#I am so bad about just disappearing off here for weeks on end lol
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haikyuuhoo · 11 months ago
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hiiii! how are you?! it’s been a while. how did your tattoo heal up?!
hi bby!! I’m doing good! How are you?? It has been a while, I was very offline during my school break 😅 The tattoo has healed up great & I’m literally so in love with it 🥹🫶🏼 it’s my first tattoo that’s more of an actual art piece and I find myself looking at it so often and going “I can’t believe I have such a cool thing on my body”
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aihoshiino · 6 months ago
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chapter 151 thoughts
Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 8
Aqua Hoshigan Status: Black
Kana enjoyers continue to eat good in this new arc, as 151 very clearly parallels what's considered one of the more iconic AquKana chapters from the first half of the manga with a bit of role reversal in the mix. 'Reversal' is sort of the keyword for this chapter for a handful of reasons but we'll get into that when it's relevant.
the usual shout out to mengo for Peak Faces this chapter. my faves were kana's blushy face as she takes off her glasses and aqua covering his blush with his baseball glove… it does NOT get cuter than that.
It's pretty cathartic to see Kana get a similar TV spotlight to BH!Ruby, where she's centered in B-Komachi's success and Ruby is sort of just in the background lol. That said… kinda of hate that OnK is continuing to frame the ShimaD shit!!! I have a lot of complicated feelings about it but I will say that overall, it's pretty fucked that the story made all those correct assertions about sexual harassment in the entertainment industry and how women and young girls specifically are pressured to kowtow to men to retain their place in the industry and then like… not? link any of this?? to what happened to Kana??? Weird and bad!!!!
on the plus side. megarima and maskua <3
It feels like a good step for Kana to confidently assert that they are, in fact, on a date and their shared visible embarrassment is pretty cute. This is what I meant when I said this chapter was a bit of a reversal of chapter 30, which Aqua even calls explicit attention to - running from school to play catch vs running to school. It works well, imo, as a sort of marker of both change and consistency for both of these characters, showing us how far they've come… but at the same time, how much has managed to stay the same. This return to the early AQKN dynamic is really nice… their moment to moment rapport is the one I enjoy most in the series so even though it's definitely jarring to whiplash back to it after the Movie Arc… idk!! I am still enjoying it all the same.
aqua calling her out on it being a baseball date was really funny btw
And their talk about dreams is… Very Shrimptresting. I keep waffling back and forth on what to take from it, because hypothetically I think it's really interesting but whether or not I really end up liking it is going to depend on how things are handled with Aqua going forward…! IDK, this is the obvious pitfall of analyzing the story like this week to week,
I guess all I'll say now is that this falls in line with how I was reading last chapter's framing of Gorou -> Aqua, where Aqua's inheritance of that identity is just that - an inheritance and it's up to him what he chooses to do with that legacy. He can decide for himself what parts of it he wants to take with him into the future and what he chooses to leave behind.
That said: this is still black hoshigan Aqua. Is this just a 'dream' because it's something he wants but doesn't think he'll be able to have? Or is Aqua starting to seriously consider a future for himself past the end of his revenge quest? It was Kana who prompted him for an answer, after all, and he's already had to make a promise to her that he won't 'disappear'. Is he just lying here to put her at ease? Much to consider…….
Kana's side of this conversation is also really interesting. Kana is a person who acts out of genuine love for her craft, yes, but she's also correct that she kind of already got her assumed end goal of 'be a nationally famous actress' when she was a kid and it didn't necessarily make her happy or fulfilled. To a degree, she's been operating on momentum and desperation to cling to the industry so much of her identity was formed around. But if a 'dream' is something she just wants for herself, without her career coming into it… then what does Kana really want?
And the answer, obviously, is Aqua. With another 'oshi no ko' title drop, to boot…!
It's a little sad that even as Kana makes this tentative confession to him, she still downplays herself in favour of Memcho and Ruby but the emotional stakes she's putting on the table are very loaded. This essentially, without either girl knowing it, puts her in direct competition with Ruby who very much seems to still want to milk her sensei's Little Aqua and I don't imagine that conflict is going to go off without fireworks.
Interestingly, though, this isn't the only point on which the two are opposed here: this is what I mean when I said this chapter's keyword was 'reversal'. While Ruby insists that 'Sensei' is her oshi, Kana offers to be Aqua's oshi. This isn't the first time it's happened, either - when Kana talks about her feelings last chapter, she describes them as 本気の恋 (honki no koi), i.e, seriously, earnestly, truly in love whereas Ruby's confession uses the term ガチ恋 (gachikoi), a slang term referring to a fan who considers themselves to be legitimately in romantic love with a celebrity/idol/etc - and specifically says she's gachikoi for Sensei. Gachikoi is also how the first generation of B-Komachi are described in both Viewpoint B and 45510 in the original Japanese text. On just about all fronts, these two are bound to clash going into the final arc of the story and I'm tentatively interested to see where it goes.
No break next week!
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insertsomthinawesome · 10 months ago
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I'M BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!! Okay so honestly I have been very very inconsistent over the years with just disappearing for periods of time due to various things 😂 So it probably seemed pretty normal to most people.
But it felt different on my side, so I'm excited to be back in business. I took a month long hiatus! 31 days of not drawing digital art. Its not something I talk about on here? But I've been suffering from some serious long term Art Burnout for.... a really really long time. Long enough that I should've taken a break probably years ago. It finally got so bad that I could barely draw. I was scared to do it (cause it always looked "bad" in my eyes [i'll come back to that]) and doing it was exhausting and disheartening.
I talked it over with somebody and realized that the fear and anger and frustration I felt towards my own artwork was uh. Not Normal or Healthy. And I finally committed to taking a real break for once.
I still drew a little bit by hand? Traditional art has always felt like it has lower stakes for me (i don't often share it online, and sometimes I don't even share it with friends) so I did some of that when I felt like it. But Digital art was completely off the table.
I had put such an immense pressure on myself to make my digital art perfect, to make as much of it as quickly as possible to satisfy something. It wasn't fun anymore. I'm proud of what i've made over the years! But for a long time now the stuff I've been making was made while hating every second of making it. With some rare exceptions.
I hated my art! It was a combination of Perfectionism, taking in too many external expectations, and the burnout. If you hate doing something its kinda hard to love it even when you want too lol. It wasn't "Bad" in the sense that the quality was low and it was ugly! It was "Bad" in the sense that it was unhealthy for me to keep doing it at that point in time.
I'm glad to report though, that with my hiatus officially over as of Wednesday last week: I am once again. In Love. With doing art, and being an artist :)
I put off taking a break for years cause I was scared that taking a break would mean that I would never achieve all the things I wanted to do with art. I was scared it was a stupid and lazy thing to do that would mean I'd never achieve my dreams. And Also even though I kinda hated drawing, I also loved making art. Its a weird duality that I can't even really explain??? I hated it but I also loved it. I wanted it but I also wanted to run from it. It wasn't until I was more mature and had more clarity and insight (and unfortunately also until the problems got worse) that I was finally able to let go of those fears and just do it.
And I'm really really glad I did. It was everything I needed. And I hope to strike a better balance in the future with art. Taking more breaks when I need them, or just when other things have my attention like reading or Video games (Some star rail got played during this time xD)
From the outside things probably aren't going to be that different?? At this point I don't really have any sure plans to post anything I've been drawing since my Hiatus ended. I might or I might not xD I'm still a hobbyist artist taking things at her own pace, but I hope that it shows how much happier I am :)
Whumptober 2023 is being officially put to rest by this post btw! I was in major burnout when that event started, and I'm ready to just, move on from all the past expectations I'd shoved on my shoulders. If I feel like filling any of the prompts or going back to any of the ideas I'd come up for it I will! But I'm not going to worry about doing it unless the desire sets in. Thanks to everybody who's been so kind to me throughout my time on here as an artist! Ya'lls tags and screaming and kind words, the fanfic, the asks and the responses? Its been fantastic :) You guys have made me laugh, smile, and cry tears of joy. I hope from here that things only get better and sweeter! And if I have bad days again, that's okay too.
Here's to 2024 and whatever it may bring ya'll :D 🎉🎉✨✨🧡💜
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diabolikpersonals · 9 months ago
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kanato cl endings!! this is my new favorite kanato route!! and for once, I think the good ending is more satisfying than the bad one lol
euphoria end:
in the church, kanato concludes that he just can’t ignore the sakamaki brothers. he has all kinds of feelings for them, including jealousy and contempt, and because of that, he won’t be able to part with them easily. (thats the most backwards way to say you love them I’ve ever heard, but I’ll take it!! good job, kanato!!) but outside, the scarlet and violet families are arguing over who gets to go inside and steal eve. ayato and laito are standing guard, and even though they’re SO outnumbered, ayato declares that they’ve got no choice but to stop em. and laito says it’s for his oniichan’s sake ^^
kanato… [wiping tears] …wants to go save ayato and laito. he can’t leave them, because they’re brothers who have been together since before they were born.
before he goes, he and yui stand at the altar and yui comments that it feels like a wedding, but kanato refutes that they can’t possibly have a wedding without wedding cake. they have a ring, though! because kanato bit yui’s ring finger earlier and it left a scar. so, because it might be their last time, they exchange vows and kiss.
…which is, of course, the key to leaving this place. everything goes white and they’re back in the real world. yui thinks ayato and laito are dead for a sec, but theyre just snoozin. karl heinz shows up, explains the whole thing, and gives kanato a pat on the back and tells him it’s time to inherit his powers.
kanato says, no way!! I won’t be king. I once thought that I didn’t care about those other guys, but I’ve just realized I have all these complicated feelings about them, and I don’t know what I’ll do if those guys are gone. so I won’t be all alone like you, father.
karl heinz is like “lmao…I’ll give u a little more time” and he disappears. time to go home. kanato jokes that they can leave ayato and the others behind, but he’s not serious >_> so they get to work waking em up. kanato says that he never thought such a day would come, but he misses how noisy the sakamaki house is. (awwww…!!)
back at the sakamaki house, the triplets + yui are studying together for a makeup exam. ayato and laito start goofing off after ten minutes, but kanato is SERIOUS because reiji hid all his sweets so he NEEDS to pass. he kicks his brothers out so he can focus, then grumbles that he should’ve left them at the miniature garden (LMAO) but yui’s like “aww, you’re totally having fun.” they make out and kanato says he loves her no matter where they are, and all’s well that ends well!! good for them!
labyrinth end:
yui confidently tells kanato she’ll trust whatever his decision is, and he’s like “okay. I want to murder everyone.” yui is all UMMM anything but that, please??? but he’s not listening. he sucks her blood till she loses consciousness
it suddenly cuts to carla whipping ruki and shin till they pass out, which is awesome but very unexpected. it’s the first we’ve seen them since they got captured lol. subaru arrives to tell carla that eve is at the church, so off we go!!
at the church, ayato and laito have gotten their asses severely kicked by scarlet fam. yuma also collapses and shu’s like “yuma….!” which is enough otp crumbs to keep me fed all week, thank you very much. carla arrives on the scene and starts shittalking with reiji, but then…!!
………..when yui wakes up, she sees kanato is covered in blood and she’s like “oh god we have to treat ur injuries!” and of course kanato’s like “dont worry, it’s not my blood ^^” he happily tells her that he’s almost finished taking care of things here, and he continues his unspeakable violence. he’s killed everyone and they’re the only ones left. he hugs her, and the blood he’s covered with is still warm.
well it doesn’t work; they don’t go home. (not that this would work anyway, but aren’t ruki and shin still alive in the violet dungeon? am I wrong…? did carla kill them? whatever.) yui faints and can’t speak, so kanato moves her around like a doll. they’ll live forever in this world, then, just the two of them. it’ll be awfully quiet.
back in the real world, karl heinz is like “my friend. did u get my sons killed” and socrates is like “sowwy :( I just didnt think it was worth it to lose my best friend to some immature adam.” karl heinz says it’s ok, and socrates suggests reversing time. karl heinz is like sure, yeah, let’s reverse time and have them try again. (EXCUSE ME???? EXCUSE ME????????????? COULD U DO THAT THIS WHOLE TIME. THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING) so I guess they, uh, reverse time and try again????.?.??
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lovesick-boyz · 1 year ago
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hi.
well… after being stalked and harassed for the past couple of months, i am finally back!! stay tuned lol i got some fics lined up for y’all 😁
anyway if you read that first line and thought to yourself “WTF?!?”, here is the full story for my curious readers (just a warning, it’s long and i rant a lot):
a couple of months ago, i started getting tagged by random accs on tiktok and insta that posted vids accusing me of the most random and heinous shit. honestly, it just baffled me the first time i saw them bc they made absolutely no sense whatsoever.
when the first ones popped up, i just blocked them thinking it was a random troll and went on with my life.
but then i kept getting spammed by other accs with new posts where they not only involved me but also my friends, and accused us as a friend group of being horrible ppl.
i had enough (i can’t even remember how many accs i blocked) and deleted ALL my social media apps for a while (i.e. more than a couple of months, oops) and basically isolated myself from ppl so that i could focus on other things to distract me (i ended up making daily exercise a habit so ig that’s one good thing that’s come out of this lol, i also rewatched all the marvel movies in timeline order hehe). i wish i continued writing so i could’ve at least had more content to share by now, but i was feeling so negative and pissed that i couldn’t even bring myself to write anything (i even uninstalled notion from my phone and that’s where i keep all my drafts and fic ideas)
i only found out the full situation less than a week ago when i reinstalled tiktok bc i missed it, only to find more burner accs harassing me. i finally had enough so i reinstalled insta to rant about it on my spam acc for my friends to see and to my surprise a couple of them knew who it was and explained the whole situation to me.
it was my first time interacting with ppl outside of my family in months lol, when i tell y’all i isolated myself i really did mean it 🙃 my irl friends didn’t even know anything out of the ordinary was happening bc i’m notorious in my friend group for going off the grid for months at a time bc of how bad my mental health gets sometimes, they know to just let me be and let me deal with it alone bc they understand that’s how i work best. (they won’t see this bc they don’t know this tumblr exists but i wanna apologise to my dear friends for my disappearing acts, my bad, i love y’all for being so understanding and still being my friend after all this time 🫶🏼)
anyway, it turns out the culprit was this guy that my friend had rejected previously and he’s so bitter and hateful that he decided to harass me bc he knew i was one of her bffs (the ppl he targeted were the ones in her closest friend group which included me)
but here’s the kicker: I’VE ONLY TALKED TO THIS GUY TWICE!! AND EACH TIME WE TALKED FOR LESS THAN 5 MINS ABOUT IRRELEVANT SHIT!!! WHY AM I INVOLVED?? YOU DON’T KNOW ME!!!!
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when my friend found out she was so surprised and appalled that he was harassing me too, bc him, my friend, and the other ppl he targeted all go to the same college together (and i’m the only one in the friend group that goes to a different college, so to reiterate once again: this guy barely knows me! the last time we spoke was at my friends bday party 3 years ago!! he’s literally insane!)
she knew he was harassing my other friends since they’re all in the same school and know him in person, she didn’t think i would be involved too and i couldn’t believe i was.
anyway, i just wanted to rant about this whole thing bc i’m having a hard time processing it tbh. i hope that guy rots in hell and also finds a job there bc he was acting hella unemployed like who has time for this? he made me feel so confused and paranoid for weeks and i hope he gets all the karma he deserves in the universe.
y’all wanna know something funny tho? i started writing a changmin stalker fic in june, way before this whole situation happened. life imitates art ig 🤪 anyway i finally finished it and i’m gonna release that fic next after i fine tune it, at least now it’ll be somewhat realistic lmaoooo
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allykatsart · 2 years ago
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I missed monster AU. I am so excited. Are there any fun facts or tidbits you want to share :D
Many actually! And I am absolutely gonna take this ask and run with it as far as I fucking can. I've been w a i t i n g and you may regret asking. Thank you! ❤️
Henrik and Marvin
Something I haven't touched on a lot in my art is how Marvin and Henrik met. Marvin was thrown out of his coven for his practice of summoning demons, and was wandering for awhile, before he found and befriended Henrik.
They met at a supernatural friendly bar. And um. Well. They both had a bit of a 'Mad Scientist' complex when it came to magic. Not so much in that they want to do anything harmful with it, but they'll do stuff just to see if they can.
Henrik has been to school and likes the non magical sciences, knows a lot about them. Marvin is self taught and has experimented in areas he probably shouldn't have. They wanted to know what would happen if you mixed the two.
Henrik has a project in mind, and they began working on it at Henrik's mansion, growing into good friends as they did so. Eventually, Marvin just ended up living at the house.
And that's how Robbie came into being and got his two dads! (Make of that what you will lol)
(side tangent, Covens in this world are just a group of witches within a certain area or each other that generally band together or have similar goals. Kinda like a friend group. Each is different and has different rules, and there are witches who belong to multiple Covens)
Marvin did not have multiple covens, he had one that he was really into. But his friends grew distant over time and eventually tried to talk him out of summing demons, which was morally objectionable to them. Marvin didn't listen to them and didn't respect their boundaries, so got kicked out.
(more under the cut)
Henrik needs human blood, but he doesn't like taking directly from the source. It reminds him that he's not immune to impulse, that he could lose control of himself if he's not careful.
Marvin also isn't comfortable with being a bloodbag for his vampiric friend, so they both agree that Henrik never feeds off of Marvin.
(on top of that the magic in Marvin's blood makes it taste spicy so Henrik doesn't like it)
Marvin and Henrik share something else in common, a flaw. They both crave control. For Henrik, it's control of himself. For Marvin, it's control of his life. Marvin wants freedom, Henrik wants self discipline. Both can delve into unhealthy behaviors to achieve these things. But they understand what the other wants.
Kinda alluded to before but they may have a relationship? When asked, both reply vaguely and refuse to elaborate. They both find it incredibly funny.
Marvin has lived in the mansion long enough he knows all the secret passageways and hidden nooks. He can disappear into the house and not be found for weeks if he wants to be.
Jack and IRIS
Since I only recently started incorporating it into my AU, I wanna get my thoughts out about it.
IRIS here is kinda a bad thing. It's a group of humans who have decided that the supernatural is bad/has bad effects on people, so have dedicated themselves to hunting down any overtly supernatural creatures and either killing them or containing them. They alone have caused most of the monsters to go into hiding.
They have 'Hunters' who go around trying to find supernatural entities to either capture or kill. Hunters are usually human, tho occasionally they might have some supernatural enhancement, if IRIS approves of it.
Jack used to be a part of these hunters until he became a monster himself. From there he had to do a lot of self discovery... And it eventually lead him down the path to meet Anti, the demon of fear and nightmares.
During this time, IRIS lost contact with Jack and didn't know what happened to him. They were/are also unaware of Jack being a werewolf.
Jack was able to escape Anti, and kept on the down low, hiding from IRIS for some time. It was only when he saved Chase from Anti that IRIS found him again.
IRIS won't force him back into their ranks, but they are very suspicious of him reappearing after years of no contact. They suspect he's hiding something, or has had a change of heart.... Which Jack has had.
(Also, to clarify, Jack is not Sean, it's the character of Jack.)
Jack is unaware that IRIS had found him until Chase was taken in for questioning. Once Chase came back, Jack suspected it was IRIS, and began worrying about them. This pushed him into a spiral and he began having nightmares again... Which pushed him into Anti's domain again and caused the demon to try and find him again
Basically bad things happen to Jack and it's all IRIS's fault!
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gilfrespecter · 2 years ago
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I'm chatty this morning sorry(I'm not it's my blog I'll do what I want)
Some things that I'm thinking about is one day I really want to switch to just having a landline and a desktop. Probably a flipphone too(do they make ones with good cameras?). I love having my Friends in my pocket but alas there is also The Apps there and I'm the kind of insane guy who prefers phone calls to texting especially for information that doesnt need to be written down to be remembered.
2 my favorite flavor of monster(papillon the real sugar peach one) has disappeared replaced by the australian lemonade which is Nasty. I do like the pineapple reserve and the sailor jerry can one but peach is one of my favorite flavors and artificial sugars make me sick. I was looking about maybe ordering some with my tax return but it's like. 40$ for a 24 pack when all the gas stations around here always have a "buy multiple for cheaper" sale going on. I've asked they won't let me just buy a pack. Wait I actually just did the math the 3 for $5 deal is the same price as the 24 pack($1.67). Much to think about. I'd probably be better off just starting to take a multivitamin LOL
3 oh my god I want to kayak so fucking bad. Mine is absolutely NOT safe to take out in the winter and I don't mind being cold I don't mind being wet but I do not like being cold and wet and to launch mine bc it's so long I have to go like at least ankle depth into the water to launch it and that's not even beginning to talk about getting a 16 foot ocean kayak up on top of my fucking chevy spark on the icy driveway(it DOES look very silly it's mostly safe. I dont take it on the highway). Or out of the basement even LOL. I also absolutely need to get my fishing license this year what with the price of meats. With my rudder working now I can go Faster and Further which I'm excited about and I think that's what my brain's like "kayak time now" about. I need to take a rescue course TBH they're really cheap by the local paddle renting company in a nice warm inside pool but also that involves being Maskless which I don't do(waterboarding is not an option) and I'm still not allowed to be Submerged. It's absolutely something I can teach myself on a calm day at like one of the state parks I just need to work on powering through cold shock again which I used to be really good at and am probably Even Less Good At Now bc a ton of fat has been Removed from my chest. But also I run even warmer now(who knew that was possible LOL) so it might be less of a problem than I'm thinking it will be
Speaking of post top surgery changes WOW THEY SURE CAN DO my voice has dropped again relatively significantly for me(I still have a pretty high voice but I can hit really low if I try I'd love to do voice training but money) my facial hair is coming in alot more too I use like. Minoxodil once a week at work/if I remember (when I first get in this way I can wash it off to keep the Vivicat safe by the end of the day) but I don't think once a week is enough to really be the Cause. I wonder if getting my Very Expired nexplanon out will change things more(I was on it to stop my period which t seems to be keeping up on just fine I'm just not getting it taken out bc I like using my arms and they wouldn't do that for me during top surgery I asked. I don't really need it either pandemic induced celibacy).
I want to go to one of the drag shows or karaoke nights at the local leather/only gay bar soon. I need to remember to set up an eye doctor appointment on monday. Nushki needs a bath. You scrolled through all this so here's the reward of seeing Nushki being Sillay
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ddeongies · 5 months ago
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U LITERALLY UPDATED WHILE I WAS WRITING THIS but hi im sending it anyway because i do love giving feeback and opinions lol. i was rereading to prep before ryeji day and i have(had?) some thoughts. if anything is incoherent i’m sorryyyy but like we are seeing each other rn like i Understand.
to start off, i think its soooo funny how BOTH of them decided to keep the field of wildflowers secret during their respective grillings. like. lol. ok .
i honestly think...considering what we learn in chapter 7, that whole couch thing really ends up reading to me as ryujin trying to gauge the situation and see if yeji has any interest in her at all. cuddling into her like that I SEE U. I SEE HERRRR. which makes yeji's comment about ryu having "no ulterior motive" 10x funnier to me.
adding on to that, i think the fact that yeji does slip up a bit with how she's managing her feelings towards ryu both a) encourages ryujin to push forward a little more e.g. inviting her to pregame, sitting pressed up against yeji, all of her friends somehow disappearing from the dancefloor. and b) makes me wonder about how any potential "ryujin finds out yeji went off and slept with someone else" scenes will go. (for both of them really, like i do think yeji will definitely be feeling some type of way (bad) afterwards regardless of how soon ryujin may or may not find out).
to that last point, i remember how ryujin reacted when chaer asked her if it was okay that she had hooked up with yeji, before she had actually acknowledged any sort of feelings or desire towards her, compared to now, where she's gotten to the point of realizing her physical attraction but (as far as we know) no real emotional connection beyond being friends (yet). so i'm really curious about how she'll end up coming around to the realization that she's wayyyy more into yeji than she originally thought, and how yeji's actions in chapter 8 will affect her after she does come to that realization. like to me it feels like there's a high possibility of that feeding back into the deryusions and reinforcing ryu's idea that yeji only sees her as a friend. (WELL. THAT FIRST PARAGRAPH OF CHAPTER 9. LOL LMAOOOO. LMAOOOOO. )
it's really so funny to me watching it go back and forth between perspectives and seeing both of them go "there's no WAY she wants me back", like as frustrating as that kind of cycle could be it doesn't read as cliche or frustratingly boring because it's more of just both characters being unsure of what the other wants and acting based on that perception, true or not, and its written in such a way that keeps you engaged with the story and characters.
i honestly could go on and on about yeji's self-image in this fic (i had sent an ask a little over a week ago about it, and i did draft up some of my thoughts about her but it ended up being LONG AF lmao). but she's really so... as much as she is confident, i think it's briefly touched on in the fic itself, having a reputation does go both ways, and i think the way that she sees people treat her and the way she thinks they feel about her really are getting to her head when it comes to actually wanting to date someone. that comment she makes about people not seeing her as "girlfriend material" (the biggest lie ever), and how she's never been "it" for someone... ohhh baby no.... and as much as she is confident she's still almost convinced that ryujin would only ever see her as a friend which leads her to keep treating her as such (because above all else at the moment, they ARE friends, and yeji isn't the type of person who would push more than she thinks ryujin is willing to accept) and also to her misinterpretation of and outright refusal to read into any potential signals that ryujin might actually share her feelings.
i always feel a little bit silly whenever i do this because.w ell obviously YOU know all this already but here i am talking ur ear off about something u literally wrote and thought through urself and this also ended up being way longer than i thought it would even after i rewrote most of it to try and trim it down. idk this fic is making me crazy af omg….its genuinely...so well written. i love slow burn and narratives and character nuance and the ins and outs of relationship development and ur giving all of that and more. 🖤🖤🖤 OFF TO READ THE REST OF CH 9 NOW AAAAA
OMG I LOVE THIS i love comments and asks like this literally pls never stop!!! imma go under a read more so i can respond to each point!
also yesss you manifested the update LOL i hope you enjoy chapter 9!!!! and this is not incoherent at all i love it i live for this like i said like comments like this are the best part of posting fic i'm so serious
keeping the flower field private is so gay..... like ladies......
LOL i'm very glad you picked up on this! and since chapter 9 is out it's been confirmed lol, ryu definitely had an ulterior motive there. yeji was just a bit too much in her own head about everything to realize it
yes for sure! yeji doesn't want to scare ryu off (since she doesn't know how she feels), but she's only human, so like drunkenly telling her she looks hot on instagram is definitely the type of thing that ryu would see and be like "okay there's maybe more here than i originally thought." like i don't think she would've invited yeji over that night at all if that hadn't happened (even if she wanted to see her). also like, yes ryu, yeji is friendly foward and flirty, but she is for sure different with you than she is with her besties lol. and we didn't have yeji pov after that last hookup, but i can guarantee she didn't feel good about it. both because it wasn't ryujin and because she wasn't fully present with the person she was actually with. she's definitely the type of person who would feel really guilty about thinking about someone else during sex even if it's not on purpose
i do think ryu is in an interesting place with her feelings. she realized in chapter 7 that she's attracted to yeji, but then after they spent halloween together that's when she realized she's definitely feeling more than just physical attraction. she's kind of back and forth in this space (at least pre chapter 9) where part of her is like "yeji probably only wants to be my friend" and "yeji doesn't do relationships, but maybe she would want to hook up?" (BUT YES CHAPTER 9 LMAO)
i'm so glad to hear it's not reading in a cliche or frustrating way! like they're kind of dummies, but you can't really blame them. both of them have perceptions of themselves and each other that are getting in the way of jumping into a real romantic relationship, but that's kind of how life works (especially when you're young). i honestly think it would be expecting a lot from a couple of college students to think they would just like sit down and talk about their feelings in that vulnerable and honest kind of way. they are communicating and getting closer, but these things are a bit of a dance. so i guess i'm just trying to capture that real kind of slow burn back and forth. i don't want it to be contrived and slow just for the sake of it i just want them to feel real!
omg yes yes that ask! i loved that and if you ever have more thoughts on nmau yeji please do share i love talking about her and thinking about her and writing her! (the longer the better 😈) she's definitely both self aware and also not at all lol, which, again, is only fair for a college student i think. i think it's probably true that many people (ryujin included) don't assume she's looking for anything serious because she's never really shown the opposite to be true, but it doesn't mean no one views you as girlfriend material baby girl pls! she has high self esteem but it mostly manifests in those fields in which she's confident. hookups, soccer, certain classes. she knows she's hot, knows other people think that, but she has no romantic experience, and she's really feeling that lack of confidence in that area. she likes ryujin to the point where it's definitely getting in her way, but she just really wants to handle it with care it just happens to be a bit clumsy too!
PLEASE don't feel silly omg. i think so deeply about what i'm writing and the fun thing about it is some people will read what i wrote go "cool story!" and go on with their day until the next update. but some people (like you!!) will read my writing much more critically. i love to see what people pick up on deeper levels. the foreshadowing, motifs, nuances of characterization. like yes i know what i'm putting in, but seeing what other people pick up from my writing is genuinely my favorite part of posting! it's touching to me that you like my fic (and my yeji) so much, so thank you for this ask and your last one (and any future ones!!) 🖤🖤🖤
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starry-bi-sky · 1 year ago
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raaaaaaaaaa @ghoulsgogames you love asking questions? Well I love answering them (and if I don't have an answer to it, I'll just say it lol). Nine times out of ten it will revitalize my own obsession with an au, especially if its been a while since I talked about it. (Like how watercolour-carnations asked me about my Thomas Wayne au and I literally wrote a 3k oneshot that following day because I was so happy) To me it means someone liked my idea enough to have more thoughts on it themselves, which is always one of my goals when I share an au of mine.
(I never mention it in my posts but if literally anyone wants to remix this idea or add on their own thoughts, I'm literally so down for it. It's my favorite thing ever to see how people interpret my work and make it their own. all i ask is that they either tag me or reblog it on this post so that I can see it <3)
I type a lot so im putting this under a read more
I mentioned it in the comments but I'll just re-say it here about Danny's opinions on billionaires: my thoughts for that was that Danny already distrusted Bruce on principle for being a billionaire (remember; he grew up poor in Crime Alley before they moved to Amity Park. He has poor opinions about uber rich people in general). To me, Danny considered Bruce as the exception and not the rule. He had a little hope for Vlad Masters when he first learns about him, but that disappears pr quickly after they meet. He has that same slimy vibe as every other rich person Danny's ever met.
(aaaaa im so excited over your questions that I'm having trouble thinking of an answer for them)
I'm very much in love with your Jason and Danny both fuming and plotting on opposite ends of the gala tag. Literally love it. Danny's gonna literally demolish the Joker when he sees him. It's fr on fucking sight.
I don't know what Danny owes Vlad atm, when I was writing this it was just an excuse to get him into the Wayne Gala because lord knows he wouldn't go willingly. Danny has been avoiding Gotham like a plague ever since the Funeral. First it was because of bad memories, and then afterwards its because he knew that the next time he stepped foot into the city, there was a high chance that he was going to hunt down the Joker immediately. He wanted to do it when he was ready.
Vlad is absolutely also trying to use Danny's connection to the Waynes to his advantage. He's also just trying to show off that Danny is his Godson. (I love your tag talks I'm gonna be riding this high all day)
ALSO YEAH JACKDAW'S TAGS HAD ME SWOONING BECAUSE YES. YEESSSSS. THEY GET IT. JASON'S PAIN OVER REALIZING THAT HIS BEST FRIEND IS STILL MOURNING HIM FIVE YEARS LATER AND THAT HE WANTS TO MURDER THE JOKER WITH HIS OWN HANDS. I was literally vibrating over that part because yessss. Angst go BRRR and the tragic realization that the death of a loved one can sometimes permanently affect someone for the rest of their life. That Danny has been holding onto this grief for all these years and the reason he hasn't been back to Gotham is because he's been wanting to murder the Joker all this time and has been biding his time for it. He has been waiting and Jason can only imagine he's been waiting this long because Danny wants to actually go through with it. A tiny fourteen year old (civilian) probably can't kill the Joker on purpose. But a furious, vengeance-filled, 6'5 nineteen year old? That's a little more likely.
Post-posting addition: i just remembered this but Danny turning to the Red Hood, a vigilante and saying to his face that he is going to kill the Joker. Danny knows that the Red Hood has a direct line to the Batman and he still tells him that he is going to murder the Joker. It is an unspoken "I am going to kill this man and there is nothing you can do to stop me. That is how much Jason meant to me"
Also Danny's apathy over his own death. Danny dying a week after Jason has been in 'the drafts' ever since I first thought of this au last month. Danny had always been planned to die a week after Jason, and I hadn't put much thought into it beyond just "Jason and his family are going to think Danny did it on purpose" and the angst behind that. But the idea that he really is just apathetic towards his own fate, that he doesn't really care that he died because now he can see Jason again? It's 👌 chefs kiss *mwha*
No yeah Jason was totally wondering how Danny knew how he died. And Danny's ranted a lot about his parents before he moved and their stupid ghost theories. Jason knew at least that much. It's something that was a little hard to forget. And I totally think Danny mentioned the portal in passing in his letters, but only in passing. He thought it was dumb and he bitched about it once in a letter to Jason when they started on it because it was eating up their time even more and somehow he saw them even less than when he was in Gotham.
But he never really brought it up after that. just that his parents were 'building some stupid portal in the basement' which. Concerning. Somehow Jason didn't bring it up to Bruce (my first thought is that it's because he knows that the Drs. Fenton and their inventions hardly ever work, so he wasn't concerned about it)
Which means that when Danny says 'Jason's ghost told me how he died' Jason genuinely takes it a little more seriously than if he hadn't had the ghost context from before. Because with that one line Jason is suddenly slapped in the face with the reminder that: hey, the Fentons were literally building a portal to hell in their basement and according to Danny, it WORKED
Because who else would have told him that it was the Joker who killed him and how? Bruce didn't, Jason knows that for certain. And it brings up another concern: how did Danny find his ghost, and why doesn't Jason remember being one. What OTHER things did his ghost tell Danny? How much did he know? There's so many concerning things in that one line alone.
And as for Jason not looking into amity park... I genuinely think he might've avoided Amity Park like the plague just as much as Danny avoided Gotham. Iirc literally none of the bats are good at emotional shit, and Jason was angry, revived, and a crime lord. Telling Danny that he was alive had a lot of factors in it that Jason was not emotionally ready to address. Like Jackdaw said: Jason probably feels a lot of shame and self-consciousness when it comes to Danny, and that fear of rejection is very much there.
Raaaaa thats all i can think of answering but if you have more questions or literally just want to rant at me about this au, then my DMs are very open and willing to listen to said rants. Seriously, I loove hearing peoples thoughts. I want you to rant if you have one. Please do it’d make my day
Childhood Friends Danny and Jason
(cw underage smoking / smoking as a form of bonding) (cw Jason thinking Danny killed himself but its only for a moment) (cw depictions of murderous intent? Danny wants to murder the Joker and he's a little descriptive about it
This is… aha. Massive. Word count check: 9k+
this has probably been done before but hey, everyone loves a good trope and I wanted to share my take on this idea. 👏👏 So, Danny Fenton and Jason Todd being childhood friends. The Fentons lived in Crime Alley for a good long while during Danny's childhood. Nobody wanted to fund their research and Jack and Maddie struggled to keep any form of work for a multitude of reasons. Jack worked in construction due to his big build and Maddie had another job elsewhere.
Danny and Jason were friends during that time, really great friends. I'm not super solid on how they met yet but I do know it involves Danny committing petty crime and Jason deciding to jump in and help when he sees Danny struggling. Danny was distrustful (as all crime alley kids ought to be) but they eventually became thick as thieves, committing petty crime together.
While it's all too easy to make Danny the weaker one of the two with Jason protecting him, I actually really like the idea that they protected each other. Growing up (essentially) on the streets means Danny forcibly had to grow a backbone unless he wanted to get trampled all over. He is just as willing to scuffle with the bigger kids as Jason is, and he and Jason regularly fought each other whenever they needed to let off steam, or just because. They were a duo, having each other's backs in tough situations.
(Sometimes the pair of them would sneak out at night and try and get a glimpse of Batman and Robin while they soared through the air. It was like a game between the two of them to see who could spot the dynamic duo first. When they were a little older, Jason would steal his dad's cigarettes and share them with Danny while they searched for Batman and Robin)
So when Danny has to move away when they're eleven years old, it's pretty safe to say that Jason didn't speak to him for a week afterwards. Nothing Danny did could persuade him to otherwise, even when Danny insisted that it wasn't his fault and that he didn't want to move away either, but he didn't have a choice in the matter.
When the week was over, Jason climbed through Danny's window and sat in his room, dead silent and looking upset. he didn't speak until Danny fished out a stolen pack of cigarettes from his bed and handed one to Jason.
(It was a ritual they had where if one of them was upset about something but wasn't saying anything, the other one could then hand them a cigarette -- whether it be the one they were using or a new one -- and that would be an open invitation for the person to vent. The other one who handed him the cigarette wouldn't speak until the venter handed back the cigarette. Then back and forth it would go until the cigarette was gone.)
Jason ranted about how pissed he was about Danny moving, and they promised to try and stay in touch after he leaves. Neither of them had phones, but Danny was determined to send him a letters.
Danny moves to Amity Park and it's... an adjustment, that's for sure. He's angry, grumpy, upset, and every other negative feeling under the sun. He was going to a new middle school with new people he didn't know, away from all of the people he did know and away from his best friend.
(He does however keep his word about sending letters, and mails one out to Jason at the first opportunity.)
He refuses to get along with anyone, butts heads with the teachers, is combative, rude, and openly smokes in class -- which gets him plenty of detentions and a bad reputation. He speaks in a thick Gotham street accent and wears hand-me-down clothes that are too big and baggy on him. (His parents have yet to replace any of their wardrobes as they settle into their new life, and Danny is hesitant to spend the money to get new clothes.)
He only manages to befriend Sam and Tucker because one of the football kids was bullying Tucker and Danny stepped in. It was some blond jerk named Dash and when Dash threw the first punch, Danny broke his nose. Tucker found him later that day and reluctantly thanked him for his help.
Sam and Danny do not get along for the longest time. Sam questions Danny about his upbringing, his accent, his smoking. She judges him for talking back to the teachers despite doing it herself and for ruining his lungs with cigarettes. Danny tells her to fuck off, and when she tries to judge him and Tucker for not being vegetarian, he calls her a privileged brat.
Sam doesn't even look at him for two weeks after, and Danny refuses to apologize. Tucker is caught between a rock and a hard place as his old friend and new friend are feuding with each other.
They... sort it out eventually.
Danny and Jason send each other letters near religiously. Danny complains about Amity Park, and Jason complains about how Crime Alley isn't the same without him. Danny talks about the school and what he's learned, about Sam and Tucker, and how he's been getting into the astronomy books in the library. He steals Jason a book and sends it to him.
When Jason tells Danny that he was adopted by Bruce Wayne, Danny calls bullshit. There's no fucking way Bruce Wayne would even look at Crime Alley, regardless of his charity efforts towards it. But when he checks Gotham news later that week, he's hit in the face with every single news article announcing Bruce Wayne's newest ward; Jason Todd.
Cue freaking out. Jason talks all about living in Wayne Manor and what it's like there. He says that there's a monster library in a part of the house that Bruce says he has free reign over, and that Jason can have anything to eat as long as he asks Alfred to make it and it isn't a desert, and that he has his own monster-sized room that he got to pick out himself and decorate.
(When they both get phones, the first thing either of them do is add each other's numbers.)
When Sam complains about having to go to a Wayne Gala that her parents are dragging her to one weekend, the first thing Danny asks is if he can go with. It surprises Sam and Tucker; Danny was the last person they would have thought wanted to go with. HE hates the rich even more than Sam does. Danny stands firm in his decision, and refuses to elaborate.
"Besides." He says to Sam, with whom he's begun to get along with via 'the enemy of my enemy is a friend'. "Would you rather go alone or with someone you can tolerate?"
She brings him with and convinces her parents to allow Danny to come along, citing that she'll be on her best behavior if they do. They agree, and buy Danny a suit when he says that he doesn't have one of his own.
(He discovers that he hates wearing suit jackets and ties, but vests he doesn't mind. He doesn't like that he has to comb his hair back, but he does to make Sam's parents happy. They give him a crash course in etiquette that Danny's going to forget the next day, and soon enough off they go in a private jet to Gotham)
(he does not tell Jason he's coming.)
he feels mischievous and nervous as they touch down, his stomach swirling as Sam's parents usher them to a high-profile hotel that Danny's only ever dreamed about going into. He feels largely out of place as they walk through the lobby, and falls back on old habits: square shoulders, set jaw, make yourself look like the biggest person in the room.
They get ready in the hotel room, Sam's parents primp and preen for the night incoming, and Sam is dragged into it by her mother. Danny does only what's required of him, and fiddles with the sleeves of his fresh-ironed button-down that's been tailored to his body. He's itching for a cigarette, and didn't bring any with.
Sam's dad helps him with his tie, a bout of kindness that Danny doesn't think is one. Just obligation to prevent Danny from looking like a mess. Sam pesters him again about wanting to come, and his reasons for it, and Danny keeps mum.
He's stone-faced with anxiety as they get closer to the gala, and before they leave the limousine the Mansons rented Sam links arms with him. A form of solidarity that Danny needs as he squeezes their arms together and smiles weakly at her.
The paparazzi are loud, bright, and demanding, shouting questions over questions at them like overlapping tidal waves. Danny ignores them all and focuses on the front doors instead. Sam's parents whisper at the stairs that they are to greet the Waynes first, and Danny's heart leaps to his throat.
His heart is in his ears as they drift closer, Mister Wayne is preoccupied with another rich couple, smiling that charming billionaire smile that Danny saw on every billboard in Gotham, and then some in Amity Park. Getting so close to him feels unreal.
And there by his side is the one and only Jason Todd, who isn't even trying to hide the bored look on his face as he watches Bruce interact with the other adults. He's gotten taller in the year they've been away, and healthier. His hair looks like its been cut professionally and he doesn't look as street kid skinny.
Danny's arm, hooked with Sam's, tightens up, and he resists the urge to rush forward and hug Jason. He watches Jason's eyes sweep left, away from him, and then right, towards him. The air stills for a moment as their eyes lock.
Danny grins toothily at him, lopsided and playful in nature, and sees the moment Jason processes the sight before him. His arm starts slipping out of Sam's at the same time as an ecstatic smile stretches across Jason's face.
His lopsided grin fills out on the other end. "DANNY!" Jason yells, cutting off whatever Bruce Wayne and startling everyone within earshot. There's barely a moment for Bruce to look down when Jason shoves past him and runs at Danny.
Danny yanks his arm out of Sam's, "JASON!" He yells with just as much enthusiasm, and Jason nearly topples them right over when he collides with Danny. His arms wrap around Danny's shoulders, holding onto him tightly, and they're both laughing, spinning around like tops out of joy.
"You didn't tell me you were coming!" Jason cries, sounding accusing. Danny hugs him just as tightly, and laughs when Jason pulls away momentarily to punch his shoulder.
"I wanted it to be a surprise!" He defends, laughing between words as their spinning comes to a stop. They're both reluctant to pull apart, but they do and clutch the sleeves of their elbows tightly. "How could my best friend be adopted by the Bruce Wayne and have me not come confirm it with my own two eyes?"
"I sent you newspaper clippings!" Jason says, narrowing his eyes while his smile betrays his face. Danny quietly notices that his Gotham street accent is faded slightly.
"Oh that's what it was?" Danny's grin turns again, edging into a smirk. He feigns innocence, "I thought that was fire kindling." He has the newspaper clippings hung on the corkboard in his room, proud beyond words about his best friend.
Jason punches him in the shoulder again, hard enough to leave a bruise. "You jackass." He says, ignoring Danny's laughter even when he's holding back his own.
There's a soft, sharp clearing of someone's throat, breaking their attentions away from each other to the one that made the noise.
Bruce Wayne was a tall man, taller than Danny expected, and he looks exactly like his billboards. If less promiscuous than his perfume ads. Danny expects him to be upset with them both for disrupting his pretty rich gala, but instead he just looks gently amused, with an arched eyebrow. Overall though, he just looks fond.
Danny would be the first to admit that Bruce had taken in Jason as a charity case, something to fill the void after his other kid Dick Grayson finally moved out. But Danny’s a good judge of character — or he likes to assume he is — and those are not the eyes of a man who would take Jason in as a charity case. Those are the eyes of a man who actually, genuinely, cares about one Jason Todd.
The wriggly protective thing settles in his chest.
He doesn’t let go of Jason, but he does twist his smile into something a little more polite. Mister Wayne’s eyebrow arches higher, and he turns his blue-blue eyes onto Jason. “Who’s this, Jason?” He has that fancy Gotham Elite accent -- something that sounds like a mix between old transatlantic and faintly British -- that Danny's only heard in passing when he and Jason snuck up to the nicer parts of Gotham.
Jason stares at Mister Wayne, his grip on Danny tightens as his eyes flick to the other onlookers in the room. “This is Danny, B.” He says once his eyes turn back to Mister Wayne. “We grew up in Crime Alley together, he moved to Illinois last year."
Danny can see the uncomfortable expressions cross every rich person's face, murmurs sweeping across the room as soon their uncomfortable gazes turned judgmental and flinty. He's kept track of the tabloids after Jason's adoption, the ones calling him a charity case and looking down on him for being a street kid.
He inches a little closer to Jason, straightening up instinctively, as if they were back in Crime Alley and facing a pack of kids that didn't like them. He can see Sam's surprised expression from the corner of his eye -- he never told Tucker or Sam about where he grew up, although he's sure they had their suspicions.
He looks back to Mister Wayne and meets his blue-blue eyes, his smile has slowly begun to fade. Mister Wayne doesn't miss a beat however, and his smile stays plastered to his face. If anything, it gets a little softer, a little wider. "It's nice to meet you Danny -- Daniel? I'm so glad that Jason has a friend here." He holds out a hand.
Danny eyes him unsurely, and then takes his hand. "It's jus' Danny, Mister Wayne." He says, some of his old accent slipping through as he shook his hand firmly. He would have done it harder, but this was Jason's new guardian, and from Jason's letters he didn't sound too bad. "It's, uh, nice to meet you too. Jason's told me lots about you."
Mister Wayne's brows jump momentarily, he looks intrigued. He looks between Danny and Jason, and claps his hands together softly. "Well, Jay, how would you like to stay with Danny for a while, hm? I'm sure you too have a lot to catch up on."
Hope simmers in Danny's heart, and he glances to Jason to see that same hope on his face. "Really?" He asks, and Mister Wayne nods with a laugh.
"Of course! How could I keep two friends apart? Go on ahead, chum. I'll come get you when the gala ends."
And just like that, Bruce Wayne leaves Jason with Danny, diving back into a conversation with one of the rich gothamites and taking the attention with it as if he were the sun and everyone else a planet orbiting him.
Danny and Jason share grins, and throw their arms around each other with laughter. Danny is on cloud nine, pressing his nose into Jason's shoulder and breathing him in, fingers digging into the back of his suit hard enough to leave wrinkles in his jacket.
Sam demands answers when they finally, for real this time, pull apart. Why didn't he tell her that he was friends with Jason Todd!? Danny slings his arm around Jason's shoulders and keeps him close, and tells her that it was because he wanted it to be a surprise.
Sam's parents have unreadable expressions on their faces, part greed -- Danny is their in to the elusive Bruce Wayne -- and part disdain -- a Gotham street rat. Danny ignores them, they're unimportant in the grand scheme of things.
He introduces Sam to Jason, and Jason to Sam. And off they go to a corner of the room near the buffet table where they can eat and shit talk everyone else in the room in peace.
At some point in the night Sam is called back to her parents to meet some other fancy rich kids her parents want her to get along with, and Danny and Jason go off to the west end balcony to avoid anyone who may try and approach the new Gotham ward.
Danny hops up onto the balcony railing, kicking his feet as Jason pulls a cigarette pack out of his inner jacket pocket, and grins. "Don't tell Bruce," he says, handing the box to Danny first. "He's been trying to get me to quit."
"Hah!" Danny takes one just as Jason slips out a lighter. "That sounds like Jazz. She's been trying to get me to stop since we moved to Amity." Granted, she's been trying ever since she found out before they moved, but now she was even more insistent. "She hasn't found my stash yet."
At the end of the night when the Mansons are leaving and Danny has to leave with them, he walks back to Mister Wayne with Jason to tell him that he's leaving. Mister Wayne mourns his going, and tells him that he's always able to come visit.
"Any friend of Jason's is always welcome to the manor." He says with a blinding grin, pulling Jason close to his side and squeezing him tight. Jason's nose scrunches up, but he doesn't push away.
It becomes a new routine for them. The Mansons are all too happy to bring him with to the Wayne Galas (of which they start receiving more invites to due to their connection with Danny) and Danny is all too happy to spend the evening with Jason again. No matter what, they always end up on the balcony at some point in the night.
And, eventually, Danny is invited to stay at Wayne Manor either for a weekend or for a break. He jumps at the chance when winter break rolls around and his parents start their debate over Santa Claus again.
Danny and Jason stay up late into the night talking or playing video games during their sleepovers, and in the warmer nights they climb out and onto the roof to stargaze. Danny points out constellations - - things he can find in neither Gotham or Amity -- and rambles on and on about space.
There are plenty of times during the Wayne Galas that the event gets attacked by a rogue. More often than he'd like he loses Jason in the crowd, and has later stopped Robin or Batman in his panic to find him.
The first time it happened, he was in tears with terror. He grabbed onto Batman's cape, stopping the man from going back in as he babbled that his Jason Todd was still inside, that he disappeared during the chaos and he couldn't find him. Batman took his hands and calmly told him that he'd find Jason for him, and that he was sure he was okay, but he needed to calm down.
He found Jason later once everything had calmed down, and he screamed at him for disappearing during a rogue attack, if he ever did it again he'll kill him. Then he cried.
The second time it happened, Danny didn't even realize that Jason was gone until everything was already over. They'd been separated before the attack happened. He stopped Robin and Batman before they could leave, trying to keep his breathing under control as he asked again, if they had seen Jason Todd.
"That- that asshole keeps fucking ditching me when these things happen." His voice has an embarrassing wobble in it. "Please-- please tell me you've seen him, that he's alright."
Robin this time steps up to reassure him, that Jason Todd was out of the building. He got him out. "He's probably looking for you too, uhhh..."
"Danny" Danny says, and eyes him up and down. "You're the new Robin right?"
Robin stilled up, and Danny could understand it a little. He'd seen the thoughts on the new Robin online. He wasn't very popular at first. Robin nods curtly, and Batman was shuffled a little closer to him, almost protectively.
Danny grins at him. "Cool." He says, "Me and Jay used to sneak out onto the rooftops sometimes to try and spot Batman and the first Robin, we made it a game." He holds out a fistbump, "Thanks for doing what you do, man. I might not live in Gotham anymore, but I mean it. You're a living legend."
Robin looks like there's something stuck in his throat, and after a beat he returns the fistbump tentatively. "Th- uh, thanks." He stumbles out awkwardly, and then turns away, "Me and B- uh, better go."
Before Danny could even respond, Robin already had his grapple in hand and was grappling away. "You too, Batman." Danny says before Batman can follow.
When Danny sees Jason after that, and weight lifts off his chest and he hits him in the arm again. And then complains that he should have gotten Batman and Robin's autograph, it would have been epic.
By the fifth time it happens, Danny is cussing up a storm when Robin saves him, cursing out Jason and claiming that he needs to put that boy on a fucking leash. "We're a duo!" He scowls when Robin gets him outside, "I got his back, he has mine! I can't have his back when he's got no back to fucking have."
The eighth time it happens, Danny gets held hostage by one of the henchmen. He's become a recognizable friend of the Waynes, and when the Waynes are nowhere to be found, then the next best thing was up to offer. Danny isn't even mad this time around -- just relieved that Jason was fucking off somewhere where he couldn't get hurt.
Robin, however, seemed furious when he arrived, and broke the hostager's jaw with a single flying kick to the face. Jason found him rapidly quick soon after the situation had settled, and apologized over and over again.
Danny slings an arm around his shoulder and laughs that it was fine, Robin saved the day! His legs were shaking with the worn off adrenaline, something he tried to hide from Jason. "I'm just glad it was me instead of you, Jay." He grins. Jason looks like he swallowed a toad.
Jason stops disappearing as often after that, sticking close to Danny's side until the attack was over.
When Danny is fourteen, Jason dies, and his world unravels.
He calls the manor on a late night in April after Jason had stopped responding to his texts. Danny knew that Jason was just recently in a fight with Bruce, but he knows that Bruce loves Jason. He would know where he is, right?
When he calls, Bruce answers with a hoarse "hello?" as if he'd been crying all day, and Danny's blood turns to ice. The anxiety he'd been feeling beforehand doubles in size, and he feels himself stammering.
"Mister- uh- Mister Wayne? Um, I'm calling because Jason--" he hears Bruce inhale sharply on the other line, and his anxiety skyrockets into fear. "--hasn't been answering any of my texts and- and I'm gettin' real worried."
There's silence on the other end, and Danny feels a rock forming in his throat, gross and heavy like he was on the verge of throwing up. "Mister- Bruce? Mister B?"
There's a shaky breath, and then Bruce's voice crackles through the phone. "Um-- Jason, he, he's--" there's a sound like rustling, "he's been killed."
Danny's vision whites out with skyrocketing terror, his mind skidding to a stop. His body rapidly grows hot, and then chills, like a blacksmith striking a heated weapon. "What?"
When the phone call ends, Danny screams himself hoarse. Jazz and his parents come running into his room, his parents equipped with ghost weapons. Instead, they find Danny curled up in his bed, sobbing hoarsely.
Danny almost -- almost -- refuses to attend the funeral, nearly paralyzed with grief. Jazz coaxes him to go, to find closure if anything else, and he drags himself out of bed to go.
He feels numb the entire time. It's closed casket, so he can't even see him for one last time before Jason is buried in the ground. He's silent, and if he think he looks bad, then Bruce looks even worse, like he hadn't slept since Jason died and worse.
Danny grabs his sleeve before he leaves, and when Bruce turns to him with a dull look in his once vibrant eyes, he clings to him tightly. And cries. Bruce clings back just as tight, Danny feels tears drip into his hair.
"Who did it." Danny whispers, voice too hurt to speak any louder, when he pulls back. His fingers curl around Bruce's jacket tightly, desperately. His eyes hurt with tears. "You said he was murdered, B. Please, who did it."
Bruce looks down at him, and for the first time it really does feel like he's looking down at him. His face is blank, and his eyes close in grief. There is no answer, a silent no.
Danny's face twists up all ugly like, and he shakes Bruce's jacket. "Bruce, please. Tell me who did it."
Bruce refuses, his face full of grief.
Danny never returns to Gotham.
Prior to Jason's death and post their reunion, Danny had slowly begun to improve in school. He started caring more, he was putting in more effort, he was doing his homework and was actually enjoying class. There was the bullying from Dash and the A-Listers, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle, he was ignoring them for the most part.
Come Monday after the funeral, and Danny breaks Dash's nose when he starts up with his shit. He withdrew into himself, and it was like he was back to square one again, except this time it was much worse.
Everyone knew Danny was close friends with Jason Todd. So when news of his death finally reached the ears of Amity Park, the students of Casper High School kept their distance.
That following Friday, Danny dies in the portal and comes back. A month later he becomes Phantom, the ghost-fighting ghost. the ghost Phantom wears his hazmat suit partially undone, showing a tanktop he didn't wear in death under the initial suit while the sleeves are tied around his waist. Vicious, glowing lichtenburg scars travel up his arm and neck and torso, covering half of his face while a pair of scientist-like goggles covers his eyes. He's bitter and angry, showing off his death.
Look at me, Phantom's form says, I am a dead child. Look at me look at me look at me. Mourn me. I am a dead child. LOOK AT ME. MOURN ME.
A few weeks later he enters the ghost zone and realizes that he could find Jason. And he spends a weekend scouring the ghost zone for him. He finds Gotham in the zone, and rather than finding Jason, he finds Robin.
Danny didn't know he'd died. And he flies towards him, asks him if he's seen Jason, reveals that it's him, Danny Fenton. Robin stares at him, mouth agape, and peels off his mask to reveal Jason Todd.
They both cry, and when Danny tells him how he died, Jason looks pale in the face. "You didn't- you didn't kill yourself because of me, did you?"
Danny fervently denies it. No, no. He didn't, he didn't. It was an accident. Totally unrelated. But enough about that, what the hell happened? Bruce wouldn't tell him anything at the funeral.
Jason clams up, his ghostly face losing its color, and Danny curses himself. He tells Jason that he doesn't have to tell him, he doesn't have to say anything. They sit in silence.
"It was the Joker." Jason says.
That's all Danny needs to know. He nods quietly. 'I'll kill him.' He thinks to himself, a stubborn set in his jaw. "Okay."
It had always been a plan; a thought wriggling in the back of Danny's mind ever since Bruce told him that Jason had been killed.
Not died. Killed.
Danny wanted the fucker dead the moment he realized it. He just needed to know who did it. He thinks Bruce knew it too, could probably see it in his eyes the moment Danny asked him who did it. He isn't sure if he should hate Bruce more for keeping it from him now.
They spend hours together, just soaking in each other's presence. Danny tries to take him through the ghost portal, to bring him back to the land of the living. But much like Kitty, Jason's form is tied to the zone. Danny promises to visit every day.
And he does. Or he tries to. The grief doesn't go away, but with the comfort of knowing that Jason was on the other side, Danny feels a little better. He tells Jason about being Phantom, and Jason helps train him. It feels like they're kids again and are fighting just because they want to. Its a bout of familiarity in a place that feels unfamiliar. All they need are cigarettes.
And then six months later he loses him again. Danny scours the ghost zone for him for the second time, and this time he doesn't find him.
His haunt is still in the zone though. He didn't move on. He's still here, somewhere.
Danny is convinced that Jason was in the Elsewhereness, and looks for him in between ghost fights and his social life. He visits Jason's haunt every day, knowing that Jason should be able to feel when another ghost enters his home. He does not show up.
(He never thinks that Jason came back to life, and Jason doesn't remember his time in the ghost zone)
When Danny is nineteen, Vlad Masters blackmails him into going to another Wayne Gala. Begrudgingly, Danny goes. He's taller than he used to be, having inherited his dad's monstrous height and his mom's leanness. He has piercings, some of them he got after a lost bet from Sam and Tucker, and he's given himself an undercut.
He still prefers vests over suit jackets, and he still smokes. A little less than before, he sneaks a pack into his pocket before he leaves, along with a lighter. Vlad gives him a dirty look the whole time - he knows.
"Don't give me that look." "That stuff kills, you know" "I'm already dead."
It's like deja vu when he arrives; an awful bout of deja vu, that is. The paparazzi is still as bright and loud and annoying as it always was, and they don't recognize him at all. Something he thinks of as a soft mercy up until one of the reporters asks Vlad who he is.
Vlad smiles and tugs Danny into the camera frame, "Why, this is my godson!" He crows, and shoots Danny a look that is downright smug I'm sure many of you may know him as Daniel Fenton?"
If looks could kill, Vlad would be ash. Danny isn't quite sure why he still agreed to this -- blackmail or no. He felt itchy being in Gotham; jumpy. He's never forgotten his vow to kill the Joker, in fact it was something he still desperately wants.
But the threat of Rath, the name he chose for his evil future self, haunts him just as much as his murderous intent. If he kills the Joker, would he stop?
Danny's almost afraid of what he'll do if he ever lays eyes on the Joker in person. He doesn't think he'll be able to stop himself from wrapping his hands around that stupid clown's neck and watching the light leave his eyes.
He pushes the thoughts to the side, and smiles lopsidedly as cameras and microphones flood his face, reporters yelling over themselves as they clamor to get a shot of the old Wayne family friend.
Danny turns and walks inside without answering a single question, flexing his fingers in and out of fists. Vlad gracefully hurries after him, and Danny can hear his glare burning into his back.
"You told me to come," Danny hisses to him once he's beside him, meeting Vlad's gaze piercingly, "not that I should play nice."
"Don't embarrass me, Daniel." Vlad hisses back, trying to look the upmost calm as eyes turn onto them. "I'll make you regret it."
"You embarrass yourself, fruitloop." Danny shoots back, walking away before Vlad could get a retort in. He sees Bruce Wayne on the other side of the room.
His heart seizes with nostalgia. He hasn't seen Bruce since Jason's funeral, hasn't spoken to him either. He doesn't know how to feel about him, but he'd been keeping tabs on Bruce both as himself and as Batman.
Danny's feet carry him forwards before he can think about it, silently weaving between the throng of rich people vying for his attention. It's only when he gets closer does he see the little shadow clinging to his side: Damian Wayne.
The newest little bird, Danny realizes, and stifles a smile at the surly expression on Damian's face as two older women coo over him. He reminded him of Sam, who had long since stopped coming to these things the moment she was able to.
The feeling of eyes on him turns Danny's attention away from Damian, and instead finds them back on Bruce's, who stares at him with a little furrow between his brows. As if he recognized him, but he wasn't sure from there.
Danny grins crookedly the moment he's within earshot. "Mister B!" He exclaims, slipping into what remained of his Gotham street accent. Recognition flashed in Bruce's eyes, and the man smiled widely. "Long time no see, old man."
"Danny," Bruce says, his name breathing out like relief. He slips between the crowd surrounding him -- who are now watching Danny -- and pulls Danny into a close hug. "It's good to see you again."
Danny hesitates for a moment -- he wasn't expecting Bruce to hug him -- and returns the gesture. "It's good to see you too, Bruce." He admits. Bruce was still using the same cologne that he did when Danny was a kid. He blinks heavily.
He pulls away quickly, clapping Bruce lightly on the shoulder as Damian quickly latches onto his father's side again. Damian glares daggers at him, fingers digging into Bruce's pantlegs like a possessive little kid.
He made Danny's ghost sense tingle in the back of his throat, creeping up slowly like a spider before stopping suddenly before it reached his mouth. It hummed, and then disappeared.
Danny smothered a frown. Since when did Batman work with ectoplasm? “This must be Damian." He says to Bruce, and holds out a hand to Damian -- he doesn't crouch, he had a feeling that Damian would be less than appreciative if he did that. "You've really expanded the nest since the last time I saw you."
Damian's eyes narrow at him. Bruce laughs lightly, "Ah yes, Tim is around here somewhere. I'm sure you'll see him soon."
"Father," Damian says, his voice layered with an accent. He glares up at Danny with piercing green eyes. "How do you know this man?" He sounds distrustful, Danny respects that and drops his hand.
"This is Danny Fenton." Bruce says, and Danny lets him introduce him. "He was Jason's friend."
An expression similar to bewilderment flashes briefly over Damian's face, and he eyes Danny in disbelief. "Todd had friends?"
Oh. So that's how he wanted to be. Bruce had a little elitist on his hands. Danny's smile drops like a deadweight, and any lingering endearment he had hardens like ice in his chest, fury slowly taking its place like a flickering candlelight. "It's not polite to speak ill of the dead, Mister Wayne." He says coldly, his voice made of chips of ice.
Damian blinks, the disbelief disappearing from his face. The closest thing to a recoil Danny thinks he's going to get. He doesn't care. No one speaks about his best friend that way.
"I grew up with Jason, actually." He continues, breathing in slow and deep, trying to keep the ghostly possessive-protective-rage under control. "I was his best friend."
He turns, almost robotically, towards Bruce, and tries not to look so angry. "I'm going to go find Tim, Mister B." He says, and tries to offer up a weak smile for the man. It comes out as a grimace instead.
"And..." he pauses, flicks his eyes towards Damian, and then looks at Bruce. "I'll... try and keep in contact, B. Tell Dick I said hi, alright? I'll see you in a little bit."
Bruce nods, looking vaguely disappointed and sighing slow through his nose. Danny walks away as Bruce turns to address his youngest, and doesn't bother listening in on what he has to say.
He does, eventually, find Tim Drake. He spots him in a crowd instantly - it's hard not to, and he makes his way over to him. He's not sure Tim Drake would recognize him, Bruce didn't at first and Danny had been around him constantly.
Except Tim Drake does recognize him, much to Danny's surprise. They lock eyes and Tim immediately makes his way over to him. "Danny Fenton!" He says and stops in front of him, "What a surprise, we weren't expecting you tonight."
"Tim Drake," Danny replies, smiling a little as his earlier hurt begins to fade away. "I'm surprised you know me."
"There are pictures of you in the manor with Jason." Tim explains, stuffing his hands into his pockets with an easy-going smile. "It's hard not to know you."
"It’s hard not to know you too,” Danny retorts, a sly smile slowly spreading across his face. “Although you’re a lot taller than you used to be, when you were lurking around Bruce and Jason and I.”
Ohhh Danny recognizes him alright. One part due to all the news articles and tabloids on him after he was adopted by Bruce, and the other part because he remembers the little shadow lurking near plants pots and table legs that used to follow him and Jason around at galas just like these.
Knowing that Jason was Robin, he wonders if Jason knew he was there too.
The effect is immediate: Tim’s eyes grow comically large, and a red tint glows at the tip of his ears as he shrinks back like a turtle trying to hide into its shell. “You— you noticed that!?” He hisses.
“I did!” Danny grins, large and wide, stifling a laugh as the red tint spreads over Tim’s cheeks and nose. He looks mortified. Danny coos. “Aww, I thought it was adorable that Jason had a little shadow. I’m sure he would have loved you if you had just come over and said hi. He had a big soft spot for kids.”
Tim snorts and it— it almost sounds derisive? “Sure he would.” He looks sad, and the mirth in Danny’s chest shrivels up like a flower without light. The smile fades from his face, and all that’s left is a strange, staunch reminder that Danny and Bruce weren’t the only ones that probably mourned.
He touches Tim’s shoulder lightly, “Hey, I’m sorry.” He says, trying to look as apologetic as he feels. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. I’m sorry, I miss him too.” Like a fucking limb he missed him.
There’s something that flickers in Tim’s eyes, passing through too fast for Danny to realize what it is. He assumes its gratefulness, because Tim relaxes a little and offers him a weak little smile. “I wish I had talked to him.”
Danny sees an out and takes it, he forces out a short laugh, grinning widely. “I can tell you all about him if you’d like,” he offers, “I told Mister B I’d keep in touch anyways. I’ve missed him and Alfred quite a lot in the last few years.”
“Not Dick?”
“That dipstick wasn’t around often enough for me to form any sort of emotional attachment to him.” Danny says in a half-complaining tone, placing his hands on his hips. “Although I did like his puns.”
Tim snickers, “I’ll tell him you said that then. Nobody likes his puns.”
“Go on ahead,” Danny grins, laughter swirling in his chest and making his core thrum with warmth. Damn, he’s missed this family. “I stand by my decision. Puns are funny.”
“Let’s get a photo then.” Tim says with a hand already fishing in his pocket for his phone. “He’ll be devastated to know that you were here and he didn’t get to see you.”
“Sure.” And Danny sidles on next to Tim, throwing an arm around his shoulders — and making a noise of surprise when his arm was able to fit comfortably — as if he was just resting it on a counter.
He totally forgot how tall he was compared to Tim. Forgot that he’d been looking down the entire time they’d been talking. “Why’d I get my dad’s height.” He complains, and bends his knees as Tim raises the phone with the front-facing camera on.
Tim snickers under his breath, and takes the picture while they’re both smiling wide. Danny immediately stands up, and peers over Tim’s shoulders to look at the picture.
It’s a good one, with the fringe of Danny’s curls falling slightly over his left eye and making the dimple on his right cheek more prominent. He could see the barely-there smattering of freckles he had across his nose, the ones that became more prominent when the sun was out. His smile was lopsided, Danny’s favorite kind of smile.
He whistles lowly, “That’s a good one,” he says aloud, and smiles impishly at Tim when he looks at him. “You should send that one, I look hot in it.”
Tim snorts, his ears reddening as he looks down at his phone. “Yeah sure, no problem.” He says quickly, and Danny looks away when he pulls up the messenger app. He’s never felt comfortable looking over people’s shoulders when they were on their phone.
“I’m gonna go take a smoke break.” He shoves his hands into his pockets and curls his fingers around the box and lighter inside. “I’ll—“
“Be on the west-end balcony.” Tim finishes, the red in his ears darkening as he glances up from his phone to smile embarrassedly. “I know.”
Danny snorts, “Okay.” His voice is thick with amusement. “Let me know how Dipstick reacts, alright?” He backs up slowly, awaiting Tim’s response. Tim merely waves a hand at him, a weak gesture of “yeah yeah” that makes Danny grin before he flips around and marches towards his favorite smoking balcony.
———————
(Tim pulls up the family group chat and loads the selfie into the text bar. His face feels warm with embarrassment even as his thumbs fly across the screen.
Tim: look who i found at the latest charity gala :) [image]
Hee awaits eagerly a response, and finds he doesn’t have to wait long. Dick’s thought bubble appears on screen, then Cass’s — of which it only exists for a moment before disappearing.
Dick: holy shit, is that who i think it is?
Tim responds quickly, and his message sends.
Tim: yep. He wanted me to tell you that he thinks your jokes are funny.
Dick: they are funny
Tim rolls his eyes and thinks for a moment, really thinks. He weighs his pros and cons. And then his fingers fly across the screen again.
Tim: hey Jason are you not gonna say anything?
There’s no response for all of thirty seconds — of which it stretches on to an uncomfortably long minute — and then Jason’s thought bubble appears.
Jason: what do i have to say to a bunch of idiots blowing up my phone in the middle of patrol?
Tim: harsh. do you recognize the guy in the photo?
Jason’s response is instant. Too fast for him to have actually looked at the photo itself. He’s just trying to spite Tim then. Tim doesn’t care, he has the upper hand here
Jason: no and I don’t care, i have patrol
Tim knows he didn’t look at the photo, and yet he can’t help stifle a shit-eating smile and feign innocence
Tim: really? You and Danny used to be so close, color me surprised
His teeth dig into his lower lip, he doesn’t need to in order to hide a smile. But it gives him something to do. Jason is worryingly silent for a long, long time, and Tim can almost imagine him staring long and hard at the selfie. Tim knows he will be later.
Finally, Jason’s text bubble shows up. It exists for a long time, before finally Tim’s phone buzzes with his message alert.
Jason: that’s danny?
Tim feels all too gleeful. Smugness swirling in his chest like kicked up sand as he types his response: yep! Apparently he showed up today, although I’m not sure with who since I don’t see Miss Manson around here.
Damian: Father says to get off your phone, Drake. We are at a Gala and your behavior is most unbecoming
Tim: can it demon spawn, I was just telling Jason that his friend Danny is here
Damian: He can’t be too important if he doesn’t even know Todd is alive
Tim: how would you know that?
Damian: When Father introduced him as Todd’s friend, I expressed my surprise that Todd even had friends, considering how unpleasant he can be. Fenton became quite cross with me after that and quickly excused himself thereafter
Dick: you said what!? Damian that’s not okay
Damian: Father made that quite clear after Fenton left in a huff. My mistake for thinking that Todd had told his ‘supposed best friend’ that he was alive.
Dick: he didn’t even tell us we were alive at first
Damian: He did eventually, didn’t he? Clearly Todd doesn’t seem to care too much about Fenton if he hasn’t even informed him of his being alive at this point.
Jason’s thought bubble quickly pops up, and then dissipates, then pops up again. Tim quickly pockets his phone before he can see Jason’s response. He doesn’t feel smug anymore, just uncomfortable.)
———————
Stepping out onto the west-end balcony feels like a blast from the past. A painful one at that. Danny’s fingers dig into his cigarette pack, and he pulls it out with a sense of bittersweet familiarity.
It feels like a lifetime ago that he once stood here with Jason. The package clunks dully as his fingers scrape against the side, and he fishes a cigarette out of the box before stuffing it back into his pocket.
“Quite the night isn’t it.” He says to nothing, to ghosts of the past, to himself. He turns and sits on the railing, sticking his legs out like a tripping hazard while Gotham’s hot city wind blows through the air.
He looks up and only sees the ugly pollution yellow sky looking down at him. It’s an unfamiliar feeling to him. He loves the stars and yet when faced with a smog that covers it, he feels more at home.
Danny’s fingers find the lighter, and with a few clicks a small open flame appears in existence. There’s a poem here, he can feel it. But he feels too tired to find it.
The cigarette lights, and the lighter dies in response. Returning back to his coffin-like pocket until he needs to use it again. He pulls a leg up, resting his chin on his knee with a heavy, tired sigh.
He soaks in the sounds around him. The ugly city warmth nips at his jaw. The music inside is muffled by the force of two glass doors and walls on all four sides, and Danny can hear late night traffic coming by on the road nearby. It’s a special kind of ambience you can only find on the west end balcony.
Half a decade ago, Danny had played a part with that ambience with Jason. Now it was just him, and Jason was nowhere to be found. It left a hopeless kind of feeling in his chest. An all-suffocating kind of fear that filled him head to toe with an intensity only ghosts could have.
His body winds up like a spring, and Danny holds his breath. When he exhales two minutes later, the spring stutters and jolts, and his body relaxes with a tremble.
He misses Jason. He misses Jason.
Ghosts are emotional creatures. They feel it from their crown to their soles. And emotional wounds never really heal. They scab over and fester, waiting to be picked at again and again so it can bleed as fresh as it did when it first opened.
Danny’s grief is never going to go away, he thinks. It’s clung to him like a parasite; shaped him and molded him. The wound was too close to him when he died, and now it will stay with him forever.
He opens his eyes when his ghost sense tingles, a heavy feeling in his throat that is neither nicotine nor grief. It’s just like Damian’s, but stronger. Potent. Older. It reaches the top of Danny’s throat and sits at the base of his tongue, like a hand about to suffocate him.
He looks up, cigarette hanging off his lips, and the Red Hood drops down beside him. He stands in the same spot Jason once did, and that alone makes the ghostly core in Danny seize possessively.
Don’t you dare stand where he stood, it hisses, coiling around his lungs like smog. Danny grits his teeth and feels his ghost sense evaporate. He pulls the cigarette out of his mouth, and nicotine smoke pours out like a cheap version of his ghost sense.
“Red Hood.” He says plainly, his free hand coiling and uncoiling like cat’s claws against the railing. “A surprise to see you here.”
Danny knows through process of elimination who most of the Gotham vigilantes are: Dick is Nightwing, Bruce is Batman, Tim is Red Robin, Damian is Robin, and Cass is Orphan. There are a few who he doesn’t know, however. Like Batgirl and Red Hood.
It’s fine, he doesn’t need to know. Danny of all people understands the importance of a secret identity.
Red Hood doesn’t say anything, just stares at him as if he’s a deer in headlights. His body all tensed up like he isn’t sure what to do now that he’s here in front of Danny. Like he wasn’t expecting Danny to be here at all.
Danny’s brows furrow. “Sorry, am I in your spot?” He asks, and begins to push off the railing. “I didn’t think vigilantes used the Wayne Hall west-end balcony, I can leave if you want.”
He’s already begun to move towards the door.
The Red Hood lurches in his spot, “No!” He yells, and Danny stops in place with raising eyebrows. Red Hood’s fingers cringe, and he straightens up.
He’s shorter than Danny, he notes. Which isn’t much of revelation. Everyone is shorter than Danny.
“No,” Red Hood repeats, sounding sturdier than before, “No. You’re fine. I’m just stopping here for a quick rest before resuming patrol.”
…Danny doesn’t question it. It’s none of his business about other vigilantes and their practices. He shrugs and breathes out more smoke, “Alright.” He says, and walks back over to the railing to sit on it. “I’m Danny, by the way.”
The Red Hood nods, and a silence falls over them. Danny doesn’t care enough to make it feel uncomfortable, but the Red Hood seems unsettled by something. Lost in thought. He leans his back against the railing similar to Danny, and then switches a few seconds later to a new pose.
He does it again, and again, and again. Until finally he flips over and leans his stomach against the railing, arms resting against it. It is starkly like what Jason used to do, and Danny stares at him long and hard.
He frowns. And says nothing.
When Danny’s cigarette is nothing more than a butt of nicotine, he crushes it in his hand and watches the ash flutter down to the ground. The heat stings his hand, but its nothing his ghostly healing can’t fix.
The Red Hood is already holding out another one when Danny’s hand drifts to his pocket for the box.
Danny stares at him, sudden wariness opening up like floodgates that sit at the bottom of his stomach.
His frown deepens, his eyes flicker up and down at Red Hood. His hands hover over his pocket. “I have my own.” He says, and watches subtly as the Red Hood hides a wilt. As if he’d been expecting Danny to take it.
“Alright.” The Red Hood says, trying to sound unbothered. He retracts the cigarette away from Danny, quiet all the way. He’s looking away.
Danny plucks the cigarette out of his hand, startling the Hood enough that Red snaps back to look at him. Danny yanks his lighter from his pocket. “I won’t say no to a free cigarette.” He says, slightly muffled with the stick between his teeth. It lights.
Silence falls over them again, and when one minute stretches into five, whatever hope that had been digging into the shoulders of Red Hood finally pulls away and leaves him slumping subtly.
‘A ciggie for your thoughts?’ Nine year old Jason Todd whispers one night with an impish grin, holding up a cigarette pinched between his two fingers. ‘I stole it from my old man. He won’t even notice its gone.’
Danny is halfway through it when he speaks. “The Joker killed my best friend.” He says, and watches from the corner of his eye as the Red Hood flinches. Is he startled by Danny speaking, or startled by the bluntness of him starting?
“He beat him to death.” Danny continues, staring stone-faced away from Red Hood. His grief claws up his lungs and burrows into his heart again. His fingers dig into the railing. “He beat my best friend to death.”
The Red Hood is silent, his body as still as the grave. Silence stretches out between them both, and like he’d been thinking, the Hood finally speaks: “How do you know?”
He’s not holding the cigarette, he broke his and Jason’s rule. Danny bounces the stick between his fingers. “His ghost told me.” He says, taking a trembling breath. “His ghost told me so, before he disappeared.”
The Red Hood says nothing, and Danny gathers his thoughts. The ones that had been buried deep next to his core, shoved down ever since Danny learned of Rath and a terrible future where a world is destroyed by one ghost’s hands.
Danny has never said it out loud before. His face scrunches up briefly, and then smooths out when his eyes squeeze shut. “I’m going to kill him, Red Hood.” He murmurs when he opens his eyes, turning his face toward the vigilante. The sound is sucked out of the air.
The Red Hood stares at him, but he doesn’t say a word. Danny pushes on, teeth grinding into teeth as he flips his silvery scarred hand back and forth. Palm up, palm down. “It’s why I haven’t been back to Gotham in a while.” He admits, voice still quiet. “If I see the Joker I will kill him, and I won’t feel bad for it.”
“Not today though,” he says, and closes his hand, “today I’m here on a favor to Vlad Masters. Then after this I’ll go visit my friend. I need to apologize for not seeing his grave in a while. I’ll have to stop by a florist to see if they have any zinnias. Jay likes those.”
He takes out the cigarette in his mouth and breathes out one last cloud of smoke. And then he crushes the cigarette stick under his foot and walks back inside.
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tsurugis · 11 months ago
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Speaking of DID lol I’ve never talked about this here but I’ve actually suspected I have DID or somewhere high on that spectrum for fucking ages right. lol. I’ve done a massive fuck ton of research on it over the years but I hadn’t had any obvious related shit happen for a few years until recently and now I’m like :) I fuckin see. Because I had this Massive breakdown when I was moving with my husband and i couldn’t get my horse cutie in our trailer because she was too big skjhskj like she was trying but it was a no go so we had to hire someone to transport them and it was expensive as hell lmaoooo a whole lot of other shit was going on but that was some kind of tipping point. I lost my shit in the hotel like completely and then just blanked the fuck out completely. Now looking back between that time and a few months ago it’s like the vaguest memory and me now I feel like the person is unrecognizable in the weirdest ways. But I also know that whatever the fuck was going on during that time I would look or think back at old stuff from before like through social media and be like Who The Fuck Is That. But me now?? Recognizes it perfectly. A few months ago I was hanging out in town with my husband and for no apparent reason I felt like I was suddenly thrown into reality and I had a completely different sort of breakdown for a week that wasn’t bad? It was just this feeling like I could suddenly feel again and everything was so strange and new and it was like I suddenly loved everything and everyone again lolllll. I act completely different than I had been for a while so effortlessly and like for instance I had been completely intolerant of my mother in law and like enraged by her all the time and just generally fucking weird to me now. I vaguely remember feeling so. Fucking done with her and incapable of keeping those feelings down, when before I was incredibly tolerant. It’s like I thought I had just gotten fed up but when I felt that switch that day so randomly now I’ve been consistently tolerant of her again sjkhskjsh instead of bottling up rage it’s like oh. that hurt my sensitive ass feelings that’s okay I’m gonna do my best to moderate and reassure her instead and then go and cry alone dkjndjk. and just a thousand times more tolerant in general which is how *I* remember always being. But those vague *memories* of feeling a different way only seemed to clearly remember being that different way. And like a different set of legitimate childhood memories paired up with the different set of current behaviors? It’s fucking hard to explain and I keep thinking it has to be nothing but I also know it’s in line with a way DID can be. It’s not always that “classic” version which is more rare. it’s fucking distressing because I always end up with this sense that I could disappear when I don’t want to because I like being the way I am but I’m so. Fucking. Sensitive. In a different way than what I think are clear other parts of myself. But *I* think it’s better to be that way but I’m thinking other parts might be saying hell no and kicking me out or something?? It so hard to explain but I’m starting to be able to pin down where I think switches have happened in this weird way. it’s really confusing and it’s always been a huge source of stress for me but like *big shrugs* I’m really naturally touchy feely and excitable and empathetic. I think whatever part was out was *trying* to be that way but failing miserably and hated it kfjhfkjfh and you could say I was just going through a period of being triggered but it’s not like I don’t get triggered off my ass all the time I just react a completely different fucking way. I’m starting to see a clear pattern and it’s wild to me.
My brother has always complained about it weirdly. He’ll be like “yeah when you did this” and it will be the most mundane fucking thing and will have been from like only days or weeks ago where I should remember it perfectly fine and I don’t and he’ll get pissed cause he thinks I’m lying about not remembering when I seriously do not fucking remember lmaooooo and it’s understandable!! Cause it’s always some big clear recent thing that anyone would remember lol Hell
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yaysandnays · 2 years ago
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recovering documentation
this blog is another branch off of @ohmygodletmesignup (the other one being @amethyst-beetle ). i made this blog to document my process of recovering. i suppose this post will be my little introduction.
TW for mental illness, sh, and su!c!dal thoughts discussion
hi. i'm Calisto (Cal) or Beetle (Bee). i'm 16 years old and writing this on 4/2/2023 (or on april third if you give me a few more minutes). i'm currently trying to recover from depression, anxiety, and what i've been told is likely ptsd. i'm going to give an extremely watered down version of how i ended up with all those.
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basically, before 7th grade started (i was 12ish), my mom, sister, and i moved to a whole new place bc of a job offer my mom got. that meant i had to start a new school, and the only good schools in the area were private catholic schools. so i went to one. now i was raised some flavor of christian, so catholisim wasn't too bad for me (at first). but everything quickly went downhill.
i made one extremely toxic friend after two weeks of extreme anxiety, and she didnt help my mental health in the least. after about a year with her, i was constantly on the verge of having panic attacks. literally every single day.
then, in 8th grade, my school made an openly homophobic move. i was questioning my sexuality at the time, and this didnt help.
finally, at the end of 9th grade, we moved back to our old town where we still live today. i was 15.
finally i could actually be openly transgender (trans guy, he/him) and bisexual for the first time ever. my anxiety and depression disappeared so quickly it was shocking. but some things stuck, things i didnt even know.
it was mild at first- and i didnt even know anything was wrong. sometimes i would be walking down the hall of my new school and see someone who looked similar to someone at my old school. it would make me question things, and i wouldnt be able to figure out where i was. it was a pretty easy fix though, just a few minutes and i'd be fine.
then it got so much worse.
i was in choir, and it's a tradition we sing hallelujah every year (though since it was my first year there, i didn't know lol). so our director gives us the music, and just reading the words makes me start to bounce my leg (something that means im either energetic or anxious). then we started singing. and i couldn't handle it.
i started shaking, a lot, and i had to tell the director whilst on the verge of tears that i couldnt do it. he excused me and i spent the rest of class in another room just trying to calm myself down.
'you're safe' 'you're ok' 'you're safe i promise' is what i told myself over and over and over again.
during the concert when we got to that song, i was excused.
then my mom tried taking my sister and i to a christmas mass a few weeks later. i lasted five minutes before i had to go to the bathroom where i spent the rest of the hour sobbing through a panic attack, trying to convince myself i was ok.
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TLDR: catholic school, toxic friend, religious trauma
so that's what happened, now here's where i am.
i haven't hurt myself in over a year, maybe two now, and it's been at least a year since i've had a suicidal thought. i've found a lot of my triggers and can avoid them too, which is nice. i havent had a relgious trauma fueled panic attack in a while. i also have a therapist who listens to me.
i think it's also important i set some goals for myself too. and i think two are good for now.
write a post when i get unstable so i dont do anything bad
update this blog at least once every two weeks
i also want to make this blog for people going through the same things im going through now or went through. i promise it'll get better, and we can do it together.
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leviathans-watching · 3 years ago
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taking the blame for barbatos, beel, satan
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includes: barbatos, beel, satan x/& gn!reader (no pronouns mentioned)
wc: 1.1k | rated t | m.list | part 1
warnings: curse words, light angst, lying
a/n: @tehsammutna requested a part 2 to taking the blame woth these characters. i hope you enjoy!! my inbox is open to chat, leave feedback, and req so come say hello! also, my laptop is currently broken and my school computor has tumblr blocked so i have to copy/paste on my phone but i think i’m figuring out a sytem lol
please reblog!!
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➳ barbatos can’t even think. thousands of years of perfection, all for him to screw everything up in the end. he can’t beleive his stupidity.
“barbatos?” he flinches when you touch his arm, and you pull your hand away apologetically. great. now he’s even making you feel bad. “is everything okay?”
“um.” he wets his lips nervously. it’s just you, you who he should be honest with. “you know the gala that’s coming up?”
“you mean the one next week? of course, that’s all anyone’s been talking about.”
he flinches again, and your brows furrow with concern. “i screwed up.”
“what are you talking about? surely it can’t be that bad,” you try, but he shakes his head.
“it is, mc. it is that bad. i forgot to get caterers and now it’s way too late to try and set anything up, because everyone’s booked out and it’s such a big job.”
“i’m sure we can try to find someone,” you say. “i’ll bet a smaller business wouldn’t mind the grind, especially since this is such a big event. we’ll work something out.”
“what happened?” diavolo’s voice startles the both of you, and barbatos feels the blood drain from his face. “why do you both seem so worried?”
barbatos goes to speak but you beat him to the punch. “barbatos-” you start, and he swallows nervously. “-assigned me to get caterers for the gala but i totally forgot. i am so sorry, we’ll figure it out, i promise.”
diavolo frowns slightly, looking between you and barbatos. “oh no. please try to get the situation sorted out. and mc, it’s a good thing this got caught now. a mistake like that surely would have hit the papers.”
“right,” you nod. “sorry.”
diavolo’s name gets called and he smiles at barbatos before walking off, disappearing once more. barbatos heaves a big sigh of relief, ready to thank you, but you’re already on your d.d.d. looking up catering companies.
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➳ satan grimaces, looking at the mess in front of him. he’d only been intending to look at one of the records in lucifer’s collection, for research purposes, but it had been in his hands-off section, meaning it was booby-trapped.
probably for mammon, though lucifer’d be displeased to find anyone touching his things. and while satan shouldn’t care what lucifer thought, he’d been finding himself wanting to keep things civil between the two of them, if only for your sake.
thiss would surely set thigns back.
“what was that crash?” you ask, walking into the room. “oh my god, satan, what did you do?”
satan looks at you, a little defensive. “i only wanted to look at one of the records.”
“but why? and how did that lead to this?” you gesture at the mess in front of him, eyes wide.
“it’s rumored the album art includes a sign that’s part of an online mystery surrounding the artist,” satan explains, “and i think lucifer has everything booby-trapped in here to keep it safe.”
“okay,” you say with an exhale. “so what’s the plan, here? we can’t just leave it like this.”
“i don’t know,” satan says reluctantly. “i don’t want to touch anything in case it makes it worse or sets off any more of the traps. he’s got hexes and curses weaved in there that i only barely deflected.”
you mutter something under your breath that sounds like ‘stupid paranoid bastard’, making satan smile.
the moment is broken as satan hears someone coming through the door, but thankfully it’s only mammon.
“whoah,” he says, sticking his hands in his pockets. “the hell happened here?”
“it’s my fault,” you say. “i got mixed up in here and forgot that this is the off-limit section of the music hall. thankfully, satan saved me from the traps.”
“bro,” mammon says. “lucifer’ll be pissed. but thankfully you're okay. it’s a good thing satan was there, as those are some nasty curses. i wouldn’t even go near ‘em.”
satan only barely manages to nod. you’re taking the blame for this? why?
“well, lucifer should be more grateful i’m alive,” you sniff. “imagine if it had been his magic that finally did me in.”
“don’t even joke about that,” mammon wails, and satan knows he’s been properly distracted.
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➳ beel holds the broken figurine, biting his lip. levi was going to be so mad.
“beel, what’ve you got there?” you ask, looking over at him. wordlessly, he holds up the pieces and your face falls.
“is that levi’s one-of-a-kind ruri-chan figurine he’s been looking for forever?” you ask, and he nods.
“i didn’t mean to,” he explains. “i sat down without looking and it broke.”
you click your tongue. “well, if he wouldn’t leave his stuff where people sit this wouldn’t have happened. levi’s not going to be happy.”
“i know,” beel says glumly. he hates getting into fights with his brothers. “i feel really bad about it. if only i had paid more attention…”
“do you think it’s fixable?” you ask, moving closer, but both of you know it’s not.
“no, i don’t think so. what should i do?” beel asks, feeling anxiety creep into his stomach, curdling the hunger.
“about what?” levi asks, breezing into the room. the both of you freeze. instantly, levi’s eyes move from your guilty faces to beel’s hands.
“what! is that my one-of-a-kind priceless collectible ruri-chan figurine?” levi asks, not waiting for an answer. “how could this even have happened?”
beel feels terrible, dread coursing through his body, before he can work up the nerve to explain himself, you speak.
“levi, i am so sorry! i found it and was coming to find you when i tripped and dropped it. i never meant to break it and feel terrible! what can i do to make it up to you?”
levi softens faced with your wide eyes, shoulders slumping. beel wonders if it’s truly okay for you to take the blame for the situation but figures it’s already been done so there’s no going back on it. you shoot him a reassuring look and beel decided to go along with it.
“there’s not anything you can really do,” levi says sadly, and beel winces. “but thank you for telling me.”
he carefully takes the peices from beel’s hands, morosely examining them. while he’s distracted, you slyly take beel’s hand. squeezing it. beel doesn’t know why you lied for him, but it was ultimately your choice to do, so he squeezes back, gratefully. he still feels bad, but at least levi’s not mad at him, nor does it seem he’s mad at you.
resolving to try to find a replacement ruri-chan figurine even though no doubt it’ll be really hard, beel decides to try yo put the situation behind him.
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leviathans-watching’s work - please do not copy, reply, or claim as your own
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vilsoo · 2 years ago
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prize counter girl ☆ five
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➥ michael afton x camgirl!reader
you've been a camgirl for only a few months and everyone loves the content you post. when michael afton porn surfs to relieve his stress, he comes across your videos. the more he jerks off to your content, the more he's addicted. but it wasn't until, a few months later, he sees your familiar face as the new employee working at the prize counter.
chapter warnings. video chat sex reminiscing
notes. pcg is back yay !!! 🥳 i’d also like to say that the setting of our pizzeria is kind of a mix of dave n busters and the mega pizzaplex from fnaf sb. the arcade is rlly huge and colorful so like why not lol
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pcg materlist • previous • chapter six
tags. @sanzu-s @matchakittycat @chiroomii @woahhajime @astrobunny @icekreamcakeee @aftonpartner @erensslutt @halparkebitch @i-am-scared-and-useless-bisexual @roody-y-a @setethstuff @akazxii @queen-simp @mikeesz @yukkomi @milk-bulb @ghostisinvis @corrazon @soft-spirit-ren @jaeeeeeeyito @wh0rephobic @mochas-rambles
  Michael wanted to disappear the next morning at work.
   Just for a few weeks of maintaining a restorative and healthy sleeping schedule for his new day shift, he had to fuck it all up again. Another sleepless, dreadful night. All because of steamy video chat sex with you. But he decided you weren't at blame for this. It's all his fault for going down this rabbit hole. Getting fucking corrupted by a camgirl that breathes the same air as him now; he did all of this to himself.
   Tossing and turning, complicated thoughts racing erratically, shirtless and sweaty, flipping the pillow multiple times, shifting positions, craving for a sip of his water, feeling a constant discomfort, and the never ending flashbacks of you. With his struggle to fall asleep, it was all futile.
Michael couldn't keep his eyes open the whole morning. He knew it would be dangerous for him to drive at a drowsy state like this. So to make his morning much more worse, he called William to drive him to work.
Hearing his father babbling and getting mad for sleeping late drove Michael to pass out right on the passenger seat, his head slanted against the window and a bit of drool hanging off his bottom lip like a little kid. It wasn't until he was startled by him "accidentally" driving over curbs and not giving a shit about it.
When he arrived at the pizzeria and into the arcade, he noticed the lights were already on at the prize corner and the display shelves were mostly organized. The glass showcase counter was also cleaned. His gaze drifts to the opened prize stockroom, sauntering over to see you squatting down at the lower shelf to shove a box of candies in place.
Noticing his figure at the corner of your eyes, you turn at him and smiled. You were like a ray of sunshine pouring over him, a brief feeling of bliss washing out his exhaustion. Of course it had to be you making his rough morning feel slightly better.
   "Hey. I came here a little earlier but you weren't here, so... I reorganized the candy island and cleaned mostly everything here. You okay?"
He cleared his throat, almost caught staring at you once again. "Yeah. Why— why wouldn't I be?"
"Um, you look dead." You stood up before him with your gaze wandering over his face, causing his heart to involuntarily pump faster.
   Michael sighed. "Yeah, I didn't really get enough sleep last night. Didn't even have enough time or energy to fix myself so that's why I look like shit today."
"Aw. I'm sorry about that," you pout. "But you don't look that bad. I mean, I looked way worse after my first hangover, so..."
He chuckled lightly, catching a glimpse of his smile that looked adorable to you. "I just... I wish I was here earlier to help you."
   "It's okay. I can take care of it from here," you assured, mirroring his smile coyly. "I think you should be checking the games. You're a maintenance guy, remember?"
"You bossing me around now?" he teased sarcastically as he pressed his shoulder against the doorway while folding his arms. "Can't believe the new girl on day one is telling me how to do my job."
   "Well. I was gonna say something else about how messy your hair was," you teased back.
   Michael scoffed as he raked through his hair with his fingers. "Okay, yeah. I think we should get back to work now."
   He makes way for you out the door, his gaze furtively following your figure moving past it made him hold his breath. The more your voice reverberated in his head, the more his heartbeat accelerated. It was something about the way your tone shifted coquettishly as if you were sweet talking him over the phone. The way your body inched ever so slightly closer as you playfully teased him.
Michael watches everything about you as if he was going to get quizzed on it. But there was something else lingering in his head that he couldn't wrap his finger on:
Were we flirting?
As the question remained unsolved, Michael started his day by performing the daily minor repairs on the game machines. He removed obstructions, repositioned mechanisms, and observed the machine operations to determine any malfunctions. So far, all game machines were fully functional and allowed for the point system to operate. Meanwhile you were counting the cash at the register, keeping track of merchandise inventory, and ensuring that all shelves and displays were maintained.
Thirty minutes before opening time, Michael spent it by playing the Super Shot game. With many thoughts running through his head, nothing could distract him from his winning streak and being skillful at basketball. As you were roaming about the arcade, you finally find him. You quietly watch from behind at how fluid his upper body movements were when he scores, completely stunned at his winning streak and his ability to never miss a shot.
"Wow. You're good at that," you complimented as you stood beside him.
Michael's body seized for a moment when he finally sees you, deeply flattered that you've been watching him play. "Uh— I'm just, you know. Testing the game, that's all. Does the prize corner look good?"
"Yeah. I think we're ready to go," you bantered.
The brunette man sighed down at himself, glancing at the Super Shot panel then furtively back at you. Suddenly, a random idea came across him when he picked up the Fazbear game card.
"Hey, uh... Before we go— 'cuz we only have twenty minutes— do you wanna see the secret technique for this game?"
Your eyebrows raise at him. "There's a secret technique? Like some kind of hack?"
"Mhm. It's the fastest way to get a lot of tickets," he asserted with a smirk, lowering his head and his voice to a whisper. "Don't tell anyone, though. I just know some cool hacks for a few games here since a lot of this shit is rigged. I can show you if you want."
You chortled at him. "Of course I wanna know! Show me, please."
"Alright, alright." Michael chuckled as he swiped the card. He spoke as he demonstrated the steps to you. "Basically with the Super Shot game, after you swipe your card, press 'continuous' mode. When you play, don't try to get as many points as you can. Just get up to 42 points and then don't score anymore. When it's done, it should be looking like this and now you have infinite tickets..."
Every shy glance of his just lands back on your eyes as if he'll never land at anything more enticing. He could speak all day, elaborate about some arcade hacks like a nerd and let his mouth run while his brain goes crazy over you.
I can't believe I was so tongue tied yesterday with her. Now look at me— all confident and talkative this morning. But yet, I'm still nervous...
"Man. If only I knew about this like way back then at this other arcade," you bantered. "Would've been very helpful winning this one prize I've always wanted."
"What was it?" Michael asks.
"It was a jumbo Hello Kitty bear plush. I think it was around thirteen thousand tickets? Can't remember, but I was very dedicated on winning it."
Hello Kitty bear plush... I'll keep that in mind.
Michael suddenly glanced down the row of arcade machines and noticed William. He was passing by to supervise the place and keep everything organized before opening. The man halted when he caught glimpse of the two of you together.
"Michael. Y/N. It's almost 10 AM," he called out. "Be where you need to be before a customer walks in."
"Yes, father. We'll be on our way." Michael shoved the game card in his back pocket and adjusted his uniform, sighing in dismay that he didn't get to spend more time talking with you.
   "So... you're not gonna be with me at the prize counter the whole time, right?" you asked as you walked beside him down the arcade machines.
  "Sadly not. My father put me in charge of a lot of things downstairs and upstairs. But don't worry— I think you can handle it without me," he reassured with a small smile.
   For some reason his reassurance and comfort enlightened you. Ever since your first time meeting Michael and spending more time together, you became very fond of him. You credit his ability to connect, communicate, and be understanding of each other's strengths and limitations. Hell, he's a very attractive employer as well. Maybe once or twice you've stared into his features when he's looking away. He almost looked oddly familiar to you, as if you met him somewhere else before, but couldn't quite put your finger on it...
   "Aw. I mean, yeah I'll be fine," you beamed. "Thanks for everything."
   Michael mirrored your smile, having another thought surface in his head. "Of course. And uh... if you want, during our break... do you want to play some games together?"
As if your smile just couldn't get anymore wider across your face it made your cheeks ache. "That would be nice! You're so sweet, Michael. Like, literally the sweetest manager ever."
He chuckled it off, staring down at the ground while trying to conceal his reddened face. This amount of boldness and confidence was never brought out of him before it was unbelievable. Trying to make a move on you, hinting his interest, and still putting more effort on trying to get to know you. It was a whole lot of progress compared to his resurfacing agitation and guilt yesterday. Even though his morning started off on a bad note, it gradually became better just like yesterday.
He had no idea how he did it. How he managed to be at ease and subsiding his nervousness. But as he tried to keep it up throughout the day, a new wave of guilt took over impulsively.
Michael couldn't keep staring at you while you were at work. Seeing you accompany the customers with their candies and prizes while leaning against the glass counter like that... your elbows pressing down, your arms relaxing on the surface, and your back arching slightly with your ass sticking out. As if you wanted him to see you like that from this distance; upstairs at the lounge area overlooking the pizzeria arcade.
   He thought about the webcam sex you had with him last night. How you fingered yourself on your knees with your ass in the air. How much of a slick mess the both of you were. Your pretty cunt glimmering with your pussy juice from the sunset lamp lighting. As if he was staring at some magical oasis, basking in your seduction, melting at the sounds you make, and set ablaze from how insane you make him...
   I was doing so good earlier. Now I'm fucking horny at work again.
Fantasies could only, unfortunately, remain as fantasies for Michael. When he's so fond of someone, specifically you, he'd hide away in his forbidden fantasies. Crushing over you that he's so curious about gives him a feeling of wanting to hide. Hide away in a safe place in his mind, imagining the infinite outcomes of fake scenarios.
   What if I tell her?
   What if I just tell her I'm Mike Shmidt?
   What if, the more we get closer and closer throughout the days, I finally get it out of my system?
As much as Michael yearns for an opportunity to admit his truth and couldn't keep hiding this shit anymore, he's a coward deep down. He wonders about your reaction. How you would be able to process this information without ruining your work relationship. And hopefully not lead more suspicion to William, who already saw the both of you conversing and giggling together instead of working. But first, he needs to test the waters.
   I wish I can be as bold as her and have no shame about what I do behind closed doors...
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ALL WORKS BELONG TO VILSOO © . do not steal, plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my works outside tumblr.
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just-call-me-angel · 3 years ago
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Clever Girl
Chapter 5 - The Power of Killing
Warnings: All chapters after this point will contain spoilers!! graphic depictions of murder, edward is a lil creep who thinks killing is a good form of seduction and i kinda love him bc of that
Author's Note: I apologize that this took so long, I have been sister struggling with this chapter omg I ended up making it more of a filler chapter bc i was struggling so much, I promise the next chapter will be better and will contain smut lol. No riddle this time because my brain hates me :( riddles will continue in the next chapter <3 Good job to everyone who got the last riddle correct btw!! The answer was Power! Ily guys so much and I appreciate the continued support
Summary: It’s a bit of a shock when you hear about the Mayor’s death the day after Halloween, but you couldn’t exactly say you were all that torn up about it. Men like him spent most of their lives getting rich off of killing people like you– it was really only fair if they shared the same fate–hell they probably deserved worse.And worse was exactly what Mayor Mitchell got.
Chapters: || 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 ||
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Living in Gotham had always been interesting. Though the longer you live in a city like Gotham, the more interesting became plain fucking annoying. And you’d lived in Gotham all your life so you’d pretty much seen all there was to see.
That was until you started talking with Edward Nashton. He made everything interesting. You’d never met someone quite like Edward. You hadn’t yet decided if that was a good thing or not.  
But you liked the addition of Edward being in your life. Knowing you got to see him when you got into work gave you something to look forward to. You’d spent most of your living day today out of pure spite but now you had Edward and his riddles to get you out of bed. 
It’d be even better if he got you into bed though.
You’d only been talking to the guy for a few weeks and already you wanted him bad. Real bad. 
You wanted to believe that he wanted you just as badly. But Edward wasn’t always easy to read. Despite his awkward fumbling, Edward was meticulously careful about what he let you learn about him. 
Sometimes you’d catch a glimpse behind his carefully constructed mask. 
He’d get frustrated if you didn’t understand one of his riddles and you’d watch as his eyes darkened at you. “You’re not stupid. I know you can figure it out.” You’d blink and he’d be back to his usual self, smiling sweetly as he offered to repeat the riddle. 
It probably should have scared you. 
Unfortunately, you’d never been a very good judge of character.
Sometimes you felt scared for him though. He’d been saying odd things and giggling to himself and changing the subject with a riddle if you asked him any questions.
He’d disappear for a few days without warning and then come into the diner like he hadn’t been driving you up the wall with worry. Eventually, you gave him your phone number. He’d been so confused when you passed him a little note with your number carefully written beneath your name. 
“You’re giving me your number?”
You laughed, despite being a bit annoyed with him, “Yea, maybe shoot me a text next time you decide to disappear without warning.” 
He looked confused for a moment and then smiled at you, a mischievous glint in his eyes, “You were worried about me?” 
You snorted, “Of course I was… Besides, how am I supposed to solve your riddles if you aren’t even here to ask me them?” 
You’d never seen Edward get so red in your life.
At first, he used your number sparingly. Still, you took the chance to message him whenever you could, even when you knew you’d be seeing him later. You asked him about his day, told him about the next-door neighbor who always played his music obnoxiously loud, and sent him pictures of the stray cats that lived in the alleyway next door. 
It helped for a while that you could message him when you were taking a different shift or you were taking a day off of work but Edward wasn’t as forthcoming. Most of the time his responses were either one-word responses or his usual cryptic riddles. 
He was awful at updating you if he decided not to come into the diner. And you tried hard not to feel hurt by it– he had no commitment to you after all—but it wasn’t easy.
Gotham wasn’t exactly the kindest place to people like him–you knew that firsthand. 
So it worries you when you don’t see him for a few days and he stops returning your texts. Normally he’d come in late at least and apologize profusely for keeping you waiting. But you were receiving complete radio silence from him now. You were starting to wonder if you’d done something wrong.
But living in Gotham also meant you didn’t always have time to worry about your own bullshit. You had to work, pay your rent, and try to drown out the constant stream of news stories about poor men, women, and children dying in the streets because of rich pricks who wanted to make a quick buck.
It’s a bit of a shock when you hear about the Mayor’s death the day after Halloween, but you couldn’t exactly say you were all that torn up about it.  Men like him spent most of their lives getting rich off of killing people like you– it was really only fair if they shared the same fate–hell they probably deserved worse.
And worse was exactly what Mayor Mitchell got. 
It really should have made you feel at least a little horrified to find out he’d been violently murdered in the safety of his home. But it didn’t. In fact, it thrilled some twisted part of you to know he’d suffered. 
You almost wished you had been there to see it. Of course, you didn’t say that to Darcy or any of your coworkers when it came on the news that night during your shift. 
“Oh that poor family,” Darcy said, shaking her head as she listened to the reporter on TV go over the case. You looked up from where you stood at the counter, trying hard not to roll your eyes when the screen showed Commissioner Pete Savage standing in front of the Mayors home droning on about how terrible it was to have lost a man as incredible as Mitchell. 
Darcy pats your back and shuffles past you, “Alright hun, im gonna head on home, do me a favor and ask Chris to walk you home tonight, I don’t want you walking alone knowing there’s some maniac out there.” 
This time you did react, snorting, “Do I look like a corrupt official to you?” 
Darcy turned back to look at you, brows furrowed, “(Y/N) this isn’t something you should joke about.” 
You lower your head, “Sorry Darce.”
She sighs and shakes her head, “Just promise you’ll ask someone to walk you home–for my sake please” 
You catch her gaze, and any intention to argue with her leaves you instantly when you recognize the exhaustion and worry in her eyes. 
You muster up a smile and nod, “I promise.” It's a lie–just like all the times you’d promised to quit smoking–a lie she readily accepts with a tired smile as she moves towards the door, gathering her purse against her hip as she does.
“Maybe ask that sweet boy you seem so smitten with to walk you home.”
You stumble, just barely catching yourself from falling. You hear her chuckle, and the bell of the door chime, and by the time you look up, she’s already out of your sight leaving you huffing as you stare at the puddle of coffee that you’d spilled onto the floor. 
Of course, she knew teasing you about Edward would get you all flustered. You couldn’t hide anything from Darcy, no matter how hard you tried. 
You sigh looking around, thanking your lucky stars that there aren’t many customers left in the diner this late at night. You grab the closest towel and set the half-empty coffee pot aside on the counter as you slowly sink to your knees to clean up the mess.
The bell chimes and you almost expect to hear Darcy’s honey-sweet drawl. Instead, you hear the quiet tap of shoes on the tiled floor and the rustle of paper against the counter. A customer—Great.
You don’t look up as you continue cleaning up the spill, “I’ll be with you in a moment.” you call behind you, receiving no response except silence at first.
You grab another dish towel, bending forward a bit more to mop up the last of the spill. You can feel someone watching you and ---fuck you really should have worn a longer skirt to work. 
“People make me, save me, change me, raise me. What am I?” 
Shit—
You yelp, scrambling to stand up, face bright red as you look up at Edward. He tilts his head at you, giving you a teasing smile. You huff at him, crossing your arms, “Edward!-- give a girl a warning before you sneak up on her.” 
He laughs a bit, “Sorry I didn’t mean to frighten you.” 
Fucking liar.
You can feel his eyes dragging down your body, catching on your exposed thighs beneath your slightly bunched-up skirt. It’s stupid but you let your hands fall to your skirt, fingers toying with the hem of it for a moment, and—fuck—the way Edward’s breath catches in his throat has you feeling a little dizzy. His cheeks go pink when you finally brush your hands over your skirt to flatten it back over your thighs.
You stare at him for a moment just taking in the sight of him. He looks nervously up at you, cheeks flushed as he gives you a small smile. You fight the urge to smile back at him, reminding yourself that you hadn’t seen him in a few days and he’d been avoiding answering your texts. 
You cross your arms, “Where have you been anyway?”
 His smile falls and he bows his head sheepishly. After a minute he takes a breath and looks up at you again, smiling, “People make me, save me, change me, raise me. What am I?”
You raise a brow at him, placing a curled fist over your hip, “Edward come on you had me worried–”
Edward shakes his head, clicking his tongue, “Answer the riddle and I’ll explain” You pout at him but don’t argue, rolling your eyes a bit at Edward’s cryptic nature. God, you really wish it was easier to stay annoyed with Edward. 
With a sigh, you grab a clean mug and set it down in front of him, carefully pouring coffee into the mug, “You want a slice of pie again? We still have some of your favorite left from the morning crowd.”
He nods, quietly thanking you and you shuffle off to the kitchen. Chris is sitting on an upside-down crate screwing around on his phone and nearly jumps out of his skin when you tap his shoulder.
“Fucking hell– (Y/N) I thought you were Darcy coming to kick my ass.” He pouts when you laugh at him, patting his arm and shaking your head at him. 
“Chill out, Darce went home a little bit ago, I just came to get a slice of pie for Edward” 
He nods, passing you a clean plate to put the pie on, “Edward? You mean that freaky guy who's always doing puzzles and shit?”
“Edward’s not a freak, don’t be an asshole Christopher.” You hiss, cutting a slightly larger slice of pie and placing it on the plate for Edward. 
Chris laughs, leaning back against the counter, “I didn’t realize you two were on a first-name basis with the guy” He pauses to open the fridge, allowing you to grab the whipped cream, “Ya know if you keep spoiling the guy with extra pie and shit you’re gonna give him the wrong idea.” 
You shrug, trying to hide the blush rising to your cheeks, “Shut up or I’ll tell Darcy you’ve been joining me on smoke breaks again.” 
He snorts, raising his hands in mock surrender, “Jeez no need for the threats (Y/N)” he pauses for a moment and then his eyes go wide as if he’s realized something important, “Holy shit–you like him don’t you?”
You nearly drop the plate, turning around to look at him, “What–no–”
He shakes his head, laughing, “No no– don’t deny it now (Y/N), you like him– I never pegged you for the girl to go for guys like him.” 
You pout, crossing your arms, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 
He raises a brow at you and snorts, “Come on– you are way out of that guys league–and besides he’s kind of creepy– the guy is always staring at you.” You glare at him, grabbing the plate and shoving past him. 
He stumbles a bit and sighs, “Wait come on– (Y/N) I’m sorry–I didn’t mean it” you pause at the door to look at him, “I’m just being an ass. I’m sure Ed’s a cool guy–” 
“Edward” you correct with a stern look.
“Right–” he pauses, rubbing the back of his neck, “Just be careful, there’s a lot of creeps in Gotham ya know?” 
You sigh and manage a smile, “I appreciate your concern Chris–really I do—I’ve lived in Gotham long enough that I think I can handle myself, okay?” 
He nods, “I know you can” he pauses and offers you a sheepish smile, “We cool?” 
You take a minute, resting the plate against your hip and pressing your index finger to your chin as if deep in thought for a moment before grinning at him, “We’re cool–just quit being such an asshole all the time, yea?”
He gives you a cheeky grin, “ You’ve got yourself a deal if you let me bum a cigarette off of you.” 
You snort, “I thought you told Darcy you quit.” 
“And you tell her you’re gonna quit every other week and yet here we are.” he retorts.
You shrug, setting the plate down on the counter for a moment while you dig into the front pocket of your apron, “Fair point.” you chuckle as you pull out the half-empty pack, slipping two cigarettes out and passing them both to him. 
He gasps with a mocking shocked expression, “Two whole cigarettes? Must be my lucky day” You roll your eyes shoving the pack back into your pocket and picking the plate back up, turning to push the door to the dining area open again. 
Edward barely acknowledges you when you set the plate down in front of him, too distracted by his daily crosswords. You smile fondly, watching as he carefully pencils the answer into a row of boxes with a pleased little giggle. 
After a moment, he glances at the pie, brows furrowing a bit as he looks up at you, “This slice is bigger than normal.” 
Of course, he would notice something like that.
You shuffle nervously in front of him, “Oh? I uh–I didn’t even notice.” 
Nice, that’ll definetly convince him.
He stares at you curiously, and you suddenly feel far more exposed than you had earlier with your skirt bunched up. His lip twitches and he smiles at you, giggling a bit as he drags the plate closer to him “Pumpkin pie is my favorite, you know.” 
You nod, fidgeting with the end of your apron, giving him a nervous smile, “Really? It's my favorite too.” 
He looks up at you again just as he’s swallowing the first bite of pie and offers you a quiet hum of approval before replying, “Do you remember the riddle I gave you before?” you shake your head and he smiles, pushing his glasses up his nose, taking a deep breath before he repeats the riddle for you, “People make me, save me, change me, raise me. What am I?”  
You sigh leaning over the counter a bit, unbothered by the way Edward’s eyes catch for a moment on your slightly exposed cleavage–you’d caught him staring more than a few times since meeting him and you’d be lying if you didn’t encourage it a bit by leaving a few extra buttons open on your shirt. 
People make me, save me, change me, raise me. What am I?
You thought on the riddle for a bit, glad to have Edward sitting in front of you again after days of worrying over him. You really hoped he had a good explanation for his disappearance–though you doubted you’d be able to stay annoyed with him even if he didn’t—still you’d probably remind him that he had a phone for a reason. 
You took care of a few customers as you pondered over the riddler. It can’t be children, that’d be too easy, you thought as you poured a fresh cup of coffee for a young man working on his laptop in one of the corner booths. The answer finally came to you as you were gathering the measly little tip one of your regulars had left you at their table. People make it, save it, change it and raise it. The answer was money.
You stuff the crumpled-up cash and loose change into your apron, gathering the dishes off of the table as you shuffle back towards the counter. You smile at Edward as you pass, stepping into the kitchen quickly to place the dishes in the sink. You roll your eyes when you notice the backdoor is cracked open and you can see a little cloud of smoke meaning Chris is probably taking a quick smoke break. 
You can almost hear Darcy scolding you in your head as you walk back out into the dining area. You stand in front of Edward, tapping the counter to get his attention as you lean towards him a bit, “The answer is money.” 
His face spreads into a smile as soon as he hears your answer and he claps his hands excitedly, “Correct! You’re getting better at these, Clever girl.” 
Christ the things you’d do to hear him praise you like that all the time. 
You giggle, combing a hand through your hair as you beam at him, “You think?” 
He nods, “Of course I do.” he pauses, just staring at you and you feel your cheeks going bright red, “Would you like another riddle?” 
You have to fight the urge to say yes when you remember that he had promised to tell you where he’d been if you solved the riddle. You shake your head pouting a little,  “Not yet, first you have to answer my question, remember—”
“Hey, sweetheart!” an older man calls interrupting you before you can get an answer from Edward. You look up at the man at the other end of the counter, sighing when you recognize him as a regular—one who you had reminded on multiple occasions not to call you sweetheart. 
“I’ll be with you in a moment Mr. Seavers,” you say, forcing a polite smile as you look over at the balding man and then back at Edward.
Edward isn’t looking at you when you turn back to him. He’s staring directly at the other man, jaw tensing until he looks back at you with a strained smile. 
You muster up a nervous laugh, “Sorry about that–”
“Sweetheart come on I ain’t getting any younger over here.” 
You sigh, glancing at the man again, polite smile no longer gracing your lips, “Please Mr. Seavers I’ll be with you in one moment–”
“I’ve told you to call me Jimmy, sweetheart.” 
Edward tenses again in front of you, and you squirm a bit watching his eyes darken as he stares at the man. Christ, it should not be turning you on to see him look like he’s two seconds away from lunging at the man. 
You brush your hands over your apron, smiling at Edward and offering him a brief apology before shuffling over to the man, “Mr. Seav– Jimmy what can I get for you.” 
“I’ll take a refill on my coffee and a slice of pie sweetheart.” 
You bite the inside of your cheek glancing at Edward for a moment and then back at Jimmy as you pour fresh coffee for him, “I already served the last slice of pie.” It's a petty lie but you really don’t give a shit–you just want to finish your shift and talk to Edward—and dealing with Jimmy and his usual bullshit was keeping you from doing that. 
He curses and offers you a smirk, reaching out to touch your hand for a second before you can pull it away, “That’s alright sweetheart, getting to see you is a treat enough for me.” 
You’re stomach turns and you yank your hand back, “I’ve told you before Jimmy, don’t call me that.” 
He chuckles as you walk back to Edward and you resist the urge to rush into the kitchen to scrub your hands clean. Edward glares at Jimmy for a second, fingers curling into white-knuckled fists on the counter. You reach across the counter and place a hand gently over his, smiling at him when he finally looks up at you. 
“So–What have you been up to?” you ask, tracing a circle over the back of his hand until he stops clenching his fists. His eyes shift back and forth for a moment between you and Jimmy before he finally sighs, and fixes his glasses as they slip down his nose.
“There was a work emergency that required me to work extra hours. I apologize if I worried you at all.” 
You recognize a well-practiced lie before he even finishes the sentence. It annoys you a bit but in your experience, things like this were usually best left alone. Besides, he seemed genuinely sorry that he’d worried you. And it wasn’t as if you’d never lied to him before so really you had no room to judge him. 
You shrug “It's alright, just text me next time” you squeeze his hand with a teasing smile, “That’s why I gave you my number remember.” 
His face flushes and he laughs nervously,” Yea—I’m sorry about that too—I’m not—uh—not used to having someone worry about where I am I guess.”
Oh. Well, now you definetly couldn’t be annoyed with him.
You squeeze his hand again, “Well now you have me,” 
He smiles, avoiding your eyes as he turns his hand over to hold yours for a moment, “And–and you have me.”
You don’t tell him how much you’d be willing to do for him—and neither does he. 
You nod, a little distracted by the way his hand feels in yours, long fingers tangling with yours. He has the hands of a pianist, with long fingers and pale knuckles. There are scars on his hands, mostly along with his fingertips and the backs of his hands and knuckles. You don’t need to ask where they came from—you’d lived in Gotham long enough to know what kind of scars came from living on the streets—Lord knows you had your fair share of them. 
You brush your thumb over his knuckle, he tenses a bit like he’s worried you’re going to ask him about the scars and you smile, “Do you have any more riddles for me?” 
—- Edward’s POV —
Edward hated avoiding you. But balancing his life with you in it was becoming increasingly difficult. You were a distraction— and as much Edward wanted to welcome that distraction he also knew he had a job to do. It was better to avoid you for periods of time. It kept you both safer– at least until he was sure he could bring you into his life completely. 
It helped that he had the cameras in your apartment to watch you at least. He hated seeing you look so sad whenever you tried to message him and he left you on read. But he told himself he’d make it up to you in the end. 
He just needed to finish the first part of his plan and then he could watch Gotham tremble in fear for a while and allow you to distract him again. Hopefully by the time he needed to complete the next step he’d be able to show you his true face. Then he wouldn’t have to hide from you. 
Besides the thought of seeing you again was a decent motivator for getting rid of the Mayor as soon as possible—if he was lucky he’d soon have you and the Batman on his side and then he’d be unstoppable. 
It took everything in him not to message you as soon as he finished setting the scene in the Mayor’s study after killing him. He wanted to show you his work—he wanted you to admire it —he wanted you to tell him clever he was for putting this all together. 
He went home that night and barely made it through the front door before dragging his pants down to his knees and stumbling to his desk to watch you on the monitors. He didn’t know if it was the adrenaline from having just killed a man or the thrill of imagining how you would react when he finally showed you his true face, that had him half-feral as he came into his hand—it was probably both. 
He hardly slept that night knowing he’d get to see you again. He’d have to ask you what you thought about the Mayor’s death—he needed to know that you understood how much men like Mitchell deserved to suffer—he’d make you understand if he had to. 
The next day when he walks into the diner and he doesn’t see you he worries that you might have called in and decided not to tell him. He’s pleasantly surprised when he finds you behind the counter, bent over cleaning up a coffee spill— especially when he’s got a nice view of your baby blue panties. 
Silly girl, you really should be more careful what if someone saw you like this and decided to take advantage. 
He snaps a few pictures when he’s sure no one is looking at him—he doesn’t even worry about the four cameras arranged around the diner, you’d already told him that the one pointed at the door was the only one that actually worked. He very nearly had to rush off to the bathroom again when you finally stood and gave him a bit of a show as you fidgeted with your skirt.
He feels guilty when you admit to being worried for him and has to remind himself several times that there’s a reason he can’t tell you the truth yet. He’d never been the patient type. He’s glad at least that you don’t pry, accepting his excuse even though he’s positive you know he’s lying. 
It’s incredibly easy to slip back into his usual routine with you, teasing back and forth and chattering over pie and coffee. It reminds him why he needs to be patient. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like other customers have gotten the memo that it’s Edward’s time to have your attention.
“Hey sweetheart, turn up the tv would ya!” 
Edward has no idea how you manage it but you take the man’s insistent prattling in stride, showing hardly any signs that it bothers you. He notices the slight twitch of your jaw tensing and your hands curling into fists at your side but he doubts that anyone else notices it. It makes his blood boil to think you have to deal with people like this every day and he wants desperately to take you away from it all. 
Soon—I’ll take you away soon.
It doesn’t help that Jimmy’s flirtatious comments give way to jealousy that rages in his belly. It’s stupid—he had no reason to be jealous of the man—it was pretty clear you didn’t like him. Still, it makes his stomach twist in anger watching the man interact as he owns you—like he deserves to even breathe the same air as you. 
It makes him want to put the mask on again and teach the man a lesson—now there’s an idea. 
He wonders if you want to watch the man bleed out as much as he does— he imagines you want it more than he does—he wants to give you that—he wants to set you free in the way he had been set free.
He wants to show you the power that came from ending someone's life.
“Come on sweetheart hurry it up–”
You offer the man a polite smile, picking up the remote and quickly turning up the volume a few clicks until Jimmy gives you a wolfish grin and a wink, turning to watch the tv. You cringe, shivering as you turn back to Edward, smile a little tense, “Sorry–would you mind repeating the riddle?”
It takes him a minute to reply, too lost in his thoughts, deciding he’d pay Jimmy a visit later in the night so you’d never have to deal with him again. He grins at you after a moment, “ Some try to hide, some try to cheat, but time will show, we always will meet. Try as you might, to guess my name, I promise you'll know when I come to make my claim. Who am I?” 
He likes watching you think about the riddles so hard— he likes that you put effort into trying to please him. Plus it gives him a little time to plot against the man at the other end of the counter who keeps eyeing you up when you aren’t looking. 
You find the answer to the riddle just as Edward is gathering his things to leave, “Death, the answer is Death, right?” you ask eagerly looking at him.
He grins, nodding enthusiastically, “I told you, you’re getting better at this Clever girl” 
You clap your hands, pleased that you’d made him proud and he chuckles placing an extra tip on the counter before you can argue, “I’ll see you again tomorrow.”
You tilt your head at him, hands on your hips, “Promise?” 
He grins, “I promise.” You seem convinced, hands falling back to your sides as you beam at him, watching him gather his things, and tug his jacket over his shoulders. 
Edward is pleased to find that Jimmy stays a little longer than him, giving Edward the perfect opportunity to follow him home. He wishes he had the forethought to grab his mask before leaving home earlier—but a part of him is glad he doesn’t have it—he wants Jimmy to recognize him in his final moments. 
Jimmy is foolish and arrogantly unaware of his surroundings, completely missing the soft tap of Edward’s shoes against the damp pavement as he follows him. It’s not the same as when he follows you home or when he tails one of his targets as the Riddler—but it’s thrilling all the same.
He’d normally hate to do something without weeks of planning–too many things could go wrong—but he couldn’t get himself to step back when it came to someone posing a threat to you. 
It was easy to catch the man off guard and shove him into an alleyway nearly a block and a hlaf away from the diner. The man stumbled, crashing forward into the ground with a grunt. He was a little larger than the Mayor so he worried for a moment he might not be able to overpower him. The man staggered, attempting to look back and Edward shoved his boot into the man’s gut, giggling when the man curled into himself with a choked gasp.
Edward let the man lay there for a moment as he looked around the alley for something to hit him with. He couldn’t help the wicked little grin that formed on his face when his eyes landed on a glass bottle. He swiped it off the ground quickly, twisting it in his hand with a look of glee as the man turned to look at him.
“What the—”
Edward swung the bottle into the side of the man’s face, giggling when the man yelped as the bottle shattered, shards digging into his face—and fuck the sight of the blood beginning to drip down the man’s forehead was enough to send Edward’s heart racing. The man hit the ground again, hands reaching up to cover his face as he began to cry.
How fucking pathetic.
The man began to crawl away, dragging his legs on the ground in a desperate attempt to escape the fate he knew awaited him, “ple–please.”
Edward grinned, letting the man drag himself further into the alleyway. He stalked after him, swiping a loose metal pipe off of the ground as he crushed the man’s left ankle beneath his boot. 
The man yelps, twisting to look up at Edward again, “Please—please just let me go.” 
Edward clicks his tongue, tilting his head down slightly at the man, “This wouldn’t have happened if you would have just left her alone.” 
“Wha–what? What—what are you talking about?” 
Edward doesn’t answer, swinging the pipe hard against the man’s face, giggling when he hears the sickening crack of the man’s jaw dislocating.
The man chokes on a scream, incoherent cries for mercy being drowned out by the blood filling his mouth,”pl-plea--pleas–”
Edward swings again, this time a little harder, relishing in the sound of the man’s face hitting the pavement. The man tries to speak again but no words come out, only choked little cries of pain. 
Edward lets the pipe crash against the man’s head again, and again and again until he stops hearing the man’s pathetic cries for mercy, and even then he keeps bringing the pipe down until the man’s face is barely recognizable. He’s got blood spattered on his hands by the time he lets the pipe clatter to the ground.
He stands there, chest rising and falling with quick heavy breaths as he stares down at the body. He should feel disgusted as he looks upon his work–-but all he feels is a wave of power.
He crouches, digging his hands into the man’s pockets and dragging his wallet out, flipping through it for a moment before pocketing it. He’d already made it nearly impossible to recognize the man, so taking his wallet was only a secondary precaution–though with the murder of the Mayor the GCPD would hardly be worried about some lowlife getting his head bashed in.
He couldn’t deny the benefits of the corruption in Gotham allowing him to slip through the cracks without raising suspicion. 
It takes him a moment to drag the man further into the alleyway, and he sobers for a moment as he shoves the body into a pile of garbage, tossing loose trash bags and cardboard over it. It wouldn’t keep it hidden forever but it’d given him a head start if the cops wound up investigating further-–if he was lucky they’d shock it up to the murder of a homeless man and the investigation would be lost in a sea of unsolved cases. 
He takes his time walking home, giddy and overjoyed with the knowledge that the man would never again bother you— he had protected you—and one day he hoped you would thank him for that. 
Tag List
People I couldn't tag will be bolded in green@toy-cars-and-grape-juice @kidswildworld @angelbabyivy @gvf-court @vincentiz @goldenmay @rerorero-my-cherry @ihaveaproblem98 @qardasngan @space1boy @riddler-simp @chubbyb3an @psychadelichues @crayolahandsanitizer
(I apologize in advance if i missed you!)
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burnedbyshoto · 4 years ago
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the bodyguard
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— Kirishima gets assigned to be the bodyguard to one of the worlds greatest idols: you. —
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pairing: bodyguard!kirishima eijirou x idol!reader
warnings: nsfw, 18+, brat taming, authority kink, spanking, blowjob, slapping, choking, brat taming, brat!reader, modern!au, no quirks, bodyguard!kirishima, idol!reader, PTSD portrayal, anxiety, war flashbacks, implied minor character death, drugging, alcohol consumption, size difference: kirishima is 2 feet taller than you, regardless of the reader’s original height. If you’re 6 ft congrats he’s 8 ft.
word count: 20,500
a/n: this is for the bnharem collab.... im so sorry, it’s 4:30 am and I have a plane to catch in 2 hours to get back to school. thank you jo for proofreading this for me because lol I am a mess. if the paragraph spacing did not work as I wish it does, please let me know so I can go in and edit in visible paragraph spacers!
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“I’ll be okay.”
The smell of dirt, sweat, and blood clung to the air.
The sun was setting, its blood-red shine illuminating against the destroyed earth, making the already bloodied soil even bloodier. 
There was no telling if the land was quiet, if the reason why the world's silence was because the world just for this moment had gone silent, or if the earlier explosions were still ringing in his ears.
Kirishima sat wounded, his back pressed to the wall, his eyes wide, breathing erratic. He can’t move, can’t bother picking up the gun that lays abandoned by his knee as warm, sticky liquid spills onto his clothed knees and continues to soak the fabric of his jeans.
What had he done?
What in the fucking world had he done?!
BOOM!
Kirishima stills, his eyes stilling on the floor and looking at the clear moisture. He doesn’t need to touch his face to know it’s a combination of both sweat and tears. 
His ears sing with white noise, the erratic beat of his heart, and his pained breathing.
“I’ll be okay,” the ghost taunts his mind.
But I’m not okay, Kirishima tries to speak, but knows with how his tongue is sitting like a thick dried sponge in his mouth, he won’t be able to speak. Pushing off the cold floor, flops onto his back, his arm flinging over his closed, shaken eyes until the ringing in his ear disappears into his alarm clock. 
05:30.
Kirishima lays there for a bit more, his chest still heaving heavily with the weight of lead.
Inhale.
Hold.
Exhale.
Better?
No, not yet.
Kirishima runs through breathing exercises, his chest never stopping in it’s hiccuped, broken pants as his memories continue to haunt his mind. If only he was smarter, more observant, better.
“Time to get up, time to get up, time to get up,” his phone screams with his second alarm set at 06:45. The sound does what it’s intended, jolting Kirishima out of his own head. His labored breathing shallowing just enough for his lungs to finally grasp ahold of its required function.
Today was an important day for him; he needed to be on his tiptop game, according to what Toshinori said yesterday.
I’m okay, he convinced himself as he does every morning after having this dream. Kirishima flings his arm off his eyes, the morning purple sun shining softly through his blinds. I’m okay.
Date: 4/2 Time: 08:00 Location: UA Services
“And in other news, music industries princess Y/n has been attacked by yet another round of masked perpetrators. Fortunately for the music idol, she was left unhurt but was clearly rattled. This is but the fourth attack on Y/n since three weeks ago. It’s leaving many of us fans, spectators, and civilians wondering just what is being done to ensure her safety? Y/n is reported to not have a single bodyguard to her name, wanting to quote-on-quote ‘experience her fans to the fullest’, but with these recent attacks, we can’t help but hope something is done. At least until something is done about these attackers—”
Kirishima’s eyes tore away from the screen, his lips pressed into a deep frown as he took in the story. There was deep worry about it, not only because he hated the idea of people getting hurt, but because he was a big fan of yours.
Your debut album had come out during his training camp for the military. Not only was it an instant billboard smasher breaking every standing record, but his commanding officers were obsessed with the album and played it continuously until they graduated. Most of Kirishima’s comrades came to dislike your music solely because they remember throwing up, bleeding, and suffering while you sang about love and whatnot, but Kirishima? Kirishima fell in love.
It was a bright spot in his life, and he was grateful for your music, even if it has been ten years and six albums since the training camp.
“Yo, Kiri!” a voice cheered out happily as a hand clasped onto his shoulder from behind. Kirishima held the flinch that threatened to rip through his bones. Kirishima turned to find Kaminari grinning up at him, a cup of steaming tea in one hand as he grinned brightly at his coworker. “I heard you’re finally getting a good case today!”
Kirishima found himself relaxing at the sight of his rather spontaneous friend, a warm smile easing onto his face as he raised his fist for a greeting fist bump.
“We’ll see, I know Toshi’ said it was going to be important, but he also said escorting the paranoid old lady was important,” Kirishima sighed, his smile softening a bit.
Kaminari laughed, his arm slinging around Kirishima’s shoulders as he remembered that.
The little old lady was sure that the government was out to kill her and wanted protection until her son returned from his vacation. Needless to say, Kirishima had thoroughly enjoyed his time with her, even if she was a bit scary. It was a low-risk job, and he only was paranoid by her cane, which she used to thwack his back many times as she talked about how plums extended your life.
“God, I remember subbing in for you for one hour because of your family emergency, and she was so scary! She still haunts my nightmares!” Kaminari shudders, placing the cup of his tea to his lip and taking a long, slow drink. His eyes shift over to the TV, which is still broadcasting the story of your attack. “What a bunch of bastards,” he growls, eyebrows scrunching as the news reporter ends the segment. “Thinking they can go after such a beautiful and talented idol… I’ll kill them.”
Kirishima was more than well aware of Kaminari’s plentiful budding romances. The blond man fell in love with just about any smiling woman who happened to waltz in front of him. Still, unlike most times, he found himself agreeing with him.
“It sounds really serious. I hope that she really considers some type of security team,” Kirishima inputs too, taking the teacup in his fingers with a nod of thanks. “There’re too many weirdos in Japan and in the world, I wouldn’t want to hear the news the day something bad happens.”
Kaminari hums, his face nearing Kirishima’s as he takes a small sip of the apparently black tea. His eyes scrunch, and Kirishima smiles awkwardly as the blond studies him intently.
“W-Wha—”
“You like Y/n!” Kaminari exclaims (accuses, maybe?), his arm leaving Kirishima’s shoulders as he points a finger accusingly at him. “I thought I was the only one in this department who did!”
“Don’t be an idiot, Denki,” the familiar voice of Sero responds for Kirishima. “Everyone in the world is in love with Y/n; she was voted the favorite artist of the year in our company. Everyone but Bakugou voted for her if I remember correctly.”
Kirishima looks over at his black-haired friend who is rummaging through his locker, his mouth curved into an easy, teasing smile as he looks between the bashful Kaminari and sneering Bakugou, who also seemed to just walk in.
“Her shit is basic and overrated,” Bakugou defended himself. “Nothing special and bad for your brain and ears.”
“Your go-to music playlist is fifty percent death metal and alt. rock. I don’t think you have ground to say that it’s bad for your brain and ears,” Midoriya’s snicker sounded from behind Kirishima, and he looked around to see the freckled man grinning at the snarling ash blond.
“And how does your stalker ass know that, shitnerd?!”
“‘Cause I’m a stalker, duh.”
“Oh, Bakugou-kun, Midoriya-kun! You’re both here! Todoroki-kun is looking for you!”
“I’m just saying that Y/n’s dates to all the award shows and premieres have been blond. She’s into blonds, so she would totally be into me!”
“Deku, if you don’t shut up, I’m going to kill you myself.”
“You wouldn’t even be able to protect Y/n, bro. The only thing you performed well on in the application process was the tasing part. You can’t even tase people repetitively! She’d be dead in a second.”
“Can you believe my client dropped me because I couldn’t cook a five-star meal correctly? Hello, I can make 7-11 into a five-star course; it’s not my fault they’re not refined.”
“Kirishima-kun, are you okay?”
“I deadass got into a dance competition on the way to work. That’s why I’m late, why would I lie? Of course, I had to compete; my reputation was on the line!”
“Kirishima-kun?”
“Yo, he’s not looking too hot?”
“Kirishima?!”
“Can you hear us?!”
Silence.
Kirishima found himself opening his eyes — when had he closed them? For a moment, the air turned coppery, his body feeling weak, and he thought he felt something heavy on his lap. But that wasn’t right; he was standing up, he wasn’t sitting down. Most importantly, he was in Tokyo, Japan. He was alright. He was safe.
The sweat that clung to the back of his neck was cold, clammy, and intrusive. His chest felt tight again, his hands shaking so harshly the tea's warm, dark liquid was sloshing onto the floor.
There were seven pairs of eyes on him, each a different color, each swimming with concern and other emotions. Kirishima knew his ears weren’t working right now, his face unable to meet his brain's screaming demands to smile, and he watched as their mouths moved as they questioned his sanity.
He was okay.
He was okay.
He was okay.
“Kirishima?”
Kirishima looked up, his neck craning to the side to see a tall, skinny man standing at the doorway. 
Toshinori Yagi was an esteemed bodyguard, one of the best in the industry, which was saying something considering that most bodyguards went unknown and unnamed. According to Google, Toshinori gained the nickname All Might after saving multiple political and celebrity lives when the government could not. It was long after his prime, and the man had retired but has since filled as the company’s head — thus why this job was near impossible to get.
Kirishima heaved a breath, realizing that he hadn’t taken a single breath when Toshinori’s bruised eyes narrowed in his concern.
“C-Coming,” Kirishima smiled, the blood rushing to his ears mostly ignorable now, but the scorching concerned gazes of his friends feel like cinders on his shoulder.
He straightens his tie, fingers curling when he feels the cold sweat penetrating through his clothes, but Kirishima doesn’t let it show. Smiling like he does, Kirishima pushed through his friends and followed Toshinori out the door.
They walked down towards the conference rooms, rooms that held their contractors, in complete silence.
“This is an important case,” Toshinori began, his voice gentle and poorly hiding his concern. “I chose you because you are a great asset to have, Kirishima. You are strong and smart, and most importantly, are personable.”
Kirishima looked at the man, his face contorting with his anxiety. He didn’t want to be treated like glass.
“Honestly, you being so personable is why I chose you for this assignment. Todoroki-shounen was a contender at first, but he’s not much of a talker; the same goes for Bakugou-shounen. Midoriya-shounen was probably the best choice, but there’s a new assignment that asked for three, so I gave up those three,” Toshinori explained the current assignments. It both delighted Kirishima to hear that he could keep up with arguably the three most qualified workers here as it did, at times, make him feel lesser. 
“Oh.”
But he was obviously not the first choice still.
“The only reason why you weren’t the first choice is because of what I walked into just now,” Toshinori interrupts Kirishima’s thoughts and words. Kirishima finds his eyes tearing away from the smooth, polished wood floor to see Toshinori stopping in front of Conference Room A, his gaze intense on him. “To be frank, I wasn’t too sure if we should have hired you all that time ago. You are excellent on the field, your skills are phenomenal. Something to be proud of, truly, but you are clearly not completely healed from your time on the force.”
“Toshinori—”
“Kirishima-shonen, I’m not saying that there’s shame in your current struggles,” Toshinori once again interrupts, his hand a soothing warmth on Kirishima’s shoulder. “I’m still not healed from my past injuries, and as many people have undoubtedly told you, it’s okay to not be okay. But you barely passed the psych evaluation and only passed your field training because you scored so phenomenally on the other things your lack of a shooting score passed you.”
Kirishima felt unable to look away from the piercing blue eyes, and the lump in his throat never tasted as bitter, as sad.
He had barely passed the admittance test.
“I just need to know, are you ready to take on this assignment?” Toshinori asks in complete seriousness. “It’s a high stake, big-name client. We do not expect anything untoward to happen, but we never know in these cases. I think highly of you, Kirishima-shonen, and if you are ready to take this on, I’ll believe you, but likewise, if you’re not, I will gladly give this to someone else.”
Kirishima swallowed, his dry tongue passing through his equally dry lips.
Without question, he was not okay, not when he nearly broke down twice in a matter of hours, but it was just a bad day. He wasn’t as shaken as he was two months ago; he was going to his mandated therapy, talking to people who could assist him. Kirishima just didn’t want to be treated like glass anymore; he wasn’t glass; he was an unbreakable force.
Steeling over his nerves and ignoring how his stomach twisted and turned, Kirishima raised his gaze to Toshinori.
“I can do it.”
A smile.
“Good.”
If Kirishima was sweating because he was on a mental slip earlier, he was now sweating because he was beyond petrified and embarrassed. His hands raised up to brush against his red spikey hair, praying to God that it didn’t look dumb. His legs bounced at a speed that was bordering insanity, but he could only hear the sound of his racing heart as he stared at your frowning form from across the table.
It was you — the Y/n, the world's biggest music idol, an absolute legend in the making.
“This is our very own Kirishima Eijirou, age twenty-eight. He has been with U.A.Services for approximately six months now and is without a doubt one of our most capable and well-serviced men,” Toshinori began the introduction to the three people on the other side of the table. Kirishima could feel a blush rising up his neck and settling into his cheeks as what he presumed to be you, your manager, and your lawyer shuffling through paperwork that was very thorough on his background. “He was enlisted in the military before joining our ranks and was honorably discharged at the age of twenty-six as First Sergeant Kirishima Eijirou due to extreme injury. He excels in negotiating, scouting, and is, as you know, a skilled close combatant and was skilled in handguns—”
“I don’t think he’ll need firearms,” you interrupt, a frown on your face in contrast to the bright smile Kirishima was so used to seeing on your face. He tensed in worry.
“Y/l/n!” your manager, Sato Kimiko, scolded.
“What? It’s true! We’ll be around my fans for the majority, if not all the time! How is that right? For him to have a firearm around defenseless, and may I add, harmless individuals?!” you argued, your eyebrows scrunching in your fury.
Kirishima felt frozen in his chair, his eyes seeking Toshinori for guidance, but found himself unable to look away from you. He knew nearly everything about you, he could admit with a proud grin that he was a super mega fan of you, and he might have, at one point, looked your height up to imagine how you would appear beside him. Kirishima had known this entire time that you were two feet shorter than him, but it hadn’t hit what that meant until he was shaking your hand when he first entered.
You were tiny.
His dick and mind really liked that, and seeing your own passion spilling out for your fans was making him fall deeper into this hole he had for you.
“You don’t have a say anymore? Do you understand? You were nearly assaulted yesterday, and we are all done waiting around for something serious to happen!” Kimiko yelled, her face contorted into a look of both frustration and fear. “Either you take this, or we all leave you. I won’t have you murdered in front of me! You’re twenty-six now, stop acting like a damn brat and grow the hell up!”
The words scorched the table, blistering heat filling the conference room as you met Kimiko’s glare.
Kirishima watched with a dropped jaw as your nostrils flared, your lips pursing, and your eyebrows furrowing with unspoken distaste and anger.
“Six months tops.”
“Uh, yes,” Toshinori interjected. “Our contracts only last up to six months for new clients, but if you find yourself wanting to extend your contract after those six months, we are very much open to negotiations.”
You nodded your head, your eyes falling back onto the booklet in your hands that exposed all the information available on Kirishima. From his likes, dislikes, to his allergies and the reason why he was discharged. Each in disturbingly deep detail to make sure all things were up on the table.
“So, you can’t shoot your gun, Kirishima-san?” you speak, your voice tight, a pleased, almost taunting tone.
Kirishima stills, embarrassment bubbling in his chest as you drop the booklet onto the table, exposing his military history to him and you. 
“...no,” Kirishima answers truthfully.
The lawyer shifts from the other side of you, his eyebrows scrunching as he too comes across that piece of information. 
“He won’t use firearms?” the lawyer scoffs, his semi-permanent frown deepening. “How will we know that he will keep Y/n completely safe from any sort of danger that may come her way? We’ll be paying six months for a glorified security guard? We want a bodyguard.”
“And we clearly have one,” you snap back, your eyes narrowing. “If my bodyguard isn’t Kirishima-san, I’m not getting one. I mean, isn’t that what you said earlier?”
“When we were assuming that the person Toshinori was assigning to your case was a well-rounded bodyguard. Not one that was still clearly haunted by his past.”
Fuck, that one hurt.
You scowled, your head tilting as you bared your teeth slightly, “And what? He managed to get into the best agency in all of Japan in spite of that. Sounds like he’s competent. I already told you I won’t take on a team, just one individual. I trust in Toshinori-san’s guidance and his choice in picking Kirishima-san. If you disagree, that’s too bad for you.”
“Y/n! Please stop this! You’re being ridiculous!” Kimiko huffed, slamming her own booklet down, her eyes drowning with her exhaustion. “I’m so sorry, Toshinori-san, Kirishima-san.”
“H-Hey, it’s okay!” Kirishima immediately imputed, his hands raising in a sign of retreat. “I know that Y/n has always enjoyed her independence as a solo star, and how me being involved now is imposing, especially after multiple attacks.”
Kirishima felt that his smile was a bit strained, a bit too forced, especially as your eyes hawked onto him. He felt like you were examining him, like a lab rat going through its initial trial and not knowing just what was to be expected.
“Six months?” you spoke, your gaze not leaving Kirishima’s own.
“Six months,” Kirishima agreed.
You hum, your head nodding. “Fine, six months tops unless the Lieutenant Colonel can apprehend these assholes faster.”
It had been ages since Kirishima had been called by his title, and for some reason, he found himself blushing. His mouth, for the first time this entire meeting, curled into a wolfish grin.
“You got it.”
The lawyer groaned, entirely aggravated and insulted. He stood up, “You’re asking to be murdered, Y/n. Don’t come haunting me when you end up dead and mutilated. You deserve all the shit you’re getting.”
Kirishima watched with his lips parted in a bewildered expression as the lawyer walked out of the room with a loud slam of the door.
You were unfazed, and Kimiko groaned, exhausted and embarrassed as she mumbled a weak, sullen, “I am so, so sorry, Toshinori-kun.”
“Ah, Kimiko-chan, it’s okay!” Toshinori shook his head and smiled knowingly. It wasn’t as if the long time famous bodyguard hadn’t seen his fair share of childish fights between clients. “Thank you for coming as always, and we’ll do our best to make sure that Y/n is in the best of hands.”
“Thank you… and so, the rest of the contract?”
“Ah, yes, let’s continue.”
So, the contract was discussed to full detail.
For six months, Kirishima would be attached to your side. He must always remain at most three meters away from you when there is no one around, and during fan interactions no more than one meter. He had a full say about your safety. If things got rough, you were to follow his every command. Your agency would pay for his room and lodging. He was to wear black pants and a black long-sleeved cotton tee. He would be working with every venue, every hotel, every conventions security team. He would lead them and never leave your side. He was to be awake an hour before you, rest when you were asleep so long as it was safe to do so. He was your guardian angel of sorts, and you would do nothing but adhere to him. 
Most importantly, according to Kimiko, there was one thing they were hoping for: Kirishima's help and discretion. For the next six months, they would be relying on Kirishima’s support to figure out who the group behind the assault was and who the mastermind was behind it all is.
Or so the contract said.
“Y/n!” Kirishima called when the papers were signed, and the day he was set to start was printed. He will begin tomorrow. “Wait!”
You stopped at the door, Kimiko and Toshinori chatting merrily between them as they exited the conference room, Toshinori’s booming voice asking if it was true that Kimiko was attending to a near forty clients to which she bashfully admitted to. You were dressed in a creme knit long-sleeved shirt, faded ripped jeans, and a pair of nude heels. The heels were big, undoubtedly giving you inches, but you still barely got to his shoulder.
“I-I’m looking forward to looking — I mean working with you!”
You looked at him closely, your eyes dragging to the top of his toes to the tallest spike in his hair before your lips pulled into a contemplative pout. You looked back to his eyes, and you steeled over, your head tilting to the side.
“I mean no offense, Sergeant, I thank you for doing your job, but I have no intention of looking forward to working with you. I don’t want you here, so do your best to ignore the contract and realize that I am the most important person, so you will follow my demands.”
Kirishima can do nothing but stare as you turn on your heel and leave.
Well, so much for a good case.
Date: 5/2 Time: 14:00 Location: Tokyo Music Stadium
If you would have told Kirishima Eijirou that he had been working for the grand, the perfect, the fantastic music idol Y/n for a month now, two months ago, he would have laughed so hard he’d cry. Not only would he have not believed it, but he would only think of a million and two scenarios where he would go the entire day flirting.
Now a month into knowing you, of being your bodyguard on a contract for six months, Kirishima could say that of that entire thought, the only thing he had been right about was that he was, in fact, crying. Not only has he never managed to speak an entire conversation with you despite being attached to your hip seven days a week, but despite your much shorter stature, you had managed to get away from him.
You always managed to sneak away from him.
Kirishima could admit that the no more than five meters rule had been wholly and utterly demolished.
And now, Kirishima was crying, not out of joy, but of pure manly fear as he raced through the backstages of the stadium, desperate to find your short-ass anywhere.
“Go, Kirishima!” someone yelled as Kirishima whizzed past him, “Find Y/n!”
“T-Thank you!” Kirishima screamed as he continued onward, the yellow-lit concrete hallway seemingly haunting the further he went into it. The earpiece in his left ear shrilled, the telling sign he was getting a call. Putting a finger to the circle in his ear, he answered the car. “Hello?!”
“Ah, Kirishima-san!” Kimiko’s voice chirped on the other side of the line. “Wonderful to hear your voice again! I’m calling to let you know that the tour bus is parked outside of the venue now. The concert was a smashing success, and she’s come out unharmed for the past month! To make matters even better, since your arrival, there have been no more assault attempts! Oh, um, sorry, where are you guys?”
“We’re just, um!” Kirishima tried not to pant into the microphone; he was still racing ahead, his head peeking into every door and room he passed. “Y/n needed to use the restroom?!”
“Oh, wonderful. Okay! Let me know when you two are on your way over!”
“Ya, okay, bye!”
“By—”
Kirishima hung up as he crashed through the doors at the end of the hallway.
It was night out right now, the full moon reflecting down on the dirty concrete with the same intensity as the streetlamps overhead. And in the middle of a crowd of around twenty people was the person Kirishima was trying to find: you.
You were still dressed in the final costume change of your concert. Even from a distance, Kirishima could see the glitter and highlight on the tip of your nose and the curve of your cheekbones. The crowd around you was clearly not hostile. Each face was bright with broad smiles and sparkling with fresh tears, each voice high and pitchy as if they were talking with some goddess and not you. 
There was a slight longing in Kirishima’s chest at the sight of you interacting with your fans, your smile was so beautiful, and he wished just for a moment that he was the one that it was directed towards. If he had met you as a fan, and only a fan, he wonders if you would look at him as you did the others. Would he see the pure joy in the depths in your eyes, the love, wonder, and pride as they asked you questions and answered your own?
He wanted to be just a fan.
“Y/n, the tour bus is here,” Kirishima finally found his voice, the tenor of his voice spreading through the narrow alleyway. “Say your goodbyes.”
He had to ignore the way you stiffened immediately, the unsolicited joy in your face breaking and becoming bleak as you met his gaze. Kirishima absolutely did not feel pressure behind his eyes when you rolled your eyes and began to say your goodbyes; he did not!
The group of fans waved goodbye as you walked backward toward Kirishima; you didn’t stop waving and continuing your parting conversations with the group until the metal doors of the stadium doors closed behind the two of you. Kirishima let out a sigh, his eyes closing for a brief moment before looking down at you. You were expressionless, eyes cold as you looked dead ahead.
“You’re not supposed to run away like that.”
“I thought we agreed you wouldn’t tell me what to do, Sergeant.”
“You know I can’t do that it’s not—”
“Part of your contract. Yeah, I know, but that’s your contract, not mine.”
“Oh, okay. Um, Kimiko? ...yeah, we’re heading out now. Five minutes, till.”
And then there’s only silence.
Neither Kirishima nor you bother talking the entire walk towards the tour bus, and you ignore Kimiko’s call that your lawyer would be meeting briefly before tomorrow's fan signing event. You walk into the bus and go directly to the beds, throwing yourself into the terribly padded bunk and passing out without so much as a sound.
Kirishima sinks into his own bed, it’s too small for him, but there’s nothing he can do about it. Sleep overcomes him easily these days; he’s always way too exhausted in chasing you down like some spoiled toddler you’re behaving like to dream. But that’s okay, he thinks as the comfort of sleep begins to dig its skeleton fingers into his side, at least the exhaustion stops the night terrors.
Date: 5/3 Time: 10:00 Location: Tokyo Music Tower
Now, Kirishima knew that it was a common belief and a nearly proven theory that when you met your idols, you should never ever have your expectations high on who they are as a person. Celebrities were out of touch, cruel, rude, nearly jaded. They weren’t exactly the common folk. With people willing to forget things like them being human beings themselves or the common thread of celebrities being too rich to care, any type of famous person was cold, rude, and ruthless.
He knew that.
He also knew that you weren’t like the nearly proven theory.
You were kind, sweet, a practical angel to anyone who dared to approach you. You were the exception to the rule, an outlier to them all. You spoke politely to all your fans, domestic and foreign, and you treated each fan like the most special person in the world.
You were a good person.
But Kirishima knew, just as you reacted to any cruel person you encountered, you had an edge. Your words were as vicious as your name was known. He genuinely enjoyed watching you put assholes into place, but he sulked, knowing he was always at the receiving end of the sharp, bitter tongue of yours.
For a month and a day now, he had been the number target of your bitter words and scorching hate, but he admitted that he enjoyed it when it wasn’t directed at him, if but a little bit.
“I’m not renegotiating my contract!” you groan, your palms slamming into the depths of your eyes. “I already told you that I don’t need all that money!”
“And I’m telling you that you need to increase the wages that you pay the rest of your team instead of all those charities or else people will begin dropping you!” the lawyer countered with similar fire, his scowl angry enough that Kirishima felt like he had to tear his gaze away from this horrible battle. “You won’t be the best of the best forever, y/n, get over your stupid savior act and look over the changes!”
Kirishima looked over at you, his eyebrows pinching as he watched you fold your arms, your cheeks pushed out to a puff as you looked at the stack of papers with the title page fully covered with the word Contract of Y/n and Co. on it. Well, it seemed that the rumor of you spending your paycheck on things that weren’t you was right, how entirely manly.
“Oh fuck off,” you growl, pushing out of the chair and storming away.
Kirishima glanced over at Kimiko, who was looking pale and exhausted, undoubtedly exhausted from the past thirty-minute battle between the lawyer and the idol that neither made a single step forward nor a step back. How you had the energy to fight so passionately was beyond him. Kimiko nodded minimally, her lips parting in a sigh as Kirishima stood up and followed after her.
“The only way that brat is going to listen is by force,” the lawyer sneered, his voice fading into the room that Kirishima exited. “If that’s how she wants to play, so be it.”
Fortunately for Kirishima, he catches up to you. There are tears of fury dripping down your cheeks, and he feels unable to speak as he discovers a new layer to you.
...how interesting.
“It’s my money,” you speak, but Kirishima is unsure if those words are meant for him or for the void, the earth that you would much rather converse with than him. “I already pay them all a much greater paycheck than they should be getting considering their client pool. Why do I have to bend to their stupid will when I’m the one making the money.”
Kirishima blinks, wondering just what people might want to raise with their contracts. But, he knew you were right. By her account, Kimiko had a client list of many successful individuals, and he may not know anything about the lawyer, but if he worked with Y/n, his name must be good. Guess they weren’t like you.
“People are selfish assholes,” was the only thing that Kirishima could think of, and was something he spoke before he could stop himself.
But you stop in your storm, the anger that clouded you somewhat dissipating, clearing just enough for you to turn to him, your sharp, beautiful eyes for the first time filled with rage that was not pointed at him, and an emotion that made him think of… amusement?
“Yeah,” you agree, a half-smile cracking onto your face, and Kirishima feels his soul begin leaving his very body. “People are selfish assholes, huh?”
“Very much.”
There’s a calm, a snorted chuckle, and Kirishima finds himself stumbling further into the abyss of his feelings for you.
The next ten hours seem to pass in a blur, Kirishima feeling like he was on Cloud Nine as he stood behind you, three meters as he watched fan after fan approach you. Signatures were made, pictures were taken, and Kirishima found that he never once had to approach.
Maybe, he thinks, just perhaps, the two of you can overcome this.
Ten minutes after the official signing is done, Kirishima can’t find you, and he curses loudly into the echoing floor.
So much for change.
Date: 5/17 Time: 23:00 Location: The Parking Lot - Mt. Lady Studios
Kirishima was, for the lack of better words, completely fucking done with you.
Don’t get it wrong, he still was a complete and massive fan of yours. He would never once betray his loyalty to you and your musical career, but he was slowly starting to realize just why the lawyer was set to dying of a heart attack any time soon. Despite your early entrance to stardom and the stuff of legends, you had kept your fiery, stubborn individualism.
Kirishima thought it was absolutely hot and sexy at times, especially the times where you strut around in revealing clothes because ‘this is your body,’ or the lingerie campaign you completed two days ago as part of some fundraising event. There were significant perks to your strong handle and claim to keeping your indestructible personality, but it came back to rub them all back in the worst of ways when once again, you escaped from Kirishima’s side.
To be fair, most of the time, Kirishima was a very level headed individual; he was near impossible to rile up despite popular initial belief. I mean, he was good friends with Bakugou Katsuki, who riled up just about anyone he talked to! He needed to have steel calm emotions, or at the very least portray that he does. But even the unbreakable after tireless attempts can, at times, be broken.
It had been a hard morning.
Kirishima had woken up in a panic, the sweat of his night terror soaking through the sheets of his bed, and his head felt like lead. They had been in the tour bus for the entire day because you were going from the tip of Japan to the bottom of it, thus meaning that you couldn’t run away from him, concluding that when he went to bed that night, he was merely tired, not exhausted.
“K...Kiri...shima?” the voice whispered in his ears when he bolted from his bed and tumbled to the ground, his chest heaving in his panic as he cried.
He only slept for four hours that night, the ghost of his comrade haunting him too much for him to ever drift back to sleep. The only thing he was grateful for when he stumbled down to the hotel lobby for breakfast was that he had an attack while in his own room and not in a tour bus with ten others.
But the lack of sleep and the twisting of his guts from his still unburied memories meant that his exhaustion was dialed up larger than he thought was capable. Today was an interview day plus a miniconcert at said interview.
That meant that for an hour before your interview and two hours afterward, Kirishima lost you and had to hunt you down. You weren’t making it easy on him and had started moving with the crowd you gathered to evade him.
But today, Kirishima was exhausted.
Today, Kirishima wanted to sleep.
Today… Kirishima broke.
“Let’s go,” Kirishima spoke in a low, commanding voice. His eyes were hooded as he looked down at you, the crowd of fans parting like the red sea as he stands behind you, larger than life, imposing.
You ignore him.
“We’re leaving, now.”
“Aw, did you make that just for me?! This beading is gorgeous!”
To be fair, Kirishima isn’t really sure if he’s crying right now or if steam is protruding from his ears like some stupid cartoon. The only thing he knows is that it's been a bit longer than a month, and his client is the most perfect person in the world except to him and some lawyer. All he knows is that he has been continuously mocked, shamed, and disrespected by his client, and at this moment, with his mind and body aching with the memories of the morning, he can no longer stop the tsunami of emotions and thoughts that shove out of him.
He grabs your wrist and begins pulling you away.
“We’re leaving now, sorry to disrupt your time. Come see Y/n another day.”
Kirishima isn’t even aware of your screams, the banging of your small fist against his back as his hand encompasses your bicep easily. He walks and walks and walks until he stops, his mind slightly put back into place.
“—FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?! LET GO OF ME, SERGEANT!”
Oh, right.
He lets go of you immediately and nearly snorts at how you stumble into his back. So small, so delicate, and so completely weak.
“You want to know my problem, y/l/n?” he asks, voice eerily calm, much calmer than he actually is. “My fucking problem is that I signed onto this case with a single rule: keep you in sight and protect you. It’s simple, almost too easy, isn’t it? But easy and simple is everything that this assignment is!”
Your face contorted into a flash of anger and embarrassment, your nose scrunching as you found your footing, “And I told you that I don’t give a crap about that contract! I didn’t want it in the first place, but no one listens to me!”
Kirishima snorts, his body shifting so that he can look at you properly; your face is seething, your teeth bared and eyes wild, but Kirishima has faced worse.
“It’s not in my contract to listen to you, unfortunately,” Kirishima points out, his eyes narrowing. “I would have a better time listening to you, trying to find an agreement that worked if you used that brain of yours and figured out a way to compromise with me.”
“Compromises aren’t—”
“You think I wouldn’t?” Kirishima almost whines, his voice tight with emotions, fingers fisting in his hair, “You really fucking think that after a month and how many days of me spending stupid hours trying to find your ass, most of the time never knowing if you’re dead or not, I wouldn’t want a better solution?!”
“Like hell they’ll kill me! And if they do, I don’t fucking care!” you stubbornly insist, finger buried against the swell of your chest.
“Oh my god,” Kirishima can’t stop the bitter laugh from escaping, “you’re ridiculous.”
“I’m ridiculous?! I’m not the ridiculous one here!” you cry, your eyes bursting with unshed, bitter tears. “So what that I run away from you? Can you imagine living the past ten years of your life trying to be something that the media wants you to be? No! You can’t, Sergeant! Those times where I’m running away isn’t to be some dick, but to give me time to be me!”
“You’re a goddamn idiot!” Kirishima barks, his anger curdling in his chest like a raging fire. “If you had looked at my damn file correctly, instead of focusing on the stupid shit like me not being able to fire my gun correctly, you would be more than aware of the fact that you are one of my favorite artists!”
“Wh-”
“I am one of the best in my company! I am easy to get along with, personal, manageable, flexible even, but from the very first moment you laid eyes on me, you’ve hated me! You talk down on me, you shit on me, my job, the reason I’m here! Listen, I would fucking love to be anywhere but here right now. I have literally never hated my job before, but you just made that a reality. But the worst part of this all is the fact that you seem to think I would have kept you away, prohibited you from doing things that I already know you love! You stand there and tell me that I would try to force you to do shit you don’t want when I have merely been asking for you to take me there with you! I don’t care if I have to stand away and watch, but I want to be there! I’m supposed to be protecting you, but you’re being nothing more than a stubborn brat who refuses to see the efforts I’m trying to make, and frankly, I’m done.”
Kirishima’s chest is burning with the lack of oxygen, his eyes narrowed and filled with raging fire as he stares down at you, his neck craned so that he could be closer, more daunting, intimidating.
“Fuck o-off,” you snap suddenly, a lone tear, your voice tight and shoulders tense as you storm off.
“So predictable,” Kirishima calls after you, but it’s not filled with the previous anger he had but the sinking misery and regret.
And for a moment, it’s quiet.
Until a single name is screamed.
“SERGEANT!”
And then the all too familiar sound of a fist colliding with skin.
The anger in Kirishima’s blood evaporates immediately, and horror sinks in as he turns towards where you had stormed off. Oh no, oh no, oh no.
The parking lot is filled with an ugly yellow light that seems to set the stage for what was to come down. His footsteps crashing down against the black pavement were mute in his ears, and his eyes were focused on your limp body slung over somebody's shoulder. There was one person behind him, the other one already hopping into a van; Kirishima was the devil on their heels.
“Come on! Let’s go!” the one in the van screamed, his voice full of gruff apprehension and fear.
The van turns on.
Kirishima grunts, adrenaline pumping through his veins as he sidesteps the man who was lingering behind the one carrying you and quickly slams his shoulder into the man's sternum, knocking him out the moment he collapses onto the ground. 
He lets out a roar of such, his eyes glowing with anger and a single mind track to take down the person who held you, ready to throw your unconscious body into the back of the van.
Kirishima doesn’t even know when he manages to get to the man's side, one hand on his shoulder, the other on you, and with the strength and anger of a million fighting warriors, he ripped you from his hold and sent him stumbling into the trunk. Your shallow breathing brushes against his neck, and Kirishima is hyper-aware of the cursing men who chose to abandon their unconscious comrade on the floor. 
With his arms filled by your unconscious body, Kirishima can only watch the van scurry out of the lot, the license plate immediately burning into his mind.
T082-23
When the man on the floor finally wakes up, he’s in police custody, and you’re just waking up. There's a bruise on your cheek, and you begin crying immediately.
Kirishima watches from the distance, his heart aching and guilt climbing up his throat as he watches Kimiko hold you close, her arms warm and tight.
Well, shit.
So much for the month of no attacks.
Kirishima sits in a waiting room, his head relaxed against the wall as he waits for your discharge from the hospital. They suspect a concussion, and they’re running some tests right now. The police are there too, trying to get information from you on the failed kidnapping attempt as well as beginning the initial trials of interrogation of the abandoned kidnapper with a broken sternum, ruptured spleen, and three cracked ribs.
He was not surprised when the police officers came to talk to him, and he gave them the license plate.
But they also gave him an essential piece of information.
(“Well, when we asked for a motive, it seemed that it wasn’t his idea,” the detective admitted, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. “His boss said that, and I quote, Y/n will end up dead and mutilated as is deserved. She deserves all the shit she has coming her way, end quote. Any ideas of who it could be”
Kirishima rubbed a hand across his face, the words striking a bit too familiarly to him, but from where. He shook his head, his eyes focusing on his bouncing knee.
“Thank you,” Kirishima said, his tone pointed in a clear indicator that this conversation was now over. The detective nodded, his frown slight as he left. The moment he was gone, Kirishima pulled out his phone and dialed a number. “Kimiko? Yeah, I think we might have our first suspect.”)
For now, he was waiting for you.
An hour passed before you shuffled into the waiting room. There was a bandage on your swollen cheek, but besides the obvious attack, your eyes looked strong, and it seemed like there was no concussion.
“I should be fine,” you speak first, your jaw tensing as if it physically pained you to speak (whether it was because you hated talking to him or because of the injury, Kirishima had no idea). “I will be fine; I just need some sleep.”
Kirishima nodded, his body completely exhausted, and his mind filled with nothing but regrets on how he handled his anger earlier. He needed to apologize. He wasn’t entirely wrong, but he had definitely crossed a few too many lines.
“Should we go?”
You chewed on your lip, your eyes looking down at the white tiled floors of the hospital — so bleak, so anxiety driving.
“I actually wanted to talk before we left.”
Oh?
“Of what, if I may ask?”
Your eyes raise back up before looking away again, “the contract.”
Kirishima finds himself nodding, his hand gesturing towards the empty seat in front of him.
“Sure.”
And with a heaving sigh that sounds like you were on the verge of tears, you sit before him.
The contract was then discussed.
It was decided that you could continue to interact with fans as you wish, so long as you took Kirishima with you. He didn’t care about the long hours, the manic fans, or the impending doom of a group of people who meant business. He needed to be there.
Everything else stayed the same, but Kirishima looked at you one last time that night in the hospital, his body leaning towards you as he did his best to keep his face void of emotion and any lingering teasing.
“I’ll only accept this new negotiation on one term.”
“W-What?!” you pause, thinking. “Fine, say it.”
“From here on out, I think we should be friends, yeah? I’m on your side, after all, it’s a bit weird if we stay just acquaintances.”
The tension and horror leave your body, and Kirishima, for the first time ever, bears witness to the most relaxed, meaningful smile he has ever seen you give. It had been one hell of a shitty night, but at that very moment when the seventh turned into the eighth, Kirishima felt a new warmth flood through his chest, his heart racing at the sight of your glorious smile.
“Of course, Kirishima.”
“Oh, and y/n?” 
“Yes?”
“I’m sorry about all that I said. It was unmanly of me and out of line.”
“It’s okay. To be fair, I was a bit of a self-absorbed brat, too.”
The next day, a picture of Kirishima holding you bridal style is trending.
Date: 6/12 Time: 19:00 Location: Hime Onsen
An Interview with Y/n | Vogue Japan 4.5 million views • Premiered 2 hours ago 874k [liked this] 12.3k [disliked this] Timestamp: 05:32 / 10:33
[Interviewer]: Now, Y/n, we must congratulate you on your latest achievement! Your latest self-titled album, ‘Y/N,’ has been nominated for a record high of twelve awards for the upcoming Japan Record Awards, which will be coming up in about a month! Tell us how you feel about this?
[You]: It was quite a surprise actually! I didn’t realize that it would have done so well in the critic's eyes to get this type of award. I am proud of myself and am excited to see all the other amazing artists and musicians who were nominated as well.
[Interviewer]: Now, your album is all about staying true to yourself, whether that be in love or war. It depicts your own highs and lows while also highlighting beautifully universal things many of us face. Without question, you have always been adamant on staying connected with your fans and keeping a simple rule: no bodyguards.
[Y/n]: Oh, (laughs) yes! That is definitely a new thing, huh?
[Interviewer]: A new thing and a beautiful thing at that, too! Look here!
[captioner notes: interviewer displays many photos of Y/n’s bodyguard, including the most famous one where he’s holding y/n after the failed kidnapped attempt]
[Interviewer]: This is a beautiful — don’t giggle! — a beautiful man, Y/n! What do you have to say for yourself?! Did you finally succumb to keeping untrue to yourself for this beautiful man?! If so, it is perfectly acceptable. By chance, is your contract with him done? I would personally love to have this man on my team.
[Y/n]: (laughing) By all means, take him! (Y/n looks behind her, her bodyguard is there) I’m kidding, I’m kidding! (pauses) No, actually, sorry. Kirishima is an outstanding bodyguard, and I have no intentions of leaving him so soon. Uh, while I did say I had no wish or intentions to have a bodyguard, obviously that was not the best solution, so I hired Kirishima. He is a wonderful addition to my team and still allows me to be authentically me, so it’s still all good.
[Interviewer]: Ah, okay, well, Kirishima-kun, if you ever need a new client, call me. But moving on, yes! Would you like to discuss the series of increasingly concerning attacks?
Kirishima stood in the softly lit hallways of a sauna.
Today was one of the last remaining days you had off, and in celebration of your upcoming award season, you had decided that it was mandatory to visit the hot springs. Everyone on your team — the backup dancers, band, and hair and makeup — were ecstatic to learn that they were being involved with it too.
This high-end resort had accommodated your entire team to receive their own private spring with an all-inclusive menu too. 
It was thanks from the owner for the free PR and, of course, because they were some of your biggest fans. So, in thanks, everyone got to enjoy the springs.
Well, everyone but Kirishima, that was.
As of the past month, things between Kirishima and you had improved a lot.
With Kirishima no longer needing to run a marathon daily to find where you were, he would find himself walking at your side. He no longer felt like you hated him. There was respect and actual friendship between the two of you. You joked with him, showed him memes and TikTok, sent him snapchat streaks, and invited him to watch weird shows with you. You even complained to him about the things that annoyed you, namely Kimiko’s attention being stolen by other clients and the rude conversations you would have with the lawyer.
It made Kirishima’s chest warm up knowing that you were friends now.
A stressful month had passed into a friendlier one.
But there were some things that Kirishima would not have expected to… arise.
Namely you growing to be comfortable enough to walk around with nothing but a thin pair of panties and a large shirt. You curling into his side whenever you watched a show together in the bus, the way your lips brushed against his neck when he leaned down to hug you, or the very so not obvious teasing you would do when you changed in front of him. It was as if you were watching his every reaction, enjoying the way that his eyes horribly tore away, or the silent hitch in his throat whenever you speed his heart up.
The biggest surprise arose the night after the failed kidnapping attempt:
You had come to his room, hours after you were supposed to have fallen asleep.
Your eyes were sunken, still a bit tired, and the bruise on your cheek was looking bad. In your arms was a white binder undoubtedly filled with the introductory packet you had received at your initial meeting. Kirishima had opened the door in his sleepy state in nothing but gym shorts. He had barely started dozing off, his mind wouldn’t stop thinking of what could have happened if you hadn’t managed to scream, and so he kept tossing and turning.
Seeing you outside of his room, his head dropped down to look at you properly, and his fist rubbing at his eye fell, “Y/n?”
“Did I wake you?” you asked, your face filled with a shocked, near uncomfortable, and embarrassed expression he doesn’t recall ever seeing on you. “I’m so sorry! I’ll wait until—”
“No,” Kirishima grunts while he shakes his head, his voice raspy and dry from his lack of use. “I’ve been tossing and turning, um, what is it? Do you want to come in?”
“I-If that’s okay?”
Kirishima breathes out a bit, his shoulders relaxing as he smiles softly, “Come on, let’s talk about what’s on your mind.”
The door clicked behind your tentative steps with an echo, and Kirishima watched as you walked into the hotel room with wariness and caution.
“Would you like some tea?” Kirishima offered, picking up a shirt from his dresser and pulling it over his body. The fabric was tight against his chest and shoulders, but felt more appropriate to wear around you.
“No, I’m okay,” you politely decline.
You stood in the center of the room, unsure of where to sit, stand, or lay.
“Go ahead and make the bed,” Kirishima offered, taking the chair by the desk. “I promise it’s still clean.”
You laugh slightly, smile strained but grateful as you sit at the edge of the bed, binder resting on your lap.
“Thanks, I wouldn’t want to sit on a dirty bed,” you joke, but it sounds weak to Kirishima’s ears.
“So, what questions do you have?”
“Hm?”
“You have my portfolio,” he shrugs, leaning forward so that his forearms rest on his knees. “I have a feeling you have some questions.”
“Oh, right,” you whisper, your eyebrows scrunching as you open the binder to the first page, but your eyes are focused on the desk. “What’s the medication for?”
Kirishima turns his head to follow your gaze and comes across the yellow tinted medicine containers.
“My PTSD,” Kirishima answers honestly, his voice soft with emotion, but there was no shame in it. “My service had a difficult end.”
“That’s actually… that’s what I came to talk about,” you rush, your hands slamming the binder closed. “If you don’t want to talk about it, obviously I won’t push it! God, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have—”
“No, it’s okay,” Kirishima interrupted, his smile sad, but he stood up, his body a tower in front of yours as he urged you to sit back down. “It’s okay; I don’t mind talking about it.”
“B-But what if I say something that makes it all worse?”
A pause.
“Then I’ll tell you that it’s too much.”
A nod.
“Are you… are you still experiencing a lot of symptoms?” you ask, your fingers tightening and untightening around the binder.
“Some days are worse than others,” Kirishima admits, his shoulders shrugging. “I don’t experience much anxiety while in crowds anymore; I don’t have many flashbacks to those days anymore, not since February at least. I do still get… I still get night terrors and dream of that day. It’s nowhere near as bad as the first few months after the accident, but it’s still here.”
“What happened?” you asked after a bit, morbidly curious.
The file had all the details that proved Kirishima to be a master of firearms during his entire time on the force. He was a powerful combatist, and his ranking was a clear indicator of the respect and skills he had. Still, it was the quick honorable discharge, the near year-long hospitalization, and the current inability to use a firearm that concerned you.
What had happened?
“I was involved in a grenade explosion on my last day on tour. I was the only one who managed to survive the blast,” Kirishima easily stated, his voice quiet.
“Oh my god, I… holy shit, I’m so sorry.”
“Nah, it’s all good. There were only two others around, and one of them was already dead.”
“Was that um, Major—”
“We called him Crimson Riot, actually,” Kirishima smiled, a chuckle light on his tongue as he leaned back onto the chair, nodding. “Yeah, that was him.”
“Crimson Riot,” you repeat, nodding. “Did you watch him… watch him die?”
Kirishima presses his lips tightly together, and for a moment, you’re unsure if he’s going to cry, answer you, or tell you to leave. There’s a whirlwind of emotions on your optimistic and typically jubilant bodyguard despite your asshole tendencies that make your stomach twist.
“Yes,” Kirishima finally answers, and you nod.
It’s hours into the morning before you finally depart back to your room, the horrors of Kirishima’s past still pounding into your ears. Kirishima wouldn’t notice, and neither would you, but on his shirt and yours, there’s a few drops of tears the both of you shed when you said goodnight.
Sergeant Kirishima Eijirou, while on an active warzone, had accidentally struck and killed his superior officer, his friend, his role model Crimson Riot, thinking that he was nothing more than an enemy target as he sat wounded behind a wall. He died on his lap, and as someone came to help, a grenade landed two meters away before detonating.
“K...Kiri...shima?” Crimson Riot had whispered as he fell to his knees, blood gushing and seeping through his clothes, spilling onto Kirishima’s lap. “I’ll be okay.”
For whatever reason, since that night, Kirishima felt something in him shift. He still took his medication, still had his virtual therapy sessions when he could fit them in, and even had painful night terrors of that moment, but it was becoming less frequent.
He wasn’t made of glass.
There had been more instances after the kidnapping attempt, but unlike the last times, Kirishima was prepared. He had stopped each one, keeping you safe and sound. As of one week ago, he had officially been given a firearm to keep strapped to his thigh at all times now.
It was an unfamiliar weight, one that still twisted his stomach and made him nervous, but he knew the reason why it was needed. Since the gun had been added to his gear, the attacks stopped. He was definitely not ready to be firing it anytime soon, but it had deterred the attackers for the time being.
Kirishima paused when he heard his earpiece ring, and he dropped his phone where he had been watching your interview despite being there himself.
“Talk to me,” Kirishima answered, his finger pressing the accept button.
“Kirishima!” came the distressed voice of Kimiko, “We just got a tip!”
Kirishima stilled, his eyes scanning the empty hallways that stretched throughout the private hot springs.
“I don’t know, but a person with connections with this mastermind said something about how there were two more events he was staging. Today is one of them!”
Kirishima’s eyes widened, his lips parting to answer Kimiko when instead there was a large, loud crash in the water from inside your room. He assumed the worst.
“Y/n!” Kirishima shouted, hands throwing open the sliding door and racing through the storage room, the shower, and exited out into the hot spring.
Steam curled through the wind, the white wisps of steam feeling warm and light against Kirishima’s skin, and Kirishima panicked when he couldn’t see your shadow or figure in the hot springs.
“Where is she?! Is she alright?!” Kimiko panicked, her voice panicking already. “I’ll call the—”
Kirishima turned on his heel, ready to complete a full sweep of the outdoor hot spring when he crashed into something smaller than he was… smaller, softer, and definitely the shape of a woman. Kirishima felt his entire body stiffen when his rough palms felt the undeniable feeling of wet, warm skin.
“Oh my god,” he heard you shriek. “KIRISHIMA!”
“She’s all good, Kimiko,” Kirishima stifled out, his voice tight, his head slamming backward so that his eyes were concentrated on the starry night sky.
“...sorry… uh aha! Another client of mine is calling, goodbye!” Kimiko’s apology was meek and small before she hung up.
Kirishima’s mind was racing a mile a minute, but his body was frozen, unmoving like a rock when he realized that pressing to his stomach was, without a doubt, your breasts.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
“What are you doing in here, pervert?!” you splutter, your hands pressing to his stomach as you step away. “Are you a pervert or something?!”
“I, no! No! Of course not! Fuck, shit, I’m so sorry! I’ll go! There was a tip that something was going to happen right now, and there was a crash and—”
“What are you looking at?” you exclaim, squeaky frustration heavy on your tongue. “There’s nothing wrong with the sky! Look me in the eyes? Have you never been to a co-ed hot spring before?!”
“Y-Yes, sorry!” Kirishima apologized, bowing slightly in apology before he peered down. Still, his face bursted in a flame as he watched the way your jaw dropped in disbelief, the dewy wetness of the hot spring clinging to your body. You were, obviously, soaked, and Kirishima bit his tongue as hard as he could to keep the whimper from expelling past his lips when he saw the light gleaming off your breasts. But he watched your face shift between a million emotions, each one appearing too fast for him to read, too fast to register, but he saw the way a single-arm wrap around your breast and the other shoving into his stomach.
“PERVERT!”
“What?!”
“That was a test! This is my private room! I have the right to not be willing to be looked at right now!” you shrieked as Kirishima spun around, allowing you the complete privacy of his gaze.
“You told me to look at you!” he squawked. “Y-You told me, and I listened because of our contract!”
Kirishima could feel his body trembling, his mind reeling in disbelief that he definitely saw you in your entire nakedness, and if the swirling heat in his stomach had anything to say about it, he liked it. Fuck.
There was a soft laugh and the sound of sloshing water as you probably (he wouldn’t know because he wasn’t looking) reentered the spring.
“I know, I was teasing,” you sing, and he can tell the water is gliding around your body. “Turn around, Kiri, let’s talk.”
“Haha, um, I’m not sure if that’s a good idea,” Kirishima admits, although sitting in this steam-filled space with just you sounds so very nice. 
“Why not?” you asked, voice sounding a bit upset.
“I’m supposed to be outside, doing my job?”
“Augh, but these private springs are so boring alone,” your voice whines; the water sloshes, and Kirishima winces at the slight throb on his tongue as he continues to look at not your direction. “Turn around, Kiri.”
Not too long ago, you had taken to calling him Kiri, a subtle change, a not unusual nickname people gave him. But just because it was you, his stomach flipped and twisted, and now with the image of your tits in mind, his dick throbbed. 
Gulping, Kirishima turned, his gaze bashfully looking down at you before glancing away. You were chest-deep in the hot springs, tendrils of your wet hair sticking to your neck. Was he dead? Maybe dreaming?
No, his dreams were never like this.
“Do you want to come in?” you continued to ask, your body moving towards him in the water until you reached the edge of the pool, arms testing into the black rocks. “You’re the only one not in one, and since I hate being in these alone, I figured you’d like to join.”
Kirishima wanted to join. More than anything, he wanted to take his clothes off and jump into the springs with you, for you, but that would be unprofessional. Entirely and utterly unprofessional.
“Please?” you ask softly, pleadingly, and Kirishima makes the mistake of locking his gaze with yours. 
“...fine, but I’ll be on the other side of the spring,” he concedes, his steps near clumsy and oafish as he stumbles backward to the shower and closet.
“Such a gentleman pervert,” you tease, fingers curling as you wave at him until Kirishima finally closes the door behind him.
The empty room is nearly deafening in its silence and the future as Kirishima slumps against the sliding door, excited apprehension rippling through every cell of his skin as a smile spreads across his face. He walks to the storage room, and despite it being a private room, there were two closets. The closet not already occupying your clothes had the things needed for him, and thankfully, it fit. 
He undressed slowly, folding his clothes and placing them into the cubbies. Fully naked, he approached the showers, and under the lukewarm showerhead, he cleaned his body of any grime, dirt, and sweat. 
Feeling refreshed and clean, Kirishima began his descent to the hot spring, his heart hammering when his fingers grabbed the handle of the door.
“I’m coming in,” he announced, a healthy amount of fear, excitement, and heat drumming through him.
“I’ll keep my virgin eyes away from your body, don’t worry,” came your slow tease, and Kirishima snorted softly.
Kirishima stepped back out to the hot spring.
Just like the first time, the entrance to the spring was warm, the steam seeming thicker than last time, clouding the outdoor room and his sight. You were at the furthest out part of the pool, your back towards them as you worked your fingers through your scalp.
Discarding his slippers at the edge, Kirishima climbed into the pool.
The pool only went as far as his thigh, and he sank into the warm water. It felt wonderful on his body, relaxing his muscles just enough for him to wonder when was the last time he had managed to visit a hot spring.
“I’m in,” Kirishima said, his arms rising up out of the water, resting onto the black stone. “You can turn around now.”
“God, took you long enough,” you tease, your body twisting so that you were facing him again.
To Kirishima’s complete and utter surprise, you stilled, eyes dragging up and down his exposed chest, eyes locked on the series of tattoos all over his right pectoral, and trailed down his right arm. His lips felt dry as your eyes shifted back to his face, to his arm, and back to him. The smile on your face felt weak, but it sent a spiral of dizzying heat through Kirishima when he noticed the hushed lust.
For a while, the two of you remained at opposite ends of the hot spring. Eyes closed, hummed melodies passing through the song. You asked Kirishima about how he felt, if his medication was due for refills, if therapy was okay (he was doing better, a refill was due in two weeks, and therapy was going the same). He asked you about your relationship with Kimiko, with the lawyer, and if you had any real friends within the music industry (Kimiko was like an older cousin to you, the lawyer was a pain to deal with at times, and surprisingly, you did meet some genuine friends). You questioned how his friends were doing, if he had any contact with them despite their busy schedules. 
So Kirishima found himself retelling stories of his coworkers turned close friends. Each story he told left both of you with sore stomachs from laughter, and tears at the corner of your eyes from laughing too hard. 
“Was the tip story true?” you asked once the quiet overcame and grew old. You shift through the water, getting a bit closer to Kirishima.
Kirishima coughed, suddenly feeling a tad bit shy about his posture, but decided to keep from moving.
“You honestly think I would have barged into here just because I wanted to see you?”
Truthfully, had Kirishima been a man without morals, chivalry, or disrespect for you, he would have. Definitely would have.
“Let a girl dream,” you smile, like a luring siren as you wander closer by just a step. “It would go against everything I know about you, but it’s fun to tease.”
“You’re a bigger brat than I thought you would be,” Kirishima smiles back, trying his best to not show the way goosebumps were bursting against his skin, his eyes locked on yours, trying to not get distracted by the way your wet skin made his mind spin.
“I don’t think I’m a brat,” you counter, getting close enough that he could feel the currents of the water with your movement. But you were far enough that Kirishima felt like pointing out the fact you disregarded his keep apart rule would be a mistake. “How am I a brat?”
The sound of the water rippling through the springs along with the growing noises of the bugs began a melody around the two of you, and all Kirishima could do was stare at the way you blinked your eyes slowly — like a feline stalking a prey.
“A lot of ways, really,” Kirishima breathes, his heart rising up to his throat as he felt your hands gingerly place themselves on his knees.
“Yeah?” you ask, parting through his naked legs, and Kirishima felt his breathing stop when your exposed chest pressed against his. Your lips were ghosting so far from his but tantalizingly close enough that he felt drunk off your sweet breath. “And what are you going to do about it?”
Kirishima sucked in air, his arms resisting movement, and his eyes glanced down at the way your mouth was millimeters from his. His dick was very much interested in what he could do about it, and when your hands grazed up his thigh and onto his chest, Kirishima could feel something rumble in his chest.
He moved to eliminate the space, but there was a crash in the following spring, pushing you away from him long before he could claim your mouth.
“FUCK!” the person in the opposite spring screamed, and Kirishima’s eyes closed in his muted annoyance as you sighed.
His eyes dropped to the water, giving you the privacy to rise out of the water and make your way over to the wall.
“Jenny, are you okay?” you called.
“Give me a warning the next time you try fucking your hot bodyguard in the middle of a private onsen!”
“We weren’t fucking you prude!”
And with that, Kirishima took this as his embarrassed cue to leave.
He stood at the entrance of your private spring for about twenty minutes, entirely uncomfortable with the still hard dick in his pants, rubbing and chaffing against his jeans as he stood there. Eventually, you exited the hot spring, face glowing from the steam and eyes avoiding his gaze as you walked back to your room. Your robe was tight on your body, the hair on the nape of your neck pressed to your skin.
Kirishima sighed as he watched you enter your room, your smile short as you nodded a simple goodnight before letting the door slam shut behind you.
Rubbing his face, Kirishima listened to the voices in his intercom talk about how nothing had happened tonight. An attempted unwelcome visitor tried to get into your room, but they had stopped him. They didn’t fight, but they had run away the moment they caught on to the fact that they weren’t exactly authentic.
Kirishima sighed as he slumped into his room, collapsing on the too small bed as he found himself looking at the ceiling in deep concentration.
What was he going to do now?
That was undeniably sexual, his still semi-hard dick damning evidence to the known fact that he wanted you. By god did he want you. Wanted you beneath him, over him, splitting yourself down onto his cock while you gripped your arms and legs around him, fucking down onto his driving cock. 
Kirishima groaned low in his chest, guilt blooming in the back of his throat as his palm rubbed his pulsing cock.
Bad, Kirishima, bad.
“Kirishima-san?” a voice broke through his earpiece, and Kirishima nearly jumped out of his skin. “Are you there?”
“Hi Kimiko,” Kirishima sighed, his dick deflating instantly. “Everything all right?”
“Ah, yes! Sorry about earlier, the false tip and the sudden abandonment!” Kimiko embarrassingly apologized. “My client was ringing for the fourth time, and while I care deeply for y/n, I had to take it!”
“Mm, no worries, Kimiko,” Kirishima smiled politely despite the lack of visual contact. “How can I help you?”
“Ah, yes,” Kimiko asserted, her tone changing from apology to one of formality. “So, about the visitor incident I’m sure you were brought attention to, it seems that the vehicle they came in was with the driver's plate: T082-23. Does that sound familiar?”
“Not currently,” Kirishima sighed, his body stretching into a sitting up position. “Does it to you?”
“No…” Kimiko admitted, and Kirishima could feel the worried frown on her face. “Well, I just wanted to call and give you that information. It was passed along to me, and they mentioned they hadn’t told you. And since I was going to give you the schedule for the upcoming JRA’s award day, I figured I’d let you know!”
“No problem! Let’s go over the schedule now?”
“Yes! I have a client meeting in America right after this! Can you believe it? An American celebrity wants my help?!”
“That sounds amazing, Kimiko!”
“Okay, so this is how the day’s going to go!”
Date: 7/10 Time: 18:00 Location: Tokyo Hotel Room 101
Kirishima watched as an entire team was getting you dressed up.
Two people were doing your hair, three people doing your nails, one person doing your makeup, and five getting one of your three outfits for the night ready.
According to you, as you had strutted around in these outfits nearly two weeks ago were your red carpet and beginning of the award show outfit, your performance outfit, and of course, the after-party outfit. Each one was different, yet when adorned on your body was a perfect replica of who you were.
Most importantly, the two of you had decided to ignore every single instance of tremendous sexual energy and desire that basically leaked from both of your pores. It was for the best to ignore it. There was no point in pursuing it, especially when there was a known hunt for you, and Kirishima was the last line of defense between you and whoever it was.
Whoever it was, pfft.
Kirishima was willing to bet on who it was already.
Since the night of the initial kidnapping that finally closed the gap between you and Kirishima, there was something that the caught criminal said that stuck with him.
Everything you had coming your way, you deserved, he had said in bitter spite.
The interesting thing was that it was the lawyer who had said that, multiple times at that. The lawyer seemed to have everything to fuel him to rage against you. Everything you said or tried, the lawyer was on your heel, barking at you that it was wrong. Kirishima had also seen the contracts between you and the lawyer, and the amount that he was paid to be your attorney was not large at all.
The mass majority of the funds you earned were always funneled towards charities and organizations you trusted to help people in need — in fact, it was almost 80% of your total earnings. A meek, barely larger than 20% was split between you, your lawyer, Kimiko, your music crew, and any other unforeseen expenses. The lawyer was also in a situation where he was not in demand with clients, and if you weren’t heeding his expensive tag, he needed a new contract with you.
A contract he was always demanding to discuss with you that you denied to change.
Attacks tended to happen days after you and the lawyer tumbled, not enough to rouse suspicion if you weren’t looking, but Kirishima was. He just needed damning evidence now.
Something.
Anything.
And for some reason, his gut was screaming at him that something big was going to happen tonight, that tonight was going to be the last attack—the one to end everything.
So he had told everyone about it. Kimiko, the security at the JRA’s, even you. It made him nervous.
It made his hand sweat, the gun strapped to his thigh feeling like hot iron as he stood about as you laughed with your makeup crew.
Kirishima swore, promised, and vowed he would protect you.
He was going to.
And when the gold dress was tied to your body, fitting you beautifully, Kirishima found himself unable to look away like strands of your hair framed your temples.
“What do you think, Kiri? Will I be on the Best Dressed List?” you asked, tearing Kirishima’s attention away from the bodice and skirt of the dress. Your eyes were bright, hopeful, yearning for a positive reaction from him.
“How could you not be?” Kirishima admitted, his grin toothy, and he shifted against the wall.
“You’ll make me blush,” you grin back, eyes batting just a bit as you clasp your hands together. It takes everything in Kirishima to keep from striding across the space between the two of you and kissing you silly. “Are we ready to go?”
Kirishima wet his lips, unwillingly tearing his gaze from you, and whispers into the intercom.
“Ready to move out?”
“We’re all clear.”
Straightening back up, Kirishima smiled at you, his head motioning towards the door.
“Alright, y/n, let’s see you make some history?”
“Damn right I will.”
Kirishima smiled as he exited first, carving the path for you. 
Paparazzi were on you immediately, the lights flashing and terribly bright as he helped you through the throngs of them. His hand pressed to your back as they screamed demands, most of which you complied with until Kirishima stated that you would be late. You, unfortunately, couldn’t be late to the awards show.
Ushering you into the limousine, Kirishima follows in shortly after you, scrunching up in his seat as he sits opposite of you. However, your typical light and bright demeanor are gone; instead, you seem almost anxious as you open your handbag.
“You okay there?” Kirishima asks as he realizes you pulled out a distinctly obvious metal flask.
“Awards make me nervous,” you painfully admit; you're weakly smiling as you knock back a shot of the drink. “I hate winning and losing; the alcohol makes me less… of a wreck. Do you want some? I think it’s apple soju, I don’t know, a good luck gift from Kimiko.”
Kirishima grins, his eyes rolling as he decides to decline the drink. “Sorry, love, I think that I need to be completely sober for today.”
You scrunch your nose, obviously displeased, “Lame, who shows up to these awards sober?”
“Me,” Kirishima laughed, his head tilting back and scraping against the ceiling of the limousine. 
“Such a prude, sober, pervert,” you sigh, taking yet another swig before putting the flask back into your bag. 
“Such a brat.”
Just like every previous instance, your eyes seem to glow in glee at that name, your lips curling into a pleased smirk as you shrug. It's a sight that makes Kirishima’s mouth dry and heart racing. Fuck, he should not be thinking about fucking you in the limousine right now.
But before the heat in the limousine could simmer to one of undeniable boiling, you had arrived.
Kirishima cleared his throat, sending a quick wink your way as he exited the car first. The first stop was for him to join the lineup to guide you through all the different photo and interview sessions. No one wanted pictures of him emerging from the limo after all. 
There's a moment where after Kirishima closes the door, your eyes filled with worry and excitement as he winked goodbye, that things changed. He stood up, his eyes already scanning the area for anything suspicious, when he saw the all too familiar van.
T082-23.
His eyes widened, his head looking around for anyone else, but there was no one to help. No one could do anything as the car continued to drive away, disappearing from Kirishima’s line of sight. His heart hammered in his chest, and his hands instinctively went to his thigh. He had his firearm… he had it.
With nothing but a quick report to the head of security via his com, Kirishima pushed on ahead, waiting for your descent down the red carpet.
When you eventually emerged from the limousine, Kirishima found that at this moment, the entire world faded away as a gloved hand assisted you out of the vehicle. You were elegant, stunning, a realistic vibrant portrait within his world of greys. As you took photos for the cameras, he was by your side a few strides away as you talked to reporters.
You really came to life right now.
You were beautiful.
“For all the pain in the world that she is, she’s quite charming from a distance, huh?” a voice spoke to his side, and Kirishima froze. His eyes widened completely when he noticed that standing beside him was none other than the lawyer.
The lawyer was dressed in a nice suit, glasses perched on his nose, and for the first time Kirishima had seen, the scowl was not quite so hard.
He was here.
Every warning bell sounded in Kirishima’s head.
This was the man he was so sure was the reason behind your every attack. A man fueled by insufficient funding, a need for a new contract that would never be approved without your signature.
“What are you doing here?” Kirishima asked, subtlety never being something he was ever good with. “I’ve never seen you anywhere except to argue with Y/n about contracts. This doesn’t seem like the appropriate time to be discussing it.”
“Kimiko wanted me to give her a new contract proposal to give to y/n. However, to be fair, it’s quite easy for anything to come down to an argument with y/n,” he shrugs, and Kirishima watches a cloud of emotions pass between the man’s eyes. “At least between her and me, we’ve never gotten along, but I suppose that’s how it is for any type of family who works together.”
Wait.
“What?! Family member?!”
“Yes, I know it’s strange to believe. I am quite ugly, and she is not, but we’re family.”
Kirishima’s mind was racing now. It didn’t make sense. If he was family, why would he be in such pursuit of potentially murdering you? If you were family, he was sure that you would help out? If he needed a raise like he thought, wouldn’t you have helped?
There was no way you wouldn’t.
Was he wrong?
Who was it?
“Kiri!” your voice broke into his mind and tore him back to reality. You waved at him, then passed a stuck-out tongue to the lawyer in a teasing fashion. “Let’s go in?”
Kirishima looked over at the lawyer who greeted a woman, who was also walking down the red carpet, a celebrity he could name no less, with a warm kiss. 
Oh fuck.
He needed to call Kimiko; he was so very wrong.
You had won two awards so far, and at this very moment, Kirishima was being ushered back to his seat in the audience as you were being escorted to the main stage to perform your latest song. You had removed your gold dress for a black, sleek gown. Your lipstick changed to a dark red, and your hands trembled in the white lace gloves you wore.
“Oh, Kiri,” you wheezed almost, your hands shaking as the announcers on stage were announcing the last awards before your performance. “I’m getting nervous. What if I mess up or sing off-key? I’d be the laughing stock!”
Kirishima laughed gently, his hands easily encompassing your waist as he stilled your frantic moves. “Y/l/n y/n, if there is anything I know for sure about you is that you are one hell of a singer and a performer. The awards you’re nominated for tonight speak for themselves! You never fail at your performances, and even if you somehow manage to sing off-key, I’m sure that no one would notice! Your biggest fan in the world won’t notice, at least.”
Not more than seven days ago, when you had cried about the impending nerves of being an artist, Kirishima had come to claim the title of being your biggest fan in the world. It had made you chuckle through your tears before coming near a hysterical laugh as the two of you held each other close.
“You’re a nut, Kirishima Eijirou,” you laugh, hands resting on his lower ribs, but your smile was bright, warm. You paused a bit, fingers pulling at the fabric of his shirt. “I’ll sing just for you then, but I think I should take another swig of that soju.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“Could you tell that Takeyama is completely drunk off her ass?”
“...she’s drunk?!”
“Exactly, I’ll be fine,” you breathe, taking a new smaller flask from the purse Kirishima was holding for you and taking the final swig. Your face contorts at the bitter liquid. “Ew, Kimiko really fucked me over with this one. Why is it blue?! Have you ever seen blue apple soju?!”
“No?” Kirishima startled, his eyes looking at the indeed splash of blue liquid tainting a small part of your gloves. “Who gave you that one? What happened with the other flask of yours?”
“Oh, Kimiko sent it along after I lost my other one; it’s her own flask,” you said before the backstage crew whisked you away to begin your set, and without you, Kirishima was sent to the audience.
Kirishima felt trapped as he was ushered into his seat, his eyes scanning the entire audience for something suspicious, a familiar face perhaps. His broad shoulders continued to bump into his neighbors, their disgruntled noises doing nothing to stop his worry.
“And now, Y/n,” came the strong voice of the male announcer, and the light dimmed.
Kirishima watched as the spotlight came down upon you, a golden halo of colors against your darkened gown as the instrumentals began to play in the background. And he saw you take a step forward, the building motifs suddenly silencing when you finally sang the first note.
Despite the panic arising in Kirishima, the unknown of who was behind it all, what was going to happen, he stilled at the unmatched strength and ambiance of your voice.
You sang as you did at every stage, to every audience.
There was a reason why you were considered a legend.
And then, with one last sound, one last melody, and your hand holding your microphone dropped. Your chest heaving, tears falling down your face, and the roar of the audience was silent. You looked through the audience, unable to see, but for some reason, you just knew where Kirishima was.
You smile.
But as the looming sounds begin to fill your ear again, you find that the world is hazy.
You swallow, eyes unfocused as you bowed, hurrying to leave the stage.
Kirishima watched as you took a final stumbling step off the stage, something he felt was going to be written off as you stepped on your dress. But his mind whirled.
The lawyer felt like a setup; the contracts made no sense, the blue soju.
How were they related?
What connected them?
“Oh, fuck,” Kirishima whispered, horrified, and immediately his finger pressed to his earpiece. “Find Y/n! Now!”
Kirishima was racing through the back of the venue, the announcers' voices still ringing through the dirty, bleak hallways. You had just won but was written off as being somewhere backstage; after all, the show must go on.
Voices screamed in his earpiece, each declining to have found you. No one had seen you after you stepped off the stage. No one knew who had taken you.
Kirishima noticed the doors closing at the end of the hallway, and with a dreading sense of doom, Kirishima removed the gun from his harness. And with the devil on his heels, he ran.
Kirishima panted as he looked before him.
You were passed out, draped limp, confused, and woozy against Kimiko’s body, and two men knocked unconscious beside them. To anyone else, it looked as if Kimiko had saved you, some guardian angel within this world, but if Kirishima’s gut meant anything, he knew better.
“Kirishima-san!’ Kimiko squeaked as Kirishima raised his gun, his body tense, unwilling to take a chance on her. “I don’t know what those two were doing! I was saving her, I swear!”
“Don’t do this, Kimiko,” Kirishima whispered, his head shaking. “I figured it out.”
There was a shift in Kimiko’s face at that; the scared unknowing hero melted into one of anger, resentment, one of someone who knew they had been outed.
“So, you figured it out,” she bitterly spoke, her arms that were supporting you from behind revealing to be a firearm of your own. “I didn’t expect you to.”
“I can’t say I figured out your reasoning; honestly, it doesn’t make sense to me, but I felt like it was you,” Kirishima carefully states, his heart roaring at the implied danger of the firearm against your chin. “Don’t do anything stupid, Kimiko.”
Kimiko stares, her lips forming a small o before changing into one of a large, near unattached grin.
“Anything stupid? If anyone is doing anything stupid, it's this selfish prick!” Kimiko spits, her arms tightening around you, making you whimper ever so gently in pain. “She thinks she’s so great, so rich, so smart! Just because she wastes most of her money on stupid shit like charity! Everyone thinks working for her is a dream, but they’re all blind idiots!”
Kirishima’s eyes widen as he notices the glazed, unfocused of your eyes as you shift your attention over to him. Were you listening?
“What’s wrong with the contract?” he asks, a small attempt to diffuse the situation.
“The fact she pays me next to nothing, and yet she works me half to death!”
“You have multiple clients, don’t you?” Kirishima splutters, unsure as to what was wrong. “Why is this one contract so important you wanted to frame her lawyer?!”
Kimiko laughs; it’s pitchy, almost hysterical as she bends over, your body slumping further onto the floor. “That was a lie! All a fucking lie! Do you know that I knew no one when I first started? Y/n is a name everyone wants. I don’t need to do anything to get her things! The world wants her! But the other clients? None of them stayed, none of them wanted me past a month! The salary was okay when she was a snot-nosed brat, but ten years later?! NO! She won’t fucking listen. She never fucking listens to anything but herself! So she has the option to give me the eighty percent, or fucking die here!”
Suddenly the gun in Kirishima’s hand feels like a ton, the skin on the back of his neck crawling and slicking with sweat.
“You know how much those charities mean to her,” Kirishima whispers. “She won’t do it.”
Kimiko trembles for a second, her arm holding the firearm lowering as she looks at the wall, shaking.
“Oh my god… you’re right,” Kimiko realizes, horror and uncertainty flashing across her face. “I guess… she has to die, oh my god, she has to die.”
At that moment, the world slowed down, and Kirishima swore he could see the atoms, the electricity flowing through the space between them. Kimiko’s arm holding the gun raising back up to your temple, her smile detached, horrific yet gleeful.
His body trembled as he doubted himself, his mind unsure if the finger on the trigger was going to be strong enough to fire away. Could he do it?
Was he ready?
Actually ready?
Save her, his past whispered.
Save her, his nightmares screamed.
Save her, his heart yelled.
Kirishima raised his arm, his focus blaring, his past just for a moment, forgotten.
BANG!
“The effects of the rohypnol have already worn out. Thankfully she wasn’t given a whole pill. If she experiences any nausea or throws up, please bring her back, should anything else happen, she’ll be okay.”
The words of the doctor rang in Kirishima’s ears. For tonight, they were going to be discharging you to him. Thankfully, it was all happening in Tokyo, so Kirishima’s apartment was near, and if Bakugou was true to his word, it was clean.
With the help of hospital security, he had managed to get your tuxedo concealed body into a car, and the two of you rode off to his apartment. You’ve been silent the entire time, eyes downcasted as you sit pressed to his side, feeling like a small child compared to him. You knew that he was much larger than you, a near two feet taller, but this felt unmatched. 
Kirishima’s jacket was warm around you, it’s sheer largeness another dress on your body, and despite the horrific turn of events, you were feeling warm. You couldn’t remember much of what transpired after stumbling off stage, but you did remember Kirishima bursting through the doors, a look of anger and fear blistering off his person in such a way that made you whimper when you remembered.
You remembered the onsen basically every night, cursing your stupid makeup team for interrupting a night that definitely would have ended with you fucking Kirishima. You cursed yourself for being a coward and not just saying fuck it and fucking him afterward despite the brief awkwardness.
He wanted you, it was clear as day, and you wanted him as well.
Tonight.
“Sorry about how small my apartment is, or if it’s messy, I don’t actually know if my friends have been keeping up with it,” Kirishima apologized, guiding you into the apartment by the small of your back. “You’ll be safe here tonight, and I promise we can get back to your own place tomorrow!”
“Oh, don’t apologize, it’s okay,” you smile, feeling flushed as you cross the entryway to the apartment. His apartment, despite not being home in so long, is clean. The halls aren’t messy, and a hint of lavender is saturated to the air. The dim hallway lights were barely bright enough to cause you to squint as it was dark out. “Thank you for having me tonight, especially after everything.”
At the hospital, you had been given a pair of sweats and a cotton t-shirt. The change in outfit from your event dress was definitely needed, and even though you were sure your makeup was streaked down your face, you felt good hidden in the depths of Kirishima’s jacket.
“Are you hungry?” Kirishima asked, handing over his guest slippers, which you gratefully accepted. “I might have some microwaveable food leftover.”
“Ramen doesn’t sound too bad,” you admit as Kirishima unbuttons the first few buttons on his white dress shirt. You were instantly captivated by the movement, your eyes shifting back to his face when he began to walk off towards the kitchen.
Kirishima talked warmly, keeping the conversation going merrily and bright throughout the entire time in the kitchen. He undoubtedly knew you weren’t entirely okay, and at moments like this, you were entirely grateful for his sweet personality. 
To be fair, you knew that you had been quite unfair to Kirishima in the beginning. Looking back at the first entire month of knowing him, you were horrified and impressed that Kirishima didn’t demand to be dropped. You had been selfish, stubborn, a bottom line brat, and he took it day after day. It wasn’t that you disliked him back then; hell, you had been in a near state of delirium when he entered the door during your first meeting because you had no idea such huge men existed to the caliber of his hotness.
But you resisted and might have been harsher than needed.
It was okay now; after all, if he was genuinely bitter about that entire month still, the onsen said otherwise.
It didn’t take long for your stomach to be filled with warm broth, soft boiled eggs, and ramen noodles. Kirishima did, in fact, have ramen, fresh eggs, and some vegetables. In a grand act of preparing you the most sufficient dinner he could, Kirishima presented this under budget ramen and laughed when you said it was terrific.
But it was growing late.
The two of you still sat at his table that was full of a card game, your empty ramen bowls, and cups of water. The clock on the oven read 23:38, and the city lights were slowly dying.
“Are you ready for bed?” Kirishima eventually asked you. 
You looked up from your joined hands; your fingers had been playing with his thick and long fingers for some time now. The apartment grew steadily quieter as you studied and attempted to memorize each callous and scar on his hands. They were definitely marked and nicked, the sign of the warrior he once was.
“Depends on the bed,” you tease, lips rising into a small smile as you compare your much tinier hands than his. Your fingertips barely passed the edge of his palm. “What does a big guy like you sleep in? A twin? Tatami mat?”
Kirishima laughed, his hands twisting in yours, wrapping it around so that he raised your hands up to press a kiss to the center of your palms. 
“A futon, brat,” Kirishima explained, his smile small but sharp with his humor. “Let’s get you to bed?”
You frown. 
“Where will you be sleeping then?”
“My couch is just fine.”
“I’m sure your stuffing in a trash bag had holes in it.”
“That’s okay,” Kirishima laughed, standing up and quickly taking you to your feet as well. “It’s just for a night, I’ll live.”
Your face warmed immediately as he guided you down the hallway of his apartment before finally coming into what was definitely his room.
Kirishima’s scent was faint in this room, cinnamon, wood, and warm spices. It made your eyes flutter as you observed his room from the entryway as he began to set up the room. 
His eye for interior decoration was quite… different. You smiled brightly as you glanced around; the diverse and rather boyish decorations around the room warmed your heart. It seemed exactly like what you would think of for Kirishima. 
“Well, that’s all!” Kirishima exclaimed, his hands landing on his hips in triumph as he looked around. “The bathroom is the next door over, and I’ll leave a toothbrush out for you. I also left out a new t-shirt of mine if you want to change!”
You nod some more, watching as Kirishima seems unsure of what to do next. He looks around, coughs a bit before nodding.
“Okay, I’ll be leaving—”
“Um, can we talk?” you interrupt, arms wrapping around your body. “I have some things I want to say.”
“Oh, sure!”
“You can sit,” you say, motioning toward the bed. “I have a few things to get off my chest.”
Kirishima pauses for a bit, his eyes looking you over before he eventually nods, and he sits down. The bed slightly creaks under his weight, and you feel your body warm-up at the sound. You want to hear the bed creak more, to rock under the weight of you and him pressed against the sheets as you cried his name.
“What is it?” he asks gently, observing you.
“I just…” you huff, words failing you, your tongue feeling heavy. “I wanted to say thank you for saving me.”
“It was my job to do that,” Kirishima smiled warmly, his arms crossing again.
He was relaxed.
“I mean, I can’t even begin to believe that it was Kimiko who was behind all that, even though we know it was… I know it was,” you trail off, shivering slightly as you remember your ex-managers demented laugh in your ear. “I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”
“Nothing would’ve happened to you,” Kirishima spoke with finality. “I promised to myself at the first meeting I was going to protect you, hell the entire world would. You’re not going to be taken down by pathetic people like that, not you.”
“Really?”
“One hundred percent.”
“I feel like I should repay you in some way, though,” you rub the back of your neck, eyes fluttering just the slightest bit flirtatious. Kirishima looked at you with full mooned eyes, his arms unfolding and his palms resting onto the bedspread.
“You repay me plenty already,” came his whispered answer, so quiet, so pure you almost smiled. “You don’t have to do anything.”
Your tongue pushes past your lip, wetting the drying skin as you take a step toward him. The shoulders of the jacket slowly fall from your own shoulders, pooling just above your elbows as you stop before him, hands resting daintily on his broad shoulders.
“And what if I want something?” you ask, finding yourself stemming with energy as his legs part, allowing you closer access to him. 
You step in closer and closer until your outer thighs are ghosting against the inner part of his.
“I think it’s in our contract for me to do everything that you request if I remember correctly,” Kirishima whispers, his bright clear red eyes turning a burnt shade: dark and ever consuming. 
“And if I want you to finish what you started over at the onsen?” you press, fingers curling against the muscles of his shoulders before locking behind his neck.
His nose was brushing against yours, cold yet burning against your own skin.
“I’ll gladly show you what I wanted to do that night,” he grunts, eyes deadly, and for the first time, his hands held your waist.
You took a second to recover, your skin sparking with the electricity of his touch, and you suppressed a shiver as you opened your eyes.
“Do it,” you cement your fates, “coward.”
And just like that, in a movement so euphoric, Kirishima’s mouth crashed against yours.
His mouth was hot, dangerous against yours -- a live wire sparking with uncontrollable energy and heat as your mouths danced. Hot puffs of air were passed between your mouths, your fingers shaking with an undeniable release of tension and want. 
The kiss was sloppy, desperate, so needy with unspoken frantic determination to fuck each other until the other could no longer move. 
Kirishima’s hand removed the jacket from your arms, letting the expensive material fall onto the floor with a heavy thud. Despite the lack of warmth the clothing provided, the feeling of Kirishima’s hands rubbing against your bare arms sent your mind spiraling.
“Get on the bed,” Kirishima commands against your mouth. “Let me fuck you.”
The words were nearly embarrassingly desperate, but the tone of his voice spoke of the absolute domination he wished to assert on you. He wanted you in one exact way, and you had a feeling you knew what it was. But if he had been paying attention, Kirishima should already know that getting you to listen was not easy.
“No,” you grin against his mouth.
Kirishima pulls away instantly, his lips red and swollen as he replays your word in his head. He looks frazzled, absolutely delirious already at the simple, passion-filled makeout. As soon as his eyes clear away the fog, your grin drops, and instead, you look at him with fierce determination and defiance. 
“No?” he repeats.
“No,” you confirm.
Your chest feels light, your head spinning as the hands on your waist tighten, and his eyes flash dangerously. The tip of his tongue pushes past his lips before quickly disappearing again. 
“Of course, you’re a brat in bed too, such a fucking princess,” Kirishima shakes his head, but his mouth curving into a shark-like grin. 
Menacing, promising, sending chilling shivers down your spine.
The world spins faster than you can keep up, your mouth opening to shriek as Kirishima easily lifts you up, and has you lying against his lap. 
“I’m going to let you in on a little secret, princess,” Kirishima begins, his large fingers hooking into the waistband of the sweats you have on and the panties you’re wearing. “My princess gets rewards for being good. If she can behave properly, she gets to be fucked with dick, her pussy gets to be fucked just the way she pleases.”
You can’t help but stifle a moan that threatens to spill out with his words and the way his hands move down the curve of your ass, exposing the naked skin to him. The waistband of both your panties and sweats stay high up your thighs, and it’s almost embarrassing to know you’re still so clothed despite what’s to come.
“And just what does the Sergeant do to bad girls?” you ask, unable to keep your tongue down, your hips rolling against his lap in undeserved friction.
Unexpectedly, abruptly, a hand comes down harshly onto your bare ass.
The contact is rough, stinging against your ass as you cry out in slight pain.
The hand not currently rubbing a warning circle into your ass twists the hair at the top of your head, lifting your head up so that your ear could near his mouth.
“Bad girls get punishments. They get what I want to give them. Nothing more, nothing less.”
“Holy shit,” you whimper, heat flaring between your thighs at the thought of Kirishima doing anything to you regardless of if you were good or bad. You rut your ass back against his hand, longing for a heavier touch, a plea for something more.
“What does the princess want?”
“Nothing,” you bite, and the crashing smack of another spank has you moaning loudly at the stinging pleasure-filled pain. 
“You moaning like a whore at a simple spank says otherwise,” Kirishima chuckles darkly, his fingers pinching your stinging ass as your body bucks against him. He spanks you again, again, and again. Each slap is intentful, powerful, wanting to get you to admit what you want, and you cry against your hands each time, your eyes fluttering as the pain feels good. 
“Of course, a slut like you would be getting off on this,” Kirishima seems amused, his thick finger pressing to the slit of your cunt, spreading your dripping essence against your cunt. He presses against your entrance with just the tip of his finger, and you shriek in a sound for more, your hips jerking backward to get his finger into you, to fuck you with those thick fingers to do something about the growing desperate heat. 
“Kirishima!” you scream, your body sweating and twisting on his lap, desperate to find some way to get him to finger fuck you. 
“Ah, there we go,” he sighs in delight as his fingers swirl at your entrance, increasing the teasing and making your mind spin. “Tell me what you want, brat.”
“You!” you wail, two of his fingers carting between your wet, sloppy heated lips. They graze your clit, stimulating you further as you can do nothing but instinctively jerk against his hold, trying to get him to give you the needed pleasure to build up to an orgasm. “I want you to fuck me so good! Please, Sergeant, please, I want you to fuck me until I can’t remember anything but your name.”
“But you haven’t proven to be a good princess,” Kirishima tuts, his hands disappearing from your pussy despite your crying pleas. His hand grabs your ass, though, massaging the abused skin, grasping it tightly.
You moan, embarrassed at the sensation of his massive hand easily cupping your ass cheek, your fingers fisting into the fabric of his pants as you shake your head.
“Are you going to prove that you’re good?” he asks you, his tone like that of a parent chastising a child. “Gonna prove to me that you can be good?”
You shake pathetically against his legs, but you can’t keep yourself from shaking your head. You can’t prove to him that you would be.
“I can’t!” you whimper loudly, your body twisting on his lap to look up at him, your eyes filled with tears and pleading need. Kirishima looked down at you with lust filled eyes and an undeniable need to be followed.
“You can’t?” he repeats, his head tilting, eyes narrowing, and his fingers dug into your ass. “Or you won’t?”
You tremble on top of him, unable to answer because you weren’t ready to hand over the reins just yet. You didn’t want to submit so fast, you wanted to make his own head dizzy with need but the stubbornness to continue punishing you the way he was promising.
“I won’t,” you gasp, eyes fluttering at the way he finally drops your head.
You gasp loudly as you find him shoving you off his lap, and with your panties and sweats sitting so awkwardly high on your legs, you find yourself tumbling off his lap and onto the floor.
“Guess if you don’t want to behave, I’ll treat you like some fucking pussy pocket and dispose of you once I’m done,” Kirishima easily breathes, and you look up at the now standing man as he tears his shirt off.
Your mouth waters, your cunt throbbing at the sight of the rippling muscles and dark lines of his tattoos on his upper body. You watch fascinated, like one does to a masterpiece, as he undresses until he’s in nothing but his socks. And at the sight of his dick, you can feel at once all the blood in your flushed face drop directly into your throbbing cunt.
He was fucking enormous, his girth barely fitting into his hand, and the angry red head spilled its precum against his abs. A black happy trail connecting Kirishima’s abs to his vein throbbing cock.
Holy fuck, he could quickly kill you with that.
Kirishima doesn’t ask any questions as he watches your awkwardly dressed state of a body on the floor. His head is tilted upwards, a small pleased smile on his face as he looks down on you, his hand slowly, leisurely fisting his cock as you can do nothing but stare.
You make some insane noise at the back of your throat at this sight, your thighs trembling with need, and you're pushing off your side, your ass burning, and your balance off as you open your mouth, offering all you could to him.
And thankfully, Kirishima allows it.
He’s much too tall for you to suck him off on your knees, so he sits back down onto the bed, letting you scamper between his legs, mouth open wide like some needy pet.
“Such a good little slut,” Kirishima sighs, sinking his cock into your wet, hot mouth. “Such a fucking cockwhore, all it took was a single glance for you to lose your will.”
You whine against his dick, your jaw tight with the stretch, your tongue lapping so desperately around the cock that was no more than halfway in yet couldn’t go in any further.
“Suck me right, and I’ll reward you by fucking that pretty little pussy of yours,” Kirishima grunts, his fingers pressing into the side of your neck as he ruts his hips up into your mouth, shoving his cock even further into your mouth. “And don’t you dare look away from me while you suck me off.”
It feels like fire.
His cock driving down your throat hurts, the taste of his salty pre-cum slathering all over your tongue and dripping out of your mouth with the saliva you can’t control. His cock hits the back of your throat, and you continue to bob your head, continue to fuck him with your throat as animalistic, praiseworthy noises begin spilling from Kirishima’s mouth.
You whimper at the sight of his head dipping back, and you nearly whine when he shoves the fingers he had gathered your juices on into his mouth. He moans at the contact and with his pleasure with your actions so obvious as you choke against his girth. That was hot, holy fuck, you wanted him to fuck you, please fuck you. 
Your eyes close as he begins to fuck faster into your mouth, his delight in hearing you choke around him his driving force. Tears start pouring from your eyes despite your best efforts, your throat and inner thighs burning with lust and need as Kirishima groans, his cock twitching deep in your throat.
Slap!
“Hey!”
Slap!
You gag harshly as your cheeks sting with his heavy slap, your teeth grazing underneath his cock, right against a thick, twisting vein.
“Did I tell you to close your eyes?” Kirishima practically growls, his hands grasping the back of your neck, the other one slapping you across the face yet again. “No. I said… fuck… I said, keep your eyes on me!”
Tears weep down your face, your eyes struggling to keep focus on him as he continued to fuck deep and intensely into your mouth, shoving himself further into you until you could feel his thighs grazing your chin. Oxygen wasn’t flowing anymore; your gags and chokes the only time the burning element could manage to flow through you, but Kirishima doesn’t seem to care. He seems to delight in the way you are, despite it all, are moaning and looking at him in a pleading way for more.
More, you plead.
And he delivers. 
Kirishima pulls his still hard, not yet cummed, dick out of your mouth and stands. 
You splutter with the sudden intake of oxygen to your lungs, burning you from the inside out as you splutter on the ground.
“W-What’s going on?” you hoarsely stammer, your jaw and throat aching from its prolonged abuse. “E-Ei?”
However, Kirishima seems dead set on getting you naked, and you squeal in flustered excitement as he rips the shirt off of you and his mouth pressing against yours again. His mouth crashes against yours, and you moan into his mouth immediately.
His tongue curls into your mouth and your tongues press and rub against each other. Each passing second growing more desperate, needier, more intense as your clothes are ripped one by one off your body.
“Holy fuck, I’ve wanted you for so long,” Kirishima nearly whines, his mouth trailing down your neck, biting and sucking against every centimeter of skin he passed. “Wanted to fuck you against the wall, in my bed, and now I get to do that.”
“Please, please, fuck me, please,” you beg, your voice bordering a wail as your arms wrap around his neck, letting him lift you up off the floor. Despite you being so much smaller than him that when he held you to him, your cunt wasn’t pressed to his angry leaking cock, you continued to desperately roll your hips against his abs, the friction welcomed and easing the building pressure. It was an action conveying just what you wanted. “I need you in me, Sergeant!”
“Just cuz… holy fuck,” Kirishima breathes ragged, his body twisting around, and you cried when the cold sheets pressed into your back. “Imma fuck you, Imma… god, just fucking watch.”
Your head thrashed back onto the pillow as Kirishima’s teeth sunk into your collarbone, then captured your sensitive nipples, his fingers dancing against your clit and teasing your center. 
“Now!” you cry, fingers digging into his shoulder. “Put it in!”
This time, Kirishima didn’t need to be told twice.
His larger body was suddenly pressed entirely against yours, dwarfing you immediately as your arms wrapped around his back as his cock slammed into you. You screamed at the sudden intrusion, your pussy stretched beyond its typical limits by his girth, his size, his power.
Your cunt throbbed around him, your face buried within his pecs as you, despite the searing pain, shove your hips up towards him. Fucking into him, sucking him further into you.
“Holy shit,” Kirishima groans, “you’re amazing.”
“Talk less, fuck me more!” you screech, your body spasming, twitching so hard from the splitting pleasure and the lava pit in your stomach, and Kirishima does that exactly.
His hips begin to meet yours in equaled power, slamming into you so that the bed creaked beneath you. He fucked you until he had to hold a hand on your hip so you could stay there, and you kept a hand on the wall to continue to push yourself down onto his cock.
You screamed with pleasure, cried for more, Kirishima’s shark-like smirk getting bolder, darker, hotter with every slam of his hips until his tattooed right arm shot down. His hand wrapped around your throat, choking you.
“You’re so loud, princess,” Kirishima moans, clearly liking your loud noises, “but you’re going to wake everyone in Tokyo.”
His hand around your throat is enough to have your legs trembling around his waist, your choked and muffled moans and splutters drowning out even more as he pressed a kiss onto you. He kissed you, licking your mouth, and devouring your every word and thought. Your core twisted, tightened, and burned. It throbbed and clenched with it’s impending orgasm, and your body began to tense to the heavens as his cock throbbed deep within you.
“Who saved you?”
“E-Ei did,” you garble.
“Who’s fucking you?”
“E-Ei is!”
“Who’s going to fucking cum when I tell her to?”
“Me! Fuck, me!”
Kirishima laughs, his arms wrapping around your waist, and in one final, fleeting burst of strength, fucks into you with his own power, needs, and desire, and you can only take it. “Cum, princess,” he whispered almost sweetly against the top of your head, and it was all over. Your teeth sink into his chest as you scream, a blinding white light erupting through your vision as you cum around his cock.
Kirishima whimpers, his cock still pushing deep into your cunt, until you can feel the warm spill of his seed in your womb.
He collapses to the side of you, taking you with him so that you were resting on his sweaty chest.
“Holy shit,” Kirishima whispered after a bit, your body already warm and too lethargic to notice the star-like tone to his voice. “That was fucking… holy shit.”
“Does this mean you like me?” you half tease, half wonder.
There’s a pause, a silence, and you wonder if maybe he had fallen asleep.
But he didn’t.
“I’ve been in love with you for some time now, I think,” he admits, his hand beginning to rub small circles into your back.
You find that despite the exhaustion, warmth floods your cheeks.
“Oh?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I guess we’re going to have to discuss a more… permanent and maybe different contract tomorrow morning, huh?”
Kirishima chuckles, and you find yourself smiling into his chest.
“I think we do.”
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imaginemcyt · 3 years ago
Text
sisterinnit!
cc!wilbur soot x tommy’s older sister
tw: language
note: this one uses specifically she/her pronouns, however, you can replace them with your pronouns. it won’t change the story at all. sorry that this is kinda shit but tumblr deleted my draft and i had to completely rewrite it so this is what i’ve got. hope you enjoy! <3
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“y/n this is wilbur, wilbur this is y/n.” tommy gave the basic introductions with a bored look on his face.
“y/n simons, pleasure to meet you.”
“wilbur soot, the pleasure is all mine.”
as he shook your hand, you stared into each other’s eyes. he wore a small smile, that was almost a smirk. was it just you, or was there electricity when your hands touched? that had to be in your head, right? your gaze lingered on the other for perhaps a little too long before you let go of each other’s hands.
“now get out, y/n.” tommy pushed you towards the door.
•••
“y/n can you see wilbur out? i’m busy!”
wilbur looked at you with a smile, causing you to blush. you nodded and yelled back at your brother, “yeah!”
you led wilbur to the front door, opening it and stepping to the side. you looked at him to find he was already looking at you. he grabbed your hand and placed a kiss on your knuckles.
“it was nice meeting you, y/n.”
as you stuttered out a reply, he gave you that same almost-smirk and turned away, walking down your driveway.
•••
“what are you doing up?”
you jumped, not expecting to see someone in your kitchen at two am. then you remembered tommy had invited friends over.
“oh, it’s you. i… i can’t sleep. what are you still doing awake?”
you filled a glass up with water and began to drink it, putting it in the sink when you were done.
“tommy snores really loud.”
you both let out a light laugh at your younger brother’s expense.
“well, since we’re both awake, do you want to do something? we could watch friends? that’s all i was doing anyway.”
“that sounds great.”
you both made your way up the stairs and into your room. you sat on the bed and set up the laptop with the episode you were currently on. eventually you were laying down together watching joey do lunges in all of chandler’s clothes.
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(like this ^^^)
you were about halfway through a second episode when tommy interrupted.
“what the hell are you guys doing?”
you both looked up at the tired gremlin child.
“watching friends.” wilbur gave him a cheeky smile.
•••
“hello?”
“oh! uh, hello…?”
“oh it’s you, wilbur!” you spoke over your brother’s headset while he was in the bathroom.
“y/n? hi! what are you doing?”
“well tommy’s in the toilet so i wanted to see who he was talking to. turns out it’s you!”
wilbur let out a chuckle. “it’s me!”
“GET OUT OF MY BEDROOM!”
“uh oh, gotta go!” you threw down the headset before running for your life.
•••
“y/n, hang out with us!”
you stopped at the doorway, looking back at the group of boys all sitting on the floor. jack manifold, tubbo, and wilbur all stared up at you.
“no, y/n, get out of my room.” tommy spoke from his spot on the bed.
“aww, why can’t she stay?”
“yeah, tommy, don’t be a dick, man.”
“y/n, stay!”
“no, y/n, leave.”
you looked nervous, being pulled in two different directions, before ultimately deciding that you had other things to do.
“sorry guys, i should probably go.”
a chorus of disappointed groans and “aww”s left the group before you waved and closed the door behind you.
you went back to your room, deciding to give your brother his space despite your loneliness and boredom. you knew you’d want the same from him.
you decided to mess around with your ukulele to pass the time. you played your favorite song, singing along quietly. it wasn’t long before a knock on the door made you stop.
“come in.”
the door opened and none other than wilbur soot popped his head in.
“hey.”
“hey. tommy asked me to tell you to shut up, but i think you sound lovely.”
you turned slightly pink. “oh, uh, thanks. tell tommy i’m sorry and i’ll keep it down.”
“no need, he’s a prick anyway.” he made his way to where you sat on the bed, taking a seat next to you.
“what are you playing?”
you smiled and told him about how it was your favorite song by your favorite artist and you loved how fun it was. he requested you play a little bit for him, so you did. when you were done, you started to talk about it a little more.
at least until you realized he wasn’t listening. he was staring at your lips, leaning in. you followed suit.
the door burst open, causing you two to spring apart.
“wilbur, what the hell is taking so long? and what are you two doing in here with the door closed?”
wilbur smiled at tommy. “playing music, of course.”
tommy gave a skeptical look, dragging wilbur out of the room with a “keep it down, y/n!”
wilbur stopped at the doorway. “by the way, i quite like hanging out with you, y/n.”
•••
“your hands are so tiny!”
“they are not,” you gasped. “your hands are just huge, probably because you’re a giant of a man.”
wilbur laughed. “put your hand up,” he instructed. he touched his to yours gently, showing off the size difference.
you both giggled before stopping and looking into each other’s eyes. he gave you a gentle smile and slipped his fingers in between yours, interlocking them and holding your hand in his larger one.
you looked back at him and smiled.
•••
you knocked on the door three times, and he answered not long after.
“y/n? what are you doing here?”
“tommy thinks he left his sweater here and asked if i could drop by and pick it up on my way home.”
“oh yeah, one second.”
he disappeared for a moment before returning, holding your brother’s red hoodie. “here you go,” he said with a smile.
“thank you. sorry to bother you.”
“it’s no trouble. can i walk you home?”
you felt yourself heating up and smiled. “if you’d like.”
he nodded and grabbed his jacket. then you both started off toward the simons residence. you almost made it before it started raining.
it was light rain at first, so you carried on. however, it got heavier by the second, and pretty soon it was pouring on you two.
wilbur took off his jacket and held it above your heads. “we’re almost there, run!”
the two of you ran the rest of the way, only stopping once you got to your porch. you looked at each other for a moment, catching your breath. then you started laughing. you were both soaked and standing there like idiots, laughing at yourselves.
your laughter soon died down, and then you were just smiling at each other. he reached over to you and brushed a wet piece of hair behind your ear, getting it out of your face.
you weren’t stupid. you knew the look he was giving you was a lovestruck gaze, but you decided to play dumb.
“what?”
then finally it happened. after months of flirting and mutual pining, he closed the gap and kissed you. with his right hand on your face he crashed his lips to yours (a/n: that sounds violent but it’s not meant to be lol), pulling you closer with his left. you wrapped your arms around him, hands tangling in his hair.
passion mingled with desperation and you kissed long after you were breathless. you didn’t part until you heard a loud yell of disgust.
you instantly sprang apart with swollen lips and red faces.
“are you fucking kidding me? that’s my sister, man!” tommy yelled, glaring at wilbur.
he then looked to you. “and you, kissing my best mate?!”
you stood there shocked for a moment before coming to your senses.
“uhhh, I wasn’t kissing, were you kissing?” you said, turning to wilbur and praying to god he caught on to your obvious lie.
“no, i wasn’t kissing.” he shook his head.
“neither was i! see, no kissing here.”
“i’m not stupid,” said tommy, voice low and angry as opposed to the shock and disgust from before. “i saw everything.”
he then turned and walked away from the door, leaving you two alone again.
a moment of awkward silence passed. “i should probably… you know.” you said, pointing to the house.
“oh yeah, no, definitely.” he rubbed the back of his neck.
“and look, i’m sorry if i ruined your friendship with tommy. i know you guys are close, and i hope he forgives you.”
he gave you a sad smile. “same here, love.” he then kissed your cheek and took off into the rain once more.
you went inside and tried fixing things with tommy, who refused to speak to you. after sitting outside his bedroom door for nearly an hour, you finally gave up and headed back into your room. you opened discord.
[your username]: tommy’s ignoring me. i’ve just sat outside his room for an hour and he refuses to talk to me.
WilburSoot: i’ll give it a go.
he did not speak to wilbur. tommy left him on read every time.
•••
tommy avoided you entirely for two weeks. he left the room if you walked in, and he wouldn’t speak to you at the dinner table. your mother was curious what was going on between you two, but neither of you would say anything about it.
finally, you’d had enough.
you asked your mother to call tommy out of his room, since he wouldn’t answer if you were to try. she did, just wanting you two to speak again. once he arrived in the living room, you jumped him. you grabbed him around the middle and threw him on the couch, planting yourself on top of him so he couldn’t run away. your mum left the room.
“hey, you asshole, get off of me!”
“no, tommy! enough is enough! you’re not leaving until you hear me out!”
“no, i don’t want to talk to you!”
“too bad because i’m not moving until you hear what i have to say! i don’t want us to keep avoiding each other like this.”
he went silent and thought about it for a moment, an angry and skeptical look on his face. “…fine. get it over with.”
you took a deep breath.
“tommy, you’re my little brother, and i love you. i’ll always love you, even when you hate me. just know that i never meant to hurt you or make you angry. however… you can’t tell me how to live my life, or who i can be with. i want to be with wilbur. i can’t help it, tommy, i love him. you can be happy for me or not, that’s your choice. but what isn’t your choice, is who i love.”
by the end of your speech, your voice was shaking and your eyes were watery. you got off of tommy and helped him sit up.
his face softened. “you… you love him?”
your tears ran down your cheeks. you nodded. “i do.”
tommy sighed before pulling you into a hug. it was rare for him to show affection, especially to you, but after everything that happened between the two of you, he felt it was important.
“i love you, y/n. you’re my sister, i could never hate you. i’m happy for you. but just know, best mate or not, i’ll castrate him if he makes you sad.”
you laughed, wiping away your tears.
“i should… probably speak with wilbur, yeah?”
you nodded. tommy stood and went back to his room. you followed not long after, and even though you knew it was frowned upon, you stopped to listen at his door.
“tommy, thank god you’re speaking to me. listen, man, i–”
“do you love her, wilbur?”
“what?”
“my sister. do you love her?”
“i– yeah. yeah, i do.”
“good. listen, all i want is for y/n to be happy. meaning if you make her cry, i’ll murder you.”
wilbur chuckled on the other line, making you smile.
“you won’t have to worry about that. i promise you i’ll take care of her.”
“just don’t make my sister cry and don’t be gross in front of me, alright big man?”
“you’ve got yourself a deal, tommyinnit.”
you smiled again before heading off in the direction of your room.
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