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iwaizumisbabe · 2 years ago

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POLY-PROBLEMS; Bakugō K. & Kirishima E. pt1

NAVIGATION | RULES | MAIN MASTERLIST

← MHA MASTERLIST

→ in which y/n feels left out in the poly relationship with Kirishima and Bakugō

→ Bakugō Katsuki x Kirishima Eijiro x fem!Reader

→ drama, fight/argument, hurt/comfort, happy ending

→ COLLAGE AU / AGED UP CHARACTERS

→ 2.6k

COOMON AREA

"Do you want to have di-"

"No, Shitty Hair and I already have plans today."

"Ohh, okay..." it had been going on like that for weeks, and you were starting to feel like Katsuki didn't really love you anymore, if he ever had - Eiji the same way. Why should Katsuki love me at all? I'm quirkless. Maybe my boyfriend is tired of having to protect me all the time. Maybe the two of them would be happier as a couple?

"I'll be going now...", you mumbled and disappeared to your room. There your thoughts got really bad, you racked your brains for hours and at some point you started to cry - you couldn't take it anymore.

↳ time skip 𖦹

"Do you think it was a good idea to cancel on her again today?" asked Eijiro Katsuki as he stuffed his sweaty gym clothes back into his red gym bag.

"I don't know, Eiji. But our training won't last that long. Let's finish it - after that, we'll have more time for (y/n) again," the redhead agreed with his boyfriend with a nod.

"I still want to spend some time with (y/n) today. Dinner sounds good or something else...", the shorter one suggested.

"That sounds good, I'm hungry anyway; I'm sure you are too...", the blond pressed a kiss to Eijiro's cheek before they both headed back to the Dorms together.

↳ time skip 𖦹

You hadn't heard the door to your room open because of your coughing fit, which you often got when you cried a lot. The redhead immediately ran up to you and took you in his arms - but you only tensed up.

"What's wrong, baby? Did something happen?", Eiji was more than worried, Katsuki at least as much, but he wouldn't - or couldn't - show it. Especially in front of you, his girlfriend.

"Why are you crying again?", even as he was saying it, the blond regretted his choice of words. He knew how sensitive his girl was.

"Tell me, what's fucking your problem, Katsuki? What's fucking wrong with you at all?", Addressed decided to keep his mouth shut - after all, his boyfriend was right.

"Won't you tell me w-", you interrupted him tearfully.

"I don't want to anymore."

"What do you mean?" the two almost-heroes were now even more worried. Was their girlfriend having suicidal thoughts and they hadn't noticed?

"What do you mean?"

"I want you to leave!", a heart-wrenching sob was heard, "I-I don't want this a-any more; leave-me-alone!", Both were shocked by your statement - Kirishima caught himself first.

"But (y/n)-...", he was interrupted by your crying self.

"Go now!", you shouted. Normally, you were the calm one in the relationship. You usually kept your cool and thought rationally. Eijiro and Katsuki were all the more shocked when you yelled at them now. Bakugō grabbed the redhead and pulled him out by his sweater.

"But Katsuki..." he protested, but the blond ignored his objections. Once they were both outside, Eiji wanted to go back in, but again Katsuki stopped him.

"What are you doing? I want to talk to her!"

"There's no point, she doesn't want to see us - at least not now. Give her some time," the addressed one thought briefly and nodded in response, after which they headed out together to get something to eat.

↳ time skip 𖦹

A little more than three weeks had passed and you were still avoiding the boys. Kirishima made himself terrible reproaches, he had not noticed, how neglected you must have felt. Katsuki felt the same way, but he knew very well that it was actually his fault. He had claimed Eijiro for himself so he wouldn't have to train alone.

Some time ago, he had overheard Mina and you talking about men and what you found attractive about them.

You said you were into guys - Katsuki already knew that - who had muscles. Not too much, but not too little either. And even if the blond didn't show it, he really wanted to please you - he didn't even know why.

↳ time skip 𖦹

Two more days later, you still hadn't spoken a word with Eijiro or Katsuki. For today, Aizawa had scheduled a trip to the city, due to all the training of the last weeks.

The perfect opportunity for the redhead to distract himself. The blond, however, refused, preferring to stay in his room, train a little with weights and then sleep - that distracted him best.

So he trained for an hour with loud music, after that he wanted to get something to drink; Katsuki had become thirsty, besides he had sweated a lot.

So the student turned off the music and was about to leave his room when he heard sobs and tearful words. Immediately he knew to whom they belonged. Without really thinking about it, he grabbed the blanket you always used when you were there, stepped out onto his balcony and climbed up the wall by the gutter. Luckily I climb in my free time, or I'd be in trouble right now...

Once at the top, Bakugō spotted you immediately. You were sitting too close to the edge for his liking, but he couldn't really do anything about it. What surprised him was that you hadn't turned around.

Since you didn't have a Quirk, Katsuki had subjected you to intensive training of your senses, as well as combat training, but that had nothing to do with the current situation. Normally you should have heard him, but apparently your current emotional state confused your senses.

"Wh-Why, why?", Katsuki heard your tearful voice.

He hurried to come to you. The blond sat down behind you, wrapped his arms, covered with the blanket, around your cool body and held you tight. Contrary to his expectations, he was not pushed away. Instead, you pressed closer to the taller man, clawing into his shirt and crying harder.

"Why? Why don't you love me?" you sobbed bitterly, pressing your head against the blond's muscular arm.

"Where do you come up with this shit?", so that's the problem, but where does she come up with such stupid ideas?

"You-you're only doing stuff with Eiji now. Neither of you two have time for me. I-I feel like I'm just invisible to you guys," shit, I didn't mean to do that...

"Y-You only got involved because you wanted Eiji. You never wanted M-Me...", your crying fit got worse again. Katsuki didn't know what to do, so he acted intuitively.

He put his fingers under your chin, lifted your head with them, and lightly pressed his lips against yours. Likewise, he applied light pressure. You kissed him back, but seconds later you broke away. You were confused, what was that about?

"What are you doing, Katsuki?", the tears just wouldn't stop. The blond didn't answer for now. He pulled you back to his chest and rested his head on yours.

"I'm... I'm sorry. I didn't want you to feel unloved and unwanted, fluffy cheeks," Katsuki placed a kiss on the top of your head.

"Then why did you do it? Why did you always shut me out?", so slowly you were getting tired, you hadn't slept much lately - and if you had, you hadn't slept well. Still, you tried to look him in the face as best you could. Katsuki, however, pressed your head against his chest again. If he was honest with himself, he didn't want to look you in the eye right now.

"Don't be mad," he said in a slightly monotone. From that, you could tell that Bakugō was going to be uncomfortable with what followed. Katsuki put his head back on yours. He didn't know what to say.

"I... overheard you and Mina. When you were talking about guys. Do you remember that?", you thought for a moment.

"Yeah, I told Mina that I had a thing for - who knew? - Guys and that I like them to be muscular."

"Not too much, but not too little either," the blonde reminded you, "That's why... I've been training with Eijiro so much the last few weeks," somehow Katsuki was embarrassed to tell you that now. Usually the blonde didn't talk much about his feelings.

"I was trying to please you or something," he adds after that and blushed, which luckily for Bakugō you didn't see.

"Are you serious, Katsuki?", now the usually confident boy was unsure. Does she think it's embarrassing that I'm making an effort?

"Tch!" was the only thing he let out. It was a kind of protective mechanism, although he knew very well that this reaction was unnecessary with you.

Completely against Katsuki's expectations, you were pleasantly surprised. You snuggled closer to the tall blond, taking one of his hands in yours to gently stroke from the heel of his hand over his forearm to his very muscular upper arm; up to his shoulder, which you liked to lean against from time to time, and then slowly down his torso. Thereupon you carefully drove under his black tank top and let your fingers wander over his abdominal muscles, which impressed you since you knew him. Slightly Katsuki had to gasp; he had missed the touches of his significant other.

"Hey, Kat; you have just the right amount of muscles...", you wanted to add emphasis to your words, so you ran your fingers over his upper arm once more and planted a kiss on it, then looked up at him.

"Yeah, whatever," Bakugō was happy to hear your words, he was really happy, but didn't know how to react, so he did what he always did.

"Yeah, just like always," you feel sad that Katsuki didn't seem to care about your words. Of course, the blonde noticed your disappointment. Out of intuition, he turned you so that you were underneath him.

He pinned your arms to the floor and stared at you. His plan only went so far and no further. So he just let himself fall on top of you; without crushing you, of course.

Katsuki just didn't know what to do, this back and forth was giving him a headache. The boy wished he could talk openly about his feelings. The whole situation would be much easier then - for everyone.

I should at least try, he thought, it couldn't get any worse anyway.

"Listen..." he mumbled into your T-shirt, "I'm happy when you say something nice me," he didn't like the word compliment, "It's hard for me to show that. I just don't want to look... I don't know, look weak? You know that I love you; both of you," you nodded in response.

"Then what's the problem?", you let your fingers disappear into the blond's hair, thinking about the best way to make him understand your thoughts.

"It's one thing to know that someone loves you and the other to be shown that, you know?", Katsuki didn't quite understand and asked what you meant exactly.

"Look, if I tell you I love you and then ignore you for a month, you don't really feel like I would love you, do you? Even though I told you," now the blond did understand. He didn't even want to imagine how you had felt for the last few weeks.

Silently, the two of you lay on the roof. Katsuki on top of you to keep you warm - the blanket was crumpled up next to you. After a few silent minutes, Bakugō braced himself over you again to face you.

"Are you all right now?" he asked. You nodded, to which you got a grin from the student. Katsuki rolled to his side, pulling you with him and into his arms. He then wrapped the blanket around you.

Very gently, he placed his lips on yours, as he had earlier, and applied light pressure, which was returned by you.

"Good - I love you," he pressed your head against his chest.

"I love you too, Kat," you murmured against his tank top.

↳ time skip 𖦹

Slowly your classmates trickled in, it could be heard all the way to the roof.

"We should go downstairs. And you definitely need to talk to Eiji," you felt sick to your stomach.

"You think he's mad?", the blond shook his head.

"Eijiro has been blaming himself all this time for not realizing how neglected you felt. He's very sorry, although after all it was more my fault than his...", to that you just nodded.

↳ time skip 𖦹

The two of you sat down on the bed in the redhead's room and waited. Only a few minutes later he came in.

"(Y/n), what are you doing here?!", the boy couldn't believe it, you had consistently avoided him for over three weeks and now you were standing in front of him. In his room.

"I wanted to talk to you, Eiji...", now Eijiro got a little scared. Would his girlfriend break up with him for good now? Honestly, he could understand, after all, he had neglected you for weeks.

"A-And about what?"

"Kat, can you leave us alone for a moment?", the blond nodded and left the redhead's room. The latter began to feel queasy.

"Are you alright, Eiji? Why are you looking like that?"

"I'm just a little nervous..." he replied.

"Why is that? It's all good - more or less. I just wanted to apologize and make up with you. I should have talked to you - or both of you - directly," the elder exhaled in relief and slid closer to you in the next moment.

He took you in his arms, pulled you onto his lap, and buried his face in your hair.

"What was the matter? What was so bad that you couldn't talk to me or Katsuki about it?", lightly and briefly he pressed his lips against your warm cheek.

"I-I don't know either... I had the whole time, the feeling like Kat didn't love me. And like the two of you would be happier together. After all, you were just spending time together. It was so awful," you wrapped your arms around Eijiro's neck and sobbed lightly on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry about that, my love. I should have realized we were neglecting you. But it seems you've talked things out with Katsuki.... Is everything alright now?", he took your face in his hands and waited for any reaction from you.

You nodded and the next moment the redhead's lips were on yours.

"Do you want to watch a movie? Or something..."

"Sure, I'll go get Katsuki. You lie down," he brushed the tears from your face and stood up to get his friend in his room.

"Are you coming back in, (y/n) wants to watch a movie," was he waiting outside the door the whole time?

The blond entered the room, wrapped his arms around Eiji and gave him a kiss on the lips, "Finally, everything is okay again," Bakugō turned straight to the bed after that, ran towards it and jumped on it - right next to you. He also gave you a kiss.

"Well; what do you want to watch, fluffy cheeks?", the student stared at you with a grin on his face.

"How about (y/fav movie)?" you gave in a whisper.

He started laughing, "Why was that clear?", still laughing he looked at his friend, "Eyy, Eiji. What are you waiting for? Come here," as if ordered and not picked up, the boy stood in his room and looked to his bed, on which the blond was now lying with outstretched arms. He also threw himself on it.

Bakugō connected his cell phone to the television, which hung across from the bed above Eijiro's desk, and turned on the movie you had asked for. Cuddling, you watched it.

→ PART 2 (SMUT)

2022 © @iwaizumisbabe

IT'S NOT ALLOWED TO COPY/REPOST/TRANSLATE MY WORKS ON OTHER PLATFORMS!

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writemywaytoyourheart · 3 years ago

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Aim For The Heart | Chapter 16: Heartstrings

Pairing: hitman!jungkook x female reader

Genre: romance, drama, angst, fluff

WC: 7.3k

Warnings for this chapter: strong language, teenage heartbreak :(, two bumbling fools that are emotionally constipated, I think that’s it

summary; Jeon Jungkook is an infamous hitman, known for his inability to fail at whatever job is thrown his way. At least, up until now. Y/n, a kind-hearted and full of life teacher, is his newest target. Jeon isn’t sure who would put a hit on this seemingly innocent girl, but fortunately, that isn’t his problem. All he has to do is pull the trigger.

Previous > Next

6 years ago:

"Mina, I'm so nervous!"

Mina laughs lightly at the way you bounce up and down on your bed, "It'll be fine, ____! He'll totally like you back, girl don't even worry about it!"

You let out a nervous giggle as you jump off your bed and run to your closet, "What should I wear?"

"____, you literally have a school uniform," Mina laughs again.

You turn and pout at her, "Heyy, I know that! I was asking which one I should wear, the burgundy socks or the white ones? Tie or no tie? Blazer or no blazer? Long-sleeved or short?"

Mina shakes her head in amusement, "You're cute and he'll think so no matter what you wear," She rubs her chin in thought, "But definitely the white socks, the burgundy tie with the grey sweater vest instead of the blazer, and long sleeves."

You do a little dancy dance of excitement before grabbing the decided clothes out of your closet and hurrying to pull them on. Mina is already dressed in her uniform, waiting patiently as she sits on your bed.

When you're all ready to go, you grab the little box on your bedside table and run out of your room, causing Mina to stumble after you.

_______

By the time lunch rolls around, you're buzzing with excitement at the prospect of getting to see him.

Not to mention being able to finally tell him how you feel.

Mina is by your side the whole way to your locker as you grab the little box out.

She nudges your shoulder as you two walk to the cafeteria, "You can do this, ____."

You nod, your tummy all in knots to the point that you're not sure if you'll even be able to eat.

Despite that, you finish everything on your tray while your legs bounce in anticipation.

Once you two make your way outside to the field, you are trying your hardest not to hightail it back inside. Mina holds your arm though, preventing you from doing so.

"You can't back out now, babe."

Mina's words terrify you but you know she's telling the truth, you can't just go on without at least trying.

A bunch of kids are milling around outside, some of the boys showing off to the girls as they size how tall they are compared to each other.

Then you see him, in all his glory.

He's standing in the field with a few other boys from his class, chatting.

His dark blonde hair glistens in the sunlight as he laughs at something one of his friends said.

You feel your heart leap to your throat and you freeze, "I- I can't..."

"____," Mina turns to you, placing her hands on your shoulders, "I am not about to let you give up now, not right before you do it! Just go over there. If you can't speak, then just hand it to him, simple as that. He'll understand when he opens it anyway."

You nod stiffly, "What about his friends?" Your voice shakes, "I'm scared to do it in front of them."

Mina nods, "I got this."

You're about to protest but she's gone, already marching her way over to them.

You watch in embarrassment as Mina taps one of the boys on the shoulder. He turns and smiles when he sees her. Mina is gorgeous, of course he'd smile when she spoke to him.

You're really her only friend, as she is yours, but the boys are constantly swarming around her nonetheless.

You start to feel self-conscious when you see the boy making your heart thump heavily look at Mina and smile brightly.

Shoot, what if he likes her?

You can't compare to her.

Besides, she's your best friend, you'd give him up for her if she wanted him.

You'd do anything for her.

You snap out of it when you see Mina leading the two boys that were with him away, then she gestures at you behind her back.

You force your feet to move as you hurry over to him before he moves on to talk with someone else.

Just as he's turning, you're coming up.

He almost bumps into you, a surprised gasp slipping from his lips as he notices you.

"Oh, sorry! I didn't see you there."

You smile crookedly, "It's- It's fine!" You squeak out.

His smile widens as he looks at you, "You're ____, right? Tenth grade?"

You nod like a darn bobblehead, your words suddenly stuck in your throat.

He's so handsome.

And cute.

And sweet.

And thoughtful.

And-

"I'm Jimin," He reaches a hand out to you, "It's nice to officially meet you."

You take his hand, letting him shake it as his bright smile continues to beam.

"I know, um," You need to get it together, "You're in eleventh."

He nods, "Yes, only one and a half years left of these ridiculous uniforms," He chuckles.

You nod stupidly, "Uh, yeah," A nervous laugh slips from your mouth.

Just do it, rip it off like a band-aid.

"I uh- I have something for you."

He looks at you with curiosity, his pretty eyes glancing down to the box in your hands.

Then his smile fades.

Your heart stops in your chest when you see the look of recognition on his face.

He's been confessed to before, of course he has.

Your shoulders slump.

You just want the ground to open up and swallow you.

He looks back up at you and gives you a gentle smile.

The smile of rejection.

"____, you're really sweet-"

Oh, no.

"I would say yes in a heartbeat, really. You're different from the other girls here, you care about people, I can tell. I've seen it-"

"But?" Your voice comes out as a whisper.

His smile turns sad, "But there's a girl I like already. I'm sorry, ____."

It feels like someone just tore out your heart and stomped it into the ground.

You don't say anything.

You can't.

It hurts too much.

You just open the box and pull out the note, tucking it into your palm before closing the box again and handing it to him.

Jimin takes it reluctantly, still watching you carefully, his eyes sad and regretful.

"____-"

"I hope you like the cookies," You smile at him, finally meeting his eyes, "Just think of it as a friendship gift, nothing more."

Jimin nods, still looking guilty as hell.

"I hope it works out for you Jimin, I really do."

"Thank you, ____."

Then you turn and walk away, pieces of your heart falling behind you with each step you take.

A minute later you hear Mina calling to you, but you don't stop.

You hurry inside and to the locker rooms.

You're hiding in a stall when you hear the door to the girls' locker room open and Mina's voice call out, "____, are you in here?"

You don't answer and a moment later the door shuts, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You curl up, pulling your knees to your chest as the tears finally come.

You wish you could just disappear.

The thought that you need to see him the rest of this school year and the next before he leaves is sickening.

Your heart has never hurt more than it does now, it feels like a bunch of swords are impaling it over and over again.

Fourth grade.

You had liked him since you were in fourth grade, he was in sixth.

It was the day that you had tripped and spilled your lunch tray all over yourself.

This angel had appeared, pulling you to your feet with the brightest smile you'd ever seen. He had taken you to get another uniform in the office and even got you another tray of food.

He only ever said hello in passing after that, but you were infatuated.

You thought you had loved him.

Another sob cuts through the silence in the locker room as you realize you don't want it anymore.

You hope you never fall for anyone again.

Love is just a terrible joke, made to hurt the weakest, the ones that fall for it.

________________

"____?"

The handsome man standing before you makes your heart lurch.

What kind of joke is this?

You take a step back and clear your throat, "P-P-Park J-Jimin?"

His smile returns as he lets out a small laugh of disbelief, "You remember me?"

You nod reluctantly.

Jimin looks into your eyes just like he did that one day in elementary school, an angel appearing out of nowhere to save you.

"But, how?" He asks, clearly bewildered, "After the accident, you never..."

You suddenly realize you're standing there like an idiot, so you open the door wider and gesture for him to come in.

He walks in and sets the pizza you ordered on your kitchen table.

"D-Do you have t-t-time to talk?" You ask bravely.

Jimin nods, "Of course."

You two end up on the couch, an awkward silence falling around you.

You can't look him in the eyes because every time you do, he's just staring at you like you're the lost puppy he'd been looking for for years.

"It's been so long," Jimin says quietly, "It's been like six years since we actually spoke."

You nod, "The d-d-day you rejected me."

When you look up at him he looks heartbroken, so you give him a small smile, "I'm j-just giving you a hard t-t-time."

Jimin nods sadly, "I'm so confused. I just- I thought you had forgotten me after you were in the hospital..."

You say nothing so he continues, "No, you did. You did forget about me, I tried talking to you and-"

"I know," You whisper, "I'm s-s-sorry Jimin, but I lied."

That makes him freeze.

"You and M-Mina were the only two I r-r-really remembered."

It's silent for a minute, then he whispers, hurt, "But why?"

You look back at him, "It h-h-hurt too much to talk to y-you. I'm sorry."

Jimin nods sadly, "Don't apologize, I understand. But, how did you remember me?"

You laugh, embarrassed, "I had k-kind of been in l-l-love with you since elementary s-school."

Jimin's eyes bulge out of his head, "What?"

"Yeah, since w-we met. After you had h-h-helped me clean the mess I made." Jimin looks lost for a minute, then his eyes light up with recognition, "Oh! Oh, really?"

You nod, another laugh slipping out.

"So, you didn't lose your memory of me...because you still had your memories from elementary school?"

Another nod.

"But then, how did you remember me rejecting you?" The words taste bitter in his mouth.

You shrug, "I don't know, I j-j-just did. A few th-things came b-back to me after leaving the h-hospital."

"I'm sorry that had to be one of them," Jimin whispers.

"It's o-okay, you had n-no obligation to like me b-back," You take a deep breath, already feeling better after getting that off your chest, "Whatever h-happened to the girl y-y-you had liked? Did you a-ask her out?"

Jimin nods with a sad smile, "Yeah."

"A-And?"

"We dated until college...then I found out she cheated on me and we broke up."

Your heart breaks at that, "J-Jimin, I'm so-sorry."

"Don't be, it was for the best."

You sit in more silence for a bit, but this time it feels more comfortable.

Then Jimin speaks up again, "So what are you up to these days, ____? Any special man in your life?" He wiggles his eyebrows at you jokingly.

You laugh, "I am a k-k-kindergarten t-teacher."

Jimin's eyes light up, "Really? Congratulations, ____. You seriously deserve it."

"Th-Thank you. And w-what about you?"

Jimin sighs and gestures at his outfit, "Clearly I'm not as successful as you," You laugh and shake your head as he continues, "I'm just working this delivery job until I get my foot in the door for some journalist positions."

Your eyes grow wide, "R-Really?"

He nods, "I've always wanted to be a reporter, a journalist, something like that. It's a lot harder than it looks though."

You nod, "W-Well I'm rooting for y-you."

"Thank you," He smiles warmly at you, "You were always the sweetest."

You blush at that and Jimin continues, "You never answered my previous question," He squints at you playfully as he points at you, "Any special guys?"

You're about to shake your head, then Jungkook pops into your brain.

His dark eyes penetrating your thoughts, his rosebud lips sneaking into your mind.

Jimin sees you hesitate and a knowing smile grows on his face, "Ah-ha! There is someone!"

You look at him, blushing profusely, "Th-There isn't-"

"Liar!" Jimin cackles, clapping his hands, "You are so in love!"

His words startle you, "I'm n-not! It isn't l-like that."

Jimin wipes at the gleeful tears in his eyes as he leans closer to you, inspecting your face carefully.

"I know that look, ____. You're smitten."

You splutter, "I-I-I am n-not smitten!"

Jimin smirks at you and you fight the urge to smack him.

Then he glances around your living room, "It's beautiful in here, did you decorate it yourself?"

You nod proudly, glad he's changed the subject.

You two make small talk for a few more minutes, just catching up on life.

Then Jimin looks at his watch, "Shit, I gotta go. Bossman will be livid with me for taking so long," He stands up and you follow him to the door.

"Thanks for having me, ____. It was wonderful to catch up with you."

You smile brightly, "I'm s-s-so glad that we were able to m-meet again."

Jimin gives you one last smile as he walks out the door, but before you can close it, he turns around, "Do you..."

You raise an eyebrow in question.

"Do you think we could meet up again sometime? Grab a coffee or something?"

You nod happily, "I w-w-would love that."

You end up exchanging numbers before he hurries on his way.

Closing the door, a huge smile spreads on your face.

Park Jimin.

Your first love.

Delivering a pizza to your door.

Who would've thought?

After a moment to process, you start to giggle uncontrollably.

What the heck just happened?

_____________

Jungkook is jogging up the stairs leading to your apartment when a pizza delivery guy comes down at the same time.

He smiles at Jungkook and moves past him.

Thinking nothing of it, Jungkook hurries to your door and knocks three times, waiting anxiously.

The door opens rather quickly like you'd been standing there.

"Ji- oh..."

Your eyes are wide as you stare at Jungkook.

He gives you a small smile, "Um, hi."

He sees you swallow thickly as you observe him, it takes you a minute to respond.

"H-Hi."

Jungkook bites his lip, not sure how to go about saying what he wants to say next.

"W-What are y-you doing here?" You beat him to it.

The way you say it makes his stomach turn a little.

When he doesn't respond, you sigh and reach up to rub your tired eyes, "J-Jungkook..."

He wishes he could say something, anything.

But it's like every single word he's ever known is suddenly gone out of his brain and he knows nothing.

You look so sleepy, the events from the past week are probably weighing on you right now.

Jungkook thinks as his gaze drifts over your exhausted face, his heart pulling apart in his chest as Mina's story comes barreling back into his mind.

After another beat of silence, Jungkook finally finds his voice and you decide to be honest with him at the same time.

"____, will you go somewhere with me-"

"J-Jungkook I'm t-tired of th-this-"

You both shut up and look at the other.

Jungkook's heart sinks in his chest at your words.

Your own heart feels like someone is poking at it with a sharp stick.

"What?" Jungkook whispers.

You cover your face with your hands, "I- I j-just..."

"Can I come in? Please?" Jungkook asks hopefully, wanting to correct things before shit hits the fan.

You nod and open the door wider for him to slip inside.

He immediately notices the pizza box on the table and his mind wanders back to the guy passing him earlier. He lets it go as he stands there, waiting for you to shut the door.

You do, then you walk over to the couch and plop down, curling your legs up and tucking them near you as you grab a pillow and hold it tightly to your chest.

Jungkook takes a few very deep and very calming breaths before walking over to the couch to sit down.

He needs to just keep breathing, or else he'll mess shit up again with his stupidity.

You fidget quietly as Jungkook stares at the Barbie movies in the glass cabinet under the TV. He doesn't know why he can't seem to look away from them.

"She just finds comfort in things like coloring, watching movies, eating sweets. Her brain was damaged, badly. But it's gotten so much better since then, she's made so much progress. She might act like a kid sometimes, but she isn't one and doesn’t think she is. ____ was innocent before and she's innocent now-"

Jungkook's breath hitches as he remembers Mina's words.

"Did y-you speak t-to M-Mina?"

Jungkook turns to you when you speak up quietly, noticing the way you won't even look at him. Your eyes are locked on the pillow in front of you as you pick at the loose threads.

"Yeah," He mumbles back.

You finally raise your eyes to his, "I- I think you sh-should leave."

Jungkook's heart stutters painfully.

"____, I need to talk to you."

"A-About what?"

"I-..." What does he say? He needs to get you out of here, he's run out of time, "I know this sounds dumb, but would you go somewhere with me? Just for a little bit."

You just stare at him, your eyes reflecting a pain he's never seen in you before, even after he was horrible to you in the rain, even after his dumb ass forced you to go home and ruined your day.

This pain is a first.

He shifts his body towards you more, "____, what's going on? Are you oka-"

"No."

He freezes, his mind short-circuiting at your bitter response.

"No, I'm n-not. I'm n-n-not okay."

You can see the way his eyes flicker back and forth between yours and it makes your heart race.

You can't handle this.

You don't like pain, you don't like it.

You always run from it.

Maybe you are just a child.

More reason to put an end to this anyway.

The insecurities swarming your head finally come out, in an angry huff of air, startling Jungkook when you stand up abruptly, still gripping the pillow.

"I n-n-need you to leave."

Jungkook stands up too, his tall frame looming over you and making you look down at the ground.

"I can't," He mutters.

Your eyes trail up to his, anger burning in them.

Why is life so unfair?

Why can't someone just like you, for you?

Why does reality always have to come and bite you in the butt?

"Go to M-Mina," You seethe.

Jungkook looks at you like you're crazy, his mind going in circles trying to figure out what the hell you're talking about.

"____, what?"

"You h-h-heard me," You swallow the lump in your throat.

Curse this stupid stutter.

You can't even tell someone something and be taken seriously.

Jungkook shakes his head slowly, his confused gaze locked on your angered one.

"Why would I want to go to her?"

You scoff, making Jungkook take a step back to observe you in disbelief.

What happened to you?

Were you really that mad about him asking you for her number? He didn't need it because he liked that brat, he needed it because he needs to save you.

But you don't know that.

How could he expect you to?

"Just...get o-out," Your voice is thick with tears.

Jungkook shakes his head again and takes a step towards you, his hand stretched out.

But you step back, away from him.

"Stop h-h-hurting me!" You suddenly raise your voice. It isn't anywhere near a yell but it shocks him enough. You never raise your voice...

"I'm sorry-"

You close your eyes and take a long breath as if to calm yourself down.

"I kn-know you like M-Mina. Don't m-make me hurt anymore by h-having to let go while y-y-you're standing right in f-front of me!"

Jungkook steps forward and grabs your hand, but you don't open your eyes.

You dare not look at him.

Not ever again.

Or you'll break.

You love Mina more than anything, you'd do anything for her.

That's why she was always pushing you away from Jungkook.

She likes him.

And of course, he likes her back.

The pain in your heart is causing your breath to shorten.

If you look at him now, you won't have the strength to give him up for her.

"____, I swear I don't like her-"

It isn't true.

"I just needed to ask her something!"

Stop trying to spare me the pain, just leave me alone.

"____, please look at me," Jungkook pleads.

No.

You shake your head, keeping your eyes closed tight.

Jungkook sighs in exasperation, "I had to ask her about your accident!!"

At that, your watery eyes slowly open.

Jungkook breathes a sigh of relief when he sees your beautiful eyes land on him.

Then you take your hand out of his and he feels his next breath stutter.

"What?" You whisper.

The words get caught in his throat for a second before he's able to shove them out, "I had to ask her about Kihyun, and the accident...I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I swear ____, I don't like her like that. Hell, I don't like her at all! Not to mention she hates my guts!"

Your jaw clenches and Jungkook wants to just beg you to listen to him, to please not be mad and just listen to him.

"I w-was in a c-c-car accident..."

Jungkook does a double-take at your words.

"What d-d-d-does that have t-to do with you or Kihyun? How is th-that any of your business?!"

Jungkook just stares at you as your face turns red, "I w-want you to leave me alone p-please. Stop playing w-with my h-heart and running out on m-me."

Jungkook feels like he's about to explode.

With anger, sadness, regret, and this weird protective stuffy feeling he gets when he's around you.

"I'm sorry-"

"And I f-forgave you."

He flinches at that.

"But an empty a-apology means n-nothing, J-Jungkook."

"It-...It isn't empty. ____, I know I'm stupid, I'm a grade A idiot! A fucking moron! But I never meant to hurt you by running out, I just- I panicked..." He's fumbling over his words, not even understanding what he's trying to say at this moment.

"W-Why would you g-go behind my back to t-talk about me?! Why not j-just come to me??"

"I didn't think you-"

"Didn't think I r-remembered it?"

Your voice is bitter, laced with hurt.

Jungkook nods slowly.

You scoff, "Y-You're right, I d-d-don't. I had to rely on M-Mina to tell me that m-my family died in a c-c-car crash and I w-was the only one that survived."

His chest hurts.

"Did y-you want to m-make fun of m-me? Figure out exactly w-why I sp-sp-speak like a fr-freak? Why everyone t-t-treats me like a ch-child?"

Jungkook's brows furrow, "Why on earth would you ever think something like that?"

"B-Because I'm n-not like you, J-Jungkook. You c-could get any g-g-girl that you want, but I w-was stupid enough to th-think it would be-...never m-mind."

Jungkook's brain is racing, he has no idea what you're getting at.

He doesn't understand what the hell girls are thinking or trying to say.

He knows he's an idiot, he doesn't know how to fix that.

But he needs to fix this.

And quickly.

He steps forward to grab your hands again, but this time you don't pull away, "____, I never meant to make you think I was using you to get to Mina if that's how you feel. I wasn't. I needed Mina to tell me because I was worried about you, I swear," His voice is firm.

You look at him, unsure.

Jungkook sighs, "I didn't go to you because I thought that you wouldn't remember, but more so because I didn't want to hurt you further if you did. I didn't want to stir up anything that you'd want to put away. I realize now that that was shitty of me to go behind your back, I should've come to you first, it was your story to tell. I'm sorry."

You blink, taken aback by how honest and sincere he seems right now.

You'd been hurting from all the running away and ignoring you and all that he's been doing recently.

This is the first time it feels like he's actually taking you seriously.

You bring your eyes up to his, "I'm s-s-sorry for lashing o-out. I have f-f-feelings like every-yone else and I w-was hurt."

Jungkook nods, "It's okay, I'm sorry too." His deep brown eyes search yours carefully as you continue, "You c-c-can like Mina, I-I-I underst-stand. She's b-beautiful..."

Jungkook takes you by surprise when he starts to chuckle. You look at him curiously, "W-Why are you l-l-laughing?"

Jungkook gently lets go of your hands, making you miss the warmth of them instantly.

He brings his hands up to run through his hair, "I can't believe you think I'd fall for Mina."

You scowl, "Why w-wouldn't you?"

Jungkook lets out an amused scoff, "She's not my type."

"Oh, y-yeah? What i-is your type then?"

He looks at you and you make eye contact for a second before your gaze darts away. Jungkook keeps his eyes on you for a moment longer.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Jungkook says teasingly, noting that your cheeks turn pink as you shake your head in denial, "I d-d-don't care."

He laughs lightly and you feel your heart lift in your chest.

A minute passes in silence as the two of you try to think of what to say next.

You're a bit embarrassed about your outburst, but you know he understands.

You were valid in your feelings and he seems genuinely sorry for everything.

Jungkook's head is in a completely different place, trying to go about how to ask you to leave Seoul with him.

This is ridiculous, you'll never agree.

You watch as Jungkook's eyes dart around the room as if he's trying to figure something out.

"Y-You okay?" You ask, a bit worried.

Jungkook looks up, his eyes finding yours.

Just do it, Jeon.

Don't be a wuss.

"Will you leave Seoul with me?"

He blurts it out, figuring he'll chicken out if he doesn't.

Your eyes widen and you're shocked into silence for a good minute.

When the initial shock leaves you, you blink a few times.

Jungkook just stands there stupidly.

"Um..."

He winces at your hesitation although it was inevitable.

"...w-why?"

Damn it, he knew you'd ask, you'd be stupid not to.

He needs to make something up, fast.

"This- this seems like the worst timing possible... But I was...invited to uhm, to a thing, a thing in uhm, in Busan. It's like uh, a uh, a school reunion? Thing? Kind of? It's uh...."

Fuck he's a bumbling idiot.

Before he can make a bigger fool out of himself, you burst into laughter.

His chest feels lighter at the sound.

Well, at least he made you laugh...

You wipe at your eyes as you double over in laughter, a good contrast to what you were doing a little while ago, so he'll take it.

Jungkook just stands there, his arms crossed over his broad chest as he watches you make fun of him.

When you finally catch your breath, you look at him to see him scowling darkly.

You feel like it would scare anyone else, but it doesn't scare you.

You poke at his chest, the last of the giggles leaving your lips.

Jungkook stiffens when you touch him, but he will not let you know that your touch affects him.

"Are you finished?" He asks, trying to appear unamused.

You nod, still wiping away the tears of mirth from your eyes.

"So, w-what you're tr-trying to say is, you want me to go to B-Busan with you for a school r-r-reunion?"

He nods in embarrassment at the silly lie.

You laugh again, "Well, w-why didn't y-you just say that? I'd l-love to g-g-go with you!"

Well...that was easy.

Jungkook bites back a smile at the way you shake your head and giggle at him.

"W-When is it?"

"We'd have to leave tonight...like, you should pack now."

"Oh," You look at him in surprise, "Oh, um. O-Okay...how long w-will we be gone?"

The ridiculous contrast to what was happening a few minutes ago and now is going to give you whiplash. A moment ago you were yelling at him to stop hurting you and now you're agreeing to go to Busan with him...

What kind of a day was this?

"Uh, I'm not sure, I was hoping to just spend some time there and go sightseeing, maybe?" Jungkook answers your question awkwardly.

Your warm smile makes him swallow painfully, "I w-would love that. School d-doesn't start for an-another three weeks."

"Perfect," Jungkook nods, "Then it's settled, go pack."

You shriek in excitement and hurry to the back with a little skip to your step, "V-Vacation!"

Jungkook lets out a long breath, his heart skipping a beat at the happy humming floating from your room.

Thank goodness he was successful in that.

But what makes him feel even better, is the fact that your beautiful smile is back.

__________

"Sh-Should I tell Mina?"

Jungkook's grip tenses on the wheel at your words.

He isn't sure why, but he doesn't want Mina to know where the two of you are going.

"Nah, I already told her I was going to ask you to come with me. She knows," Jungkook prays that you'll fall for it, biting his lip harshly.

"Oh," You squeak from the passenger seat.

He swallows his heart that leapt to his throat at the adorable sound.

You look out the side window, watching as the sun starts to set, your head leaning against the glass.

"How l-long will it t-t-take us to get there?" You ask quietly, your eyes still glued to the beautiful colors running across the sky.

Jungkook glances at his phone where the directions are.

"Mm, since there's hardly any traffic, hopefully four hours?"

Your eyes widen a little and you make a small sound of acknowledgment.

"Hm, ok."

Jungkook drags his eyes back to the road, telling himself that he's not allowed to look at you the whole way lest he get distracted and crash the car like a fool.

Jungkook has some soft music playing in the background, making you smile softly to yourself. You didn't think him the type of person to listen to classical instrumental music, but it's nice and relaxing, especially for how tired you are.

An hour into the drive, you feel your eyes getting extremely heavy. You keep blinking them rapidly to keep yourself awake, but every time you blink it gets harder and harder to open them again.

Jungkook, as well as he had done the first hour, fails his own rule as he glances at you.

He had noticed the way you were shifting and jerking around for the past few minutes.

"Hey, you okay?" Jungkook asks gently before returning his gaze to the road.

You nod sleepily, a tiny yawn slipping out of you.

"J-Just a little s-sleepy is all."

A soft smile appears on Jungkook's face and you feel your chest warm at the sight. You can't stop staring at his side profile, the line of his jaw, and his adorably big nose, even his lashes are long and beautiful.

"You can take a nap you know-"

"Nooo, no no," You wave a hand in the air dismissively, "I'm n-not tired at all!"

Jungkook stifles a laugh at you contradicting yourself within thirty seconds.

He nods, "Okay, then you don't have to take a nap."

You smile drowsily, appearing almost drunk in a way.

Jungkook glances at you again.

Drunk from exhaustion, you most certainly are.

What a rollercoaster of a day.

He sighs, a gentle sound as he turns back to keep his eyes forward, "You look really sleepy."

"Y-You look really p-pretty..."

Jungkook, startled at your words, looks at you with wide eyes, "Huh?"

No one has ever called him pretty before...

You have an elbow against the console, your chin in your hand as you gaze up at him dreamily.

"I'm s-s-sorry I said all th-that mean st-stuff back at my apartment," You whisper, lips turning down into a pout.

Jungkook fidgets, "It's fine, ____. I deserved to get snapped at."

You shake your head, "Noooo," You say cutely, smacking your lips, "Nooo, you d-deserve th-the whooooooole world!" You gesture out, almost smacking him in the face.

Jungkook chuckles.

You're just tired yet you act like you've been drinking nonstop.

"You, J-Jungkook, you d-deserve to a...a? A h-hug."

He feels a pinching in his chest at your words.

"Thanks, ____."

You nod, your head lolling to the side as you start to drift off to sleep again, then you jerk suddenly as you remember something.

"M-My first love!"

Jungkook looks at you, bewildered.

"He-...b-brought it to me..."

Jungkook arches an eyebrow at you, "Who brought what to you, ____?"

"An angel brought m-me food t-today!"

Jungkook nods along with your nonsensical rambling, "That's cool," He muses as he passes a car on the highway.

"Yeahh..."

After that, you fall silent.

He glances over at you after you haven't spoken for a few minutes, to see your head resting against the seat, your mouth open slightly as you sleep soundly.

He fights the smile that's creeping its way onto his face, trying as hard as he can to pay attention to the road.

Jungkook reaches up a hand and slaps it across his face, harder than he had meant to.

He winces in pain, but at least it got him to think straight.

Jungkook keeps his eyes on the road (mostly) the rest of the way.

It's kind of lonely with you sleeping beside him, but he doesn't really mind.

It's around one in the morning when Jungkook gently shakes your shoulder.

You stir, your eyes opening into little slits as you look around in confusion.

"W-Where am I?" You ask, mumbling almost incoherently.

"We're here, ____. We're in Busan," Jungkook says softly, his hand still on your shoulder.

Once you're able to open your eyes all the way, you see the inside of Jungkook's car, then you turn your head to the right to see him standing outside your door, holding it open as he smiles at you.

"Oh," You say in surprise, "I f-forgot we were on v-vacation."

Jungkook chuckles at that, "Come on, ____. Let's get you to bed."

He reaches around you to unbuckle your seat belt, then you watch quietly as he grabs your purse and slings it over his shoulder.

Next, he grabs your hand and helps you out of the car.

You take in the sight of a small motel, very simple, very dark, and very very cute.

Jungkook watches your eyes light up at the place you'll be staying tonight.

"It's s-so cute," You whisper sleepily.

Jungkook shrugs, "I've never considered a motel to be cute before, but it's decent."

You keep a hold of his hand as you climb out of the car, then you shyly let go and follow him to the trunk where he pulls out both of your suitcases.

"I can c-carry something," You offer as you see him start moving with both of the cases to the front of the motel.

Jungkook shakes his head, his floofy brown hair flopping about, "I'm all good."

You bite back a laugh at the sight of him wheeling two suitcases with a purse slung over his arm, then you hurry to catch up to him.

Inside, there's a very small old man at the front desk, reading a newspaper.

He looks up when you and Jungkook walk in.

A friendly smile graces his features as he sets the paper down, "Hello there, how can I help you?"

"Hi," Jungkook clears his throat, "I called about two rooms earlier today...well, I guess it was technically yesterday..."

The man nods and grabs this little notebook, "Perfect! Name?"

"Uhm...Jungkook, Jeon Jungkook,” He says lowly.

Ohhhh, Jeon?

Even his last name suits him.

You see him fidgeting a little as the older man flips through the notebook, "Ah yes! Right here."

Then he turns to grab a key out of a little cabinet, "Your rooms will be one twenty-three and one twenty-two-"

He pauses, his hand freezing over an empty cubby in the cabinet.

"Uhm...one moment."

He shuffles behind a little curtain leading to a different room.

Jungkook looks back at you with a puzzled expression and you shrug, you don't have any idea what's going on either.

A minute later the man comes out with a regretful look on his face.

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Jeon. It would appear as though someone accidentally gave your rooms away without looking at the reservations," The man looks terribly guilty.

Jungkook bites his lip, "Uhm, alright, well can I get two other rooms then?"

The man nods quickly and ruffles through his notebook, then he looks at Jungkook again.

"We only have one room available. I sincerely apologize, this was my mistake-"

"Don't worry about it," Jungkook gives him a tight-lipped smile, "We'll take it. Thank you."

After getting your key, you and Jungkook walk out to find your room, not speaking until you get there.

Once Jungkook unlocks the door and opens it for you, he gives you an embarrassed smile, "Sorry, ____. I would take us somewhere else but it's late and-...I'll sleep on the floor."

You turn to him, "D-Don't be silly. We'll both sl-sleep on a bed."

He looks at you, bewildered, then his gaze follows your outstretched arm as you point at the bed.

Or...

The beds.

AH! A MIRACLE!

Jungkook sighs in relief, letting the door close behind him as he sets your suitcases to the side.

"Well this isn't so bad," He says as he looks around the room, taking in the twin beds with satisfaction.

Then he looks at you to see you gazing around in wonder, gently touching the bed and making your way over to the bathroom to peek your head inside.

When you turn back to him, your eyes are lit up like stars in the night sky.

"It's b-beautiful!"

Jungkook does one more look over.

There are twin beds with white covers and pillows, a nightstand between them and TV on a desk in front along with a coffee machine and glass mugs.

Meh, it's not a crappy place, he's been in far worse, but he's also been in far better.

Then something clicks and he looks at you again, "Wait, have you never been to a hotel- or- a motel before?"

You shake your head, your innocent eyes never leaving his.

Jungkook lets out a short laugh of disbelief, "Huh."

You walk over to your suitcase and grab it, pulling it with you to the bathroom, "I'm g-going to change."

"Uh-huh," Jungkook says, still trying to process the fact that you've never stayed in a place like this before.

When he hears the bathroom door close, he walks over to his suitcase and opens it up, grabbing out a t-shirt and some pajama shorts.

He makes quick work of changing, then he settles on the left bed, a groan leaving his lips as he lays back.

A moment later, the door to the bathroom opens and Jungkook sees you walk out shyly, a simple lilac nightgown draping around your frame.

He looks away quickly, fixing his gaze on the black screen of the television positioned in front of the twin beds.

You hurry over and climb into the bed on the right, slipping underneath the covers and sighing happily.

"Th-These beds are s-so comfy!"

Jungkook hums in response, his eyes still glued to the TV even though it's off.

You pull the covers up to your chin and close your eyes, letting out a tiny yawn.

At the sound, Jungkook's resolution crumbles and he glances over at you.

The way your eyelids flutter and your lips part slightly as you breathe makes his heart beat rapidly.

Suddenly, your eyes pop open and you're staring right back at him.

He was so startled when it happened that he didn't even look away, instead, his gaze stays locked on yours, eyes wide.

It feels like an eternity passes as the two of you just stare at each other, but it's really only a few seconds.

Long enough for Jungkook's heart to be in his throat and your tummy to start tickling.

Then you whisper, "I w-was just going to a-ask you to turn out the l-light."

A choked breath escapes Jungkook as he snaps his gaze away from yours.

"Oh, yeah sure."

Without looking at you, he reaches over to the table between your beds and flips the light off.

It's silent for a little bit, then Jungkook hears you whisper in the darkness, "I'm sorry a-about earlier."

"You already apologized, and I told you there was no need to."

You sigh and shift onto your back, "When is th-the school reunion?"

Jungkook internally groans, "It's in a few days."

"W-Why did we have t-to leave so quickly?"

Jungkook moves to his right side, so he's facing you in the darkness, but he can't make you out.

"I wanted to be sure we got a place to stay before it all filled up."

"Ah, okay."

Fuck, he hates lying to you so easily.

The fact that you have full trust in him is making him sick to his stomach.

But at least he got you here.

He's gotten you out of Seoul.

That buys him a bit more time to figure out who the hell placed the hit on you.

Then he'll take matters into his own hands.

After a few minutes, Jungkook is sure you've fallen asleep again, so it takes him by surprise when you speak up.

"What is y-your favorite flower?"

"Uhm, I'm not sure...I don't know that many flowers," Jungkook replies, his eyes still closed.

You giggle, "My f-favorite is the a-almond flower."

Jungkook nods thoughtfully, then he realizes that you can't see him so he clears his throat, "Ah, what does that one look like?"

"It's little and w-white with a h-hint of pink in the middle. V-Very cute."

Jungkook smiles, "Sounds very fitting for you."

Your cheeks heat up as you cuddle more into the covers, "Do y-you want to know th-the meaning of it?" You whisper.

He finally opens his eyes, but all he can see is darkness, "Sure."

He suddenly remembers your letter to him after you visited the field of dandelions.

What did you say the dandelion represented again? Oh yeah, hope and happiness...or something like that...

"It m-means h-hope and renewal."

Jungkook hears you shifting a little to get comfortable.

"That's nice," He says gently, "I guess the little simple ones tend to represent hope, huh?"

You positively beam, realizing that he must have remembered your letter to him about the dandelion.

"I g-guess so."

Jungkook turns onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.

Before he can back out, he asks, "What does the lotus flower represent?"

"Is th-that your f-favorite?"

Jungkook blinks a few times before answering you, "It was my mother's."

You sit up and look over at him curiously, wondering if something had happened to her with the way his voice sounded and the fact that he used past tense.

"Oh...w-well I happen t-to know that one," You lay back down, "It m-means enlightenment and r-rebirth."

Huh.

How ironic.

"Ah," Is all he says.

You lay there in silence for a little bit, then you remember something that you had wanted to tell him.

"Oh y-yeah, I had the w-weirdest dream the other day."

"Mm? What was it?"

"I w-was laying in a f-field of flowers. Purple f-flowers-"

Jungkook's brain suddenly snaps to attention at your words, "What did they look like?" He asks abruptly, interrupting you.

"Uh, they w-were some of m-my favorite flowers, they're c-called Agapanthus."

"Agapi- what?" Jungkook asks, face scrunched in confusion.

You laugh and blindly reach for your phone on the nightstand.

Jungkook looks over to see a blue light illuminating your face as you look at your phone and his breath gets caught in his throat.

Fuck.

Don't be stupid, Jungkook.

He looks away quickly.

"H-Here," You stand up and waddle over to his bed, plopping yourself down on the side of it and jostling him a bit. Jungkook swallows thickly at the close proximity all of the sudden.

You hold your phone close to his face, watching as he squints at the picture of the flower you were talking about.

"A-Agapanthus," You state again, smiling.

But Jungkook barely hears you, he's frozen, staring at the picture in your hand.

That's the flower that was in his dream the other day.

The field was full of them.

"Anyw-way, I w-was lying there. It w-was so vivid. Th-Then I realized I was h-holding someone's hand-"

Jungkook can't tear his eyes away from your phone, his heartbeat increasing the more of your story you tell.

"I c-could tell it w-was a guy's hand, b-but I couldn't turn my head to see who it was."

His eyes finally drift from your phone up to your face where you're sporting a faint pout.

He doesn't know what possesses him to ask, all he registers are the shaky words suddenly coming from his mouth, "What's the meaning of this flower?"

Your gaze shifts to his and you smile softly, "L-Love."

__________________________________

a/n: jk is a damned fool, who’s with me.

Tag list; @hopekookies @moonchild1 @barbellastyles98 @teresaisla @ggukkieland @mwitsmejk @scuzmunkie @jaebeomsblackgf @sugaslittlekookies @moon-asia @bangtannie7 @yoonchrisgull @njkbangtan @higashikatasgf @jksbbyfacebunny @sweetonkookieandtae @voidswan-recs @sadxaries @bts-junseagull @jinfused @taehyungiev13 @gaeguuliii @kimnamjoonluvbot @jungkooook @mutterseelenalleinn @surilirani @patpus @yukiehyukie @crypticsabbat @ohyeahjk @steffiiirose @the-falling-star @telepathytae @erenkook

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suchalonelysunflower · 3 years ago

Text

Take Your Feelings, Put Them Into a Song (A.I)

Pairing: Ashton Irwin x Wallows! Fem! Reader

Requested: yes!

Summary: Y/N Sixx, bassist from the famous band Wallows, is helping 5SOS write their latest album CALM. If only she could keep her crush on the drummer under control…

Warnings: Fluff. Language. Some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 4.6 k

Author’s Note: IM BACK! Remember that Reblogs, Likes, Comments and Feedback are very important! You have no idea how much they help 💕 Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🦋🌻✨

My materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?

anon: Can you do a one-shot where the reader was born on 1996 and she’s the daughter of Nikki Sixx and Brandi Brandt and it’s the bassist and songwriter of Wallows (…) and she helps 5sos write songs for the album CALM and starts dating Ashton and the fans go nuts (in a good way) with shipping? There’s no drama like it was in EUH

It was another boring day in the studio and you would literally prefer to do anything else than to listen to Cole talk about the last date he had instead of working on your new song. But inspiration was lacking between you and your bandmates and you really had no other choice since you already took that time on the studio’s schedule.

One would believe that you would be used to dull times in the studio, having spent a lot of time on them while growing up with your parents, but boredom was a cruel crime inside your head and today your patience was running thin.

“Hey, peanut!” Dylan called your attention “Everything good there?”

You were laying on the sofa, looking at the ceiling for some kind of saving grace, but Dylan’s voice brought you back to your reality.

“Are we going to get something done today?” You asked with a sigh, with your eyes still glued to the ceiling “Cause we are really just wasting time by now and I don’t think Cole’s last fling will bring any kind of inspo into our little group”

“Hey!” Cole protested, earning a chuckle from Braeden.

“Whatever,” You said, already getting up from your spot “I’m going to take a walk”

You took a deep breath once you closed the door to your private room. You loved the guys, you really do, but sometimes people can be too much, especially people who you spend every single day and hour with.

Memories from the past year started to fill your mind and you smiled when thinking about how much your little band has grown. Wallows was now everywhere, you created a name for yourself without using your parent’s influence and you were so damn proud of that, yet when moments like these come around - the moments where you just need to breathe to escape the reality for just a while - you start to reflect on every choice you made and if they were the right ones.

It’s the overthinking that got you to write those first lyrics in the first place, the ones that were put into songs and now were, somehow, all over TikTok with thousands of people relating to them. So maybe, overthinking now might not be such a bad idea after all.

“It’s a terrible idea if you think about it for more than one minute, mate”

You stopped in your tracks when you heard that voice, thinking that maybe you were finally going crazy or someone could’ve read your mind. But it wasn’t until you heard someone else answer that you realized it was a conversation.

“Well, I don’t know what to do with it anymore!”

You turned your head to the left and smiled when you saw the little sign that said “5SOS now in session. DO NOT DISTURB” And realized that your other favorite boys were back in town.

Of course you ignored the sign and knocked on the door a couple of times before opening it shamelessly.

“Well, well, well…” You said with a teasing smile as you leaned over the door frame “If it isn’t my second favorite Aussie band”

The faces of two of the members of said band light up once they realize it was you, quickly getting up to wrap you in a hug.

“Mini Sixx!” Calum said, ruffling his hand through your hair “About time you came to visit us”

You pushed him and Luke away from you “And you should’ve told me you’re back from your break! I could’ve escaped Dylan and the other minions earlier”

“Rough session?” Luke asked, seating down and patting the place next to him for you to sit on.

“Oh, you have no idea”

You loved the 5sos guys, it was impossible not to. Ever since you met them at a label party in 2015 when you were introduced to them because you were the same age as half of the group, you knew that they were made to be on the stage.

It was easy to become their friend, given their welcoming attitude and easy-going smiles even before they found out who your parents were. It was nice for a change not to be Y/N Sixx, daughter of the famous bassist of Mötley Crüe and famous Playboy doll Brandi Brandt, for a moment and just be Y/N, a bassist that had a lot to give to the world. And with the boys you didn’t even have to try to be someone you were not, with them everything was just so… real.

Just like now, where you were allowed to complain about your lovely bandmates to them and they would complain just as well, with no judgment nor responsibilities, just three friends letting out some steam due to the stress of your careers.

“-And basically we don’t know what else to do with the song” Luke finished his rant on the missing piece of their new song for their next album.

“And you have the lyrics ready?”

“Yeah, me and my girl wrote it a few weeks ago but the melody is just…”

“It’s missing something” Calum finished for him with a sigh.

You hummed “Can I see it?”

The two Australians got to work, playing the song with the piano and the guitar and you came to the conclusion that they were right: there was something big missing.

“So it’s a ballad,” You said, thinking of ways to fix it.

“Technically yes, but when you play it like that it sounds incomplete and the lyrics won’t work with another type of rhythm” Luke sighed “We’ve been at it for days now.”

You stayed quiet for a while, reviewing the lyrics and melody more carefully now, analyzing the situation with different approaches but without getting anywhere. It was a beautiful song, it truly was, but it needed something else, something that could create a “boom” sensation for whoever was listening.

Something like…

“Hey guys, have you finished with the- Oh, Hey, Y/N/N!” Ashton said, opening the door and finding you with his bandmates in deep concentration.

Bingo.

“Uh, why are you smiling at me like that?” Ashton asked you with a chuckle, but you didn’t even address him as you turned to Luke and Calum.

“It needs drums”

“What?” The three men said in unison. You rolled your eyes and snatched the notes from Calum’s lap and started to sing the melody.

“Here!” You pointed out “In this part, before finishing the first chorus: I already made, already made that…” And then you started to make drum noises and movements with your arms for them to get the idea.

In a matter of seconds, Luke got up from his seat and walked towards you, taking the notes from you and reviewing them with new eyes, smiling as he got the idea.

“Ha!” He laughed loudly, “You’re a fucking genius!”

“Thank you,” You said with a smug smile as you, Calum and Luke started to discuss the arrangements.

“Wait, hold up” Ashton interrupted the chatter “Y/N, I appreciate you trying to help and no offense and all but I think this isn’t your place to just decide something like that,” He said, pointing to the three of you.

You rolled your eyes. You’ve dealt with stubborn people before, but Ashton did take a spot on your top three and you knew just how to handle him.

“Wow,” You said sarcastically with a teasing smile “One would think that by being half of the rhythm section you would have more… I don’t know, rhythm?”

Ashton crooked an eyebrow and you and you knew you had him in the bag “I just don’t think-”

“You don’t think?” You said, getting up from your chair and walking up to him to be almost chest to chest. You looked up to his eyes and challenged him “Or you just can’t handle the fact that I might’ve had a better idea than you”

You could see by the sparkle in his eyes that he has taken the challenge to heart. He took a step closer to you, almost pressing his body completely against yours, and smirked.

“Want me to prove you wrong, princess?” He teased but you didn’t back up.

“I’d like to see you try, darling”

Ashton’s smirk widened as he took a step back, turning his head towards Luke and Calum who were watching the scene with intrigued eyes and knowing smiles “Get your asses back in the recording booth”

He followed them as they walked into the big recording space they had, but not before sending you a wink seconds after he closed the door.

You were thankful he didn’t see you blush.

Once they were all set with their instruments - Calum on the keys, Luke on the guitar, and Ashton behind his drum set - You pressed the buttons of the console that would make it possible for you to hear them at the other side of the mirrored glass.

“Okay boys, show me what you got”

You became an official 5SOS songwriter after that day and even Ashton had to admit that you were adding so much more to the band lyrics and melodies since you started to work with them.

Every day you would find yourself walking towards their studio after your band’s session and you start to work wherever they left off. It was a simple dynamic that worked wonders for everyone and after every session, you would get even more inspired to write your own music for Wallows, so it was a win-win situation, not to mention, spending time with your new co-workers; especially a particular drummer that grew closer to you that you would’ve ever imagined.

When you first met the band you hit it off pretty quickly with Luke and Calum, them being the same age as you and having pretty much the same interests; then came Michael that shared a similar sense of humor with you and with whom you discussed videogames with. But Ashton was always the one that you consciously tried to not get too close to.

In all honesty, he intimidated you but not in a bad way. He was smart, talented, and super funny, not to mention also ridiculously handsome. But he was also stubborn, a little bit egotistical, and the only one that could keep up with you in a battle of wits, teasing, and sarcasm. And you knew that if you mixed that all together it might mean trouble, especially when he smiled at you like that.

Of course you had a crush on him, who wouldn’t? But the fact is that you know what it is like to date in the industry and having feelings for a member of another pretty famous band might bring some tension to the table, so it was safer to play the crushing card and just stay friends. Or at least that’s what you tell yourself every day since you started to see him regularly and spend more time with him than with any other of the two bands.

Speaking of…

“Earth to Y/N?” Called Braeden waving a hand in front of your face “Is anybody there?”

You blinked a few times before pushing his hand away with a scoff “Very funny, B. What’s up?”

“You spaced out again” Cole added, fidgeting with his drumsticks “Just when we were going to start complimenting you on that bass line you wrote the other day…”

You smiled as you threw a pillow at him that he was able to easily dodge “Sorry, I was just-”

“Thinking about a particular drummer again?” Dylan teased, to which Cole added.

“I knew it wouldn’t take long for you to fall in love with me”

You searched for other pillows and started to throw them at your band members, giggling as they started to throw them back at you and starting an improvised pillow fight in the middle of the recording booth.

“Hey, Y/N/N! I was wondering if you-” Ashton’s sentence was cut short as he opened the door and took in the scene that was in front of him.

You were so busy chasing Breaden with a pillow on each hand and a devilish smile that you didn’t even notice when the door opened or that Ashton was standing there, smiling at you with his arms crossed as you aimed at your bandmate's head.

“Oh look, peanut!” Dylan said teasingly “You knight in shiny armor is here to-” But before he could say anything more embarrassing, you threw a pillow directly at his face to shut him out.

You quickly turned your head to Ashton who was fairly amused by your battle skills and smiled at him.

“Hey!” You said breathlessly after chasing down the others.

“Hi,” He smiled back “Am I interrupting something or?”

“Nah, you’re good,” You said, throwing one last pillow at your three friends that stood in a corner blowing teasing kisses and puppy eyes at the two of you “These assholes and I are done for the day” You commented before said assholes started to pout and complain, but you were already out the door before they could say something embarrassing again.

“So…” Ashton trailed off, starting to walk alongside you with his hands in his front pockets.

“So,” You said, drifting your eyes from him and praying to the universe that he didn’t hear anything or else it would make the blush on your face even pinker “You needed me for something?”

You wanted to get the topic of work right there in the open as soon as possible, not wanting him to notice how nervous you got when you were alone with him. At least when you were talking about work you leveled the ground in some parts.

“Actually, I’m going home early today” He smiled softly “Luke and the guys are working on a love song that’s just way too happy and butterflies - in - your -stomach like and I didn’t think they needed me there if I can’t bring nothing to the table”

“You’re not a lovey-dovey feeling kinda guy?” You teased by bumping your arm with his, earning a “hey” from him “I actually get it, I’m not that kind of person either”

“It’s not like I don’t like it, it’s just that-”

“You process your emotions differently, and it’s easier to write those when you think of love in other stages and/or mixed with other complex emotions because-”

“Love is not just one-sided! Yes!” Ashton celebrated, amazed that you could understand what he was saying “I knew you would get it”

That comment made your cheeks heat up as you looked at him, all dimpled smiles and light chuckled as he looked at you with sparkly hazel eyes. Oh no…

“Well,” You said, breaking that little moment “If they are going to work on that all day then I guess I would head home, too. I don’t think I’ll be able to provide anything else either”

“Actually,” Ashton said as he stopped in the middle of the hall leading to the exit, making you stop as well and turn to him “I was wondering if you would want to get some coffee with me now that we are both free. Of course, if you really are free and have nothing else to do and want to actually drink coffee or tea�� or maybe not and you’re not that type of person and-”

“Are you asking me out?”

Ashton stopped his rambling and looked at you with an incredulous smile and lightly blushed cheeks.

“I- well, yeah,” He said shyly “Yeah, I am”

You smiled and softly chuckled “Look at the famous drummer all nervous” You teasingly took a step closer to him, not knowing where this confidence was coming from, and he did the same “It’s just me, you know?”

“And that’s exactly the reason why”

“Do I make you nervous, darling?”

“Let’s say that if it were anyone else, I wouldn’t have rambled like that, princess”

You pressed your lips in a thin line and smiled as you looked away from him, blushing like a teenager on her first date.

“So…” You trailed off.

“So?”

“Lead the way”

From that moment both of your routines changed once again. Now you took time off the studio at least two times a week to go with Ashton on those small friendly dates as he took you out for coffee or just simple but meaningful talks.

Soon enough you lost all the doubts that made you nervous around him, seeing how easy it was to talk to him and how much you had in common in more aspects than just music. You became more comfortable around him and your level of teasing and playing grew alongside your relationship, not to mention the level of teasing and playing you received from your band members and the other 3 Aussies who joined in on all the fun.

You were used to blushing and dismissing comments about your - undeniable - crush on the drummer, but Ashton didn’t seem to be affected by them at all. On the contrary, Ashton played along and even seemed like he was enjoying it. Like in one particular occasion where you were working on a song together and Michael said:

“Oh my god, date her already!”

Ashton didn’t blink an eye before responding “I’m trying! But she just wants to focus on the harmonies”

And you’d be lying if you said that didn’t put a smile on your face.

Yet, you kept it all professional while being in the studio; no need to mix your personal lives with whatever was going on down there, that’s why those coffee runs were your favorites.

It was an unspoken rule between the two of you that “work-talk” was forever banned from those outings.

“So what are we going to talk about?” You asked him the first time you went into his favorite coffee shop.

“Us” He simply answered, unaware of the butterflies he just set in your stomach.

“Us?”

“Yeah, I want to get to know you better, princess. Who is Y/N Sixx?”

“Who is Ashton Irwin?”

“I asked first”

“I asked second” You countered

Ashton smiled widely “You think you’re clever…”

“It doesn’t matter what I think” You answered, casually sipping on your coffee “I know I’m clever just like I know you like me that way”

You were testing the waters back then, hiding the shaking of your knees under the table as you longed to know how he felt about it. But the way he smiled and how he blushed a little bit made all your fears go away.

“Yeah, that I do”

Your cheeks turned red whenever you reminisced about that moment - or any moment that you spent with Ashton for that matter - which gave you the perfect idea for a song.

“I don’t want to kill my time with somebody else…” You hummed to yourself as you wrote down what you think is the chorus to a new song.

You told Ashton that you were not the type to write silly love songs or very uplifting songs; but there was something in that memory, something in that feeling that you couldn't ignore or just let it be without doing something about it. So, you started to write it.

You couldn't separate the feeling from the art, after all, feelings were what led you to dedicate your life to music. People would say it was because of your parent’s influence but they had little to nothing to do with your decision. This was you, the authentical you writing whatever came to mind and then sharing it with the world and only a few people will get it in its entirety. And surely Ashton was one of them.

“Dadadada something, want you all to myself”

“Wacha doing there, princess?”

Speaking of the devil.

Ashton smiled at you as he hunched over the table you were working on, trying to peek at what you were writing. You lifted the notebook and pressed it against your chest faking offense as he giggled.

“Didn’t your mother taught you not to sneak up on people, darling?” You asked as he walked around your workspace and sat himself down on the chair next to you “Besides, you’re late. You were supposed to meet me here like half an hour ago!”

“Aww, sorry Sixx” Ashton pouted “But there were no chocolate chip cookies left in the shop so I had to go around town to get you some” He then put a bag of freshly made cookies on top of the table with a cup filled with coffee.

“You didn’t have to do that, you know?”

“Of course I did! You always only eat chocolate chips cookies in the afternoon”

He started to giggle again, ignoring the way you were looking at him “How did you know that?”

“C’mon, Y/N/N, every time we go for coffee you order two, one for the coffee and another one for the road. And every time we cater something you never touch anything but those cookies”

“I never knew you were so observant”

Ashton shrugged “I just pay attention if I like what I see,” He said nonchalantly with a wink, making you blush instantly, but you covered it up with an eye roll.

“God, you’re terrible” You scoffed.

“I’m honest!” You shook your head and went back to writing, but Ashton was not going to let that go so easily. “Look, how else could I know that you always put an extra bag of sugar in your coffee?”

“‘Cause I always drink the same thing,” You said without looking up from your notebook.

“Yeah, a mocha latte with extra chocolate drizzle and no foam. Honestly, how can you handle that much sugar?” You were about to answer but he caught you off. “But that’s not all you drink, whenever you have a bad day you always order a cup of mango and ginger tea because that’s your mother’s favorite drink and it helps you calm down. You also don’t want anyone to know that you’re having a bad day but the minute someone looks away your smile starts to flatter until you’re back in the conversation”

You stopped the writing completely as you turned to him, suddenly feeling how your heart started to jump all over your chest as he kept talking, eyes never leaving yours as he gave you a soft smile, almost as if he was remembering all those moments with you.

“You draw flowers on the corner of your notebooks whenever you feel bored. You love the sad songs on the radio and you know every single word to Lorde’s Melodrama, yet every time you have to choose a playlist you put 2000’s pop and R&B songs because it hypes you up. You hate awkward silences unless you are the one being quiet. You help Dylan dye his hair every time he asks you to because you would trust each other with your lives, you give Cole relationship advice because you care about him and he always appreciates your advice more than anyone’s and Braeden is your best friend because you always say that he is one of the few people that could make you laugh in a bad day and you have no idea how much I want to be included in that list”

“Ashton-”

“You write better with dim light, it helps you concentrate on your work. You say you don’t believe in astrology yet you check your horoscope every day. You want to make sure that everyone has a good time and feels included, that’s why you always make conversations with Micahel about games you never even heard before or let Luke braid your hair when he’s bored or how you switched topics when you noticed that Calum was not engaging as much in a conversation. You literally take care of everyone but you never let anyone take care of you, and when we do you get all shy and you blush as you say thank you and you have no idea how fucking adorable you look”

You sat there speechless as he spoke. You felt the back of your throat dry as you tried to find the right words to answer all of that.

It was too much. The fact that he knew all of that and how he said it like he was just talking about his favorite things in the world, it was just too much but at the same time, you want to hear him say that again.

A weird sense of joy and shyness came over you as he set his hazel eyes on yours. You gave him a small smile as you averted your gaze to the floor.

“Wow, I-” You started “I never thought someone noticed all that”

“How could I not?” You heard him say “You’re all I can think about and to say that I don’t notice you is like saying I don’t notice the sun in the sky or the stars at night. You’re the brightest light out there, Y/N, you shine everywhere you go”

You noticed how he pulled his chair closer to you and suddenly you felt how your chair started to slowly turn his way until you were face to face.

Ashton carefully placed his fingers under your chin and tilted your head until you were finally looking into his eyes again.

“There she is!” He smiled when he noticed your blushing cheeks and gleaming eyes.

“What do you mean when you say I’m all you think about?” You asked expectantly, curling your fingers nervously on top of your thighs.

Ashton chuckled. “Well, if you didn’t notice, I really fucking like you, Y/N”

You looked up at him, smiling with hopeful eyes and feeling as if a weight was lifted off your chest thanks to the joy you were experiencing while hearing those words.

“You do?”

“Unless you don’t like me back and I just spilled my feelings for nothing-” You smacked him playfully in the arm “Ouch! I’m kidding! Of course I like you! Fuck, Y/N I’ve been falling for years now and I thought I was being pretty obvious”

You laughed “I thought you were just playing!”

In an instant, Ashton pulled your chair closer and grabbed you by the hip, lifting you up and making you sit on his lap as he hugged you by the waist and you placed your arms around his neck.

“I’ve never been more serious in my life,” He said, “I’ll do anything to prove it”

“Well,” You said, pressing a kiss to his cheek and knocking your forehead to his “How about you help me finish this song and then you take me on a date? Cause I’ve been falling for you, too and I don’t want to waste any more time”

Ashton hummed as he nuzzled his nose against your cheek, kissing it softly as he murmured “Will I get to kiss my princess at midnight?”

“Maybe… or you can take your chances now if you’d like”

He smiled.

“I like those odds”

And just before you know it, he softly pressed his lips against yours; finally creating a happy beginning for the two of you.

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thewritetofreespeech · 4 years ago

Note

hello! can you write scenario for akashi, aomine, kise, and kagami where their s/o is jealous of all the attention they're getting from other girls?

awwww. adorbs! certainly ^_^ 🖤

Jealous S/O

Akashi

It’s not a surprise that he was popular.

Akashi was smart, handsome, rich. Great at academics, and sports, and the youngest student council president in the history of Rakuzan. You didn’t believe in people being perfect, but if ever someone was going to get close it would be Akashi. He really lived up to the ‘Emperor’ nickname.

And what was an Emperor without his court.

“What’s wrong [Y/N]?” You look up from the pavement as you walked to class to see Akashi staring at you. His gaze focused, but soft & concerned. “You seem distracted.”

“Oh…it’s nothing.” You tuck your hair behind your ear. Prepared to let this go. Of course, Akashi wouldn’t let it though. He continued to stare at you until you finally broke down and told him. “It’s just them.”

The red head turned to look where you had jutted your chin towards the girls, huddled behind one of the pillars in the court yard whispering & staring, and your boyfriend let out a sigh. “Ah yes. Them.” He doesn’t seem surprised by their presence. Nor their borderline stalking. You should have guessed that he knew they were there. “I just choose to ignore them. However, if they are making you uncomfortable, I can order them to stop.”

You shook your head. You didn’t want to cause trouble. And although it was annoying, you didn’t want to break another girl’s heart over their rejected feelings. “It’s not a big deal. It’s the burden of dating the ‘Emperor’ I guess.” His lips scrunch. Though the nickname stuck over time, you know he doesn’t actually care for that title. “I just feel a little bit like one of those women in a historical K-drama. You know, like someone is waiting in the wings to knock me off so they can take my place near the emperor.” Sometimes you kind of feel like I should start checking my lunch for poison or glass.

Akashi scoffed a little. Then leaned in to kiss your cheek. “That’s never going to happen.” He assured you. “My heart belongs to only you. And, if anyone were to hurt you, I’d gouge their eyes out.”

Perhaps it’s poor form to giggle at such a threat, but you do. He really was so protective of you. You really had no reason to be jealous, because no one was going to take Akashi away from you.

You continue on your way to class. The ‘court’ suspiciously hanging back more than usual after that day.

Aomine

The street ball court was a buzz as usual whenever Aomine played.

His ‘quick game’ with the challenges on the court had turned into a full basketball brawl that had lasted for hours. One-on-one after one after another.

Not that you minded. Watching Aomine play, and seeing him happy, was always thrilling. He always looked so cool when he played; giving his all, even against weaker players. You chuckle to yourself. He really was a terrible guy to take such joy in crushing people. But then what did that say about you when you were so turned on by it?

“That dark skin guy is so hot! Do you think he’s foreign?”

You turn away from the court to a gaggle of girls, some your age, some older, watching the game as well from the side lines. Some had noticed the game and come to watch. Others had come with their own boyfriends. You frown a little as they continue to whisper and gush over your boyfriend. Getting moodier by the second.

“Yo, what’s up?” You look up from glaring at the lines on the court; just in time to see Aomine place his ball he was holding in one hand against your head. “You look pissed. Are you not having fun?”

“Not really.” You confess, batting his hand away. You weren’t having fun now. He was talking to you, but those girls still couldn’t take their eyes off them. “Can we go now?”

“What?? But things are just getting started.” He lifted his shirt up as he whined to wipe the sweat from his brow and you could practically hear the siren like squeals from those thirsty ass bitches.

“I don’t like the crowd here.”

Aomine seemed to catch on, and looked to the side to see who was annoying you. You have to assume he expected to see some guy making you uncomfortable, based on his expression, but looked surprised when he saw it was just a bunch of girls; totally playing it off like they weren’t staring at him a moment ago. “What can I say babe? I can’t help it if girls think I’m super hot and junk.” His cockiness and smirk were not attractive at the moment.

You continue to pout, but just long enough for Aomine to lean in and give you a peck on said pout. “Let me kick this guys ass and then we can go. ‘Less you wanna stick around and make ‘em jealous back. We can do gross couple stuff until they get weirded out and leave.”

You chuckle again at the offer. Appreciating the gesture he was trying to make. “Go play your game and then we can go. If we’re going to do ‘gross couple stuff’, I’d rather do it in private where we can enjoy it.”

Aomine gave you a big grin, followed by a loud, “yes ma’m!”

Of course, he slaughtered the guy in the next game. Leaving him to sulk off back to his own girlfriend; who was indeed in the pack and not looking too happy about it. You both leave after that to finish your date. Aomine proud as a peacock for the rest of the afternoon from the ego boost.

Kise

It was hard, dating a model.

You knew of Kise’s profession before you started dating, of course, but you had no idea how hard it would be on your relationship.

Girls stopped him every chance they got to ask for his autograph, or gush over his new photobook. He of course was courteous and polite. Turning on that model charm. He always thanked them for their patronage of his work and they promised to always support him. It had been bad before, but ever since his game was televised this past season, it had grown into a circus. Not only was he the beautiful blonde-haired boy they all admired, but now he was also the super-hot jock they all drooled over. You could barely go out on a proper date anymore without being accosted by some female vying for his attention.

“[Y/N]-cchi, what’s wrong? You look upset.”

“This is ridiculous!” You told him, and you weren’t just talking about his huge sunglasses & stupid hat he was wearing to try and be ‘incognito’. It wasn’t working even a little bit, so now it was just doubly stupid. “Why can’t they leave you alone for 10 minutes?!”

“They’re my fans [Y/N]-cchi. I can’t disappoint them!”

“Right. Don’t disappoint them. Why don’t you hang out with them today then?” You mutter sullenly. Prepared to leave.

Kise seemed to realize what was going on, and just how upset you were, as he reached out to grab you hand. “I don’t want to hang out with them [Y/N].” You turn back around when he said your name like a real person. Not the cute little way he did it as part of his act. “I don’t want anyone else but you. They only like me because I’m handsome and a model.” Humble too, you think to yourself. “They don’t really care about me. You do! I don’t want to lose that. Please forgive me.”

He did genuinely look hurt, and you have to believe that he meant it. You sigh. It wasn’t totally Kise’s fault. “It’s alright Ryouta.” You tell him. He seemed to perk up a little at that. “If you could maybe not lay it on so thick for them in the future, I would appreciate it.”

“Of course [Y/N]-cchi!” He cheered with a beaming smile. Already back to his normal self. “I’d do anything for you!”

It doesn’t stop of course. But Kise kept true to his word and politely asked to be left in peace. Most respected that. Some weren’t as understanding of his needs. You just appreciated that he was trying to keep them at bay. Fangirls were weird.

Kagami

After practice, you and Kagami went to Maji Burger, as per usual. And, as per usual, people were staring at your table.

Most of the time they were staring at the loud, tall teen scarfing down his body weight in hamburgers. Amazed at his own personal eating contest. However, more recently, the people staring were girls from your school who had also come here. And they were staring at Kagami only.

He was completely oblivious to it, but Kagami was actually really popular; even before Serin started wining so much. He was tall, athletic, built. He’d come from America, which was so cool for a lot of the students around here. Plus, he had this whole ‘bad boy basketball star’ vibe going. If they only knew how much of a sweet heart he really was. Actually, scratch that. If they knew that would only make it worse.

“Hey, what’s up [Y/N]? You’re not eating. Do you not like your food?”

You look up from your own, normal portion on the tray, then back down as you play with your food. “It’s just hard to eat when people are staring.”

Kagami blinked. Then looked around to see what you were talking about. “I don’t see anybody.”

“Of course you don’t….” You mutter under your breath. He never did.

“What does it matter?” He asked. “It’s not like I can stop people from looking at me. They have eyeballs. It’s a free country.”

“That’s not the point Kagami. It’s not that they’re looking at you. It’s the fact that they’re looking at you.” You’re trying to be discrete here, but subtle or discretion never really got through to Kagami. “They wanna fuck you.”

Kagami choked on his burger halfway devoured in his mouth. “Don’t say that!” He scolded you. Once he’d recovered from his near-death experience.

“Well, it’s true. Maybe that’s a bit much, but they definitely look at you that way, and it’s annoying.”

“How can you even tell?”

“Because it’s how I look at you.” You muttered under our breath again. Fidgeting with our soda straw to avoid eye contact.

Kagami heard you again though and now you were both blushing in the booth. “Well…the only one I’m interested in looking at me that way is you.” He muttered back. “The only one I’m interested in looking at that way is you.” His leg moved forward under the table to touch yours. Simple, secret, intimate.

You smile softly as you realize it was stupid to be jealous. Kagami had no guile. He was honest to a fault, which was another of his amazing qualities. He genuinely didn’t see those other girls because he was only focused on you. So let them stare. There was no way they were going to take him away from you.

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alch3mic · 4 years ago

Note

Beast or Prince's darling discovering their yandere tendencies? I'd love to see some drama go down

Strange how the twisting shadows of night made the estate halls feel so.. unfamiliar.

Those once pristine and well decorated walls that lured you into the estate so long ago now looked tainted by the darkness scrawled upon their surface, while the tile flooring felt even colder beneath your bare feet as you traversed the dim halls with nothing but a cellphone flashlight and the rain to keep you company.

Thunder and lightning crackled outside distantly, enlightening the hallways briefly in brilliant white flashes before plunging them back into the depths of obscurity. It, along with the deafening sounds of rain pattering against the windows, was enough to make your heart nearly pound right out of your poor chest.

.....

Was this some kind of classic horror movie set up or what?

Sheesh!

Talk about cliché! The only thing that was missing from this scene was some kind of terrible scary monster or knife wielding psycho lurking around the corner, and then you’d be the star of the next box office thriller!

At least the thought was funny enough to make you chuckle before another flash of lightning and crackling of thunder made you nearly jump out of your own skin.

...

.....Maybe.. you should’ve stayed in bed..

The thought of turning your butt right back around and just returning to your room was rather tempting.. but..

You had three burning questions in your mind that you just knew would keep you up all night if you turned back now.

Number one, what was that loud crashing sound that had woken you out of your dreams? You’re at least very certain it wasn’t thunder because the storm only started a few minutes after you left your bed.

Number two, why was the power out? Never, in all of your time of staying here, had the lights ever gone out like this. Papyrus once told you they ran on their own line out here on the estate with their own generators, separate from the city grid just so they could keep things on in case of a city wide power outage. So.. why? Why was the power out, even before this crazy storm even started? What happened?

And lastly.. number three..

....Where was Sans?

He had bunked with you in your room today after a late night of playing some video games together, but when you suddenly awoke he was... gone.

That had concerned you, because he wasn’t there when the crashing sound happened, which meant he left sometime before the storm started. It wasn't until you found his phone still placed upon your nightstand that your worries grew. He always kept his phone on him..

Now straddled with anxiety you gathered yourself before heading out in search of your boyfriend.

Just where in the world did he go?

.....

You checked your cell phone again.

...Still no service.

Dammit.

Great.. juuuust great.

...Maybe Sans' would..?

Nope.

That was a bust too.

You let out a huff of annoyance, even trying to wave his phone above your head in the hopes of getting a single bar of service, but it was to no avail.

There was another moment where you looked back to the hall you had just been wandering through, wondering if you really should just head back.. but..

It was foreign now.

You in all honesty had no idea where you were.

Like, you weren't even sure if you were in the west wing anymore, the once bright halls becoming like an endless labyrinth or darkness and spooky noises.

....

..Well, looks like your only choice now was to press on in hopes you’d find one of the brothers. The estate really was big, but they had to be somewhere..!

...Right..?

.........Right.

So onward you walked.

......

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Even the soft steps of your bare feet made eerie echoes that resounded with the quiet hum or rain.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Another flash of lightning and crackle of thunder, another small scare.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

A left..? Or maybe a right? Well that flower pot looked familiar at least. ...Maybe..? K-kind of?

.....

Alright maybe you were a little scared now.

How could you not be!?

Everything felt tense and haunting, your anxiety spiraling the more you wandered around in the dark! Maybe this was just a dream.. a weirdly realistic dream.. and you’d wake up to find yourself still nicely snuggled in bed with your bone friend all safe and soun-

Wait.

.....That was..

Oh! You recognized those doors! They led out to the garden!

That sinking feeling in your chest was replaced with a sense of hope as you finally gained a sense of your surroundings, taking a few hopeful steps forward.

BANG.

You nearly screamed as the double doors out to the garden swung open accompanied by a flash of lightning. Thankfully the light faded just in time for you to see..

"Sans!" you called out as your skeletal boyfriend stepped inside and shut the doors behind him.

You quickly approached, stopping just a few feet away.

"You're...!" you inhaled sharply, gazing upon him. "...Soaking wet!"

And also dressed.

No longer was he adorned in one of his cute sets of pajamas, but a clean white button up, dark pants, heavy boots and thick work gloves, all now sticking to his bones from being soaked by the rain.

A deep sigh came out from your boyfriend and he shook his head, drops of water twinkling as they caught the light before splattering to the floor, while other droplets were just encouraged to finish their run down his face.

"HEH. IT'S REALLY IS RAINING SOMETHING FIERCE," he muttered lightly. "I'M THANKFUL TO SEE THAT DAMNED SKY TUCKED AWAY SINCE IT'S BEEN SO SUNNY THESE PAST FEW WEEKS BUT.. WHAT TERRIBLE TIMING."

You closed the distance between you two, stopping once more right before him and looked up and down in worry.

"Are you-" you began, but he merely reached out to gently catch your chin in his gloved hand.

It felt wet and cold, sending shivers down your spine.

"I'M ALRIGHT DEAREST," Sans chuckled, his eyelights roaming over your face.

"..Really?"

The ever so familiar hearts in his eyelights seemed to grow a bit bigger as he looked at you, his hand leaving your chin to carefully brush a few strands of hair.

"REALLY," he confirmed.

You found yourself shivering once more as his cold gloved fingers lightly lingered on your cheek before he fully retracted his hand and began pulling his gloves off.

"AND WHAT ABOUT YOU MY DEAR? ARE YOU ALRIGHT? IT'S QUITE DANGEROUS TO BE WANDERING AROUND SO LATE ESPECIALLY IN THE DARK."

"..I'm fine," you said, your hand reaching inside your pocket to pull out his phone. "I just.. woke up to a crashing noise and you weren't there. Then I saw your phone and it started raining like crazy and the lights wouldn't turn on so I got.."

You flushed a bit when he smiled at your ramblings.

"..Worried."

"HEH. THOUGHT I DO APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERNS MY SWEET, YOU SHOULD NEVER WORRY ABOUT ME," he chuckled, taking his phone. "I'M HERE TO PROTECT YOU, ALWAYS."

He didn't even give the device a look over before stashing it into his wet pocket, shoving his gloves into another one and began rolling up his sleeves and loosening his collar.

A strange silence fell for a moment as you both stood there, a small flame being ignited in your chest as you watched him move.

"..Sans?"

"YES, DEAREST?"

"Is everything really okay?" you asked quietly, your hand scrunching up the fabric at the end of your pajama t-shirt.

"OF COURSE!" he said, giving you one heck of a cute smile. "...WELL, I MEAN.. THE POWER IS STILL OUT AND I AM SOAKED TO THE BONE, BUT YES EVERYTHING IS FINE MY LOVE."

....

"...You're lying to me, aren't you..?"

....

Sans didn't say another word, instead just keeping that impossibly sweet smile swept over his features as he stopped unbuttoning his collar and looked at you for a moment.

His silence was calculated, just like his expression and his movements. For he knew that if he spoke anything more, you'd catch on more to the underlying anger in his tone.

It was the exact kind of anger that always stuck around after something happened.

You've.. gotten better at hearing it over the months that you've become closer to him.

At picking up the emotions he hid behind that princely charm and smiles.

It's how you could tell that things were absolutely not alright.

That he was lying to you.

...Again.

Once again you were being kept in the dark about something.

Once again Sans was covering your eyes from seeing clearly.

Why..?

Even though the two of you had grown so close. Even though you've swore to him to the moon and back that he could trust you. Even though you promised..!

Why does he still..!?

.....

He offered his hand to you, catching your eye before you looking back up at him. That smile of his turned just a bit fonder, and he merely tilted his head in a quiet encouragement for you to take his offer.

Stand your ground.

Don't let him do this!

Not again!

....

Quietly you took his hand, the feeling of his bones damp and clammy against your warmed skin from having your fists clenched so tightly before.

He bent in, and placed a tender kiss upon your check, making you shiver from the cold water that trickled on to your neck and shoulder.

Then he pulled back out, giving you one more loving smile before taking a step, and then another..

And you did the same, following as he led you away from those double doors out to the garden and back into the blackened halls from whence you came.

His boots squeaked against the marbled floorings and loose raindrops continued to descend down his skull, followed by the soft patter of your feet as he led you without another word.

...Again.

Again you were.. too afraid to say anything. The words came bubbling up your throat, threatening to break free at any moment.

But you kept your mouth shut tight.

You were afraid....

Of what the truth might be.

Of this fairytale that you so desperately sought and now finally had.. falling to pieces.

Of who your Prince Charming might really be.

Was he really the soft, sweet and lonely skeleton you saw beyond all of the make believe? Or was he..?

.....

Another distant flash and strike of thunder, and once again the halls were enlightened.

Your gaze dipped only for a second from Sans' back, enough to catch a bare glimpse of something before it became dark once more.

....

That..

Couldn't have been right..

..Right?

Something like that... shouldn't be...

.....

..No..

Your eyes were certainly not deceiving you.

You know what you saw.. without question, even in the passing light.

For at the very edges of Prince's dampened white shirt.

...Was red.

"DEAREST."

"Y-yes?"

"JUST REMEMBER, I LOVE YOU VERY, VERY MUCH... AND THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE ALRIGHT."

check out my other writings | feel free to drop me a ko-fi!

#you should've known better #to leave your room so late at night #but sometimes your curiosity and concern get the better of you #it'll be alright #prince!sans #sans #undertale #underswap #underswap sans #us sans #sans x reader #reader insert #undertale au #drabble #yandere #yandere sans #wickedtale #alch!writes #anon

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inevitably-johnlocked · 3 years ago

Note

Hello there!! Do you have a list of long fics with a jealous/possessive/obsessive sherlock? Thank you mwahhh

Hey Nonny!!

I DO!! I actually started a new list for Possessive Sherlock awhile back waiting for someone to ask for it after I posted my other two lists, LOL.

I put my fics in word-count order, so just scroll down until you see a word count you like and go from there LOL :D

Hope you enjoy!

POSSESSIVE / OBSESSIVE SHERLOCK Pt 3

See also:

Jealous & Possessive Sherlock

Possessive Sherlock Pt 2

Jealous Sherlock Because John Dates a Man

Jealous John Pt. 2 and Jealous Sherlock Pt 2

Jealous John Pt 3 and Jealous Sherlock Pt 3

Jealous John and Sherlock Pt. 4

Jealous John and Sherlock Pt. 5

Possessive by Fang323 (T, 850 w., 1 Ch. || John Whump, Hospitalization, Possessive / Protective Sherlock, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort) – His John did not belong. Not here. Not in this blasted hospital. It simply was not logical.

Concussions And Good Old Fashioned Awkwardness by Belldere (K+, 894 w., 1 Ch. || Humour, Hospitals, Mild John Whump, Misunderstandings, Platonic Relationship, Concussions, Not-Gay John, Possessive Sherlock) – When John lands himself in hospital... again, all he wants is to just get out of there as soon as possible, too bad his doctor has other ideas about where John may be getting his injuries. Good thing concussions make everything strangely funnier.

Burn Burn by Jenn1984 (K+, 925 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG, Angst, Worried / Panicked / Possessive Sherlock) – A week after the events of "The Great Game", Sherlock returns to 221B Baker Street to find it empty.

His by I'm Nova (T, 1,042 w., 1 Ch. || Humour, Hurt/Comfort, Manipulation, Possessive Sherlock) – Sherlock doesn't share what he's fond of.

Mine (He Says While Still Being Smol) by beejohnlocked (E, 1,319 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Amused John, Needy Sherlock, Blowjobs) – A suspect flirts with John. Sherlock gets a bit jealous. Okay, a LOT jealous.

The Case of the Missing Blogger by nicknack22 (K, 2,147 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff, Humour, Friendship, Worried / Anxious Sherlock) – Alternately titled, The Case of the Oblivious Consulting Detective. In which Sherlock comes out of his mind palace to discover John missing. 221B does not fair well as a result.

Hell or High water by bluefire301175 (E, 2,250 w., 1 Ch. || PWP, Frottage, Alley Sex, First Person POV John, Case-ish Fic, Mutual Pining, Bed Sharing) – John wants. Sherlock wants. Plain and simple.

Display by 221b_hound (E, 2,377 w., 1 Ch. || Post-HLV, Tattoos, Public Hand Jobs, Exhibitionism, Possessive Sex, Possessive Sherlock, Possessive John) – A new client has been flirting with Sherlock and, finding no joy there, with John. John seems annoyed to be second-best, Sherlock thinks, so Sherlock decides to give the departing woman (and maybe also John) a demonstration of who, exactly, John belongs to. But there's more than one level of sexual jealousy and more than one display of possession going on here, outlined in the window of 221b Baker Street. Part 2 of Lock and Key

Surety by hudders (G, 2,477 w., 1 Ch. || Jealous Sherlock, Drunk John, Drunk Lestrade, Drinking, Alcohol) – Sherlock is pissed because it seems that four pints of larger, two shots of tequila and a glass of wine has resulted in Lestrade becoming a little bit too friendly with everyone. And by everyone, Sherlock really means John.

Pillow Talk by 221b_hound (E, 2,925 w., 1 Ch. || Post-HLV, Est. Rel., Preening Sherlock, Limpet Sherlock, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Sex on Furniture, Scent Kink, Masturbation, Fluff, Soft Sherlock) – John gets home late from work and Sherlock is nowhere to be seen. John walks through the flat, distracted by memories of all the excellent sex they've been having, and finally finds Sherlock asleep in the upstairs room - apparently having fallen asleep mid-wank while inhaling the scent of John's pillow. Well, you should always finish what you start, John thinks... Part 3 of Lock and Key

Reversed by whitchry9 (K+, 3,072 w., 6 Ch. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Medical Anomalies, John Gets Shot) – The man pointed his gun at John's chest, right at his heart, and shot.' Wherein John is shot, and Sherlock is the one panicking.

Overture by Kate_Lear (M, 4,435 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Angry John, Introspection, Dev. Rel., Embarrassed / Insecure Sherlock, Morning After, Bed Sharing, Cuddles / Limpet Sherlock) – A short snippet on how John and Sherlock might have got together.

All That I Have by the_arc5 (M, 3,721 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Canon Divergence, Pining Sherlock, John Whump, Anxious / Worried Sherlock, Light Angst) – In the aftermath of the Great Game, Sherlock finds himself with a new weakness. John is both the cause and the cure.

Paranoia by Ewebie (M, 3,789 w., 1 Ch. || Humour, Drinking Games, Scotland Yard Gang, Jealous / Possessive Sherlock, Inappropriate Questions, Embarrassed John, Matchmakers) – John and Sherlock join the gang of Scotland Yard for a night of drinking, and it gets a bit personal and revealing.

The Oolong Disaster by unicornpoe (T, 4,151 w., 1 Ch. || John’s Beard, Fluff, Humour, Frustrated Sherlock, John Takes Care of Sherlock, Case Fic-ish, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Possessive Sherlock) – John has a beard. Sherlock has a panic attack.

Obsession, Appassionato by shinychimera, Yeomanrand (E, 4,249 w., 1 Ch. || Possessive Sherlock, First Time, Jealous Sherlock, Music / Sherlock’s Violin, Present Tense, Frottage) – John is late, and he hasn’t called, and Sherlock works himself into a state. Part 1 of Love and Ysaye

Date Night by inevitably_johnlocked (G, 4,451 w., 1 Ch. || Anxious / Worried Sherlock, Caring John, Schmoopy Fluff, Fidget Cube, Baking / Cooking, Date Night, Established Relationship, POV Sherlock Holmes, Understanding John, Grumpy Sherlock, John’s Bum, Kisses, Hugs, Domestic Fluff, Touching, Hair Petting, Light Humour) – It's John and Sherlock's first Date Night as an official couple and Sherlock needs it to be PERFECT. Mrs Hudson helps. Part 7 of I-J's Tumblr Ficlet Collection

Butterfly, Pinned Under Glass by billiethepoet (E, 4,648 w., 1 Ch. || Possessive Sherlock, Jealousy, Barebacking, BAMF!John) – It started as a desire to keep John safe and whole, and ended up as just desire.

Applied Linguistics by what_alchemy (M, 4,837 w., 1 Ch. || Possessive / Anxious Sherlock, Introspection, Bed Sharing, Past John Whump, Est. Rel., Marriage Proposal, Sherlock Loves John So Much, Word Play) – “He wants to shake John by the shoulders, wants to open his mouth and swallow John whole. Wants to marry him.” Sherlock searches for the right words.

My First, My Only, and My Forever by vintagelilacs (E, 6,220 w., 1 Ch. || Post-ASiB, Virgin Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Sherlock’s Bum, John’s Scar, Sherlock POV, Body Worship, Fingering, Bottomlock, Promise of Forever / Proposals, Misunderstanding, First Kiss/Time, Loss of Virginity, Virginity Kink, Seduction) – Sherlock narrowed his eyes. He was missing a vital piece of data, he was sure. John had been looking at him oddly ever since they left Buckingham Palace, and the ensuing incident with Irene Adler had only exacerbated his erratic behaviour. What was it? Why would he care that Sherlock was a virgin? There was nothing reminiscent of mockery or pity in his gaze. And then it hit him. John Watson was aroused.

Fa Subito by kim47 (E, 6,659 w., 1 Ch. || Suit Porn, Cockblocker Mycroft, Obsessed Sherlock, PWP) – John wears a suit. Sherlock finds it extremely distracting.

Victim, Bait, Hero, Friend by KimberlyTheOwl (T, 7,887 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Epilogue, Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Past Kidnapping / Torture / Implied Rape, Panic Attacks, Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Lestrade is a Good Friend) – Some insights into why John was perfectly willing to throw everything away for a chance to kill Moriarty at the pool. Trauma, ugliness, and finally healing. Some nice supporting work by Lestrade as well.

A Friend Indeed by Sanru (K+, 8,190 w., 1 Ch. || Missing John, Friendship, Drama, Introspection, Possessive Sherlock, Worried Sherlock) – Something has gone terribly wrong with a supposedly simple case. John Watson is missing. While the search for him is proving to be fruitless, it has made Sherlock realize that having an emotional attachment to someone may have its disadvantages but he liked being able to call John his friend. Now if only he could find out what happened to him...

My Life for His by QuinnAnderson (E, 8,816 w., 1 Ch. || Guardian/Protector, Greek Mythology || Growing Up, Sex, Religious Themes, Suicide, Minor Character Death) – It began when Sherlock was eight, and he attempted to climb all the way up to the highest branch in the old willow tree in his back garden. He'd thought he was still small enough that it could support him, but the second he'd grabbed hold of it to pull himself up, the branch snapped, and down he went, plummeting a solid twenty metres. The odd thing was, he never actually hit the ground.

The Haunting of 221B Baker Street by earlgreytea68 (M, 10,388 w., 2 Ch. || Post TRF, Halloween / Ghosts, Pining Sherlock, Ghost Sherlock, Stroppy Sherlock, Sherlock POV, First Kiss/Time, Angry Sex, Ghost Sex, Love Confessions, Open / Ambiguous Ending) – In which Sherlock Holmes is a ghost.

A Is For Aftermath by ElvendorkInfinity (T, 10,567 w., 1 Ch. || Injury / Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship/Pre-Slash/Bromance/Platonics, Hallucinations, Introspection, Insecure / Worried John, Big Brother Mycroft, Alternating POV, Anxious Sherlock, Self-Deprecating, Mildly Possessive Sherlock, 3G Moment) – John is still hallucinating, Sherlock cannot sleep, and Lestrade has a new case for them. But will life at 221B ever be able to return to normal? Epilogue to M is for Moriarty.

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by "accident", it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

Pattern Behaviour by SilentAuror (E, 14,835 w., 1 Ch. || POV First Person Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Introspection, Stroppy Sherlock, Light Humour, Friendship, John Takes Care of Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Wall Kisses, Fluffy Angst, Happy Ending) – Sherlock doesn't even know why he resents John's dates so much. Until the day he does know. Slight angst, unrequited feelings (but don't let that scare you off!)

A Hooligans’ Game Played By Gentlemen by scullyseviltwin (E, 15,213 w., 1 Ch. || First Time, Rugby as Foreplay, Porn with Lots of Plot, John POV, Ogling, Body Appreciation, Cranky Sherlock, Slow Burn, Bed Sharing, Cuddling, Touching, Heavy Petting, Blow Job, Botttomlock) – In which John wants to get back in shape, does so, joins a rugby league and has sex with Sherlock Holmes. In that order.

The Burning of the Leaves by blueink3 (M, 15,915 w., 3 Ch. || Post S4, Angst, Reichenbach, Parentlock, Past Jolto, Idiot John, Sherlock’s a Mess, Puppies, Fluff, Possessive / Jealous Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Sherlock POV, Matchmaker Sholto, Melancholic Feelings, Emotional Sherlock, Domesticity, Love Confessions in the Rain, Kissing in the Rain, Pet Names) – After the events of series 4, Major Sholto invites John and Sherlock to lunch one day. It nearly proves to be too much for their tenuous relationship as the past haunts the present, putting the future that Sherlock so desperately wants at risk.

A Silver Sixpence by _doodle (NC-17, 16,400 w., 2 Ch. || LJ Fic || For a Case / Case Fic, Fake Relationship, Humour, Romance, Marriage Proposal, Awkward Idiots, Cuddling, Touching, Kissing, Love Confessions, Bed Sharing, Friends to Lovers, Fake Until It’s Not, Schmoop and Fluff, Bottomlock) – “John, we need to get married. It’s for a case, not any romantic notions on my part pertaining to our partnership,” Sherlock said, with brutal honesty, and without even looking up.

I Think I've Come A Long Long Way To Sit Before You Here Today by ArwenKenobi (T, 18,251 w., 3 Ch. || Grief/Mourning, Passage of Time, Major Character Death, Alternating POV, Sherlock Whump, Pining Sherlock, Hospitalization, Coma, Revenge Murders, Hallucinations, Love Confessions, Brutal Accident, Mystrade, Ghost John) – One year after John is killed Sherlock starts to wonder whether John has actually gone anywhere.

Division by MrsNoggin (E, 19,542 w., 11 Ch. || Coffee Shop AU || First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Barista Sherlock, Clingy Sherlock, POV John, John’s Limp, Bed Sharing, Fluff, Sleepy Cuddles, Sensuality, Touching, Virgin Sherlock, Insecure John) – John likes mysteries. And every morning he dips into the local independent coffee bar with his newspaper and ponders another... one Sherlock Holmes.

5 Times John Got the Girl (and lost her) and 1 Time John Got the Guy (and kept him) by LiviKate (M, 21,695 w., 6 Ch. || 5 and Ones, Kissing, Oblivious / Awkward Sherlock, BAMF / Sexy / Stud John, Embarrassed John, John’s Scar, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Sherlock) – John has always had good luck with the ladies. He's charming, friendly and funny, not to mention great in bed. However, his usual skill with the opposite sex is constantly being thwarted by Sherlock and his outbursts. How will John ever get a leg over when Sherlock is always cockblocking him?

How To Unfold a Heart by elwinglyre (E, 25,477 w., 7 Ch. || Post S4 Fix It, BAMF John, Mentioned Eurus, POV First Person Sherlock, Case Fic, Fluff, Slow Burn, Topping from the Bottom, 3 Yr Old Rosie, Introspection, Sexual Fantasies, John Worship, Ogling, Hand Holding, Kidnapping, Domesticity, Sherlock Whump, First Kiss/Time, Doctor John, Caring John, Soft Sherlock, Sensuality, Touching, Crying, Love Confessions, Anxious Sherlock, Rimming, Toplock, Fingering, Bossy Bottom John) – To Sherlock’s dismay, John’s return to Baker Street with Rosie is only temporary. Sherlock’s daily visits to Regent Park with John and Rosie illuminate his lost childhood memories and missed opportunities. But with each trip to the park, Sherlock also feels a growing sense of hope. That is until the past horrors return unexpectedly in a cryptic note folded in the shape of a heart. To decipher the message, Sherlock must uncover the nature of the hearts around him, including his own.

An Acquired Taste by kinklock (E, 31,059 w., 4 Ch. || Vampires AU || Vampire Sherlock, Misunderstandings, Bat!Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Humour, Magical Realism, Fluff and Angst, Blood Drinking, Holmes Family, Slow Burn) – At Montague Street when Sherlock was forced to sate his body’s needs, he was at least able to wander about the flat as much as he pleased. At Baker Street, it was mini-bags in a mini-fridge and bedroom confinement.

Lucifer's Gardens by ampersand_ch (E, 32,679 w., 12 Ch. || GERMAN VERSION || Romance, Friendship, Friends to Lovers, Murder, Poison / Drugging, Mystery, John Undercover, Academic Club, Therapy, Rituals, Jungian Archetypes, Doctors & Physicians, Grief/Mourning, Esotericism, Hospitals, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, John Falls In Love With Another Man, Jealous Sherlock, Crying, Doctor John, Hand Holding, First Kiss/Time, Mysticism, Hugging, Touching) – John goes undercover for an investigation as a favour to Lestrade in a village in Suffolk. The events surrounding the case awaken deep-seated fears in Sherlock. While John begins to come to a realisation of what he needs in Lucifer's Gardens, Sherlock tries to find a way to reach John – in more ways than one.

The Whore of Babylon Was a Perfectly Nice Girl by out_there (E, 32,897 w., 1 Ch. || Past Drug Use, Blowjobs, Toplock, Mentions of Switching, Rough Sex, Background Cases, Sherlock’s Past, Sherlock’s Sexual History, Experienced Sherlock, Past One Night Stands, Fingering, Cuddling, Possessive Sherlock, Paris Holiday, Bed Sharing, Naked Lie-Ins, Bathing Together, Confessions, Worried Sherlock, Laying in Bed All Day, Meddling Mycroft, Naked Lazy Day) – Sherlock walks into a room and takes all the space right out of it. He does the same inside John's head.

Turn Left at the Park by Glenmore (NR (E), 37,409 w., 28 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting / ASiP Divergence, Case Fic, Depression, Suicidal Ideation, Loneliness, No Mary, Possessive Sherlock, Fluff & Angst, Nightmares/PTSD, Sherlock Saves John, Sherlock Whump-ish, Doctor John) – So what would have happened if John hadn't walked through the park and met Stamford? What if, instead, he walked around the park and just went home?

Guidelines by WithLoweredVoices (M, 43,018 w., 15 Ch. || Winglock || Angels, Fantasy, Angst, BAMF! John, War, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Jealous John, Falling in Various Ways, Needy Sherlock, Wings) – The Good Soldier, one of the oldest and strongest of the fallen, is offered a bargain: to live as John Watson and to Guide a fledgling archangel so that he will stay on the path of good. Of course, Sherlock Holmes has different ideas about his destiny. Fantasy AU. Warnings for violence, occasional gore, and a whole load of hurt and angst.

A Goose Quill Dipped in Venom by Polyphony (M, 52,748 w., 16 Ch. || Celebrity John AU || Alternate First Meeting, TV Host John, Supermodel Mary, Character Death, Mystery, Romance, Case Fic, First Kiss/Time, Meddling Mycroft, Drug Abuse, Doctor John, PDA, Deductions, POV Sherlock, Toplock, Sexual Tension, Angry/Rough Sex, Hopeful Ending, Asperger’s Sherlock) – Sherlock Holmes, consulting detective, is called in to a very ordinary although brutal murder. Something is badly out of tune with the whole scenario and Sherlock finds himself becoming more and more obsessed with the crime - and also with the victim.

Never Change a Running System by Lorelei_Lee (E, 54,246 w., 18 Ch. || Pre-TRF, Romance, Humour, Drama, Sex Toys, Anal, Rimming, Masturbation, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Public Sex, First Kiss / Time, Virgin Sherlock / Loss of Virginity, Accidental Voyeurism, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Experiments, Naive Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Straight With an Exception John, Hand Jobs) – Sherlock discovers his sexuality – with far-reaching consequences for John.

The Thing Is by TSylvestris (E, 56,743 w., 21 Ch. || Case Fic, Dev. Rel., Anal/Oral, Blow Jobs, Meddling Mycroft, Drama, Romance, Humour, Casual Encounters, Pining Idiots, Possessive Sherlock, Orgasm Delay, Rough / Alley Sex, Public Sex, John Whump, Drugged John, Emotional Love Making, Awkward Relationship, Marriage of Convenience, Switchlock, BAMF John) – The problem with living with Sherlock, John thought, was that you never, never, ever knew the significance of anything. Like your flatmate's nose buried in your hair. Whilst you're in bed. Part 1 of Nitroglycerine

The Burning by SrebrnaFH (M, 60,658 w., 24 Ch. || Reverse Reichenbach, Suicide, Depression, Hurt Sherlock / John, Separation, BAMF John, Good Big Brother Mycroft, Angst, Implied/Referenced Torture, Fake Character Death, Rescue Mission, Reconciliation / Reunion, Hospitalization, Marriage Proposal, Illnesses, Physical Therapy, Happily Ever After) – Something went very, very wrong. John had seemed, if not happy, then reasonably content with his life. Sherlock had never predicted something like THIS might have happened. Not in his worst nightmares. He was the lousiest friend ever, apparently. At least Mycroft found him something to occupy his mind with, so that he didn't have to go back to 221B and stare at the walls and the chair, where John Watson would never sit again.

Being John Watson-ish by elwinglyre (E, 69,902 w., 17 Ch. || Bodysnatcher AU || Author John, Cranky Sherlock, Angst, Sexual Tension, First Kiss / Time, Falling in Love, BAMF John, Past Soldier John, Feelings, Inside Someone’s Brain, Shy Sherlock, Sherlock Loves John, POV Sherlock, Switchlock, Slow Burn, Internal Dialogue, Mental Turmoil) – When consulting detective Sherlock Holmes steps on one toe too many at a crime scene, he's consigned to a desk job in an archaic office on the seventh-and-a-half floor of the New Scotland Yard. It’s in this bleak office that Sherlock discovers a portal into the mind of renowned author John Watson. Grander than his mind palace, this new wonderland affords Sherlock new vistas of experimentation. To learn more about the mystery behind the portal, Sherlock seeks out and befriends Watson. But then it all goes wrong when others find the secret portal door—including the man whose brain he visits.

Just To Hold You Close by sussexbound (E, 70,841 w., 18 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting, Sherlock POV, ASD Sherlock, PTSD John, Demisexual Sherlock, Bisexual John, Cuddling/Snuggling, Platonic Cuddling, Enthusiastic Consent, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, First Kiss/Time, Sexual Tension, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Cuddle Negotiations, For a Case Until It Isn’t, Hair Petting, Sexual Negotiation, Anxiety, Trust Issues, Slow Burn, Panic Attacks, Frottage, Hand/Blow Jobs, Referenced Self Harm / Abuse / Suicidal Ideation, First Kiss/Time, Anal) – When a woman is murdered and the last person to see her alive is recently invalided army vet turned reluctant (and prickly) professional cuddler, John Watson, Sherlock Holmes is pulled into a world of intimacy and intrigue he never could have imagined. John is a conundrum and mystery: frank yet reserved, tender yet angry, open yet afraid. Sherlock is instantly drawn into his orbit, and begins to feel and desire things he never has before.

The Vapor Variant by 88thParallel (CanadaHolm) (M, 72,684 w., 18 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-THoB, John Whump, Protective Sherlock, Guilty Sherlock, Anxious/Worried Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, PTSD John, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Suspense, Virus, Sick Fic, Big Brother Mycroft) – They stood face to face in the middle of a clearing. The dim light of the moon barely allowed Sherlock to see the glassy terror in John’s eyes and the sweat that glistened off his forehead. His nose was bleeding again, blood dripping in a slow stream from his right nostril. They were both gasping for air, John’s eyes locked on Sherlock’s. There was no recognition there, just wild animal fear. Time stood still for an eternal few seconds, and Sherlock took a shaky breath. “John—”Spell broken, John spun and bolted back into the woods. Still heaving for air, Sherlock took off after him.

Northwest Passage by Kryptaria (E, 95,157 w., 27 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Canadian AU || BAMF!John, Canadian John, PTSD, Anal / Oral Sex, Rimming, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Drug Rehab, Falling in Love, Pining Sherlock, Love Confessions, Sherlock’s Violin, Panic Attacks, Switching, Anxious / Protective Sherlock, Hugs for Comfort, Suicide Mentions, Healing Each Other) – Seven years ago, Captain John Watson of the Canadian Forces Medical Service withdrew from society, seeking a simple, isolated life in the distant northern wilderness of Canada. Though he survives from one day to the next, he doesn't truly live until someone from his dark past calls in a favor and turns his world upside-down with the introduction of Sherlock Holmes." Part 1 of Tales from the Northwest

The Cost of a Wish by slashscribe (E, 102,493 w., 12 Ch. || xxxHolic Fusion || Spirits / Ghosts and Magic, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Soul Mates / Fated Lovers, Adventure, Immortal Sherlock, Powerful John, POV John, Frottage, Wish Granting, Angst with Happy Ending, Nightmares) – John has been plagued by a secret his entire life that has made him feel hopeless until he meets a mysterious, seemingly omniscient man named Sherlock Holmes who owns a wish-granting shop. Their meeting sets off a series of inevitable events that will change the course of both of their lives forever.

The Wedding Garments by cwb (E, 105,390 w., 36 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Alternate Future AU || Alternate First Meeting, Dating / Arranged Marriages, Romance, First Kiss/Time, Heavy Petting, Cuddles, POV Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn / Falling in Love / Dev. Rel., Nervous/Anxious Sherlock, Jealous/Cranky Sherlock, Hiking, Vacation Homes / Honeymoon, Sherlock’s Family, Horny John/Sherlock, Patient John, Massages, Hand Jobs, Assassination Plots, Oral Sex, Case Fic, Emotional Love Making, Bath Time Fun) – This is the story of a young consulting detective who wants nothing to do with marriage and an army doctor who wants to find true love. It's 2020 post-Brexit England and the British government is encouraging arranged marriages. Candidates meet through state-run agencies and date in hopes of finding love (and tax benefits). Sherlock doesn't need or want a spouse, at least not until John Watson shows up. Hesitant to give in to his more carnal urges because of the way they derail his mind, how will Sherlock progress toward the more intimate aspects of a relationship? The answer lies in a very special wedding gift.

The Bang and the Clatter by earlgreytea68 (M, 137,049 w., 37 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Baseball AU || Slow Burn / Dev. Rel., Possessive/Obsessive Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Body Appreciation, Depression, Closeted Sexuality, Family, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Ogling Each Other, Anxious Sherlock, Panic Attack, Drunkenness, Talk of Forever, Big Feelings™) – Sherlock Holmes is a pitcher and John Watson is a catcher. No, no, no, it's a baseball AU. Part 1 of Baseball

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

Against the Rest of the World by SilentAuror (E, 151,714 w., 20 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-TRF, Hiatus Fic, POV First Person Sherlock, Present Tense, First Kiss/Time, Big Brother Mycroft, Escaping from Capture, Soft Sherlock, Toplock, Insecurity, Infidelity, Travelling, Introspection, Pining Sherlock, Depression, Fantasies, Yearning for the Past, PTSD Sherlock, Suicidal Ideation) – Sherlock has been away from London for nine hundred and twelve days and counting, and has no idea what sort of reception to expect when he finally returns.

Gimme Shelter by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (E, 159,368 w., 21 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || 70′s Surfer AU || Period Typical Homophobia, Hawaii, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Professional Surfers, Gay John / Sherlock, Angst with Happy Ending, John was a Sailor, Misunderstandings) – All John Watson wants is the feeling of a freshly waxed surfboard under his feet and the hot California sun baking down onto his back. To finally go pro in the newly formed world of professional surfing and leave the dark memories of his past behind him as he rips across the face of a towering blue barrel. To lounge beside the beach bonfire every evening with an ice cold beer tucked into the cool sand beside him and listen to Pink Floyd and the Doors while the saltwater dries in his sun bleached hair. That's all he wants, that is, until the hot young phenom taking Oahu and the Hawaiian shores by storm steps up next to him in the sand in the second round of the 1976 International Surf Competition. (PUBLISHED AS ‘The Sea Ain’t Mine Alone’)

#steph replies #johnlock fic recs #my fic recs #obsessive sherlock #jealous sherlock #possessive sherlock #long post

117 notes · View notes

jamaiskookie · 4 years ago

Note

i would like more soundcloud rapper yoongi x idol y/n please it’s so cute

v-live alert! -myg

pairing: idol! y/n x soundcloud rapper! yoongi

wc; 2.9k

a/n: lots of you asked, and so you shall receive. ps, i wrote this really rushed but i kinda love it. lmk what you think, love you guys <3

[V LIVE] Surprise LIVE!

the v-live notification. or, more accurately, the sound of war. alternatively, you dance around your studio on a livestream and yoongi has a mental breakdown.

masterlist PREV

“i miss you too!“ you say, replying to one of the first comments that pop up on the live.

you probably should’ve showered before going live... and you probably should’ve changed out of sweats.

whatever.

it’s not like your fans haven’t seen this before.

half of your pre-debut pictures are just downright disgusting.

the number of viewers on the top of your phone begins to climb up to the thousands, increasing every half a second.

it always amazes you how many people show up to your lives. sometimes you wonder if your fans genuinely have nothing better to do. how do they always show up so fast?

the comments begin to flood with greetings and exclamations of ‘oh my god i’m so early!11!1’ and the multicoloured heart pop up on your screen, building up an impressive stream of likes.

“where am i?“ you read through the comments and look around, as if you forgot where you were. “in the studio.“ you grin when the comments flood with questions asking if dreamcloud is getting new music.

you can’t answer, of course, but it’s fun to see. you squint at your phone, which is propped on an elaborate setup that you spent the past twenty minutes preparing.

(three books on one eyeshadow palette and a selfie stick gingerly placed on a small stool)

((you pray to every deity out there that it won’t fall))

“i was just bored,“ you shrug, speaking to the screen. “so i decided to come on here and talk to you guys. how have you been?“ you ask.

hundreds of comments answer.

“i’m alright“

“i’m good!“

most of them contain some form of sappy declaration like ‘my day is much better now that you’re here!’ it makes you smile. how cute.

the v-live notification.

or, more accurately, the sound of war.

that cursed, terrible ding! haunts yoongi’s darkest and most terrifying nightmares. the sheer amount of panic that rushes through his veins when he hears that godforsaken noise, god.

the number of lives he’s missed- yoongi can’t even bear to think about it.

so maybe it was a blessing in disguise that yoongi put his phone on do not disturb so he didn’t have to hear that disgusting sound. instead, he found out the news via a gorilla’s screech.

“Y/N’S LIVE RIGHT NOW STARTED FOURTY SECONDS AGO HURRY UP YOONGI GET YOUR ASS UP AND STOP STUDYI-“ jimin yells from his room down the hall.

yoongi almost falls out of his chair scrambling to get to his phone. it’s not like he was really studying anyways- more like using his pencils to tap out a cool-sounding beat on his desk out of boredom.

watching your live > passing his music theory class.

priorities.

with shaky hands, he grabs at his phone, slumping onto the floor and he sees the familiar blue icon with the notification popped up on the screen.

[V LIVE] Surprise LIVE! Y/N: let’s chat <3

an unnatural squeak that slightly resembles the sound a mouse slips out of yoongi’s mouth.

even when he was a baby starrie and was glued to his phone at all times, he’s never been this early to a live. he unlocks his phone, cursing his momentary clumsiness. he clicks into the live, smiling when your beaming face blasts up on his screen.

you haven’t gone live in so long- it’s nice to see your face again.

“- how have you been?“

“good.“ yoongi types out in the comment box, mumbling the words as he’s typing. “way better now that you’re live.“ sometimes yoongi cringes at himself when he types these things. i mean, who could possibly guess that min yoongi, resident scary-emo-couldslapyouintheface bad boy socially un-responsible simped over a k-pop idol?

he can already see his reputation go down the drain.

he also wonders what it says about himself that he’s a 20-something college student who’s life practically revolves around you, an idol who’s just about a year younger than him.

but dreamcloud is a part of his identity now. he identifies as a starrie no matter what. you know how the old saying goes-

once you stan, you can’t unstan. or something like that, he’s honestly not sure.

you tuck your head onto your hand, diligently trying to keep up with all the comment. with a gasp, you nod at something. “oh, you’re right, user yoonalova98!” - that’s another thing special about you. whenever you read out comments, you also read out the username of whoever wrote it.

you explained in one interview- that it’s cooler to give credit and talk to your fans as if you’re just chatting as friend. saying the username feels like you’re saying their names.

what kind of lucky fan would get their comment read aloud by Y/N?

ugh.

yoongi blinks when he remembers that technically, he’s sort of part of this group of elite, recognised fans.

his twitter stan account got almost five thousand more followers after Y/N replied to his selca. the post itself has tons and tons of likes and retweets.

insane, that Y/N- Y/N herself- knows of his existence. Y/N- the love of his life, has seen his FACE. she commented three HEART emojis below a selfie that he took.

if he thinks about it too much, he’ll start feeling faint again.

“our anniversary is coming up soon! i can’t believe it’s been three years already. time does pass by when you’re having fun.“ you say. yoongi thinks that it’s rather ironic that you would forget your anniversary, when yoongi’s had a calendar countdown to January 14th since the beginning of september.

“ahh,“ you say, leaning in closer to the screen. “from user lialiarach, ‘did you watch jisoo unnie’s acting debut’ - i did! we all watched it and cheered her on during the premiere!“

jisoo’s new drama is good. it’s a fantasy-horror blend, and he, jimin, namjoon and jin finished all 16 episodes in two days when streaming hit Netflix.

your head tilts and you smile. “song recommendations?” you wonder aloud, and yoongi scrambles to get a pen and notepad out. you don’t do ‘y/n’s listening parties’ as much anymore, but your taste in music is impeccable and he collects all the songs in a playlist.

it’s called ‘wedding tunes’ (jimin named it, not him, yoongi swears)

everytime he tries to change it back, it somehow switches back to wedding tunes the next day.

it’s disturbing how good jimin is at this kind of stuff. hopefully yoongi won’t have to bail him out of jail one day.

“okay!“ you say, pulling your laptop open. you hum as you scroll through some page that yoongi can’t see- and he anxiously waits for the first song to be played with twitchy hands and a strong grip on his pen.

the first bar plays out and yoongi’s already in love.

“this is,“ you say over the music, double checking just to make sure. “don’t need your love by NCT...“ you squint. god knows there are too many NCT members. “dream! NCT dream featuring HRVY.“

“NCT dream...“ yoongi mumbles to himself, writing the song down on the notepad.

“you know,“ you say over the music, spinning in your chair and nodding to the beat. “i’ve only met the NCT guys a couple times at music shows and such but they’re all so nice. i can’t remember all their names, but i’m decently familiar with their faces. how do they even have 23 members? how does it all work??“

you dance around the studio, singing along nonsensical lyrics that don’t make sense but sort of fit the rhythm of the song (??)

“don’t need your loo-ooove-!!! dum dum duhhhh duhros noya!!!” yoongi stifles a laugh. there’s a reason why you constantly forget lyrics on stage.

which is quite ironic, actually, because half the time you’re forgetting the lyrics to a song you wrote yourself.

afterwards, you play all the hidden gems- and yoongi’s proud to say he’s familiar with quite a few of them.

airplane by j-hope (a youtube star turned successful rapper-vocalist-dancer)

sweet night by v (the internet’s resident eye-candy)

and then you continue to scroll through your laptop, biting your lip and murmuring quietly to yourself. you glance once back at your phone screen.

okay, listen.

yoongi knows that he’s delusional, okay?

but everytime you look straight in the screen it’s almost like you’re looking directly at the camera it’s almost like you’re staring into his soul. which makes zero sense, but it still makes his heart skip a beat.

let him dream, please

“what am i scrolling through?“ you say, reciting a question from the chat. “soundcloud, user chachachae.“

soundcloud?

oh.

that’s pretty cool.

he didn’t know you had a soundcloud account!

you usually post all your covers and random shorts to instagram or another one of your personal blogs.

for a moment, yoongi indulges himself by wondering if you’d ever listened to his music. his soundcloud account is linked in his twitter bio, after all...

but he shakes those thoughts away as fast as they came. he doesn’t need to entertain himself with such silly thoughts.

“ooh, this one’s good!“ you say, clicking onto something.

still with you by JAYKAY (pffftt haihdkahjd) starts playing and you lean back, humming along. yoongi knows this one too!! now he’s 3 for 3!! he and you do share a similar taste in music, so maybe it does make sense.

even though you’re actually main vocalist and lead dancer, you do listen to a lot of rap music. but the music you make is nothing like the old school hip hop tracks that yoongi is partial to.

the music you make- how can he explain it?

sweet like honey with a little bit of tang.

like barbecue honey!!!!

ok that was a bad analogy.

all of his favourite dreamcloud tracks are written by you- cloud nine, up in the sky, are u still here, quicksand- the list goes on and on and on.

it’s like listening to your voice solves anything he goes against. bad day? dreamcloud. something to celebrate? blast your debut song. in need of a party song? easy fix. he gets aux cord rights? (granted, this doesn’t happen very often, since seokjin insists that his music taste is superior to his friends.) but anyways, y/n can fix it.

listening to your voice feels comforting. it invokes something in him that he honestly cannot explain with words. you’re his inspiration. not just in music- but in life. he admires how you’re able to smile through anything, how you take responsibility for your own actions.

he admires your kind heart, which offers generosity and forgiveness to even the most underserving people.

he admires your passion, for music, for your members, for the smallest things. he admires how you’ll love everyone and anyone.

even though he’s never really met you, he feels like he knows you. he wishes he could, anyways. he wants to thank the person who’s gotten him through such bad days.

yoongi curses himself again for being so delusional.

he keeps telling himself that he can’t get so attached. then he’ll end up like one of those creepy fans who are convinced their idols actually like them.

blech.

“okay, next song!“ you exclaim cheerfully. “i really like this one, guys. he’s this soundcloud star. he makes really cool music.“ yoongi readies his pen. if this person really is a soundcloud star, then there’s a high chance yoongi knows of him. a smaller chance that he actually knows the guy personally; either online or from real life.

you press the space bar almost obnoxiously, like you’re about to reveal something grand. you look into the camera, and you lock eyes with yoongi- through that cursed, horrible screen.

the first note plays and yoongi thinks that it sounds... oddly familiar, actually. for a moment, he sighs in disappointment. this one doesn’t sound as great as the previous few songs. almost like it’s incomplete, imperfect. something about it bugs him at the very bottom of his gut.

jimin figures it out before he does.

“AHHHHHHHHH YOONGI!!! OH MY GOD-!!!! YOONGI ARE YOU SEEING THIS? YOONGI!! HYUNG!“ yoongi grumbles, wondering what the hell jimin is screeching about now.

“oh, for fuck’s sake,“ he mumbles. the difference between him and jimin is the way they express their emotions. while yoongi bottles it all up, choosing to deal with things alone and slump around, jimin has no other choice but to scream things out. it’s a wonder they’re such good friends, really. “what is it now?“ yoongi mutters to himself.

“yeah yeah, a gentle breeze- “ and then it hits him. all at once.

“holy fucking shit.“ he whispers to himself, slumping down on the floor. he can barely hear what you say next.

“this song is called people by agust d. he goes by the name suga on social media-!“ yoongi falls down, gasping for air. “i’m a fan,“ you remark casually. “mr. suga producer-nim!! i’m your fan! please continue to make good music!“ you chuckle. “what am i doing right now? he probably isn’t even watching.“ you stare innocently at the phone camera, as if you don’t even know that you’re changing someone’s life right now.

out of his peripheral vision, he can see jimin rushing into the room, crouching next to him and placing a hand on his back, murmuring something yoongi can’t hear through the sound of his sobs.

huh. when did he even start crying?

“he makes rap and really cool hip hop music. you guys should give him a listen. his lyrics are really meaningful, too.“ you nod along, reciting the lyrics word for word- even though you really can’t rap.

“what kind of person am I? am I a good person? or a bad person? many of ways to judge just a person. everyone will live on, everyone will love, everyone will fade away“ you headbang along to the beat.

yoongi slides down the wall inch by inch. he wonders if he’ll faint or vomit first.

other people seem to make fun of people like him- people who find solace in idols, in music. that’s partially why he doesn’t like disclosing the fact that he’s a diehard fan of an idol girl group.

but in hindsight, that’s so stupid. who gives two fucks about his interests? hell, yoongi’s been depressed half his life. and if a group of girls who sing songs and perform make him feel better, what’s so wrong with that?

jimin’s voice is a little clearer now, and so is yours. you’re singing along to the lyrics- the lyrics that he wrote. the lyrics that he spent hours agonising over, wondering whether his shortcomings and anxiety in his life were worth posting on the internet for his measly following to see.

wondering if the music he made had any impact at all, if one day he might see his dream come true, to see his music being played in public. wondering if anyone might hear his songs and think that it helped them get over a bad day. just like you have for him.

yoongi’s sobs wrack through his body, tears flowing freely on his face. he’s crying hard. ugly crying, like a baby throwing a temper tantrum. his cries echo through the room. if he could see himself right now...

well, he doesn’t want to think about it. he’s sure it’s not a pretty view.

jimin looks over him, smiling proudly. his eyes are glassy, and he tucks yoongi’s head in his chest, putting his arms around him and embracing him.

yoongi’s shoulders shake. if it was any other day, he would usher jimin out the room. he hates it when people see him being vulnerable. even his own family hasn’t seen him cry that much.

but right now, he can’t bring himself to do anything but cry. other people may ask why this is such a big deal, why someone emotionally constipated like min yoongi would cry like this for such a small matter.

this, he doesn’t know how to explain either.

all he can think about is how much it means to him. that someone he admires so much is now, in turn, saying his music- no, his life- is good. nothing much else. but just knowing that you’ve listened to his work, that you know of his alter ego’s name...

his crying sounds grow larger.

jimin pets at his hair. “shh,” he murmurs. “it’s okay.” jimin’s voice also grows a little shaky. he tears up, but continues to comfort the crying boy in his arms. “you did it, hyung. it’s okay. you made it. you did it. why are you crying? this is good news! this is so great! i’m proud of you, we’re all so proud of you.”

yoongi tries to speak; it doesn’t go very well. but when he tries again, he manages to choke something out.

“i did it.“ he says, before burying his face back into jimin’s hug. the two boys sit on the ground, crying together. an hour passes, then two.

slowly, yoongi drifts off to bed on the ground, the melody of his own song blended with sound of your voice echoing in his head.

my ordinary became your special, my special became your ordinary. so what? what if you just brush by? what if you get hurt? sometimes you might get hurt again, sometimes you might shed tears. so what? so what if you live like that?

~ people by agust d

tags; @jksbbyfacebunny @extremeobsessions101 @dwcljh @stonyiscanon @bishuthot @s0seo @cecedrake2217

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zaikaglow · 4 years ago

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Queens of The Court

Pairing: Hitch x Reader, mentions of Ymir x Reader, brief Eren x Reader

Synopsis: After the girl you almost dated Ymir starts dating Historia and breaks your heart you can’t get your head back in the game. A handsome boy from the baseball team offers to help you get your mind off of things, but maybe the actual solution has been under your nose the whole time.

Content: Oral (f giving and receiving, brief m giving f receiving). mention of m x f sex, but the only explicate content is between two women. Slight angst.

The ball you sent flying bounces on the other side of the tennis court and starts to roll into the adjourning court while Hitch goes running after it. “Hitch what the fuck you could have hit that if you payed attention for once in your life” you say frustrated. It was really starting to annoy you the way that Hitch would be so zoned out that she wouldn’t even notice that the ball had been served until it was far too late and she was swinging her racket at nothing. Pieck has her racket pinched between her knees as she focuses on re-tying her ponytail “Come on y/n calm down you and Ymir are the first string me and Hitch are just here as backup” at this laid back remark Ymir decides to pipe up, racket up on her shoulder she struts up to the net. “Well how do you expect me and y/n to be able to keep winning tournaments if we only get to practice with you two space cadets”. Hitch is finally back from retrieving the ball wines “come on were doing our best”! Pieck lets out a small chuckle “come on Hitch even I don't believe that”. “Whatever it’s 8 o’clock the courts closing soon and I need to go pick up Historia from practice lets go”

You and Ymir start to head back to the locker room together and you can’t help but to think back to the times before Historia. After doubles practice when Hitch and Pieck would go off to share a joint and leer at the baseball team from the bleacher you and Ymir would play each other 1 on 1, relishing the extra time together. At first it started off as a competition. Sure you two were the best doubles team but who was the best player? The first night you broke the barriers of physical contact was when you insisted that Ymir’s serve was out and her insisting it was in, until she had you backed against the chainlink “you know maybe if you put the same amount of energy you use arguing to work on improving your serves it might have actually have been in” you chided. “Shut up” Ymir responded, “why don't you make me” were your final words before her lips came crashing down on yours, her hands against your face. From then on it was your routine, after doubles play individually and always with a bet. Maybe the loser would go down on the winner, or maybe they’d be the one to wash down the winner in the locker room showers. You two never officially dated but you loved Ymir and thought of her as your girlfriend. That was until Historia. You remember how stupid you felt the day you had won your game against the opposing school and back in the locker room you had laced your fingers through her hair to pull her in for a kiss when she placed a hand on your shoulder to stop you “actually I started seeing someone. We’re still good as friends, we just can't keep doing the physical stuff okay”? God “the physical stuff” was that all this was to her? Your heart felt like it was being split in two and how could it not? You were in love with her and you thought she had felt the same, that the unspoken bond was what made it even more romantic. But turns out Ymir didn’t see things the same way, she thought you were just friends who happened to fuck. And now your plays were starting to suffer, too distracted by the heart ache. Sometimes getting distracted by the way Ymir’s hands grip the racket and your mind starting to wonder if she brushed her thumb along Historia’s cheek before kissing her the same way she used to do to you. Maybe that’s why you were so hard on Hitch for her spacing out, it's always easier to pick apart your flaws in other people instead of facing them yourself. As Ymir heads to the gym to go grab Historia from practice you decide to head over to the baseball field. Maybe hanging out with those two stoners would be better than going back home alone.

Pieck has the stupidest smile on her face when she passes you the joint, you taking it between your pointer and middle finger about to take a drag when you hear his grating voice “Heeeyyy y/n”. God it’s fucking Eren Jaeger, and he’s walking over baseball bat slung over his shoulders and you look away trying to avoid eye contact “Hello ladies, oh come on y/n don’t ignore me even in person” you take a drag of the joint before answering “hey Eren you ever think maybe there's a reason I never answered your text from 4 months ago” the boys eyebrows furl in concern “Oh come on you can’t still be mad about that group project! I said I was sorry and I was just asking you to dinner to apologize, you didn’t have to ignore me for 4 months”. Hitch doesn’t look like her cheery self, elbows on her knees and her fists supporting her pouting face “come on Eren you think you’d get the hint after 4 months, she’s. Not. interested.”. You pass the joint back to Pieck when suddenly you get an idea, still not daring to meet his teal eyes you say “Eren me and Ymir are playing tennis tomorrow why don’t you stop around 5 and pick me up”. Eren’s face lights up in excitement while Hitch and Pieck seem taken aback by you suddenly asking the guy you've blown off for the past 4 months to come hang out. Eren lets out a small chuckle “you two still practice on a Saturday”? “That’s why me and Ymir are so good, we apply ourselves. Hitch and Pieck could be too but they don't. Anyways are you coming or not” you say “Oh I’ll be there hot stuff, I’ll be there.” he says while strutting back off to the rest of the team in the dugout. “Hey I can apply myself” Hitch practically yells, you can't tell whether that remark was for you or for Eren.

Your game against Ymir is not going in your favor, you know you can play better than you are but she brought Historia with her to watch and it's too distracting. Staring at her and wondering what she has that you didn’t, why Ymir could fall in love with her but not you. It’s a big surprise but you’re actually relieved when Eren shows up so you can end the game. Once on the court Eren makes his way over to you wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close to him, Ymir who has her tennis bag in one hand, the other holding Historia’s looks over at the two of you eyes crinkling into a smile “hey I didn’t know you were with someone, I’m really happy for you y/n”! And with that she turns and starts to walk away like she didn’t just tear your heart apart with her smile. She was genuinely happy for you, there were no hints of jealousy, maybe she was just relieved that you found someone and that possibly your game would finally improve and stop being pissy about her being with someone. You grab your bag tighter and start making your way down to the locker room right out of Eren’s arm while he starts jogging after you “I’ll be out in a second I just need to change” you say fighting back the tears that were starting to prick at the corners of your eyes. Instead of actually getting changed you lay back against the cold lockers before sliding down to the ground and burying your head in your arms that rest on your knees when suddenly you hear “so were you fucking her or something”? Your head snaps up “Eren what the fuck are you doing in here. This is the women’s locker room". He just chuckles at you before offering you a hand “it's Saturday, no one else is in here drama queen”. You wipe at your eyes with the back of your hand now afraid he’ll notice your tears not that your upright “what does it matter Eren”. He places his hands against the lockers right next to your hips before leaning in and you feel his hot breath fan across your face and his nose brush your cheek “do you want me to help you forget her”? You feel his hand snake down under your skirt running up your thighs until he reaches the top band and tries to pull down but your clothes stay in place. “It’s a tennis skirt dumbass the shorts are attached” you side step your way under his arms out of his grasp before starting to head back out of the locker room “besides like I’d ever let you fuck me here at least take me back to your room or something”. Eren starts to jog to keep up “hey I know how tennis skirts work”!

Eren’s dorm was painfully college boy-esque. Air fresheners littered along windowsills and desk an attempt to hide the boy BO and by the dirty bong on the desk, weed. You sit down on the edge of the bed pushing away a dirty tee-shirt with your pinky when Eren takes a seat on the floor between your knees ``okay baby girl I’m gonna make you forget aallll about that little tennis partner of yours”. He places a wet kiss to the side of your knee before using the first two fingers on each hand to dip beneath the waistband of your skirt before pulling it down. You lay back in the bed as you feel him kiss your inside thigh before finally making contact with your core, and oh god what the hell is he doing? He’s spelling out the alphabet, you're not too terribly surprised “not shocked just disappointed” would sum it up. He’s hot so of course he probably has tons of girls who faked ecstasy just because they were so excited to have Jaeger between their legs. But after Ymir? No way this comes close, b, a, s, e, oh he finished the alphabet so he’s moving onto random words now “baseball”? Real creative dumbass. Bored as hell you can't help but to pull out your phone.

To: Sub 1

What are you doing rn?

Movie night with Pieck! You should come join us!!! : )

K, going to shower and then be up.

Eren pulls away surprised when you sit up and start to pull your skirt back up “hey babe, what's wrong”? He gives you those stupid puppy dog eyes. “You're bad at this i'm bored” you utter grabbing your tennis bag and heading back to the door. You’re halfway down the hall when you see him standing in the door frame hardon visible through his boxers when he says “come on y/n I'm better with my dick dont you even wanna see”.

After making it back to your dorm and taking a quick shower you head up to the next floor and give a knock on the door adorned with cute little construction paper cactuses labels “Pieck” and “Hitch”. Hitch opens the door with a big smile, her eyes crinkling at the corner. You can't help but notice the white tank top wearing she’s wearing is slightly see through and the way her nipples push against the fabric, and boy can you feel them too when she pulls you into a hug and her breast squish against you. Pieck is laying down on the bed blowing the smoke from a joint out a window fan they turned around so it blows out the window instead of in. She smirks when she sees the way your face goes blank at how Hitch is nuzzling her head against you “hey y/n want some”? You give a nob before heading over to the bed arm around Hitch guiding her back with you. A couple drags later and you're not even paying attention to the movie. Instead the weed has heightened your senses and it feels intense the way that Hitch is running her delicate little fingers up and down your arms. Pieck who’s been stealing glances at you two occasionally takes her phone out of her pajama shorts and says “oh hey I just got a text from Pock asking me to spend the night, I’m going to head over. You know how I like to sleep in, in the morning so y/n feel free to stay till wherever” she gives a wink as she saunters out the room. Hitch is semi laying back on the pillows and starts to giggle once Pieck is out the door. “What are you laughing about” you say as you sit up from the other end of the bed. Hitch’s face turns a bright red “nothing i'm not laughing about anything”. God you don’t know what it is about her right now but the way she short hair is kinda messy from rolling against the pillows or what a tease she looks like nipples poking through that see through tank top and her ass practically hanging out the bottom of those short shorts but you can’t help what comes over you. On your hands and knees you start to crawl towards her, green eyes widening as she watches you stalk towards her like a predator. Until you’re over her hands placed just under her armpits, your knees against the sides of her hips. You move one hand up to her jaw brushing your thumb over her lips “I said what are you laughing about ''. You don’t even give her a chance to answer before you crash your lips against hers, a small mewl escaping her lips at the contact. You move your hand from her face down to her side fingers running over her ribs. She sighs and leans into your touch, at her receptiveness you go ahead and move your hand up to her breast kneading the soft tissue between your fingers. When she starts to rub her thighs together you go ahead and practically rip that little tank top off her and latch your lips onto her nipple. One hand still gently squeezes her other breast thumb rubbing small circles around her perked up little nipple, on the other you have your tongue flicking, rolling, and sucking against her. Her hands go to your shoulders squeezing harder each time you pull off her nipple with a pop before going back. You plant a kiss to her sternum moving down her torso nipping at her belly button before continuing down and pulling her shorts off. She’s so beautiful. Her plump bottom lip between her teeth as her perky breast moving up and down with her excited breathing, her pubic hair is the same sandy blonde as her head and she’s practically glistening at her core. Spreading her legs apart you lay your head against her thigh and look into her eyes as you slide your pointer and ring finger inside of her. You can’t help but chuckle at just how wet she already is and how she’s clenching around your fingers, her hands gripping the sheets. You turn your head slightly as kiss her thigh as your drag your fingers in and out watching her face contorted in pleasure as she whimpers “use your words tell me what you want” she practically pants out “your tongue I want your tongue” and she's so sweet how can you not indulge her? You start to curl your fingers up as you give her puffy clit a kiss before starting to lap at it with the flat of your tongue. It’s driving you crazy the way her tits bounce with the thrust of your fingers and how she’s grinding her hips down against your fingers. Your other hand goes to play with her tits as you feel her flutter around you as she reaches her release, your tongue still spinning around her clit to ease her though the orgasm. “Mm too much” she mutters out pushing against your head. You sit back up admiring the fucked out look on pretty little Hitch all thanks to you. She sits up on her hands and knees giving you a soft smile “wanna make you feel good now” she says crawling into your lap, peppering kisses down your neck stopping to suck on your collar bone. You pull her head back “no hickies” you say bopping your pointer finger against her nose playfully. She giggles before ducking her head down to your waist pushing your PJ shirt up to access your nipples. She’s rougher than you were and you can feel her teeth nipping as she grabs you by your waist keeping you pulled close to her. When you give a little yelp when she uses a little too much teeth she pulls away giggling again as she pushes you down. “You know everytime you’d bend over for the ball” another giggle “I’d imagine what your pussy would look like”. You finish taking off the rest of your clothes for her and spread your legs when you reply with a teasing “so what do you think then?”. She licks her lips “even more beautiful than I could imagine” she says head moving down between your legs to lick up your folds before latching onto your clit. Hitch was an enthusiastic lover and you two went back and forth until it was late and you two were boarding on overstimulation. After laying down next to each other you get up and start to put your clothes back on. Hitch grabs your arm “hey, don't you wanna sleep over”. You just continue to put your clothes back on saying “ I don’t know if that's a good idea, I had fun though”. You get up and give her a kiss on the forehead before heading out and you can't bear to look her in the eyes because you can just feel the sadness radiating off of her.

Back in your own bed you hug your knees to your chest trying to get rid of the hole in the pit of your stomach. You did like Hitch, she was sweet and god was she good in bed but come on she’s not someone you can rely on. This is Hitch! Hitch who once missed a game because she slept in too late after a party, Hitch who sometimes just forgot about practice. There was a reason she was on your phone as “sub 1” . You were afraid of getting attached to someone like her. Especially after the number Ymir did on you. You needed someone who you knew would be there, someone who won’t let you down. Your heart couldn't take another break but also you couldn't help but feel guilty for not even giving her the chance. To take your mind off of things you decide to get up early to go practice against the backboard.

It's 7am on a Saturday and you think you’ll be alone so you’re surprised when you hear the familiar sound of the tennis ball bouncing against the back bored and your heart sinks. Who else would be here at 7am besides Ymir, but you're surprised when you turn the corner and see Hitch. She’s painting and sweaty so its obvious shes been here for a while, when she misses the ball and stops to pull another out from her shorts you say “Hey, I didn’t expect to see you here” she looks down and that pang of guilt comes back to your chest. She makes her way over to the fence where you are “Well you’re always talking about how I don’t apply myself and I thought that maybe if I tried harder in tennis you’d see something worthy in me” tears are starting to form in her eyes “I just imagined maybe you’d see me actually win a game or something. Not just see me still sucking against a wall”. You put your hands up to where her fingers were poking through the chain link and place your hands over her’s. “Hitch” she perks up to meet your eyes “do you want to go on like an actual date” her lips part in surprise at your words. “Also why don’t you see if Pieck’ll sleep over at Pocks again, this time I’ll stay the night”. She’s really beautiful when she smiles “yeah I’d like that”.

#hitch x reader #ymir x reader #eren x reader #aot x reader #aot modern au #aot fanfiction #hitch snk #hitch dreyse #ymir x christa #ymir x krista #ymir x historia

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gallavictorious · 3 years ago

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I was delighted to be tagged by Our Lady of Words and Joy @howlinchickhowl Cheers, dear!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Earlier today it was 40. Now it’s 39. WHAT GIVES? Did someone eat a story? Which one? I am so confused.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

137 098. At least that hasn’t changed...

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Highs, and Your Lows (i will weather them)

This Time (We'll Be Fine)

Teenage Tales

To Keep Your Gentle Heart

Captive Look

Huh. Would you look at that. All Gallavich stuff!

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Eh. Well. Listen, I always want and mean to respond to comments, because as a commenter I always love a response from the author, but I am procrastinator supreme so a lot of the time I just... don't. Not for a great long while at least. Then, two years AFTER you left a comment, you might get an e-mail notification about me responding. It's horrible, really, because I keep the comments in my heart and treasure them so much and the lovely people taking the time to leave a few words on my silly stories really do deserve better.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Life, Still to Come has the one main character Jim Moriarty killing himself and his lover Sebastian Moran after he's diagnosed with incurable brain cancer, so I guess that's pretty angsty? The tone of the fic, however, is... kinda soft and peaceful, really. It doesn't feel so very sad, I think.

For Gallavich, I've got Chapter 7 of my ficlet collection Highs, and Your Lows (i will weather them). It's an Wild West AU kind of deal, where Ian Gallagher is visited by the ghost of the young fiend Mickey Milkovich after his dad beats him to death. That one is sad, but there's the glimmer of a promise that they might meet again one day, in a better world.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

My fics mostly end on a happy note, and I have a hard time pinning down which is the happiest. Hm. I'm gonna say Pressure or possibly Foreign Country, if only because the happy endings there are offered in contrast to the otherwise angsty story and so seems all the happier for it.

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have, once. Well, started one, really. Notes Regarding the End of the World is a crossover between Sherlock BBC and Mark Lawrence's The Broken Empire trilogy. I still feel there's a bunch of potential there, but I'm very hesitant I'll ever finish it.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not to my recollection, no. Back when I posted my SW fic on the Jedi Council forums you might receive critical comments at times, but no hate.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not really, no. I'm not very interested in reading it, and so see very little point in writing it. There's been a few semi-explicit depictions of sexual acts – most notably in Claim – and I'm not averse to writing kink fic, even if they don't typically include actual sex when I do. For instance, I did The Ways We Bend and Break and Mend for X-Men, and the whole point was Charles first whipping Erik and then cuddling him – except in the end it turned into a character study with lots of emotions, and I think any attempts to write smut would be like that for me. Accidental character drama. XD

I might have a Gallavich thing for kinktober that is likely to be pretty explicit and kinda messed up. We'll see.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so. There have been a few instances of stuff popping up bearing a strong resemblance to things I've written, but there's also been times when I realize that things I have written bear a (very much unintentional) strong resemblance to other stuff that predates them, so I really think that's the nature of the beast. In any big fandom, the same ideas are likely to occur to multiple people, and we are all, often unconsciously, inspired by the same things and by each other.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah, to Chinese and Russian.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! Pathoftheranger and I co-wrote (How to Break the) Alibi Armistice, which was fun!

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I'm a creature of ever-changing affections, so I'm not so good with ”all-time favourite” and to be honest, I mostly tend to have favourite characters and ship them with everything in sight... Currently it's all about Gallavich but pretty much all ships including Jim Moriarty is forever gold to me (though MorMor is The Best. Or is it Sheriarty? Or maybe Mormorlock? Or Moriadlock? Or Johmlock – notice the 'm'?). Cherik's a big one too!

Ask me again in six months and my answer might well have changed!

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

The aforementioned Notes Regarding the End of the World. And I have this superlong Star Wars fic I started writing when I was 16 and wrote for years and years and then just... stopped writing, when I was maybe 20 pages from the end? It's currently at 180k words. This one I DO have some hope that I will go back and finish one day, although it's likely to be a jarring experience since I'm very much not 16 years old any more and my ideas about writing and the characters and everything have shifted quite a bit.

15. What are your writing strengths?

I do pretty well with the short format, I think. And with dialogue? Finding the voice of the characters (some more than others, certainly). Writing in my native Swedish, I think I'm pretty good at offering decent prose – I'd like to think I have a fairly developed ear for the flow of the text, and the melody of it? But when writing in English, that gets quite a bit harder. This really annoys me, because I'm rather preoccupied with the stylish elements of writing – though I've found that a lot of people seem happy enough to overlook clunky writing as long as they find the story otherwise engaging, which is a huge blessing for me. I believe I can build a decent plot, but since I can't write anyting longer than a few K these days there's no telling, is there?

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Primarily getting any writing done at all. Mostly, I stare at a blank page and despair and then I give up. This is why I no longer write long fic. I also tend to reuse favorite phrases or themes far too often. And there are so many subclauses... Proofreading happens to other people (I'd like it to happen to me too, but I'm terrible with it). I'm not good at accepting constructive criticism, even when I ask for it. I will often favour style over efficiency, and I'll stubbornly refuse to admit that this can be a problem.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

This question makes me feel like I ought to have developed thoughts on this, but I don't so much... I don't mind it? I've used it. Uh. It's a good idea to do a bit of research and not just rely on Google translate for it? If you don't like it, don't use it. Those are my thoughts.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Star Wars. <3

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Buffy/Angel/Spike. The Book of All Hours. Heroes. Maybe something based on The Coldfire Trilogy... ? Oh, and the Bible. I'm sure there are others.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

I really don't have one. There are a few I'm particularly happy with, but no one that truly stands out... That said, I was quite chuffed with how the first ficlet in Or Else Into the Light, my (tiny) collection of Anakin redemption one-shots, turned out. And Claim. I’m very pleased with Claim.

Tagging @dreamylyfe-x @fiona-fififi @pathoftheranger @abundanceofnots and @captainjowl

#tag games

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shinahbee · 4 years ago

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January Favorites 2021!

GREETINGS

------------------------------------------

February 06. 2021

Hello,

I actually wrote a lot for this month, perfect way to start off the new year! I have been catching up and watching some dramas and some of the new anime this season, which i’ll discuss a few down below. I’m just realizing that the manhwa recommendations list is growing very long and it reading those titles that i have discussed made me reminisce on some of them and most of which I would re read again. I tried to read some shoujo manga again and thought the stories were shit, so i don’t think i’ll ever go back. I’m thinking of starting some shoujo manhwa’s because I have a few titles that seemed like they might have an interesting plot line. I’ll list in in my favorites if I do end up reading those, but so far i’m still filtering the BL titles .lol.

I’m just going to put this out there now before you read the “Hell segment” I mentioned a few titles that were popular that i dropped and I listed the reasons why i dropped it, they are popular for a reason and if you like that and don’t take the plot line too seriously then that’s on you, but i don’t like the subject matter being glorified rather than “lesson learned” if you know what i’m saying so take my comments down there with a grain of salt...it’s just how i read it and interpreted the subject matter, it has nothing to do with the creator and their thoughts. This is going to apply to all of my reviews, they are just my opinions only so don't take what i say seriously if it you are offended that i happen to diss your favorite manga.

Anyways, i have no music recommendations this month all i have been listening to is podcasts, so listening to people talk about nothing.lol. That’s what my life has come to...

If you would like I can share a few that I have been listening to, let me know.

Alright, you all have a lot to read to i’ll just end here.

--------------------------------------------

MANHWA/MANGA/WEBTOONS

--------------------------------------------

Recap:

Whose baby is it? (ongoing)

Social temperature (ongoing)

Salad days (ongoing)

To be or not to be (ongoing)

Path to you (completed)

Here u are (completed)

BJ alex (completed)

No way, vampires don't exist (ongoing)

Unintentional love story (ongoing)

Karasugoka don’t be shy! (Completed)

Semantic Error (ongoing)

Tied up in Twins (Completed)

My Suha (ongoing)

Crash into me (Completed)

Dine with a vampire (ongoing)

So crash into you is now finished and you can now read the entire thing, so happy it ended really well and of course if you have seen my last favorites journal I made and entire post dedicated to this manhwa. The story is really heart breaking and definitely deals with more adult and mature content and it really is disturbing in some parts, so viewer discretion is advised.

That’s all i have to announce as an update, the rest is still ongoing. This month I came up with certain themes for my hell segment, last month I started with some manhwa that all had a common theme of Scum antagonists that you will run into when reading these manhwa, some of which ranges from mild inconvenience to this piece of shit should be set on fire. If you have not read that please check it out and watch me rant about stupid people.

This week featured another theme that you will run into reading shounen ai/ yaoi manhwa and manga, it’s a very universal theme of “threesomes”...I don’t get it, I don’t get why people think that’s okay to have three dicks in a room...i’m like there’s three dicks here, that’s way too many..lol. to each their own I guess, but i’ve selected three to talk about that also deals with mature themes and a bunch of people making poor decisions.

But before that, let’s talk about the normal shounen ai manhwa/manga that I have to recommend this month.

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Welcome to heaven

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1) Inner Beauty:

“Minjae’s been dumped. Fed up with their long distance relationship, his actress girlfriend Hye-Eun left him while he was “finding himself” in Australia. When Minjae rushes home and runs into Hye-Eun and her gorgeous new man, Woochan, at the airport, drama ensues. Amidst the chaos, the two love rivals bang heads. Upon waking, they discover they’ve changed bodies! Why have they switched? How will they cope? Will they ever be able to go back? Find out as Minjae and Woochan embark on a journey that takes “self-discovery” to a whole new level!”

Firstly this reminded me of the k-drama secret garden, if you have seen it you know that the main protagonists switched bodies at some point and with this manhwa, it happens in the first chapter. I liked how the relationship between the two boys started with minjae’s girlfriend leaving him for another man woochan, and after minjae and woochan switched bodies because he wanted to give the girlfriend a necklace as a gift , he switched bodies with woochan after bumping into him. They went to a shaman to seek out various ways to get back into their bodies while they find out things about each other that they were not aware of, in the end minjae and woochan were drawn to each other. The necklace is a tribal ornament that has a mysterious power to show a person’s past through their dreams. It seems that the reason why their bodies keep switching was because there was another necklace that was similar that was supposed to be it's partner; they go a try to search for the mysterious phenomenon surrounding the necklace that leads to their relationships with other people changing.

my favorite part of this story is that woochan and his father didn't get along very well because of a misunderstanding, while other parents didn't admit to their mistakes, woochan's father wanted to do so and repair his relationship with woochan, which made the story more compelling. Theres so many manga plot lines whee the parent is abusive and harsh and never did they think it was thier fault, but in this story woochan's father mans up to the things he did and how it affected woochan and i'm really happy about that.

Another thing I like about this story is the end where woochan who was an actor turned director made a film about his and minjae’s relationship because he wanted their story to be remembered and inspire other relationships that were similar to their own to overcome their hardships. This story has so much meaning and it’s something I would recommend to anyone who just likes a good story.

2) False Memories (lee gpiee):

” Wan’s got a face that scares everyone away before he can really become friends with anyone. So when Ha-woon befriends Wan on his first day at his new school, Wan is elated. Ha-woon must be an angel! It doesn’t take long, though, for Ha-woon to betray him in a terrible way, and Wan discovers Ha-woon might be more devil than angel. But then an accident happens that gives Wan a second chance at friendship with his angel. And it all starts with one big, fat lie.”

This one is really interesting, it is about a boy named wan and he was the new transfer student at a new school and how despite how he looks he wanted make friends this time around. Hawoon met wan when he was climbed off of a tree and fell on him, he immediately took a liking to him and befriended him, being very grateful to have finally met a friend he wanted to be a very likable person to hawoon, but then it was discovered that hawoon had many secrets and is not the kind person he is portrayed to be. There was an incident where one of his followers was spying on him and he wanted wan to essentially beat that person up in front of his other gang members. Obviously wan didn’t want that and this caused some strife between the two of them and wan began to be bullied by hawoon and his gang members. Later hawoon was trying to escape from his brother who went to his apartment to look for him and ran into wan who hides him over night, things tooka turn for the worse when hawoon thinks wan is being really nosy about his business and pushes him away and that is when the guy who hawoon wanted to beat up his him on the head and hawoon woke up with amnesia. Being the only person who had witnessed that, wan brought hawoon back to his place, when hawoon woke up with no previous memories of wan he lied to him claiming to be his best friend and the tow of them started to pursue this new friendship, of course things don’t last forever and the both of them discovered that hawoon in fact had many secrets that he preferred to keep under wraps especially about his family.

I know a lot of comments have said that it was stupid to lie to him about being friends but I understand that it was wan’s way to know the real hawoon. Hawoon’s personality was built by the lack of trust he has received from people and he was never able to open up to a person about anything. I really liked how the incident ended up saving their relationship in the end and they have a lot of cute moments together while going from being friends to being in love with each other. This is a very wholesome story and if you like that plot you will like this story, it really is not complicated.

3) Hand in Hand:

“While running a small pharmacy in the outskirts of the city, Sam meets a mysterious and out of place patient. This man named noah who was covered in bruises every time he had stopped by the pharmacy, Sam noticed that he seems to be in worse shape every time they meet and became curious as to why that might be, one day he saw noah getting into a shady van with a bunch of people and discovered that this town had a secret that kept everyone involved very secretive. Noah who was discovered to be a part of that society still goes and sees sam in order to be close to him, sam was then reeled into his world and became part of that society that was kept hidden.”

Sorry I had to write that summary on my own cause I could not find a good summary, so basically the pharmacy was inherited by Sam when his father passed away in this small town, there was no one to take over for him so Sam had to give up his dream of staying away from this town to moving back to take over the family business, There one night upon closing he meets a man covered in bruises while coming in to buy some alcohol and cigarettes, he treated him because it looked painful and was curious about him,

This curiosity escalated when he saw him get into a van with a bunch of ugly dudes, the pharmacy assistant said that there were gangs running around and it was best to avoid these people. Sam made the assumption that it was these men that were beating that man up and decided to pull him away from them. Noah then introduced himself to sam as they walk back to noahs apartment and he showed some interest in sam and asked what he wanted as payment for his treatment, Sam of course didn’t want anything which made noah surprised, but relayed to him that the offer still stands when he feel like telling him.

Not only being curious that noah shows up in front of him each time with more bruises but the fact that he may have discovered the town had a secret.

It was in fact an underground gambling scene that caused a lot of people to be very irritable, noah was involved in this and called it “work” as he had a debt to pay back to the person that took him in. Sam didn’t want to be involved but because of his interest in noah the two of them became romantically involved upon a few meetings and Sam started to develop feelings for him and likewise noah was in love with Sam. I’m not going to spoil the end because it was really intense, if you like mysterious plot points to your story this one will do the trick, it will keep you guessing as to what will happen next.

4) Stanning 101:

“Ji-Yul Park is an ordinary office worker who spends his spare time stanning a boy group, unlock and more specifically it’s leader, Jay.One day, he time travels back to his past where he encounters Juno, another idol and becomes his manager.What happenes when Juno develops feelings for Ji-Yul? Would Ji-Yul choose loyalty with Juno or his fanboy fantasy with Jay? And what is the purpose for Ji-Yul traveling back to the past-what is he supposed to repair or change?”

I’m not going to lie this title...don’t let it fool you, I thought this was going to be a satire on the whole K-pop fandom and just a story poking fun at k-pop fans...but boy was I fooled..LOL. This summary doesn’t even begin to describe how deep this story goes.

So as the summary says it’s about a fan named ji yul who is a stan of a group called “unlock” and his favorite member Jay was going to leave for military service and he was really bummed about not being able to see him for a while, so he went out drinking with his friends who share the same interest and cried his eyes out wishing that he could go back to the time when jay and his group first debuted.

And of course....that happened some how he was enabled into a time skip backwards to when the group first debuted. He first met up with a roommate that he was going to be sharing a room with, this was none other than juno a trainee a small company, Juno was a sensation later on in history and he was a rival of the unlock, and of course being a stand of jay he didn’t like the idea of being around juno. Upon meeting ji yul was already drunk and the next morning found juno and him had slept on the same bed, this made things between them awkward. But upon a series of events he became juno’s manager and inevitably began to understand the person juno is and how hard he worked, as well as his ties with jay. While trying to figure out what was the reason for the time skip he met another person who was sent back to the same time for a different reason his name was suho, and suho was here for another person named rose who was a in a different group. Rose is a sunbae of Juno’s and the two of them are acquainted, But there was something about Rose that was alluring and that made his “ sponsors” want to see him all the time, this lead to a lot of conflict within his group, saying that he’s the kind of person who would sleep around with anyone that has money.

Suho was a fan of rose and the reason he came back was because in his time he had found out that Rose had committed suicide, now....this is a topic that i feel very strongly about as you may know if you listen to k-pop news there are certain group members from famous groups that have committed suicide as of late, a lot of which was diagnosis of depression,

This story deals with not only suho having had gone through depression and suicide attempts but Rose who was going through that as well, Suho wanted to make sure rose stays alive, so when he was able to meet him he did all he can to be beside him and get him away from these sponsors that clearly only want one thing from him. This had made rose and suho close enough to develop romantic feelings towards each other, it gave rose the courage to confront the ceo from the company. In the end the company ceo was being a dick and tried to force rose to sleep with these people in order to get chances to be on screen and promote their group. One of their members knew from the start what rose had to go through and after rose was being hunted down by the ceo after disappearing, the member took footage from the ceo of all the nasty things he made rose do and gave it to Suho? I don’t remember this part well, but suho somehow go the usb footage and saw that rose had been sexually abused and assaulted by those men. Rose had went to see suho at the time and saw that he found the footage, at that moment he wanted to jump off the railings because he felt ashamed, but suho explained that it was rose’s music that saved him from doing the same thing he tried to do which was of course suicide.

Needless to say, at least in this story suho’s love for rose was able to keep him alive and as soon as suho w able to convey that he had disappeared and asked rose to find him in the future. I chose to write about Suho’s story because I just want to put it out there that suicide and depression are real struggles and to please seek help as soon as you can. Back to ji yul and juno, they in fact had developed feelings for each other and ji yul was sent back because he was in car accident with juno and in the both of them lost their memory of each other that was why ji yul only remembered Jay and being a fan of unlock while not remembering the times he shared with juno and how much he loved him. This made. He was able to tell juno after some time that he is in fact from the future and the both of them tried different ways to preserve the time that they had before ji yul would be sent back. Ji yul tried to defy fate but it turns out the accident happened to juno being in the car without having him there, meaning things will still take its course and you can cheat fate. So ji yul grabbed juno who was still unconscious and put him into the passenger’s seat and said his goodbyes to him, wishing for them to meet again even though knowing that it could be impossible for them to be together in the future he drove into the upcoming traffic. Ji yul woke up again back in the time he belonged the only thing he can remember was seeing juno’s picture in front of him and tears leaving his eyes.

Omg this is a k-drama all in one package, this is where i’ll stop because the manhwa is not finished, so if you liked my summary of it so far please read the actual thing, you will not be disappointed, I promise you.

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Welcome to hell

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I don’t know how to begin this segment after writing all of that for the heaven’s segment, those stories were just so good compared to the trash that i’m about to share here. But most of the trashiest stories have more complex plot points than normal stories. I mean you need to go through hell to come out the other side right?

*warning* this section talks about mature content! 18+ only, read at your own risk!

Let’s begin then.

1) Private lessons:

“Hajoon has been crushing on Eun-woo ever since they started college together, but he hasn’t had any opportunities to get close with him. At least they have a class together this semester: a lecture taught by the popular Professor Seo Joohyuk. Hours after the first class, Hajoon remembers he left his assignments in the classroom. Upon reaching the lecture hall, he becomes witness and accomplice to a series of private lessons Joo-hyuk is giving Eun-woo—lessons that unleash his own deepest, riskiest desires.”

I’m starting off strong ...oh where to begin? This story has so many messed up characters, I’d have to say all three of them are messed up. Firstly I don’t care if your professor looks like a dilf (urban dictionary if you don’t know what it means) you should never get involved with them. Lol. And I don’t know what school you people go to to have professors that look like this...all of mine were crusty old men who were mean and arrogant.

I makes me sick to think that there are some older men that would take advantage of people like the way Joohyuk did with Eunwoo and Hajoon. Hajoon just wanted to get Eunwoo’s attention, but because of joohyuk, he took “notice me senpai” to the next level. but I guess i understand from hajoon’s point of view that if he does nothing, he will never be change his relationship, so if he liked him then getting involve would be a way in. Eunwoo was so enthralled with joohyuk that he would just be a sex partner knowing that he would never have potential feelings for him in the end. I did feel sorry for him at first but then there was this part in the story where they were all preparing for this festival thing and he and hajoon were in a group and had to be waiters for the night of the festival, this was when eunwoo started to somewhat show interest in hajoon. Then that fricken dilf was like “you’re doing things on your own and i’m going to show you why you shouldn’t defy me...” or something like that, asserting dominance saying that eunwoo would always choose me over you to hajoon, and indeed on the night of the festival when he was supposed to work, shit went down between hajoon and this senior and fight broke out while hajoon was defending eunwoo , only later to find out that eunwoo was screwing the dilf in his office while all this was going on, I think i felt my veins snap...this idiot had the audacity to f around with that dilf while hajoon was working his ass off and even defended him. Smh....anyways in the end Eunwoo fell in love with hajoon and gave up on his feelings over joohyuk, knowing that joohyuk will always look at his other partner seojin. So in the end it worked out, but this whole story is a dumpster fire of trash.

So moral of this story is don’t get involved with dilfs, don't simp for them...lol. Just don’t do it. I don’t recommend this story for the content but if you are into trash and BDSM, then maybe this is the one for you.

2) Behind the scenes:

“Korea’s hunkiest top model Woo Taeyoung has decided to try his hand at acting once more. No more of those teen heartthrob roles, Taeyoung has his eyes set on a much more…mature role. And when he finds out his idol, the dreamy Koo Min-ki, is set to be one of the main actors of the film, he is even more determined to get the role as his co-star. The two seem to have a natural chemistry with each other…both on and off screen. Will this end up helping their performances? Or will it cause their worlds to come crashing down?”

This story is a also a dumpster fire of flaming garbage, it starts off with a model turned actor named taeyoung who works mainly as a model but is secretly a fan boy of another famous actor named minki and he went to his fan signing in disguise, only to be discovered by the fans and cause a racket and minki ended up injuring himself. This caused taeyoung to be able to meet minki in the most embarrassing way, but he wanted to make it up to him by helping him until his injury was recovered. One night minki was driven home by taeyoung and they ran into another popular actor named wonho...(monsta x..lol. i’m so kidding don't kill me...) and this dude saw minki coming out of taeyoung’s car and immediately became violent...

there it is red flag!

Turns out wonho was minks boyfriend, taeyoung only knew that his favorite actor minki was in a 10 year long relationship with his girlfriend, says the media, but he didn’t know that it was a man...and this violent piece of shit at that. Taeyoung had heard rumors of wonho being excessively violent to anyone who comes near minki and anyone who has worked with him always was threatened by wonho. So even though taeyoung reluctantly left minki with wonho he still was really worried, rightfully so.

Wonho is the worst kind of garbage out there; even being in a relationship he still forced minki into having sex with him. This is rape, even if you are in a relationship it means the same thing it’s non consensual and disgusting. Not only this but being violent to everyone that is near minki, is enough for anyone to end this relationship. But minki was that idiot who believed that the old wonho he once knew would come back one day and so this ongoing relationship abuse lasted for a long time. Taeyoung of course got an opportunity to make his acting debut, and auditioned for the of minki’s character’s lover, it was the first queer film in production so to the director it was a passion project that he wanted to see succeed. He passed the audition and showed his potential and chemistry with minki on screen very well, so the director was happy casting him in the role. But of course guess who finds out and showed up on the film set...wonho. He obviously made minki uncomfortable and also taeyoung, but in series of events taeyoung went to the bathroom and found wonho and minki making out inside and realized the person he admired was gay and was in a relationship with wonho for a long time. Later on he got to know minki more and found that he had romantic feelings towards him rather than just admiration. Because minki and wonho’s relationship was abusive minki was contemplating on ending it but didn’t have the courage to, it was taeyoung who showed genuine feelings for minki that was able to push minki to move forward. So while this was going on, wonho was in fact being sponsored by a certain person in order to get roles in his acting career, this person was taeyoung’s cousin...yeah i know messed up,. This dude is very toxic and made things go wrong between wonho and minki and that’s how their relationship went downhill for 10 years. Anyways to sum it all up a lot of stuff went down and wonho’s actions were no longer acceptable and as soon as minki found out this ongoing sexual relationship between wonho and taeyoung’s cousin, he broke it off with him finally and moved around different places for a while since wonho would not leave his apartment he couldn’t go back. Taeyoung and minki ended up dating each other now and he succeeded as a model turned actor with this role. Wonho after a series of events was able to let minki go after seeing him one last time and apologizing for everything he’s done to him. The movie was very successful and won many awards and the ending of the series just showed taeyoung and minki talking about their relationship on screen and off screen to the viewers...hence the title “behind the scenes”

Okay this trash made me angry and sad at the same time since it talked about a relationship that has gone bad and two people refusing to leave it since they have been together for a long time. You know when you should end things and if a person starts to change there is no way for them to be the same again. So all in all this story is really good for depicting all sorts of relationship issues and drama. I would say yes give this read because the story itself says a lot about the writer and how they think. This is one of those stories the pull you into the depths of hell and once you resurface your see things in a different perspective.

3) Turn off the camera:

“Yeon Jihoon is the leader of an idol group that’s hit a dead-end in their career. Now, he’s received a golden opportunity to save his group: a spot on the year’s most anticipated reality show, where he’ll spend two weeks living and filming with top stars Do Yoojin and Seon Yohan. The one threat to the show’s success? Yoojin and Yohan won’t stop having sex with each other. To stop a scandal from tanking the show and his career, Jihoon must keep his co-stars’ antics hidden from the cameras at all costs. Will Jihoon be able to keep these steamy shenanigans a secret for two weeks? And will he survive when both of his co-stars turn their attention on him?”

This is some straight up kinky garbage, like the description says, jihoon got the opportunity to promote his group by becoming a member in an upcoming reality show with two popular actors, the show is a reality show of the three of them living together doing daily activities while cameras are installed in their home. You can see where this is going right? When jihoon first arrived into the house to greet the other two actors; yoojin and yohan and he found the two of them in a room having doing sexual acts and even tried to cover for them when the camera crew arrived up stairs in the room.

After several attempts of the other two actors having sex at different points in time jihoon became very aware of the fact that they were doing this for the fun of not being able to get caught having sex on camera. So basically this was like a fun game to the two actors.

Yoojin and yohan were caught the third time by jihoon while having sex on the kitchen table and so the three of them had a discussion and jihoon made them sign an agreement not to touch him...of course that didn’t work and he was caught in unfortunate circumstances surrounding the both of them, to the point where both sex partners started to want to pursue jihoon for themselves.lol

This manhwa is just straight up kinky trash, it is meant to be a satire on three some relationships and not meant to be taken seriously, so just going by that, there’s not much point to the story, it’s not in depth it’s just interesting to watch jihoon reject these actors advances in order to save his virginity.lol. I feel like from the recent chapters jihoon maybe more interested in yoojin than yohan so i’m waiting to see if yohan even has a chance to be on jihoon’s radar.

This is still ongoing and it only has 20 chapters so far so i don’t have that much to say about it, this was just something really normal in terms of yaoi to read while I was reading some dark stories, the art is really nice too if that is of any interest to you.

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So there are a couple of series that are quite popular that I have left out because I have dropped then fairly early on. one series called “Hate or Love” which i started a while back then and didn’t like the whole plot of having an abusive sibling forcing another sibling into a sexual relationship... i’m like nope...

This manhwa should have just been called “ Domestic boyfriend” I would have avoided it all together, because I have read “Domestic girlfriend” it is essentially the theme, and a giant dumpster fire of flaming garbage.

The main reason i stopped it was because the other person that I was hoping the main guy would end up with didn’t end up as the “ winner” well from what the comments said anyways, cause i stopped fairly early on when i found out the guy i liked was not going to be the end game, that makes me sad cause from the early chapters that i have read, there was a lot of sexual tension between the two of them and I was hoping this author would not push abusive sibling relationship as the plot...but looks like she did ...and i don’t care for it and find it gross...but that’s my morals, even if they were not siblings by blood they grew up together as siblings...that’s still vastly inappropriate. I'm used to it since I grew up with Japanese anime and manga with incest themes, but it still bothers me.... Vampire knight...

Even if they were not even related, i still would not like that red haired dude regardless cause his character seems like a dick, and i don’t think he suffered enough consequences for his actions to make him a redeemable character in my opinion. And also...out of 7 billion people on this earth, you would rather be with your brother...smh.

Also if we are talking about using sibling relationships in a sexual way as a plot line, then how i interpret this manhwa is that it is focused on more of glorifying abuse and sexual relations between siblings rather than making the subject matter more serious, if you know what I mean. But to each their own if you just read it because it interests you then feel free to do so, i’m not interested and decided to just drop it early on.

The other one is called “ Yours to claim” another popular series but again I don’t like dark haired dude, I think he’s a dick and if it was me I’d choose the blonde guy, he seems like he would be a person that would treat me better. I just don’t understand the appeal of being treated like shit by people, if anyone treats you like that...please dump their ass! Because It’s not okay! Both of these have the “ other guy “ as the better option for a potential relationship but they always choose the other messed up abusive/ bad boy and i just don’t why...i just feel disappointed but literally not surprised since it’s an ongoing trope in any sort of romance based media.

But needless to say there is nothing for us as the audience to do but to read them, we don't make any calls on who the person ends up with and the plot lines that happen in the story, so that is that i guess.

I’m having a mental breakdown just thinking about these two series, i included then briefly cause they fall into this weeks’ theme of trash.

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MUSIC

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Nothing special to share in this department this month, mostly listening to podcasts .lol.

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K-DRAMAS/SHOWS

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The tale of nokdu:

I described this drama as the mulan reversal, if you know the story of mulan, she dresses up as a man and goes into the imperial army camp to fight in the war in place of her father, nokdu is an adopted child that was suddenly hunted down by a bunch of assassins one day and instead of fleeing with his father and older brother he decided to follow the assassin into the city since he was able to injure them in the leg. He followed the assassin into town and was almost able to catch them when he was suddenly arrested from a disturbance another young man in town has caused. Later he found out that the assassin was heading to a village that was out of sight and exclusively to women, in order for him to go in he would need to dress up as a woman, the opportunity arose when he helped a young woman escape from the village with her husband and she gave him her clothes in exchange for his to escape. He then infiltrates the village and now has to chase after the assassin and try to kill the mastermind behind the assault on his family. But what he discovers was more than what it seems. This is 16 episodes and is completed if you want to watch it; I recommend it since its really good.

True beauty:

Everyone and their mother is watching this web toon turned drama, I say this cause my sister who gave up watching any k-dramas watched this one and read it...this is something, she doesn’t like a lot of things so i decided to watch it after she told me it was good. I watched it and I didn’t like it mainly because the problems in here is very much a young adult type of problem, like having acne and having to deal with bullies at school, these are all problems you mainly deal with when younger so none of this drama is relatable so I didn’t enjoy it. If you like the high school romance drama setting you might like this, but I have watched so much more meaningful dramas, this doesn’t do it for me.

That’s all the dramas I have watched so far, I mainly have been listening to podcasts instead of watching anything, I find it hard to find an interesting drama to watch these days, I have been enjoying listening to people talk about nothing lol.

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ANIME

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Haikyuu:

Finished Haikyuu season 4 part 2, I left this for a while so that all the episodes were finished and every time I watch it i gives me the same feeling every time. This part focuses on a lot of characters that were not fully flushed out in the first few seasons, like tanaka and nishinoya and one of the bench players...i forgot his name. I really like their portrayal of hinata this season he really is the saving grace of karasuno, not because of his obscure skills in volleyball or incredible stamina but because he’s playing volleyball because he loves it and it is fun even if the stakes are high. I feel a lot of the players here this season were so stressed they forgot that the game is supposed to be fun, and he keeps reminding them that it is what it is and that they should live in the moment. I loved seeing that develop in his character because i feel like there was too much focused on kageyama for a while and I wanted to see more of hinata’s growth.

So I was pleased with season 4 and I can’t wait to see more, haikyuu is really one of those anime that people are widely talking about now and it really is well deserved.

Skate the infinity:

Another sports anime about skate boarding, the animation is really nice and art style is really beautiful. I know there are so many sports anime out there now but this one is really interesting, I like the relationship between the two main characters reki and langa, it reminds me of the friendship between riku and sora in Kingdom hearts, reki teaches langa how to skate board from scratch and langa being a previous snow boarder was able to race one of the best contenders in the underground skating rink and beat them in a match but of course he isn’t a genius so he wanted to learn everything from the ground up since he thought it was fun. Lol. I like seeing the progress so far in their skating journey, this anime is really wholesome.

Dr. Ramune mysterious disease specialist:

This is a very satire anime, It is really comedic and deals with a doctor treating weird diseases, like the first episode there was a girl with a disease that made her cry out condiments as tears. It's actually very interesting in terms of the types of diseases they treat in each episode and how he uses these magical items to do so, that is a really bad explanation for this show but please watch it .It’s interesting so far and I’ll write more as it finishes.

so as a finishing statement, I hope you all enjoyed the favorites for January, I have been able to catch up on a lot of things which is why I have so many things to talk about this month, I already have the next theme for the Hell segment planed out for next month, so I can't wait to share that, if you like the manhwa recommendations and my excessive ranting so far.

until then. please take care of yourself and your love ones ! lunar new years is coming up, have a great year and I hope 2021 will be a lot better please follow me on my social media listed below if you'd like

thanks!

sheena

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SOCIAL MEDIA

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Instagram: shinb_art

Tumblr: shinahbee

Deviantart: she-be.deviantart.com

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hanjoonhwi · 3 years ago

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any kdrama recs luna?

HI BELLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, so this might get long so it’s under a cut and it’s kinda vaguely ranked + a very informal short description!!!!!!! ALSO all k dramas are suuuuuuper long, like 1.5 hour long episodes and like ~16 episodes, but you can just watch it in half hour intervals, it doesn’t really affect anything!!!!!!!!!!!

Also I watched all of these on Netflix but here’s a site my friend rec’d, and here’s a post with more links of where you can watch!!! (I haven’t checked either of them out, but my friend is an avid watcher, so hers should work!!!)

You can also check for better worded plots here because I did a pretty terrible job of describing them whoops

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok-Joo: It’s just about college life, but it’s so!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A very cute couple, very cute friends, kinda slow moving, but SO SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Girlboss-malewife dynamic 😌. There’s no real plot, but the character dynamic makes it super fun and cute!!! It’s just about everyday hurdles and life as a woman in sports and stuff!!! It’s also very AsianTM (you’ll know what I mean when you watch it!!!)

It’s Okay to Not Be Okay: SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The characters are so so cool, it’s about a guy who’s resentful of having to take care of his brother (who I believe has Autism? From what I remember?) and he meets a girl who changes his life forever!!! The 3 of them soon become a family it’s so 🥺🥺🥺. Also hashtag girlboss-malewife dynamic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Also there’s an element of mystery in finding the girl’s mom, etc etc, just overall really fun vibes!!! It also dicusses some super heavy topics (especially considering how Asians are around those topics, like mental health) The first episode is a bit crazy but the show is almost NOTHING like the first episode, you should give it a chance!!! Tw for mental health, obviously, death and a bit of blood, but you can just skip those parts, it’s only for a few seconds!!!

Navillera: It’s about a grandad who’s like 70 and his life-long dream was to learn ballet and so he does despite the stigma (AsianTM). His instructor is a young boy, probably 20 something, who has no family and soon they become best friends. The boy also finds his place in the grandad’s family it’s so so so 🥺🥺

Start Up: Okay I mainly only watched this for the actor, but it has a super developed plot, about 5 people who come together to start a company, they also soon become almost family and also there’s slight romance but I’m not a big fan of that, but I love the plot!!! Super not-focussed-on-romance, it has a good standalone plot + SUPER funny + very AsianTM. It shows the ups and downs of starting a new business + difficulty with your family accepting you + difficulty in your relationships.

Law School: Okay so this show is gooooooooooooood. It has a super nice, solid plot. Based in a law school, a professor is murdered and the show revolves around trying to figure out who the murderer is, and fast. It’s designed in such a way that each episode is zoomed in on one particular character, telling you their backstory, a grudge they had with the victim, a shaky alibi and usually other instances when they’ve lied to the point where you start suspecting every single character. It really keeps you on your toes!!! Bonus: SUPER CUTE COUPLE, again hashtag girlboss-malewife dynamic!!! BUT, at about 3 episodes left it becomes a bit mehhh, but it definitely is worth watching till then!!! It’s really interesting, up until a certain point!!!

Strong Girl Bong-Soon: This is I think the same producer or something like that of Kim Bok-Joo, it’s about a girl who, for generations, has super strength running in her family, but only on the maternal side. But if they misuse the power, it’ll be gone forever. The main plot revolves around finding a murderer in the neighbourhood and the couple is super cute!!! Tw for gore, murder, blood, etc, but I just skipped the scenes. (Also there’s scenes revolving around these random men and also ones about the main character’s mom and her friends, but I skipped those, they were super boring, it didn’t really affect the plot!!).

Moment at Eighteen: So this is basically about a high school, and it takes 3 stereotypical characters (the quiet, new transfer, the topper, and the happy-go-lucky responsible girl) and basically shows their backstories and how they are not how they seem to be. The characters start out as enemies, but by the end they’re all best friends, but it shows the whole difficult path in getting there, all the ups and downs, it’s actually very realistically portrayed!!! Super super cute!!! (but a bit weird, tw for murder and death). Also the ending had me in tears...

Suspicious Partner: So this was about a girl who was falsely convicted of the murder of her ex-boyfriend and she’s trying to prove her innocence, etc etc. The character dynamic is super cute and funny!!! I didn’t ever finish it because I didn’t like the actors that much :/ But the character dynamic is super cute!!!

Hospital Playlist: Okay so my sister’s watching this right now, so I’m not a hundred percent sure how good this is, but it’s about a bunch of like young doctors who are best friends who form a band on the side, and again, the character dynamic seems super cute!!!

Vincenzo: Okay so tw for quite a bit of blood and gore, but it’s about an Italian mafia guy who’s a lawyer fighting crime with his partner, apparently it’s super cute, I haven’t watched it personally but my sister loved it and there’s quite a community on tumblr, so it ought to be good!!!

#I hope this helps!!!#asks #tomthenetherlands #drama rec #<- just for me to find it later if I have to?#although it's super sloppily written so idkkk #ALSO #if you do watch any of them feel free to come scream in my inbox!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#also it IS kinda vaguely ranked if you don't know where to start but you can also just read the plots and jump right in!!!

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calzona-ga · 4 years ago

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She might change her mind; she certainly has before. But midway through an interview, Ellen Pompeo casually drops the bomb that after more than 360 episodes, the upcoming 17th season of “Grey’s Anatomy” may be its last.

“We don’t know when the show is really ending yet,” Pompeo says, answering a question that was not at all about when the show might end. “But the truth is, this year could be it.”

Pompeo has played Meredith Grey — the superstar surgeon around whom “Grey’s Anatomy” revolves — since its start. The show, created by Shonda Rhimes, premiered on ABC on March 27, 2005, and became an immediate, noisy hit. Since then, for a remarkably long time in Hollywood years, the drama has been among the most popular series on TV, even as the landscape of television has changed seismically. At its Season 2 ratings height, the program drew an average audience of 20 million viewers. And all these years later — in a TV universe now divided by more than 500 scripted shows —“Grey’s” ranks as the No. 1 drama among 18- to 34- year-olds and No. 2 among adults 18 to 49. In delayed, multiplatform viewing, Season 16 averaged 15 million viewers.

Strikingly, technology is such that teenagers who were born when the show premiered, and later binged “Grey’s” on Netflix, watch new episodes live with their parents. The series has spawned two successful spinoffs for ABC, “Private Practice” (which ran from 2007 to 2013) and “Station 19” (which enters its fourth season this fall). “Grey’s Anatomy” has been licensed in more than 200 territories across the world, translated into more than 60 languages, and catapulted the careers of music artists — from Ingrid Michaelson and Snow Patrol to Tegan and Sara and the Fray — whose songs have played during key emotional sequences.

In its explosive initial success, “Grey’s Anatomy” was an insurgent force in popular culture. The Season 1 cast featured three Black actors — Chandra Wilson, James Pickens Jr. and Isaiah Washington — as doctors in positions of power at the Seattle hospital where the show is set, and Sandra Oh played the ambitious intern Cristina Yang, who would become Meredith’s best friend. For the women characters, the “Grey’s” approach to sex was defiant and joyful, starting in the pilot with Meredith’s one-night stand with Derek (Patrick Dempsey), who turned out to be one of her bosses at the hospital.

Rhimes presented these images to the world like they were no big deal, when in fact, nothing like “Grey’s” had ever been seen on network television. Krista Vernoff has been the “Grey’s Anatomy” showrunner since Season 14, as anointed by Rhimes, and was the head writer for the first seven seasons. She remembers the moment she realized how radical “Grey’s” was — a medical show driven entirely by its characters instead of their surgeries — as she watched an episode early in Season 1. “My whole body was covered in chills,” Vernoff recalls. “I was like, ‘Oh, we thought we were making a sweet little medical show — and we’re making a revolution.’”

Still, no one expected “Grey’s Anatomy” to become the longest-running primetime medical drama in TV history, outlasting “MASH” and “ER,” the previous record-holder. Since 2005, “Grey’s” has inspired countless women to become doctors, and along the way, its depiction of illness has even saved a few lives. The show has remained popular through three presidential administrations, the Great Recession, tectonic shifts in how people watch TV and two cultural reckonings — one feminist, one anti-racist — that demonstrate how ahead of its time “Grey’s Anatomy” has always been.

And they’re not done yet. When Season 17 premieres on Nov. 12, “Grey’s Anatomy” will tackle the subject of the coronavirus as experienced by the doctors at Grey Sloan Memorial, all while filming under strict COVID-19 protocols. The season is dedicated to frontline workers. And Pompeo, a producer on “Grey’s” — whose Meredith has removed a live bomb from a patient’s body, was in a plane crash, was widowed after Derek died in a car accident, was beaten nearly to death by a patient and, in a separate incident, actually did die briefly after a ferry accident — is intent on making the show top itself once again.

“I’m constantly fighting for the show as a whole to be as good as it can be. As a producer, I feel like I have permission to be able to do that,” Pompeo says. “I mean, this is the last year of my contract right now. I don’t know that this is the last year? But it could very well could be.”

Pompeo has been refreshingly transparent about her fight to become the highest-paid female actor on television, having detailed a few years ago how she negotiated a paycheck for more than $20 million a year. She clearly knows what she’s doing with these frank pronouncements as well.

As Pompeo laughs over the phone from her car, she says in a near shout: “There’s your sound bite! There’s your clickbait! ABC’s on the phone!”

The “Grey’s Anatomy” team — led by Rhimes and executive producer Betsy Beers — created the first season in a vacuum, because the show did not have an airdate. The 2004-05 season was a comeback year for ABC because “Desperate Housewives” and “Lost,” both of which debuted that fall, became phenomena — not only ratings successes but also watercooler events.

But at “Grey’s,” Rhimes was getting noted to death by network president Steve McPherson. According to Vernoff, McPherson — who resigned in 2010 under a cloud of sexual harassment allegations — stonewalled with “pushback every step of the way,” as ABC’s then- head of drama, Suzanne Patmore Gibbs, fought for the show. Vernoff was close with Patmore Gibbs, who died in 2018, and recalls her talking about her clashes with McPherson.

“He just didn’t get it; he didn’t like it,” Vernoff continues. “Honestly, I’m going to say, I don’t think he liked the ambitious women having sex unapologetically.”

Wilson, when she was cast as Miranda Bailey on “Grey’s,” was a New York theater actor (“Caroline, or Change”) relatively new to series television. But she was well aware of the network’s issues. “We took a creative break around the Christmas holiday, which to me meant ‘Oh, we’re out of a job.’”

Pompeo was frustrated: “Once we finally got an airdate, two weeks before that airdate they wanted to change the title of the show to ��Complications.’”

In an email to Variety, McPherson disputed these assertions, saying, “I made the original deal with Shonda. I developed ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ at the studio. I picked it up at ABC.” He praised Patmore Gibbs, and added, “As for defaming me again and again, I don’t know what to say other than it’s sad that anyone feels the need to spread lies about me.”

Yet there was so little faith in the show that the writers were asked to clear out their offices when they finished the season. But to Vernoff, who had clicked right away with Rhimes, the early episodes had “felt like a labor of love.”

And it was worth the battle. “We fought for the right for Meredith and Bailey to be whole human beings, with whole sex lives, and not a network TV idea of likable,” Vernoff says. “You might not have been likable, but now you’re iconic.”

As far as the medicine went, the cases were often ostentatious. “Every kind of crazy accident that had ever caused terrible harm to any human ever, that was our homework at night,” Vernoff says. It was up to Zoanne Clack, an emergency room doctor-turned-writer, to be a sounding board in the writers’ room. She began as the only doctor on staff during the first season, and is now an executive producer. “What was interesting was that the writers don’t have those boundaries because they don’t know the rules, so they would come up with all of these scenarios, and my immediate thought was like, ‘No way!’” Clack says. “Then I’d have to think about it and go, ‘But could it?’”

When the program finally premiered — on a Sunday night after “Desperate Housewives” — to massive ratings, it was a shock to the cast and crew, given that they had shot the first season under a cloud, Pompeo says, adding, “So the fact that the numbers were that huge the first time we aired was a big f–k-you to McPherson!”

With Season 2 now a given, everything changed, Vernoff says: “It was like a hurricane-force gale, and everyone was just trying to hold on.” They had made 13 episodes for Season 1, airing nine of them and holding the final four for Season 2 — Meredith finding out that Derek was actually married (to Addison, played by Kate Walsh) had felt like the perfect finale. But upon the writers’ return, Vernoff says, the feeling was “Holy s—. We have to make 22.”

The entire cast — mostly unknown actors like Katherine Heigl as the sunny Izzie Stevens, T.R. Knight as the chummy neurotic George O’Malley, and Justin Chambers as the troubled, secretly vulnerable Alex Karev — had become famous overnight. For Wilson, whose Bailey was the stern teacher the interns called “the Nazi,” it was a new experience. “Folks were scared to talk to me, like in the store or in the Target — people would just kind of leave me alone,” she says. “It was like, ‘What’s going on?’”

According to Vernoff, “Paparazzi were following the cast to work — it was wild.”

The mid- to late-2000s were the height of glossy gossip magazines such as Us Weekly (and its copycats), as well as the inception of TMZ and Perez Hilton as celebrity-hounding, news-breaking forces that fueled (and soiled) the fame-industrial complex. The cast of “Grey’s Anatomy” was firmly in the sights of these new, often toxic forces in media.

Pompeo says the cast was so talented that it “was all worth it” — but yes, the transition to stardom was hard for the group: “At the time, it was just a real combination of exhaustion and stress and drama. Actors competing with each other — and envious.”

Heigl, Knight and Isaiah Washington all went through press cycles that made the show seem scandal-prone. To rehash it all now seems pointless; you can look it up. Washington was fired in June 2007. Knight and Heigl asked to be written out of the show preemptively, in Seasons 5 and 6, respectively.

Vernoff and the other writers were watching the internal messes unfold. They had to deal with how the fallout affected the show’s plot, as when Washington was fired just as Burke, his character, was about to marry Cristina. “When word comes down that an actor is leaving the show, and what you’ve got scripted is a wedding …” Vernoff trails off, laughing.

“There was a lot of drama on-screen and drama off-screen, and young people navigating intense stardom for the first time in their lives,” she continues. “I think that a lot of those actors, if they could go back in time and talk to their younger selves, it would be a different thing. Everybody’s grown and changed and evolved — but it was an intense time.”

Pompeo doesn’t want to talk about what happened with individual actors from the show, because when she has in the past, “it doesn’t get received in the way in which I intend it to be.” But she does make a point about the way television is produced. “Nobody should be working 16 hours a day, 10 months a year — nobody,” she says. “And it’s just causing people to be exhausted, pissed, sad, depressed. It’s a really, really unhealthy model. And I hope post-COVID nobody ever goes back to 24 or 22 episodes a season.

“It’s why people get sick. It’s why people have breakdowns. It’s why actors fight! You want to get rid of a lot of bad behavior? Let people go home and sleep.”

Debbie Allen would eventually be Pompeo’s savior in that regard, but that was years away. Allen — an actor and a dancer — began her directing career when she was on the 1980s TV series “Fame” as a “natural progression” because, she says, “I was in charge of the musical numbers, and so many directors didn’t really know how to shoot them.” She went on to be a prolific director and producer, most notably overhauling NBC’s “A Different World” after a tumultuous first season. As a fan of “Grey’s Anatomy,” Allen wanted to work on the show, and in Season 6, she was hired to direct. To prepare for it, Allen shadowed Wilson, who had been tapped to direct by executive producer-director Rob Corn. (“He came to me and said, ‘You should direct,’” says Wilson, who has now helmed 21 episodes. “And I said, ‘OK.’ Because I didn’t know what else to say.”)

Directing that sixth-season episode led to Allen’s fruitful relationship with “Grey’s.” In Season 8, Rhimes wrote Allen into the show to play Catherine, a star surgeon, a love interest for Richard Webber (Pickens) and the mother of Jackson Avery (Jesse Williams). Ahead of Season 12 in 2015, Allen became the show’s EP/director. Her duties included hiring all of the directors, weighing in on scripts and casting, and, as Allen puts it, “minding that people feel good about themselves.” Several years before the revived #MeToo movement would lead to calls for systemic changes behind the camera in Hollywood, Allen set a goal of hiring 50% women directors. She also increased the number of Black men who directed “Grey’s” during her first season as executive producer, among them Denzel Washington. (When she sold him on it, she recounts, he said to her, “I’m going to say yes, Debbie Allen.”)

Pompeo and Allen are close. Allen began her new role the year after Dempsey left, “at a time when we were really broken,” Pompeo says. “And so much of our problems were perpetuated by bad male management. Debbie came in at a time when we really, really needed a breath of fresh air, and some new positive energy.”

Pompeo continues with a laugh: “Debbie really brought in a spirit to the show that we had never seen — we had never seen optimism! We had never seen celebration. We had never seen joy!”

According to Pompeo, Allen began advocating for her to have more humane hours — Fridays off (Pompeo: “And I was like, ‘What? What? Fridays off?’”) — and for the show to shoot 12-hour days maximum, and ideally no more than 10 hours (Pompeo: “And I was like, I love this woman.”).

Allen speaks affectionately about her bond with Pompeo. “Coming out of Boston, she’s so earthy and real in a way that you might not know,” Allen says. “There’s a sisterhood between us — I guess you would say it’s almost a Blackness that exists between us. And she’s part of our tribe.”

Allen has been a key member of the “Grey’s Anatomy” brain trust since Season 12, and two seasons later, Vernoff returned to run the show. She’d left at the end of Season 7, consulted on “Private Practice” for a few years, and then went to Showtime’s “Shameless” for five seasons. As her contract was set to expire, Rhimes asked Vernoff to lunch, and told her she wanted her to take over. “It felt like she was saying, ‘Hey, our kid needs you,’” Vernoff says.

Before accepting the offer, Vernoff had to catch up on the show. She had always written “Grey’s” as a romantic comedy, and what she saw on-screen during her binge was dark as hell — especially after Derek’s death. “If this show that you are currently making is the show that you want ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ to be,” she recalls telling Rhimes, “I am, in fact, not the right writer for it.” But Rhimes was insistent, saying it was time for a change after the mourning period for Derek.

Vanessa Delgado, who started as a production intern during the seventh season and has worked her way up to being lead editor and co-producer, says the show’s trajectory shifted when Vernoff came back — it was a return to the original, saucier tone of “Grey’s.” “We changed the music completely,” Delgado says. “The dialogue felt lighter and more fun, and wewere having fun again.”

That lightness will be difficult to maintain this year, of course, when, as Allen puts it, “COVID is No. 1 on the call sheet right now.”

Vernoff at first wondered whether “Grey’s” should ignore the coronavirus, thinking the audience comes to the show “for relief.” But the doctors in the writers’ room convinced her this wasn’t the time for escapism, saying to her, “This is the biggest medical story of our lifetime, and it is changing medicine permanently.”

When they’ve had doctors and nurses come speak with them this season, Vernoff says, “they were different human beings than the people we’ve been talking to every year. And I want to honor that, tonally. I just want to inspire people to take care of each other.”

Pompeo, who is not shy about offering criticism, sounds positively enthusiastic: “I’ll say the pilot episode to this season — girl, hold on.

“What nobody thinks we can continue to do, we have done. Hold on. That’s all we’re going to say about that!”

Pompeo has a few more months before she decides whether she wants to continue — and as Rhimes and ABC have made clear in recent years, the show will likely end when she leaves. “I don’t take the decision lightly,” Pompeo says. “We employ a lot of people, and we have a huge platform. And I’m very grateful for it.”

“You know, I’m just weighing out creatively what can we do,” she says. “I’m really, really, really excited about this season. It’s probably going to be one of our best seasons ever. And I know that sounds nuts to say, but it’s really true.”

Vernoff doesn’t worry about the creative well drying up. “We’ve blown past so many potential endings to ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ that I always assume it can go on forever,” she says.

And Wilson knows how important “Grey’s” is to its audience, in that the characters have essentially become people who “live in their house.” As one of only three actors who’ve been on “Grey’s” since the beginning — the other is James Pickens Jr. — Wilson is in it until the end: “In my mind, Bailey is there until the doors close, until the hospital burns down, until the last thing happens on ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’ That is her entire arc.”

Whenever the show does conclude, part of its legacy will be about the talent it launched into the world, beginning with Rhimes, who will soon release her first shows for Netflix, after her company, Shondaland, made a lucrative deal with the streamer in 2017.

But it will also be about the characters of “Grey’s Anatomy”— mostly women and people of color — who are trying to make the world a better place as they find friendship, love and community.

“The show, at its core, brings people together,” Pompeo says. “And the fact that people can come together and watch the show, and think about things they may not have ordinarily thought about, or see things normalized and humanized in a way that a lot of people really need to see — it helps you become a better human being. If this show has helped anybody become a better human being, then that’s the legacy I’d love to sit with.”

#grey's anatomy #Ellen Pompeo #chandra wilson #Debbie Allen #krista vernoff #season 17 #variety #news

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rumata-est · 5 years ago

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Michael Sheen talks about his first meeting with Neil Gaiman

I’ve made a script from David Tennant’s podcast

David: Tell me about Neil Gaiman then.

Michael: This is what brought us together. The new love story for the 21 c. When I went to drama school there was a guy called Harry Turner in my year. Within a first few weeks we’re doing something, I mean a drink or whatever, and he said to me “do you read comic books?” And I said “no”. I mean this was 1988-89.. so it was.. now I know that it was a period of time when big change, transformation going on through comic books. Rather then it being sort of just super heroes, Batman and Superman. There was this whole new era of generation of writers like Grant Morrison. And starting to address different kind of subjects through the comic book medium so it wasn’t superheroes, it was all kind of stuff going on. Really fascinating stuff, and I was totally unaware of this.

And so this guy Harry said to me “do you read them”? And I said “no”. And he went like: ok, here’s the Watchmen by Alan Moore, here’s Swamp Thing, here’s Hell Blazer, and here’s Sandman. And Sandman was Neil Gaiman’s kind of big series, sort of point his name on the map.

And I read all those, and I was just blown away by all of them. But particularly the Sandman stories cause he was sort drawing on mythology, fairy tales, folklore, and philosophy, and Shakespeare and all kinds of stuff were being kind of mixed up in the story. And I absolutely loved that. So I became a big fan of Neil, started reading everything by him, and then fairly shortly after that within six month or a year Good Omens the book came out which Neil wrote with Terry Pratchett. And so I got the book, cause I was obviously a big fan of Neil by this point, so I read it, loved it, then started reading Terry Pratchett’s stuff as well cause I didn’t know his stuff before then. And then spent years and years and years just, you know, being a huge fan of both of them. And then eventually, you know, I’ve done films like Underworld films, and doing Twilight films... and I think it was one of the Twilight films. There was a lot of veeery snooty interviews that happened, where people who considered themselves well above talking about things like Twilight: we’re having to interview, you know, me, and weirdly coming out it from the attitude of “clearly this is below you as well”. Weirdly thinking I’m gonna go: yeah, fine, Twilight... And I just used to go: you know what? Some one the greatest writing of the last 50 to 100 years is happened in science fiction, or fantasy. I mean like Philip K. Dick is one of my favorite writers of all time. In fact the production of Hamlet I did was mainly influenced by Philip K. Dick. And you know Ursula le Guin, Asimov... All this amazing people, and I talked about Neil as well, went off a bit of a rant... the interview came out, bubble. About six month later maybe: knock on the door, open the door - delivery of a big box. Interesting... Open the box - a card on the top of the box, I opened the card, it says

From one fan to another.

Neil Gaiman

And inside the box like first editions of Neil’s stuff, and all kinds of interesting things by Neil. And he just sent this stuff to me.

David: You’ve never met him.

Michael: Never met him. He’d read the interview, or someone’d let him know about this interview where I sang his praises, stood up for him and the people who are working within sort of genre... And he just got in touch.

We met up for the first time, I was in Los Angeles when he came to LA, and he said “I take you for a meal”. I was like “alright”. He said, “you wanna go somewhere posh or somewhere interesting”, and I said, “lets go somewhere interesting” he said “right I’m gonna take you to this restaurant which is called the Hump, and it’s at Santa Monica airport”. And its a sushi restaurant. I was like alright, ok. I had a mini at that time,we drive off to the Santa Monica airport and this restaurant was right on the tarmac. There was nobody else there, we got there quite early, and you watching the planes landing on Santa Monica airport. It was like extraordinary! And the chef comes out, Neil says “just bring whatever you want, chef’s choice”. I have never eaten sushi before, and we set this incredible meal when they keep bringing these, you know, dishes, and they say “this is blah blah blah, just use a little bit of soy sauce, whatever”, you know, “this is eel”... and this was one dish they brought to us they didn’t say what it was. It was like mystery dish. And yet it delicious. Few more people started coming at the restaurant at that time, I said “Neil, I can’t eat anymore, I have to stop now, this is great but” he went “ok we’ll ask for the bill in a minute”, and then the door opens, and some very official people come in. And it was the FEDs. And the FEDs and we knew cause there were jackets on that said part of the federal bureau or whatever, and about six of them coming. One goes behind the counter, two go into the kitchen, one goes to the back. With like guns on and stuff, and me and Neil were like “what on Earth is going on??” And then eventually one guy said: ladies and gentlemen if you haven’t ordered already, please leave; if you’re still eating your meal, please finish up, pay your bill, leave. And we were like “oh my god we’re poisoned?? is this some terrible thing in them?” So we sort of finished, paid our bill, and then all the kitchen staff walked abroad it, and the head chef was there, the guy who was bringing us dishes. He’s in tears, and he says to Neil “ I’m so sorry”, apologizes to Neil, and we leave. And we have no idea what happened.

David: But you’re assuming it’s a mystery dish.

Michael: Well, we’re assuming... it cant be poisonous, that terrible terrible thing! So the next day was the Oscars which is why Neil was in town, cause Coraline had been nominated for Oscar. Best documentary that year was one by The Cove... which was by a team of people who had come across dolphins being killed, I think. And turns out what was happening in this restaurant was they were having illegal endangered species flown in to the airport, and then being brought round the back of the restaurant into the kitchen. We had eaten whale. Endangered species whale. That was the mystery dish they didn’t say what it was. And the team behind The Cove were behind this thing, and they took them down that night we were there.

David: That’s extraordinary

Michael: for month me and Neil were like “have you heard anything - no I’ve not”, and then we heard it was something to do with a coven, eventually, we found out that they were all arrested, the restaurant was shut down, and... we had eaten whale that night.

David: That was your first meeting with Neil Gaiman.

Michael: That was my first meeting. And also in a drive home that night from that restaurant he said (and we were in my mini) “have you found the secret compartment” i said “what are you talking about?” Such a Neil Gaiman thing to say! Secret compartment. “Yeah, each of man has got a secret compartments” I said “I had no idea it’s secret”, and he pressed a little button, and a thing opened up. And it was a secret compartment in my own car that Neil Gaiman showed me.

David: Was there anything inside it?

Michael: Yeah, there was a little man and he jumped out and went hello! Erm, no, there was nothing in there. There was afterwards cause I started putting...

David: Sure, That’s a very Neil Gaiman story. All of that is such a Neil Gaiman story

Michael: That’s how it began, yeah.

#michael sheen #neil gaiman #ineffable husbands #good omens #aziraphale #crowley #david tennant #david tennant podcast #sandman #twilight #underworld #comics #comic books #endangered species

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mergist · 4 years ago

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My Interview with LM

Five years ago I interviewed Lawrence Miles over e-mail, but I didn’t publish it because I felt like I was being a bit too confrontational. There are a couple questions I asked that he didn’t answer, and a couple more he did but were just personal or directed to me specifically.

I’ve always felt this tension over preserving work from someone I find brilliant but knowing they don’t really want the attention - but I feel like it’s been long enough that I don’t have as much angst over it. So I’ve scraped out the bits that seem nasty now, and left you with the rest.

= What’s your middle name? (I was told to ask this.)

My full name is Lawrence Arch-Voluptuary Miles.

= Why a rabbit mask?

It's my totem. If you haven't read it, then I strongly recommend Bill Drummond's "45" (his memoir of a magic-realist life in pop music), or at least the first section. The rabbit-loa he describes is very real to me also, and has been following me for much of my life.

= Why name it the Beasthouse?

The flat where I live is in a building that used to be a Victorian mansion, built - I swear this is true - by a military man named Captain Scarlet. The first time a very small relative visited, she described the hallway looking like "the Beast house", i.e. the one from "Beauty and the". (Note that the hallway looks absolutely nothing like the Beast's house, but everything seems huge when you're four.)

= What did you study at university?

I never went to university.

= How does one go about starting a comedy club in London, anyway?

You make friends with comedians and ask what *they* think about it. In my case, I knew Danielle Ward through an abortive audio project: she'd recently given up running a comedy night of her own, so I could ask for advice.

= What’s your improvement on the Box of Pain trick?

My version lets the audience see all the way around it, which is impossible in the standard version (it's based on a perspective illusion).

= Any novel advice on writing?

No, just finish what you start. I'm f***ing useless at that and I hate myself for it.

= For that matter, any on editing?

Instinct will tell you just about everything you need to know.

= Do you still compose music?

*Sigh.* Not for some years, no. I just don't have the optimism.

= Why Twitter?

It gives me somewhere to put individual sentences I'm happy with. Also, cutting out pictures and giving them daft captions is what we always used to do in fanzines.

= What happened to Lolita’s kids?

See the following question.

= How do you create and keep track of your characters?

I *don't* keep track of them. I'm surprisingly awful at remembering my own material, especially given the amount of trivia I can recall about other people's. A lot of characters used to get created by my watching terrible dramas on television, then figuring out how I'd do them properly.

= Partizan Empire: how did you plan to create a film, and why didn’t it pan out?

My method of resource-gathering may not have been strictly speaking legal. These days, of course, Kickstarter exists and I'd have a lot less trouble.

= You’ve mentioned being present for the recording of True History and Adolescence. Why?

Always nice to schmooze with actors. Even if Julian Glover *did* call me a prick. And occasionally, very occasionally, the director will ask for your opinion.

= How? Are scriptwriters usually brought to the studios?

I believe so. Although I wasn't asked to the recording of the last True Histories, I suspect because I didn't get on with certain Magic Bullet employees.

= What’s one of the remaining seven things that aren’t quite good enough to be the Enemy?

Literally an infinite number of monkeys.

= What’s the Chinese astrology approach to writing?

I have no idea. You see what I mean about my memory. I know Philip K. Dick used the I Ching to decide the plot of "Tha Man in the High Castle", is that what I was talking about?

= Without definition by exclusion, what makes good fiction?

It's one of those few things I don't want to know the answer to. In the same way that a lot of comedians don't analyse their jokes, because then everything stops seeming funny.

= Did you ever work out why the Wormhole Water Wheel wouldn’t work?

I've been given three different explanations, and still don't trust any of them.

= How did you come to feel the ghost of a tower-block was possessing you? Did it have a personality, or goals? How did it influence This Town?

I've tried to explain this in words, but I've never managed it. I seem to remember that I came closest when Trina asked me about it, so you could try asking her what I said.

= If BBV hadn’t gone under, what was the rest of Protocols supposed to look like?

The series would've carried on with something like the True Histories, although Sutekh wouldn't have been in so many episodes. I had fifty volumes planned, and still stuck to the plan when I started writing the Osirian cycle, but the fact of it being a self-contained mini-series changed a lot. (Eliza wasn't meant to die, at least not that early. But she *had* to die in order for the climax of Volume Six to work.)

= What was the horror in There Are Worse Things Than Angels?

It was conceived as a horror novel, so it was all fairly grim. I seem to recall the opening scene being a ritual with a frozen chicken, like a necromantic version of the "Sledgehammer" video. Actually, given that it was set in the 1970s, a lot of the atmosphere would've been similar to "Dead Romance".

= Beyond Rumpole, Smiley, Pilgrim, Bagpuss, Buffy, Clangers, Norrell and Claudius, is there anything you like and/or would generally recommend to people?

Plain goat's-milk yoghurt? Oh, I think you missed "The Singing Detective" off the list.

= How many magazine articles have you written? Do you use pseudonyms?

No idea, but no.

= Have you written anything for radio other than that one comedy-historical skit?

I wrote a few sketches for that programme, whatever it was called. The abortive audio project mentioned earlier was a pilot for a radio sitcom, but it didn't end well.

= If information is dynamic, sensual, and ill-suited to language, how should it be communicated?

Bee dances.

= Is there any method that retains precision and immediacy? There’s a kind of romance to a world where people speak in paintings and dérive, but I don’t see how they’d ever measure anything.

There *is* no method, because sensual information is sensual information and can't be translated into any other medium, much as music can't be turned into words in anything other than the clumsiest imaginable way. But the tools we use to try to capture beauty - language being the most obvious - can in themselves be beautiful. I find that writing is at its best when it *means* something but isn't trying to *describe* something.

= Could you expand on the prospective season following The Book of the World?

Yes, in rather more detail than we have time for here. Also I have a complete Fiftieth Anniversary Special in my head which I bet is a massive improvement on the real one. The same goes for Star Wars Episode VII, because I waste an awful lot of my life imagining things that can never, ever be made.

= Why so many two-parters?

I liked the RTD approach to two-parters. Instead of writing a feature-length script and splitting it down the middle like everyone else did, Big Russell would write separate but interlinked stories, which I felt had a lot of potential for world-building. (The only classic-"Who" story to attempt something similar is "The Ark", which is the series at its most epic and ambitious even if the script's terrible.) Also, bearing in mind that I wrote the list while pretending to be a proper producer, two-parters help to reduce the budget. And "The Book of the World" would be a hugely expensive season opener, as even the script acknowledges.

= The cache hosting the Protocols scripts disintegrated this year, and my site’s one of the only two places with public copies left. Would you like them back?

No, but please do hold onto them just in case.

= In old interviews you’ve sketched brief summaries of Seconds, Valentine’s Day, Ends and the Requiem cycle; what were The Spectacular Afterlife of Bernice Summerfield and Beneath the Planet of the Spiders meant to be?

I have no idea what "Beneath the Planet of the Spiders" was, and if I didn't know better I'd think you just made it up. I know I wanted all the Faction Paradox audios to have a monster that was *something like* a "Doctor Who" monster, though, and I know I was planning to use Metebelis-style spiders: could that have been it? "Afterlife" never got further than a one-page proposal, so all I remember is that it was set decades after the other Bernice books, and that it featured her son Escape Summerfield (this was before Big Finish got hold of her bloodline, natch).

= After all of the different media you’ve worked in, and after all of the criticism you’ve lobbed at both, why do you place so much importance on television and the novel?

I genuinely believe that television is, or should be, the greatest of all media. I'm with Dennis Potter on that. Novels are important because they can do things that can't be done in any other form, which is obviously true of *any* medium, but in the case of novels I feel their very nature is being compromised by the existence of cinema. As others have pointed out before me, since the mid-twentieth century, books have increasingly pretended to be movies. This is why I had a tendency to write novels that would be almost unfilmable.

= Conversely, given your tolerance of the superficiality and noxious surrounding culture of print and TV, why do you have such a distaste for video games?

I could just say "the stench of masculinity", though that rather misses the point. I *like* video games in principle, but the things we now call video games aren't games, as such: they're crude attempts at interactive movies. As a result, they're badly-written and entirely reliant on cliches, which locks games and cinema into a terrible necrotic spiral. Games are shonky parodies of films; films reflect the popularity of gaming culture by becoming shonky parodies of themselves; new games copy the films that they helped to make worse.

= How is difference a tenable virtue? The sentiment that there’s nothing new under the Sun is clearly evil, but if you adjust your every action away from the preexisting and banal, or build a civilization where everyone must be as different as possible, aren't you eventually going to run out of new things?

I take it as a given that the development of new technology changes the nature of human thought. Therefore, as long as new technology develops, new thoughts and new forms of culture can emerge. And since I believe technology to be infinitely upgradeable, we can theoretically keep being different forever.

= As an ex-editor of the range, what were your criteria for publishable Faction Paradox stories? Roughly how high was the series’ submission-to-rejection ratio?

Nobody "submitted", really: I just approached writers whom I thought might be interested, or whom I knew had an idea that might work in the Faction range. So the submission-to-rejection ratio was one to zero. (I know a couple of people approached Lars with half-finished ideas for books, some of them quite good, but I don't think any of them ever sent a detailed proposal. The only "missing" novel was Simon Bucher-Jones' abortive "Breakspear Passage", which I believe got recycled after I stopped being editor.)

There is one untrue answer on this list. Two if you count the joke about the bee dances.

- LM.

#lawrence miles #faction paradox #doctor who expanded universe

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