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2af-afterdark · 1 year ago

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I'm so sad to see whb has been delayed again, especially since it's just a few days since the scheduled release but honestly I expected it when the final devil has to even be teased. I don't want to get too upset at prettybusy because they're a really small team making a large game but they have a seemingly long running habit of making promises they can't keep and it's hurting people's faith in them. My patience is really wearing thin.

I can't imagine how upset Korean players are after finding out they won't be able to play the game they've been looking forward to literally 6 days before release. Also why do the refunds mean global release has to be delayed?? I may not know anything about game development but I genuinely don't understand the reasoning here.

-🌗

Honestly, I don't know a lot about game development or running one either, but I also don't understand why the game being pulled in the Korean market means they can't release globally either. In fact, I would think holding the global release would be better because (and this is the part of my brain that understands they're a business) they could start getting in game purchases which would stock their coffers and give them more cushion to carry out the refunds. Of course, it could be that they are delaying so they don't have to worry about the cost of the servers atm, but I would think getting the money for the game they have clearly sunk a pretty penny into would be a top priority.

And, like, it sucks for the Korean players. It really does. I would hate to be told that I literally cannot play the game I have been looking forward to for half a year. It's a shitty situation, especially since PrettyBusy is Korean based. I don't know what the issue they are facing is, but I feel like they should have announced sooner that it was happening. Like I said, these announcements keep coming really late. Almost like they are panicking to find solutions so they can try and weasel out of telling the fanbase the bad news instead of being upfront once they know something is wrong.

Honestly, I understand faith in PB getting shaky (mine is). This is delay number three, which builds up expectations you don't want people to have. I feel like it wouldn't be as disappointing if they had just delayed further in the future from the start. It's not the length of delay that hurts. It's how many delays there have been. I was literally talking to someone today about how I felt the game was going to be delayed again (and it was). It doesn't help that some games get announced and then never touched (again, Ark Academy).

I know people are mentioning that the PB team is small (less than 30 people by the sounds of it), but that isn't actually the issue I have. I get if the team is small. If that's what makes it too hard to release and issue refunds, then fine. What bothers me is the lack of transparency until they literally have to say something. If the issue was that Korean players literally couldn't register, then they knew about that for a while. They could have (and should have) said something. They could have started dealing with the issue earlier or issuing refunds when they realized they couldn't fix it.

It's a build up of things that starts to get to you.

Personally, this is the last delay I will be patient with. Anything more and I will likely stop following the game until it magically drops (if it drops). I believe actions more than words, and the lack of communication and constant delays sets the tone for me, no matter how politely they word their announcements.

EDIT: I want to clarify that I do feel sympathy for PrettyBusy. They are a Korean studio and have found they cannot release in their own home country. That has to suck for them and their Korean fanbase. They are doing the right thing giving refunds. That does not change that I wish they would communicate better. They should have been upfront when they started having issues, not when they were so close to launching. This issue didn't just pop up. It must have already been happening in the background, but they choose not to say anything. It's the lack of communication that bothers me. The Korean players probably knew firsthand that there were issues, but I don't believe they ever released an official statement. They never addressed trying to help them or saying they didn't think they could help them. It was announced right before the delay/cancellation (for Korean). It's the constant last minute delays and not hearing anything until the last second that bother me. If they had said earlier that they would need to delay again, I would probably be less critical. The Korean fanbase has it the worst right now, but that does not mean the global fanbase isn't also dealing with the issue of lack of communication. That is the issue.

#❖ 🌗 anon #love letters ❤️#talkin' whb

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project-sekai-facts · 10 months ago

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thanks so much for the addition!! i hope you don't mind me adding your tags on ^^"

as someone who has played multiple other games in this sort of genre, prsk definitely is that game which has the most cnesorship by a mile. Like that parechu example from bandori honestly isn't that bad? I think the JP part for the second sentence is better, but EN made the I love you part honestly even more shippy than it was in the original text. And although I haven't played bandori for a long time now, I really don't recall them trying to work around every single usage of the word love or whatever like proseka does.

D4DJ doesn't really do it either, I can maybe think of a couple instances, but the fandom is very small so fan TLs and JP content is pretty hard to come by. Also it's literally like one or two poorly translated lines, you can very much still tell where there's romantic feelings written in because it's left in like 99% of the time. Maybe it's not the fairest comparison considering how explicitly queer D4DJ is, but still, proseka does have quite a bit of shiptease and sometimes outright subtext, and only occassionally does it actually make it to the EN server.

I have no clue why it's just proseka (i don't know enough about enstars to comment, i know there's issues with Arashi, but idk if there's any subtext between the boys that has been edited). Maybe they think it's too controversial or something? But come on, shipping is a big thing in idol game fan communities - worldwide - and especially the slash and femslash pairings are very popular and a big selling point. D4DJ literally got more popular after they added Hayate and Kokoa (who are canonically dating). Especially in online spaces (where y'know, the game gets free promotion via word of mouth) idol games are incredibly popular amongst queer people, a lot of people get into project sekai for things like that, and are incredibly unsubtle about it in twitter interactions, so it's... definitely a strange decision being made by staff.

Even weirder that An/Kohane content is rarely being altered (and maybe it's because some of their interactions can't be altered for various reasons, but also they're like, the only characters in the game to regularly get daisuki translated as i love you from what i remember). As a counter point to the an/kohane thing, me and some friends discussed that maybe they give them a pass because An is very affectionate and because of that then maybe it could be read in a platonic way when she says "i love you", but as a counter-counter point her relationship with kohane is outright described as them "seeing each other" in her Peak Excitement card story. It's... odd.

what's most surprising is that ensekai is definitely the highest budget out of the main idol games on the market rn. as far as i know, the en server is primarily operated by SoA, and I assume they're doing the translations because i don't think clpl has a branch for that and uh, why would they remove stuff they wrote in the first place? I dunno what sega's deal is either, considering some of their other franchises have queer characters. Obviously this game has a specific branch working on it, but you get my point - what the fuck sega?

i mean the en server is probably the most poorly managed of the bunch, which really. says something. censors aside, the translations can generally be pretty crappy. constant typos that never get fixed, even to the point of literally giving false information about a character and then contradicting that in the same sentence because they fucked half of it up. not to mention "that's showbiz baby" which you might remember if you've been here since launch, and also the fact the writers often struggle with rui's more poetic ways of speaking (good example here if you ignore the actual fact and just focus on the official vs fan TL). there was also the struggle with translating aibou in the earlier days too, which... might've been because they wanted to avoid the possible romantic connotations of the english word "partner". ensekai is just really poor for something presumably really high budget and something this popular.

i kinda steered away from my original point a bit there but ensekai just disappoints me a lot. there's always been censorship or otherwise "toning down" of queer subtext.

take this example from the mmj main story. admittedly "having feelings for someone" kinda makes this more shippy, but you'll never fucking guess what she says in the original text (suki. she says suki. "feelings" is a roundabout way of them saying "love"). like sure i could excuse the examples from the main story at the time because the translation was still Fine i guess, but it's at a point now where it's very obviously intentional. as you said, it's malicious, and it's erasure. sure the writing is ambiguous in the original version at times, but the fact that EN isn't even trying with the ambiguity and is just straight up getting rid of even vague things is, and i'm gonna fucking say it plainly, homophobia.

How are we feeling about ensekai’s emu3 translation!!! (I’m mad)

(if you remember the 3 whole posts i made when asahi got de-gayed on EN you'll know i am mad too and that this is probably going to get long)

i don't like to be too cynical but it was so obvious that they were going to change that line, i had a feeling since the event first released on JP and after the incident with Asahi where I went through and tracked down multiple other examples of EN removing queer subtext it became clear to me that in no way shape or form was "emu-chan really loves nene-chan" making it to EN without getting changed. what i didn't expect was them changing Nene's line after Luka's comment, which actually makes this whole situation far worse than many of their other instances of toning down queer subtext.

for anyone who isn't aware of what happened, in chapter 5 of the current Emu event, there's a scene where Nene, Rui and the Virtual Singers are talking about what would cheer Emu up. The vsingers all talk about how much Emu loves spending time with Nene, leading to the following exchange

If you look for them, any fan TL of this scene will be something similar to this:

Luka: ...Fufu. Emu-chan really loves Nene-chan, doesn't she? Nene: Th-that's nothing special...

EN's official translation is this:

So what's the issue? I'll start with Luka's part. In the original text, she uses the word daisuki, which can mean to "like a lot" or "love". It's a word you will see frequently in the idol/idol-adjacent genre of games, due to its ambiguity in that it can be read as either platonic or romantic when used towards a person, and often will be used in ambiguous situations so that it's harder to confirm the writers' intentions either way. so here, fans of the emu/nene ship could view the fact that emu loves spending her time with nene as more on the romantic side, but people who don't like the ship could view it as platonic and move on.

while they didn't translate daisuki directly, Luka's line still works, and still contains the ambiguity that works as ship tease in the original text. it's a perfectly fine localisation that still conveys the original intent. despite that, there is something to be said about EN's consistent refusal to translate daisuki as love in most instances when it's not used on An/Kohane (but then again, EN has literally teased An/Kohane on their twitter account so is it all that surprising?).

Here's some examples:

Aibou no koto ga daisuki de / he loves his partner -> he cares about his partner very much (The Power of Unity chapter 7 when Kaito is comparing Arata to Akito and Toya)

HARUKA-CHAN, DAISUKI DAYOOOO!!! / HARUKA-CHAN, I LOOOOOVEEE YOU!!! -> You're the best!!! (Dear Me, As I Was Back Then chapter 4 when minori is at an ASRUN concert. this one isn't actually that great of a localisation)

Honachan no koto daisuki dakara. Kore de iinda yo. / I love Honachan, so this is fine. -> I want what's best for her. And this is it. (Leo/need main story chapter 14 after Saki tells Honami she won't bother her anymore)

Minna daisuki de - taisetsuna tomodachi na no / I love them all - they're my dearest friends -> They're all amazing, and very dear to me. (Leo/need main story chapter 17. this isn't good either)

What's particularly amusing about that last one is that there's a second official translation for it that I assume was done by JP staff (since EN never promoted doing the Journey to Bloom subs like they did back when they provided subs for Petit SEKAI) that actually keeps the word daisuki as love.

Yeah. I love all my friends - and they mean the world to me.

It's a better localisation than the official EN team one.

Questionable localisation choices aside, Luka's line is fine and is actually in line with the original. The issue with this localisation very much lies with Nene's part, because that is an entirely new line.

In the original text, Nene's "that's just normal" or "that's nothing special" or however you choose to TL it, is meant to be her questioning Luka's statement, since all the things that the other vsingers said that Emu liked were pretty normal things like going shopping and playing video games with nene. To Nene, these things are normal activities for them to do together, so she gets embarrassed by the fact that Luka concludes from that information that Emu loves Nene. When I dissect it like that I think you can really tell what the writers were going for here lol.

"That's just us being friends" does still convey the idea that Nene thinks these activities aren't anything out of the ordinary and she isn't sure why the vsingers are picking these out as some of Emu's favorite things to do, but it's very different from the original line. "But those are just normal things we do together" is something I just came up with on the spot, but it's a lot closer to the original text and still conveys the same meaning. The fact they changed the line to "that's just us being friends" is, honestly, not even subtle that they're covering up queer subtext. The original scene was very clearly written in as ship tease, and EN mentioning "friends" for no reason, especially since the word nor anything close to it was not used in the original, is instantly a red flag because it's like the go-to for queerbaiting and censorship. This was intentional. There was no need for them to specify that the relationship is platonic, Luka's part is ambiguous for a reason so that fans can view it how they like.

Just to top all this off, here's Rin's original line just before that Luka+Nene interaction:

Oh, and! And! She said that playing games with Nene-chan is also super fun!

And here's Rin's line from the official EN translation:

That's not the same thing, but even more weirdly, the incorrect part (super fun->really loves) is a correct translation for the part changed in Luka's line. So, they can do it, they are willing to say "really loves", just not in the right places. Maybe because Rin's part is less personal than Luka's part? It's strange actually, this isn't the first time they've done this either. Off the top of my head I can think of an example from Shiho's Varied Kindness 2* story where they translated the word "suki" as really loves, despite that being much stronger than the original word used (and the fact that daisuki is used a lot in the Leo/need stories and it's incredibly rare if not entirely unknown for them to translate it correctly).

It's not subtle that they're trying to remove implications of the characters possibly being queer, they did it in curtain call and they did it in walk on and on, and multiple times before then too. And considering some of the content in this year's events and the amount of times they say daisuki alone, it's gonna keep happening. honestly i hate the fact that i keep trying to justify the translations in these posts. these translations are intentional. what happened in the curtain call translation back in october says enough. when a character who uses explicitly romantic language towards another guy passes as a straight character in the translation you know they're doing it on purpose.

oh and once again, it's only the EN server that has this issue. The scene in question was translated almost word-for-word on the TW and KR servers.

read fan translations. they're better than what EN gives us and people put a lot of effort into them.

#out of sheer spite for EN i'm probably just gonna start posting about every time they do a censor because i predict that it will happen #quite a lot this year considering some of the events and plot developments we've got coming up #i mean tbh i've covered the last two major censors (this and asahi) and then with the asahi one i went through loads of past ones #i don't really like breaking character this much and treating this like my personal account especially considering i want to be positive #about this game but ensekai's management genuinely frustrates me. i love this game a whole lot but i wish ensekai devs actually cared about #it as much as the fans #mod talks

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ursaminortarot · 3 years ago

Text

I’m really fixated on romance right now for some reason, so here we are with a soulmate reading. I’m of the belief that we don’t just have romantic soulmates but platonic and familial ones as well. However, for this reading, I am choosing to focus solely on romance.

I’m experimenting with a new format. I linked each of the readings to a google doc, this is mostly because they ended up being way longer than I’d anticipated (story of my life). I also thought that it might be more organized to do it this way. I’d appreciate feedback on whether or not I should keep doing it.

Piles to choose from:

Pile 1 - Cobra

Pile 2 - Fish

Pile 3 - Cheetah

Pile 4 - Zebra

Pile 5 - Hawk

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[Decks Used: Modern Witch Tarot, Wild Unknown Tarot, Wild Unknown Animal Spirit oracle, Tarot Cats, standard playing cards, and a homemade oracle deck]

This took me 10-11 hours to do, spread out across 3 days. So, if you can support my shop or donate I’d be grateful. Also, please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes and small incoherencies, by the time I got around to editing the readings I was kind of over it.

My Shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/UrsaMinorTarot

CashApp: @UrsaMinorTarot

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Pile 1: Cobra

Who They Are:

Queen of Wands, 9 of Wands, 8 of Pentacles, King of Clubs

10 of Cups, 7 of Cups r, Justice r, 5 of Hearts

7 of Cups r, 9 of Pentacles r, 6 of Wands, 9 of Diamonds

Death r, 7 of Wands r, 8 of Wands r, Ace of Spades

The High Priestess, The Fool, The Hanged Man r, Ace of Hearts

Mother of Cups r

Winter+New Love

I’m getting some self-made energy here, they are likely a very hard worker who puts in a lot of time and energy. Their success, while appreciated, makes them feel very alone. There’s a lot of wands energy here, so they are generous with their money and it’s possible that other people take advantage of that. The Mother of Cups reversed reinforces this idea as she brings the message: “you give too much of yourself to others”.

The High Priestess, Fool, and Hanged Man being pulled together makes me think they function in two very different ways. Either, they overthink literally everything to the point of never making a decision, or they just do things very impulsively without a second thought.

They want a big, happy family, whatever that means to them. It could involve having children or just having a lot of pets. However, due to past relationships, they no longer feel as though they could trust anyone enough to live out that dream.

They feel disillusioned with love, which gives them a lot of conflicting emotions. Because, again, there’s a lot of wands energy, so they’re a very passionate person. Their current belief that love isn’t real is a direct contradiction to who they are at their core. Winter and new love could be taken literally, like you’ll meet and fall in love with them in the winter. Or, if you wanted to look deeper at it, it could mean that you help them get out of this place of being unable to consider love.

How You Can Recognize Them:

8 of Cups r, Son of Wands, 7 of Wands r, King of Diamonds

5 of Pentacles, Father of Cups, 3 of Swords, Jack of Hearts

The Devil r, The Fool, The Devil, 2 of Spades

10 of Pentacles, The High Priestess r, Queen of Hearts

The Hermit, 7 of Pentacles r, 10 of Cups r, 7 of Diamonds

Hanged man, 4 of Cups r, 10 of Diamonds r

“You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions”

“You’re not seeing clearly”

This person has an unmistakable light about them. Being with them is like sitting outside on a nice day soaking up the sun. However, they are still holding on to the past, and this is to their detriment. When you meet them, if you haven’t already, they will be extremely hung up on their ex. They are going to be obsessing over what went wrong and whether or not they can fix it. I can’t tell if they want to fix it to get back together with their ex, because they think it will give them closure, or because they think it will help them avoid making the same mistakes in their next relationship. But, they also don’t actually want to fix anything because that would mean confronting their emotions and they would really rather not. They will likely seem to be existing outside of reality, they are going to be so distracted by this internal conflict that they aren’t going to notice the world around them.

In all honesty, they will be very difficult for you to recognize. You’ll probably notice them because of their light, but you won’t (and shouldn’t) consider them a potential partner - at least not until they’ve dealt with their issues and moved on. I want to stress that while they are so focused on their past relationship(s), that’s not all they have going on. They are a 3 dimensional human being like the rest of us, but this is just the information I was able to get.

I also want to mention that their family is very important to them, they’re the type of person to call or text each member of their immediate family every day. I also get the impression that you two will be friends for a while before getting into a relationship.

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Pile 2: Fish

Who They Are:

Queen of Swords, 9 of Wands, 9 of Cups r, The Tower r, Jack of Spades

King of Swords, Daughter of Wands, 3 of Pentacles, 8 of Diamonds

Judgment r, 2 of Cups r, Daughter of Swords r, The Chariot r, 3 of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Temperance, 7 of Wands, Jack of Hearts

The Emperor, 8 of Pentacles, The Magician r, Ace of Wands, 4 of Spades

“I’m sorry”

Best friends

Between the Emperor and having all of the court cards of the Swords suit, this person has a very powerful presence. They’re almost the kind of person that makes people stop and stare, I say almost because they’re intimidating and people don’t want to be caught staring. Not intimidating in a scary way, they just - and I can’t stress this enough - exude power. They are also very ambitious and highly intelligent. So when they put their mind to something, they will execute it perfectly. Or, at least, they want people to think it was done perfectly. They have a very “everything’s under control” look to them, but they’re barely hanging on by a thread. I feel like one bad day would send them into an existential spiral, because they don’t know who they are if they’re not perfect.

Nothing’s ever come easily to them and they’ve had to fight their whole life to get the things that they have now. They’ve never had the option of giving up. If they gave up, they were worthless, they were nothing - that’s how they’ve always seen it. I imagine there’s a lot of parental pressure at play here. It’s turned them into a workaholic, there’s no work-life balance to be found. I’m getting the impression that the “I’m sorry” card has to do with this aspect of their life.

The “best friends” card speaks for itself. With the Jack of Hearts and Daughter of Wands, there’s a playful energy to them. But these are the only cards pointing this out, which tells me that they restrain this part of themself. I think that you being their friend, as well as their partner, will show them that they don’t need to be so serious all the time. This is something buried so deep it’ll need some time and energy to be coaxed out of them.

This is pretty obvious, but this person’s biggest fear is failure.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Knight of Wands r, 4 of Wands r, 8 of Cups, 9 of Swords

King of Pentacles, The Moon r, 7 of Swords r, Queen of Spades

5 of Pentacles, Mother of Swords, Queen of Wands, 4 of Hearts

Queen of Cups, Daughter of Swords r, Knight of Wands

7 of Cups r, Son of Swords, 4 of Pentacle, 5 of Diamonds

The World r, 9 of Wands r, 8 of Hearts r

You feel as if you aren’t getting the recognition you deserve

Seperation

We’re definitely seeing their more sensitive, playful aspects. However, these are still vastly overpowered by their Swords energy as, once again, all the court cards are out - the Queen’s out twice. Seriously, this person has such powerful energy that it’s the first thing you notice.

I feel like you’ll meet either at work or at school, somewhere where you’re working on a group project together. The people you’re working with aren’t going to take your contributions seriously. But, once they realize you’re right, they’ll claim they were their ideas all along. The Swords family is very fair-minded, so I think this person’s going to have a problem with that.

They have this very detached, uninterested persona and once you’ve spent time around your soulmate, you’re going to pick up on the fact that they are deeper than they want people to think they are. When they’re more comfortable with you, which will take some time, you might catch glimpses of them being competitive/hot-headed or they’ll start making jokes around you. If you’re patient enough, they’ll eventually be vulnerable with you.

They have a fear of the unknown and love is foreign to them, so this is definitely a slow-burn.

In both of these readings I got a wave of pretty interesting energy. It wasn’t anxiety or dizziness, but felt similar to both. I felt like I lost my balance, that’s probably how you'll make this person feel. They have a lot of plans for life and you’re not one of them, so they’ll be thrown for a loop.

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Pile 3: Cheetah:

Who They Are:

Page of Swords r, Son of Cups, The Hierophant, 9 of Clubs

Page of Wands, Mother of Wands r, Page of Cups r, 4 of Hearts

9 of Cups, The Tower, 2 of Swords, 2 of Cups, Ace of Clubs

Queen of Wands r, The Chariot r, Queen of Pentacles, 4 of Spades

Knight of Pentacles, Ace of Wands, Emperor r, 6 of Clubs

8 of Cups, King of Wands

You can’t help everyone

Over-investment in work

Aries

The first thing that I’m seeing is that this person will probably have some self-esteem issues. It seems to be tied to their abilities more so than appearance.

They have a lot of ideas for projects that they want to work on, but they never seem to start anything, let alone finish. I think this is because they try to be everything to everyone and don’t prioritize themself. They find contentment in the idea that everybody likes them, but this can make them a people pleaser. This can lead to them taking on long hours at work to make their boss happy. It’s also unrealistic because there’s not a person on Earth that’s universally liked. I think this is something they’ll come to realize in their own time.

They may come across as indecisive at times, they aren’t. They always know exactly what they want, but can have a hard time asserting themself.

There’s a fire that burns bright here, this person has a lot of drive and ambition. This is where that aries energy comes in, they don’t have to have aries placements so please don’t get fixated on that. But, like I said before, they hold themself back by prioritizing other people and neglecting their own needs. They have the potential to be really successful, however they need to start putting themself first.

This seems like a very sensitive individual, just the thought of doing something under-handed stresses them out. Which is a good thing for other people, because your soulmate’s very charming and could probably talk themself out of anything.

For some reason I get the impression that they have a bit of a sweet tooth.

How You Can Recognize Them:

2 of Swords r, The Empress, Queen of Cups, 3 of Hearts

9 of Pentacles r, Judgment r, The Moon, 10 of Spades

The Fool, Mother of Wands r, Hierophant r, Jack of Diamonds

The Chariot r, The Hermit, 4 of Wands, Joker B&W r

3 of Pentacles, 4 of Wands r, Knight of Wands, 4 of Spades

King of Cups r, The Magician r

You’re having trouble getting in touch with your emotions

September

Think before you speak

Let’s start with the reinforcements of their self-esteem issues, as well as their people pleasing tendencies. It’s exhausting for them, emotionally and physically. They are well and truly holding themself back, and I think that by the time you meet them they’ll be starting to examine these aspects of themself. This will be something they struggle with for a while and there may be a period of time where they withdraw to think things through.

The joker in black and white in standard decks is my fool reversed card, but it’s reversed so its the fool reversed reversed. The fool upright, I feel like there could have been a simpler way for my cards to get that message to me. But I also feel like it represents the way your person talks to themself, they make everything just a little bit more complicated than it needs to be. They think in circles, eventually getting to the point but it may take them a while. This may be a contributing factor to their perceived indecisiveness.

They want to make a home with you. I get the impression that when talking about it with you, they’ll appear to be cool and collected. Like it’s not a big deal to them. But then they’ll turn around and shout it from the rooftops. It won’t be possible for people to not know you’re together, they’ll just be so loud about it.

Outside of the need to make everybody like them, they’re a pretty care-free individual. It will be important to them that you have fun together. I think this playfulness is their most defining feature and probably the first thing people notice about them.

In the first two piles, it looked like they’d be friends for a while before getting into a relationship with their person. That’s not the case here, like I said before, when this person knows, they know. They’re not going to waste time with you.

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Pile 4: Zebra

Who They Are:

The Fool, The Hanged Man, Queen of Swords, Ace of Clubs

6 of Swords r, 2 of Wands, The Hanged Man, Ace of Hearts

Ace of Cups, Mother of Pentacles r, 4 of Wands, Jack of Spades,

3 of Swords r, The Magician, 10 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups r, Jack of Diamonds

3 of Cups, The High Priestess, Strength, The Fool r, King of Spades

Soulmate

Hostile

May

The first thing I’m picking up on is that your soulmate is someone who is very carefree. They also have a lot of romantic energy to them, so they are definitely a hopeless romantic.

The amount of Major Arcana here tells me that this person is likely very spiritually gifted, they might not be consciously aware of this.

This person is kind of a go-getter. Once they decide they want something, nothing’s getting in their way.

There are some conflicting energies here because as happy and carefree as they are, there’s an equal amount of pain and hardship. This is someone who’s faced a lot of hostility, so at first will be fairly guarded. They love the idea of being in love, but have difficulties opening themself up to the reality of love. It’s not all bad, they are making an active effort to heal and not let past heartbreak hold them back.

With the Magician and High Priestess facing each other, this is someone who is likely very in touch with their spirituality. Not only are they able to trust their intuition, but they also have everything that they need to follow it. Once they have a gut feeling about something, whatever it is, they will trust it more than they’ll trust you, and be right 90% of the time.

They are very compassionate and probably are used to giving more than they take, which gets them taken advantage of. Part of their growth is going to be finding a balance in this aspect of their life.

This is someone who values family and most likely wants some kind of family unit, whether that be having children or pets.

The month of May might be important, it could be when you meet or one of you could be a Taurus or a Gemini.

How You Can Recognize Them:

Ace of Cups, 3 of Pentacles r, 8 of Wands, 2 of Swords

Page of Cups, Justice r, 5 of Cups, 7 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, 10 of Cups, Strength r, 2 of Diamonds

2 of Pentacles r, 9 of Cups r, Queen of Wands, King of Diamonds

Death, The Hierophant, Page of Wands, 9 of Spades

Sensitive

Peaceful

There’s still time to change your mind.

One of their prominent characteristics is their sensitivity. This doesn’t mean that they’re crybabies, they are just very mindful of everybody's feelings. This paired with what we learned about the painful parts of their past probably makes them a little insecure. This insecurity is only a problem when it comes to relationships. They may come across as very confident and flirty, but as soon as it moves past that they start clamming up and getting nervous. It could be bad enough that they have a hard time believing that you actually want to be with them.

They invest a lot of time into their projects, whether work related or personal. It’s likely that they struggle with finding a work-life balance. This is someone who needs to feel productive at every moment of the day. They keep themself busy so that they don’t need to be alone with their thoughts. This isn’t someone that knows peace. It is something they’d like to experience, but they don’t know how to. They have too many thoughts and can’t quiet their mind, their inner-demons get the best of them at times. This isn’t something they express outwardly though, everyone around them probably sees them as someone who, while busy, is fairly laid back. They need a lot of guidance here so if you’re someone who meditates, this could be something you help them with.

It’ll be easiest for you to recognize them based on their sensitivity and active lifestyle. They will be extremely helpful to their friends and family, and would drop everything to be there if needed. They are also, surprisingly down-to-earth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 5: Hawk

Who They Are:

5 of Cups, Judgment, Queen of Wands, Queen of Spades

Knight of Wands r, 10 of Wands r, 5 of Pentacles r, 3 of Diamonds

7 of Cups r, The Fool r, 10 of Pentacles, King of Spades

2 of Swords r, 9 of Cups, 3 of Cups r, 3 of Spades

The High Priestess r, 3 of Pentacles, Magician r, 9 of Diamonds

“You’re my everything.”

You need to hold yourself to more reasonable standards.

This is someone with a lot of pain, they are overwhelmed and feel defeated. I’m getting the impression that it has to do primarily with work/co-workers. It could be that they put a lot of themself into their work and seem to always get passed up for promotions, or they could have even been recently laid off. They’re very ambitious and intelligent, so if they did get laid off, it would be a big hit to their ego. Alternatively, they could have almost reached a long-standing dream, only for it to fall apart at the last second.

Your soulmate has a lot of fiery passion that they don’t always know what to do with, so they turn everything into a competition. The thing is, they’re only competing with themself. They’re always trying to be better than they were yesterday, even when it’s unrealistic.

As passionate as they are, they can be very patient when it comes to getting what they want. They know that not everything can be rushed, even if that’s frustrating to them. They try to avoid making reckless mistakes, but sometimes this can lead to them not making decisions in a timely manner.

They value family and friends greatly, this could be the most important part of their life to them. They’ll test you to see if you can gain the approval of their loved ones. If you don’t, they may begin to have second thoughts. This is a soulmate though, so you’ll likely be very compatible and win everyone over with relative ease.

How You Can Recognize Them:

5 of Pentacles, The Moon, 4 of Swords, 5 of Clubs

King of Pentacles, Judgment, 5 of Swords r, King of Wands r, 7 of Diamonds

2 of Swords r, Daughter of Pentacles, 5 of Pentacles r, 3 of Clubs

Temperance r, Son of Wands r, High Priestess r, 7 of Swords r, Jack of Clubs

6 of Swords r, The Tower r, Page of Pentacles r, 5 of Hearts

You are not seeing clearly

Hesitant

When You meet this person, they will be coming out of a very rough period of their life. They are going to be at the start of their healing journey and they won’t have a lot of time or energy for romance. They’re likely very hard on themself, they don’t want to be seen as weak so they don’t express negative emotions. This is something they have to confront in order to heal.

They are going to be in a complicated headspace, there’s going to be difficulty separating the past from the present, and there’s not a lot of balance between their spiritual and physical lives. They either reject the spiritual to embrace the material world, or neglect their physical well-being and focus solely on their spiritual self.

You know how some people use their trauma as an excuse to inflict pain on others? This person’s the opposite of that, everything they’ve gone through has made them a patient, compassionate person. This will probably be one of the first things you notice about them, how kind they are. They are also very dependable, they’ve experienced going through hard times alone and don’t want anyone else to feel like they have to.

Overall, they come across as a very good human being, but there’s an underlying tiredness to them. They might be dealing with a little bit of brain fog, so at times they’re slow to process the world around them.

#tarot #tarot reader #tarot reading #tarot pick a card #tarot decks #tarot cards #tarotblr #oracle decks #oracle cards

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toranekooo · 3 years ago

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gonna be vv dramatic for five seconds and tell yall the real reason i was so eager to make the resource post

its because. when i started up i literally knew no one in the community on a personal level and i spent so much of my time watching them from afar. so a lot of my first few...days? weeks? were spent trying to figure out a brand (?) of sorts for myself, i stated this in the post but yeah, from personal experience, the start up can and will be slow. it was a little horrific and i wanted to interact with more people, but it was so so scary because i entered during a big discourse phase (funny thing, i've gone through four discourse phases now and only involved myself mildly in one) and. during that time a lot of editors were apprehensive of each other which was, of course, scary. i won't say what phase it was but yeah. anyway, time passed and this and that occurred, one of the editors that inspired me to start my blog deactivated bc of the discourse and yk, sad cat noises ig. anyway that was a time. im still shocked i actually stuck through but yeah, reqs were slow and my editing style was bad (in my eyes, at least) so i kept going and making edits for literally everything i could think of. and then in the next, whaddaya know, my small list of edit software grew and grew bc i attempted to gather all of it in a way that would least inconvenience anyone, i. wanted to collect it bc i was so absolutely terrified of talking to other people and asking for help or thoughts bc i imagined i'd look creepy and. next thing i knew i had people asking me for advice. ME. i collected all that stuff bc i was so fucking terrified of being a nuisance to anyone and everyone i have ever talked to in my life. but yeah not knowing how to get one thing causes so much trouble bc there were times i made transparents by hand instead of using remove.bg, there were times i hunted down high quality images bc i knew nothing of where to get them. and yeah it was hell walking and so so exhausting. there was also the absolute hell that was trying to find my own style so yk. it was a lot. but as always, the days went by and everything got better for the most part.

anyway, i penned this because i wanted you all to understand that the reasons i made that thing. bc i know it's hard to ask for help, i know it's hard to find what you need, and although i can't guarantee i'll always be here, as long as that post circulates, i know at least that it'll be helpful to people even for times when i'll say goodbye to this blog too.

the editing community isn't perfect. neither are its editors. and if you think it was easy for me to make and gather all that shit, i kid you not, it was like trying to gather every word with the letter E on the english alphabet. and i didn't fix everything about the post and myself overnight. it was hard, trying to part with the idea that my editing was "bad" because it wasnt this or that. it was hard trying to understand aesthetics and being constantly afraid someone will point out you got it wrong. it is hard, in ways you can't even imagine, contemplating whether or not to post the edit or let self-hate eat me up for every little thing about it. and if you see me now, you'd know i'm still like that a lot. but i love my edits. and i love this community. anyway.

the whole post is dedicated to every single one of you editors who are so incredibly awesome for persevering despite burn out, irl issues, and literally every fucking thing in the world. everything about editing is never as easy as it seems, and if i managed to help you in even the smallest ways, im happy with that.

#feel free to reply. dont rb.#୨୧ * mio speaking #watch this make zero sense #it's long everyone look away #i just. needed to pour my thoughts out on this lol

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minghaocouture · 4 years ago

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Pairing: Lee Jihoon x Fem!Reader Genre: Collage AU, Fluff, the tiniest angst Warning: Minor self esteem issues (from reader), Language WC: 2.9K

A/N: @woozisnoots my sweetie baby! This is your Holiday gift from me!! I wub yoooou and i hope you like this <333 The song mentioned in the fic is Tell me you love me by Bolbbalgan4 and i actually just kept listening to it on repeat while writing this lol, it’s such a cute song, and all the italic words are song lyrics (the english translations)! Also yes i shamelessly name dropped our friend group in this, don’t judge me

“You don’t accept my hi as usual I know you’re popular and handsome but you’ve always given the cold shoulder Only to me.”

The lyrics flowed easily from your lips and into the microphone, eyes closed as you felt the vibes of the chorus and attempted to put the right layers of emotion into the song as you did so. The instrumental paused just as the chorus ended you heard the familiar sound of your partner through the headphones.

“Can you run that one more time. Hold that last note a bit longer, and make the staccato in the first beginning a bit sharper.” On the other side of the glass sat Lee Jihoon, and the brains behind the operation despite this being a partnered project. At the beginning of this, you never would have thought that the two of you would have been working together so well. Not with how the project began.

You gave him an affirmation of your understanding and he began from the end of the pre-chorus, letting the melody and his test vocals fill your ears just before you began again.

When you had first been assigned partners, you were less than enthused. Sure, you had a major crush on Jihoon, his passion for music inspired you and you always loved watching him in class when he would perform. But, he was notoriously a rather critical partner. During the last partnered project in class a close friend of yours, Binu, had been assigned to work with him. She ended up confessing that she didn’t really get too much of a say on anything and that Jihoon did the project mostly by himself. Needless to say, she was much happier with this project being partnered with your mutual friend Mar.

The recording session wrapped up nicely and you began packing your things as you realized how late it was in the evening and your friends would start to get concerned if they didn’t hear back from you. So you pulled your phone from your bag and quickly messaged your group chat to let them know the situation. As you went to place your bag over your shoulder you heard the familiar sound of a stomach growling.

Your eyes quickly scanned the room and watched Jihoon sigh and sit back down at the recording booth, his laptop still open but he didn’t look like he had any intention of leaving to get sustenance. Much to your own surprise you decided to speak up.

“Hey, I was planning on grabbing some dinner. Did...you wanna come too? We’ve been here for a while and we could probably use some food.” You suggested, an inviting smile plastered itself onto your face. You hoped it didn’t seem fake, after all you had invited Jihoon to eat before and he had always denied the offer.

Much like all previous times, you saw his rather small head shake in denial.

“Nah, I’ve got some stuff to finish up here. I’ll probably grab something before heading back to my dorms...or maybe I’ll ask Mingyu to pick me up some dinner.” You’d heard about Mingyu before, his roommate who he says he tolerates but you can tell that he does really care about the guy from how he talks about it.

Most people say that Jihoon is hard to read and closed off, but you know they’re wrong. He just...emotes differently, he has his own ways of showing affection and you can see it in his eyes and the little things he does and says. Being around him like this has honestly only made your crush worse.

“Well, alright, but you better eat something and go home tonight. I don’t wanna come back here tomorrow and see you in this same outfit cause you haven’t gone home.” Which...had happened on more than one occasion during this project.

He shrugged, not turning back to face you.

“I brought extra clothes this time.”

***

“Seriously? I can’t believe he said no again! Ugh, I hate him and you deserve better than to pine after that short stack!” Rolling your eyes as you listened to Krys ranting once again.

Since Jihoon refuted your invitation you decided to invite out your best friends. The 5 of you heading to a nearby fried chicken place, crowding into the booth that your friend group had basically claimed (when it was available at least)

“It’s fine Krys, he’s just really into his work. He’s probably going to be in the studio editing until all hours of the morning.” You explained before shoving some of the complimentary salad into your mouth as you took a break from the chicken itself. “I might even take him some food before I head back to the dorms.”

“Nu-uh! I’m not letting you! That boy doesn’t even talk to you outside of class, he doesn’t deserve your time or your energy!” Krys exclaimed.

“I mean, he kinda does. Talk to her, I mean he waved at her last week.” Maya brought up in between her unsuccessful attempts at stealing the rest of the table’s pickled radish. “We were walking to the lounge and she saw him and waved at him, and he finally waved back.”

“Oh what, after ignoring her for a whole semester? Real nice of him. My best friend deserves better!” She declared, aggressively taking another bite of her chicken before continuing. “If I weren’t already dating the best man in the whole world, I would just date you myself.”

This brought the rest of the table another fit of laughter. It was never a dull moment in your friend group and you were always grateful that you had them in your life.

“This just in, Krys won’t leave big dick Wonwoo so her best friend can have a good relationship.” Mar joked, cackling at the thought. The laughter seemed to get worse when she realized that Wonwoo himself had just walked up to the table to set down a drink refill for Binu. The male’s face was flushed red, obviously having heard the conversation. Which prompted another round of joyful laughter from the group.

It was a good night, but your mind still drifted back to Jihoon, who was most likely still sitting alone in the studio, hungry yet still hard at work. As the conversation drifted away from you finally, you got Wonwoo’s attention and ordered a small meal for take out with a plan to deliver the food before returning home. Even if Krys would give you shit for it.

***

“Jihoon, it’s me” You knocked on the studio door as you entered, assuming you wouldn’t be interrupting anything since you saw the light on but heard now sounds from inside. Surprisingly, or rather unsurprisingly, you got no response as you entered. Simply making your way in despite any acknowledgement.

The more surprising thing was what you found once you entered. There, still sitting in the rolly chair with his head firmly planted on the desk in front of his work laptop was Lee Jihoon. Fast asleep, small snores leaving his frame as he dreamed. It would honestly be pretty cute if it weren’t for the fact that you knew this was probably happening because of how much he overworked himself.

You let out a small sigh, placing the bag on the small coffee table in the room (you didn’t want to set it on the desk with all the equipment) and grabbed his jacket that he had tossed onto the nearby sofa before draping it over his shoulders. You couldn’t really do much more for him without lifting the male up and transferring him to the couch, and you were pretty sure he would wake up if you even attempted that.

“Night Jihoon.” With that final goodbye you exited the room and returned back to your dorm to get some homework done for a few of your other classes.

It was about 2:30 the next morning when your phone vibrated, indicating a message. Sparing a glance to the device you read the familiar name ‘Lee Jihoon’ as the sender. The message was no more than a simple “Thank you.” but that was good enough for you.

***

As you expected, even being the harmony vocals for the song Jihoon’s talent far outshined your main vocals. You weren’t upset or anything, but you were definitely starting to regret letting him talk you into the main vocal position for this project. You didn’t even really have any commentary to or feedback to give him. His voice fit the song perfectly and you could feel the emotion in his words as he sang.

When he exited the booth and took a seat on the sofa to take a break you spoke up.

“Are you sure you shouldn’t be the one leading the song?” You questioned, head tilted to the side a bit as you watched him gulp down a bottle of water. Your words took him off guard and he fixed you with a rather confused look, so you continued. “I mean, you have such a great voice and I really think you capture the emotion in the song better than I do. So like…”

“What are you talking about?” He cut off your ramblings before you could continue, his eyes staring intently into your own. “You have an amazing voice, I’m literally blown away anytime you step into the booth. It’s part of the reason I was glad we got partnered for this project.”

It was almost as if your brain had short circuited, you didn’t know what to say. He had never spoken about your singing like that before, much less admit that he was...glad you were his partner. A part of you worried that he was lying just to spare your feelings, but the logical part knew that Jihoon wasn’t someone who would waste the energy to do that.

“Let me put it this way,” he began again. “If I didn’t think you were doing a good job, if i thought your vocals would get us points docked off, then I wouldn’t have let you sing the Main. Got it?” His gaze seemed to pierce right to your very soul and you couldn’t find it in yourself to argue back and decided to just take his word for it. So you simply nodded a response.

It seemed that Jihoon wasn’t done surprising you tonight, as a smile so tender made its way onto his face. Your heart skipped a beat as you looked into his eyes, you could feel the heat rushing to your face and you prayed that he couldn’t hear the loud throbbing of your heart as he watched you.

The moment was soon broken by the loud blaring of a familiar pop song, Jihoon’s face dropping at the sound. He quickly grabbed his phone off of the coffee table and put it up to his ear. You decided to be polite and at least try not to listen in, pulling out your own phone and messaging the group chat to see what was up.

“What do you want, Mingyu?” He began, definitely sounding more irritated than before he had taken the call. You couldn’t hear the voice on the other end but from the gumbling that left Jihoon’s lips you wouldn’t have been surprised if his roommate was pushing his buttons for whatever reason.

“No. I’m not and you need to stop asking. I’m working right now.” He paused for a moment, his voice lowering to almost a whisper as if that would make you unable to hear him. “Yes, she’s here too, so stop asking. Mingy-” He groaned as the male on the other end seemed to cut him off, you weren’t too sure with what but now you could vaguely hear the loud voice of his roommate on the line and couldn’t help laughing softly. The sound causing Jihoon’s eyes to flicker over to you, causing your heart to skip a beat as you quickly tried to make it seem like you were just laughing at something on your phone.

“Shut it. We’ll talk when I get home...yes i’m coming back tonight!” With an irritated sigh, Jihoon ended the call. You weren’t sure he gave Mingyu any time to give a farewell but if you were being honest the conversation had been pretty amusing.

Setting his phone down on the couch, Jihoon let out a sigh and ran a hand through his thick black locks. A silence falling over the two of you as you typed away on your phone, trying not to make eye contact again. You were so engrossed with your act you didn’t even hear when Jihoon stood from the couch and made his way over to the chair you were currently occupying.

“Before we call it, could you re-record from the bridge to the end. When I was editing it last night there was some feedback so I wanted to get a better recording.”

“Oh, um yeah sure!” You weren’t sure why he hadn’t mentioned that before, and you didn’t recall hearing any feedback from your vocals when he was recording. But still, you took him at his word and entered the small recording booth once again.

“I’ll start from just before the bridge.” He said over the speakers once your headphones were pulled snuggly over your ears. You cleared your throat and took a deep breath before nodding and signaling him to start.

“I really like you a lot But do you think we can’t be together? I feel small in my school uniform skirt Looking big on me, Yeah The tall, pretty girls are all around you. Oh whoa~”

Getting through the bridge you poured your emotions into it. Thinking about your feelings for Jihoon and the longing for him to feel the same for you. Honestly, through this whole process the song the two of you had written was so...cathartic for you. Expressing things you never verbalized, how despite your attempts Jihoon never really spoke to you outside of class but he always seemed so kind when you were working. Or how, because of his looks and his talent he seemed to be surrounded by girls who thought he was wonderful.

“If you like me, or you love me Just say yes, yes, yes And then I’m your girlfriend And your my boyfriend Tell me you like me.”

The last few chords streamed through your headphones and a silence fell over the room. Just as you were about to take the headphones off you heard a voice come through, the familiar voice of your partner and crush.

“I like you...a lot.”

You froze like a deer in headlights, almost positive that you had misheard him. Eyes quickly landing on him, watching him through the glass. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but through the tint you could see the soft pink dusting his cheeks and the tips of his ears as his eyes stared down at the desk.

“Don’t say anything. I just...wanted to let you know. The reason I didn’t want to sing the main vocals is because I was worried you would be able to tell.” He continued, eyes still not lifting from the table to meet your gaze. “All of the lyrics I added were about you. I just...changed the pronouns.”

It was unbelievable to think that Lee Jihoon could possibly love you back. He was too...wonderful, and the fact that the both of you had used this song to express those feelings was almost unreal.

Thinking back on it, on all the interactions you had attempted to have with him outside of class. You realized that he wasn’t ignoring you, his eyes had always met your own but he was just uncertain. He had lacked the confidence to speak to you despite your obvious interest in him. It made your pinning seem silly now.

You still honored his wishes and said nothing, simply taking the headphones off and draping them onto the music stand before exiting the booth. Stopping right next to the object of your affections.

“Jihoon, look at me? Please?” Hesitantly, his gaze turned to you and he looked flustered, more flustered than you had ever seen him. “I like you too, a whole lot.”

Your words had his eyes lighting up, a look of disbelief crossing his face as you continued.

“Could I...would it be alright if I kiss you?” Before today, you had only ever imagined kissing Jihoon. What it would be like had been nothing more than a small fantasy that you thought about, but seeing him nod looking away still flustered, it almost seemed to good to be anything more than a dream.

Hesitantly, you reached out a hand to caress his cheek, your heart speeding up as he lifted a hand to press over your own. When your lips met, it was like the stars had aligned.

It wasn’t a perfect kiss, it was shy and soft but the emotion you felt simply from his lips pressing back against your own was enough to cause your heart to soar. It was like two puzzle pieces finding one another how well his lips felt against your own. You decided in that moment that he would get to hear everyday how much you absolutely loved him, he would never need to ask or hesitate again. Cause that’s what kind of love you wanted to give him, and all you needed to do was say it.

#caratwritersclub #kdiarynet #kdiner #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagine #seventeen scenario #svt x reader #svt imagine #svt scenario #woozi x reader #woozi imagine #woozi scenario #jihoon x reader #jihoon imagine #jihoon scenario

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demenior · 3 years ago

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Dem’s Big Post About The Spn Fics Part 1/2

aka The Wrap Up to celebrate To Exist Again and To Become a Man now being finished!

(This will be a long post. This is your only warning.)

Admittedly this is a bit of a weird thing to be doing, but I wanted to try it out for 3 reasons:

I love talking about my own work and

It functions really well as a self-reflective tool for me to improve on, and

I can answer some big questions people might have because there was a LOT of worldbuilding in these stories.

We’ll start off with reflective stuff, and move into the juicier world-building focused stuff later into the post. There will be major spoilers for both fics to come!

To begin with a funny anecdote, Why Did I Write These Stories?

I was beginning to write and work out the story that I wanted to write for Spn (what will now be To Destroy a Man. As I was writing the scene, I realized I had a LOT of ideas and while I was trying to avoid as much exposition as I could, it became quickly apparent that I was needing to create my own au (this scene eventually became chapter 34 of To Become a Man). A short prequel seemed like a good idea, to quickly hash out the ‘prior’ events that I needed to go through so all the readers could be on the same page. While plotting out prequel points, I realized Sam and Dean were going to have drastically different experiences during the same time period, and I was trying to figure out who’s pov would be better for which scenes, and how to keep momentum when they’re going through such radically different types of changes. Ultimately I decided to split their povs, which I also thought would be a fun project! And I naively assumed each pov would take about 2 chapters each, rounding out to maybe 15k total.

I had my ending points: Dean n Cas soul-merged and (basically) married, Cas on the lam from heaven and a complete anomaly, and Sam juiced up full of powers and a weird mix of archangel and antichrist but still 100% human and ready to fight God.

Now I needed to add weight to these changes, so I wrote 200k of build-up.

Am I proud of these fics?

OF COURSE I AM!!! These are the longest fics I’ve ever written AND finished AND in the fastest freakin turnaround ever (both were finished writing, barring edits, in like 6 months holy shit)

I didn’t write a single scene that I “didn’t” want to write. If I had trouble writing it, as in it was fighting me, I scrapped it. Most obviously was the scene in Dean’s pov where he and Sam were intended to meet some other hunters and Dean declines working with them because he’s nervous about being outed as queer. It was meant to be a good scene! I wanted to introduce some new characters! But it just wasn’t working so I said ‘thank you, next!’.

But it means this story was an absolute joy to write. Because for a while all I was doing was ‘if I wanted to write one scene into supernatural, what would I write?’ and then just DID that!! It’s why there’s a lot of ‘Salmondean do dumb shit or have really dumb heartfelt conversations’ scenes.

Would I change anything?

If I’d been less eager to start sharing, I might have planned out the story beats a little tighter so there were less ‘soft’ chapters and a draw/pull for people to come back and keep reading. I felt Dean’s story specifically lagged at points and could have used some tighter editing (there was a noticeable lull in directed movement between Dean n Cas getting together, until Sam corrupts Amy).

I also probably would have held Sam’s story until I’d finished Dean’s so I could make the two line up better! Probably could have inserted more scenes into Sam’s fic that way, and made sure things were a little more consistent. In an ideal world one concept I had was to release 1 chapter from each pov every week that would correspond to the same time frame so we’d be getting real-time SalmonDean pov narrative. Unfortunately that didn’t work!

The biggest takeaway overall is for me to focus more on what moves the plot, and to make my scenes do more than 1 thing so I can cut down on wordcount and increase my efficiency.

Of course every writer will find things they want to fix in anything they’ve ever written, so these are minor “mistakes” at best. I’m so dang proud of these fics.

Onto more interesting things!

How Did I Put These Fics Together (because it’s different than anything I’ve ever done before)

Normally when I write a story, I plan out the beats I need to hit, see where I need to insert any kind of foreshadowing/buildup, and then write from A to B to C and so on and so forth. Hence, this is why I can normally post things as I complete chapters, because it’s all a linear progression.

For these two stories, rather than linear plot/a normal story structure, I just sat and free-wrote any and every scene that came to mind and then pieced them into a kinda-linear form like putting a quilt together. You’ll note that this is why there’s not a lot of internal callback or a feeling of sense of time flowing within the fic (save for points where I went back and specifically edited it in). How long does the story take place over? Hard to say! Your author has the barest grasp on linear time even on a good day (how many times did I say ‘see you on [wrong day]’ at the end of chapters lmaaoooo)

This also meant EXTENSIVE editing on the back end once I decided in what order I wanted my ‘quilt pieces’ to be. Hard to say if this is a bonus or a negative!

But I did want to try and capture the vibe of the lives they lead, as a bit of a ‘slice of life’-style story, when the slice of life is the profound weirdness of the Winchester roaming life, and how things are status quo- until everyone almost dies oh shit!! And then they have to keep living because no therapy we die/undie like Winchesters. Do I think I captured this effectively? Hmm. Good question.

Dem where the FUCK did the inspiration for a lot of the magic and creature weirdness even come from?

Honestly? Music, primarily. And completely mishearing lyrics!

Nightwish ‘Ever Dream’: the line is ‘my song can but borrow you grace’ and because my brain is scrambled eggs on a good day, I heard ‘grace’ ‘song’ and ‘borrow’ in that order and have had, for YEARS, the mental image of Cas borrowing Dean’s soul to power himself up for battle.

From there I’ve always been enamored with the ‘wavelength of celestial intent’ descriptor that Cas drops in s6 for “what he is”.

I also really like ocean metaphors mostly because I’ve been obsessed with the ocean and things in it since I was like… 5??? So really this was me just rolling with what I know lmao. I love using (somewhat) accurate scientific metaphors for very intangible things!

I was also finishing my degree in biology/ecology while writing these fics and I think it shows

Stars ‘The Night Starts Here’ gives us the series title and the fic titles. Except for ‘To Exist Again’. TEA was almost titled ‘The Upwards Fall’ because I wanted all 3 of the Main Stories to have titles from this song, but I couldn’t make anything else work in tandem with the series name ‘The Love It Takes’ while also working for Sam’s personal story. So Sam, as always, is the rebel <3

Stars ‘Up In Our Bedroom, After The War’ is basically the vibes of the whole story. TFW has been, literally, to hell and back!!! There’s a bit of melancholy and sadness, a lingering dark, but the chance of a bright new tomorrow and a soft start.

Let’s Talk About Themes in The Story! What were you looking to accomplish?

My earliest notes for TFW are, as follows:

Dean’s journey of self-discovery (who am I when I’m not trying to be Dad?)

Dean wants to settle down! He wants a big family! He wants to be domestic!

Basically: Dean doesn’t want to have a short life of hunting. He wants to live!

Dean’s journey of realizing he’s bi, and him accepting that

Dean’s relationship to Sam is both older brother/parent

And continuing Dean balancing these roles while also letting Sam be an adult

Dean’s Big Issues/Fears about never being good enough for people to want to stay with him (these are effectively highlighted in that Cas thinks he’s not useful enough to be wanted)

Sub Plot:

Castiel’s autonomy

Cas’ fall from grace, to trying to restore Heaven, to wrecking it further

He’s majorly depressed by the end of s7 (before purgatory)

Wants to stay in Purgatory but doesn’t tell Dean

Remains depressed after leaving, but resolved to keep living on because he’s clearly meant for something

After the seraphim reveal: does he have free will?! How does he grapple with this? How does he live in a way he can be proud of?

And lastly

Sam gets his powers back CAUSE THATS HOT

where tf did they go????

he got them from Lucifer?????

sleeper agent??????

Sam is The Chosen One

Accepts that he is More Than Human and to celebrate all parts of him

Lucifer and Sam friends?? Work together????

Sam needs autonomy in his choices/his life

If you compare these to the overall arc of TFW within the two stories, I think I got a lot of them! But you’ll also note a lot of these things aren’t concrete goals that are easily measurable (ex: Dean wants to learn to bake pie. In chapter 1 he starts a fire in the kitchen. By the end of the story he finally makes A Good Pie.) part of the lack of concrete milestones was why I felt it was important to tell Dean (and Cas’) story by going back to the point they meet, in s4! Dean’s gradual change towards his feelings for Cas, his relationship to Sam (heavily influenced by the s7 events of this fic) and then his own relationship with himself were such slow burns that I felt it would be a disservice to try and cram a change like that into a timeline like “1 year”.

I felt like these subtle changes and adjustments actually felt a lot truer to life-- people often change in very small, gradual ways over time, even without realizing it and often times not consistently! If only we could all gain skills like the sims, where we can easily level up and remain at that high level of performance!

So the Guy Who Ate Satan, A Celestial Nuke that Developed Sentience, and Dean walk into a bar…

Sam’s story in Spn The Show has always been a ‘chosen one’ kind of narrative. Sam is living with one foot in the realm of the monsters, and I wanted to bring that back full force! It really makes sense for him that he should only continue to grow in power, might, and magic!! As the story progresses.

Cas also got a power up! I do desperately love in the show that he was kind of a grunt/nothing angel, and so even when he defected to TFW he was a huge help for them, but in the scale of things he was an annoying fly to most other angels. It really worked for the underdog story of s4/5. In this I wanted to give him a power up, and originally it was actually going to be close contact with Sam that eventually changed Cas into something unknown (you can still see traces of this in ch34 of TBAM, where Death remarks ‘Castiel could be [Sam’s] first creation’. But for a combo of reasons: how Sam’s magic needed to have intent, the entire concept of free will and consent, and how much I wanted Dean and Cas to have their effect on each other, I decided to go with the route that Cas has actually always been something angel-adjacent rather than becoming something new. TFW/Supernatural has always been about free will and making your own story, so I amplified that with Cas.

Dean has always been A Normal Guy, which is part of the appeal of him and Sam (2 normal dudes!) taking on the Very Not Normal. As explained above, Sam’s story is ‘normal guy finds out he’s the chosen one’ and so, in a story about very large concepts and huge monsters and acts of magic, I felt it was very important to keep Dean as normal as possible. To the point it became a running gag to me, personally, in that ‘no matter what cool shit happens around him, Dean has to stay as Just A Guy’. And it’s a very humanizing role that allows the story to have the scale it does!

What were the most important themes in your story?

Sam’s Autonomy

I wasn’t even going to include the plot about Lucifer’s death in this story— that was going to come up in a later story, actually! And rather than Sam having ate Lucifer, the original idea was that they’d become a SamandLucifer entity (this harkens back to a concept I wanted to write when Swan Song first aired).

That storyline would have involved a lot of mental ‘Sam and Lucifer discuss what it means to live, which one of them is more worthy of life and if they do deserve to destroy the world for the pain they’ve been forced to go through, just to create the dichotomy of good and evil for everyone else’ discussions. There would be a lot of talk about how Sam hates and fears Lucifer for the pain Lucifer put on Sam, how Lucifer hates Sam because he and Sam are the same but Sam’s brother loves him anyways, etc.

Ultimately that was scrapped because Sam’s entire story in the show is always about how the world and everyone around him manipulates him and that he never actually gets to make choices about his own life or body that aren’t influenced or part of someone elses’ design. And that always bothered me that Sam was never allowed to be himself without having to be ashamed of it, and I wanted to make sure that Sam’s triumph of being proud of himself/proudly choosing to exist (again) was evident in his story

In the end I needed Sam to have this visceral win over his tormentor. As the story shows, in this case Lucifer was abused and put into a position where he was incapable of empathy and could only express himself in violence. Sam even understands this! But it doesn’t change the fact that Lucifer tortured Sam in unimaginable ways for thousands of years.

With that in mind I didn’t like the idea of Lucifer and Sam having “co-ownership” of their new identity, so I made the choice that Sam had to be the survivor. This tied in well with Sam’s new crusade to restore free will to the universe, because he’s breaking the narrative of his own story!

While Castiel wasn’t a pov character, his own autonomy and free will was equally as important. You’ll note that many, many paragraphs and conversations revolved around that theme and that in the end Cas followed himself (and love!) which ensured his freedom of self <3

The Brothers are WEIRD PEOPLE!!!! And Codependent to a Worrying Degree, but It’s Also How They Survive

It’s very hard to show “unusual” relationships when you’re writing from the pov of the two people who don’t think there’s anything weird about their relationship. Sure, they say ‘yeah it’s probably weird that we still share a bed’ but that’s kinda more in line with ‘I had a nightmare and I want to be close to the person who makes me feel safe’. Hashtag normalize co-sleeping when you need it!!!

From there I did try to point out how the boys have a weird perception of lifestyle in the little things they did.

From thrifting everything from clothes to appliances to books (thrifting is a valid lifestyle! It’s incredibly handy when you’re on a budget.)

To never actually having condiments or knowing how to use a dishwasher cause they’ve lived in a car, a motel room, or squatted in old houses their whole life.

I tried to have them wear each others’ clothes or casually swap things as much as possible. They live out of each others’ pockets!

Also the brothers are just weird people!! It’s hard to show from their pov, cause they don’t know how far off from normal they are, but like…

Everything about Sam and Amelia was NOT right like holy shit those two were wilding in their grief. They are very lucky things worked out for them and that they got to be hashtag Weird Girls together

Dean explicitly, in the story, gets horny after killing stuff!! Violence has done a number on his psyche and he’s gotten some wires crossed that maybe shouldn’t have been, or maybe could be worked out in a safe space but… uh… how likely do we think Dean is gonna go find a safe space to deal with any of his shit???

LOVE!!! Love is truly what this whole story is all about

If you’ve read the stories, you know how much emphasis I put on love. Love is the strongest force in the Spn Universe! It’s what averted the apocalypse and saved the world (Swan Song), it’s what created free will (Cas’ entire arc!) I love love!!!!

I went out of my way to not put any definitions on platonic love vs romantic love because I think love is love is love and how you express that is the difference. Neither is more powerful than the other because LOVE is powerful!! Sam and Cas are the most important people in Dean’s life and he loves them equally! He shows this by giving Cas kisses and stealing Sam’s socks.

It’s a personal pet peeve of mine when I have to hear explanations like ‘I love you, like a brother’ or ‘I love you, but like, as a friend because I’m a lesbian and you’re a man’ etc etc in media. If you have to continuously define how your characters love each other, then I don’t think you’re doing a good job of portraying their relationship. So you’ll see that I never put those parameters in any conversation. Dean DOES muse that he loves Cas differently than he loves Sam or Bobby, specifically because there is a romantic and sexual tone that his feelings for Cas takes, but not because he loves Cas more or less than he loves Sam or Bobby.

Which means, if you haven’t realized it yet, the Series + Fic Titles are meant to be a complete sentence because the power of love IS the thesis of this series:

The Love It Takes To Exist Again (Sam’s journey!)

The Love It Takes To Become a Man (Dean’s journey!)

The Love It Takes To Destroy a Man (TBA)

And now for fun stuff. Behind the scenes!!

What’s Something People Probably Don’t Know?

The demonic fungal/hydrothermal vent growth on Sam’s arm was thrown in literally as I was posting the chapter because I had just finished a 48 hour cram session of writing a report on tube worms for an ecology class (I was chanting my tube worm song as I wrote it) and it ended up being a HUGE hit with both readers and myself. But it was so last minute I had trouble fitting it in more throughout the rest of Sam’s story!

Cas’ orders? That may or may not have bound him to Dean and removed his free will? Were written into Sam’s story and I went ‘oh SHIT that’s compelling’ and then left them there as a ‘guess I’ll figure that out when I get to Dean’s story lol’

Originally Dean and Cas were supposed to get together after having their souls bonded, and have been in a UST limbo the entire time before that. Mostly because I think the entire concept of ‘we just got married of the soul I guess we should try dating?’ is very funny. CLEARLY the two of them were way more eager to fall in love than I anticipated (thank you Cas for your honesty) but you can still see shades of this original idea here and there (especially in ch35 of TBAM)

I never intended Dean and Benny to connect so well!! Benny was going to reunite with Andrea, she was going to live, and they were going to go off into the world and leave the story. And, uh, here we are. I’m still debating if I need to adjust the relationship tag or not haha. Polyamory is fun, especially when I was planning for Sam to be the polyamorous brother...

Speaking of, I can’t believe I forgot about Sam and his sexuality! If I rewrote TEA I would have had Sam contemplate more on his lack of sexual appetite due to trauma, up until he meets Benny and he gets to rediscover how he wants to be a sexual person

Many of Sam and Dean’s absolutely stupid sibling conversations were lifted near-verbatim from conversations I’ve had with my siblings

And lastly...

Dem where’s Kevin????????????? Where is our sweet baby boy????????

He’s SAFE!! He’s in the Hunter pipeline somewhere cause Sam handed him off to Bobby’s people. He and his mom are safe and at some point they probably got rib sigils like SalmonDean did against angels, but for demons. I didn’t have room in this story for him!!! But my baby boy is SAFE and I want to get him back to university because it’s WHAT HE DESERVES!!!!

To that point: god there were/are SO many characters that I just didn’t include in the story so far because I didn’t feel comfortable including them without stalling the story for them. To that point: pretty much everyone who is alive/dead in s8 is that way in this story, except Bobby who gets to live.

[Check Out Part 2 for reader questions!]

#the love it takes series #to exist again fic #to become a man fic #dem speaks

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ladydorian05 · 4 years ago

Text

A life in retrospection

(pic credit: @a7estrellas)

#Pedros12DaysOfChristmas

Hello @scribbledghost !!! I couldn’t wait, I’m your Secret Santa darling!!!!!

I really, really, REALLY hope you like this. This is actually the third try at writing your gift, I dot nervous and the self doubt worm hit me hard while writing. You mentioned you wanted ‘talking’, well my on the first one it was more talking than anything and was such a mess that I knew no amount of editing would fix it. I didn’t erase it completely I used some parts for the second one that served as the foundation for the final one.

It’s still a little bit of a mess, I suck at choosing titles and maybe the ending is a bit rushed.

Edit: Forgot to mention, Miss Daisy belongs to Scribbledghost, from her neighbour Whiskey series, check it out, you won’t regret it.

A life in retrospection

Soulmate AU!

Pairing: Agent Whiskey/Jack Daniels x fem character (a name is mentioned so it’s not THAT reader friendly)

Warnings: Mentions of drugs, lil bit of depression, Jack goes to therapy so expect to read a different man (we really just yeeted a whole man and turn him into a better one, the beauty of fanfics), fluffiness, this man is not afraid to cry, allusions to spiciness but just implicit.

Words: 3K and something.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He couldn’t believe this was his life now.

He thought as he watched, through a window from the inside of his warm home, as the snowflakes fell outside.

Couldn’t believe he was capable of feeling such happiness again, not after everything he’s had to live through.

A few years ago, he almost committed the biggest mistake of his entire existence, condemning millions of people just because of his trauma. Good thing a pair of gentlemen helped knock some sense into him. Literally. And god bless Champ for giving him a second chance, since then, his life had been filled with second chances.

He finally went to see the Statesman therapist and work through his issues, he gave himself a second chance, to heal, to see the world in a different way.

What he never thought he would get, was a second chance at love, at being loved, but his beloved’s favorite pastime was to just prove him wrong every chance she got.

And prove him wrong she did.

Everyone has a soulmate, even him, and just like everyone else’s, his soul mark appeared on his thirteenth birthday. Right there, the name and the first letter of his soulmate’s last name etched into his skin in his soulmate’s handwriting and just like everyone he had been excited.

He spent countless hours staring at the letters on his wrist, studying the beautiful, soft and round letters, some of them just a breath away from being cursives. Always wondering when and if he would be able to meet the person they belonged to.

As the years passed, he became more aware of how small the chance that he would actually meet his soulmate was, and while he kept wondering about them from time to time, he didn’t stop himself from falling in love with someone else.

He shared many years with her, they got married just as they were fresh out of college, neither of them caring that they weren’t each other’s soulmates. Marriages like theirs weren’t rare at all, after all the world is way too big and life too short to spend it looking for one person.

Yes, life is short and it can be so cruel to the least deserving. The day he lost both his wife and unborn son was the day something inside him broke, something he thought could never be repaired again. He fell in an abysm of self blame that in time turned into bitterness and hatred for those who fell in the clutches of illegal substances. He really thought he would never love again.

Until one day. One fateful day thanks to a mix up with his order at his favorite coffee shop, he met her, his beloved; when their drinks had been served in the wrong cups by the new barista in training.

She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, what were the chances that said woman would turn out to also be his soulmate. From the moment he saw her he felt drawn to her. He knew it, the moment their fingers touched when they exchanged their cups. Something in him shifted with a rush of emotions, leaving him breathless.

Hell, even now she still leaves him breathless.

They had spent the rest of that day getting to know each other, they talked about everything and anything, as if they were old friends seeing each other again after some time apart. He had heard the stories multiple times, people would talk about how they felt the moment they found their soulmate, they all paled in comparison to the overwhelming feeling of being know in such a way by someone you had just met.

He felt so blessed just being able to be in her presence.

Indiana, Indy, his love, his Moonshine, the light of his life that pulled him out of the remaining darkness inside him. You gave him a second chance at love, at actually feeling alive and not just living. And he took it, he would’ve been and idiot if he hadn’t.

They decided to take it slow to truly get to know one another and see where this connection of theirs would take them. After all, not all soulmates went on the romantic route; some, were just destined to be platonic and neither option was better than the other, that’s just the way things were.

But after many dates, after both bared their souls to one another, they were happy to discover that all along there had been something growing between them and that the feeling was mutual.

They shared their first kiss beneath a starry sky, she had taken him to her favorite spot in the city, maybe the stars weren’t as visible as in other places due to the light pollution of the city but neither of you were really looking at them, too lost in one another. After that night everything fell into place.

In the following months, they spent as much time as they could together, lunch breaks, dinners, weekends at each other’s apartments watching movies, talking about work, about anything and everything.

After Champ had notified him that he was going to be allowed go back to field work, he invited you to dinner at his place. He decided to tell you everything then and there, about his wife, about his work; he had previously asked for permission for the last one, assuring his boss that this was serious and that he trusted you completely, he even told you about what he almost did during the whole Golden circle fiasco.

He had expected to see some kind of horror or judgement written in Indy’s face when he finally lifted his head when he stopped talking, he should have known better. He found understanding in your eyes, you told him how proud you were that he looked for help after everything he went through and that ‘James Bond job’ or not, you would be there for him.

You had also added an ‘Of course your alias is Whiskey!’ that made him laugh, but that was beyond the point.

You only asked, that every time he was to go on a mission that he’d let you know, and if he had to leave at a moment’s notice, he would call or text you as soon as he could, you also asked him to be careful.

“We just found each other I don’t want to lose you.” Were your exact words. He remembers because he kissed you as soon as you said them, it started slow and full of gratitude but it soon changed into a passionate one.

That had been the first of many nights, and mornings, he got to share his bed with you. You moved together shortly after that night. Going to bed every night and waking up with you at his side soon became the highlight of his days, if he could he would spend a lifetime just lying with you in bed. He savours every moment he gets by your side.

He had been sure, long before the date of your first year anniversary approached; both of you chose it to be the day you met; that he wanted to be there for you, he wanted to protect you, to make you as happy as you make him, to be anything you needed him to be, a friend, a lover, a life partner; you just had to say it and he’d do anything become that person.

He made a decision. They had already discussed the subject of marriage on more than one occasion, so he was sure it was something you would want or wouldn’t be opposed to it eventually. He still thought about it, long and hard for days.

After his first marriage he never thought he would be open to, well, any kind of relationship that went beyond one-night stands, but that was before therapy, before he worked on the demons inside his head; and now, now he just hoped you would be willing to take an old man as your husband. Again, he should’ve known better.

He planned everything, a romantic dinner at good restaurant; not too over the top fancy but with good food; then he would take you on a romantic walk through Central park, he knew of a spot that had a beautiful gazebo with a view to a pond, he decided he would ask you there; and of course, he sent to polish his mother’s ring.

She gave him the ring some time after his wife passed away and made him promise that he would only give it to his soulmate if he met them. His parents had been soulmates, and his grandparents as well, she explained that the ring had been in the family for many generations and more times than not the marriages had been between soulmates, maybe she believed the ring would bring him luck in finding his own.

With everything carefully planned, he just had to wait for the day to arrive.

But even the best-laid plans, often go awry.

The date fell on a Friday, he was just about to clock in when he received a call from Champ, he and Vermouth; previously known as their Ginger ale; where called for an emergency mission. A Band of extremist where planning a bombing, they got the location of their hideout and were tasked to take them out immediately.

While the mission wouldn’t take him to the other side of the planet, it would take him to the other side of the country, he knew even if they hurried up, he wouldn’t be back in time for the reservation; in fact, if he was lucky, he wouldn’t be back until midnight.

He remembers how much he had apologized to you as he called you on the Statesman’s plane, and bless you and your beautiful heart, you took it in stride, telling him it was fine and that you could celebrate the next day, that all you needed was for him to return to you safe and sound.

And he did just that. At around two in the morning, he opened the door to the apartment he shared with you, he left his hat and jacket at the entrance. He was beginning to un button his shirt when he saw you sleeping on the couch, a box of pizza on the coffee table and the tv still on.

It made him feel guilty but it also warmed his heart that you had tried to wait up for him, he decided against waking you up. He turned the tv off and took you in his arms, you only stirred a little bit before your breath evened out again. He placed you on your side of the bed and tuck you in; he took all of his clothes off except for his briefs before joining you in bed.

The next morning, he stirred awake at the feeling of your lips leaving small kisses all over his chest.

“Mmgood morning Moonshine.” He said, his voice rough from sleep.

“Good morning to you too, cowboy. Sorry I woke you up, but I couldn’t resist.”

“Nothin’ to be sorry about, love. Can’t think of a better way to wake up.” He had pull you closer to his side, your head resting on his arm. “’m sorry I missed our anniversary.”

“None of that Jack, I told you it’s okay. Besides, you can always make it up to me.” You said with mirth, running your hand up and down his torso.

He chuckled. “What did I do to deserve you?” he muttered as he placed a kiss on top of your head.

Both of you stayed quiet, just enjoying the moment, basking in the feeling of being in each other’s arms; until he broke the comfortable silence.

“Marry me.”

The words had just slipped through his lips. He knew neither of you really needed fancy restaurants or romantic venues, you just needed each other. So, what better place and moment to ask you to be his wife, than in the warmth of the home you shared, lying in each other’s arms in their bed.

“What?” He felt your hand stop its movement right on top of his heart, he was sure you had felt how fast it was beating.

“I said, marry me, Moonshine. Please?” You sat on the bed, watching him with an unreadable expression.

“Jack Daniels, you better not be joking.” You had pointed a finger to him.

“Tell me my love, if I wasn’t serious, would I have this?” He said as he also sat on the bed and reached inside of the drawer of the nightstand, taking the velvet box in his hand; not the best hiding place but he hadn’t planned for it to stay there for a long time; he opened it to show you the ring inside.

“Oh my god Jack!” you covered your mouth with your hands as your eyes became glossy with unshed tears.

“Indy, Indiana, my love, my Moonshine, my soulmate. You have no idea how blessed I feel to have you in my life, there aren’t enough words in the world to help me express how much I love you, how much you mean to me. You’re an amazing person, so kind, intelligent, strong and beautiful, and I’ll be more than honored to be your husband, if you’ll have me.” He held his breath as he watched you process what he just said.

He was beginning to get worried when you just sat there for a few seconds, that felt like an eternity to him, staring at him without saying a word. You took him by surprise when you jumped into his arms, just as he was considering on telling you that it was okay if you didn’t want to or that you could take your time before answering.

“Yes! Yes, yes, yes, a thousand times yes Jack! Of course I’ll have you!” By the time he got the ring on your finger both of you were a sobbing mess. He didn’t let you leave the bed until way past noon, and only because neither of you had had breakfast. He had to take good care of his fiancée.

The wedding had been beautiful, only your closest friends and family were invited to the event.

Sometime after the wedding, Champ asked him to move back to Kentucky, he offered him a promotion, he offered him his own position in Statesman, saying that he was ready to retire and that he thought that, out of everyone else, he was the best candidate for it.

His past self would have jumped at the opportunity, not only would he be in charge of the intelligence agency, he would also become the major stockholder of the distillery; but he wasn’t that man anymore, it was a huge responsibility, even if it came with its benefits.

And he had a wife. Your friends lived here, your work was here, you had built a life for yourself in this city long before he came into your life; he couldn’t just go home and tell you ‘Darling, guess what? We’re moving to Kentucky!’ and he refused to leave you behind.

He thanked Champ for the offer and asked him for some time to think about it. He told you about it as soon as he got home. He told you that he couldn’t just ask you to leave what you worked so hard to get behind and follow him down south.

You let him speak, you let him ramble on and on about why it wasn’t a good idea, he also listed some of the positive things that came with accepting the promotion.

“Wait a minute.” You interrupted him in the middle of his tirade. “As the head or director or whatever you guys call it, you would be permanently stationed in Kentucky? As in no more field work?”

“Well, yes and no. At first yes, Champ will have to show me the ropes of everything, then I’ll probably still be active for some years but then well yes, eventually I won’t be sent on missions as frequently as right now. There’s also managing the distillery and that means normal corporate stuff like business trips and all that; it won’t be that different from what I already do here.” You nodded at his words.

“Do it. You have my support.” His eyes widened at that.

“But, but Moonshine, what about your work!?”

“What about it? I’m sure I can request a transfer, and if not I’m sure I can get a new job, it’s not like we’re moving to the middle of nowhere; I could also become a free-lancer.” You listed. “Listen Jack, if moving south means you’ll be risking your life less and less as time goes on, then we’re moving south.” And that was the end of the discussion, he knew the decision was made.

He let you choose the new house, he only asked for enough land to get a horse or two in the future; he was dying to take you on romantic rides; and you chose a beautiful roomy one, neither of you wanted to dismiss the possibility of children. The extra points of the house were the beautiful chimney inside and the fire pit on the back porch, it also had a barn not far from the main building.

And it was good that the house was quite large because half a year after moving in, he convinced you to go with him to a local farm animal expo on his day off. As you browsed through the various handmade items in display, he stumbled upon a woman selling teacup pigs, and while he had always considered himself more of a horses and dogs person, his curiosity got the better of him.

They were so adorable, one in particular caught his attention, he couldn’t resist the adorable beaded eyes looking straight at him; before he knew it, he was making his way back to you holding the little piggy in his arms.

He got a “Jack, why are you holding a pig like a baby?” from you the moment you saw him.

“Because she is! Just look at her she’s so cute, she’s my cute little lady.”

The conversation about the new member of their family continued on the way back home.

“I hope you’re not thinking about letting her stay inside the house once she begins to grow.”

“What are you talking about? Miss Daisy’s a teacup pig; she’ll only grow an inch or maybe three at most.”

“Oh, so it’s Miss Daisy! She already has a name and all that. I’m warning you; I’m not going to pick up what Miss Daisy produces after eating.” You said. “Wait, teacup pig? You are aware there’s no such thing as teacup pigs, right?”

“What do you mean? The woman said they were all teacup pigs.”

“Oh my god. My love, you have been deceived.”

He may not know a lot about pigs, but he couldn’t believe that that sweet woman had outright lied to him, right?

Wrong. Like always, you were right, and he fucked up. At least he eventually convinced you to let him keep Miss Daisy inside. She’ll always be a baby to him, no matter how big she got.

And then, he became an actual father. It wasn’t enough for you to give him so much love and happiness, now you had given him the greatest gift of all. She was perfect, from her tiny nose to her even tinnier toes.

If he had cried when you agreed to marry him, and cried even more when you gave him the news of your pregnancy; he was sure he cried a river the day their daughter was born.

Here he was, years later, still madly in love with you, still feeling like the luckiest man in the world.

He was brought back from his memories by a pair of hands sliding around his middle from behind.

“Hey, I made hot chocolate, want a cup?” He turned around to properly face you, a big smile on his face. “What? Do I have some coco powder on me?”

“No,” he shook his head “no. It’s just, well, you just took my breath away.” He said wiggling his eyebrows up and down in the way he knew always made you laugh.

“Pffff, Jack, I married you, you can stop saying stuff like that.”

“On the contrary, Moonshine, I shall keep on stating the truth of how my stunning wife makes me feel every single day of my life.” He leaned to give you a sweet short kiss.

“You haven’t answered Mr. Daniels, hot chocolate or do you want a cup of coffee?”

“Mmmm, I’ll have the chocolate this time, gotta honor the drink that brought you into my life, Mrs. Daniels.” He pressed his forehead against yours.

“What’s gotten into you today?” You asked, laughing softly as the hairs of his moustache tickled your upper lip.

“Nothing, just been reminiscing my happiest memories. Want to know a secret?” He whispered the question. “They’re all about you.” He leaned in for another kiss when the voice of his little girl calling for him reached them.

“Daddy! Daddy! Look! Look at Miss Daisy! Isn’t she pretty?” He turned his head from his Moonshine as his daughter came running up to them in her cute pajamas, just in time to see Miss Daisy as she came waddling behind his lil’ sweetheart wearing a pink tutu, a tiara and he noticed her glittery pink painted hooves.

“Wow, sweetheart! She’s really pretty!” He tried to sound excited for his daughter’s sake, but he knew it came out more strained than he wanted.

She giggled before running off back to her room, with, once again, Miss Daisy running after her.

“Want me to google if that nail polish could be potentially harmful for her while you put our little tornado to sleep?” God bless his wife.

“Yes, please.” He let out a sigh. “You’re amazin’ Moonshine.” He turned back to you before placing a sweet kiss on your lips.

“I got you, cowboy.” He had to separate from your arms so he could go help their daughter keep her bed time schedule, otherwise they’ll surely have a cranky child for most of the next day.

“Hey honey! You want a bed time story?” he heard a distant ‘yay’ and a couple of snorts in response. “Be right back babe.” With a wink as he walked towards their daughter’s room.

Maybe he’ll never get used to this much happiness in his life, but he’ll never complain, what were the odds that he would meet his soulmate and build a beautiful home and a beautiful family with her. He must have done at least something right if he got to live this life.

And he will live it, to its fullest.

Tag list (do let me know if anyone wanst to be tagged in future works):

@oloreaa

#pedros12daysofchristmas #agent whiskey #agent jack whiskey daniels #agent whiskey x f!reader #agent whiskey x female reader #agent whiskey x fem! reader #jack daniels x f!reader #jack daniels x female reader #jack daniels x fem! reader #agent whiskey x reader #jack daniels x reader #kingsman agent whiskey #kingsman the golden circle whiskey

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pingnova · 4 years ago

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every time ao3 runs a fundraiser I have to see at least one bad take on my dash that just makes me cringe because apparently people think software, hardware, maintenance, and being a legal nonprofit entity is free. I’m afraid to inform you we live under capitalism where literally everything costs money especially such a massively popular website. they have to buy web security so they don’t get DDOS’d (REALLY expensive), they host their OWN SERVERS, and LOTS of them, a small core group of programmers does all the fixes and innovation FOR FREE and the time it took to learn enough to get to their point and the time it takes to actively do this shit is really snappin a lot. you can have issues with ao3, I probably won’t agree with you but like, it’s your brain. but don’t bully them for the material realities of running a hugely popular website and a legally recognized nonprofit? so many organizations irl become businesses before they become nonprofits because it’s so complicated, time consuming, and expensive to become and recertify as a nonprofit. it’s easier to become a moderately successful corporation than a small nonprofit that survives more than three years in operation, and that’s not even accounting for a nonprofit whose main service is something with such massive overhead and active upkeep as one of the most popular sites on the internet. they have a public real time dashboard of what their programmers are working on, and like every nonprofit in the us release their financial report at least annually. it’s not AO3’s fault you don’t understand how websites or nonprofits work. a $100k fundraiser once a year is actually a shit operating budget for any org. that’s two functional salaries, so two full time employees, with no benefits or office space or honestly any product. That’s just enough to pay two people for their damn time. AO3 is 99% incredibly dedicated and skilled volunteers who make and upkeep an open source democratic fandom hub at essentially only the cost of operation. again, you can criticize their rules or whatever, because the basis is your opinion, but legal, financial, and technical realities don’t change based on your opinion. this is like criticizing a library because it’s built on the ground. everything is built on the ground. I especially hate this because as someone with huge investment in the social good and nonprofit sector it’s frustrating to see people wasting energy on a completely valid aspect of something. there are plenty of bullshit nonprofits out there that support shit like child labor in the us, but criticizing them for having an operating budget will make anyone look like an idiot. so once more criticize other things but not the literal legally binding requirements for telling the us government you don’t profit off the free work you do. EDIT and on top of being in the nonprofit sector I’m ALSO a web programmer and I cannot tell you how exhausting and rage inducing this very attitude is in my field. people contact me about programming them a custom website and will be shocked if it’s even $100. the general sense ive got is that many think I can slap together a massive interactive website by hand for $20. absolutely not???? I under charge because of the nonprofit aspect, but $3,000 for a website is cute. it’s even cute for just maintaining an existing website. $10,000 might do it for a small site with a few pages. ao3 has billions of pages. ignoring that the ao3 is part of a larger nonprofit hosting many many more sites, archives, legal work, etc (that you DEFINITELY legally or socially benefit from whether you’re aware of it or not, AO3s legal recently wrote a Supreme Court brief that helped rule in favor of keeping parts of previous widely depended upon software public goods so that the price you pay for internet & literally everything doesn’t blow), there are so many costs associated with making and maintaining a website that it’s apparently frankly unimaginable to thousands of people on tumblr, and in the end disrespectful to every nonprofit, programmer, and web designer out there.

#personal #I generally don’t have to see too much but god

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prorevenge · 4 years ago

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Fire me for doing my job? Pay up.

TL/DR at bottom.

A couple of years ago, I was hired as a Technical Account Manager for an enterprise software company. My job was a combination of project management, technical support, and customer relations management. When I started, it seemed like a decent job, for the most part, though the software, seemed immature. The software's purpose was to audit customer systems, searching for certain data, to be able to report on compliance. It was a very new company, founded by some guys who been successful at starting companies before, there was stock, it seemed on the up and up.

I had a couple very large customers, and we were having performance problems with two of the searches. I filed bugs, and worked on managing the processes to get to resolution. During this time, my management starting getting distant. We were signing lots of contracts, so I just put it off as them being busy.

They issued a release to fix the performance problem. I installed it, and we reran the job. I'm monitoring the logs, and the performance problem still exists. The job is hanging when the system tries to query this one table, which has literally billions of rows. Our logs do not display the actual query being run, to avoid exposing information about database security. But the customer guys I worked with were DBAs, and they could see the query on their side. They showed it to me. The query was using a WHERE clause that was of the form, SELECT this, that, theother FROM table WHERE CAST(column) AS VARCHAR = searchvalue.

Now, any competent developer who was evaluating a performance problem would instantly see that it would have been efficient to cast "searchvalue" to the column type, which would have executed the CAST once, as opposed to doing it on the column value, which would be done as many times as there are rows in the table. The CAST was being executed billions of times. This meant multiple things:

the developer doing this was careless and/or unskilled

nobody with 1st year computer science skilled had reviewed the 'fix'

they hadn't actually verified improved performance before shipping the fix

I summarized this in email to my manager and our boss, asking that they raise a stink about this. We bragged about our excellent development team, and this wasn't up to our standards. Silence. Like, literally no reply.

We are still selling contracts left and right, and the company meetings are all about how our valuation is soaring. I am being told to tell the customer that we are working on this and other improvements. During this time, our preliminary runs are at the customer are not returning the results we should be seeing. After the above experience, I check out the source code and start digging in. I realize that there is a fundamental logical flaw in our search approach, and that for certain systems, the software simply cannot work as designed, without significant additional development. I can't go into what that was without violating an agreement that will be discussed shortly. I bring this up in an email, and again, silence. The customer is getting frustrated and angry meetings are being had. I bring these up with management, and again, silence.

Along the way, I invent a way to use our software, that, with a small bit of additional functionality, creates the ability for a customer to use our system at a customer's vendor companies to expedite the audit. This turns every customer into a salesman for us, as it causes them to demand that their vendors buy and use our software. Huge win.

The next week, I get a call from the senior manager. I am told to leave the customer site, and go home. I can see the handwriting on the wall. I find out from co-workers that he has told the customer that the reason for the lack of results is my poor skills, and that they will replace me. Internally, they are telling my coworkers that they were tired of my toxic attitude.

During this time, two other employees have been removed from projects due to customer complaints about the project. They are redeployed to other accounts, I am not.

A week later, they fire me. No reason given, no severance. They, however, don't fire the other two guys. Big mistake. I'm over 50, they are 30 somethings. This is the US, where being over 50 is a protected class for discrimination law.

I realize that what is going on. They are pumping the value of the company, getting the contract volume growing, so that they can flip the company to a corporate buyer and make some quick big money. The talk of going public was always bullshit.

I contact a lawyer. We write a demand letter. We explain the disparate treatment due to age, and note that:

the state I am in doesn't allow mandatory arbitration in employment contracts, so they can't force private arbitration, and we will be able to pursue court action

they have no record of any job performance issues or lack of technical skill, given that I found the bug, explained the fix, and added significant capability to the product supporting substantial new sales. I had great relations with the customers, and we would call them to say so.

while we might or might not prevail, the technical issues and poor engineering practices that I found would become a matter of court record, becoming visible to anyone doing due diligence on the company, crushing their valuation in their pump and dump scheme, and that this would be visible to new and existing customers.

I had a check for six months pay in my hand a week later. I had also been interviewing, and landed a great new job with a product that actually works (completely different functional area) that same week. The agreement that we signed prohibits me saying anything public about them, and them from saying anything about me, so no further details. And they neglected to collect my Macbook, so free computer, as the agreement says that no further claims can be made by either party.

TL/DR; they tried to throw me under the bus to further a get rich quick scheme, and I got a better job, and six months pay for them trying to fuck me over.

[edit] corrected SQL

(source) story by (/u/UnkleRinkus)

#prorevenge #by /u/UnkleRinkus #pro revenge #revenge stories #pro revenge stories #pro #revenge #last10

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songtoyou · 4 years ago

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Mr. Evans and the Congresswoman - Part 2

Paring: Chris Evans x Politician Reader

Rating: PG

Word Count: 1,858

Warnings: Political topics such as Biden, Harris, our current White House occupant and the current administration.

Description: It is the week of the DNC and Chris is once again interviewing you for A Starting Point.

A/N: The DNC inspired me to write a second part for this story. This is pure fiction as I do not know what Chris believes when it comes to politics and policy issues. This is a complete work of fiction.

I do not permit my work to be to be posted on any other site without my permission.

Note: Updated for grammar and punctuation edits.

"Hi, Congresswoman Y/L/N?" Chris Evans asked with a smile.

He was once again interviewing you for ASP. This time it was during the week of the Democratic National Convention. Chris and Mark had already talked to other politicians such as Senator Cory Booker and Representatives Ro Khanna and Alma Adams. You were the last elected official he was slated to interview to wrap up the DNC week.

Truthfully, Chris was happy to get the chance to talk with you again. Your previous interview for ASP was such a hit that it garnered a lot of attention from fans and the media. However, it was not because you helped bring more legitimacy and attention for ASP, but instead, Chris found himself genuinely admiring you.

"Hi," you said to Chris, giving a small wave through the Zoom screen. "I told you to call me by my first name."

"I know, but I still want to show respect," Chris responded with a teasing smile. Was he mildly flirting with the congresswoman? Yes, but he had no shame in doing so. "How are you? You are looking well."

"I am doing well. Thank you. How about you?"

"Same. Just trying to stay sane through everything. I'm actually currently in London. Working on a project." Chris admitted.

"Uh oh. You better be staying safe and following the right procedures and protocols," you lightly reprimanded him.

"My fans ratted me out. They found where I was just by the hotel door. Can you believe that? That is some FBI-level investigating, right there. I'd be impressed if I weren't also terrified of the lengths some of these fans will go to scout my location," Chris ranted. He did not understand why he was sharing this with you, but a part of him felt comfortable doing so.

"That…is quite impressive, I must say. Creepy. Scary. But impressive. You need to learn how to put in a Zoom background. It would solve all of your problems," you suggested to him.

"I would, but I'm technology deficient. Maybe I should look up some Zoom tutorials on how to do it. Give it a try."

"There is no try…only do," you advised cheekily.

"Now you're quoting Yoda. A woman after my own heart," Chris replied. He knew he needed to refocus. "So, as you can tell, Mark won't be joining us for this interview. I'm going to hit record if that is okay?"

"Okay. I'm ready when you are," you said.

When the record notification appeared on screen, Chris introduced you and immediately went into the first question.

"How do you think the DNC is going so far, particularly how this year is more of a virtual setting rather than in-person due to COVID-19?"

"Despite not having the big in-person celebration/gathering, I think the virtual setting is working very well. Better than I expected, actually. It gives off a more inclusive and intimate vibe to the DNC that we haven't felt before. I like the whole documentary approach and feel to it," you replied honestly.

"Were you excited that Joe Biden chose Senator Kamala Harris as his running mate?" asked Chris.

"Oh my God! I was so happy that Vice President Biden chose Senator Harris as his running mate. Like, my staff and I were beyond ecstatic. There is no one better to be Biden's running mate than Harris. She is amazing. Such an inspiration. I'm not going to lie, but I'm really excited for the debate between her and Pence."

That made Chris laugh. "Yeah, me too. Senator Harris really knows how to pull all the punches. Her nomination as VP has been met with overall positive response. The Trump Administration and Republican pundits appear to have a hard time painting a negative image of Harris. Why do you think Trump and Fox News are struggling to provide a negative image for her?"

"That is an excellent question. The public's overwhelming response to Harris' nomination is because 1.) she is the first black and south Asian woman to be on a major presidential ticket, and 2.) she is likable and charming. She has this exuberant energy that attracts people to her. You know, black and brown women and girls finally have someone that looks like them running for the second-highest office in the land. That is huge!

"I also have to wonder if people have smartened up in the last four years and won't tolerate the…hypocrisy, sexism, and misogyny…in this case misogynoir that is thrown towards Senator Harris from the media, political pundits, social media bots, etc. So, what we are seeing with Trump and Fox News struggling to attack her is because…well…they just aren't smart. All we have seen from Trump in his attacks against her is that she was mean to Kavanaugh when questioning him during his nomination process. But none of what Trump says holds up because we all know that smart, confident women intimidate him," you finished off your point.

"There is also the left…or more of the progressive left who are unhappy with Biden choosing Harris," Chris spoke up and continued, "They say she is a cop and put people away for weed. That she took kids away from parents when the kid didn't show up for school. That Harris is too conservative. What do you say to that?"

"All of that is…you know…. Senator Harris one of the most policy progressive senators we have. Her voting record is more progressive than Bernie Sanders. All people have to do is research her time as a district attorney and Attorney General for California to find out what she actually did concerning policy. But as we both know, people nowadays don't know how to critically think, which scares me. Progressives need to look at the overall big picture. This election in November is crucial. We are in the fight for our democracy, for our country, and for our lives…literally."

"I talk with my brother, Scott, all the time about certain political issues," mentioned Chris. "He is a tad more progressive than I am. I can admit that I tend to be more centrist. The district you represent is a mix of blue and red areas; how do you balance opposing views from your constituents?"

You took in a deep breath before you answered. That was a loaded question. Representing a district that was not solely red, or blue could be difficult from time to time. You wanted to be respectful of the different viewpoints from constituents, but maintaining a neutral balance was hard and frustrating at times.

"The majority of Americans are centrist/moderates. You need a balance of both liberal and conservative policies. Bipartisanship is crucially important when developing and passing laws. We are currently seeing an overt of one-sidedness while sabotaging the other side, which is detrimental to our country's growth. It is important to reach across the aisle to talk with those who may have opposing views than you. At the end of the day, people just want to feel that their concerns are heard and valued. We all want to feel that way. So, as an elected official, I make sure to take the time to talk with those in rural areas, along with urban areas, about their issues and concerns," you shared.

"Do you ever get any pushback from Trump supporters in the red areas?" Chris inquired.

"Well, it is important to note that not all residents in rural areas are Trump supporters. They just tend to keep that to themselves. I have actually talked to Trump supporters in blue areas. We can never and should never assume that one area has this type of person and vice versa. I learned that the hard way when I was campaigning for city council early in my career," you revealed to Chris with a small chuckle. "But overall, my constituents will talk with me and have been respectful. Some of the concerns that have been shared with me do fall under the QAnon conspiracy theories, which do disturb me, I'll be honest. Um…when being confronted with someone who has that extreme of ideals, it is important to remain calm and not to come off combative. Meaning that I have to remind myself that I am not quite dealing with a rational person. The only thing that I can do is calmly talk to the person and respond back with facts. Either they listen or brush me off and call me a radical lefty."

"The majority of people are good, like you said," Chris reminded you.

"That's right. It's a good mantra to live by. I think the American people are tired and have been tired for the past four years with this Administration. We need a sense of normalcy and decency. Compassion and empathy, which were two of the big themes during the DNC. This week was a nice reminder that we, as a country, can have that again."

"I agree. Very well said. You always end on a positive. I appreciate that. Thank you, Congresswoman Y/L/N, for taking the time to talk with me. You always provide great insight into the world of politics and your experience as an elected official," said Chris and ended the recording. "That was really great, Y/N. I know Mark, and I really appreciate you taken the time to do these interviews for ASP," Chris added.

"Oh, it is no problem. Like I said before, I like what you both are doing with the site. Are you happy with how everything turned out?" you asked him.

"Yeah… it's…it took a while to just get the website up and running. I know there is still work that needs to be done. Some areas need to be fixed, but with a project like this, we can adjust. There is more room for improvement and growth," Chris communicated to you.

You nodded in agreement. "Politics is a whole different ballgame. Not many people are willing to venture into the field. It can cause a lot of annoyances and headaches. So, hats off to you, my friend," you said, giving Chris a salute.

"Thank you. Well, I better let you go. I know you must have a million things on your plate."

"Ah yes, I have to go and save the United States Postal Service from corruption. Talk to you later, Chris. Take care," you waved goodbye and signed off.

Chris had to admit, he was in awe of you. There was something about you that fascinated him. None of the elected officials he and Mark talked to for ASP had the liveliness you had. You were not jaded or defeated by the system, at least not yet, since you were still considered a junior member of congress. Chris hoped that the energy and enthusiasm you had for politics and helping people would not diminish. When his Uncle Mike was still a congressman, he shared with Chris that D.C. can cause a lot of strain on a person's values and beliefs. "I have seen too many of my colleagues succumb to the pressures of dirty politics," Uncle Mike once said.

Chris just hoped that you would not succumb to those pressures.

#chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years ago

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Survey #461

“this city looks so pretty, do you wanna burn it with me?”

Have you ever wanted a Nikon camera? Or do you have one already? My camera before the one I have now was a Nikon D3200. I use a Canon now. Who was the last person (if anyone) you said Happy Birthday to? A friend. Do you have Photoshop? If so, how often a day do you use it? I have it, but I barely use it nowadays. I use it to edit photos for character profiles or profile pictures, add a watermark for my actual photography, and I used to make Mark-oriented gifs like crazy. They mostly did really well, so... I might wanna get back into that and get That Sweet Validation. Do you watch any shows that you know your parents wouldn’t approve of? No. Have any of your exes gotten married or had kids since your breakup? None, I think. Do either of your parents have a mental illness? My mom has depression. Can you tolerate children for a long period of time? NO. Have you ever lived with someone you felt thoroughly uncomfortable around? No. Are you into dubstep? Yeah, I tend to enjoy it. Zelda or The Sims games? Can I pick neither? lol I don't feel very much at all for The Sims, and Zelda games have always looked... boring to me? Like I've watched most of the Game Grumps' playthroughs of all the games, and they make it hilarious of course, but the games themselves? Nah. Are you terrible at assigning bands their proper genre? YES YES YES YES YES YES. Even in my preferred category, that being metal, FUCK if I know the sub-genre. Have you ever made out in a closet? No, that shit sounds claustrophobic as hell. Have you ever been to a laser tag place? Yeah, on a triple-date once! It was SO fun. How do you wanna celebrate your next birthday? Have a couple friends over, pig out at The Cheesecake Factory. o3o Do you tease your parents about them being old? No, especially not Mom. She's self-conscious about getting older. Are you in love with someone? "In love" is a bit too far, buddy. But I love someone. Have you ever ridden a unicycle? No. Have you ever wanted a pet bunny? I was VERY serious about getting a lop-eared bunny for quite a while, but we just couldn't afford to adopt one (even off Craigslist) and get a cage for it, toys, etc. Are the bottom of your feet clean? I HATE seeing the bottom of my feet. Not because they're dirty, but because it's Callus City. I ain't even fuckin jokin'. Do you like really salty food? Yeah. :x When’s the last time you bled a lot? Well, I just recently finished my cycle after not menstruating for three or four MONTHS, so you can figure that one out. Have you ever watched a needle go into your own skin? Yeah. I like to know exactly when it's coming. Have you ever seen someone get a piercing/tattoo? Yes to both. When you’re done eating finger foods, do you usually lick your fingers? Usually kasdjlf;kalsdjf shut up ok I like food. What’s the most racist thing you have ever said? As a little kid, when my really good friend (a neighborhood kid, even) asked if he thought we'd be a good couple, I told him no because "blacks and whites don't date" or something like that. It was an idea I'd never been exposed to before; the idea was so foreign to little kid me. I had no idea I was being racist. It ended in a small fight and we didn't talk for a few days 'til he came to my house telling Mom that he had to "be a man" and fix this and if that ain't the cUTEST SHIT RIGHT THERE. We were friends again after that. He's still on my Facebook, and he actually semi-recently got married! :') Do you know someone that is mute, deaf or blind? No. Have you ever spent more than two weeks in a wheelchair? No. Does weed smell good? Or no? Ugh, no. Where do you see your closest friend in ten years? Successful and happy she kept pushing. Mama to so many reptiles that are blessed with the best lives possible in human care. Got at least one amazing book out there. If she's reading this, you've fucking got this. <3 Would you like to have twins? Mother of fucking god, no. Even if I WANTED kids, do fucking not give me twins. Who was the last person you got into an argument with? My mom. Want to have kids before you’re 30? Once again, I don't want kids, but IF I did, that'd be preferable before the risk of birth defects and other issues climb with age. Does anybody have a tattoo with your name on it? My older sister has my initial. Do you think somebody’s in love with you? No. Do you think you and your best friend will be friends in ten years? Yes, I genuinely do. Who were the last people to hang out at your house? Miss Tobey, our friend and landlord. Does anyone like you? Welp... I hope he still does. Guess we'll figure that out soon. What person on your Facebook do you talk to the most? VIA Facebook? Probably my friend Lyndsey. She likes to comment on stuff I share. Do you want to fall in love? I do, but I'm also utterly horrified to and risk being hurt again. Are you interested in more than one person at the moment? No. Once I realized I was so deeply into Girt, all other romantic feelings kinda just... poofed. How was your last break up? Civil and done with both of our best interests in mind. What is the hardest thing you’ve ever had to say? Probably the first time I admitted I needed to go to the hospital for suicidal thoughts. I was so, so scared of what it was going to be like. What is the hardest thing you NEEDED to hear? That if Jason wasn't happy with me, he had every right to move on. She was right. Do you treat yourself well? No... but I'm trying to change that. What was the last song you sang out loud to? This "Set Fire to the Rain" cover. Do you take good pictures? I think I do? Have you ever done any internship? No. What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? Holy shit, so much, especially when it comes to morality and political stances. I am now a massive supporter and member of the LGBTQ+ community, I'm pro-trans rights, pro-choice... I've done like a dozen 180s in a lot of topics. Do you know anyone who has a PhD? I mean, some doctors, but no one in my truly personal life. Do you know anyone who works as a lawyer? Yes: my cousin. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? LAKSDJFKLA;JWD NEVER AND I PRAY TO THE HOLY LORD THAT I NEVER DO. Does the thought of having wrinkles when you’re older upset you? Not massively? Like literally everyone gets them and is natural and inevitable. Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? I know one alcoholic, and one that's probably borderline. I also have two friends who are extremely addicted to weed. Look me in the eyes and say it's not an addictive substance and I wouldn't believe you one bit. Is there a video or computer game that you can get lost in for hours? Eh, sometimes World of Warcraft. Some days I'm really into it, and others I barely touch it. What’s your favorite Disney Channel movie? I have no clue. I don't even remember movies that were made *for* Disney exclusively. Do you ever have to do yard work? No. We have a friend from the dance studio mow the lawn. Do you have any live versions of songs in your music software? My iPod has a whole live album of Ozzy. Did you or do you listen to Britney Spears songs? Both did and do. Britney is a boss bitch. Does your favorite band have a male or female lead singer? Male. Have you seen the movie Moulin Rouge? No, but I've seen some of that P!nk music video of the song and it brings out the Gay in me. Do you have a key to anything besides your house? No. Could you ever complete a 500-piece puzzle? I've done that before. I miss doing puzzles... Have you ever been to any sort of convention? I went to a reptile expo with Sara!! I REALLY want to go to another when my legs are stronger and can handle standing and walking so much. Is your mom or dad the older parent? Mom. Have you ever tried to walk on a moving vehicle and fallen over? No????? What is your favourite kind of bread? Is there any of that in your house? Pumpernickel. No. Are/were you in the school band, and if so, what instrument did you play? I played the flute all through middle school and I wanna say half of HS. Have you ever ordered an unusual drink at a bar? Never even been to one. Have you ever been pulled aside by security at the airport? I think once for some reason I don't recall? What is your favourite seasonal candy? (only available at certain times) Gingerbread men, probs. Or chocolate bunnies!!! :') How do you feel right now? My stomach is KILLING me. I'm super excited though that Girt is coming over tomorrow. Have you ever had surgery that kept you in the hospital for over a day? No. What would you like your generation to change? How we treat nature. Is there anyone that you truly could not live without? No. I learned that is a very unhealthy mentality to have. Do you like carrots more if they’re raw, or cooked? I just hate carrots. What restaurant did you last go out to dinner at with friends? With friends? I couldn't even guess. Does your refrigerator have an ice maker or do you use ice cube trays? It has an ice maker. Do you have a favorite sibling, if any? No; I love them all. Do you have a favorite brand of clothing? I STAN CLOAK. How’s the love life? Something new might start tomorrow. I think it will. Do you watch the news? No; that shit is depressing. Who do you admire most? Mark. Do you have a favorite album? Black Rain by Ozzy Osbourne takes the cake and always will.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''city'' by hollywood undead

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peachy-inserts · 5 years ago

Note

HCs for Todoroki, Deku, and Bakugou on their reactions when their (s/o) is ill, but trudges through their ailment to support these guys (despite the boys’ protests not to) in the Sports Festival and passes out in the audience due to the illness and fatigue, resulting in quarantine, please?

Sorry for the wait! God… you can really tell I don’t write for Bakugou enough by how off topic I am. I just have so much to say about this lovable dick that I don’t typically have the opportunity to

Warnings: Cursing

Midoriya:

When you first began to show symptoms of sickness, Deku became a worrying mess and found himself slacking off on training despite the sports festival being so soon

Not that he really needed it, but it’s Deku

Like I said before, he’s a total worrywart. We know this about him! No matter what it is, he is an absolute anxious mess. You’d better not tell him that you came out to watch him anyways!

He knows how much it means to you, and while you got good seats as a result of being in general studies, you could always watch it from home! It was broadcasted nationally, and it’s not like you would miss anything; they did a pretty good job covering all of the details!

We’re gonna go with the scenario where you don’t tell him you came out to support him, because if you did he simply wouldn’t participate until you caved in. Deku is a chaotic force of good and more importantly, incredibly fucking stubborn. I know he’s a sweet boy, but good God he does NOT take no for an answer. Kid doesn’t listen for absolute shit!

In the middle of the festival, he notices a little bit of a commotion in the crowd but shrugs it off; he’s gotta make sure he impresses you, since you’re supposedly watching him on the television!

It’s not until afterwards that he hears about it, being informed that you’ve been put on quarantine as well

Let’s just say he is heartbroken. More than anything, he was looking forward to coming back to the dorms to pay you a visit and relax after a long, tiring day. With the sports festival off of his chest, he can take care of you without being so stressed about it… Except, that’s not the case

Since you’re contagious, you’ve been sent to your own house. That way the sickness doesn’t spread, and you can be properly taken care of

As soon as he gets permission to, he is on his way! ...Only to be greeted at the door by a family member who shoos him away, since you are quarantined after all

Deku would (impatiently) wait it out with you, trying to make it as easy as possible. He’ll run to all of your teachers collecting work, and even try to do some of it for you. He does spend a lot of time studying, after all, so you don’t have much to worry about

He had the next two days off after the tournament to recuperate and rest, which was spent almost entirely on FaceTime with you, showing you his new injuries (we all know it happened, the boy has no rationality), trying to help you with your makeup work by the tutoring the best way he can, and fawning over your tired but loving expression. Actually, mostly just that last part

Delivery man Deku! He’d pick up all of your favorite snacks, candies, and bottled drinks, then deliver them personally to your house. Being shooed away the last time though, he opts to leave them in a woven basket with a poorly tied bow and a note in the bottom, which is just for you

Todoroki:

While he would be worried about you, he ultimately believes that it’s your decision on what you do. If you wanna come to the sports festival and watch him he won’t stop you, but he can at least try and persuade you by telling you just how he feels about it

That’s not to say he isn’t disappointed, though. Like Deku, he wouldn’t know that you had passed out until after the festival; either because he’s so focused or even because he’s just too dense. It could even be a combination of both, knowing him

Shouto would be quick to chastise you, almost akin to Bakugou in the way he wastes no time in telling you just how you fucked up. However, he’s still timid and suffers from commitment issues stemming from insecurity and his upbringing. He’s just as quick to apologize, sighing and wishing you get wells from the bottom of his heart

The sports festival is long off of his mind by now; to be honest, he didn’t really care about it in the first place. Whether or not you saw it is beyond him, although he appreciates the thought

He knows better than to try and come see you while you’re quarantined, but he doesn’t really give two shits. If he gets sick that’s his own problem, so he won’t stand for being denied time with you; he’ll at least take precautions and wear a mask, though.

Besides, you’re in this situation because of him. Even though he stands by his stance on this being your choice, he still feels deep down like it’s his fault

Shouto is sort of the awkward type in this stage of your relationship, so he won’t necessarily go out of his way for you. He’d gather your work for you since he’s still at the school, but if he’s unwelcome in your home due to the sickness he won’t fight it or show up again.

Still yet though, he misses you and is worried more than he would like to admit. Lots of random calls and texts from him

He would spend all day looking for those cutesy heart edits and sending them to you, or finding shitty memes and teasing you over them, saying it reminded him of you

ONE MORE THING: He’s sappy as shit, and being inexperienced and sort of isolated from society in a way (he didn’t even know what a concert was) he’d try and stick to cheesy romantic ideals. This man would write you a whole ass poem to give to you with some chocolates whenever you returned to the dorms, waiting on your bed

Bakugou:

The most assertive in telling you to stay home. He’s hyper aware of your sickness and how it spread, but most importantly aware of how badly it’s going to affect you. Let him catch you coming anyways and he’ll kill you

Because he’s so knowledgeable on the topic, he’s easily the most worried by far. It’s not that he’s scared for your safety so much, but more so your general wellbeing. Katsuki is miserable whenever he’s sick, so the thought of you going through the same thing is almost agonizing for him

He acts like a total mom and you can’t change my mind on this. Also, I don’t agree with fanon Bakugou being arrogant and hateful towards his s/o. This man is putty in your hands, and although he acts annoyed at times he prioritizes making sure that you’re comfortable and know how he truly feels. He’s always had trouble communicating his feelings because of his relationship with his mother (we all love her but I will die on this hill) and as a result of it, is honestly terrified of fucking up and losing you by being too closed off

Anyways though, back to the point: he would be a total mom when you’re sick! Bossing you around, don’t do this, eat this, breathe some of this in, here, have some tea- It’s honestly exhausting having to listen to whatever miracle cure he’s concocted for you next, but you know he at least means well. He really does go above and beyond for his s/o, especially when they’re unwell. The most important part in a relationship to him is being able to lean on each other when you can’t stand up on your own, and by God he’ll carry you for as long as you need him to. Literally and figuratively

I know I’m going off on a tangent but I just have so much to say about my interpretation of Bakugou: he’s the boyfriend who insists on trying to fix all of your problems instead of just listening to them, and it’s one of the most frustrating things

ALSO BAKUGOU DOES NOT, CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, CALL HIS S/O NAMES LIKE ‘IDIOT’ AND ‘BASTARD’. HE DRINKS HIS RESPECT (WOMEN) JUICE

Katsuki is very intuitive; even though you most likely lied about staying home to get him off your ass, it doesn’t take long for him to know that you’ve come anyways, and HOOOO BOY is he pissed (not that he’d ever take that aggression out on you, though. He’ll save that for the finals)

His head is swirling throughout nearly the entire tournament, and he’s thrown completely off of his game. On a typical day, he’d be trying to show off for you and flexing whenever he can while flawlessly demolishing his opponents, but this time he only makes it into the top ten

He can’t stop stealing glances into the stands, his mind wandering into the empty seat beside you and dying to know whether or not you’re okay, all while absolutely fuming. More than anything, he’s mad at himself. It’s been proven to us time and time again that he tends to blame himself for things, and takes it way too personally, to the point of being self destructive as a result of a sweltering, nasty inferiority complex

Immediately after the tournament, when he’s released and free to head back to the dorms and rest, he sits down in the locker room and calls your cell. Two times, three times, and finally four times with no response. Ok, now his heart rate is shot

By the time he finally comes into contact with you he’s in a cold sweat, brow furrowed in aggravation and concern; a strange mixture. Calm him down, let him know you’re alright, and assure him that you’re perfectly safe and comfortable at home, well taken care if

Once that’s over with, expect a lengthy lecture about the dangers of exposing yourself while you know you’re sick, thoroughly chastising you and expressing just how worried about you he truly is (Seriously guys, if you’re sick even in the slightest STAY HOME)

Like Deku, he would want to spend as much time with you as possible, even if it’s over FaceTime. He tends to be a little paranoid over germs, though, so since it’s not like you live together he won’t pay any visits to your house. Quarantine means business!

However, though, he will prepare a nice little surprise in your dorm room for when you come back. A carefully decorated array of dried flowers, candies, and small snacks. Katsuki prides himself in all that he does and strives for perfection in every aspect of life; this is no exception. He lives to impress you!

Once you’ve beaten the worst of the sickness, he cracks down on you and will begin to act like he’s a professor on Zoom; man schedules FaceTime meetings between the two of you for him to catch you up on everything that you’ve missed. Let’s not forget, he’s at the head of his class and devotes a large portion of time and dedication into his academic studies

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carrisarune · 4 years ago

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In Your Eyes

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Note: At this point, please expect at least a few errors as I basically dish these out as soon as I’m done even with a quick review. Editing of previous chaps may occur at one point though so there is that. I have to say a great thanks again to Bree and Preet for all their support and encouragement, you guys are amazing

Tags: @jamespotterthefirst @schnitzelbutterfingers @aestheticartsx

CHAPTER FOUR: NEW PEOPLE AND A NEW HOME

The next morning arrived and after a restless sleep between the not so comfy bed and trying to calm his raging thoughts, Rai was ready to face the new day. As he made his way to the staff entrance, he happened to catch Bryce playing basketball with some other surgeons. At one point, the ball rolled to Rai’s feet. “Well, come one then Hayashi. You gonna play, or you gonna send that back over?” Bryce called, clearly challenging the other.

Picking up the ball, Rai stuck out his tongue in concentration before shooting the ball. Somehow, rather than entering the hoop, the ball hit the support board, hit the ground, then bounced towards a bewildered Bryce, who caught it. A beat of silence came before Bryce, along with the other surgeons burst into laughter.

Bryce leaned against Rai as he exclaimed, “Man you’re a riot Rai” while the male sighed. “Me and ball sports never did have the best relationship” Rai mused. Patting him in consolation Bryce stated, “Hey, not everyone can be good at everything like me” before laughing as Rai bumped his hip in retaliation. After giving Rai’s hair a quick ruffle, Bryce went back to his game. A quick fix of his hair and walk later, Rai was in the changing room and getting ready for work.

He had just placed on his shirt when Sienna came in and announced her arrival with cookies. Upon hearing that, Rai perked and went over to request for some. As he stuffed some cookies like a squirrel, he missed Jackie question how Sienna was so chipper in the morning. He only looked up when he heard Sienna describe the apartment she found and Jackie being skeptical about it. Swallowing the cookies and wiping his mouth from any crumbs, he chimed in, “Well, we can always go together and make a run for it if it’s like some old killer’s den.”

Both girls laughed at that before Sienna informed them that there might be a chance they would need to sign today. Folding his arms, Rai gave a hum, “Looks like we’re gonna have to play gymnastics with our shift today then” causing the girls to laugh once more. The trio then headed to the atrium and met with Elijah and Landry. They discussed their thoughts on what the senior residents might be like when Landry pointed them out. Turning, Rai recognized one of them as Dr. DeLarosa and the other was a broad man with tanned skin, a neatly trimmed beard, and a stern looking face.

Rai quickly learned that the two were pretty much night and day in terms of demeanor as he joined the group and soon learned the stern looking man was Dr. Zaid Mirani. The moment they announced they would be distributing cases, Rai slid over to Dr. Ines’ side, deciding it was better to go to someone familiar. “Hi, Dr. Hayashi! Remember me?” she greeted and Rai grinned, telling her it was alright to call him by his given name. Frankly, the orientation she gave as she handed him his cases was best described as bubbly sunshine.

Once he had his cases in hand, he happened to hear Jackie finish her talk with Dr. Zaid. He blinked and thought, “(And I thought Uncle Greg was strict)” before meeting with Jackie. Apparently, Dr. Zaid was best described as an ass, and when Rai had told her what Dr. Ines was like, she gave a shudder before stating she preferred working with the ass to Rai’s amusement. Later on after they were set off to their cases, Rai found himself paged to meet Dr. Ines along with his group of interns.

It seems that they would be starting their rounds now and Dr. Ramsey would be joining them. At that announcement, it looked as if Landry would burst and collapse from excitement at the same time. Suddenly, Dr. Ramsey wryly stated, “Let’s see who the interns are going to kill today” and Rai froze. “That’s uncalled for” he muttered, his eyes icy and fists clenched. Somehow, Dr. Ramsey seemed to have heard him, “Something to say, Dr. Hayashi?” he asked, clearly daring the intern to speak up.

Ignoring the awed whispers from the other interns over Dr. Ramsey knowing his name, Rai squared his shoulders. A crackle seemed to spark between the two as their eyes met, “Yes, actually” he started, “It’s only the second day. There is no need to make, frankly, crass statements to test our confidence” tone cold, he stood firm, not backing down from Dr. Ramsey’s gaze. Dr. Ines anxiously looked between the two and tried to defuse the tension and move things along. Then, Dr. Ramsey asked, “Has your confidence been tested then?”

“No, doctor” Rai firmly stated and the crackling tension seemed to settle into a quiet rumble. Dr. Ramsey nodded, “Good. Because if I scare you, then you aren’t remotely prepared for what you’ll face on a daily basis here” then a glint entered his eye, “Actually, why don’t we start rounds with your patient?” he rhetorically asks. Rai had no chance to answer before the group was led to a patient’s room. The man sat up as they entered, “Uh, are my eyes going, or are they multiplying?” he asked.

Dr. Ramsey, who had moved to the side, answered, “Good morning, Mr. Knoblauch. They multiply. It’s horrible.” As he said this, Rai mentally pulled at his hair while screeching over the whiplash the man was giving him with his attitude. Outwardly, he was as calm as can be as he reassured the patient and introduced the patient, Mike Knoblauch, and his case. The moment he gave the floor to Landry, he could see that the male was nervous with Dr. Ramsey. It didn’t help that Dr. Ramsey gave a retort to Landry’s stuttering.

Catching his fellow intern’s eye, he mouthed, “You got this” and mimed taking a deep breath. Landry shot him a grateful look before continuing with his presentation. He still stumbled a bit, but managed to relay the rest of the patient’s details. The moment he finished and Dr. Ramsey gave a nod of approval, Landry mouthed his thanks to Rai. Then, Aurora spoke up from behind the group, questioning their seriousness over the internal bleeding found. Rai nodded in acknowledgement of the question and answered it with his assessment. Mike then asked how long he would be stuck in the hospital.

He was rather upset hearing it would take it a week. What’s more, he was angered at the prospect of the hospital profiting from his prolonged stay. Rai was quick to sympathise with him and explain that they had to be careful, urging him to think of his son should something happen. Mike grumbled but relented at that. They then continued on with their rounds and by the end of it, Rai felt like flopping on the ground for a break.

He barely heard Dr. Ines’ congratulations and Dr. Ramsey’s warning to the group as his mind conjured a miniature version of him flopped on a cloud. When Landry came over to thank him for earlier, he gave a small grin and a thumbs up. Just as he was about to go for a water break, he sees Dr. Ramsey beckoning to him. “Not you Rookie, you’ve got one more to present” he told the intern. Mentally, Rai wailed as alarms rang out, but nodded nonetheless and followed the man.

They enter a room where a woman sits up and smiles at them. Even with her arm in a cast, her smile managed to light up the room. With her gaze at Rai she stated, “Please tell me, you’re my new doctor.” At that, Rai gave a chuckle before turning to Dr. Ramsey for confirmation. Upon hearing what happened to the patient’s previous doctor; Rai’s mind provided the mental image of Dr. Ramsey literally kicking a faceless man in a golf outfit with a stethoscope out of the hospital. He had to bite the inside of cheek to stop from laughing before he presented the case as instructed.

When he grabbed the chart, he did a quick read and his brows furrowed. “Patient is Kyra Santana, twenty-eigth years old. She has a fractured radius in need of casting” he paused as he caught Dr. Ramsey’s assessing look, “But you clearly know that already so that means there’s more to this” he muttered before flipping through the chart and scanning it. Spotting the anomaly he declared, “The main issue isn’t the broken arm, it’s her cancer, you brought me here to see if I could detect a bigger picture” before fighting a flush as he saw Dr. Ramsey nod in approval.

“You’re not completely hopeless then Rookie” he offered before lecturing, “The real problem isn’t always obvious. If it was, they’d let any idiot become a doctor” ending with a snort. Rai tilted his head and looked at Kyra, “If she’s here for a treatment, then… where does the broken arm come in?” he wondered.

Kyra gave a grin before explaining how she had been on her way to a C.T. when she spotted an abandoned bike at the side of the street. She had apparently always wanted to learn how to ride a bike and took it as a sign. Problem was, she was worse at riding a bike than she thought she was and ended up wiping out. Rai gave a laugh at the, “Well, at least no one can say you don’t have guts” he told her. She pointed at him and exclaimed, “Right?!” before the two were interrupted by Dr. Ramsey asking Rai what the treatment plan was. “Well, I’m sure she already has a treatment plan so I’ll get to work on casting her arm” he stated before Dr. Ramsey nodded and told him to do that before leaving.

Rai turned back to Kyra, "Alright then! Let's get that cast on you and send you for the scan. How's that sound?" He asked. “Tragic, for a first date” she responded and Rai barked a laugh. He ruffled his hair and told her, “An A+ for effort, would have worked if I didn’t bat for the other team.” Kyra gave a mock sigh and snapped her fingers, “Damn, they were right, all the hot guys ARE gay, taken, or both” she mused.

Rai gave a grin at that, "Ah, it usually depends, if it makes you feel any better, I don't really mind it” he consoled. A mischievous grin was his response, “Good. Then I’ll do it incessantly” she stated. Another laugh escaped Rai, “Just make sure you leave time to beat cancer” he joked to her. She seemed to dim at that and even tried to show a brave face by joking over living as much as possible with death near. Rai immediately corked that by encouraging her before urging her to give him her arm.

Once her arm was cast she thanked him by addressing him by his title before he told her to call him by his name. She grinned at that, brightening once more as she asked him to be the first to sign her cast. Considering what to write, Rai grinned before writing “Carpe Diem” and signing his name in kanji. Kyra peered at the characters and asked, “You didn’t write some weird phrase like they do with those character tattoos did you?” gesturing to the kanji Rai wrote.

Briefly adopting a look of mock hurt to make Kyra snort in amusement, Rai shook his head, “It’s my name” he explained, “My last name is written as forest while my first name is written as lightning” pointing to the respective characters. “Badass…” Kyra breathed before looking at Rai, “You know… I’ll be here pretty often, cancer and all, so…” her grin seemed to say it all. Rai gave an answering smile. “I’ll see you around Kyra, and hopefully with no more broken bones” he said as he left, laughing as he heard her call, “No promises!” when he stepped out the room.

Later as he was checking on other patients, he distantly heard the sound of something approaching. Due to years of learning when to dodge out of necessity, Rai had flattened himself against a wall before Dr. Ramsey even finished his yell of “Out of the way Hayashi!” and past him with several other staff wheeling a seizing patient on a gurney. When another doctor arrived to ask about the patient, Rai did a double take upon hearing him call Dr. Ramsey by his first name, Taking another look at the man, Rai blinked as he soon recognized him as Dr. Naveen Banerji; Dr. Ramsey’s mentor.

Rai knew that if he had a tail, it would be wagging wildly to match the stars in his eyes. “Trying not to fanboy there too hard Hayashi?” he heard a voice asks and turns to see Bryce grinning at him. Lightly smacking the surgical intern’s shoulder he huffed, “Jerk, we can’t all be as carefree as you” before sighing, “Man, I would have loved to see them in action.”

A mischievous spark entered Bryce’s eyes, “Who says you can’t?” he offered, raising his surgeon keycard. Realizing his implication, Rai turned to him with wide hopeful eyes, unintentionally giving the other male a puppy eye look. Bryce gave a chuckle at that before ruffling Rai’s hair and gesturing for him to follow. The two tried to not draw attention as they crept to the observation deck.

“I owe you one Bryce” Rai whispered as they settled in the room; “I’ll remember that” Bryce whispered back, a devilish grin on his face. Responding by sticking out his tongue at the other, Rai turned his attention to the O.R. As he mentally took notes, he heard Bryce murmur, “Where’s the fireworks? Are they gonna cut him open or what?” and he turned to give the surgical intern a deadpan look.

“Ha ha, always got to have the clever line don’t you?” he whispered. Bryce gave an unrepentant shrug, “Always” he whispered back, “But seriously, they’re standing around talking. Why didn’t you want to be a surgeon?” his question throwing Rai off. For a moment, Rai was silent, then he met Bryce’s eyes with his, “That’s… a story meant for another time” he murmured, a flash of sadness crossing his eyes as he said it. This seemed to surprise Bryce before he nodded in understanding and patted Rai’s shoulder.

Nodding his thanks, Rai turned his attention back to the diagnosticians, enraptured by the work they were doing. The different pieces soon came into place and Rai murmured out the problem and Bryce smiled, impressed. As the doctors finished up their analysis Rai murmured, “It’s no wonder they’re known as the best with skills like that” sighing in admiration. He then turned to Bryce and asked, “Is it okay if I ask why you became a surgeon?”

Bryce nodded, “Always liked fixing things. Appliances, stuff around the house, you know?” he explained and Rai gave a hum. He found himself looking at Bryce in a brighter light, “So you think people are like unique machines, sometimes needing a fix and with how different every person can be in different ways, fixing them is like… a new experience each time” he surmised and Bryce quietly exclaimed, “You get it!”

The surgical intern then perked when he noticed that the patient had been placed into his coma. He seemed to lean in closer for a better look, “They finally knocked him out? Nice. Now comes the cutting right?” he asked and Rai snorted. He knocked their shoulders together, “You’re incorrigible!” he muttered to him, nearly knocking Bryce over before they burst into giggles. At that moment, Dr. Ramsey glances up at the observation window. The two quickly duck down and with a pounding heart Rai hissed to Bryce, “Time to go.”

Bryce empathically nodded and the two quickly snuck out. Once they were back in the hallway, Rai gave a breathless laugh, “That… was great! Thanks again Bryce” he enthused to the other, grinning brightly. “Ah, as if I could say no to those puppy eyes of yours, and now you owe me one!” Bryce responded, cheekily pinching Rai’s cheek.

Playfully slapping Bryce’s hand away, Rai rolled his eyes, “Yes, yes, I’ll brace myself for whatever you got up your sleeves for me in the future, now shoo! We both got work to get back to. Bryce laughed before sneaking in a boop on Rai’s nose and running off with a wave. Giving another eyeroll, Rai went back to his rounds.

Later on, Landry and him checked on Mike and learned more details about him and even his son, they mulled over his condition. After considering all the possibilities and what they learned from Mike, the duo soon managed to find the problem. They soon relayed a treatment plan to the patient, with Rai assuring him that while it would take time and work, he would be able to get out of the hospital soon enough.

While the two did a mini (though slightly awkward on Landry’s part) celebration, they received a text from Sienna. Apparently the landlord had responded but if they didn’t go now, there was a high chance the apartment would go to someone else. Landry urged him to join Sienna and Elijah, stating that he would handle things at the hospital. After making sure it was really alright with Landry, he quickly set off.

It didn’t take long for the trio to be rushing towards the apartment building. Suffice to say, it was worth the rush when they were presented with the apartment. Just as they were imagining themselves in the beautiful place, the landlord, Farley, quickly dashed things down. Apparently a tech group had made a rather big bid on the place as well. It took some quick thinking but Rai managed to seal the deal once he and the others managed to convince the man they would be more reliable in terms of meeting rent and maintaining the apartment. Plus they sweetened the deal by adding in Sienna’s treats once a week.

Days later, Rai and his friends were happily settling into their new apartment when he realized that he had left his I.D. at the hospital. Well, it was lucky that it was only 10 minutes away now.

#open heart #oh fic #m!mc #m!mc x ethan ramsey #carrisa writes #in your eyes

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criquette-was-here · 4 years ago

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Long Awaited Replies

Hello everyone! It’s been awhile since my last activity here. Stuff’s just got real last few months and I am now experiencing some heavy RLS which makes the future of the whole Feverfew project quite uncertain. I’m very annoyed by the fact I have to move the release date over and over again, but, fingers crossed, I’ll be able to manage to make it this year. But before I post any updates, I need to answer my inbox!

@landgraabsims said:

feverfew is absolutely gorgeous!! is it inspired by any real-life places or towns? i live in england and it reminds me of a few in-the-middle-of-nowhere villages i've visited c:

Thanks @landgraabsims! Yes, Feverfew is based on British countryside aesthetics without any towns or villages in particular. It has a bit of everything, really. It’s a fantasy place after all. But I do use a lot of real life references for making landmarks for it.

Anonymous said:

any idea of the date of release for feverwood? just redownloaded sims 2 and im in loveee

Hey Anon! I’m glad you like it! I really hope to make it happen this year.

Anonymous said:

i would die (or pay) for zagoskin omg it looks like TS3

Oh, thank you, Anon!

@katzengirl said:

Hello Criquette! I don't have a challenge or a question or a request. I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate the things you've shared with us! I hope you're having a good day.

Hello Kristina! That is so sweet, thank you ^___^ I hope you’re doing fine too!

Anonymous said:

Hi there, Criquette. Been having fun with your Rural Charm set and the Better Lighting. Ran into one small problem with the RC. One of the narrow curves picks up the texture from a road section with a crosswalk, so that looks a bit odd (30degree inner?). And a question - is there a Better Lighting for the Iron Bracket street lamp with the seasons banner? Thought the iron bracket would work, but it's not. Anywho, Thank You for ALL the work you put into making our hoods look fantastic!

Hey Anon! Thanks! Depending on the road DR you’re using, there can be some texture issues here and there since Rural Charm is optimised for road texture without any markings (apart from the broken white line). As for the Iron light post with a banner – no. I’ve only made 2 Maxis’ base game lamp posts.

Anonymous said:

It's amazing how this one game embraces so many different types of players. I'm planning to create my very own nh from scratch, and I'd be a liar not to recognize how your game pics inspired me to the task (not to mention your ever impressive work of hood deco cc throughout these years). For all that, as much as I'm just another anon, thank you, sincerely. But that left me wondering: do you also/still play with the other ts2 game modes or they no longer interest you?

Oh, that is so kind, Anon. Thank you! Yes, I do love to actually play the game. I enjoy building/decorating lots as much as live mode. In fact, I often get carried away during playtest sessions and just keep playing in lot mode and that’s why there are lots like ‘The Tower Inn’ or ‘The Moose & Beaver’ or sims like Tilda Phidbach, WHT-FC28 servo and their field lab.

Anonymous said:

Criquette, do you know something about this project? thesims1master tumblr (the idea is to make the game look like the beta version. I ask, because I liked it so much, but I haven't been able to find the person behind it and I'm very curious to see more or download it, as well as his world, which I've been waiting for since last year lol)

Hey Anon! Oh, I don’t think I know anything about this project, no. But it looks rather interesting!

@forever-evenfall said:

Hey Criquette! I just downloaded your Lighting Remedy (because I only just realised I needed to change the txt file and not just download it lol) and when I placed your lighting text in the program files, the lighting itself worked, but the terrain itself was flashing red. Do you know what I did wrong? I literally don’t think I can play without the fix lol. I am using UC and I placed it in the Fun With Pets/SP9/TSData/Res/Lights folder. Should I have put it somewhere else?

Hello Eve! I might be wrong, but isn’t it Mansions & Gardens SP that stands for UC? Anyway, flashing red terrain is really weird consequence for just replacing a txt file. Neighborhood terrain doesn’t have any dynamic light. It has a light map instead which comes with Lighting remedy too. If you only just replace the lighting txt file without putting LR light map into your ‘Downloads’ folder, the only issue you should get would by unsynchronized light directions for hood decos and the terrain itself.

Anonymous said:

I'm having a problem: not all the decorations I put in the neighborhood are showing up in simulation mode, even with the fade off and the long-range vision on. I think there is some code that I need to add to the game files to make all the decorations appear. But I can't find how to do this: c Can you help me?

Hello Anon! Basically, there’s only one type of hood deco that isn’t showing up in lot mode and that is neighborhood effects. All the decals, flowers, fields, all the animated stuff (except for texture animation, e.g. Maxis’ marquee sign) is not showing up in lot mode. There’s nothing we can do about it. Yet. If you think that there’s a proper hood deco that isn’t showing up in lot mode, please PM me with some screenshots and we could try to sort it out.

Anonymous said:

Hello--Anon who asked about additional pieces for the Rural Charm set--I see now, thank you for explaining about the floating intersections. Is there anything you recommend then, to add on to existing roads? Otherwise, thanks for taking the time to explain.

Hello Anon! Oh, you’re most welcome. There is a tedious way to replace a texture on the existing tile of the real road, to make in into intersection so that it would connect better visually with decorative road pieces. But that takes time. What you have to do is to determine the tile you want to edit using technique described in this tutorial and then you have to change the texture name in the corresponding line. The texture names for the intersections (their index name parts) can be found in any road DR beforehand.

@sunradersimblr said:

Hi, I'm just wondering if you've ever done hood deco of a highway rest stop like the type we see in the U.S. along interstates and state highways, just a green space, usually, with toilet facilities and a place for a picnic and parking lot? I need one for a story and thought I'd check with you. Thanks for all the great work you share!

Hello Sunrader! That would be really nice addition for the highway set, but I haven’t made it. Thought it’s quite possible to make something similar if you use ‘One side exit piece’ from the motorway set and add some picnic tables, umbrellas and benches using street tables & benches set. There’s also many 4t2 deco conversions for toilets and other small size decos that would help to create a decent resting stop.

@nataliepop said:

Hi there Criquette! There's a new game called Townscaper which I think you'd like. The architecture has an English aesthetic and you build cities or towns but it all starts on an ocean. It's in early access, so I hope by the time it officially releases they add boats and piers. Look it up on Steam or Youtube. I saw it via someone who usually does Cities Skylines videos. Btw, have you ever played that? Also, apart from sims what else do you enjoy playing? Anyway, hope you are having a good day!

Hey Natpop! Thanks for a lovely game suggestion! I’ve checked it out and it looks really fun. Can’t say I’d play it though XD All my free time (which I don’t have atm) is reserved for simming hood deco making working on Feverfew ^^

Anonymous said:

hey~ i love all of your stuff, you're so talented (๑♡⌓♡๑) i wanted to ask, do you think you'll ever release feverfew's sc4 map?

Thank you Anon! That’s very kind. I’m not sure if there’s any point in releasing SC4 map I used for Feverfew because it’s completely differs from the way it looks now. The road layout is different, there’s no canal, no islands on the river, hills are different, etc. It has been heavily terraformed and edited during development process. I’d recommend just to wait till the Feverfew neigborhood release.

Anonymous said:

Hi! Do you have any idea of when Feverfew will be released? :)

Hey Anon! It will be released this year, hopefully!

Anonymous said:

Hello :D Is it possible to get your linden trees as lot objects in build/garden section? I love them and they beautify my neighborhood but could really use an option to select them on lots too :)

Hello Anon! Yes, that’s possible, though I can’t say if I could make it myself. What I can say though, is that there’s a linden trees redux coming soon. It would make linden trees look better and highly optimised so that it would only take 4,5 Mb instead of 60 Mb without any losses in texture quality and resolution.

#replies #anon #Feverfew #nataliepop #sunradersimblr #forever-evenfall #katzengirl #landgraabsims

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