#Hill to die on

[theillusionofpants]

Cupcakes are a terrible method of cake delivery. Because they are handheld by design, they should be able to be eaten simply with the hands. However, they are far too big for the average person's mouth. This forces the eater to make a decision: do they 1. bite the frosting, 2. eat the cake, or 3. try a mixture of both? All three of these answers are flawed decisions forces upon us by cupcake design.

Let's assume the eater takes the first path and chooses to eat the frosting first. First off, how dare you. Second, fine you like frosting. Then get a spoon and go to town on a jar of saccharine diabetes and leave the cake out of it. Smear your teeth blue with the reckless abandon of a 4 year old at a daycare birthday party. But the construction of a cupcake implies a blending of flavors and textures and eating an entire bite of frosting is like licking a mound of dye flavored toothpaste off the top. And what is left after you've completed that task? A muffin.

The only difference between a muffin and a cupcake is the frosting itself. If you are not going to eat the frosting, then don't bother with a cupcake at all

Which brings me to the third and probably most popular choice, which is to honk down as big a bite of both as possible. This is probably my least favorite option precisely because it highlights the complete design failure of a cupcake. By flying too close to the sun and attempting to have both frosting and cake in the same bite, you end up smearing what's left of the frosting on the top of your nose as you bite down and leave a crumbly mess of a dessert in your wake. It is so difficult to have a good first bite of a cupcake but it is nigh impossible to have a good second bite due to the carnage your mandibles enacted with the first. It isn't your fault, dear one. It is the cupcakes fault!

Some of you may be thinking, "but OP, why not rip the bottom off the cupcake, put it on top, and then have a sandwich!" And to this I say, why does the baker not make a more functional dessert?? Is it necessary for me to fundamentally alter the structure of a burrito to consume it? Must I construct a vessel out of soup parts to enjoy? No, I do not. Macaroons enjoy the filling on the inside and so I say if cupcakes were meant to be sandwiches, then they would be.

However, hope is not lost. Though it is bleak, I come bearing a solution, for I am not the first nor will I be the last to suffer through the indignity of this chaotic dessert. The solution lies in portion. The MINI cupcake is the answer. It should be the default option in cupcake consumption! One singular bite of all that is right in cupcake world. The ratio of frosting to cake is perfect! No longer must we lick off sugar glaze until out teeth rot. No longer must we brush bits of cake from our clothes. The MINI cupcake is an all-inclusive taste experience. It fits neatly into the smallest of mouths. And then we get more of them! Perhaps a six pack of minis can be split between friends! Perhaps we can all try new flavors and combinations! Let us ditch the old and draconic cupcakes in favor of the sleek and elegance of its mini.

[artist-issues]

I have this friend who said, "I don't believe we always have to die on the same hill, but everyone should have hills that they're ready to die on." And I very much believe that

[gay-ghostwriter]

People who put white text on yellow backgrounds need to be shot

[xr-377]

🤝

Druid for life

best class any edition

[artbyeloquent]

ID: Two images of asks from @mecharose, @wallacejwriting , @squid--inc--writes , @helathorloki , and @calicojackofficial with varying amounts of fountain pen emojis. Total pens: 11.

The 11 sentence snippet I wrote last night (and yes i did quit on the description part, it wasn't coming to me lmao):

warning: mild reference to spoilers from act i

The hall that held Ariel’s hospital room was < description from what Rimon would notice >. At the end, Rimon caught sight of their Devorah.

It was uncanny, seeing Dev in anything less than her best. Her curls peeked out limply from a baby pink silk turban. She wasn’t a heavy makeup wearer, but she still looked bare in the hospital lighting, no quintessential lip color nor mascara. She had thrown on a heavy peacoat to disguise the heather atheleisure set she had likely clambered into before she even left her bed.

The eyes that turned to meet Rimon’s were ringed in mauve.

“Finally,” her voice said, unfailingly crisp. At least that part never changed.

“What’s going on?” The first words Rimon had uttered since Dev’s call had woken them, they all but scratched out of their throat.

Dev’s mouth set in a thin line.

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

Thanks, you just reminded me of one of my all Time favourite memes

the hill me and the mutuals are dying on

[planefood]

rules for thee and not for me

[dread-pirate-momo]

So I was Doom Scrolling as one does, and I read a post about what unpopular opinion/Hill you would Die on....for me it is the fact I Absolutely HATE Pumpkin Spice anything. Give me Apple Cider! Please & Thank You 😌

[miametropolis]

9th doctor you have to stop. your doc martens too classic. your leather jacket too cunt. your buzzcut too perfect. your swag is too lesbian...9th doctor they'll kill you.

[daydreamshenanigans]

I recently went to see the Spy X Family movie. Can confirm one of my favourite tropes out these is found family.

I will die on this hill.

… And then the stars come in and light up all their world.

—————–

<<< previous page can be found here

[mikurinkuwu]

butchfemme mikurin

[catmask]

being the most left leaning family member means everyone will always think that youre insane and then in two years they will believe what you were explaining to them two years ago but still think youre insane now. and you do it anywaybecause you love them

[maniaeofmadness]

I am a firm believer that Stan and Mabel are not the "dumber" twins. They just aren't as interesting in 'nerd' stuff like Ford and Dipper are.

Stan was able to rebuild like 90% of the portal with only the 1 of the journals, most likely having to teach himself advanced mathematics and scientific theories to even understand what the thing is. It barely took him a few weeks to get the portal up and running after getting the other two journals. Not to mention how he was able to create a business and keep people entertained at his day job. The man is smart.

Mabel is able to create sweaters at the drop of a hat. If you don't know anything about knitting, it takes a lot of math and planning to be able to make a sweater, and Mabel is constantly making them for everyone around her. She made a full 2 act puppet shows with musical numbers and sets and well made puppets in like a week. She may not be interested in the 'nerd' stuff like Dipper, but she's creative and thinks in innovative ways.

Both of them are amazingly charismatic. They can make friends and bond with those around them easily, whether it be for business purposes like Stan or simply childlike positivity like Mabel.

They aren't dumb.

[immawraffle]

I might die on this hill but so will you if I have anything to say about it

I know it’s not hard to point out reactionaries hypocrisy when it comes to like safe spaces or hug boxes or whatever but genuinely how much of an echo chamber do you have to exist in for you to think this is a reasonable thing to say

[malenjoyer]

Taking my son out for enrichment

[artbyeloquent]

In case you are only counting asks ;)

🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋🖋

I feel like this is enough pens that I can forgo the "5 people" rule for posting a snippet, LMAO.

Total pens: 10

I gotta say, I was REALLY in the flow today. It finally feels like htdo is kinda starting to come together, both in my head and on the page? SCREAMS

content warning: hospitals

Ariel could smell before he could see.

He hadn’t been in a hospital since his top surgery, but the smell was unmistakable. At the surface, it was sweet—linen or lavender or lemon, whatever artificial fragrance was coating the room. Underneath it, though, the antiseptic was inescapably sour. Even the nurses, wearing whatever fragrances their loved ones had given them, couldn’t win the battle against all the sanitizers clinging to their skin and clothes.

It hurt to open his eyes, even with the lights turned low. He might as well have been cracking open thousand-year-old fossils encased in amber. The city lights outside his window burned through the curtains.

It took him a little too long to realize he wasn’t alone.

Rimon and Dev stared at him with hushed anticipation. He winced when his neck resisted his attempts to better turn toward them. The weight of living had his sternum and spine on lock-down.