#CHAT LET HIM COOK
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qkrovv · 4 days ago
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devildomwriter · 4 months ago
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“Problematic”
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When the Prince of demons is surprised how problematic you are 😂
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mcaxolotl · 2 years ago
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Idk what it was but chat was so fucking funny this stream 💀💀
some of my favorite lines:
AND THE CROWD IS AFRAID 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥
HES BURNING THE UBER EATS 🔥🔥🔥🔥
HE CAN COOK… BUT I AINT EATING SHIT 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
WHAT IS BRO SAYING 🔥🔥🔥
You are cooking sushi with a microwave
AND THE CROWD GOES MILD 🔥🔥
AND THE CROWD GOES CONCERNED 🔥🗣️
ITS FUCKING SOGGY
THE KITCHEN HAS WATER DAMAGE 🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
THE CROWD HAS MOTION SICKNESS FROM THE TURN 🔥🔥
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xxplastic-cubexx · 18 days ago
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I just learned that Michael Fassbender tried to get them to make Erik’s hair turn white in Apocalyose when he touches the earth to bring the metal out of the ground for the first time I’m going to eat glass we were so robbed
yeah..
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kkaerikko · 6 months ago
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"You're slowly falling asleep," a depthless hypnosis.
(Boothill x Mesmerizer crossover !!)
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splo0shh · 4 months ago
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"Why me?" "Why not you?"
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nmoroder · 7 months ago
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Normal abt putting people in situations
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months ago
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minedai is so important to me esp when it involves daigo staring at mine with big ass heart eyes and cupids flying above his head and grinning and smiling and fluttering his pretty lashes at him but mines still like Does He Like Me ............. all the while mentally doing the exact same thing towards him
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softquietsteadylove · 7 months ago
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Me again! Could I maybe request a follow up to the lawyer/Thena raising her sisters au? The first one was so good and I'd love to see what happens when Gil comes over to make the lasagna. Thank you :)
"Hey!"
Gil looked up from chopping, just barely catching two heads ducking down behind the back of the couch again to resume pretending to watch tv. He chuckled, glancing briefly to his right, "it's okay, I don't mind."
Thena shook her head though, focusing back on cutting parsley with needlessly forceful chops. "They're only lingering so they can ask you invasive questions, despite me debriefing them earlier."
It was funny that she called it 'debriefing' them. But she had warned him that she didn't have much in the way of friends, so don't be concerned by the endless questions of being her boyfriend, or at least liking her, if not being accused of having a long standing affair with her. That, he had blushed at.
He shrugged though, laughing to himself as he caught the odd eye glancing his way again. "They're kids, I don't blame them for being curious. I did kind of come over uninvited."
"Trust me, it's never gone well when I've attempted to tackle our mother's recipes before," Thena muttered, looking at the hand written notes lovingly propped open on a book stand for their reference. She looked down and pointed with the knife, "like this?"
Gil smiled; the parsley looked like it had been murdered and sawed. He nodded, "looks great. Honestly, even finer--the smaller the better when it goes in the ricotta."
Thena accepted the instruction, resuming hacking at it.
Gil winced for the poor cutting board. "May I?"
Thena just watched as he reached over gently. He moved one hand to the back of the blade and adjusted the wrist of her other, demonstrating the rocking motion of a cleaner cut. "Oh."
"It'll be easier on your hand," he suggested lightly, leaving his ears and the cutting board's longevity aside.
Thena eyed him and the mirepoix he was stirring in the pot with sizzling meat already in it. She continued his work, slower and clumsier, but following his demonstration. "Thanks--this is what I was talking about."
He shrugged, though, adding the garlic and tomato paste to the loudly sizzling pot. "Hey, you wouldn't know this stuff unless it was taught to you. I just happened to be in the kitchen with my grandma a lot as a kid."
Thena stared down at her parsley, looking more and more fine by the moment. "Mother knew I was terrible in the kitchen. Father would remind me ceaselessly that a wife who couldn't cook was like a car with no wheels."
Gil frowned, "that's a pretty messed up thing to say. And to your own daughter?"
She gave him a half a smile and a raise of her sharp eyebrow, "you can tell why Mother's keepsakes are all over the house, while I didn't even keep the car that was in Father's name."
He gave her a little laugh at her joke, no matter how dark. "I guess I don't blame you for that. Moms hold the family together most of the time anyway, right?--taste."
Thena blinked at the speed with which he transitioned from one subject back to their dinner. But she accepted the bite of carrot, blowing before popping it into her mouth. "Hm, still crunchy, but it tastes good."
"Adding the tomato paste and frying it a little first helps get that tinny, acidic taste out, and sweetens it." He reached for the wine, adding a healthy glug or two before reaching for the canned tomatoes. He nodded his head, "want a glass?"
Her eyes darted to the living room.
She was a dutiful guardian, mother or not. Gil smiled, though, nudging the bottle, "one glass won't hurt, right? We're not going anywhere for the rest of the night, and they're fine."
Thena eyed the bottle before sighing, "there are some glasses on the top shelf next to the fridge, I think."
She thought, as in she wasn't sure. But Gil wiped his hands off on the towel he had thrown over his shoulder and moved to the fridge. There were indeed wine glasses still in there, upside down and everything. He pulled two out, admiring the light feel and crystalline shine of them.
"Hey," he whispered, pouring them each a modest glass of a mere few ounces each. He clinked them lightly too, although the quality of the glass still made them ting loudly. "To the first lasagne of many, right?"
That made her smile, and his own smile brightened. Whether it was lasagne or anything else from their mother's hand written recipes, he was happy to help with it. She picked up her glass and gave him a gentle smile over the rim of it. "To the inaugural lasagne."
Her lips looked even more full against the rim of a glass, and when she pulled away he realised for the first time that she wore just a little lip colour when they were in the office.
He averted his eyes from the faint pink on the rim of her glass, looking into his own swirl of red wine. Moving back to the pot he smelled the bubbling mixture. "Usually I'd say to let it simmer for a while, but about fifteen minutes should be fine so we can get things in the oven."
Thena nodded after another sip of her own. "Is the parsley cut enough?"
It was now practically a fine paste it was so chopped. The cutting board was stained green, which of course meant a lot of its flavour was stuck in the wood grain as opposed to still in the leaves. But he grinned, "looks great."
Thena rolled her eyes.
"Hey, really," he laughed, reaching around her for the bowl of ricotta to mix the greens into. "And you said you were terrible at this."
She sighed again, letting her eyes drift back to the couch and to the tv playing some kind of reality show. "Just ask them about the first time I tried baking cookies for them. I'm forbidden from contributing to bake sales. I think they nearly called the CDC on me."
Gil laughed from his belly at that. The heads on the couch turned to watch them again but he was busy looking at Thena, who was laughing faintly at her own joke. Or maybe she was laughing because he was. Either way, she had a cute laugh. "Come on, it couldn't be that bad."
She shook her head though, "poor Sersi had to take over for me to get even one pan of edible merchandise. I had to write a note excusing my poor performance."
Gil caught two pairs of eyes fully spying on them, getting caught be damned. But he slid against the edge of the counter to lean closer. "I mean, I would think they could give you a bit of a break, all things considered."
Thena's expression turned gloomy again, staring into her wine. "I think they do. But everything they send home for them to do feels herculean after a long week, or a big case, or soccer, or-"
The oven beeped loudly at them, announcing its preheating.
Thena gave him a light smile again as she retrieved the casserole dish they had selected. "Ready?"
"I'd say so," he replied gently. He picked up a ladle, first putting in some sauce on the bottom. "This helps to steam the noodles and prevent burning on the bottom layer."
"Hm," Thena mused as she watched him layer the first set of lasagne sheets in. "I thought it was a meaningless old tradition. I never imagined there was a reason for it."
Gil looked back at the recipe, "it's one of those things that you only know if you know. I'm sure your mom never thought of adding in stuff like this."
"No, I suppose not."
He gulped, wondering if he should have brought it up at all. But Thena's smile, although wistful, wasn't really sad. He pointed, "it's your time to shine."
She laughed faintly, scooping out the mixture of ricotta and her pulverised parsley. "I'm lucky I have your expertise."
He blushed. She could have asked him for anything, after he had found out what kind of day she'd had when she texted. He would have fished the moon out of the sky if she asked.
She flicked the spoon for the last glob before he layered on more sauce. "I may have to call on you again the next time we open the book."
He grinned down at the noodles as he laid them. Thena's hands were long but slim, her fingers so delicate and pretty. His sleeves were rolled up for cooking, as were hers. She looked half his size, standing next to him. "Any time, you name it."
"Careful Gil," she murmured, and it almost sounded like she was teasing him playfully. "If this turns out well, they'll be demanding you cook for them all the time."
He was pretty sure he would agree to that, whether by the girls' demand or their sister's. "The defense rests, your honour."
Thena rolled her eyes again at his corny lawyer joke, but she was still smiling at least.
"Okay," he breathed as he ladled on the last layer of sauce. "Get some cheese on this and I believe we'll have a beautiful lasagne in about an hour."
"About an hour?" she asked firmly as she sprinkled on the cheese mixture from the bag. "Don't underestimate my ability to ruin an hour's worth of hard work in the last ten minutes."
"Okay, okay," he chuckled. Thena was adamant in everything she did, from her casework in court, to her determination that she was a blackhole of culinary ability. "Set a timer for 40 minutes, then we'll check it, and I like to broil it for the last five or so, just to get that leopard spotting on the cheese."
"Yes, Chef," she purred (definitely teasing him).
He buried his nose in his wine glass again. He was just about empty, but Thena definitely didn't drink regularly with two teenagers at home, and he didn't come over to get buzzed anyway.
"Here," she said gently, reaching for the glass with the bottle already in hand. He had a polite decline on his tongue when she pulled his hand with hers, topping him up. "I owe you far more than dinner and some wine, but I guess it's a start."
"You don't owe me anything Thena," he frowned even as she poured herself a little more too. He leaned forward again, "really."
She just looked at him, and she was back to being completely unreadable. He dreaded to think what it was like to go up against her in court; not only was her beauty intimidating, but that stare was cold enough to chill his wine to the touch.
"Are you done flirting?!"
Gil tugged at his shirt collar, only to remember that he had already taken off his tie and undone the first two buttons so he wouldn't sweat in the food.
Thena glared at her sister, "I beg your pardon?"
The head of auburn hair ducked down like a startled dog, but didn't retreat entirely. "When's dinner gonna be ready?"
"In an hour," Thena snapped again, but it wasn't her sharp tone that had the girl trembling. If anything, her sharpness seemed familiar and comforting to her sisters.
"Can I have a diet coke?"
"No."
"Come on!" Sprite whined at her, "you're having a fun drink!"
Gil slid his eyes over to his colleague. The evidence was right there, even if he was the one at fault for it.
Thena let out a loud sigh, matching the dramatic energy of her sister(s). "Fine, you can each have one. But if it's gone before dinner, that's it, it's water for the rest of the night."
"Fine," Sprite moaned as she slid off the couch to retrieve them.
Thena glared at her.
"She means thank you," Sersi offered much more sweetly and docilely, even if it was just to appease their sister's glaring. She crept behind her younger sister, holding onto her shoulders the whole way to the fridge. Her eyes darted between them, "it, um, smells nice."
Gil smiled; they were nice kids. Thena had done a great job with them, clearly. "Thanks, I hope I got everything right."
"You can't do worse than her, dude, trust me," Sprite pointed blatantly at their guardian. "She's, like, find a bone in your cereal--bad."
"It was one time."
It wasn't a joke? Where did the bone come from?
"If dinner isn't for an hour," Sersi swayed on the spot, like a child shyly twirling her dress (although she was actually in yoga pants with a green flannel tied around her waist). "Would you like to watch an episode of Ghost Files?"
"Ghost show, huh?" Gil grinned, putting his hand on his hips. He looked over at Thena, who looked maybe even a little sheepish.
"It's our fav," Sprite added, excited at the prospect of sharing their favourite program. "They find evidence, and then Thee tells us if it would be accepted in court."
"None of it would be," she stated outright, "but they still ask me every episode."
She made it sound tedious, but she was smiling just like the other two as they started to move back to the living room. Gil followed, "sounds like a fun family thing."
"If you two sit up properly, there'll be room for Gil to sit," Thena suggested not-so-subtly.
But Sersi and Sprite threw themselves back onto the couch. One side was clearly claimed by each, Sersi's with a fluffy blanket for her legs and Sprite's with a crumpled up throw pillow and snacks on her respective end table.
They pointed. "Or you can sit on the loveseat."
"Yeah, why else have two couches?" Sprite snickered with a mouthful of roasted peanuts.
"Animals," Thena admonished her sisters, and yet took a graceful seat on the smaller sofa adjacent to the tv. She had sat closer, giving Gil the better seat for viewing. She pulled one of her legs up, leaving the other down and her pencil skirt stretching to accommodate her.
He sat down on the other cushion, clutching his wine glass and trying to focus on the show, rather than how he could now smell that Thena also wore a little perfume when she was in the office too.
#Thenamesh Family Law AU#I'm so glad you asked for more of this!!!!#thank you so much and I really liked writing it#okay so they settle in for this show#Thena relaxes a little more and he can see that they really do like their funny little ghost show#he's just happy to see them all having a good time#when the oven beeps he says no don't get up I'll check on it#but Thena is like oh no#Sersi and Sprite are immediately grinning ear to ear#they're giving her the thumbs up and winking and whispering#he's nice!#he's cute!!!#are you sure he's not your boyfriend?#and Thena hisses at them: STOP IT#not that it surprises her#just like it doesn't surprise her that they like Gil or that he's a natural with kids#and that he's a great cook#and that he looks completely at ease with his sleeves rolled up and still in his work clothes#because she couldn't even let him go home and get changed first#they left from work right to the store to get lasagne stuff#because she doesn't even know what she needs for it#so she gets home and they're both still in work clothes and she's like okay lasagne time#it comes out perfectly of course#and they have a wonderful time chatting over dinner and Sprite raves about it#and Thena gets up for water and to pretend she's not crying#Gil of course knows and gets up for seconds so he can comfort her and rub her back over the sink#Sprite and Sersi are just like oh my god they're so obvious#he even brought Thena's plate with him#the SECOND he's out of the house they're like WHENS GIL COMING BACK
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this1contradiction · 1 year ago
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punznap real #confirmed
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vtmgremlin · 1 year ago
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toodleslol · 7 months ago
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Hey chat this is gonna sound crazy but
I think Mr. Puzzles could be redeemed, if he's still alive (I hope he isnt). Karen could get him IN LINE🗣️📢🔥
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f1-birb · 1 year ago
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I've figured out why Lando's got the bucket hat
He took a trip to see Theo and now in the words of Max, "the curls need to marinate"
also he shaved his 'beard' just as I'd gotten used to it and almost fond and idk how to feel
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watermel0ns-dumb-cringe · 5 months ago
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I legit just walked outside to show my parents some cool photography and that spiraled into an hour long conversation about horror movies & psychological horror
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metalfeather · 7 months ago
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Edits - Katar Hol.
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todayisafridaynight · 7 months ago
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speaking of ryuji idk why but i prefer him being a protagonist he was so fun in dead souls and rggo we were robbed😞
Ryuji was just a funny guy like that yk
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