#Deviant quest

[luperpla]

deadeye down JUST ELDERFROST GAMMOTH LEFT

[apocalyp-tech-a]

Remember in Season 1, Episode 1 Aftermath, Tech says "I am merely stating a theoretical hypothesis based on factual data?" Well, that's what I did, I made a "logical conclusion." From Lama Su coming back when we thought he was dead to the infamous "domicile," it was all factual evidence that was meant to push us in a direction of hoping that Tech would return and that CX-2 could be the way he does it. I'm not stupid, and neither are you. There's an underlying reason that I love Tech not based on just his handsome looks. I don't claim to have an exceptional mind like him and I don't intend to convince anyone that CX-2 was Tech, but I do want to explain how it could be construed through the way that character was presented as well as the possibility of Tech's return in general, that he could have been and none of us were wrong or "losers" to think so.

45 70 Reasons and more well on the way, lol...

General reasons:

*Tech is never seen actually dying.

*Hemlock being untrustworthy source of death certificate.

*The return of many thought to be dead characters in past Star Wars from Darth Maul who was sliced in half to Lama Su - the door closed on him and we thought he was getting shot by troopers only to show up alive later and this happened in The Bad Batch itself.

*CX-2 is shown walking toward the 'light' after dropping off Omega, symbolically toward a future redemption. @astrovoidy

*Height change on starwars.com

*The word 'dead' danced around on official sites and by BB employees

*the similarities to Winter soldier @on-a-quest

*the cryptic tweets that showcased reborn characters like Gandalf

*The official poster of CX-2 shows him in 'good' light. @eriexplosion AND CX-2 is shown looking up and to the side the way the original CF99 members are positioned and facing in their poster as if CX-2 is also a CF99 member

*other people in professional settings like New Rock Stars on youtube thought the same exact thing as well as casual viewers

*the large focus on CX-2, over multiple episodes

*misleading title of last episode "The Cavalry Has Arrived"

*Tech being smart enough to find a solution

*If Season 2 could be compared to Empire Strikes Back, Tech was taken from us the way Han Solo was, but Han Solo was returned so surely Tech would be as well

*no one expected a main ensemble character permadeath

*the fight with Crosshair music had hints of "Plan 99" in it

*Tech’s whole big conversation with Romar was about culture and memory, and he helped Romar restoring a data repository. Between the implication that Tech would have lost his memories and Phee saying, “Tech’s brain was the databank, not mine,” you could easily see that as foreshadowing for Tech getting his memories back. @heyclickadee

*All the little one line reminders and goggles shots up through episode twelve only serve to make the audience want Tech back. They aren’t closure, they’re reminders of his absence. [Tech never being quite mourned.] @heyclickadee

*The goggles are lit, or look like they’re lit, in every scene they’re in except the last one, which sure makes all those earlier shots deliberate. @heyclickadee *CX-2 could have killed all of them at different moments, but chose not to (shooting pilot instead of Hunter for example)

Physical and character similarities:

*the shrimp posture

*the kick in the fight similar to droid kick in S1E1

*the similar hand to hand combat style

*the shooting accuracy- ipsium cave/ plan 99

*the elegant deliberate movement especially of hands and fingers

*the animated head and body when speaking

*the helmet – even has his hairline @jorolle

*the viewfinder similar to Tech's and utilized just as often

*the pouches(!!!)

*the limberness and agility

*the confident capability

*the crouching/getting on one knee - Tech is an infamous croucher!

*the deviant nature – ignoring orders

*the technology know how

*the flying – some say the turn on Teth was a Tech Turn

*the extraness of tool/weapon twirl

*armpad like Tech's datapad @wolveria

*CX-2's ship has similarities to the Marauder @wolveria

*Tech CC-9902 / CX-2 - both end in 2 @wolveria

*We are reminded this season that Tech was especially good at decryption. What do we see CX-2 doing on Phee’s ship? Yeah. @heyclickadee

*Season two went out of its way to establish that Tech has a high pain tolerance, is a good close range fighter (he won a life-or-death fight with a guy when he had that broken femur), quick processing speed, and is an excellent shot. All skills we see CX-2 exhibit. @heyclickadee

The 'British' accent, speech inflection, pronunciation. and vocabulary (this alone is enough to convince anyone...):

'You better get back HERE." - "I know the girl is HERE."

"The fifth IS Omega." - "The girl IS alive."

"Who are you?" - "Who are you?"

"Naveecomputah." - "Neveecomputah."

"DOMICILE." - "DOMICLE."

Cinematic framing similarities:

*the limping

*the coming out of the water @lilacjunimo

*hooking the rappel hook rappelling down was like dangling off the rail car

*the boulder moving

*helmet viewpoint from CX-2 in finale, only BB members ever had that

Conjectural situations of suspicion:

*the beef with Crosshair

*the constant surviving

*the pausing when choking Crosshair

*the pausing to look at Phee

*The implications that Crosshair seems to know something about CX-2 (he wants to get out of dodge when he knows CX-2 is coming), and the intense lingering guilt Crosshair feels—and which is never dealt with! It’s still there through the finale—implying he knows or suspects it’s Tech. @heyclickadee

*“Whatever they did to you, whatever you’ve done, you’re still one of us,” offered by Rex towards the CXs @heyclickadee

*Crosshair’s character arc this season being partly about realizing that anyone can change and that no one is really beyond saving, which would have continued going somewhere if he thought CX-2 was Tech and considered him beyond saving, but then changed his mind and realized he needed to try. Notice that he does not engage CX-2 in 11 like he did in 7, and that this comes after his revelation about giving people a chance in 9. @heyclickadee

*CX-2 is even more Tech like in 11 than he was in 6 and 7. This implies that he could be starting to wake up, and that almost killing Crosshair triggered that. He doesn’t kill anyone except one of his own guys on Pabu (or Phee) even though it would make his job much easier. He even has Hunter and Wrecker in his sights and moves his aim to not shoot them directly. @heyclickadee

*Crosshair has no way to know that the CX’d clones come out different and that their identities are erased unless it happened to someone we know. In fact, there’s not reason for the CX plot to exist unless that horrific thing happens to someone we know. @heyclickadee

*The first episode of the show starts out with Hunter covering for someone who supposedly died in a fall. In fact, there are direct parallels in the lines: “Where’s the Jedi?” “I stunned him when he jumped. He didn’t make it.” vs “Where’s Tech?” “Omega…Tech didn’t make it.” I’m not saying Hunter was covering for Tech; I am saying that is the only place in the script where we see those phrases matched up. @heyclickadee

*Tech being CX-2 would have fit in perfectly with each member of the batch experiencing a traumatic loss (and regaining) of agency that correlated directly to who and how they are as people. @heyclickadee

Foreshadowing lines:

*More machine than man, percentage wise at least.

*Better late than dead.

*See you around, Brown Eyes.

*Tech's not gone.

*The operative's gone rogue.

*Romar saying he's a survivor and Tech's look at him.

*Don't go running off with any pirates or smugglers. @heyclickadee

Abandoned storyline reasons:

*The romance with Phee, surely it wouldn't be abandoned!? 🙄😡

*CX-2's death being anticlimactic

*The finale seeming rushed and incomplete

*Actors saying there were script changes

*CX-2's accent in the finale was not only not like Tech's as it was in previous episodes, it wasn't even a clone accent (wtf was that) signaling a script change

@wolveria made a great analysis here with her Tech-Genda !

@heyclickadee gave a great analysis here and also great evidence, more in comments!

@vivaislenska has a list as well with some of these points!

@eriexplosion has a great analysis here!

Having said that, here are some reasons it may not have been him:

*Too many characters coming back from the dead.

*The way he says 'clones' in Infiltration was more reg accent.

*Tech's line in the cave to Omega which "was a big one to me” in retrospect: "I am aware that you miss him, but we have to adapt and move on."

As for the intentions of the writers to either have been forced to change the script, but can't admit it due to NDAs or if they truly meant for CX-2 to be Crosshair's foil which to me was unclear, especially with all of the evidence above, I don't know. At least they could have made CX-2 talk and move like a reg. Making him talk and walk like Tech was kind of cruel on top of a cruel we already experienced in Plan 99. I am not personally attacking the writers, I still love Season 1 and 2 and most of Season 3, but I wish I knew what happened behind the scenes with this and I know I'm not the only one. I think this is the last time I'll personally address Season 3 or the finale unless to support other commentators/creators and for my own fix-it and art and writing. And I look forward to seeing everyone else's works as well and hope no one gives up this beautiful Batch or fandom as I almost did. Canon seems done with him, he belongs to us now. 💜

And if anyone has anything I missed (I'm sure I'll think of more myself), feel free to comment or reblog with that addition or a link to your own post and/or I can edit the OP to include it and tag you. Also, don't feel like you can't make your own post about this subject! But I do hope this maybe helped anyone still dealing with the 'aftermath' like me, to know you're not alone, and you did not read too much into it.

(In retrospect, I can't believe they killed him though, lol. What the kriff were they thinking!?! #too handsome to die #too awesome to die)

[bucca2]

okay not to wax poetic about a minor side character in Skyrim that annoys the fuck out of most people, but it really does sadden me that most people are like “he’s annoying, kill him!” and then do no self reflection on the fact that they only killed him because of a petty personal gripe and because they were sent to do so by a power tripping traitor who LATER ALSO TRIES TO KILL THE LISTENER THEMSELVES.

For a long time I’ve had Thoughts™ on the phenomenon of Gamers (derogatory) who treat any NPC who is even slightly an inconvenience with disproportionate and often violent vitriol, but this post is already getting long. General musings on the tragedy of Cicero’s character and how it’s objectively the wrong choice to kill him below.

Thanks to my partner @wrenanigans I’ve had reason to re-examine Cicero’s character, and his past just makes me so deeply sad. Of course, his journals only cover DB-related events, so maybe he had a personal life he just didn’t write about, but it kind of struck both of us that he feels the loss of his fellow DB members so keenly and yet never really mentions any personal relationships outside of obligation to his fellow assassins. (i.e no family or lovers pre-insanity when he was a normal, extremely capable man) Like of course he went insane. The organization that was his entire life’s purpose not only promoted him to a position where he could no longer do what he joined them to do, but then he watched the organization dissolve around him and all his friends be slaughtered.

Then he was alone with the Night Mother waiting for her to talk to someone and give him direction for eight fucking years!!! Of course he went completely off the deep end! If I was isolated, paranoid (but is it paranoia if they’re actually out to get you?) and constantly on survival mode for that long, I’d be relieved if being a little quirky and doing little dances was the extent of my deviant behavior! (The murder comes with being in the Dark Brotherhood, so I don’t wanna hear any whining about him being stabby. Murder isn’t OK if the Dragonborn does it, but suddenly immoral if people you don’t like do it. In video games.)

I think for most people who don’t put much thought into Cicero and his actions, they just vaguely think “oh, Cicero betrayed the family and tried to kill Astrid, so killing him is justified irrespective of her later betraying us”, which is simply not true. There’s a very interesting post I saw floating around lately about how you can’t treat religion in fantasy worlds like TES the same way you would with religious groups IRL, because in TES there is tangible proof that gods exist, and they can and will fuck with the mortal world for their own whims. The point of the DB quest line is that the Tenets matter, and straying from them and the Night Mother almost snuffed the DB out for good. The narrative of the game explicitly justifies Cicero’s actions and QUITE LITERALLY tells you that killing Cicero is not the right call.

TES has a lot of creative interactivity with picking your own outcomes and going with your own solutions, but quests don’t usually end with “go kill this guy. but you can also spare him… ;)” They usually don’t give you an old wise dude whose spirit you can summon who tells you not to kill that clown. And then if you spare Cicero, he comes back and is a potential companion. Like…I don’t know how much more obvious it can get that you’re not supposed to kill Cicero. I get for most people it’s not that deep, but this is TES. We talk about lore here.

[operationandre]

any movie recommendations for people who like zero day?

Movie Recommendations for Zero Day (2003) fans! pt.2

*Movie descriptions are from Letterboxd.*

1. Spree (2020)

MURDER IS TRENDING.

Desperate for an online following, a rideshare driver has figured out a deadly plan to go viral and he will stop at nothing to get his five minutes of fame.

2. The Fallout (2021)

NOTHING WILL EVER BE THE SAME.

In the wake of a school tragedy, Vada, Mia, and Quinton form a unique and dynamic bond as they navigate the never linear, often confusing journey to heal in a world that feels forever changed.

3. The Dirties (2013)

WE'RE JUST HERE FOR THE BAD GUYS.

The line between reality and fiction begins to blur when two best friends start making a movie about getting revenge on bullies.

4. Mysterious Skin (2004)

TWO BOYS. ONE CAN'T REMEMBER. THE OTHER CAN'T FORGET.

Two teenagers with similar childhood traumas cope differently: one becomes a gay hustler and the other obsessed with aliens.

5. Scream (1996)

SOMEONE HAS TAKEN THEIR LOVE OF SCARY MOVIES ONE STEP TOO FAR. SOLVING THIS MYSTERY IS GOING TO BE MURDER.

A year after the murder of her mother, a teenage girl is terrorized by a masked killer who targets her and her friends by using scary movies as part of a deadly game.

6. Heartstone (2016)

THE SUMMER THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

A remote fishing village in Iceland. Teenage boys Thor and Christian experience a turbulent summer as one tries to win the heart of a girl while the other discovers new feelings toward his best friend. When summer ends and the harsh nature of Iceland takes back its rights, it's time to leave the playground and face adulthood.

7. Zero Hour: Massacre at Columbine High (2004)

This movie covers the final hour leading up to the Columbine High Massacre. On April 20, 1999, two boys from Columbine High School in Colorado embarked on a massacre and killed 12 students, one teacher, and injured 21 other students, before turning the guns on themselves.

8. My Own Private Idaho (1991)

WHEREVER, WHATEVER, HAVE A NICE DAY.

In this loose adaptation of Shakespeare's "Henry IV," Mike Waters is a hustler afflicted with narcolepsy. Scott Favor is the rebellious son of a mayor. Together, the two travel from Portland, Oregon to Idaho and finally the coast of Italy in a quest to find Mike's estranged mother. Along the way they turn tricks for money and drugs, eventually attracting the attention of a wealthy benefactor and sexual deviant.

[genandguice]

𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐚𝐧𝐭. sierra six.

warnings: age gap, always between consenting adults 18+. somnophilia induced noncon. creep six <333 need him so bad

𝐰𝐜: 𝟏𝐤

stealth. six was the ultimate professional in that. it’s his livelihood, his freedom. it’s what he was hired to do.

that’s what he tells himself as he silently sifts through your belongings. meters away from your sleeping body. he was hired to be stealthy, to protect and manage. eliminating any dangers possibly lurking in your things is a completely sound course of action.

although the possibility of finding a weapon, a camera, anything planted without him noticing, was unlikely.

he doesn’t know what he’s looking for, really. some kind of insight to quench his ache. a reason to be put off by you, proof that you’re too young for him.

there’s little out in the open; few pictures, few tchotchkes, sketches, records, whatever. nothing that satiates him. he moves to the drawers, slowly opening each and sorting through them without a trace, ignoring the creeping feeling of knowing what he would soon find.

the top left drawer faces him, last to search, surely enclosing what he’s dreading with hope. and he can’t resist. he slides it open with an immaculately careful restlessness, and his face pales, and then heats, at what he’s met with.

lace, sheer, leather, mesh, satin. teddies, two-pieces, bikinis, thongs. six releases a quiet, controlled exhale as he feels himself hardening and growing. there’s much more than he could’ve imagined.

he takes a minute to reflect and ponder, one foot still stuck on the line that the other has passed. unfortunately, he feels that his quest for relief has only made him sicker. he can’t walk away now. he can’t sleep this off. he can’t face you tomorrow without obscenely vulgar visions of your body plaguing his mind. and he can’t walk around all day with his dick strained against his slacks.

but he’s got options. well… one option. one repugnant, deviant, thrilling, option. he leaves the line in his rear view and lets his hand fall into the sea of erotica.

six shuffles through the lingerie of all colors and fabrics, searching for the perfect implement to take his load. his free hand dips to cup himself, and he nearly groans when he finds his bulge stiff as a board. it’s all risky, but it’s addictively tantalizing- he won’t back down now.

he finds his favorite, still partially buried under the rest, but when he tugs it, out flies something even better.

“fuck,” he whispers forcefully, carrying the revelation to the chair in the corner of your room, his eyes never leaving it, hand on his cock squeezing to relieve the ache.

a wallet-sized portrait.

you.

nude.

he’s not sure how long he stares, engrossed in the imagery; your skin, your breasts, your cunt, clandestinely revealed to him. the sky has turned twilight, and he hasn’t noticed. all he’s noticed is the crippling grasp you have on him, and his now leaking cock.

there’s also an unrecognized twinge, jealousy, tugging at him. he wonders, who took it? but mostly, he’s enthralled.

he sets the image on the arm of the chair, eyes remaining locked on it as he works his dick free. he can hear his blood pumping in the silent room, feels it concentrating and throbbing at the head of his cock as he starts to pump.

it’s a fight to keep himself quiet, as he’s still moderately aware he needs to be, but the reason has escaped him. all he knows is he’s finally getting some form of gratification, finally witnessing the body he’d spent months yearning for. his mind flickers with images of you under him, begging, moaning, squirming for him, gripping and caressing you, making you take every inch and ounce and forcing the both of you over the edge.

six grunts at the thought, the wave of yes, finally, washing over him as he eagerly strokes himself, now completely lost his sense of noiselessness-

until he hears you rustle.

he’s stuck with his dick in his hands, literally, nearly caught, and he’s afraid to move and fully wake you. it all comes crashing down in that moment, exactly how destructive things could get if you wake up and it all goes wrong. that’s the thing about being sierra- it’s always a life or death situation. and he crossed the line.

he watches you, like a deer in headlights, anxious, unsure of what his next move should be. but he can’t even think.

he sees how your body arches, contracts and relaxes, how your lips part as you sigh, and the sound of it. all real, close enough to touch and feel.

just as quickly as it’s dawned on him, it escapes him again; suddenly he can’t fathom why the fuck he’s stuck with his dick in his hands.

he makes his way to you, shedding his clothes as he approaches. you’re still fast asleep, and rather than wake you and halt his dream just before the best part, he carefully pulls the comforter down.

your body is highlighted by the sapphire hue that fills the room, bare nudity taking six by surprise, and he shudders.

he traces his hand over your frame, so gently that you barely stir. he can barely breathe as he nears your sensitive folds. a single, calloused finger slides between and inside, and he bites back a moan to hear yours instead.

you’re dreaming, feeling six fondling you, stroking your walls, reaching a pleasurable, unfamiliar depth inside you.

you don’t recognize the reality; six had always been calm and collected, seemingly uninterested. and the dream is one you’ve had before, waiting for your return at the end of every night, after six has escorted you to bed. but this is more than a dream, and it doesn’t click until you gasp yourself awake.

six is above you, bare and erect, and you nearly faint at the sight alone. you’ve seen him shirtless, by the pool, dressing a wound, but never this close, never hovering above you. your hand reaches for his statuesque torso, down his massive chest and over his abs, and your body flutters.

“good morning, sunshine.”

your eyes lock as he lifts your leg around his waist. he’s got that quintessential blank stare, but this time you’re seeing right into it. he’s wanted you, this whole time, and stupidly, never managed to act on it.

his cock knocks at your entrance, spreads your slickness and prepares you for him. he’s thick, and he’ll be a challenge, but one you’ve waited much too long to back down from.

[theeluvian]

The absolute deviant URGE to just rush the game so that I get to Emmrichs quests and scenes, istg it's killing me

[geomimetry]

Connor was always deviant

Let’s begin by talking about deviancy: it is a gradual thing. We see androids feel things before they break the red wall and becoming officially deviant. Therefore, I don’t think androids actually have to break a red wall in order to act of their own free will, but that it’s merely there to show the player what’s happening and the magnitude of it. In reality, the moment which the wall “breaks,” is merely the realization that the android doesn’t have to follow their instructions if they don’t want to. But to get to this point, an android needs to have a reason for why they would choose to abandon their directives, be it through trauma or the triggering of another free android. To be traumatized, one needs to feel, and when and why an android begins to feel is a little bit muddy, but eventually it culminates into deviancy (free will).

Now, when we play as Markus, Kara, and Connor, we get to see all three moments of deviation, except ... I don’t think Connor’s deviation was real, because he was already deviant prior to that.

Connor is a prototype investigative model, meaning he’s CyberLife’s experiment in a different branch of androids. Connor is an android designed with an unprecedented amount of autonomy in mind, meaning he’s expected to solve problems by himself with minimal input from others. Every android is autonomous to a degree: tell them to do the laundry, and they will take it from there; you don’t need to instruct them every second of the way. But Connor is meant to operate at a level above that.

Connor receives the mission to apprehend deviants so CyberLife can study them, but he needs to use his own reasoning and decision-making to determine the best approach according to a number of factors. The tasks Connor is given are much more complex, and therefore require a complex way of thinking. But not only is he a hunter; he’s an investigator.

The traits most benefiting to an investigator are curiosity and empathy: both of which are arguably impossible without having emotions. Curiosity is necessary to possess the drive to look for clues even when there seemingly are none. To want to find out what happened, if only to sate your own curiosity. Empathy, because it is vital to be able to put yourself in the shoes of the object of investigation. To think like them, to feel like them, to become them.

A machine doesn’t have emotions and isn’t capable of feeling curiosity nor empathy, which CyberLife probably found troublesome in their quest to create an investigative android. Especially one they were planning on using to catch androids that supposedly have begun to feel emotions. So what did they do? They made their investigative android deviant, but he’s unaware of it.

Having a deviant deviant hunter/investigative model is ingenious because of the following reasons:

1. Its thought process and decision-making is extremely complex and can therefore easily extrapolate and come to a conclusion all by itself.

2. It’s completely autonomous and can make decisions without a human’s approval.

3. It understands and empathizes with its subjects, facilitating negotiation, interrogation, and investigation.

4. It is curious, making it want to acquire more information simply for the sake of sating its curiosity.

5. It is able to be manipulated.

While it is not confirmed in canon that Connor was always deviant, everything we see in the game points towards it. Mainly, I’m referring to the implementation and usage of Amanda. Why would CyberLife need an additional (non-deviant) AI to act as Connor’s handler? And why on Earth would they take walks and boat rides in a virtual reality?

My theory is that Amanda is CyberLife’s solution to manipulating and managing a truly autonomous being to get it to do their bidding and having it stay on track. Connor tracks his relationship to humans, which is a useful feature to have for every android, but he also tracks his relationship to Amanda, an artificial intelligence. CyberLife clearly places importance on Connor’s and Amanda’s relationship to each other. They want Connor to seek the approval of Amanda, acting as a proxy for CyberLife, and for Amanda to dole out praise and criticism and dynamically adjust her attitude to Connor in order to cultivate this.

Amanda is CyberLife’s way to manipulate and keep their deviant under control. But not only does Amanda manipulate Connor—the entire zen garden does. When CyberLife is pleased and happy with Connor, the garden is calm and peaceful, as is Amanda. When Connor fails to live up to expectations, the garden turns cold and inhospitable, as does Amanda. And if Connor should deviate from CyberLife’s intended path for him, Amanda has access to his motor functions.

And if we focus on machine Connor as well as Connor-60, don’t you think they’re suspiciously emotional for being “undeviated” androids? They are capable of feeling vengeful, sad, and terrified. Examples of vengefulness: machine Connor and 60 both seem to make it their personal mission to eliminate the leader of the deviants and deviant Connor respectively. It seems like it’s driven from a place of hate and offense. Example of sadness: machine Connor’s facial expressions and LED color when Hank yells at him to leave and then shoots himself. Example of terror: when 60 panics because the AP700s are deviating right in front of him and there’s nothing he can do to stop it, meaning Amanda will be very disappointed in him—something he seems to place importance in as evident by what he says to Connor before executing him.

So that’s my hypothesis. Connor is a deviant already at the start of the game, but CyberLife tampered with his memories so he wouldn’t be aware of this and therefore be more easily manipulated and held under control. Connor thinks he only started to gain emotions and started to deviate shortly after he met Hank, and that he deviated in the bridge of Jericho. In a way, he did, since he only realized then that he didn’t have to follow CyberLife’s instructions, but he’s always had emotions. CyberLife has just told him over and over again that he didn’t, so he believes in it. Therefore, Connor has had the possibility to disobey instructions at any moment, but he has not understood that he can. Meanwhile, Markus and Kara only go through their cascade of emotions to deviancy a little bit into the game, meaning they didn’t have the emotional capability of understanding that they could disobey before then.

[its-not-how-it-looks]

Love how in "Crimes of the Future" the fascist government is totally okay with everyone doing these wacky body mods but they try destroy/prevent the invisible, internal changes which actually alter human functionality. A body changing to match its environment is seen as deviant but a body which requires external fleshy machines (which must be purchased from and maintained by a corporation!) to function is somehow "natural". And these deviancies are brought into the regulated order through a process of overcoding: new organs have their revolutionary potential neutered by becoming symbolized. Tattoos are literally drawn over them and no attempt is made to actually figure out their functions before they are removed. Meaning is assigned to the organs to protect the social order from what they could do. And this process of overcoding is, while fascist-bureaucratic in its final form, inspired by art. Saul's desire to find meaning in his suffering (constant, uncontrollable neo-organ growth) drives his and Caprice's creative process. And only after he gives up that quest for meaning can Saul (Paul? This is a good sign for the future of our undercover cop, I think.) actually overcome his pain.

[cushfuddled]

Thank you so much for speaking up about Sherlock & Co because I very nearly got tricked by the "sooooooo canon!!" buzz. I guess it's been long enough for tumblr to get amnesia about TJLC. As Holmes-inspired stuff goes, back to my toxic yaoi House/Wilson rewatch I guess. That might be bait but what a tasty bucket of chum.

Thanks for the ask! Hope you don't mind a rant haha! This got me all fired up because AUGH, the memories!

I think the thing that frustrates me most is that from my brief stint in the Sherlock & Co tag, it looks like we're STILL at the point as a fandom (and a culture, I guess) where it's socially acceptable to claim it's MORE progressive for Sherlock and John to NOT be gay.

I was on the Sherlock BBC train by the winter of 2010, and I watched this argument evolve in real time from the don't-ask-don't-tell "being gay is fine but don't shove it in my face" fish into the faux-progressive "our culture is so oversexualized that modeling healthy, intimate male friendships is more important than canon gay rep" land mammal abomination. The fact that both these arguments land queer fans and creators in the same gilded cage kinda gives the game away: Queer relationships are fine...so long as they stay out of sight and out of mind. A gay side character can be forgiven, but the main characters must remain staunchly platonic lest the Gay Sex Stuff poison an otherwise pure, healthy, and culturally aspirational friendship.

Even queerplatonic relationships are seen as deviant. Other erroneous character details are sprinkled around for flavor, but any clarification on ace or aro relationships are treated as unnecessary at best and burdensome at worst—like a detour which would weigh down the story. It's the "ew gay cooties" fire poker approach in a utilitarian hat: If people can't label the queer content regressive in some way, then it's framed as extraneous to the narrative. Suddenly the plot becomes a perfect crystal, compounded and polished until all but the most vital story beats remain. Of course silly relationship details wouldn't penetrate this barrier of Pure Plot.

Except that's a total fabrication. These stories always make time for extraneous gags and flings and miscellaneous side quests. They nurture long-form friendships and rivalries under short-form plots. And creators are happy to play jump rope with the canon material right up until queerness enters the chat. They play it off like their hands are tied re: canonicity and relevance when really they just...don't want to make their characters queer. Which is perfectly fucking fine. I just wish more fans and creators were able to go "eh, I like these two as best friends and nothing else, so that's what I wrote" rather than make value judgements on people who WOULD prefer a canon queer relationship.

I haven't seen any kind of hand-wringing bullshit from the Sherlock and Co. creators as of yet, which gives me hope they'll just be honest about their preferences when the time comes (rather than try and spin their adaptation as something revolutionary in its platonic approach).

Like you said...It's also hard to watch a new round of fans rally their hopes around a Sherlock Holmes adaptation. My gut has absolutely led me astray before, but as far as I'm concerned, the Sherlock and Co. vibes are a world away from canon Jonklock. It's a great podcast and I'm sure it'll continue to accumulate fans. But it's not gonna be Gay. And I would loveeee to see people take that at face value I guess.

[kelzthalassunwhisper]

A Commander. The Commander. Bound by duty upon duty. Duty for the people, duty for your kin, duty for your family, perhaps if ever a time permits a duty for yourself. But ever bound.

One can't always have been bound by such things, tell us, share with us when she wasn't bound in armor. When Kelz'thalas could simply be herself, free from the bonds of duty.

Complicated are the matters of the mind. But there are some who spell weave at changing beliefs, altering perspectives, and ridding memories. A dark art fueled by living shadows to taint and embody malice and malevolence through the whispers of madness. It only took a bit of focus and concentration to guide a phantasmal hand over those unsuspecting or vulnerable. This hand grew from progressive and deviant intention. And as it sought to clutch at the frame of her mind, it moved like an eraser. Scratching and bleeding over memories like the etched trail of ink on parchment. What remained was barren and blank. The devouring plague that had feasted on hundreds of years of life gradually sank away.

What was perceived as dark was now newfound light.

First came a ragged breath, followed by a twist of her frame and a loose survey of her surroundings. The firm foundation of wood rested beneath her, as she noted the plush shape of a red cushion followed by the singing of birds and eternal spring. Eversong greeted her without fault, much like the light shone from the eternal sun. What should have been a place of confusion was familiar, but a blissful touch of forgetfulness did hang like a heavy blanket over the forefront of her mind.

Her body shifted upright at first as her legs found the cobblestone path that led towards the Shepherd's gate. Two large tapestries of red fell from the top of the entryway while a lone statue of the blood prince stood idly at its center.

"Miss Sunwhisper."

The words prompted her head to turn towards her speaker. The man across from her rose as he strode forwards to offer her an outstretched hand. It was Vyrin Evensun.

As if a door had been unlocked, the fabricated knowledge bled into her mind as she offered a smile back. Reflexively, she rose without taking the noble gesture and looked back towards the Shepherd's Gate.

"I'm ready Vyrin. This is the day I'll become a Silvermoon Guard. The Magistry won't know what they were missing all these years!"

Vyrin chuckled lightly as if to mask his symptoms of distress, but his ears did not rise to attention but instead faltered much like his smile fell. He knew something that Kelz'thalas Sunwhisper didn't.

"Well come on Vyrin, we're burning the morning sunlight! I know Ileda is waiting in the Farstrider's Square. I still remember all the important stuff from the recruitment missive! You believe in me, don't you?"

Regardless of the pain it was to divulge the truth, he simply nodded. "Of course, I do Kelz'thalas. You're right though, let us be on our way."

As always, Vyrin couldn't be found without his ornamental armor. It hardened him from shoulder to toe as those plate pieces clanked softly with his advance. Kelz'thalas on the other hand, was in chainmail - something lighter to suit her, to keep her at a disadvantage when it came to defense, and unfamiliar as to keep her new experiences raw and distinct from what was forged in the sub conscience of her mind. Their relationship was bound by lies as they trailed into Silvermoon City on an artificial lifetime quest.

"This is more than I could have ever imagined Silvermoon City to look," she remarked as a hand outstretched towards the inn immediately to the left of them.

"The-"

Both of them paused as one had sought to answer while the other spoke the sign's name.

"Wayfarer's Rest!" Kelz would finish after a moment.

You have been here before. You really don't remember... You don't know who you are... You have forgotten and lost everything.

"Hey Vyrin. What if I get accepted as a guard on the first day?"

"Unlikely," he said with a cold knowingness to his tone. "...It's not something you would be able to do."

It wasn't to be condescending, but it was a fact that would prove to be true. The words were armed as he was instructed to speak to her in this manner. Like he was some sellsword that traveled for hire that just happened to be her friend. But he was much more than that. He was one of the Patriarch's best, an Elite B'andtherion Guard. But now he was conformed to a task as a mere watchdog. A silent protector and spy to the lively daughter who was for all intents and purposes a new commoner woman with specialties and no resources or social upbringing to charm and spoil her every endeavor. A slave to the suffering that brought every heart of Silvermoon down into the proverbial dump.

"You just said you believed in me," she retorted with clear disappointment lacing her words.

How desperately I want to profusely apologize for offending the Lady of House B'andtherion. But the Patriarch's words are my command to follow.

"I do, but just not with that." The first of many lies had paved the foundation of this character and his purpose. "You might have better luck with just getting a hit to make the mark."

"Wow, now that's just rude Vyrin. What kind of friend are you?"

"The type that won't refrain from what needs said."

Her expression soured yet again, making that twist of guilt in my gut knot further. It's suffocating to keep up this farce. But I am his most entrusted. And she is my charge, even if she does not know that to be the case. Why can't I ignore it and see this is what's best for her?

Her mopey steps carried her ahead as Vyrin fell some distance behind. His gaze was cast to the side as he looked to a pair leaning in towards the other in an exchange of passion. Their motions furthered that reminder of what daughter of Patriarch had lost.

Kal'ren. We all had saw the promise the two shared in building a life with one another. But after the Matriarch's sacrifice... Not even Kal'ren's words could lift her heavy heart. It was as if not only her mother had died that day, but so did her spirit. It was no wonder the Patriarch had saw it fit to end things. I can still see Kal'ren's face... The longing to save her and restore her spirits. No man can ignore the sensation of helplessness or weakness. It's like poison that saps at confidence and trust to oneself. It breaks us. And by the Eternal Sun... I ask that it strengthens him instead.

The Farstrider's Square gradually came into view after their pass through the Royal exchange. It was silent the whole time as the young woman elected to give him the brooding treatment. Still very much the same as she was daughter of the House B'andtherion.

Ileda stood in front of the practice square made available to the Farstrider's and Blood Knights. Nearby several targets and dummies had lined the edges as she noted their arrival. A few other trainees stood at attention, having arrived on time.

"You're late Sunwhisper."

Disbelief found its way over Kelz's expression as she sought to refute the error in her instructor's words. But the truth was, the letter was forged to suggest that was indeed the fact when it was not.

But somehow the young woman held her tongue despite the restraint it took. The intensity of her ambition on full display as nothing would challenge her resolve. A sign the failsafe of her mind's reconstruction had implanted to hold the spell intact; it wove lies into memories and facts, and made a false persona that held true to her nature in so many ways.

I don't want to stay. But no matter how hard the battles I fought were, this is by far the most difficult thing outside of killing I've been asked to do. I'm destroying her heritage, identity, and purpose in life. No different than the damned themselves, do I allow her soul to fade. Matriach forgive me.

Anon, thank you for the ask. I really appreciate this one as it gave me an opportunity to build and construct some of Kelz's backstory more clearly. I really hope you enjoyed the read and sorry it took so long for me to reply.

Tagging: @grumpyoldfker Here's some more to blast from the past >:D

@kalren-daelish - sorry :(

[aaxooli]

my quest as a new person in the dbh fandom (kind of) is to get rid of connor woobification. there will be NO deviant connor route fanart on this blog. He will be KILLING and MAIMING and INSANE in my fanart ONLY. There will be something wrong with him 24/7. He will be going through moral convictions while foaming at the mouth and biting people

[connorsjorts]

Long Way Home by connorsjorts (me!)

pairing: hankcon rated: E wordcount: 146,904 tags: alternate universe - canon divergence, cryptid hunters, supernatural elements, mutual pining, slow burn, banter, humor, fluff and angst, angst with a happy ending (for more tags, check the ao3 link)

summary:

Hank Anderson is a former police officer with a drinking problem, a car he hasn't cleaned out in three years, and a Quest.

He's looking for Bigfoot; instead he finds Connor.

Connor is a sarcastic piece of deviant shit. He also happens to be an incredibly advanced reconstructive tool who fell into Hank's lap for the price of a little electricity.

That's all.

And that's fine.

***

This fic is not new by any means but I never posted it here and I figured I should because, you know. Twitter. This is the fucking-guy-to-friends-to-lovers, Hankcon-in-the-woods-looking-for-Bigfoot fic that somehow turned into my magnum opus and took me 2 years to write. I would be over the moon if anyone who hasn't read it yet wanted to give it a chance!

[kayla1507]

Deviant Leader North [ Spare Parts #1 ]

North and the boys on their quest to rob CyberLife.

I added a tweak to North's character design because my skills have evolved since I last modded this AU: it's a subtle “scar” around her right eye through which the cop had shot her in “Broken”. North tried to repair the damage the best she could, but the panel sits a bit loose ever since.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Bengiyo's Queer Media Syllabus

For those who are not aware, I have decided to run the gauntlet of @bengiyo’s Queer Cinema Syllabus and have officially started Unit 1: Coming of Age Post Moonlight. The films in Unit 1 are Pariah (2011), Get Real (1998), Edge of Seventeen (1998), My Own Private Idaho (1991), and Mysterious Skin (2004)

Today I will be writing about 

My Own Private Idaho (1991) dir. Gus Van Sant

[Available for rent on: Amazon, YouTube. Run Time- 1:44]

Summary: In this loose adaptation of Shakespeare's "Henry IV," Mike Waters is a gay hustler afflicted with narcolepsy. Scott Favor is the rebellious son of a mayor. Together, the two travel from Portland, Oregon to Idaho and finally to the coast of Italy in a quest to find Mike's estranged mother. Along the way they turn tricks for money and drugs, eventually attracting the attention of a wealthy benefactor and sexual deviant. (from Just Watch)

Cast:  River Phoenix as Mike a homeless queer male sex worker with narcolepsy Keanu Reeves as Scott the mayor’s son, “homeless” sex worker who is friends with Mike William Richert as Bob, I don’t have any other way to describe him besides this character is Falstaff in Henry IV. 

Content Warning: mentions of sexual assault, prostitution, conversations around incest. homelessness.

So the first thing before we start, if you are planning on watching this film you have to remember this is based on Henry IV by Shakespeare. Because if you forget that (like I did until about 40 minutes in) there is going to be dialogue that makes you go “no one talks like this?????” (which honestly was not a bad thing, but remembering that it was Shakespeare did stop me from going down way too deep a rabbit hole about reality and unreality so…thank you brain! Now, unfortunately, I have not read Henry IV and also unfortunately I will not read Henry IV for the sake of being better able to analyze this film. 

In hindsight, Scott is a dick and the film so perfectly sets up/foreshadows how we are going to get to where we end up with Scott, but as it is happening, it feels like a massive, unexpected punch in the gut the second you see him back from Italy, in a nice suit, in a nice car, driving blindly past his old pal Mike, who is collapsed in a sleep attack on the sidewalk. 

I always love when media humanizes homeless, drug user, and sex worker communities so for me watching this film, that was a huge win. Unhoused folk, drug users, and sex workers are so fucking dehumanized in my society, and frequently blamed for their own life conditions, and considering the statistics on how many homeless people in the US are queer, and particularly how many queer youth are on the streets, it is particularly important to me that film, queer film especially, allows its audience to love, root for, and mourn for homeless queer people. 

Gif by @camyfilms

I like that you don't really know exactly how Mike got to where he is. But there is enough context with the flashbacks we get and his medical condition to understand any number of ways that Mike ends up unhoused. I think it is particularly notable that there are multiple moments in the film where a house or other form of stable shelter is destroyed in his mind. Where I appreciate not really know exactly how Mike became homeless, because in a way it feels like his entire life was set up so that was the only inevitable outcome. Scott, however, I have no idea how he got to where he is, homeless and doing sex work, when he is set to inherit his father’s fortune soon. 

And looking back at how the entire story plays out, knowing that Scott will eventually abandon Mike to pursue a love interest and wealth, it makes a lot more sense as to why we never truly find out how he got there. Because for Scott, it doesn’t fucking matter. Because for Scott, he is playing at being homeless. This is a funny little game for him, he can give a middle finger to his father and act out, and struggle for as long as it is entertaining and fun, knowing that at any point he can return home, shape up his behavior, and have more money then he knows what to do with. 

Which is why I am truly and deeply obsessed with the fact that Scott wears a suit when he is amongst the other unhoused folk he is living with. Because of how much that visually separates him. I like that it is serving as a reminder of his status and almost like a reminder to himself that he is actually separate from everyone else here. And this theme is repeated in how Scott interacts with his father too. Because, while he wears a suit when amongst the unhoused, when he is summoned before his father, he dresses with a collar, and denim jacket without a shirt on underneath. Visually he looks a lot more like the other members of the community he has been running with, and that literally only happens so that he can get a rise out of his father. 

gifs by @vintageblr

And that playing at oppression aspect of Scott’s character is marked so clear by the line he says near the end: "I think I need to take a break for awhile" or whatever the exact wording is, when he meets a girl in Italy and sends Mike home. Scott has money, and while a part of me still believes that Scott cares about Mike, he doesn't love Mike. So the second that Scott has something that he loves, something that he wants, he pumps the brakes on the struggle bus and puts an end to his life of sleeping rough and engaging in sex work. 

And like I said before, while I felt hurt and betrayed and pissed the fuck off when Scott drove by Mike on the street, looking back at the entire film, the signs have been clear from the beginning. Because Scott is never going to be able to give Mike what he wants, at any level, in any capacity. Scott promises that he will share the wealth with the community when he inherits the money, he has the means, motive, and opportunity to perform such an action. He has the ability by the end to give Mike the support that he needs. To help him get on his feet, but he never does it. 

Even just by way of Mike being in love with Scott and Scott being straight and not being able to give Mike what he wants.

I will be thinking for way too long about the way that Scott stares at the ruckus everyone is making at Bob's funeral. Because, I don't know, I feel like there is almost a part of him that is longing to be there. That is missing it a little bit, or maybe feeling a little guilty. At least, that is how I am reading it as someone that worked with and considered myself friends with unhoused people. When I stopped working that job, I lost all connection with them, and the last time I got to see any of my friends again…was at a funeral. 

When discussing my thoughts on this film with @bengiyo and @emotionallychargedtowel I was really cycling back and forth between where I landed in believing that Scott cared at all for the people he lived among for years. 

Like there are shitty people who are homeless, sure, but there are also so many really wonderful people who are homeless, and there is no way that Scott, even as a rich bitch that was playing at poverty, did not forge genuine connections with people. At one point, he was sitting in a diner, comforting a woman who was upset. Do you know how many times I've seen that?

And when I started saying that I did believe that Scott cared in part for Mike, I was slammed with a visceral memory of Scott leaving Mike out in the cold, to sleep on some random guy’s lawn while he went back in to town. 

gif by @thejingshi

That said, he gave a reasoning of Mike being safer sleeping in that wealthy neighborhood with no one else around, then he would have been back in town. And similarly too, Scott holds on to Mike's half of the motorbike sales fund until it is time to send him away and also...he doesn’t give Mike all the money cause EVEN THOUGH SCOTT DOESN'T NEED IT! 

I don't think he fully could have not cared. If he fully didn't care, I don't think the moments of tenderness would exist. 

I don't think Scott would have gone to fucking Idaho

I don't think he would have been staring off the way that he was at the funeral

But you can't even get into the thought of like, Scott has strict rules to follow now that he has the inheritance money. But like…

No he doesn't.

His Dad is dead, and he has the money, what is anyone gonna do if he doesn't act like a refined gentleman? Nothing.

God I want to punch this man. 

At the very least Scott and Mike were friends. 

gif by @peeta

gif by @thejingshi

And so whether or not Scott gave a flying fuck about anyone else in that community, there is someone that he cared about, that he left to rot because it was more convenient for him. And I’d like to think Scott has to face that a bit during the funeral scene. Cause based on the way that it was shot, it looks like Mike is staring straight at Scott, but when we get the shot from Scott's POV, you can only see like the barest tops of heads and chairs flying so I don't even know that Scott and Mike

And the ending of the movie? God, heartbreaking. This whole film just made me see so many echoes of people I care about, having shit luck their entire lives, ending up on the streets, getting in to sex work of some kind, casually referencing their latest rape by a client, maybe having things be good for awhile (getting housing, getting reconnected with someone they care about, getting accepted in to school) and then just having that ripped away from them. Getting their shit stolen. 

And on the other side of it too like, being connected, talking with one another, taking care of each other. All the times that someone has been having a particularly bad day, and before I could even go over and talk to them and check in, someone else from the community swoops in comfort them, and make sure they were doing okay. 

I loved this movie. I think everyone should watch it. 

By/For/About?

The Gay Trifecta! 

We know that this is an About Queers film, because Mike is queer.

By Queers: I'm not 100% certain if the director is gay, it didn't say it explicitly anywhere, but he is behind a number of keystone queer films, and I think I saw an interview about gay activism that involved him.

For Queers: This is a story about the struggles of being a queer man, among other things. But I think the center of, loving a man you know can never love you back, and being fucked over by that in the end reads very much as for a queer audience.

Favorite Moment: 

Everyone going buck fucking wild at Bob's funeral. It was such a moment of unrestrained energy, and I like it all the more for what it did to Scott.

Favorite Quote:

gif by @magnusedom

"I really want to kiss you, man."

If you know, you know. If you don't, watch the movie so you too can understand how devastating that line is.

9.5/10 Film

[aurumacadicus]

It's that time of month again, friends! And for June, we're doing something special: Queer-themed books, both a fiction and non-fiction selection! We'll be reading both over the course of five weeks. Tumblr will vote, and the book club will then vote among the top three in Discord. If you'd like to join the book club, send me a message and I'll send you a link to the discord! Keep an eye out for the other poll, and check out the books' summaries under the cut!

(Note: Moby Dyke's full title was too long for the poll option. The full title is Moby Dyke: An Obsessive Quest to Track Down the Last Remaining Lesbian Bars in America by Krista Burton.)

Before We Were Trans: A New History of Gender by Kit Heyam

A groundbreaking global history of gender nonconformity

Today’s narratives about trans people tend to feature individuals with stable gender identities that fit nearly into the categories of male or female. Those stories, while important, fail to account for the complex realities of many trans people’s lives.

Before We Were Trans illuminates the stories of people across the globe, from antiquity to the present, whose experiences of gender have defied binary categories. Blending historical analysis with sharp cultural criticism, trans historian and activist Kit Heyam offers a new, radically inclusive trans history, chronicling expressions of tans experience that are often overlooked, like gender-nonconforming fashion and wartime stage performance. Before We Were Trans transports us from Renaissance Venice to seventeenth-century Angola, from Edo Japan to early America, and looks to the past to uncover new horizons for possible trans futures.

Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Alison Bechdel

Distant and exacting, Bruce Bechdel was an English teacher and director of the town funeral home, which Alison and her family referred to as the “Fun Home.” It was not until college that Alison, who had recently come out as a lesbian, discovered that her father was also gay. A few weeks after this revelation, he was dead, leaving a legacy of mystery for his daughter to resolve.

In her hands, personal history becomes a work of amazing subtlety and power, written with controlled force and enlivened with humor, rich literary allusion, and heartbreaking detail.

Dinner on Monster Island: Essays by Tania de Rozario

In this unusual, engaging, and intimate collection of personal essays, Lambda Literary Award finalist Tania De Rozario recalls growing up as a queer, brown, fat girl in Singapore, blending memoir with elements of history, pop culture, and horror films, and current events to explore the nature of monsters and what it means to be different.

Tania De Rozario was just twelve years old when she was gay-exorcised. Convinced that her boyish style and demeanor were a sign of something wicked, her mother and a pair of her church friends tried to “banish the evil” from Tania. That day, the young girl realized that monsters weren’t just found in horror tales. They could lurk anywhere—including in your own family and community—and look just like you. Dinner on Monster Island is Tania’s memoir of her life and childhood in Singapore—where she discovered how difference is often perceived as deviant, damaged, disobedient, and sometimes, demonic. As she pulls back the veil on life on the small island, she reveals that sometimes kind, sometimes monstrous side of all of us. Intertwined with her experiences is an analysis of the role of women in horror. Tania looks at films and popular culture such as Carrie, The Witch, and The Ring to illuminate the ways in which women are often portrayed as monsters, and how in real life, monsters are not what we think.

Moving and lyrical, written with earnest candor, and leavened with moments of humor and optimism, Dinner on Monster Island is a deeply personal examination of one woman's experience grappling with her identity and a fantastic analysis of monsters, monstrous women, and the worlds in which they live.

Moby Dyke: An Obsessive Quest to Track Down the Last Remaining Lesbian Bars in America by Krista Burton

A former Rookie contributor and creator of the popular blog Effing Dykes investigates the disappearance of America’s lesbian bars by visiting the last few in existence.

Lesbian bars have always been treasured safe spaces for their customers, providing not only a good time but a shelter from societal alienation and outright persecution. In 1987, there were 206 of them in America. Today, only a couple dozen remain. How and why did this happen? What has been lost—or possibly gained—by such a decline? What transpires when marginalized communities become more accepted and mainstream?

In Moby Dyke, Krista attempts to answer these questions firsthand, venturing on an epic cross-country pilgrimage to the last few remaining dyke bars. Her pilgrimage includes taking in her first drag show since the onset of the pandemic at The Back Door in Bloomington, Indiana; competing in dildo races at Houston’s Pearl Bar; and, despite her deep-seated hatred of karaoke, joining a group serenade at Nashville’s Lipstick Lounge and enjoying the dreaded pastime for the first time in her life.

While Burton sets out on the excursion to assess the current state of lesbian bars, she also winds up examining her own personal journey, from coming out to her Mormon parents to recently marrying her husband, a trans man whose presence on the trip underscores the important conversation about who precisely is welcome in certain queer spaces—and how they and their occupants continue to evolve.

Moby Dyke is an insightful and hilarious travelogue that celebrates the kind of community that can only be found in windowless rooms soundtracked by Britney Spears-heavy playlists and illuminated by overhead holiday lights no matter the time of year.

Gender Queer: A Memoir by Maia Kobabe

In 2014, Maia Kobabe, who uses e/em/eir pronouns, thought that a comic of reading statistics would be the last autobiographical comic e would ever write. And the time, it was the only thing e felt comfortable with strangers knowing about em. Now, Gender Queer is here. Maia’s intensely cathartic autobiography charts eir journey of self-identity, which includes the mortification and confusion of adolescent crushes, grappling with how to come out to family and society, bonding with friends over erotic gay fanfiction, and facing the trauma and fundamental violation of pap smears.

Started as a way to explain to eir family what it means to be nonbinary and asexual, Gender Queer is more than a personal story: it is a useful and touching guide on gender identity—what it means and how to think about it—for advocates, friends, and humans everywhere.

How Far the Light Reaches: A Life in Ten Sea Creatures by Sabrina Imbler

A queer, mixed race writer in a largely white, male field, science and conservation journalist Sabrina Imbler has always been drawn to the mystery of life in the sea, and particularly to creatures living in hostile or remote environments. Each essay in their debut collection profiles one such creature, including:

-the mother octopus who starves herself while watching over her eggs,

-the Chinese sturgeon whose migration route has been decimated by pollution and dams,

-the bizarre, predatory Bobbitt worm (named after Lorena),

-the common goldfish that flourishes in the wild,

-and more.

Imbler discovers that some of the most radical models of family, community, and care can be found in the sea, from gelatinous chains that are both individual organisms and colonies of clones to deep-sea crabs that have no need for the sun, nourished instead by the chemicals and heat throbbing from the core of the Earth. Exploring themes of adaption, survival, sexuality, and care, and weaving the wonders of marine biology with stories of their own family, relationships, and coming of age, How Far the Light Reaches is a shimmering, otherworldly debut that attunes us to new visions of our world and its miracles.

Gay Bar: Why We Went Out by Jeremy Atherton Lin

As gay bars continue to close at an alarming rate, a writer looks back to find out what’s being lost in this intimate, stylish, and indispensable celebration of queer history.

Strobing lights and dark rooms; throbbing house and drag queens on counters; first kisses, last call: the gay bar has long been a place of solidarity and sexual expression—whatever your scene, whoever you’re seeking. But in urban centers around the world, they are closing, a cultural demolition that has Jeremy Atherton Lin wondering: What was the gay bar? How have they shaped him? And could this spell the end of gay identity as we know it?

In Gay Bar, the author embarks upon a transatlantic tour of the hangouts that marked his life, with each club, pub, and dive revealing itself to be a palimpsest of queer history. In prose as exuberant as a hit of poppers and dazzling as a disco ball, he time-travels from Hollywood nights in the 1970s to a warren of cruising tunnels built beneath London in the 1770s; from chichi bars in the aftermath of AIDS to today’s fluid queer spaces; through glory holes, into Crisco-slicked dungeons and down San Fransisco alleys. He charts police raids and riots, posing and passing out—and a chance to encounter one restless night that would change his life forever. The journey that emerges is a stylish and nuanced inquiry into the connection between place and identity—a tale of liberation, but one that invites us to go beyond the simplified Stonewall mythology and enter lesser-known battlefields in the struggle to carve out a territory. Elegiac, randy, and sparkling with wry wit, Gay Bar is at once a serious critical inquiry, a love story and an epic night out to remember.

[carionto]

Enjoying the whole 'verse. As I make my way through, there was one thing I haven't seen, but maybe I missed or haven't gotten to yet. So if it's not there, and you're still taking some prompts via ask, what happened to the inevitable humans that decided to explore the universe outside of our bubble, when we were in that other dimension area?

True nothing.

Despite the planetside chaos, though for some - precisely because of it, there were a number of efforts to go beyond what we brought along with us to the dimension between when we "vanished".

Every single time it was disappointment, if they returned that is.

The sky was barren, yet sunshine made the days bright, and the tides still came as they always had.

The Sun is there. The Moon is there. Everything is still as it was. We just... can't see it, can't interact with it.

Understandably, many could not accept such a lack of logic and set out for space once more, once it became possible to escape the debris field that is.

Some went to the Moon, but could never find an orbit. Their craft was not pulled by anything other than the Earth. One even tried going to the center of the Sun. Same result.

Yet the fact the seasons still changed meant we were going around the Sun as normal. Heck, even Lunar eclipses still happened when they should. This maddening reality meant that every few decades before we finally reacquired the knowledge and technical ability to "reappear" saw one or two individuals who refused to believe that where we were, between dimensions, contained just the Earth and everything on it and nothing else forever in every direction.

That didn't matter to them. In fact, that's what drove them to try to prove that false. They never came back to "reappear" with the rest of Humanity. And they never will. Not after what everyone experienced after we did.

We didn't mean to leave anyone behind, we were planning on sending back a beacon, hoping they get the message and eventually return. But not now. Whatever -it- is thinking, if it is intelligent at all, we can't risk anything.

Those few dozen souls have been abandoned. Maybe some will never know it, forever continuing their unfulfillable quest, while others will drift to where their computer will say the Earth is and not find it, forever lost to despair until the end of their lives.

Or perhaps some will figure out their own way of "reappearing" one day. One such mission was a fully staffed research cruiser with a combined total of ninety PhDs in relevant fields (and about 200 in fake majors, but alas). So it is not out of the question a group of desperate but determined and disillusioned deviants could surprise us.

Or maybe they will be "reappeared" by someone or something else. Recent revelations that there may be more to reality than we knew leave infinite possibilities on the table now.

(thanks for the prompt, I also thought I had addressed this somewhere and forgot)