#I FELT THAT IN MY CORE

[muncedes]

this was.. everything and more

I Wanna Be Yours | joe burrow

pairings : joe burrow x reader

word count:16k+

synopsis: joe has been keeping his distance from you , upon discovering why your friendship changes forever.

warnings: reader being totally oblivious, mentions of slight body dysmorphia, reader has 🧚🏽‍♀️beauty marks🧚🏽‍♀️, Joe being an asshole for like a second, best friends doing couple shit, smut, oral sex (fem receiving), overstimulation, a rushed ending (literally wrote it at 3am),

A/n: finally letting my baby I've been keeping since July 2022 out, it's been well, may you find success 😭 enjoy yall

From Joey:

Hey, I'm skipping out on movie night. Sorry.

You stare down at your phone with a frown, after re-reading the text for the third time. Making sure you were reading things clearly. Your gaze reflects an aggressive glare. Are you fucking kidding me? He's bailed out on you yet again, you wouldn't be so annoyed if this was his first time canceling. However, recently, Joe has been clearly avoiding you at whatever cost. He has become particularly standoffish with you lately, giving you nearly every excuse in the book when you offer to hang out. If it's not working out, it's a team meeting, and when that's not an option- he says he's "too tired". His excuses were aplenty.

Joe has many attributes, but being a good liar isn't one of them. You knew something is wrong. Feeling very offended, you eventually begged him to hang out with you one day. After all, it's been a while since you two actually spent some time together, a perfect opportunity. But as soon as he showed up at your condo, your plan backfires. The plan for the day you arranged turned into Joe purposely busying himself away from you like the goddamn plague. Giving you halfhearted responses, making sure his attention was everywhere but you the entire time he was there while giving you the cold shoulder, in spite of what? You have no clue. And that is what's been killing you, the reason you're being utterly disregarded is entirely baseless. 

That horrid hangout was last month, and since then you haven't seen and hardly talked to each other up till yesterday when you swallowed down the grudge you were planning on holding and invited him over for a movie night. Something you used to do frequently when you were kids.

Swallowing down the anger and hurt, a moment of worry comes through. If it was any other friend giving you nothing but a buoyancy of discourteousness you would've reciprocated the same energy. Without hesitation. However, this was no ordinary friend. This is your best friend, someone you have known ever since he was merely an awkward preteen that had an obsession with Nickelodeon and Disney. The first and only child you ever knew was when you first moved to Plains Ohio when you were just nine years old. It has always been you and him, the classic two peas in a pod. He saw you pass through every milestone, from having your first crush, to your first experience of heartbreak, and the first time you had fallen and broken a bone on your body at the local neighborhood playground which resulted in eleven-year-old Joe carrying you all the way home crying. 

Just as he was there for you, you were there for him. Throughout all high school, you've been to every single one of his games, basketball or football. When he suffered through his drought at Ohio State you were there giving him encouragement and support. And when the opportunity came for Joe to take his talent down to Louisiana at LSU, you were right there. As well as taking multiple trips to games to support him, as you juggle between school and extracurricular activities. His career progressed into the NFL, and you sat right beside him on his parent's couch cheering him on. You were always there.

Reading his text over yet again you type out a response. 

To: Joey

you've really been a terrible friend lately…if there's something wrong you can tell me 

You watched as the "delivered" text turned into "read at 8:30pm". It wasn't long before the three grey dots appeared showing you that he was typing out a response. Sitting up from your slouched position on the couch, your heart race increases as you imagine all the possible responses to his reasoning for being such a shitty friend. 

This better be a good fucking reason, you thought watching the gray dots appear and reappear again as if he was typing out a whole novel worth. You clicked your phone off and placed it beside you, not wanting to look at the screen any longer, hoping that it will somehow make his response come faster. You wish that he was face to face so you could take a read at his expression, maybe he'll feel guilty that he's treating you like this or angry as he expresses what you might've done to make him act this way.

Eventually, your phone buzzes, and a sigh leaves you as you muster up the courage to open the message. And when you do, your mouth slackens.

From Joey <3

K.

That's certainly not the response you were looking forward to, did he really just send you a one-word—not even a whole word—a one-letter text? Despite being absent in your presence it felt like he had landed the biggest slap on your face, followed by a simple "fuck you". The analogy was a bit drastic, sure but so was his response. It was deceptively simple, though it tells you a lot. 

Your finger itches to hit the call button and give him an earful of scornful remarks. But you decided against it, knowing it would only add insult to injury he's clearly got an issue with you, and instead of being the one who does the chasing, you're going to let him come to you.

"Fuck him." You grumbled, shutting off your phone and tossing it aside with a little more force than usual as if you were imagining it hitting his face. Letting out a pitiful huff you look at the variety of snacks you had gotten scattered on the coffee table, including your best friend's favorites. 

Without giving him another thought, you reluctantly grabbed the bowl of popcorn and turned on the TV. Your movements were sluggish and unintentionally nonchalant, the curiosity was still nagging in the back of your mind. 

What the hell did I do to him?

"I'm sure you didn't do anything wrong," Mrs. Burrow assures you, a ground rake in her hands as she smooths out the soil bed. You stood in the middle of the miniature garden surrounded by vigorous plants, fruits, and vegetables. After your somber movie night two days ago, your curiosity only grew about Joe's unorthodox behavior. Despite telling yourself you weren't going to go on a wild goose chase for him.

Truth be told, you had too much of an empathic nature about you to give him the cold shoulder right back. As much as you wanted to, that was simply not your character. 

You were his best friend, someone with whom he can tell everything whether it was good or bad. It felt very defective to brush him off aside not knowing if he was undergoing something that was truly difficult. To have a better insight along with some real needed advice, you decide to unleash your complications on Mrs. Burrow, his mom. Hoping to have a clear-cut understanding of what's been going on with her son.

"Has he contacted you since?" She adds, pausing a moment to stick the tool into the ground leaning against it, with one hand on her hip.

You bit your lip, looking off to the side. "He tried to,"

"What does that mean?" She furrowed her eyebrows curiously.

"He texted me yesterday morning and I left it on read." You said almost shamefully as you realize how immature it appears. But you honestly didn't care. If he was going to act petty with you for whatever reason, you were going to do the same with him. "It was only a Spongebob meme, but that's his way of trying to act like everything is okay." You were sure of it.

"You kids are truly something else, I don't like seeing you guys like this." Mrs. Burrow shook her head in disapproval.

"He's the one who started it!" You exclaim, feeling a sense of deja vu of the time when you and Joe were kids and would point the finger at each other about who broke her favorite vase. "Sorry, I'm probably putting you in a really awkward position right now."  You said sheepishly, making your way to the small two-person table and taking a seat with a sigh.

She followed suit taking a seat on the opposite side of you, the rake still in her hands. 

"Honey, you're fine. This is just all so unsuspected." She says.

And you could see why, you and Joe hardly ever had any problems, sure you guys would bicker about something every now and then. But it has never come down to this where one is being hostile towards the other, you could remember the times you were mad at him for no less than two days, let alone have the ability to be disdainful for weeks like he's been with you. 

That's what hurts the most, him allowing himself to be distant without a care in the world, acting as if though it doesn't affect him. Here you were mind going crazy about what he's possibly going through, yet it seems to be he doesn't give two-shits about how you're feeling and concerns right now.

"I don't know what to do," You said, sounding completely defeated, leaning your chin in your palm.

"Maybe you should go talk to him, face to face?" She suggests.

"Yeah, I guess that wouldn't be too terrible." You agreed reluctantly, that had been your next move even though a part of you wanted him to come to you instead.

"So," Mrs. Burrow said with a smile. "I hear you're dating someone."

You let your face light up in surprise at her abrupt mention of your dating life, automatically knowing who informed her. 

"His name is Malik." You told her though you're more for certain that she already knew that.

She let out a hum, before looking at you seriously. "Is he treating you right? I heard he's a bit of a playboy." 

You wanted to roll your eyes, of course, Joe ranted off his hatred for Malik, saying the same shit, yes Malik had his reputation as a playboy back in high school. However, years passed and a lot has changed so much that you didn't even recognize him when you ran into each other at the grocery store, the presumptuous and egoistic high school boy you once knew was now replaced with an amiable and responsible man. Yet you couldn't get Joe to see that, no matter how much you pleaded and begged for him to hear you out about Malik he simply wouldn't listen. 

You still remember the day you told him about the first date you were going on with Malik, angry was an understatement describing how Joe reacted.

Multiple curses fell from your lips, as you stood in front of the bathroom mirror struggling to wrap your thick and luxuriant hair into a neat ponytail. Due to how voluminous your hair is, your hands were insignificant trying to grasp every single strand. This has been a complication with you for as long as you could remember, when your hair is not tamed you would always need a second pair of hands to assist. And those hands would always lead to,

"Joey!" You called out, letting your arms flop down to your sides in defeat. He was supposed to have a lunch date with his friends who were bringing their gfs/wives, not wanting to feel like the oddball he invited you to keep him company. You were supposed to leave twenty minutes ago, and you just knew if you kept taking a chance with your hair it would be hours.

Grasping your brush and two ecstatic hairbands, you left the bathroom.

"Yeah?" His voice sounded muffled coming from all the way downstairs.

You skipped down the stairs and made your way into the living room seeing him sitting on the edge of the sofa, legs spread, with his phone in hand, eyes focused on the screen. 

"Can you help?" You asked, holding up your hands which held the brush and hairband.

Almost immediately he pulls his attention away from his phone to look at you with a small smile. "Sure, c'mere."

Your heart skipped a beat at his attention towards you,  you made your way towards him without saying a word, you handed him the brush and hair band before plopping down on the floor in between his legs. His thick thighs caged you in, barley being covered due to the pink shorts he wore, you were so close to him the scent of his cologne filled your senses. 

This was a bad idea, you thought, feeling him carefully brush your hair. Relishing in his gentle touch, you had been in the position many times before with him helping you with your hair, why does it feel different now? The answer is,  In those times you didn't stupidly develop a crush on him. 

As much as you tried to ignore it, those thousands of butterflies swarming around inside you couldn't be stopped. Or the hopelessly long gazes you found yourself giving him when he wasn't looking. It was incredibly impossible not to fall for him. He's so sweet, considerate, understanding, yet so complex in many things as well as being extremely overprotective. But you didn't care, he wouldn't be Joe if he didn't have all those aspects about him.

A small sigh of content escapes you before you could stop it, due to how engrossed you were into thinking about the man that was generously helping out in doing your hair.

He paused and set the brush aside before grasping both of your cheeks, tilting your head back so you could look at him in an upside down Spiderman kiss way.

"You good?" He asks, his thumb rubbing by your hairline. 

A shiver went down your spine at the seemingly loving gesture. Sometimes you wonder if Joe ever felt an ounce of the same feelings you have for him. But then you remember Joe has always been affectionate and gentle towards you, it wouldn't be right for you to try and make it into something that it's not. 

Giving him a weak smile you nodded your head that was currently being cradled in his large hands. "I'm fine."

"C'mon you can tell me." His eyes twinkled with curiosity at your feeble response.

No you can't, you really couldn't not without dying from shame and embarrassment.

"Really I'm fine" you say , looking deep into his blue eyes a few strands of hair fell down his forehead from him leering over you, your fingers itching to brush it away. 

Joe starts to open his mouth to say something when the phone that was in the front pocket of your shorts began ringing. He removes his hands from your face and settles them back into your hair as you retrieve your phone.

You looked at the caller ID and noticed it said 'Malik' almost immediately you hurriedly pressed ignore in guilt. Here you were sitting in between the legs of your best friend who you have a huge crush on, while the guy that was taking you out on Friday night was calling you. 

"Who's Malik?" Joe asks with a familiar caution in his voice. 

Oh boy, you knew a wave of excessive protection was headed your way. Along with some serious interrogation, after your last not-so-pretty breakup two years ago almost every boy you ever showed interest since then Joe manages to scare them off. These days you won't dare mention a guy that you were seeing in wary of Joe's overprotective tendencies. 

"Malik, ya know from high school? I ran into him at the store two weeks ago, um, we've been talking since," You trailed off, noticing the brushing of your hair was getting slower and slower. You could practically hear the gears turning inside his head. " He wants to take me out on Friday."

"Malik as in, Malik Jack-ass?!" He exclaimed, stopping his movements.

You glanced over your shoulder, his expression was hard to read but you could tell the bits of shock coming from it.

"It's Jackson, and yes." You say, not wanting to refer him to the nickname you and Joe came up with in high school.

"What the hell are you doing talking to him?" The wrinkles between his eyebrows appeared as he looked at you with confusion and annoyance. 

"Because I can? Look, he's not the same Malik from high school okay? He's really changed." You explained.

He lets out a scoff. "And you know that from the amount of time you've been talking to him, which is?"

You hated how he made sense.

"Two weeks," You mumble out, watching Joe throw his hand up in the air in exaggeration. "But, I can just tell he's different now! If he was the same guy back then, I wouldn't last a day talking to him."

"You don't think he still has those same qualities ? People just don't get rid of that shit, that's usually the type of person that they are!" His voice was heavy with fury and his eyes were narrowed. Joe always has a protective effect over you, but you've never seen him express this much anger over a guy you were talking to.

"Whatever Joe, it's not cool to judge people from their past, especially when they were in high school!" You shot back, turning your body back around prompting him to continue with your hair.

"I'm not being judgemental I'm simply taking into consideration the way he's treated girls so he won't do the same to you." He gathers your hair a little roughly and tight forming it into a high ponytail causing you to hold on to his bare thigh for stability as you wince. 

"Ow! Take it easy," You scolded, swatting him on the leg. "And he won't!" You said after he was finished, turning back around to face him, still sitting in between his thighs.

"How would you know? You're not going on the date." He responded,  you gave him a look of bewilderment .

Did you hear that right?

"Excuse me?" You questioned, eyebrows being raised in shock.

"You heard me, I'd be the worst fucking friend ever to let you set yourself up for disaster like that." His jaw was clenched, and you noted the way he said the word 'friend' almost as if he was disgusted to call himself that which confused you a whole lot more.

"You're not acting like my friend, you're straight up acting like my goddamn father right now! Which is so fucking annoying let me do what I want to do Joe, I'm not helpless." You huffed out, due to you being only two years younger than him for as long as you could remember Joe looked at you as if you weren't responsible or competent . He had his reasons to think that, back when you were younger however you needed him to know that you were twenty-three years old, very much capable of handling your own situations and relationships. 

Joe looks at you for what seems like forever with mixed emotions, before letting out a humorless laugh and throwing up his hands as if he was backing off. "Okay, you got it, I'll be sure to refrain from saying "I fucking told you so" when shit doesn't work out the way you wanted it to."

And he was right, things hadn't been working out the way you wanted to, but Malik wasn't the problem—far from it actually, it was you, for the longest you'd been trying to force the feelings you have for Joe to disappear and create something with Malik. Which ultimately made you try to walk in a relationship with only for the convenience it brings. You were content for the time being but you weren't truly over the moon or jumping with joy. All because you couldn't shake off the devotion you have for Joe. In the short time of five months with Malik you've found yourself thinking about him. 

Every.Single.Time 

Whenever Malik pulls you into a hug, you couldn't help but to think about Joe's much longer and stronger ones being wrapped around you. When he goes to give you a kiss, you imagine the lips you've been itching to taste for years, being pressed against yours. There was no way around it, and you felt completely horrible knowing Malik didn't deserve any of it. Which is why you ended things with him two weeks ago.

You inform Mrs. Burrow that you were currently single and weren't seeing him anymore. Her face contorts in surprise, with a bit of joy?

"Oh dear, what happened? He didn't do anything, did he?" She asks with concern

"No, it just didn't feel right, I guess." Your words come out in a mumble of shame, knowing you ended a potentially good relationship with someone due to your overwhelming love you have for your best friend who's currently ignoring you.

"Hm, wasn't the kind of guy that you're going for?" She says with a knowing smile, you felt as if her words had a double meaning to them or maybe your detection was off.

"No," You let out a sigh. " He wasn't."

"Does Joe know?" She asked curiously.

"No, don't think he'll care too much anyway." You shrugged.

"You don't know that, it'll probably make his day." She waves her hand dismissively, causing your eyebrows to knit together.

At first, her words confused you, why would Joe be happy? There was no reason for him to be before your realization hits you like a truck. You remember Joe's off Standish behavior when you first brought Malik around him, it was at a small get-together party hosted by your mutual friend from high school, and his displeasure went unnoticed by everyone. You thought it was just his socially awkward persona, but now you are looking back at all the times his mood went black whenever Malik was in his presence. Now that you are in deep thought about it, you realize that the whole time you were with Malik Joe was slowly distancing himself from you. 

Was he still holding his animosity towards your decision to date Malik? 

"I assume you'll be able to make it this weekend though right?" She says, breaking you away from your thoughts.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What's going on this weekend?"

"The trip to Hocking Hills," She said. "Joe told me you wouldn't be able to make it because you made plans with Malik."

"I'll try to make it." You told her, depending on how your visit with Joe would go.

After chatting with Mrs. Burrow for a couple of minutes you finally said your goodbyes and made your way to your car. As you drive down the familiar street of Joe's neighborhood, in preparation for how this unsuspected visit from you will go. You couldn't help but feel nervous, not knowing what the outcome will be. Eventually, you made it to his luxurious townhouse, as you parked behind his Porsche in the driveway you notice an unfamiliar car parked in front of the lawn with the engine running, when you got out and walked up the gravel walkway you glance at the green neon lights in the windshield, squinting your eyes you realize the word 'uber' is branded inside the car.

As you neared the entrance of the home, you went to lift up your hand to knock on the door. But before you could do that, the door swung open revealing not only a shirtless Joe but a girl next to him who made you do a double take due to the fact she was a girl you didn't think Joe would go for, she's a girl who looks just like you.

The sight has you completely baffled, she has your exact physique, along with the same type of full hair, and the same skin complexion. The only thing you notice that's different is her facial features, which helped with noticeable botox. 

Definitely a instagram model, you thought eyes dancing around her entire physique. Her own eyes looked you up and down condescending.

"Did I come at a bad time?" You asked taking a quick glance at Joe noticing his arm wrapped around the girl's waist.

"No you're fine." Joe clears his throat before saying. "This is-"

"Abby! My name is Abby" The girl interrupts give you smug smile as she offers her hand.

You took another look at Joe before bringing your attention to Abby grasping her hand with a tense smile. "Y/n, nice to meet you."

"I didn't know, you were coming over" Joe spoke, his voice laced with surprise and his face burned red as if he'd been caught sticking his hand in the cookie jar.

"Yeah, thought I'd pop up to see how you were doing." You cut your eye at him as you gave him a sarcastic smile.

Abby clears her throat looking between you two, more specifically you as she takes note of your tensed expression as you glare at the man beside her.

"Well, um, I'm gonna head out." Abby spoke, sensing the tension, she turned to Joe and gave him a sly smile. "Call me?"

He struggles to look at her as he replies."I will stay safe."

Abby proceeds to walk out giving you a subtle nod as you watch her walk down the walkway and into the backseat of the Uber, when the car door closes you turn to face Joe with a raised eyebrow. 

"What's that look?" He asks as you step inside, closing the door behind you.

"Nothing, just surprising your dipping your toe into something new." You said turning around to face him, taking in his disheveled appearance. His hair was slightly messy with a few curls dropping down, and his sweatpants hung low. Before you slipped into the depths of a salivating horn ball, you quickly looked away. "Or should I say your dick?"

Joe let out a breathless chuckle, running his hand over his hair multiple times. "What are you doing here?"

"What are you doing here?" You mocked, Joe rolled his eyes at your childish answer as he stepped away from the doorway. "The real question is, what's up with your attitude lately?" You follow him out of the foyer and into the living room, where you spot two empty wine glasses. With a frown you turned your attention elsewhere, hating the fact that it was more likely when you were sitting watching horrible movies all night by yourself, Joe was accompanying someone else as you drowned in sorrow from his absence.

"Nothing, I've just been busy." He says looking everywhere but your face as he grabs the glasses from the coffee table and heads to the kitchen. 

"With Abby?" You say, leaning your forearms against the island counter as you watch him place the glasses in the sink. "Is that why you're acting like this?" You questioned again, You couldn't help the bitterness in your tone, from jealousy and anger.

From all the years you've known Joe, you know that he likes to keep his relationships private, and behind closed doors. He has a history of withholding his relationship status for the longest until he suddenly pops up with a girl on his arm randomly. To this day he wouldn't gossip about any girl that he takes interest in, he'd rather keep it to himself. Displaying his romantic life with anyone for Joe was a no-go.

"Acting like what? and no, she's just a friend." He responds, rinsing the glasses. His back was turned to you, showing a clear view of his toned muscular shoulder blades with faint red scratch marks. You managed to force yourself to look away, automatically knowing that his definition of her being a "friend" meant that her role is a casual hookup. 

"A "friend" who you ditched your real friend for?" You questioned shooting daggers at the back of his head, before adding. "Your best friend actually, who had to spend her Friday night alone."

"Is that what this visit is about?" He asked turning around while letting out a small huff when he noticed the small glare upon your pretty features, ignoring the way how cute your nose scrunched up or your soft lips form into a pout. 

"Yes! amongst other things, I want to get clear with you." You answered, relaxing your hostile stare.

He let out a hum briefly looking you up and down before saying. "What is it?"

You stood up straighter fiddling with your car keys in hand. "Are you still mad at me for dating Malik? Is that why you've been trying to be distant?"

The curiosity in you peaked more as you watched him draw back, his demeanor appearing to be flabbergasted, while he battled with himself to give you an answer. You wonder if he was conflicted between telling the truth or giving you a bold face lie.

"No, I'm not mad about your dating life. You are your own person. It's not my place to have a say about who you chose to have in your life." He finally says, after a couple minutes of silence. "You're happy, that's all that matters."

You laughed sarcastically. "You know, that would be so touching if it were true."

"It is the truth!"

"If it is, then why are you being so shitty towards me?" You pressed.

"I have not. You're being ridiculous."

"No, you are. You canceled on me yet again!"

Joe rolls his eyes. "Me canceling your plan to hangout automatically makes me a shitty person? Really?"

"No but doing it consistently and purposely makes you one." You said not understanding how can he not see what you were coming from.

"Oh that's rich coming from you." He chuckles as he shook his head.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"How many times have you canceled out on me to make plans with Malik? Do you see me coming into your home calling you a "shitty person" ? No! So cut all of this bullshit out!" His voice is raised and you could see redness creeping upon his neck.

He was getting angry.

"Are you serious? I have never stood you up for Malik it was always work-related." You look at him in disbelief before chuckling." Every time you find a way to bring him up, that just goes to show me you are acting like this because of him."

For some reason you didn't want to tell him you ended things with Malik. The fact he was willing to be mad at you for your choice to date him and neglect you because of it has you pissed.

He threw his hands up in frustration while letting out a deep sigh. "I'm not doing this with you."

"Doing what?"

"Having an argument. Because I called off on a stupid movie night." He furrows his eyebrows as he stares down at you with annoyance. "Don't you have a boyfriend to do that with any way or was he too busy balls deep in another chick to care?"

You felt a deep ache in your stomach as the words leave his mouth. You were hurt for two reasons: him calling your movie night "stupid" especially since you went all out for it buying his favorite snacks and the fact he couldn't see that you really wanted to spend time with him. Not Mali. Him the man who you're really in love with.

"What's really stupid is that you neglect me because you hate Malik so much!" This time your voice was raised as you glare at him.

"I already told you that's not true I've been busy!" He yells running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"Bullshit!" You shouted in return before trying to calm yourself. "Honestly I better go before I say something I regret later."

Joe scoffs while shrugging. "You know where the door is."

You bit the inside your cheek resisting the urge to reach over the counter wrapping your hands around his neck. However, you were never a violent person and couldn't imagine putting your hands on your best friend. So instead without giving him a glance you snatch your keys from the counter muttering under your breath "I hope Abby gave you crabs"

"What did you say?" He asked pushing himself away from the counter. You purposely didn't respond knowing it was one of his biggest pet peeves. As you proceeded to head towards the front door, you could hear his footsteps trailing after you.

"Fine you don't have to tell me, just know I won't be answering your calls or texts!" He shouted after you.

You laughed sarcastically. "Oh what will I ever do without talking to you."

"That's funny considering that's the exact reason you're here right now" He said smugly.

There is no doubt that he has you there, but you cannot allow him to have the final word.

"Unfortunately Malik was unavailable." You shot back .

"Yeah spending time with his other girlfriend I'd assume." Damn he won.

"Shut up!"

"You shut up!"

"Don't tell me to shut up!"

"Just did!"

You would've laughed at the childish banter if you weren't highly annoyed. Leave it to you two to argue like children. Without saying another word you yank the front door opened and proceeded to walk angrily over to your car.

Joe shut the door loudly with a sigh hearing your car drive away. He hates fighting with you, in fact, he hates anything that causes a frown on your face. And knowing he was the reason made him feel like shit. Of course, when you confronted him about being distant, he knew where you were coming from. You were right he has been pushing you away because of Malik. He felt as if its the right thing to do. It made him sick to his stomach that Malik gets to hold and kiss you the way he's been yearning to do for years. To the point the feeling was becoming overwhelming he needed to stay away. Of course, he feels guilty and a little disgusted with himself to put you in the position of feeling like you've done something wrong.

Especially since it's not your fault he's fallen head over heels for you.

The situation is definitely not easy to be in since he's convinced you for sure don't love him like he loves you. Each day goes by and it feels like the feeling grows stronger and gets deeper. He knows feeling this way will only cause a great deal of trouble. The love continues to evolve whenever you were near even when you two were arguing he felt his heart swell with heavy emotion. There were many times he thought about just blurting out how much he's in love with you however in came that fear of confessing to someone you've been close to and tarnishing the indestructible bond you developed.

In fact he would rather suffer knowing you are smitten by another man , than to not have you as his best friend. He couldn't imagine losing you even though it already felt as if he had the minute you told him you're dating Malik.

Letting out another deep sigh, Joe walked into his living room and plopped down on the couch fishing his phone from his pocket to try and get his mind off you for once. Of course, that didn't go well because as soon as he opened his phone he was met with a picture of the two of you on his lock screen.

The picture was taken by his mom on the day of his 25th birthday when you gifted him a bouquet of peach-colored flowers. He remembers the embrace he pulled you in tightly, the pleasant smell of your natural, earthy, and rich scent as he thanked you. As well, he recalls pulling away when his mom announced that she was taking a picture of you both with her brand-new digital camera. Immediately you jumped up in his arms, and your legs were wrapped sideways around his waist in a hip carry position. No surprise there you were always an intimate hugger, never shying away to hold someone close. Your arms encircled his neck, he could feel his cheek pressing against yours as his right forearm gripped your waist and his left hand held the flowers firmly. You smiled brightly as the camera flashed.

Ultimately it became his favorite photo of you both, mostly because how naturally you two looked so much like a couple.

Additionally, the picture managed to capture his favorite piece of jewelry on you. You received it as a college graduation present from him: a two-piece diamond anklet bracelet. The idea of him spending a large amount of money on something so small on you was something you absolutely didn't want to accept at first. It seems you never take it off now, which he really enjoys.

A caller ID soon took over his screen interrupting his gaze. He answers it without hesitation.

"Hey Mom, what's up?" He said.

"Nothing much just finished making your father and I's lunch." Said Robin. "You know Mrs. Elwood from down the street? The nice lady that used to give you and y/n's those gigantic candy bars? Poor thing fell down the stairs."

"Really? That's terrible. Is she okay?" Joe furrowed his eyebrows in concern.

"She suffered a broken hip unfortunately but other than that she's fine. Luckily her daughter was visiting and immediately called 911. So she's currently in the hospital right now, maybe you and y/n can visit her ?" She tells him.

He stayed silent for a moment not knowing if he should tell his mom about the argument he'd just had with you.

"Joe? Hello?"

"Yeah, Ma I'll see." He murmurs picking at the loose thread of his sweatpants. With ample opportunity he'll visit he just wasn't so sure you'll both go together.

"Honey are you okay? you sound a bit down when you picked up the phone." She could immediately detect the sourness in his tone.

"Me and Y/N kinda gotten into an argument." He blurts out, knowing there was no way he could get away from his mom's intuition.

There was silence on the other end for a minute. Now it was Joe's turn to call out. "Mom you there?"

"I'm here, just thinking what in god's name is going on with you two. "

"I don't know mom, she came over bringing up the fact I'm not being a good friend to her." He explains. "Then it escalated from there."

"Was it a really bad argument?"

He shook his head as if she could see him. "No. It was just ridiculous. Her argument completely stems from the fact I didn't join her for movie night."

"And why didn't you?" His mom asked curiously.

"I've been busy." Joe said defensively.

"With what?"

"You know working out, training camp is in a couple weeks. Umm—" He stops to think of any other things he was currently doing which wasn't much.

"Here I'll finish it for you, avoiding my best friend because I'm in love with her and I don't like the fact that she's dating someone." She said in a mocking deep voice.

"Mom!"

"What?! That's exactly what you're doing Joey. And you are breaking her heart in the process." She scowls. "This method of trying to make your feelings go away is not doing you any good. You need to tell her how you feel now is a perfect time."

"How is now the perfect time mom? pretty sure she's got me on her block list." He said while rolling his eyes and he wasn't kidding he knew you can get petty like that.

"For one she's coming on the trip-" His mom started to say but what cut off.

"Mom I already told you she can't make it." He huffs out sinking deeper into a grumpy mood remembering why you're not going. Fucking Malik Jack-ass's birthday since when did you actually give a shit? he swears he never thought he'd see the day.

"Yeah, when she was dating that Malik guy," Robin says and he could practically see the smirk on her face.

What?

"What do you mean?" He asks incredulously. There was a tugging in his heart as his mind process her words. What does she mean by "was dating"? He was certain you were still seeing Malik and you weren't going on the trip.

"I mean Romeo, your girl is single and she's making it to the trip this weekend."

He felt as if ice-cold water have been thrown on him. Millions of questions were running rapidly in his head. You and the Jack-ass broke up? Since when? Why didn't you tell him?

Before he could utter out another word his mom continues to clarify.

"I talked to her earlier when she came over pretty upset by you and told me during our conversation." She adds.

"What? why didn't she tell me?" Joe now felt bad and concerned as to what the hell might've happened between you and Malik.

"She said you probably wouldn't care considering the way you're acting toward her."

If he felt bad before, he now feels like shit. It was a fight between happiness and having pins and needles stick him repeatedly. Before he can do any internal celebrating he needs to know if you were distraught in any kind of way. No matter how long he waited for this day to come he couldn't be happy with himself knowing you were undergoing heartbreak.

"Did she say why?" He said carefully his mind racing with all the possibilities of why you two would break up; Did the old Malik show up? Was he not giving you the amount of attention you deserve?.

"Just that he wasn't the guy she was going for," Robin said reassuringly she knew how passionate Joe was about you. " Don't worry she said he didn't do anything bad, they ended things on good terms."

With that, Joe finds himself at ease but only for a bit, he couldn't fully relax unless he hears it from you directly face-to-face. He wants to know you're not sugar-coating anything in protection for Malik because God knows how badly he's been wanting an excuse to punch him square in the face. Joe was never a fighter by no means but when it comes to his love he wouldn't hesitate to protect.

You hated packing.

Mostly because you were terrible at it. In the past you overpacked so much you felt ridiculous, now you're scrambling around trying to limit the number of outfits and necessities. You tried to make it a thought process but ultimately threw in what you felt is necessary. With a huff, you zipped your travel bag not feeling entirely satisfied you knew once you get to the resort you'd forgotten something. For a moment you thought about not actually going, the argument with Joe still had you in a sour mood best friends or not there's no way you'll enjoy being in his presence for three whole days. But despite that, you knew you couldn't leave Robin in the lurch especially after giving your word.

Halfway through you gathering your items, three loud knocks were heard at the door. Furrowing your eyebrow you checked your phone to see who could be possibly stopping by, but nothing. There wasn't any new text messages and the last person you to talk with was Robin telling her you were still getting ready.

Your feet padded along the carpeted floor toward the door, and curiosity peaked until it didn't. Standing there dressed in a white tee and white hoochie daddy shorts, is Joe practically towering over you.

Immediately your eyebrows were pulled down as you eyed him." What are you doing here?"

"You look nice." He said, looking over your appearance. Nice being an understatement, you looked beautiful, he thank God for the heatwave Cincinnati was currently experiencing because if it weren't for that you wouldn't be standing there in a mini floral print lace dress. You never really wore dresses or anything that showed off your body casually, always finding comfort in baggy stylish clothes. You've always preferred to rather leave something to the imagination. That's one of the things he loves about you.

"Thanks." You mumble, tugging at the cropped cardigan even though it was almost crossing over to 90 degrees outside. Despite the compliment, you still kept your tone cold. "Now are you going to answer my question?"

"Can I come in first? I brought lunch." He helped up a bag in his hand that you didn't notice before.

You contemplate for a minute eyes darting between him and the bag, which has the logo of your favorite restaurant on it. He's trying to butter me up, you thought getting a whiff of the fresh food.

Without saying a word you step aside, you told yourself you were only doing this because you missed out on breakfast. Like knowing the back of his hand Joe navigates through your condo and into your living room. He set the food bag on the coffee table before sitting on the curved sectional sofa. There his expression flicker to something unreadable as he makes eye contact with you.

"Why are you showing up here unannounced?" You asked while taking a seat in your lounge chair.

"Like you did with me a couple days ago?" He raised an eyebrow at you, his tone wasn't irritated or vexed but rather amusing in fact if you weren't mistaken he seem to be in a good mood. A certain glow in his demeanor catches your attention. His overall presence felt relaxed and less annoyed the opposite of what you've seen for months now.

Abby probably lifted up his mood this morning The thought left a bitter feeling in your chest and for that, it made your glare towards him even harder.

Joe notices your harsh stare and chuckles finding it rather cute, of course, he knew you were rightfully mad at him but he couldn't help it your angry faces were never intimidating in the slightest. "Would you stop pouting? you're gonna get wrinkles by the time you hit thirty."

"You still haven't answered my question as to why you are here." You started crossing your legs as well as your arms.

"Maybe if you hadn't blocked my number, you would know." He said reaching into the bag and pulling out the take-out containers. The fresh smell had your stomach grumbling and mouth-watering

"Well, you did say not to call or text." You shrugged. "I was just making it easier for you."

"It isn't. Believe me, not exactly a good day if I don't hear from you. " He sighs. His voice sounded soft and gentle you'd never heard him speak like this before. As soon as his pale blue eyes met yours, you instantly felt a tickling sensation at the pit of your stomach as if millions of butterflies were crowded in one tiny room.

He looks at you with so much....love? no, It can't be. You wanted to scoff at your own delusions of course you would mistake his happy mood for something that's not that there.

Clearing your throat and breaking away from his eyes. "Are you going to answer my question?"

"Do I have to? C'mon, you know we always ride together whenever we go on a trip." Joe didn't care how mad you were at him, there's no way you could break a tradition like that.

"Who says I'm going on the trip?" You said nonchalantly. Though you had a pretty good idea of who it was that told him.

He rolled his eyes. "My mom told me. But you already knew that, so would you stop being stubborn?"

You expected him to elaborate more on what Robin told him specifically about the fact why you weren't seeing Malik anymore but it never came.

You raised an eyebrow while scoffing. "Forgive me for not wanting to be stuck in the car you."

"Look, I know you're still mad at me and for that I'm sorry. Let me make it up to you the best way I know how."

"By giving me food?" You quirked an eyebrow while accepting the container he handed off to you.

He chuckles showing off a duchenne smile. "Well I don't know anything other than food that will make you forgive me."

Your love and affection

a kiss maybe ?

"Coughing up Tee's number didn't cross your mind?" You half-joked. If you weren't stupidly in love with your best friend Tee would definitely be the guy you'll try to go for. He's so sweet and smells good every time you're around him.

Joe instantly loses his smile as he looks at you irritated. Making you laugh out loud. You don't know why, but it amuses you when Joe always felt strange at the thought of you with someone from his team. In fact, he told you it would feel similar, liking one of his blood brothers. "No, It didn't. It never will."

"Don't worry, I'll get it out of you somehow." You assured.

"Good luck with that." He says, shaking his head.

"I'm guessing you're not going to leave until I agree to ride with you, huh?" You inquired as you observed him comfortably lean back into the sofa. He took up the majority of the space, sitting there with his legs wide open and one arm stretched out.

God, you were supposed to be mad at him. But him sitting there looking like that your grudge is becoming fruitless.

"You guessed right. I'm not leaving here without you." He clarifies keeping his eyes trained on you. His gaze has been possessing since the moment he walked in. You heart skips a beat it was a look you certainly wasn't used to coming from him.

Lord give me strength. You thought while swallowing as you focus your attention back on your food.

The humming engine and music faintly played in the background filled the silence in the car. As Joe drove along the highway, one hand on the wheel, the other was picking at his lip. It's about an hour into the ride, and you have yet to indulge in a full conversation with him, only talking in a monotone, giving him occasional one-worded responses, and even answering with "k". He knew you were on some petty payback plan and had every right to be. Back at your condo, he thought maybe the food he'd bring will soften you up to him and it did, but only for a moment. As soon as you two hit the road, you were disconnected from him. Now he was left feeling pretty angsty, never have you two been on a quieter ride in your entire life, especially on a road trip. He really fucked up. With a sigh, he took snuck a peek at you and was met with the most endearing sight.

As your head rested against the window, hands crossed and eyelids hanging low, you stared ahead dazed. Sleep was just a few seconds away. Soft puffy lips he'd dreamt of kissing so many times were slightly parted. The wind that was coming through the window was blowing you long coils all around, you looked ethereal. And even more so in that dress, he wonders if Malik ever had the chance to see you in it or if was he the first person to witness such beauty. Sundresses were never your go-to summer fit so probably.

He came to the realization that you had taken off your sweater and that the strap of your dress had fallen off your shoulder revealing more of the swell of your breast. That's when he saw them. Tiny parallel streaks of thinned glossy skin printed on the slope of your breast. Stretch marks. He'd heard you complain about them to your girlfriends over the phone one time calling the marks ugly.

How so wrong you were. He felt they made you more enticing. Lifelike even. They were an everyday beauty of something he'll like to see often. Striking and heavenly just like you.

The sound of a loud horn pulls him away from his stare.

"Shit!" He cursed loudly placing both hands on the wheel as the angry driver of the semi-truck blew their horn again.

You jerked up in surprise a shriek left your lips as the car narrowly avoid contact.

"Jesus! Joey are you trying to kill us?!" You shouted, heart, feeling like it was ready to burst from your chest.

"Sorry, I kind of spaced out." He replied. His face beat red not sure if it was from almost crashing or the embarrassing fact that you were the reason he was distracted. You were quite literally going be the death of him.

"You're red." You stated with a frown of concern. "Are you okay? Do you want me to drive?"

"No! I'm fine, really." He clears his throat keeping his eyes forward. "Just the heat is getting to me I guess."

The window was immediately rolled up and you reached for the console control panel, where you tapped the ventilation system and selected 'fast air conditioning' without saying a word.

It was something any normal person would do if they were in the middle of a heat wave, however, since he knew you always preferred to have your window down. He didn't bother turning on the air.

Silence filled the car for the next few minutes with Joe's attention fully on the road with a faint smile.

You notice. "What's that grin for?"

"You called me Joey."

"And?" You said wanting him to elaborate more.

"That means you aren't mad at me anymore. Whoohoo!" He cheered taking one hand off the wheel to reach over and enthusiastically shake your shoulder.

Your tongue poked the inside of your cheek trying not to smile at his over-the-top celebration. "Yeah, well, after nearly experiencing death I thought maybe holding a grudge isn't the best way to go out."

"Now who's the one being dramatic? We weren't going to die I had it under control."

"Lost in your thoughts so much you almost crashed is having it under control?" You raised an eyebrow watching him struggle to answer. "What were thinking about anyway?"

You, as always. He thinks.

"How much you were right about me." He says and then fell silent.

He could practically hear the gears in your head turning.

"What do you mean?"

Taking a deep breath his gaze remains on the road. " I didn't like the fact you were with Malik. "

"Why?" Your tone had a sense of hopefulness to it as if you were expecting him to say something.

"Because," He paused thinking over the next words that were going to leave his mouth before continuing to say. " I was stuck into thinking he was the same person from high school and I didn't want my best friend with someone who would hurt her in the end."

Joe missed the way your face dropped with disappointment.

"Well, he didn't."

"I heard. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Other than the fact I'm back to square one, I'd say I'm feeling fine." You said bitterly crossing your arms.

"Don't sweat it, the right one will come." He said.

You scoff. "Easy for you to say, you got people flocking to you left to right."

"Oh, and you don't?Superbowl girl" Joe teased.

You groaned out loud at him referring to the time you went viral for attending the Superbowl the camera broadcast you for millions to see for five seconds. Within a short period of time, you gained followers and thirsty users in your direct messages. For some reason, people thought you were attractive at that moment looking concerned for Joe as he lay on the ground withering in pain.

"You just had to bring that up." You said shaking your head with a smile.

Joe's chuckle erupts throughout the car. " I'm just saying I'm not the only one here whose dms looks like a thirst fest."

A laugh left your lips and he felt his heart swell. Even your laugh was beautiful. It was light and laced with amusement.

"You were right too you know." He looks over at you in confusion causing you to elaborate more. "Things didn't turn out the way I wanted."

"Like I said, don't sweat it. They will soon enough."

You and Joe continued joking, laughing, recalling nostalgic memories for the rest of the ride until you eventually arrived at a modern style lodge cabin. It wasn't over the top luxurious or anything but you can tell that it's sleek and spacious while still having a cozy atmosphere. With the car parked, you immediately got out and stretched while Joe circles around the car to retrieve the bags out the trunk.

"This looks peaceful." You comment looking at the cabin. The mellow glow of the evening sunset made it look extra harmonious.

"And isolated," Joe adds with a sigh.

"Sounds like you got a problem with that." You began to head for the walkway up to the cabin.

"I do." He says walking alongside you toward the entrance of the lodge each hand carrying his and your travel bag. "Easier for us to get killed. Next time I'm picking where we go, not my mom."

"I'll be sure to tell her that." You said in a sly tone.

"Don't you dare." He warned cutting his eye over to you.

Before you could say anything else the front door opens abruptly revealing Joe's mom in all her glory. A smile on her face when she spots you two climbing up stairs of the porch.

"Finally you both are here, I was afraid you guys got lost or something." She said ushering you both in.

Upon entering you were met with a bright and open generous space, with high ceiling and cedar wood construction walls. The entrance of the cabin is connected to the kitchen which is sleek and spacious. It also smelt of Joe's mom infamous meatloaf that has your stomach rumbling. From where you were standing you could into the grand living space that features a dramatic stone fire place and floor-to-ceiling windows. Next door is a formal dining area with the view of the back patio. If you had the option to live here you would gladly take it.

"We almost did. Since someone wanted to tell me about a shortcut they seen on Google maps." Joe not so subtly cut his eye over to you.

"You took that wrong turn,not me." You shot back remembering the moment of frustration when he misheard the direction he was given.

"And let's not forget we wouldn't be standing here at all because someone wanted to daydream behind the wheel." You added.

"What?!" His mom turn her head in direction.

"It was nothing I had it under control." Joe said sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck.

"Jesus, you know what next time we are all going in one vehicle."

"Speaking of next time, he said that you-"

"Ahem!" Out of nowhere Joe started to fake cough uncontrollably.

"You okay honey?"

"Yeah m'fine." He said clearing his throat. You wheeze out a chuckle that didn't go unnoticed by Joe who squints his eyes in your direction when his mom turned her back.

"Well anyway, your father and brothers went out to grab firewood for the firepit tonight. I'll show you both your room so you guys can get settled in." She says walking out the kitchen.

You didn't miss the way she said "room" instead of rooms and apparently Joe didn't either,

"We're sharing a room?"

"Yeah, when I initially thought y/n wasn't going I ended up booking a cabin that fit all of us."

You hated the way your stomach flutter with excitement and nervousness. Sharing a room with Joe was frequent when you were younger was easier and less nervous now as you are a full grown adult with feelings It feels like a dream and nightmare at the same time.

His mom lead you both to the other side of the house , passing the spiral stairs you thought you were going in the direction of. Instead she stops at the only bedroom located in the back of the house on the first level.

"Okay here we are!" She exclaims opening the door revealing a spacious rustic bedroom with wooden ceiling and walls, two large floor-to-ceiling windows faced the direction of the lake. You would've admired it more if the only bed in the room didn't capture your attention.

A faint ding of a timer goes off in a distance.

"That must be my dinner rolls. Get settled in you two!" A smile was thrown your way before she rushes out the room her kitten heeled sandals clicks loudly against the hardwood floor.

There was a pregnant pause as Joe silently walks over to the cushion storage bench to set your bags down. You examine more of the room, specifically to busy yourself from acknowledging the big fat elephant. For the life of you it felt like you couldn't tame your racing heart, sharing a bed with Joe was the last thing you needed in order to get rid of your feelings for him. There's no way you'll be able to get through the night.

"Looks like we got our own bathroom." Joe spoke, snapping you away from your racing thoughts.

You turned in his direction to see him walking inside the adjacent bathroom. Oddly enough you notice he didn't mention anything about the single bed. Clearly it wasn't a big deal for him and it should put you at ease however it raised even more questions. Is he expecting you to protest? Look for another place to sleep?

"Really? That's cool." You said trying to appear nonchalant as possible.

When he steps out the bathroom you see him look at the bed with a grimace. "Nope, absolutely not."

You felt like your heart fell down to your stomach in despair. It was because of you isn't it? Of course he doesn't want to share a bed with you he probably feels weird.

"What is it?" You asked in a quiet tone, pretending to take interest in the outside world.

He clearly sees you has someone who he didn't want to be that close and intimate with.

"It has too many pillows."

Oh.

You looked over and he was right; the king size bed were mostly filled with different sizes of pillows. Before you knew it he began to toss some of them at the foot of the bed.

"Is that necessary?"You asked standing near the opposite side of the bed.

"There going to end up on the floor anyway seeing that m' gonna be dealing with a wild sleeper tonight." He said with a teasing smile.

"I am not a wild sleeper." You said in denial.

"Sure," He sarcastically rolling his eyes.

"Well, you snore so I'll be dealing with that."

"What? No I don't."

"Do, too. You snore like your dad whenever he nods off in his comfy chair." You laughed.

He slowly licks his lips before pressing them together as an attempt to hide his smile and keep a straight face.

"Take that back right now."

"Nope. You sound exactly like this—" You said before mimicking the obnoxious loud sounds you once heard coming from him.

Seemingly out of nowhere he makes his way around the bed launching for you, quick. A shriek left you as he got a hold on you his hands latches their way to your sides fingers wiggling alongside your ribcage. Immediately bubbly laughter left you as you tried to get away not prepared the way his fingers danced around your weak spots.

"Joey! Stop!" You laughed as you fall laying on your back on the bed.

"Take it back." He playfully scolded. His hand moves down towards your stomach the place where he knows you're the most sensitive.

"Noho!"

"You know I haven't given these to you for awhile so you've asked for it now." He chuckles as you try to capture and stop his hands.

"W-wait, hold on!" You yell out rolling on to your sides as you try to move away. The fact that you could very well be revealing everything that underneath your dress wasn't a factor in that moment.

All you could think about the sensations you were experiencing and Joe's laugh in the air mixed with yours.

He began to tickle all over your neck and collarbone, your hands struggled to capture him in order to stop his movements. Soon you broke out in silent laughter. Tears forming at the corner of your eyes at the intensity of his tickles.

"S-s-stop it Joey!" You said in between giggles.

"Or what?" He taunts, pausing his movements.

"You really don't want to know." Your voice was giggly and non-threatening whatsoever.

"Oh yeah?" He said before his hands went back to work.

Your reaction is immediate, a shriek of laughter fell from your lips, legs flailing up causing your dress to rise more likely flashing Joe but you didn't care as you tried to pry his fingers away. 

"Oh,my god. I can't breathe" You said.

He laughed. "Yes you can. Just say sorry and I'll stop."

"Wait,stop, joey."

"That's not sorry." He said.

"Okay! I'm sorry!" You gave in, just as his hand went to your thigh to continue the torture. Tiny droplets of tears rolled down your cheeks, which were weakly wiped away as you were still on the high of laughter.

As he hovers over you on the bed, his hands stop. While catching your breath, you realized the position you were in. Joe was on top of you with one leg caged in between yours, his small diamond chain dangling in front of your face. Relax, calm yourself. Even though you were telling yourself to refocus, that was easier said than done. Because as soon as your eyes met his, the same look he had given you at your condo appears yet again. The same covetous gaze you tried to justify.

He's staring at you like he wants you. Does he want me? You wondered full of hope.

Your heart will stop when he says what he says next.

"You have the most beautiful smile."

You've been complimented before by Joe. However, it has never been done with so much passion and desire. It was shocking and exciting. Especially from someone you never would've thought would speak to you that way. That someone who is your best friend.

But a friend just wouldn't look at you in the way he is now.

"Um, uh, thanks." You stammered out.

He smiles sheepishly. " Hope m' not making you feel weird."

With his large frame leering over you with his arms propping himself up on either side of your head along with that look. Feeling weird wouldn't even be on the list of the thing you're experiencing right now.

"You're fine." You said getting warm.

He opens his mouth to say something but the sound of loud voices could be heard down the hall. The sound of his dad and brothers voices.

Immediately he gets up as you follow suit adjusting your dress which had risen up quite high.

"I'm gonna go see if they need help with the firewood." He said before abruptly leaving the room quite flustered himself and was looking everywhere but you.

As the day progressed, you and Joe were in a state of awkwardness and uncertainty. As a result, you had allowed yourself to ignore the obvious tension and converse with his family throughout dinner. You couldn't help but glance at Joe, who was already staring at you before quickly averting his gaze elsewhere. However awkward it may have been for you, you can't now deny that he was at least attracted to you.

It had your head spinning and heart skipping. Yet you couldn't help but to feel confused as to why. Was it the dress? Or did he got caught up in the moment? The questions were embedded within your mind later on in the evening when you found yourself sitting around the fire, everyone was stuffed from dinner and delicious pumpkin pie all except Joe who is on his second serving of the dessert. Voices and laughter overbearing the crackling of the fire as you sat silent enjoying the nature and atmosphere around you.

You were brought out your thoughts by soft weight being layed upon your exposed shoulders.

"Hey, cover up with this ,honey it looks like your freezing." You turn your head to Joe's mom wrapping a chunky knit blanket around you.

"Thank you." You said in relief, she was right with the temperature drastically dropping down your thin dress was fruitless against the night weather. "Whatcha got there?"

"A guide of all the things we can go to and do tomorrow" She said taking a seat next to you in the empty camp chair a small pamphlet in her hand. "There's a winery and flower farm I think would be great to visit."

"That seems fun." You would actually agree to go anywhere, it hasn't even been an entire day yet you could feel yourself catching cabin fever already.

"Oh! I meant to ask if you were comfortable with the room situation? If you're not I can always make one of these goofballs room with each other." She gesture towards Joe and his brother who were joking around with each other.

"I don't mind it." You said and immediately cringing at how fast you answered.

"Good, maybe this be will your opportunity to confess your feelings to him ." She blurted out.

Your head whipped in her direction so quick you were surprised it didn't snap. "W-what?"

" The looks were giving at him during dinner alone gives it away, honey."

You wanted to be mendacious and deny. Though it would be pointless as one, you wouldn't come across as believable and two, she wouldn't buy it either way. To be cautious you took a glance in Joe's direction he was still engrossed in his conversation with his brother, it brought you a huge relief he didn't hear anything that was said. You would've probably died from embarrassment.

"It's that obvious huh?" You said with chuckle.

"He feels the same way to you know." She says casually. "You guys just needs to stop dancing around before it hurts you both."

"I don't want to risk ruining our friendship." You muttered, staring ahead at the fire. You knew your friendship is valued and didn't want it to end because you misinterpreted things with Joe.

"He is very attached to you, so I don't think that will happen."

Before you could utter another word a droplet falls from the sky and lands on your cheek followed by another. Soon came the sound of pounding thunder in a distance. Everyone immediately got up from their seats and began to scramble inside. Once you were away from the rain it seem everyone went their separate ways to call it a night.

After saying goodnight to Joe's parents you and him both proceeded to head towards your shared room. The room you'd been given that has one bed. There wasn't a single word uttered once you entered the room and has you walked over to your bag to fish out your pajamas which is a oversized looney tunez t-shirt gifted by the man himself and a pair of pajamas pants....which is not packed. Your eyes widened, the pajamas pants you were sure you packed weren't there.

You searched frantically in the bag hoping you may have overlooked but came up empty handed, except your underwear and t-shirt. God this is going to be awkward.

"What's wrong?" Joe asked taking off his shoes as a distressed sigh leaves your lips.

"Nothing I just forgot something." You mumbled out quickly going inside the bathroom to do your nightly routine.

Another deep sigh left you when you shut the door behind you and turned on the lights. The bathroom is fairly spacious with an elegant rustic style that goes along with the rest of the cabin. Typical personal care products and essentials are splayed throughout. When you got finished admiring you walked toward the huge walk-in shower. You knew the water controls would cause you a headache just by looking at it. And it did after several attempts of learning you finally got to your right temperature and soon as you stepped in before shutting the glass door the heated water soon soothes your tense muscles. The Steam rose to the ceiling clouding above your head, and the sweet fragrance of your body wash filled the space around you as you gently rub it against your skin.

As you got lost lathering your thoughts began to drift to the conversation you had with Joe's mom.

He feels the same way too you know

No, you in fact don't know, aside from the moment earlier you don't ever remember Joe looking at you with any interest.

It was hard to not take Joe's mom's word though. Especially since she's the person who knows him well and through. Now you started to question his real reason for disliking Malik. Was he just jealous the entire time? Just the thought made you happy and feel lightheaded.

You begin to hum to try to take your mind off the speculation and forced yourself to think of something else.

Finally, after what felt like forever, you turned the shower off and stepped onto the fluffy mat. You quickly dried off and lather your body before slipping on your underwear and t-shirt. Sighing, you glanced in the massive rectangular mirror, mentally wincing at how the shirt came down to your mid-thigh. Fingers brush over the tiny stretch marks that are splayed on the side of your thighs. Deep down, you knew nothing was wrong with them and that it was natural and inevitable. But you couldn't help to think about Joe's reaction to them. Would he find it strange?

You shook your head mentally scolding, hating yourself for getting sprung over what a man thinks of your body. No matter who it is, you were raised better than that.

When you emerged from the bathroom along with steam. You find Joe sitting down on the end-of-a-bed bench with a full bowl of popcorn and a remote in his hand as he stares at the TV. He turns his head in your direction when he sees you walk past him swiftly to put your discarded clothes away.

"What's all this?" You asked after zipping your bag, gesturing toward the bowl.

"Isn't it obvious? I owe you a movie night." He says quite proudly.

"Hm , I thought it was stupid?" You said tugging down the shirt as you walk over to the bed.

"What I said was stupid" He shakes his head. "I'm doing this as a part of making it up to you."

There goes that look again....

"So what do you have in mind?" You climb on the bed careful not to flash your underwear and layed by the end of the bed flat on your stomach.

"I was thinking you pick while I'm in the shower?" He holds out the remote for you to take which you gladly did.

"Don't mind if I do." You muttered, immediately going to horror. It was the perfect setting a horror movie night anyway, deserted cabin, heavy rain and thunder.

"No horror movies!" He adds standing up and getting ready to head into the shower.

"Scaredy cat." You called out right as the bathroom door shuts behind him.

Thirty minutes later, Joe returns from the steamy bathroom with just sweatpants and a towel drying his wet hair. In the same position, he spots you laughing at your phone most likely at a tiktok video . Your eyes caught his gaze and you sit upright turning off your phone. He gulps suddenly becoming nervous, it's been awhile since you've shared a room and the first time to actually share a bed together. For the longest he's dreamt of this. The love he has for you is too strong to ignore the situation and act like everything is fine.

"Superbad or The Hangover?" You asked keeping your eyes on him as he got situated on the bed next to you.

He ponders for a second before saying. "Um, Superbad, haven't seen that one in awhile."

The wind continues to howl as the rain pours down harshly outside when you press play. He pretends not to notice the brush of your elbow, despite being in a fairly large bed you two were in close proximity both sitting up with your backs on the headboard. In his peripheral vision, he secretly stares at your side profile looking for any sign of discomfort about the fact your lying in the same bed. Instead he sees you focused on the TV laughing without a care in the world. Your relaxed state automatically makes him feel the same way. No big deal. It's just like sleeping by himself, and he's willing to pretend he's alone. Yet how can that be possible when he is in fact not alone and is joined by you—the person he's head over heels for in just a t-shirt? No doubt it will be a challenge.

"That was you in high school." You nudged him before pointing towards the screen which splayed Michael Cera's character Evan awkwardly talking to Becca.

He scrunches his nose. "I'm gonna pretend you didn't just say that."

"Am I wrong though? Remember Emily Robinson from study hall?" You questioned with a teasing smile adorned on your face. "She pretty much threw herself you at every given chance and you were totally oblivious. "

"The opposite is true, I wasn't oblivious." He said with honesty.

Confusion filled your eyes as you furrowed your eyebrows. "What? You're lying!"

"I promise you I'm not." He chuckles throwing his hands up in defense. " I knew she liked me, I just didn't know how to tell her off."

As you shake your head, you exclaim, "Oh, that's so hard to believe."

"And why's that?"

"That's the case with virtually every girl who shows interest in you."

He shrugs. "Or who knows maybe it's because I'm always looking at someone else."

"That's a possibility." You said in a quiet tone completely unaware how he looked at you while saying that.

The irony of teasing him about his obliviousness and failing to see how deeply in love he is with you is quite funny. Outside eyes are already taking notice of what is happening. Why couldn't you? She's waiting for you to make the first move his mother would say and he prays to god she's right.

For the rest of the night you spent watching a couple more films as the storm outside turns into light drops of rain. It was 2am when you both decided to finally call it a night, after flickering off the TV you cautiously tucked yourself underneath the covers Joe is currently under. There's a generous amount of space between you as you faced away from each other, tension arises as the only sound in the room is the plattering of the rain.

By a slight whisper you wished him a goodnight.

As your body rolls over yet again for the millionth time, you let out a frustrated sigh. Sleep seemed so close yet so far away. You've tried practically every method from counting sheep over the fence to creating fake scenarios, all of which include the man sleeping next to you. And still nothing . This type of restless night drives you crazy, sleeping in an unfamiliar setting causes this and because you can't help but to still process you're sleeping in the same bed as Joe, so your mind couldn't help but wonder.

You kicked majority of the blankets off your body hoping that some coolness would ease your mind into exhaustion. Again, nothing. Feeling completely hopeless you sat up, eyes looking around as if you could make out anything in the pitch darkness the only thing that's visible is the alarm clock on the nightstand that reads 3:30am.

Movement beside you caught your attention as Joe rolls over on his stomach. You couldn't distinguish which direction his head was turned as you laid back down as an idea came to you.

It's worth a shot, hopefully he'll take pity on you.

"Joey?" You whispered.

No response of course, you said it so low you practically mouthed it. You were still debating on whether you should wake him up or not. It's selfish and quite frankly inconsiderate you know this. Especially since you're ruining someone else's good night sleep for you own gain. But you're desperate and can't go to sleep so you call out his name again a bit more louder.

"Joey?" This time you reach over to softly poke at his bare shoulder. Since when did he take off his shirt?

"Yeah?" He responds , in a voice that sounds nothing like he'd just been woken up.

"Are you awake?" You ask , dumb question. Of course he's awake, sounds like he's been up this entire time.

A slight chuckle comes from him. "No, I'm asleep."

"How long have you been up?" You mumbled.

"Since you start fidgeting"

So about an hour. Damn.

"Sorry , I can't go to sleep." You said sheepishly.

Suddenly, there is silence and you believe he has fallen asleep until you feel him shift closer to you. Your back is facing him, and you are so glad it was because you got flustered instantly. He lifted the blankets up and said softly. "C'mere"

Well fuck, there's no way you're going to be getting any sleep tonight.

Without saying a word you shift under his arms, his bare chest pressed against your back as you got situated. A sigh of content escapes you as Joe practically engulfs you in his embrace. He feels so warm,big,and strong. His arm pulls you in tighter which you had no problem with. This is definitely not what best friends do.

What is this?

"Are you comfortable?" He asked you could feel his lip on the shell of your ear and the urge to turn around to lock lips is strong.

Swallong thickly you nod your head. "I am, didn't think you're the cuddle type Joey."

"M'not but I know you are." He says.

That's true. Almost everyone knows you're a fan of cuddles, so much in fact you sleep with a body pillow at home.

"Well, thank you." You said in a way to be grateful as you trace over the multiple prominent veins on his hand in front of you. You wished to see the size comparsion to your hand and his but you could feel it. So big just like the entirety of him.

You weren't blind you'd seen how Joe has grown into his muscular frame since the Superbowl, the countless workouts really pays off as his arms and chest became more defined. Which you are more than lucky enough to be currently cradled in. Reality hits hard at the situation. Joe is cuddling you right now, full on koala hugging you from behind. You always wondered was it'll be like to be smothered in his arms, close to his body, you never thought you'd see the day.

During your enjoyment of mindlessly playing with his hand, you can feel his heart beating against your back. As if he were nervous or scared. As you furrow your eyebrows, you open your mouth to ask him what's wrong when he grabs your hand and laces it with his.

"I need to tell you something." He says quietly, gripping your hand with firmness.

You tilted your head in his direction with concern. "Everything okay?"

"Not really." He chuckles slightly but it was far from sounding amusing, it was more of a nervy laugh. "You know, I care about you alot. We've been friends since forever and what I'm about to say could possibly ruin that."

"What are you—?"

"I lied earlier," He interrupts causing you to frown.

Lied about what?

"In the car, I told you I was being distant because I didn't want Malik to break your heart." He swallowed heavily, before continuing, "That wasn't entirely true. I just didn't like seeing you with him...or with anybody else."

Time seemed to have slowed down and the air became thicker. Your heartbeat increased, and your stomach twists immediately. However with all those things happening it didn't stop you from uttering out a blatant "W-what?"

It's hard for you to comprehend that he's basically confessing his feelings for you. So long you've hoped and dreamt about this exact moment.

"I want you to be mine and I don't want you to be with anyone else." He sits up leaning on his elbow his other arm is still wrapped around your waist and fingers still laced with yours. "I hate to sound cheesy like those cliché rom coms you make me watch—" He laughs before continuing. "But I'm really in love with you, it's to the point where I can't stop thinking about you."

Happiness bloomed inside you and you felt a sudden flare of relief. Joe—the man you've been in love with—just confessed his feelings. Your heart has been daring to hope that he feels the same way for a while, even though you've convinced yourself that it's not possible.

Holy shit.

"You really love me?" You said gripping his hand tightly.

He leaned down to rest his chin on your shoulder. "I do, so much."

"I love you too," You smiled when you heard him a sigh of relief. Your hand slips from his as you reach up to caress his jawline. "I have for a long time actually. Took you long enough."

You feel him smile and lean against your hand. Just when you thought everything couldn't possibly get better, he opens his mouth and asks a question you've been waiting for so long.

"Is it okay if I kiss you?"

The excitement unfolded like a flower as you nodded your head. And before you know it his mouth is on yours. He's passionate and fierce as if he'd been stranded in a desert in need of a drink and you were that cold glass of water he found and drank so desperately. His tongue traces over your bottom lip before slipping into your mouth wasting no time exploring every inch. You moan as his tongue intensifies swirling against yours , while doing so his hand grips your waist holding you against him.

That's when you feel it. The hardness prodding on your lower back, you could feel it through the thin fabric of your t-shirt which had risen dangerously high.

Pulling away, he kisses you from your jaw to your neck, gently sucking while you gasp, wrapping an arm around his neck as you enjoy the feel of his lips. Under the thick blanket, his hips are pressed against yours, keeping you in a state of shock. He felt massive and thick. And you want more of it.

"I want to touch you." His words are muffled due to his never ending kisses on your neck. "Can I touch you? Hm?"

"Yes, please do." As soon as you gave him the go he takes his hand from your waist and travels down to your expose thigh gently massaging it cherishing how soft you feel. You sigh in contentment, eyes fluttering shut when his hand goes underneath your shirt and go upwards to cup your left breast.

Taking you completely by surprise he rubs your breast before trailing back down to the hem of your underwear where he slips fingers inside. You let out a whimper when his fingertips glides over the area you wanted him the most. His body tense when he felt your arousal that was practically soaking his hand. Tiny moans escape your lips as he circles your sensitive clit, your hips immediately start to squirm.

"Keep still." He groans, his forehead dropping down to rest on the back of your shoulder. You weren't aware that the more you squirm the arch in your back goes deeper, essentially grinding your ass against his hardness.

"I can't, not when you're touching me like this." You murmur hand clutching his forearm where you could feel the muscles flexing with every strum that his fingers makes.

"Fuck!"He grunts breathlessly as your hips continues to move. There's no way he going to cum like this as much as you're making him feel absolutely good he was ready to explode at any given moment by the movement of your hips.

He takes his hand out of your underwear much to your dismay letting out a sound of disappointment he quickly repays you with a kiss on the lips before sitting up yanking the covers off the both of you tossing it to the side.

"Roll over on your back for me." He commanded.

You follow his order, finally coming face to face even though you're in almost complete darkness the outline of his body and features were visible to you. The diamonds from his chain certainly stood out as well. He grabs both of your legs and spread the wide getting situated between them.

"Lift up your shirt all the way." He said quietly, almost at a whisper.

You could feel your sould take flight as a unsuspected feeling of realization consumed you. This isn't a dream, Joe is really here in between your thighs ready to fuck you in the most delicious way possible. No amount of words could explain how happy and eager you feel.

When you finished taking off your shirt he wasted no time bending down attaching his lips on your tits, the coldness of his chain grazes your warm skin causing you to shiver. His tongue flicks and licks around the hardness of your nipple before he gently sucks.

"Hmmm Joey." You moan grasping the back of his head, not knowing what felt more good his tongue or the fact his cock is being pressed against your aching pussy.

Another moan escapes from you when he strokes his hips against you rubbing right on your clit and causing you to be blinded by pleasure. His hair tickles your chin when he switches over to your other breast giving it the same attention. It took everything in you to keep your moans at a lower level, still mindful of the fact you're doing this under the same roof as his family. The last thing you wanted is for one of them to come down and interrupted your intimate session. God , you would never show your face again.

Joe detaches his lips with an audible 'pop' leaving your skin glazed and sit up on his knees while his hands grips your underwear and swiftly pulls it down. Lifting up both of your legs together he takes your panties off completely. Now you're on full display, laying there letting him venerate every inch of your body. For some reason you didn't have the urge to shy away or cover up like you did with past lovers ,no, you are ready for him to see and cherish you including the imperfections.

"You have the softest skin. So beautiful." He mumbled lowering his head to kiss by your hips trailing down to your inner thighs peppering extra kisses on your beauty marks. Joe lifts his head up for a moment grabbing a spare pillow handing it over to you. "You might wanna hold on to that, m'not gonna be able to contain myself."

Without giving it a second thought you wrap both arms around the pillow when he hitches both your legs over his shoulder. His mouth is on you in seconds, low groans leaves his lips as he engulfs his tongue over your folds and run it on your clit where he sucks and massages.

"Oh, my god!" Your words muffle due to your mouth on the pillow. And your hips tries to come up from the bed but they don't have the chance because Joe's hand immediately reaches out to slam you back down.

He takes your legs off his shoulders and held them down each flat on the bed, spreaded wide, his hand on holding down your thighs firmly. The intrusion of his tongue slipping inside you takes you by surprise, a loud raw moan wanted to desperately get out but all you could muster up is a whimper. Eyes closing shut, your legs started to shake at the intense pleasure.

Messy smacking and slurping noise could be heard underneath your heavy breathing, the way he's eating you is borderline sensual yet unhinged. He left no parts untouched, you could feel wetness pool beneath you. Which turns you on even more.

A familiar heat is burning inside at the pit of your stomach and you knew that it'll only be a matter of time you gush out your release.

"M' gonna cum." You sob out in a whisper, twisting your upper body to the side slightly.

Joe pulls away yet again and you swore you were seconds away from reaching down to finish yourself off. However when Joe releases his hold on you and reaches down to take off his sweatpants that idea is immediately gone.

He carries a throbbing cock beneath the thin happy trail; it slaps against the lower abdomen where a prominent vein runs from his tip to his thick shift. There is no way you could deny that you are a little intimidated; the sheer size of him had you gulping.

He settles back in between your thighs, this time lifting your left leg on his shoulder. That's when he notices it, the diamond peice anklet, a smile adorns his face when he pressed a kiss on your ankle. His eyes focuses back on you drinking in your needy state, the pillow he gave you is clenched in your grip with anticipation.

Not wanting for you to wait any longer, he spits loudly into his palm before wrapping around his hand around his length, slick noise of the sound of him jerking could be heard.

Gripping your left leg as your right curls around his waist, he aligned his tip to meet your seeping wet entrance you shuddered feeling a slightly burn from being stretched out.

"It's okay, take a deep breath for me, you gotta relax" He assures you noticing the way your muscles tensed. The last thing he want is for you to be uncomfortable.

You force your eyes to be transfixed on the digital clock on the nightstand as you focus on taking deep breaths for a few seconds. Once it became tolerable and no longer confining he involuntary pushes his hips forward going deeper. As soon as he did that you tighten around him. His face contorts into an expression of pleasure, pressure on your thigh is coming from his hand that grips it tightly. You can tell he was holding himself back from fully pounding into you relentlessly.

His thrusts are slow and impactful. Moans after moans continues to leave your lips.

"Faster Joey, I want you to go faster." You said mindlessly body jerking up at every stroke of his hips.

"You sure?" He asks.

You nodded and he pressing his lips together taking hold of your waist when he slams into hard and fast. Your left leg is still on his shoulder when he leans down to lock his lips with yours silencing your moans. The pillow you were gripping is tossed to the side as you find stability in clutching on to Joe's biceps, digging your nails into his skin.

"Fuck Joey!" You cried out as his tip kept hitting your sweet spot. Faint sounds of skin smacking filled the air along with the sound of your wetness. "O-oh my g-god, you feel so good!"

"You like that baby?" He asked, his chain is brushing against your chin with every stroke.

"Mmhmm, I love you so much." Eyes rolling to the back of your head at the constant pleasure, he fucks you even harder thrust filled with passion. You were on the brink of letting out a scream of pleasure, stopping you from doing so you leaned and sink your teeth into his shoulder.

You can feel your stomach tighten when you felt a strong deep pleasure within. A surge ready to be released.

"Cum for me, just let go." He reaches his hand down and plays with your clit. You let out a mixture of a whimper and sob, your back arching, legs still, eyes fluttering, and jaw slack. The feeling you're experiencing felt otherworldly, it has you in disbelief. He fucks you through it nicely with slowed thrusts before pulling out, your left leg slips off his shoulder and lies limp.

"Oh my god." You breathed out placing a hand on your temple as you try to find your train of thought. He quite literally fucked you stupid.

"You still with me?" He a smile titling at the corner of his mouth. A hum in response is all he got. Once you have officially recovered, he orders you to lie on your side. Confused, you turn to the right facing the direction you were in earlier. As Joe kneels in between your legs, he straddles your right thigh and lifts your left leg to curl around his left hip. Almost before you can process the position, he enters you and starts to devour you.

Your tits bounces rapidly at his merciless hips slam into you over and over again. It wasn't long before they're being groped by Joe who pants heavily above you, a low moan coming from him occasionally.

He hovers over your quivering body with a bruising grip on your hips. His pace is sharp, quick, and so deep you felt dizzy with never ending pleasure as your sensitive body takes in everything that he's giving to you.

"J—mhgh" You couldn't fathom any coherent words as you began to feel overstimulated. This position he has you in makes you feel like you're being fucked beyond your limits.

Joe notices your hands blindly searching for anything to cling to and releases your breasts from his hold. His hands completely engulfs yours as he laces them back together place them on either side of your head.

A couple more thrusts followed and you've approached your second orgasm. Way more intense than the first , so intense you've made a mess on Joe's lower stomach matting down his happy trail and coating the both of you with your essence.

"Shit," He grunts out feeling the aftermath of your orgasm, pace becoming sloppy as he's rapidly approaching his release. He pulls out abruptly ready to fist his soaking cock when you stopped him.

"I wanna do it." You said sitting up he was still straddling your leg as you reach down to stroke him.

"Fuck fuck fuck" He chants, head leaning forward to rest against your shoulder. He moans your name as his release hits, lips connecting with yours when he's spilling multiple spurts on your hand and even on your chest.

With a sigh you both shared a lazy kiss before plopping down next to each other. There is a moment of contentment instilled in your heart during this time, and you remain there for a moment. Enjoying the presence of the man who just took you into a different realm. It wasn't long before the moisture and stickiness on your skin became a discomfort.

Taking a deep breath you slowly eased out of bed. When your feet planted on the floor your legs buckles slightly.

You hear Joe chuckle in amusement. "Take it easy, huh? Where you going?"

"Shut up, I'm headed to the shower." You blushed holding on to the bed post.

He stands up and walks over to you with a glint in his eye. "I take it you got room for one more?"

Taglist:

@luvjoe9 @idyllicbarb @lonelywiththestars @balanceingrace @maricciardo @joeburreauxsworld @tigertales9 @clumsyjoeb @certifiedlesbianbaddie @cherry2stems

If you want to be apart of the taglist dm me babes!

[cait-sith]

Day 12: Core

[xxplastic-cubexx]

oh noooo or whatever

bonus aka The Real Motive Behind This:

SURPRISE double bonus. textless ver of the first pic under the cut

[choism]

OH MY FUCKING GOD

mists of celeste ➻ 40

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, smut ➻ word count: 22.8k (this will crash ur phone so pls read on desktop) ➻ rating: M ➻ warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba chapter specific warnings: violence, blood/injury, choking, brief depiction of a panic attack ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

⇐ previous | next ⇒ | masterlist

✧✧✧ act five ➻ part seven

The stench in the air is some cross between smoke and rotting food. It’s enough to make your nose wrinkle in disgust, something you’ve done several times over the past twenty minutes since getting here, but Hongjoong is still sitting beside you and tinkering with his wristband in the same position he’s been in since arriving. A chain-link fence and a row of boxes are all that separate you from your target — the military complex in the Upper Echelon just as Jisung detailed to Hongjoong the day before. It’s closer to the thickest parts of the Smokehouses in the lower area, which is no doubt what’s causing the smell and, in turn, your misery.

“The outside security is a combination of motion sensors, cameras, and guards,” Hongjoong notes, not looking up from his forearm. “Keep monitoring the guards’ patterns for now while we wait. My techie here in Lynder is working on hacking their surveillance systems remotely.”

Keep reading

[critter-wizard]

ep 43 had me tearing up in a fucking shopping centre ‼️‼️

b+w alt version that I truly couldn't decide if I liked it more . Also I included a lot of thoughts in the tags but they're somewhat incoherent<3

[sophios-draws]

"Oh? You're approaching me?"

celeste memes i made a few years back lmao

[hai7ani]

i genuinely think messing w rindou would be so fun. u tell him one sunday morning while lazing in bed that u think for your wedding ur gonna do this and that and he's SO FOCUSED he immediately put down his phone to ask "can we do this and that too" and u stare at him and go "who's we" UR LOOKING AT HIM FUNNY TOO like he's gonna be the groom at ur wedding or something

stares dumbly at ur back as u leave the room while calling someone and he's just sitting in bed, hair messy, throat dry asf, and he just goes "...what? 😭"

[nobodymitskigabriel]

So the thing about Gabe to me is that he doesn’t quite fit in the categorically of Angel Who Is Eventually Humanized the way that Castiel or Anna do. He is more down to earth than the other angels but specifically in the way that GODS are, not humans. Like, even if he's not literally Loki, Gabriel is functionally an earthen deity for the millenia he spent dicking around and killing people. Other gods are literally the crowd he runs in, and he's an asshole because gods are assholes (and he specifically decided to be one of the more extreme asshole gods). Even though his sensibilities can be very human-like, even if he generally likes humans and wants them to stick around, there was always some level of divinity to his cruelty. So even if he did ultimately choose humanity I feel like putting him in with the angels who actually know what it's like to be human misses this part of his character.

[arealtrashact]

Ignore my previous post. My favorite character isn't Homelander anymore - it's this guy.

I'm so serious.

I've rewatched this scene about a dozen times now simply because I get a kick out of seeing 'Homelander' moving so freely / fluidly. Don't get me wrong, I love how composed the real Homelander is (almost) all the time. Hands behind his back, sometimes on his hips if he's feeling really sassy. . .

But I tend to draw him in some very exaggerated poses ( flaunting some pretty out-there color palettes ) so getting to see an iteration of him moving so animatedly while wearing this delighted me on what can only be described as a primal level.

[amelia-yap]

AUEGH

[thyming]

I think napping here would fix me a little. 🌙☁️

[johnbly]

As field agents, to them, headquarters was like a refuge or even home—the sanctuary they returned to after the job. - on the way to a smile

[pnfc]

i haint watched the dang chibisode and idk if ill actually watch it with sound on sdfjk but i have a hurt feeling about them casually imbuing perry with speech for a one off gag because the idea that he needs to talk to communicate is fake. we had 4 seasons of wacky magic hijinks cartoon where perry never needed verbal speech to communicate. they couldve done this gag at any point in the show but they didn't, and the fact that they didn't felt significant. perry's muteness is such a core part of his character, to me, to the way i conceive of him/write him. i don't wanna overreact to a goofy little side cartoon (even tho i'm doing it anyway) but it's still the characters, and it still upsets me! ok that's it i've said my piece

[twinstxrs]

the gorgug-porter conversation is interesting to me because like. yea for the overwhelming majority of the conversation porter’s being shitty & trying to fit gorgug into a box that gorgug just does not fit into by trying to make gorgug’s relationship with his rage more focused on the aggression aspect of it. but then there’s also this specific thing that brennan brought up again in the ap, which is that gorgug’s relationship with his rage is wholly “this is a tool i use to protect my friends.” which isn’t a bad thing! but that’s his Whole relationship with it, & gorgug seems to place next to no value on his rage in relationship to himself. which is problematic, because it’s first & foremost his rage.

being raised in a household with a sort of toxic positivity largely meant that, whether or not it was his parents’ intention, gorgug internalized the message that more traditionally “negative” emotions such as anger are the wrong response to something. part of the reason he prioritizes his artificing is probably because it’s “fixing” things. in comparison to being a barbarian, which gorgug associates with “breaking” things. good vs. bad behavior, in his eyes.

it’s a totally unacceptable bar to measure a 16 y/o by, but i do think part of porter’s reasoning for not letting gorgug multiclass is him recognizing that gorgug generally does not value anger as a valid emotional response to something, at the very least for himself. & that directly conflicts with what being a barbarian is, because whether you like it or not, that rage is what fuels you. but again, barring a kid from pursuing something they deeply care about in part (not entirely, porter has a lot of more bullshit reasons) because of their fundamental values & world outlook is crazy.

so yes, 98% of porter’s reasoning is pretty shitty, immature, rife with a toxic view that there’s only one proper way to access rage, & generally not a good thing to do as a teacher, but also within that reasoning is the 2% of ‘there is a fundamental part of yourself that you only value if you can use it to take care of other people & you need to accept that as something that can take care of you, too.’ but that’s something to discuss with a therapist or a guidance counselor, not something that should hugely impact gorgug’s academic future.

[uncanny-tranny]

I love you smile lines and worry lines and grey and white hair and wrinkles and purple spiderweb veins and the process of aging and living in a body that is standing the test of times. I love you experiences that make you wiser and stories that make you laugh, and every little process that happens to get to the point where you have so many memories because you have the fortune to be here and be so radiant

[boobgoogler]

trucy i drew 2day............ i like her face in this so extra close up......... ignore if the proportions are off I didn't use any refs </333

also enjoy my jerma clipshow i made w my speed draw.... >:3