#I may add more in the future or edit if I see mistakes

[distorted-digitality]

I just had a realization about Neon Genesis Evangelion.

I had always appreciated the attention to the atmosphere and the world, the way certain silent scenes would drag on just to let the atmosphere sink in. At first I assumed that was simply artistic choice, but it may have to do with the premise of the anime itself.

At the last episode, it is extensively mentioned repeatedly how one's perception of the world they live in quite literally makes their reality, since one can only glean their version of reality from personal experience.

I believe by drawing out those particular scenes they were trying to draw attention to the reality and perspective that Shinji crested for himself.

Overall to him, the world seems chaotic and bleak, filled with objective suffering, and people who hate him (though that is an incorrect assumption on his part.)

But what is brought to attention repeatedly is the emptiness, the scenes where he's laying in a hospital bed isolated in a white room, where he's waiting at the train station to leave where he used to live, and many other scenes with the same feeling. It's almost always these moments of near nothingness that are drawn out.

I think this is a way to portray his emotions of deep emptiness and loneliness from not knowing his true self, having few people he feels he can trust, and the self imposed isolation he has from staying emotionally distant from others.

[kazumiwrites-fanfiction]

Accidental Confessions

REQUEST: I FINALLY THOUGHT OF MY REQUEST May I request Azul, Jade and Riddle getting high because of mushrooms for some unknown reason and confessing to a gn reader bc their ability to stay composed just went completely out the window? It's more of a fluff/crack idea I came up with, sorry if it's not too clear @thehollowwriter

SUMMARY: When the usually cool and composed guys accidentally confess due to... Some interesting foods. WORD COUNT: 1.3k

WARNINGS: Mushrooms (need I say anything else), maybe OOC, Jade and Floyd and Azul shenanigans, they may act like they're under the influence of drugs (no actual drugs in the story though!!), these poor guys (please give them hugs), Ace is chaos A/N: Me, trying to make sure I get everything right: *types in Google* "what happens when you get high" on my school computer Don't do drugs guys :D (I would've said kids but I'm like 96% sure that most of the people reading my fics are in fact older than me) I love how I finished this a while ago and then was like "I'm gonna add a bit more to the end" and it was only like a paragraph- Azul is my favorite, you can see from how much I write for him </3 Also I love fluff and crack, I enjoy writing it the most! Feel free to send more requests like these <3

© kazumiwrites - All rights reserved; please do not steal, edit, copy, repost (etc) my work without my express permission.

Azul Ashengrotto

You know, Azul should have known better.

Jade always went out and got some mushrooms on his hikes, and he seemed pretty confident that he knew the different types of mushrooms.

But one single mistake - a mushroom similar enough to a perfectly fine edible one - and now he felt woozy.

Great.

It wasn't an unpleasant experience - he felt happy in that dreamy way, where you weren't able to comprehend much. But he knew this was bad.

What if he got addicted? That would ruin all his plans for his future. He needed to have a clear head.

He really should've been resting, but unfortunately, Floyd had ran off (most likely so he didn't have to be near the mushrooms). Due to that, Mostro Lounge needed an extra pair of hands.

So when he saw you, he immediately was on guard as much as he could be. Who knows what he could let slip when you were so close, and his thinking wasn't at its best…

He tried to avoid you, but unfortunately (again? Why were so many bad things happening to him today?) you sat at the table closest to him.

He had to go up to you and take your order. Your sweet smile almost made him melt, a soft flush on his cheeks as he just nodded quietly, jotting your order down.

You thought it was odd - Azul was usually the type to chat people up, try to get as much of a profit in as possible - but today was different. It made you a bit worried, honestly.

As you asked if he was all right, Azul's eyes widened.

His mind went blank, and the only words that left his lips were, "Sorry, you were just really cute, and I-" He froze as he realized the words he said, trying to backtrack, but he couldn't think right. "I mean, I just thought your smile was- you- I-" He shook his head slightly. "Forget it," he said, hands shaking slightly out of embarrassment as he turned and walked away.

As Jade had been watching and listening to the interaction, he quickly made your order before handing it to Azul (who had been hoping for some rest behind the counter before seeing you). Jade was saying something about how Azul really needed to be quicker with processing orders - Azul was pretty sure that Jade knew about his feelings toward the Prefect of Ramshackle Dorm.

Azul sighed softly before trudging back to you, the food and drink you ordered held in a tray. "There you go."

As you inquired about what his previous words had been about, he saw the teasing glint in your eyes.

Did you know?

"It was nothing- I just like you a-" A slip of the tongue. Damn it. He hadn't meant to say that. He quickly backed away before almost sprinting to the VIP Room, his cheeks flushed a bright red. He almost ran into the doorframe though (which Jade may or may not have taken a picture of).

Bonus:

"I told you that Azul likes you a lot." Jade smiled, a small glint of his teeth showing. "Did you plan this?" "Jade might've given Azul an unusual mushroom~" That sing-songy voice had to be Floyd's. "I knew it." You rolled your eyes a little. "That was cute, though. Although your method might have been a little mean. Poor Azul." "You can go talk to him after you enjoy your meal." Jade smiled at you. "And Floyd, you haven't had anything to eat. Perhaps you would like one of the mushroom soups I've made?" "No- I've had enough of your mushrooms." A soft whine came out of the other tweel's lips. "But maybe Koebi-chan wants some?" "Thanks for the offer, but I probably should go to Azul as soon as possible." You laughed softly. "There's no telling what's happening to him right now, after all."

Jade Leech

Jade had a heavy mishap on his hands. He had gone a bit overboard with picking his mushrooms, and then Floyd had gone and messed with his careful labeling.

And then he didn't check the contents and labels thoroughly before he put them into a little snack for himself.

So now here he was, stumbling to Ramshackle Dorm for no reason in particular.

It was a wonder how he hadn't stumbled off the path, what with the hallucinations he was seeing.

He stumbled inside (luckily the door wasn't locked), quickly moving to your room.

At first you thought he was Floyd due to how off he was acting. But nope, that was definitely Jade.

"Jade?" Your eyes were wide as you stared at the male. "What are you doing here?"

"I love youuuuu." Well, that was a surprise.

Now you were really wondering if this wasn't Floyd. It sounded like something he would say.

As the tall male draped himself over you, you awkwardly tried to get both of you comfortable on the small chair. It was no use, however, as you toppled off of your chair and onto the ground.

You let out a soft huff, staring up at Jade who had fallen on top of you. How fun…

He seemed to have fallen asleep, relaxed on top of you. Well, at least he didn't seem to have gotten hurt.

You awkwardly patted his hair as you gave up trying to move. The floor was uncomfortable… But you could bear it, you didn't want to stop looking at Jade's sleeping face.

Riddle Rosehearts

Ace, the prankster he was, had put in an insane amount of sugar in some cookies he was making. He had then given the cookies to Riddle.

The unsuspecting Riddle had accepted the cookies, feeling a bit confused. Why was Ace making cookies…? No matter.

He was starting to eat some of the cookies when you had been brought to the Heartslabyul dorm (totally not by force).

You were also confused, and for good reason. Ace was saying something about pranking his housewarden, but to be honest? What reason did he have for calling you here?

You were pretty sure it was just so Ace didn't get punished. He didn't want to keep getting in trouble, after all. Though, the rational thought would be to not prank Riddle at all… But oh well.

"Hey, Riddle," you said, feeling a bit uncertain. You smiled a little at the male.

"Oh- hi, kantokusei." The red-haired male blinked at you, looking confused.

"Yeah, so- Ace dragged me here? I don't really know why, but-"

He paused for a heartbeat before replying. "I don't know why he brought you here either." He sighed softly, shaking his head.

"Well…" You shrugged awkwardly. "Are those cookies any good?" You gestured vaguely towards the plate in front of him.

"They're too sweet." Riddle frowned a little. "Ace has no delicacy in doing these things, he thinks more is always better."

You let out a soft laugh. "Sounds like him." Just as you reached for a cookie, his hand brushed past yours.

He froze, cheeks flushing adorably. All the sugar in his system was making his heart race and not be focused on what he was thinking.

Before he could even question it, he grabbed your hands. "…I like you a lot." he got out before freezing yet again, hands still holding yours. Why had he said that?

Little did either of you know, Ace was wheezing behind the closed door. He had put in a small little potion, nothing major, that caused a person to say what they felt to the person they liked. He had gotten it from Azul, and it clearly had worked.

The deal had been worth it to get blackmail on his housewarden. Now, if only he could somehow use this to get rid of Riddle as housewarden and all of his strict rules… That would be great. Maybe he could even actually win?

As always, reblogs and comments are always appreciated! ♡ Send your thoughts grr

This post has details for requesting, and I also currently have a writing event going on here. Please check it out!

[peculiaritty]

Sunday character study/trauma study

Again! before i start this ramble there is tw for religious themes, abuse, mental illnesses (ocd especially) and grooming so please if you have any triggers regarding those please don't read ^^ 2.2 Penacony spoilers so please be warned and future leaks and/or theorys may be involved. NO future storyline leaks though. This might be split into parts- not sure! Things might be hyperlinked and these will count as my reference/evidence, theres no need to read them unless you're curious!! There might be a part two on this when Sunday does come out ! Edited 18/05 to correct mistakes/add things i forgot about it OK. Lets begin: GOD. Poor Sunday, i think a lot of people has seen Sunday's abuse unnoticed, and i honestly can't blame some people because sometimes we don't automatically pick up everything unless we are actively looking for something. Sunday is a very interesting character, and i don't necessarily think he is 'evil-evil' per say, he is more of a morally grey character rather than being right up evil. Some major pointers i want to bring up and will be discussed: -> neglect, emotional abuse and the grooming of Sunday by Gopher Wood AKA dreammaster. -> The 'family' dynamics and attitudes -> Sunday/robins ideologies -> headcanons, character design choices and religious imagery (Not a deepdive into the imagery!)

-> neglect, emotional abuse and the grooming of Sunday by Gopher Wood AKA Dreammaster.

The most clear thing we can see as of right now without any reading between lines- Robin and Sundays bond. They care for eachother very much, we know that Sunday is the eldest brother, we already know that from right off the bat, that he is indeed the protector of Robin. Such as any older sibling usually feels towards those born after them. Sunday in no doubt in my mind has firstborn syndrome, basically the main 'burden-holder' between the two. This is the first fact we need to understand before we delve in. Due to Sundays natural-protectiveness of his sister that leaves Sunday at the face/brunt of Gophers ideals, which means sacrificing himself at any cost. Which may be why Robin remains currently unaffected or/not as self-destructive as Sunday. One thing that is easily skipped over and not noticed, Gopher and Sunday share a completely transactional-non-familial bond as they seem to not have the common father-son bond what so ever, Sunday only refers to Gopher as master which hints at the wedge between them. Gopher has ever only inspired and encouraged Sundays pessimistic behavior, such as when the Charmony Dove fell, we can assume that both Sunday and robin are extremely young at the time, i position them to be around 6-8, while at this age children do start to grasp that death in permanent, in no way should a child i quote be saying anything along the lines of "i think people believe birds are meant to fly...because they've never seen those birds crashing to their death." while this 'kind voice' (Gopher) does seem unbiased and passive, there is no reason unless you have actively convinced and taught a child to think that way. While children do come to gain their own beliefs, and ideals, siblings usually remain with the same ideas and beliefs until they reach around 10-12 where puberty starts. The belief gap at such a young age between Robin and Sunday is too big for it to be just "growing up" most if not all children take joy in being naïve- and cheerful. it is only when we come to abused, groomed, depressed and neglected children we start to see such pessimistic behavior. Sunday does have first-born child syndrome, it is also a bit of a worry of how stoic and 'unfeeling' he is. He doesn't confine in anyone, and while yes, we could say this is normal- but in normal, healthy environments people always have someone to confine in. Sunday doesn't have that. This could purely be just his personality- as some people are simply coded that way. It just strikes differently when we compare Child Sunday unto his adult self, as seen in Robins trailer BOTH of them had artistic aspirations, and even though there is no 'heavy' implication, that one tear indicates to me that Sunday was indeed the more emotional one. Growing out of hobbies is normal, but Sunday is lacking of life, he generally looks lifeless. He could've grown out of them, but what I read between the lines is extreme shaming and guilt. The need to be 'perfect'. Just so he could be the 'sun' in the sky and maybe even please Gopher.

Another thing to point out- his OCD yes. This is another thing that is hidden but only few people have found. In this scenario i am not fond of actually just saying its because of his connection to Ena. i am more fond- and find it much more reasonable that it has impacted and grown from his trauma. While i will not clarify which i believe he has since thats leaning more into headcanon territory. Unhealthy childhood environments and events predispose and increase the risk of various psychiatric disorders and OCD is one of them. It is clear that Sunday has been indoctrinated and been taught to think the way he does now. The family is cultish and it doesn't seem to act as one, everyone has their own ideals- and motives, including Gopher. Grooming does not have to be sexual in order for it to be considered grooming, grooming is defined as when someone builds a relationship, trust and emotional connection with a child or young person so they can manipulate, exploit and abuse them. In this scenario, Gopher has essentially groomed Sunday to exploit him and use him as a sacrifice. Groomed and abused, religious abuse seems to be a big one in this especially considering the huge religious imagery in Penacony, but it is important to point out some common symptoms of religious abuse is doubtful faith and compulsive perfectionism which resemble in Sunday. Most times, religious abuse is often paired with other forms of abuse, most commonly being sexual grooming and emotional abuse. This does not leave other forms of abuse out such as physical however. Gopher has 'trained' Sunday to think this way (Sundays ideaology), and indoctrinated him for his own use, and you can see it in Sundays extreme ways of dealing with his belief. there is clear there's an external force in his thinking- Gopher.

-> The 'family' dynamics and attitudes To continue, the family- as again, all have very different ideals, and motivations in Penacony. They act as completely separate entities yet still collaborate with each other. One thing remains crystal clear to me, that this family- follows a royal family sort of dynamic, where everything is hushed, you mustn't be too emotional, or too illogical. Basically coming to the point where Sunday has directly been told to not worry about Robin. He was never allowed to grieve. He is not allowed to grieve which is a horrid thing to be put through. Even when Gopher does deliver the news of Robin being shot there is a lack of care, and concern, he sounds non-chalant, going on to mention, "once you've attended to your outstanding tasks…" In any family emergency of sorts, that's the last thing you want to be told, you want to be there as soon as possible. Gopher wood simply does not have enough care, or concern for both of his 'children.' While this is my pure assumption, i do have reason to believe that the Family does share a rather cold dynamic, such as any other usual dynamic that is seen in stories where there is a political, rich, or royal family.

lack of care towards children, and moreso encouraging less 'child-like' traits

Parental figures primarily not being involved in the childs care, it is most likely that both Robin and Sunday were raised by the servants of the house, while Gopher remained some sort of mentor towards the both of them.

Isolation from other children in different life scenarios/circumstances

- Most often, children in these scenarios get put into a protective bubble, unaware of the outside. henceforth, another reasoning why Sunday might be so scared of the outside world. -> Sunday/Robins ideologies Both of them are entirely separate eachother belief wise, but they have one goal in mind. Helping people. I would describe Robins ideals as being quite idealistic and soft, that has come to her naturally, and its quite sweet. she wants world where people can live how they want. Even if its a bad one. Sunday on the otherhand quite thinks the opposite, i would describe his as: 'To protect everyone, keep them safe from pain, and suffering, their freedom of choice must be taken so they will suffer no longer, even if that means sacrificing all that i have.' This comes on very intense, as he does you know. send an entire star system to sleep!! But, His idea isn't exactly wrong. As in those questions he posed to us- we would've done the same if we were in the same scenario. Of course- if one of our siblings we knew were going to get shot in the future because of the path they chose- we would do our best to do that. It makes sense. But logically, and emotionally speaking, it is not in our best interest to control other lives and what they wish for, and what they dream for. What does Sunday want? Nothing. he is entirely swallowed with trying to help other people. He has no dream for himself. His dream- is others peoples dreams. What Sunday wanted, out of the goodness of his own heart, and the unfortunate abuse he has been put through, essentially what we call a utopia/dystopia. IT IS utopian to think of a world without pain, with harmony, where everyone is happy. But because of our nature as people, we want choice. so to us IT IS dystopian to think of a world were we have no choice, were we live on autopilot always content. He seeks escape, and he's not ashamed of it. The most common reason people seek escape, is because they're scared. They are scared of facing what they need to face. He is scared, he does not wish to see pain and suffering, he knows and purely thinks things are doomed from the start. Its almost nihilistic. And i understand it. paired with his childhood, Gopher and how he gets stuck in the confessional box hearing the most horrendous things, i would be like him too. "is this apart of your plan?" It is Gopher who brought the order to Penacony. That line above, implies that this wasn't Sunday's plan at all. Gopher was going to use Robin in the first place, but Sunday, again, being the oldest took the forefront of the indoctrination and abuse- thats how he now blindly believes in it. Gophers plans and his reason why hasn't been revealed. but i doubt it was because he genuinely cared for his people. It is depressing to see who Sunday is as a person, purely pessimistic, and so lost but obsessed with his belief, but to me and other people he is relatable; to him, things don't get better. he wants to stay in the moment. Suspended in a dream that is too perfect to be true. He seeks escape, escape for everyone. Things do get better, whether that is now, or later. We just need to keep trying and continuing on, no matter how tiring it is. -> headcanons, character design choices and religious imagery (Not a deepdive into the imagery!) UP TO MY FAVOURITE BIT!! ok, heres something that genuinely makes me want to explode, because if this is on purpose it is brilliant. Pointed out by Matchua and i actually think the first to notice it. his wings look clipped.

They don't seem very oval and/or similar to how normal bird wings would look. This can also be seen in Harmony MC's splash art too, the Raven being Sunday, and of course, the Charmony dove, Robin.

While the birdcage imagery is used on Robin, i think it is so damn powerful that if this is a deliberate design choice, that Sunday has been clipped. Depending on the clipping, it renders birds unable to fly until they grow back, and even then there is horrendous people out there who permanently injure the bird by clipping it wrong so its never able to fly again. A birdcage has a key. But once you take away a birds wings like that, it cant fly. It represents how Sunday can never seemingly become his normal self again, he will always be consumed by his pessimism and fear for the world around him. how there is seemingly 'no hope' We know that Robin is not clipped because in her skill her full wings pop out (even if this is just an effect...still) It also represents how damaging abuse is, how it takes away someones dignity and freedom. Religious imagery!! i'm sure you can find some super deep dives into it but i think one of the main things is how Sunday represents Jesus from the Christian bible. The thorns across his coat tie in deeply with the fact that on the crucifix, Jesus was given a thorn crown which was used to belittle and mock him. Sunday falls back in the crucifix pose. He is the sacrifice. Not exactly to purge them of sin, but to give them an Eternal paradise. (which in Christianity, is what the purging of sin does, it gives us an eternal paradise next to God.) Headcanons: -> i believe Sundays OCD to either be of the Religious, Harm or Order OCD. i see all three occurring, but rather more on the Order/Religious side. -> Sunday is a people pleaser, no buts!! -> He has alot of shame and self hatred towards himself for wanting things, as he believes it doesn't make him 'perfect' -> He strikes me to have some form of anxiety, again this can tie in with the OCD -> His small/awkward chuckles are just him trying to cope, i feel like he does it alot more when he is anxious though, towards the end of the quest he doesn't chuckle, which officially means hes lost it (lmao poor guy) -> Very scared of making mistakes. Really small ones too. (as you find in some abuse victims.) -> jealous of his sister but he could never come to hate her, he just wishes he was able to participate in being creative too but i do think he was shamed for that, for being 'childish'. Robin was the 'jewel' of the family. Sunday never was. -> as some abuse victims do, he probably never understood or came to understand that Gopher was abusive to him, maybe after 2.2 possibly. And when he does come to understand God. He's got a lot of healing to do in himself. A lot of anger, grief, sadness- tons of processing. -> He doesn't like hugs at first because he was really not hugged as a child, but when he does get hugged it absolutely destroys him because he really really loves being validated and being held. Something that he lacked so much as a child. -> As birds do when their stressed, Sunday plucks the feathers out of his wings, which leads to him being insecure about them so he never really shows them, which is why he keeps them neatly folded Infront of his waist and hides the back part of his wings with his coat. -> Forgets to eat, drink and bathe due to working so much. He gets so lost in his work he's probably stayed up for more than 48 hours. (ok like i know its the dreamscape but listen.) -> I didn't add this into the first part, but including all of the other things i mentioned, Sunday was alot more quiet/introverted as a child as i interpret him to be, while Robin was more of a blabbermouth. So thats why Gopher decided on Sunday instead, lesser chance of anyone finding out about what he was teaching. -> Never had a day of rest in his life. He needs a break. That's pretty much all i've got to say though (i'm going to spare you from my headcanons i have on his behaviors. that list is LONG.), i just think Sunday is a really interesting yet heartbreaking character at the same time. Very relatable to alot of people. He's not genuinely evil. Just severely misguided and hurt. Thx for reading <3

[thatdeadaquarius]

-vine boom

I probably sent a lot of these now im so sorry lmfao 😅

You mentioned in one of the asks that some countries are like a prototype/based of our existing countries, like Germany=Mondstadt, Liyue=China, Inzauma=Japan....

So even though the language is more or less identical for you to make heads and tails in a conversation or writing in a book, the reverse side does not.

Creator!Reader who knows a couple of languages (plus points if they're atleast fluent or have a understanding of it despite not being able to speak said language) and being born from a country that doesnt have the same language as the countries Teyvat based off. Basically Spanish, Italian, Filipino, Scandinavian languages that also have their own way of writing.

Imagine feeling homesick and the only thing that keeps you occupied is the notebook and pen you have while the others converse in a meeting or in a hangout. You started writing in your tongue and re-reading it to relive memories.

Zhongli, AlHaitham, Albedo, Jean, maybe the Berry bros too (Diluc & Kaeya) get curious only to have a double-take and immediately thinks that maybe there is a forgotten land in Teyvat that has this language, I mean Morax stayed faithful to Liyue and Barbatos blessed his country with abundance of supplies and freedom. Teyvat gods and archons played favourites, so why wouldn't you as well? (Bonus: Khaenriah flashbacks) (also I know these arent enough characters but how should I know? I only have a handful of them and I ran out of Primos😭

The people from Akademiya though? I mean they went hard on theorizing and picking apart the language of their creator. Have you seen Matpat's descent to insanity the more FNAF continues to push out LoRe? Thats basically them because Teyvat doesn't have a country based on Creator's birth country. They're grasping nothing but air and dead ends and the only lead they have is you, but couldnt ask because you look so down and they cant bear to see Creator sad....

(NEW BANNER TOMORROW AND I DONT HAVE ENOGH PRIMOGEMS HALP---)

Rip Vine boom no primos 🙏 hope u got some more by this time bc i was so late to reply lol - DUDE IM SO READY FOR THE GORG KAVEH <333

BERRY BROS!! Thats it, thats the only way im gonna refer to them now.

Not super long to add onto ur bc UR SO SMART AND SUCH A GOOD WRITER VINEBOOM U SHOULD ALSO WRITE STUFF SO I CAN GO OBSESS OVER UR WRITING WITH A MILLION FERAL COMMENTS-!!!

(Cute owl house gif is like, metaphorially u and zhongli in this lol)

EDIT 8/23/23: So this may be inaccurate/not that good to my Hispanic Readers out there! Sorry about that, I'l make sure to do better in the future.

EDIT 1/1/24: Unfortunately there are even more issues here, and I'm really sorry about that. I expanded on it more in my Eldritch fanfic post in Part 2, but it was exoticism of me to use the word "Huangdi". I have since replaced it with "Emperor", and don't intend to just erase the mistake like it never happened. But I did change it in the headcanons for better readability. Again, I'm genuninely sorry about this, and will absolutely be watching out/doing better in the future. I hope you understand.

THIS SOUNDS SO SAD, LIKE THIS COULD DEF BE ANGST, ESP SINCE U HAVE NO FAMILIAR-ISH CULTURE TO TURN TO-

tbh im american and i def dont think theres a u.s. country- oh god at least I hope not, damn but im also familiar with mexican culture so i wouldnt miss the united states, but id miss mexican culture…

BUT!!

You have a lot of amazing people who care about you in Teyvat, so they won’t let you stew in ur homesickness for long

like random said, i could see it being small stuff

ok so imma just-

LATINO! READER TIME BABBYYYYY

(i do this bc its just the culture/language im more familiar with, but dont let that discourage anyone from requesting other cultures! I will def do my research, or ur welcome to tell me all about it so i can write it better! <3)

THAT BEING SAID IM MOSTLY WHITE PLS LMK IF SHIT IS WRONG/SPANISH IS WRONG BC IM STILL A BEGINNER MY BELOVED LATINES!

<3 YOU GUYS

♡

you’ve been in the game-turned-life world of Genshin Impact for nearly 6 months now, turns out time isnt wonky as hell like it is if you were playing the game, half bc u bribed Albedo with answers to his many questions about you if he figured out the time difference, and half bc of ur internal clock

people would notice the cuss words first lmao

like Xiao hearing u stubbing ur toe on the million and one steps up to Wangshu Inn, hijueputa!

or Keqing pointing out the words you coo at the dogs hanging out by the bridge outside the harbor,

un perrito tan buenoooo!! :’)

while most would just, " hmm, maybe a dialect of one of the other countries we havent heard…"

but Zhongli? he’s been ready for centuries in case the prophecy came true within his lifetime, afterall, many things changed while he’s been alive, not crazy to him that you might descend randomly

While everyone else was unprepared, bc u were like… the oldest deity, more legend than history, so ppl just thought Morax was a little overly faithful …so when it actually happened,, Morax was just smirking as he watched ur golden shooting star streak the night sky… while absolute pandemonium consumed the mortals and adepti in liyue lmao

(like that scene of Regina George in Mean Girls watching the student body break out into an all out brawl just smirking 😭 pls god look it up if u dont know what i mean- )

So Morax- Zhongli, has been ready for you, just in case, to pay attention to what kind of person you’d be, learn your favorite clothes/colors/offerings, see what things you’d like to talk about with him (hopefully for hours) etc.

He was observant, and with his memory, he practically gave himself headaches sometimes with how aware he was,

on one of those days he was overwhelmed by the mortal crowds, the smells, the market yelling, and all the change from what he thought he knew-

Zhongli noticed you in your own melancholy, and curious, he began to stroll just behind

You sit at Wanmin restaurant, still somber, and ask Xiangling to

“please try out these recipes? they’re from my world, and id really love to have something like them again..”

a true experimental chef as always, Xiangling quickly takes up your offer, and u follow her into the kitchens in the back (the restaurant is much more real than in game, they have gorgeous inside seating, all shades of red coloring the walls and lots of pretty latticework-)

Zhongli takes a seat finally, he has a usual table at this point he comes in so much coughtorunintoyoucough the staff know it's his and give him tea pretty quickly

the food, and the looks, makes it your favorite restaurant in Liyue, the Liuli Pavilion a little too fancy for casual dining, afterall, Zhongli would know

He’s tried to keep track of your favorite places to be in Liyue too, and kept his near full attention on what you say when he asks after your stays in Liyue (he hasn’t felt the need to pay that much attention or felt that much interest in conversation partners in… decades?)

So when you come out of the kitchen, throwing your head back and laughing, "Sí, sí! It all tastes so close Xiangling! Gracias, thank you!"

He wants… to know.

to know what those strange, but delicious looking, foods are all balanced on two big dinner plates

Xiangling carrying whatever you couldn’t just behind, a pitcher of white liquid, it smells, like cinnamon?

He raises a hand, and offers the extra seats at his table, (when did his tea go cold? he only just sat down, he couldn’t have spent that long thinking about you…)

You notice and look over, a giddy grin lighting up your face (…hmm, perhaps he needs to transform into his Exuvia form and let off some steam, his chest has warmed too much right now for him to just be sitting here…)

You plop into the seat beside him, but not before carefully placing the plates in front of both you and Zhongli

You scootch around until you’re turned towards him, as always, Zhongli looks… actually kind of, happy?

a small soft smile pulls at his lips, his eyes half-lidded as they meet yours, his usual red eyeliner framing his monolids perfectly, he looks like he’s been,, well, sculpted from stone, an artwork come to life

“…My Emperor? Could I trouble you to tell me about the dishes before us?”

the geo god’s pleasantly smooth and deep voice felt so soft asking you that, like he didn’t want to push you one direction or the other

“Oh! Right! Sorry, these are from my home country, back in my world, or at least, as close as Xiangling and I can get to them!”

Your smile brightens your face once more, clearing away any leftover stormclouds from your mood earlier, and as you launch into explaining (Xiangling had to get back to orders, so it’s just you two now)

You list it all, the quintessential: quesadillas, empanadas, tamales, chorizo (you had to combine at least 5 different spices to Mondstadt sausages to get anywhere close to the real thing) the dips obviously, salsa, queso, guacamole, and the easy street tacos, and finally the horchata, but also all the weird fruits Teyvat has with chile, like Sunsettias mixed with Harra from Sumeru or Lavender melons with Wolfhook berries… all surpringly pretty good

(the Sun-Harra combo tastes like mango, a sort of deeper taste of pineapple/kiwi and a sort of light orange taste? all with the nice addition of chile flavors, the Lavender melons and Wolfhooks helped imitate chamoy enough that your heart was satisfied)

…you realize you’ve just been talking about the last meal you had with your family/friends instead of the food after a bit, and Zhongli hasn’t said anything…

you trail off and look back over your shoulder (u were practically about to get your shirt in the imitation guac u were leaning so far over the table to point and talk)

you’re about to sheepishly apologize for taking over the conversation, and ask if he wants to try anything (Zhongli can handle spice so u dont have to worry abt that at least)

but as u finally see his face, u just stop, and dont end up saying anything

He’s just, looking at you.

his smile's not huge, but big enough to make his eyes look happy, and Zhongli’s just… looking at you.

You can’t describe the look he’s giving you, but you suddenly feel… a wave of shyness wash over your heart in your chest, because he’s looking almost like, maybe like, he’s sort of, waiting for you to keep talking, his tan skin warm in the golden rays of the sun beginning to set, you don’t know why you’re noticing any of these things, and he gently, slowly, makes a move to lean into your space a little

almost above your armrest, head inches from your shoulder, he finally moves to stop looking at you-

He looks like a painting as he looks down, his eyelashes almost sitting on his high cheekbones,

you have to move your head to looking at the table too as he moved so close,

you feel your shoulders reflexitively hitch upwards as you brushed the hair on the side of his head as you turned away

He looks around, and then moves his head, not his body, he’s still leaning toward you, to look you right in the eyes again

“Why did you stop? I haven’t said much, I apologize, but it’s only because I wanted to hear you without anything interrupting you.”

You cough a little strained, “Oh! Oh I get it now yeah, thanks-”

“I want to hear you more,” his black eyes begin to warm with gold, you can vaguely see the shape of his diamond pupil revealing itself, “I want to hear about… everything, if you’ll tell me? The language, the food, the drinks, your family, your dances, your country, I want to hear it all. Won’t you please let me hear your voice some more?”

♡

GOOOD LOOORDDDD, ITS SO LONGGGGG IM SO SORRRYYY 😭😭

OKAY IM MOSTLY SORRY THAT THIS SCENARIO HAPPENED??? IDK WHERE ZHONGLI CAME FROM- GOD IM SUBCONCIOUSLY IN LOVE WITH THAT MAN I GUESS, SORRY RANDOMANTICS-

uh, hope somebody got anything out of this, sorry abt the length, again,

also pls somebody tell me if what i said about culture/food was alright! If not I’ll def change it, pls dont let me keep it up if its inaccurate/wrong!!

Safe Travels you guys,

💀♒️

.°•.☆.•°.

♡ the beloveds ♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk

[sparkanonymous]

Let's get one thing out of the way; I messed up.

If you want to go more in-depth, read this post. If you don't want to, here's the jist of the situation: For the last year - I think - I have been coloring Raj's skin tone lighter. This is completely and utterly my fault.

I'm not going to make any excuses, in fear that it will give others an excuse for their own deplorable actions. Though I don't see myself as a racist person, this is still an example of colorism, and I can't stand by it.

Total Drama is something I hold dear in my heart, and Raj is one of my favorite characters in the entire series. The fact I did him this dirty makes me never want to draw him again.

I'm so sorry. All I can do is apologize, and that's definitely not good enough. I will do better in the future. I don't want anything like this to happen again, and I won't let it happen again.

There is nothing I can say that'll fix this situation. I have disappointed myself and hurt an entire community of people. I hope I can eventually make up for my mistakes, but I know that isn't possible in a short amount of time.

I don't expect this to be taken lightly; it shouldn't be. If this is the last I see of some of you, I hope you take care.

The rest of this post directly responds to parts of thesicklycowboy's post.

○■○■○

For this portion, I have also edited Raj's hair to be the correct color. (I didn't know where else to put this part, sorry.)

I won't be responding to everything, as I do think the post was well-spoken and something that certainly needs to be said, just parts that I felt I should respond to.

Blue is for them, and red is for me.

"So when you were addressing this and saying "it's color theory" excuse why did you not show your earlier pieces of Raj as well? The ones with far darker hair and deeper skin tones? You only referenced all the ones after after the lightening had begun."

As mentioned before, I don't know when the lightening began. The pieces I grabbed for comparisons were the ones that I could actively get the flats for. A lot of my previous pieces have been deleted from my iPad after being moved to my laptop for storage reasons. While you can tell that Raj is darker in my oldest TDI posts, I wouldn't have been able to color grab the original skin color to compare it to the others, which is why I added ones that I could find the flats of directly off of my page. I do wish I had gotten the flats for the oldest ones, but I can't really do anything about that now.

"The beginning of your ask responses is blatantly false and you contradict yourself at the end? So why keep that whole schpiel at all?"

Here is the part that they are referring to: "I didn't? I think he just looks lighter because of the filters I used on top of it."

I left this in for transparency because I genuinely thought that that was actually the case. But it wasn't. This is why I added, "Looking into the color issue..." I wanted to double check the claim because it very well could have been an issue. And it was.

... "And not yet another piece that is still super light."

Okay. I think I might know what the problem is here in particular. I add texture overlays (the layers with the filter of 'Sl' - Soft Light) to give my pieces... y'know, texture. The layer color I use is usually an off-white. I do this in all of my pieces because I thought it might help with keeping my work safe from AI, and because I like the paper-like look that it gives my art. I didn't put it over the entire piece because the background already has a ton of texture.

The one above is at 50%, and the one below it is at 30% for both Raj and Bowie.

Here is the same piece with the texture overlays turned off:

(Left is w/o the overlays, Right is w/ the overlays)

I don't want this argument to seem like I'm lessening my actions. This is the only thing that I think I have the right to stand up for. Texture is something I most likely won't take out of my work, though I may replace the texture overlays with something that is more full proof against AI, like those AI-disturbance layers that Ibis Paint has.

None of my actions were excusable, but I felt this needed to be explained.

Other than that, though, I don't know what else I could possibly do to fix the piece, considering I have fixed Raj's skin tone in this piece.

○■○■○

The rest of the post is not something I feel the need to respond directly to. I do think you should go and read the original post criticizing me and decide what you want to do in this matter.

This was not a "silly mistake." What I have done is genuinely messed up. I'm not going to run from this situation and say that I was ever justified in my actions. Because I never was.

I can only hope to be given the chance to amend this situation with future works, whenever that might be. I will most likely not continue to talk about this unless asked to. Idk what else I could possibly say that wouldn't make this situation worse. I am the guilty party, and the only thing I can do is learn from this and do better in the future, which I will.

Again, I am so sorry. I have fucked up, and I am prepared to take the consquences of my actions.

[cherryredstars]

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x gn!reader (established relationship)

Warnings: short references to fighting/neglectful homelife, but mostly fluff

Summary: Taking a day off from work, Miguel sits with you as you both spend the day building legos. 

A/N: I had the undying urge to write this after continuously seeing posts about Miguel loving legos and Lego Peter. This is my first time posting anything on Tumblr so I apologize for any mistakes :))

Word Count: 1K (edited, but may still have some errors)

Miguel always loved legos as a kid. Legos were the perfect escape for him. It preoccupied his mind, forcing him to forget about his neglectful parents and disappointing home life. It was the one thing that could be just his, even when he let Gabriel help him when his parents were having screaming matches in the kitchen. Miguel would beam with pride after finishing a set, everything being perfectly in place and showing what time and dedication could result in. Even as an adult with multiple worlds weighing on his shoulders, Miguel still indulged in legos occasionally. He had an impressive collection on display in his personal office at home, but barely any free time to add to it. He suspected that it was one of the major reasons why he loved Lego Peter so much, though he would never admit it to another breathing soul. The smaller Spider-Man reminded him of simpler times. Times before the multiverse consumed his every hour and normalcy was still within reach for him. 

Today, however, the multiverse (with reluctance from Miguel) could wait. Or so you say. With your skills of persuasion, (you had called Jess and told her she would have to be in charge for the day as Miguel had “fallen ill”), you had successfully convinced Miguel to take the day off and spend it with you. He had complained at first, but later found himself relaxing as he sat besides you on the living room floor. You had decided that today would be dedicated to quality time between the both of you and that meant you would only do activities you could do together. That’s how Miguel found himself watching you become progressively more frustrated as you tried to build the lego set you had gotten him for his birthday. It never occurred to you that in Miguel’s advanced, futuristic dimension, that legos would also be more advanced and way more complex than what you were used to in your universe. 

"I think this is the right piece. This is the right one, right?" you question, your head looking from the instructional pamphlet to the small structure in front of you. 

Miguel watches in amusement as you count the pegs on the picture and compare it to the piece you snapped into place. You sigh as you realize that it, in fact, is not the right piece. Of course, Miguel already knew that the second you lifted up the lego piece. But who was he to ruin your concentration? He wouldn’t want to be “nagging” and “a backseat driver", as you so kindly described his previous attempts to help. You lift up the structure to eye-level, trying to gently remove the piece without breaking any of the work already made. You try to slide your nail in between the two pieces, but find that it stubbornly won't disconnect. Of course, even in the future some pieces still get stuck together with no way to remove them.

Your brows furrow at your failed attempts before giving Miguel an exasperated look, “You know, this is supposed to be a fun group activity. Not a ‘let me do nothing but sit around and watch as the love of my life struggles and does all the work’ activity.”

You hand the configuration of legos out to him and he simply raises a brow, "Who said I wasn’t having fun? On the contrary, I find your frustration entertaining." He reaches out and takes the structure from you, “It isn’t my fault you can’t follow simple instructions.”

You roll your eyes at him and hold up the instructions to his face, “How, in any universe, are these instructions classified as ‘simple’.” Even with your Spider intelligence, the symbols and pictures are complicated to follow. Trying to decipher them is an hour-long activity all in itself. 

Miguel shakes his head, “The box says for ages 12 and up. You’re in your 20s, yet you can’t understand pictures made for middle schoolers.” Carefully, he extends his claws and slides a single one between the pieces you tried to separate. He takes care to not scratch or damage the legos as his long talon easily disconnects the pieces with a pop. He smirks lazily, smug with the knowledge that he completed the task in seconds while you were struggling for the past two minutes.

He places the structure back into your hands and places the incorrect piece back into the pile on the table. He picks out the correct piece and slides it over to you. You can’t help the smile that spreads on your face as you roll your eyes again, “Yeah, well they made ‘Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?’ for a reason.”

Miguel sits back against the couch and smiles ever so slightly to himself as you continue building his lego set. Every now and then, you turn back to Miguel with a pout when you need his help separating legos or building a particular section. Of course, this leads to more snide and teasing remarks from him, but he can’t ever deny you anything and he can’t deny that your reliance on him does wonderful things for his ego. Eventually, you end up sliding over the whole set of instructions to him, prompting him to explain the next steps to you. The process goes by much quicker with Miguel telling you what pieces to use and where they go. The structure is done in less than 3 hours, halving the time it would take you if you had done it alone.

Later, Miguel sits in his office. He works on catching up on everything he had missed on his day off. It’s late into the night and the only source of light comes from the yellow screens that he studies. By now, you are already in a deep sleep down the hall in your shared bedroom. As he works, Miguel can’t keep his eyes from straying. Even in the dark, his enhanced eyes can clearly see the finished lego set placed front and center on his shelf. It is surrounded by framed photos of the both of you together and other miscellaneous trinkets you had given him throughout the course of your relationship. It is a shelf dedicated solely to his relationship with you. He scans the shelf once more with a small smile and Miguel thinks to himself that, just maybe, legos aren't the only thing that make him feel normal again. 

I am so sorry if any of the writing is shitty! It has been a good year since I wrote anything. I promise (hopefully) these will get better as I write more! But, I hope you enjoyed it :)).

[echoingbirdsofprey]

echoingbirdsofprey's Masterlist

Hi y'all! I'm finally, after a million years, getting around to making a masterlist. I may do one for each fic as well and I may post everything on tumblr again, but we'll see how this goes.

It's gonna take me a bit to complete so bear with me and I don't update on any special schedule, it's just whenever I finish something. I also do not do requests currently but it may be something I'd be open to in the future dependent on life and availability. I don't like to promise things and not deliver.

I am also going to include at the bottom, my original fiction, which is currently only posted on Wattpad and updated infrequently. If it gets some traction, I would put more time into it but just like my fanfiction, it is mostly for my enjoyment and I do share in case there's one other person out there looking for the exact same story as me.

Clicking on the name will bring you to the masterlist. In the case of the original fiction, it'll bring you to Wattpad.

EDITED TO ADD: ALL OF MY FICS ARE EXPLICIT/18+/MDNI!

Beginning the process of posting everything, I've realized there may be an easier way to post it all? So I am going to put most of the information on the masterlists (such as rating, pairing, and the overall word count of the story) and a couple of the fics have playlists. Some I will continue to link on each chapter, but some I will not, they will just be on the masterlist! I will still add warnings for each chapter so you know what to expect.

These are works of fiction and I own nothing but my original characters and original ideas, everything else is obviously not mine! Also none of my shit is beta read so there may be mistakes here and there so for that I apologize.

I do not consent to have my work reposted anywhere else without my consent. Please let me know if they are somewhere else!

Enjoy, comment, like and reblog! My ask box is always open!

Fanfiction

Twisters

Top Gun

The Mandalorian

Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Sleep Token

Original Fiction

In The Ribbons

Pneuma

[editclub]

Hello, hello! Welcome to Editclub!

This blog is dedicated to reblogging edits from editors that struggle with the unfair like-reblog ratio. View under the cut for more information!

This blog’s layout was created by selphim and the DNI this blog uses is found here. These links are also in my bio!

As I’m only one person and have a life outside of Tumblr, I can’t always see every single edit that deserves more reblogs. To combat this, anybody (not on the dni, of course) may tag this blog! This can be for edits that flopped, promos for new and old blogs, and even in brand new edit posts!

This blog will run on a queue that posts 2 times every day. This will definitely change in the future, but I’m keeping it at 2 for now as this blog is still rather new and I don’t want it to run stale. Thank you for understanding!

Admin posts will be kept to a minimum, and asks will keep anonymous turned off. This is to avoid taking the attention away from the blog’s goal and to fend off any would-be haters.

If at ANY point, I accidentally reblog from someone I probably shouldn’t’ve, you are more than welcome to let me know in my inbox! Please keep it polite, we don’t need any negativity here. The person mentioned in these asks will be blocked to avoid further mistakes, and their reblogs will be removed.

I am not against reblogging the same post more than once, so do not fret asking for more reblogs. Spam reblogging is off the table, however.

I may add more information to this post as time goes on, so please keep an eye out for any update posts. I don’t want anybody missing any important information!

TL;DR — feel free to tag this blog in anything, the blog runs on a queue, I won’t post much outside of reblogs, if I reblog from someone problematic let me know so I can take the proper action, keep an eye out for updates just in case I add more information later on, and I’m more than happy to reblog the same edit/promo multiple times.

[sankatsuka]

Haruka & Tsukasa Character Discussion - HFD: The Joy of Being Someone Else, Someone Who Makes Everyone Smile

I've been feeling like talking about Haruka and Tsukasa for the longest time... The intentions behind Project Sekai's writing still does confuse me, but I decided to take a personal approach as to what Haruka and Tsukasa mean to me.

Warning:

There will be HCs to fill in gaps

Spoilers up to BURN MY SOUL.

Mentions of ED

I am using my own experience with HFD to explain Haruka and Tsukasa's character

Messy. IT'S SO HARD TO TALK ABOUT PROSEKA CHARACTERS!!

Edit: Felt compelled to add more. I also just found out that it may be more appropriately called dysthymia?

The desire to become someone else is an ongoing theme in Project Sekai, an emotion insecure characters like Ichika and Akito have. I feel like it's very easy to see in both their characters - Ichika is definitely most obvious, Akito takes a little tiny bit of psycho-analysis but his commissions scream obvious. The two characters I feel these emotions are very prominent in as well, but aren't clearly shown are Haruka and Tsukasa, and I want to discuss this because of how interesting I find it to be.

Haruka's desire to become 'someone else' really only became crystal clear in That Day's Dream. The story made it very obvious with how she wished she could be like the Smiling Princess as a child. As for Tsukasa, that desire has ironically always been crystal clear in his claims to "Future Star". What these two share in common is that neither of them seem to be insecure. But... if you're able to tell Akito is insecure from how hard he pushes himself because he can't reach his goal - it's really the same with Haruka and Tsukasa, they are extremely hard on themselves when they can't deliver hope/become a star (Haruka's rehabilitation, Sky's Edge). It just isn't as obvious as Akito's because they are both capable of becoming that 'someone else': they don't have to push themselves to the brink of death like Akito to be stopped and realize an alternative: that you have your own light. (Haruka is slowly realizing it... not Tsukasa)

Haruka and Tsukasa's feelings to "become someone else" seem to come from a similar place: not being able to make their loved ones happy as children. Haruka as a child laments making her mother sad, whereas Tsukasa has once said in passing in Hinamatsuri that he always makes Saki sad. It's completely normal to let people down from time to time, but both Haruka and Tsukasa express a desire of wanting to make sure this never happens again (Haruka as a child working on her smile, Tsukasa trying to buy Hina dolls). We see this sense of responsibility in their present again and again: Haruka being extremely hard on herself for accidentally hurting Mai, Tsukasa continuously criticizing himself for his mistake in unit story. It's like it's unacceptable for them to make mistakes, even when it's not entirely their fault nor responsibility (Mai should have stopped herself, Nene and Rui were the ones who made the mistake in the first place and anyone serious about it would have gotten angry). This sense of responsibility is what's hurting them, but the question is: where did it come from? Why is it so strong?

We don't know, so it's theory zone here. Haruka's monotonousness as a child and her few facial expressions at present (when off-stage) to me seems like a general difficulty to feel positive emotions strongly. I like to think this is genetic, linked to high-functioning depression (HFD) and/or anxiety. Further evidence of this is in how Haruka randomly expresses discomfort being in crowds as a child, and how her parents have to check if she's fine with walking more - we see a bunch of negative emotions amplified with child Haruka, even in the present-day where she's the one who constantly worries for MMJ. Haruka is more capable of expressions when on stage as an idol, and to me that's because she's acting as someone cute who makes everyone smile. Perceiving something as 'cute' fills us with a pure sense of happiness. As someone who suffers from HFD, I feel happiest when I can make other people happy, with the things I love. I know I enjoy them, but I cannot feel it strongly. But when I create something out of the things I enjoy, and someone else enjoys it - it elates me beyond anything. As if your dull emotions reached someone who feels it strongly in your stead... It gives you a reason to work hard and live your life to the fullest and nothing else can make you that happy to look forward to the next day. I'm inclined to believe this is what makes Haruka feel so strongly responsible for others, she lives for them and wants to deliver only the best hope for them.

But having HFD also means you've suppressed the pain that comes with dulled emotions, that it becomes the norm to suppress other pains too to keep meeting expectations of the people you live for. It's where I think her ED stems from, and why she herself isn't fully aware of all the pain that comes with her perfect lifestyle in Break Time - because she's suppressed it all.

As for Tsukasa, it's more ambiguous. There are tons of theories with how little we still know about him - but this is one way to look at it at an angle of HFD. Most kids in his position wouldn't be as empathetic with being neglected for their sickly sibling, and children don't have empathy at a young age - we see how Rui couldn't understand why his classmates were afraid and how An gets angry when she doesn't get attention. Tsukasa demonstrates emotonal maturity at a young age, being able to just accept the situation without throwing a tantrum about why it has to be that way (so far). On top of that, he also has the emotional clarity to see that Saki is lonely and that she has to continuously force her smile. It again stems from emotional maturity - always putting himself in the other's shoes: in Hinamatsuri, instead of fixating on how hurt he was from the fall, he thinks more about how Saki must be sad about having to see the dolls she longed for all dirtied up like that.

But just how is he able to be this... easily selfless, without harbouring any spite for having to neglect his own desires? Once again, my HC is that this has to do with being born with HFD, that spending time with his family doesn't spark that much joy for him to get strongly upset over. But what he does express is a desire not to be left alone for too long, a primitive human emotion, but only to himself. But even with this loneliness, he prioritizes the emotions of his family. Because they're all having a hard time, what he can do is make them happy. Shows gave him his answer: becoming a star like Amami would let him give the best smile to his family and friends. He naturally wants to entertain them as much as that show excited them so they didn't have to keep suffering, and stardom was the answer to that.

For Tsukasa, this is the reason why he must be at Amami's level no matter what. He views this as the only way for him to deliver the best possible smile, to fulfil his life's purpose. As I said, with HFD you live for people - your life's purpose is to make other people happy with what you enjoy. Tsukasa didn't think much about the performance in the prologue, but he does note how just singing and dancing made everyone smile, which could be a hint to what about shows he enjoys (like how Haruka finds idols cute). But I think he's also been heavily misled to think being the top star is the only way - because, why not just be a star in your own right, as Tsukasa Tenma and not having anything to do with Seiichi Amami?

A notable difference about Haruka and Tsukasa's discoveries of their dreams is how they were introduced to it. Haruka was invited on stage as her own idol, Tsukasa was an audience. Haruka can be her own idol, whereas Tsukasa lacks this reference point of himself. And another difference is how their families treat their dreams - Tsukasa's family seem to view it as just an odd trait of his, whereas Haruka's parents took it very seriously when she expressed her desire to become an idol. In fact, Haruka's mother's words were probably most important in making sure Haruka remembered that she would always, always, always be enough as herself:

"Yeah. Because Haruka's smile... is the cutest in the world!"

It's Haruka's smile that's the cutest in the world to her beloved mother, and not just on stage. Wherever it was that Haruka was smiling, wherever it was that she found her happiness, it'd be the cutest for her mother. Her mother wants her to smile, to be happy, to remember idolhood is for her own happiness above all. Whereas for Tsukasa, his family was smiling at the star in front of them, not him. His own performance won't make anyone happy.

It doesn't change that Haruka is hard on herself though. Habits of taking on too much responsibility for the only thing you care about don't die easily, and the idol world is tough... But she has people who care about her, who were there for her when she was at her worst, and now she has MMJ. There's also the difference of how Haruka wants to be seen as a normal schoolgirl, whereas Tsukasa is always in future star mode and has never expressed a desire to be normal. Haruka can probably cling onto her normal self after quitting idolhood and not feel overly responsible about letting people down, because she knows it's just right that her real, non-idol self should be loved too. But for Tsukasa, this common sense doesn't exist, not when he isn't convinced that him just being there, being normal is enough to make Saki happy (Hinamatsuri):

Saki: "W-Wait, onii-chan! It's fine to be more normal about it! Icchan and the others will get surprised!

Tsukasa: "I-Is that so?"

Saki: "It is! Besides, it's enough fun with you just being here with me!"

Tsukasa: "Just being with me makes you have fun... That is indeed something only a star can do!"

Saki: "Ahahaha..."

This common sense doesn't exist because his upbringing has taught him that only through stardom will he be accepted and loved normally. Because he couldn't give anyone a smile when he was just himself, but they all smiled at the star - this is who he has to be in order for people to love him and so he can bring happiness to them. Unlike Haruka's parents who made it a point to show her how her own happiness is what makes them happy. And no one thinks there's anything wrong with Tsukasa's pursuits because he seems to be having fun, but he can only really have fun because of the false sense of security and belonging that the title of 'future star' creates for him. That we see the excruciating pain he goes through when suddenly, that dream of becoming a star seems to be impossible.

Because his parents never seemed to take his dream seriously like Haruka's (which is possibly the reason she was able to become an idol so early), Tsukasa has to work on the stardom he desperately wants on his own with no guidance since childhood. There's no reference point other than the star on the TV, no teacher to help him shape his very own acting style, so he has to imitate all of the star's mannerisms to get closer to them. It's similar to Minori, but because she was pursuing idolhood out of her own passion for it there wasn't as much pressure to get there quickly and do it right. But for Tsukasa, being a proper star is the only place he thinks he'll be happy in - a place he can finally make people smile and for the happiness he brings them to colour his dull world and save him, like how Haruka was saved with idolhood (HFD tingz). Unfortunately, that proper path was closed off from the beginning for him, because of the lack of parenting.

Minori once viewed idolhood as being just like Haruka, until her first live made her realize how idolhood was about working hard and shining as yourself over naively yearning to be someone you admire. Haruka always knew this because of how she was introduced to idolhood in way of 'you can be an idol, too!'. Tsukasa only seems to be realizing that now: his obsession with colouring his dull world with stardom made him not see how he as a person, his own emotions, has a role in achieving it as well. He can't just be a copy of others. As we can see from how he currently has a hard time grasping deeply emotional roles, it isn't far-off to deduce that his continuous emotional suppression, learning-from-imitation and lack of focus on self have hampered his ability to feel emotions purely as himself, and instead understands emotions from other people's perspectives - reflected in his empathy as a child.

Sky's Edge portrays Tsukasa's soul-crushing pain of being far away from the star of that day, of the impossibility of being that star, exactly because of how obsessed he is with stardom saving his dull, worthless days. The world became grey and colourless for Haruka when she suddenly became incapable of standing on the stage as an idol. But for Haruka... there was still a tiny bit of hope she can return to the stage by a miracle, because her own guilt was what was stopping her and her past proved that she always had the ability to. So more than permanent loss, it was frustration at being the way she was, how her own emotional weakness made the world became grey and made her unable to be an idol, when it was just... right... there. But MMJ showed her that it was fine to be that way, that she can still be an idol even as someone like that. Everyone has emotions, so she doesn't have to be hard on herself for it - share that pain with them, and then try again tomorrow.

Haruka's feelings in Painful Hope can be seen as a similar pain as the powerlessness and self-hatred that Tsukasa felt in Sky's Edge, but the difference is that Tsukasa doesn't have the hope she has. He never got a place on the stage as his ideal star before and now it's being shown to him how he will never get it because he may have reached his limit. Even though he tried so hard, getting past all the times he felt weak and wanted to give up - because something about him just wasn't enough (his emotions). It's as if it was all pointless. There's no proof to Tsukasa that his efforts were never pointless, like how Haruka's past successes prove to her. And this is all because Tsukasa never had the proper path to stardom in the first place, because his parents for some reason just didn't push him onto it despite how passionate he was.

But Tsukasa still reaches out, because he wants it and wants to be saved. Even the tiniest bit of hope that's there for his dream, he'll reach out for it. Just like Haruka did after she experienced her trauma on stage, until... it all felt impossible. Tsukasa seemed about ready to give up too at the end of Sky's Edge and just gave it his all, not expecting his performance to be any great but still wanting to try his best. Luckily for Tsukasa it worked, but for Haruka... it never did, until she met MMJ. But it may be better if things don't work out for Tsukasa at some point, like it was with Haruka - because it led her to meeting MMJ who taught her a happiness of not holding all her pain to herself anymore. Tsukasa and Haruka are humans, so getting too caught up pursuing an ideal without considering your own emotions is like rejecting your humanity, placing inhuman expectations on yourself. As If's lyrics goes, "A never-ending story? That's boring. I want to see a dawn that won't come 'forever'."

But... It may get very messy if stardom doesn't work out with Tsukasa, especially with his upbringing of 'not feeling loved as just himself'. Without stardom, Tsukasa will have nowhere to go. It will probably be a necessary mess at some point in the future so he can finally learn to embrace his humanity...

Maybe I'm biased, but with how Mafuyu and Touya have highly similar upbringings, maybe it's the same for the other SEKAI creator (Tsukasa) and Haruka. The difference does seem to be that the non-SEKAI creators were still loved. Even Touya by his own family, despite being wronged by them - he could tell his father was passionate, to the point he loved his father's music and he's still able to voice his complaints, but with Mafuyu it's just cold iciness. As if Touya can feel that his family will always care no matter how he expresses himself, whereas Mafuyu can feel that if she isn't the person her mother wants her to be, then she will lose the love her mother has for her (emotional manipulation...). And with Haruka and Tsukasa, this whole post details it - how Haruka's family's proper support is what has gotten her this far whereas Tsukasa's lack of it is what has led him astray.

If Mafuyu and Touya share 'winter' in their name, then Haruka and Tsukasa's relationship is in Tsukasa's use of the word 'haruka' in describing how far his dreams are 🤪

[the-muppet-joker-archive]

—INACTIVE as of July 16, 2024—

—Intro Post!—

Hello, you can call me MJ Archivist, or MJA (they/it/any neopronouns). (My pronouns.page) (My main: @evanthetrashpanda)

This blog is dedicated as an archive of all posts/reblogs that @the-muppet-joker (also called “MJ” or “KJ” on occasion) has made on tumblr & tiktok to date.

@the-muppet-joker's currently pinned post

@the-muppet-joker's previously pinned post

The date and time stamps (all timestamps will be in Pacific Time — US & Canada), a screenshot of what was under the keep reading (if there was one), and a screenshot of tags that the-muppet-joker used (if there were any) will be included on all posts.

While I am posting as much/often as I can, it may take some time for me to catch up to posting the current content because there's a lot.

I would say I'm happy to be here, but I'll have to bleach my eyes because of all of this.

For a current list of my archive tagging system, I have it posted here:

If you would like to check out fellow archive/curator blogs of the-muppet-joker, and/or all other current players in the Muppetverse, I have them posted here:

Disclaimers:

I am currently only up to May 16, 2024 - 8:58am / 08:58 (Pacific Time — US & Canada) when it comes to archiving posts. As this account is currently inactive, I do not plan on archiving more for the foreseeable future.

Most screenshots currently do not have any ALT text added. I'm adding it to previous posts as fast as I can.

I may on occasion accidentally miss posts, keep readings, @the-muppet-joker tags, or forget to add my own tags. If I do so, please let me know so that I can fix my mistake. (Send the post my way via message, or ping me in the comments of the post so I know exactly which post you are talking about please!)

There is a period of time where @the-muppet-joker was making and then immediately deleting posts, I unfortunately do not have these posts archived, but @themuppetarchives does have some of these posts archived. (Check here for those posts)

My main blog is @evanthetrashpanda. Please do not get it involved in any of this.

I neither want/plan to be part of the story, all I plan to do is preserve what currently exists for others to see in the future.

This blog is not in competition with, has no affiliation with, nor has any problems with other @the-muppet-joker archive blogs. We are all simply archiving posts that @the-muppet-joker has made.

I, the person who runs this blog, have absolutely no direct connection to @the-muppet-joker.

Last Edited: August 28, 2024 — 4:50pm / 16:50 (Pacific Time — US & Canada) Reason: Adding my main blog

[anotheroceanid]

Hello dear author,

I found you story and I must say that I am enchanted, especially after the last chapter! I'm glad to have checked your tumblr, as I enjoy as well arts, maps and memes. Your worldbuilding is impressive, and I am excited to discover more.

I LOVE the triplet. They are some of the best Perpollo kids I've read so far, if not the best. I can't wait to see them more possessive and protective of her mom. Luke was incredible in the last chapter, though I must admit that Milo is my fav so far. I hope they'll be protective of each other too in the future, especially since the relation between Hector and Luke seems kind of difficult at times. I'm curious how Gaea will manipulate Percy, now that Milo and Hector may be with the gods!

I do have one question, do you write regularly and have a sort of planning for the updates, or do you write when you feel like it, and post the new chapters whenever they're ready?

Thanks for sharing this wonderful work of yours! <3

Helloo, thank you very much for reading. Makes me so happy that you enjoy the story. 💕💕💕

I know that I created them, but I LOVE my triplets. Like, very much. And my fav is Milo too (tho I cannot be biased lol). Don’t worry, they’re all very protective or their mom, and despite everything, of each other too. We’ll see that in the chapters to come.

Gaea already commuting some mistakes, but unfortunately her manipulation will last a little longer. Though it’s soon starting to fail, for Percy is no longer absolutely isolated and at her mercy.

I try to post at least two chapters for month, and I always post in the weekends. This weekend I think I won’t post anything because I haven’t finished chapter 5 and it’s getting very long. I outline the chapters and I hand write the chapters to lately transcribe them, but when I start editing it add details and write a little more… well, sometimes it gets very long.

Also, I am in college, so sometimes it gets in the way of the chapters.

Thank you for reading and commenting 💕

[squarebracket-trickster]

Joy List

Another tag from August what the heck?? Thank you and SORRY to @thesoftestofpetals!!

Rules: Make a list of all of the things that have made you happy recently! Then, tag as many people as you want that you think may need it to keep the positivity going ✨

I'm just going to talk about writing things (WIPVII related) because otherwise I could go on for a while haha

I'm halfway done draft 3!!! 40 000 words!!!!

It's so funny!

I'm actually loving the descriptions I've included so far.

I have finally figured out why my characters were feeling flat and what I need to do in draft 4 to fix it!

I love the first line!

There's this 98 yo who volunteers where I work, she has owned horses all her life and I got to solicit her help in researching for this WIP. She is so fun to talk to oh my gosh.

I'm finally at the point in the editing process where I have fixed enough of the issues that I knew needed to be fixed from the beginning that I am now able to spot things I never thought about (for example: my chapters are weird lengths and break in weird places. The story is coming together well enough that I can spot that now!)

I do love the themes. Even if I am worried I won't do them justice.

This is such a nicely structured story. There are so many call-backs, character foils, and moments that mirror each other and it makes for great emotional impact.

Went back and reread the first scene yesterday. It's has a lot more potential that I was giving to credit for when I wrote it. And I can see what it needs to improve it, finally!

The scene I am working on right now is one of my favourites!

Henry is hot. Help.

This is the first project I have ever seriously edited - I am normally a hand in the first draft kind of person but you can't exactly do that with a full length novel. It's been amazing to see the project change and improve over time, especially in ways I could not have imagined when I was doing the first draft. It gives me more confidence in future first drafts - that later drafts aren't just fixing the obvious mistakes in the first draft, they will add new things too.

I feel like I am finally starting to develop my personal style.

Tagging oh so softly these lovely people I have not tagged yet: @aziz-reads, @steh-lar-uh-nuhs, @aalinaaaaaa, @scribe-of-stories, @nacricissa, @acmartin, @unstablewifiaccess, @marziethepan, @anonymousfoz, @serenanymph

[shadow-ren]

Obey Me: Nightbringer

SPOILERS FOR OBEY ME: NIGHTBRINGER LESSONS 11 - 12 ( Normal and Hard Modes), and Devilgram Stories

It is nearly 2 am, so the best time to brainstorm.

Who is Nightbringer?

Spoilers and Theory under cut

---

Let's just throw this out there for one - Nightbringer is a demon. They even say it when you question what their intentions are.

It is more than likely not Michael and has nothing to do with him as well just from Nightbringer being a demon. At this point in time, demons and angels are not on the best of terms since an all-out war could break out at any moment. It's a reason why Diavolo wanted to send MC back to the human world. It is dangerous enough that the Devildom took in the brothers that fell and if word got out what Diavolo did for Lilith, then it is on sight for sure. There is no going back. There are also points from the OG! Game.

But I digress, Nightbringer is hinted at more of being Barbatos than anyone else. From the opening scenes, Barbatos' time and space-bending abilities and other variables come into play that make the most sense. Barbatos is a horrifyingly powerful demon. That fact seems to go over a lot of players' heads since it is a game. The fact remains, he can bend space and time to his fucking will. He can go back and forth in time as much as he wants and he admits to doing.

This is from the Devilgram - Tea Time With You, a UR+ card that you have to obtain the pieces for in the lessons. This card dropped a bombshell and gave us foreshadowing. Barbatos plays butler for atonement.

This lets us glimpse into more of his personality. He did not care for others completely contradicting to what we saw from Day One. His exact words are "I never thought to think twice about the feelings of others I met along the way. I had zero interest in any of the beings I met along the way, nor in how my actions may or may not affect them." So why does he feel the need to atone? What did he do?

Well, when you ask him what he did -

He knows. He absolutely knows who you are. He is just keeping his mouth shut as usual and letting the MC do their usual crackhead energy bullshit.

There are several things we know about Nightbringer -

1. They are a demon.

2. They have foresight.

3. They have been around for a long time.

4. They have connections to the Demon King lineage and Solomon

5. They appear kind.

There are probably more that I am missing and others are more than welcome to point them out, but these are the ones I can think of and they all point to one demon specifically.

Barbatos.

He is older than dirt, has connections to the demon king lineage and Solomon, can see past and future, is a fucking demon, and is very good at keeping up appearances.

Edit: Also wanted to add that it is also that mistake that might have led to Barbatos making a pact with Solomon since I still don't understand why he would want or need to make a pact with Solomon.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

[waitmyturtles]

Turtles Catches Up With Old GMMTV: My Bromance and Yaoi Influences Edition

[What’s going on here? After joining Tumblr and discovering Thai BLs through KinnPorsche in 2022, I began watching GMMTV’s new offerings -- and realized that I had a lot of history to catch up on, to appreciate the more recent works that I was delving into. From tropes to BL frameworks, what we’re watching now hails from somewhere, and I’m learning about Thai BL's history through what I’m calling the Old GMMTV Challenge (OGMMTVC). Starting with recommendations from @absolutebl on their post regarding how GMMTV is correcting for its mistakes with its shows today, I’ve made an expansive list to get me through a condensed history of essential/classic/significant Thai BLs produced by GMMTV and many other BL studios. My watchlist, pasted below, lists what I’ve watched and what’s upcoming, along with the reviews I’ve written so far. Today, I cover My Bromance, a 2014 stepbrothers movie rooted in yaoi tropes and structures.]

Okie-dokie, my yaoi smokies! Earlier this week, I reviewed likely the most seminal film to have influenced the Thai television BL genre, 2007's Love of Siam. I took on one more pre-BL movie to round out the early Old GMMTV Challenge list in My Bromance (2014), and I did so for a few reasons.

First, a little time period context: before the launch of proto-Thai television BL in Love Sick (2014) -- an ensemble drama that did not center, but rather included, a queer romance in Phun x Noh -- Thai cinema was where queer relationships were mostly explored. In discussion with @bengiyo, Thai, pan-Asian, and international queer cinema was also where the majority of stereotypes about the presumed endings of queer relationships were mostly held, as I discussed at length in my Love of Siam review.

My Bromance aired in February 2014, and Love Sick aired in July 2014. I don't *think* the two properties spoke to each other by way of art or influence -- in part, simply because My Bromance is rooted in some STRONG Thai yaoi tropes that almost pre-determined the ending of the film (spoiler alert, I'll get into this later). (And I want to note and appreciate the differences in the term "yaoi" as interpreted in Japan vs. Thailand.) Love Sick, while utterly and fabulously chaotic, ended in happiness, with Phun and Noh confirming their relationship.

The second reason why I added My Bromance to this list is because history tells us that Thailand's past and present fascination with Japanese yaoi manga and anime, in part, primed wider Thai audiences for television dramas featuring queer love and relationships. As we know now, Thai filmmakers have made Thai television BL a genre of its own, complete with tropes and built-in assumptions about how the dramas are structured and how the stories are told. The most overt Thai yaoi-influenced drama on the OGMMTVC list is TharnType, and I wanted to add at least one pre-BL yaoi piece to get a sense for how yaoi would then play out on television (and I know there are PLENTY more very early television BLs that were touched by yaoi, but TharnType is the most influential one on the future of the BL genre).

The third reason for this addition is that the two leads of My Bromance -- Fluke Teerapat and Fluke Natouch -- both have long and notable careers in Thai television BL, with Fluke Natouch also having starred in a number of other pre-BL queer Thai films. Fluke Natouch, for me, reached legend-ish status by just existing in Until We Meet Again, which became a fast favorite of mine when I watched it for the OGMMTVC. But separately, I was particularly curious about seeing Fluke Teerapat in a pre-television Thai BL piece. As many of us know, likely his most famous role is that of Wad in SOTUS, GMMTV's first BL from 2016, in which Wad may or may not have been presumed to be paired with the older character, Prem. More importantly, since then, Fluke Teerapat has had a long career in Thai BL screenwriting, penning (with his partner, Tanachot Prapasri) two of the most notable non-GMMTV BLs of the past few years, My Ride and La Pluie. Both of these shows have reached a touch of cult status, and if they were both penned by a guy who's been around the BL way for a second, then -- I wondered if Fluke Teerapat's early acting career could give me insight in any lessons he learned about, maybe, what NOT to do in Thai BLs today.

Welp, I think My Bromance helps with those lessons, lol. @lurkingshan hipped me to the central trope that structures My Bromance -- the yaoi stepbrother trope in which, yes, oh yes, stepbrothers, ya know.

Maybe the first and most overall general assessment I can give of My Bromance is that it could perhaps get a little insane in its storyline by way of how it needed to be centralized around the taboo yaoi stepbrother trope in the first place. I've talked with @so-much-yet-to-learn and @absolutebl in the past about how in some shows rooted in yaoi, or at least a taboo trope or two -- how oftentimes, that show may include two or three or more taboo influences, since the show already decided to go to a different place than a socially acceptable moral or ethical center-norm.

I think I was watching that in My Bromance. Besides the stepbrothers realizing that they were attracted to each other, probably the most remarkable infrastructural inclusion of this movie was the utter cluelessness by Golf, the stepbrother played by Fluke Teerapat, that trying to continue a relationship in the face of everything against them might have been an effort not worth pursuing. That love of this sort might lead to more pain than pleasure.

Golf was a character set up as essentially abandoned by his father and stepmother for the sake of work, as both parents left Golf alone to travel for work constantly -- which left Golf alone in a house with Bank (Fluke Natouch) for lengthy periods of time that allowed them to find out their love for each other. Now, if you and your lover are alone for an inordinate amount of time, then yes -- you are going to think that in that environment, in that particular moment, your love can flourish. But when reality hit, and Golf and Bank were found out, and attempts were made to split them up, man, did Golf ever put the pressure on Bank to just... suck it up.

It was a tough framework to watch. Golf, through Fluke Teerapat's acting, was the living version of denial personified. He would NOT accept, immaturely, that Bank and himself could NOT be together. EVEN WHILE Golf and Bank were ultimately separated, physically and emotionally, Golf expected Bank's love to remain true. (I mean, imagine, this Bank is played by an 18-year-old Fluke Natouch. Bank was taking hit after hit!) And this is even after Golf returns from a years-long overseas stint.... with a girlfriend. Golf still scolds Bank for giving up on their love...

...to the point that they get into a physical altercation with deeply impactful results involving a car accident, surgeries, organ transplants, everything. Apologies for spoiling the ending, but it was so wild for me that I just need to process it for a second and consider its impact on television BLs.

I mentioned before that Bank was taking hit after hit. Before the car accident, his own mother seemed to begin to accept his sexual orientation (!!!) -- even trying to set Bank up with a new boyfriend. Thundering right back to another yaoi framework, Bank replies that while he might be gay, he doesn't need to love another man (what was this movie DOING to poor Bank?!). Then, later on, Bank even reluctantly agrees to try seeing a new guy himself at school. Bank himself wasn't necessarily an innocent blushing maiden -- at one point, he called Golf a coward for not being 100% committed to their love, which I think was an accurate call-out for what Golf was expecting Bank to accept by way of Golf's outward performance as a straight man. The poor kid was just trying to figure himself the hell out in the face of confusion and repeated abandonment.

Then the car accident happens, and Bank is gravely injured, to which Golf responds with a kidney (at least Golf showed up in one way!). And Golf disappears after that.

We learn, after Bank leaves the hospital, that Golf has died. (Here's where we get into the we've-come-to-expect-horrible-endings-for-queer-characters paradigm that I discussed in my Love of Siam review.) Man, Bank was taking a lot. He was under the impression at one point that Golf was going to get engaged. And then he learns that Golf, instead, was gone!

It was a lot -- a lot for a movie that clearly was not going to treat its queer characters well, inconsistently at best, and a lot for a movie that kept piling on the yaoi-ness of the genre it was playing in. These guys stood no chance of happiness, especially with Golf insisting that Bank still love him, despite everything Golf himself was doing in trying to live a straight life with a girlfriend/fiancée before he departs the film.

Now, with the benefit of watching this 2014 film with 2023 hindsight, I knew that Golf would "come back" in a My Bromance television series from 2020. But in 2014, at the end of the first movie -- I am sure audiences were just like, what.... was all that for. Bank had been through the ringer, for a relationship that was going to be difficult to maintain anyway, in a society that isn't easy on gay men in the first place in mid-2010s Thailand. (And the WONDERFUL @twig-tea filled me in on the context of the long wait to get to 2020's My Bromance sequel in the first place -- only for fans to be disappointed again in the quality of that series.)

When I think about this film in the context of 2019's TharnType, and even to a smaller extent, 2018's Love By Chance (both MAME pieces that feature yaoi overtones), it just seems that a common framework of early Thai yaoi BLs was that many of the dudes just didn't deserve empathy in their creation and longevity. That being queer AUTOMATICALLY meant that one was subject to pain. It's interesting for me to ponder this as this expectation was flirted with on television screens, as opposed to the movies. Again, while I discussed this previously in the context of how cinematically-driven queer and/or BL art plays out -- in regards to art that's structured specifically around yaoi frameworks, it seems like a rule that the dudes are supposed to take hit after hit, without the responsibility of the content checking in on the characters and offering them alternate trajectories of emotional discovery.

We didn't see that in TharnType -- TharnType featured a deeply complicated resolution that involved the intentional hurting of feelings over lengthy periods of time, and a redemption for an INCREDIBLY problematic character in Lhong. And TharnType was made not that long ago -- just four years ago from now.

I talked at length in my Love of Siam review about how brilliantly today's BL filmmakers have taken other expectations of Asian media, such as the concept of open-ended endings, to fascinating and artistically challenging results (to me, resulting in beautiful pieces). But when a piece is structured around yaoi rules and tropes, then it seems like many characters don't stand a chance at happiness. I know that's not a hard and fast rule, but it does create an expectation that something might happen.

I haven't seen My Ride and La Pluie yet, but at least with my dear drama clown friends, I followed the La Pluie journey through meta, and it looks about as opposite from My Bromance as anything -- a tight story about an emotional journey that featured a little magical realism and a lot of emotional development. I want to think that Fluke Teerapat saw the early work that he himself was getting involved in, and said to himself -- man, I know how I can make this MUCH, MUCH better, especially to represent queer happiness and queer love. I think he was beginning to address these conflicts in 2020's YYY, which features a wildly fabulous character in Porpla DEMANDING that the men of their life perform exactly to their yaoi standards. By the time Fluke Teerapat gets to My Ride and La Pluie -- it makes me think he had learned ENOUGH about what could go bad to make excellent standalone art.

Because of my respective fascination and appreciation for both Flukes, I'm glad I watched My Bromance, and separately, it does very much deserve a spot on the OGMMTVC syllabus to just show us what was out there on the eve of Love Sick's premiere. We hear so often that yaoi was an important influence to early Thai canon novel BLs and the television genre, so this sets up folks nicely to understand why shows later on like TharnType existed and were so popular. The expectation had been born and bred, and with TharnType's heat included, it drove the masses crazy. For my totally personal tastes, My Bromance wasn't my speed. But I do think and hope that it set up the two EXCELLENT Flukes for developing their standards around good, even GREAT, BLs in their writing and acting futures.

[Allllllllllright! My previously unscheduled detour into early Thai queer cinema is done for the moment, and I am back to the chronology of a few weeks ago, when I left off with Manner of Death watched and unreviewed. That review will drop early next week. My LOVING homage to my first P'Aof Noppharnach BL in my rewatch review of A Tale of Thousand Stars will drop after that. And then, my surprised take on Lovely Writer -- surprised because I did not expect, at all, to fall so much in love with it!

I'm getting through Nadao Bangkok's Last Twilight in Phuket and I Promised You The Moon at the moment, and soon on the horizon, I've got Not Me and 55:15 Never Too Late on deck -- 55:15 on the list because of its integrated BL storyline and commentary. And then a moment that *I* know I've been waiting for -- my long-awaited Bad Buddy and Our Skyy 2 rewatch. Oh, my heart. Can't wait.

The latest list is below -- I welcome your thoughts! (Tumblr's new web editor is jacking with this list below and not letting me strikethrough those shows that I've watched. For the most updated list, check this link right here.)

1) The Love of Siam (2007) (movie) (review here) 2) My Bromance (2014) (movie) 3) Love Sick and Love Sick 2 (2014 and 2015) (review here) 4) Gay OK Bangkok Season 1 (2016) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 5) Make It Right (2016) (review here) 6) SOTUS (2016-2017) (review here) 7) Gay OK Bangkok Season 2 (2017) (a non-BL queer series directed by Jojo Tichakorn and written by Aof Noppharnach) (review here) 8) Make It Right 2 (2017) (review here) 9) Together With Me (2017) (review here) 10) SOTUS S/Our Skyy x SOTUS (2017-2018) (review here) 11) Love By Chance (2018) (review here) 12) Kiss Me Again: PeteKao cuts (2018) (no review) 13) He’s Coming To Me (2019) (review here) 14) Dark Blue Kiss (2019) and Our Skyy x Kiss Me Again (2018) (review here) 15) TharnType (2019-2020) (review here) 16) Senior Secret Love: Puppy Honey (OffGun BL cuts) (2016 and 2017) (no review) 17) Theory of Love (2019) (review here) 18) 3 Will Be Free (2019) (a non-BL and an important harbinger of things to come in 2019 and beyond re: Jojo Tichakorn pushing queer content in non-BLs) (review here) 19) Dew the Movie (2019) (review here) 20) Until We Meet Again (2019-2020) (review here) 21) 2gether (2020) and Still 2gether (2020) (review here) 22) I Told Sunset About You (2020) (review here) 23) YYY (2020, out of chronological order) (review here) 24) Manner of Death (2020-2021) (not a true BL, but a MaxTul queer/gay romance set within a genre-based show that likely influenced Not Me and KinnPorsche) (review coming) 25) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) (review here) 26) A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake Of Rewatching Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (review coming) 27) Lovely Writer (2021) (review coming) 28) Last Twilight in Phuket (2021) (the mini-special before IPYTM) 29) I Promised You the Moon (2021) 30) Not Me (2021-2022) 31) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) (thesis here) 32) 55:15 Never Too Late (2021-2022) (not a BL, but a GMMTV drama that features a macro BL storyline about shipper culture and the BL industry) 33) Bad Buddy (2021-2022) and Our Skyy 2 x BBS x ATOTS (2023) OGMMTVC Rewatch 34) Secret Crush On You (2022) [watching for Cheewin’s trajectory of studying queer joy from Make It Right (high school), to SCOY (college), to Bed Friend (working adults)] 35) KinnPorsche (2022) (tag here) 36) KinnPorsche (2022) OGMMTVC Fastest Rewatch Known To Humankind For The Sake of Re-Analyzing the KP Cultural Zeitgeist 37) The Eclipse (2022) (tag here) 38) GAP (2022-2023) (Thailand’s first GL) 39) My School President (2022-2023) and Our Skyy 2 x My School President (2023) 40) Moonlight Chicken (2023) (tag here) 41) Bed Friend (2023) (tag here) (Cheewin’s latest show, depicting a queer joy journey among working adults) 42) Be My Favorite (2023) (tag here) (I’m including this for BMF’s sophisticated commentary on Krist’s career past as a BL icon) 43) Only Friends (2023)]

[kirwond]

The Star in the Depths - A Genshin Impact Playlist

A playlist for Genshin Impact, following characters and events for Chapter 4: Masquerade of the Guilty.

Notes from the game. Cover art is a game screenshot.

Listen at Spotify.

Even more playlists here.

Tracklist and notes below the cut.

Le Souvenir avec le crepuscule - HOYO-MIX

Full Fathom Five - Meav

Every person in Fontaine is born with sin. No matter how the Nation of Justice holds trial after trial, this sin cannot be absolved. In the end, the people will all be dissolved into the waters, and only the Hydro Archon will remain, weeping on her throne. Only then will the sins of the people of Fontaine be washed away.

Happy Face - Jagwar Twin

Lyney: Sometimes, I think people would feel sorry for the real me. Do you? *sigh* Or do you find my little games absurd?

Poker Face - Lady Gaga

Lynette: During our shows, I'm usually Lyney's assistant. Because I never speak or change expressions, people often mistake me for a puppet. This kind of misunderstanding can prevent unnecessary social interactions, so it's actually quite nice.

I am not a woman, I'm a god - Halsey

Furina: I suppose it's only natural for you to be awestruck by my abilities. You had best stop and consider... do you really have the noble qualities and etiquette necessary to communicate with a god? All it takes is a flick of my finger for me to know everything about you.

Marelle - Cirque du Soleil

Paimon: Ooh, Paimon can hardly wait! Paimon's never seen a real live magic show before!

She's A Rainbow - The Rolling Stones

Navia: I always say that blind optimism isn't the answer — if you want a bright future, you have to go out and seize it with your own two hands! So, come over here... Now, take my hands in yours and give them a good shake. There! See, doesn't that feel good?

Comfortably Numb - Dar Williams

Freminet: If you look up at the sky from far enough underwater, even the sun is soft on the eyes. That's why I like it down there.

God's Gonna Cut You Down - Shelby Lynne

Clorinde: Have you ever seen a guilty person on trial? Violence is explained away as virtue and evil as good... Their lies must be demolished, and the court cleansed of their filth.

WUWAHAHAHA - PeachyFranny

Furina: Don't tell me that your investigation came up empty-handed? But don't let that stop you, Traveler. I shall be terribly disappointed should you, my most anticipated foe, concede so easily.

Ramalama (Bang Bang) - Roisin Murphy

Charlotte: To me, the world is a giant hoard of hidden treasure, with countless stories waiting to be uncovered. Every time I see something where I think a secret might be hiding, I snap a photo with my Kamera and add it to my collection.

Hell Is For Children - Sershen & Zaritskaya

Arlecchino: The House of the Hearth takes in war orphans from all over Teyvat, but as for how to raise them... That depends entirely on the person in charge.

Fragile - Sting

Neuvilette: Life flows like water, and rain is the final answer. The water levels may sometimes tilt one way or another, but the rain falls fairly upon all.

The Water Is Fine (Crimson Edition) - Chloe Ament

Oceanids: Vacher... Vacher... Vacher... Drown.

Bottom Of The Deep Blue Sea - MISSIO

Neuvilette: According to reports from the Fortress of Meropide, Childe recently disappeared under mysterious circumstances. Special guards oversee the Fortress, and its internal systems are extensive. Combined with the special characteristics of the surrounding terrain, an escape should not be possible. I suspect that there's something else behind his disappearance.

Fix You - Christina Perri

Sigewinne: In my infirmary, I don't see criminals who deserve to suffer — I see patients who deserve a sickbed. Because whoever you are, you have to get healthy so you can serve your sentence and pay for your crimes, right?

Breathe Me - Sia

Over the next few hours, Emilie sat by the woman's side in silence as the latter slowly told her stories of herself and the deceased. Emilie did not reply all that much. She merely held the woman's hand, patiently waiting as the tale stumbled forth, waiting until all the anxious thoughts and troubled words had been exhausted, until only quiet sorrow remained.

Blood Upon The Snow - Hozier/Bear McCreary

Wriothesley: My parents created a facade of joy and employed cruel methods to keep their grasp on power. So, in the end, I killed them, and set all of the remaining children free. I was convicted for my crimes, and exiled to the Fortress of Meropide. It's alright, you don't have to tell me what you think. The least I can do is to make sure that the same tragedy will not happen again in my new home.

Blood // Water - grandson

Arlecchino: The prophecy's hanging above our necks like a guillotine. Every faction is looking for a way to either avert the disaster, or save their own. But you? It beggars belief just how nonchalant and carefree you have been. From the very beginning, you, the god Focalors... You have utterly failed to take action. How are the people you've sworn to protect supposed to survive in a land that will soon disappear beneath the waves?

The Show Must Go On - Queen

Furina: No. I have nothing to say. I am Furina, the Archon of Fontaine! All you need to do, dear spectator, is to witness my performance until the curtains fall.

La vaguelette - HOYO-MIX/Cecilia Cara

Focalors: Farewell, Neuvillette. I hope you've enjoyed the part you played these five hundred years. Thank you, Furina, for all you've done. From this moment on, please live happily as a human, just as I wished we could.

Human (Acoustic) - Mozi

Furina: There was once a time when I was an actress in a masquerade, seeking only to hide the truth. But from now on, I want to spend my time learning real stories about real people, and how they touch the lives of others around them.

Paris - Caro Emerald

Chiori: Take it from me — this one looks good on you. Hmm? You've never seen a style like this before? That's because you've never met a designer with taste before.

Somebody's Watching Me - Rockwell

Chevreuse: The Special Security and Surveillance Patrol isn't involved in regular patrol duties around Fontaine. The people we're after aren't exactly the type who just pop up on the street.

Pink Moon - AURORA

Skirk: You should have the remains of the Third Descender on your person, yes? You should probably get rid of objects of misfortune, to prevent any disasters from befalling you. To live is in itself a blessing. But once a person dies, the bonds he once had with this world shall all turn to curses.

Fly Away - TheFatRat/Anjulie

Xianyun: Oh, what a soothing wind. Shall one attach some adepti sigils to your person, so that you may join me for a flight in the firmament?

Who I Am - The Score

Gaming: My dad keeps hoping I'll come 'round to the idea of him teaching me how to do business one day. He doesn't seem to realize that the whole reason I left my hometown in the first place is 'cause I've already figured out what's best for me.

Counting Stars - OneRepublic

Sethos: To be honest, being a leader is a little stressful, especially in the Temple of Silence. But after all the years I spent with Grandfather, I'm clear in my own mind about the areas where I cannot compromise. Don't worry — I won't mess it up.

Way Down We Go - KALEO

Dainsleif: There were five of them. The Five Sinners of Khaenri'ah. "The Wise" Hroptatyr, "The Visionary" Vedrfolnir, "Gold" Rhinedottir, "The Foul" Surtalogi, and "Rächer of Solnari" Rerir. No matter how eroded my memory may become, I will never forget their names. One day... I shall have my vengeance.

Bridge Over Troubled Water - Simon & Garfunkel

Caribert: My goal was simple — to use the Loom of Fate in its near-completed form, when its ability to create memories was at its strongest, to implant a specific memory into the minds of the Hilichurls. In that memory, I would tell them a story, just like my father did for me. It was a story of fairy tales and love... But, more than anything, it was the story of us.

The Sea - Morcheeba

Neuvilette: I suggest that you fully prepare yourself before going to Natlan. In the meantime, Fontaine's doors will always be open to you.

[new-king-kasa-official-archived]

oh god this is gonna be my longest post yet. here we go

blog runner- @dreamblues

other rp blogs of mine connected to this one: @guardian-angel-minori, @umbra-kasa-official

tags:

ic: tsukasa

ooc: mun

ship: (insert ship here)

please ask if you need any triggers tagged

notes:

mlm leaning aroace-spec

audhd

uses he/she (girlboy <3)

rp blog masterlist

ok ok. the lore is under here. godspeed this is long

last edited: 11/29/2023

This Tsukasa has switched places with another version of himself as a result of an incident in which his previous powers were stolen after being abducted. He is now set to become a king if he is to ever go to his new universe. Down below is lore for his previous identity.

This is a blog for an au version of Tsukasa who was killed in an incident involving a time anomaly and was later revived by another timekeeper (WXS Miku)

In his universe, he was responsible for preventing time anomalies before they can interfere with events in the timeline. His revival was meant to correct a mistake before it could have a severe impact on the flow of time.

Timekeepers are capable of detecting objects or living beings that are at risk of triggering a time anomaly if left unchecked, and thus they're required to take care of them in any way they see fit until the time anomaly is successfully averted. In Tsukasa's case, she usually resorts to either picking up objects and putting them into a huge living space she shares with Miku or simply luring living beings away from the events playing at hand.

Timekeepers are also able to time travel to any point in time

Tsukasa is unable to make his presence known to anyone in his universe because of the risks that could come with revealing the existence of timekeepers to the world. There was an incident where he did, in fact, have to reveal himself to the public in order to stop a serious time anomaly, causing him to be forced to wipe everyone’s memory of him to make sure no one spreads the truth. This incident has left him deeply traumatized.

Since Timekeeper Tsukasa is... a unique case, she got transported into what I'm going to call ✨the pjsk rp verse✨ through different means. It was a mere accident on her part in which she tried to travel to the future, but instead sent herself into a whole other universe separate from hers. Because she's not in the one she's supposed to be from, her powers grow unstable and she's unable to return home until her powers completely stabilize. She also loses the ability to detect time anomalies, though she can't figure out a reason why. Right now, she's just a god who can't use her powers whatsoever.

Because of his circumstances, he never got the chance to meet Emu, Nene, and Rui. That means the only ones he knows from the main cast would have to be Ichika, Saki, Honami, Shiho, Shizuku, Toya, and maybe Airi (in the sense that he only knows about her through what Saki's said about her. Pretty sure it's canon Saki was a huge fan of Happy Happy Everyday)

He may end up confused by the existence of sekai at first, as this au wasn't built with sekai existing in mind

Because Miku is a timekeeper (and possibly other vs) in this au, the concept of virtual singers may not be present in Tsukasa’s universe, as they would exist in different forms

Will add more lore if I have to

Update: on 11/28/2023, there has been a recent discovery that Tsukasa can get prophetic visions through his dreams. Whether this is his powers manifesting once more in a different form or something else is currently unknown to everyone around her.