#I can't afford to buy shit right now
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queer-ragnelle · 2 months ago
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If anyone wants to help a girl obtain some movies from streaming services who would rather gatekeep rare media than release physical copies for people to purchase, I'll trade you all the free books you could ever hope for and my first born child.
Sir Lanval (2011)
Lancelot du Lac (1970)
Les Chevaliers de la table ronde (1958)
I'm also working on possible solutions the best I can!
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disdaidal · 2 years ago
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Good news: your girl got a call from her school today, passed all her exams and is getting her high school diploma this spring/summer, so yay.
I’m “only” 34 after all, but what the fuck. I did it.
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vin-robles · 1 year ago
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just turned in a big comm do i splurge on bg3 even though i still have a billion things to do or do i buy the first the girl from the other side omnibus and content myself with reading that for now decisions
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stranger-awakening · 1 year ago
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dear friend i go to concerts with sent me a little tiktok that was just the prices of e*as tour tickets and i had to text back and say i can’t afford it do y’all know how like fucking embarrassing that is
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inkskinned · 9 months ago
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we were drunk off mezcal and my dog had his paws crossed like he was fancy and we were giggling about it and i told you that with the sun coming back i can feel my fingers again and you grabbed my wrist and jokingly shook my limp hands while saying i have you i got you and i wanted to tell you i love you in that moment but it's actually just that it's spring and love actually seems like something that i can afford once in a while so long as i'm not overwhelmed by the crushing weight of having to do my laundry
i don't get so sad on sundays anymore and part of that is you but also part of it is that i've been watching a bird melodrama in the tree outside my window - first the robins had the run of it, then the doves. most recently a family of sparrows came through. the sky was pink today like a kiss, and i felt the pastel wrap in a warm piebald snake around my chest and hum herself into my bones
thank god for every person that forgives me for the depressive spirals i go on every winter without-fail like i swear there are absolutes in this world and it's stuff like. stoats go white in winter. the sun comes over the east. when it gets cold all parts of my soul go numb and the light can't pass through my iris without a tattoo gun. how many times can i tell a friend i'm sorry i wasn't talking to you, i truly wasn't talking to anyone
thank god i can feel my skin right now and you hold my weak little hand in your hand and then you flip it over so you can read my palm and you're smiling while you run fingertips over lines and read out my fate like it says here you like a good grillcheese sandwich and admit it you make salads by buying the pre-made spring mix and i have all your astrology shit memorized and i read your horoscope first when i'm checking my own even-though-i-don't-believe-in-it (but just in case) and i want to kiss you just to watch the blush spread in a tulip from under your freckles in that way it does, how you pull back and wrinkle your nose in laughter
thank god but today for the first time in a month i finally texted my friends back and actually made plans to hang out (how's that! barring disaster!) and i let my dog put his big muddy paws on my nice sweater and yeah actually when it's bad i always think i can't do that again. i can't crawl back up that mountain
but the sun touched me on the face this morning and we had a nice long talk about it and i said i gotta go the long way again huh and she nodded and shook back her solarflare hair and looked over to her moon girlfriend and she said you can do it. better things on the horizon.
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keeksandgigz · 1 year ago
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my guy
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eddie munson x fem!reader
Eddie being your personal handyman and stupidly in love.
cw: 2k words. no warnings just two kids being absolutely smitten for each other. tooth rotting fluff. teeny allusion to smut. Eddie being a flustered mess bless him. 18+ mdni
AN: this is literally the most low stakes thing i've ever written i just started cheesing at the idea of eddie cheesing at being called your guy
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The sputtering of the washing machine startles you.
Huffing, you put your book down on the couch, rising from the depth of the cushions in which you had settled yourself into after finishing your chores and go assess the issue.
"Shit," the floor is wet and you shudder at the feeling of the cold soapy water getting into the bottoms of your socks as you slowly make your way to the washing machine to unplug it.
You try your best to dry the floor, wincing at the feeling of wet socks on the linoleum floor, cursing under your breath at the cold feel of the fabric against your skin.
Despite the floor being dry, your washing machine was broken, and you couldn't afford to buy a new one. Fortunately, your neighbor, Eddie had been your own personal handyman ever since you mentioned in passing that your sink was leaking a bit after moving into your place a couple months ago. The day after he was at your door, toolbox in hand. Your sink was fixed in less than a couple hours.
You knock at his front door, three precise, well timed knocks. Your mind cannot help but start counting just to see how long it will take him to open his door.
One, two, three, four, five, si--
The rattling of the door handle distracts you from your counting. Eddie's eyes are wide as they stare at you. His hair is tied in a low bun and he's fidgeting with a guitar pick in his hand. He must have been playing.
He's really quiet for a second, then clears his throat. "Oh, um. Hey, what's up?"
"Hey, nothing much? just wondering if you're busy right now" your tone always softens up with him around.
He looks around his apartment, almost as if he needed to remember if there was anything he should've been doing.
"Nope, don't think so. Why?" He leans against his doorframe, and he's cute in the way his pitch perks up, his smile expands just a bit to let a few crinkles form around his eyes.
"Well um... my washing machine broke and I can't afford to buy another one. I have a really important interview tomorrow morning and I need a clean dress shirt to wear. I thought I could get my guy to take a look at it and assess the damage?" you lightly punch your fist across his chest and he blushes a bit. You can tell by the way he starts blinking a bit faster that he's flustered.
"Your- your guy?" he stutters, almost as if he heard nothing else aside from that.
"Yeah, silly. My guy, like, my handyman" you smile at him, and if someone could get even more nervous, you're sure that Eddie just did, because he lets out a breathy laugh.
"Right. Your handyman guy, of course" and he shakes his head, smiling to himself a bit.
"So... can you do it?" you ask, breaking the silence.
"Yeah, no of course, sweetheart. Gimme a couple minutes and I'll be right over to you" he says smiling.
You head back to your apartment, leaving the door open for him to follow you with his toolbox, and Eddie feels like he’s lost every sense of reason when he enters and becomes surrounded by your scent.
The fabric softener you use has taken over every corner of your house, but he’s not complaining. Taking one last sniff for courage, he steps into the kitchen, where you’re sitting at, waiting for him.
“Alright, can I take a look at your washing machine?” he asks, tilting his head.
“Yeah, it’s right this way” you lead him to the laundry room, and Eddie’s suffocating. You’re everywhere.
He kneels in front of the machine and opens its door.
"What's this interview for anyway if it's got you actin' so nervous?" He says from inside the washing machine. He's fidgeting with the rubber at the opening, the hose.
"It's for this job at the school. I applied to teach at the middle school, but I'm not sure if they'll give it to me" you say, panic settling in. He's taking too long, you're done for. No clean shirt, no job.
"Nah, sweetheart, there's no reason why they shouldn't. You're incredibly smart, from all the books I've seen you read, your apartment is all books, you nerd" he starts laughing, and then stops.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to call you a nerd." He takes his head out of the washing machine. "I just- I know you're gonna do great. And if you don't maybe you can become my apprentice, would you mind passing me my flashlight?" he gives you a half smile.
Reaching for his toolbox you pass it to him.
"See? You're already perfect for the job, you're hired" he says, making you laugh. He smiles proudly to himself, and he's happy that you can't see him from inside the washing machine, because he's sure he's bursting with joy at the sound of your laughter.
"Thanks, Ed. I'll consider it." you say, and immediately after you hear a oh shit! coming from inside the machine. Concern washes over your face.
"Ed? What's wrong?" you say, as you carefully step closer towards him.
“I know what the problem is." He takes his head out again The rubber thingy that helps you close the thingy is broken” he says, like you understood what he meant.
“For a handyman you sure have your way with words” you laugh, and he doesn’t even care that he’s made a fool of himself by forgetting what the rubber gasket was called. Because he’s made you laugh.
"So how do I get this rubber thingy fixed, mr handyman?" you ask, voice still amused at how flustered he is.
"Well, I'd need to go down the hardware store and get a replacement, but it's 8PM, so I can't do anything about it now, sweetheart. Sorry" he says, and it breaks his heart to have to say no to you.
"Oh, okay." your voice sounds sad, it hurts him. "Thanks anyway, Eddie. I'll stop by the hardware store tomorrow morning before my interview if you wanna stop by in the afternoon and finish this?"
He thinks about it, about the interview. About how much you said you want the job.
"Wait, I have an idea. What if you wash your clothes in my washing machine for tonight? So you can have your shirt ready for your interview, then tomorrow I can go and get the gaskets to fix it. It's called a gasket, not rubber thingy" he says, playing with his hair.
"Ed it's fine, I can go get it" you say, trying not to blush at how gentle and kind he is "I'll take you up on your offer of using your machine, though. Thanks, Ed. You're too nice" you say, reaching for the basket of wet clothes on top of the dishwasher.
"Anytime, sweetheart. Y'know I take good care of my clientele" he says, smug smile on his lips. You giggle and fake a gasp.
"Are you cheating on me? Are you being someone else's guy?!" he laughs and goes along with it.
"Well, Mrs. Davis did ask me to fix her bathtub, after learning from someone that I fixed their sink" he said, a fake accusatory stare at you.
"You should get paid for this, Ed. You've already fixed my sink, my door hinges, helped me change my lock and now my washing machine. Soon the whole complex is gonna ask you to do their maintenance" you laugh.
"I do it out of the kindness of my heart" he says, taking a dramatic bow , then rises and leans against the washing machine. "Really, though, I don't mind doing it. I enjoy being helpful. I don't want your money, sweetheart"
"No, Eddie, I insist. I need to pay you, especially after you said you're getting the rubber thingy for me, what was it called again? A gusset?"
"Gasket" he says smiling, pointing a cheeky finger at you. Then the air becomes a bit tense, he stiffens up. You see him takes a deep breath, he's suddenly nervous which puts you on edge. Did you say something wrong? Then he speaks up again. "Tell you what, as a payment for my services, I pick you up Friday night at 7 and we have dinner. What do you say?"
Shit. You would not have pegged him for the type to be that smooth, but he had you. He liked you and he was sweet to you and he wanted to take you out to dinner. It helped that he was cute. There was no hesitation when you nodded your head yes.
"I say that's a great idea, Ed. I'll let you know how the interview goes. Should we go to your apartment?" you say. You notice the quizzical, borderline alarmed, look on his face.
"So I can wash my stuff, I mean" an awkward laugh escapes you as he motions for you to lead the way.
His apartment is the same layout as yours, but rather than books, his walls are filled with painted figurines, guitars, notebooks and DnD game sets. A true nerdy den.
"Um, the washing machine is down the hall. We have the same one, let me know if you need anything, okay?" he says, heading over to the couch, setting his toolbox down and picking up his guitar.
His laundry detergent is strong. The thought of this load of washing smelling like him makes your head spin.
After you've started the load, you head out of the laundry room and head over to the couch, where Eddie is. You swear his eyes glint a little when he sees you.
"Hey mr. handyman." you say, plopping down next to him "Keep playing, I'm just gonna watch you." You smile at him.
His face is concentrated, tongue darting out of his lips every once in a while. Cute, you think, a silly quirk that makes your mind travel to places that it should not even dare to go, you haven't even had your first date yet. God, you wanna kiss him.
He plays some aggressive guitar chords, one after the other, music sheets scattered on his knee, balancing precariously as he taps the rhythm with his head, his hair falling out of its confinements with each bob of his head.
"I hear you play sometimes." You interrupt. He raises his head, his hair has all fallen out of the bun and lays on his shoulders.
"What?" he says weakly.
"Sometimes, in the afternoon, because you're so respectful, I hear you play. And I- I just stop whatever I'm doing and listen to you and- and it's so cool. Your playing is so cool" you stop your ramble, because now he's staring at you and he's making you nervous. He's closer, and closer, and closer. And he's kissing you.
His lips are soft, albeit a bit too wet from all the times he's licked his lips to focus. His hand is on your cheek and it's big and warm and his breath is on you and you just melt into him. Soft kisses, quick kisses.
After what feels like hours, your mouth is open and you're reaching for his shirt, but he stops you, a puzzled look on your face. "Let's save this for another time, sweetheart." He says, and you can tell he's struggling to say no to you "I wanna take my time with you. Maybe after our date?" he gives you a sly smile and you think you have melted into the cushions.
"Can we cuddle, then?" you say shyly and he opens his arms for you to fall in, you take a deep breath. He's warm and smells nice.
"For a handyman you kiss really well" you say, laughing a bit. He jerks his head and quirks an eyebrow.
"How many handymen have you kissed?" his tone is dramatic and you know he's joking.
"None that I am aware of, but y'know, it could be a side job" You giggle.
"I thought I was your guy!" He says with a whine, and he makes you laugh like no man has ever made you laugh before.
“Maybe you can be my guy for real then” you say, smiling, finally holding eye contact with him.
“Yeah, I can be your guy, sweetheart.”
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luvvixu · 11 months ago
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how to tame your boyfriend
content: bf!gojo, mentioned of sex and sexual stuffs, 16+, fluff, drabble, does not contain any smut, i think gojo's like this can't blame me
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wanna know how to tame your annoying (and horny) boyfriend when your flight is delayed?
that's very easy. just buy him some lego and he would go on instant mute.
"i can't believe you really bought satoru—a full 27 years old ass man—a set of legos?" your friend from the other line, shoko, wheeze and at the same time confused for your action to tame your boyfriend.
sighing hardly while massaging your temple, you answered. "i had to, sho. he won't stop bothering me to have a quickie since our flight was delayed and he was bored."
your flight overseas was delayed for three hours because of some maintenance needed to be checked in the aircraft. now, satoru thought it is a good idea to spend those three hours having a passionate fornication.
of course you immediately dislike the idea even though you are tempted too. you value your morals, ethics, and dignity. unlike your boyfriend, he has no shame and would even proudly tell some random people that you are his by some marks solely created.
"could've played with his phone but seriously, why lego?" shoko was still laughing, now that you opened your camera and showed her your boyfriend who's literally sitting on the airport floor with bricks of lego on his hands.
satoru looked so focused and unbothered, which is an extremely good thing—like he couldn't stop whispers in your ears, whining about how needy he is right now and how badly he wanted you. but now he's occupied, it is the greatest relief for you.
"first, his phone is dead and was tempt to buy a new fucking phone just because he said charging using a power bank takes a lot of time. had to smack the shit outta him and force him to get out of the apple store."
yep, the idiot forgot to charge his phone before you left for the airport. now his phone is dead, the desire to buy a new one instead of waiting for his phone to be charged in a powerbank is crazy. although, money is not a problem for the head of the gojo clan—he got figures that cost more, more, more than your annual salary.
"second, lego made him focused and entertained on building it, not for having scandalous sex with me. i feel like he's being my child than being my boyfriend at this moment." you joked, lowering your voice so your big baby wouldn't hear you.
"you said it yourself that satoru is a full package." shoko rolled her eyes, but she's not wrong tho. satoru is everything, he could easily afford things and could even make some things impossible to possible.
"touché."
shoko let out a laugh. "anyway, gotta go now. got a client in an hour so bye my boo, mwa!" sending also a virtual flying kiss to your platonic friend, you both bid a farewell to with sweet smile on your faces.
as you ended the call, you turned your attention to your boyfriend who's now almost done on his lego that he's been occupying himself for like an hour now.
you made to take some photo of him and post it on your close friends in instagram because this scene of your boyfriend is literally a wholesome and definitely iconic. satoru glanced at you when he heard you giggle at some adorable shots of your boyfriend.
"what are you laughing at?" your boyfriend glanced up to you, confused and warily.
you shook your head, holding your laughter to not raise any suspicion. "nothing babe, just focus on fishing your lego instead of other things."
satoru showed you the figure "oh but i'm finished and we still have like an hour before our flight…" he paused. your mouth hangs wide, questioning about how the hell he builds almost five hundred tiny pieces in just an hour?! truly your boyfriend was really something but this is wild.
"how did you—"
"can we have a quickie now?" satoru smiles sheepishly.
your face turns more sour at his shameless request. although you understand that satoru is a man in need, but his neediness sometimes is really out of place and it took a lot of effort just to stop him from doing so.
"no, satoru. instead, we're going to have a quickie stop at the lego shop to buy you some more entertainment."
your boyfriend pouted at your answer like a hurdled puppy. "but i'm enjoying it more when i'm inside you."
that completely took you off guard.
"... tempting but no."
©luvvixu2023
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marikosenwrites · 7 months ago
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karasuno boys - dating headcanons (pt. 1)!
a/n: sen here!! heyy obsessing over our haikyuu boys are we <3 yes i am i'm only on season two right now though, almost season three!! i'll be doing aoba jousai, nekoma, and fukuroudani gakuen! enjoy!
characters: hinata shouyou, kageyama tobio, tanaka ryuunosuke, sugawara koushi (suga-san🥹), sawamura daichi, tsukishima kei (TSUKKI🥹) [pt. 1], yamaguchi tadashi, takeda ittetsu (just me and one of my favorites), ukai keishin [and in that order] {pt.2}
pt. 1 || pt. 2
notes: in this au, kiyoko can't be married to tanaka...yeah. they're still in highschool, btw
gn!reader
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↳ ❝ [ 日向翔陽 HINATA SHOUYOU ] ¡! ❞
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-this cutie omg
-probably the first to confess
-gets all blushy when you're around at the start of the relationship
-you love ruffling his hair
-if you watch him practice until the end, he treats you to meat buns!! if he doesn't have enough money, he'll just share one with you
-kageyama is jealous omg and tsukishima is just like "the chibi got a girlfriend??"
-loves you so very much
-his love language HAS to be words of affirmation and physical affection
-you just can't help but return the affection
-if you don't know how to play volleyball, he's gonna teach you!!
-if you know- he's going to ask you to talk to him
-dates will be chaotic and affectionate
-often cooking dates!
-you love his family especially natsu
-also love them amusement park dates with him
-he's so fun loving and all
-kisses are very innocent, close to no spice at all except when he's feeling super annoyed or something
-loves cuddling with you when it's bedtime <33
-does NOT have a specific schedule rest assured
-calls you his dove (aww)
-you love calling him sunshine <333
-HE'S JUST SO BRIGHT
-I SWEAR
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↳ ❝ [ 影山飛雄 KAGEYAMA TOBIO ] ¡! ❞
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-a sweetheart actually
-he's so cold on the outside but lights up when you're there
-kisses have a little bit of spice
-he's too prideful to confess first ig so you make the move
-loves it when you come to his practice to support him
-at some point he has requested you to become a manager because sometimes ukai thinks you're a distraction for him so asks you to walk out for a bit to let kageyama concentrate
-you bet he has worried over it because he didn't know where you went
-ok onto the main shit
-dates are always somehow sport related (HOW DOES HE KEEP FINDING THEM)
-sometimes an outing or two when he's actually free and not busy with volleyball stuff
-you'd think he isn't clingy...WELL IT'S THE OPPOSITE ALRIGHT.
-he actually craves YOUR attention and YOURS ONLY
-i think you two would have a cat together (named it NOTHING after the other volleyball players you know :/)
-loves your cuddles too
-WAIT WAIT HEAR ME OUT
-YOU KNOW HE BUYS THEM DRINKS RIGHT
-HE WOULD BUY LIKE HUNDREDS FOR YOU IF YOU WANT
-aww the little (wait he's tall) guy
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↳ ❝ [ 田中龍之介 TANAKA RYUUNOSUKE ] ¡! ❞
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-the hot-headed guy just can't get enough of you
-you sometimes make fun of him for being almost bald-
-but he's okay with it because he loves you (as long as you dont do it that often)
-okay so firstly like kiyoko WHEN HE SEES YOU HE CONFESSES TO YOU ALMOST IMMEDIATELY
-one second he's dumbfounded by your beauty, the other he's confessing to you already
-like you reject him first few times
-AND THEN AND THEN YOU START TO FALL FOR HIM
-THEREFORE YOU ACCEPT WOOOOO
-it's uh "Y/N-SAN! I LIKE YOU CAN YOU GO OUT WITH ME?!!!" and then you're just like "ah- yeah. mhm."
-he's just like :o WHAT
-okay that's it for the confession
-dates are always what you want
-if it happens you want to make cake, go for an ice cream shop, an amusement park- whatever, you name it and he can afford it? YOU'RE GOING
-they're all so sweet...
-he's also needy at some point when you're dating
-so...MORE IN MY NSFW LATER
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↳ ❝ [ 菅原孝史 SUGAWARA KOUSHI ] ¡! ❞
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-i'm gonna bet 100 dollars that he's the one confessing
-STEP ONE: get you as his girlfriend
-firstly he's going to ask you to meet him during lunch in the morning
-second when you're both there he confesses
-to his surprise you accept to go out with him and one date turns into two, into three and ON
-STEP TWO: MORE DATES TO COMEEE
-always ice cream dates and baking dates
-always appears to get flour in his fluffy hair
-ALSO ALSO YOU LOVE PATTING HIS HAIR AT ALL TIMES IT'S LIKE COMFORTING YOURSELF
-sometimes picnics too <333
-STEP THREE: there is none for now but THERE WILL BE SOON. SOON ENOUGH.
-his way of giving you affection is by kissing you, cuddling, and giving you praises...
-do you have a praise kink (nvm forget i asked that)
-cuddling in bed is one of his favorite ways to go to sleep
-you stroking his back is too
-you guys are always the talk of the karasuno vb boys group when you guys get together for gatherings (the perfect couple?!?!?!?!)
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↳ ❝ [ 澤村大地 SAWAMURA DAICHI ] ¡! ❞
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-he's definitely the one to confess first being the big boy man he is <3
-literally will kiss you when you accept
-so taken aback you felt like you were going to faint
-his kisses are so gentle help
-ok maybe not sometimes but we all know when that is
-love playing with his ears mayybe?? i know there's nothing different with the rest, but i just feel like it's with daichi
-your first date is an amusement park one ���✨
-p.s. you shared the cotton candy lmao-
-he literally walked you home and your parents invited him in for dinner
-they like him very much thank you
-relationship has been approved now your parents are urging him to marry you even though it's only one week into the relationship-
-now HE'S the one that pats your head every time he passes you in the hallway or whatsoever
-when you move in together LITERALLY EVERYTHING IS YOUR CHOICE NOW
-you can choose the flat, the decorations, the vibes, the furniture- EVERYTHING
-loves you that much yes
-the sweetest guy ever NO DEBATE
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↳ ❝ [ 月島蛍 TSUKISHIMA KEI ] ¡! ❞
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-SALTY SHIMA. THIS MAN IS SO SALTY
-i swear bro
-he has rizz though that's for sure
-he confesses to you first (it was during lunch you remember the day like it was yesterday)
-his kisses are half spicy (igg since tsukishima is that kinda person)
-the mean to the public and only kind to you kind of person <3
-dates are usually home dates (he's an introvert (i headcanon))
-perhaps if you can persuade him (it's a 50/50)
-first date was a movie date
-then you went home with him (you went to his house)
-and met his parents
-they liked you very much <33 now treat you like their daughter
-the next time you went on a date, you brought him to yours and he made a good impression but they don't love him as much as his parents do to you
-i will write the time skip arc for this because i am biased and you literally can't stop me (but tell me if you want more i'll reblog it with more hcs)
-you were so happy for him when he joined the sendai frogs
-cheered for him on every game (LIKE THE SHIRT AND THE SIGNS AND STUFF)
-facepalmed himself out of spite ya bet he got a scolding for that
-"KEI KEI KEI GANABTTE," that was you, screaming at the top of your lungs at your HUSBAND.
-"oi, tsukki, who's that?"
-tsukishima facepalmed himself, earning a glare from you, "my wife."
-"EHH?? TSUKKI HAS A WIFE??"
-lmao the most normal occurrence
-after that koganegawa would often come to you and ask for dirt on kei (screw him for facepalming)
-saltyshima (in the public) → sweetieshima (in front of you only)
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©marikosenwrites 2024-25 all banners, dividers, and work. please do not steal. i own none of the HAIKYUU!!/ハイキュー!! characters mentioned. reblogs, likes, and comments are welcomed. <3
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caesium-55 · 9 months ago
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—seven days. [ ii ]
pairing: max verstappen x manager! reader.
summary: as the third time world champion, max verstappen's manager, you function on the belief that whatever max verstappen wanted, max verstappen shall get. but this time, after four years of working as his manager, you can't give him what he wants anymore and that was to stay.
author's note: not beta-read. not edited. here's part 2 folks. part 3 is on the works now. did i write this fic instead of studying for my important quiz tomorrow? yes, yes i did. pls pray for my score.
masterlist.
For Christmas in 2019, Max has gotten you an apartment near his in Monaco. It is a loft apartment good for one on the 8th floor, a building away from where Daniel and Max lived. Originally, he wants to get you the unit a floor below his. You decline quickly, insisting that you are very fine with rooming with Julia and Kendall, who are both members of the Red Bull PR team whom you have gotten close with since your first year working with Red Bull. Max may have beef with the PR team for making him do a lot of embarrassing shit for the views but you're besties with most of them and actually thank them for making Max suffer through PR stuff because you cannot afford therapy and watching Max suffer through PR-related activities is a good form of free therapy. Also, Monaco apartments are fucking expensive. Red Bull might be paying you well but not well enough to afford an apartment in a country as expensive as Monaco.
“I want you close,” he tells you. If you did not know any better, you'd have butterflies fluttering in your intestines right about that moment. Sometimes, Max utter the most heart-fluttering of nonsense without meaning to. It causes your heart to stutter more times than you would like to admit.
“Well, I don't want you close.”
Max will never ever win an argument with you. He knows that. You know that. The best he can do is come to a compromise, a compromise that is usually tailored to suit whatever you want.
So you got that small loft apartment a building away, good for one person only. It's easy to clean and it's cheap, Max already said that, which makes you happy because you can set a payment plan for that. An apartment as a Christmas gift is already too much, borderline giving you a heart attack already. Rich people spending their money give you, a person of the middle class folks, heart attacks. Why can't Max be normal and give you a normal gift? A bracelet? A bag? You’ll even accept it if he gave you a slice of cheesecake. Not even your parents can buy you an apartment.
It has only been three years since the keys are passed on to your ownership and people say three years is enough time for a person to make a place home. But your apartment doesn't even feel like home, only a place you’ll sleep in if you happen to be in Monaco for the evening.
Home is that humble, two-storey house painted in red and yellow in Lynnwood Avenue, Vista Del Pueblo, Austin, a total picture of a picket fence dream. Home is Abuelo's old farmhouse in El Paso where you spent your childhood riding horses and driving ATVs across the dusty dry earth. Home is the retro milkshake place owned by the sweet old couple that has been in the neighborhood longer than your entire existence. Home is the tree-lined streets where you walked the family senior dog, Niko. Home is the Austin Fire House, your Dad’s workplace that you visited a handful of times back when you were a child to deliver cookies that your Abuela baked so your Dad could share it with his co-workers. Home is your mom’s clinic in the middle of downtown, always smelling like eugenol, disinfectant, formaldehyde, and her perfume. Home is not glitz and gold and glamor and cash cash cash. Home is not seeing wealthy people left and right. Home is not Monaco.
And it is not like you stayed long in your place either. You're always off traveling around the world with the Red Bull team and accompanying Max wherever he needs your presence. You don't even spend your breaks in that apartment because you immediately fly home to your family once a break is graciously given to you before flying off again to watch Max collect trophy after trophy.
Six days from now, you're going to be flying off to Texas. That means you have six days—less than six days actually—to pack all your crayons and go. Of course you're going to pack up the day before you leave. Doing shit last minute makes your life exciting, and it's not like you had a lot of shit to pack anyway. All your belongings can be tucked into a total of three suitcases. Three years worth of belongings in three suitcases.
you: you doin good there?
Max has been holing himself up in his penthouse since your arrival from Abu Dhabi, probably dealing with his breakup with Kelly. A shame, really. You thought the two looked good together. (Do they really? the asshole part of your brain thinks.)
And P. Thank God for that child’s existence. You hate children but P is an exception. P brings the best out of Max. Max has gotten the chance to act as the father he never had. It's heartwarming, to be honest.
him: not really no
him: can you bring me coffee
you: on it champ
Fifteen minutes later, you’re knocking on the gigantic double doors of his penthouse, a tall styro cup of espresso from that cute café two streets down and a slice of blueberry cheesecake because you’re thoughtful enough to buy him his favorite cake. You experienced a breakup before. A cake and an icecream work wonders when it came to healing broken hearts.
“You're fast,” he immediately says after opening the door. You kind of expect that he’d look worse, snotty and messy and looking like he ran from hell and back. But no, he looks……fine? His sweater and shorts look absolutely neat and comfortable and dry of snot. His hair is a little fluffy from lying on his bed but not too messy. He doesn't even look like he was crying. No red-rimmed eyes. No red nose.
You fake gasp, putting a hand on your chest for additional dramatic effect, “The fastest racer in F1 callin’ me fast. Truly honored.”
A smile plays on his lips, sidestepping and beckoning you in.
You frequently come by Max’s home, for work purposes of course, but you still cannot help but be amazed by the enormity of it every time you enter. Max’s penthouse is twenty times bigger than the apartment you currently live in. One man and a big house—it must be very lonely now that P and Kelly are no longer around. Now, you’re even more worried about what will happen the moment you go back to Texas.
Oh… You still haven't told him yet.
“Coffee,” you hand him the warm styro cup to which he accepts gratefully. He utters his thanks, taking a whiff before sipping, letting out a pleasured moan.
You make your way to his gigantic kitchen, navigating your way through his cabinets in search of a plate and a fork. You slide the cheesecake on the plate towards Max, who followed you to the kitchen and sat on the empty stool in the kitchen counter.
“Thank you,” he says, picking up the fork and taking a bite. He glances at your feet, eyes trained on your YSL. The obnoxious sound of the heels clicking against the floor as you walk probably is the one that caught his attention.
“You know, you've been wearing the same shoes since 2019.”
Points for Max for noticing. These YSL Opyum heels are the first luxury items you bought for yourself after saving for three years to buy one pair. You saw a rich international student wear it once back in university and you liked how sophisticated it looked compared to all the pairs of converse or platform boots you owned. So you made it your life’s goal to own one. In 2019, after doing tons of part time jobs in university and working with Red Bull for a whole year, you managed to buy yourself one on your birthday and you’d been wearing them to work ever since.
Your regular work uniform consists of a Red Bull polo shirt, a pencil or a slit skirt, and that specific pair of heels. Around 2021, you bought another pair to replace the old one because the old one broke. And 2022 again.
“What's wrong with ‘em?” you ask, brows furrowing as you followed his train of sight. Your heels might be a year old already but they still look fine.
Max blinks, “No, there's nothing wrong. Just…Do you think you would want to wear some other design?”
“No,” is your reply. “I like ‘em just the way they are.”
“Okay.”
Your conversation drifts into something else as Max finishes his coffee and cake. You spend the rest of the day in Max’s penthouse, lying on his plush couch while a slasher movie from the 2000s played on his wide TV. He has given you access on his Netflix account so you abused it to your heart’s content because you don't even have. a Netflix subscription. You can absolutely afford one, you just choose not to. You have opted in using your phone mid-movie because the movie is beginning to get real scary but you do not want Max to think you're a coward so you acted like you're disinterested instead.
“Oh look, Charles is also back in Monaco. Do you want to hang out together?” you nudge Max with your foot, who swats it away from him, face contorting in disgust. You show him the post on Charles private IG—yes, you were mutuals in each other's private IG because whoever is friends with Max was friends with you by extension—on your phone.
“Stop makin’ that face, my feet are nice.”
Your toenails are a glorious red now. Ferrari red actually and they suit you better than the Red Bull red. Huh, maybe you should have considered applying for Ferrari instead of Renault in 2018.
“No, it isn't.”
You roll your eyes, pulling it away from him and sitting up, “Do you want me to schedule you a dinner with Charles? You might need the bro time, you know? Dad said bro times are also important, but not as important as family time, of course. My bro broke up with his sweetheart back when I was still in uni and his best buds were the reason he was back up in tippy top shape by the end of the week.”
Max stares at you blankly, “I think I understand the words individually but not the sentence entirely. I don't know if it's the accent or you Americans just have a strange way of structuring your sentences.”
“Point is, hang out with a friend because a friend can help you move on from a pussy.”
Max hurls a throw pillow at your direction, which you luckily avoided thanks to your non-racer level but still considerably good reaction time, but unfortunately, this action causes your center of gravity to shift and before you know it, you're falling from the couch. Unconsciously, you grab Max but then Max doesn't expect that you’ll grab him so now, you’re both falling off the couch and onto the floor.
You groan.
“Fuckin’ ass, man. That was uncalled for.”
He flips you off.
Nevertheless, Max ends up following your advice though and calls Charles to hang out the next day. Lestappen fans should be thanking you on Twitter the next day for bringing those two together on an off-day in Monaco. Maybe they'll hang out and eat together in a restaurant? Maybe they'll go on a yacht picnic?
Except Max sends you a message at high noon.
him: sos
you: is your kitchen burning
him: no
him: but this is still an emergency and you need to come quick
him: he’s with his girlfriend and i don’t want to thirdwheel
you: succ it up
him: you can’t do this to me
him: i just got my heart broken in abu dhabi
you: where are you
him: home
him: i also need help in cooking
Charles is the one who answers the door when you knock. He looks genuinely surprised when he sees you and you deduce that Max hasn't told him that you're coming over.
“Babe, who’s that?” you hear Alex’s voice behind Charles and you light up immediately, quickly moving past Charles to throw your hands around the sweet young woman.
“Alex!” Alexandra laughs and hugs you back. The sound of her laughter is as pretty as she and God definitely has favorites because why did he sculpt this twenty-one year old like the daughter of the Aphrodite while you look like you were born from one of Hephaestus’ sperm that lost the gene pool contest? The world is unfair. You always get the short end of the stick, may it be career-wise or appearance-wise, and you can't even bring your personality to the table because normally, without the whole act of professionalism and sophistication you put on, you act like an extroverted American frat boy on a good day and a sassy drag queen slash war freak on a bad day so yeah, you guess that's the short end of the stick, too.
“Seriously?” you look up and saw Max holding a frying pan, staring at you unimpressed. You roll your eyes and slowly pull away from the hug, gaze returning to Alexandra.
“How’ve you been, sweetie? Been a while since I last saw you.”
You didn't get a chance to talk to her in Abu Dhabi and in Las Vegas.
“Good,” she replies, smiling sweetly and ugh, you want to pinch her cheeks so bad. But Charles is pulling you away from Alexandra before you can do so.
“No, no, she is mine, yours is right over there,” Charles says, pointing at Max, who's still standing there in the corner. “Go on. Shoo.”
You roll your eyes before walking up to Max, “‘Sup?”
Max raises a brow at you, “So Charles’ girlfriend gets a hug and I get a sup?”
“Well, she's Alexandra Saint Mleux and you’re just….” you look him up and down. “Nevermind, what you trynna cook?”
“I haven’t decided yet.”
“I thought you said you were cooking.”
“I said I needed help with cooking.”
Your eyes narrow into slits, “You’re going to let me do the cooking, aren't you?”
“You know that pasta you made in September that you said was your mother’s recipe?”
A sigh escapes your lips as you roll the sleeves of your button-up to your elbows and power-walked your way to the kitchen, the sound of your YSL heels clicking against the floor bouncing against the walls of Max’s kitchen.
Lunch goes great. Charles and Alexandra love your cooking. Max has even asked for seconds. Good to know that he's eating well. Somewhere down the line, champagne is served even though it’s mid-afternoon and the four of you're sitting in Max’s balcony, staring at Monaco scape below. Thankfully, it is a cloudy day in Monaco. The heat of the sun isn't too harsh on the skin. Despite that, you hand Max a sun screen.
“Sorry about Kelly, by the way,” Alexandra says. Your conversation has drifted towards Max’s failed relationship now.
“That is very nice of you to say,” replies Max, smiling slightly. “But I’m okay.”
You give him a look, clearly unconvinced. Admitting vulnerability gives him hives so he's definitely lying.
“You look too okay for a guy who ended a three-year relationship,” Charles muses and his words get you immediately thinking.
Oh? So they’ve been dating that long? You never noticed.
“Even [Name] looked worse when she broke up with that Williams mechanic two years ago and they dated for like what? Barely a year?”
“Unprovoked!” you exclaim. Alex and Max laugh.
But yeah, Charles is right. When you broke up with Leo in 2021, it was not the prettiest sight. He entered Williams mid-2020 as a mechanic and he immediately caught your attention. He's kind and handsome and a very sweet guy. You have similar interests—engineering—and a similar sense of humor and you just….work so well together, you know? You were sure he was your soulmate the moment he cracked up that Physics pickup line and you know it was the same with him. You swore to God that you’d run away from all the British charming assholes but Leo made you eat your own words and gave you a run for your money.
But alas, 2021 season came and Red Bull Racing became busier than ever because Max and Hamilton got crazily competitive and Max demanded your full attention, needing you as a support system to win.
And Leo. Well, he’s busy, too. Engineers are always busy. But he felt neglected because all your attention was on Max. He felt like he was competing with Max for your attention and it shouldn't even be a competition in the first because Leo was the boyfriend and Max was not. And you cannot even deny that you prioritized Max that year. You wanted Max to win. You needed Max to win, so he can finally ask Horner to move you to the engineering team.
Losing Leo is devastating but Max won the WDC title that year and while you spent nearly a month crying over Leo after the breakup, you're hoping that at least, in 2022, you’ll finally get that damned engineering position at the cost of losing your soulmate. That the tears you shed and the broken heart you carried inside your ribs will be worth it if it was in exchange for your dream. Then, it does not happen. The job isn't given to you and you spent the early months of the 2023 season wishing that you have chosen Leo instead of Max Verstappen.
“You’re still friends with him, right?” Charles turns to you.
“Of course,” you say honestly. You're still mutuals on IG and he still hearts your IG stories at times. You still talk, too, on the freer nights where there's a lot of time to waste. “We ended on good terms.”
“How about you, Max?”
“Can we not talk about this please?”
The four of you empty that bottle of champagne and once the sun has begun retiring for the night, Alex and Charles also left. You're soon to follow, fixing your tote bag and going through the mental checklist in your head so you will not forget anything and not waste energy returning here to pick it up.
“You can stay for dinner.”
Max’s offer surprises you.
“No.”
His face drops as quickly as your answer came.
“You're goin’ to let me cook again.”
“No, I’ll cook.”
You give him an unimpressed look. Clearly, you're not convinced.
“I swear, I’ll cook.”
“What if I get poisoned?”
“You won't get poisoned.”
When you continue staring at him, he sighs.
“Just stay please?”
Of course, you stayed. He asked after all.
You keep your eyes on him as he makes dinner with clumsy hands and a bit of unsureness behind his actions.
“You're goin’ to burn it, honey,” you point out.
“What honey? I didn't put any honey in it.”
You blink. He blinks back.
“You’re gonna give me aneurysm one day.”
Shaking your head, you walk into the bathroom at the end of the enormous hallway, lock the door behind you, lean your back against the door, and slowly slides down until your ass meets the cold bathroom floor. You slap a palm against your forehead and purse your lips to stop a scream from erupting.
God fucking dammit, Max is too adorable back there and this is not doing good things for your heart.
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torakowalski · 3 months ago
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Apols for the delay but Swimmer Steve is back and pretty much exactly where we last left him.
(part one | part six)
"Fuck," says Steve. "Fuck." He hasn't said much of anything else since he came out of the changing rooms, still damp and kind of stunned-looking.
"Fuck," Eddie agrees.
Steve looks at him, a smile starting to spread across his face, going on and on like it might be endless.
God, he's handsome.
God, Eddie is stupid in love with him.
"Olympics, baby!" Eddie crows. They've already hugged; Steve got a hug from everyone, as soon as he emerged. Eddie wants to hug him again, but that would probably be too much.
"Fuck," says Steve and sits down on the floor between their two beds.
Eddie shrugs to himself and sits down with him.
They've only come back to the hotel so Steve can get showered and changed before the celebration dinner that the kids have planned. Or, actually, Steve has come back to the hotel for that; thinking about it, Eddie's not sure why he came with, except that it just felt natural.
Either way, looks like they're going to take longer than expected.
"All good?" Eddie asks, just in case.
"Jesus Christ," says Steve, which is a change from fuck and laughs. He lifts his hands up to cover his face and when he lowers them again, his eyes are wet. "The Olympics, Eddie."
Eddie nods, can't do anything but smile stupidly back at him. He doesn't think he's ever seen Steve this open and relaxed and delighted. "The Olympics, Steve."
Steve rubs at his eyes with his fingertips, mostly just making his eyelashes damper and darker from his happy tears. "You know when you've wanted something your whole damn life, but you never really thought you'd get it? It feels fucking wild to get it."
Eddie thinks about his guitar, his band, how badly he wants to stand on a stage looking out at thousands of people who all want to hear what he has to sing. Then he reminds himself that this is Steve's moment.
"I bet," he says. "Congrats. You've worked damn hard and you absolutely deserve it."
Steve leans over and bumps their shoulders together. "You're coming with me, right?"
Eddie blinks. "Where?"
"... the Olympics," says Steve, like it should be obvious.
Eddie blinks some more. "Steve. Sweetheart. Steve. The Olympics are in Korea."
"Mm," Steve agrees, "but the war's over, it's totally safe there now."
Eddie loves and hates that Steve thinks that might be the only thing putting Eddie off.
Eddie stretches his legs out so they disappear under Steve's bed and hopes there's nothing really gross under there that'll stick to his jeans. "Look, the literal only reason I've been able to afford rocking up and down the country with you is government hush money and the fact you keep buying all my meals. There's no way I can stretch to plane tickets, and I'd need my own hotel room, right? 'cause you'll be living in the athletes village?"
He could have kept going, obviously he could have kept going, but he stops there because Steve is waving a hand at him.
"What? Don't say you'll pay. There's no way you have that much extra cash, either."
"Nah," Steve says, "but my dad does. And I will be fully, fully back on the credit card, after he finds out about this."
Eddie makes a face. "But we hate your dad?"
"We really do," Steve agrees, smile not even dimming. "But we love spending his money on shit he'll hate." He drops a hand to Eddie's knee, giving it a squeeze and a shake. "You'll come, right?"
"... You should take Robin," Eddie tries, one last attempt to be a good person. "Or the kids. God, the kids would shit."
Steve leaves his hand on Eddie's knee, like that's just a place where it goes now. "I'd take them all, if I could... Plus like, all their parents to keep an eye on them, but they'll all be back in school by the time the Olympics start. None of them can take like, three weeks out."
"I bet Erica could wrangle it," Eddie points out.
Steve makes a guilty face. "Love Erica, but I don't think we have the kind of relationship where we hop over to Asia, just the two of us. You know?"
Eddie wants to ask, And we do? But they do. He knows they do.
"I don't know," he says. It's a big fucking deal. He's never left the country before and he'd love to, but he really does hate Steve's dad and all he chooses to be. The idea of being beholden to him for that big a favour sits wrong in his gut, even if Mr Harrington never actually knows about it.
"Eddie," Steve says, like he's prepared to wheedle for what he wants. Then he stops, takes a breath, shakes his head. "I know it's a big ask and obviously you don't have to, if you really don't want to. I kind of just, I can't, I can't imagine doing this without you."
Eddie claps a hand to his chest. "Right in the flattery gland, Harrington."
Steve slides his hand up Eddie's leg and squeezes his thigh. Is this going to be a thing? Is Eddie going to have to get Robin to have a word with him about this soon?
"You're the whole reason I've got this far," Steve tells him, all close and sincere. "If you don't want to come, that'll suck, but it's okay. I just wanna make sure that you know I appreciate everything you've done."
Eddie knows every mole on Steve's face, but Steve's close enough now to reveal a few previously unknown freckles.
Eddie chuckles weakly. "Personal space?" he suggests.
"Overrated," Steve says and then.
And then.
And then he presses his lips carefully against Eddie's.
"What?" Eddie croaks. He can feel his breath dance off Steve's mouth.
"Thank you," Steve says and kisses him again, a little firmer, a little damper this time.
"I..." Eddie is a goddamn fucking hero because he makes himself lean back. "Don't. You can't. Don't kiss me to say thank you. That's not... Don't. Please."
He's expecting Steve to sit back, blush and apologise and explain he had to best of intentions. Instead, Steve lifts the hand not on Eddie's thigh and touches his cheek. "Can I kiss you 'cause I can't imagine not kissing you?"
The centre of Eddie's chest throbs. Even he doesn't know what that means. "You don't want to kiss me," he manages.
"Kinda really do," Steve says. "So? Can I?"
(continued here)
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kremlin · 9 months ago
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@wikwalker hi sure yes anything to give me an excuse to procrastinate the post i should be writing right now. here are all teh drugs and how to manage them. you can trust me, a drug addict
first of all: https://www.erowid.org/ , erowid always
don't be afraid of drugs, if they're the right drugs, you should do them since they will be a blast regardless and overcoming fear is also good (but outside the scope here)
OK to do as much as you want: alcohol - social benefit greatly outweighs health effects, no reason to avoid if predisposed to abuse since that'll happen sooner or later. what can i say? don't be a fucking dork. when you start drinking, really overdo it as much as possible without dying and get a few real nasty hangovers under your belt so you know how much is the right amount to drink.
weed - innocuous enough to be fine but will make you stupid in the long term. make sure to only buy from a real drug dealer and never some legal institution. cut it out when you're a "real adult". don't smoke weed and watch TV routinely, go out and do things so you naturally grow to hate it. good to go through this as early as possible to minimize the time you spend as a cringe weed enthusiast
i guess those are the only two.
ok to do infrequently (annually): "lsd" - or whatever it is, probably not lsd, blah blah blah, if it works and is sold on blotter its fine and won't make you go nuts or whatever. opt for a better psychadelic imo. see psych rule at bottom of section
mushrooms - better than acid since you know what they are. rule of thumb is to always do more than you think you want. minimum 1/8oz. see psych rule at bottom of post
dmt - if you somehow have a dmt hookup you don't need to be reading any of this. lasts 10 minutes which leads to tendency to way overdo it, don't do this, my favorite webcomic artist is permanently crazy from exactly that. using a crack pipe is also not the uhhhh most dignifying-feeling thing to do either. it's harder than you think.
mdma - for use at electronic music event or rave. overuse causes brain lesions or something.
coke - wait until you're in your 20s, have maxed out your roth IRA for a couple of years in a row, and havent missed a car payment in a similar timeframe. better still if you've worked a very shitty low paying job and know the value of a dollar. if you still find yourself buying candy you're not ready. too expensive to be worth it to get hooked on. know that you are VERY ANNOYING to anyone who also isn't high. don't fuck around with the guy selling it to you. avoid discussing or thinking about business ideas. you can't afford to make it a habit + kinda turns you into a piece of shit after a while, but at least a very interesting one
ketamine - another sick drug that rules, but save it for a special occasion. don't try and go into the k-hole your first time
rule for psychedelics - you get one good strong trip a year and that's it, make it count, always opt for doing a bit more than a bit less. but don't make it a habit, otherwise you turn into a very stupid very annoying "hippy" style cliché and believe in ghosts, aliens, crap like that.
ok to try once prescription opiates/benzodiazepine (xanax), valium, this kind of shit - worth trying so you can go "holy shit, this stuff is way way way too good to ever use responsibly" and then never do again. especially if you're white. for some reason we just can't handle this shit. if a doctor prescribes it to you, idk, that's your call to make.
ayhuasca - this is just dmt in a different form. do some other psychadelics a number of times before you do this. once you realize the whole "substantial visual hallucinations" thing is made up, its time. do exactly this: -buy root online (legal). receive box of dirt -boil dirt into "tea" (read erowid for exact recipe) -take over-the-counter anti nausea medicine or anything that will give you a stronger stomach -drink tea (its nasty as fuck, get it down quick) -have someone bigger than you keep an eye on you for the next five hours. -have the experience, which is absurdly intense, has no bearing to the real world, etc etc. don't be a bitch and throw up, if you do it'll only last an hour or so. again there is no way to provide a consistent description of the experience except that you will meet god. you only ever need to do this once and never again. trust me
peyote/salvia/etc - try em if you want, you'll never ever want to again afterwords. these are drugs for idiot teenagers too lame to get real drugs. imagine being very very sick from poison and utterly terrified at the same time. No good
whippets/nitrous oxide - just find a dentist that uses it and don't bother creating hundreds of pounds of trash on your floor for this crap that lasts ten seconds. you have to understand the extremely short timeframe coupled with the cost makes zero sense. go to a phish concert parking lot and do some people watching -- you do not want to be these people. only use is as a motivator to get routine dental exam. also if you somehow manage to make it a heavy habit your fucking legs stop working, no shit, but they start working again once you quit.
don't ever do heroin/meth/pcp - is is truly a mystery why you should never do these 🙄
synthetic weed/k2/shit from the gas station - it is so funny that they sell this as "weed that won't pop you on a drug test". its not weed. it is some dubious chemical sprayed on yard waste. smoke it to have a terrible time and go nuts. only buy drugs from legitimate drug dealers!
kratom - anyone's guess as to why this is legal but it's heroin for pussies. its still heroin
dxm/cough syrup - do you ever wonder why it is exclusively teenagers robotripping? it's because it sucks ass. is like a cheesegrater on your brain in terms of health effects with repeated usage. you're better than this king
inhalants - these are at the bottom of the list for a reason. do not huff gas. don't huff paint. do not consume computer duster. not fun + fastest way to make yourself a complete, uh, (word i can't say anymore) and then dead
not listed quaaludes- unavailable due to no longer being manufactured. these ruled apparantly
sincis2c - unavailable due to not existing, i just made this up
amphetamines - cannot provide objective take here. they're my albatross, lifelong (posted 4:55am natch)
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jenn-ieverse · 2 months ago
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୨ৎ. 🎧 𝇃𝄄ㅤ ઈㅤֵㅤN I K I ‹ ENHYPEN › ๋ ࣭ ⭑
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AFTER HOURS
PAIRING ʬʬ badboy¡niki + femalereader
TROUPE ʬʬ badboy x class president
WARNINGS ʬʬ (for this chapter) underage smoking, fl has a slight comical psychotic breakdown lol [she's just burnt-out],mentions of blood.
LIST ʬʬ prologue, 01
A/N ʬʬ Thank you so much for all your love in the prologue! I wasn't expecting it ♡ If you want to be a part of the unofficial taglist, comment ♡ Do read the prologue before reading this chapter!!
AFTER HOURS
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“Excuse me?” you led out an audible gasp, catching some judgemental looks from passersby. “What? You expect me to help you without anything in return?” he leans in cockily, sliding his phone out of your grip, for a moment your hands brush, leaving a sensation on your skin. “Can't you though? As a fellow classmate?” you look at him with puppy eyes, he laughs.
“Are you tryna act cute? Aegyo doesn't work on me.” he looks at you as if he finds your desperation amusing. “Ugh!” you groan with frustration, the remaining patience vanishing into thin air, “Look, here's the thing. My position is at risk, so whatever you want, if I can afford it, I'll give it to you but you have to help me out.” Niki frowns, “How is your position at risk?” he's got selective hearing too if that's the only part he caught out of the whole conversation.
“Forget it, forget I said that.” you look away, huffing. Niki pulls out a cigarette and lights it, “You don't mind right?” he motions towards the lit stick and you shake your head in response. You can feel him staring at you but you look everywhere but at him, “You need a drag? Looks like you need one.” you groan at his words, frustration bubbling inside you, so much so you think about talking a drag for once.
“It's that snitch bitch Kang Areum, you have no idea how betrayed I feel right now Niki.” and once you begin, it doesn't stop, “She goes on to hehe haha with her boyfriend, I am the one who always gave her my study notes and this is what she did to me?!” you didn't care if you were yelling, you just wanted it all out.
“She goes behind my back to that poor excuse of a homeroom teacher and tells him that she wanna be the class president, as if she can ever handle that, but the worst part? He would actually make her. And what about the shit I have gone through to get that place?” you grab your hair, letting out a sarcastic laugh, “You know what's even funnier? I should just throw these papers at you and get up and leave, instead I am sitting here buying you fucking band-aids!” You wave the empty box of band-aids in front of his face, now having let go of your hair.
“Feel better?” Niki ditches the rest of the cigarette and crushes it with his feet. You take a deep breath, your chest feeling lighter than before. Is this how it feels to let things out? “I don't know, maybe I should just let her-” Niki interrupts you. “I'll do it.” your eyes widen as if they'll pop out of your eye sockets. “Come again?” you sit up straight. “The form, I'll do it.” Niki shrugs nonchalantly.
“In return,” you lean in with full concentration, waiting for him to continue, “I want…” his words float off as he looks around, “Come on, say it.” you tap the table impatiently. “Friend.” he says with a suspicious smile, “Friend?” you repeat in confusion. “Yeah, you and me, friends. What say?” He twists his hands and does a handshake with himself, while emphasizing on ‘friends’ and you just eye him judgmentally.
“You and me, friends? Come on, that's like real sus, you know that.” you point it out, “Okay, how about I complete all the assignments I hadn't done since last two months, submit it and tell the homeroom teacher that you convinced me to do it.” he proposes, “My dear friend.” you take his hands in yours, “My best friend.” you give him the warmest smile you could, “That was easy.” He scoffs, amused.
“No but like really? You'd do that for me?” your expressions get serious, “Yeah. We are friends after all.” you felt like you were on cloud nine. “I bet Kang Areum can't top that now, can she?” you chuckle nodding, “You look evil.” Niki teases your tone. “Oh shut up. You can't make fun of me yet, we aren't that close.” you warn him with a glare that just makes him smile even more. Before he could say something in response your phone rings, “Yeah, what's wrong?” It was the class vice president, Heesung. “The council meeting?” Niki sits back and listens to every word you say, not knowing who's on the other side of the call.
“You attend it instead of me, what's the big deal Heesung?” Niki scoffs as soon he hears the name and gets up. You frown at him, he waves his pack of cigarettes and walks into a narrow alley beside the convenience store. You look at him leaning against the wall and lighting another cigarette before taking a quick drag, “Are you even listening to me?” Heesung's voice from the other side of the phone makes you quickly look away and refocus on the call.
“Look, I have some work to do alright so I won't be there-” you stop at the sounds of yelling as a couple approaches, “You cheated on me with my best friend and now you are gaslighting me?” the woman in her late 20s yells at the man beside her. “For God sakes, I am not gaslighting you!” the man yells back. You just wait for them to pass by but instead the woman stops a few feet away from you and grabs the man by his collar, “Stop lying you asshole.” the screaming and yelling intensifies.
You get and walk away into the alley. You nudge Niki to get further into the alley and make some space for you and so he does. “Is everything alright, I heard yelling.” Heesung says, now his voice on the call echoing in the narrow alley, you notice Niki looking away. “Yeah all good, listen, just attend the meeting and tell me the details tomorrow alright?” you are eager to cut the call and get out of this place because what you hadn't realized is that being in close proximity with Niki isn't a good idea after all. “But you were supposed to be here!” Heesung continues to complain, making you sigh.
“Yeah I know but-” you feel Niki nudging your feet with his, trying to distract you from your phone call. You pull the mobile away from your ear and cover the speaker with your other hand before speaking, “Just hold on a minute will you?” you glare at him hoping he would stop. “Cut the call would ya? I'm bored, come on.” a playful smirk linger on his lips as he leans in, towering over your height.
“Are you with someone?” You hear Heesung from the phone. Niki opens his mouth to say something but you clamp his mouth shut with your hand and place the phone back, next to your ear. “What? No, of course not! I'll talk to you first thing tomorrow alright? Okay bye.” you cut the call without waiting for the caller's response. You quickly realize how close he is standing to you, even if you try to step back, you won't be able to as your back was already pushed against the wall and so was his.
He slowly grabs your hand and removes it from his mouth. “So it's true that both of you are like, a thing.” Niki raises his eyebrow, tossing his burnt out cigarette away. The smell of thick smoke consumes you. “Me and Heesung?” your frown is followed by a laugh, “That rumor is ages old, nobody says that anymore.” you shrug, remembering how in 10th grade the rumor circulated because of a stupid incident. “I'll walk you home.” Niki grabs your wrist and pulls you out of the alley.
The fighting couple were long gone. Home, no, no, no. You pull your hand out of his grip, “You don't have to.” you try to refuse politely, “Isn't it like 10 minutes from here?” he points in the other direction. “How do you know?” You frown at him, “Just… guess.” he looks away, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck. “No, no need.” you refuse, firmly this time. He looks at you suspiciously, “Why are you acting weird?” he eyes you suspiciously.
“Leave.” you pick his bag and push it to his chest. “Don't you understand? Go away.” your words make him scoff, “Whatever weirdo, forget it.” he swings his bag over his shoulder and walks away. As you look at him going further into the distance. your phone rings again, Mother, flashes on the screen. I wish I could never go home. 
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“Alright, Yeonjun, back off now.” you stand with their arms extended horizontally to your sides, palms facing outward, signaling for both the students to stop. It was another morning, another chaos had ensued in the classroom. “How dare you throw your notebook at me?” Beomgyu yells, waving the notebook in the air. “I told you to not bother me, didn't I?” Yeonjun tries to charge at Beomgyu but you stop him.
“You guys seriously can't be fighting about this! Are you a bunch of preschoolers?” You say with exhaustion, “Well, he does act like a preschooler.” Beomgyu prompts, “Gyu stop provoking him!” you turn to the other classmate. “Or what? Is he gonna hit me?” Beomgyu challenges. “I might as well do it then.” you turn to your other side to see now Yeonjun had picked up a chair and was ready to throw. “No! Jun, put down the chair, alright?” You say slowly, motioning him to put the chair down.
“Y/N, I have had enough, move away or you are gonna get hurt.” he warns. “Look at him threatening the class pres. now!” Beomgyu continues to prompt. “Someone call the homeroom teacher!” Another student in class yells, and two other students run out to do so. “Yeonjun, look we can-” Yeonjun gives the chair a big swing, ready to throw, you close your eyes as a reflex as you hear a chain of gasping reactions run through the classroom.
When you slowly open your eyes, you see a familiar back in front of you. “Niki?” you move out from behind him to see he had grabbed a leg of the chair and slowly put it down. The students start to whisper amongst themselves at the unexpected scene. Your gaze falls on the blood oozing out of his palm. “Your hand!” you point out as Niki himself realizes he's bleeding. He must have cut himself from the edge of the chair leg. “I didn't do it! I swear! He grabbed it himself!” Yeonjun surrenders defensively. “Yo dude, why did you grab the chair?” Beomgyu says from behind.
“Alright, both of you, cleaning duty after school.” both Yeonjun and Beomgyu erupt in complaints and apologies at your order. “And you, come with me.” You grab Niki by his shirt sleeve and make your way to the infirmary. 
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You pour disinfectant over his wound as he winces with his hands stretched over the wash basin at the corner of the infirmary. “Why the hell did you do that?” you brought up the incident from before. “Why didn't you move?” he counter questions. “Because I know Yeonjun! He wasn't actually gonna hit!” you state the obvious, patting the wound dry before applying the medicine.
“Do you know how many times he has picked up a chair and swung it in the air, threatening to hit before putting it back down? He doesn't have it in him to actually hurt anybody.” Niki was at a loss of words so he would look everywhere but at you. “I've put the form along with the assignments on Mr. Choi's desk.” he finally says, you frown with confusion, “What? I thought… Why?” As far as you remember things did not end well yesterday, so you had assumed he wouldn't go through with the deal.
“Because you deserve to be the class president, no one knows them better than you do.” he says referring to the classmates. All you could do was nod knowingly but a part of you felt grateful. Maybe he isn't as bad as everyone thinks him to be, maybe you were too quick to judge. Maybe being his friend isn't so bad after all, “Look, about yesterday…” you say as you finish wrapping up his cut. “Maybe I was wrong.” he says instead, “Let's go back to being strangers.” you were dumbfounded at his words. “You were right, me and you being friends is quite strange.” he gets up from his seat. “No Niki, I…” he gets up and walks away without waiting for you to complete your sentence. 
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ʬʬ Taglist ʬʬ @d-dilemma @onementally-unstabel-kid thank you lovelies, hope you like it!
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icarusredwings · 1 month ago
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Thinking about Autistic Asexual Charles and how many times Hank, his unofficial caregiver just stands here like "Jesus christ Charles you're going to 'play chess' with Erik AGAIN? This is like.. the 5th time this week." And Charles, with the most smug expression just says "What can I say, Hank? I like chess. And I always win."
Only to see the look of concern on Hanks face as he's like "Well.. alright.. it's your life I guess."
And while yes, he could very easily just read his mind, he's learning that, that's quite rude to do so without invitation.
The thing is, though, Charles is a massive flirt, and honestly, I think it should be taken with a grain of salt. My man is a master of persuasion and has actively learned how to tell people what they want to hear to get his way when growing up, so now, as an adult, it seems charming and flirtatious. And yes, some of it IS flirtatious, but it's not the "What a lovely dress that is." Rather him just looking at Erik and saying "Precisely." With a smug smirk and heart eyes.
Certian words are for certain people. Hank gets certainly and exactly. Erik gets precisely and "Why, of course, my old friend."
This being said I love the idea of Hank coming to tell him that a student tattled on oppisite gendered students together in their room at night and Charles is like "okkaayy...?? And?"
Hank just rolls his eyes and is like "Charles-" and Charles is like, "OH- oh right. Gosh, I keep forgetting.." then rolls his own eyes. "Teenagers.."
Also, I love thinking about how Erik is so confused and so flustard by how WEIRD Charles flirts. He can be over here complimenting a ladies hair and buying drinks for her only to turn to Erik the moment they ask if he has anyone at home with a smooth "Not yet."
And Erik stands there like "???!!?? Does he mean me or her?" Only for Charles to lowkey abandon the woman and come to Erik like "I wanna go home now. Its boring here."
"Won't you be more bored in your massive mansion?"
"Not with you Magnus. I can't afford to be bored of you."
*Magnus brain malfuction Error code g a y ??!!?*
Charles just smirks that small shit eating grin he does and goes "Come now, Someone's gotta keep an eye on you and unfortunately Satan himself favors me."
Like WHAT is this poetry?? SIR!!!?? Romantic mother fucker.
"And I want a grilled cheese."
Magneto??? More like malewife.
Funny enough, they get there, and nothing happens. Charles gets his grilled cheese. They theoretically argue over how the perfect grilled cheese would be made, and Charles goes to bed. Erik leaves, afraid of what Charles might see in his head if he stays.
He's so afraid of ruining their friendship with these "sinful" thoughts but Charles waves him goodbye through the window just before he drives away- And Erik cant sleep that night.
Dozens of spare rooms. And none are big enough to keep his feelings behind locked doors, so he drives home. Stares at his ceiling. Wishing he'd only gather the courage to ask to stay..
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taeyongdoyoung · 1 year ago
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summary: things between you and your mom escalate and you make the impulsive decision to move in with your online friend who saves your life and shines like the brightest star... pairing: seonghwa x reader genre: angst, fluff, smut; online friends to roommates+lovers warnings: swearing, mommy issues, suicidal thoughts, insecurities, crying, pet names, eating out, blowjob, protected sex, praise kink, mommy kink, one (1) bad star wars joke, the nbhd references, subspace (kinda?), lowkey possessive hwa, one bed trope (but there is a couch, they just ignore it) author's note: this is incredibly personal and i felt so vulnerable while writing it but i better post it real quick before i chicken out 🙃 the title is inspired by the neighbourhood's daddy issues (remix) even though reader has mommy issues lol word count: 4.3k
You are cooped up in your room, physically shaking. You have no tears left to cry so you are laughing hysterically at the absurdity of it all. You were so tired of it. You love your mom, you really do. You would never do anything to harm her. But you are absolutely sick of the way she was treating you. Always belittling your interests, not letting you go out past a certain hour even though you were old enough to do so, yelling at you for the smallest mistakes, suffocating you with her unrealistic expectations, saying you were stupid and would never amount to anything if it hadn't been for her strict parenting style, even though you had practically sacrificed your mental health and social life to get high grades. And whenever you brought up all the ways in which she'd hurt you, she would try to gaslight you and pull shit like: "I never said that." "You're being overdramatic." "You're so ungrateful." All your friends said you deserved better. They tried their best to support you emotionally. But words could only do so much. You need out. If you stayed another moment in this toxic environment, you felt like you would do something terrible to yourself. Something there was no coming back from.
The only person you feel like talking to right now was your online friend Seonghwa. You'd met him on a Star Wars forum eight months ago and you'd been talking to each other pretty much every free minute. He was your light in the darkness and brought you so much happiness you couldn't remember what your life before him had been like. He always knew just what to say and comforted you like nobody else could. And when you didn't feel like talking, he distracted you successfully by organizing streaming sessions for the two of you. He is, for lack of a better word, perfect. There is only one downside. He lives thousands of kilometres away from you.
You: Talk to me. About anything. Please? Starshine98: What happened??? You: I don't wanna talk about it. I don't even wanna think about it. Starshine98: Got it. Your mom, right? You: Is my tragic existence so transparent? Starshine98: Whatever she said, you know it's not your fault. You: I know. But Hwa…it hurts so much I feel like dying. I can't do this anymore. Starshine98: Don't say that. You are so important to me. And to your friends. And to your mom, as well, even if she has a messed up way of showing it. You: Still….I need to get out of here as soon as possible but I can't do that without getting a stable job first. And it's so hard to find one. Starshine98: What if you came to live with me? My apartment has enough space for two… You: You live across the world? I can't even afford a plane ticket. Starshine98: Don't worry about money, I'll send you an E-ticket. You: I can't ask you to do that… Starshine98: You're not asking, I'm offering. You're going through something traumatic and you obviously need a change of scenery. I'm not asking you to stay with me forever, just for as long as you need to take care of your mental health. Just say the word and I'll buy the ticket. You: This is far too generous of you. Starshine98: I'm not as selfless as you think. I'm so worried about your well-being that keeping an eye on you myself would help me sleep better at night. You: Sweet. Starshine98: So? What do you say? You: Fuck it. Let's do this.
A couple of minutes later you receive a digital plane ticket from Seonghwa. The feeling of staring at it is so surreal you feel like you might pass out. You quickly pack only the bare essentials into a bag and scribble a letter to your parents. You know your mom will be furious and your dad will be worried sick but still, you want to leave the apartment while she's still asleep to avoid the confrontation. This is the best decision you could have possibly made in this situation. And for the first time in forever, you are finally doing something impulsive, something crazy without asking for permission. And damn, does it make you feel alive.
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As you get off the plane, your eyes scan the airport for Seonghwa. You debate turning on your phone but then you would be faced with missed calls from your parents and right now, you are not ready to face the reality of what you've done. Luckily enough, you quickly spot a large sign with your name on it. It's him! You rush through the crowd and directly into his arms. He drops the sign in disbelief and gives you the tightest hug possible. This is insane. You can't believe you're actually here.
"Hi, sweet girl," Seonghwa says and his voice sound even lovelier than during the video chats you've had with him.
"Hi, starshine," you chuckle nervously.
"How was your flight?" he asks.
"Couldn't wait for it to be over," you admit.
"Yeah? You wanted to see me that bad?" Hwa teases you.
"More like couldn't wait to visit Seoul," you joke. "Go sightseeing."
"Sorry to disappoint but I'm taking you home first."
Home. You liked the sound of that.
"This is my room, this is the living room, this is the kitchen and this is the bathroom. Any questions?" Seonghwa inquires after he's done showing you around his apartment.
"Um, not to sound ungrateful but…where will I…you know, sleep?" you ask.
"My room, obviously. I'll take the couch in the living room," Hwa shrugs.
"What? No, Hwa, I can't…this is your apartment. I would feel so guilty I wouldn't fall asleep at all."
"Do you have another suggestion?"
"Duh! I will sleep on the couch!"
Seonghwa shakes his head, visibly distressed by the idea.
"It's pretty cold in the living room. You'll be more comfortable in my room."
"Well…we could share the bed, then? You do have a king size. If…that's okay with you."
"Are you sure?" Hwa wants to know.
You nod without thinking too much into it.
"You're my best friend and I just moved across the world. Sharing a bed with you does not worry me."
"Alright. Let me know if you need anything, I'll try to get it for you."
"Right now I just need a hug."
Seonghwa abides by your wishes and soon enough, the two of you find yourselves cuddling under the warm blanket. Minutes later you are crying and spilling the beans about your latest fight with your mom. When you tell him the whole story, he feels like throwing up.
"H-how could she say that to her own d-daughter?" Hwa stammers in disbelief.
You notice tears falling down his beautiful cheeks and trace a finger against his skin.
"Honestly? I'm kinda used to it. But it was so bad I couldn't take it anymore."
"You're not supposed to. You're a literal angel, I don't understand her behaviour at all."
You give him a sad smile.
"I'm not a saint, either. I mean, I've kept secrets from her and stuff. I just wish things could get resolved by communicating but she always refuses to hear my side of the story."
"The only reason why you've kept secrets was to protect your sanity. She's being unreasonable for not letting you follow your passions. What kind of a parent would say such harmful things?"
"Right?" you laugh bitterly. "You get me like no one else."
Seonghwa strokes your hair lovingly and kisses your forehead.
"My darling girl. You deserve so much better."
"Sometimes I wish you were my mom," in a moment of intense vulnerability, you murmur without thinking but the words are already out of your mouth and it's too late to take them back.
"W-what?" Hwa appears taken aback.
"S-sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me," you cover your face with your hands.
"Say it again. Please."
You take a peek nervously. His reaction is not one of disgust as you feared but rather…curiosity?
"I wish you were my mom," you repeat, your cheeks flushed with color.
"Do you know what I'd do if I were your mom?" Seonghwa asks.
You shake your head, desperately needing to hear what he's thinking.
"If you were my little girl, I'd do whatever I could do to keep you safe and protect you, make sure no one could hurt you, least of all me. I'd let you follow your passions. If you went out at night, I'd be worried sick, of course, but I'd be happy you're having fun with your friends. I'd tell you I'm proud of you no matter what grades you got. If you kept secrets from me, I wouldn't yell at you, but I'd ask myself what I did wrong. You know why? Because I trust you. And I care about you so deeply that I'd like to win your trust, too."
Your vision is blurry with tears. You feel like Hwa just fixed something he didn't break. Whatever he has to offer, you want all of it.
"I'd like that very much."
"You'd let me take care of you? Call you mine?" Seonghwa needs to know.
"Yes, please."
"My precious girl," he purrs in your ear.
"Hwa…just to be clear, what does that make us?" you ask, confused about the line between friendship and…whatever this is.
"What do you want us to be? Girlfriend and boyfriend? Daughter and…mom? Friends with benefits?"
You chuckle at the variety of labels he suggests.
"I think I'd like to be your girlfriend. If you'll have me," you blink, suddenly feeling insecure. You don't have much to offer. But whatever little you have, you're willing to give to him.
"I will. And I'd be honoured to be your boyfriend."
You bury your head into his chest, overwhelmed with positive feelings and excitement for the future that awaits the two of you.
"Let me take you out on a date tomorrow. But first, you need sleep."
"Okay, mom," you laugh wholeheartedly. "Will you sing me a lullaby?"
"Anything for my best girl," Seonghwa promises.
The following day he takes you to a really lovely date at a local restaurant and treats you so well, like no one else before in your life. You feel so blessed and lucky to have met him that there are not enough words to describe how grateful you are to him. Not just for letting you move in with him without expecting anything in return (though that was an immensely generous gesture on his side). The reason you are grateful the most is that he accepts you with all your flaws and scarred past, he shows you such understanding and care you have only dreamed about. He is truly your shining star guiding your path through the dark and into the light.
In the evening, you finally muster up the courage to turn on your phone. You call your dad and with tears in your eyes, explain the circumstances around your latest fight with your mom and why you decided to move in with Seonghwa. Your dad is worried, of course, but he says he gets why you did it, as he has witnessed some encounters when your mom has said hurtful things to you. Though he has not explicitly stood up for you, in your private conversations, he has shown you support and eagerly awaited the day you were independent from her. He tells you your mom was furious at first but now she is just…sad. You promise you will talk to her when you feel ready but for the time being, you need some space. Your dad respects your decision and you hang up.
"You did well," Seonghwa praises you, enveloping you in a warm hug.
"Thanks," you whisper sadly.
"Shall we go to bed?" he asks.
"Aw, man, I was in such a hurry to pack that I forgot my favourite frog plushie!" you exclaim in annoyance. "I can't sleep without it."
"Last night you had no trouble falling asleep, though?" Seonghwa gently reminds you.
"You're right!" you cry out in amazement.
"I'll get you a million plushies tomorrow but for now you'll have to settle for me."
"You know what? You're more than enough. You're my favourite plushie from now on!" you smile, wrapping your arms around his waist.
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You've had the happiest week of your life. Seonghwa shows you around the city, taking you to adorable cafés, sightseeing and eating ramen by the Han river. The two of you take tons of pictures together and spend a lot of quality time. He even introduces you to his friend San and convinces him to let you work at his bookshop, which is honestly a dream job.
One morning, you wake up feeling uncharacteristically hot. Something hard is pressed against your ass. Could that be…You freeze at the realization. You wonder whether to rush out of bed. But then you risk Seonghwa waking up and you don't want him feeling embarrassed over something completely natural. You could pretend you're still asleep? But your breathing is too irregular and your skin is practically on fire. What should you do? Before you can make up your mind, you feel Seonghwa shifting behind you and the space has never felt emptier.
"I'm sorry," he mumbles sleepily.
"What are you sorry for?" you ask even though the answer is quite apparent.
"For…you know, getting hard."
"It's fine, it's a normal human reaction."
"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable or objectified. I mean…you are hot and I've obviously thought about you before in impure ways but…I like you so much I don't want you to feel pressured or anything. You're incredibly special to me, baby."
You finally turn around to face him.
"You are the most precious person in my life, Seonghwa," you whisper. "And like, if you want me, I'm all yours. No pressure."
"But…wouldn't you want to wait longer?" he asks cautiously.
"Whenever you want, my star," you smile eagerly, hoping he takes the bait.
"Fuck it," Hwa mutters under his breath and crashes his lips into yours.
You kiss him back impatiently and bury your fingers into his soft hair. He pulls you closer to him by the waist, digging his fingers into your lower back.
"If you want to stop at any moment, just let me know, okay?" Seonghwa breaks the kiss to reassure you.
You are so touched by his words that tears are already welled up in your eyes.
"Okay. Same goes for you."
"Trust me, darling, I wouldn't want to stop," Hwa promises and buries his head into your neck, inhaling the scent of you.
He spends a long time pressing kisses everywhere he could think of: your neck, your cheeks, your hair, your nose, your collarbones, your tummy, your ears, your thighs until finally, he reaches your pussy. Guiding your legs apart with a gentle but firm hand, you are afraid of melting right there. He eats you out hungrily, his ridiculously long tongue doing wonders to your senses. Needing something to hold on to, you tug on his hair, hopeful that you are not hurting him. He starts making circular motions, increasing the pleasure. It does not take you long to finish, completely falling apart.
"I think I just died a little," you admit, laughing.
"Well, the French did call it la petite mort," Seonghwa shrugs.
"Ah, yes. The little death," you smile, fondly recalling your French classes. "I wouldn't be a good guest if I didn't return the favour, no?"
You wrap your lips around the head of his cock, looking up at him to see if you're doing a good job.
"You're not a guest. I want you to feel at home," Seonghwa says and you try to take him deeper into your mouth. "You don't have to- Oh!"
You smirk as you swirl your tongue against his cock, doing your best to bring him closer to the edge.
"Such a good girl. My girl, yes?" he murmurs.
You can't verbablly respond so you nod your head frantically. Your hand is wrapped around the part of him you can't physically fit in and you blink the tears away, attempting to focus on breathing through your nose. You move your head and up down, desperately staring into his eyes to make sure he's enjoying every second of it. Soon enough, he reaches his high, sending ropes of cum down your throat. You try to swallow, not waste any drop of it.
Seonghwa strokes your cheek with his hand.
"You did so great for me," he praises you and you feel butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
"T-thank you," you stutter nervously.
"You don't have to thank me," Seonghwa chuckles in confusion and flips you around so that you are lying on your back. He leans down and kisses you again even more sensually than before but with as much tenderness. "You wanna stop?"
"No, please, don't stop," you are not too proud for begging.
"M'kay, lemme just grab protection real quick and I'll be back," he grins.
"Oh, I feel quite protected with you by my side, but I get what you mean," you tease him, excited to take the next step in your relationship.
True to his promise, Hwa returns moments later, flexing a condom in his hand.
"Protection," he repeats in a cute voice, while he puts it on.
"And here I thought you were gonna show me your lightsaber," you joke.
Seonghwa dramatically places a hand on his heart, feigning offense.
"I already did," he plays along and you can't stop yourself from bursting into laughter.
God, he really is the best guy in the universe. Your thoughts are further confirmed when he slowly teases your entrance with just the tip, making sure you are okay.
"You good? Should I go deeper?"
"Hwa, my angel, you can do anything to me and chances are I'd like it," you reassure him confidently.
"Careful what you wish for," Seonghwa smirks and slides in, making you feel so full and complete.
"Ngh," your sweet little cries are enough to give him the needed push to not hold himself back any longer. He fucks into you with so much vigour and passion you are on the verge of disintegrating.
"My gorgeous girl. You like that?"
"Yes, mommy," the words slip out of your mouth before you could think twice about it. His movements come to a sudden halt, causing you to realize what you've just said. Out loud. Ugh, you feel equally mortified and turned on.
"Mommy, huh?" he chuckles lightly.
"S-sorry," you hide your face behind your palms.
"It's okay, I can be your mommy," Seonghwa grabs your wrists and pushes your hands above your head. "I'll take good care of you, yeah? Wish you could see yourself, my most precious girl."
"Hwa, please, I mean…mommy, need you so badly," you stumble through your words weakly.
"I'm right here, my sweet baby, I'll give you what you need," he plays along. "Does mommy's cock feel good inside you?"
"S-so g-good, mommy, thank you, thank you so much," it hasn't even been that long and you already feel fucked out, utterly and irreversibly at his mercy.
"Don't thank me, dearest, I'm just treating you the way you deserve," Seonghwa vows and before you know it, you are clenching around his cock, while he is spilling inside the condom.
You can't think, can't speak, can't do anything. Nothing exists in your mind anymore. Just him. The universe is completely blank save for that one shining star. You fail to register him leaving the room to dispose of the plastic and don't notice when he returns.
"Honey?" he says softly but his voice feels so distant. Kilometres away. You can't bring yourself to form a verbal response. "Are you okay?"
Seonghwa places gentle kisses on your cheeks in an attempt to bring you back to reality.
"Come back to me, darling, please, talk to me, I'm scared," he mumbles in between kisses.
"Hwa?" are your first words. Like a newborn baby looking for the comfort that only a true mother figure could provide.
"You're safe with me," Seonghwa tells you. "No one can hurt you here."
"I don't deserve you," you are suddenly crying, overwhelmed by how cared for and loved he's making you feel.
"Don't say that ever again, you hear me?" he speaks firmly but kindly, nonetheless. "You deserve to be happy. Am I making you happy?"
"So happy, you have no idea how much," you try your best to convince him for your sincerity.
"That's all I need to know," he nods. "Let me draw a bath for you and-"
You summon all the strength you have left and grip his hand as tightly as you physically can't.
"Don't leave me."
"I'm not leaving you," Seonghwa picks you up with ease and carries you all the way to the bathroom.
Once inside the warm bath, you are more capable to form full sentences and communicate what just happened with a clearer head.
"I'm sorry for springing up the whole mommy thing without discussing it in advance," you tell him.
"I don't mind, honestly. In fact, I think I'm perfect for the role."
You smile fondly and nudge his shoulder.
"Still. From now on, I'll try my best to talk about introducing anything new beforehand. It's only fair."
"Whatever makes you feel comfortable," he kisses your forehead as he rubs shampoo into your scalp. "But just so you know, I could never be mad at you."
"What if I want you to get mad every once in a while? You know…spank me for being a bad girl?" you suggest teasingly.
"Then, I'd be happy to oblige," Seonghwa replies enthusiastically and starts tickling you in a playful manner.
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It is true that time heals all wounds and distance makes the heart grow fonder. A while later, you feel ready to talk to your mom again (somewhat influenced by your dad's pleading and Seonghwa's reassurance).
"Hi, mom," you greet her calmly over the phone.
"Hi, sweetie. I've missed you," she admits.
"Me too," and it's true. Even though she hurt you, you still love her.
"Have you been eating well?"
"Yeah, don't worry about that."
"Listen…I'm sorry for saying hurtful things and being so hard on you. I only do that because I think you're so smart and have the potential to do great things."
"Well you have a funny way of showing it," you chuckle dryly.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean…you never praise me for anything. I spent so many years trying to get your approval that I didn't stop for a second to think whether I was doing what I truly loved."
"I understand," your mom says. "I know it might be too late but I'll try to do better. If you'll let me."
"It's not too late. But I'm not coming back to live with you. I've got a boyfriend and a job here. And I'm…actually happy."
"I'm glad to hear that, sweetheart. You will visit eventually, right?"
"I will in the summer. I want us to work on our relationship," you explain patiently.
"Until then…we can Skype or something?" your mom suggests.
"Yeah, mom, we can do that," you laugh. "If you figure how to turn the computer on!"
"Hey!" your mom argues but her tone is amused "I'm not that old!"
"I know, I know," you keep laughing.
"I love you," she says seriously. And this time, you are willing to believe her.
"Love you too, mom," you answer truthfully and hang up the phone.
You look at Seonghwa who was quietly cutting vegetables. His mere presence in the room was giving you strength and moral support.
"I did it," you announce the obvious. "I talked to my mom."
"You did so well. I'm really proud of you, angel," he wraps you into the world's most comforting hug.
"Things won't get magically fixed but…it's a start."
"You did the right thing."
"I couldn't have done it without you, Hwa," you admit truthfully. "You light up my whole dark existence, my precious star."
"Oh, baby," Seonghwa holds your hands. "Stars can't shine without darkness."
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Bonus:
You are so happy to have cooked spaghetti carbonara for your boyfriend, your darling, your starshine, your marvellous Hwa. You really hope he likes it because you've worked so hard on it and it's his birthday so you wanted to do something special for him. He has given you so much care and affection so this is the least you could do to express how grateful you are.
"Happy birthday, my love," you kiss him gently, presenting the meal in front of him. "I have other gifts, as well, but food first before it gets cold!"
"Aw, baby, you didn't have to do all that," Seonghwa smiles, touched by your efforts.
"Come on, try it!" you are practically bouncing with excitement to see his reaction.
"It's really delicious, my angel! You did a wonderful job!" he praises you, sincerity clear in his voice.
You can't take it and you burst into tears.
"Why are you crying? Did I say something wrong?" Seonghwa puts the fork down, immediately worried about your well-being.
"No, it's just…the first time anyone's praised my cooking. It feels incredibly special coming from you, considering you are so brilliant in the kitchen."
"The kitchen is not the only place where I'm incredible," he winks, looking at the bedroom.
"Eat, eat! We'll unwrap the gifts later in that other place," you wipe your tears and encourage him to enjoy his meal.
"Oh, sunshine, you are the only gift I could ask for," Seonghwa promises and goes back to the carbonara. And perhaps, this is what having a home feels like.
The End
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myunghology · 6 months ago
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how knights act like with a crush — 1/2 parts!
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featuring tsukasa, ritsu, leo x gn reader
warnings swearing 💔
genre + layout fluff/crack, headcanons/bulleted layout
a/n YIPPEE reqs open for knights 😈
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s. tsukasa
2nd place for in denial awards, 1st being izumi.. unfortunately! he isn't here.
denies liking you FOR SO LONG it's so sickening, even though it's painfully obvious that he does like you; he just doesn't realize that.
the only reason is because he says a relationship would be too distracting, because obviously, with his idol work and being the next heir of the suou family, he can't a afford a relationship right now. “who says they would even date you?” “RITSU STOP BEING MEAN” “I'M NOT??”
has a habit of buying you food, incase you didn't eat yet. does this LITERALLY everyday, and even if you did eat already, he'd probably just say; “oh.. then you can just eat this later.”
and of course his members would tease him about his ‘not-crush’.. yeahhh totally they believe that (more under the cut!)
“suo~ you to~tally have a crush on [name] don't you?” — leo. “i-i don't! where'd you even get that from..?!” — tsukasa.
has a harder time to suppress his emotions for you if you're clingy. are you wishing for this death at this point? please stop that..
gets so visibly flustered whenever you hug him, saying that quote unquote “it's inappropriate because we're in a workplace” erm okay...... don't act like you don't like it you silly goose (insult)
when you do stop tho he gets upset. “you brought this upon yourself idk why ur so sad dawg” — knights “STOP”
you noticed that, obviously.. so you decided that the best option was to probably..? keep hugging him.
“why do you keep on doing this?” (HE'S WON IN LIFE) “plz stop being delusional..”
probably. asks advice from arashi mainly because she's the only trustable one in knights. (maybe ritsu too but he currently doesn't know where he is right now) if he really does like you. “WELL............... *proceeds to recite a whole paragraph*" — arashi.
“oh.”
AFTER MONTHS. of denying his crush on you. he has decided to finally face his fears and accept it. like the big boy he i-
has been taking care of you more, asking how are you through text, but still with perfect grammar and punctuations. tsukasa do you want to tell [name] anything.
TAKES SOOOOO long to plan on how to confess. bro it probably takes him a month to confess (planning included). that's for another fic tho.
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s. ritsu
doesn't like the fact that he likes you because the feeling is annoying. he hates the fact that he wants your attention everyday, every moment. but he can't help that he wants to be loved.. right? (im just like him fr. head in hands)
the way he's looking at you with stars in his eyes whenever he isn't sleeping, his shoulders are slumped while he's sitting down, looking up at you arranging knights' schedule for this week. “fix your posture, ritsu..” “o-oh..”
he feels a weird thing in his stomach whenever you defend him from people belittling him. other students have done this for him before, but why when it's coming from you.. it's different somehow.
but when they shit talk YOU because of him... OHOHOOOO he's gonna start a riot.
“ritsu.. please stop biting people to the point that they'll bleed.” “NO.”
he often finds himself clinging to you and laying on your lap! especially after once he decided that he can't control his feelings, so.. typically he just tries to embrace it.
but in all honesty? ritsu's genuinely afraid that you might think he's too clingy and you would want to distance yourself from him.
he feels a great sense of warmth when you do return his affection back tho (ノ´∀`*) . he feels soooo content with you— he already wants to be with you in the future!
ritsu often hugs you from your back whenever you're doing something, which often makes people ask, “are you two dating..?” to which you deny. ritsu feels sad.. he just doesn't know that you want it to be true as well.
sometimes he's the one who answers tho, and he says, “yes. we are (#‵′)” which IMMEDIATELY flusters you, and ritsu being ritsu, he definitely teases you about it, and once he found that out, he answers for you and teases you about your ‘cute, little flustered face.’
+ one for them filipino ritsuP's (fem, sorry 😭) he'd definitely call you “misis ko”
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t. leo
his crush is either painfully obvious or absolutely no one can tell if it's platonic or romantic love; mainly because he says ‘i love you’ and is painfully affectionate and clingy to everyone.
probably leaning to more obvious though. It really depends.
someone could be like “leo, [name] is there oh!”“WHERE?!”
they were just kidding.
...thats what makes having a crush on him so hard. he gives these mixed signals but then you quickly realize he does those to other people as well.
he's definitely one of those people who's awkward with their crush. “thank you for being here to see us practice! and.. for being so beautiful..“ “what?” “BRAVE. thank you for being so BRAVE.”
hugs you randomly?? from the back, side, or front bro and INHALES your scent like it's the last thing he'll be smelling until he loses his sense of smell 💀
pay attention to someone else and he's gonna be wiping his tears with a hamster.
HE GETS SOOOOO JEALOUS to the point that you don't know whether to laugh or be concerned. is it really how a friend should be worrying about you? HMMMM
“im gonna be producing another new unit for awhile—” “NUH UH. NO! YOU'RE ONLY OURS!” “LEO-SAN THEY DON'T BELONG TO US”
writes multiple love songs about you and knights definitely tease him about it. you probably somehow find it while cleaning up his messes...
sounds something a little bit like lovers by anna of the north or either from the start by laufey! or... love like you from steven universe <3
or if it's a sappy song, take romantic homicide or let you break my heart again as a reference.
“but [name] is gonna be busy again today.” “aaaUGGhHHHHHHh 😭😭😭😭💔💔💔”
he cannot physically stay away from you for more than a day. if you go to another country— best believe knights will have a concert there.
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©myunghology — skiffydi
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enmie · 2 months ago
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*♡∞:。.。 Basorexia 。.。:∞♡* -pt.3
➶ Fukuzawa, Tachihara, and Sigma getting perhaps a bit too spoiled
➶ basorexia: the intense desire to kiss 【romance】
➶ cw: gn!reader. suggestive (very mild.) cussing (very mild)
𓅪 pt. 3! reqs for pt.4 open!
𓅪 ya'll I'm srry for taking so long school is very shit!
⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎... ⋙
Fukuzawa Yukichi's
Oh, dear, it seems you've flustered him, finally! You think Yukichi is too stoic to show any form of emotion, but alas, mere kisses sent him looking like a tomato. The cold, strict president of the Armed Detective Agency even stays still whenever you lean close to plant both the smallest of kisses on his cheek and the fattest kiss on the lips.
Like now. He keeps his eyes on you, watching as you covered his already red face in crimson-colored lipstick. You swear you let it dry, you swear it wasn't intentional.
And Yukichi seems way too entertained to complain. He loves the way you leave your mark on him, an actual non-hickey mark. He was the only one who was allowed give those.
"Maybe," he starts, "maybe you actually meant to smear your lipstick all over me, don't you think? And maybe a little drunk,"
You shake your head, pulling away after innocently leaving a trail of sticky product. "Nope. Would never smear my lipstick, I worked hard to afford it. And I'm not drunk, champagne doesn't count as beer,"
The president raises an eyebrow, and chuckles lowly as he presses a kiss on your forehead. Lust-filled eyes dart down to your neck, already filled with hickeys from a couple minutes ago. He did bite hard.
"I recall buying it for you, darling."
That face you make, it makes him laugh; your squinted eyes and your lips that hovered right above his neck as you tried to process what he just said to you. Before you could kiss him, of course. "Oh."
"You are drunk. Let's get you to bed." You immediately shake your head at his words, hugging tighter onto him. "Bed? What bed? My bed's right in front of me,"
"Don't try to be slick," He says, forced (but happy) to lift you up.
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Tachihara Michizo's
It's one of those mornings when he's right under you, head resting on your thighs as you played with his hair. Michizo felt tingles every time you ran your fingers through his ginger hair, and it sort of became a practice now. But lately, you'd started to kiss him more and more on his head.
"Ninety-one." He counts after your next kiss. He's already counting up to a hundred kisses even though you've only woken up.
You giggle and place another, which adds another to his list. "Nineties already?"
He nods his head and counts another kiss. You just can't stop! It's his scent, the specific curl of his hair that just makes you want to love him.
Michizo loves the way you kiss his as well, and your soft, candle-like fingers; the way the seem to endlessly touch the depths of his soul yet only touch the skin of his head; it's mesmerizing. Each kiss you give was like a wonder to the boy.
Just like that, you kiss him a few more times before he shouts—
"A hundred!" He shouts joyfully, absolutely full of love just for you. "Care for a hundred more?"
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Sigma's
HHe's convinced you're born whiny. Yeah, he might have existed for only three years, but you seem like you've existed for one. Sigma was forced to stop gambling at the casino for a minute because you wanted to kiss him all day— which wasn't a good idea, but he agreed anyway. What else could he do when he loved you so damn much?
"Okay, let's take a short break from the kissing," He says, face red from both your lipstick and his blush.
You stick your bottom lip out playfully, a big pout on your face because he wanted you to stop. He chuckles at that cute face. But he did continue and try to convince you to stop. Stop? How could you when he looked so damn hot?!
"Nah, let's not."
You press another light kiss on his cheekbone, and you loved that squirmy reaction he gave every time you got close. Oh, how he was so utterly fond of you and the love you made him feel in his limited time here on Earth. Sigma saw you as... special. But a little too clingy.
"Come on. Don't you want to win some more?"
"Hm... I want something else," You whisper to the man, hands trailing down his clean and tidy tuxedo. Not for long.
"... I guess gambling is bad,"
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Enmie's fanfic | BSD
tags: @mrs-hamato here's Fukuzawa :DD you probs forgot cuz I took so long 😭
you r tagged bcuz you interacted w the poll! srry for the bother! : @probabludaistkf @wixard-aros @seraphinariddle @e0sphorus
pt.1 | pt.2 | pt. 4 (coming soon)
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