#I'm trying to hold onto the good things and trying to remember that i matter and mean smth but it's getting so so hard to believe it

[starrystevie]

steve's desperate, okay?

he's officially running late for his first date with linda because he couldn't find his car keys and the shirt he wanted to wear just wasn't working so he had to grab something out of his hamper and throw it on blindly which then messed up his hair and he almost forgot to brush his teeth again but remembered as he opened the front door and-

he only realizes he forgot to put on cologne once he makes it halfway to her house and smells himself. the shirt from the hamper smells stale, not bad, just stale. and steve in his normal, non-rushed state wouldn't have noticed because his trusty calvin klein would have covered it up but today is apparently not a day for things to go right.

with a sigh of frustration, steve pulls into the hook's drugstore a little too quickly and it makes his stomach lurch the tiniest bit before sliding into an open parking sport at the front door. he rushes in, pushing the door open with too much force and books it to the fragrance aisle.

"this is so fucking stupid," he mutters to himself, unable to be heard by any surrounding shoppers over the annoyingly loud jingle playing through the speakers.

steve skids to halt in front of the cologne section, crouching down and scanning quickly over the tester bottles for obsession. once he spots the amber bottle, he yanks it towards himself, spraying as much as he can onto his chest given the awkward angle he's at. as he stands back up, steve pulls his shirt collar up towards his nose and the ball of nerves in his stomach loosens at the familiar smell. he may be late but he feels like he's back in the game.

checking his watch, he sees just how late he is and makes a beeline for the door, nearly running into an older lady with far too many rolls of toilet paper in her tiny arms. as he dodges around her and extends his arm to push open the door, he hears a loud voice over the intercom.

"you're not going to buy anything after stealing cologne?"

steve stops, freezes where he is and frantically turns his head around to spot the cashier grinning at him. he has long hair and a bright red hook's drugstore vest over a denim vest which doesn't look very comfortable. he has chains in his jeans and handcuffs holding his belt closed and a smirk that is trying to kill him and oh-

"wait, stealing cologne?" steve shakes himself back into existence as the old lady pushes by him without dropping a single roll on the way back to her car. "you're going to call me putting on a few sprays stealing?"

the cashier's smile just gets bigger, like a cat hunting down a canary. steve's never felt like a canary before but can't deny that it's an exciting feeling.

"well, on a good day i wouldn't. but i'm bored and you didn't buy a single thing so technically, yes. you're stealing, pretty boy."

steve fights the urge to roll his eyes and put his hands on his hips, so instead he crosses them over his chest, cologne wafting up from the movement and reminding him that he doesn't have time for this no matter how cute the cashier may be.

he makes his way over to the counter, grabs a pack of gum and slams it on the counter. without breaking eye contact with eddie, as his nametag suggests, he throws him a salty smile of his own and pulls his wallet out from his back pocket.

eddie's eyes are a deep brown with a glimmer of something behind them and his hands are covered in rings making his fingers look long and strong. the jeans he has on are ripped on one of the the thighs, showing a hint of a tattoo to match the ones crawling up his arms. steve's no stranger to thinking men are attractive but this guy? he's on a new level. his heart thumps painfully in his chest when eddie's grin grows larger as he watches steve give him a once over. it thumps even harder when eddie gives him a once over of his own.

the clock above the register shows that he's officially 20 minutes late to picking up... laura? lisa?

no, linda. damnit.

eddie looks down at the gum and then back up at steve, quirking up an eyebrow. "i hardly think this monetarily equates to a bottle of cologne but-"

"oh come on!" steve huffs. eddie laughs and it's clear and bright, ringing off the cinderblock walls louder than the annoying jingle that's still playing. whatever fight steve may have had left in him drains away at the sound and suddenly he isn't thinking about the clock anymore. he feels his shoulders fall down to a more relaxed state, feels himself shift his weight on his feet to look more natural than ready to run at a moments notice.

"just kidding, man." eddie rings up the gum quickly and hands it back to steve. "sorry, you looked like you were in a rush. i shouldn't have created a scene just because i'm bored."

steve chuckles. "i'm already supremely late for my date so what's another five minutes. especially if it gets me..." he looks at the gum packet to look at what he even picked up in the first place. "... spearmint freshen-up gum."

"well there you go," eddie says, grin smaller than before, "a perfect thing to get for a date. everyone likes their date to be minty fresh for that first kiss."

it strikes somewhere in steve that he isn't expecting. the beemer is still out in the parking lot running so he didn't have to waste time, his watch on his wrist feels heavy, the scent of obsession overpowering. but he can't make himself move. he wants to stay and talk to eddie, wants to learn about what makes him tick.

"can i borrow your phone?" steve asks. eddie's eyebrows furrow but he reaches for the store phone and places the console on top of the counter.

"for what?"

steve look through his wallet, finding the piece of paper with linda's number on it. holding the receiver between his shoulder and ear, he dials in her number and holds his pointer finger up at eddie, signaling that he'll need a second. steve then brings the finger to his lips and shushes with his cheek pulling up in a smirk. eddie's eyes zero in on the motion and it feels like steve's gone from being the canary back to the cat.

"linda? hey it's steve."

he watches as eddie mouths steve back at him and then nods to himself when he gets the confirmation that it is indeed his name. steve throws him a wink for good measure.

"i know i'm late and i'm really really sorry to cancel last minute but-. oh. yeah, sure. have a good time. okay bye li-."

on the other end of the line, linda slams down the phone without waiting for steve to finish talking and it makes him wince with how loud it is in his ear. he gives eddie a sheepish smile, all toothy and guilt-ridden, and gently puts the receiver back down.

"what was that?" eddie asks with a disbelieving look on his face. steve shrugs.

"she got tired of waiting so she already had another guy lined up to come pick her up."

eddie sucks in air through his teeth and mimes getting shot in the heart. it has steve laughing as he falls over on the counter, hair covering his face. he turns his head to peer up at steve through the curtain of curls, the one brown eye that's visible twinkling in the harsh overhead light.

"was it true love? are you just absolutely heartbroken?"

steve thinks about it for less than a second. watches how eddie curls back up one vertebrae at a time before placing his elbows on the counter and leaning over. watches how eddie's eyes flit between his own and his lips. watches how he focuses on the latter for a little while too long.

"why would i be heartbroken," steve starts. he's being too forward, too brash, but with eddie looking at him that way, he knows he can be. "when you'll probably be on break soon and can make it up to me? you know, for making me even more late and all."

eddie's grin grows wide again. "oh really?"

steve shrugs once more with a playful look of consideration on his face, resting on his elbows to match eddie on the counter. "yes, really. this is your payback for being bored and taking it out on me."

it's later when eddie's on break and steve hasn't left the drugstore in over an hour and they're sitting in his car with bowie playing through the speakers that eddie looks up at him with a look steve knows well.

"you do smell really good, y'know." his voice is softer than steve's heard it all day.

"so are you glad i came in to steal cologne?" steve leans closer over the center console to get into eddie's personal space. there's a hand curling over his bicep and pulling him even closer, their faces only centimeters apart.

"i guess i'll let it slide this time, thief."

and when they kiss for the first time, it tastes like the freshen-up gum they both had been nonstop chewing ever since steve paid for it.

[angelltheninth]

Things Tokyo Rev Men Enjoy

Pairing: Takemichi Hanagaki, Manjiro Sano, Ken Ryuuguuji, Takashi Mitsuya, Kazutora Hanemiya, Baji Keisuke, Shinichirou Sano, Chifuyu Matsuno, Rindou Haitani, Tetta Kisaki x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smut, established relationship, creampie, praise, angry sex, cock riding, risk of getting caught, marking, fucking in front of others, mirror sex, overstimulation

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters

A/N: I got a friend to watch this so I've been rewatching along with him.

Takemichi trebled as you clung onto him, your breath shaky and warm next to his ear. "Only a little bit more Take, you can do it can't you? You've been waiting for a while." You pressed your body against his, felt his thighs flex under yours.

"Anything for you babe- a-anything you want, just... fuck... please tell me how good it feels for you." His lips trailed across your shoulder, fruitlessly trying to put a stop to the whimpers he's making as your pussy keeps trying to drain the cum from his dick. "I'm doing good for you aren't I? You're feeling good cause of me..."

You smiled against his pinkish cheeks and made your inner walls flutter around him, "What do you think? Are you making me feel good? The best I've ever felt? Making me want nothing but your cock?"

"Yes! Yes, yes, ugh, I'll make sure you feel even better soon!" Takemichi kissed and lightly bit at your lips as he finally let himself come, trembling against his bed more than you were against him, almost dizzy from the pleasure he knows he's giving you.

Mikey pulled you against his body, his balls pressed under your ass. "You're not going anywhere yet. I still gotta empty these in your pussy." He rolled his hips upwards even though his cock had nowhere left to go. The friction was enough to stimulate your inner walls, eliciting a small moan from you.

When you tried to pull away from him he tightened his hold. He was enjoying it a little, being able to keep you all to himself however long he wanted.

"Of course you want me here. Who else is gonna keep your cock warm and your balls empty. Am I right, Mikey?" You pressed your body against his, your pussy pulsing around his cock.

"I like having you close." He mumbled against your neck before he pulled you off his cock and then slammed you back down to receive his hot cum.

Draken hates it when you try to hide your pretty face when you have sex. Him seeing your face while he fucks you stupid is his favorite part of it. Well one of his favorite parts. So when you have sex he makes sure that there are no pillows you can use to hide.

Besides a much better use for the pillows is under you so he has a better angle to thrust his cock into you. "Remember what we agreed on babe, no hiding from me. I want to see all of you." Draken teased as he pulled your hands towards him, effectively impaling you on his hard cock.

"But it's embarrassing! The face I'm making right now-" He interrupted you with yet another deep thrust, the angle perfect for fucking you just right.

"Is beautiful. You're beautiful when you make that face. You're making it because I'm making you feel good, I love to see it. Makes me so hard." He insisted , one handmaking from yours and stroking your cheek, "You're beautiful like this, coming on my dick."

Mitsuya never gets tired of you riding his cock. It doesn't matter if you're constantly going up and down on it or if your body is pressed so closely against his that he can feel your tits moving as well. There's no better feeling than your weight on top him while you moan.

"You want me on top again?" You asked with a chuckle as Mistuya moved his hands along your hips and sighed when you took his cock and lined it up with your wet pussy.

"What man wouldn't want you riding and draining him dry? I got all pent up for you." His smug smile turned into a grin when he pushed you down enough to take the tip in. "Can you get is all in one go?"

You quirked your eyebrow at the question. Leaning down you pressed your breasts against his chest, your ass in the air for a few moments and then fully sat on his cock, taking the entire length at once. His cock filled and stretched your pussy, eliciting a deep moan from the both of you.

Kazutora usually let his anger out on opposing gang members, which would then get him and his friends into even more trouble. In turn this would mean he got injured all over again so you suggested he used his energy in a more pleasurable manner.

You weren't ready for how passionate and horny he would get when he had all his anger pent up and the only way for him to let go of it was to fuck it out. "Look at you, getting off on me hurting you." Kazutora brushed his hand along the bruise on your hip left there by his grip.

"I wanted to take your mind off things." You wrapped your legs around him and arched your back into him, your pussy clenching around his cock.

"Those guys deserved it for flirting with you. And you... dressed like that, you were provoking me weren't you? You like me when I'm angry, rough." The bruises he left on you were the kind you would gladly show off.

Baji has no problem with fucking you in front of his gang to make a point. What is that point? That you're off limits to anyone but him. You might make their cocks hard but they're not allowed to touch you, even think about it.

"I had no idea it'd turn you on so much, being on display like this, like a little fucktoy." He whispers close, only for you to hear, so that only he knows how hard your pussy tightens and loosens around his dick. You pull him close to try and hide your flustered face, protecting yourself from the truth of his words.

His hands grab your thighs and push them further apart, letting the other guys see how wet his cock is from pounding your pussy. You hear curses, laughs, snickers around you, but no one even dares to ask to join, valuing their life over pleasure.

You kiss his neck and wrap your legs around him, even though they're shaking. "You should do more than that Baji." You egg him on as your inner walls tighten around him. With a groan he understands what you mean, pulling back and then balls deep back in right as he finishes, shooting thick ropes of cum in you.

Shinichiro spreads your legs open in front of a mirror but doesn't put his dick in before he sees you're wet enough. He enjoys the show of you touching yourself for him, getting ready, touching your clit the exact same way he would. The whole while you feel his hard cock against your back.

"Don't you want to put it in? I can feel you dripping." You look back at him but he only looks at the mirror. More specifically the way your fingers pump in and out of your pussy.

"Babe, you know I want to." He breaths against your ear before kissing behind it. "Look at me as you take my cock." The dark eyes in the mirror never leave yours as you're lifted up by the hips and then pushed down on his throbbing cock.

He uses one hand to guide you, the other one gently on the back of your head to make sure you don't look away. The grip doesn't let up until you feel the soft, full balls pressing against you, then away and then back against you harder.

Chifuyu can't help but het hard when he sees the tiniest evidence of his love on you. He's always covered in various bruises and marks from his fights, he wants you to be covered in marks from his love for you. But you also can't help but want the same for him.

Every time you spot a new bruise your lips latch onto the spot and suck. "Mine." You whisper against his skin while you ride his cock. "I hate that you get so many of these." You run your hands across his back. "I want to be the only one marking you."

"Like I do to you." Teasing you he bites down hard, hard enough to leave a mark just below your boob. "You're mine as I am yours. Nothing will change that."

A little sigh leaves your lips as his tongue licks the mark, hips snapping quickly against yours, making you jump in his lap. He holds you close, feeling every breath you take, every slight movement of your nails against his skin, scratching his back as you come on his dick.

Rindou chuckles against your neck as you try to hurry him up. "Don't tease anymore, we could be caught." He's been taking his sweet time, running his hand down your back, his fingers gathering the wetness between your legs before rubbing it against your clit.

"Look at you," He presses the tip of his cock against your entrance before moving away. "Humping away like a bitch in heat. What's wrong? Scared that everyone's gonna see you for the slut you are?" You brace yourself against the desk as his hips snap forward, sheathing himself fully inside you.

You cover your mouth with your hand, the back of your thighs stinging from the rough thrust. "All at once... oh god..." Your pussy spasms around him.

He grunts, hips immediately starting to piston in and out. "Take it, take it all, take it deep." He is hands brace against your hips as he pounds away at you. "You were made for this and you know it, everyone else will know it too. I'll make sure of it."

Tetta laughs when your body falls limp onto the bed, his arms being there to catch you just in time. "We're not done yet pretty girl." He licks from your tits to your jaw. "I've been waiting all day for this, don't tell me that's it."

"No... just need a bit to... come... to..." You gasp as he starts moving again, almost like he's toying with you. Words fail you several times, body and mind overcome with pleasure that becomes electric when his thumb find your clit. "Ah!"

He knows exactly how to bend you to his will, he knows what he's doing to you, using your body for his pleasure while making you lose your mind to it. Because of him.

"What's that? Did you want to tell me something, huh baby?" He grins down at you, meeting your eyes for a moment before they close and yours roll back, overcome with a new wave of pleasure. Waves of cum wash over your insides, your legs pressing against him, the only thing that's keeping you sane.

[hiitsm]

Sweet Surrender

Sweet Surrender is for 18+ only.

Soft Smut & Aftercare

-

You hardly remember how it happened so quickly.

You had prepared a lovely dinner and set the table in a romantic way, eagerly awaiting your girlfriend's return home. The next thing you recall is her leaping into your arms with such affection that you couldn't help but let her gently tie you up with the new restraints on your shared bed.

Your legs are already trembling after allowing your girlfriend to explore your body in every possible way. She remained gentle throughout, with light touches, soft whispers, and just the perfect amount of pressure.

She didn't let you go over the edge just yet.

She wouldn't. She's a determined athlete, after all. She wants to see how long you can endure this. She wants to hear your soft whispers, your quiet moans. She wants to feel your body arching, seeking more pressure at your core.

You didn't even know it was possible for your legs to shake like this, especially without having been pushed over the edge multiple times. Your girlfriend, however, seems to absolutely adore it.

"Your legs are shaking, Bebita," Alexia grins up at you, her hands soothing your thighs with gentle strokes. "Ya están temblando, eso es sexy," she whispers, her face drawing closer to yours as her lips softly nibble on yours.

She kisses every inch of your face while soothing your legs with her gentle, strong hands. Her touch is comforting, and your legs begin to shake a little less.

"I don't think that I can walk tomorrow, and you haven't even made me come yet," you murmur to her, which makes her chuckle.

"Do you want to try for me?" she asks softly. Gently, she frees you from the restraints and helps you sit up, which makes your legs shake even more.

"I really don't think I can, Ale," you say, a bit panicked. Alexia notices and kisses you softly on the lips. "I'm here with you, amor. Please try for me," she whispers.

She grabs your hand and helps you up, supporting you until your feet touch the ground. Trembling, you cling to her tightly, afraid that if she lets go, your legs will give out and you'll fall to the floor.

You look into her eyes, pleading for her to lay you back down, until you notice her little cocky smirk. "I knew this was a tease,' you gasp, and Alexia laughs loudly.

"Sorry, amor, I couldn't help it," she tells you. You playfully roll your eyes, then glance down at your still-shaking legs.

"Please, lay me down on the bed and make me come," you say almost desperately. "So all of this was for something." You say and it makes your girlfriend looks playfully offended.

"It's always for something, bebita. It's my love for you," she teases back.

"No, this is torture," you retort, until both of you are laughing loudly.

"Okay, okay, let me give my bebita what she wants," she says before gently laying you back down.

She softly kisses your lips, then trails down to your neck, kissing, sucking, licking, and biting. It feels so good that you desperately need a release and feel like this could be it. Embarrassing, perhaps, but it doesn't matter.

"I love you," your girlfriend suddenly says, and you smile up at her.

"Te amo mucho," you reply, kissing her lips.

"You know what else I love?" she says with a grin. You already know where this is going and turn around, presenting your beautiful butt to her, up in the air.

"Sí, Bebita. Me encanta tanto tu hermoso trasero," she almost groans, holding your butt cheeks in her strong hands and kissing your lower back all the way down. So many soft, sweet kisses.

"I think I won't survive the night," she dramatically claims, hugging your butt and resting her face against it. "Te amo mucho," she whispers softly before rising, hovering over your back and gently pressing her weight onto you. She kisses your left cheek several times.

"You are so beautiful. I'm such a lucky woman," she murmurs, her voice filled with adoration as she plants more kisses on your cheek.

"I think l'm the lucky one," you reply.

Your girlfriend lowers herself again, trailing kisses and caresses down your back until she reaches your butt once more, drawing a quick moan from you. You can feel yourself growing wetter by the second, the anticipation building with every tender touch.

She finally puts her mouth on your core from behind, arousing you even more. "So wet, Bebita," she moans. "I'm so lucky." She squeezes your butt cheeks, and you moan in pleasure. Your legs begin to shake uncontrollably, and Alexia tries to hold you up.

"Wait, I need a slight pause," you gasp, needing to give your legs some rest.

"Of course, amor," she encourages, her voice soft and understanding. You sit up on your knees, and Alexia moves behind you, caressing your thighs and belly with her strong hands, providing comfort and support.

"You're doing so well," she whispers, her touch soothing your trembling body. You lean back into her, feeling her warmth and strength, grateful for the brief respite before you're ready to continue.

Alexia helps you back into position with gentle care.

"I have a surprise for you," she says with a playful grin, retrieving a vibrator from under the pillow.

"You can use this while I go back to what I was doing," she adds, placing it within your reach.

At first, you hesitate, but Alexia encourages you with a soft, reassuring smile.

"Go ahead, amor. I promise you'll love it."

With a deep breath, you start using the vibrator. The combined sensations of her touch and the new stimulation make you moan loudly, overwhelmed by the intense pleasure.

As you start using the vibrator, Alexia's encouragement and touch heighten your sensations even more. She resumes her position behind you, her hands gently caressing your thighs and buttocks, adding to the pleasure you're already experiencing.

"You're doing so well, amor," she whispers softly.

"Feel every bit of it. I'm here with you."

Her lips trail down your back, and she begins to pleasure you with a mix of kisses, soft bites, and gentle licks.

Her tongue finds its way to your core again, exploring with a tender yet insistent rhythm.

Each stroke of her tongue contrasts perfectly with the vibrator's steady pulse, creating an overwhelming blend of sensations that drives you wild.

Her hands are firm yet soothing, running up and down your thighs and caressing your belly. "You're so beautiful like this," she murmurs, her voice filled with admiration.

"Just let go and enjoy."

You moan louder as she continues her expert ministrations. Her lips and tongue work in perfect harmony with the vibrator, each touch and flick sending waves of pleasure through your body. Alexia's breath is warm and tantalizing against your skin, adding an extra layer of sensation.

"You're incredible," she whispers, her voice soft and encouraging. "Let it all out, amor. I'm right here."

The combined stimulation of the vibrator and Alexia's attentive oral pleasure brings you to the edge of ecstasy. With each wave of pleasure, you cling to her touch, overwhelmed by the intensity.

After you reached the peak of your pleasure, Alexia gently pulls away, her touch still tender and soothing.

She cuddles up to your back, wrapping her arms around you and pressing soft, loving kisses along your shoulders and neck.

"You were amazing, amor," she whispers, her voice filled with affection. "I'm so proud of you."

With a gentle touch, she helps you carefully clean up, using warm, soft cloths to ensure you feel fresh and comfortable. Her hands are delicate as she works, her attention to your needs reflecting her deep care for you.

Once you're refreshed, Alexia helps you stretch out on the bed and starts to massage your legs. Her strong hands work soothingly over the muscles, easing the tension from earlier.

"You're amazing, you know that?" she says, her voice gentle and comforting. "I love taking care of you like this."

You smile, feeling both relaxed and cared for. "I love you, mi vida. You always make everything perfect."

"You deserve all of it" she replies, continuing her gentle massage. "I love taking care of you like this. It makes me so happy."

As she works, she keeps up a soft stream of sweet talk. "You're so strong, so beautiful. I'm so lucky to have you," she says, her voice filled with affection.

"I feel lucky too," you respond, relaxing into her touch. "I couldn't ask for anything more."

Alexia finishes the massage, her hands lingering for a moment.

She pulls you close, holding you in a comforting embrace.

"Let's just stay like this for a while," she suggests, her voice a soothing murmur.

You nod, content, and the two of you settle into a peaceful, loving silence, wrapped in each other's arms.

[barcaatthemoon]

lullaby || lucy bronze x reader ||

you comfort lucy when she comes to your room after rachel's last game.

you weren't the least bit surprised to find lucy outside of your room after the game. more than a few of the girls had all grouped together for comfort after rachel's last game. lucy had held strong for the camp, having been warned earlier on by rachel herself. you had also been warned, but yours was more to make it easier to look out for lucy.

"can i sleep over tonight?" lucy asked you. keira had already gone to georgia and leah's rooms for the night. you were sure that a lot more girls were piled into the captain's room than just the three best friends, but what mattered was that lucy had come to you.

"of course you can," you told her. it wasn't late enough to sleep just yet, but lucy went straight to the bed. she laid down and curled up a little, something that you only saw her do whenever she was really upset. lucy ignored you as you moved around the room, grabbing a couple of water bottles for the two of you before you got into bed with her. "do you want to talk about it?"

"i don't want to talk about anything," lucy grumbled. you frowned a little to yourself, but let it go. lucy rested her head on your chest and grabbed onto your hand, squeezing it slightly. "do something, it's too quiet in here."

you're momentarily at a loss about what to do until you remember the night that keira and lucy had truly called it quits. it wasn't necessarily a good night for anybody, but it was definitely the start of your relationship.

…

"she don't want me no more." there was nothing scarier to you than a teary-eyed lucy bronze. you knew that lucy had planned on going over to keira's to talk after their last little argument. they had broken up twice already, but agreed to work things out. this time, hadn't been successful for lucy.

"luce, i'm sorry," you apologized to her. it wasn't your fault, and the apology only really made her kind of angry, but you didn't know what to do. lucy wasn't one to open up emotionally, especially not to you.

for the most part, lucy had no idea why she had come to your apartment. you weren't her friend, you were keira's. that was something you had made clear every single time that lucy had messed up in the past. however, there was still the part of lucy's brain that knew things weren't like that anymore.

somewhere along the line, something that shifted between the two of you. nothing had been acted on, but lucy had caught her eyes lingering on you for a little longer than normal. you had thoughts in a similar vein about lucy, and if it wasn't for keira being one of your best friends, you would have acted on your feelings.

"i just need somewhere to be for a while. can't be getting myself in trouble," lucy said. her accent was thicker through the tears. you nodded as you pulled her into your apartment. almost immediately, your cat raced across the living room to get as far away from lucy as he could. "little rat faced bastard."

"luce, be nice!" you hissed as you swatted at her shoulder.

"i'm over here crying and getting hissed at, so you hit me!" lucy shouted. you placed your hands on her arms, rubbing gently to try and soothe her. lucy moved like she was about to shove you away from her, only to surprise you by melting into your arms completely. she broke apart into a fit of sobs as your arms moved to hold her.

"hey, hey, it's okay," you whispered softly. lucy grabbed onto the back of your shirt and tugged you closer to her. you hummed nervously, unable to move away. slowly, you managed to get lucy to let you guide the two of you towards one of the chairs in your living room.

you picked the big, comfy one. everybody teased you for it being an eyesore, but you loved it. the pattern was hideous, but you had never sat in a more comfortable recliner in your entire life. as your body hit the back of the seat with lucy's on your lap, you were grateful for the slightly oversized chair.

lucy cried in your arms as you continued to hum. slowly, the hums grew into broken pieces of songs that you could remember. lucy's sniffles and sobs slowly came to a stop. you figured that she'd want you to be quiet now that she was done cry, but she pipped up at the first bit of prolonged silence.

"no, don't stop. i like the sound of your voice," lucy told you. she sounded a little whiny, but you weren't going to tease her for it. you started in on another little song, this time stopping when you saw lucy staring at you. it wasn't in annoyance or amusement like what you had grown accustomed to. this stare was different, and it made your chest feel warm and fuzzy.

"luce?"

"don't let me ruin this, please," lucy muttered. you had originally thought it was intended for you to hear, but once lucy pressed her lips to yours, you realized that it was a prayer of sorts.

…

you glanced down at lucy as she laid on your chest. her breathing had evened out finally, soft snores echoing each breath. you quietly snapped a picture for your phone, something that you'd want whenever the two of you went back to barcelona and she decided to pretend that this had never happened.

there were a few texts on your phone when you checked it. the first you saw was one from keira, warning you not to let lucy ruin your shirt with drool. you chuckled quietly to yourself, almost certain that it was only a matter of time before the puddle formed. the next couple were from rachel and millie, both women asking how lucy was doing. she had worried a lot of your teammates during rachel's celebratory dinner, even though she had been actively trying not to.

"stop moving around so much," lucy grumbled as she tugged your body closer to hers. "'m trying to sleep."

"it was just rach, she was wishing me a good night's rest," you said. lucy grumbled something, but it was muffled by her face being buried against your body. "i'm sorry, what was that?"

"tell her to fuck off. this is my time with you," lucy grumbled. you smiled as you placed your hand on her head to tip it back. she looked up at you with half-closed eyes and a pout, which you found adorable. "what the hell do you want?"

"a kiss, but if you're going to be an ass, i'll just go get one from someone else," you answered. lucy obviously did not like that answer as she shot up and pinned you beneath her on the mattress.

"who told you that you could kiss other girls?" lucy asked. she was getting possessive, like she tended to on your nights out with the team, but lucy never really did much other than fuck you.

"it's not like i've got a girlfriend, now is it?" you countered. lucy furrowed her brows, seemingly ready to give in to your one demand. you had been dropping all sorts of hints, doing everything short of actually giving her an ultimatum.

"sing me another song, and i'll take you out for breakfast tomorrow before we leave. a nice little date for just the two of us, but (y/n), are you sure about this? am i really who you want?" lucy asked you. she knew that you had gotten very close to hooking up with a couple of other girls on both the lionesses and at barcelona.

"lucy, you would not be in my bed right now if i wasn't sure. do you think i just sing every pretty little bird that crosses my path to sleep? what kind of woman do you take me for?" you pretended to be offended, up until lucy cradled your face and pressed a soft kiss to your lips.

"my deepest apologies, and for the record, i think you're like some sort of disney princess. the kind that would give ingrid a run for her money," lucy complimented. "so, do you want to be my girlfriend? i think you've kind of had the position for a while, but might as well make it offical, yeah?"

"might as well, yeah," you echoed. lucy smiled, this time pulling you into her arms. you let the music resume on your phone, singing along to the songs until you felt lucy's body relax beneath yours.

[kayhi808]

First Crush - 4

It's been about a week & a half since you've seen Bucky Barnes around the Tower. You knew he was out on a mission, but didn't know when he'd be returning. Abby has been asking you if you've see him at work.

You spent an entire evening with Abby sitting in your lap trying to explain that Bucky has to fly away sometimes to stop bad people. And sometimes we didn't know how long he'll be gone. "Are there plenty bad people, Mama?"

Hugging her tight, "There are a lot less, because Sergeant Barnes is very very good at catching the bad guys and putting them in jail. But sometimes his job takes a long time." Abby is silent, which is odd for your talkative daughter. "What's the matter, Baby?"

She shakes her head, getting out of your lap, to hug you around the neck, "Cans I sleeps with yous, Mama?"

Worried, "Ok, baby." Maybe you didn't explain things correctly. Did she not understand?

*****

You've been with Fury all morning attending his meetings with him so you were there when he was notified that Bucky's team returned. You attended the debriefing and you couldn't help but sneak glances at Bucky. Besides a bruise along his jaw and a split lip, he looked fine. You knew Abby was going to be thrilled when you told her tonight that Bucky was home.

After the meeting concluded, you and Bucky were leaving at the same time. "I'm glad your mission was a success, Sergeant."

"Yea, thanks."

"Abby keeps asking me if you were home yet." Bucky laughs softly, but a smile lingers. "We...she was worried. We were worried."

"I'm fine," shrugging off his cuts and bruises.

"I'm glad."

He leans in, making your hold your breath, "My friends call me, Bucky."

A little breathy, "Y/N." Before you know it, you're at your office door.

"See you around, Y/N." He turns as he walks away, "Tell Abby I said 'hi'."

*****

Lifting Abby onto her chair at the dinner table, "Guess who I saw today?"

Her head whips to you, eyes wide, "Mr. S'gent came home?" You smile wide & nod. She claps her hands & screams and slides down from her chair.

"Abby?" She runs away still screaming, "Abigail!" She stops turning back to you. "Get back here, please. What are you doing?"

"I needs to draws him a letter, Mama!"

You laugh, "You need to eat your dinner first. Come sit down." Frowning she waddles back to you. "I didn't say you couldn't do it, but you need to eat dinner first." You kiss her and put her back in her seat.

Still frowning, "Did he get the bad guys?"

"He did!" Placing her raviolis in front of her, clipping a napkin around her neck. Pasta gets a little messy. "He also wanted me to tell you he said 'hi'."

Abby's frown disappears, "He 'members me?"

"Of course he remembers you. I told you he wouldn't forget." She does a happy wiggle in her chair & laughs. She quickly eats her dinner so she can get to her letter writing...drawing.

"Mama?"

"Yes, Baby?"

Bringing her paper to you, "Can you make the words over here?"

"Sure, what do you want it to say?"

Leaning her body against you, looking at the blank paper, "Um...ummm"

"You want me to write, Um Um?"

She laughs, "No, Mama! Writes "good work'."

"You mean good job?"

"Uh huh, yea. Good job." She watches you write and takes the paper back to her little desk. She draws a stick person with colorful circles over her head, that you are guessing are balloons. "Can we go give it to Mr S'gent now?"

"Baby, its late, no. You need to take a bath & go to sleep. When I go to work on Monday, I'll make sure he gets it."

"No! I wants to give it!" Her mouth turns down in a frown & her eyes start to tear.

"Abby, it's the weekend. And you need to go to daycare..."

"Oh, please mama!" You noticed it's not a tantrum or stubbornness, but it's almost like she's distressed.

"Baby?" You gather her in your lap. "What's wrong?" She cries.

You rub her back trying to comfort her. "The bad people."

Aw shit. You shouldn't have told her about bad people when explaining Bucky's job. "You worried about the bad people? What bad people?"

"They...they fight Mr. S'gent." She cries harder. You feel horrible for making her worried. Your eyes fill with tears too.

"Honey, Mr. Sergeant is ok. I promise." Her tears stop but her grip on you hasn't lessen. You untangle yourself from her to wipe away her tears with the hem of your shirt & giving her kisses. "Ok, how about this, you cannot come to work with Mama, but we can go there tomorrow & drop off your letter at his office so he sees it first thing when he comes in to work. How does that sound? You'll be able to give him a surprise and I"m sure that will make him so happy."

"I surprises him?"

You nod, "And after we leave his surprise, we can go to the park & picnic. We can feed the ducks. Would you like that? Would that make you feel better?" She nods & rubs her face in your shirt. "I love you so much, my baby."

@waywardhunter95 @wintrsoldrluvr @rebeccapineapple @ordelixx @onceithough @crazyunsexycool @thezombieprostitute @ilovetaquitommmm @julvrs @unaxv @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @samsgirl93

Next Chapter

[honey-on-your-tongue]

FWB

Part one

Logan Howlett x fem!reader

Series masterlist

You first met Logan when he showed up at the X mansion, angry and distant and cold. You shrugged it off, every mutant had their own story and you respected that.

You could tell he was afraid to open up at first, particularly around you because you were always so curious about his ability. It fascinated you that he could heal just like that.

You could mend tissue or tear it apart on your body or anyone else's, and it took an extraordinary amount of energy. His body did it automatically and in a matter of seconds.

He didn't appreciate your enthusiasm. But eventually, you two warmed up to one another. And you might've even considered each other friends.

It started because...well...Logan is a complicated man. Very complicated. He's very picky about who he lets get close to him, and even then he remains reserved.

But Jean had been in his heart since day one. You never knew why, he refused to talk about her to anyone.

And then she died. And then she wasn't dead. And then he had to kill her.

He wasn't okay for a long while. He didn't even hit on every pretty woman he saw, as was usual.

And one day he just...snapped.

-

Logan's pent up. Jean's death is a weight on his shoulders he can't shake. And because of that, he can't focus. So he isn't working well, he isn't functioning. So his solution is to jack off, let go of some steam. But it doesn't work. He can't come on his own, no matter how hard he tries. No matter what porn he watches.

Then this one time, this funny thing happened? He was jerking off in his room—trying to, at least—and he heard your voice. You were walking down the hall, talking to someone.

“...so good,” you were saying, probably to a student about how they'd done in an exam.

For some reason, he imagined you on all fours on the bed, back arched, hands holding onto the bed sheets for life as he pounded you from behind.

He could imagine your voice crying out, “So good! So good!”

And suddenly—

His cock twitched, a groan left his lips and before he knew what was happening, he was coming all over himself. Thick spurts of his load spilled onto his hand, dripped down his cock, sticky and warm.

He gasped for breath, unable to understand what had just happened. So quick, so easy. And all because he just imagined you...

He shakes his head. That's wrong. You're his friend. You two work together and he doesn't wanna fuck that up.

So he pushes the thought away and pretends it never happened.

But later that day, when he runs into you in the kitchen, he's embarrassed, ashamed, maybe even a little guilty. You don't seem to notice as you just greet him and go about whatever you were doing.

He can't keep his eyes off you, can't look away. And the next thing he knows, you're bending over to grab a plate from one of the lower kitchen drawers and his cock springs to attention.

He clenches his jaw as he feels himself hardening, his mind already conjuring up images of you bent over his bed, that pretty ass of yours bouncing as he fucks you from behind. Your pussy all wet and spread out for him. Your hands grabbing onto the bed sheets like your life depends on it...

“Lo?” you ask, and he's snapped out of his thoughts.

“Hm?” he grunts, trying as discreetly as he can to take a step towards the counter and hide his growing erection from you.

“I asked if you want anything? I'm gonna go to the store, buy some ice cream for some of the kids.”

A few condoms and lube would work, he thinks to himself. Before remembering you can hear other people's thoughts when it's something they mean to say but don't.

You raise your eyebrows. “Oh. Um. Okay.” You nod, pretty cheeks blushing slightly. “I'll...Yeah. Alright. Any...particular ones?”

He feels like crawling into a hole and dying, but it's too late now. “No,” he replies, shaking his head. “Just...I need some extra large ones, though.”

Your blush deepens and you glance away, clearing your throat. “Right. Okay. I'll...be back soon.”

He nods curtly and watches you walk away. Once you're out of sight, he grabs his head in his hands.

“Fuckin' idiot,” he murmurs, his appetite lost, and he turns around to go back to his room.

The thing is, his cock is still hard and it's getting extremely uncomfortable. And he's leaking precum onto his pants.

He groans as he closes the door, in too much of a hurry as he kicks his pants off, his cock hard, the tip a dark red.

He lays down on his bed, spits on his hand. He fists his cock and jerks it a few times slowly, before closing his eyes and imagining some girl's pussy.

But it doesn't work. Fuck, it doesn't work. He thinks of all the random women he's fucked, all his hookups, and nothing. Absolutely nothing. His cock is still hard, his hand is getting tired.

And then you pop into his head. Cute eyes, soft lips, that gorgeous body.

He knows it's wrong, but he just can't help it. So, he jerks off to the thought of you. Those pretty lips around his cock, your hands holding onto his arms as he fucks you hard. Your face all scrunched up in pleasure...

He doesn't realize he's moaning your name, gasping and groaning like a fucking dog until the door swings open.

“You called? I was just about to leave—”

His eyes snap open, his hand on his cock freezes. He glances at the door and meets your gaze just before your eyes fall on his cock.

“Oh,” you say, voice trembling a little. “'m sorry, I...I thought...I could've sworn you said my name—I mean, I thought you were calling me...”

“I was,” he says stupidly, breathless, too stunned to even cover himself up.

You swallow thickly, eyes darting nervously around the room. When your gaze meets his, he thinks, for what it's worth, I was thinking of you.

Your eyes widen and you blush even more, a strangled, nervous sound leaving your mouth. “I-I gotta go to the store. The kids are waiting for their ice cream. Um...Bye,” you stutter out and leave, shutting the door after yourself.

He lays back on his bed, covering his face with one hand. “Fuck,” he groans. Now he's going to have to talk to you and that can't possibly end well.

---

Blog masterlist

Taglist

@nerrivm @rosiahills22 @d3vils-adv0c8 @thychuvaluswife @18lkpeters @daddy333 @e-nonsense @ch3rryblossms @ayamenimthiriel @thesecretlifeofmo @simming4sims @raideaters-blog @1cam8 @angelicbbsblog

[sictkrs]

Boyfriend!SteveHarrington and having sex in his car on his work break drabble because I feel like that's a thing that would totally happen.

warnings!: MNDNI 18+. Unprotected (pls use protection irl) p in v. Light praise kink? Public sex?, sex in car. grinding/dryhumping.

Smut under the cut :3

_______________________________________________

"Fu-fuck, honey, I don't know i-if this.." he trails off, his head hitting the headrest with a soft thud. His grip strained on your waist as his eyes shut tight. Trying to hold onto some control of the situation. But he seems to fail miserably when you give him another roll of your hips. He lets out a soft whimper. 

Your eyes trace every feature on his face, trying to remember every detail of the boy in front of you. His usual perfect hair is slightly messy now, strands falling into his face as he presses the back of his head against the seat again. It’s almost euphoric to see him like this. Your sweet, smug boyfriend, all needy and embarrassed. After letting out a shaky breath, he continues.

"I don’t know if this is the best idea, sweetheart."

His eyes meet yours. The pretty hazel colour all glazed over as he looked at you.

"You want me to stop?"

You ask, now slightly worried that you pushed him too far.

"Nononono, don't stop, please. I-I'm just scared Robin is gonna tap at the window or something and see us," he says with an airy laugh, looking down at you. He loved having you like this, straddling him in his car, the risk of Robin or anyone else from work, for that matter, seeing him like this.

"So… You want me to speed up?"

Your head tilted to the side as you asked, looking at the brown-haired boy.

"Please" 

He asks, desperate for any source of friction besides the tightness of his jeans.

Your hands make quick work of the jeans as he supports your hips, lifting you up a little so you're able to shuffle them down to his knees, bringing his boxers down in suit.

He lets out a relieved sigh as his cock finally hits the warm air.

His fingers go under your skirt, pulling the lacey panties down. He has a satisfied smirk on his face as he sees the wet spot on them.

Finally, he runs the tip of his cock against your folds. Your shared arousal mixed as you let out a shaky breath. He does the motion again, pressing his tip against your swollen bundle of nerves. A whimper escapes your lips.

"Steve…" 

You whisper out a small plea for him.

"I know, honey. I know" 

He whispers in response. He holds your hips and slowly gets you to sink onto him. His thick member stretches out your walls so deliciously. He lets out a low groan. You take the opportunity to start rocking on him; you can feel how his cock throbs in you, and soon the car is filled with wet squelching sounds and muffled moans as your arms wrap around his neck and his hands are placed lower on your hips, gripping into the plush of your ass as he lets out groans of pleasure.

"That's it, baby; that's a good girl."

He whispers into your ear, his breath hot on your neck as you move, back and forth, up and down. The praise fills your senses as he whispers little encouragements.

"Fuck, feels so good. Taking me so well"

He talks mindlessly. His eyes shut tight. Soon, precise movements become sloppier as he fucks up into you, causing you to moan into his shoulder. A knot is starting to wind in your stomach.

"ah, shit… can feel your pussy pulling me deeper, baby."

Steve mumbles. 

"S-steve... I, please"

You blab out. The knot squeezes tighter and tighter. You can tell he's almost there too by the way he thrusts up more into you instead of letting you ride him.

"yeahyeahyeah me too, honey. Just let go when you need to. Wanna feel you cum around my cock."

He mutters into your ear, his grip on your ass tightening as you bounce on his cock.

After he thrusts up more, pressing right against that sweet spot in your sponge walls, you can feel the white-hot pleasure take over. A string of obscenities leaves your lips as you cum around him, your legs shaking as you moan his name so sweetly in his ear. It sets him off too, fucking his white rops of cum into you, whimpering and moaning at the way your walls practically milk his cock of anything.

Your chest flushes against his as you catch your breath, your cunt still clenching around his sensitive member. After a few seconds, he places a kiss against your head, his shoulders slumped and loose.

"Did so good for me, baby" 

He whispered sweetly. You hum back in response.

"What time is it?"

You ask, looking up at him, your eyes half-lidded as you look up at your sweet boyfriend. He glanced at the clock on the car. A relaxed smile on his face.

"Ten minutes since my break ended"

He says. You groan and rest your head against his chest.

"I don't want you to leave."

You whisper into his shirt. He runs his fingers through your hair.

"I don't have to."

He whispers, pressing another kiss on your head.

"You can't leave Robin all alone, Steve. You're already late. 

"I'm sure she'd understand."

He says this, trying to convince you. You snort. 

"What are you gonna say, huh? 'Sorry, I ditched you, Robin. I was tired because I had to go have sex with my girlfriend in the parking lot'."

He smiles at your mockery and lets out an airy laugh.

"We'll figure it out." 

[kalki-tarot]

CHANNELED LOVE LETTER FROM FUTURE SPOUSE ♡

my readings are for entertainment purposes only! tarot is a divination tool. it is not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i don’t take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings. please be mindful of your own choices and actions ♡

PILE 1

Hello beautiful/handsome,

I saw you in the party, where everyone was busy with themselves, with their own groups. And you, you were sitting alone, pouring your own drink. You looked very beautiful to me. Just like a queen/king. Your straightforwardness and dominant behavior, is what I love the most. I crave you, dear. Oh. I can literally fight to win you. You are just like a prize. You have your priorities clear. Even if it's a run and chase, I'll follow you everywhere till my heart stops and i die.

You are very career oriented, you don't bs unnecessarily. I love your perception of life. I love how you stand up for yourself, even if you're alone. You are just like a Queen to me. You seem very distant, as if you're lost in your dreams. You have that dreamy side of yours too? I don't know. I just observe you from afar. You give me such soothing vibes, I just love being around you.

You make me forget my miseries. I love how you don't do wrong to anyone. You are very compassionate and loving. You can give love to even non living objects. You're so full of love. That makes me wanna love you, even more. Sweetheart. I love you. I want to pursue you, i want to make you mine. Do you think the same? Do you love me just the way I love you? I'm waiting for your answer.

Yours faithfully,

Love.

PILE 2

I don't have the right words to truly express what I feel. I'm not in a good place right now. It feels as if everyone has given up on me. I'm sorry if I'm I'm making you uncomfortable but certain situations are out of my hands. I feel left out in the cold. I have the responsibility of my family on my shoulders. I'm trying to make fast changes. I'm trying to do everything on my own.

I'm very repressive of my emotions. I was not taught how to deal with them. Sometimes I try to run away from life. But then I get reminded of you. I look at the night's sky, full of stars and I wonder maybe you are like a star too. Lightening the dark and cold world with compassion and warmth. You give me true strength. And I'm forever grateful for your presence in my life. I'm holding onto a lot of things right now. I know i should let everything free, even myself. It's okay to make mistakes, right?

After every storm, there is a deep silence. Where everything remains silent, destroyed and out of control. No matter what life throws at me, I'll come back to you with ten times more strength, power & especially love and respect for you. It's life after all, right? Everything comes and goes. Maybe these times will pass? But I'll love you more with each passing moment for sure.

Yours Only Forever

💗

PILE 3

I have too much of love and wealth. And that too much is being sucked off by others. I don't know what to do. Money can't buy love, sweetheart. I'm in a toxic relationship. They are taking away my everything. Literally everything.

I don't remember the last time I laughed. The money I earned through hard work, the morals and kindness my family taught me, everything is in vain. Everything is slowly leaving my body. I feel empty from inside. This person is taking away it all.

But I'm working hard, more hard, harder than even. So that I can provide you a better lifestyle. I can't expect anything from anyone. I have to do it all alone. Please remember me in your prayers. I'm afraid to let go. Everything is being taken away from me. I don't know what to do, I'm confused. I'm not sure which road to take. I believe the universe will guide me where I'm supposed to be, near you. I'm depressed nowadays. Very hopeless.

But I'm doing whatever i can do right now. I'm unable to even sleep at night. They lied to me. They deceived me. They were my life partner, but there was nothing "life-like" with them. It was just a relationship built on money. And you know how these type of things end. There is no emotion left in me. I'm blank. I don't know. They left me in the middle of the road.

PILE 4

Hello pretty soul ♡

You know what? I see you every where. Whenever I go, wherever I go. I see you, i get reminded of you, by the flowers, the clovers, the river, the clouds and even the sun! You are a beautiful and positive person! You are such a great fighter! Whatever obstacles comes between our happiness, you remove it all. I get so happy and optimistic near you, my love. I'll fight with literally anyone for you, just for you.

You bring absolute calmness and peace into my chaotic life. You are a sweet breeze flowing softly over my cheeks on a warm, sunny day making me blush. I want to take care of you and love you for eternity. I want to offer you all the love that I have inside me, just for you babygirl/boy. I want to experience new things with you everyday. You make my life feel lively. ✨️

Dear, sometimes I too get lost in my past, that was not, unfortunately that happy for sure. I got lied to, i was betrayed by someone I called mine. I can't sleep properly due to this. I get nightmares and I get so f*king scared. I feel anxious and uncomfortable. But the good news is! I'm forgetting it day by day. Just a little progress makes it a whole lot of progress. I don't want to remember all these with you. I'm working hard, I'm moving forward. And i hope you're too <3

By,

Your one and only . ❤️

[p1utofairy]

PAC: “good karma my aesthetic. keep my conscience clear, that's why i’m so magnetic.” 🩰🍥🫧🪷

• what do you need to hear right now?

disclaimer ✩: take what resonates, leave what doesn't. i really appreciate y’all sm <3 for the patience, the love, the feedback and support. y’all are the greatest ever. i’m open to pac suggestions as well, so don’t hesitate to slide in my ask box! xoxo.

pile 1 ☂️ —

heyyy pile 1 ⭐️ what you need to hear right now is: release. relax and let go of any unhealthy attachments you may have to a certain person, place, idea or thing. i think you've been holding onto someone/something or the idea of what it could be/could’ve been. i pick up a feeling of yearning. you’ve been wanting something to work out in your favor, so you’ve been holding out…waiting to see if this situation will turn out how you anticipate. big 3 of wands energy. you’ve been waiting awhile now (i’m hearing weeks for some, months for others) for a clear answer. i think the more you wait around and stall things, the less likely things will go into motion. don’t chase, attract. remember that things will flow naturally to you and it’ll always work out in your favor no matter what — when one door shuts, several more will open. don’t put a time frame on it, you’ll get your answer/wish/clarity when you least expect. keep focusing on yourself and what you’re currently doing! whether that be going to school, work, the gym, studying, spending time with friends, etc. there’s a certain area in your life that you greatly want change to occur in, i’m heavily picking up for some that this is in regards to your love life, and again — i keep hearing that things will unfold in your favor when you least expect. very soon. you’re on the brink of something great, just don’t overthink it. relax, take a breath and just BE. your guides will handle the rest. love, prosperity and abundance are on the way to you. it just may not appear in the way you envision, which doesn’t mean it won’t happen at all. think about it this way, you might fantasize about coming across your dream person while you’re in a bookstore (on some ‘harry met sally’ type shit lol) so every time you go into a bookstore you’re kinda anticipating that to happen, but let’s say your busy at work or you’re frantically trying to prioritize doing your school work and studying and out of nowhere you look up and make eye contact with this person you’ve never seen before but you can feel the ✨vibe✨ like WHOA that’s…my person. i just see you being in your element when you meet this person pile 1, your mind will not be preoccupied/you will not have any precognitive thoughts — your person will just reveal themselves to you out of the blue. okay i feel like i’m getting carried away lol but everything’s gonna work out even better than you imagined pile 1 💗 trust that.

other channeled messages:

don't settle for less, pink + white by frank ocean, strawberry milkshake, chemtrails over the country club by lana del rey, leo sun, cancer moon, vedic astrology

pile 2 🦢 —

what's goodddd pile 2! i feel like you're in your self-love/healing era. you just bounced back from something and you did it with such resilience, ease and grace might i add. i'm hearing church girl by beyoncé, “i'm gonna love on me, nobody can judge me but me! i was born free.” okayyyyyy pile 2 i love this for y'all. i think some of you are really working on strengthening your throat chakra by speaking up for yourself and setting boundaries. just saw a meme that said “how i reclaimed the word ‘cunt’ by being one” OH WOW WOW WOW. i think you’re just over a lot of people and their bullshit, you may have just gotten out of a relationship, had a friendship breakup or recently left a job. good for you 💗whichever situation applies to you, i know it was draining and heavy on your shoulders. you finally feel like a weight has been lifted and you can spread your wings and be free. idk why i’m hearing some of you might be listening to a lot of lana del rey lately? (random but REAL af lol) i love that you know yourself at the core pile 2, you can’t fake it…if somethings not pleasing you or it’s not in your best interest, you know how to walk away and find something better. you don’t even know it, but you're inspiring to a lot of people. i think what you need to hear is: keep being your true authentic self. never forget where you came from and who helped you along the way, because i see that you have a big, bright and successful future ahead of you pile 2. you’re gonna be a star. “the diamond in the rough” from aladdin is what i’m hearing. you’ve got the wit, talent and empathy to get where you need to be in life. i wish you nothing but happiness and success pile 222 ♾️

other channeled messages:

hurricane by bridgit mendler, switch a n**** out by summer walker, olivia pope, sagittarius rising, cancer moon, pisces energy, save your tears remix by the weeknd & ariana grande, on my shoulders by sabrina claudio, red dress

pile 3 💵 —

hi pile 3 🤗 i’m getting rich vibes from y’all already lmfao, even if you aren’t (yet) there’s this energy of being very well-kept and liking the nicer things in life. you love you some good ol’ retail therapy. the message you need to hear right now is: spend your money wisely. i think you need to budget/save a bit more pile 3, you can sometimes go a bit overboard and indulge in the latest clothes, upscale restaurants or beauty products. you like nice things!!! there’s nothing wrong with that at all, you just need to make sure you’re prioritizing and balancing your earnings. some of you that picked this pile have very young energy lol like i can see you chilling at like 12am scrolling on youtube/tiktok and ooo’ing and aaa’ing at so many different product reviews and adding shit to your cart. some of you are tempted to buy stuff from the tiktok shop too lolll that was so oddly specific but i also feel like you've been big on protecting your peace lately. kickin’ back by mila j is coming to mind, “i’m kickin' back and i’m lightin' up doin' what the fuck i want. just rolled a wood, i’m feelin' good. just me, myself and this blunt.” i know das rightttt pile 3 🤭 you know your worth and you’re not settling for less than anything that you deserve — i love this.

other channeled messages:

luxurious by gwen stefani, need to know by doja cat, i just had an epiphany i need to go to tiffany’s, fenty gloss bomb, chanel chance, scorpio moon, catching flights not feelings

[luveline]

For Eddie and Roan, can you write a ficlet where Roan wakes up sick and goes to Eddie's bed to wake him up and tell him she doesn't feel good and he's worried and takes her temperature and sees that she's fever, so he stays at home taking care of her?

eddie and roan ♡

Roan's head feels heavy as a bowling ball. She focuses very hard on not falling over, and so she doesn't realise you're awake and sitting up until she's climbing onto the bottom of your bed. 

“Hey, princess,” you whisper, holding your finger to your lips, “daddy's still sleeping.” 

She loves you, but she ignores you. She loves you, capital L, but she needs her dad. You don't try to stop her, the book on your thighs closing as you let your hiked knees fall. “Ro?” you ask. 

“Dad,” she whines, “I need you to be awake.” 

Eddie puts his hand up to her face. Roan groans and tips her head back as he feels along her head to the soft crop of hair at the base of her neck. “Why?” he asks hoarsely, pulling her in blindly.  

Parcelled against his chest, Roan can hardly breathe. “Daddy,” she says urgently. 

He lifts his head on the pillow, eyes peeled back painstakingly slowly. “What's the matter, Ro?” 

She knew he'd know there was something wrong. Her dad knows everything even when he says he doesn't, and her eyes fizzle with tears in the gentle embrace of his arm. He rubs her back accordingly. “What's wrong, baby?” he asks, adopting his softest of tones. 

Roan hides her face in his chest shyly. “I feel bad…” 

Eddie feels suddenly and extremely worried at the sight of her. He panics hard, heart in his mouth sort of panic, but then you touch his elbow and he remembers he's not doing it alone anymore. 

“What kind of sick?” he asks. 

Roan curls into her pill bug shape on top of him and cries about her head feeling weird and her tummy aching. He puts his hand on her stomach and finds it bloated despite it being rather small otherwise. He has no idea what it means, but he assures her it'll be okay the way he always does, murmurs said between teeny kisses pressed to her temple and his fingers raking down through her hair one rumpled curl at a time. 

Your second alarm rings. 

You get dressed quickly and Eddie doesn't move. He knows he can't go to work, not when she's like this. He can't imagine sending her to school, and can't imagine leaving her home this sort of sick without him. He remembers all those years ago feeling sick as a dog wishing Wayne could stay home just to keep him company, and he remembers being smaller, his mom on the couch, his sweaty head in her lap.  

You hop into one of your socks, smiling at him over her head. He smiles back. What can you do? it says. 

Perfume sprayed, hair done, you stand in the doorway brushing your teeth. “I can go get you some stuff before I go to work if I rush. Sorry, I wasn't thinking. She likes the cream of mushroom soup, right? Or is it cream of chicken?” 

“Both. Mushroom’s her favourite. And white rice. And cranberry juice.” 

“I know she wants cranberry juice,” you say around a mouthful of froth, waving your hand, “don't insult me, Eds.” 

He feels her forehead. She'd felt warm enough to guess she was sick, but her forehead is ember hot. “Aw, god,” he says, sitting up despite his twinging back, Roan held tight to his chest. “Can you get me a hand towel? Soak it in some cold water?” 

“Sure thing,” you say, rushing off. 

“This isn't cool, Ro, you weren't gonna tell me you're a human furnace? Thought we told each other everything?” he asks, brushing her hair back from her face. 

“I'm hot,” she says. 

He taps the tip of her nose. Her eyes focus on his finger, so he figures she'll be okay for now. “I know. I can feel it.” He'll hold a cold hand towel to her head for a bit to give her the chance to calm down, and if she doesn't cool he'll give her a lukewarm bath. There will be things to do, taking her temperature, calling the school, calling the doctor, rubbing her small back, but he's done it before. He can handle it without you. 

“I'm just a phone call away, okay?” you say, passing him the wrung towel carefully. “If you need anything, just call me.” You kiss his cheek, then Roan's. “Promise?” 

“I'll call you,” he says honestly. “But we'll be okay, won't we, babe?” 

Roan mumbles something unintelligible. Eddie's pretty sure she's saying we'll be fine. 

[golden1u5t]

honeymoon | s.r x fem!reader

ꨄ requested: anonymous

ꨄ genre: angst + fluff + smut(more so the beginning)

ꨄ summary: sex has always been a bad subject growing up, it was shunned upon to give into your bodies desires without being married or wanting kids. the abuse that came with this topic has caused you to hide away from it, you've never told spencer but when you do, he makes sure to make you as comfortable as he can.

spencer stopped in his tracks as he noticed you standing in the middle of the room with your head turned away from him, he let go of his shirt so that it dropped back down over his body. when he reached out and touched your arm you jumped, looking back at him with wide eyes.

"sweetheart? are you alright?" he asked, wrapping his hand around your wrist and guiding you to sit on the bed. you leaned onto his shoulder and sighed, intertwining your fingers with his.

"it's our honeymoon- people have sex on their honeymoon!" you sat up and looked down at the ring on your finger, not yet used to the feeling of it weighing on your finger yet but you knew that you would eventually get used to it just like you would get used to the new last name.

"sex isn't a requirement to have a honeymoon, its just something people do to feel good and connect with their partners. there are some people in the world that are completely uninterested in sex. don't feel obligated, honey."

spencer honestly wouldn't mind if you didn't ever want to have sex, he went majority of his life without it, he was just grateful you're in his life and he's able to call you his wife. he wants you for the rest of his life, with or without the sex.

"no, that's not it." you huffed, sitting up from his shoulder and averting your gaze to the big window in the hotel room you were both staying at. your room was a suite, a wedding gift from rossi, so you could see over the busy city below.

"do you remember when i told you that i grew up in a very toxic household?" spencer nodded his head, you let out a small laugh because he remembers everything, it was a question you didn't even have to ask. "well, sex was a very touchy subject. i was always told that women were just to have children, that we couldn't do it unless we were married and ready for kids. but i'm not- i don't want any children right now and i don't want you to think badly about me because of it."

you brought a hand up to try and stop the tears that were streaming down your cheeks. it was no use though, the second spencer reached up and cupped your face with gentle hands, the floodgates opened. he didn't try to force you to look at him, he knew that you would when you were ready, you were putting yourself in a vulnerable position.

"i would never think any less of you because of that. you know that, angel." spencer's voice was soft, as if he was talking to a scared child. he ran his thumb over the skin under your eye, wiping away those salty tears that escaped.

you leaned into him and buried your head into his chest, hands grasping at his shirt. spencer's hand fell onto your back and started to rub soothing circles while you caught your breathe and calmed down.

while he held you like that you started to imagine how he would hold you in bed, how his hands would gently caress your skin, how he would make you feel safe and comfortable with him. you knew he would do all those things for you, you knew he would do anything you wanted. all you had to do was ask him and he would move in a heartbeat to make sure you got it, no matter what it was.

though, you were still having a lot of doubts and you needed to gain more confidence in yourself before you were willing to shed layers of coverage from your body, bring your guard down and let him into the last blocked off part of you.

so, for now you laid there in his arms, listening to the busy streets of the city and feeling his heartbeat against your cheek. spencer dropped his head down and rested his head on top of yours, his hand moving up your back and running his fingers through your hair.

everything in that moment was perfect, it was like when he wrapped his arms around you he somehow made a bubble of security. that's when you decided you wanted him, you wanted to bring those walls down and share yourself with him because you knew he would take care of you, he would be gentle with you.

"i want to try it." you spoke, though your voice was muffled from the way you were pressed against his chest. spencer let out a hum of confusion, pulling back and looking down at you. so you sat up and repeated yourself.

"are you sure? this is something you need to make sure you really want." his eyes scanned your face for any sign that would contradict your words but he couldn't find any.

"i'm sure, spence." you place your hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze, leaning forward and placing your lips on his. spencer let go of your hand and placed them on your waist instead.

spencer pulled away from your lips and instructed you to get higher on the bed. as soon as you laid back on the bed, he was crawling on top of you. you quickly discarded your shirt and started to push your pants down but spencer caught your wrist in his hands.

"patience, angel. i'll get there."

[achilles-rage]

Good Luck Charm: Chapter 7

college football player!buck x plus size!reader

summary: the weeks pass and you and evan get closer, hanging out more and more outside of the library. you try to leave the library early one day, but when evan pouts about it, you agree to let him go get groceries with you. then, you go for a drive with him one night.

word count: 3.9k

previous chapter

series masterlist

A/N: the way i was giggling and kicking my feet writing this. i have nothing else to say. thank you so much for all the kind words so far!! i'm really loving writing this fic!<33

warnings: no use of y/n, fem!reader, race inclusive!reader, inexperienced!reader, evan being the only man ever<3

You continue to hang out with Evan for a few weeks, nothing much else happening but quick kisses and stolen glances. You’ve begun to hang out with Evan outside of the library; going to different restaurants and going on walks around campus, but you still haven’t gone to each other’s places. Not that he doesn’t want to. He’s been itching to get his hands on you, but because he’s letting you set the pace, and you’re still almost as nervous as the first day he kissed you, he holds back.

Your assignment is practically forgotten by now, as you both spend more time talking to each other in the library than actually doing any work. It doesn’t matter much; you’ve gotten a lot more done than most people in your class, but you’re still not completely done.

Tonight, you plan to get groceries, but Evan puts up such a fight when you tell him you have to leave the library early that you’re now forced to drag him around the grocery store with you. You almost give in to him when he complains, but knowing you’re running out of food in your fridge, you know you can’t put it off any longer. At least he agrees to drive you there, meaning you don’t have to lug your groceries a couple of blocks back to your apartment.

“You go grocery shopping with a list?” he exclaims as you pull up the note on your phone. You turn your head slowly to look at him, blinking as you take in his words.

“You- you don’t write a grocery list?” You’re in disbelief. How else are you supposed to shop? How else would you know what you need?

“Why would I?” he asks, a hand on the shopping cart as you push it around the produce aisles, picking up some fruits and vegetables on your list.

“To plan out your meals? Write down what you’re running out of?” you explain, and you can’t help but laugh softly at his words. It’s such a boy thing to say, you think.

“I have a meal plan for football. I basically just get the same things every week.” he murmurs, shrugging as he follows you around the store. You bark out a laugh, shaking your head.

“Let me guess, chicken and rice? Maybe some broccoli?” you tease, laughing louder when he looks down at you with furrowed brows, and you realize that you’re right.

“Why would I need anything else?” he says, pouting slightly as you laugh at him. Your eyes soften at his pout and you give him a soft smile as you try not to laugh anymore.

“Some people like having a variety, Ev.” you tell him, rolling your eyes at the fact that he really eats like how you’ve heard some student athletes eat.

He can’t help but smile at your nickname for him. He wants you to say it again, but he knows it would be weird if he were to ask you to.

You make your way around the store, going through your list, which you have strategically written in order of how you walk around the store. The slight pout has made its way back onto his face, upset that you’re focused more on your list than him, but he keeps following you around the store, making jokes every now and then. 

You’re almost done when you pass by a big display of cookies. Evan stops and grabs one of the large boxes, chuckling softly as he holds it out to you.

“Do you remember these cookies? I used to beg my mom to get them, but she stopped buying them because I always snuck them when she wasn’t looking and ate the entire box in less than a week.” he tells you, an amused smile plastered to his face. You smile at his story, but shake your head, telling him you’d never had them. He scoffs, and throws the box towards the cart, telling you that you just had to buy them, but the box misses the cart. It bounces back towards the display, which causes the top few rows to topple down, the sound echoing through the store.

He smiles sheepishly as you bury your face in your hands, your cheeks heating up in embarrassment as everyone around you whips their heads around at the noise. He laughs awkwardly, picking up the box he threw and putting it in the cart. He stands still for a minute, but seeing a few people still looking at him makes him drop down and pick up another box, gently placing it back on the display. He quickly walks over to you, your face still hidden in your hands, and puts his arms on either side of you to push the cart away.

You follow him, too embarrassed to even think of the way he has you trapped between his body and the cart. You take your hands away from your face once he navigates you out of the aisle.

“I thought you played football, you can’t even throw cookies into the cart?” you mumble, biting your lip. He smiles awkwardly, making his way to the checkout.

“You make me nervous, princess.” he teases softly, his face still flushed in embarrassment. Your eyes widen as you notice he’s on his way to the self-checkout.

“I still have a few things on my list.” you tell him quietly, looking up at him as he keeps you between his arms.

“We need to get out of here right now.” he whispers, noticing the worker that’s currently giving him the death glare, having seen the entire thing. You can’t help but laugh, which makes him laugh as well. He helps you bag all your groceries, and then you quickly make your way to the exit, both of you mumbling a quick “sorry” as you pass the worker.

“You really don’t have to carry all the groceries up.” you tell him, letting out a soft laugh as you watch him try to carry all your bags in his hands. He shakes his head with a grunt, standing in place as he waits for you to lead the way up to your apartment. 

“I got it, princess. I’m gonna carry them.” You sigh, shaking your head with a smile as you make your way up to your apartment, knowing he won’t let you take a bag even if you tried. Once you get to your front door, you unlock it, then turn to take the bags from him. He shakes his head, scoffing as he pushes past you and into your apartment.

“I can make it a few more steps. Look at me, I can handle it.” he teases you over his shoulder as he places the bags on your kitchen counter. He turns back to you, striding over to you with a smirk. You fight back a smile, shaking your head, and wrap your arms around his neck when he gets to you. 

“Thank you.” you say softly as you tilt your head to the side, keeping your eyes on him.

“I think I’m gonna need a better thank you than that, princess.” he murmurs as he leans down to meet your lips, putting his hands on your soft hips and pulling you flush against him.

You smile into the kiss, rising onto your toes so he doesn’t have to bend down as much and weaving one hand into the hair on the back of his head. He pushes you back against the counter, raising a hand to your jaw and tilting your head up to deepen the kiss. You moan softly as his tongue slips into your mouth and pushes himself harder against you.

You tilt your head back as his lips move down to your neck, nipping and sucking gently, which causes you to shiver. He lets out a soft chuckle as you react to him, feeling his jeans get tighter as he feels your plush belly and chest against his torso. You tense slightly as you feel his hard length against your stomach, and you pull back suddenly, feeling your nerves coming back.

“I have to put my groceries away.” you mumble in a daze, looking up at him through hooded eyes. He groans softly, giving you another quick kiss as he keeps you pressed against the counter.

“Come on. They can wait, can’t they?” he says in a teasing tone, licking his lips as he takes in your puffy lips and blown pupils.

“I have frozen stuff.” you trail off, looking towards the groceries. As much as you want to keep going, you can’t help the dread that’s filling every inch of your body. He’s so attractive, and he’s made it very clear that he’s experienced. Even though deep down you know it doesn’t really matter, you’re still a little worried about not being able to keep up. He senses your nervousness, and runs his thumb across your cheek to try to help ease your nerves.

“I guess I’ll let you do that.” he says in a low tone, giving you a small smile. His smile widens as he sees you smile back, then traces his fingers down from your cheek to your collarbone, his eyes following their path. “I’ll see you later?”

You nod, biting your lip. He must be getting a little frustrated with you, you think, but he never tries to push you any further, and you’re glad. He backs away from you begrudgingly, and your arms drop back down to your sides. He leans forward and gives you one last kiss with a hand placed softly on your cheek.

“Do you want me to walk you out?” He shakes his head, waving you off.

“Put your groceries away, princess. I’ll see you tomorrow.” he says, giving you a wink as he opens your front door, letting his eyes travel down your figure once more before he closes the door. 

You let out a sigh, turning to put your groceries away, glad your roommate isn’t here to witness this. She’s had enough fun teasing you about how nervous you get around him, and you really don’t want her to see it in person.

A few nights later, you’re sitting on the couch with your roommate, half watching a reality show she has on, when you get a text.

Evan: Wanna go for a drive?

You smile at your screen, replying to him quickly before you get up and go to your room to change. You put on a hoodie and some jean shorts, then go back into the living room, trying to fight the smile making its way onto your face as he replies.

Evan: I’ll be there in 15, princess.

“Where you going so late?” your roommate teases as she tears her eyes from the screen to look at you with a smirk. She already knows exactly who you’re going out with; she knows that look on your face.

“I’m going for a drive with Evan.” you say sheepishly, sitting back down in your spot as you wait for him, your eyes making their way to the tv. She raises a brow, her smirk widening. 

“Right, a drive. Okay.” she trails off, looking back over at the tv, the smirk not dropping from her face. Your eyes widen slightly at her words, and you snap your head over to face her. She laughs, seeing you out of the corner of her eye, and then turns to face you again as she rolls her eyes.

“It’s almost 10pm, you think he just means a drive?” she asks with a small laugh. You groan, tilting your head back against the couch, closing your eyes. You hadn’t even thought about that.

“You think he means a drive?” you ask, keeping your head tilted back against the couch. You feel your stomach fill with nerves again. She shrugs, and can’t help but laugh at how much you’re trying to avoid anything more than kissing Evan.

“Why don’t you just get it over with? It’s not like he’ll care.” You know she’s right, but everytime tensions rise, you start moving and speaking before you have time to think.

“I’m serious. It won’t be that bad. It’s not like he’s some random guy.” She tries to calm your nerves, and it helps a little. You nod, biting the inside of your cheek. She’s right, you think, you do know him. You’re filled with a burst of courage, thinking that maybe it would be best if you just got it over with. 

You’re torn from your thoughts when your phone vibrates, signaling that he’s here. You quickly make your way out the door and down to his jeep, groaning as you hear your roommate wish you luck before you close the door to your apartment.

You get into his jeep, greeting him with a smile. His eyes trail down your body, taking in your bare legs as he greets you. He starts driving once you’re settled, noticing that you’re fidgeting with your fingers, and reaches over to put a hand on your thigh. You look down at his hand, his thumb tracing along your thigh helping to calm your nerves a little bit.

“You’re gorgeous.” he says after a moment, glancing over at you from the corner of his eye, taking in how the streetlights illuminate your face. You fight back a smile, looking out your window.

“Where are we going?” you reply, trying to ignore the way your face is heating up. He shrugs, keeping his hand on your thigh as he keeps driving.

“Just wanted to see you. Thought we’d drive around.” You can’t help the smile that erupts on your face, replying with a soft “okay.”

He keeps driving further from the city, and you start to see less street lights and more trees, but he keeps going.

“Are you going to kill me?” you tease softly, turning to look over at him with a smile.

“You caught me. You’re the perfect target. I barely had to do anything to lure you out here.” he replies in the same tone, grabbing your hand and raising it to his lips, kissing the back of your hand gently.

“I won’t go down without a fight.” you tell him seriously, fighting back a smile as you turn in your seat to face him. He chuckles, rolling his eyes.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less, princess.” he tells you, winking at you quickly as he takes his eyes off the road for a second.

After a few more minutes, he pulls off onto a dirt road, driving for a minute until you come to a clearing. He turns off the car and looks over at you with a smile.

“So you are gonna kill me.” you tease, meeting his gaze. He shakes his head, chuckling.

“Come on, princess.” he tells you, getting out and quickly making his way around to your side and opening the door for you. He leads you to the front of the jeep and leans back onto the front bumper, pulling you between his legs and making you lean back against him, your back pressed against his chest. 

“What are we doing here?” you whisper, as if speaking any louder would disturb the calm night air surrounding you. He puts a finger under your chin and raises your gaze up to the sky, a soft gasp escaping your throat as you see the stars in the sky.

“You like it?” he asks you softly, his head also tilted up to take in the night sky. You nod, biting your lip as butterflies fill your stomach. You can’t believe this. You would’ve never guessed he would do something like this.

“My mom used to take me outside at night to see the stars when I couldn’t sleep.” you whisper, leaning your head back against his shoulder. He hums softly, smiling at your story.

“Do you know the stories about the constellations?” You turn your head to look back at him over your shoulder, your brows furrowed slightly.

“You know stories about the constellations?” you ask in slight disbelief. You already didn’t expect him to do this, and you really didn’t expect him to know the stories. He smiles at you, nodding.

“I got curious. Googled them one night.” he says sheepishly, and your smile widens. 

“You’re full of surprises, Buckley.” you tease, turning your head to look up at the sky again, resting your head back on his shoulder. He chuckles, humming softly.

“Well, you know Perseus? He killed Medusa, and saved Andromeda from a sea serpent with Medusa’s head?” You nod, humming softly. “Well, the Gods were so impressed by his accomplishments, they immortalized him in the stars. You see him up there?” He tries to describe it to you as he points in its direction, and you nod along with him, a big smile on your face. 

“Okay, and there’s two constellations called Ursa Major and Ursa Minor. Zeus fell in love with one of Artemis’ nymphs named Callisto. He got her pregnant, and when Artemis found out, she made Callisto leave her group. Then, Hera turned Callisto into a bear, because she was jealous. Then, years later, Callisto’s son became a hunter, and came across his mother as a bear. Zeus saw this, and intervened, placing them both in the sky as bears. Right up there.” he points up towards them, and you nod softly.

After a few more stories, you then lean away from him and turn to look at him over your shoulder again.

“You sure do know a lot.” you tease softly, a large smile across your face. You’re impressed. You didn’t think he’d know much about myths, let alone how they relate to the stars. He feels his face flush at your compliment, and he looks down for a moment. 

“Just google.” he murmurs before looking back up at you.

“My mom never told me about the stories.” you whisper, eyes trailing inspecting his face, taking in his features.

“Are you close with your mom?” he asks softly, squeezing your hips softly. You shrug, your smile fading slightly for a moment.

“I used to be. I’m not as close with her anymore. We never really see eye to eye, and she can’t hide her emotions when I do something with my life that she doesn’t want me to do. But, she’s still my mom.” He nods, studying your face as you explain, trying to learn more about your relationship with your mother than the vague answer you’re giving  him. “Are you close with your parents?” 

“Not really. I left as soon as I could. They were there, but, they were never really there.” You give him a sad smile as you nod. 

“I’m sorry.” you whisper, leaning in and giving him a soft kiss. He hums softly, kissing you back, putting a hand on your cheek.

“They’re good people. They’re just not good parents.” You nod, frowning slightly. You can’t believe that his parents barely have anything to do with him. You think he’s the best man you’ve ever met, and you can’t help the frustration flowing through you as you take in that they don’t see him the way you do.

“I think they’re missing out.” you tell him after a moment, your eyes still scanning his face. He can feel his heart swelling as your words hit his ears. He’s never thought of himself that way. He leans in again, meeting your lips in the most tender, dizzying kiss you think you’ve ever had. You turn in his arms, standing between his legs to face him once you break the kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck and hug his head to your chest.

He melts into your touch, a soft sound of happiness escaping his throat. He wraps his arms around your thick waist, nuzzling against your chest, which makes you laugh softly.

“Thank you for bringing me here.” you whisper after a few moments, and you feel him lean his head away from your chest and look up at you with a smile.

“Thanks for coming with me.” he replies in the same tone. “But, I should get you home. You have class in the morning.” he says a bit louder. His hands slide down to your hips and he guides you back a step or two before he stands up, towering over you. He leads you over to the passenger side and helps you in, then makes his way back over to the drivers side and turns the jeep around to head back to your apartment.

It’s silent almost the whole way back to your place as you both enjoy each other’s company. His hand has found its way back to your thigh, and the cool breeze coming in from the rolled down windows is helping cool down your warm skin. You feel so relaxed in his presence that you can feel your eyelids becoming heavy, and you spend most of the drive trying to keep your eyes open.

Once he pulls up in front of your building, he puts the car in park and looks over at you. His eyes soften as he takes in the way you’re fighting to keep your eyes open, and he feels a little bad for keeping you out so late, but he loves how adorable you look in your sleepy state.

“Come here.” he whispers after a moment, reaching out to place a hand on the back of your neck and pulling you towards him. You lips meet his over the center console, and one of your hands comes up to grab his wrist. He pulls back with a big grin on his face, seeing how your face has lit up by his actions.

“Go get some sleep, princess.” he says, his voice just above a whisper. You nod, turning and opening the door to get out of the jeep. Once you jump down, you turn to face him again.

“Text me when you get home.” you whisper, almost as a question, but he knows you mean it. He nods, his smile growing at the thought of you wanting him to get home safe.

“I promise. Now, go.” he tells you sternly. You nod, shutting the door and waving at him before you turn and walk inside, feeling his eyes on you until you disappear into the building. 

As you slowly walk inside, you can’t help but be a little disappointed. You had finally become okay with wanting more with him, but he really had just meant a drive. Nevertheless, you enjoyed spending time with him, and this is definitely something you never thought a man would actually do for you. You make your way up to your floor with a dazed smile on your face, glad to see that your roommate has already gone to bed once you make your way inside your apartment.

You fall asleep quickly once you get into bed, your thoughts on Evan, and how hard you’re starting to fall for him. You have a quick thought about what exactly you are, as you haven’t exactly had the talk with him yet, but you push it aside quickly. You’re happy with where you are right now, anyway. You’re definitely not seeing anyone else, and if this is how he treats women he’s not even dating, you think you’re okay with that, although you want more than anything to be with him for real.

next chapter

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[bloodlust-1]

.·:*¨ Night Affairs ¨*:·.

Astarion x fem Tav — Explicit 18+

Summary: Oops! Tav accidentally ate a mushroom that causes her to completely lose her mind. Astarion finds her in this state and enjoy each other’s company, A little too much.

T/W: smut!

Notes: this is Pre- Astarion telling Tav his feelings for her. Also, this takes place in the under dark! Happy reading~

Tav’s body felt a subtle change that began to take hold on her. At first, she felt a gentle warmth spreading through her veins, accompanied by a tingling sensation that danced across her skin. Colors seemed to intensify, becoming more vivid and vibrant with every passing moment. Gods, she was feeling the consequences of mistaking a mushroom for something safely edible. Damn it, these mushrooms in the under dark are all confusing to her. How was she supposed to know it’d make her delusional?

It was already time for everyone to settle in their tents. Tav would have been trying to catch some Z’s like everyone else, but As time passed, Tav’s perception of reality became distorted. The world around her transformed into a kaleidoscope of swirling patterns and shifting shapes. Sounds became amplified, echoing through her ears with an otherworldly clarity. Her senses were heightened to an extraordinary degree.

She wondered outside her tent, away from the camp unknowingly, and stumbled her way around the underdark. It was beautiful with its luminous plants of all kinds. Tav’s thoughts took on a dreamlike quality as her mind wandered through uncharted territories. She experienced a profound sense of euphoria and introspection, as if she had been granted access to hidden realms of consciousness. Time lost its meaning as minutes stretched into hours and hours into what felt like an eternity.

From a short distance sat Astarion, admiring the access he had to life again. He wouldn’t admit it, but he loved the adventure away from home no matter how much he missed Baldurs Gate. He was in deep thought about his situation until he heard dragging noises. He reached for his knife as he saw Tav, clumsily dragging her feet around. Her eyes were widened, almost sparkling from reflections from all the glow of the mushrooms. There was definitely something off about her.

Tav's eyes caught Astarion, by his lonesome in deep thought. She noticed his odd stare at her, "Oooh, Astarion! My favorite person in camp. Isn't it soOooOoo beautiful tonight?" She drunkenly plopped her body onto the ground, now sitting next to him.

Astarion's eyebrows crocked, and he noticed her pupils were dilated. "Oh dear, I see what's going on here. What did you eat?"

In this altered state, Tav's emotions fluctuated wildly. Waves of laughter washed over her as she found humor in the simplest things. Tears welled up in her eyes, not from sadness but from an overwhelming sense of beauty and interconnectedness with the world around her. "I didn't knoooow, please don't be mad at me. I just want to see the pretty plants tonight." Tav wiped away her unjustified tears, her mind was going insane. She could only cling to what little hold she had on reality.

Astarion tilted his head and stared at her. He was unable to take his eyes off her, often staring directly into her eyes or admiring her physical features. He adjusted his posture to face her. Admittingly, Astarion was already catching feelings for Tav the night they indulged in each other's bodies. It was just a part of his plan to manipulate her, something he knew how to do all too well. He just didn't expect to enjoy himself more than usual. It actually felt— good?

Astarion cleared his throat, "You must be losing your fucking mind. I bet anything we talk about now you won't even remember by tomorrow."

Tav slouched her head on his shoulder, her body twitching every so often, "I reaallyy don't want this to end. I lovE traveling w-with you guys, so much fun. I'm scared to go back home..." She spoke with slurs and all kinds of messiness. However, due to the fault of the mushroom she ate, the truth comes spilling out of her mouth uncontrollably.

Astarion perked up, "Scared? Darling what in the hells do you have to be scared of?" It wasn't like she had Cazador hovering over her shoulder. She couldn't possibly feel what he felt.

Tav's face ingrained with sadness. She clutched her trembling hands together, trying to steady herself. The fear that gripped her was suffocating, threatening to consume her entirely and the high didn't help her cope either. Home for her was anywhere but home. She wanted to run as far away as possible from this place that held nothing but darkness for her. "It's hard t-to talk about...You know that feeling that power someone has over you. It's hard to escape something that happened for soooo loonnngg." She rubbed her wide tired eyes. The area around her started to feel like it was melting with colors.

Astarion furrowed his brows, oddly, yes, he knew that feeling. But why did she know that feeling, "I do. But why—“

Tav cut Astarion off quickly, "I LOVE making bread. I have a hidden talent for it...Although now it isn't a secret anymore, so now you know." Tav cracked up a laugh, the little random bursts of confessions entertained her. It was hilarious to her. For no reason of course other than the mushroom effect.

"Uhh, right..." Astarion chuckled softly. She's ridiculous. It's actually entertaining to him how obliviously out of her mind she was. This was great blackmail fuel, or perhaps something he could poke fun at her for.

"Y-you are my favorite camp friend." She smiled goofily.

"Friend? What about our late-night tryst, Did you not enjoy yourself?" Astarion felt offended at her comment. Favorite, sure, but friend? This 'friend' comment did not fit into his plans. Although, lately he has been catching himself smiling at Tav more. He started to notice himself staring at her longer, maybe even lustfully? His heart raced whenever she got close to him, this was unfamiliar territory for Astarion. He leaned closer to her ear and whispered, "Would it make you happy to try again?"

"Oh! Yes, yes. Something in me tells me that'd make me very happy. But hold on! You dont reallyyy mean that do you?" Tav leaned away from him, and crossed her arms doubtfully.

"I— actually don't know. It doesn't really matter what I say now, you'll wake up tomorrow with not a zero clue." His mind wondered. Even if he confessed maybe having feelings for her, she would be oblivious. But it could also be a good moment to test the waters. If Astarion got a bad reaction from Tav, she'd forget all about it the next day. This could be an advantage for him.

"What if I told you you're incredible? That my plan to easily course you didn't work. That my master plan fell apart and every little thing we did together felt— meaningful…That in the midst of this mess I actually find myself caring for you?" He softly pushes away a strand of hair that swayed over Tav's face. His heart started to race to see her reaction.

To his surprise, Tav fell quiet and stared up at him. Her face flushed red and her eyes went a little watery. "You do..?" She spoke softly. Her breathing became heavy. Tav went and wrapped her arms around him in a warm and comforting embrace. The world around them seemed to fade away as they held each other tightly.

At that moment, all of Astarion's doubts melted away as he felt genuine affection and acceptance from Tav. He couldn’t believe that she reciprocated his feelings, and it filled him with an overwhelming sense of joy and relief. As they sat there embracing each other, time seemed to stand still.

The hug spoke volumes without the need for words. It conveyed a deep connection between them, finally acknowledging their feelings for each other. It was a moment of vulnerability and trust, where they could let down their guards and allow themselves to be open to the possibility of love. After all, Tav was Astarion's first consensual sex affair where he didn't worry about Cazador. He could not ever imagine taking her to him. She actually made Astarion feel love. This made him only want to protect her from any harm.

"I promise I'll make this sound better when you're not out of your damn mind." Astarion held her close. It was such a refreshing feeling to love someone instead of loathing someone. He felt the heat of his cheeks flush, and Tav tugged on his sleeve.

"C-Can I kiss you, Astarion?" The way she looked at him with those eyes of hers. Big, full of lust. He saw this same look the night they had sex.

He chuckled cockily, "You couldn't help yourself? I would like that." No one ever asked for his permission, it was admired greatly by him. His lips covered hers in a swift motion, and a soft smooch was placed on her lower lip. Her skin was so warm compared to his, and it only made him yearn more for that warmth.

There they were, in an atmosphere lushed with glowing plants as they held each other tightly in its nature. They kissed each other until it got sloppy, their breaths going in haste. Astarion pushed his body over hers, forcing her back onto the soft moss.

Astarion gazed down at Tav. It took him back to that night, how beautiful she looked under the moonlight, and how beautiful she still looked now. He felt lucky to have met such a beauty, she had a charm he only saw from royalty. The kind that has people swooning over her hand, begging to make her their beloved. Not many people could say they bestowed these kinds of looks.

"Astarion?" a whisper left her lips, cutely yet— begging. Her eyes averted from his and she felt her body tense. No mushroom could mask her lust for Astarion's touch, it was written all over her face. Her little trembles of excitement gave it away.

"Just say the words, love. You know I can give you all the pleasures, Your wish is my command." His hands traveled up and down her thigh, caressing her skin tenderly.

Tav nodded as a shiver ran up her spine from his touch. She spoke with a soft tone, one that begged for him tenderly, "I need your touch."

"As do I." He hovered over her small stature, placing his lips gently on hers. A soft kiss it was. It was different from their last kiss because that one was just lust. This kiss had a heart in it, so naturally it felt so much better. Especially when the warmth of her blood heated his cold lips.

Astarion shut his eyes tightly, and a tingle ran up his spine. The passion from the kiss scrambled his mind because why did love feel this good? Love never felt good. Cazador claimed all of his spawns were a family, something to love. That was no love. But Tav, however, felt completely different. Even regular sex felt amazing, which was also just bland for him.

Astarion kissed her lips until they couldn't no more. Both gasped for air as their adrenaline ran threw their bodies. Astarion's shaft pushed hard into the seam of his pants, and it poked her inner thigh. He then adjusted himself so that he wasn't poking at Tav anymore.

"I want to save that for later, my dear. A day when you can wake up and remember it. So you can come to me in the morning with flushed cheeks and a racing heart." Astarion didn't want to sour a moment where he could make love and not just have sex. He'd rather wait for Tav to be completely aware of herself.

Tav nodded in agreement. Her body felt like she was floating on a cloud. Her high still clouded her mind, and her body still yearned for him. "Could you suppose still spoil me...?"

His eyebrows raised in surprise. "Cheeky aren't we?" His hand raced down her curves, exploring the warmth of her skin, "I suppose I can, pet." Without a thought, Astarion swiftly tugged down Tav's pants. He pulled her legs apart so that her core was to full access to him.

His lips planted kisses all over her neck. The heat of his rough breaths hit Tav's skin, causing her goosebumps to crawl all over. All the while Astarion's hand was caressing over her folds. His fingers moistened as it stroked over her slit. Tav let out small moans as his fingers rubbed her clit. His motions were skilled, almost like a second nature to him.

“M-mphh…” Tav clutched onto the cloth of his shirt. His kisses grazed over her neck tenderly, and he nibbled on the lobe of her ear, “How does that feel?” He spoke in a breathy tone.

“Amazing.” She purred. Her legs twitched from Astarion’s touch. She became sensitive and more wet as he circled around her clit. He seemed pleased with the performance Tav was giving, the moans were a validation for him. But he wanted feel more of her.

With two fingers, he slipped it into her entrance. Tav gasped out of pleasure, the feeling was all too much and she spreader her legs more for him. He bucked his hand in and out of her. The warmth of her walls encased around his fingers, begging for more.

Tav cupped Astarion’s face, pulling him into a kiss that was muffled between her moans. His tongue danced with hers, a sweet taste he’s been thinking about the day they first kissed. Her back arched for him more, and it was granted, a third finger slipped into her and she pulled away from the kiss. A pleasurable wince left her lips and Astarion looked at her with red piercing eyes. He enjoyed watching her crumble under him. It made him feel powerful.

Tav’s head hung back as moans and groans left her mouth like a lyric to a song only Astarion could produce. Her wet core made it easier for him to fuck her with his fingers fast and swiftly. His arm burned as it continuously fucked her, he didn’t break his motion while beads of sweat formed on his temples.

Astarion suddenly lowered his head, he kept his fingers in her, and now his tongue was over her clit. His saliva trailed down between her inner thighs as her moans grew more intense. Her hand gripped a chunk of his hair, forcing his face closer into her core.

His tongue played with her clit, rubbing it in circles as his fingers thrusted in and out of her. An intensity swelled in her lower stomach, she gripped Astarion hair tighter as her finish comes to a near.

“F-fuck! Ahh— S-starion..” her back arched more and more against his face, like a two magnets attracting each other. His steamy breath huffed against her sex, awarding him with more groans. It was absolute bliss for Astarion. It was his first time spoiling someone like this. It felt so intimate and so passionate. If this is what sex felt like with a lover, he wanted to do it over and over again.

Tav yelled out a final moan of pleasure before releasing onto Astarion’s face. His tongue dragged along her folds, licking up any wetness he could as if he was drinking blood. He kissed her moistened core, he then picked up his head from between her legs.

Astarion used the back of his hand to wipe the cum off his mouth, his eye contact was like daggers. “Mmm…That taste of yours. It’s amazing.” He wrapped his fingers around the band of her pants, and pulled them up. Cleaning her up was a love language for him. To destroy someone sexually and then cleaning up the mess he caused, it was so liberating. Especially since it was Tav.

Tav sat up, her skin moistened red on her cheeks, “you’re too good at that. Do it again.” Tav teased him. She liked to have fun with Astarion even at the most tense of times.

“Cheeky pup. You might get tired of me if I keep spoiling you like this, however I couldn’t imagine ever getting bored of that taste of yours. You’re magnificent.” His finger stroked the side of her face softly. “Shall we get some rest? You’ll be needing it tomorrow when you’re sore.”

💤

The next morning Tav woke up with an aching head and also…a soreness between her legs? She brushed off the feeling and greeted her fellow camp members. Gods was she never touching another mushroom ever again. She pretty much went blank but she remembered a faint memory of Astarion face. But, she couldn’t tell if it was a wet dream or not.

She yawned and went to stroll around the camp to chat. When she made her rounds to Astarion he flashed her a welcoming smile, waaay nicer than he usually was, “Well look who we have here. How’d you sleep my dear?”

Tav pleasantly nodded her head to his kind words. “It was strange…but much needed. How did you sleep?”

“Wonderful. I wanted to say thank you for last night. It was…an experience I won’t forget.” He clicked his tongue softly. His face was smug and he walked away from Tav, who fell silent.

Her heart dropped in her chest and it all clicked together. The soreness, the stickiness she felt in her pants, and Astarion being extra nice. A moment she had alone with him and she could barely remember what was said. Tav was mentally cursing herself in her head. She was very fond of him and honestly, she wanted to figure out their dynamic. Only Astarion could tell the tale of their late night affair, but for now, Tav wondered all about her wet dream. Or so she thought.

Any thoughts? Comment 👇🏼 I love to engage !

[stevie-petey]

episode two: the weirdo on maple street

Trying to ease the awkwardness, you hold up a poster and offer it to them, but Steve snatches it from your grasp. “Henderson, didn’t know you were also a little know-it-all. Why don’t you share your review sheet with the rest of us?” He says, casting a teasing look your way. It isn’t until he inspects the piece of paper that he finally notices that it’s a missing poster for a child, not a review sheet. “Oh, shit. I’m so sorry.” You snatch the poster back from him. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

summary: you use your limited psych knowledge to help a bald girl, you force jonathan to accept $20 and he's later an ass to you, steve doesn't know what a "missing" poster looks like, and it's really hard being a single mother to now four kids.

rating: general, but there's cursing as usual and steve being... well, steve - but hes still season 1 steve so give him some time

warnings: cursing, fem!reader, use of y/n, and there's more angst in this chapter with some fighting between reader and jonathan, so fair warning.

words: 10.1k (the longest thing ive ever written)

before you swing in: i'm almost done with chapter 4, so here's a sweet treat as i cram for exams lmao. some housekeeping: should i do a tag list ? i got a few questions about it, so pls let me know soldiers. also, i feel the need to clarify that i adore nancy but for plot reasons - reader and her don't really get along (but they def will later, trust me). season 1 nancy and steve are just so silly. anyways, i hope y'all enjoy this loooong chapter. the rest definitely aren't as lengthy due to plot, but wow. i amazed myself. carry on !

-

Your jeans drip onto the Wheeler’s carpet, and you’ve definitely left a wet imprint on the couch cushion beneath you. The other boys are dripping as well, but all their attention is on the girl in front of them. 

After finding her in the woods, your motherly instincts kicked in, immediately removing your coat to place on her and gently ushering her to your bike and demanding that the boys go back to Mike’s. Your mom is home, so your house was out of the question, and it’s always been easy sneaking into the Wheeler’s, anyways. 

Once you all had made it back, you guided the girl onto the couch and sat next to her. You refuse to let her go too far from you, having no idea where she came from or why, but regardless you know she’s too young for any of it to have been good. 

Which leads you to now: wearily watching the boys stare at the girl as if she’s some science experiment, asking her a million questions a second.

Bless them and their little prepubescent minds. 

Lucas reaches out to touch her, and before you can nudge him away, Mike slaps at his hand. “Stop it! You’re freaking her out!”

“She’s freaking me out!” Lucas retaliates, which honestly? That’s fair. The girl hasn’t said anything yet, even after your multiple attempts to get her to do so. No matter how much you try, you can’t coax a response out of her. 

“I bet she’s deaf.” Your brother offers, suddenly clapping his hands to scare her, making both you and her flinch. “Not deaf…”

You roll your eyes at him. “Guys, she’s probably just really scared right now. We should give her some space,” you look at both Lucas and Dustin, “and time,” now you look at Mike. The three boys deflate a bit. 

“She’s probably cold,” Mike says after a moment of silence, and you nod at his suggestion. Seeing your agreement, he walks over to a basket of clothes and takes out some pajamas.

While Mike is away, thunder rumbles and the girl jumps, unconsciously getting closer to you. You wrap an arm around her reassuringly, making note that she doesn’t like loud noises. If anything, she’s showing more and more signs of trauma response, which makes you uneasy. You remember Hopper saying something about Will being in danger. What are the odds that this little girl was running from something as well?

“Here, these are clean.” Mike’s return breaks you from your thoughts, and you take the clothes from him and stand up. You thank him, then offer your hand to the girl. She looks at you uncertainly. 

“It’s okay,” you reassure her. “Let’s go get you dressed in some warm clothes. I’m right here, sweetheart.” 

“She’s super nice.” Dustin says, trying to help.

Lucas adds, “Yeah, you can trust her.” 

“She’s alright.” Is all Mike offers.

You give them all an appreciative smile, even if Mike is being a bit of an ass, and then you feel a small, cold hand wrap around yours. The girl stands up, looking around shyly, and you lead her to the bathroom. When you go to close the door, she stops you.

Mike has followed, seeing the interaction. “You don’t want it closed?”

Her voice is quiet, solemn. “No,”

You and Mike look at each other, and he voices what you’re thinking. “So you can speak.”

He looks excited about this new information, and you shove his head out of the doorway. She needs to get dressed. “We’ll leave the door cracked, okay?”

She nods at you, and you stand guard outside the door. It’s not that you don’t trust the boys, but Mike has only known her for ten minutes and he’s already been nicer to her than you’ve ever seen him with anyone else. The only other person he’s this soft spoken to is Will, so you’re protective of her. 

You can hear the boys discussing tonight’s events from the living area while the girl gets dressed. They sound scared, and a part of you can’t blame them. While you’re fairly certain that the girl isn’t dangerous, it’s still a creepy situation. Once again, Hopper’s new theory surrounding Will floats through your mind. This all can’t be some coincidence. 

Sighing, you approach the boys and catch a bit of the conversation. 

“Our houses become Alcatraz.” You hear Lucas saying, and you figure they’ve finally pieced together that there’s no way any of you can tell anyone about the girl. None of you were supposed to be out tonight. As much as you know you should tell an adult, you also need to be able to help Jonathan with finding Will. If your mom locks the house down, you’re doomed. 

“Lucas is right,” the boys turn to you. “We can’t go to anyone about this just yet, but I also don’t think it’s a good idea to hide her. She’s been through something terrible, it’s obvious. Tonight, I say she gets some rest. We can figure out what to do later.” 

Mike nods, for once agreeing wholeheartedly with you. “She’ll sleep here tonight-”

Dustin’s eyes widen in horror, “You’re letting a girl-”

You clamp your hand over his mouth, motioning for Mike to continue.

“Thanks, Y/N. In the morning, she sneaks around my house, goes to the front door and rings my doorbell. My mom will answer and know exactly what to do. She’ll send her back to Pennhurst,”

They think she’s from Pennhurst? You think, but don’t verbalize it.

“Or wherever she comes from. We’ll be totally in the clear! And tomorrow night, we go back out, and this time we find Will.”

You gotta hand it to Mike Wheeler, he may be a pain in the ass, but he’s a smart pain in the ass. The plan is pretty sound, so long as he follows through with it. However, it’s him following through with it that leaves you a bit unsure. 

He looks at you for approval, and you hesitantly nod. “It’s a pretty good plan, Wheeler. So long as you stick to it.” 

Lucas and Dustin nod along with you, there’s an unspoken sense of doubt that Mike will actually be able to turn the girl over to his mom. Then she walks out, dressed now in some of Nancy’s old clothes. She draws into herself when you all turn to her, shy. You walk over and offer your hand again, which she accepts. 

“Mike, go find her something to sleep on. Dustin, we gotta go soon before mom notices we’re gone.”

Both boys comply, with Mike searching for a sleeping bag and Dustin packing up his stuff. You crouch down next to the girl, so that you’re face to face, and give her a warm smile. “It was lovely meeting you. My name is Y/N, I hope Mike over there doesn’t give you a hard time tonight.” 

Mike flips you off, having heard you. “If he’s annoying,” you lean in close to her now, whispering in her ear. “You have my permission to pinch him.”

The girl giggles, finally relaxing a bit, and you warm with pride. She’ll be okay, she seems like a very resilient girl and you’ll oddly miss her. 

The two other boys are waiting for you upstairs. You all wish Mrs. Wheeler a good night and head out. Thankfully the rain has now stopped, so the bike ride home isn’t bad. You stop at Lucas’ turn to make sure he gets home safely before finally arriving at your place. As Dustin begins pedaling into your driveway, you don’t follow. 

“I’m going to go see Jonathan, he didn’t answer my calls earlier and I just…”

Dustin waves at you, not even bothering to turn around. “Yeah yeah, go see your boyfriend. If mom asks, you’re asleep.” 

“He’s not my boyfriend-”

“Are you seriously going to argue with me after I offered to cover for you?”

Your brother gives you a pointed look, and you know he’s right. “Touche.” 

Dustin goes to leave, but you quickly grab at his jacket. “Before I forget, swear to me that you’ll keep me updated if anything weird happens, okay?”

He nods at you, knowing better than to argue, and gives you a mock salute as he heads inside. 

The living room light is on when you arrive at the Byers home, despite the late hour, but you aren’t surprised. You knock on the door and wait. When no one comes, you knock again, a bit louder this time. After another few moments, the door swings open. 

Jonathan has a finger over his lips in a shushing manner, motioning to Joyce who is passed out on the couch. You nod, letting him know you understand. The two of you go to his room and when he closes the door, you finally get a good look at him. He looks worse than he did earlier, the bags under his eyes have somehow gotten darker. His hair is a mess, his eyes bloodshot. 

“You’re soaked.” Jonathan says. 

“Yeah,” he doesn’t want to talk about it yet, so you play along. “Got caught in the rain. Are some of my spare clothes still in your bottom drawer?”

He nods at you, going over and grabbing a t-shirt and pajama pants for you. You accept them gratefully and excuse yourself to the bathroom to change. Your bones are cold, the rain seemingly having penetrated the layers of your skin. In the mirror you see that your own eyes are bloodshot; you don’t look much better than Jonathan, really.

When you return Jonathan is sitting on his bed, so you join him. It’s silent between you, all you can hear is his breathing. You stare straight ahead, so does he, and you wait. You’ve only seen Jonathan like this a handful of times, where the stress and anxiety becomes too much for him. He shuts down, draws into himself, and all you can do is wait for him to return to you; he always does. 

“Mom got a call tonight.” Jonathan’s voice is hoarse, and he looks frail. You wonder if he ever did end up making the spaghetti you prepared for him.

“Who was it?”

He swallows heavily, taking a moment to respond. “She said it was Will.”

“Will?” You look at him now, searching for any signs on his face, his voice lacks emotion. By the way he stares blankly ahead, as if he’s not really present with you right now, you know that it hadn’t been Will on the other end. 

“She started freaking out, going ballistic,” his voice cracks a bit, so you take a chance and reach for his hand. He lets you take it, giving you a squeeze, before continuing. “She was screaming, begging whoever it was to give Will back.” 

Jonathan pauses again. You don’t say anything, because no words will help. He’s never been the type for comforting words, anyways. He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes. “It wasn’t him. Lightning struck and our phone got charred. It wasn’t Will.”

Now it’s your turn to squeeze Jonathan’s hand. He doesn’t deserve any of this. None of the Byers do. Out of the entire town, they’re the family who deserves the most that life can give. Will, too good. Jonathan, too selfless. Joyce, too loving. They’re the best damn people you know. 

“I tried calming her down, but she was hysterical. She’s only asleep right now because she worked herself up too much and passed out. I’m worried she-'' Jonathan shakes his head, as if ashamed by his own words. “I’m worried she’s going crazy, Y/N.”

He’s quiet again, but you can tell he’s about to break. His knee is now bouncing up and down and his breathing has become slightly ragged. Everything from today has been building up, it was only a matter of time before he snapped. You’re also worried about Joyce, a part of you skeptical to believe her, but the little girl you found tonight in the rain? Something was definitely weird about Will’s disappearance, but you’re hesitant to tell Jonathan just yet. For all you know, she could’ve simply been a girl who got lost and will be returned to her family tomorrow. 

You don’t want to worry Jonathan any more than you need to.

“I should’ve been there for him. I shouldn’t have taken that shift.” He gasps out, and like a dam the tears begin to fall. You’re quick to pull him into a hug and he crumbles into you. His body shakes with violent sobs and he clutches at you as if afraid you’ll leave.

“You can’t blame yourself.” You whisper, stroking a hand through his hair. He cries even harder, the force of it almost enough to knock you over, so you situate yourself so that you’re fully on the bed, laying against his pillows, with Jonathan crying into your chest beside you. 

“He’s g-gone.”

“We’ll find him, I promise.” Your own tears threaten to come out, but you force them down. You have to be here for him, he needs you. The only other time Jonathan has so openly cried was when Lonnie left years ago. He’s been holding everything in since then, all those years of looking after his family, taking care of his brother, getting harassed by assholes like Tommy Hagan. 

Neither of you say anything else, and you know that Jonathan needs to let it all out. You soothe him as best as you can, running a hand through his hair, stroking his back, reassuring him over and over again that none of this is his fault until your own voice becomes hoarse. You don’t know how long you stay like this, but sometime during the night Jonathan finally falls asleep, and you follow shortly after him. 

— 

Sunlight streams through Jonathan’s spare bed sheet that he’s pinned over his window, serving as a makeshift curtain, waking you up. You stretch, careful not to wake the boy beside you, and crawl out of the bed. You’re antsy, already knowing that today will be another long day. After grabbing some clothes from your designated drawer and getting dressed, you head into the kitchen and start making a quick breakfast. Just as you’re finishing up, Jonathan comes out of his room, dressed and ready for the day.

Neither of you say anything about the night prior, instead silently working around each other in the kitchen with years of practiced ease. He hands you the salt shaker right when you need it, you grab the pieces of toast that he popped into the toaster, the two of you never once get in each other’s way. You get deja vu, remembering all the times you’ve slept over with Dustin, you and Jonathan making the boys breakfast while they slept in. 

The only indication that last night really happened is a forehead kiss from Jonathan, his lips soft against your head. Out of the two of you, you’re definitely the touchy one, so it’s always a nice surprise when he initiates the touch, and his forehead kisses were a welcome rarity. 

When the plates have been made, Joyce gets up from the couch and stumbles over to the table. You quickly help her sit down, and for the first time since Will’s disappearance you’re able to really look at her. She looks like Jonathan, only worse. The bags under her eyes are darker, her hair is more matted, and you believe she’s still wearing the same shirt you saw her in the night that Will went missing. 

“All right, mom. Breakfast is ready.” Jonathan tries to place her plate on the table, but Joyce stops him, worried about the poster of Will. 

Jonathan gives you a look and you run over to the table, grabbing the poster so that he can set the plate down. 

Joyce gives you a tired smile, “Thank you, Y/N, but I can’t eat.”

“I just need you to eat, mom.” 

“Jonathan’s right, Mrs. Byers. You need to eat, we gotta keep your strength up.” You feel like you’re talking to a child, but in a way, you suppose you are. 

The woman lights a cigarette instead, and faintly you wonder how many she’s had within the last 48 hours; you’ll need to wash your clothes when you get home. She begins to ask Jonathan to go to Xerox to make as many copies of Will’s poster as possible. You sit down in front of her, silently eating, knowing there’s no place for you in this conversation. 

It’s not that the Byers are ashamed that they have little money, but you know it’s rude to listen in. They make do with what they have, and Jonathan has never felt embarrassed with you knowing it. 

“I don’t want you to go alone,” Joyce says, causing you to speak up. 

“I’ll go with him and help hang them up, it’s no problem.” 

Jonathan turns to you. “You have that chem test, remember? I’m not letting you miss that.” 

“Shit…” you bury your face into your hands. You completely forgot about that after finding the little girl last night and dealing with Jonathan. You’ve heard about how impossible the chem exams were, and science has never been your best subject. That was Dustin’s thing, your thing was more humanities. 

“You’re the smartest person I know, you’ll ace the exam,” Jonathan reassures you before turning to his mom. “And I’ll handle the posters, it’s okay.” 

Joyce has been lost in thought during your conversation with her son, only beginning to speak again when she’s asked how many copies will be efficient. Once she starts speaking again, it’s almost like she’s physically unable to stop. She begins to ramble, finally exposing the crumbling woman that you’ve only heard about, now understanding Jonathan’s fears for her. 

“Mom-”

“If we… ten cents-”

“Mom!” Jonathan raises his voice a bit, now grabbing at his mother’s hand. “You can’t get like this, okay?”

The look on Joyce’s face kills you. She looks so lost, ashamed of her behavior, and you cast your head down; this is a private matter. Joyce profusely apologizes to him and all Jonathan can do is gently reassure her that it’s okay. All of this is okay. 

Their tender moment is interrupted by knocking on the front door, revealing Hopper on the other side. His presence makes you uneasy, so you stay in the kitchen and begin to clean up with Jonathan while Joyce attacks him with questions. 

“A little bit of trust here, alright? We’ve been searching all night.” You hear the cop say. Your hand clenches the sponge, rubbing a bit harder at the plate you’re cleaning. If they’ve been searching all night, why are they here now?

“Went all the way to Cartersville.” Ever since Will disappeared, you’ve been building a wall of hope within you that he’ll be found safe and sound. However, with every passing day, with every new situation that occurs, you can feel a piece of the wall collapse. You can feel it now; the search party went all the way to Cartersville.

“And?” Joyce asks. 

“Nothing.” The cry that Joyce lets out causes you to drop the plate you’ve been cleaning, shattering on the floor. You curse, immediately bending down to pick up the pieces. Luckily it didn’t shatter into a million bits, but you still feel horrible for breaking one of their dishes. 

Jonathan bends down as well to help, and the commotion catches Hopper’s attention. He sees you scrambling to clean up the mess and sighs with annoyance. “Does she live here or something?” 

You and Jonathan look at each other, a slight smile on your faces, and only respond to Hopper with a synchronized shrug. You basically do live at the Byers’ at this point, you have been for years now. It was the same for Jonathan: if you weren’t at his house, he was at yours. 

Joyce wipes some of her tears away. “Y/N is family, she’s here to help.” 

Hopper ignores this, instead bringing up the phone call from the night before. Joyce leads him over to the phone, and you join them once you’ve collected the remaining pieces of broken glass. When you see the phone, you can’t help but gasp. Jonathan’s words from last night are accurate, the phone is charred. 

“Storm barbecued this pretty good.” Hopper says.

Joyce waves her arms out, disbelieving. “The storm? You’re saying that that’s not… weird?”

“No, it’s weird.” Hopper begins, but you cut him off. 

“It’s really weird.”

He glares at you. You mumble a quick sorry and back away a bit while Jonathan asks if the call can be traced. Hopper focuses back on the situation at hand, informing him that it isn’t possible and then questions if Joyce even heard Will in the first place. The question makes you cringe, knowing it’ll only make Joyce more agitated and hurt.

“Flo said you just heard some breathing.” 

It’s the way he phrases the question, the way he emphasizes the word “just”, that bothers you. This woman has just lost her kid, what kind of mother wouldn’t know her own child’s breathing?

“Even if it was ‘just’ some breathing, I’d know it was my brother. Will is her son, she’d know better than anyone.” You find yourself saying. The words weren’t meant to leave your mouth, but the appreciative look Joyce casts your way outweighs the fear from Hopper’s glare. 

“It was him. It was Will, and he was scared. Then something-”

“It was probably just a prank call,” Hopper tries to reason with her, causing you to roll your eyes at him. You respect the guy, you do, but could he at least attempt to listen to Joyce?

You excuse yourself before you say anything else, heading back into the kitchen to collect the two posters you and Jonathan made. While the others talk, you grab his things and pack his bag for him. You know he’ll probably skip school today to get the copies done in time, maybe keep an eye on his mom, so you make a mental note to inform him later that you’ll help with putting the fliers up the second you’re done with the exam. He needs someone there for him. 

When you’ve grabbed the last of Jonathan’s things, Lonnie’s name is mentioned. You freeze, standing right outside the hall from them, only a wall between you. If Lonnie is somehow involved in this, you’ll kill him yourself. He was always cruel to Will, even when you were around to witness it. You hate him more than anything in this damn world. 

“It’s been long enough, I’m having him checked out.” Hopper declares, storming out of the house. 

You count to three in your head, and the second you get to three, Jonathan is following after Hopper. You knew he would, hating his father the most out of everyone who has had the displeasure of meeting him. You follow behind him, heading outside to talk to the Chief. 

“Hey, Hopper. Let me go.” 

Hopper takes a drag from his cigarette, facing the two of you. “I’m sorry?”

“To Lonnie’s,” Jonathan says, looking at you for backup.

You do your best to try. “If Will’s there, that means he probably ran away. Cops will scare the poor boy, he’ll think he’s in trouble.”

“And he’ll hide. He’s good at hiding.” Jonathan finishes for you. 

Hopper stares at you both, inhaling more smoke from his cigarette and blowing it in your direction with a curious look in his eyes. “You two are sickening to be near, you know that?”

You and Jonathan share an annoyed look. A kid is missing, and you still have to clarify that you aren’t together? “It’s not like that,” Jonathan says.

“Sure, you know cops are good at detecting lies,” Hopper approaches him now, grabbing his shoulders. For a brief second you’re afraid he’ll hurt him. “And we’re also good at finding, okay? Stay here with your mom. She needs you.” 

Hopper punches at Jonathan’s shoulder before facing you. “And you,” you brace for whatever he’s about to say, knowing you probably aren’t his favorite person at the moment. He points at Jonathan, “He needs you.”

His words hang in the air several minutes after he’s gone. You glance at Jonathan, but he doesn’t meet your eye and instead he goes back inside. You sigh, following after him because it’s what you do. Hopper’s right, he needs you. 

Jonathan’s in the living room, speaking softly to his mom when you enter. You don’t disturb them but rather snatch Jonathan’s keys from the counter and wait for him by the door. Like Joyce said, Xerox opens in about thirty minutes and you have a chem exam to take. If you leave now, you’ll be able to make the copies with him and be back in time before school.

The ride to Xerox is tense, you know Jonathan is upset that he’s been sidelined by Hopper. You also know that he’s torn between wanting to help his mom and staying out of his house as much as possible. If it weren’t for your god damn chem test you’d offer to skip and hide out at your place, but you can’t. Jonathan wouldn’t let you risk your future for him (even though you would, in a heartbeat, a million times over). 

The man at Xerox gives Jonathan a look of pity, clearly recognizing Will’s picture on the poster. It’s your favorite photo of him, smiling with all his teeth and happy as can be. From what you’ve heard, the whole town has been conducting search parties for him. Jonathan ignores the look and asks for the 200 copies to be made. 

It’s just you and him in the store as you wait for the prints to be done. The guy said it’d be about a ten minute wait so you wander around the store. Jonathan clearly is in a no talking mood, so you occupy yourself with whatever you find. You wish you’d brought your backpack to Jonathan’s last night so you could at least study a bit while waiting, but you didn’t. It’d be a miracle if you pass this exam. 

Jonathan wanders around as well, so you give a quick look around and find the employee. He’s standing over the printer when you approach. “I’d like to pay for the copies, please.”

“You can pay after they’re done-”

“No, I can’t let him see,” you point over to Jonathan, who is now looking at some stationary. “Please, just let me pay now so he can yell at me later.” 

The guy gives you a shrug, clearly not getting paid enough to care. “Okay, it’ll be $20. Just leave the money on the counter over there, the prints should be done soon.” 

You nod and do as you’re told, leaving the $20 bill on the counter while Jonathan isn’t looking. He can kill you later, right now you want to make up for not being able to help with hanging them up. There’s literally hundreds to get through, he can’t do that all alone. 

When the posters are done and Jonathan collects them, you wish the worker a good day and then wrap your arms around him and use all your strength to drag your friend into the car. He doesn't fight back at first, too confused by your actions, and you’re almost out the door before he sees the man pocket the money and wave at you. The dots connect in his head and Jonathan begins to fight against you. 

“Y/N, let me pay-”

“Nope. Not happening!”

“We both know I’m stronger-”

“Debatable, honestly, seeing as how we’re almost to your car.”

“Let go!” He tugs harshly as his arm, which you’ve got a secure hold on, causing you to stumble a bit. 

You plant your feet more firmly against the ground and use all your weight to pull the boy forward. You’re a few feet away from the car, just one more solid pull should do the trick. “Stop fighting this, Byers. I’ve already paid-”

“Which you shouldn’t have!”

“Keep fighting and drop all the posters, I dare you.”

Jonathan looks down at the posters in his spare hand, realizing that you’re right. If he doesn’t give in soon, they’ll topple over. He lets out an agitated groan, throwing his head back, and then marches over to the car to unlock it and fling himself into the driver’s seat. “Just get in.” 

You do a small victory dance and hop in the car.

“I hate you.” 

“You love me.” 

He hesitates only for a moment. “God, I hate that I do.” 

You smile, buckling your seatbelt. Jonathan pulls out of the parking lot and begins the drive to school. He’s less tense this time, at least. The small little wrestling match between the two of you seemingly did some good, then. 

When you pull up to school, you once again apologize to Jonathan for being unable to help. He waves you off, understanding. 

“It’s okay, I promise. I can’t have you failing out of high school because of me.”

You roll your eyes. “One test won’t make me become a high school dropout, Jonathan.”

He ruffles your hair, which you slap him for. “You can join me after, okay? Good luck, bug.” 

“Fine, but I’m taking some posters with me so I can hang up on my way to my locker.” 

“Deal.”

You run to your locker, flinging it open and letting out a sigh of relief when you spot your chem cards. Honestly, you really should’ve prepared better for your little sleepover at the Byers. You glance at the watch on your wrist, noting that you have roughly fifteen minutes to memorize all the elements in the periodic table as well as some chemistry definitions. 

Just peachy. 

You tie your hair up so you can focus better and grab the note cards. If you review the cards as you walk to class, you can save at least three minutes of studying time. You tuck the few remaining posters of Will under your arm and begin to head to your class, getting absorbed in all the elements and words. As you’re skimming a card about protein being K, you run into Nancy and Barb, who also seem to have the same idea as you.

“Oh, hey Y/N.” Nancy greets you, Barb waving to you as well. 

They’re being nice, so you try to make conversation. “Studying for Kaminsky’s test?”

They nod at you and Nancy sighs, “Yeah, his exams are the worst.”

You laugh a bit, for once on the same page as her. “I know. I spent last night at Jonathan’s, I completely forgot about the test until this morning. I’m screwed.”

Barb raises her eyebrows at you while Nancy suddenly looks sad. “Oh, I’m sorry about Will. I know you and him are close.” 

“Yeah, it must be hard taking care of Jonathan right now.” Barb voices. 

You give them both an awkward smile. “Thanks, I guess? It’s just, there’s still hope, so…” 

The three of you stand there as your voice trails off. It’s painfully awkward. While you’ve known Nancy since you were 12, and at some point you even called her a close friend of yours, the second you entered high school she became distant. You never blamed her for it, people simply grow up and grow apart. Now you only ever interact with her if it concerns the boys. 

Trying to ease the awkwardness, you hold up a poster and offer it to them, but Steve snatches it from your grasp.

“Henderson, didn’t know you were also a little know-it-all. Why don’t you share your cheat sheet with the rest of us?” He says, casting a teasing look your way. It isn’t until he inspects the piece of paper that he finally notices that it’s a missing poster for a child, not a review sheet. “Oh, shit. I’m so sorry.”

You snatch the poster back from him. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.”

His friends laugh, but Steve has a bit of heart to look guilty, so you count that as something. His shame doesn’t last long though and the goofy and sweet boy who made sure you were okay after almost hitting you with his car is gone. 

Steve plays off the situation as if it were nothing. “Let me make it up to you, Henderson. I know you’re probably stressed out of your mind dealing with boyfriend troubles because of Bill-”

“His name is Will,” you grit out, remembering now why you dislike Steve so much. Everything was about impressing his friends, and while you can sympathize with him, it doesn’t give him an excuse to be an asshole. 

“Right, Will. Anyways, I was just about to inform Nance over here that my dad has left town on a conference and my mom’s gone with him, ‘cause, ya know, she doesn’t trust him.” 

“Good call,” Tommy says, and you glare at him. 

Steve carries on. “So, are you guys in?”

“In for what?” Nancy asks. 

“No parents, a big house?” Carol says, as if Nancy is a giant idiot.

You feel bad for her being treated so poorly by her boyfriend’s friends, so you lean in and whisper, “A party, Nancy.” Then you look at Steve. “And no, I’ll pass.” 

Steve pouts. “Can’t leave loverboy alone for a couple hours?”

You scoff, shoving the poster against his chest, using more force than probably necessary, but the satisfying grunt he lets out pleases you. “If I didn’t know you I’d say you sound jealous. Unfortunately, I do know you, and that’s exactly why I’m not interested.”

“Meow,” says Carol as she and Tommy laugh. 

You ignore her and push past the group to get to class. You’ve wasted enough time, you have to study. Steve lets you, hurt by your words, but tries to play it off, instead focusing his attention on Jonathan up ahead hanging up some posters. You both see him at the same time and as you start to approach him, you hear Steve and his group mock him. 

“God, that’s depressing.” Steve says, and you’ve never wanted to hit a man more than you do right now. 

You glance at Nancy, trying to convey your disappointment in her. She’s a nice girl, she shouldn’t be with an idiot like Harrington. Who the hell makes fun of a guy with a missing brother? Nancy doesn’t meet your eye, which pleases you. She should feel guilty. 

As you near Jonathan, Nancy calls after you to wait up. You listen, mostly because you’re surprised she even followed, and together you walk up to him. “Hey, bee. I thought you’d be long gone by now.” 

Jonathan looks up at your voice, surprised when he sees Nancy next to you. He gives you a look that you conclude is a what is she doing here? look and you can only shrug as if to say I have no clue how I ended up in this situation. 

Nancy doesn’t see this exchange. “Hey,”

“Hey,” Jonathan responds, still confused. 

Nancy looks at you uncertainly, but you refuse to leave. Screw your exam, if she even considers voicing her boyfriend’s opinions to Jonathan then you’ll personally see that she fails alongside you. “I just… I wanted to say, you know… I’m sorry, about everything.” 

Oh, she’s being nice. You’re still unimpressed, but Jonathan motions to you to stop staring her down, so you reluctantly listen. 

“Everyone’s thinking about you.”

You all turn towards Steve and his group, who are clearly listening in, and you snort at her words. “Right, obviously.” 

“Y/N.” Jonathan warns. 

“Sorry.” 

“It sucks.” Nancy continues, and you have to give her some credit. You’re being a blatant bitch, but she’s still trying. You feel a bit bad now, which honestly makes you dislike her a bit more. Damn morals. “I’m sure he’ll be fine, he’s a smart kid.” 

The bell rings, ending Nancy’s little monologue. “I have to go, chemistry test. Y/N, want to walk together?” 

She really makes it impossible to be a bitch to her. “Sure, just give me a second.”

You lean close to Jonathan and lower your voice. “Good luck with your dad, bee.” 

“How did you know I’d go-”

“Because of course you would. Now go, give him hell for me, will ya?”

Jonathan nods, relieved you aren’t pushing the topic. You know that Lonnie is a sore topic for him, for the entire Byers family, really. You only knew Lonnie for a year or so before Joyce left him, but you’ll never forget his spiteful words and the bruises that Jonathan tried to hide from you. He needs to do this alone, father and son. 

You see Nancy watching, and just to spite her you kiss Jonathan’s cheek, relishing in the fact that she looks away, and you wish him luck once again before following her to class. 

The test isn’t as bad as you’d feared, and the rest of the day goes by with relative ease. You don’t see much of Steve and his group and you’re thankful for that. Nancy also keeps her distance, no longer attempting to be all buddy buddy with you. A part of you feels bad about that, because honestly the thought of someone thinking you hate them makes you feel physically ill, but as long as Nancy is with someone like Steve, there’s not much you can do about that. 

After school you stop by all of Jonathan’s classes and collect the work he’s missed over the last few days; he has enough to worry about, so you figured you could help do some assignments for him. It’s nothing unusual, truth to be told. There was a time you were out for two weeks straight due to the flu one year and Jonathan did every one of your assignments, so it’s about time you returned the favor. 

Once you have what you need, you hang up the remaining flyers in your bag and begin your journey to work. You’ve used up all of your sick days helping the Byers, and while Mrs. Waters has insisted on letting you have more time off, you figured the distraction would be good for you. Jonathan will want some space after confronting his dad, and as much as you hated Lonnie, something told you he had nothing to do with Will. 

Just when your shift is almost done, your coworker, this young kid named Alex who you’re honestly surprised can legally work, informs you that your mom is on the phone and wants to speak with you. You stack the remaining books in your hands and thank him, walking over to pick up the call.

“Hey, mom. Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, sweetie! I was just calling to tell ya that Dusty is at the Wheeler’s tonight for dinner, so my plan for ribs won’t work without him. I was wondering if darling Johnny could feed you tonight? I know the two of you have that little sneaky food game.” 

Your posture, once slumped over and uninterested, now straightens out. Why the hell is Dustin having dinner at the Wheeler’s? They never do that. “Uh, sure mom that won’t be an issue.”

Your mom lets out a sigh of relief. “Bless that Jonathan! I’ve always liked him…”

Your mom may be the biggest Jonathan supporter you’ve ever met. “Yeah, he’s your favorite. I know,” you shift a bit to catch Alex’s attention, mouthing to him that you need to leave work early. “Hey, did Dustin by chance say how long he’ll be at the Wheeler’s? I can swing by and pick him up after my shift.” 

“Oh, I think he’s staying the night there. He mentioned something about Mike not finishing his part of their little science project?”

They’re calling the little girl a science project now? Boys are so typical. “Oh, I see. Well, I gotta get back to work, mom. I’ll be home late tonight.”

Your mom wishes you goodbye and warns you not to be out too late. You hum, already trying to figure out the quickest route to the Wheeler’s house. You can’t say you’re surprised that Mike didn’t follow the plan, but you also can’t say you were prepared for this either. 

Alex comes back with your boss and you quickly make up a lie about not feeling well. Mrs. Waters gives you a pitying look and tells you to go. You’re incredibly grateful for her, she’s like a grandmother to you and has always been so kind. 

You quickly bike to Mike’s house, going over a grand speech in your head for the boys. Logistically speaking, you’re not sure if they can even harbor the little girl in his basement. Would it be kidnapping? Could kids even kidnap other kids? You aren’t sure and you definitely aren’t willing to find out. 

You arrive at the house just as Nancy and Barb are pulling out of the driveway, presumably to Steve’s grand house party. They wave at you awkwardly and you don’t have it in you to wave back. You park your bike next to their doorstep and knock on the door. 

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” Mrs. Wheeler asks after opening the door. 

“Oh, I was just wondering if I could hang out with the boys tonight? Jonathan’s busy and I promised Dustin I’d help with their campaign.”

Mrs. Wheeler cocks her head at you. “But I thought there was a special assembly at the school for Will? Nancy and Barb just left for it.” 

You feel your blood boil a bit. There was no assembly for Will at your school, and it was really damn low of Nancy to use his disappearance as a cover story for her stupid party. She’s known Will since he was practically a baby. You have no idea how someone could be so unaffected by a missing child, let alone one who has been at your house every damn weekend for years now. 

“Oh, that!” You force yourself to remain calm; there isn’t time to snitch on Nancy, Mrs. Wheeler would only have more questions for you. “Yeah, I’m, uh, skipping it. Jonathan doesn’t want to go, so after he’s back from his errands I’m heading over to his place to, you know, comfort him?” 

The woman stares at you for a second, trying to determine if there are any lies to your words. You’ve never been the best liar, but being the oldest Henderson child has unfortunately prepared you for being quick on your feet when needed. 

“Well, come on then. They boys just went downstairs, and if you can please remind them to bring the plate of food back up here I’d really appreciate it.”

You thank Mrs. Wheeler and let yourself in. Her words have all but solidified your suspicions: Mike kept the girl. 

When you descend the basement steps, it’s almost comical how the kids scramble to hide the girl like little cockroaches. They run around and Dustin screams something about covering her before the poor girl is being manhandled into a sheet as Mike screams at Lucas and Dustin to calm down. 

“Guys! It’s just me! Jesus!” You shout, shoving past Mike to rush over to the girl and free her from the sheets. She looks more frightened than usual, but at least she’s alive. 

“God, why am I always the one you push?”

You shush Mike, smoothing back the girl’s hair and offering her a reassuring smile. “Remember me, sweetheart?”

The girl nods and softly says, “Y/N.”

“Very good. I’m going to scream at my brother real quick, so why don’t you cover your ears for me so you don’t get too frightened?” 

“Wait, what-”

The minute her ears are covered, you turn to Dustin and begin screaming. “Are you brain dead and not understand the words ‘tell me if anything weird happens’ or do you simply lack the appropriate empathy needed for a concerned sister?”

Dustin ducks his head in shame. “Y/N, look-”

“No! I’m all for helping you guys with your adventures and whatever, but Will went missing and then she appears and Mike,” you turn to him and he hides behind a frightened Lucas. “You said you’d stick to your plan. Now tell me, did you?”

Mike shakes his head, his eyes wide. Dustin looks no better as he cowers behind the others. Lucas simply shrugs, knowing that this would happen. You never, ever, yell at the boys; the few times you have in the past, all hell had broken loose. 

“Y/N-”

“Zip it, Henderson. I’m so pissed off at you right now and if you want to make it to thirteen I suggest you keep quiet.” 

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. Now, why don’t you guys catch me up on what you’ve so sweetly kept hidden from me.” It’s worded as a question, but the boys know better than to deny you. 

You sit on the ground so that you’re next to the girl and then motion for the three boys in front of you to start speaking. They look at Mike, giving him a nudge, and he hesitantly steps forward to begin speaking. “Her name is El.”

The girl, El, looks up at you and smiles. You return the smile and knock your shoulder against hers in a playful manner. “Nice to meet you, can I ask what El is short for?”

“Eleven,” she says, and you want to question the name further but the look on Mike’s face stops you. Now is not the time, you guess. 

“El, she’s… different.” Mike continues, looking around nervously. He’s acting as if someone could break in any second and snipe you guys, and a part of you doesn’t doubt it can happen. “She has these powers, like, mind control powers.”

You snort, unable to stop yourself. El looks at you, looking unoffended, seemingly expecting this reaction. However, Mike groans at you. “Y/N, this is serious. She-she knows about Will.”

At this, your smile fades and you feel an overwhelming sense of hope take over you. You find your arms wrapping around El before you can control yourself and you give her a tight hug. She stiffens in your arms and you immediately pull away. “I’m sorry, I just… sorry.”

She laughs a bit, softly saying that it’s okay. 

“Do you really know Will? Where he is?” You ask, almost too scared to say the words out loud. If she’s telling the truth… you shake your head in an attempt to dispel any false hope. You don’t know this girl, she could be lying. 

Before El can say anything else, Mike speaks for her. “She does, but there’s bad men out there who want to hurt her. I think they’re after Will, too.” 

You freeze. “Bad men?”

“Yes, this is why we didn’t want to tell you!”

“I wanted to tell her,” Lucas says, which causes Mike to glare at him.

You wave your arms at the two boys, breaking up their fight. “Mike, what do you mean by bad men? Honey,” you look at El, “did someone hurt you? Are you in danger? Should I call the police?”

“No!” All three boys shout at once. 

You look at them, at the genuine fear in their eyes, and sigh, “Okay, if you can give me a good reason not to call the cops, I won’t.”

“Did you not hear the part about El having powers?” Dustin asks. 

“Gee, Dustin. You’re right! It’s like her having powers is totally believable and reassuring to the situation at hand!”

“I can show you,” El speaks up. 

You all face her now. “You can?” 

She nods at you, getting up and grabbing your backpack that you threw on the ground when you walked in. She rustles through it while you and the boys look at one another. After a few seconds, El grabs one of your comic books and places it on the table. She looks at you and tilts her head, indicating for you to sit down next to her; you do as you’re told.

El straightens out your comic and then closes her eyes, going completely still. The air around you shifts and you can practically feel the static electricity encasing you; the hair on your arms stand up. The pages of the comic begin to flick up, fluttering as if someone is thumbing through them in rapid succession. You watch as the Spidey panels flash before your eyes, the pages flying faster and faster until it becomes almost frightening to be near. Then, once it gets to its last page, the comic flies up into the air and hovers for a few seconds, right in front of your face. 

“Holy shit,” you breathe out, your eyes wide. 

Just as quickly as it began, the comic drops back onto the table. You look up at El and see that her nose is now bleeding, which rips you back to reality. The chair scrapes against the ground as you get up to help her, dabbing at the blood with a tissue that had been laying on the table. 

“Do you believe us now?” Mike asks, a smug look on his face. 

You gently wipe away the remaining blood from El’s face, looking her in the eye and directing your words to her. “I’m listening, sweetheart. What can you do to help us find Will?” 

El smiles, pleased to have earned your trust, and you get the feeling that this little girl is the most powerful thing in all of Hawkins, maybe even the world. At her request, Mike places his DnD board on the table and arranges the pieces for El to use. She sits down and closes her eyes once more.

Lucas gives you a doubtful look. “What’s the weirdo doing?”

You flick his head, not enjoying the name calling. Honestly, you thought you raised these boys better than that. 

El seems to accomplish whatever she was doing and picks up the wizard piece, murmuring, “Will.” 

You feel your heart stop. Will always insisted on being the wizard whenever they played the game. He was Will the Wise, forever and always. El couldn’t have simply guessed that, and you know it’s her-

“Superpowers,” Dustin finishes your thought for you. The two of you exchange a glance and you notice the slight glee in his eyes. Under different circumstances, you’d also find this all pretty cool. 

Mike sits next to El and begins to ask some questions about where she last saw Will. She gives him a look that you can’t quite decipher before swiping her arm across the table and spilling the pieces onto the floor. She then flips the board over, having it now face upside down, and places Will’s piece back down. 

You knit your brows together, trying to follow along. El’s movements are methodical and carefully planned, being unable to find the right words due to her poor speech, and you try to piece together the information you’ve been given. 

“I don’t understand,” Mike says, being extra gentle with El. You’ve never seen him so soft spoken before and you’re grateful at least one of the boys doesn’t view her as some monster. Which reminds you that you need to have a conversation with Dustin about respecting women, but for now you’ll hold off.

“Hiding.” says El. 

He’s good at hiding, Jonathan’s words echo in your head. 

“Will is hiding?” 

El nods, now looking more nervous. You can tell that Mike is getting closer to information that she doesn’t want him near, which finally causes you to ask the question that’s been heavily on your mind. “From the bad men?”

Now El gives a slight shake of the head, and Mike presses on. “Then from who?”

Without saying anything, El places a second piece onto the board right in front of Will’s. It’s a piece you’re unfamiliar with, with two snake-like heads that loom over the small wizard piece. Whatever it is, you know it isn’t good judging the way Mike, Dustin, and Lucas look at each other in fear.

You turn to Dustin and whisper, “What’s that piece?”

Your brother puts his hands behind his head and sighs deeply, a new resigned look on his face. He looks as if he’s just aged thirty years, which you find a bit dramatic. “It’s the Demogorgon.”

“The Demo-what?” The name sounds familiar, but you can’t remember anything about it.

Mike looks at you and for once his voice holds no annoyance when he says, “There’s a lot we still have to catch you up on.”

– 

Your head is spinning as you bike to Jonathan’s with all the new information you’ve just received. Demogorgons, magical vortexes, kids with damn superpowers. It’s all a lot for you to take in, and while you fully believe that El is something entirely different from a normal little girl, how can you be sure that it’s connected to Will? While his disappearance still confuses you, it’s illogical to jump to supernatural conclusions. 

Dustin had begged you to let him spend the night at Mikes in order to keep talking to El, and you only agreed because you figured you’d be at Jonathan’s again tonight anyways. He’s been MIA all day and you’re worried as usual, but you made him and Mike swear to you that they’d stay put in the house. At least this way they’re in one place, so if they screw around they’ll be easier to find. 

When you arrive at the Byers home you notice that Jonathan’s car isn’t in the driveway, which only confuses you further. Where the hell is he? You gave him all day to deal with Lonnie and cool off, trusting that he wouldn’t do anything stupid for twelve hours, and yet… 

You fear he’s done something stupid. 

You don’t have time to think too much about Jonathan’s absence because a frantic Joyce runs out the door screaming. She runs straight past you and into her car, and the house begins to light up like a christmas tree. You can hear The Clash’s Should I Stay or Should I Go, a song that Will once had on repeat for three weeks straight, and you can feel the same static electricity in the air that you felt when El used her powers in front of you. 

Joyce suddenly gets out of the car and spots you, pointing towards her house. “You see that too?”

You swallow. “Yeah,”

She nods, as if your confirmation is all she needs to determine her sanity, and then marches inside. You stand in the yard, motionless. You’re terrified, and after learning about El tonight, you don’t have it in you to discover any other supernatural beings in Hawkins at the moment. Sighing, you follow after the woman because Jonathan isn’t home and someone needs to talk her down from whatever panic attack the flashing lights have inevitably caused. 

“Mrs. Byers-” 

“Y/N, you can’t tell me there isn’t something,” Joyce waves her hands in front of her face, almost grasping at the air, “weird about all of this. That was Will’s song, the lights were flashing in Will’s room, something came out of Will’s wall-”

“Something came out of his wall?”

“Yes! I’m not… I promise I’m not crazy, okay? You saw it, please tell me you saw it.”

You bite your lip, now thinking about El. You swore to Mike you wouldn’t tell anyone about her, and honestly you’re not sure that you should tell Joyce about her right now. You’re still unsure if El is being honest with you, and you can’t just give the woman false hope for her son. It’d kill you if you were wrong about El. But seeing the lights, hearing the music, the thing in the wall… There’s something that she’s not telling you. 

“Mrs. Byers… I’m not quite sure what I saw, but we just had a bad storm and it could be faulty wiring.” 

Joyce slumps her shoulders, frustrated that you aren’t conspiring with her. You just… you can’t. Not yet. Not before you figure out what the hell El is doing in Hawkins. You refuse to worsen Joyce’s already chronic anxiety and paranoia; Jonathan would never forgive you if you fed into her delusions, but it kills you to lie to her. 

“Look, I do think that something is weird about this entire situation, “ Joyce’s face lights up, but you’re quick to add, “however, there’s no proof. You, I mean-Mrs. Byers, you’ve seen things in the past. You’re stressed, and anxious, and all the other synonyms.” 

The woman lets a few tears drop from her eyes, now embarrassed. “Maybe you’re right. I-I’m sorry, honey. I just-”

You grab her hand. “I know,”

Her smile is brittle, a ghost of the once beautiful smile she’d give you, and your heart breaks for her. 

After your conversation, Joyce excuses herself to her room. She looks even more exhausted than before, so you leave her alone and hole yourself up in Jonthan’s room. 

You glance at your watch and note the late hour; you’re starting to worry now. Jonathan didn’t mention anything besides Lonnie and the posters, so you don’t know what else he could be doing so late. He wouldn’t go searching for Will without you. 

You wake up to Jonathan returning an hour or so later, apparently having fallen asleep while waiting for him. 

“Y/N?” His voice is gruff and surprised. 

You groan and rub your eyes. “Turn the light off, bee.”

He doesn’t. “What are you doing here?”

The tone of his voice wakes you up a bit, making you sit up and look at him more clearly. His shoulders are tense, his eyes are hiding something, and his overall demeanor is hard to read. “I had something to tell you, but is everything okay?”

“You couldn't have waited until tomorrow? Y/N, this is my house, just… just get out.”

“I’m sorry?” You’re confused by his behavior, now starting to become a bit defensive and hurt by his dismissal. 

“You can’t just let yourself in whenever you please.” Jonathan puts his camera on his desk, still refusing to meet your eyes.

“Jonathan, we literally have always let ourselves into each other’s houses whenever we please.” 

He rolls his eyes at you and rips off his jacket, throwing it at you. “Get out!”

You catch the jacket before it hits you in the face. “What the hell, Jonathan!” 

“Listen, I get that you think you’re a part of the family, but you’re not. You’ve been here for days now, it’s getting old.” 

His words cut through you and leave vicious wounds against your skin. He doesn’t mean that, he can’t mean that. You and him were family. He’s never, ever insinuated anything less. He wouldn’t dare. Your Jonathan would never act like this to you, and the only time he’s ever been this cruel to you was when he accidentally dropped Lonnie’s last beer in the fridge and was too embarrassed and ashamed to ask for help; he’d shown up with bruises later that night.

Then it hits you. He did something, something that makes him feel guilty; he keeps glancing at his camera. You soften your voice, “Bee, what did you do?”

He whips around, now yelling. “Nothing! Just get the hell out of my house! It’s getting pathetic!” 

You swallow back the angry tears that build in your throat. Fine. Whatever. Let him be a raging bitch after everything you’ve done for him these last few days. 

“Fine, I will.” Grabbing your backpack you snatch the assignments you were supposed to give Jonathan and slam them against his chest. “Here’s all your fucking assignments, by the way.” 

He seems to come back to himself, blinking away the anger and shame. “Bug…”

“You don’t get to call me that.” And with that, you don’t spare Jonathan another glance. 

– 

When you get home, the house is eerily quiet. Dustin is at Mike’s and your mom leaves you a note saying that she’s spending the night at your aunt’s. Great. Looks like it’s just you and Mews tonight then. 

After everything that’s happened tonight, you never found time to eat dinner, and your stomach is loudly growling. You drop your stuff in your room and then reheat some leftovers, feeling like a pathetic child. You know that Jonathan didn’t mean what he said, but the words had come too easily to him to have just been a way to dodge his guilt. There had been some truth to them. Maybe you were pathetic for always fretting over him.

Dinner is quiet tonight. 

You wait for the phone to ring, for Jonathan to call you and apologize, but the call never comes. 

You’ve never felt so alone before.

-

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[twisted-wonderland-but-gayer]

Being His Sibling- Riddle Rosehearts

Idk the idea came to me. Yuu is GN— 6k words

Tws/Cws: Yuu is said to have medium length hair, Riddles mom is expectedly shitty and abusive, Yuu has shady behavior because of shitty abusive mom. Yuu is untrustworthy of Riddles friends for the first half. Hurt/comfort, angst with a good ending. No incest! Just Platonic!

Before NRC:

You were the older sibling of the Rosehearts family. Being the oldest, one of the very first things you have learned since becoming sentient is that a mothers love is no different from a mothers hatred. From the minute you could babble, your mother did everything she could do to control you. You weren’t allowed outside to play, you weren't allowed any snacks no matter how much your stomach rumbled. You weren't allowed to wear fun or silly stuff. And you were never allowed to fail or talk back.

Soon, your mother— the term rotted in your mouth— soon became pregnant again, and your precious little brother Riddle came to be. You remember your father holding you up to see the small bundle of joy in your mothers arms, excited that you may have a playmate. The excitement however, became resentment.

From the minute he was born, you were no longer a priority, usually being ignored in favor of the new addition to the family. Your chatter is ignored, your physical needs pushed aside, and your emotions bottled. Even when you went to talk to your baby brother and interact with him, mother would immediately begin to lecture you for seeing him without her permission, and you were locked away in your room to study. Yet whenever you peeked out, you saw your mother cooing and coddling Riddle, something you never really remember experiencing, but she would never play with the child.

Whenever you heard your mothers footsteps fade into the distance, you would come out to play, giving Riddle all the things you wish you were given. And one day, you heard his first words— your name. “Yu!” The baby gurgled, making you jump. “What did you say?” “Yuuu!” A wobbly smile grew on your face as you hugged the baby, in that moment promising yourself that you would always protect him

As you got older so did your brother, and mother did what she always does, control. But this time it was different. Mother would always praise Riddle for his studies, but never you. She was always lighter on his scolding, when she would scream at you. Though you were also locked away to study, she never really cared about your progress the same way she did Riddle’s. From there started a grudge that you would hold onto. What’s the point of doing anything mom wants when Riddle’s her precious little angel? If you don't matter at all what would it matter if you acted up?

Mother didn’t entertain your rebellious streak for long, the screaming match that came from you simply saying you wanted to go outside instead of reading left a mark on you. “I don’t get you, Yuu! I did everything for you! I cleaned you, I bathed you, I gave you life! I cook and clean for you! Why cant you be more like Riddle!” She screamed. “I'm sorry mama… I'm sorry!” Your child self babbled shakily while sobbing. “I just wanna play outside with the other kids!”

Father stepped in to try and stand up for you, but he got yelled at too. And you remember watching as your potential savior gave up on you, allowing mother to lock you away in your room again. And yet, you could still hear as she walked off, muttering insults under her breath, wondering why she ever had you.

Riddle soon became the age you were when you started ‘acting out’ and since then you’ve learned to be more sneaky. When mom went away you would sneak out to visit him in his room, playfully messing with him and getting him to take a break to play. “Won’t mom get mad?” Riddle asked, looking up at you with big stormy gray eyes. “As long as you don't tell her— that being said,” You dropped to your knees. You knew that even if she found out, you would be the one blamed for it, “Only I can visit you okay? Don’t come into my room..” “Why?” You chuckled, trying to find a believable excuse. “Cause my room is super boring! Seriously you won't like it.” “Oh.. okay!” Riddle beamed, allowing you to distract him from the theory books he’s forced to read, and telling him fairy tales instead to watch his eyes grow big with wonder.

Mom thought that you were no longer a problem. You never spoke up or out, you did as she said with your head bowed down, you always ate what she gave to you no matter how tasteless it was, and you excelled at your studies. Finally, she was relieved that you stopped resisting, not knowing how you actually were,

For months, you snuck out and played with Riddle in his room, even giving him the answers to some of the assignments mother forced him to do. At parties you were forced to attend, you went behind your mothers back to steal some sweets to sneak to Riddle, knowing how much he always wanted to try them. And when he was still hungry from the small portions of food he was given, you would give him yours, ignoring your own stomach just to see your brother beam.

One day however, Riddle came to your room. “What are you doing here? Only I can go into your room remember?” “Well, um, I know but…” Riddle pulled at your hand to guide you to his room. “There's people at my window!” “Really huh?” “Mmhmm!” Going into his room, you saw two figures peeking through. Both young boys, one a feline beast man with bright pink hair and a stunning smile, and the other a green haired boy with glasses closer to your age.

“They said they want me to play with them but I said I had to ask you first. Can I play with them? Please please please, Yuu?” Riddle pouted, and a pang of jealousy hit you for a moment before you let out a breath. You should be happy for your brother, even if you wish to join them, but you must stay behind and keep watch.

“Of course, Riddle.” You said. “Just come back in on my cue, okay? We can't let mom find out.” You smiled at him, helping him climb out of the window and outside, where you melancholically watched the trio play. It was okay though, your brother is happy just like you promised.

All good things came to an end, however. You were too late on your cue, and Mother found out. You have never heard Riddle cry as hard as he did that day in your entire life, his terrified wails leaving a scar on your heart. However you knew what came next was going to be worse. She was going to scream at you too. You heard Riddle apologize over and over and over and over— It was driving you insane.

Suddenly, you entered the room. You were going to get screamed at anyways, so what did it matter? “Yuu get out of here, dont think your off the hook either! I can’t believe you went behind my back like that! I thought your matured! Aren’t you supposed to be a role model for your little brother?!” “Aren't you supposed to be a mom?”

“Excuse me?!” The wretched woman demanded.

“You treat me and Riddle like shit!” The woman’s face contorted with shock at the language that she never taught you— unaware of the secret books you hid that she didn't approve of. “All you do is scream at us and lock us up! Whenever we ask for anything and do anything you don't like, you just scream at us!” You sobbed, “Why did you even have kids if you don't want to raise them!”

“Do not speak to you mother like that—“

“You’re not my mom! You are the worst mom ever! I hate you! Ever since Riddle was born you always ignored me! And you don't even take care of him either! This is why you and dad fight all the time! You’re never happy with anything. Even when I do everything you ask you're never impressed! All you do is scream! I hate you! I hate you so much!”

Your kid self sobbed, and mother seemed to forget about Riddle, harshly grabbing your arms and dragging off. As she did, you saw your father behind her, merely standing by, doing nothing to save you. You weren't allowed out of your room for days, you weren’t even allowed around Riddle without supervision either.

That's when you really became unruly. If mother locked the windows and doors of the house you would pick them and sneak out. When she conducts room checks, you memorize all the places she looks so you can keep your forbidden goods hidden. Mother hated you, and she made it known. Everything she said was a snide remark at you. How at 18 you will be kicked out. How awful of a kid you are. How fat you're getting since you're sneaking food. How your magic will never be as good as Riddles since you're slacking off.

One day, however, it all boils over. You don’t remember how old you were— 15? 16? Maybe 17? But what you do remember is mom starting up a classic screaming match, talking about how ungrateful and wicked you are. Comparing you to Riddle and saying how she hopes you haven’t corrupted him with your evilness.

“Don't you dare bring Riddle into this! This is between us. This argument is between us! How dare you accuse me of hating my brother, when you have done nothing but make his life hell, when all you have ever done is turn us against each other! When you placed my entire worth on a few pathetic books” You screamed back at her as the verbal abuse continued. Riddle soon came down from his room, as you looked at him.

He’s gotten taller now, and face slightly longer. He walks with perfect posture. Usually, you felt comfort in your brother, but you noted his unimpressed expression. “Riddle, please, don't get involved. This is between me and mom.”

“Why do you hate her so much?”

“What?”

“She’s right.”

Mother seemed to smirk as you turned to look at him

“You’re joking.” You sneer.

Riddle glares. “It's not her fault that you don't care for the rules. If you only followed them, you wouldn’t be in trouble all the time.”

“That's the issue, her rules always change for me so she has a reason to keep getting mad at me.”

“Maybe if you kept studying you wouldn’t be so stupid as to not understand the value of rules! She’s right! You have done nothing but cause trouble for as long as I can remember! If you would just listen—“

You shook with anger, “Don't you dare talk to me about listening, Riddle! I gave everything for you! Don't you dare pretend the happiest days of your miserable life weren't because of me! I did everything I could to try and look after you and you just—“

You were silenced by a loud slap across your face. It stung. You froze, holding the area as it bruised, bleeding in the areas where the nails made contact with your skin. “How dare you talk to your brother like that! Stop being so jealous over—“ You didn't register what she said, your ears ringing as eyes welling with tears as all you could was look at Riddle who seemed to stare at you with disdain.

This wasn't the Riddle you knew. The Riddle you grew up with. The Riddle that babbled your name as a baby. How long have you been protecting a stranger? Acting up so he can have the slightest bit of freedom that you longed for.

You narrowed your eyes before clenching your fists. "Shut up!" You snapped at your mother. "I'm sick of you! You want me gone? Fine! I'm out!" "Yuu Rosehearts! You go through that door I'm calling the police!" "Go ahead! Tell them what a shitty mom you are! And you!" You glare at Riddle before closing your eyes. "Just stay out of my life."

You walked out, snagging a fair amount of money that you saved over the years to book it out of the Queendom of Roses, finding your own place to crash at as you work a few jobs to keep yourself afloat, up until you are invited to NRC.

At NRC, before Riddle:

You were sorted into Heartslabyul, the dorm of law and order much to your surprise. You were expecting Scarbia or Savanaclaw given their dorms ‘survival of the fittest’ themes. Still, you would take what you could get.

As you stood in line for your dorm, you noticed a familiar green-haired man in the same group. Trey made eye contact with you, obviously surprised to see you, and gave you a nervous smile. You glared at him before looking away. You wanted nothing to do with the man that's responsible for feeding into Riddle’s issues. You both avoided each other, only interacting with necessary and never dragging anything out with each other.

Surprisingly, you thrived in Heartslabyul, able to heal your inner child with all the mundane tasks you had to do, even guiding others and helping them with theirs. You did well in school, usually getting the top score on every test. You had to get good grades for a good job, especially since your parents cut you off financially. You can’t afford to slack off, and yet, you helped to tutor others. Not to mention your magical knowledge and use was already ahead of most others.

At some point within the year, the dormleader approached you, much to your surprise. He noticed all you heard work and wanted to hand off the title to you. After all, next year he would be a senior and would have to go off campus. He would need someone to look after the dorm when that happens and after all he’s done, he needs a break.

Being a dorm leader would look great on transcripts on top of all the other benefits it had. You accepted, and the crown was passed down to you. You were honestly the best dormleader at the school given the fact you knew how to lead, were kind, and got all your shit and trauma together. You were relaxed, but still implemented rules, including all of the Queen of Hearts rules to honor her dorm. Of course, you weren't too strict.

“You need to have lemonade with two sugars,” You mentioned to your dormmate. “Eh- sorry dorm leader I’ll—“ “Don't panic, just stand up and drink it.” “Huh?” You smiled. “If you truly look at the rules and all the addendums, you’ll find a lot of loopholes. The rules says you have to sit down and have two sugars in lemonade. It didn't say what you couldn’t drink while standing.”

You smirked, your mothers rules and years of having to deal with shady jobs made it easy for you to find exploits in any sort of fine print handed your ways, and you were sure to try and teach your underlings the same. Even if they didn’t use exploits and didn’t care much for the crazy rules, you didn’t mind. You weren’t a tyrant. The entire dorm looked forward to each Unbirthday and Birthday party you planned, each one stretching traditions to their limit to offer something unique.

Your knowledge of contracts and high test scores even attracted the attention of other dorms, especially a certain octopus. When you caught some of your students in shady contracts, you would review it with them and point out everything they could take advantage of. This led to you being confronted by the Octavinelle housewarden pretty quickly, though annoyed he was quite impressed.

“Now there Yuu, I do hope you can not interfere with business.” “I don't plan to. If any of my dorm members decide to sign their life away, that's their fault. I can point out a few chips in the contract, but it’s not my job to save them.” Azul seemed impressed. “My, my, it’s quite rare to find someone so reasonable!” Azul smiled with his honeyed voice. “I do wonder how you did not end up in our dorm.”

***

On top of your housewarden duties, you also ended up finding a wonderful job working for Mostro Lounge, not at Mostro Lounge. Your quick thinking and keen eye helped to calculate Azul’s profits faster than he ever could— you had experience from your times of being homeless and couch surfing. On top of that, you would always point out where he could make a contract more water tight, or places where he could reword it so can exploit his victim for even more. It gave you work experience and a good wage that you and Azul both fought over in your business contract together.

Ironic how Azul ended up with another rowdy and rule breaking member under him, as you also stretched the contract you made to its limit. Azul for once didn’t mind too much, since you were fair as long as he was. Plus you keep those twins out of his way too.

After all of these years of working your ass off, you finally, finally made it. You had a stable home for the next few years. Food security! A job! Spare money for little things! Amazing grades! You made it! You would be fine! Despite everything you have gone through, you are going to be okay. You looked in the mirror of your room admiring the hair you dyed to cover up the ruby red locks of hair that tied you to your past. You were free.

It was one night in your dorm, where you were approached by Trey. Even though it has been a year, it was still awkward between you two, and you both didn’t talk to each other. You looked at Trey with the best neutral expression you could muster. “Can I help you?”

“Riddle is coming.” “Pardon?” “Riddle has been accepted into Night Raven, he’s coming next year.” You shut your eyes pensively. “I see.” “Y’know… maybe you both can… Make up…?” You shot a glare at Trey. I’m not taking advice from someone as two-faced as you— an asskisser, you wanted to say. “I’d rather not.” You simply said, making your way to your room. “Goodbye Trey, do not stick your nose where it doesn’t belong.” You warned, entering your room just to lay back on bed and stare at the ceiling with a newfound dread.

The next year with Riddle:

You stood as the housewarden representative of your dorm, watching as freshmen emerge from their coffins to get sorted. Then you saw him, Riddle. The red haired freshmen walked down the carpet to get sorted when he made eye contact with you, eyes widening for a brief moment before narrowing into a glare, not recognizing you at first with your dyed hair. He stood in front of the mirror, and though you knew it was unlikely, you still hoped that somehow, he would not end up sorted into your dorm.

“Heartslabyul.” The mirror spoke, and like that, everything started to crumble.

Guiding the freshmen to the dorms you stopped them in front of the dorm entrance. It was the dormleaders responsibility to assign everyone a card. “You will be a fine spade,” You said to one before allowing them in. “And you a diamond.” You waved the next person past you. “And you…” You paused when Riddle stood in front of you, before clearing your throat. “A heart would be most suited.”

The welcoming party went fine. You kept it traditional and laid back to not intimidate any of the new members, allowing everyone to socialize. As you engaged in the festivities and croquet, you noticed Riddle and Trey socializing, your brother looking sternly at Trey, before glancing over at you. You had a suspicion that even after all of these years, Riddle still needed to be superior to everyone. Your position as leader would not last long.

***

You had finalized the papers and packed your things. You were moving in the dorm you should have been a part of from the start: Savanaclaw. Azul cried crocodile tears that you didn’t join him, but you know that though you would have loved to be friends with your boss, he was a ticking time bomb of greed. Being under his control at all times was dangerous. Leona on the other hand, ultimately didn’t care about who joined so long as they could sort out their own shit. He was a safer, more minor and reasonable timebomb.

After packing, you went into the rose garden, noticing you were being followed in the distance. When you got to the center of it, where your favorite place in the whole school was, you turned around. It was Riddle and Trey. Tsk, what a surprise.

“I know you were ignoring me.” “Was I, dear brother? My apologies, it was never my intention.” Riddle would have nearly turned red if it wasn't for Trey putting a hand on his shoulder. How pathetic. He was just like his mother.

“I am here to tell you that I intend to duel you for the position of dorm leader.” “Okay, here.” You take off the crown on your head and offer it out to him, watching as your little brother stares at it a mix of baffled and offended. “Is this a joke? Or are you really that lazy and weak-willed?” Riddle demanded, “I refuse to just accept the crown, you need to put in the effort as a leader should!”

“I don't see why, I’m transferring dorms.” Trey raised his brows, “To where?” “Octavinelle,” you lied, not wanting to risk them harassing you in your new dorm. “Anyways, here you go, Housewarden Riddle. I’m sure you and Trey here would be wonderful leaders.”

“I refuse! Put in some effort for once in your life, Yuu!” Riddle scolded you in that damn tone mother always used on you.

You just laughed. “You do not deserve my effort, firstly. Secondly, are you being intentionally dense or have you forgotten what I said to you— I want you to stay out of my life. I do not want contact with any of you anymore. I'm done! I'm sorry it ended this way. I hope you get everything you ever wanted and I hope I hear nothing about it, truly, I do.”

You throw the crown onto the ground as you take a deep breath. “Don’t visit my new dorm. Do not look for me at all. I am tired of you always making me feel bad about myself and having to be superior to me. The years I spent away from all of you, were the happiest I ever had.” You glared, tears in your eyes as you look for any trace of what remained of the brother you once knew, only to be met with disgust, he huffs then speaks.

“Why would I ever visit or look for you? We are not family anymore if I recall, and we were never family to begin with. It’s ridiculous of you to even think I would want to be related to someone like you in the slightest.” Riddle stated. “You weren't my sibling. You never were, and never will be.” His glare made you chuckle cynically.

“Is that so? Well then, I’m glad that's the case…” You take a few steps closer to him, towering over Riddle height wise. It's impressive how much someone could grow when they weren't stressed all the time and had some proper food. You lowered your voice. “I cannot believe I wasted my entire life protecting you. The amount of abuse I have taken in your stead, all for nothing. You, you're just like her.” You sneer, pushing past Riddle before pausing. “I used to have a brother once you know? He had the kindest smile and the wildest imagination. Whenever we played pretend together we would imagine that we could both take over the world as brothers in arms. I wonder what happened to him.

You take another step forward as Trey looks away from you. “And you.” You sound absolutely feral by now. “I would have expected you of all people to not accept roles that you don’t want to be in,” You leaned in closer. “You damned two-faced son of a bitch. You allowed this to happen to him.” You didn't even look back at Trey as you made your way out of the maze, back to your room to change clothes, pack your bags and go.

***

Since the first week that Riddle took charge, you have heard nothing but horror stories. He was as tyrannical as you imagined him to be. Whatever, it wasn't your problem anymore, the others will get fed up and deal with him eventually, and maybe then he will finally learn. Besides, Trey seems to have no issues anyways.

Life in Savanaclaw was bliss, you fit in a bit too perfectly, not afraid to rough up others if it came to it. You shared a room with your closest friend, Ruggie. It surprised the both of you with how close you came, actually. Coming from a poor background, you both shared tips for saving money and DIY, along with helping each other do some sleazy things to get by.

You both helped each other get jobs, and you even helped Ruggie pay for stuff with no strings attached since you were more well off. You lended each other's stuff all the time. You even help him grab discounted stuff in bulk for him to take back to his village. You helped to tutor each other in subjects you both struggled with and would even allow him to copy your homework. You both understood each other. Finally, someone gets you!

You rarely see Riddle. The only time you ever do is during test postings. You go up to check your score, and as usual, it is in the top spot. Satisfied, you shrug and turn around, and go to walk off, when you see your brother in the crowd. Riddle's eyes look at the top spot in a mix of disbelief and jealousy, absolutely miffed on how he wasn't on top. You looked up to see where the Riddle's test was, just to see it directly below yours, only one extra credit point behind. You don't think much of it. You leave.

Every test, you would go and glance at the wall, just to make sure your grades were fine, and everytime you notice how Riddle looks absolutely frustrated. You honestly aren't doing it to try and get back at him at all, in fact you wouldn't care if Riddle beat you, as long as you were on the wall you were above average. Eventually, Riddle does beat you on one test— Algebraic Magic Notation, something you never really cared for.

You saw yourself in second place, noticing in the corner of your eye how Riddle seems to stare at you for your reaction, before you just shrug as you walk off, feeling a glare in the back of your head as you do so. You had lunch with Ruggie today.

Overblot:

You have heard about that new magicless student around. Enma Yuuken, his name was. Apparently he caused a lot of commotion at the entrance ceremony and is a dorm leader and stuff now, cool, good for him. You never expected him and his Heartslabyul friends to seek you out however.

You were exiting Mostro Lounge after some accounting and contract checking Azul had you do for his next big plan. As you walked through the dorm on your way out, you noticed a certain quad behind you. “… Can I help you?” You turned around and asked, looking at the students. There was a spade and heart with a collar from your brother around his neck, along with a tall, broad student behind them, monster on his shoulder.

“Hey are you Yuu? Chenya said we could find you here.” The spade asked respectfully. “Chenya huh…” You crossed your arms. “What do you need?” You asked curtly, staring at your newly dyed hair in the windows of the lounge. “Is it true Riddle’s your brother?” The heart asked desperately and sighed. “Not anymore. He’s dead to me. Is that all you need?” You narrowed your eyes.

“O-oh! Uh…” Deuce stuttered. “That doesn’t matter, can you tell us why the hell he's like this?” “Can I go back to my dorm?” “Is this not your dorm…?” Yuuken asks. You just blink at them. “Everyone we asked about said your from Octavinelle.” Grim muttered, you gripped your Savanaclaw ribbon in your fist to hide it.

"Firstly, I am a liar and you should never live in a place that your employer has control of, it will always result in a power imbalance, and believe me you do not want someone like Azul to have leverage over you. Secondly I don't share where I live because of people like you trying to ask me about Riddle."

You stare over at them watching as they all stare at each other with a tinge of guilt. You huff, "Fine, if you have questions, follow me. It's not safe to answer them here. There are eyes everywhere."

***

You look around outside of the dorm as you lead the group down the hall before stopping. “Okay what do you need to know?” “So your brother,” the heart starts. “How the fuck did he end up the way he is?” At that you let out a short laugh. “Oh, is that what this is about?” “Yeah sort of!” The heart sputters. “Look, we're trying to get him to stop being… like that… and we need to learn about him first!”

“I’m afraid you’ve been led on a wild goose chase. I haven’t had contact with him in years.” “Eh?!” The group booms. “Yeah, sorry about that, he told me I was never his sibling and that I never would be. If you really want to know why he’s like that, you should ask Trey.” “Trey?” Grim asks.

You nod. “They grew up together too, and he was around him for much longer since I left. Good luck overthrowing my brother though, if you need anything else let me know, though we haven’t talked to each other in a while, I can read him like a book.”

***

You didn't expect the quad to show up again the next day, this time at lunch where you sat. “What is it now?” You ask curiously as the heart— Ace, you learned, sits across from you pouting with his collar still on. “We’re challenging Riddle to the seat of housewarden!” “Oh?” Yuuken looks at you seriously and nods. “We need you to tell us everything about him."

You chuckle sadly. “Even if I did, you all stand no match. We were both forced to study magic before we could even walk, and you both have barely learned how to change colors of objects using magic. I’m sorry, but you cannot win.” Grim whines and Deuce sighs, “What, you saying we're weak?” “I am saying you are inexperienced. Do any of you even know how to cast a warding spell?”

The card soldiers went silent. “You know…” Yuuken starts. “Didn’t you fight Riddle since you were the housewarden before him? What did he do?” “I didn't. I gave it to him and left the dorm.” “You what?! You willingly handed over the dorm to him?!” Ace gawked. “I’m sorry, but it is not my job to save him from himself. Even if I won, he would just keep bothering me over and over. I ran away to get away from the person who defended the person that hit me, forgive me for not wanting to put up with him again.”

At that the table quieted. “So uh… what's your magic like… or your unique one at least…” Deuce asks. “Wouldn’t you like to know? All you know is that it tends to break the rules of everything around me when used— Ironically, with it, Riddle's spells wouldn’t even work with how by the book all his are.” “Breaks the rules..?” Deuce echoes. “Can’t tell you anything else, sorry.”

“Wait! What if we brought you with us as backup?” “It would be an invalid duel, I’m not from the dorm anymore.’ “What if you support us in the shadows or something.” “That's cheating!” Yuuken scolds. “Exactly.”

The cards sigh and you frown. “Look, I cannot help you with that from here, however, on the day of the duel I will accompany you. I'll hide in the crowd and step in if he takes it too far, since he tends to.”

He took it way too far as you stood before your brother, filled to the brim with blot. You sigh as you stand behind the freshmen you came to support, no longer hiding. “Come on Riddle. It doesn’t have to be like this.” “SILENCE! I am… I AM RIGHT! I AM STRONGER! You know NOTHING! You ran away! What would you know?!” “We aren't getting to them. Freshmen, get out of here, this is between us.”

“Nuh uh! I’m kicking his ass too!” Ace says. “Right!” Deuce replies. Yuuken pulls out his kendo stick, ready to fight despite being magicless. “Fine then, just follow my lead.”

***

You watched as the blot left your brother in front of you. The tyrant, no longer fighting. Then, and only then, did you collapse from your injuries. Even when you gave those freshies direct orders they put themselves in harm's way, meaning you had to tank the hit for them. “Yuu!” Deuce called out. “I'm fine! I'm just… tired…” You felt blood drip down your face as you laid down.

Upon snapping out of the blot, you heard sobbing, the same sad sobs that happened on that fateful day. “I'm sorry!” Riddle shouts, reminding you of how mother would making him apologize over and over. Your head pounds, and the next thing you feel is someone sitting next to you, putting a hand near your face to check your breath before resting it on your cheek, and you recognize it.

They were larger than they were before, but the softness was unmistakably Riddle’s. His hand held you face the same he did when you were both kids and you would lift him up in the air, pretending that he was flying. You smile and open your eyes, and are met with his face looking over you.

He was sobbing, face flushed and hair unkempt for the first time in his life, and yet the look in his eyes was unmistakably the Riddle you once knew. You smile up on him and reach up to cup his face as well. “I think… I finally found my little brother I used to play with after all these years…” You chuckle before sucking in a breath at the pain, making Riddle panic and pull you onto his lap. “Yuu!”

Riddle holds you close to him, pulling you in a hug. “I’m sorry! You were right! You were right… I treated you badly… Will you ever forgive me….?” He sobbed into your neck and you reached up to hug him. “I wasn't mad at you, Riddle. I never was. I was scared… Scared I lost you to her.”

You were critically injured, in unbearable pain, and yet here you were still protecting and comforting your little brother like you always swore you would. “I love you Riddle, always did you know that right?” Riddle choked back a sob and nodded. “Good, I’m glad you know.” “Don’t leave me… Please dont leave me alone again! Not after I just got you back…” “Hey… don't worry about me okay? I'll be fine, I’ve experienced worse. I'll bounce back in no time, and we can have tea parties again, Just like when we were kids,” you choke, and Crowley comes in just in time to pick you up as you struggle to breathe, making Riddle get up and crowd you.

“They’re going to be alright, right?” Riddle sobs. “Riddle,” you mumble. “Takes a lot more than that to kill me.” You beam confidently, despite the various injuries on your body. “Right now your dorm needs you. Show them what a great leader you can be, kay? I always thought you played a better queen than I did…” You slur. “I know that Heartslabyul will shine better with than it did with me.”

“Come on Yuu, let's get you to a doctor.” Crowley says, flying off with you in his arms. Riddle watched as he shook, and a smile grew on his face.

Resolution:

You lay on one of the beds in the nurse's office. Pixies come to cater to your needs every once and a while as you rest to the sound of the heart monitor beeping. You turn your head to the side to look in a mirror and your hair is an unruly mess that matches you, this time however, it is the same ruby red that matches your brother after you used a coloring spell on it. And for once, you do not hate your resemblance to him.

A knock is heard from the door, and you watch the door open in the mirror. Riddle comes in, a small tray in hand. The minute he sees you, he carefully approaches, placing the tray on the bedside table. You prop your bed up to see him better, smiling gently to try and ease his guilty and nervous expression.

“It’s nice to see you.” “I um… brought you something.” Riddle mumbles, opening the box he brought in. Unveiling it, you can see it is a tiny strawberry tart, the ones you would always try to sneak to him when you lived at home. The edges were burnt and it was slightly misshapen, but it was perfect. “I um.. made it, by myself.” He holds his hands in front of himself and looks down.

You reach over for it just to cause Riddle to fuss over you. “Don't move, you're hurt, I’ll feed you.” The housewarden holds the box in his arm, pulling out the spoon he brought with him and carefully scooping up a piece shakily before holding it to your mouth. “Heh, I can get used to this.” “You still have the energy to tease me on your deathbed? You really are… something…” Riddle pouts, making you snicker internally as you take the bite, savoring the tart in all its glory. It’s probably the best thing you’ve ever had.

“I'm sorry, I’m sorry… The tart is really good though…” “We are planning to have an Unbirthday party to make up for the last one… It was supposed to be today, but I put it off so you can come when you're better… If you want to.” “Will it be like the tea parties we imagined as kids? Where were together and can play and eat whatever we want?” “Yes, yes it will be just like the tea parties we had as kids.”

You tear up a bit. “I would love to.”

[hungermakesmonsters]

Love, Sick Love

Chapter Two

Plot summary : Working at one of the shadier bars in Brooklyn, you have one rule; don’t mess around with the patrons. Most of them are criminals, dangerous. None more so than Billy Russo, but Billy believes that rules are made to be broken. Especially your rule. One lapse in judgement is all it takes for Billy to decide that you’re his, and he’s never been the sort of man to take rejection well.

Pairing : Billy Russo x Reader

Story Rating : R 

Warnings : [This is a fic for 18+ only, minors DNI] Explicit, rough and dirty smut. All chapters will deal with dark and smutty themes, including but not limited to stalking. Please check the warnings on each chapter if you choose to follow this story. 

Word Count : 5.2k

A/N : This one goes from 1 to 100 very quickly 😅 .

CHAPTER ONE

Master List

Chapter Two

He followed you into your apartment without comment or question. His eyes stayed fixed on you, either because of disinterest in his surroundings or because he was too focused on you to care. Billy watched as you shrugged off your jacket and threw it onto the sofa and proceeded to kick off your boots.

Modest was a nice word for your apartment, empty was another. Aside from basic furnishings, there wasn’t much there. You didn’t even own a TV. From the look of the place anyone would have been forgiven for assuming you had just moved in or you were getting ready to move out. The sad truth of the matter was that it was neither.

But Billy didn’t seem to care.

You led him into the kitchen, trying not to look at him, trying not to think too much about how you’d let a man you didn’t know the first thing about into your home. Without a word, you grabbed a couple of clean glasses (the only two you owned) but, as you leaned down to get the vodka bottle from one of the lower cupboards, your back ached and you let out a hiss of pain.

“You okay?” He asked, stepping closer as you stood back up. 

“Fine,” you answered automatically.

“You're so full of shit,” he said, a hint of annoyance slipping into his tone. “Lemme see.”

It wasn't a question and Billy didn't wait for an answer before pulling at the back of your top, revealing tender, bruised skin. You pulled away from him almost instantly, knocking his hand away.

“I said it's fine.”

“I'm just trying to help,” he told you, barely holding back his irritation.

“It's not your problem.” 

He looked ready to say something, like he was ready to argue with you, but he seemed to think better of it and, instead, just offered a shrug. You kept your eyes on him for a second more before returning your attention to pouring drinks for the both of you.

His fingers met yours as you handed him the glass and he held you there for a moment, his eyes fixed on yours, filled with a wanting that stoked a heat in your stomach. Once he released your hand, you knocked back your drink, hoping to quell the feeling but it only seemed to get worse.

Billy sipped his drink slowly, his eyes not leaving you.

“What?” You finally asked.

“What?” 

“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” You asked, pouring yourself another drink.

“You know why,” Billy answered without hesitation, completely unashamed and unembarrassed.

And you did know. At least, you knew enough; he wanted you. You just weren't sure why.

“You don't even know me.”

You didn't expect that to get a laugh from him.

“Well, at the moment I don’t even exactly know myself,” he said with another one of those awkward one-sided shrugs. “At least... not the last few years.”

Your expression softened and you gave him a confused look.

“What do you mean?” You asked, even though you had an inkling. “What happened?” 

“Your guess is as good as mine.” Somehow, he seemed almost amused by it, but there was a discomfort in his smile that said more than his words ever could. 

“You don’t remember anything?”

His head shook. “No, but I figure that’s probably for the best.”

“How?” You asked, struggling to follow his chain of logic (if, indeed, any logic at all was involved in his thought process).

“Look at me,” he said, and you did, only not at his scars. You got lost in his eyes again. “Whatever did this to me probably wasn’t good, so I don’t know if it’s something I want to remember.” He was silent for a moment, then; “makes us kinda perfect for each other though, doesn’t it?”

“How?”

“You don’t want anyone to know you, and I can’t remember who I really am...”

“I don’t -” you started to defend yourself, hating that he’d managed to read you so easily.

He took a step towards you, halting the moment he noticed you tense. You weren’t sure why you did, you didn’t think he was a threat or that he’d hurt you, but something about him made you nervous. You didn’t trust yourself with him. That was the problem. Every time he looked at you, every time your eyes met his, you felt butterflies in your stomach.

“I’m sorry if I scared you earlier,” he offered softly, though it didn’t sound like he was sorry for his actions, just the fact that you’d been around to witness it.

And you weren’t sure if that made it better or worse.

“I’m not afraid of you,” you told him, defiant. 

Lifting your glass, you took a slow drink, not wanting to give away the effect that he had on you. The cheap vodka burned its way down the back of your throat, stoking the warmth in your belly, a warmth that only seemed to burn hotter when he looked at you. And it wasn’t long before the heat was spreading down to your core.

“You should be,” he said, quietly, darkly.

“Why?” You asked, refusing to show anymore weakness in front of him. “Are you dangerous?”

“Oh, kitten, you’ve got no idea...” he answered, the grin on his lips causing your breath to catch.

“Kitten?” You repeated, unimpressed.

“You’ve got sharp claws and no sense of danger, but you’re so soft and fragile...”

It should have been your cue to say goodnight, to thank him for helping you and walking you home, and show him to the door. But it felt like things between you had shifted again and part of you wanted to see where it would lead.

You finished your drink and he did the same, his every reason for being there disappearing with that last mouthful, but he didn’t move or offer to leave. And you didn’t ask. You didn’t want him to go. At least, not yet.

“But I think you like the danger,” he offered, his voice quiet but certain. The grin on his lips grew and your thighs clenched. “I think it turns you on.”

Silence fell. You couldn’t bring yourself to deny it, not when his gaze dropped to your cleavage, watching the awkward rise and fall of your breasts beneath your tank top, pebbled nipples pressing through the fabric.

“Oh, really?” You rolled your eyes and stood a little straighter. “And what makes you think that?”

“‘cause you invited me in,” he started, “‘cause you haven’t asked me to leave yet, even though you’ve seen what I’m capable of.”

“You haven’t seen what I’m capable of,” you countered, not sure why you were indulging him.

“You shouldn’t tempt me, kitten. You might not be able to handle what you get...” Billy warned, smirking as his eyes moved to your chest again as you drew a deep breath.

There was something in the way he looked at you, something that felt almost predatory but found that you didn’t mind it. It was nice to have someone look at you that way, like his world would end if he couldn’t have you. You wondered when he was last touched, when he last remembered being touched. The scars on his face still seemed fresh and, even though he did a good job of hiding it, the trauma he’d been through seemed fresher still even if he couldn't remember it.

As he held your gaze, Billy dared to step closer, watching every flicker of emotion to cross your face. Trepidation, curiosity, arousal, and fear. You felt at war with yourself, the heat in your stomach and a throbbing between your thighs wanted one thing, while your brain and common sense wanted something else entirely. You barely knew him and had no idea what he was capable of, or what he was involved with.

His tongue slipped across his lip and your heart lurched in your chest. Neither of you had spoken in going on a minute, both of you were just staring, waiting to see if the other would make the first move.

Billy cracked first, taking that final step, his body pressing you back against the counter while his hand slipped around the back of your neck, pulling your lips to his. It was everything you expected from him; a domineering kiss that took far more than it gave, his tongue unceremoniously pushing its way into your mouth when your lips parted to let out a whimper of pain at the way your back was forced against the counter.

But any discomfort you felt was quickly forgotten and you lost yourself to the kiss, indulging in whatever this was, losing yourself in the sort of kiss you’d never experienced before. The men you saw were normally so gentle with you, and you’d always told yourself that that was what you wanted but Billy was already making you question everything.

He shrugged out of his jacket, letting it fall to the floor. The kiss continued until your hand moved to his face, your fingertips grazing one of the more prominent scars. He inhaled awkwardly and let out a low, animalist rumble from the back of his throat.

His fingers gripped your wrist, wrenching your hand away from his face and he pulled back a fraction to stare at you. Anger and anguish warred for place in his expression, his hold on your wrist so tight that it was almost painful. It should have scared you but, somehow, it didn’t. In fact, it sent a thrill through you.

“Do they hurt?” You dared to ask.

He didn’t say anything. It didn’t seem like he could. It was as if he was caught in the grip of something he didn’t know how to escape, something he couldn’t verbalise or come to terms with. Trauma that he didn’t know how to handle. As he looked at you, you looked right back, finally letting yourself look at his scars.

Even with his face marked and marred, there was more than a hint of handsomeness. It hadn’t been a lie when you’d said he was fuckable, but now you were really looking at him, you could tell that he’d been beautiful before whatever had happened to him. And, maybe that just made it worse for him.

“They don’t bother me,” you told him, trying to wrestle him from whatever thought had him in its grips.

When he didn’t respond, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his scarred cheek, trailing kisses along the raised mark. His chest shuddered against yours and he let out a ragged exhale. You took that as a sign to continue kissing his scars. When he seemed settled, you dared run your tongue over one of them, and Billy came to life again.

His lips captured yours, reasserting his dominance over the moment and over you. If the way he kissed you hadn’t been enough to tell you that he wanted you, the way his body pressed against you certainly did. As he moved closer you felt his erection through his jeans, pressing against your hip.

But you didn’t have time to think about it, not when his free hand started to trail up your thigh, taking the fabric of your skirt with it. The more he kissed you, touched you, the harder it became to hear the little voice of reason in your head. He was dangerous. Violent. You didn’t know the first thing about him. His other hand was still gripping your wrist, holding you in place. There were so many obvious red flags, so many reasons not to do this, but none of those reasons were enough to stop the way you trembled under his touch.

He parted your legs with his knee, and you let him. You let his hand slip higher and higher beneath your skirt and between your legs, despite knowing what he’d find. Another dark and possessive sound rumbled in through his chest as his fingers grazed the lace of your thong and he cupped you through the increasingly wet scrap of fabric.

“If I’d known this was all you were wearing under your skirt, I would’ve saved us both some time and bent you over the bar,” he muttered against your lips, as if he was angry that he waited so long to have you. The combination of his words and the press of his fingers pulled an eager gasp from you. “You like that? You like the thought of me bending you over the bar and fuckin’ you hard?”

“Yes,” you whined without thought or hesitation.

As if rewarding your honesty, Billy slipped his fingers beneath the fabric and finally touched you, his long fingers trailing through your arousal. His teeth nipped at your lip and the sudden pain caused you to let out another gasp, a gasp that became a moan as his finger slid between your walls.

“Already so wet for me,” he said in a low voice, his lips lingering close to yours but pulling back every time you tried to reignite the kiss. “Knew this was turning you on.”

You reached for the bulge in his pants, palming his cock through denim. 

“I’m not the only one,” you muttered, sounding a little out of breath.

As he grinned, you took the opportunity to kiss him, shutting him up before he could say anything else. Already you could tell that his dirty mouth was going to be your undoing, and you wanted this to last. Your legs trembled beneath you like they might buckle at any moment, but you didn’t care. His fingers finally released your wrist and you were able to grip his sweater at his waist.

A second finger slipped inside you and your head fell back, a needy moan erupting from you.

“Mmm purr for me, kitten,” he groaned.

At any other time you would have rolled your eyes, but the way he was touching you, the way he was making you feel. It was as if he’d already made himself intimately familiar with your body, as if he knew exactly how to draw pleasure from you. His fingers bent and scissored inside you and you cried out again, already feeling an orgasm starting to build, the wet heat of your body clenching around him in anticipation.

You didn’t notice the knife until you heard it ripping through the fabric of your tank top from bottom to top and, by the time you realised it was happening, it was too late to stop it. The fabric parted, exposing you, but before you could think to protest, his head bowed and his lips started to press kisses along your breasts.

Arching your back, you leaned into his touch, completely giving yourself over to him. His lips closed over your nipple, sucking and nipping at the hardened peak, while the hand between your legs continued to move, fucking you with his fingers.

Every touch was rough, assertive, dominant. Taking, not giving, making demands of your body. Everything you thought you hated, everything you thought you never wanted But, now that you had it, it felt so good that you could only want more. It was like he was awakening a side of you that you hadn’t realised existed, a side that craved a man like Billy; a man who knew exactly what he wanted.

By the end of the night, you knew you were going to be covered in the marks of his affections; bruises where he’d gripped too tight, hickies and bite marks where he’d gotten too excited. But you didn’t care. You actually wanted him to keep going, to be rough, to take what he wanted from you. 

“Your tits have been driving me crazy all fuckin’ night,” he groaned, running his tongue around your nipple in a way that had you clenching around his fingers, and then -

You saw stars, coming harder than you had in a long time, and the fact that it was on his fingers had you wondering just how explosive the main event was going to be. Your whole body shook and, if he hadn’t wrapped an arm around you, you were certain you would have crumpled to the floor, a trembling wreck.

Rendered speechless by the pleasure he’d forced your body through, you could only watch as his hand lifted from between your legs and his fingers slipped into his mouth. His eyes closed and he groaned as he sucked his fingers clean.

Just the sight of it had your cheeks warming. Maybe Jenna had been right, maybe this was what you’d been missing out on.

“I need a proper taste,” he groaned before lifting you onto the counter.

Without prompting, you parted your legs and pulled up your skirt, hoping to save it from the same fate as your top as the knife appeared in his hand again. You felt the cold blade against your thigh for the briefest of seconds as he cut away your thong. It shouldn’t have turned you on - none of this should have turned you on - but you felt yourself tremble and clench in anticipation.

“Look at that,” he groaned, brushing his thumb over your still-sensitive folds before parting them with his fingers. “Prettiest little cunt I’ve ever seen.”

He continued to tease you for at least another minute, paying more attention to your pussy than any man had in years. Your cheeks continued to warm and you felt like you should be ashamed, but there was no denying your arousal and the way his attention had you desperate for him.

“You’re practically dripping for me,” he groaned, his slight and teasing touches becoming too much for you to bear.

“Then do something about it,” you answered back.

Your words seemed to break whatever spell he was under, and he looked back up to meet your eyes, the grin on his lips almost turning sinister. He leaned down, the wet heat of his mouth finding the wet heat of your body. There was no teasing, no slow build up. His tongue slid through your arousal in quick, greedy swipes, like he was trying to devour you, like he was trying to make you lose your mind.

And it was working.

“Please,” you begged, leaning back against the wall and pressing yourself against his eager mouth as his tongue circled your clit. “Oh, fuck, Billy...”

The scratch of his facial hair against your thighs added to the roughness of the moment, and your pleasure. You’d only just come for him but you already felt another orgasm starting to build inside you. It shouldn’t have been so shocking but you couldn’t remember the last time a man had made you come more than once in a night (if they even managed to make you come at all).

He pulled your legs over his shoulders, almost causing you to slide off the counter, pulling you against his hungry mouth in a way you couldn’t escape - not that escape had even crossed your mind.

Your body was thrumming with pleasure, every stroke of his tongue causing you to tremble and moan. Your hands gripped the sides of his head, his hair buzzed too short for you to pull on, keeping him held against you as you came. Though it quickly became clear that Billy didn’t need holding in place, he had no intention of pulling away, his tongue continuing to lap against you until you had to beg him to stop.

He didn’t even give you a chance to come down from your high before scooping you off the counter. Your arms and legs wrapped around him, clinging to him as he navigated your apartment with ease, finding your bedroom without help while you tugged off his sweater.

Billy dropped you onto the bed and, this time, you saw him pull out the knife, the blade appearing from the handle. But before you could say anything, it was tearing through your skirt.

“Hey -” you started but stopped as he looked at you, folding the blade and dropping it back into his pocket.

“You know how many guys wanted to fuck you in the little skirt tonight?” He asked, though you were certain he didn’t want an answer.

Was he jealous? Is that what had caused all of this? Just some petty jealousy?

“Apparently I have that effect on men,” you answered back.

Rather than responding, he started to undo his belt, then his jeans. You took in the sight of him in the dim light, your eyes dropping as his pants and boxers did. You got your first glimpse of his cock, hard and standing to attention, but he didn’t give you time to appreciate it before crawling onto the bed on top of you.

Your heels pressed into the mattress as his hips lowered to meet yours, grinding the length of his cock against you. A desperate moan tore from your lips, needy and eager for more.

“Top drawer,” you managed to gasp with the last shred of your sanity. “Condoms.”

Billy made that sound again, that rumbling in the back of his throat, an animalistic sound that sent sparks of desire through you. It was almost enough to change your mind and let him fuck you bare like he obviously wanted, but you weren’t that stupid. You’d known him for less that forty-eight hours and what you were doing was already risky enough.

His eyes left you long enough to reach into the drawer and retrieve a condom, tearing the wrapper open with his teeth and quickly setting about rolling it down his length. You couldn’t help but glance down, between your bodies, to look at him, biting your lip in anticipation. When he was ready, he tapped his cock against your swollen and sensitive clit, causing your breath to catch.

Your lungs burned as you held onto that breath, biting down on your lip even harder as you felt his sheathed tip starting to stretch your dripping slit as he slid inside you. You finally exhaled sharply once he’d pushed past that first inch of resistance and started to fill you at a leisurely pace you were certain wouldn’t last.

“Fuck. I knew you’d be tight,” he muttered, grinning down at you. “I knew this sweet little cunt wasn’t getting used enough. Don’t worry, that’s gonna change.”

He looked down at you, expecting a response but you simply returned to biting your lip, overwhelmed by the promise in his words and the feel of his cock filling you.

“What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue? Don’t tell me I’ve already fucked the attitude out of you,” he joked, “I’m just getting started.”

“Fuck you,” you managed to groan between panted breathes.

Billy laughed. “You first, kitten.”

As you opened your mouth to respond, his hips jerked forwards, driving the last couple of inches of his cock into you in a way that had your eyes almost rolling back.

“Fuck,” you whined as he stilled, every hard inch of himself buried between your trembling walls. Your back arched, head pressed back against the pillow, and your hips desperately shifted trying to adjust to the size of him.

“Next time, I’m fucking you bare,” he muttered in your ear, and you couldn’t tell if it was a promise or a threat, but the rough, dark tone of his voice was enough to make your walls flutter and clench around him. “Gonna make you feel the cock you’re gripping so tight, kitten.”

His hips drew back before you could even think to respond, almost pulling out completely before slamming back inside you, tearing a desperate cry from your lips. Then he started to fuck you, rough and hard, setting a pace that he wanted and not stopping to check if it was okay with you.

(Fortunately, it was more than okay with you.)

“You like that, don’t you?” He asked, knowing you couldn’t answer between the moans and ragged breaths he was already drawing from you. “You like being fucked hard. You’re gonna be able to feel me inside you for the rest of the week...”

Wrapping your arms around him, you tried to hold on as he took complete control. Your nails tore into his back but Billy didn’t seem to care about  or even notice any pain you were causing. In fact the way you were holding him only seemed to spur him on, and he soon lost himself in the roughness of the moment.

Your hands shifted, one of them pressing to his shoulder, fingernails biting into skin, and Billy tensed. It wouldn’t occur to you until later that it was the shoulder that had been seemingly causing him discomfort earlier - you were too out of your mind to even think about that.

Suddenly his fingers were on your wrist, taking hold of one hand, then the other, pulling both of them up until they were pressed into the pillow above your head. One hand was all it took to hold your slender wrists in place, effectively pinning you beneath him. He barely even slowed as he restrained you and, once he had you pinned, his thrusts became harder, the sound of his body meeting yours filling the room.

You’d never experienced anything like it before. You’d never wanted anything like it before. Never once in your life had you thought you were the sort of person who’d enjoy being completely at the mercy of some man you barely knew, letting him fuck you however he wanted, but you were enjoying it. You were loving it.  

Your mouth fell slack and you gave up on trying to hold back the sounds that were desperate to escape you; his name, guttural moans, and pleas for more, for him not to stop.

Pulling, you tested his grip on you, causing his hand to tighten on your wrists. You gave another tug, wanting to push your luck just to see what he’d do.

“Don’t make me tie you down, kitten,” he groaned, starting to get breathless. “Be a good girl for me.”

He kept you pinned, kept taking everything that he wanted from you, pushing you higher and higher. You almost wanted to struggle against him again, just to see if he really would tie you down but, even in your fucked-out state, you weren’t willing to trust him that much.

You cried out his name as you suddenly came again, your body shivering and shaking, completely overwhelmed by him.

Bill pulled out, leaving your body trembling and clenching around nothing. For a moment you thought that he was done, that it was over - and, honestly, you would have been more than satisfied if it was.

Instead you found yourself rolled onto your stomach before he pulled you up on all fours. A mindless cry tore from you as his cock filled you again and he started to fuck you from behind. Try as you might to lift your head, you felt boneless and exhausted, completely undone by Billy. But then you felt his fingers in your hair, pulling, tugging, forcing you to turn and look at him. He wanted you to see him.

“That’s it, kitten, let me watch you lose your mind,” he groaned as your eyes struggled to focus on him.

Every rough thrust forced a moan from you, each louder than the last. His free arm slipped around your waist, holding you tight, making sure you stayed exactly where he wanted you.

Your own arms shook and trembled as you tried to support yourself, and your back arched more and more with every drive of his hips, wanting to feel him as deep as he could get. You felt drunk, and not from the vodka you’d necked. You were drunk on the moment, on him, on his cock, and on every filthy word that left his lips. You’d never been with a man who’d treated you in such a raw and carnal way.

“You’ve creamed all over my cock, kitten,” he grunted, his hips slamming forward in a way that made your eyes roll back.

It didn’t make sense, you couldn’t understand how he’d managed to stoke a fire inside you that burned brighter and hotter with every passing second. Is this what you’d been missing out on by only picking safe guys?

“B-Billy,” you gasped.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, breathless and grinning, not slowing for a second. “Gonna come for me again?”

You couldn’t answer, whatever you’d wanted to say to him had left your head just as quickly as it had entered. All you could do was moan in response, your body quickly giving in to him again.

He let go of you as he came, letting you fall forwards onto the mattress, continuing to fuck you. His thrusts turned frenzied, fucking you into the bed as he chased his own orgasm.

Your body was trembling so much when another orgasm hit, that it barely even registered that he pulled out and rolled you onto your back again. Hazy, half-shut eyes looked up at him as he knelt over you, pulling the condom off and quickly starting to jerk his hand along his cock, finishing himself off.

A low grunt spilled from him as he started to come, and you felt it sputter onto your stomach and chest, and up your neck. Your eyes met his when you felt his thumb on your chin, urging your mouth open, and you let him slip the tip of his cock between your lips to swallow the last few spurts of cum.

Your tongue ran over his tip a couple of times, earning another low groan from Billy and one last little trickle of cum. His chest was heaving as he looked down at you, seeming like he was lost for words for the first time in his life. All he could do was let out a breathless laugh as he collapsed beside you.

It felt like you couldn't have moved even if you’d wanted to. You felt humiliated, dirty and degraded, overwhelmed and - and you’d enjoyed it. You'd loved it. It was the best sex you’d ever had. Your body was still thrumming with pleasure, trembling from his rough treatment, and it didn’t feel like it would ever stop. You’d never experience anything like it before. You’d never felt so good, so alive. Suddenly, you understood what you’d been missing out on.

“Jenna wasn’t kidding, you really did need someone to fuck your brains out,” Billy said with a contented sigh.

You barely had the strength to swat him with your hand. All you could do was take a series of slow breaths as your body slowly came down from the heights he’d pushed it to.

Your eyes closed but, before you could fall asleep, you felt him wipe you clean with the tattered remains of your skirt. Then he pulled you towards him, holding you tightly, possessively, in a way that you hadn’t expected. In fact, you’d expected him to leave once he’d gotten what he wanted from you. Instead, you fell asleep in his arms, held against his chest like this was anything more than a meaningless one night stand.

The last thing you remembered before falling asleep was the press of his lips against your forehead.

End Note : I shocked myself and let Billy go feral in chapter two this time 😅 From here on out things are going to start getting darker.

Thank you so much for the positive response to chapter one, I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much! As always your comments/likes/reblogs/asks/general screaming is always appreciated. I hope you all have an amazing weekend!

Let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters! If tagging doesn't work for some reason (aka Tumblr being dumb) I post most Fridays around 7:30 gmt (and on AO3 at some point in the hours after).

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