#I'm gonna end up listening to this song on repeat

[jadedshadow394]

Haven't seen the "I want you to be angry" one!

Three more I snagged from this post ; https://www.tumblr.com/antimony-medusa/767873484974112768/the-fast-clips-in-tommys-new-music-video

hey so tommy innit made a new song. and it's pretty solid. but whats most fucking damage-inducing thing was the hidden messages. there's a lot. but the most important ones that makes me want to throw up is:

i'll include the others gathered so far in a rb. but i just. i need people to take a minute and read these. for those curious others will be in a rb. but.

please remember that tommy, in not the same way, was a victim of his shit too.

[saintaviator]

moar hl scraps…. does a pose

[transfennecbuddy]

So apparently I'm on an Azari binge? Cause I just found Shadow Shadow by Azari?? I mean, it's freaking good and I'm not mad, but I'm sensing the beginnings of a trend, lol.

Anyways! I just have to say! This song starts off good! Like, it's slow-ish at first (can't really say slow since it's still kinda poppy and I'm still grooving) but then it just commits to a real boppy beat and that made me love it already!! I love songs with a nice quick beat and this doesn't disappoint!! And I love the music in this song! Something about the underlying notes just makes it even better. It's like—and I apologize in advance but this is the only way I can think to describe it—it's like the first note is nothing much on its own, but then the second adds something similar to the futility in Reincarnation Apple (by PinnocchioP) but less sad, like you're being chased and your pursuer knows you can't escape and is gloating about it. And it's so raw, so nakedly triumphant and scornful and derisive that it feels visceral. And the third note carries some of that same energy but just less heightened, and the fourth both brings the series back to the original note and is mocking again, like "Of course you can't escape, you dumb dumb" but smug and from the pursuer's point of view. (I... may have listened to this song too much, lol. Also, with this context, the clapping at the beginning sounds like an audience watching your demise, as emotionally detached from you and what's actually happening as someone watching TV!) It all is SO GOOD, I love it so much and that little series of notes going down then coming back up slowly has so much in it that I keep replaying this song to soak in all those emotions and in that moment. Like you can try to encapsulate just how it makes you feel but you can't quite express those feelings and they never quite fully soak in so you keep replaying the song to try to fully experience the music, but again it feels a little like some of it is sliding off like water on a duck's feathers and repeat cycle. This is the kind of music I get stuck in my head for days, that I literally bop to until I have to listen to it outside of my head! This is the music that feels like getting close to pure bliss!! MM!

BUT THEN. THIS SONG GETS BETTER! It switches to a slower, more defined bop, and GOSH it's BEAUTIFUL. Like, it feels like a heartbeat, literally just beating in my chest, taking over my whole train of thought, and dictating the mood and speed in which I exist. But sometimes it swirls into a smooth curl of a thing (like instead of sharply there bass beats, it's the lyrics swirling around the straight line that the beats lay out), WHICH ADDS. SO MUCH SWAG. And it's so swaggy, it's so self-assured and smug, that I cannot help but dance! And this is something that you can't do a choreographed dance to (not literally, but like when you first hear it, you're too filled with emotions to try and do a choreographed dance) so every movement is just an expression of the pure joy this song brings. And again, you try to define the beats and the emotion you feel with your movements, but you can't translate all of it. (This is another good part of the song. c:) This song is so good that it takes over a part of my soul!!

BUT THEN the song gets FASTER ohmygosh. And there's no lyrics or anything to define, so you can just extremely bop your head and get out all of the undefined emotion the rest of the song caused. (Like, I bopped my head so hard that my glasses fell off. Multiple times. Eventually I just left them there and picked them up after.) And then the lyrics come back!! And the note progression!! And it all feels so chaotic and full and quick like you're running for your life!!! I love!!!

And then, finally, the song must end. All of the extra instrumental leaves and the applause comes back and it's just the lyrics and a bit of the beat. And then it all falls off entirely and vanishes, leaving me disappointed and switching the loop feature on to hear it again.

(ALSO! When I first heard this song in full, I listened to the automatically created YouTube topic video thing, where an artist is a topic and any song made and/or sang solely by them is added to that extra channel. You know the thing, right? Hopefully, cause I don't have a better explanation. Anyways, so I listened to the actual video for this tho and the art?? Is so good??? I love it ohmygosh it's beautiful MM!)

So lol, guess I found a new (one of my) favorite song(s). And yes, I got a lil obsessed with this song after listening if you couldn't tell. This was the song I was talking about last week. (...I really should make a playlist for all the songs that make me feel like I'm feeling the gates of heaven, hm.) Anyways, seems I might be checking out a few more of Azari's songs maybe! I kinda hope! But I must go now! Writing this reminded me that this song existed (after I found another good song last week, hence why I forgot to actually write this ( -. _-. ) ) so I shall now be doing my homework to this song shortly!! Seeya!

[thebeautifulfantastic]

47!

47. "Secret for the Mad" by dodie

[lovebvni]

repetition (a pick-a-pile)

in honor of my friends kai ( @klxudykai )and nile (who doesn’t want to be tagged), i want to do a little pap! this will be black white and purple themed for them too (their pfp colours)

i know both of them are going through cycles of repeating their actions over and over, and it is hard for them. i know it’s frustrating — hell i hate repetition. but you find peace in it.

this pick-a-pile is just advice for your manifesting and/or shifting journey. there is no real theme, but i asked spirit to bring up something you need to repeat for each pile.

this pap is intuition and shufflemancy-based. i am not using tarot nor cards at all for this. this is also for entertainment purposes. take my words with a grain of salt AND please do not use this as legal or life advice.

now, inhale and exhale. believe in your intuition, and pick a picture.

[1 ; 2

3 ; 4]

pile 1 the spiral.

hi pile 1! here’s confirmation for your pile : cycles, crying, cynical, the letter c (in your name of in the name of your significant other. casey and clark stand out.), puns, clairaudience, crown, clowns, (a lot of words w the letter c jesus christ..), underwater, drowning, sinking, the sea, oceans, water (s), fix your face, black, sexism, activist, reality shifter, cyclones, spirals, “i feel like im not seeing any signs/progress”

well pile one, you could feel like you are stuck in a cycle. just a torpedo and you’re getting hit with the same things over and over. you’re wondering why things aren’t changing, why this won’t end, but it’s because YOU won’t change. this is the harshest i think i have ever been in a pick a card, but you really need to get over yourself. realize you aren’t the person you should be, throw that person away and reinvent yourself. you want a lot in life, and you aren’t going to get it if you don’t decide to change yourself. the universe chose you for a reason, but if you keep having your own pity party, you aren’t gonna get anywhere. stop getting mad when you’re being told the truth. it isn’t there to hurt you. it’s there to help you. the truth is a tool. and as long as you keep ignoring it, you keep hiding from the monster inside your closet, it’s never gonna leave. it’s gonna haunt you. it’s like a negative spirit. lure it out and keep it coming. it is gonna hurt, but it’s worth it.

your required repetition is “continue to listen and change yourself. transformation.”

the waiting season is one where you need to work, don’t keep sulking.

now to interpreting your song, her by poppy. you have been trying to be someone else that you are not, for someone else. the chorus

“I'm getting to know her And all of her anger You won't recognize her If you encountered I'm getting to know her And all of her anger Picked herself up Put her back together”

you need to change and you know it, and you don’t know how. start with your anger, your sadness, a strong emotion and unravel it. unwrap it like a gift. keep pulling to you get to the root of the cause — hold it.. nurture it… and get the mud off it.

see this as a new start, pile one. i love you. you need to know you’re strong, and you can do this. don’t get annoyed, because i know you’ve been told this before. fix your face.

pile 2 ghouls

hello pile 2! here’s confirmation this is your pile!!: fairies, love, purple, green, heart chakra and third eye chakra, shadows, “on a silver platter”, polite, scars, romance, sacred, girl blogger, skull and bones, doja cat, fear of success, screaming, pink, sexuality, white, sensuality, fire and ice, opposites, blood, self sabotage, royalty, alternative, goth, knight, disability, multilingual, this specific dynamic, vampire

simplicity. simplify everything. that’s all spirit is saying. don’t over complicate things. that’s like all spirit is saying u guys 😭😭

they r literally saying clear your mind, just be the person you are meant to be. listen to your intuition, be creative, have love in your heart, even when times are hard, and let emotions flow.

spirit told me your manifestations are actively coming in 😭😭 idek why you’re reading this pac! like there are no notes, nothing else you need to do. just listen to your intuition and be in tune with yourself. god i love this pile bc yall r js so sweet and light hearted — like there’s so much hidden positivity here that’s waiting to come out.

good job on how far you’ve come, and hav fun where you’re going! love you pile 2!

pile 3 — unclear memory

hi pile 3! here’s your confirmation: “even a worm will turn”, disappointment, ditsy, protector, big eyes, proposal, hobbit core, hermitcraft, minecraft, silence, under another’s control, blush, light colours (pastels), resting, new opportunities, distractions, distant, chapell roan, wlw.

you’re over possessive but you cut out your heart. or someone else cut it out. you need to get your priorities straight. there’s so much going on in your brain. they all lead to the same thing, don’t they? like how a spider web meets in the middle.

you’re sad, i can tell, but you won’t let anyone know. you think you’ve done enough, or even too much, but in reality you’ve been distracted. you’re trying to hide your main in overworking. doing too much.

your repeating advice is “get back on track and focus on your morals”.

but dont become some else. become yourself. stop holding grudges. get yourself back.

pile 4 — kisses

hi pile 4! here’s confirmation this is your pile: shadow work, brooklyn nine-nine, wolf pack, furry, july, suicidal but continuing, height difference, jumbled thoughts, flowers, blue and pink, wash off the makeup, ombré, counting crows poem.

this is my dogs favorite song 😭😭

pile four, you have been looking for outer validation when you don’t need it. you’re searching for signs, for love, for confirmation you’re on the right path when you really jay need yourself. you’re putting yourself down and other people/the universe on a pedestal. YOU ARE THE UNIVERSE!! REALIZE THAT!

what you say goes. what you want will happen. and that’s that.

your advice is as follows ; “you need to just rest.”

and i think that’s great advice. sit down and relax. listen to music, meditate, be at peace. work on yourself. try journaling too!! it will help.

thank yall for reading!! <3 i hope this helps someone. finishing this at 5:55 pm btw!!

[coff33andb00ks]

Until You - Part Four

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four charles leclerc x female pop singer!reader x oscar piastri x lando norris f1 smau with intermittent scenes Summary: they drive vroom vrooms, she sings soulful tunes. there's no way in hell this is gonna work, right? Warnings: language, author lied when she said lando was just there (i promise she's not getting anymore men omg), implied smut playlist a.n: the next part will have a q&a with y/n on insta/tiktok so if anyone has questions they'd like for her to answer please send them to my inbox (as basic or unhinged as you like)

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc and others ynyln: SURPRISE!!! I present to you my new babies: Enchanted and Lover. Enjoy, my little lattes 💋❤️

↳user3: MY THOUGHTS WILL ECHO YOUR NAME            ↳ user4: omg these are what her and the driver guy were saying            ↳user5: DID SHE WRITE IT FOR OSCAR?!?!?! ↳oscarpiastri: Beautiful, love. 🧡            ↳ynyln: no you 🧡            ↳user4: omg ↳charles_leclerc: all's well that ends well to end up with you ❤️            ↳ynyln: I'll save you a seat, lover ❤️ ↳sabrinacarpenter: on repeat!!            ↳ynyln:❤️ ↳landonorris: love            ↳ynyln: thank you sweetie 🫶🏻 ↳user7: I'm here from f1, why does she call people little lattes?            ↳user8: welcome!! it's a term of endearment for her fans. y/n said in an interview that we give her comfort and a burst of energy, like a latte midafternoon, and it just stuck.

Lando nodded along with the beat. "It just needs a little something extra… You want to keep it acoustic?"

She nodded, sipping her tea. She looked astounded that he was there. He knew he was. When she'd texted him he hadn't expected he'd be on a flight to London within two hours. But here he was, sitting with her in her "little" basement studio, listening to her song for the fifth time, mouthing the lyrics she'd probably written with Charles or Oscar in mind. Charles and Oscar, who were upstairs sleeping soundly.

How I obsessively adore you That's what I do I believe, I believe, I could die in your kiss No, it doesn't get, doesn't get better than this

Oh to be obsessively adored by her.

"I'll do some piano, hang on." She leaned across him, invading his space with her gentle floral aroma and her soft hair and…

He sighed, staring at her in awe as she worked her magic at the keyboard. It was crazy that he was even here, in her private sanctum, witnessing what would undoubtedly be a hit as it was created.

"The piano's too prominent," he said, wanting to feel useful. "The guitar should be the main instrument."

Y/n nodded, and he reached to adjust levels, standing up and hitting play. She looked tense and tired and stressed and he instinctively moved to stand behind her, hesitating.

"Ok to touch you?" he asked.

She tilted her head to look at him. "Yeah of course."

He rested his hands on her shoulders, rubbing gently as the song played. "It's a good song, y/n."

"You think so?" she asked in a small voice.

"It's a love song. Hopeful and adoring. It's beautiful. Charles is a lucky guy."

She hummed, relaxing under his gentle touch. "What's he got to do with it?"

Oh. "I uh… Osc then."

She turned her head to look up at him. "It's not for him."

Oh. Oh. "Someone else?" Christ how many boyfriends did she have--

"You don't remember? You float across the room. It's what you said to me at the club after the race in--"

"Monaco," he whispered.

"It stuck with me. So did the kiss," she murmured.

He swallowed, continuing to rub her shoulders. "You didn't... When I sent you those videos I didn't know about Osc and Charles."

Y/n turned and his hands dropped. "What do they have to do with it?"

A nervous laugh rose in his throat. "You're dating them? Both of them, which is insane to me but like I get it. You're like a mouse on crack, you probably need two boyfriends to keep you from taking off—"

She laughed. "A mouse on crack? Really?"

Sighing as she stood up, he looked down at her. "I just… Don't want to mess up what the three of you have going on."

"They don't own me, Lando. I'm a grown woman, I can do what I want with my body whenever I want. With whoever I want."

Lando blinked, his mind short-circuiting over the mental image that put into his head. Swallowing hard, he drew in a breath as she stretched. And held it, staring at her while she fiddled with controls and restarted the song. Let it out slow when he saw the tension returning to her shoulders.

He was reaching for her before he even registered the movement.

"C'mere," he murmured, pulling her to him. Reaching behind her, he switched off the song. "You're gonna drive yourself crazy, love."

"It's right there, Lando, I just need to push a little harder," she groaned, holding her head in her hands and letting him draw her closer.

"Hey, hey, shh…" It felt natural to kiss the top of her head, to wrap his arms around her and try to calm her. "I'm not gonna let you go insane over a song. It's fine, I know you'll come up with something amazing. Just give it time."

"It's not just a song," she whined. "I'm absolutely shit at talking about my feelings for someone, you know? Especially when it…"

"Might go up in flames?" he whispered.

Her hands were on his chest, her head tilting up. "Did you have any idea what you were doing when you stole my number and texted me?"

"Honestly thought I was shooting my shot and hoping I'd get lucky," he muttered, grinning when she laughed.

"It worked."

"Huh?" Lando grunted in surprise.

"Got me thirsty. The past couple weeks have been crazy, trying to fight it, but god, Lando." She sighed as though to ease the tension but it was still there, her body still taut with stress and worry. "I honestly thought you came tonight to fuck me."

His mind bounced like a padel ball in an intense match. He wanted to comfort her, to get her to relax, to ease her worries about the song. But oh how he wanted to kiss her again. He could just remember their half-drunken kiss in Monaco, the electricity thrumming through him, his heartbeat matching the thumping bass of the music. Thought you came tonight to fuck me.

He blinked, his mind going back to a quiet moment before the race in Montreal, when Oscar had been telling him about the unconventional relationship he'd found himself in.

"We're just taking it day by day. But she has a lot of love to give, mate. Sounds crazy, but… I don't think one person could handle it all."

Was there even room for him? Was he honestly considering entangling himself in what would, probably, end up being a PR nightmare for the four of them?

Why was he even thinking of love when he'd originally just wanted to be able to say he'd fucked the richest woman in the world?

"I…"

He leaned down, one hand rising to cup the side of her head. It was supposed to be gentle, sweet, the type of kiss that deserved the song she was working on, but it was harsh, deep and demanding, and he was swallowing her moans. Her nails lightly scraped his neck then they were sliding over his scalp and he whimpered.

"I didn't," he gasped between kisses, growing needier with each taste of her, each moan that fell past her lips. She tasted of tea and chocolate. "I didn't come here to fuck you."

"I know," she moaned. She leaned into him and he felt the need, the flames licking at both of them.

"That's new," Oscar commented, chin resting on her shoulder while she poured herself a coffee. His fingers brushed the side of her neck.

Y/n felt her cheeks warm at the delicate touch, sparking the very recent memory of Lando's mouth on her. "Yeah…"

"Did you get any sleep?" he asked, kissing the mark, his arms snaking around her waist.

"Maybe an hour," she mumbled. After breaking the chair in her studio with Lando, she'd had a burst of inspiration, and the sun had been coming up when they'd listened to the finalized track.

"Love," he sighed, taking the coffee from her before she could take a sip.

"Babe," she whined, her mind snapping to the present, though part lingered on the memory of the twisted sheets of the guest room, of Lando's panting moans in her ear.

"I'll fix you something to eat, then you're going back to bed." He kissed the top of her head and moved away, drinking her coffee.

"I've got to—"

"You don't have anything scheduled for the day. Or tomorrow. So it's rest. No recording, no caffeine, rest." Oscar looked at her over his shoulder. "Stop pouting."

"I just wanted to spend the day with my boyfriends," she sighed, climbing onto the stool at the island counter. Wrinkling her nose when he poured a glass of orange juice and set it in front of her, she reluctantly took a sip.

"We can spend the day here. Peace and quiet, love."

She felt herself melt at his gentle words. Peace and quiet and them. For the whole day. She'd only had snatches of time with them since leaving Monaco. She'd had a concert the day of the Canadian grand prix, and now it felt like some sort of cosmic kismet that her mini break coincided with theirs. They couldn't be together for the whole time, but she would cherish the days she could have.

"Bonjour, mon couer, bonjour koala," Charles greeted as he entered the kitchen, rubbing his eyes.

Y/n saw Oscar's cheeks tinge pink at the affectionate nickname Charles had started using for him. She sipped her orange juice, looking on as Charles brushed by Oscar, his hand resting briefly on the small of his back, and heard the whispered word. Rousseur. Freckle.

God, she loved them. Oscar's freckles, Charles's nicknames, and them.

"Good morning," she murmured after he kissed her.

"You didn't tell me we would have a guest, mon couer," he murmured, moving to fix himself coffee.

Oscar turned from the cooktop. "Guest?"

"Oh. Yeah." Y/n rubbed her neck. "Lando flew in last night. Late."

"He's snoring in the guest room." Charles was chuckling. "Leo went to bother him."

"I texted him. About the song. I needed input, and you were both asleep and—"

"Lando came to help you?" Oscar's smile was soft.

"He did."

Oscar tipped his head, regarding her much like a cat watching a bird through the window. "Ah."

"Ah, what?" Charles asked, rubbing his eyes while he sipped his coffee. Lowering his hand, he looked at y/n, snorting into his cup. "Ah."

She groaned, slumping down onto the counter. "Is it that obvious?"

"Love, you're glowing." Oscar grinned and turned back to the eggs.

"I've been glowing since Monaco," she muttered against the countertop. Slowly, she lifted herself, eyes darting from Charles to Oscar and back again. "You're okay with it?"

"I already told you, mon couer. I don't mind sharing you." Charles's smile was affectionate. "As long as you're safe and he treats you well."

"He's one of my best mates, y/n. Not to mention he's been obsessed with you for ages," Oscar quipped, sliding a plate of eggs and toast in front of her.

"He's not obsessed," she snorted.

"Did he fly commercial or private?" Oscar asked, leaning against the counter.

Y/n sighed, taking a bite of the eggs. "Private," she mumbled.

"Day by day, love," Oscar said gently, leaning to kiss her forehead.

Liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri, landonorris, and others ynyln: rough night in the studio until this one came to lend a hand. magic: made. forever grateful, sweet Lando. Let's just enjoy the view tagged: landonorris ↳landonorris: thank you for giving me a chance. soz about the chair            ↳ynyln: chairs can be replaced. and you'll always have a chance while I'm around            ↳user4: aww wait what did he do to the chair??? ↳user3: lando was streaming with quadrant until 1am monaco time            ↳ user4: god did he fly out to help her? my heart            ↳user5: wait that's really sweet 🥺 ↳oscarpiastri: will you rest now?            ↳ynyln: yes darling            ↳user6: aww ↳charles_leclerc: I adore the new song, mon couer            ↳ynyln: it sounds better when you sing it ↳user7: omg did she collect another one            ↳user8: omg stooopppp 😂😂😂

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[bisonaari]

I don't know if it has been done here before because I don't look around, but I have thoughts about the album and I need to share them with someone or I'm gonna go INSANE

Put your tinfoil hats on for my analysis of everything around People's Champion under the cut (probably people have talked about it and I'm just gonna repeat stuff, be warned)

So I've been a bit insane about People's Champion and I've started to think super hard about the order of the songs. I think, in my opinion, that the songs are arranged to tell the story of his life and career from right after UMK 2023 until now.

Ready To Go: This is where we start. Just post UMK, people didn't fully believe in him yet. I remember people saying "oh yeah sweden is sending someone who already won esc, but we're sending… Jere from Vantaa????". Hence the chorus, where people want to see him fail. But he's ready, he knows that he can do it. He's gonna go through and give his EVERYTHING. The mood of the song is really hopeful, with big intense guitar.

Cha Cha Cha: Do I need to explain this one here? I'm still not over this hahaha, I don't think I'll ever be. But this is where events take a turn for him, hence why it's so early in the album, even though it's his biggest song. Because he has so much to say after Cha Cha Cha happened.

Takavoltti: This is where things start to fuck up. He doesn't want to stay on his butt now that he has achieved celebrity and starts to take on so many, many gigs. A lot of us were worried for his health when we saw how much he was performing during summer 2023. But in the song, he says that he only saw opportunities and he just had to continue to take them. It takes a toll on his body. It starts to hurt, but he goes through it. That mad man. Also a couple of times in the song, people ask him to do stuff. Like a little circus monkey. And he just ends up hurting himself.

Ruoska: The bad comments start to really get to him. In the video, Erika and Käärijä are both dressed and perform as aliens. They've completely been striped of their humanity. They're just gimmicks that you can insult anonymously on the internet. Who cares anyway, they chose this life for themselves. It's their own fault. While the previous song was still a bit on the funny side, this one digs straight into the hardships that they feel. There is no more humour, only pain.

Kot Kot: He's still doing too much. While everyone has gone home, he's still drunk on the dancefloor, trying to reach out for friends who were wiser and left. He's being dragged out of there against his will, because he's so stubborn. Pushing through isn't working anymore, and people around him aren't letting him hurt himself anymore.

Skit: An appointment with a therapist. Käärijä is being cut off CONSTANTLY by the therapist, who can't see Jere as a patient. He sees Käärijä, the star. Even when he's trying to seek help, he isn't listened to. Because he's not human anymore for people at that point.

Autiomaa: Käärijä is breaking down. In the video, the therapist from the skit is taking a picture of him during the appointment. The feeling of loneliness and emptiness is around him all the time, omnipresent, eating him alive. He just wants someone to see him as a person, to listen to him, to help him with the void.

Sex=Money: At that point, you know, might as well. You're not human anymore, who cares. Why not try to get some money selling your ass. Who's gonna care anyway, sex sells and that's what people want to see, right? He made so much money on onlyfans, the press is acting shocked that he would even do that. The song is back to a bit light-hearted. My interpretation would be that he just finds the situation ridiculous, and that's why we're getting humour back in the lyrics!

Bananas: I'm not sure how this one fits in my theory, but we're SO back for humour. Kääriä is getting better. I think that in this one he found resolve to just continue going on. He's annoyed because people still only see him as an object, but he has to go through and live his life. Show must go on.

Huhhuhhei: Quite interesting to put a love song in this timeline in the story. But I think it's because he wants to live in the present, and not in anxieties from the past and the fear of the future. He doesn't know if the person sharing his bed is still gonna be there in the morning, but whatever, it's not important. Tonight, they're his and that's what matters. Thinking of tomorrow isn't gonna bring anything good.

It's Crazy It's Party: He's still stuck in the parties, they're around him all the time. He's still doing a million gigs in Finland and in europe. And just as the song is quite close to Cha Cha Cha, he's back at the beginning, the situation hasn't changed much. But this time, by the end, he goes to the party again, by his own will. And this time, he has people around to party with him.

People's Champion: We're back babes. This song is a love letter to people who love him. This is a great wrap around for this album. He's just remembering how everything went, from the start, until this point. Going through every point and emotion we've been through with him during the album. But in the end, he IS people's champion. He did it. He made it. And even with all the hardships, he's with us, when our hearts all sing together. The last line of this album that isn't a chorus is "Thank you everybody, I love you".

What a journey

So something that you have noticed that I've talked a lot is how people don't recognize Käärijä's humanity. He has been made into a kind of creature of gimmicks. You can ask him everything, you can say everything to his face. Whatever, he's a celebrity, not a person.

And this is where that cover is a GENIUS move.

On the cover, there are NO gimmicks. No bolero, no bowl cut, no bare chest with a tattoo. Just his face. You HAVE to watch his face, there is nothing else to see. You have to watch his emotion being raw, he's crying. This is not a pleasant cover to see. And I know, I've had spotify open on his face all day friday while I was working, it felt awful. But it makes you do something.

You have to acknowledge his humanity. And there's no way around it.

I love Käärijä

[d1s1ntegrated]

i’ve been listening to this song on repeat and can’t get shiggy out of my head. can you please write something along these lines, cause oh my god would this be so hot🥵

porn star dancing shigaraki pov x stripper reader

summary: dabi drags shigaraki to a "titty bar" for his 21st birthday, because "being a virgin at 21 is like a dog who's never had a biscuit". 

cw: quirkless au! dabi and shiggy are best friends, drinking, strip club setting, shiggy's pov, alt!reader, oral virginity loss, language, nudity, oral (male rec), groping, whining, pining, slightsub!tomura, virgin!tomura, slightlydom!reader, teasing, private lap dance, happy ending lol, handjob, headshoving, dirty talk, basically just shiggy being an epic simp loser. wc: ~4230 words

this is from tomura's pov. i felt it would convey his sluttiness best :)

·̩̩̥͙＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚　　˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊·̩̩̥͙

"GET OFF THE GAME, DUMBASS. WE'RE GOING OUT". dabi's voice shouts from down the hall. i sigh and roll my eyes, yanking my headset off my head. usually, i'd ignore him, but i knew he wouldn't leave me alone today. i tried not to make a big deal about it, but he's been making a stink about my birthday for months now, as if drinking legally at a bar would feel any different than drinking illegally in my room. but, hell, if it gets him to shut up, i guess.

i groan and stretch myself out of my gaming chair, giving my prized possession a solemn goodbye, and trod out of my room. dabi is waiting in the hallway, leaning against the wall. "there you are, freak. you ready to go get wasted with a bunch of topless bitches?" he looks me up and down, smiling sadistically. i shrug, and he pats my shoulder.

"come on, lets get trashed." i know i can't argue with him, so i follow him out the door, thinking about how badly i'd rather go back to my room and play league. whatever.

---------------------------------------------------- the club is sketchy, to say the least. a dark grey exterior with no windows, just one neon sign above that reads "the silk iris" in flashy pink lettering. at least it's not named some weird shit like "vixen den".

i suck air in through my teeth as dabi lights a cigarette next to me. "can we go home?" i say miserably next to him. he chuckles, taking a long drag.

"fuck no, shigs. we're goin' in, and i'm gonna tell those pretty girlies in there that it's your birthday" he flashes his teeth at me and instead of a smile, i see a predator baring its fangs in warning. fuck my life. i try to beg him not to, but he's unreceptive.

"please, dabi, i'll go in, fine, but dont tell them shit, please" i clasp my hands together and shake them at him, as if im praying. but if dabi was a god, he was a cruel and evil one, who doesn't answer prayers.

"fine fine, shigaraki. i'll be nice, i promise." he curls his lips and tosses the finished cigarette to the ground, crushing the filter under his boot. he grabs my shoulder and guides me with an iron grip to the door. "lets go!" he slaps my back hard and i grimace. no going back now.

the door pushes open and immediately, the smell of heavy smoke and cheap cologne rushes my sinuses. theres another door between the club and the entrance, and a part of me wishes i could just sit in the lobby all night. but dabi whips his id out, and i reluctantly follow. we flash them at the bouncer, who nods and grins wide when he sees mine. "happy birthday man. have fun". his voice is gruff and deep, his body towering over mine. i force a slight smile, and nod "thanks" before begrudgingly going through the door.

the lights are low, thank god. deep reds and purples accent the darkly-painted walls, and the carpet is patterned with some vampiric-looking textile, and i study it intently. the music is so loud, the bass shakes my eardrums, and i groan. if i'm gonna be here all night, i'm gonna need a drink. dabi knows this already, and he drags me over to the bar and nods to an empty stool. i slink onto the worn leather and he yanks my hood off my head before he sits next to me. i grumble but he ignores me, and flags down the bartender.

a tall, slender girl in a very tiny bikini top struts over, big pearly smile on her face. her red hair curls gently around her face, and she greets us with a very peppy voice. "hi boys! what can i get for ya?"

dabi eyes the girl up and down and leans back in his seat a bit, giant smirk plastered to his face. his piercings tug at his lips as he answers, "hey doll. it's actually my buddy's birthday today," he claps my shoulder again and i shrink into myself, "what do you recommend?"

the girl claps her hands together and jumps a bit. "happy birthday sweetheart!" those teeth smile at me again, somehow wider than last time. she turns back to dabi and asks, "is this his first time?"

dabi answers with a bellowing laugh, "ohhh yeah. shig's gonna turn into a man tonight" he nudges me and i force out a laugh.

"well, shig," the bartender drags my name out sleazily, "i have just the thing for you." she trots away from us for a few moments, returning with a shot glass full of a bright green substance. "you like fruity drinks?" she asks and nods at me. i shrug and reply "i'm not sure". she lets out a high-pitched giggle and looks to dabi.

"and for you?""whatever's on tap, sweetheart. and a shot of jameson." his voice is low and he's still grinning. she returns half a second later with a tall beer glass, and a little shot of whiskey. she nods at us and says as she tends to another customer now, "ill start a tab for you boys."

i hesitantly pick up the shot glass and dabi picks his up with me. he raises his brows and laughs. "take the shot, pussy". he clinks his glass against mine and i take a deep breath as we take the first shot. it goes down surprisingly easy, much easier than the cheap whiskeys and vodkas i'm used to. its...actually fucking delicious. the bartender notices us and claps. she brings me another one a minute later and i take it fearlessly, the liquid shooting down to my core, warming me up. "thats a green tea shot, love. just in case you wanna order some more" she winks at me as she slides another shot to dabi, "my shift ends in about 5 minutes, so you'll have to order them yourself from now on! happy birthday, sweetie!" i smile at her, feeling my nerves slowly melting away. i thank her and turn to dabi.

"this isn't so bad" i give him a thumbs-up, and he returns it. he picks up the tiny glass and shoots it back, chasing it with the remainder of his beer. he blinks away the burn and shakes his head. "bartender was cute, eh?" he stifles a belch into his fist and claps my back again. "lets go, emo boy." i slide off the stool and follow him.

he leads me to a couple of seats near the stage. i did my best to avoid looking before, but now it was right in front of me. a couple of girls, about six or seven, were twirling around poles, walking up and down the stage, as men greedily shove their hands to touch them, stroke their legs, grab their asses. some shove dollar bills into their waistbands, others hand them bigger bills: tens, twenties, even some fifties. i scoff and take a seat next to dabi, who's already got his wallet out. he hands me a wad of ones, and i sigh.

"i'm not gonna shove my hands into some poor girls panties," i say to him. he glares at me and rolls his eyes. "the more you shove in there, the closer you get to having it, shig. its like buying pussy, bro. come on, just watch." he stands and leans over the stage as a short blonde crawls over, and he beckons her with a finger. he slides his hand over her barely-clothed tits and shoves a couple bills between them. she blows a kiss at him and stands, spinning around a pole and waving at a few of the men before the girls rotate. this goes on for a few minutes, and i feel myself growing uncomfortable with myself.

i grit my teeth and stand next to dabi, and do my best to entice one of the girls over to me. however, once the girl comes over to me, i panic, and end up just handing her a few of the bills in my hand. i wave and immediately smack myself in the face. stupid idiot, what the fuck was that? dabi notices my folly and laughs at me and shakes his head.

"you dumbass, what the hell was THAT?" he raises his voice over the music and i purse my lips.

"i dont know" i say quietly. my head is spinning from the alcohol. i groan and sit back in my seat, afraid to embarrass myself further. suddenly, the music quiets down, and a voice rings through the speaker, announcing a solo act. "please welcome the beautiful, the terrifying, the eat-your-heart-out....calypso!" the group of men cheer as they hear the name. i look confused as the lights switch to a deep sanguine red, and the music switches over from the bass-boosted r&b and rap to metal. a few of the men get up and go to the bar, but watch as they order drinks.

dabi gets up and i call out for him, but he raises a hand and says, "im getting drinks, dude chill! you'll be fine for two minutes!!" the lights brighten again as a girl comes onto the stage. she, like the others, is dressed scantily, but...differently. my eyes widen as she approaches further. she grabs one of the poles and swings her leg around it, and i can't peel my eyes away. her thigh grips the metal, her fishnets so tight against her, i can see the soft skin poking through the holes. the material stretches thin over her ass, which is plump, with only a tiny g-string to cover it. she drops to the floor and lays on her back, her tits spreading in the top as men grab at her, and she slaps them away. they cheer and lay the bills onto the stage, and she gradually grabs the money, shoving it down her top herself.

dabi returns and hands me another shot. i swiftly take it, not taking my eyes off the dancer on the stage. she wraps her hands around another pole and spins a few times before dropping back down, onto her knees this time. i bite my lip and dabi nudges me with his elbow.

"you like that one, shiggy?" he shouts over the heavy guitar solo. i nod slowly and watch her intently. he chuckles beside me and nods. calypso gets to the edge of the stage and i smack the rest of the ones i have in my hand right next to her tall, chunky boots. she notices me and stares down at me and licks her lips, and i feel myself melt. she bends over slowly and grabs the cash, and drags her long fingernail up my neck and jaw. i gulp as she winks at me and whispers something, but i cant hear her over the music.

i feel myself twitch in my pants. i smile weakly up at her and she turns away, collecting the rest of the money on the wooden floor. she then slowly grabs one of the strings of her top and pulls it, slowly unraveling the knot. she spins around as she pulls the top off completely, and tosses it haphazardly in my direction. i scramble up from my seat and grasp at it, unable to control my impulses. i greedily fist it and shove it into my hoodie pocket, hoping she doesn't notice who took it. i fling back in my seat and dabi high fives me.

"WOOOOO! ATTA BOY!" he shouts at me and downs the rest of his glass. i look back up to calypso on the stage, spinning around another pole sleazily. her movements are fluid and flawless, and i swallow the excess drool in my mouth as i watch her. the way her tits look, her supple curves, the jiggle of her ass against the metal and wood as she dances around the stage. none of the other women on the stage before had gotten my attention, but...she did. i cover my lap with my hands and spread my legs to hide the raging hard-on against my tight jeans.

the song ends after an excruciating few minutes and i let out the breath i didnt know i was holding. as she exists the stage, she drags a clawed hand against the mirror wall at the back of the stage. the whole crowd cheers, a few of the men going so far as to shout her name out. the next solo act comes out and i stand up, deciding to hide in the bathroom for a second. fuck, this doesnt look odd or anything.

i tap dabi's shoulder and tell him "i gotta piss, i'll be back" and he just nods as he stares intently at the next dancer.

i rush into the bathroom and slam the door behind me, locking the stall. i sigh and press myself against the shoddy stall door and yank the top i shoved into my pocket out. i press it to my face and inhale. my cock jumps in my pants as i do so, and i stifle a moan. it smells so sweet, and spicy, and just so fucking good. i palm at the front of my jeans as i inhale. fuck, her tits were in here. fuck. i rub my thumb over the soft material, imagining how it rubbed against her nipples, how the strings tugged at the weight of her tits. i shudder and shake my head, shoving the top back into my pocket. not here. i'll have all the time in the world to get off once i'm home, i remind myself. don't be the guy that jerks it in the public bathroom.

i gather myself as best as possible, splashing water on my face before exiting the bathroom. i shiver at the cold on my feverish face and push the heavy door open to see dabi standing outside, grinning maniacally.

"guess what, birthday bitch?" he tilts his head at me and chuckles. i stare with genuine fear as he points to one of the doors across from me.

"you see those doors, buddy?" i nod my head. "you know what's behind those doors?" i shake my head. the third door to the right opens and a man exits, looking absolutely blown away. a girl in a tight white bikini exists after him, looking distracted. fuck.

"dabi, nonononono, i do NOT want a private dance, nonono please" i tug at his jacket and he shakes me off.

"too bad, buddy. you're gettin' one." i whimper out in fear and clench my jaw. "come on, dumbass. youre 21 now. and youre still a virgin. it's kinda sad. at least get the experience of a lap dance, my god."

"dabi, i do not want a lap dance, i want to go-"

"shigaraki, a virgin at 21 is like a puppy who's never had a biscuit before. now go. second door. have fun!" he laughs evilly again and saunters off to the bar again, leaving me to my own devices.

i could run right now, or...

or i could man up and go get a fucking lap dance.

in private.

with a girl.

fuck it, i say to myself and go up to the second door. i take a deep breath and turn the knob, entering slowly. its empty.

what the fuck?

i take a seat on the giant plush....couch? futon? bed thing? i'm not quite sure, but it wraps around the room in a U-shape. the walls are made of all mirrors, with a sound system laid into the wall, and speakers next to the ceiling. i sit in the middle of the leather seats and scratch my neck anxiously. either dabi set me up real good, or...

a knock at the door startles me out of my thought and i look up. the door swings open and swiftly shuts. i recognize the body...the face...calypso walks in and raises her brows at me. every bit of my drunkenness dissipates at the sight.

"you're the birthday boy, huh? that's convenient. can i get my top back?" she says, her voice low and drawn out. she stares down at me and my eyes feel like they're going to fall out of my head. she's wearing something different now: a tight red top with a thong, pulled up around her hips, accentuating her curves. her boots are frighteningly large, thick leather straps and buckles crossing over her calves and thighs.

i fumble over my words as i pull the top out of my pocket, "i, how did you kn- i'm sorry" i wince at my own voice, and she laughs.

"giant mirror. the look on your face. i'm not dumb" she leans in and whispers the last lines into my ear, sending a shiver down my spine.

"oh...okay" i choke out. "sorry" i repeat, and she stands.

"good boy" she nods, and presses a button on the stereo. "porn star dancing" begins to play. i bite my lip and look up at her nervously. she traces my jaw with her nail, just like she did earlier, and climbs into my lap.

"do you want a lap dance, pretty boy?" her voice is sweet and sultry in my ears. i grip her thighs instinctively as she grinds into me slightly and i nod furiously. any intention i had of resisting is gone, as i glance at her ass in the mirror across from us. her thighs are warm and plush, and as she stands back up, i have to stifle my whimper. she turns around and bends over, giving me the perfect view of her ass. i reach out to grab it, and she turns around.

"ah ah, no touching yet, pretty boy." i exhale hard at the way the nickname rolls off her tongue. she continues to bend and sway in front of me, and my desperation grows. my saliva builds rapidly at the sight of her supple body teasing me, and i swallow hard again.

she brings herself back to face me, pushing her soft tits against me. they smell the same as her top, soft and spicy and sweet. i moan and plant a kiss to the flesh and she lets out a soft "hmm". i take this as an okay to touch her, and i bring my hand down hard on her ass, gripping it tightly. she gasps and flashes her wild eyes at me. she sits fully in my lap, grinding her ass against me, bouncing and bending on me.

i cant help but harden back up, my cock beating against it's jean prison again. my breath quickens as she slides off, and suddenly drags a hand to my upper thigh, squeezing it hard. i gasp at the touch and she laughs, a sickeningly seductive smile painting her beautiful face. my eyes roll back as she palms the front of my jeans.

wait.

i look to her now as she licks her lips and bites her lip. she drops down to her knees, her eyes glassy and half-shut as she stares up at me. i look at her in the mirror again, seeing her boots pressing against her plump ass again. i groan and push my hair back, and she fiddles with the front of my pants.

"your friend out there said you were a virgin, is that right?" she draws out, wicked and teasing. i nod and my cheeks flush with embarrassment. "you want me to fix that?" she questions nonchalantly as she pops the button of my jeans.

"wait, what?" i stumble, and she chuckles softly.

"i don't do this for everyone, you know." she points a cruel finger at me, "but when i saw how desperate you got out there, i honestly wondered if i could break you. thank god your friend asked me for the dance, otherwise i'd have to come find you myself" she laughs lowly, and i shiver.

i cant find the words, so i just nod furiously. she smiles up at me and unzips the front of my jeans. i help her by pushing down my boxers, letting my cock spring free. she gives a soft surprised look, and i furrow my brows.

"you're much bigger than i expected" she whispers, and wraps a hand lazily around my shaft. if i wasn't so turned on right now, i might take that offensively. but as she wraps her pouty lips around the tip, i throw my head back, ignoring any cues that this might not be a part of the lap dance.

her tongue swirls luridly around my tip, causing me to gasp. i'm already overstimulated, my cock twitching and jumping at her touch. she takes me deeper down her throat until her nose buries into my skin, and she lets out a low hum against the throbbing appendage. as i moan, she wraps her hand back around, sliding it alongside where she sucks me off, the doubled sensation causing my hips to buck up. she giggles around my dick as she sucks it, and i tangle my pale fingers into her hair. its so soft, just like the rest of her. she moans softly at the sensation of me pulling it, and i whimper. she pulls off of me with a gentle "pop" and i groan.

"you sound so fucking pathetic, pretty boy" she whispers.

"t-tomura. call me tomura" i choke out in rushed breath, and she nods.

"tomura. pretty name for a pretty boy" she nods, and i cant help but moan again at how she says my name. she brings my cock back into her mouth and drags her tongue all the way up, wrapping her soft fingers around my balls and squeezing gently. my body feels like its on fire and i start to feel myself breaking.

"ah-ah, ha, fuck" my breaths tangle with the mantra of swears and incoherent noises spilling from my mouth. i make no effort to stifle myself, there's no point. i grip her hair harder and she presses her teeth ever so slightly into the flesh of my cock, and i tremble. the sensations are driving me wild, and i completely lose control. i watch as her mouth slides up and down, her spit dripping down my length, tangling with the mess of precum already spilling from me.

"hnng, fuck, agh, ah ah, ah, i'm gonna" i whimper out, and she only looks up at me, not stopping. her grip on my balls tightens as i twitch inside her warm mouth, and the sight sends me over the edge.

"god, FUCK, fuck, ah, fuck, i'm cumming, oh fuck, i'm cumming" i pant out, and shove her head all the way down as my cock sputters. she chokes slightly around me as i feel the thick ribbons shoot down her tight throat. i whimper and moan out unapologetically, and she keeps sucking even after i finish, sending volts of electricity through my entire body. she pulls off of me sloppily, a string of drool and cum dripping from her lips. i twitch as the aftershock rumbles through me, feeling the alcohol (and blood) rush back to my head. my breathing staggered. she wipes her mouth with the bottom of my hoodie, and stands.

"you did such a good job, tomura" her voice is slightly raspy as she praises me, and strokes my face. i smile weakly up at her.

"th-thank you, calypso" i breathe out, and she returns the soft smile.

"happy birthday, pretty boy" she turns the music down and heads for the door.

"wait" i bleat out, and she turns, "can we...can i see you again?" she laughs with an exhale, and grins.

"come back next weekend." she replies, and my heart seizes. i nod and look at the floor.

"can i have your number?" i ask quietly.

she chuckles and shakes her head no.

"do you want...the top back?" i hand it to her, and she shakes her head.

"consider it your birthday present." and she walks out the door before i can respond. i shove the top back in my pocket and fix my clothes, checking myself in the mirror before exiting a couple minutes after her.

as always, dabi is standing across from the door, unlit cigarette hanging from his lip. "how'd it go, buddy?" he chortles, and i look up at him.

"we're coming back next weekend" i say, and without another word, i head out the front doors. the bouncer nods at us as we exit, and dabi follows behind with a "fuck yes!".

when we return home, i fling myself into my bed and yank the top out of my pocket. i examine every speck of glitter, the tag, everything. i slip the padding out of it, just for shits, and notice in thin black ink:

"your lucky day.

XXX-XXX-XXXX."

⭑*•̩̩͙⊱••••✩••••̩̩͙⊰•*⭑

hope u enjoyed! i finished this at 3:50am and poured my whole ass heart into it. i had a lot of fun writing this :D

lmk if i should write more from shigs pov, or if a reader pov would be better, i tried to be experimental ;-;

thank u for the request as always!!

xoxo

[chaesparklez]

금빛 노을 아래 한 고백 | gunwook x reader

wc: 1.5k

reader: gender neutral

content: flashfic, fluff, some teasing, romance, school setting, kissing, fluttery feelings <3

a/n: this is my first time writing for gunwook! the title translates to ‘a confession under a golden sunset’. as my bias wrecker he has such a special place in my heart and i hope my writing captured him as beautifully as he is. also added the bibi song since i had it on repeat writing this and feel like it encapsulates the vibe of this scenario so well. enjoy!

warm sunlight streams through the blinds spilling onto the desks of the empty classroom, silent aside from the distant sounds of a few students shuffling through the corridors going home after their extracurriculars.

the classroom is bathed in a golden glow from the the waning sun. you stretch your hand out before you, waving your fingers and tilting your head to the side as you watch the silhouette of your hand dancing on the wall before you. you bring your hand closer to your eyes so the dark shadow draws nearer and nearer till it obliviates the wall in a mass of black...

"hey! what are you doing?"

you jump so hard you nearly scream. gunwook leans against the doorway with a cheshire cat grin plastered on his face.

"what the hell gunwook?? god, you startled me. my heart's beating so fast." you scowl.

"isn't that just because you like me?"

"what the fuck."

you and gunwook had a contentious relationship. in simple terms, he always annoyed the hell out of you. you don't even know when he popped into your life, but all of a sudden he was always around you, teasing you and pulling pranks acting like you'd known eachother for years. you weren't sure whether you found it funny or just annoying.

'where even were you? teacher kim put us both on cleaning duty today.'

"why are you so interested in me?" he replies, wiggling his eyebrows in mocking.

you roll your eyes. "whatever. i'm halfway done anyway," you sigh. taking the chalkboard eraser and beginning to wipe logarithms from the board with long swipes.

he clears his throat.

"hey... im sorry. i actually wanted to help this time." he says, scratching the back of his head and giving you a bashful look.

you snicker. "what the hell? why are you being nice to me? are you going to shove a fake cockroach down my shirt again?"

he'd already tried that one three times this week, the last time culminating in you chasing him down the hallway screaming and being caught by teacher kim- hence you both ending up on cleaning duty.

he begins to move closer.

"do not come closer, park gunwook. i swear to god, one more fake cockroach and you'll be on the floor crying."

"no, i-"

the classroom is suddenly filled with an eruption of screams and laughter. gunwook hadn't listened to you (as usual) continuing to grow nearer- so you'd clapped the erasers in his face creating a poof of chalkboard dust in the air.

"what was that for?" he coughs, tempting to wave away the billow of dust.

"it's what you get!" you jeer, happy to have caught him off guard for once.

you place the erasers back and begin to sweep. gunwook follows you with all the manner of a lost puppy, just awkwardly trailing next to you as you make your away around the room.

"gunwook, i literally can't see with your big head in the way."

"what do you mean big??"

"your shadow is so massive it's covering the floor and i can't see."

"don't make things up."

"i'm not! look at your shadow! you’re practically blocking the sun like a titan.”

"well.. don't you like tall guys?"

you pause at the sudden but earnest question. a pale pink blush was seeping across his cheeks, his eyes fixed on some other spot in the room. what was wrong with him today?

you sigh, too tired to ponder on it, and continue sweeping.

"what are you even saying.." you mumble in reply. 'just get out of my way.'

"okay, fine. is there at least a task for me to do?"

"go sharpen the pencils. at least make yourself useful if you're gonna bother me."

~~

"sung hanbin." he says from the other side of the room.

"what?" you swivel your head to where gunwook stands sharpening the pencils. his eyes hadn't left the floor, continuing his task calmly.

he stays silent so you draw nearer to him, puzzled. "what do you mean?" you ask again.

"you mentioned it to haneul the other day," he says quietly. 'that you like sung hanbin. that he's so kind, and dances so well, and he's so tall..."

you squint your eyes at him. did he listen to your conversations?

‘i'm tall too. my mom said by the time i turn 21 i'll be 190cm.’ he says, knuckles white as his hand grips the pencil sharpener. he pauses. ‘and im taller than sung hanbin.’

"what are you even saying?" you laugh. you place the broom aside and perch yourself on a desk. 'why are you suddenly mentioning him?'

"what's your ideal type?" he asks suddenly, voice cracking a little at the end of the sentence.

you snort and nearly blurt out a tart reply before noticing he's not teasing you. his blush had spread across his cheeks as he stared down at his hands bashfully. you blink, confused at this awkward vibe he's been channelling since earlier. you clear your throat attempting to think of an answer.

"well.. i mean, i don't have a fixed type. i guess it depends on the person. and i don't *like* sung hanbin," you say, attempting not to make a sarcastic remark. 'i just think he's handsome. like literally everyone else at school.'

"so you do like him?"

"oh my god, gunwook, i just said no. why does it even matter anyway? do *you* like me?" you say, exasperated.

his pupils waver as he stops sharpening the pencil for a second. he swallows.

"and what if i did?"

"i'd throw myself off the roof,” unable to hold in the sarcastic reply this time. what was he even getting at?

he places the tools down, his eyes finally breaking away from the pencil and gazing at yours.

"am i really that bad to you?" he asks, pupils wavering in his big brown eyes.

you're so caught off guard by his docility that you just blurt whatever comes to mind.

"i-i mean, i didn't mean it that way. you make me laugh, and you're smart, and you are tall like you said.. but you're always teasing me so i never thought of you that way.."

gunwook begins to take slow steps towards you, visage illuminated by the sunset.

"do you know why i always tease you?"

you blink, heart racing.

"because i want your attention. i want you to notice me, to look at me. i like your laugh, and your expression when i annoy you, and everything about you makes me want to carry on making you notice me. you’re always on my mind."

somewhere through his monologue your heart had started beating so hard you could almost see the pulsations through your white shirt. your pupils waver as you look at him.

"do you understand what im saying?" he asks.

"gunwook, i..." you say, voice coming out in a whisper.

"i like you."

your heart almost stops beating. now standing before you as you perched on the desk so you had to crane your neck up slightly to meet his shining eyes. he swallows as he gazes into your eyes, expression soft.

and in the golden glow of sunlight, you notice for the first time that he is beautiful. the sun illuminates his eyes the shade of honey, his jet black hair moving gently over his dark brows from the balmy wind breezing through the classrooms. and he really was so tall. tall, with wide shoulders and big hands that would give the warmest safest hugs…

he gently places a large hand on the small of your back, the distance between you even smaller now. the sound of a nearby wind-chime rings softly from the window as you look up into his eyes, your gaze travelling down to his lips.

and he kisses you. gently, sweetly, the rashness that you knew him for distant. his touch is delicate, the temperature of his warm hand on your back relaxing you into his embrace. his full lips are soft and warm against yours. he cups your face with his other hand, thumb brushing over your cheek. you lock your hands around his neck, melting into his touch.

his lips part and move in time with your own, allowing you to deepen the kiss. in that moment, your heart feels full and warm in his gentle embrace. both your hearts beat wildly as you slowly retract, hearing the quiet sound of each other's rugged breaths. your lips tingle with the lingering sensation of his lips on yours, your eyes remaining on his as you stare at his face inches from you.

his skin golden from the sunlight, rosy cheeks glowing, you suddenly feel the urge to touch his soft skin. you brush a finger along his smooth cheek, feeling the heat of his skin from the blush. he smiles as he looks into your eyes, and you notice something for the first time: a faint dimple on his right cheek. the very smile that you had always found so annoying, you had suddenly become fond of at the sight of it.

“i never noticed you had a dimple there before,” you whisper, caressing his cheek.

“look at me more from now on. i’ll smile lots for you,” he replies, taking your hand and leaving a gentle kiss on your knuckle.

the sound of the wind-chime harmonises with the laughter you share, dust particles floating and shimmering in the air under the golden sunset.

[engie-ivy]

(Inspired by @wolfstarmicrofic 's Alternative Universes theme! A sort of combined Performer AU and College AU🙂)

1058 words

Sirius Black's emotional break-up songs are topping the charts all over the world. But hearing those songs everywhere he goes, Remus is about to reach his breaking point.

With His Song

Home is where the heart is,

But it's not the concrete, nor the stone,

Not the room you sit in,

But the smile that lights it up.

Not the bed you sleep in,

But the heartbeat besides your own.

Home is where the heart is,

But it's not necessarily a place,

Sometimes, it's tracing the scars on someone's hand,

Sometimes, it's counting the freckles on someone's face.

It's been so long,

Coming home to you,

And did you know,

I could easily move on?

But the truth is,

I just don't want to.

If home is where the heart is,

Then baby, could it be,

That your home is still with me?

Mary lets out a sigh that seems to be coming from somewhere deep inside of her. “My god, I'm going to listen to that song on repeat for the rest of the week,” and after a moment she adds “potentially the rest of my life.”

“Then you're gonna have to get some headphones,” Remus says. “Because I'm already getting sick of hearing it.”

Mary gasps and clutches her chest. “Blasphemy!”

Remus gives her an unimpressed look. “I don't think you're using that word right.”

“‘Irreverence toward something considered sacred or inviolable’,” Mary states unfazed. “So yes, the perfect description of you insulting Sirius Black's music.”

Emmeline nods emphatically.

Remus sighs. “I'm not saying it's a bad song,” he says. “Just that I'm getting tired of hearing it everywhere, all the time.”

Mary opens her mouth to retort, but Emmeline interjects.

“I do sort of relate. It has gotten a painful tinge to hear the song, now that I know I won't be seeing Sirius Black perform it live…”

“You didn't get tickets for his show?” Marlene asks.

“No,” Emmeline sighs miserably. “I'm on the waiting list. Number 329.”

“Not as bad as Hestia. She's number 1550 or something.”

Emmeline shrugs. “In the end, it makes no difference. 329 or 1550, neither one of us is going to the concert. I mean, 329 people will have to die, and I don't reckon I'd be that lucky…”

“Emmeline!” Lily scolds.

“Well, that's the only excuse for not going to a Sirius Black concert, literally being dead,” Mary says. “I'd actually skip my mum’s funeral if I could see him live.”

“Mary!”

“No, no, Lils,” Emmeline says. “You don't know Mary's mum. If Mary were to miss out on seeing Sirius Black for her funeral, she'd actually come back from the death to haunt her.”

Mary nods. “She's a huge fan. Not going to a Sirius Black concert would be disrespecting her memory.” She glances over at Remus. “She might have some things to say as well if she hears that my actual roommate has openly disrespected Sirius Black’s music.”

Remus sticks out his tongue. “Sue me.”

“As soon as they create a law that makes depreciating Sirius Black illegal, which they should, I will!”

“Anyhow,” Emmeline says. “I haven't heard Sirius Black's voice for almost five minutes and I'm getting withdrawal symptoms,” and she reaches out to put the record back on.

Remus gets up to his feet. “That's my cue to leave.”

“You don't have to, Remus,” Lily says quickly. “If you really don't want us to, we won't put on his music. We value your company more than listening to Sirius Black.”

“Says who? Ow!” Emmeline rubs her shin where Lily kicked her.

Remus smiles at Lily. “Thanks, Lils, but it's okay. I have a paper I need to work on anyway.”

The moment Remus closes the door to his bedroom, he lets out a sigh that seems to be coming from somewhere deep inside of him.

Then, almost without thinking, he takes out his phone and punches in the number by heart.

“Hello?” The voice on the other end of the line sounds surprised and, dare Remus think, hopeful?

“You have to stop doing this,” Remus hears himself say. “No,” he then corrects himself. “You don't have to do anything. I'm asking you. Please stop doing this.”

“Remus, what are you talking about?” He seems to be walking away from something– A promo event? A fancy dinner? An exclusive party?– as Remus can hear the voices in the background grow softer. Remus feels a brief hint of satisfaction; no matter how big the event he's at, how important the people he's with, when Remus calls, he gets up and walks away to talk to him, but Remus quickly corrects himself, because it's not like that anymore.

“It's killing me,” Remus admits, pressing a hand against his forehead. “I understand, but… God, it's killing me.”

“Rem,” Sirius, because of course it's Sirius, says gently. “You're still not making much sense. What are you trying to say? Why are you suddenly calling me? Why… Why now?”

“Your latest releases,” Remus says, as he starts pacing the room, though he can barely take two steps before he reaches the opposite wall. It's rather telling of the difference between them, he can't help but think. Sirius undoubtedly in some grand building surrounded by dozens of people who would fall over themselves to cater to his every whim, and Remus hiding out in his eight square meter bedroom cluttered with textbooks and scribbled notes. “I get why you do it. I'm probably terribly biased,” he lets out a brief laugh. “But I think the songs you wrote when we were together, and even after we just broke up, are your best songs, so I get that you would want to release them, to share them with the world and show everyone once again just how bloody talented you are. And you have every right. They're your works, your creations. But gods, Sirius, I can't pretend anymore.”

“Pretend,” Sirius repeats, his voice almost a whisper, and Remus lets it all out.

“I can't pretend anymore that hearing those songs everywhere I go all the damn time doesn't make me want to die! That it doesn't just break me, to hear your voice sing those words, knowing what they once meant, and knowing that they don't mean that anymore! That you don't mean that anymore.”

“Remus,” Sirius interrupts sharply, and Remus immediately stops talking as Sirius speaks. “Do you really think I could sing those words like that, if I didn't still feel that way?”

And Remus’ breath catches in his throat.

[sass-ruby]

Okay so um, I'm gonna be talking about these two episodes today! (Prepare BECAUSE OH MY GOSH.)

Alright, we'll start with the first one. Can I just say that, moon absolutely angered me so much. Moon, NO ONE IS ASKING YOU FOR AN EMOTIONAL SPEECH NOR ANYTHING. It's the fact that you COMPLETELY ignored sun, didn't even bother to check up on him, and then went to work in your lab to find a solution?? Looks like history is repeating itself. But.. why? Why is the same thing repeating again? WELL I HAVE A THEORY! Sun's gonna die, someway, somehow and that's gonna be the only way moon realizes. I think this because of solar specifically. When solar heard that moon won't check up on sun, he sounded absolutely disgusted. Keep in mind, solar lived in HIS SUN'S head. That sun ALSO had a moon, and I bet solar has watched the same exact thing happen. And what happened when solar's sun died? Solar's moon went insane! Imagine the guilt moon would feel, gut wrenching. He probably ALREADY feels guilty, but would rather let it consume him whole than to comfort sun or AT THE VERY LEAST HUG HIM

Sun was there with moon during moon's (valid) breakdown, but moon being there for sun? NOOO, OF COURSE NOT!

Also if moon's gonna start with the "I'm not good with emotions" stuff, I'll lose it. YOU HAVE PROVEN IN OTHER VIDEOS THAT YOU CAN, MOON. Neptor's funeral, OR HELL WHEN THE WHOLE FINDING OUT DAZZLE'S SECRET THING HAPPENED. He listened about every kid, comforted, reassured, he was there. Although, now he's just ignoring sun. I think it's because he's a coward. And by a coward, I mean that he's too scared he'll say something wrong or make it worse, because the word is about NEXUS, someone who moon HATES, though sun loves nexus, evil or not, he was still his brother.

Moon doesn't understand that, he's jealous most likely. It reminds me so much of when nexus wasn't insane.. he was bad talking moon, and when moon returned? Moon was bad talking nexus. Both didn't want to be like each other, they DESPISE each other, calling each other knock off's (okay, THAT PART WAS KINDA FUNNY I'M SORRY.)

But.. where is sun in all of this? He missed each one. He loved each one. He loved them. He still loves them.

But they BOTH didn't understand how their words hurt sun. They're so similar in some ways, it's absurd. AND THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE IT. Reminds me of the song "over and over" by Rio Romeo.

If sun dying is the only way for moon to realize, I'll be willing to accept it even if it is quite sad. It's disappointing, truly.

Monty's and lunar's reaction, I expected honestly. By the way, lunar-, "he's doing worse than I thought he would be.." ARE YOU STUPID, HE JUST KILLED HIS EX BROTHER?? Didn't you go through the same damn thing too? As for monty, not even surprised one bit. He's always been like that, I never really liked him, but oh well.

And THANK YOU SOLAR FOR BEING THE ONLY SANE PERSON EXCEPT MAYBE EARTH BECAUSE GOSH THIS SHOW AIN'T FOCUSING ON SUN'S HEALTH MUCH.

The urge to b*tch slap almost everyone.

I genuinely want sun to have a breakdown, he chose moon, but moon didn't bother to even check up on him.

Gosh.

------------------------------

ANYWAYS, TODAY'S EPISODE!

Just gonna add this picture again, because why not

Wow- genuinely just wow- that was-.. wow

So dark sun DID end up doing something. I must've missed something in the past video, but interesting..

I heard a person say, I forgot who it was but that SUN was the key of this whole plan

He killed nexus, he pulled the trigger and made a choice which means.. that way other suns also made choices instead of not acting

I have NO idea how sun managed to make that happen, BUT THE THEORY MAKES SENSE

In a way, I was right- he IS trying to stop the dimensional abuse of suns by them killing their own moon, I SUCK AT EXPLAINING

if anyone can explain this theory better than me, PLEASE DO.

I felt so bad for the sun in this dimension. Poor thing. Sounded scared and terrified, while repeating "I hate you", while crying and also while bashing HIS moon's head with a barrel

I wanted to hug him QwQ poor baby.. we need a name for him

ALSO HE'S MY CHILD NOW. I'M ADOPTING HIM.

Moon tried his best to keep that sun at peace, WHICH BRINGS ME BACK TO THE SAME TOPIC, WHY DOES HE HELP EVERYONE EXCEPT HIS SUN

I get it was a different situation BUT CMON.

I suppose I already ranted enough about that part, though

I would add more but I'm INCREDIBLY tired and all.. so um yeah-

[honey-milk-depresso]

Batboys x reader who is a game/singer streamer

So I'm assuming that s/o is a singer + game streamer from what I can see soooo yeah! I think I went to focus on the gamer part than singer though. Also I could only do this for Dick, Jason and Tim because 😭 sorry ;-;;;

TT o TT

Batboys with a game (mostly) + singer s/o

Dick Grayson

Don’t even get me started on how hype Dick’s gonna be. You game??? And stream?????? Epic-

Dick has played video games with Tim before it’s just that he sucks at playing the modern one sometimes-, so he probably wants to do co-ops with you and maybe join your streams and play with you.

He sucks ASS though in Among Us because he’s bad at lying when he’s imposter and too trusting when he’s just a crew mate. He’s so funny though when you record him while playing with you and your other streamer friends.

“Awww, look at me and s/o walking together and building snowmen! We are so—”

*Kills him* “…” “s/O WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME ARE YOU TRYING TO BREAK UP WITH MEEEEEEE????”*loud sobbing*

Obviously, no, it’s just what you had to do as an imposter and you have to apologise to your sulky boyfriend.

Fun fact: bought your two of those matching cat ears headphones and he’s so sappy, dear god- he loves those earphones.

Also your voice?? IT’S SO GOOD??? You made your own songs and that’s so cool!! No wonder your fanbase is so big, damn-

And he’s obviously your biggest fan! <

Jason Todd

He’s trying, he really is. Because the last thing he played before he died were Game Boys and then he awoken to Wii Games, Nintendo Switches and whatever the fuck those online games are.

Those sus game ads he clicked randomly made him question what happened when he was still dead-

Jason thinks it’s pretty cool you stream gaming content and all, although don’t ask him to play any RPG with you because he’ll rage quit. He will go insane.

Jason keeps insisting on wanting to join your streams in Among Us but like come on- WE ALL KNOW HE’S GONNA START RAGING MORE-

When he gets killed, he calls the imposter a “Joker” 💀 Sometimes you have to calm him down and tell him it’s their role as imposter to do this. Also, when he gets imposter, he’ll kill everyone except you. Like he’s your bodyguard or something and everyone’s out to get you. You don’t even need to be imposter. If you did kill him before, he’ll kill you back though-

He’s okay if you let him play Minecraft together though, he finds it peaceful (on creative mode).

Listens to your songs on repeat while he’s repairing vehicles or hear it live on your stream when he’s reading. Wholesome supportive boyfriend stuff. <3

Tim Drake

Immediately follows all forms of social media you have, and give subs to every time you go live and stream. No hesitation.

He thinks it’s cool you stream games and all, something he wished to do but just doesn’t have much time to do so, and that he has no idea how to start up a fanbase anyways so-

Tim would join your streams every once in a while to play with you and he doesn’t mind any sort of games, he’s pretty good with the controller… well, maybe RPG. Because if he’s doing a multiplayer game like with Genshin needing to join servers and all, most of the time, people wouldn’t listen to his plans and end up dying and then he goes berserk. Only you listen s/o… wHY?? WHY DOES NOBODY LISTEN TO HIS STRATS????

Also, cat ears headphones?? He has one and he looks so cute in it and would ask if you want one too- he only wears those headphones in private though, or in front of you.

Anyways, Tim loves your singing too! Would listen it live or hear it on Spotify if it’s available. If you sing covers, it’s gonna ruin him. He can’t listen to the original track anymore because it’s just not the same-

Overall, gamer boyfriend you got here. <3

[rosinaparker]

hii I've read your blogs and they are literally perfect, but I have a request could you do a han x f!reader smut ? Feel free to say no, thank you <3★

THANK YOU 😭 this will be my first time writing smut please bare with me😞

Rainy day huh?

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff, smut, friends to lovers

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: best friend!Han Jisung x f!reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, fingering, messy making out

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: there's a thunderstorm outside and you don't have an umbrella. luckily your best friends apartment complex was near and you decide to go dry off at his place..but things escalate after the tension between you two finally snaps.

It was poring outside, my clothes drenched as i ran around for shelter. A small shop was still open at this hour, currently 10pm. I open my phone, looking at my location seems like I'm near Hannies place, i should go and dry off at his! I thought.

i went off to find his apartment. its been a while since i've seen him, he has been really busy with work and producing new songs for the album. though i must admit, it's been hard hanging out with him. why? because i might've catched feelings for that dork.

i enter the building, quickly running up the stairs. i fix my hair before ringing the doorbell. the door opens slightly, revealing a messy haired jisung, His facial expression immediately changing as he saw me "hey, its pouring outside. mind if i come in?" i shot him a smile. "of course! how did you even end up around here?" he chuckled letting me in and taking my wet jacket off. "i was on a meeting with my boss, nothing special" he listened with a smile plastered on his face "need some new clothes?" I nod shyly to which he laughs "no need to be shy baby, it's not your first time changing into my clothes" he winked. why did he make it sound so dirty?! "dont make it sound like that. i only changed into your clothes once because of that one sleepover" i scoff, following him into his bedroom. "yeah, whatever you say. here have these" he threw me some sweatpants and a black hoodie. He quickly left the room, letting me change in peace.

After changing i went to the kitchen, where Jisung was waiting. "thanks for the spare clothes hannie", he shot me a sweet smile, turning back to what he was doing. curiously i sneaked up behind him "cooking?" i asked, making him jump a little "yeah, or at least trying to. the rain and coldness probably got you hungry" he stirred the ramen up. "how sweet of you" i pat his shoulder. he made us each a cup of ramen, leaning onto the counter together. "so, how have you been?" he asks slurping his noodles. "oh uhm, i've been okay" I avoid his eyes. He sighed suddenly "okay i'm gonna stop acting oblivious. why have you been avoiding me?" he got straight to the point huh? "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to come off like that. i didn't want to disturb you since this past month was pretty rough for you and the guys" I quietly explain putting the ramen on the counter and turning myself to him "You really got me worried. i thought you didn't want to spent time anymore" he chuckled, repeating my moves, leaving the noodles and turning to me. "i missed you", he whispers, looking me deep in the eyes. god, my stomach was twisting "i missed you too.." i stutter out making him chuckle "oh yeah? the way I missed you or the way friends would miss each other?" he came closer. What? was he confessing? what is happening?! "i, uh what?-" I mumble out, taken aback "sorry, was i too straightforward?", he sighs "i just..realized it's hard without you around" He spoke softly, melting my heart. "forget it. i dont know what i'm saying-" i pulled him in for a hug "no, no. I like you too. just a bit unexpected" i stare into his eyes. "please tell me i can kiss you.." he huffed putting his hands on my waist, i only giggled pulling him in for a kiss. the kiss was soft yet passionate, i guess we were both longing for this. It went back and worth, the oxygen leaving both our lungs. Jisung signaled for me to jump onto the counter, which i gladly did. our tongues fighting for dominance but there was no use for that, he was sliding his hand under my shirt, caressing my spine absolutely dominating me. i sighed into the kiss. His other hand stroked my thigh. we parted "do tell if i go to far baby" he went back in, pulling me closer to his growing crotch. he untucked the strings on the sweatpants slowly taking them off my legs which i allow. he looked down, noticing that i didn't have panties on "oh? Naughty aren't we?" my cheeks flush as he said that "they were wet from the rain.." I look away embarrassed. he slowly stroke a line, making me whine. i tug on his shirt, pulling him into a kiss. he gently rubbed my clit taking in any sounds i made. As we were messily making out, he pushed a finger in. i immediatly moaned into the kiss, pulling away and covering my mouth. he pushed my hand away from my mouth, placing it on his shoulder "let me hear you" he carefully put another one in. i bit my lip, tears forming in my eyes "hurts?" i shake my head looking up at him. he shot me a smirk going in to place kisses on my neck. he sped up, the lewd sound turning us both even more on. i started shaking, about to finish "hannie, please a little more" I plead into his ear. He gladly kept the speed up making me release onto his fingers with a last loud moan. he kissed me as i was coming down my high. "we should do that more often, huh?" he narrowed his eyes at me. unfortunately his phone started ringing. he gently pulled out of me, whining at the loss of contact. he picked up "yeah? okay be there in 10." he kissed me once more on the lips ending the call. "gotta go to the studio. Chan needs me." he caressed my hair "you should stay over tonight though..its still raining" he grinned, i only rolled my eyes "i'm gonna take a shower, don't take too long with chan"

-Rose✩ (Holy fuck what just happened)

[thecoolerliauditore]

long post: the neck kisses playlist on joel's spotify is about jimmy (and kind of etho too a little bit)

it's not actually about jimmy it very much is not about jimmy. however I had visions when I listened to it and I know at least one person really wants me to put this into words so

"I Miss Having Sex But At Least I Don't Wanna Die Anymore" is a pretty straightforward song about Awsten Knight's post-break-up life as well as his frustrations with his fanbase.

The feelings post-break-up are described as freeing, hence the title ".. don't wanna die anymore" but the ending of the song hints at some nagging regret despite that, with the desperate repeating mantra of "but I think it's fine, it's cool"

While I don't think all of these songs signify chronology (and some I don't think are literal at all unless c!Joel has some weird daddy issue lore I'm unaware of), I do like to think the start of the playlist calls to pre-3L jimmy/joel, most specifically their relationship in x-life.

In x-life, Joel establishes a totally-not-cult religion he dubs "Jeremyism", Jimmy being his first member after he fails to trick Lizzie into joining. He later gives up his leader title, quote, "for content". Jimmy is unhappy with this development and begs Joel to stay, but Joel refuses. While their relationship in x-life would be hard to define as romantic in any sense, they were clearly fond of eachother before Joel eventually broke away.

Things get a bit hazy here since "for content" doesn't really translate to anything in-universe, but I think it's interesting to note that both the song and Joel mention an audience, specifically one that they feel the need to appease. Whether this is a metaphor or watcher lore or some secret third thing I have no idea but it sure is there 👍

In my mind, it goes like this: Jimmy and Joel meet, they hit it off, Jimmy is affectionate and Joel starts to catch feelings. Joel cuts Jimmy off for making him feel weird.

the second song in the playlist reinforces this, being a much angrier post-break-up song.

While this seems out-of-order (why does the immediate anger come after the song about life after the break-up?), I think it's interesting if you look at it from an angle of this not being fully Joel's feelings towards Jimmy, but Joel's frustration towards himself for messing it up.

with a little bit of frustration being placed on jimmy too:

pictured: joel in third life with a message from jimmy that he very much. does not answer.

personally I like to think Joel held a lot of resentment towards Jimmy in Third Life, both for homophobic reasons (i.e. you made me feel gay and now I'm gonna punish you for it) and for jealousy reasons (start of his number one scott hater arc)

this one's just in the wrong playlist first of all why does he insert this between two waterparks songs. whatever man.

anyway this song's interesting to me because it's literally just about a hot babe getting rejected by some fuck who refuses to be ball-and-chained.

there's two directions this could go imo: one is that this is, once again, evoking joel and jimmy's relationship. Joel acknowledges that he a life with Jimmy would be nice, but he refuses to settle down because it would rob him of his identity/freedom.

the other is that brandy is joel and the sailor is etho, since brandy shows an admiration for the sailor but also an awareness that he loves his job more than her

this storybook like description of how brandy saw the sailor's tales is very smalletho to me idk. very hand-in-hand with joel's child-like view of who etho is.

I don't have much for this one tbh it's pretty much just a love song and Joel really liking waterparks (king)

That being said, there's some fun imagery to play with here:

yellow = jimmy makes a lot of sense (blonde hair, canary imagery, yellow also representing people on their second life in the life series which evokes neither the assumed skillfulness of a late game green name nor the danger of a red name), as does green = joel (the green streak. shrek. yeahg. and while red joel is iconic "green like my insides" could also be read in this context as "deep down, I am safe to be around" which I think is neat)

"natural blue" is a bit harder to interpret (especially considering the original context of this being a joke about Awsten dyeing his hair) but blue is of course scott's colour. this could be read spitefully as Natural blue (was in love with jimmy first) vs scott's dyed hair or it's. joel saying that's he's gay idk man.

"at least I match your eyes" is pretty simple, with both of them having brown eyes, "jealous and hypnotized" once again alluding to some jealousy, likely towards FH again if you believe the blue line is alluding to scott.

however joel has plenty of people to be jealous of in regard to jimmy so. shrugs. hey you can even interpret this line as talking about jimmy's desirability. neat.

there's also this, which again might allude to flower husbands, implying in this fake world I've created that Joel doesn't view them as actually "married"

ok this is getting too long lmao see you guys next time i feel like writing about this stupid fucking playlist again

[strangersteddierthings]

Bad News First, Eddie

Part One 🦇 Part Two🦇Part Three🦇FInal Part

This was getting longer than both Steve and Wayne's parts combined, so I'm gonna break it into 2 parts. Posting part 1 now, and part 2 should be up within a day. Thank you everyone for the wonderful replies/reblogs. I screenshot them cause they keep me going haha.

Trigger Warning: Child abuse referenced, as well as one scene of a child being slapped. Use of slurs in a derogatory manner.

-

Bad news first, Eddie thinks to himself as he swings the trash can lid turned shield, this is a fuckton of bats. Good news, Dustin is safe.

The bats are overwhelming but he's holding his own. He can do this. He can buy them more time. He's done running away from the things that scare him.

-

Bad news, Eddie thinks, watching Dustin sob above him, I'm gonna die here.

-

Eddie dies. He knows this because all the hurt stops. The world has faded into itself, dimming to a blackness deeper than Eddie's ever known.

The afterlife is a bit disappointing if he's honest. He's not sure what he was expecting, but it wasn't nothing. Endless, unfathomable nothing.

He kinda hoped he'd see his mom or something, but that's delusional. If the afterlife was heaven or hell, he wouldn't end up in the one his mom went to, that's for sure. Too many sins under his belt for that.

Death is pretty boring though.

-

Time is impossible to track. He's tried a few times, counting seconds to make minutes but that's so boring he loses his train of thought. Ends up humming some tune or another before repeating the process.

The day he finds himself humming a Wham! song has Eddie a little panicked. He doesn't listen to Top 40 stations. He spent a good deal of time avoiding learning any Wham! songs, actually, so now that he's somehow gotten one such in his head...

This has got to be capital H Hell.

Well. Everyone in town thought he was on the road straight to it. Laugh it up, Hawkins. You were right. The Freak went straight down.

-

Eddie misses Wayne. He can't remember the last thing he'd said to him. When did he last tell his uncle he loved him? Wayne knew it though. He had to know it. They didn't say it out loud but they didn't need to. Right?

-

In the distance, Eddie sees something. A light? He's not sure what it is but it's something new. Something different.

The light leads him back into the Upside Down. The bats are swarming and he just crashed the bike- fuck fuck fuck, run. Run, Eddie, get the fuck out of here!

He's screaming at himself to run but instead his body stops. Turns. Pulls the shield and spear from his back and screams at the bats.

Eddie rips himself back, away. Crumples to the ground, folding into himself. Not that. Anything but that again.

-

A soft humming sound. Gentle, warm.

Loving.

Eddie unfolds himself to see what it is.

His mom smiles down at him, reaches out to ruffle his hair as she hums. Eddie knows the danger has passed and he is safe now because Mamma only hums that when it's safe.

"There's my handsome boy," she moves the hand from his hair to boop the tip of his nose. "How about we play a little game, hmm? The floor is lava!"

She scoops him up and plops him on the kitchen table. There is a crunching sound beneath her feet as she moves. Lava sounds an awful lot like Dad's broken beer bottles but if Mamma wants to play pretend then Eddie can do that for her.

-

His mother is beautiful. The most beautiful woman in the world. He takes after her in a lot of ways. Matching curly locks, the same face scrunch when they're angry, their noses, big brown doe eyes. Eddie even shares her voice, just a different pitch. The point is, Eddie's mom is beautiful and he's got enough ego left at four years old to think of himself as beautiful, too.

The problem, then, is that Eddie makes the mistake of saying it in front of his Dad. 'As pretty as Mamma,' he'd said. They'd, he and Mamma that is, were sitting crosslegged on the floor in the living room. Dad had been in the kitchen, Eddie could hear him puttering about. Mamma had booped his nose and called him the best looking kid in all of America.

Eddie nodded fiercly, "yeah! As pretty at Mamma."

It used to be a fuzzy memory, what happens next. A flurry of movement and shouting. Now he's witnessing it with terrible clarity. His dad's hand curling around his upper arm and yanking him into the air, crushing hard enough to bruise. His dad's shouting at him. He remembers not remembering the words but now they hit him like the slap his dad delivered to his face. "No son of mine is going to be a fuckin' fag, thinkin' he's some pretty little girl. Is that what you want, you little shit? To be a little girl?"

"Stop it! Stop it! Let him go, he didn't mean anything like that!" he hears his Mamma plead but his Dad won't stop shaking him and screaming. He bursts into tears because it hurts and he's confused and his Dad's never hit him before- "Hit me! Hit me! If you're gonna hit someone, hit me!"

Eddie gets tossed aside. He lands on back and sees as his Dad does exactly as his Mamma demanded. Eddie's never been so scared in his life, he can't watch. He scampers down the hall as fast as he can and crawls under his bed to hide.

-

If Eddie had to guess, that's the memory that ingrained his need to run.

-

He's reliving his memories. He's a little embarrassed how long it takes him to figure that out. They say your life flashes before your eyes when you die. They don't tell you that the quote flash unquote takes a really fuckin' long time. Like, you know, your whole life long time.

It's so strange to witness, too. Like he's both watching the memories as an outsider, but also through his own eyes. He has both the knowledge that he had when he died, and also no experience beyond what he's seeing in the memory.

-

He watches his Dad beat his Mamma, beat him, but also watches his Dad push him on the swings and slow dance around the kitchen with his Mamma. And that's the worst part, he thinks. That his Dad could have been an awesome one. If he'd stayed sober like he kept promising. He didn't though, couldn't. Hell, maybe it's even a wouldn't. He watchs Wyatt fucking Munson pick beer and drugs over him and his Mamma time and time again.

Couldn't even put them down long enough to be there when Mamma got sick.

-

Eddie is seven. He's just had his head shaved, bald as his Mamma now. He regrets doing it as soon as he sees his Mamma's smile falter when Uncle Wayne drops him off at the hospital.

"We match, Mamma," Eddie says shyly, eyes downcast. "I wanted to match..."

"Oh, baby, come here," and she's scooping him into a hug, genuinly smiling again, "I love that we match. So long as it was your decision to cut your hair."

Eddie realizes now why her smile had faltered. She thought Dad had shaved his head against his will, probably because long hair was for woman, as he liked to say. Eddie in the memory didn't know that, though, so he just cuddles closer and says, "Yeah. Uncle Wayne did it for me, so it would be nice and even, he said. Wanna hear what we did in school today?"

-

There is something looming at the edges of his vision. Eddie can't seem to make whatever it is come into focus. It's not a memory because those always focus. It's something else. Something new.

-

His dad teaches him to hot wire a car. Makes him learn how to pick the lock on car doors and handcuffs. When he sees how easily Eddie took to lockpicking, he makes him learn other locks, too.

Eddie misses out on school because his dad can't be bother to enroll him and Eddie doesn't know how to do it himself. He's too scared to, anyway. Afraid his dad will start swinging and won't stop until he's dead.

-

When Eddie is eleven, a lot happens. It was a pivitol age for him. He got his first crush (a boy named Jimmy) and a first kiss (a boy named Jeramiah). Eddie also ends up in the hospital because his Dad caught him kissing Jeramiah.

It's not his Dad that picks him up from the hospital, though.

Eleven is the age he is the day his Uncle Wayne moves him to Hawkins, Indiana.

He's also eleven the first time he hears Black Sabbath.

Eddie is also eleven years old when he decides that he wants good news delivered last. To end with something good.

-

He relives becoming himself.

Catching up in school because he's not stupid, but falling behind because he is kinda dumb (schoolwork never seemed as imporant as hanging out with friends, or starting a band, or playing dungeons and dragon, or any other number of things).

The relief he feels the first time he meets another person like him, learns there's another word besides faggot for what he is. Gay. The immense pleasure of feeling truly seen the first time he says that out loud to someone (it's his best friend, Jeff) "Bad news, Jeff. You might hate me for this. Good news, I'm gay."

Good, good news. Jeff doesn't hate him!

There's a fear that Wayne might be like his Dad regarding all this, so he can't tell him; won't tell him.

But then Wayne comes home unexpectedly when Eddie is a freshman and catches him with another boy's tongue in his mouth. Eddie has a panic attack that winds up with him in the hospital.

He remembers the paralizing fear when Wayne came to pick him up upon his release. Eddie had walked to the pickup numb and afraid. He climbed in, buckled the seatbelt, and waited for the worst.

Wayne climbed in and started the pickup but didn't put it in gear. Instead, he spoke, "Life is gonna be rough for you, boy. Rougher than it should be."

Eddie cannot make words form to reply. Can't do anything but shake.

"Eddie," Wayne says and he feels the seat move as Wayne shifts to turn towards him, "the bad news is, life is gonna be rough, but the good news? Living under my roof isn't. Won't be. Eddie, my boy, I love you. And nothing, absolutely nothing, will change that."

Eddie breaks, like a puppet with its strings cut, sags in the seat and sobs. Never, never had Eddie ever bothered to entertain the idea that this might be Wayne's response.

-

Eddie is a sophomore the first time he notices Steve Harrington. It's fucking awful. It's also amazing.

Because noticing Steve Harrington means noticing Steve Harrington. He's immidiately popular because he's good looking and good at sports.

Eddie's not gonna claim to know Steve, he doesn't. There's just these little clues that King Steve isn't a default jerk. For one, Steve doesn't partake in bullying. He stays silent. Lets it happen.

But Eddie's also been witness to two times when Stever did step in; both times when it was escalating to be a phycical altercation.

"Hey, Tommy, don't," Steve had said, not quite stepping between Tommy and the other kid, but enough to be within Tommy's line of sight. "The game is tomorrow. You throw that punch and your hand is gonna hurt like a bitch through the whole game. And I swear to God if we lose this game because you can't handle it-" Steve didn't finish the sentence, didn't have to. Tommy lowered his arm and scoffed. Walked away mutter about how the kid wasn't worth it anyway.

The other time, it had been Jeff he'd defended. Jeff hadn't even been doing anything. Just stumbled into some asshole from the basketball team and knocked him over. Eddie had been the one who'd shoved Jeff (because Jeff was teasing him) and he was ready to place himself in the way when Steve had beat him to it.

"Fucking relax, it was an accident," Steve stood face to face with Roger. Eddie and Jeff just stared at the back of Steve's head. "It's not Jeff's fault that barely tapping you knocked you down like a house of cards. Right, Jeff?"

Eddie and Jeff blinked at each other in a sort of stunned silence because since when does King Steve know either of their names? Steve turned to look over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised. Jeff stammered out, "R-right. It was an accident. Sorry, man."

"See, he's even sorry."

Eddie reached out, wrapped his hand around Jeff's wrist, and tugged him away. He could not stay here and witness anymore of Hero Steve or he was going to embarrass himself infront of the entire cafeteria in the worst way possible.

-

That was the tipping point for Eddie. When he finally had to admit he wasn't just noticing Steve Harrington. He had a full blown crush on the dude.

Fuck.

-

Watching his memories play, Eddie realizes he spent far too much time in high school trying to get Steve's attention. Bumping into him on purpose, being antagonistic to his friends just get a response, or trying his best to use Jedi mind powers to make teachers pair them together for projects in the rare few classes they shared (this never worked; teachers liked Steve too much and hated Eddie).

Steve changes between junior and senior year and still doesn't notice Eddie. Eddie's kinda bitter about it.

Then Steve graduates, but doesn't leave. He's always hanging around, bothering the freshman Eddie's taken under his wing. He's not jealous that Dustin Henderson thinks Steve hung the moon. He's not. (he is).

Anyway, the bad news. Steve graduates but doesn't leave and Eddie can't get over his stupid crush. Good news, he and Steve share a mutual friend in one obnoxiously lovable freshman, so that's like one step closer to Eddie being Steve's friend, right?

-

The thing that's looming finally comes into view when his most recent memories come up. Or, more accurately, it -she- makes herself seen.

He's holding a broken bottle to Steve's neck demanding to know what he's doing here and then the scene pulls away from him until he's watching himself threaten Steve. The memory moves in slow motion.

"Eddie?"

He screams because Jesus H Christ nothing else in the afterlife has ever spoken to him.

"I am sorry. I did not mean to scare you," she says. Eddie can see her now. She doesn't look like either an angel or a demon. She just looks like a regular person, a girl with shoulder length brown hair, wearing jeans and a yellow shirt that looks too big for her.

"Uh, it's fine?" Eddie says, because what else is he going to say? "Who're.. who are- what are you?"

"I am Eleven. It has been difficult to reach you, Eddie. Had to try, though."

"What?"

Eleven nods, like someone has said something he can't hear. There is a long pause before she speaks again. "Do you want to wake up, Eddie?"

"What do you mean wake up?" Eddie feels like he might start having a panic attack.

"I am not good with words. Not delicate, Mike would say," Eleven says, "so I will be frank. You are alive. Can be alive. Doctor Owens says you retreated into yourself. To protect yourself. But it's safe now. It is all safe. The Upside Down cannot hurt you again."

Eddie feels the panic set in almost instantly at those words. The memory explodes into black and the girl vanishes.

-

The more Eleven shows up, the more aware of other things Eddie becomes. Occasionally the sound of conversation drifts in but it's far away, muffled. He can taste food on his tongue that he had not eaten. Feel a brush get stuck in his hair.

They don't really talk, he and Eleven. She takes her queues from him and since he's got no idea what's happening he doesn't know what queues to give.

"So, you're not here to like... send me on, or something?" He asks. They're sitting cross-legged in front of each other. Eddie in the outfit he died in and Eleven in shorts, a crop top, and an oversized jacket.

"Where would I send you?"

"Y'know. Like... Hell or wherever."

Eleven is silent a long time before she says, "I don't want to send you anywhere. I want to bring you back."

Back. He can go back? That doesn't seem right. That doesn't seem like it should be an option. "You mean like, back to Hawkins?"

"Eventually."

Eddie's not sure what to make of that. Is he gonna be a ghost? Because if it's Hell or being a ghost, the latter sounds infinity more fun. Plus, as a ghost he could probably check in on Wayne.

"Alright. You win, Eleven. Take me back."

Eleven stands up immediately, offering a hand to help Eddie up. "You have to want it."

"Want to be a ghost?"

"No. You have to want to be alive."

That makes sense, Eddie supposes. Wanting to be alive is probably what makes ghosts be able to like, be ghosts. "OK. OK. I can do this." He does a full body shake, dancing from one foot to another to pump himself up. "Alive. Alive. I want that. I want to live. I want to see my uncle again. Want to give Hawkins a big fuck you for thinking I'd end up in Hell. I want to see Jeff and Gareth! I want to haunt the fuck out of Dustin Henderson for trying to follow me! I want to know if Robin, Steve, and Nancy won! I want to know if they made Vecna pay!"

He is yelling by the end of it, and Eleven is beaming at him like she's proud of him.

"Yes! Yes! Now, wake up!"

-

Eddie does wake up. Sort of. He's already awake, sitting in what appears to be someone's living room. He blinks several times before exhaustion washes over him and he sags back into the chair he's sitting in. "Wh-" he tried to speak but his vocal chords don't seem to want to work.

"Holy shit." A voice says off to his side. It's vaguely familiar. Like a distant memory. "Call Owens! Call Owens right fucking now!"

-

Bad news is this. He's been stuck in his own head for several years. His fucking body has been moving around without him yet the amount of physical therapy he has to do is torture. Fucking Owens won't let him contact anyone until he gets the all clear from his new therapist. Oh, and his uncle believes he's dead.

Good news is this. He's alive.

[daysofyellowroses]

jam

richie jerimovich x afab single mom reader | 4.6k | tw: smoking, language, little bit of smut

this story basically came from me listening to norman fucking rockwell and radio by lana del rey (my robbed queen) on repeat, two songs that don't have a ton to do with this story but I was vibing to them and thinking about the fact that I actually really find richie attractive and this story just came out

—

“Alright, I'll see you later thanks so much!”

You hurried down the steps of your house, jiggling the keys in your hand til you found the key fob for the car and unlocked it. Your bag was tossed into the passenger seat, and you quickly started the car.

When you pulled up in the crowded car park, you checked the time and let out a sigh. Five minutes late. Of course. You grabbed your bag and headed straight into the building, adjusting your coat as you slipped into the auditorium. 

There was a group standing at the back, but you scanned over the seats anyway, spotting an empty one and quietly sitting down, smiling as you saw Richie sitting in the next seat looking like he was struggling not to fall asleep.

“Hey,” You whispered, resting your bag in your lap. “Did I miss anything?”

“Oh, hey,” Richie smiled a little, sitting up and gesturing to the stage. “Nah, you didn't miss anything except this jabroni talking shit about lunch menus.”

“The usual then,” You nodded, looking at the stage. “His voice just drains me. I nearly fell out of my seat when he was talking to me at the last parent's evening. At least it would have rescued me.”

Richie laughed a little, rubbing his jaw and letting out a yawn.

“I hate these things. Can't they just send a letter home with the kids saying whatever all this is?”

“I wish.” You sighed, glancing over to Richie. You were a little surprised to see him, usually it was Tiff who came to these meetings, sat beside you in boredom. Maybe she wasn't feeling well or something, it was a rare occurrence for Richie to show his face at any school event that didn't directly involve Eva.

“Before I forget,” You looked back to your bag, reaching into it. “I have something for you. Here we are.”

You pulled out a folded slip of paper, handing it over to Richie with a smile.

“What's this?” Richie raised a brow with a grin as he unfolded the paper. “To Richie, you are invited to Mia's fifth birthday party on Saturday at 1pm..”

He looked over to you, holding up the colorful invite. “This is so adorable, really. Eva is so excited for the party, she spent an hour telling me about it the other night.”

You smiled as you watched Richie look back at the invite before carefully folding it.

“Honestly I think Mia would be happy if Eva was the only person to show up,” You grinned. “she keeps asking if she'll definitely be there. And she wanted to make sure you and Tiff got invites, she doesn't really understand that parents don't need invites, but I think in her mind if she invites you both then Eva will definitely be there.”

“That's fucking precious,” Richie smiled, looking over to you. “I'll be there, I got Eva on Saturday. But I think Tiff is..away, this weekend.”

You reached out to gently touch Richie's arm, giving him a warm smile. 

“But you'll be there, thank god. I'm gonna need someone to talk to because I can't deal with the mommy cult.”

Richie nodded, letting out a chuckle before looking to the stage.

“You know, I'm pretty sure he was the principal when I went here. And he was still giving the same speech.”

You let out a laugh that was louder than you intended, covering your mouth when a couple of heads turned to look at you and the principal craned his neck forward to see the cause.

“Please hold all comments until the Q&A,” He frowned, looking over the top of his glasses. “As I was saying..”

“Q&A?” Richie muttered, slinking back in his seat. “What is this, Cannes fucking film festival?”

A long hour later, you and Richie slipped outside for a smoke as soon as the meeting ended, avoiding any run-ins with the mommy cult that always seemed so keen to recruit you. 

“That was torture,” You sighed, reaching into your bag for a light. “I hate that man, honestly.”

“Me too,” Richie nodded, pulling a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and holding it out to you. “He hates me too though, since I called him a jumped up little fucker.”

You laughed as you slid out a cigarette, placing it between your lips and flicking your lighter.

“He is though,” You murmured, handing your light to Richie and exhaling.

“He definitely hates me too. I can feel it. Sorry I can't bring anything more exciting than rice crispy squares to bake sales, I have a fucking life.”

You let out a sigh as you flicked your cigarette, glancing over to Richie and laughing.

“Sorry, I don't mean to get all..uppity. How's everything with you? I heard the Beef is getting a makeover?”

“Yeah,” Richie nodded, exhaling smoke and resting his hand on his pocket. “It's uh..it's all good, yeah. Chaotic, but that's to be expected right?”

“Right,” You smiled, pulling your coat a little tighter. “It must be exciting though, knowing you're about to start something new.”

“Mm,” Richie nodded, taking a long drag on his cigarette. “I guess I'm just not letting myself get too excited just yet. Just in case.”

“That's fair,” You agreed, taking a drag of your cigarette and glancing over your shoulder as you heard voices coming from the front door of the school. “But I think it will work out. Gut instinct, I'm never wrong.”

Richie laughed softly, smiling as he looked over to you.

“I'll have to borrow some of your faith, I got this..thing coming up that I'm-”

“Oh my gosh, there you are!”

You raised a brow as you heard a voice behind you, turning around and forcing yourself to smile as you spotted one of the ringleaders of the mommy cult. Perfectly styled hair, flawless makeup, a coat that cost more than your mortgage, and a very fake smile on her face.

“Hey Sarah,” You smiled widely, your mouth hurting a little. “How are you?”

You heard Richie scoff behind you and tried not to laugh.

“Ugh, I'm such a mess right now,” Sarah sighed, tossing her long curls over her shoulder. “I just had to throw something on to come to this, I was just so busy all day.”

“Mm,” You nodded, biting your tongue hard. If spending your husband's money and fucking your PT was a career she'd be the CEO. “Yeah, it's..it's tough.”

“I know,” Sarah smiled, touching your arm. “I meant to catch up with you at the gates this morning but you just looked so..frantic.”

Sorry we can't all turn up at the school gates in designer gym wear with a perfect ponytail and a decaf latte, you thought to yourself, forcing the smile to stay on your face.

“But I wanted to check in with you,” Sarah continued. “About Saturday. Will you be serving food? Drinks? Cake?”

“Will I be serving food, drinks and cake at my five year old daughter's birthday party?” You raised a brow, tilting your head slightly with a smile. “Yes, yes I will be doing that.”

“Okay, awesome,” Sarah smiled. “Well Tabitha isn't eating meat, dairy or preservatives at the moment, just so you're aware..but please don't let that interfere with your plans, I can always just bring something for her myself.”

“Awesome,” You smiled, your cheeks starting to ache. “Well I have to be off but I'll see you Saturday, can't wait.”

Once Sarah had walked away you let out a deep sigh before turning back to Richie and taking a long drag on your cigarette.

“Well that was..awesome,” He grinned. “free entertainment.”

“For you maybe,” You sighed, laughing as you flicked your depleted cigarette away. Richie reached for the box and you shook your head. “God I can't stand that fucking woman. You know her precious Tabitha was eating hot dogs and cake at the birthday party last weekend. Funny how she always seems to develop new eating habits when I'm the one throwing the party.”

“Hey, don't let her get to you,” Richie insisted, gently touching your shoulder. “The party is gonna be awesome, the food is going to be great, if you need anything at all just hit me up, alright?”

“Stop being so sweet, I'll cry,” You laughed softly, gently squeezing Richie's arm. “But thank you. I appreciate it.”

Richie waved his hand with a smile, shaking his head. 

“Don't mention it. I gotta get going but I will see you Saturday, right? Gonna be awesome,” He teased in a high pitched voice.

“Oh fuck off.” You grinned, walking over to your and being unable to stop the smile the whole ride home.

For the rest of the week, you found yourself excited and nervous for the party, when usually you were totally calm. The past four had been a breeze, blow up some balloons, play music, serve cake. But this one had you feeling more on edge. 

On the morning of the party, you tried to relax yourself. Your best friend had come over to help you set up, and very sweetly entertained Mia while you got everything set up. You laughed when your best friend pointed out that your house looked more like a meeting of the Taylor Swift fan club than a birthday party, but Mia was a girl who knew what she wanted. 

Once everything was ready, you ran to have a shower and get changed before the first guests arrived, taking a little extra time with your hair and makeup but not too much because there was no need for full drag for a child's birthday party.

To your surprise/relief, the party seemed to be a hit. Mia and Eva were glued together the moment Eva arrived, the two of them running off into the house giggling, leaving you alone in the hallway with Richie.

“That's her day made,” You smiled, embracing Richie in a hug. “Thanks for coming.”

“My pleasure,” Richie gently stroked your back before you moved apart, holding out a large pink gift bag. “Got somewhere I can leave this?”

“Of course, come on through,” You smiled, heading into the living room where the coffee table was already starting to get full. You told yourself you had probably given the equivalent amount of gifts over the past few months between all the other kids parties but it still felt like too much. “You can just leave it with the others.”

“I would say what it is,” Richie smiled, setting the bag down before turning back to you. “But I don't know. Some teddy bear looking thing that's got some whole backstory, apparently.”

“They all have a backstory now,” You grinned. “I can't keep up. Do you want a drink? Something to eat?”

“Sounds good,” Richie nodded, gesturing to the door. “After you.”

A couple of hours, half of Taylor Swifts's back catalogue, dozens of hot dogs, endless cupcakes, and a couple of sneaky beers later, you were feeling much more relaxed. 

For the most part, you'd managed to avoid Sarah and the mommy cult, who mostly stood in a circle, one hot uneaten cupcake between them. There were some lunch boxes with half eaten salads in them, and you were sure there wasn't a crumb of cake left.

You were in the kitchen with your best friend, showing her some of the pictures you'd taken of the day when Richie came in, giving you a nod.

“Oh, perfect timing,” You smiled, holding out your phone to Richie. “How cute is this photo of the girls? I think I'm gonna have to get it framed.”

“Let's see,” Richie smiled, walking closer and accepting your phone. “Well look at that..that's possibly the cutest thing I've ever seen.”

“I'm gonna have to take off,” Your best friend smiled knowingly at you as you raised a brow. “It was a great day, honestly.”

As she was leaving you got a ‘He’s fucking cute’ mouthed at you and you had to bite your tongue.

“I know it's corny but I hope they're best friends forever,” You smiled as Richie handed your phone back. “they're so sweet together.”

“That is so corny,” Richie rolled his eyes with a grin. “But I get it. Even if it is really corny.”

“Shut up and get me another beer,” You raised a brow with a smile. “I should have you thrown out for being so rude to the host.”

“Alright, alright,” Richie held his hands up, walking backwards to the fridge. “I'm truly, truly sorry, you've been an amazing host, really.”

“Thanks,” You smiled, setting down your empty beer bottle. “I was weirdly stressed over all this but..I think it turned out okay? The cake was good, wasn't it? Like, it was okay?”

“Okay? It was out of this fucking world,” Richie opened the fridge, getting two beers from the bottom drawer. “Truly. You made it yourself right?”

“Yeah,” You nodded, accepting the beer Richie handed you with a smile. “I always make Mia's cake. Chocolate cake with peanut butter cups on top, it was what I asked for when I was five. Well, I asked for peanut butter cups instead of a cake but my mom compromised. It would be so much easier to just buy a cake, but..I just feel like I need to overcompensate because..”

“Because her dad is a bum,” Richie muttered, closing his eyes and shaking his head. “Sorry, that was..inappropriate. Forget I said that.”

You smiled as you opened your beer, watching Richie look like he wanted the ground to swallow him. 

“It's okay,” You insisted. “I've called him a lot worse. But I'm glad that the cake went over well.”

“Absolutely,” Richie nodded, taking a sip of his beer before glancing to the door. “Listen, before I forget..I actually have an extra gift for Mia. But I thought I should run it by you first.”

“Oh?” You set your beer down, resting your hands back on the counter. “What is it?”

“These,” Richie reached into his back pocket, pulling out an envelope and handing it over to you. “I managed to pull some strings.”

“What is this?” You smiled, turning the envelope and slowly peeling it open. You let out a gasp as you saw what was inside, carefully taking out a ticket to the Eras tour, looking back into the envelope and seeing three more.

“This is..”

You took a deep breath, laughing after a moment. 

“Richie..have you been walking around all day with these in your pocket?”

“Well..yeah?” Richie frowned, gesturing to the tickets. “I don't know if Mia still likes Taylor Swift but Eva really wanted to go to the concert and I figured if Eva likes Taylor Swift then Mia likes Taylor Swift, probably, and I thought it might be weird or a lot if I took them on my own and I don't even know if you're a Taylor Swift fan but I mean who isn't, really, and I-”

“Richie,” You held your hand up. “This is going to be her favorite gift of all time, it is unbelievably generous of you. I can't thank you enough, truly. This is..amazing, I can't wait to show her.”

Richie was silent for a moment, a smile stuck on his face.

“Don't mention it, happy to do it.”

You waited until all the other guests had left before you sat Eva and Mia down and got them to close their eyes, placing the tickets in their hands. You were pretty sure your hearing wouldn't come back for a solid day or two, you'd never heard screams so loud. 

While the girls played together, Richie helped you clean up, despite your insistence he was a guest and didn't need to.

You were standing on a stepladder taking down deflated balloons, handing them to Richie who was putting them in a trash bag.

“Oh shit, did I tell you about the soft launch?” He asked.

“The what now?” You raised a brow, glancing down at Richie. “What's a soft launch?”

“Like a..trial opening, for the restaurant,” Richie explained. “For family and friends. Just so we can see how it will go.”

“Oh,” You nodded, looking back to the balloons. “I get you. That's exciting, when is that happening?”

“Next Friday night,” Richie held the bag open as you dropped more balloons in. “You should come. Bring a friend, have a night out. I can put you down, if you want?”

You couldn't help but smile at the hopefulness in his voice, turning to look at him and leaning down a little.

“I want that very much,” You murmured softly, lightly biting your lip as you watched him take a breath and lean in closer. You felt your heart race, the scent of his cologne engulfing you and making you want to grab him and jump into his arms when you heard an excited shriek and quickly pulled back, clearing your throat and smiling as the girls came running back into the room. 

When you waved Richie and Eva goodbye, you let out a deep breath as you closed the front door, your heart still racing.

The week that followed was the longest of your life. Days went too slow and too fast. You spent your lunch breaks frantically searching for an outfit for the restaurant launch, sending endless links to your best friend for approval. You went back and forth on whether you should get your hair and makeup done professionally or if that was too much, but what if the restaurant was going to be fancy? You wanted to look the part after all.

When Friday came you raced home from work, changed into sweatpants and a comfortable baggy t-shirt before taking Mia to your friend's house, offering a thousand thank yous for the babysitting and a thousand promises to take them out to the Bear next time.

When you got home your best friend was just pulling up, and you quickly pulled her into the house.

You settled on allowing your bestie to do your hair and makeup, which proved to be the perfect choice when you couldn't stop looking at yourself in the mirror.

The dress you'd ordered hung in the closet, waiting to be worn. It was quite simple, black and mid-length, but still elegant and just a little bougie because..how often can you say you're going to a restaurant opening?

“Ready?” 

You looked up from the mirror, smiling through the nerves.

“Ready.”

When you were walking around the corner to the restaurant, you raised a brow as you saw a line down the block, linking arms with your bestie as you went to join the queue.

“So,” Your bestie looked over to you with a grin. “You're definitely fucking him tonight, right?”

“What?” You laughed, slightly nervously, looking over to your bestie. “Don't be ridiculous, we're just friends.”

“Mm, okay,” Your bestie nodded. “you tell yourself that.”

You rolled your eyes and gave your bestie a nudge, the two of you bursting out laughing.

When you reached the front of the queue, you felt a fresh wave of nerves hit you as you walked into the restaurant. It looked incredible, totally different than it had before. You were just getting used to it when another new sight hit you, one that almost had your jaw on the floor.

“Ladies, welcome to the Bear,” Richie smiled, appearing in front of you in a suit, with a new cologne that had you feeling on edge already. He clicked his fingers and there was a waitress beside you both offering to take your coats. 

“You are in for an incredible evening, when you're ready follow me and I'll take you to your table.”

“Oh yeah,” Your bestie whispered to you as Richie led you to a table. “you're definitely fucking him.”

You slowly relaxed as the evening went on, enjoying having a rare night out. The wine was heavenly, the food was incredible, and having Richie drop by to check in on you was the cherry on the cake.

At some point he disappeared from the floor for a while, and you found yourself missing him, but focused on having some quality time with your bestie.

When you finished dinner, you felt like you wouldn't be able to move for a week, a wonderful feeling. You couldn't believe it when Richie appeared, coming over to your table with a tray in his hand, a plate covered with a cloche.

“Dessert, ladies,” He smiled. “enjoy.”

“Oh I honestly couldn't eat another-”

Your hand flew over your heart as Richie set the plate down, lifting off the cloche to reveal a large peanut butter cup with caramel drizzled around it.

“Thank you,” You managed after a moment, looking up to Richie. “I love it.”

“My pleasure,” Richie gave you a wink. “Enjoy.”

“Alright, smile,” Your bestie grinned, taking her phone. “I need a photo of this.”

After the perfect dessert, you felt like you were riding on a high, catching Richie's eye from across the restaurant and giving him a smile before looking back to your best friend. 

“I'll be right back.”

You got up and went to the bathroom, standing in front of the mirror and taking a deep breath. You smoothed out your dress, did a little over the shoulder look before spritzing on a little extra perfume and heading back out. You bumped into Richie almost immediately, taking a step back with a smile.

“Careful, I might think you were waiting for me,” You teased. “Thank you again for that dessert, and for everything..it's amazing.”

“Glad you enjoyed it,” Richie nodded, looking down for a moment before looking back up with a smile and a raised brow. “Something on my face?”

“No,” You smiled, gently touching his tie. “Just..admiring this new look.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” You nodded. “Listen, I know you're probably gonna be going out to celebrate after this and I am being extremely presumptuous but I've had a bottle of wine so I can say this..”

You took a deep breath, looking away for a moment before looking back to Richie.

“If you're around, later..you know where I am.”

You walked away before he could respond, your heart thundering in your chest. You and your bestie collected your coats and decided to go have one more drink somewhere before heading home in an Uber, your head on her shoulder. 

You waved her off when you got dropped home, heading inside and checking your phone. Your friend who was babysitting Mia asked how the night had been, you sent a quick reply before heading upstairs to change. 

You put on some comfortable pajamas but kept your nice underwear on, just in case. You took your makeup off and did your usual nighttime routine before heading down to the living room and getting comfortable on the couch. 

An hour later you had a knock on the front door, smiling to yourself and getting up from the couch. You opened the door to find Richie on the other side, his head in his head.

“I just hit on your elderly neighbor,” He groaned. “I got the wrong door and said some things..can I come in?”

“Get in before Mr. Williams calls the police,” You grinned, taking Richie's arm and pulling him inside. “There's gonna be rumors about a late night deviant.”

“Hey, less of that,” Richie grinned, closing the door behind him. “I'm a lot of things but I'm not a deviant.”

“So what do you call terrorizing elderly men at night?” You teased. “Because I can think of a few words..like..”

You muffled a laugh as Richie put his hand over your mouth, gently moving your hand to his wrist and giving him your best doe eyes.

“Very funny,” Richie grinned, lowering his hand. “How you feeling? Alright?”

“Me? I'm feeling great,” You smiled, gently taking Richie's hand and guiding him to the stairs. “Let me show you.”

You raised a brow as Richie didn't follow you, turning back to look at him. 

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Richie nodded, clearing his throat. “I just uh..we don't have to just..” He gestured to the stairs and you couldn't stop smiling.

“So you came over to..talk?” You raised a brow with a grin. “watch TV? Have a cup of coffee?”

“Well, not..” 

“Richie,” You smiled, stepping closer to him. “Just spit it out.”

“Right,” He nodded. “Okay, I just..I really want to go upstairs but I don't want you to think I just came over for that like..I'm not that kinda guy, we can go for like a real date, see how this-”

“Richie,” You placed your hand over his mouth, raising a brow. “I know. I'm not like that, I know you're a decent guy. We got all the time in the world for dates, but right now I really need you to take me upstairs and fuck my actual brains out.”

You slowly moved your hand, smiling as Richie immediately closed the gap between you, his arms wrapping around your waist as yours wrapped around his neck. He tasted like cigarettes and whiskey and you couldn't get enough, letting out a gasp as his hands moved down and he picked you up with ease. 

You weren't sure how you had the patience to get upstairs, but the moment you got Richie into your bedroom you couldn't wait much longer, letting out a moan as he threw you onto the bed and immediately began tugging your pajamas off. 

“Fuck,” He groaned, pulling back and looking down at you. “Were you..did you have these on all night?”

“Yeah,” You murmured softly, your hands holding Richie's tie and tugging him down for a kiss. “Am I keeping them on?”

“Absolutely fucking not.”

You lifted your legs, giving Richie a preview of how wet you were, meeting his eyes as he slowly peeled off your pants, tossing them over his shoulder. 

“Waiting for an invitation?” You grinned, laying back and resting your arms by the pillows. 

“Such a pillow princess,” Richie grinned, sitting up and undoing his tie. “didn't expect it.”

“You think so?” You raised a brow, moving your hand down between your legs. “Might have to start without you if you're taking so long..”

You grinned as Richie practically tore off the rest of his clothes, letting out a soft hum as your fingers dipped into your wet warmth, reaching your other hand out to Richie.

“Come on..don't keep me waiting all night.”

“Are you always so bratty?” Richie grinned, climbing onto the bed and watching you closely.

“Sometimes,” You murmured softly, meeting Richie's eyes. “But you can talk, with that pillow princess comment,” You moved quickly, straddling Richie's waist and holding his hands above his head. 

“Maybe I should let you do all the work, for being so rude.”

“Fuck,” Richie muttered, shifting his hips a little. “just say the word and you got it..”

“That so?” You smirked softly. “Might just have to put that to the test..”

“Yes ma'am.” Richie murmured, smirking as he sat up, kissing you deeply and pushing you down onto your back as you let out an excited squeak.

In the morning you texted a picture of a sleeping Richie to your best friend, captioned ‘We're just friends’

Two weeks later you and Richie stumbled upon Sarah's laundry room and made excellent use of the washing machine.

Six months later the two of you take your girls to the concert, holding them up on your shoulders. Richie teases you for singing along and you choose not to point out his hypocrisy, as he belts out every word. He leans in to kiss you and the girls shriek excitedly, you kiss him back and feel like everything will be just fine.