#Ellis stop tormenting me please you got what you wanted

[hier--soir]

under the night | six

pairing: joel miller x f!reader, set in jackson after the end of tlou part I warnings/tags: [18+ minors DNI] language, being held captive, angst, serious violence, torture, injury, blood, discussions of murder, threat of sexual assault [DOES NOT HAPPEN], very brief discussion of religion/the bible, idk if you think i missed anything please let me know word count: 6k part five | series masterlist | main masterlist

Clink, clink.

Maria was drinking a cup of earl grey tea. The bergamot has a calming effect, she’d said, would you like a cup? Her spoon swirled in the teacup, bumping against the china every so often as she mixed in a sugar cube. The cup was pretty, a cream colour with pale pink gerbera flowers painted along the porcelain. Clink, clink; the spoon knocked the side of it again, the woman still unsatisfied by the granules of sugar visible in the dark liquid. It was the only sound in the room, bar the soft pattering of rain on the roof, as the four of them sat silently around Maria and Tommy’s dinner table.

Joel huffed in frustration as she finally lifted the spoon from the liquid and placed it gingerly on the saucer, before raising the cup to her mouth and taking her first sip. She sighed happily, relaxing in her chair as she savoured the taste.

“Okay,” she murmured, looking around the table.

“Oh, we can talk now?” Joel snapped, his exhaustion getting the better of him. “You’ve got your fuckin’ tea and now you’re ready?”

“Joel,” Tommy warned his brother quietly. “We’re all on the same side here.”

“Well, she could’ve fuckin’ fooled me,” he said spitefully in the woman’s direction. “It’s been days, and you haven’t ordered any searches, haven’t questioned anyone.”

Maria raised her hand to stop him, “It’s a delicate situation.”

“No, Joel’s right,” Cal spoke up. The bags under his eyes were heavy, hair greasy and slicked back off his forehead; the appearance of a man who hadn’t slept in days. “You run things here, and I always thought you did a damn good job of it too. But she’s gone missing, and you’re just sitting back and waiting? For what?” 

“Things are returning to normal here,” she said lowly. “People are calming down, and I don’t want to raise any alarm bells if I don’t need to.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Joel all but snarled.

“It means that I wouldn’t be surprised if she chose to leave,” she levelled at him, one eyebrow raised accusatorially. Clink, clink. He flinched as she dipped her spoon back into the cup, tapping it against the rim. “Ellie told me.”

Joel’s eyes darkened, his hand forming a fist below the table. “Told you what exactly?” 

Maria gave him a conspiratorial look. “She told me about being strangled, Joel. She came here a few days ago, upset after hearing the news, and we talked. Ellie worries that she might have left out of guilt… and I must admit, I wouldn’t be surprised if that were true.”

“Wait,” Cal’s eyebrows raised in alarm, eyes darting between Maria and Joel. “What the fuck are you talki-“

“No one was fuckin’ strangled,” Joel ground out, doing his best to stay calm. “Ellie wasn’t hurt. And she wouldn’t fuckin’ leave us; there’s no god damn way she’d even think to go outside those gates alone.”

Joel’s mouth twisted into a pained grimace at Maria’s insinuation, shaking his head jerkily. The last conversation he’d had with you played on his head in a constant loop, the image of your face distorted in despair, the feeling of your guilty tears on his neck – it tormented him. Kept him awake all night, and on edge all day. The idea that you might have decided to leave, out of a misplaced sense of guilt, or fear, or… or because of something he’d said. His chest tightened at the thought. He’d told you not to stay at the house if he wasn’t there, hadn’t he? That’s why you’d gone home alone that night, instead of coming back to him. It won’t happen again, is what you said. Joel mulled the words over in his mind endlessly, searching for a hidden meaning in your tone that he might have missed; a plan to leave him.

Tommy watched the three of them silently, the corners of his mouth downturned in dismay. To see Joel be so distraught was hard for him. Ellie had confided in Tommy that Joel had hardly spoken for the past three days. That he wasn’t sleeping, wasn’t eating. She kept a close eye on him and didn’t pry; simply sat quietly in whatever room he resided in, and just kept a watchful eye on him. Tommy couldn’t thank her enough for it. He’d watched his brother experience so much loss, so much heartache, and he cringed to realise they were witnessing it happen to him all over again.

“She wouldn’t leave me,” Cal broke the silence, his voice cracking on the last word. He reached up hastily to wipe the corner of his eye. ��We made an agreement when we first got here. If either one of us decides we aren’t happy, then we leave – together. No questions asked. She wouldn’t break a promise.”

Joel glanced at the younger man, absorbing his words with a blank expression. It still unnerved him sometimes; to gain further insights into the tightknit bond between you and Cal, but he pushed all negative feelings down, knowing the he was right.

“She’s still in Jackson,” Joel said with a tone of finality, straightening his shoulders.

“So what do you suggest we do?” Maria asked. “I’ve already asked so much of our community, I don’t know where I’m supposed to go from here.”

“Some fuckin’ community it is,” he muttered. “Women gettin’ stolen out of their god damn homes.”

Tommy gave him a look that said, not helpful. Joel ignored him.

“We question them – all of them,” he asserted. “Ransack every fuckin’ house in this town if we have to. She’s here somewhere – whoever’s doin’ this can’t keep her hidden for long.”

Maria nodded slowly, sparing a short glance in her husband’s direction. “We’ll question people then. If we go to the right ones, someone is bound to spill something.”

Tommy stared at his brother, taking in the way he stared intensely at the woman. “You can’t be a part of it though,” he said softly. Joel’s head snapped in his direction, eyes narrowing.

“Tommy,” he glared, only to be quickly interrupted.

“You’re too high strung, both of you are,” Tommy said, glancing between Joel and Cal. “If you’re out there knockin’ down doors, you’re just gonna scare people off, and somebody will get hurt. We can’t risk you two causing a scene.”

“We can’t just sit around and do nothing,” Cal grunted, hand smacking down on the table.

“You won’t be,” Maria said firmly. “Someone needs to be waiting if she shows up. So wait. If she shows up at either of your homes, you’ll be there.”

“You’re fuckin’ delusional if you thin-“

“Stop,” Maria interrupted softly. “Have either of you taken a moment to consider it might already be too late? It’s been three days… Do you really want to be the ones to find her if she’s…. I’m trying to keep you both separated from this, for your sakes.”

“I’m not fuckin’ listenin’ to this,” Joel grunted, pushing his chair from the table and stalking towards the front door. With his hand gripping the doorknob, he turned his head to the side, staring back at them from the corner of a tear-filled eye.

“She is out there somewhere, alive, puttin’ up a goddamn fight. And when I find her,” he spoke with his back to them, voice dangerously quiet. “I’m going to kill everyone who had anything to do with this. And you two won’t be able to stop me.”

Joel didn’t need to look at him to know that Cal agreed.

The curtains were always the first thing you saw. When your eyelids managed to crack open, to break through the dried blood that crusted over your eyelashes, you would always notice them first. Large, bundled drapes that reached the floor, covering the walls, concealing the windows and any potential natural light. It was so dark all of the time, and so time had lost meaning. You couldn’t tell how many hours, or days, had passed. All you knew was that the curtains, made from a dark fabric, with pictures of small birds sewn onto them, were the first thing you saw every time you opened your eyes.

Sparrows, the thought whispered through your mind. Little sparrows sewn into the curtains.

A small metal table was positioned in the corner opposite to where you laid on a thin mattress, arms tied to a pipe protruding from the wall. Sometimes your eyes flickered to it, trying to glean what was on it, but it was futile because of the distance. Candles were placed sporadically around the edges of the room, providing a vague yellow light to the space which allowed you see these things. But no natural light meant not knowing when the sun rose and fell., so you learned to rely on a different schedule. Twice a day he would bring a meal into the room, and you did your best to note the time passing, but even that provided little relief. Dehydration and pain had you dropping in and out of consciousness, and you rejoiced in the respite that sleep brought. Sleep brought quiet. Waking, however, brought with it a stark reminder of where you were.

An unpleasant stretching sensation resided in your arms. The muscles burned from hyperextension from constantly stretching behind you to the wall, your hands numb from a lack of blood flow due to how taught the rope around your wrist was pulled. But no matter how uncomfortable, you never turned your back to the door. That way he couldn’t enter the room without you seeing him immediately.

The throbbing in your foot, and the smell of metal was always what you noticed next. Blood stained the lower half of the mattress, and you did your best not to look down. But the smell was overwhelming, and you knew you had to see how much blood you’d lost. Your right foot was caked in dried blood, and the sight of one of your toes missing was enough to make your stomach curl every time, as waves of violent nausea rolled through you.

“That’s fine,” you whispered hoarsely, attempting to convince yourself. “Never used that one anyway, can live without it.”

Talking to yourself helped. Although your thoughts were often delirious and half-baked, hearing your own voice out loud brought a certain sense of calm.

And you’d formed a routine. Where every time you woke, you calmed your breathing, and forced yourself to decide how you were going to behave. How to survive another encounter with him. You’d chosen violence the first time, and you came to sorely regret it.

He’d been watching you that first day; waiting for you to stir. It had been dark, but you still saw him instantly. Cross-legged on the floor beside the mattress you laid on, dark beady eyes bearing down on your skin like weights. The itchy burn of rope against your wrists wasn’t as noticeable at first, for you were distracted by the thick wad of material in your mouth, placed there to keep you silent. When your brain had fully woken up, you’d glared at him in a wide-eyed panic, moaning urgently against the cloth between your teeth, tears brimming in your eyes. No, no, no, no.

“Shh,” Lincoln had murmured, brushing the hair out of your eyes. “It’s okay, shh.”

Tentatively, he reached down and tugged the cloth out of your mouth. You sucked in sharp panicked breaths, staring up at him as the feeling of white-hot terror spread through your veins, all the way from your neck down to your feet. It was him. All along, all the women, it had been him. This embarrassing, weak man, who’d had you fucking fooled. You’d thought him a creep, but not this. Never this.

“Breathe,” he’d whispered, stroking your cheek with his fingers. Heaving sighs tore out of your mouth, and you turned your head in his hold, brushing your nose along the palm of his hand. His eyes shone with appreciation at the gesture, and he smiled. “You’re here with me now. It’s just you and me.”

Holding his gaze for a split second longer, you sank your teeth into the flesh of his hand. He shouted in pain, attempted to pull back, but you bit him harder, deeper. The taste of metal filled hit your tongue, but you didn’t let go until his other hand struck you across the face, knocking you back.

He'd hit your left side, and the all-too-familiar buzzing soared through your ear, exacerbating the pounding in your skull. “You cunt,” he spat, rising to his feet. He glared down at you, cradling his wounded hand against his chest.

And then his foot was slamming into your ribcage. “You stupid,” kick “fucking” kick “cunt” kick. The breath left your body, and you curled in on yourself on the thin mattress, wheezing, until he gave up.

“You won’t do that again,” his reedy voice called out from behind you. “Do you understand?”

Your back was to him, eyes clamped shut as you tried desperately to regulate your breathing. A stabbing pain burned in your right side, flaring every time your chest expanded with a breath. His hand came down on your shoulder, flattening you on the mattress.

“Speak,” he had snarled. “You will answer me when I talk to you, SPEAK.”

Your bloody lips stayed sealed in defiance, glaring up at him. Slowly, the corners of his mouth began to turn upward, lips stretching open to reveal a faded set of crooked teeth until he was grinning down at you. “Okay,” he nodded, reaching into his pocket and walking to the end of the mattress. “You want to see what happens when you disobey me in my house? I’ll show you what happens.”

It had been quick.

Flashes of it were burnt into your memory, but the feeling of the moment evaded you when you thought back on it. Him kneeling on your shins, saying “Do as I say, or I’ll clip your wings, little bird.” Pliers in his hand. The feeling of the cold metal on your foot. The smell of iron. A pinkie toe on the floor, by the mattress, in a crimson puddle.

Your hoarse, tormented wails had filled the room so suddenly that Lincoln was cursing while he stuffed the rag back between your lips, muttering something about people hearing you.

He had loomed over you, torso pressed against yours, gritting his teeth and laughing. Put his hands around your neck and whispered of the stories he’d heard about you, that he’d wondered about you since the day Tommy introduced him to you. “I think that was the moment I decided,” he said. “The moment I knew you were going to be mine – it was the very first time I saw you.”

“I wanted to know what he saw in you,” he’d jeered, breath hot against your neck. His hand gripped your throat, squeezing your windpipe intermittently, only ever letting up when your eyes started to roll back and the pressure inside your skull from a lack of oxygen started to become unbearable, only to increase the pressure again once you’d had a few seconds to breathe. “I’d always thought you must be a good lay, if you’ve got big bad Joel Miller whipped like a dog. Realised pretty damn quick I’d have to find out for myself.” Your arms fought tirelessly against the ropes that bound you to the wall, limbs thrashing beneath him, trying to inflict any sort of pain on him.

You frantically mouthed the word no around the rag, lungs heaving in search of oxygen. The last thing you saw before you passed out was his haunting grin.

And you were smarter after that.

Lincoln was hard to read. When he came to the room next, he acted as though the altercation had never happened. And so you followed suit. You listened when he spoke, and answered accordingly. You ate the food he slid across the floor to you. You held in a disgusted reaction when he gestured to the candles around the room one time, and said, “Romantic isn’t it? Candlelit dinner for two?”  

In the quiet moments, your mind would float away, and you’d allow yourself brief moments of respite, imagining that you were somewhere, anywhere, else. In your dreams, you were with Joel. Safe in his home, in his bed, playing scrabble with Ellie on his porch while he kept score. You tried to remember the way his laugh sounded, or the way his hands felt on your skin. But everything was warped, the memories unclear. Your brain lacked clarity, and the pain distracted you. And Lincoln could tell where your thoughts went in those moments; you almost feared he could read your mind. As if your brain was splayed open before him, and he was pecking at it in curiosity.

“No one will find you,” he’d say softly. Never nastily, but in a tone that was matter of fact. “They aren’t coming for you. It’s just you and me now, sweet girl.”

You would blink away the tears in your eyes and try not to let him see how afraid you were that he was right. Your memories with Joel felt so hazy, and the last time you’d seen him he had been devastated. He feared what you’d almost done to Ellie, feared how out of his control it had been. Maybe it’s for the best, the thought raced through your brain. Maybe they’ll be happier without you.

Those thoughts were the hardest to shake. And they cut deeper than any injury Lincoln could ever inflict.

One night, when it felt like almost a week had passed, Lincoln entered the room holding two plates.

“Dinner time,” his thin voiced called, and a chill ran down your spine. Slowly, you pushed yourself into a seated position, cringing as pain shot through your side.

He placed a plate beside the mattress before tenderly undoing the rope around your left wrist.

“Eat up,” he murmured, taking a few steps back before settling onto the ground and picking up his fork.

You gazed down at the raw red marks around your wrist, basking in your favourite moment of the day – just a few sweet minutes of ‘freedom’. With an aching chest, you saw what rested on the plate. A kind of dark meat, and a small serving of parsnips.

Oh, Joel.

Sucking your lips into you mouth, you willed the tears in your eyes to dry up, desperate not to let him see any sign of weakness.

Out of the corner of your eye you noticed Lincoln reaching out across the space between you, and then he placed his thumb and forefinger over the big toe on your right foot, squeezing it once in a silent threat. Your throat tightened, and you resisted the urge to pull away. Speak.

“Why are you doing this?” you whispered hoarsely, staring at the food.

“It’s dinner time, when else would I feed you?” he attempted to joke, hand leaving your foot to pick his fork up again. When you didn’t respond the smile slipped off his face. “You’re in a bad mood today,” he decided. “I suppose I understand.”

He watched you like a hawk, eyes raking over your features, your bloodstained clothes, the way you gazed despondently at the plate before you. “Surely you can appreciate though… I mean, it’s just… delightful, don’t you see? To see someone be brought down to their basest human form. No sunlight, minimal human interaction. You rely on me for water, for food, for company. I am all you have anymore, and it is simply… delicious.”

“You’re a fucking sadist,” you shuddered involuntarily, his words making goosebumps break out across your skin. 

“I think so,” Lincoln nodded contemplatively. “It’s not inherently sexual though, I’ll have you know.” You stared, and he let out a low chuckle, hands raising defensively. “Not entirely, at least.”

“You’ll get caught,” you sneered, ignoring the way a cut on your upper lip reopened when your mouth pulled open to reveal your teeth. “You’ll slip up and someone will notice. Joel will notice.”

“Only time will tell,” he mused around a mouthful of food. “Never been caught before though, have I? Not with Milena, or any of the others before you. Not even with my wife; although it was certainly easier to get away with it in those days. The world had gone to shit – everyone was going missing; assumed to be dead or infected. It was so easy. Our girls never had a clue. They trusted me, you see? My beautiful little birds. Believed me when I told them she was lost, that she must’ve been infected. I think that’s what I adore the most – the trust. It was hard to come by here, in Jackson. People were so wary, I had to build up their confidence in me. Really ease into things, you know? But some of these women, they just saw what they wanted to see. A few kind smiles, some silly jokes, and they were mine.” Lincoln sighed wistfully, gazing absentmindedly at the curtains. “Do you like them?” he changed the subject suddenly. “They’re sparrows. Sewed them on myself.” Good God, he was still so fucking chatty.

Nausea twisted in your abdomen. Acidic bile burned in the back of your throat, threatening to bring up the pathetic contents of your stomach. “And your daughters?” you hesitated, wary of angering him. “I… I remember you saying they died.”

He paused with his fork halfway to his mouth, and you noticed one of his eyebrows twitch at the mention of his late children. “I let them go quickly,” he exhaled with a shrug. “Painlessly. It didn’t make sense to make them endure this world anymore. It was a mercy, if anything.”

“Fresh out of mercy then?” you asked bitterly. “If you’re so kind, and so fucking merciful, then why the are you dragging this out? Why won’t you just fucking end it?”

Fork dropping onto his plate with a loud clang, Lincoln murmured your name kindly. “Please understand,” he said. “I don’t know when I’ll get the chance again. You might be my last for a few months… so I’m trying to savour every minute I have with you.”

You stared at him, blinking slowly as you absorbed his words. How long could you possibly survive down here in these conditions? But the truth was, you knew the answer to that. You knew because you’d survived for years out in the open, with less food and less water than this. Here you had shelter, warmth, food, and water. He could keep you alive for as long as he wanted you.

Realising it had been some time since you responded to him you offered a meek smile and said, “Tell me more about the sparrows.”

Lincoln looked at you curiously. Trying not to appear uncertain, you reached forward and scooped some food from the plate with your free hand and began to eat. The action alone reminded you of Cal. Of dark nights, huddled together in dusty broken-down buildings, eating whatever food you’d been able to find out of the palms of your hands. You sniffled pathetically and tried not to think about him again.

“Good girl,” he murmured almost inaudibly, and you fought off a shiver. Swallowing made your chest ache. Based on the swelling around the middle of your torso, you assumed at least one of your ribs was broken. Even inhaling brought a sharp pain to your right side, but swallowing? That was a whole other world of pain.

Lincoln spoke about the birds, told you how they symbolised joy and simplicity, and your eyes flitted around the room, taking in as much as you could in the dim yellow light. And then suddenly, he was turning his head fully to stare at the curtains. His back was almost entirely to you, and your heart stuttered painfully at the opportunity that had presented itself. From this angle, you were sure he wouldn’t be able to see you in his peripheral vision. Was this on purpose? Was it a test? Heart pounding, you worked silently to push the remaining food off your ceramic plate and onto the floor. Eyes focused on him, you waited for him to turn back, to check in on you, to do anything – but he didn’t.

“You know in the bible,” he said thoughtfully. “Sparrows represented God’s love and care for his creations.”

You hummed in response, gripping the plate in your hand and edging forward. Sweat tickled your forward, made your skin itch. You wanted to wipe away the fresh blood that had oozed from your lip onto your chin, but you refrained. No sudden movements. He was so close now, and this chance would not be wasted on you.

Do not be afraid, you thought.

Blood rushed in your ears as you propelled yourself forward, smashing the plate down upon the crown of his skull.

Lincoln pitched forward, his face knocking against the cold ground with a sickening thwack. He howled a ragged, guttural noise of pain, but his movements were sluggish, his reaction time too slow. A fiery pain roared in your side from the movement and you whimpered, dropping the jagged shard of the plate that remained in your hand. Gripping his ankle, you cried out at the strength required to tug his body toward you. He was writhing on the ground, trying to fight against the fog in his brain no doubt, but you pulled him still, until he was perfectly close.

He mumbled your name, and you brought your fist down over his nose, effectively shutting him up.

“Stop fucking saying my name,” you growled, angrily swiping perspiration off your upper lip. This was it. If this didn’t work out, if he regained the upper hand, you’d be dead, no questions asked. You’d started this, and now would certainly be your only chance to finish it. God, your ribs were on fire. You hastily dragged a fragment of the plate in a sawing movement across the rope keeping your other wrist tied, and when it broke away, you heaved a painful sigh of relief.

Planting your knees on either side of his body, you straddled his chest, trapping his arms to his torso. You patted down his body, searching his pockets until you found what you were looking for. The pliers were cold and heavy in your hand. Lincoln blinked lazily, gazing past your shoulder at the roof.

You reached down and gripped the sides of his head. “Look at me,” you seethed, before slamming his head back into the ground. He groaned loudly, but his eyes focused on your face. Blood poured from his nose, spilling into his open mouth and filling the gaps between tooth and gum.

“You won’t kill me,” he garbled out around the crimson liquid. “My little bird… I know you wouldn’t kill me.”

“Stop talking,” you moved to be beside his body and pressed your knee onto his left arm.

“You won’t,” he was speaking incessantly now, rambling. “I know you, you’re good. You’re so good, you sweet girl. You wouldn’t kill, and that’s why I like you. I could see it in you. You’re too good for this world, I’m trying to help you, don’t you see?”

“Shut up,” you snarled, pushing the pliers down until they were positioned around his pinkie finger. “You think you fucking know me? You have no idea of the things I’ve done.”

His eyes blinked lazily, trying listlessly to focus. His free hand reached sluggishly towards your face, and you batted it down roughly. Gripping the pliers in both hands, you pressed down. The sound of his screams filled the room as his pinkie finger rolled across the floor.

“You want me to come into my home,” you sneered. “Take me, hide me away, and then kill me?” Positioning the tool over his ring finger, you cut him slowly, revelling in the pained sounds leaving his body, the way his blood spilled onto your hands as you worked. “Oh, Lincoln. You’ll have to try harder than this.”

Again and again, you worked with a gruellingly slow pace, removing all five digits. You didn’t notice that his free hand was gripping your arm so tightly that his nails had drawn blood. Bile rose in your throat, but you swallowed it down. Do not be afraid.

“Please,” he was sobbing, his mouth wide open like a sore on his face, jagged teeth exposed through thin bloody lips.

And yet as he begged, you couldn’t bring yourself to feel remorse, because through the tears, and the snot, and the blood, it wasn’t just Lincoln that you saw. It was that boy, from a decade ago. That boy that climbed on top of you and laughed. Who enjoyed your fear. Who held you down that night, and every night after, plaguing you in your sleep for years. The boy you couldn’t fight. The boy you couldn’t kill. You wouldn’t let it happen again. Never again.

A memory flitted through your mind so quickly it almost didn’t register. But his voice was clear in your head. Joel, and the words you’d shared in front of the fireplace at your home so many weeks beforehand.

“I want to be strong, Joel.”

“You are strong.”

You refocused on Lincoln’s face.

“You want to be in control?” you sputtered, vaguely aware of how deranged your shrill voice sounded. “You want women to be quiet little toys for you to play with in this sick game you’ve created? I’m a fucking person! I’m real!” your voice cracked. “You want to kill me, Lincoln? Let’s see you do it without your fucking fingers.” You realised then that you were crying. Soundless tears streaked down your cheeks, leaving clear trails in the dirt and blood that stained your face.  

He looked on the verge of passing out, and you tore his hand off your arm, stumbling away from his body. You stepped awkwardly on your right foot and yelped in pain, grimacing at the bloody footprint that followed behind you when you walked. Wrapping an arm around your torso, against your ribs, you struggled to breathe. Running on pure adrenaline, your eyes drifted toward the table in the corner. A pocketknife and a lighter laid serenely on the top of it, and you stumbled toward it slowly.  

But a heavy blow landed on the back of your knee, stopping you in your tracks. Your arms flailed as you fell forward, and when you hit the ground, the table came toppling down with you.

“S-stop,” Lincoln was speaking, his speech slurred and disjointed. His bloodied hands clawed at your legs, pulling your body towards him while you thrashed against his hold. Your leg kicked backward desperately and connected with his face, and you screamed at the throbbing pain that shot through your foot.

Neither of you noticed how the table had knocked over multiple candles, or the way fire blazed along the bottom of the curtains. Little sparrows, turning to ash as flames snaked their way up the drapes, slowly engulfing the walls of the room in vibrant red.

You fumbled for the pocketknife on the floor, rolling onto your back just as his weight landed on top of you. His heavy breaths hit your face, blood dripping from his nose and splashing onto your skin.

“Little bird,” he whimpered brokenly. “Why would you ruin this?”

The temperature in the room had risen exponentially, and the pair of you were so close to the wall that it was impossible to ignore now. Wild flames licked at the bare skin of your arm, but you paid the burn no mind, pushing against his face, his neck, trying to get as much distance between you as possible.

“This isn’t how it was supposed to be,” he howled, landing a heavy blow across your face. You coughed roughly, blood spitting up from your mouth onto your chin.

You gave up on pushing him back, instead using your hands to fumble with the knife. Lincoln’s good hand gripped your throat, his remaining fingers pressing down on your windpipe. Blood roared in your ears, and you were sweating, and god it was so hot. The air thickened with smoke, making it harder to breathe than it already was. Your hands were so slick with blood that it was difficult to unhook the small blade, but after a few moments you did it. Gasping for air as he bore his entire weight against your neck, you plunged the knife into his side.

A choked sound of surprise fell from his mouth, and then air was rushing into your lungs, and you were coughing harshly, watching as his body collapsed to the side of you.

He was still alive when you crawled on top of him, eyes bulging as he gripped the handle of the blade lodged in his side. You slammed your fist against his broken nose, and both of you cried out in pain. By this point, the fire was roaring through the room, the four walls covered in a beautiful mix of orange and red flames. The heat was sweltering, and so so close that sweat dripped from your nose and chin.

A deafening bang reverberated through the room and you covered your face instinctively. Shattered glass from the windows rained through the air and covered the ground, and moonlight streamed into the room.

Distantly, you thought you could hear voices, or the sound of a door opening, but you ignored it. Impossible. Your fingers wrapped around Lincoln’s spindly neck, and you positioned your thumbs over his windpipe, before pressing downward with all of the strength in your body. Exhaustion weighed heavily on you, but you pushed through it, gathering blood and spit in your mouth and releasing it in a spray onto his face. He flinched back at the sensation, and you grinned messily.

You imagined briefly what you must look like; covered in a mix of blood and dirt, hair matted to your head, straddling this man, and grinning down at him.

“Are you afraid?” you whispered.

You could see the light slowly fading from his eyes, and you pressed harder, arms burning with the effort. A burning sensation exploded in your left thigh, but you ignored it, digging your elbows into his chest for leverage and pushing. In the second you realised it was about to be over, there were hands on you. Gripping you, wrapping around your waist, wrenching you away from him.

The foreign hands were pulling you back, tugging you towards the door, but your eyes were trained on Lincoln, as he gasped for air on the floor, alive. You could hear shouting, male voices yelling so closely, but the words were indecipherable. And then suddenly, you were enveloped by cold, winter air. You were outside.

Hyperventilating, you dropped to your knees on the ground, burying your red hands in the wet grass, and wailed. Thick tears blurred your vision and rolled down your face in hot rivulets.

The relief was short lived though, as those hands returned to your body. Gliding over your back, squeezing your shoulders, touching your face. Your stomach rolled violently.

“Don’t touch me,” you begged, your voice an unfamiliar shriek as it ripped from somewhere deep inside your body. “Get your fucking hands off me, don’t fucking touch me, don-“

“Darlin’, it’s me, it’s me,” you could hear, but you just fought harder, beating against the solid wall of brick in front of you, pounding your fists against his chest.

“I’ll fucking,” you gasped for air, eyes clamped tightly shut. “I’ll fucking kill you, get away from me.”

But familiar hands were gripping your face, holding you tightly, forcing you to look, and when you did, it’s like your body went limp. All the fight in you disappeared.

You mumbled his name, and he nodded furiously, those brown eyes you loved gazing into yours, panic and concern evident in the harsh lines across his forehead, in that deep frown you knew so well.

“It’s me, baby, I’ve got you,” his voice was like a song in your ears, and you closed your eyes and let him hold you, listening to the desperate apologies he whispered into your ear. “You’re safe, I’m so sorry, I’m so fuckin’ sorry. I’ve got you now, it’s over, it’s over.”

part seven

tag list <3

@huffle-punk @n7cje @ghostofjoharvelle @nrmnie @sarahhxx03 @casa-boiardi @leeeesahhh @missgurrl

[ellieluvr420]

Eye for an Eye Pt.6

MASTERLIST (and information about Palestine) Please read!

SYNOPSIS: Your body yearned for the touch of your girlfriend, the warm embrace that calmed your mind but you couldn't give in, the anger you harboured for her at disappearing with her group for three months without any warning, explanation or even a mention of when she would be back stopped you in your tracks any time you got close to giving in. You loved Abby so much but looking at her made you sick, you couldn't push the feelings down no matter how much you craved for things to go back to what they once were. You hadn't planned this but the anguish in those green eyes mirrored yours and sucked you in before you could think twice about the repercussions of your actions. You made your bed when you made the deal with the auburn-haired stranger, eventually you'd have to lie in it.

MDNI smut!!!!

I want to quickly stress that this is a darker fic and there will be a lot of darker, possibly triggering themes to do with mental health throughout so take that as a warning. I likely won't do warnings for each part because part of this fic for me is that you don't know what's going to happen until you read it so please do not read if you find graphic descriptions of mental illness and topics surrounding that triggering (this includes suicide, be warned). But if you do read, thank you so much, this story is really important to me and I appreciate any interaction whatsoever!

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧    

The only sound you could hear on your walk back to the stadium from the theatre was your heartbeat thumping in your ears, your entire body was throbbing and tingling, you had just told Ellie everything, the sense of doom slowly caging you in like dark clouds do to signal a storm is on its way. You should be grateful really, no screams and moans of infected, no humvees coming to search for the missing traitor, but you’d take anything over this mind-bending silence. There’s nothing to ground you, nothing to keep you in reality. You try and keep yourself calm but you’re on your own, there was no one keeping you in check, no one to remind that you exist and that you’re alive, just you and the Seattle roads that rain was bouncing off the surface of. 

When did it start to rain? 

You hadn’t noticed the torrential onslaught, soaking you to the bone, sending painful chills through your body, you hadn’t noticed the way it dropped off your eyelashes and ran down your cheeks, maybe that same path had been numbed from all the tears you had shed. 

I don’t remember turning down here. Why did I turn down here? Fuck. 

Alarm bells sounded in your mind as you backtracked to the main road, you just needed to make it to the stadium, you tried to breathe, shaky inhales and exhales racking your body, inflating and deflating your chest. Your thoughts swam and collided together, shrieking and crying, you just needed to get back to the stadium. 

Five things I can see 

Rain, an overturned car, a tree, my hands, the stadium. Okay not long now. 

Four things I can hear 

My heartbeat, my breathing, the rain, a runner crying. Oh that’s... comforting. 

Three things I can touch 

My jeans, my hair, the ground. I don’t remember falling over, fuck my knee hurts. Focus. 

Two things I can smell 

Blood, and the rain. I think I’ve said the rain too much. 

One thing I can taste 

Abby’s lips. Fuck, when the fuck did I get back here? I’m kissing her. 

Your eyes snapped open as you jumped away from Abby’s sleeping form, you had pecked her but you had no idea how long you’ve been here, you’re in pyjamas and there’s no blood on you so you must’ve showered but the last thing you remember is smelling the rain mixing with the moss and grass that had overtaken the city and now you were laying in Abby’s bed, kissing her sweet lips that had tormented you with their silence for all too long. You forced yourself back into the bed and pressed your hands over your lips to muffle the sobs that you could no longer control. You could barely breathe, panic taking you in its grasp and caressing your skin, setting it on fire as you tried desperately not to wake your sleeping girlfriend. 

You had no idea how long you’ve cried but when you finally work up the courage to spare a glance over your shoulder, Abby is sleeping peacefully beside you, you brush a stray hair from her face and will yourself to go to sleep, to forget for just awhile the nightmare that encompasses you in consciousness. 

The exhaustion took over and eventually you succumbed to a restless sleep, only then did Abby crack her eyes open and peer over at you with a confused look. She had stirred as you entered the room but she was still too tired to move, she felt your lips press to hers and as soon as they were there, they were gone as you ripped yourself away, gasping and sobbing until you slept. She had woken up once before and noted your absence from the room but that had to have been hours ago so hearing you come back only confused her more, she was going to ask but the way you had reacted to kissing her stopped her dead in her tracks and now she lay awake contemplating whether she should ask or if she’d just end up pushing you further away. 

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧    

Abby sat with Manny in the canteen, she had left you asleep in the room in need of some space to clear her head, she had been so in her head recently with the deaths of her friends that she was starting to wonder if she had imagined you going back to normal around her, that she had dreamt it up to provide some solace but that didn’t feel right. She needed reassurance and she felt wrong asking for it from you. 

“Manny, does she seem okay to you?” 

“Hm? Oh, well you two seem fine, you know she isn’t really talking to the group again yet but from what I’ve seen you look the gross lovebirds you were before. Why do you ask?” 

“I don’t know, it’s just been a lot and I think I said something the other day when she was comforting me about... you know.” Neither of them could bare to say their late friends' names. “I’m scared she’s gonna pull away from me again.” Manny opened his mouth to reply but a shadow looming over the table stopping him. 

“Hey Melon, you okay?” Manny greeted her with a smile that she was yet to return. There were bags under her eyes and a permanent frown etched into her features. Her eyes were glassy and bloodshot and only made Abby’s nerves spike. 

“I need you guys to follow me.” She doesn’t wait, she just starts walking, leaving Abby and Manny to share dumbfounded looks as they followed in silence. “I’m not supposed to be showing you this so you cannot tell anyone.” Her voice was foreboding as she led them down to the morgue, rows upon rows of body bags, the stench was suffocating as they all coughed into their arms. 

“Why are we down here Mel?” Abby said still covering her mouth and nose with her sleeve. 

“I’m really sorry guys.” She unzipped the bag to show them Nora’s mangled corpse, it was hard to even tell it was a person at first, but the look in Mel’s eyes left no room for denial. 

“Oh my god.” Manny breathed as he gagged. 

Abby could barely feel her feet on the ground, her vision blurred and her ears rang, she couldn’t get enough air into her lungs as the world span and she stumbled out of the room that felt like it was collapsing in on her. She just kept walking and walking until she had no idea what quiet corridor she had stumbled into and collapsed against the wall, the tears fell and fell, waves cascading from her eyes, swelling her lips and making it hard to breathe, she felt sick as she clutched onto her stomach and tried to force her brain to calm before she had a full blown panic attack. She tried to focus on anything other than Nora’s lifeless body, her patrol schedules, the routes, you, your strange behaviour last night... Where had you gone last night? Something twisted in her gut and she was moving quicker and quicker towards Rocky’s office. She needed to see the patrol assignments. 

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧  

“Hey babe!” Your voice called throughout Abby’s room as you heard the door open and close. She watched as you emerged from the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around you, slinking over to her with a dark look in your eyes. “You weren’t here when I woke up, was gonna come look for you in a second.” Abby went to speak but she was frozen as you looped your arms around her neck and pulled her into an earth-shattering kiss. All her focus went to your lips caressing hers, the feel of your tongue lapping at hers, the way your body pressed itself into every ounce of space between you until there was none left. Her arms hooked round your waist as she sighed into the kiss, completely transfixed by you. 

Her brows furrowed as one of your hands left its place around her neck and shuffled between your bodies but her eyes snapped open at the sound of your towel dropping, leaving you completely bare in front of her hungry eyes that devoured you more with every second.  

“Strip.” Your voice was sultry, dark, it only drew her in further as she complied with your command, each step she took closer to you as she tried to rid herself of her clothing, you took a step back with a giggle. She frowned and rushed more, almost tripping over as she kicked her cargos off. She lunged at you and you let her sweep you off your feet, wrapping your legs round her waist and squeezing. She caught your lips in a fiery kiss once again, a hand coming to rest on the back of your head as she walked you down the steps of her room towards her bed, she felt your fingers snake around her neck and squeeze enough to make blood rush in her head, eliciting a guttural groan from deep inside her. 

It was a mess of breathy moans into each other’s lips, the clashing of teeth and tongue, the grabbing and clawing, the marking of soft skin, it was all the pent-up emotions releasing and floating into the space around you. For Abby, this was comfort, this was a reconciliation, one that she desperately needed. For you, it was a distraction, from Ellie, from all that you had done, for you, it was a goodbye.  

She lowered you down onto her bed, immediately climbing on top of you and pressing a thigh to your cunt as you lifted yours that was sandwiched between her thighs to press against her core. A symphony of gasps and groans filled the room as you each felt the friction igniting sparks within you. Abby bit down on your bottom lip as you gripped her hair at her scalp and yanked.  

“Fuck I needed this so bad, I love you babe, I’ve missed you.” Abby’s voice was a distant echo in the furthest corner of your brain as you chased your high, each grinding in motion with each other as your body’s tangled closer and closer together. You caught her lips in a fiery kiss so you didn’t have to speak, didn’t have to tell her you loved her back, that lie might break your subconscious altogether. You moaned into her mouth letting her muffle your sounds as you both inched towards your release. 

Your bodies tensed and spasmed as all your nerves felt like they were on fire and with a couple harsh thrusts of your clit against her toned thigh, the muscles rippling under the skin, you came undone, arching your back and clawing at hers as a string of profanities fell from your lips. Abby followed almost immediately after with a whimper before her body relaxed and she collapsed all of her weight on you. 

It had been rushed and passionate but all it did was confirm the loss of your feelings for her. Her fingers squeezing at your waist felt like knives, her breath on your chest felt ice cold and her weight on your body could have been a boulder crushing and suffocating you. All of the things you had loved about sex with her, loved about after sex with her, only made you hate her more. 

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧    

The day was quiet, you and Abby lounging together as Abby reads while you listen to endless records, music had always grounded you, given you something to focus on. 

“What are you reading?” You pressed. It was getting easier to act normal around her, it was easier to pretend when you knew it would be over soon. Good memories, that’s all you wanted to think about until you both laid to rest. 

“Medea, it’s a Greek tragedy. This wife goes kinda crazy because her husband ditched her for a younger woman. It’s a lot but it’s really good.” 

“You’re such a nerd.” She gasps and clutches her chest in feigned hurt. “Hey I never said it was a bad thing.” You both laughed and though there was a sadness in her eyes though she seemed normal with you, everything was going to plan. 

The day went on like this until you both turned in for the night as you and Abby both had patrol the next morning. You fell asleep with Abby’s arm over your waist as her back was pressed to your front. 

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧    

You were in the theatre, standing on the stage, silence enveloping the large room until hands came to wrap around your waist and a sharp chin found its place on your shoulder as the figure swayed you while pressing soft kisses to your neck. 

“I missed you.” They hummed into your skin. 

“I missed you too Ellie.” She spun you to face her and the smile creeping across her features was ethereal, a smile you wished you could see more of. Her lips were soft and warm as you each lowered yourselves to the ground, her pressing her weight into you as you wrapped your legs around her waist. The kiss was slow and sweet, an exploration, until she pulled away and it was no longer Ellie gazing down at you lovingly, it was Abby glaring at you with a fire in your eyes. 

“How could you do this to me?” She growled and you were frozen, completely paralysed with fear. “I fucking loved you, you traitorous bitch, I’ll kill you for what you’ve done.” Her voice was now a scream as her hands wrapped around your throat and squeezed. She looked into your eyes and smiled as you felt her adjust her grip and within seconds you felt your neck shatter to pieces as she broke it like she would a twig, your body went numb and your surroundings faded to nothing. 

“Babe, wake up! You’re having a nightmare.” You could hear screaming, distant and quiet as hands shook you until your eyes flew open. “Hey it wasn’t real, it was a dream, you’re okay, you’re safe.” Abby’s calm voice sounded above you as you felt her arms wrap you in their grip, tears beginning to fall as what you had dreamt of dawned on you. 

I just need this feeling to end. 

“What happened babe?” Her sweet voice tickled your forehead where her lips rested. 

“I can’t even remember, fuck, thanks for waking me up.” The lie slipped out so easily, it was getting too easy to lie. You sniffled and cuddled into her desperately trying to push the dream out of your mind and make your lie the truth.  

a/n: Hi sorry for the hiatus but I am back and friends never pt23 is on its way also, I kinda hate this chapter and I'm sorry it's shorter but it's a bit of a filler chapter to move the story along so I apologise, hope you enjoyed anyway and see you in the next one!

tags: @emiliabby @liasxeatt @kawaiibreadbouquet-blog @tphmnv @a-little-bit-of-everybody @chrry1ovr @bready101 @euphternal @elliestwofingers @angelsrotation @drippyop

[luckstergal]

Yandere Elliott Mod is funny as hell (to me)

Disclaimer: None of this is meant to be taken seriously, this is me rambling into the void and to my friends.

I cannot believe I'm reviewing a mod, lol. Is it a review? I don't know anymore, just giving my take on it.

It's been like 2 weeks since I gave the Yandere Elliott mod a try and honestly I find it more unintentionally hilarious than off-putting in most places.

I felt that some of the moments could be interpreted as genuinely wholesome and sweet if you isolated them (but that's just how context works in a nutshell I suppose. Look, I genuinely thought the insomnia scene and the post-moonlight-jellies scene with adorable, alright?).

The fact that I have to go out of my way to play very different than I ever would have certainly modifies my overall perspective. If I played normally, the only really unsettling thing would be his unhinged letters. Well, one in particular at least. Most of the letters were campy and funny, knowing how melodramatic this character is naturally. Only 1 letter made me and 2 other people I showed it to go "Oh GOD". Everything else? Unintentionally hilarious, or wholesome if you take the obsession letters out. His stalker-schedule was funny as hell. What do I mean by that? How is the "stalker schedule" funny? The mod alters his schedule after 1 heart, so he'll periodically go spy on you on the farm. This was scary only twice for me because I didn't expect it, and there was a long gap between the first time and the second time. Once summer hit, however, it got funny. He was showing up every single day at 6:30 on the dot, except for Friday and Sunday. He was so punctual that I'd look at the clock, see he's about to show up, and prepare myself for my daily convo with him/gift giving if it's Monday and Tuesday. Man was so consistent it was hilarious.

Even better: when he's standing there for so long, his pathfinding kinda... glitches? He'll act like there's something in front of him preventing his movement (like when a player character standing in an NPC's pathing) and suddenly just... book it across the map into the void. Practically died laughing (though I did freak out the first time it happened because I thought "WAIT THIS MOD LETS HIM CHASE YOU?" only for him to run passed and into nothingness)

It actually got a bit lonely in autumn when he stopped showing up and opted to camp outside the mines instead all day. (Elli, sweetie, Ignatius is not going there most of the time because autumn 1 is a busy season for him, come back!) The fact that I have to fully romance all the other bachelors in order to activate one of the legitimately most unhinged aspects of the mod is what throws me off. I know they're fictional characters, but I've always felt icky at multi-dating personally. Just not for me. I pick one and I stick with my decision. Reading the text in the content file is one thing, but I wanted to see the event play out for myself.

After the event, it got hilarious again completely on accident.

Cue Elli not letting Ignatius leave the farm because of his jealousy. It was winter when this happened. The Obsession Cage-Loop event is designed to where Pierre will send you 50 of a random seed packet every day to make up for the fact that you cannot leave.

Crops don't grow in winter.

The mod makes up for this fact by Pierre sending you ANCIENT FRUIT SEEDS. I had over 300 seeds by the time spring hit. Elli straight up SCAMMING Pierre during the Cage-Loop completely on accident. I'm just sitting here thinking "Dang, had I known this would have happened, I'd have activated this sooner AND kept Elli's heart-level low just to get more bang for my buck. Endless supply of Ancient Fruit Seeds just because you're jealous? Yes please!".

After the cage-loop is over, that's pretty much it. Elli apologizes, wants to do better so you feel safe around him, is willing to just be tormented by his jealousy; etc. and things just kinda go... normal??? After that. He still has his eye-brow raising marriage lines afterwards but after everything has passed, he's not too unsettling.

He's just a weirdo who doesn't know how to handle his love.

Other than ONE letter, and the fact that I had to go OUT OF MY WAY to deliberately activate the Cage-Loop event?

This mod vanilla as fuck, lol.

And no, I didn't do the divorce event. I have a history relating to such dark thoughts and even just reading the dialogue in the content file made me uncomfortable.

Overall 10/10 good way to have spent my week between my 2.0 vtuber model work.

--

It also do not help at all that what makes this mod hilarious in my head is that I play as an inhuman farmer who absolutely towers over Elli in every way. Ignatius is not threatened by this obsessive weirdo in the least bit.

[hauntedwizardmoment]

Ok now that you’ve brought it up the concept of Bluejay being Jaceporter’s live in boyfriend / awkward weird little house guest enmeshed in the jaceporter toxicity in Jace + the Jacesverse is so funny and I can’t stop thinking abt it. Finally please get blue in a situation where he’s not waiting on their hand and foot. And yet it’s still fucked in a different way <3

its SO GOOD bc it's like. what if j2 from cloneverse was right and there really WAS a secret good version of the torment nexus. but also there wasnt. also sorry this got long

so timeline vaguely is that first jaceporter get together, and so do lj3. and bluejay is the sole remainder. so he tries dating briefly but the spotlight is too much for any of his non-famous partners, and the famous people interested in him want the stage version of him, this bright-eyed ingenue who is so naive and innocent and virginal, and he hasnt been that for years, come on guys. its especially apparent with the older men who want him. porter is like a toned-down version of this atp because he's fronting as semi-normal to not scare j2 too much.

anyways. he's single, very pretty, and a little lonely bc jace and porter do a lot to keep him insulated from the world that is Too Harsh for their little songbird. theyre always over at his apartment to keep him company (preventing him from making friends outside of the jaceporter-approved circle), they run his social media and screen his calls and emails (restricting who he talks to), and they whisk him off on little adventures all the time (controlling where he is and who he's with).

and so j2's brain is Deeply cooked. he's so enmeshed. he thinks this is them taking care of him, and isnt that so kind of them when they dont have to? they should be spending this time with each other but instead theyre with him, always helping him and paying attention to him. (subtly, jace is like "see how we're here and ellie and j3 aren't? we're the only ones who actually care about you")

ofc the next recording cycle rolls around and so j2 is like. well you guys always come over to my place why dont i come over to yours this time. and he only means to stay for a couple of days. but he and jace have such a clear vision of what the next album should be and they end up spending an entire week in jace's home recording studio and crank out a double album's worth of demos to bring to ellie and j3. and theyre INCREDIBLY good is the thing. they'll go on to be remembered as some of the band's best songs.

and at the end of the week j2's like "well i dont want to overstay my welcome" and jace is like "oh youre not overstaying at all, why dont we celebrate? we did such a good job we deserve this" and j2 is like "okay!" and he spends another week at jace's house getting railed by him and porter w/ brief breaks to shower and eat something.

atp ellie comes looking because she hasnt heard from j2 in two weeks and comes to jace and porter's home like "where IS he. i know you have him" and jace is like "i'm not his keeper why are you asking me" (j2 is in the master bedroom w/ porter being handfed breakfast) and hands ellie the flashdrive full of demos and is like "here we worked on this, give it a listen and get back to me" and slams the door in her face before going back to j2 and porter.

and during this time. i think bluejay confides in them that sometimes he feels lonely. and theyre like "well why don't you move in? so youre not so alone in that apartment of yours." so he DOES. cue even more enmeshment and getting a front row seat to jace and porter's couples drama. plus finding out that porter's been screwing over the band in their contract and jace knows about it and is enabling him. but he's not telling ellie or j3 this because well. it's not like they cared about him enough to stop breathing into each others' mouths for five seconds.

[daily-coloring]

Best of 2023 - Songs

Strange things happens ... Artists I never liked before became one of my favorite this year. Kesha for example, not to mention Noel Gallagher. The CUNT. Playlist here.

01. Roisin Murphy - Can't Replicate - "It's odd I should run into you just as I'm getting ready to run away. I was waiting for something, that thing is you. But, baby, you found me, before I found you."

02. Depeche Mode - Never Let Me Go - "I'm waiting for your love, I know you'll want me. When your body's had enough your senses will see. There's only so much time we have to play with, to waste it is a crime. We have so much to give. When uncertainty parts you'll be ready to concede. It was plain from the start, you've been running from me and I have been patient, I have been so calm, bit my lips through the torment. Please fall into my arms."

03. Conan Gray - Never Ending Story

04. Mermaidens - Sister

05. Rebecca Black - Performer - "Every time I try to be more vulnerable it's like I hit a wall. Can't go any further. I don't wish this on anyone it's gone on way too long patterns unbreakable. I'm a performer, got myself cornered, put on my armor, just like my mother and father. Multiple versions of the same person, all of them hurting. Don't think the performance is working."

06. Maneskin - Honey (Are You Coming)

07. Everything But The Girl - Karaoke - "That night down at the karaoke I was in the groove. Someone tried some Dylan but the place remained unmoved. A guy then goofed through Elvis. Why not, I thought, why not? If you want it, you can own it just aim, then take a shot."

08. Anna B Savage - Pavlov's Dog

09. Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Broken Toy

10. Kesha - Only Love Can Save Us Now

11. Daughter - Party - "I refuse to believe that there's a problem, you see. I could stop if I want, I just don't want to yet. I creep the volume up, I've gotta drown myself out. She's a rattlesnake, some stereo mind game. I play with myself. Yeah, she's on repeat, throwing up memories, that haven't deleted."

12. Rebecca Black - Crumbs

13. JMSN - Soft Spot

14. The Blessed Madonna featuring Jacob Lusk - Mercy

15. When Saints Go Machine - Gone

16. Tsatsamis - Everybody Wants a Piece of You

17. Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Everything Is Sweet - "Where everything is sweet and lovely and nothing bad ever happens, maybe, then, you would love me and my smile wouldn't hide the sadness. Take me to a place enchanted, take me to a heavenly fortress, where everything is sweet and lovely. Tell me that you dream about us."

18. Depeche Mode - Don't Say You Love Me

19. Orbital featuring Anna B Savage - Home

20. Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Reflections

21. Roisin Murphy - Eureka

22. HMLTD - Days

23. Noel Gallaghers's High Flying Birds - Pretty Boy

24. Joyce Muniz - Arrivederci Bella

25. Ai Weiwei + O Future + Aliah Rosenthal - Hum Bom!

26. Anna B Savage - The Ghost

27. Future Utopia featuring Kae Tempest - We Were We Still Are

28. Everything But The Girl - When You Mess Up

29. Roisin Murphy - You Knew - "Don't come the innocent boy, admit that you've got your motives. You knew exactly what motivates me I believe the record will show this and I think you've always known I have feelings for you that burn . (You knew) but you just won't go there with me. (You knew) and take some sort of responsibility."

30. Allie X - Black Eye

31. DJ Shadow - You Played Me

32. Depeche Mode - Ghost Again

33. Daughter - Be On Your Way

34. Clark - Town Crank

35. Blaue Blume - Crush

36. Air Jackson + ACI TONA - When We Were Younger

37. Interplanetary Criminal + Porij - Don't Hurt Me

38. Mermaidens - Push It

39. Shamir - Obsession

40. Tove Lo - Borderline

41. Tzusing - Balkanize

42. Kesha - Eat The Acid

43. Spoort - Stained Glass Windows

44. Noel Gallaghers's High Flying Birds - Council Skies

45. Orbital featuring Coppe - Moon Princess

46. Not Waving - Running Back To You

47. Joy Wellboy - Flush Me

48. Jake Shears - Radio Eyes

49. DJ Icey - Hold On To Me

50. Caterina Barbieri - Math of You

51. Anna B Savage - Touch Me -"Touch me, Please. Pull my hair, caress my cheek. One more graze that lingers. My mouth would part to welcome those fingers."

52. Glasser - Vine

53. Nina Kravitz - Tarde

54. Rebecca Black - Stick to my Stomach

55. Restive Plaggona - Non Chi No Ni

56. Young Fathers - Drum

57. Sophie Ellis-Bextor - Reflections

58. Sevdaliza - Who Are You Running From

59. Jodi Harsh - Hectic

60. Deus - Faux Bamboo - "Cause the house we live in it took years of building. Now the thunder's shaking, before the lightning I couldn't see it. Don't mistake it cause I'm ready for anything you better know. You're the one who breaks it. I'm not walking alone now."

[sand-worms]

Hi how about bom, gnocchi, agnolotti, ris and Maggio 🥰 a completely random combo of characters

Why don’t you just send me in an ask to do every single character in vento aureo oh my fucking lord

Bombolone 💕

- She’s SOOOOO fucking pink she’s so pink…

- I think she has a nice balance of her emotionality and her patience being both strengths and weaknesses for her

- She’s honestly fairly simple and it doesn’t take much to make her happy. I love that for her

- Her stand is such a pain in the ass to draw but I think it’s really pretty shakdbcj

- ummm she’s bisexual and she keeps winning!

Gnocchi

- Her backstory is my favorite of my 3 girls I put the most thought into it I think and I like the kind of character she’s become from it

- Her stand is also my favorite of the three ahdbfksb I just think it’s a neat concept and I tried to challenge myself with the design and I’m happy with what I came up with

- I like that she’s a little bit going through it in her life. She has a lot of room for growth and depending on the canon she doesn’t get to go through it <3

- She’s really easy for me to draw AHDKFB…

- She collects knives which I think is fun and all of them are illegal

Agnolotti

- She went through a big punk phase in college and was in a band with two of her friends which I think is very fun and epic of her

- I tried to challenge myself with her design a little too and I like what I came up with but on the downside she never agrees with me when I try to draw her

- She’s highly independent and smart and she doesn’t really put up with shit from anyone ahandndsgs

- I like the way her stand works hdjsvsj idk I just think it’s cool and like a mix of Beach Boy and Stone Free and yea

- I like that she’s sort of calmed down from her punk phase since she was younger but never fully let go of it so she’s still got most of her piercings from the time and still likes to dress that way when she can idk it’s a silly thing but I enjoy it.

Risotto

- He’s so so fucking huge and large I love that (canon can say he’s 6’1” all they want I know in my heart he’s 6’7”) His boobs are so big because that’s where he stores all his love for his team

- Metallica is so cool I think it’s such a neat stand and the little beans are so cute hggshs

- I like that he very obviously cares for his team despite sort of acting like he doesn’t. Idk they’re just a weird fucked up family in a sense like sometimes they can’t stand each other but they care about each other

- My brain is starting to get scrambled from answering all these asks but Hsggshssh His dimples when he smiles… ok king….

- He really had sm potential I really think he should’ve beat Doppio in the Metallica fight and taken over as the main antagonist of part 5 I think it would’ve been so good and tied together so nice with La Squadra wanting revenge for sorbet and gelato.

Formaggio

- Stupid idiot king who’s so so smart actually. I’ve been over it before I will not explain again.

- I genuinely think his stand is cool if I was in Vento Aureo I would throw hands with Illuso for making fun of it. I’d hype Formaggio and little feet up here comes a special boy you better fucking cheer and clap!!!

- He’s everyone’s friend and I love that. He’s so chill and easygoing I would love to hang out with him.

- I love his colors in the manga he looked so fun and punk and then the anime made him a circus clown :(

- I think everyone overlooks that he has very pretty eyes actually :)

[cafedanslanuit]

MC having her wisdom teeth removed || Mystic Messenger Edition! - RFA + Saeran

a/n: I was requested this headcanon for Obey Me and I mistakenly wrote this instead lol. Later, I wrote and posted the original request, but I liked how these turned out <3 Enjoy~

Zen

He carries you bridal style as soon as the doctor’s over

“I knew we were getting married!!!!!!!” you giggle

This man is already dead

Of course he’s thought about marrying you but he’s about to drop you on the spot

When he carries you inside your apartment, you squeal.

“Our new home, Zenny! Baby, this place is so cute!!”

It’s… it’s your own apartment, MC. We’ve been living together for two years, get on board.

He helped you get into bed, but when he tries to leave, he feels you tugging on his pants.

“You need anything, babe?”

“This is wedding night, come love me, please”

“MC, rest a bit and--”

“But I need some loviiiiiing, Zenny. Gimme some loving, hubby”

This man is so flustered about you saying all these things about weddings and especially wedding nights. He manages to tuck you into bed and goes to the living room. He’s about to start making dinner when he listens to your voice again.

“Seveeeen, Zen doesn’t wanna give me a wedding night!”

He returns to the bedroom to see you managed to find your phone. He tucks you into bed again and then feels your phone buzzing from numerous notifications from the chat. He’s sure Seven just told everyone about your call.

“Best husband ever” you mumble and finally close your eyes, nuzzling into your sheets. Zen smiles softly.

He’s so in love with you, he might just ask you to marry him anyday now.

Yoosung

He helps you get into a cab and holds your hand on the way home.

He thinks he doesn’t have anything to worry about until a song comes on the radio.

“All the time I turn around brothas gather round” it’s mostly babbling than singing, so Yoosung just watches you, amused. “Always looking at me up and down looking at my…” you proceed to moan really loudly, startling both your boyfriend and the driver

He apologizes profusely, tipping him extra when you reach home

He helps you sit on the couch and you start mumbling again.

“Baby shark, do do do do do…”

Yoosung can’t help but laugh and think how cute you look.

But once again…

“Ahhh, push it, push it real good…” you sing, waving your arms randomly. “Oh baby, baby, oh baby baby… push it good”

You’re gonna kill Yoosung one of these days omg

Jaehee

“Hey cutie” you greet her. She doesn’t think much of it and just helps you get on a cab and then back home.

“You inviting me to your home? Wow, you nasty. I like that” you slur, tripping a little before crashing into her couch. Jaehee raises an eyebrow, concerned.

“Don’t be shy, you’re very pretty. Like… really pretty. Are you gay?” you ask with a giggle. Your girlfriend sits next to you, trying to contain her laugh.

“I’m actually bi”

“Then I have a chance!” you laugh. “Wanna date me? I can be so good for you, baby, come on gimme some sugar”

You then proceed to do kissing noises at her, which ends up with Jaehee cackling a loud laugh.

She doesn’t want to ever forget you like this.

Jumin

When he puts his arm around your shoulders to steady you while you walk, you take his hand away.

“I’m married, stop!” you scold him, flaunting your wedding ring to him. You cross your arms against your chest. “Don’t make a move, my husband should be here any minute now”

He tries and convince you he’s your husband, but you’re not listening to any of that

He finds it adorable, though.

Jumin takes your arm and help you walk, saying he will respect your relationship.

When you reach the penthouse, you say hello to Elizabeth the third. “Elly, mommy’s here! Where’s your daddy? When’s daddy coming home?”

Jumin’s whole face turns red. He ignored completely you calling his beloved pet “Elly” just because he had never heard you refer to Elizabeth as your daughter. It was like a little family and he felt his heart fluttering at your words.

“Where’s daddy, Elly?” you ask again and watch her walk to Jumin and rub her face on his leg. You furrow your eyebrows, confused.

“Jumin will be here in a second” Jumin assures you. “Why don’t you take a nap?”

You eye him with suspicion but then let yourself fall ungraciously to the couch. “Lemme know when he gets home, I miss him” you grumble.

He’s so going to make a family with you someday.

Saeyoung

Not only does this man encourages you to say the dumbest and funniest things but he will record everything to torment you later

“My eyes are thirsty!” you cry, while Saeyoung holds his phone in front of you. “Baby, my eyes are thirsty!”

“Who do you love the most?” he asks.

“My baby” you reply with a grin.

“And who’s your baby?”

You take a few moments before replying.

“...I’m baby”

“What do you think about Jumin?”

“He should get laid”

“Jaehee?”

“I’m a bit gay for her, no lie”

“Zen?”

“You love him more than me!!!” you cry again, putting your hands on your face. “Because his hair is longer you love him more than meeeee”

“I love you the most, MC”

“Fuck you, you made my eyes thirsty” you mumble, looking away from him.

Someone help Saeyoung, he’s about to pee himself from all the laughing.

Saeran

He didn’t expect you to be so confused when he finally got you home after the surgery.

As soon as you look at Saeyoung you gasp. You look at him again, then back at Saeran, back at Saeyoung and start crying.

“Who’s my baby!?” you whimper. Saeran rolls his eyes while Saeyoung starts laughing loudly.

“I’m Saeran” your boyfriend sighs, sitting down on the couch.

“No, I’m Saeran. You’re Saeyoung!” Saeyoung says, sitting on your other side. You look back and forth between the twins.

“Hey, stop, don’t break my girlfriend”

“MC, look, look!” Saeyoung says. He put a serious and bored face. “I’m Saeran, I’m no fun and all I do is eat flowers and hoard ice-cream on the fridge”.

Saeran rolls his eyes again.

“I don’t eat flowers, why don’t you just g--”

“SAERAN!” you yell, hugging Saeyoung, who starts laughing again. “Baby, where were you, huh?”

Before anything else happens, Saeyoung leaves you with Saeran, even if his laughter can still be heard from his bedroom.

“You’re such a mess” he whispers. You smile at him and let yourself fall on the couch.

“Yup, but I’m Saeran’s mess. I’m my baby’s mess” you mumble.

He can’t help but smile as well, as he covers you body with a blanket to keep you warm while you sleep.

[angstyaches]

okay but i’m in love with the concept of bamf! Charlie and vulnerable! Shayne could i have some of that please?? 🍄

WHoa, look who finally got back to posting fics. I edited it SO MUCH, so there are probably inconsistencies, but I literally cannot look at it anymore.

Takes place a few days after Frost/Bite.

CW: nausea, panic, supernatural elements, possession, body sharing, slight possessiveness (maybe? could be interpreted like that?)

_

Shayne gulped and tried to breathe, tried to situate himself properly in his surroundings. He hadn’t imagined he would reunite with Charlie in a place like this; an abandoned section of railway ten minutes outside of the town, where Elliott said Nancy often came out to practice enchantments and where Ryan sometimes took the boys to practice combat and hunting techniques. In a way, it was like the Aldridge’s backyard, despite being nowhere near the townhouse itself.

He hadn’t imagined reuniting with Charlie much at all, really, since the idea alone was enough to make his lungs feel like they were collapsing. And now that the time had come, his stomach was twisting, and his body was trembling and cold, and there was no room left in him for anything else.

“You doing okay, buddy?” Felix asked.

Shayne groaned and kicked the toe of his boot against the metal railing at the edge of the train track. Flakes of rust dropped away into the frost. 

“You’re excited to see your friend, right?”

“Excited?” Shayne looked up, searching Felix’s face for any hint of sarcasm. “Should I be excited?”

“Sure? Maybe?” Felix glanced at Elliott, whose face made it clear that he didn’t intend to get involved. Felix’s own face made it clear that he regretted opening his mouth at all. “You want to see Charlie, right?”

“Yeah.” Shayne swallowed and shifted his feet in the icy grass. “I just – I feel sick, more than anything else.”

“Well, what did you devour a demon for, when you knew you were gonna be seeing Charlie soon?” Elliott snapped, losing hold of his stoic silence. “Is there a brain in that head of yours, or is it just vapours?”

Shayne gulped and tried not to visualise the entity’s soul that was currently being squeezed into the other dimension by his insides. He spent most of his waking hours trying not to visualise this, but anxiety and panic made it harder to distract himself. He’d hunted that demon in preparation for this specific day, but now, the pain – coupled with the apprehension – was rendering him unbearably nauseous, and he was starting to wonder if it had even been worth the effort.

“I don’t know what to say to him, after – after everything that’s happened.”

Elliott hummed pointedly. “I’d start by apologising for that shit you said outside his house, when you didn’t know he was listening.”

“I don’t think anything you’re saying is helpful, Elli,” Felix grimaced.

“I also tried to eat him.”

Felix cleared his throat. “I’m sorry; what?”

“Mmhmm, twice.” Shayne paced back and forth in front of the two of them, slowing when the frantic movement made his stomach cramp. “Once as Charlie Two, and once as just Charlie.”

“Hey, that…” Felix chuckled. “I’m sure that sounds worse than it –”

“I tried to chew off his hand.”

“O-kay,” Felix sang, drawing out the O as he mashed his gloved palms together.

“Either way, I think he just pulled up,” Elliott pointed out, nodding towards the slope in the hill. Next to the Aldridge’s car was Trevor Waters’ green Fiat.

And in the end, everything happened too fast.

Shayne wished he could remember the moment he saw Charlie get out of his car and come towards him. If his heart skipped a beat upon being scooped into an embrace, he couldn’t recall. All he knew was that suddenly he had a face full of Charlie’s jacket, and a head full of the smell of him, and a hollow clawing in his stomach that he couldn’t quite put a name to. 

At least he was sure it wasn’t hunger this time.

After what could have been moments or hours, Charlie pulled back to look at Shayne’s face. He hadn’t gelled his hair up, so it was hanging like a clump of soft yellow feathers across his forehead.

His eyes, though, were darkened by something, and that initial haziness fell away as quickly as snow sliding from a tree branch. Shayne swallowed and lowered his gaze to the collar of Charlie’s denim jacket, to the coating of artificial fur inside his hood.

“Something’s wrong,” Charlie breathed. “Isn’t it? Look at me.”

Shayne flinched at the feeling of a hand on his cheek. The jolt of fear was followed by hot, scalding anger; all he’d done for months was long for Charlie to be close to him, and now that he was, his body was doing nothing but betraying him. He shut his eyes, feeling close to tears, but he didn’t know if they would be tears of relief or fear or frustration.

“Shayne, please.”

His gaze flicked up for just a second, before he glanced away again. The temperature of Charlie’s hand seemed to drop, and his hold tightened.

“I’m – Charlie, I’m fine –”

“Shayne.”

Gulping against the second swell of fear in as many moments, Shayne felt his face guided again by Charlie’s grasp. Charlie’s eyes moved back and forth between his; what Shayne saw in them was not the softness he’d come to recognise, but an abject kind of fear.

Like Charlie was staring down something from one of his own night terrors.

“You devoured a demon?”

It was barely a question.

Shayne swore that a deep shadow – a shadow with its own face and its own voice and its own touch – slithered across Charlie’s face, settling in the iris of his left eye, spreading like an oil spill in the dazzling blue.

Charlie’s fingers began to slip the longer Shayne didn’t reply, didn’t deny what he’d been accused of. He practically flung Shayne’s face out of his grip.

“You – you’re still devouring demons? You’ve been…”

Shayne felt his lips start to tremble; all he wanted in the world was for Charlie to stop, to just please stop looking at me like I’m a monster –

“You came here to – I mean, I thought you came here to get away from all that.”

“I-I did, I –”

“You took yourself out of school, away from Mulberry, away from… everything.” Charlie laid a hand on his own chest at this; the back of his hand was pocked with the shadows of darkened veins, of something else coming through. “I thought it was so you wouldn’t have to do this anymore?”

The nausea Shayne had been fighting so hard to keep under control suddenly had a dark, burning grip. The look on Charlie’s face was enough for Shayne to be sure that his stomach was going to turn. He was used to being the object of someone else’s disgust, but he’d never prepared himself for this, for Charlie to –

“Charlie…” As he said the name, Shayne saw that shadowy chasm in Charlie’s left eye deepen. The fear finally churned Shayne’s stomach and made his hair bristle. “C-CT,” he stammered.

“Was it you two?” Charlie demanded, turning on Elliott and Felix. “Was it you two, or your foster parents? Motherfucking bloodsuckers, who did this? Fucking answer me!”

Stop, Shayne needed to say. He needed to tell Charlie that this was all on him, he’d made the decision himself, that the Aldridges weren’t to blame. But the words caught in his throat, the dread felt like a weight in his stomach, and the tormenting thoughts came in like a wave.

Doesn’t he know? This is what I am.

This is what I’m for.

This is all I’ll ever –

It wasn’t until a trembling started, in the ground and in his bones, that Shayne snapped himself out of it and realised what was happening. The tracks groaned under the pressure suddenly being shot through the wood and metal, as though an invisible train was suddenly hurtling towards them.

“Charlie,” Felix was saying softly, proceeding with his palms outstretched in front of Elliott, whose fists were tightly drawn by his sides. “Listen, we – we care about Shayne just as much as –”

“Quiet,” came a steady cry that seemed to penetrate the logic of regular sound and reverberate through the air. “You bastards only see him as a tool, don’t you? Just like the Devines.”

“N-no,” Felix blurted out, never taking his widening eyes off of Charlie. “That’s not – that’s not true at all…”

The ground beneath Charlie’s feet swirled with sickeningly black darkness. The fingers of his left hand curled outward like chipped, grey branches, clutching at the air as though they were directly gripping something.

A sharp crack made Shayne jump, made his knees tremble, and he realised a plank of wood built into the train tracks had splintered and buckled upwards. Felix seemed to notice it too, and he took another step back, drawing Elliott with him. Shayne’s breath quivered as he sidestepped another plank as it warped and snapped, until he finally knocked the heel of his boot on the rusted iron rail and sent himself stumbling. 

He almost caught himself, but then his legs finally sagged and he let himself sink to the ground, clutching the railing with one hand and his stomach with the other.

This isn’t happening. This isn’t your body. This isn’t –

“I took him to the forest so he could devour a demon.”

Shayne’s eyes widened as he heard Elliott speak up. He looked up to see that Charlie’s attention had snapped around to focus on the taller of the Aldridges. Felix’s body sagged slightly, and he lightly clutched at Elliott’s arm.

“Speak,” Charlie and CT snapped, and a wisp of their deep grey fog rose in front of Elliott’s face.

“I took him out to the forest the day before yesterday,” Elliott went on. His face deepened into a frown as his neck and shoulders rolled lightly, mirroring the twist of CT’s curved fingers. His eyes met Shayne’s briefly. “So he could hunt. I also took blood from him.”

Shayne physically flinched on the ground; he couldn’t think of a single reason to reveal that to Charlie, especially at this particular moment. He hugged his stomach, saliva building in his mouth as cold sweat coated his skin.

“You took his blood?” Charlie’s voice trembled with anger and surprise. “You really have no idea how afraid you should be of me, bloodsucker. You have no idea how far I will go to keep him safe from abominations like you.”

“I needed to,” Elliott grunted, his voice heightening. “To… to get us back home. The snow had gotten us lost and I was so weak, and he was – he was in pain and he was freezing, and I could barely keep my head up. I was so dizzy, and he was so –”

Elliott was spilling out the explanation with seemingly little-to-no control, for someone who usually liked to get right to the point.

“He… he needed my help, and I needed his,” Elliott choked out weakly.

Shayne realised it must have been Charlie forcing the truth out of him. Usually, even using his telekinesis around other people made Charlie nervous. And yet, this…

This.

This was his Charlie.

“Ch-Charlie, stop,” Shayne whimpered. His heart clenched and his stomach flipped over again as that gaze was turned on him, CT’s eye burning like black coals leaking smoke, and Charlie’s eye weeping furious tears.

Both, he realised, were prepared to kill for him.

“Elliott, he – he didn’t… I asked him to take me out there,” Shayne whimpered, barely resisting the urge to curl in on himself. “It was m-my decision, and it was – it was probably a stupid one, but that’s the truth.”

His heart pounded as Charlie considered him. Shayne was practically cowering on the ground, but he had the feeling Charlie was taller than he usually was. CT’s demonic fingers were still twitching and curling by his side, causing the pressure in the ground to come through the metal railing and into Shayne’s spine.

“I don’t believe you,” Charlie said. “I can’t believe you.”

Cold fear coursed through Shayne’s gut. “It’s the truth,” he whispered again.

“Why – why would you?” Charlie’s voice almost back at the same level as it always was. Slowly, the black flames began to lick a little higher around his legs, the sunken form of CT’s skull seeping through to the left side of his face.

“I-I –”

Charlie dropped to a crouch and clutched the opposite railing with his branch-like fingers. The metal creaked and the wood began to warp again, closing in around Shayne’s legs like weathered, splintering snakes.

“How could you?”

“I –”

“You left me behind,” Charlie growled, “so you wouldn’t have to do that, unless you LEFT ME BEHIND FOR NOTHING –”

“No.” Shayne found himself shrinking back, arms wrapped around his waist, trembling with the fear of what was inside him; of what he was to the creature standing in front of him. “The last – last time we were alone together, I – I almost hurt you.”

Shayne felt like the rest of the world was being warped as Charlie leaned forward, pressing down on the tracks with both hands now. 

“You devoured a demon before seeing me,” Charlie said, “so you wouldn’t be tempted. So you wouldn’t hurt me?”

The irony was not lost on Shayne as he attempted to hold himself together, feeling like his entire body could shatter under the intensity of that gaze.

The darkness spiked up through Charlie’s face, dragging his hair back with it. “Shayne, when you hurt yourself, you hurt me. That’s how this works.”

“How...” Shayne’s teeth chattered, his breath hitched. “How what works?”

The tracks stopped groaning, and the shadows sank back from Charlie’s eye sockets.

“When you love someone, asshole.”

Shayne’s chest ached as though he’d just been punched, no room left in his lungs for air. His stomach twisted into a knot that only eased up slightly when he felt the first tears start to roll down his face.

“I… I-I love… I love you, too.”

Charlie blinked, the chasm of CT’s control retreating again as his hair fell softly over his forehead. “Shayne…”

“I’m – I’m sorry, Charlie,” Shayne whimpered. “All I wanted to do was keep you safe and this was the only thing I could think of – I’m sorry that this is all I am, this is all I’m ever going to be good for, and it’s the only thing I can do…”

Shayne was shivering as he curled in on his own body. He was so focused on trying to breathe deeply enough for his lungs to stop aching, that he didn’t realise he’d sunk forward, pressing his forehead against the wooden tracks that no longer vibrated with demonic energy. Over the sound of the sobs that were catching in his throat, he heard words being exchanged.

“Shayne, I’m – oh my god, shit. Um, hey, it’s okay…”

“This - this is - this is all I can do,” Shayne choked out between hitched breaths, no longer sure if he was telling Charlie, or himself.

“It’s alright, man, it’s not just you,” Elliott muttered. “He’s been a fucking wreck the last few days.”

“You, um, need a hand, getting him to your car?” Felix asked.

“No, I’ve got him.” Charlie’s voice soft and careful. A hand - soft, warm, human - rested on the back of Shayne’s head, fingers combing through his hair. “Just give us a minute.”

“I’m sorry,” Shayne whispered through clenched teeth, shivering as Charlie’s touch sent warm shivers over his skin. He nudged his head against the hand, eventually following it upwards so that he was looking Charlie in the eye again. He was dizzy and even more nauseous than before, but he forced himself to focus as Charlie brushed a thumb against his cheek.

“Hi,” Charlie whispered.

“Hey.” Shayne directed his breathless, trembling energy into a half-smile, which made Charlie’s blue eyes light up.

“Miss me?” Charlie let out a self-conscious chuckle as he asked the question, but it hit Shayne in the gut. 

He winced and leaned his cheek into Charlie’s hand again. “Every fucking day.”

[alterrune]

This is an urgent message, to The Creator, read this carefully. As you already know, Adam managed to corrupt the games files, but that isn’t the only thing. Adam is making an AI, code named Albert, that will gain the ability to corrupt every game files in the Altering the Outcome game. However, Adam programmed Albert incorrectly, so the AI will not only be able to escape the game itself but into the internet and any other online system. I don’t know the damage Albert will cause, but it might actually have the ability to gain access to every military and top secret systems in the world, we can’t let this happen, but I have a plan. The AI finished development, but hasn’t been released yet, so we still have time. Albert is currently residing in a digital world that Adam made. The ColorStreak Battalion is currently suppressed inside their minds, but if you can make a bridge into the digital world, the ColorStreak Battalion should be able to reach this digital world and destroy Albert, and maybe, just maybe, the ColorStreak Battalion can regain control. I don’t know much about this digital world, besides that fact that it’s nightmarish and unstable, there is 5 segments to this world, and all info on each segment will be released if the previous segment is completed.

I have info on the first segment.

Segment I: Reformation

This place consists of multiple, liminal, and familiar places. Don’t let this fool you though, this place is more sinister than it meets the eye. There are monsters here, beyond the human imagination, that lurk here. Navigate the area and try to find a way out, but this area is big, and hard to navigate at times, and you might just get lost in the liminal spaces. But if you feel like you’re approaching an exit point, trust your gut and hope it’s an exit.

The digital world, however, also has an effect of the ColorStreak Battalions sanity. If they stay in a certain area for too long, see something that shouldn’t be real or possible, or something familiar, their sanity will decrease. They must check their watches from time to time, they’ll display the amount of time the elapsed, how much distance they made, and how much sanity they have. If they want to regain sanity, they must remember on who they are and where they came from. The lower the sanity, the more they’ll hallucinate and the more twisted the world will become.

Those are all of the details for this message, good luck out there.

(sigh) I can't believe I'm about to do this, but...desperate times call for desperate measures.

(A portal appears from my computer screen, leading to the digital world.)

FOR ALTER AND VIOLET!!!

(Screaming my battle cry, I get a running start, then jump into the portal. After a blinding flash of lights, I land into the digital world.)

Ouch. That was a rough landing.

(Suddenly, I notice that my outfit is completely different. I now wear a blue hoodie with a simplistic Toppat Clan logo printed on it [it's simply a black silouette of a top hat with the letters "TC" visble on it] some khaki pants and some grey slip-on shoes.)

Huh. Must be what I look like in the game world. Now...where am I?

(I look around and notice that it looks like I'm in a twisted version of the airship. I then hear a very familar voice.)

MAKE THE TORTURE STOP! MAKE IT ALL STOP! PLEASE!

That's Alter's voice! Don't worry, kid, I'm gonna save you...

(I run over to Alter, who's bawling his eyes out. I quickly run up to him.)

Alter! It's me, the real-life you!

H-How do I k-know you're not another one of those illusions that keep tormenting me?

With this.

(I bring Alter in for some loving embrace, and start to stroke his hair.)

Alter, you can't let the past haunt you. You've become the leader of your own four-person team, and you've done so much for them, your family, and all the other people you call friends. You've got the powers of the Alter Rune itself, and you've granted those powers to the people at the Wall so Henry and Ellie could escape. You're the hero of the story, and you can't give up now.

(Alter suddenly looks at me with a look of confidence.)

You're right, me. I can't give up, and I won't give up! AND I WON'T LET ADAM WIN!

(Those last few words reverbarate around the room, causing all of Alter's twisted torment chamber to be destroyed.)

Vi's close by. You'll get all of us back, right?

You know it. I'm not just gonna abandon you guys like that!

Good. Head this way!

PLAYER 1 RE-CONNECTED

AWAITING RESPONSE FROM PLAYER 2

(Violet's twisted reality has her trapped in a cocoon of vines. Alter starts to lose focus, but I slap him in the back of the head, snapping him back to the mission.)

Vi! It's me, Alter. IRL me's here too, he broke me out. Now we're here to break you out.

What's the use, Alter...? I dug this hole that we all fell into, so I decided to grow my own plant-based prison as punishment...

(I walk up to Violet and turn her head to look her in the eyes.)

No, Violet. You didn't do anything wrong. If anything, you helped make things better for the entire group. If you hadn't shown up to the airship in the first place, Alter probably wouldn't have gotten Henry and Ellie out, because he needed someone else to pull it off. You've grown friendships the same way you grow plants: with passion. And if you stay in this vine-cocoon prison, those plants will wilt. And you and I both know your green thumb won't allow you to let a plant wilt.

(Violet suddenly smirks.)

You're right. It won't.

(Violet puts two fingers in her mouth and whistles, calling up Leadhead, which spins around and slices the vine cocoon open. She then reaches her arm out, and her sword hops into her open hand.)

I think Henry's this way.

Then what are we waiting for, cuz?

Let's go rescue Henry!

PLAYER 2 RE-CONNECTED

AWAITING RESPONSE FROM PLAYER 3

(Henry's warped reality has him in the crashed remains of the airship's cockpit, with him laying on the remains of the cockpit's floor, curled up into a ball.)

There he is! Kyle, do your thing.

You got it.

(I pick up Henry, lifting him up so he can see me.)

K-Kyle? I-Is that you?

Listen to me, Henry. You've gone through so many great things already. You lawered your way out of prison, you stole a huge diamond using nothing but a scooter and your wits, you became the Toppat Clan's leader within a few short hours, you broke out of the Wall complex with the woman whom you are now married to, and you and her have become the King and Queen of the Toppats. And you may have completed your mission, but you and I both know that you're going to ensure Alter's mission is complete too.

(Henry suddenly gives me a determined look.)

You're damn right I will.

(Henry gets up and shouts "RA DO FOOS", and the words he says echo around the chamber, completely eliminating the simulation.)

Ellie's being kept somewhere north from here. Let's go.

Time to make the last rescue.

PLAYER 3 RE-CONNECTED

AWAITING RESPONSE FROM PLAYER 4

(Ellie's digital prison is a maximum security cell from the Wall. When I arrive with the others, we're quick to see Ellie.)

Do your speech, Kyle.

(muffled noises), Ellie, (more muffled noises).

Wait. There's a noise muffler. One second.

(Violet hits a button, and with a buzz, Ellie can hear us again.)

Okay, try now.

Come on out, Ellie, we know you're a stronger girl than this. You and Henry broke out of the Wall, became Henry's Right Hand Lady, and then became his wife. You caused a riot that ruined Dmitri's 50 years of reputation in one day, and with the help of Alter, Violet and your husband, you've done so many things you should be proud of. You aren't gonna give that up, are you?

(Ellie grins at me with her teeth showing.)

Of course I'm not gonna give it up.

(She smashes the maximum security prison wall, destroying it and the simulation.)

PLAYER 4 RE-CONNECTED

ALL 4 PLAYERS ARE BACK AND READY FOR BATTLE!

Looks like we got the whole gang back together again.

So, where to next, IRL me?

I'm not sure yet...but I think we'll know it when we see it.

SEGMENT I - COMPLETE!

NOW DOWNLOADING SEGMENT II...

[storiesbyl1ck]

The Forest

Before you read the beginning of this Story, I would like to say a few words. This book, was started 3 years ago from a short story competition between some of my friends. The Story was short but I fell in love with the idea of the story. It has been my pride and joy over the past few years, as I have added chapters, rewritten many pages over and over until I liked it. To do this day I have not finished the book. I hate endings, also I am very bad at sticking to one project and with my constant push for a new story this one fell behind the stove. I would like to hear your honest opinion on this first chapter and maybe I will finish it, because god do I love this book. (If I finish it, the rest will be publish on amazon or somewhere) Thank you for reading this short passage, if you did. 

(if there are any errors, I am sorry) 

Chapter 1: Beginning

She wasn’t going to listen to her parents. Her mindless fun in the rain muffled the distressed screams of her father to come back inside. She hopped between the puddles that collected throughout the grass in their yard. As her feet impacted the water tension, she imitated a landing sound of something much larger than her, ‘boom’. She saw herself as a giant. Her imagination took over her mindful thoughts, often leaving her in between the boundary of real life and her mind. It was what her dad called a terrible blessing. She did not want to wear a raincoat, to her, there was no reason to play in the rain if she wasn’t going to get wet. She wanted to feel the water. She stopped and held her arms out on both sides. Her head facing the sky, letting the rainfall swallow her. Her dad gave up trying to get her to come back in. He closed the front door with agitation.

“She is going to catch a cold!” His voice was raised, the sound of irritation lingered in his words. Her mom was in the kitchen stirring up a warm stew, for the cold day. She let out a small chuckle.

“She’ll be fine, I mean look at how much fun she’s having!” He looked through the window to see his daughter laughing and screaming. His anger fell from his face to reveal a small smirk. 

“Well she has to come in soon, it is getting late!” He kissed his wife and began to help her cut carrots for the stew.

She ran through the backyard, back and forth between the patches of dampening grass. It made her feel like she was flying. Especially when she looked up toward the sky. The rain was getting heavier, the intense fall of water had made sight almost a useless sense. But she continued to blindly run around. Laughing and giggling. 

‘Darling... come in now!’ the voice cut through the booming rainfall. She stopped frolicking to hear the off-tone voice of her mother. ‘This way Love!’ She followed the powerful words through the rain. It now sounded like the words were coming from everywhere, no origin of the voice. She looked around through the wall of water that surrounded her. Spinning in circles trying to find her mother. 

‘We are here darling!’ She stopped spinning with her heel, digging it into the mud. Her eyes stared down a passage through the water, it had split open. A clear sight of an opening into the forest. The ground through this split was dry, like it had never been raining.

‘Come on darling I won’t ask again!’ The voice of her mother was coming from inside the entwined trees. Her curiosity spiked, outweighing the foreboding feeling found in the pit of her stomach. She slowly walked down the path through the rain. Holding her hands together, close to her mouth. The rain began to undo the path she had already walked on, closing in behind her with every step. She paused when her feet had touched a crisp press of dead leaves. ‘Come into the trees darling!’ She stood upon the woods at the end of her yard, the towering tree seemed to almost bend over her head. Her attention was taken back from the trees to the voice. 

‘Come on Darling!!!’ Her feet seemed to move on their own as she pushed forward into the ominous forest. A thick fog began to roll in from all directions moving like waves at a beach. It was like smoke, it had an indescribable smell, a smell of horrific flavors. Her curiosity was very quickly replaced with a powerful fear of her surroundings. Her soul-shaking in her own skin. She spun around ready to run back, but it all looked the same now. Her house was no longer in view. She was surrounded by a maze of leaves and branches. This was now a game. 

‘We are the only ones who love you…’ Tears fell from her cheeks landing on the forest floor.

‘Don’t cry, you are safe with us…’ 

“Where is she, it’s almost 9!” Her father was looking out every window of the house, trying to spot his daughter. 

“She is probably playing in the woods honey don’t worry.” The mom finished setting the table for dinner. “If you want, I can go look for her?” “You are getting in this huge mess and you have work tomorrow you need your sleep.” The exhaustion in his eyes showed itself very clearly. But the worried father showed, even more, it was just that look. Her mom smiled with open arms, ready to give a hug of comfort. Her arms wrapped around him as he sighed.

“She never listens…”

“You know her, she always lost in her own head.” She pushed away to see his face and gave him a gleaming smile. “Kind of like you.” She painted a kiss with her lips onto his cheek. “I’ll go find her, you go to sleep.” She got her raincoat and boots as he walked upstairs and climbed into bed. He looked out the window of their bedroom and saw his wife running into the forest with a flood lamp. As she neared the forest the only thing that gave off her location was the light. The light then disappeared into the thick brush and rain. But his mind was in and out of consciousness and his worried feelings drifted above his head. He walked to the comforting sheets and fell asleep within seconds, not hearing the screaming that echoed throughout the rain. 

‘They love us more….’

The voice rang in his head, awakening him in a sweat. His body was twitching from his pounding heart. He couldn’t catch his breath fast enough to scream, He jolted his head to where his wife usually laid. It was empty. He hopped out of bed and ran down the hall to his daughter's room. Dark, the bed was still neatly made the way she left if the morning before. His terrorized self slipped down the stairs, he swung the front door open and stood at the edge of his porch “EVAAAA...ELLIE!” He cupped his hands around his mouth trying to have his word carrying farther through the rain. It had calmed down, but still muffled his cries. After trying once more he ran into the rain and tried again,

“EVA…...ELLIE!” Nothing but the sound of the trees blowing in the wind. He searched the yard for anything that may resemble his family. The Flood lamp shined through the storm, bouncing off the hazed air. His feet could not move faster to the light. A relief pushed him to run faster towards the only hope of his wife and daughter being back in his arms. As he neared the lamp his composure slipped away with the raindrops. The lamp lay on the edge of his yard. The lamp teased the darkness with his collapsing mentality as it began to flicker in and out. Within moments he was engulfed in the midnight atmosphere. Identical to his overwhelming flush of tormenting grief. He collapsed to the wet grass underneath his feet - resting on his knees, his head fell below his shoulders. His attention began to grow inward, towards the emotional desolation and less on the physical world that was surrounding him with torment. 

“They belong to us…”

Voices began to ripple in his thoughts. Till one stood out from the rest:

“DADDY!”

He stood up with determination, the distressed voice drove him into the dark wooded lands, blind. He followed the echoes of his daughter's pleads.

“DADDY PLEASE HELP ME!”

He held his hands out ahead of his steps. He found himself in an opening, a small circular field, surrounded by sturdy oak and evergreens. A dark stump centered in the middle of the plain. A red glow resonated from the top of the remains of a once-great tree. A hushed mumbling surrounded the stub, an incoherent chant. It sounded like it was repeating the same syllables but it was not any language he had heard. His curiosity grew beyond the stump, where a motionless shadow stood. 

“Ellie!?” He pierced his throat with his dry voice, trying to yell over the raindrops. The shadow moved slightly, its head turned to face Forrus. Nothing was describable but its eyes. Headlights filled with anger, the crimson color of its oval eyes impaled his mind. A wave of panic tossed him to the ground. A loud screech came from the creature before it jumped over the treeline. 

“What the fuck…” He laid on his back, his head processing the event.

“Wake up, WAKE UP FORRUS!” he spun around and began hitting his head on the ground. 

“Daddy?” He turned to see his daughter standing behind him.

“Oh my god, Eva… I thought I lost you.” Forrus spoke between quick breathes and tears. 

“You did Daddy…Help me...” Forrus stared at Eva as she slowly faded into the rain. He grabbed for her, but she was gone. 

...

“I TOLD YOU… I DON’T KNOW ANYTHING!” “ALL I KNOW IS THEY ARE OUT THERE LOST, NOW ARE YOUR MEN GOING TO DO THERE JOB AND FIND MY FAMILY!!!” Forrus wanted to believe it was a simple nightmare, but his love, his daughter were still gone. 

 “Sir, we just need to know why you were in the forest. With no sighting of your wife or daughter, the only person on the scene was you.”

“Who...Called you guys?” Forrus’s head was leaning onto his left shoulder. As his neck was incapable of holding all the images in his now broken mind. The two officers looked to each other then back to Forrus. 

“Uh… you did sir.” Forrus looked up to them, confused. “Sir we are not saying you had anything to do with their disappearance, but…” The officer cleared her throat, “That’s what it kind of looks like.”

(Forrus was taken to court for the disappearance of Eva and Ellie, but with lack of evidence He was proven to be guilty and set free. But the image of Forrus being a murderer stuck to everyone. He was outcasted by neighbors and became isolated from the world outside the woods.)

[honeyoongiah]

King! Hoseok

Pairings: Hoseok x Kasia (reader)

Genre: King! Hoseok, fluff, angst, smut 

Words: 10k

Warnings: smut, (mentions of) murder and death, mention of rape, strong language

Summary: King Hoseok was one of the most feared rulers of his time, until a brave young girl turned his life upside down.

"Boring, bring me the next jester.", the young king yawned on his throne. "What shall we do with him, your Highness?"

His knees trembled, his eyes were filled with fear and despair. The jester knew exactly what his king was about to do. Hoseok enjoyed watching him like this. A devilish laugh graced his mouth. "Immediate excommunication."

He had uttered these words innumerable times, every time he spoke with a lightness over his lips. These words meant death. He stared at him trying to capture every detail of his fear.

"Please have mercy on me your Highness, I have a wife and children!" - "Oh well, if that's the case." Relieved he exhaled, but the blood froze in his veins when he noticed the gaze of his king.

"Give the family his corpse with a greeting from their beloved king." Hoseok was widely known as the most brutal and scary ruler of his time. He did not know anything like grace or kindness, much more he enjoyed the suffering of others.

His enemies no longer dared to attack him since he overpowered an army with his strong army and tortured each one personally in the most painful ways.

The jester was led away, his screams echoing through the pompous hall, creating pleasant goose bumps on Hoseok's skin.

His subordinates pity their faces, but that did not bother him. Being the most feared man was a satisfaction to him. He had a great idea. For him at least she was terrific, for the others a death sentence.

"Forget the jester. I'm going to do an unannounced inspection of the castle, and every time I find something that I do not like, someone has to pay with their life."

The eyes of his subjects widened in shock. They felt like he was looking for reasons to punish someone. They were not entirely wrong. Hoseok rose from his custom-made throne and ran off every room in the castle.

Disappointed he had to realize that everything was prepared very precisely according to his wishes and almost wanted to give up, but his last stop was the kitchen. He grinned mischievously when he finally found something he could complain about.

"Are those mushrooms back there?" He asked rhetorically. Of course they were mushrooms. All the cooks and cooks stared rigidly at the ground, dared not look at him let alone answer him.

"You know that I have an allergic reaction to mushrooms, did you want to poison me? I should kill all of you with my bare hands."

At these words all present shuddered. Hoseok let his eyes wander around the room and stayed with a little boy, maybe 13 years old. "Explain why you have mushrooms against my order or I'll have you locked up." He deliberately picked out the youngest, because he would not have an answer to his question.

The uncertainty and fear in his eyes spurred Hoseok even more to torment him. "I-I-your Highness I do not know." Hoseok raised his eyebrows and folded his arms across his chest. "Then I'll have to lock you up."

"No! Your Highness, please let him go!", Suddenly a high voice called from one of the back rows while the little boy was about to be taken away. He was already crying bitterly in fear.

Hoseok's eyes fell on the dainty lady who fought her way through the crowd. So the voice was hers. "Your Highness he is still so young, it's not his fault. Please let him go."

The entire staff looked at them in shock, they could not believe that someone dared to make a request to the king. But that did not interest the young woman. Even if her knees were shaking with fear and she wanted to disappear from the ground when she noticed her king's look.

Something about her irritated the young man. How dare she talk to him without being asked? He should have her beheaded for this impudence or serve his dogs for lunch.

He opened his mouth to ask his men to take her too, but no sound left his throat. The girl still looked intimidated, but he noticed that she was trying to be strong and to not show any signs of being afraid. Her dark shoulder-length hair fell into her chestnut brown eyes and a strand had strayed between her lips.

With a light hand movement she stroked it all out of her face and looked at the little boy who gave her a greatful smile. Then her gaze fell back to her handsome master, who still had not given instructions to anyone yet.

"Let him go, I'm not in the mood anymore.", he murmured unexpectedly and left the large cooking room without further ado. He still heard from a distance how everyone sighed in relief as the little boy, his name was apparently Jungkook, was released and ran into the brave woman's arms.

"You saved my son's life!" the boy's mother shouted and hot tears ran down her cheeks. Hoseok had heard enough and hurried to his huge bedroom.

__________

"Why do you think he spared him and did not cut your tongue off for your frivolous behavior or did something even worse?", her friend asked her as she told her what had happened yesterday.

"I don't know, honestly. But I'm glad Jungkook is fine." The two were sitting on small stools made of wood and peeling potatoes for today's dinner. "Please do not do that again Kasia, you know he's a psychopath. You just had damn luck or a fucking guardian angel watching your back since you survived talking to the king like that."

"If I can try to save a life, I will of course not be silent!" protested the young girl and her friend sighed. "I do not want anything to happen to you."

"I know Elly, I'm careful. I promise you.", Kasia replied, smiling encouragingly. The guard behind the door decided he had heard enough and walked down the great corridors to report to the king.

Already since yesterday evening he sat at his big table and brooded over the past events. Who was this girl? Why did she have such courage and why didn't he kill her?

Normally, he would have been happy to get to kill two people, but an unknown feeling kept him from doing so. He ordered one of his guards to shadow her a bit and tell him what he found out.

"Her name is Kasia.", the young man began, barely older than his master. "Kasia..." Hoseok said after him and let the name melt on his tongue. "Kasia." "She's 24, the same age as you are, your highness. She has a little sister and lives with her and her mother in your castle as a maid. Her father died long ago."

Hoseok nodded and took in all the information. He could feel her pain somehow, since he didn't even get to know his father and his mother died a few months ago.

"Did you find out anything more?", he asked out of curiosity. "Yes, my lord. Her best friend seems to be Elly, one of the maids here too. She likes to walk through the blooming garden, especially at night. Her favorite flower is the sunflower. That's it, sir."

"Fine.", Hoseok murmured absently. He thought about her picking up the beautiful sunflowers he also liked very much and couldn't help but smile for a second.

He didn't like what he was feeling. He wasn't used to this warm feeling building up in his stomach. He wanted to get rid of it as soon as possible. It was her fault. It's her fault that he was feeling some sort of sick? So he decided she had to suffer for it. "Guard?" - "Yes, your highness?"

"Give her and her family the hardest and dirtiest jobs you can find in this castle. And if they don't want to do it you can threaten them with death. I'm in a bad mood so they shouldn't upset me.", he ordered, watching his inferior nodding.

"I'll do as you wish.", he answered and went to let actions follow his words. Hoseok nodded to himself, somehow proud. He felt better almost immediately.

Why did he even waste one second of his time thinking about this little brat? He should have just killed her. But well, now it'll be much more fun since he can watch her and her family suffer for a long time.

Days went by and Hoseok got into his daily routine again. He almost forgot the (very beautiful he had to admit) girl who irritated him so much. He heard her Family was suffering a lot under his orders and that satisfied him. But then she surprised him again with showing up in his dining room, carrying his meal and planting it in front of him aggressively.

"Why are you doing this to us? What did we do to you that makes you being so cruel?", she asked with tears in her eyes. Hoseok looked at her with a shocked expression. What the hell is she doing again? he thought. She has to be insane. Does she want to die so badly?

"How dare you talking to me like this again?", he asked and she looked at him with wide eyes. This was the first time she heard him talking to her and she thought he sounded very soft and gently. The absolute opposite of what he was.

"Y-you know exactly what i mean.", she stuttered intimidated since Hoseok got up from his chair and looked down on her. "My mother fainted yesterday because you give us more work than we can handle. Please stop. I beg you."

Suddenly, another girl entered the room and grabbed Kasia by her arm. "Are you fucking insane now?", she hissed under her breath staring at her friend in disbelief. "I can't watch my mother suffer like this anymore Elly, let go of me!"

Hoseok watched this scene with a small smirk on his lips. She had so much fire in her gaze, it lowkey reminded him of himself when he wasn't the king yet. Always rebellious against his elders although he knew there was a lot he was risking.

"I highly apologize if she made you any discomfort, your highness.", she said without looking him in the eyes and bowed. Then she tried dragging Kasia out of the room, but unfortunately she was stronger than her.

"How did you even get the guards to let you in?", he asked her, earning a confused expression on Kasias face. "I just told them I'm the one who serves you your meal.", she explained. "Your highness.", she added, slowly getting more terrified of this situation since the adrenaline in her blood was sinking and she came to all her senses.

"Wow, the people who are supposed to protect me are idiots.", he laughed. "I should kill them all." Ellys face went comletely pale as she heard him talking about ending someone's life so untroubled and she grabbed her friend once again. "Let's leave, please. I'm not ready to die yet.", she whispered to her.

Kasia nodded, although she wasn't ready to go yet. She wanted to persuade Hoseok to stop overburden her mother, but she didn't want Elly to get into any trouble because of her. "I beg you, your highness. Please think about my words. I don't want my mother to suffer anymore, she means the absolute world to me. I know you loved your mother like i do love mine.", she tried one last time, hoping she didn't cross a line.

But whom did she try to fool? She already crossed all the lines with stepping into this room minutes ago. Although her words were true, Hoseok loved his mother unconditionally and he still did, her words hit his weak spot and got him to think about her death again. One of the worst days in his life. She was the only one in this world who believed in him as Hoseok, not just as the future king.

He tried to shake this thoughts off quickly, staring at both girls with a furious look now. "Leave.", he commanded, turning his back on them. They immediately turned around and almost runned out of there, afraid what would happen if they didn't.

__________

"I'm pretty sure you lost your mind. WHAT THE HELL HAS GOTTEN INTO YOU LATELY? YOU'RE RISKING YOUR LIFE YOU KNOW THAT?!", Elly almost shoutet at her friend as they arrived in her bedroom. "I'm sorry i didn't mean to drag you into this. You shouldn't have come to get me."

"Of Course i did! I can't just watch you run into your death like this." Kasia smiled. "Then you understand why I couldn't stop me from talking to him." Elly sighed deeply, watching her friend getting comfortable on her bed. "Why am I even friends with you?" "Because you love me.", she answered, grinning to her.

_________

Hoseok's thoughts were full of that brave girl. He struggled to banish her from his head. Again she had managed to surprise him and face him in some way no one ever dared to since he was the king of this country. In a way unknown to him, that made him a little happy.

He decided that her courage had to be rewarded and ordered her mother and her to have enough breaks and less work. For the first time in years he did something for someone other than himself.

He would never have thought that it would feel so good. Even without seeing her he could imagine how wide her beautiful smile would be and how her eyes would sparkle when she found out that he had fulfilled her wish.

Although he tried his really hardest to get her out of his mind, he just couldn't. So one night, he decided to use the knowledge he earned through his guard and went to the blooming garden just a few minutes away.

He could see her standing in front of the sunflowers just how he imagined when he got out of bed and got ready to see her. The moon was shining bright as he walked the small path approaching her. She didn't notice him yet, she was too distracted by the beautiful nature in front of her.

When he finally reached her, he didn't really know what to say or do. He kind of just wanted to watch her in silence but he knew that would scare her. "Kasia."

His lips suddenly formed her name so easily but as she turned around with bride eyes to face him, he felt unable to cope the situation again. How come he was so insecure about this?

"Your highness.", she whispered and bowed. After straightening up again, she just stared at him with a confused expression. What was he doing here? She has never seen him in this garden before.

"I just came to see the flowers, don't worry. You did nothing wrong.", he explained. Half of that was a lie, but he wouldn't just admit to her that he wanted to see her so badly. "They are very beautiful aren't they?", Kasia asked rhetorical, looking down on them and smiling again.

"I don't know why, but they comfort me in some type of way. Whenever I'm feeling sad I just walk through this beautiful garden and immediately feel a lot better.", she told him unexpectedly.

"It's good to have something you can hold on to when you seem lost in this world.", Hoseok said, watching her nodd to his words. He felt comfortable with her to just speak out loud what came to his mind. At the end she was just a maid, so who cares? "Do you have something, my lord?"

"Hm?"

"Something you can hold on to I mean." He thought about it and had to admit that the only thing he had was his mother who kept him sane. He felt like he buried his humanity with her.

"I can just imagine how hard being the king has to be. My life and my problems are nothing compared to yours so I really hope that you have something that makes you happy in dark times.", she said so genuine that he felt a warm feeling in his stomach. "It's really nice of you to worry about me."

"Of course I do, you are our king.", she answered slightly irritated. "Oh yeah, of course." This night had some magical haze he thought. He almost forgot that he was the king and she was just one of his hundreds of maids in the castle. "I will go to bed now, have a good night Kasia."

As he turned his back on her, he suddenly felt a light grip on his arm. "I-I'm so sorry, your highness. I just wanted to thank you. You were so gracious and actually listened to my worries, although I was incredibly bumptious to even dare to ask. Thank you so much.", she said honestly and gifted him with a warm smile.

"It's okay. You better learn to watch your mouth though. You can be thankful I was in a good mood these days otherwise you'd be dead by now.", he answered and gave her a smirk. Her smile though slowly faded and she nodded. "Of Course. I highly apologize for my behaviour."

First he didn't know why her mood changed so rapid, but then he could figure it out by looking into her eyes. They were filled with fear. "That was a j-", he wanted to tell her that he didn't mean it, he didn't want her to be afraid, but as he thought about it it was true. Every other person would've been dead by now.

He didn't know why she was still alive, but he couldn't tell her that this was a joke when he coped almost every situation with ending someones life. "Anyway, good night kasia." - "Good night, my Lord." He gave her one last gaze and left with a little smile. ________

"It was kind of strange but it wasn't at the same time? I don't know. It was interesting talking to him though. I think under this mask of power he really is just a human like us.", Kasia told her friend while cooking again.

The night they met surrounded by beautiful flowers and illuminated by the moon was now a whole week ago but she still thought about it a lot. "Under his mask he really is just a brutal sadist who likes to kill people. Open your eyes, please Kasia.", Elly sighed at her innocent mentality. "When he really is just a psychopath, why am I still alive then?"

"I don't have a fucking clue but you shouldn't test him sweetheart." Kasia understood her friend's worries and had to agree that he was indeed a dangerous man and she knew that. Just before she could think more about her king, one of his guards came into the kitchen. "You. Are you Kasia?", he asked in a cold tone.

"Uhm, yes I am.", she answered, her knees feeling weak because of the fear building up in her. "From this day on, you will serve the king his meals. It better be prepared in a few minutes, he's already hungry."

Kasia and Elly looked at each other in surprise. Why would he want that? "He may have a strange obsession with you now. Creepy.", Elly whispered so the guard won't hear her. "Why should he? Don't be so full of prejudices.", she answered, slightly angry now. She didn't know why but it pissed her off when Elly talked about him like that.

"Just be careful okay?" Kasia nodded, sinking into her thoughts again. She was somehow excited to see him. When the food was finished and ready to get served the nervousness in Kasias stomach increased. She tried breathing in and out to calm her but it didn't work.

One of the guards in front of his dining room held the door open for her so she could enter easily. His eyes immediately locked with hers as she walked through the room to reach his table.

"I hope it's all to your satisfaction, my lord.", she finally spoke and smiled slightly. He replied with a smile too and licked his lips finally seeing his meal. After she placed it in front of Hoseok, she bowed and left the room quiet and fast.

This became a daily ritual. She entered, greeted him, smiled, placed his meal in front of him and bowed, then she left. Sometimes, at night when he felt like missing her, he would look outside of his window to find her with the flowers again, but he thought she bloomed even more beautiful than them.

He didn't want to admit it to himself, but his affection towards her grew every time he layed his eyes on her or she gave him a genuine smile. ________

"Did you hear it too?" - "Yes, it's so typical for him. I'm so afraid." Kasia could hear two maids talking from across the room. She tried to listen to their conversation in curiosity. "But I mean he was not wrong. Guards who can't protect the king are useless.", one of them pointed out.

"But he could just fire them, not kill them! I heard he did it with his bare hands...", the other answered, shaking her body while thinking about it. So he really killed the guards? Kasia asked herself. Her eyes filled with tears. She thought it's her fault. If she didn't fool them they would most likely still be alive.

She tried to get rid of these thoughts, swiping away the upcoming tears. Kasia had to focus on her job now. As on any other day she entered the room and placed the plate in front of her king. This time she didn't smile though, and he noticed. Before she could leave he grabbed her wrist and turned her around. "Kasia."

She looked at him in confusion as he pointed to the chair next to him. "I'd like to have your company while eating today." She knew she couldn't refuse, so she sat down in silence. He didn't know what to do, he barely talked to anyone besides he has to. He was clueless of how he could make her smile again.

"Kasia, is something wrong?", he asked directly, earning a shocked expression of her. "N-no, I'm alright. Thank you for asking, your highness." Hoseok just nodded. If she didn't want to speak about it he'd accept that. At least for now. Maybe she just had a stressful day.

"What about you? If I can dare to ask.", she added. Her kings eyes widened in surprise, but then he smiled. He liked that she always cared about his well-being, even if it was just because he was her king.

"I'm fine, now that I have your company even better.", Hoseok answered with a charming smirk. Kasias cheeks immediately turned into a light red as she shyly avoided his gaze.

Her eyes scanned the room but stopped as she detected a new and very beautiful painting on the wall. "Am I allowed to stand up, my lord? I'm not going to leave." Hoseok frowned in confusion but nodded in approval. "Go ahead."

"Thank you." She stood up from the fancy chair and walked around her king to reach the painting. She had to see it from nearer to appreciate the precise work.

"What do you think?", a dark voice suddenly asked behind her. He could feel his breath on her smooth skin which gave her goosebumps. "I like it.", she admitted, her eyes still on the piece of art in front of her. "You do?"

"Yes, it's beautiful and so full of detail. I'm sure this artist is very experienced.", she gushed about it. "I'm glad to hear that. It's my work actually.", Hoseok explained with a little bit of pride in his voice.

He couldn't understand why, but it made him very happy to know that she genuinely liked his work. Painting was his passion he never admitted nor talked about to anyone. She turned around to face him. "It's really yours?"

Both were surprised by how close they stood to each other and Kasia let out a little gasp. She wanted to sidestep by taking a step backwards, but she already felt the wall behind her. "I- I'm so sorry."

Hoseok smiled because of her shy behavior, he found it really cute. "Don't worry Kasia." He didn't take a step back, somehow he wanted to feel her closeness.

"And yes this is my work. Painting is my favorite Hobby. I usually don't share it with anyone, but sometimes I just want people to see it even if they don't know it's from me. I'm really happy that you like it.", he explained, bodies still nearly touching. He could smell her scent, it was a very discreet but so pleasant one that reminded him of the flowers in his garden.

"You are the first one to know this besides my mother. She taught me everything about it since it was her passion too. Maybe I love it so much because it reminds me of all the time I spent with her as a kid."

His heart began to arch in pain, he really missed her. Hoseok didn't receive much love from others in his life but his mother gave him more than enough. To her he was Hobi, her son and never Hoseok the future king. But now she was gone and he felt alone like never before.

He began to drown in his thoughts, staring on the ground as he suddenly felt a hand on his right arm, stroking it gently. "I'm so sorry for your loss." Kasia didn't know why she did this, but she just felt like this was right. He clearly needed comfort and she was willing to give it to him. "I- uh. Thank you Kasia. I don't want to bore you with my pitiful rant any further."

"You don't bore me! Don't say that. I'd be happy to help you, even if all I can do is to listen.", she said in a soft tone. "Well that's because I'm your king and you think you have to do anything to please me or-"

"No it's because you are a human being like any other who lost his mother and needs someone to share his pain and thoughts with. Just because you are our king doesn't mean that people can't care for you as a person. I do care okay?", she interrupted him with her babble.

His Eyes widened as her words echoed through the dining room. "I'm sorry for interrupting you, I didn't want to be disrespectful but I don't want you to think that the only thing that defines you is your status. You sure are so much more than that and you shouldn't forget that."

And there it was again, the fire in her eyes he admired the most. They began to shine so brightly when she was talking about something that was important to her. "You think so?" "Yes I do.", she answered confidently, adding a smile on her lips. He didn't know what to say, so he just smiled back and cleared his throat. "So... thank you. You can go for today."

She nodded and walked towards the door. "I'll see you tomorrow.", he added, already having a warm feeling in his stomach thinking about it. She turned around one last time to smile brightly before heading towards the room she shared with her family.

_________

A few days later Hoseok decided to go for a walk and hopefully meet Kasia again. He slowly realized how attached he became to her but he didn't mind anymore. Why shouldn't he just do what made him happy?

Somehow she managed to make his days happier and brighter just with her presence. By now it became normal that she sat with him while he took his meal so they could talk a bit.

They got to know each other a little better each day and he liked how he felt around her. Hoseok felt like his personal qualities mattered to her. It was like balm for a soul marked by loneliness for many years.

He was surprised to not see her around the sunflowers but sitting under a tree a few meters away. She had a book in her Hands and seemed to be drown in it.

"Good afternoon madame.", he greeted and sat down next to her. She was surprised by the form of adress he used towards her, but couldn't deny that she liked it. "Good afternoon, your highness."

"Please call me Hoseok from now on.", he asked while she put her book to the side, surprised by this himself. Kasia looked at him with insecurity. "Are you sure about this?", she asked. She felt like this was a big step. Being allowed to call the king by his name? An honor not even all noblemans have. "Yes I am sure."

"Thank you, I don't even know what to say. But... why?" She looked at him with curiousity. "There is no reason to thank me, you earned it. You are the only one I know who sees me as a person first and then as the king. I really appreciate that. It's good to have a safe space where I can be myself for a couple of minutes.", he explained, expressing his feelings. Hoseok had to think about their first real conversation, right here in the beautiful nature, lighted by the moon.

They talked about having something to hold on to when it feels like being lost in this world, and he realized that in this short amound of time she became this thing for him. "I'm happy that you feel like this.", she smiled softly.

"Oh what's this?", he asked noticing a bunch of papers next to her book after a couple minutes of comfortable silence. "Actually I came here to draw after reading a little bit, having the beautiful garden and your painting as my inspiration.", she admitted. "You are an artist too? How come I don't know?"

"To be honest I wanted to tell you the day I saw your painting but we changed the topic so fast that I forgot.", she laughed. "I love to draw and paint, it's my hobby too." - "Would you mind showing me something?"

She grabbed the papers she took with her and handed them to him. "These are just little doodles though." Although she said that, he found her art very beautiful. "I love your technique.", he stated, totally focussed at every line she drew.

"Thank you, but it's nothing compared to you." - "That's not true! You are very talented and I hope you can show me more in the future." She nodded happily. "I hope to see more of your paintings too."

Suddenly, he stood up and reached out his hand. Confused she let him help her get up and collecting her things. "Where are we going?", she asked while walking beside him towards the castle again. "I'm gonna take you to my atelier.", he grinned, looking in her beautiful eyes. "Oh really? Now I'm excited to see!" Silently they walked through the great corridors and halls until they reached an area Kasia has never been to.

"I didn't want someone to find it so I used a room far away from everything.", he explained as she looked around. The atelier was not as big as the rest of the rooms in the castle but he didn't need that much space for his stuff. It was filled with several paintings and of course everything hoseok would need to paint.

"Wow this looks like paradise.", Kasia said, still overwhelmed. "Yeah it is for me.", he laughed. "You can come here to work on your art from time to time if you want." Sharing this room with her was the most intimate thing he has ever done. She watched how his lips curve to a bright smile.

He looks like the sun itself she thought, her cheeks turning red. While looking around and admiring more of his work she noticed the painting he was currently working on, still placed on the easel. She widened her eyes in surprise recognizing her own face. "I-Is this me?", she asked him, pointing her finger to it. At this point there was no way he could deny that he tried to capture her in his art.

Every excuse would make it just much more awkward he thought. "Uh, yes it is.", he answered, trying to sound confident. "Uh, yes it's you. You inspired me, I guess. It's not finished yet." She took a few steps closer to examine it. "Wow this is very good. I'm not as beautiful as you let me look like here though.", she said shyliy, trying to hide her red face.

"Don't say that, you are much more beautiful than I could ever paint you Kasia.", he spoke his thoughts out loud. Seeing her being shy somehow gave him back his confidence.Maybe because he found it so cute he wanted to see more of it? As expected Kasia just turned red even more, hiding her face behind her hands. "Hoseok, stop! You make me blush."

It was the first time he heard her saying his name out loud and it immediately set free hundreds of butterflies in his stomach. How come she could turn him so soft with such little things? "Kasia, look at me.", he demanded, grabbing her wrists to remove her hands from her face. She looked up, waiting for him to say something but he didn't. He just returned her gaze, silently admiring her eyes and watching how her cheeks still had this adorable shade of pink.

Kasia noticed him breathing heavier and faster than usual, but she felt the same way. Her heart was beating twice as fast as she could feel his breath on her skin. She wanted to say something and slightly parted her mouth, but nothing came out.

Now this had caught his attention, his gaze wandering from her eyes to her soft-looking lips. His left hand found its way to her cheek, gently stroking her smooth skin. He decided to just do what felt right, and with Kasia that was everything.

Neither his nor her status was important to him, he admired her as a person as much as she did admire him. Slowly he leaned towards her, looking in her eyes again for a sign that she wanted it too. She had already half closed them and waited for his touch. Hoseok gently put his lips onto hers, his hand wandering to her hair to pull her closer.

She hummed in approval, causing him to smile into the kiss. Kasias hands clung to his silk shirt, not yet ready to break away from him. The way their lips moved complementary, as harmoniously as if they were made for each other. As if their only purpose was to show their innocent affection.

Hoseok was the first who broke the kiss, needing air and wanting to look at her again. She slowly opened her eyes too, meeting his gaze. Neither of them wanted to say something, they just wanted to enjoy the moment as it was, no unnecessary words. Words couldn't express their feelings anyway.

___________

"And then he kissed me. It was... I can't even describe it.", Kasia told her friend, although she was pretty sure it would just concern her. She did it anyway because Elly was her best friend and of course she needed to talk about it with her. "He did what?!"

Kasia just giggled at the shocked expression of her. "Oh my god you and the king are a thing." - "That even rhymed.", Kasia laughed. "But I don't know what this is between us. I mean at the end of the day I am just a maid and he is the king. Maybe he just wants to have some fun."

"I still don't trust him completely but that doesn't sound like he just uses you to kill his boredom. I think he likes you." Suddenly, they heard a knocking on her door. She stood up and opened it just to find a guard holding a bunch of sunflowers in front of her face. Surprised she took them, admiring how beautiful they were. She could notice that even the guard had to smile about this sweet gesture.

"I have never seen him like that and I know him his whole life. I don't know what you are doing but you are doing it good.", he whispered so no one else would hear. ___________

"There will be a big party tonight. Many rich and powerful people will come but honestly, I would rather sit here with you. They just want to kiss ass so they can use me when they need me anyway. I can't stand this whole fake laugh and being friendly anymore. But it's what I have to do.", Hoseok complained and sight heavily.

Kasia put her hand on his and gave him an encouraging smile. "I can imagine how exhausting that is, but you can do it. I'll be there too and serve the guests. Use me as a moral support." she said. They sat together under the tree and enjoyed the warm sunshine on their skin.

"Then I'll look over to you when I feel like giving up, that will give me back my strengh." he replied with a cheeky grin and she looked away embarrassed. Their first kiss was a few days ago, since then Hoseok has been giving her little gifts like the bouquet of sunflowers to make her smile. The last gift were very high quality and expensive brushes and pens so she could paint even better.

The next time she saw him, she had stormed towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck, saying thank you at least a hundred times. It was the first time that she dared to act so gaily and he enjoyed it very much. Kasia closed her eyes for a moment and leaned her head against his shoulder. A cool breeze ran through her hair as he gave her a gentle kiss on her scalp.

____________

The hall was noble and festive decorated as the first guests entered and looked around. A group of musicians played pleasant sounds in the background as Kasia ran through the crowd with a tray and handed everyone a welcoming champagne. She paused when Hoseok entered the room and straightened his suit.

The guests clapped and bowed as he greeted the first people with a smile. Kasia couldn't help but stare for a while before continuing with her job. Now and then she glanced over to check if he was okay, but he seemed to be doing pretty good.

Hours went by and she slowly got tired of running around all the time. She decided to take a small break and went to the kitchen to drink some water and sit down for a while. Her mother worked with her today, that made Kasia feel a little better because she could keep an eye on her so she wouldn't overwork.

Just as kasia re-entered the room, she could feel two eyes sticking to her. She turned and expecting to see hoseok, but it was a stranger a few feet away from her talking to another man. Even when she caught him, he did not turn away but started to smile slightly. Something about his smile made kasia uncomfortable. He looked like he was up to nothing good she thought. She chose to ignore him and support her colleagues.

Meanwhile, Hoseok was sitting on his throne, one noble after the other, desperate to talk to him. He was bored but he had no choice but to bear it and to be glad that it was over soon. He thought of Kasia and how they could go for a walk later, and refrained from smiling.

He scanned the room with his eyes, but she could not be found. He frowned, he was sure she had just taken a break, because he had happened to see her with her mother. She was a diligent person and would never hide from work. Where could she be?

He just grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the room. No one came to help her even as she asked for it, because he was a noble and no one dared to oppose him. He dragged her into one of the countless rooms and closed the door.

Then he pressed her against the wall with his body, his hands on her hips. "I just saw you coming in and I think you're really pretty. I have a wife, but how about you becoming my mistress?" he chuckled, looking deep into her eyes. He smelled of alcohol but did not seem very drunk yet.

Kasia was afraid to fight back, he was much more powerful and stronger than her. He grabbed rudely into her hair and pulled her head to the side. "I asked you something, you fucking slut." he suddenly shoutet aggressively. "I know that you want me anyway. Cheap girls like you would do anything to suck a noble cock, am I right? You're all the same, spreading your legs without hesitation for a little bit money."

She swallowed hard and did not know what to do to calm him down. She just wanted to get out of here, out in the garden under the tree and doodle on her papers with hoseok. He punched the wall with his fist next to her head what made her flinch. "You still don't want to talk? You know what? It's okay, I'll make you scream with my cock."

He let his hand disappear under her skirt, which made her gasp in surprise. He grinned dirty when he heard it. "Finally, a reaction." he said, rubbing between her legs. Kasia got sick, she tried to wriggle out of his grip but she had no chance.

Just when she wanted to give up, her eyes pressed together, praying that it would soon be over, she heard a strange noise and a surprised sharp intake of air. She felt something warm running down her cheek as she felt the grip loosen around her and she dared to open her eyes.

Kasia saw the man's lifeless body right in front of her, his eyes and mouth still opened wide in surprise. She noticed that she was standing in a puddle of blood and she stopped breathing for a moment.

Suddenly she heard a slight chuckle and looked up at Hoseok, whose face and hands were full of blood as well. He held a knife in his hand and laughed at the corpse in front of him. "What an idiot."

"What have you done?", she asked in shock, looking back and forth between him and the dead body. Hoseok's smile slowly disappeared, he did not understand her question. "What do you mean? I protected you."

Kasia's eyes filled with tears and mingled with the blood on her cheeks as they fell down. "By killing someone?!" - "He almost raped you, he didn't deserve it any other way.", he said without hesistation.

"You just ended someone's life! He sure had a family...", she sobbed. "I don't understand you. I just wanted to help you, to protect you.", he said honestly, confusion on his face.

"Hoseok you can't just solve every goddamn problem with killing! I really thought you changed, I saw you being so nice and gentle with me, I thought you are more than what people think of you, but I was wrong. You are a monster."

Hoseok let the knife fall down on the floor with a clink as he saw how scared Kasia truly was. "Kasia...", he tried to take a step closer to her, but she flinched and shut her eyes. "Don't come near me. Don't come near me ever again.", she said in a shaky voice and left the room, leaving Hoseok alone with what he has done.

She ran out of the castle, ran as fast as possible until her legs wouldn't hold her anymore and she broke down on her knees. She still cried and threw up thinking about what happened just minutes ago.

_________

Hoseok didn't see Kasia for a long time. She refused to bring him the Food as she used to and he accepted it. He thought she needed time and space and he would give it to her, even though it almost killed him not having her around anymore.

She also did not go to the garden any more, neither by day nor by night, and she did not visit his atelier anymore either.

Time went by and Hoseok didn't even know how long he didn't see her beautiful face, smelled her bloomy scent or touched her soft skin. Every inch of his body missed her and his longing for her to come back to him grew with every second.

He didn't know what to do anymore, he gave her time but it didn't seem to help at all. Didn't she miss him too? Hoseok wanted to know. He wanted to know if she was alright and how she felt these days.

He decided that he couldn't wait any longer and had to take action. He sent one of his guards to get her and if she would refuse to come with him by choice he was allowed to force her but without any violence.

Hoseok wouldn't ever allow any harm to his precious woman. He stood in his bedroom, he thought it was the most private place they could talk, and waited for his guard to come with her.

He opened the door when hearing knocking noises and his eyes immediately laid on Kasia, which tried to avoid his gaze. The guard softly prodded her into the room and closed the door with his king's command.

Now they stood in the same room, neither of them speaking a word. It hurt Hoseok, it hurt him so much that he almost felt sick.

He hated this feeling of sickness. He didnt want this anymore. Suddenly he knew how to stop those strange feelings. He wanted her. If he was able to have her, all this pain would have an end.

"Oh fuck it.", he shouted and crossed the room in a few steps. Aggressively Hoseok grabbed Kasia by the hair and pushed his lips onto hers. Kasia was shocked and didnt dare to move.

Fear was growing in her stomach together with something she couldnt figure out yet. What was he doing? The young man roughly touched her and deepened the kiss.

Now Kasias body came back to life, trying to push him away but she wasnt strong enough. Stop, she tried to say, but his lips still covered her mouth.

"Kasia, stop fighting against it.", he whispered but she still pressed her hands against his chest. A sigh left his mouth. "Kasia, you cant deny you also want this. I know, you want to know how it would be." She shook her head but inside she knew he had a point.

His hands in her hair, his scent everywhere and his soft lips on her skin - she couldnt deny she felt excitement beside the fear. He took her face in his hands and forced her to look at him.

"Let me go on. Let me show you." Kasia bit her lips, unsure what to do. On the one hand he was such a cruel man, but on the other hand she couldnt resist him. She didnt know how to handle those feelings.

"Kasia." His deep voice was filled with impatience as he said her name. She wasnt able to answer him properly, so she just took her hands off his chest and put them on his shoulders.

Immediately Hoseok lifted her up. He grabbed her thighs and pushed her back against the wall. Kasia drew a sharp breath as he began to leave kisses on her neck. She had never felt that way before.

"Hold on tight." he commanded, carrying her over to the king size bed. Without another word he put her down and leaned over her. Under him, Kasia's breathing was hard. Led by an inner fire Hoseok pressed against Kasia, slowly opened the buttons on her dress and caressed her skin.

After all the fabric was gone, he ran his fingers over her waist. Kasia entirely concentrated on the feeling of being touched by him. A deep growl escaped his throat as she began pulling at his shirt. "Soon."

"Hoseok.", Kasia whimpered, suddenly seized by a lust that frightened her. The man above her could not hide a grin. He was pleased to be able to release such feelings in Kasia and he would enjoy it for a while before he gave her what she wanted. "Spread your legs apart." he urged instead. She did as she was told.

Hoseok's fingers wandered up her legs, caressing her thighs, then stopped right before touching her most vulnerable point to tease her a little bit. Kasia bit her lower lip. She wanted him so badly.

She readily obeyed when Hoseok told her to sit up so he could take off her dress. This annoying piece of cloth only stopped him from looking at her in full beauty. When she lay there, beautiful, completely naked and ready, a strange feeling of power came over him.

But not as he usually felt when he condemned or punished people. It was different. He had power over her, but he did not want to use it to hurt her. Instead, he wanted to satisfy her. And he would.

"Tell me what you want, Kasia." he whispered before kissing her ear, then her cheek and down her neck. She swallowed before answering. Her voice was low and her breathing slowed.

"I want you." It did not need more. Hoseok unbuttoned his shirt and dropped it carelessly to the ground. His pants followed. Shortly thereafter, he found himself in a wild kiss with her again.

There was nothing left of fear or timidity in her kiss. Pure passion had taken possession of them both. Hoseok controlled the situation. He set the pace and took what Kasia readily gave him.

Satisfied, he groaned in the kiss before gently nibbling on her lower lip. Kasia's hands, which until then had clawed at the bed sheet, now moved his body up and down. She caressed his chest and admired his pronounced muscles.

He was trained and strong and Kasia loved it. She touched every spot she could reach while Hoseok gasped with relish. After giving her enough time to explore his body, he grabbed her hands and squeezed them on the bed next to her head.

For a brief moment they looked into each other's eyes and the tension between them was palpable. Hoseok broke eye contact. Instead, he began to caress her breasts, which elicited her first soft moan.

He wanted to hear so much more of her groaning. Yes, he even wanted to make her scream. Without warning, he let his hand down and continued where he had left off earlier.

He stroked her middle and Kasia groaned in surprise. She felt hot and cold at the same time as the tension in her abdomen increased. Hoseok smiled at the sight that presented itself to him.

He stroked and teased her clit with his fingers and she moaned even louder. "Give me more, Kasia." He observed every of her moves. How she licked her lips and lifted her hips towards him. She arched her back and groaned as he shoved a finger into her core.

"You're so wet and ready for me." The edge of his lips puckered to a smirk. He speeded up the movements on her clit and thrusted into her roughly. His actions caused her to moan loudly and she tried to find hold by grabbing his shoulders.

"Hoseok. Please.", He felt her climax building up, so he stopped abruptly. "You're not gonna cum until I tell you." , he said dominantly, then he positioned himself between her legs. Before she could respond he thrusted into her.

He waited a moment, so she could get used to his length. She was so tight. Kasia hold her breath. Feeling his full erection was so much better than his fingers. Gently Hoseok started to thrust into her core while breathing strongly. This was so good, he had never felt better before.

"Hoseok.", she moaned passionately. She grabbed him by the waist and tried to show him that she wanted more. She needed more. Hoseok gave her what she wanted.

He increased the rhythm until he relentlessly pushed into her. "Who is it that makes you feel good?" "You." she groaned. "Say it louder. Say my name.", Hoseok demanded as he thrusted hard and deep into her. Kasia barely lasted it. She was overrun by her feelings and the desire increased immeasurably.

"Hoseok!" she yelled. She moaned his name continuously. Both are near their climax. "Look at me Kasia." She opened her eyes, which she had closed until then, and looked at him.

A deep feeling took possession of Hoseok as he saw her lying down and looking up to him. With their eyes crossed, he thrusted hard into her a few more times until they both reached their climax. "Yes, come for me princess.", Hoseok screamed.

Kasia threw her head back and rode out her orgasm. Both were completely out of breath as Hoseok let his body fall on hers. He chuckled and kissed her cheek softly.

Kasia crawled into his arm and listened to his heartbeat for a while while the fireplace crackled softly. The two of them enjoyed the beautiful feeling of skin on skin before hoseok decided to sit up. Kasia followed his act and kept her body covered with his silk blanket.

"Princess we should talk about ... what happened." he said cautiously, waiting for a reaction. The thought made her feel sick again, but she pulled herself together.

She nodded and waited for what he had to say. "I want to explain to you why I am like that, why I became a monster." Kasia immediately shook her head and felt bad that she had ever said those Words out loud.

"You're not a monster, I never should have said that, but I was scared. This situation was just too much for me, I'm sorry." she said, leaning over to lay her lips apologetically on his.

"No, you were right, what I've done all these years, what I'm still doing ... I'm starting to see that it's wrong, but I never knew it otherwise.", he began to talk about his past.

"When I was very young, my father was the king of this land, but my uncle was obsessed with climbing the throne and having all the power my father owned. He killed his own brother and became the new king. He quickly got his wife pregnant who gave birth to a son at first try. He wanted to have a legitimate heir so I wouldn't be his successor.", he explained and kasia saw that this weighed heavily on him.

"I was too young to understand what was going on and nobody told me, but my grandfather did not like the idea that my cousin would become the future king. When I was old enough, he told me what my uncle had done. He urged me to take revenge and I began to befriend the idea.

I was incredibly angry and hurt, he had taken my father from me, killed his own brother. These feelings accumulated until I finally reached for the knife and murdered my uncle and my cousin the same night.

Soaked in blood, I stood in front of my grandfather who gave me a sure smile. It was the first time he was really proud of me and showed it to me as well. He explained that I had to kill to own power and in order to live a happy life."

Kasia looked at him compassionately, it was like she was feeling his pain and confusion in this situation. She grabbed his hand to show her support as he paused.

"Something happened in my head that night, I learned that killing makes me happy, that I need it to be happy and to be powerful. Since then I've always enjoyed seeing people suffer because no one showed me to feel true joy in other ways besides my mother. Until I've met you."

He smiled at her with so much love that her cheeks turned into a bright red again. "The night I killed this man was to protect you. I wanted you to be safe and to let him suffer for what he did and wanted to do to you. I thought you would be proud of me because my grandfather was. It was a gesture of my affection towards you. I would never purposely hurt you."

She nodded, still trying to process what he told her. But she already made a decision. "I will show you how to feel good without killing. From now on I'm by your side Hoseok, you are not alone anymore. I will stay with you as long as you want me to."

"How about forever?"

__________

"This is crazy, this is crazy, this is crazy.", Kasia repeated over and over again, watching herself in the mirror. Elly stood beside her, admiring how beautiful she looked today. "Wow, Kasia you look stunning. He will love it.", she said smiling softly and wiping away a single tear of joy for her friend.

"I can't believe that this is happening.", Kasia whispered. "What do you mean? That you look goddamn beautiful in this wedding dress or that you are just minutes away from being our future queen?", Elly teased her.

"Oh my god Elly, I'm gonna marry him in a few minutes." Kasia honestly didn't care much about becoming the queen but her heart stopped for a second every time she realized that she will become the wife of the love of her life. "I'm so happy for you, you can't imagine."

Elly and some other woman helped Kasia walking to the great hall where all the guests and her beloved Hoseok were already waiting impatiently. When he put his eyes on her beautiful sight, he forgot to breathe. She walked towards him with a big smile as the guests rose, now all eyes were on her.

He smiled back and could barely believe his luck. When she arrived, he took her hands in his and they listened to the pastor's speech. After that, it was time for the marriage vow.

"Kasia, I promise to honor and love you forever, you are my queen and the love of my life, I will do everything I can to make you happy forever." he said and moved her to tears.

"Hoseok, I promise to honor and love you forever for the great man you are. I will always stay by your side. I will go through the darkest of times with you and will always cherish the beautiful moments you gift me with. I can not wait to spend my eternity with you."

They handed each other the rings they would wear for the rest of their lifes and were officially declared husband and wife. Hoseok kissed her deeply while everyone cheerfully applauded.

She kissed his cheek as he grabbed her hip and pulled her into his arm. It was followed by a beautiful celebration and everyone danced happily.

Kasia and Hoseok knew they had found their perfect match and would be together forever. Their spirits harmonized perfectly with each other and made them the greatest rulers this land had ever seen.

[echotrinityme]

You will be loved Chapter 17: Love The Way You Lie(Bad Ending)

Charles glared at Dominic and he grinded his teeth in anger, he kept his gun trained on Dom. He wanted to shoot Dom but how is he going to do it without hurting Henry in the process.

"Let. Him. Go." demanded Charles, he was pissed off as hell.

"Why would I? I'm his lover." jeered Dominic, he tightened his grip on Henry making him whine in pain.

"No, you are not!" shouted Charles, he was getting more angry by the second.

"Oh yeah says who."

" You don't deserve him! Not after all the bullshit you put him through! shrieked Charles.

"You treat him like a slave, you hurt him, you say stuff that lower his self esteem, and you made him hurt himself to the point of attempted suicide!" bellowed Charles.

Dominic didn't reply right away, he just stand there not moving. Henry was still quietly sobbing and trembling like he was cold, Charles needed a plan and fast.

"Your point will be?" answered Dominic, nonchalantly.

"Aaugh! You're insufferable! The point is that you are the biggest douche on the planet!" shouted Charles, it was like talking to a wall.

"Why thank you, that's the nicest thing you've said to me."

Dominic was actually smiling when he said that, he actually chirped in response because of it. He looked like a cat that just ate the canary, Charles wanted to punch the grin off his face.

"Look, I don't know who the fuck do you think you are but you don't treat the person you love like trash."

"Oh please, you're the last person to know about a relationship considering what happened between you and the idiot twin call Calvin."

Charles instantly froze from shock and anger but didn't show it, he was right but at least Calvin didn't hurt him or made him hurtful himself. He just manipulated him...admittedly that hurt no matter what.

"Yeah...well at least he treated me decently, he wasn't hurting me!" argued Charles, his voice wavered in sadness.

"Even though he lied to you about Henry." hissed Dominic, acidly.

Henry was watching the scene with confusion and shock on his face, Calvin manipulated Charles into a relationship? Why? How come he just heard of this now?

Charles didn't reply, he knew Dominic was tormenting him. Trying to get a rise out of him, he won't let him have it. Charles gave Dominic a glare to show defiance.

Henry was trying to figure it a way to distract Dom so Charles can help him, as he was thinking of a plan the door open again and everyone turned to see Rupert, Ellie, and Dave standing there with their guns pointed towards Dominic.

"Ok, this is getting old." said Dominic, he was about to head towards the exit until Rupert stepped in front of him, blocking his escape.

"Hold it right there, asshole." growled Rupert.

"Let him go!" exclaimed Ellie, Dave kept his gun and gaze on Dominic to make sure he doesn't move.

"Oh how sweet, I didn't realize you have so many friends to come save you, Henry." spat Dominic, sarcastically.

Henry didn't retort, his expression was blank. He thought no one cared about him but looks like someone does, he hoped Dominic doesn't hurt or kill them...that seems unlikely.

Rupert stepped forward to Dominic to put his gun on his chest, he was angry and annoyed at Dom's behavior. He grabbed Dominic's shirt and stared at him with malice.

"Let Henry go you arrogant, selfish, son of a pig or I'll blow your brains out." snarled Rupert.

"Ok." said Dominic, calmly. Which startled everyone, he was acting calm, too calm.

Dominic let go of Henry who was waiting for something to happen, everyone thought Dominic was acting strange. They all held their breaths while Rupert motioned Henry to come towards him.

Henry did as he was told, without hesitation. Charles was keeping an eye on Dominic to make sure he's not gonna hurt Henry or anyone in the room, they all prayed that Dominic would keep being calm and settle the situation with amicable terms.

He didn't.

In a flash, he pulled the trigger and shot Henry. Charles screamed in despair while Rupert and Dave shot towards Dominic to fight him.

Henry fell onto the floor, his stomach was bleeding. Henry kept his hand on the wound while Charles rushed to his side, Ellie followed him and she ripped a sleeve to stop the wound from bleeding.

"Hen! Oh God Henry!" shouted Charles, he was crying hysterically.

Ellie kept the rag on the wound but she was also crying, they both did their best to help Henry with his wound. Meanwhile, Rupert and Dave were struggling with Dominic, he was stronger than them and he was scrambling for the gun which he dropped.

"You bastard!" bellowed Rupert.

Dominic shoved Dave and he landed on the floor, he stared up Dom who was still struggling. He stand up and had a determined look on his face, "Ok, Dave you got this." he said to himself.

He snatched the gun that Dom was reaching for and he threw to the side, he got out his own gun and aimed at him. He was about to pull the trigger until a bullet whizzed by him into Dominic's head, killing him instantly.

Rupert let go of the corpse and saw that the Bukowski twins were there, Calvin was holding the pistol and it was aiming at Dom. He pulled the trigger to kill him and Konrad was shaking while he was holding his gun at Dom.

"Uh...good teamwork." said Dave, awkwardly.

"Come on, Henry stay with us." exclaimed Charles, his voice cracking and making everyone rushed towards them.

By now, Henry coughed up blood. There was blood everywhere, Rupert checked his pulse. It was getting weaker and his body getting more cold by the minute.

"S-Stop." croaked Henry, which made everyone stop for a moment.

"B-But Henry, you need help!" wailed Charles, Ellie nodded vigorously so did Dave while Rupert witness the scene with indifference.

Rupert knows that Henry was not going to make it and so did Henry.

"There's something I have to tell you and can you promise me this?" said Henry, his voice wavered and he coughed up more blood.

"I love you Charles and please be happy."

"I love you too Hen...I will."

When Charles said that, his voice cracked and he was sobbing loudly.

"Please Henry, don't leave me." pleaded Charles.

Henry was starting to loose consciousness, he began to close his eyes. His left hand that was holding Charles' hand went lip and his breathing slow to a stop, he moved no more.

Everyone watched in horror as Henry didn't move, they waited for a movement, for a sound but nothing. Charles shook Henry to get up but that didn't work either, he was dead.

"It's too late Charles, he's dead." said Rupert, softly but he was sobbing.

"No...he can't be" choked Charles.

"He just can't."

Rupert shook his head in sadness and he went to comfort him, Ellie was crying while Dave was holding her. Konrad and Calvin watched the scene and they also began to sob, Calvin was feeling immense guilt and sadness.

He made Charles lose Henry forever, Charles is never ever gonna forgive him and he deserved hatred from him.

Charles picked up Henry's body bridle style and without another word he walked out, the floor had a huge blood stain reminding them on what happened with Henry.

Charles walked over to the base still holding Henry's corpse, as got into the entrance of the base everyone was talking and gossiping with each other until they saw Charles carrying Henry's body.

Everyone stared at them with shock and confusion on their faces, however they all stand aside for Charles. Their faces became solemn and bowed their heads in sign of respect, they also took off their hats too.

The General was outside the tent talking to Terrance and Randy until a random soldier ran up to him, the General was about to ask what's going on when the soldier interrupted him.

"Sir, I think you should come see this." said the Soldier, his tone serious.

Galeforce raised an eyebrow and he beckoned the soldier to lead the way, he and Henry's dads followed the soldier hastily.

Victoria was trying to find Ellie when she saw a group formed into a circle, she went to the circle and was about to tell them off until she saw Charles carrying a body...Henry's body.

She gasped softly but before she can say anything, there was a large wail coming from the other direction. She turned to find the source when she saw Terrance on the ground, he was crying hysterically and Randy comforted him but he was also crying.

Galeforce sighed in mourning, he never expected to come like this. He went up to Charles and he silently took Henry's corpse away from Charles and he walked towards the two weeping men.

Charles' clothes was wet and a deep crimson, his face was blank, emotionless. He hadn't shown sign of movement, he just stood there motionless.

The others soon catches up with Charles and Rupert shook him by the shoulders but no response, Ellie tried to shake him harder but no budge.

"C'mon Charles, say something." pleaded Ellie.

"Oi! Charles, speak to us!"

"Charles! Charles!"

Rupert and Dave shouted at Charles but he didn't hear any of it, the voices sounded as if they were underwater to him.

Charles' whole body went cold and his heart was numb, he didn't realize that everyone was trying to get his attention until he felt a really hard punch into his face.

Out of no where, Terrance punched Charles and it made Charles snapped back into reality, he fell on the ground  with a thud.

"Wha?" said Charles, finally speaking but his voice choked.

"You promise to protect him!" shrieked Terrance, his voice wavered and his eyes were red and glossy.

Randy had to hold him back and Rupert helped Charles up, he glared at Terrance but Charles stared at him with sadness and shame.

"Because of you! He's dead!"

"Terry, please calm down."

Randy hugged Terrance as he cried into his husband's chest, Charles couldn't blame him, he did fail to protect Henry.

His vision blurred and he felt hot liquid streaming down his cheeks, he finally started to sob. He ran to his helicopter, ignoring anyone calling him.

He got into his helicopter and went to a designated spot he brought Henry, the cliff was in sight and he landed. He walked to the cliffside and he admired the scenery with sorrow.

He sighed and his tears are now dried, he stared out at the sunset in awe. He gave himself a small sad smile, he now feels more alone than ever.

His life will be full of emptiness, Henry told him to be happy but how could he be happy without Henry?

He wouldn't be...

[eleanorbloom]

[OH] When You’re Ready Ch. 03

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything of the Open Heart World. The name Eleanor Bloom and her story was created by me, though.

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x f! MC (Eleanor Bloom) x Ethan Ramsey.

Word Count: 4.8k

Warning: Angst, adult language, and smut. 

Summary: Bryce has decided to let go of Eleanor because she’s in love with Ethan Ramsey. But a turn in her relationship with the attending might change Bryce's plans.

A/N: Thank you so much for all your kind words and your support. 

I have the urge to remind you all that English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistakes. As a perfectionist, I’ve been having a hard time trying to make this fic the more comprehensible as it can be.  I know my English doesn’t suck, that your people understand what I write (lol) but I’m sure there are some idioms or, I don’t know, the order of the words that may seem off, and I can't help but feel bad about it. Just know that this happens because I’m a Spanish speaker trying to write a fanfic in English.  

That’ll be all. Lots of love to my readers 

Let me know if you wanna be added to the taglist! :)

Taglist: @utterlyinevitable @binny1985 ​ @laiba-the-person ​ @choicesficwriterscreations @shanzay44

______

Chapter Three: All I Ask.

It matters how this ends

‘Cause what if I never love again? 

Eleanor walked into the locker room feeling her heart in her throat, a knot threatening to make her explode with rage and bitterness once again. When she reached for her locker, she found Sienna already fully dressed to leave Edenbrook.

“Oh my god, Ellie, are you okay?!” Sienna inquired as she perceived the mortified expression on her face.

“I’m not”

“What happened? Did you… Did you speak with Dr. Ramsey?”

“I did”

“And?”

Eleanor couldn’t help but let a few tears stream down her face, but she managed to avoid the sob.

“He’s going to the Amazon with the WHO”

“What?! Oh my god, that’s big”

"And he’s leaving tomorrow”

“Oh no. Ellie, I’m so sorry ”

Suddenly, all traces of sadness and rage disappeared from her. She wiped the tears off her face and cleared her throat.

“Don’t be. Let’s get outta here, I need a drink”

"Okay, I’ll text the others to meet at Donahue’s”

Sienna eyed Eleanor with concern. She wanted to tell her to stop suppressing her feelings, to stop pretending she didn’t care, but she preferred to keep it quiet, hoping that at some point she would explode and let everything out. Because she had spent all those weeks pretending that she didn’t care, that it didn’t hurt to ignore Ramsey, that it didn’t hurt that he didn’t care that she was ignoring him. Nearly five months of pent-up emotions.

 An hour later, Eleanor was at Donahue’s with Bryce and her new best friend, the vodka. Elijah was with Phoebe choosing a few songs on the jukebox to dance to; Sienna was with Danny and other nurses playing darts and Jackie and Rafael were deep in conversation at the bar. Bryce had noticed her mood but didn’t want to ask her directly, since he guessed who was responsible. Instead, he preferred to join her to drink, without judging that she was almost drinking the entire bottle of vodka by herself without any coyness, although he was willing to make her stop when it became dangerous for her health.

Suddenly, Eleanor’s face sparkled with fury. Bryce turned to check the source of her discomfort, knowing perfectly well who it was. Ethan was at the bar talking to Reggie as he took a seat.

“You’re so predictable, Ethan Ramsey"—She muttered as she took the shot of vodka in one sip—"I bet he’ll have a couple of shots, waiting for the moment when I’m alone, and if doesn’t find me alone he’ll just switch to some non-alcohol drink because he will have to wait for me until I decide to go home. All that wait just to cry apologies for something he didn’t want to say, but said anyway”

Bryce smirked as he heard her rant.

"Do you want me to leave you alone so you can talk to him?”

“No! No, please, I don’t want to make it that easy for him. I want to see what he’s capable of. If he’s just going to be a shitty wary that’s going to expect to find me alone, or if he’s able to get right up to me. Please don’t leave me alone, Bryce.

“Don’t worry, Elle, I won’t leave you alone if that’s what you want”

“Thank you, Bryce. You are the best”

“I know I am. Cheers for that”

They clanged their glasses and took another shot.

“Why are you so mad, by the way?”

Eleanor told him their talk with the details that only a drunk and upset person can do it.

“So, he’s leaving then? And he didn’t even tell you?”

“No. He didn’t want to tell me”

“Oof, what a douche. Hun, why do you let him treat you like this?”

“I don't know. I don’t know why I have allowed this torment for so long. But I got tired. I don’t care anymore. If he stays, if he goes. I don’t know why should I care when he has never cared for how bad I’ve been all this time”

Bryce looked at her with a sad expression. He hated to see Eleanor that way. Crying, hopeless. Suffering. He took her hand tenderly.

“Eleanor, I’m so sorry”—He said, caressing the back of her hand—“You don’t deserve anything you’re going through. It’s okay to be angry, you can’t allow him to treat you like that”

“I know”—She replied in a tiny voice.

“And you can’t keep wasting your time with someone who doesn’t value you, Elle. He may love you, but if he really valued you, he wouldn’t treat you like that. He wouldn’t let you suffer like that” 

Bryce stroked her cheek, looking right into her tear-filled eyes.

“You’re right, Bryce"—She stared right into his eyes without looking away, then wiped her tears with the back of her hand.

“You deserve the world, Eleanor”

She couldn’t help but give him a big smile as her cheeks flushed.

Then she turned her gaze to the bar and realized that Ethan was with a tense posture making glances toward their table.  Seeing Eleanor cry and be comforted by Bryce surely challenged his nerves more than he was willing to admit.

About fifteen minutes later, her friends began to return to the table to start the Karaoke session. They had fun with some of their favorite songs and other classics requested by other clients. Then was Eleanor’s turn to sing a song. She felt a twist on her stomach.

“Eleanor, it’s your turn, what did you request?”

“All I Ask”—She replied to Elijah, simply.

Everyone at the table stared at her.

"Eleanor…"—Bryce whispered—"Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes. I’m done hiding my feelings, pretending he didn’t hurt me just to make him feel the less uncomfortable”

The melody began to play, and Eleanor already felt her heart shatter without even having started the first line. Her friends stared at her for a few moments and then looked away at the awkward situation that was coming. 

“I will leave my heart at the door

I won’t say a word

They’ve all been said before, you know”

Eleanor was heartbroken and drunk, and practically putting on a show in front of all Donahue’s, but deep down her friends knew that that was what Eleanor needed right now, to release all her feelings in front of Ethan, though not directly. Because Eleanor had been holding back all these months, resisting love, the desire to be with Ethan, resisting the urge to stand in his office or his home and ask him once again to stop pushing her away and to be together once and for all, more times than she had already done. She had swallowed the love, the pride, the pain in inhuman ways. But what had happened today was the culmination of too many repressed feelings, and if her way of finding catharsis was through the saddest, cheesiest, and most heartbreaking song Adele had ever written, then so be it.

“So why don’t we just play pretend

Like we’re not scared of what is coming next

Or scared of having nothing left”

Eleanor took all the courage she had and turned her gaze to Ethan, who was staring at her with the most mortifying look she had ever seen on him, and she had seen plenty: When Dolores passed away, when he found out Banerji had a month to live. He was not holding anything, the pain, the guilt, the embarrassment.

“Look, don't get me wrong 

I know there is no tomorrow

All I ask is

If this is my last night with you

Hold me like I’m more than just a friend

Give me a memory I can use

Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do

It matters how this ends

‘Cause what if I never love again?”

At least Eleanor had a very good voice to sing the songs of Adele, so she wasn’t embarrassing herself too badly. Of course, she was not as good as Adele herself but made a few good notes, and the alcohol had given her too much courage to go for the high pitches, and the anger gave her too much feeling to sing with such a passion, that she astonished to all her friends. She was actually killing it.

-"I don’t need your honesty

It’s already in your eyes

And I’m sure my eyes, they speak for me

No one knows me like you do

Eleanor looked directly at Ethan again.

And since you’re the only one that mattered

Tell me who do I run to?"

The words came out with such rage from her core, that Ethan felt as if she had said it a few inches from him, and not indirectly through a song and standing several feet away from him. And he felt every one of her words, every look, every drop of anger and sadness. He acknowledged receipt of all this and accepted his responsibility. He felt broken at the sight of her because he wanted to do so much to ease her pain. But he couldn’t.

After the song was over, Eleanor returned to her place with tears on her face but not one iota of embarrassment.

“Eleanor, that was truly beautiful”—Sienna said, tears on her face too—"Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m feeling better, I think it took a lot of weight off my shoulders”

“That is the important thing”

“You were very brave”—Bryce said caressing her back.

“Guys, I just ridiculed myself in front of the whole bar and you guys are treating me like I’ve won a war”

“You did something for yourself that you should have done months ago. Show how you really feel”—Sienna replied, serious.

“Well…”

“We are proud of you, Eleanor”— Elijah added.

“It’s about damn time you take care of yourself and don’t let Ramsey do whatever the fuck he wants”—Continued Jackie.

“Even if that means to sing a sad song in front of him”—Concluded Sienna.

After that, Eleanor was in a better mood and managed to distract herself from all she had been through that day. However, the presence of Ethan, sitting there at the bar, probably waiting for her, was a latent nuisance in her stomach.

A few hours later, Eleanor and her friends decided to go home. The moment she passed by his side, Ethan got up from his seat and walked towards her.

“Rookie”.

His disposition had changed from hell to heaven. She was no longer Dr. Bloom. She was Rookie again.

“What is it, Dr. Ramsey?”

Ethan looked at her sadly at the coldness in her response.

“Can we talk?”

Eleanor looked away to the floor, anger washing over her again. Then she looked back at him, who was waiting for her answer with pleading eyes.

“About what? I’m going home”

“I know … I-“

“I’ve been here the last four hours, I’m sure you could’ve looked for me in all this time… But obviously you waited for me to want to go home to do it?”

Ethan knew she was berating him. She shook her head.

“I was hoping you weren’t such a coward and would look for me directly. But you behave like a shy teenager who has never spoken to a woman in his life”

“Eleanor, are you coming?”—Jackie asked.

Her friends were at the door, first-hand witnesses of her exchange with Ethan.

“No, I stay. Don’t worry about me”

Eleanor looked at Ramsey coldly. They took a seat in the back of the bar so no one could hear them.

“So? I thought we were done”—She broke the silence between them.

“No, we are not done, Eleanor”

Ethan lowed her head, pondering his words.

“If… If I didn’t tell you about my trip to the Amazon, was because I wanted to make things less difficult for us. The last time we spoke I made myself clear that we can’t be together not because I don’t want to, but because we can’t. And when I noticed you started to avoid me, I thought maybe you finally understood my point, and I was okay with that”

“Then why you threw all over my face that I was ignoring you, like you weren’t okay with that?”

“Because I realized that you didn’t do it because you understood my point. You did it to piss me off. To return the favor. As vengeance. So, if you did actually ignore me with that motive in mind, you didn’t have the right to reclaim something from me”

“I…”—Her cheeks turned red.

“That’s not the point now, Eleanor”—He interrupted—"What I’m trying to say is… You can’t stop saying that everything I’ve done it’s because I want it, that I’m responsible of all your misery. But let me be clear. I don’t want it, Eleanor. I don’t want to be apart from you, I don’t want to ignore you. I’ve never wanted to spend the last five months ignoring your existence, not be able to talk to you, not to even look at you”

Eleanor observed his features, tracing all sense of honesty and determination. She knew he wasn’t lying or playing the victim.

“I’m not comfortable with this”—He continued—"I’m not okay with that but if that’s what allows me to be away from you to not interfere in your career, I’m willing to do that and more. I know it’s painful for you, that it’s not the best option for both of us. But this is the only way I can cope up with the situation”

“The only way… Ethan, are you sure not talking to me, not even looking at me the is the only option?”

“To me, it is”—He responded categorically—Eleanor, what I want is to be with you. If I could, I would’ve never let you leave my bed the first time we made love, or I would’ve never get up from your bed the last time we were together. If I could, I would live in that dream all my life. But I can’t”

Tears started to stream down her face. Again. His words broke her in million pieces. Because she couldn’t stop reliving those nights in all these months. Now she was realizing Ethan couldn’t either.

“I need you to understand that I’ve never wanted to hurt you. If my actions have hurt you, I’m sorry, but I mean it when I say I’ve never wanted anything of this to happen. I would love to make you happy in the ways you want. Believe me. But you have fought so hard to be here, Eleanor. Years to get to be at Edenbrook. Years and especially difficult months to get the Junior Fellow position. I can’t let you jeopardize your career nor your reputation”

Eleanor was speechless. She felt dumb, like a stupid teenager that let herself go on emotions and never thought through the real meaning of all his actions. She still felt a little pissed off, because there were still a lot of things Ethan should have avoided telling her and that were mean. But everything else he had done was… reasonable. Fair. Thoughtful.

“Ethan… I’m sorry for yelling at you like that. I feel embarrassed about how childish I was today”

“No, Eleanor. I still believe that you have every right to be mad at me because I didn’t tell you I would be out. I always knew I should’ve told you, but I was afraid. I’m a coward as you said. I didn’t want to face this conversation. Your pain. But you deserved more”

Eleanor nod.

“Well, yeah. You should’ve told me. But I made an outburst. I didn’t want to listen to you, I was being stubborn just to get what I want, but maybe I’ve never really put myself in your shoes”

“That’s all I ask. To understand why I’m doing this from my point of view”

Suddenly, Reggie approaches.

“Ethan, I’m sorry, but we are about to close”

“Thank you, Reggie”

Eleanor grabbed her purse and walked to the door followed by Ethan.

Eleanor turned to him.

“I believe you when you tell me you’ve never wanted to hurt me by staying away from me. But there have been plenty of times when you have hurt me by behaving like a dick to me, unnecessarily. Because one thing is avoiding to talk to me, but you have ignored me, you have been cruel, you have looked at me like you hate me”

“Yes. I know. I hope you can forgive me one day”

“I could forgive you, but I’ll only do it when I feel assured that you won’t do it again and I think there’s not enough time for that now”

Ethan stared without saying a word. He knew he couldn’t promise her that. He knew himself.

“Well, I think you can go in peace now that we have left everything clear, don’t we? Have a nice flight, I hope the mission is a success and you return safely. Bye”

Eleanor started to walk down the street to get a taxi.

“Why are you leaving like that? You’re not even going to say goodbye?”

“I said bye. That’s a goodbye. Or was it too informal? Goodbye Dr. Ramsey. There you have”

Ethan took her arm, forcing her to look into his eyes. Hers were reddened, tired, anguished. Like she was holding a ton of pain on her mind.

“Eleanor…”

“What, Ethan, what?“—She answered as her voice was breaking. She didn’t want him to go. But she had to let him go. To let that goodbye lingering more than necessary would only do her more harm than it had already done her.

“Let me take you home”

No. She would lose her mind if she let that happen. But she wanted it so bad.

“You were drinking”

“I drank whiskey when I arrived, after that, just lemonade, because I figured I’d have to wait until the end of the night to talk to you”

She wanted so bad to be with him as much time as possible. But she was trying to respect Ethan's intentions. But… He was leaving tomorrow. That was the last time she would see him in god knows how much time.

“Okay, let's go”—She agreed.

They walked silently back to the hospital, where Ethan had his car parked. The journey was silent. Ethan didn’t even dare to turn on the radio. They were only accompanied by the noise of the engine and other vehicles traveling through the streets of Boston at 3 am.

Eleanor wanted to say so many things, but it would make everything worse. So she lost herself in the smell of his car. Every time she sensed that smell on someone’s car o in any place, it reminded her of him. 

She had always had a particularly olfactory memory, and although most of the time it brought her good memories of her childhood or adolescence, in terms of relationships it always brought her bittersweet memories, melancholy, regret. 

She knew that smell—The smell of Ethan’s car, a scent of pine and musk—, or his smell — a fresh citric scent—would only bring her pain.

Ethan parked outside the apartment. The street was lonely, no one could be seen in the distance, and the only sound was the murmur of cars passing by the main avenue. A lump wove in her throat. She was afraid.

Eleanor turned to him to say goodbye. She wanted to make it simple. She could swear that she wanted to make it simple. 

“Have a good trip, Ethan, I hope you get back safely”—She spoke softly as she hugged him.

"Thank you, Eleanor”

“Text me to know that you arrived safely, please”—Eleanor asked, looking straight into his eyes. Those sky-blue eyes that were always the beginning of all her madness.

Ethan caressed the nape of her neck with his thumb and then he closed his eyes while pressing his forehead into hers, trying to absorb all her presence, the silkiness of her hair, the sweet scent of her neck, the warmth of her skin, of her hands. Before Eleanor could pull away, he sighed:

“I hope one day you finally understand that everything I’ve done, everything I’m doing, is for you. Because it's never been about me, Eleanor. The only thing that matters to me is that you become the brilliant and successful doctor you really deserve to be”

There were so much sincerity and pain in his speech that Eleanor pulled away from him so she could see his eyes. She stroked his cheek.

“I know, in a way I understand it, Ethan… But I can’t accept that path has to be this painful… And so unfair”

“Life isn’t fair, Eleanor”

Eleanor wanted to refute him that in this case, life had nothing to do with it. Because life wasn’t being unfair to her. He was being unfair. But she was unable to say a word. She was mesmerized by Ethan’s look. His eyes that so many times had given her comfort, now they haunted her dreams, they didn’t let her sleep at night, and at that precise moment, was threatening the little sanity she had left. 

After a few moments, they began to look at their lips, mere inches away from each other, until they finally gave in to the inevitable. A brush of lips so satisfying and full of redemption that they sighed in unison, to come together again in a more intense kiss, capturing and biting each other lips. Ethan felt Eleanor’s tears stream down his cheeks. To alleviate her own pain and avoid a sob, Eleanor stroked Ethan’s hair tightly in the back of his head, intensifying the kiss even more, sliding her tongue in his, and all over his lips. 

Ethan didn’t have time to hesitate and was caught up by the same desire. Soon, he was sliding his hands under Eleanor’s coat, feeling the curve of her breasts, her waist, and her hips. It was a never-ending dance of lips, which was complemented by more caresses, and then Eleanor climbing on top of Ethan, straddling him with her legs.

On another occasion, she would have pulled herself together and walked away. But knowing that she wouldn’t see him again for a long time, it drove her crazy. And maybe not for a long time, but there was always the possibility that this would be the last time they would be together, that both of them would want each other. Because no one could foretell what would happen from now on, when both he and she had finally accepted that their relationship had reached a dead end and that it was up to Ethan to revive it, and he had been clear that that wouldn’t happen.

“Eleanor…”—He sighed, a glint of reluctancy in his tone. He gulped.

She ignored him and continued to kiss him passionately, as she began to move over Ethan’s lap gently. 

"Deny that you want this"—She whispered a moments later—"Say that you don’t want me and I swear I’ll go”

Eleanor pulled away from him and looked into his eyes. It was dark, but she was able to see the sparkle in his eyes slightly. Eleanor’s anticipation was stifling as she felt Ethan’s bulge between her tights.

“I want you more than anything in this world”—He replied melting at the sight of her on top of him, his arms around her body.

Without wasting another second, she kissed him again, intensifying her movements over him.

“Eleanor"—He gasped, feeling an electric shock down his spine as he rested his hand over Eleanor's hips, pressing her against his crotch, rubbing each other as their moans began to invade the car.

Suddenly, Eleanor slid her hand between his tights, feeling his arousal under her fingers. He went to her pants, unbuttoned them, and shoved his hand under her panties. He felt her wetness, her desire. She sighed.

“Ohh, Ethan…”

“You’re so ready”

“Yes” She mumbled.

Ethan tried to lower her pants, but he couldn’t do much, due to the uncomfortable position. For a second, Eleanor thought they could have gone to her room but abandoned the idea immediately. She knew that Ethan could have second thoughts on their way to her apartment and she didn’t want to risk the possibility to be with him. 

Instead, she returned to the passenger seat, took off her shoes, and after moving the seat backward, took off her pants and panties. Ethan imitated her and pushed the seat backward as well and began to unfasten his pants. Eleanor, anxious, unhooked his belt and pants before he could finish, and released his cock under the boxer, and lowered herself to slide her tongue in all his length, to finally cover the tip with his mouth and then go deep. After a few moments, she moved upwards, sucking him hard.

“Eleanor”—He sighed in pleasure.

The girl worked on him for a few moments, until Ethan stopped her and guided her to sit on his lap again. “Come here”

They kissed again, devouring each other, Ethan grazing her jaw, her neck greedily, while she was gasping loudly as the anticipation was taking her body, feeling his arousal right under her sex. Then he removed her sweater and pulled her shirt and bra up, exposing his breasts. He cupped them with both hands before taking his mouth straight to her chest and began to kiss them… and then to suck her nipples.

"Ethan” Eleanor moaned loudly “Yes!”

The sound of his breath while licking her nipples and the “smack” after his mouth sucked them resonated in the car, and it was just another source of pleasure for Eleanor. But there was still something both were missing. Eleanor shifted slightly as she directed his arousal towards her center.

“Fuck”—She sighed as Ethan was entering her.

It was a blessed feeling, although neither of them believed in God, least of all in religion. That pleasure, that ecstasy, was a catharsis after all those months containing their deepest feelings and desires, after reliving almost every night the precious time they had spent together and that now were long gone.

“Oh, I missed you"—He groaned, taking her butt harder, as he was picking up more speed.

“Fuck yes. I wanted you so bad”—She kissed him, tongues colliding, teeth biting and swollen lips asking for more and more.

“You feel amazing, Eleanor”

The noise of their bodies colliding filled the car, but they were soon muffled with the moans that each one was not able to suppress, in the face of the sensations that were overwhelming them.

If someone was passing by and they had caught them, they wouldn’t have cared. All that mattered at that moment, was the feeling of their bodies connected. The pleasure that one was producing in the other. The ecstasy, the madness of their touch. The smell of their bodies. Ethan went to her breasts taking one with her hand, sucking her nipples hard while the other hand was on her ass, gripping her roughly.

“Ethan, I’m close”

Ethan was holding back just to this moment. He grabbed her firmly by her hips and began to thrust her at an impossible pace. Eleanor couldn’t comprehend where all that sensations were coming from, how she started to melting so abruptly, because she climaxed just a few seconds later.

“Oh my god, ETHAN!”—She screamed as he felt her hot breath in his mouth. Her tights squeezed as she was climaxing and that was enough to make him cum crying out her name.

He saw Eleanor toppling over him resting her forehead into his. Ethan embraced her, trying to feel every inch of her exposed skin in his.

“I love you”—She whispered.

He tightened his embrace, just as he did the last time she had said those words, and Eleanor still couldn’t figure out if he did that to pent up and not say anything, or to catch some bravery to tell her something. Either way, she wasn’t waiting for an answer this time. She only wanted him to know, before leaving, that she still loved him.

After a few more seconds holding each other, Eleanor returned to the passenger seat. She took her clothes and began to put them on. He also fixed his clothes. Somehow, when she came back to reality, the atmosphere was just as tense and painful as before the kiss. Even though the orgasm was still latent between her tights, the fact of knowing that the goodbye had finally come, was shattering her.

She turned to him, look into his blue eyes for a brief second, and breathed:

“Have a good flight ”

And without further ado, she got out of the car towards the building. 

“I love you too, Eleanor”—He said just as Eleanor closed the building’s door.

 _____

Chapter 4.

[thephantomcasebook]

Matt’s “Reasonable” Downton Abbey Movie Sequel Pitch

Since I’ve been known to take extreme flights of fancy ... maybe wedding Downton Abbey continuity to Pulp and Classic Adventure stories in the past ... this time I’m gonna pitch something that is plausible on the Silver Screen.

The Summery:

Set in the Mid-1950′s. Lady Mary Talbot hosts a house party at Downton Abbey, like the old days, before the war. However - during the party - a maid is found dead. Miles from competent investigators, Edward Pelham enlists the help of his childhood hero and older cousin, the Earl of Grantham, George Crawley. Once a famed adventurer and war hero - no one has seen or heard from him since the war ended. He has chosen solitude and exile in the seclusion of Crawley House with his young son and his faithful butler Thomas Barrow. 

Together, with the help of old friends, the two cousins try to unveil the murderer that is on the loose in Downton Abbey looking to avenge an old sin from the past. 

PRINCIPLE RETURNING CAST: 

 Lady Mary, Lady Edith, and Tom Branson -  Michelle Dockery, Laura Carmichael, and Allen Leech 

Lady Rose Aldridge, “Dowager Countess of Sinderby” - Lily James 

Mrs. Lucy Branson - Tuppence Middleton 

Anna Bates - Joanne Froggett  

Thomas Barrow & Richard Ellis - Richard Collier & Max Brown

NEW PRINCIPLE CAST

Captain George “The Comet” Crawley, Earl of Grantham - Henry Cavil  

Crippled during battle while Storming an SS held Austrian Castle in May 1945, George Crawley chose seclusion rather than Downton Abbey. For the last ten years he has retreated from the world. Surrounded by Libraries of ancient texts and Medieval Chronicles - glass cases filled with trophies and artifacts from his adventures -  George broods darkly over the death of his men and a betrayal by the one he loved most in Matthew Crawley’s old chair by the fire..  

However, his young idealistic cousin rouses the once heroic and valiant adventurer back to action with the encouragement of his son Jason Crawley and Thomas Barrow, who believe George has sat idle too long and must become the leader and man of action he once was.

“Well, well, well ... if it isn’t Captain George “The Comet” Crawley himself. The most Dangerous Man in the whole Empire, this one was ... Once. 

“Yes, I dare say, and how are you holding up these days, eh, Old Boy?!” 

“With a cane.” 

Ms. Sybil “Sybbie” Branson - Jessica De Gouw  

A Genius Mechanical Engineer, Sybbie was once the partner and companion of George Crawley on many adventure and stayed by his side throughout the war. However in 1943, during a mission with their SOE Commando Team in Greece, Sybbie Branson turned coat on the Allies and  was revealed to be a Nazi Agent ... Her betrayal caused the unintended death of John “Johnny” Bates Jr. 

Captured in Austrian Castle in May of 1945 at great cost in George’s blood and the lives of his men by her fanatical suitor and body guards, Sybbie was tried at Nuremberg for helping design super weapons for the Nazis. However, just before her execution, at the last moment, she was reprieved and recruited by “Operation Paper Clip” ... some believed sparing her life was the last thing George did before going into seclusion.

Ten years later, Ms. Sybil Darcy splits her time in Hollywood as an Oscar winning actress and a Southern California Military Base where she helps develop rockets for a fledgling American Space Program. It is only by chance that on another guilt ridden drinking binge that she awakens at the doors of Downton Abbey - her childhood home - where her International Playboy fiance was invited to Lady Mary’s House Party.

“When I’m in his arms all I can think of is home, and when I think of home all I can think of is you. I know what I’ve done is evil and can never be forgiven. And I don’t ask for it from you ... all I ask is that you wait for me ... please, don’t leave me here alone. I don’t remember what this world was like without you in it, And all I know is that I cannot live in such a world. I know you don’t want to hear it, but I love you, and I’ll never stop ... Never.”

Lady Marigold Fraser, “Countess of Tarahill” - Elizabeth Henstridge 

During the “Battle of Britain” and “The Blitz” Corporal Marigold Crawley served as a operator and airwoman in the RAF control room. When George and Sybbie’s squadron was sent to break the Siege of Malta and fight in the North Africa Campaign , Marigold would not be left behind. Thus, she resigned commission and became a War Corespondent for her Mamma and Aunt Laura at “The Sketch” - covering George and his men’s exploits from the ‘safety’ of Sybbie’s mechanic’s hanger. Later, during Sybbie’s arch betrayal, Marigold used her media and diplomatic pass as a Marquess’s step-daughter to rescue a hunted George with the help of local resistance. She went on to cover D-Day, Market Garden, and the Battle of the Bulge while attached to a much darker and violent George and his Commandos, 

Marigold was vaulted as a “Female Pioneer in Journalism”. But falling in Love with a Scottish Colonel in the British Airborne during Market Garden, she chose marriage rather than her career. But 10 years later the call of adventure is stirred in the societal matron’s blood once more upon her reunion with best friend George and a Mystery to solve.    

“Do you ever think of it, George?”

“The war?” 

“Would you think me terrible if I told you that I miss it?” 

“What particularly do you miss about the Ardennes or Arnhem Bridge?”

“It’s not the places, not the snowy woods all bundled tight together in our freezing foxhole under artillery fire, or escaping Holland on rubber rafts in the middle of the night ... I miss our men, I miss ... waking up in the morning and knowing that we were apart of something, that it was you and me, and the old chaps, against the world ... I miss being useful, George. I guess, I’d rather like to feel that way again.”  

Ms. Caroline Talbot - Daisy Ridley 

Beautiful, Spoiled, Clever, Selfish, and Effete, the co-heiress to “Branson & Talbot Motors” has spent her life attempting to get a rise out of her mother. As most desirable of debutantes and Crown Princess of British High Society, Caroline spends her days scheming and contriving against other society girls, of whom she loves to torment. Her nights in nightclubs spent drinking and dancing, waking up in different beds throughout the poshest London Houses. 

 She loathes her mother, and blames Henry’s death on George, whose Spitfire shot down the German Bomber that crashed into Henry and Bertie’s train during “The Battle of Britain”. With George and Sybbie having never gotten along with, or been able to stand, Henry - Caroline believes George plotted her father’s death.

However, her arrogance and anger is dropped only in the presence of her best and only true friend, her cousin Edward. The only person in her unhappy life of whom she knows she truly loves.

“JUST SAY IT, MAMMA! WHY CAN’T YOU SAY IT! Why can’t you just say you didn’t love him! I’m certainly not the first unloved child ever born to a widow looking for a cheap thrill! I guess I owe you enough thanks for at least marrying Daddy!”

“Oh, pipe down, you spoiled little bitch!” 

“Shut up, you Nazi whore! You two ran off to have your little adventures and you never stopped to think, just once, about me!” 

“Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ! Here we are again! What could you possibly want more of?! Huh? You got everyone’s attention!” 

“George, leave it!.” 

“No, no more, mom! She got everything I didn’t! She got a mother and father, parents! You left me behind so that you and Henry could start your trendy new fashionable family! You took their side against me! You and Uncle Tom! Just so you can continue to play grab ass with your pathetic little trio! I spent years away from home, Christmases at Aunt Edith’s, all because Henry didn’t want me here! MY OWN HOUSE! And still, after all that, his brat wants more! So, what, Goddamnit!?  What do you want from me, Caroline!?” 

“YOU! I wanted my brother! I loved you and I needed you! And you left me with HER!

Lord Edward Robert Pelham, “Marquess of Hexham” - William Moseley

Upright and just minded, Lord Hexham grew up on the stories of adventure and mystery that his older cousins, George and Sybbie, were famous for. At the death of his father in the war, he looked up to his cousin George as a male role model. 

Thirteen years later, while on break from Oxford - he is not sure what to do with his life. Determined to save his beloved best friend Caroline from a nose dive of alcohol and sex turning into a death spiral, he finds himself at Downton Abbey - a guest of his Aunt Mary - when a murder takes place. But when the Killer leaves a message that it would only be the first. it seems everyone turns to him - as senior peer - for guidance. Unsure what to do, he goes to find his old mentor, George - who has much more experience in this kind of danger and mystery.  

“I don’t know, Marigold ... sometimes I think I’m the wrong man for this job.” 

“Nonsense. In fact, rising above the bias of an older sister and the person who helped raise you, I just happen to think you’re the perfect man for the job.”

“I feel ashamed sometimes. There are lads out there that don’t have two pounds in their hands. And here I am, a Marquess, leaving Oxford, to snuggle up to my big sister’s beast, because, I’m frustrated.”

“Well, they are fantastic breasts.” 

“I’m serious ... I just, I keep telling Caroline that there’s more in life. But I feel like it’s all just words. Neither Mummy nor Papa were ever so ambitious. And it’s not that I want more power, how could I? It’s just ... I feel like there’s something out there, waiting for me to get into its shouting distance.”

Jason Matthew Crawley, Lord of Downton - Unknown (I don’t know child actors)

Born in 1944 to an unknown mother of whom George refuses to speak of to anyone. Mary and the rest of the family were shocked and confused to find George return from the war hobbled on a cane and carrying a toddler that was unmistakably his son.  

Ten years later the blue eyed raven curled boy attends the local Downton school, but is often pursued by high ranking academies for his extremely high intellect. But George refuses to entertain sending him away. Spending most days with Mary,Tom, and Edith, the boy is famed around the county for his Holmesian deduction skills ... and aptitude for machinery - which his father refuses to allow him to pursue. Serving as his father and ‘Uncle Edward’s’ assistant while investigating the murder, they find him a much bigger help than they thought possible.

“You listen to me, Cowboy ... cause I’m only going to tell you once. You stay away from Sybbie, do you understand me?”

“I was just saying that she’s beautiful -” 

“Under no circumstance do you go near her or even speak to that woman.”

“But what does a movie star want with me?”

“This conversation is concluded, mind what I say.” 

“But, Pop ... wha -?”

“That’s an order, Cowboy.”

“Ye- yes, Sir.”

[carol-effing-danvers]

knock me the fuck out (i dare ya, babe) part two

More Teacher Steve and Soft Billy!

Part One 

Prefer Ao3 Format? Click here!

Angie is left to wail with around the living room with increasingly frustrated hunger, because Steve needs to spend the first thirty minutes after he comes home screaming into a pillow.

Had Billy seen him staring?

He was so sweet with Lauren, so gentle to her that Steve couldn’t help his smiling, but he’d seen the annoyed expression on Billy’s face from the corner of his eye when he’d turned away. Could he tell that Steve had been checking him out earlier? Maybe he just didn’t want to call him out in front of Lauren and the other children? Maybe he loathed Steve just as much as ever did?

Steve hugs a pillow to his stomach and rests his cheek atop it, feeling glum. Figures. Figures that the first boy he’d ever been attracted to would roll back into town ten years later (looking finer than any person has a right to!), while Steve spends his days with children and his nights alone.

He can’t even get a girlfriend anymore – after the big bisexual breakdown, no girl in Hawkins will date him, but he wished he had a boyfriend or at least a hookup he could call.

Robin gets dates, but he concedes that it’s probably easier when the entire town doesn’t know you’re a queer.

He can’t date any woman within ten miles of the town – even if she somehow doesn’t already know the whole stupid story yet, someone will happily and gleefully open their mouth to enlighten her. And no man will date him either, because agreeing to that is basically agreeing to let the whole town know who you are. There’d be no hiding it.

Flopping his face back down into the pillow, Steve screams some more, before jumping off the couch with a sudden burst of motion. No, no. He promised himself, he promised Robin, he promised Dustin, that he wasn’t going to make himself feel bad about this anymore. The past was the past, and he couldn’t change it.

So what if his dad never spoke to him and his mom only called twice a year? That was about the amount of contact they used to have! So what if the parents tried to stop him from being hired? They hadn’t been able to succeed and Steve got the job of his dreams anyway! So what if he still had a crush on Billy Hargrove? He’d survived it the first time and he’d survive it again.

God knows he’s survived worse.

“Uh, Steve-o?” Robin asks, looking around the kitchen. “Wanna tell me what happened to you today?”

“What do you mean?” Steve responds absently, without looking up from the pan of mushrooms on the stove.

“Steve, you’re making beef wellington, honey,” she says carefully, as though making Steve aware of this might make him explode or something. “I mean, please don’t stop, because your beef wellington is fucking amazing – but you also only make it when you feel like shit. So. Wanna tell me what’s going on?”

He stares down at the pan. “Did you know that Billy Hargrove was back in town?”

“Billy – Max’s brother, Billy?” Robin asks. Steve could almost feel her bristling. “He didn’t start threatening you again, did he?”

“No, Max was right,” he says, in the soft stilted tone that tells her he’s actually very upset. “He’s much calmer now.”

“Okay,” she says slowly. “Then you need to tell me why you look like someone killed Angie in front of you.”

Woodenly, he replies “Remember how I said I had a crush on a straight boy, back in ’86, when all the shit was going down?”

“Oh my god, Steve-”

“But he wouldn’t give me the time of day, unless it involved his fist and my face? Billy was that boy. Is that boy. Man. Whatever.”

“Steve,” Robin says seriously, grabbing onto his forearms and holding her eyes open wide as she tries not to laugh. “Billy isn’t any straighter than I am.”

---

After leaving Lulu with Steve fucking Harrington, holy shit, Billy feels the urgent need for a cigarette as soon as he leaves the school parking lot. He fishes for a lighter before whispering “Fuck” because of course he can’t smoke in the fucking car anymore, Lulu rides in this car with him now.

Cursing, Billy pounds on the steering wheel and pulls over to furiously smoke a cigarette outside, standing on the side of the road because Steve was there, and how the fuck has he gotten even prettier in the last ten years?, and Billy wanted to fuck him on that desk so bad something was wrong with him, and Steve’s smile for the person Billy loved most in the world was absolutely devastating.

Easy as that blinding smile, Billy could feel the old ghosts of his yearning – if not laid to rest, then at least peaceful in their haunting – live and howl again.

Getting back into the driver’s seat involves a whole new chorus of swearing, but he needs to get into work, mental breakdown or not. The bell over the shop jingles as he steps inside, accompanied by the intoxicating smell of sugar, flour, and vanilla.

The woman standing behind the counter of the bakery display finally manages to break his bad mood and he cracks a smile for her. “Hey, Trouble.”

Eleven leans over the counter, palms flat on the glass, her curls pinned to the back of her head. There’s flour smudged across her face and raspberry jam on her apron. “Who, me?”

He hugs her over the counter and kisses her flour-dusted cheek. “Yeah, you topple any major government conspiracies lately?”

Loftily, El says “I like to take the winters off.”

“Is that right?” he drawls, turning the hand-washing station onto hot after hanging up his jacket. “Then I’m just in time.”

She stares at him from her spot leaning against the pastries display, chin resting on her small fist. “Yes, you are,” she says in that eerie tone that means she isn’t talking about herself anymore. “Welcome home, Billy.”

Drying off his hands, Billy says “How come you ain’t tell me how bad things had gotten with her, huh?”

El stands straight, arms protectively folded over herself. “She was already mad at me for…the whole…”

She waves her hand around ambiguously, but Billy correctly interprets that as ‘spilling the beans on that asshole she married’. “She ain’t mad at you,” he soothes. “She’s mad at herself.”

When Eleven still looks unconvinced, he adds, “Don’t tell her I said so, but I know she misses you. Misses all of the nerd herd.”

“We may not be together anymore, but we miss her too,” she says sadly.

Billy’s gaze sharpened upon her. “You tellin’ me Wheeler just left you out here in this backwoods town all by yourself?”

She shrugs. “We grew up. He wanted to go to MIT and I didn’t want to follow him.”

He wants to tell her that Mike Wheeler was insane to leave her, but honestly, staying in Indiana for a teenage girl and giving up MIT was way more insane.

El nods. “Yeah, that’s what I told him.”

He glares at her. “No peaking, Ellie.”

She lifts her hands in surrender. “Stop thinking at me so loud, then.”

Steve, Steve, Steve – has she seen about Steve? El’s eyes widen. Shit. SHIT. SHIT.

“Uh..” She chews at her bottom lip.

“We are not talking about this,” he informs her flatly, pushing the door to the back room open. “You’re gonna pretend you didn’t…hear…see…whatever.”

“Billy…” she says hesitantly.

“What I literally just say?” he demands.

“Yes, okay, but…” Her eyes search his expression intently. “Um…Max didn’t tell you what happened during Spring Break in ’86, did she?”

He swore he was ‘bout to get whiplash from this girl. “Noooo,” he says, drawn out. “Why? What happened back in ’86?”

“Um…” El’s face turns red and she scratches nervously at the nape of her neck. “Steve, um…oh, never mind! Ask Max if you want to know.”

---

“What do you mean, Billy’s not straight?!” Steve demands, practically standing on the kitchen counter as he yells the question at her.

Robin is still trying very hard not to laugh. “Uh, okay…how do I put this…I want you to look back on your memory of Billy Hargrove when we were in high school, Steve. Think really, really hard. Did you ever actually see him kissing a girl? Dating any girls, back in school? Can you name a single girl he dated?”

“Everybody knew he was a total horndog,” Steve scoffs, feeling that old belated jealousy rear its ugly head.

“No, I don’t care about what everyone knew. What did you see, Steve? Remember the way Billy dressed?”

He rolls his eyes. “He was from California, Rob.”

“I visited Disneyland when I was sixteen. I did not see anyone in California dressed like that. He wore eyeliner and curled his hair, Steve. And if I’m remembering this correctly, that boy flashed his tits like he was starring in his own fucking porn video.” She smirks at his steadily reddening cheeks. “Your boy? Is gay, Steve-o.”

Robin pauses and squints a moment, as though staring at something in the distance. “Wait, Billy was a lifeguard that summer, right? Red shorts, came into Scoops and ordered…”

“Double strawberry,” Steve mutters, feeling bitchy and depressed.

“Oh my god.” This time, Robin couldn’t hold the laughter in.

“What?” he asks, annoyed. “I mean, I know the mustache wasn’t really working for him back then, but you should see-”

“No-no-no,” she cackles, holding her sides. “Oh my god, boys are so dumb. Steve-Steve, back then? Billy wanted to choke on your dick real bad.”

He stares at her blankly.

“Real bad, Steve.”

“What are you even talking ab-no! No!” Steve snaps. “Billy hated me! He beat my face in and tormented me from the moment he stepped into town, Rob!”

It’s Robin’s turn to scoff. “You’ve never heard about that trite old adage about boys who pull on little girls’ pigtails, Steve? Except that his little girl was another boy – a boy who already had a girlfriend when he got into town.”

“No way,” Steve snaps.

“And he wants this boy’s attention really, really bad, Steve. But this boy had just got his heart broken and didn’t know he also liked boys, yet. Billy’s boy won’t give him the attention he wants and he’s got a lot of anger management and self-control issues. We see that in the classroom every day, Steve. What do you think Billy would do?”

“That’s a pretty picture you’re painting,” Steve says flatly, rolling their wellington into its blanket of puff pastry. “I have a much simpler explanation – Billy was an egomaniac who thought I was at the head of the Hawkins food chain and decided that he was going to be the new apex predator and humiliated me to accomplish that. Him being gay or not doesn’t factor into it.”

Robin pours them both a glass of red – she’ll have to drink a lot of water if she doesn’t want a headache, but she needs it tonight. “Okay, I’ll make you a deal,” she says airily. “I bet you a full year of grading tests that Billy Hargrove would totally suck face with you.”

“Okay, hold on a fucking minute!” he sputters. “Even assuming this bullshit your on about him having the hots for me ten years ago is true, that has nothing to do with right now!”

“Steve, you look like a nerd,” she says gently. “And nerd really works for you, dingus. If he doesn’t want to at least make out with you a little, the man has no taste and you need to move on.”

“How about I skip the whole question and move on regardless,” Steve says dryly.

“Then you forfeit the bet and you’re marking all of my quizzes for the entire school year next year.”

“Goddamn it, Robin.”

---

“Uncle Billy, what are those silver thingies on your tummy?” Lulu asks, poking at the scars covering his torso where her uncle is in the middle of washing the dishes.

Very seriously, Billy says “That’s where I got bitten by the werewolf.”

He hears Max mutter “Oh my god, Billy”, but she doesn’t attempt to dissuade him from telling the story the way he pleased – after all, what would she tell her? That Uncle Billy was possessed by an interdimensional alien being that had come to Hawkins through a hole in the world beneath their feet and fought a monster made of pulverized corpses with his bare hands? Werewolf it is, then!

“Nooo, Uncle Billy, you’re not a werewolf!” she protests with a little giggle.

“Yes I am. Uh-oh, Lulu,” he says somberly. “Oh, no – it’s-it’s the full moon!”

She vibrates with anticipation, giving a loud shriek when Billy lets out a wolf-like howl and lunges for her. “RAAAAAAAAAH!”

“NOOOOOO!!!”

He wears her out good, chasing her around the house for nearly an hour before he convinces her it’s time to go to bed now. He lets Max relax and talks Lulu through bedtime himself. Feeling like a dickhead as he plops down onto the sofa, where Max is watching a rerun of Friends, Billy just sucks it up and says “So, what’s up with Harrington and Spring Break of ’86?”

To his complete surprise, Max’s jaw gets tight and her eyes flash. “Jesus fucking Christ, the people in this town really can’t keep their mouths shut, can they?” she says angrily. “So who told you, huh?”

“Uh…what?” he says blankly, feeling really far away all of a sudden. “Ellie-Eleven told me I need to ask you about Harrington and what happened in ’86, she never said why I need to ask.”

Yeah, he was still very unclear about why this was a story he had to hear.

Max gives him an owlish stare. “She…she wanted you to know?”

“…’s what she said, man.” He shrugs.

“Wow. Okay. Uh…so during Spring Break, one of your old classmates came home from college and threw this really big party,” Max begins, puffing her cheeks out with a sigh. “Steve and his friend Robin – you remember Robin? Blonde, used to work with him at Scoops? They were at this party, and the longer the night went on, the more that shit got out of hand. Like people were passed out on the front lawn. Someone broke into the neighbor’s house because they were too drunk to realize they knocked on the wrong door. Todd Grace took the riding lawn mower from the garage and crashed it somewhere on the golf course down the road. So, naturally the cops showed up.”

“Naturally,” Billy says neutrally, still wondering exactly where in the hell this story was going.

“Everybody freaked when they came in and Robin couldn’t find Steve, so she assumed that he’d hooked up with someone and forgot to tell her that he was leaving. She didn’t realize that he was still there, and he had no idea that the cops had come and were already in the house.”

She stops and stares at the ceiling. “If anybody in this town could keep their mouths closed, that would be the end of the story, but some of the officers blabbed, and now the whole fucking town knows that they found Steve Harrington in a closet on his knees, sucking off two high school seniors.”

Billy’s brain starts floating on ‘Steve Harrington on his knees’ and launches itself into outer space at ‘sucking off’. Immediately it becomes critical that he try not to picture that – young Steve, still doe-eyed and pretty, but brattier, the stuck up ice princess, with his soft sweet mouth wrapped around-

Max’s jaw tightens up with rage again. “I find it really interesting that whenever someone tells that story, they never mention Mike Tentiss or Zach Cooper, but they were the ones standing there with their pants around their ankles.”

Billy stares at the television without really seeing another on the screen. “Why you never tell me that story, Maxine?”

She’s known he was gay since just before she got married. She kept making jokes about getting him a nice girlfriend or hooking up with one of her bridesmaids, until Billy had just snarled over the phone “Maxine, I am a FUCKING queer!”

Softly, Max says “Cause it started this whole town-wide drama and it almost ruined Steve’s life, Billy. Darlene Cooper tried to have him arrested for molesting her son, but obviously Zach was only a year younger than him. She went around to our house and the Wheeler’s and the Sinclair’s and Mrs. Henderson and Mrs. Byers and tried to get one of us to say Steve had…done something to us.”

“Jesus Christ.” That sounds like something out of Billy’s worst nightmares.

She dips her head into a nod. “Uh-huh. It didn’t work, obviously, and Mrs. Byers – I never saw her that mad, Billy. She screamed at Darlene something awful. Some of the parents threw a fit when the school hired him, said he didn’t have any business being around kids, but I think his mom pulled some strings. She and his dad have basically disowned him. He thought none of us would want to speak to him ever again – I mean, the boys got a little weird for a bit, but Erica was…Erica, and they came around. It’s really sad, though. He’s one of the nicest men I know, but no girl in town will go out with him.”

Confused, Billy says “Uh, ain’t he…?”

She shrugs. “Robin says he likes both, I guess. Anyway, no woman in this town will go on a date with him, and no man will so much as be alone in a room with him. Like if Steve sneezes on them, they’ll suddenly want to suck a dick or something.”

Oh, I’d do a helluva lot more than be alone in a room with Steve Harrington. And there wouldn’t be any ‘suddenly’ about it.

Billy realizes that Max is looking very suspicious right now and narrows his eyes. “Max. Maxie. Maxine. Maxine Roberta, please tell me that you and Eleven aren’t trying to set me up on a date with Steve Harrington.”

His baby sister looks even guiltier. She picks at her fingernails, staring down at her lap. “You don’t-you’ve never talk about any guys that you’re going out with, you’ve never even told me that you were interested in a guy,” she mumbles. “I just…don’t want you to be lonely. Dustin thinks Steve is – lonely, I mean. You’re the same age and you can both…y’know. Handle all the weird shit around here.”

“Mad Max,” he sighs, and tucked the wisps of red hair behind her ears the way he had for Lulu this morning. “I was not nice to Harrington. I was never nice to Harrington – and I don’t just mean the night I nearly killed him. There was a whole bunch of shit you guys weren’t around to see. The fact that we’re both willing to suck a dick doesn’t change anything, Max.”

“But you apologized for that ten years ago!” She pleads with her big blue eyes. “Please? I’m not asking you to go on a date with him, just be nice to him when you see him, okay?”

Gruffly, he says “That why ya didn’t wanna tell me who Lulu’s teacher was?”

---

Saturday morning means going to the 11th Hour, because Robin has a hangover and going to the 11th means that they don’t really have to get dressed because El has seen them both covered in mud, blood (their own), blood (others), blood (alien), and puke – all at the same time.

Also, Steve is a grown ass man who can’t be bothered to put on real adult clothes unless he has to teach and today he’s just fucking given up on his hair because the only people who are gonna see him are Robin, who still calls him dingus after ten years of knowing him, and El, who still seems to think he’s Prince Charming after ten years of knowing him (god help her).

Steve and Robin both think it’s very cute that Eleven the Eggo Queen decided she wanted to open a bakery when she grew up. And she’s really good at it, too. She makes this spiced tart thingy with pears and cherries that he would hold someone at gunpoint for. He loves it so much that she makes a big one on his birthday every single year.

Her eyes light up when they walk through the door, looking so pleased that Steve has a guilty thought that they may’ve been neglecting her a little. “Good morning!” she greets, wriggling with excitement as she leans over the counter. “Christmas galette for Steve and for Robbie…?”

“Tart au citron,” Robin says decisively after a moment’s thought. “And coffee.”

“Lots of coffee,” Steve adds with a grimace. The half a bottle of wine was a mistake and he’d known it was gonna be a mistake even as he was pouring their glasses. “El, can you pretty please with chocolate chip Eggos on top make your hangover sandwiches for me? I’ll watch the counter for you! Please?”

Even more pleased, El says “Oh that’s okay, I can make them. Hang on.”

The swinging robin’s egg blue of the backroom door opens, a voice behind it murmuring, “Lulu, skip to my lou. Lulu, skip to my lou.” A distracted Billy walks in carrying Lauren one-handed, half sleeping across her uncle’s shoulder, and a Styrofoam cup in the other. “Lulu, skip to my lou, my darlin’…”

His cheek rests on her head and the forearm supporting Lauren’s weight bulges with muscle beneath the skin and Steve’s fucking knees feel like water.

“Can you watch the front for a few minutes?” El asks pleasantly, ignoring the shell-shocked look on Steve’s face and the intense scrutiny Robin is giving her employee.

“Sure…boss…” Billy says slowly, eyeing his former classmates suspiciously. He wants this boy’s attention really, really bad, Steve.

He suppresses a snort. In Nancy’s very succinct words – it’s all just bullshit.

---

Who let this man walk out of the house that way? Was it Buckley? Was she trying to cause a goddamn riot? Wasn’t there a law against being such a fucking tease? Malicious seduction or something?

Still mostly dressed in pajamas with his glasses hastily shoved on and his hair looking like he’d stuck his finger in an electric socket, Steve looked tired and fresh from bed, even softer and sleepier than the cardigan and khaki look at school yesterday. Billy wanted to push him down on a bed, straddle his waist and kiss him for ages. Kiss him until those heavy eyelids went from surprised to dark and glazed with lust.

“Hello, Mister H,” Lulu, his sweet saving angel, mumbles into his shoulder.

That sunny-warm smile brightens up his face again, and Billy’s heart gives a painful squeeze. “Good morning, Lauren. Are you helping Billy at work.”

“Uh-huh,” she grunts, eyes closing again. “Woke me up.”

“Aw, I’m sorry,” he says, all sympathy and sad eyes.

God, this is fucking torture. And Maxine had to go and like…give him fucking hope and shit. Jesus.

“You wanna go back and lay down in Miss Hopper’s officer, Lulu?”

“Uh-huh,” she repeats, still clinging to his shirt.

He makes his very hasty retreat, not looking at El as he passes her in the kitchen. Unfortunately, when he returns to the front counter, Steve is still there, but Buckley seems to have disappeared and he’s blushing now, maybe because the whole universe fucking hates him and then Steve is right up in his face and says “I’m just gonna get this over with, please don’t hit me-”

And then-

-his mouth, still tinged with the minty clean taste of toothpaste, so fucking soft against Billy’s lips, his long fingers lightly touching Billy’s jawline. Steve’s cheeks are cool where Billy touches them, but his mouth is burning hot. The erection he was just managing to get under control before surges to painful, insistent life in his jeans when Steve sighs and moans, large curling around the back of his neck.

Billy answers with a low groan, fingers twisting through the silky strands of his hair to hold him there – not that Steve seems keen to escape.

Breathing is a tragic necessity, though.

“Oh,” Steve exhales as Billy pulls away reluctantly, and his eyes are just as dark, just as sloe and heavy as Billy always dreamed they’d be. He’s still clinging to the front of his shirt and his mouth looks wine-red from kissing, which only makes Billy wanna kiss him more. “I’m gonna grade quizzes for a year.”

[lovehugsandcandy]

A King Adores His Queen (RoD, Colt x MC)

A/N: And THIS is part three. This is kinda based on a prompt from @brightpinkpeppercorn (your ask was a lap dance, which this isn’t, but I am hoping it is close enough?).

Pairing: Colt x MC, ROD

Length: ~4400 words

Rating: N*FW (This was supposed to be just smutty but then turned sappy as hell, idk, I’m sorry)

Summary: Colt comes back from a job and finds a surprise in his bed. (Spoiler alert: It’s Ellie.)

It was later than Colt would have liked when they got back. The mission went well but couldn’t exactly be called a success. All he wanted was to see under the Badger hat, to finally be able to put a face to the nameless entity tormenting his dad, but it was too dark and far too risky to get any closer. They had managed to hand off the car but anything else was futile.

His neck cracked as he rolled his head, knots of tension hovering under the surface of his skin as he opened the door. And stopped cold. 

Instead of the darkness he was expecting, there was a flickering light, bathing his walls in a soft glow. He poked his head in, cautious, to see a candle alight on his bureau. That wasn’t there where he left. He didn’t even own a candle.

A slow step into the room, glancing around, and then a pause when he caught sight of his bed. She definitely wasn’t there when he left. If she had been there, sitting against the headboard, wearing one of his button downs, sly smile spreading across her face…if she had been there, he would never have been able to leave his room.

He never wanted her to move from his bed. 

He walked in, closing the door behind him, eyes never leaving hers. Her legs were bare, crossed in front of her, candlelight dancing over her smooth skin. 

“This is a surprise.”

“Hopefully a good one?”

“A great one.” He shrugged off his jacket, rounding the corner of the bed to sit beside her, eyes dropping to her lips, lower. Most of the buttons on the shirt were done up so he couldn’t tell what she wore under it. Hopefully nothing. Damn, he liked how she looked in his clothes. “Hi.”

She had a coy smile on her face, studying him, chin raised. “How was your night?”

“Worlds better now.” 

She smiled wider and he started to lean forward to kiss her, but she stopped him, index finger on her lips, pushing him back. “Uh huh. I don’t think so.”

“Umm…” His eyes widened as she leaned forward, inches from him, eyes sparking. The shirt shifted with the movement and he couldn’t help it, had to see; his eyes dropped down. She was definitely wearing something under his shirt, something he had never seen, all dark lines and lace. He looked up; by the smirk on her face, she could tell exactly what he was looking at. “What? You’re gorgeous.” He wasn’t ashamed; he would look at every single inch of her that he could, every sliver of skin she deigned to grace his eyes with.

“I saw how you looked at me. At the club.” She slid out of the bed to stand in front of him, looking down through her lashes.

“Huh?”

“When I was in the uniform.”

Colt sucked in a breath through his teeth and wondered how he had lost control of the situation. This girl. “I mean, it was very flattering.”

“Hmm…” She tilted her head to study him. “You should have heard some of the things the waitress suggested I might need to do in that basement.”

“Anything you’re interested in doing?”

She only pursed her lips at him.

“Come here, baby,” He reached out a hand to curl it around her thigh, to bring her to him, but she stepped back with a slow shake of the head.

“No touching.”

His eyebrows shot to his forehead. “Excuse me?”

“I said no touching. Hands to your side.” His arms moved of his own accord, fists balling against the sheets as he gaped at her. She only grinned, teeth gleaming in the dim light. “Very good.”

“Baby, what are you doing?”

“I saw how you looked at me, when I was wearing next to nothing.”

“I told you, you’re gorgeous.”

She knelt down to bring her lips to his ear. “Maybe I liked it.” Her teeth latched onto his earlobe, a slow graze then a gentle bite, and Colt had the sudden urge to unbutton his pants. They were definitely not this tight before. She continued, “So here’s what’s going to happen. No touching and I will show you what I have on under your shirt.” She pulled back, hands fiddling with the top button. “If you behave.”

“What brought this on?” 

A shrug, a bite of her lip. “Maybe I wanted to try something.” A light flush covered her cheeks, the tip of her nose. “Maybe I like being your queen.” Colt had to twine his fingers in the sheets to stop from reaching out as she undid the first button.

“Ok.” He had to lean back, to get some space between him and the unbearable temptation. “What are the other rules?”

“That’s it. Just no touching.” She slid forward, legs on either side of him, almost in his lap, inches between their bodies.

Colt felt his breathing speed up, shallow puffs, raspy in the room. “Ok. Cuz I really wanna see that shirt on the ground so I don’t want to break any of your rules.”

“Somehow I think you’ll be ok.” The smile that graced her face was honest, hopeful and he couldn’t help but mirror it, lost in her eyes. He didn’t know how someone so innocent could be so sexy, but he would never get enough. Her hands returned to the shirt and Colt could only watch, transfixed, as she opened another button.

“You only buttoned five. I’m 40% of the way there.”

She slid closer, legs wrapping around him as she perched in his lap; he couldn’t stop the moan that fell from his mouth as their hips touched. “It only gets harder from here.”

“No kidding.” He pushed his hips up, grinding into her; it was hard enough already.

“Hey! No touching!” 

“Sorry, sorry.” He really needed to get these pants off. “I thought you meant hands.”

She trailed a finger down his cheek, skirting over his chest, lower as his stomach twitched. “It’s ok. The rules weren’t clear.” She paused at his button, looking at him with a start. “Can I touch you?”

“What?”

“Well, consent is important and all.” Her hand hovered over his pants.

He had to laugh. “Ellie, yes, you can touch me. God yes. Anytime. And apparently in any location.”

She smirked, leaning forward, stopping when her lips were inches from his, so close he could smell cherry lip gloss, so close he had to stop himself from closing the distance to taste it. “Good.” With a snap, she popped the button on his pants, pulling the zipper down to give him some room.

“Oh, thank God.” His body sagged in relief. He was hard as hell with Ellie right on top of him, barely dressed. Apparently, she had turned into a siren while he was out. If she was going to kill him, what a way to go.

She didn’t respond, didn’t kiss him; she only pulled back and undid another button on her shirt, eyes fixed on him the entire time. Now that it was mostly open, he could see the dark lace following the curves of her breast. It was similar to the outfit at the club, the uniform that the waitresses all wore in that seedy basement. He didn’t really notice it on the others but, as soon as he saw Ellie, the mission expanded. He no longer had just needed to steal the car; he also needed to get her alone as soon as possible.

“Ellie?” Fuck, he needed to get her out of these clothes as soon as possible.

“Yeah?”

“I know you said I couldn’t touch you with my hands and I couldn’t grind on you…” She was so close to him, soft skin so close, even more tempting since he couldn’t reach out and touch. “But could I kiss you? Touch you with my lips?”

She narrowed her eyes, considering. He could see the gears turning; she knew him far too well. 

“Please?”

Slowly, she nodded. “Ok.”

He grinned at her, tilting his head and leaning closer, brushing a soft kiss over her lips before ducking his head to trail his lips along the strap of her bra. The soft moan above him made his cock twitch and he continued down, grabbing the lace with he teeth so he could pull, edging it lower until he could wrap his lips around her nipple. Ellie’s hand flew to the back of his head, grabbing his hair in a tight grip.

“Stop.” She was breathing hard, mouth open, pupils blown as she looked at him. “That was not playing fair. No more touching.”

He opened his mouth to complain and promptly shut it. “You know, consent is important and you can rescind it at any time.”

“That is very mature of you.” He watched her hands hungrily as she unbuttoned the next one, exposing the top of her stomach.

He swallowed. “Why, thank you.” Her eyes watched his tongue trace his lips, eyes sharp. “But if you wanted to let me touch you, I would tear that shirt off of you and let my tongue show you exactly how appreciative I am.”

Her hands dropped to the last button and she took her time, fingers playing with the plastic before finally sliding it through the buttonhole. “Maybe later.”

“That’s not a no.”’ Now that the buttons we all open, he couldn’t help but stare, her soft curves right in front of him, candlelight dancing across her skin, lace separating him from her breasts and her clit and all the parts of her that he could make sing, if he could just touch them.

She shrugged the shirt off her shoulders, letting his fall to the floor behind her, and his eyes immediately focused on the hickie at the junction of her neck and shoulder. It was fading, shadow barely visible, and he had to stop himself from moving forward, attaching his lips and his teeth to the mark so he could deepen it, make it obvious to everyone, obvious that she belonged to someone who knew she was a queen and who wasn’t going to let her go without a fight.

When he looked into her face again, he had to shrug, sheepish; anyone with eyes could see where he was focused. She stood, fond smile on her face, before she turned around so he could see her back, her ass, the lace curving around her cheeks. He had to shut his eyes, couldn’t look for another second without losing control. When he looked up again, she shot him a wink, grinning, as her hands unbuckled her bra and it fell to the floor.

“Ellie.” His brain was broken and he needed to sit on his hands so he couldn’t surge forward to pull her into bed with him. “Ellie, please.”

She grinned, the evil girl, slithering into his lap again. “You sound like you’re begging.”

“I will if you want me to.”

“I want you to take off your shirt.” His hands couldn’t move fast enough as he grabbed the fabric and pulled, over his head, thrown somewhere, desperate to comply with her directions.

“Ellie….” He would have been embarrassed with anyone else, voice a whine, needy, but he would do anything, anything, if she would just let him touch her.

She only leaned forward, peaks of her breasts trailing over his chest; his muscles twitched and he had to bite his lip to muffle the moan.

“Baby, please…”

He had to focus on staying still as she rested her cheek on his shoulder. He tried to suppress the shiver that traveled through him as her hair tickled his arm; based on the smile he could feel along his neck, he wasn’t successful.

“Take the rest of your clothes off.” Her voice was low in his ear and he had to suck in a deep breath to keep his composure. She shifted so he could strip, kneeling next to him so he could kick off his shoes, pull off his pants, get everything off off off as fast as humanly possible. He was so hard, so desperate to bury himself inside her, but he had to play by the goddamn rules.

She was hovering next to him, patiently waiting, small smile on her lips, right there, soft skin so temptingly close. He arched his neck closer to her, so close he could almost feel her heat on his face.

“Colt…” she warned from above him. He pursed his lips and blew out, a slow, steady stream of air curving down her breast to her stomach. He was gratified to hear the strangled moan above him, to see the goosebumps trailing after the puff of breath on her skin. Another breath, lower, tracing the line of her underwear as Ellie’s stomach contracted and she gasped.

“I’m not touching you.”

“Oh my God, are you ten?” Her fingers found her way to his hair, a scrape of nails on his scalp. “Do we need a line of tape in the backseat of the car to separate you from your siblings?”

The laugh was punched out of him, loud in the silence of the room. He looked up at her and was sure that she could see into his soul. “I love you.”

The fingers in his hair stilled. “What did you say?”

“You heard me.” He knew how he felt.

“Colt?”

“Yeah?”

Her lips were trembling. “Touch me.”

He had never moved so fast in his life, hands grabbing her waist and pulling her down to the mattress, so quickly that her hair bounced, fanning around her as she landed, curls bouncing about her face as he curved around her, desperate. He didn’t have time to admire the way that she looked in his bed, glowing in the candlelight like a goddamn angel, because all he could think about was covering her, having their skin and lips meet in every single spot they could now that he was finally, finally able to feel her. His hands wouldn’t stop moving, running up and down her sides, her thighs, anywhere, everywhere, desperate to touch the miles of skin she kept from him. Even minutes of being in her space without the ability to touch, to feel, to taste those lips with his own until she whined, was far too long.

He had pulled back for breath, hands somehow tangled in her hair, and Ellie spoke. 

“Worth the wait?”

He had to pause, considering her, the flush on her cheeks, the pink of her lips. “How about I ask you that when I’m done with you?” Before she could respond, he ducked his head to attach his lips to the faded hickie on her neck, lips and teeth refreshing the mark as she squirmed above him.

When he was happy with the result, delicate skin bright red at the intersection of her neck and her shoulder, he kept moving down, lips finding her breast, tongue teasing her nipple until it hardened and Ellie let out the most delicious moan. He trailed his hands down her waist, the side of her stomach, hands dipping inside the lace to touch her hips, thumbs slotting next to skin and bone as if they belonged there, as if the contours of her body were designed with his fingers in mind, spots made for him to touch and caress as she squirmed, drawing tempting noises that fell from her lips.

His fingers slid over her upper thighs, trapped by lace as his lips slid to her other nipple. A delicious shiver shot through her and he couldn’t help but cant his hips, cock tracing over the fabric that separated them, the tiny piece of lace that stopped him from burying himself in her. At the shudder in her breath, he did it again and he couldn’t stop the stutter from his own throat at the pleasure that flashed through him, a hot flush that made him hold her hip in place to he could grind against her and feel more of the exquisite warmth radiating from his cock to his toes, beads of sweat forming on his brow.

He swatted her hands away as she tried to shimmy the offending panties off, looking up at her with his tongue on her nipple. “No way.” Her eyes widened as he continued. “I’m going to touch every single inch of you.” His mouth trailed lower, salt and skin and Ellie on his tongue as she gaped. “I can play dirty too, you know…”

He traced the line of the lace, fingers ducking in and out of the hem before following with his tongue. He had to shuffle down so he could slide even lower, fingers sliding over the lace to find her clit, teasing the nub over the thin fabric.

“Are you-oh my God- are you kidding me?” Her fingers were tangled in the sheets, holding on so tightly he wondered if her fingernails were going to rip through the fabric.

He wondered if he could make it happen, a tear in his bed to remind him of her when she couldn’t be here herself. “Well, you’re the one who decided to become a temptress while I was out.” He wondered if he could make it so she could always be here.

“Oh my God, Col-.” Her words were cut off with a moan, a tightening of her fists as his tongue replaced his fingers to tease her clit. The lace was rough, different from the normal warmth of Ellie’s body falling apart under him, but it was still her, her body shaking as he worked his tongue in a pattern he knew better than anything else in the world. She was wet, slick visible even through the fabric, and he shifted the underwear to reach inside her, one finger then two, a steady flick of his tongue and crook of his fingers that made her mutter a curse.

Her fingers tightened in the sheets even more. Almost there.

He knew it wouldn’t be long when her legs tensed and started shaking, small tremors that only increased as she got wetter, coating his fingers, and louder, more curses, his name, unintelligible sounds that made him somehow harder. He had to grind against the bed for a semblance of relief but it wasn’t enough; only Ellie would be enough, only her core welcoming him home, yet another part of her body designed for him and him alone. 

One last crook of his fingers, one last swipe of his tongue, and success-he could hear the sound of fabric ripping as her hand tightened. She screamed as she clenched around his fingers, a rhythmic tightening that made him bite his lip so he wouldn’t follow her into ecstasy. 

“Please, Colt, please.” Her voice was weak, a beg above him, but he only shook his head.

“I told you, I am going to touch every single inch of you.” He wiped his fingers on the sheets and slid his hand down her leg, down the soft silk skin of her thigh to the curve of her knee, which also had a concave place designed for his fingers to grip and hold before he continued, down even lower to slide eager hands over her ankle, feet, back up. “I meant what I said.”

“Oh my God-” Her words were cut off again as he grabbed her hips and turned her onto her stomach so he could admire this side of her, miles of skin all his to tease and touch. He trailed his hands back up the other leg before sliding them underneath that damn lace, cupping the curves of her ass better than any fucking piece of fabric could. 

Enough was enough. He grabbed the hem and pulled, sliding the underwear off of her to stare, cupping her ass again to watch his fingers form divots in the soft flesh, small depressions that he rubbed and massaged and then kissed before edging his way up to trail his lips up her spine. Ellie was moaning, lips forming patterns of noise against his bed as his hands rolled up her back and his lips found her neck.

He slotted his hands on her sides to turn her, again, so he could straddle her hips, biting back a curse as his cock settled into the crook of her hip. He was surveying her neck, wondering if he should add a love bite to the other side of her neck, make a symmetrical pair of designs that matched his mouth, when she reached an unsteady hand up to cup his cheek.

“Colt, please.” Her voice was needy, a whine, a beg, a plea that made his cock leap. Fuck, he loved it when she moaned his name.

“Seriously?” He caught her eye, hand tracing a teasing path down her chest, watching her eyes flutter shut as he traced a breast. “You’re telling me to get on with it?”

She shot him a withering glare through glistening eyes. “Whatever happened to ‘anything for you, baby’?”

He rolled his eyes at her.

“I’m serious. If you don’t fuck me in the next three minutes…”

He smirked. “De-mand-in-” He was in the middle of drawing the syllables out, watching the outrage flash across her face, when she leapt, pushing his shoulders so he collapsed onto the bed next to her. In the next second, she moved, barely giving him a second to breathe before she positioned him at her entrance and slid down.

He couldn’t hold in the gasp, the moan, the noise pulled deep from his throat as he was encased in tightness, in heat, in unimaginable pleasure so immediate he had to shut his eyes and breathe through his nose and clutch the soft skin of her thighs until his mind was able to regain control over his body.

“Fuck, Ellie.” When he was able to open his eyes, he almost had to shut them again at the sight that greeted him. Her head was thrown back, the expanse of her neck bared, and the miles of skin she kept from him for far too long was glowing, candlelight shining over her skin like a piece of art, a priceless work that he somehow got his hands on and was never giving up. 

“Cooolt-” She tightened her legs and started moving over him, a slow up-and-down grind that made his breath catch. Fuck. He was so distracted by her and her skin and the noises he could pull from her lips that he didn’t realize how close he was, how absolutely destroyed he was, how badly he wanted to thrust inside of her until his name was the only word she could think.

He couldn’t stop himself from reaching up, tracing her curves, the contours of her breast, sliding down to her thighs, chasing the flickering light as it bathed her skin in an ethereal glow. His thumb made its way to her clit, a slow circle that made Ellie grind in counterpoint to his thrust.

“Fuck, Ellie.” He moved his hips again, the warmth, the clench almost overwhelming around him as his thumb moved faster. He couldn’t help but stare as she moved over him, chasing her pleasure, eyes shut, breasts bouncing as as she rode him, candlelight still bathing her sweat-slicked skin. “Fuck, you feel so good.”

She didn’t respond, only bit her lip as she moved faster and faster over him, familiar tremors starting to overtake her body. He pulled her down to crash his lips into hers, wanted to pull her into him and hold her tight as his hand and his cock made her fall apart all over again, pulling him over the edge as well.

When the tremors stopped and the light behind his eyes was starting to dim, he cursed, lowly, as Ellie rolled off of him and collapsed on the bed, boneless. His reached out, blindly grasping air and the sheets and finally skin before his fingers drifted over her arm to lace their fingers together. He never wanted her to leave his bed, wondered if there was a way to keep her here forever, naked and sated and pliant and soft. Unfortunately, he knew they needed to move, uncurl and clean up; even if she stayed tonight, chances were high there would be a time when his bed would be as empty as he expected when he came back from the job.

Once they were clean and comfortable and the only light bathing the room was moonlight filtering in from the window, they fell back into bed, content and warm. He clutched her close, nose buried in her neck so he could drown in her warmth and her smell and her closeness, so close that he hoped her chest would be stuck to his back when they awoke. He smiled against her skin when he remembered.

“Worth the wait?”

She spun under his arm to face him. “You always are.” Their faces were inches from each other, his hand cradled at her lower back. “I love you.”

“I know.” He couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across his face. “But it would have been embarrassing if you didn’t say it.” His skin sparked with electricity in all the places their bodies touched, his arm around her waist, their legs tangled together. Ellie was naked in his arms but she wasn’t just Ellie anymore; she was the girl he loved, the girl who loved him, the girl who saved his life, the girl who drove him crazy. Maybe he wasn’t as ready for sleep as he thought.

“You know, I feel like we should celebrate this.”

“Celebrate wha-oooh…” She trailed off into a moan as he nudged her ear with his nose, turning her head so he could start on a less obvious love bite behind her ear.

“We should have ‘I love you’ sex.”

“Really?” She laughed and it was like the sun was dawning. His heart had never been this full. “What exactly is ‘I love you’ sex?”

“The kinda sex where I touch you all I want, for one.” He rolled on top of her, a slow grind of his hips showing her exactly where he wanted to touch her.

“Hmmm…” She bit her lip, a wicked smile on her lips. “Maybe I would be amenable to some ‘I love you’ sex.”

He winked, delighting in the happiness blooming on her face, and kissed her, mentally planning out all the ways he wanted to touch her, all the things he wanted to do to her to have the best ‘I love you’ sex of her life.

It was gonna be the kind of sex that made her never want to leave.

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