#Gale gets to keep his sexy husband but also gets to not have to deal with a tiefling clawing at him 24/7

[ranger-crisis]

Holy fuck I think I just solved the biggest issue I had with Joyce and Gale’s relationship

[tcm]

The Golden Boy, John Garfield By Susan King

Stanley Kowalski in Tennessee Williams’ A Streetcar Named Desire was Marlon Brando’s signature role. It made the then 23-year-old Brando an overnight Broadway sensation in 1947, and he electrified movie audiences and earned his first Oscar nomination for the classic 1951 film version. But he wasn’t the first choice to play Blanche’s earthy brother-in-law. Producer Irene Selznick had her eyes on Hollywood star John Garfield, who frequently took time out from movies to return to the Great White Way for limited runs.

In fact, writer John Lahr reported in 2014 that on July 19, 1947, Selznick drew up a contract for the 34-year-old actor, “one of the few sexy Hollywood stars with a proletarian pedigree. The Selznick office leaked the big news to the press. The contract was never signed. On August 18 the deal with Garfield collapsed.”

One of the reasons bandied about was that Garfield turned down the role because the contract would have kept him away from Hollywood for too long. Though Brando is considered the performer who ushered in the more naturalistic style of acting (known as “the Method”) both on stage and in film, truth be told it was Garfield who was the catalyst for Brando, as well as Montgomery Clift, Paul Newman, James Dean and Steve McQueen.

Just look at Garfield’s first feature film, FOUR DAUGHTERS (’38). Directed by Michael Curtiz, the cast includes Lane sisters Lola, Rosemary and Priscilla, in addition to Gale Page as the four musically inclined daughters of a widower music professor (Claude Rains). Enter handsome boy-next-door Jeffrey Lynn as a budding composer named Felix who endears himself with all the daughters, especially peppy Ann (Priscilla Lane).

The household is put in an uproar with the arrival of Garfield’s Mickey Borden, the original rebel anti-hero. Unkempt, slovenly and possessing a massive chip on his shoulder, Mickey is an orchestrator who has arrived at the house to work with Felix. You can’t keep your eyes off him especially in this early monologue where he explains his anger to Ann:

“They’ve been at me now nearly a quarter of a century. No let-up. First, they said, ‘Let him do without parents. He’ll get along.’ Then they decided, ‘He doesn’t need education. That’s for sissies.’ Then right at the beginning, they tossed a coin, ‘Heads he’s poor, tail’s he’s rich.’ So, they tossed a coin…with two heads. Then for the finale, they got together on talent. ‘Sure, they said, let him have talent. Not enough to let him do anything on this own, anything good or great Just enough to let him help people. It’s all he deserves.’”

There was a sexuality and eroticism to Garfield’s performance that was 180 degrees different from Lynn’s durable and safe leading man. He was so natural; it was almost like someone found Garfield walking down the street in the Bronx and asked him to star in the movie. “He was the prototypical Depression rebellion youth,” actor Norman Lloyd told me about Garfield for the L.A. Times in 2003. They first met in 1937 and worked together on Garfield’s final film HE RAN ALL THE WAY (’51).

“He combined all of these elements of darkness and rebelliousness with the charm and the poignancy and he became the prototypical actor of that time. He never changed as a person. He remained just as a wonderful guy. He was a man of great charm, a good fellow, very likable.”

There was a lot of Mickey in Garfield, who was born Jacob Julius Garfinkle in 1913 on the Lower East Side of New York to poor Russian immigrants. Julie, as he was called, had a rough and tumble upbringing. His mother died when he was seven. “He hated his father,” his daughter Julie Garfield noted in 2003. “His father was awful to him. He was torn away from his brother.” In fact, Garfield once said that if he hadn’t become an actor, he would have been “Public Enemy No. 1.”

Unlike Mickey, the fates and destiny were looking after him. First, it was educator Angelo Patri, who became a surrogate dad to Julie at P.S. 45, a high school for troubled students. With Patri’s encouragement, he joined the debate team where he discovered he had a gift for acting. That was further nurtured when he received a scholarship to Maria Ouspenskaya’s acting school. He was all of 18 when he made his Broadway debut in 1932 in Lost Boy and became the youngest member of the progressive and influential Group Theatre, appearing in Clifford Odets’ early masterpieces Waiting for Lefty and Awake and Sing. 

Odets wrote the play Golden Boy for Garfield in 1937, but director Harold Clurman decided to give the lead role of boxer Joe Bonaparte to Luther Adler and cast Garfield in a minor role. His unhappiness with Clurman’s decision pushed Garfield into signing a contract with Warner Bros. And FOUR DAUGHTERS made him an overnight sensation. He earned a Supporting Actor Oscar nomination, but lost to Walter Brennan who picked up his second Academy Award in that category for Kentucky (‘38).

The following year, Garfield, Rains, the Lane siblings, Page and Curtiz reunited for DAUGHTERS COURAGEOUS, in which the actors played different characters from the prior film. It was probably the best film Garfield made that year. But Warner Brothers put him in a lot of movies that were unworthy of his talent including BLACKWELL’S ISLAND (’39) where he was typecast as a gangster. He made some good movies in 1941, including THE SEA WOLF, which also starred Edward G. Robinson and Ida Lupino and reunited him with Curtiz, and also Anatole Litvak’s atmospheric noir OUT OF THE FOG also with Lupino.

Because he suffered heart damage from scarlet fever, Garfield couldn’t serve during World War II. But he entertained the troops on USO tours and opened the famous Hollywood Canteen with Bette Davis so the troops could be entertained and be served by some of Hollywood’s biggest stars. Both Davis and Garfield appeared as themselves in the hit 1944 film HOLLYWOOD CANTEEN. Garfield also fought the global conflict on screen, giving one of his strongest and grittiest performances in PRIDE OF THE MARINES (’45), a poignant drama based on the life Al Schmid who was blinded by a grenade during the Battle of Guadalcanal. He returns home to his wife (Eleanor Powell) a bitter, doubting man who has a difficult time trying to deal with his new life.

The year 1946 saw the release of two of Garfield’s most enjoyable films HUMORESQUE and THE POSTMAN ALWAYS RINGS TWICE. HUMORESQUE was his last film under his Warner Bros. contract. It’s a delicious melodramatic wallow with Garfield playing a poor New York kid who becomes a famous concert violinist. Joan Crawford, coming off her Oscar-winning triumph in Mildred Pierce (’45), plays a wealthy patroness who sets her sights on Garfield. Garfield went to MGM for POSTMAN, which was based on James M. Cain’s best-selling thriller. Garfield turns up the heat with Lana Turner as illicit lovers who brutally murder her husband only to turn on each other when they are caught.

The actor teamed up with Bob Roberts to form an independent production company, Enterprise Productions, and their first feature was the boxing classic BODY AND SOUL (’47), for which he earned his second Oscar nomination as Charley Davis, a boxer who loses his way when he gets involved with an unscrupulous promoter. Not only does he have a strong chemistry with leading lady Lilli Palmer, but also African American actor Canada Lee as Ben, a boxer with brain damage. And Garfield gets to utter one of his greatest lines in BODY AND SOUL: “What are you going to do? Kill me? Everybody dies.”

Though his next Enterprise production wasn’t a hit, FORCE OF EVIL (’48), co-written and directed by Abraham Polonsky, is a terrific film noir with a hard-hitting Garfield as a corrupt attorney trying to save his numbers-racket brother (Thomas Gomez) from his gangster boss. Garfield returned to Warner Bros. and Curtiz in 1950 for THE BREAKING POINT, which was based on Hemingway’s 1937 novel, To Have and Have Not. It’s an outstanding film noir with a superb performance from Garfield as well as from Black actor Juano Hernandez who plays his partner on the fishing boat.

THE BREAKING POINT was Garfield’s penultimate film and was not a hit because The Blacklist was engulfing Hollywood and the actor, despite the fact he wasn’t a Communist. His film career was over in 1951 when he refused to cooperate with HUAC at his hearing. Before his death of a heart attack in 1952 at the age of 39, Garfield did appear in a short-lived Broadway revival of Golden Boy, which also starred Lee J. Cobb, a young Jack Klugman and Joseph Wiseman.

Though she was only 6 ½ when he died, Julie Garfield recalls seeing her father on stage in Golden Boy where he introduced her during the curtain call. “When he smiled at you it was like being in the sun,” she noted. “He was funny and sometimes he would like to dance and kick up his legs. I remember him adoring me. He used to take me to the merry-go-round a lot in New York. He was so strong, so handsome and he loved to kid me. He would give me this mischievous smile. I wish I remembered more about him…”

[antwine69]

Beej X male reader who works in a funeral home 🥺😳

Holy moly this is such a cute concept 🥺🥺💞

Male!Reader

⚠️Warnings: Mentions of death, Beej being generally raunchy and kinda insentitive, mentions/of dead bodies, side-character death! ⚠️

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It had all started on an unusually cold day in Spring. You were in the Funeral Home, a morbid part-time job that you had to take just to get through the day. Though, it had its own "Dark Academia aesthetic" to it, so it wasn't a bad. Plus, you got more and more desensitized to death every day!

You waved goodbye to the family that had just come in here to arrange some things for their dead "Pop-Pop", as the kid they brought in had called him. Poor thing, it couldn't have been more than five years old. It probably didn't have much of a grasp of what had happened to "Pop-Pop". She didn't know he was dead, lying in the back, in a cold casket so they could bring him out in a car tomorrow, and stick him in the ground. You sat down in your swivel chair behind the counter, spinning slightly in it. The shop was quiet, nothing but the wind swooshing by outside and the constant ticking of the clock could be heard echoing through the establishment.

You sighed, deciding to go to the back to see if Margaret, your co-worker who was probably older than most of the bodies here, had left anything for you before she left. She usually did that, because she would always look at you and say "Young man! You need to get some meat on those bones! Let Nana Margie fix you up something!" You weren't even that thin. She was a delight, though. Her husband had passed away some time ago, and she came into this establishment crying, and came out with a job there. She was sort of everybody's grandmother. The thought that she might not have much time left made her so giving, you thought you might never meet a more generous person in your life.

You went into the employee kitchen, seeing a plate of cookies wrapped in plastic wrap, with a bright green sticky note on it.

"For you, Young Man! It's Friday! Enjoy yourself :)

-Nana

Ps. Could you check the rat trap in the back, my old knees don't seem to wanna listen when I wanna crouch down there! Thank you, darling <3"

You laughed a little, opening the plastic wrap and taking a cookie. You also pocketed the note, a tendency you had picked up after a while, so that one day you could make a scrap book for her. She deserved to know she was loved.

You took a bite of the cookie as you went to the back, or "The hall of Death" as you had so dearly nicknamed it. It was where you took the recently deads that were going to be transported to a grave the very next day. You nodded to them as you went along, jokingly addressing them by name. ``Mr. Gale. Mrs. Potts. Mr. Jones.`` You chuckled and crouched down once you got to the back of the room, checking the rat trap. No rats. Margaret's vision was the same, so you couldn't exactly blame her. ``Oh well, Margie, you can never be too sure.`` you said to yourself, giving a chuckle. You stood, about to turn around, when a little jingle sounded throughout the room. A chill ran down your spine as you realised what made the sound. There were bells tied to each of the dead person's feet. They were there to ensure that the dead people were actually dead, and jingled when the dead person moved. It was one of the sounds you would never want to hear in one of these establishments. Fuck.

You turned around, hearing a louder, almost insistent jingle. Mr. Liren in the middle of the room. You swallowed and carefully walked over, spotting a card on Mr. Liren's leg. The bell was jingling like crazy now, but the body wasn't moving. What the hell was going on? You carefully picked up the card, flipping it around. The backside was striped, and was clearly drawn very hastily in sharpie. The moment you stopped to examine the back, the room filled up with jingles. Every bell in the room gave off a symphony of disjointed jingles and some even fell off of the string. You flipped it back to the other side, seeing the text. A shabby drawing of what looked like a beetle, a glass of liquid, and an x3. ``Beetle... Water times three? What the fuck?`` the bells all crashed to the ground and seemingly jumped up and down on their own, jingling and clicking on the ground.

You scrambled your brain, fear getting to you. The water was coloured in. ``Beetle Soda?`` more aggressive jingling. ``fuck... Uh... Beetle.. Juice?`` the bells started jumping up and down rhythmically. 1,2,3. 1,2,3. You swallowed and took a breath. Whatever this was, it wanted you to say this phrase three times. What were you supposed to do? This couldn't just be some prank. It was way too... real. What would this entity do if you didn't oblige? You closed your eyes, clutching the card. ``Beetlejuice.... Beetlejuice.... Beetlejuice.`` The bells stopped. It was quiet. It seemed like the world had just froze. You opened your eyes, looking around. Nothing. Mabye this was a prank. ``What a load of bullsh-`` you were about to swear to yourself or go on a rant or something but it was cut short by the appearance of green smoke at your feet. Yikes.

Slowly, the blanket over Mr. Liren started rising. Somebody was there, and it wasn't Mr. Liren. The room was now almost hidden in thick, green smoke, and the blanket was floating about half a metre above Mr. Liren, clearly with a person under it. All you could do was stare and back up, backing into one of the other dead body tables, slipping on a bell and nearly falling. A cackle tore through the room and the sheet was thrown off and onto the floor in a flash of green light.

``Awe Yeah, Baby! The B-Man's back!`` a raspy voice shrieked, and the smoke parted as a man floated down toward you, grinning. ``Oh, Babes! You really do know how to keep a demon waiting! You're obedient, though, I like my men like that.`` he gave a wink, putting a finger under your chin, forcing you to meet his gaze. The demon was wearing a torn, old, black and white striped suit, his hair was an electric green and he looked as though, if he was standing, he'd be just a little taller than you. He must have noticed your confused and lightly flustered look, because he pulled back, letting his eyes rake over you very unsubtly.

``I see you're still confused... Don't worry, Sexy! I'll inform you!`` He yelled, snapping. A ghostly whistle was heard, and somewhere you could hear music that sounded like it should be best suited on a Haunted American Footbal Game. ``Ready! Alright! Let's rock! Hey! Don't look away! This demon's here to make your day! You need a friend? I'm here to help! I'm the B to the Double-E- J - F - Q - And Jesus, I cannot spell.`` he.... Was singing. To you. A weird demon guy was singing and dancing along to spooky Cheerleader music. As if on cue, Cheerleaders ran into the room, flailing their pompoms in your face. You coughed and pushed them away, their grinning faces sending you right back to high school. ``Hi! He's by your side! He-`` before they could do their weird cheer thing, you yelled. A yell you didn't think you had in you. ``Stop! Stop, please..`` the music dragged to a halt, and the cheerleaders looked at you, quite upset. You muttered a "sorry" and they walked off. The demon lowered himself to the floor, huffing.

``Can you please just tell me who you are? Without singing? Please?`` You asked, still trying to calm your nerves. The demon groaned, giving a toddler like stomp. ``Fine! You already said my name, you should know it! I'm a demon, and you summoned me, just like I wanted and now I'm tied to you and whatever.`` he replied, floating up and laying back in the air, crossing his legs and folding his arms behind his head. You already said his name? ``Wait... Beetlejuice! Your name is Beet-``

Beetlejuice audibly squeaked, rushing down and slamming a hand over your mouth. ``Don't say it! Ever! Bad things will happen!`` he yelled, keeping his hand on your mouth. He smelled like earth and rain that had just hit the warm summer pavement. There was also a distinct scent of dust and mold as he continued to invade your personal space. You frantically nodded and he slowly took his hand away.

``Wait, you're bound to me? What does that mean?`` you asked, moving away from him and picking up the Mr. Liren's sheet, gently putting it over him again. ``Well, it means only you can un-summon me! Duh. This is like, basic demon facts. Is this your first time working with a demon or something?`` he replied, a chuckle running through his voice. You shot him a glare, and he let out an "oh." floating down to the floor.

You sighed, looking at the time. It was closing time. ``We'll deal with this at home.`` you said, walking out of the back room, the striped demon shooting after you like an excited puppy. ``Oh man! You're takin' me home? At least take me on a date first! Ahaha!`` he said, laughing loudly. You just ignored him, turning off all the lights in the shop and putting on your jacket.

``C'mon demon, you have some explaining to do.``

----------

I couldn't help myself but write some headcannons, I just really love this concept a lot! Here they are!

•Beej loves that you work with the dead, and always asks you questions about dead people and is actually pretty vile to some of them

•You often have to tell him that he can't go around pretending to tickle dead people or try to "scare them awake".

•You have to tell him this way too often.

•He often greets people you can't see, and if actually remarkably respectful to them while you're around. He doesn't try to do anything as long as you glare at him, and he just bows slightly to the air and sometimes says things like "Follow the book" or "Draw a door."

•You like to think he's talking to the spirits of the dead people.

•One day you actually get confirmation on this, as, right after Margaret passes away, he comes to you and gives you some papers. His hair is streaked with blue and it's clear he's been crying. There are tear drop marks on the paper, but you can still see just fine what it is. In Beetlejuice's shabby handwriting, there is a recipe. "Nana Margie's cookies (For young men who need to grow)" and "Nana Margie's Chicken Soup (For young men who are sick)" You look at him and get nothing but a sniffle and a "She wanted you to have that. So she could help you grow." You've never hugged anybody so hard in your life. Those recipes are framed and hang in your kitchen. They're used more than you ever thought they would be.

•Slowly, you warm up to Beej. He's a gross, insensitive rat man. But he's your rat man.

Okay it's over now- I just thought this was really cute- So cute that I might make a part 2?? 👀👀

Mabye-

Alright! That's it for this time! Take care of yourself and remember to wash your hands! See y'all Spooky Cheerleaders in the Neitherworld! Peace out!

PS. Sorry for the horrid song lyrics, the regular ones didn't fit the situation, but I still wanted the gag there, so I had to improvise :')

[everlarkficexchange]

Better Tomorrow

Part Two

Written by: @mega-aulover

Prompt 78: forced to share a bed and building a pillow barrier but still waking up tangled together. [submitted by anonymous]

Continuation of March 28th Birthday Prompt for @thestuckinbed Read Part 1  Here . Special thanks to my friend and Beta @norbertsmom for editing this monster and inspiring me. Also thanks to the ladies of EverlarkFicExchange for hosting this event and for extending it a week.

RATED M, (Mature Subjects, Violence & Sexy Everlark Times)

“What’s going on?” Gale said from behind.

“I’m getting married to Peeta,” Katniss said softly not removing her eyes from Peeta’s face. She liked the way his face filled with color. He looked cute.

“What?” Gale sputtered.

“Tomorrow, I’ll meet you at the Justice Building.”

“Tomorrow it is,” Katniss agreed. Tomorrow she was getting married to her boy with the bread.

“No,” Gale sputtered. “No you’re supposed to marry ME!”

“Gale, it’s over, I’ve made my choice,” Katniss tried to diffuse the situation, but it was no use. Gale threw down the contents he carried and lunged at Peeta.

“PEETA WATCH OUT!” Katniss shouted.

Peeta was skilled at defending himself. He was a champion wrestler in school and had two older brothers that picked on him as a kid. He easily deflected Gale’s attempts to tackle him. “Gale I don’t want to fight!”

“You stole my woman!” Gale lunged at Peeta once more.  

“Gale, Katniss is her own woman.” Peeta gave her a brief glance, right before he avoided Gale rushing at him. “She makes her own decisions and she doesn’t belong to anyone.”

“Screw you, you ugly moron,” Gale shouted, “You bastard!”

“Gale stop, this is useless,” Katniss pleaded. Gale was a hothead and shouting profanities at Peeta didn’t help his cause with Katniss. He was acting like an idiot. “Peeta and I are getting married in the morning.” Katniss tried to get in the way but Gale pushed her to the ground.

“Katniss,” Peeta ran to her. “Are you okay?” He cupped her cheek, his eyes searched her face.

“I’m okay.”

“You’ve got a scrape on your face.”  Peeta gently helped her get up.

As she stood Katniss saw Gale was heading for Peeta. “Peeta, behind you…”

The warmth left Peeta’s eyes when he turned to face Gale. His jaw tensed, his amiability was replaced by a cold menacing look. Katniss was sure seeing the way Gale carelessly shoved her, caused Peeta to snap.  It was then the fight began in earnest.

Peeta tackled Gale to the ground, they rolled around punching the other. Both ended up in the street. Gale was a tall brute and often used his anger to win fights. Peeta wasn’t as tall but he had more mass and experience. By now half the district surrounded them. Mrs. Mellark watched from the bakery. Her face pressed up against the window.

Peeta had Gale in a headlock when Darius turned up. By then half the town was outside, each with the knowledge the fight started over the upcoming marriage.

“Okay you break it up,” Darius said, pulling Peeta off Gale.

“It’s not fair, that Merchant stole MY girl,” Gale cried as he was pulled away.

Gale’s declaration made Katniss mad, she’d never been his girl.

“This is over a girl,” Darius said incredulously.

“Katniss and I are getting married in the morning. Gale overheard our conversation. Instead of being happy for his friend he attacked me. I tried not to fight but Gale pushed Katniss on the ground,” Peeta said wiping his mouth.

All eyes turned to Katniss who touched her cheek to try to cover up the scar and bruising that was no doubt coloring her face.

“Hot stuff,” Darius glanced at her face, “You want to press charges?”

“No, let him go home to his mother.” Katniss sighed.

“Peeta stay out of trouble,” Darius said. Turning to Gale, he added, “You let’s go, your mother is going to bust a gasket when she learns you got into another fight.”  Darius led Gale away and Katniss was relieved.

“YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED!” Peeta’s father’s smile was wider than the man on the moon.

“Yes dad, Katniss and I are going to get married at the Justice Building in the morning.”

“Eileen, did you hear Peeta’s getting hitched in the morning!” Mr. Mellark shouted to his wife, who looked like she’d eaten something sour. His exuberance caused a few in the gathered crowd to chuckle.

Mr. Mellark boasted, “EVERYONE GET YOUR BREAD TODAY. IN HONOR OF MY SON’S WEDDING, THE BAKERY WILL BE CLOSED TOMORROW!!”  

Peeta pulled Katniss to the side, “You okay with this, everyone knowing.”

Katniss glanced at the ground, lost for words. What should have been a private affair turned into a public spectacle, and all because of Gale. The only thing she could think of saying was,  “I’m okay with it if you’re okay with it.”

“Okay, I’ll have to go down to the Justice Building now and make the appointment, I’ll try for 9 or 10 am is that okay? Will that give you enough time to get ready?”

“I guess so.” Katniss thought for a second about what she would wear. Renting a dress was unnecessary since they weren’t going to have a Toasting. Maybe she’ll take a bath and wear the light blue dress she was supposed to wear at the 74th Hunger Games Reaping. It was so nice to know she would never have to dress up for another Reaping again.

“Okay, I’ll send word, so that you know the time.”

Katniss nodded and began to walk away.

“Oh, Katniss,” Peeta called.

She turned around.

“Thank you.”

Katniss smiled, glad that she had helped her boy with the bread. The news had spread across the Seam by the time she arrived home. Prim and her mother were waiting for her. They were both excited, whispering and giggling into the night.  They became even more secretive when Mr. Mellark stopped by with bread to inform them Katniss was to be at the Justice Building by 10A.M.

When it was time for bed, her mother was called for an emergency. Katniss was with her sister in their bedroom.

“I can’t believe you’re getting married,” Primrose said. Her sister was laying on her belly on the other bed, she had her chin propped up by her hands, and her feet  were slowly waving back and forth like Buttercup’s tail. Her baby sister looked like their mother, blonde blue eyed. At fourteen she was already taller than Katniss. Without the Games, her sister no longer lived in fear. The only thing her sister had to do was eat and dream of a better tomorrow.

Katniss brushed her hair calmly. By now the entire district knew of her pending nuptials in the morning. Gale had caused such a ruckus because of her deal with Peeta.

“I can’t believe Gale tried to punch your future husband,” Prim said with a far off dreamy look. “It’s so romantic being fought over.”

“Prim,” Katniss said. She put the brush down. She wanted to dispel those archaic notions from her baby sister’s head.  “Gale and Peeta’s fight today was not romantic. It was dangerous and foolish, either one of them could have gotten hurt or could have been thrown in jail for disturbing the peace. Fighting is never the answer.”

“But Gale had it coming to him! For years I’ve seen him hound you mercilessly about getting married. I know you, you don’t have an inkling of romance toward him because if you did you’d be like the other simpering females in the district. They always sigh and get googly eyed whenever Gale walks by.” Prim made a face like she’d eaten something foul. “I don’t get why all of my friends dream about kissing him.”

Katniss grimaced as she conjured up Gale’s image in her head. She was repulsed by the idea of being anything more to Gale then his hunting partner. She would rather have a skunk spray her than kiss Gale.

“So,” Prim said moving from one bed to the other. “I want to know how is it that you and Peeta agreed to get married? And how did Gale find out about it? I need details.”  

Katniss gave her sister a look to drop the subject.

“Katniss, we don’t have secrets, spill!”

Honestly Katniss didn’t know how to tell her sister that the marriage was arranged and there was nothing romantic or passionate about the proposal.  It was a simple agreement made between two consenting adults. As far as Katniss was concerned Peeta was now able to keep the bakery and she would get Gale off her back. It was a win-win for both parties. Katniss would never again listen to Gale nag her about getting hitched. Prim was another problem altogether. Her sister was just as stubborn and persistent as Katniss.

Her sister pounced on top of her, stopping Katniss from moving. Prim was surprisingly heavy. “Come on Katniss, you have to tell me how it happend, how did you agree to get married? You’ve always claimed you never wanted marriage or children, so for you to want to get married to a merchant of all people, the son of the worst person in all of District Twelve is pretty mind blowing!”

“Prim, Peeta and I came to an arrangement,” Katniss hesitantly said. She wasn’t sure how she was going to put it into words what happened since she was bad at talking. Taking a steady breath she said, “I wanted to repay a debt. So I asked him to marry me with the understanding there would be no Toasting.”

“Wait,” Prim said sitting on the bed. She scrunched her nose as she puzzled over what Katniss said to her. “You asked him to marry you because of a debt?”

Katniss nodded suddenly feeling less sure about her decision today.

Her sister, gave her the legendary Everdeen intimidation scowl. “You made the suggestion?”

Katniss had never been able to keep a secret or tell a lie. She blurted out, “I overheard about his predicament from Darius and Greasy Sae. His mother wouldn’t agree to let Peeta have the bakery unless he married. Honestly I don’t even know if it’s true now that I think about it. It could have just been Darius and Greasy Sae gossiping about nonsense.”

“It’s not hearsay Katniss. I heard his mother tried to get Peeta to marry several girls, but he refused,” Prim interjected.

“You knew about this?” Katniss couldn’t believe her ears. How did her sister know about Peeta’s predicament? She sat back, now it was her turn to scowl.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Prim crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s been happening  for months. Peeta’s problems began the moment he graduated and his father announced he wanted to pass the bakery off to Peeta. Mr. Mellark didn’t want to to give the bakery to River because of his drinking problem and the oldest, Carlton is happily married and likes working with his wife’s family. He didn’t want the bakery.”

“Really?” Katniss was taken aback by the news, she was in awe that her sister knew all of this information, while she was oblivious. “How do you know all of this?”

“Vick Hawthorne is Phill Cartwright’s best friend. Phill and Vick are mentors in the Young Engineers of Tomorrow Scholastic Program.” Prim shrugged. “Phill said they were celebrating both Peeta’s and Delly’s graduation when it all happened. Mrs. Mellark invited Tilia Cordata and her parents with the expressed purpose of arranging a marriage. When Peeta found out he became upset and told his mother he didn’t want to marry. He asserted he was the best baker and that if need be he would name Colton’s first born his heir.”

Until she had overheard the conversation at the Hob Katniss had no idea this was going on. She felt bad for Peeta, being forced to get married was barbaric.  She identified with him and his struggle. “I’m sure that didn’t go well.”

“Mrs. Mellark got into a terrible fight with Peeta over his refusal. The argument could be heard from the street. During that row Mrs. Mellark declared that if Peeta didn’t marry then he wouldn’t inherit the bakery when they retired at the end of the year. It would be handed to River. And since Mr. Mellark has never stood up against his wife, he agreed Peeta needed to get married.”

“Huh,” Katniss mouthed. “What else do you know?”

“There’s been a succession of girls that his mother has tried to unsuccessfully pair him up with, Flori Crabapple, Myrtle Carpe, Amy Yellowwood, Honey Locust to name a few. His mother even got Mabel Meadows to come to dinner at the bakery one evening.  Peeta said no to all of them. Until he said yes to you the entire district thought Peeta would never marry.”

Katniss scratched her head going over the conversation. Why would Peeta say no to Mabel Meadows, she had a very nice dowry. Her father owned the town grocers where all of the Peacekeepers purchased their goods. She was well off and she was one of the most beautiful girls in the entire district.

“Why would Peeta not want to marry any of those girls?” Katniss pondered out loud. Why would he agree to marry her. She wasn’t the prettiest girl, nor was she rich. Beyond her hunting skills she a wasn’t good candidate for marriage to anyone. Maybe Katniss thought it was because she didn’t want to have a Toasting with him. In District Twelve a couple wasn’t really married until they had a Toasting ceremony, no matter what the documents given at the Justice Building said. The exchange of toasted bread between a couple was the traditional binding legal way in Twelve, one recognized  by the new government, and Katniss figured that’s why Peeta agreed.

Katniss picked up her brush after braiding her hair, getting ready to go to sleep. She got up and put the brush on the dresser.

Prim climbed into the other bed, and turned to face Katniss. “I have one question though, if you’re marriage is arranged and you’re not doing a Toasting what are you going to do about sex?”

At the word sex, Katniss stubbed her toe on the bed, “Ouch!”

“You okay,” Prim was out of bed and was trying to grab her toe to examine it.

“Yeah,” Katniss said jumping around.

“Stop jumping around and let me take a look,” Prim grabbed Katniss foot and Katniss fell onto the bed. “It doesn’t look bruised, but you should put some of mom’s healing balm on it,” Prim said reaching into her draw for it. “So what are you going to do about sex?”

“Prim!” Katniss hissed not at the balm but at that word again.

“What,” Prim said looking up. Her stare reminded Katniss of Buttercup’s superior look whenever the stinker knew he was being pampered. “Are you embarrassed by the word or the act?”

Katniss was sure she was bright red. Her jaw stung from the rush of warmth to her cheeks.

“Seriously Katniss, you have to be realistic. Sex is a natural part of life. Mother and I counsel every newly wed girl that crosses our door about intimate marital relations. It’s important for women to know of their options.”  

Katniss didn’t want to have ‘this’ conversation with her sister. Nor did she want to hear those words coming out of Prim’s mouth. Her sister kept on talking and there was nowhere Katniss could run off to.

“Legally you’ll be married, but because you’re opting out of a Toasting you have to face the fact that Peeta is a man, and he’s going to want sex. Now before you get all I’m not having children, there a hundred ways to not get pregnant when the time comes. However, if he doesn’t have sex with you then he’s going to engage with someone else. Are you prepared to share him with another partner?” Prim finished applying the balm.  

Everything her sister said was like the cold slap of a wintry breeze upon her face. With frightened eyes Katniss watched her sister put the bottle back in the dresser and climb back into bed without considering the state she left her. Her sister turned down the oil lamp in the room and Katniss was plunged into darkness. Within seconds her sister was fast asleep.

The conversation kept Katniss awake. She lay in bed thinking about sex. Katniss understood the function of it, but she’d never gave mind to the act. Up until she was fifteen she’d been preoccupied with surviving the Reaping. After the President died, Katniss sole responsibility was to feed her family and graduating school. Boys and relationships didn’t enter her frame of existence until a few moments ago when her fourteen year old sister brought it up. In fact the only guy in her inner circle was Gale and Katniss could not imagine him touching her.

She wasn’t the type of girl for public displays of affection. She just didn’t like to be touched.  Katniss didn’t even like hugs from her mother.

Her thoughts turned to Peeta. Asking Peeta to marry her was a rash decision. She really didn’t think about the other stuff Prim brought up. She never thought about marital relations between herself and Peeta. The idea itself wasn’t repulsive. She didn’t mind the way he smelled. From her observations throughout the years she found Peeta’s kind ways appealing, plus she favored the way he looked. Katniss enjoyed looking at him, watching him speak, even his voice was pleasant, it was mellow but masculine.

She pictured what it would be like to hold his hand and she felt a rush of warmth to her cheeks. She was tingly all over, much the way she felt that one time she shot a buck all by herself.

Would Peeta mind holding her hand? Katniss sat up in her bed and crept to the basin of water. It was a warm night, she splashed her cheeks with water. Her mind churned with thoughts and questions. What if what Prim said was right? Katniss asked herself. What if Peeta didn’t favor her, what if he wanted relations with others?

Katniss turned around in her bed, punching the pillow. The idea of Peeta sharing another person’s bed did not sit well with her.  There were things that needed to be discussed and as much as Katniss hated to talk, she was going to have an honest conversation with Peeta. She decided to sneak out early.

In the morning her plan to go see and speak to Peeta was thwarted by the rush of getting ready for the wedding. Her mother pulled out a white dress from her Merchant days. It had ruffled cap sleeves, scoop neckline, was gathered at the waist and trumpeted outward at the hem. It’s hemline was shorter in the front reaching past Katniss knees but the back was longer falling to her mid-calf. Her mother even had crinoline to put underneath her dress. Katniss’ hair was braided and pinned up in a crown around her head. Prim went to the herb garden and picked small flowers and wove them into her hair. Katniss didn’t even recognize herself in the mirror once her mother and sister were finished with her.

“This was the dress my family had made for me when I was supposed to get married to Peeta’s father, Lionel.” Her mother smiled over her shoulder in the mirror.

“You were engaged to Mr. Mellark?”

“Yes and I chose your father. It was a shock to the entire district that I chose to be with a miner, from the Seam.” Her mother chuckled, then her face became serious, “I did what was best for me, and you Katniss have to do what is best for you. Especially when dealing with Eileen.”

Katniss nodded.

“My advice to you is always keep Peeta in the loop about what’s going on in your head, especially when Eileen does something spiteful. Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship.” Her mother squeezed her shoulders.

Katniss didn’t have time to process the information as it was time to leave. When they opened the door there was Gale, Gale was standing there.

“I’m asking you once more,” Gale ran his hands through his hair, “to reconsider. He’s a Merchant Katniss, one of them!”

“Gale my mother is a Merchant,” Katniss pointed out. She was angered that Gale wouldn’t take the hint. Why couldn’t he accept the fact that she didn’t want him, they were too alike.

Gale glanced over her shoulder to her mother who stood just feet away. “I…”

“Which makes me a half-breed.” Biting back her anger she said, “Goodbye Gale.”

Katniss walked by him with her mother and sister right behind.

“Good for you,” her mother whispered.

“Gah,” Prim said, “Why does he smell so funny?”

Katniss began to laugh. She’d always thought the same thing. They passed a few people on the road who greeted them and wished her well. Others simply stared at her, because she never wore a dress or looked so clean. Katniss always looked like she’d rolled around in dirt for fun. Climbing trees to make a shot had its perils and one of them was getting dirty.

When they arrived at the Justice Building the Mellarks were waiting for them outside.

“Maggie,” Mr. Mellark greeted, “Primrose, and my dear Katniss.” His mood was jovial.

Mrs. Mellark rolled her eyes and gave them a curt nod.

River Mellark was dressed smartly and oddly did not appeared to be drunk, he and Haymitch Abernathy the old Victor were known as the town drunks. “Ladies.”

“Lionel, how are you?” her mother greeted.

“Peeta is inside no doubt wearing a hole in the floor.” Mr. Mellark clapped his hands.

They walked up the stairs and made their way into the building. All around Katniss everyone was speaking in excited tones except for Peeta’s mother. She mutely walked behind everyone. Katniss didn’t want to think about Prim’s conversation or the fact that Peeta’s mother was probably shooting daggers at her back. The woman was probably upset to have lost the control of the bakery. Her demand was that Peeta had to get married. She never stipulated that he had to marry a merchant girl. Katniss tried not to pay attention to the old witch, as long as Peeta’s mother kept her mouth shut everything would be fine. Her concentration was on signing the papers so that Peeta could become the new owner of the bakery. Once that happened Gale would surely disappear from her life.

She came around the corner and there was Peeta dressed in his best suit. He looked nervous. The moment their eyes met he smiled and it caused her to smile back. He looked wonderful, like one of those posters they used to use for the Hunger Games where they depicted a good looking strong young man filled with youth and vigor. Peeta walked toward her and her heart skipped a beat.

“Shall we?” Peeta held his hand out to her.

For some reason her knees shook and Katniss reminded herself this was all her idea. She forced her shaky hand to reach for his and he gave her hand a gentle squeeze to reassure her. Taking a deep breath she took her first step toward him and allowed herself to follow him into the room where the officiant was performing weddings. There were five couples ahead of them. Each ceremony took twenty minutes.

When it was their turn, Katniss’ nerves got the better of her and her mind went blank. The only thing that kept her anchored to the room was the man standing beside her. His voice was the only voice that she heard. He gave her hand another gentle  squeezed when she needed to speak and put his arms around her to comfort her when they were signing the papers.

“You’re doing great,” Peeta whispered in her ear as she signed the last document.

Katniss glanced up at him and he gave her a reassuring smile. Peeta signed right next to her. And with that they were married according to the laws of Panem. But until the toasting took place the marriage wasn’t considered legal before the eyes of the district. This thought caused Katniss to have more anxiety.

“Congratulations!” Primrose tackled her from behind, and Katniss jumped. Prim was the only person who had the ability to surprise her. She behaved so much like her darned cat Katniss was surprised her sister didn’t purr at times.

“Thanks Prim.”

“Just remember to speak to Peeta about you know what.” Prim smiled like the cat who stole the cream as she turned to Peeta.

Katniss was sure everyone could see how flushed she looked because she could feel the warmth rushing to her cheeks.

“Please call me Lionel, now that we’re family!” Mr. Mellark said enveloping her in a big bear hug.

“Okay, dad let go of Katniss before you suffocate her,” Peeta came to her rescue.

Katniss gave her father-in-law a nervous smile, she wasn’t sure she could ever call him anything but Mr. Mellark.

“We should get going, there is a feast to be had!” Mr. Mellark said.

The entire party left the Justice building and walked toward the bakery where  Peeta’s older brother Carlton waited with his wife. The Cartwrights waited for them as well as Madge. At the bequest of her mother the Hawthornes were present. Gale was sulking in the background, like a sullen black rain cloud.  

With all of their family and friends gathered in the backyard of the bakery Katniss didn’t know how they were going to get through the rest of the day without a Toasting. The stress of it all was the equivalent to her hauling a stag all by herself, an adult male deer could weigh between 120 pounds to 330 pounds.

There was a feast with squirrel stew, roasted rabbitts, medlies of garden vegetables, honied roasted carrots, potatoes made three ways, mashed, baked, and boiled, fresh bread, and a beautiful cake decorated like a meadow. Each family brought something to eat. Everyone began serving heaps of food onto their plates.

Katniss couldn’t eat, she wanted to find time to speak to Peeta alone. She never got the opportunity because she was constantly whisked away, because the Mellark’s neighbors came by to bid Peeta and her well wishes. Peeta marrying a girl from the Seam wasn’t why they came to the wedding reception. Many were familiar with her as they bought or traded for her fresh game. It was the curiosity of seeing Peeta married that made them come.

“Peeta.” Katniss was finally sitting next to him, a plate of food before her. She couldn’t find enjoyment in the meal. She was pushing the food around on her plate.

“What’s wrong?” Peeta said.

“They’re all expecting a Toasting,” she whispered.

“It’s okay I’ve got this covered.”

“You do?” Katniss eyes searched the gathered crowd. The only one who wasn’t participating was Gale. He was sitting next to Delly Cartwright who was chirping away.

Peeta put his hand over her’s and once more for the hundredth time he gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

“We’re a team, allies, right?”

Katniss breathed easier. He was right, they were a team. Although she proposed this crazy scheme, he agreed to it and was making it happen. She relaxed and began to eat and enjoy herself.

As the meal was finishing Peeta stood up and addressed everyone, “I know it’s a custom for the bride and groom to have a Toasting on their wedding day. However among the Merchants its a custom to wait a month for the Toasting to allow the couple to get acquainted and to test if the marriage is a good match. Katniss and I have made this agreement.”

Katniss saw Gale perk up. He was staring straight at her. Katniss instead looked at her sister. Prim’s face wasn’t all too happy, she was scowling. Katniss glanced at her mother who looked stoic. In fact as she glanced around the only other person who looked okay with Peeta’s announcement was his mother.

Katniss stood up knowing she had to do something to distract the crowd. Standing on tiptoes she braced her hands against his chest and place the kiss on his lips. It was her first kiss and she didn’t know what to expect. She’d heard rumors about how wondrous kisses were. Katniss didn’t expect for currents of electricity to run throughout her body and make her feel as if she was on fire. She was dazed and her knees gave out at the simple peck on the lips. Peeta’s arms were there to catch her.

The simple kiss had the desired effect, everybody was standing and cheering. She looked at Peeta whose face was bright red and Katniss was sure hers was in the same condition. Her cheeks stung from heat that raced to her face.

That night after the meal, the dancing, and the subsequent cleanup, Prim pulled Katniss aside. “You’ve got to talk to him, you have to ask him questions.”

“Prim we’re going to be okay.” Katniss thought about how she and Peeta were a team. It reassured her they could overcome any obstacles.

“Look, you’re my sister and the same way you’ve been looking out for me all of my life, I have to look out for you too.” Prim’s face was serious.

“What’s wrong Prim?”

“Tonight I heard a few rumors.” Prim took a big breath then said, “The only reason he said yes to you , a girl from the Seam, was to get back at his mother. Everyone knows Mrs. Mellark doesn’t like Seam Folk. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

It was true Peeta’s mother did not like people from the Seam, she treated them poorly, and made them come to the back of the bakery to trade.

“Even if this is an agreement between you two, if you want this to work out,  you need to have a serious conversation with him and it has to happen before the 30 days are over.” Prim sighed heavily. “And just be careful of Gale. Peeta’s announcement made him perk up like Buttercup when he sees a mouse.”

Katniss was back to feeling all out if sorts as she watched her sister leave.

“Hey, stop frowning, it’s your wedding day,” Peeta said, coming to stand beside her.

Katniss took a deep breath and inhaled his scent. The smell of fresh bread, dill, and cinnamon calmed her down.

“Okay son,” Mr. Mellark said interrupting them. “The place is all yours. Your mother and I applied for housing when you graduated. We picked up our keys this morning, and while you came down here to finish the paperwork Carlton helped us move into the new house. We have a nice little cottage near the edge of town. Your brother River elected to convert a small shed at the back of the house into his living quarters. I’ve told your mother she is not to set foot in the bakery. I would like to continue to work in the bakery on a part time basis, if that is okay with you?”

Peeta took the keys, his eyes watered. “I think that could work.”

“Thank you, I just need to be able to get out of the house.” Mr. Mellark cleared his throat. “River decided he wants to continue to work there until he find something else for himself.”

Katniss stood to the side half listening to the conversation between Peeta and his father.

“That’s great you guys can show Katniss the ropes when I do not have time,” Peeta said.

“I’m proud of you son, for holding out for what you want. It’s not easy standing up for yourself, not willing to become a part in her game. Your mother is a force to be reckoned with. You’ve set a precedence for Mellark men, son.” Mr. Mellark dragged Peeta into a bear hug.

While Peeta and his father hugged Mrs. Mellark slithered next to her. “My son is not like other men, he’s never had a girlfriend, never batted an eye at another girl. He rejected every single one of the girls that I chose for him and yet you come around and he wants to get married in less than a day. And now he wants to wait thirty days to have is Toasting.” She cackled. “Good luck having children, though by the looks of you I doubt you could carry a Mellark full term…if he ever desires to touch you.”

His mother’s words shocked her and gave her doubts about Peeta’s reason for accepting her proposal. She wondered if he did it out of spite for his mother. If that were true then he would tire of the partnership that they formed earlier. These thoughts plagued her for the rest of the afternoon. And that night as she stood in the bathroom, Katniss hoped everything her sister said and his mother said was wrong. She’d unpacked her meager belongings and stored them in the closet that was inside of the bathroom.

Her mind went over the kiss once again. Hours later and she was still affected by it. It brought up the idea of the marital bed and the things that happened in it and other possibilities. Even though she was sure she didn’t want children now, she admitted to herself  further down the line she would like to have one small boy or girl with blond hair and Peeta’s eyes. Her hand flutters down to her stomach.

The idea of motherhood wasn’t something she often wanted or thought about but she wouldn’t mind with Peeta. The question remained would he want her to carry his children. For that to happen they would need to do stuff to the other. Maybe she was wrong maybe she should have agreed to marry Gale. At least he would want to talk to her. He would want her and desire to have kids.

However, as soon as a thought came to her mind about Gale she was repulsed and rejected that idea. “Ugh, that’s so gross.”

Taking a deep breath she exited the bathroom and found Peeta had made a pillow barrier, separating the two sides of the bed. Both had individual blankets and sheets.  “Oh.”

Peeta rushed across the room, “I thought this would be more comfortable for both of us.”

Katniss straightened her shoulders. The truth was evident by the amount of pillows on the bed. This was going to be her life, the one she chose, until death do they part. Glancing at him, it occurred to her maybe they could be friends, companions of sorts. Katniss told herself that wouldn’t be that bad and she didn’t want children anyways so at least she would never have to worry about avoiding unwanted pregnancies. However before she resigned herself to a platonic marriage, they did need to have an open and honest discourse about their expectations for the marriage. Tonight was not the night to have it she was exhausted and oddly disappointed. 

Putting on a brave face she asked, “Which side do you prefer sleeping on?”

“The window side, if you don’t mind, because I get hot at night.”

“Works for me.” Katniss said climbing into the bed, while Peeta opened the window and got into bed.

She thought she would never go to sleep, but the moment her head hit the pillows she was a goner.

It was the morning light that woke her. She was still half-asleep but she found she couldn’t move as if there was a barrier in her way, much like when Prim climbed into bed with her after a nightmare. She was comfortable and felt like she was at home.

Her only problem was that eventually she had to go to the bathroom.

“Prim,” she murmured her mind was holding her into thinking she was at home. It was the smell of fresh bread, cinnamon and dill that made her eyes pop open. She was being spooned by Peeta. With her hunter like reflexes she rolled out of bed. Sometime during the night the pillows that separated them were tossed onto the floor and and they met in the middle holding each other throughout the night.

Katniss touched her cheeks and her fingers smelled like his. Her lashes flutters closed with delight. This was an a side effect she could get used to. On the bed Peeta groaned, Katniss panicked and flew into the bathroom.

Once in the safety of the bathroom she took a good look at herself in the mirror. Her face was flushed with a glow she’d never seen. Her gray eyes looked luminous and she she felt achy all over as if her body wanted to be back in Peeta’s arms.

Sleeping with him was not a hardship. Smiling, she thought this would be hers. This small space of time when she didn’t have to worry about his preferences.  This was her niche and she could find happiness here. But as she got ready for the day she knew they still needed to talk. She quietly crept into the room and found him asleep on his side. Katniss gathered the pillows from the floor and created the barrier that he had made last night before leaving the room.

She went downstairs to the bakery and smiled when she saw Peeta’s father and River working. One glance at her and his father grinned. “My son put that glow upon your pretty cheeks.”

Katniss didn’t know where to look, she was so embarrassed. Demurely she asked, “Is it okay if I go hunting?”

“By all means go hunting. My son likes the squirrel meat you catch with your arrow. He’s always fascinated by the way you manage to shoot them through the eyes.”

Katniss thanked him and made her way out of the bakery. She headed for the woods. Finding her bow, she set off to hunt. Sometime later she had fishes, rabbits, birds, and a few squirrels.

Satisfied with her hunt she went first to her home and dropped off a rabbit for her sister and mother, even though no one was home. Next she went trading, first to the hob, then to the merchants. Everyone seemed so happy for her and congratulated her on her wedding.

It was around 3 in the afternoon when she arrived back at the bakery. Her father-in-law was happy when she handed him a nice fat goose.

“She’s a keeper,” he sang.

She smelled Peeta before she saw him.

“I’ve never seen my father so happy before.” Peeta’s arms were dusty from flour and Katniss had a sudden urge to run her hands up and down her arms. She jammed her hands in her pockets. “My dad really likes you.”

“I’m glad.” Katniss hoped the warm sting of her flush could be attributed it to the heat found in the bakery.

“So would you like for me to make dinner?”

Peeta washed his arms and Katniss noticed the he turned the hot water and the cold water handles. She became fascinated with the way he washed his hands and arms. She shook her head, by now Peeta was at a counter preparing to make something.

“Nope, I can make dinner.” Katniss stopped moving remembering the hot and cold tap. Shyly she asked, “Is it true you have hot water?”

“The water is always hot. The ovens heats the pipes.”

“Even in the dead of winter?” This was surreal for her.

“Even in the dead of winter.”

At home they had water but it was cold and it needed to be heated up to take a warm bath. Many buckets have to be heated on the pot belly stove and poured into the tin bathtub. She glanced at Peeta, asking for permission.

Peeta chuckled, “Go enjoy.”

She didn’t even blink she ran up the stairs. This was another thing that she could fully enjoy. Hot water was a luxury.

She turned the tap of the bathtub and felt the warm water gushing into the bath. Within seconds she was sighing into the hot water. Normally she didn’t do this. She was efficient, she scrubbed herself down quickly because often her sister and she shared a bath. This was decadent, she took a little longer scrubbing her limbs.

This wasn’t something Katniss did always but she promised herself she would do this at least once a week if not once a month. Getting dressed in clean clothes she began to cook. Soon the meal was done and Peeta came upstairs he was tired but he ate quietly and yawned a few times.

Katniss anticipated once more going to bed. In the morning the same thing happened again. In fact for the next few days it happened over and over again. Each morning Katniss enjoyed waking up wrapped up in Peeta’s arms. She loved smelling like him. She loved the way his breath felt on her neck. She loved staring at his long, nearly translucent eyelashes and she wondered how they never tangled. On Saturday she found her sister at home.

“Katniss,” Prim squealed giving Katniss a bear hug.

“Hey little duck,” Katniss greeted even though Prim was taller than her, and acted like a know-it-all-like her cat. “I haven’t seen you since Tuesday.”

“I’ve been busy helping mom, and I’ve been helping out Vick at the school.”

“Gale’s baby brother?” Katniss turned up and eyebrow.

“Oh my goodness you are glowing?” Prim turned the tables on Katniss she came close to her and inspected her face. “I’ve never seen you like this before.”

Katniss couldn’t help the happiness she felt. She felt tingly all over. Waking up in Peeta’s arms each morning was as great as eating a hearty bowl of stew on a chilly day.

“I’m assuming you spoke to Peeta and you guys are on the same page?”

Katniss busied herself with taking out the fish and goose she’d caught for her mother and sister. She took elaborate lengths to put them down on the table, as she tried to find the words to explain to her sister what was happening to her and the status of her relationship with Peeta. She opened and closed her mouth several times but nothing came out. This was a situation where she needed Peeta to speak for her. He was so much better at words and expressing himself.

“Katniss are you trying to tell me you haven’t spoken to him yet?” Her sister stood arms akimbo.

Katniss said in a high-pitched wimpy voice, “No.”

Katniss had never seen her baby sister get mad. It was a sight to see, but she became red and her eyes narrowed. She gave her that legendary Everdeen scowl.

“Oh for crying in the mud,” Prim said stomping over to the medicine cabinet, much the way her cat would thump it’s paws when it angrily walked away. Prim took a couple packets of her tea mixtures. “Here boil a third of each package, and drink the tea each morning without stopping.”

Katniss sniffed the package and by its smell she knew what they were used for. “I’m not having relations with Peeta.”

“You may not be having ‘relations,’ as you call it right now with Peeta, but by the look of you it won’t be long.” Prim held her hand up as she walked Katniss to the door. “Don’t  try to argue with me. I would rather you be safe than sorry since you’re both not ready for kids. But you really should have a conversation with him in regards to your expectations of the relationship, and if after this trial period you want to separate, stay together in name only, or have a Toasting and make a go out of a real marriage.”

Katniss stood outside looking at her front door wondering what just happened. She’d come here to drop off food but she got scolded, medically diagnosed, and advised in the space of minutes. Looking at her hands she slipped the small packets in her pocket before heading back to the bakery. As she walked through the meadow her sisters words had a deep impact, what if Peeta wanted to separate at the end of the 30 days. His mother wanted him to get married and he did so that the bakery was his now.

Katniss asked herself what she would do, if that happened? She couldn’t find an answer. She did know however then if Peeta didn’t want to do a Tosting with her she could remain in the way that they were right now. The more she thought about it, it became apparent she was happy.

As for the other possibility of them having a Toasting right now that was as far away as the Moon. As she arrived at the bakery after selling her goods she noted how busy they all were. She washed up, went downstairs and helped with little things like cleaning the dishes and making sure the surfaces were clean so that they didn’t have to do that.

That night right before she fell asleep Peeta spoke to her. “Thank you for pitching in today. We were able to end the day earlier because of your help.”

“You’re welcome.” Her smile was so wide her hands clutched the pillow. Katniss was happy she could help him in some small way. Back home with her mother and sister she was always in the way and she didn’t have the tolerance to deal with the sick.

The next day was Sunday. Katniss woke up extra early. She wanted to catch something special for her boy with the bread. Also she didn’t want to run into Gale after what she observed at the reception.

Normally Mr. Mellark would be downstairs to greet her. Today the bakery was silent. After four days of marriage she discovered the bakery was always busy and noisy. The Mellarks never took a break. Lunch was a quick piece of bread with a cup of water.  If the miners were allowed a 30 minute lunch then Peeta and his family deserved the same. Katniss had in mind to speak to Peeta about giving each one of them a break or even closing down for lunch. It would help them in the long run.

It was still dark when she stepped outside. It was beginning to get chillier. Fall will soon be upon them and Katniss’ mind turn to saving up for the winter. She could make jerky to help them during the long months. She could also ask her mother to help her can vegetables.

As she slipped underneath the fence, she thought about asking Peeta if she could share the food that she preserved with her family. Peeta was generous and by extension so was his father. River, however, was still a mystery to her. While he did like to drink, she’d seen him frequenting Rippers white liquor booth at the Hob, when he was at the bakery he didn’t even smell of alcohol. He worked just as hard as his father and Peeta.

Grabbing her bow she made her way into the woods. By now the sun was rising and the forest became alive with the sounds of birds chirping. She went to the lake and after setting her nets she set out to hunt. As the sunlight became stronger, she shot a few geese, then she shot a couple of  rabbits and squirrels. Her biggest catch was a turkey. They were easy prey as long as they weren’t running. They were as fast Mr. Henderson’s old jalopy, a car left over from the dark days.

With her turkey in hand she sat down to check her nets. Greasy loved the fresh fish. Her customers liked the summer delicacy fried. Satisfied with the amount of fish, she decided to go back to the bakery. Normally she would head to her mother’s, but it was still early. Her sister and mother would still be sleeping.

She was headed toward the tree where she hid her bow and arrows.

“I see you went hunting without me, Catnip.”

Gale’s voice made her flinch. She turned around looking for him. She couldn’t spot him. A leaf drop from the sky, most likely he was hiding in a tree.

“What do you want Gale?” Katniss took a step back, his smell made her stomach turn.

“I wanted to have a talk with you.” He squinted up at the sun. “Why didn’t you want a Toasting with Mellark?”

“That’s my private business with my husband.” Katniss said watching Gale carefully.

Gale chuckled, took a step forward, and waved his finger in her face. “That’s a lie and you know it. Let’s be honest Katniss, before the eyes of the district, Mellark isn’t really considered your husband. Everyone knows you’re not married, not until you have a Toasting.”

Katniss hated the grin on his face, he made her mad. “In the eyes of the laws of Panem I am married.”

“This is District Twelve Katniss. Around these parts folks consider what you and Peeta are doing a sin. They believe you’re shacking up with the baker’s son and that once he tires of you he’s going to toss you out into the streets.  Katniss can’t you see he’s using you. If he wanted you he would have Toasted with you the day you signed the paperwork at the Justice Building.”

“I asked him not to Toast with me Gale and he agreed because he’s a gentleman.” Katniss said through clenched teeth. She couldn’t believe Gale was questioning her life with Peeta. It was none of his business!

Gale mercilessly laughed. “You’re so freaking naive. He knows you don’t want a real marriage, Katniss. He knows you don’t want kids that’s why he agreed to only sign the papers. He doesn’t care for you the way I do. He doesn’t know you the way I do. Hell he doesn’t want you the way I do.”

Gale reached out to touch her and she took several steps backwards. She was angered by his dogged persistence. She’d been telling him ‘no’ in various ways for the better part of three years. She’d hoped by going through the ceremony at the Justice Building with Peeta, signing the paperwork, and having the reception, Gale would understand that she was off limits. Yet here she was, once again, having the same tired conversation.

“We could be so good together, me and you we are the same, don’t you see Katniss can’t you see…how much I want you.”

“Anytime you talk to me all you say is how much you want me as if I’m something to be had.” She yelled, “A possession for you to put in your house like a trophy.”

“Is that what he’s told you? That you’d be a trophy!” Gale grabbed her by the forearm and growled at her.

His eyes looked feral and his grip hurt her arms, yet, Katniss stood her ground. “Let me go Gale!”

“Mellark won’t ever give you kid, or a chance at a real marriage. I can give you that.” Gale moved in to kiss her. He murmured as he leaned down, “He’s soft, using you to get back at his mother.”

Katniss kicked him in the shins. He fell like a tree being cut down by an expert lumberjack from District Seven. She quickly notched an arrow, aiming her bow at his chest.

“Peeta is a wonderful man. He’s gentle and kind and he loves his family. And if you touch me or do anything to me I can go to Darius and he can have you locked up.”  

Gale put his hands up.

She walked backwards until she was near the fence wanting to get away from Gale she went underneath the fence and ran toward the bakery.

Luckily it was still early enough, none of her neighbors saw her slip into the backyard. River was outside when he spotted her running. Her nerves were still strung high and she aimed her loaded bow at River.

“Hey Katniss…don’t worry, I’m not spying. It’s my turn to clean the ovens with Peeta.” He greeted, but his look turned to concern.

Katniss was shaking with anger, shock, and a myriad of other emotions she couldn’t identify. Uncharacteristically of her she burst into tears. Her knees gave way and she dropped to the ground.

River sat by her but didn’t touch her. His silence was comforting. As she calmed down he gave her a handkerchief. “You want to tell me what happened out there in the woods?”

“How did you know I was in the woods?” Katniss blew her nose.

“Well besides all the dead carcasses you have in your game bag, and the turkey you dropped as you ran into the back yard, not to mention the twigs and leaves adorning your head, you’re still carrying your bow and arrows.” River was examining her weapon. “You’re so tiny, how the heck do you pull that string back far enough to catch birds in mid flight? And how in hell do you get them right through the eye…”

River’s comments made her chuckle. Although he was curious he was also very serious. “I had an altercation with Gale in the woods.”

“Did he hurt you?” Although his voice was calm his eyes we’re not, they raging with fire.

“Don’t tell Peeta he tried to kiss me.”

“I don’t think my brother needs to know about Gale. The last time Gale put his hands on you, Peeta put Gale in the type of headlock that can cause you to lose consciousness. I shudder to think what my baby brother would do if he found out Gale tried to kiss you.”

“He did grab and squeeze my shoulders, but I kicked him in the shins. He let go when he fell backwards.” Katniss admitted, “I kind of, notched an arrow and pointed my bow at him.” When she lifted her arm to show him how easily she could notch her bow she grimaced in pain, her shoulders hurt. Gale had hurt her.

“Good for you.” River got up and pulled a small glass jar with a Capitol label on it from his pocket. Go inside get washed up and put some of this medication on the bruises. It should clear up by tomorrow.” He took her bow and began walking toward the the cellar.

“Where are you going?”

“I going to hide your weapon in the cellar. Then I am going to get Carlton. It’s time we had a chat with Gale. He has to understand even if you and Peeta don’t have a Toasting, you’re still my baby brother’s wife. And no one should ever put a hand on you. Oh and Katniss, not everything you hear is true.”

Katniss nodded. She went inside, luckily Peeta was still asleep. Katniss felt disgusting, Gale’s scent was all over her and she hated it. She scrubbed her body from head to toe. Her shoulders were tender and the bruises on her arm looked violent a mixture of red and purple shades. The white gel like content of the glass jar River gave her immediately took away her pain. By the time she dried her hair and dressed, the bruising was fading. Peeta was awake and was making breakfast.

The moment she saw him she bit her bottom lip to keep from telling him what had happened.

Peeta gave her a brilliant smile and opened his arms up to her. Katniss did not waste any time and when he wrapped his arms around her she felt safe like when she was a kid with her father. She sniffled.

“Hey you okay?” His voice was tender.

“I feel like I’m home.” It was important for her to tell him how she felt.  

Peeta gently rubbed her back, and embraced her tighter.

Monday morning it rained and Katniss was glad she didn’t have to go into the woods. Both Carlton and River showed up at the bakery. They had busted lips but had goofy grins on their faces.  

“WHERE IS THE LITTLE SEAM BRAT!” Mrs. Mellark blew into the bakery as if she’d flew in with the easterly wind guiding her broom.

“Now dear,” Mr. Mellark began.

Mrs. Mellark marched right up to Katniss. Mr. Mellark stood in her path. “You stupid man get out of my way,” she screeched.

Carlton, River, and Peeta came out from the back, all three stood behind their father. One Mellark was taller than the next. Katniss wasn’t sure what to make of the situation.

Mr. Mellark cleared his throat once more before he began speaking. “I thought you said you wouldn’t step a foot in the bakery, it’s not our property any more. Now take a deep breath and tell me what has brought you here on this lovely morning.”  

“My Carlton stayed out all night and I am sure that little -”

“Watch what you say about Katniss, mom,” Carlton warned cutting off his mother.

“She’s a Mellark,” River supplied.

Katniss peeked her head around the Peeta’s side. She could see the woman’s eyes narrow, her lips puckered disapprovingly, as if she got a fly caught in her teeth while flying over here. Katniss had enough of hiding, she wasn’t one to cower behind men.

“If you have something to say, say it to my face,” Katniss said moving in front of the men.

“You’re a bad influence,” Mrs. Mellark spat.

“No she’s not,” Peeta countered.

“I think Katniss is the best thing that happened to our family.” River raised an eyebrow.

“Dad’s happier, River comes to work on time. Heck, he was here yesterday early to clean the ovens. The business is making money with Peeta in charge, its up a good 12 percent,” Carlton said. “The books don’t lie. I came by to balance them today.”

“Have you all lost your mind?” Mrs. Mellark’s voice sounded strangled.

“Mom, Katniss is my wife, and I can assure you we spent the entire day and night  together,” Peeta said.

“She did go out hunting yesterday,” Carlton said.

“But she didn’t trade with anyone. She brought all of the game home to share with us. I can’t wait to eat that turkey!” River rubbed his belly.

“She caught a turkey?” Peeta’s mother eyed her, though something in the woman’s eyes was different there was no malice behind the her harsh words, almost as if she was impressed. The woman was known as a witch. She wasn’t friendly and she was known to hurt her kids. Katniss puzzled over her behavior.

“Shot it right through the eye,” River boasted.

“She’s quite the marksmith,” Peeta said.

“Are all of you telling me you like that dirty…”

“Mother, please refrain from saying anything that later on you will regret,” Carlton warned. “Katniss is a-”

“Mellark,” all three said at the same time.  Katniss watched a myriad of emotions flash through Mrs. Mellark’s face from anger, to disbelief, to astonishment.

“She’s a good, hard-working girl who will pitch in the bakery, even after spending all morning hunting. She even cooked food for our lunch today.” River winked at Katniss.

“Plus still helps out her mom and sister,” Peeta said.

“Dear, you see Katniss is blameless of whatever imagined crime you were going to accuse her of.” He placed a kiss on Mrs. Mellark’s forehead. “Now I don’t know what these two knuckleheads were doing, but look at them, dear, when was the last time we saw our boys seem united. River and Carlton haven’t threatened each other.”

“Yeah, and River had one drink mom. He restrained himself last night, took care of me.” Carlton shrugs, “We settled our differences.”

“It’s true dear; after Katniss agreed to marry Peeta you and I both know River has come home with me after work. He wants to help with the orphaned children. He and I have been making plans to help the kids transition out, find them jobs, help feed them.”

“It’s true mom,” River said. “I’ve been sober for the past two months. After Peeta made his decision to not marry I started to ask myself if I wanted to be like Abernathy. I didn’t and if Peeta could get what he wanted so could I. It wasn’t easy, but last night was the first time I touched a drink in two months, and I didn’t even drink it. I asked the bartender to give me sarsaparilla.”

Mrs. Mellark inspected each one of the men before she crackled a laugh.

Katniss was confused by her mother-in-law’s quick turn around.

“I’ve been trying to make this lot act like men for years and suddenly because of you they are,” she grinned wickedly. “I would like some tea, preferably chamomile.”

Katniss turned to Peeta and his brothers, whose mouths hung ajar.

“I told you your mother liked Katniss,” Mr. Mellark whistled.

Katniss made Mrs. Mellark some tea and joined her as she told Katniss how she had to toughen up her boys because their cousins used to beat them. She wanted her boys to be tough, and was surprised when  all of them stood up to her. She stayed for lunch and behaved civilly. Mrs. Mellark, turns out, was taking full advantage of her retirement. She loved her bridge club, her gardening, her knitting club, and her future travelers club. She was planning on taking a trip to each of the districts. She even hinted at grandchildren which made all three of her children extremely uncomfortable.

Katniss was amazed when she left with Carlton in tow. River said he’d never seen his mother act so human, and asked Katniss what sedative she’d put in her tea. Before he left he took Katniss to the side.

“Don’t worry about any guy being rude or mean to you, we’ve got you. I know you’re capable of shooting them through the eye, but I don’t want you to be imprisoned. I like what you’ve done to my family.” River grinned patted her head and left.

With her secret safe, Katniss continue her path with Peeta. After her admission on Sunday they began talking, about their likes dislikes, favorite colors. It happened at night when they had the house to themselves.

They were in bed lying on their respective sides of the bed, the pillow barrier between them.  

“So you want us to take a break after the midday rush?” Peeta sat up and peered over the pillow barrier.

“You’re so tired when you drag yourself upstairs, you yawn during dinner. If you had a half-hour so that you could rest, you’d feel better at the end of the day.” Katniss could see Peeta weighing her case. “Especially your father. He’s not the young man he used to be.”

“Dad does take longer to do things.”

“I would do the cooking, I can make something fresh or reheat leftovers for all three of you.”

“My mom never let us have a break. It’s why we work the way we do, but my mom is not the boss anymore. She hasn’t set foot here since the day we married.” He scratched his chin. “Alright, we’ll start tomorrow? So what’s on the menu?”

Katniss smiled shyly. “Is there anything you would like to eat?”

“I personally love your squirrel stew. Or a fried rabbit sandwich.” Peeta laid down and his stomach rumbled.

“Sounds like you could use a snack now.” Katniss got up.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to make you a sandwich; you’re still hungry.”

Peeta grinned and sprang from the bed. Katniss laughed at his antics. He wiggled his eyebrow. “What, I plan on growing nice and fat.” After this Peeta stopped making the pillow barrier, and they would ease their way closer to each other as they talked and fell asleep in each other’s arms.

The third week when she couldn’t go hunting, because it was thundering outside she cleaned the bakery and often found herself watching as Peeta made bread. His hands were fascinating tools.

Her heart fluttered every time he walked into the room. Her cheeks became heated when he touched her hand or brushed her hair away from her face. There were times her insides would grow warm and mushy when he placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

They were preparing to go to bed and talking about the bakery. “I got word today and that the Capitol wants to get rid of the flour that was given in Tesserae. I was thinking of buying some and seeing what bread I can make from it and maybe making it as an economy bread for the people who can’t afford a higher priced bread. I thought possibly to enrich it with raisin or nuts to make the loaf heartier.”

Katniss was slowly starting to realize just how much money went into making the baked goods they sold. “As long as you can keep the cost down, make the price affordable for the people who can’t buy the more expensive bread. It will be a great idea.”

“You really think so?”

“Tesserae flour is not as refined as the flour you get here for the bakery.” Katniss recalled those days. At the 74th games she would have had 20 slips in the bowl. When the president died and the games discontinued the government decided to give all of its workers a pay raise. The miners’ raise what’s so significant their weekly salary lasted longer. The quality of life changed and Tesserae was no longer needed.

“What does the flour look like?”

They were both in the bed by now, his window was opened, and the lights were turned off.

She thought about the flour that came in those packs. “It was grainy and harder to mix into bread. Most people made flat-breads or they use it as a thickener for soups and stews. They also made dumplings with it.”

“Thank you, that was very insightful.” He reached out and lightly touched her hand.

Katniss felt electrical currents running up and down her arm. Heat poured into her cheeks and she was glad the room was dark. He rolled to her and she didn’t waste time in settling her head on his chest. Listening to his heartbeat was as soothing as listening to a cool breeze filter through the trees in the woods.

A few nights later Peeta came out of the bathroom. “Green, your favorite color is green?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?”

“It does make sense; you do love the woods.”

“Thank you for letting Prim stay last night she enjoyed her hot bath.”

“Katniss, your sister is family, and as long as your mother is okay with it, she can stay over any time she wants.”

“Thank you.” Katniss gave him a shy smile. “Maybe tomorrow night you can show me the shade of orange you like?”

Peeta got into the bed but didn’t lie down as was his custom. “What else do you like?”

Katniss was puzzled by his question. It must have shown on her face because he said, “I know you’re deadly with a bow, but squeamish when it comes to injuries. I thought you were going to faint when you saw the blister on River’s hand as you tended to him.”

Katniss was embarrassed she nearly threw up several times.

“I know you prefer honey over sugar in your tea. I know you hate getting up early but do it anyways because the game you catch helps out everyone. By the way, Carlton would like for you to catch an extra squirrel he wants to make a three meat stew.”

“Consider it done.”

“But besides your favorite color and tea I don’t know what else you like.”

“I like cheese buns.” Katniss mouth watered as she recalled the taste of the savory cheesy roll.

“Cheese buns?”

“Anything with cheese really. Prim makes the best goat cheese and in the Spring and Summer she adds different herbs that make it taste unique.”

“Okay what else?”

“I like to read. I didn’t have much access to books in the Seam. After Snow died and the government sent all of the those books to the school  I used to pour over the books in the library during lunch. One time I snuck one out and took it with me to the woods to read.” Katniss said fondly.  “To this day the Diary of Anne Frank is my favorite.”

Peeta reached over to her and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Thank you for sharing.”

Katniss went to sleep and the next day when she came home from hunting her spirits were low. Gale ruined all of the traps he made for her. It began to down pour and she wasn’t able to catch much. She didn’t want to say anything to River because she knew they would want to have a ‘word’ with Gale. Katniss wanted to cut out the middleman and go directly to the power behind Gale. Her old hunting buddy was as stubborn as a mule but there was one person in the entire district he never dared cross, his mother.

She took a shower, despite wanting a bath. It was busy downstairs and they needed her help. After she was dressed and feeling a little better Katniss walked out of the bathroom, and frowned when she saw the box on the bed. It hadn’t been there when she walked in earlier. Curious, she walked up to it and saw a note.

“Please enjoy - Peeta.”

Opening the box she squealed when she saw the books. “She read out loud the titles as she picked up each book, “Catcher in the Rye, Pride and Prejudice, Of Mice and Men, Romeo and Juliet, Jane Eyre, A Christmas Carol, 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, The Lion The Witch and The Wardrobe, The Hobbit, The Fault in Our Stars, A Walk to Remember, The Notebook, Jurassic Park, Night.” She dug around some more and then her hands stopped and tears clouded her vision momentarily. In a shaky voice she said, “Diary of Anne Frank.”

Within seconds she was down the stairs. Like one of her arrows seeking it’s prey she sought out Peeta. Finding him she hugged him and placed small kisses over his face. “Thank you for the book!” Katniss said before hugging him and burying her face in his neck. His scent wound itself around her.

Peeta wrapped his arms around her, holding her. Both forgot he was in the front of the store helping out patrons with their purchases.

“Oh young love,” one of the women sighed. She turned to her husband, “Why don’t you do nice things for me?”

The husband replied, “Start kissing me like that and I’ll give you the moon.”

A few days later she was with her sister. They were putting the books away on the shelf the boys made. It took them three days to put three shelves up; shelves that fell to the floor by themselves. Katniss chuckled. All four of the Mellark men were experts with pastries and bread, but between them they could not figure out how to properly saw a piece of wood. Katniss and her sister ended up finishing the project.

“Where do you think Peeta found all of these books?”

“I don’t know Prim, but they magically appeared from one day to the next.”

“They must have cost him a lot of money.” Prim carefully touched one of the books with a paper cover.

“Prim,” Katniss sat down on the bed. “Do you think he likes me?”

Her sister spun around. “You haven’t had the talk with him yet?”

“No,” Katniss said embarrassed. They talked every night but not about the one subject they needed to talk about. She really did care about him in a way that was different than the love that she felt for her sister.

“Katniss, you can’t avoid this talk forever. Your 30 days are almost over and if you don’t have this talk with him he might not want to have a Toasting with you. Then you’ll never know unless you ask him what he wants.”

“I know, I know I should have the talk with him and ask him what he wants and how he feels about sex. But sometimes I just like being kept wrapped up, talking about other stuff with him.”

“Like what?”

“Everything,” Katniss shrugged. “We talked about everything, the weather, the bakery…you.”

Prim rubbed her face. “Vick said you weren’t going to chicken out.”

“Gale’s baby brother?” Lately her sister mentioned Vick increasingly in her conversations.”

“By the way Vick, said his mom pulled Gale’s ear and sent him to bed without his dinner. She was so mad to hear about what he was doin to you in the woods she prohibited him from hanging out with his mining buddies. She doesn’t like that they drink and he spends way too much of his salary at the slag heap. To ensure his buddies don’t get out of hand, she convinced his mining buddies’ wives and mothers to pick them up at the end of their shifts.”  

Katniss grinned. She knew Hazzelle was a no-nonsense kind of mom, who appreciated honesty. Katniss was brutally honest when she had a talk with Hazzelle, including why Carlton and River fought Gale. Hazzelle was madder than a hornet’s nest. “So you’re spending a lot of time with a boy who is two years younger.”

Her sister turned red. She had a guilty look on her face, much like her Buttercup did that one time he drank the goat milk Prim needed to make cheese.

“What’s going on between you and Vick?”

“Nothing, I know he’s so young, but he’s so different from his brothers…he’s just a friend.” Prim trailed off.

“You know what they say, when there’s smoke there’s fire,” Katniss said enjoying how the shoe was finally on the other foot.

“The same could be said of you and Peeta. I mean, look at all these books he got you. Something is there.”

Katniss wasn’t sure. They were growing closer but she didn’t know what it was between them. It could be friendship or a type of camaraderie; they were allies. Though lately she wanted to be kissed and touched. She wanted to know what ‘it’, was like. Did she simply lie there while he stuck his appendage inside? Was it supposed to feel good? Would she feel those electrical currents like when he placed kisses on her forehead or when he touched her hand.  Katniss wasn’t sure, but she did not want to discuss these things with her baby sister.

Katniss picked up the Diary of Anne Frank and clenched it tightly against her chest.

Prim sat by her. “You need to talk to him and you need to do it as soon as possible because at the end of the 30 days there is only three possible outcomes. You have a Toasting with him. He lets you go and you seperate. And the last option, stay in the same position. Yuu know there are those who have the same mindset as Gale who will try to take advantage of you or Peeta, and those who will shun you.”

Katniss knew what Primrose said  was true. She needed to put her fears aside and talk to Peeta about them, and her desires and whether or not he wanted to be with her, a girl from the Seam.

The Sunday before the 30 days were up, she felt ‘it’, his manhood pressing up against her bottom. Her body became damp down there, and her breasts ached for his touch. The bubble had burst as Katniss realized she wanted more out of the marriage. It was time to have the dreaded talk.

This time she did not get up from the bed as she had been doing for days. She waited for him to wake up. He moved closer to her and she held onto him knowing this would possibly be the last moment she would ever be this close with him.

As he awoke his breathing changed and his arm tightened around her momentarily before he became stiff and pushed away from her. The rejection hurt.

“Katniss…,” he stammered pushing his blond hair away from his face.

Katniss sadly sat up in bed. She held a pillow in her arms as a sort of fortification for her body, her heart, her mind, and spirit. “I’m not good with words, but I know we have to talk.”

He ran his hands through his hair in an agitated way. “Yeah, I know.”

Katniss closed her eyes and blurted, “Do you find me attractive, like in the way a man wants a female?”

“What?”

Katniss cracked open one eye to find Peeta staring at her slack jawed.

“I warned you I’m not good with words, and frankly I wouldn’t even know how it works between men and women in a situation like this, but if you don’t or can not want me because I’m from the Seam, then we’ve got to be honest to make this situation work for both of us.” She was so embarrassed she buried her face into the pillow. “I want sex with you!”

Peeta was a talker; she knew it from watching him at school. He always said the prettiest things. So she expected him to talk and say something brilliant. What she didn’t expect was the silence after her declaration. She waited with her face buried in the pillow for him to speak, hell for him to walk away. Nothing happened.

Just when she thought she was going crazy he began to laugh. Curiously, she looked up to see he was laughing so hard he fell over on the bed clutching his side with tears running down his face. 

Angered by his reaction to her gut-wrenching declaration she took the pillow and hit him with it several times.

“Hey,” he exclaimed.

One moment she had a pillow in the hand the next moment she was pinned underneath him, his hands on either side of her face, and her legs trapped by his. This poked at the embers of the fire she felt stirring when she kissed him on their wedding day.

Peeta lazily smiled at her. “You’re so pure and perfect for me.”

Katniss wasn’t sure what he meant by that but she was sure there was an insult in there. “ I’m not pure…I…I…want…”

“Go ahead say it. I dare you to but you can’t because you’re not built that way, and it drives me insane with lust for you.  Always has, always will.”

Katniss was confused.

“I asked my brother River to start the rumor that I didn’t want to get married. He did it because he knew I was in love with a girl I thought I could never have. I thought she was in a committed relationship. I didn’t want to end up like my father in a loveless marriage. I would rather be alone for the rest of my life. But my mother made it harder for me. She wouldn’t give me the bakery unless I married.”

It occurred to Katniss she was missing out on a great big joke.

She wanted him and he wanted some unattainable girl. Unwanted tears gathered in her eyes.  This was the other scenario her sister warned her about. “What’s her name? You know we haven’t Toasted yet. You can still have her in your life. Anything, as long as you’re happy.” Katniss figured someone should be happy in this relationship, and if not her, she wanted it to be him.

“This is why you’re so pure because you are willing to give up your own happiness for mine.” His eyes became soft, his voice tender, “I love you Katniss. I’ve I’ve loved you for so long, since I was a boy.”

“A boy,” Katniss whispered with awe and disbelief. “You’ve  loved me for that long?” The interior of her being burst into flames by those words.

“I heard you sing the valley song when we were kids and I was a goner. River used to make fun of me because I was so committed to you and you were with Gale.”

Katniss wrinkled her nose at hearing Gale’s name.

“The day you came to see me I thought I was going to lose the bakery. My mother was fed up with me and threatened she was going to hand the bakery to River.” He loosened his grip cupping her face.

He began placing small kisses on her face. Katniss wound her arms around his neck. Each kiss caused the embers to become brighter, the fire spread from her heart to her belly and to the tips of her toes. She glowed from a combination of his words and his kisses. Sweet kisses that made her hungry for more.

“When you proposed, I grabbed onto that and I wasn’t going to let you slip from my fingers. Had there been enough time I would have married you that same day. When Gale showed up I thought it was over for me but then I saw the way you had my back during the fight and I knew I had a real chance.”

“You don’t have competition anywhere Peeta.” She arched into him when he nuzzled her neck.

“I know that now.”

He kissed the her forehead, when her eyelashes fluttered closed he placed a kiss on each one. Katniss anticipated a kiss on her lips, but he traced the tip on her nose and her lips with his finger tip. Katniss’ breathing was erratic as if she had run a mile. Her body was hot, the nightgown she wore was suddenly itchy and cumbersome. Her lashes opened and she hoped he could see the heat.

He groaned at her fierce look. “You’re so beautiful. It’s been hell keeping my hands off of you.”

He gently kissed her bottom lip before slipping his tongue inside her mouth. She mewled at the contact of his mouth and the fire spread to the juncture of her thighs. She squirmed beneath him, until she could wrap her legs around his middle. He was hard and the friction felt good; the fire was beginning to get out of control.

Peeta sat back and she growled at the loss of contact, until she watched him tear his pajama top off exposing his muscled chest. For Katniss it was like Christmas. A little happy cry escaped her mouth when it dawned on her he wanted her to touch him. Her fingers eagerly reached out and touched his flesh. He was soft and warm, yet she could feel the hard muscle beneath her fingertips. She was drawn to the sprinkling of hair that ran down the middle of his chest. Without thought or preamble she began trailing little kisses on his chest following the line down.

Hearing him gasp and moan at her touches fueled the fire within her and the need to touch and be touched.

Peeta hands trailed down to the hemline of her nightgown. He paused as if asking her permission. By Nature she was shy, but she felt bold around Peeta and she took the hem and pulled her nightgown off over head and threw it into a corner.

He drew in a sharp breath and his blue widened and became dark at the sight of her near naked form. “You are beautiful.”

Embarrassed by his compliment she turned her face away. This was the moment she decided how to live the rest of her life. She could move forward with Peeta letting him have her body or she could cover herself up and deny what she desired.

Taking a big breath she laid back down and opened her arms to him. Her whole body was a flame, hot and bothered. The juncture between her thighs was wet and achy, with need. Her underwear was soaked.

He laid on top of her. “Are you sure? We don’t have to do anything until you’re ready.”

Katniss reached up and kissed him; it was all he needed. They touched and discovered and tasted the other and when it came time for her to receive him she didn’t feel the pain that she heard whispered about. His movements were at first cautious, but as he noted her enjoyment he became confident; each stroke meant to bring her to an unknown volcanic summit.

Katniss was burning, her skin and soul were as hot and radiant as the sun. As her entire existence seemed to burst into a pure beam of light, from her lips she shouted Peeta’s name. Her soul had found its home. She was loved, cherished, and desired by her boy with the bread.

As they came down Peeta asked her, “You love me real or not real?”

With all of the love that she felt in her being, she whispered, “Real.” 

***

Two days later, at midday their family gathered around the fireplace. It wasn’t a lavish affair, a private toasting which suited both Katniss and Peeta. Everyone gathered around them was happy as love filled the room. Katniss stood before Peeta smiling, her sister and mother stood by crying silent tears as Peeta finished toasting the bread. They each ripped off a piece and fed it to the other. They didn’t need the bread because they were already committed to the other, ready to have their better tomorrow.