#I was embarrassed to talk abt them at first but then I remembered this is my blog and I can do what I want.
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2129888 · 5 months ago
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i don't remember how i stumbled across this interview but i've never seen anyone mention it so i'm dropping it here <3 it's a little dated but still like super valuable and a decently in depth look at higuchi-sensei's previous works and how she works and thinks as a mangaka... personally i think it's the most i've ever learned from an interview of hers. super interesting stuff :0)
#oofuri#higuchi asa#yuku tokoro#yasashii watashi#kazoku no sorekara#tw: suicide mention#and maybe i did jump out of my chair at the yuku tokoro mention. but i'll never tell#i love how she says basically u can't truly know a character without getting to know their family as well. a story progresses best this way#that's why she draws everyone's parents and siblings so thoughtfully in her work#wow and also.#that line abt how - after yasashii watashi - she received a letter from a fan saying it'd helped dissuade them from taking their own life?#and i think she says: 'and I remember thinking that maybe I drew this work because I wanted this answer' (?????)#very much used a translation app but#i respect her so much#pls skim if you'd like#ok one more. the line at the very end ->#'when they [abe & mihashi] met they both had their complexes. but after spending 3yrs together theyll arrive at....?'#ok well. boyfriendhood. next question.#she's so embarrassed at how long oofuri is taking her wkjakdjkjsd queen lift ur head...#i think she says something like 'homosexuality alcoholism and physical disabilities are all subjects I wanted to depict but it might be -#misleading to say im attracted to them' abt yuku tokoro. which i think is epic bc i take it to mean like. she wants to#represent these themes w/o fetishizing them#but she drew yuku tokoro first AND THEN had to go looking 'around the world' for somewhere to publish it bc it wasn't 'commercial'#so she just wanted to write it...........her mind....................... ok my god i could talk abt this forever
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robonoba-zorbo · 10 months ago
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If there's one thing about me, it's that at some point during an obsession I'm gonna make a cringe oc x cannon ship. And there's a high probability it's poly in some way. Here are the doodles that happened because of that habit
Their name is Carmine (car-mine), they're a Zoan type power user, model: Cardinal, and a tailor. beyond that I'm not really sure
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bl00dh0rs3 · 1 year ago
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the way i have absolutely no business being the way i am
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#horse.txt#vent //#sort of. too high to be sad abt it im in anthropology mode and listening to music that makes me feel sexy so its fine yk#anyway i typed a whole bunch of other tags talking abt how and why i feel this way by going through a few of the events i can remember#from my childhood that Might explain why im so emotionally guarded and struggle to open up anymore.#bc i Wanted to say they all felt dumb and juvenile esp since ive actually like#made peace with most of the ppl who were involved with them#but the Anthropology mode was just tearing it all down as i typed it bc that Is just a ridiculous way to look at it no matter how you cut it#doesn't matter that nobody involved really Meant to deal that kind of harm and i dont need to hate or blame anyone in order to acknowledge#that it still just Happened. like thats a Memory already babe no do overs.#which is kind of just accidental therapy so sick. love that fir me genuinely!#but also yes theres the bitch part of me that still wants to discredit it bc acknowledging that it happened =/= Fixing My Issues#so im still at square one technically. ive just been pacing in circles on it for a while ig#EVEN WORSE that the Scale of my issues is so incredibly mundane compared to so many of the people i seem to meet.#sitting in bed crying abt not having friends for a few days in elementary school when other ppl have jojos bizarre adventure levels of Lore#i know im not technically invalid for feeling the way i do or anything but god. if it doesn't feel fucking Embarrassing to open up about😭#its impossible NOT to feel stupid and sensitive for having these first world ass problems. And letting them hold me back#bc ppl not liking me for any reason makes me sooooooooo fucking scared So fucking scared its not even funny 😝#at least. ppl in my Circles. im pretty ok about being assertive with randos#still some work to be done on it but its better than whatevers going on with my personal relationships rn#sincerely to my mutuals and loved ones who see this i swear to GOD i love you so so so fucking much and im so. im trying to figure out this#the stuff thats got me so distant and bad at keeping in touch. its a whole slew of feelings about how i see Myself--not yall#i double pinky promise cross my heart im extremely serious#thank you for being patient with me you mean more to me than im capable of putting into words right now#alright theres a shot of tears in the hollow of my collar bone time to wrap up this post#daily reminder that i love body hair. there's some honesty.#😎😎😎💪💪💪#the Quaritch under the cut is just to make me feel better bc i love him and i think hes so pretty. hes like a security blanket
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luxesiren · 1 year ago
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⸻ 𝐇𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐄𝐑!𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐈𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
cw :: mentions of violence, nsfw headcanons (MDNI)
a/n :: i saw this picture again the other day and i had to write something abt it cause jesus christ…look at him! (art creds: @/jpegjetty on twt)
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hockey player!armin who's been skating since he was young and started playing hockey in memory of his dad.
hockey player!armin who usually isn't into violent sports but loves hockey with a burning passion and it is extremely good at it
hockey player!armin who outsmarts his opponents in every game, making them mad but he never cared. he always bragged by smirking and skating past them sometimes winking just to spite them.
hockey player!armin who has many girls fawning over him just like his other teammates but is always surprised by the number of girls who actually like him
hockey player!armin who met you at one of his games and it was completely random but he saw you in the stands and was instantly attracted to you.
hockey player!armin was too nervous to say something to you even though eren had prompted him to say something stop pining over you. "dude, just talk to her." he would shake his head and sighed, "i can't.
hockey player!armin who almost fell to his knees when you finally talked to him.
hockey player!armin who you realized was a sweetheart out of the rink and just kept the cocky persona when he was playing cause it made him feel good.
hockey player!armin who takes you out every friday after his games even if he's tired, bringing you flowers and making sure you have a good time. going all out because he wanted to see you.
hockey player!armin lets you wear his backup jersey to all of his games now even though he hasn't asked you out yet but he loves seeing you with his name on your back.
hockey player!armin who points to you in the stands when he makes the shot because you're his good luck charm and even though all the other girls fawn over it, you know it's for you and you only.
hockey player!armin who finally asks you out on one of your dates and completely surprises you but of course, you said yes.
hockey player!armin who is usually the calm one out of everyone on the team and talks everyone out of fighting each other but gets into an altercation with another player on another team. you see the big group before it even happens standing on the bleachers to get a better look, the crowd gasping when everyone starts to move and a fight breaks out.
you move faster than expected, sitting in the front by the barricade watching eren pull armin off the other player. both of them still yelling at each other and armin trying to break out of eren's arms, but that unwavering cockiness was still there when he wiped the blood off his lips and skated towards the barricade shooting a smirk your way before sitting out for the rest of the game.
hockey player!armin loves kissing you, whatever chance he gets. sometimes you're in his lap and his hands are all over you, you can't help but to squirm in his hold.
hockey player!armin who took such good care of you when you guys had sex for the first time, taking his time prepping you and making sure you were satisfied. "right there, baby?" "does that feel good?" "can you cum for me?" "you look so pretty like this"
remember when i said hockey player!armin was a sweetheart? yeah not when he's frustrated or when he's lost a game, having never lost a game before, his first loss got to him and he took it out on you. you would never forget how rough he got, how filthy his words were as he fucked you into the mattress.
"min, min, 's too much. s-slow down!" you cried out but he just sped up, his hips smacking against your ass loud enough that it echoes in the room, "c'mon you can take it. you've taken it before like a good slut, haven't you?
hockey player!armin doesn't get jealous often but he notices how men look at you, he's usually embarrassed when he leaves marks visible on your neck but tonight he makes the exception. he wants to send a message to the guy who's always hitting on you, that way he won't hit on you again.
hockey player!armin who eats your pussy like a starved man, he's sloppy with the way spit over your cunt and slurps up your slick making your thighs shake but he loves when they're around his head trying not to close around his head but he doesn't care. "f-fuck, armin!" your hands carding through his hair and pulling him closer to your pussy.
grinding on his face but his hands grip your thighs even tighter, he relishes in the fact that he gets to see you like this and no one else will see you like this. it doesn't take him long to make you cum, overstimulating you when he licks up all your cum. "you taste good, baby."
hockey player!armin who says 'i love you' after months of being together and takes you back to his place to engrave it in your skin with every kiss and every word he whispers in your ear as he slowly thrusts into you, taking his time enjoying this part of his thoroughly planned evening making sure you feel all of his love, "i love you, baby." "i love you too, minnie."
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© 𝐥𝐮𝐱𝐞���𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐧 | all rights reserved to me, please don’t steal, copy, or repost to any other websites
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tac-the-unseen · 7 months ago
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I love all ur blog sm!! Can I ask abt something with the slashers (specially Thomas <3) with an foreigner!reader that don't quit speak english very well and normally forget words?
(Sorry if something is spelled wrong, English is not my native language lmao)
Absolutely, I can!
And because the request didn't specify, this fic will strictly be about speaking a foreign language.
Sorry if this is inaccurate! I'm a native English speaker and don't know many who aren't. Sorry in advance!!
Slashers x Foreigner!Reader
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Micheal Myers:
•This man will act like he doesn't care but in reality he's so intrigued. (It might be why you're still alive) 
•He’ll spend his time watching you practice your pronunciation and recognition patterns, like it's a movie.
•Is he a bit mean about it? Yes. Will he laugh? Probably.
•If you find yourself not knowing what certain words are and stumble around until you find the right word, You'd be surprised at how patient he is. 
•If you are very new to the English language he'll secretly get you flash cards and stash them into a place he knows you'll find them
•Despite everything, if you ask him for help, he will help. He might be mute but he can write and use TV to aid you.
Billy loomis & Stu macher:
•Stu is already romanticizing your language, but instead of using the actual name of your language, he calls it “Talking pretty to me”
•Billy asks if you want any text books or study equipment to help you on your English speaking journey 
•Both boys are a surprising help! Stuttering trying to articulate what you mean? They've already jumped in to, A) help save you some of the embarrassment, and B) give you time to think about what you're trying to say. 
•Someone making fun of you? They're either dead or a social outcast by the end of the week. 
•Are you struggling to remember a certain word? These boys are willing play charades until you figure it out. And they won't drop it either, Stu says ‘It’s bad to give up when you've already come so far.’ 
•Over all it's not so bad (Stu 100,000,000% uses Google translate to figure out how to say ‘i love you’ in your native language) 
Thomas Hewitt:
•When both of you met, he had never met an actual foreigner before.
•He knew people travel around and occasionally some valley girl would end up in their small town, But someone from a whole different part of the world?
•His interest in you spiked the moment he heard your accent 
•Thomas has so many questions but doesn't know how to ask you
•With him being mute and your struggles with English, It's not the easiest relationship. In the end both of you just end up pointing at things and making noises to get your point across. 
•Absolutely loves to listen to you speak in your native language, Even if he'll never understand it. 
•When he's first trying to court you, he leaves you slightly damaged flowers (he struggled to pick them) to communicate his affection. 
•even with a language barrier, he's gonna love you like no one ever could 
Bubba Sawyer:
•He had no idea people outside of America existed 
•When You fell into the palm of Texas and his brothers found you failing to remember the word for your favorite snack, They knew you would be an easy target.
•When they kidnapped you and brought you to the basement so Bubba could chop you up, he was fascinated by the way you desperately tried to beg him not to kill you. 
•It ended in a huge fight in the family, But he got everyone to let you live a bit longer.
•Sits Criss Cross applesauce while you speak for your life. You could babble about anything and he would listen intently. 
•He pulls out his alphabet soup machine and spends hours typing with you. (You help him finally get past the clown level)
Bo Sinclair:
•absolute meanie, stinky poopy head about it >:(
•will mock your stutters and say stuff like “Oh come ON! The word is Cat! C. A. T. CAT! What's so hard about that?” 
•If you speak your native language around him, He thinks you're insulting him or intentionally hiding something. 
•”If you could say it to my face in your language you can say it to my face again in mine!”
•The same sentiment is not shared when it involves bedroom fun
•Will eventually apologize, But that's going to take a while 
Vincent Sinclair:
•As another non-speaking fellow he takes his time to make sure you two can understand each other 
•He’ll mostly use body language and and little doodles to get his point across 
•Stuttering over a word? He doesn't care, he'll let you work it out without any judgment!
•Want his help? He has several books, Vincent will just pull out a book he knows as the word in it, flipped to the page, and point at the word. 
•Love listening to you talk, In English or not. He'll happily let you yap his ear off. 
Lester Sinclair:
•Poor boy was lovestruck when he first heard you talk!
•Full on heart eyes while you explain where you're from and how you ended up here 
•If you end up fumbling on a word he'll start shouting out potential words for what you're trying to say. 
•Example: “and then I had too…uh…um..” “Run? Pee? Eat? Were you hungry? Are you hungry right now?” 
•So helpful, I know
•But the guy is already googling restaurants based off your native cuisine. He's got the date set up. 
•”It's no biggie, I'm a native English speaker and I still can't get it right!” 
Billy Lenz:
•Billy 100% understands the struggle of finding the right word to say 
•He can't stop stuttering himself, so when you start stuttering you kind of reinforce us in his brain that you were meant to be together 
•He feels like he can bond with you over it, and even feel safer around you knowing that you also mess up 
•the thing is if you start stuttering, he'll start stuttering. If you can't get it by God he will.
•”W-we can't bo-oth be wrong.” 
Brahms Heelshire:
•this man will 100% try to learn your language as soon as he finds out you're a foreigner
•That man has a huge library, there's bound to be at least one book written in your mother tongue 
•He spends a lot of time practicing your native language so he can speak to you more comfortably
•You already know he has children's learning books he'll pull out if you ask. 
•Can't find the word you're looking for? He's already 10 books deep, he'll find it for you. 
•Brahms is a well-educated man and he intends to use His years of learning to help 
•If you want to take classes to better your English skills he will 100,000% throw money your way to do so.
Hannibal Lecter:
•Now Hannibal really understands 
•He's a Lithuanian who learned English as a 10 year old
•He didn't struggle as much, But for the first couple of months you bet he was stumbling. 
•If you're struggling with a word, He has a process of teaching you so you don't forget it again. 
1) Identify what you're trying to say 
2)Slowly begin to sound out the word 
3)Have you recite the word a few times 
4)He'll either teaches you a little tune to remember or he'll do something so you remember the moment 
•Does it feel a little condescending? Yes. But it works 
•He's also willing to pour an ungodly amount of money into your English education if you ask 
•He'll even teach you himself in his spare time
Will Graham:
•Doesn't really know what to do, He's a bit awkward about it 
•He'll also identify the word and repeat it a few times so you can get a better handle on it.
•He thinks it's a bit funny and a bit cute when you stutter or mispronounce something 
•He will gently correct you and move on like nothing happened 
The Lost Boys:
•holy fucking shit this is a cluster fuck, let's do this one by one 
•David
-David, having been around a while, has picked up a couple languages.
-If he does know the language you're speaking he'll speak it back to you and guide you into English better than the other boys could 
-If not, he'll just read your mind and tell you what you're trying to say. It's by far the easiest way to articulate what you mean. 
•Dwayne
-Dwayne being just slightly younger than David has also picked up a couple languages 
-It's really the same if he does know your language But with a little more verbal teaching 
-If he doesn't he'll patiently wait until you figure out what you're trying to say. 
•Paul
-as soon as you start to stutter over yourself Paul starts shotgunning words off 
-some slightly related to the situation and others wildly out there 
-”Drink? Food? Ocean? Horse? The unforgiving eyes of God and His kingdom???” 
-he'll do this to confuse you and have a nice laugh 
•Marko
-Marko speaks English and Italian, so if your language isn't one of those two you're kind of shit out of luck 
-”Come on babe, you'll get it” 
-He finds it a bit funny but still tries to help in little ways 
Thanks for reading <3
Sorry if this seems hastily written together, I haven't had the request in a while so I kind of jumped at the opportunity.
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chokchokk · 1 year ago
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Can I request a San x Female Reader where It's her first time having sex and first time having an orgasmn. So San makes her squirt over and over before fuckin her. But at the end she notices blood and freaks out so he comforts her? Very smutty and fluffy please?
-AA
Im too embarrassed
dearest AA, “very smutty”, “very fluffy” and “too embarrassed” don’t co-exist in my universe, so i hope with this fic i could get some of your shame (?) away, babes <33 indulge in your desires and don’t hesitate to revisit me anytime !!! thank you for being my first requester xoxo
ʟᴇᴛ ɪᴛ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛʀᴜᴇ! | choi san x fem!reader
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“Don't go around calling me baby right now, or I'll turn like the San in your dream.”
𝚜𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚙𝚜𝚒𝚜 : Your boyfriend is a wet dream, but this only goes so far, when your real dream leaves you confused and most importantly, curious. San is more than happy to help.
“How does an orgasm feel like, Sannie?”
𝚐𝚎𝚗𝚛𝚎 : fluff (slice of life-ish), smut
𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝 : 10k
𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 : 1st time, sex with communication, first orgasm, foreplay, explicit consent, fingering, squirting, protected (!) penetrative sex, bleeding, after-care; san is a great boyfriend, san has a big dick, that is actually important to the plot, established relationship, living together, a lot of sweet pet-names, teasing, domestic humour
𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚛'𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎 : LMAO i’ll be honest i got carried away with the build-up (pls know this abt me; i’m a WHORE for build-up (sorry not sorry)) but if you want to jump to the spicy part immediately, go find the second border, the smut will start there!! enjoy in any way you want !!! <33 feedback would be greatly appreciated xoxo
masterlist link | join my taglist
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“Good night, Y/N. Dream of me~”, your boyfriend lulls, as you’re cuddled into his breast, San’s sturdy arm cushioning your body from below, stroking your head that’s under his. He just finished talking about his lucid dreaming recently, fascinated that he can remember more details now, but you interrupted his talking, when he iterated a fight to you where he got his nose bleeding. 
“I don’t have to dream of you when you’re the dream already, Sannie,” you whisper, and with a giggle, he kisses your forehead. San has warned you about calling him ‘dream boyfriend’ multiple times, since he’s aways got, quote, “things to improve on”, but since it’s not dream husband yet, you’re left with no other description. 
“Ohh, sugarplum,” he coos and and pushes your face deeper into the crook of his neck, “don’t say that.”
San is a special case in every which way; in the way he’s this buff guy with guns for arms that he uses to keep you warm when you sleep — in the way San is has the energy of a bull that he stashes away to sing his girlfriend a lullaby — in the way that the Choi San who has dated so many women in his past and hooked up with them (with no ill feelings in the present, of course) has settled down with you, Y/N, a woman with no prior experience other than the media she has consumed.
So you keep telling it yourself in secret. San is, and will forever be, a dream boyfriend. He’s as good to you as you are seemingly to him, but course the topic of sex, at least the lack thereof, crosses you two’s conversations from time to time. 
It’s not like you had tried to save yourself for something, really not. It just… didn’t sound appealing to you, ever. You’ve shared to San that you don’t even masturbate that often, since you’ve never been able to get a satisfactory end— an orgasm— out of it. And while other men would laugh about such a thing, San has shown you nothing but understanding and support.
When you feel sorry for not being able to meet his sexual needs, he tells you he’s happy enough that you feel comfortable to share your discomforts with you. There is not one cell of his body that would mutate and judge you, San is fully devoted to your well-being.
What you forget sometimes is that while San is your first boyfriend, it’s your first time being a girlfriend, too. So being sorry for San is one thing, but wanting to love San more is another. At least you realised that this morning, when you woke up from your first ever wet dream.
You have been able to just ‘shake it off’ during the day and not think about it, but after San, being your soulmate he is, came up with the topic of “lucid dreaming”, and you could barely listen to his wild stories because of how distracted you were.
Maybe that’s why San thought you were tired and cuddled you to slumber so soon. Him cuddling you and getting your head under his chin is you two’s usual sleeping position, but well, huh… You’re not tired, not at all.
“I mean it,” you choke out, San humming, touched by your compliment, but of course he doesn’t know that by saying he’s a dream,you’re also referencing to how his hands were touching your private areas all around, his mouth in places that it’s never been in before in real life. ‘Tastes so good…’
“I love you so much, Y/N,” San exhales delightfully, fed by your fuzzy feelings, still caressing your head with gentle fingers, “but you know that I want you to hold me accountable.”
“Saaannie,” you murmur, your breath turning into a hot patch on his shirt, “just take it as it is.”
San notices your slightly agitated tone and chuckles, kissing your forehead again. “Y/N, my sugar-pie, what’s bothering you?” There has been no doubt in you that San wouldn’t catch on that you’re being weird, and though you’re really glad he did, it, for some reason, doesn’t make the topic any more easier. 
“It’s—“, you begin to stammer, and with your struggle comes San’s immediate help. He shuffles back a little bit so he can take an analytical look at you, all blushed and worked up over a dream you can’t even remember the half of. San’s eyes are droopy, and while right now, it’s because he’s tired, in your dream, it was because he wanted to ‘eat you up…’
“It’s too embarrassing to explain.”
San gets the arm away from below and leans his head against his hand, propping himself up. “Embarrassing?”, he asks and pouts with a slight smile, his dimples digging deep into his cheeks. “Is it an embarrassing matter or just you who’s soooo easy to embarrass, huh?”, San grins and taps your nose one time with his finger to loosen you up, looking you straight in the eyes to give you all his attention. He’s showing to you that you, dearest, could never be embarrassing to him. Everything you do, he’ll take serious and anything you say, San will listen to it, as he’s shown you over and over again, reaffirming it to you every day and night. 
‘I’m going to show you my love, all of it.’
San sees you licking your lips and putting your words together in your overwhelmed brain. You’re not nervous of how San will react, that is for sure, it’s just that… Where do you start? ‘Hey, boyfriend, I think I want to have sex with you?’ That does get the message across, but the words have to leave your mouth first. 
It’s hard. You don’t think you’ve ever said the word, ‘sex’ in the context of… actually having it, let alone desiring it. San watches you spiral— starting to inhale, but then losing your words— and strokes over your head, humming “Just start with the basic outline—“
“I had sex with you in my dream.”
San stops stroking your head for a hot second and you two are just looking into each other’s eyes. San notices now how red you have become, how flushed you look, what a cute girlfriend you are for being embarrassed about this and shit, how lucky he is that you’re his and not anybody else’s girlfriend who you are so adorable playing with your hair right after you just dropped the “s-bomb” on him.
You don’t know what’s worse: Him, waiting for you to continue your talking before he can react to your … attention-grabbing introductory sentence, or you, not having anything to follow up. He probably expects you to tell your dream, but— but not in front of San himself, no! You’re quiet and continue to be, until he takes it upon himself to break the silence.
“… Did you wake up?”
Huh?
“What? Of course I woke up, I’m here now.”
“No, sweetie,” San wheezes softly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, while you finally let your eyes stray away (his gaze is unbearable), “I’m asking whether you got to see the end of it.”
“The—“, you parrot him, and while you do San smiles sheepishly, apparently finding you so endearing while you are in mutilation, a foreign warmth growing in your stomach, “— end?”
“I just don’t want to scare you, Y/N,” San hums and twirls your hair around on his finger. “This is me asking where your head is in this situation.”
You blink and San pushes his lips out to indicate that he’s waiting for an answer, or at least something to give him to know if you’re in need of consolation or advice. “Uhm,” you inhale, “I… saw almost everything, I guess.”
His reaction could mean a lot. The dimple in his cheek getting deeper, his nose crunch, him sucking in his lip — it could mean a lot, but also so little.
“Almost everything,” San re-confirms, you know that this description is still very vague. 
Gathering your shards of confidence, you murmur, “I mean… We saw each other naked often, so I think that’s why my brain could— do that, but when it came to that, it… You know. It surprised me.”
“That,” San repeats and by now, he definitely understands the superficial parts of your dream, but you have yet to drop any details. Was the dream a good one? Or well, was he good?
As expected, he wouldn’t dare to ask you that right now, looking at how you’re stammering awkwardly. You can still read it in his eyes though; his curiosity is asking you whether your dream has changed your attitude about sex, let it be for the better or worse. 
You know San is going to show understanding regardless, right?
Yes, absolutely right.
“Y/N, sugar, we can talk about this tomorrow or any other day you like. I’ll keep it in mind, if that’s what you want.” 
Maybe you should say something before San thinks the dream has made you negatively speechless. Well, it did make you speechless the whole day, but now, you’re almost bursting with the things you want to say, like they’re brewing inside you but not getting flavourful yet.
“No, Sannie,” you whine and put your hand on your eyes to hide yourself from his way-too sincere eyes. This isn’t how people do it in the movies or in the books. They usually just… get it on, no? Like they eat each other up, like it’s a necessity for survival, like eating to meet hunger, like quenching your thirst. You don’t know if this is a feeling like that. Whether the uncomfortable warmth inside you is truly the embarrassment but rather the reaction of your memories. ‘Let yourself be all over me.’
“Yes, sweetie,” San croons, removing his hand from your head to leave you by yourself even more, your palms resting on your eye sockets.
You love him. You’ve never doubted this, and you’re not doubting it now. From the moment he confessed his love to you, you having to get used to the idea of being in a relationship to now, almost a year later. You’ve mentioned it to him haphazardly already, but you’ve done everything except have sex. It had been San’s idea to ease you into the twosome-ness of it all; ‘let’s be each other’s person’. He said that in your dream, too, and finally you understood it.
You remember your long-lived confusion before today too well. San was your person as you were his, him with his own set of needs and expectations, you with your own — but weren’t they contradictory? San needed the sex, didn’t he? Like… sexual needs? 
No, “sex isn’t a need”, San explained to you back then, “it’s a way!“
You tried to bring up the whole concept of orgasming being healthy to him, but he continued with “to me,” and you are reciting these words in your head as you try to think of something good to say, “sex is just one of many ways to love you, Y/N.”
So, truth be told, despite having a virgin girlfriend, he orgasms a healthy amount still. Sometimes San does it while you’re sleeping next to him, sometimes he feels like he can’t resist to look at your peaceful, tranquil, breathtaking face and does it in the bathroom, but essentially, he is not having sex, just getting rid of his ‘bodily mishaps’.
While you thought of sex as this strange way to get rid of stress, San thought of it as something way more, but he wouldn’t try to convince you of it, if you didn’t give him your “okay” to talk about it at all.
But here you are. Okay. You’re finally ready. Or maybe you’re not, but you’re ready to try, try with San, try San. He’ll be your person, get to know where you like to be touched, get to know where your sweet spots are and you will hopefully do just the same— touch, no, lick, no, touch, lick and suck everywhere he wants, pour your yourself over him. You’ve wanted to find out how to do that since you’ve dreamt of it since last night, processing the brain-sensation it has left you with for the whole day.
“Do you think you want to tell me about your dream first?“ 
“Can you kiss me?”
“H- huh?”
You get your hands from your eyes and your vision is too blurry to precisely get the picture of his rather shaken expression in. San thinks you’re bold. Mostly because that’s what you are right now. Bold. Still embarrassed, but encouraged and desperate. “Can you kiss me?”, you ask again before you fall into another pile of self-embarrassment. 
“I can, but I don’t know how it’s going to help—“
You pull his face closer to yours with both of your hands and San is the one who slightly turns red now. “Y/N,” he pants, and you have to suppress a cheeky smile, when you push his cheeks together to form a duck-face. 
Until you notice he’s not being sulky with the way he’s trying to push you away.
It takes you a while, how would you know that it was so easy to get men erected? Okay, you’ve seen San get a boner in the most uncomfortable situations several occasions, but usually they weren’t because of a direct cause. 
If he had worn a baggier set of pants, you probably wouldn’t have seen it, but it’s only his shorts today, and the whole outline of it is almost jumping into your face, you couldn’t have not seen it. Not remarking it also wouldn’t have helped the situation. Your situation. ‘I won’t stop, I won’t stop fucking you all night.’
“Is that why you don’t wanna kiss me, Sannie?”, you murmur and flutter with your eye-lids, once your realise you’ve been staring for too long down there.
In contrast the voyeuristic scene, it strangely does not become one of those erotic moments; with San’s whiny chuckle, it actually becomes kind of … bonny. Him getting a hard-on, when his girlfriend is quite figuratively trying to open up with him, it becomes a small detail to poke fun at, one to laugh about it with an amiable awareness that you’re not mocking each other.
“I’m sorry— ignore this— I can ignore this,” San tells you and flops on his back, grabbing all of the blanket to roll around it and leaving you cold with less. “Hey!”, you pout and grab the seam of the blanket to get under it, but San gets ahold of your wrists to prevent you from cuddling to his side.
Maybe it’s because there’s nothing else occupying San’s mind and body right now, with you knowing it, or the way you can’t keep your hands off of him and he’s desperately trying to avoid your touch, it seems like a short game of cat-and-mouse.
“I don’t care that you’re hard, Sannie!”, you whine and search for his vicinity, but he wiggles away, forcing you to be a bit more assertive and wring with him.
“But I do!”, he exclaims, not really understanding the weight that your words hold. You just told him that you’re not appalled by his erection, that should be a big sign that you’re, uh, up for conversation, no? Why are you being like this? Maybe to keep up the tension? Because it’s fun? Fun playing around with San— to watch him try to use as little strength as possible, knowing that once he gets just the tiniest bit of muscle in, you’ll be overthrown?
“Sannie,” you make a sullen face, breathing out, at your third try to get your arms around him with San’s hands on your wrist, but when you get caught in the blanket with your leg that he keeps pulling, it’s over the second he yanks you to the side.
Yanking you to the side meaning pulling you by your whole body— you landing on his belly, arms awkwardly angled towards your torso, leaning into his face.
“You men”, you theatrically moan to tease him even more and San is fighting with all his inner voices right now. Most of them are just empty screams of ‘what is happening?!’, but also muscle memory persuading him to wrap his arms around your perfect waist and pin you down— he’s trying, that’s what he’s yearning to tell you by pushing his eyebrows down. “I’m sorry.”
“Ohh, Sannie,” you sigh, letting your head drop on top of his breast, crossing your fingers into San’s, while he manages his breathing.
“This is why I’m no dream man, Y/N,” San pouts, feeling guilty having used his power over you. 
“It’s natural, isn’t it?”, you answer — letting your hands fall to each side of San’s body, and you feel like one of those people that usually tell you the same thing when the fact that you’re a virgin slips off your tongue. ‘It’s natural, isn’t it? That couples have sex?’ It should be and it’s going to be, thank you.
“I’m sorry, it’s just… I was really not prepared for that,” San wheezes and he raises one of your intertwined hands to touch your fingers with his lips.
“What? The cuddling or the dream?”
“The cuddling, in the context of the dream,” he answers honestly and inhales your sleepy scent from your fingertips, feeling how comfortable you lay on top of him.
“It was a good dream,” you conclude.
This was what San was trying to find out. Good or bad. And to his luck, it was good. Very good. ‘Such a good girl… So good to me.’
“Y/N?”
You accidentally zoned out, re-imagining your reverie; San all over you, sweat dripping down from his skin onto yours, his pelvis pistoning into your raised legs. How had your brain come up with that? It felt so… real. “Sorry, I got lost there for a second. What did you say?”
“How was he, that San in your dream?”
“The San in my dream, he,” you chuckle, feeling your breathing accumulate to your boyfriend’s, “… did everything, but he wasn’t careful, no.”
“What?!”, San exclaims, and it seems like he’s offended by his alter-ego to dare such a thing— he lets go off your hands in the shock and grabs you by your shoulders. “Not careful?!”
“Hmm,” you try and calm him down, letting your hands glide onto his pillowy breasts, massaging your fingers into his flesh by circling them, “he was inside… But a bit… Too fast for my liking? I mean, I don’t know my liking… I was enjoying it in my dream, but— uhm, I don’t think I could handle so much right now?”
San hums, as in to show that he heard what you said, but it took him a second of you burying your hands inside his armpits to inhale, “wait, right now?”, and remove his hands from your shoulders.
“Sannie,” you murmur with closed eyes, the buzzing feeling inside your lower abdomen swaying you to something like slumber, but if you’re not mistaken— and you’re sure that you can’t be mistaken about your own thoughts— it’s not a slumber that can be cured by sleep, but rather something else, “I couldn’t think of anything else today.”
He’s silent. He’s still breathing— thank goodness— but even though you can hear his breath leave his mouth, it doesn’t seem like San is going to say something. Pushing your upper body up, you tilt your head down.
He’s silent, sweaty and breathing, breathing heavily, staring upwards at you with sunken eyes, unable to let any of his thoughts leave the safe space of his mouth, because if San did, he’d give himself trouble for it. Seeing you fix your gaze— eyelids droopy from having been smushed into his breast— seems to only be adding fuel to his loss of good sense, and San is praying in his head that you won’t lick your lips once more, because oh god, if you did, you are going to be in so much more trouble than he is.
“Baby?”, you ask, and you swear you’re not trying to provoke him, since you only call him baby in the most special occasions, but right now, it just slipped out of you because San is being a bit strange. 
Boyfriends don’t act like this, do they? Your boyfriend doesn’t; that, you can be sure about.
“Sorry,” you correct yourself, hopefully to get rid of some of his— well, what was it— anxiousness?— no, frustration?, “I didn’t mean to say ‘baby’. It just slipped out.”
“N- no, Y/N, it’s not your fault, it’s mine,” San whines. “This may sound really weird, but while I would rather die than hurt you, sugar-pie,” he murmurs, avoiding your heavy gaze on him, “I am… a man. And I don’t know how comfortable you are with me, but I am fully, undeniably erected, Y/N. Don’t go around calling me��baby right now, or I’ll turn like the San in your dream.”
“How does an orgasm feel like, Sannie?”, you ask, purposefully innocent, but still in a way that makes it obviously suggestive, your tone dropping in an octave from its initial high-tone embarrassment. Where is your sudden confidence coming from? You don’t know, but- uh- well, you’re kinda over San here, both mentally and physically, it seems like. 
“It feels like…”, San sighs, both reminiscing his lifetime of orgasms and feeling pretty fucking awkward in general, to be explaining this to you, while his body is screaming for him to do anything but talking. 
“… It feels like being washed over by refreshing water on a hot summer day, after easing yourself into it with small splashes.” San is no poet and he sees this by how you’re flexing your face together, trying hard to understand.
“It feels like…,” he starts again, and you can swear you are feeling something twitch underneath you, and it’s probably his hard erection. “… Orgasm feel like, wow… How do they feel like, they— Uh…”
Somewhere between his words, San is looking at the ceiling, letting his eyes wander around everywhere your body isn’t laying dangerously close to his throbbing genital, but having to tell you how orgasms feel like is just the end of his senses. Now it’s not only his body urging him on, his girlfriend is trying to find out how they feel like without having experienced one, ever.
“… They are worth it.”
He’s trying to be a good boyfriend, but up until now, he’s been used to being the boyfriend of a virgin girlfriend who didn’t want sex at the moment. And that was the end of it. Definitely more than manageable, more doable than … this.
“Do you think I can enjoy them too?”, you question, revealing to him the true nature of your curiosity.
You’ve confirmed the pulsation between your legs seconds ago, when San let out a whine from his mouth, that was definitely not intended to sound as sexual as it did. You’re a virgin, not dumb, you know what’s seductive, sultry and arousing. Oh, you’re aroused, alright, maybe for the first time in your life— and your boyfriend is, too, so if this puzzle isn’t going to be put together this night, there must be something wrong in the air.
“I can’t speak for you, sugarplum. It was your dream, Y/N.”
“I don’t know how we started, but we were here, on our bed, naked, and you were… thrusting into me with this… almost scary vigour, it was— It was rough. And that one, I didn’t enjoy. You looked mean, Sannie.”
“I’m sorry,” San pouts and he looks downwards to show how sorry he is, but also to focus on your words only. If he sees your sweet face describing those things one more time, then he’ll have to disappear into the toilet soon. “I would never treat you like that.”
You blink a couple of times and lick your lips. “How would you treat me?”
“I would,” San mutters, finally meeting your eyes again, while he slowly, but surely begins to prop himself up by angling his arms, getting to your face-level. “I would treat you with care, reverence—with tenderness; I would get every inch of your skin to understand how it feels to be seen and loved, I would—“, he pants, he’s unable to breathe through his nose, and he just keeps on talking, he…
“YN, I— I would do everything to get to make your body flourish with my love, to make your heart grow with all I have, I want to—“
He goes silent.
Yes, San is a man. But it’s strange to you how he blames being a man for his weakness, but if there is a strong suit that your boyfriend has over you, it’s not being so strong that he can pull you down in a second— it’s having the mind of a lover, and a lover who promises to protect everyone he loves with his strength, and not because he’s getting his own satisfying release out of it.
A man and a lover; San is also your boyfriend, who knows what to tell you to make you grow weak. Let’s say he doesn’t do it a lot for reasons that include wanting to protect you, but as you are on top of him, listening to his words from beneath you, his words melt like fizzled honey on your tummy, crumbling with them. 
“I want you, Y/N. And that’s my selfish dream.”
Being pulled down by gravity as San’s upper body rises, down to his crotch, you let him work his silent ways. He pushes himself up the last inch that it takes to be under your face, and his skin radiates heat onto yours.
There is not even a centimetre separating you two and San finally finds his words. “Please”, he begs, his voice above a whisper, “let me be your dream, Y/N.”
“I thought we already went through that,” you chuckle, getting your arms on each of San’s shoulders now, “baby.”
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You can see he’s enjoying this a little too much, the way San is thoroughly covering every inch of your skin with butterfly kisses, as he has you laying on your back, letting you rub your hands over his torso to get used to the ‘intimacy’-part of it all. 
Getting naked was an easy process, being exposed to the very last skin on the other hand, not. You’ve never been naked in front of him for this specific occasion, and since he knows, San doesn’t dare to rush you into more touching than needed, allowing your underwear to wrap around your privates until he’s finished giving you goosebumps all over the body. 
With his soft lips, San kisses your shoulders and collarbones, whispering words of comfort into them, while you try your best to not make any lewd sounds. You didn’t know they came naturally, you had thought it was acting but — oh, goodness — no. 
“Sugar,” San sputters— rearranging himself over you, one knee between your legs, the other over your leg, “let ‘em out. Let the sounds out.”
You gulp, as he glides his hand across your stomach to your lower abdomen, slightly scratching the seam of your panties, and San has placed his lips at your jawline, his voice vibrating in your ear, peppering kisses around the corner of your neck, entrancing you to fall deeper into your mattress, sighing in the calming feeling of your boyfriend.
“Only because you wanna hear me,” you murmur and wrap your arms around his upper body, running your hands across his back muscles that ease into your touch. “And that’s a bad thing, because…?”, San hums and begins to get lower with his kisses and his thumbs caressing where your pantyliner meets your thighs, warming up the small patch of skin there.
“Hmm,” you breathe out, San’s lips working their way down your cleavage, “Good… point.”
San smirks and brings his hands up, not letting a second pass where he is not feeling you under his fingertips. “There is nothing more that I want to hear,” he murmurs, his eyes appearing to become a bit foggy from your scent, San becoming absolutely lost in it, “except you, my love.”
Your breath comes out stuttered and stroke his bangs away to the side in order to have a better view on his face above your breast. He’s radiant, but as much as he’s excited to be doing this, San will stop as soon anything leaves your mouth asking him to, he promised you. In your dream, San just kept going. That’s why you didn’t want to retell the story. He forced you around, he thrusted into you with no choice, and he wouldn’t stop, until your dream cut off without you having orgasmed once throughout the thing.
So the dream itself didn’t get you to want this, and San knows this, the curiosity did. Curiosity of reaching the edge that you missed in your sleep, which you think you can only reach with the real San, with your real boyfriend.
“Can I touch you here, sugar?”, San asks, his upper body hovering over your torso, lips approaching your face, hands gliding up by your waist to meet your ribs. He’s done a good job not staring at your exposed nipples, but following the way from your jawline, neck, and collarbones, this is the next area to appreciate.
“Yes, please,” you answer, cupping your boyfriend’s cheek with one hand, inviting him to kiss you softly. San encloses your breast with a hand that has up to no muscle tension in it, kindly allowing it to get used to the new, but warm contact.
His rosy lips meet yours and he presses several kisses on them, reminding you of how much familiarity you’re dealing with right now. You kiss San all of the time, for all the reasons you love him, and as he kisses you right now, at this sleepy midnight, he’s showing you why sexual intercourse is just a fancy term to describe something so complex, that it actually becomes simple. He loves you. That’s all he has to do to have or not have sex with you.
With his palm, San brushes over your nipple, and by wonder, it hardens and makes goosebumps run over your back.
“You look so beautiful,” San lulls, smooching your lips one more time before he can finally take a look at your breasts and gulp, lick his lips, and ask you, “may I?”
“You may.”
The last kiss lingers delicately on your opened lips, as San breathes in your breast, kneading and softening it up. Automatically, you exhale and run your fingers through his uncombed hair. He sucks once and twirls his tongue around your hardened nipple, and with your very valuable feedback, his other hand draws a long line across your curvature.
“Sannie... Baby…”, you whine, the slow, but sensual licking sending you down a sensation of being tickled and being caressed at the same time.
“Yes, pie?”, San grins, proud that he’s making you feel this way, no, that it’s him that is making you feel this way for the first time in your life. With each of your sweet sounds, his pride and ego grows and his lips lap around your nipples razzingly. 
You tug at his hair and send him down deeper into your skin, slightly pushing him to get his head where you’ve found that you feel best, grabbing the fabric of the bedsheets under you with your other hand.
“It feels so good,” you whine, and San chuckles after seeing your grip, gliding his hand right between your ticklish fingers. 
“Yeah?”, he coos and presses another kiss onto your mouth, adoring the way your eyebrows twitch inside according to his voice. “I’ll make you feel even better…”
San caresses the area under your boob, whispers into your ear, “Will you let me?”, and you nod, words inside your head turning into hazy exhales out of your mouth.
“You won’t regret it,” San chuckles and crosses his fingers into the surface of your hand, using your own hand to slowly, but surely slide down your stomach. You kind of get the idea of what he’s trying to do, but not really the image.
“You think I won’t regret it?”, you ask him, a bit anxious, — it’s your first time, after all— your soft skin under both of your fingertips becoming one, as he leads the hand down. “I don’t know so,” San admits, comforting you by kissing your forehead, “so I’m going to make you believe it, first.”
“Hm?”
San pushes his upper body up with the hand that has been at your breast and glides it behind your back, so he can get between you and the mattress, his naked upper body pressed against your shoulder. He plants an uncountable number of kisses onto your neck, and assists you down to your panties, keeping his eyes on you to confirm you’re okay with all that he’s doing.
You’ve never touched yourself on this bed. The last time you did was somewhere in your gleeful high-school teens, long before you met San, and if you’re honest, you’d rather have him touch you, but when San kisses you on the lips and both of your hands slide under the seam of your underwear. The rough fabric of the lace scrapes San’s hand and you meet the hot slickness you’ve become inside.
“Would you look at that,” San purrs, voice wispy— his finger is the only one to glide against your wet labia and explore the untouched lips. It helps that your hand is down there too, and it feels like a rubber hand illusion, you touching yourself while San does it for you.
“Y/N,” San moans into your ear, stirred by the sensation that is you. “You feel so good, don’t you, sugar?”
You inhale sharply, when San’s finger strokes over your clitoris, and straight away, your boyfriend presses kisses onto your temple. “S- Sannie,” you whine and provoked by your sounds, his finger circles around your clit again. 
Sparks, tingles — you name it. With San kissing you all around the face to counteract the new stimulation, you can’t keep your legs straightened, folding your thighs around your and San’s arm with an overwhelmed sigh. “Sannie…”, you repeat yourself and look him in the eye.
“Aww, sugar,” San smiles and catches your forlorn gaze, flushed and drowned in his kisses. Your cheeks are burning red, but the same thing goes for San. Both of you are drunk in love, falling for each other deeper with every breath you take.
“Is this good?”, he asks and rubs your back with his thumb, the other finger teasing the slick entrance. “Y- yes,” you answer and San crunches his nose in admiration, slowly easing his finger around the tissue. 
“Can you touch yourself for me?”, is San’s second question and you gulp at the sincerity in your boyfriend’s voice. He’s talking two octaves deeper, raspy, lascivious; he’s promiscuous in all he is doing, let it be nibbling at your earlobe, rubbing your clit, caressing your spine with utmost libertine care— you have a feeling you’re developing another crush for your boyfriend.
“Y- yes,” you stutter, but a bit anxious about doing something wrong. It feels so right when San does it, but he’s the more experienced one in this— at least that’s what you think. He removes his hand from the surface of yours and lets you do the rubbing for a short moment, and you try to replicate what he did to you, flicking your finger over your clitoris.
“Doing it so well,” San comments and he raises your upper body with his arm, making you sit up, slithering down while smothering your lower abdomen with sloppy kisses.
“R- really?”, you ask, and San nods, while kissing the inner sides of your thighs, his eyes looking at you sideways. “Of course. It’s your body, Y/N. Your beautiful, gorgeous body.”
As San gutters, you feel something swaying on your clit, when your boyfriend smirks and looks directly at your pussy. He’s so handsome, San is making you nervous, and his eyes are drilling into you lustfully.
“You’re so beautiful everywhere, sugar, what have I done to deserve this?”, he pants, hooking himself from under your thigh, hands resting on your hip bone.
You don’t know what to answer and just flutter with your eyelashes, exhaling, when San sticks his tongue out and slides across your slickness it in one stroke, looking up at you to catch your whiny reaction. He deserves all of it, not because he was patient enough to wait for it, but because San is the one to make you feel this pretty in the first place.
“It’s probably really predictable I was going to say this, but I can’t not say it, ” San gutters, his dimple dug deep into his cheek— he’s smiling, licking his lips, “you taste amazingly sweet, my love.”
You press your lips together and feel like you have to push San into your arousal again by his hair, combing through it. “D- do it again,” you beg, and San’s heart flutters. Not letting you wait, he inhales through his nose and laps his mouth around your glistening cunt. You already knew he was good with his tongue for you have french-kissed him before, but— but this is another type of tongue-work. 
It’s slow, it’s sensual, but it still feels so exhilarating— how he’s sucking in your clitoris, laving over your muscled entrance that reacts to the movement of his tongue; it makes you breathe heavily and let out feathery moans.
“Feels so good,” you hush, and stroke his hair. San hums and at smiles with his eyes, getting one hand away from your leg to slowly run it towards your vagina.
“Are you really going to … make me cum?”, you ask, a bit plumply, both out of rush and nervousness. 
“I would like to, yes,” San answers, kissing you all around the pelvis bone. His lips have become plump and his nose is also painted rosy red from how he planted his face into you. “Will you allow me to?”
“Please be careful,” you appeal and San nods. “Yes, Y/N. I promise I will never do anything to you that will hurt you. Not like that stupid… dream-San you talked about.”
You chuckle and caress his jawline with your thumb, San leaning his head into your hand. “I know you would never do that, Sannie,” you say and prop yourself with an elbow. “Please make me cum.”
San wants to say something, but he bites his lip and suppresses it, crawling closer to your throbbing, heated pussy. “What is it, baby?”, you ask him, and this time, you deliberatelywant to tease him by calling him that, winking slyly at him.
Your boyfriend blinks in disbelief and lets out a light-hearted scoff, his breathing comes in and out stuttered. “Y/N,” San hums, putting a leg over his shoulder and you feel like more air is hitting your wetness, “you have no… idea… what those words are doing to me.”
Your boyfriend gulps, and as you peek at him innocently, having to get used to the new position, he looks amazed and set ablaze. Is this your ‘aroused face’? You, with your lips parted ever-so soppily, looking sultry and lovable— San is savouring this sight, oh, this sight, and saving it into his brain so it will never leave his mind, add it to the collection of his memories of you.
“Show me,” you whisper, a fire starting to enflame in you, demanding San to extinguish it.
“There’s nothing else in the world I’d rather do,” San hums and with that sentence, he’s at your cunt again, but more eager this time. The tongue flicks faster over your clitoris, his pants are getting breathier against your skin— San wants you, wants all of you, and before you know it, there’s a thumb rubbing at the entrance, notifying you that he is going to be penetrating soon.
“I’ll make you come over and over,” San breathes, and his eyes are filled with lust, hunger, desire, thirst— and you gasp at the sight of it alone, but his voice, his heart, his mind, is all painted and drowned in something purely innocent that is love. “Is that alright with you, sweetheart?”
He asks as if you stand a chance to resist him, but San seems to be doing this for the enjoyment that is pleasing you, and you’re more than happy to allow him to have his body all over yours for the sakes or it, because you love him so much. You’re already excited for when you know how to get your body all over his.
“That,” you exhale, feeling his thumb be replaced by his digit, the muscle of your entrance closing in on the finger tip, “is alright with me. I’m in, Mr. Choi, the deal’s settled.”
San chuckles at your light-hearted joke and you giggle as well, which allows his finger to glide into you slowly. Of course you’re tight, but you find it fascinating how your muscles ease around him and suck his finger in, the slickness squelching, as he licks over your slit.
“Looking forward to our cooperation,” he grins, lips pressed against your pussy and you can feel yourself slowly turning into mush. Your abdomen feels strangely ticklish, and there’s this pulling feeling that makes your body rock.
“… Ms. Choi.”
You scoff— San gave you his last name, how silly of him— but your amusement doesn’t hold on for too long, when San begins to move his finger around, angling it up and down.
“Mmhf,” you gutter and your legs close down on his head, the second leg finding its place on his other shoulder. “That—“, you try to gasp, but San being the quick learner he is, keeps stroking that one spot which got to this reaction in the first place.
“S- San!”, you whine; fuzzy, dizzy, light-heated, feeling like you’re going to shoot into space, to other worlds, and come right back to earth. In the meanwhile, your boyfriend’s tongue flicks even faster, head stuck between your thighs, his finger sliding in and out of you until you’re a whimpering mess.
“I’m here, baby,” he murmurs, finally looking up to you, wishing to meet your eyes again, but your head is rolling to the back, your upper body feels heavy and you slightly fall to the back, having to grab his hair to support yourself.
“I- I,” you stutter, feeling like there’s something that’s sizzling for explosion, and it seems San is feeling it too, in the way your pussy is tightening around his finger, and half-laughing out of glee about this discovery, San props himself up a little bit, your lower body raised from the mattress.
“Cum, sugar, cum,” he whispers, and as he adds a second finger that fills you up in a way that one finger couldn’t achieve, you fully suffocate him with your thighs, the thin string holding you away from release finally snapping. 
“Fuck!”, you moan, and at first, San is surprised about your cussing, but then his eyes grow big, when there is more fluid coming out of your vagina that hasn’t been there beforehand. Explosion, sweet release, what should you call it? An orgasm— that’s what this is, but no, you’re also squirting, lower body spasming as you do so, and San is trying to react quickly by slurping it all in, but it’s too much— your bed gets wet. He drives the two fingers in and out and makes you a mess, makes a mess, makes you messy, getting all your squirt out and inside his mouth.
“San— Sannie— Baby!”, you pant, overstimulated by his fingers and lips that will just not stop, and you fear you’re going to choke your boyfriend to death with your thighs, but the same tingle appears in your lower abdomen again, felt everywhere in your tightness.
“Come on, come on, come on,” San growls, short of breath, and by angling his fingers upwards your walls, you see stars again, throwing your head into the bed and you pull at his hair, harshly and roughly, gripping his scalp for dear life, when you’re shot into bliss again.
“Ooooh baby,” San howls wispily, repeating his motion, but less ecstatic this time in order to not make you pass out from pleasure, if that happens at all.
And as licks the remaining fluid of his lips, and gets you back down again, San doesn’t lose any of his excitement, hair ruffled by your grip, lips swollen from using them so much. “Can I do that again? Can I please do that again?”
“Wha— What about you?”, you ask, panting, knowing that the penis inside his pyjamas has been hard since almost an eternity, but it seems like San doesn’t care about that at all. He looks euphoric, he looks like he saw a god (a goddess, mind you) and San just shakes his head.
“Don’t think about me, I’m,” he admits, and what you don’t know is that he just came inside his pants, when San saw your stunning orgasm-face— and he definitely has to clean it up before it soaks through, “all cared for here.”
San shuffles away from your legs to your face and kisses your forehead, wiping a bit of sweat away. “I’m gonna get towels and you’re gonna make yourself ready for a second time, alright?”
“But—“
“Will there be a ‘but’?”, San asks, and he’s prepared to let all go and just take a shower, but you just scratch your neck. “Don’t you want to fuck … me?”
“Ohhh, don’t worry, sugar, I want and will,” San grins and you smile, feeling a bit light-headed because of your first orgasm. For this to be your first orgasm, while many of your friends had their first time without having orgasmed—… it’s a lot, to admit the least.
Not to say that you’re trying to compare with them and feel superior, but if this is what’s waiting for is worth, you’d spend all that time again. 
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Again. And again, and—
“Again!”
You’re breathing heavily, skin slippy from your sweat — or, well, both of you are covered in body fluids, there are pearls of sweat dropping down on San, who, despite rubbing you clean with his hands, doesn’t even bother anymore to dry his wet arm anymore.
“Sannie,” you exhale, when San kisses your from behind, as you sit between his legs, “I- I th-think this is enough, I’m r-ready.”
“Hmmm?”, he hums, pressing his naked upper body at your back, his two fingers coming out of you for the nth time. Your hips have been spasming around for a long while now, and you feel sensitive and over-stimulated at your clitoris, but if there is one thing you’re still curious about after all those orgasms, it’s how San feels inside you not with his fingers but his girth.
“I want your dick inside,” you command directly, too sex-drunk to express your wish in any other way.
“Are you sure?”, San asks and kisses the nape of your neck. “We can do it any other time, sugar-pie, aren’t you tired by now?”
“Are you?”
“Of course not.”
You turn your head around and slightly pant, seeing San not lose any of his desirous colour in his eyes. “Then let’s not lose any time.”
San presses a deep kiss on your temple before he leaves your back, and you feel the warmth of his lips sit there, as he positions himself at the front, on his knees. He still has his boxer-shorts on, but that only goes so far, when he’s been leaking with pre-cum, never-mind has come in the same set an hour ago.
You can see it perfectly— San’s length, his girth, the way it moves by itself under the fabric; it looks captivating as much as it is arousing you again after all the times you’ve orgasmed this evening. 
“Do you want to touch me?”, San asks, and trails his own hand over his breast, giving you an idea of what you can do to pleasure him. 
“Yes, baby,” you answer and get on your knees as well, grabbing San by the hips and caressing the seam of his shorts with your thumbs. In the meanwhile, your lips seek for his vicinity and you place kisses on his neck. “I’d love to.”
“I love you so much,” San sighs and holds you by your head tenderly with both hands, cupping the circular form, feeling you get a taste of his sweaty skin at his neck. His Adam’s apple bops, when you slightly pull his boxers down and there’s resistance from his erection.
“You have a big dick, right?”, you ask, and San coughs— he was expecting you to say ‘I love you’ back first.
“U- uh,” he stammers, “yeah. It’s- uhm. I hope it’s not too big, Y/N.”
“Can it be too big?”
You ask him with genuine curiosity and San scratches the back of his head. “I was preparing you thoroughly for it, honey, that’s all… I can say.”
He harrumphes in the awkward conversation, and before he can get shy from your stare, you chuckle and kiss him, “I love you too, Sannie. I couldn’t imagine doing this with any other person.”
Your boyfriend slides his hand to your jaw and pulls up your head to kiss you, mumbling, “only do this with me, Y/N,” into your lips.
As his lips work against yours, you slide down your hands into his boxer-shorts and use your wrists to spread the spandex, getting San’s underwear off. 
With your eyes closed, you hear San breathe in deeply through his nose and he rubs your back with both of his hands to push your naked body against his. 
His dick feels hot, wet and mild, when it presses against your abdomen, and you subconsciously grind your lower body to identify it better. It is big. The two fingers don’t even come close to what you’re working with here, and in the moment, it’s really good that you feel loosened up by the numerous times San made you come.
“Please touch me,” San instructs you and you nod, opening your eyes to see his glistening tip pointed towards you. Without waiting, you leniently wrap your hand around it and San parts your lips to pant.
“I don’t think I’ll hold on for long,” he whimpers, and his pelvis twitches, when you squeeze your hand around the soft, heated, slick muscle.
“Wait, Sannie… Do we have condoms?”, you ask and to your surprise, San opens up the cupboard. You loosely remember when San asked you if he should buy condoms at the beginning of your relationship, and you know that you answered with an ‘I don’t know’ back then.
A year later, it turns out San has bought a pack, but didn’t talk about it until the time was ripe. “Do you want to do it for me?”, he asks you, ripping apart the plastic wrapper with his finger and mouth. That this took a wet dream to realise is funny to you, but as you’re in the moment, you can only gulp in anticipation.
You nod and continue to pump his length in your grasp, when you’re handed the flimsy condom. Is that even going to fit around him?
“Yes, it is going to fit,” San giggles at your subconsciously asked question, and then kisses you, “did dream-San wear a condom?”
You place the center of the condom on the tip of penis and slowly glide down the lubed silicone by the ring.
“No, I don’t think so,” you murmur, though you couldn’t care any less about your dream right now. San hums and bucks up his hip into your hand, making the condom hit the end of his length.
It frankly looks quite comical, the way the white outlines your boyfriend’s dick, but before you can laugh, San delicately pushes you at your ass— other hand on the back of your head to not make you hit the bed-frame, with you landing on your back, legs angled towards the sky.
San tsk’s about his alter-ego’s wrong-doings and shakes his head. “I think your brain has a very twisted image of me.”
You chuckle at how sulky San is about it, though you can’t take any responsibility. You also don’t know how your brain cooked up the imagination of San ramming into you raw, especially when your biggest fear has been that things were going to hurt. (Now that you know they don’t, you’re good to go, you think.)
But the real San touches you softly, carefully, endearingly faintly, even if his dick looks intimidatingly big; you’re covering your mouth at the sight of it alone. 
“Come on, don’t be shy now,” San grins and flops his protected peen on your pussy, the girth of it weighing down on your sensitive bud.
“Sannie, baby, please be gentle,” you whine and San caresses your cheek, not finding your plead in any way offensive. 
“I will, sweetheart,” he whispers, and his voice sounds sweet, melts sweetly in your ears, but when his tip is there, at your entrance, you have to grab his hand at your cheek forcefully.
It’s a stretch. If you had known it would have come to this, you would have asked San to add a third, no, maybe even a fourth finger, but maybe he knew too, that even that wouldn’t have helped with a lot.
Not to say that it hurts, but to feel your muscle be extended as he just pushes in the tip, you’re already panting. San intertwines his fingers and leans forward, trying to calm you down. “Are you okay, baby?”, he asks, pouting. “I can stop.”
“N- no,” you stutter, though the bit of movement has had him slide in deeper and thus, your cunt be stretched further. “It’s okay. Just be slow. I can do it.”
“No, Y/N, you have to want it,” San sighs and you press your face against his hand. “I want it,” you murmur, glancing up at him. “I want you, Sannie.”
He smiles in awe of your droopy eyes and luscious lips reaffirming your love to him, and San inhales deeply. “I’ll move a bit more, okay?”
“Okay.”
Both of you inhale at the same time, but it’s San this time to moan it out. “Oh, god,” he whimpers, “feels so good, Y/N. Feels so fucking good.”
And this is where you close your eyes and let your boyfriend do his thing over you, because San’s sounds are candy to your ears. He’s doing it slowly, and heaven knows he can’t push it just entirely just yet, but the first third that San has inside you is enough to make you grip the sheets.
“Are you alright? Baby, is it too much? Can I do more?”, San whines, and you’re too weak-hearted for his arousal-sake, that you sigh sultrily and say, “Sannie, you know what to do.”
“No, no, baby, please don’t say things like that, I really won’t—“
He groans and pushes himself further in. You have to strain your forehead and pull in your eyebrows to work around the fact that you have never felt your cunt be stuffed in like this, and oh god, you feel so stuffed.
“Baby, please tell me when you want me to stop,” San begs you, concerned about your facial expression, kissing your cheek repeatedly. 
“This just feels unfamiliar, that’s all,” you whimper and San pulls out a little bit while you talk. “But you will tell me, right?”, he asks you, and gets a nod in return. You should be seeing black in front of you, given that you’ve closed your eyes, but after San pushes himself in again, there’s a piercing zap that makes you open your eyes wide.
“Sannie, wait—“
He immediately stops and both of you look at each other. San doesn’t move, anxious that anything will make you more anxious, when you grab him by his arms. 
And with one glance down, you see it.
Blood.
Not a lot, fortunately so, but still, bleeding from your privates outside your period is terrifying, and it makes all of your heat flee away— 
Blood!
There’s not a scream or a gasp leaving your mouth, rather just a short soundless inhale that indicates your surprise, when you close your eyes and cover them with the surface of your hands.
Blood?!
“Oh my god, sugar,” San exclaims silently, you don’t know if this is a first for him as well— and though both of you don’t panic as loudly as you could have, your boyfriend still looks mortified, eyes ripped open, mouth opened by a slit, when you remove your palms from your eyelids. “Did I hurt you? Did it hurt? Oh my god, Y/N, I’m so sorry, I—“
“No, Sannie, it didn’t hurt— It didn’t—“
Not panicking, but still both stammering and not aware of what to do with your hands. 
He pulls out and covers your private with the towel that he used to catch your fluid before, and San immediately claims a serious expression on his face, looking around to find something for you to hold onto. He finds you a pillow, puts it over your stomach, and you cuddle into it, trying to catch a breath. 
You didn’t lie. It didn’t hurt, it really didn’t. At least not even half the the amount of blood that is covering the towel, and you don’t think anything else (let it be more preparation or whatever) could have had helped you two in this situation. Is it just a matter of luck? Of your body? Well, maybe you’re out of luck and your body is going lax as well.
San is removing the condom from his dick and fetching his boxer-shorts again to fully call it quits, using approximately 4 seconds before he disappears in your arms again and smothers you with kisses.
“But— but Sannie…”, you whimper, feeling kind of guilty to be leaving him hanging like this after he’s done so much for you, but he silences you with his lips.
“Don’t you dare say sorry, sugar-pie,” San smiles and brushes over your hair, continuing to peck your face, as he hugs you from aside, and his warm skin soothes the goosebumps you got from seeing red on yourself. “As long you’re not hurting.”
“Do you want to take a shower or do you want to sleep?”, San asks you and you shiver a little bit once the adrenaline has worn down and all that provides you comfort is your boyfriend’s vicinity. “I don’t know, Sannie,” you murmur into his breast and a hand rubs your back. You’re still naked, but San covers you up with a blanket. “You don’t have to know, sugar,” San whispers and rests his chin on top of your head. “Just be here with me, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
You nod into his embrace, feeling exhausted, worn out and tired, and you start to breathe heavily into his skin, San rubbing his thumb across your lower back to match the rhythm of your breathing, your heartbeat slowing down.
You’re safe.
You’re home.
You’re not dreaming, you’re with your boyfriend, Choi San, and even though nobody will know what kind of dreams will visit you, what nightmares will make you wake up in the middle of the night, you’re, well, in love.
Comfortable, soft, warm, at ease, serene — happy; this is what love feels like. A dream doesn’t come close to the unworried warmth love provides, to the warmth the real San provides, and while you doze off, you and San whisper affirmations into each other’s presence that you’ll,
“Dream of me, Y/N.”
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i-am-hungry-24-7 · 7 months ago
Note
Wait the lower one is from me but i don't really remember the whole details of what I've written there 😭😂 lemme dig my brain first 😔 but i remember mentioning something abt TF 141 with good smelled reader and they can't keep themselves from clinging or getting closer to reader (?)
🦈
Sharkiee 🥹 I'm lucky enough since you still remember a bit of the request! and actually I was thinking about good smelled reader these days too, but my ass get caught in my job these days 🫨 here's some hcs but I feel like there's still a lot of things I can brainrot, I'll add more to this when I can form them into words asdfghjk, as always tyvm for the ask🫡💖
Price He rarely smokes when you’re aside because it will cover your scent.  Invades your personal space on the helo when you guys are heading back to base so he can bask in your smell. It’s refreshing and unlike those stinky men he says. The sleep-deprived captain got a lavender pillow from you, and he threw his old one immediately, hadn’t been so excited to end the day and sleep after years, because you used the same pillow, and your hair smells literally like it, and he relaxed lot more with it. (when you're both on leave then he will ditch it since he has you instead)
Soap Kick him into the shower before he smears his sweat on you with how much he likes to cling to you and is unable to pry off after missions. Getting called Soap is obviously unrelated to his body wash, the plain 3 in 1 one that makes you just shove your shower gel in his grasp. You know he just wants to steal yours so he can smell like you, but if you buy him the same product he’ll still snatch yours. Makes you wear his shirts so he can get it back and wear your scent like cologne around, he doesn’t care if you yell ew at him, nor he care that others might tease him for getting claimed by you, to be honest, that’s his goal. Everyone should know he’s knee-deep for you.
Gaz He smells good or at least not bad after missions, but still loves to tail after you. Maybe you two share the same perfume, but he insists that it smells different on you (bastard just want to find an excuse to squish himself against you, but the rejections always swallowed by you before they can come out, his beautiful eyes aren’t just decorations, he knows you’re weak when he looks at you with pleading eyes) Personally think that Gaz probably has some weird obsession with your nape, and when you spray your perfume there every morning, it’ll attract him like he’s a pokemon, sneak a chance to sniff and press a kiss there until you scowl at him. You put on lotions after showers to prevent dry skin? He won’t miss the chance to help you. Maybe that’s the secret you always smell so enchantingly, if you shoo him off and say you can do it yourself, he will look at you with sad eyes till you feel guilty and hand him the bottle of body lotion.
Ghost Caught him secretly sniffing around you after a mission and he didn’t talk to you the whole night out of embarrassment. He just sat on the bed and tried to intimidate you with his stare (0 damage when his cheeks were pink whenever you tease him). In the end he just gave in and admitted he loves how well you smell 24/7, and when you’re both on leave, he will drown himself in your bed sheets or the plushie you have. The plushie is his now, don’t expect to have it back unless he feels like your scent on it fades, that’s when you can squeeze it between you and him during sleep.
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diorsluv · 11 months ago
Text
feather , part 18
“ your signals are mixed ”
series m. list previous chapter next chapter
( socialmedia!au )
yourusername
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liked by luca.fantilli, dylanduke25, jackhughes, and 37,976 others
yourusername tell me that we’ll be just fine
view all comments
username15 FUCK IM SO CONFLICTED. THE TAYLOR REFERENCE BUT THIS POST IS HER AND BANK ROBBER
username67 wait ok but seeing her torn up like this is NOT okay
_alexturcotte oh no
lhughes_06 even when u lose ur mind?
→ yourusername tell me that it’s not my fault
username89 GODDDD the fact that luke knows the reference and finished it for her 💔
→ username27 fr it was luke NOT baxter ❌
username23 she and luke need to be together i’m begging
trevorzegras TAYLOR SWIFT
→ yourusername mama taylor 🫡
username58 i don’t like this booker guy and for good reason, like he can’t be out here breaking my girl’s heart like this
username33 ok but luke has that missseraphina girl or whatever her @ is
adamfantilli the matching stitch costumes
jamie.drysdale ily and i’ll always support you but you know what i think and i think it’s time you take my advice
liked by yourusername
username9 lets talk abt how she only responded to two people and one of them was luke
edwards.73 you know we’re here for you
markestapa i’ll beat his ass i swear to god
username71 stop they’re so protective of her
mackie.samo say the word and we’ll be there
username45 tbh the insta drama is kind of embarrassing
username68 she’s not acting like herself and it’s all because of HIM
username34 idgaf what balthazar thinks he can get away with but ik it aint this
username8 fuck bjorn
yourusername
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liked by mackie.samo, colecaufield, _quinnhughes, and 88,117 others
yourusername finally posting the lakehouse pics i was gatekeeping for months 🫣🫣
tagged: jackhughes, trevorzegras, _quinnhughes
view all comments
dylanduke25 MARSHMALLOWS ROASTING ON AN OPEN FIREEEE
→ markestapa it’s chesnuts not marshmallows
→ dylanduke25 i know. 😐.
→ yourusername JACK FROST (hughes) NIPPING ATTTTTT YOUR LIPS
username46 are we just gonna pretend like that post from this morning never happened??
→ username59 if she does it, we do it
trevorzegras I MADE IT ON THE MAIN AGAIN!!!!
→ yourusername trev sweetie you gotta stop acting like i don’t post you constantly
username31 is that luke’s back or quinn’s back
→ yourusername it’s quinn!
colecaufield there’s no way you got QUINN to tan with you
→ _quinnhughes bro you were there when she took the pics
→ colecaufield oh was i??
→ _alexturcotte nah it was me rmb i’m the only one that’s seen her recently
→ colecaufield STOP RUBBING IT IN MY FACE
mackie.samo we never see you post yourself anymore 😔
→ yourusername i’m more focused on the scenery around me matthew.
→ mackie.samo OKAY OKAY u didn’t have to pull out the government name
→ markestapa she’s lying she just doesn’t have enough storage on her phone anymore
username26 that pic of jack and quinn i’m dyingggg
jackhughes remember when you burned 12 marshmallows in a row
→ yourusername remember when you said you were in love with me when you got drunk for the first time
→ jackhughes YO
→ _quinnhughes yeah how the hell do you burn that many marshmallows consecutively
lhughes_06 oh so am i just banned from all your posts now
→ yourusername 👎
username83 PLEASE I NEED MORE LAKEHOUSE POSTS
username15 didn’t quinn accidentally post jack trying to drown her on his public story once 😭
→ username2 WHAT.
next chapter notes ) a little tamer than the past few chapters, AND WE’RE GETTING RID OF BOOGER SOON SO LET’S CELEBRATE
tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes
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aikuse · 6 months ago
Text
-> first meeting: first sunset | 1,425 words. gn!reader, reader wears a bikini, alcohol consumption.
author’s notes: he’s so summer love, god. i’ll probably expand on this eventually but this is very selfship coded,,,also semi-inspired by @dearkiryu and i's convos abt him 🤭
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you remember the first time you met jo togame.
you’d just gotten off the plane, the smell of the sea tingling your nose as you had bounded into the terminal, your carry-on in tow. you make it to your hotel without issue, and spread out on the bed, rolling around the soft sheets and smiling to yourself.
the beach had drawn you in quickly, pulling you by the strings of your bikini as you wander across the sand. a few chairs are set up, scattered across the beach in speckles of blue and white and teal. you’d sat for a long time in the spot of your choice, sipping on one of the beers in your cooler.
you’d been swiping through the matches in your phone absentmindedly, not really invested but interested to see where things go. you don’t even pay attention to what the guys look like; many of them look so similar. surf body, blonde curls, blue eyes. “yes, i get it, you live in california,” you mumble to yourself as you toss your phone in your bag, pulling your sunglasses over your eyes and settling back into the chair to drift off for a little bit.
a shadow casts over you, and you squint, looking up.
it’s a man. and he’s pretty.
you lean up, squinting. “can i help you?”
the man shrugs, moving out of the sun’s way and sitting on the chair next to you, the supports squealing under his weight. he was tall, muscles rippling underneath his skin; at least six feet with pretty braided black hair, wisps of it falling across the sides of his face. he’s wearing those translucent sunglasses, tinted orange as he leans over, wiggling his phone.
“didn’t think i’d meet one of my matches so soon.”
you gasp, looking through your phone. sure enough, there he was, looking exactly the same as he did before you. except in his photo, he’d had brilliant green eyes.
the same ones that held your gaze now, with nothing but kindness behind them.
“s-sorry,” you manage to stammer out, embarrassment flooding through your system. “i didn’t think i would either.”
he chuckles, a deep rumble in his chest as he leans back. “don’t worry ‘bout it. did ya mind if i kept ya company for a little while?”
there’s something about him that pulls you in. it could be his voice and its lilting tone; perhaps his eyes? or maybe even the way he’s holding the same beer you’re drinking right now, as you look down and notice there’s one extra missing.
you gasp again. “did you steal one of my beers?”
he answers with a shrug, a smirk tugging at his lips as he cracks the can. “maybe.”
you huff, rolling your eyes. “you’re a piece of work already. jesus, accosting me where i can’t say no to you, and then taking one of my beers? you’re ridiculous.”
he doesn’t respond, but instead chooses to smile again at you. “yeah, but i’m hot, so sometimes i can get away with about ninety percent of that.”
“don’t talk yourself up so much. it’s egotistical.”
he takes a sip, smacking his lips. “that may be, but i like t’ go after what i want quickly. i like opportunity, y’know? and ya seemed pretty bored out here, anyway.”
he’s right, you are bored. solo traveling has its perks, but people watching can only get you so far. you hum, bringing your own beer to your lips. the chill and carbonation make you feel a little less nervous with every moment that passes.
“what’s your name?”
“togame. jo togame. you?”
you tell him yours, and he smiles again.
“pretty name for a pretty thing like you.”
well, that was something else. having a man come on so strong to you wasn’t unknown to you, but it felt odd every time it happened. like you were unworthy of such praise and attraction due to, well, you.
he relaxes after that, simply basking in the sunshine next to you, asking questions about where you’re from and why you’re here. you don’t answer him honestly, of course; he seemed fine, but you can never be too careful. he doesn’t chase after more answers, seemingly satisfied with the short responses you’ve given him.
what a weird guy.
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ironically, it had been a long, relaxing day with togame; contrary to popular belief, he was quite charming. and his slight ego interested you deeply, to the point where he’s stood and offered his hand to take you for a walk across the beach.
your legs are warm as you walk beside him. there’s a smile plastered on his face, soft with the edges of his lips slightly upturned, his eyes gentle behind his sunglasses.
“so, what’re ya really here for?”
“what do you mean?” you take a sip of your beer.
he shrugs, placing his hands behind his head and leaning back just a hair, his eyes sliding shut. “dunno. jus’ curious.”
you hum. “curious, huh?”
his hand scratches the back of his head. he looks embarrassed, his eyes darting to you and away, as if he’s scared of what he’s about to say.
“someone like you shouldn’t be alone.”
you can’t tell if it’s sunburn or blush that’s making your face feel hot and red, and you scoff, rolling your eyes. “unfortunately, many people don’t tend to agree with that statement.”
you avoid his gaze. you can feel it sizing you up, but it feels nice. it feels like he cares; a stranger, whose taken you on silly errands of his own within hours of knowing only his name. you’d taken a risk, you know that; you know what could have happened.
but it didn’t. somewhere, some solo traveler god has you in their thoughts. and they’d sent him, with braided black hair and pretty orange sunglasses that do nothing to hide the way he’s eyeing you.
instead, he takes your beer, ignoring your protests as he places it on one of the tables between deck chairs. the look he gives you after fills you with dread. you know what he’s about to do. every neighborhood boy had that same look at every pool party you’d been to, when things got a little too laidback.
“jo, don’t you dare—“
he completely ignores you, choosing instead to pick you up like you weighed nothing. your vision goes awry, the world rolling around in your line of sight as he walks into the water, ignoring the battering of your fists on his back.
then, the cold water hits you, saltiness stinging your tongue and your skin as you gasp, hitting the wet, sandy floor of the shallows with an oof.
after some spluttering, you wipe your face and glare at him from where he’s standing, a few feet off to the side with a horrific grin plastered across his face. he thought it was funny.
let’s see how funny he finds this.
you stand up, clothes sticking to your skin as you shake your head to get the water out. then, you lean down, arms in the water.
he looks at you. “oh, seriously?”
his tone is too teasing to be serious, so you smirk, letting loose a spray of water that slaps him all over, particularly in the face. he staggers, removing his sunglasses as he splutters away, spitting the sand and salt out of his mouth. giggles erupt from your chest as you hold your stomach. you haven’t laughed like this in a long time. a very, very long time.
you ignore the forlorn feeling present there. there’s no time to dwell on those thoughts right now.
you had something right in front of you that could take your mind off of it.
you both play around in the shallows for a long time. so long, that the sun begins to set on the horizon, setting the ocean ablaze in shades of red, yellow and orange. togame’s hand is in your own by then, his chest pressed skintight against your back. you’d slid between his legs on the bench, right between his thighs, making yourself comfortable. your beer is long gone, having been finished hours prior.
you fold your fingers between togame’s, resting your intertwined hands against his thigh. you don’t want to leave, but you know you should. not to mention, you could work up the courage to invite him in by the time you arrived at your hotel if you ask him to accompany you.
“walk me home?”
he nods. “thought ya’d never ask.”
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divider credit: @/cafekitsune networks: @interstellar-inn @themovingcastlez
disclaimer: DO NOT copy or repost my works for any reason. translations are acceptable, but please ask for permission first!
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seonghwaddict · 1 year ago
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tell me — kim hongjoong PART TWO OF LILO'S 600 FOLLOWER EVENT
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requested by @tayisgrt. “I saw this picture [ middle pic in the header ] of Hongjoong and it just got me thinking abt a short smut story abt fem!reader going to a frat party or something and seeing him and finding out that he’s a playboy/fuckboy or the host of the party and they go back to his place and end up having a one night stand or just end up hooking up in the bathroom at the party. Either one works 🤷🏽‍♀️” lilo’s notes. this request is such gold, thank you so my for this tay 🫶 at first i kinda struggled to write but um… yeah i got carried away and the word count turned out to be a lot higher than i. also i am completely aware that the past tense of grind is ground but grinder sounds better to me so deal with my chosen bad grammar (i already uploaded this earlier but i’m pretty sure tumblr flagged it)
prompts. “i’m crazy for you” ; “tell me what you want me to do” ; “i can’t wait to feel you inside me” pairing. kim hongjoong x fem!reader
warnings. smut under the cut, minors please dni, dirty talk, thigh riding, cocky hongjoong, swearing, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it folks), fingering, slight bimbofication, nicknames (baby, baby girl, pretty girl, slut), praise, slight degradation, i missed anything please notify me. wc. 2.7k
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as you danced in in the middle of the overly filled living room with your friends, not a single worry crossed your mind. it had been a while since you’d gone out, wrapped up with school and your part time job, so you were grateful when wooyoung dragged you out of your dorm to go party.
throughout the night, you’d been licking eyes and catching glimpses of a familiar man. and though you couldn’t quite place your finger on why he seemed familiar, his short, bleached hair, alluring smile and sharp eyes hidden behind sunglasses despite how dark the room was had you feeling some type of way.
he didn’t miss the way your eyes roamed over him so desperately, practically begging him to take you. and you certainly didn’t miss the bite of his lip as he leaned against a wall, watching you with a smirk while he sipped from his red solo cup.
as you danced, a pair of hands landed on your waist and slowly slipped down to your hips. you didn’t really care who it was and without much thinking, you backed up against them and swayed your hips to the beat of the song as one hand slid up their chest and around the back of their neck. the person behind you wasn’t too much taller than you, making minimal effort to lean down and ghost his lips over the skin of your neck.
as they bent their face over your neck, tufts of short, bleached hair fanned over your face and you realised who it was, suppressing a shudder of blatant excitement. his lips brushed up to kiss the shell of your ear.
“i’m crazy for you.” he whispered against your ear and you actually shuddered this time, his fingers caressing your hips gently before dipping two centimetres under the waistband of your sparkly skirt and then slipping out again.
you wanted him just as bad but that was embarrassing to admit, so you rolled your hips against him, your ass right against his crotch, as he kissed his way from your ear to your neck. feeling his erection press against your ass moments later, you couldn’t wait much longer. you turned around and pulled his face close enough to whisper against his mouth without your lips touching.
“let’s get out of here?” it was less a question and more of a plea, but he nodded and took your hand to drag you out of the house and to his car.
it was a quick and silent drive, his hand kneading the plump flesh of your thighs did nothing to dissolve the tension or ease the ever-growing puddle in your panties. if anything it made your head spin even more as you body warmed up. some time between when you left the party and got to his house, you finally remembered his name.
hongjoong, member of the hottest fraternity on campus and probably also the host of the party you just escaped from. soon enough the car came to a stop and you tried to get out as calmly as possible to prevent yourself from just ripping off his clothes right then and there.
the walk from his car to his bedroom passed in a haze, both of you rushing on quick feet as he led you there. as soon as the door shut and he locked it, you were all over each other.
teeth clashing through feverish kisses, your hands were quick to undress each other down to your undergarments and grope at each other’s bodies. his hands squeezed your breasts over your bra as he backed you up against the door he just locked despite the bed being two steps away.
you moaned against his mouth as he brushed his thumbs over your nipples and slotted his thigh between your legs simultaneously, his thigh rubbing against your core with every movement. your hands tangled themselves in his hair, pulling him impossibly closer before one of them made its way down. you felt him shiver as you dragged your nails over his torso lightly and stopped on his taut stomach.
you both went still for a moment, not out of uncomfort or anything, just to catch your breaths. your breaths mixed in the sliver of space separating your lips as you got lost in his perceptive eyes. something stirred in you when a mischievous little smile appeared on his lips and for a moment you had a hard time thinking.
“tell me,” he started, a hand trailing up to twirl a lock of your hair around it, “tell me what you want me to do.”
unable to form words with the way he was looking at you, you slid your hand down a bit further to touch what you needed. but before you could get there, a chuckle escaped him and he laid his other hand over yours to stop it.
“words, baby girl.” he muttered lowly, a slight hoarseness to his voice as he tugged the strand gently. “how can i give you what you want if you don’t tell me, hm?”
“i…” you started, unsure of how to ask. nevertheless, he waited patiently. “i want you”
he let out another low chuckle. “be more specific, there’s many things i can do for you.”
you whined before giving in to what he wanted. “i want you to fuck me.”
“hm… you want my cock, huh?”
“god, yes,” you nodded enthusiastically, “want your cock so bad.”
“that’s a very possible request,” his finger slipped out of your hair to cup the front of your neck, thumb rubbing your pulse point. “but first, i’m gonna make you cum on my thigh,” he pressed said thigh against your core once again, “then my fingers,” his fingers tightened ever so slightly, not enough to complicate your breathing but enough to make you see stars for a moment, “and then i’ll fuck you so good i’ll ruin other men for you. how does that sound, pretty girl?”
you merely nodded, momentarily overwhelmed by his words and actions. but as soon as you feel his hands guiding your hips to grind along the length of his thigh, you quickly follow his guidance and move on your own with your hands braced on his shoulder. it wasn’t a hard task, the slick arousal soaking your panties helping you glide on top of him easily, a fact that he took note of with a sound half way between a laugh and a scoff.
“look at you,” he said, leaning forward to catch you in a breathy kiss as you came undone, “you’re already soaked and i haven’t even touched you properly. with all this wetness, i probably won’t even have to stretch you, baby.”
you arched your back off the door as your body flushed with heat and pleasure, a silent whimper escaping your lips. with you positioned like that, he had perfect access for his deft fingers to unclip your lace bra effortlessly. at his gentle “hands, please” you dropped your hands from his shoulder to help him slip the fabric off easier, tossing it in a random direction as you had with your clothes.
his hooded eyes roamed over your naked chest with an almost feral look as a groan slipped through his lips, his hand immediately moving to grope at them, messaging the flesh and rolling your nipples between his fingers. “look at you, so pretty and so bare, all for me.”
he tensed the muscles of his thigh and you slumped forward at the sudden firm sensation, moaning into his shoulder, the movements of your hips never once faltering as you grinded against him harder and faster. at your reaction, he gave your ass an encouraging squeeze and kissed your shoulder, tensing and relaxing that muscle in a rhythm that brought you rushing to your climax.
before you knew it, your back arched as you pressed your clothed clit against his thigh as hard as you could, crying out his name loudly as your orgasm finally hit you, mind devoid of thoughts. three months without sex seemed to have taken its toll on your sensitivity.
“there you go,” he cooed like the asshole he is, a mocking look of sympathy gracing his features. “come all over me like the desperate, needy mess you are.”
when your mind cleared just a bit after your first orgasm of the night, you quickly registered that you weren’t pressed against the door anymore. instead, he had moved you to lay on the bed, your knees bent over the edge as he kneeled between them with his hands caressing your upper thighs. your panties were also no longer on you, discarded amongst the scattered clothing on the ground.
once he noticed that the hazy look in your eyes was gone, one of his hands gently tapped its way to rest on top of your pelvis. “now, tell me, what else did i say i’d make you cum on?”
when you didn’t answer immediately and only blinked at him, he tilted his head. “come on, i know you remember it somewhere in that pretty head of yours, no? or did you fuck yourself dumb on my thigh?”
“y-your fingers…” you finally replied after clearing your throat.
“good girl.” he grinned and nodded, leaning down to peck your cheek. “do you still want to continue?”
“yes, fuck, please.” you were quick to answer in a breathy whine.
he hummed and the mischievous glint was back once again to torment you. “good.”
without wasting any time, he dipped his hand down and through your folds, groaning the the pool of wetness and nearly collapsing on top of you, but he pulled himself together quickly enough for you to not quite register it. either way, you were too busy grasping onto his shoulders and trying not to lose your mind because of how amazing his fingers feel.
as his index finger circled your engorged clit at a frustratingly slow pace, he pressed another kiss to your cheek before moving south. he kissed, sucked and nibbled his way down your jawline, neck and chest, leaving slowly bruising marks in his trails. the pressure of his fingers increased slightly and his kisses circled around your perked nipple before giving it an experimental lick, eyes flicking up to gauge your reaction.
“shit,” you cursed quietly, eyes shut tightly. “k-keep doing that.”
a shit-eating grin replaced the curious look and he did exactly that, licking it twice more before closing his mouth around it and such harshly. this elicited another cry of his name from your lips, your nails digging into his shoulders. they would probably leave marks but he didn’t mind that at all, if anything he’ll wear a tank top tomorrow to show it off.
“tell me what you’re thinking about, pretty girl.” he asked after momentarily lifting his head to look at you, only to find your unfocused eyes already on him.
“i can’t wait to feel you inside me.”
trying to hold himself back from impaling you with his cock, his head moved to give the same attention to your other nipple and he slowly pushed two fingers into your entrance. you let out a choked moan as he dropped his head in the valley of your breasts and groaned deeply.
“fuck…” he sat up to look down at you, eyes glazed over as they roamed from your slack-jawed face down to where his fingers were pushed inside your weeping pussy. “i need to be inside you right fucking now.”
“please, please, please.” at this point you were holding back tears because of how desperate you were to be dicked down but you couldn’t care less, not when he seemed just as desperate.
he looked around his room before his eyes settled on you again, biting his lip with uncertainty. “do we need a condom?”
“are you clean?”
he nodded. “tested a week ago and i haven’t slept with anyone since.”
“well then-“
“actually that’s a lie, i’ve slept with two people since then, not including you.”
you blinked at him.
“but they were both clean. and we used protection!” he was quick to reassure you.
you raised a joking eyebrow before laughing. “it’s fine, i’m clean and on the pill, just go raw.”
he froze for a moment but your words processed soon enough and he made quick work of shucking off his boxers and pumping his length a few times to spread his pre-cum. moments later he was hooking your legs around his, lining himself up with your entrance.
after pressing a quick kiss between your collarbones, he moved forward and began pushing inside you inch by inch. a string of curses left your lips, swollen from being kissed and biting them. hongjoong was a bit bigger than you had anticipated but it was welcome, with the way he was filling you so wonderfully in a way you’d never been filled before you weren’t sure you could think straight. perhaps he was right and was indeed ruining other men for you.
eventually, he bottomed out and neither of you moved for a short while, letting you get used to the stretch. you heard hongjoong groan and curse as he shifted ever so slightly and you felt his length brush against that sweet spot inside you, paired with his pelvic bone pressing against your clit, you let out a needy whine.
“move, please.”
that was all it took for him to pull out and slowly push back in again, setting a steady slow space. your mind, usually filled with so many thoughts, was silent. completely blank except for one thing. him, him, him. hongjoong.
he cooed at you with that same mocking voice from before. “hm, what a cute little slut you are. finally getting the dick your perfect little pussy was begging for. you’ve been thinking about it all night, haven’t you?”
you opened your mouth to reply but instead cut yourself off with a pitchy moan as he angled his hips at just the right angle so his cock dragged along that sweet spot with every one of his thrusts.
“you’re loving this, huh?” he leaned down to rasp into your ear after biting your earlobe gently. “i fuck you so well, don’t i? but let’s not forget how well you take me.”
his pace began picking up and you didn’t care if your moans were too loud, it was his fault for making you feel so damn good. the knot in your stomach tightening once more, an effect of the combination of his actions and his dirty words. but it wasn’t quite enough.
“more, faster, p-please.” you begged him with wide glossy eyes.
there was no reason for him to not comply, so he immediately sped things up, postponing in and out of you as fast as he could. a few more thrust later, your whole body tensed as your second climax caused the knot in your stomach to snap. your body convulsing as you open your mouth to cry out. you were shirt there were scratch marks all over his back and shoulders, but it’s what he deserved for littering your neck and chest with love bites.
hongjoong crashed his lips on yours, bith an attempt to muffle your sounds and to bring you even closer to him. he faintly noted you tasted of mint and some kind of fruit he couldn’t name. though your lipstick was already smudged, his wet kisses against your mouth and his tongue inside only served to smear it even more.
you heard him say something distantly, the intensity of your orgasm had your ears ringing but you faintly recognised the words “cum” and “in you.” it didn’t take a genius to pick up on what he meant, so your fucked-out mind had you nodding. and a second later he did exactly that and collapsed on top of you, his elbows on either side of your head supporting most of his weight.
your chests heaved against each other as he kissed you. though, “kissed” was a bit generous for the lazy, slow presses he left against the plush of your lips, murmuring praises against them. soon enough he slipped out of you and rolled the two of you over so you were laying halfway on top of him as you held each other tightly.
after a long silence he spoke up as he patted your back affectionately. “let’s get you cleaned up?”
“two more minutes.” you muttered into his neck. 
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heart4gyu · 9 months ago
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just for show pt.2 || mc!heeseung x ‪mc‬!reader
PT.1 || PT.3 || note: i honestly didn’t know where i wanted the story to go so let me know your thoughts guys! it rly motivates me when you guys have something to say abt my writing… i think i like it & ofc this definitely leaves room for a pt.3 (lmk ??) hope you guys enjoy tho ^_^!
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the longer you thought about it the more you realized it really wasn’t heeseung’s fault. it wasn’t his fault that everyone did react so well to everything the two of you did. and it wasn’t his fault that you caught yourself falling for his kindness.
you weren’t in love with him or anything, so why was the thought of his possible rejection so… heartbreaking. maybe it was the embarrassment of falling for someone who just wanted to be your friend.
you didn’t know why you felt so conflicted but this was your job and you were going to do your best at it no matter what. when you got home that night, you told yourself that you’d keep your relationship with heeseung professional. even if the friendship that was growing between you was one of the most genuine you’ve had in a while.
the next day, you and your manager were the first to show up from both of your teams. you both sat and talked while you waited, and she mentioned that you and heeseung were invited to host at an upcoming award show.
she told you that you didn’t have to make your decision right away. of course, you told her about what happened so she wanted to make sure you knew the choice was yours. but you both knew that declining the offer with no valid reason wouldn’t look right.
“it’s okay, you can tell them that i accept,” you said, looking down at your hands.
“then congratulations on your first gig as an award show host,” she said, leaning in to place a hand over yours. you looked up and she gave you a cheerful nod.
“well we don’t know if it’s certain yet,” you replied with a small chuckle, still nodding back as a thanks.
“no it is, heeseung accepted right away yesterday,” she said, raising her eyebrows at you, making you roll your eyes at her.
“thanks for keeping it professional,” you said, and you both shared a laugh before the conversation, thankfully, switched to another topic.
after some time had passed, you decided to grab something to eat from the breakfast table that was set for the mcs and artists. you filled up a small bowl with some fruits and a small croissant.
“y/n?” you heard from behind you. you knew that voice well, so you took a deep breath before responding.
“good morning, heeseung,” you replied, suddenly very interested in which fork you should choose.
“uh… would you like a drink? we picked some up at the cafe on the way here,” he offered, with only one cup in his hand. you looked down at it then back up at him.
“oh that’s nice of you but i don’t really like coffee,” you said, trying to move around him but he stepped in front of you again.
“i- i know you don’t. it’s tea actually, the way you ordered it last time,” he said abruptly, a slight blush appearing high on his cheeks.
you let out a small sigh as you took the cup in your empty hand and he gave you a small smile. he almost looked relieved as he took a small step back. he didn’t move more than that though and he looked like he wanted to say more. the silence was beginning to get a bit too awkward for you though.
“thank you. uh… i’ll go first then,” you said, returning the small smile. you brushed past him lightly but you could feel him watching you all the way out of the room. your face felt like it was on fire by the time you stepped into the dressing room.
how could you even think about getting over your feelings when he made you react like this? he only looked at you, you barely brushed past him, he remembered your drink order… but that didn’t mean anything. maybe his manager wrote it down or something.
you forced yourself to forget about it as your team did your hair and makeup. you usually sat by heeseung for this part but when he came in you were already finished and making your way to put your interview outfit on.
heeseung knew you were avoiding him. the next time he saw you you were already on the set reading over your lines, which you usually did in the dressing room together.
“hey, y/n, can we talk for a second?” he asked as he approached the small stage.
“i think we’ll be getting started any moment now so… maybe later,” you said, knowing you’d be leaving the second your segments were recorded.
a minute passed before the director walked in and started giving orders to everyone. then the lights and cameras were on, mics were being handed out, and you both were putting on the perfect show that everyone loved.
you smiled and laughed at heeseung the way you always did. for a second he forgot that you no longer wanted anything to do with him. he found himself paying attention to every single movement you made. the way you placed your hand on his arm, the way your cheeks rose when he made a joke, how your eyes sparkled under the bright lights as you watched him talk.
he wasn’t sure why your conversation the other day bothered him so much. he wanted to clear up the confusion more than anything but he didn’t know what that was in the first place. why were you suddenly so upset at him? the reason didn’t matter just the thought of you being hurt by him made him so mad at himself.
he was pulled out of his thoughts when a couple of the lights turned off and the director was making the call for a break. when he looked back down to where you were stood beside him you were already gone. he needed to talk to you. it’s all that he could think about since the other day.
you had ran off to the dressing room to touch up your own makeup. well, really you just wanted any excuse to be on your own and away from heeseung of course. but as if you summoned him yourself, there he was walking through the door.
“oh, there you are,” he said, his eyes lighting up when they came in contact with yours in the mirror. you didn’t say anything just finished applying some gloss to your lips. you quickly tried to make your way out of the room but he stood blocking the door.
“can we talk, please?” he asked. you took a step back when you looked up and his eyes were doing all the begging for him. then took another step back when he moved closer, eyes still not breaking away from yours.
“there’s nothing to talk about, heeseung,” you said, shaking your head and looking anywhere but his eyes. before you knew it he had walked you all the way back to the vanity. you let out a gasp as the makeup shook from how abruptly you hit the table.
“then why are you avoiding me?” he said, head leaned down to try and look you in the eyes. as if the answers he searched for would be found in them.
“i’m not! and we were great on the show like always so there’s no problem,” you replied, wanting nothing more than to be out of this room.
“i’m not stupid and you know that’s not what i meant,” he said, speaking quieter the closer he got to you. your bodies weren’t touching but the proximity still made you feel like you couldn’t breathe. “just tell me what i did wrong.”
“you didn’t do anything wrong! and there’s no more discussion! so let’s just go back out there and do exactly what we were doing before,“ you replied, finally gaining some confidence and looking up to meet his gaze. “everything is for the audience, for the show anyway.”
he looked you in your eyes, so intensely you wanted so badly to break the eye contact but you couldn’t let yourself back down now. the corner of his lip lifted so slightly you almost missed it and he looked down to see your hand gripping the edge of the table.
“everything just for the show,” he said, but you couldn’t tell if he was asking. he leaned just a bit closer as he placed his hands behind yours on the table, your noses practically touching now.
it took everything in you to not let your chest rise and fall so obviously hard and for you not to close the gap despite the tension that you knew he could feel too. why was he doing this? you couldn’t let him win. something switched in your mind now because all you wanted was for him to feel what you felt.
“just like you said,” you replied, placing a hand on his chest to hold him in place. you raised your head and your lips were so close it felt like they were magnets attracted to each other. but you didn’t move any closer, all you did was stare up into his eyes. you shifted your eyes down from his eyes to his lips once… twice… then you felt it.
you could feel his heart beating hard and fast in his chest, and that’s all you needed. all you wanted to know before you pushed him away. he let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding in, as he took a step back of his own.
“our break is over soon. why don’t we save some of the theatrics for the cameras,” you said, as you walked away knowing you successfully gave him a taste of his own medicine. he wasn’t the only that could make someone fall for him.
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kuntniss · 2 years ago
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hmm i think denying will’s jealousy in both st3 and st4 is erasing an important part abt his love for mike and who he is, esp with how it’s different both seasons. because it’s often associated with homophobes trying to act like will was evil for being jealous and a little upset w/ his friends, so it’s dismissed overall but like. okay. ignore them for once. in season three, it’s still a more childish thing—which yea ofc it is. he’s a kid. he wants to cherish that time and his friends. he feels left behind (he IS left behind) but this is also the first time he sees mike with someone else, somewhat of the way he was with will. and it isn’t like will was planning on making mike his boyfriend, but he assumed they’d just stay closer than everyone forever. he wants them to love each other but he wasn’t expecting some love declaration, it would just be their thing. and that’s another part of what upsets him—besides him feeling so invisible and stuck in the past, he’s mad because he expected so much. hence him calling himself stupid while looking at that picture. it was almost like it was foolish for him to even feel jealous, for him to want to be noticed again. i wouldn’t necessarily call it selfish because that isn’t will, but it isn’t like it is in season four. it’s not as resigned. and it comes from a place of sadness and anger and so much fucking hope that it’s embarrassing for him. but then in season four, he really only gets annoyed that day at rink o mania, specifically that talk with el while mike gets his socks. this is also right after that wack airport hug, so he’s upset with both mike AND el. and guess what? the jealousy is more of an i’m disappointed and i’m upset and i can’t believe this is what’s happening when it was supposed to be good. like how it was in the summer. and then other times when he seems to be jealous (mike walking up to give el her eggos), it’s quiet, it’s less obvious, it’s more yearning. even when el’s brought up in a lot of conversations, he doesn’t get mad. if it was st3, he would’ve rolled his eyes, he wouldn’t have wanted to engage in the conversation. he’s tired and he’s trying to grow up. and then again right before the byers brother™️ talk, he’s looking over at mike and el and again, it’s that quietness, that sadness, that loneliness. literal hours after he lies about the painting and resigns himself to a life of this silence, this secret. he’s exhausted and just doesn’t expect things to ever be the same. it’s still jealousy, nonetheless. the script confirms it, yes, but it’s not even that hard to realize. people just do it wrong. and jealousy isn’t always bitter or angry, will rarely is. it stems from this love he’s had since he can remember and this pathetic-ness he’s felt many times, but never because of mike. until things change (ahem. one summer can change everything or whatever it was) and mike was the one aspect of his life he didn’t expect to change!!! the contrast between his st3 jealousy and st4 jealousy is so insane and tragic but beautiful because you know he loves mike so much but he doesn’t want to fight for him or with him.
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viquipo · 5 months ago
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No bc I'm so mad rn I usually post my rants on ig stories but I need the tumblrites to tell me if I'm crazy or what. Jwcc/ct spoilers WHATEVER
First of all I want to preface this by saying that this is just my opinion on the matter, I'm not saying your headcanons are "wrong" or whatever tf, it's a kids cartoon where they unironically use terms like "fam". You can play with the characters however you'd like.
That being said, this is why TO ME it does not makes sense for Ben to be anything other than gay. Again, if you think he's bi or straight or anything else that's cool. I'm also leaning towards the opinion that he does actually have a girlfriend. I don't think the shows gonna pull a 180 on it because, realistically, 2 queer characters is already a lot for a DreamWorks kids show. As much as I'd like it not to be.
But, since the beginning, Ben has been very clearly coded as exclusively into men to me. Before finally going into it, I remind everyone on here that I'm a lesbian. I have felt an affinity with his character specifically for the experience of only liking the same gender. I might be totally projecting.
Ok, so.
1. The arc Ben goes through during the show is yes, one of self discovery, but also one of self acceptance. He changes a lot from the start of s1, but he also comes to terms with stuff himself or other people didn't like about him. He doesn't throw the dork pouch away or tells Kenji to keep it, the first thing he does when he takes it back from Kenji is put on hand sanitizer. He is covered in dirt, he's not afraid of filth anymore, but he still does that action because it's part of who he is as a person. He also becomes very unashamed at the things he does. He went from being embarrassed of his carob bars to eating grubs in front of people who he knows think it's gross. He knows himself as he is and he accepts it. To me (and to lots of other people) this works very well as a gay metaphor, and pairs up pretty nicely with the whole "jungle boy? Jungle MAN" arc being a trans metaphor. But how does this make Ben uniquely into men?
Well, it doesn't. But I think this next one does.
2. Enter Yasmina. She's pretty, she's smart, athletic, funny, all that good stuff. I'm not saying that means every wlm character should automatically be into her, but it certainly helps. Now forgive me if I don't remember specific episodes/seasons, but we all remember that episode where Ben convinces himself that Yaz is in love with him for some reason. When he "rejects" her, he says : "I'm just now starting to find myself". That's cool, cause I'm pretty sure Ben's " finding himself " personality wise was over and done a couple of seasons ago. To me, that is a really good hint at him dealing with his gayness.
3. He's also the first person Yasmina talks to about her feelings for Sammy. Now, in this particular context, the options for Yaz to talk to were Darius, Brooklynn, or Ben. It would initially seem to make more sense for her to confide in Brooklynn, since the two of them are far closer than her and Ben, and it also wouldn't be the first time she brings up Sammy as a romantic interest for Yaz (see: everyone tweaking abt that one line back in like s2). So why does Yasmina, a very private and reserved person, choose Ben to talk to about her same sex crush? She has probably gathered from the previous conversation that Ben relates to her struggle in a unique way in which Brooklynn just can't. Ben seems very receptive of what Yaz is saying ("feelings, am I right?") and it seems like he REALLY gets where she's coming from.
4. This is one I don't see talked about a lot, and maybe it's just cause I'm too out of the loop with the fandom, but I want to examine it as well. It's when Ben decides to not actually stay on the island. Everyone (except Sammy) already knew he wasn't going to stay in the end, but still didn't force him out. I think this is especially clear in a line Darius says when they reunite on the boat that goes something like "you needed to figure it out on your own" *smile hand on shoulder combo*. No explanation needed I think
I am diagnosed with autism did you guys know what
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senbbonzakura · 7 months ago
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hii!! don't be shy posting anythin, that's cool when new people appear who write south park stuff! 🤍 can i request (f!reader) picnic headcannons with kenny, stanley and kyle? it can be platonic or romantic(sure, aged up), idc
sure!! thank u sm for being my first headcannons req anon !! 🤍 ill try my best with these bc i never was on a picnic so i have to use my imagination on how it works.. also i made this romantic, theyre like 17-18 here
⋆ PICNIC WITH MAIN 3 :
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✩ — STAN !
this guy was so flattered when u asked him to go do a picnic with u
he was so excited he couldnt sleep
brought cookies and dr pepper...
its because he was walking around the store for like 30 minutes in denial of what would you like to eat 😭😭
like.. will u like it? what if youre picky? mostly everyone likes cookies so cookies it is
butttttt he brought money to the picnic too in case you need something
he picks a nice outfit for himself!!
and by that i dont mean a suit or anything like that... its just a tee that you once said you liked and his fav baggy jeans
so nervous before meeting u for the picnic. mostly bc of the food. what if youre not happy with the food he brought☹️
he brought a picnic blanket too tho!!
he tries to settle it himself but its sort of windy and he drops the blanket...
it flies away
but dw luckily he got it!!
he tries to settle it ahain but DONT trust him with that bc its gonna fly away again so help him pls😭
once its all settled he tries to make it romantic somehow?? he doesnt know how to be romantic without it being corny tho😕
so he just passes u everything u ask for!!
totally did not put the picnic basket next to himself on purpose..
with stan its mostly just giggles and stuff. he will hold your hand or hug you there and there but he enjoys just talking with you like he would with a best friend, if you know what i mean??
he kisses your cheek and thanks you for all the effort you put in everything <3
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✩ — KYLE !
he suggests the picnic 🤗
kyle is the most organized one of them all
before the picnic he knows what to bring and what food you like
like what??? how did he know that?? did he put cameras around ur house or smth
or maybe ur parents just like him a lot so they told him stuff..
keeps checking if he has everything
he also brings you a flower!!
hes a gentleman😭
somehow manages to settle the blanket himself??
he also picked the perfect time of the day so it would be sunset
puts sm effort in to show you how much he loves you!! hes so sweet
brought like a backup hoodie for you just in case youre cold😕
he doesn't really like touching you in public, so expect a hug and a kiss from him only after it gets darker after the sunset
or if he thinks no one is watching
ike definitely wanted to go with you two
kyle said no
he wants it to be a moment just for you and him
ike still comes along with sheila "on accident" but for like a few minutes bc kyle begged them to leave you two alone😭
HE WAS SO EMBARRASSED THAT HIS MOM CAME TOO💔
he apologizes to you
its not like hes embarrassed bc of sheila, its just the fact that his MOM came, if u get what i mean
what more can i say?
besides that its all perfect !!
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✩ — KENNY !
you suggest the picnic
he thought abt it before and wanted to ask you too but money... 😕
he immediately said yes and saved money just for that occasion
he knows what food u like
its because usually when you two hang out he randomly asks you stuff like "whats your fav food?" in that case
and he remembers every answer u give him🤗🤗
he brought food and you brought the blanket
he actually made sure to bring enough for the two of you
thats so sweet😕
he doesnt gaf abt public, he will show his love to you everywhere
so he has his arm wrapped around you most of the time
and also kisses your shoulder or cheek sometimes !!
he would do the rizz thing with "hey you have something there" while pointing at ur chest and then he would grab ur chin so u look at him and he kisses u
its just a joke tho😭
thats not a great way to flirt in his opinion
he would also chuckle before kissing u !!
sweeeeeeeet
after the picnic he offers to walk you to your home <3
he also holds your hand while walking
when youre about to leave he hugs you and thanks you for everything too🤗
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fill my requests up guys!!
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reivrze · 2 years ago
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Hii!
So maybe crush en- when them and their crush kiss but then their crush gets distant (what it is is that their crush is nervous abt the new feelings ofc) like highschool au. But if you want you can make it like the last one where’s it’s a Niki imagine that’s enemies to lovers idk lol
a/n : i apologize for the wait, i wanted to work on my series so i didn't do many requests but i hope you like this ! also i decided to leave a few of these as a cliff hanger to add suspense hehe 😈 also i didn't really commit to the highschool au thing sorry, but i wanted to make the scenarios vary, and the highschool au is restricting
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pairing : crush!enha x gn!reader genre : fluff, angst warning : cursing ( ? ), probably the longest reaction i've ever written, didn't proof read lmao sorry
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l. heeseung . ⁺
you guys had kiss during a truth or dare game amongst friends, your friends had been the one that dared you to kiss him as they knew you had the biggest crush on him since first grade. sure this wasn't how you had wanted your first kiss with him to go like but you were sure as hell not going to let this opportunity slip from you.
you had avoided heeseung for the rest of the night, feeling embarrassed from the earlier kiss between you two. you had been scared that if he could talk to you alone for two second that he'd tell you that the kiss was purely platonic and he had just complied because it was a dare.
what you didn't know what that he had been looking for you while you were hiding away from you. you didn't see how his cheeks turned pink the second your lips made contact with his. you didn't catch the way his hands flinched at your proximity, oh how he wanted to pull you closer to him and it killed him to keep his hands to himself. you didn't notice how his eyes saddened when he felt the warmth of your lips leave him. if only you knew all the things you missed.
p. jongseong . ⁺
jay had invited you to the studio, he had been working on a song for past month and wanted you to help him review it. you guys spent the night going over his work, not even noticing how tipsy you were getting from the wine you had been sipping together for over a few hours.
as the alcohol made its way through your veins, you head started feeling dizzy and your lids heavy, feeling tired, you laid your head on jay's shoulder. you looked up from underneath him, staring at his strong jaw, straight nose, beautiful eyes, and his oh-so soft looking lips. not really thinking much of it, your hand made its way to jay's cheek and turning his face down towards you. for once, you took a risk ad you brought his lips down to yours.
jay, not wanting to kiss you while you were intoxicated, pulled you away from him gently. realizing what you had just done, you panicked, profusely apologizing while slurring your words and pushing yourself back up ready to leave. jay didn't want you to ge the wrong message as he quickly stood up, helping you get steady,
"hey hey, love, you don't have to apologize, i want to kiss oyu but i want it to be when you'll remember it, not when you're drunk"
i struggled with that last line of dialogue, it doesn't sound as good as i wished it to be
s. jaeyun . ⁺
jake and you were engrossed in a friendly game of Twister. the colorful mat sprawled out on the floor, and your bodies twisted and contorted in an attempt to follow the game's instructions. laughter filled the room as you struggled to maintain your balance, your limbs tangled.
as the game progressed and trying to keep your balance got increasingly difficult, one misstep caused you to fall down, right on top jake, ultimately making him fall as well. for a moment, time stilled as the realization that your lips were against one another's sank into both of you, you body reacting quickly after, as you lifted your self off him, stammering apology after apology.
jake, however, had a different response, ignoring the words coming out of you as he snaked his hand around your waist, bring you back down, reconnecting your lips.
p. sunghoon . ⁺
you and sunghoon found yourselves in the middle of a heated argument. your voices grew louder, each trying to prove your point. as the tension escalated, you couldn't help but notice sunghoon's lips, mesmerized by their shape and the way they moved when he spoke. it was distracting, to say the least.
lost in your thoughts, your attention wandered from the argument, and without thinking, you leaned forward, capturing sunghoon's lips in an unexpected kiss. time seemed to stand still as your lips met, momentarily silencing the escalating argument. your action caught sunghoon off guard, and he blinked in surprise before quickly reciprocating the kiss, his lips molding with yours.
feeling a mix of embarrassment and excitement, you pulled away slightly, your cheeks turning a shade of crimson. but before you could apologize or explain yourself, sunghoon reached out and gently pulled you back in, deepening the kiss. in that moment, he whispered against your lips,
"this does not mean you won the argument."
the unexpected passion of the kiss lingered in the air as you finally broke apart, your eyes locked for a brief moment. both you and sunghoon were left speechless, your argument momentarily forgotten amidst the charged atmosphere. tt was clear that the kiss had stirred something within both of you, a connection that went beyond your disagreement.
k. sunoo . ⁺
the room was filled with tension as sunoo sat on the couch, listening intently to you pouring out your stress and anxiety over your upcoming finals. you could feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, you voice quivering and tears welling up in your eyes. the pressure had become too much, and you couldn't hold it back any longer.
"I just… I don't know what to do anymore," you managed to say between sobs, your vulnerability shining through your words.
sunoo's heart ached seeing you like this, feeling the depth of your pain. without hesitation, he moved closer, his warm presence offering solace. he reached out and gently wiped away your tears with his thumb, offering a comforting smile.
"hey, it's okay," he whispered softly. "you don't have to face this alone. I'm here for you."
as his words washed over you, a mix of emotions swirled within you. the rawness of the moment, coupled with the care he displayed, brought you closer to him. in that instant, you closed the gap between you and pressed your lips against his, seeking solace and connection amidst the chaos.
immediately realizing what you had done, you pulled away abruptly, your cheeks flushed with embarrassment and regret. "I'm so sorry," you stammered, your voice barely audible. "I shouldn't have done that.
sunoo's eyes sparkled with a mix of amusement and affection. he pulled you back into his embrace, holding you gently but firmly. with a lighthearted tone and a soft chuckle, he reassured you,
"you know, I'll always be here to listen to your worries, no matter how big or small. and as for the kissing part, let's save that for better conditions. maybe when you're not feeling so overwhelmed with finals stress."
y. jungwon . ⁺
you and jungwon found yourselves attending a lively new year's party, surrounded by friends and shimmering decorations. the air was filled with anticipation as the countdown to midnight approached. as the clock's hands neared 12, you couldn't help but steal glances at jungwon. you had been friends for a while, but lately, your feelings had blossomed into something more. your heart raced with nervous excitement, unsure of how jungwon felt.
when the moment finally arrived, the room erupted in cheers, and all eyes turned toward the large clock hanging on the wall. you couldn't resist stealing one last glance at jungwon, your eyes locking just as the clock struck 12.
in that instant, an impulsive surge of courage overcame you. you leaned in and pressed your lips against jungwon's, sharing a brief but electrifying kiss. immediately pulling back, your cheeks flushed with a mix of embarrassment and excitement. "I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over me," you stammered.
to your surprise, instead of being taken aback, jungwon burst into a warm laughter. he gently took your hand in his and brought it to his lips, pressing a tender kiss on your knuckles. "what a cute and romantic way to ask me to be your boyfriend," he said, his voice filled with affectionate amusement.
n. riki . ⁺
you and niki had been diligently practicing a beautiful and romantic choreography for the end-of-year showcase. the dance was filled with intricate movements and delicate touches that reflected your deep connection. as the music swelled to its crescendo, you found yourselves in the final position, your bodies intertwined and faces mere inches apart.
lost in the intensity of the moment, your heart raced, overwhelmed by the electric energy between you. without thinking, you leaned in and pressed your lips against niki's. realizing what had just happened, you quickly pulled away, your face flushed with surprise and embarrassment.
"m-my apologies," you stammered, your voice barely audible as you hastily gathered your things and dashed out of the practice room, desperately needing a moment alone to process the unexpected kiss. but you didn't get far before niki caught up to you, his footsteps echoing behind. gasping for breath, you turned around to face him, your eyes wide with trepidation. before you could utter a single word, niki reached out and gently took hold of your trembling hand.
"hey, you didn't give me time to say something.." he breathed out, slightly amused at the whole situation.
"i wanted to ask you if you'd like to grab coffee sometime? get to know each other outside of dance practice, you know?"
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© miyu 2023 - do not copy, translate, repost or plagiarise my work anywhere !
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hijackalx · 1 year ago
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ASTARION SFW HEADCANONS:
yall he would be so embarrassed by how vampires are portrayed in the media. like enraged 😭😭 he feels like they make him look like a joke and would refuse to watch/read anything with vampires in it bcz nobody ever gets it right. but if modern day tav DID ever get him to watch twilight with them he would be like shrinking into his shirt from secondhand embarrassment AT FIRST but i feel like he would eventually get invested LMAO like u know how dads stand in front of the tv and get stuck there bcz theyre too interested lol that kind of vibe
sooo hedonistic and materialistic like he loves all things luxurious, chocolates, expensive fabrics, comfortable furniture etc. he does NOT want to settle for anything less. but this also means he expects the same for tav 🥰 but he's kind of messy too? like it makes sense with being materialistic bcz eventually youll have lots of clutter. his tent has all kinds of unnecessary shit
hes lowkey sentimental. LOWKEY THOUGH he would never admit it. like if tav ever gave him something like idk, a necklace they found or something and said it made them think of him he'd literally keep it forever and ever. dont call him out on it tho bcz he'll get defensive af 😔 HES SUCH A BABY
tav and him will argue A LOT but thats because he purposely pushes ppls buttons. (nsfw mention) its like foreplay to him and if u read the nsfw section youll see why lol
so sooooo jealous but only if he feels like youre getting too close to someone else. like initially i dont think tav sleeping with someone else makes him jealous bcz of his backstory like he doesnt rlly view sex as something that only happens between two ppl that love each other and thats what would bother him the most. and i think hes only open sexually bcz hes conditioned himself to be that way, like maybe after a while of being with tav it really would start to bother him if they were sleeping with other ppl and he'd eventually want to be exclusive.
also he cares abt tav so much. like he pretends like he doesnt but if they freak him out enough theyll see just how much he worries abt them and wants them safe 😭❤️
love language:
giving = words of affirmation. he loves to call tav pet names and comment on how good they are at things and how good they look etc. he LOVESSS it especially if tav responds to it in any way (physically or verbally) bcz he also loves to tease lol. also dare i say physical touch? like just innocently touching tav all the time. this i feel bcz he (spoiler???) rlly enjoyed the hug during his confession scene and also wants to hold tav's hand after. (end of possible spoiler) like he'll prolly do little things like rub tav's back or caress their face randomly while theyre talking to him lol all very sensual tho hes a very sensual man
receiving = words of affirmation and physical touch lol both in the way i described before. i dont think he would like tav teasing him tho most of the time he gets genuinely pissed off 😹😹😹 hes just a lil short tempered
apparently hes 5'9 but i dont know where thats coming from lol i dont get that vibe he looks pretty lanky i would say between 5'11-6' is more realistic like lets be honest a 5'9 man lured back all those victims for cazador? be so fucking for real 😭😭 also decent muscle tone not scrawny but not SWOLE
ASTARION NSFW HEADCANONS:
lets go girls and gays 👯 for starters i dont really see him enjoying being submissive at all like u had to roll a 15 to even get the mf to say 'please'. i think this is especially because he hates having his autonomy taken away from him but he has a controlling personality in general (he was deciding ppls fates as a magistrate before cazador 🧍🏼like HELLO what the fuck was that 😹😹) . he likes to call the shots BUT i dont think hes selfish (kinda feel like hes a giver lowkey?? are we feeling the service dom allegations ??) he just withholds what tav likes until they do what he wants or theyre good for him. he always remembers to reward them tho 😇
he LOVES BRATS (hence the arguing mentioned before) !!!!!!! theyre his absolute favorite like theres something abt putting someone in their place that turns him on so much. theyre also so fun. he usually does it by being mean and degrading them tho lol. but once they submit to him hes so soo sweet. theyll also get bonus points for calling him something that implies hes above them (daddy, sir, master) but he wont make them. he prolly likes to see if he can make them do it voluntarily for an ego boost lol.
hes sadistic in the sense that he likes to “hurt” tav but not in extreme ways. he likes them too much for that. like he'll pull their hair and choke them (bite them) or something but he wont cause them horrific pain if u catch my drift. i still feel like hes into seeing them cry tho lol like if they go to him for a shoulder to cry on he'll try to act sympathetic but he'll also pop a boner HELP HES THE WORST
takes forever to cum like bro 🙄 I GOT RUG BURN ON MY PUSSY !!!! also has a very attractive pp probably 6-7 inches? like its textbook perfect. upwards curve. pink tip. shall i go on.
he wont do this to a one night stand but if he likes tav enough he'll want to mark or claim them in some way. like leaving bite marks and bruises EVERYWHERE or even cumming inside them.
also not as kinky as u would think like keep ur questionable kinks away from this man he will judge so hard. MAJOR kink shamer. in short no u cannot piss on him lmao leave peepaw alone
aftercare with him depends. at first its rlly cold and u get corny rehearsed lines and he cant wait to go sleep by himself 😭😭😭 BUT after he catches feelings hes very attentive and will help tav clean up. also will prefer to stay with them until morning.
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