Where I’m at in supernatural (I’m on like literally ep 6 help) I haven’t met Castiel yet, but based on tumblr and memes I’m assuming this is their relationship
dean: *talking abt his childhood* but yk shit happens
Castiel: *eye twitching*
dean: what
Castiel: that’s not normal
dean: and? I’m fine aren’t i
Castiel: *gay “no babe ur not” frustration*
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thinking about Dean Winchester running his hand through your hair for the first time, like properly, maybe brushing it for the first time and feeling the softness. this man has never had time for expensive shampoo constantly on fight or flight so just grabs whatever shampoo, certainly never lets it sits in his hair long enough to absorb the pretty smell. his hand falters and he remembers his mum's soft blonde hair. after that you notice your shampoo drains quicker than normal and his hair gets softer and smells pretty. you'll never tell him you know.
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everyone's like "sam's the emotionally avaliable brother!" as if he doesn't spend the entire 1st season having nightmares over jess's death and refusing to talk to dean about it
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Another rant because Pinterest cut me off at 500 characters.🙄
Can we just take a moment to enjoy our family's humor first? I love us. Now to what I wanted to post. Lol
I honestly feel this is because, at the end of the day, Dean needs to feel taken care of- protected. He's always had to protect and care for everyone around him and he wants someone to do the same. Be with someone he can relax not have to be in control and calculate every moment and it weighs him down.
Sam on the other hand was very well loved and protected even if it was by a few he felt that love unlike Dean who saw himself unloveable Sam felt love and cared for at one point or another. The one thing he never got was control over anything. He's always struggled with things being out of his hands, unable to stop and control his desires. From wanting to have a father, a normal life, go to college to saving a kid, having his Mom, and finding someone other than his brother to stay and stay alive. Dean was raised as a soldier he accepted it even if he didn't like it. Sam was different he wanted to save people and he couldn't just say he did what he could.
Sam needs to feel in control- like he has something that's in his hands and only his. He needs to know even if everything in his life is spiraling he has this one thing where it's all his. How he wants it, when he wants it, how it goes and plays out. Obviously consensually. He finally has this one thing that's his and he doesn't have to worry because it's in his control.
Dean needs to know when everything goes to hell he can take the weight off his shoulders someone can carry it for him when he can't. Sub.
Sam needs to know when everything has gone to hell he still can change it he needs to know it's in his control and he can damn well do it. Dom.
Both reflect their Mommy and Daddy issues funnily.
John stripped (Wrong word I know sorry lol) Sam of every ounce of control holding himself and Dean over him every chance he got it was what Sammy wanted or his family. While Sam always felt the guilt of Mary's death and blamed himself slightly because he couldn't do anything it was out of his control.
While on the other hand with Dean, John stipped (again I know I'm sorry lol) Dean of his security made him a Mom and a Dad not just to Sam but to John himself. Dean never let the weight off his shoulder of what could happen if he wasn't there unlike Sam it wasn't taken in an "I don't have control I can't do anything about anything no matter what I do, and it will be all my fault" way but in an "If I'm not there and I'm not strong enough everything will go wrong and it will be all my fault," way. If he wasn't strong and kept moving he'd lose everyone he had. He had to hold the weight off of his family or they'd drown.
When Dean was younger and Mary was still around he was seen comforting her and being her shoulder to lean on before he was 4 about a fight she and John had. He was everyone's shoulder since birth and he needs to know he has someone else to lean on every once in a while for them to hold the weight off of him so he can do it for everyone else in a few hours.
I love our boys and trust me they're a good mix of both Dom and Sub in the sheets but I feel this is why it has been way more common for us to see Sam on the show all rough and Dean gentle. Even when on top they're both bottoms let's be honest.
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Yk what I do when I'm feeling low? This:
Does it make me feel better? No, it makes me wanna rip my skin off. Will I ever stop? No.
I blame Jensen Ackles for all my suffering and move on. Cheers.
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