#Davy perez what do you know.

[deanmarywinchester]

Advanced Thanatology and Tombstone double header tn. many thoughts as always but one of them is Of course you are a mortician who dresses like a 40s pinup and you were at the amanda palmer concert. and are applying to special effects makeup school

[mybrainproblems]

brain is just mii waiting room music as i consider where i've ended up in my supernatural fandom journey

[eljeebee]

Trigger Warning: Mentions of Homophobia

Vanderburg Twin seen Cheating from His Commoner Boyfriend

These are the words sitting in front of Dowager Duchess Margaux.

On her screen, a picture of her son, chatting with a woman on a pub probably around Foxbury. They were quite close in the photograph. She thinks they were about to hug, or had just hugged, but she could see the body language–none of them had tense shoulders, and none of them wore an awkward smile.

She rubbed her temple. What gave her a pounding headache was the tabloid’s assumptions of her son dating a commoner boyfriend–Louie Davis, the twins’ friend.

Every showbiz news network, news site–whatever–speculated that he and Louie were dating, as the paparazzi had taken quite a few pictures of them together when their friend group were out, when they were still at high school. Her private secretaries spent a lot of time giving the networks kill orders to kill every picture of the children, especially the photographs of Louie and Seamus “together”, on a reason stating that they were minors, and scared the networks that they could be sued by the parents for taking their photos without their consent. They made sure they never mentioned Mousse’s relationship status.

She even sent a peace offering to Louie’s parents, some new set of high-quality pots and pans for the father, a new handbag for the mother, and a new dress for Sidera Harper–Louie’s girlfriend.

Louie has a girlfriend, for Watcher’s sake.

Bernie entered the room, slamming the door. She could see him stressed. Obviously.

“This is why I told him to release a statement!” He almost growled. “The family never batted an eye when they said he’s gay. But I know the Queen Mother was disappointed.”

“Didn’t stop her from showing her favoritism to the twins, though,” Penny pointed out.

“Yes, Penny,” Bernie exasperatedly sighed. “But the disappointment is there. Did you see how she’s preferring Julie more than her brother?”

“Or maybe,” Penny rolled her eyes, “Julie is the Duchess so she’s more focused on her?”

Bernie exhaled. His heated glare targeted the ceiling, “Look,” he looked back at her, “the family is giving me shit right now–excuse me, Your Grace–they don’t like the cheating allegations. They can leave the boy be and be gay than see him as a cheater. He is considered his father’s spitting image, and they would hate it if he’s painted as an adulterer!”

Penny scoffed, “What, you’d rather have the family be homophobic than give you shit about a cheating scandal?” “What? No!” Bernie let out a noise of frustration. “Look at Prince Gerard and Mr. Simon, since when did the family release their disappointment?”

“Obviously not publicly. Prince Gerard and his husband stepping down from royal duties, retiring from his senior royal work, and moving to Starlight Shores is very telling. And don’t reason with me with Milo and Ramon Perez. The family doesn’t mind them– don’t care even –they’re distant relatives of the household. They’re far away from the throne, Bernie. As long as it’s not the main family, not from the line of King Pierce, they’re fine with it, because it doesn’t steal the show, doesn’t steal the limelight, doesn’t tamper royal values.”

Penny pointed a finger to Bernie. If he was near, Margaux knew the younger secretary would shove him with it, “That’s how homophobic they are.”

“Enough, you two!” Margaux raised her voice. “Let’s not put the blame on my son here.”

“That’s not what I – ”

She held her hand as she stood up from her seat. Bernie closed his mouth.

“What we’re going to do is fix this. You will drive to Foxbury, get my twins, their friends, including this girl, and we will debrief them. From there, we will ask Mousse to release a statement, which includes clarification on why he never spoke before–force him if need be, and then we will have Julie release a statement that shows support,” she motioned to Penny, “which includes a picture of their friend group, with Louie and Sidera together– take note of this –and my son and this girl sitting beside each other. Stage them to be as intimate as possible, have him sling an arm around her waist–anything. That will shut them up.”

“Excellent idea, my lady.”

“And if this doesn’t work?”

“Then we face the wrath of the Queen Mother.”

Seamus spared a quick glance to Bea, who stood beside him, helping him with his presentation.

Lou? He recalled the conversation he and Louie had. How did you know you…liked…Sid?

Louie had whipped his head to face him so fast Seamus had almost laughed. Dude…

He had sighed. I don’t know Louie. I thought of Bea as a friend, but I’m starting to see something more. I can no longer see her as a friend. Every night I think about her, her voice, her laughs, the way she speaks. The way she smartly answers our professors, the way she handles her fans inside the campus, telling them to move their asses away and not disturb her education…I always look forward to seeing her, Lou, but I’m also nervous when I’m about to see her. I was never the one to look conscious about my appearance because everyone finds me handsome anyway –

– Woooow. You sounded like a prick there. Louie had laughed at him.

Seamus had chuckled at this, and then continued, When I’m with her, I always find myself worrying about how I look. Do I look good? I’ve asked the girls about it. Julie always says yes, and Sid just gave me a thumbs up. My confidence spikes–until I see her.

Yeah, and you buy the magazine that has her at the cover, Louie had teased him by adding another thing that he’s so embarrassed to admit.

Seamus remembered giving him a look. He also remembered Louie stuck his tongue out to tease him more.

Anyway, his friend had patted him on the back firmly. You’ve fallen in love, my boy.

And back to the present. This is why she’s here. He invited her under the pretense of asking her help. Honestly, he can breeze through this presentation with how inspired he is.

He’s going to confess to Bea. Right here. Right now.

“Bea– ”

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!

He tried not to click his tongue. Smiling at Bea, he said, “I’ll get it.”

As soon as he opened the door, in came Louie, pushing Seamus back into his room, and kicking the door closed. He looks worried.

“Nobody freak out,” Louie said, but it looked like he said that for himself.

Worry etched on Bea’s face. “What’s going on?”

“Girl, I said, don’t freak out!” Louie let out a sound that made Seamus almost laugh.

“No one’s freaking out but you, Lou. What’s up?” Seamus chuckled.

“There’s…” Louie gulped. “There’s paparazzi outside our door!”

They jogged down the stairs, and when the paparazzi noticed them through the glass windows of their door, they pounded, demanding them to step outside. It was locked, luckily, and Seamus is sure they wouldn’t break the window–no one really liked to pay property damage.

“Juls,” Louie said to his phone, “lock your front door. Do not go out. Your brother and I will handle this.”

Seamus heard him. What his sister said, he doesn’t know, as Louie had immediately dropped the call.

“What should we do?” his friend asked. “Should we call Mr. Braxton?”

Seamus thought for a moment. He’d hate to have Bernie here. He’s going to give him one hell of a lecture. You should’ve released a statement a long time ago!

“I’ll go out and talk,” he finally said. “Just a quick announcement…”

“I’ll go with you,” Louie firmly nodded.

“Then I’ll go as well,” Bea added.

“Are you sure?” Louie asked, worried. “I think it’s safe for you to stay inside.”

Bea looked at Seamus. He sighed and gave her a small smile. “Okay, but if it gets too much, Louie will bring you inside, alright?”

“Lord Seamus! Is it true you’re cheating with your boyfriend?”

“Mr. Davis, how do you feel that he’s cheating with that girl right beside you?”

“Seriously? I have a girlfriend!” Louie scowled.

Seamus whispered back to him, “That’s the first and last reaction you’ll give them. Let me handle this.”

Louie shared a glance with Bea. She nodded at him, before looking down at her feet to avoid the paparazzi. Louie rubbed the back of his neck.

Seamus saw his sister and Sid watching through the windows of their door. He knows what she’s thinking. Don’t. He looked away.

“I’m here to confirm one thing,” Seamus started, and the commotion stopped. The journalists waited. He continued, “Bea and I…” he glanced at her. I’ll have to confess this way. I’m sorry.

“We’re dating. The cheating allegations are not true–never is, never was. No relationship before Bea. My sister and I are dear friends of Louie, and his girlfriend, Ms. Harper. I have been silent to the media for many years, even when you assumed my orientation, as I believed that leaving you be is enough, and not engaging with your behavior will keep my family safe. As I’m seeing right now, it’s not. You’re putting my friends at risk. Now, I suggest you leave, before we call the campus security.”

As soon as he finished speaking, the journalists started speaking over each other. A cacophony of more questions. Seamus turned on his heel, pulling Bea with him, and on cue, Louie followed suit, shielding them as they went back inside. He elbowed some journalists away, then quickly closed the door behind him, locking it.

“I’ll call Bernie,” Seamus said, exhaling. “Call security, please.”

Louie nodded.

Seamus looked at Bea. He doesn’t know what to make of her expression. He understood why she was angry. She should be. He should’ve confessed to her first before publicizing that they’re dating.

“We’ll talk after this,” Bea finally said.

There goes my confession.

I've asked some friends to beta read the first part of the update, namely Margaux and her conversation with her private secretaries, so I'd like to thank: @systsim, @novac2281, @plasmadaze, @authorspirit, and @changingplumbob. Thank you for your feedback 🩷

[ananke-xiii]

Maybe if you could feel

All the heartaches I conceal

What does Sam want?

This is a long meta about "Breakdown" s13e11. You've been warned.

Sam Winchester upon hearing that his heart is worth 500k. If you don't find room in your heart to love him now you probably never will.

As I’ve said before, I honestly don’t know how to answer this question. Or maybe I do. We'll see how this post ends. What I do know is that the writers are sure that the heart of the matter for Sam is to be or not to be a hunter.

SPN finale seems to tell us that Sam wants out but does he really? The show makes a big deal out of this hunter vs “normal” life but is this the right question? If I think about it, the hunters’ world is very diverse: Bobby had a house and a yard and he had a very specific way of doing his “business”; Ellen run a bar; Jody and Donna live “normal” lives and have an actual job; those hunters from “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox” formed a sort of community; Wally from “Stuck in the Middle (With You)" seemed to be a pretty well-adjusted guy; Garth studied to become a dentist and lived his life as a hunter on his own terms. Sure, most of these people have ended up dead or turned monsters so I’m not saying that the hunters’ life is an easy and cushy life. No, it’s high-risk and extremely dangerous (like a lot of “normal” jobs but let’s not go there).

What I am trying to say is that Sam and Dean are more of an exception than the rule. There are, factually, different ways to be hunters that Sam and Dean don’t even consider. Ah, yes. You will say now “yeah, duh, because nobody is as codependent (ugh) as them, that’s what the show is about etc”. Weeeeeeeeeell, the thing is that I don’t think so. I think that their “problem” is being unable to break free from the "John Winchester’s Way of Seeing the World". For John hunting was his new "home" and it was made of motel rooms and diners and bars and so it must be for Sam and Dean. Except, it must not. Even the bunker indirectly comes from him. Because they’re legacy. I mean, by the end of the show I don’t know if Sam considered the bunker his “home” or not but what I’m trying to say is that they took what they were given and never really questioned it. Or, maybe, what I'm really trying to say is that there are infinite ways to build a "home".

In s11 Sam must have been thinking about other ways because we know he was thinking about “settling down” with someone who knew the life. That was good, that was growth. That was imagination. But then Mary happened and then Jack happened and now, all of a sudden, it’s not the two of them anymore: whether they like it or not, they’re building a bigger family, they're creating a "home" together with new people in their lives (with great, oh god, greaaaat difficulty).

In “Breakdown” Wendy is family to Donna, therefore she is family to Sam and Dean too because, according to family’s transitivity, the family of my family is my family.

Growing up, gas stations and nomadic lifestyles.

What I like about Davy Perez’s writing style is that it’s very cinematographic. His ability in visual storytelling surely helps the episodes' directors because they are always shot very beautifully. Now I haven’t watched the movie so I don’t know if the vibes match but “Breakdown” is the title of a movie with Kurt Russel (somebody’s crush is showing hehe) and it’s, like, a thriller with truck drivers or something so he definitely took some inspiration from that movie, I guess. Of course, the title also refers to Sam’s depression. So let’s see what this is about.

Wendy is on a gap year trip (and she hasn’t been ho-) and her abandoned car has been found at the side of a road mainly used by long-haul truckers. She took some time-off before college to go on an adventure (s9 teaches us that usually women on adventures end bad in SPN but let’s move on). We don’t know her motivations but her name is Wendy so I must assume that Perez is telling us that she doesn’t want to grow up or maybe she’s not ready to go to college and wants some time, who knows? What’s important here is that the “Kids Who Don’t Want to Grow Up” theme is established. Since Sam will literally take Wendy’s seat in the torture chamber I must ask: is Sam a Wendy or a Peter Pan? In other words: will he leave Neverland/Hunting and go live a “normal” life or will he stay in “Neverland” and only occasionally visit the “normal” world? Will his children go to Neverland one day? We know Sam must be asking himself these questions because Dean has made them see “Lost Boys” 36 times. So, you know.

If the “Kids Who Don’t Want to Grow Up” theme was not clear Dean refers to Wendy as “Alice in Wonderland”. So this is NOT just about growing up, this is also about the loss of innocence. How does our Wendy lose her innocence? By entering “Mann(y)’ Truck Stop Café”. Oh gosh, this will be about SA. Oh my god, Sam, poor Sam (edit: and poor Wendy, the ep doesn't do her justice and neither did I by not mentioning her here).

What’s interesting about this episode is that we have seen these places countless times in the series: diners, café, bars, gas stations etc. They’re familiar to us. And yet, it suffices that a young girl enters one of these spaces during the evening that all of a sudden we realize how unsettling they can be. Wendy enters the café and it’s full of scary creeps: the cashier, the man sitting at the table, the truck-driver at the counter, the dude at the gas pump. To be honest I can’t possibly recall all of SPN episodes but it’s worth noticing that this shift in perception mainly happens when the protagonist of the episode is a woman. In “Ladies Drink Free” we are told that Claire can “deal” with creepy dudes and in “Alex Annie Alexis Ann” Alex is literally used as bait in bars. The first thing Sam asks Donna when they meet and she tells them about Wendy is “What was she doing out here?”.  What I gather from this question and from what the show is telling me is that “out here” is not a place for young girls and boys. In fact, Luis Fernando is met with the same fate as Wendy. Nosy cashier tells girls to “smile more”. Slimy Pastor Hankey is a fucking predator who flashes girls and kidnaps boys. The truckers on the radio make lewd comments at Dean’s request about Wendy. “Out here” is total shit, men are total shit.

And yet. And yet.

This is Sam and Dean’s world. This is where they grew up: between a motel and a bar. This is “John Winchester’s Way of Seeing the World”. Or was he really seeing? Was he paying attention? Evidently not, otherwise he wouldn’t have left his children leave in such danger. All of a sudden monsters don’t seem so bad. Or.

Or are we obsessing a little bit too much over normalcy and monstrosity? Are we losing our focus?

You see, and don’t quote me on that, but I think “Breakdown” is, again perhaps, the only episode where the show examines how they’re portraying a specific lifestyle, the “out here” lifestyle, the John Winchester’s lifestyle. Let me explain.

Post- November 2nd, John’s way of life is nomadic. He changes towns like he changes his clothes, he moves a lot, he’s always in a car, driving. As I’ve established, this doesn’t have to be a hunter’s life, but it’s John’s. He's found his meaning in it. And it’s Sam’s and Dean’s too. The opposite of a white-picket fence lifestyle is not a hunter’s life but it’s a nomadic one.

Now what is this episode telling us about various nomads? Well, to be honest, very bad things.

The serial killer, The Butterfly, is called this way because of his migration pattern: he seems to move from north to south and vice-versa. Like butterflies (by the way, you know Sam is depressed because a. he would’ve totally known Agent Clegg was full of crap, Sam Winchester knows his serial killers and b. Clegg’s pattern description wasn’t solid. I can’t really tell why but years of listening to true crime podcasts tell me so. The Sam I know and love would’ve called bull on the spot).

Wendy was on her gap year, travelling the country and look where she is now.

People who travel alone are targets.

People who won’t be missed are targets.

All the truckers in this episode are creepy.

The itinerant pastor is a sexual predator.

People who move as a lifestyle or because of their job are not portrayed very well in this episode, are they? They live liminal spaces and liminal spaces are always perceived as monstrous.

But then, a light: Liz. Liz is the truck driver that didn’t stop when Wendy waved for help from the side of the road. She didn’t do it because she was behind schedule. Boom.

All of a sudden we are reminded that these are real people with real jobs, they’re not the actual monsters we’re so quick to compare them with. But also, yeah, some of them act preeeeeeeetty bad.

Guess who is the actual monster? Your regular neighbor. The cashier at the café. And guess who ALSO acts bad: The FBI agent. Sometimes even good people can act badly if they’re desperate or if they have the power to do so. Or if it’s both. Donna, for instance, is a police officer who threatens the slimy pastor by telling him that he will get SAed in the cell. Or people don't help other people because they're on a schedule and if they don't make it on time they might get fired. In other words, the world cannot be contained and divided into perfect categories.

“Out here” there’s violence wherever you are on the spectrum between monsters who must be killed and people who must be saved (the show’s favorite false dichotomy).

So I ask: why, again, is the “white-picket fence” lifestyle treated as a standard for normalcy in this show? Why do nomadic lifestyles feel so threatening? What are they threatening exactly? “John Winchester’s Way of Seeing the World” wasn’t bad per se because he made Sam and Dean move a lot. It was bad because he neglected them, he kept them isolated. Because he treated them as adults and they were not.

The hunter's lifestyle is not about the monsters either. You can hunt monsters and have a house and a mortgage and do your job like Donna. But this doesn’t mean necessarily that you’re in the life. As a matter of fact, everybody is in the life. The only ones who are not in the life are the ones who don't know about the life. When they know about the life, they can pretend they’re not in the life but they are. Doug, for example, decides to pretend he hasn’t seen the truth. I don’t judge him for that, he saw a young man getting his arms severed on a webcam and he was turned into a vampire (another parallel to “Ladies Drink Free”). I can understand why he wants to pretend and go back to his old life. Truth is he never will. He will forever know that monsters are real and that knowing it doesn’t change anything: your neighbor can be a vampire and your colleague can be a serial killer.

The line between what’s the meaning of being human vs being a monster has never been thinner than in this episode. The atmosphere is rather bleak. The episode is not a positive one and it ends on a very negative note.

Wicked hearts, everybody needs food, the dark place.

'If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear me.'

Perez couldn’t find a better Psalm than this for Sam. It contains Sam in a nutshell. This is a psalm about sin and about prayers which are rather fitting themes for Sam. The Lord won’t hear your prayers if you don’t repent and move away from your sins. One has to be righteous, pure of heart and clean in order to be listened by the Lord. Sam struggles a lot against the concepts of purity and cleanliness. He is, after all, “unclean in the biblical sense”. One of the ways it can be interpreted is that Sam, by drinking demon blood, has violated the biblical law against blood consumption which has made him an abomination and has set him apart from humankind because blood is associated with life and therefore with God. Drinking blood is a sin that has contaminated him and he is, now, contaminated food in return. The "you are what you eat" hypothesis.

But blood represents family, too. A family that, no matter what, Sam seems to be unable to keep. And it’s not just family: everyone they know ends up bad (“I mean, when has knowing us ever worked out for anyone?”). Sam prays but nobody listens because (he thinks) his heart is wicked, dirty, impure. He feels unconnected, detached, separated. In a word, lonely.

While Donna is depressed because of her niece’s disappearance, Sam is facing the fact that Jack’s gone and, with him, his last hope to find his mother. He doesn’t want to help with Donna’s case because he doesn’t want to see. He wants to keep pretending but the wall is already crumbling: he’s not hungry, he doesn’t sleep, he stays in bed, he doesn’t want to “work”. He’s paralleled with Donna because of the huge loss and emptiness inside of his heart but he’s way more similar to Doug. Maybe Donna can live "the life" because she’s a hero but him? He just wants to go home. Neverland is not for him (“I… No. Maybe you all can live this life, but I can’t. I just wanna go home”). The things are two: 1. Doug, darling, there is no life you can get back to. You can pretend but that doesn't make it not-real anymore. 2. There is no “home” for Sam. And I’m not talking about a literal place to go back to, I’m talking about a feeling of “being home”. The dark place is, according to Sam, their lives. A life he has tried to pretend that it didn’t have to be this dark, he has tried to pretend that they could have a “home” but, no matter what, they can’t (although, Sam, heart, you really need to know that Dean actually can have a home and, in fact, has already been building one for years. The good news is that you totally can too, everybody can).

Sam’s heart is so devoid of warmth and nice feelings that’s not the place where the soul lives anymore, it’s just a piece of meat that can be sold on the dark web. How much is Sam Winchester’s heart worth? 500k US dollars. There’s a PRICE for his heart and its price is very high because “Folks, there are many pieces to Sam Winchester… but only one heart”.

I find this scene absolutely brilliant because it’s a very warped form of psychostasia, or the weighing of the soul. First of all, Sam’s not dead but he’s already being judged. Secondly, his heart, the seat of the “ka” (life) has not been weighed on a scale against a feather but it’s been put on auction to the best bidder: in this scenario it doesn’t matter if his heart is pure or wicked, what matters is who wants to pay more for it. In Sam’s world you’re either the food or the eater and Sam’s heart is the main course in this episode. This fits nicely with the myth of ancient Egypt where the soul would get eaten by a deity if the heart is heavier than a feather. I like how Egyptian myths keep popping up this season and how they’re super fitting. In this case, for example, the weighing of the heart is also closely associated with St. Michael who holds a sword and a scale. It’s cool, right? I mean, it’s totally not cool for my poor Sam, but it’s cool how symbols keep symbolling (lol) once you start poking them.

So Sam. Sam’s being sold as food. He’s food just like the people who won’t be missed are food, according to Clegg. Sam’s complicated relationship with food now takes a new, darker turn. When Sam, Dean, Doug and Donna watch poor Luis Fernando getting chopped by Clegg, Sam winces and stops the video. The cashier/vampire laughs at him and mockingly asks him if he’s vegan. I don't think he's vegan but he sure is red meat this episode.

Another thing that I like about this episode is Clegg’s little monologue:

Sam: Why are you doing this? Clegg: Well, ‘cause somebody has to. How many monsters do you think are out there, Sam? You know, if you – you had to guess. Sam: Hundreds. Thousands. Clegg: Add a zero. Actually, add two. See, those freaks that you and your brother chase, those are just the ones that can’t pass. Either because they’re too mean or they’re too stupid, or both. But most monsters… hell, they could be your next-door neighbor. They work a regular job, mow the lawns on a Saturday. And they need to eat, which is where I come in. Sam: So you sell them people. Clegg: I sell them people other people won’t miss. And because I do that, I save lives. If my customers didn’t have me… then all those hungry, hungry hippos would be out there huntin’ and killin’. And you couldn’t stop ‘em. No one could. You should be thanking me.

If we can set aside Clegg’s sadism and capitalistic acumen for a moment we would see that the man does have a point. Let me explain.

It’s worth noticing that Clegg’s pulse on the monsters' world is paradoxically more realistic than Sam’s: there are thousands upon thousands of monsters. As a matter of fact, Sam and Dean only catch the ones that “can’t pass” (another whole essay could be written on this sentence alone), but here, in the real world, a monster can be anybody. And all these monsters need to eat, just like people.

First of all, hold on because this is mind-blowing: what Clegg is telling us is that Dean and Sam’s reality is not the totality of reality, it’s just what THEY experience. In truth, things are waaaaay much different. Once again in the episode I notice a subtle criticism at the brothers myopic, limited view of the world. They’re wasting their hearts away and for what? For nothing. The battle against monsters is a losing battle. The "out of the life" dream is just a dream when you know that monsters buy human meat on the market and it's, like, a totally normal thing that all monsters living "normal" lives know about. Meanwhile Crazy Clegg "out here" is "saving people" because he feeds people to monsters! The paradox is so incredible it’s almost ridiculous. But he’s got a bit of an ego here because the ones whom we should really “thank” are… the people who won’t be missed (sorry for being me for a minute but these are the poor animals of the world that humans horribly torture and happily buy to eat).

Do you understand that this whole Clegg economy is based on the murder of people on the fringe, people who inhabit liminality? People who are lonely? People who have no ties? People without family? And instead of metaphorically feed these people with care and love, they become prey and food so that the world can continue on its pretense that everything is fucking normal. It’s not just Sam who was pretending, it’s not Doug who has just now started pretending. Everything is a big pretense. The truth? Life is a dark place.

Dean: Hey, look, I know you’re in some sort of a— Sam: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, don’t – don’t… You keep saying I’m in a dark place, but I’m not, Dean. Everything I’m saying is the truth. It’s our lives. And I tried to pretend it didn’t have to be. I tried to pretend we could have Mom back and Cas and – and help Jack. But we can’t. This ends one way for us, Dean. It ends bloody. It ends bad.

This is the moment where I should say some inspirational stuff but no, as far as Sam Winchester is concerned, that is the truth. He has started off the season with what we now understand was fake optimism, he failed, okay, but he did try in his own way to support Dean in his grief while he was dealing with his own shit. He saw his brother die and then had to carry the faith for him too (all the while having nobody with whom he could talk about what he was going through). But he carried the weight and things got better cause Cas got back and Dean resurrected with him and then they lost Jack and now Sam has lost his hope to ever see his mother again (his mother who’s in an alternate world with his abuser, the angel that broke.him.down).

What’s more, by the end of the season Sam will indeed end bloody and his personal abuser will stick with him only to make sure to resurrect him and to remind him that their wicked more profound bond will be forever. A banner year for Sam.

So what does Sam want? What everyone wants. Love, people. It’s always about love. And some rest, everybody needs rest to love and be loved.

PS: I cannot know for sure but I know it in my heart that “Under Pressure” was some sort of inspiration for this episode. Its lyrics are literally this episode. And this is how the song ends (I don’t want to end on a sad note):

Can't we give ourselves one more chance?

Why can't we give love that one more chance?

Why can't we give love, give love, give love, give love

Give love, give love, give love, give love?

'Cause love's such an old-fashioned word

And love dares you to care for

The people on the edge of the night

And love dares you to change our way of

Caring about ourselves

This is our last dance

This is our last dance

This is ourselves

Under pressure

Under pressure

Pressure.

[ladyluscinia]

There is a Reservoir Dogs episode???? Plz elaborate.

Season 12, Episode 12: Stuck in the Middle (With You) is a pretty straightforward homage to Reservoir Dogs, and also just Tarantino films in general. I'll admit I'm not a huge Tarantino buff myself so I might have missed anything subtler, but the references aren't much of a deep cut. A quote, some cinematic scene echoes - diner scene, badass group walk scene, Mr. Orange gut wound plot - and the whole thing gets framed as Mary telling Ketch a story through timestamped flashbacks.

For the most part it seems like a homage episode where they are having fun with it? Honor the iconic filmmaker and get your audience to go "heyyyyy" about how that's just like this iconic scene, but not doing anything particularly juicy with it.

Except.

Well.

Ok, so the episode was written by Davy Perez (of Tombstone fame) and directed by Richard Speight Jr. (of Destiel confession scene infamy). And at the very least Speight needs to defend himself before the court for this one, because at minimum directorial crimes were committed. That bit I mentioned above about the Mr. Orange gut wound plot? Well here's the thing:

I'm assuming you know this, but the whole Mr. Orange bleeding out from a gut wound while Mr. White homoerotically cradles him is kind of a big deal. Even crucial to the reference, you might say. Like the whole "you can be as intimate and emotional as you want with your warrior's-bond good buddy as long as he's tragically dying on the battlefield" is the whole fucking point. And yet... when they make the central plot of the whole episode stabbing good buddy Cas in the gut with a slow, painful, angel-killing spear they run into a snag.

Because this is Supernatural, and Cas is not going to die at the end of the episode to wipe the slate clean of gay vibes, and also doing things like homoerotic references with Cas in S12 just draws attention to how much homoerotic shit is already there. So they cast Dean as Mr. White and then absolutely break the parallel and upend the reference in order to no-homo the homoerotic gut wound arc.

Dean barely touches him. His emotions are subdued. They put Mary in the backseat to cradle him while Dean drives. And then right as he's actively "dying" Cas looks at Dean and the camera closeups on Dean and we get an "I love you" - pointed beat, remember there are more people in the room - "I love all of you". And instead of cradling him or even just sitting next to him Dean is standing across the room with minimal reaction.

They no-homo'd this so hard that it's almost impossible not to see Destiel in the negative space. Like by choosing to make a Reservoir Dogs reference and then immediately backing away from the reference in a panic, they a) look like cowards, and b) raise the question of why Cas and Dean can't do Mr. Orange and Mr. White. Go on, viewer. Imagine what that would look like if Dean cradled Cas and held his bleeding guts in and wiped the sweat off his face while panic muttering "You're gonna be fine".

Oh.

(That's fucking right.)

[mlobsters]

supernatural s14e4 mint condition (w. davy perez)

apparently we need a complete rundown of how ghosts work in this show in the recap, in case we've forgotten!

think my best chance at an episode that doesn't drive me up a wall is a monster of the week. let's go, davy

DEAN Oh, wow. SAM What? [DEAN touches his own cheek.] SAM Oh. Yes, I shaved. DEAN I mean, it’s so smooth. It’s like a dolphin’s belly. SAM Yeah, yeah.

ah yes, 5 o'clock shadow stubble, so smooth :p *scritch scritch*

SAM Hey uh, I wanted to check up on you. You doing okay? I mean you haven’t really come out of your room in almost a week. DEAN Well, since when is okay part of this job, huh? Yeah, Cas is you know, showing Jack the ropes and Dark Kaia and her spear are in the wind and we have no clue where Michael is or what he’s up to. And not that I’m complaining, but the house is full of strangers, so.

i would 1000% be complaining. i need my space and routines and ... not other people :p see: heebie jeebies

DEAN Thundercats? Seriously? SAM Yeah. But I mean, you’ve got your pizza, at least eight more of these movies so I’ll just leave you to it and I’ll get one of the other guys… DEAN (getting up off the bed) Oh, hell no, hell no. No, Panthro, that’s mine.

very cute, i will take it, please and thank you. sam finding a case that would actually help dean work out some of the post-michael funk, as opposed to whatever that previous mess of an episode was :p sam knows how to take care of dean too

DEAN Still not a fan of Halloween, huh?

dean's smiling already (at sam's expense, but hey he's basically offering)

DEAN Soft, delicate features, luxurious hair. She’s like your wonder twin.

listen, if anyone has soft delicate features; it's you, dean-o

so one notable thing for me personally is like. they're doing the thing were dean is super excited about something (like wrestling, cowboys, etc) but i'm not feeling the secondhand embarrassment? like it's not so over the top childish? it's just more standard fannish excitement? which is surprising and nice. we'll see if it holds :p (the pocket protector and dean's glasses below though push it pretty hard into costume)

SAM MIRL – Meet in real life. DEAN Why do you know what that means?

they're just dropping all sorts of little silly slice of life tidbits here. though i admit to having a hard time seeing our sam chatting people up online

DEAN So seriously, what is your deal with Halloween? SAM I don’t like it. DEAN Yeah, but why don’t you like it, hm? And don’t give me that like, ‘well every day is Halloween for us’ crap, okay? Because one: it ain’t, we don’t eat that much candy, two: you’ve had this hate on for years. So?

dean asking the good questions

smooth

geeking out over their favorite horror movies together, this is nice. little bonding over using it for escapism

DIRK and DEAN “… mechanic David Yaeger comes back every year on the day after Halloween. On All Saints Day Hatchet Man takes his revenge.” DIRK You really know your ASD. DEAN Ah well, growing up it was a… it was always nice to check out once in a while. I like to watch movies where I know the bad guy is going to lose.

predictable endings and the effect is multiplied when you've already seen it. no surprises, does something for the brain

little 80s horror / stranger things vibe with the music (man that title sequence for stranger things is so good). christopher lennertz and tim wynn on the music this episode

it's cute how they're intercutting their fake horror movie, security guards watching said movie and the stuff happening in the hospital mirroring the events. worked well

SAMANTHA Where did you learn how to do this? SAM I had a messed up childhood.

heard.

okay so i had to give them credit for how they were doing the cuts with the fake movie, and then they had to do too much showing the fake trailer for the fake movie for no reason :p if they wanted to show the slasher guy's backstory, they shoulda worked it in the other handful of times they showed us clips from the fake movie

DEAN Thanks man. You uh, you got me out here because you needed to get me out of my funk and give me a win and you did. So, thanks. SAM I’ve got to admit it didn’t go exactly like I thought it would. DEAN Hey man, I just went toe-to-toe with David freaking Yaeger. That was awesome! SAM Yeah, it wasn’t really… DEAN Don’t ruin this for me. SAM Hey Dean, when we get back to the bunker, man you’ve got to stop hiding out in your room. DEAN I’m not hiding out. SAM And I get why you’re doing it, I do but what happened with Michael… You said yes for me, for Jack, for your family. You did the right thing. What happened after, just because Michael was wearing your face doesn’t mean any of this is on you. I don’t blame you, no one blames you. You’ve got to try and stop blaming yourself. Please. DEAN I’m never going to get over it, okay? I’m just not. But you’re right; I’m not doing anybody any good by just staying cooped up in my room so, whatever you need. I’m there. Alright Chief.

think you probably will, dean. but anyway, good job, sammy!

DEAN Okay seriously, why? Why do you hate Halloween? What is it, was it the time I, I ate all your Halloween candy?

SAM No. DEAN Was it something that Dad did? SAM No dude, you don’t want to know. DEAN No I really do, really. What? SAM Alright, you remember Andrea Howell? DEAN …no? SAM When I was in sixth grade we were living in Bismarck and I had a huge crush on her. DEAN Aw, that’s adorable. Continue. SAM So, she invited me to her Halloween party. I said yes and I went over and at first everything was great, um, and then we started to play games. DEAN Spin the bottle. SAM Bobbing for apples. Like I said, I had a crush so the entire night my stomach was in knots and when it was my turn I bent down and… DEAN No. SAM …hurled, everywhere. Lunch, dinner it all came up, on Andrea mostly. People ran and screamed and it was so bad. DEAN Ah that’s great. SAM I ended up hiding out in the woods till you finally came and got me. DEAN So that’s why you hate Halloween.

aw, baby sam. there's something refreshing though of him having just regular kid traumatic experiences. finally it's not because of gross child neglect or being raised as a child soldier :p

DEAN Oh come on man you’ve got to deal with that, that’s I mean… Alright this is what we’re going to do, next year we’re doing Halloween right okay? I’m thinking matching outfits like uh, Batman and Robin. SAM No. DEAN Bert and Ernie. SAM No. DEAN That’s weird. SAM Yes. DEAN Uh, Rocky and Bullwinkle. SAM Dean… DEAN Shaggy and Scooby! SAM Why would we? DEAN Turner and Hooch. Ren and Stimpy. SAM Come on now. DEAN Thelma and Louise. SAM Thelma and…? DEAN We just put it in drive and go.

very silly and sweet. i vaguely recall dressing up as geena davis in middle school, but because of a league of their own :p would be a few years yet before i could watch thelma & louise

pleasantly surprised by that episode. monster of the week with fannish stuff that didn't go into making fun, didn't even bitch about the music! i will take it

[burningflamescurse]

“Beginnings”

Pre—Accident!Stephen Strange x Fem! Surgeon!OFC, Grey’s anatomy Crossover.

A/N: First of all I have a lot of Original Characters that I am adding to this Series, Which I will Explain the roles right now before moving along into the actual writing part!

Chief of General Surgery: Doctor Jack Wilson

General Surgery Attending: Doctor Liam Jones

General Surgery Resident: Doctor Lucas Miller

Chief of Thoracic Surgery: Doctor Charlotte Garcia.

Thoracic Surgery Attending: Henry Davis

Thoracic Surgery Resident: Camila Taylor

OBGYN/Neonatal Surgeon: Emily Perez

Fetal Surgeon: Evelyn Lopez

Pediatrician: Asher Lewis.

Neurosurgery Resident: Noah Sanchez.

Orthopedic Surgeon: Aria Adams

Hand Surgeon: Layla Rivera

Spine Surgeon: Ethan Carter

Trauma Surgeon: Hazel Evans

Pediatric Surgeon: Aurora Baker

Interns: Amy Nelson, David Torres, James Scott, Shelby Edwards, Willow Brooks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Two: Beginnings Of Tragic Incidents.

Chapter Summary: after Blake talked with Cristina about what’s been going on in Seattle with Meredith and Everyone else, her Interns do something unforgivable, something she can’t even Fathom forcing her to do something, maybe even tell her boyfriend.

CW//TW: Medial Terminology, Drama, Shouting, Surgery, Trauma, Cursing, Stephen getting mad at the interns, a Bunch of different OC’s, Blake and Christine are best friend, mentions of Derek shepherd’s Death, Trauma, Flashbacks, Cristina and Blake are like soulmates, injuries, mentions of Cutting an LVAD wire.

“So he totally is Like Meredith’s McDreamy, Huh?” Cristina said over the Phone call, Blake Hissed at her to shut up as she was in the Female Attendings Locker room, Pulling on her Dark Blue Scrubs. “Cristina!” She Whisper Shouted.

Cristina Snorted before ending the call, She Met Stephen Outside heading towards the Nurses Station to get and find there own Cases, like Any hospital Worked. “By the way where are your Stupid Interns?” He asked. Blake stopped, blinking her eyes noticing that none of her little Suck ups were around her, Malia Noticed the Doctor becoming Suspicious and Knew she had to tell on the Poor Interns.

"Doctor Shepherd, one of your Patients on the transplant list came back in after his heart was failing again despite the LVAD, They've been in his room for an hour now, I think his name was Daniel Cooper." Malia said, Blake had a bad feeling about all this, She nodded at Stephen and Malia to come with her. The Trio Scrambled to Cooper's Room, standing in shock when they saw what was happening. "What the hell.." Blake mumbled, her eyes widened in shock, seeing Amy Pumping his heart Manually as the LVAD Wire was cut with a Pair of Scissors next to it. "Amy, What the hell did you do?!" She Practically yelled, "and why are all you fools helping her?!"

Amy didn't respond continuing to Pump his heart, Blake looked at Stephen who shook his head, she nodded to Malia, "Malia take over Pumping his Heart, and Amy step away from the Patient." Malia Nodded and Tried to gently take the device away but Amy screamed no and said not to touch her, Blake Ignored Amy for now telling Malia to stay with her and to help Amy if she allowed her to, Blake turned to the three other Idiot doctors, "You three, In the hall. Now." She ordered.

Blake was angry, seething even. "What the hell were you three thinking, you could have killed that Patient." She said, Stephen was right next to her agreeing with her words, "Even worse, you could have endangered your careers and be sued for assaulting a Patient." Stephen added. David Tried to speak but Blake shushed him, "No, Not a word, you are not to speak, Not a single word, I don't wanna have to Testify against any of you fools." She said.

The Group was silent for a moment, “I assume you ran labs..” She said, Her eyes showing a Furious anger and Disappointment. They stayed Silent only fueling her Annoyance and anger, "Well?..." She demanded. James spoke, "you told us not to speak-"

"I know I did, Now did you run labs?!.." Blake said, tapping her foot impatiently, David Nodded, Blake sighed as she gave out orders, "Okay, Shelby Jack's been asking for you." She said giving her the order to go, before turning to the rest of the amazingly idiotic Interns, "David go get those labs and come right back, do not talk to anyone, go straight there and back."

Then She turned to James, "Now you, follow me and Stephen Right now."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Few Hours later and both Blake and Stephen were making sure Mr. Cooper was okay, She listened to his heart with her Stethoscope sighing at how weak it sounded. "Why Amy... Why would you do this?.." She said, Continuing to to Listen to his heart while Stephen did a quick Neuro Exam to ensure he was okay in the head, no concussion or any Brain Bleed whatsoever. "Because he needs that heart and I love him.. I love him so damn Much Doctor Shepherd.." The Intern Whispered, Blake shook her head sighing In Disappointment.

"Oh for God's sake, you fell in love with a Patient.." Blake sighed, exasperated, Stephen was really trying to hold back all his anger at the Interns. "Well his Brain is Okay, No signs of anything wrong with his brain." Stephen Said. David Came in with the Labs, "Labs are back, His State is becoming worse." Blake sighed Knowing exactly what that Meant. Amy Spoke now, "He'll get the heart right, He's gonna get the heart? He has to. You'll Sign the papers that he'll be put at the top of the list-" She was quickly Interrupted by Blake's cold tone.

"Those are the Kind of things I would tell a doctor, and right now you are not a doctor, you are a Visitor." She said, her eyes showing how furious she actually was. "What?.." Amy asked in complete and utter disbelief. "You will no longer be a doctor in this Hospital until I say Otherwise. Now Step away from Mr. Cooper and let Malia Take over." She Ordered.

Malia came over slowly taking it away from Amy as Blake Glared at her slightly, making the rest of the Interns Shrink underneath her Gaze.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blake told Stephen to carry on with the rest of his Surgeries while she went to talk to the Chief of the hospital about this certain Incident without exposing her Interns for doing this.

She asked the Chief about a Hypothetical Question with the exact same Situation, In which she explained that Mr. Cooper move to the top of the list and receive the heart Immediately but ordered that whoever did that was to be in her Office for Intense Consequences for endangering a Patients Life.

Blake nodded, "Of course, Ma'am."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Which ended with the Interns getting yelled at by the chief and forced to not even go near a Surgical case unless they fessed up on who did it and to share one single Patient to give her what she needed.

Later on Blake was sitting at the Nurses Station, Checking on different Patient files and Images, as Stephen was Charting, "So, How bad was their Punishments?" Stephen asked with a Snide Smirk on his face. Blake sighed, Shaking her head. "The Chief said no more surgeries until they confess that Amy did it and they had to share one singular Patient." She snorted, Searching up another Patient file.

Malia was now delivering Labs due to Blake's Interns being Punished for their Stupid decisions, "Here you go Blake, Imaging is back for Ms. Collins." She said handing her the Tablet. Blake looked it over smiling to herself, "Oh.. I could use a little Great Neuro Case." She muttered. Stephen Looked up Suddenly Interested, Raising his eyebrow, "Oh no Mister, You have your own Solo Neuro Surgery in 30 Minutes, you need to get ready for that, I've got this one." She said, smirking to herself before teasing him. "Besides this woman has a nail in her head." She said, before rushing off.

Stephen Chuckled to himself, "Well Played, Doctor Shepherd."

[arpov-blog-blog]

“I need to show that I'm stronger in South Carolina than New Hampshire,” Haley told Meet The Press on January 28. “It certainly has to be close.”

There was a logic to this: Haley hails from South Carolina and she’s its former governor. Republicans in her home state have been pulling the lever for her for nearly twenty years. They know her. If there were any state where she’d have the chance to challenge Trump, South Carolina was it.

But Haley’s plan has gone to hell: Polls show Trump is leading Haley by 30 points—more than twice his New Hampshire margin. It turns out that in South Carolina, with the people who know her best, Haley is doing worse with both Democrats and Republicans.

“Nikki Haley on behalf of all of us, lose our number,” a South Carolina Democratic voter named Debari Barber posted Friday on Facebook.

That post touched a nerve among fellow black voters, Democrats, and independents, prompting 2,100 favorable shares and 530 supportive comments before Barber made it private. The volume of the response was unexpected for Barber, a 41-year-old banking analyst who told The Bulwark she just wants the Haley spam to stop. Barber said she keeps replying “stop” to the messages and blocks the number, only to have a new phone number text her more pro-Haley content.

“My cousin’s son is only 12 and he keeps getting text messages and he started asking ‘Mama, who is Nikki?’ It’s just aggravating,” she said. “Take us out the group chat. We don’t want to be in it.”

No one who supports Haley is able to tell me what state they think she will win. In addition to the Haley campaign’s efforts, the pro-Haley SFA Fund super PAC is mailing Democratic voters to remind them that they can still vote for Haley if they didn’t cast a ballot in the Democratic primary.

“Nikki is attracting a wide range of voters,” her campaign spokeswoman, Olivia Perez-Cubas, said in a written statement. “If you go to her events, you see conservatives, independents who feel they don’t have a home in either party, and Reagan Democrats who are frustrated with Biden’s policies. Trump lost races we should have won in 2018, 2020, and 2022. If Republicans want to start winning again, we need to be a story of addition, not subtraction.”

But there’s only so much support Haley can earn from South Carolina voters like Danny Davis, a 36-year-old chef from Rock Hill who also never voted for Haley and said she never will.

“The text messages are very weird,” Davis told The Bulwark. “She has texted me more than Biden. It’s very asinine that she’s texted people she was supposed to represent but she didn’t do a good job doing it when she was in office. It’s pandering at best. She didn’t really care about Black people before.”

Dawson dismissed that last remark as unfair and pointed out that Haley, as governor in 2015, removed the Confederate flag from the South Carolina State House, which Haley referenced on Monday during an event in Sumter.

Join now

Putting Haley’s record aside, she would struggle with turning out black voters or any group traditionally not aligned with Republicans in a Republican primary, said Scott Huffmon, a pollster and political scientist at Winthrop University in South Carolina, who released a survey last week showing Trump beating her 65–36 percent in the state."

[dear-indies]

Hey, I guess this new Twumblr is not into giving notifications on its messenger. Can you point me (and others) toward content you would like GIFs of for disabled FCs? And what size (width, height, file size) should they be? (I haven't made GIFs in a long time, okay.) I probably won't get to do anything until the weekend but one can dream that it'll be sooner.

Hey! Thank you so so much. There's a masterlist HERE of actors with roles listed and then thee are people with content available on youtube! I'd honestly I'd love medium-sized gifs I don't know their exact size but you can find loads of them in the "gif pack" tag anddddd I'll bold the people I'd personally love resources of but anybody would be wonderful.

Channels:

Spencer West (1981) - double-leg amputee and is gay.

Josh Sundquist (1984) - is a leg amputee - also has posted some shorts!

Jessica Kellgren-Fozard (1989) has hypermobile EDS with marfanoid phenotype causing blindness in one eye and deafness, also has ADHD - is a lesbian.

Jordan Bone (1990) - is quadriplegic.

Sweet Anita (1990) - has Tourette's syndrome including coprolalia, is demisexual.

Jo Beckwith (1991) - is a double leg amputee.

Shane Burcaw (1992) - has spinal muscular atrophy.

Hannah Witton (1992) - has ulcerative colitis.

Molly Burke (1994) - is blind and demisexual.

Lauren Spencer (1996) African-American - has Lou-Gehrig’s disease - worth noting that she's also an actress!

Briel Adams-Wheatley (?) Brazilian - is a double leg and arm amputee and is a trans woman - has tiktok content that gif icons can be made of!

Shorts:

Prince Amponsah (1985 or 1986) Ghanaian - is a double arm amputee, with his right arm amputated above the elbow and his left arm amputated below the elbow.

Jacob Mundell (?) - congenital hand amputee - has posted his demo reel which would make a great small pack!

Joci Scott (?) woman of colour but otherwise unspecified - is paraplegic - posts short scenes on her youtube which would also make a great small pack!

Interviews:

Michael J. Fox (1961) - has Parkinson’s Disease.

Warwick Davis (1970) - has spondyloepiphyseal dysplasia congenita.

Selene Luna (1971) Mexican - has dwarfism.

Kurt Yaeger (1977) - is a leg amputee.

Rana Daggubati (1984) Telugu Indian - is blind in one eye.

Ali Stroker (1987) - is paraplegic and bisexual.

Josh Thomas (1987) - is autistic, has ADHD, and is gay.

Ruth Madeley (1987) - has spina bifida.

Melissa Johns (1990) - is an arm amputee.

Steve Way (1990) - has muscular dystrophy.

Sky Cubacub (1991) Filipino - non-binary (they/them and xem/xyr) - anxiety, panic disorders, depression, C-PTSD, PCOS, unspecified environmental illnesses and undiagnosed stomach disorder.

Danielle Perez (?) Afro-Dominican - lower leg amputee and is queer.

Zion Clark (?) African-American - is a double leg amputee.

+ as always please feel free to leave suggestions either for this ask or for my masterlist!

[frogblast-the-ventcore]

That would require Davy Perez & Akiva Goldsman to start considering the Gorn as either not "evil" (Goldman's words) - they aren't, that's the point of "Arena" - or not something where "we have no idea what [they] are really like" (Perez's words) - we do, they're bipedal, reptilian, intelligent people, not crude Xenomorph copies.

This is perhaps, my most intensely disliked aspect of SNW. If they had done the exact same stories, but given the aliens within a name that wasn't already associated with a well-known species - one that we know becomes friendly - and didn't fundamentally change said species' biology into something quite different from the standard depiction of them during the franchise (yes, technically the supplemental books and such aren't canon, but we do have McCoy's statement about them in Into Darkness), I would've been fine with those episodes. They would have been all right!

"All Those Who Wander" would still be the weakest episode of the show (so far) for being a complete cut-and-paste of Alien with dashes of Predator, The Thing, and Wrath of Khan, but I wouldn't hate them like I do now.

I LOVE Strange New Worlds, I really do, but the way they have handled the Gorn is really a smack to the face of a species who have been a part of canon since the beginning, and who were the direct subject of one of Trek's most powerful messages. Is there reasonable discussion to be had over the events of the episode, such as who was in the right as far as the Cestus III incident? Yes. But when it comes down to it, "Arena" told us:

"Just because we don't understand The Other, or fear them, doesn't mean we shouldn't see them as people, and treat them as such."

The Gorn have shown up a few more times in the series' history, and while there were some missteps (ENT "In A Mirror Darkly, Part 2", looking at you with Slar), the series has kept that message strong both in general and with the Gorn specifically. Lower Decks has shown us Gorn getting married, Gorn chefs, Gorn in civilian clothes going about their day. That is the Gorn I want to see.

Love that the Lower Deckers showed up and were like "hey, space racism is bad."

Can Boimler please also lecture them about the gorn and how they are actually a fully developed species you can be at peace with?

[notbang]

social distancing suggestions 👩🏻‍💻

[meowmeowmessi]

Waittt, why is Perez considered a wincest god and who are the other gods?

Perez is one of my personal favorite writers of the later seasons! Let's take a lil look at the episodes he's written so far: American Nightmare, Stuck in the Middle (With You), Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell, Tombstone, Breakdown, The Thing, Mint Condition, Damaged Goods, Don't Go In The Woods (with Nick Vaught), Atomic Monsters, The Gamblers(with Meredith Glynn). 

An anon of Lol-jackles' has already said this, but I think Perez is a good writer who understands the brothers' dynamic really well! And he writes Sam really well too. American Nightmare has the Bert and Ernie pretext going on, in Breakdown we have Sam being depressed about losing Mary and Jack and Dean being worried about him and then later protective!Dean! In The Thing we've got Sam fussing over Dean's cholesterol-heavy diet like a worried wife and then later a repeat of AHBL Part 1 wherein Sam gets kidnapped from a diner and Dean goes bonkers, MINT CONDITION speaks for itself tbh, Damaged Goods is part of the s14 Wincest Trifecta (the other two being Prophet and Loss and Lebanon), in Don't Go In The Woods we get to see Sam and Dean arguing about Jack like an old married couple arguing about the right way to raise their son (wait that's exactly what was happening in that episode lol), and in Atomic Monsters we see Dean saying that Sam is the one who pulled Dean out of his funk ("But you know what brought me back? *looks at Sam in the passenger seat* You did."), and last but not least, The Gamblers!!! A fantastic bro-centric episode imo!!! (Who can forget the infamous Two Forks scene?) Certainly healed the scar that The Heroes' Journey had left on my soul *shudders*

(I've heard that hellers say that Perez's Tombstone is a destiew centric episode and man oh man if THAT'S what they call a destiew episode then I just feel bad for them lmao)

Here we have Perez's tweet about Mint Condition:

Who are the other gods? Gosh, who ISN'T? We've got Kripke and J2 themselves and back in his non-pandering days Misha called wincest his otp, and let's be real, the show is about the brothers so anyone writing for it has to be a bit of a wincest shipper. No two ways about it 😁😁

[tiktaalic]

I’ve talked ad Infinitum about davy does homages which is to say. He goes wow cool visuals. And then says well my job is done and turns his script in which drives me. Nuts. Girl the themes. The themes? Where are. The themes. This drives me nuts abt the reservoir dogs ep and the noes ep and of course. The gonch ep. I do think. Much like stuck in the middle with you. Goncharov ep fails upwards. Because it may be a rip off episode on a cw show of an acclaimed filmé. But you show me dean winchester taking a drag of a cigarette IN his katya drag and I clap clap clap like a seal. Side note to say. It’s endlessly funny. That there are three main characters in supernatural. And in goncharov. And davy Perez goes. Hm well dean will be goncharov and cas will be Andrey and then they can take turns being katya. Crowley can also take a turn at katya as well. And sam? Well sam will play sam winchester.

My point is. Supernatural is good when it’s bad. And it’s intoxicating. When they start throwing around these characters with hundreds of pages of analysis attached to them without understanding the bulk of that analysis. Because then EYE get double analysis. Wow two cakes ass episode. And like. As much as I think the homages suck I love that they suck I love that I get to deconstruct them and compare and contrast how much dean ISN’t goncharov vs how he is and What It Means about what aspects they chose to highlight as shared and what aspects (aka the judas kiss) that they go uhhhh we are NOT doing that. Anyway. Crazy that on my screen dean kins the gonch, a gun toting bisexual man who certainly does NOT id as bisexual who does what he does for The Family. A man who spawned a thousand thinkpieces about the entwinement of male intimacy and violence. An that he kins him. Dressed to the nines in katya drag but make it palatable for a middle america that is a season away from saying #nobisexualityfordean. And LOVING it and not even know it’s what he’s doing just relaxed sprawled and comfortable and and embodying this role effortlessly

[letters-from-x]

A radical feminist’s reading list-

Classic

The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir

The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan

Sexual Politics by Kate Millett

On Lies, Secrets, and Silence: Selected Prose, 1966-1978 by Adrienne Rich

The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf

Fiction

The Power by Naomi Alderman

Salt Slow by Julia Armfield

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

Native Tongue by Suzette Haden Elgin

The Vagina Monologues by Eve Ensler

Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado

The Gate to Woman’s Country by Sheri S. Tepper

History

Women’s Work: The First 20,000 Years by Elizabeth Wayland Barber

Caliban and the Witch: Women, the Body, and Primitive Accumulation by Silvia Federici

The Living Goddesses by Marija Gimbutas

The Creation of Patriarchy by Gerda Lerner

Who Cooked the Last Supper? The Women’s History of the World by Rosalind Miles

Women of Ideas: And What Men Have Done to Them by Dale Spender

Headstrong: 52 Women Who Changed Science-and the World by Rachel Swaby

Intersectional

Women, Race & Class by Angela Y. Davis

Ain’t I a Woman: Black Women and Feminism by bell hooks

It’s Not About the Burqa by Mariam Khan (editor)

Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches by Audre Lorde

This Bridge Called My Back: Writings by Radical Women of Color by Cherríe Moraga (editor) and Gloria Anzaldúa (editor)

Lesbian

Unpacking Queer Politics: A Lesbian Feminist Perspective by Sheila Jeffreys

The Disappearing L: Erasure of Lesbian Spaces and Culture by Bonnie J. Morris

Homophobia: A Weapon of Sexism by Suzanne Pharr

Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence by Adrienne Rich

Liberal vs. radical

Female Erasure: What You Need to Know about Gender Politics’ War on Women, the Female Sex and Human Rights by Ruth Barrett (editor)

End of Equality by Beatrix Campbell

Feminisms: A Global History by Lucy Delap

Daring to be Bad: Radical Feminism in America, 1967-1975 by Alice Echols

Gender Hurts: A Feminist Analysis of the Politics of Transgenderism by Sheila Jeffreys

Freedom Fallacy: The Limits of Liberal Feminism by Miranda Kiraly (editor) and Meagan Tyler (editor)

The Sexual Liberals and the Attack on Feminism by Dorchen Leidholdt (editor) and Janice G. Raymond (editor)

The Transsexual Empire: The Making of the She-Male by Janice G. Raymond

We Were Feminists Once: From Riot Grrrl to CoverGirl, the Buying and Selling of a Political Movement by Andi Zeisler

Pornography, prostitution, surrogacy & rape

Against Our Will: Men, Women and Rape by Susan Brownmiller

Slavery Inc.: The Untold Story of International Sex Trafficking by Lydia Cacho

Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexuality by Gail Dines

Being and Being Bought: Prostitution, Surrogacy and the Split Self by Kajsa Ekis Ekman

The Industrial Vagina: The Political Economy of the Global Sex Trade by Sheila Jeffreys

Only Words by Catharine A. Mackinnon

Know My Name by Chanel Miller

Not a Choice, Not a Job: Exposing the Myths about Prostitution and the Global Sex Trade by Janice G. Raymond

Women as Wombs: Reproductive Technologies and the Battle Over Women’s Freedom by Janice G. Raymond

Psychology & trauma

Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft

Delusions of Gender: How Our Minds, Society and Neurosexism Create Difference by Cordelia Fine

Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence – From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror by Judith Lewis Herman

Toward a New Psychology of Women by Jean Baker Miller

Theory

Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Gyn/Ecology: The Metaethics of Radical Feminism by Mary Daly

Last Days at Hot Slit: The Radical Feminism of Andrea Dworkin by Andrea Dworkin, Johanna Fateman (editor) and Amy Scholder (editor

The Dialectic of Sex: The Case for a Feminist Revolution by Shulamith Firestone

Feminism is for Everybody: Passionate Politics by bell hooks

Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center by bell hooks

Against Sadomasochism: A Radical Feminist Analysis by Robin Ruth Linden (editor), Darlene R. Pagano (editor), Diana E. H. Russell (editor) and Susan Leigh Star (editor)

Toward a Feminist Theory of the State by Catharine A. Mackinnon

The Sexual Contract by Carole Pateman

Other

Without Apology: The Abortion Struggle Now by Jenny Brown

Close to Home: A Materialist Analysis of Women’s Oppression by Christine Delphy

Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed, Misdiagnosed, and Sick by Maya Dusenbery

Beauty and Misogyny: Harmful Cultural Practices in the West by Sheila Jeffreys

Are Women Human? And Other International Dialogues by Catharine A. Mackinnon

Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado Perez

A Passion for Friends: Toward a Philosophy of Female Affection by Janice G. Raymond

How to Suppress Women’s Writing by Joanna Russ

Man Made Language by Dale Spender

Counting for Nothing: What Men Value and What Women are Worth by Marilyn Waring

[loveinterestcastiel]

Long post ahead, sorry, but I can’t be the only one who remembers this stuff, right?? i.e. the funko scenes from Atomic Monsters (15x04, Davy Perez wrote, Jensen directed)??

The first one came to pass on screen in the finale, when Sam and Dean discuss the mime-vampire case under the big tree.

The second came to fruition only partially. Upon Dean’s arrival at the Heaven Roadhouse, Bobby tells him only that “Cas helped”. However, the funko pops in 15x04 imply that Cas was supposed to be there. Not Bobby. So what happened?

Some seriously fucked up and suspicious shit is what happened. Take a look:

The water tower on Becky’s desk, also in 15x04, was a hint about a filming location for the finale, that we know they made it to and filmed at because of the SPN tapeball Instagram account. On August 29 2020, the tapeball account posted a picture of the real water tower and the tapeball with the caption “About to drown....in tears”.

Now this... this location, and the scenes shot there, never made it to air. We also know that there are 11 shots missing from episode 20 (if someone could dig out the chart plotting out what scenes fit where, I’d love to insert that here)

So here’s the thing about the SPN tapeball! It’s consistently colour-coded. Jensen is blue, Jared is red, and Misha is green. On the outside of the tapeball (therefore, the scenes most recently shot) we see red, blue, and a metric-ton of green on the left.

So where was Misha?? What happened to Cas?

Fuckery, my friends. He was there. (There’s a screenshot someone took of the view from his window when he was quarantined in Vancouver, don’t ask me how the fandom figured that one out bc it’s complicated but just go with it, Michael Sheen confirmed it during the SuperGood video thing, etc. there’s more but I don’t have time for that rn. Feel free to add on to the post if you have the receipts/pictures)

If I had to guess, even though I hate to do that, I’d say Misha shot his scenes, which were presumably set in Heaven, but they were cut, and he only found out as the show aired. Unfortunately, this sort of thing is not uncommon in the entertainment industry. What really stings is that he sat his kids down to watch the finale with him after never letting them watch the show before, only to see the absolutely frankensteined/chopped up/weak/VValker promoting nightmare of an ending that aired. Talk about a slap in the face (or being stabbed in the back...)

And so it goes- no closure. No resolution. And then the fandom divided itself (cult accusations, toxic discourse, etc. ensued from people I shall not name directed at people I shall not name). And now, non-polol and non-polol-adjacent people are starting to loudly question Why The Hell this was able to slide under the majority of the fandom’s noses in the first place after shaming the people who’ve tried to address it from the beginning, but I don’t really care about how we got here. (Full disclosure, I’m only polol-adjacent. Not in the server but I follow many of the people who are, and when I tell you that they’ve publically been addressing this stuff for ages now I mean it. They never really hid anything if you knew where to look, but some people hate inside jokes between friends, apparently. Not my business) All this crap happened for one reason: because network PR is a machine. It’s intentional, it’s calculated, and it doesn’t give a flying fuck about feelings, representation, or ethics. It’s a gaslighting, money-making game that’s up for anything; queerbaiting is only the tip of the iceberg of rampant industry-wide sexism, racism, homophobia, and ableism. But it FREQUENTLY fucks up. And they did with regards to SPN, many, many times. Like the C/W Philly account. Oopsies!

Now that we’re all finally on the same page, let’s not let this go. I know other people have had these ideas before me, but I needed to get all this written out in one place.

It’s not a conspiracy. It never was. It happened right in front of our eyes. And this is nowhere NEAR all of it.

[mlobsters]

supernatural s15e15 gimme shelter (w. davy perez)

DEAN Well, right now, weak is all we have, okay, 'cause nobody's found anything. And without Amara, we're screwed. So, Atlantic City? All-you-can-eat prime rib, and possibly one all-powerful cosmic being. Come on, man, sounds like a roadtrip to me.

it sounds good to me but i've been striking out with this season in the fun department :p

cracking up at cas trying to get sam to back him up that taking jack on a murder investigation is a bad idea, but sam backs dean instead and dean is so pleased. and jack is just happy to be involved. reminds me of that scene in hannibal 2x10

(rocktheholygrail)

all right so we get cas and jack being awkward with local law enforcement, that's a combo.

JACK Like Sam always says, when in doubt, try social media. CASTIEL Oh, yeah. I did that once. There were so many cat photos, it was just... There were too many cats.

gasp

JACK It says I need a parent or guardian's permission to join. CASTIEL You have my permission. JACK Ah. I have his permission.

cheap but i'll take it, it was cute

ZACK No one's making deals. Like, at all. Uh, Rowena has a hard "people will end up where they belong" philosophy. It can be nice, less quotas. But, like, look at me, uh, a crossroads demon who can't bring in a deal? Like, what even am I? CASTIEL You're a deviant soul corrupted by Hell. ZACK Well, yeah, yes, but II mean more in, like, a work-life-balance sense.

look at this, throwing the bog standard demon a bone and having some personality, and the potential changes rowena would make

SAM That's not what I meant. We've been on the road for almost two days, and I get not wanting to talk about it, I do, but, you know, what we're planning on doing, killing Amara. DEAN Well, we're not pulling the trigger. SAM Sure, but we still have to find her. And then, if we find her, we have to lie to her. We got to set her up for her own death. DEAN Hey, man, Billie called us "Messengers of God's Destruction," okay? Did you think that was, what, gonna be easy? Bloodless? Mhmh. We knew there was gonna be a catch. Least this time it's not you or me.

okay. i'm not sure i'm following here. it's like they have some good feelings about amara and they're bummed about having to kill her. but aside from the whammy on dean, do they? like, she decided to not wipe out existence and no one had to kill themselves to take her out, and she brought mary back so maybe there's some feelings from that? anyway, don't really get this but ok. i'm also not convinced she actually has to die, but whatevs

JACK Well, I have more dads than most, and I always just feel like I'm letting all of them down.

a) cute cute b) oh, jack

spn s5e8 steve bacic as dr. sexy / s15e15 as pastor joe

thought this pastor joe guy looked familiar, apparently he was dr sexy in changing channels 5x08. and 3 episodes (as different characters) of the xfiles! oh okay i looked him up before lol, he was in the episode pusher as someone who was compelled to kill themselves by the baddie. didn't apparently deem it worth an hiky though

PASTOR You have kids? CASTIEL I, uh... It's complicated.

find it kind of interesting how jack talks about his dads straight up but when other people talk to said dads, they deflect to avoid saying they have a kid specifically. or maybe i just selectively remember the times they worm around the question

PASTOR It's kind of part of the job. My wife, she grew up in this church and loved it. They were a bit more hardcore back then. Chalked everything that happened up to God's will. Never seemed to realize that– CASTIEL God just doesn't care.

getting some laughs out of me. look at you, davy

sitting on the cold, wet car 😩

appreciate their commitment to filming in whatever weather, and at least in some shots showing them with the rained on/snowed in hair

so, based on that dun dun DUN type music, are they wary about the amara business just because she's you know, a juiced up god and presumably hard to kill? and not because they don't want to kill her?

SAM How'd you find us? AMARA I smelled you from two states over. You have a very distinctive musk. DEAN Thank you.

okayyy. that's something. he's pleased, for whatever reason

CASTIEL My name is, um well, my name's not important. I do know what blind faith is. I used to just follow orders without question, and I did some pretty terrible things. I would never look beyond the plan. And then, of course, when it all came crashing down, I found myself lost. I didn't know what my purpose was anymore. And then one day, something changed, something amazing. I… I guess I found a family, and I became a father. And in that, I rediscovered my faith. I rediscovered who I am.

ha. after i just said they never tell outsiders that they do have a kid. here's cas, stepping up. i have no clue what the timeline would be on the, found a family thing. i have a terrible time keeping his plotlines straight

SAM The former Death, he told us you were the firstborn. AMARA Or he told you what you needed to hear.

they seem a little rattled about that, but they know billie hasn't always been right about everything in the past so it seems reasonable to not talk everything she says at face value? and presumably same for death 1.0

AMARA Chuck and I, we're twins. Creation and destruction, light and dark, balance. And when we split apart, all this was created. SAM The Big Bang? AMARA Eh.

huh. ok. how does that work with the alternate universes then? i feel like this is a very loosely thought out idea :p

this is very se7en :p if dude wakes up to thrash around....

DEAN No, no. No. Why did you bring her back? You said that you wanted to show me something, that you wanted to, uh to teach me something. I don't know if you were following along, but your little experiment, it came to a not-so-happy ending. My mom is dead. So what exactly did you want to show me? What was the point?

AMARA I wanted two things for you, Dean. I wanted you to see that your mother was just a person, that the myth you'd held onto for so long of a better life, a life where she lived, was just that, a myth. I wanted you to see that the real, complicated Mary was better than your childhood dream because she was real. That now is always better than then. That you could finally start to accept your life.

kind of shocked we're having this meaningful character moment and not plowing along with the plot. i... well. i'll be generous and attempt to believe that this was actually thought about when they brought mary back

DEAN And the second thing? AMARA I thought having her back would release you, put that fire out. Your anger. But I guess we both know I failed at that. DEAN You're damn right. Look at you. Just another cosmic dick rigging the game. You're just like your brother.

can't really argue with that, but they're making her out to be very nice this time around

AMARA It was a gift, Dean, not a trial. DEAN I'm not angry, Amara. I'm furious. To know that all my life, I've been nothing but a hamster in a wheel, stuck in a story. And you know whose fault that is? Chuck's. And it ain't just me. We're all trapped. Sam and Cas and Jack and even you. And you want to talk about the people that he's killing right now AMARA Stop. DEAN Why? He's not stopping. And you're doing nothing to stop it. Think he gives a rat's ass about you? Well, now who's living in a dreamworld?

this is all very convincing manipulation if he's just trying to maneuver her into a situation where she can be killed

PASTOR Whatever she needs, whatever it takes, I'll find a place where she can get help. I spent my life taking care of all these other people. Should've been taking care of her.

the subplot of the murdering pastor's daughter, all the meaningful looks between cas and jack. cas getting to come in and save the day, fingers, gut stab wounds

now cas and jack get to have a nighttime car chat about their feelings

JACK When we – When I kill Chuck and Amara, I'll die, too. CASTIEL What? JACK Billie's spells have been turning me into some kind of bomb, and when I go off, God and Amara will cease to exist. And... I won't survive. JACK Don't tell Sam and Dean. CASTIEL Oh, yeah? Why not? JACK They won't understand. But I know... This is the only way they'll ever forgive me.

of course! well, i can't say i'm surprised

CASTIEL No. I watched you die once, and I will not do it again. JACK It's not your choice.

true that

DEAN Wait. What's happening? Where are you going? CASTIEL Going to look for another way. I have to. DEAN What the hell are you talking about? CASTIEL Dean, in case something goes wrong and I don't make it back, there's something you and Sam need to know…

distressing way to leave the episode but ok. so that mean he's not keeping jack's secret? that's good

(wiki)

Alex Calvert posted a photo of the volunteer registration form Jack filled out at the Community Center

lol ok. that's a lot of exclamation points. and the marital statue made me laugh

didn't bitch my way through this ep, i'll take it