#I AM GAY FOR LADY SHAPES

[joffyworld]

GAY GAY SUPER GAY VERY GAY

Jumped on the bunnysuit bandwagon

:3

Tw ! Suggestive humour, rushed phone doodle so not the best quality

So sorry im not learnin how to draw leather or smth for a basically shitpost

[mrfoox]

Me liking girls vs me liking boys is rather diffrent and yeah.......... (':

[odessa-2]

HUBLANDER MELBOURNE ☀️

OK ladies, so I ended up going. Long story short, I was given a spare ticket and decided to seize the moment. It was stinking hot, and a terribly organised event (it was literally in a shed). Despite this, I am glad I did go. My long held observations/beliefs of Sam's character, who he really is as a man, and the fantasy man, single Sam push, were proven correct. I did get a photo with Sam, and I must confess he really is incredibly good-looking. Even better in the flesh. A doll. He's hyper vigilant, astutely aware of his surrounds (eyes darting everywhere) , very polite and gentlemanly and professional.

He looked tanned and fresh and endured hoards of horny grannies fawning over him for hours on end and was attentive to everyone. The organisers of the event stuck Sam, Duncan, Charles and John in a small tin shed that had no air con, that must've been about 50 degrees celsius inside ,where they stood and posed with frenzied women for over 3 hours. They looked visibly overheated (shame on the organisers). Sam didn't faulter. Polite to a tee.

Would you believe that Sam had to use the same toilets as the plebs?! Yep, you heard correctly. Shocking work by the organisers. I actually had to desperately pee at one point but waited until I saw Sam come out of the toilets. In-between panels, the actors were staying upstairs in the loft level, and I saw the uber eats delivery man run upstairs to bring them food. The organisers didn't even feed their guests!

Sam is Jamie to these women and he knows it. Starz knows it. I saw the crazed obsession with my own eyes. I saw how his people; his team have shaped him and moulded him(for his public persona) to appeal to these women and this fantasy notion. They want their Jamie. They want single Sam, and that's what they (starz) give them. There is no room for anything else but Single Sam. And Sam professionally obliges. What he puts out to the public at the conventions is scripted and measured. He is very guarded. I could see it unfold in front of me with great clarity. There were women there who didn't want him with Caitriona (they weren't interested in the Caitriona titbits Sam gave), 50 and 60 year old women who actually think they stand a chance. Tragic. Sam is gorgeous and charming and Starz has used that to sell. And quite frankly, after witnessing this display, I can see why he has a fascade going on. I can see why he would want the public completely removed from his personal life and family. I get it.

Another observation of mine, I know this goes without saying, but he is definitely not gay for those who are insistent. He gives off zero gay vibes. He is not effeminate in the slightest, and I found him to be quite more masculine than I'd imagined. He reads people well and can't keep still. What else can I tell you? He has nice skin, piercing blue eyes (like really crystal blue) and exceptionally tall. He does his job very well and has high emotional intelligence. Starz uses his good looks and they pimp him out to the fan base.

Now don't get me wrong, i met lots of lovely women there today who were sweet and kind and exited. But hearing women's conversations at the event; he really is their fantasy. They were squealing and many saying how they wished they could grab his bum or 💋 him. There's no room for Caitriona. Just fantasy Sam.

Odessa says hi Sam 👋...you were a real trooper.

I'll share some more titbits from the panel tomorrow when my splitting headache hopefully dissipates.

[fanaticsnail]

Boot Worship: Sanji

Birthday Celebration Masterlist

Word count: 3,100+

Themes: Sanji x m!reader, boot worship, angst, established relationship, jealousy, hurt/comfort, love, oral, boot humping, sub Sanji.

Notes: This is my first official Tumblr mlm smut fic! I hope you enjoy Sanji in love like this. This fic is dedicated to @categoryace! Happy birthday, love. Enjoy the cook on your special day 🖤🖤🖤

Another day, another town, another marketplace where your boyfriend put on his best flirtatious and charismatic personality to woo beautiful women into falling for his charms. No matter where you turned, there he was: Black Leg Sanji, waltzing around like a love-sick child, gushing over every pretty lady he witnessed.

“Oh no, madamoiselle, that is not for you. A flower like you deserves something far sweeter,” he coos up at a woman you cared not to truly pay attention to. If it wasn't enough hearing him sing melody's in worship of feminine beauty, the fact that you were a man made the wound all the deeper and tasting more bitter.

You had always known you were gay. All your life, you were attracted to men. Respected women and what they stood for, but they never awoke any feelings of romantic intention or interest from you. Being a gay man in love with a bisexual was sure to have its complexities, especially with one that would flirt with a femininely shaped shrubbery if given the correct alcohol to blood ratio.

Yet, here he was: the love of your life, flirting and cooing at a woman that giggled and swooned at his every quick quip and witty retort.

And you had simply had enough.

With a disgruntled click of your tongue and curl of your upper lip, you slung the satchel full of groceries over Sanji’s shoulder in a huff. He hastily turned his head with his eyes wide with shock, his breath catching, and shoulder slouching beneath the new weight added onto him. Reaching down to catch your hand with his own, you quickly ripped it away from him without sparing him a simple glance.

Turning immediately on your boot heel back towards the tavern where Zoro would likely be either drinking or sleeping, you don't utter a single word to your partner as you briskly walk in the opposite direction.

“Mon amour? Mon amour, wait-!” Sanji’s voice called behind you, but you made no effort to heed to his commands. Jealousy had finally reared its ugly head and you simply couldn't take a further moment of witnessing his infatuation any longer.

Although you heard an exchange of Berry occuring behind you, the jingle of coins spilling and a soft whisper of, “merde,” being an indication that Sanji was finally doing his job appropriately, you couldn't care less to halt your tracks and wait for him to catch up to you. The one thing on your mind was to put as much distance between you and Sanji as you could while getting nearer to the tavern you would be staying in for the evening.

Upon reaching the double-swinging wooden doors, you pushed yourself through the threshold and immediately drew yourself towards the barkeep. Noticing Zoro holding a polite conversation with the man over a bottle of sake, you smiled as politely as you could while seething with rage at them both.

“Something to drink, lad?” The bartender asked you with a friendly ease in his tone, “Sake, rum, I've got some bourbon if you would prefer it?” His eyes held a twinkle that seemed to manage to sate your rage, but you still felt the simmer swirling beneath the surface.

“No, just a room key,” you nod at him, turning then to Zoro and giving him a soft scowl, “You actually managed to do your job, moss, or just sat here drinking all day? I don't have to organise anything for our stay, right?”

“Yeah, yeah, I did my job,” Zoro chuckled, raising his polished ceramic short-glass to his lips and smiled into it, “I'm not just a pretty face.”

“Barely a pretty face at all,” you chuckle in return, nudging your shoulder against his playfully. “Who am I bunking with?”

No sooner than you asked your question did Sanji enter the door with an exhausted huff. Bracing both of his hands on the wooden slats, he panted with his blue shirt a little more unravelled, and his hair deshevled and messy.

“Didn't even have to call the love-cook’s to summon him this time,” Zoro uttered with a roll of his eyes, “You're still seeing him, right?” Zoro offered you the key the barkeeper granted him earlier and you snatched it with your anger once again returning.

“Unfortunately,” you snarl at him. Sanji’s lip quivered, his head down turned and somber while his eyes never left yours.

“Sayin’ I've still got a chance to bunk with you?” Zoro tilted his head, angling his chin up and peering down at you with intrigue, “Could give Luffy your key when he stops eating, and we could enjoy some time together.” You shake your head with a smile pulling on your lips, avoiding his eyes and laughing through your nose.

“Zoro, that's nice and all,” you return your eyes back to him, “But I'm loyal. The cook is my person, and regardless as to how fucking angry I'm feeling right now-.” You heard the doors swing and flutter at the front of the tavern, prompting you to draw your attention back to Sanji, who was struggling to maintain the weight of the amount of stock he's encumbered with.

“...He's still my idiot.”

Giving the swordsman a nod of your head to bid your farewell, you turn to the barkeeper and offer him the same. Sanji stumbled over his lanky legs while attempting to reach you, but you paid him little mind. Walking up the stairs behind the bar, you couldn't ignore the jab Zoro offered your partner while you left.

“Keep it up, Curly,” Zoro chuckled, pouring himself another cupful of sake and gesturing for another bottle, “You’re one fuck-up away from being put in the dog house, and me let into the main mansion.”

“You're not even fucking housebroken, Mosshead!” Sanji growled in response, dropping the supplies at his feet and butting his forehead against the swordsman. “You stay away from my boyfriend, you got that? Do I need to say it louder to get it through your thick head?”

Scoffing, you continued to walk up the stairs to your allocated room and snarled at the lock. Quickly slotting your key into the lock, you turned and clicked the latch to allow you entry. Stepping within, you closed the door immediately behind you, simply ignoring the hasty thumps of Sanji’s heeled boots hitting the wooden floorboards.

As soon as you closed the door, it was swung wide and messily with your chef angrily panting. Chest heaving, he hastily swept across the room and made to bring his hands up to cup your cheeks and hold you close. Scoffing and shrugging away, you turn to face the window and shake your head at him.

“Mon amour, please,” he sighed, his voice coming out with a small hitched crackle, “You know I just play. Women are my weakness, please.” He made to lace his fingers with yours, only resulting in you flinching and recoiling from his touch.

“I would never act on anything,” he whispered softly, trying again to obtain your eyes and ease your mind, “You’re my one and only.” He softly pinched the sleeve of your shirt in the corner of your elbow join, rolling it between his thumb and index finger.

“Cook,” you utter gruffly, feeling the emotions once again rise in your chest and choke your heart swelling in your throat.

“Mon cœur,” he responded in a soft whisper. He slowly pressed his lips to your shoulder, barely caressing the material with a soft kiss. Moving to press his chest flush with your back, you moved once more to shrug him off, only to find his insistence waiting to sate your rage.

“Please,” he breathed his soft plea out, his eyes half-lidded and full of sorrow, “Please, I'm sorry. I know I can be unhinged, but I promise, I'm yours.” He pressed his lips against your neck, tasting your pulse with his intense promise.

“You don't know how long I loved you for, Sanji,” you utter, fluttering your eyes closed and gulping back your emotions. Your Adams apple bobbed as Sanji’s lips found the soft curve beneath your jaw that brings weakness to your knees.

“I do,” he whined against you, “And I know it took me longer to admit my own feelings for you, but I-...” Sanji felt his eyes eyes well up, overcome with the need to express his heart and carve it into your memory.

“Mon amour, I love you,” he confessed, finally surging forward with his brows furrowed and pressing his forehead flush with yours with a sob sniffling out with his emotional expression. “The very air I breathe in your presence is enough to fuel me for a century,” he pressed his lips to the corner of your own to stamp it in solidarity.

“Is that so?” You feel your smile tug at the corner of your lips, finally returning to you with each soft kiss and whisper from your lover.

“Yes,” he breathily confessed against your skin, moving his hands beneath the tail of shirt tucked into your pants. Drawing up his hand, he caresses your stomach before moving up to your pectorals, “I love you. I worship the very ground you walk on.”

He pressed his crotch against yours, his cock brushing against the bone pressing out at your hip. Continuing to move up and caress your skin with his hands, he gently thumbs over your pebbled nipples while his lips and teeth suck and bite at your skin. Rocking his hips against yours, you feel need begin to twitch in your briefs and swell your shaft with a wave of arousal.

“The ground I walk on,” you chuckle, eyes fluttered shut and enjoying the dance his fingers displayed against your skin, “Or the boots that carry me there?” Sanji chuckled against your neck, nibbling at your pulse before pulling away to meet your eyes with his own.

“They are really good-looking boots,” he complimented you, shifting his eyes lovingly down at your shoes while unbuttoning your shirt. “I have always adored your boots, mon amour.” He popped several more buttons, his hands now lingering at your collar. “I would kiss them, if you'd let me. Would that be enough of an apology for my abraisiveness and incompetence earlier?”

“Sanji,” you roll your eyes before an idea springs to the forefront of your mind, “The only way I'm going to offer you forgiveness, is if you drop to your knees and fuck them at this stage.” Sanji halted his quivering fingers at your collar, tugging firmly on the final button while his eyes spring wide in shock.

While Sanji remained frozen, movement below his belt shocked you more than he seemed to demonstrate on his face. Sanji’s cock was as solid as a steel polearm, dampening his suit-pants with a large patch of arousal seeping through his cockhead.

“You…” you began, attempting to catch yourself and Sanji back in the moment. Sanji’s face swelled with a vibrant shade of red, his nose beginning to expel a small stream of blood as he attempted to maintain composure. “Oh, Sanji…”

The cook shook his head, attempting to catch himself and deny what his body reacted to immediatly. Refusing to allow this moment to shift from you, you immediately thrust your hand below his waistline and girdled his cock with a firm grip.

“Sanji, get on your knees,” you whisper into his ear, his breath hitching immediately to your order, “And take off your pants and briefs on the way down.”

“Mon amour-,” he attempted to halt you, but you spoke above him.

“-This is the only way I'll forgive you, cook,” you quip softly, your sinister smirk rising in the corners of your mouth, “Pants off, and you're going to grind on my boots until you cum.”

“Oh, fuck,” he whimpered, immediately reaching for his belt buckle and hastily removing his pants from his hips with a soft shimmy. You removed your hand from his extremely hard cock, watching as he shrugged his own blue-shirt hastily from his shoulders. Popping each button clumsily, Sanji messily crumpled his dress shirt on the floor at the same time that you nearly removed yours.

“All naked, hm? Feeling exposed?” you quipped at him, collecting his whiskered chin beneath your hand and bringing his lips an eyelashes’ length away from connecting to your own, “On your knees, Sanji.”

Sanji dropped carelessly to his knees, one falling on each side of your boot. Stradling your foot, his throbbing and desperate cock brushed it's frenulum against the material and twitched immediately upon impact. His hands moved up to your belt, softly popping the crotch and moving to remove your own cock from within your pants.

“And just what do you think you are doing, my heart?” you arch your brow up at him, teasing as you look down your nose towards the blonde at your feet. “Something you need-?”

“-Let me suck your cock,” his demand fled his lips while his fingers continued to move quickly below your belt, “Give it to me, I need to please you. I need to show you how much you mean to me.” You gently reach down and cup his cheek, checking in with his expression as his eyes swelled black with lust.

“I just want you,” he whimpered, slowly drawing your cock out of your pants and giving it a few pumps to test your resolve. At each roll of your velvety shaft behind his circular grip, he bucked his hips against your boot. Already sobbing, Sanji whimpered as his cock began to leak sticky pears of precum onto your shoes.

“Because you asked so nicely,” you smile down at him, guiding his face towards your cock. He obediently parted his lips and swirled his tongue over your tip, feeling his oral frenulum piercing make contact against your sensitive head.

Breath hitching in your throat, Sanji began to bob his head and taking half your length into his throat while bucking against your boot. Rolling his hips, he desperately whimpered and sobbed at the sensation of his overly sensitive and pulsating shaft making contact with his lover’s shoe.

Everything about Sanji’s mouth was talented and hot. From his quick wit, to his sensitive palate, to his romantic and emotional kisses, to the way his lips formed that perfect ring around your shaft. You began to buck in time with his own crude grinding, feeling yourself grow closer to your release the longer he moaned and cried against you.

Sanji’s arms circled your thigh as he swallowed around your cock, taking in your entire length with his nose brushing against the base of your stomach. Drawing your hand up to Sanji's head, you pushed his bangs back and gripped onto his golden locks while he humped your boot with renewed vigor. You could see several strings of his precum dampening your shoe with his desire, his whines and sputters choking on your cock all informing you how close he was to cumming.

“You gonna cum, my heart?” you coo down at him, attempting to ignore the way your voice comes as more of a whine than the dominant way you wanted it to. Sanji nodded, choking and drooling messily on your cock while his hips began to become desperate and unsyncopated.

“Mmmphgh-!” Sanji warned you, swallowing and desperately choking himself on your cock while his cock began to release a large stream of pearlescent cum against your boot. Several waves of uncoiling ropes dampened your boot while few spurs seeped onto your pants.

Sanji's moans and choked sobs vibrated against your cock, your own release beginning to swell in your abdomen. While Sanji’s hips stuttered, he chose to focus completely on chasing your release by lulling his tongue and fucking your cock with his face.

Just as Sanji’s release finished, yours began. Sanji looked up at you through his blonde lashes, eyes rolling as you painted the insides of his throat with hot splashes of your viscous release. He hollowed his cheeks and swallowed around your shaft, allowing you to guide his head to ride through your high.

“S-Sanji, fuck-! I-I’m cumming. Oh mmmghhh- fuck!” With your hands in his hair, you fucked his mouth with a few heavy thrusts while groaning out his name. You released his hair and slipped your hand down to cup his cheek, gazing down at him with nothing but love on your face.

As you finished, you felt your oversensitive and deflating cock shudder between his lips, prompting the love-cook to give you one more playful pump with his lips before pulling away.

Tilting his head up, he lulls his tongue out to demonstrate the absence of your cum on his palate, swallowing your hot load while your boot was covered in his.

“Am I forgiven, then?” Sanji asked, lulling his tongue back inside his lips and gazing up at you as if you were the embodiment of mercy. Aiding him to his feet on wobbly legs, you press your forehead against his and circle your arms over his bare shoulders with a soft nod.

Catching your hips with his hands, he rakes the skin of your lower back within his hands and breathes in your air with his brows furrowed in passion and concentration.

“I love you, mon amour,” he whispered more intimately than the moment you just shared together, “I will do better by you. I promise, I will.”

“I know, my heart,” you return his whisper in a tone just as filled with passionate intimacy. “You can't help what's a part of you, but it does make me jealous from time to time.” Sanji smiled somberly, gently tilting his head up to press his lips to the center of your forehead.

“Any time you get jealous of me flirting with a woman,” Sanji uttered with resolve against your skin, pulling away only to gaze into your eyes, “I will let you do anything you want to me. Anything in the world. Take it out on me in any way you truly desire. I'll do anything.” You chuckled, prompting him to do the same.

His eyes crincled in the corners of his face, and you saw your entire world in that soft smile you shared with him.

“I'll hold you to that,” you nod at him, gently drawing his lips towards yours.

“You can hold me against anything, mon amour,” he laughed breathily while drawing his lips ever nearer, “All I ask is you stay with me, despite my flaws.”

“And you with me despite mine,” you whisper in reaponse, finally claiming your lover’s lips beneath your own in a passionate exchange of hardened resolution. You sealed your promise to one another in that heated kiss, allowing Sanji to lead you towards the bed behind you and pushing gently against your chest to lay you both down against the mattress.

Sanji was your partner, a man you would see yourself standing side by side against any enemy Luffy needed to face to achieve his goals. He was your person, and despite his constant flirting with women: his heart, mind, body, and soul was pledged to you in that very moment.

Tag list: @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training @since-im-already-here @gingernut1314 @writingmysanity @i-am-vita @indydonuts @feral-artistry @the-light-of-star @empirenowmp3 @racfoam @sunflowersatori @carrotsunshine @skullfacedlady @jintaka-hane @thenotsofantasticlifestory @jadeddangel

🎶"Happy Birthday to Me"🎶

If you would like to celebrate by indulging my caffeine and bubble tea addiction, my Kofi link is here.

[kanagenwrites]

Hey folks. My name is Kanagen (It's pronounced Ka-na-ngen. Kana is fine.), and I'm a writer. I mostly write sci-fi with a more or less sapphic bent, and I'm not shy about putting lewd content in what I write because fuck petty moralism.

I'm active in the Human Domestication Guide writing community, where apart from being an author (see below), I'm also a Loret, which means I help maintain and update the lore of the setting, help new creators with questions about it or how to fit a story into it, and so on. All of my publicly available fiction at the moment is HDG content, but I plan on working more on my own original settings and concepts in the future.

I have a patreon, where I post my current long-form project's drafts chapter by chapter, once weekly. I also occasionally talk about my writing process. I'm hoping to expand content there in the future as well.

I don't use social media very much because I remember what the internet used to be like before walled gardens and techbros ruined it. (You kids really don't know what you're missing.) Nevertheless, the life of a freelance writer rather demands I put myself out there somehow, so here I am. Ask me questions, behold the weird stuff I reblog, and try not to get too parasocial with me. I'm just a weird lady who puts words in funny shapes.

Bibliography

Long-Form Fiction

No Gods, No Masters - A revolutionary leftist copes with the subtle differences between her own idea of the perfect world and the just-a-little-off version of it the Affini offer. First novel-length work in the Tillandsia Trilogy; highly suggested you read this before The Floret in the Mirror and especially Freedom's Ember.

The Floret in the Mirror - A mystery/thriller about identity, digitization, and impossible simulated lewdness. Content warning for amnesia resulting from traumatic brain injury as part of the setup. Sequel to No Gods, No Masters.

Freedom's Ember (ongoing) - Sixty years after the Affini conquered her world, a woman clings to her independence; sixty years after being frozen for cryogenic flight from the Affini, a woman struggles to discover who she really is when freed from her father's influence. What is freedom, and what does it mean in the context of the Compact? Sequel to No Gods, No Masters and The Floret in the Mirror, conclusion of the Tillandsia Trilogy.

Sui Generis - A martian attorney living on Earth finds adjusting to life with the Affini easier than most; she was already keeping her wife as a pet before they arrived. The real question is, where's that strange jealousy coming from?

Short Fiction

Mainspring - A Terran secret agent is captured by the Affini, trapped by artist for whom his body is a canvas, and she means to make of him her magnum opus. Wind-up doll content, and probably my most commonly cited story for "this rewired my brain"-style reactions.

Reading the Leaves - A tea-obsessed barista, an affini new to humanity, and a sweet (if awkward) romance culminating in a very raunchy ending. Entry for the HDG February Fluff Fic Jam 2024.

The Fifth Fundamental Force - This story is a silly joke. It should not be taken seriously, though many inevitably do.

Aftertaste (stalled) - A former quadrillionaire and epicure who just barely avoided domestication is tracked down by an affini culinary anthropologist who wants to use his brain to reconstruct a lost flavor using his long-buried memory - he was the last human to ever taste bluefin tuna. This fic is only sporadically updated because the stars must precisely align for my brain to be in a state to write boyliker fic. Sorry, I'm just really gay, y'all.

[ondeemand]

Transformers One Review

For the sake of convenience, I’ll be referring to the characters as their new names (Optimus Prime, Megatron, Bumblebee) instead of their old ones (Orion Pax, D-16, B-127).

Also, I didn��t grow up with Transformers, so this will be mostly from an outsider’s perspective. I can’t tell what possibly was or wasn’t a retcon or how accurate to the source material it was, but I think the background info on their world held up very well and they were able to explain it clearly to new viewers like me. It definitely would have hit harder if I grew up with Transformers and knew more than just facts from cultural osmosis, but I still enjoyed the movie a lot.

Notes/Things I’m Neutral On

Very weird to hear my name (Dee) being said throughout most of the movie by Chris Hemsworth’s bad American accent.

Also, I forgot that Megatron has transformed into ground vehicles before. I only ever knew him to turn into a jet, so I was kind of confused that he was a tank in this movie. I hope we get to see him get upgraded to a jet in the next one, but the tank is still cool.

Pros/Things I Liked

Simple but effective color theory with their eye colors. Main good guys have blue while Megatron has yellow, sitting between good and bad. Still a friendly color at first, but slowly turns closer to orange and then fully red as his anger and hatred consume him (and after he met the red-eyed Starscream, a cowardly man who ends up enabling Megatron‘s more violent/aggressive tendencies)

○ Also I don’t know if I was just seeing things, but it looked like Megatron’s eyes got more yellow whenever he looked at Optimus which is so sad and so gay.

I really thought they were gonna push a romance between Elita and either Bumblebee (goofy manchild x competent woman trope) or Optimus (male lead x female lead, blue x pink), but I was pleasantly surprised that they didn’t. Sadly, there’s still time for it in future installments, but I can dream.

Not to be gay, but spider woman sexy. Airachnid was so obviously evil that it was funny, but I can’t fault Sentinel for having her around because I, too, would want a deadly goth woman to be my right-hand lady. They felt like the evil, less developed versions of Mustang and Hawkeye. I am in love.

The animation is gorgeousssss. The environments, the character designs, the fight choreography, the transformations, the lighting, the texture, mwah mwah MWAH STUNNING!!!

○ Sorry, I’m never gonna stop talking about this. The way they were able to make square/blocky figures move so fluidly was fantastic (and proof of concept that a fully animated Minecraft movie would have worked). ○ The camera angles were also great for framing both the dramatic, intense, and/or high-action moments like fights or chase scenes, while also adding a lot to the comedic moments. Like when the camera stays tracking Optimus’ face when running through the forest, only for him to suddenly fall down a cliff neither he nor us saw coming, only to then zoom out to the perspective of the guards below, showing them stumbling and falling. ○ The contrast between the mechanical and organic elements on the surface were really cool, and the way it was introduced was able to convey this idea that organic life was this strange, alien thing. ○ The way the surface just rebuilds itself into these jagged, blocky terrains was really unique and interesting! It felt like a glitched computer model because of its rougher shapes which really added to the fear and hostility of the surface.

90% of their jokes landed and they landed hard. The bit where Optimus looks like he’s about to transform and then just fucking books it is incredible. The audio and camera work help add to these as well, like the music building as Optimus pretends to transform, the camera zooming in close to different parts of him, only for all background noise to cut out as it shows Optimus running away. I won’t name every joke and quip I found funny or we’d be here all day, but they’re certainly a highlight of the movie.

I love Keegan-Michael Key, but I wasn’t a fan of him as the comic relief character of Toad in the Mario movie. When Bumblebee showed up I got a little nervous, but I really loved his performance of the character.

I really liked the midpoint pep talk about hope. That’s a really nice reason that Optimus is the leader despite not being as skilled as other people. He has the hope for a better future and it was a core part of his character from the beginning, and I really like the idea that a leader is someone who can envision a brighter future no matter what.

Alpha Trion transforming was SICK AS FUCK!!! I love that he was more animalistic when the rest of the cast become vehicles. His final fight was so cool, and it actually made me kind of emotional to see him at the end with the rest of the Prime ghosts.

The stabbings? The beheadings?? The branding??? The way Megatron tore Sentinel in half and then ripped his heart out on-screen holy shit???? This movie was incredibly brutal and I loved it. It’s such an interesting phenomenon that children’s media is allowed to be about as graphic as they want as long as it’s against robots, even incredibly sentient ones like in the Transformers series.

○ I watched the 1986 Transformers movie for a class earlier this year, and while it also had a lot of brutality in it’s fights, the new movie felt more intense. Part of this could be attributed to me watching the 2024 movie on a big screen vs the 1986 movie in my living room, but there are other reasons as well. The 1986 movie had more upbeat songs playing over the fights, specifically songs like The Touch and Dare, which helped keep the tone lighter and more exciting. The 2024 movie didn’t have anything like that, allowing the action, while still cool and exciting, to take on a more serious tone. This is also emphasized by the graphics of the movie being 3D instead of 2D. While the 2D 1986 movie is a stunning masterpiece, people still view it with the idea in mind that, since it’s a cartoon, the stakes and story will be less intense. The 2024 movie being 3D with very detailed graphics and lighting already has more visual intensity. The characters are still these bright, poppy colors, but they can come across more moody and dark due to the environments, lighting, and textures that the 3D medium more easily allows. And while the painted backgrounds and cell shading of the old movie are great, the CGI backgrounds are a lot closer to realism, so the harsher elements like metal and rock, which make up a vast majority of the environment and characters, look real too.

The way Megatron’s hate consumed him to the point where he started acting more villainous and, while not entirely similar to Sentinel, still ended up hurting innocent people was tragic. Trying to push away and deny everything about a person only to wind up being just like them. This was perfectly shown in the end credit scene where Megatron is branding himself and the new Decepticons with Megatronus Prime’s face. To him, it may be him reclaiming the traumatic experience and literally using it like a badge of honor, as well as thinking he’s honoring Megatronus Prime. But in reality, he’s just inflicting the same trauma done to him onto others, just like Sentinel. Such a cool way to show how every villain is the hero of their own story.

The doomed yaoiiiiii I’m never gonna get over them. The only other Transformers media I’ve consumed is the 1986 movie, which kills off Optimus Prime in the first 25 minutes and Megatron becomes Galvatron, so I never knew the depths of their homoerotic relationship.

I’m a sucker for “the hero and villain used the be friends (and maybe even lovers?)” trope, so Optimus and Megatron’s relationship and the general premise of the movie was already a slam dunk for me.

I’m also a fan of legacy stories like Avatar and She-Ra. While this movie didn’t get as in-depth with the concept, I enjoyed that they played with the idea of legacy and taking up the mantle of the former Primes.

I absolutely loved the end message that Optimus gives us. Hope, freedom, and autonomy are incredibly important things to learn, and as a trans person who very much wants to keep control over what I do with my body, I really resonated with that last one. I think it’s really cool that they included a message like that in this children’s movie about robots that turn into cars.

Regarding the message of autonomy, I love that it gives the term Autobots a new meaning. Auto meaning “automobile”, since they transform into cars, and Auto meaning “self”, as they are now fully their own bots with control over themselves.

Cons/Things I Disliked

Mid vocal performances from everyone except Brian Tyree Henry and Keegan-Michael Key. And as I mentioned before, it was hard not to focus on Chris’ attempts at an American accent, not to mention how recognizable his, as well as Scarlett Johansson’s, voices are.

The plot felt a little disjointed in the first 1/3-ish.

○ Good setup with the main characters being an oppressed working class with one dreaming of better things and the other hesitant to fall out of line or take risks. But then suddenly there’s a race, and then they’re in it, and then they lose, and then their leader wants to promote them. At first it feels like there are hints that he’s a scummy celebrity-type and that meeting their hero is what will spur on the disillusionment with their society. But then some random douchebag that doesn’t like them reassigns them which goes against their leader’s command, and that’s how the plot kicks off? ○ Also, Elita’s involvement felt kind of rushed/hand-waved. They all get stuck on the surface, but instead of trying to make her way back to report them like she was saying she would for the past few minutes, she makes a complete 180 and heads the expedition herself. ○ It all just felt a little strange, but once it got going the rest of the plot felt fine.

Megatron’s descent into “evil” felt kind of rushed. I understand that he feels betrayed and I really love where the character ends up by the end, but it felt like a real 180 without a lot of build up.

Some jokes fell flat or felt annoying and kinda cringe. That’s the territory of children’s movies though, so par for the course.

TLDR

Overall, this movie was a really fun watch and I’d love to go see it again. While some parts fall a little flat, the movie is lifted from mediocrity by its many Pros. From the stunning visuals, to the quick humor, to the tragic origins of two friends driven apart by their ideals, I’d recommend this movie to anyone interested in animation or the Transformers brand.

8.82/10

[lurkingshan]

10 Things I Love About Ossan's Love Returns

Y’all. Y'ALL. I am stunned right now. I am verklempt. I never thought I would end up here. But here I am.

I bounced hard off the original Ossan's Love. Like, hard. I DNF'd and immediately memory holed just about everything I knew about it. But people I trust (namely @isaksbestpillow and @twig-tea) said this new series was an improvement on the original, and that I didn't have to go back and try rewatching the first series to dive into this one. So of course I, a jbl devotee, had to give it the old college try.

AND TO MY SHOCK AND AWE, I LOVE IT. This show is excellent. This is Japanese media at its absolute best, showcasing the precision in writing, directing, editing, and acting that they can reach when they are firing on all cylinders. This is the kind of comedy only a Japanese production can get right, because it requires a mastery of all these elements that you just can't get in less mature filmmaking industries. This is the best example I have ever seen of this kind of broad comedic style grounded in real stakes.

So let me tell you why this show, which is available for the international audience on Gaga (and with subs coming from Sirii, as well!), is worth your time:

This is a story about an established relationship between adult characters. Y'all know how I feel about the dearth of this we get in drama! Maki and Haruta have been long distance for four years and are moving in together to start their married life as this show begins.

The writing is unbelievably strong. Everything that happens matters, the characters always make sense, and the jokes are genuinely so fucking funny.

Kurosawa, or Chief, as I refer to him, is one of the funniest characters of all time, in any drama. The way this man had me laughing out loud in every scene! I felt like I got a workout.

This show is a feat of editing. I have been watching a string of shows recently that are getting hamstrung by bad editing, so let me tell you, it was a true pleasure to watch a drama that executes editing tricks so deftly and with such an eye toward sharpening its story and enhancing its jokes.

It has excellent female side characters. We have Chizu, my favorite lady bestie who is here to whip Haruta into shape at all times, and Chuoko, an actual archer who also has her own little romance going, and Haruta's mom, an unbothered legend who just wants to eat her food and get to her dates with her boyfriend.

There's a mystery! Next door to Haruta and Maki are two creepy mfers (brothers?) who are Up To Something. Or not! I don't know but I’ll find out!

We are getting an actual dialogue about gay marriage. Haruta and Maki consider themselves married, but have no legally binding contract and have not yet had a wedding, and they talk about this and their feelings about it often as they are negotiating their lives together.

We may have some aroace rep happening?? This is still pending but my radar is pinging hard for Takegawa to join the incredibly shortlist of explicitly aro and/or ace characters in bl.

DID I MENTION THIS SHOW IS FUCKING HILARIOUS. I cannot overstate the number of times this drama had me straight cackling in three short episodes. I had to get up and do some laps to walk it off.

The show is extremely well paced and I trust it not to waste my time. No small thing in these bl streets! The odd episode order (9) and tight pacing of each of the first three episodes tells me the creators of this show know exactly what they are doing and how much time they need to execute their vision.

This show is airing live for the next six weeks and I strongly encourage you to watch it and come join the fun with us!

[allykatsart]

Hearts

Spades Clubs Hearts(Here) Diamonds

All these women are hot, some quite literally, and I am very gay for them! Anyway, hearts are all about emotion, love, and passion right? I feel like these ladies are very fitting of those roles! Though, I will admit, I don't have everything figured out about them just yet!

Click Here (to commission) Hot Ladies

April ~ King of Hearts

April's dealt with a lot of her life, but she's actually in a pretty good place nowadays! She works in a bakery/cafe and is a damn fine cook with her fire magic. Yes, despite the cottage core aesthetic, she has an affinity for fire!

April is a fairy who comes from the magic realm! (This is also where dragons reside without a Tether) However, she left and in a hurry, trying to get away from something in her past. When she came to the Material realm, she was homeless for a time. She goes back to the shelter that helped get her out of that situation often, and makes food for them.

April still deals with low self esteem, despite her internal and external beauty. She's got a bit of a crush on Cat, but romance takes a while for her. And she's also got her own demons to face.... But maybe she won't have to face them alone.

FireFox ~ Queen of Hearts

Once again, another character without a name. I'll call her FireFox for now lol. Anyways, she is what April is running from, but I'm not too sure on the rest. She's a villain, just look at her, but I don't know her motives or anything just yet but I have figured out a few things.

Firstly, she's a shape shift and often is mistaken for a kitsune. I don't know if she is one, but she's certainly not human. Secondly, she comes from a small town in the Winter kingdom, one revered for its fire mages. She may be one of the best fire mages around. Thirdly, she has some connection with the Sun Dragon...

Valentine ~ Jack of Hearts

Valentine was a character I made on a whim! She goes to the same college as Cat, and they eventually end up dating. April is... A bit jealous, but eventually is able to get to know Valentine despite all that.

Valentine, meanwhile, is a vampire! Her side plot explores vampirism as a metaphor for diabetes! There are two types (Born and Turned) and companies will often extort this demographic by hiking up the price of stuff they need to live. Not to mention the rhetoric around vampirism, or how sexualized vampires get, of course.

Despite this, Valentine has a cheery attitude and is actually on the cheerleading team at her school. She's going to become a doctor or politician, something that'll change the world, and other Vampire's lot in life!

[ora-ori]

Lenore’s shot through the head theory.

OKAY. Thank you to that ONE PERSON that asked me for this theory (I love you please don’t leave) because I was literally vibrating trying to hold it in.

For this one, we have one major piece of evidence.

THIS PANEL

So here’s where the theory comes into play. This is from the very first episode, where Annabel gaslight gatekeep girlboss Lee meets Lenore ignore instigate ignite Vandernacht (if I spelled it wrong please correct me) meet each other. This panel is exactly from when Annabel and Lenore first enter the academy.

The question is…

Why is the line through Lenore’s head?

We know that it’s common for art or anything of the kind to have a line resembling a heartbeat around the heart when dealing with a stressful and/or important situation. So why is it through her head? Wouldn’t it be through her heart?

Before I answer that, we have another piece of evidence. When Annabel manifested, the deans and professor maid doll informed the audience that she was a lady in white. This specter is a result of a bride being killed/betrayed on her wedding day. And we also know that Annabel, provided with context clues as well, was shot through the heart on her wedding day. Her cause of death, a heart shaped hole literally in her chest with a red crystal to symbolise her heart if it was there. Lenore also killed her past self (see my previous theory for that explanation) and began a new life as Leo, and use this identity to be with and marry Annabel. We see this intention when Lenore puts the sheet music for Annabel’s song she had requested, and the ring(box).

Lenore had a gun in her suitcase, her belongings when she arrived. BUT I am NOT saying that Lenore killed Annabel, but suggesting that Annabel was assassinated on their wedding day by someone close to them, either causing Lenore to shoot herself through the head out of grief from her dead fiancé, or spending her last moments desperately trying to save Annabel, after she was shot, from bleeding out and dying, then being shot in the head herself by the same person. This would be Lenore’s cause of death, and perhaps her specter may relate to this instead.

This would also have the symbolism of the saying/metaphor that heart and mind go hand in hand. As we see in many many episodes, Lenore mainly acts on impulse and emotion, heart. While Annabel thinks more things through and usually has a plan, mind, however this can be visa versa and switch between the both of them, seeing as they both have a sort of trading in controlling and hiding their emotions. While they are both sorta mentally ill while they were alive, Annabel has the heart while Lenore has the mind. This would trace back to Annabel being shot through the heart, and Lenore being shot through the head. Both of them dying on their wedding day, and living on together in the afterlife and possibly rebirth.

We love some poetic gays.

Lastly, I am not a fast pass user so I do not know what’s going on after the hiatus and I’m crying about have to wait for a month. If I spelled anything differently it’s because I’m australian and use aus english. Again, I love responding to you all, please leave an ask even if it’s just the smallest thing you want me to see. Don’t be afraid, it makes my day. Till we meet again.

[fruitofthelaestrygonians]

Decendants au exept much like in the original hooks from a wealthy and respected family in London and one night they attend a circus performance in the royal Albert hall and morgie is one of the contortionists and he's a shape shifter (gotta love a mix of magic and non magic) kinda like nagini in fantastic beasts exept for the permanence and hooks like hot damn straight away and morgie introduces himself and he's like "good evening lady's and gentle men, my names morgan, and shockingly I'm hear with camelot circus and my last name is inafact le fay, pause for laughter, and my mothers name is atually morgana and she has a brother called arthur, what are the odds, I'm a contortionist and a shape shifter and I am absolutely not used to such delightful quarters, I hope you have a nice evening, hopefully nice enough that you'll come again and spend all your money!" And everyone's laughing but hooks like, absolutely yes I will be and they meet (perhaps hook waits around one night when hes not with his parents and morgie sneeks up on him and is like "hello not-so-stranger, how many shows is this now? 5? 6?" And hooks like "5, but i have tickets for a 6th.. I'm hook, ..james hook, merchant father," and morgies like "fancy, arnt posh toffs like yourself supposed to be followed around by some person making sure you dont blunder or something?" And hooks like "no, im a guy i dont have a chaperone" and morgies like "ah my mistake sir") and get to know each other and morgie shows hook the behind the scenes and how he does everything and how he trains and then they fall in love and kiss and they get to be secret gay weirdos together

[the-white-snake]

Lady Lia | OC smash or pass?

QUICK FACTS

height: 6'9" (nice) / 205 cm

age: between 50-55 years

gender: genderfluid

pronouns: she / they

sexuality: lesbian (with room for one Styr)

PROS

shaped like a capital S with PERFECT GLUTES

extremely wealthy but also good with money

absolutely stunning and smells as nice as she looks

shares her expensive tastes with loved ones

CONS

"What did you just say to me?"

"Remind me again why this concerns me?"

"Why are you talking to me?"

"Understand that I am better than you in every conceivable way."

(SOME) DETAILS

Lia is a bit of a hermit by choice. When she "retired" as a dragoon and decided to clean house as the new matriarch of her clan, she became a bit of a shut in. This lady is just not a fan of people. Like, in general.

She has expensive but very pragmatic tastes. While her manor is sparse in fine art and other cushy decor, she loooves implementing innovative tech into all parts of her home. Ask her about the central heating system she commissioned from Isghard's machinists! She's very proud of it.

She's on the older side and most of Ishgard thinks she's still unwed. Plenty of suitors come knocking thinking Lia might be lonely or desperate for an heir. HAH. Idiots.

Most her wealth comes from her family's salt mines. These mines helped her ancestors secure power and prominence rather quickly after immigrating to Ishgard from the Shroud.

Sexually, Lia is a switch. She gravitates toward being dominant over her many partners, or sharing an equal dynamic. She can be convinced to play the sub, but good luck with that.

Romantically, she is someone who gives fine expensive gifts. This is about the only way she expresses her love, generally. If you happen to be one of her girlfriends or her husband, then physical touch is very on the table. Otherwise, you may as well be approaching an ice wall that melts extremely slowly. Something something Ishgardian temperament? Anyway, engage with at your own risk.

Thanks for tagging me, @hazelkjt!

I tagged some folks on my main already, so I won't drop a bunch of names here. If anyone is interested in trying this out (It's fun!), check out the instructions below ⸺

Rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

[tommyssupercoolblog]

THE SHOW WAS AMAZING OMGGGGGG RAAAUGHGJFHFHFH GOES FERAL AND GNAWS ON MY COMPUTER

ALSO I MADE NEW MUTIALS HI NEW MUTUALS!!!! HEWWO!!!! BAPS YOU WITH MY PAWS

Spoilers under the cut

H-o-t-t-o-g-o, you can take me HOT to goooo

TWINKS ON ICE and "camera flash can be distracting, Phil will fall of the stage and die" absolutely SLAYED me

Dan accidentally said "Dan and pheal" instead of Dan and Phil and they both stopped to pretend to hold the pheal. Dan said that would be a better show than this.

SISTER DANIEL SLAYED

I don't know if this happens at EVERY show but in ours, the audience chose to kill the original Dan and Phil every time

Dan has illegalized ted Cruz but then got arrested for being British. Dr Phil loves helping old ladies cum and his favorite word is skibidi. I don't remember the third facts for either

Even though it wasn't picked, a whole bunch of people around us (and us) started chanting "FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK" when they asked what Dr. Phil's favorite word would be. Later we chanted "TOUR BUS" but that one worked!!!!

One of the audience confessions was that someone likes to "mark their territory" (yes. In the gross way) to know what it's like so sister Daniel called them a bad kitty and they sprayed the audience with water. Also Phil called out that some people had their MOUTHS OPEN while they were being sprayed.

The other audience confessions were that someone wrote "Phantrash(insert some numbers I can't remember)" on a wall in invisible ink and then MOVED OUT OF THW HOUSE AND LEFT IT THERE??? And then a confession that just said "someone in the audience thinks you sound like owls" which they both were confused by at first, but then Dan's face like. LIT UP in recognition and he repeated the question to Phil and Phil said "Who?" And Dan LOST IT and made fun of him. LMAO

They explained their first experience at a bucces. And THEN later phil said that his new favorite nuts are bucces nuts (as revealed later when they were asked by the audience to discuss nuts). Also they hate peanuts and think no one likes them unless they're paid to by "big peanut". And they both like "hot nuts" and Dan likes them salted and Phil likes them sweetened/candied. And yes they made sex jokes about it and also Dan said that Phil's favorite nuts were actually HIS NUTS

Phil having the phitties to the wind was not what I expected

I. Could have SWORN that there was an ...."uninvited guest" in the 🍑 part of the wresting match but no one's posted about it even though the whole theatre was like "AUGH!!" And they cut away and I turned to everyone next to us and was like "!!!! Uh oh was that REAL?? Um-" so. Maybe we were wrong. But I was about to be like "DANIEL HOWELL I AM SO SORRY I HOPE YOUR THERAPIST IS SO GOOD BECAUSE I PERSONALLY WOULD DIE"

Dan wore a cowboy hat during the musical number

I NEED THAT SONG IN MY PLAYLIST AND THAT DANCE MEMORIZED

I MISSED THE FUCKING PHOTO OPP BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T GIVE ME ENOUGH WARNINF TO UNLOCK MY PHONEEEE evil. Evil of them. Dan and Phil you betrayed me personally. Evil. I DID however get them walking aways

I bought the Dan and Phil made me gay shirt

Unrelated to the show itself but someone was handing out worms, and there were SO many sister Daniel cosplayers, and I happened to sit literally right in front of two other systems so it was like. Halfway through the show we realized that's what was happening and it was like HEWWO???? WOAH. Also this was my first time in Austin and guys... guys some sections of these roads are fucking perpendicular. I saw multiple people with mobility aids and like I HAVE ZERO AIDS AND IT HURT TO WALK ARE Y'ALL GOATS??? ARE YOU JUST NOT ABLE TO WALK OUTSIDE AT ALL AND HAVE TO TAKE CARS??? The whole fucking city is a series of V shapes with buildings on it. Girl why do your streets go straight up into the sky are you trying to drive up to jesus. Liked the rentable scooters tho

[menlove]

feels like Paul is just trolling at this point, like come ooon:

getting "homosexual dreams" and then asking "shit, am I gay?" proceed to 'subconsciously' draw phallic shapes in my paintings

"1 in 4 men is gay" - shit, must be me, right?

"everyone must be binary, I am binary" -> okay paul

"this or that?" both!!

let me stare at these penis mushrooms and then gift ales with their imaginary and gay mirror gnomes (totally not me and john) to my friends

smoking weed should be just as legal as practicing homosexuality!! (well then. source - tumblr.com/marthamydearlove/676148289186447360)

"bow down to the plasticine banana", "sweet banana, you've never been done, like a rabbit gonna grab it", "my little lady gets behind" and other phallic and suggestive imaginary in my lyrics (aka linda pegs me cause I mis- [redacted])

I am sure there is more crazy shit I am missing

HOLLERING AT THAT LAST ONE NOT LINDA'S PLASTICINE BANANA. GOOD FUCKING BYEEEEEE

he's just whshsjshs the thing is he carries himself like a queer man and I do firmly think it's bc he is & is just out amongst friends bc like. cmon.

[acting-pterygii]

crazy things are being cooked up in the hamlet, prince of denmark discord server right now…

last year we subjected our characters to the hell of the Hunger Games— and this year, we’re putting them through hell again! although, hopefully murder-less. Welcome to Bards High, the official hamserver summer 2024 roleplay. where we take our favorite little guys (including a certain childrens’ cartoon icon??) and force them to go through the highs and lows of the American Educational System! no, i have no idea why it’s in america. we unanimously decided, i suppose (freedom democracy oil 🇺🇸🦅🔥) it’s shaping up to have so much fluff, suspense, good banter, gay pining, not-gay pining, missing parents, dead squirrels, and DRAMA already, and i can’t wait to see what WILD things we come up with this time around.

although, i may have gotten a little ahead of myself with the “no murder” part. this is a shakespeare-themed rp, after all…

more of the cast + bonus art below the cut!

@cleverclove plays Laertes, Rosalind, Dora, Lady Macbeth (not pictured) and various side characters, should the need arise

@moonlarked plays Horatio

@withasideofshakespeare plays Hotspur, Kate, and Malcolm (latter two not pictured)

@veil-of-exordia plays Polonius and Reynaldo (not pictured)

@hamletthebrain (predictably) plays Hamlet and Richard

@lost1ndaydream plays Margaret and Hal (not pictured)

@angel-of-fallen-dreams plays Mercutio, Ophelia, Osric, Rosencrantz, and Moth (latter two not pictured). also, probably important to mention that this ophelia design is NOT canon! college au ophe is much more goth, I just based her design off my memory.

@acting-pterygii, otherwise known as myself, am playing Benvolio and Beatrice

this is definitely missing characters, but these are the main and most active players for now! have a good day, oh, and whatever you do, DON’T touch the big yellow bucket.

[patdkoala]

Meant To Be Yours

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x female reader

Warnings: smut, riding, bottom!Pedro, nicknames

I am not an actress. I am not a model. I am not famous in any way shape or form.

I met Pedro at a Mexican restaurant. Not at a convention, not at a concert, not even at some premiere. We met by accident.

I was at the bar ordering drinks for me and my friends who were all seated at the table close by. It was my best friend's bachelorette party.

"Hi, can I get 8 shots of your cheapest tequila? We have got a group of horny women that need to drink," I said as the bartender smiled at me and then he started pouring the drinks as I handed him the cash.

I dropped one of my dollars and so I went to pick it up off the floor but instead this handsome man bent down on the floor and picked up my money and handed it back to me.

"Here you dropped this, sweetheart," He said as I rolled my eyes and took the money from him, and handed it to the bartender.

"Sorry, did I say something wrong?" The man asked as I just stood there and ignored him. "I'm not your sweetheart," I said as he chuckled to himself and then he ordered his drink and walked away.

I took the shots that were on a tray and walked back over to my group of friends.

"Who was that hot guy talking to you?" My best friend asked as I looked back at the bar but the man was gone. "I don't know. He gave me the ick," I said as they all groaned.

"No! Gross, what did he do?"

"He called me sweetheart," I said as a couple of friends groaned and a couple made cute faces. "What? I think it's kind of nice. How old is he? He probably just was talking to you like you are a daughter," One of the friends said as I laughed.

"Yeah, or granddaughter," I said as they all laughed and then we downed our shots and made small talk or had conversations about the upcoming wedding.

The night went on. The restaurant got more crowded and we were all getting overwhelmed.

Ubers were called, boyfriends came to pick them up ( as well as fiancés), and I was the last one standing outside the restaurant.

"Fuck," I muttered to myself as I watched my phone die in my hands.

I looked across the street and saw that there was a pay phone. As I was about to leave the restaurant parking lot, the man from inside the bar stepped outside into the moonlight.

He looked well over 40 but not really 50 yet. No wedding ring meant either divorced or single which was sketchy because of his age.

His hair was dark brown with light grey pieces popping through in the light. His dark brown eyes glistened when he looked at me.

He was tall. Well, tall compared to me. And well dressed. He wore a nice pair of trousers and a nice button-up shirt with a t-shirt underneath. He looked clean and well kept so either this man is gay or the world is finally sending me a message about my impending doom with being an old maid.

"Hey, I'm sorry for calling you sweetheart back in there. I meant it as just a thing to say to a young lady, not something creepy to hit on a lady with," He said as I just stood there and I realized that I had been staring at him.

"No, it's ok. I'm sorry for seeming rude. I thought you were some ugly guy," I said and then I quickly turned red for saying that. Not because I was blushing but because I felt like such an idiot for saying that.

"So it would have been ok to be rude to me if I was an ugly guy?"

"Yes?" I responded now even redder than before.

He laughed it off as I searched my purse for loose change so I could use the payphone.

"I hate to ask but do you have some quarters I could use for the pay phone? My phone died and I need to call a taxi," I said as he just straight up handed me his phone.

"I would offer to drive you home but I don't want you to think I'm a creep."

"I wouldn't think you were a creep," I lied. I totally would. If he was an ugly guy.

"Right. Only if I was an ugly guy," He added.

"So, where is your car?" I asked as I stepped closer toward him and handed him his phone back.

He smirked and then offered his arm for me to take since I was a little wobbly in my heels at the moment.

We walked to this nice big black SUV.

"Damn, either you are a drug dealer or a pimp because I don't know anyone with a badass car like this," I said as I got in the passenger seat.

"You really don't know who I am?" He asked as he got in the driver's seat.

"No? Am I supposed to?"

"You ever see the Mandalorian?"

"No."

"The Last of Us?"

"No."

"Game of Thrones?"

"No."

"Law and Order?"

"No."

"Damn, What do you even watch?"

"I don't have time for tv," I said as I smiled at him.

"Oh. That's cool I guess."

"So, what's your name?" I asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.

"José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal. But, you can just call me Pedro. That's what everyone else calls me," He said as I smiled.

"Well, I want to call you something that no one calls you. So I'm going to call you José. Or brown eyes," I said as he smiled at me as he stopped at a stop sign.

"Well funny enough, someone does call me both of those things," He said as I turned to him. "My mother," He added as I laughed at him.

"What's your name? Because as far as I'm concerned, it's giggles," He said as I laughed again.

No one has ever made me laugh this much.

"(Y/N) (L/N), but you can call me giggles. No one has ever called me that before," I said as he nodded.

We talked the whole drive. He drove for two hours. All over LA.

It wasn't until we noticed that it was 3am.

"Oh my god, I never told you where my house was," I said as he and I laughed so hard.

"Well, are you hungry?" He asked as I shook my head. "Always," I said as he then pulled into a drive-thru.

We ordered the food and laughed at each other the whole ride up to the window.

"Oh my god, you're Pedro Pascal!" The woman at the window screamed as we drove up.

"See? I told you," He said as he took a selfie with the sweet girl.

We ate in the dark parking lot.

We laughed. Talked some more. Ate some more. Laughed some more.

Before we knew it, the sun was rising.

"I wish this night would last forever," I said as he rested his head back on the headrest.

"Yeah, me too," He said as we then just looked at each other.

"I mean, it can. Where do you want to go now? I'll take you anywhere you want to go," He said as I smiled and laughed at him again.

"Home, José. I have to go to work in a few hours," I said as he nodded then I told him my address and he took me home.

The car came to a complete stop in front of my house and I turned to smile at him.

"Thank you for hanging out with me, José," I said as he smiled back at me. "My pleasure, giggles," He said with a wink.

I got out of the car and then as I walked up the front steps to my house, I realized that he was staring at me as I walked up the steps.

I never told him where I work. I hate to sound clique but I work at a coffee shop in downtown LA.

I clocked into work and started my day with 0 hours of sleep. My boss was annoying per usual. Customers were mean per usual.

Except for the one customer that walked in and made my day 100 times better.

"What are you doing here, giggles?" He asked as he walked up to my register. "I could ask you the same thing, José," I said as he smiled and then ordered his INSANE coffee order.

"How are you not dead?" I asked as I handed him the cup. "Dude, I have no idea. My brain is so fried right now."

I laughed at him again and this time he just stood there smiling at me.

"I don't mean to sound so forward but we did spend all night together so, can I get your phone number?" He asked as I continued to laugh.

"Well, then I should probably tell you the truth."

"What are you talking about? Oh no. Are you married or something?" He asked as I shook my head.

"No, but I lied when I said I didn't know who you were. I wanted to humble you." I laughed as he then laughed.

"The truth is that I was late to the bachelorette party because I was sitting in the parking lot watching your hot ones episode and then last night I watched your SNL skits. I also binged all of The Last of Us last week," I said as he stood there and then he nodded.

"Right, well. I won't ask again."

"Ask for what? Do you still want my number? Are you sure? Even though I lied to you?"

"Everyone deserves to be humbled every once in a while," He said as I smiled.

I then turned toward my coworker. "Hey, can you cover me? I'll be back in 30 minutes," I said as she nodded and then I handed her my apron.

I took Pedro by the hand and dragged him outside toward his car.

We go in the back seat.

I pushed him into the car so it was only fitting that he be on the bottom.

"What are we doing here exactly?" He asked as he held onto my hips.

"I am going to ride you before I have to go back to my shift and then you are going to pick me up from my house tonight and take me out on a proper date," I said as I undid his belt. "Is that okay with you?"

He just nodded and then shimmied out of his jeans just enough for me to sit on his dick.

He felt so good.

"God, you feel so good," He said as I moaned and felt my whole body clench around him.

He held onto my hips as if I was filled with helium.

"Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere," I said as he bucked his hips up and moved further into me. "Good, because I won't let you," He said as I screamed out in ecstasy.

I felt him jolt inside of me which was a sign that he was close.

I got off of him and I went back to work.

I just fucked José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal.

Like a girlboss.

[aluria-sevhex]

I CAN KILL SIFFRIN. WITH ANAPHYLAXIS. but... will have i have to do the second floor again...

Notes time~!

-please the child say it's yummy

-:D Mira can unfreeze people

-gonna stop for the night

-my break lasted all of yesterday but now i'm back baybeeeeeeee

-i still love the title screen music

-are the enemy names in French?

-yeah i think they are

-eh i feel like dying

-hm looping forwards costs memories... another incentive to fight! yippee i actually like fighting in this game

-i get the kid's drawing every loop :]

-asked Isa about "the hand thing"

-hmmmm methinks there may be... ☆gay☆ :3c

-:0 mysterious 4th hand shape?

-PHONE HAND

-time to loop forward. plantain peel time

-i feel so bad for the frozen people...

-i got a pair of garden scissors! <insert joke about how i've said that Siffrin reminds me of Basil here>

-aw... Mira's anecdotes about the frozen people...

-lol Mira's dying plant

-ooo the Head Housemaiden's office

-love how Vaugarde isn't a monarchy but they call the King that because it's the title he chose and calling him something else would be rude. Vaugarde unsurprisingly supports trans rights

-FUMKIGN ROCK

-FUCK. THE KEY IS IN THE OFFICE.

-oh nice a helpful icon to indicate you've fucked up

-i feel like Loop has some sort of weird thing for Sif...

-exploring elsewhere on the floor

-oh hey a classroom

-how many classes have you taken, Mira? >:)

-ONE HUNDRED FIFTY??? GIRL. DAMN.

-"Someone wrote on the board "Don't stay with your mistakes! Don't be afraid to start over!" You nod! What a true little fact!"

...cheeky

-"no eating snacks" live Bonnie reaction: chomp

-why yes i am writing commentary on a bunch of little bits of narration, it's my notes and i get to make the rules

-bonding earrings? hmmmmmmmm

-oh cool Vaugardians tend to give people multiple names

-fuck yeah trans rights

-oh? Odile has another name?

-Isa doesn't want to tell his because "if i do change again, i want it to be a surprise" again? 👀

-:O THE STYLISH LADY'S NOTEBOOK

-fuck. another weird Sadness

-aight looping time

-my favorite part of the game was when Siffrin said "it's looping time" and looped all over the place

-Mira and Isa: getting hopeful and romantic about how this couple's reunion might go.

Bonnie and Odile:

-hmmmm why u wanna know what a bonding earring is, Sif?

-:0 library? LIBRARY

-"people don't REALLY kiss in plays, do they?" Bonnie. actors do a lot of things.

-your honor they're friends

-the fuck happened to the island. does this have something to do with Loop and/or the King

-how fitting that a game centered on time shenanigans puts so much emphasis on change

-BONNIE CANONICALLY NARUTO RUNS???

-ah yes the Opposite Sides of the Age Spectrum Alliance vs. the Beauty Alliance

-bruh. i picked the wrong way

-"grape juice for adults"

-bonding earrings explanation!

-"I wanna know what happens when prople love each other very much, no one's ever told me!" XD oh, Bonnie

-"And if the bonding is between three or more people, you'd make as many earrings as there are people!" VAUGARDE SAYS POLYAMORY IS COOL

-kinda cool that they basically do wedding earrings instead of rings

-"Not my kind of thing" eh fair

-Isa, Mira, and Bonnie are now overthinking the normal earrings because Siffrin pointed it out

-Mira doesn't seem to want to get bonded... hmmmm... 🟩⬜️⬛️?

-:0 Mira has beef with the trap room guy? >:O he stole her shit!

-that was a tricky boss

-hehe Isa is hungry

-ISA WHAT KIND OF A QUESTION IS THAT... fair actually. what WOULD they do with any bodies?

-WAIT. THE PINEAPPLE THING IS COMING UP. I CAN DIE OF ANAPHYLAXIS?