#I wanna fuck with him so bad

[nat-seal-well]

Milo’s fear of anything paranormal will never not be funny to me

[puppyeared]

littlest furth shop

@laikascomet

[edwinisms]

george rexstrew deserves awards for many things but i have to say. edwin’s bloodcurdling scream as niko gets killed deserves a whole award unto itself. like. that scream did not feel at all like a tv show scream. to a somewhat jarring degree. and i can’t express how much I respect that

[fairy-bard]

i’ve been loving watching critical role recently if for no other reason than because i get to watch a decent portion of viewers actively falling for cult tactics lmao

a forbes article describes cult tactics as when cult leaders ��censor dissenting viewpoints, promote a distorted narrative and use relentless repetition and peer pressure”

ludinus needing to monologue at everyone he meets. cherry picking what information to let people know (ie the orb). showing popular world leaders (gods?) at their absolute worst as a means to win over the vulnerable. creating dissent between cult prospects and the people who they’re close to outside the cult. doesn’t take no for an answer. repeating his points over and over, in whatever context he thinks will be most persuasive. targeting people who’ve lost everything. convincing people that they’re special

matt is a genius.

[scarlett-or-wtv]

Omfg its the way i would kiss on it lick on it touch on fuck on it spit on it suck on it and everything else i can do with it.

[fluffylino]

hyunjin uses your mouth!!!

(i wrote this cuz i saw this edit and now i will literally do anything to get on my knees and give him the best head-)

-contains mature themes

"yeah, you just love my cock don't you" hyunjin grunted out. watching as you took his length into your mouth. hands pumping his base.

"i could fill any of your holes and you'd be more than happy"

"my cock makes you dumb, doesn't it?"

you moaned, gagging as he bucked his hips upwards. he hadn't even got out of his performance clothes. pushing you down onto your knees to suck him off.

high on adrenaline. that kind of ego boost that hits different. because he's just so full of himself.

he knows he's hot.

he's sexy.

you kissed his tip, sticking your tongue out to tease him. laying kitten like licks on his weeping head.

"how about a challenge, my dumb baby" your eyes widened as you made sure to pay full attention to him. if not you'd probably end up punished.

"make daddy cum with just your mouth"

but that is what you were doing. you raised your hand to stroke him. jumping when he swatted your hand away.

"no hands. only that pretty mouth of yours"

an invisible rope binding your wrists together behind your back. you inched closer, his length standing tall and proud as you eyed it.

thinking of all the ways you could bring him to his climax.

you stood up on your knees. mouthing at him. he cursed under his breath. fingers tangled in your hair.

"keep going"

and so you did. practically choking on his dick as he pushed your head down. it was frustrating. you wanted to use your hands. and your jaw ached.

"f-fuck my mouth, daddy" you garbled out, letting your jaw fall slack.

there was a moment of hesitation until he thrusted up into your mouth. your throat spasming around him as your gag reflex hit.

"such a fucking needy whore"

your tongue hanging out as he used your mouth. fucking it like it was your cunt. your spit dripping out, making him wetter. the slide becoming easier.

you cringed at the how filthy it sounded. your choked out cries and gagging. his loud moans.

the squelching. the mess on your face and his pants.

"you'll take my cum like the slut that you are, won't you" he panted out, opening his eyes to focus on you.

you nodded. desperate to taste him. to have his cum in you.

"w-want it, p-please daddy"

"I know baby. don't waste a single drop or else" hyunjin muttered, using your mouth as a fleshlight. not caring if he was getting noisier.

you moaned out at the taste. the feeling of his warm cum filling up your mouth. threatening to spill out as he lazily thrusted.

and when he did pull out, you made sure to swallow. proudly keeping your mouth open for him to see.

.

.

he is best boy.

[saetoshis]

FUUUCKKKKKKK

[bunnyboy-juice]

NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???

[justagirlobsessedwithwizards]

you can’t tell me that theodore nott wouldn’t whimper in bed. and trust me, he is LOUD.

he’s not afraid of anybody hearing him because he would take such pride in everyone knowing you make him feel that good.

and don’t even get me started on you riding him.

he’d have such a tight grip on your hips, no doubt leaving bruises for the next few days. his eyes rolled back as he lets out the loudest whimper.

“fuck baby.. you-ah-make me feel so fucking good..” “that’s it, just like that pretty girl” “come on, show me how bad you need to cum”

and if you start dirty talking back? he can’t even think straight, his mind all fuzzy as he sees stars. he LOVES being praised.

“you like this, pretty boy? like maki ng me feel good?” “that’s it, letting me use you so nicely”

his whimpers are sometimes so quiet you can barely hear them, and he burries his face into your neck, whimpering in your ear.

(i wanna make him feel good 😣)

[s0fter-sin]

soap's whole deal being sniper and demolitions gets me going bc on the surface they sound so different but when you get into it, you realise it's bc soap's smart

sniping is all math; calculating distances and wind interference and bullet drop. something i think people overlook is he was listed as a sniper first so it can be implied that he's better at it than demolitions. he does more sniping in both campaigns than demolitions work; in capture or kill, ghost specifically calls on him to take down the aq snipers

and demolitions is math with a hit of chemistry; knowing what mixes with what, knowing how much to use, recognising environmental factors and adjusting accordingly. it's not just about the boom; so much work goes into contained/ planned explosions. especially when having enough power for a breacher charge and not bringing down the whole building is the difference between mission success and failure

the chemical bombs he makes in alone can't just be any old cleaners, they have to have the correct reaction to each other; he just knew off the top of his head what would mix with what to create what reaction. he would also potentially have to recognise them by sight/smell bc they would’ve been written in spanish

soap would also have to know architecture; recognising structural integrity and weak points so he knows exactly where to plant a charge to bring it down and how it'll come down

he has an incredible soldier's mind people just forget that bc he's sociable which itself is a skill

we know he tends to buck against orders he doesn't agree with like when he pushes back against ghost in capture or kill and shepherd when he tells them to release hassan

he gets closer to people and sees if he can trust them and that's when he follows them without question. really think about how he talks to alejandro and rudy; he asks about their home and alejandro's family and rudy's relationship with him. those aren't questions you ask a stranger after a few hours of knowing them. that's not even touching on his relationship with ghost

he also deliberately brings people of higher ranks down to his level; talking informally with ghost and giving him a shoulder punch, addressing alejandro (a colonel!!) by his first name and rudy by his nickname despite literally just meeting them. he personalises all of them and it’s in direct opposition to the reason most characters do that; it’s not due to insubordination or lack of respect, the more he respects and trusts someone, the more casual he is with them

he digs into people; he wants to know what makes them tick and that determines if he can one, trust them and two, follow their orders. once he decides that, he's the ultimate soldier; he bleeds loyalty which makes him vicious when that loyalty is taken for granted

he isn't naive or bubbly or insecure; he's an incredibly smart and aware soldier. he's aggressive and bloodthirsty and loyal and intuitive and i love him so much

[dizzybizz]

ms jay herself (and apple)

[mossyivy]

Ugh…Death Island Leon has been on my mind all day…I just can’t get over that old man!!

Imagine waking up early, standing in the kitchen wearing those teeny tiny nightgowns, flipping pancakes, all while you and Leon’s kid(s) is sleeping in bed peacefully. The early morning birds chirping, bright sunrise creeping in through the windows.

You’d be softly humming to yourself, sizzling echoing throughout the kitchen as you flip a silly little heart shaped pancake. Suddenly feeling those strong, burley, yet familiar arms wrap around your waist, one coming up by your shoulder.

Gentle kisses being pressed up against the nape of your neck, rough hand squeezing and massaging your hip. Needy mumbles coming from his tired lips, talking about going back to bed for something ‘quick’ while the kid(s) sleep. Those black sweatpants hanging from his hips, showing that prominent “V” line of his, happy trail hiding beneath the cloth.

God…Why can’t I get that man out of my head! 😣

- Anon! 🎀

My god... You have no idea how fucking badly I want that 38 year old man to annihilate me 🎀anon...

Just imagine him clinging onto you like you'll vanish if he let's you go. He always says it'll be quick but it's never quick with Leon. Not when he's in one of his moods. He'll just keep kissing your neck, eventually start nibbling at your skin. Soft little pleases and you know you want to.

Eventually he'll realize you're finally listening to the voice of reason (his morning wood pressing into your ass) and look at the stove clock with a smirk, knowing the kid(s) won't beup for at least another half hour. Leaning into your ear and he whispers seductively y'know, we don't even need to leave the kitchen, you'd look great up on the counter.

To which you grip the spatula a little tighter, trying desperately to cling to the tiny shred of resolve you still have. That's when you feel his hands glide down your thighs and under the tiny nightgown. His rough hands gliding his calloused hands over your soft belly and he feels you finally lean back into him as he playfully pulls at the waistband of your underwear with his thumb. He can't help but smirk, feeling cocky about winning you over.

There's my girl, lemme take care of you~

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so i was thinking about how Howdy has eight legs bc he's a caterpillar - those have lots of legs. but butterflies? they only have six

imagine he comes out of his chrysalis and he's down two limbs. mf would have to relearn how to Walk

[aroaceleovaldez]

Nico and Percy's dynamic through the series is eternally funny to me, because it's just. like.

Percy's having a constant mental struggle between his fatal flaw of loyalty with a promise he made to Bianca to protect Nico, versus his Big 3 kid desire to maim other Big 3 kids / Poseidon descendant urge to totally maim Nico specifically. He hates Nico so so much. He thinks Nico's annoying and weird at best, and creepy/sketchy when he's older. The only positive thoughts Percy has towards Nico are "He's Bianca's brother and Bianca was my friend and I owe her/He's Hazel's brother and Hazel is my friend and would kill me if I was mean to him," "He's a powerful asset and useful ally (if questionable)," and "He's kinda pathetic and I feel maybe a little bad about it." Percy has multiple occasions throughout the series where he strongly considers - and on one occasionally actually goes through with - throttling Nico.

Meanwhile, Nico is following around Percy like a lost puppy. He explicitly can never bring himself to even dislike anything about Percy no matter how hard he tries. He has a whole bit in BoO where he's mentally going "UGH he's so stupid BUT IT'S ENDEARING HOW DARE HE." He's totally smitten. He's making deals with his dad for Percy. He's making convoluted plans to help Percy stand a chance against Kronos. During the entirety of BoTL it's like he's playing tsundere - "I'm helping NOT PERCY SPECIFICALLY with this quest! Me helping Percy would be SILLY because I DEFINITELY HATE HIM." Then he proceeds to show up to Percy's birthday party to basically ask him on a weird date and spend the entire next book scrambling around trying to help him or protect him or impress him. And Percy could not give less of a shit.

Just. That dynamic is so funny to me. Percy is the founder of the Nico Protection Club in that he's the one they're all protecting Nico from and meanwhile Nico is throwing himself at Percy to the point where the literal god of gay love calls him out on it.

[mochii-derogatory]

ive been watching the dog motif show... why is no one talking about this guy. isaac lahey come home from france,,,, sweet boy,,,, we miss you,,,

[bacchuschucklefuck]

okay unironically I love so much that porter is like this world SUCKS its BAD here and it HURTS you why do you care abt it!!! and literally every single bad kid is like ngl we just hate ur ass it does not matter what ur philosophy is