#I swear I got every single bad family gene

[bunnygirl678]

Well shit, just spent an hour on the phone with my aunt (shorter than our normal conversations lol) and I mentioned my brothers back problems but how it probably came from his moms side rather than our dad, and she goes, “bunny, your uncle (dads brother) has had 3 back surgeries, your cousin has had two, your brother has had however many he has had, and your father has had issues your entire life he just won’t go to the doctor”

And I started thinking and yep, even my granddad had issues and a surgery or two.

Everyone else has been lower back, mine just happens to be up in the neck

[aaronhotchnersquarterzip]

Meeting You Flipped the World Upside Down - Or Maybe Just Mine

This is it guys, I’m really proud in general of myself for finishing this and I hope you all enjoyed it as well. When I started this fic I honestly planned for a major character death or something dramatic like that. Never in my wildest dreams did I see this ending. I’m not mad though, I’ve had a rough time lately and this really summed up a lot of my feelings. There are people who will never truly leave your life and that's okay. You just shouldn’t let the thought of them hold you back. This has been my favorite thing to write ever and I want to thank everyone who has supported this and made me feel so good about my writing. I did leave this open ended if I ever did want to continue it but I think I want to write something a bit lighter next. I really hope you all enjoyed this as much as I have and remember to stay safe and drink some water today - Mya

Summary: Reader has been a rut, stuck in a never ending cycle of college worries and job interviews. Never did she think that SSA Aaron Hotchner, or Agent as she likes to call him, would walk into her favorite late night diner and flip her world upside down. And he for sure didn’t expect to fall in love so quickly with the soon to be college grad. They navigate finding love and working together to rediscover what that means for each of them.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner X Female Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Epilogue

Aaron Hotchner did flip your world upside down. Maybe just not in the way you expected. But in the way you needed. You watched your children chase their father around the backyard. It was nearly below freezing but they were going strong. You made hot chocolate for their impending arrival inside. In the meantime you curled up on the couch with a warm blanket and watched the fire burn. The Christmas tree was lit nicely in the corner of the living room, an abundance of presents spilling out. 

You pulled out your phone and scrolled through some old pictures. Baby pictures of your three children. Your wedding, it was a fall wedding. More than you could have ever dreamed of. You also looked at your college graduation pictures. Emily, JJ, and Penelope had surprised you and showed up to commencement. Screaming when you walked across the stage. You should call them soon. Finally, you found the picture you were looking for, you and Aaron at one of Dave’s dinners. It was a candid that Morgan took when you weren’t paying attention. Aaron has his arm around you while you’re talking to JJ about god knows what. It’s your favorite picture, beyond a shadow of a doubt. He looked at you like you were the only person in the room, you chose to remember nights that those. He changed you for the better, it was only fair you acknowledged that. 

Your thoughts were interrupted when your husband and kids ran inside from the cold. 

“There’s hot chocolate on the stove waiting for you monsters!” You yelled to them as they rushed to change into warmer clothes. 

When they had all settled and had their mugs of hot chocolate, your husband joined you on the couch. Soon followed by your children, two girls and one boy. They quickly turned on a pixar movie and snuggled up to you underneath several blankets. There was nothing you would change about your life. This was exactly where you were meant to be. 

By the time the credits rolled to Monsters University all three of them had fallen asleep. You carefully tucked in your youngest daughter, Greer. She was about to turn 2 in the spring. Your surprise baby. You couldn’t have been happier when you found out. Sure the stress of raising three kids got to you sometimes but they reminded you of all the good in the world. 

Next was Cheyenne, named after where you met your husband, Noah. You were travelling around the west and made a pit stop in Cheyenne and met the man you were meant to spend forever with. You couldn’t think of a better name for your first daughter, Noah couldn’t have agreed more. She embodied everything good about your husband, his compassion for sure. She was smarter than you by a long shot at just 8 years old. 

Finally you came to your oldests room. He had been a welcome surprise just a few months after your wedding. Your not so little boy mirrored you in a way you never thought possible. It scared you at first, everything about being a parent is scary sure, but nobody prepares you for raising your twin. He had your hair and eyes, Noah’s nose, but everything about him was you. His ambition never failed to wow you, he pushed himself to lengths you truly couldn’t believe sometimes. He however, did inherit some of your bad genes though. Sometimes he didn’t know when to stop, when to slow down and enjoy the present. You got better at that with age, you want him to achieve everything he puts his mind to but you need him to see when it’s happening. Not when it’s happened. 

You reached down and pushed some of his hair from his face so you could kiss his forehead. 

“Goodnight my sweet boy,” you whispered and he snuggled further into his blankets. You smiled softly and walked out quietly. He was already 12, sometimes you couldn't believe that you made it this far. You grew as you moved farther away, you knew that your life belonged out here. Sometimes it’s hard to trust fate but how could you justify meeting Noah and creating your dream life in your new favorite spot in America without believing at least a little bit in fate. 

You softly closed your little boy's door and ran your hand over the nameplate crested in the center of the door, Aaron, written in hues of blue. 

As you cuddled with your husband while he slowly fell asleep, you reached for your phone and scrolled through an album made just for you and Aaron. Noah may be your future, but Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner was the love of your life and you forever had a part of him. 

You pulled up his contact for the first time in 18 years and sent him the photo from that dinner at Dave’s a lifetime ago. You wrote a short message, 

I forgive you Agent - Y/N

The last thing you expected was a response, especially so quickly. It was a picture that you had posted on social media a few weeks prior, celebrating your 13th wedding anniversary. 

I’m happy you found better. What are their names? - Agent

My youngest is Greer, then Cheyenne. - Y/N

You wait a few minutes to respond, you know he read the message prior.

He’s named after the love of my life Aaron - Y/N

He called you then. You moved quickly and quietly from your bed and down into your living room. Answering before the line went dead. 

“You were the love of my life too Y/N. I just didn’t know it.”

There you sat, where just hours ago you were wrapped in blankets with your family, you were now transported to your life with Aaron. Staring into the fire with tears in your eyes. 

“It wouldn’t have mattered, Aaron, sometimes finding the love of your life doesn't mean spending the rest of your life with them. It means loving them for the rest of your life, even if that means watching them love someone else.” 

You could hear him sigh on the other end of the line, “I never stopped loving you. I won’t ever stop loving you Y/N.” 

“I will always love you too Aaron. I think I’m happier now than I ever was with you though. JJ told me you got remarried Agent. Congratulations. I’m sure she's perfect for you.”

“Yeah, pretty much. Her name is Beth, Jack loves her too.”

“I miss him. I’m happy he has someone again. You deserve to be happy Aaron. I forgave you days after. Hell hours even. But I knew that we both needed someone who understood us better. We both deserved that.” 

Just then you heard a door creak and the sound of feet pattering towards you, “mama,” Aaron’s voice squeaked out. 

“Right here, baby. What's wrong?”

“I heard you talking and wanted to talk with you too.” You laughed a little before putting your phone on speaker and introducing your son to Aaron. 

“Well alright, but I think you might need to know his name before you talk to him.” Aaron caught your drift, introducing himself through the phone. 

“Hi Aaron, I’ve heard all about you. My name is Aaron too and there is nothing I want more than to talk to you.”

Your little boy perked up at the idea that this man had the same name as him, Aaron was a good sport and talked to him for about 20 minutes before your boy was yawning between every word. 

“Say goodnight to Aaron buddy,” he murmured out a small goodnight and was helped back into bed. 

“He reminds me of you, I’m sure you know that already.”

“Everyone calls him my clone. Maybe it’s wishful thinking but sometimes I look into his eyes and swear I see you looking back at me Aaron. He’s how I imagined our children would turn out. Perfect in every single way.”

“Your husband is very lucky to have you Y/N. I’ll envy him until the end of time.”

You sensed this was the end of the conversation, you subconsciously wanted to never stop talking to him. That part of you that would always yearn for his comfort when you were breaking down in the bathroom or when you were so over the moon about something at work. You wanted to share those moments with him first. I guess some part of you always would. 

“I love you Aaron.”

“I love you too Y/N, goodnight”

“Goodnight Agent.”

[lilkittie]

Mom herself suffers from a deep shame

Deep deep shame

That she covered it up with being hella religious

Which is fake and unreal

Cause its beyond her humanity

She be wearing so wide wide things, and speaking to herself she won’t do dumb shit at her last years

Like wtf? Do we pray cause we love God or do we just don't wanna "dumb shit"?

Also it’s not only being religious that shows how shameful she’s, its so many other things I noticed

Like being a perfectionist

Which is all things she moved them to me as well!!!!!

But I be breaking the cycle.

And I’m so happy and proud of me for it.

Yup, its not only trauma and shame that my ancestors gave to me

There’s also bravery, kindness and so much more good things in my blood line

And don’t ask me how I knew, I have seen my family. Its in my genes.

Yeah mama has bravery at some points of her life as well. She would take action and take responsibility for its consequences no matter how good or bad is it

But she wasn’t brave enough to open up her wounds and face them.

And this is why, again, I was meant to break this cycle from going on again.

I have been called crazy.

I have been called that I have some bad friends who made me like this

I have been called i left my deen cause I decided to look up for truth myself and no longer believe her unbelievable standard of perfectionism that caused me shame as well

I also have been called wise

Beautiful soul and mind

And lighting up people’s dark roads

But none of this or that defined me

Yup, I would be happy hearing a nice compliment since all I have been hearing was criticism

But at the end it’s me who defines who I am

I’m at point where criticism doesn’t hurt me anymore, and my inner strong beliefs about myself never got affected

I may even respond harder than what I been told

And its not easy to be where I’m at, it takes a lot of work on oneself

So Yup, I have came a long way, and again, I’m grateful for me for it

Cause That’s the price you pay

For choosing yourself

For choosing consciousness

For choosing freedom

For choosing to be who you’re in a world that follows blindly anything

You gon be called crazy, stupid and went out of your mind

All just because you decided to be yourself.

So it’s forever my eyes that I’m gon see myself with.

Yeah, might consider some constructive criticism

But criticism just for criticism and destroy someone’s identity, nah i dont give a fuck about that

At the end, I’m not even my personality

My personality is just a gift the society and my family gave it to me

I’m my soul

Tho Every time I remember my family or I wanna talk about them, I end up talking this point and realizing I’m just here for a purpose doing

Being in this particular family serving that purpose

Going thru all of the things I went thru serving that purpose

Like I swear every time I think about my life I feel like I’m putting pieces together to a bigger picture I’m destined to

Self healing and working on myself wasn’t easy

Standing up for myself wasn’t easy

But I made it thru it all

I won every single game.

God never left me

God also used to send me people to help me

So when I’m talking about my life

I mean them people I met, family, teachers and everyone. Every single person I was destined to meet

My personality traits that I realized were a result because of my family as I discover myself

And realized there was no other way for me to be someone else

Its all beyond me. Gods plan 😀

So thank god

Thank god i have never been asleep and my eyes were usually wide open

Thank god im not that type of person who be 70 or 80 years old and say yeah now I can see it all clear

No, I see it all clear from now

Maybe I also had some very low points at my life. But it was my turning point that the light always came after

Cause I’m human dude.

I’m human who tryna be the best version of their self

And still I’m not done yet.

I mean I’m just 18 and I made all of that

Wonder how a 20 year old version of me gon be like

I still have a lot In plan.

Stay tuned :))

This is almost the best thing I wrote in a while. Put my heart, mind and soul in it.

Written in 20,July 2021

[totally-incorrect-theatre-quotes]

What’s in a Name? (Fanfic)

A sweet short story about Lydia’s middle names. 

Inspired by the headcanons created by me and @cowboybugman at 3am. 

____________________________________________________

Nothing. It has been one week since they brought their newborn baby girl home and they had nothing to call her. They had been fighting about her name the whole pregnancy, neither of them able to agree on a single name. Charles’ suggestions were all too stuffy like it had been picked from a “how to name your daughter so she’s sure to get a husband” book written in 1542. Emily’s, well according to her husband they were all a little too out there for a child growing up in the 21st century. They agreed when the found out she was a girl that they would wait until she was born, hoping that the minute they looked at her face they would know exactly what her names was but instead when she was born they both said different names and they now had a one-week-old that was being referred to exclusively as “Baby Deetz”. 

“Charles she can’t go through her whole life like this.” Emily laughed, rocking the blonde baby gently as her husband shook up a bottle for her, “She’s going to be so pissed off when she finds out we waited like six months to name her.”

“We aren’t going to wait six months! I’m pretty sure that’s illegal anyway. She’d have a name by now if you would just like one of my suggestions.”

“I can say the same thing to you!”

“For the last time, we are NOT naming her Sardonyx.”

“You’re just afraid she’ll grow up and be too powerful with a name like that.”

“No, I’m afraid that kids are going to call her Dix”  Charles opened his arms and held the baby, bouncing up and down trying to get her to take the bottle. “Why can’t we name her something a little more...mainstream? I like Sarah.”

“That’s so common! She’ll have to constantly be going, no I’m not Sarah H, I’m Sarah D. No not that Sarah D, Deetz. Sarah Deetz. Take it from an Emily honey, having a basic name does you no favors in life.”

“Okay, how about a compromise.”

“A compromise?”

“Yeah, we both write a list of twenty names. Whatever name we both have written. That’s what we’re going to name her.”

Emily smiled at her husband, planting a soft kiss on both his cheek and their daughter’s forehead, “It’s deal, but what if we don’t have any of the same names?”

“Then we keep going until we do.”

“See you in an hour then. It’s your turn to get her to nap anyway.”

An hour later they met up at the kitchen table highlighters in hand as they searched through each other’s lists, their infant daughter peacefully sleeping in the bassinet next to the table. After thoroughly scanning each list there was only one name that they had both written. Close to the top of both their papers, and it was perfect.”

“Lydia Deetz.” Charles whispered, looking longingly at the sleeping baby, “That’s it. That’s her name.” 

“It suits her perfectly.” 

The couple held hands across the table, in awe of the whole situation. Not that it hadn’t felt real all along but now that she had a name it struck them both that she a whole person, she wasn’t just baby Deetz anymore, she was Lydia. The moment was something they would both remember for years to come, but it sadly only lasted about two minutes before Charles reminded them how she needed a middle name and the entire process started all over again. Instead of waiting another week to make it official they agreed that they would each get one name that neither person could veto. They figured middle names weren’t all that important anyway, it wasn’t what people would call her so it didn’t matter if she had two of them.

“I literally cannot believe you are going to force the name Tiffany on her.” Emily whined, she held the baby up to her husband’s face, “Look at her face. Look at her! How could you do this to a poor innocent baby?”

“I hate the name as much as you do but my family would kill me if I didn’t sneak it in there somewhere. It was my grandmother’s name and every generation someone has it. They were already mad when I told them you refused to even consider it as a first name.”

“I mean...can you blame me?”

“No I can’t which is why it is buried as a middle name. And you are one to talk, I mean where did you even come up with Calendula?”

“If you aren’t being such a jerk,” she playfully pushed her husband’s shoulder, “I would have told you that it is a sentimental name. Remember when you joined the gardening club and you fell hopelessly in love with me?”

“You mean when I joined the gardening club and you fell hopelessly in love with me?”

“ANYWAY. The first plant that you grew on your own that didn’t die was a Marigold. You gave me one of the flowers after our first date. Calendula is the scientific name for a Marigold.”

Charles blushed, “Okay, that is so sweet. I don’t even know how you remember this stuff.”

“To save in my brain for years to make you all flustered ten years later because you are in awe of how good my memory is.”

“I would agree with you there, but you forgot to grab the car seat when we were leaving the hospital.”

“And?”

“It had our daughter inside of it.”

“I’m sorry, did you spend eight months carrying and sixteen hours giving birth to said child? You could have grabbed the car seat…”

“Fair, fair. Very fair.”

“So I guess that’s settled then, no more is she baby Girl Deetz identified only by the hospital bracelet so she isn’t one of those switched at birth babies.”

“I still am shocked that we ended up with this blonde baby. Like I know my grandfather had red hair but who would have thought the light hair gene would wind up in our daughter.”

“I think her hair is perfect, just like her name. Lydia Tiffany Calendula Deetz.”

Lydia was three years old and it was early in spring where it was still a little chilly out but it was the perfect weather to go outside and get some gardening done. Emily dressed her in blue overalls and a polka-dot shirt, handed her a trowel and the two of them got to work. They planted all sorts of plants from flowers to herbs to vegetables. Lydia needed her mother’s help for most of it but she very proudly stood next to the yellow marigolds she had planted all on her own. Emily couldn’t help but smile and grab her camera, capturing the memory to preserve forever. 

“You know what that flower is?” she asked the toddler

“Yellow daisy!”

“No, it’s a Marigold. They usually don’t grow in New York City but the world is always nicer with some color don’t you think sweetie?”

“Yep!”

“Did you know you were named after that flower? Calendula, it’s a very important name to me and daddy.” She sat down in the grass, pulling the squirming child into her lap despite the fact she wanted to play more in the dirt, “I think it’s your soul name. It’s different than your first name, that’s who you are but I don’t know Calendula seems like something special.”

Lydia didn’t really have a response, she was too young to understand the importance of what her mother was saying but she knew it was something nice because when Emily finished the conversation she pulled her daughter into a warm hug and whispered, “My little flower.” while stroking her curly blonde hair. 

She came home from school one day in third grade with tears in her eyes. The kids at school were picking on her because she wasn’t like all the other kids. She had brought her camera and some of the pictures she had taken for one of their school projects to school that day to present to the class and all throughout the rest of the day kids were teasing her about how lame her hobby was, and they called her a creep because she was trying to take pictures during recess. One of the boys had grabbed her camera while she was trying to walk home and threw in on the sidewalk before running away. It wasn’t ruined, thankfully, but it was still broken. She knew money was a little tight and she didn’t even want to tell her parents, but her mother knew something was wrong the second she opened the door. Lydia tried to brush it off as if she just had a bad day at school but when her mom asked where her camera was she started bawling and handed the broken pieces trying to get the story out between hiccuping sobs.

“They can be so mean. I try so hard to just be their friends but they never want to play with me, nobody ever wants to sit with me. I don’t know why they don’t like me. I just want to be normal.”

“Oh, Calendula.” Emily sighed, pulling her daughter into a tight embrace while she cried. She ran her fingers through her hair, “I know it can be hard, but there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfectly amazing just the way you are and it is their loss that they are too stuck in their ways to realize how wonderful you are.”

“They think I’m strange.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being strange. I’m strange, your father is strange. We’re just… a strange and unusual family but it is a family full of love, and you, my little Marigold are so freaking full of love. You are just filled to the top of it, I don’t know how a kid this small can fit so much amazingness inside her.”

“Mom, you’re just saying that because you have to.”

“Says who?”

“I’m your daughter, you have to tell me I’m amazing.”

“Lydia, I swear I will always be honest with you. I will not hesitate to tell you when you aren’t being amazing and but that’s going to be hard. There’s only one time where I won’t think you are amazing. Do you know when that is?”

Lydia rolled her eyes, wiping away the tears from her eyes, “When?”

“When you are not being you. Promise me you’ll never pretend to be someone you aren’t. You never have to smile when you aren’t happy, you never have to hide your tears or hide your anger because that is all you. Emotions don’t make you any less you, your hobbies don’t make you any less you, because you. Lydia Deetz, are a whole complex person that has so much to offer. So who cares what some other kids say, do you like yourself?”

Lydia nodded

“Then you will always be amazing in my humble opinion.”

Lydia didn’t really tell people her middle names. She disliked Tiffany with a passion and Calendula was something that just made her feel a certain way. She didn’t hide it if people asked her she would tell them her full name but it didn’t come up often so most people didn’t know. Obviously most people just called her Lydia. Her father called her sweetheart, and her mother would normally call her some floral pet names like flower or marigold. They were cute little things that earned eye rolls or blush from the tween and early teenager Lydia, much like how other kids felt about the silly names their parents gave them. 

When Emily first got sick the nicknames became more meaningful to her. Her heart would flutter when she would hear them and towards the end she craved to hear them over and over. In the last week, she wanted to be called nothing else besides Calendula. She wanted to be her mother’s little flower one more time. To be sitting in the garden where she would be told the very same story of why she got her name that her mother told every spring. She would give anything in the world to hear her mother saying her name, any name, just one more time.

The last name Emily called her daughter before she died was Lydia. Though she knew how much her daughter would have probably wanted to have been called Calendula it was important to Emily that her daughter knew that while she loved Calendula, Lydia was the name she and Charles had chosen together. That was who their daughter was. 

It was two months after Emily died before she heard that name again. Her father never called her it, it didn’t feel right because it was inherently tied to Emily. Lydia never really got in trouble much either so he never had a reason to bust out the full name tactic that parents always use. Especially since the death of her mother, she was always in her room, keeping to herself, and by default staying out of trouble. But after getting a phone call from the school that Lydia had been skipping classes to hide in the library and that her grades were slipping dangerously low Charles knew that he couldn’t just let this slide like he was letting so many other things do. This was her future, she can’t ruin her life just because her mother died. If Emily were still there she would know exactly how to handle it but instead, Charles sat awkwardly at the kitchen table with Lydia’s report car folded awkwardly in his hands, waiting for her to come home from school. 

“Lydia, can you please sit down here?” Charles asked when she came through the door.

She must have known what was coming because she didn’t protest, she slide the chair from the table and sat down without saying a word. She kept her eyes trained down on the ground and her father sighed, “I got a call from your school today. They told me that you’ve been skipping your therapy sessions, you haven’t been going to classes, and look I just got your report card in an email from your teachers. Lydia, you have three failing grades. You’re failing history, you’re failing math, you’re failing english. Look you ever have a C in science, I thought you really liked biology and you said that the teacher was really engaging. What is going on?”

“I don’t like that therapist dad! I told you that, I told you that months ago and you never listen to me. I tell you all the time that I can’t even get out of bed in the morning anymore so no, my grades haven’t been stellar. So sorry I haven’t been the perfect daughter you wanted me to be, I am so sorry I am such a disappointment-”

“Lydia that is not what I am saying!” He raised his voice slightly, “This is so unlike you. I know you had trouble with the kids at school in the past but this is serious now, these are your grades you are going to high school next year you can’t start slipping now or you’ll never go to college.”

“Is that all you care about! Having a kid that you can show off to all your business friends? Look how successful I am, my daughter isn’t a complete and utter failure, who cares if she hates herself she has a degree and that’s all the matters isn’t it?”

“You are being ridiculous. You are taking an issue that is now, and blowing it up to something that won’t even be a problem in the future. What we need to talk about is right now, you cannot keep skipping classes!”

“Okay dad, I promise I won’t be such a fuck-up in the future if it makes you happy.”

“Lydia-”

She jumped up from her chair, “No, no I totally get it you want me to slap a fucking smile on my face and pretend that everything is fine when it’s not!”

“Lydia-”

“I will pretend to be someone I’m NOT because that is just the kind of daughter I am. Whatever you want me to do dad, I have to make you proud don’t I?-”

“Lydia Tiffany Calendula Deetz that is ENOUGH!” He shouted.

She went silent, they both did. They stared at each other, unblinking but he could see tears welling up in her eyes but she desperately tried to fight them back. Charles wanted to reach out to her, he wanted to say..something but she quickly turned away and ran up to her room, the door slamming behind her. 

He sat at the table for a long time, processing what he had just done. He didn’t apologize, but he never did it again.

Things had been rough when they first moved into the new house, a lot of crazy things had happened but after a while, the dust had finally settled and everything was starting to feel normal again. Charles was working on being a better father to Lydia, trying to be more in tune with her emotions and responding appropriately. Her fifteenth birthday was coming up in September and he wanted to give her something special, it was the first birthday without Emily here but he wanted her presence, he knew it would be good for Lydia. 

He agonized for weeks over the perfect gift and finally, he knew exactly what to get her. On her birthday the whole family came together and celebrated. Cake and presents and games, by the end of the night Lydia was exhausted but so full of gratitude. 

It was nearing midnight when Charles said to her, “I know it’s almost not your birthday anymore but there is one more present. I wanted to wait until after all the festivities to give it to you.”

She smiled, taking the box from his hand and shaking it gently, “What is it?”

“Open it and find out.”

Inside the box was a custom made necklace, a black and silver locket engraved with a flower on the front. She didn’t even have to hesitate, she knew it was a marigold. She opened up the locket and inside was a photo of a three-year-old Lydia standing proudly in front of a patch of marigolds she had planted in the family’s garden, on the other side a photo she had never seen before. A photo of her mother holding Lydia when she was a baby, a picnic blanket covered in marigolds beneath them. Tears were forming in her eyes and she threw herself into her father’s arms thanking him profusely and she giddily turned around so he could put it on her.  She lifts up her hair that had grown past her neck now and he fastened the clasp, and Lydia positioned the pendant right above her heart. 

Lydia had never told Beetlejuice her middle names. She knew that they were too powerful of a weapon, everyone in the family had a name based nickname that was used to tease them and Lydia had managed to go months without having one to use against her. She guarded her middle names, not even telling the Maitland’s but what she could have never predicted was Beetlejuice snooping around in her father’s office and finding her birth certificate. He sat on the names for weeks, knowing he couldn’t use them too soon or else they wouldn’t be as powerful. 

Lydia had come home from school one day and was venting to Beetlejuice in the living room how annoying some of the popular girls at school were because all they cared about was makeup and boys and clothes. Beetlejuice was getting tired of the “I’m not like other girls” rant after about fifteen minutes and calmly, and cooly and looked her dead in the eyes and said.

“Okay, Tiffany.”

The neighbors described the following interaction as, “The sound a velociraptor makes when it is being attacked by a T-Rex trying to take the prey it had just killed.”

Lydia screamed at him she was so shocked that he even knew her middle name that she was just blind with rage. He just stood there with a smirk on his face that she wanted to claw off with her bare hands. She screamed at him so much that her voice was starting to grow hoarse, but the time Charles heard the commotion and came downstairs all he could hear with Lydia screeching, “DID YOU REALLY JUST CALL ME FUCKING TIFFANY?”

Charles froze like a deer in headlights and promptly ran off into oblivion until Lydia cooled down. Unfortunately for him she never cooled down, she simply changed targets and followed him into his office and proceeded to harras him for a solid hour about how terrible of a name Tiffany was and how insulted she was he had told Beetlejuice, even though Beetlejuice had discovered it on his own. 

It became a funny thing after a while. Beetlejuice would call her Tiffany when she needed to be taken down a peg, and several other nicknames stemmed from her middle names, each falling on a delicate scale of rage-inducing to endearing nicknames. He never used Calendula though, it was awkward to pronounce and he didn’t exactly know how to use it against her in a teasing way so he often just went for shortened versions like Cal or Callie to annoy her. One day he was testing the waters though, they were in the middle of a stupid argument, it wasn’t even a real one at first, it was one of those fake arguments friends have just to pass the time and without even realizing it he says it.

“Oh, you just think that you’re proposal for weaponizing bees is SO much better than mine don’t you Calendula.”

She didn’t even register it at first, she was still laughing but the laughter quickly faded and was replaced with a gasp. She clutched instinct to the necklace around her neck, the rest of her body paralyzed in shock and a mixture of grief and anger. She could feel her chest tightening and it was becoming hard to breathe. Beetlejuice stood there, confused as to why his friend had withdrawn but before he could even properly react she ran upstairs to her room and he could hear faint sobbing coming from inside. 

He waited a few minutes, wanting to give her some space while he tried to figure out what he had done wrong. She never had a problem with him calling her Cal, or Callie, or hell he even called her Candle that one time just to mess with her. He didn’t understand why this time was so different just because he used to whole name. He knocked on her door softly, and he could hear her catching her breath and trying to compose herself before she called out, “Come in.”

He sauntered in awkwardly, before plopping down on the bed next to an unusually pale

Lydia, her hands shaking while she calmed herself down.

“Kid, what happened? Was it something I said?”

She nodded, “Yeah, it’s not your fault though, I never told you. It’s just that, nobody even really called me Calendula but my mom. It was the name she picked for me, and I don’t hear it often ever since..ever since she died. I didn’t expect you to say it, and I’m not mad I just, I wasn’t prepared it hit me really hard. I’m sorry for freaking out on you.”

Beetlejuice shook his head, “You have nothing to be sorry for, I didn’t know but I’m really sorry I made you feel this way.”

She smiled at the demon and leaned her head on his shoulder while he gave her a reassuring hug from the side.

He didn’t really understand the whole having a good relationship with someone’s mother but he knew how important Emily was to Lydia, and he realized that while she was willing to put up with a lot of his playful teasing Calendula was off-limits. 

Throughout her life, Lydia was given lots of little reminders of her mother’s presence in her life through her middle name. A marigold corsage for her first school dance, a marigold potted plant sat on an empty seat in the auditorium at her high school graduation, when she married Wendy she had a wildflower bouquet and marigolds braided into her hair. Emily was always there in spirit as long as there were marigolds somewhere. When she moved into her own house the first thing she planted was a flower garden with a specific kind of flower for each family member. 

When she and Wendy first adopted their son Lawrence they would spend hours in the garden just pointing to them and talking about who they represented. Lawrence was three years old when Lydia had given birth to a baby girl. She had blonde hair like Lydia had when she was born, she looked like the personification of the color yellow earning her the full name of Emma Marigold Blackwood-Deetz. 

Beetlejuice was surprisingly good with the kids, and his heart was completely blown away when he met Emma for the first time. He ruffled Lydia’s hair like he had while she was still a kid, looked at her and saw just how grown up she had become. He cradled her newborn daughter gently in his arms while the whole family looked on with so much love and affection. He couldn’t bring his eyes away from the infant when he said to Lydia, “Looks like you’ve got a new little marigold now.”

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

Follow In His Footsteps

lo and beholdRequest: @flowerchildqueenlovely​ : I think I would want you to write about jimmy. Like how he is handling being a hero at shield. Is jimmy and Sam together? Is Frankie on the team too? How is he coming to turn with him being a descendent of Captain America or Steve Rogers.

Pairing: Dad!Bucky & Jimmy

Words Count: 1,378

----

One-Shot from the My Eyes Universe.

Spoiler filled (and confusing) if you haven’t read the series.

My Eyes - Masterlist

His eyes stared at the screen. He was wearing glasses – not that he needed them to see. That super-soldier in his genes made damn sure that his vision stayed 20/20. It’d probably stay that way until the day he died.

No, these were those blue-light glasses that everyone insisted on buying these days. Apparently, they were better for people’s eyes, especially when they were staring at a computer screen all day.

Sam had insisted on buying both of them a pair.

And she was the only reason he was wearing them now. Jimmy didn’t have the heart to tell her that he probably wouldn’t need them. But she always told him how cute he looked in glasses. And the smile she had on her face every time she caught him in them was reason enough for Jimmy to keep putting them on.

Jimmy felt a part of warms arms wrap around his shoulders. It was a little concerning that he didn’t sense her approaching. But her energy had only ever comforted him, maybe that was why she could sneak up on him and no one else could.

He felt her press a kiss to his temple as he gripped her forearm lovingly. Her skin was hot from just getting out of her cocoon of blankets.

“Did I wake you up?” Jimmy asked with concern.

Sam chuckled breathily as she kept her arms around him. “Yeah, could you keep your computer staring down a bit. I can hear you from the other side of the apartment.”

Jimmy let out a breath of laughter. “I’m editing some photos.” Then he pulled her around and into his lap, wrapping his arms around her now. “What do you think?” He asked as he shuffled through some recent photos he’d taken.

“They’re great, Jimmy.” Then she pointed at one in particular, “That one’s my favorite.”

“Yeah?” He answered with a smirk. “Not this one?” He asked, settling on a photo of her. She had been redecorating her office: paint smeared on her cheek, wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt that both belonged to Jimmy.

“Eww. Definitely not that one,” Sam cringed.

“Hey, that’s my girlfriend you’re talking about.” Jimmy attacked her face and neck with kisses, even gave her a playful bite.

Sam giggled and pretended to try and push him away. “Come on. Come back to bed. I need my human boiler next to me.” She tried to seal the deal with a quick kiss to his lips.

“I’ll be there in a second. Just want to finish up these photos.”

Sam narrowed her eyes a little. “Photos, huh? This doesn’t have anything to do with the mission you got back from today?”

Jimmy ignored her.

Sam caressed his cheek.

He bit his lip, trying to stop the trembling as her question brought forward all the thoughts he was trying to fight. 

“It was two kids, Sam. Maybe they were siblings – fuck, I still don’t even know. I was so close to them. The last thing they saw was me reaching out to them before the floor collapsed.”

He shakily took off his glasses and then pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I…I just keep thinking how he would’ve saved them. He was better than me. I’ll never save as many people as he did.”

Sam’s heart broke from what she was hearing. Her eyes filled with tears, but this wasn’t her loss to mourn. She had to be strong for him.

Jimmy buried his head into her chest and Sam welcomed it, running her fingers through his hair in comfort.

“James,” she only used his full name when she was about to say something important. “Your father was a martyr. The very idea of him is god-like. People remember an exaggeration of him.” Then she pulled his face up so he was forced to look into her eyes. “He made mistakes, just like everyone else.”

Sam sighed. “It’s not fair to your dad to remember him as a perfect person, and it’s especially not fair to you.”

Jimmy nodded slowly, letting her words wash over him. Sam always knew what to say. The scarier thing was that there was always sincerity and truth behind her words. She never said things just to say them.

Sam stroked Jimmy’s beard, one of the few differences between him and his dad. That and his tattoos.

“Maybe you should call Bucky, James.” She suggested gently.

He sighed, “I don’t want to worry him.”

She smirked. “Spoiler alert: that man always worries about you. I think you should call him.”

“OK,” He finally agreed.

“Wanna try to go to bed now?”

But Jimmy’s only answer was gripping her tightly and raising them both from the desk chair, carrying her in his arms back to their bedroom.

———————————————

It only takes a single ring before his deep voice is heard.

“Well, look who remembered how to use a phone again…” Bucky teased.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know I’ve been bad about it,” Jimmy rolled his eyes, but knew that his father-figure had a point.

“Your mom misses you, kid.” Bucky’s tone was more serious now.

“I’m sorry. Really.” Jimmy pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ve just been…really busy.”

Bucky’s back straightened at the sound of Jimmy’s voice. “Everything OK?”

“I’m fine. Sam’s fine. We’re all fine,” Jimmy quickly answered.

Bucky was silent for a second. “What’s going on, Jimmy?”

“Sam….she…uh…she thought maybe it would be good for me to call you.”

Bucky didn’t say anything, just waited for him to continue.

“My last mission…” Jimmy stopped, not really sure how to even go about telling Bucky what was going on or how he was feeling. “I couldn’t save them, Bucky.” His voice shook as he finally said it.

Bucky was silent.

“I just keep thinking about him. How he would’ve done better. Everyone wants me to be like him – if not better. And I just-I don’t think I’ll ever be good enough, Bucky. Maybe I shouldn’t have this shield.”

Bucky didn’t need Jimmy to explain who ‘him’ was – he immediately knew this was about Steve.

“Jimmy,” Bucky sighed as he rubbed his face and tried to gather his thoughts. “Jesus, sometimes it scares the shit out of me how much you’re like him. You never got to meet him and yet you still remind me so much of him.”

Jimmy’s stomach clenched at that. It was all people seemed to tell him. And it wasn’t just the media and Captain America fans. It was the people who knew and loved Steve Rogers.

“Steve wasn’t perfect. He lost people too, Jimmy. And he beat himself up about it just like you’re doing now. I don’t want to mess with the image you have of your father…but he was a flawed person just like you and me. Hell, just like everyone.”

Jimmy’s eyes swelled with tears. “I never even knew him, so why does it feel like I’m always trying to make him proud?”

Bucky’s heart hurt at Jimmy’s confession.

“Steve would’ve been the proudest dad in the world, Jimmy. And none of it would have anything to do with you taking over the mantle of Captain America.”

Bucky exhaled and shook his head. “He wouldn’t want you to try to live up to his legacy, Jimmy…because he knew that he couldn’t even do that. Yeah, he was the first Captain America. But without the shield, without the stupid uniforms… we all knew he was just Steve Rogers. He was just another man.”

A single tear escaped and slid down Jimmy’s face. He wiped it away roughly, scratching his skin in the process.

“Steve was stubborn. Didn’t know when to run way from a fight. He had trouble seeing the gray areas in issues. Sometimes he held people to too high of standards. Then he judged ‘em too harshly when they didn’t meet them.” Bucky paused his listing and took a breath. “Your father is the best man I’ve ever known, but that doesn’t mean he was perfect.”

Jimmy nodded, even though Bucky couldn’t see it.

“You talk to your mom about this?” Bucky asked carefully.

“No,” Jimmy answered quickly. “You know how much she worries about me. I didn’t want to freak her out.”

“Well, if anyone knows what Steve was like after a mission went wrong, it’s her. She might be better to talk to than me.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Jimmy?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad you called.”

“Me too,” he admitted.

There was a beat and the tension disappeared.

“You treating that girl of yours right?” His voice suddenly got stern and father-like.

Jimmy laughed. “I think you and I both know if I wasn’t, she’d let me know and dump my sorry ass.”

Bucky chuckled, knowing Jimmy was right.

“How’s Frankie?” Jimmy asked about his teenage sister. It seemed like yesterday he was chasing a toddler around the house and now she was becoming a young woman.

“I swear, Jimmy...Teenage girls are a different species,” Bucky groaned.

Jimmy just laughed. “That bad, huh?”

“Sometimes she scares the hell outta me. Doesn’t help that she’s smarter than me in almost every way.” He exhaled. “But she’s good.”

Jimmy hummed. It was more of a courtesy to ask. His sister and him texted every single day.

“And mom?”

“Like I said, she misses the hell outta you. Do me a favor? Call her a bit more. I think it’s starting to get to her that she sees you more on the news than she sees you in person.”

“I know. I’m real sorry.” Jimmy sighed. “If it makes a difference, I miss the three of you like crazy.”

“I know you’re busy saving the world, punk. But you gotta have a life too, you know. Otherwise, what’s the point?”

Sam walked in then, carrying two giant bags from the grocery store.

“Is that Bucky?” She asked with a questioning look.

Jimmy nodded.

“Hi, Bucky!” She called out, making Jimmy smile.

Bucky chuckled on the line. “I’ll let you go. Give Sam a hug from me.”

“Will do.”

“And Jimmy? I just want to make sure you know that you can call me about this stuff, OK? You’re not going to freak me out. If anyone understands what you’re going through, it’s your family.” He hesitated. “We’re with you till the end of the line.”

Jimmy hummed in understanding.

“I know, Buck. Love you.”

“Love you too, kid. Stay safe. Be careful.”

“I’ll try my best.”

------------------------------------

A/N: So, I haven’t written a drabble or one-shot for My Eyes in ages. I was feeling uninspired and looked through asks and requests that have been sitting in my inbox, collecting dust. Lo and behold, I finally felt like I could write something. 

If you haven’t already and want to emerge yourself in My Eyes ask, checking out the My Eyes Asks tag. 

[starbuck09256]

Hope

It’s Fictober!!!!

Post Ep Emily

tagging @today-in-fic @fictober-event @fictober @suitablyaggrieved

from the drabble prompts

Prompts “Don’t shut me out.”

She traces the images of a smiling 3 year old. Whose short hair mimics her sister. The scattered tissues that barely hold her tears mingle with the dried blood under the floorboards. As she sits against the hard wood door in a heap of convulsing sobs. She was so strong at the funeral, her sadness contained in the shell of her broken down body. Everytime she closes her eyes she sees a scared little face begging her to stop the tests. She sees Mulder clutching yellow flowers too tightly as his own sorrow for her pours from his eyes. He knows what this tiny child was to her. He knows that she wanted another life another path, not because of him or their quest. But because fate had chosen her to live on, she had been returned survived the incurable and yet her destiny wasn’t to find the joys that she had forsaken it was as if she was being punished for fighting. She lived but she will never live on in the form of another, she will never have a child that bares her dna. She will never get to feel a baby rolling around in her womb. Never have to worry about labor pains, morning sickness. She will never be able to give Mulder the family he has sought after for 20 plus years. When she was dying it didn’t matter what she did, it was almost easier not caring for the consequences, because in 6 months she would be dead and it would be someone else's problem. That they would have to see how she shattered herself, shattered her relationships, pushed people away so that when she died the pain would be less. Her mother, her brothers.. Mulder. She pushed back and worked and focus on things that were tangible and lacked the emotional connection, a connection she wasn’t interested in forming when death's door was all but a breath away. But now she is here in a world that has cursed her to relive a walking nightmare, happy families practically taunting her, Mulder trying to be closer but yet still keeping his distance despite her practically throwing herself at him. He knew when she told him she couldn’t have children, he knew and that was why he pushed her away months ago. Now she knows why she never realized it, never realized that all he wants is a family. The way he speaks of Samantha of a life lost in time. He is frozen there, in this disillusionment of the perfect happy family and he craves it so badly. She should have known, should have realized when he was talking about baseball and small towns. Saw how his eyes lit up with Emily. He thought there was a chance, a chance for them and this little girl. He didn’t care if it wasn’t his he just cared that it was hers. He wanted to do everything he could to protect them, Emily and her and in the end as always they both lost. Her heart breaks a little more as she squeezes the tissue in her hand. She knows the human body can’t possibly run out of water from tears, but in moments like this she feels like it's as much as anything. She feels the knock on her door against her head. The lights are dimmed and if she doesn’t move perhaps her will let her suffer the pain alone, like she should. It wasn’t his daughter that died, it’s not his chance for parenthood that is on the line. Just hers. Just her that will forever see Emily's face in tiny toddlers, her that will envision an entire life for a girl she barely knew. 

Mulders voice comes through “Please Scully, don’t shut me out.” The last of the words are barely audible and she keeps thinking I have to, I can’t have us both broken at the same time. How will we save one another if both of us just want to die? 

Her breathe heaves in and out of her lungs as she tries desperately to control her emotions for just enough time to tell him she is fine, cursed and miserable, but fine. But he is whole, safe, able to share his beautiful genes with any woman who would be so very lucky to have him. Deep breath. 

“I’m fine..” her voice practically shatters at the word and she can’t help the tears that mingle with her lips as she repeats it to herself in a whisper, ”I’m fine, it’s fine… everything is ….” and the door clicks and before she can even figure out how to control her tears she is in his arms and they are both crumbling to the floor as her sobs wrack through her body in uncontrollable spasms. He’s there not reassuring her but stroking her back like he did to Emily in the group home. God, Emily those tests how could she as her mother ever make her child needlessly suffer for the small glimmer of hope of what could of been. 

“Mulder, I was such a terrible mother to her, I let them test her, I made her suffer just so that I could have a few more moments with the only child I will ever have. I failed her, the one person in the world that mattered.”

 Mulders hand continues up and down and her face gets buried in his neck. 

“You showed her love Scully, and tried everything to save her, to give her the life she deserved, to love her unconditionally. You are what all mothers strive to be,” he stares deep into her water filled eyes and continues “a protector, who had to make the hardest choice imaginable, and you chose to set her free from the confines of a world that would have only caused her more pain than anyone should ever experience.” 

He cups her face in his hands kissing her tears as she hiccups in sorrow. He takes them to the couch and she is so mentally exhausted she barely notices. Barely registers the warm blanket that he drapes around both of them before her body finally gives in to a dreamless slumber. 

When she wakes he has a small cup of tea for her. She rubs her eyes and mutters her thanks. 

“You don’t have to stay, thank you for coming over, I just..”

He pursues his lips stares at her paintings, and sits next to her taking her hands in his.

He clears his throat “I know you think that my mother was terrible to me, that she neglected me and that my family life was horrible. But the problem was.. It wasn’t. Before Sam was taken it was perfect, it was the perfect life. Summers on the vineyard, baseball, peanut butter sandwiches, endless hugs, family barbecues. It was like your family, everyone was just happy to be together. Sure Sam was annoying, but she would play stratego with me. My mom would try to make pancakes in the shape of the Enterprise. My dad would throw a baseball to both of us, from the second his feet hit the driveway until well after the street lights came on. He never even got to go inside and put down his briefcase. Over the years, after, the baseball gloves collected dust the pancake mix went bad and all that was left was two people who were shells of their former selves. They weren’t my parents they were people who were so broken that no amount of love or devotion or success would put them back together again, and I was there and watched it all. I saw what losing a family member does to people. What it did to me, what it did to them. So I know you will be fine, because you need to tell yourself that, need to believe it like you believe in god and science. But you will wonder, you will wonder if Emily would ever have loved ballet, if she would be good at soccer, if she would love math and science like you or history and art like me. There will be moments where you will swear that you see her on the street, moments where a candle will flicker out and you feel her breath on your skin. You will hear her laugh in wind and feel her tears in the rain, and in every single one of those moments you will not be fine, and you need to accept that those moments Scully, those are the moments that prove that life is worth living. I want you to tell me when those moments happen Scully. I want you to tell me because being shut out, taking it all on your own, doesn’t make you strong, it makes you hate the world. It makes you into the shell of a person, and there is nothing worse than living life with deep seated regret and pain. I can’t watch another person I love become… hopeless. So I need you to tell me, so you and I can work on it together. To grieve together for the life we could of had, and for the pain we must endure. Can you do that for me Scully? Please?”

As the tears stream down her face she can’t help but nod. Because he’s right, of course he is, and years from now, when she still can’t get rid of him and him of her they will see a girl who they swear looks exactly like Emily, playing in puddles in her ballet outfit. They will see a kid with her smile looking at a science project. They will feel her presence in the darkest of circumstances and know for a glimmer of a second that hope endures. 

[lovelyirony]

Ironwidow fake dating and cousin Sharon matchmaking

Nat and Tony have been friends since seventh grade, when Tony made fun of her drawing and in retaliation, Nat stuck a pencil in his thigh. 

He grinned at her after sneakily getting a tissue from the front desk. 

“You’re pretty good, Nat.” 

“My name is Natasha.” 

“Not to me, it’s not.” 

So it becomes Nat and Tony. Tony and Nat. They do everything together, from attend the eighth grade pool parties and hate all of them to the freshman orientation in high school where they make fun of the senior leaders and sneak into the admissions office to make sure they have at least one class together. (And then change the schedule when they don’t.) 

Tony has been in love with Natasha Romanoff since the first eighth grade pool party, when she showed up in a full wet suit because she didn’t like the way that their classmate Ivan liked her. 

But, he hasn’t done anything about it. Why is that, everyone asks? Just ask her out! 

Well, Tony has a special talent that is medically known as “anxiety,” but he also has common sense. 

Natasha Romanoff is beautiful. She has gorgeous red hair, eyes that know everything about you before you even think they do, a wicked sense of humor, and a sense of self that is beyond anything Tony’s ever encountered. 

Tony stays up until three a.m., doesn’t give a shit about his appearance so he is frequently rushing to school with the worst bed hair imaginable, and also wears possibly the most out-of-style clothing ever. 

Like right now. A pair of jeans that’s too short and he cuffed only on one leg, a shirt that’s advertising some college Howard made him visit, and he’s pretty sure that the plaid he layered it with has a coffee stain down the back. 

He’s proven right when Sharon wrinkles her nose. 

“Dude, you seriously haven’t done laundry since two weeks ago, have you?” 

“Do I smell bad? Do I?” 

She leans in. 

“No, just like old coffee. So regular. We’ll see when Nat comes. Or you could confess your love to have her not roast your choice of apparel.” 

Tony scowls, adjusting his backpack. 

“Do you have another topic, or are you just that boring?” 

“I could also tell you about World War One,” Sharon adds. “I just read about it in one of those stupid textbooks I have to carry around. Did you know that the French are actually the worst at war?” 

“Yes, everyone knows that. I think they know that too.” 

Nat’s already at her locker. She looks gorgeous with her jean jacket, the new patches sewn on. 

“Looking cute,” Sharon says appreciatively. “Do you think you’re gonna get dress-coded for the ‘fuck men’ patch?” 

“Not if they want me to write an article on how the club fund got cut but the football team got another new field within four years,” Nat says. 

“Still a good article,” Tony says. “If you could still get into a college without a reputation ruined. You know how much schools care about sports.” 

“More than education at times!” Sharon cheers. 

Nat snorts, bringing Tony into a hug. 

“Nice to see you, dude. Ready for history?” 

“Not in the slightest. We’re probably talking about government procedure again while our teacher waxes poetic about the justice system. I think I might try to change the FDA’s home screen again.” 

“You know, they might catch on after the fourth time of you inserting random YouTube videos to different links.” 

“It’s the Federal Department of Agriculture, I highly doubt they care,” Tony says, rolling his eyes. “Besides, I’ve already proven that I’m probably better with technology than the government itself.” 

This was true; Tony had hacked into the official website of the White House with shitty hotel Wi-Fi and half his sanity. (It was flu season, he’d had way too much Ny-Quil.) 

School passes by with little incident, all things considered. A classic Monday, with the only real excitement being an announcement of no school the following Monday for a staff meeting. 

It isn’t until Tony gets home to find both of his parents home and in the same room, waiting for him, that he starts to panic. 

“Is this an intervention?” Tony asks. “Did I do something bad?” 

“Not yet,” Howard says. “Although I wouldn’t be surprised.” 

“Dear,” Maria reprimands. “No, there’s an event that we want you to attend.” 

“Want or need?” Tony asks. “I was supposed to hang out with my friend Bruce to work on his genetics lab.” 

“I’m sure the lab can wait,” Howard scoffs. “You’re in high school, for god’s sake.” 

“Bruce is doing lab work for Culver,” Tony says. “He got early acceptance, so he’s doing a weird deal so he gets college credit and a year off early.” 

“Impressive, dear,” mom says, smiling. “But this event is something that you can’t miss.” 

It’s a goddamn family reunion. Maria’s side, but still. At least Peggy and Sharon would come. 

Family reunions on the Carter/Carbonell side are…interesting. A lot of loud people, aunts that couldn’t stop cooking, and at least one uncle that would say something marginally horrible and cause a rift for at least six hours where everything was tense. 

Sharon had to take this advantage carefully. 

So she got her own email into the family chain of them–a mistake by all accounts, but one that should be committed sooner rather than later–and tells the family that Tony is bringing his girlfriend, Natasha. 

They both love each other, she knows that much. Tony looks at Nat like he could give her anything in the world, and Nat looks at him with so much vulnerability that she always says she doesn’t have. 

They’ve liked each other for a while now. Sharon wishes that it wasn’t at her family reunion that she was doing this, but it was either that or a dance for high school, and that’s far too much work. 

Tony, understandably, is stressed. 

“Does she even know she’s going?!” Tony yells. “Holy shit Sharon, she’s going to meet like eighty of us!” 

“Yeah,” Sharon says. “She just doesn’t know that she’s supposed to be your girlfriend.” 

“Sharon.” 

“Yes?” 

“Run.” 

Sharon squeals as she skids out of the room, Tony chasing after her. He’s not really going to do anything about it, but he still has to text Nat. 

i am. so sorry 

lmao it’s fine. sharon just said i’m going to the reunion. why? 

funny story…

fuck what’d she do 

she emailed everyone that i was bringing you as a girlfriend. and i’m not really going to spend the whole weekend correcting it. 

gotcha. operation: fake dating commence! 

thank you nat. seriously love you 

Nat reads the message, but doesn’t respond. Of course Sharon would pull something like this. She knew that Nat liked her cousin, probably since they were kids. 

And now she had to pretend to be his girlfriend, something she actually wanted very much to do. 

She gets a text from Sharon. 

Please don’t wear your jean jacket with all the patches. It’s very cool, but you will start a fight in my family and win. But then you aren’t allowed to come back :( 

Natasha sends her back the middle finger, but then promises not to bring it.

This brings up the subject; what do you wear to a family reunion? 

- 

Tony’s fidgeting in the car as he goes to pick up Nat. His mother was very surprised. 

“You got your father’s distinct habit of not shutting your mouth,” she says with a chuckle. “But I do suppose the gazes say it all. Every Carbonell man looks like he’s in love before he says it, so–” 

“Mama, not now!” Tony hisses. Natasha’s making her way to the car, backpack slung around her shoulder and an elegant handbag in the crook of her arm. 

“Hey Ms. Carbonell,” Natasha says. “How are you?” 

“Doing good, better now that I get to have you with us,” she teases. “Anthony over here never told me that he was going to have you on as a special guest.” Natasha sends a raised eyebrow over to Tony. 

“Oh?” 

“I forgot,” Tony lied smoothly. “You know how I get in the labs. Just completely forget everything I’m supposed to remember.” 

The conversation is easy after that: just a few little anecdotes that Nat and Tony have gone over last night over the phone. They had confessed that they liked each other a year ago, had kept it extremely low-key since both didn’t want to fuss with it, and that was that. 

“How come Sharon knew but I didn’t?” Mom pouts. 

“She’s an imp,” Tony answers. “An imp who doesn’t know how to keep business to herself.” 

Their family fills up a small inn out of the way, and Tony sighs as he sees three of his aunts already conspiring at the bar. 

“Be prepared for a barrage of questions.” 

“Roger that.” 

Natasha is whisked away by the ladies with a few compliments to the cute flats she’s wearing and her favorite type of perfume. Tony gets led over to Sharon, who is playing darts with Trip and their kind-of-but-not-really-cousin, Ricardo. 

“What have I missed out on?” Trip asks, grinning. “Heard some girl was crazy enough to come and date you. She’s a looker, Tony.” 

“Thanks,” Tony says. “But yes, crazy enough to date me. Sharon knows how crazy it is, I practically get the same gene from her.” 

Sharon rolls her eyes, landing another bullseye. Ricardo curses. 

“How do you always manage to do this?” 

“Practice for this exact moment,” Sharon says with a grin. “Go get me a drink. One of the good ones.” 

“You seriously get him to do your bidding every single time,” Tony says with a laugh. Trip excuses him to see Uncle Erik, leaving Sharon and Tony alone. 

“So. You liking your new status of boyfriend?” 

“You seriously need to stop meddling,” Tony scowls. “Just because I like her doesn’t mean she should be in on this.” 

“She doesn’t mind,” Sharon scoffs. “Besides, I think Aunt Angie is going to tell her about the cardboard incident.” 

“Oh my god–” 

Natasha saunters over, grinning devilishly. 

“So. Naked and a cardboard box for modesty? Why am I not surprised at the innovation, Tony?” 

“Dammit,” Tony swears. “I’m going to learn something embarrassing about you. I’ll ask Clint.” 

“Like he’ll tell.” 

The reunion goes about as well as expected. Uncle Daniel finally spills the beans and says that his son who couldn’t make it was going to bring his girlfriend that no one likes, but they canceled at the last minute. 

“They’re horrible,” Tony says. “I’m serious. They’re the kind of people that take advantage of old people.” 

“Gross.” 

They gravitate closer to each other. While Natasha doesn’t have a problem with this, it’s bittersweet. Every time Tony casually puts his arm around her and tells another story about how they snuck into the office to match schedules and his family coos and says it’s so cute, and Sharon smiles at them. 

It stings, to be this close and yet knowing that it isn’t at all real. 

Tony lies awake at night. Becuase this is nice. All of his family loves Nat, so does he, and it seems…possible almost. To have her this close, smiling at him like she has. 

So it’s not a good idea, but he goes to her room at three a.m. She’s still awake. 

“Why are you still awake?” 

“Watching funny videos. Why are you awake?” 

“That’s why I’m here. Follow me.” 

They go into the courtyard. It feels…nice outside. Tony’s wringing his hands. 

“What’s got you so nervous?” Natasha asks. “And why at three in the morning?” 

“I think this is literally the only way I could do it,” Tony says. “Only time my family shuts up.” 

“Go for it then,” Natasha says. “You have until four, when your baby cousin wakes up. Lorenzo?” 

“Got it,” Tony says, smiling. “Um, well, I–” 

“What?” 

“Oh fuck,” Tony curses. “Listen, I’m just going to say it. I’m just going to say it.” 

“You’ve said that twice.” 

“Iloveyou.” 

“What?” 

“I…I love you,” Tony says, sighing. “I’ve loved you I think since eighth grade, and I’m now telling you because I don’t think I can just go on with life without telling you. I also realize that you’re stuck at the family reunion until this is over, so now I realize I’ve put stress on you and I’m sorry, I can fake my death if you really want me to, so–” 

Natasha envelops him in a hug. She kisses his cheek, looking at him in the dim light of the lanterns. 

“You absolute fool. I love you too.” 

It’s the first of many “I love you’s.” 

Sharon takes credit for the relationship, and Tony and Nat let her. She’s also the maid of honor and meets her future wife, Maria. 

Tony and Natasha don’t go to the same college, but compete against each other in the trivia clubs that both schools have, and so they spend other time together. Natasha shows him her favorite tea shop downtown, and Tony shows her all of the hideaway spots he uses for studies. 

(And to hide her away from Rhodey, who will tell her anything and everything that’s embarrassing about Tony.) 

Right after college, Tony and Nat move into an apartment. 

About a year later, Natasha holds out a gold ring for him to put on, asks if they really have to get married in a fancy church, and watches as Tony tears up and hugs her. 

“I told you!” Sharon crows when they reveal the rings. “I told you that you would get married!” 

“Okay loser,” Natasha says. “Then you’re the maid-of-honor. Congrats on throwing my bachelorette party.” 

“I’m making us go paint-balling.” 

Tony rolls his eyes, but looks at his now-fiancee. 

Things will be good. Aren’t they always? 

[eleanor-writes-stuff]

chemistry (my heart’s a city you’re out to destroy) - [IV/IV: EPILOGUE]

Kylo Ren - superhuman, mercenary, and the world’s most dangerous man – has recently resurfaced after a mysterious three-month disappearance.

Rey Niima, listicle writer by day and investigative reporter by night, is way too busy to worry about that. Seriously, she’s got a million things on her plate - she doesn’t have the time to think about anything else.

Especially now that news editor Benjamin Snoke has returned to the office and seems hell-bent on making her life… interesting.

At long last, the end.

Questions are answered, loose ends are tied up, and the road to recovery leads to a happily ever after.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 Also available on AO3. And hey, maybe check out my Twitter and Ko-fi? 

. . .

At the last intersection before Takodana Street, Rey reaches out to still Ben’s nervous tapping against the steering wheel.

It’s the third time in ten minutes that she’s had to do so, and he allows her to pull his hand off the wheel and into her lap with nothing more than a sheepish look from under his lashes.

“Babe, you need to relax. I can’t believe big bad Kylo Ren is this nervous about meeting a little old lady.” Neither of their smiles sour at the mention of his alter ego; after six months of difficult but frank conversations, they’ve finally reached a stage where everything is out in the open but also firmly in the past, something to laugh about now that the wounds have healed.

They’ve also reached the stage where she introduces him to the woman she considers her mother for all intents and purposes, and Rey’s spent the past week trying to assure her boyfriend that tonight’s dinner is going to be just fine. Judging by the way Ben’s fingers keep twitching in her grip, she’s not exactly done a good job.

“Little old lady makes her sound so harmless,” he mutters as the light turns green. “She raised you, Rey. You. There’s no way she’s a harmless little old lady.”

She could tease him for that, but Rey takes pity on him and decides to simply accept it as the compliment that it is. “Okay, fine, so maybe she’s not going to be some cute little grandma,” she concedes, quickly powering through the rest of her sentence before Ben can panic, “but I promise everything is going to be okay. She’s going to take one look at you and ask to keep you forever.”

He doesn’t look convinced.

In the face of everything they’ve been through, of all they’ve overcome to reach this moment, introducing Ben to Maz doesn’t seem like a big deal at all. When she tries to tell him as much though, the tapping just starts back up.

Rey sighs and stares out the window at the familiar surroundings leading to her childhood home, casting about for a distraction. There’s no shortage of shared memories and inside jokes for her to pick from, but one in particular causes a laugh to bubble past her lips unbidden.

“What?” Ben asks, sparing her a quick glance as his lips twitch in response to her laughter.

Rey shakes her head. “Nothing, just… Remember that first day at the office? I didn’t realize it then, but…” She thinks back to their very first meeting outside of his mask, to the wild look in his eyes when she bumped into him, and laughs again. “You were horrified to see me, weren’t you?”

“I could never be horrified by you,” he objects, too distracted and defensive to realize he’s turned onto her street and Maz’s house looms just down the road. “I was terrified, sure, but not horrified.”

“You say that as if there’s a difference,” Rey snorts as they reach the end of the street, only to find that there is, in fact, a difference.

She’s seen Ben terrified many, many times now – starting, of course, with the incident they’re talking about. But parked in front of her mother’s house, having arrived without noticing it and now being mere feet away from his worst nightmare – this is the first time she’s ever seen Ben horrified.

“Is it too late to turn around?” Ben asks even as she moves to release her seatbelt. “We could just tell her I got sick and we need to reschedule–”

The weathered front door swings wide open, and Ben tenses as Maz appears in the doorway.

“Too late,” Rey shrugs, and laughs as she leans forward to press a reassuring kiss to his cheek. “C’mon, it’s going to be okay. I promise.”

Ben is the first person she’s ever brought home, and in the days following Maz’s invitation to dinner Rey had expected to find herself just as nervous as he is about the whole thing. They’ve already discussed the future, already made plans to move in together, but this makes it all real somehow, feels like the first actual step towards that future. And maybe five months ago – or three, or even one – that would have unsettled her, but Rey knows now that everything is as it should be, that they’re finally ready for this.

So she calmly takes Ben’s hands and gives them a squeeze, and gets out of the car to introduce the two most important people in her life to each other with not a single hint of nerves.

“I’m home!” Rey calls out with a grin as she rushes towards Maz, careful not to slam her weight into the older, smaller woman as they meet in a tight hug.

“Always good to have you back,” her mother murmurs into her hair, and they share a quiet moment before Maz pulls back and peeks beyond her shoulder to greet the new arrival. “And you brought a snack! Come closer, Rey’s boyfriend. Let me get a good look at those eyes my daughter is so lost in–”

Ben has always worked best under pressure, and this is no exception. His nerves seem under control as he makes his way up the driveway to join them, and there’s even a smile on his face as he humors Maz and stoops down so that she can get her hands on his shoulders and her face all up in his business, one hand pushing her Coke-bottle glasses up her nose to get a better look at him.

Maz gasps and takes a step backwards, and Rey braces herself for the kind of horribly yet charmingly dirty comment only a little old lady can get away with. At least she’s warned Ben about this bit, so she doesn’t have to worry about him running for the hills when Maz inevitably comments on what good handholds his ears must be or how those lips were made for a higher purpose or–

“Ben Solo!” she croaks, one hand to her heart, and Rey swears she’s never seen her foster mother this genuinely taken aback in all the years they’ve known each other. Maz’s eyes glimmer with tears as she slowly steps closer, reaching forward to settle a hand on Ben’s shoulder once more as her other hand slowly cups his cheek and pushes his face this way and that.

Ben, meanwhile, appears to be completely frozen.

“It is you,” Maz whispers in awe as she finally completes her examination, allowing Ben to straighten up to his full height in a daze. “I would know those eyes anywhere.”

“What– How–”

Rey winds one arm around Ben’s middle when both his voice and his footing falter, planting her feet in the ground when he sags against her just the slightest bit. “Maz, are you saying… you know Ben?”

“Know him?” her mother scoffs, voice still thick with emotion as she ushers them into the house, Rey pulling Ben along as he shuffles after her. “I practically raised this boy. Broke my heart to lose you, second only to your parents I’d say.”

That snaps Ben out of it. “My parents? You know my parents?”

Maz closes the door behind them. “Oh, child,” she sighs, eyes soft and sad as she pats Ben’s arm. “Come. There is so much to talk about.”

. . .

Dinner is left untouched and forgotten in the kitchen as the three of them huddle close together in the living room, Rey offering Ben silent support and comfort as he and Maz fill in the gaps in each other’s stories to finally form a complete puzzle.

The story goes like this:

One of Ben’s first memories of Snoke is his supposed father droning on and on about his uniqueness, about how special his bloodline makes him. It’s how Ben had pieced together the truth about his adoption-slash-kidnapping in the first place, realizing sometime around the age of six that the man who poked and prodded at him with needles and strange liquids and odd contraptions all day long was not his real family.

The story goes like this:

A long time ago, a highly respected scientist by the name of Sheev Palpatine rose to prominence for his seminal work on gene editing, and his magnum opus was a test subject by the name of Anakin Skywalker, a man he had been experimenting on since infancy in order to create the ultimate human specimen.

The story goes like this:

The Knights of Ren weren’t always five. In fact, when Ben was twelve and finally satisfactory to his father, Snoke introduced him to fifteen new playmates who would be living with them from now on. Having known no one other than his father from the age of four, young Ben was ecstatic to finally have friends – friends who, he would realize in time, just weren’t the same as him. They couldn’t run as fast, couldn’t jump as high, couldn’t kick as far, couldn’t play as long – and eventually, the slowest, weakest ones just… disappeared. In time, though, the four who remained learned to keep up with him, after months and months of poking and prodding and strange liquids and odd contraptions. And so the Knights of Ren were born, with Kylo Ren – the strongest, fastest one – their natural leader.

The story goes like this:

Eventually, the ugly truth about Palpatine’s experiments came to light, and with it a dozen nameless children buried in shallow graves. Not everyone, Palpatine argued, was ready to become the best possible version of themselves. Not everyone, he said, was destined for greatness. The law had none of it, and Palpatine was thrown behind bars for the rest of his short life while Anakin went through every test known to mankind until he was finally allowed to walk free and live a normal life, complete with a wife, two kids, and a white picket fence. Until one day, the past reared its ugly head and broke something inside him – and that day ended with a dead couple, two orphaned children, and a dark secret never meant to be unearthed.

The story goes like this:

Secrets never stay buried for long.

. . .

When all of the pieces finally fall into place, when the last question has been answered and there is no more room left for doubt, Maz goes upstairs to call the Organa-Solos and urge them to make the one-hour drive over.

“I always knew,” Ben says, head in her lap as they lounge on Maz’s porch, his eyes glued to the stars while hers keep careful watch over him, “that I had a family once. But for some reason I never thought…”

Rey runs her fingers through his hair and allows him to gather his thoughts.

“All of the others, they had lives from before, lives they remembered and could go back to after Snoke,” he murmurs after a while. Rey already knows this, already grilled him about the other knights months ago, but she lets him speak anyway. “But this life is all I’ve ever known, all I can remember no matter how hard I try. I’ve been Ben Snoke for so long I couldn’t even remember Ben Solo. Rey, what if… what if…”

Ben turns to her then, looking more scared than he had the night everything came crashing down around them, and her heart aches for him, for what he’s going through, for the pain and fear and tiny spark of hope she knows all too well.

“You know, by the time Maz found me, the Organa-Solos had all but disappeared from this city.”

She keeps her hand in his hair even as her eyes stare blankly ahead, taking a minute to sort out her thoughts before she turns back to a puzzled Ben. “Growing up, everyone knew who they were. Your mother practically ran this city, and your father was nothing short of a legend. But one day she stepped down and he retired, and not long after that they just… disappeared.”

Rey lets that sink in for a moment, holds still as Ben finally rolls off her lap and pulls himself up into a seated position next to her.

“I was still so young then, I had no idea what was going on. Only that the pretty lady wasn’t on front pages anymore and I never saw the Falcon in another race on TV again. But that was five years after you disappeared, Ben. They tried for five years to find you, did everything they could to hold on, and eventually it just broke them. They gave up everything – their jobs, their home, their lives – because it was too painful without you. Because they love you.”

Ben is crying now and so is she, tears running down their cheeks as she reaches for his hands.

“And I think… I know everything is going to work out, Ben. Because they love you. It doesn’t matter if you don’t remember them, or if they don’t recognize you, or if things are awkward at first. They love you, and you’ll love them, and that’ll be enough until everything else works itself out.”

Because it would have been enough, for her and her parents, if they’d just loved her.

And it has been enough, for her and Ben, while they fix everything else.

So Rey knows, she knows, that when Han and Leia walk through the door in an hour’s time and Ben meets his parents for the first time in more than two decades, everything will be okay.

“How can you know that?” Ben whispers, hands holding hers so tightly it nearly hurts. “How can you be so sure everything will be okay?”

Rey leans forward, presses her forehead to his and waits until Ben closes his eyes to do the same. “Because you’ve already been through so much, baby. Because I know you can make it through anything. And because I’ll be right there with you, every step of the way.”

That, above all else, is what finally gets him to relax into her and release her hands in favor of wrapping his arms around her waist.

“We’ll face this together, I promise,” she murmurs against his lips, kisses him soft and slow until she can feel the beginnings of a smile on him. “You’ll make it through this, Superman.”

He laughs, a puff of air against her chin, and Rey pulls back to find that teasing smirk she’s come to adore.

“Oh, so now I’m Superman?” Ben huffs as he crosses his arms, bright eyes giving away the act.

Rey hums in mock contemplation. “I mean, you did turn out to be my awkward coworker secretly moonlighting as a superhero, so…” She shrugs, biting back a grin as Ben pulls her into his lap.

“And who does that make you, then?”

Underneath his playful smile, behind the brightness dancing in his eyes, there’s still a small, scared boy forever looking for reassurance, forever unsure about his place in this world. So Rey trades her grin for a soft smile and gently takes his face in her hands, stares deeply into his eyes until the right words come to her.

In all honesty, she’s had them ready for months.

“The woman who loves you no matter who you are – Superman or Clark Kent, Kylo Ren or Ben Snoke or Ben Solo.”

Awe washes away everything else on his face, leaving Ben with wide eyes and parted lips as he takes in her words. His breath hitches, he slowly blinks his eyes, and then finally, finally he gives her a brilliant smile for all of two seconds before she’s pulled into a kiss that says everything she needs to know.

“I love you too, sweetheart,” Ben whispers between kisses, holding her so close she swears she can feel the beating of his heart. “Always have, always will.”

The front door opens, and Maz says something about light traffic at this time of day and another forty minutes at most and–

Rey presses her palm to Ben’s heart, the heart she’s known from the very start even when nothing else was certain, and knows that together they can face anything.

. . .

And that's that, friends. After almost exactly three months - just two days shy, in fact - this story has finally come to an end. I can only hope it was a satisfying one for both characters and readers, and worth all the time and emotion you've so generously invested.

To @nancylovesreylo, I hope this satisfied you above all. I've come to love this Rey and Ben so dearly, but I know this story would never have existed without you. Thank you for this amazing prompt, and for everything else you do for this fandom. I could spend years trying to write a birthday fic worthy of you, but I hope this came somewhat close to that at least.

Once again, thank you to everyone for waiting even when all hope seemed lost, and for giving this odd little fic a chance in the first place. I hope you've enjoyed this, and as always please don't hesitate to like/reblog/comment. Until next time, friends!

[punkscowardschampions]

Savannah & Jac

Savannah: 🙌 forced family time is cancelled 🙌 hallelujah Savannah: what are we doing? Jac: Celebrating that, obviously 😘 Jac: What excuse did you use and/or what's the sitch? Savannah: Give me a guest list because honestly does not need to turn into a downer as soon as Savannah: it was a great excuse though, taking a mental health moment Savannah: school has me INCREDIBLY stressed Jac: It should be ILLEGAL how hard they make us work, though, preach 👏 Jac: Is totally doesn't get it because she isn't in the top sets like us Jac: it 👏 is 👏 SO 👏 much 👏 more 👏 work 👏 Savannah: if her mother wasn't a teaching assistant, she'd be languishing in the bottom set Savannah: even she knows it Savannah: IMAGINE if she worked at ours Jac: Seriously, ugh, she's stressing me out rn actually Jac: some of us are trying to keep good skin over here, babe, please 😬😖 Jac: She would die, it'd be bad enough having your mum be a teacher, but a teaching assistant like... 🙈 I can't Savannah: you were GLOWING when I left you Savannah: what's she done now? Jac: ❤❤❤ Jac: this is why you CANNOT okay Jac: if we are partying, we need to have such a pamper sesh first, NO ONE but you can 👀 me like this, I swear Jac: it's so typical her Jac: like I love you but the drama, and she always makes it herself Jac: she's 💔 about that boy, the one that's friends with Xav? LIKE I'M SORRY, you didn't even LIKE him before but now he's NOT available to you, hmm 🤔 interesting 💅 Savannah: Baby girl I have got you, my auntie just got this shit imported that's like next level skincare Savannah: you'll look as beautiful to everyone else as you do to me Savannah: 🚫🚫 Is Savannah: I don't know what boy she means so he's obviously not all that important, my god Jac: 🙌 Come through Auntie!!! Jac: you are THE sweetest angel, like how did I even survive before you ??? Jac: 🙄 Serious! Jac: She's definitely mad I'm over it but like, we all have shit on our 🧠 and it's frankly way more important than this non-drama boy drama Jac: you weren't out there looking for sympathy and you're actually struggling, like, why can't she be more like you, and everyone else too, tbh 😘😘 Savannah: I'm religious about this one serum, you will be about ready to die seeing yourself afterwards Savannah: & so will everyone else we invite to this party Savannah: it's no wonder you're over it, she can't let a single thing go! The leggings incident being case in point, it happened such a long time ago Savannah: but she still has to be in my face about it Savannah: Like, sometimes depressed people are slightly thoughtless Savannah: let me live Jac: I'm SO here for this Jac: you wanna come over here? Jude is out and I can easily get rid of the others too Jac: FACTS Jac: you think she'd be more understanding Jac: someone who claims to have social anxiety, remember that too? Jac: WHERE THOUGH??? 😂 Jac: I'm so much quieter than her, like, it's such an excuse with her for when she embarrasses herself or doesn't want to do something Savannah: YES to everything! Savannah: & remember when she had too many shots at Laura's 15th Savannah: Say you think I'm faking it if that's what you think Savannah: I can't cry constantly, I don't look cute doing it Jac: You ALWAYS look cute and that's like all her issue Jac: it's really blatant Jac: babe, the insecurity, it's so sad 😥 Savannah: The last thing I want is for Ty to think that I'm upset because of him when he's the sweetest and the most understanding boo ever but that's clearly what she wants Savannah: he'd be so upset if he saw me cry Jac: ❤❤ such a good boy Jac: her jealousy is so out of control Jac: I wanna help her but how is lashing out at us, her ONLY friends, helpful? Jac: why should we, sometimes, honestly Savannah: every time I've suggested a work out, she shoots me down Savannah: I can't be any more helpful, it's really beneficial & you refuse to try Jac: it's pure laziness Jac: like you said, she'd be bottom everything if her mum didn't like DO her work for her Jac: 🙄 over it, like, lowkey don't even wanna invite her rn Savannah: we could have it at mine, you know what my family get like when there's too many people Savannah: it's not personal Isabelle, it's my mum's crazy acting up Jac: See if she's gonna pop off on your mum too, like Jac: Ugh, I dunno Jac: do we give her a chance to redeem herself? Savannah: The divorce hit hard, as well you know Is, that's why my auntie lives here Savannah: Ooh what kind of chance? Jac: She doesn't get anything about real life Jac: be lucky if her mammy and daddy let her come anyway 😏 Jac: I'm thinking, okay, don't judge me for this 🙊🙊🙊 Savannah: never Savannah: you're perfect Jac: love ❤❤ Jac: So, she's made her bed by acting all salty about this boy, yeah? So, for all this nonsense, I think she needs to invite Shane and let me have him Jac: because she can't POSSIBLY be into him really if she's still hung up on this other boy? Like, that's not fair Savannah: she would string him along but we're not letting her Savannah: There's no way Shane deserves that Savannah: he doesn't deserve you either because WHO could but if you want him Jac: and actually me and him have way better chats and so much more in common Savannah: he's told Ty endless amounts about how much he likes you, bear with, I'll show you Jac: He's really cute, right? Jac: 🤭 oh my god, babe Savannah: [a million screenshots that you don't deserve to have, get off your man's phone hoe] Jac: 1000% saving them Jac: she'll act so pressed but he wants me anyway, what are you gonna do? FORCE him? 🙄 girl, STOP 🛑 Savannah: ^^ 👏 Savannah: remember when she kept walking away from Aaron & he told her to stop & like TOUCHED her arm, she acted like he grabbed her or something Savannah: double standard there Jac: OMG yes Jac: like, I swear she wants to RUIN these boy's lives, who hurt her? 🤔 it's not cute, cannot deal with girls like that 🙅 Savannah: Let the boy speak Savannah: my dad left & I'm not taking it out on my boyfriend Jac: ^^ the immaturity Jac: we're out here trying to grow and heal and be the best versions of ourselves we can be Jac: and she just... 😑 I can't Savannah: she needs Jesus & we're closer to Buddhists 👌💅 Jac: Literally Jac: IMAGINE if I was still stuck with just her and Amelia Anderson, please Jac: actually saved me 🙏🙌😇❤ Savannah: Honey, NO I will not think about it Savannah: I swear you're my soulmate Jac: It's SO true Jac: no one else is on our level, I swear Jac: you just get it Savannah: who was I & what was I doing before I knew you? Savannah: it hurts my heart to even think about past me Jac: Me too 🥺 Jac: but no one is ever gonna fuck with you again, I swear Jac: least of all Is, that's that 👋 Savannah: now I am crying Savannah: I love you Jac: I love you too Jac: we're totally taking my dad's best 📷 and having a MOMENT Jac: the world has gotta see how good we look after our skincare vibes Savannah: everything I ordered during my midnight madness has arrived & there's a dress I'm giving to you Savannah: Shane will die Jac: You are the MOST generous, best best friend ever, I can't even Savannah: how do you want your make up because we can do barely there since you'll be 🌟✨ Savannah: or you can make a statement that you're ready to go all in for him and bring that effort Jac: What do you think? Savannah: You never have to go hard with your 😇 face Savannah: there's no flaws to hide Jac: 😚😚😚 okay then Jac: that's the mood Jac: like I'm not crazy 💕 on him, or anything but he's sweet, we could be cute Jac: not as cute as you and Ty, of course 😘 Savannah: You'll feel it when you feel it Savannah: if you forced it you'd be like Is Jac: 😱😱 NEVER Savannah: she's trying to start a conversation with me Savannah: I don't want this Jac: Oh my GOD Jac: and when does she ever Jac: bet she wants to bitch about me Savannah: Yeah totally Savannah: Who does she think I am? You're my everything Jac: You can see if she does though, play along Savannah: She's started unprompted! Savannah: 'What's Jac's problem with me? Why's she being like this' Savannah: Let me say hello Jac: Wow, like, where's the 'how are you?' but I'm the rude one 🤷 Savannah: Are you okay JJ? Savannah: this is so unnecessarily mean girl of her Jac: Like, I'm so unsurprised but Jac: what's my problem, why is it MY problem suddenly Savannah: ^^ Savannah: [screenshots screenshots screenshots lol] Savannah: she's the one with all the issues, look Jac: 🙄🙄 how much of this did you just say to my face, babe? Jac: if you can't then maybe you should keep it to yourself Savannah: I feel sad Jac: 😿 Jac: we can't let her ruin our night with whatever negativity she's trying to bring rn Savannah: if she's not bringing your boy to you I don't want her around me Savannah: she has to Jac: Like, seriously, do we even invite you? Jac: Ty knows Shane Jac: I was being a good friend and essentially asking for her blessing but why when it just gets thrown in my face like this Savannah: She doesn't deserve to be your friend Jac: It does feel that way 😟 Jac: just so glad I have you Savannah: It can be the 4 of us, you'll feel so much better Jac: I think so Jac: just not in that party mood now Savannah: I'm gonna pamper you & then Shane will too, that's the mood now Jac: 😍🙏 Jac: thank you so much Jac: that's what I need rn, forget her Savannah: She can cry all she wants, I'm not interested Savannah: we're gonna have the best time Jac: We always do Jac: especially when she's not there draining our energy Savannah: Come over whenever Savannah: Ty's got basketball & then he'll be standing in front of the mirror forever post shower taking selfies Savannah: if I wasn't so secure I'd be worried about the time he spends photographing his muscles Jac: his ❤ and 👀 are on 🔒 Jac: bless him Savannah: I can't imagine being with anyone else Savannah: if he leaves me I'll be joining my mum as a wreck who stays in bed constantly Jac: He never will Jac: he's not INSANE Savannah: am I too much? I feel like I have that gene Jac: Oh please Jac: he's rightly obsessed with you Jac: you're so gonna be together forever and get married and have all the cute babies Savannah: They would be the cutest Savannah: I hate not being from a big, close family like yours Savannah: I'm gonna make one Jac: Hey, you're my sister Jac: soulsisters, right, no matter what Savannah: Yes! Savannah: We're gonna be together forever too Savannah: & our babies will grow up as best friends Jac: That will be the best Jac: I wish we'd known each other from being babies too Jac: you were so sweet omg 🥺 Savannah: Shoutout to your dad for taking the perfect amount of pictures of how perfect you've always been Savannah: 👼🏻 Jac: Some of them are so cringe though 😒😂 Jac: thanks so much, dad 👌 Savannah: my dad's head has been ✂ out of all of ours Savannah: what could be more cringe? Savannah: my mum can literally never stop herself Jac: do you have any you managed to save? Savannah: I have some she didn't know were in my room Jac: that's good Jac: you could do something with them Jac: or, failing that ✂ her head out Savannah: Will you help me? Savannah: you're like the most artistic person I've ever met Jac: Of course I will Jac: we could make a frame out of 🌷 🌹 🌺 🌸 🌼 🌻 Savannah: OH Savannah: I love that Jac: Right? Kind of everything Jac: we could get one of those fake garlands to hang all our polaroids on too Savannah: 🥰 Savannah: this is why you're in top set for everything Jac: Awh, I just like beautiful things Jac: that's why we're best friends Savannah: you're SUCH a beautiful thing Savannah: I hope you know Jac: Thanks to you Jac: NEVER gonna let you forget ❤ Savannah: Do you need a lift? My auntie is asking because she loves you too Jac: 😭😭 family of 😇s Jac: yes please 😘 Savannah: 10 minutes, baby

[addytheheartbreaker]

Yandere! Joen x Addy x Overprotective! Nicol (part 3)

(Warning: this story you are going to read will contains trigger and 16+ that involves angsty theme, mental issues, adult vice theme, mild swearing, violence, gore blood and death of the following story. Please respect and advice not to read it if you are uncomfortable of these topics)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joen's pov

Leaving my dear precious doll peacefully at her bed is such a grace to watch, it makes me feel happy on her safe state. Dying to be on my arms at my home, I started going back to the past where they are still alive.

Father is a great man with a huge popularity of his amusement park, "Great Roger's Madness Play". His reputation is so popular, everyone knows his name and his signature friendliness and kind heart he possessed. He is formally a boy band in his youthful days until She come to his life.

Mother is a famous singer and song writer in any ways. Her beauty stands out every man on their knees and woman and young girls inspired by her feminism and encouraged of young girls to chased their dreams. She work in many business with her family along with her sister who had a son to carry the legacy. Dad slowly fell in love with mom with a reason.

The letter he wrote for me and my brothers to read.

The Roger family has been passing its genes for generations with a twist of truths and secrets of our ancestors. Now that I understand why father loves mother, I guess I'm just like dad with my hair slick back, the perfect arch white rabbit and well.... The reason of loving a mate.

I'm so excited to mark my beloved as mine and mine alone. Well, besides my favorite bunny brother Leon who is the first one to finally mark his lover and soon to be brother in law in the future. Oh~ I wonder what she would look like when we were at the same age as my parents were? Or what dress she would dressed to my imaginable insane wedding that I've dreamed when I was a bunny. Alright I think I would be more then intrigued on what kind of girl if I finally see the true beauty behind all that elegant décor everyday? My guardian angel will take me to heaven to touch her, to feel her, to taste her-

To see how much she loves this Rabbit giving it to me~

Ugh, I losts control now. I needed her, I fucking need to confess my heart out and heal my beloved broken doll to a woman I ever gunna dreamed of. However, I need to be patient once she give in and open her heart for me, patient enough to let me get closer to her. Mother once told me that since she has a strong relationship with father with such love. Addy would be the most happiest girl to finally release those burden chains behind her back and healed all her broken crack porcelain that my pretty little doll possessed.

Now all I needed to do is to get rid of Nicol. I don't care of the peace contract we both had along time ago that I am about to break!

Anything to claim the Doll as my mate! That's what father told me. Finding the right mate to loved would do anything to claim it as mine. I made up my fucking mind to win this. Similar to how my brother Leon would back when we were still at the asylum. I also need to talk to my black rabbit brother for advice before I could finally kick the dog's ass. I'll do it tomorrow to prepared the plan. Nicol the Doberman Dog, our peace allies between our families is off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nicol's pov

I heard that Joen left the dog mansion quickly. Why though? I went to check on dollface if she is alright and safe. I think she is now safe.... For now....

You may be wondering why I wanted to protect her at all cost even protecting her from her mission, preventing her from activating her DEaF power eyes she had explained to my training with her, people who dare tried and harm a single hair from her and death multiple times is because of a many reasons;

She and I are no different then everyone else.... We both experience it in a horrible way....

*flashback, Nicol's traumas and Wilderness era*

The Dog brothers are not entirely as brothers who are related honestly. We were all born at the adoption withe and my little brother together until I have a strong friendship with the 4 pups. We were always together as a group because of our connection we are having and how much we grew up together inseparably. My brother will always be beside me and followed me anywhere until we all started performing and show off our created talent. We became young celebrities together until at age 11. Me, my little brother, my soon to be step brothers and my brother's siblings are all adopted by a man.

The man is my new owner, my master, the one who would take care the whole family despite we are not sure why he adopted us? Learning that the man had knew the 5 of us that we are popular of our talent and give us something that we now soon as celebrities as I formed a group of boys as the Dog Brothers. We are so happy to finally made it.... That's is what I thought of.... Right?

"Bad environment, a horrible influence of a owner, a home filled with vices and master showed me and my brothers the most wicked crime that all of us lost our innocence".

I grew aggressive and wild on these stuff. I'm so uncomfortable at first for introduced me such illegal stuff in such a young age myself. I was just 13 years old when master showed me these things. I grew slowly addicted, it is so wrong yet felt high I'm started to get used to master's drugs and alcohol

Age 14 is my start on partying my favorite clubs. My brothers are also got used to these vices as they do the same wilderness and hunting more and more. I like to fight people and greedy on devouring liquor and drugs everyday on clubs, I've earned myself a nickname as the "Wild Dog".

That is until.... The sudden arresting for illegal crimes had made us realized our whole family are in deep cursed. Realizing that we had changed to the worse which we immediately almost broke our strongest relationship that we, the Dog Brothers we once have togehter. We started arguing and fighting out of no where and I blindedly harmed my own little brother multiple times in a heated tension that I gradually said the words that I broke our relationship with my brother for eternity.

"You Bastard! How dare you offended me and my families name! YOUR A DISGRACE TO MY FAMILY!!! I'M NOT A DISGRACE TO MY FAMILY, I NEVER BETRAYED IT BROTHER!!!"

Those words are all a lie, I did betrayed them being blinded with addictions and obsessions which controlled my whole body like I'm a puppet. Crimes that added on my list while the Dog brothers are all working as celebrities as we secretly hidden our vices from public. The family doesn't want the publics eye to know these secrets which would one day torn us completely with shame

Been arrested then releasing again and again as I reached age 17.

*Imprisonment era*

"Here comes the Wild Dog! A Beast! Ooo so scary *mockingly laughs*, the lil old crazy bitch who do drugs and shit. I heard he killed a man before. He is the guy that we heard from those rumors outside, stay away from him. Such a psychopath, no loved for you and more fuck torture for you to performed. Disgusting disgrace of a family. Are the rumors are true? These rumors are for real!"

Enough! Just fucking stop! Please that wasn't me, that wasn't us!!! I wasn't myself, WE AREN'T OURSELVES!!! Curse you master!!! for making me and my whole family for losing our own innocence and our humanity to this hellhole! Go to hell you asshole!

I'm so broken right now.... I can't take this anymore with the addicting drugs and alcohol, adding crimes is one thing and yet I have almost betrayed the Dog brothers. The public has spreading rumors and news of our crime which shamed our fame and money.

At the end.... We started trying to fix ourselves and our problems to solve as we are officially released after 4 year ago of the Darkest era of celebrity, I'm 18 years old that I have already forgotten who I really am and who my friends are. I have lost my own innocence and humanity on society. Its is time for the Mcgilles Family to rehabilitated our fame, not wanting our fans disappointed and go down on us. They still loved us despite we are in deep burden from the dark time.

*flashback ended, present day. Midnight*

"Nic? Nicol? Nicolas, wake up."

I've suddenly woke up laying on the floor. Was I asleep? And I felt something wet soaking on my cheeks. I look up to see my favorite older brother, Alejandro the Jindo Dog.

"Nic, your crying. And its midnight already. Why aren't you on your bedroom?"

Ah... I think I'm still inside Addy's bedroom floor crying at my sleep as I stand up with the help of Ale.

"Sorry. I'm must have doze off when I got here."

Looking back on Dollface peaceful sleep, still in the same straight sleeping body and her stuffed bunny has dropped beside me when I first fallen asleep beside her bed. I picked up the stuffed bunny with my own hands, looking down to its innocent eyes I cried. I could feel my own body shacking as Alejandro sympathies how broken I am.

"She too innocent back when we were met.... She didn't deserve it brother.... She is as broken as I am, you and our family too."

"I know brother, I know...."

Putting back beside the owner of this stuffed white bunny to the sleeping doll as I gave a one last longing look of pity to the girl then left. I felt tired with my eyes almost shut, unfortunately.... Something tighten my chest that danger is going near. This is a bad sign.

[finderskeepersff]

63. Part 4

How did I let this happen, that’s all I can think about. I trusted a number and a name without even checking it out, why was I so careless. I gave this person pictures of me, my son and one with Cassius in it and I continued to tell them everything. Why did I not check this, I am legit angry at myself right now. I just didn’t think, stupid me didn’t think to just check the number out first, it’s my fault. I am so caught up in this bubble of Cassius and Cartier that I just don’t think of anything else, I worry so much for Cassius because I am scared he could do it again. It stresses me out, I don’t want to say that to him and I don’t want to tell my friends that but it worries me that behind my back he could do it again, I have so much shit happening and then I’m here and my son is there, I’m pregnant again. When does it stop, when do I get to hit pause on my life, I guess it’s happening now. I guess my mind has hit pause and it’s hitting me on what I did, I did wrong and I know it. I don’t think I will mention this to Cassius, he will end up being angry with me and then say I’m careless and yes I was, it’s my mother and I rather it be her then anything else, my god. I can’t get over it at all, groaning out as I placed my hand on my stomach, how can I be so stupid. I think it does worry me about Cassius, he’s in that lifestyle and he’s with that shit, he could slip into it again I mean it is so easy to do it. When he goes out at night, or even when he does. I search his pockets and then check every part of the house he’s been too, I check the car and then his little hiding spot, the cameras around the home. I am worried for him, and now I have told him this. I am a dumb bitch, that is final.

I am just staring at the ceiling, I mean I am self loathing I guess but I don’t want to move and I have probably been here for an hour now “coming in” Mia announced as she pushed the door open “come in” I mumbled, I don’t think she heard at all but she entered “we are going out, I assumed you would have been ready? We need to see more of Cali, what the hell?” She is right, I was supposed to be ready “I don’t think I want to go out” my eyes not leaving the ceiling “I didn’t ask you I told you, now move!” Mia spat “you staying here with Olivia when she is out here asking for her ass to be beat, she is also staying behind so do you want that?” I also don’t want that either “I’m a mess Mia” I am so dumb “what’s new, go on then. Tell me what happened?” Feeling the bed move a little “I was texting a number I thought was my brother and it was my mom, I never thought to ask. I mean I could have got my man killed for my stupidity but I wasn’t thinking, I am so sad! Like I sent this number my son’ pictures I mean luckily it was my mother but still, I am just heartbroken that I did that” getting up from my laying position to sit up “oh Sofia, what made you think it was ok?” She questioned “I have had so much going on, when I saw it was Leyton I was like ok anyways moving on, I just didn’t think. I am so caught up on thinking about my son and Cassius. And then Cassius is upset I went to the club pregnant, he put the phone down on me, and then I have told him about that night he was high, it’s just a mess. He knows and that could affect him going back, I am so stressed!” I barked “what happened that night he was high?” I paused “I’ve done it again” I just can’t hold it in, I bursted into tears, I can’t do this “Sofia, seriously. It’s not the end all, calm down” I can’t do it, I sobbed out crying feeling everything just get on top of me.

Mia rubbed my back, I am just a mess and I keep making the mistake of putting my foot in with everything “I am so upset with myself” I am doing everything wrong “don’t be, Sofia. You’re a young girl still, you can’t be this harsh on yourself. You’re twenty six and you’re pregnant with your second child, you’re dealing with a lot for your age. You have been through so much, you made a mistake it’s fine. Just calm down Sofia, I honestly don’t want you to feel like this Sofia” Mia is trying to calm me down and console me but I am so sad right now, and then I was about to put my foot in it with what Cassius did that night, what even is my problem “I need to take my mind off this, but I am just wondering what does my mom want? What is she gaining from this? Why does she want to know me” my phone pinged “it’s Grace Sofia, she is bipolar as fuck. One minute you’re her everything and the next you are a hoe, I can’t really say why. Maybe she is going through a phase where she loves you now? I don’t know, but also I think with her being in Barbados has calmed her crazy ass” unlocking my phone, Leyton has sent me picture. The actual Leyton and not my mom, tapping open the picture. Staring at the picture and it’s my grandparents home “awwww” my smile grew “he wasn’t lying” turning my phone to Mia “is that you?” Mia took my phone from me “forget me, it’s Cartier on the famous family wall” Mia grinned “bitch your forehead in your school picture” Mia screamed out laughing, snatching my phone from her “that is cute, Cartier is there next to me” I sighed out smiling, my son is so welcome there “maybe your mom is changing? I don’t know, can’t say” locking my phone “she doesn’t care for Cassius though, she hasn’t accepted him and that is the thing with this” Mia pulled a face “then we don’t accept her” I chuckled.

This uber driver is a pervert, he has not stopped talking about if we are single. I mean he is ok, he seems young but he does nothing but check us out “you girls here for long?” he asked “oh look at that we are here” I said as he parked up “you not slipping that number” I swear to god “I have a man thanks” opening the car door, I need to get out of this bitch “nigga bye” Mia said behind me as I got out of the car, I honestly can’t be bothered “look at that ass hoe” Mia slapped my butt “you think?” turning to her “I do think” Mia grinned “I am still hungover, don’t mind me. At this point I wish I was Sofia, she is sober as shit” I grinned fixing my bag on my shoulder “that is a good way of hiding your bump though, oversized sweathirts” Mia pointed out “I know, but my bump ain’t big is it? It’s funny because I was thinking. I was like what if I am actually having a girl, I am much smaller bump wise than I have been before” turning around as the girls started walking into the mall “could be, oh my god. Imagine a mini Sofia” Amira gasped “she will be so pretty, you got strong genes because Cartier is like you. But I love this look, you look so good. Not a lie” it’s really nothing “Cassius wouldn’t be impressed with my legs out but it’s hot” I shrugged “anyways, let’s act single for a while and go shopping” I need some new clothes.

Waiting for Mia to come out of the changing room, she is trying on clothes upon clothes, she is spending her man’ money today “and this!” she stepped out “what you think hoe” she walked over to me “I think it is nice, I love the dress. The colour suits you, I would say it does” Mia popped her booty in my face before she walked off, she is too hype for a bitch that was drunk as fuck last night “I have just one more thing to try” nodding my head as she walked off, seeing this group walk into the waiting area too, a couple and some friends also “I am going inside” she announced “I am trying this on” Amira said, these bitches. Seeing the guy sit next to me ont he couch “I will sit myself here” I think it’s his girl announced and made hweself comfortable, my phone started ringing in my bag. I mean honestly, she can keep him because my man is beautiful as fuck. Getting my phone out from my bag, it’s facetime from Cassius. I sighed out and answered, this should be quick “I am out so don’t say anything stupid” Cassius cleared his throat “oh ok, I will call back later. I just wanted to say I love you. You look nice” I grinned “thank you Cassius” I said in a whisper, Cassius is looking at everything, he just staring “call me aight” nodding my head “I love you too” disconnecting the facetime “and this!” Mia and these damn outfits.

Out of all of this I only got myself a top, I don’t know why I just didn’t want anything which is weird for me “y’all really shopped didn’t y’all?” Amira and Mia did a lot of it “we did, also we got a thing. I mean I do, when I found out that we coming here. I pulled a few strings in the clubs and we going to see A$AP Rocky, he is hosting and we got VIP so yeah that is a thing” my eyes widened “erm, Cassius won’t like” Amira laughed out loud “Cassius don’t like much bitch, fuck that. Stop being boring. You doing this with us, lie to him again. Sofia. You can’t be like this. You always obey the man, everytime. Cassius has his time but do you? And what makes is even more wack is that he got you pregnant again, you’re twenty six and you just doing this to yourself. This should be peak times off having fun, sis I ain’t fucking with that shit. I ain’t about that at all, Cassius got a problem he tells me. Why come here? For what? You can’t even drink and now you don’t want to go to the club, stop hiding in his shadow. You do this with with every man when you think they will hate something to avoid an argument, I ain’t dragging you but I am also not hearing this bullshit from you, live a little. I am not happy you pregnant Sofia, I am not your mother but I am your friend. You drowning yourself in these diapers, bitch no. You could have waited, enjoy life. You telling me Cassius is that bad?” shaking my head “just don’t tell him” Amira said “I end up speaking on it, I always do it. I already caused shit, trust me. I am not happy either” I mumbled “I am happy if you happy but sis, I ain’t feeling that happiness your way. Not like Cartier you was, I was supposed to bring this up with you anyways, you acting like an old bitch. Jumping through these hoops, you both can’t even get married right and now there is baby number 2, I am sorry. I got triggered, you just need to live a little. Cassius is this and that, I didn’t do this for that. I did it to see you and spend time with you. Be free” Mia is pissed with me.

Maybe it’s me, maybe I have made life complicated. Am I just making myself think I am happy, I mean I am happy “I am sorry Sofia” Mia apologise “don’t” I looked up from the plate and at Mia “you spoke on how you felt, you know me” Mia sighed out “I do, and I know how much you can get yourself into this bubble. First it’s your family holding you back and now Cassius. I ain’t blaming him but it’s you, please let’s not argue on this. You pregnant now and god bless but think of you yeah? Just be happy about yourself and not make it about is Cassius happy, because we know he is as long as he is with you. Am I wrong Amira?” Amira is very quiet “I do think Sofia needs to have her time, during these past four months you have done nothing but worry and be there for Cassius. You just need your time, I can agree on that” taking in a deep breath “you know what, I have finally found someone that does love me and honestly, I will continue to make it about him because that’s what love is and I will ask him before I go because that’s what a couple do, I am happy, just I have a lot on right now. Cassius needs me and if anything was to happen to me that man wouldn’t be where he is, I have a family to think about now. I really don’t care for what any of you say, I love you girls but Cassius comes first” Mia looked away from me “so if he says no then what? You going to stay behind” I shrugged “then I will talk to him about it, I want my man” I get they are worried but no, I can handle myself.

[chococustard]

((I’m really sorry if I’m becoming too annoying with asks and all that!!! U don’t have to respond!!)) Kind of random, but out of curiosity, do you have any A/B/O AU family headcanons?? I honestly would LOVE to know more about all of them!! Thank you sm!!

!!! NOT AT ALL I ACTUALLY GET SUPER HAPPY WITH YOU LIKING THEM SO HUSH YOU’RE NEVER A BOTHER ASK WHATEVER YOU WANT

legit i have a shit ton of notes in my notebook with my horrible hand writing and basically nonsense notes and while writing the edited ver a) like the dingus i am i accidentally clicked a thing and lost all the answers b) the internet dies haaah

SO YEAH THERE’S A SHIT TON UNDER THE CUT

MIDORIYAs

mido worries about his mom getting overwhelmed by paparazzi so as a pro hero he doesn’t really give off his name to the public and the name midoriya kinda just fades over time

i’m guessing heroes give birth in secluded hospitals who won’t give off their info yeah? but mido’s location got leaked somehow and yu got kidnapped by villains which then todo fucks shit up and got her back so since then they’ve been kinda worried about safety and shit

inko stands in as guardian for school related stuff most often since todo and deku are mostly busy

idk why i kinda hc todo’s mom as an ice dancer or something (look at how that boy works with ice that does not come from endeavor) she used to take the kids to the ice rink and teaches them to skate. todo still holds that place as a safe space and goes to the one a few train stations away from campus after he gets his shit together. he took deku there for their date and ends up also taking the girls there too.

rei gets out at some point, as she gets used to being in society again she stays with inko (and all might//SHOT) at deku’s old room when he got a place with todo. she gets along with them and also mitsuki. they have tea together and share embarrassing stories about their kids it’s great

yu and tsumu plays mostly at tsumu’s house which was closer to the school, they hit it off super well and they even talk about each other to their families, todo and deku are super relieved to know their girl has another friend. yu actually met mirio and tamaki already but are not aware they know her parents

so tsumu one day just “hey you wanna come over for dinner we’re having bbq you should bring your family over!” and they do come over cause why not i guess and then the 2 families meet and damn

their balcony is filled with potted plants courtesy of inko. there’s also a small bottle with a single morning glory flower, wrapped in a blue ribbon and a duck cutout stuck into the dirt

no one uses watashi in the house, yu uses boku, chi uses ore, yu calls them oka-sama and otou-sama and generally uses more formal speech while chi uses the more common -san honorific, not sure if this is relevant of anything but yeah. also todo calls deku bunny from when they started courting (2nd year)

they have a thing with nicknames. obviously deku uses -chan, but also

BAKUGOUs

baku and kiri works as partners tho sometimes kiri helps out with the fatgum office, they have an office at home and basically a small gym

meat. so much meat. there’s always meat in the fridge

baku and kyou both eat with so much fucking spice and chilli kiri’s basically kinda used to it to a point. but if they have the girls over (like when deku’s in heat//SHOT) they have to have extra of the low impact portion. one time chi took the spicy portion by accident, apparently she’s immune

they’re an outdoor family basically. whenver they can they go mountain climbing when kyou is old enough. baku’s chili peppers kept getting stolen by animals, he tries every time to blow them up

baku and kiri dated and courted first, but deku and todo mated first cause of a quirk related accident. but then they got engaged and married first because baku is fucking petty.

baku’s parents fucking love kiri he’s a good boy he’s glad baku somehow ended up with someone so great. baku however have to holds himself back to be a good boy™ to kiri’s more traditional family. he managed somehow

when baku’s parents meet kiri’s they’re shocked to find how they find baku as a charming and wonderful young alpha and they’re glad their eijiro found someone who accepted him. SO MITSUKI OUT OF SPITE INVITES THEM A LOT AND BAKU HAS TO ENDURE SO MUCH SHIT

BAD NEWS FOR HIM CAUSE THEY GET ALONG

“MRS KIRISHIMA WOULD YOU LIKE TOO SEE KATSUKI’S BABY PICTURES?” BAKU, INTERNALLY DETONATES

baku ended up basically deaf so he has to learn sign language, kiri the ever supportive bf learns too, as well as their families, and they also thought it to kyou

friday nights are mario kart nights, no holds bar

the rest of the baku squad (and camie) often visits but since they converted the extra room to baku’s office and their couch isn’t all that big they have to sleep at mido’s place, or borrow their extra futon

kiri, when asked if he wants another kid, “holy shit no it was so hard to get my body back into shape ok and also how the heck do you even hold yourself as a hero not to save people IZUKU SOMEHOW DID IT MORE THAN ONCE IM STILL SHOCKED”

when kyou got his quirk he accidentally burned his bed, then screamed to dad and pop hOLY SHIT I GOT MY QUIRK

he was so proud of it at first and shows it off at schooltho when it's found out that he has little control with it, as lava often seeps through his skin and out of his mouth at random times, almost hurting the other kids, the at first popular kyou was feared by his peers, until yu got her quirk late in the year and was able to put out his lava whenever

"you're not scared of me? even before you got your quirk?" "why would i it's not like you did it on purpose" also like she's used to baku. that goes along for years until kyou presented. yu comes over after school with meds and stuff, but kyou, out of his mind and his body out of his control, attacked her, trapping her in a cascade of hot burning lava. she managed to escape with some mild burn and they kinda got awkward for a while. they're cool eventually

however when yu presented the fear of that happening again got way fucking worse

YAOYOROZUs

momo and kyouka wants to be independant yeah, so they got their own apartment (more of a penthouse if anything) with their own money

a note, dams are gender neutral pronouns for moms, sires for dads

itsu calls momo dad, kyouka mom

since he’s mute since birth, in addittion to sign language, as his interest with music grows they make a system for basic stuff he can make with notes and sequenses as answers where he’s unable to use signs

momo however also makes a list of codes for specific teas

he carries around at least a whistle or kazoo, mostly he uses a harmonica

momo’s parents worries at first about enrolling him into a normal school but momo and kyouka themselves are convident their kid can get along with the other kids

they right, even without his connection as their kid

is he a goth? not really, he just really likes the color black

he also like birds, he has a bunch of photos and encyclopedias of birds in his room

kyouka often holds charity concerts, momo and itsu always comes to support her

IIDAs

it surprised everyone when iida, the rule abiding iida, had ochako pregnant before they got married, so with the power of the iida family they got engaged and married so fucking quick

tho really it was an accident, ocha misscounted her birthcontrol pills during her heat and they’re already courting anyway and their familes are already aware of each other and get along well so whatever

HE WAS ALSO LATE FOR HIS BIRTH BECAUSE HE HAD TO FUCKING OBEY THE GODDAMN TRAFFIC LAW

also i need someone to get me like, you see iida and ura, they cute right, pure and soft. but holy shit when ocha’s in heat she takes no shit and is basically a goddamn dominatrix

they, deku and todo shares a hero agency, so basically when tenma was born they made a baby space for him in their shared office with toys and shit and the sidekicks can play with him, they’re putty in his chubby hands. same thing happened with the tododeku kids. the sidekicks are all okay with this

there’s not many support and rescue heroes, so ocha often gets called in as an instructor at ua, she brings tenma for lessons for her students to safe

tenma likes to hang around the future heroes, he likes to play hero

“senpai senpai do you need help!” “ooh ye see i think i accidentally blew my shoe way up that tree can you get it for me?” “YES!!”

he takes martial arts lessons as early as from 3 years old, as a teenager he’s able to fight midair

TOGATAs

so like not sure yet, tamaki’s either an omega or beta so tsumu is either theirs biologically or adopted so

either way if she’s their biological kid, during his heat tamaki used his quirk when doing the dirty so the genes stick and mutates and shit

aNYWAY

tamaki doesn’t really like making appearances on tv and in public, he even rarely sign for merch deals, tsumugi often finds knock off merch of him and she likes to get it as a kind of joke cause the design was actually kinda funny, mainly this actually

she also likes to find show cameos of him, that too was hilarious

she loves hanging out with aunt nejire they often go shopping, she’s the one who bought her the knock off suneater shirt

“lol you wanna know why your dad’s hero name is suneater?” “what?=D” “tha-” tamaki: NEJIRE I SWEAR TO GOD

also like mirio totally acts like the protective big bro to eri when someone likes her

she likes buff/big bodies, mostly to sleep on, she sleeps on mirio and mr fatgum

she has a bunch of miruko merch cause she’s a rabbit and has strong ass legs and she may or may not have a gay awakening cause of that

here is, in fact, said bootleg shirt

she likes the giant gaping mount

SHINSOUs

SHINSOU’S AN UNDERGROUND HERO FIGHT ME

he teaches the hero course and LIKE HIS DAMN DAD IS A LITTLE SHIT TO HIS CLASS

so he’s the one who changed the entrance exam to make it more fair for kids with quirks that are not flashy his, so the robots are then deligated to the recomendation exam kids while the regular ones gets a basically game of hide and seek with his hero buddies and the older students

i actually have this for his hero costume back from goddamn january i dont even know

i, i have nothing for fuyusei they met at the hospital and they hit it off and that’s….. it

i have even lESS SHIT FOR OJITOORU

ALSO LIKE I FUCKING LOVE THE IDEA THAT ALL MIGHT RUNS A VILLAIN REHAB FACILITY OR SOMETHING WITH ALL HIS MONEY, YOU KNOW, FROM BEATING VILLAINS TO SAVING VILLAINS, AND LIKE INKO HELPS WITH TALKING TO THEM IM WEAK

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Killer Queen (Girls Talk Boys Part 15)

Authors Note: This song has been stuck in my head all day so I had to use it. I want to thank anyone and everyone who’s read my writing. I am a thirsty bitch so any and all feedback and questions are appreciated

Caviar and cigarettes Well versed in etiquette Extraordinarily nice

She's a Killer Queen Gunpowder, gelatin Dynamite with a laser beam Guaranteed to blow your mind Anytime

Warnings: smoking, drinking, swearing the usual

Previous Chapter

First chapter

Camille couldn't breathe and she was afraid she was going to piss herself. It wasn't healthy to laugh this hard while wearing Spanx. She had to give him credit. Tom had really come through on the costumes. Cher's idea to go as Bob's burgers was fucking brilliant. She and Cody were Linda and Bob with Nick as Gene. Lucy was oddly sexy as Louise, but Tom dressed up as Tina was what had her in stitches.

“I am a smart, strong, sensual woman” Tom even had the voice down.

“Stop, seriously I can't do this right now. The knee socks. I can't” Camille couldn't stop laughing.

“Camille, we need to get your hair put on” Lucy, bunny ears and all, pulled her up the stairs with Tom following behind. Camille wasn't a part of the Bob's Burgers bunch. Instead she and her boss teamed up as characters from Steven Universe. Stephen was going as Steven, and Camille as Rose Quartz. Lucy helped her get into her big fluffy pink and white strapless dress. The three of them then went to work on her hair. Two separate clip in pieces attached to give her volume and long flowing pink ringlets. Between the dress and the hair she looked a bit like a drag queen coming out of a wedding cake all tits and pink curls. Camille even had to admit she looked cute.

It was a little after 9 PM. They were determined not to be the first group there so they hung out for a bit catching a pre party buzz. A round of shots and a blunt. Camille was elated she was finally feeling healthy again. She was absolutely mortified she'd gotten sick in front of Harry. He'd been an angel. Not only did he get her home and to bed, for the second time, he'd taken her notes and handled the party details until Ashton came home. Tonight was the first time she'd see Harry since that day.

She hadn't really gotten to see any of the boys since they got back from Europe. The exception being Calum who had come by the morning after he'd given her the gifts to make sure she didn't need anything else. She'd stayed wrapped in her blankets hiding her face. He'd lounged on the opposite side of her bed, at her strictly enforced distance, telling her about the tour and how he'd found each of her gifts. Camille winced remembering the torture of having Calum on her bed and not being able to touch him. They carefully avoided any serious discussion talking mostly about places they'd traveled. Camille kept asking him questions about places they'd both visited. Only while Calum toured in person Camille had only explored through books. He'd stayed for about an hour before Camille started to get sleepy again. Getting up to leave he'd turned and pounced on her. Scooping her into his arms he'd buried his face in her blankets under her chin. Camille couldn't resist reaching her fingers out to stroke his neck and his jawline. The many nights she'd fantasized were nothing compared to Calum being right here. She was glad she was swaddled up so he couldn't hear her heartbeat pounding or see how flushed she was getting. They lay there like that without a word before he'd kissed her between her eyes and left.

Cher almost lost it when she walked into the party and saw Harry dressed as Squidward. Tom REALLY came through on the costumes. Harry for his part openly whooped seeing the Belcher family.

“You guys look spectacular” Harry hugged her with four tentacles.

“No seriously that's something else” Cher stood back eyeing him. “Where's Spongebob?”

“He'll be here later. I'll have to introduce you.” He leaned in to whisper “ I heard a rumor you might be single.”

“I was always single” she whispered back.

Harry just nodded and winked at her “of course, I have to find someone but Calum and Luke are around here somewhere and I'm pretty sure I saw Ashton in the kitchen with the food”

Harry pulled Tom off with him somewhere into the crowd.

Cher caught sight of Luke and she elbowed Cody. “Check it out, it's Bat-Luke.”

Cody laughed and pointed out Calum dressed as Robin pacing back and forth “and his boy wonder.”

Cody watched as Nick and Lucy greeted Lucy's friends who'd shown up dressed as the Powerpuff Girls. He recognized one as the girl who'd hooked up with Ashton at the last party. He saw Cher's face and knew she'd recognized the girl as well. Cody made a note to keep track of this one.

Pulling Cher aside he nodded towards another party guest “Do you see who that is?”

Cher looked back and her jaw dropped “Cody is that really? Wait until Camille sees he's a person and not a salad.”

“Will you stop being stupid?” Cody hissed. “I found out he's got a new show and his costar just happens to be my ex.”

Just then Calum locked eyes with Cher and laughing hysterically he jogged over.

“Holy shit you look fucking incredible, all of you” Calum told them hugging Cher and Lucy nodding at Cody and Nick.“Although I'm never going to see Louise the same way again.” He glanced behind her. “Where's Camille?”

“I see how important we are to you Cal. Speaking of important where's the booze?” Cher teased him.

“In the kitchen. Hey do you know Luke invited uh, a guest?” Calum looked nervous

“I didn't, while I appreciate the heads up I'm fine with all of this, I promise” Cher told him. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah I'm just, fucking hell, ok so Ameena kept calling me earlier and when I finally answered” Calum suddenly stopped and Cher saw his eyes light up. She was positive she'd never seen anyone smile like that.

Camille had arrived. She'd had to wait for her boss and his girlfriend so she could bring them over, but also she liked to make an entrance.

“Camille you made it” Bat-Luke appeared at her side. “That costume is perfect. You look so pretty. Cal isn't ready for this.” His blue eyes twinkling behind his mask.

“Luke” she gasped and hugged him. “Oh I've missed you sweet boy. How is everything?”

“We'll talk later. There are other people who need to see you first” Luke gently grabbed her shoulders to turn her around where Calum was coming up. Camille caught sight of him in his costume and her butterflies were back in force.

Robin had never been a sexy character but hot damn Calum was making it work. The sleeves were super short allowing her to see every tattoo on his muscled arms. Her eyes dropped down sucking in her breath surprised at how sexy Calum's thighs looked in leggings. Realizing where her thoughts were headed she tried to focus back on his face only to blush at the intensity in his gaze. Between the bulge in his leggings and his expression Calum made no attempt to hide what he was thinking.

“Can you two please try to restrain yourselves a little” Michael and Crystal appeared breaking Camille out of her thoughts.

“Hi you guys” Camille hugged them both “oh my God y'all are the cutest ever. Wanda and Cosmo? That's too perfect.”

“I can't believe you came as Rose Quartz. It was made for you. You look great.” Michael told her.

“Who did your hair? I fucking love it.” Crystal reached out playing with the pink curls

“Tom and Lucy helped. They're clip ins. I'm lucky I got the hair first thing way before I got sick.” Camille told her glancing back towards Calum who was now talking to Cher and Cody but still looking at her.

“I hope you really like him” Camille turned back to her as Crystal spoke. “I'm not taking sides in this, but he's gone through a lot just to take a chance with you.”

“I didn't ask him to” Camille felt defensive but she couldn't pretend to be completely innocent in all of this.

“I don't think he had a choice” Crystal told her. “He fell for you pretty quickly.”

Camille shook her head. “I don't know about all that. He's still young. I'm not anything special.”

“To him you are.” Crystal replied. “So please be careful, he's been hurt enough lately.”

Camille felt her face get hot. She felt a little responsible for that. If she'd walked away from the start she could've saved Calum from some of this misery.

“Hey” Crystal nudged her “I'm not trying to make you feel bad Cam. Look how happy he is right now.” They both looked up and when Calum caught them looking he excused himself from Michael.

Calum shyly approached Camille. She had this effect on him sometimes where he got so nervous. He found himself intimidated by her, and she had no clue. Just like she'd never believe him if he told her how beautiful she was right now.

Taking her hand he raised it to his lips while bowing slightly “You look like a queen tonight, your grace.”

Camille could not breathe. How could this man be real? How could this possibly be happening?

“Thank you kind sir. Royal or drag?” Camille raised an eyebrow. She cursed herself for being sarcastic when he was being so sweet.

Until she saw his lips twitch up into that smart ass grin he'd perfected.

“A little of both really. The hair is really something else.” Calum replied.

Camille bit back her usual snark and instead planted a light kiss on his jaw just beneath his ear. “Thank you” she told him.

Cher watched them from across the room. They both looked completely smitten. She'd never seen Camille look happier.

“Yeah they're gorgeous but can we talk about how cute you are in those glasses Linda” Luke's voice startled Cher out of her reverie.

“Very funny Bat-Luke” Cher giggled.

“I brought you a drink” Bat-Luke held up a red solo cup that smelled of watermelon vodka and cranberry juice.

“Leave it to Ashton to steal Camille's recipe” Cher hated this awkwardness between them. Scanning the room she turned to him “I thought your new girlfriend was coming tonight.”

Bat-Luke took a sip of his drink “she's not my girlfriend just yet, but she's here already. Summer is Andy's assistant. She's taking photos tonight.”

“I'm sure she'll be thrilled you're talking to me” Cher quipped.

“She knows about you. I've been honest with everyone. Can I get credit for that at least?” Luke looked slightly irritated and a bit wounded.

“Luke, I don't want things to be weird between us.” Cher told him.

“Nothing has to be weird. Just two friends having a conversation dressed as two cartoon characters. Totally normal.” Luke winked at her.

“Check it out Spongebob and Patrick have arrived.” Cher pointed across the room where Harry was greeting his friends.

“Holy shit that's Liam and Niall” Luke choked out a laugh.

“Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me? Hoohah!" Ashton abruptly joined them causing Cher to almost spill her drink laughing.

Ashton as Johnny Bravo was hilariously appropriate. He looked smoking hot in tight jeans and a tight black t shirt.

"I bet your name's Mickey, 'cause you're so fine. You're so fine you..."

“Ashton there you are” Camille came over to greet him with Calum in tow.

“Camille or should I say Rose” Ashton leaned in for a hug. “You look stunning sweetheart. Calum's a lucky guy”

Calum and Camille both blushed and looked at each other with adoration.

Ashton, Cher and Luke all exchanged little “awwww” glances.

The moment was interrupted by an alarm on Calum's phone suddenly going off drawing the attention of everyone around him.

“Is that your home alarm” Ashton peeked over his shoulder as he shut off the alarm.

“Yeah my back door is open.” Calum looked confused.

“You think someone broke in?” Cher asked him.

“Not so much as I'm worried Duke got out.” Calum shook his head still confused.

“What is it Calum?” Camille reached up to caress his face so he'd look at her.

“I have the weirdest feeling. I don't even remember setting the alarm” Calum kissed her hand before letting it drop. “I really do need to check on Duke.”

“Do you want me to come with you?” Camille asked.

“Yes, but if you do and I get you alone in my apartment we won't be coming back to this party.” Calum kissed her lips gently “I'll be right back I promise.”

Calum left and Ashton nudged Camille in the ribs “You two are so gross you know that. Too mushy for me.”

“Shut the fuck up Irwin” Camille shot him a smirk. “You should really show Cher where the booze is and bring me another drink.”

Ashton chuckled and bowed towards her “your grace”

He went to Cher and wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"You look pretty...I look pretty...why don't we go into the kitchen get a drink and stare at each other? You can watch my chest hair move in slow motion.”

Cher was giggling as she followed Ashton. “don't get too drunk too early.” Camille called after her.

“Mommy doesn't get drunk, mommy has fun” Cher called back.

Camille made her way back to Luke. “Is that her?” She nodded towards a pretty dark haired girl holding a camera lingering on the edge of the crowd.

“Yes actually” Luke motioned her over. “This is Summer. She's Andy's assistant/apprentice.”

“You must be Camille” Summer extended her hand.

“What gave it away” Camille smiled at her.

“The pink hair and I saw you with Cal. He's mentioned you more than a few times.” Summer looked nervous until she glanced at Luke and Camille could see the spark. “I have to go find Andy. I'm so glad I got to finally meet you Camille.”  Summer disappeared back into the crowd.

“She's cute Luke and she seems very sweet” Camille nodded at him watching him relax.

“I wanted her to meet you first. She's more nervous about Cher.” Luke took another drink before cocking his head and laughing. “Check it out Camille it's your favorite rapper.”

Camille scrunched up her nose “You know I can't stand Drake. He's a total fuckboy and this is his fuckboy anthem.”

“You know all about them fuckboys don't you Camille.” The venom in the tone of voice made both Luke and Camille whiplash towards the sound eyes wide.

“Your little boyfriend Quentin? Diamond do you love me? Ajayani are you writing? I'm not surprised you couldn't keep him satisfied. If you think for one second just because you lost your man you can make a move on mine you'd better back off bitch.”

Next Chapter Attention

I have a fetish for him in this picture I don’t even care who knows

@biba3434 @vfdsstuff @babygirlcashton

[fictionalnormalcy]

Continuing the tag game: at least 10-15 people

Tagged by the wickedly awesome @kingofthewilderwest- muchas gracias! 

Are you named after someone?: No, as I know I am not. I have never heard my parents talk of relatives who share my name. To my knowledge, I have my given name because it was my father’s turn to choose. 

When was the last time you cried?: Cried for real? Like tears streaming out of my eyes with the weird wavery voice? Hmm, a day in late September. I had finally allowed myself to break down.

Do you have kids? No, but I do plan on having some far off in the future.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? I use it more often than I think, but my sister makes me feel guilty about it. Says I wouldn’t even pass the entrance exam to sarcasm school.

What’s the first thing you notice about people? I notice their eyes and their facial expression. I can see their apprehension, their eagerness, the faint glimmer of their eyes before they smile. I try to pinpoint their shade of iris, because the eyes are the best facial feature, in my opinion. 

What’s your eye color? My eye color is a warm chocolate brown. I share this gene from my mother, but if I have a child with someone who has green, blue, hazel eyes, or also brown eyes but they also have a heterozygous gene, chances are that child will be born with another eye color other than my own. I will be insanely jealous. I love my brown eyes, but I find that I don’t like having a common eye color.

Scary movies or happy endings? Considering the “scary movies” I have seen do not qualify as horror movies, I am going to say I prefer a happy ending. But still preferably, where there isn’t a freaking kiss at the end! Every movie, I swear to goodness! 

Any special talents? Talents, yes. Special? I really don’t think so. Someone else can always do what I can, and they’re usually noticed far more than I am. Umm let’s see, I can read a full page of a book in a minute. Not textbook, like a fictional book. I can balance either a pen, pencil, or fork on my finger and have it spin around my finger while I shift my hand.

Where were you born? I was born in a different county than my sisters, in a town called Los Alamitos. But I was only born in a hospital there. I’ve never lived there. The city I’m in now I have lived in my whole life. 

What are your hobbies? Obsessive writing and reading. I swear, it has consumed my life. Before I used to make craft bracelets or make bead bracelets or play computer games, but my life has literally narrowed down to this. I am either constantly on Wattpad working on a draft of my various books, slowly altering a Tumblr analysis (usually based on a book or show), or reading whatever fictional book I can get my hands on. I am constantly asking myself why I even bother with college classes when all I’m really focused on are my books. I’m really only taking the goshdarn classes so I can get to creative writing and hone the skills I’ve got.

Do you have any pets? No I do not have any pets. Not at the moment. When I finally move out I plan on adopting a dog so I can get myself used to living with a pet. I like dogs, but I feel bad that I don’t spend enough time around them.

How tall are you? I really hope I have stopped growing, because I find that my height is being commented on or cause of judgment more and more now. I seem to currently be at 5′7, one of the tallest in my family.

What sports do you play/ have played? For a long time in my life, I played basketball. To this day, it is still one of my favorite sports, my only problem is that that I have no one to play with anymore. I was actually going to do it for my high school team, but last minute I was pushed into cross country. Completely screwed me up for running ever again. I can’t do a single mile without a throbbing pain in my abdomen. I then did track & field, where I found I was very good at pole vault. I did try to do it the next year, but later dropped out because the coach got a little too creepy. Then I found my passion, and what I was surprisingly a natural at was tennis. I freaking loved it, and I spent three years doing that, and rose to be the top player on my team. Like basketball, I would continue to play if I could find someone who liked playing too.

Favorite subject in school? Hmm my favorite subject? When I think back to my school years, there was never really one I liked more than the other. The ones I showed the most dedication too was my drama class. I was only in the annual school play for one year, my final high school year, but I was on the crew for the other three. Acting truly marvels me, and I would have actually studied that in college had it not been for the constant telling that studying acting for a major would get me nowhere. 

Dream job? My dream job, which I know isn’t quite possible right now, is creative writing. I was always a dedicated reader when I was younger, there was hardly a time where I wouldn’t have my nose buried in a book. It wasn’t until I reached the end of secondary school that I realized I could weave my own tales as well. This life of endless book and animated movies with fantastical worlds had created a very vivid imagination in my head. I’ve known for my entire high school career that I wanted to be a writer. I had developed my mind into an analytical one, where my stories were my own perception of how I viewed the world, and I want people to have a peek into my innanical imagination. I hope that one day I get to publish my manuscripts, and that people come to love the worlds that I have created and have practically made them a part of! 

Tagging, if you endeavor to do it:  @demiods @water-writer-witch @citatious @churrodotcomm @this-one-guy-over-there @jackieslifeisnotgood @dreamwishstar @zer0kitti0  @dragon-wolfie @inhonoredglory @thepotatoreader

[ebonyeverstern]

Paradox (Kol)

Kol’s whole body trembled as he watched the video for the nth time. It played on the small screen of what they had called a “laptop”.

Mortals these days with their inventions.

Moving on to the video that played on the screen. It was a woman of [H/C] locks and foxy [E/C] eyes. To Kol, she was the epitome of perfection. To Kol, she was the angel to his devil. To Kol, she was the anchor to his sanity. To Kol, he was hers and she was his.

The woman began to talk, starting off with a smile. She sat on the fountain rim of the compound. 

“Mikaelsons.” 

Kol could see her shaking in spite of her efforts to seem happy.

“First off, I would like to apologize for the fact that I can’t say this to all of you personally. I’m sorry I had to put you through the trouble of learning how to use a laptop.” 

She laughed a little at her attempt to make a joke (it did happen in reality though). One couldn’t see the obvious sadness and pain that she tried to hide if they did not know her so well. 

“I’m going to skip the pleasantries, because if I don’t I swear I’ll end up giving up.”

She abruptly looked up, biting her lip.

Kol immediately recognized this habit of hers. It happened usually when she didn’t want to cry.

“Damn it, I’m not even a quarter through and I’m crying.” Her voice quivered already as she managed to control her tears and simply attempting to smile.

“Okay. Let me start properly.” She took a deep breath before releasing a shaky smile. “There was, or should I say, is a family full of beautiful people. They’re so damn beautiful it should be a crime. I’ve always wished I had some of their genes. Maybe that way I could look half as good as them.” She chuckled.

“Let’s start with the oldest one I know. Elijah.”

“Dear old noble Elijah. Always a gentleman. Always the one for manners. But underneath that noble facade was a man who could devote his soul to anyone but he himself. We never could do anything about it. But it always amazed me how Elijah kept pushing for the redemption of his family, especially Klaus. I won’t delve into the centuries.” She took another deep breath before looking at the camera with glassy eyes.

“Elijah, you are my big brother. The one I can always count on. The one with the strong shoulder if you want to cry, I. Love. You. So. Much. But please, give yourself a break for once. Let Nik go and tend to yourself first. I love that you love your... Our family, but goshdarnit we’ve been waiting for centuries for you to get a life. So now that Hayley is there, don’t let her go, aight? I’ll be watching from the other side. And if you don’t chase Hayley, I swear I’ll come back and haunt your ass until you do.” She smiled lovingly before laughing.

“Now for my hybrid brother Klaus. I love you as well.”

“First things first. I do not give you permission to slaughter anyone. Please don’t. Really. Don’t. No matter who they are, don’t. Consider it as my death wish. Please.” She begged with sincere eyes. 

“Moving on, Nik was always the most deadly one. Even when I didn’t know he was a hybrid, I could always feel this.. sort of.. feeling from him. He was also the most caring, the one with the silliest ideas,” She laughed. “I remember this one sloppy guy hit on me and groped me. Next thing I knew, Nik compelled him to dance on the table tops of the bar. That was one of the funniest memories I’ve had with him. But he was also perhaps the most sensitive.”

“Nik, I know you’re facing a lot of problems, and I’m probably out of my place to say this, but the fact that you’re watching this means I’m de–”

Kol resisted the urge to slam the laptop and throw it against the wall with all his might had it not been playing your beautiful face.

“–ad.” [Y/N] laughed it off. “So it doesn’t matter. Anyway, please try and trust your siblings and don’t ask too much of them. Even as original vampires, they’re still humans with hearts and emotions. As for you trusted ones, I won’t blame Nik if he stakes all of you if you betray him.” She simply shrugged.

“Next up.... Rebekah Mikaelson.”

“There are no words to describe how absolutely freaking perfect Rebekah is. With her golden locks and tan skin and have you seen her body? I have and it’s the embodiment of flawlessness. I won’t deny that I’ve always been jealous of Bekah and that she’s caused me to have insecurities, but I’m happy with and for her nonetheless. She is my sister and my best friend who I won’t exchange the world, the universe, anything for. Same goes for all of you.” She smiled brightly.

“For all of you men planning to hurt her, I will come back from hell and tear off your limbs one my one before dragging you to hell with me.”

“Moving on, dear Bekah, to put things simply, you are the angel of the family. You’re the most affectionate, most human, most motherly and the most flawless woman I’ve ever had the pleasure to know. Those shopping sprees you always took me on? I loved every single moment of them. Not because I come home with a lot of pretty clothes and jewelry, but because those were the times we got to bond the most without the idea of death looming over us. I love you so much.”

“Now, Hope.”

“Hey there you lil’ devil! I’m so sorry Auntie [Y/N] can’t be there for you physically, but always know that I’m there for you by heart and by spirit. Goodness, I sound like an old woman.” She laughed softly. “a few centuries has finally taken toll on me... Anyway, honey, you are the glue for the family. Even if I haven’t seen you yet, I already know you’re gonna be so amazing. It runs in your blood.” She smiled even wider and laughed even more. “One of my biggest regrets right now is the fact that I won’t be able to see you grow up into the spectacular woman you’re meant to be. For that, I’m sorry. So do your aunt a favor and bring home a hot guy alright? Don’t worry, I’m sure Hayley and Bekah will protect him.” She laughed once more.

“Speaking of Hayley, GOSH I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a brave woman aside from Bekah. She’s the type of girl who stays so selfless and courageous even through thick and thin. She’s the epitome of girl power. Hayley is a perfect role model for Hope, aside from Bekah of course. But I’m pretty sure Nik, ‘lijah and Kol wouldn’t like that.”

Kol could sense the slightest crack and pause in her voice when she mentioned his name.

“Hayley, I know that you’re involved in all the Mikaelson drama. But I do encourage you to stay. Because aside from all the awesome once-in-a-lifetime adventures you get to have, ‘lijah will be a mess if you don’t stay.” She laughed. “I’m counting on you to raise Hope well and fit to the social standards of today, ‘kay? I don’t want her being bullied just because she can’t use an Iphone.”

There was a long pause.

“Now, Kol.... Mikaelson.”

“Kol Mikaelson is....” [Y/N] couldn’t even start properly as she burst to tears immediately. She attempted to calm herself down but it only resulted to more tears.

About 2 minutes of the video were spent on [Y/N] calming herself. She ended up with red puffy eyes and a quivering smile.

“Okay. Kol Mikaelson is a hysterical psychopath. He is a playboy, the typical bad boy. The abomination.”

She took a deep shaky breath.

“Kol Mikaelson is the emodiment of imperfect perfection.”

“Kol Mikaelson was, is, and always will be the love of my life.” She took a shaky breath in. “And the most painful thing that I’m experiencing right now is knowing that I’ll have to let him go.” She cried silently in her hands, before staring at the camera with tears running down her face.

“Kol, love, I want you to know that I love you so freaking much. I love you to the stars and back times infinity. You have my heart always and forever. I can’t even bear to think about the fact that I’m never going to see you again without bawling my damn eyes out.”

“I love you so much, that I’m finally letting you go. Nothing hurts more than the idea of you leading a miserable life full of rage and rampage because of me.”

“So I’m giving you an order. After a few months, I want you to pick up a nice girl, flirt with her, and fall for her and live happily with her. I don’t think I need to tell you to make her fall for you as well. Also, be a good uncle to Hope.” She was crying more than ever.

“I’m going to be blunt. Giving you permission hurts like hell. However, like I said, nothing hurts me more than being the cause of your pain.

“So here’s my final message for you Kol. I love you so much. I love you so so much I’m willing to give you up for you to be happy. I love you so so much because you’re so handsome, hot, caring, affectionate, playful and so much more. You’re just perfectly imperfect. I love you because you’re you and there’s nothing I’d want more in the love of my life. Once again, I say it. I love you Kol Mikaelson. I love you. You are my paradox. And I love you.”

“For all of you lot, please, for me and for the sake of the world, don’t break up. You’re family, always and forever right?”

The video ended with a smile. However, there was static before showing a picture of the Mikaelsons with [Y/N] then a picture of [Y/N] with a pregnant Hayley.

"I am [Y/N] [S/N] and I am proudly a part of the Mikaelson family.”

The video ended.

Kol had his head in his hands, tears freely flowing on his face.

“I Love You.” Her words rang through his head.

He felt so much pain and sadness as he sat there. He felt so much regret. Why wasn’t he there for her? Why wasn’t he able to save her?

It had already been a few months, but he was far from emotional instability, much less emotional stability. 

However, he wanted to honor her request. So he stood up, flashed in the bathroom, splashed cold water on his face before wiping it with a towel. He took a deep breath and ran off to Davina with an aching heart.

(This is set immediately a little after Hayley is with the Mikaelsons. So basically, Kol isn’t supposed to be in town yet because.. Well... He’s dead. So basically, this is how it plays out. Reader dies during some sort of attack which I’m not revealing :P so reader actually dies before Kol is revived. When kol is revived, his first on his agenda is to go find reader but turns out reader is dead. So he watches the video over and over again (which he stole for a little while. Even so, Kol was forced to do the stuff he did with Davina because of Esther. So everything plays out as is. I’m sorry if I got the timeline wrong. But this is basically how it played out in my head)

(part 2? Anyone?)

(update: originally the the title was oxymoron but I thought that was the contradictory statement and so I concluded that paradox was the contradictory pair of words so I changed it but turns out I was right all along -.-’ )

[hopeduckling13]

Find My Way Back To You: Chapter 13

Summary:  Hope Swan-Jones is the product of the product of true love and her true love, so her having very powerful magic was always in the cards. Luckily she lives in a town where everyone is very familiar with magic, so nothing can go wrong, can it?

Or so everyone thought, but then one day as a newborn Hope accidently travels back in time with her mother Emma.

How will the past population of Storybrooke react to their Savior having another kid and being married? And more importantly will the Savior and her baby daughter find a way back home to all of their loved ones?

- - -

Catch Up:

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14857127/chapters/34395467

FF.NET: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12964592/1/Find-My-Way-Back-To-You

[Prologue] [Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 12]

--- PAST EMMA’S POV ---

 Emma leaves me alone with the baby – my baby if we’re being specific. I’m tense as hell and for a moment I just sit there with the crying baby in my arms – not daring to move for a second or even breathe properly. I refuse to look at her. I try my best not to start crying. I even begin to sweat a little. I swear I’m going to have a panic attack every second now. You could say I’m terrified of this little baby, which sounds ridiculous but it’s true. I might not be afraid of the baby itself, but about having her in my arms and about how perfectly she fits into them. I have no idea how to hold a baby though, so it doesn’t matter if she fits well into my arms or not. I feel like if I move for just a second I’ll accidently drop the little one and she’ll get hurt badly.

Also, I’m scared, that if I hold her tightly in my arms and look at her, I’ll somehow bond with her. That’s the reason I never held Henry after he was born. I never wanted to risk loving him then – not more than I already did anyway. And it’s the same with little Hope right now. I swore to myself that I’ll never fall in love again – my keychain necklace being a daily reminder of that. But I obviously will love someone in the future – Hope’s dad – and somehow, I still want to change that. Emma did take some of my fears for the future away, but not all of them. Not even closely. I still don’t want to ever fall in love again because love only causes pain in the end since everyone leaves you at some point.

So, I don’t look at Hope now, because I know that I’d instantly love her – she is my daughter after all. I already love her too much now. I felt that when I learned of her existence. I ran away, but that wasn’t so much because I hated the thought of her. I did think that at the time, but deep down I never despised her. I always loved her just like I always loved Henry. Before he brought me to Storybrooke there wasn’t a single day I didn’t think of him – wondering whether he was okay, whether I should’ve rather made the selfish decision, whether I’d ever get to meet him, whether he’d forgive me in that case. The list could go on forever, but the only thing that matters is that I always loved Henry – every single day we were apart. And now I’m scared the same thing will happen with Hope. She will leave me once Emma figures out how to get back home. I might be able to see her again in a few years or so – Emma doesn’t look much older than me – but who knows how long I’ll have to wait for Hope? Sometimes people don’t really age. It’ll be like my life between the day Henry was born and coming to Storybrooke all over again. I’ll be miserable without ever admitting it to myself until the day I’ll see her again. I’ll constantly worry, and I’ll constantly miss her.

Or will I? Emma also plans to enact a forgetting spell or something like that to preserve the time line. So, I won’t actually remember meeting my future daughter, will I?

I can hang out with her now and get to know her without feeling nothing but heartache once she leaves. That’s pretty cool. It also means, I can look at her. I haven’t really done that yet.

I drop my head and look at my baby’s face for the first time. I’m overwhelmed by it and feel tears burning in my eyes. I won’t let them stream down my face, but they’re blinding my vision. She’s so beautiful. And her sad eyes right now, which are red and puffy from all the crying, make me incredibly sad. I wish there was something I could do to make her happy again. But the other me is working on that right now, so I should just enjoy my time with Hope for as long as it lasts.

I softly stroke her head, while I continue to look down at her in awe. I smile softly at her. She looks at me with her bright blue eyes, while she keeps crying. But I almost don’t notice the crying anymore because I’m a hundred percent focused on her. I’ve kind of drowned out all sounds. The station and everyone else there fade completely from view.

She’s an adorable baby, even though she has been in a bad mood for as long as I entered the station and have been present here. It probably started before that, so it could’ve gone on for hours. I don’t mind it though because I’m far too distracted by her cuteness now that I look at her. She has some blonde hairs on top of her head and is wearing a little bow around the head. She’s also got my cheekbones, which I got from my mother. It must be a very strong gene. As I said before she is quite beautiful and so are her clothes. She’s wearing a pink onesie with little purple anchors on it.

Her most striking feature are her eyes though. All the tears probably make them seem even brighter, but there’s no doubt that she has the prettiest eye color. The eyes somehow feel very familiar to me, but I can’t quite place them. It’s a very notable color, so I would probably remember seeing it in Storybrooke. That doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a person I stare at regularly – not that I ever check out anyone. I pretty much find everyone in this town annoying as hell – except for my son and parents and maybe Granny and Ruby. For all I care everyone else can go back to where they come from: The Enchanted Forest. Especially the dwarves and Regina. She’s working with Cora again, so her so called redemption can’t be real. That makes her a danger to Henry since he’ll always trust her. No matter what she does. She is his mother after all – even if it’s not by blood. I don’t think she would really hurt him directly, but she’d hurt everyone else, which would also cause Henry pain. He’s a sweet and caring boy. He loves almost everyone in this town. It’s one of the qualities I love about him.

And judging by the reason Hope is crying, it’ll be something I’ll love about her, too. She is crying after all because she misses her daddy. He seems like a great person, which in addition to Hope makes me fear the future a little less.

Speaking of Hope’s dad, did Emma find the recordings yet? I look up and search the room for her. She is kneeing next to the diaper bag and looks at her phone. So, I suppose she didn’t. But it won’t be long now.

I lift Hope up and hug her, while rocking her softly.  I whisper into her ear in an attempt to soother her a little. “It’ll be okay soon, Hope. Your mommy is going to get your daddy here in no time.” In a way at least, but maybe this will work for the time being. The baby does calm down a little at the sound of my voice and the mention of her father, but she still cries. I feel bad for her. I do know what it’s like to miss someone you love. I’ve done it with Henry for ten years.

I decide then, that I should go to the store later to buy a little plushie for the baby. It might take her mind off missing her home and the rest of her family. And then tomorrow I’ll do everything in my power to help Emma find a way home for them. Ten years ago, I had to give Henry away despite the pain it caused me. I had to give him his best chance. Now I have to do the same for Hope. She’ll be happier in her own time line, so I have to put my own happiness aside for a moment and do what’s best for my child. I swear I’ll get her home no matter how hard it’ll be – even if it’s the last thing I do.