#I have a list of people who should get slimed

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

I think it would go faster if game show rules applied to the situation. Every time they fail the vote, someone gets a big bucket of slice poured on them . No matter what, Kev-Kev gets slimed at random intervals for the entertainment of the nation.

please mentally insert kevin-shmevin’s face into the image below:

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Not A Verstappen: Gridlocked {7}

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x fem!driver!reader x Lando Norris Summary: Your mother finally gets the truth out of you regarding Max. Warnings: 18+ only, swearing, angst WC: 2k F1 Masterlist NAV: Sibling Rivalry One || Two || Three NAV: Gridlocked One || Two || Three || Four || Five || Six || Seven || Eight

The double bed was definitely not made to accommodate three people, even if you were all spooning, so you found yourself sneaking out at sunrise. You hadn’t been able to sleep with the thoughts running through your head, wondering why Max couldn’t have been more like your mother. You weren’t worried about waking Lando as you climbed out from between them, since you didn’t have an air horn on you, but you were careful not to jostle Charles who was a much lighter sleeper.

After changing into a pair of leggings and a sports bra, you found your airpods and shoved the Aura ring back on your finger before taking a lap of the village. You quickly settled into a good pace, feeling the rhythmic slap of your trainers on the pavement and timing your breathing to match. It cleared your mind and gave you a focus on something other than everything else that was happening around you. For those precious minutes you didn’t think about Max.

So far you had managed to avoid talking about him with your mum, though that was mostly thanks to being blindsided by your relationship status - it had been enough to distract her for the rest of the day. You weren’t so sure that luck would last another 24 hours but you would certainly try.

“Just leave her be, she’ll come in when she’s ready.” Your mother had been watching you all morning from her spot on the window seat, a cup of tea in hand. After Charles had woken up he had joined her and watched curiously, wondering why you were in the garden. “Avoiding me,” she said with a knowing smile. “It’s funny that the only times she would willingly do her chores were when she was trying to hide. It was a dead giveaway, but I never said anything. It was just nice to not have to ask her to do them.”

Charles chuckled as you battled to trim the agapanthus with a pair of rusted and blunt shears. “Should I offer to help?”

She wrinkled her nose and shook her head, checking the time on her watch. “She’s nearly done.”

Charles quirked an eyebrow as he looked at the progress that had barely started to make a dent in the long drive.

“Fuck,” you hissed as you the slimy residue that leaked from every cut leaf made your hand slippery and the shears fell from your grasp, narrowly missing your foot. You went to wipe a wayward hair that fell onto your nose but the sun caught the shimmer of slime and you jerked back with a groan, instead trying to blow it out of your face. You grew more irritated as the hair remained where it was tickling your nose and the urge to sneeze built up. “Fuck this shit.”

Abandoning the garden, you marched up the path and kicked your filthy shoes off before storming through the house.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” your mother greeted jovially. “Lovely day for a spot of gardening.”

“I’m calling Mr Newberry,” you grumbled on your way to the bathroom. “He can sort that mess out.”

You felt slightly calmer after washing away the slime and the chlorophyll that stained your fingers green and that feeling only grew when you found Charles waiting with a coffee made just how you liked it. “Busy morning?” he asked after handing over your elixir of life and taking his payment with a quick kiss.

“I’m just trying to help out,” you said with an innocent shrug. “I made a list of things that need fixing around here and if I don’t make the phone calls they will never get done.”

Charles tried to hide his amusement but when you narrowed your eyes at him he couldn’t stop the smile from breaking through. “Your mother knows you so well,” he laughed as he leaned in to whisper, “She knows you are avoiding her.”

“No, she doesn’t.”

“Yes, she does,” he assured you, running his hands along your sides before he kissed your forehead. “Just talk to her, amour.”

A shirtless and sleepy Lando stumbled his way into the room, rubbing his eyes and yawning as he made a beeline for the two of you. You placed your mug on the table before he reached you and let him fall into the middle of the embrace as his eyes fluttered shut again. He must have been burrowed under the blankets because the heat radiating off him was almost hotter than the blistering shower you had taken.

“Why are you awake?” he mumbled against your neck.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“She’s being a coward and avoiding her mum.”

That made Lando battle his exhausted state and force his eyes to open as his forehead crinkled with a frown. “Why?”

“I’m not.”

“Because she wants to know why that person-we-can’t-mention-for-another-eight-days keeps calling her.”

“You can say his name,” you grumbled. “Max Verstappen, World Champion, Number One. Prodigal Son. Cunt.”

Your mother gasped as she entered the room with a fresh brew of tea. “I should wash your mouth out with soap, young lady.”

You winced at the reprimand. “Oops, turns out we can’t say his name.”

“This has gone on long enough, take a seat - family meeting,” she ordered as she pointed to the table. Lando and Charles took a step towards the door but your mum tutted. “You’re a part of this family now too, gentlemen.”

“Should I put a shirt on?” Lando asked as he looked down at himself. “Or shorts?”

“Please don’t.” “Please do.” You spoke at the same time as your mother, both of you sending each other slightly irritated looks. 

“Two Spitfires, Char, there’s two now,” he whispered under his breath as he went to get dressed. He obviously had been in a rush and blindly pulled clothes out because the tense atmosphere wasn’t enough to stop Charles from grinning at the sight of Lando in his Ferrari shirt.

Seated at one end of the table, you faced your mother while your poor boyfriends were the buffer between. Lacing her fingers together, she stared back at you and made that heavy sigh that every parent could which immediately induced waves of guilt. You didn’t even have anything to be guilty over, but it happened anyway.

“What happened with Max?”

You crossed your arms at the direct question. “This is why I don’t bring people home.”

“What happened with Max?”

“Nothing.” You dropped your head to the table with a thud as her penetrating stare became too much to look at.

“What happened with Max?”

“Fucksake,” you groaned as her persistence won over your impatience. “He called you a whore…well technically he called me one too, but it doesn’t matter. He disrespected you, mum, so instead of calling you what he can do is he can take his phone and go fuck himself with it.”

Lando covered his mouth as a quiet squeak slipped out behind his apologetic smile and you reached out with your foot, running it up and down his leg. You felt bad for subjecting him to this drama when he was as introverted as they come - not that anyone would guess after seeing him on tv. Charles seemed to just take everything on the chin and not a lot fazed him at all, but like you he was reaching out to soothe Lando under the table too. 

“I shouldn’t have come, I’m sorry,” you said as you started to push your chair out.

“Wait, please,” your mum asked quietly as her face softened. “He shouldn’t have said that, sweetheart, and I’m sorry that he did. I’m assuming it was after he found out about the three of you?”

You all nodded sullenly and she sighed. “It’s a shock, that’s no excuse, but it was a big shock. Maybe you should talk to him? It’s been a few days, he’s had time to think and reflect. You might be surprised.”

“Have you ever heard Max apologise?” you asked Lando and Charles. Both of their eyebrows furrowed in thought before they shook their heads. “See, Max doesn’t apologise, and I have no interest in hearing anything else from him.”

“As long as you’re doing it for yourself, honey, and not on my behalf. I have been called every name under the sun, but it's water off a duck's back. Don’t miss out on the opportunity to repair the relationship for some vindication for me. He’s your brother and you have missed so much of each other’s life already.” Your mother sighed again as she saw you had heard her words but they hadn’t broken the wall you had built. “Just think about it.”

She rose from the table, walking around it to rest her hand on your shoulder. “Just think about it,” she repeated before she left the room as you sagged in your chair like a puppet whose string had been cut.

Your phone vibrated in your pocket and you pulled it out to see your reflection broken on the screen. It still hadn’t been repaired from the last argument you had with Max when you accidentally cracked it. Perhaps it was a good reminder to keep.

Unlocking the device, you saw the notification from family share - alerting you that your location services were in use. 

“Fucking cunt,” you groaned before hearing your name from the other end of the house. “Sorry! Can I call him a prick?”

Lando laughed and this time Charles joined in as your mother ranted to herself about your language. You couldn’t help that you grew up around mechanics and drivers, they were the most foul mouthed bunch of people. 

Reaching across, Charles took a look at your phone before updating Lando. “He tracked her.”

“What do you want to do?”

Five minutes ago you would have ditched the phone and packed the car. Five minutes ago you might have threatened harassment. Five minutes of talking with your mother changed everything. 

“I don’t know,” you admitted as you dropped your head in your hands until they were pulled away. You could wear a blindfold and still know exactly who was holding your hand, recognising their touch and feel with the familiarity of intimacy. “What do you think I should do?”

“I’m not ready to forgive him for how he spoke to you, amour,” Charles shrugged. “If he was my brother, I honestly don’t know if that would change anything.”

“I’ll follow your lead, baby,” Lando said as he lifted your hand to his lips. “Whatever you decide. What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking you look really good in that shirt,” you said as you looked at Charles for confirmation, his smirk evident. “Really, really good.”

“I always look good. Stay focused.”

“I am focused. I am going to call the gardener, and someone to fix that bloody pavement. Then, maybe, I’ll think about what to do next, it’s not like he’s going to be knocking down the door right this minute.”

Both of them turned to the door expecting to hear it knock and you rolled your eyes. “He’s not the bogeyman. He just likes to think he is.”

You took your phone back and opened the family share app, selecting Max’s phone and watched as it zeroed in on the pin drop. “Shit,” you sighed as the blue dot moved along the street. Leaning back in the chair, you craned your neck to see out the window and caught sight of an Audi SUV pulling in the driveway. “I take that back. Can we run?”

Click here for chapter eight.

[scrubbinn]

Slime HRT Day 1: First Pages

I was told I should write down my experiences in this journal. I'm only really doing this because I was told I didn't have to share my writings with anyone except for emergencies, whatever that means. Today is the first day of my new life, and becoming something not human anymore.

I've seen a lot of social media about species HRT. I think it’s supposed to be “Human Removal Therapy”. There’s a lot of people online bashing it, and I'm sure someone is going to try and ban it eventually, but for right now it's pretty unrestricted. To be honest, I am fascinated by it. Becoming something inhuman seemed so, I don't know, cool I guess, but it felt distant, like it would never happen to me, or I'd be labeled a freak by my friends. It was only until my girlfriend brought it up in a passing conversation that I gained the courage to admit I was curious about it. She said I should go for it. The amount of joy I felt then and there was like a 20 ton weight had just exploded out of my chest, but in a good way! We spent the rest of the night talking about treatments and articles, I never felt so happy except then and there, to be seen like that.

My legs were shaking when I met with that doctor. I was told it was normal to be nervous, but it really felt like I was going to just have a breakdown the entire time we talked. There was a lot of psychological exams and way, WAY too much paperwork that basically said I was sure I would be happy and cool with going through with this process. The doctor was patient at least, though he was rude with how little he tried to hide the boredom of his job. Besides that, there was something about him that just made him feel like this was the last thing he wanted to do, the kind of man who’s a total pushover. We eventually got to the question I was dreading “what was I here for, what am I looking to be?” My voice just suddenly stop working right there. It's so funny how I saw an actual dragon on my way here and somehow my request seemed so much more ridiculous. That stupid doctor kept prying me to just tell him until my frustration surpassed my anxiety, and I was able to blurt out that I wanted to be a slime.

I don't know when or why, but I've always liked the idea of slimes. It's their fluidity I think. Being able to morph myself the way I want whenever I want. I mean, how can I trust I'll be happy with my body shape everyday when I can't even pick a favorite color. I spent so much time writing out my own ideas of how their biology worked, or creating a bunch of slime girls for stories I never finished writing. It took me a while to realize I wanted to be just like them, like how it took me a while to realize I wanted to be a girl too.

I thought I'd get laughed out of his office, I mean I've seen the photos and stories of people on slime HRT but it just felt different, like I was going one step too far, I was probably just super anxious, I felt so relieved when he just showed me a list of slime variants instead of laughing. There were so many different options on the list, slimes made of just gel, sap, wax, and there were so many different colors, but that was the problem, they all felt right, I wanted to be any of them.

It was so selfish to ask, but I needed to know if a slime that could change color was possible, or something that could truly transform into any kind of slime. He asked what I meant, if I was looking into becoming a shapeshifter. I shook my head no and said I wanted something like a chameleon. He took off his glasses and pinched his nose, like the weight of every request he ever had just hit him. We, kind of, argued for a while. Well it was him telling me all the different reasons it wouldn’t work or how some people had set up safe LED strips to become a slime strobe globe of different colors, but for some reason it was the one thing I didn’t want to budge on. The one thing I was certain I wanted was that I wouldn’t be certain about my final choice. I was actually ready to just punch this old man until he suddenly folded to my demands and told me he'd need time to make a new variant for something like that. Something about a membrane and chromatophores I think. He also stated, bluntly, that I still needed to pick the type of slime. Being able to switch from red to blue is one thing but there needs to be a base. 

There were a lot of good options, to the point it took me an hour to go through everything and just think about it. I was probably pushing him a bit too close to his next appointment with how long I was searching through options. It certainly makes me wonder how anyone can just know the answer right away. Eventually I had to settle on one and chose the soap variant. I was told it wasn’t actual soap, but it smelled nice and helped deal with germs. I’m not a germaphobe but I like the idea of smelling nice all the time.

After that, I was told I would be contacted eventually when my medication was ready. The wait could be best be described as brutal. There were a lot of calls I made only for me to be told it wasn’t ready yet. I thought I got scammed, like I went to the wrong place and that quack doctor was just faking everything and I wouldn't ever get to be the real me. The most I got was a message once a month saying the research was going well, if I was lucky. 

It was about a year when I got a call back from him, explaining that my medication was ready. I'll be honest, I thought he wouldn't have ever completed it and just stole $600 out of my bank account for a single appointment. I have it now though, a bottle of gel capsules. They taste awful, like shoving soap into my mouth, which makes sense thinking about it. Apparently I won't need to take my normal hormone medication after a bit. Which is good because it's really expensive to pay for both. I guess that concludes my thoughts on the first day. The doc wants me to keep writing down my physical changes but also that I write down my emotional state as well. I don't really get why that’s so important, but whatever, it’s the least I can do if I finally get to be the slime girl I always wanted to be. I can't wait to see how I turn out.

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Next

Thank you for reading through this story. While I’m sure it’s obvious, this is a story inspired by @ayviedoesthings own Dragon HRT as well as @welldrawnfish Fish HRT. I’ve loved these stories ever since they first came out. But I never felt like I had a story of my own to write until I read @sandyca5tle own slime HRT. Please check out all these people’s stories if you haven’t already, and thank you to sandyca5tle for really lighting the fire in me that made me want to try my hand at this sort of thing. I have plans to continue this for a while, not sure how long it’ll be but I want to be able to write a new segment at least one post every one to two weeks. I hope you enjoyed this, and please let me know if you have any advice on how to improve my writing. Thank you so much for reading all this, seriously, it means the world to me. 

[qstarhalo]

ALRIGHT ALL YOU BBH ENJOYERS! YOU LITTLE GHOSTIES! Here are some lines from when Bad was expressing his anger with Pomme (who was also upset) that I think are very neat because my gosh were those lines so good.

(I tried to get them exact so apologies if some are long or not actually accurate)

"It also highlights the fact that that son of a gun thought that he could take my son? My son Pomme. From me?"

"Does he think he's going to intimidate me by taking my son? This- If anything, this motivates me even more!"

"The ONLY thing I could say is that he is grateful not a hair on Dappers head looks like it was harmed. Because if his hat had been so much as askew, I would have ended his existence right there."

"Quackity was given Pandoras Box, and he made the mistake of opening it."

"There will be blood, Quackity."

"I'm going to find whoever signed off on this, I'm going to find whoever's remotely responsible. Everybody, every single person who was connected with my sons kidnapping, and I will make them all suffer. Every single one, Pomme. Every single person who is remotely connected. I don't care who it is."

"He better hope I don't win the election. Cause if I win, ohhh. Oh my gosh. If I win. Quackity has no idea what he is just put his foot into."

"He stooped to the level of this. Of laying his grimy little mitts on what should not be touched. You do not touch my son. Nobody touches my children. Nobody."

"I'm going to pay him back for it 100 times over. That's always been my philosophy, Pomme. When someone messes with you, you return the favor 100 times over. And you send the message not to mess with you again."

"I'm pretty easy going Pomme. I'm pretty easy going. I don't hold a grudge. I live and let live. I let people do what they want. But the moment you try and touch what's important to me, you've gone too far."

"He hasn't just angered one of us, he's angered all of us."

"Laying his hands on you adorable little eggs is one step too far."

"And now he just stepped on it. He stepped on a landmine and he doesn't even realize it's about to explode under his feet."

"We need to make a list of every. single. person. Every single person we need to do payback against."

"No mercy, no quarter, no pauses, no timeouts, nothing."

"It's just me, and revenge"

"Every single person who was involved. Every single person. I don't care if it's Cucurucho. I don't care if it's ElQuackity, Quackity. I don't care if the code monster is involved. I genuinely don't. I do not care. Because anybody who is willing to do this, who is willing to threaten my boy. The apple of my eye. [...] Anyone willing to do that, willing to take one of my children from me. And use it as, as what? A threat? Leverage? Anyone willing to do that, I don't care who it is. I don't care how long it takes. I don't care if I- I don't care if it takes 100 years, I will hunt you down. And I will end you. I'll make you regret 1,000 times over what you've done. I will make you regret every single thing you did.

"And when you're on your knees, begging for mercy. When you cry out with that last breath and you say please let the tournament end, I will whisper in your ear "no""

""Why is Bad playing the victim?" I'm sorry. I'm sorry that my child was kidnapped and that inconveniences you and makes me quote on quote play the victim."

"He doesn't realize the storm, it's like a storm in a bottle, and he just like threw the bottle on the ground. And now the storm is out."

"But had Dapper been killed, there wouldn't have been forgiveness in that situation. I mean, I would've forgiven Slime eventually after I'd, you know, killed him a bunch. Maybe, had imprisoned him."

"Sale on Hot Topic items, 50% off with the code "BadBoyHalo""

[neonscandal]

explain to me how bakugo is traumatized. the kid he grew up with was nice to him once and he immediately came to the conclusion that he should die. that's not trauma, that's being insane.

I'm going to start with the fact that, justifiably, there's never a reason to tell someone to kill themselves. Additionally, note that me saying Bakugo is traumatized does not mean that Midoriya is also not traumatized.

Regarding your question, the trauma that I mentioned on a recent ask, (I assume this one prompted your question) referenced the following:

Captured by the Slime Villain, effectively bound and suffocated in front of an audience (doesn't include the fall out after being someone who is publicly assaulted)

Muzzled, bound and robbed of autonomy in front of a national audience at the Sports Festival

Kidnapped and bound by the LOV (the forcible binding is recurrent through all the above)

Don't really have to go into the swath of issues he and Class 1A likely can and do develop from being child pawns in a war of adults but that can be applied as well re: survivor's guilt, PTSD, paranoia from the mole, etc. from the PLF arc and up until current manga events (I didn't feel like a spoiler warning).

Things that people don't tend to capture in the box of Bakugo's characterization:

He comes from a verbally and physically abusive household, demonstrably (you can jump down to the second paragraph of Bakugo's Strengths listed here for my thoughts on that impact)

Forced to defend himself against older kids from a young age and possibly on a recurring basis, as referenced in the above image. We could probably chalk the confrontation up to a consequence of his false overconfidence, sure. But does that justify 4th graders ganging up on what looks like a kindergartener/first grader?

As for Bakugo and Midoriya's relationship, we don't have much to go on. We know they were close and amicable as kids, things likely went to shit when Midoriya didn't develop a quirk, there's some beetle excursion in the woods that Bakugo refers back to a lot which is pending further context for readers/viewers, and then there's a fall in the river which really soured relations as Bakugo misinterpreted genuine kindness for condescension (see home life and such above). Again, none of this justifies the bullying we see at the start of the series or the way their interactions have shocking physical components. But what I do find interesting is that I've previously likened Bakugo's disposition to Endeavors but, in retrospect, I think he's a strong parallel for Dabi too.

Dabi's rage stems from being robbed of what he thinks is his inalienable birthright as the oldest son and heir to Endeavor's legacy. He disproportionately targets Shouto as the usurper of what is rightfully his. Dabi's claim, of course, makes more sense from a traditional and, probably, cultural standpoint. But the reason I mention it is that I don't think Bakugo was constantly telling Midoriya to take a swan dive off a roof. It doesn't forgive the bullying but it contextualizes why, that day, the bullying reached a new height when Midoriya was outed for still trying to get into UA. Bakugo saw this as an immediate threat to his position because, even though he didn't admit it at the time, if anyone could get into UA, quirkless or not, Bakugo knew Midoriya could.

Just as Midoriya has always seen Bakugo as being heroic and capable of being number 1, Midoriya proves time and time again that, even without a quirk, he's got the spirit of a hero and is successful in spaces where Bakugo is not. As the story progresses, we see evidence and the ultimate manifestation of Bakugo's remorse through his apology and other ways he's softened up. I'm not saying he wasn't a little shit but that's also not all he was (IDK if you've met kids but... without healthy socialization they can be little emotional terrorists). As things have unfolded, we see that, internally, Bakugo uses thoughts of Midoriya to galvanize his path forward and we've recently confirmed that when Bakugo spoke to Kirishima about strength... he was referring to Midoriya, you can scroll down to paragraphs around the last picture. I'm just gleeful about calling it. But, suffice it to say they've both been looking to one another this whole time.

There are still periphery pieces of their background missing because the story is largely from Midoriya's perspective. I don't think we'll get a comprehensive backstory but I think there will be some sort of meaningful explanation behind the beetle trip that may inform why Bakugo ultimately misinterpreted things so poorly at the river. I mean, maybe it's as simple as the fact that he couldn't fathom kindness because it's something not typically afforded to those who are perceived as strong. I don't know but I look forward to finding out.

[thatonegenshinsimp]

Memories (Diluc x reader NSFW)

No thoughts only Diluc with his lover and how they met each other. Enjoy~

Masterlist

Warnings: NSFW, unprotected sex, missionary (sex position), slight spoilers for the Ballads and Brews event and for Diluc's backstory utc.

NSFW Content below, by scrolling further past this point, you have chosen to read the content below to your own accord.

Notes: I’m more than likely going to make a series out of this for all of the men. I’ll probably make a poll to see who I should write the next one of these for.

Summary: Diluc despises talking or thinking about the Knights of Favonius and anyone who associates with them. However, that completely excludes you, his lover and Varka’s only child. In all fairness, your history with him runs deep, all the way back to when he first started out as Cavalry Captain of the Knights of Favonius.

The first time that Diluc can recall hearing your voice and seeing your face was when Varka introduced the two of you at the party that the Knights of Favonius hosted to celebrate his becoming Cavalry Captain. His father was there with him, a hand on his shoulder as he spoke to him. That was when you walked up, holding a glass of a drink he can’t recall now, but one you liked at the time.

“Congratulations on becoming Cavalry Captain. It’s very difficult for even the senior knights to impress the Grandmaster.” You said, taking a sip of the drink. “Oh, thank you.” He said, causing you to hum softly. “I’m sorry, I don’t recall ever meeting you. Do we know each other?” He asked. You shook your head, smiling softly. You were about to say something when Varka walked up, clapping him on the back. “Diluc, there you are, my boy. Ah, and I see that you’ve met (Y/N) as well.” He said, ruffling his hair and yours. “Is that your name?” He asked, causing you to nod. “I’m their father.” Varka explained, a big grin on his face as he spoke. “Sorry, I was about to say that.” You said, hiding your face in your hands. “There’s no need to be embarrassed, my father is the same way.” He said, patting your shoulder. The two of you talked until the late evening, when Diluc had to return home for the night.

The next memory Diluc remembered clearly was when the two of you were fifteen, and you were in the middle of a commission, dealing with a group of Hilichurls. One of them tried to throw a pyro slime at you, but Diluc jumped in front of you and hit it with his claymore. You turned back and looked at him after dealing with the other Hilichurls, smiling. “Thanks, that might have been bad if it had hit me.” You said, checking off the commission on the list you had. “Alright, one more, and it’s in…” you groaned. “It’s in Dragonspine, lovely.” You sighed deeply, before feeling a hand on your upper back. “Let’s get going then.” You heard Diluc say. “What about you? Aren’t you on patrol?” You asked. He shook his head. “I finished everything I needed to do today early, so I was headed back home for the day, but I don’t mind. Besides, it’s better to go with someone in case one of us needs to get help.” He said, causing you to nod in agreement. “Alright, I’m convinced, come on then.” You said, grabbing his hand and leading him toward the towering mountain.

You’d gotten to the foot of the mountain with him when it got much colder, causing you to shiver. “Are you cold?” He asked, causing you to nod. “Even though I have a jacket on, it’s still pretty cold.” You said, before feeling a sudden warmth wrapped around your shoulders as Diluc guided your arms through the sleeves of his jacket. “Wait,” you said, stopping him, “won’t you be cold, though?” You asked, worried. “I have a Pyro Vision, so my body temperature usually runs warmer than most other people.” He explained, buttoning up the jacket to where you would still be able to move. “Come on, it should be up ahead.” He said. The commission was a simple time trial, and you got your gliders ready and stepped on the pressure plate, triggering the timer to start. You both ran as fast as you could toward the slimes on the way, cutting them down swiftly together. By the time you both got to the bottom of the mountain, you were exhausted, panting softly. “Sorry, I’m a bit out of breath.” You said. “You should get back, it’s getting a bit late.” He said, helping you down the mountain. It was only after he left that you realized that you still had his jacket on. Your father noticed, but he decided against saying anything to spare you the embarrassment.

The next day, you walked to the Dawn Winery to give him back his coat, now smelling of you. Crepus was the one who answered the door, and he invited you in for some tea and something to eat, since it was lunch. You accepted, hanging the coat on the coat rack and taking a seat at the table in the dining room. A few minutes later, Crepus brought out the teapot and poured you a cup of tea, setting it in front of you along with a few various sweets on a plate as well. “They’re from Good Hunter, in case you were curious. Apparently, they have a dessert menu.” He said, taking a sip from his own cup as you put a cube of sugar in your tea and stirred it to mix it. “So, if I may ask, why did you have Diluc’s jacket with you?” He asked, a smug grin on his face as he spoke. “It’s not like how you’re thinking. We went to Dragonspine yesterday, and we got done with the commission pretty late in the evening. It was cold, so he gave me his jacket.” You explained, trying to hide the red that dusted your cheeks as you took a sudden interest in the teacup in front of you. “You know, you may think you’re good at it, but you’re horrifically bad at hiding your feelings about people.” He said, taking another sip. “Gee, thanks.” You said sarcastically. He laughed. “Don’t be embarrassed, it’s perfectly normal to be like this when you catch feelings for someone, take it from someone with experience in that matter.” He said, ruffling your hair and setting down his tea cup. He walked off and went to his office, inviting you to stay for dinner at the winery. You decided to take him up on the offer, and sat in the living area of the winery while waiting for the sun to set. You were drawing in your sketchbook when the front door to the winery opened, revealing Diluc and Kaeya.

Kaeya hung his jacket next to Diluc’s, noticing that it was there almost immediately. “Keep it with you next time, you might just need it.” He said, handing it to Diluc. He noticed you in one of the chairs at the dining table the moment he walked into the dining room. “Oh, (Y/N), what are you doing here?” He asked. “I came here to return your jacket, and your father invited me to stay for dinner.” You explained, fiddling with your shirt sleeve. He nodded, taking a seat across from you. The room was awkwardly silent, and you didn't know what to talk about. Diluc coughed. "So, Weinlesefest is next week, are you also helping to set up for it?" he asked. You were thankful for the opening, and nodded. "Yeah, I help set it up and take it down every year." you said, noticing how the awkward tension still lingered. Diluc tensed up slightly, looking to the side, before remembering something. "Oh, yeah, thanks for returning my coat. I forgot that I gave it to you, and assumed that I just lost it." he said, causing you to nod. You were thankful for the fact that Kaeya came back down the stairs and sat next to Diluc, alleviating some of the tension. "Wow, who died in here? Why are the two of you so tense?" he asked, smiling over at you. "Oh, it's just been a long day and I can't really think of anything to talk about." you said, hiding your face in your hands. Crepus joined the three of you shortly after, sitting beside you. "So, how have you been? It's been a while since I last saw you." he asked, looking over at you. "I've been well, although the preparations on the Knights' part have been unfortunately delayed because of the fact that my father is sick." you said. "Really? I saw him at work today." Diluc said. You looked over at him with wide eyes as your face paled. "Are you ok?" he asked. "He fainted yesterday and he was burning up, there's no way he was at work today." you said. "I can ask if he's alright when I see him for night patrol if you want." he offered. "It's fine, I'm going back after this, anyway, I'll tell him to get some rest when I see him then." you said, pinching the bridge of your nose. "You know he works so hard because he wants to make sure he can keep Mondstadt safe, right?" Crepus asked, causing you to nod. "Yeah, I know. I just wish he'd take care of himself and not go into work while he's sick." you said. "Try telling that to this one." Kaeya said, pointing a thumb at Diluc. You looked over at him. "Ok, that was one time, and I didn't even know if I was sick or if it was just really hot that day." he said. "Yeah, sure, anyways, he had a high fever and he felt light headed for the rest of the week because of that, by the way." Kaeya continued. You were about to say something when Adelinde set the food on the table, nodding before leaving the room once again. The four of you ate in relative silence, with a few words being exchanged between the four of you. You got up and started to take the plate to the kitchen when Crepus asked what you were doing. "Taking my dish to the kitchen to clean it." you said, grabbing your cup and taking it with you. You washed and dried the plate and the cup, setting them beside the sink. You turned around and saw Adelinde, who was staring at you. "What is it? Also do you know where the plates and cups go?" you asked. "Nothing and here, I'll take them." she said, picking them up and putting them away, before looking back at you. "Yeah, you're a good one." she said, smiling softly. "What do you mean by that?" you asked. She shook her head. "You'll just have to find out, won't you?" she said, ushering you back to the table. You sat back down and nodded curtly, suddenly becoming interested in the table. "Well now, Adelinde, thank you, it was wonderful as always, and thanks for getting the dishes." Crepus said, causing her to nod. "Of course." she said, stacking the plates and cups. "Heading out already then?" he asked Diluc, who was buttoning up his jacket. "Yes, I'm walking them back now. I might as well, since my shift starts in about an hour." he said, opening the door.

You both left and walked in relative silence, admiring the scenery of the winery around you. You were confused by Adelinde's words to you earlier in the kitchen, but brushed it off and sighed. You heard noises in the bushes, and instinctively grabbed onto Diluc's arm. He went tense almost immediately, looking down at you as his face heated up. He was never more thankful for the cover of night than he was now. "Did you hear something?" he asked, drawing your attention back to him. You noticed that you were still clinging onto his arm, and immediately let go of him, apologizing. "Sorry, I thought someone was watching us, and when I heard something in the bushes, I just kinda acted on instinct." you mumbled, causing him to chuckle softly. "It's fine, I know you didn't mean to." he said, putting a hand on your shoulder. You sighed, continuing to walk with him until you got to the city gates. The moment you saw Varka, you stormed over to him. "Oh boy, here we go." Diluc muttered under his breath. "Sir Diluc, is everything alright?" Swan asked, looking at him. "Yeah, everything's fine, I'm just watching (Y/N) yell at Grandmaster Varka for not calling out sick today." he said, watching concernedly as you did so. He felt a sort of pang in his chest, and suddenly wished that you would worry about him like that. He shook his head, walking up and telling you goodbye for the evening as he went to get ready for his shift. "And you should- oh, goodnight, Diluc, be safe out there." you said, before going back to speaking to your father. Varka's gaze followed him as he left, before returning to you. "What is it?" you asked, slightly annoyed that he wasn't fully listening to you. "Did Diluc walk you back here?" he asked, his expression one of surprise, before morphing into a smirk. "It's not like that." you said. "And yet something in your tone says that you wish it was." he said, causing your face to redden. "Please stop." you mumbled. "Come on, tell me, what did it for you? Is it the way he treats you? Is it his looks? He is the best bachelor in Mondstadt, you know." he said, elbowing you lightly. Meanwhile, your face kept getting redder and redder. "Stop it." you said, hiding your face in your hands yet again. "Alright, I'll stop, but you should tell him. Like I said, there are plenty who want his hand in marriage, you don't want to lose your chance to tell him because you're nervous." he said, smiling as you nodded. "Wait, I'm not done telling you off. Go home, there's no way you aren't still sick." you scolded, watching as he shrugged his shoulders and nodded, leaving to go home. You, meanwhile, had some emotions and thoughts to sort out with a certain someone the next time you saw him.

When Diluc got home that evening, his father was in his office when he saw him. "Hey, (Y/N) left their sketchbook here. Can you take it back to them tomorrow?" he asked, causing him to nod. "Yeah, I will." he said, his face reddening at the mention of your name. He took the sketchbook and stood there, holding it in his hand and looking at his father. "Is something wrong?" Crepus asked, looking up at him. Diluc shook his head, frowning, before he spoke. "Actually, can I ask you something?" he asked, closing the office door behind him. "Sure, go ahead." he replied, continuing to sign documents. "When you said that you fell first for mother, did you know when it happened? Could you tell that you were in love with her?" Diluc asked, looking at him. Crepus' hand stilled on the paper, and his eyes shot up to look at Diluc. He slowly cleaned his pen and put it away, his owlish gaze locked on him. "You like (Y/N), don't you?" he asked, looking at him. "Yeah, I just didn't really know until now." he confessed, his face flushing at the thought of telling you how he felt. "Have you told them?" Crepus asked. Diluc shook his head vigorously. "I don't know how to tell them. Did you see how I was at dinner? I was an awkward mess. They probably think I'm an idiot." he said, looking at him. Crepus motioned for him to calm down. "Relax, it's ok to be nervous. Do you think I was any different when I told your mother I had feelings for her?" he asked, shaking his head and chuckling softly. He hummed, thinking, before looking back at him. "Well, Weinlesefest is coming up, so why don't you make them dinner? Starsnatch Cliff is a good place to go for a picnic, you know. And it's far away from the city in case things... escalate." he said, watching as Diluc glared at him. He laughed. "Come on, that was funny. Besides, that's where your mother and I went on our first date, and look, we have you and Kaeya now, even if she never got to see Kaeya, but we still had you, didn't we? So I'd say that that date went rather well if she was willing to put up with more dates with me and marriage on top of that." he said, his gaze falling to the ring on his finger that sat behind a diamond encrusted wedding band, the one that Crepus' wife had worn since the moment he put it on her finger, and until the day she died. "Your mother and I were happy together, I want you to feel the same way with whoever you choose to be with that I did with her." he said, looking up at Diluc. Tears stung at the corners of Diluc's eyes, and he nodded wordlessly. Crepus got up and ruffled his hair, before hugging him tightly. "Now then, we should prepare, since setting it all up is going to take some time, something we don't have much of, and you still have to help out with setting up for Weinlesefest with the Knights of Favonius on top of that." he said, causing Diluc to nod. With that, the two started planning what to do when the time came.

Diluc remembered the entirety of that year's Weinlesefest like it was yesterday. You carried a few boxes of supplies to Springvale, putting them down near where the Knights of Favonius were setting up their stall. You turned around and came face to face with Diluc, who was smiling at you. "Are you alright? You seem a bit out of breath." he commented. "Nothing I can't handle. I carry heavy stuff all the time during commissions, I've just been doing it for two and a half hours, and it's starting to take its toll." you said, laughing. Archons, he loved your laugh. The outfit you were wearing complimented your hair and your eyes perfectly, and his gaze couldn't help but linger on you for a minute before he spoke. "I was wondering if maybe, after this, you wanted to join me for dinner. I planned a picnic for me and Kaeya, since we don't really get to see each other that often other than when our shifts end, but he wanted to enjoy the festival, so I have enough food for the both of us." he said, smiling softly. You gave him a smile of your own. "Of course, I would love to." you replied, before going back to helping out with the tent for the stall.

He thought that the time to stop working for the day would never come, and worked rather slowly, but everything was finished by the time the sun had barely started to set. He walked over to you while you were conversing with Varka, clearing his throat. "Hey, are you ready?" he asked, holding out a hand to you. Varka stared over at him, confused, and then looked at you. "He invited me to a picnic at Starsnatch Cliff." you explained quickly, before taking his hand and letting him lead the way.

The sun was just meeting the horizon when the two of you arrived at Starsnatch Cliff, overlooking the Archipelago and the sea. "It's beautiful at this part of the cliffs, I swear it gets prettier every time I see it." you said, gazing out at the ocean. You thought that Diluc was looking at the ocean with you, but when you turned to look at him, you saw a bouquet of Cecilias in his hands. He handed them to you as he spoke. "In all honesty, I was somewhat untruthful when I told you the reason I had enough food for both of us. Kaeya never actually knew I was planning a picnic, I was just looking for an excuse to speak to you alone." he said, his face flushing slightly. "Diluc..." Could this really be happening right now? He wasn't confessing to you, there was no way he was, right? He set the plates down on the blanket and gave you your share of the food. "Why did you want to speak to me alone? We could have talked down there." you said, but he shook his head. "No, we couldn't have. Your father would have interrupted, or mine would've. I wanted this to be special, even if your answer isn't what I hope it is." Diluc took off his gloves and held your hands gently in his own. "I- Archons, where do I even begin?" He smiled softly, sighing. "I don't know how, but I've fallen hopelessly, completely in love with you." he said, kissing your knuckles gently. "I don't really know how to put it into words, but I do know that you're the only one who makes me feel so weightless and happy like this just by being around me. I understand if you don't feel the same, and I will not force you to say that you do, but I wanted you to know how I felt." he said, letting your hands fall back onto your lap. When he looked up at you, he saw that your face was completely red, but you didn't hide it in your hands like you usually did. Instead, you grabbed his hands and interlaced your fingers with his. You got closer to him and pressed your forehead against his, cupping his face in your free hand. "You moron, why didn't you tell me sooner?" you asked, giggling softly. "I only recently realized what exactly it was that I was feeling, to be honest." he replied, wrapping you up in his arms, the food having been long forgotten and cold beside the two of you as he held you in his arms. Your eyes caught the last few rays of sunlight as they faded over the horizon, giving them an enchanting glow of sorts as you spoke.

"Kiss me, Diluc Ragnvindr." you whispered, looking up at him as his eyes went wide. He didn't waste a second, and slowly pressed his lips against yours. Your eyes slipped closed, his doing the same, and you gently held his face in your hands. "And to answer your confession, in case it wasn't clear by now, I love you too, Diluc." you said, leaning in and kissing him again. Needless to say, your and Diluc's absence from the festivities was to be expected, and it wasn't very surprising when Diluc came back at the ungodly hour of midnight and had you with him, asking Crepus if you could stay in the guest room. "Fine, but they stay in that guest room until the sun rises or Kaeya's awake, got it?" he asked, causing your face to redden. "I was going to, but may I ask why you're saying this?" you asked. "You two spent a while up at Starsnatch Cliff." he said, smirking. "Oh, very funny, we didn't do anything like that." you said, crossing your arms. "Just making sure." he said, holding his arms up. You did not, in fact, stay in that guest room, and when Crepus checked early the next morning, he sighed, smiling when he saw you asleep in Diluc's arms. He decided to let the two of you sleep for a little longer, since Diluc didn't have work today, anyway.

Another memory Diluc loved recalling was a few years later, he was just shy of turning eighteen, when he proposed to you. He proposed to you at Starsnatch Cliff, the location of your first date with him and where he had confessed to you years ago. He knew the two of you were still very young then, but he loved you, and you loved him dearly. Of course, Varka had his own qualms about you marrying Diluc, but Crepus eased his worries when he spoke about how you would be welcome to choose to stay in the city or at Dawn Winery, and would still be accepted with open arms in either place, which made him feel better. He agreed on the condition that Diluc promised to protect you, a condition he agreed to immediately. The ceremony was short, but the party at the Angel's Share was quite a long one, filled with drinking and congratulations to Diluc from plenty of his friends and his family. You had agreed to move into the Dawn Winery, something that your father couldn't exactly fault you for, but this time, Adelinde welcomed you to help her with dinner and with cleanup, making your transition to living there smooth. Diluc felt as though things couldn't be any better than they were now.

The next memory Diluc remembered, and the clearest one of them all, was the day Crepus died. You were the first to arrive, having ditched a commission the second one of the Knights told you the news. He remembered you holding him in your arms like he'd break, crying with him as he hid his face in your neck. He remembered you taking his side when Eroch tried to get him to cover up the matter, your rage almost matching his. You refused to help or let any of the other Knights cover up the truth behind Crepus' death. In fact, you told everyone who asked you what actually happened, and although they were confused, the news of Crepus' death and what he did to Ursa the Drake caused quite a bit of unrest and contempt toward the Knights of Favonius, namely, of course, Eroch, for trying to cover the matter up.

It got worse from there, of course it did. Kaeya came to Diluc that evening and told him the truth behind his being in Mondstadt in the first place, and where he was from. You tried to hold him back from hurting him, but Diluc threw you to the ground, and in a moment of desperation to stop Diluc from making an irreversible mistake, a large wave cut between them and knocked them both off of their feet, and they turned to look at you, who now held a glowing Hydro Vision in your hand. "I said cut it out!" you yelled, blocking Diluc's next attack with your sword. You were crying now. You didn't want this, you didn't want things to be like this. You didn't want that unrivaled hatred in his gaze to be directed at you. Without knowing what else to do, you collapsed into a sobbing heap on the muddy ground. Kaeya ran off, leaving you alone with him. Realizing that he almost hurt you, he immediately fell to his knees and wrapped you up in his arms, tears of his own streaking down his face. "I'm so sorry, I didn't... I wasn't going to..." but he didn't know what to say. He could only hold you as you cried, and cried, and cried in his arms.

The next thing he remembered was leaving you to go look for people with answers to where the weapon he used came from. You were begging him not to go, not to leave you, but he'd already made up his mind. Just as he was getting ready to walk out the door, you spun him around, grabbing him by the collar and slamming your lips against his, pouring your emotions into kissing him. You pulled away and sighed, tears welling up in your eyes as you spoke. "Please come back to me. I can't handle losing anyone else, please." you begged, before letting go of his jacket and watching him disappear past Stone Gate. You remember crying until you passed out that night. That, and you remembered the crushing feeling of loneliness that filled your chest and pressed against your lungs, making it hard to breathe sometimes whenever your heart felt particularly heavy at the thought that you may never see him again.

He came back, three long years later, but he wasn't the same as when he left. His body was now littered with scars that traveled up and down his body, but not a single one was on his face, he made sure of that. Eroch had been caught as the mole in the Knights of Favonius, and he had been punished accordingly by Jean. Varka had left on an expedition to Snezhnaya with Seneschal Seamus of the Mondstadt Cathedral and a majority of the Cavalry, too. Kaeya had taken over as Cavalry Captain, despite there being no Cavalry to, you know, captain, but he did make short work of doing the paperwork that came with the position. He held no animosity toward you, and spoke to you the same way he had before. It was Diluc who had changed, and you were worried that he didn't love you anymore. However, he proved it to you the night he returned, he proved that his heart, guarded as it was, belonged to you only.

The next thing Diluc remembered was that night, when you begged him to give you all of him. You didn't hate his flaws, or despise the way he didn't smile or talk as much anymore around everyone else like he used to. No, you loved and embraced him as he was, pulling him closer as your need for him became clear. "Please, it's been so long since I saw you last. Please, prove that it's really you, I'm so tired of my mind playing tricks on me." you whispered, tears rolling down your cheeks as you spoke. You covered your eyes with your forearm, before feeling him pull it away from your face as he kissed you, gently wiping away your tears. "Please," you kept whispering, breathless as he kissed you over, and over, and over again. His lips trailed down to your neck as he gently tugged at the hem of your nightshirt, pulling it over your head and undressing himself. He put his jacket on the coat rack by the door, before unbuttoning his shirt and undoing his pants. He pulled off any clothing he still had on, pulling his unruly red hair out of its ponytail. Diluc then rejoined you under the covers, helping you undress completely. “May I?” He asked, making sure you were comfortable with what he was doing. He didn’t want to end up doing something you didn’t like. You nodded, your face heating up at the gentle tone of his voice. His hands roamed your body, memorizing every curve and edge you had, before his hand dipped down between your legs. He used his fingers, thick and calloused, to stretch you and prepare you to take him. He didn't want to hurt you during your first time with him, after all. He went slow, dragging his tip over your hole before slowly sliding in, his grasp on your hip tightening to the point where you squirmed under his touch. However, you let yourself relax, and let him take over. At this point, you knew you weren't dreaming, only a real person could make you feel as good as he was making you feel that night. His hips jolted slightly against yours as he pushed himself deeper. You whined softly, rocking your hips against his as he bottomed out deep inside of you. “Tell me when I can move.” He said, looking down at you. At this point, you just needed to be close to him. You pulled him down and kissed him, bucking your hips up against his desperately. You tangled your fingers in his unruly red hair, tugging at it as you moaned into the kiss. You held onto him tightly as he started to move, your nails scratching up and down his back, leaving little red lines in their wake. He didn’t care, so long as you stayed just like this with him. He hit deep, his thrusts slow but hard as he looked down at you. He couldn’t even begin to describe how much he’d missed you, but that was nothing compared to how much you must’ve missed him. He pulled his hips back and snapped them against yours, watching as your eyes rolled back a little and you moaned loudly. He pressed his forehead against yours as his thrusts slowly gained rhythm, his hips pistoning against yours as he made you into a mess of moans and whimpers. “Ahhn~ feels s’good, ‘Luc- Mng~ r-right there, please!” You could only tighten your grip on him as he sped up, the knot in his lower abdomen getting tighter and tighter the faster he went. However, he refused to finish first, opting instead to make you feel good. “Are you- Ngh~ are you close?” He asked, gently threading his fingers with yours as you squeezed around him tightly, dragging a low groan from him. “Mhmm~ you feel s’good, I can feel you in my tummy.” You slurred, pushing your hips up against his. He twitched inside of you, feeling your tight walls spasm and clench as you got painfully close to your orgasm. “AHh~ Diluc, m’cumming, cumming- ahHng~!” You wailed his name as you came, before feeling him press his hips up against yours as he came. His big warm hands held your thighs as his cum filled you up in thick spurts of white that made you feel so, so full. You clenched around him, milking him for all he was worth, until he finally stopped moving, and curled his body around yours.

He waited a few minutes before slowly pulling out, watching as his cum dribbled out of you. He could only look at you, picking you up and carrying you to the bathroom to clean you up. “You did so good for me, let me take care of you.” He mumbled, running the water to the bath and getting in with you. He grabbed the soap and lathered it all over his hands, rubbing your sore body and massaging your shoulders. You sighed softly, leaning into his gentle touch as he washed you. He took the shampoo and slowly massaged it into your hair, moving on to do the same to his. He then gently washed it out of your hair and his, before grabbing the conditioner and doing the same. After he was done, Diluc started to get out, and told you to stay in the bath, but you grabbed his arm, your eyes trained on him as you spoke. “Don’t go.” You pleaded, your grip tightening as your gaze grew frantic. You were so scared that he was going to disappear again, that you’d never see him again, but he gently took your hands into his and pressed his forehead against yours. You leaned against him, before hearing him speak. “I’m just going to get some towels, I promise. I’ll come back as soon as I get some towels, ok?” He asked, causing you to slowly let go of his hands as you nodded. He quickly went and got the towels as you curled up and wrapped your arms around your knees. When Diluc got back, you calmed down, and let him pick you up. He wrapped you in one of the soft towels and slowly dried you off, before setting you down in the recliner beside the bed. “I’m going to get some new sheets, I’ll be right back.” He said, getting some new sheets after he tied his towel around his waist. He quickly grabbed a set of sheets and went back to the bedroom, quickly changing them. He then pulled back the covers and set you down under them, getting in the bed with you. “Are you ok? Was I too rough?” He asked, looking down at you. You shook your head. “It was wonderful, and don’t worry about me, I’m ok.” You mumbled, pressing yourself against him and wrapping your arms around his neck. You leaned in close to him and kissed him, feeling his arms around your waist as you pulled away. You were exhausted, and fell asleep soon after. Diluc held you close to him and fell asleep soon after, finally home in your arms.

The most recent memory he recalled was when you and him celebrated Weinlesefest together that fall. You and Adelinde had teamed up and made a ploy to get Kaeya to come over for dinner, since he needed to help Razor, anyway. You gladly invited them in, nodding to the Traveler as they explained the situation after Kaeya had had enough of teasing and taunting Diluc. “We have a barrel specially treated for durability, despite its age. Even a flaming flower couldn't leave a scratch on it if you left it right next to it all day.” You said, looking over at Diluc. “I'll go look for it, then.” He said, disappearing down the hall to the storage room. You turned and looked at Kaeya, opening your arms wide. “Come on, bring it in, it’s been a while.” You said, hugging him tightly. “That it certainly has. How have you been?” He asked, watching as you smiled softly. “I’m just happy that he’s here to stay, although I do wish he’d make an effort to try and get along with you. He may not show it, but he does care about you, Kaeya.” You said, turning to face him. “Well, when he stops being such a stiff all the time, I’ll-” “You also need to make an effort to forgive him for his brash actions that night. You know better than anyone how he gets when he’s angry. Not even I know the full extent of that anger.” You said, sighing deeply. “I also wish he’d spend a little more time with me over the holidays, but he’s so busy all the time, and I don’t have the heart to interrupt him when he’s working.” You said, crestfallen. “If you really care about him, you’ll tell him to rest for a bit. At this rate, he might just work himself to death.” He said, looking at you as your face paled. “I’d prefer it if he were alive and well, instead of meeting the same fate that father met.” He said, watching as you nodded softly. “I’ll tell him then.” You said. Diluc emerged from the wine cellar with a small barrel in his hands, setting it on the counter. "I did some digging, and found this one. Do you think that it's big enough for your friend?" he asked, looking at the Traveler. They nodded, taking the barrel. Diluc's eyes wandered to the clock, where he saw that it was almost seven in the evening. "Oh, it's almost dinnertime, would you care to stay for a meal?" he asked, looking at the Traveler and Paimon. "How time flies, I'll be on my way then." Kaeya said, waving and turning slightly to leave. You shook your head, pinching the bridge of your nose as you muttered a soft "coward" under your breath. Adelinde was the one to stop him. "How did you put it? Right, "taking a trip home is a custom during the festival season, celebrated by all cultures of Teyvat." Since even Master Diluc has risen an offer, are you quite sure you can't stay for dinner?" she asked. Kaeya glanced over at you, who simply smiled at him, nodding softly. However, he was a bit hesitant. "I couldn't possibly. I wouldn't want to trouble you, Adelinde." he said, scratching the back of his head. However, she persisted. "How often is it that I get to indulge you, Master Kaeya? Tea for the Cavalry Captain when you visit for business reasons doesn't count. I only get to spoil you if you let me cook for you." Adelinde said, a warm smile on her face. "Oh, uh..." Kaeya couldn't make a comeback, nor could he particularly disagree with her. She was right, it had been a while since he last visited. Diluc saw the opportunity to get back at him. "What happened to your swagger? Lost for words?" he asked, sarcasm lacing his voice. "Diluc, you..." he sighed. "Surely you wouldn't dream of disappointing Adelinde, would you?" he asked. "It would be fun with you here." the Traveler said. "Very well then, Adelinde, one more set of cutlery, please, if you'd be so kind." he said, causing her to nod.

The meal went smoothly, with you sitting next to Diluc and looking at Kaeya. He kept taunting and teasing Diluc, so you decided to intervene. You all but slammed your palms against the tabletop. "Traveler, have I told you about the time when Kaeya got stuck in the tree in Windrise?" you asked, causing him to stare at you. "(Y/N), I thought-" "Ah, you did think I'd keep it a secret, but since you've told quite a few embarrassing stories about Diluc, I think that one embarrassing story about you is only fair, right?" you asked, causing him to sigh, resting his face in his palms. "And elbows off the table, it's not polite." you scolded, causing him to begrudgingly oblige. You watched his face turn redder and redder as you kept recounting the embarrassing memory for him, while the Traveler and Paimon laughed at the funny story.

Once Kaeya left, and you and Diluc said goodbye to the Traveler and Paimon after dinner, you turned and looked at him. "It's not much, but it is progress." you muttered, causing him to look at you. "What?" he asked, confused. "I said that it's not much, but it's progress. You didn't kick him out when he got here, and you invited him to stay for dinner. You also didn't say that the Winery wasn't his home like the other years, so yeah, it's progress." you said, looking down at your Vision. Diluc noticed where you were looking, and got up before pulling you into a tight hug. You rested your head against his shoulder. Adelinde happened to be walking back out to finish getting the dishes and saw the two of you. "Shall I prepare a second set of sheets for tonight, or did you want to do that?" she asked, giving you a knowing look. You hid your face in your hands as she laughed. "Only kidding, but I should get back home. Good night, Master Diluc, and to you as well, (Y/N)." she said, grabbing her things and leaving for the night. Elzer had left by now, having decided to walk Moco and Hillie back to their homes, which left the two of you alone. "Hey, can I talk to you about something?" you asked, causing him to pull back slightly before nodding. "Sure, what is it?" he asked, a worried look on his face as he spoke. You shook your head, leading him upstairs to your shared bedroom. The two of you got ready for bed in relative silence, with few words being exchanged between the two of you before you both settled down in bed for the night. After you were sure he was comfortable, you spoke. "I know you tend to bury yourself in your work, but you've been pulling all-nighters a lot lately, and I'm starting to get worried about you." you muttered, your eyes meeting his. He looked away. "You shouldn't worry about me." he said, causing you to stare him down. "Diluc, as selfish as I am, I really should." you said. "You're not selfish, what do you mean?" he asked. You kissed him, before pressing your forehead against his. "Oh, but I am. I'm so selfish when it comes to you. Your time, your attention, your love, I'm selfish for those things, and yet I never seem to get them. You're always so busy, and I never really see you anymore, but I wish I did, so yeah, I'm selfish, Diluc. The more you stay away and stay out late and shut yourself away in your office, the more selfish I become." you said, cupping his face in your hands. "There are so many desires I've let go unfulfilled for the past few years because you've been so busy." you whispered, tears welling up in your eyes. "Like what? There's no reason to cry like this." he said, thumbing away your tears gently. He sighed deeply. "I want to know what those desires of yours are, because if I can't even fulfill those desires, then what's to say that I will ever be able to in the future?" he asked, an encouraging smile on his face as he looked down at you. You took a deep breath, letting your mind wander as you spoke.

"I want to travel all over Teyvat with you. I want to see the Seven Nations in their entirety, excluding Snezhnaya, of course, with you. I want to see the Thunder Sakura trees in Inazuma with you, and I want to go to the deserts of Sumeru and look at the ancient ruins there with you. I want to see the festivals each and every nation celebrates outside of just Mondstadt and Liyue, and I want to see them with you. I want to see the tall cliffs of The Chasm, and I want to see every mountain in Liyue with you. I want to see Watatsumi Island in Inazuma, and the Avidya Forest in Sumeru, but not if I'm not there with you." you said, leaning against him. "Is there anything else?" he asked, looking down at you as tears started welling up in his eyes. "When we finally stop traveling Teyvat, I want to come back here and stay for good. I want us to start a family of our own and have children of our own, regardless of whether they're adopted or ours. I want to watch them grow up and then spend the rest of my life with you here when they move away and go on their own adventures. I want to do it all with you." you whispered, looking up at him with so much love and adoration that it almost made him breathless. "I love you so very much, Diluc Ragnvindr, and I'm so selfish when it comes to you. I know those adventures will take us who knows where and Celestia knows how long, but I want so badly to see those places with you instead of reading about them in a book while I wait for you alone at night. It's so dreadfully lonely without you here by my side, and I love you so much." you said. When he didn't say anything, you thought he wasn't really listening, but the moment he leaned closer and spoke, you knew he heard you. "Then why don't we start planning those adventures this week? You've been there for me for years, even when I wasn't there for you when I should've been. I want to make it up to you, even if I have to spend the rest of my life doing so. I love you too much to put it into words and have them do my feelings justice, but you've always been so patient with me. You didn't hate me or resent me when I left you here alone to go find answers about a weapon that I should have known more about in the first place. You've been patient with me every day whenever I've had a long day and want to be alone, despite what you just told me. You're not the selfish one, I am." he said, causing you to smile softly. "Then why don't we be selfish for one another together?" you asked, causing him to nod. "I think I know what Adelinde meant when she said that I was a good one." you said, looking down into his crimson eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked. "When she said I was a good one that night your father invited me to stay for dinner, when I returned your coat after you left it with me. She said as I was putting my plate in the sink that I was a good one. I didn't know what that meant then, but I do now." you said, looking at him. "What did she mean?" he asked, already knowing the answer. "She knew I was in love with you then, but she chose to keep it mostly to herself." you said, pinning him down by his wrists. "Oh, speaking of returning things, I never gave you this back, mainly because I forgot, but also because I didn't know that I was your source of inspiration most of the time." he said, pushing himself up onto his forearms and holding you as he rummaged through his nightstand drawer. His hand met leather and he knew what it was before he pulled it out of the drawer. He handed you your sketchbook, smiling as you looked over your old drawings of him. "They look almost nothing like my style now." you said, causing him to chuckle softly. "That just means your style has improved." you heard him say. "Yeah, it has." you smiled fondly at the drawings, before looking back and kissing him. "I meant those things I said earlier, by the way. I want to start those travels as far away from here as possible, so that we can end up right back where we started." you said, letting his hands gently grasp yours. "Inazuma then?" he asked, causing you to nod.

The two of you talked until the moon hung in the middle of the night sky, signaling that it was midnight. You, however, didn't care how late it was, and talked until your sentences were slurred by drowsiness. You fell asleep against his chest as he gazed down at you, a smile on his face as he felt true peace for the first time in what felt like a long, long time.

No matter where these adventures would take the two of you, home for you both was in each other's arms, and neither of you would have it any other way.

[razorblade180]

The Abyss Run

[Musk Reef]

Kirara: Special Delivery! Who ordered the First Aid K- OH MY GOODNESS!

It wasn’t often Kirara found herself completely caught off guard; especially with these particular kinds of deliveries within her friend group. She couldn’t remember the last time she was asked to help with an Abyss domains. However, there certainly wasn’t this many people injured or even requested!

No matter where she looked, someone was in sight. Aether was bandaged up and sitting near the portal while the rest of his friends weren’t any better or enthusiastic.

Keqing, Raiden, Hu Tao, Yelan, Zhongli, Yoimiya, Wanderer, Mona, Kazuha, to the likes of Chevruse, Bennett, Navia, Xiangling, Xingqui, Furina, Noelle, and more! So many friends sulking and bruised up to varying degrees. Even the Kamisato siblings!

Kirara:What the heck is happening!?

Everyone:Suffering.

Kirara:You can’t beat it?

Faruzan:Beating a few monsters isn’t the issue. It’s just…

Collei:There’s so many, and so little time. It’s so daunting!

Nilou:*laying down* Not mention oddly paced. Specifically, floor twelve, chamber one.

Just uttering that made everyone grunt. Was giving up an option? Definitely. Aether wasn’t holding anyone hostage and he actively ran in himself to conquer the beast. This wasn’t the first time gaining every star was impossible, but this should be possible. Many among them were truly strong and have tested their teams in many trials. It was obvious when a challenge felt out of their depth, but this felt fundamentally cruel.

Yoimiya:Guys, I’m sorry I’m not cutting it this time. I’m just too slow.

Hu Tao:If you’re slow then I’m a snail with no slime. We can do a lot together but it it’s enough! Why are things appearing in intervals!?

Ei:It certainly doesn’t make things easy. Raw power does little here.

Baizhu:But consistency still needs it or it’s pointless as well.

Kirara:What’s the troubling part?

Aether:Multiple waves, but they’re spread out. Mechs, emerites that tame beasts, but the bigger issue is the other side which Pyro mages into Lectors and then Serpent Knights.

Sucrose:Just when you counter one thing, it’s at potential expense of another. Time, power and safety being the big thing. The issue is only made worse with the blatant demand for hydro.

Furina:*mumbles* Where’s Neuvillette when you need him?

Aether:Hey! We don’t dwell on decisions not made. We’re strong; I know this. Also that’s rude to say in front of Ayato.

Ayato:I can acknowledge that man’s strength. I’m more concerned about others who might feel a little more discouraged, given other people who aren’t here to help.

Yoi and Hu Tao: We are fine.

Xiangling:I’m kinda not. I really thought I could pull through.

Lyney:Even Father wouldn’t scoff at this challenge. You’re doing fine.

Tighnari:And Al Haitham has his own faults. He’s not exactly made for the second half, and we’re not slow on the first half either. This is a team problem that only gets solved together.

Shenhe:Sorry I’m not more helpful.

Ayaka:You’re perfectly fine. Some battles are worse than others.

Navia:I’m sorry your first Abyss has such a dreadful atmosphere.

Clorinde:It’s perfectly alright. If anything, a shared struggle makes it easier to know everyone faster. Despite the outcome, it’s been nice.

Yao yao: *passing out food* We feel the same!

Wanderer:*mumbles* Don’t be so sure.

Sethos:Be nice. We need the positivity while others are hard at work.

Scaramouche looks over to the left, along with a few other people, watching Keqing, Kokomi, and Nahida looking at a list of failed combinations, time markers, and allies. Honestly if people did want to leave, those three were holding enough determination to make people power through. Those three, Nilou, and Clorinde had the most bandages by far from constant runs, but were pretty good thanks to multiple healers.

Aether:Any luck? We could call it a d-

KNK: Hold on!

Aether:*smiles* I tried.

Keqing:Nahida, do you have any unconventional wisdom left?

Nahida:Honestly….I don’t like to admit it but I think at this point it really comes down to effort.

Kokomi:I’m inclined to agree. Several of these plans are genuinely solid, and I do believe many of us here have the strength and synergy. Our missing speed may come down to a little luck and repetition.

Nilou:….*sits up* Put me back in. In a broad sense, it’s no different than practicing a dance routine in terms or repetition. I feel like can take on the first half pretty well. Although that leaves less hydro for the Lectors.

Clorinde:…I’ll fight them. Electro is the next best thing. Also if I’m confident in anything, it’s my speed. Give me a bit of wiggle room and I’ll make the most of it.

Mona: Well if those two are going to lead, then all that’s left is to decide the teams and try our best. So, who’s going?

xxxxx

[Floor 12-1, two hours later]

If visions were given to those with ambition, then Nahida wondered if a person could be so ambitious that they gained multiple. If that were the case, she was certain she’d find out at any moment. For someone of his health, Dr. Baizhu was incredibly stubborn; his glasses were discarded as he took a rest to her left. On Nahida’s right, Furina had long since tossed her hat aside, letting her hair run wild. Both of them had fresh bruises and sweat but seemed motivated all the same.

Then, there was Nilou. Unlike the other two, she chose to stand near the challenge sigil. She had discarded her headdress and hour in and naturally had the most bruises. Still, she calmly took deep breaths to steady herself and remained focused.

Nilou:Is everyone ready? At this point I think it’s safe to say muscle memory is on our side.

Nahida:You may be right, but….

Furina:You need a bigger break than all of us! As a fellow performer, I’m well aware that a supporting role is at times the most harsh.

Baizhu:I agree. You really should sit awhile.

Nilou:It’s okay. I’m used to long hours practicing, and it’s cooler in here than in the desert. Also if I’m being completely honest…I might not want to stand up again if I sit down.

NFB: (More like she won’t be able to)

Furina:Very well. The show must go on. *stands*

Nilou:Alright everyone. Just like we’ve rehearsed. Lesser Lord Kusanali, Dr.Baizhu, the lead is yours. Lady Furina-

Furina:I’ll match the rhythm. Also for crying out loud *smiles* just call me Furina. The rest of my friends do.

Nilou gave a tender smile and nodded before focusing on the task ahead. She took one final deep breath as everyone got in position behind her. Once again, Nilou sprinted forward. The moment she activated the trail, she went straight into her sword dance and conjuring rings of water with a leap that landed her in front of the primal constructs; she paid them no mind as they were quickly marked by her god and assaulted by Furina’s honored guest while a shield protected her from bloom explosions.

Nilou completely to the other side, leaving the enemies to Nahida while Furina and Baizhu also ran. A Ruin Guard appeared right on time and was immediately marked. A sanctuary from Nahida dawned the arena as Furina gave her blessings. Baizhu constantly pressured the mech alongside Nilou’s dance. With another leap, she flew towards the right and landed with a big splash as two Ruin Drakes rampaged.

Thank goodness for Baizhu’s shield for cushioning violent swings. Nilou too her fleeting seconds of rest as her three friends converged to her spot to actively face the bots, attempting to keep them close by so the constant bombardment of cores could do their job. This was always the worst part.

Nilou began to dance once more and at the moment of the robots’ end, she once again ran to the other side first. Nahida and the honor guests were right behind her. They wasted no time attacking the Emerites on sight, marking them and their summons as the foes circled them in the chaos of dendro. Sanctuaries were fortified, shields, blessings, and attacks were constant from all angles, but Nilou paid it not mind. The clambering of noise would not distract her from making it perfectly between all obstacles and sending out one final wave that drowned out all noise, reducing everything to silence. All that remained was the sound of her own panting, her head held down as she remained in the pose that ended it all.

Nahida and Baizhu: (Stamina or not, she’s clearly exhausted.)

Furina:Hey, are you-

Nilou:T-The time? How much time did we use?

xxxxxxxx

Clorinde:One minute a four seconds. They shaved off five seconds.

Kokomi:Do you think that’s enough?

Clorinde:I can’t say for certain, but I refuse to let such efforts go to waste so easily.

Being a leader wasn’t particularly new for Clorinde, but she had to admit today had been like no other and her partners were no small part in that. Although she was rookie in this case, she’s never been a stranger to long hunts or tests of endurance. Still, this entire situation was enough to mess up her hair and toss even her precious hat aside. The only reason she wasn’t completely drenched in sweat was ironically due to the pyro enemies reducing even sweat into nothingness.

Kazuha and Kokomi were a bit singed, but despite the numerous attempts, they both sat down in relative comfort. Not all that surprising for two people accustomed to war. What really surprised Clorinde was how a young lady from the land of freedom was currently stretching out her limbs and was just as, if not more comfortable.

Fischl’s clothes were scrapped up and her interesting speech patterns had been dropped about an hour into this battle. Clorinde had to give the adventurer credit. Fischl remained the same aside from those two facts.

Clorinde:You’re really used to this, aren’t you? I admit I had a few worries in the beginning but they were clearly not necessary.

Fischl:Surprised are you? It’s only natural. I may not look like, but I’m one of the few people who could tell you about every single challenging trial Aether has tried to overcome.

Clorinde:Ah, so you’re veteran among veterans. I’m honored.

Fischl:Hehe, it just worked out that way. I could tell you crazy stories about the chaos Keqing and I faced in a mysterious domain, or even tales of a very ferocious wolf. This isn’t my first time facing an impossible task. You’d be surprised just how possible they turn out in the end.

Kazuha:Best to take her word on it. The Prinzessin has an intuition about these things.

Fischl:Naturally!

Kazuha:Also we have a war strategist.

Fischl:That too!

Kokomi:March full speed ahead until the very end. Kazuha and I will make sure you won’t miss a step.

Clorinde:Then I suppose there’s nothing left to be said.

They all rise up and space out. Kokomi stands facing the center while Clorinde and Fischl are on the right and left of the area a little closer. Kazuha runs right up the middle and activates the challenge, immediately jumping high into the air to drag the samachulr into a madness of high speed bullets, blasts, and water.

Back and forth, Clorinde teamed up with Oz to shred through the abyss mage shields and take the fight head on. The final blow came when Fischl took flight, cutting through the enemy and soaring alongside Kazuha to the Pyro Lectors. The beasts had no time to react as Kokomi placed her familiar and Kazuha pulled them into a storm of hydro before taking into the sky again for Clorinde to come rushing through with more bullets with Oz matching her rapid fire in the electro charged maelstrom.

With the Lectors thoroughly enraged and three teammates close by, Kokomi rushed in and dawned her garb to keep the hydro pressure strong as pyro energy festered and exploded outwards to manifest shields and caused harm. Kazuha swooped up Fischl to a safer distance as Fire rained down and their teammates, including Oz, got busy vaporizing and overloading every move made against them at breakneck speed. Through burns and blistering heat, they silenced their adversaries and looked to their friends.

Fischl was already soaring right into the two Serpent nights with an immediate follow up from Kazuha with an electro maelstrom. A knight went to strike while another tried gaining distance, but the boy quickly took Fischl’s hand again and leaped up to pull them into the eye of the storm where Kokomi’s familiar appeared once more alongside Oz to set the stage for Clorinde to come barreling in with bullets.

It was as if she was trying to cut through the storm itself. In all honesty, it was a testament to her accuracy that Clorinde never ran into them, because half the time they weren’t looking at her! Kazuha came down with a slash to keep the knights in place while Fischl applied pressure to help their speedy friend wrap things up even faster. Back and forth, bullets and blade, Clorinde the pace and pushed her limits with one final slash that cut through both opponents and sent her tumbling onto her knees. The hunter whipped her head around with little breath in her lungs and stared at her team.

Clorinde:TIME!?

Cleared! Time Remaining: 7:01

Nobody said a single word. Just a wave of adrenaline and exhaustion crashing into them at once. Kazuha sighed while Kokomi fell to knees and Fischl’s eyes grew wide alongside Clorinde.

Meanwhile, on the other side, Nilou finally fell right onto her back alongside Baizhu. Nahida couldn’t believe her own eyes while Furina felt like crying herself out. Though separated by chambers, somehow, deep down, everyone managed to scream at the same time in triumphant victory.

Outside, the others watched the 36th star appear and had their own battle cry. It wasn’t a pretty run by any means. But hey, it was worth the get together and team building.

Keqing:So, when are you going to tell them about the new domain you found?

Aether:Let’s not ruin this moment.

[sandyca5tle]

Slime HRT - Introduction and initial appointment

So, I've been inspired by @/ayviedoesthings (idk etiquette around tagging people you don't know, so gonna avoid the notif for now) 's dragon hrt, alongside all the other ones (bat hrt, dog hrt, and fish hrt) to try my own.

Unfortunately, I'm not much of an artist, so I can't really do a comic like they all have, so I decided to do a written diary instead. This is the first time I've done writing like this, let along putting it out publicly, so constructive critisim is appreciated, but don't be a dick. That being said, on with the show. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, this is the first entry of this diary kind of thing; I've decided to keep this, both since I’ve seen other people doing the same, and because I didn’t do it the first time ‘round and kind of regret that.

Anyway, today I went to the clinic that people have been talking about, the one that I’d heard was handing out non-human/species versions of hrt. It had piqued my interest at first, but I hadn’t been certain, partially believing it might be a joke or a prank or something, but then more and more people began to talk about their own transitions, so I began to research it for myself, eventually working up the courage to seek out my own. When I reached the clinic I was a typical mixture of nervous and excited, and was running what I needed to say through my head a thousand times, to make sure I got it right, while I waited for them to call me.

My  nervousness partially stemmed from the unusual nature of what I was going to ask for. I’d seen people posting about fish hrt, dog hrt, bat hrt, and even dragon hrt, but what I was going to be asking for was even more outlandish.

When one of the staff came to get me, they led me to a room with the name ‘Dr Hans Erian’ on it, and told me to go inside. 

My first thought, as soon as I saw the doctor, was that he looked like an evil mad scientist who had turned good - and honestly, given the magic he was working, he might well have been, assuming it wasn’t actually magic. We greeted one another, and he invited me to sit down across from him at the desk he was behind and we began to talk.

Naturally, he asked me what kind of non-human hrt I wanted, exasperatedly listing off a few standard options, a few of which I'd heard of before. Once he had finished, I told him that I wanted to get ‘shapeshifter hrt’. 

See, while I had been looking online, I had come across so many cool, different kinds of animals and creatures people were turning into that I couldn’t pick just one, so I was hoping that I’d be able to get a hrt that let me any I wanted.

The doctor’s response wasn’t positive, as he swiftly told me that I would not be able to take the medication. My heart dropped when he said that, and I had to fight back my emotions from showing; I had seen so many amazing stories online, and I had been so hopeful despite what I knew was an extreme ask, but it still hurt to hear it was impossible.

I should, however, have waited for the doctor to finish his sentence (although in my defence, he paused at a very bad time) as he went on to say that ‘shapeshifter’, or ‘polymorph’ as it was properly called, hrt was more like an additional medication taken with a non-human treatment after a period, akin to progesterone in feminising hrt.

This renewed my excitement, it was possible, I’d just need to become something else first, then I could become a polymorph from there. Also, I really like the term ‘polymorph’; it felt right. He went on to explain that the polymorph treatment needed a base species, one already predisposed to shapeshifting, so that the polymorph treatment would take. The doctor laid out some options, explaining that they were the best options to work as a base if I wanted the shapeshifting treatment later. There were many cool and interesting options, but the two that stood out most were dragon and slime.

Now I’d seen an example of dragon hrt, and while there were definitely many features I liked from it, the end result wasn’t quite up my street. Slime HRT meanwhile was something I hadn’t really seen before, and the idea of being goopy and fluid sounded very appealing, and seemed like a very malleable base for shapeshifting later on, so I decided on that.

He then pulled out another list, detailing the variety of slime hrt’s that existed, and again, I went through the list and selected the one that most appealed to me - a slime made of sap, liking the idea of being somewhat plant-y, and I even asked if that would mean I’d be able to photosynthesize, the returned ‘yes’ making me even more certain in my decision.

The doctor then pulled out some forms, explaining that while originally there was a requirement for you to live socially as your preferred species for 48 months, but due to demand, and many people pointing out the impossibility for some people to do so, (and I swear I heard him mutter something about too many people kicking his door open), that the clinic had moved to an informed consent model. He slid the forms over and I quickly, but thoroughly read through them, before signing off and sliding them back to him.

While I was reading the forms, I noted some of the ‘side effects’ with a small chuckle to myself - ‘Dissolution of bones’ and ‘Loss of skin and organs’ would have sounded a lot worse on any other kind of medication, but given what this was going to turn me into, those were to be expected, and frankly wanted.

I also noted that the hormones I would be receiving would be administered in gel form, which made sense given I was basically going to become like gel, however, it did prompt me to enquire about how this hrt would mesh with the normal, gender, hrt I was already taking, especially given I was taking that as a gel as well. Fortunately, the doctor explained that I could keep taking both together safely for the first few months, but once the treatment had converted half of my body I could stop, given that at that point my physiology would be changing too much for the human hormones to continue to have much of an effect.

After I had signed the forms, it didn’t take long for the doctor to write up the prescription, and to send me off to get the medicine I’d need. As I’m writing this I’ve just taken my first dose, and looking forward to updating when there is next some developments! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed! Next

[akiwitch]

Favorite Character Poll

Thanks for the tag, @emrowene this looks so fun! (I am a Leandros fan he’s so sad lol)

Rules: list all your main ocs and give brief descriptions of them. then, create a poll with their names and allow your followers to vote on who their favorite character is.

I’m doing the four introduced characters from Thief and Guard!

Stefan

The only leaftail in a legendary group of thieves known only as magpies, Stefan is the first person who has ever broke into the highly guarded Vault of Magical Artifacts and the self-proclaimed greatest thief in the world. After stealing a magical key and then nearly being killed by the client who asked for it, he begrudgingly agrees to temporarily team up with the now former captain of the guard to get it back.

Very temporarily, if he has any say in it.

Stefan is snarky and puts on an easy going attitude, but he’s an incredibly anxious and guarded person. He’s hiding a big secret. He insists he only cares about himself and making enough money to pay off his debts to the magpies so he can retire, but he is lying to himself.

Henrik

Henrik fought for his position as captain of the guard at the Vault, only for all of that hard work to be dashed as soon as Stefan broke in. He goes to hunt down the thief himself, but ends up saving his life. With no key to return and Stefan having enough insider knowledge, he knows it looks like they were working together, and decides they should do that to get the key back.

He has lived an incredible life, from being raised in the nomadic northern tribes following beasties (big owls with antlers I’m not good at naming things) on their migratory path, half raised by the leaftails in the area, and slowly making his way to the vault. Most of his past is shrouded in mystery, but he was on a ship once and insists a little too quickly that it wasn’t a pirate ship.

He’s blunt and straight forward. He doesn’t take crap from anyone, especially not Stefan. He does not negotiate with anyone and has an incredibly strong moral compass. Those morals do not always line up with the law.

Jayda

Jayda studied at several libraries and academies, trying to unravel the mysteries of the Rift through ancient magical relics. This is where she met her husband, Conner.

But the academic life was slow and boring, and she could never push it as hard as she wanted to, so she left to become a relic hunter. But being the smartest person in the room and her wealth of knowledge on magic and relics led to her being stuck in the outlaw city of Dracove, her slime pet Beans being held by the Erling of the city as a hostage. She enlists the help of Stefan in exchange for information on the key and the ritual it is a part of.

Jayda is impulsive and underestimates other people often enough that it’s become a problem. She’s incredibly intelligent, but sometimes lacks common sense. Or tact.

Conner

(His pic is at the bottom tumblr messed up this post so bad lol)

Wife guy.

Conner followed Jayda when she left the academies, becoming a relic hunter with her. He loves his wife. He loves their slime child.

He’s also very smart and curbs Jayda’s worst tendencies.

Conner is the calmer, more level headed of the two of them. He’s often dragging Jayda out of situations and doing any negotiating. He has an amazing memory. He probably would have been a professor if he hadn’t run off with his wife, but he regrets nothing.

And now to tag people! I tag @koala2all @kimurasato @your-absent-father @olive-riggzey @salmonandfox @ashen-crest @albatris @caxycreations and anyone else who wants to!

[calliecwrites]

Tentacle Monster

What is it with people and tentacles? Either they love them or hate them, but they’ve always got an opinion. The older I get, the harder it is staying in human form all day, and, frankly, I don’t see why I should have to. Tentacles are useful! Look how many things I can hold at once! More than you humans with your silly little hands. I can drive this bus and write and knit all at the same time! I can multitask like you wouldn’t believe!

What? An old demon like me needs a job too, you know. Or two, or three. With Satan dead and Hell ‘liberated’, there isn’t much work of the traditional kind going around, if you know what I mean. I’m down on my luck and stuck in the same mess you humans are.

Actually, I have it worse. Rent is a nightmare. You wouldn’t believe how much more I have to pay – oh, they say it’s to cover the cost of cleaning all the slime when I move out, but I tell you, it’s discrimination, plain and simple. Slime? That’s not slime, it’s a highly-developed immunological fluid that kills 99.999% of all bacteria and keeps minor spiritual ailments away. They should be paying me for that stuff! I’d tear out their souls and roast them alive if that… was still a thing I could do. Oh for the good old days, when being a demon meant something.

So here I am, driving this wreck of a bus, in this rotten neighbourhood, for barely enough to live. Half the people who see me in my true form run away, and the other half want to do weird things to me that no demon should ever have to think about. Tentacles aren’t weird – humans are weird. I just have to bear it and grin, with all of my mouths, and keep my tentacles to myself. For all the talk of liberating our Hell, humans have done a pretty good job of creating their own.

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added):

@leahnardo-da-veggie @sandyca5tle @scrubbinn

[erstwhilesparrow]

sparrow's june-nov 2024 (subset of) mcyt fic rec list

i'm in the mood to make a fic recs list. let's have a fic recs list. this is pulled entirely from my bookmarks covering the last six months, and features empires, life series, hermitcraft, and dsmp. not in that order. i've done my best not to repeat authors within the list, and also i've done my best not to repeat works that have appeared in my other fic rec lists, but you should absolutely check out the other works of anyone who catches your eye!!

(as always, if you are on this list and you do not want to be, please let me know and i will remove you!)

DSMP

tune; small_lizard - Quackity/Sapnap/Karl, 3.8k oneshot. Quackity and bodies and trauma. A series of glimpses into Quackity's life with his fiances. Deeply, wonderfully heartbreaking. Trying to navigate life with other people, without ever really having the words to address how or why the navigation does or doesn't work. Hurts without ever needing to explain to you directly the hurt, and this too is about trauma. Very impressively done!

you may encounter the body; cryptofhoney (braveyoungcowboys) - L'Manberg prose poem, 1.1k words. A meditation on graves and ghosts and places and bodies, as conducted by L'Manberg. The first time I read this I could think of nothing to say except the lines of the fic itself again, because they are so lovely and so wonderfully-constructed. Will make you so so sad about histories and locations and graves. Also, cryptofhoney has a ton of really banger DSMP art/fic/poetry; highly recommend looking around!

Breccia; WheelCoveredInEyes - Quackity-centric, 2.5k oneshot. Foolish and Quackity train the slime army. Making a brand new kind of guy, ft. easter eggs from a wide range of excellent writers' words. A thing I love about WheelCoveredInEyes's work is the sense of... clear-eyed hope and care like a layer of bedrock. It is fundamental and inescapable and lovely and tender and deeply attentive to the particulars of a character's situation at the same time. I did not cover Homestuck or QSMP in this rec list, as those are not fandoms I am in, but holy shit can I vouch for WheelCoveredInEyes's other DSMP fic, Homestuck fic, and QSMP fic for these vibes. Brilliant stuff.

toxic clear down to the bedrock; mouseunderthemountain - Niki-centric, 2.1k oneshot. L'Manberg is in Niki's leg. She does what she can to manage, as everyone and everything drifts apart. This one's just truly so beautiful. The blurring of body and location and self, but also the specificity of what it's like to live in and with this place, after everything that's happened, what it's like to be in Niki's body. I described this fic once as feeling like it refuses to reveal all of itself to me at once; it's just going to tell me things that are true, and it's gonna hurt.

Empires SMP

Gem Dreams of Wizardry; changeableLandscape - E1 Gem character study, 8.9k oneshot. Covers the early days of Gem's Empires S1 POV. Honestly, I thought about making a rec list way back in like June specifically so I'd be able to put this one on it; it's so well-written and so fascinating. The insight into Gem's character (the insight into everyone's characters, actually), the attention to the details that are so easy to forget as later canon events loom larger in our minds, the space given to work and effort and wonder and travel. It makes me grateful to be in this fandom where we can go over the same events over and over and change what we pluck out as important every time.

the last and final translation of love; Ten_Of_Swords - E1 Sausage-centric post-canon, 1.1k oneshot, E-rated for gore. Sausage turns to necromancy to get Pearl back. Awful interactions with bodies and grief follow. The tangle of emotion presented so neatly in every sentence of this is stunning. The juxtaposition of unspeakable care and equally unspeakable, gory horror. The bone-deep ache of loss. The absurdity of still being alive. It's all there, and captured so cleanly. Ten_Of_Swords is a wonderful writer in full generality -- you should check out its other Empires and Life Series works as well!

and, for a beat, we think he's running; maikuria - E1 Sausage-centric roleswap, 4.2k oneshot. After that business with the demon, the Vigil decides it wants Sausage instead of Pix. Gorgeous stuff being done with work skins in this one, and on top of beautiful, thematically-coherent formatting, perfect characterization. The kind of characterization that picks out not just the essence of a character but all the ways they are strange and human and interconnected and a little funny. It feels like maikuria knows these guys, y'know? In the way only an author can know characters they've written and loved for a long time. (maikuria has a lot of excellent Empires S1 fic in general and I encourage people to look at all of it!!)

trying to kill the moon; hoorayy - E2 Pix/Oli roadtrip horror AU, 9.4k oneshot. Pix has a car and is on his way to nowhere in particular. Oli joins him. Things try to catch up with them. Hi, what's up, it's time to talk about the best Pix/Oli fic of all time. It's so good it made me forget I've ever written Pix/Oli; surely this is the only version of their relationship I could ever know about? It captures late summer golden light in a way I thought only cameras could. It captures the feeling of saying goodbye at the end of a beautiful day and realizing you can feel your smile hurting your face. It is so funny and haunting and beautiful. hoorayy has other great Empires and DSMP works as well! Highly recommend.

Like A Butterfly On A Pin; savannah_owl - E1 fWhip & Gem that is mostly about fWhip/Sausage, 1.7k oneshot. fWhip's down bad for the King of Mythland. Gem demands he sort his shit out before it goes sideways for all of them. You like vampires? <- said with a huge obnoxious grin. You like, specifically, vampires that are about desires that you can never entirely satisfy and desperate hungers set against necessity and morality? You like siblings who know each other too well fighting? You like loving descriptions of blood? Then I am shoving this fic into your hands and telling you to go read it now. Also! savannah_owl has SO much vampire fic for so many pairings across Empires, Life Series, and Hermitcraft; highly recommend 'em.

Hermitcraft

redstone signal fifteen; jibbingjibberish - S10 Etho/Zed, 4.3k oneshot. E-rated! Zed invites Etho over to test out his game-ified fucking machine! Really really fun redstone fucking machine shenaniganery, in, somehow, classic Hermit style. Delightful amount of attention paid to redstone mechanics (though I'll note I have no idea how close this does or does not get to being a build-able machine) and Etho's particular love of redstone machinery. Funny and charming and perfectly characterized.

Dusty Relics; MawoftheMagnetar - S9 Etho & Doc though mostly it's about Decked Out, 575 words. Doc's been investigating the artifakes Etho nabs for him from Decked Out 2. They're awfully good replicas, aren't they? Extremely fun-upsetting twist; don't worry, I won't ruin it for you.

slice of strawberry-flavored life; these_godforsaken_halls - Various Hermits and Lifers Animal Crossing AU, 6.8k oneshot. A glimpse into the lives of the employees and clients of Happy Hermit Housing! Listen, I think we don't give enough credit where it's due; writing hilarious, interesting, specific, well-characterized fluff is hard. And these_godforsaken_halls pulls it off with aplomb! Immaculate character voice, excellent bits, a sibling relationship that made me go, "Oh, yeah, this is genuinely how my brother and I talk to each other."

My Stupidest Intro Yet! | Hermitcraft 10; strifetxt - S10 Joel-centric, 1.4k oneshot. Hermitcraft Joel reckons with the fact that he is, at the time of this recording, the only active Joel around. Fun script-ish format of Joel making heartwarming discoveries about... himself? Truly so immeasurably charming. Joel voice so perfect I could see the video in my mind's eye. Had a grin on my face the whole time I was reading this.

Life Series

Of Love and Loyalty; Elycia7 - Martyn-centric character study, 1.2k oneshot. The evolution of Martyn's relationships and his understanding of these games from Third Life through to Limited Life. Look, when someone gets it, they get it. This person gets Martyn. Lovely and lyrical. I read it and clapped my real life actual hands and went, "Yep, that's Martyn!"

wait the worst is yet to come; glossyblue - Scar-centric Last Life AU in which you trade lives by making out. You ever read an AU that's just perfect for capturing the vibes and themes of the source material and then spinning them out into something wild and lovely? The blurring of death and violence and love and intimacy, the hilarity and the horror and the grief. All of it, right there! And Desert Duo is even kissing about it. It's gorgeous. (Also. Lots of great Life Series and Hermitcraft fic on the glossyblue account. Some of them made me laugh so hard I started coughing.)

choice and mercy; WolffyLuna - Double Life Scott & Cleo, 2.0k oneshot. Scott and Cleo talk about choice, death, and mercy, one night during Double Life. Really beautiful descriptions of what it feels like to have a limited number of lives and a really tender Scott & Cleo relationship that is sharpened and grounded by the ways they differ and tease and wordlessly understand. (WolffyLuna is an absurdly prolific writer who has almost certainly posted something somewhere in their extensive backlog that you will be interested in. Go take a look!)

and it's dark, and there is nobody driving; Sixteenthdays - Third Life Scott & Grian character study, 1.1k oneshot. Scott and Grian talk about making games for your friends. This particular game seems to have gone really, really bad. I love this one for how it translates the bright chipper friendly ways we know these people are/can be into the grief and exhaustion of a game where you kill your friends, taken dead seriously. Scott and Grian both feel so beaten-down and lost and trying to figure it out, and that vibe is conveyed so cleanly through the whole thing.

alternative solutions; soapflowers - Limited Life Scott & Martyn cannibalism, 311 words. Scott drags Pearl's lifeless body out of the water. He and Martyn eat her! It's a nice time. Do you like cannibalism and Mean Gills? Great. This fic is exactly that, with some really fun implications about death and respawn to boot.

Damn Yellow Composites; litbynosun - Secret Life Scar-centric character study, 1.1k oneshot. Scar goes back to Trader Scar's after the Secret Life finale. He takes care of his flowers. Extremely charming Scar narration. Extremely tender caretaking and attention to the mundane work of being alive in the world. Winding down, realizing you can tend to yourself and your surroundings, and also realizing you're alone.

something to keep you warm; codesandstuffs - Wild Life Tango-centric hurt/comfort, 2.8k oneshot. Three times Tango wakes up in Wild Life, and what he does after. Really truly the most impeccable Tango characterization. Delighted by the ways the details the narration chooses to linger on indicate the kind of person Tango is and the kind of history he's had. The mundane and the tender rendered beautifully.

[writingdevil]

Free [Hermittober24 Day Thirty One]

(Prompt list created by @collierose1 )

(This was such a cool and creative thing to be a part of!I've really enjoyed getting to do something different with my writing,and getting to put the Hermits in either torturous situations,or just sweet scenarios.Thank you to everyone who liked my writing-it feels unreal that people actually enjoyed my ideas!Thank you @collierose1 for these Hermittober24 prompts as well!)

And the universe said I love you.

Xisuma loved Hermitcraft,and all the Hermits that had found their way into this chaotic family.

It was Halloween,and Xisuma decided to just take a day to stroll through the server,and see what everyone was up to for today.

The first people he saw were Zedaph and Jevin,in the middle of building some sort of haunted escape room for the others to try.When Jevin saw him,he lifted a hand that had bony fingers underneath the slime and waved at him,which Xisuma happily reciprocated.

Not too further down,he saw Cleo,Bdubs and Skizz decorating.Cleo was busy making some spooky armour stands in the entrance to a forest,and Bdubs was providing them with light,plants wrapped around the trunks of trees,with small, shining bundles of pure light to illuminate the area. Skizz was attempting to help by posing for Cleo so that they knew which way to turn the armour stands,but he kept getting distracted by Bdubs' plants,in awe at their beauty,causing Cleo to roll their eyes in playful annoyance.

And the universe said that you have played the game well.

He kept walking,until he heard boisterous laughter to the left of him,and he found a long wooden table covered in pumpkin seeds and pieces,and sitting in the middle of the table,was Gem,who didn't look too happy.Joel and Etho were on either side of her, and they were both laughing uncontrollably.Xisuma soon saw that the object of their laughter was the pumpkin Gem had carved-a very-interesting portrait of Etho for the face.

Gem crossed her arms and glared at the pumpkin, until Etho playfully tapped her shoulder with his fluffy,white tail,and that was enough to get her to smile and giggle as well.

Xisuma loved that,no matter what insane event went on in this server,everyone was still friends at the end of the day-that there was the safety that no feelings would get hurt.

He suddenly jumped at the sound of fireworks nearby,and he glanced up at the sky at the exact right moment,as both Cub and Doc flew around in the sky,and when Cub shot a rocket in the air,the firework was a bright skeleton face.He heard Doc cheer in delight,as if they had spent a good while trying to perfect this.

And the universe said you are stronger than you know.

He walked further down the path,where all the builds were beginning to surround him,and he was coming up on the area where their Halloween party would be held.

On one side,he saw TFC and Beef eating chocolate apples that Joe was making,who was also telling them about some obscure story that Xisuma couldn't wrap his head around.

On the other side,False was swooping through the air,following the directions that Stress was yelling up to her,telling her which way the decorations should go on the builds.

Iskall was also there,but he wasn't helping decorate.He was,to put it more accurately,judging Stress' choices,and making it known.Stress kept pausing in her instructions to laugh and take a jab at Iskall.False would just roll her eyes and watch the banter in amusement.

Also watching the entertainment,was Keralis,but he was sitting a few feet away,munching on some sweets to himself.Xisuma chuckled as he saw a dark fin poke out of the water behind Keralis.But instead of getting scared,Keralis just held a piece of candy over the water,without taking his eyes off of Stress and Iskall,and dropped the sweet into the awaiting mouth of Xb,who munched happily.

And the universe said the darkness you fight is within you.

Xisuma froze for a second,as he watched Welsknight walk by,but then the knight suddenly froze abruptly,staring at a window.

Worry and concern rose up within Xisuma,as he knew the demons Wels dealt with,and he made his way over to try and talk to the other.

But then Welsknight laughed-a soft,genuine smile on his face,as he shook his head in amusement and walked off.

Xisuma was frozen in surprise,until Wels clapped him on the shoulder as he walked past him.

And the universe said you are not alone.

Xisuma waved at Ren and Tango,and they both waved back with excited smiles.They were both laying on the grass,the shade of an apple tree above them,and they chatted to each other with soft and almost longing looks in their eyes.Xisuma wondered what they were talking about.

He didn't get time to wonder about it for long as he heard a ruckus on the other side of him.

He sighed fondly at the sight of Boatem-he wasn't sure why he still called them that,the name just seemed to fit them-as the five of them were playfully bantering with each other,showing off their costumes,and letting the others fix something that was out of place.

Pearl was wearing a wolf onesie,and was letting Jellie bat at her furry ears.Impulse was the one holding Jellie,and he was wearing a cyborg outfit, and Xisuma could tell that he had taken some inspiration from Doc and Iskall.

The main source of the noise was coming from Scar,Grian and Mumbo.Grian,dressed as a mad scientist,was talking intensely between the other two Hermits,and he kept gesturing sharply at Mumbo.

Scar was dressed as a vampire,and the red dripping down his chin could've been actual blood for all Xisuma knew.He was talking more casually than Grian,but what he was saying was certainly winding Grian up,if the scrunch of the avian's face was anything to go by.

The source of the argument,Xisuma could only assume,must of been coming from his adoptive son,Mumbo,who was dressed in merely a white sheet,pretending to be a ghost.

Xisuma obviously couldn't tell what Mumbo was saying,but judging from the shake of his figure,he must be getting the same amount of amusement that Scar was at the reaction to his low effort costume.

When Xisuma let a chuckle out,Mumbo's head darted right to where Xisuma was,and then Mumbo quickly lifted the sheet over his head,and Xisuma's heart filled up with so much joy as Mumbo beamed at him and waved him over,and soon the rest of Boatem was as well.

This was what Hermitcraft was all about-love.

To be as happy and silly and chaotic as they pleased,because they were free to,because Xisuma wanted this server to be a home that people felt safe and happy in,that they could be who they wanted to be.

He didn't want his Hermits to be weighed down by past scars or guilt-he wanted them to feel like their true selves,to shine brightly without anything holding them back.

That was what Hermitcraft was for,and you know what?Xisuma thinks he did a pretty good job.

And the universe said I love you because you are love.

[pumpkinpuffgirls]

What types of videogames would the girls like?? (feel free to include Bliss and Bunny)

We've seen the girls play a few games throughout the TV series. One based on Atari Pitfall, another was a fighting game. We even see the Mayor playing what's essentially Legend of Zelda (OoT or MM) which, fun fact, was due to the release of one of those games eating up the time of the people working on the show (forget which one it was).

Here's a comprehensive list of what, in my opinion, the girls would enjoy:

At baseline, all the girls like fighting games. Especially the beat 'em up type like Super Smash Bros and Street Fighter.

Bubbles loves fun, kid-friendly type RPGs and simulation games. The stereotypical cozy game and games normally associated with being kid-friendly. You know that she would play farming-type games when she got older

Blossom also like RPGs but she will branch beyond turn-based and play tactical rpgs and real-time strategy games. God games also fall into this category She would also accept a puzzle game as an easy time-waster if she didn't finish it super quickly

Buttercup is the only one who tries to get away with playing games above her age rating. This girl wants GTA and Call of Duty. Though she can get toxic-competitive. She should really stick to Mortal Combat or action adventure games where you fight a lot of guys at once like dynasty warriors.

Bunny likes games with animals, so she loves a lot of mascot platformers like Sonic and Banjo Kazooie. She gets lost with collect-a-thons wanting to collect everything and gets upset when she's missing something.

Bliss likes games that give her tasks to do daily and goals to work towards and a place to dress up and organize. She also joins the farming game department, but games like Animal Crossing and Slime Rancher also come to mind. Not exclusively cozy-games, but games that either have a goal-oriented aspect or a "restore the x" kind of mission at their core.

Some of their interests would blend together I'm sure. Though this is what I feel would be each's preferred type of game.

[heloflor]

Was thinking a bit about how “The Devil’s Playhouse” has a lot more comedy than people make it out to be, and while especially thinking about “The Penal Zone” I realized this episode is actually very very very very gay. Like, I’m pretty sure it’s the Telltale episode with the highest amount of gay moments (205 is second on this list, what with Sam getting catcalled by a moleman, Max flirting with Mr. Reaperphone, the whole bachelor party, Peppers etc).

I think what I really like about those moments is that it’s a great example of normalization. The characters are incredibly casual about it, talking about gay relationships the exact same way one would talk about straight relationships, it’s really neat to see! Especially considering that this game was made in 2010, a whooping 5 years before gay marriage was legal in the whole US. It's crazy and great how much they were able to get away with!

(Screenshots of all these moments with timestamps (and quotes) under the cut. To have as little pics as possible, only a small section of each dialogue is taken. And to have a limit of two screenshots per pic max, some dialogues that are cut in two parts in-game have the second part pasted under the first. The timestamps puts you at the beginning of each conversation. All footage from NapalmX717 with the screenshots in chronological order of this video)

Max: “What can I say, Sam? Alien ships love to abduct me. It’s not my fault I look so probe-able.” (9:44)

Sam: “Nice work, little buddy! Make sure you wait three days to call, or he’ll thing you’re desperate.” (11:47)

Max: “Well, he IS pretty charismatic, Sam. And he’s from space, which is a plus. But you’re the only hairy, overweight, domineering control freak I need, Sam.” (20:38)

Sam: “I don’t need to go to another planet for a methane rich environment, as long as I’ve got you, pal.”

Max: “That’s really sweet and obvious, Sam.” (22:46)

Skun-ka’pe: “Perfect! Just the one I wanted to see ha ha ha ha!”

Sam: “Keep the hands where we can see ‘em, pal.” (23:36)

Max: “We could just give ourselves tongue-baths, like cats and flight attendants do!” (30:57)

Sam: “Why do we have jumper cables? Neither of us knows how to use them.”

Max: “It’s simple, Sam: the RED cable goes on the RIGHT nipple, the BLACK cable clamps to the…” (34:42)

Max: “Oh boy! Now I can finally set up my 24-hours adults-only naked bunny chat line.” (34:58)

Sam: “Toys...Toys… we must prepare… the toys….”

Max: “Well, that’s just a typical Friday night for YOU, Sam.” (36:45)

Flint Paper: “Oh. Well yeah, that could be it. I was thinking it was you, Sam!”

Max: “You think you know a guy. I’m not angry, Sam, just very disappointed.” (1:03:49)

(For context they’re talking about who might be Girl Stinky’s secret admirer)

Max: “I can’t lie to Flint Paper, Sam!” (1:05:20)

Max: “What kind of pretend mother would I be if I didn’t worry about our imaginary baby?” (1:10:31)

Momma Bosco: “Oh, it’s not all bad. I’m getting better at apparating. And now I don’t leave a trail of ectoplasmic slime behind every time I leave the room.”

Max: “That’s better than Sam can say.” (1:23:13)

Sam: “I’m not gonna rest until I find the guy who killed my partner!” (1:43:13)

Max: “Wow. I feel really very close to you now, Agent Superball.” (1:45:33)

Sam: “I don’t like the thought of you teleporting off without me, Max.” (1:46:33)

Max: “Sam, this is all so sudden! I… I don’t know what to say!” (2:07:10)

Sam: “I think one of us should try to smash through that window with his rock-hard, melon-sized head.”

Max: “And I think one of us should try the door, unless he wants to spend the rest of the day picking plate glass out of his partner’s fluffy white nether regions.” (2:17:00)

Girl Stinky: “Sam and Max? Don’t tell me Skun-ka’pe wants YOU guys to be his love slaves, too?” (2:24:48)

Girl Stinky: “Eww. He wishes. He’s SO not my type. You only have to date an evil gorilla once to learn never to make THAT mistake again.”

Max: “We’ve all been there, girlfriend.” (2:25:07)

Girl Stinky: “Gee, it sounds like YOU two should go out with him. Would you like me to give you guys some privacy?” (2:27:33)

Max: “You’re my best friend, Sam! I know you’d take a bullet for me!” (2:31:02)

Sam: “You keep coming up with creepy disaster scenarios that always end with you eating me, Max. It’s getting annoying.”

Max: “If you don’t like it, then stop looking so damn tasty.” (2:38:11)

Max: “Think of something quick, Sam. I don’t like the way he’s undressing me with his eyes.” (2:53:22)

[spiteful--art]

I just had. The most cursed idea. For the Divine Beasts AU. While watching Alpharad videos.

So hear me out-- what if. What if you could cATCH THE BOSSES IN EACH NATION/REGION--

BECAUSE I MEAN LIKE-- IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT-- each nation already has its pair of Legendaries. Mond has Dvalin and Andrius, Liyue has Azhdaha and Childe, Inazuma has Raiden and Signora, etc. Half of what i listed can already TECHNICALLY be counted as pokemon, and pokemon are literally just Pocket Monsters. So wHOS TO SAY WE CANT TREAT THE MONSTERS AND CREATURES OF TEYVAT LIKE POKEMON--

I mean, first off we gotta figure out how to make pokeballs but like AFTER THAT WE CAN GO BUCKWILD-- we can catch LITERALLY ALMOST EVERY ENEMY AND MOB. The Regisvines are literally just Grass type plus whatever element they are, Hypostasis are just pure whatever element they are, Primo Geo is Rock type plus what element they are that week and so on

I am ONTO SOMETHING OH MY GOD--

Also imagine how MORBID AND FUCKED UP itd be if you could catch Signora. You are literally fighting a dead woman and are making her fight other people wtffffff

My god. Your brain, it's HUGE.

I imagine that in this iteration of Divine Beasts, there isn't an Impostor on the throne but the characters are still really zealous over anyone claiming to be the Creator, so our protagonist still has to find a way to get back home. Luckily, they have the help of Teyvat's creatures!

Maybe Teyvat Pokeballs are made with iron chunks, and with the corollas/stamens of the flowers. The rarer materials make stronger pokeballs, and since there are a lot of materials to use the Creator can mix and match in order to find out some neat combinations.

As for the captured creatures, I'd wager that since Pokemon are said to be able to shrink their size, a similar thing happens to anything caught by the Creator. The captured creature shrinks, of course, but they also take on a cuter, chibi-esque form. They can shift between their chibi form and real form anytime, but most of the time they're set in chibi mode.

And while I'm on this chain of thought, what if evolution occurs as well? The monsters of Teyvat clearly have different "forms", so the Creator should be able to evolve them into their stronger forms. Hilichurls would definitely need to be exposed to elemental energies and be feed a lot of meat in order to unlock their different branches. Funnily enough, I think this makes them the Eevees of Teyvat xD This same principle applies to Whopperflowers, slimes, all sorts of monsters.

When it comes to the bosses, I imagine that the way the Creator would catch them is similar to how you calm down the Noble Pokemon in Legends: Arceus. We'd create balms that soothe the boss monsters, throw them at them, and when the time is right capture them! But this may only apply to the monster bosses...

For "human" bosses, Childe, Signora, and Raiden Shogun if I recall correctly, they can't be caught... Unless a condition is met. See, powerful they may be, Childe and Signora are still humans. But in their respective boss battles, they take on an inhuman form (Foul Legacy and Crimson Witch of Embers). It's only in those forms can you catch Childe and Signora, and the chibi-fying effect applies to them. You can let your imagination run wild on that one ;3

As for Raiden... Well, I just plain don't know! Maybe her status as an Archon prevents her from being captured. Then again, I know there's some wacky story stuff going on with her, so until I find out for myself what happens in Inazuma's storyline, her status as Catchable is undecided.

[everlasting-rainfall]

PLEASE READ!

Hey, everyone. I'm on mobile right now so excuse any problems with what I'm doing

I have a request for all of you, and it's about requests. I'm requesting you to send more in but of specific types.

Im going through some stuff currently and it's very stressful...

So I'll get to the point. I'd like you all to please send in requests about certain things so I have something comforting to work on.

Im gonna answer them once everything has cleared up and gotten a bit better

Its something to keep me occupied when I'm bored of other things.

Now then the types of requests I'd like you to send in are basically things that bring me a lot of comfort

Ask me about my OC's like something simple like "What are their worst fears?", "How do they deal with *insert scenario*", and "What would happen if *insert scenario*?"

I do have a post about them and I do have a recent post about them that includes their designs. Plus a few old ones that describe in detail.

I don't know if it's in the masterlist though... Sorry!

Also I do have some other new ones too like Esme the Angel whose Nika's wife, Tender the Skeleton whose T-Bones Wife, Dot the Slime Girl whose Paulie and Iceberg's wife, etc

Another thing is to please send in requests for comfort characters of mine. I'll warn you though that some of my comfort characters are probably odd.

Theyre comfort in the sense of big scary evil thing that could and would squash you like an insect is kind hearted and soft with someone...

My comfort characters are the following...

-Figarland Garling

-Joyboy

-Imu

-Nika

-Gorosei

-Obscure Characters (It is always fun to write them!)

Another thing for comfort characters would probably be like platonic/familial yandere scenarios meaning no romance

My comfort characters for these are different of course and they're the following

-The Vegapunks

-The Marines of Navarone (G8)

-Movie Characters

-Accino Family (Ice Hunter Arc)

-Shanks and his Crew

-Straw Hats

-Kozuki Family

-Any Seven Warlords of the Sea Characters

Remember that there won't be any romance for you with these characters if you ask for platonic or familial

Another thing is that I like to write for new concepts. Since I don't have time to explain any of my AU's.

I'll list them off with a tiny summary and let you pick one that sounds interesting. Feel free to ask questions and I'll answer them when my internet is back on

-Crane Game AU

Reaching into a crane game to grav something only to be grabbed and pulled into a plush world

-Love Apocalypse AU

A virus turns people into zombies focused on love, you got it and wound up with someone. What happens when the virus is cured and the person doesn't wanna let you go?

-Fiction into Reality AU

Fictional character winds up in your world and wants to take you back with them

-Mystical Forest AU

Living in a town surrounded by a giant forest on all sides, it's full of monsters and one of the monsters decides they like you.

-Containment AU

Monsters have returned to be the dominant species of earth as humans hurt the earth. Monsters have been captured and it's basically SCP Foundation.

-Pastel Broadcast AU (Beware, this one is based off the Dark Web)

Being sold to someone on the dark web who hosts a pastel and cutesy broadcast where they do typical dark web stuff. You think you're next until they say the new episode of their broadcast is about introducing a new character. You.

-Coraline AU

Self explanatory I feel

-Time Traveller AU

Invent a time machine, go back in time, get mistaken for someone who passed away. Time is slowly modifying to turn you into that person for real.

-Toon AU

Find an old animation studio that brought its mascot to life. The mascot brings you to their world and you slowly are turning into a toon like them.

Those are the au's and you can suggest familial/platonic for any of these by the way.

You also don't have to request my comfort characters if you really don't want to

And that should be all that I have to say. Thank you so very much if you decide to send in a request.

And if you don't then still thank you for reading this.

See you later! And thank you again!