#I’m gonna go to sleep now so I can avoid 12 existential crises at the same time

[quodekash]

well shit. 2024 made a grand entrance 21 minutes ago.

[mikazukikannagisjourney]

Spiritual Log October 27 2019 also New Moon in Scorpio Post

Subtitle: I wanna quit but my soul has other plans lol Also why it is important to clear one's self to help clear the mass collective energies

Hi everyone, the Scorpio New Moon is just a few hours away, and I hope everyone's able to set their intentions, wishes, stuff you wanna integrate or cast or manifest into your lives. If you have been feeling the strong, heavy vibes, well, that's partly because this is around the time that we need to become fully aware of who we really are, and releasing what prevents us from living the life we were meant to have in this 3d realm, thus the excess baggage feels in both the physical and the heavy feelings or emotions. Also we're around the shadow of a Mercury retrograde plus the intense Scorpio energies so, I pray we all survive. Mercury is gonna be stuck until around Dec 10 so... That's gonna be one, bumpy, tear-jerky ride. I gotta stocks some toilet rolls lolz but seriously, it is likely that more people will be feeling the effects of their shadows even more so, as always I suggest clearing stale energies, cleaning up your closets (like the real ones or whatever you're hiding inside). Mercury retrograde season may suck because everything, including your life just seems stuck in the mud, but also this is a wonderful time to introspect. Go within. Find the missing parts of your soul. I gave that one a go because my intuition has been nagging me lately, and I feel a bit tired but at the same time I wake up feeling refreshed, unlike before where even sleeping makes me tired lol.

I hope you guys won't get tired of me (or of anyone else) saying this same message. Especially those who have been clearing so much of the stale, low-vibrational and stuck energies in all of their subtle as well as physical bodies. This process can be very frustrating, extremely painful, it can even drive you insane. But the strong message that I have been getting from the Divine Realms has been this:

You are here to bridge the gap between the higher realms and the lower planes. To bring in the love from Source and transmute the energies that prevent that from happening. To clear off the spiritual debris inside of you, so that each time another person triggers you, you will have no reaction but rather gain understanding and give back love, thus preventing the cycle of pain and hurt from happening and decreasing the low vibrational energies that feed this kind of thinking, of believing, and of living.

Like for example, someone sends you an extreme hatred of some sort (oh glob, I hope you avoid it but in case it did, well, I hope this example helps). You have no idea why someone would do that. Your old 3D self would either get triggered strongly (aka return that same hatred to the sender, or send it to someone else, or just cry and let it dampen your spirits), or just forget about it, depending on whether you got affected by it or not. Until something similar triggers it again. It will most likely repeat until something happens and you start running out of options.

But!

Think of it this way:

Once you're living in a higher realm of consciousness and understanding (like 5D and above), not only will your ability to sense why the hatred was there in the first place get stronger, but also because you can see things from a higher consciousness, you can help heal and transmute this within yourself. Like an older person having an insight on why a younger person is troubled, a parent giving unconditional love to their child who has been acting annoying and rebellious lately, or even as a person who feels the reason why their friend has been out of sorts and yet doesn't continually nag them to change or return to their old selves because they knew that the other person must become stronger through an event.

I am just putting this out there because the fact that living an awakened life is like living in extremes (i.e. You either feel super high vibes and unconditional love from the univers or things just make you feel like you're in the deepest hellholes on earth). But after 3 years of my conscious awakening, despite the fact that so many awakened people and wayshowers and starseeds and lightworkers and gurus have been talking about the importance of clearing the self, the subconscious, the energies, basically one's entire being because by clearing the self you're supposedly help in clearing the entire collective too. But honestly, I haven't seen the spiritual community talk about how this works. So I always have felt bad and annoyed at this concept. It makes zero sense. Some of the questiins in my head consist of:

Why do I have to do the clearing?

Why am I even in this prison-like hell-hole of a planet? I wanna go home.

Great things aren't happening to me and I'm giving it my all, what the f*** universe, do you hate me that much? I am not allowed to even have a but of fun here? F*** you and all who aren't incarnated physically and feeling the extreme pain.

Or just simply the idea that when I am healed, others get healed too because we are all ONE. YEAH RIGHT. The last time I heard that kind of stuff was when EXO was still complete with 12 members.

Seriously, universe and Higher Self are you effing with me (also I am obviously fangirling here so you can let that shit slide, unless YOU know what I'm talking about. In that case, high five lol 👋).

But really, nobody said that spiritual awakening would be easy, and unfortunately maybe more than half the planet is already starting to awake and some of us wayshowers are still cleaning our own grime, living stuck in the mud and not moving anywhere, or just sunk in the deepest pits of depression and regret for even waking the heck up.

Right now I am angry at the universe for even keeping me alive despite the shitty life, the existential and desperate survival crises, and feeling cut off from the miracles that made me wanna spiritually awaken a lot more (and why I chose it in the first place). But a small part of me also knows this:

Dying is easy, living is a million times harder. And yet, what happens during the time you're alive is what makes life worth living.

I am honestly not in the best place to say that. I am still living in rock bottom but I am doing my best to live one day at a time. It sucks. But really, finding your soul tribe can help so much. Even a small cheering message from a friend can help you survive the day. And that is enough to get anybody going. Like walking a thousand miles through a long, dark road with nothing but a flashlight on. You walk that stretch step by step, bit by bit. Because you need to, and YOU HAVE TO. And that is the true path of the awakening process.

*Take a deep breath*

Gah, that felt heavy AF, I was just gonna post about how happy I was after going back to cross stitching but here I am lol. Still, I do hope that despite the content, any grammatical errors or typos, you find a sense of comfort somehow. This is not an easy path for us, and at the same time, everyone else will be walking this path too, long after we've moved on. We are all meant to awake to our true selves, all 7 billion of us here, but not everyone will be answering that call at the same time. Most will be ignoring it, a lot will answer and then hang up, and a fraction of us will answer, take a pen and paper and write the details down and process it later. Again, everyone will eventually do it, but at each one's own time.

I pray that you overcome all of the obstacles that have been preventing you from achieving your true greatness. And as always, may you find the healing you seek.

Forever with love and hugs from Source above, I remain your friend and Soul sibling,

三日月

Mikazuki

P.S. If you've reached this end after reading so much stuff, shoutout to you and your wonderful soul! 💗

P.S.S. I hope you guys don't mind me going off character aka going fangirl mode while talking about spiritual stuff. I am just that kind of person. Still sending you love though. 💖