#But will also start freaking out if he feels one single emotion he can't justify

[lienwyn]

hi! i love your art!!!!! can you tell us about your OC who is the star for November? i think i read somewhere that he was hard to draw because there was an allure and mystery about him you felt is best captured by words, but he's so intriguing here. that charm/mystery/beauty/magic combo that's devastating

Hi! Thank you so much, darling 💜 And thank you for the question! I admit I hadn't expected anyone to really care about my characters xD

The OC's name is Nightshade. Or, rather, that's the name he chose for himself since he tends to reject his birth name (sometimes he doesn't even know what his birth name is). He's an OC I created back in 2010-2011 and he's gone through quite some variations since then, probably because I've used him in several different roleplays. He's rarely the main character, though, but rather the one I push into play when things need to happen because he will ALWAYS stir shit up, one way or another. Sometimes as the antagonist but, more often than not, as a morally grey third party who does whatever the fuck he wants.

He should probably be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder but, since he's so good at copying emotions and manipulating people, no one can really tell. The only one who DOES know is his not-husband (but also definitely his husband) Acheron Whittemore who is played by @sjazna. Nightshade tends to imprint on Acheron like a duckling the first time he sees him and then just... never leaves him. Ever. Which is fine by Acheron who should probably also be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, but he's so rich that people don't dare to tell him that to his face.

Nightshade and Acheron have that dynamic where literally nothing else in the world matters but the other and they will burn it to the ground if either of them gets hurt.

(A small problem, though, is that Acheron is as thick as a goddamn brick when it comes to emotions so Nightshade usually pines for a minimum of five years — often closer to ten — before Acheron catches on and realises that Nightshade is in love with him. And it usually takes something really dramatic, like either of them almost dying, before he does so. It's so tragic it's kind of hilarious)

Anyway, Nightshade is one of those characters who's very, very versatile. He can fit into almost any setting and, thanks to his habit of manipulating people, he can also weasel his way into almost any plot you can think of. If he wants to be there, he'll be there.

Because aside from the manipulation part, he's also just very charming in general. He's the kind of person who walks into a room and EVERYONE notices. Not because he's necessarily the most conventionally attractive, but because he's good at presenting himself in a way that's very appealing and eye-catching. And that's why I say he's difficult to draw since he's meant to be a character who's incredibly attractive, but it's not just because of how he looks, but also the way he moves and talks and phrases himself. He's very sensual and graceful, and has a confidence and gravitas that's difficult to capture in one still image.

(Basically, writing and roleplaying Nightshade for several years is probably one of the reasons why it's so easy for me to write Kang Yo Han. I've gotten a lot of practice on how to convey that sort of magnetism xD)

Despite being so versatile, there are always some things that remain the same with Nightshade, though, which is that he's an orphan of unknown age and origin, that he chooses the name Nightshade, his preferred professions are sex worker or assassin (sometimes both at the same time because why not?), he always finds Acheron somehow, and he likes to collect people (who aren't Acheron) like they're Pokémon (i.e. he sees them as pets). He is also a Professional Dramatic Bitch who is an expert at copying emotions but throws a tantrum as soon as he has to deal with his own.

So yeah. Nightshade is a Wild Ride (quite literally if you're willing to pay him ;D)

Fun fact: Nightshade is technically non-binary (he/they) but he's so focused on murder and pining after Acheron that he doesn't realise. It doesn't come naturally to him to explore that sort of thing, so unless someone tells him directly about the concept, he usually never understands that about himself. It DOES show in how he dresses, however, since he often mixes what society deems as feminine and masculine without giving a single fuck. It can also be seen in how he insists on picking his own name since the male name he's usually given isn't one he can identify with. He prefers something gender-neutral.

[eliiflanddd]

I have been thinking about writing something like this for a long time—a sort of gossip column, but I’m not sure. All I know is that I want to be like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. I’m a big yapper like her. I can yap about nothing and everything for hours. I’m not a big talker in real life, but I love writing about my thoughts, not my feelings because, let's face it, feelings are complicated. We don't tolerate emotions here. I used to think I was a lover girl, but apparently, I'm a leaver girl, and it's definetely worse. I figured this out last year when I ghosted a man for the first time. He was a sweet guy, but he just couldn't hold a conversation. I mean if I had to choose between a guy who can't text and a loaded gun, the gun would probably go off. I like my men to be good texters and big yappers you know? If he can't even keep a conversation going, how is he going to keep a marriage together? We need to watch out for these type of things, sisters. Anyway then I realized, "Damn, I didn't know we could just leave people on delivered and never talk to them again. It's funnnnn." (this may be fun for me, but I know it wasn't fun for him. i mean I have my reasons though and it feels justified enough, especially since he was so passive and that's just not doing it for me. I like being dominant, but come on, do something.) I guess I have to accept that I might end up alone, or something. I just feel alone, you know? Does anyone else feel like this, or is it just me not being into love? I mean, I know I can love really well if I get the chance, but the whole process of getting to know someone and turning it into a relationship just seems hard. It's a big change for me, too, because I've never had a relationship and all the responsibilities that come with it. And don't even get me started on "there are plenty of fish in the sea." Because it freaks me OUT! There are so many guys out there, and I'm supposed to commit to just one of them? Do I sound like a man right now? Oh my gosh, maybe I do. I think all the failed talking stages turned me into a different person. I've been thinking about this, too. Are men the only ones who are allowed to treat people poorly in relationships? I can treat a guy like shit, too. I've seen that they don't seem to get hurt, so maybe that's the right path. But if women started to act like men in relationships, wouldn't the human species go extinct? Because let's face it, women are the ones who keep relationships working. They care. Do men not care? If I don't care about the person I'm in a relationship with, does that make me a man? I hope not because I don't like and/or trust them. How can I trust men if men even don't trust men? It's common knowledge not to trust them. Every woman has a reason not to trust them, too—some because of their dad, and some because of, well, every man probably. You get the point, right? Men aren't reliable and now I'm going to be single forever because of it. Even if a man were to beg me to believe him and confess his love for me (this happened last night),

I wouldn't believe it. I've lost my faith and respect for the male sex. I also told him that I didn't believe him, I might've called him a liar too, but that's off-topic. It's hard, you know. Whenever I feel like I can let my guard down for him, the little man-hater inside my head starts screaming and kicking and crying in my ears. I would love to have a boyfriend, don't get me wrong. But I would also want to get married, and I don't want to marry the first guy I see on the street. I'd like to take things slow. Now, this guy who is supposedly in love with me said he'd give me time but also wants attention. I mean, sure, we talk every day, isn't that enough? I'm just tired of trying to date at this time of day. I would genuinely love an arranged marriage, and I'm not even kidding. At least we'd have to marry, I guess because that's the whole point. Also, my mother(who had an arranged marriage) always said arranged marriages last longer, so I don't know; I'll probably have one in the future. As I said, I want a boyfriend, but I also want a husband. So what's the point of boyfriend if not husband? But also, I'm 18, so I can't just marry the first guy I meet. There are so many people in the world; what are the odds of me finding my soulmate out of all these people? I might as well just marry the first guy I meet because there is no way I will actually get to meet my soulmate. But I feel like soulmates and husbands are a topic for another article. Anyway, I know I've said all of this, but I kind of hope that I'll get a boyfriend soon because I'm actually going crazy. I'm going to start college in a month and I've had zero boyfriends in 18 years, so it's getting kind of lame.

Goodbyeeeee <333

[chaos-monkeyy]

Can I respond to you little fandom rant?

In all honesty I used to be one of *those* assholes. I used to look down on short fics, see them and be all like, "blah did they even put effort into this?? It's so shot that's barely a thing why bother." But you know what happened, I fell off my fucking high horse because I actually started reading shorter fics! And like how he hell do people cram so much passion, emotion, story, hotness, into so few words! That in and of its self is a talent! Its like fucking poetry man!

Fandom can be great but it's also sadly a hellhole at times and that is just fucking sad because we are a God damn community and should act like it! Why is the mentality of respect peoples works, write what you like, don't read what you don't like so freaking hard to wrap your head around?

Just be happy and grateful for the content you enjoy and ignor the stuff you don't enjoy. Simple as that. So any way as a reformed asshole that used to look down on drabble/ficlet writers, I would like to apologize for all the idiotic tomfuckery.

Ps. Your works are great, and please never fell guilty for not reading something. Fics shouldn't cause stress and anxiety they are for fun and relaxation. Assuming your friends are good people I'm sure they would agree!

Yeah I find it easy to tell other people I never expect them to read my fic, but a whole lot harder not to feel guilty for not reading All of the Things myself 😂🙈

Anyway I'm too tired to get my thoughts in very good order today (I probably should know better than to reblog while angry, but I can't say I really regret it either 😅)... but that's the thing, innit. I don't care if people don't want to read short fics, or long fics, they're allowed to have preferences! And like everything else, nobody needs to justify those preferences to anyone.

It's when I start seeing those personal preferences touted as Better Than or Worse Than that I get upset. I don't think I've met a single fic writer who doesn't get anxious about whether their fic is good enough on every possible front, and fic length is no exception. I've seen people who write longer works go "ugh I just wish I could write something short for once, how do they do it??", and I've seen people who write shorter things go "Idk if I should even post this, it's not long enough and I'll just clog the tag".

In about a single week's span of time, I saw one writer friend get an anon ask from someone who was apparently annoyed at how much time they "wasted" reading part of their incredibly epic beast of a longfic; and then I see another writer friend get an anon telling them they shouldn't write so much short fic cause longer stuff is better. Short and long works are different things. Neither one is inherently better or reflects more talent than the other, they use different skills. And the great thing about fandom is that there is a place for all of it, and there is stuff out there for all different preferences.

But fic writers already tend to be, on the whole, little bundles of constant anxiety about our writing. Seeing flippantly dismissive or downright mean comments about the type of writing we do is enough to bring anyone down, particular on an already-bad day / week / month / year.

So anyway... idk if any of that made sense, but thank you for the response 💙 And I'm glad you found that you do like short fics as well!

[xx-autmnlvr-xx]

I know it's not the Christmas season but I'm obsessing over Arthur Christmas again and I have to point this out

Steve giving his place as next in line to Arthur really touched something in my heart. It was a shift in his mentality and it showed his character development.

You have to realize something about Steve Claus.

In the movie we learn these things:

Steve was refused something he really wanted from his own father, (who is SANTA) because he didn't touch Malcolm's ego with being santa. (When Steve was 8 he wanted a pool table but Malcom, his father, didn't give it to him because he didn't sit on his lap and ask)

in mortal terms, it's like your parent was a candy factory CEO and they would not give you, their child, candy unless you pay them

Because of this the magic and love of Christmas kind of dulled in Steven's eyes. He assumed it doesn't matter how a child feels, because that's how Malcom made him feel.

So he grew up being more technical in his role as next-in-line. He knew he was gonna be Santa. He was raised to be santa. He was grateful to know that was his destiny and that it was something Malcom would give him.

When he creates the North Pole to be efficient and manageable he felt proud of himself. He had something he could work with and get thanked for!

Or did he?

As we saw in the movie. It was the 'most accomplished Christmas ever' and that was all Steve. He choreographed the elves, he MADE the S-1 that made them deliver presents quickly, and ,from his knowledge, they delivered all the presents! He was happy he could do that!

Then Malcom went and claimed that it was his mission so it was mainly him. He DISVALUED his own sons accomplishment just to get a little confidence boost because, as we saw, he felt insecure about his role as santa.

This made Steve a bit frustrated but he brushed it off because it was supposed to be his father's last night and now it was HIS TURN!! He could get recognition.

That all changed when Malcom declared he would continue being santa.

HE DENIED HIS OWN SON THE DUTIES HE WAS PROMISED BECAUSE MALCOM DIDN'T KNOW WHO HE WAS WITHOUT BEING SANTA

I know some of you are thinking 'yeah but steve is being insensitive' if his accomplishments being disvalued was just the one time thing then I would agree. But it wasn't.

We are hinted at during the dinner that Steve continued getting overshadowed by both his grandfather and his father since he began the north Pole operations. Grandsanta continuously picks at him while Malcom focuses on his place as santa. Maybe his mother cares? Margaret obviously loves both her children. But when you're the children of SANTA you kind of have a weird place in the family.

To me I think both Arthur and Steve get pushed around too much by their family. They are two sides to the same coin. Arthur didn't let getting pushed back hinder his view of Christmas. While Steve saw how he was treated and pushed back to try to get noticed.

Anyways, back to the point.

When the child was missed we see more evidence of Malcolm's AND Steve's insecurities.

While Arthur was worries about the child, Steve tried to cover it up. When Malcom heard a child was missed he IMMEDIATELY shifted the blame.

'oh Steven how could you do that?'

Steve pushed back with, 'me? I thought it was YOUR mission!'

'but it was your department'

Things go on and peter points out that they had the best delivery that year. Steve repeated that to his father by saying

'my DEPARTMENT...' basically mirroring his own father's words.

Then you know what Malcom said? 'well done US'

0_0'

That's not even the end of it!

Toward the end, when the other elves realized the missed child they went to Malcom and asked him.

Being faced by this, he says 'go to Steve. He can explain'

An elf points out, 'but aren't you in charge, sir?'

When they get to the HQ

Steve gets frustrated by all the questions because, to him, why DOES one child matter?? That goes back to his childhood. He HONESTLY thought one child didn't matter because back when he was 8 HE didn't matter. HE didn't get a toy under the tree. If you think he did, I want to point you to the fact that usually Santa only gives ONE TOY to each child. The other presents are usually from the parents. Since the North Pole can't give a lot of presents it's possible that they only give their children one toy each so they save material.

STEVE DID NOT GET A TOY WHEN HE WAS 8. That is WHY he was frustrated at everyone freaking out over this random child.

He LITERALLY SAYS IT 'who cares about one single tiny child?'

I'm not apologizing for Steve but I'm just pointing out why it's justified in HIS eyes.

Steve looks and sees Malcom staring at him and immediately his mind goes to 'oh no. I might never get the role if I don't rephrase that and says that he cares. (Which is a lie but go off)

Malcom starts saying how he's worried about Arthur and says

Malcom literally blamed Steve?

STEVE WASN'T EVEN THERE!!! HE WAS IN BED! Steve left Arthur at HQ WITH MALCOM BESIDE HIM

Malcom claiming it was Steve's responsibility to watch Arthur when Arthur is 20-something is proof of how much Steve gets pushed around and expected to take all responsibility of the negative things.

THEN MALCOM SAID THAT FORGETTING THE CHILD WAS STEVE'S DECISION!!! IN FRONT OF ALL THE ELVES!!! Sure Steve said it more but MALCOM AGREED!! also you don't just push your son under the bus just to look good.

This makes Steve crack a bit. 'i don't care anymore. Here's the location of all the important stuff. You take care of it all. Good night SANTA'

He doesn't even say 'dad' he is finished.

Further on Steve runs to the S-1 because it's getting dented and when he sees it's his parents going to deliver the present he gets even more frustrated.

He gets on. Malcom claims that the s-1 is his (even though Steven BUILT the thing)

Then Steve says this:

That's a face of a man tired of being the after thought of his own dad.

He EXPLODES!! He realizes that he will never get anything he was promised.

You can FEEL the emotion and let me just say that when I first watched this movie. This was the moment I realized BOTH Arthur and Steve played second fiddle. When the movie began I thought Steve was going to be the 'perfect oldest sibling' cliche. (Which as an eldest sibling, I think it puts us in a bad light) and seeing the insecurities of Steve here i nearly cried.

Back to the esssy

Steve gets to drive the s-1 and offhandedly comments how the delivery is the only thing that matters to everyone.

All the Santa's get there and Steve says 'it's so not fair' I'm not quite sure why he said that but I assume it's because he wanted to do something that will be looked positively on him. And at the moment Arthur was nearly in the house.

The bike gets delivered (by Arthur) and they end up in the closet to escape. Arthur asks to watch the kids open it from the closet.

Malcom finally realizes just how blinded he was over wanting to stay santa that he never was a dad. He pats both of their backs and says 'back in my day a pat on the back and a walnut went a long way.'

We get this image:

From the look of Arthur and Steve's face (especially Steve's) we can assume they never had any kind of positive touch by Malcom (No hug or anything???) and it surprised Steve!

Gwen (the child) opens the present and says 'santa brought me the bike I wanted'

Malcom examines Arthur and Steve's faces and tells steve

'you deserve to be santa' (because technically he does. He's the eldest and he was trained for it. But he doesn't have the heart for it)

Getting this recognition from his father, Steve gasps and reacts

Lip pursed like he's biting it, and eyes showing that he was about to cry.

He was acknowledged by his dad. He was told he deserves the role and that surprises Steve! Because before that he was only told that by his assistant, peter the elf, and his brother.

Peter is peter. Arthur is Arthur. They both love him and tell him that. But it doesn't faze him because they have no control over the matter.

Malcom then says 'but I wonder if Gwen was right' (meaning: he wonders if Arthur should be santa because of his heart and love for children)

At this point Steve notices Arthur is still watching the child play and realizes that Gwen would not have had a good Christmas if Arthur hadn't have cared so much about one single child. I think he puts himself in Gwen's place and imagines if his father cared about his Christmas like how Arthur did the child's.

He realizes that what Arthur did was more Santa-like then anything he had done that night. He makes a hard decision and gives the figure of Santa he had in his pocket to Arthur.

This is the part that really REALLY touched me. Imagine being promised something and believing that what you were promised was the only way to be acknowledged and loved by others. Then realizing someone else deserved the role more and giving it to them.

You can see that he's unsure about giving it but he knew it was best for the children. So no one would feel like he did when he was a child.

Malcom tells them that they are both good men and they leave.

That is why I honestly feel like Steve is a wonderful character and why the scene where Steve gave his future to his brother really warmed my heart.

And don't worry

He's happy in the end. I believe Arthur gives all the recognition after the missions to his brother because Arthur is kind and generous like that.

[imasimpforstevengrant]

Why do we like this clown so much?

Change the "we" for "I" and you get an usual tag I use whenever I post my content in Tumblr. And it sounds funny at first but whenever you start diving into that phrase, the deeper it becomes. So, I finally have decided to share my thoughts about this strange but wholesome attraction to this deeply flawed character. It's not something I usually do since I don't know how to write down my feelings properly and also in english so please forgive any typos (I'm from Chile so don't be surprised lol).

So...Why do we like this clown so much?

Why was it that a character precisely designed to scare and to disgust the fuck out of us ended up unchaining a series of feelings that shouldn't have taken place in a beginning?

Let's take a look at the background: Joaquin Phoenix was cast as Arthur Fleck/Joker in 2018. The first image of him as the aforementioned character revealed a deeply disturbed man. We knew the plot. A man driven to insanity after a brutal history of abuse, creating concern in people if the upcoming film would inspire real life violence. Incel violence and mass shootings, more specifically.

(the image in question)

As 2019 arrives, the two trailers generated so much hype that media needed to fuel its concern about it. Since it wasn't your typical comic book film, media basically bombed our minds making us believe this film was going to be a total disaster, an excuse to cause harm to others among other nonsense, as if the film would justify everything Arthur would do in the film, eventually. As the release date is closer, the film receives thunderous applause and unanimous praise from critics. At this, fans rejoiced and expressed impatience to watch the film.

October 5th.

People left the theaters amazed, shocked and genuinely moved by the inhuman treatment Arthur received in the film. The fear media tried so desperately to infuse in us with all the incel bullshit and such turned out to awake one of the most positive, best feelings in humans:

E M P A T H Y

The word that so gloriously cleared away any dark thoughts or actions not only proves media was wrong but it turned out to ridicule it in way nobody will forget: Hundreds of people advocating for mental illness, calling out to the kindness that could change a person's bad day and questioning how politicians and rich people are indifferent to social problems proved how much as a society we have changed in comparison with the one shown in the film.

However, since we are on Tumblr, I'll get straight to the point and try to explain why the fuck does this clown has us dying out of love and compassion (and lust).

I. Background.

As nurturing as we women are for a biological matter, we see a man deprived of a good job, is on seven different medications, working like a slave to sustain his ill mother, putting aside his own health and well-being to look for her, struggling to make his dream of being a comedian despite everyone stepping on him, underpaid and treated like a freak for a disorder he did not ask to suffer, which makes it impossible to be indifferent to all the horrible ordeal that eventually will reach the limit of what he can tolerate without going insane. It is impossible to not say or think, at least, that someone (even if it's just one person) should stand for him just as it is impossible not to feel the need to throw ourselves at him to shield him from people who hurt him or simply offer him our shoulder whenever he has had a bad day, specially when he learns he was sexually assaulted by his step father.

This horrid behaviour terrifies newer generations because they get a taste of what being a social outcast was like more than thirty years ago in comparison with today, where there's more acceptance and treatment for mentally ill people like Arthur. We see in him someone who could have been saved with a proper education and emotional support instead of descending into madness as a criminal. Others simply saw themselves being treated like him at some point in their lives and couldn't help but put themselves in his shoes.

II. Personality.

TRUTH BE TOLD:

There's something called "attraction by proximity". It is the explanation to the eventual love you feel whenever someone doesn't catch your eye at first terms of physical attraction but his/her personality does attract you. This happens to be the base of this situation. His shyness, introverted nature, tenderness and innocent desire to make people laugh and put on a happy face awake some kind of tenderness we cannot resist. This combined with the gloomy background increases our understanding (but not justifying) of the bad decisions he'll eventually take during the course of the film. This traces a line of harsh, almost hurtful contrast of the violence he shows later on the film. Once again, it is not justified in any way but it is certainly understandable.

III. Appearance.

Arthur Fleck is unconventionally attractive.

This happens to be a plus for most women. He is out of the male beauty standards (no abs, not too muscly or particularly tall), which makes him even more unique. It is precisely the fact that he's not a model one of the reasons women love him. He could easily be your man next door or your colleague or the guy you always see but never dare to talk for fear to bother him Because it's about proximity. Arthur looks like your common neighbour. He's not meant to be your typical desirable male protagonist at all.

... And yet.

Jesus Christ, he's so fucking hot I can't even---

It's not about how beautiful his green eyes are, his long slender fingers, his hair or his smile only. It's the charm behind it.

Another "magnet point" is the way he dresses. I know he's impoverished and his wardrobe tend to be repetitive but it is so unpretentious, so simple that is hard to not fall for. The modesty of the shirts, ironed trousers reminds us of a mature man deeply withdrawn into himself, love starved and longing to be seen and loved by others, like a war veteran who still fights the most important war: with himself. Is someone who needs to be listened and understood.

AND OF COURSE WHAT'S NOT TO LIKE ABOUT IT?

He's also brought back the old gentleman outfit, white shirts, red/yellow vest, red suit and elegant dancing moves and the retro style of the film boosts this attractiveness.

People keep comparing him with the previous interpretation of Joker (Leto's) whose costume appealed to young women with a tattooed, gangster, mumble rapper crazy-guy wannabe which didn't connect with the audiences (young people in general). This supposedly was to match or even have a sexy, tormented and desirable villain like Marvel's Loki. We all know how that story ended but it's the link for the next point below.

IV. Transformation

This is a particularly strong point considering how much we loved to watch the process of this weak, powerless, forgotten caterpillar into a beautiful and visible butterfly that will gracefully stir its wings for everyone to see its colours.

When Arthur transitions to the Joker, it's so cathartic to see taking revenge on those who wronged him (even when we're not supposed to root for him) like seeing his shyness fading away into a vivid confidence when dancing half naked in the bathroom, or witnessing him making way to make his name known to people in Murray Franklin's Show:

Adding to this newly gained confidence, there's another turn on: the way he walks.

At the beginning, his pace is hunched and limping, displaying his submission to violence, which makes the viewer more satisfied to see his broken yet beautiful soul turning the past pain of his existence into art: he lets music guide his moves as a way to tell the world he's a new man by cutting most of the sick, evil roots that harmed him, that he's invincible, that no one can stop him. Watching this cathartic display of euphoria was the most iconic scene in the film, following his speech at the TV and the inevitable meltdown that caused Murray's death.

Going to further appreciation, even his clown make up is beautiful. Why? Simple. The combination of colours, shapes and the intimidating glare just embellishes even more the character.

The dark blue triangles in his expressive eyes makes the light green colour to highlight, specially in dark backgrounds, giving the impression he's piercing your soul whenever he stares directly at the camera. Same can be said about the red smile and emerald green hair. They boost an already intimidating look.

The cold and warm colours paint a picture of a man full of intense emotions, mirroring it in a simple yet masterful artistic way.

Another interesting point is the way Joker dresses. Usually we had almost every single live adaption of this character in purple coat, hat, etc. But this particular version is not following any comic, which gives more freedom to creativity and once again, out of the standards of what we could have expected.

Red is a colour related to passion, action, love, strength, motivation and excitement. As for yellow, it indicates freshness, happiness and enlightenment and finally, green. Green is renewal, growth and regeneration. Colours that represent a new stage in his life, a mirthful chapter at last. We finally get to see our battered, always humiliated protagonist (or hero) descending into madness, but finally free from his repressed man who held his soul captive like a bird to fly away, to never come back. An insanity that despite being his downfall, turned out to be his ticket to freedom as he walks to the light in Arkham Asylum dancing at the end.

Ladies and gentlemen: behold the film nobody asked... But the film we fucking deserved.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

❤️💚💛

[blackheart-skz]

Ateez as Yanderes.

TW: Mentions of abusive behaviour, toxic relationships, violence, self-harm and other topics that might be triggering.

Note: I am, in no way, trying to romanticize or portray the persons involved as heroes. The behaviour of the characters is not healthy and extremely harmful. If you or someone you know sees such characteristics in someone, do not overlook it. Furthermore, this is a work of fiction. I am not trying to represent the idols through my writing.

Ahhh I'm actually not very good at doing reactions. I feel that for some of the members I did a sort of a mini scenario but then for others it's like a description oof. Hope it's not super bad.

Kim Hongjoong = Over-proctective

- Hongjoong's caring and protective personality was what made you like him and now the same personality makes you despise him

- Hongjoong does not trust you at all

- He thinks you're incapable of doing things without him

- He treats you like a porcelain doll that could easily break

- He has put a lot of restrictions on where you can go or what you can do

- He will not let you go anywhere without his permission or go somewhere without him

- He doesn't trust you with anyone

- People are evil and they could hurt his precious one

- He is very afraid of something bad happening to you

- If you even get a minor cut, he will freak out and will not even let you move

- You do not have the freedom to do anything

- If you ever say that you want to leave him, he will lock you up

- He thinks that you're not mentally strong enough to know what's good for you

- And that's what drives him become your guardian and imprison you in your own house

Park Seonghwa = Dominant/Narcissistic

- Seonghwa has a huge ego

- Rejection is one thing he never accepts

- He expects everyone to worship him and you're no exception

- You wouldn't have been forcibly taken away and chained in his basement had you not uttered the word "no" to his face

- If you do anything that he even feels was disrespectful or if you try to leave him, he will severely punish you

- He sees inflicting pain and other severe punishment methods a way to mold you into his perfect slave

- You have to be really careful to not displease him cuz his anger is unpredictable

- He will reward you if you're obedient at all times

- He also makes sure he is the only person you invest your time and effort in

- He is your master and your life should revolve around him and him only

Jeong Yunho = Jealous/Overly-sensitive

- Yunho started off as the best man ever but then as time passed, the good in him started fading away.

- He started getting jealous a bit too often

- And now it's a daily occurence

- He does not trust you one bit

- He downloaded a tracking app on your phone so that he can keep track of where you go

- You talking to any guy or girl makes him go absolutely nuts

- he threatens people behind your back

- He also twists your words a lot which is rooted from his lack of trust as well

- He thinks that everything you say has a hidden implication behind it

- Like seonghwa, he wants your life to be about him

- He doesn't like you giving attention to anyone else be it a person or a hobby

- So if you want to talk to your mom or write a bunch of poems as a hobby, too bad.

Kang Yeosang = Sadistic/Cruel

- Yeosang was very good at hiding his sadistic side when he first met you.

- He used his charming looks and soothing voice to make you fall in love with him

- Once that happened and you entered into a relationship with him, his true colours started showing

- He slowly started getting both physically and emotionally abusive

- His initial reason was to keep you with him but eventually he started enjoying it

- As much as he loves you, seeing you helpless and at his mercy pleasures him to no end

- He prefers using physical punishments over emotional anytime you disobey him

- He loves seeing you break piece by piece

- But he also likes peppering you with kisses and telling you how gorgeous you are

- which makes him even more scarier

- Trying to leave him is not a smart idea at all

- You try to run away and he breaks your legs

- He will never hesitate to use excruciatingly painful methods to keep you from leaving

Choi San = Manipulative

- Just like Yunho, at first, he treated you like a king/queen

- But then slowly he started becoming a bit too obsessive and wanted to be with you 24/7 and know everything that you did

- He wants to know every single detail of your life

- If you ever try to reject him, he starts guilt tripping you

- He says that you're ungrateful for all the things that he does for you

- Afterall, he did treat you like no one else in the beginning

- Your family and friends slowly start cutting ties from you

- You don't know why but San knows very well

- If you find him being too burdensome and call out his behaviour, he blames it on you instead

- He targets your weaknesses to justify his behaviour and make you feel guilty

- No matter what, he never admits that he's wrong

- If you try to blame him, he starts playing victim

- He makes himself seem so pitiful that you can't help but feel guilty

- If you ever try to leave him, he would threaten to kill himself

- He will make you feel like you're the bad one in the relationship

- And you'll not have anyone to go to either so it's a win for him

Song Mingi = The clingy/stalker type

- Mingi was absolutely mesmerized by your beauty when he saw you for the first time

- He wanted to talk to you but he didn't have the courage to so he just start following you around and keeping track of every move you made

- He found out everything about you from what school you went to to what your pet peeve was before he made a move

- It took him a year worth of courage to eventually talk to you and of course considering how much he knew about you, he also knew what he had to do in order to make you fall for him

- And it worked

- Once that happened, Mingi stuck to you like gum

- Now, he does not leave your side for even a minute

- He wants to be with you 24/7 and sends you over a 100 texts everyday

- If you try to leave him for even a second he'll throw a tantrum and cling on to you to you like a koala

- Has become too dependent on you and you would actually believe him if he says that he would die without you

- coming back to him biting his nails to the point that his fingers were bloody and him literally jumping on you when after you left him alone for not even 3 hours is enough proof for you to believe him

- He has never and never will hurt you but he wont hesitate to hurt others

- He hasn't yet but he surely will if you don't take his threats seriously

Jung Wooyoung = Delusional

- A very dangerous yandere

- but more than that a pitiful yandere

- He isn't able interpret your words or read your emotions

- He mistook your gesture of kindness as an invitation for love

- After helping him once, you started seeing him around a bit too often

- He started talking to you as if you guys were close friends

- You ignored him but he never stopped

- After a while, he started treating you like his girlfriend/boyfriend though you barely knew him

- At that point you realized that this wasn't normal and you needed to do something

- You told you friends and were planning to contact the police

- Wooyoung started noticing how people looked at him weirdly and he thougjt its cuz they were jealous of your "relationship" and want you guys to break up

- You had come to the final decision to report him but before you could, he kidnaped you and locked you up in his house claiming that he's trying to "protect" your relationship

- The more you try to push him away, the closer got

- Be it physically or emotionally

- None of your attempts to snap him out of his imaginary work

- His imagination is too far gone for him to come back

Choi Jongho = The selfish/violent type

- A bit of what you would call a spoiled brat

- A lot actually

- What he wants, he gets

- Even if that means hurting others in the process

- He's a selfish man and he isn't scared to acknowledge that

- Kinda like Seonghwa but not quite

-Unlike him, Jongho is aware of what he's doing

- Seonghwa's ego leads him but Jongho leads his ego

- Jongho doesnt hesitate to get violent either

- You disobey him, he punishes you

- But the fact that he remains calm both before the punishment and after shows that he isn't actually bothered by your behaviour

- He just likes the power he has over you

- To him it doesn't matter if you love him or not, you're something that he admires therefore he has to have you

- No matter what you do, his heart will never go soft and even if it does, it will only be to an extent where he let's you breathe freely

[nehilistuniverse]

I am sooooo PMSing because of what all things my mind is saying. It literally wants to crawl back to the creep and pretend like nothing happened ;_; why is my instinct always to forgive? I am not because ;-; He must have read stuff I had written just to spook him out in case he ever tried to do that but I do not know why when I finally got a confirmation it actually hurts. Then it also means he did have access to my insta account which I also kind of knew but I was hoping that was not the case ;-; but when he had quoted the song and something else I just knew this SOB crossed his lines. The way he freaked out and had started to play games. I always knew but I was Wishing that he would have not done that and the fact I had forgotten about what I had implanted that ish. I just feel so defeated because I thought he had been freaked out because of what he had pulled and that I didn't call him out. I might have done something very stupid just to mess around with him just in case he ever did that ;-; but I didn't think he actually will. What a piece of trash. I actually want him to find me here for once I want him to know how I feel without him getting a chance to justify himself. He fucked up big time. He was messing around with me. He knew I would get jealous. My bitch ass left the other dude also because he was trying to make me jealous and make me confess. I would rather run away because just because I like you doesn't mean I trust you and I am up for something. I like a lot of people. I don't care I am not up for something like the whole playing house house when I can't even have a little reassurance from the person that they like me and that they will actually do so much for me because my bitch will be giving up my freedom in a way and fighting my urge to be single and every other emotion for a person. If you are selfish then we are never going to happen. I have always wanted someone who could ask me out, respect my boundaries, gets to know me as a person, befriends me and takes things slow. I am not up for something quick or into something where the dude won't see me as their one, is a hoe or anything. For a moment there I had thought maybe I would try to settle but the way I got hurt and got pitted against other women like you didn't pull off what you had and then disappeared on me. How was a supposed to react to that? I thought could be friends but nope started flirting so I tried to kind of manipulate my friend into asking you how you feel. I had not told her to ask you out on my behalf I wasn't that into you. You had just started flirting again and I didn't understand where do we actually stand? I am not ever going for a non romantic hoe. Ever. Who has bad habits that will cause issues in the long run. Who knows what kind of psychotic person you are? I am always skeptical and you pretend to be innocent that I always knew. I just want to know for how long has this breech of privacy been going on? That was my only goal. I wouldn't have minded the anything much had you not done what you have. Loathsome scumbag. I hate the fact I feelings for such an asshole. I always fall for creeps. I swear to god. The fact you know the things you know and victim blame. Bitch you called me too free and that I overthink things. I wish you cared but you sure as fuck are some kind of narcissist. The scary kind for sure. One toxic fucker.