#I THOUGHT IT BEING A SPOOF WAS A JOKE

[chocouniversa]

Guess what I found under my sink today

[sgt-celestial]

IM TOO GROOVY FOR THIS GO LOOK AT THE WAVES QUOTE IS FAKE? i really strongly suspected this but secretly i was hoping it was real.....but its from a spoof wikipedia page that calls peter the r slur at the beginning and tries to be funny by making fun of him in sort of tasteless ways. SAD!!!!!! well theres other sexy and fun peter tork quotes

[malcolmschmitz]

REVIEW: THE VICAR MAN

Okay, so, I finished @ameliahcrowley 's THE VICAR MAN. I promised to leave an Amazon review but Amazon won't let me. So in the spirit of our agreement, I'm leaving a review somewhere and figuring out Amazon later.

TLDR: The Vicar Man is good! I liked it! If you like funny historical fantasy you will probably like it!

So as you could probably guess from the title, The Vicar Man is a spoof of The Wicker Man, the classic folk horror movie. (It's mostly drawing from the Christopher Lee one, not the Nic Cage one, and thank goodness for that.) Dora's village worships a dark, eldritch god and sacrifices virgins to it for the good of the harvest. When a stranger comes to town- a nice young vicar who genuinely seems oblivious to the horrors at hand-

Dora can't just let him get thrown on the sacrificial pyre. She has to save this guy. And the easiest way to keep someone from being a virgin sacrifice is to make sure they're not a virgin anymore. Problem is, Dora's aro/ace, and moderately sex-repulsed. But a man's life's at stake. She sets off on a quest to seduce the Vicar, poking fun of many historical romance tropes along the way.

It might be more accurate to call this story an unromance novel than a fantasy novel- it follows all the conventions of a romance novel, down to the plot beats, but none of them quite wind up where you'd expect. This isn't a traditional love story- but it's not not a love story. This isn't a traditional horror story- but it's not not a horror story. If you're aro and/or ace, you like the idea of historical romance, but you're not here for the Love At First Sight Based Solely On Pantsfeelings? This book was made for you, specifically.

What it is is a comedy, and it's fast-paced and funny the whole way through. Dora's incredibly likeable- especially if you're a snarky, nerdy bluestocking, or if you've left a high-control religious group- and her inner monologue never fails to please. Norman, the titular vicar, is a sad, wet cat of a man, a poor little meow meow, adorable and kind and So Very Doomed. The relationship between the two of them - well, I shan't spoil things, but I thought it was delightful.

This book has one quality that didn't always gel with me- the language sits a bit wrong for a historical, even one that's set in the year "uh. well. there's probably a king? named George?". There's a fair bit of Tumblr dialect sprinkled through here- in particular there's a handful of jokes that revolve around 21st century feminist terms, sometimes deliberately using them for a jarring and inappropriate effect. And sometimes it hit right, but sometimes it didn't do it for me. I'm oversensitive to language, though- heck, I invented an entire goddess for one setting so I wouldn't have to use 'modern' trans language in a setting where it doesn't belong!- and it probably won't bug most people.

Overall, I really enjoyed the time I spent with THE VICAR MAN- I'd recommend it if you like funny historical fantasy, if you'd enjoy reading a sendup of Gothic romances and folk horror, or if you like the idea of an aro/ace unromance novel. I'd especially recommend it if you like The Misadventures of Sawbones and Its Menagerie- the narrator, Dora, has a very similar narrative voice. They share that 'outwardly quiet and polite, but with a constant snarky inner monologue' energy.

Strong recommend, and thanks to the author for the review copy!

[alluralater]

personally i think jesus was just some super interesting cool bisexual guy that hung out with sex workers, did fake magic, held down a carpentry job, and went from town to town fooling people with his “powers” to make that extra coin. and his disciples were like his on stage assistants/the guys who went around telling stories about him to really rev things up before a show. judas and jesus were definitely fucking. #jedus. anyways so like just think about it. i think they crucified him because they found out he was lying about it all and judas, that petty bitch was like “jesus you never let me eat it from the back anymore and you’re always hanging out with mary” let’s list out his powers + the likely ways he conned everyone

walking on water - long piece of wood just slightly below the surface. this man was a professional carpenter like hello. stage crew vibes

water into wine - are you fucking joking right now, this is so easy to do. you just drop some blood in there with sleight of hand and pretend it’s changing color. or you switch out the liquids, or you use a false sided glass

healing the lepers - he definitely paid people to pretend they were sick + used makeup (rudimentary ofc) and ‘healed’ them in front of an audience who were none the wiser. this and the rumor mill made people think he healed the daughter of jairus from such a distance even though it was just a coincidence.

multiplication of material - girl be so real. box underneath a table with a bottom tray which pushes things upward and creates the illusion of materials being multiplied because they’re suddenly here when they weren’t before.

controlling the weather - shut the fuck up. this is fully coincidental and i will not hear otherwise

curses - LMFAOO okay so they say he talked shit about this tree and it immediately dried up. yeah okay where’d you hear that from? one of his disciples?? yeah that’s what i thought. btw it says gullible on the ceiling

resurrection - girl don’t play with me right now. this man legit went into a cave for three days, and was like “reborn” gwyneth paltrow goop style and some mf took it literally. jesus is a dude that loves a good hyperbole and clearly his self care. to say he was in hell for twelve thousand years is an exaggeration, and it’s obviously a very good tale. sounds to me like he was drinking too much wine and he needed to dry out for a few days. or of course this was just part of the show. lazarus my fuckin ass

immortality - um. according to the script this man was successfully and very famously murdered for his crimes so… let’s move on

performing exorcisms/dispelling evil entities from hosts - okay let’s pretend for a second that this isn’t one of the easiest things on our list to spoof. the best way to turn an audience of faith-led people to your favor is to make yourself seem like you have been bestowed with a divine power to rid anyone of demonic force. this is a desperate move but you gotta get that bag. plant in the audience + lots of convulsing. or he literally just held someone that was known to have seizures and people decided he was getting rid of the wickedness lmfao

teleportation - the way i laughed so fucking hard. okay so we’re saying this guy ran around in lovely robes and appeared suddenly out of nowhere with the twelve disciples even though they would always be in a closed room? yeah that just sounds like some david blaine type shit and secret doors. or he just snuck into the room because there are TWELVE other men in thick clothing and it’s not that wild to think they just didn’t notice him enter. he’s a theater kid, let him have fun

in conclusion, jesus was the first prolific magician of color, and his tales of deception were very tempting to spread en masse because he was just this guy from nazareth that cut wood. an everyday dude with daddy issues. jesus was a man who wanted to impress people, to please people. maybe he thought if he was famous enough he could find his real father. perhaps he was searching for that approval and got carried away with his work. he was probably polyamorous, definitely a bottom. all it takes is a very long game of telephone and people think this man got killed for believing in god and spreading the word and having powers. in all actuality he was sentenced to death for running a con and amassing too many unknowing followers in the regions by being a gay lil magic man. as he rose to fame, he was prepared to leave judas in the dust. judas said fuck that and turned on jesus, showing undeniable proof of how jesus was fooling people. with this, jesus was crucified and subsequently became a legend + unwilling religious leader and martyr. or of course, his death was all just

part of the show

[decy-press]

i finally completed Virtue's Last Reward last night so now i can finally post these memes i made several months ago

alt text below:

the images show portraits of a bunch of zero escape characters, each one paired up with a dril tweet i thought matched up to them. the characters and their matching tweets are:

sigma: "the rumors are true.; i am indeed sending out valentine day kisses to all of my pretty lady followers. even the ones who have betrayed me" phi: "sad to see people betraying their friends for no reason. couldnt be me. i only betray my friends when it gives me an Advantage" K: "if i had a suit of armor i could easily beat the shit out of any man alive" quark: "DAD: i just heard on t he news that teens are taking the "kick my ass" challenge. please dont do this. ME: you have no power over me, old man" tenmyouji: "dont pay mind of me. i am just a hound dogs old ass..." luna: "can we stop the posts please guys. can we all cool it with the gags, riffs, spoofs, and epic shit. people are trying to do mental health" dio: "struting around in my stepson cowboy hat looking for an ass kicking" clover: "(carrying a huge polkadotted bindle, looking like a dumb ass, shoes completely untied) mother.. father... im leaving home to join the cops" alice: "to the longhorn steakhouse which refused to serve me: a bib most certainly counts as a shirt" zero jr: "the jduge orders me to take off my anonymous v mask & im wearing the joker makeup underneath it. everyone in the courtroom groans at my shit"

ace: "wghen other people do jokes, they get the big buzz feed office, allowed to kiss girls, etc, but when i do it im treated like a Crook. typical" snake: "daily reminder that i wear a suit and tie daily eeven though i have not set foot in public for over 16 years. #GoodBoy #Hansdome" santa: "look at all these pitiful toads shamelessly seeking validation, unlike me, seeking validation in a cool, disaffected sort of way" clover: "(in a really quiet, barely audible voice) hope your dick falls of bitch" junpei: "AH. ONCE AGAIN IM RAKED THRU THE COALS AND TORTURED TO DEATH FOR HAVING A NORMAL PERSONS OPINON. FUCK OFF" june: "GIRL: (after listening to me explain something i invented called Weed Theory for 20 mins) Wow thats pretty good. Did you invent that? ME: yes" seven: "i may not know "jack shit", but i know my friend "jack fists" and he would like to come knock the shit out of your teeth," lotus: "to me the most normal career path is to fail at show biz and resort to getting paid by defense contractors to make reddit psots or some shit" ninth man: "so long suckers! i rev up my motorcylce and create a huge cloud of smoke. when the cloud dissipates im lying completely dead on the pavement" zero: "if you are a hater you have 9 hours to confess to being a hater and apologise and pull your pants down so every one can see your dick"

[galavant-song-tournament]

Round 1

Propaganda:

it’s one of my favorites and constantly gets stuck in my head. the recap, the dancing, the brady bunch, the breaking of the fourth wall, it’s got everything

Galavant was always self-aware but this song lets us know the fourth wall is going down, hard.

A New Season really leans into the meta elements of the show and is hilarious. Also, it really fuels my belief that if galavant was ever renewed the necromancy jokes would be top teir

“Don’t know if you’ve noticed, but four pirates walked the plank last week. Middle of the ocean. Just walked right off”

Hilarious

Great intro to season 2

Richard and Galavant’s buddy-ship is the greatest thing ever

Gotta love a good fourth wall break, right? The dramatic swell at the end as they list a bunch of shows up til “Give into the miracle that no one thought we’d get!” is a favorite of mine. Also love how the music changes slightly for each group of characters as we check in on them (and the big change at the bridge for Isabella.)

Propaganda:

Serenade my best friend Serenade!!! It’s probably going to go in round 1 since it's up against A New Season (which is also amazing), but something about Serenade is endlessly funny to me. Galavant jumping into being completely over the top at the first opportunity. Richard doing his best. Roberta seeing this "wingman" song and her date catching himself on fire and deciding that she loves this man. The core message is "Maybe you won't die alone". A vote for Serenade is a vote for first dates gone wrong (in a funny way)!!

Mean little bestie rep

One of the most beautiful songs in the show, plus its classic brand of humour, can't go wrong with this one. Galavant just being like "you're annoying me and I'd like to get rid of you so I will utilize compulsory heterosexuality to my advantage and get you together with the only woman around" and it both does and very much doesn't work

Kiss the Girl spoof!!!

[aclosetfan]

I started this draft a long time ago based on a joke text post that goes around tumblr fandom spaces, but i can't find a link anymore. my mutuals love the greens as the secretly soft couple and i think the post fits the vibe perfectly, so here’s my spoof 😭😭

—————————

The kitchen clock read around 9 p.m., but their apartment was midnight silent. Butch sat in front of the tv, playing his video game. He kept the volume on low and muted his mic. As much as he wanted to cuss out his team, Buttercup was already asleep.

Townsville had been keeping Buttercup and her sisters busy for the last week. She was up early and in bed late, with no break in sight. He thought it was bullshit that she couldn't, at least, eat an actual dinner, but he was saving that argument for later when the dark circles under her eyes had receded slightly, and he didn't feel like such a shithead for not being able to do more to protect her.

Tonight, she had come home to him battered, bruised, and bone-tired. He had picked up her favorite take-out, and they had settled on the couch to watch a movie. They had made it about twenty minutes into the horrible B-rated horror flick when Buttercup's soft, tired snores reached his ears.

He had been only slightly disappointed. While this had been their first night together in a long time, he had been happy to see her sleeping, so he had scooped her up and placed her in bed with a kiss on the forehead.

That had been two hours ago.

He paused his game when Buttercup floated back into the living room. She wore their comforter like a cape and rubbed at her bleary eyes with a frown.

"Hey, babe," He smiled, opening his arms wide for her.

Buttercup didn't need further invitations. She plopped down on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Youse warm," She spoke into his chest.

"Bad or good warm?"

"Good."

He laughed, "Are you cold?"

"Mm."

"Come’ere then." He shuffled her around into a more comfortable position so he could still play his game with her wrapped around him. "Comfortable?"

"Mhm." She nodded, her head resting on his shoulder. "Couldn't sleep without you."

"Well, sleep now, I ain't goin' anywhere."

"Don't wanna," she said through a yawn, nuzzling into his chest. "Miss you."

Butch's heart skipped a beat as if they were still teenagers and he was still hiding his miserable crush on her.

He didn't say anything back. He didn't have the words, but he held her close to him, rubbing small circles into her back and peppering kisses to the crown of her head. Her breath pleasantly tickled his neck as she fell back asleep.

He enjoyed her dead weight and marveled, not for the first time, over the fact that this was his life now—safe with Buttercup. He could act like himself, here, with her, not as some demonic entity's tool.

And it was all thanks to her.

And he was such an idiot for fighting it for so long.

His heart skipped another beat, and he held her even closer.

"You deserve an award, putting up with me." He whispered, thinking she was asleep.

"You’re m’award." She whispered back.

——————————————————————

(BONUS)

The main overhead light in their bedroom flicked on as the door banged open.

"Bubbles!" Boomer jumped onto the bed. "Bubbles! I made a lil' midnight snackieee. Do you want some?"

Bubbles' eyes snapped open with the fury of a thousand suns. Boomer stood above her, obnoxiously chewing whatever unholy midnight concoction he had slaved over. The kitchen was likely a mess.

"It’s two in the morning," She squeaked, squinting against the overhead light, "and you're getting crumbs all over me!"

"Yeah! I was craving something crunchy!" Boomer beamed, but his mouth was full of food, so his stupid explanation was garbled and only pissed her off further.

She wiped spittle crumbs off her face and flopped over on her side. "No, I'm tired. Go back to playing your video games."

"Ugh!" Boomer groaned, flopping down on the bed, "It got boringgg when Butch logged off. Let's do something else!"

"Sleep."

"That's boring too," Boomer pouted, tugging her shoulder until she faced him again. "Hey, by the way, why didn’t you say I love you when you went to bed? I was like hey babe, goodnight! Love you! And you were like, night, like what’s with that, huh? You love me, right?"

Guilt pierced her heart for a second, but then she remembered it was two in the morning. "I love you," she said.

Boomer regarded her momentarily, then addressed her dryly, "Well, it doesn’t sound sincere now!"

"Boomer." She seethed. "What time is it?"

He squinted at the alarm clock, "About two!"

"And how long have I been asleep?"

"Four hours and thirteen minutes!"

"I need more than four hours and thirteen minutes! We've been over this. I'm so tired."

Boomer frowned, putting his snack to the side. "I'm doing it again, aren't I? I'm sorry. It's just that I can't sleep, and I miss you, Bubs, that's all."

This time, the guilt stayed. She knew about his nightmares, after all.

Bubbles sat up to cup his face with her hand. She kissed his cheek and said, "Oh, Boomer, it's okay, silly. I'm sorry. It's just been a long week. I'll make a midnight snack with you tomorrow."

Another bright smile broke out across his face, and he wrapped her up in a big hug before laying her back on the bed.

"Bubbie," He announced, "you deserve an award for putting up with me!"

"I really do." Bubbles smiled serenely, pulling the covers up over her head, "You’re a real dumbass sometimes. Now, go away."

[lurkinglurkerwholurks]

Mother Bruce and His Baby Birds

First posted: April 2, 2018

Focuses on: Bruce Wayne et al

Favorite bookmark: "if only dc wasn't a coward"

Second favorite bookmark: "yooo i felt god in this chili's tonight"

Tier: As of queue date, #6 in hits and kudos, #5 in comments, #7 in bookmarks and subscriptions

This is my "behind the scenes" series where I indulge myself horribly by annotating my fics.

I haven't figured out the best way to cover multi-chapter fics, especially behemoths like Nature and Nurture or The Return, so this is a test. I'll start with chapter one and reblog with additions for each chapter, I think. If there's a better way, please send suggestions.

Link to the fic itself above. Thoughts below the cut.

Chapter One

My very first fic ever. I got obsessed with reading fic for a few months (thanks to @audreycritter's Cor Et Cerebrum and @unpretty's Sorrowful and Immaculate Hearts, and finally needed a little bit of output to balance out the input. It wasn't really planned, which is why my name is what it is. I'd made the lurker account to do just that and nothing more. Which feels a little silly now, five years and almost 100 fics later. 😬

The title comes from the Ryan Higgins picture book, because titles are harrrrrrd.

I think this is my only fic with chapter names, other than The Return.

He knew how it felt--that teeth-rattling, rib-crushing, pulse-racing sensation--and he knew how to push through it.

You see? You see how new I was at this? I hadn't even looked up the em-dash shortcut yet.

"And I don’t care if Arthur Pennypacker says gelato contains the required daily serving of calcium. Alfred will not let you survive on gelato alone.”

I am going to try very hard to be proud of this, my little baby fic, and not critical, but it's going to be very difficult when I clearly had to pluck a name out of thin air and ended up with Arthur Pennypacker being discussed in the same scene where Alfred Pennyworth exists. Yeesh.

"Art’s the fathead that stole Eddie’s gym shorts and ran them up the Academy flagpole.”

I wrote a joke poem about this kind of scenario for school once and it got published as part of a contest. Reduce reuse recycle.

The grin was still there, a bright smile full of pleasantly crooked teeth that leaned into each other like birds in a winter wind, but the corner of Jason’s mouth twisted hesitantly.

If I were doing this again, I'd make Jason a little less golly gee mister in tone, but at least he's precious.

Jason had always been gifted at picking up the scent of unease. Dick, Bruce’s outgoing ward, could read emotions. Jason could read tells.

Now that's clever, if I do say so myself. Good job, Amateur Me.

Jason dropped his spoon back in the empty gelato cup and ran his fingers over the stitching of the baseball on the table.

I reference that ball later in another fic and for the life of me right now I can't remember which one. Ah well. Put a pin in this. You'll see it again.

I thought I was gonna miss it for sure! And then after, Raul Huezo right there in front’a me! Just like, pshew! Did’ja see Bruce?

Raul Huezo was a spoof on a real-life baseball player... and I no longer remember who. Pity.

For a moment, all was still. Bruce had stopped breathing entirely, and it felt like Jason had as well. Bruce gripped Jason tightly, struggling to keep the preteen from falling out of his precarious half-perch on Bruce’s lap and onto the floor. But Jason was clutching Bruce just as tightly, gangly arms wrapped around Bruce’s neck and face pressed into Bruce’s chest. Tentatively, Bruce lowered his face to Jason’s hair and breathed in the smell of shampoo, sweat, and ballfield.

dadhugdadhugdadhugdadhug

Hitting post on this very first chapter was terrifying but everyone was awfully nice. And it's so fun to look back and realize @cdelphiki was my very first commenter ever. Like hey! I know that name!

[yellowhollyhock]

raph vs a volcano day 20

The 1987 episode plot:

Donatello's health scanner predicts Raphael has only 24 hours to live. Raphael goes around doing good deeds and taking ridiculous risks because he's gonna die anyway. Meanwhile Donatello figures out his machine didn't work right and means to tell Raphael, but you see he is distracted doing good deeds and taking ridiculous risks. It culminates with Raph inside an active volcano (trying to stop it from erupting? bro??) and his brothers have to come rescue him.

I love this episode. For so many reasons.

1) What an interesting way to give Raph his role while keeping him in character within the new role they gave him for this show. Because Mirage Raph is the guy who always wants to help without pausing to think about whether they can. He's known for sometimes being impulsive and always being protective. And not just of his fellow turtles! He sees someone in trouble he wants to help. But usually in Mirage that's expressed with violence. So for the show they made the "crazy one" express the same traits through sarcasm instead and he became the witty one, and I love how future Raphs are both. And I especially love when 1987 Raphael himself is both

2) This is such a classic plot. It's like... the tribbles spoof/tribute or 'character gets kidnapped but acts so annoying they get released.' You know the kinds of plots I mean right? Our style of storytelling has changed (it's always changing) but tv shows in late 80s early 90s especially had these. You could pretty much guess the plot from the title because you know the characters and you know the story. The exciting reveal is mostly the jokes. There are words for what I'm saying but I haven't had an english class in a few years, so take this ramble and trust me. It's a beautiful example of whatever this is. And!

---2a, It doesn't have the classic resolution that 'character thought they had one day to live due to a misunderstanding' would have on a kids show. There isn't a 'moral' about seizing the moment and using your time wisely. There also isn't a moral about communication, so instead of the miscommunication being annoying like it would in a preachy episode, it's gloriously hilarious to watch

3) Speaking of that, the obligatory 'he tried to ask' scene is Raphael watching Michelangelo cry on Donatello's shoulder because "I'll miss him so much" "I'm sorry there's nothing I can do for him" it's the oven. The oven is broken. Michelangelo is sobbing in Donatello's arms like his world is ending because they're going to have to get a new oven because this one's beyond fixing. And Raphael fully believes that Michelangelo is begging Donatello to fix him, when this version of Donatello is so very none medic. Like I don't even know how to describe why and how much I love this scene. I think I killed english

4) The scene of Raphael in the volcano. I just. He's so funny. This episode really captures what I love about the whole show, which is that I am absolutely buying into it and feeling deeply about it, and simultaneously enjoying it ironically. Does that make sense? When you can put your whole heart into unironic enjoyment but your brain at the same time gets it's 'make fun of this' treat. So both types of fun at once.

---4a it's not trying to fix the plot holes it's enjoying that in this format you don't have to. I feel like this is severely under utilized in modern cinema. make things not make sense on purpose for fun. don't explain about where they are, how they carried that object with them, why there were not other consequences for certain actions. The fun thing about stories is they don't have to be realistic unless you want them to

so for today I had intended to write a Rise version of this episode. I think it would work well for them. Plus, Raph and Donnie bonding. However. That is going in drafts and will be coming. later (march for raph is my opportunity to collect drafts for the rise turtles apparently.) I'm actually still debating if Donnie would make a health-o-meter or if something goes down in witch down, but either way, ❤️💜

[duhragonball]

Neon Genesis Evangelion 02

I’m honestly not sure if I knew beforehand about the penguin.  This is one of those “wacky” anime tropes where it’s like “Uh-oh, we have a kooky thing in our show!  Wokka wokka!” and I’m pretty sure it’s in so many different titles that I probably heard about the penguin and got it mixed up with some other show’s wacky animal.  Anyway, let the record show that there is a penguin in this anime.

So last time Shinji Ikari got voluntipulated to pilot Eva Unit 01 in battle against an “angel”, a powerful monster that occasionally shows up in this world.  All we really know so far is that the angels are hostile and only the Eva machines can stop them, if they have a compatible pilot to operate them.  I guess the NERV Agency built the Eva machines, and recruited Rei Ayanami to pilot one of them, but she’s been hospitalized, so the NERV director, Gendo Ikari, has brought in his son, Shinji, to pilot another Eva unit in her place.

And he reluctantly agrees, despite having no training or prior experience.  Hell, it’s not even clear he had any idea what he was getting into today.  Anyway, he seems to have a gift for controlling his Eva, but the angel still overpowers him and starts kicking his ass.  One of its powers is some sort of energy piledriver thing it uses to batter the head of Eva-01. Shinji can feel the damage, even though his own body isn’t physically harmed.

In the NERV command center, everyone’s freaking out because this clearly isn’t working, but there’s nothing they can do about it.  Well, everyone except Shinji’s dad, Gendo.  He doesn’t seem to care much one way or the other.

Then we flash forward to after the battle, when Shinji wakes up in bed.  The middle of the episode just moves on, and for a while it’s unclear what the hell happened. 

A bunch of big shots have a meeting in a darkened room, talking in circles about how expensive it is to fight the angels and all the projects they want Gendo Ikari to work on.  I feel like I’ve seen this a hundred times.  Pop Team Epic spoofed a scene like this, and this whole show reminds me of the not-funny parts of the Excel Saga manga.  All these vague references to things the audience couldn’t possibly know about, and flashbacks to lines delivered earlier in the same episode.  I don’t know if Evangelion was the inspiration for a lot of this stuff, or if it was just using tropes that were already familiar in 1995.  Certainly the giant robots vs. giant monster thing is nothing new. 

Anyway, nothing really gets settled in this scene.  The authorities want Dr. Ikari to handle this crisis, and from what I can tell he already is. He’s a callous prick about it, but none of these guys seem to care about his attitude. They briefly ask why it’s so hard to find compatible pilots for these Eva Units, but we never get a clear answer. And Gendo has no reaction to their posturing, so this scene really doesn’t advance his character at all, unless the point is to show that he’s just as indifferent towards his superiors as he is to his subordinates.

At some point Shinji is released from the hospital, and Misato sets him up to live in this city.  He wasn’t injured from the battle, but he was shaken up pretty badly.  On their way, they briefly run into Gendo, who just stares at Shinji, who looks away in frustration until the elevator door closes.  Soon enough, Misato learns that Shinji won’t be living with Gendo while he’s here.  That doesn’t seem to bother either of the Ikaris. 

So Misato arranges to have Shinji live with her, since she doesn’t like the idea of him being in a place by himself.  She tells Ritsuko about this, and jokes that she isn’t planning to seduce the kid, and Ritsuko is upset at the very thought of it.  

Misato was only kidding, but yeah, that’s kind of a messed up thing to kid about.  It’s not even a case of the joke aging poorly, because Ritsuko takes offense in the very next line of dialogue.

On the way to her place, Misato finally explains to Shinji what this place is: Tokyo-3, a fortified city designed to repel Angel attacks.  I think I can make an educated guess about what happened to Tokyo and Tokyo-2. What I don’t understand is what good the city does.  It didn’t protect anything, and it was up to Shinji to defend it.  Maybe it’s just easier to clean up and repair than a regular city.

Anyway, they get to the apartment and there’s empty beer cans and trash everywhere.  Shinji is uncomfortable being here, he’s uncomfortable eating instant meals with Misato, and when he doesn’t immediately relax like she wants, she brow-beats him over it. 

I guess that’s the point of all this.  Misato’s the only person in this show so far who even tries to treat Shinji like a person, and she’s frustrated that he isn’t more like the kind of person she’d like him to be. 

I mean, the additional frustration of living with an adult woman must be stressful as well, and the penguin probably doesn’t help matters. 

Okay, so this is kind of a thing.  At night, Shinji lies in his bedroom listening to his mixtape or whatever, and it switches from track 25 to 26.  I was reading a Twitter thread that mentioned this, and how he only listens to those two tracks over and over, so I think that becomes important later.  Anyway.

At last, we finally flash back to the battle, and learn how Shinji survived.  Somehow, his Eva went berserk and began fighting back all on its own.  Or maybe Shinji was controlling it unconsciously or whatever.  The Angel is quickly overwhelmed, and it tries to self-destruct, but the Eva survives unharmed. 

The NERV crew mention something about the Eva’s “true form”, which I guess explains whatever this thing is that we see beneath it’s helmet.  Shinji gets a look at it through his viewscreen and they stare at each other for a while before he blacks out from terror.

Before turning in for the night Misato stops by to tell him what she feels she should have told him earlier: that he did a good thing by saving Tokyo-3 from the Angel. 

I don’t know, it didn’t quite hit me until now, but yeah, it’s kind of fucked up that no one bothers to thank him until well after the crisis has passed.  I mean, if Tokyo-3, the NERV Agency, and all the rest are so crucial to the future of humanity, then you’d think there’d be more gratitude towards Shinji.  I think part of the disconnect here is that the Angel problem is a lot bigger than this one attack, and the characters are too busy worrying about the big picture to appreciate a single act of heroism, no matter how important it might be. 

Anyway, that’s it for now.  Join us next time when... actually I have no idea.  I watch the next episode preview, but I couldn’t make much sense of it. I’ll find out soon enough.

[mayakern]

now i’m curious what were ur fav MP goofs !!! :0

ok i have a 10 image limit and some of these are multi-image jokes so i’ll try to distill these as best i can. also these jokes are all from i think chapter 4 and later, where i really flourished my sense of humor more

1. marina’s high school crush/bff sharkwanda being a highly contentious contestant on a spoof of top model

this is specifically a spoof of the early seasons, which usually had an assessment within the first 2 or 3 episodes, including a weigh in. as much as i loved trashy tv, i always hated these moments so i thought it would be funny to have a literal shark and to have her be weighed against mostly average-sized humanoids because it would be ridiculous for anyone to expect a healthy shark to weigh the same amount as a human.

there were a couple other layers to this: george idolizing her as a strong, independent woman. george’s brother freaking out because sharkwanda just ate a man on camera and no one’s overly bothered by this. george chastising him for not realizing it was obviously fake/over dramatized for the ratings (and not examining that then this moment of “self empowerment” would also be fake). and then also i named her after a fish named wanda. except she’s a shark named wanda. she’s also the most beautiful and popular girl in the world and she wins her season and becomes a very successful model.

2. the tinsley family thanksgiving outfits. actually their themed outfits in general. i think shit like this is super cute and funny. i also just enjoy writing siblings who rib each other lovingly.

also the part of this where george’s mom has three eyes (she’s psychic) and her dad has no eyes, so her brother has two eyes and for all intents and purposes looks human, but he is a full blooded monster. early on i had some ideas for an off shoot chapter about eli and his struggles with his identity (being a monster but not looking like one and not feeling at home in either community), but it got scrapped for time and also because it felt like too close a parallel to mixed race people who pass as white and that’s not my story to tell.

3. sharkwanda’s cover (up) girl ad campaign during the superb owl half time show. some of this stuff was a bit on the nose, but there’s a line about sharkwanda finally having makeup that doesn’t melt off her face like hot cheese that i still like

4. this multi-strip joke where franny’s dad pulls a turkey out of a hat. just read it there’s nothing to explain lol

5. basically every part of the magic shop scene, but especially the part where percy meets franny’s dad for the first time during a very tense situation and franny’s dad is wearing a skeleton (this is a reference to ranma 1/2). and then also percy sits and there’s a whoopee cushion. it’s incredibly awkward and not exactly haha funny, but it simultaneously cuts and adds to the tension in a way that is very monsterpop.

6. human!franny getting ben a dog toy as his secret santa gift (he doesn’t own a dog) and then dropping it and then it making a horrific, shrill squeak when it bounces

7. the whole situation with chadler, his horrible christmas outfit, the marshmallow gun, and him taking sexy santa ben as prisoner.

8. ben, killed by glitter, soon to be avenged by his crush comrade (or not)

9. george being gifted a framed painting of a photo of herself, asleep during class, which she later carries into an actual museum and gets in trouble for because a guard thinks she stole a piece of art

10. the brotebook

this has been very long but i hope u enjoyed it

[3rddimension]

Another angle of why S and C could be keeping things private that I haven't seen discussed as much is the possible misogynistic backlash to C's comedy chops. If C hadn't had the year they just had in 2023 - massive director flex with the funeral roast; repeat bits in TNTL that even other cast members are referencing; so much fan love for appearances on games/lives; fans acknowledging the work S & C individually did to keep Smosh alive pre-Anthony return - then I could see S and C keeping it under wraps longer.

WHY I SAY THAT - there used to be a long running bit (they both participated in) about S ghost-writing C's tweets. Or C being "lady S" (roast joke). That they look alike, or are funnier versions of each other. Heck - C Freakin' Miller is a spoof of C by S. While I think the jokes from the Smosh team are hilarious and good-natured - I've seen stuff in the comments about how C isn't funny without S. Or S is the funniest version of C.

After the year that C just had, I think their work speaks for itself. It always has. But it will ALWAYS be harder for a woman/NB person to prove they're funny in the world of comedy. Plus S is hysterical, and a genius at his craft, plain and simple. The "S is Smosh operating at 99%" joke is in many ways true. But I feel like C is finally starting to get the credit they long deserve, entirely separate from S. That's got to be so hard to cheer S on while also wanting your own separate credit in the eyes of fans.

I would hate them going public and there being comments like - "oh THAT'S why C has been so funny." I hope folks have grown past that. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this!

Oh yeah it's definitely one of the factor that I was thinking as well. Since it's pretty much happened with Saige and Damien relationship way back in the day.

I also think that Smosh got so much room for their cast and crew to be able to learn and grow. You can see people like Kimmy and Erin growing into producer role in real time and ofc Courtney who went into full fledged producer/director role. Ian's pretty much nailed the mindset of his company.

[bi4pan-polls]

I would like to present, for your consideration, Stephanie Lauter and Peter Spankoffski from Hatchetfield.

Steph has been confirmed to be canonically pan by her actress, Pete has huge bi vibes (and is sorta implied to be transmasc?)

Hatchetfield is a horror anthology series. So far there are three musicals and eight episodes of a webshow, and everything but the most recent musical is currently available for free on YouTube. Steph and Pete have two major appearances.

The first is in the web episode Abstinence Camp, a Friday the 13th spoof. At the start of the episode, they're both forced to attend a Christian summer camp, an idea that they hate bond over. They've got a bit of banter and hit it off well. Highlights include Steph giving him contraband chocolate bars when the counselors don't care about his lowering blood sugar, Pete agreeing she got the short end of the stick in her situation, and the both of them being generally pretty snarky together.

There's a scene where Steph decides to test the camp's rules (and get some privacy) by showering in the boys' washroom. Pete is the only one there, and his first instinct is to do the respectful thing and let her be in there alone, only staying to finish cleaning when she insists it's okay if he's in there. (They have more banter, she finds out just how hot he is when you actually get a good look at him. He's described as jacked in this scene, but due to a recast, this is most certainly retconned. Still a cute moment between them). It culminates in them deciding to test the ghost story running around the camp that doing anything remotely sexy will get you killed by a spirit living in the woods, but are caught before anything can happen. Between getting into trouble and the audience knowing that there have already been other deaths, it's for the best that Steph plans to make an escape. What's sweet, though, is that she makes a point to get Pete to come too.

Throughout the whole climax of the story they both actively try to protect each other. Pete yells at the Axe-Man to leave Steph alone, she shields him from harm when he accidentally breaks his leg. By the end of the story they're both still alive, and are actively aware they're the only ones who know just how fucked up the camp is. It's implied they keep protecting each other that whole summer.

(If there are any Hatchetfans reading this and you haven't seen NPMD yet, here is your spoiler warning.)

Their most recent appearance is in the newest Musical, Nerdy Prudes Must Die. NPMD is also a slasher spoof, but with a twist: the nerds are in danger and the rebellios and popular "bad kids" are on the killer's good side.

The whole show happens because in this timeline, Steph and Pete meet when she asks to cheat off of his bio test.

Two things to note about that. 1. Despite Steph being the most popular girl and Pete being one of the most unpopular kids in all of Hatchetfield High, she already knows his name. 2. It does not take much convincing for him to agree. They get caught, and are sent to detention. Pete freaks out, not because he got in trouble, but because now he's in with a popular girl (the mayor's daughter, no less) and it's going to get him unwanted attention from the kids that pick on him. They have more banter, like in AC, to the point Pete doesn't know how well it's going until Steph says that he's funny and admits she likes funny guys. This sticks with Pete enough he decides to wear nicer clothes and crack jokes more often, even when just with his friends. They even ask if he's trying to impress someone.

Steph calls him. From a payphone.

For someone who never gave Pete a second thought before, she sure did already know is name AND number. Are we sure you didn't already have an eye on him, Steph?

She asks him to give a proper study session, and he agrees, in part due to his friends telling him that sparks were flying. He ends up singing a whole song about wondering if he's really cool enough to hang out with her.

Pete ends up getting beat up by his biggest bully (Max Jagerman) on the way, and when Steph finds out, she gets VERY righteous. She says she's not going to let Pete put up with bullying anymore and offers to step in (even though Pete doesn't think it will do much). Before they really have a chance to do anything, another student (Grace Chasity) offers up her own revenge plan that inadvertently ends up killing Max. Max ends up coming back as a ghost with a grudge against nerds, since everyone that was there when he died (besides Steph) was an unpopular nerd.

They share a lot of banter up until the first death, when things become more serious by necessity. Still, they both do a pretty bad job of covering up their crushes, and end up having a duet arguing over who has the bigger crush and why a relationship would never work between them the way things are right now (note: Pete says he felt almost seduced by her, Steph admits she's into smart guys and knows he's an intellectual type).

As the show goes on, Steph is actively protecting him like in AC, encouraging him to stay behind her in case something happens.

Steph, Pete, and Grace end up being the last three survivors of the main cast, and strike a deal with beings called The Lords in Black. The Lords will take Max to the afterlife for good if one of the teens gives up what they cherish most. Pete and Steph have a crisis, because now they have to admit to each other that okay maybe they are sorta in love, and have to decide who will die for the other. Pete insists that he do something worthwhile for once and save everybody by being the sacrifice. And Steph, despite her heartbreak, agrees.

LUCKILY Grace prevents that by saving the day in the funniest way possible. Too amazing to spoil (and also because I've barely gone into her subplot this whole time). But Steph and Pete make it out together. And they're grateful for it. And they even get to go to homecoming together.

By then end, they've decided they can make it work and have a song about being able to bring out the best in each other. (Special shoutout to the lyrics "I’m the best of you / And you’re the best of me / And together we are free / To run around" and "Its like you knew me / Before you knew me / Its like you saw me / Before you saw me")

(Hatchetfans, spoilers end here)

In conclusion, stan Lautski

(sorry for putting a whole essay in your inbox, op)

Was given permission to post this*

They seem. So hecking cool honesty love this for them I will also encourage other people to submit them

Propaganda for Stephanie Lauter and Peter Spankoffski from Hatchetfield.

[popculturebuffet]

Pride Month Triple Feature: Sam and Max Freelance Police: That Darn Gator! (Commission for WeirdKev27)

Welcome back to my three part sadly beleated pride-palooza! After looking at how it's okay for gonzo to wear a dress, it's time to look at the wholesome story of two gay dads raising an alligator son.. and then trying to flush him back down the toilet when he gets too big, take him to therapy and get him to the sunny wilds of florida. Look it's easy to see why, while not a confirmed couple, it's easy to read sam and max as one. There's an ENTIRE bit in the fourth chapter of the first telltale game dedicated to them benig each other's perfect match, and it's clear if their not together it's just because i'ts a rough subject to broach. Or because in the early 2000's "THEM BEING GAY IS FUNNY RIGHT" instead of actually exploring the relatoinship. What makes That Darn Gator Work is while the two do adopt John, a tiny alligator they find in a toilet, as their surrogate son.. the fact it's two men raising a child, or a pet alligator in this case.. isn't played for laughs. The two are treated like John's parents, but that's not really where the humor comes from and it's honestly heartwarming. Most setups would play this as a joke or have one be the clear masculine and feminine parent, like Spongebob Did with Rock a bye beluvle. That one only really works as well as it does because Spongebob and Patrick are so childlike they just ASSUME a family needs a mom and a dad and then get too into the rolls. The joke here is just spoofing the hell out of "main character gets a pet but has to get rid of it for some reason", and gets a ton of jokes out of it, from their heartwarming montage with john, to John only eating food off Max's hand (and max never thinking to wear gloves being a nice unspoken joke), and the usual madcap What really makes it work is the punchline: as outlined in a flash foward at the start.. the issue is simply that john.. is a wild alligator and unlike our heroes isn't anthromprohic. Not only is there another subtle bit of luancy I didn't catch, that these two furries are raising a very realisticly rendered gator, but that's just the simple issue: he's too big, he's eaten everything and the thearapist used as a wraparound, in what's kev's faviorite gag, simply shrieks in horror and tells them to get it out of their office. My faviorite gag is when they tearfully decide to send him home.. and while I predicted the sewer as where their thoughts would go, because after 5 teeltale episodes and a godo chunk of the series I know how these two weirdos work... I DIDN'T expect the image you see in the header: the two just stuffing poor john into the toilet, his head jammed in there, nor the two tearfully waving goodbye till Darla explains to her two idiot roomates/parents that alligators come from florida. One trip to florida later and they let john be with his own kind in a giant pile. It's a ludicrous, wonderful little episode worth checking out and like all of freelance police, it's on youtube. Thanks for reading.

[midnightcowboy1969]

Zoolander is very odd about race, because you got Derek covered in soot scaring his father in the mines. It's not minstrelsy but it is blackface in the sorta way I've seen fellow white people excuse all the time because its not directly blackface/minstrelsy they're depicting something else. Then later in the movie you have Derek and Hansel transform into people of color and they're portrayed by two men of color. The joke is twofold. You got Derek being very good at makeup, but you also got a subversion of expectations. You thought they were going to do minstrelsy but rest easy they're not. But then you have Hansel and Derek's voices coming out of these men's mouths. So in an abstract sense it's blackface (I saw some comments about how its not racist because there's no actual blackface going on). Then after that you have Hansel and Derek back but they're covered in brown make-up except for their faces. So no blackface. Now, they have to figure out how a computer works but they're too bimbo-brained to know how to log on which leads into a 2001 A Space Odyssey spoof in which they start acting like apes. The whiplash from this abstract sense of blackface into something that is just meant as a spoof but also involves apes it makes one pause, no? It all makes one pause. I'd just really like to read some articles on this because I do not know what to feel other than discomfort. I enjoyed the movie and I like Derek being a bimbo, but it's all very ... idk, I can't say.

Tldr; anyone have any articles on Zoolander (2001) and race?

[themattress]

Dragon Ball Retcons: The Lucky Streak

When the late, great Akira Toriyama first began work on Dragon Ball, it was a gag-flavored spoof on the legend of the classic Japanese novel Journey to the West. It was only toward the end of that initial story arc that Toriyama began to add an element of seriousness with Goku's transformation into an Oozaru. After this event, Oolong asks "So is Goku some kind of alien or something?", setting the stage for perhaps the luckiest streak of retcons from a writer who is clearly just making everything up as he goes along ever. By which I mean, retcons that were clearly never a pre-planned intention and yet somehow fit in so seamlessly that you could swear otherwise. Obviously, Toriyama eventually decided to retcon that Goku was, in fact, an alien. But with that throwaway line from Oolong, it now feels long foreshadowed!

The other examples:

- The Red Ribbon Army was the first serious villainous force that Goku faced, being full of dangerous high-tech gadgetry and robotics. However, the joke twist ended up being that its leader, Commander Red, was just some rich idiot with a Napoleon complex who wanted to use the Dragon Balls to wish himself taller and then go on to conquer the world, as opposed to simply using the Dragon Balls to wish for world domination. At the time, all of those technological threats were just a means to an end, a build-up to a punchline, and nothing more. But later, Toriyama decided that it was a super genius named Dr. Gero who was behind all of that stuff, and since Goku brought it all down he'd have more reason than anyone else in the Red Ribbon Army to hate him, causing him to seek vengeance through the creation of the Androids and Cell. And it totally tracks! The reason an organization led by a joke villain still felt so serious as a threat was because its weaponry was engineered by a serious villain, and that villain returning to ultimately cost Goku his life via a creation that blends the cells of Goku, his friends and his foes feels like a natural full circle accumulation for the story.

- Mercenary Tao actually managed to defeat Goku with a technique called the Dodonpa. At the time, it was just a cool and unexpected way to finish a fight and cement Tao as a formidable opponent. But later, Toriyama decided to bring in the Crane Hermit school of martial arts which lends its teachings to the mercenary lifestyle, which is how we get Tienshinhan. Now it looks like Tao was deliberate foreshadowing of this new three-eyed foe turned mainstay ally of Goku's even though Toriyama hadn't thought him up back then.

- Piccolo and Kami were both green with pointy ears and antennas, looking more like aliens than demon and deity respectively. And per Toriyama's own admission, he hadn't planned them as aliens until it came time for them to face off in the 23rd Budokai. That's when he decided they were actually aliens and decided to foreshadow it with a talk between them spoken entirely in an unknown language, which turned out to be the native language of the Namekians - something that would become a pivotal plot point during the Freeza Saga.

- The Saiyans (Raditz, Nappa and Vegeta) all wore a distinct spiked battle armor, had energy scouters over their eyes, and traveled in spherical space pods. Later, Toriyama retconned it so that these motifs were all part of Freeza's empire and not the Saiyans. This would not have felt natural....had Toriyama not also made the pivotal change in plans of leaving Vegeta alive at the end of his battle with Goku on Earth. Because the Saiyans' leader is still in the story, we get to clearly see his interactions and dynamics with Freeza and his empire, totally selling us the notion that this was how it always was; that he and his comrades were always serving in that empire while also scheming to overthrow it someday. It made perfect sense.

- Similarly, the remark Raditz gave about the Saiyans' home planet being destroyed by a comet was later retconned into being a lie by Freeza, who actually destroyed the planet. Once again this ended up feeling perfectly natural, because so much of Freeza's character via the still living Vegeta was the tight grip he preferred to have on the Saiyans lest they become a threat to him. So it tracks that he would decide to reduce the number of Saiyans in existence to make this easier and hopefully make a Super Saiyan arising less likely.

- Vegeta in general was pure happenstance somehow producing one of the best developed characters in the series. Instead of the throwaway arc villain he was created to be, he survived to be a great secondary villain turned ally through necessity in the Freeza Saga, where he met his tear-jerking demise....except even that wasn't to last despite originally being the intention, as his popularity caused Toriyama to resurrect him after Goku had become a Super Saiyan, creating the perfect segue into him shifting into more of a rival whose primary objective was to surpass Goku in strength. Selfish, but not villainous. And it just kept going from there, to the point where in the chapter where the decision to spare Vegeta in-universe and out of it was made, Krillin's vocal disbelief of the notion Vegeta will ever turn over a new leaf like Piccolo ends up feeling like foreshadowing that he would.

- There's also the whole Super Saiyan concept and how it seamlessly plays into the way Goku has always come back stronger after every defeat. The way his transformation happens is also steeped in dramatic irony that makes sense for the story: it isn't his strength or love for fighting that does it, but his Earth-bred compassion for his human friend Krillin.

- On that note, Gohan's hidden power. This was set up early into Gohan's time as a character, but it wasn't supposed to be specifically tied to anything. But in the Android Saga, Gohan ends up as the one most likely to fully transcend the level of Super Saiyan due to that hidden power of his. It now feels like this was always the logical end route for that plot thread even when Toriyama hadn't even thought up regular Super Saiyans yet when he started it.

- Last but not least, the Android Saga in general. This whole story was Toriyama and his editors winging it from beginning to end, and the finished product is something that flows so smoothly you'd swear it was pre-planned. Of course Androids 19 and 20 weren't the actual Androids that Trunks warned about! Of course Androids 17 and 18 were ultimately going to be redeemed villains! Of course Cell was designed to transform through the absorption of 17 and 18! Of course past elements like Dende, the Budokai tournament and Bulma being a tech genius were going to be incredibly important! Of course the story would end with the flaws Cell exploited in others being exploited in him, Gohan's power to be as much of a hindrance as a help, Goku sacrificing his life, Cell coming back even more powerful, Vegeta finally displaying actual love and humility and self-reflection, and Gohan defeating Cell by blasting him with the most powerful Kamehameha ever...one-handed! It all feels so organic both in itself and in context to the wider series! Yet Toriyama totally stumbled his way into it.

It really was impressive. Sadly, all good things must come to an end, and Toriyama never really captured that same magic afterward. Most of the retcons made in the Buu Saga, all of Dragon Ball Super, and the canonically licensed video games just feel so much more obvious and clunky. Some of them still feel sensible - Hercule's development and connection made to Goku's family, the existence of the Kaioshins, a space between time where one can intersect with the unlimited timelines...those all make sense given what has come before. But stuff like new Super Saiyan forms from Super Saiyan 3 and onward, Goten and Trunks being prodigious enough to master Super Saiyan and (when fused) Super Saiyan 3 as children, the kind of increasingly nonsensical abilities that Buu has, Beerus being the one to commission the destruction of Planet Vegeta, all of these parallel universes, Goku Black, Future Mai, Zeno, Broly and Paragus, randomly existing relatives of Commander Red and Dr. Gero, much of what goes on in the Super manga and Dragon Ball Heroes game...it's all a bunch of nonsense that truly feels as pulled out of Toriyama and his collaborators' asses as it is.

I still love the Dragon Ball franchise and even have fun with the stuff I just listed, but man, that period between when it started and when the Android Saga ended can't be topped.