#I have too many jumbled thoughts on the matter

[meelusinee]

HEAVEN IS A PLACE ON EARTH WITH YOU ★ R.B X J.P X READER

in which you and regulus escape to james' house after a failed house party (no thanks given to walaburga in this house <3)

pairing: regulus black x james potter x reader word count: 2.4k warnings: drunk reader at the end, but that's it

author's note: i wanted to get a quick one out there just for funsies, so I thought why not these two? thank's so much for the support to everyone who's liked and commented and followed too!!!

It's you, it's you, it's all for you Everything I do I tell you all the time Heaven is a place on earth with you Tell me all the things you wanna do I heard that you like the bad girls Honey, is that true?

HEAVEN IS A PLACE ON EARTH WITH YOU | REGULUS BLACK X JAMES POTTER X  READER

James Potter and Regulus Black were complete opposites.

Regulus Black was a prim and proper man. The second heir to the Black family, the most prestigious Pureblood family within the Sacred 28. An excellent seeker with an eye as sharp as a needle, easily able to pick a Snitch out of thin air. Neat and professional, always tailored to perfection no matter when or where you look at him. Quiet and calculated, able to do anything to someone all in the drop of a hat.

James Potter was a messy and muddy man. The only heir to the Potter household, a home full of love and warmth ever since it came together. An excellent Chaser able to throw Quaffles as easy as blinking his eyes. Cocky yet charming, jumbled in a way that was endearing to many no matter when or where you look at him. Loud in a friendly way, able to befriend anything all in the drop of a hat.

Even still, they had their faults.

That fault was always you.

Regulus found himself growing bolder within your presence, his journal full of scattered and obsessive thoughts about anything to do with you. The way your face shines in the sun, or the way it gets even brighter whenever you smile. He often found himself giving you small flower crowns or trinkets, like a worshipper worshiping its deity.

James, however, found himself growing calmer within your presence. His head was full of nothing whenever he was around you, nothing more than static he wished he always had running through his mind whenever he was out in public. He often found himself giving you more affection than anyone could think possible, like a sloth latching onto a tree branch for his nap.

Even though they were opposites, you brought out the best in both of them. And in return, they saw each other in a way they felt almost no one else could. Every kiss to you meant a kiss to Regulus for James. And every thought about you meant a thought about James to Regulus.

Which led them both to where they were right now, both with you in a way that made their hearts soar.

Regulus and you were both sitting in the backyard of the Potter Manor. Nobody else was home right now, but the both of you needed an escape from the party going on at Regulus’ house.

Which led you both here, listening to the car engine running through the streets and closer to you two. The sun was shining down on the backyard field, pollen and small dandelion fluffs running through the air and itching both of your noses.

Your heads turned as you heard the door of the car close, a small whistling tune ringing in your ears as whoever was driving got closer to you.

James. 

You chuckled softly as he dramatically turned around the corner, both of you watching as he ran up to the both of you much like a golden retriever.

“Reggie!” he smiled, leaning down dramatically and kissing his forehead before moving to yours. “Oh how I’ve missed you, my love. And you too, Y/N. I missed you as well, don’t you forget it.” 

“We won’t, Jamie.” you whispered, kissing his lips. “Do you have any beers?”

“If my dad doesn’t count his stash.” James said mischievously, his hand patting your head before he rushed off to get three cans. “I’ll be back!”

You and Regulus both giggled, his body scooting closer to yours as you watched James run off. Regulus’ hands moved to wrap around your waist, his fingers messing with the belt of your sundress. “You’re absolutely beautiful.”

“You’re an utter sap.” you giggled, your head resting on his shoulder.

Your lips rested on his cheek as his hands toyed with your belt, the both of you watching as James ran back out of the house with three beers and three swimsuits. 

“What on Earth is he doing?” Regulus asked incredulously, a small smile on his face.

“We should go to the pool!” he said, running up to you both out of breath. “We could go swimming, or we could maybe play a game. What do you say?”

You and Regulus turned to each other before giggling at James’ ridiculousness, the two of you getting up to walk to the pool.

The sun was shining down on the pool as Regulus and James sank into the water, James’  arms wrapping around Regulus to help him swim.

“It’s not that bad, baby.” he whispered, chuckling softly. “You can still stand even in the deep end!”

“It’s water!” he hissed slightly, the water freezing against his skin. “I could drown. Do you want me dead, James? Drowned and buried?” 

“You’re not going to drown.” James chuckled, his thumbs caressing his waist. “I’ve got you.”

Regulus was about to complain again before his eyes darted over to the entrance of the pool, his eyes widening slightly as he watched you walking towards the pool.

You still had your sundress on, a small tray of fruit in your hands as you put it at the edge of the pool. “Are you two having fun?”

“Massive fun.” James chuckled, placing a kiss on Regulus’ cheek. “Right?”

Regulus nodded, his hand rapidly slapping James’ back as you moved to take your dress off. Your fingers moved to untie the belt holding it up, the zip falling down as it fell off your body. Your hands grabbed your swimsuit as you put it on, a pattern similar to your sundress.

Regulus and James were both staring at you, eyes widened and jaws dropped down to the floor. 

Regulus absolutely loved the way you looked, at least 20 different poem lines or song lyrics running through his mind as he stared at you. Like you were a holy and divine being he worshiped.

And James was looking at you like a ray of sunshine or field of flowers. How could something like you exist in the same world as he did?

You turned around and chuckled softly at the look on their faces, your body moving to slowly wade into the pool. “Hey there, you two.”

“Hi.” Regulus whispered, clearing his throat before saying it again. “Hi, mon amour.” 

“Hi there, baby.” James whispered, letting Regulus stand in the water so they both could wade towards you and cover you in kisses. 

“You’re both the best.” you chuckled softly at them, wrapping yourself around James and leaning in for a kiss before doing the same for Regulus. “I love both of you, do you know that?”

“Yes, we do.” Regulus whispered, kissing your jaw as James’ buried his nose against your hair. “Meethee, are you wearing perfume?”

“Perfume?” you asked, before nodding. “That vanilla one you like. Do you still like it?”

“Oh, mon cœur. The woman that you are.” Regulus whispered softly at that, taking a small scent of the perfume before pulling your lips in for another kiss. “Merlin, I love you so much.” 

“I did it for you,” you whispered, giggling as you felt James kissing your neck. “That tickles!”

“All for us?” he whispered, looking up at you with a gaze so sweet you could melt it like molten candy. “You’re so good to us, you know?”

“Says you.” you giggled.

“What on Earth even happened at his parent’s house in the first place?” James asked you confusedly, looking over at Regulus who had drunken over three beers in twenty minutes. He was standing under the pool shower now, his hair dripping water as he stood in it.

“Lots of yelling and stuff.” you whispered, frowning softly at Regulus’ state. “Plus, Bellatrix was acting like, well, Bellatrix. You know how she is.” 

“Maybe he needs to drink it off?” James whispered, looking at you. Neither of you liked Regulus drinking, though you did know it was a way for him to cope. And until he could escape the hellhole he lived in, it was what worked for him.

“Muggle bar?” you asked him curiously.

“Muggle bar.” James nodded at you.

The both of you got out of the pool and walked over to Regulus, playing with the shower nozzle for a minute or two before drying everyone off.

“Do you want to head to a bar, Regulus?” James whispered, his fingers running through his hair.

“A muggle bar?” Regulus whispered, his eyes shining slightly as he looked up at him.

“Yeah.” James smiled.

Regulus sniffled dramatically, hugging James tight. “You love me so much, don’t you?”

“Both of us do.” you whispered, nails gently scratching at his back. “We love you, ‘kay? We’ll stay sober so you can get drunk, as long as you take a Wiggenweld Potion after we get home.”

“And a Sobering Potion too.” he promised, kissing your forehead lovingly. “Thank you, my love.” 

“Don’t thank us.” you whispered, helping the both of them walk up to James’ room so you could all get ready for the bar.

“Is James going to stay sober?” Regulus whispered softly to you, watching as James looked through his shirt collection. His eyes unabashedly traced the muscles of his back, smiling softly at the sight.

“I think so. He doesn’t like getting drunk, you know how he is.” you chuckled softly. “A big health nut he is, don’t you think?”

“Definitely.” Regulus whispered, turning to you with a curious expression. “Are you going to get drunk with me, pretty girl? I have extra potions if you need.”

“If I ask James, maybe.” you whispered, before pouting softly at Regulus. “As long as I don’t get the vodka you like. It burns.”

“Of course not.” he whispered, kissing your forehead. “I’ll get you all the drinks you love.” 

“I’m going to beat you!” yoh slurred, the pool stick in your hand swaying slightly as you angled it to the white ball. “Just you wait, Reggie.”

“You’re going to try, pretty.” he chuckled softly at you. He was holding his alcohol a lot better than you were. “And then you’re going to be sad when you lose, y’know that?”

“Nuh uh.” you said, giggling softly as James walked up behind you and helped you line the stick up.

“That’s cheating!” Regulus chuckled, leaning against the table. 

James chuckled softly as you started drunkenly bumbling, taking over the pool stick and hitting the ball against the others. “Look babes, you’re solid.”

“I’m solid?” you asked, looking up at him as you pulled him into a hug. “I think I’m starry.”

“Starry?” James asked, kissing your forehead as he watched Regulus shoot his shot. He shot about three in a row, impressive for how many drinks he had already. “How are you starry?”

“Because you’re giving me a hug, and it’s starry.” you whispered, giggling as you bounced over to Regulus. “You make me starry too!”

Regulus chuckled softly at your drunkenness, realizing rather quickly that you probably wouldn’t be able to play pool nor darts. He still didn’t mind entertaining you though. “Did you know my name is based off of a star?”

“It is?” you asked, clapping your hands together. “We’re stars together!”

“Yes we are, mon cœur.” he chuckled softly.

“And Jamie has to come with us too.” you whispered softly, looking over at James. “I don’t want him feeling left out, okay?”

“Of course he can come with us.” Regulus chuckled softly to you. “He’s like the sun.”

“The sun!” you giggled softly, before stumbling into Regulus’ arms. “Sorry Reggie.”

“It’s okay, just be careful next time pretty,” he whispered, smirking softly. “You wanna watch me beat James’ ass in pool?”

“Yeah!” you giggled.

James had been smiling the entire night, ever since he saw you two in his backyard.

You were wearing a different dress, one that was black and a bit puffier at the end of it. Regulus was wearing all black attire as well, a black silk shirt with black slacks and Doc Martens. Right now, the both of you were standing by the bar, sticking out like a sore thumb in a crowd of people who looked a little better than average.

You were both absolutely beautiful. And absolutely wasted.

“I think this is going to be your final drink.” he whispered softly, grabbing you by the waist when you sat next to him.

“What?” you whined, looking over at Regulus. “Why is he cutting us off?”

Regulus shrugged, taking a sip of his drink as he looked at James with puppy eyes.

“Nope, not falling for it.” James muttered, dramatically tossing his head to the ceiling. “We’re going to get you two your potions and then we’re going to head home, no ifs, ands, or buts.”

“On the contrary to the message you are trying to spread,” Regulus slurred out, hiccuping at the end. “I believe we should be able to consume alcoholic beverages however long we want.”

“And I believe that I don’t want you sick tomorrow.” James said, looking down at Regulus. “Don’t make me do it.”

“You won’t!” you gasped audibly.

“I would.” he said sternly, putting as serious of an expression he could on. “Don’t test me.”

“No, no!” Regulus said. “We’ll go.”

“Good.” James said, chuckling softly as the both of you stumbled to put your glasses back at the bar. Oh how he loved you two.

“Okay, who’s in bed first?” James asked, looking at both you and Regulus in matching pajamas.

“I believe that it’s your turn for mutual cuddles.” you mumbled sleepily, patting the bed down for James to get in. “Go on Jamie.”

“Oh,” James nodded, looking down at the bed before smiling. “My turn it is.”

“Your turn it is.” Regulus hummed, crawling in and wrapping his arms around James. You were much more uncivilized, wrapping your entire being around him contently. 

The lights turned of magically as you all got comfortable in the bed, small sighs escaping your mouths as your eyes closed. Regulus’ grip tightened ever so slightly, his hand grasping yours in his sleep. Your body stayed wrapped around James, though your calf somewhat covered Regulus’ leg.

And James was content laying in the middle and spread like a starfish, smiling as he listened to the both of your breathing gently. James wouldn’t have this any other way. 

AUTHOR'S NOTE

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH POST OF THE CENTURY (really its not) i'm waiting for my amazing poll votes to come through, so i'm currently just posting up whatever on earth feels like posting before i head out for the day. thank you guys so much for the support it geniunely means so much!!!

AS ALWAYS please like and comment and reblog and all of that snazzy snaz snaz, and i hope you have an excellent day!

[impossible-rat-babies]

uhhhh weird eyrie lore today is: death and eyrie are haunting each other

[angel-sweets666]

Wrong photo!

AGED UP AGED UP BRO NO PEDOS

Denki kaminari x fem!reader

You accidentally send Denki a photo of your tits instead of homework, you didn’t expect him to send his dick back

mdi

a/n okay so this is inspired by a post I saw, I forgot the name of the blog but if someone knows can you put the name in the comments? Inspired by this text message thing where you accidentally send mha boys nudes

warning: swearing ,nudes, oral m and f, boobie sucking, fingering 🙏🙏

ALL CREDS GOING TO THE INSPIRED CREATOR

You groan and slam your head onto the table in frustration. This homework was impossible; no matter how many times you went over it, the answers just wouldn’t come. The jumble of equations and theories seemed to mock you from the pages of your textbook.

Grumbling, you pulled out your phone, feeling a mix of desperation and determination. You opened your chats and scrolled to Bakugo’s name. He was one of the smartest kids in class, and despite his rough exterior, you knew he could help.

*name*: bakugo can you help me with this homework?

explosion tits: no figure it out yourself dumbass

*name*: this is why you get no bitches

explosion tits: kys.

You scoffed in annoyance. What’s up his ass recently? you wondered, fidgeting with your phone. The dorms were unusually quiet, with most of the students away at various hero training sessions. Only you and three other kids were left behind, making the place feel almost deserted.

Scrolling through your contacts, you realized your options for homework help were limited. You could message Mineta, but the thought of dealing with his inappropriate responses made your skin crawl. He'd likely send you an unsolicited picture of his 1cm shriveled-up cock instead of any actual help with homework.

That left Denki. While he wasn’t the brightest, he was at least not as creepy as Mineta. You sighed and opened a chat with Denki, typing out a message.

*name* hey does this look right to you? [image]

free charger 🙏 : WOAH HELLO TO YOU TOO

*name* Tf you on about?

Free charger 🙏: [image]

your face turned bright pink as you opened the picture, that was Denkis dick. You always expected him to have a small dick but clearly not. you looked back down at your phone to type

*name* DENKI WHAT THE FUCK

free charger🙏: WHATT YOU SENT ME TITTIES I SENT YOU MY DICK I THOUGHT WE WERE TRADING NUDES

you stare at your screen in complete horror, what does he mean you sent titties? You checked the photo you sent and there it was, the nudes you had saved for dudes you were talking to…. But you had accidentally sent them to the 2nd dude you’d never want to send nudes to, first being mineta.

The sound of fast stomps echoed down the hall, and you assumed it was Bakugo chasing Izuku or Kirishima. Then, you remembered that both Izuku and Kirishima were out doing hero training. So who was stomping down the hallway if not bakugo?

The door bursted open, it was a very panicked kaminari “IM SORRY LETS FORGET ABOUY THIS” he said as he snatched your phone “HEY!” You yelped, trying to grab your phone back “IM DELETING THE PHOTOS HOLD ON!” He screamed, bakugos yelling could be heard in the distance “SHUT IT.” His gruff voice exclaimed. You watched kaminari try to delete the photos, a panicked look on his face; while you watched him do this you looked him up and down, noticing the obvious bulge in his pants

he didn’t have time to jerk off between you sending the photos and him bursting into your room? Your face turning pinker at the idea of his dick, he wasn’t exactly small and he had a very pretty dick… the familiar warmth went straight for your lower belly…

kaminari was muttering quick apologies, trying as quickly as he could to delete the photos “imsorryimsorryimsorryimsorry” “Denki!” “I’m trying to not be such a creep and i basically just ruined it all” “ Denki!��� “DONE! What?” He looked up at you “it’s fine, we all make mistakes” you tried to calm him down but to be honest it was more yourself from your own flustered moment “WHAT FRIENDS SEND EACH OTHER NUDES?” He acted bewildered, throwing his hands “uh�� friends with benefits?” You shrugged as you thought about it.

Denkis jaw dropped as he once again yelled “ARE WE FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS? IVE NEVER EVEN SEEN YOUR BOO- oh wait yes I have” he calmed down at the thought, his eyebrows furrowing before his face proceeding to get a lot pinker. The hardness between his legs became a lot worse. “NOT THE POINT!” He said as he gently threw your phone into your lap, but you seemed preoccupied; Your eyes going between his eyes and his dick.

Denki stood face to face with you, trying to figure out where your line of sight was. Denki soon realised why your face was so pink and it wasn’t because you had just seen his dick on camera or because you accidentally shown him your titties “are you.. are you looking at my dick?!” he seemed so surprised, not a bad surprised with how Pervy he was but just… surprised. “OH SHIT SORRY! H-HOW ABOUT YOU JUST L-LEAVE AND WE NEVER SPEAK OF THIS AGAIN YEAH?” You tried to push Denki out of your dorm, letting out a nervous laugh.

Denki saw an opportunity and he was going to take it? He suddenly resisted against your push and grabbed your hands to take them off his back “hey Uhm…” he starts “well you do have very pretty titties” he smirks and leans down to you, your whole face turning a much pinker shade “w-wha?” You stammered, trying to reach up and push Denki out “what? You do!” He chuckled and took a step forward “Denki what are you doing?” You crossed your arms against your chest, unknowingly giving him a better view of your tits. Denki grins and looks down at them “hey! Now you’re just showing them off.” He sneakily shut the door behind him.

“I-i wasn’t showing them off!” The feeling of arousal became worse and worse, you began to realise he was probably trying to see if you’ll let him see or even touch your boobs “what are you doing..?” You asked as you stepped back, Denki stepping forward “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEMME SEE ‘EM.” The blonde begged, clasping his hands together as he could feel his pants get even tighter. “I won’t hurt you I promise! I won’t even tell anyone!” He kept begging, even going as far as getting on his knees.

You thought about it for a moment, your face going pink. “I mean.. as long as this stays between us…” you mumbled, looking away to hide your obvious pink face. Denkis eyes lit up but then he tried to look more serious about it, not wanting to assault you obviously. You slowly sat down “AND NO HARD GRABBING! I’m not in the mood for sore boobs” you stuck your finger out at him, laying down some ground rules so you two were on the same page “deal! Wait I can grab them?” His face lit up again “i suppose yeah… BUT DONT HURT ME.” You reminded him of the rule “I’ll be gentle! I’ll be very gentle with you” he raised his hands to show that he was being honest. You got yourself in a more comfortable position on the bed as you pulled your shirt off, chucking it to the other side of the room. While you didn’t notice it, Denki was is absolute awe to see a girl in her bra at all.

“Mkay calm down” you giggled as tried to wake him from his trance, he shook his head to pull himself together. Denki slowly sat next to you on the plush mattress of your bed, he wanted to make himself comfortable for this. Why was he panicking so much?! You reached behind yourself and unclasped your bra, chucking it on the floor too before laying down on your back. Denki was again in complete awe, now he had a pretty girl laying down next to him with her tits out, this day could not get any better for Denki.

“Are you sure I can touch ‘em” he mumbled, obviously wanting confirmation he was actually allowed to touch you. “Yeah go on then” you smiled sweetly up at him, that made his brain overheat. Denkis hand reached out and slowly caressed over your left boob, paying extra attention to the sensitive bud on you. You let out a whimper and his face lit up, a new found confidence going him ability to keep going, his other hand reached out to caress your right tit. He soon found a way to hover over you as he squeezed and gently play with your tits. Denki chuckled in awe, he couldn’t believe he out of all people was making you feel this good. Atleast he assumed you felt good because of the whimpers you let out.

Denki looked up at you and slowly lowered his head to suck on your right nipple. You let out a whine and gripped his hair, grabbing a fistful. He giggles against your boob and waves his tongue over the sensitive bud “shit…”he whispered as he popped off your boob and leaned down to suck on the other one, fondling the one he just had in his mouth. You arched your back a little and let out a coo, running your fingers through his golden blonde locks. The blonde soon popped off your other boob, fondling both with his warm hands. He smirked smugly as he admired your body, he lowered his head again to kiss the valley between each breast before lowering his kisses down your belly as he listened to your sweet noises

“shit your actually really pretty, not like because I just sucked your tits it’s because your like actually pretty!” He sat up to admire you, you blushed and gripped the bedsheets “hmmph.” You pouted “damn someone’s got a attitude” Denki muttered as he went back to kissing your boobs and tummy, you slowly snaked your hand into his hair again and let out a series of whimpers with each kiss and suck. Denki grumbled when he realised that he didn’t have any condoms, looks like a blow job will do fine.

“Can I uh.. take your shorts off?” He asked, trying to atleast make you comfortable “it’s okay if you don’t wanna! It’s completely up to you princess” Denki grins up at you “yeah.. it’s fine” you sat up on your elbows to look down at him, his face was flushed and his eyes sparkled with arousal. Denki placed his fingers under your waistband and pulled your shorts down “shit were going commando today?” His eyebrows raised as his pupils grew, he used his big hands to pull your thighs apart “oh my god your so wet..” Denki mumbled, he had a genuine idea on how to eat a girl out from the pornos he watched but other than that he didn’t know how to pleasure you!

“you gotta let me eat you out” he looked up at you, Pupils blown and all. You let out a surprised whimper, then slowly nodded. “With your words princess with your words” he tapped your thigh with his finger, you gulped and looked down at your pussy “yeah.. sure you can eat me out..” you mumbled bashfully, Denki grinned and pulled your hips towards his face. Licking a stripe from your entrance to your clit, you let out a moan and gripped the bedsheets “nghh” your back arched off the mattress. Denki began to eat you out like a starved man, shoving his tongue inside and tongue fucking you before sucking on your clit, he pulled back with a pop and stuck his two fingers into his mouth to use as lube even though you were slick enough from your own juices and his spit for his two fingers to slide right in.

slowly Denki slid his fingers inside of you, stretching your walls out deliciously. You let out a desperate whine as he began to pump his thick fingers deeper and deeper, hr leaned back down to tongue at your clit. You sat up and gripped at his hair, he grunted against your clit. Causing a vibration against your core “t’much! I’m gonna.. I’m gonna..” you whined as the grip on his hair got tighter “holy shit am I about to make a girl cum?” He thought in his mind as he began to pump his fingers faster, making you release more and more moans. eventually you let out one last squeal before cumming hard on his fingers, you panted tiredly and looked down at his hand. Denki slowly pulled his fingers out, slick and cum glistening his fingers. Denki slowly stuck his fingers in his mouth and tasted you on his digits “shit.. pussy tastes good” he mumbled “huh?!” You gasped “calm down!” He chuckles and sat up, leaning his body over you “would you please suck me off? I’m actually really hard and it’s starting to hurt like a lot” he said with a sigh, enjoying the thought of you chocking on his dick.

you gulped and looked down between his legs, the bulge looked painful. “Yeah.. that looks like it hurts.” You nodded as you sat up straight, now completely naked infront of him. Denki grinned and sat down on the mattress, pulling his shorts and boxer briefs off his hips. Releasing his cock from the constraints of his pants , the poor thing was so hard that he even had precum dripping down the length of his dick:((

you sat down on the floor between his legs, your face blushing. Denki ran his hands through his hair, an attempt to calm his nerves. “You know I’ve never had a blow job before” he chuckles nervously as he watches you spit into your hand, you look up at him “I’ve never been eaten out before this so it’s fine” you told him, teaching over and beginning to stroke his lengthy cock. He let out a groan, your hand was so much better then his own fist. You leaned forward and licked the side; base to tip, giving the tip a couple swirls of the tongue. He groaned “shit are you sure you’ve never done this before?!” He said with a groan “mhm..” you hummed against the tip, causing a vibration that made him moan. Denki grabbed a fist full of your hair and pushed your head down on his cock. “Nghh fuck! That feels too good… I’ll probably cum quick…” he groaned as he used his hand to help you suck it, face fucking you.

you could feel the tip of his length going down your throat, tears welling up in your eyes. You gripped his thighs tightly so you had something to hold onto “shit I’m gonna fucking.. cum” he grunted as he began to face fuck you a little faster, he pushed your face all the way down his cock before letting out spurts of hot cum “soo fucking good…” he mumbled, letting your head go so you could breath. You pulled your face off his cock and slowly swallowed all of it, opening your mouth so he could see you swallows all of his seed “that’s hot…” he smirked and rubbed your cheek, and all of this came from doing homework

SHIT YOUR HOMEWORK.

[bugflies00]

i have so many thoughts about the tommy song/video and theyre a jumbled mess. i wouldnt call this an analysis this is just. most of my thoughts surrounding the video and what it shows about tommy

one of the things that stuck out to me (outside of how depressing and just like. is this guy okay) is something that ive always respected tommy for because he's always stuck with it and its his like. fervent conviction in people doing things theyre passionate about. thats always been one of the things he talks about all the time!!!

when AI started appearing he was talking about death of creativity, with the internet he's always talking about how the real tragedy is the algorithm killing people's passion by driving them with views and money, and even when he talks about youtube itself, and nowadays standup, its so full of passion.

and i think thats really important because it would be extremely easy for someone like tommy, who's in the process of maturing his online image from a very loud, immature and PASSIONATE persona, to make fun of it. it would be so easy to do like so many other creators and laugh at how "cringe" it was and make a quick cash/attention grab with a funny clip of him laughing at himself. but he never has. well don't get me wrong he's laughed at himself or old videos but it's always just. good natured taking the piss out of himself, it's never this like. mocking your younger self who was so excited to do what they did only because now its "cringe".

not only is he constantly giving that advice to other people (its been years of him replying, to any kid in his chat or donations asking advice on how to be a creator etc, "just go and do it if you love it!!"), he's coherent with how he applies it to himself. he realised he was making cash grab tiktok react vids and hated it so much he just stopped uploading for a while.

i dont know i just think there's something admirable about being able to still be sincere in a time where everything especially online has to be processed through a layer of irony. and its even funnier because he's more sincere THROUGH the irony i mean he's literally going into standup.

letting yourself create something that "means" something is fucking hard especially when half the internet still sees you as a kid who screams around. except the thing is that kid DID make stuff that mattered and that meant something because he was, in his own words, having fun.

i think thats what the format of the video was about too. i mean i think it was pretty clearly not a song thats meant to be streamed, its not purely music, its also a video because tommy is also first and foremost an editor who went to film college. its also not a "comedy" song like he's made some before, because those were all intentionally created to land as many jokes and make a big buzz— which doesnt mean they were bad! im philza is a contemporary lyrical masterpiece. but they had a specific purpose and it was to make people laugh and i think this video was completely like. opposite of what peoples expectations are of tommy. the "wow hes not a child anymore hes being mature🤓" reactions are the most obvious aspect of this (which, like, its been a while, get with the program).

i think the point of this was to make something that genuinely meant something but that was also like. as unpalatable to the algorithm and to the TommyInnit Viewer as possible. even now that he's gone into making quieter, more reflective videos, we've never had the flashing texts and the projector images and just all of that. hes always talking about how he hates the way the "youtube formula" has dictated the course of content and stolen all creativity for youtubers. its not meant to be a YouTube Video tm. its just meant to mean something to someone, and obviously process some sort of personal emotions, and i just think thats. yeah. yeah

i mean he even says so outright. "this needless, self indulgent spiral of self gratification" is pretty damn explicit. its not meant to be funny content its really a cry for help or for just. anything at all really

it was also a lot about perception, yknow the "entertainer" dilemma, "its all attention porn"... theres a layer of this point thats universal, everyone struggles with how they're perceived and i think any "artist" or "entertainer" figure can see themselves in it, but there's also a layer thats completely impermeable to most of us because it touches upon the sheer absurdity of a "youtuber". especially one of tommy's popularity. especially one who blew up so so fast so young. i honestly think its IMPOSSIBLE to process that. its about the ethics of having millions of people's time so readily available to you if you just press the right buttons to make the algorithm happy and then you've got them. im like 75% sure i remember him saying this on stream once, something like "your time is valuable" and if a fan didnt value him as an entertainer they should drop him.

and even here^ thats the saddest "lmao" ive seen in my life SORRY LOL but its really just. yeah im not gonna repeat myself it speaks for itself. perception and internet expectations and all that

one of the other images that stuck out to me was also this:

"yeah i know its too much like bo burnham but it wont be in a year though. in a year it will be like tom simons. just let me figure out what that means, ok?"

a lot of the video is about. influences and inspirations. the bo burnham references are so obvious he's poking at them, but i think he's raising a good point about the creativity that he's constantly praising. its never something that springs up on its own, its all about looking at others work and making it your own and feeding yourself with all those experiences and slowly, surely building your own way of doing things (tommyinnit "minecraft talent show" and "a tribute to dream smp" serial quackity + schlatt impersonator would know all about that) ->

and its daunting! its fucking scary to move away from that! which is also the main vibe i got from the video which, outside of his own issues with how he's perceived online, was the sort of existential dread that comes with actually creating. its one thing to preach you need to be passionate and create, its another to sit down and create something thats BY you. its a part of growing up! and we're literally seeing him do it live (well the bits that he chooses to show obviously)! thats also part of why i think tommy's so relatable to so many people is that he's so like. honest and real about what it's like to grow up, simple as that, and growing into yourself.

"this was everything to me" and using the picture of his younger self... man. theres obviously so much sadness underlying the whole thing but i think the nostalgia and melancholy in mourning being someone who was only inspired/excited by your interests and role models is universal. and obviously for tommy a lot of those influences turned out. well i think it was pretty damn clear who/what he was referring to here. ->

i don't think i need to go too in detail about that, especially cause a lot of the video was clearly a way to process his own personal emotions. especially with those next few images. i just hope he's okay and that god doubles his pain and gives it to mr beast to quote my friend bronzetomatoes. man.

of course he had to end with a funny clip about a hot anime girl and i think that kinda. sums it all up in a way. if that makes sense. at the end of the day its about the fact that he has to use humour to make the thing work when its out in the open, even when he tries not to and to be actually honest, but theres also the fact that hes literally a comedian and creating something "honest" IS through humor. its kindof a double edged sword

right well that was my jumbled mess of psychoanalysing tommyinnit i hope he is alright and all that because well that was. something

[f1amour]

✧˚ · . 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐘 𝐈𝐍 𝐁𝐀𝐊𝐔

pairing: oscar piastri x reader

word count: 2.7k

warnings: clingy oscar & reader, oral (m receiving), lil quickie, unprotected sex — 18+ only minors do not interact please.

authors note: was meant to write a small little blurb but quickly turned into a full fic for yesterday’s winner <3 not spelled checked so it might be a little messy.

───────────────────────── oscar had just gotten out of his car after winning the azerbaijan grand prix his second win of the sesson. his only thought was you. especially after not being there for his first win in hungary due to your work but now here you were ready to celebrate his second win

quickly getting off his car he goes straight to you embracing you in a sweaty, breathless hug “i’m so proud of you. you fucking killed it out there, osc.” oscar quickly removes his head gear not paying mind to the cameras and many eyes watching the two of you. his mind focused on your teary eyes, “what’s wrong, baby?”

he takes your face in his hands wiping away a tear “it's nothing, it's just… I wasn’t able to be here for your first win and we know how that all went down. seeing you win like this, it’s so overwhelming. i’m so happy for you.” oscar smiles with understanding flooding his face, and he pulls you into another tight hug, “you’re here now, that’s what matters. and i’m glad you’re here. i missed you.”

despite the presence of the cameras and the crowd around the both of you, oscar is completely focused on you, his heart filled with joyous excitement. without a care in the world, he captures your lips in a passionate kiss. he preferred pda in private or with family and friends not in front of dozens of camera and hundreds of strangers. but he was caught up in the moment of being there with you.

he mumbles against your lips, “i love you so much.” you wraps your arms around his neck, holding on tightly to him. your heart races in your chest, your emotions a jumble of pride, joy, and love all at once. you kiss him back, your lips molding against his in a passionate, affectionate display.

the cameras continue to click and flash around you, but in that moment, you don't care who's watching. all that matters is each other.

oscar deepens the kiss, his hands threading through your hair. the sound of applause and cheers from the crowd around you slowly registers in his ears, but he ignores it, too caught up in the moment with you. he finally breaks away from your lips, resting his forehead against yours and panting slightly. “i’ve been waiting all day to do that.”

you smile at him your hands tangled in his hair, “i could tell.” oscar grins, noticing the crowd of his team and his mom waiting to congratulate him. he gives you a smirk, knowing that you’re feeling a bit embarrassed after your private moment was inadvertently captured on camera. he squeezes your hand. "looks like i have some fans waiting for me." you blush, trying to compose yourself. "right, yes, go on. they're waiting for you. i’ll be here."

oscar nods and gives you one more quick kiss on the cheek before reluctantly letting go of your hand and walking over to his team and his mom. they all pat him on the back, congratulating him. oscar pretends to be annoyed at his teammates' teasing, but he's secretly loving the attention. "hey, i can't help it if i have a lovely girlfriend who just happens to be distracting."

oscar gives you a final smile before he's ushered away by his team. he glances back at you one more time before disappearing from view, his heart full and his mind already anticipating your reunion later.

as oscar looks down at the crowd, his eyes immediately find you standing front and center. despite the sea of strangers around you, you stick out to him. and next to you, he notices his mom, both of you watching him with pride etched on your faces. his heart swelling with joy, knowing that the two most important women in his life are there, supporting him, just makes the win that much sweeter.

you watch as oscar and the rest of them spray each other with champagne, laughing and enjoying the moment. but what you are really fixated on is the way his hair looks at that moment - tousled and slightly damp from the spray, clinging slightly to his forehead. it’s a sight that makes you heart skip a beat and a heat rise within you

you takes a deep breath, trying to keep your composure. but you can't help but imagine running your fingers through his hair, feeling the damp strands against your skin. the thought sends a shiver down your spine, and you have to remind yourself to maintain a casual, composed exterior.

you couldn't wait any longer. as soon as oscar walked into his drivers room and closed the door behind him, you pounced. you pull him towards you and capture his lips in a hungry, desperate kiss.

oscar was taken by surprise, but he quickly recovered and returned the kiss with just as much fervor. his hand came up to cup your face, his fingers tangling in your hair as he pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. your hands roamed his body, slipping under his shirt to feel the heat of his skin. you backed him up against the wall, pressing yourself against him as the kiss deepened.

oscar's mind was a haze of desire, his body responding to your touch. his hands found their way under your skirt, his fingers tracing a path along your bare skin.

oscar's breath hitches as your hand descends from his chest to his cock. the feeling of your touch ignites a fire within him, and he finds himself leaning into your touch subconsciously. his body and mind are at war, his desire for you fighting against his sense of responsibility and professionalism. he swallows hard, his voice hoarse as he speaks. "we...we shouldn't... i have the press conference in 15 minutes."

you get down on your knees and look up at him, your eyes darkened with desire and a hint of mischief. you smile, seeing the effect you are having on him. “just 15 minutes, oscar," you say, your voice sultry and seductive. "no one will notice if you're a few minutes late. and if you're quick, you can still make it in time." you slowly start to push his race suit down, your fingers working meticulously as you look up at him, awaiting his response.

“gotta be quick.” he mumbles. you grin, pleased with his response. you fingers finish tugging his race suit down. “i’ll be quick" you promise, your voice low and sultry.

oscar's breath hitches in his throat as you transition from your hands to your mouth, your touch suddenly more intense and intimate. he lifts his head from the wall, his eyes watching you with a mixture of pleasure and amazement. "oh...god..." he moans softly, his fingers involuntarily grasping your hair, tangling in the strands as he tries to maintain control. "that feels... incredible."

you continue, your movements skillful and purposeful. you respond to his sounds and movements, your touch and pace increasing or decreasing to match his responses. oscar's grip on your hair tightens, his breaths coming in short gasps and his body tensing with each movement of your mouth. "baby...i…i don't think...i can hold on for much longer..."

you can feel his body tensing beneath your touch, and you know he's close to the edge. with a final, skillful movement, you bring him to the brink, his body shuddering and his breaths coming in sharp gasps, “fuck y/n...oh god...i can't..." he manages to gasp out, his fingers clenching tightly in your hair.

just as oscar's body is about to reach its peak, there's a knock on the door, followed by a voice calling out, "oscar, we need you in the press room now." the sudden interruption jolts you both out of their moment, reality crashing back in, and oscar curses under his breath. the press conference. how could he forget?

“five more minutes. please baby?” oscar groans in frustration, his body still reeling from the near-release. but the knock on the door reminds him of his impending responsibilities. he looks down at you, his voice still husky with desire. “we don't have 5 minutes," he says, reluctantly pulling away from you. "i have to go. they're waiting for me."

still on your knees you look up at him with a pout on your face, “don’t you want to finish inside me?” giving him a teasing smile, you knew he couldn’t resist. oscar freezes at your words, “y/n... we can't... i have to go..." he says, his voice coming out strained and hoarse

you get off your knees and sit on his bed sighing dramatically, “fine i’ll take care of myself then.” oscar's eyes widen at her suggestion, a pang of jealousy and possessiveness running through him at the thought of you touching yourself instead of him. he clenches his fists, his jaw clenching as he tries to control his desires. he takes a step towards you, his voice gravelly. "please don't." oscar swallows, the sight of you on the bed, the thought of you taking care of yourself instead of him nearly drives him over the edge.

he steps closer to you, his voice low and intense. "don’t...i…i can't stand the thought of you... without me." you gives him a playful smile, a challenge in your eyes. you point to the door, still sitting on the bed, and say, "you know what you have to do. go tell them you need five minutes."

oscar hesitates for a moment, his mind racing as he looks at you, but the fire in his eyes tells you that he's given in. oscar strides to the door, his mind racing with excitement. he opens it slowly, peeking his head out, and sees his press officer standing in the hallway, looking impatient.

he addresses them with a calm smile, masking the intense emotions swirling inside him. "hey, i need five minutes. you mind giving me a bit more time?" his press officer looks at him, raising an eyebrow. "five minutes? we’re already running late, oscar." but oscar remains steadfast, his expression not betraying the desperation he feels inside. "yes, five minutes. it's important. i promise i'll be quick."

they glance at their watch, clearly impatient, “alright five minutes, but don't take too long." oscar nods, his heart racing with anticipation. "thanks. i won't be long."

oscar closes the door quickly, a mixture of relief and excitement coursing through him. he turns to you, his eyes darkened with desire. "five minutes is all i got. let's not waste any time." you lay playfully on the bed, your eyes twinkling with a mixture of innocence and seductive. you giggle and say, “what are you waiting for? fuck me already, oscar."

oscar reaches the bed, his eyes locked onto yours. he quickly takes off his shoes and crawls onto the bed, hovering over you. he leans down, his lips gently brushing against your neck as he huskily whispers, "i’ve been waiting all week for this."

oscar's lips continue their descent, moving down to your collarbone, planting soft, hungry kisses along the way. his hands eagerly roam your body, tracing the curves of your hips and thighs as he positions himself between your legs. “you have no idea how much i’ve missed this," he murmurs, his voice thick with desire.

you moan and nod, reminding him that he needs to be quick and fast. you spreads your legs wider, anticipating his next move. "yes, honey...please," you whisper, your voice filled with need. "be quick and fast."

oscar doesn't need any more encouragement. he can't resist any longer, and he quickly responds to your plea. without hesitation, oscar positions himself between your legs, his body aligned perfectly against yours. he looks into yours eyes, his own darkened with a mixture of desire and control. “i’ve got you." he whispers, his voice low and reassuring.

he doesn't waste any time, oscar captures your lips in a searing kiss, muffling your moans as he sinks deep inside you in one smooth, fluid motion. “god you’re so fucking tight, you feel so good sweetheart, so good.” oscar praises as you squeaked as his thumb found your clit working it in tight circles. the angle of this position made it so he hit your g-spot with each thrust.

oscar's movements are quick, determined, and focused, his body responding to your every gasp and sound. he keeps a steady pace, his hands gripping your hips as he slams into you deep and hard, each stroke filling you completely.

“fuck…fuck yes, right there. i’m gonna come, osc!”the sound of your voice, your pleading cries, and the tugging on his hair sent a jolt of pleasure through oscar's body. he’s hanging on by a thread, holding himself back but barely.

"i’m right there with you...baby," he grunts, his voice strained with the effort to maintain control.

your walls fluttered around oscar’s cock. “that’s it, baby. come all over my fucking cock,” the second those words left oscar’s mouth was when your orgasm washed over you.

oscar’s hips stuttered as he came soon after, his head falling into the crook of your neck as he bit down on your shoulder. oscar continues to hold you close, his body still trembling as he tries to catch his breath. he presses his forehead against yours, his eyes locking onto you.

"i don't know what i’d do without you," he whispers, his voice ragged and sincere. "you drive me absolutely crazy." you cuddle closer, your body still buzzing with pleasure and satisfaction. you smile up at him, your fingers gently tracing circles on his back. "and you drive me crazy," you reply, your voice soft and loving. "but in the best possible way."

oscar smiles, his eyes filled with affection and contentment. he gently brushes a strand of hair away from your face, his touch gentle. "i could lie here with you forever," he says softly, his voice filled with sincerity. "but unfortunately, we don't have time for that." oscar reluctantly pulls away from you, his body yearning to stay close. however , he has to get dressed and return to the press conference.

you can see it in his eyes. oscar wants nothing more than to stay with you in that room, away from the pressures and demands of the outside world. but you both know that's not an option right now.

you give him a sympathetic smile, understanding his struggle. "you should go. they’re probably already wondering what's taking you so long."

oscar nods, reluctantly accepting that he has to leave. he takes a final moment to look at you, his eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and desire. "i really don't want to go," he admits, his voice laced with regret. “but duty calls."

you smile, giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek. "see you later, my winner," you say softly. "you better save some energy for me later tonight."

oscar groans again, his thoughts still on you and your stolen moment together. before he can even respond, his press officer grabs him by the arm as soon as he opens the door and begins to pull him away.

"alright, come on, oscar. we’re already late," the press officer sighs, sounding slightly annoyed. "you can't just disappear like that when you are needed for the press conference."

oscar sighs, knowing the press officer is right. he allows himself to be dragged away, his mind still preoccupied with you but trying to focus on the press conference. “yeah, I know, i’m sorry," he apologizes, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "i got held up."

oscar sits between george and charles, both wearing knowing smiles on their faces. some of the reporters present, particularly the keen-eyed ones, notice the lipstick marks and the mark on his neck. they exchange glances among themselves, puzzled and amused by oscar's appearance.

oscar, oblivious to his disheveled state, smiles and wait to be asked a few questions. little does he know that he's providing quite the gossip material for his fellow drivers and the media.

oscar can feel the weight of the eyes upon him, and he chuckles nervously. he glances around, sensing the subtle giggles and whispers among the reporters. “is there something on my face?" he asks jokingly, trying to maintain a light-hearted tone. the irony of his question is not lost on him, considering the noticeable lipstick smudges on his cheeks and neck.

[onepieceisreeeeaaalll]

Don't Stop - Law x FemReader

Hey all! This is my first attempt at writing smut that I feel like is good enough to publish. Since it's kinktober, I wanted to contribute to the community in some way. I typed it up this morning and went over it a few times. Its fairly short, a little over 3k words and features mutual masturbation.

Edit: I keep going back and making changes when will the perfectionism leave me lol. I also changed the title bc I like it better.

This is for my Law girlie's. Hope you enjoy!

--------

Law had decided early on that day that he wouldn’t allow any distractions. He had let the paperwork build and build over the past couple of days, something that has greatly troubled him. It’s not like him to avoid work, but he couldn’t get that damn woman off his mind no matter how hard he tried. The feeling of her curves, the valley between her breasts, the sounds she’d make-

Today is different, though. Today will be productive and disciplined. He’s the damn Captain, a surgeon - he can handle a little discipline. But no matter how many times he reads through his paperwork, fills out variables and dots his signatures, he struggles with maintaining focus. He’s never felt so needy before, so goddamn horny. It’s annoying the way you completely flood his senses in every way. More than that, it’s irritating. After what feels like hours, but has likely only been maybe one hour of mindlessly dragging his eyes along the papers, he groans in frustration. Law leans back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose.

He can’t. The moment he closes his eyes, all he can see is your beautiful smile. The way the light shines through your hair, the sway of your hips and the shape of your ass. How your lips looked wrapped around him last night. His thoughts get more jumbled, more needlessly arousing that he feels his cock twitch in his jeans. Fuck. Goddammit. This is bullshit.

Get a grip, Trafalgar. Get a goddamn grip on yourself.

He can’t take it anymore. In one swift motion, he stands abruptly from his desk and exits his office. Law can be a patient man when he needs to be, but today is not one of those days. He can’t focus until he sees you, until he gets the opportunity to bring you both to a fucked-out state of bliss. He needs to feel his body against yours, to light the fire in his veins that pervades and itches beneath his skin. Law barely even registers the faces he passes, the familiar friends and colleagues of his crew with their faces twisted with either concern or a knowing expression. They aren’t even on his mind. His feet move fast, echoing through the metal halls of the Polar Tang. He needs you. He needs you like air.

Law makes it to his quarters where he had left you this morning. He’d exchanged a few sweet chaste kisses in the early morning hours to try to convince the both of you that he’d come back for more later. Later arrived far sooner than either of you might have anticipated, but his control had snapped and he's now a man on a mission. He takes a deep breath, his hand lingering on the doorknob. This is it, Trafalgar, your one last chance to walk away before you-

“Fuck.”

A breathy moan reverberates from inside of the room. Law feels his heart stop and his blood turn cold. He knows that voice, the quality of swears that leave you when you’re in the throws of passion. Are you…?

Another moan, this time longer but softer. His eyes widen and his heart suddenly quickens at the sound. He can’t believe it. You are.

An internal, agonizing debate begins in his head. Should he walk in, give you what you need? Should he walk away, try to take care of business himself? At this point he’s too far gone - he knows what you’re doing and god does he want to join. With the sound of another wanton moan, his primal urges win out and he gently pushes open the door. He's careful to move it in just the right way that it won’t creak, unsure if he wants to get caught and possibly interrupt it. He slips in, quickly closing the door behind him to observe the debauchery going on in his bed.

And fuck, is it debaucherous.

Law takes in the beautiful feast before him - you lying back on the mattress, only a thin sheet haphazardly resting against your lower waist, blocking the full view of your activities. Your back is arched, eyes closed as your hands move desperately in tandem beneath the sheets. He can hear the wet sounds of your slick being invaded by your digits and, judging by the trembling of your legs, you’ve been at this for a while. A small, shaky breath leaves him as he hears your noises - god, those noises that haunt him and invade his dreams. Those enchanting, goddamn helpless sighs, little gasps and hiccups that escape you when you’re really enjoying yourself. Law swears he could listen to them on repeat and never tire of hearing them. The flush of your cheeks is so mesmerizing that his eyes linger there in particular for a moment, a growing desire rising in him to make that blush deeper. His eyes trail back down, and this is the part that really makes him really feral; you’re wearing his shirt, and it’s hoisted just above your breasts to expose the beautiful peaks of your areolas. Everything about you is so intoxicating, and the fact that you’re completely surrounded by him, his scent, his private quarters - all of it just sets him off. He is immediately hard in his jeans, feeling the tightness constricting him like a vice.

“Fuck…” Law breathes, accidentally falling back against the door.

That’s when you hear him. With two fingers still curled inside you, your finger desperately rubbing your needy clit, you halt your movements dead in your tracks. Your eyes widen at the sight of your boyfriend leaning against the door, his own face slightly flushed despite his usual resting-grumpy face. Your heart is racing and you can’t even think for a moment from the combination of the lustful haze and embarrassment filling you. You’re both quietly observing each other, watching with acute awareness that this isn’t what either of you were expecting. Finally, you can’t stand the awkward silence anymore, and you decide to speak.

“I thought you were working.” You say breathlessly, your voice still shaky from the intensity of your actions only moments ago.

“Yeah, I can see that.” You respond quietly. You’re trying to get a handle on your breathing, but your hands are still posed to attack at your aching center again. You don’t know why you haven’t moved them away yet, but now it feels awkward to call attention to that area.

“I was.” Law answers simply, a little more quickly than even he meant. “I’m not now, though.”

It doesn’t matter if you do call attention to it or not, though. Law’s eyes are already trailing down your body with a silent reverence and a hidden, predatory intention. His throat bobs as he makes it to the sheet that’s covering you. It’s silent again but only for a few moments this time. It doesn’t take long before Law’s self control breaks.

“Don’t stop.”

Your breathing hitches at his words, the way they sound so firm yet strained making your walls clench around your fingers automatically. Don’t stop - don’t stop? Your brain doesn’t even fully comprehend the command before your hands are already working you over again. The middle and ring fingers of your right hand rub slow circles at your clit, the same fingers on your left hand beginning to pump back into you. It’s not as intense as it was when you were interrupted but it’s enough to elicit small, needy whines from you. Your eyes stay trained on Law’s and the way his pupils seem to have darkened over his expression. You trail over his body in a quiet admiration for your boyfriend. His muscles that are taut beneath his shirt, the way his belt buckle rests on his waist, and his cock that's so hard and dying to escape his pants. The sight makes you groan and you have to bite your lip to keep yourself from getting too loud.

A small smirk rises to Law’s lips. He sees exactly what you’re looking at and it drives him crazy with need. His arms are crossed over his chest as he watches the show, but he’s not sure how long he can last with the throbbing in his groin.

“Move the sheet.” He instructs, his voice smooth but commanding. It’s the same voice he uses when he’s giving out assignments or instructing a surgery. It’s also your favorite voice he uses in the bedroom.

You take your hand away from your clit, shakily moving it to remove the sheet that blocks his view. Once you’re fully exposed, your hand returns to your clit and a soft whimper escapes your throat. You’re pulsing around your fingers again when you see the way his eyes zero-in on your pussy and the good work you’re doing. Fuck, it’s such a turn-on to see the way his cock twitches in his jeans. Through breathless gasps, your hands increase their speed and your own gaze is fixated on Law.

“Touch yourself.” You instruct, using your own commanding voice despite how much you’re falling apart.

You don’t need to tell Law twice. His hands move to undo his belt with practiced ease, but his eyes never leave you. His smirk stays fixated on his lips even with how flustered he’s feeling. You’re so beautiful to him, you hung the goddamn moon and now you’re putting on the most perfect show for him. He can't get enough.

“You want me to get off to you touching yourself, (y/n)?” Law asks in almost a mocking, teasing tone.

You nod weakly, biting your lip when you see him toss the belt aside carelessly. His hands move to his buttons and zipper, and the sound of the zipper echoing in the room is enough to make a few needy sighs leave you. It’s only heightened when his cock springs out eagerly as though it was dying to greet you and make an appearance.

“Fuck, you’re so hard…” You groan, your eyes shutting briefly to try to get a grip on yourself.

That’s not good enough for Law, though.

“Hey, eyes up here. You’re the one who wanted me to touch myself.” Law says, his tone both firm and somehow still laced in mockery.

Your eyes snap open at his command and you can see he’s already making quick work of his shaft, his hand pumping in slow, measured movements. His tip is already red and inflamed, glistening beautifully with his precum in a way that makes you lick your lips. Without your permission, your hands have already started picking up the speed. Your two fingers are curling and moving in and out of you with a force that makes your body tense. Your fingers at your clit circle the bundle of nerves furiously, causing your body to shiver from the pleasurable sensations. You’re already so close from building yourself back up. This scenario, it’s the hottest thing that you and Law have ever done, which is saying something.

It’s so primal, so horny and hungry that both of you have to watch each other masturbate while longing to touch the other. The sounds in the room are absolutely sinful - moans, low curses, huffs, and the sound of skin being assaulted echo against the metal walls. Pure unadulterated lust fills the room and it's enough to make both you and Law feels completely enraptured by it. You’ve never seen Law so undone so quickly before and you’ve certainly never seen the way he touches himself. It’s almost hypnotizing to dart between the focused look on his face and the way his hand eagerly strokes his cock.

“Add a third finger.” Law commands, his voice breathless and strained.

You immediately do as he says, a third finger poking into your core with little regard. Another whine leaves you and the way your face contorts with pleasure causes Law’s hips to buck towards his hand involuntarily.

“Fuck, (y/n)...you’re so goddamn needy for me. You couldn’t wait a few hours?” He mocks breathlessly.

“No, I-...I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Clearly. You’re so wet for me, I-” Law hisses, his hand clenching around his cock. “God, you’re so beautiful like this. Using your hands and pretending they’re mine.”

You groan, your body arching slightly at his praise. He always knows exactly what to say to get you there but you always give it right back to him. Dirty talk has almost become a game between the two of you. Ordinarily the surgeon is very introverted and stern, but in the bedroom he has a way of opening up far more than you’d ever expected.

“Yeah? You like that I couldn’t stop thinking about you, that I- ah-...that I needed to fuck myself?” You respond just as breathlessly before biting your lip to suppress another whiny moan.

Law doesn’t respond immediately, a strangled huff leaving his throat instead. He’s not one for making a lot of noises, but you have a way of bringing out the worst - and best - in him.

“What were you thinking about?” Law asks quickly, almost like he’s compelled to.

Your hands increase their speed, your fingers almost slamming into you and dragging along your walls. Every now and then you touch that beautiful, spongy g-spot that makes your pussy clench tighter.

“You bending me over your desk, slapping my ass and calling me a good girl.” The words fall out of your mouth, and you’d almost be embarrassed if you weren’t so worked up.

That doesn’t matter to Law, though. He groans, his head falling back against the door he’s still leaning against. He can feel his heartrate quickening and every word you say is pushing him closer. Your voice alone is like a goddamn aphrodisiac.

You’re not doing much better, either. Seeing him almost lose himself from your admission sends a shiver down your spine. You can’t take your eyes off of his cock - you’re completely fixated by the way his veins decorate his shaft and the tattoos on his hands moving fervently to bring him to a release. You can feel yourself reaching that peak, teetering on the edge towards absolute nirvana.

The noises coming out of you are not even controlled anymore - they’re animalistic, urgent, and your hands are moving with that same energy. It’s been quiet for a minute now since your admission, but Law speaks up quicker this time than the last.

“Look at you, taking your fingers so good. You're such a mess.” He breathes, his hand stroking his cock a little faster now. He can see the sickness of your fingers when they exit you and it's so delicious looking. “A goddamn mess. So fucking tight you can barely move your fingers.”

“Law.” You whine, your body tensing. He's absolutely right - with how much you're tightening and pulsing on your fingers, you can barely move all three of your fingers. Your walls have a firm grip on you as if trying to swallow you whole.

“Yeah, baby? You say my name so goddamn perfect. Say it again. Say it.” He commands, small huffs of air leaving him. If you could hear anything over the noise of your pussy and the sounds leaving you, Law can be heard groaning so softly.

“Law. Fuck, you feel so good.” You gasp, your mind completely hazy. It's not even him in you but you're so preoccupied by the movements of his hand that you can't help it. It's what comes out.

“Mm…do I? You wish it was my cock stuffing your pretty pussy instead?” Law groans, his head falling back again. He's so close that he can't even begin to hold himself together anymore.

“Yes. Please, I want…fuck, I-...oh my g-...” You choke out, your words barely even coherent anymore. You're so close, right on that precipice, and it makes Law let out a breathless chuckle.

“You gonna come already? Fine, do it, then. Be a good girl and look at me while you cream on your fingers.” Law commands breathlessly, his voice strained but stern.

That's all it takes for you. With a final curl of your digits, you're sent firmly over the edge and into complete unfettered ecstasy. The way you tremble and keen makes Law finish too, though his is more controlled and fairly silent save for one quiet groan.

Law can't peel his eyes away from you as you finish. It's mesmerizing watching you writhe and work yourself through your orgasm. It feels like he's watching some taboo art he's not supposed to. Your body is so gorgeous to him that it makes his heart pound. How in hell did he get so lucky?

After a few moments of panting and quietly recollecting yourselves, Law pads off across the room to grab a towel and clean his hand. He'd managed to catch most of his release, though he has to wipe some of it from his shirt. With a sigh, he removes the material, chiding himself silently for making such a mess. He finally glances back over at you, seeing the blissed-out limp expression on your face. Law smirks before making his way over to the bed, taking a seat next to you.

It's quiet for a moment and he can tell that you've fully come back to yourself. Your flushed cheeks indicate the embarrassment that seems to have finally settled in. He chuckles softly, taking a hand to brush some hair from your forehead.

“You have a good time?” He teases quietly.

You groan, annoyed, and avert your gaze from his. You've never been caught masturbating before, much less masturbated with someone else. It was as vulnerable and shameful as it was hot.

“Shut up.” You pout. “I didn't think you were coming back for a few hours.”

“I know.” Law says gently, moving his fingers delicately through your hair. “It's fine. Nothing to be embarrassed about.”

“Yeah, well I disagree.”

“What? You didn't like it?” Law asks with a small smirk. Judging by how you two got off, he knows that you'd be full of shit to deny it.

“Tell you what. I still have some work that I need to get done. At lunch, though, I want you to stop by my office.” Law leans in close, his breath tickling your ear. “Maybe we can make that fantasy of yours a reality.”

You don't even bother answering. You know he knows the answer. After a few moments of silence, Law clicks his tongue his fingers moving to drag his knuckles across your cheek gently.

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Lost and found

a/n a lot of you wanted a part two to the blurb I posted a bit ago. So here it is, Rhys!sister x Rhys and Azriel x reader. The first part is here. Enjoy

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Azriel watches you sleep. It took them hours to calm you down. Hours of you having snippets of your past ripping through your tortured brain. Hours of sobs turning to screams towards the end. Azriel held you through it all. Heart breaking at the sight of you in pain. His own emotions so jumbled and twisted. Yes, a part of him felt joy that you had found a piece of your shared past. That it brought you back. Back to him. Back from the grave he had buried you in. But with the healers worrying about you frying yourself from within. Too many stimulations. Too many emotions. It hung over Azriel like a blade. Threatening to take you away for good.

His fingers moved over your forehead. Soothing you in your sleep. Trying to keep the lurking dreams away. To give you blankness. Emptiness. A true chance at rest. Only after hours of listening to your steady breathing does he push up. The thought of leaving you frightened him but he wanted to have food and water by hand. In case you woke up. Your favorite bits to eat. Something to give your body strength.

“You should have told me”, a voice cuts through the dim corridor. Azriel only takes a steadying breath in, “It wouldn’t have mattered at the time”. He knew Rhys was gonna torment him about this. He didn’t expect it to happen so soon. “You matting my sister seems like a pretty big fucking deal to me”, his dark frame cuts Azriel’s path. The always neatly ironed shirt looked crumpled. Something Rhys usually never allowed to happen. “It happened fast”, Azriel let out a sigh, “I was escorting her to your mother. And it just… snapped into place. I touched her palm Rhys, my finger brushing the inside of her palm and that was all it took”, the spymaster tugged at the roots of his hair in frustration. Rhys simply shakes his head, “You… that night you were a manic. You killed like there was no tomorrow”, “I thought she was dead, Rhys, there was no tomorrow for me”, Azriel cuts in, a frustrated growl slips past his lips of being forced to remember the pain. “You should have told me, you mourned her all alone. I dump my pain on you and…”, Rhys grunts, “How did mother found out?”

Azriel brushes a hand over his face, “She saw us by the carriage. I think we both stopped breathing for a while just stared at one another. She just offered to take us to the priestess”. Rhys watched Azriel for a moment. Little snippets from the past finally fall together. Finally making sense. “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed that you didn’t feel that you could trust me with this”, the words sting. But they would have no matter the way that truth would have come out.

A part of Azriel wants to make peace between them. Settle the argument between them both for good. But it’s the shriek that has them both turning towards the door just down the hall. Both break into a sprint straight away. The sight is enough to break both of their hearts all over again. Your shaking frame is on the floor. The sheets pooling around you. Azriel kneels in front of you first. Hands reaching out to you. “It hurts”, you mutter, eyes closing as tears stream down your face. “I know my love”, he sighs, kissing your knuckles. “I want to remember but I… I can’t do this anymore”, your hands find your scalp as you claw at your skin. Azriel is quick to stop your movements. Your eyes look up, landing on your brother. “Rhys”, you mutter and it sends a shiver down his body. “I’m so sorry”, another sob slips past your lips but you’re met with the high lord sinking to his knees. Arms outstretched as he calls you in. Azriel’s hand guides your back as you practically crawl onto Rhys’s lap. His arms wrap around you instantly. “You have nothing to apologize for, all I care about is that you are here, with me, with us, that’s enough”, his fingers slowly brush through your hair. “Let me”, Rhys breathes, and it’s more of a beg but you find yourself nodding slowly. You feel his magic slowly seeping into your skin, numbing you from within. His sad eyes burn into you. You only blink at him, feeling your body sag slowly as his power clamps around your mind. You refused it the first time around. Frightened by the thought of anyone getting that close to you ever again. Of taking control like that. A silent tear slips down your cheek as you watch him watch you. You feel the familiar sensation of Azriel’s scared palms grazing your hand, as he intertwines both of your fingers together. “Squeeze Az’s hand when you want me to stop”, Rhys's hands move down your back as he tries to soothe you. You blink twice before trying to turn your head slightly, failing miserably. “Az”, your voice doesn’t sound like your own but you feel the reassuring squeeze, “I’m right beside you, you’re not alone”, and that’s enough to make you close your eyes once more. The feeling of two men a brother and a lover, sat on the floor just to soothe you. Just to make it better. Relief flows through your veins as you give up your consciousness to the brother you didn’t know you had. To the brother that came back in fragments. To the lost and found.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

@locotreofthegods @shadowsingers-redhood @everyonehatescarmen @theravenphoenix26 @shadowsingercassia you guys left a comment so I thought I would tag you. ✨

[mustainegf]

James is at bar with Kirk, Lars and Cliff and reader is giving him head under table, 80s

I SCREEEAAAMMMED THIS IS SO MMMMM

𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 ¹⁹⁸⁴

I cannot believe I let my girlfriend talk me into this. Here we are sitting in this dim bar with Kirk, Lars, and Cliff, and she is now under the table with her head burrowed between my legs.

The tablecloth is long enough to keep our little secret concealed from prying eyes, but it's starting to get tough to keep a straight face.

The guys haven't stopped quizzing me about where she's gone since we walked in the door. I've been making up some story or other, trying to palm it off on them.

My heart's in my mouth every time one of them gives me a sideways glance. I can only think what must be going through their minds, that maybe I've had one too many drinks or that I lost her in the crowd.

I glanced down at her, and she locked eyes with me briefly, then went back to doing what she was doing. Her mouth was warm and wet, each touch made cold shivers run up my spine.

She was so into it that I almost thought she had forgotten we were in public. I tried not to move or make a noise, but it was impossible to avoid the thoughts running through my head.

I could picture the face she was making while working her magic below the table. Her eyes locked with mine, the evil sparkle dancing deep within, and I could feel her tongue tracing the lines on my shaft, lips squeezed around me like she would never let go.

My mind strayed back to the number of nights that we had spent inside each other's bodies and how this moment was just another addition to our sexual escapades.

The conversation at the table has reached a peak, as Kirk goes on about how one of his strings broke. Lars laughs, Cliff rolls his eyes, pretending to be bored.

I try to tune them out, my focus solely on her tongue flicking on my throbbing tip. She quickens her pace, and I feel it.

Suddenly, a stray thought gets me off guard…what if someone lifted the tablecloth? That very idea sent a spike of adrenaline through my veins. I flick my eyes to my girlfriend, who I hope felt my unease.

She looked back at me once more, her eyes shining with that glint which said she knew full well the danger we were courting.

"Hey, James, where’d your girl go?" Kirk asks again, this time suspiciously.

I tried to act as nonchalant as possible and forced a grin. "Oh, uh, she just needed to go to the bathroom, I think."

Next, Lars snorts, "You should have seen her before, she was all over you."

Cliff then rose an eyebrow. "Yeah, and now she vanished into thin air?"

The men all exchanged knowing looks. Only hoping that they would drop the matter soon.

With minutes ticking by, the ministrations from my girlfriend tick on the pressure inside. My thoughts suddenly jumble up, and I barely retain a clear thought.

The dam finally breaks, and I'm consumed by the orgasm that's been building for at least 30 minutes now. It feels like forever. Her lips tighten around me as she draws out every last drop of my seed, letting it drip down her throat. It becomes nearly impossible to maintain a grip on reality.

My sudden awareness is of the guys staring at me with amusement. They can clearly see the look on my face as I cum. It's time to confess, there is just no continuing this charade.

"I, um… got something to tell you guys," I stammer, burning with my face in embarrassment. "She’s not in the bathroom..."

[consistencynevermether]

Ice cold: Astarion x reader

content: ascended Astarion x gn tav, angst, tav is goin through it in this one yall, i give karlach a more hopeful ending in the background bc i just want her to be happy, karlach and tav besties agenda, sfw, cannon typical violence

summary: after breaking it off with ascended Astarion, you meet again at a winter ball

word count: 6k (apparently i cant shut up about this man)

a/n: man i gotta write more happy Astarion content fr i keep putting this man in situations.

How many years had it been since you’d seen Astarion? 3? 5? Maybe more? You try to remember what your last moments with him were like before you decided to break things off. It was definitely after he ascended, but was it before you had gotten rid of the tadpole, or after? Honestly, after a while things had started to blur together really. After so many years, only the painful parts remained clear in your memory. How you, with tears in your eyes, had told him you couldn’t do this anymore. And the look of condescending and uncaring as he stared back. It had shattered you into a million pieces to end things with Astarion, but it would have hurt even more if you had stayed. Whoever he had become after he ascended, it wasn’t your astarion, not really.

Why were you reminiscing about your lost love? Well because after all these years apart, he was now standing about 5 feet away from you. Gods above how did you get yourself in this situation?

Let’s start a few years back after Astarion had left to be the new lord of Baldur’s Gate and you had stayed, shattered. Having to pick up the broken pieces of what you once were, having to figure out who you would be without him. You probably should have taken some time alone, now that you think about it. Processed your emotions, talked to a professional, properly mourned what you had lost before continuing on.

Of course, you had done the opposite and instead had decided to travel with Karlach and Wyll to Avernus. Going to hell is probably not the best way to cope with a breakup, but that was the only option anyone could think of to try and save Karlach from the fate of the engine in her chest. And after what had happened to Astarion you just-

You just couldn’t 

You couldn’t lose someone else, if you did, you felt like you would have been shattered past the point of repair. You couldn’t take losing one of your only friends right after losing your love. So you gathered up the broken pieces of yourself and headed straight into the hells. 

You were down there for a few years probably. 

Maybe? 

Honestly, you didn’t remember. Time became sluggish and foggy after Astarion had left because it kept marching forward, away from your time together with him.

Yet in the end, Karlach had gotten her engine fixed and all 3 of you had climbed out of hell. A few more burn marks and scars, but nothing more than that had changed. Physically at least.

You had somehow managed to put your broken pieces back together, but you weren’t the same as before. You didn’t feel complete, more like a jumble of razor-sharp shards being forcefully welded together trying to imitate what you once were. But now you were jagged, and cracked, and tired

Gods, you were tired. The dark circles under your eyes never left, no matter how much you slept. Or tried to sleep that is.

Sometimes in the dead of night, you would replay Astarion's ascendance in your mind over and over again, wondering what you could have done differently then. Or even before. Where had you gone wrong? Was there another outcome that you failed to make happen? Was there another reality where the two of you were happy together? Gods how that thought hurt. 

 Sometimes, you thought about the what-ifs. You imagined what would have happened if he hadn’t chosen to ascend. What both of you could have been. What you so desperately wanted but could never reach. Eventually, you stopped that line of thought at night. It was too crushing to imagine how things could have been different. What you could have done differently. 

After emerging from hell, you had on and off traveled with some of your previous party. 

You and Wyll had headed to Waterdeep once to help Gale with a sea monster problem 

In an amusing team-up, you had helped Halsin and Lazel find an enchanted bracelet they were both searching for, though they both argued on how to act upon most things during that entire adventure, so you had felt almost like it was a babysitting gig the entire trip. 

There was also that time you helped Minsc dispose of some bandits robbing people near Baldur's gate, but you had dealt with that sorry lot fairly quickly and got far away from Baldur's Gate even quicker. You didn’t want to accidentally run into a certain lord. 

And now you had an entirely new quest, in the bitter cold land of Sossal. A few weeks ago, you met back up with Karlach who apparently had been looking for you.

It’s not that you disliked seeing Karlach at all, in fact, you were both very close, which was part of the problem really. Part of why it stung a little to see her. 

She saw you. She saw how much you hurt even after all this time. Your other friends seemed to have assumed that you had gotten better. That over time you had healed and it had gotten easier for you to come to terms with leaving Astarion. But Karlach knew the truth, She saw right through you, and it was mortifying. That every day the hole inside your heart had just got wider. She feared it would swallow you up one day, and you didn’t blame her. It didn’t help that being around her just made you feel so

Pathetic. 

She had been to literal Hell and back and could still smile and laugh, while you had only lost one person and had cracked and splintered like glass. It hurt to see the light that shined off her while you could only fall deeper into darkness. 

Of course, you knew none of that was her fault, you only had yourself to blame for who you were, so when she came asking for help, you didn’t hesitate to say yes. 

She was having engine troubles again. It wasn’t as bad as before, thank the gods, but it did have a tendency to overheat ever so slightly whenever she felt a strong emotion, and if you didn’t do something one wrong spook could set her ablaze. Luckily she had gone to Gale first and discovered a gem Called the frostbite tear. He could attune the gem to Karlach and make it so that every time her engine began to overheat, the jewel would immediately cool it down, negating the problem before it became a real issue like when you had first met her. Last anyone had heard of the gem it was with some noble in Sossal. 

So here you were. You, Karlach, Shadowheart, and Gale all together at the midwinters ball held here in the capital. Gale had procured the invites for you all, and every noble in Sossal, plus some from other territories, would be here for this celebration. Gale had even been nice enough to give you a beautiful outfit for the ball, made of silvery-white sparking silk. It reminded you of fresh snowfall on a winter's night. Admittedly it wasn’t very practical, and Gale did make you shower before putting it on. (Rude. You didn’t think you smelled t h a t bad.)

You were so focused on helping find this noble (and robbing him of the frostbite tear) that you hadn’t even considered Astarion might be here. 

Not up until the moment that his vibrant red eyes locked onto yours across the room. 

You couldn’t move. Everything was moving too fast and also in slow motion. Your legs felt like lead and your mouth was bone dry. The numbness that had settled in your chest for years now cracked open with new pain, and you weren’t sure which of the sensations you hated more. 

All all this panic and emotions, and yet in your mind all you could think of was how he looked just the same as the day you left. He hadn’t changed. And that made it all the harder. Because now it was easier to forget all the years between you two. He still looked the same as what you saw when you closed your eyes each night. It was Astarion. But on closer examination, not your Astarion. 

There was a coldness to him now. A certain reservation in his smile that made you feel like you would be a mere annoyance to him if you dared to approach. He seemed sharper somehow as well, like a finely honed blade. And his attire was extravagantly beautiful, the white fur-lined cloak he was wearing was probably more expensive than anything you had ever owned, including your current attire. 

You were so busy taking this all in mentally that when you went to glance at him again he was gone. For a split second, you genuinely wondered if you had finally snapped and just hallucinated all of that when an all too familiar hand took yours. 

You hadn't looked away for more than a second and astarion was right there in front of you, kissing your knuckles. The brush of his lips on your skin was nearly enough to bring you to your knees. All these years, and he still had so much power over you with one little motion.

To any outsider, this looked like quite the cute interaction really. The handsome new lord of Baldur's gate spots an incomparable beauty from across the room and is instantly smitten, so he effortlessly woes them the second he steps into the ballroom. But life is no romantic play. 

“Hello darling, it certainly has been a while. We simply must catch up” 

Before you could even attempt to respond, his hands were around your waist, guiding you to the dancefloor as the orchestra began to play, and other couples began to join the dancefloor as well. 

You’d hoped maybe the dance would save you from the conversation, but it seemed the opposite was what occurred, as Astarion leaned closer to your ear to whisper, “So, 7 years without a trace, and suddenly you show up looking positively exquisite. Do tell me what you’ve been up to.” 

Your mouth opens to respond, but you realize you have no idea what to say. What could you possibly say to him, and why would you even say it? 

Luckily you were spared any more torture when you noticed Astarion staring intently at your neck. The sight reminded you of that night you found out he was a vampire spawn, and you had let him drink from you for the first time. But instead of hunger Astarions brown was furrowed with another emotion. Annoyance? Concern? Worry? You couldn’t tell anymore. It had been years since you could tell what Astarion was thinking

His voice broke the silence once again. 

“Is this new?” His long pale fingers brushed across the burn scar near your collarbone.

Ah. So that’s what he was staring at. 

“Well it’s been there a few years, so I wouldn’t really consider it new but-“ you shrug at the end of your sentence, and you both know what you meant. It was only new to him. He may have stayed unchanged all these years, but you certainly hadn’t. And it seemed Astarion was beginning to notice. 

His eyes raked over you, taking in the changes. You were a bit more muscular now, all that constant fighting no doubt. Your new(er) scars were more visible in this outfit, which admittedly was a little revealing and definitely not meant to withstand the harsh outside winter. And the years now showed in the tired look in your eyes. You imagine that your eyes aged you quite a bit honestly, maybe you should be shocked he even recognized you now. 

“So”, he started, decidedly keeping his hand firmly around your waist so you couldn’t run from the conversation, “when you made my undead heart beat again only to toss it on the ground at my feet again like it was nothing all those years ago, I always imagined how nice it would feel to see you struggle while I thrived as lord of Baldur's Gate.” 

Wow. Impressively bad flirting. Had he gotten worse at this over the years? Or maybe he just detested you so much he didn’t even think there was a point in even pretending to like you anymore. 

“But now that I’m actually here and you look-“

He gestured at you vaguely 

“Well a bit like you’d been the one who got dumped, it doesn’t feel very satisfying.” 

“Mhm,” you responded, in a stroke of pure poetry. 

“Darling, you have to give me more than that. The silent treatment after all this time is just petty, even for me.”

He had a point. And part of you did want to know-

“How have you been, Astarion?” 

His steps faltered a little when you said his name, but he quickly recovered, smoothly continuing the dance 

He smirked, his fangs visible on one side “Well certainly better than you if I had to wager, the stuff under my eyes is eyeliner, not sleep deprivation side effects.”

You close the distance between you two involuntarily to get a closer look at his face. He was wearing some sort of golden liquid as eyeliner on his bottom lids. It was subtle but beautiful, and it shined when the light hit his face just right. On instinct, you began to reach towards his face, but you quickly stopped yourself. You needed to stay focused, damnit. You were here to help Karlach.

Astarion's smooth voice cut in once again. “Still making me do all the talking? Honestly, I don’t ever remember you being this quiet before.” 

You startled and realized you had been staring at his face for a while, and then trying to snap yourself out of it, all while not making a sound

Gods you don’t remember it being this hard to talk to him. But then again, you found it harder to talk to anyone these days. you just-

You just didn’t expect that to also apply to Astarion. Further proof that despite him looking the same, there was distance now. A silent gaping chasm that you had no way to cross. But that is what you wanted, wasn't it? To get away from this Astarion. The one who considered you a pet, or an object to be displayed. Treasured, and loved, but never his equal. Never fully having free will, everything you would have done would have had to be something he approved of. 

You loved him, more than anything. You still did. Deep down you knew you would die for this twisted version of your love, and if he asked you to rip out your own heart and serve it to him, you would. But you couldn’t be with him. Everything else you would do for him, but that was where you drew the line. It hurt too much, to be reminded every day of what you had lost. Of what you have failed to protect. That sweet high elf with a silver tongue and a heart of gold he let so few see. The one who wished for freedom more than anything, but still stuck by your side. Because at some point, he wanted to be free with you. And that was not this Astarion. 

Despite all that, just for this moment, you wanted to forget it all. To be held in his arms once again. Maybe, if the gods blessed you, see a real smile of his. You just wanted this one moment. Then your greedy heart would be satisfied. You could burn this image of the two of you dancing forever in your mind and have it sustain you. You’d gladly take another trip to the hells if it meant just a moment where you could pretend you were with your astarion. The one that lived on in your memories. Though you didn’t dare hope that he was still in there somewhere, you don’t think your heart could take it. 

You inhale deeply and begin to talk. You tell him about the quests you’ve been on, the adventures you’ve had, what you’ve been up to these past years. Including why you were here, and your quest to help Karlach and find the frostbite tear.

Eventually, you get to the point where you tell him why you're here, and what you're looking for. But as you do you see a scowl twist on his face. 

“Astarion?” You question, “What’s bothering you?”

He huffs in reply, and you can’t help but smirk. 

“I’m sorry but I do remember someone just talking about how petty the silent treatment is.” You prod, and lock eyes, a sign for him to tell you what’s on his mind

He rolls his eyes at your persistence, but nonetheless, he begins to speak. 

“Hm. Just seems like you and Karlach are so very happy together. A bit of a downgrade if you ask me, but that’s certainly no fault of hers. I mean, once you’ve had me, all you can do is go down from there.” 

“Karlach and I aren’t dating.” You deadpan. 

She was more like a sister to you than anything, and besides you’re pretty sure she already has eyes for someone. 

“Oh?” Astarions eyebrow raises. “So who have you been shagging all these years then? Wyll? Shadowheart? Surely not Gale. Oh please tell me it’s not Gale, I think that might actually hurt my feelings a little if we both shared being to your tastes.” 

“Be nice. Gales is a good friend. FRIEND. They all are. And to answer your prying question, I’m not with anyone. Not since you.” 

It was true. You hadn’t loved anyone since astarion. It just didn’t feel right. Even the idea of a casual fling didn’t feel at all satisfying. And there was no way you would actually consider dating someone again. Not when Astarion still held your heart. 

You could see a few emotions go across Astarion’s face, but you couldn’t recognize them. You remember when you used to be able to know what he was thinking, when he was lying or not. But not anymore. Maybe it was because he was always putting on some act now. 

As you stared, his hand wrapped around your waist and for a breathless moment, he effortlessly lifted you up into the air, gently twirling you around him. then he put you down and smoothly continued the dance as if that was always part of the steps. 

Your face flushed at the amount of contact, and the smirk once again graced Astarion’s lips.

“So, nobody since me? Seems like someone’s not quite over the Lord of Baldur’s Gate.” He singsonged, taking great pleasure in how momentarily flustered you were. “It's ok if you're not over me darling, I can’t blame you.” 

Clearly, he meant this as a joke, one you were supposed to roll your eyes at and ignore. But there was no point in lying, so you just nodded and continued the steps of the dance. 

Astarion stopped dead in his tracks. 

“I-

Wait what? You're still-

Ah- 

You're not over me?” 

“Astarion, the song isn’t over.” You tried to nudge him back into the dance, but his feet were planted firmly, and he wasn’t going to budge. 

“Answer me.” 

You sigh. He wasn’t going to move. So now you were just standing here. In the middle of a ballroom. With everyone else dancing around you. Great. This was super inconspicuous and undercover. 

“I will only continue to talk if you move your damn feet Astarion. Hells I’m supposed to be blending in not standing out.” You hiss and kick at the side of his shoes to indicate for him to get moving.

He recognizes the determination in your eyes and you can see him deciding mentally that he’ll probably get his answer sooner if he does as you ask, so he picks up the dance once again. His grip on your waist is now like iron though, not painful in any way, but there’s absolutely no way you could get out of his grasp now. Not even if you put all your efforts into trying. 

His eyes never left yours, his intense stare practically commanding you to talk.

Which you did say you would do. 

“I still love you.” You shrug. “Never stopped loving you.”

“Then why did you leave?” The hurt in his voice is evident, and you immediately feel like someone hurled a spear of ice directly into your chest. 

You can barely raise your voice above a whisper without it cracking. “You know why. I already told you when I left.” 

“Bullshit. Because you loved the person that I was? He was pathetic. Only a fool would want the lesser version.” His voice was like ice, you could feel the hatred he held for himself.

And you instantly felt your anger flare up at his words.

“Don’t you ever talk about-

About him like that”

It felt weird referring to past Astarion as someone else. But it was true. They were two completely different people now. And honestly, you didn’t care about the semantics, your blood was practically boiling. 

“He was the love of my life. He was everything to me. So don’t you dare insult him.” You spat, practically seeing red

Astarion's face twisted in rage. 

“Maybe you liked me pathetic, hm? Maybe the only way you could possibly love me was if I was beneath you. A precious pet spawn, entirely dependent on you, living in your shadow to protect me from the sun that I now bask in.” He sneered, meeting your rage with his own.

And just like that, you had shattered all over again. 

It was your turn to stop dancing now, unmoving in the sea of swaying nobles. 

Astarion's rage seemed to have flickered out seeing the look on your face.

What did your face look like? Were you shocked? Were you crying? Somewhere in the back of your mind, you could register the feeling of hot tears down your cheeks, but you paid it no heed. 

Instead, you wrapped your arms around Astarion, putting your face in the crook of his neck. 

Astarion completely froze at the sudden contact, not even taking a breath. Although he probably didn’t need to actually breathe anyways so maybe that was normal.

“I’m sorry. If-

-If you truly believe that I ever thought that way about you, then I messed up beyond repair. I'm so sorry.” 

You tried to continue, to apologize for all the times you had failed him. For making him feel like that. But you realized you couldn’t speak. Your body was silently heaving with sobs, tears flowing down your face and ruining Astarion's nice clothing.

Great. You couldn’t even cry without screwing him over. And this was definitely not inconspicuous. 

You lifted your head, making a move to step away, but as you did you saw a blue glint on one of the lapels of some well-dressed lord.

Holy shit.

The frostbite tear. You had found it. And all it took was sobbing on your ex to spot the damn thing. That didn’t make you feel pathetic at all. Though admittedly this was the perfect distraction from this soul-crushing conversation. Maybe with any luck you wouldn’t even have to address that embarrassing display that no doubt disgusted astarion, he was probably hoping you’d get the hell off him already.

So you did just that, jerking back from the hug and keeping your eyes glued on the gem. 

“Astarion look. It’s the frostbite tear. On that lord.”

But you could tell Astarion’s eyes were firmly glued to your face. 

You tried to slip away, to follow the frostbite tears owner and relieve him from its ownership, whether that be by swiping it, lying, or just straight up threatening the guy. But Astarion held you firmly in place. 

“What are you doing?” You whispered, to not startle your target. “He’s right there. Let go.”

“You can’t just drop that on me and leave” he whisper-yelled back 

“I’m not leaving, I’m just grabbing something real quick. Now let go, it’ll take 5 minutes tops.”

“What if you decide you don’t wanna talk again and run off?” He countered 

“Then you can corner me because you're the vampire ascendant.” 

“What if he catches you and you get arrested?”

“Then you can visit me in jail because you're the vampire ascendant.” 

“What if-“

Oh for fucks sake. 

“Whatever happens, I assure you, you will be able to say whatever you want to me after because you are the vampire ascendant. You made that fact very clear to me when we were together. Now let go.” You cut him off, and then try once again to move towards the target. But his grip remained firm 

You look up at him, now filled with annoyance and desperation. The noble could escape if you didn’t do something now, and yet Astarion seemed insistent on trapping you. 

“Just one more dance, alright?” He bargained.

Unbelievable. That was his priority? You knew it had been a while but you never expected him to disregard a former ally so blatantly. Karlach needed this. 

But upon closer inspection, he almost looked… a little guilty? Worried maybe? That didn’t seem right. What on earth?

Just then, Astarion pushed your face into his chest, wrapping his arms around you, almost protective. Protective but restrictive. You couldn’t move away no matter how much you pushed on his chest or tried to slip out of his hold. 

“Astarion. Let. Go.” You hissed.

But your attempts at breaking free immediately stopped when you heard an ear-piercing screech and the sound of heavy footsteps. 

On instinct, you reached for where your weapon would normally be, but you had nothing on you. Shadowheart had a few small weapons concealed on her in case things got messy, considering her attire was a bit more conservative than yours, but she wasn’t anywhere near you now. 

Damnit. On instinct, you tried to twist around in Astarion's grasp to a more protective stance. Of course, you knew he didn’t need your protection at all, it was just a base instinct kicking in. Unfortunately, he didn’t allow you to move out of his grasp, so all you could do was squirm. 

“What is wrong with you??” You practically shouted. If there was danger, then just standing here like this would leave you both wide open. Had he lost all common sense? 

Unless- 

At that exact point, a guard of the lord of Sossal burst through the doors, covered in blood. 

“Vampire spawn are attacking the gates!” She exclaimed, cradling her arm, which was profusely bleeding. 

“I didn’t know you would be here.” He murmurs, almost as if he’s telling this to himself more than you. 

He wasn’t trying to keep you here, you realize. He was protecting you. None of the spawn would dare come near you if they saw Astarion holding you like this. 

But at this moment you didn’t care. For years you had mourned over the loss of your Astarion. You had tried so hard, attempting to separate him from this ascended Astarion. But you had never been truly able to get over him, to accept he was gone. Because deep, deep down, no matter what you told yourself, you still believed he was in there somewhere. Behind all the silks and sharp gazes.

And you felt that hope die as you heard the hissing of the dozens of spawn outside, mingled with the screams and cries of the guards. He was gone. And your heart was shattered all over again. 

But it was different this time. Before, you had pulled yourself together again, deformed and jagged, but still together. You couldn’t do that this time. There was no coming back from this. You could feel it. This pain wouldn’t fade. But there was something else there that wasn’t there before. Anger.

Astarion was protecting you, yes, but Gale, Shadowheart, and Karlach were here too. If the spawn got into the ballroom, they would be in danger. Not to mention this made procuring the frostbite tear infinitely more difficult. 

Rage burned in your eyes, and for the first time, you saw the great vampire ascendant stumble over his words a little, as he tried to explain something about how the lord of Sossal had insulted him, but you weren’t listening. 

While Astarion was struggling to explain himself, you realized he wasn’t paying as much attention to you. Good.

In one swift movement, you slipped out of his grasp and frantically looked around, searching for your friends. It was nearly impossible to hear anything over the screaming and panic of the nobles. It also wasn’t helping that Astarion was probably going to be right on your heels the second he recovered. Or maybe he’d just leave you to be eaten by his spawn. You didn’t really care. 

After continuing to weave your way past frantic nobles and shouting their names, you were able to see a red hand waving you down from the far left balcony. It was Karlach, and she was with Gale and Shadowheart. Good. With all 3 of them together any spawn that came after them would be screwed. But you still had a mission to complete.

You looked up at Shadowheart and held your hand out for a weapon. You were going to track down that damn gem if it killed you. That noble was about to have a very bad day. Well. A worse day. 

You were focusing all your hurt onto this, all your rage. But you needed to. You needed it because you had no idea what else you could do now. You needed something to focus on. Something to distract you from your shattered heart. 

Shadowheart saw your determination and tossed a short sword down to you. Not your preferred weapon of choice, but it would do.

You whipped around, hand around the short sword at the ready, but also because it felt grounding, to be fighting once again. Now it was time to hunt down your prey.

You quickly ran in the direction you’d last seen, glancing over every lapel for that glowing blue light. It was hard, many of the nobles were dressed in a winter theme, so shades of white, silver, and blue were all too common in the sea of panic. 

You continued to push past nobles, searching for that faint blue glow. You refused to let this go, you would not let Karlach down. You fought for too many years in hell getting the engine in her repaired to go all the way back to square one again. 

You feel yourself tunnel vision on finding a blue light, your head whipping back and forth on the hunt, it felt good to let everything else fade away into numbness as your only thought is tracking down this gem.

A glimmer out of the corner of your eye. A flash of blue. The shine of fine silk. There he was. In a crowd of panicked nobles trying to run into other parts of the castle and hide from Astarion's horde gathering outside. Honestly, it was a pretty understandable reaction, you didn't blame him for running at all, but you needed that gem. You hope he survived honestly.

Survived.

Because Astarion planned to turn this place into a bloodbath. Your Astarion. The one who you had sat under the stars with, and he would teach you all the constellations whose names you didn't know, his silky voice lulling you to sleep when insomnia or worry had hit you. 

You'd rather still be in the hells honestly. 

You took a deep breath, centering yourself back to the present. Get the gem. 

You dashed after the noble, drawing your shortsword and charging at the man. If possible, you'd do this quickly.

Ducking under the other guests, you grab this unfortunate noble by the collar, the moment you do he screeches, clearly fearing the worst. Luckily for him, you were only after his gem, not his blood. With one slice you cut the gem off the cloak, shredding the beautiful white fabric. 

Not even bothering to explain yourself to him, you pocket your prize and turn on your heel, heading back in your friend's direction, when all of a sudden you hear the noble you had just stolen from scream again. But this time it was followed by the screams of a few others 

You look back and that’s when you see her. A vampire spawn. Clearly on her way to the ballroom, but judging by her smile, it was clear she had just found some horderves. 

You could have run. You were the only person with a weapon and the farthest away from her. She definitely wouldn’t pick you as her first target, she’d go for one of the defenseless nobles right next to her. You should have met up with the others and gotten the hells out of this place.

But the noble whose lapel you had just torn apart was so young. They were people. Scared people who got unlucky and were about to die because someone had offended the great vampire ascendant. Maybe you wanted to save them. But more likely, you just wanted something to take your anger out on. Or maybe you were just dumb as a rock.

But regardless you turned around and began to sprint towards the spawn instead of away, angling your weapon so that you would have the perfect angle to go for her collarbone. 

Yet as soon as you locked her on as a target, her eyes went wide with..fear? She was a vampire spawn, surely she’d had a few of her victims fight back yes? Was this her first hunt? 

Soon you realized that wasn’t the case at all as you felt a chill run down your spine. Even now with all his power, it wasn’t hard for you to identify the presence now standing menacingly right behind you. The familiar smell of bergamot filled your senses with the closeness. You could feel his chest pressed against your back. You didn’t know what kind of face Astarion was making right now, but whatever it was, it terrified the vampire spawn, her form now shaking and cowering before her master. 

Funny. Even now after everything, you couldn’t find astarion scary. You probably should, considering how he just appeared behind you. But after everything you still couldn’t. 

There was no point in delaying this any further. You turn around, and as you do his eyes immediately move from the spawn back to you. And his gaze softened. Before this whole ordeal that single action probably would have caused you to melt. But now it was different. You had already resigned yourself to being without him. You couldn’t turn back time. You couldn’t save him. All you could do now was try and find a way forward. And you certainly wouldn’t find that staring into his crimson eyes. 

This felt awful. You felt awful. Walking away from him now didn’t feel like closure, it felt like someone had just stopped writing on the page mid-sentence. But you had to stop. Just stop. You couldn’t spend the rest of your life like this, mourning what you lost. Astarion would have an eternity to forget about you, but you only had this one life. And for the first time in a long time, you finally felt like you wanted to move forward with your life. To start living again. You were still mad. And upset. And it still hurt. But you wanted to get better. 

So you turned around, not looking at Astarion, and left. Walked right past him without saying a word. You didn’t know what he would do. Let you leave and forget you ever existed? Grab your arm and try to talk again? Decide he had had enough and just drain you dry? You honestly had no idea anymore. But you knew one thing.

You wouldn’t be the one to look back.

[aayakashii]

I wrote this in like 2 hours so I apologize if it's bad but!!! I was struck with inspiration and had to write it + I am a sucker for fics abt dancing because I'm a dancer so ✋️ ANYWAYS

Pairing: Romeo Lucci x MC

Tags: PINING; romeo doesnt accept his feelings; gender neutral MC; the song that is mentioned in this fic is this one

the house never loses

The casino had closed for the night.

Fragments of life were scattered on the floor – pieces of glass, candy wrappers, dirtied pills, crushed beer cans.

Romeo curled his lips in disgust.

Everyone was distasteful. Brute, graceless little things that only served to be his source of income. Couldn't even clean up after themselves, the mindless sheep, blinded by the possibility of being rich quickly.

He wasnt really one to judge, but at least he was smart.

He knew he had to win. He had to be the dealer, the house, no matter the situation. He would never be the customer.

That was how things fall apart.

You lose control, someone else pull the strings of your life and then you trip – and fall. And lose, lose, lose. One bet after the other, golden coins falling through the cracks of the floor underneath you, forever out of reach.

No, he couldn't be anything else besides the dealer, he wouldn't allow otherwise. He had his family as a bitter example of steps he should not follow.

Still, under this position of power, he saw all the grimy beings that walked on this godforsaken place – traitors and hypocrites that tried to hide their greed behind a mask – and he hated them all.

"Dirty pricks that can't even pick up after themselves", he thought, kicking another empty beer can.

He wouldn't clean it, however. Obviously. He had his pawns to do that for him and today, specifically, he had the worthless honor student do that job for him.

He sighed, massaging his forehead to ease the wrinkle between his brows.

"Honor, my ass", he mumbled, remembering how they messed up yet another prototype order earlier that day, which landed them the merciless job of cleaning the casino after it was closed.

Romeo clicked his tongue, remembering the faces of the rest of the staff once they realized they would have a night off at the expense of someone else.

In the end, it was a dog eat dog situation. He wouldn't be surprised if people started sabotaging them just to get more days off. He put this sudden conclusion at the back of his mind, patting himself on the back for being so smart and way ahead of everyone around him. Then, he stepped on a cigarette butt and stained the burgundy carpet with its ashes.

"Where the fuck is that basic bitch?" he groaned, kicking the cigarette butt under one of the poker tables, maneuvering faster between all the stools, readying himself to give them the scolding of a lifetime.

He expects excellency from himself – it's only natural he expects the same from everyone around him, although this habit always seems to leave him disappointed.

Romeo's ears perked up as he stomped his way towards the back of the casino.

It housed the bar area, with a small stage for (now rare) jazz performances – after Sinostra was banned from leaving the campus, it also meant people from outside were also banned from coming in. Believe it or not, there aren't many jazz musicians among university students.

The bar stood behind matte glass doors that kept the sound muffled for those that wanted to drown their sorrows away after losing one too many games.

Romeo made his way to the entrance of the bar, as his ears picked up a few stray music notes coming from the inside of the place. He readied himself to scold whatever student was inside after closing hours – after all, if they wanted to use the space, then they should pay for it. It's only obvious.

He opened the door quietly, in order to catch them by surprise, squinting as he tried to assess who was inside despite the permanent mist of cigarette smoke that hung in the air.

The song came from a phone that stood on the bar counter, the words too jumbled and distorted by the busted speakers, but with a melancholy that touched him still.

He opened his mouth to call out whoever was inside, yet the words stuck on his tongue like cheap candy.

The first thing he saw were the arms.

The arms moved slowly, as if they were swimming in honey. Fingers grasped the thick air that surrounded them and seemed to mold it into a silk veil that surrounded their body.

Then, he saw the legs.

Softly, silently, they carried their body through slow twirls. They lifted one of them up, bare foot en pointe, landing it graciously to once again turn around themselves.

And finally, he saw their face.

Eyes half lidded in pure concentration, they saw nothing but the world they created for themselves as they danced.

The words died inside Romeo's mouth as he saw his worthless honor student dance to the song.

He gulped harshily as he watched them grab their own chest, suffering silently for some estranged lover they were probably seeing in their mind's eye as they danced.

Romeo felt his own heart race, his purple eyes going red and teary as he tried not to blink, so he wouldn't miss any moment. His stomach twisted inside out – or, at least, it was how he felt it – as he wondered if they were thinking of anyone specific while they looked so desperately in love.

His breath hitched at the thought and he discarded it in a pile of things he would rather not think about, on the corners of his mind.

They threw their arms out slowly, as if they wanted to hug the entire world – or fly away from it, only to lose it all while they bring their hands to their face, in theatrical despair.

Romeo wondered how it would feel to be the one in between their arms and loved so desperately, and the thought was too big, to persistent to be put aside.

His hands twitched as he tried to take a step inside and ask who was it that they thought of as they ran their hands on their lips and body, but as he heard the song grow into its highest peak, Romeo instinctively closed the door, before he could see whether or not that secret performance would have a happy ending or a sad one.

He rested his head against the glass, feeling the coolness of it spread on his flushed face.

Romeo put his hand against his heart, feeling the fast beats in contrast with the muffled and slow ending of the song inside, and breathed deeply, realizing he had been holding his breath like a predator does with a prey on the wild.

"Romeo?" their voice sounded shaky and scared, as if they had just been caught committing a crime. As if they were his prey.

Romeo cleared his throat and opened the door once again, this time fierce and quickly.

"Ah, there you are, you BB." they winced as he yelled the insulting abbreviation "I was looking for you. Didn't you see how dirty the casino is? You are supposed to clean everything, not just this place."

Romeo saw as they pursed their lips, looking down, an expression of annoyance and sadness making itself clear on their face.

"I- I know. I was just finishing here." They lied, dejected.

"Well. I expect this place to be spotless by tomorrow. I don't care if you need to spend all night here. Just do your job!"

"Yes, Romeo." they sighed loudly, picking up a broom, and then walked briskly past him, frustratingly avoiding him as much as possible.

Deep inside, however, he knew he couldn't possibly blame them. Not with the venom he spits on their face at every single encounter.

Romeo kept looking inside of the room, staring at the phone they left on the bar counter, consciously refusing to observe them as they walked somewhere else inside the casino.

He refused to look at them as they moved graciously between the tables; refused to think about the faint scent of vanilla mixed with cigarette and sweat on their body; refused to acknowledge his racing heart; and refused to look them in their eyes for too long.

Romeo refused to lose control of his own strings.

After all, he was the dealer, he was the house.

He wasn't supposed to lose.

[stuffeddeer]

i just had a thought. imagine something like when you and normal dazai were best friends (maybe apart of the buraiha trio too, or squad in that case) but what i mean is close-close kinda best friends. but if thats too basic i think we can add mutual pining with no confession in it. and then take that scenario into the beast au, where you two are still close, but work in very different fields and still have that mutual pining, and can never be together no matter how close you two become - whether it be forbidden because of work fields or just.. the whole phase 5 ordeal. or something else! do you think he'd try to get away or get closer? please i need more thoughts on this scenario i love angsty things

+ can i be 🦴 anon? tysm! :)

My thoughts on smitten beast!Dazai | Bungo Stray Dogs | Dazai x reader

wehehehehe i loveee beast!zai gm 🦴anon!!!! i would like to apologize in advance bc my thoughts are jumbled and incoherent on my best days LMAO

okay here’s what i’m thinking. either you’re a part of his plan or you aren’t - either he has something he wants to change for you like he’s doing with oda, or you’re merely another piece of the puzzle. depending on which you fall under, how he’ll act will be different. being a part of his scheme, falling under the subject of someone whose life he wants to change, will lead to him alienating himself from you like how he did to oda - knowing that he has to isolate himself away from you so you can live a longer or better life. dazai understood the only way oda would live in the light and write his novel was if he pushed him to and killed himself, so he’d do the same for you, dying happily knowing it’s better for you.

but…. if you aren’t part of his plan, i don't think he'd mind still finding you and courting you :) had it merely been mutual pining in other lives, maybe he wants to see what it'd be like to actually date you! he already knows everything you like, so from the very second you two meet, he's showing up with your favorite flowers ("they just reminded me of you") and chocolates or whatever sweets you adore ("i bought too much and couldn't finish"). he'd take you on cute little dates he doesn't label dates until you get frustrated and ask him if he's just leading you on, wondering why he never holds your hand or heaven forbid kisses you! and dazai will just laugh and confess, telling you he wanted to take it slow or some other bogus excuse you don't have the time to pry into as he kisses you 🙂‍↕️

dazai will 100% enjoy every moment he can with you!!!! he knows it's rapidly approaching his end so he makes sure you're allll set up (he sets aside a disgusting amount of money in some share for you to take from at your leisure post mortem). he understands he's a busy guy, but always makes sure to shower you in love when you're around, knowing he won't be able to much longer :/

of course, he could also try pushing you away as he nears his end, but i still think he'd try and hold you close before that. say toward the end he starts more fights and distances himself. you're confused wondering why he has started to pull back, and he just tells you work is rough. i think dazai would try to subtly let you know what's coming, mentioning his line of work breeds resentment and leads to many a death, like how the previous boss died (....kind of) and the one before. he'd want you prepared, and preferably happy, but understands that he selfishly didn't let you to pass by his final phase without some sort of grieving. dazai would have regrets in that sense, but understand there's not much he can do about it now except try and prepare you for the inevitable.

[prinzrupprecht]

Okita x reader who has a dream he cheated on her and she woke up crying

Just a Dream

I like this idea! Imma try to make this fluff and emotional as possible.

Synopsis: You’ve been with him for a long time. He was everything to you but were you the same to him? Your thoughts and worries plagued your mind one night into dreaming of him falling for the daughter of the most known doctor in all of Kyoto. You knew her as well and your head was spinning with thoughts. Were you doubting him now?

CW: hurt/comfort

WC: 1035

He was confusing sometimes. One moment he would be all affectionate and lovey with you, and the next you barely existed in his world. Which is it? You could smile painfully and believe he still means every word that you’re his or pretend he doesn’t exist as well.

You could still remember the day Kondo took Souji in, you felt sorry for him. Souji never experienced any real connections with someone other than his sister who abandoned him. It took many months or years for him to completely trust you but he trusted Kondo more easily. Your heart swelled from the fond memories.

You went to go to sleep and saw Souji already sleeping in his tatami mat. You sighed as expected of him. He was tired from training all day. He liked sleeping in your room for some reason. Even though he could sleep in the main hall with the other boys, he claimed they tried to snuggle him in their sleep and it was claustrophobic sleeping in a room full of other people. He could sleep in Kondo’s room but he said he snores too much. You told him to sleep outside once and he refused. Yet he sometimes snuggles you at night and when you woke up to him sleeping too close to you a few times, he claimed that’s because he was too cold and wanted warmth. Ya right…

Stubbornness ran in him. He threatened other members if they tried to pursue any relationship with you and claimed you were already taken but never said who. You were unaware of this.

As you were a part of Kondo’s group, everyone stayed at different lodges when they were trying to gain recognition from the Tokugawa shogunate. Most of the Roshigumi would sleep in one room. You always got one of the spare rooms and as much as great that was, Souji would only sleep in your room no matter where you guys end up staying at.

As you closed your eyes and decided to sleep for once, your mind was still plagued with thoughts of what-if scenarios. You couldn’t control your thoughts when you were sleeping.

The future was uncertain… your dreams could be just playing with your head.

Yet your mind thought of her— the nice girl who was the daughter of the best doctor in Kyoto. Your jealousy couldn’t be stopped whenever you saw her talk to Souji a few times in the past. You could tell she was into him judging by the amount of times she would only talk to him and barely acknowledge your existence. She was kind, and pretty but that was about it. What if he decided to accept her feelings? Your last thoughts shouldn’t have been about her before drifting to sleep.

~ not even an hour has passed by

Your eyes snapped open while one hand flew to your face and forehead. Why were there tear stains on your cheeks? “I had to wake you, sorry about that.” Souji was sitting next to you and was worried. You didn't say anything as you were trying to calm yourself in the moment. Your heart was still in pain from the dream you had. Him falling in love with someone else? Her of all people? It didn't settle right with you.

“Why did you say my name?” he had asked which made your face turn red.

“It’s uh… I don’t remember anymore,” your words stammered as you turned your head away from him. Souji didn’t want to say he heard more but the sentences were jumbled in your sleep for him to understand any of what you said. He knew you were lying.

“Can you tell me? Maybe I could make you feel better?” He sat on his knees next to you and you had no idea how to bring up what you had dreamt about.

“It’s uh… you and that girl who likes you,” you mumbled while lifting the top cover up to your face.

“Someone likes me? You?” he was clearly playing around with your head, or was he this oblivious to his surroundings?

“I mean… you know that girl who comes around a lot who’s really pretty and has a reputation for being the daughter of the most famous doctor in this city… she only waves and talks to you. I had a dream that you two were too close, I shouldn’t get into details…” you didn’t want to get specific about your dream. Your head was starting to hurt.

“You think I’d do that to you?” he was slightly hurt that a dream of him doing things that he wouldn’t ever do could hurt you this badly.

“N—No, of course not. It just felt so real in my head but when I woke up… the painful feeling just went away.” You sighed and felt Souji shift a bit in his spot so that he could hold you this time.

“I thought that I made it obvious that I really like you,” he pulled you close to him to comfort you. He knew you felt the same for a while but wanted more confirmation. For the longest time when Kondo took him in, you used to hold him at night and now he’s the one holding you.

“I’m so glad, I want it to stay that way.” You were tired still and he wasn’t going anywhere.

Souji didn’t say anything while he stayed awake for a bit longer to make sure you’d fall asleep soundlessly before he would sleep again. He was a bit distressed that you had a bit of doubts about him.

It just means he would make sure to prove that you were the only one he wanted.

Note: I had to make this short so it wouldn’t feel horrible to drag it out. I’ll be back on To Live or Die next.

[avocadorablepirate]

What Do We Call This? - 12

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Pairing: Trafalgar Law x fem!reader

Summary: On a quest to find what you've been looking for, you acquire the help of the Straw Hat pirates, who've agreed to let you temporarily join them. There are however many challenges that come along with your temporary recruitment - an alliance with a certain Trafalgar Law being one of them.

Word Count: 2.1K

Warnings: fluff, angst, kinda slow burn, swearing, the occasional OP spoiler

A/N: I'm too sleep deprived to proofread the entire final part, so I decided I’d split it. But honestly I don’t know what the heck I’ve written here either.

The next part will probably come out some time during the week, or I’ll just post it next week. Anyway, I hope you like it!

—⁠☆✿☆—⁠

The celebration after the battle should have been a moment of relief for Law. Two Yonko’s had been defeated, thus ending the alliance with the Straw Hats. They had finally accomplished the initial goal of the alliance, and yet Law found it hard to join in on the festivities. His mind was occupied by the tension between you and him. He had tried to approach you several times during the night, only to be met with avoidance, and it was driving him to the edge.

Fortunately, he finally managed to corner you at one of the stalls, and pulled you along to a quiet corner. However, the initial determination that he had felt before talking to you, instantly dissipated at your words.

"Your alliance with the Straw Hats is over. That means you won't be sailing with them any longer." You paused, taking a breath as if gathering the strength to continue, and Law felt a sense of dread wash over him as he braced himself for your next words. "And since I'm onboard their ship, that means we won't be sailing together any longer."

The words hit Law like a punch to the gut—something he had dreaded but always feared would come. However, hearing it aloud was an entirely different matter. The whole reason he had wanted to talk to you was to sort things out, and then gather the courage to ask you to join his crew. He had always hoped that maybe a part of you would have liked to come with him. Now, that hope was shattered.

As you continued, Law watched you avoid his gaze, clearly struggling with your own emotions. His mind raced. He knew you were wrong, that his feelings for you went beyond mere protectiveness. But his words came out in a jumbled rush. "(Y/N)-ya, that's—that's not what I meant—"

You cut him off, shaking your head firmly, and with your final words to him turned and left. Law clenched his fists, frustration and helplessness bubbling inside him. He watched as you walked away, each step feeling like a knife twisting deeper into his heart. He wanted to call out to you, to stop you, but the words were stuck in his throat.

That night, Law found no peace. He wandered the festival with his crew in a daze, his mind replaying your conversation over and over. The celebrations around him felt like a cruel joke, a stark contrast to the turmoil within him. You had said that maybe you would meet in the future, but Law knew that in this line of work, it was very unlikely. The thought of this being the last time he saw you shook him to the core, and he was desparate to do something about it. But what could he do? You had already made up your mind.

_____________________________________________

As Law exchanged “farewells” with Luffy and Kid, he stole a glance at the Thousand Sunny, hoping to see you. But you were already inside the ship, likely avoiding him, or so he assumed. As he boarded his own ship, Bepo approached him, worry plastered across his face, "Captain are you sure we're ready to leave? You said you wouldn't leave without her."

Law gritted his teeth, those hadn't been his exact words when he had told his crew about asking you to join them, but in his heart he knew that was what he meant. Leave it to Bepo, to know exactly what he was thinking.

"Raise the anchor," was all he said as he walked further into the ship.

The Polar Tang set sail, the Thousand Sunny and the Victoria Punk not far from it. As if not already irritated, Eustass' snide remark only seemed to serve as fuel to Law's raging annoyance. Ignoring his crew's protests, Law yanked at the helm, steering the ship towards the very waterfall they had climbed to reach Wano.

While his crew braced for impact, Law stood determined. His thoughts however, drifted to you. Luffy had done the very same thing as him, and just like the Polar Tang, the Thousand Sunny was plunging down the same waterfall. "Strawhat-ya that idiot!" Law muttered under his breath (rather hypocritically). His gaze shifted to the Thousand Sunny, and what he saw left him reeling. In an instant, he summoned a blue orb.

_____________________________________________

You were helping load supplies onto the ship when you heard faint voices come from the harbour below: Kid, Luffy and Law. After your conversation with him at the festival, you had called it an early night and started your morning loading the Sunny to avoid running into him. But now, something urged you to take one last look at Law, to just lean over the railing and catch a glimpse of him. So you did just that.

Law stood next to Luffy, his usual stoic expression in place, except now the dark circles that lined his eyes were all the more prominent. A pang of guilt swept over you, knowing you might be the cause.

"You should go down and say goodbye to him." A voice jolted you away from the railing. Your face flushed when you found Robin standing behind you, a knowing smile on her face as she let out a chuckle. Her eyes sparkled with amusement, making you feel a bit self-conscious.

"What?" you asked, flustered.

"You want to talk to him, don't you?" she said gently, her smile widening as she watched your reaction.

"We already did last night," you muttered, trying to hide your unease. You looked away, focusing on the supplies in front of you.

"A real man would say goodbye to you again," Franky chimed in from behind a stack of crates, and despite yourself, you let out a soft laugh. You went back to your task, trying to push away any thoughts that made you question your decision. But as you lifted another crate, you couldn't help but steal another glance over the railing. Law was walking away from Luffy and to his ship, figure slowly disappearing from your view.

The Thousand Sunny set sail, and you busied yourself with organizing the remaining supplies, lost in thought, and completely unaware of Kid's taunting remarks. It wasn't until you heard Usopp and Chopper pleading with Luffy that you snapped out of it.

"What's going on?" You approached Sanji, who watched the pair desparately try to hold back Luffy from the helm. Before he could respond the roar of water filled your ears, and your heart raced with fear as the ship suddenly plummeted.

Instinctively, you grabbed onto the nearest stable object, which happened to be Sanji. Clinging to him in fear for your life, you left the cook stunned.

Luckily, the Sunny landed safely in the waters below. You sighed in relief as you released Sanji and fell to your knees, desperately trying to catch your breath.

"(Y/N)-chan~," you heard Sanji gleefully call out to you moments later, though his voice sounded almost muffled. The next thing you heard was Sanji cursing at Law. As you looked up to see what was the cause of his irritation, a familiar sensation washed over you - a feeling of displacement. You shut your eyes in fear as you felt nothing beneath you, bracing for impact. But instead of a rough hardwood floor or the cold ocean water, you felt a pair of arms around your waist and back.

You opened your eyes to find yourself aboard the Polar Tang, in Law's arms. His grip was firm, and his eyes held a mix of frustration and desperation. For a moment, you were lost in his intense gaze, but reality quickly set in.

"Tra! Give her back!"

"What are you doing?" you exclaimed, trying to wriggle out of his hold. "You can't just teleport me here!"

Law set you down, his eyes locking onto yours. "I'm not going to let you go with them," he stated firmly, leaving no room for argument. "The Straw Hats don’t understand how your powers work. If you go with them you'll keep hurting yourself, pushing yourself until it's too late." Law's expression hardened. "I won’t let you go," he said, his voice laced with determination.

You took a step back, shaking your head. "This isn't your decision to make. Transport me back to the Sunny," you demanded.

Law remained silent, his eyes never leaving yours. His jaw tightened, and it became clear that he had no intention of complying. Frustration bubbled up inside you. You glanced behind, seeing the Sunny getting farther away.

"Send me back now," you said, your voice resolute, but Law shook his head. "It's too far now. Stay on the Polar Tang."

Not wanting to hear anymore protests, Law turned away, leaving you on the deck, and headed into the sub, instructing his crew to follow. Only Ikkaku stayed behind. She approached you with a somber expression, offering a hug when she saw your tear-filled eyes.

"C'mon, let's get you some tea."

She led you to the kitchen, sitting you down at the table before making a cup of tea. Once it was ready, Ikkaku sat beside you, gently nudging you to get your attention when she noticed you staring blankly at the table.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked noting your pained expression. Her question was enough to break you - opening the flood gates. You buried your head in your hands, trying to hide your tears, but Ikkaku had already noticed, pulling you into another hug as she stroked your back in comfort.

As you clung to her, your shoulders shaking with each sob, the weight of your frustration and helplessness poured out. It wasn't just about being left on the Polar Tang; it was the feeling of having no control, of being swept along by decisions made without you. Ikkaku's steady presence and gentle touch were the only anchors you had in that moment of emotional turbulence. The warmth of her embrace slowly began to calm the storm inside you, bit by bit.

After a while, you managed to pull yourself together, your breathing becoming steadier. Ikkaku didn't rush you, allowing you to take the time you needed. She continued to sit beside you, her hand soothingly rubbing your back.

"Why does he have to make things so difficult," you mumbled, sucking in a breath as you tried to calm yourself.

Ikkaku handed you the steaming cup, her expression sympathetic. "He's just worried about you. But I admit, he should have handled it differently."

Once you had managed to regulate your breathing you took a sip of the tea, the warmth soothing you slightly. "I get that he's worried, but he can't just force me to stay here. It’s not fair."

Ikkaku nodded, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. "I know, and I'm sure Law knows too. He just let his feelings cloud his judgment."

You looked down at your cup, your emotions swirling. A silence settled between you, broken only by the soft hum of the submarine.

"Hey, why don't you get some sleep for now. We can figure this out tomorrow," Ikkaku suggested, finally breaking the silence. She hesitated, but added, "Maybe we can find a way to get you back to the Straw Hats," she said with a small smile, and you tried to offer her one as well, feeling a bit of the weight lift off your shoulders, despite knowing that it would probably be months before you saw the Straw Hat pirates again. "Thank you, Ikkaku."

Unbeknownst to you, Law had been listening. After talking to his crew, he had intended to retreat to his quarters to collect his thoughts. However, as he passed by the kitchen he heard the sound of crying, and he couldn't bring himself to walk away, stopping at the door when he recognised your voice alongside Ikkaku’s. He quietly listened to your conversation, and his heart sank when he heard your words, immediately regretting the pain he had caused you.

As footsteps approached the kitchen door, Law swiftly stepped back, attempting to compose himself. He debated leaving but hesitated, knowing you were about to exit. Moments later, you emerged from the kitchen, your eyes red and swollen from tears, and you locked gazes with him.

"(Y/N)-ya," he began, his voice strained with regret, but you cut him off.

"Don't," you said, voice hoarse. "I don't want to hear it. "

You turned away from him, heading towards your cabin, and Law watched with a heavy heart, tempted to pull you back. But he stopped himself, hoping that if he gave you your space, eventually he could explain himself to you, and you would understand.

_____________________________________________

A/N: I hope the next part doesn’t seem too rushed considering it’s the ending :/

taglist: @trafalgardaria @deathsmajestysworld @cottoncandyloverrrr @magnificenttaledreamland @kitsunechan707

[gloomyteddybear]

dark fantasy concept

introduction

tw/cw: blood, body horror, mild suggestive, fucked up morals and content that comes with the dark fantasy genre, dehumanization(?);

isekai modern-reader into 'ye olde darke-medieval-fantasy' but instead of into the body of a human to re-create the industrial revolution. put them into the body of a very cryptid/monstrous version of a vamp

at first mc starts like rlly feral, jumbly-instinct thoughts. but as they begin to drink more blood they get more grounded. so basically hunger = madness or smth.

there's also gamer/leveling up/system adjacent things. but only for mc. where it basically counts how much kills they have and it rewards them with skills and its also kinda like a countdown to how many liters of blood they have left until they go bonkers.

since it's the medieval times, technology ain't that good, or most of anything for that matter. it's bad.

since mc is a spoiled city mouse, they rlly want to have modern commodities that only rich people at this time gets. like frequent baths, good infrastructure and basic plumbing. fancy shit like that.

they kinda get obsessed w/ it since its literally the only thing that's familiar and comforting to them so they try rlly hard to get it. either by killing rich people and stealing their houses or building their own spooky mansion by becoming a noble or smth.

it's kinda like those tropes of rich pretty vampire that gets absolutely monstrous w/o blood. with the bright eyes and growling with sharp teeth.

mc really hates when they get feral cause it makes them feel like a mindless monster, not unlike those that gets killed by hunters and mercenaries. so they cope by being as 'civil/cultured/refined' as possible.

absolutely disgusted at the idea of drinking blood, so they keep gaslighting themself into thinking it's wine. prolly has tarps or smth on their table and fancy glasses.

they often come off as arrogant or stand-offish in the 'don't touch me with ur dirty hands peasant' way, but in reality they're just... a paranoid myso/germaphobe.

they're really fancy, imagine ye stereotypical vamp aesthetic but in sleeping robes. just, like, a really comfortable vampire.

and they have really terrifying non-romanticized features as a nod to the feral-cryptid side they rlly want to hide. like the trope of vampire having tapedum lucidum  or unique teeth marks (y's in leeches or patterns)---

---not those sharp and needle-like teeth for puncture that will leave delicate dot-scarring, perfect for symbiosis, self-control and donations. but textured teeth that's obvious that there's no way to stop the bleeding even if you wanted to, meant for gouging and death. kinda like bullet shrapnel or twisted daggers.

but it won't be complete w/out character interactions.

❤︎ mercenary / monster hunter (placeholder: montague )

>kinda like the witcher or mando at first glance. stoic, gruff guy, very tanky but somehow is very stealthy. has a dog trained to smell blood-trails and harmed prey, it is very rotund 'cause of treats. it's name is whinny (a pun, win, whiny, wine(both the drink and the olde english for friend)) like it's owner, the dog find you sus but later becomes attached to you.

>tendencies probably started out in pity, 'damn is this a baby vamp? hopeless. guess i gotta feed them so they get strong enough to be a honorable adversary'. love a guy with a code of honor but dubious morality. but then he got too into it? he finds the fact that a 'monster' has more of a moral compass than him interesting (ur human kill count being lower, disliking torture, etc) lowkey wants to fix you but in a making you better at murder way.

>has a protective dynamic w/ reader but only later on (monty basically wanted them dead lol), brings them lots of prey to feed on (mostly of the bipedal variety, wink wink nudge nudge), if ya refuse to feed there's definitely going to be some tough-love to encourage a healthy diet.

>can be either romantic or familial dynamic. but there's definitively a touch of fear/intimidation on either party.

❤︎ honored guest / your good friend (placeholder: aldwin )

>is either a himbo or really 'cowardly'. the first guy you ever met that you didn't outright attempt-to or kill. kinda milk-toast at first glance. but the only guy you know can't and won't kill you. you often contemplate turning him into a thrall to keep you company for as long as you 'live', (he isn't that opposed to the idea) but often back out because you still have modern sensibilities, mind control bad.

>you often baby him, both in fear of making him scared of you (the smell is fearousel not actual fear) and also because technically he is one compared to you. that's a grown man, he's not actually scared of your mansion he just wants to be near you 24/7.

>sometimes you use him as a juice box, but only after hosting extravagant dinner parties whenever he visits (which is often, on both), making sure he eats enough to replace the blood and too drunk to feel pain. it was actually his idea, managed to convince himself that the dinner is for replenishing and not because you want to celebrate him. the actual feeding is awkward, you refuse to use your teeth and used one of the dinner knifes.

>friend zone/ one sided. mc is in denial/deeply oblivious. can be read as codependent (emotionally).

❤︎ the scholar / the monster doctor (placeholder: boris )

>doctor/physician guy. he has glasses :), someone who takes ur ideas seriously, sees you as a kindred soul, both in the studies and about your nature. has a whole jekyll and hyde situation, his jobs is kinda the reason why he goes awoo in the night. he's surprisingly very soft? mild mannered, polite, a proper gentleman. (whinny hates him lmao)

>kinda a goldigger, first approached you with the intent of having you sponsor his 'research' (monster biology) but later decided to have a collab w/ you. you still treat him as kinda of a sugarbaby still, reserving a special place in the manor to serve as his lab and giving him lots of artifacts and equipment. you mostly do it to see if he has a cure for vampirism (aside from a very painful death), but it's nice to see a very chivalrous man get flustered when it's him being spoilt.

>the wolf side is the complete opposite of his demeanor, feral, bloodthirsty and animalistic, it attacks and destroys everything in it's wake, it cannot harm you due to your strength, but the intent is obvious. it's a very harrowing affair filled with angst, (except the part where you're prepping for the full moon and needing to chain him with silver), you know what's its like to lose control and hurt someone innocent so you always try to do damage control for his sake.

>kinda puts you in a pedestal, sees you as someone out of his league.

❤︎ the oldest servant / elder-vampire butler  (placeholder: aldair )

>kinda older looking in appearance but still pretty-boy enough(? somehow). you didn't turn him, he came with the mansion. he used to be a thrall to someone else but now he's a under your reign. has beef with everyone except monty (prolly teaming to make you less hopeless), specially hates aldwin. he's less alfred, more sebastian/claude or ron molan(TCF).

> it's not exactly known why he's loyal, considering he wanted to kill his previous sire and you don't treat him any better (by your standards, vampire culture is weird). maybe it was the way you just... 'subdued' it and allowed him the pleasure of killing his torturer? causing some weird begrudging-debt turned devotion, that or the fact that you are not a pureblood---or at least act like one.

> kinda thinks ur a spoiled wimp but still spoils you. way too knowledgeable abt your habits, you stretch out a hand and he's already putting a glass of 'wine' between your fingers. you shift in your seat? he's already getting you a footstool (mostly an unfaithful servant or a prisoner), you accidentally tear out someone's throat? he's already collecting their blood in bottles, cleaning the crime scene and creating your alibi.

> you're deff being primed for something. maybe related to the dozens of bottles (and sacrifices) in your cellar.

[thesharktanksdriver]

Omg I’m having so many thoughts about the newer stuff of one piece.

These are all jumbled thoughts I came up with recently so it’s unstructured and probably doesn’t make any sense but fuck it

Masterlist for Determiation!

Spoilers for egghead

Determination! Y/n and the seraphim’s would be so god damn interesting like yall won’t believe the sheer amount of ideas running through my head.

Like y/n accidentally running into the Seraphim’s in Egghead after getting separated from the straw hats and absolutely going still when they see S-String(I shall call him that since they’d yet to reveal his designation) and absolutely going into a blind haze where they apologize to him not realizing he’s not Doffy (or at least the Doffy that they feel like they failed).

And it’s there that their dragged to meet the other Seraphim’s

Maybe it was programmed into them to find and retrieve y/n, maybe even protect them.

So the young lunarian children linger by y/n’s side and naturally become curious. Because how can they not be? Especially when all their lives so far had been carried out in a lab, born from artificial wombs that fashioned them of DNA stolen from various people and a species long dead and forgotten.

How can they not be curious when this person they were ordered to retrieve and protect knew of who they were cloned of. Knew more about them than they did themselves outside their programming.

So the children ask questions and they learn

Maybe S-Snake asks about her “mother”, being the only girl had always been a bit lonely for her even when her “brothers” had done their best to make sure she knows she’s accepted. So she wonders about Boa, and how she had come from an island full of women. What was that like? Would they still brush her hair like S-Bear does? Or pat her head for doing a good job like S-Shark did?. She asks about if she was as pretty as Boa, if she was good enough for her “mother” if they ever would meet, a bit of insecurity for the first time curling up in her stomach before y/n says that Boa would love her no matter what, accept her no matter what. Because Boa would never turn down a woman in need, let alone a little girl that was imprisoned such as she was. In that sense she finds a comfort in you, especially as you indulge in things her brothers would usually sigh at but agree to anyways. Without a hassle you let her do little shows where she shows off her fire or make small drawings with the limited art supplies they have. When S-Snake draws you with her and the other Seraphim your heart squeezes ever so slightly.

Maybe S-Hawk has y/n teach him the techniques that Mihawk had taught them when on his island. In a sense he’s curious of his “father” but hides it away as he’d rather die than openly admit the gnawing questions in his mind. When y/n lets him use the blade gifted by Mihawk he can’t help but instinctively rub his thumb over the hilt where the greatest swordsman initials lay carved, a smile also instinctively crawling up the clones face. When his “siblings” become too much and he wants peace and quiet y/n lingers by his side, a silent company that he appreciates as memories not of his own of similar occasions plague his mind. He usually doesn’t enjoy these influx of memories but these ones are peaceful, not filled in bloodshed but instead of a small garden full of ripe fruits he doesn’t know the names of as well as the times in which he narrowly helps them escape an accidental death that may or may not leave S-Hawk on his toes and leads to his presence lingering by your side.

S-Shark notices that y/n seems the most comfortable with him though he knows it makes sense since they’re apart of the crew his progenitor joined. He doesn’t know how to feel about Jinbe, but he does retain a certain sense of respect for him even before he learns more about the fishman and how much he fought for his people. Much like the others he has a sense of curiosity of the world but his is specifically towards the sea, moreso a place where gilled people and pretty women with fish tails lived. That placed seemed so different compared to egghead, more lively and colourful in a way he can’t describe. He cherishes those memories no matter how hazy and unfocused they are, so seeing y/n show him the brightly coloured shells and small bits of coral really make his day. S-Shark knows he can’t go in the ocean on account of the green blood he possesses but he can’t help but wonder. Y/n occasionally clings to him in a way that feels natural, and it’s almost second nature that when this happens he lets them do so without complaint.

S-Bear even before using his ability feels pin roll off you in waves he couldn’t quite comprehend, as if your small body similar to their own could not contain the amount of emotional and physical agony, it cracks and spills from the seems of you that have been restitched and reattached like a doll. It’s scary, but somehow the most terrifying thing is that you retain a smile despite it all. It doesn’t affect you outwardly and maybe even inwardly at most times but it’s there and it lingers around you like an ever-present rain cloud about to burst into a storm. It saddens him, and it reminds him of memories of a pink haired girl he cannot place the name of. Too young to experience such heartache and at the same time her eyes are old and withered from everything that had happened. A child who acts older than their real age because they have to, not because they want to.

S-String notices that there’s a certain kind of Resigned sadness and almost a sense of hope with y/n’a eyes, yet they can never look at him fully without flinching. It confuses him, especially since despite that they treat him with such kindness even when he purposefully acts out or teases the others or them. S-String does not get as many memories compared to the others, most of which are locked away and repressed for some reason but what he does somewhat remember from his “father” is blissful moments of childhood with a boy he cannot name and y/n. This leaves him more confused, these were happy memories yet why do they look at him (and by extension his “father” with such sadness?). So at some point he asks And it’s there that S-String comes to dislike the man that made up his genetic makeup. Because for as much as the others got on his nerves sometimes S-Flamingo loved his “family”, loved his “Sister” and “Brothers” more than he’d like to admit. So hearing that the man he was cloned after harmed his family, and harmed the only person in their lives that had shown him and his siblings any sense of normalcy struck him. That man is the reason why they can’t properly look him in the eye both out of fear and a sense of failure, that man is a reason for their overwhelming pain that night even S-Bear cant comprehend, that man is the reason they broke down when they first saw him and kept apologizing for failing him. S-Stribg isn’t sure as to what happened to you and his predecessor but S-String knows you had not failed him nor his siblings, and he has a feeling you hadn’t failed Doflaimgo but rather he failed you.

S-Sand feels towards y/n a more than ordinary sense of curiosity that plagues his mind. Something he feels is a lingering emotion from his progenitor as he quietly watches and listens to you. It’s odd to him the flippant attitude towards death, something he’s pondered about as the dried out bodies of those who tried to enter egghead lay on the ground. He understands that your immortal, death isn’t much of a good deal to you yet you regard it in such a way that it bothers him. Why do you not seem to care when you tell a story of being ripped from limb to limb or left to bleed out. Surely that’s not something that was fun to experience let alone all the other instances in which you’d died via starvation on the sea or dehydration. Those things hurt, and in that regard you must be hurting all the time if not physically then mentally. Because of that like Mihawk he lingers, first due to curiosity and then out of a certain protectiveness that feel much less like programming and real. When on a mission they feel nothing, more in an empty minded state rather than truly conscious. They don’t feel fear let alone worry but for you he does, and he’s slowly seeing the others feel it too.

S-shadow just finds y/n to be cool’s ngl lol (I don’t know much about Moria so I don’t know how to write for him let alone his seraphim)

Maybe at some point y/n promises them that they’ll one day be free of orders that circulate in their heads

Free to use their wings in a real sky that’s not simulated

And maybe the Seraphim feel a spark of something at those words in their souls

The young lunarian children never thought that they had souls, had the to privilege to posses one when they were clones with no free will, remakes of others who were real people and could make decisions themselves.

But suddenly they find the words of a promise resonate within them, staying there in Suddenly full chests that should just have had it echo due to their emptiness. But the promise stays

And they silently dream of that promise

A place where they could be free

A place where they weren’t poked and prodded at

A place where they could call each other by “brother” and “sister” in full confidence

A place where they may choose their own names

A place where they could experience this idea of “family” that they often pondered about from memories not their own

A place where y/n would teach them all they’d need to know about the world before they’d one day take it by storm

A place where they’d make safe for both themselves and the person they found wanting to protect even without the orders issued by the pacifista

[xtarmanderx]

I don’t ever post things like this here because this is primarily my writing side blog, but it feels too important not to say something.

I started writing 9-1-1 fics for the Buddie fandom and for a friend who was near and dear to me. I quickly left the fandom because of the mods for an event that I was participating in and how awful they were to one of my best friends that joined the event with me. That completely killed my desire to interact with the Buddie fandom at all and I don’t know if I will ever finish posting the fic that I poured my heart into for said event. Because that fic is fully done, but those encounters with those fans made me never want to write Buddie again.

And then Tommy Kinard came along.

And holy fuck, I fell in love with him so fast. I immediately rewatched the show after he reappeared in season 7 because I was so fascinated with his character. And then I fell in love with Lou Ferrigno Jr. and began watching S.W.A.T. just to get glimpses of him and I grew to love that show and its characters, too. And I read his interviews and saw how happy he was to be back on the show and it made me happy, too.

Then I saw all the hate and negativity.

It filled me with so much anger and I blocked so many people across so many different forms of social media so I no longer had to see it. All I wanted was to surround myself with positivity.

Because I’ve been that bitch.

There are people no longer in certain fandoms because of me and I’ll never be able to apologize enough for the ways that I hurt them. Sorry will never be enough to mend those bridges that I poured kerosene on.

It’s why I’ve stayed in my corner and all of my fic comments have been generic, which isn’t who I used to be. I used to engage and leave long comments, but honestly I’ve been terrified to try and join any new community. Because I am fucking terrified of reverting back to the person I never want to be again.

My best friend started watching the show again after I went to his house for dinner and had him watch the BuckTommy kiss episode with me. The last five minutes of that episode, I told him to put his phone down and pay full attention and he was completely engaged and was so happy to see another queer couple onscreen. It gave us something else to bond over every week as we would watch and text about what was happening.

Tonight’s text:

This coming from a gay man who does not engage in fandom spaces at all and who felt blindsided, too. Like so many of us did.

I immediately started writing a fix it fic because that’s who I am. I want to write the endings I want to see. And then I stopped writing and sent Lou a message directly because I needed to get something off my chest.

I was raised in a broken home. Raised by racists who belittled me endlessly and have told me within the last couple of years that I am their least favorite child. I am the youngest of 6. That shit was heartbreaking. It’s a wound that will never heal. But why am I bringing it up? Why does that matter?

Because I saw myself in Tommy. I saw a character who represented the worst parts of my youth, who spouted hateful things my parents taught me to say and then spent years having to unlearn those things. Lou talked about his own ideas about Tommy’s past and it struck so close to home for me. Because Tommy showed he was capable of change. And I did, too. It took therapy and years of reflection and being hyperaware now of the shit I say and having to constantly stay on top of my own thoughts and correct them.

I have been dating a woman of color for the last 9.5 years and she’s the love of my life. She has been there through every stumble and stayed even when my passive aggressive inclinations got the better of me. And I saw so much of myself reflected in Tommy Kinard’s character and Lou’s portrayal of him and saw our relationship in Buck and Tommy, too.

Tonight hit me so much harder than expected. And this probably seems like a jumbled mess of thoughts, which it is, but I needed to get some things off my chest and out into the world.

This is not the week that so many of us were expecting. This hurt. We’re allowed to be upset and need time to process. I sure as hell do.

But I do want to say a heartfelt thank you to anyone who has brought joy and friendship to this fandom. The fics that have been written are amazing and the art has been fantastic. I’ve seen some people make lifelong friends in the past few months thanks to this. It sure as hell strengthened some of mine.

So, if you need a friend right now, know that I’m here. I’ve been subdued for a while, but I refuse to lose out on more joy in my life. Not when we all desperately need it. So I’m here for you.

And please remember to be kind. Don’t let anyone take that superpower away from you.