#I just can’t help but think that Kaine would be the kind of guy where you’d just be hanging out and he’d turn to you

[scarletspider2the2ndpower]

Ben Reilly: Scarlet Spider (Vol. 1/2017), #4.

Writer: Peter David; Penciler: Mark Bagely; Inkers: John Dell and Andrew Hennessy; Colorist: Jason Keith; Letterer: Joe Caramagna

[something-very-special]

Impressions

I know I’m way behind on progression through Replicant (insofar as anybody can be ‘way behind’ in the sense of playing a video game for personal entertainment), buuuut I figured I’d share a few thoughts.

Presently I’m doing sidequest mop-up post-Barren Temple, for reference:

So just to get this overall out of the way, I am legitimately fascinated by the differences between NIER and Replicant. This is something I picked up on when I played RepliCant to grab footage for my LP, but given my extremely limited understanding of Japanese all I could get was the tone between characters and to my unpracticed ear they sounded pretty different. I always assumed that Weiss was somehow even more condescending to Brother and hah hah, wow. Even kind of expecting the dialogue and delivery differences I was not prepared for some of the dialogue and delivery differences. Weiss just straight-up insulting BroNier on the regular, not even doing sarcastic eye-rolls like he does with Papa. I don’t remember the exact line that set me off but somewhere in the Barren Temple I was just laughing my ass off at how much of a dick Weiss is.

Thought the ‘miracles’ conversation in the Junk Heap was interesting, too. I remember Papa Nier telling Weiss to stuff it because ‘those kids need a miracle’ and Weiss kind of backs down-- obviously doesn’t believe it, but he knows better than to push. And Brother tries but Weiss is just not having this optimism bullshit. Little things, but the tenor of the relationship is definitely different.

One of the more interesting aspects early on is the way the Lunar Tear is treated. Obviously I don’t know if this was part of the original game or a script adjustment, but Brother talking about the Tear as a source of money as opposed to Father saying it can grant wishes was interesting. Maybe it was to justify that Kaine just has a whole necklace of the damn things and therefore it’s rare but not literally magic, but it always sounded like it was just meant to be taken as a myth to me anyway. Then again, it’s established in the Grimoire that Brother has a fixation specifically on making money so he can support himself and Yonah (versus Papa Nier, who has obviously already established himself as an adult rather than a kid still figuring things out and hoping that enough money will solve all their problems).

Where the dialogue doesn’t diverge is interesting, too. Mostly I’m talking about the scene after defeating Hook. I always found Papa Nier exclaiming “You’re going to live, Kaine!” and “Yes, we’re friends now!” to be obvious holdovers from a younger protagonist just goddamn hilarious when Papa Nier is saying them. They’re still really funny with Brother Nier but just remembering Papa Nier doing the exact same delivery in his deep, manly voice just re-elevated the whole scene into comedy gold.

All of that is really why I was interested in getting the game so already my money is well spent. But there’s some other stuff:

They butchered the OST! ...or so people keep telling me on Youtube. I admit I do think the re-orchestrations is largely inferior to the original (although there are some that are at least as good in a different way, and whatever they did to The Lost Forest -- which was one of my least favorite tracks in the original -- I really enjoy) but I wouldn’t call it a butchering and I highly suspect that if I didn’t have the eleven years of the original OST and its association within the game itself I wouldn’t bat an eye, it still all sounds great.

Also, a weird observation, but I found that the soundtrack sounds much better coming out of the TV speakers than through headphones. I’m not sure if somehow it was optimized for play through external speakers, or maybe just not hearing the added orchestration right up against my eardrums, but when I went to the Lost Shrine with headphones on I was admittedly disappointed, but going to it again and listening through the TV it worked significantly better.

(I’m not sure if this is necessarily a factor, but the booklet in the White Snow edition mentions that the new soundtrack was all studio mixed rather than having the individual tracks layered. While I don’t think that would have an impact on music quality it almost definitely makes a difference in the way it’s produced.)

I miss chest-thrusting to double jump Movement overall feels much more refined and polished. It’s not as slick as Automata, but it definitely feels like a natural evolution of the original game, and as an apologist for NIER’s combat I can appreciate that. A little more responsive, I appreciate being able to move while casting magic, and it still has a bit of a crunch behind weapon impact (although I wish it felt a bit heavier).

But goodness I miss the stupid animation for double-jumping. I mean sure, an aerial somersault is a classic indication of a double jump, but I just loved that Nier would chest-thrust so hard he would break the laws of physics and ascend higher.

It also feels a bit like the aerial dodge was nerfed for movement purposes? I really don’t feel as much horizontal thrust to get a running start after diving off the Library balcony.

Fully voiced? Fully voiced?! I knew this was happening but I totally forgot until the NPC villagers started talking to me! Some of the incidental deliveries are a bit awkward, but as somebody whose glasses prescription is a decade out of date I appreciate this immensely.

The item guy in Seafront just being from the goddamn Bronx is a thing of beauty.

BroNier does fit into the Village better. One of the little details I love in the game is that each bit of civilization has its own style. The maps aren’t large enough to really convey how long travel takes, but the different styles between the Village and Seafront just kind of helped to ‘place’ the characters in a really neat, subtle way (Emil’s sash identifies him as ‘belonging to’ Seafront, which is actually pertinent when you get that sidequest where you find the letter from his science-mom in town! I assume she always wore a kicky sash when she went to work in the underground child torture bunker.)

Facade obviously also has their own style, but it’s... hard not to appreciate.

Papa Nier’s dress doesn’t really ‘place’ him anywhere, which doesn’t feel weird for the main character, and I feel like it’s implied that he isn’t really from the Village in a meaningful way anyway and kind of drifted in at some point after Yonah had been born. But younger Brother Nier is actually wearing the local fashion and it’s a neat little detail that I didn’t appreciate back when I played PS3 RepliCant. (Probably because I didn’t bother talking to any NPCs what with not being able to read the dialogue, so I never really had him standing next to anybody for long enough to process.) Older Brother Nier takes on a very different outfit that winds up displacing him from the rest of the Village (and any other towns), which is a pretty nice visual metaphor, too.

I have a confession to make. I still enjoy fishing in this game.

Yeah I said it. I’ll say it again too-- I like the fishing minigame. I happily blitzed through the Fisherman’s available Gambits, and then just caught five sharks while I was hanging out, and then also caught the sandfish ahead of time, and also wound up with a half-ton giant catfish (??!?) trying to remember where the black bass are located.

Cart me away.

Related but I laughed far too hard when the fisherman says “the WESTERN beach”. I wonder why they changed that line. I just can’t imagine.

And those seals. Always a delight to go to early Seafront and just plant yourself between a couple of seals. Watch the ocean. Listen to the music and the waves. Watch the seals lazily roll around and make cute seal barks.

The most depressing thing about the timeskip is losing those seals.

My garden--! The gardening timeskip exploit was fixed due to a difference in PS4 architecture. :/ I know there’s still an exploit involving time zones but I didn’t go in knowing that and I was horrified when I adjusted the system clock only to find my crops weren’t growing. Is Legendary Gardener still a trophy? Fffffuuuuu

My BARREN TEMPLE. The Barren Temple is, to me, a legitimately funny dungeon, between Sechs getting himself abducted, Kaine getting herself abducted and Nier and Weiss just sighing in resignation, and the whole concept of the rules-based challenges. And the adjustment they made to the Prince’s dialogue before you meet him is so good-- the original felt a little disjointed and felt like it ended with the Prince being confused. It was still funny, but here Weiss just gives zero fucks about insulting the Prince (and presumably knows that’s exactly who he’s talking to) and it’s just great.

And I say all of that because I just died laughing when I got to the infamous Racing Wolf room and saw they outlawed evasion.

Evasion works differently in this game anyway so you wouldn’t have really been able to do the same trick before (dodge roll; in the original release you would dodge roll forward by tapping the button, but a default evasion has you backstep. Of course you could arrange BroNier to face away from the trap and then evade, but it would be significantly dicier, and I feel like the pattern on the shots was awkward enough that you wouldn’t have an opening in the second row (and probably would’ve have dodged your ass right into the bullets anyway). But just that they acknowledged the trick and then flipped you off with it was amazing. Aggravating? My amusement far outweighed my frustration since the Defend trick was still solid.

It also felt like more rooms outlawed jumping? That I can’t corroborate (I was really focusing on whether they did something to Racing Wolf, which is of course the most traumatic of the rooms) but I feel like it wasn’t as easy to cheese some of those rooms as it had been previously.

Dark Blast is amazing. Cheesed the shit out of the actual ‘Evasive Mouse’ room, though. I remember having some difficulties when the miniboss shows up since you can’t dodge out of the way of his lava pillar attack, but I just circle-strafed with Dark Blast and he died comically quickly.

This is actually more relevant to the magic as a whole, but in the time since I first played NIER (so... probably the time I fifth played NIER) I learned more about the little intracacies of the magic system. Like, really little intricacies, like how you can use magic with just a button tap and it actually has different effects... like Dark Blast dealing significantly more damage. It’s not as easy as just holding down the button and getting the multi-shot off the charge, but for a single enemy like that just rapid-fire tapping the button chews through the lifebar.

This tap strategy is really appreciated for Dark Hand (forward thrust punch) and Dark Lance (which is even better thanks to the game’s lock-assist-- a much appreciated quality-of-life adjustment), and I look forward to getting Dark Execution because of its fast activation feature (spreading the lances in a forward cone in front of you, extremely useful for crowd control when you can’t afford to wait for Execution to charge up).

Fragile Delivery still sucks. I don’t know why I had such a terrible time with the first Fragile Delivery but I broke that... Ming vase or whatever you’re delivering half a dozen times. Send that guy a steel rug instead, Guard #3, he is not worth whatever piece of art you had me destroy six times.

And the game still holds up. This is probably a ‘needless to say’ thing but yeah, this is still a great game. I always have a little bit of apprehension going back to something I loved just in case there’s a rose-colored effect going on. Not that I really expected that to happen with this game (I’ve played NIER recently enough that I didn’t think nostalgia would blind me) but, you know, always a possibility.

(That and that the remaster would be... perhaps of dubious quality. It happens.)

Nope! Still engaging. Still charming. I’m always impressed to go back to this game with all the knowledge of its inevitable misery and remember that it’s also just plain funny. NIER is one of those games that’s just like I remember it but better every time I go back to it.

I’m so glad that Automata did well enough to spur greater interest in this game. It really didn’t get the chance it deserved back in 2010 and now it’s topping some of the sales charts. That’s fantastic.

Just... fantastic.

[the-shiftshop]

The Closet - Part 1

My apologies for having a very long time to upload new content. It was a very stressing month and I had to pass a lot of requirements to such, but I will now try my best to upload more!

A few weeks after my Grand Father Armando’s death. The guilt and sadness I was feeling only worsen when I didn’t get to attend his funeral in the Philippines due to important work. I have nobody to blame but myself for leaving the country. Especially when everyone thought it’s for me to find a better school abroad. Even my parents thought I found a good college in the US, but no, it was just me chasing after a guy I lusted over the internet. All this time, I thought he wanted me back, but that’s not it. I wasted my time going abroad. I had to stay there because everyone would suspect me if I suddenly go back, and I also had to pursue studying in a university which isn’t really why I came to US.

All because of my messed up “drooling” over a guy, I had to leave my dearest grand father alone. I thought my family would take good care of him, but knowing that they are all abusive and toxic, look where he is now.

Going through Grampa’s stuffs, I once again saw everything that could remind me of him. He kept the medal I gave him which I received after winning in a Robotics Contest. I also saw this dog-like mechanism that I made out of cardboard when I was graduating elementary. I saw tons of pictures of him carrying me in his arms. I couldn’t help but sit down on my grand father’s bed and cry. As I said, I have no one to blame but myself. I couldn’t get rid of this growing guilt in my heart.

Looking for more stuffs while crying, I saw a huge box with my name on it. I quickly opened the box and saw tons of presents wrapped in different designs. Some are for Christmas and some are for my birthdays. I quickly opened them all and removed them out the box one by one. These were all for robots. There are a lot of spare parts and tools that I can use for my crafts. It really seemed like Grampa still remembered that I love making robots when I was young. It only made me cry more when I realized that he’s been buying me gifts for my dream when I myself already gave up on them.

Reaching the last gift, I noticed a notepad stuck on the very bottom of the box where all the gifts were stored. I pulled it out at read it.

To my Dearest Gabriel, I wish that you liked my gifts. Although this isn’t all that I bought. There’s a wooden closet near the window.

It was written in my grampa’s handwriting. I didn’t have to think twice. I stood up and ran to the closet he pointed at. The closet was about as tall as I was, maybe taller by a few inches. It was made of wood and there are a few antique designs on its exterior. I was more that excited to check what’s inside, but as I open it, it was nothing but empty.

As I stare in the empty wooden cabinet, a few possibilities came to me. Maybe the gift was too precious, my cousins took advantage of it, or maybe the gift was the closet itself. Whatever it may, I forced myself to not thing negatively. If Grampa bought this closet for me, then I should store these other gifts inside.

After putting all the gifts inside, I closed the closet and sat back Grampa’s bed. It’s almost 7 pm. I’m tired and can’t even move after letting go of all this emotional baggage. Dad won’t look for me anyway since he knows where I am. I should maybe rest here for the night.

It was a very strange night. Even though I’m deep asleep, I keep hearing things clanking in the room. I couldn’t bring myself to stand up and check where it was coming from, but I’m sure I keep hearing like someone’s doing metal-works at night. It all ended when there was a beeping noise for about 3 seconds. I swore I heard some robotic voice, but I couldn’t hear what it said. Anyways, now that it stopped, maybe I can peacefully sleep once again.

I had a dream last night too. It’s certainly because I still cannot move on with that guy I was talking about. There’s a guy lying beside me, hugging me with one arm, and groping my chest and abs. I couldn’t move nor talk. It was like sleep paralysis but instead of a demon, I have this hot guy caressing my whole body. I eventually fell back to sleep inside a dream due to the warmth he was emitting. Soon I was awake again.

Nobody was on my bed. That’s for sure. It was still dark. I rose up and looked the room, searching for something weird, but none was found. I heard something clinking downstairs, in the dining room, I guess. I checked what time it was on my phone. It’s about 3 am. Am I really being haunted by a demon right now? Whatever it may, I had to gather up my courage and went outside grampa’s room. The lights were on. Every light was on, actually. I slowly walked down the stairs, looking down, and there I saw him.

My eyes widened. There’s a naked hunk sitting by the table. He was looking up, back at me. His grin turned into a huge cute smile and he waved at me, but that wasn’t where I was focused at. I was staring at his body, and to his crotch. I blushed and covered my eyes, still peeking though.

“Uy, Gab. Kain na. Pinagluto pa kita ng paburito mo.” The man said, in my native language. It was warm but assertive at the same time. “At alam kong hindi ka pa kumakain ng hapunan kagabi.” He said, still with that warm smile on his face.

“H-Hey! Who are you! Why are you he- Where are you naked!” I exclaimed. He stood up and I got a much better look of his body. D-Damn?

“Ah, Mukhang hindi ka pala maalam mag Tagalog, at mukhang kelangan ko din ng bagong file para makapag download ako ng maayos na English.” He said. He suddenly closed his eyes. He was stuck like that for a few seconds, then once again, his eyes opened. He returned to his warm smile. “Hey, Gab. Let’s eat. I’ve cooked your favorite food, and I know you didn’t eat dinner last night.”

“You didn’t answer my question! Who are you!” I again exclaimed. The guy was clearly not a burglar. What kind of a vigilante would want to steal some house naked? and looking at him just... feels... good? It’s like he’s a total copy of my dream man. Right color of skin, right amount of muscles, cute eyes, nose and lips, that damn smile, the way he talk to me. It’s all too good to be true.

“That’s up to you.” He replied to my question. “What do you want my name to be?”

I dropped my hands. I had a huge realization. I quickly ran back to Grampa’s room and opened the closet. Everything was gone, except for the tools Grampa gave me and the packages where the spare parts would be. I ran back out and stopped in the middle of the stairs. He was still standing there. He looked again at me and smiled.

“What do you mean by ‘it’s up to me’?” I asked.

“Well.... I’m your personal robot boyfriend now. That’s what you’ve been looking for right? Unless, you want me to turn into your grampa instead, or you bestfr-”

“No! You don’t have to!” I ran down the starts to meet him. I was now about 6 feet away from him. “You... Stay as you are for now.” I said.

“Your grand father knew.” He said. I stared at him.

“What?”

“He knew about why you went abroad.” He answered. “That’s why he wanted to make you a perfect boyfriend.”

I gasped and looked away. I turned around stared at my Grampa’s picture hanged on the wall. “How about you? How did you know about that?”

“The closet.” He replied. “I’m a product of the closet he bought from a store. His words were kept in the closet. He said that he wanted to make the perfect man for you, and thus, I came to be.”

I felt him move closer and he put his arms around my body. He took me into a warm hug. I could hear him chuckle in joy. It was sincere. It wasn’t like he’s acting or if someone pulled a prank on me. It all felt true.

“Gab, am I perfect enough?” He asked in my ear. His voice. It made me so much aroused. Every vibration of his voice went through my whole body from my head to toe. 

“Y-Yes...” I agreed.

He then turned me around and hugged me much better. “Thank you.”

[originalcontent]

Oooookay. Welcome back. Posting about pathologic part 4 I think? Part 4. We just reached Act 4 too, so everything’s going according to schedule. This gaming session had some ups and downs. Ups: That good good lore, and a lot of quality time spent with my good pals Daniil  and Changeling and also Clara apparently, although she might not be my good pal after all, but w/e. Downs: FUuuuUUUUCKkkk we are so bad at video games, and also the kin folk have become A Lot, holy shit. Where to start.

Okay so this time the game wasn’t actually super stressful for me personally bc this time I kind of just handed off the controls to my sister every time shit got dangerous. She’s a lot better at video games than me. Shoutout @akpaley​ for keeping me from dying from stress in real life.

The drawback of this is that since she’s a lot better at video games she’s also a lot more willing to actually take risks rather than just running away from literally everything. Which I won’t deny, has gotten us a lot of much-needed money and resources but also.

WELCOME TO THE FUCKING DEATH SPIRAL PART OF THE GAME. I guess it had to happen eventually, right? Fuuuuuuuck us, do you have any fucking idea how much shit you have to redo when you’re randomly shanked by some dude every fifteen minutes? And they’re harder to fight every time we come back, apparently, and also our health is like permanently half gone? Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck why are there not more clocks.

Victor Kain, you were the one who made the clocks?? I could fucking kiss you. I owe you my life. Or like, six hundred of my lives. Hhh.

Okay, seriously though, the clock lore is actually kind of sick. Victor told us that they’re smaller versions of the cathedral, and we were like “!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THaT’S WHerE wE RESET THE GaME IN THe PROLOGUE!!!!!!! METAPHYSICS!!!!!!!!!” The Kains are so cool.

(Maria Kaina got infected tho. Sorry, you. :( Although technically that happens later.)

Um, we gave the rest of our shmowder to Khan. We’re out now. We’ve been looking for more but haven’t found anything.

Also we made a random potion, and the plague showed up and was like “fuck you,” and I was like “damn, calm the hell down, you’re the one fucking killing people.”

Met with the Saburovs more. They were like “we have another suspect!” and I was like “yeah they probably don’t but w/e” and my sister was like “they’re in an infected land and we should probably save their lives” and I was like “why do we care about helping the Saburovs again, literally all they do is accuse random people of killing my dad, the Kains are obviously the best family, we should just be throwing in with them” and she was like “that’s not all they do, they also run the guards, you know those guys who patrol plague districts?” and I was like “okay fuck you’re right let’s visit them” and it turns out that that there was actually some super cool lore pertaining to the town’s mistresses. Also, god if they don’t have some cool reflections. I love everything about this town’s history.

Afterwards we randomly decided to visit Yulia for literally no reason, and she was like “I’m glad you’re here, I have a lot of super heavy important shit to discuss with you about the Inquisition that will be here tomorrow, it sure is convenient that you’re in my neighborhood for some reason even though I live in an incredibly inconvenient location?” Also she knows something about the nature of Artemy, Daniil, and Clara-or maybe the Changeling but she called her Clara? Oh yeah, Daniil was there too for some reason. Poor guy, I don’t think he’s okay. He cried on my shoulder a lot, he was endearingly open and earnest and for once I felt bad about the dialogue options wherein Artemy throws shade.

And then Clara happened to be standing outside literally right then? I wonder if that was going to be a big quest location and we just happened to arrive right before the game told us to go there anyway. I think that’s it actually. We’re so good, damn. Clara keeps pulling shit and then immediately trying to reconcile and asking for help. I really like her, but we really shouldn’t be trusting her right?

Oh Murky was also there and she set up a meeting between us and her “friend” and that night we went and Clara and Changeling were both there and I’m so confused???? What is her deal? But!! Changeling facilitated a deal between me and the plague! And Murky is now off the hit list!!!!!!!!!! Does this mean she’ll live? Anyway the plague started talking to us, and our infection rose a bit in an unhealable way, and, dumbasses that we were, said “wow this is probably all just the natural consequence of the bargain we made. Guess there’s literally nothing we can do to address this.” (Spoiler: That is not the case, the cost of the pact was literally just that we became infected and would have to cure it with fire before it killed us. We figured that out eventually, I promise.)

Fast forward to the next day after we finish the day’s entire fucking plotline, when we have done literally nothing so our infection’s increased a shit ton and it starts actually killing us. And since we only have like half our potential health bar from getting killed so much, we literally can’t survive long enough to treat it. We run around trying to cure ourselves and die like ten more times before we finally accept that we just have to go back in time to before the infection was this bad, try to get cured immediately, and redo the whole day. There’s a whole fucking skeleton out by the theatre by now btw. Fucking death spirals. This play session took a long fucking time okay?

Alright, flash backward again. After talking with Changeling, we visit Stakh because after rescuing him twice in a row he promised we could talk. We go to his house and he’s sleeping, or maybe just pretending to sleep, but either way Artemy has the absolute sweetest little monologue, just talking to him, and so much has happened but I can tell there’s still a lot of tenderness there between them even if it’s buried deep, and it’s just such a soft scene against such a harsh story.

Guess who’s dead by morning.

The next day Aglaya showed up and was like “see me immediately,” so obviously we visit Capella and then town hall first off. Daniil’s there, he bitches to me about Aglaya for a bit. So cute, we really are friends. I promise to help him with corpse duty bc Capella wanted me to visit Grace anyway. We talk to the official people at the official desks, one is collecting babies, one is giving me some lunch money as a very good reward for being a very good little surgeon, and one is telling me that actually money is illegal now but here are some free coupons that actually are too cheap to buy anything with.

Aglaya is the woman from the prologue! Hhhh things are really building to a point, aren’t they. I wonder how Yulia knows her. But damn, the whole village was out there waiting to meet with her weren’t they.

I made a deal with the rat prophet to clear some space in the graveyard so Grace would be okay. Dunno what will come of that. I’ve been seeing him everywhere lately though.

I met with Oyun and gave him my dad’s house. I met with Aspity and was like “did you kill Stakh” and she gave me some vague shit, and in general I am very upset at the kinfolk right now but I tried to save them anyway. Went to the termitary and did the whole termitary thing. Wow that sure is a place, right? God, have I ever mentioned how much I love all the screaming soundtracks  in this game.

Damn, Taya’s whole child queen vibe is unsettling.

The whole termitary is horrible, and what the kin folk have been put through is horrible, but their obsession with blood and strength legit terrifies me. I’ve spent all my time until now trying to convince everyone that they aren’t bad, and that they aren’t to blame for the disease, but now they want to kill? And they really really really want me to be a killer too. And the whole thing with Taya is creepy as fuck too, she’s just a kid. Anyway, we’re sending Vlad the older to them, I don’t know whether he or his son deserves to be torn apart more, but Changeling was really upset at the idea of Vlad the younger going there, so I guess we’re backing her. We run all around town making sure the right Olgimsky is going, and then we realize we actually have a few hours left so we take a hospital shift too! And then we die of disease like six times.

Okay, flash forward again, we’ve gone back, gotten some guy to molotov cocktail us, redone the entire termitary thing, saved the game on Vlad’s clock after sending him to his doom (sorry dude). That’s where we’re at currently.

(Only it’s not actually, we went back and spent like an hour going back and forth between the termitary and Oyun again trying to deal with their shit, and everyone was like “murder all dissenters :D” and I was like “what the fuck” and the day was almost over but then a dude stabbed us and we randomly died, and none of these places had clocks, so at that point we were basically like “yeah it’s after midnight, let’s just call it quits.”)

Anything else......oh, the warehouses are at risk again. Notkin and Sticky, what would I do if anything happened to them. I hope my medicines are good enough, I gave some to Bad Grief too but now all there really is to do is wait. :(

Oh, I once again have thoughts on how fucking theatrical is it that everything in the game is simultaneously literal and metaphorical, it’s gorgeous, and have I mentioned the costuming choices for the Orderlies and the Plague, hhhhhhhh, not to say anything nice about Mark fucking Immortell, but he knows what he’s doing with this thing. Listen if this post weren’t already way too long I would just gush about the theatrical elements again, but sadly it is too long.

Okay, that was our latest session! We’ll be back either very soon or in like three weeks.

[cluelesslychosen]

✜The Lost Spark✜

✜AU EVENT✜

“Mum said her shipment is going to take a while.” Momi turns to her younger siblings and pulls out her wallet. “She’s giving you guys ¥2000 each for lunch and other stuff. Don’t spend it all at once, okay?” Dani gives her sister a silent nod and takes her share of the allowance. Riley swipes the remaining money. “What about you?” He asks “You’re not coming with us for lunch?” “I wish, I’m going to help Mum carry the resin supplies. She’s got a deadline and needs to get the  sculpt and prototypes done fast.” Momi replies, tucking away her wallet and adjusting her bag. “You two are big kids.” She tells him “Besides, Dani’s with you and you guys know Shibuya station. We’ll meet by the konbini when we’re done, okay?” “But it’s so crowded,” Dani whines to them both “Can’t we stay with you guys?”  she pleads. “I don’t like the noise.” “I mean you could,” Momi replies “But you’ll have to wait until we get on the train to get a meal.” Riley rolls his eyes at both his sisters. “I don’t want to babysit Dani.” he groans, “I always have to babysit her when we go to Shibuya!” “You’re not babysitting her! The both of you are looking out for each other.” Momi asserts herself, crossing her arms. “The two of you wanted to come so don’t be giving each other grief, okay?” Dani shrinks herself and glances her eyes away from their sister. Riley scowls, shoving his hands in his sweater pockets. Momi takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of her nose. “Guys, please.” She begs, “It's only for a little while. Please, keep an eye out for each other. I’ll make it up to you guys when we get home, okay? We’ll text you when we’re done.” “... Whatever.” Riley scoffs before immediately turning away and walking down the hall. Dani stands beside Momi in silence before speaking up. Dani whimpers to her sister, “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, Dani.” Momi sighs, patting her head and ruffling a bit, “You didn’t. He’s… frustrated at a lot of things right now.” Momi then puts her hand on Dani’s back and pushes her forwards, “Go on, get something to eat. Mum and I will see you guys in a bit, okay?”

Ten minutes and ¥500 poorer, Riley sits down at a bench and looks at his food. Beef Omurice. Typical of him, being a picky eater he thinks to himself. He watches his older sister across from his seating.  He could tell from here she was having trouble with speaking and asking questions.

Whatever, she could do it herself. She’s not a baby, he tells himself as he shuffles his bag onto his lap to put away his wallet. Only to open it and see the round, white form of Calumon sleeping unaware in his backpack. Oh no. Not here!

“Hey!” He whispers and shakes his bag a little to stir the creature up. “Psst! No free rides!” The Calumon opens their enormous eyes and yawns before turning and giving Riley a small wave. If this were a cat, he’d find this adorable. But this was a digimon so-

He grabs onto the creature and pulls it out of his bag by the nape of their neck and glares at them. “Why do you keep bothering me?!” he hisses at them. They simply just tilt their head with a “Luu...”

He rolls his eyes with a scoff. before he can do anything the creature immediately escapes his grip and darts for his bento. Eyes hungry. “Oh no you don’t!” He holds their head in one hand while keeping his meal in the other. “I’m not letting you steal another bite of food!”

He pauses when he feels the eyes of the crowd peering in his direction. Riley can feel the judgement radiating from them as they stared. Pressing down on him like a weight while he feels his heartbeat quicken.

Too many eyes, he can feel their thoughts. He needs to go. He has to go. He needs air. Disregarding Calumon he shoves his meal in his bag and begins running from the bench and down the hall. Confused at his quick exit, Calumon floats on the spot before chasing after the boy, concerned. “Psst-” Dani pauses from her purchasing process, about to pay for her lunch when Kain whispers. In his Kyaromon form he fits in his partner’s backpack without others noticing. “Dani!” he whispers, “Dani, Riley's running off!” Uh-oh. Dani gives an apologetic bow to the cashier and places her meal down. “I’m so sorry, I’m not hungry anymore. Have a good day-” She turns and launches after her brother in the ever noisy crowd. The noise made her vision buzz but she pushed past that as fast as she could. Losing her brother in Shibuya would be a nightmare. She couldn’t let her parent’s down again. Riley runs. He ran past the crowds, not paying attention to where he was going. Soon enough, the sounds of people faded and the sounds of his footsteps echoed off the corridors. He takes his deep breaths in the cool air and as he recollects he realizes where he is. A corridor that was in preparation for a remodel. This hall was open but no one was using it. He rubs his face and leans against the plywood wall. Finally… Calm. “Caluu!!” Or not. The little digimon toddles over and rests on Riley’s shoulder. He scoffs trying to pull them off but their tiny claws cling onto his sweater. They let out a rather defiant “No!” in response and he lets go. Huh? They’ve never… spoke before and that caught Riley off guard. The digimon clung on with determination, fear and… concern? Why was he picking up concern? He stares at the little creature for a moment before replying. “Did you… talk-” Riley’s eyes widen for a moment when that familiar tell-tale feeling returns. Pins and needles shot up his legs and then his spine. The pressure building in his head as he grabs onto it. Calumon clutches onto the boy. They make concerned noises for Riley as he tries to steady himself. The lights in the corridor all begin to flicker in intervals. He squeezes his eyes shut. The wind inside dies to a whisper and the temperature plunges. Not freezing but it feels cold and wet like a late autumn rainstorm. There's silence. “No-No, just breathe, breathe-” Riley mutters as he tries to ignore everything. Until the sound of rushing water hits his ears and eyes snap open. Water rushes out from the other side of the tunnel, freezing cold, dark water. The warm lights turn a sterile white. His breath is visible as he tries to calm himself down but finds himself failing in every aspect. The episodes before were bad but never like this. This was different. Completely different! “W-What the hell is going on--” “Child… Oh, Child...” The voice creeps into his ears like a squirming worm. The word carried on a struggling breath. Lungs water-locked and gurgling. It paralyzes him, legs refusing to move as he feels his stomach churn. He knows he needs to run but that voice- He turns his head towards the rushing water. 

Three, large red eyes pierce through the darkness ahead. Before the rest of it begins to slither out the darkness. Sharp teeth glimmer in the lifeless light in a grin full of malice. His voice hitches in his throat. Body frozen, terror overriding every function. Before finally, finally he-

Dani’s digivice begins beeping in her sidepack as she runs down the hall. Kain pops his head out and jumps from Dani’s backpack, digivolving into his Impmon stage. “I got a bad feeling about this Dani!” He calls out as he runs beside her. They both round a corner and see the unfinished corridor. A terrified scream sounds from the corridor. A scream they both knew well enough by now. “That’s Riley!-” Dani charges into the tunnel with little hesitation. Kain hesitates but follows, Evolving once more into his Wizardmon state. They run through the hall as fast as their legs can go. The lights flickered, hurting Dani’s eyes. With each flicker the lights grew cold, the corridor grew longer. Space warping. Shoes splashing into rising water. The current makes it harder to traverse.

“Riley?!” Dani called out through the tunnel. Pause. A Scream. Running faster, filled with trepidation they move. As fast as their bodies can through the raging current. The scream gets louder. A blinking of lights, they reach the scene. Almost frame by frame. Riley is trying to dodge the digital monster’s limbs, splashing around in a panic. Calumon hides in his hood and cries out in fear. Claws grip onto his waist and he screams again. His eyes catch onto Dani’s, reflecting the fear and terror back. Kain moves without thinking, pulling his staff from his cape. A large fireball crashes into the squidlike demon. It roars in agony, clutching onto it’s face as fire takes it. Seeing this opening Riley bolts, trying to use the current to gain any semblance of speed. It feels as if a few feet are miles. His legs can’t seem to take a proper stride and he fumbles hard through the knee deep waters. “Riley!” Dani shouts at the top of her lungs, out stretching both her arms to him. She runs forward to him, not caring if Kain screams at her to stay back. Only keeping her brother safe mattered to her. Riley stumbles forward, water in his eyes and head pounding. He sees Dani running towards him. He forgets his resentment, his anger, his fear in this moment and he cries out for his big sister. Arms reaching for her. “Dani!”

So close. 

But they don’t reach. A tendril shoots from the darkness and wraps itself around Riley. Both Riley and Calumon are  wretched backwards. Riley’s goggles sent flying. Dani helplessly watches as her brother gets pulled away into the darkness. What she thought was darkness. What was a darkened tunnel was in actuality a rift of some kind. Seeing this, Riley struggles hard against his captor. As hard as he thrashes it’s not enough, only getting one arm free. He continues to reach for Dani in desperation.

“Dani! Help me! Dani!” He begs with tears forming in his eyes. The darkness consumes both the digimon and Riley. They disappear. Dani stands there, arms outstretched to nothing, water disappearing and air returning. But in her shock Kain jumps forwards. He holds out his hands and yells out, in rage. “Give him back, you Monster!”

 Magic sparks from his hands and he pulls his hands apart. The closing rift jerks with resistance. The Wizardmon struggles to hold the portal open. “Go Dani! I’ll follow you!” He yells back at his partner, still frozen. “Go! Now!” His words break Dani out of her paralysis. Her eyes drift to her brother’s goggles. With a nod she steels herself, takes a deep breath. Dani grabs onto Riley’s goggles. She had to get Riley back! She shouts in her mind and runs full speed and jumps through the rift. The moment Dani leaps through, Kain releases the portal and runs right behind her. 

It feels like static, cold static. It’s hard to move limbs, hard to see. Hard to breathe. Riley feels the void around him getting more and more cold. The humanoid creature continues dragging him and Calumon down. He swears he hears it laughing at him. Speaking in a language he doesn’t quite understand but he can tell what it’s thinking. It’s in the throes of victory. He has a child, he’s won. His master will praise him. Like hell he will!

He uses his free arm to hit the tendril as hard as he can. He didn’t care if the impact would shoot pins and needles down his arm “Let go of me!” He screams into the dark, hitting as hard as he can. Calumon clings to Riley before they hop off and begins to try and remove the tendril’s grip around Riley. A futile effort as the squid like monster snatches Calumon in his oversized arm. “PEST!” it shouts as it’s claws start crushing the little digimon. Calumon in turn cries out in pain from the bigger digimon’s grip. Hearing the tiny digimon cry out in pain seemed to awaken something in Riley. Something he can’t understand but he runs on instinct.

“Don’t--” Something feels like it’s burning in him. “You--” Something that he let go from deep within. “Hurt--” At this moment he didn’t care about the need to hold back. “Her!” There was no one else here. It was do or die.

His fist hits the digimon, burning white light sears the digital flesh of their captor. He screams out again in agony.  Holding this child was like holding a glowing hot stone. They try to bite through the pain but it's too much. The white light completely overwhelmed his body. Like a star in the dark and as intense.  Grappling onto the sea demon’s arm he screams out one last time. “Let us go!”

The light radiating off of him almost becomes flame like. White hot and incinerates the limb of the digimon. Data disperses as the light burns it’s arms away, running up and burning the left side. The digimon screams in complete agony to the point it rather drop its prey or die. It chooses self preservation. It darts away into the digital sea. It sounds like it’s screaming for forgiveness from someone but Riley can't make a word of it. His vision is going blurry.

Calumon, now retreats to the boy. They cling onto his hoodie and cry out to him but he’s fading. Both in a literal and figurative sense. His eyes glaze over as the light begins to fade away. Calumon knew they had to do something. Riley saved them. They had to save him back. They can’t last here, Riley definitely can’t last here. They close their eyes and the gem on their forehead glows. Calumon doesn’t know what they’re doing but all they do know is that they had to save Riley. Bring him somewhere safe. The remains of Riley’s light merges with Calumon’s. A force pushes them upwards. Away from the darkness.  

There's a brief resistance the closer they get to the light. Before it feels like they shattered through a glass wall. The small white digimon opens their bleary eyes. and sees now they are in the digital stream, the current of a network. Calumon feels relief before they lay themselves on the now unconscious Riley's body. They too needed rest. Unaware of what their power had done.

Wherever they drift too, it was better than the darkness they escaped.

[sabraeal]

Through the Wringer

Go For Broke | Previous

Obiyuki AU Bingo Mystery AU

“So let me get this straight.” Suzu heaves a sigh like a pair of cement shoes, nose pinched between a pair of fingers so long and spindly that if he moved them together with the other eight, spiders would start jawing on about his fine set of gams. “You just...gave her the paper.”

“Gave is a strong word.” Obi kicks his heels up, dirt crumbling right onto the placard that reads SUZU EASON, ADJUNCT. “I showed her the stuff, and she took ‘em.”

Right out of his hands too, so quick he’d hardly had time to blink. That Nowakoski girl had some fight to her, that’s for sure.

“And by ‘she,’ you mean our murderess,” Suzu snips, waving his hands. “Get your boots off my desk! This is-- this is an academic institution, not some-- some speakeasy or something.”

He slants his smirk the way he knows will drive his favorite almost-professor crazy. “They don’t let you do it at bars either.”

“Then I cannot fathom why you think you can do this here, to my very own desk!” Suzu frowns down at the worn desktop, running his fingers over the grooves of the hundred despairing adjuncts that came before. “I just got the thing, Obi, I want to keep it nice for at least a little while.”

He gives it to him, dropping his soles back down to the dirt. The egghead looks like he could use the break.

“And stop smiling!” Suzu huffs, brushing the clay and gravel off after him. “You just let a murderess take our only proof that Kain Wisteria may have died of something other than an unlucky break in Amiens.”

Obi waggles a finger at him “You’ve been hanging around that fussy grouch box and his rocks, haven’t you?”

Suzu puffs up, using all six foot, four inches of him to be just as intimidating as Raggedy Andy. “Professor Lata is a tenured professor.”

Obi doesn’t have the heart to tell him that’s not as impressive to all the non-eggheads outside.

“And he’s the geology chair,” he continues, as if that’s helping matters. “So his opinion--”

“Ah.” Obi fishes a wrapper out of the trash, the spicy scent of hot pastrami still thick on the air. “He bought you lunch.”

Suzu deflates, eyes skittering away from Obi’s grin. “I don’t see what that has to do with anything.”

“Seems to me like you’re taking pages out of his book,” he says as Suzu snatches the paper out of his hands, crumpling it back down into the trash. “Being a real grouch, I mean.”

“I’m not-- I’m not being grouchy!” he hisses, mouth pulled thin. “Do you know how much trouble I could get into for all this? You told me this would just be a little favor and now--” he throws up his hands-- “I didn’t even ask Shidan for permission! We’re sitting on a-- a ticking time bomb of a theory that you just gave to a murderer.”

“Oh come on.” He shrugs beneath the weight of his trench. “She didn’t kill anyone.”

Suzu’s as pale as they come in this city, so it’s a real light show when he gets hot and bothered. Which he is right now, if Obi can tell his colors.

“And which head made that deduction?” he grits out. “I’ve practically staked my career on this-- by accident-- and now our only proof is in the hands of--”

“Hey.” A head sticks around the corner, wearing a face so cute someone could slap it on a doll and it’d sell like hotcakes. “So this is where you’re hiding out.”

“Oh!” Suzu presses a hand to his chest, clutching at the cotton of his button-down. “It’s just you, Yuzuri. Can you tell Obi that he can’t just--”

“I’m not here to get involved in your lover’s quarrel.” Her hands hook on her hips, right where her sweater meets the swell of a decent pair of hips. “Shake a leg, mister. You’re needed down in reception.”

Suzu blinks. “Wha?”

Yuzuri’s mouth purses, sour, accentuated by the vibrant blush of her lipstick. Most earthly creatures could only aspire to be in Haki Arluleon’s league, but the department’s secretary certainly comes closer than most. “Kihal Guerreiro is down there reenacting Sunrise Over Okinawa.”

Obi tilts his chair back, mind grinding through his memories like a freight train through a signal gate. “Isn’t that the one where the girl burns down--”

“Sure is.” She fixes Suzu with a glare. “And it’s your fault.”

Ah, the girl’s got spunk. No wonder Suzu’s so stuck on her.

The aforementioned adjunct gapes. “M-me? I’ve never met her in my life! I don’t know anyone famous!”

Yuzuri cocks her hip in a way that clearly says, yeah, pull the other one, too.

“Okay, well,” he hedges, “I did see Rita Hayworth having an ice cream once. But that’s it, I promise!”

“I don’t care if you saw Hedy Lemarr dancing naked on Rodeo,” she snaps. “That woman is down there kicking up a real fuss because of you.”

Suzu goes whiter than a sheet that’s shook hands with Clorox. “You haven’t-- you haven’t told Shidan, have you?”

She barks out a laugh. “I didn’t have to. She’s down there reading him the riot act as we speak.”

“Oh.” Obi’s seen poltergeists with more solidity than this post-doc. “Oh no.”

“So you better get down there lickity-split,” Yuzuri tells him, “or else I’ll tell her where you live.”

She turns on her heel, real neat, like some of the flyboys did in their birds, showing off that long seam up that back of her nylons before she slams the door behind her, hard enough to rattle a diploma off the wall.

“Oh hell,” Suzu breathes, hands digging runnels through his hair. “Oh hell, I’m in for it now.”

“You know,” Obi muses, gaze lingering on the door. “I like that dame.”

Suzu sighs. “You would.”

Reception’s never been a quiet place; the secretaries are always typing away like gunfire, writing up the department’s next magnum opus or fielding calls that have them cradling their receiver like another appendage, but today it’s certainly, well--

Louder.

“Listen here, Mister.” The words ring off the walls like an air raid siren, spoken from the diaphragm with true talent. “My friend has been calling your office for days, and she hasn’t heard from a single person who can give her an answer for this.”

Obi rounds the corner just in time to see Tinsel Town’s rising star shove a paper right into the professor’s chest, blue eyes blazing with a fire that would put Dresden to shame.

She’s dynamite up close; an Amazon straight off the isle with the stilettos she’s wearing, staring Shidan straight in the eye without having to crane her neck. Every inch of her is as dangerous as the femme fatales that have made her a household name, but still--

He’s hardly paying attention to her. Hard to, when her shadow’s got hair so red it practically blazes.

“My apologies, Miss Guerreiro,” Shidan soothes blandly, gaze hooded with the kind of weariness only a chair could muster. “I would normally be happy to answer any questions one of the public may ask, however--” his mouth pulls thin-- “I wasn’t even aware that one of my fellows had undertaken such an investigation.”

Suzu stiffens beside him, knuckles white where they grip the corner. “Well,” he breathes, backing away. “That’s my cue--”

“Why look.” Shidan’s gaze snaps over his shoulder, fixing Suzu as thoroughly as formaldehyde. “Here’s my fellow now. Suzu--” his teeth flash as quick as gun cotton-- “why don’t you come over here and explain yourself to this nice young woman.”

Suzu gulps, throat making a hollow thunk. “Ah...of course, Professor Weise.”

Obi’s not the kind of guy that leaves a man behind, but as Suzu shuffles his sad-sack self into the fray, he finds himself diverting from the flight plan, circling right around to where a high-necked blouse and Mary Jane bobs worriedly in Guerreiro’s wake.

“Well, well, well.” She jumps, turning those big eyes toward him, green as any of the arsenic bottles in the lab’s cabinet. “If its isn’t our winsome Wisteria heiress. Funny seeing you here.”

Her mouth pulls thin. “Oh. It’s you.”

“It’s me,” he agrees, slipping up beside her. She smells nice, something floral and vanilla that clings to her hair and makes him think of cookies at grandma’s. “I gotta say, Miss, for a humble war nurse, you sure got friends in some very high places.”

She huffs, arms crossing over her chest. “For your information, we met long before she got into show business.”

“That so?” he hums, hiking up a brow. “Now that you mention it, she was in one of Kain Wisteria’s flicks, wasn’t she? That one about the South Pacific.”

“She was in three,” the little miss corrects primly. “But the one you’re looking for is Sunrise Over Okinawa.”

He snaps his fingers. “Right, it came out just as I...”

She turns, all question.

“Ah, never mind,” he coughs. “Seems like Wisteria sure liked her work, if he kept using her like that.”

“Mm.” Her face crumples with the shadow of concern. “He did. He told her that with a little more work, she could be his muse.”

“Hah.” Obi lifts his hat, scratching at the back of his head. “That man liked his muses.”

Her knuckles blanch where they grasp her elbows. “He sure did at that.”

“You know, I’m surprised he didn’t try to put you in one of his flicks.” He grins down at her. “You might not be no Veronica Lake, but you got that Judy Garland look.”

Something happens to her face, so quick he can’t catch more than a ripple of it before it’s gone. She turns to him, shoving a paper into his hand.

“Here’s your report back,” she says, the words trembling. “You might want to be more careful where you leave these things.”

She glances at him, and he hears loud and clear: or who you leave them with.

“Right.” He glances down, catching the coroner’s letter head, stark and official under the university’s warm light. “Hey, ah, if you’re having trouble, I could get you in to see my friend.”

The girl whips back to him, wide-eyed, staring like maybe he’s missing a couple of sandwiches from his picnic basket. “I...appreciate the offer, detective.”

“Obi,” he offers, giddily.

“Obi.” Her mouth parts just slightly, uncertain. “But isn’t he right there? I could just ask him myself.”

“Well, sure,” he wheedles, “but that’s no guarantee he’ll talk to you. You know these egghead types. Insular.” He leans in, flashing a smile that could charm the hose off a Hepburn. “But me, I can put a good word in for you.”

She hums, hose still snug. “That so.”

“Sure thing.” He nods toward the charlie foxtrot happening hardly two yards from where they’re standing. “I could go up there right now and ask for you. I’m sure he’d be happy to do me the favor.”

“Of course he would,” she huffs. “He’s having a strip torn off him from both sides. Thank you very much, Mister...Obi, but I think I can wait.”

“Not at all.” He grins so wide the Cheshire Cat would go green with envy, and he’s rewarded with a look so wary that Wisteria’s pet cop would slap him in irons just to head him off. “Good thing for you, Miss, I don’t have any shame.”

She blink. “What? No, you can’t--”

He steps right up to the Western Front, marked by Guerreiro’s sharp elbow and says, “Hey, Suzu, this is the girl I was telling you about. Miss Nowakowski. She’s got some questions about that report you gave me.”

Suzu goggles at him. “Ah, sure, pal.” His mouth pulls into a rictus grin. “I’d--I’d love to meet her. Why don’t we all just go up to my office--”

“No need.” The red head shoulders through, nearly knocking him off his feet. She might be a tiny thing, but she stands shoulder to shoulder with the rest of them like she’d the tallest personality in the room. “I only came here to say that I’m giving permission to exhume the body.”

Shidan chokes. “I-- I’m sorry? I don’t think I heard that--?”

“I’ve already put in the request at the precinct,” she explains, shoulders square she she stares them all down. “But I want to come down here as request personally that you do the toxicology report, Mr Eason.”

“Oh, I-- I don’t-- I’m not--” Suzu pants, hand hooks in his sweater vest-- “I don’t have the authority for that, Miss.”

“But I do.” Shidan stares down at the lot of them, his mouth in a thin line. “I think we should be discussing this in my office. Come this way, Miss Nowakowski, Miss Guerreiro. It seems I’ve missed a few crucial conversations.”

[rp-repliforce]

The contrast between Commander Signas & General’s ideals

While both desire a peaceful world where reploids and humans can live together in harmony, they both have somewhat different ideas of how it should be achieved.

General’s plan seems straightforward. All he asks is for Reploids to be recognized as a new race of people, and to receive the same treatment, rights, and freedoms as humans. This appeals greatly to the reploid’s side of things, but many humans still aren’t willing to accept such a cultural change. Perhaps it’s too soon.

Commander Signas has a more humble approach regarding humans. He believes that humanity is deserving of respect because not only are they responsible for the creation of Reploidkind, their race has so far withstood the test of time, and were the ones who laid the very foundations of civilization. In his eyes, they’ve achieved much despite their shortcomings. He believes that humankind should still have some degree of authority over reploids (since reploids were created to serve them), but he’s well aware that humans aren’t always good and rational, so he wants reploids to be protected by their own set of rights so that they can’t be (legally) abused by humans with malicious intentions. His idea may not be as easy to sell, but he’s trying his best to find a good balance between the two demographics so that everyone can get what they want in the end.

Overall, I think that General appeals more to reploids, while Signas appeals more to the humans.

Also, bonus ramble about my Signas muse under the cut:

I feel like it’s very rare for a reploid to form that kind of view of humanity. Even more interesting is that I doubt it’s a direct result of his programming. It’s hard to say how he came to this conclusion, but I think it might have something to do with his origins and the promise he made to Dr. Kain before he passed away. I know that seeing his creator’s life coming to a close just as his was beginning really affected him. Even though he didn’t know Dr.Kain very well, he couldn’t help but greive for him. He would visit him in the hospital whenever he could because he really cared about him.

(I think my Signas is a lot more compassionate than he first seems. He’s the kind of guy who’s willing to bear the weight of the whole world by himself for the sake of everyone.)

As for the promise, he swore to Dr. Kain that he wouldn’t fail like Sigma and General did, and that he would do everything in his power to fix everything and redeem Kain’s legacy.

(Also here is a drawing of him helmetless that I’m still not quite satisfied with. His bangs are really difficult to get right.)

[divine-motion]

Pls I want to hear some of that "cringe" patho dishonored au pls (in words if you can!)

i will try for you!! i admit i don’t really have much like “planned out” but i have some scattered Thoughts!!

the Usual Thing happens: artemy, a surgeon and an herbalist, returns home to help his father with the plague, his father was murdered just before he arrived, and so was simon kain (would the kains be an emperor family in this kind of au or would they just be City Rulers as usual? not sure yet), and artemy is now blamed for both murders, beat and stabbed half to death, and thrown in prison to be executed, and so begins artemy burakh’s No Good, Very Bad... Month

daniil dankovsky, local cryptid also known as The Outsider (though he resents that name) gives artemy void powers (blink, whirlwind, and bend time) which lets artemy escape the prison (not without having to kill a few guards on his way out but eh, guards are just cops so it’s fine. morally i mean, for artemy it sucks. poor guy keeps having to murder even though he doesn’t want to)

in the sewers during his escape, artemy meets a teenager called clara the changeling who says it’s important that he survives and offers her help. already in a bad place, artemy accepts and gets plague magic (rat swarm, darkvision, and possession). 

in return he asks if she wants out of the sewers (”what are you even doing down here?!” “just hanging out.”) bc there are rats and rats are dangerous and she just stares at him dead in the eye as she jumps down among a swarm of rats (same one that he saw eat a whole grown guard a few minutes ago) but the rats just follow her like ducklings

after a few hours of navigating through the confusing sewers, artemy finally reaches the river by the edge of the city (would have to be the City-On-Gorkhon this time with lots of tall buildings. the stamatins must be very pleased) and he follows the shore, trying to remember the way to the warehouses, but collapses before he can reach it because of exhaustion and also his mostly untended wounds. can’t decide if it’s gonna be murky, sticky, or one of the Halves that finds him and helps him? would be nice if sticky tries to use his, albeit limited, medicinal knowledge which does end up being enough to get artemy back on his feet, at least for a while

after that i only know that artemy would meet both notkin’s gang and grief’s gang, who both ally themselves with him. in this au lara and grief are still on decent terms if only bc they both find they don’t like the current rulers (maybe block is affiliated with them now?) and then it’s not so bad that grief is playing against their laws

i’m thinking maybe stakh joins the overseers and there’s like. an actual confrontation between artemy and stakh where stakh really does try to kill artemy. like he doesn’t and they become friends again. without a daniil to calm him down i do think it’s possible stakh would try something like that, but i think it’s more out of self-destruction and his “resolve for resolve’s sake” way of thinking if that makes sense?

lots of apple basket gang interaction. yes i will use any excuse to have more apple basket gang. i also just really love the idea of lara and grief having a really close friendship so that would be part of it

georgiy “eugenics enthusiast” kain  and the vlads Will die. perhaps not by artemy’s hand directly but it will happen because i hate them and they deserve it

more of aspity. maybe just more of the Kin in general! i’m not sure what their role would be exactly but you know they would be up for overthrowing a fucking emperor of all things.

aspity when she first meets artemy: so you killed the emperor? artemy: i did n- aspity: nice. do you want to kill another? artemy: ... i mean. maybe??? i have a plague to stop and a murder to investigate but maybe???

is there a polyhedron in this? probably. not sure what role it would play but it Sure Would Be There

that’s about it that i’ve got so far tho!! thank you for the ask!

[medea10]

My Review of Rinne

(a.k.a. Kyoukai no Rinne)

How did I get into this anime? Let’s just say the creator of this series, I’m a fan of. Rumiko Takahashi is the creator of this series as well as several other well-known anime series including Ranma ½, Urusei Yatsura, Maison Ikkoku, and my personal favorite InuYasha. That alone was reason for me to get heavily interested from the get-go. But because of the time it came out, I had too much on my plate to pick up one more anime, so I put it on the back-burner for a few years. And despite the mediocre score and listless hype over this, I’m still interested to see what Rin-ne is all about.

As a child, Mamiya Sakura has been different from other children. When she was a child, Sakura ended up in the afterworld and returned to the world of the living after a day of wandering around. After that incident, she gained the ability to see ghosts/spirits. Fast-forward to the present where she’s a high school student and meets a Shinigami named Rinne Rokudou. Rinne is a half-human (which is rare in the afterworld) and works as a Shinigami like his parents and grandmother before him. He can be seen by regular humans, but if he wears a special cloak, he becomes invisible to everyone. This makes it easy to put spirits to rest without being seen by humans!

Both Rinne and Sakura are able to see what others cannot and this often helps Rinne when he takes on a mission. Throughout the series, Rinne ends up taking on random spirits every episode with a cute mascot that often helps him (Rokumon), a love rival (Tsubasa Jumonji), a girl who likes him (Ageha), and several other colorful characters in the human and afterworld. Check out the afterlife. Just be sure to bring your checkbook, nothing’s for free!

BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: Sentai Filmworks is the licensor of this series and by the looks of it, this series has already been released in video formats and has no dub to speak of. So I’m going to assume there will be no dub to this in the future. This is kind of a blessing to me! Because if I’m watching a Rumiko Takahashi series, I would highly prefer hearing the voice actors of Vancouver! That’s right, if this series doesn’t contain Richard Ian Cox, Kelly Sheridan, Brad Swaile, or Brian Drummond, the dub will be scum.

Okay, I admit that’s mean. I grew accustomed to the other Takahashi classics that if this got a dub, I would have flipped if I saw the Texas voice actors on this.

As for the sub…where oh where could Kappei Yamaguchi be? Oh where, oh where could he be? One way or another, we are going to hear him. And we do! BUT, he’s not a main character this time. That honor goes to Kaito Ishikawa. Everything in the last three years has gone to this guy. And who am I to complain? I friggin’ love him in nearly everything he’s in. Yeah, this series does have a lot of familiar voices, including several that have been memorable characters in Takahashi’s other series. Kappei Yamaguchi (who is well known for InuYasha and Ranma) is featured as well as Satsuki Yukino (well known for Kagome on InuYasha) Here’s what you might recognize these folks from.

*Rinne is played by (known for Kiawe on Pokemon SM, Genos on One Punch Man, Mitsuo on Golden Time, Urie on Tokyo Ghoul :re, Sakakibara on Assassination Classroom, and Naofumi on Shield Hero)

*Sakura is played by Marina Inoue (known for Sonia on Pokemon Journeys, Armin on Attack on Titan, Yoko on Gurren Lagann, Jessica on Umineko, Kyouko on Skip Beat, Wataru on Hayate, and Rei on H.O.T.D.)

*Rokumon is played by Hitomi Nabatame (known for Serena’s Mother on Pokemon XY, Yukiji on Hayate, Margery Daw on Shakugan no Shana, Saori on Oreimo, Nanao on Bleach, and Raynare on High School DxD)

FAVORITE CHARACTER: I have a guilty pleasure for Kain’s cat, Suzu. She’s just so care-free that she fucks up at least 98% of the time she’s shown on this show. And I gotta admit that she makes me laugh whenever she’s on the screen.

DISLIKED CHARACTER: You would think I would pick that snot-nosed brat (Shouma) introduced in season two for this list. Or Kain for that matter! Both of these boys annoy the living fuck out of me whenever they’re in an episode. But then Rinne’s father peaks his douchey head in.

Oh wow, horrible parent alert! Sabato Rokudou is Rinne’s father and holy shit what a bloody scumbag. He’s on the same tier as the parents from Hayate the Combat Butler. Yeah, that bad! As we all know, the after-world is a capitalist society and everything has a price. This guy has been stealing his own son’s money since he was a little boy. Add to that, Sabato fills his son with false promises (including meeting his own mother). Even in his current age, Sabato finds ways to steal money from his son when he’s trying to earn means while living in the world of the living. Even putting him in a million yen in debt! And just causing life to be miserable for Rinne whenever he comes by! Tamako, how could you birth such an inconsiderate bastard into being?

Nice to see my prediction from when I wrote my Worst Father’s of Anime list over a year ago came true. Sabato remained a dick-head throughout all three seasons. Amazing! I guess the only nice thing about him is that he’s not going to be in a relationship with Ichigo while she’s still a child.

SHIPPING: So Kyokai no Rinne is following the same protocol as a lot of Rumiko Takahashi’s other animes. So we have the male and female main protagonist that’s going to be the main ship (even though it seems more friend-zoned most of the time). There will be a reoccurring girl character to cause friction between this main ship because she loves the male protagonist. And we have to add several boys after the main female’s heart too.

And just for good measure, let’s add a boy interested in the male lead and a couple of secondary ships that may or may not happen.

Hey, InuYasha and Ranma ½ had the same setup. Rinne is just following suit!

Rinne x Sakura has pretty much setting sail since the end of season two even without a full-on confession from either one of them. Rinne has had feelings for Sakura since season one. Sakura on the other hand, I can’t get a grip on what she wants in terms of a romantic partner. I want to say she’s oblivious to the advances of Jumonji or Ageha’s jealousy, but on the other hand, I feel like Sakura just doesn’t care what happens romantic wise. But the fact that she’s constantly helping Rinne might be a big, fat clue.

Rinne x Ageha is that one-sided ship that you know is never gonna happen (along with Sakura x Jumonji), but it doesn’t stop die-hard shippers from supporting it until their final breaths. I am actually impressed that Ageha doesn’t hold a grudge against Rinne because his father kinda brain-washed Ageha’s sister into giving Sabato money all the time. Several other characters hate Rinne for that alone, yet Ageha is still devoted to loving Rinne.

I do wonder that once Rinne x Sakura are a sure-thing if Jumonji and Ageha are going to hook up.

Rinne x Matsugo was one of the wildest ships I could have imagined. First of all, Matsugo’s debut episode came with a hint of love-hate. But by the end, Matsugo went from hating Rinne over a misunderstanding to going all “Bros before Hoes” on us! After that Matsugo stopped at nothing to get Rinne. Even blowing off the one girl that actually likes this obsessed freak!

Kain x Renge is actually the one ship that doesn’t revolve around Rinne because both Kain and Renge hate Rinne’s guts. Renge likes Kain, but also has to hide some pretty heinous things from him like working for Rinne’s father as a Damashi-shinigami. And as we all know, Kain has a vendetta against Sabato, his family, and anyone affiliated with Damashis due to his own family situation. Kain unfortunately sees Renge as an ally or a friend. He wants her to continue her studies since Kain can’t go to school. Dude ain’t got time for a side-chick! He’s gotta work for a living because his mother gives all their money away to Sabato.

That guy seriously grinds my gears.

RUMIC WORLD EASTER EGGS: Rumiko Takahashi has been around for quite some time and many of her creations have become quite well-known. That’s why when Rinne came in anime form, fans took to the forums to gab about how Ageha is the spitting image of a one-shot villain from InuYasha or that Sakura’s mother has a resemblance of Lum or that Jumonji looks like a modern-day Miroku (minus the perverted charm). Every now and then, we get a special little easter egg shown from Takahashi’s other works. Most notably, Lum shown on the currency and carnival prizes that have a lot of figures from Ranma ½!

My favorite easter egg was of course during a next episode preview where Sabato and Tamako (who are voiced by Kappei Yamaguchi and Satsuki Yukino) end up doing some dialogue that’s…

…You all know what this is…

END OF SEASON ONE: So the final episode, Sakura was able to have something she hasn’t been able to obtain in over 10 years. Three days of peace without having to be bugged by a spirit. As a reminder, Sakura as a child visited the other world and after that experience, she’s been able to see spirits. Tamao gave Sakura some candy to eat so that she would be like every other human around her and not see spirits every waking second.

This couldn’t have come at a worse time for Rinne as he had to take out over 5,000 spirits in the middle of an A-1 run. And because Sakura accidentally opened the barrier containing these spirits, they were trying to come after her. So Rinne had to get rid of all 5,000 (and lose money in the process with special tools). It took three days, but Rinne was able to do that. And because Rinne had his special coat on (where normal humans are unable to see him), Sakura wasn’t able to see him until the candy wore off. Even though Sakura got a whole bag of those candies, she hasn’t used them again.

At the end of the episode, Rinne and Sakura break the fourth wall by announcing that a second season was coming!

SEASON TWO: Oh thank you Jesus, the opening and ending themes aren’t bland bags of genericness like the previous season. Great improvement, especially when you get one of the best singers from Love Live to do the opening theme! Good on you!

Music ranting aside, this season we are introduced to a lot of new characters in the human and spirit world that are going to be seen more often than not. Starting things off, apparently Ageha has a cat employee (much like the relationship between Rinne and Rokumon). Except Ageha and Obero’s relationship is a lot more dysfunctional. Kain also has a cat employee named Suzu. She’s more spazzy compared to Kain’s serious demeanor. Actually, there are several cat characters introduced this series and even a few episodes dedicated to them later on.

One more thing I should mention about this particular season is that we got to see Sakura have a little more growth here. For a while I found her too plain for my taste, but this season we see her become a Shinigami (for a day) and we even get possible love interest with the finale. Now let’s head over to that part.

END OF SEASON TWO: The final two episodes consisted of Rinne being invited to a high school mixer in the Afterworld by a former friend, Matsugo. The thing is Matsugo used to hold a vendetta against Rinne due to a misunderstanding from their childhood. But unlike every other misunderstanding from this series, this one was resolved within an episode or two and Matsugo’s buddies with Rinne again. Actually, Matsugo’s feelings are teetering from childhood friend to full-blown bromance.

How do you get rid of a nuisance who can’t take a hint? Bring Sakura with you to the mixer and have her pretend to be your girlfriend! The big problem here is that Rinne is putting food and money over Sakura. And if you were in Rinne’s shoes, you can see that these two are more important than a girl. Rinne is poor as fuck! If he gets a chance at winning some money or food, absolutely fuck everything else! Unfortunately, Sakura caught wind of all of these ulterior motives and started to question her own relationship with Rinne. And I gotta hand it to Sakura, because if this were an old-school Rumiko Takahashi female protagonist like Akane or Kagome, Rinne would have been destroyed in a matter of seconds. Sakura doesn’t cuss him out or show a resting bitch-face. Actually, she never does! But by the end of this two-parter, Rinne realized that Sakura is pretty important to her, maybe even more than other things.

At the end of the episode, Rinne and Sakura break the fourth wall again by announcing that a third season was coming!

SEASON THREE: Much like the previous season, we’re continuously introduced to new characters that serve some sort of purpose, a new love triangle involving the main or supporting cast, and 2-3 filler stories an episode. However, in the mid-point, we get introduced to 2 new characters that answer some questions that have plagued many of us since the beginning.

You know how nearly every male protagonist of Rumiko Takahashi has a missing mother? Whether it be due to premature demise or she’s a crazy-bitch like in Ranma ½, the mother figure is usually M.I.A. Otome was Rinne’s mother, but she disappeared when he was a baby. Only now, her scythe returns suddenly. Add to that, a mysterious little girl named Ichigo moves into the area (and just like Sakura, she can see spirits).

Long story short, Ichigo is the reincarnation of Otome (Rinne’s mother). I can get over this whole Kikyo/Kagome crap because this is a Rumiko classic. But I just feel ewwie whenever I see Ichigo and Sabato. Thankfully Sabato has no intention of doing anything creepy to Ichigo. He has some standards, so he gets a point with me there. The reason why Otome disappeared was because she wanted to hide her old yearbooks from Sabato, which lead to her being caught up in a stampede of wild animals that lead her to the wheel of reincarnation. And the reason why she was trying to hide these old yearbooks was because she didn’t want Sabato to know the ugly truth.

That she is really two years younger…than her mother-in-law.

Dude…I know Tamako looks extremely young to even be a grandmother…but damn, Otome goes to these lengths to lie about her age.

ENDING: We don’t really get any kind of monumental moment or climax until the very final episode since all of the episodes between Ichigo’s reveal and the finale were mostly just side-stories involving spirits/demons of the day. The final episode had Rinne, Sakura, Renge, and Jumonji taking part of a school festival at Matsugo’s school. But it mostly takes place in a test of courage cave. Apparently this feature is notorious for causing many couples to break up and people can’t turn around otherwise they’re disqualified. But if you make it all the way through, free food! And you know Rinne is not going to turn down a chance to get free food.

But we get another moment much like the end of season two where Rinne has to choose between food and/or money or Sakura. Actually, Rinne ended up choosing Sakura. And unlike a bunch of other pissed off couples, Rinne and Sakura’s relationship (or lack there of) is doing pretty well.

So we end with no love confessions on any front, no happy ending for Rinne in hitting a Shinigami lottery or some crap like that, and no hope in a fourth season.

*sighs*

This was…just an okay anime. I can see why people just think this is okay or mediocre. With me, there were several things that bugged. First of all, I found several things in the anime that felt very inconsistent. Especially when it came to the spirits plaguing the human world! There are some scenes where something out of the ordinary happens and it plays out like you would expect like people freaking out. But then you get these moments where, okay, why are regular humans seeing this? The annoying narrator likes to point out the obvious in literally every episode. Why, didn’t we establish the obvious earlier?

Speaking of the narrator, could you be any more annoying?! How many times are you going to remind us of things in the series? I know there are useful moments with the narrator like when he’s describing all the different items Rinne and other Shinigami use to put a soul to rest. But then there’s this repetitive nature to the narrator where he constantly reminds you of shit you’ve known since episode 1. It’s useful when you want to remind the audience at the beginning of each season, but not every couple of episodes. WE ALL KNOW RINNE CAN’T BE SEEN BY HUMANS IF HE’S WEARING HIS CLOAK! SHUT UP ALREADY!

I’m not sure if the anime covered everything in the manga as I have not picked up the books…yet. I’m sure the manga has gotten a little further with many of these potential ships like Rinne x Sakura to hope that maybe one day we’ll get something from them. I’ve spent a good year and a half trying to grasp at what I really think of Sakura Mamiya. First of all, she’s a huge improvement in the main female role. When you compare her to the other girls from Takahashi’s works like Kagome or Akane (who eat Carnation Instant Bitch every morning), Sakura is quite pleasant.

But then you see Sakura showing no other emotion besides satisfied, meh, and let me put on my surprise face. She hardly ever gets mad. I’m not saying go on a rampage like Kagome when she yells at InuYasha, but for fuck’s sake, tell Rinne off every now and then. Christ-balls, he’s put food and money over you so many times you’ve earned a few yells. And he constantly borrows money from you and you know he’ll never pay you back!

The story is mostly the spirit of the day trope. In later seasons however, we get two or three mini stories an episode dealing with some sort of spirit with no personal growth involving any of the main characters. Rinne gets ahead during the episode, but gets smacked back to where he began and we repeat the same thing in the next episode. So yeah, it got boring when we’re stuck in a slump like that. I even had high hopes in season two when we got that one episode where Sakura was a Shinigami for the day. I thought Sakura was going to evolve a little bit after that, but alas that was not the case. We go right back to the spirit(s) of the day trope!

But I always felt drawn back with several of the colorful characters. I always enjoy Rinne’s grandmother, Tamako. Kain’s cat, Suzu is the silliest thing ever and I love her dearly. Masato will always suck and it’s a joy to watch him fail at everything. And call me a sucker for boys fighting over the girl, but whenever I see Rinne and Jumonji get jealous at each other, I enjoy it. Not on levels like Inuyasha and Koga, but good enough here.

So, I would give it a couple of episodes to make your own decision if you want to drop it or continue watching Rinne.

In the meantime, I’m gonna wait patiently for that InuYasha sequel that’s coming out in October. Thank Arceus Rumiko Takahashi gave us something in 2020.

If you want to check out Rin-ne, all three seasons are available on Crunchyro…

Uh-oh! As of this date and time, Rin-ne is removed (along with 76 other titles) from Crunchyroll’s site. Glad I finished before they got rid of it! Just watch it on HI-DIVE.

Now then! That took a good 18 months to get through. Hopefully the next anime is a lot shorter than that one. What’s next on my Sentai block?

Suffering!

Huh? Does that mean Re:Zero? Or Akame ga Kill?

Nope.

Oh, Made in Abyss! But this looks cute and innocent, how could this possibly be…?! Almost had you all fooled! Looks can be deceiving. Yeah, this anime is gonna hurt.

[wheremytwinwatches]

[Where My Twin Watches]: Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood Episode 13

I’m back! Took a little break to watch Rebellion, mostly recovered from that so I can return to watching this light-hearted tale of whimsy and hahaha no. Onwards with Brotherhood!

Episode 13 - “Beasts of Dublith” Izumi’s talking about Ed seeing “it” and surviving. Ooh, do we get info on Truth this episode? [Izumi]: “Regardless, I can’t accept the decision you made. You’re expelled.” What?! Teacher turns away, tells them to get on a train. Ed just bows and thanks her for everything. ...wow, I’d forgotten how hard this show can hit. Huh, same intro? I thought this was the halfway point of the season, don’t animes usually switch things up at this point? ...at the very least, I’d like them to change the into so I don’t have to see Hughes again at the beginning of each episode YES I’M STILL BITTER. Sig’s seeing them off at the station, saying they should drop by if they’re ever in town again. Sorry buddy, but I don’t thin- [Sig]: “You idiots! You’re so busy pouting you can’t see what your expulsion means; You aren’t her students anymore, so now you’re finally free to speak to Izumi as equals!” Oh. Ohhhh. Ok, so that was her way of ‘graduating’ them. I can see it. [Sig]: “Unless, of course, you’re too chicken to try it.” Suddenly Ed facepalms? There’s something you forgot to do? I thought the point of the trip was to visit your old Teacher. [Sig]: “Don’t let her kill you.” ...Gee, thanks for the advice. Ed gets back to the butcher shop GAH good thing Ed’s quick enough to duck knives. Izumi is not happy to see him again. But the Elric Brothers say that they’ve come looking for a way to get their bodies back, and that they are staying. A staredown commences.

Izumi… relents? Huh, I thought she would have kept this up until you stopped calling her Teacher. Time to talk about “the Truth”! Al didn’t see it, doesn’t even really know what it means. Izumi says he lost his memory from the shock… oh! Yeah, if the cost of what Ed saw was his leg, for Al to lose his entire body as the “toll”? Oh good grief you two, stop talking about how “awful” and “horrifying” it was, you’re scaring the kid. Izumi’s got a lead in an acquaintance who might be able to retrieve the memory. But first, dinner! Eavesdropper! We’ve got a Gollum taking a peek in the window, confirming that Ed can transmute human souls. Oh wow that’s a tail, is this guy part-Gecko? Back at Eastern Command, some old guy with bifocals is playing chess with Roy, expositing that he’s transferring in one week. (Subtitles say) General Grumman is giving the standard platitudes of “it won’t be the same without you”, “I got to relax thanks to your hard work”, ect ect. Hmm, noting that his glasses are consistently shiny, not a good sign. Ooh, that was a flinch, and yup, checkmate. Good job Roy! Grumman plays it off as a “going away gift”, Roy presses this charitable mood. Hello there, Master Sergeant Kain Fuery. Gotta be honest here, I’m still holding the loss of Fuhrer Fury against you, here’s hoping you can be a good enough character to overcome that bias. We’ve also got Warrant Officer Vato Falman, Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda, Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc-

No, not that Jean. And First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye as well. Seems that Roy’s added them to his own transfer, they’ll join him in Central. No objections! [Havoc]: “I’ve got a problem, sir. See, I just started dating this girl and I really like her.” [Roy]: “Dump her.” Wow. Remind me not to go to Roy for relationship advice. What is it you see in this guy again, Riza? Cut to some dude working out with a crude dumbbell. Oh hey it’s Scar! How’s it going buddy? Apparently he’s not supposed to be working out, the Ishvalan kid Rick chides him for aggravating his wounds. He opens the tent for someone else, and Scar looks shocked? [Scar]: “Master!” Ooh, a parallel episode! The Elrics and Scar working with their old teachers! I like these! Master’s talking with Scar now, saying he knows that his student’s been targeting State Alchemists. But regardless of their crimes, such vengeance will only cause further violence. Senseless revenge, feeding a fruitless cycle of death? Man this Master pulls no punches. He tells Scar to end this cycle once and for all- Suddenly two non-Ishvalans poke their heads into the tent, identify Scar and start talking about a bounty. Uh oh. Either Scar’s gonna ignore his Master, or we’ll find out why this guy is called Master even in the subtitles. Third guy is hiding behind some rubble, Ishvalan bystanders yell at Yoki for bringing bounty hunters. Man, another whiny Elric antagonist? Oh yeah, I’m sure that you’ll “rise up” and take your revenge. Total faith in you buddy. Off-topic, do you mind telling me when you plan to face them? I want to know when so I can sell tickets I mean show my support. Scar realizes that he’ll only bring more trouble, however irritating, if he stays there. Yyyyeah, you bounty hunters had no idea who you were messing with. One dismembering and face-grab later, Scar doesn’t even bother with Yoki, just dons sunglasses once more.

Master tries one more guilt-trip (“Your brother would be sad”), we get a dramatic zoom at Scar’s tattooed arm. Scar just says it’s too late to turn back now, and walks off.

Al’s sweeping outside the butcher shop when a ball of paper’s thrown at his feet. A note from Gecko-Man, Bido? Oh wow a place called “Devil’s Nest”, I’m sure it’s a quite reputable business. Some guys sniffs and jumps down to join Bido and a lady in the street, to greet Al as he walks up. A meeting? Ooh, did you guys try to blackmail Al? This can only end well. Nose-Man (Dolcetto) tries to get Al to come with them, one “Ooh, I’m just a widdle kid” act later… Uh oh! So while Dolcetto went down like a punk, Tatoo-Lady (Martel) took the advantage to get inside Al’s armor, slow him down for an older guy (Roa) to show up for a turn and wrestle the armor to the ground. [Al]: “You people aren’t human, are you?” No, really? What gave it away, the guy with a giant gecko tail? [Greed]: “Good guess! They’re Chimeras… And they happen to work for me.” Wait, Greed? Aw crap it’s another Goth! The Terminator from the intro, no less! So Al’s in some sort of basement now, Martel still keeping him controlled from inside the armor while Greed is starting some sort of pitch. So wait, how is Greed connected to the rest of the Goths? I can see he has the Uroboros tattoo on his hand like the others, but I’m getting a different vibe from him. Al asks what they really are, they can’t be Chimera’s because the only “talking Chimera” we’ve seen before was something I really don’t want to remember. Greed just says to not believe everything the government says. Martel’s part-snake, Roa was… cow? Ok. Throw in a lizard (still gonna call him gecko), a crocodile, and a dog. Man, Dolcetto’s not having a good time this episode. As for how these Human-Chimeras are possible, Greed says that they were created by the military. But he’s even more uncommon than they are: he’s a Homunculus. Wait, a Homunculus? Are you sure you’re using the right term there? I can understand Chimera, a mix of species, but my understand of Homunculi is that they’re mini-humans, basically familiars. Oh ok, so apparently the definition of a Homunculus in Brotherhood is a more general “artificially created human”. Flashback to Baby!Elrics studying alchemy, raising the point that yeah that’s Human Transmutation isn’t it? Al is really upset by this claim, saying that it’s just an unproven theory. So Greed says he’ll prove it SWEET LETO WHAT THE TRUTH ok Roa just went Thor on Greed’s skull, the corpse falls. But Al barely has time to ask what the heck that was for when the body raises a hand in a “wait a moment” gesture, and red sparks fly as Greed reforms good as new. Huh. So we’ve already know that the Goths are hard to put down (knife to the forehead), but to completely regenerate after your brain is splattered? Yeah, this is gonna be tough. So, back to why they’ve captured Al? Oh, that’s why? Sure Greed’s got a body that can recover from normally fatal injuries, but he still “dies”. Meanwhile, he’s got a moving, talking suit of armor right here! A body that never dies… Now this is really interesting, looking at two concepts of immortality: a regenerating organic form, or an unchanging metal form. Transhumanism, ho! Still, I don’t think that this is a form of “immortality” that you want, Greed. You want the finer things in life? Get yourself stuck in armor like Al, and you lose your sense of touch and taste. And you don’t strike me as the kind of guy who’s willing to give those up. Greed’s pushing to know how Al got his soul in the armor, Al truthfully says that he can’t remember how and that it wasn’t him who did it. So Greed’s gonna have to talk to the original caster. [Ed]: “Now where’d a seven-foot tall suit of armor run off to?” Bido tries to make Ed pay to know where his brother is. Bido gets used to open the basement door. Al tells Ed that Greed’s a Homunculus (“Hey! Way to ruin it.”), and that he might be able to help them with their body problem. But Greed shows off his Uroboros tattoo, which he has to know that Ed recognizes. Greed says that “they don’t talk much anymore.” A falling out? Greed makes his pitch: He’ll teach them how to make a Homunculus (to transfer their souls to?), if they teach him how to transfer a soul. “Classic equivalent exchange.” EEC: 8 Finally, I get to update that count! Given how much the phrase made Tephi snicker I thought I’d be hearing it more often, best I can tell the last time was… ugh, Tucker. Moving on. Well of course you don’t understand why Al would want his body back, Greed. You don’t know the limitations. [Greed]: “You’re joking, right? You don’t need to eat, you don’t need to sleep, you don’t even need to use the toilet! Sounds great to me!” Yup. Ed’s pissed. Greed can only applaud his monologue. There you go Dolcetto, go ahead and get Worfed. But Greed puts up much more of a fight, going into the terminator mode from the intro, blocking all of Ed’s attacks as an Ultimate Shield. So Ed’s basically fighting MGR’s Armstrong, then? “Homunculus, son!” [Greed]: “Oh. You’re one of those guys. You don’t care if someone beats the crap out of you, but if someone lays a hand on a family member you completely freak out. What a waste… you lose your temper like this and you’re gonna lose my information and your brother.” But Ed thinks he still has a chance. Until Greed shows that he was holding back so he didn’t have to cover up his pretty face. Sig’s found the dropped broom, evidence that the boys have gone missing. Because Leto forbid they skip out on their chores and invoke Izumi’s wrath. A passerby says they were seen going into a bar called the Devil’s Nest. In said bar, Ed is [SUFFERING IN PAIN], literally breaking his automail on Greed and getting thrown around. But he has a plan? Oh yeah, Alchemy! He shorts out Greed’s Ultimate Shield to bust up his organic hand, Greed grows it back quickly and remarks that that was bizarre. Another attack, and stalagmites to the chest! Chemistry for the win! Since Greed told Ed that he was human, Ed knew that a third of his body was made of carbon. He figured that Greed was using that to make his shield, just rearranging the atoms. So all Ed had to do was rearrange them right back, graphite instead of diamond. Alright! Big Letodamn Hero entrance by Izumi! Who throws a mook at Ed and yells at him for not putting the broom away. [Greed]: “Oh give me a break. Don’t tell me you’re going to try and start anything, lady. It’s no fun fighting a woman.”

Time for Housewife Beatdown! *credits* ...Damn it! 

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

Superior Spider-Man #17-19, 23, 27-32 and Superior Team-Up #5, #7 Thoughts...Sorta

Because of the 2099 event coming up I have ambitions (and lord knows if I will succeed) of re-reading the 2099 centric stories published in the 2010s, chiefly Peter David’s Spider-Man 2099 solo-books. I never actually finished reading that stuff nor did I finish writing posts for each issue/arc but I’m willing to try again.

It’s been so long though and now the stuff has been collected I thought it’d be best to not simply pick up where I left off but both refresh my memory and be more of a completionist about it.

Hence I decided to skim  the Superior issues featuring Miguel O’Hara and to a lesser extent Alchemax with a mind towards the scenes featuring both. This is both to save me time (no pun intended) and because you know...fuck Superior.

As such this is far from comprehensive and I’m likely missing information but for the sake of completion I’m making these posts.

So first of all I’m not going to overly critique the inherent concept of Superior, Otto’s characterization, or anyone else’s characterization (sans 2099 relevant characters); especially as they relate to the Superior concept. It’s shit. I’ve said that endlessly before. If you are chomping at the bit to hear specifics regarding these issues then all I shall say is Slott writes Otto as cartoonish with Saturday Morning style villain dialogue whilst Yost in Team-Up, just like virtually EVERY writer sans Slott to handle the character, did better.

NO ONE hearing Otto talk as Spider-Man should be fooled into thinking he’s the real Spider-Man because he doesn’t sound anything like he did before he changed his outfit, started using more violent methods, employed supervillains as part of his Superior Six, had 4 metal arms come out of his back and had a hold gang of henchmen at his beck and call. But in spite of that at least Yost’s dialogue was more nuanced. Whilst it sounds like something Otto would say it also sounds like the Peter Parker Spider-Man merely skewed. He’s more condescending, egotistical and bluntly insulting than Peter ever was but he also doesn’t sound like a middle aged man from a 1960s comic book.

This brings us to the dialogue in general in fact. As a fan of the MC2 universe and older comics I ENJOY older style dialogue...in MC2 stories or older comics. The MC2 universe was it’s own off to the side sandbox that was deliberately trying to evoke the Silver Age, but it could break from that when appropriate. And older comics were just written by the standards of the time. Slott though his dialogue was written if anything in a more antiquated style than what the MC2 usually went for. Seriously all he’d need is to throw in some old fashioned words and social attitudes and it’d be ripped from the 1960s.

In a mainstream, main universe set title the dialogue style should be reflective of the times, whilst obviously avoiding the bad stuff regarding modern dialogue. One of my frustrations with many modern comics is that characters will speak outloud because modern standards dictate that thought balloons for anyone who isn’t the lead character of the story are bad for some asinine reason. On that front I do give Slott credit as he avoids this. He has no problem giving any character he wants internal thoughts and even still makes the lead, Otto, stand out as he has thought captions not thought balloons like everyone else. It’s just literally the word choices he makes that’s the problem. It’s inorganic even by comic book standards and is overly exposition laden. This is where editorial boxes or the recap pages could help out by getting that exposition out of the way. But instead we need to explain a story from over 20 issues earlier twice across 2 issues or alternatively just take it on faith the reader remembers the stories.

It doesn’t help that he inconsistently will use the third person narrator once in a blue moon.

The dialogue also impacts upon the characterization because frankly Miguel and Tyler Stone are...off...

In fact a lot of the characters besides Otto feel rather bland and samey because they are just actors in the plot that is being told and nothing more. Miguel is distinct for little reason beyond his use of future slang. Now I’ve only read the first trade of Spider-Man 2099 so maybe some of these terms pop up later but if Slott invented ‘bithead’ and ‘jammit’ it’s cause for cringe. The larger issue though is that Miguel’s status quo is set up by Slott but not his you know...personality. Okay in fairness he gets across Miguel has a little bit more edge to him than the regular Spider-Man and is not as prone to the same kind of humour in battle. But the latter is likely less Slott getting the character and more him just writing him pretty generically. The sarcasm, the arrogance, the sardonic aspect of Miguel is totally absent.

This is a problem if you were a 2099 fan showing up to see your fav or if this was intended as set up for a spin-off which it absolutely was. I mean shouldn’t set up for a spin-off character give you an impression of their personality. Shouldn’t you want to follow the character as opposed to the admittedly interesting situation the character is in?

But that’s Slott all over. He’s awful on characters 99% of the time but he’s good on concepts 50% of the time. The initial 2099 arc is a great microcosm of this.

Miguel wants to avert Alchemax’s evil influence in the future but we are merely TOLD that it is evil but see little evidence to corroborate that. He is willing to destroy himself, his grandfather and his family lineage to do that but then he has a change of heart. The set up for that change of heart is briefly presented and we smash cut to after it has already happened, we see none of the internal gears turning to demonstrate his mind changing, not even a quick panel of his eyes narrowing or his brow furrowing.

O the flipside (again no pun intended) though I genuinely adore the idea that Liz Allan and Norman Osborn in effect founded Alchemax and the involvement of Tiberius Stone and the conundrum of Miguel needing to protect him. In fact Tiberius comes off as one of the more interesting characters in this. I liked how he deduced his own relevance to the future and was just a sleazy asshole.

Another thing compromising the introduction of Miguel is his presentation.

The arc is rather bewildering because it introduces functionally an alternate version of the original Spider-Man 2099 but also takes it on faith you already know about Spider-Man 2099 in the first place.

Which frankly wasn’t a reasonable presumption.

Like okay sure people know OF Spider-Man 2099 because if you are a comic book or Spider-Man fan long enough your pick up there was a future version of him sooner or later, it’s just plain osmosis. And he’d been featured in two video games in the then recent past.

But not everyone plays video games, watches Let’s Plays, or would have read comics from 20 years ago, especially considering the 2099 stories haven’t even been collected in trade yet. Hell the last time A version of Spidey 2099 appeared it was in 2009 and was a distinctly different version altogether.

So Miguel’s reintroduction should’ve been handled differently, the first shot of him in action should have been the Stegman splash page not him preparing to leap off into action, we should’ve seen his supervision in action instead of just being told about it, we should’ve had his other abilities demonstrated to us. I mean I  know what they are and how they work for the most part but how would someone who’s a new/unfamiliar fan have a clue?

Perhaps the worst example of this is the fact that Slott’s stories, both in the initial 2099 arc and later, reference Miguel and Peter meeting before. There is no further exposition, there is no editorial caption referring to when this occurred (in the initial arc anyway), you are just supposed to accept this has happened before. That is until Superior #32 but more on that in a moment.

But even for new readers this is bewildering. Newer fans might in their head’s wonder if this is referencing the Edge of Time or the Shattered Dimensions video games, which it definitely isn’t because those are clearly not canon to Peter Parker. Older fans like myself might immediately jump to the Spider-Man Meets Spider-Man 2099 one shot from the mid 1990s. But that’s never explicitly referred to until Superior #32 which was published not just after Superior wrapped up but in fact after Miguel’s solo-book had been launched!

More confusingly  IIRC the one shot factors into the original 2099 series so it shouldn’t apply to this alternate version of Miguel and indeed the marvel.wiki lists the one shot as featuring the original Miguel NOT the one starring in these stories. Much like Spider-Girl #10 Slott decided to canonize something he had no business canonizing.

Anyway one final little criticism I have of these stories in terms of writing is that Miguel helped create Spider Slayers using future technology (why would you fuck up the timeline like that??????) and he was able to deduce Otto wasn’t the true Spider-Man. How the fuck can a guy from the future who met Peter Parker ONCE and very briefly tell Superior Spidey is an imposter but Aunt May, Kaine and Mary Jane can’t?

Because contrivance thy name is Slott.

Let’s briefly discuss Superior Team up and Superior #32.

Miguel’s involvement is essentially meaningless in the former and he’s absent from the latter but credit where credit is due Slott did give us a fun little jaunt through the 2099 future...which is not the setting of Miguel O’Hara’s solo book so you know...that was kind of pointless beyond setting up Spider-Worst (not my joke but it’s appropriate). I have little else to say on the issue beyond that seeing more murdered Spider-Heroes sickens me.

Finally let’s talk art.

These books were drawn by Ryan Stegman (Superior #17-19), Marco Checchetto (Superior Team-Up), Humberto Ramos (Superior #23) and Giuseppe Camuncoli (Superior #27.NOW, #28-31).

Ramos is Ramos which is to say anatomically offensive though seeing him briefly draw Miguel wasn’t too bad. Camuncoli was better but I’ve never liked his style. True he got better but still not great.

Stegman meanwhile I think was good. Now this is 2013 Stegman. His RYV, Venom and Absolute Carnage work runs rings around his work back then and before that. It’s very stylized but it’s still good. In fact the stylized look of it works for the concept behind the series. Characters look darker, edgier, in a way uglier and somewhat caricatured which fits in a series about a villain. His double page spread for Miguel though looks awesome, one of the all time great images of the character.

Checchetto meanwhile was the stand out. His work just look gorgeous to look at but it was still evoking a darker aesthetic it fit the idea of a book about a villain very, very well.

Not much to say about these issues. I am debating if I’m going to make a similar multi-issue post when I skim through the Miguel parts of Spider-Verse since I never posted about them back when it was happening, but we will see.

So I recommend reading these?

No. No I do not. I recommend flipping to the pages of Miguel in costume and looking at the art but that’s it.

[lechevaliermalfet]

Vae Victis! – A Look Back at Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain

It was the mid-1990s.  We were in the fifth generation of video game consoles, and gaming as a medium was eager to prove that it had grown up.

This had been going on before the fifth generation, of course.  The Sega Genesis sold itself on its contrast to the status quo.  “Sega does what Nintendon’t,” and all that.  Sega’s whole image was bound up in being the cool kid, the one who’d outgrown all those pokey “kiddie” games like Super Mario Bros. or Kid Icarus or Mega Man.  Sega fans played games like Mortal Kombat and Eternal Champions.  Even a mascot game like Sonic the Hedgehog had a kind of snide adolescent streak to it; leaner, meaner, and less patient.   Nintendo themselves had to butch up a little, even.  When their bloodless version of the first Mortal Kombat got outsold by Sega’s, which kept all the gore – despite otherwise being technically superior in every measurable way – they relaxed their standards and left all the blood and fatalities intact for the second and third games, and saw a jump in sales accordingly.  

The 90s were in part a decade of cynicism and ironic detachment.  Sincerity tended to be frowned upon as being kind of silly and naive, or else a cover for motives less savory.  Strong skepticism was the default mode, and in fiction, anti-heroes were all the rage.

Which brings us to Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain, described by its developers as a Legend of Zelda “for adults”.

Of course, any self-described adult who can’t bear to play a Legend of Zelda game because they feel it’s not grown-up enough needs to sit down and re-assess their idea of adulthood, and how secure they are in it.  If a tolerance for violence (if not a craving) is all it takes, then I was an adult at about eleven, when I was single-handedly mowing down whole armies of Nazis in Wolfenstein 3D.

But those were the times, and that’s how Blood Omen got pushed.  Which is unfortunate, because it misses the more thoughtful parts of the game’s story that actually did make it material mostly for adults.

“...the first act in my theatre of Grand Guignol!”

We begin in the world of Nosgoth, and if there’s a made-up fantasy word that screams “dark supernatural fantasy” more than that, I haven’t heard it.  Our main character is Kain, a nobleman caught out at night in a town where he can’t find an inn or tavern to stay for the night.  He is cornered by assassins and murdered, whereupon he goes to hell.  Or at least, we can assume it’s hell; I don’t think even a death metal band’s idea of heaven involves being cuffed to twin posts overlooking a literal lake of fire with a sword stuck through you.  Anyway, that’s where Kain is, cursing the fact that he can’t get revenge.  Which seems a little warped, on the surface of things.  You’d think if you were stuck in hell, then getting out, however impossible, might seem more important than getting back at the people who killed you.  But if you’re the kind of person who winds up in hell after being murdered, I suppose it stands to reason that your priorities may not be in order.

While Kain is in hell, lamenting his impotent rage and generally ignoring all the fine mid-90s CG scenery, he is approached by a necromancer named Mortanius.

The necromancer offers him a way back to the world of the living, and thus a chance at revenge.  Eager to oblige his overdeveloped sense of wrath, Kain takes him up on the offer, and fails to consider that there are only a few different ways, traditionally, that a dead person can cross back through the veil.  And none of them really involve returning to life exactly as you were.

Kain rises from his grave as a vampire, stronger than he ever was in life, and only too happy to hack up his assassins when he encounters them not far from the site of his crypt.  However, as he comes down from his vengeance-high, he hears a voice in the back of his mind – Mortanius’s voice, in fact – suggesting that his assassins were “the instruments of your murder, not the cause”.  Mortanius then urges him to seek out the Pillars to find the real reason for his murder, and its true culprits.

We need to rewind a bit.

IN THE BEGINNING, there were the Pillars of Nosgoth (in fact, “Pillars of Nosgoth” was the game’s working title for a while). Rooted who knows how deep in the earth below, and reaching up to the clouds, the Pillars are a structure that should be physically impossible.  They are somehow both integral to the natural order of the world, and also the embodiment of certain elemental principles. There are nine of them, embodying – in no particular order – conflict, energy, states (of being, not political), dimensions, death, nature, time, the mind, and balance.  Each Pillar has its guardian, a human endowed with powers according to the Pillar’s defining principle, and tasked with overseeing that Pillar’s particular province.  

A good while back in the past (how long is not detailed in this game, but probably centuries) there was a genocidal crusade of sorts against vampires, who were evidently a serious scourge of some kind.  In fact, the game opens on a view of a field – practically a forest – of stakes, with a vampire impaled on each.  Vlad Tepes would be proud.  This crusade was ordered by the Circle of Nine (the collective group of Pillar guardians), and carried out by the fanatical religious order known as the Sarafan Brotherhood.

Monsters that they are, the vampires did not take this well.  One of their number, an elder vampire named Vorador, decided to strike back.  Vorador was by this point in his unlife no longer quite human looking, with mottled grey skin (later series installments would make this varying shades of green), odd three-clawed hands, and giant bat-like ears. Blood Omen never elaborates on the reason for this difference.  At any rate, he singlehandedly stormed the citadel of the Pillar guardians while most of the Sarafan brotherhood were away (presumably looking for more vampires to stake), and wound up killing several of them (one of the sequels gives the number as six).  In the process, he even managed to beat down Malek on his way out, perhaps the greatest warrior among the Sarafan, and the one specifically tasked with safeguarding the Circle.

For screwing up his one job, Malek was punished by being made to do that job for eternity.  It might seem inadvisable to take the guy who failed to guard you and then make him your guard forever, but it helps if you rip his soul out of his body and bind it to his armor, thus making him a sleepless, tireless, unfeeling, and ever vigilant warrior fueled by pure wrath.  Which is what they (or rather, Mortanius) ultimately did.  At some point between this time and the present day of Blood Omen, Malek became the guardian of the Pillar of Conflict, so evidently he was fit for his role in the end.

Now we fast-forward a bit, to a point just moments before Kain’s birth. In fact, later games place this at the exact moment of that birth.

Somewhere around thirty years before Kain’s murder outside a nameless tavern in a random town, Ariel, the guardian of the Pillar of Balance, is murdered.  This is bad news for all the usual reasons, and also one or two unusual ones.  It turns out that her lover is the guardian of the Pillar of the Mind, the mentalist Nupraptor.  Her murder drives him insane, and being a telepath (among other things), his insanity infects the guardians of the other Pillars as well. This turns them from their usual purpose of upholding the natural balance, and instead sets them to destroying it.  This in turn corrupts the Pillars, symbiotically connected to their guardians, turning them from pristine white to a pitted and cracking grey.  With both the Pillars and their guardians respectively corrupted and insane, the natural order of things begins to fall apart.  Bad news all around.

Blood Omen is somewhat unusual in that it’s one of the few probably rare instances in fiction where a woman is stuffed into the fridge at the beginning of the story, and in order to drive the villain to extremes of behavior.

So.

Now we have Kain, in the present of our story, given to understand that his death was in some way connected with the Pillars and their corruption.  He makes his way to the Pillars, where he meets Ariel’s restless spirit.  She’s the one who lays out for him part of the business about her murder and Nupraptor’s madness, and the threat posed to the world by it all.  Kain is only interested in a cure for his vampirism (now that he’s had his vengeance, he wants no part of this undeath business), but Ariel persuades him that his best bet is to deal with the corruption of the Pillars.  So Kain storms off to go take care of Nupraptor, and ultimately to cleanse the Pillars by severing their connection to their now-insane guardians, solving the problem of their corruption by reference to his sword.  Go with what you know.

It’s at this point that Kain’s personal arc begins to unfold, as he becomes increasingly alienated from humanity, both the species and the concept.  While initially at odds with his vampirism, Kain spends the story coming to grips with the hypocrisy and corruption of human civilization, all the while becoming more and more comfortable with the seeming monstrosity of his new existence.  This is a matter of some necessity.  He has things he needs to do, he has to stay alive to do them, and so a certain amount of blood-drinking and slaughter seems inevitable.  

In his travels, he comes across Vorador’s manor, situated deep in a swamp teeming with monsters.  Kain seeks his help to destroy Malek.  Vorador, for his part, spends the encounter being lordly and largely dismissive of Kain’s quest.  He advises the fledgling vampire that meddling in mortal affairs is nothing but bad news.  Better to sit back and sate one’s hunger – or thirst, in this case – and let the mortal world turn as it will.  Humans are to be preyed on, not helped or manipulated or otherwise gotten involved with.  Best to stay above such passing concerns.  Nevertheless, he takes a liking to Kain, and gives him his ring to summon him at need.

Say a word often enough, and it starts to lose its sense of meaning.  Actions likewise lose significance with repetition.  They become rote.  And as time wears on, Kain seems to begin making a turn.  There’s a certain honesty in being a monster.  You always know what you are, and you always know how other people see you.  Kain may sneer at Vorador’s decadence when they meet, but at least the elder vampire is never less than one hundred percent honest about what he is.

And as Kain goes on, it begins to seem that Vorador was right.  So much of Kain’s and the world’s difficulties seem to stem from the selfishness, greed, shortsightedness, self-absorption, and general malice of the people he runs up against.  Eventually, he winds up accidentally sparking a second genocidal crusade against his own kind.  This has mostly to do with him traveling back in time to kill a man in the past who would grow to become a tyrant in his current era.  This mistake no doubt has its roots in his not having not grown up in a world with a whole sub-genre of fiction concerned with the merits or otherwise of traveling back in time to kill Hitler.

We will have such fun with time travel as the series goes on, let me tell you.

The game ends by offering the player a choice.  Kain’s efforts to cleanse the Pillars and restore balance to the world have made him the new guardian of the Pillar of Balance.  Yet, like all other Pillar Guardians slain at his hand, he himself is corrupt, and must die to complete the task.  So the player is asked: Will Kain willingly sacrifice himself for the greater good of Nosgoth, or will he refuse the sacrifice and choose to live in an increasingly broken and corrupt world.

The sequels take the second ending as canon, and honestly, it’s hard to argue.  This isn’t a story about hope springing eternal, after all.  The few people in it who are unambiguously good are either killed (Ariel) or largely ineffectual (King Ottmar, who comes to prominence briefly toward the end of the story).  The player may feel differently, but there’s little reason to believe that Kain would.  Proud, haughty, vindictive, wrathful, and growing ever more cynical and mistrustful of the motives of those around him, tired of being used as a tool for other’s schemes...  Why would he choose to sacrifice himself?

And so, canonically, we close on a shot of Kain sitting on a throne at the base of the Pillar of Balance, with it and all the other Pillars lying in a broken ruin around him.  He drinks from a goblet, and muses that Vorador was right after all: “Vampires are gods – dark gods – and it is our duty to thin the herd.”

The End.

“Nothing is free.  Not even revenge.”

So that’s Blood Omen as a story.  What about as a game?

On the balance it’s kind of uneven.  

On a technical level, it’s fairly impressive.  In its time, it stood as a testament to the potential quality of two-dimensional graphics in gaming, even as the entire medium was leaping into the third dimension, ready to ditch and decry anything made in 2D as inferior. The result from a technical standpoint is that Blood Omen has in some ways aged better than a lot of other games of its vintage, including its first sequel.  

But then you actually play the thing, and see where it sort of falls apart.

Let’s get the easy part over with, shall we?  The load times in Blood Omen are godawful, just the worst possible combination of long and frequent. It seems almost like a joke at times: “Really?  We’re loading again?  It was one fucking room!”  Were it not for the fact that it began development as a totally unrelated game, I would strongly suspect that the sequel, Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver, used its data-streaming technology to avoid loading times altogether purely as a response to this criticism.  I still think that may be the case.

Once we dig past the issue of loading times, though, the game reveals other issues.

There are good ideas on display here.  Let’s start with that.  The game has a day-and-night cycle, and while you can walk around during the day, you deal less damage (and take more) while the sun is up.  Water is like the touch of acid to a vampire, and any time you’re in it, you’ll take constant damage.  Rain and snow will likewise damage you, and while there are power-ups that are supposed to eliminate this problem, I’m not sure they actually work.  At least, not on the PC version of the game, which is what I’ve mostly played.  

The game also requires that Kain drink blood periodically.  His health naturally drains very slowly, but constantly, so you always have to be on the lookout for a way to top yourself off.  There are some more abstract health restoration items, as well as a consumable item you can use, called the Heart of Darkness (this item will become obscenely important in later installments).  However, the game is structured such that most of Kain’s health restoration will have to come from either enemies or, more often, helpless innocents.  This ties nicely into the game’s theme of alienation from humanity, though the way the game often presents these situations –random strangers chained to walls all over the world, for no apparent reason – seems a little odd at times.  And it has interesting ideas about different creatures having blood that might actually be harmful to Kain, or inflict him with a long-term poison.

In addition to the graphics looking nice (the CG cutscenes are definitely of their time, but the in-game sprite work and lighting effects are quite nice), the game has a great soundtrack, dark and moody and ominous. And the voice work is superb.  All character interactions are handled with voiceover rather than on-screen text, and the cast knocks it out of the park.  Not just “good for the mid-90s video game voice acting”, but great, period.

The puzzle-solving is a little lackluster, though.  For something pitched as a “grown-up Legend of Zelda”, its puzzles largely consist of pulling levers and pushing buttons, and navigating mazes. Which is fine, but again, any game that’s going to self-consciously compare itself to The Legend of Zelda needs to bring its A game, especially with its puzzle-solving.

The game does offer you a lot of tools to use, in the form of different weapons, spells, and magical items.  But a lot of these boil down to more inventive yet questionably practical ways to kill enemies.  And considering that setting up a selection of these items for immediate access involves going back and forth to the inventory menu (requiring a load time both ways), it’s easier to just stick with your weapon and a handful of the most commonly used spells and items and call it a day.

Weapons themselves are another problem.  You’ll find that your iron sword from the very beginning of the game is the most generally useful. The mace will let you stun human enemies to drink their blood after just two hits, but it lacks the crowd-control effect of the sword, and also lacks the stunning effect on the non-human enemies that make up the bulk of your later-game foes.  It’s also useful for knocking down certain stone barriers, but these are few and far between, and necessary for progress only very rarely.  The twin axes let Kain cut down trees barring his path, and also let him cut down enemies by spinning like a saw blade… but this means you’ll frequently kill enemies before you have a chance to drain them.  The flaming sword burns enemies alive and leaves only ashes, preventing you from drinking blood that way.  And then the final weapon, the Soul Reaver (also an item of incalculable importance later in the series), deals massive damage as long as you have magic power to fuel it.  But while thus empowered, it detonates the enemies it kills, making them impossible to drain.  And when not empowered, it’s only as damaging as the iron sword, but slower and more awkward.

Combat in general gets frustrating at times, thanks to the iffy hit detection.  One enemy might walk right through your sword swing, while another you could swear was out of range will register a hit.  It never becomes a total deal-breaker, but it’s a point of frequent irritation as you go.

Let’s have another positive: Kain also gains the ability to transform into various other states as the game goes by.  In his wolf form, he can leap over certain obstacles, but his attack in this form has no combo ability and a long wind-up, making him vulnerable.  He can use his bat form to fast-travel between beacons and certain landmark locations, while his mist form allows him to walk on water without taking damage, as well as cross certain barriers without opening the door.  There are also two disguises he can use.  One transforms him into a peasant, while the other turns him into a human-looking version of himself so that he can pass as a nobleman.  The use of both of these is largely situational, required in a very small number of situations and then mostly pointless outside of them.

But perhaps the thing that stands out the most is its linearity.

This is to some extent mandated by the story.  Unlike The Legend of Zelda, to which this game invites much comparison, Blood Omen’s story is very much at all times front and center.  A Zelda game will leave you with bits of story here and there, and largely leave you to explore or puzzle your way forward or dick around in town or otherwise do your own thing for long stretches of time.  The story in one of those games is the starting point of the experience, a backdrop against which you play out the adventure.  Hyrule is to some extent defined by that openness, with its plains and deserts and vast forests and so on.  

Blood Omen lacks this.  Its story is the entire point and purpose of the game. The path forward is always clear and rarely has room for deviation or discovery.  There may be things hidden off to the side, but these tend ultimately to be cul-de-sacs, connecting to nothing else.  This is even subtly expressed in the game’s environments: lots of indoor areas, caves, narrow trails, canyons, and so on.  There’s little opportunity to go off the beaten path.  Blood Omen’s pathways not only discourage exploration, they often disable it. This is not your experience to own; it is Kain’s story for you to be told.

I feel like in story terms, that’s ultimately the difference.  Legend of Zelda’s story always exists to serve the game that Nintendo crafts.  Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain’s game exists to serve the story.

And just to be clear, none of this is bad at all.  It’s every bit as valid in terms of game design and mechanics as any given Zelda.  But if you’re going to compare your game to The Legend of Zelda and then fail to do the most essentially Zelda things in it – not just do them poorly, but not do them at all, missing the point entirely of what a Zelda game is about – then it’s worth commenting on.  I like Blood Omen, but I had to get used to thinking of it on its own terms.  The Zelda comparisons are easy to make. Even without the developers making them, the look and structure of the game seems to invite them.  

Like a good book, Blood Omen is a (mostly) straight shot from start to finish.  Its linearity is what allows it to control the story, to unfold its plot and explore its themes at a pace of its choosing.  The game to some extent revels in its edginess, but to be honest, it was perfect for me at the time.  I was sixteen when I first played the game.  Sixteen, and a bit of a loner with an odd and private (but intense) interest in vampires.  It was probably the perfect game for me at the time.  And it’s still ultimately enjoyable today, if you take it as what it is.  Not as a Legend of Zelda game for adults, but as a decent action-adventure game with a good story and top-notch presentation.  If you don’t mind the linearity and the relentlessly dark and sometimes disturbing story, it’s just about perfect.

Post-script the First: Likelihood of Re-release, and Current Availability

Eeeehhhhhhhhhh...

Here’s the problem: Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain was originally dreamed up and created by Silicon Knights and published by Crystal Dynamics (who also had a hand in the development, late in the process), with distribution to be handled by Activision.  Crystal Dynamics eventually got full ownership of the Legacy of Kain brand, and used it to make the first sequel to Blood Omen, titled Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver.  Silicon Knights was against this, but had less deep pockets than Crystal Dynamics, so they were ultimately the losers of the resulting court battle over the affair.  The lone bone thrown to them was that Crystal Dynamics had to acknowledge in the game that Soul Reaver was based on characters and ideas created by Silicon Knights.

By the time Soul Reaver rolled around, Crystal Dynamics belonged to Eidos.  Then, in 2005 (not long after the last Legacy of Kain game was published), Eidos was completely bought out by Square Enix, and was mostly refocused on creating western-style games under the Square Enix umbrella.  Crystal Dynamics still exists as a division within Square, where they’ve been making various Tomb Raider games almost exclusively ever since the acquisition.

The problem with any hypothetical remaster or re-release of Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain is that, for several years, it would have required some three-way legal wrangling to determine who really owned the thing, and what they could do with it (if anything), and under what conditions.  

As of about 2014, Silicon Knights ceased to exist (about which more later, because it’s a fun story), but that still leaves the rights an open issue.  Square Enix seems to own the larger Legacy of Kain intellectual property, but there’s the question of ownership regarding Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain specifically, and I’m not sure that question has ever been answered.  Silicon Knights doesn’t exist, but many of its personnel are still around in some capacity, and would presumably have something to say about anything involving it.

Venues like Steam and Good Old Games have released the every other installment in the series digitally (even Blood Omen 2), but nobody’s touched the original game.  Probably CD Projekt Red and Valve don’t have much desire to try unsnarling the ownership and licensing issues themselves, and none of the owners seem all that keen on it, either.

And it will probably stay that way.  The Legacy of Kain series in general has always been pretty solidly in the B tier of video games, from back when there still even was much of a B tier in the first place.  The fanbase for that kind of deliberately overwrought gothic supernatural fantasy was loyal, but never very big, and I’m not sure how much that’s changed.  Moreover, I’m not sure either Square is willing to bank on it having grown in the interim enough to do anything about this first game in the series.  The more time goes by, the less inclination any party has to make anything of the series, especially an early entry whose ownership may be contested. An indirect sequel, and also some kind of MMO, were both in the works at various points.  The MMO vanished after not very long at all on the market, and the indirect sequel never made it out of development.

Legal options for playing Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain are limited.  You can play the original PlayStation version on the PlayStation 1, 2, or 3.  It’s also digitally available on the PS3, although not for the PSP or Vita.  Infuriatingly, it’s one of a small handful of games that can’t even be side-loaded (a process that involves downloading a digital PS1 game onto your PS3, then copying it uninstalled to the Vita).  The PC version, meanwhile, can still be played, though there’s a special program custom-made for it that you’ll have to get in order to install it and run it on modern systems.  And this tends to run a little slow.  Music and sound are fine, it’s just the game actually moves slower than normal.  Or you could install a virtual desktop and play it that way.

Post-script the Second: The Death of Chivalry

So whatever happened with Silicon Knights?  

Well, the story is… not complicated, exactly, but not entirely straightforward, either.

Development of Blood Omen was troubled.  As we would later learn, this was not an especially novel situation for Silicon Knights to be in.  Two of their other big projects later on underwent some turbulence in production.  Blood Omen was originally to be created by Silicon Knights and published by Crystal Dynamics.  Later on, after Crystal Dynamics became part of British publisher Eidos, they were able to somehow leverage this connection to strongarm their way into ownership of the overall Legacy of Kain intellectual property.  They used it to make the first sequel to Blood Omen, titled Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver. This had begun life as a brand-new IP (originally titled Shifter), which helps explain some of the tremendous thematic, aesthetic, and design differences between the two games.  

Silicon Knights later maintained that they’d had their own ideas for a potential Blood Omen sequel, but never got around to it, and after Crystal Dynamics started making their own sequels, Silicon Knights lost interst.  I’m not sure how much of that is real and how much is just so much sour grapes.  Anyway, they went off and did their own thing for a while.  They published the survival horror game Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem for the GameCube, after having signed an exclusivity deal with Nintendo around that time.  It had originally been in development for the N64, but was ultimately moved up to the newer hardware after development delays.  For anyone who’s wondering, Eternal Darkness an excellent game, on the shortlist of must-own GameCube titles, even if you’re not necessarily a fan of survival horror.  It’s not perfect (among other things, you have to beat the game three times to see the true ending), but it does a lot of interesting things.  

They also developed the GameCube remake of Metal Gear Solid (likely under heavy scrutiny and supervision form Konami), dubbed Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes.  Much as I tend to prefer the original version of the game for its restraint (Twin Snakes has a lot of ridiculous high-flying wire-fu maneuvering in its action cutscenes), the remake is worth any Metal Gear fan’s time. Among other things, series creator Hideo Kojima has apparently declared it the canon version of events.  It also saw a re-dubbing of the entire script, since apparently when the original audio was played back at a higher sampling rate, you could hear the traffic in the background, which the ramshackle soundproofing used in the original hadn’t been able to entirely shut out.  The re-dubbed script also has the benefit of having allowing Jennifer Hale and Kim Mai Guest to ditch their put-on accents – Guest’s being particularly irritating, and borderline racist (maybe actually racist; I’m a white dude, and not totally clear on these things).

After this, they moved on to the Xbox 360 with their passion project Too Human, which had been troubled from the beginning.  Its on-again, off-again development cycle spanned a decade and three console generations.  It began development for the original PlayStation, then shifted to the GameCube when the developer did in the early 2000s.  It went quiet for a few years, then resurfaced as an Xbox 360 project that was ultimately delivered in 2008, two years after its projected release on that console.

Too Human was a notorious, news-making flop, and Silicon Knights responded to this failure not simply by pinning the blame on someone else, but by doing that and then actually suing them.  Specifically, they sued Epic Games, from whom they had licensed the Unreal Engine 3 to make the final version of Too Human.  The accusation was that Epic deliberately sabotaged developers who licensed their engine by providing an incomplete product, and that the difficulties stemming from this had caused development delays.  These delays, and the compromises they brought about, were supposedly ultimately responsible for the failure and the financial losses of Too Human.

Epic responded by then counter-suing, which was the beginning of the end for Silicon Knights.

Epic’s counter-suit stated that Unreal Engine 3 was a work in progress, and that they were making it essentially on the fly as they developed the first Gears of War.  The counter-suit further stated that it was readily and openly acknowledged that the engine was unfinished, and that when it was done, it might ultimately not turn out to be useful for the licensees.  Epic’s suit further indicated that these facts were all known and laid out in the licensing contract, and so like all licensees, Silicon Knights knew this when they signed for it.  

But it gets better (which is to say, worse, at least for Silicon Knights). Epic’s counter-suit also included the allegation that Silicon Knights had knowingly and wrongfully copied code wholesale from Unreal Engine 3 and incorporated it into their own engine without permission from Epic.  They had then gone on to use this hybrid engine on other internal projects without the permission of the people they’d cannibalized it from.  

Now, I’m not one to root for a big corporation, even (especially) a game developer.  But Silicon Knights had the misfortune of being run by Denis Dyack, a known con-man, grifter, shady bullshitter, and general ambulatory phallus.  He maybe wasn’t in the same category as a Randy Pitchford or a Bobby Kotick, but that’s less a matter of capacity and more a matter of opportunity.  Given the chance to operate on their scale, I don’t doubt he’d have fit right in with that crowd.  

As far as the court case went, the evidence was overwhelmingly in Epic’s favor. In addition to their own court costs and damages awarded to Epic, Silicon Knights was forced to recall all unsold copies of Too Human and X-Men: Destiny (another game they’d developed with their Unreal Engine 3 hybrid), as well as scrap all projects using the engine, which seems to have been literally everything they had in the works at that point.

So what happened, essentially, is that Silicon Knights sued Epic Games in an effort to offset their losses by making money out of the Too Human debacle somehow, and it backfired so comically that they broke themselves against their opponent.

But their end, one way or another, was probably inevitable in that console generation.  Looking at their release history, there’s really nothing that stands out as a hit or an absolute classic.  Eternal Darkness and Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes were both fine games, this much is true.  But Eternal Darkness was a GameCube exclusive, and the GameCube didn’t sell the way Nintendo hoped.  Meanwhile, The Twin Snakes is certainly nice, but as a remake of a different developer’s game, it has little in the way of originality, and very little of the material can really be said to “belong” to Silicon Knights, since it was someone else’s brainchild right from the start.  

They were never a hugely prolific publisher, with eight games published before they folded, and according to Wikipedia, seven known titles cancelled at various points during their existence.  These cancelled projects included two sequels to Too Human (which had always been planned as a trilogy).  Given the cold reception received by the original, both from critics and consumers alike, that seems questionable.  In for a penny, in for a pound, I guess.  But however you look at it, they didn’t have what you’d call a good ratio of finished to unfinished projects.  And while it’s worth mentioning that many of those unfinished projects were upcoming games they were forced to cancel because they’d been made (or begun) with their illegal Unreal Engine 3 hybrid, the fact is that when your business plan hinges on stealing another developer’s game engine to make your own games, you’re already in a bad place.  

Silicon Knights pretty firmly slotted into the middle tier of video games.  For my money, the middle tier is in some ways the sweet spot.  It’s more high-tech and technically involved than the indie set, yet not so high-budget that developers in it can’t feel free to experiment.  But that middle tier has all but vanished these days. It’s questionable whether Silicon Knights would have hung on long enough to find a spot in it today, even if they hadn’t destroyed themselves going after Epic, just based on the iffy reception of their games.  That’s without considering the general skullduggery it took to keep them going in the first place.  And I also tend to think of X-Men: Destiny as a bad sign.  There’s no shame in work-for-hire; it’s how a lot of major development studios (like Blizzard) started out.  But that’s the key: you start out doing work-for-hire projects to make the money to strike out on your own. Silicon Knights was moving in the opposite direction, and that’s a bad sign.

Vae Victis, indeed.

[something-very-special]

Call Her Back

Probably already a post with this title from the Let’s Play but it’s appropriate.

Thoughts on Replicant up to Ending A (and change):

This game is pretty. I guess it didn’t really hit me because I’ve always thought that the original NIER was pretty, but this game can be very pretty.

This in particular just kind of struck me as I was going across the Northern Plains. It had been dominantly gray, overcast skies up to that point because Part II of the game is meant to be. You know. Bleak. But I walked out onto a bright, sunny day with an expanse of blues skies, the mountains in the backgrounds, the ivy a burst of green growing up the rusted sides of the train tracks and it just kind of hit me that the game can be very pretty.

(Then I got punched out by a Shade.)

It’s definitely not a matter of massive graphical overhaul. The models look much better (getting a good look at the Twins during the finale, they really are beautiful) and I’m sure the environmental poly count is much higher and just overall smoother, and there are little touches here and there and just the capacity for better atmospheric lighting... I mean it all helps. But NIER is a game that’s always had fantastic art direction, making the most out of its budget through atmospheric tuning. There’s something uniquely beautiful about its muted palette and the way it uses its spaces that elevates it beyond the its actual technical limitations. It doesn’t look like an end-of-generation PS4 game, but that’s not an insult; it looks very much like itself from ten years ago, with its solid art direction, but touched up where it matters.

Does the sidequest grind seem... better...? I haven’t really dug into the BEST part of the game (spending 30 hours grinding out weapon upgrades) but I mentioned before my theory about how the sidequest grind is supposed to be carried out across multiple playthroughs and that’s why it sucks. To my surprise I finished Ending A missing only one sidequest (your friend and mine, Life in the Sands), with all of the other ones being more or less... pretty natural? The only thing I really needed to go out of my way for was Memory Alloy but all the other components didn’t really give me the kind of grief I remember from my playthroughs of the original. ‘Grief’ of course being relative to getting the platinum trophy, but my first time through the game I gave up finishing a few outstanding sidequests (specifically, fixing the lighthouse broke me-- I could not find 10 Mysterious Switches!)

Maybe I just got lucky, especially with the Machine Oils. Maybe some weird muscle memory kicked in. I feel like there were a few purchasing options that weren’t open originally, too, to ameliorate some of the grind, but it might also be a case of those options being cost-prohibitive so I just didn’t really acknowledge them... whatever the case the sidequest grind felt overall pretty painless. I dunno!

I really need to know how to manipulate events. For literally seven playthroughs straight of the latter half of the game I always did the keystone quest as Junk Heap (start) - Forest of Myth - Junk Heap (end) - Facade - Aerie. It wasn’t until I did a run with my college roommates and Popola gave me the Aerie letter before the Facade in invite that I realized the Aerie wasn’t actually programmed to be the last event.

Absolutely blew my mind, and ever since I became aware of it, it feels like the game goes out of its way to make sure the Aerie always comes before Facade. When I did my Let’s Play of NIER I kept a save file from the start of the kystone collection so I could re-do the events in case they went ‘out of order’ (according to my headcanon)... which they did. I replayed the latter half of the game again in order to get things the way I wanted them to be, same order, and fortunately it cooperated the second time, but I still don’t understand what the trigger is, if there’s a way to manipulate it, or when the determination is even made.

And then they throw the Little Mermaid into the mix, which I wasn’t expecting (that is, I knew it was added, but I’ve been mostly avoiding spoilers -- and happily, the changes have largely been a delight, I’m so excited for the subsequent playthroughs -- but the way it was posted about made it seem like it would happen after and apart from the keystone quest. Not so, my friends).

The reason for this is just the emotional escalation of each factor of the quest. The Forest of Myth is weird and little else (at this juncture, of course). The Junk Heap is a personal tragedy, but the actual tragedy has already occurred and you’re just experiencing the fallout. Facade is a powerful and personal tragedy that deserves to be experienced later on. The Aerie is a terrible place and nobody misses it it’s an enormous loss and profoundly traumatic for the party, and it feels like the appropriate apex to basically force them to go to the Castle and finish the fight, having already lost far too much.

Also it’s just super weird to me that they see that devastation, they literally wipe an entire settlement off the map, and then the next day everybody’s super excited to go to a wedding.

It also becomes even weirder that you go to Popola post-Aerie and nobody mentions ‘yeah that didn’t go so well’ but coming out of Seafront they have a legitimate conversation about the loss of the ferryman and the people they’re never getting back. I guess that guy had a personality but I still think maybe somebody should mention the smoking crater where people used to be.

Then again it’s legitimately funny to me how basically everybody is just agreed the world is better off without it.

This might also just be an issue of familiarity. Maybe if I’d always ended on Facade, or actually known that they could be swapped out as they are, it wouldn’t feel so weird. I definitely got used to the pacing with the Aerie at the end and I feel like I got into a debate with somebody about how it’s more appropriate for Facade to come last so this might just be a personal thing. But it’s still a personal thing and I’m still vaguely irritated I can’t figure out how it works.

Anyway I blew up the Aerie So that’s that problem taken care of.

I feel like the ambiance surrounding Wendy was a little creepier this time. I swear I heard that good stock creepy child laughter in the background.

Then the ferryman left This was a nice bit of foreshadowing; following the Aerie events I wanted to hop over to Seafront to take care of an extant sidequest only to find the ferry dock in the Northern Plains empty. I thought that maybe this was just a weird way of railroading you to make sure you went through the Village first, even though there were no scenes that would trigger just by being in the Village.

Alas.

Not gonna lie, when the couple was first introduced I thought for SURE it was going to be the wife who wound up dead. I guess it’s because the guy had a purpose as an NPC so yeah, I was tricked. Good design decision; the ferryman is talkative and bright and definitely difficult to forget and even though he was kinda obnoxious there’s a definite void where his dialogue was. It’s clever too that you’re forced to use the ferry at least once so you can’t escape the dialogue that you’re presented with, meaning that even if you don’t really make use of the ferry you’ll always have that contrast between him at the start of Part II and the other guy (his brother, maybe?) taking over the job and just not really talking to you afterward.

Episode Mermaid First of all, to be clear, I’ve not done the Route B playthrough yet. All I know about the Little Mermaid is what’s presented on the surface, what can be gleaned from there, what I remember reading in the Grimoire NieR short story. This is very much just an impression and reaction to the first encounter and it’s pretty cool.

I like that they managed to go into yet another genre style aping a point-and-click adventure.

I like the atmosphere of the wrecked ship. It really brought me back to the ‘ghost ship’ level archetype with its little hints of spookiness.

I appreciate that it ties subtly in to the Haunted Manor (technically the Part I Seafront dungeon) with Weiss’ utterly irrational fear of ghosts.

I love every excuse they find to get Kaine and Emil (and especially Kaine) out of a situation. It’s almost a running gag that Kaine keeps getting knocked out of dungeons and boss fights. None of them are quite as great as her getting Rules Lawyer’d in the Barren Temple, but there’s something delightful about “Let’s get you some fresh air, we’ll be right outside, be careful!” and then bookending it with Kaine and Emil just chilling at the end like “Well yeah there are a lot of holes in the hull we just popped in.”

(I forgot to go backward to see what happens if you try to take them into Seafront proper, gotta remember that next time.)

Interesting thing when you find some of the dropped apples is that Nier and Weiss talk about the dinner they had with the couple. This was actually a really sweet and oddly emotional conclusion to the added sidequest between the bickering couple-- entirely missable. I would assume the dialogue just doesn’t trigger if you didn’t do the quest but it was a nice touch.

I appreciate the use of dead bodies in the hold.

(That’s a sentence.)

But for the game’s focus on violence and excess of blood it’s very selective in how it uses actual corpses. Any time you see a dead body it really emphasizes the seriousness of the situation. The corpses in the hold and the blood spatter -- especially compared to how bright and clean Seafront as a whole is -- was surprisingly effective. Again, just good atmospheric buildup.

Bit of an anticlimax as a boss, though. It is a really cool boss, between the environmental buildup to the fight and then actually unveiling her, but for how big and scary she is the fight itself went by fairly quick, and the actual finale (the postman whacking her hand telling her to go away she’s groooooss) felt a bit weird in comparison to the way the boss fights in the rest of the game usually play out. Of course, I don’t have context of her dialogue (I can take my guesses, her holding out her hand to Hans as he freaks out and attacks her is already a palpable tragedy) and by the way the scene was framed I suspect the Route B reveal is where the most important part of the scenario lies.

And the seals came back! It’s the little things.

“I wish I was Fyra.” So in the original Replicant the conversation between Emil and Nier before Sech’s wedding was apparently an implication that Emil had a crush on Nier and wanted to marry him. It was ambiguous enough that people had to ask for clarification and some players interpreted it as a weird, childish expression of looking up to and respecting Brother Nier. It was clarified in the Grimoire NieR that Emil is gay and crushing hard on Brother Nier, and this line of dialogue here seems to have been... not made explicit, but changed even between RepliCant and ver. 1.22 to make the implication a little clearer, at least insofar as he isn’t interested in girls. (It winds up missing the implication that he’s into Nier specifically, though.)

...which is funny, because it colors his introduction to the King of Facade somewhat differently. These two meeting is honestly really sweet on a few levels (Sechs recognizing him from Nier’s descriptions, which implies that Nier’s been visiting Sechs regularly and so proud of his interactions with Emil he told the king of another nation all about him, and the King is legit excited to meet him) but then a couple of minutes later Emil is all ‘I’m so jealous of Fyra’. He isn’t crushing on Nier, but he is totally crushing on Sechs.

Endgame At this point in the game the distinction between Brother and Father has become mostly lost and the final charge is pretty much the same as

wait what’s up with the music in the Lost Shrine? This is Snow in Summer.

Or an arrangement thereof. That particular track level from Snow in Summer winds up getting used in a few new places and it has this kind of weird, vague sense of dread that makes it work pretty well. Utterly threw me off in the Lost Shrine, though (I think it’s appropriate given its connection to the Shadowlord/Gestalt Nier so slowly re-introducing it in the climb is pretty cool). It also builds insanely as you climb, which is a very cool effect but, um, I’m just here to pick up some sidequest items right now this feels like a little much.

There isn’t much to say regarding any impact or differences in the large part of this area of the game. It’s a good final dungeon, it carries good momentum, it works as well as it ever did (that is to say, rather well). The emotional beats are great and translate equally well between the protagonists, although I have to give the nod to Papa Nier during a lot of this just for the imagery of such a big, powerful man becoming so broken the further he goes in (and Kaine being strong enough to toss him around like a rag doll anyway).

The final flashback with Nier and Yonah also feels better with Papa Nier. I always read it as, of course, Papa Nier having his moment with Yonah, giving her the flower, and as he lays back down Yonah does the same big sigh like she’s trying to emulate her dad and it’s really sweet. This is another one of those moments where it’s not something that feels wrong in Replicant, but just having that comparison in the back of my head is something that I just can’t help.

Is Papa Nier still Best Neir? Yes.

But there’s room in my heart for Brother. I’m glad the bizarre marketing decision happened and both of these characters can exist.

...and then we reload the save. Okay, okay, so-- so here’s the thing-- I figured that’s a good place to conclude a session, right? Get to the ending, prepare for the next run. But I also know that Route B starts with Kaine’s unskippable novel segments. I’ve read them, of course, so I figure I’ll just reload into Route B so I can make a save after the novel sections, really get into the meat of Route B when I’m fresh.

So skim through those--

Beat up the Knave--

Skim through the rest--

Educated Warrior... didn’t pop...?--

Wait what’s this camera angle--

Why am I outs--

oh my god

oh my god

KAINE AND EMIL HAVING GIGGLY GIRL TALK AROUND THE CAMPFIRE OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING

THERE’S MORE.

THERE’S. MORE.

I legit short-circuited. Going in I knew they added the Little Mermaid. I knew they added Ending E. Those were things I suspected would be added and went out to specifically confirm; beyond that I’ve been keeping myself completely spoiler free.

I had no idea there was more. I had no idea this was happening.

I’m so excited.

And a goofy thought for the road

“I polished you with a special cloth, I poured warm water on you--”

“Wait, you poured water on me?”

/imagines Emil running blindfolded eight hours across the Southern Plains with an 8oz plastic water cup, getting to the library, splashing it on Kaine, waiting expectantly

/nothing happens

/walks dejectedly eight hours all the way back to the Manor

[shipwrecknights]

SANDIPURWARA 2K19

Ok this is gonna be the longest post ever but i HAVE to write this so bear with me

My annual school theatre production just ended yesterday and the post production blues are at an all-time high. I am terrible at farewells; I’m not a very sentimental guy, not very expressive and I can’t articulate affection well without preparation first. This isn’t my first production, in fact it’s my fourth. I have literally been through this every year for four years in a row and every time it hits hard but this year the feeling is nearly overwhelming. My family and friends always ask my why i keep going back, seeing that the trainings take so much out of me every year. But the fact is, they will never understand. The love that i receive in return from this production....my god. These people are really my family. Never have i met a group of people so easy to talk to, to confide in, who complains so much about having to train and yet come back every day and give it their 80% (lol). I am SO thankful that they are in my life. I’ve watched this project grow over the years and these people have also watched me grow; from an actor in Ziarah and Cinta Mawar, to a scriptwriter in Kalbu and finally a stage manager in Sandipurwara. In 2015 i was a boy with literally no friends in uni, no interest at all in Malay theatre and now I have a 50+ pax strong family gained over the years. In no particular order, these are just some of the people that made Sandipurwara so special for me: To the PDs: Thank you for pulling me into this show. I was adamant about joining intro this year because i felt that i had to move on in life, and that 3 years was a nice number to leave at. When Halijah texted me (nearly begging) to take up the role as ASM, I just thought what the heck. She is my friend and I should help. Halijah and i met in 2016 during Ziarah. We were both cast members and we weren’t close close, but close enough to joke around every day. I always thought she was hilarious. And a very talented actor. She’s the kind of person that makes everyone in the room laugh with her crazy antics, even when the mood is tense, which was almost always the case. I always say to her “Tu lah siapa suruh jadi PD,” not to mock her capability, but just as a running joke because we were always one of the lazy ones who just wanted to go for smoke breaks during training. And yet there she was this year leading the whole ass project. She has balls. The shit that she went through this year. I feel so sorry for always being honest with you, about your leadership style, about the first script that we all turned down, for always replying to you in a stern, I’m-pissed-off manner. You don’t deserve all that. But I’m honest because I always knew you could be better. Four years is a long time!!! You are essentially like my baby sister now. I hope we can hang out more often, go to gigs together maybe. Anyways you fucking did it jah. I couldn’t be more proud of you, couldn’t be more proud to have worked under you. Some people were skeptical when you wanted to be PD but you definitely proved them wrong. I will never forget you and Zu during Ziarah, acting in the training room at block A level 5, getting scolded by Abang Mok, and crying, and STILL continuing the comedy scene. All with tears rolling down your face. Fuck. You were trying so hard and that made me wanna cry too. Congrats Jah. I love you so much and thank you for everything. (anyways emo night pe) As for Naj, we also met in 2016. She acted as the mother of my best friend in the show, and she really suited the role LOL kidding. But Naj is a good actor and dancer, AND a brilliant admin person, something that I can never do ever. What i like about her the most is that she is quiet, takes all the shit she receives and just get the work done without much noise. Basically the opposite of us all. This year she took up the role of APD, and did it while still being herself. I’ve always respected her, seeing her take up so many important roles the past few years. Someone once said to me, Naj is like one of the most senior person here, starting all the way from Iman, but never once did she mention that or use it as a way to assert her seniority. Thank you Naj. The world needs more humble + hardworking people like you <3 And then there’s Shakir. Fucking hell, where do i start. I wasn’t too fond of you when I first met you. Your face and mouth sometimes really mintak kene rembat. But one day it really hit me (and it upset me quite a bit): YOU ARE JUST LIKE ME. Hahahaha fuck we were both cursed with the dying need to speak our minds and filter absolutely nothing. I guess from that day on I just learnt to tolerate your shit because I understand you. You’re probably the most articulate guy in all the intros (but not in malay obviously). Even though your rhyming poems are corny as hell, I respect that you always speak to us in such a concise and inclusive manner, always try to get your opinion across as tactfully as possible, always thinking of how others would feel, even when you’re an insensitive fuck deep down. You always try to mingle with all the departments, which makes it look like you’re friendly, but we all know you just don’t want to feel FOMO. You are the APD that no one wanted but we all NEED. I’m glad we got a bit closer this year because I feel that being so alike, we can learn a lot from each other. Its a shame we didn’t get to see the Jacket Pelacur ™ this year, but we all know you’re busy making moves silently and to that I wish you all the best. I will never forget out stressful trip finding paint and kain, the girls searching for our felt pads while we stand around doing nothing at Spotlight, and you asking me about haram keropok at Daiso wihle I’m almost crying about the damn skirting. Also, good luck with your stint as the MCMS president. You are the first malay-muslim club president that constantly sleeps in girl’s laps, says the f-word, says Bismillah at the end of a speech instead of the beginning, and changes pants at the storage area without the conscience of even closing the door. You do you bro. I will pray that you see the light and be a better person, but thank you for constantly checking up on me and always being a brother. Love you bro #idkmanidk

To my SM Irfan: Bro. Brooooooo. You are one helluva guy. Sometimes I felt that you were overemotional about many things, something that an insensitive guy like me could never understand. But the more you opened up to me, the more I learnt to understand that you just have a very big heart. You get stressed very easily by very small things people say. But that always pushed you to work harder. I always look at you working so hard to plan our PT/crew sessions, and yet some nights you text me shit like im sorry, i feel like im not doing enough as an SM. BRUH. Kau stop it. But that really sums up what kinda person you are. Truly a humble guy that just wants to go around spreading joy to people with his lame-ass puns. I couldn’t have had a better partner. It was tough doing SM things with no third ASM, and come to think of it we been through so many obstacles that only you and I know about. Constantly texting each other about the shit we have yet to do and don’t know how to do, skyping till 3am at night when there’s training at 10am the next morning. It was a great learning process working alongside you. When we hugged just before the last show, you immediately started to cry and that made me tear up, so I pulled away and got the fuck away from you because I didn’t wanna cry as hard. We are two very ugly criers. I am truly sorry if i have ever wronged you, went away to smoke while you’re busy doing stage work, raised my voice at you, and especially sorry that I made you plan all the PT sessions by yourself. I’m sorry if i ever made your life more stressful. Thank you for showering the crew babies with so much love and attention on my behalf. I think your leadership was more than sufficient and that without you, this show couldn’t have been what it was. Love you Erphie baby To Fitri: FITTTTT. I think you were the one who pulled me into auditioning for the first production in 2016. I rmb just randomly coming to the audition and you were being over-appreciative, thanking me for coming haha. You’ve been there for me right from the start. Always supporting me in everything I do, no matter how shitty my acting was, and no matter how bad I was at script writing. You really are the mother of Introspeksi. But you are also like my sister, my teacher, my maid, my best friend, and my girlfriend (rarely). Truly the MVP of Introspeksi, you always selflessly help the PDs and casts every single year, shower us with love and push us to grow. I love that you always tell us to renew our niat whenever we come for training in order to help us get through the exhaustion, the scoldings, and everything negative. I feel sad whenever you get scolded by Abang Mok because I know you’re just trying your hardest to prolong the legacy of this special project. Even though you’re not the pioneer PD of Intro, I feel that you’re the one that started this big family because thanks to you we’re all involved in this crazy business. There’s really nothing I can do to repay you so I’ll just say thank you, for making my life in uni much much better. Continue being the strong, independent and ambitious woman that you are and I’m very sure you’ll be very successful one day. Love you Fit you’re my idol <3

To Zahir: My man. Another person that I’ve been through so much with. I miss our days with izzah and the bebs, sitting at the skatepark and under void decks till 3am, literally laughing till we cry. Those days I will never forget. Acting alongside you in Cinta Mawar, playing two really redundant roles, was also a fun experience although you were upset that your scenes were cancelled on show day hahaha. I knew you always wanted to act some more ever since that show. And then there’s Kalbu, writing the script with you was one hell of an experience, kita kene kecam every training by everyone, script lambat script lambat, script lambat macam cb. (f u shakir) No one knew how hard it was to write such a serious script under close scrutiny of two PDs, numerous advisors, and ofc Abang Mok. And yet I think we managed to have some, if not most, of our ideas remain in the final cut of the script and I’m still very proud of that. I’m sorry for all the times I scolded you, saying you weren’t putting in enough effort, etc. This year you finally got casted as a main and bro I’m so fucking proud of you. Wasn’t confident with your acting at first but during the show, as i watch you and Hidhir from the side curtain, i thought to myself, damn these guys r really trying so hard and it’s really paying off. Your role was really made for you and I’m so happy that your goofing off on stage actually made the show 10x more entertaining. Dalam diam, you’ve contributed so much to the club, and introspeksi, and you did it all while always making everyone laugh. You’re really a one-of-a-kind friend and we all love you. Didn’t really get to show my appreciation to you after Kalbu (idk why we all never post anything) but bro thank you for everything, thanks for the hard work, thanks for all the laughs, for the lepak/jam sessions, the (two) fitspo sessions, for the subtle looks/touches whenever a cute girl is nearby. No matter how rarely we meet I’ll always treasure this friendship man I love you (I ain’t never gonna stop loving you....biiitch) To Jannah: I know I didn’t spend as much time with you this year as I did in the last, but you know I love you janz. Everyone keeps pulling out the “mana nak lepak dgn kita lagi” shit on me, but you were always impartial and the most cool about it. I hope you know that I cherish our time together from Cinta Mawar and Kalbu, no matter how much we drift apart. Anyways congratulations for another brilliant year in acting. From the start, I knew you were our only hope for the cast. You have always been disciplined, practicing at home, staying in character, doing research, coming on time every training, etc. Your dedication to Intro always impresses me. You, Durr, Win, Zahir and me went through so much crazy shit man in Kalbu. I will never forget. All the passive aggressive texts, trying to get me and Zahir to buck tf up, us not meeting all the script deadlines, sharing personal stories with each other, writing the script at Woodlands AND the masjid till 5am, and all the laughter. So much laughter was shared. It feels like there was no proper closure for Kalbu, cos the four of us never really showed our appreciation to each other/say our farewell properly. No idea why. But well here it is now. Thank you Jannah for everything. You were the first person to make me cry backstage before the final Sandi show. Kau just masalah, aku tengok muka kau je nak nangis. AND even when the final show started, when I saw you singing so enthusiastically (and badlly) at the handheld mic on stage left, swaying left to right even when no one was watching, man that made me tear up too. Never stop being you, the kind-hearted, sisterly figure that everyone feels comfortable being with. Lepak soon, love you baby girl <3 To Durr-baby/daddy: What a guy you are. Even though you’re younger, I’ve always looked up to you from the start. Wise beyond your years, you’ve always been that calming voice for when I’m stressed out with Intro. You always help us out so selflessly, sometimes it makes me feel uncomfortable/guilty thinking about it. But its ok because you always show how sincere you are when lending a hand. This year, you’re just an advisor, who doesn’t need to come that often. But yet you attend every training, stood alongside Irfan and I, almost playing the role as the third SM. I appreciate every time you take charge and give out instructions to the crew when you notice that I’m stressed out/can’t lead very well. And you do all this without overstepping any boundaries, always respectful to the two of us. And to think you were and APD and VP of the club last year. If all future exco members follow in your footsteps, i’m sure MCMS will breed an amazing group of individuals. Tapi kau pun satu masalah. I clearly said don’t go behind and see Jannah, you will cry. Kau pergi jugak. Kau just nak semua orang nangis dengan kau hahahahahahahaha its ok bro i understand crying hURTS SO GOOD. Thank you Durr for the countless nights of sending everyone home even when you’re exhausted. Thank you for always keeping me and Irfan grounded in chaotic times. Thank you for the kekek times at stage left, staring at the transitions with me and shakir like its visual ganja, muttering those two comforting words into my ear, “double pivot”, and for always reminding me and everyone that letting out our feelings is fucking important to survive. Love you durrbaby stay sweg A special shoutout to the new friends I made this year, Hidhir and Junie. Ya’ll are just gerek. Thank you for joining our intro family even when you really didn’t need to, and for giving your all for every scene. Firstly I have to say y’all (+ Zahir and Hazeeq) made our saturday mornings a living hell. Wake up late, sick, heavy traffic, phone died, and all the cock reasons ya’ll gave. It got to the point that Junie gave me her house number to call her mum to wake her??? Just hal. Sampai show day dia lambat, faham eh. But anyways. I’m so glad you two decided to join this year. Thank you for being so easy to talk to, as a sister and brother, thanks to Hidhir for welcoming us into his home that one fateful night, for always spreading love and hugs and being emotional as fuck during debriefs. Thank you Junie for being so open with us, always sharing your stories, even tho we never ask. Thanks for pushing yourself even with all the heavy criticism from the directors. If you need your mic box to be checked again, just hmu. To Hazeeq, you alr helped us last year in Kalbu, but this year returned again as another main cast. The best part about Hazeeq is that he is friends with e v e r y o n e and always goes around the room to have conversations with every single person. Proper friendly guy, I’m gonna miss your hugs and kisses every night and your “Sorry I’m sorry....she correct.....I wrong.” Stay gold my brotha, a guy like you is not easy to find so pls make sure you never change.

Last but definitely not the least, my CREW BABIES. Y’all are surely an odd bunch, all randomly coming to help our production. But ya’ll are the best crew I’ve ever seen in my 4 years here!!! Never complaining, even when you come to training and do absolutely nothing. Always understanding towards me and Irfan, listening to what we say, and helping out when we don’t know what to say. Working so hard on the sets and props, ya’ll are always on autopilot and didn’t need us to guide you all the time. Thank you Alfiera (you basic bimbo bish), Aliah, D.Hadi, Hadi Shy, Haziq (ma man), Sheeda, Syazwani (non-tudung), Syaza Aliah (my twine girl u saved my life every show ily) and Zana (my only stage left buddy). I love you all I swear. Special shoutout to DIBO DEE, Dibo baby thank you so much for all your help. You’re so crafty and creative and calm and cool when you do work. I love how your voice changes when its time for serious work and how you go around spreading love and giving sweets to everyone. Can never forget the moaning sounds that erupted from your phone during our dry run hahaha U STAY COOL DIBO ILY. And!!! Special special shoutout to my 3 fav crew girls: Rania, Wani and Sofiyah!!! Idk if ya’ll are my adiks or girlfriends but rest assured I love being around you guys and i’m glad we got close thru this show. You’re all too damn young but trust me if i could I’d marry all of you HAHA. To Rania, thanks for being a walking meme factory, I still can’t believe i’m friends with a 19 year old ffs. But hey you have great taste in music just like me. We can have a date lying down on the beach while listening to the XX and Arcade Fire one day ok. Thanks for shaving your legs for me, calling me every day to pray subuh (I don’t deserve you) and for being so candid about yourself to me. I’ll text you if i’m 30 and single ok pls be my backup plan. God bless you baby girl i love you. To Wani, sorry for saying that you’re too emotional when ya’ll were upset after getting shit for wardrobe things. But you’re so cute when you’re mad?? Hahaha and sorry for saying that you’re conservative (tho there’s nothing wrong with that) just because you’re a madrasah girl. Actually you’re pretty open about everything. Thanks for being a kind hearted person, always looking out for me, and putting up with the nonsense that me and Shakir talk about. Love you Wani if you miss me just hmu and I’ll be there. To Sofiyah, uuuu fuckin’ weirdo. I love how casual you are about everything and how I don’t have to think of what I say around you. Also, I admire how you always kept your shit together even when people were shitting on you about wardrobe things. Thank you for picking up the role despite having no experience in past Introspeksis. You did great man. Continue to participate in the coming years and I hope you get a guy as meaty as Hidhir or has a nice body like mine (#2 best body). Please curb your thirst for skinship and kembali ke jalan yang benar. Hahahahahaha love u Soffy baby see u soon xx And to everyone else, those unmentioned, please know that I love you guys too. Nana, Shaik, Yus and Aishah y’all are my seniors who i look up to whenever we’re doing a show and your knowledge and advice are always valuable to us. I always see you guys as who we’re supposed to grow into in the field of arts, even tho korang berbual merepek 75% of the time. Nana your play-flirting makes me turn off my comms headset but you’re an amazing amazing actor, SM, PD, and now lights technician. My respect for you has always been 10/10. This year you never shout at me, very good. Aishah, your acting has always been crazy good and this year you reminded us again. Thanks for being the big sister figure to all of us babies, while at the same time spewing inappropriate sexual nonsense 24/7. You da besttt. Shaik and Yus, thanks for being the big bros that i never had, always so cool and quiet but so talented with the music. And of course the musicians, who practice so hard every day, hitting the rebana till your hands bruise, coming early everyday to go through every riff/melody/tune and taking all the new ideas from Abang Mok and giving it life. Y’all are so amazing and you continue to be the best part of our shows every time. The dancers, I watched you guys train from the start!!!! Honestly it was very scrappy at first, and you guys went through so much drama and changes and getting shouted at, and of course injuries. All the bandages and patches and ankle guards were worth it cos you guys were amazing on show night, I know because I watched from the side curtain every time. Love the fight song number so much <3 For the rest of the cast, those with supporting roles, ya’ll were equally amazing and some of you even with one scene got an ovation from the crowd. Thank you for the hard work day in day out despite not landing a major role; your patience and understanding made the show what it was; a gathering of unique characters from different walks of life all for a single purpose.

Finally, I’m really sorry if i have wronged anyone in any way, which i prolly have. I love all my friends and never have any intention to hurt them. This shit that we did together was SO special and people will never understand the bond that’s been forged here so I hope these friendships lasts for as long as they possibly can. What Yus said was spot on: there is no “final year” or “last show” because Introspeksi is a family and you can never run away from that :’) Ok PEACE OUT ILY’ALL

[han100894]

Some of My Frustration with NNT

So this is probably going to be a controversial take, but as much as I like NNT, there are things about it that have been bothering me.

One big one is, despite attempting at least lip service, the girls often vastly get overshadowed by the guys.

(Note, this is me airing my frustrations, I still like NNT, I like all of theses ships to some extent, I don’t mean to rain on anyone’s parade. It would be awesome to know if anyone else agrees, but mostly I’m just trying to make myself feel better and honestly it may not be the best written and I’m probably forgetting points that made me feel this way and I’m sure I’ve forgotten things in the Manga itself.)

Just look at the three biggest ships: Kaine, Banlaine, and Melizabeth.

I like Kaine, it was my first favorite ship but… it’s ultimately King’s story. The majority of the focus is on King’s POV and feelings. Even Daine’s memory loss is played more about how he feels than her—she doesn’t even get a chance to get mad at Gowther for it, or for that matter angry at King—no instead King gets mad on her behaft. She gets pulled around by the plot, and the memory loss in particular to give King extra angst. Even her confused feeling for Meliodas are mostly played as comic relief, drama fodder early on with Elizabeth, and to King more angst. We get very little from her POV.

And whenever Diane tries to protect King (In my memory at least) it always backfires on her, leading to King to Angst and “power up” and come to the rescue.

She has no real major victories to her name. Generally in any fight from the second half of arc 1 and moving forward she’s either coached by King (The Vytle festival, he saves Diane and defeats his enemy alone, but Diane needs couching), or King takes the spotlight (fighting Helbram, fighting Mael)

The only plot point she gets on her own is the brief time with Matrona after she loses her memory once again. Otherwise her plotlines are heavily tangled with King’s and again we usually see things from King’s point of view. Even when they both went back to the past Diane ends up goofing off but King notices something is wrong. We just—we never get into her head like we do King. We don’t see anywhere near the kind of character development he has.

And King gets several plots unconnected to Diane, Helbram, the fairy forest, Ban and his sister, his inferiority complex…

I just wish she’s get some focus that didn’t revolve around King (or Mel)—and also that she got a chance to protect King without it instantly backfiring on her or making King feel bad about himself again…

(Also, there is no reason for Diane to be “equivalent of 15” none at all. Made even worse once King gets to go through “fairy puberty” in an instant and grow up something she can’t do (Also why the heck would 700=15 when giants only live to like 2000?)

And then Banlaine:

Let’s be honest, Elaine exists almost completely as a prop for Ban’s story, up to and including dying on him (aka being fridged) and causing his manangst and driving his story). She spend half the story dead and the other half deathly ill. She has little to no interaction with anyone else—even her conversations with her own brother is all about Ban.

She doesn’t even really get much of a say about the whole thing, Ban’s quest to save her, it just is.

I do think the Raven’s arc was the best arc, but it was so entirely because of Jericho and her character development and drive, not because of Elaine. She had one moment of cute interactions with Elizabeth as they fought off two people who had no build up and were pretty much fodder, and then she had one moment where she saved Ban and managed to “grow up” something that’s downplayed slightly by being part of the reason Ban gets into his huge angst, and her losing her upgrade literally the next time we really see her just in time for Ban to save her (And turning her back into a child look alike) something that was truly not necessary. Gloxina didn’t lose his wings when he died, and wings are literally something fairies are killed for to sell—she could have stilled died and not lose her upgrade.

Honestly what I want from her is her to get to talk with her god damn brother, and maybe actually work things out on screen how he hurt her, and her understanding how he did so almost entirely unintentionally without Ban being their or brought up would be nice. Off screen does not count at all either. other than that let her be a person and not a prop!

And finally Melizabeth

Technically, or at least some people believe so, Meliodas and Elizabeth are the two main, main characters of the story. Honestly I kinda feel that Meliodas, Ban and King are the one who have gotten the most development and focus throughout the whole story, or at least until recently.

Elizabeth has tried, but in a lot of situation she’s been a plot point (Getting kidnapped, the seed not being in the cup for her test, ect) or had a lot of her agency taken from her to push the story along. Ever since she got her memories back she’s been trying to change that yes, but so far has instead been nearly instantly kidnapped and put into a situation where she could only be saved by others. (And yes, in story context she as in a bad situation for her powerset, but Nakaba still decided to have this happened to her and decided that she could do nothing to help just after she decided she would do something about all of this. It’s not like he didn’t have a choice.)

Meanwhile Meliodas has mostly treated Elizabeth like a child—which is fair considering she is one, she’s only 16 (Seriously, why couldn’t she have been at least 18, what would that have changed other than a tiny bit of the creepy factor)��but even after she regains her memories, he decides what he’s going to do with no input from her (Take the Commandment, break the curse, kidnap her, ect) and yes he has no emotions at the time but it’s still really shitty and only a step more than earlier when he refused to allow her to join the Sins again at the start of arc 2, without even explaining why, and even insulting and hurting her instead.

And it’s not that I want her to be a badass fighter. I’m fine with her being a realistic pacifist and mostly a healer and leader—that’s great. I just want her to have more agency instead of being shoved around to force the plot to do what Nakaba wants and get a chance to actually help Meliodas like she wants.

Bonus: Monspeet and Derieri

Their relationship is interesting, as on its outside it’s actually reverses some of the tropes this story has. Derieri is the one who get most of the focus and character development, while Monspeet is somewhat behind her. And in a twist, instead of the girl being fridged for the guy’s character development, the guy is fridged for the girls. Something rare enough that I actually thought that Monspeet’s death was somewhat okay (Up until Derieri’s story faltered right after).

Derieri has the same somewhat realization as Elizabeth—she was always the one being protected by Monspeet, being taken cared of by him, and how she wanted to be the one who did it back.

But then just as she was getting a big moment, finally a chance to somewhat redeem herself and try and help stop this war and save Mael, she is killed just as she’s about to do it, stopping her story cold turkey.

And now with Mael doing the weird reincarnation thing I have to ask why. If she’s almost certainly going to come back at some point (probably in the sequel—Arthur’s story I’d assumed if it actually happens) why couldn’t she have succeeded when she was so close. Why did she have to be worfed to show off Mael and eventually being the catalyst to power up King.

It’s just… frustrating.

I just wish she’s been allowed to succeeded after everything. I wish she’d gotten at least one moment where she protected Monspeet.

Last complaint

And one thing that has bothered me over all is, most notably while Ban and Meliodas were in Purgatory, how “We are going to get out of here and save our girls” which is great I guess, but, both them, and King in his “I have to protect you” say it so often that it almost feels…infantizing. The guys are so obsessed with taking care of and protecting the girls who don’t get the same chance to do it for them, or try and get punished for it, or realize to late and it’s just…

Ban and Mel really do it, King has his huge “I have to save everyone” complex, even Monspeet goes overboard with Derieri a bit (hitting away the rocks anyone). Escanor is similar, though he respects and believes in Merlin as much as he wants to jump to her defense making him a bit of an exception but I have no idea if Escalin is supposed to be a thing or not at this point. Margret got to be political prisoner for ages, and when she went out to find Gil she gets manipulated into becoming Ludo’s host. Veronica gets a whole side plot only for it to suddenly stop with no conclusion.

I just want the girls to get to do cool things, sometimes completely unconnected to the boys, and not have it backfire on them or get overshadowed. I want the relationships to have more equal screen time between each partner, Is that so much?

[mimiplaysgames]

Strength to Protect the Things That Matter (Ch. 17)

Pairing: Terra/Aqua (eventually) Rating: T Other characters: Master Eraqus, Riku, Sora, Kairi, Xehanort Word Count: 11,596 In-progress

Summary: Terra has prayed for years for relief from having no one to talk to in the dark, except with the monster of a man who stole his life. He gets his chance - less than a week - to set things right before he loses everything again.

AO3          FF.net

A/N: This is an 11k behemoth, omg! I had more planned for this chapter, but I can’t fit more. Despite that I have already announced how the rest will be laid out and when this fic will finish, I had to split this one. Instead of one transitionary chapter, you guys will get two. This part is the Destiny Trio fluff (kind of). I’ve pretty much accepted that the way I write fluff is just my style. The next chapter will be the Final Fantasy part, and it’s really weird to end this chapter differently than the rest. But I really do hope that it’s enjoyable at the very least!

Vacation

The park was small. Terra sat on a bench where the grass met the sidewalk, where an endless sea of grey and otherwise colorless skyscrapers surrounded the little patch of green. From there, he watched the other children play kickball. His cheeks, arms, and abdomen still hurt from earlier, and his bruises were still a vibrant purple. He reached for the bandage on his face, which covered a scratch he received when he was pushed into the dirt and had grazed a rock.

One of the kids kicked the ball and it flew his direction. He scurried over to pick it up, and was quick to throw it back. There he stood, waiting to see if this small interaction would lead to an invitation to join the game. 

But children were either mean or didn’t know what to do with someone like him, and that invitation never came. This meant that he wasn’t wanted, so he sat back on the bench and continued to observe.

Of course, the exact adult who had scolded him earlier for his behavior was the one who noticed that he was all by himself. The organizer of the orphanage, who also taught the children, approached to sit down next to him.

“You don’t want to play?” she asked, her eyes hidden behind glasses and incredibly long blonde hair, where only half of it was tied upward in a bun. She wore a bright orange dress, so that anyone could find her if they needed.

Of course he wanted to play. It was just hard to deal with the humiliation. Besides, no one wanted to play with him. “No, Miss Quistis.”

She stroked his hair and pursed her lips. “I’m so sorry, Terra, that you feel this way. But you know it isn’t right to punish the other boys.”

“Yes, ma’am.” His voice was small and high-pitched, and he stared at the grass. The other kids would probably spread rumors over what they were talking about right now.

“I have allowed you to come out and play because I know you thought you were doing the right thing,” she said, trying to catch his gaze by leaning forward. She patted his head. “I think it would be good for you to open up a little to the others. I’m sorry if today was embarrassing for you.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

She continued to sit there until she finally let go, sighing as she headed off. She would probably say to the other staff members that she didn’t know what to do with him... It was something he heard her say before.

Terra kicked some rocks that were peacefully laying there in front of him. When he got bored of waiting for anyone else to talk to him, he scanned the perimeter for the man who would pass by. 

Every day this week it seemed, there was a peculiar man wearing a white robe who walked by the park during recess. He definitely dressed funny. All the kids spoke to themselves about why this stupid-looking man was dressed that way and wondered what he was doing. Some of the kids said he was a homeless loony. Others said he might be a wizard. 

If anything, the man was nice. He always smiled and waved at the children who would catch him walking by.

But he didn’t come today. Terra skipped over to the tree right next to the bench. If he climbed it, he would be able to see a bit further down the streets that weren’t blocked by any of the dull skyscrapers. Maybe he could see which of the kids were cheaters. 

Except he couldn’t reach the lowest branch.

A man’s voice behind him spoke. “That’s a mighty tall tree for you, isn’t it?” 

He turned and found himself facing the funnily-dressed man. Up this close, he was certainly tall, and Terra noticed a deep, dark scar across his face. Maybe he was a bad guy. He was a stranger after all, and all of the adults thought that strangers kidnapped children. 

But how could he know which ones he should talk to and which ones he shouldn’t? Miss Quistis also wanted him to open up to others. Maybe this man was a mighty warrior and was really cool. Who else had scars like that?

“Mister, why do you have a scar on your face?” Terra asked.

The man chuckled and touched his cheek, then pointed to the bandage on the little boy’s face. “You seem to have one, too.”

“Well Kain and Cecil were fighting over who was going to be captain and they are supposed to be friends,” Terra said with multiple breaths as he seamlessly went through each word, smoothing his r’s so they sounded like w’s. “The rules say that no one is allowed to fight, so I told them that they were stupid and breaking the rules, but because they are older, they pushed me and kicked me. Nobody helped me neither. They don’t listen when the grown-ups say that you should take care of your friends.”

The man laughed through his nose, and kneeled behind the tree to meet Terra face-to-face. “I also fought with a dear friend of mine. That is how I got this scar. He was supposed to be like my older brother, and what hurt worse than the scar was losing someone like him from my life.”

“You should tell him he’s being dumb.”

The man laughed out loud. “You obviously care very much about the deeper bonds that friends have the ability to create.”

“I guess so.” He rubbed his arm and rocked his hips side-to-side. “I wish friends could stay friends forever. If I had friends, I would make them feel safe.”

“What’s your name, son?”

“Terra.”

“Hello, Terra. My name is Eraqus.”

“Era- um...”

“It’s alright, I couldn’t tell you how my mother came up with that name.” The man smiled. “I think you have a strong heart, Terra, and that makes you special. Can you keep a secret?”

No one had ever included him in any of those coveted secrets before, where groups of kids would share a connection that no one else was allowed to enter. You had to be good enough to be part of one. 

“I can!”

“Well, don’t tell anyone, but I can cast magic.”

Terra’s eyes widened and his mouth gaped. “You’re a wizard.”

The man laughed, his teeth showing behind his bushy mustache. “Not quite. But I help people with my magic.”

“So you’re a hero?”

“Something like that. Are you happy here, Terra?”

He remembered where he was, standing by a tree in a tiny park surrounded by tall buildings, where the grass was the only proof of color in the miles around him. The other children were still playing kickball, and Miss Quistis was tending to a little girl who had fallen over.

“Miss Quistis is nice,” he said. “She takes care of us, and she makes us good food when she cooks. She plays with us, too.”

“Well, I am starting a school to teach my craft of magic to very special children, like yourself. You will be able to help people. Would you like to be my student?”

Terra had always wondered if he would ever see the day when he would leave. He was told only good children who behaved well would get adopted. He saw many children leave, and the friends they left behind were sad to see them gone. Still, the adults told him that children with parents were loved. That they had what was called a home to go to every night, and they got lots of presents for their birthdays. It was always better to have parents.

“Does that mean I’ll get adopted?” Terra asked, his voice quiet.

Eraqus smiled and ruffled through the boy’s hair. “Yes, it does.”

Terra stared for a moment, his deep blue eyes wide. Most children would be jumping with joy, but this was a surprise and most likely a dream. He nodded a little, half-believing that today was finally the day.

“You’ll be my eyes. Is anyone looking this way?” Eraqus said.

Terra quickly glanced around the tree. The kids were busy with their game. Miss Quistis was holding the hand of the little girl, who was now crying. She was trying to catch the attention of one of the other children who might have accidentally pushed the girl over.

“Nope!”

“Then let me show you what I can do.” Eraqus raised his hand, and in swirls of light which felt warm in the air, what looked like a giant key appeared, surrounded by sparkles. He then positioned the hilt toward Terra, and spoke words of initiation as though it was a spell, none of which Terra understood. 

But that key was definitely magical, and it was definitely special. When prompted, he touched it. Then it disappeared.

“You’ll be able to able cast magic as long as you are able to keep this a secret. You don’t want that to wear off, do you?“

Terra giggled. “I’m very good at keeping secrets.”

“Good, I’m counting on you.”

Eraqus ruffled through Terra’s hair one more time before getting up and crossing the park to where Miss Quistis was standing. The other children took notice and all gathered together to stare at him. Terra followed close by, and Eraqus soon introduced himself and expressed his interest in the adoption, and Miss Quistis gestured for Terra to come at her side. She placed her hand gently over his head and told the other kids to allow him to play with them.

The two adults were left talking among themselves. Terra had heard it before countless times with other possible candidates who were initially interested in him, and knew exactly what she would be saying to Eraqus. 

That there would be extensive background checks. That Terra lacked a little bit of discipline. That Eraqus would need to visit him multiple times so that they can be observed to see if they got along, and if the boy felt safe. 

But he was determined to keep the magic key the most secretive secret ever. He was determined to make sure that he could earn this new home. Some of the other kids sneered that such a weird man would be interested in such a weird kid. But that didn’t matter anymore. He had what it took to be a good student and he was going to get a father. Soon, he would leave this place as the happiest child in existence, even if none of the other kids cared if he left.

“How old were you when you met him?” Riku walks alongside him while fiddling with a twig, their feet digging deep into the sand as the ocean waves gently swayed into the beach. Sora and Kairi are far ahead of them, engaged in their own conversation.

��Six.” There is the tiniest of smiles on Terra’s face, and he adjust Aqua’s Keyblade which is now strapped across his back. The morning is bright, and while it is early the atmosphere is incredibly humid, making the temperature seem hotter than it should be.

Riku chuckles and tosses the twig into the sand. “I was about the same age when you came here and changed my whole life.” There is a teasing kind of sneer to his tone, as if he is half-way embarrassed to admit it.

“I remember a little boy who wanted the power and strength necessary to protect what mattered to him. Like his friends.” Terra sees the dock ahead, where he fatefully landed in this world many years ago. “I noticed there was something about you, some strong light.”

“Really?” Riku doesn’t sound prideful, just surprised. Despite being a Master, it’s clear that he keeps a sense of humility when it comes to deeply personal assessments. “You saw, what, light shining out of me or something?”

“No, it was a sensation. I did see... maybe a vision of you as older? I knew on some level that you were meant to have the Keyblade, so I performed the ceremony.”

“Is that normal for you? Visions?”

Terra chuckles. It isn’t like he often speaks about them, even to Aqua. “It happens rarely, but it happens.” He pauses for a moment as he sways his arms back and forth. “It was my intention to visit you several times so that I could train you, actually.”

“I would have liked that, it’s a shame.”

Yes it is. Terra has always wished that he can give the same kind of care and attention to another child out there in need of some magic and hope. To be a teacher and raise a family, just like how his Master has saved all three of them. It shouldn’t have been that Riku was left alone all those years.

His shoulders are tense and he shakes off his nerves with a sharp breath. “You know, traditionally only a Master can do the bequeathing ceremony.”

The two of them stop just under the dock and Riku places his hands on his hips. “Huh, that certainly says a lot about you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Maybe you have what it takes to be a Master.” He shrugs his shoulders. “After everything you’ve been through and seeing the way you fight, I don’t really think I can see you as anything else.”

Terra smiles for a little bit, twisting his lips and bowing his head as he tries to control his reaction to such an undeserved compliment, wondering what Master Eraqus would think. 

Riku nods, as if to stand behind his statement.

“Hey,” Sora calls out to them from afar, cupping his hands around his mouth. “Terra, what’s taking you so long? C’mon, the cave is right here.”

Riku leans over and lets out a mock-contemptuous snort. “Look at him, calling just your name. You might as well stand here all by yourself.” He walks ahead anyway, leading Terra’s way to the cave where a mysterious door has allegedly opened the first time these kids were sent off to an adventure.

“Riku,” Terra says as they get closer, “do you really think that Sora’s theory will work?”

“I don’t know. I’ve been there twice, and it’s like...” Riku stops and turns to face his predecessor. “Listen, if I saw her there, I would have stayed. Apparently the reason why she’s still there was to make sure I got out. But I would have helped her if I knew. I just need you to know that.”

Terra tries to control his breathing and makes a conscious attempt to relax his jaw and let go of the clenching in his fists. “It’s okay,” he says softly, although it’s forced. “That’s something Aqua would do.”

Riku nods sharply and continues on his way. “Anyway, the Door to Darkness doesn’t let any light out. Both of the times I got out, I felt this sense of certainty that I was going to be okay. But I had help and I wasn’t alone, so I do agree that she needs another person to open that Door to Light for her.” He waves his arms in exasperation and let them slap his sides as they fall. “Other than Sora’s theory, I just don’t have any other plausible explanation.”

“What about getting there?”

Riku stops again and inhales slowly. “You let a world fall to darkness and ride it all the way down.”

Terra’s lips tighten at the thought. The job of a Keyblade wielder should be to completely prevent such a scenario. “But we can’t just let that happen.”

Riku nods but continues onward. “Hence the predicament.”

They arrive to where Sora and Kairi wait for them. The cave is hidden by large plants, but when Terra looks hard enough, he can see the opening. He ducks at the entrance, and it opens up as he continues inside. It is quite small, and the air is much cooler than it is outside. There are carvings all along the rocky walls that look like they have been done by small children; close to the ground is a carving of one child giving another a star. Furthest from the entrance is a wooden wall, and he traces his fingers against the smooth surface.

“We have no idea why this wall is even here,” Sora says behind him. “But it actually opened, and Ansem walked through it.”

“You know,” Riku says, “I have seen it open before that night.”

Terra holds his chin as he thinks. “Can you tell me more about what happened when this world fell?”

The three self-taught Keyblade wielders behind him stay quiet and he turns to face them. Riku’s face is completely tense and he doesn’t have the discipline to relax it. Sora scratches his head and looks down on the ground. Kairi fumbles with her hands.

“You know, I don’t remember a single thing from that night,” she says.

“Really?” Sora stops rubbing his hair but keeps his hand in place. “It happened really fast. The sky was dark and cloudy, and there were Heartless everywhere. And... it was just so fast. It was like-”

“It was like the entire world just collapsed on itself and the loose pieces were being blown apart,” Riku says. His tone is stable but stern, as though he is reciting lines that he doesn’t want to perform.

Terra nods slowly, his knuckles tense. “What happened to the rest of the people here?”

Riku sways side to side, his arms crossed. “I think those who aren’t Keyblade wielders... or maybe those that do not possess or have not come across a strong source of light, just fade away into the darkness. They don’t die, exactly, but they cease to exist as long as their world stays trapped.”

So if you don’t disappear, you just consciously suffer the entire way. Oh, Aqua...

Sora holds a fist to his cheek, deep in thought. “But doesn’t that mean they are fine once the world is restored?”

“Well,” Kairi presses her fingers together as she stares at them. “It isn’t consequence-free, exactly. Many of the people here had recurring nightmares for a couple of months, and none of the doctors understood why. Nobody remembers anything about that night, and it just became another one of those mysterious, creepy legends the kids still toss a bunch of conspiracy theories over.”

"And that’s only if a world is restored,” Riku says. Sora stays silent.

Terra presses his palm against the wood. “So, should we assume that there are signs a world will fall before it does? Like a door opening when it shouldn’t exist?”

Riku clears his throat as he finds some of the quiet bravado he normally carries. “You can actually see that a world’s light will start to flicker and fade, but that doesn’t mean that it will fall. It can just mean there are a multitude of Heartless overwhelming it.” He pauses for a brief moment. “I know a couple of sky pirates who do a lot of traveling. One of them isn’t human and she has a sixth sense for this sort of thing, but she isn’t right all the time. Either way, we’ve never just let Heartless take over.”

“And you shouldn’t.” Terra says this so quietly that he isn’t sure if the others heard him.

He caresses the wood. Perhaps he can create a door to the other side here. There is no sickly, hot energy through the wall - no sign of darkness. It’s just wood. False hope for sure, but he has nothing else. 

He breathes deeply and summons his Keyblade. He can feel the others tense up as he does this, anxious to see what tricks he has up his sleeve. He holds the tip of the Keyblade up against the wall... but he is fooling himself.

He drops his Keyblade and sighs. Two years too late to try. “If there was a world beyond this wall, it doesn’t exist anymore.”

Sora groans behind him. “I was really hoping this would work. I’m sorry it didn’t.”

“It’s fine. It’s good we are discussing these kinds of ideas.” Still, just another damn dead end.

“Well, if one plan doesn’t work, we’ll come up with another.” Sora slams his fist into his palm, a reassuring and confident smile on his face.

False hope has no meaning with Sora. Terra cannot keep a frown, and it’s the same feeling as being a child, where he can imagine a happy future with his closest friends. The amount of faith he has is outstanding.

“Sora,” Terra begins, “how can you be so sure?” He can feel a smile on his own face, which doesn’t make sense. He really should dismiss such determination for his own sake.

“I’m not sure. But I won’t believe that it’s necessary to sacrifice anybody to save her.” Sora is approaching this seriously, but there is no way to remove the sound of hope from the tone of his voice. “You’ll never give up looking for her, Terra, so something’s gotta give eventually. I think it’s just a matter of time before we can figure out what will actually work for us.”

“Well,” Riku says, “if you do get any more ideas, Sora, just tell me first before you do anything. Okay?”

“What, you don’t trust me?”

Kairi snorts and Riku rolls his eyes as he walks out of the cave.

Somehow, it is warmer outside. The others swap memories they have shared growing up here. Curiously, Riku is the one to remember the least, despite being older. This fact doesn’t seem to deter Sora’s attitude towards his oldest friend, however, since there are other memories to talk about. With the three of them engaged in their shared experiences, Terra wishes that he will get the same time to delve this deep into nostalgia with Aqua and Ventus one day. Sooner is preferable than later.

They are so involved, in fact, that they don’t notice when Terra gradually moves away towards the ocean. The breeze blowing from that direction is welcome, although it’s nothing like the crisp, dry wind from the mountains, which will slice if it gets cold enough. 

Terra takes off his shoes and socks, and walks through the shallow water, allowing his flowing pants to get wet. His feet sink into the wet sand with every wave, and it’s like a million sensations in one: the coolness of the water gushing in with such a force, the prickly, soft feeling of the sand in between his toes.

It hasn’t been long since he has woken up. Yet, this is the first time he is really realizing that he can feel again. He has been so preoccupied with finding them that he forgets he is alive. But if anyone is deserving of this same feeling, it’s Aqua.

I wish she could hear the ocean. I’ll have to take her here immediately after she’s free.

Terra loses himself in the sound of the water. If he fell to darkness to find her without a better plan, that will leave him trapped as well, but at least he will be with her. It will make it easier on the both of them to stay together. Maybe they can wait for the others to come get them, and he’ll be there to keep her chin up.

But I can’t just let a world fall and let others suffer like that. I wonder if somehow, if I find a door that shouldn’t exist, I can create an opening that way. How did she even get down there in the first place? 

Sacrifice. Darkness. The willingness to give up to be with her. Terrible thoughts to have on such a nice morning when he is supposed to take it easy today. 

The bright morning sun shines on the water, and it’s blinding if he stares at its reflection. But it doesn’t last long. The waves shift and contort, and it is now sunset. Kairi’s laughter from afar fades away. What is left is the sound of crying.

The sunset left the ocean looking dark as he walked down the beach. Ahead of him was a girl slumped over, with short pink hair and wearing an orange tunic, someone he recognized. She was crying into her hands. The waves hit her shoes, but she paid them no mind.

Her sitting there, crying all by herself, was unsightly. It was best to avoid her. But unless he turned around and took a lap around the entire island, there was no way to. Perhaps she wouldn’t notice him passing by...

She sprung up and wiped her eyes and nose. “Norty, I didn’t hear you coming. How are you?” All of her words were smothered with sniffles.

“Hello, Lenna.” His voice was polite as though he didn’t witness anything. “It’s been a pleasant walk. On such a pleasant day.” It sounded contemptuous, almost to the brink of obvious sarcasm, but she never noticed.

“I’m glad someone is having a good day.” She struggled to contain her tears. “If the fates can just use my pain and make it pleasant for someone else, that would make it more meaningful.” She was breathing heavily.

She was inviting him to listen to said pain. “Well, it sounds like your prayers have been answered. I hope the rest of your evening bodes well.” He started to walk away.

Lenna reached out to him, her hand hovering in the air. “It’s just been so hard, without Bubbles.”

A slow inhale, but he made sure that it was inaudible. He swallowed a lump in his throat, and relaxed all of his muscles. Maybe he could get away with being a little truthful. “Yes, you being without your cat is truly a misery.”

“Yes. She was family, Bubbles.” Another sob. She was going to start wailing again.

“Yes.” He relaxed his muscles again. If he didn’t acknowledge the cat, then Lenna would surely start getting obnoxious. “Poor Bubbles.” The name sounded awkward and spiteful coming out of his lips. She didn’t notice.

“I just don’t know what to do. Bubbles was always there to sit on my lap when I was doing my homework. She slept with me. She always meowed when I came home from school.” The sobs were getting heavier. “Now, it’s just so quiet.”

This world was so small that the worst of this girl’s problems was the loss of something replaceable. “Perhaps another cat might be noisier?”

She was shocked into silence, her sobs stammering. “Excuse me?”

“I’m giving you a proposal. A solution to your problem. Then you can stop mewling.”

“But... she was family.”

“It was a cat.”

Lenna erupted into tears, the sound giving him a headache. She was so loud, it caught the attention of the nearby teenager, and leading them was a girl with long purple hair that reached down to her waist. She wore a bright blue shirt and a black beanie on her head.

“Lenna,” she said as she comforted her. “What happened?”

Lenna started to talk but she was completely incomprehensible through her sobbing. Her older sister, though, understood her perfectly.

“You made my sister cry, rich boy?” She shoved his shoulder. “Who do you think you are?”

“Faris, it’s good to see you, too.” Xehanort attempted to keep himself calm. This was just too annoying. “I was merely trying to get your sister to come to a more logical conclusion. To ease her personal grievances.”

“I don’t care for your fancy talk, so you better talk to me straight. What did you say to her?”

Lenna started to talk in her gibberish again, and Faris’ eyes flashed with anger.

“Our cat was family, and she was the most important thing to Lenna,” she said as she clenched her fists. “Something’s seriously wrong with you, Nort.”

Patience was low. “She was given advice, and she refused it. There could be so much more meaning to her life, and she doesn’t have the interest nor the ability to see it.”

Faris had nothing to say. She swung her arm and punched him squarely in the jaw.

Evening becomes morning again. The pain on his jawline quickly fades away. 

The others are sparring, with Sora and Riku taking pot shots so that Kairi can practice dodging and blocking them. Clearly she does best with handling attacks from afar and with magical offenses, perhaps because of the amount of time she has spent studying with Lea. But she staggers when either of the boys come close and hit her directly. Terra makes a mental note that he has to give her tips on how to maintain her core energy and stance when she gets nervous. Something to bring up when he has the chance to later.

Right now, however, something is off. Terra has been able to learn how to sense when Xehanort’s presence is getting stronger. It’s like having another person rest their head on his shoulder, watching him that closely. The headaches start at his forehead, and then it trickles so it feels as though his hair is being pulled out. But this time, there is nothing.

This memory isn’t like the others. He likes to show off, or he tries to provoke me. But this was almost embarrassing to watch. I must have seen this vision without his involvement and... did he not notice this?

Terra looks down on his hands and breathes deeply. I know he can see what I can physically see. He can hear what I hear, and he can feel my strong emotions. But if this is a vision I had on my own... can he not see what’s in my mind?

He closes his hands and eyes and relaxes. Lenna. Faris. No pain. He thinks of Lenna again. How hard she was crying when she lost her cat. How insensitive he was to her.

Even as a teenager, all he did was hurt people. And because I was too weak to stop him, he’s done worse to them.

He shudders. This truth is hard to swallow and it nearly sickens him. I can’t call myself a Keyblade wielder if I can’t help others and heal their pain. That is the biggest reason why I delved into this calling. I had no meaning until Master gave it to me.

It’s time to get to the bottom of this.

He jogs through the sand and approaches the others. “Have any of you heard of two people living in this world named Lenna and Faris?” A headache starts to form like a gut reaction to his words, confirming his suspicions.

Sora is the first to recall his Keyblade. “Lenna and Faris? That makes me think of those old ladies who played checkers on the side of that road we used to take to go to school.”

“Hmm.” Riku smirks. “Old-fashioned names, then.”

“Would they help us find Aqua or something?” Kairi asks, her tone a bit skeptical, as if she isn’t sure why two random people from a tiny island would be of any use.

“No.” Terra realizes his answer is too short, but this is strange to open up about. “I... I’ve never met them actually, but I have to make amends to them.”

The three of them give him undeniable expressions of confusion, with Sora in particular narrowing his eyes and wrinkling his nose. “That’s weird. It’s like this came out of nowhere-”

A pregnant pause. It doesn’t come out of nowhere, and all of them know it. Terra cringes as he sees them realize this, hoping that none of them are wondering if these pseudo-psychic episodes will become more frequent or more erratic. He doesn’t know what to say. I hope they don’t consider me more dangerous now.

Sora seems the most uncomfortable about it, darting his eyes around the sand and displaying a rare seriousness that simply doesn’t fit him. He quickly glances to both of his friends to see if he can read them. Then, his eyes light up and a smile stretches from ear to ear. 

“It’s a strange request, for sure. We just don’t understand what’s possessing you.”

Riku bursts into laughter, the kind of tear-jerking hysteria that would leave anyone else unable to think - Terra has never seen this in him before. Kairi elbows Sora in the ribs, her eyes wide with disbelief. The latter is too busy in his own bout of laughter to care.

Terra scoffs slowly and clenches his teeth a little, although he doesn’t deny to himself that he’s starting to chuckle as well. Ven would say something this dumb.

“And here I thought you were mature,” Terra says as he firmly ruffles through Sora’s incredibly thick hair.

“I am mature.” Sora rubs his nose and attempts to fix his hairdo.

“Why these specific women, though?” Riku regains his composure and returns to his confident posture with one hand on his hip, as if he hasn’t been laughing this entire time. “What do they have to do with anything?”

There is no way to answer this without being direct. Terra crosses his arms and forces himself to relax. “Xehanort is from here.”

The shock is so great that Riku slowly drops the hand that before was so proud to be resting on his hip. It makes sense, though. Xehanort once called the Land of Departure his home and didn’t care that it got destroyed, either.

Kairi leans forward. “So you’re telling us that we can meet people who grew up with him?“ She gasps and holds a hand to her mouth. “I wonder what he was like as a kid.”

Not much different.

“Would he have gone to the same school as us?” Sora asks out loud. “What am I saying, of course he would have. There is only one.” He fidgets with excitement. “We’ve got to find these ladies.”

Sora and Kairi look over to Riku as if they need his permission to go. Riku takes his time to answer, enough for Terra to wonder if he is stalling on purpose to make them feel anticipation. “I like the idea. We should search for them.”

“I knew it was a good idea to come here. Let’s go.” Sora does an about-face and leaves, with Riku following closely behind. Terra starts to follow them, but notices that Kairi is still standing there, her hands behind her with a contemptuous smile on her face.

He lifts his shoulder as if to ask her what’s wrong, when Sora calls out from behind him. “Hey, what gives?”

“What gives is that you are going the wrong direction.” She creates finger-guns and points in the opposite way, her tone dramatically sarcastic. “I hid a boat by the beach on the other side for when we come back.” She waves her arms around. “I was just seeing how long it would take you guys to notice that I wasn’t around. Thanks, Terra, for waiting for me.”

Riku slowly closes his eyes as if he is guilty of something, while Sora’s mouth hangs open. “Wait, Kairi-”

“Too late.” She grabs Terra by the wrist and pulls him in the correct direction. “I don’t want either of you two losers to sit next to me.”

The main island is larger, filled with homes and small facilities and markets. One side of it features a beach while the other is raised, the ocean water hitting the rocky terrain that make up the cliff side there. 

But it’s still very small, with an endless ocean surrounding the town that stretches beyond the horizon. Such a tiny world means that the setting is intimate and safe. All of the inhabitants know each other - a feature that Sora doesn’t think matters. Everyone apparently knows that the three of them have left to visit other worlds, so who cares if they brought in a stranger?

Terra brushes off his own concerns, not the least of which is the part where he simply has to accept that times have changed. Some worlds have been exposed to the outside, much like how Radiant Garden has, and there is nothing that can be done to undo that. Master Eraqus would grow a headache over this.

The news that a stranger has visited the island spread like wildfire. Friends from their school flock around him. Kairi’s friends in particular demand why she is keeping a hottie like him all to herself. It takes a considerable amount of effort to keep anyone from touching Aqua’s Keyblade.

So they decide that it’s best Terra leaves the town altogether. He takes this opportunity to give more lessons to Kairi as they spar among some isolated trees, while Sora and Riku track down Lenna and Faris’ whereabouts.

They take a break. Kairi stays quiet, probably mulling over his advice. They sit together atop a hill, where they can view the town - seeing it from here really emphasizes the tiny size of it. The ocean surrounding him might as well be an empty desert. 

Or perhaps there is world down in its depths that hasn’t been discovered yet. There has to be something more than just this town.

“Do you think I have what it takes to be any good?” he hears Kairi say next to him.

“Of course you do.” Being a Princess of Heart and all, if you have to protect yourself, so be it. “Why do you ask?“

She sighs forcefully. “Sometimes I don’t think Riku and Sora believe I can do anything for myself. They always leave me behind. And I mean, I get it. I’m not experienced like they are, but they continue to treat me the same. I’m not sure they trust me at all.”

“I think they trust you well enough. They left you alone with me after all.” A part of him tenses up. 

“They left me with you because they trust you.”

“I still don’t think it’s about you.” 

It’s very much like dealing with Ventus. He always asked the two of them if he could join along. Begging to be included. Begging to explore other worlds. Aqua being the one to be over-protective and to send him off. Terra being the one to encourage Ventus to spread out. 

Except that one time in Radiant Garden.

“Maybe they’re afraid they’ll fail to protect you,” he says. “It’s not a failure that’s easy to accept, you know.”

Kairi takes a moment of silence. “Yeah but, why does that mean that I can’t protect them when I want to?”

Terra chuckles. How many times have Aqua and I competed over this very same issue?

“I’m sure they bump heads over which one of them should be protected as well. It’s a never-ending argument, and truthfully it’s a give and take.” He smiles at her. “When the time is right, you’ll just have to step it up when they inevitably stumble.”

She grins to herself. She still has a long way to go, but she’s doing alright with fighting. 

He feels the wind blowing through his hair. Despite that the town is not too far, it’s quiet enough. The smell of the ocean is everywhere.

“It must get real dark here at night,” he says. “I’m sure you can see the stars very clearly.”

“The sky gets absolutely covered with them. You like the stars?”

“Yeah. It was our favorite past time, to go stargazing together.”

She excitedly claps her hands. “Then you have to bring them here when you find them.”

He smirks. “I will.”

It is a warming thought, just being able to bring the stars back to them. Not like being on their mountains exactly, but great enough. 

In the distance, nearer the cliffside, stands a solitary house that juts out far from the town. It’s a bit larger than the other homes, and something about it makes his stomach lurch. He attempts to ask her about it when Sora and Riku approach them from behind some trees.

“Did you find them?” Kairi stands up quickly.

“Yeah.” Riku scratches his head and doesn’t meet her gaze. “They are in the cemetery, out on the eastern cliff side.”

The three of them eye Terra. This doesn’t change a thing.

“Okay,” Terra says, “I’ll need a cat statue. You know, one of those outdoor types that you put in the dirt?” He reaches in his pockets. “I can give you the munny for it. I’ll also need pink and purple flowers.”

Kairi raises her hand. “I know where you can pluck those, actually.”

“Why don’t I go with you to get the flowers, Terra?” Sora asks.

“It was my idea,” she says.

“But I didn’t get to spend any time with him,” Sora whines. 

She places her hands on her hips and leans forward. “Excuse me, but I’d like to have a private conversation with him.” 

That shuts him up. The two boys leave with some of Terra’s munny, while he and Kairi walk south through some palm trees.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” he asks her.

“Oh nothing, actually. I’m still mad at the two of them.”

It isn’t a far walk, and they reach a small grassy field full of beautiful flowers, all of different colors. The sub-tropical weather really encourages such foliage. It’s easy to pick out the ones he wants, considering that each color seems to enjoy the company of its own.

“So you grew up with Aqua and Ventus?” she asks as they crouch over the flowers they are collecting.

“Ven’s the little brother I’ve always wanted.” A smile forms on his face. Thinking about Ventus always comforts him in a way, perhaps because there is less guilt involved. He remembers how delighted he was when Ventus woke up, and when Ventus started to follow him around like a puppy after it’s been rescued from starving.

He continues. “Aqua and I go way back. She and I were the ones who really grew up together. I don’t think I ever saw her as my sister. She’s my partner really. My sparring partner, my mission partner... she’s my best friend.”

“She must be really special to you, then.”

“Of course she is.” He notices a peculiar smile on Kairi’s face. She immediately tries to roll her lips to erase that look. 

What is making him to be so open about feelings?

Maybe it just isn’t worth keeping them hidden anymore, not after what I went through. Or maybe it’s something else. There’s something about Kairi that makes me feel like I’ve met her before.

They continue to gather flowers in silence, although Kairi is still smiling to herself. She has the bouquet of purple, while he finishes a thick bundle of pink. 

Just in time, Sora and Riku join them. The former is holding two white ribbons to tie the bundles together, while the latter carries a sizable statue depicting a cat sitting down with its tail wrapped around its body. The plan so far is going perfectly - although Riku has this comically sour look on his face.

“We were being followed and nagged by Tidus and Wakka,” Riku says when asked what’s wrong. He sets the statue down. “And Sora got the great idea to tell them that the cat statue was a gift for his mom.”

Sora deviously smiles, stretching from ear to ear. “It worked didn’t it?” He tries to suppress a laugh.

“Only because you told them that I’ve always had a crush on her.”

Kairi bursts into hysteria and Riku reminds her that it isn’t funny. She gives him tiny nods while doing her best not to continue laughing and then hugs him. This prompts Sora to hug the both of them from behind, so that Riku is pinned between their affections. His arms slack and he gives Terra a timid glare, pleading to be freed.

Terra picks up the statue. “I appreciate everything you do for me, Riku.”

The cemetery is quite possibly the noisiest area on the island. 

The wind is blowing harder here since it’s on higher ground, and the water is slamming against the rocks below. It’s not the largest graveyard that he’s seen, a testament to the size of the population on this island. Most of the gravestones here are humble. Plaques are placed specifically for Lenna and Faris, who both passed away a few years ago and were buried next to each other. Weeds are overgrowing on them, and Terra rips them out and dusts off the falling dirt with his hands. Sora gives him a spade, and with it he digs a small hole by Lenna’s plaque to fit the cat statue. 

When he’s done, he sets pink flowers down for Lenna, and purple ones for Faris.

Sora, Riku and Kairi stand behind him, staying quiet. He kneels in front of their graves, taking a short moment to meditate. Death isn’t the sort of thing that Keyblade wielders deal with often, although they are taught that it is a natural part of life that shouldn’t be hated. It isn’t darkness, despite the pain it causes. Despite that it can compel someone to abhor it. 

One day, the light of Master Eraqus would have faded anyway. Terra has always assumed that the three of them would create a small, private ceremony in the mountains to celebrate his life when it should happen. To leave his Keyblade resting on the top of a summit. But his death didn’t have to happen the way it did.

I hope the both of you lived happy lives, fulfilled in the way you wanted them to. I’m sorry for the pain he caused you. I swear, on this day and every day moving forward, I will undo what he has done. I will make amends for his existence.

Terra breathes and touches their plaques before getting up. On this location, the solitary house is seems closer. It sits by itself, and Terra notices now that some of the windows are boarded up and there are vines growing up along the outer walls. There is that nauseating feeling in his stomach again. 

“What can you guys tell me about that house?” He points to it.

“It’s one of the few urban legends around here,” Sora says, putting his arms behind his head. “Some of the people think it’s haunted.”

“Why is that?”

“No one has been able to get inside. They can’t break in, and they can’t unlock it.”

Riku crosses his arms and thinks for a second. “If I remember correctly, that house belonged to an old couple. They died a long, long time ago. The husband was involved in most of the investments that built the homes and buildings here. The wife I think was a nurse, maybe?”

A headache swells, and the roots of his hair sting. “It’s his. He grew up there.”

“No way!” Sora nearly throws himself forward. “We’ve got to check it out.”

Riku scoffs. “Of course his house would be creepy.”

The house has two stories, which is quite rare to see on the island. It is surrounded by a small, overgrown garden, contained by a barrier of coral rocks that are supposed to act like a fence. All of the windows on the first floor have wooden boards covering them. 

Riku approaches the front door, and attempts to turn the knob. It doesn’t open. He kicks it, and an invisible force blocks the attempt. He summons his Keyblade, but it doesn’t unlock it.

“I’m going to assume that the windows are going to be the same and save myself the trouble,” he says.

Kairi has her hands in a prayer stance in front of her. “But who would put a spell on this house?”

Riku’s fists are clenched together. “This implies that Xehanort has visited after he left. Maybe to seal off his old home... or for other things.”

They all hear an incredibly loud sigh. Sora is pouting, like a child in dire need of candy. “How are we going to open it then?”

The headache is more painful now, and Terra shivers for a bit. There is a slight disgust to knowing the kinds of information that are seamlessly appearing in his consciousness. Things he shouldn’t know, but are there.

“You just need the right key,” he says. He counts the rocks on the left side of the door. Seven of them. He lifts it, and under it is a simple house key. The perfect key to unlock this door.

Sunlight seeps through the cracks of the wooden boards covering the window, and Terra leaves the door open to allow more. The house is quaint, with plenty of decorative art and plates lining the pastel pink walls. In the center is a family-sized dining room table, covered in an off-white cloth. A pot of withered flowers sits in the middle. An upright piano is left alone next to a window that overlooks the ocean, and beyond that is a small kitchen, with some incredibly outdated appliances such as a fire stove. 

In all senses, it’s as though time has stopped in this house.

“That is definitely him,” Riku says.

On the far wall opposite the piano, alongside some shelves, are family photos. They are all sepia-toned, and every single one of them is a photo of Xehanort throughout his young life. As a baby. As a toddler. One of the bigger portraits is himself as a teen, his round eyes looking straight at the camera. It’s impossible to tell what he was thinking when it was taken.

Riku takes his time to study each photo. “So the stories I have heard about a kid who left this world has always been about him.”

Kairi grabs two thick photo albums from a shelf nearby and brings them to the table. “Looks like there’s more here.”

She gives the smaller one to Sora. He sifts through it while holding it close to him, looking bewildered.

“Here is one of him as a baby... can you just imagine Xehanort as a cute, chubby baby?” He shudders. “Look at this! Here is one of him laughing.”

Riku and Terra look over his shoulder. A picture of a teenage Xehanort laughing as he is facing someone that isn’t in the shot. The laugh seems genuine, his eyes squinting. Other pictures show him on a bicycle with classmates. At a birthday party. One shows him dressed nicely, his arm locked with a girl in a pretty dress, like he is taking a date to a school dance. Not a single one depicts him as any older.

“I wonder what he was laughing about,” Sora says.

I wonder if it was sincere.

“Oh guys, here are letters his mother wrote to him. This must have been after he left,” Kairi says, reaching the end of the photo album she’s looking through, where a short stack of handwritten letters have been tucked away.

Terra walks over to the piano as she reads through them, listening closely to a relic left behind by someone who no longer walks:

“My dearest son, I sincerely hope you retrieve this letter. I have sent several to you and I suppose that they haven’t reached you. I know your teacher has said that it was completely possible for us to keep in touch, and has given me the instructions to do so. I pray that you are safe and happy in your newfound school and residence. I miss the sound of you playing the piano very dearly. The emptiness and silence left behind by your absence is unbearable, but it helps to ease the pain when I remember that you are following your dreams. My beloved son, I would love to hear about what you are studying, if you have been making friends, and if you are having the adventures you deserve to have. I just want to hear your voice. I want to hold you in my arms. I want to see how handsome you have grown to be. Be safe, and I love you, Your worried mother.”

He hears her shuffling through more letters behind him as he eyes the keys on the piano, dusty from neglect.

“They’re all alike,” she says. “She’s been dying to hear from him.”

Riku clears his throat. “I think we should definitely visit our moms today.”

Terra strums some keys in succession, gently but confidently enough that there is no way anyone can tell he is a beginner at it. He continues to strum in higher octaves, practicing arpeggios - 

Arpeggios? I shouldn’t know that word.

“You play the piano?” Sora asks from behind him.

Terra turns quickly and rubs his fingers against his palm, his hand clammy. His head is pounding, and for a moment he nearly says yes.

“No, I don’t.” He rubs his palms against his pants, and a knowledge of musical theory starts to flood his mind. He has never studied music.

I’m not sure where I end and where he starts. If we’re exchanging information like this, does that mean that I’m being swallowed up by him?

“Then you must be a natural,” Sora says with a smile, not noticing his mood. “You know, I wonder if he still has stuff here, like in his room.” His eyes widen as he stares off into space. “Do you think he has a diary?”

Sora and Riku both stare intensely at each other, as though a golden idea has been blessed upon them. Sora drops the photo album, and races up the stairs, Riku and Kairi following behind.

Terra lingers for a moment by the piano, caressing his sweaty forehead.

I am in control. I’m in control.

He opens Tifa’s potion and takes a sip before walking up the stairs. 

The others are going room by room, but he knows where it is. It is to the right, slightly behind the opening to the stairs. It looks like a normal room for any kid, although the walls are completely blank. There is a bed, a closed closet, a bedside table, a desk for studying, and a dresser. The windows overlook the town ahead. On the dresser is a framed picture of Xehanort, with a couple of bundles of withered flowers.

“I wonder if his mom has been waiting for him to come home all this time,” Kairi says when she enters the room and sees the shrine set up for him.

Sora and Riku check through his desk and dresser, hoping to find some notes or a journal he may have written in. Kairi opens his closet.

“He really liked to dress fancy.” She sifts through vests, button-down shirts, jackets, and leather. She bends down to open up a bookbag, and takes out a texbook. She laughs and lifts it up to show the others. “Our school hasn’t updated any of the books for the last few decades, it seems.”

“Figures,” Sora says as he makes his way to the bedside table. He opens a drawer there and shuffles through it. Not finding anything, he closes it and moves over to where Riku is.

But he was so close. Terra opens that same drawer and moves his hand to feel directly under the surface. The journal is there, taped to the underside.

“You missed it.” He pulls a small, black leather journal and hands it over to Riku, who is closest to him.

Riku flips through some of the pages while Sora hops on top of the bed, and Kairi sits beside him. He reads a passage to himself, his eyebrows wrinkling up towards his crown.

“Sheesh. Listen to this: I grow tired of the mindless queries shared by my peers. I long to meet a worthy companion, anyone out there, that has the power to quench this horrid starvation for knowledge that I am burdened with. I need to leave this forsaken island...”

“I should give him a kick in the face for saying that about our island,” Sora says with a grin. “He’s the same, actually. No wonder he didn’t have any friends.”

“It’s not a wonder why,” Kairi says. She looks as though she has swallowed something disgusting. “Ugh, he had such an awful superiority complex.”

Sora laughs and then consciously changes the expression on his face, as though he is putting on a mask. He contorts his fingers and begins an act, like he is in a theatrical drama. “Denizens of light, answer this. Why do you hate the darkness?”

Riku snorts and lowers the diary. “Surrender. Bow to darkness. Only the darkness can offer to you all of the strength that you will need.”

It isn’t exactly comfortable hearing such words - they are too similar. But it’s true, he hasn’t changed at all. Terra deepens his voice so that it sounds a bit goofy. “Light and darkness, they are a balance - one that must always be maintained.”

“Is that how he justifies all of this?” Riku shakes his head. He flips through more pages of the journal. “They are already balanced. I thought he was smart.”

“Honestly, I don’t really understand what his primary goals were. Not even now.” Terra squeezes a fist and lets it go. No use getting angry, especially since the headache hasn’t faded.

Riku stops at a page and points to it. “The journal isn’t complete, but here’s the last entry: I’ve wondered for some time now whether there were other dimensions tucked away among the stars, hiding vast amounts of information that I want to grasp. These suspicions have been confirmed. A man from somewhere else visited the island today, accompanied by a boy. I came to him with all of my questions, and he said that I have the heart to serve a higher calling: to give others answers. I accepted his challenge.  The boy is inquisitive. Friendly, but quick to scrutinize, and comes from a long lineage of protectors. If he is to be my competitor, I believe I can manage and surpass him. My mother will surely resist, but never again will I return here...”

It feels as though Terra’s throat constricts. The air around him becomes thick and he finds it hard to breathe. A boy? The Master. This is a record of the first time they have ever met.

“And then he goes off to ruin everyone’s lives.” Terra fails to keep his tone calm, and the others are shocked by such anger.  He lowers his voice. “He had parents and a good home. He had a friend who adored him. And he took it all for granted.”

I’m being stupid. It’s not like he cares about what I think.

It’s too stuffy in that room. He waves his arm to dismiss the others’ concerns and briskly exits. 

Down the stairs, he stops by the open photo album Sora left behind. There is a family portrait depicting Xehanort as a child. His father stands behind him, also bearing darker skin and white hair. His mother sits by him and has her arm rested on his shoulder. Terra picks the album up, and studies it. Xehanort’s mother was very pretty, hair long and swept to the side, and it looks like she had her son young.

“He came home,” he says quietly before setting it down.

The high afternoon sun beats down on him outside, and he makes his way to some shade under a cluster of palm trees a few paces away from the house. They bear the star-shaped fruit that Aqua once talked about so long ago. He leans on one of them, and closes his eyes to focus on the fresh air that he’s breathing. 

He pulls out his Wayfinder, and meditates on his friends. His mind focuses on Ventus in particular - on all the ordinary days they spent together studying, playing pranks on Aqua, and sparring. As much as he cherishes his time with Aqua and as much as he wants to spend the rest of his waking life with her, the days where Ventus has entered their lives are still the best days. It’s not worth it without the three of them together. He’s sure that she would agree. 

Thinking about their separation is saddening, but it’s better than being in that house.

The others approach him as he’s daydreaming. Riku offers the suggestion to get some coconuts, since they’re all thirsty.

“That sounds delicious,” he replies.

“Okay, but I get to stay with Terra this time,” Sora says with a finger lifted up, as if to lecture them.

Riku mumbles just enough for only Terra to hear. “It’s like he’s a puppy around you.”

He and Kairi disappear through the trees, and Sora seems like he just can’t contain his excitement, like his smile is permanently plastered on his face.

Riku’s right. He is like a puppy.

“Let me ask you something, Sora. You can wield two Keyblades at the same time, right?”

“Yeah, but I don’t know where it comes from. It’s very temporary, and it comes when I need a burst of power. But it doesn’t always work.” Sora places a hand on his heart.

“What does that mean?”

“Sometimes...” His expressions just seem so solemn in comparison when he isn’t happy. “Sometimes it’s like things go dark when I call upon the second Keyblade. Maybe it’s because I need power to do it or it thinks I’m being selfish when I summon it. I don’t know. But it’s very tiring, anyway.”

Terra clenches his jaw. Perhaps it really is dangerous to use Xehanort’s Keyblade. Not that it’s a loss. He tells himself that he is fine with just his own.

Sora leans on one of the trees next to him, eyeing the Wayfinder in his hand. “It’s interesting that it’s the shape of a star,” he says.

Terra holds the Wayfinder higher so that the both of them can look at it. “Aqua made one for each of us after reading about this very island. She said that it symbolized an unbreakable connection, and cast magic on it so that we can always stay close. She said that they’re usually made of shells, and that they resemble the star-shaped fruit on this island.” 

“She’s very right about all of that.” Sora points upward to the star-shaped fruit above them. “The paopu fruit does represent an unbreakable connection, but it’s a bit more than that.”

“How so?”

“When you share a paopu fruit with someone, it’s supposed to be like a promise that you make with that person - that your destinies will always intertwine. So it’s like a promise that you’ll be connected in the future.” 

Terra eyes the fruit above, wishing to share one with Aqua. It’s as though Sora has read his mind.

“Would you like me to grab you one?” Sora already starts to climb the palm tree, as though he knows the answer is yes.

“Do you have to share one with only one person?”

Sora reaches the top and uses his ankles as grips to keep himself stable. “You mean that you’d share this with someone else who isn’t Aqua?”

Something about that tone seems to suggest that Sora knows, and it’s just the tiniest bit annoying. It’s like listening to Ventus tease him about her. “What are you getting at?”

“How about you stop answering my questions with questions?” Sora inspects one of the fruit and grabs it, a devious grin on his face.

Terra laughs silently. It feels like déja vu, where he and Ventus have this song and dance together every time she is brought up. “How about you mind your own business?”

“Well I think sharing this fruit with her is the perfect idea.”

“You continue about Aqua and I’ll knock you off that tree.” 

“You can try.” As though he’ll never fall from it. He leans down to hand Terra the fruit. Then he stretches his reach to grab another.

Terra holds his Wayfinder in his left hand and strokes it. He forgets in that moment that he’s separated from them. It must be a magical quality that Sora has.

However, Sora doesn’t have the grip on that tree that he thinks he has. He grabs the second fruit when he leans too far, and falls off the tree with a yell. He lands on his back, a paopu fruit in one hand and a palm leaf in the other - a failed attempt to break his fall.

“Sora!” Terra runs over and offers his right hand. “You okay?”

Sora groans loudly and grabs his hand. But it isn’t Sora anymore. 

Terra is holding Ventus’ hand, and it is Ventus’ voice that replies - that enters his consciousness and makes him realize the truth - as he smiles up at him.

“Thanks, Terra, for looking out for me.”

Terra freezes, shaking a little as he holds Ventus’ hand. It’s Ven. His little brother.

Ventus looks confused. Out of his mouth comes Sora’s voice: “Are you okay?”

He is holding Sora’s hand, who is still on the ground. They have been staring at each other for an undefined amount of time. Ventus has been this close to him this entire time.

Terra starts laughing hysterically, and pulls Sora up to him so they can hug. Sora is taller than Ventus, but he still has to bend down to embrace him. He continues to laugh, and Sora laughs in return.

“This is cool and all, but I’m not sure what this is about,” Sora says.

He cannot say anything - Xehanort will hear. But it’s fine, Ventus is safe. He’s in the safest place he can ever be without Terra or Aqua there to protect him.

“What’s going on here?” Riku’s voice comes from the trees. He and Kairi are each holding two open coconuts with straws inside.

“I don’t know,” Sora says, “but I like hugs.”

Terra lets go and wipes the tears from his eyes. “It’s just that Sora makes me happy.” He pauses for a moment. Ventus is okay. But being caught in such an emotional outburst is now awkward. “You all make me happy.”

He bends to hug Riku as well, who holds out the open coconuts further, so as not to spill them. “What are you doing?” he asks.

“I’m hugging you.” Several more chuckles escape Terra’s mouth.

“You’re such a sap.”

Kairi snaps a little. “Riku, he’s been through a lot. Everyone needs a hug every now and then.”

As if on cue, Terra hugs her as well. She smiles widely and returns it, careful not to spill the coconut water all over. Then she hands one to him. Terra sits in the shade, slightly unaware of his immediate surroundings. Laughing until his stomach hurts. 

Ventus is sleeping and his heart has been inside Sora this entire time. He has been worrying over what, exactly? All he needs now is to find Aqua, so they can find his body. Then they’ll be together again.

He hears Riku ask Sora, “What exactly happened?”

“I fell from that tree and he thought it was hilarious.”

Terra takes small sips of the coconut water. He can’t drink too much because he’s giggling too hard. The others sit by him and listen to him go on without interrupting. The breeze blows, and this day can be more amazing if only Aqua and Ventus are there, laughing alongside him.

Terra has most of his armor on, his helmet waiting patiently in his hands. They give him a sack to hold the two paopu fruit. The mid-afternoon sun is still shining hard, but soon Terra will bid farewell to it and fly off to Radiant Garden.

“I promised I would deliver a package to Traverse Town for them,” he tells Sora and Riku. Kairi has already said her good-byes and left to spend time with her adoptive family here.

The smile on Sora’s face slowly flips upside down. “That’s right. We have to be there tonight.”

Terra remembers being told that there is a terrible Heartless attack every two nights there. “You don’t want to go?”

Sora sighs. “There are lots of other worlds I should be visiting. Like Twilight Town for example. My friends there are scared because Heartless invasions haven’t stopped and they don’t have a military to protect them. And I have friends in lots of other worlds that need help, too.”

“You don’t have to go there tonight,” Riku says. “If Terra will be there, then we can handle it on our own.” His best friend insists, but Riku holds his hand up and cuts him off. “I’m positive we’ll be fine.”

Sora nods and fist-bumps with Terra. “Til next time.”

“It seems like this was time well-spent,” Riku tells Terra when they are alone. “I’m glad Sora made you laugh, you really needed it.”

It truly is like a heavy weight being released from his chest. The headache is gone. “He has a very special gift, I’ll say that. That’s why I want to ask you to keep him safe, in case I don’t make it. Keep him away from me if I get dangerous.”

“You’ll make it.” Riku sounds quieter than normal. It’s probably be that he, too, is worried about that. It’s probably that he wants to be admired by Terra as well.

Terra holds his successor’s shoulder and gently squeezes it. “I’m very proud I chose you.”

Riku doesn’t meet his gaze, but he smiles. “I’ll see you tonight.”

Terra’s Keyblade transforms into his glider. Relaxed and ready to tackle his current responsibilities, he almost feels normal. Like he is going on a mission on any other typical day. 

This is the first time since waking up that getting his family back seems possible for him. He flies outward, leaving behind that tiny island - that small safe haven, that small blessing - alone and amid such a large, empty ocean.