#I know it was all for the sake of the cliffhanger but I'll never be over Lucas desperately wanting to marry someone and fantasizing about

[maya-matlin]

very UO but if they couldn’t bring back Jake, they should have stuck Peyton and Julian together as endgame over Leyton! Julian and Peyton had already supposedly been in love, they both like cities (LA, NYC etc) and it makes sense they’d live there due to their careers, and both Peyton and Julian for a lot of their time on the series seemed ambivalent about starting a family. Also, Julian is smart and on the introverted side like Lucas but a little goofy like Jake - a combination of the traits Payron goes for! Meanwhile, we saw so clearly in season 5 that Brooke and Lucas both loved being back in one tree hill, they both seem to have jobs they can do anywhere, they both very much prioritize settling down and having a family, they were already unofficially co-parenting Angie, they still have that seemingly effortless and magical connection, they balance each other out perfectly…I could go on!

Honestly, I wouldn't have minded that one bit. First of all, Peyton deserved a million times better than Lucas by the time he finally got around to choosing her. She was lacking any sort of spine or self respect when she ran to that airport. As irritating as I found her character for large stretches of season 5, ultimately she wasn't in the greatest place and only imagined that her happiness could be attainable if she won Lucas back. Now to get back to what you were saying. I definitely think Peyton was better off and would have thrived most living away from Tree Hill in a bigger city where her dreams could really take off. I mean, the show really said that because Peyton wasn't exactly where she wanted to be at age 22 that this made her a failure and retroactively meant her decision not to rush down the aisle at age 19 had been a terrible, awful, shameful mistake. Seasons 6 and 7 Julian would have made a lot of sense as a partner for the ambitious Peyton who had faced so much trauma and pain in her hometown. STRONGLY agreed about your points re: Peyton and Julian being ambivalent and sometimes even negative about settling down in Tree Hill compared to Brooke and Lucas who genuinely loved it there and couldn't imagine raising their families elsewhere. I'm aware every aspect of this was unintentional considering the possibility of a Brucas endgame post season 3 was basically taboo, but in terms of compatibility Brooke/Lucas and Peyton/Julian made the most sense. If we couldn't have Jake back for Peyton, obviously. In the end, Peyton still left Tree Hill, something Lucas never wanted. And Julian settled for staying in Tree Hill for Brooke even though he'd rather be in LA. Relationships are all about compromise, but it's interesting how their situations sort of parallel. You should go on, because I love reading your thoughts! I genuinely think if not for Peyton's continued interest in Lucas and Lucas having an unfortunate history of making the same mistakes over and over again, Lucas would have eventually ended up with Brooke. Season 5 Brucas had such an ease around each other. Their goals lined up perfectly. The chemistry was still there. Their communication was really solid and both went out of their way to emotionally support the other. Maybe it's because the pressure was off considering neither was expressing their feelings, but you see them taking care of Angie and the way Lucas considered proposing to Brooke and instinctively know that they could have had it all. It's really depressing.

[imsickofpasswords]

A theory of the Ineffable Plan.

By elsamirrre5322 on YouTube

Realistic_Street1312 on Reddit

ParkSeo-Jun on Fandom

Imsickofpasswords on Tumblr

(Yes, all me!)

Book of Genesis 1–11: And God said: 'Let us make man in our image"

From Neil Gaiman’s MAster Class: When you tell a story, it is crucial that you completely believe in what you're writing

Hi, Good Omens's fellow victims! Like so many, I have been trying to cope with Eternity (I mean the dreadful period between season 2 and, either season 3, or my personal Armageddon.) That rotting brain of mine came up with a theory regarding the message that Good Omens (book and show) is striving to convey. What is it that Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman believe in so hard, as human beings and writers, that they want the whole world to understand it? Well, what I found, whether or not it is accurate, is at least beautiful. So I wish to share it with you.

Before I begin and you accuse me of pedantry, know that my every sentence begins with an invisible imho.

***

Since there is no way around it, I'll talk about the ship and the cruel, heart-wrenching, forever traumatizing, law-should-forbid-that-kind-of-things, cliffhanger. No matter how hard I think, this ship is the most beautiful love story ever (yes, imho). Is it because it doesn't involve burning passion, emphatic confessions and great sacrifices? It's about beings who harbor the same inner values but underwent such different trials that their personalities ended up diametrically opposed. Their love (and loneliness) pulls them together and allows them to rub off on each other, but they still retain their identities and won't go against their principles for the sake of the relationship. In the fight, they both proposed to each other, I mean proposed, like, let’s get married. And neither of them got rejected. They both wanted to be together, and made that part perfectly clear. What they declined was the terms of the contract. Either Crowley going back to pretending he trusts Heaven’s institution, or Aziraphale abandoning his faith. They both expect to be loved for who they truly are and believe in. And of course, this is exactly what they will achieve… True love instead of the illusion of love. First prediction in my Silly and Hopeful Book Of Prophecies.

***

Having taken the mammoth out of the room, I’ll explain my theory.

Whilst reading the book, I realized that the original story was never that of Aziraphale and Crowley (worry not, I have plenty to say about them…). It was that of Adam (originally, William the Antichrist) and the Them. More than that, it’s a saga about humanity achieving its full potential.

***

God

Of course, we should begin with God, since God created humanity, the universe(s) and the rules by which everyone and everything must abide. So. Who is God? Well if I could answer that, I'd probably know how to make a whale. I don't know how to make a whale. But certainly there are things we know, or can guess about God.

First, she (I’m a woman and it makes me obscenely happy to write “she” here) is the narrator. Second, she does not play dice with the universe. The first fact means that God can see everything, down to an angel and a demon drinking solidly for two hours, or a nightingale singing in Berkeley square. Second statement means there is no such thing as chance or hazard in that universe of hers. Everything happens for a reason.

It sounds like God wrote everything, everyone's destiny, like Gaiman and Pratchett did for their characters. Crowley says so himself. Humanity, Aziraphale, Crowley, everybody, they are all characters in the book called The Great Plan.

I think God injected herself in her own story under the disguise of Agnes Nutter. Only God can always be right.

So, here we have Gaiman and Pratchett hiding behind God, and God hiding behind Agnes Nutter. The Bible turned into The Great Plan, and then into a book of prophecies.

But what kind of person is God? Is She compassionate, loving, merciful? Yes. I firmly believe that. Err… Wait. Same God that drowned almost everybody, goats included, and wanted to kill Job's children… and goats!

“When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why God? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off.”

― Stephen King, Storm of the Century.

Yes. Same God who never failed to prove herself a master torturer, a mass murderer and a serial killer in a single package. How do I reconcile both sides? Death… is only temporary! I mean, Jesus could bring Lazarus back, Adam resurrected a fuckton of people, and Crowley easily performed miracle escapes. Maybe death isn't the terrible thing we think it is… (except for Nazis? But Nazis aren’t really human, are they?) As for Job's children and goats, God knew that Crowley was around, up to no evil…

Having said that, I remember Stephen King writing something else. Whoever remembers that quote, let me know. Something like this: " If God created everything, then It must rule over both Good and Evil. If It only rules over Good, then there must be someone who rules over it all. I’ll worship that someone as the actual Almighty."

I agree. Good and Evil are like two faces of a coin. Death introduced Itself as the shadow of Creation and states “I’m neither of Hell, nor Heaven”. Evil must be the shadow of Good. And everything is a part of God.

***

The Adams

No, not the family, come on! What would they be doing here? Ah, attending the Second Coming. Come to think of it, it's indeed the kind of event they wouldn’t want to miss…

Anyway, their name is spelled Addams and I’m actually talking about the two Adams of the story. Old Adam, who ate the forbidden fruit in the garden of Eden, and young Adam (I mean Adam Young) who steals apples in the garden of his neighbor. As I see it, they are allegories of Humanity.

As Crowley said, most universes come pre-aged, while this one will be allowed to grow. In the same way, Humanity is a species that will be allowed to grow. What ever for? Entertain God? Eternity does sound boring. Certainly a God could use a good laugh once in a while… But Nah. What do people do when they're bored with their lives? Hint: not their best idea? They have children! (or pets. Pets is a good idea…)

At the beginning, Adam and Eve are all of Humanity. They can't tell good from evil as they haven't experienced anything yet. Despite looking like full grownups, they are still babies. Crowley designed, not a star factory, but a fancy wallpaper indeed, for… a nursery.

Now, how is Baby Humanity supposed to grow? Crowley! Good ol’ Crowley! His temptation is the first opportunity to exercise free will. It’s the first lesson and the reason why the apple isn't at the top of a mountain or on the Moon. Choose for yourself, and see what happens. By eating the forbidden fruit, Adam and Eve don't actually get any knowledge of right or wrong. The first sin marks the beginning of the teenage rebellion that is necessary to grow beyond what was taught. Everything that comes after is like an initiation rite. A six-thousand year long initiation rite with angels and demons along the way as teachers and… the end of the world as a final test.

At the end of season one, Adam Young is back to being human. He represents Humanity at a later stage. An almost fully grown humanity that has learnt a lot (too much?) about free will. Once again, it takes Crowley’s intervention (just slightly motivated by the idea of Aziraphale’s threat never to talk to him again…) to push Adam towards the right path. Note that I didn’t write the good path. I meant the right path, the one that wasn't created for him even before he was born, I mean the path he made for himself.

The main difference between Old Adam and Adam Young deserves to be stressed here. Adam Young’s education was provided by other humans, his parents, his friends, Anathema… It means in 198X any random human is that evolved, already. The question is, how did Humanity reach this level of knowledge? And power?

Yes, power. Armageddon was stopped by… whom exactly? Humans! Humans only. Anathema, Newt, the Them. Meanwhile, Aziraphale and Crowley were gonna kill the Antichrist, a kid! A KID! And who stopped them? Madame Tracy, a stupid (I’m not the one saying), psychic, Jezebel-of-Babylon with a good heart. A nobody? No. A human.

***

The education of Humanity.

Let's stop to notice that Crowley and Aziraphale are adoptive parents from the get go, watching the kids anxiously from afar, wondering if they actually fulfilled their respective mission as an angel and a demon, not knowing that having kids goes way beyond giving them toys and feeding them applesauce. It's a life sentence. Your kids will always call you at ungodly hours, seeking comfort after a nightmare, no matter how grown up they are. There’s no escaping to Alpha Centauri, and forgetting about them!

What I find interesting is who Aziraphale and Crowley are, and how meaningful it would have been if God had actually chosen them to be the Godfathers of Humanity.

Crowley is the one who questions everything, right? And how does one learn? Through questions. Those who have children know what I'm talking about (no wonder God won't raise her kids herself, being humans or Jesus🙄). It is often said that Science (Man-made god) replaced God. And how does science work? Yes, questions again ! Goddamn, annoying, neverending, pain-in-the-neck questions… Curiosity is the first tool. It's curiosity Crowley injected into Eve, to tempt her into eating the apple.

Crowley is also the one who would suggest a suggestion box. Because he has… IMAGINATION…(here, you need to picture Aziraphale turning a turnip into… an INKWEEEELL… ). IMAGINATIOOOON…. That ability is very, very important. Should I say paramount? God being a writer, possibly a mixture of Pratchett and Gaiman, she can only treasure imagination. Imagination is what created Good Omens. Imagination is what allowed Crowley to stay in his burning car. It was Adam's tool to change reality. Human imagination brought War, Famin and Pollution to life and it's human imagination again, that of three quite ordinary kids, that destroyed them. Not a flaming sword, not an angel, not a demon, mere humans gifted with imagination. And free will. Gifts from a fairy godmother named Crowley.

Aziraphale? Aziraphale didn’t come empty-handed either.

Was he just passing by, fortuitously, when Crowley called out for help? Is it pure coincidence that they created the universe together in a no-sex-involved-whatsoever fashion? I mean, the higher-ups designed universes, universes, man! Big, complicated, extremely sophisticated things, but they couldn’t think of a system that’d be set into motion by a single angel? Come on… And was it just a hazard that Crowley and Aziraphale ended up together on Earth, with the mission of thwarting each other? (Balancing each other?)

No dice. What, then? Crowley is the darker shades of gray. Aziraphale is the lighter part of the spectrum. And God knows that. God knows that Aziraphale isn't as white as he looks, although he does look very white. How does she know that? Because she checked. And several times, if I were to guess. God sees everything. And yet, she asked Aziraphale what happened to the flaming sword. When he lied his way out, she could have punished him, but she just went quiet. She wanted to know 1) if he would lie, if he would dare stand up to Her to protect the children, and 2) if he would trust his inner compass.

Aziraphale has other strong suits. He’s very gay and bubbly, and fluffy, and fun, and embarrassing, and endearing, and adorable, and… yes, I’m in love with him, say you aren’t. At the same time, he is quite strong-minded and aware of being Crowley’s soft spot. He can have his demon do things to please him (to a certain extent), with just a cute glance or a frown. He is Crowley’s anchor.

What’s more, Aziraphale is very conservative, and not just where fashion and music are concerned. He has unwavering faith in God (I mean God, not the institution of Heaven) and nothing, not his love for Humanity, not his love for crêpes, not even his love for Crowley (not sure about the order here), will change that.

Last but not least, our favorite angel is intelligent. (Since it’s Pratchett and Gaiman saying so, it must be true.) He is the ONLY one to point out the existence of the Ineffable Plan. And the ONLY one to figure that it might diverge from the Great Plan. Without the need to hear it, he feels what the ineffable plan is. And that’s why he trusts God. Although he is able to admit the error of his ways, I don’t think he’ll be doing the "you were right” dance this time around. Third prediction. (Boy, do I wish that one isn’t accurate…)

Aziraphale and Crowley were chosen as godfathers because, together, they are the perfect balance, they are black and white and the entire spectrum in between. And somewhere in this spectrum is the most important thing in the universe. Although the ingredients may have been the same, I don't think Aziraphale and Crowley were created with the same recipe as the other angels. Neil just revealed on Tumblr that Aziraphale and Crowley together are a circle. They are perfection. This circle is what God wants for her children. A mind that has no beginning and no end, a God-like mind.

Aziraphale and Crowley intuitively know that. It’s the reason why they turn into an evil nanny and a good-hearted gardener, in hope their combined influences will make a real human being out of the Antichrist. It’s easy for them. Because, this is what they’ve been doing from the beginning! They spent their entire time on Earth playing the nanny and the gardener! For not one kid, but for all Humanity as a youngster. Aziraphale and Crowley are masters at it and it’s thanks to them that Humanity has learnt so much. Pay attention, it looks like they didn't do much, in the end, to prevent Armageddon. But they raised the kids who prevented Armageddon. Of course, the ineffable husbands got some help.

Earlier, I mentioned angels and demons being teachers. They’re all doing the same job, infusing humanity with both Good and Evil through temptations and blessing, having them make choices and watch the outcome. Here, I must say that in the story, (and in History) it feels like demons have all the easier parts, as their pupils seem to always be way ahead of them, from pretty much the beginning. “Yes, always this easy”.

“Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.” ― Terry Pratchett.

When Crowley creates the universe, what comes first? Darkness. He has to summon light into it to reveal the marvels it contains. Are humans like that? Darknesses that require some light (not too much, otherwise they’d go as blind as angels) to unravel their actual beauty? So. Angels bring light. And demons just have to make sure the darkness stays into place? Something like that. But… if angels and demons are both working towards God’s plan, how is it they keep bickering? Stop. Is there a scene, a single scene where they actually argue? I can’t remember a single one… They all want the same thing. Get the bloody job done so everyone can call it a day and go home.

Why then were demons demoted and casted away? Crowley doesn’t even seem to understand what happened to him…

I guess it’s time I talk about the rebellion and the fall.

***

The Principal

The Principal? Who’s that? The one above the teachers, of course! The Metatron!

THAT Metatron… You want to kill him right now, don’t you? You want to peel off his skin with a blunt knife, you… wait, he doesn’t have a skin… and he probably can’t die anyway. You want to drink his soul with the tiniest straw? Tie him to a chair in front of episodes of Dora the explorer? I feel you.

Not sure if the Metatron has a counterpart. In the novel, his counterpart is Beelzebub, but it doesn’t feel like they’re playing in the same league. I mean… God’s voice, right?

There is a theory going around in the fandom that the Metratron has been editing people's past/memories, using the Book of Life. That theory was written by an actual novelist and it did sway me. However, if it were completely true, it would probably bother me. First reason is I don't want what I already saw of Aziraphale and Crowley's first encounter to be fake, even in the slightest. Second reason is… If you have the power to edit people's lives, why be so subtle about it? Or does the Metatron think he can make surreptitious changes that God won't notice? Hm. I don't know. In the novel, The Book of Life doesn't exist. The one who can "arrange matters af is you never even existed" is Adam. Not sure if this goes against the theory or sustains it…

Here are my own theories. Plural. I gave that bastard a lot of thoughts. I’m afraid none of them involve the disparition of the eccles cakes, sorry.

At first, I had a theory in which the Metatron was instrumental in the rebellion and the fall. It went like this. The Metatron is the voice of God, the Spokesman, as Aziraphale put it. Only when God herself initiates a conversation do you get to talk to her directly. Otherwise, you have to go through the Metatron. (The reason why Crowly envies Job’s opportunity to at least "be able to ask the questions") The Metatron may decide to withhold your message AND answer whatever he wants. Could he have used his position to create a cleavage between God and some of her most powerful subjects? What for? To overthrow God and rule in her place. Demons were sent to Earth, of all the horrible places in such a vast universe, so they could draw strength from all the human souls they’d lure to Hell… So they would grow tougher, smarter and more dangerous.

But that doesn’t seem right. God can see everything, remember? Okay, she could be traveling between universes, leaving Metatrons behind, as governors. In that case, of course, things might happen that she doesn’t know of. Even so. She and Satan still talk to each other. They at least met once, when they made that bet about Job. Surely, any misunderstanding would have cleared up then? Besides, in the book, Crowley mentions talking directly to God, although She just smiled instead of answering. I don’t know. I do have another theory of the Metatron though. Way more simple. Everything was set up by God.

God needed teachers for her children, but with angels being all good, better and best, the kids would only have learnt half what they were supposed to know. Besides, how would they make choices? They would just become angels as well. Obedient, boring, sickeningly good angels. God has that already. So, how did God trigger the rebellion? By using the Metatron.

Let‘s take a moment to think about who, or should I say what the Metatron is. He is a voice. All he knows is what God can say. He is oblivious of everything God cannot or doesn’t want to say. By definition, he is that one part of God that can never be aware of the ineffable plan.

I came to think of the Metatron as an AI, with flawless logic. If SF has taught us anything, it’s that any purely logical mind would want to eradicate humanity, seeing it for the nuisance it is. The Metatron must think that God made a mistake. Maybe God went nuts? Eternity with Elgar… it kind of gets at you after a while… Luck of the devil, the Metatron is there to save the day! What’s that universe where angels go around falling in love with each other, anyway? Nonsense! It's all because of humans' malfunctioning minds.

The Metatron’s sacred duty is to destroy humanity, if it is the last thing he does. To achieve that, he sees to it that a certain number of angels go rogue. Then he sends them to Earth so when the second war breaks out, the entire human race will go as collateral damage. In this case, the Metatron is the one who picked the evil teachers. He did the dirty job, unbeknownst to himself.

Another scenario is that the Metratron has nothing to do with the rebellion and is only striving to stick to the Great Plan, after Armageddon went sideways. In that case, God herself picked the teachers.

In both cases, the question is, was there actually a war? We all noticed how vague Crowly is about the fall, even while talking to himself. "Next thing you know i'm going a million light-years, freestyle-dive into a pool of boiling sulfur." And he can’t remember the guys he is supposed to have fought alongside with. There is some memory tempering here, or I don’t know anything. Either no Great War at all, or a war without Crowley. My bet is a war without Crowley. I read something in the book, can't remember what exactly, but I jumped and said “There must have been an actual war!” Besides, one explanation for a disabled angel like Saraqael could be a war wound. I guess?

Crowley sounds like he loves God, as much as Aziraphale does. This scene, where he snakes around his executive chair, saying "You said you’d test them". Maybe it’s just me, but I read hurt and love in his eyes, love for the world? Love for Aziraphale? Love for God? The reason why Crowley is dead set against going back, isn't it because, or partially because he feels he was betrayed by the One he loved and trusted most? I don’t think Crowley could have gone against God and seriously, how much trouble can you get into, just for asking a few questions? But then, if you’re going to submit your questions to the Metatron, who can’t entertain the concept of a flaw in the system…

***

The final tests.

It's like shoving a knife into the heart of a cake to see if it is well cooked. There's no way around the knife I'm afraid. God needs to find out if her children are fully grown humans. But what does this mean for Her? What does it mean, should it mean, for any parent?

It should mean that the young adults are now able to think for themselves, elaborate strategies to survive on their own, fight and overcome whatever life will throw at them, and… become a better version of their parents.

This is no longer high school, lads. This is college. So exams come in two waves. Midterm. The students have to prevent/overcome/survive Armageddon. And they do.

Armageddon didn't happen. Free will happened. Adam refused to follow his predetermined path and asked both sides to stop meddling into people’s affairs so humans can start to think for themselves. His friends rejected the nightmarish world that was left to them as a legacy. Dog became his own dog and is probably playing hide and seek with cats right now. Anathema decided to stop living according to a book written by her ancestor, NO MATTER how useful and accurate the predictions.

Yet another message here. Don’t let people tell you who you are and what you’re supposed to do. Your life and every choice at every turn are yours to make.

Notice that both God and Agnes sort of vanish at the end of season one. Agnes’s book is burnt by Anathema, and God goes silent. As if something happened that changed the course of what was already written. It's like Adam said: what is written doesn't matter. You can always cross it out. The great plan stopped right there.

And the ineffable plan took over. The ineffable plan is written by human beings in a decade-long essay that will decide if they passed the final test or not. (Of course, they pass, the show is called Good omens! Another prediction, gosh I'm so good, this is beginning to scare me!).

At this point, I think God is satisfied already. I mean if God is a writer and her characters achieved enough self-awareness to write their own story, then… they're real! I suspect writers' secret dreams have always been just that. Playing gods, creating universes and bringing characters to life! Not as puppets, but as sentient beings who will do as they please once the author rests their pen (closes their laptop, let’s be modern… but without bebop). I'm sure Sir Pratchett, having tea with Death, is kicking his feet at this very moment, seeing how many fans have fallen in love with either Aziraphale or Crowley or both and are spending so much time imagining the rest of their adventures.

A clue in the book. When Anathema burns the second Book of Prophecies, the smoke takes the shape of a smiling Agnes who winks at the world. I will always wonder if anything was written in that so-called sequel… Agnes wrote her book for her descendants and God wrote the Great Plan for her children. They must both be very proud that their offspring have finally spread their wings!

Now Humanity has cut the strings and gone from puppet to real living being. And that's where the fun begins. Because there is more to being a human than meets the eye. And this is what season 3 will be about. Oh, I know, it doesn't seem like there is an invisible imho. It's because there isn't! XD

***

The Second Coming, or season 3.

The concept of the Second Coming confuses me a great deal. Because of Jesus. The story doesn't seem to really involve Jesus as we know him, the one and only, the miracle doer, the precious son of God. There is a Jesus who ends up on a cross, alright, but no one says anything about him being special or performing miracles or anything. At the same time, there is an Antichrist, miracles measured in lazari and a second coming ( of Christ, I presume?). I went and picked some people's minds on Reddit. They had several interesting opinions, involving the third baby, Greasy Johnson, Muriel being Jesus under cover, and angels not minding the boss's son who only got this far through nepotism.

We see Christ nailed to a cross in the opening credits of season 2 and we see him again on the banner of the resurrectionists. All this considered, it looks very much like Jesus will have something to say about what happens next. I hope not, for it would probably feel like a Deus ex machina to me. That said, I think that the most important thing about Jesus has already been stressed out, his message.

Anyway, Jesus or no Jesus, there should be, as mentioned in the Scriptures, mass extinction, resurrection, judgment and either punishment or reward. Unless… the Scriptures don't apply anymore, since the great plan went down the loo and the new writers certainly don't want to see the world go to ashes. Unless… Wait. Wait a sec. We're talking about… humans! Hh!!!! That's it. We're baked. Literally. Nice knowing you.💀

And so what? What if humans only achieve self-destruction? Their choice. At least they got to choose.

But that's not really what I expect from season 3. Again. Good Omens.

After not-Armageddon, humans were granted a little time to study further. What will they learn? I don't think there can be a not-Second Coming. That would really be underwhelming, not to say disappointing. There has to be a planet-size all-out war at the very least, with pupils going berserk against their teachers (serves them well for highjacking nuclear weapons designed by their students! ) Only when the teachers have bent both knees, can the students show… mercy, kindness, compassion.

Love?

Jesus's message was "be kind to each other". Neither angels nor demons know how to do that. Both are cruel, cold and unforgiving. Heaven wanted to kill Aziraphale just like Hell wanted to kill Crowley. God on the other hand, used Agnes's last prophecy to save them, from what would have been real death…

God is much more than the sum of her angels, Good and Evil. Mixing good and evil triggers a chemical reaction that is the actual secret recipe to God's purest, greatest form of power. Yes. Love.

Aziraphale and Crowley drew enough strength to perform a 25 lazari miracle because they became one AND risked everything to protect their former enemy. They showed compassion and granted forgiveness (not to mention hot cocoa!). Gabriel and Beelzebub only love each other. They're not perfect together. Aziraphale and Crowley grew feelings that go further and run deeper than just romantic love. They experienced and mastered every aspect of love.

Every day, it's getting closer, love like yours will surely come my way…

Love is the last lesson. And the last gift. Now I know it sounds like everybody will end up naked with flowers in their hair… I for one wouldn't mind such a scene… I mean, if it's for the sake of the plot, what can you do?👀

… Anyway, that's how the students, following the example of the masters, embraced both sides of their true nature to become more than Heaven incarnate or Hell incarnate. They learn how to love and pass the final test! Last prediction. Almost last.

***

“There was never an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it”. At the end of the book, (Warning! spoiler ahead!) Adam, "half angel, half devil, all human, is slouching hopefully towards Tadfield.

... for ever."

For. Ever.

Aw, I forgot a gift, I'm afraid… Eating the apple was the path not to death (for man was probably created mortal as everything else). Eating the apple was the path to immortality. Crowley did the right thing. And so did Aziraphale. Adam is immortal because he is a successfully completed human. He's not the only one. They who were created in the image of God, the children of God, have become…

new Gods.

After that? Well… I guess the Bentley will become her own car and go with yellow and the self promise never to play a Queen song, ever again. The new gods may throw Earth into the trashcan since it's worn out anyway. Or maybe they'll restore it? Somehow I'm not afraid for books. I have a hunch that books will survive… Perhaps some of the gods will join the distant lights that "may or may not be stars?" They'll be like seeds, they'll travel through darkness to create new universes, new god factories…

What? Aziraphale and Crowley? They don't have to choose sides anymore. They were always on the same boat. And God loved, loves, them both. They can just love each other and be who they want to be. Adam, who could read Aziraphale and Crowley's minds, said: “I know all about you, don’t you worry”. Everything will be just fine.

What are they doing right now? Not sure. They're writing their own story too. But I guess it involves flying at the speed of light (or the speed of darkness?) to find the best spots for having picnics and reading books and listening to nightingales. I'm sure they'll stop by Paris. Somewhere near my house? I know a nice place for crêpes…;)

[ladybracknellssherry]

Okay so I got a clip w audio of the final 15 Az eyebrow thing I was talking about. The quality is worse than garbage and idk someone is going to have to explain to me how to actually get clips of things bc I’m useless and prime locks out screen recording. If someone can get a better quality and share it’d make me so happy.

I put it under the cut because it's about 2 seconds and watching that flash on a loop against your will is nightmarish.

For the sake of the "somehow Az and Crowley were communicating subversively to each other / Az was trying to communicate something to Crowley" theory...

This definitely gives "Az is trying to eyebrow talk to Crowley." If you want to believe that. Looking out the window from where he's standing in the direction of where Crowley would be / is when he's fashion statue-ing on the Bentley at the end. What's Az trying to eyebrow talk about? Any number of mysterious things. Otherwise he’s just simply making sad eyebrows. Az is obviously stressing and sad and such. But I’m hooked on this right now and me being me am probably looking way too deep.

I never thought anything of it until I realized the soundtrack makes a point of it. "Hey check out these eyebrows - we're going to give a piano trill to emphasize it." Why? Mood? Probably. It just feels ... odd.

Say all you want about how GO would avoid doing something that can give Clues or hints to interpret the massive mysterious cliffhanger of S2E6 ... But they gave a mountain of clues to the body/appearance swap in S1E6 ... All of the time fuckery in S2 and chiastic structure and foreshadowing and parallels etc etc all give Clue. And of course there's the hidden easter eggish fact that Nightingale played in its entirety matches up perfectly with the brief snippet in the Bentley to the final shot in the credits. The final piano trill and that last smile in the elevator that looks a touch unhinged unless you have Nightingale playing. These two bits are the most simultaneously subtle/surreptitious/inscrutable yet very clearly emphasized expressions incorporated into the soundtrack that I've noticed in all of S2. There are other matches. But those are readily legible compared to these.

So, yeah. The eyebrow flex + piano pointing it out/emphasizing it is all more than a bit weird to me. It looks like it could very likely be communicatory. As if asking/saying "all good? all clear?" "all good here. all clear here." "you do the thing?" "now's a good time to do the thing" "understood" etc etc. Reminiscent enough of "Trust me" which was nearly invisible.

Other people have pointed out - what if he's not just looking out the window in those last few glances because he's looking at Crowley trying to make up his mind? What if he's stalling and making sure Crowley is there and giving him a signal? Would might to tie into the time-stop theory which would help to explain that FCKNGK CLOCK. That clock that keeps me up at night.

Why? I don't know why. Does it make much sense? I don't really think so. It could just be a brief sad eyebrow furrow. I'll survive if that's the case. I just can't get my brain to stop thinking about it. It feels so weird to me.

[exocynraku]

thunder spoilers under the cut!!! read at your own risk!!! here are my opinions on the book!!! i wrote this right after reading originally on the 4th and planned 2 post it on the 7th. it's not the 7th exactly where i live but the wiki updated with spoilers since it's the 7th over there so whatever

okay, so, overall, i liked it. i didnt LOVE it, but i liked it. sunbeams chapters were all great, and with nightheart travelling with frostpaw, he finally had the chance to not be an ass, and he wasn't as bad! i actually read his chapters this time, and oh my god frostpaws chapters were INCREDIBLE!!!! i loved her interactions with whistlepaw and smoky, and wow. she did get spayed, LOL! got spoiled for that early (thanks, assholes!) i was NOT expecting to meet the new cats of the park! i totally thought we'd encounter warriorclan! i'm a little bummed about that, but the cats of the park were all super nice to read about which was super nice. especially bee! thought i'm upset she has the same name as another cat.. wails the reveal of splashtail i totally expected, but i'm a little surprised over curlfeather. i know that there's been suspect she was a villain, but damn! i wanted to hold onto hope! but hey, her being evil is super interesting. plus, wow! she's in the dark forest! i guess i shouldve expected that, but it's felt like forever since a cat got sent there. (which i dont think is rlly true? juniperclaw went i think that was tbc? whatever, still feels so long ago) also i didnt mind that it was a travelling book! i know a lot of ppl HATEEEE travelling books, but i think there was still enough substance to make it interesting! now, that ending... er, hard to explain my feelings. i like cliffhangers because they make me really excited for the next book, but man! this one hurt bad! i want frostpaw to jump out !!!! raugh!!! also, waffle and wasp are cute! i'm happy theyre coming to the clans! we NEED more genetic diversity SOBS and honestly, with frostpaws thoughts right before leaving the park, with the clans needing to become less harsh and fighty, and more open, especially to outsiders? that was incredible! genuinely, genuinely incredible! and i hope they go through with it, i really do! berryheart is also an interesting character. if i'm being honest, i hope she leaves. not becaues i dont like her (i think she's one of the most interesting characters we've had in the series for a long time, even if she sucks), but because like i said earlier we NEED more genetic diversity in the clans! more cats with long blood lines need to leave or die, and new cats w/o long blood lines, or none at all need to start existing. all of the incest is pissing me off. so i'm glad that somecat with not a particularly long bloodline, but a big one (berryheart has like 70 siblings) is leaving. plus those other cats. last misc things, finally, some tree action! it's a miracle! i also like how there were mentions of 1: thunderclan being overcrowded (please please please mass exctinction event GO) and 2: tree being mediator, but never really having the chance to shine. also, cherryfall sucks. jeez louise! i used to like her for gods sake! spotfur and her kits were adorable, i liked ivypool in this book, and oh my god, brambleclaw finally gets less of a spotlight! overall, i liked it. not the most amazing book to ever exist ever, but it definitely got my excited for the next books!!! really happy with ASC so far and i'm pumped to see what's going to happen with it in the future.

also, with the cats of the park cats being introduced, i'll have to draw them! oh boy more work for me to do

[unethicallypleistocene]

I know I keep pestering you for snippets about Blake but I'd LOVE to see how he interacts with Rogue since their powers are somewhat similar! No pressure ofc!!

Pestering?? I just about let out a Victorian-level gasp! Your asks could never be any form of annoyance whatsoever, especially when it comes to snippets! I absolutely adore doing these, and I'm really feeling Blake come to life in my head the more I sit down and try to get some ideas out there. Thank you so much!!

"You arrive at a fork in the darkened road, the cloaked figures still hot on your heels. In your hesitation, one of them calls out, raises his sword- and that's where we'll end our session tonight!" There were groans around the table, along with a few hands thrown up in exasperation. "Ugh, who died and made you DM?" asked Jubilee, starting to collect everybody's dice. "As I recall, nobody else wanted the job," said Hank dryly, removing his glasses to polish them. "You all really give me no choice other than to end on a cliffhanger. It's 11:00 PM, for goodness' sake." "Not like ol' Gambit has anywhere to be," said Remy, propping his feet on the table. Rogue slapped his arm. "I didn't sign up fer one of your sleep-deprived moods tomorrow," she retorted, "especially not after your critical fail streak tonight." "That owlbear came out of nowhere," Remy muttered darkly. Blake stretched and yawned. "Regardless, I really think we should all be going to-" Blake stopped, detecting the tiniest cracking noise coming from outside the window. "Blake?" asked Rogue, eyebrows knitted together. "You guys head upstairs, I'll be up in a bit," said Blake quickly, throwing on his coat as he backed away from the dining room table. "I'm fine, I promise." He turned before he could register the rest of their confused expressions, hurrying out the back door and skittering to the southern treeline. "Hello?" he whispered, feeling stupid and determined and terrified all at once. The ground on which he stood began its telltale vibration, weeds sprouting around his boots. He felt something tug at the bottom of his pant leg. "Come on," Blake muttered, jerkily turning his head as he scanned the edge of the woods in the darkness. His vision caught on a lone antlered buck, eyes glowing gold. The buck flicked its tail and stared at him. "You again," Blake shuddered despite himself, "what do you want?" The buck stood still, eyes growing brighter in the night. "I need to know. Please!" Blake looked down at his hands, which rapidly becoming ensnared in ivy. "Blake! Where'd ya- Blake?!" He heard Rogue's voice, and it sounded too distant to be real. "Why won't you say anything?" Blake pleaded, the buck's gaze burning his skin. The ivy began twisting around his neck.

"For the love of- Can you hear me? Blake!" Rogue called out, speeding to her friend's side. His eyes were rolled back into his head, his feet bound by thick roots to the ground as the greenery started to strangle him. Rogue yanked off her glove and carefully tried to pull at a vine, only to get repelled the instant she touched Blake's skin. She huffed. "I'mma try something new, you just hang on." She sped a good distance away, took a deep breath, and flew at Blake with all her strength. She tackled him, pushing him into the ground, holding him tight. He gasped for air, the ivy rotting away as he gripped Rogue back, suppressing a sob. "I'm sorry," he said, his words coming out garbled between pained inhales. "You're alright," she replied, squeezing him, "you're alright."

[cuubism]

wip update

since I have a good number of actively-posting WIPs that some lovely people have been very kind about and invested in (and which I am very slow in updating), I figured it might be only polite to post a little update on where those are.

the melting press of the sun (dreamling) - Never intended this as a longfic, there may or may not be more than the 2 chapters it has now. I have a bit more written but it's disjointed and incomplete. I intentionally didn't leave any brutal cliffhangers on what I did post for this reason. We'll see if that one comes back.

Deja vu, Deja connu (dreamling) - The slowness in updating probably belies how deeply emotionally invested I actually am in this fic. Chapter three is just a major challenge--it's very long, covers a lot, has lots of fluff in the first part (fluff is kinda my Achilles heel, though not quite as much as wedding scenes, which this chapter also has) and a lot of heavy content later. But I have the whole fic outlined, a bunch of chapter 4 and 5 written in advance, and I'm super excited about the stuff that comes later, so it will definitely be finished, just... slowly. At least for this chapter.

In Waking Dreams (dreamling) - My current priority for an update. Chapter 4 just hit 10k and will probably hit 15k before its done (god help me), and I feel somewhat obliged to finish chapter 5 as well so I can post them in quick succession. Chapter 4 necessarily ends on a cliffhanger as it catches up to the events of chapter 3, but I feel bad about two cliffhangers in a row. But that one soon, I hope. (chapter 5 has a lot of the juiciest, long awaited scenes promised by the fic's premise, so I hope you will like that one when it's finally done 😅)

IRL (malec) - Fic that I have a tendency to get stuck on for 15 months, then write a ton of all at once, repeat. But I actually picked it up again the other day for the first time in ages, and I think I know all of the events of the chapter now, so who knows! Maybe I'll actually manage an update!

Subject: I Love You (malec) - Fic that I shamefully left with ONE CHAPTER remaining for a full year now. Honestly not sure why. Someday I will pick it up tho, I swear to god, or maybe I'll just cut the chapter short and make it an epilogue. (Actually maybe I do know why. It's another damn proposal/wedding scene. My absolute weakness and failure, I should stop writing them entirely)

mind & heart, body & soul (malec) - This fic haunts me, it follows me around 24/7 like a vengeful spirit that can't find rest. I can't wrangle it back into making any sense in my head, but for the sake of both my own sanity and the story's frankly frightening number of readers (I love you but you scare me), I've been trying to do one final chapter to offer some kind of wrap-up. Hopefully I can manage it.

Leviathan (malec) - My long held passion project that I have, in classic form, not touched in months. In fact I've been stuck on the same chapter I'm on now since probably 2020, when I first started writing the fic. This particular middle part of the fic is just vexing me to no end. At some point, I will decide on a course of action, inevitably flawed, and just power through that chapter (I say, for the 2nd year in a row). Why did I give this story two big villains again? Or think having a whole separate story arc in the middle of the fic was a good idea? Ah well.

in the palm of your hand (malec) - The one and only multichapter I finally caved and marked abandoned. I learnt my lesson with this fic about letting a oneshot expand into a completely unplanned longer fic. Boy did I...

----

I feel like I don't express it enough, but I really appreciate everyone who's ever read one of my fics, commented, kudos'd, chatted with me about them on tumblr, made podfics or art or translations, shared headcanons in my inbox or your own fics with me... I'm always blown away by the kindness and interest, and love getting to share little (or big!) stories with you and am so happy when you enjoy them ❤️ I love doing fandom with you.

[asterekmess]

A Bit of a Conundrum

I've been waffling about this for a long time, and as I've already vented about it to my discord, I wanted to open it up to a possibly larger audience of my readers. And also complain about it more. XD I write. A lot. I have. A LOT of writing. We're talking like more than 2 dozen wips sitting in my google docs, some with 14k, some with 114k words in them. Some with a specific ending in mind, some with no plot beyond what's already written. Fuck dude, some aren't even Sterek/TW! I was fortunate enough to have someone go on my ko-fi and do a monthly donation to me for a few months. They stopped, which I'll never be mad at, but having them there at all, having someone say "I'd like to support your writing just for the sake of supporting it" meant a huge amount to me, and it made me think about all of my wips.

I don't post often, or regularly, or..well at all, for months and months at a time. This is because I almost only ever post fics when they're done. it's a personal rule of mine, and not one I used to follow when i first started writing fic. It's one I came up with shortly after finishing "Wanted" bc I felt terrible and pressured when I had to take breaks during that fic and when I couldn't keep up with a regular schedule for people. And for a long time it was a good rule for me. It helped me not to feel pressured or overwhelmed by the worry of abandoning a project on ao3 and getting bombarded with comments asking where the next chapter is. But as I've continued writing over the years, my wips have gotten more numerous, while my posted work continues to trickle in. I'm a chronic long-fic writer (though my currently posted fics don't reflect that), which means it takes way more time for me to finish a fic than it does for me to get distracted coming up with a NEW idea for a fic. It's hard to finish work. But that doesn't mean I don't love my wips. They're incredible. Some of them contain some of the best stuff I feel I've ever written. Poignant words and phrases and meaningful moments. And looking around at them, I realized that anyone who goes to support me on my ko-fi, or considers following me on Ao3, or even just subscribes to a series, isn't really getting to see what I"m actually doing. They see a fic posted every 9 months, or every year. There's no real indication that anything they do is helping me regularly, that they're even supporting a Current Active writer. In light of that, I've been considering starting to post wips of mine. The problems with that are numerous and a bit overwhelming, hence wanting to hear others' opinions and vent about it ad nauseum. I've got lots of wips, and if I were to start posting them, I wouldn't want to toss the whole wip out at once. But posting a chapter at a time every few days or even once a week, while it would mean a lot of content coming out, it would be a lot of content that I haven't finished. Cliffhanger chapters, and unfinished stories that I can't promise would ever be finished. And I know I don't owe my readers anything, but it's still unsatisfying to post something without an ending. Then there's the absolute overload of possibly too Much content for people. Getting an e-mail every other day about a new chapter for a fic you've no interest in reading isn't fun. And on top of all that, is the editing. Often when I'm struggling with a fic, I find that i need to go back and change the beginning. In honesty, part of why I wait to post until I'm finished with fics is bc semi-regularly I'll get to the end of a fic, go back to the beginning and edit it all over again to make it more cohesive. To me there is no such thing as a 'finished' chapter. only a finished fic. If I posted as I wrote, then I'd either not be able to go back and edit chapters, or if I DID go back and edit my chapters, they would then need updated, and people who'd read the first 4 chapters of something would end up needing to reread the fic to get the full sense of what I'm doing. But at the same time, posting my wips would mean finally getting to share some stuff that's been gathering dust for years in some cases, finally getting to see people's reactions to them. Finally getting to know that even if I don't end up finishing it, at least people can enjoy what's already been written. And of course, finally getting to show people that when they support me through donations or comments or what-have-you, they're supporting an Active writer, supporting work being made every day, even if it's not FINISHED every day. All of these things are stuff I'm trying to take into consideration, and it's been a hell of a struggle. Plus, as I'm unfortunately trying to manage doing a part-time job rn, just getting up the energy for this stuff is a big BIG task.

If you've got any thoughts or strategic ideas, I'd love to hear them. If not, s'all good, I mostly just wanted to vent. XD

[cescalr]

New tag game: list ten of your childhood ships!

tagged by @babybeale <3... forever ago. Uh. Whoops!

[I will also state my current feelings regarding the ship, and I'll go into as little or as much detail as I feel like <3 I'm also. I have a sieve brain. I'm trying to remember what the fuck it was I shipped as a kid lmao. Anything I shipped, say, pre 2016, I think should count? ftr that means I was 14 or under when I shipped it.]

Nina/Fabian, from House of Anubis;

They're still cute. Better than what they pulled in the last season ;-; fabian and mara...... why...........

2. Sam and Freddie, from iCarly;

This show was just. Not good at writing romance. At all. It was bad at it. But I am very smart and know better than them (/joke) so I could do seddie justice. Er. Maybe trying to do that right now, actually. Shh.

[also, friend; jade and beck is so complicated, you're right. A fun mess, but still a mess lmao. Me and my rarepairs was always a fan of stuff that never ended up being canon though. Might as well put it next, I guess? Looking at your 3.... when it comes to icarly; we could not possibly have had more different opinions on the matter <3 lmao]

3. Tori Vega / André Harris;

I haven't watched it in years so I do not remember why! But I do remember that I did. I think. Don't - don't quote me on anything ever.

4. Willoz - from buffy the vampire slayer;

No gifs for them :( :( :( love them still so very much <3

5. Honestly, I'd steal your number 5 bestie, 6Teen was great. In the spirit of obscure animated TV shows, though - and It's been so damn long I forgot the names of some characters, had to look up the guy's name, lol - Zero and Vin from The Invisible Network of Kids. It left a profound impact on my psyche because they did something really fucked up in the last episode, plus left us on a cliffhanger, and then the show got cancelled </3 rip. Haven't watched it in a decade or so. No idea if it holds up, but I was super invested in these kids doing spy work and experiencing insane levels of trauma that would be ignored come each new episode </3. I was literally 8 years old <3. It has a TV tropes page and the entire show is availible on the Internet Archive, of all places, sooooooo I may browse. For nostalgia's sake. There are literally zero gifs available for this one, because. I mean. No shit.

7. Didn't watch any of that continuity - only got so far as Tracey Beaker Returns... alas. Anyway, my pic for 7..... hm. Sigh.

Stiles/Lydia, Teen Wolf.

This ^ is NOT romantic! she slams her mouth onto his in the middle of a panic attack. Babe. No. No. Regardless; I don't like it </3. They really. Oh god they really fucked up this one. Like a lot. Plus, they both just ended up with much better canon ships (stalia, marrish) that then got shafted for this mess to be the endgame and then the movie breaks them up anyway!!! OFFSCREEN!!!! they didn't even last 2 weeks!!!! fuck!!!!!!!! I don't like them. But I used to. Playlist, for proof. I feel like this counts, because I shipped them when I first watched the show as it aired (I was 10 when the show started), but I did still ship the pairing until well into my teens (16 or so) before I wised up (the show made them very bad in a really boring way. Not that they weren't bad before. Love how they both do things that are otherwise reprehensible but the show frames them as romantic for some fucking reason </3 I was like 13 when I saw this kiss on screen. They're lucky I did research and didn't just take it at face value or I could've gotten some really bad ideas about what's healthy in a situation like this!).

8. Zikki (Zane/Rikki), H20: Just Add Water;

Season 3 does not exist <3 [also, the way they wrote the 'cheating' plotline was fucked up. That woman planted one on him!!! he did not consent!!! Why are we supposed to be blaming him for being sexually harassed in the workplace!!! No!!!]. Still ship them fr fr.

8. maf;lkasjd;f yeahhh. Think if you watched friends as a kid, it was inevitable you'd ship rosschel, the damn thing was pushed so hard. Stand in regretful solidarity;

For really obvious reasons (being that it is rosschel); hot damn no I do not!

9. Harry and Ginny, Harry Potter.

Ignoring the horrendous movie adaptation, when I read the hp books I basically just defaulted to shipping whatever was canon. Luckily for me, the canon hp ships are actually pretty good ones! If you ignore the canaries in the room. (I. Do not. Famously. Well. Infamously.) As for Hinny, whilst its a garbage ship name, the pairing itself is pretty great <3

10. kaljdflkasdt thank god I don't remember jack shit about watching glee for the first time! the sieve brain is a blessing in this one occasion. I've already mentioned in another (tagged <3) post my vaguely-relevant hsm ships, though, so..... hmm. What should I pick.... let's think.... I'm kidding. I don't need to think.

Shoker is a major missed opportunity in ME, and I've been mad about the choices for my fem!shep for YEARS because. Look. Kaiden she did not cheat on you. You left!! You accused her of being evil and fucked off after she was resurrected!! what else was she supposed to think other than 'guess he doesn't want to date me anymore. Rude.' And. You could have sex with Jack but not romance her, that was locked to male characters >:| biphobia [Jack can have sexual relations with women, but her only real connections are to men. Rude!]. And, Liara in my games always turned herself down for romance because she assumed my shep wanted to date Kaiden because she's not a total dick to him and there's no way for me to clarify otherwise, also people making assumptions :/ not great. Plus Li becomes the shadow broker and it's a whole thing, so that doesn't really work out narratively for me anyway. Can't romance Miranda. Can't romance Tali (wouldn't anyway - Tali/Garrus <3). Refuse to romance Garrus that is just so platonic a dynamic it's not even funny. Jacob cheats and dips, so fuck him. Like... all of the fem!shep romances are terrible (or Trainor, I guess, but she's... kind of. Nobody. She's Just There. Sorry. It's not narratively interesting enough for me.) and Joker was right there and augh. Augh! Still ship. Still mad about it. Hatboy Project is doing the lord's work! I salute thee soldier in thine endeavours. Waiting to replay LE until it's been finished <3.

<3

If anyone wants to pick this up, go for it!

[theultimatenonbinarynerd]

New Who Kid Watches Classic Who: Genesis Of The Daleks

Introduction

Classic Who is something I owe a lot too even though I have never seen it. Without Classic Who my Grandma never would have gotten my Mum into Doctor Who and without my Mum getting into Doctor Who I never would have become obsessed with New Who. Its a generational cycle in my family that only my brother has broken.

With all of Classic Who being put on BBC I Player well most of it. (I'm gutted about an unearthly child) I decided it was time to get into the era that thrived my Grandma (Rip) and Mum's love for scifi. But before I started from the beginning there were three episodes I knew I needed to check out, let's say they were for lore curiosities sake. The TV Movie, Genesis Of The Daleks and The Five Doctor's. I'll share my thoughts on The TV Movie and The Five Doctor's in separate blogs, for now I gotta talk about Genesis Of The Daleks. It's gonna take me a white to get use to the 6 part stories and dramatic cliffhangers but I'm willing to give it a chance.

Okay I will say as a disabled person I see what Russell T Davies means but he needs to rewatch this episode as The Disabled Villian trope becomes worse if the character is motivated by their disability Davros isn't. I completely understand the thoughts though I just hope that skit was non cannon or an alternate universe and they treat him with respect. He was a manipulative menace in this episode and its pretty ironic that in the end he got out manipulated. I hope his other appearances are just as good and they explain his survival well.

What I Liked

There's a lot I loved throughout this six parter it was very tense and climatic. I also thought our tardis team of The Doctor, Sarah Jane and Harry Sullivan worked together masterfully. Whilst The Ponds reminded me of A Married Couple Babysitting their goofy Son, These three reminded me of Two Siblings trying to keep up with their Older Wise But Mad Sibling. It's the first time I've seen Sarah with a Doctor other than 10 and 11 and they work together beautifully.

Firstly I have to praise the incredible cinematography. Man the shots despite this episode being filmed so long ago are absolutely beautiful even on a wide screen TV. The angled shadowy shots of the Daleks are really menacing and it adds to the dark tone of the story as it is. All the settings including the clean white aesthetic of the karld labs create a deeply unsettling feeling in your stomach. I also think the cuts to Davros make you very uneasy as well, his introduction and reveal was absolutely magnificent.

Secondly I have to praise the incredible themes and philosophy incoperated into this story. Toxic Fans like to scream and yell at Moden Doctor Who calling it woke when it always has been. Terry Nation crafted a really good story about the ethics of war and genocide even if you know that the very think you plan to stop might become an earth shattering unempathetic killer. It was very heartbreaking but seeing all the karld scientists wiped out by the Daleks was so important to include as it shows the deep juxtaposition between Davros and The Doctor which makes them brilliant rivals. Despite all the Daleks will do The Doctor can't bare to initiate a genocide of them in their earliest form, a mistakes that will haunt The Doctor's character for many years to come. Whilst Davros would happily kill his own men and play a Palpatine chess like game between The Karld's and The Tharls just for the survival of his creation. Its a story with very important messages and themes that the audience need to evolve. Its also a bold one as we finally get to see the orgins of The Daleks and why they are so Heartless. My mum pointed out but I already knew that the Daleks are definitely a metaphor for a certain group in World War 2. The Cybermen too you could argue.

Finally I have to praise the high stakes and thrills. My mum stared at my gasps and started laughing when I said that Classic Who seems to be more of a blood bath than the New Series. I know Bad Wolf and Parting Of The Ways was brutal but this story is just on a whole other level. As well as laughing with me she did hold my hand too I was absolutely heartbroken at some of the deaths and was routing for The Doctor, Harry And Sarah to survive and over come everything. Not to mention the cliffhangers showing this deep danger are characters were in. I was glued to my seat anticipating what might happen next. Nobody was safe and I definitely felt for all the characters that fell to The Daleks peril. This story is definitely worth it for The High Stakes alone.

What I Disliked

Okay so it might be because it's early days of me watching but I didn't like the cliffhangers as they felt disruptive to the flow of the story and very repetitive as half of the cliffhangers were are tardis team in peril or being kidnapped. My mum saids its just the fever of being a new who baby and that it was exciting at the time but for me it was a bit frustrating.

Secondly I feel like Sarah who was beautifully written in New Who didn't get much too do at all. It feels like she was running around for the sake of it and I would have loved her to play an even bigger role then she did. Whilst Harry got to help The Doctor rescue Sarah I felt like Sarah only got to hang around with other characters for the sake of it. I loved Elizabeth Sladen and will forever miss her so I want to see more awesome moments with a younger Sarah.

Conclusion

So those are my first thoughts after watching Genesis Of The Daleks. It was a really good story arc to the point I can tell why it haunted The Doctor so much even in The Time War. Poor Eight especially was haunted by it. I think it still holds up well despite the effects. My mum's right I just gotta lose myself in the story considering it's media that came out during her time. Very invested though. I can see why so many people like Four but like how everyone loves Ten he's probably not gonna be fav Classic Doctor as I tend to route for the underdogs.

Davros is so menacing and I generally can't wait to see his other appearances in Classic Who apart from the one where he's a floating head as I do think that's problematic and it makes me uncomfortable. I seriously admire the boldness of the stories and can see how they've shaped New Who. I hope New Who can make the Daleks as scary as they were in this episode. I miss when the Daleks weren't just a running gag.

I'm gonna definitely be excited when I get back to this Tardis Team. Sarah and Harry are companions that beautifully compliment the 4th Doctor. I really am excited for this journey though as a whole.

This has been Mel with a classic who review over and out.

-Melody-

They/Them

[greenerteacups]

do you promise to finish lip heart? I’m no book 3 and getting increasingly worried that I’m getting so invested.

This is a sort of weird thing to ask an author, isn't it? Like, what would a "promise" even mean in this context? Obviously I care a great deal for this story, and don't want to see it abandoned. It's a huge undertaking that I've devoted months of my life to. I even finish each book in advance of publication, so that in the event that I do have to stop writing, the story will conclude on a natural beat. If I stopped working right now, and never added another word, Lionheart would still run through the end of Goblet of Fire, and conclude on an appropriate note. I don't do that for my own sake — what would I get out of it? — but for readers, because I know how much it sucks to get stuck waiting on a cliffhanger. I want to be able to tell them: "I am committed to at least making sure that you get resolutions to all immediately active plot threads and character arcs, even if I can't guarantee the big ones." I was a reader of fanfic long before I was a writer. I'm trying to take care of you, I am.

Here's the thing, though: I'll go out on a limb and bet that most abandoned works on AO3 were not started with the intention of abandoning them. In some cases, the author got sick, or got fired, or something happened to their family, or — and this might be where we disagree — got tired of writing it, and did something else, and that is a valid and healthy choice. The author is a person before they're a content creator, and fanfic isn't a paid gig; if you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong. Also, from the reader's perspective, nobody should want authors working on fics that don't inspire them anymore. You do not want your story being finished by an author who doesn't love it.

So, no, I don't promise. I can't. If something happens to me, or to my family, or I get laid off, or any other thing that takes priority in my real life, I am not going to put myself in a position where I have to break my word. Lionheart will be running as long as I have the time, energy, and passion to write it, or until it's finished. That's not a guarantee; like all WIPs, it's a risk. If you want to take that risk on me, then I appreciate your trust immensely, and I promise to do everything I can to deserve it. But I'm not going to promise 600,000 more words of fanfic up-front.

[1jemmagirl22]

Ah yes, not even a day later and I've finished all of Nightbane, this should surprise no one, but I think, as I wait to decide my next read, we should have a fun little chat about Nightbane, shall we?

Because for fucks sake she did it again and I didn't even realize! You can't understand the squeal of excitement I pulled at the end of this fucking books, I have never loved four straight chapters of twists more, never, never, okay? The iconic class final hundred pages of Queen of Air and Darkness has nothing on this, oh ya Emma and Julian are giants, well fuck me to Sunday cause we got life bound to the enemy (cliffhanger 1), that vision of the enemy murdering a village is actually a memory of the MC's cue existential morals breakdown (cliffhanger 2), and if those weren't fucking enough (which they already were), oh we get the final fucking piece de la resistance, the most brilliant, hilarious, delightful brilliant line I have read in years "Take your hands off my wife." (cliffhanger 3). Cue my actual screaming, no, no, I was already dead at life bond in which if the villain (but let's be real he's a Mikaelson villain man, I love him more than the hero love interest and he could kill Oro and I would not giev a fuck, like sure I like Oro just fine but he has nothing on Grim). But a fucking secret marriage? They got married? And the necklace? The necklace she's had since book 1, that she can't take off, is a wedding ring equivalent, that calls him to her? What the fuck man! Am I dead yet? Is this perfection incarnate? Is this the closest I'll get to a Klaroline esc relationship in literature? Cause like seriously everything he does he does for her, and it's gorgeous!

Let's have a little chat about the fucking banger moves this boy (I say as if he isn't 500 something years old) has pulled. We have the "who did this to you" which I saw on Instagram and got me to read the book in the first place, classics, brilliant, who doesn't love a guy that commits murders for you? Next we have like all of the memories in the last hundred pages, this boy does everything for her. And how could I forget him arriving, to a trap she set to kill him, and seriously threatening his own army that if anyone touches her they are dead! No, I genuinely can't with this! And of course, the marriage, I love a good marriage, a secret marriage, so secret even the MC who has some memory problems and herself can't remember it, even better. Lastly, can we appreciate the beauty of him going 'once you remember you'll come back to me' and knowing hard stop of course she'd come back, they were in love, so in love in fact that they got married!!!!!! I can't, your honor, I love them, I love them for the Klaroline parallels, I love them for the fucking banger lines, and I love them for the magical bloodline soul magic tie marriage bullshit they got going on as some ancient evil threat starts to destroy everything around them!

Anyway, there's my Nightbane review, my iconic this shit deserves it all rant. While we're on it, I will most certainly be making edits for them once the film adaptation comes out, I will be forcing my best friend to watch it with me, and I fucking will be editing them to Lovely, No Time to Die, Broken Crown, I Can't Pretend, and every fucking song Ruelle has ever released! Thank you, for coming to my Ted Talk. Now I have another book to pre-order.

[hypnotichyenascrunchyrollcatchup]

Tasuketsu -Fate of the Majority-

Broadcast: Wednesdays at 01:59 (JST) Genres: Action, Drama, Suspense Themes: High Stakes Game, Psychological

Synopsis The story follows a group of five in a world where people have suddenly disappeared. A mysterious self-proclaimed "Emperor" gathers five people together through anonymous messages and has them participate in a game. Participants answer the question "Do you want to live or die?" The game has only one rule: "Majority dies."

First Impressions

I'm honestly still trying to process what I just watched. The setup is a very standard survival game, but something happens at the very end of the episode that has me even questioning how to talk about it. The thing is, it's not exactly a twist because it's something that was well within the limitations of what the "Emperor" described, but I just wasn't expecting it to go there. I suppose I'll discuss in more detail under the cut, but first I'll try my best to discuss the rest of the episode as if that didn't happen.

So to start, what first jumped at me was the main character's lack of a personality, like I can't even remember his name despite them forcing a pun with it twice. Before the Tasuketsu begins, we get some personality traits hastily explained to us by the main character's best friend, and some mention of his parents being out of the picture, but we never really see any of this. He's just like "sorry I can't hang out my mom died on this day" and then it just skips to him laying in bed. It seems like the only things we know about this character just exist for the sake of the story, like he's this Gary Stu with the one flaw being he's bad with computers but it barely seems to come up.

Besides the main character being milquetoast, there's some baffling choices. The rules of the game are so convoluted I could barely follow, which is not a good sign for a first episode. It may be on purpose though, as the main character explained to the nice girl whose name I also forgot, The Emperor might be keeping things from them. The way he just says to her that he wants to find The Emperor with so little information to go on. Also there's a scene where a dude that didn't show up to the meeting place on the second day finds a gun and threatens to shoot the kid with earphones. The kid's like "Where did you find that" and he goes "LIKE I'LL TELL YOU" and then literally tells him with no further pressure.

Anyway, under the cut is spoiler territory so watch the episode first if you care about that kind of thing.

So the first elimination question of the show is "Male or Female" so the episode ends with the cliffhanger of the main character being eliminated because he's in the majority. Now I don't know what to think about the direction of this show. The opening had all these boys, so was that a red herring?

As I'm writing this I had this thought. They kept bringing up that the name of the game meant Absent Majority. Absent, not dead. So I started thinking about what if all the supposed dead are really there but only in spirit? That would be an interesting twist but on second thought I don't think that's it.

Earlier when the protagonist was talking to this one girl explaining his theories about the rules of the game (which btw why didn't he discuss with the whole group) they went to look for a scrap of paper to write a question on and found a "privilege" paper. This aspect of the game was extremely glazed over (probably on purpose) but what I think will happen in the next episode is that the main character will survive elimination because of that privilege. It's pretty disappointing because that'll mean it's a bait and switch cliffhanger which is pretty fucking cheap imo.

[hard-core-super-star]

no because literally, in a single ask there are many different topics and the answers just get longer. I imagine you opening your inbox and seeing some aks that look more like the digital bible itself😶

I'm telling you! I'm behaving now. I changed.

I'll wait, and I already have my doubts about something but I don't know if it's a reference. the 119% thing.

totally, just like they did when they guarded at all costs that Kate would be played by hailee. It would be really funny if the Nightwing phase hadn't just been a phase.... unless...👀 I also don't know how well-known this mafia game is, but I've literally never heard of it until now. you're good at FIFA? for further scientific research. i- i never played GTA, my mom was ok with me playing mortal kombat and seeing the most graphic and merciless deaths, but not with me stealing cars and running away from the police 😔

okay, if I go watch it for the gay shit and I come out of it sad I'll blame you and you'll pay for my therapy. If she's supposed to be an irredeemable villain then she did something really fucked up, right? because I'm kind of more of a fan of villains..... to a certain point... um yeahh..of course

I'm literally eating myself up because I want to know what this cliffhanger is, I mean, the show was cancelled... knowing this isn't going to ruin my experience, is it?

queerbait, queerbait is everywhere- oh, the denial, it's okay, thinking like this can keep you sane, but it's between ava and sara? wait, I got lost hwjakksskskk you defend flash until you possibly can't anymore, but only watch for caitlin? how does it work? RIGHT? It took me a while to like caitlin exactly for that reason. and don't judge me, but it got tired to a point where I wasn't even rooting for barry and iris to get together anymore. they almost made my hair gray for a while, but I recovered.

now I understand why there's SO MUCH supercorp fics, these people are drooling and surviving on crumbs- think with care <3 hdjskjsk

– 🌟

i’m happily surprised and impressed that we've managed to talk about so many things at the same time and, despite the slight confusion sometimes, we still have MORE to say. it's not often i find someone so willing to read my paragraph-long responses and then RESPOND with their own paragraphs. [and needless to say, i absolutely love reading your responses, even if they're long]

mhmm, we’ll see about that.

it technically is a reference but i don't know if you're thinking what i’m thinking. and if you're not one of us is going to end up looking like an an idiot 😶 [it’s me, btw]

i mean, he's technically still my favorite superhero so i guess the phase still isn't over. i’m just too gay to obsess over a man the way i obsess over kate. i don't think it's that well known but i love it. idk what kind of research you're doing that requires this knowledge but yeah, i’m pretty good at FIFA. not like super amazing or anything but i’ve played it all my life so i think i’ve developed some skills. funnily enough, my mom was the opposite way. mortal kombat was too violent but planning heists and stealing cars was fine. [but not until i was like…10 or something]

babe, i hate to break it to you, but i can't even pay for my own therapy so you're on your own. stop asking questions because i WILL write an essay on her. basically, she does do fucked up shit BUT she's also heavily, HEAVILY, traumatized. i can't get into it without giving out too many spoilers but as the show goes on, we learn she's genuinely just a heavily messed up person and NOT a Joker type of villain who causes pain for the sake of it. [she's also not a sociopath, no matter how many times the characters say she is smh. she's also queer-coded af so there's that]

it's probably my fault for bringing it up everyday lmao. it doesn't ruin anything at all, it's just frustrating. they do finish the plot of season 7 nicely so that's why i just ignore the cliffhanger. it was supposed to tease season 8 but then season 8 never happened. the thing that pisses me off is that the CW didn't bother to tell the writers or the producers or the ACTORS that they wouldn't be getting another season.

sorry, i phrased that weird because it's technically a spoiler. the queer-bait is between zari and a new character hence why i didn't give many details in case you decide to watch the show again. sara and ava aren’t queer-bait at all, they're just queer 👍 it doesn't work very well but like the flash still has some really good things in between all the shitty writing. [that's another reason to watch batwoman, btw, their writers are out of this world] plus, like i said, caitlin snow was part of my gay awakening so it's not like i could just ditch the show even while it was going downhill. i don't judge you at all, i hated their relationship in the last few seasons. idk how they did it but they made me dislike barry at some point which is a crime because he's my boy!!!

akdkkdkskk that's a perfect way to put it, no further comment is necessary. i’m definitely not thinking about it 😶

[tribow]

So I watched Blood-C

Continuing my Blood streak, I have finished watching this too! I have actually seen Blood-C before, but I never finished it due to being spoiled about the ending. Now that I actually watched the whole thing and saw the full context...I'm dissatisfied.

In fact, that just about sums up my thoughts on Blood-C: "Dissatisfied". Throughout much of the story, all I did was wait for the answer to "Why?"

Why must Saya do what she must do? Why does this character know this? Why the dog? Why the school? Why did they go back? Why are these monsters showing up at specific times of the day?

It was clear that several characters had answers to these questions. There's a lot of very unsubtle foreshadowing in the dialogue to make it obvious.

Alone, this wouldn't be a problem, but nothing else in Blood-C hooked me. The characters all felt pretty weak. Saya has 0 agency until ths end, and most of her interactions with other characters are small talk, direct orders, or questions that dont get answered. The dialogue feels a little unnatural and to make matters worse, there's so much wasted time!

I tried to come up with reasons as to why so many innocuous scenes happen and none of them made sense. It's especially frustrating because of how heavy this anime is.

If you didn't know Blood-C is quite infamous for being an extremely violent gorefest. Many people have written it off as a guro porn due to these violent and very bloody scenes. I'm not exaggerating; people get torn in half, heads bitten off, crushed, amputated, impaled multiple times, and its a bloody mess.

Honestly, despite all that....I disagree with the notion that Blood-C is gorey for the sake of it. The violence has a place in the story that works and makes sense...IS WHAT I'D LIKE TO SAY. For the most oart it's true, but in certain episodes during the second half there's some deaths that are practically comedic or unecessary. I was so ready to have my expectations shattered and then some guy gets killed by the shards of a window impaling him are you kidding me?

Ugh, there's one genuinely good thing I can say about Blood-C and it's the action. Wholeheartedly, Blood-C's action is some of the best I've ever seen. The choreography is really cool for nearly every fight that happens.

You know how most anime will have characters monologuing their plans or reactions to their opponent? They'll shout their attacks. Sometimes the fight almost seems turn based. You can't read the pace of the battle without background characters expositing about what just happened.

As a big fan of a good-ass fight scene these issues stick out to me. I'm happy to say Blood-C lacks many of these problems. You can get an idea of what a character's battle strategy is just by watching their actions it's so cool how these animators were able to achieve this consistently. Production IG was not slacking here.

It sucks that action that goes this hard is tied to a story that ultimately just fails for me. Each character's book closes in a terrible way. The mystery that unravels only left me questioning the logistics of it rather than keeping me intrigued.

I wish I liked this. I wish I could say the despite all of the extreme violence Blood-C has something great going on in there and I just can't. Don't recommend.

Now....you might be aware that I have been watching every anime related to Blood and I didn't mention the connection between the other anime at all in this whole review. Well, that's cause Blood-C has a movie to follow-up that cliffhanger and since I rambled so hard here I'll save that discussion for that movie.

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

The cliffhanger!! I need to know the context, the background, and their IDs. I need to know the story behind the Don dinner for my sake.

Did you receive enough information by now? (Also, why IDs? #insert autistic confusion)

First date and shower sex?

That depends on who you ask. It was Mike's second date with Dani. Dani's first date with Mike. Apparently. Dani is not always that smart...

Dani also works on her insecurities

Mostly this. As long as Mike keeps treating these miscommunications as programming issues I think they're golden.

They are so cute!\

Aren't they? 😭😭 I'm sorry for being a fan of something I wrote myself, but like... I love them together???

Side note: the dynamic in the group is so fun and fresh. Like I love the way all the personalities complement each other and make the house work well but also stay freaking pristine and clean. August for the rescue! (Of course, he's the control freak here.)

dlakdjflasdkj Thank you so much ❤️❤️

Then I wanted to scream because Dani knows Sy!!! What the fuck?!

Hahahahahahaha I LOVE HOW EVERYONE WAS LIKE "WHAT IS HAPPENING" AT THIS PART and I'm really sad I'll probably never write that good a cliffhanger ever again...

Part 3 - With flying colors

Part 1 | Part 4 | Masterlist

Pairing: Mike x OFC (Danielle)

Warnings: Smut! 18+ (Minors DNI). shower sex, oral (M receiving), swearing, general awkwardness. There's some footnotes... Those always scare me...

Summary: Dani spends the night at 179th Crescent Street and meets the roommates in the morning...

Word count: 5.8k

If you catch any mistakes, just know that Daddy August doesn't take kindly to tattletales... 😏😏

A/N: Not a lot of smut here - but some of it. Lot's of ~social interaction~. Also, for anyone trying to figure out where exactly these guys go to uni: CANDYLAND, okay? I'm most familiar with Dutch uni's, but some US College-type things snuck in... It's a hot mess, and we're gonna keep it that way.

Finding the perfect movie to watch on a date is not easy. The tragedy commences as soon as someone shoves their Netflix account in your face. Let’s be really clear about one thing: Everything on Netflix blows. There’s too much and too little at the same time, the suggestions are all terrible, they always have that one movie that reminds you of the one you’re actually looking for, but that’s never on there. It’s a nightmare. Then, there’s the selection process itself - and with that a shocking amount of social protocol to navigate. As a woman, you obviously can’t make any unsavory intentions too obvious. Which means you can’t pick something that’s so bad that he instantly knows you’re not interested in watching, but you don’t want to pick something you actually end up watching. And it is slim goddamn pickings in that ‘don’t mind watching, but don’t mind not watching’-category. 

“Hi, guys!” It sounded dull, what with the door being closed and everything, but it was definitely Mikey. 

Someone else, whose voice you didn’t recognise, replied to his greeting. “Don’t you have company?” 

“Yeah, speaking of: Could you keep it down tomorrow morning?” Mike again. Who was he asking? He’d said ‘hey guys’, plural. Who else was out there?     

“Of course.” That was definitely a second mystery voice. 

“Thanks! G‘night, guys! Nice to meet you, Elena!” Mike’s voice got louder until you could tell he was right outside the door. 

“Hey!” Mike smiled at you when he walked in. He quickly shut the door behind him. “Pick something?”

“Eh, no,” you said. Why were you blushing? Why was your heart already out of control? 

“Stakes aren’t high, babe,” he walked over and pressed his face into your neck. “Probably won’t see much of it, anyway.” His intentions were probably just sweet and cheeky in a 'can't keep my hands off you' kind of way, but your insecurities really saw their chance and took it.

“That’s the only reason I’m here, isn’t it?” You knew it. You fucking knew it. It took everything you had to not burst into tears; they already burned behind your eyes. 

“Are you kidding me? I like you!” Mike looked at you, entirely confused - the only thing missing were cartoon question marks over his head. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. How many times had you heard that before? Mike closed the distance between the two of you and took your face in his hands. “I don’t take girls I don’t like out on dates, Dani.” He looked at you, brows furrowed, one side raised. And that smile. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from his lips, your thoughts went from “punch” to “kiss” and back again so fast it gave you an emotional whiplash. 

Your voice was barely more than a whisper when you finally said something: “You’re not exactly taking me out, now are you?” Fuck, you could just about kill him right now. It wasn’t that you had an issue with hooking up, absolutely not, but you did have a problem with being led on. 

“Woah, okay, back up.” He put his hands on your shoulders and stepped away from you. “So we agree that this,” he gestured at the both of you, “is a date?” 

You snorted derisively. “I’ll agree that I thought this was a date, until about two minutes ago.” 

Mike breathed in deeply, his head fell back and you could practically see him count to ten. 

“Okay, we agree that when you stepped through this door, like, two hours ago, you thought this was a date, then?” The way he held you messed with your head; at arm's length, hands heavy on your shoulders. Intimate, but distant... You just nodded in reply to this question. 

“And so did I. Still do.” He said it so matter-of-factly that you almost laughed. When he took another deep breath, it seemed like he had a better handle on himself than before. 

“Okay, so I mentioned taking you out on a date, and you said that this wasn’t ‘out’,” he thought about that for a second. “Does that mean that you think this is the only time we’ve been together that the word date could refer to?” 

“Mike, could you fucking stop treating this like a programming issue?” It was your turn to grow impatient. 

“How is this not like a programming issue?” He retorted. “If I don’t get the output I’m after, something’s gotta be wrong with the input. Just… Humor me, okay?” You rolled your eyes.

“Alright: yes. Mostly because you asked me out two days ago, and I haven’t seen you since.” 

“Okay, I see,” Mike grinned. God, how that annoyed you right now. “Dani, when I asked you if you wanted to go to the movies with me, and you said yes, and we, y’know… Went.” Oh Jesus. “I meant for that to be a date. I’m sorry if I wasn’t clear about that.”

You tried to convince yourself that this could have happened to anyone. It had happened to you, but it could have been anyone. Ariel and Sloane would have a field day if they heard this. Despite that, you were still going to tell them. Mike looked at you questioningly. 

“You didn’t kiss me or anything,” you murmured, while you looked at the floor.

“Too nervous,” he chuckled, “that’s what I tried to make up for when you came in.” The distance between your bodies got smaller as you stepped forward, your arms reaching for him, and pulling him in. Strong arms wrapped around you and squeezed gently. With a sigh, you let yourself be enveloped by the warmth of his body. 

“See,” he said softly, his head buried in your neck, “fix the input, get the right output. Programming issue.” 

“Damn, computer nerd,” you laughed as you nudged him with your shoulder as best you could. All of a sudden, he put his hands back on your shoulders and pushed you away. For a second, you were afraid you had offended him with the nerd-remark, but then you saw his face. On it, was hands down the dirtiest fucking grin you had ever seen in your life. He licked his lips - you had to choke back a moan when he did: it was so incredibly sexy.

“What?” You asked, but he just looked at you. “Mike, what the fuck is going on?” 

“You hooked up with me on what you thought was our first date.” There were three options: you were losing your mind, needed glasses, or he found that thought very entertaining. 

Your cheeks burned, and you were sure he could tell. He followed up on his observation with a single word that set every nerve in your body on edge: “Hot.” 

The kiss that followed ended way too soon. When he let go of you and stepped away, you noticed it was quite cold. You made your way over to the bed so you could get back under the covers, but Mike grabbed your waist when you passed him and grinned at you. The sudden touch - and the cold - made you shiver. You looked up when Mike chuckled. His eyes summarized him perfectly: horny and cheeky.

“Well, I’m going to take a shower…” You didn’t need much time to pick up on that hint.

The bathroom wasn’t big, but it was nicer than you’d expected. You didn’t realize you were looking around with an open mouth until Mike pointed it out. 

“It’s just so… clean.” It was nothing like the student bathrooms you were familiar with - especially not the ones in houses with only men living in them. Or mostly men - or any men. Hell, your own bathroom - and your house was all girls - was messier than this. If by messy you meant: ‘regularly looked like someone bombed a Sephora’. You just couldn’t connect the state of the room to the idea that it was shared by four guys. 

“I am one hundred percent sure August will commit bloody fucking murder if we make a mess of this place,” Mike laughed, as he turned the water on, “and I’m about eighty percent convinced that Sherlock won’t think twice to help him cover it up.” 

“These guys sound colorful,” you said hesitantly, not quite sure what to make of the remark. 

“Oh, things get interesting, for sure,” his laugh echoed a lot less now that the water was running, “but I don’t really want to talk about my roommates right now, if you don’t mind.” 

“Well, what did you want to talk about, then?” The whole false naivety schtick worked very well on Mike, you noticed, as you closely watched his reaction to your doe-eyed coyness. He stepped around you, with his signature playful laugh on his face, and reached out to lock the door. In the meantime, you let your sweatpants drop to the floor. Luckily, his t-shirt was long enough to cover you up - you knew you wouldn’t be wearing it for much longer, but it was nice to not be completely exposed. 

“I wasn’t planning on talking much, ba-” the shape of his mouth changed from the interrupted a into a silent o. As his eyes changed and his mouth morphed - once again - into a devilish smirk, you were certain that this mischievous piece of work would be the death of you. 

“I think that’s mine.” He said dryly, holding out his hand to signal that he wanted his t-shirt back. Now that you no longer felt in control, shyness started to set in. Your fingers rolled the hem of the fabric between them, and it suddenly felt extremely hot in the room. He noticed - of course he noticed! It’s Mike, and he noticed things nobody noticed. As far as he was concerned, it wasn’t always a fair trade against missing things no one else missed. That’s what he’d told you right after you had asked him why he was like that - he had quoted Awolnation’s Sail1 by means of an answer. 

“C’mon beautiful, I want that back,” he grinned, his tongue darting briefly, wetting his lips. The only thing you could think about was the way he called you beautiful, and the hungry look in his eyes. Very slowly, and as sensually as you could manage, you started to undress. Your fingers trailed your thighs, your hips, your stomach, to finally linger at your chest before pulling the shirt over your head and tossing it to him. Before he could get to you, you stepped into the shower. 

“Your turn,” you giggled softly, and blew him a kiss. 

It took him less than ten seconds to join you. Hands wrapped around your waist and spun you around so fast that you were sure you'd both slip and fall. When you didn’t, you looked at the non-slippery floor in surprise. 

“One of us almost broke his neck once,” Mike said while running a hand through his hair, “and we tend to learn from past mistakes.” 

“And this guy,” you laughed, “did he happen to be you?” 

“I can neither confirm nor deny that.” His face told you more than enough. Even with his hair all wet, and in this horrible bathroom lighting, Mike was cute. The horrible lighting probably wasn’t something you should have thought about. Why did it have to be so bright? And there was nowhere to hide! You looked around, almost frantically. There was one place to hide, or at least conceal most of your body from his sight. You leaned into his body, and he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you even closer. He was hard, and the feeling of his cock against your body made you wince. 

“Sorry, baby,” he apologized, “can’t help it. You’re just so fucking gorgeous.” The way he said it was so sincere, so reassuring, that you finally allowed yourself to relax and melt into his embrace. The heat of the water running over your back really helped. You traced the muscles of his back for a while, and he moaned quietly at your touch. After some time, you moved your hands to his chest, resulting in a groan that sounded almost offended. 

“Sorry, my hands are getting a little cold,” you said without thinking about it. 

“Imagine how my back feels,” he retorted. You must have looked really guilty, because his signature grin broke through the almost cynical mask on his face and he laughed. “It’s okay, baby, I would’ve said something if it wasn’t.” He cupped your face in his hands and kissed you. There was a rough edge to it that made your heart pound in your chest - a roughness that hadn’t been there before. For the second time today, you could hardly believe what this guy did to you. Mike was grinding against you as his mouth left yours and dipped into your neck, instead. Your fingers snaked into his hair and pulled him closer while he licked and nipped at the skin of your neck, sucking the most sensitive spots. He occasionally moved up to moan into your ear, and it drove you absolutely wild. Hot water, cold air, soft lips - there were plenty of sensations to choose from, and they all seemed to turn you on one way or another. You both let your hands wander over each other's bodies while entangled in that very wet kiss. Shocked by your own initiative, you reached a hand between your bodies and wrapped your fingers around him. Mike’s mouth found yours again and he turned both of you around so he could lean back against the wall. You stroked him a couple of times, chuckling softly as he moaned into your ear. It felt great, seeing him like this. He sucked your bottom lip in between his teeth. 

“No, keep going,” he groaned into your mouth when your hand stopped moving. You pulled your lip free from his grip and moved to his ear. He shivered when you licked his earlobe, and you felt his cock twitch in your hand. 

“Is it good?” You whispered. 

“Mhm,” he nodded, “very.” You kissed his neck below his ear, then his jaw, his throat. The sound he made when he realized where you were headed2 was charmingly depraved - you couldn’t smile any wider if you tried. Unfortunately, you hadn’t thought this all the way through; the shower floor was rough on your knees, but you figured you’d just have to suck it up3. The bigger problem was the water: most of it came down straight on your head right now, and it made the task at hand4 significantly more difficult. Luckily, Mike reached up to solve this little problem. Part of you expected him to hog all the water and leave you there, freezing, but he didn’t - you decided that these levels of consideration deserved a reward. He struggled to keep quiet as you dragged your tongue all the way along his length. It seemed less scary now. You easily settled on the comfortable depth and rhythm you had before - with similar reactions from Mike - yet something in the back of your mind encouraged you to take it a bit further. Slowly, carefully, you took more of him into your mouth. It wasn’t easy, but the ecstatic squeal that Mike let out made it more than worth it.

“Fuck,” he breathed so softly that you could barely hear him over the sound of the water. You could tell he was trying really hard to stay still, which was very much appreciated. It was already difficult enough to focus on not choking without having to worry about him bruising the back of your throat. His ragged breathing and the slew of profanity that erupted from him as your lips finally reached the base of his cock were beginning to make you feel very good about yourself. You should have known - right when everything seems to go well, tragedy strikes. 

“Hey, lovebirds, get out of the fuckin’ shower!” The voice appeared suddenly, accompanied by the slamming of a fist against the door - hard. Twice - and it startled both of you. Mike’s brilliant reflexes made him jerk his hips, which hurt - like a bitch, by the way - and made you gag. Your reaction, however, was far worse. As soon as you could, you let go of him and curled up on the floor in the opposite corner of the shower, making yourself as small as possible. Sloane’s hysterical laughter echoed through your head already. How exactly were you going to tell them this? We were getting it on in the shower and I was going down on him and it was going remarkably well, until his roommate knocked on the door and startled me so much I bit him, or something? Actually, that was probably exactly what you were going to tell them - before dying of embarrassment, that is.

“Sy, fuck off,” Mike yelled back through gritted teeth. That name sounded strangely familiar to you, you just couldn’t figure out why. Not that you were really trying to. “I swear to God, I’m going to fucking kill you!” He turned his attention to you, pulling you into his arms. You hadn’t even noticed him getting down onto the floor with you. “Dani, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” It was nice to rest your head against his chest. 

“You’re asking me?” It sounded like a bad joke. “What about you?”

“I’m fine, come here.” He chuckled. “You never answered me.”

“Mortified, but not hurt,” you declared in a surprisingly upbeat way. 

“Noted,” Mike nodded, “then, if neither of us are hurt, do I have your permission to find this whole thing fucking hilarious?”

“Maybe tomorrow,” you said, but you were already laughing. 

Mike owned a suspiciously large amount of pillows - for a man, anyway. He’d tossed all of them into the corner, and then he’d grabbed you and sent you flying the same way like it was absolutely nothing. Now, you were curled up beside him with your head on his shoulder while you played with his hair. It was still damp from the shower. 

“So, who else lives here,” you were already pretty anxious about running into any of the guys in the house tomorrow morning - to the point of wanting to escape out the window in the middle of the night. 

“Alright,” Mikey smiled, “no need to be nervous. They’re all great guys!” You hid your face in his shoulder, embarrassed at how he always just knew. Maybe you were just anxious a lot, that was entirely thinkable. You didn’t get a lot of time to think that through - and you probably shouldn’t have wanted to, anyway - because Mike continued: “You’ve met Marshall - eh, Walter. We usually use his last name. Criminology major.” He paused again, trying to organize his thoughts. 

“Ok, on the ground floor, we have Napoleon. We usually call him Leon - you get why. Does something along the lines of Business Administration, with a minor in Art History.” Art history - not immediately something you had expected to come across in a house like this. 

“First floor: Marshall. And then Walker, eh, I mean: August. Third year Political Science with a minor in Criminal Justice." 

"The guy who would kill you for making a mess of the bathroom." 

"I feel Walker would kill me for a bunch of reasons…" Something about the way he said it made you wonder whether or not Mike was joking. You couldn’t help but point out that this Walker guy didn’t sound very nice. 

"Nah! He's great! Very consistent, I like it. He's a good time when he's drunk." 

"He sounds like a jerk, Mike."

"And he kinda is, but he also isn't." He laughed at the puzzled look on your face. " He’s complicated. You'll see what I mean."

"I'll take your word for it. Who's next?"

"Charles Brandon, he…" Mike's eyebrows shot up when you interrupted him. 

"Ladies man, very much opposed to the concept of monogamy. Little respect for other people's relationships. Does that cover it?" 

"Just about. He majors in Political Science, same year as Walker, and he's very good friends with the dean's son," Mike continued the profile, "He's a great wingman, too." He added thoughtlessly. 

"Don't need to know, Mikey!" You shoved him so hard he almost fell over.

"Ow! Sorry! Second floor; Geralt. Majors in Mythology and Folklore. And then Sy, the guy who…”

“Made me almost bite your dick off?” A sarcastic laugh escaped from your throat. You absolutely dreaded meeting this guy; he was already responsible for one of the most awkward moments of your life - so far - and you still couldn’t shake the thought that his name sounded very familiar. 

“Yup,” Mike laughed, “he’s cool though. Not a great wingman, had a habit of stealing my chicks... OW! Would you stop that, I’m just joking.”

“Are you?” You hated when the insecurities hit you like this. 

“Well, mostly. Trust me, I don’t miss striking out at the bar.”

“Do you miss… not striking out?” You looked at Mike, waiting for him to say ‘no’. 

“That sounds like a trap, I’m not going to answer that.” Smart man. You shrieked when he tickled you. “Anyway, that’s Sy. Then upstairs; Sherlock. Holmes. Third year Law and second year Philosophy, last thing I heard he was also taking some classes in Psychology. He’s not even nineteen, by the way.” It took you a while to process all of that. You had enough trouble with one major, let alone two. And did Mikey just say this guy was not only your age, but two years above you? Mike saw your face, and laughed. “He’s a genius.” 

“I think I’ve heard of him,” you said. You weren’t quite sure where you’d heard the name before, but it was unusual enough that you remembered it very distinctly. 

Mike’s next sentence cleared up that confusion: “Oh, and he’s the first violinist of the university orchestra. He and the second violinist, Elena - I actually just saw her for the first time - practice together every Saturday afternoon. He usually starts in the morning, though, but I’ve asked him to keep it down.” 

“And he said he would?” Sherlock sounded like the friendliest guy in the house so far.

“Oh, yeah, he never makes a point of it when we ask. But we let him have the two or so days before a concert, that’s the deal.” 

“So, with seven other guys in the house, he never gets to really play?” You wondered out loud. 

“Oh, no, you’re safe until about eleven. But he’s good, a billion times better than any alarm. I stopped asking him to keep it quiet for anything other than a potential hangover a long time ago.”

“But you did ask him just now?”

“Yeah, for you. Didn’t want it to wake you up if you didn’t want that.” He presses a kiss on your hair. You buried your face in his neck, in hopes of hiding the fact that you were blushing like crazy, but you were well aware that Mike was onto you.

“And the girl? Are they, like, together?” You never imagined that you’d be so invested in the goings-on in this house.  

“We don’t know for sure. Leon keeps track of the bets. I’m pretty sure all of us are in on one of those, at least. I believe I’m out twenty if he doesn’t sleep with her by Christmas.” Ah, there it was: The kind of stuff you expected from a house like this. You rolled your eyes and pulled the comforter snugly around you as Mike put on the movie you’d settled on. 

Walking into that kitchen was definitely one of the scarier things you’d ever done. Luckily, there was only one person in it when you and Mikey got there. His appearance was striking, with the silvery hair and very light-brown eyes that were almost the color of honey.

“Morning,” the guy said stoically when you walked in, and he put the newspaper he was reading down on the table. 

“Danielle, Geralt. Geralt, Danielle.” You were really grateful that Mike took care of the introductions. “Coffee, Dani? G?” Both of you nodded. The kitchen was big and bright, and looked well taken care of. You noticed that the appliances weren’t falling apart like they were at your house. 

“You can sit down, I don’t bite my roommates' girlfriends,” Geralt said dryly. 

“Just your own?” It was out before you even realized you opened your mouth in the first place. You were about ready to sink into a hole in the floor when Geralt laughed. He didn’t get a chance to answer, because someone else stepped into the kitchen. 

“Damn, Mikey, she might actually be able to survive this circus!” How many Brits lived in this house? And why did all of these guys look like they had run away from the covers of magazines? The guy in question turned around to you: “Charles, nice to meet you.”

“Hi, I’m…” 

“Danielle. The girl who stole my wingman.” He extended a hand to you, and you took it with the intention to shake it. Instead, he brought it to is lips and placed a soft kiss on the back of your hand. 

“Hands off, Brandon,” Mike slapped him against the back of his head with a teatowel. “And take Leon, if you need a wingman so badly.”

“Leon doesn’t need a wingman, girls flock to him offering services in exchange for a discount.” Charles started laughing, while your confusion grew. 

“And some of those girls, I sent to you,” a new voice retorted. The kitchen was quickly becoming crowded. “Or to Mikey.” You saw Mike make a not-so-subtle gesture in your direction to signal the newcomer - whom you guessed had to be Napoleon - to shut up. 

“I’m sorry, didn’t see you there. Napoleon, call me Leon.” He actually shook your hand. “If you ever need anything, term paper, answers to a test, talk to Mikey.” He laughed. This guy was dangerously charming. 

“Thanks, but I don’t suck dick for good grades.” 

“Well, maybe computer science,” Mikey said with a wink. You stared at him, unable to believe he just threw you in front of the bus like that - careful not to let your mouth fall open: you were sure it would look even weirder than it already did. Luckily, Geralt caught your distress and kicked Mike in the shins. 

“Thanks, I couldn’t reach.” You said sourly while Geralt grinned and the rest laughed. Mike put two cups of coffee on the table and sat next to you. Charles took the last cup from the pot and left the kitchen with it.

“No coffee?” you asked Mike. 

“Not if I want to stay awake,” he laughed. When you looked at him funny, he pointed at his head. “My wacky brain,” was the only explanation he offered, and then he shrugged. Leon took it upon himself to make a new pot of coffee. 

“Walker here?” A somewhat familiar voice sounded from just outside the kitchen. It belonged to Walter Marshall, whom you had met when you arrived yesterday. 

“Don’t think he will be,” Geralt answered. You noticed that his voice startled you - despite having heard it before. It seemed to go against some law of nature for him to speak. 

“How so?” Mike was often a tad too curious, but this time you didn’t mind - it sounded like there was some kind of drama here, and you were invested already. 

“Anjelica showed up.” For anyone who lived here - or anyone else who knew who Anjelica was and what she was to August Walker, that was enough information. Mike turned his head to you. 

“Girlfriend,” he said plainly, and you figured you could fill in the rest. 

“Not if you ask him,” Leon scoffed. He leaned casually against the counter, waiting for the coffee to brew. 

“He loves her,” Geralt interjected dryly, as if that settled the matter. 

“You hear anything?” Mike asked with a filthy grin on his face. 

“I hear everything, Mikey,” Geralt sighed. Your eyes went wide and your face turned red. Leon and Marshall laughed when they saw it; Mike tried to grab your hand off your knee, but you pulled it away. 

“Ooh,” Leon and Marshall sounded at the same time. Leon murmured something along the lines of ‘someones in trouble’, while Marshall slapped the back of Mike’s head and told him: “You tell a girl about the roommate with the super senses before things get serious, Mikey.” 

“What are they talking about, Mike?” You hissed at him, absolutely beyond furious. From the corner of your eye, you saw Leon pour himself a cup of coffee, before holding the pot up to Marshall, who nodded, but didn’t dare speak - they were a little too keen to see how this would play out. 

“I can hear Sherlock play the violin,” Geralt said calmly, “he’s three floors up, and using a practice mute.” You were just about ready to slap Mike in the face and storm off; this was definitely something he could have shared before all of yesterday happened. 

“It’s exhausting enough as is, so believe me when I say I don’t listen to everything.” He still wasn’t looking up from his newspaper. “Besides; if something is ever… repeatedly annoying…” he chose this time to shoot a meaningful look your way, “Let me put it this way: I’m sure it’s not the reason headphones were invented, but I thank my lucky stars every fucking day that they were.” Now all five of you burst out in laughter. Leon hurried to answer the door the second the doorbell rang, and didn’t return. It wasn’t long, though, before another housemate walked through the door.

“Marshall.”

“Walker.” Ah. The infamous August Walker finally made an appearance. He turned to you as soon as he set foot in the kitchen.

“You must be Danielle,” he said, “nice to meet you.” Whether he assumed you knew his name, or simply didn’t care if you did, you didn’t - and couldn’t - know. He grabbed the coffee pot off the counter, only to find it empty. “Oh for fuck’s sake,” he muttered under his breath. 

“Better make plenty, Sherlock’s on his way down and Sy just woke up. And I could do with another cup, too, if you don’t mind.” Geralt said. 

“Then why, pray tell, don’t you do this?” August hissed as he turned the kettle on.

“Alright, I could use a second cup as well, but now I know better than to ask you for anything in the morning, so why don’t you move out of the way and let me do it?” You shocked yourself; you were never this forward. Geralt made a half-attempt to hide his impressed smirk behind his paper, while Marshall and Mike didn’t try at all. Even August had trouble keeping his face in check - unsurprising, it had to be exhausting to frown that goddamn much.

“Charles was right,” Gerald chuckled, “you might be able to survive this circus.”

“The biggest clown is already mine,” you sighed as you got up and waved at August to get out of your way. The boys - including Mike - laughed. 

“Is there any coffee left,” someone asked. The voice was soft and polite, and sounded like its owner was in desperate need of coffee. 

“Coming up!” You said cheerfully as you pressed the button on the coffee maker. 

“First time here and they already put you to work?” 

“A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do if she wants coffee,” you laughed, “and I couldn’t ask Mike to do it. His coffee is terrible.” Geralt and Marshall raised their cups in agreement while Walker murmured ‘Amen’. Sherlock chuckled, somehow sounding a lot like a British version of Mike. The five of you drank your coffee mostly in silence. After August had finished drinking his, he made a cup of tea. On his way out of the kitchen with it, he was almost knocked over by Mike as he went to take some orange juice from the fridge. 

“Sorry, Walker!” He said. August just mumbled something unintelligible as he went back upstairs. Mike shrugged and put the carton to his lips. You weren’t surprised that this was a habit of his, but you’d expected more protest from the other guys.

“We tried,” Sherlock answered your question - nevermind that you hadn’t actually asked it, “he just gets his own carton, now.”

“You’ll get used to the unusual communication,” a female voice said, “Anjelica Madden, hi!” She greeted you with a hug. “Sherlock, Geralt, Marshall and August you don’t even have to ask anything once,” this woman was awfully cheerful in the morning, “but Charles, Sy, Leon and that dork over there you have to ask everything twice, so it evens out.” She disappeared about as quickly and suddenly as she had appeared. 

“Speaking of Sy, he’s taking his sweet time,” Marshall noted. 

“Probably taking a shower,” Sherlock responded, “I understand it was occupied for quite some time yesterday.” Geralt, Marshall and Mike looked at each other in surprise. It wasn't like Sherlock to say things like that.

“And on a similar note,” Mike laughed, “have any of us won any bets yet?”

“I heard her leave, so my guess would be ‘no’,” Marshall added. 

“You would be correct,” Sherlock muttered. All of a sudden, he looked so much younger than the rest of the guys in the kitchen.

“Will she be here after lunch, though?” Mike asked curiously as he got up and turned to you. “Breakfast?”

“I have no reason to assume the contrary.” Sherlock replied dryly. 

“There’s food in the house?” You exclaimed quasi-surprised.

“There better be, I’m starvin’,” a familiar voice sounded behind you. Finally, now that you weren’t concerned that you had maimed Mike, you recognized the voice. Your legs felt like they were made of lead when you turned around while praying it wasn’t true. Unfortunately, when you finally looked up at the man who had just spoken, your suspicions were confirmed. 

“Ari, help!” You groaned into the phone as soon as Ariel had picked up. 

“Dan, what’s up?”

“I met his housemates - all of them, it was an experience, holy shit, more on that later. But, bitch, I…”

You heard some mumbling in the background - it was probably Sloane. 

“Girl, Slo is here, I’m putting you on speaker.”

“Hey babe!”

“Slo, oh my god, sit down. Ari, you too. Remember the guy from orientation?” There was no point in drawing this out any longer; you had to tell them. 

“You mean your spectacular Southern stud, the Don of dinner down there? The prince of pussy eating perfection?” Sloane yelled in your ear. 

“Enough with the alliterations, S.,” Ari laughed, “clearly, we remember. What about him?” How were they not connecting the dots on this? Normally, you were the one who was slow to pick up on these things. 

“Nathan motherfucking Syverson is one of Mike’s goddamn roommates.” You felt like you were about to cry. It stayed awfully quiet on the other end of the line. 

“So, red or white?” Ari asked in a deviously perky tone. You could hear Sloane’s muffled laughter in the background. 

“Red,” you sighed.

 

A/N: Whoops, some footnotes. 1: “Blame it on my ADD” is the line we're talking about... 2: Pun intended 3: Pun not intended. Happy accident. I promise 4: I am so sorry

[minniepetals]

You best believe I'm going to reread and then SCREAM AND CRY in your inbox all over again, EVERY SINGLE TIME I REREAD. Because...its like the PAINFUL ANGST never lessens...EVER for me. It will always have the same visceral RAW PUNCH to the feels, to my shredded heart that I think it'll make me MORE AND MORE achier everytime I read. I MISSED SPAMMING YOUR INBOX!🥺😭 you'll see a lot more of me! Hope you've been eating and drinking well and taking care!

Listen. When we started this CMAR journey I didn't know or CARE how long it was going to be because its YOUR work and I will forever love, cherish and support every fic with all my heart

AND when it got longer I WEPT because YES. The "villain" arc showed somehow both growth...(?) Cos she moved on, she wasn't going to let herself be trampled upon again but it also was... heartbreaking too? Like an ACHY growth because she reached her breaking point...she was broken far BEYOND her breaking point but she's still alive. Even if is shes holding on to living for the sake of revenge, for the sake of getting BACK at what was taken from her, broken from within her...even if she lives with the burning grief and anger to make them PAY she's living. Because after the divorce I genuinely wondered if she'd maybe die 🥺😭 and the boys find out that way what they TRULY did... cos her "father" was the most worst monster...beast... DEMON I have not enough words for how much I cry with anger at the thought of him and the long line of filth and monsters that hurt her...

BUT. Point being...I'm forever going to stick with Y/N to the end. And then forever on after that. Because some stories LINGER. And this one has settled in my broken bruised heart. And will never leave.

For this beautiful heartwrenchingly painful angst. I will forever and always cherish and look after this era. For the MC of this world. However her story ends...it won't END you know??

ANYWAYS I'M BACK🥺 AND I MISSED YOU🥺🥺

asdfghjkl i'm so glad you're liking the angst lmao. personally for me, i'd like to read an angst piece after we've reached the end or at least have gotten to the fluff because i hate just being in the unknown and knowing i'll only hurt further and scream at characters and get all anxious about how things will go down. i think i just hate cliffhangers in general lmao (that's why i can't start an anime series or a kdrama that hasn't concluded yet cuz i'll always be wanting more and i'm too impatient to wait).