#I know how to fight depression I know I know

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Anxious Attachment Style

Common Anxious Thoughts, Emotions, and Reactions

THOUGHTS

Mind reading: "That’s it, I know s/he’s leaving me."

All-or-nothing thinking: "I’ve ruined everything, there’s nothing I can do to mend the situation."

"I’ll never find anyone else."

"I knew this was too good to last."

"I have to talk to or see him/her right now."

"S/he can’t treat me this way! I’ll show him/her!"

"S/he is so amazing, why would s/he want to be with me anyway?"

"I knew something would go wrong; nothing ever works out right for me."

"S/he’d better come crawling back to beg my forgiveness, otherwise s/he can forget about me forever."

"Maybe if I look drop-dead gorgeous or act seductive, things will work out."

Remembering all the good things your partner ever did and said after calming down from a fight.

Recalling only the bad things your partner has ever done when you’re fighting.

EMOTIONS

Sad ⚜ Angry ⚜ Fearful ⚜ Resentful ⚜ Frustrated

Hopeless ⚜ Despairing ⚜ Jealous ⚜ Hostile ⚜ Vengeful

Guilty ⚜ Self-loathing ⚜ Restless ⚜ Uneasy ⚜ Humiliated

Hate-filled ⚜ Uncertain ⚜ Agitated ⚜ Rejected ⚜ Depressed

Unloved ⚜ Lonely ⚜ Misunderstood ⚜ Unappreciated

ACTIONS

Act out. ⚜ Attempt to reestablish contact at any cost.

Pick a fight. ⚜ Threaten to leave.

Wait for them to make the first reconciliation move.

Act hostile—roll eyes, look disdainful.

Try to make him/her feel jealous.

Act busy or unapproachable. ⚜ Act manipulatively.

Withdraw—stop talking to their partner or turn away from him/her physically.

Attachment classifications come from watching babies’ behavior.

Below is a short description of how anxious attachment style is defined in children. Some of their responses can also be detected in adults who share the same attachment style.

This baby becomes extremely distressed when mommy leaves the room.

When her mother returns, she reacts ambivalently—she is happy to see her but angry at the same time.

She takes longer to calm down, and even when she does, it is only temporary.

A few seconds later, she’ll angrily push mommy away, wriggle down, and burst into tears again.

Where Do Attachments Styles Come From?

Initially it was assumed that adult attachment styles were primarily a product of your upbringing.

Thus, it was hypothesized that your current attachment style is determined by the way in which you were cared for as a baby:

If your parents were sensitive, available, and responsive, you should have a secure attachment style; if they were inconsistently responsive, you should develop an anxious attachment style; and if they were distant, rigid, and unresponsive, you should develop an avoidant attachment style.

Today, however, we know that attachment styles in adulthood are influenced by a variety of factors, one of which is the way our parents cared for us, but other factors also come into play, including our genes and life experiences.

Source ⚜ More: On Attachment ⚜ References ⚜ Avoidant Attachment

[sage-nebula]

I've been suicidal many times in my life, and while I could talk about those experiences, given what this post is about, I'd rather talk about something else.

My boss at my previous job was not just my boss. He was my friend, my mentor. I'd met him as a student employee; I still remember the day I went in for my interview, and I asked to speak with "Mr [name]," and the other student employee who answered the door made a face and said, "Hey, Mr [Name], this girl is here to see you" when he let me in because my boss never wanted us to be so formal with him. We were on a first-name basis with him, always. I was nineteen, and super nervous interviewing for my first job that wasn't retail or food service, but he cracked jokes and made me feel welcome. He treated all of us like that.

He was just a really good man. He always stood up for us, every time the university tried to do something that would make our lives harder or less safe. I made a Facebook status once about how I was harassed by a gas station employee near the university, and he commented telling me he'd bring his bat if I needed it. When one of the supervisors ended up overstepping boundaries in a big way with us student employees, he worked overtime to make sure that we would all be safe. When I got promoted to a supervisor position after graduation, and took it upon myself to oversea the yearly Secret Santa tradition for the students (meaning I didn't participate because otherwise I would know who my Secret Santa was), he decided he wasn't letting me go without a present and got me one anyway, despite my insistence that it wasn't necessary.

Unfortunately, he had his own demons to fight. He was going through difficult stuff in his personal life. He told me a lot about it; I was a confidant for him, and at one point he told me I was the only person he could speak to about any of it. More unfortunately still, as much as I wanted to be there for him, I was also struggling to keep my own mental health on track. It was around this time that I was looking into starting antidepressants / anti-anxiety medication for the first time because of how much I was struggling, and I was really focused on getting all of that sorted so that I could stop being tempted by the trains I heard pass by my home every night. Because of this, I didn't check in on him regularly. And so, when his boss called me one morning before my shift was supposed to start and told me that he had taken his own life, I was consumed by more than just shock and grief; I was crushed by guilt.

You see, I blamed myself. Largely because he had told me I was the only one who could confide in, I couldn't help but think that if I had checked in on him more regularly, if I had been there, this wouldn't have happened. I could have prevented it. I could have saved him. He wouldn't have taken his own life, and it wouldn't have been one of his young daughters who found him like that. Not only had I lost a friend of nine years, but I felt like I failed him.

I know now that isn't the case. There were many factors involved, not the least of which being it turns out I wasn't the only one he confided in after all. But it took me a long time to reach that point—a long time until I could honestly say that I didn't feel like it was my fault.

In the midst of depression and suicidal ideation, it can be incredibly hard to see the importance that you have in other people's lives—the place that you have there, that no one else can fill. I know this intimately, because it is something that I struggle with regularly. But even if you can't see it, you have to hold in the forefront of your mind that the importance is there. The impact will be felt. Not only do people care about you, but those closest to you will hold the weight of responsibility for your life on their shoulders for a long time. If nothing else, you don't want that for the people you care about, do you? You don't want to do that to them, do you?

You are not the only one harmed by your suicide. In fact, you're the one who will feel the impact the least. Death doesn't hurt the deceased; it only wounds the living. That's why we have funerals: it's for the sake of those left behind. But no amount of funerals or celebrations of life can assuage the pain left by a suicide. It doesn't help. Notes don't either.

If you're in a place where you're ideating, reconsider. Reach out to someone close to you. Tell them where you are, mentally, and have them come be with you. Believe me when I say that they would much rather sit awake with you all night, than wake up the next morning to a message that you're gone.

Give us the chance to be there for you. It's all we ask.

periodic reminder that your death by your own hand will wreak more havoc on the lives of those you know than you are ever capable of imagining and if you need a sign not to kill yourself this is it. people care more than you know & i am one of them

[drabblesandsnippets]

Whatever You Need

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Plus-size female reader

Summary: (3.3k) Bucky comforts you during a rough time. 

Background: Reworking of this snippet. It’s been a rough few weeks (for a lot of folks, I’m sure) and I couldn’t stop thinking about this one. To everyone who struggles with their mental health, please be kind to yourself. 

Warnings: 18+ Only. Mention of insomnia, depression, anxiety. Angst. Fluff. Attempt at a bit of humor? Soft and sweet Bucky. Established relationship. Pet names (sweetheart, doll). Non-sexual nudity & touching. Kissing. Cuddling. Brief mention of/alluding to past sexual intimacy.

---------------------------

You sit by the open window, breathing in the heavy scent of the steady rain, listening to the thunder getting closer. You should be in bed, with Bucky’s arms wrapped around you, snuggling you back to sleep. But, you can’t seem to make yourself go.

It’s been weeks of this. Insomnia. Depression. Anxiety. Every day, things feel just a bit more hopeless, like you’re barely treading water, surely to go under at any moment. Rationally, you know this will pass, as it always does, you just have to wait it out and hope you don’t drown in the meantime. 

The closer the storm gets, the more anxious you feel. As if the energy of the weather is triggering your fight or flight response. You push open the window a bit more and scoot closer to the screen, imagining yourself out in the storm, getting soaked to the bone. At least then you’d have a reason for the way your body is currently shaking.

“Sweetheart,” the tenderness of Bucky’s voice pulls you out of your thoughts and you glance over to find him watching you from the doorway. You have no idea how long he’s been standing there, wearing just his underwear and an obvious look of concern on his face.

You let out a heavy sigh and bite back the unnecessary apology, turning your attention back to the storm, a wave of guilt making your stomach flip. Bucky’s done everything he can to be patient with you, and never once has he made you feel like you’re a burden, but it’s taken an obvious toll on your relationship. The way you’ve kept him at arm’s length, scared to let him see how much you’re really struggling.

Your racing thoughts are interrupted again when Bucky comes closer, now barely a foot from the window nook where you sit. “I just wanna take care of you.” You turn your head to watch him slowly crouch down next to the seat, never once taking his eyes off you, a soft smile on his face. “It’s okay if you don’t want me to.”

You immediately shake your head, needing him to understand it’s not about that. Your mouth opens, the words on the tip of your tongue, but nothing comes out. This is how it’s been for weeks. Words desperately trying to claw their way out, only to get stuck in your throat with no escape. 

The frustration easily builds, fresh tears pricking your eyes, and you look away again, letting out a shuddering breath. Bucky should just give up on you. Leave you to wallow in self-pity and loneliness. He never will though, no matter how much you think you might deserve it.

“It’s also okay if you do want me to,” he continues, his hand slowly reaching out towards you, the tips of his fingers ghosting over the blanket wrapped around you, waiting for permission to touch you. 

Bucky sees you, understands you in ways no one ever has. Your independence is your shield, something you’ve carefully cultivated. You’ve handled everything that life’s thrown at you on your own, and relying on someone else doesn’t come easy. It has absolutely nothing to do with him, but he can still be there for you, if you’ll let him. 

“It’s okay if you need me to take care of you.”

His gentle assurance breaks your resolve, the tears currently blurring your vision spilling over your lashes, and the only thing you can do is bury your face in your hands, trying to hide from him. Bucky’s not one to give up so easily, choosing to join you, taking a spot on the edge of the seat instead of breaking the physical distance, his hand now inches from your sock-covered foot.

“You don’t have to look at me,” he promises, letting the words process before he continues, “I just want you to listen, okay? Can you do that, please?” 

All you can manage is a slight nod as you try to stifle a sniffle, your breaths uneven, willing yourself to stop the fresh tears threatening to build. 

No matter how many times you’ve been down this road - both alone and together - it never seems to get easier. Especially when Bucky’s male ego tells him he’s supposed to fix this, that it’s his job to put you back together and all you have to do is let him.

It’s a ridiculous notion, one he does his best to ignore, choosing instead to tell you, “I know it’s scary to admit you’re not okay, especially when you’re still trying to figure out what’s happening inside your own head. So, I’m not expecting you to have the energy to talk about anything tonight, I just want you to know that whatever you need from me, you have it sweetheart, even if you’re never able to tell me what’s going on.”

You try to fight through the rush of emotions, his words bringing a fresh wave of tears, your body aching for his comfort. You’re so tired of being strong, of forcing yourself to power through, pretending it’s not as bad as it seems. Bucky’s your one safe place in this chaotic world and for a fleeting moment, you have the courage to bridge the gap, the tension in your shoulders easing just a bit as you let your hand drop towards him.

He takes it for what it is, catching your hand before it can fall to his thigh and brings your palm to his lips, placing a sweet kiss right in the center. At the feel of your pulse fluttering from his simple touch, Bucky’s smile grows and he’s encouraging you closer with a soft, “co’mere,” his metal hand sliding along the outside of your arm to help guide you.

Pulling you into his lap, your soft curves molding perfectly to the harder planes of his body, Bucky wraps you up in his warm embrace, cradling your head against his shoulder. Your tears come more freely now and for a while, you just sit there, listening to the steady heartbeat of the man you’re lucky to call yours, the sound a gentle reminder that you’re not alone, regardless of what your brain tries to convince you of sometimes.

It’s not until your breath begins to even out, your sniffles slowly subsiding, that Bucky softly breaks the silence to ask you, “How do ya feel about a bath, sweetheart?”

A soft noise of protest comes out muffled against his skin, your arms tightening around his torso, content to just stay here as long as he’ll let you. Still, you can’t help asking, “is this your way of saying I smell?” It hasn’t been that long since you forced yourself to shower.

Bucky’s laughter gently shakes your body, your own smile building in return and he wastes no time in nuzzling your hair, his head dipping to dramatically sniff along your jaw and neck. “Nope,” he says matter-of-factly, meeting your gaze with a grin before repeating the action along the other side, drawing an unmistakable laugh from you. “You smell just as good as you always do,” he promises with a tender kiss right below your ear. “But, a bath might make you feel a little better.”

There are a multitude of reasons to say no - the energy it takes just to get in, the stark contrast of the cool air after getting out, having to dry off every inch of your skin before you can even think about getting into bed, just to name a few. All it takes is one look at Bucky and you’re realizing none of them matter because he already knows. 

His assurance that you won’t have to lift a finger comes quick, reminding you that he’s here to take care of you, in whatever way you need. He’ll even carry you, if you’ll let him.

To both of your surprise, it doesn’t take much for you to agree and the moment you do, Bucky seeks permission to kiss you, showing his appreciation, murmuring words of adoration against your lips. He takes a moment to savor the intimate connection, silently thanking the universe for bringing you to him, for allowing him the privilege of loving you.

He drops you off in the bedroom, resecuring the blanket still wrapped around your body, convincing you to rest in bed while he draws a bath. Once he’s gone, you actually start to doze off, snuggled with Bucky’s pillow, the distant thrum of the bathtub filling a nice break from the near constant rush of thoughts trying to occupy your mind.

When he returns, the vision of you resting peacefully is almost enough for him to break his promise to wake you. He’d happily sit watch, keep an eye on you for the rest of the night to ensure your sleep went undisturbed.

It’s the last thing you’d want though. You’d wake disoriented, feeling constricted in your clothing, worse off than you were when you fell asleep. 

With a heavy sigh, Bucky shakes his head, a regretful smile crossing his face as he reaches out to stroke your cheek with the back of his fingers. “You ready?”

His voice is barely audible, your mind not comprehending his touch until his beard is tickling your nose, his lips brushing against your forehead. Your response comes in the form of a confused grunt, your face scrunched, hands reaching up to touch him.

“The bath’s ready,” he explains, his smile evident in his tone, giving you one last lingering kiss before pulling back. “Are you ready, or do ya wanna rest a bit longer?”

It’d be easy to just stay here, let Bucky undress you and put you under the covers, your body craving rest. It won’t last though. You’ll start to get restless, toss and turn in hopes of finding a better position, all the while your mind will refuse to quiet, growing more on edge until you’re forced out of bed yet again.

A bath isn’t a cure-all, and maybe it won’t really help, but you owe it to yourself to at least try. To let yourself be vulnerable, no matter how scary it feels. 

Bucky effortlessly carries you from bed into the dimly lit bathroom, the heater already keeping the room relatively warm, ready to be adjusted when it’s time to get out. After setting you on your feet next to the tub, he gives you another reassuring smile and starts to undress you, careful not to snag your shirt on your hair.

You have to close your eyes when he kneels to remove your sweatpants, your body fighting the urge to take over and do it yourself. It’s far from the first time Bucky’s undressed you - and it certainly won’t be the last - it’s just not usually under these circumstances. 

The lingering tension starts to fade when he looks up, his obvious love for you shining through even your most persistent insecurities. Once he’s freed you of the rest of your clothes, he helps you in, the oversized tub providing more than enough space for you to sink down, the water coming up to your chest.

Bucky takes his time, giving you a minute to adjust to the heat of the water while he gathers the necessary supplies, the bath pillow already secure behind your head. All you can do is watch him, your throat tight with emotion, tears starting to prick your eyes, the nagging voice in your head trying to convince you that you don’t deserve someone like him.

Biting back the urge to tell him what’s going through your mind, you blink back the tears, your eyes cast to the ceiling for a brief moment. He gives you more time than necessary, his focus on dipping the fresh washcloth in the water, then reaching for the body wash to pour a generous amount.

Seeing him preparing to bathe you makes the moment fully come into view and a soft, incredulous laugh leaves you, “are we really doing this?” You’re not sure you’ve ever felt so naked and exposed, despite all the sinful things you’ve let this man do to you.

Bucky’s grin does wonders for your anxiety, as does his soft assurance of, “not if you don’t think it’ll help.” He tilts his head, holding your gaze, ensuring you hear his next words, “But, if it’s because you think I don’t wanna do this, or I’m not gonna enjoy every single second of it? Doll, come on, this is me.” 

His words cause another exhale of a laugh and a blush spreads across your cheeks, Bucky’s smiling growing wider, his tongue peaking out to tease along his bottom lip. 

“I’m getting to take care of you, be near you, touch you. I live for this shit,” he laughs, his brows raised to drive home his point. “I’m obsessed with you, remember? I’d literally drink your bath water.”

You barely have time to react before he’s leaning forward, having every intention to prove it to you. Your wet hands reach out just in time to push against his head and shoulder before his face gets any closer to the water, a loud laugh spilling out of you, “What- Stop, Bucky, oh my god!”

His laughter joins yours and he allows you to turn his head at the last moment, taking the opportunity to close the distance to share a kiss, Bucky smiling against your lips. You can’t resist keeping your hands on him, the water dripping down his bare torso, but he doesn’t seem to mind, his own hand reaching out to cup your jaw.

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be,” he promises, peppering kisses across your cheeks and forehead, ending with one on the tip of your nose. Once he’s sure your worries and insecurities are starting to fade, he reaches for the washcloth again, telling you, “Now, just relax and let me take care of my girl, okay?”

A playful roll of your eyes and a smile you don’t even try to hide as you tell him, “fine,” begrudgingly doing as requested. Bucky takes it in stride, his smile never faltering, happily reaching for your arm to start taking care of you in one of the few ways you’ve let him recently.

He can’t help but take advantage of the opportunity, taking his time to bathe you, massaging your muscles in the process, his movements smooth along your soap-slicked skin. By the time he’s given each limb equal attention, you’re putty in his hands and you make no objections when the washcloth dips under the water to wash your stomach and hips.

Your eyes remain closed for the most part, Bucky’s occasional glance telling him you’re enjoying this far more than you anticipated. He makes a mental note to convince you to make this a regular thing, not just when you’re going through a rough time. You deserve to be pampered every day, but he’ll settle for at least once a month.

Not missing how careful Bucky is as he moves higher, the washcloth not lingering on your breasts any longer than necessary, you finally open your eyes, blinking slowly up at him. He meets your gaze with a soft smile as he starts to wash your collarbone, the warm water calling you to sink lower, as if it might erase the clinging numbness that refuses to dissipate. 

The words tumble out of you before you can overthink them, your question catching Bucky off guard, his hand stilling on the edge of the tub. “What if I never get better?”

“Sweetheart,” Bucky murmurs with a slight shake of his head, his brow furrowing to  match the frown beginning to appear. Your mouth opens to respond, the words failing you before they can even form, wishing you could rewind time to prevent the worried look on his face.

He breaks the silence before you have to, offering you an empathetic smile as he asks, “Can I get in with you?” It’s the last thing you���re expecting as a response and it catches you off guard in such a way that your mind stops racing long enough to scoot forward, making room for him.

There’s no time to waste, Bucky quickly discarding his underwear in order to join you, the oversized tub giving him space to sit behind you, pulling you back against his chest. With his arms wrapped protectively around you, he kisses your shoulder, rubbing his beard along your skin in hopes to ground you, “This isn’t going to last forever. Eventually, something’s gonna shift and you’ll start to feel better.”

Bucky’s not wrong. What you’re experiencing right now, regardless of how long it’s lasted, won't be forever and things will go back to normal at some point. Right now isn’t what you’re referring to though. With a heavy breath, you pull your knees up, letting the air hit your skin, goosebumps threatening to spread. “But that never lasts either.”

He can hear the emotion in your voice, the tears starting to build again, and it makes his chest ache, wishing he could ease your pain. “Maybe not,” he agrees, keeping his tone gentle, “but that’s okay. It’s all part of being human, sweetheart. We have good days, and we have bad days, and no, I’m not keeping score.”

An exhale of a laugh leaves you at the same time a tear escapes your lashes, causing you to automatically wipe it away, your wet hand leaving several drops of water in its place. Bucky gives you the space to collect yourself, using the opportunity to grab the washcloth and bodywash again, determined to complete his mission of bathing you.

You welcome the distraction, leaning forward to give him better access, his fingers soon working out the tension in your back. Your delicate mental state leaves you vulnerable, Bucky’s touch sending you further down the rabbit hole of negative thoughts, the once receding emotions returning tenfold, leaving you crying.

“You deserve better than this.”

“Hey,” Bucky soothes, gathering you in his arms to pull you flush against his body, your weight welcome on his lap, your face pressed against his neck, tears mixing with the water. “There is no one out there better for me than you,” he promises. “You’re it for me. You and your gorgeous mind and insanely hot body, and yes - all your ‘issues’,” he grins, kissing your temple.

There’s nothing you can do except sigh, your breath shuddering out of you, your hand pressed against his chest, drawing comfort from the strong beat of his heart. What he’s saying is starting to break through, reminding you what it’s like when things don’t feel so heavy. How easy it is to be loved by him when you’re not so scared of being a burden.

“I just want you to be happy,” you manage to whisper, working past the emotions trying to overwhelm you again.

“Good,” Bucky’s quick to respond, his fingers on your chin tilting your face up to meet his warm gaze. “‘Cause that’s exactly how you make me feel.” He can’t help but shake his head at you, his smile growing, as if you don’t realize how ridiculous you’re being, “Every day you make me feel like the luckiest guy in the world. Nothing is ever going to change that. Got it?”

Another heavy breath, and a tear that Bucky casually wipes away, but this time it’s accompanied by a twitch of a smile, the waves of anxiety starting to recede. “Got it,” you whisper, meeting him halfway for a kiss, solidifying your devotion to each other, your promise to work as a team to get through whatever comes, without pushing the other too far out of your comfort zone.

It’ll take time, and it won’t be perfect, but at least you’ll have the rest of your lives to keep trying.

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Comments and reblogs very much appreciated!! 🩶

Main Masterlist

[respectthepetty]

Joke's (Sad) Face

This post is about Joke's face.

But it's not about his actual face.

It's about his Joker face.

While Joke was surrounded by Jack's blue at the hospital, I just couldn't stop thinking about how pretty War is.

Which is why it's so tragic that his character, Joke, spends so much time being sad.

He has been sad since the very beginning and has remained in this state throughout the series.

Which is probably why he created the red Joker moniker.

A joker is a trickster. A joker is similar to a jester. A joker should be happy.

But Joke is anything but happy and his sadness began when he was child who couldn't cope with academic stress, so he began to use the sad face.

Then a kid he never met fixed his frown and turned it upside down. Jack made him smile.

And years later, at a bar late at night, that kid would make Joke smile again.

By simply sitting with him.

Joke was sad about his life, and Jack told him that it was okay.

Then he told him to smile.

Because like I believe, War Joke is so beautiful when he smiles.

Jack, with his blue (spray bottle), has been wiping Joke's sadness away for years, even without knowing it.

And as Joke returned to his childhood home to all the sticky notes marked with red sad faces, he believed he would never be as happy as he was with Jack again.

The time Joke spends with Jack is the happiest of his life because Jack makes Joke happy, which is why Joke got the smiley face tattoo.

Because Jack was a truly happy kid when they first met, and gave that happiness to Joke.

But things change.

Joke's other tattoo is of a dual smiling face and sad face, and when Joke approached Jack after five years, he said he wanted to bring back the old Jack. After that encounter, Jack asked his grandmother if he had changed to which she responded that he couldn't stay a kid forever.

Jack let Joke escape in the fashion event. Jack was blamed for the necklace being stolen, yet showed up to the hotel to help Joke. Jack put himself in the way during the fight to keep Joke safe. Jack always turns the worst situations around and has sacrificed parts of himself as a result.

So Jack is darker now. He is no longer blue. He is black. He can't be Joke's source of happiness when he is struggling to find the good in life himself, so while Joke is in the hospital surrounded by Jack's blue with family and friends, Jack sits alone wearing a red shirt with one tiny lamp to give him warmth.

Jack has his grandmother, who blends both his and Joke's colors, but she's all Jack has ever had, and now she cares for Joke just as much as she loves Jack.

And this is a point Aran made in the very beginning and Hope repeated this episode — Jack, just like Save, doesn't really much. He doesn't have options. Joke does. Jack had to do what he had to do to survive and keep his grandmother safe, but Joke gets to return home to a family and a room that has been kept spotless. Jack doesn't. Well, not if he doesn't fight for it.

And that's what hurts. Jack has to fight for everything. So even though Joke has done a lot for Jack, Jack has done just as much for Joke. He gave Joke a place to stay, food to eat, friends, family, and happiness when Joke had nothing to give and nowhere to go. Jack himself has nothing, yet still gave Joke everything he has had to fight for, including his limited happiness and even the last bits of his color.

So it's important that the episode showed Joke not only giving Jack his color, but also his happiness. Joke has finally turned his sad face into a happy face, on his own.

Joke is depressed, and for so long, because of that, he believed that he couldn't be a source of happiness. Yet on this journey, he has brought happiness to his friends, grandma, and countless people along the way, so here he is, not only giving his color to Toi Ting and Jack, but also his happiness.

Jack has never wanted to see Joke's sad face, which is why he gave Joke his happiness.

And now that Joke is realizing that he is happiness, hopefully Jack never will.

But they'll have to fight for it first.

[burningcheese-merchant]

Hi, you're the first person on Tumblr I ever asked (still don't know how it works)

But how does Nutmeg Tiger feel about the kids in your Beast Redemption canon? Golden Cheese? Burning Spice and how he changed so much?

My "actually sitting down and answering asks" bender continues lol.

Nutmeg Tiger was quite shocked and confused when she noticed her master start to change. She's been fed the same stories about him all her life, had the same thoughts and expectations drilled into her skull as all the other Wild Spices. They favor the strong. Burning Spice favors the strong. Their raison d'être is power, battle, and bloodshed, and anyone who stands in their master's way must be destroyed, in keeping with the wanton destruction Burning Spice always craved.

But... Golden Cheese. That woman... That bird. Nutmeg was aware of her master's fixation on her from the get-go (it creeped her out a lot sometimes, but she always held her tongue), and obeyed when he demanded the bird be brought to him. She hated Golden Cheese almost by instinct, for any enemy of her master was an enemy of hers. She was outraged whenever Golden insulted him, and tried to escape his clutches, and when she actually defeated him (now THAT was a shock. She always thought her master was invincible. How could this be?). But she stood by and continued obeying his commands, even after that illusion she'd had of him being unstoppable was shattered. It was all she could do, in all honesty, for she never knew anything else.

But Burning Spice kept going after her. First to fight - but not even for the Soul Jam, just for fun. When Nutmeg tried to question this, Spice shut her down with prejudice and without explaining himself. She never asked again after that; she only had one head, she couldn't afford to lose it... And regardless, he was her master, and she cannot and must not question him.

...But then he started doing more than just fighting Golden Cheese. He started just... talking to her. Spending time with her. His infatuation with her was ever-present, but Nutmeg saw it slowly evolve from entirely selfish and deranged (even Nutmeg thought he was a psycho lol) to more tempered, healthy and genuine. Furthermore, Spice himself began to... calm down, for lack of a better term. He became more somber. More subdued. He seemed lost in thought often, when he was back home. His words and tone of voice began to lose some of their bite. He didn't want to go on hunts or destroy things as much anymore. If Nutmeg Tiger had it in her to say it - to anyone at all, including to herself - Spice almost seemed... depressed.

And it was Golden Cheese's fault, Nutmeg Tiger was certain. She was doing something to her master. In addition to stealing his power AND his heart, she has stolen his spirit - and for this, Nutmeg Tiger only hated her more. Greedy, haughty, conniving bird. If only Burning Spice had succeeded in killing her when he had the chance (she does not know or understand that he never wanted this in the first place; if Golden died, who would entertain him?)...

Worse still was when her master started bringing her there. He started bringing Golden Cheese back to Beast-Yeast, back to the Spice Ridge, to visit the Wild Spices. What- what even- what is this? What nonsense is this? He's bringing their sworn nemesis around like it's normal! Like he's bringing his girlfriend home to his family! (Which unironically is what he's doing lol that sly dog) And the other spices are OKAY WITH THIS! THEY ENJOY SEEING HER! THEY WARM UP TO HER AND LAY DOWN THEIR ARMS ALMOST INSTANTLY! Fools! Weaklings! Cowards, all of them! Is she the only one with any backbone left?! Is she the only one who sees and remembers the bird's treachery?!

Of COURSE Nutmeg Tiger is angry when she actually realizes that Burning Spice has well and truly fallen in love with Golden Cheese - and that Golden Cheese has fallen for him in turn, and thus they'd begun a relationship. She can't really say she's shocked, not anymore (probably not back then, either, her master was down BAD), but she certainly is appalled. In fact, Nutmeg almost feels... betrayed. All of that time and hard work, the blood and sweat and tears, spent on trying to follow HIS orders. LIVES were lost in the pursuit of this thief! And he just... shrugs it off? Shoves them all aside so he can pretend he's a good person and walk off into the sunset holding hands with their enemy? It's honestly insulting. Hurtful, even. The Wild Spices were fools, and now Burning Spice was the king of fools.

She remains resistant to everything for a very long time. Nutmeg Tiger is nothing, absolutely nothing at all, if not principled (read: stubborn). She does not accept her master's change of heart. She is not happy like the other Wild Spices are when he stops mistreating them and actually starts behaving like a proper king/leader. She only engages with Golden Cheese and her entourage (they start coming around too, and she hates it and them, that hooded servant that reeks of smoke most of all) to snap and snarl at them. She does not approve of Spice's relationship with Golden, even if he's genuinely happy - the sort of happiness she's never seen him express before. The kind brought by something light and warm, not the starved, manic, ephemeral glee that came with the carving of flesh and bone by his axe. It's anathema to everything she's ever known. It's an attack on her people, her way of life, HER. Perhaps everyone else has bent the knee to Golden Cheese, but she won't. Even if she's the last one on Earthbread who doesn't.

Except... She ends up bending the knee, too. Last one in line, but even so. When you're forced to hang around people all the time, it starts to reflect on you in some way. Especially if those people refuse to leave you alone, and seem to make an honest effort to speak to you and interact with you and get to know you. Especially that damn bird. Never any anger or malice on her face or in her voice... Did she not remember their rivalry? The pain they inflicted on one another? How can she still treat Nutmeg this way? Why is she being nice to her?

...Nutmeg Tiger never forgot that day. That moment where Golden Cheese condemned Burning Spice for ignoring Nutmeg while she was injured. They didn't even know each other. They were at war. Nutmeg was trying to hurt her. And yet, Golden still spoke up. She still stood up for her. Nutmeg Tiger has never known real kindness, be it giving any to others or receiving it... And there was someone giving her some, even if she herself could argue that it was undeserved. Golden had already driven a nail into Nutmeg's coffin by doing that... And all these visits from her, every attempt at conversation and fun and honest friendship, was just another nail. They stung, but Nutmeg was no stranger to pain... Only this pain kept building until not even she could endure it anymore.

Thus, slowly but surely, with the help and kindness of Golden Cheese and those beside her, Nutmeg Tiger, too, learned to change. Like Spice, she ended up confused. Depressed. She had a crisis of conscience and identity that took a long time to resolve. But when she did, she came out of it all the better, finally realizing the error of her ways and joining everyone else in the light. Perhaps she cannot undo her past actions - none of them can - but forward is the only way one can go regardless. And now, she finally wants to, and there are people there willing to help her along. To say no would be another wrongdoing.

She's happy at Spice and Golden's wedding. She welcomes the unification of their peoples. She accepts Golden Cheese and the others as friends (how strange it still is, to have "friends"...). She proudly serves her master still - both masters now.

And she loves the children like her own. She's the grumpy aunt that takes things too seriously and has a temper, but they still adore her (and vice versa). She helps train them (it is now her life's mission to ensure they become the greatest warriors to ever live lol). She'll carry them around on her back if they ask. She likes when they spend time in the nutmeg tribe. They are Wild Spices just like the rest of them. (She wasn't there when Pepper Jack was born, regrettably; she made it to the GCK a few days later. But she WAS there when Matar Paneer was born. Now THAT was a crazy day lol)

So yeah, there you have it. Nutmeg Tiger gets redeemed, too. Slower than Burning Spice (which is fundamentally absurd lol), but even so. She comes around to everything eventually.

And maybe she starts paying closer attention to "that servant who reeks of smoke"...

[will80sbyers]

Can't kill Joyce or El because Hopper just talked about himself being the curse and was proven wrong, killing them would make that whole storyline complete nonsense, can't kill Hopper for the same reason plus he already fake died, can't kill Will because he already died and the whole show would not be watchable anymore since the whole point of season 1 and 2 was to save him specifically, can't kill Mike because no other happy ending of the mains would be credible if Mike died, he's the heart so if he dies they all do, can't kill El because she has been fighting for her freedom and to find her family as a character since season 1 so she deserves the happy ending and pay off after all she suffered, killing Lucas would be simply nonsensical and him and Max have to have their date pay off, can't kill Max because of the same reason and also because she already died and killing the girl with explicit suicidal thoughts would be extremely fucked up in this kind of story that's supposed to be about love and hope and family, they can kill Dustin but it would also be extremely cruel especially after making him depressed about Eddie and in general I just don't see a good enough reason to kill any of the kids, killing Steve is just plain boring and repetitive... I guess they could do that but I feel like they are better writers than that, if they kill Robin I kill them because she's the only lesbian character - but in general they wouldn't have introduced Vickie if they wanted her or Vickie to die in the finale or at least I don't think so... and for the rest people already know how I feel lol

[brazenautomaton]

I'm no subject mattter expert but it looks that way to me from the superficial sources I have

most of the union "battles" appear to have both failed, and damaged support in the future. the unionized workers declare a strike for higher wages, the company doesn't fold right away, the union has no leverage and no backup plan and absolutely no incentive to make the owners want to re-hire them, they start breaking shit and attacking people, the cops or national guard or general hired goons are called in, there's gunfights, there's some "martyrs for the labor movement", and usually the union responsible loses so much support that it ceases to exist.

this was not every conflict but this looks like every conflict where the unions got violent. when they didn't, it was because the owners just got so fucking butthurt at the concept of a strike that they or their supporters just started shooting strikers before anything happened (or it was because the strike ended quickly). if the owners shot first, then the union support went way up.

and like this isn't even "oh the evil capitalists twist the narrative to say the laborers started the violence by defending themselves," since the things they were doing were not self-defence, they were destroying industrial equipment and getting violent with anyone who wasn't in the union. it's really funny reading wiki entries with an obvious bias and how they use the same kind of "exculpatory tense" that newspapers use when writing about a cop that shot someone. the Morewood Massacre page says the methods used were "strikes, protests, demonstrations," and then near the end of the article, admits "In March 1891, violence erupted as striking miners, some facing eviction and economic hardship, began targeting company facilities and replacement workers." it's very important that the violence merely erupted in the passive tense of its own accord, and you know that there was a very good excuse for these guys to go blowing shit up and attacking people.

of the Pullman strike, wiki says "On June 29, 1894, Debs hosted a peaceful meeting to rally support for the strike from railroad workers at Blue Island, Illinois. Afterward, groups within the crowd became enraged and set fire to nearby buildings and derailed a locomotive." the meeting was peaceful! it was just afterwards that some groups started burning shit down and flipping trains.

of the 1877 St. Louis general strike, a page that is part of the Wiki portal on socialism, it says "What began as the peaceful actions of organized labor attracted the masses of discontented and unemployed workers spawned by the depression, along with others who took opportunistic advantage of the chaos. In total, an estimated 100,000 workers participated nationwide." it was very peaceful guys organized labor is very peaceful it was someone else taking advantage of the chaos

the lesson of this is not that labor unions are evil (they are organizations subject to incentives like any other, not sources of moral justification), the lesson is when you go on strike you need some leverage to make the employer want to get you back. because if you don't have that leverage, your only option is to try and resort to violence, and you are starting a fight that in the long term you are not going to win.

seeing a communist angrily assert that of course Coca-Cola had death squads murder union organizers! is now making me doubt that it even happened, when I used to think it was true without thinking much about it

not because "everything a communist says is the opposite of the truth" but because the obvious undeniable evidence that had no other explanation he pointed to was that 24 "union organizers" died... over the course of 15 years.

if the case against Coke was "24 people who each attempted to be the individual leader of a labor union for one of your plants got murdered" then that would be incredibly suspicious, since there's no way that isn't "every single person who tried that." but there's also no way there's 24 people who tried that. if the case is "24 people, each of whom was involved in some fashion with a unionization attempt, were murdered over the course of 15 years, in Colombia and Guatemala, in the 80s and 90s," no that actually is not suspicious because there was a looooot of murdering by a lot of paramilitary death squads going on there for political and tactical reasons, and then the question of "was the coca-cola company actually involved or just the bottling plants it sold licenses to but did not directly command?"

but I can't actually find much information on this, just "everyone knows about the death squads working for coca cola" and details of one specific suit regarding the deaths of 3 people that was dismissed due to lack of evidence that coca-cola in the US was involved. I'm not gonn be all "this never happened it's commie propaganda" since I still find it plausible but I'd like to find more actual info about it

[silvabacca]

Spoilers for Dandadan ep 7

(Maybe someone already wrote about it, but idc I needed this, treat this as my coping mechanism)

How to accomplish a masterpiece? This word is used too often today, but it perfectly describes a scene we see in ep 7, I’m talking about a backstory of yokai woman.

In the whole scene there are a few words, but that’s enough, enough to tell the story. We get a beautiful combination of images accompanied by an amazing music. Every frame is vividly showing an emotion a scene is saying, for example before the woman opens a door to, as we can guess her apartment, everything is gray, dark and depressing. It’s depicting her life outside, her feelings when she’s not home, but as soon as she opens a door there is a bright beam of light and a first sound that isn’t a rain. We see a little girl, grinning from ear to ear and welcoming her mother home, it’s the first time we see this woman smile. This shows, in the most simple way, how important her daughter is to her, how the moments they share together are motivating her to keep trying.

We then see how her everyday life is going, from multiple jobs to spending time with the little girl. It’s nothing extraordinary, just a normal life. It’s hard, no doubt, we can tell that she is struggling, facing problems, fighting for their happiness, but that’s ok, because she has hope, she has her light.

The music is adding a great part to the story, it’s as if it’s holding our hand in a beautiful but difficult dance, it’s leading us, the characters and the story across the ballroom…

Then everything stops. The music, that was reflecting the feeling of their happiness, the delicacy of each frame, the warm and welcoming colors. It all disappears in a blink of an eye. The only sound that intensifies is rain, that same rain we heard at the beginning of her story and screams of her daughter.

The work of a camera in this sequence adds to the feeling of desperation. As if we were running with the mother or more like as if we were the mother, chasing after kidnappers that took our daughter. It’s chaotic, messy, foggy, not clear and scary. The panting, heavy breathing hits like a truck, everything combined is a true depiction of everything that any mother in her place would feel and do. As the screen stops at the blood in water and slowly goes dark, it than dramatically changes. There’s no darkness, no visible blood, no rain, but stars.

The night sky with a city view in a distance is overwhelming. It’s big, bright and breathtaking. This change from blurry, gray and messy sequence to this calm, quiet and bright view is another depiction of emotions. A couple of minutes earlier it was pure desperation and rage, now it’s…nothing. One big nothingness. There is a light, but it’s not for her, stars shine on the sky, but they are not as warm as the one she used to see. It’s all so pretty, but it’s also cold, there is not a single warm color, the whole palette is blue, purple and white.

Now…the dance. From what was shown earlier it seemed like the woman was sharing her passion for dancing with her daughter. Her posture, exercises and movement suggested that she knew how to dance or at least she had some acrobatic skills. But we didn’t see her dance, not until now. The music is again playing, the piece we heard earlier is now a mer memory of their time together. The woman stands on her toes and it begins. The most beautiful, well done, animated perfectly to the smallest detail dance scene. Not just the move, the way the dress flows, but also the angles, the camera movement and all of this on a peaceful city night sky. You know what is going to happen and you can’t prevent it from happening, but you can’t stop looking, you can’t take your eyes off of her, because it’s too stunning. And the final jump as the background changes perspective behind her and…the fall.

She lost everything that kept her alive, that kept her trying. Her little light, her little girl, her whole world.

[skyartworkzzz]

I came back to promp another lore ramble

Also could we get a status update on the fic? I really want to see nari go back in time for the lamb

YIPPEEEEEEEEE love me lore ramble!

FIRST AND FOREMOST, OFC!! Heres a tiny lil update of the fic so far! I finally got back to writing it and am just struggling to find out what happens next.......but I promise its in the works! <3

NOW onto the ramble! Yesterday I went a bit ham on my Creepypasta reimagination, so thats what we will be talking about today! Specifically centered around Jeff the Killer CUZ IM THAT PREDICTABLE OKAY-

Anyways! Lore under the cut <3 tw for violence and gore!!

Jeff The Killer:

My Jeff is around his 35 years old and is the younger brother of Liu, who's only 1-2 years older and works as an architect

The brothers share the same apartment, Jeff decided to move in with Liu after living with their parents for a while. Hes currently trying to amount enough money in order to move somewhere of his own

Jeff suffers from depression and has psychotic episodes from time to time, so he has to take meds. Even after he became a killer, he still steals the needed medication to keep his mental exhaustion in check

From time to time, their lower-floor neighbor Ms. Harper calls Jeff to fix her old sink. Everytime Jeff goes over, her son pesters him for fun, which is why Jeff hates him

One day, both Jeff and Liu are invited to the bday of Ms. Harper's son, which was being held at his aunt's house. While in the party, her kitchen sink floods and so she asks Jeff to fix it. While doing so, Ms. Harper's kid accidentally throws chemicals on Jeff's face after trying to prank him with his friends

Jeff is then driven to the hospital by Liu, but they suffer a car crash, which makes Jeff's face melt down and turn pale white. Liu suffered the major damages and had to go through surgeries to put his organs back in place

When Jeff wakes up and sees the damage that was done, he suffers a mental breakdown which leads him to murder Ms. Harper's son. Once the deed was done, he disappeared and started his serial killing career

Jeff cut his lips into a smile specifically to terrify Ms. Harper's son, as if guilting him bout thinking what he did was funny

Before going off the radar, Jeff visited Liu one last time without others knowing, saying he didnt blame his brother for what had happened. Liu, although half-conscious, was able to hear Jeff telling him to go back to sleep

Homicidal Liu:

HONESTLY my Liu doesnt have much of "homicidal" to him LMAO

After the events that led both him and Jeff into the hospital, Liu went through surgeries to recover and was in a coma for a couple of days, which was the time it took for Jeff to start his killer life

When Liu woke up and learned that his brother had disappeared, he quickly volunteered to help and search for him, until finally discovering he was a murderer

Convinced to bring him back to his senses, Liu begged to be part of the police operation to capture Jeff, after proving he could be of use for knowing how his brother worked. And so, he was teamed up with a detective called Jane, who was in charge of arresting Jeff

After much investigation and searching, Liu and Jane finally came face to face with the killer, but came to a fight which led Jeff to carving a smile on Liu's face too and almost ripping his eyelids off like his own. Liu was led back to the hospital after this and received stitches

Seeing as they were lacking experience to capture Jeff, both the detectives accepted to undergo a special training. However, due to Liu's physical state, he wasn't able to finish it and decided to remain on the more schemeful side of the operation rather than direct combat

Given his stitches on his mouth and the horrible wounds his brother left on him, Liu constantly uses a mask and clothes that cover most of his body

Jane the Killer:

Jane works as a detective for the police, she is happily married to a woman named Mary and both live in a spacious, fancy apartment

Her parents were kindhearted and lived with her little sister, Jessie, in a simple house around the quieter parts of the city

Being one of the best agents and praised by the government, Jane was tasked with tracking down Jeff and bringing him to justice. It was during this search that Liu came into contact with her, after learning she was in charge of the operation

Throughout the times they spent together trying to capture Jeff, the killer murdered Jane's parents as a warning for her to leave him alone. But understandbly, that only made her more convinced to seize him with a new goal in mind: kill Jeff

When Liu and Jane received the special traning, Liu wasnt able to participate due to his condition, but Jane carried out until the last step. She was injected with Liquid Hate and gained her superpowers, with the side-effects being her skin turning pale and her eyes and hair black

After the "training" was done, Jane came closer and closer to finally capturing Jeff, but with an unexpected drawback: she was now wanted by the police for committing crimes she couldnt remember doing. Given the new scenario, the detective started working as an underworld punisher

She still searches for Jeff and stays in touch with Liu, now secretly since she is also being hunted down. They both still work as partners from time to time trying to find his brother

Lil extras!

After her parents were killed, Jessie moved in with Jane and Mary, being a survivor of Jeff's wrath luckily for not being home that day

Liu does not know Jane intends to kill Jeff, and she will never tell him, for she knows he will try to stop her

The Liquid Hate project was actually a Proxy experiment, organized by one of Slenderman's Agents who was also the scientist in charge of the special training Jane and Liu received. Jane became a Sleeper thanks to said experiment, with homicidal tendencies she is luckily able to channel to wanted criminals

That is all for now! Theres a whole lot more I havent said here cuz omfg thats too long already

MAYBE ONE DAY ILL BE able to write my own fanfictions about these, who knows

Anyways! Bless chu for the curiosity <3

[animalistic0]

Okay…okay! I have so much to say and I need to get everything that I am feeling and thinking out because OMG

Pregnancy reveal/post by Sarah and John B?!? OMG YESSSSS. Also Pope in the comments being like; “this is why he keeps canceling boys night.” I can’t with them. I love them all, love all the little details and all the little dynamics.

POPE FINALLY GETTING ON COOKING WITH CLEO🥳🗣️🥳🗣️ yesssss it’s happening. I was with my mans waiting for this. Also FOUR YEARS?!? Cleo wrong for that lmao and then dedicating it to the reader. I love our wife fr. She’s the best. Another detail I love is how close we are to Cleo and Pope. Love our besties, love our husband and wife💙🩵🫶 Also John B and Cleo in the comments, fucking dead. Him not knowing the difference between a salt and pepper shaker. Brother what? Cleo please never but please do bring him in the kitchen 😂 a beautiful disaster, waiting to happen.

Readers post about seasonal depression…too real 😂 and all her little comments right after I can’t. Had me laughing harder and harder because it was so relatable. Then JJ coming to save the day….STAWP😍

The instagram post. Calling JJ our knight in shining armor 😩 him flirting in the comments with us. Also RAFE liking the post?!? I saw that. I saw that shit. I don’t know who to like more or who I’m rooting for. At this point neither, I can’t choose. I WANT BOTH. “Both. Both is good.”

Readers tweets about the Cooking with Cleo video is FANTASTIC. Let’s be honest though, all three of us know we ALREADY married. Lmao. We all together, legit love the friendship with Pope and Cleo so much I can’t get enough and can’t express it enough. Pope saying fake news when we say he loves us, that man just can’t admit or say I love you. But it’s okay, he’s our bestie and our wife’s husband.

READERS TEXTS WITH RAFE. don’t get me started….Im started. Him so clearly nervous and scared to scare us off😭 and then us just fucking diving right in. The begging on the knees, I know he’s definitely gonna take that and RUN WITH IT. And I can’t wait. I can’t wait to see what he does with that. The whole conversation had be giggling and kicking my feet.

JJ AND THE READERS😮‍💨🤭 now that DELIVERED!!!! He’s so down bad, omg and I love it. I love him. LIKE I SAID. BOTH. You can’t make us chose, you can’t make reader chose. Damn😭 his; “breathing near you is the highlight of my day. I don’t ever really care about what we are doing.” LIKE OMG, this is so beautiful and sweet and this had me blushing and giggling and kicking my feet. Then him outing himself☠️ 13yrs damn poor man, and that’s a good question about his game 😂 that or we just blind asf.

THE SOS POST; the last post. This post. This Post. THIS. WAS. THE. POST. I was cackling so loud, giggling, everything!!!!! I reread it a million times because it was just beautiful. I have said it and I’ll say it again and forever and forever. POPE AND CLEO ARE THE BEST. I LOVE OUR BESTIES, OUR WIFEY AND HUSBAND. In actuality forget JJ and Rafe. GIVE ME CLEO AND POPE🙏 No, but Cleo springing over and leaving Pope in the dust is so funny I can’t. And poor Pope being so confused until Cleo is like, “Piping tea babe.” AND THEN HIS GIF/MEME OF RUNNING??? Absolutely dead, had me cackling even louder. I can’t explain how much I love Pope and Cleo, especially in this and as our besties. I can’t get over this one, legit my favorite (slide? Picture? Story post? Idk) it’s legit my favorite and was absolutely amazing.

Thank you for not only sharing this but creating this. It’s so amazing, and such a great and entertaining story. I love all the small little details you add to every part and all the little side stories and relationships that are involved in this. For example; John B jumping in the fight and helping defend not only his team but the reader. Topper seemingly always there and confused when reader and Rafe interact 😂 Rafe really needs to update this man on what’s happening fr 😂 it’s all just beautiful. Also Rafe and JJ getting along just for reader and everyone literally being like, okay readerrrrr we see you and your power. My point is this is stunning and I’m in love with it so much. Thank you 🫶💙🥰

Kildare University- Sophomore Year: 8

Synopsis: A Social Media AU in which you find yourself at Kildare University along with your friends. Starting over at a new school shouldn't be difficult. Well, except for the fact that your ex-boyfriend is the quarterback, and you are the drum major. Add in a little bit of drama, a lot of friendship, an ex who can't seem to let you go, and a best friend who has been in love with you since you were kids and well? Welcome to KU!

Pairings: Past!Rafe x Reader, JJ x Reader, Rafe x Reader

Masterlist

Taglist:

@akobx @onelonelybitch @the-universe-and-karma @beeskisses @frankoceanluvr11 @ivy-34 @rafecameronsloverrrrr @k-k0129 @asyouwish-fromcabin3 @xoxo-ada @aariahnaa @strawberryforks @urbrunettebombshell @whatisoutside @spenceatiny18

[reithwinwanderer]

My thoughts after finishing The Well of Ascension!!!

Most obviously: what on earth did Vin just release… my current theory (founded on not much) is that it maybe has something to do with the “God” who was talking to Zane, only because it told Zane that he shouldn’t kill her. Because it needed her to go to the Well??? Because it was the one guiding her there??? Who knows. But that leads me onto my second point ->

Zane is some kind of steel-inquisitor without the eye spikes? He has the spike in his chest which was then brought up many times throughout the rest of the book - how removing that spike is the only way to kill one of them. So Zane’s still kicking about somewhere.

I still have no theories about what Vin’s earring is doing to her. I’m so desperate to find out I neeeed answers. Like honestly that is the thing I want to find out the most. Any mention of it gets me so excited

Sazed’s newfound hopelessness is extremely depressing. The character whose life work was in giving others hope loses all hope??? Might as well just kill me now.

Oh yeah, Marsh. What are the steel inquisitors up to. He seemed to be not very in control of himself whilst fighting Sazed to stop him from stopping Vin. So it’s like the steel inquisitors want the being in the Well to be released right? Hmm.

That is everything that’s stood out to me most! I have more thoughts but honestly my brain is fried, those last 30 or so pages were soooo tense.

[evinleighfantasy]

A note about Transgender Day of Rememberance

Some of you might know every year I try to say something about this day because it’s always been important to me. But to be completely honest, this year I’ve been struggling to come up with the right words...

I’ve been feeling hopeless some days; that the statistics for this day keep rising as we lose more friends and family. Depressed, seeing the way the world is now and the direction it seems to be going. And angry at the politics that keep driving that number up year after year as people in our queer community continue to lose trust that things will be okay.

So while I’m here acknowledge this day of Rememberance and who we’ve lost. I also want to acknowledge all the friends I’ve made in this community. It makes me hopeful to have this space to be a part of. And I’m proud to know all of you.

Being resilient at this point in time and history isn’t easy or forgiving right now. But seeing you all be your authentic and resilient selves gives me confidence that our community won’t just sit down and take the bad that might come our way.

All that being said I really just wanted to say thank you for being here. Stay safe and look out for each other. Check in with your friends today, see how they’re really doing, and keep up the good fight.

With love,

EV

https://glaad.org/tdor/

https://tdor.translivesmatter.info

[shortqueershakespeare]

My brain is full of bees and I know the solution is not to set the whole thing on fire but by god would it be easier

[crossdressingdeath]

Not going to lie, seeing people act like the South is Totally Destroyed Forever Because Blight and Bioware are Bad Writers for not going into the aftermath after beating Solas and Elgar'nan is equally hilarious to me. Presumably DAV takes place over around the same length of time as the other non-time-skipping games (so a year), and the assault on the South doesn't start immediately. Guys, we know what happens when a place is full of Blight for a year. It happened in literally the first game. The damage done by the fighting will be more extensive here and the death toll significantly higher just due to the scale, the aftermath will take a lot of time and effort (and Bioware probably didn't go into it for what I assume is the same reason they don't talk about the death toll and cleanup in any detail after DAO or DAI, namely that that's a wildly depressing note to end the game on), but in terms of specifically long-term damage due to Blight... uh, if it was that bad Ferelden wouldn't exist anymore. Parts of the Anderfels are still blighted now after the First and Second Blights hit them and lasted 192 and 90 years respectively, the attack on the South in DAV is significantly shorter and that's not even touching on how we're repeatedly told throughout the Wardens' quest line that the Blight is changing and things are coming back from it in a way no one thought was possible (see the thing with the flowers in Hossberg and also Neve/Bellara apparently being healed or at least recovering a good deal of the damage after Elgar'nan's defeat). We also don't actually know how bad the damage is to begin with; Quiz loses contact with large areas, but as far as I'm aware it's never made clear whether that's because those areas were completely obliterated or just because the situation got bad enough to cut them off from any contact (which we know can happen in Blights without the cut off area being destroyed; see Kal-Sharok, which managed reasonably fine for nearly a millennium after being cut off from all communication with Orzammar). The South is going to be fine once it's had time to rebuild and recover. At least as fine as Ferelden was post-Blight or most of Thedas was after tears in the Fade opened up and spat out demons everywhere for a year (plus however long it took Quiz to close all the more distant ones). Calm down.

It's genuinely kind of hilarious to me seeing people whine about how the blight doesn't seem to be hurting the Veilguard even though it's supposed to be super dangerous like that makes DAV uniquely bad when Hawke and Quiz are swanning around the Deep Roads and jumping up and down on red lyrium with zero ill effects and even in DAO your non-Warden companions can get coated in darkspawn blood and be fine. Guys, it's a gameplay thing so your party doesn't die of exposure to stuff in the game's environment. Calm your tits.

[ghosted-jazz]

Species Swap AU! Retired couple gets a fairy godchild to help repair their relationship

[mkzmerryfriend]

*cracks knuckles* we know Tyler isn’t the original Clancy right? Y’all caught that? Clancy’s bishop was Keons, Tyler’s is Nico, and now “Clancy” is Tyler. Because “scaled and icy” is an anagram for “Clancy is dead” and that album was the one where dema was using Tyler’s popularity for their own purposes. Clancy failed to stop the cycle on his own, and despite already being used as a figurehead for dema, Tyler decided to take up the role of “Clancy” in the wake of what seemed like a total collapse of the Banditos. Their leader had been taken out, and now they had no one to organize them.

But Tyler taking on the name Clancy isn’t him taking on the role of leader or even organizer. He is showing us (the Banditos) that we all can be our own inspiration, we don’t need a figure to follow, we don’t need a leader to lead us. We can do this, fight dema, ourselves.

Y’all got that, right?