Selena liked him. Nor the rest of his fanclub. Mingyu is....hot. And you are not blind nor heartless.
However since you know your place in this modern world, your level in the who's hot and who's not. You are NOT a good match for him. You are just existing now in his world because he have a mission. His ex. So.. catching feelings is not in your to do list.
Yeah you can always ask him to end the deal. He said it himself; that you have the freedom too. BUT, besides being the hot guy in your life. Mingyu had been a friend too...(which you lack in your life sadly) so you are not sure if you are willing to let go a decent friend if you end whatever relationship you have with him.
*buzz*
🐶: where are you?
💖: why?
🐶: wdym why? Don't tell me you forgot?
💖: forgot what?
💖: just tell me
💖: im busy.
It took three minutes before he replies again
🐶: my mother's party is tonight.
"Fuck!" You hiss as you scramble to get all your things in your bag
You got a few sshh and be quiet from the other students studying in the library.
"Sorry..." you mouth as you hurry your way out
🐶: just tell me where the fuck are you and im going to pick you up.
You were trying to reply as you run out of the building but then the sound of the pouring rain made you gasp.
"Shit!"
You are dumbfounded. You don't know what to do now. You have no umbrella and you need to get home and get dress for his mom's birthday party.
*phone buzzes*
"Where are you?" He says as soon as you answered the call
"Library building. Outside..." you exhale your frustration. You scan the whole empty space in front of you. No one is running. No human is in sight. "How can I go? I don't have any change of clothes with me... maybe... I can just--"
"Found you."
You look straight up and see his pick up truck.
He rolls down the window of the passenger seat. "Get in!" He yells
"Crap!" You put your phone in your leather bag and then raise your jacket on top of your head before running like crazy down the steps.
The moment you got in, he sees your legs, part of your skirt and shirt are wet, "I've been calling you..."
"Sorry... my phone died and I just charged it."
His forehead is wrinkled. He does not look like he is in the mood.
"Figured." He then opens the zip of your bag and takes your phone so he can plug it to his car. "Let's hurry home so we can both change..."
"But I don't have--" you pause as you see how drenched he is. "Why are you so soaked?" You take off your jacket and put it around him.
He chuckles. "Thanks?" He finds it funny that you give him your small as jacket to a big guy like him.
"Just take it... you're cold."
"So are you..." he says
"I'm fine." Then you scan the back seat of his car, checking if he have a spare shirt somewhere.
"What are you looking for?" He glances at you when he sees you reaching for something while he's driving. "Hey!" He holds on to you when you almost slipped.
"Got it!" You grunt. "I found you a--"
Your cheeks suddenly burns like hell. No, you did not randomly got sick or what. You're just caught off guard when you straighten up your position and felt... and saw that his hand is on your thigh.
Mingyu is fucking holding your thigh!
"Is that a shirt of mine?" He asks, his eyes is on the road.
"Uhmm..." you answer, "uhuh."
"How did you know I have clean a shirt back there?" He's still not moving his hand off you.
"Well..." you look outside the window to your side, pretending to not notice it. "I remembered you said you always bring extra... especially during practice."
He hums his answer. "You do listen when I talk..."
"Whatever."
You became silent and stiff. Even though eventually he removed his hand because he is driving. He needs his hands.
But the warmth that his hand left on your skin lingers. It burns. And it felt like your skin misses the touch.
*phone buzzes*
You bend over to unplug your phone and see who texted you. But then suddenly, Mingyu swerves his car to park giving you a whiplash and dropping your phone on the floor.
"What the fuck? Why are you so aggressive parking your--"
It was a blurr. You don't know what caused it nor what happened but Mingyu just parked his car, unbuckle his seatbelt and lunges at you. He, out of the blue, just started kissing you.
"Mingyu!" Your voice is small and weak. You're panting. "W-what the hell...?"
His eyes are just on you, scanning your face. Most particularly your bruised lips.
"I don't want you to reply to him anymore..." he says
"W-what?"
"I know your still texting your ex..." he cups your face with his one hand. "And I don't like it." He leans close again and kisses you more. Sucking your lower lip and tongue.
This is so fucking wrong but you can't get a grip of yourself to stop kissing back. It feels so fucking good. Your body was cold earlier but now, it's not.
"You are kissing me... because of that? You hate my ex?" You ask as your lips separates
"Don't be dumb. Of course that's not the only reason..." His hand slides back to your thights and it earned him a sensual reaction that made him smile in pure joy. "You know... I like it when you blush..." he says before going in for another kiss.
Everything that's happening is out og the blue. How did you both got in this situation? No clue. Does he like you? Is he just horny? What?
"W-wait..." your back is already leaning on the door whilst you still have your seatbelt on. "I don't think... this is right."
"Hmmm..."
"I think we should--"
Before finishing your sentence, Mingyu unbuckles your seatbelt and pushed your seat back so it lowers. You yelp as it goes down, flat.
"Move to the back." He orders
"What?" You look at him and the backseat.
"Crawl..."
"W-why?"
"Y/N... you know what I mean... go... please?"
You heart is beating fast. Its a mixed of excitement and fear of what if you guys get caught. Yes his car is tinted but...
He totally stops the car engine (to be safe) and then starts pulling his shirt off
"What are you doing?" You gasp
He smiles, "why are you asking questions that's already obvious?" He is big but he moved from the driver's seat to the backseat beside you.
"Well..." you hug your legs as you watch him move
"Don't tell me... you're a shy type person when it comes to fucking?" He is smirking.
"I'm... not....it's just..."
"Just what?" He ask while removing his bracelet and wrist watch
"Why are we doing this?" You question
He shrugs. "Because... I like you."
"You like me?" You are taken aback. "Seriously?" And then laugh. "You're funny..."
"Who said I'm joking?" He grabs both your ankles, spread your legs and place them on his side. He is hovering you now.
"But... selena..." you are breatheless as you see him basically on top of you now.
"The deal was only for a month...right?"
You nod
"It didn't worked. So... I moved on..."
"The fuck? So why do we still do this dating shit?"
"Because... I like you."
"What? I'm confused."
"Selena broke up with me... coz I started liking someone else..."
"What?! Who?"
Mingyu lowers down his face and starts kissing you on your neck, just below your ear. "Obviously... its you..."
He continues to nibble your neck until he felt your hips react with his touches.
"Your...y-your making this shit up... just to... just to fuck me..." you are moaning the words out now.
"If I just want to fuck you... I could just ask you right there and then in the field..." he explains "I'm sorry I made this fake dating shit up... but... I know you'll not try to date me if I didn't do it... I know you don't like me before... so..."
You just stare at him and try to absorb whatever he's saying
"Why.... why do you like me?"
"I don't know.. I just did..." he pushes the hair off your face. "I think you don't remember... but we've been to same classes a few times before... you were so quiet and always isolated that you don't notice me when I try to reach out..." he snorts a small smile. "I can explain the whole story in detail later if you want but..."
"But what?"
"I'm fucking horny right now... and I don't think I can wait anymore..."
Your eyes widens before laughing out loud. Mingyu is so real and does not deny what he needs.
"Okay then....." you try to stop laughing. "Let's do it quick before anyone sees us plus your mom is waiting..."
"Fuck yeah."
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sombrashe · 5 months
Note
hii!
can you pretty please write something for Norm MacLean x reader?
ty, and i love your blog!
content fluff, just so much fluff and a little angst if you squint, childhood friends to lovers, reader is a breeder and its their wedding day, gn!reader, chubby!reader
note(s) hiiiiii :3 im so happy you like my blog!! i hope you enjoy this little but of fluff | i didnt know how to end it so it might seem a little abrupt
"Norm?"
Your voice bounces off the concrete walls and back into your ears. Your heels click with every step, your shoes are nice and shiny for the occasion. He wasn't home, at Chet's, or in the fusion room. A long shared hiding spot. You frown as you turn down yet another hallway. A sea of copy-pasted doors muddle together in your eyes as you huff. Maintaining your peppy smile you grip the bouquet tighter. When you noticed Lucy, but no Norm to accompany her you had to pause everything. A much disagreed decision which led to Overseer MacLain chastising you for your decision. It wasn't a good idea to make Vault 31 wait but you couldn't care less.
"Norman."
Your voice grows in pitch as you backtrack out of the hallway and into an identical one. One furthest from your wedding and who do you find sitting with his back to you? Cleaning the connection line of the vault floor.
"Oh! Norm, there you are."
He doesn't turn back and simply gives you a quick hand raise and a simple, "Busy. Be done soon."
You give a soft giggle and crouch down behind him.
"Norman MacLean. It's rude to ignore the person being married. Especially on their wedding day."
He finally turns at that. Almost as if he just realized who was talking to him. Your smile is unrelenting a stark contrast to the stony expression he gives you in return.
"Well, are you coming?"
You stand and extend your hand only to frown when he simply glances at your palm.
"What's wrong?"
You start to worry as he takes his time replying. You never felt this before, the feeling of your stomach becoming a giant knot. Like all your intestines became worms and got themselves tangled in each other. You did not like this feeling.
"You're making my stomach hurt, Norm. What's going on? You said you would be there when I met my partner."
"I got assigned cleaning duty."
You scoff and roll your eyes, a smile gracing your lips again as if you solved one of the riddles in the vault newspaper.
"It's my wedding day. I'm sure Hank would understand. You're my best friend after all, he would want you to be there with me."
Hands on your hips you can't help but notice as your cheeks start to sting with all this frowning and smiling.
"Best friend. Yeah, okay."
He repeated you again.
"Norman, what's going on? Are you sick?"
Bending over at the waist you place the cool back of your hand to his warm forehead and chew on your bottom lip. He feels fine. So why is he acting like this?
"I'm fine. It's nothing."
He swats your hand away. Using his hands he pushes himself to stand.
"Let's just go."
"No. Not until you tell me what's going on. Why you're acting like this. You've never repeated me twice. You only do that when you're upset. Three times and I would have to call security."
You try to give him a smile and laugh, but he just pushes past you. Hurrying you catch up to him as he goes to turn the corner out of the hallway. Reaching out you're able to grab ahold of his suit before he makes it.
"I don't want you to get married."
His words are rushed and he refuses to look at you. You give a small laugh hoping he was joking. You didn't go through all this... all this moving on just for him to confuse you.
"Norm, you said you were excited when I told you I was chosen."
"I lied."
I lied echoes throughout the corridor. Your grip tightens on his suit as you soak in his words.
"You told me-."
"I lied. About everything. It wasn't just practicing for me. None of it was practice. You need this, I know. Now you know so you can move on. What are you hoping they look like?"
He gives you a false smile and it looks out of place especially with you mimicking his stony expression from before. Dropping your hand you furrow your eyebrows and slam the palm of your hand into his chest.
"You... jerk! All this time I thought you wanted to be just friends. Thought you regretted everything. Fudge, Norm. Why didn't you tell me? I would have never gone to the council and convinced them to let me get married."
He gives you a genuine smile and you want to hit him again. Maybe yell at him some more until he's cupping your cheeks. His eyes are intense as they stare into yours.
"I know how important fulfilling your job is, I would never ruin that for you. I thought it would be easier if I didn't show up."
"That's stupid. You're more important to me than any job. I would be just as fulfilled and happy scrubbing floors."
His eyes search yours. His fingertips press into the soft flesh of your cheeks. You can tell he wants to lean in closer. Do as you always did ever since you were children. You don't give him the chance to back away. Not again. Leaning forward you rest your forehead against his, nose smushes against each other making it difficult to breathe. As if you could breathe clearly given the circumstances.
He takes the initiative this time and closes the minuscule gap between your lips. Years as the Overseers son gave him access to anything he ever wanted and you can tell he uses it to take care of himself.
"Strawberry?"
"They figured out how to make this stick that makes your lips soft and they gave me one to try."
You giggle and kiss his soft sweet lips again and again. Breaking away to smack your lips covered in the foreign flavor. After a good thirty minutes, you hear your name being called from a dot down the hallway.
"Lucy." You whisper as your heart starts to rise and you fear you might throw it up.
Taking your hand he squeezes it tightly before letting it fall beside the fabric of your wedding gear.
"I don't want to get married anymore, Norm. What do I do?"
"We explain to Lucy and see what she has to say. She's the older sister for a reason."
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