#Bruce isn’t the only one relieved when Leslie comes back

[anonyunknownonearth]

pls read my tags <3

i need Dr. House to be Batman's temporary doctor for a month while Dr. Leslie Tompkins is recovering from some sort of rogue activity.

[butwhyduh]

Bruce's "please don't make me a grandfather" jdbfndnfjfjf

He definitely worries about one of them getting someone pregnant. Especially when Roy ends up a dad, Bruce starts sweating and looking at his boys.

Oh god, Dick is prime have a kid age. Bruce starts researching Tamarean biology because can he even get Kori pregnant? Can she get him pregnant?? Wait, this isn’t the Alien movies. They almost get married and Bruce starts to relax. It won’t matter if they are married and happy. But they don’t. Then Dick starts dating Barbara and Bruce gets new grey hair. Commissioner Gordon starts shaking his hand at galas so hard that if he wasn’t Batman, he would cry. Bruce had the please wear protection, here’s a massive case of condoms, I will have them delivered monthly with no questions asked, conversation that scars both him and Dick.

Then Jason he starts to worry when he comes back to life because that little 15 year old that blushed every time Donna looked his way was definitely not getting laid. But Bruce doesn’t worry much because the only thing Jason is fucking is vengeance. Then he meets the outlaws and Jason is definitely eyeing Artemis and Bruce tries to start the talk way too late and Jason shuts him down with a growled “I already fucking know.” Then he meets the second team and Bruce has a midlife crisis because it’s Roy and Kori and they are definitely all fucking. Bruce went to college, he’s seen this shit before. And he has to worry about a second son getting the same tamarean princess pregnant and he feels bad but he also worries about Roy’s drug past and potential disease transmission.

Bruce now had monthly sexual protection of all kinds delivered that he probably has only a little less than a pharmacy and the delivery guys joke he’s running a brothel. Jason regularly steals boxes to give to the working girls and guys and folks.

Then Tim. He gave off mad virgin vibes before announcing to Bruce that his girlfriend was pregnant mid workout and Bruce almost drops a free weight on his face. Tim explains that it isn’t his and that isn’t any better. Are kids having open relationships nowadays?? Then Tim explains everything that he’s still a virgin but definitely knows how birth control and condoms work. And later Bruce feels bad but he’s actually sorta relieved that Tim has a boyfriend because he can’t get pregnant but Bruce worries about a Kryptonian partner. What if he breaks Tim?

Then with Cassandra and Duke and Damian he is close to a heart attack, especially with Damian talking about his fathers “carnal desires” that Bruce hires Dr Leslie to give them a thorough talk. At the end Cass raises her hand and asks what if they were gay and all three listen intently about gay safe sex. And now he’s worried about 6 people having unplanned pregnancies or STDs but also wondering if most are gay but that’s cool as long as they are safe and he buys even more protection including stuff tailored to lbgtqia people.

But yes, Bruce, despite being an atheist, prays that he doesn’t become a grandfather until his kids are in stable long term relationships and thirty. And maybe a little bit that maybe they could be a little gay because then pregnancy is off the table.

[sohotthateveryonedied]

No Matter What

Read here on AO3!!

Summary: 

Bruce figures out that his son isn't straight from an early age.

That doesn't make him love him any less.

- Eight Years Old -

Bruce is finally starting to get a hang of this parenting thing.

The first few months were rough, there’s no disputing that. Bruce lost track of how many times he panicked and called Leslie Thompkins whenever Dick burst into tears over something and Alfred wasn’t home. Not to mention all the times when Alfred would leave Bruce on his own for dinner, insisting that one must learn how to raise a child without a butler to help. Bruce fed the kid burnt chicken nuggets and garlic bread for two nights straight. Now, though? Bruce is immensely proud of how far he and Dick have come. He’s even taken to attending PTA meetings, if only for the free coffee and doughnuts. He hears the front door open right on time, then wet boots hitting the floor. Dick had a half day today to make room for meet-the-teacher night later. Bruce isn’t looking forward to spending two hours sitting in a chair made for eight-year-olds, listening to a teacher in plastic pearls talk about an elementary schooler’s oh-so challenging curriculum. At least he’s only got the one; he has no intention of having more kids after Dick. Bruce busies himself with his mostly unburnt slice of toast, one ear trained on the footsteps through the foyer accompanied by unceasing chatter that Bruce has grown quite fond of over the months. “—and then they let us outside for recess even though it was raining, and I went on the swings and my hair got all wet and it was so cool.” “That explains the muddy clothes,” Alfred says. “Sorry, Alf. I’m not immune to mud puddles.” “It would appear so, Master Dick.”

The two of them enter the kitchen, Dick working his elbows out of his yellow rain slicker to reveal the school uniform beneath. His cheeks are rosy, his eyes bright. “Hiya, Bruce!”

“Hey, champ. How was school?” “It was awesome. It was raining all day and at recess there were a ton of puddles all over the playground and a million worms. I didn’t touch them though, ‘cause the teacher said not to.” “What snack would you like, Master Dick?” Alfred asks, taking Dick’s discarded raincoat and folding it over his arm. “Can you do ants on a log?” “Coming right up, sir.” Dick heaves himself up on the bar stool beside Bruce, his sock feet kicking against the lower cupboard. Bruce spreads marmalade over his toast. “Tell me more about school. Any fights today?” “Nope,” Dick says proudly, flashing his gapped teeth. Dick and another boy got into a scuffle on the first day over a comment about whether Dick’s parents being from the circus meant they were part monkey. It’s a miracle Dick only gave the kid a nosebleed and didn’t break anything. The principal let Dick off with a warning since it was his first time at a normal school, but Bruce has a feeling the only reason he wasn’t expelled was because his guardian is the most powerful man in Gotham City. Bruce had a stern talk with Dick when they got home about the importance of controlling one’s actions. Traveling the world in a circus train car doesn’t do much to help one’s impulse control. He also banned Dick from watching television for the rest of the night, but Dick’s crocodile tears swayed him to balance it out by letting him have ice cream before dinner. That’s good parenting, right? “I even made a friend,” Dick says. “Oh? What are they like?” “His name is Caleb and his desk is right next to mine, so we talked during reading time. Then he gave me some of his chocolate during lunch and we played on the swings together at recess.” “Ah, the wonders of childhood friendship,” Alfred says from where he’s slicing up a celery stalk at the other end of the counter. He sounds relieved, and Bruce finds himself matching it. Dick has been at Gotham Elementary for almost a week and hasn’t made a single friend until now. Bruce can’t tell if that is more because of Dick’s circus background or because he is a tan-skinned boy with the barest of Romani accents attending a predominantly white private school. Sometimes (all the time) Bruce loathes being associated with Gotham’s high society. If you’re not white, straight, and rich, you are automatically shunned in their minds. “He sounds great, Dick.” “Yeah! And he’s got really pretty eyes too. I can’t tell if they’re brown or green, but they’re sparkly like glitter.” Bruce arches an eyebrow. “You must like him a lot.” He takes a bite of his toast, making eye contact with Alfred over the boy’s head. Alfred doesn’t react but for a twitch of his mustache. Dick nods, focus switched over to the plate Alfred slides in front of him. Dick takes a celery stick and picks off the first raisin coated in peanut butter, licking it off his thumb. “I hope he talks to me again tomorrow. Alfred, can I bring an extra snack to lunch tomorrow so I can share it with him?” Alfred smiles. “Of course. I will pack a second cupcake in your lunchbox tomorrow morning just for him.” “Thanks, Alf.” Dick goes right back to eating his ants on a log, cheerful as ever, completely unaware of the swarm of question marks buzzing around in Bruce’s head. Huh. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Eleven Years Old - Bruce gets home from a three-hour business meeting, his sandpapery eyes aching to close and stay shut for...let’s go with ten years? That should be enough. He loosens his tie and prepares to go upstairs to his bedroom where he’ll spend the next decade of his life hibernating, until he sees his ward on the living room sofa. Dick is lying on his stomach with his face buried in a throw pillow, as if he’s waiting for the sofa to swallow him whole. Must have been a bad day if he’s not sliding down banisters and flipping over chairs like usual. Sighing, Bruce goes over. “Dick? You alive over there?” “Mmph.” At least he’s conscious. Bruce sits on the arm of the couch, shaking Dick’s thin shoulder. “Come on, kiddo. Use your words.” “Mmph.” “Bad day, then?” Dick nods. “Do you want to tell me what happened?” Dick shakes his head. Bruce sits back with a frown. “Alfred?” he calls. Alfred pokes his head in. “Yes, Master Bruce?” Bruce gestures to their anguished preteen. “It would seem that our lad had a rough day at school. He wouldn’t tell me what, but I’m making his favorite casserole for dinner. Hopefully that will perk him up.” Bruce turns back to Dick, who hasn’t moved. “C’mon, Dickie. Sit up so I can see your face.” Reluctantly, Dick forces himself upright with one last groan into his pillow. His hair is mussed, standing up on one side. There’s a pillow crease on his cheek. He sits back against the sofa, miserable. “Better.” Bruce prods Dick’s ribs which earns him a giggle, goading the kid into sliding over a few inches so Bruce can sit beside him. Dick leans into his side immediately and Bruce puts his arm around him. “Now, tell me what’s got you down.” “I want to transfer schools.” “How come?” As far as he’s known until now, Dick has loved middle school. His childhood took a bad turn when his parents’ ropes snapped, but preteen life is at a good start. Until now. Dick’s gaze is trained on his sneakers, kicking them where they hang over the edge of the couch. “Some kids in my science class were talking crap about me.” “Don’t say crap.” “Can I go to a new school? Please?” “What did those kids say about you?” Dick picks at a dime-size hole in his jeans. “They called me gay,” he says quietly. Bruce tightens his arm around the boy, his heart panging. Of course someone had to bully Bruce’s kid. As if his life hasn’t already been hard enough without stupid teenagers making it worse. “I wasn’t even doing anything wrong. I was just talking to my lab partner, and the guys at the next table over started whispering about us. Then they started throwing papers.” “Did you tell the teacher?” “No. But I know she noticed. Everyone did. She just didn’t do anything about it.” That sets Bruce’s blood to a boil. Teachers have a responsibility to protect their students, no matter what. What gives her the right to turn a blind eye to bullying, just because a couple of students might not fit the agreed-upon standards of “perfect” upper class society? “I’ll set up an appointment with the principal,” Bruce decides. Dick’s eyes get wide. “Bruce, no. Please. It’s fine, really. I don’t want this to turn into a big deal.” “What did you do when it happened?” Dick shrugs. “Nothing. My lab partner stopped talking to me, so I just asked to go to the bathroom and didn’t come back until the bell rang.” Bruce sighs. Middle schoolers are the worst, every last one of them. (Except for Dick, of course; he is perfect.) “I’m sorry, sweetheart. Kids can be cruel—especially at your age, when they start learning new words that they don’t understand the way they should. They think some words are insults or something to be ashamed of when they’re not. Most kids grow out of this. Too many don’t.” “People suck,” Dick mutters. “I don’t even know why they were saying all that stuff. I’m not...I’m not like that” Bruce bites his cheek. He’s going to have to be careful about this. “Dick, do you know what being gay means?” “Duh. It’s when two guys date each other. I’m not stupid.” “I know you’re not stupid. But gay can mean a lot of things. Men can like other men, just as women can love other women. Like Kate, for instance. Then there are bisexual and pansexual people who love all genders, and asexuals who don’t like either.” Thank god Bruce thought ahead and read some LGBTQ+ research books all those years ago when he first began to suspect that Dick wasn’t heterosexual. “And transgender is when someone doesn’t identify with the gender they were assigned at birth. Sometimes people feel more like a man, a woman, neither, or both.” “...Okay?” “I just want to make sure you understand these things, because part of being a respectful person means respecting others for who they are. And if you don’t completely understand the label they identify as, then it’s your job to try and understand it the best you can.” “Why?” “Because too many people in this world judge others for things they can’t control, and that’s not right. No one should have to feel like they were born wrong. And I want to make sure you know this, that way you can be better than those who choose to hurt others for things they can’t control.” “Does that mean the guys who made fun of me are bad people?” “I’m sure they aren’t. They might just be confused because they don’t understand that being gay isn’t anything bad or dirty. The people in this part of Gotham...they don’t accept a lot of things. They think that being queer or a person of color means you don’t deserve respect, and that’s wrong. It was wrong of those kids to tease you and your lab partner the way they did.” Dick nods slowly. “I’m not gay.” “I know. I just want you to be aware of these things. And if you ever have questions or need to talk, you can always come to me.” He ruffles Dick’s hair. “Even when other people are nasty, remember that I love you no matter what, got it?” Dick shoves Bruce’s hand away and smoothes his hair back out, grinning. “Yeah, yeah. I got it.” ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Thirteen Years Old -

What’s the difference between a growth spurt and a shark? 

Dick doesn’t have any sharks. “We’re home!” Dick announces. He and Alfred stumble into the house, their arms filled with all kinds of shopping bags. With Dick shooting up half an inch nightly these days, he’s growing out of his clothes at a rate even Bane would gawk at. Bruce and Alfred can barely keep up with the kid. “Want to see what I got?” “Show me, pal.” Bruce sets aside his tablet and pushes his reading glasses up on his head. (He does not have poor vision, thank you very much. Leslie just made him get a prescription as a precaution, that’s all. He’s still young by anyone’s standards, just ask Selina.) Dick starts pulling clothing out of the boutique bags, showing off every one of his new sweaters and pairs of Alfred-approved jeans. After ten minutes that Bruce desperately tries to look interested during, Dick pulls out what looks like a t-shirt that’s been sliced in half horizontally. The fabric is bright pink with a chibi whale on the front. “This one is my favorite,” Dicks says. His grin is blinding. Bruce stares for a long moment, his brain a lagging computer drive. “What is it?” “It’s a crop top. You know, like a belly shirt?” Memories from Dick’s Kim Possible phase flash in front of Bruce’s eyes. “Alfred let you buy that?” “Yeah?” Dick’s smile flags. He lowers the crop top, suddenly self-conscious. “Do you not...like it?” “You were supposed to get winter clothes, Dick. For cold weather.” “So?” “That’s clearly something you’re supposed to wear during the summer.” Dick pouts. “But I like it.” He holds it up against himself, twisting this way and that like an amateur model. “Sorry, kiddo. You’re not leaving the house in that until springtime.” “Oh, so Robin can wear tiny shorts in the winter, but Dick Grayson can’t wear a harmless crop top? I smell hypocrisy.” “Yes, because Robin has thermal leggings and a built-in heater in his uniform.” He looks back at the pink monstrosity, at Dick’s pleading eyes. “I would be open to negotiations if you’re willing to wear a sweater under it.” “That’s not how fashion works, B.” “I don’t care. You can wait until it gets warmer out to wear it.” “You’re such a drag,” Dick whines. He lifts his dozens of shopping bags and goes to leave, then turns right back around. “What if I wear a jacket over it and promise to keep it closed whenever I’m outside?” Bruce considers that. “Fine. But not below fifteen degrees, got it? And if I see you outside for even five seconds without the jacket, I’m confiscating the Xbox. Deal?” “Deal.” ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Fourteen Years Old -

Something is different about Dick today. You’d think his boots were made of helium with the way he floats through patrol, and then smiles into his late-night milkshake like it did his homework for him. Bruce sits beside his Robin on the roof of Wayne Tower, silent for as long as he can bear before he can’t hold it back any longer. “Did anything interesting happen today?” “Huh?” Dick looks up as if Bruce pried him and his thoughts apart with a crowbar. “You’ve been...different. Happy.” “Am I not usually happy?” “No, you are. Just seems like you’re...extra happy, for whatever reason.” A blush dusts the kid’s cheeks. He sips his chocolate shake and shrugs. “Dunno. It was just a good day. Nothing special.” Yeah, and Bruce is a goddamn unicorn. Still, he knows better than to pry where Dick doesn’t want him. It’s a delicate thing. “If you say so.” “I got a hundred on my English essay,” Dick offers. It’s a start. “Was that the one on Grapes of Wrath?” “That was last month. We’re on Animal Farm now. It’s not my favorite.” “Yeah, I wasn’t a fan of Orwell either. Shakespeare was okay, but I preferred his tragedies over his comedies.” “Of course you did.” That makes Bruce laugh. He’s not worried; the two of them are high enough that no one can hear it. Bruce even has his cowl down, his face exposed to the cool air. “They had quinoa burgers at the cafeteria today.” “Mm-hm.” Dick is dodging something, beating around whatever bush he wants to talk about. Bruce can be patient while he figures it out. “And I spent some time with Barbara after school.” “Oh?” “Yeah. We walked home together and we took this old path through the park. Then we kissed.” Bruce chokes on his milkshake. He coughs, his sinuses burning and eyes watering. When he recovers, he says, “That’s...that’s great, chum.” “Yeah.” Dick can’t stop smiling, a true schoolboy in love. “And she asked if I wanted to patrol with her tomorrow night, but I said I needed to check in with you first.” “I don’t see why not.” It’s not like Bruce hasn’t patrolled without Dick before. Sure, he misses the company on the few days a week he’s alone, but he’s not about to deny Dick the thing he clearly wants. “You sure? You look...freaked out.” “No, no. That’s...great, that you kissed. Congratulations.” Awkward. He’s so fucking awkward. Stop being awkward right now. He doesn’t know why this is messing with his head so drastically. Bruce has listened to Dick moon over girls for the entirety of his pubescence, talking about them like they’re goddesses he’s forbidden to look upon, Barbara included. And Bruce has seen the way Dick and Barbara interact with each other in between muggings, always talking with their heads bent close like they’re the only two people in the world. Who would have thought Batman could be a third wheel? “I’ve liked her for a while now, but I didn’t know if she liked me back and I was too nervous to ask.” Dick’s face goes even pinker. “Kissing her was cool.” Part of Bruce’s brain jumps at the realization that, holy shit, Dick just had his first kiss, my little boy is growing up, what a milestone. The other part is far less happy about this new development. Yes, Bruce has seen Dick win brawls with men three times his size. He can fly the Bat-jet on his own, knows six languages, and is even leading his own superhero team. And yet, all Bruce can think is, no, not my little boy, he’s just a baby, Batgirl is corrupting his innocence and She Must Be Stopped. With great effort, Bruce holds it all back. He’s read the parenting books, he knows that it’s important to be supportive when they’re at this age. “Good to hear. I’m happy for you.” He pats Dick on the shoulder. “Thanks, B.” ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Sixteen Years Old - “Hey, Bruce? Can I talk to you?” Bruce doesn’t look up from the metal flakes he’s testing. “What is it?” “I can come back later if you’re busy.” “No, I’m just analyzing some samples. I’m looking for residue from one of Zsasz’s blades.” Dick steps forward, tentative for once. “Need any help?” “I would like for you to come out with whatever it is you clearly need to tell me.” Dick snorts quietly. “Nice phrasing.” “What?” “I think I’m bisexual.” Bruce turns around, forgetting about the samples entirely. Dick’s arms are crossed over his chest, his eyes skipping between everything that isn’t Bruce’s face. At sixteen years old he’s finally tall enough that he doesn’t have to crane his neck to look at Bruce anymore. “You...think?” “I am. I’m bisexual.” “Okay.” “Is that cool with you?” The question shocks Bruce. “Of course it is.” Did Dick honestly think this would change anything? Has Bruce done something wrong, made Dick think that he wasn’t loved unconditionally? Dick squints, appraises Bruce’s reaction. “You knew, didn’t you.” “No.” “Bruce.” “I knew a little bit.” Dick rolls his eyes. The tension slips from his shoulders. His arms uncross. “Of course you did.” “Well, you weren’t exactly subtle about it.” “What the hell does that mean?” “Language,” Bruce chides, more out of habit than anything. “And do you realize how often you would come home after elementary school complaining about stupid pretty boys?” “That was just me being dramatic.” “I’m not disputing that. But they were still crushes, pal.” “I figured you thought it was just a phase.” Bruce shrugs. “Maybe for the first few days. But trust me, I have known you liked boys since you were a kid.” “Then why didn’t you just say so? It took me years to figure this all out, and you’re telling me you’ve been sitting on this info the whole time?” “Because this is your truth, not mine. I knew that you would tell me about it when you were ready. And you have.” Dick is clearly fighting a smile. He bites his lip instead, runs a hand through his mop of black hair that not even Alfred can wheedle him into combing anymore. “Well, I’m heading to the tower for the night, so don’t wait up, ‘kay? Kay. Good talk.” He goes to leave, but Bruce stops him. “Hang on. Why choose now to tell me?” Dick stuffs his hands in his pockets—an obvious tell. “No reason. I just...wanted you to know. Just in case.” “In case of what?” “Oh, you know.” Dick waves his hand in a gesture that clarifies absolutely nothing. “Life happens. People meet each other. You know how it is.” Bruce’s soul implodes. “You have a date?” “I never said that.” “You implied it.” “Real detectives rely on evidence, not theories.” Dick winks. “Tell me who it is. Are they a civilian? A hero? Do they come from a respectable family?” If it’s Roy Harper, Bruce might have to bury a body tonight. Especially after learning about Harper’s drug problem. Dick is too pure for someone like that. Or—heaven forbid—that Wally West kid. Dick is already walking away. “See ya, Bruce!” “You come back here, Richard John Grayson! Do I know him? Does he know your father is Batman?” Dick’s cackle echoes around the cave. “It had better not be a speedster!”

[daringyounggrayson]

too lost and hurting to carry my load

Whumptober Prompt 3: Delirium 

(AO3)

There’s a hand on his shoulder, shaking him into consciousness. “Dick?”

Dick lifts his head off of the floor and blinks himself awake only to find Bruce crouched down next to him, eyebrows pinched in concern. “I fell asleep?”

“Yes.”

He rubs at his eye and sits up, keeping the blanket pulled tight around his shoulders. “What time is it?” The fire is still going and a few pages of his textbook are crinkled where his face had used them as an impromptu pillow. At least there’s no drool on it.

“Eight.”

Dick angles his mouth into his elbow and gives a few rough coughs, causing pain to spread through his chest. When he looks back up, Bruce is frowning.

“Are you going to be up for patrol tonight?”

No. He wants to go back to sleep, preferably under fifty or so blankets. “I think I’ll sit this one out if you think you can make it without me for one night.” Dick flashes a smile and starts picking up his study materials. “Besides, I have that History test on Friday; I should probably get some more studying in.”

“Hnn.” Bruce presses the back of his hand to Dick’s forehead. Dick sighs theatrically at him but doesn’t move. “Have you taken anything?”

“No.”

“You have a fever.”

“I know.” He hadn’t, actually. He knew he was sick—had been for the past few days. It had been pretty mild up until today when he woke up freezing, exhausted, and trapped in molasses. A fever, as it turns out, was the cause.

Dick stacks all of his stuff together and stands, ignoring the rush of dizziness the action sends to his head. Bruce follows suit, watching him suspiciously.

“Medicine, then bed,” Bruce decides. He reaches for Dick’s shoulder to guide him out of the living room, but Dick shrugs it off.

“I can do it myself. I’m not a kid,” Dick huffs, all too aware that the blanket cape isn’t helping his case in the slightest. Nevertheless, Dick makes his way out of the living room before Bruce can grab him again and force meds down his throat or, worse, get Alfred involved.

“I’ll check on you when I get back. You would be wise to be asleep before then.”

Dick rolls his eyes, calls, “Whatever you say, Brucester,” and continues up the stairs to his room. He kicks the door closed and drops his stuff on the desk, not caring at all when one of the pencils rolls off the pile and onto the floor. He climbs into bed without changing his clothes or removing his blanket cape. He falls asleep in seconds.

oOo

When Bruce gets back from patrol, he’s poking Dick awake and forcing a thermometer into his mouth.

“101.9,” Bruce says when it beeps.

“Does that mean I can stay home tomorrow?” Dick asks, voice half gone. He knows that even without a fever on his side, Bruce would let him stay home if he asked. Partly because Bruce has a surprisingly hard time saying no to Dick about these things (Alfred says it’s because “Master Bruce had a rather difficult time with school-related activities while he was young.”), and partly because Dick so rarely blatantly asks to stay home.

“Hn. We might have to call Leslie if this gets much higher,” Bruce tells him.

Dick rolls his eyes. “It’s fine, B. I just need some Tylenol or whatever.”

“Which I believe I told you to take before you went to sleep.”

Dick just glares at him and Bruce sighs.

“Change. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Bruce leaves and Dick changes into pajamas, forcing himself to stay upright until Bruce finally returns with water and pills. After he swallows them, Bruce tucks him back in and turns off the alarm on his nightstand.

“I have a meeting at eleven,” Bruce starts, “but I can be home for the rest of the day.”

“I’ll be fine.” Dick’s eyes are already closed. “Probably just sleep all day.”

And he does. Alfred wakes him up to eat and then he sleeps some more, although he moves from his bed to the couch during the day. He watches a mix of reality TV and cartoons from at least ten years ago and curls up in a spot Alfred thinks it too close to the fire. He rapidly starts feeling worse and the fever gets higher, and Dick swears the medicine has stopped working altogether. But mostly, he tries to sleep.

oOo

Dick’s head shoots up in alarm when he hears the door creak open. He had nearly fallen asleep again (maybe he had) and now he’s lost his place. It doesn’t matter, though; none of it is sticking anyway.

Bruce steps into the room and Dick goes back to scowling at his notes, something he’d been doing for the past forty minutes after waking up in a panic—remnants from another intangible nightmare that screamed failure failure failure—and remembering all about the test he hadn’t studied for since Bruce sent him to bed several nights ago. But he had time; he could still get a few hours of cramming in, ace the test, and then pass out for the rest of the weekend. He had a plan. Bruce trained him to always have a plan.

“Kiddo, you should be in bed. It’s nearly four in the morning.” Bruce sounds tired, but something tells Dick that the tiredness isn’t from the patrol he just got back from. He crosses the doorway to lean over him. “What are you working on?”

“Studying,” Dick replies. “I have a test.”

“I really doubt you’ll be able to go to school tomorrow,” Bruce tells him gently.

Dick snaps his head up to look at him. “But I need to,” he explains earnestly. “If my grades slip, you’re gonna bench me. That’s the rule.” It’s always been the rule, and Dick’s grades have never slipped. Never.

Bruce takes the pencil from him. “I think we can make an exception, all things considered.”

Dick just frowns and shakes his head. “But I have a test, I can’t miss it, I can’t.” Bruce is always looking for a reason to bench him, and he knows what it’s all been building up to, too: firing him (getting rid of him). He can’t let that happen, he won’t. Not over a stupid test he knows he can pass.

“Enough,” Bruce says. It’s something he says when he’s finished with Dick and whatever Dick has brought up, but he doesn’t sound harsh. It's still that weird sympathetic, gentle tone, like he doesn’t think Dick can handle a simple argument at this point (weak, worthless).

“No, no, no," Dick pleads, sweaty hands in his hair. "I can do it. I can keep up��I promise! Please, just let me show you. Please." I'm good enough, let me be good enough.

Bruce's face falls. "Sweetheart, of course you’re good enough. You’re perfect.” Dick swallows, realizing he must have said that last part out loud. “This has nothing to do with that."

"Then what is it? Why are you trying to fire me?" It’s panic. That’s what this feeling is, heart racing and chest tight.

"I—" Bruce stammers for a second. His face shifts—Enough—and Dick knows the discussion is over. He won’t talk about it; he’ll never tell Dick where he messed up, and then he can mark that as another one of Dick’s failures. "I think the fever is making you delirious. Let’s get you back to sleep, huh? Maybe another dose of medicine."

Dick doesn’t know what to do. He settles for clenching his jaw and staring into the middle distance. He feels dizzy and sick and he wants it to be over. He can’t think like this, he can’t breathe. He can’t, he can’t, he can’t—

Bruce pulls him against his chest then, shirt soaking up Dick’s hot tears. “I’m not going to fire you, understand? But I can’t let you go out as Robin unless you prove to me that you are capable of taking care of yourself. Right now, that means resting and recovering. Robin needs to be at his best to watch Batman’s back, right?”

Dick presses his forehead into Bruce’s shoulder and coughs and coughs and coughs, each one sending a shard of glass into his lungs. “Bruce,” he whines when it eases up. Bruce rubs his hand up and down his spine, hushing him and grounding him to the here and now. “Don’t feel good.”

“I know, chum." He presses a hand against Dick's forehead and then again on his cheek. "Christ, you're burning up. Let’s have Alfred come up here and check you out, yeah?”

“Okay, okay.”

oOo

Alfred examines Dick while Bruce sits close to him on the bed. They’re talking like Dick isn’t even there, but he can’t bring himself to care. He wants to be taken care of right now.

The high fever (104.8) and the low pulse ox reading (92%) make Bruce worry and he brings up hospitals, but Alfred reasons that, “There’s nothing they will do that we can’t do here, and making Master Dick sit in an emergency room for hours will only make him more uncomfortable than he already is.” Normally, Dick might be relieved to hear that, but he doesn’t really care what happens to him as long as someone is doing something to fix it.

After listening to his lungs, Alfred finally diagnoses it as pneumonia. Bacterial, most likely, but they’re going to run a sputum culture to be sure and start him on antibiotics in the meantime. Alfred grabs some from the cave’s medical stash along with an icepack to try to get the fever down.

He falls asleep with Bruce and Alfred by his side. The fever is still high and they don’t want to leave him alone in case his pulse ox drops lower and he ends up needing oxygen. Later, Dick will recognize these as the excuses they are, but for now, he’s afraid to be left alone too.

He spends most of the next few days lying on the couch in front of a fireplace, head in Bruce’s lap and Alfred close by. They give him medicine and pet his hair and promise that he’ll feel better soon. Dick knows they’re right, he does—Bruce hasn’t brought up hospitals since that night and Alfred has stopped forcing icepacks on him; the coughing is even starting to ease up ever so slightly—but he’s completely consumed by how shitty he’s still feeling, and part of him worries that he’s never going to get better. Not completely, anyway.

Bruce’s fingers tangle in his hair again and Dick hums in contentment. “Try to get some more sleep, chum.”

“Okay.” Dick closes his eyes and tries to ignore his fever-induced fears. “Okay.”

[camsthisky]

Ok ok I know that the post was angsty romance cliches but I’m having a WHOLE EMOTION RN so I would like to submit a prompt in which Dick is mind controlled/something to that effect and forced to fight Damian and Damian refuses to fight him and is seriously injured as a result, and then Dick comes to and ohmygosh the hurt/comfort potential here is incredible

ao3 | ff.net

They don’t really know how Nightwing was caught, only that he must havebeen put under some kind of mind control before they released him back intoGotham. Nightwing had headed straight for Red Hood, and Jason hates everythingat the moment, because right now he’s blow for blow with his brother, andneither of them are really holding back.

“Shit,” Jason grits out, barely dodging a flying kick aimed at histemple. He gives as good as he’s got, but Dick’s been at this for almost aslong as Bruce has, and when he’s going at Jason with murderous intent—Jason’skind of floundering here. “Where the fuck are you guys?At this rate I’m gonna end up killing him.”

Which isn’t his goal, but Jason’s also not sure how to deal with Dicklike this. There’s no way to get close enough by himself so he can restrainhim. All he can do is fight.

“Forty seconds out,” Tim’s voice says in his helmet. “Batmanhas been delayed, so it’s just the three of us until Orphan can get here.”

“Two, three, I don’tcare,” Jason snarls, catching Dick’s fist and twisting. “Better than justme.”

Forty seconds ticks by too slowly, and Jason takes a solid punch to hisshoulder just as Tim falls from the rooftops and surprises Dick with a hardenough kick to send him sliding backwards with a cough.

“You okay?” Tim asks Jason, even though he’s not facing him. He’s gothis bo staff out in front of him, ready to attack again, even though Dick’sstill picking himself up.

Damian touches down silently next to them, oddly quiet.

“Fine,” Jason grunts. “Shoulder’ll be sore tomorrow, though. He’snot holding back.”

“Do we know what happened yet?” Tim asks.

Jason shrugs. “Hell if I know. Came at me like a bat out of hellbarely a minute after B warned us all Nightwing’d been whammied.”

“So what do we do now?” Damian speaks for the first time sincearriving. 

He looks off kilter. Uncertain. Like the thirteen year old boy he is. Itmakes Jason’s stomach churn, because Damian is the biggestbrat, but Dick can always manage to do the impossible, like turn the loudest,proudest, angriest assassin into a boy worried about his brother.

Dick seems to do that to all of them. It pisses Jason off.

“Restrain him,” Jason says. “Or knock him out. Anything to stophim. He’s not gonna go down easy, but it should relieve the pressure to havemore—shit.”

Jason ducks just in time to duck under Dick’s swing. He pushes forwardand throws an elbow into his older brother’s stomach, but Dick’s alreadystepping back, away from the blow. Even mind-controlled, he’s an amazingfighter.

Tim steps in from behind, and Damian just a second after him, but Dickperforms some crazy maneuver using the wall, and he’s flipping over all threeof their heads. Jason’s on him the moment he lands.

It goes like that for a while. Jason, Tim, and Damian’s goal is to stopDick, but keep him alive. Dick’s coming at them with full strength, aiming tokill. It makes it just this side of harder to keep him down.Finally, Jason’s had enough. He whips out his gun, doesn’t give Tim time to domore than scream, “No!” before he shoots at Dick’s legs.

Dick, of course, avoids it.

“The hell are you doing?” Timhisses.

“If we don’t go at him with everything we’ve got, he’s going to winthis, baby bird,” Jason snaps. “If he wins, we’re all dead. I’m not justgonna stand here and let him kick my ass.”

“You’ll hurt him!” Damian yells.

“Better hurt than a mind-controlled zombie trying to kill us,” Jasonsays, and he shoots again.

Dick dodges, though, and invades Jason’s personal space. Too close touse the gun, so Jason goes for a pistol whip, but Dick’s ahead of him there,too. They wrestle over the gun for a moment, and while Jason’s bigger andstronger than Dick, the acrobat uses the wall to flip over and twist the gunfrom Jason’s hands.

Then it’s Jason getting pistol whipped. It hurts like abitch.

“Red Hood!” Jasonhears Tim yell, but it’s hard to hear him. It sounds more like Jason’sunderwater than in an alley in the middle of Gotham.

He loses a chunk of time. Maybe a minute, he thinks. But when he looksup, Tim and Damian aren’t fighting anymore. Jason’s still on his feet, but he’dended up staggering into a wall. Tim is frozen, staff still at the ready, butmoving no closer than the five feet away from Dick he still is.

It’s a second later that Jason realizes why.

Dick has the gun aimed at Damian’s head.

Shit.

But Dick hasn’t pulled the trigger yet. Something’s wrong. Or maybesomething’s a little bit right. Dick, who’d been perfectly fine while Jason hadbeen fighting him besides the whole mind-control thing, is staring at Damianwith a scrunched up expression. There’s sweat collecting at Dick’s temple,obviously not from the fight, and Dick’s just standing there.

“Hey there, Dickie,” Jason calls softly, and the hand holding the guntrembles once. Jason’s right. Dick’s shaking it off. “Hey, Dickiebird.Look at me a second.”

Dick doesn’t move, but his eyes flit to meet Jason’s. Just a splitsecond before they’re back on Damian. Damian’s frozen, too. He looks—scared.Jason doesn’t focus on him.

“Whatever’s wrong with you, we can help,” Jason continues. “I knowyou don’t want to do any of this.”

“I—” Dick cuts off with a choked breath. He doesn’t speak again, butthere’s some awareness coming back to his eyes. They don’t look as glassy. He’scoming around.

“All you have to do is let go of the gun,” Jason says. “It’sprobably gonna be hard, but you’re Dick fucking Grayson. The golden boyhimself. Besides, if you don’t let go of the gun, you’re probably going to hurtsomeone, and I don’t think you want that.”

Dick swallows, but the trembling in his hand grows stronger, and Jasonrealizes that Dick is trying to force his fingers to relax. He’s trying to dropthe gun. But then his grip tightens, and Jason stiffens. Damian swallows.

But, of course, Dick’s not done. Instead of dropping the gun, Dick yellsout—maybe in frustration, maybe in anger. Jason’s not going to pretend to know—and throws thegun. At Jason.

Jason barely catches it. He doesn’t move beyond that, too entranced inwatching Tim finally move forward, pulling Damian back at the same time. Timflips over Dick’s head, and escrima sticks clash against bo staff. Dick’smoment of clarity is over.

But. But. It’s enough. Dick’sstill fucking fighting in his own head.

“Orphan,” Jason growls. “How close are you?”

“Five more minutes,” Cass saysquietly. “No more. No less.”

Damn. Jason’s not sure they havefive minutes.

“Stay here,” Jason orders Damian, who still looks sort of shell-shocked,and he charges in as Tim’s getting thrown back, bruise blooming on his face andpotential concussion be damned. After a few seconds of grappling, he manages tograb both of Dick’s hands in his, and he slams his head forward. The helmet resoundsagainst Dick’s forehead, and just as Jason lets go of his hands, Dick’sstumbling back.

He’s blinking, though. The glazed look in his eyes fading a bit again.

“Wha—?” Dick says. He’s trembling again, this time with his whole body. “Where—?”

Jason doesn’t waste any time. Instead, he grabs Dick while he’s confusedand starts to disarm him. Tim’s by his side soon, and the escrima sticks arebeing thrust away from Dick’s hands, and the suit’s defense mechanisms arebeing disabled.

Dick doesn’t really fight them anymore. He’s panting, eyes unfocused ashe tries to fight whatever is messing his head up.

“Fuck,” Dick is murmuring, and Jason’s sure if Dick had his hands freefrom Jason’s grip, that he’d be cradling his head. He looks like hell. “Fuck, fuck.I’m gonna be sick. I’m—”

Dick cuts himself off, breathing stuttering to a stop. Then his eyesroll up into his head, and he straight up drops.

Jason barely catches him.

“Call Batman!” Jason yells, just as Dick goes rigid, his whole bodyarching out of Jason’s arms. Jason struggles to keep his brother’s body immobile,and it’s only then he realizes how beat up Dick really is. There are bruises onhis neck and face, tears in the light Kevlar, and Dick’s arm—the one that hadheld the gun—is being held at the wrong angle.

Meaning, Dick had put up a hell of a fight before whoever had caught himwhammied him. Plus, all the injuries Tim, Damian, and Jason had given him.

“He’s on his way,” Tim says.

Jason grunts in acknowledgement. “Help me hold him down. Both of you.”

Dick’s clearly fighting some internal battle, and it takes all three of themto keep him from injuring himself further. Tim has to stop Dick from clawing athis face and eyes, and Damian has to hold down Dick’s legs, while Jason justkeeps Dick in his lap and prays that Batman gets here sooner rather than later,because this is one of the scariest things Jason’s experienced in his life.

And he’s died before.

But while this doesn’t exactly take the cake, Jason’s just at a loss asto what to do. All they can do is to wait until Bruce gets here with a car, sothey can take Dick back to the Cave and get him treated. Some major JusticeLeague treatment, if it’s too much for Leslie and Alfred.

The scariest part is when Dick goes limp.

“He’s breathing,” Tim whispers, mask lenses wide and hand on Dick’schest. “He’s still alive.”

Orphan drops down just as the Batmobile screeches to a halt in front ofthem.

Jason has only wanted Bruce more once in his life.

“Status,” Bruce barks the moment he’s out of the car, and he takes Dickfrom Jason’s tight grip as Tim explains. Jason sits on the ground and just letsBruce take away his older brother. Lets him whisk Nightwing into the car, andit’s only when Cass nudges him lightly that Jason finally makes himself move.

It’s going to be a long night, and Jason’s already ready to drop.

“Coming?” Cass wonders.

Jason swallows, stares at the car, and says, “Yeah. I’m coming.”

Dick somehow turns out okay.

Jason and his siblings spend the night in the Watchtower while Batgirlwatches over Gotham. Jason knows that Bruce will be back in the city the momenthe hears about trouble, but for now, Dick is the priority. Specifically,getting whatever is in Dick’s head controlling him, out.

It’s not easy. It takes the efforts of several Leaguers, but theyeventually give Dick the all clear.

He doesn’t wake up, though. Apparently, he’s exhausted from trying tofight the mind control. He sleeps through Tim’s crying, through Jason and Bruce’sfight, through his arm getting splinted, through Wally and Roy’s brief visit,through the transport home.

Jason’s about up to his earsin frustration, but he diligently sits by Dick’s bedside with Damian as Brucetypes away on the computer about some case. The case he’d been working on whileDick had been fighting his brothers.

“When is he going to wake up?” Damian asks quietly, catching Jason’sattention.

“Dunno,” Jason says, staring at Dick’s sleeping face. “Could probably beanother couple hours, if J’onn and Bruce are right.”

“What if—” Damian falters, and starts again, softer, more nervous, “Whatif Richard does not wake up?”

The typing behind them stops. Jason doesn’t let himself think about it.

“Well, since the Justice League gave him the all clear, he’s probablyfine,” Jason says, stamping down his own rising fear. “Dick’s probably justbeing overdramatic again.”

“Fuck you,” Dick croaks, his eyes blinking open. They’re still a littlefoggy, but he looks more coherent than he has all night.

Damian and Jason both jump to their feet, and there’s footsteps frombeyond the infirmary, signaling that Bruce is coming over, too. Tim would behere, too, if he hadn’t fallen asleep at the table again. Alfred had put hisfoot down, and Tim had gone to bed.

“Welcome to land of the living, Dickie,” Jason greets with a lazy grin. “Also,why the hell are you cursing me out?”

“I am the perfect amount of dramatic,” Dick whines, because he’s literallyfive years old. “Also, I feel like I’ve been run over with the Batmobile abouttwelve times, so you are obligated as my little brother to be nice to me.”

“Fat chance,” Jason snorts.

Damian ignores Jason, but what else is new. “You’re alright, Richard?”the kid asks, and again, he looks too young.

Dick gives Damian a reassuring smile, along with a weak laugh. “I’mokay, Dami. Little scrambled, but a good night’s sleep should fix me right up.”

Jason refrains from telling Dick that he’d already gotten a night’s sleep. Maybe it wasn’t good, but it was still longerthan Jason thinks any of them have ever slept while not sick.

“Good to see you awake, chum,” comes Bruce’s warm voice from behindJason. Dick’s gaze meets Bruce’s as he steps up next to Jason, and Jason canliterally see the way Dick relaxes. “Alfred will be down with food soon.”

Dick’s eyelids flutter as he sighs. “Wake me up when he gets here. I’mgonna take a nap.”

Jason blows out a large breath. “Geez, Dick. You literally just woke up.”

But Dick’s already out, breathing even. He looks a lot more peaceful thanbefore, though, so Jason doesn’t push the issue. Instead, he just plops backdown into his abandoned chair. Bruce stays, too, sitting on the side oppositeof Damian and Jason.

“He will be okay?” Damian asks again.

Jason stares at Dick’s face and realizes that he can’t answer. He couldlie, but he doesn’t know the answer. Doesn’t know the effects this wholeincident will bring short and long term. Doesn’t know how Dick’s mental statewill end up. Whether he’ll be able to work through it on his own if it turnsout he’s super messed up over it.

But Bruce saves him.

“He’ll be okay,” Bruce reassures them. There’s no smile on his face, butthe way he’s looking at both of them is probably the closest thing to a lovingsmile that they’re going to get. “If he needs help, we’ll help him. But,eventually, he’ll be okay.”

“Yeah,” Jason says without really thinking. “What he said.”

Damian finally relents and sits back down in his chair. The three ofthem sit at Dick’s bedside for a long time, waiting for Dick to wake up again.

Because Bruce is right. Whether Dick’s okay at first or not, they’re allgoing to be here to help him if he needs it.

Surprisingly, even Jason.

[thefuriousstarlightstudent]

Best Friends

So I’ve got another fic. This one is pretty much pure angst and has a few different warnings. So without further ado, here are the warnings:

Horror of the psychological variety. Some description of injuries. Panic Attacks/Metal Breakdowns, brainwashing, and death. Some allusions to depression, but those are lighter. Also swearing.

Onto the story! Link is also up here because this is a long one!

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17595908

Then

2015

The terror, pure, unfiltered, terror hit him almost as soon as he fires the gun.

Daddy's not gonna like that, a voice says gleefully, snickering the whole time. Mommy's isn't either. You've been a bad boy. Better get ready to be PuNiShEd!

Then the flag hits Daddy's back and goes through his chest, piercing his heart. The voice in his head goes silent for the first time in days and he feels a giggle bubble up in his throat and escapes.

"That's not funny…"

Then Daddy stops laughing and falls to the ground, twitching. He continues to stare in sick fascination until the blood slowly staining the floor is a huge puddle instead of just a few drops. He grins even wider until his mouth starts to hurt. He looks at Batman and giggles again. He drops the gun dangling from his fingers. A blood-wrenching cackle bursts out of his mouth, dark and dangerous and gleeful. He's free. Daddy's gone - Dead as a doornail, the voice sings - and Mommy's nowhere in sight.

He hardly notices someone grabbing his shoulders and holding him as he collapses to the ground, still laughing. He's crying too, but that doesn't matter as much. He's safe. He's safe. Daddy's gone for good and now he can just laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and-

"Tim, snap out of it," a voice begs brokenly. He looks up and through the tears streaming down his face, he sees a girl with red hair wearing a cowl. He's sure he knows her from before, but he's not allowed to think about before. Before is for good boys. He's not a good boy. Daddy and Mommy both say so. They punished him a lot, he thinks giggling out loud. "Please, Tim, please."

He doesn't like being called Tim. Tim is from before and thinking about before is bad and it means he'll be punished and he doesn't want to be punished he wants to be a good boy for Daddy and Mommy and he doesn't want to be punished anymore and he can't be called Tim because he's Junior, not Tim. He's a good boy. Not a bad boy. He listens but Daddy's dead and Mommy's gone so maybe it's okay to think about before but thinking about before brought pain so maybe he shouldn't.

He can't decide so he just laughs. And laughs more. And more. More. More. More. More! More! More! More! More! And laughs more! Laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing!

He just keeps laughing and crying and crying and laughing and laughing and crying and crying and laughing until something pricks his neck and his vision slides into darkness.

When they first arrive, Barabara still has hope. She and Bruce both think finding the Joker and Harley Quinn doesn't have anything to do with Tim being missing. That neither of them is involved in the newest Robin's disappearance. That's why they don't call Dick. They have him continue working with M'gann and Conner looking into the Light, who they suspect is responsible for taking Tim.

She wishes it had been the Light.

Because Tim is like a little brother to her. He doesn't deserve this. He hasn't even been Robin for two months. And now a whole month of that has been spent with the Joker.

At first, neither she nor Bruce understands what they've walked into. It's supposed to just be another mission to catch the Joker. Then there's that reel of film the Joker has rolling. It doesn't even show everything, she thinks, feeling sick. Just some electroshock 'therapy' as the Joker says and the result, Tim, huddles in the corner of the room, no longer strapped to the table and mumbling answers to every question the Joker asks.

Then the Joker appears from behind the screen followed by Harley, both going off in a monologue about children and adoption. Then they call for 'Junior' and Tim appears. He's smiling unnaturally wide and his eyes are glazed. He trots right over to Harley, giving her a stilted hug. She responds by patting his head.

When she first sees him she almost throws up. Tim is so pale he's almost white. He's always been a paler kid, but not like this. Not white. His hair is green and she can't see his roots in it at all.

The fight after that is over simultaneously quicker than she can blink but also takes a lifetime. It ends with Harley gone and the Joker dead on the floor. Tim kills him.

Then he laughs. And he doesn't stop. Not until she makes him.

"God, Bruce," Barbara says, pulling her cowl down and looking at him. "God. That… that monster!"

"I know, Barbara," Bruce whispers, staring at the Joker's body. He's not looking at her or Tim, who's knocked out in her lap thanks to some quick thinking. At the rate he'd been going he probably would have kept laughing until he died. "I know."

"Tim is thirteen. He's thirteen and that sick fucker did this to him," she growls. "I need, God, we need to get him home, B. He needs help. The Joker bleached his skin."

And it is bleach, she can tell now, being this close. God, Tim's skin is going to be burned all over. He has burn scars on his forehead from the shock's the Joker kept doing to him who knows how many times. At least, she finds herself thinking, he'd left Tim's mouth alone. She's seen what he's done to people when they don't 'smile' big enough for him. She doesn't want Tim to have to deal with that too.

"Get Tim home, Barbara. Tell Alfred you're on your way. Call Leslie and Dick. Get them there too. No one else."

"What about you?" she asks.

Bruce finally turns to look at her. He looks… sad. Defeated.

"Someone's got to make sure no one finds the body, don't they?"

When they arrive at the Batcave, Tim is just starting to stir. He's not laughing, so that's good, at least in Barbara's head. He sits up in the backseat as she parks, rubbing his eyes blearily and looking confused.

Barbara takes a deep breath, preparing herself, and turns around. She pulls her cowl down and smiles gently at him. Tim merely looks at her, slightly perturbed. There's no sign of recognition anywhere. At least he doesn't seem scared of her.

"How are you feeling?" she asks. She hopes her smile isn't coming off as a grimace.

Tim, for his part, almost seems to be… curious. He tilts his head, considering. He doesn't answer her.

"Alfred is here and Dick is on his way," she forges on. "So is Dr. Thompkins. She's going to take a look at you. Make sure you're okay. Do you want to… how about we get you into some better clothes."

Tim looks down at his clothes then and frowns slightly as if just noticing the sick replica of the Joker's own wardrobe he's wearing. He looks back up at her, brow furrowed. Then he nods, just barely and very jerky, but it's still a nod.

"Okay," Barbara gasps, relieved beyond words that at least he understands her, even if he seems unwilling to talk. God, if the Joker were still alive she'd kill him herself.

She opens the door and hops out of the driver's seat, then she opens the back door, grabbing Tim by the hand and gently tugging him after her. He follows silently, letting her bring him towards the showers.

"Here we are," she says cheerily, all false. Alfred isn't down here yet, probably still getting a hold of Dick. So it's up to her to get Tim cleaned up. "I'm going to get the shower started. Why don't you sit there," she adds, gesturing to a plastic chair kept by the showers. She's not actually sure why it's kept there, to be honest. She's just glad it is.

Tim listens, walking over there and sitting down. He plays with his fingers, interlocking them and releasing them over and over again. His green hair falls in front of his face, blocking her view of his face. She watches him a few moments longer before turning the shower on, waiting for the water to warm up.

It doesn't take long before it's plenty warm. She shakes her hand out and tosses her gloves to the side of the room. Tim is still sitting there. Still playing with his fingers. God, he's thirteen. Thirteen! The Joker isn't just a monster. He can't even be called human. He took Jason away from them, blew him up. And now he's broken Tim's mind. Tim, who's the smartest, kindest, most amazing person she's ever known.

"Come here," she says softly, tapping Tim on the shoulder. His head snaps up, fixing her with a curious stare. She gestures for him to stand up. "I'm going to get you some new clothes. You take off these ones and shower, okay? There's a towel for when you're done over there," she says, pointing to the stack on a shelf. "I'll be right outside the room. If you need me just call, okay? Or make noise."

Tim nods again, this time it's less jerky that when she'd asked him if he wanted to take a shower. She takes that as a positive. She probably should make sure he showers alright, but after what he's been through he deserves a few moments to himself. He deserves to have his privacy.

They keep warm sweatpants and sweaters in the Batcave's locker room that fit everyone as a precaution. She never knew what they could possibly be used for before tonight.

She waits outside the showers, listening to the water run and leaning the back of her head against the wall. After a few minutes, the water turns off. Tim emerges, wrapped in a towel. His hair is still green, but at least his skin isn't as pale. He'd been bleached, but it looks like it was only his face and arms. The rest has washed off and revealed his normal skin tone. Even his face isn't as pale as it had been. That, at least, is a relief. Not as much damage as she'd first thought.

"Here are the clothes," she says, setting them down on the ground. "I'll turn around while you get dressed."

She does just that, listening to the slight rustling sounds of him getting dressed. A few moments later the noises stop. She waits until she's sure he's dressed and turns around.

The sweatpants and sweater dwarf him, despite being his size. He's lost a lot of weight under the Joker's 'care'. His face is gaunt and his fingers are too bony. He looks like a lost little kid. He looks confused like he doesn't quite understand what's going on around him. That almost hurts more than anything else. Tim is sharp as a tack. He's not one who should be this confused, not ever.

"Let's go and sit down in the medical bay," she says. Tim grabs her hand. Barbara's eyes shoot to him, but he's hiding behind his hair again, which is falling into his face, dripping slightly. She squeezes his had, which seems to comfort him because Tim leans against her. "This way."

They arrive, and it's only once they're there that she realizes maybe being here isn't a good idea. Tim immediately starts to hyperventilate, looking at her with big, scared eyes.

"It's okay," she tries. Tim just pulls away from her, hugging himself around the middle and shaking like a leaf. "Here, look. It's fine. I'll sit here with you." She hops onto the hospital bed, patting beside here. "I'm safe and you'll be too. I promise, Tim."

This, finally, seems to work. He stops, moving closer to her timidly. His eyes are darting around him, but he finally sits down carefully next to her.

"See, it's safe," she chirps. "I'll stay here the whole time, Tim."

He leans against her again at that, humming slightly, the first time she's heard him make noise since she knocked him out. The first noise she's heard him make in about a month that isn't bad. Isn't a sign of how much the Joker messed him up.

"Oh my," a voice says quietly from behind her. Tim spins around, tense and scared. Barbara looks slower, placing a hand on Tim's shoulder to let him know he's safe. Let him know Alfred won't hurt him.

"It's okay, Tim. It's just Alfred. He's safe," she whispers to Tim.

"Master Tim," Alfred says softly. "How is he, Miss Barbara?"

Barbara smiles sadly at him. "He's tough. He'll get better, eventually. I'll tell you later. Did you call Dick and tell him we found Tim?"

"Yes, I did. He's on his way now," Alfred replies.

"Okay, okay," Barbara says, stroking Tim's hair until he finally relaxes and leans against her again. "When he gets here, make sure he doesn't just come running down here. I want Leslie to look at him first."

"Of course," Alfred says, then looks around. "And where is Master Bruce?"

"He's… he's taking care of a body." Barbara doesn't meet Alfred's eyes. "I'll explain later. But we can't have anyone finding it."

Alfred raises an eyebrow. "It will be explained to me."

"It will," she promises. "Just not here. Not where he can hear."

"Of course. I will go and wait for Dr. Thompkins to arrive. We don't want to overwhelm Master Tim."

"No, no we don't" she agrees, glancing down at Tim. He's closed his eyes, but he's obviously still awake. This is probably the first time he's felt safe since he went missing. God, how messed up is that?

Alfred leaves.

"I'm so sorry it took us so long to find you, Tim. I swear we were looking, even if that monster said we weren't." Barbara sighs. "We missed you, Tim. I really missed you. I'm sorry this even happened to you."

And Tim, he looks up at her and for the first time since he's been here his eyes are clearer, filled with tears and wavering, but clear.

"Mi-mi-mi-missed y-y-you-ou to-o-oo," he manages before closing his eyes, breathing deeply.

Barbara feels tears fill her eyes too and squeezes them shut, pulling Tim close and hugging him tightly resting her head on top of his.

After everything, once Bruce is back and Dick's here and Leslie's checked Tim out and chewed Bruce up, Tim is asleep peacefully. They have a long list of what to do, including calling Black Canary over as a therapist. It isn't like they can just use a normal one, especially in Gotham.

"The Joker, Bruce!" Dick snaps, quiet enough so that Tim doesn't stir. "The Joker had him! You're lucky he's alive."

"You think I don't know that, Dick?" Bruce snaps back.

"Dick, let it go. We can all yell at each other later," Barbara says tiredly, rubbing her forehead with her fingers. "Bruce, just stop getting mad too. We need to focus on Tim."

And that means a lot. Skin treatment to repair the damage the bleach had done. A cocktail of anti-infection medication to make sure nothing gets infected. Trying to figure out what the hell the Joker had done to Tim's hair because it's growing in green at the roots too. It's not just dyed. Making sure he has no permanent brain damage from being electrocuted. Therapy. This isn't a quick fix.

"Tim's going to need a lot of love. And he doesn't need to hear you two trying to kill each other!"

"I'll get to work on something for the Joker Venom in his system," Bruce offers, which is the closest thing they'll get to him admitting he'll listen.

"I'll let Conner and M'gann know we found Robin," Dick adds.

"No details," Bruce says. "Tim wouldn't want them to know. If he wants to share he can, but only when he wants to."

"Agreed," Barbara says. "You don't have to lie to them, just don't tell them what happened to him."

Dick nods. "Okay."

Barbara looks over at Tim again. He looks peaceful, almost like the same kid he'd been a month ago. But he's not. His hair is green and his face is white and he has electrocution scars on his forehead. He can't even talk, not really. He started laughing, earlier. When Leslie was checking him out. The Joker Venom is really messing with him. But he's still Tim. He's still their Tim.

"But… how do we know the Joker won't do something like this again?" Dick asks. "That he won't come back for Tim? He knows who we are, you said."

"He won't," Bruce says grimly. "The Joker is dead."

It's quiet for a moment. Dick's face goes through a large range of emotions but eventually settles on shock. And disbelief.

"Bruce, you didn't…"

"Tim killed the Joker, Dick," Barbara says, looking him in the eyes. "The Joker told him to kill Bruce and he shot the Joker."

"God," Dick breaths. "Oh my God." He's looking at Tim now. "Timmy…"

"He'll get better, Dick. Tim is strong." Barbara smiles crookedly, glancing at Dick.

"I know he will," Dick says fondly. "But Tim didn't deserve this."

"No one did, Dick," Bruce says. "And that's why we're going to help him."

"And no more Robin," Dick says. "This has been twice now, Bruce. He's going to die. I can't deal with another little brother being killed."

"No more Robin," Bruce agrees.

"Good luck with that," Barbara whispers, looking over at Tim, quiet enough that neither of them hears her.

After a week Tim is already improving in leaps and bounds. The bleach burns on his skin are healing, but his skin is healing pale, almost as pale as it was from the bleaching. Bruce suspects Joker had something that made it permanent in the bleach. It's the same with the hair. It's been growing in green, not Tim's normal black. Barbara hopes it'll stop, but for how crazy the Joker was, he was a genius.

Tim's been talking again. He doesn't say much. They suspect because of the trauma. Talking meant getting punished. And even though he knows logically that won't happen, it's a lot to get over.

He hasn't laughed since, and that's probably good, to be honest. Bruce has been trying, but he hasn't been able to get all the Joker Venom out of Tim's bloodstream. None of them know what will happen if he starts laughing. None of them know if he'll be able to stop.

He seems to know what happens when he laughs and he doesn't try to anymore. He doesn't smile either, but that's okay for now. As long as he gets better, Barbara doesn't care what it takes.

Leslie is coming every day. She has other patients, yeah, but she also cares about Tim a lot. Bruce had offered to get a doctor from the Justice League. She'd turned him down. Told him that Tim was her responsibility.

The only other person who knows what happened, fully, is Dinah Drake. Bruce calls her right away, sets it up for her to come over every day for the foreseeable future. She's Tim's therapist.

It helps, Barbara can tell. He's still healing, but he's getting better. His violent outburst sopped completely after the first few days. He's more like Tim again, just quieter. Sadder. He carries a weight with him, one he didn't before.

Tim gets better. It takes weeks, months, really, but he gets better. He can tell he's still damaged, scarred. He's not an idiot. He's not going to pretend that he doesn't have nightmares. That he doesn't hate himself for what happened.

(He can't bring himself to regret killing the Joker though. He doesn't think he'll ever regret that.)

He hates his stupid skin and he hates his hair. He hates the Joker for doing this to him, marking him as a victim forever. Tim takes to wearing turtlenecks and sweaters that make it hard to tell he has such a large difference in skin tone. He dyes his hair monthly to keep it black, to keep the green from showing. He practices meditation. Black Canary, Dinah, comes over once a week for him to talk to.

The point is Tim's better, maybe not as good as before, but better. And he wants to be Robin again. Bruce and Dick are firm. They refuse. But Tim isn't going to let that stop him. Why should he? It didn't before when Bruce said no.

He prepares for weeks, hacking a backdoor into the zeta beam and adding himself in, making sure no one catches it. He keeps up on his training behind locked doors. He steals his spare uniform out of a locker.

H waits until Bruce is at the weekly Watchtower meeting for the Justice League and Dick and Barbara are on a date. He goes to Mount Justice.

People must hear him the zeta beam power up because when he gets there he sees Superboy, Miss Martian, Beast Boy, and Aqualad waiting. Staring. At him.

"Hi," he says quietly, raising his hand in greeting. "I'm Robin."

"I am aware," Aqualad says sternly. "I was told by Nightwing you were not joining the Team for the foreseeable future."

It's a question hidden in a statement. Tim shrugs. He doesn't smirk or smile. It's still dangerous for him to with the Joker Venom Bruce hasn't been able to get out of him fully. Probably won't ever be able to free Tim from.

"Plans changed. I got sick of waiting around. I figure may as well not give anyone a choice."

"I like you," Beast Boy declares. "You seem cool. Want to hang out?"

"Sure?" Tim says.

He's never really hung out. Heck, he hasn't been to school or near anyone his age in months. He's not going to be allowed back in school until Bruce is sure his 'violent outbursts' are finished with. It's hard though. The anger sneaks up on Tim when he's not paying attention, biding its time until he's so full of it he may burst.

Sometimes he can feel them coming, but it just feels better to yell and scream and kick things and throw things. Dinah says that it's not a symptom of the Joker Venom. She tells Bruce it's normal for children who've been exposed to stressful situations to be prone to bursts of anger.

Doesn't help him if it's normal or not though. Tim's well trained. That makes him a lot more dangerous than any normal kid would be during bursts of anger like his.

He follows Beast Boy, smiling. There's no way Bruce will be able to keep him from Robin.

"What were you thinking?" Bruce asks. He's calm, calmer than he usually is when he's mad. Granted he had to act calm in front of the Team when he caught Tim and dragged him back to the Batcave.

"I was thinking I'm ready. I'm not some kid, Bruce! You can't keep me from this. It won't work. We both know I'm too smart."

"So you weren't thinking. Tim, you're-"

"Dangerous," Tim spits, tearing his mask off and throwing it to the floor. "I know. I'm a danger. I'm violent. I'm angry. I'm a killer." His voice breaks on the last word. He's ashamed to notice that angry tears are spilling out of his eyes.

"Tim, I don't want you to get hurt," Bruce whispers, almost too quiet for Tim to hear.

"I won't, Bruce," Tim says, also quietly. He's facing away from Bruce. He can't show weakness. "The Joker is dead. I killed him. Harley is in the wind. And unless I suffer another mental breakdown I should be okay. We both know most of the Team can take me down if need be."

"Please, don't do this," Bruce begs. And it is begging, Tim can tell.

"I think I have to," Tim says, turning around a furrowing his brow. "I need to help people. I just… Bruce, you know what I mean. You wouldn't be able to just stop, would you? It's like that. Every moment I'm here instead of helping people I just bottle up all of this energy and I feel like I'm always bouncing my leg waiting for you. Hell, you don't even let me in the Batcave without supervision!"

"Fine, Tim! Fine!" Bruce says, somehow throwing a massive amount of energy into those three words without even raising his voice. "Fine. You can join the Team. Nightwing will bring you next training day. But not Gotham, not yet. Not until you've shown me you can handle it."

"As long as I can run comms here while you're out," Tim negotiates.

Bruce cracks a smile. "If I'm out later than 1 am you go to sleep and trade off with Alfred."

"If that's what it takes," Tim says, holding his hand out.

Bruce grabs it and gives it a firm shake, sealing the deal.

Now

2017

"Intel was off," Cassie's voice says across the comms. "We've got Harley Quinn with Poison Ivy. Better get them both."

Tim feels himself freeze.

"Robin, you work with Blue and take down Harley. Kid Flash and I will handle Ivy," Cassie continues.

"You got it," Jamie says from next to Tim. It rings through the comms a second later. "Robin and I will handle her."

"Just wait until Wonder Girl and I lure Ivy away," Bart says. "Better that we don't have to deal with them working together. You know how much that'd suck."

"Affirmative," Jamie says. He turns to look at Tim and flips his comm off. At least the part that lets them hear what he's saying. "You okay, esé? You're kind of pale."

That is almost enough to make Tim want to laugh. But no, he wasn't okay. He couldn't just tell anyone that though. He'd just have to deal with this one his own and hope Harley didn't say or do anything.

"I'm fine," Tim manages, giving Jamie what probably isn't a very comforting look. "I'll be fine," he amends. "I just don't like dealing with Harley."

"At least it's been a few years since the Joker popped up," Jamie offers.

Tim turns away.

"Yeah," he manages. "At least."

From there it all goes according to plan, mostly, that is. Except for the end. When Harley manages to see him in the shadows. He'd been able to land hits on her without her seeing him while she was looking at Jamie. That didn't work forever, apparently.

"Birdie?" she asks, cheery and pleasantly shocked. "I'm glad to see ya! I see those scars Mr. J gave you healed! Too bad about the hair though; I've always been fond of green."

"I haven't," Tim snaps. She blocks a series of kicks, flipping away and dodging Jamie's blast.

"I've missed Mr. J since he died," she goes on fondly. "You were a bad boy, killing him, Junior."

Tim freezes. Harley takes advantage of that and goes after him. Tim is only saved by Jamie finally hitting her with his sonics and knocking her out against a tree. Another attack pins her.

"Robin, you alright!" Jamie exclaims, grabbing Tim by the shoulders when he's finished. "What happened there?"

"N-nothing," Tim stammers. "I'm fine."

"You froze, hermano," Jamie says. "What was she talking about? Calling you Junior and green hair? Scars? Killing the Joker?!"

"It's not important," Tim tries, shaking his head furiously. "Please, Jamie, let it go."

"What's going on?" he asks. "Tim, tell me. It's okay."

Vaguely Tim realizes he's shaking all over. His eyes are tearing up. He collapses like a puppet with his strings cut. He feels Jamie wrap his arms around him in a hug.

"We're back!" Bart cheers suddenly, appearing next to them. "Poison Ivy is neutra-"

He falls silent, no-doubt at the sight of Tim sobbing and Jamie hugging him tightly. Tim hardly hears Jamie tell Bart to get Cassie. Even more vaguely he hears Cassie arrive.

"Tim, you're okay," she says. "Just please, please tell us what's wrong. Please, Tim."

He should be telling them no names in the field. He should be okay, shrugging all this off. He should be a million other things, but he's not. He's scared and alone and thirteen again, trapped with the Joker and Harley, being tortured and electrocuted and terrified.

He doesn't even know what he's doing when he starts laughing and sobbing. All he knows is he can't stop and he's not sure he wants to. God, he's so scared and lonely.

"Tim!" he hears someone exclaim distantly. He can't bring himself to care. He just laughs and he knows he shouldn't be laughing but he can't help himself. Nothing's okay and he doesn't know if it even has been since he was thirteen and innocent. Since before he was Robin. He doesn't really think anything ever will be okay again.

Then the world goes dark.

When Tim wakes up he's alone in one of the medical bays on the Watchtower. Okay, not alone, he amends, seeing Bart, Cassie, Jamie, and Dinah waiting for him. Bart is asleep. Cassie's face is buried in her hands. Jamie's on his phone. Dinah is looking over what must be his chart.

"Hey," he croaks. Wow, his throat is sore. What happene-

Oh.

That's what happened.

"Tim!" Cassie exclaims. "You're awake."

"Tim!" Bart shouts, jerking awake.

Jamie levels him with a look.

"Good to see you're okay, Tim," Dinah says gently. "They refused to leave until they knew you were okay."

"And what happened," Jamie says.

"Yeah!" Bart cheers. "No way we're leaving you alone until we know what's going on."

Tim starts to shake his head.

"Tim, you really scared us, you know," Cassie says.

And Tim knows his secret isn't going to be a secret from his best friends (and girlfriend) any longer.

"I'll tell you," he whispers, looking at the ceiling. "Promise. Just, tomorrow, okay? You can come to my house."

They all share a look before nodding.

"Now shoo," Dinah says fondly. "I need to talk to Tim."

His sessions are upped to twice a week. They'd been down to twice a month before all this. He goes home a few hours later. Alfred makes him spend the day in bed, sleeping. Dick probably hasn't even heard about it. Not that Tim expects him to have. Dick's been… distant since Wally's death.

The next day Tim beams Cassie, Bart, and Jamie into the Batcave.

"Hey, Tim," Cassie greets him, unusually subdued. All of them are, actually, even Bart. That, beyond anything else, is weird.

They all stand in silence for much too long. Awkward doesn't even begin to describe it.

"What do you want to know?" Tim finally offers.

"What happened to you?" Jamie asks seriously.

Tim averts his gaze from all of them. "I guess the closest term would be a mental breakdown. I know, it's not what you may expect, and I know it's dumb, but I just hate it when she calls me Junior."

"Tim, you're the strongest person I know," Cassie says. "It's okay to have weaknesses. It doesn't make me, us, any of us, love you any less."

"Ditto," Bart adds helpfully. "But, why Junior."

Tim shudders at the word. "It's a long story. I just, I never wanted to share it. Have you guys ever heard about how I started as Robin but didn't join the Team for almost seven months and when I finally did I had to sneak to the cave?"

"Once," Jamie says. "But I thought Batman was just protective of you."

Tim laughs bitterly. "He was, but more he didn't want me to hurt anyone else." They all look slightly alarmed. "I wouldn't have meant to, but I wasn't exactly in the healthiest mental state at the time. The Joker, I'd been Robin for a month and the Joker caught me. He killed the previous Robin, you know? I thought he was going to kill me. He wasn't."

"What happened?" Cassie asks.

"The Joker wanted a sidekick, I suppose. And to hurt Batman. He tortured me," Tim says, looking at them for the first time since he started explaining. "Electrocution. Wanted me to be pale like him, so bleach. Green hair dye. It was, three weeks of that, I think. Not just electrocution, but you get the picture. I was pretty willing to tell him everything I know."

Tim closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"He dressed me up like him, I think. I don't remember it all that well. Batgirl tells me he did. They - Harley and the Joker - called me Junior. They tried to get me to shoot Batman."

"What happened?" Bart breaths.

"I shot the Joker," Tim says. "He died. Just… I haven't seen Harley since. It was harder than I thought it would be. There are still scars, I guess, and not just mentally. My skin, I'm pretty careful, but whatever chemicals the Joker put in his bleach have left my skin pretty pale, a lot paler than it used to be. My hair still grows in green. I dye it a lot. It takes a lot since most of it doesn't stick long."

"Tim, you could have told us. We would have understood," Cassie cries, grabbing him in a tight hug.

"Yeah, hermano," Jamie says, joining in the hug. "We're friends."

"Best friends!" Bart exclaims, wrapping his thin arms around all of them in a surprising show of strength. "Just say the word and we'll listen, no judgment!"

"I know," Tim says softly. "I know."

[chronicbatfictioner]

Theater of the Soul - Chapter 23

Tim woke up to a stinging pain on his side, and Jason's face looking down at him from his left side. Also Stephanie's blonde locks on the other side. He would have playfully tugged said blonde if his arms would comply with his mind a little.

"The FBI - took Quinn this afternoon for questioning." somebody - Dick, likely, said from somewhere on his right. Because only Dick could voice something like 'FBI' and 'questioning' into sounding like 'sunshine' and 'apple pie'.

"Hi, kiddo." Jason smiled at him. "Thought you'd be coming 'round 'bout this time."

"Who..." Tim croaked, and winced at his own voice, sounding like a few dozen toads were singing. It felt like said toads were frolicking in his throat, too. Jason promptly shoved a straw into his mouth.

"Drink up. You've been out for like, through the night. Dr Thompkins just gave you like, 20 stitches for your wound. Followed with a very scathing comment at the doctor who caused that wound." Jason grinned impishly. "I think I heard her said something about reporting him to the Doctors' Association or something? Or was it surgeon's association? I dunno. I suppose she'll make sure he'll never practice medicine ever again on the grounds of insanity."

"Doctor...?" Tim croaked again, even after the water went down his throat. There were still several metaphorical frogs lingering. His brain told him that he should be glad he wasn't living in a Harry Potter world - otherwise metaphorical toads could be literal.

"Oh yeah, Dr Thomas Elliott." Stephanie replied, finally getting into Tim's line of vision. "I am very proud to say that my right hook will be forever immortalized in the bruise for that jackass' mugshot when he was arrested for attempted murder." she said. Jason snickered.

"Blondie's got a mean right hook," Jason said. 

Stephanie bowed exaggeratedly. "Thanks, got a lot of practice with wankers at the hospital. There's bound to be at least one whenever I'd go there to pick up my mom."

Tim turned a little to look at Jason.

"How did you get up there...?" he wanted to know.

"Hey, I have great upper body strength--" Jason replied, a little indignantly.

"--he's a Dorito." Stephanie added at the same time.

"--and I can walk, thank you very much. Just a little sore when I walk too long." Jason finished. That Tim knew. Just didn't think that Jason would have literally taxed his physique so severely just to protect Tim...

"Did you guys knew he'll be there?" Tim wondered out loud. The scheme against Dick was quite vivid. But Tim... he would never, in a million years, thought that he would be next on the list of targets.

"Babs told us to keep an eye out when she couldn't find Elliott anywhere. By the way, he'll be charged with manslaughter, first and foremost. Mama Elliott's body was found yesterday." Dick explained. "He'd claimed she had a heart attack, but they're totally going to autopsy her thoroughly this time. And by they, I mean the FBI."

"Ah! The hero is awake!" Barbara called as she wheeled in. "You should know that I've sent all of your findings to Agent Prince, and she was reallydelighted for the 'anonymous tip.'"

"Anonymous?" Tim tried to get up, and winced as his side tightened. Jason and Dick's arms were quickly around him, helping him get up and settled him comfortably in a sitting position.

"Lighten up a little, Timmers. You don't want Leslie scowling at you for popping those stitches." Dick told him.

"Yeah, okay... but anonymous?"

"Yep, the LA cops were still continuing the investigation against Jason, definitely. But your findings tied Napier very closely to Elliott, and Quinn's testimony has tipped the favors onto our side, heavily." Barbara explained. "It appeared that Quinn, finding Jason in Napier's LA house, had... how do I say this--"

"A burst of maternal instinct?" Stephanie suggested, smirking contemptuously.

Barbara scowled, and then shrugged. "Eugh. Fine. Maternal instinct - as much as the feminist in me hate the insinuation that you explicitly have to be female to do the right thing like rescuing a kid out of an insane maniac's... Anyway! Apparently she and Isley had taken Jason out of there after punching Napier and Elliott. She admitted of releasing Jason near the Ventura Highway - the 101, hoping he'd find a hospital and find his way home. She didn't expect him to be absolutely drugged and semi-catatonic and fell back to his street-instincts, instead of simply calling for help."

"So she'd killed Napier?" Tim asked.

"No she didn't. She and her girlfriend Pamela Isley were there. Isley confirmed that she had merely punched Napier and Elliott, and then they threatened the guards - there were five guards - that they were calling the cops. The guards apparently scattered afterward, but Quinn provided some of the guards' names to the feds. Diana said that the FBI's people from their LA Field office should be in the crime scene now, finding the evidence. My gut feelings said that Elliott might have bludgeoned Napier a while afterward." Barbara continued. "I personally believed that Elliott might have tried to use and/or manipulate Napier to try and ruin Bruce, and when that failed even after a year, he'd just lost his temper."

"First name basis with Agent Prince now, are we?" Dick grinned at Barbara.

"Eh... I've been talking with her a lot." Barbara brushed him off. "Jealous, Dickie?" she smirked. Dick raised an eyebrow mischievously, and Jason reached across and smacked him upside the head.

"Head outta the gutter, Dickiebird!" he said. "Point is that somebody could testify that I'm not a murderer."

"Not just someone, actually. I managed to..." Barbara glared at Jason impenitently. "...get to the traffic cams' archives from approximately five months ago, and found the footage of Quinn and Isley getting you out of her car from the 101's entrance cam, and then several other footages from the buildings around it. They should be glad, too, because of their exoneration as an accessory of crimes pretty much relied on their bright blonde and red hairs."

Tim noticed Barbara's lips quivered a little, in spite of the light scoff at the ending of her sentence. His imagination then supplied the images of Jason crawling on his broken legs all the way down from Ventura Highways to Skid Row. A good distance of 30+ miles. His brain supplied that the distance would take approximately eight hours of walking - for a healthy individual. Crawling on broken legs would have taken Jason days.

"Cool," Jason breathed a relieved sigh. "All's well ends well, then?"

"There are... still the due processes. You're technically on house-arrest, Jason. Diana requests it to Bruce." Barbara told him. "And you're not allowed to leave the country, obviously."

"Right, I'd just like to take my vacation to Europe right about now, thanks." Jason quipped, flipping an imaginary long hair haughtily. Then he looked at Tim and grinned. "...Or maybe along with the birthday boy-to-be here. Next Wednesday, isn't it?"

Tim definitely made a mental note to figure out how to stop blushing. Dick, Barbara, and Stephanie were definitely not helping matter any.

"Oooh, sweet lil fifteen!" Dick gushed. "I'm throwing a party."

"I'm totally helping. Let's go, Grayson, we have some scheming to do."

"Keep me in the loop, kids. I'm definitely gonna budget for this." Barbara said, turning around as if preparing to whip up a budget for a party.

"Guys...!" Tim groaned. "Seriously..."

"Yes, seriously." Jason said, wrapping his arm around Tim and clasped Tim's mouth. Tim had to fight the urge to childishly lick Jason's hand. "I didn't get my 15th, or 16th party, Timmers. I don't want you to have the same fate." he said. "Besides, I could use a good party here."

Tim found out that he did not want to see Jason's sad smile again. He nodded. Followed by instinctively wrapping his arms around Jason. Still, Tim was sure his brain did not consent his mouth to say out loud, "my Jaybird."

He froze, as he felt Jason tensed, too. But apparently he did not say it as loud as he thought, because Barbara, Dick, and Stephanie were still bickering among themselves about Tim's birthday party. Jason did not tense for long, as he released Tim from his hug and grinned. "Possessive little Timmybird." he said. His smile warmed Tim's heart more than any blankets could as Tim leaned his head on Jason's shoulder.

"Don't ever fly the coop again, okay?"

Jason nodded. "I promise I won't if you won't."

"And I want that European vacation for my 16th."

"Done deal."

[junker-town]

Which NFL players held out from training camp in 2019?

Melvin Gordon, Ezekiel Elliott, and Jadeveon Clowney all skipped training camp in pursuit of contract extensions, with various results.

When NFL training camps opened in July 2018, many of the league’s biggest names steered clear. Le’Veon Bell, Aaron Donald, Khalil Mack, and Earl Thomas all refused to show up due to qualms with their contracts.

Bell never reported, opting instead to sit out an entire season after the Steelers franchised him in back-to-back years.

Donald’s holdout ended with a record-breaking contract from the Rams. And Mack’s ended when he was traded from the Raiders to the Bears and subsequently given the blockbuster deal he wanted too.

Thomas reluctantly showed up without a new contract from the Seahawks and wasn’t shy about voicing his displeasure — most notably when he suffered a broken leg early in the 2018 season that ended his time in Seattle.

There wasn’t quite the same level of star power on the list of holdouts in 2019. But skipping training camp is a common, and usually effective, tactic. A few players gave it a shot.

Here are the 2019 training camp absentees who stretched their holdouts to the regular season, and the notable players who opted against a holdout or got a contract along the way.

6 players who had holdouts

Trent Williams, OT, Washington

Williams signed a huge extension in 2015, but the guaranteed money has been paid, and his contract is down to its final two years. After it appeared as though he’d sit out the entire season due to his discontent with the team he plays for, Williams reported to the team just minutes after the trade deadline ended.

@nflnetwork Trent Williams just reported to Washington Redskins

— OG aka CAPTAIN 23 (@DeAngeloHall23) October 29, 2019

By showing up, Williams avoided his contract tolling over and leaving him with two seasons left on his deal in Washington.

He’s not in a bad spot with $11 million and $12.5 million in base salary for the next two years, although he’ll only see about $5.8 million of his 2019 salary after sitting out half the. season. But many offensive tackles have shifted the market in the last few years and Williams — who turned 31 in July — is running out of time to get another blockbuster deal.

The bigger part of Williams’ complaint has nothing to do with his salary, though. It’s reportedly due to frustration with the Washington medical staff. Williams had a growth on his head surgically removed, and coach Jay Gruden told reporters that the offensive tackle “wished the diagnosis had come a little sooner” from team doctors.

Williams explained his absence from offseason practices in a meeting with team president Bruce Allen.

“I’ve talked to Trent a few times,” Allen told NBC Sports. ”He’s explained some things to me and I’ll leave it at that.”

He’s so frustrated about the situation that NBC Sports Washington reported “he’s not coming back. Period.”

In spite of that hardline stance and a holdout that kept Williams out for the entire preseason, Washington has reportedly rebuffed trade offers and Allen was adamant all along that the offensive tackle would return.

"I THINK TRENT'S GONNA PLAY FOOTBALL"#Redskins team president Bruce Allen goes 1-on-1 with @SherreeBurruss to talk about the latest with Trent Williams' holdout. Tomorrow, Allen talks about Jay Gruden's job security as well as his own, only on @nbcwashington pic.twitter.com/B14C09rDdp

— NBC4 Sports (@NBC4Sports) August 28, 2019

Williams has been to seven consecutive Pro Bowls, but he hasn’t completed a 16-game season since 2013. Most recently, he missed three games in 2018 due to thumb and rib injuries, and six games in 2017 due to a knee injury. Washington struggled to deal with the absence, and now has journeyman Case Keenum and rookie Dwayne Haskins to protect.

Melvin Gordon, RB, Chargers

Los Angeles is in the thick of contention thanks in part to the ageless play of Philip Rivers, but he was without a key component of his offense in training camp and the beginning of the regular season.

It wasn’t until the end of September that Melvin Gordon finally ended a lengthy holdout and reported to the team facility.

Sources: The holdout is ending. #Chargers RB Melvin Gordon is, in fact, reporting to the team tomorrow. He won’t play this week, but he is planning to be back in the fold with his teammates.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 25, 2019

Gordon has been a big part of the Chargers’ offensive revival, recording nearly 4,400 yards from scrimmage the past three seasons. He’s also been a bit unreliable due to injury — he’s only played one full 16-game campaign in his four-year career. He’s currently on the hook for $5.6 million in the fifth year of his rookie contract, but made just under $5 million for the four years preceding it.

His contract demand was a little surprising, but it makes sense. Gordon comes into 2019 with some leverage after making a leap in 2018; his yards-per-carry average rose from a career mark of 3.8 to 5.1 as Los Angeles rose from the outside of the postseason picture and into a spot in the Divisional Round last January. He also contributed a career-high 4.2 catches per game, playing a massive role as headache-reliever for his aging quarterback.

The Chargers have an estimated $39 million in cap space to spend next spring, but a chunk of that will likely be devoted to Rivers, whose contract is up at the end of the year. Players like Joey Bosa and Keenan Allen will also need to be dealt with soon. If the club thinks Gordon’s jump in efficiency last fall isn’t sustainable, it may hold strong against Gordon’s holdout threat.

Los Angeles reportedly held firm at a $10 million per year offer — well behind the $14.375 million average of Todd Gurley — and that led to a trade request.

Chargers RB Melvin Gordon's agent Damarius Bilbo tells me he requested a trade last wk for his client, after the team remained at their initial offer of aprox $10M/ year. GM Tom Telesco told Bilbo, Gordon is still family, but Bilbo was not given permission to seek trade partners.

— ig: josinaanderson (@JosinaAnderson) August 1, 2019

One that the Chargers eventually gave in to:

Some potentially big news for the #Chargers: They have given the reps for Melvin Gordon permission to seek a trade, sources say. He’ll explore his options, which include returning. But big few days.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) August 31, 2019

Right after that, Chargers GM Tom Telesco announced that the team would not negotiate further with Gordon until after the season. So with no trade brokered, Gordon will evidently have to play 2019 on his current contract.

Given the young tailback’s importance to LA’s offensive identity, the flexibility he brings, and the team’s likely need to keep Rivers happy, an extension seemed logical. Now it appears unlikely.

Ezekiel Elliott, RB, Cowboys

In three seasons in Dallas, Elliott has clearly lived up to his top-five draft status — even if he’s had a few off-field incidents raise issues. He’s averaged 101.2 rushing yards per game with 28 touchdowns and two trips to the Pro Bowl. Keep in mind, Jim Brown is the only player to ever average more than 100 rushing yards per game over the course of his career.

It seemed inevitable that Elliott would be made the highest-paid running back in the NFL at some point. For a while though, he was stuck in the same boat as Jalen Ramsey — another top-five pick from 2016 who wasn’t a top priority because of the fifth-year option on his rookie contract.

The Cowboys are also preoccupied with locking down Dak Prescott and Amari Cooper, but Elliott wanted his discounted salary addressed. He privately said earlier in the summer that would hold out of training camp unless he gets a new contract, according to Pro Football Talk. Then he followed through on that and did not join the team at all during the preseason.

It was a long process for Dallas and Elliott to reach an agreement. First, Elliott was offered a deal that doesn’t top the one Todd Gurley received from the Rams in 2018.

Sources: The most recent offer in negotiations between holdout Ezekiel Elliott and the Cowboys came from the team. Elliott has been offered a contract making him one of the NFL’s 2 highest-paid RB. That would suggest team offering more than LeVeon Bell and less than Todd Gurley.

— Ed Werder (@WerderEdESPN) August 22, 2019

After Cowboys rookie running back Tony Pollard rushed for 42 yards and a touchdown against the Los Angeles Rams, owner Jerry Jones said “Zeke who?” — in a joking manner — when he was asked about Pollard being his best negotiator.

Yes, Jerry Jones said "Zeke who", when asked if Tony Pollard is his "best negotiator". But... this is the full "Zeke who?" sound bite from Jerry, complete with the necessary context of his follow-up to the joke, saying the #Cowboys need both Zeke Elliott and Tony Pollard. pic.twitter.com/yDiZnlwwke

— Mike Leslie (@MikeLeslieWFAA) August 18, 2019

Predictably, Elliott and his agent didn’t find the joke all that funny.

It drew a few laughs but neither @EzekielElliott nor agent Rocky Arceneaux found @Cowboys Jerry Jones' quip "Zeke who?" as amusing. Arceneaux: "I didn't think it was funny and neither did Zeke - we actually thought it was disrespectful."

— Chris Mortensen (@mortreport) August 19, 2019

Pollard was impressive for the Cowboys this preseason and would’ve started if Elliott didn’t report by Week 1, though Jones wasn’t too worried about that:

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones doesn't seem unnerved on @1053thefan with possibility team could start 2019 without RB Ezekiel Elliott. "We've got a marathon here. We want Zeke when we get to the playoffs. We want Zeke when we're in the dog days of the season."

— Michael Gehlken (@GehlkenNFL) August 28, 2019

Ahead of the start of the regular season, the Cowboys finally started making progress on a deal. The negotiations came down to the wire, though.

Then on Sept. 4, Elliott and the Cowboys agreed to a six-year, $90 million deal, making him the highest-paid running back in the NFL.

Jadeveon Clowney, DE, Texans

The No. 1 pick in the 2014 NFL Draft may not be the unstoppable sack machine that many expected him to be, but Clowney has emerged as a three-time Pro Bowler. He’s valuable enough that the Texans gave him a franchise tag that guarantees him $15.967 million in 2019.

That’s a good pay day for Clowney. The problem is that it lacks long-term security and is below market value for the position. He stayed away from camp and sat out all of preseason before he was traded to the Seahawks a week before the start of the regular season.

The situation was bungled by Houston, which got only a third-round pick and two backup linebackers in exchange for one of the NFL’s better defensive players.

It didn’t help negotiations when the Texans fired general manager Brian Gaine in June and bungled their attempts to replace him. That left interim general manager Chris Olsen and coach Bill O’Brien about a month to work on a deal with Clowney.

Bill O'Brien on Jadeveon Clowney and if Brian Gaine firing affects anything with his status going forward: 'He's been franchised. He's not here. It is what it is.'

— Aaron Wilson (@AaronWilson_NFL) June 11, 2019

With Clowney opting against signing his franchise tender, the Texans weren’t be able to fine him for missing training camp practices. Clowney took his holdout a step further by firing his agent Bus Cook just prior to the trade getting done.

Jadeveon Clowney fired veteran agent Bus Cook, according to league sources today. Texans unsigned franchise player extremely frustrated with situation has five days before he can hire new agent

— Aaron Wilson (@AaronWilson_NFL) August 27, 2019

Now he’s a member of the Seahawks.

Michael Thomas, WR, Saints

Not many people were expecting Thomas to hold out. Mostly because he was adamant all offseason that it’s not his style.

“I’m a football player first — I like being at work.” Thomas told ESPN in May. “I feel pretty certain that everything will get taken care of and handled professionally. This is how I approach the game and how I show up to work the same way, and everything else will take care of itself.”

So even though he was a surprising member of the holdout club, his gambit paid off in a big way. Thomas was set to make a laughably low $1.148 million for the 2019 season. His absence set new contract negotiations in motion in New Orleans — and he left the table with the richest deal a wide receiver’s ever seen.

Thomas and the Saints came to terns on an extension that will pay the young wideout $100 million over five years, with $61 million of that guaranteed. It’s the largest deal any wide receiver has ever earned in NFL history, eclipsing the five year, $90 million contract Odell Beckham signed with the Giants in 2018.

Yannick Ngakoue, DE, Jaguars

Jacksonville appears to have prioritized an extension for Ngakoue ahead of a deal for cornerback Jalen Ramsey.

That makes sense, considering both were drafted in 2016 but Ramsey was the first-round pick. That means he had a fifth-year option on his contract that keeps him locked up through the 2020 season. Ngakoue is entering the last year of his rookie deal, so his contract situation is a more immediate hurdle for the Jaguars to clear.

Ngakoue sat out offseason workouts earlier this year for that reason.

Statement from Jaguars’ DE Yannick Ngakoue: “I will not be attending minicamp as my contract has not been resolved. I remain committed to Jacksonville, the fans and my teammates. My hope is to be with Jacksonville for years to come.”

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) June 10, 2019

In three seasons with the Jaguars, Ngakoue has 29.5 sacks and one trip to the Pro Bowl. That kind of production should put him in the same tier as Demarcus Lawrence, Frank Clark, Trey Flowers, and Dee Ford — each of whom got a pricy five-year deal in 2019 that averaged between $17.1 and $21 million.

A training camp holdout started, and he looked like a player who could’ve considered dragging his contract dispute into September. But with no deal in sight and an upcoming risk of not reaching unrestricted free agency, Ngakoue decided to reverse course.

Now he’s not ruling out a contract extension with the team, but he doesn’t sound too optimistic.

#Jaguars DE Yannick Ngakoue: "They had a chance to sign me for a long-term deal but it didn't get done. It is what it is. I love football, love my teammates, and I'm here to play games." Could a deal get done before the season? "It's out of my hands. I don't even know."

— Phillip Heilman (@phillip_heilman) August 4, 2019

Ngakoue is scheduled to become a free agent in March.

6 notable players who opted against a holdout

Chris Jones, DT, Chiefs

Kansas City did some high-stakes tinkering with its pass rush during the offseason, shipping Dee Ford to the 49ers and filling his role by trading for Frank Clark. But the real centerpiece of the Chiefs’ defense is Jones, who had 15.5 sacks in 2018.

With his contract expiring after the 2019 season, Jones skipped offseason practices this spring. The Chiefs responded to the absence by playing hardball.

From Up to the Minute Live: The #Chiefs have mandatory minicamp without DT Chris Jones, who wants a new contract. Sounds like KC won't negotiate until Jones shows up. pic.twitter.com/k5EMeGFxyG

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) June 11, 2019

The good news for the Chiefs was that Jones had a reason to show up shortly after training camp opens. If he didn’t arrive to camp by Aug. 6, he would’ve been set to reach restricted free agency next year rather than unrestricted free agency.

Camp opens for the Chiefs on July 24, so Jones would have been rolling the dice if he didn’t show up within the first couple weeks. Aaron Donald faced the same situation in 2018 and blew through the deadline in pursuit of a new contract.

He still didn’t show up until the Rams gave him a record-breaking deal on the last day of August.

Jones took the opposite strategy and arrived for camp, although he made it clear that he isn’t going to get any cheaper.

Per the Katz. brothers regarding Chris Jones, who is now reporting to camp on time: “He knows his value and if he has to play out his deal in order to reach free agency, then that’s what he will do. For now, he’s focused on winning a Super Bowl for Kansas City.”

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) July 26, 2019

Robbie Gould, K, 49ers

There aren’t many examples of kickers holding out, but Gould made it clear that San Francisco isn’t a place he wants to be. He requested a trade in April and told the 49ers that he won’t negotiate a long-term deal ahead of the July 15 deadline for an extension.

In a turn of events, 49ers’ franchise kicker Robbie Gould has pulled his contract proposals that he sent to San Francisco and told the team he will not negotiate or sign a long-term deal with them, and he would like to be traded, Gould said Tuesday.

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) April 23, 2019

The 49ers didn’t take long to deny the trade request:

Will you trade Robbie Gould? “No.” - Kyle Shanahan

— Jennifer Lee Chan (@jenniferleechan) April 26, 2019

Kickers are often cogs that are easy to replace, but Gould has some leverage after leading the NFL in field goal percentage in 2019 by nailing 33 of his 34 tries. That was enough to more than double the average annual salary of his last contract and make him one of the highest paid specialists in the game this fall.

The 49ers were able to change Gould’s mind and avoid a holdout by inking him to a four-year deal to stay in the Bay Area.

Details on Robbie Gould’s extension with #49ers: It’s 2 years, $10.5M fully guaranteed at signing. Team must decide whether to fully guarantee half his $4.5M salary for 2021 before Week 16 of 2020 season, and the other half by the following April. Full deal 4 years, $19M.

— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) July 15, 2019

That resolved the issue before it ever reached training camp.

Bobby Wagner, LB, Seahawks

As far as holdouts go, Wagner’s hunt for a new contract has been as amicable as possible. The linebacker chose against practicing in OTAs, but still showed up at the facility and participated without going on the field.

“He handled it beautifully,” Seahawks coach Pete Carroll told reporters, via 247Sports. “Bobby’s an incredible player in this program. Everything that he does, his presence is obvious. He’s been around for everything. He’s been involved with everything and he’s handled it exactly the way he should under these circumstances.”

Things may get a little more contentious when it gets closer to the season, though. Wagner is arguably the best linebacker in the NFL, but now he has serious leverage for a pay raise thanks to C.J. Mosley. The Jets gave Mosley a five-year contract that averages $17 million per year — waaaaay more than Luke Kuechly’s $12.36 million average that previously reigned as the top salary for an inside linebacker.

Wagner is entering the final year of his contract and remains an integral part of the Seahawks. The defense has undergone a transformation in the wake of the Legion of Boom’s demise, and Wagner’s been the player who has held the unit together through the transition.

But it’s going to be a tough negotiation, thanks in no small part to Mosley’s outlier of a contract.

Wagner’s expected to show up, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll fully participate. His previous strategy of staying off the practice field could extend into training camp too.

#Seahawks star LB Bobby Wagner is expected to show up for training camp tomorrow, sources say, because of the kind of leader he is and wanting to be there with his teammates. He may not put himself in harm’s way until a deal gets done, and he’ll be cautious. But he’ll be there.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) July 23, 2019

For now, he belongs in this bottom tier of non-holdouts, but that could still change depending on his participation.

Julio Jones, WR, Falcons

The Falcons placated Jones last year when he opted to skip out on the beginning of training camp. While the star receiver didn’t get the huge contract he was aiming for, the Falcons shifted money around on the deal to give him more money in 2018.

“We have come to an agreement with Julio, and we will re-address everything in 2019,” Falcons general manager Thomas Dimitroff said in a statement at the time.

Well now it’s well into 2019 and the contract still hasn’t been re-addressed. There was a report in April that a deal was close to finished, but nothing came of that. Jones then sat out OTAs, setting the table for a training camp holdout. Instead, he showed up.

I want to be the best teammate I can possibly be, Julio says. That’s his focus right now, not the noise about his contract.

— Jeañña (@jeannathomas) July 24, 2019

After five straight Pro Bowl seasons with at least 1,400 receiving yards each, Jones isn’t going to come cheap. He’ll probably want a contract that eclipses the $18 million per year that was awarded to Odell Beckham Jr. last year.

There’s not much reason to believe the Falcons won’t pay up, so Jones trusted that he didn’t need to steer clear.

Darius Slay, CB, Lions

On the list of underpaid players coming up on the end of their contracts, Slay is in a different situation. He signed an extension in 2016 and still has two years left with base salaries of $12.55 million and $10 million on the way.

Since signing that deal, Slay has been to the Pro Bowl two times while several other cornerbacks got more lucrative contracts. He’s also gone through the guaranteed portions of the deal.

Now Slay’s angling for another contract that pays him like the elite cornerback that he is and gives him some security. And threatening to skip some of training camp was part of his strategy.

“Will I be there?” Slay said of training camp on a podcast in June, via the Detroit Free Press. “We’ll see. Time will tell.”

Ultimately, he decided not to follow through on that.

#Lions CB Darius Slay also will report, source said. Detroit at full strength for start of camp. https://t.co/6lycY14LLV

— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) July 23, 2019

With two years left on his deal, Detroit doesn’t need to do Slay any favors and restructure it. But the Lions are also sitting pretty with over $23 million in cap space and can afford to kick one of their best players a little more. It just doesn’t look like it’s going to happen this year.

Duke Johnson, RB, Browns

Johnson is on the hunt for a new uniform more than a new contract. The Browns running back says his goal is “to be somewhere [where he’s] wanted.”

Duke Johnson Jr. explains his trade request & why he doesn’t feel wanted by #Browns anymore pic.twitter.com/EyRQ5MNiaY

— Daryl Ruiter (@RuiterWrongFAN) June 4, 2019

The Browns — like the 49ers with Robbie Gould — haven’t been very receptive of the request:

#Browns head coach Freddie Kitchens minces NO words w/ us on unhappy RB Duke Johnson: “He wants to be traded. I want to win the lottery. It doesn’t matter. He’s under contract. He’s a Cleveland Brown he’s going to be used to the best of his ability in what benefits the team.”

— Aditi Kinkhabwala (@AKinkhabwala) June 4, 2019

Johnson is currently set to be Nick Chubb’s backup in Cleveland, and his touches will likely decline when an eight-game suspension for Kareem Hunt is up. Johnson finished the 2018 season with just 40 rushing attempts, despite averaging 5.0 yards per carry. He contributed a little more in the pass game with 47 receptions, but that was down from 74 receptions in 2017.

While his trade demands haven’t gone anywhere, Johnson showed up for minicamp and now training camp too.

#Browns RB Duke Johnson, who has requested a trade from Cleveland, will report to the #Browns for training camp today, source said. His situation remains fluid, but he will be present.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) July 24, 2019

His presence at training camp doesn’t mean he’s happy with his situation in Cleveland, though.

Update: Johnson was traded to the Houston Texans on August 8 in exchange for a conditional fourth round pick that can be bumped up to a third round pick if he plays 10 games.

Browns trade RB Duke Johnson to @HoustonTexans for a conditional 2020 fourth-round pick. (via @TomPelissero) pic.twitter.com/kYx8JN2Dty

— NFL (@NFL) August 8, 2019

[junker-town]

Which NFL players are holding out from training camp in 2019?

Melvin Gordon, Ezekiel Elliott, and Jadeveon Clowney all skipped training camp in pursuit of contract extensions, with various results.

When NFL training camps opened in July 2018, many of the league’s biggest names steered clear. Le’Veon Bell, Aaron Donald, Khalil Mack, and Earl Thomas all refused to show up due to qualms with their contracts.

Bell never reported, opting instead to sit out an entire season after the Steelers franchised him in back-to-back years.

Donald’s holdout ended with a record-breaking contract from the Rams. And Mack’s ended when he was traded from the Raiders to the Bears and subsequently given the blockbuster deal he wanted too.

Thomas reluctantly showed up without a new contract from the Seahawks and wasn’t shy about voicing his displeasure — most notably when he suffered a broken leg early in the 2018 season that ended his time in Seattle.

There wasn’t quite the same level of star power on the list of holdouts in 2019. But skipping training camp is a common, and usually effective, tactic. A few players gave it a shot.

Here are the 2019 training camp absentees who stretched their holdouts to the regular season, and the notable players who opted against a holdout or got a contract along the way.

Just 1 NFL player still hasn’t reported to their team

Trent Williams, OT, Washington

Williams signed a huge extension in 2015, but the guaranteed money has been paid, and his contract is down to its final two years. Williams may want more now.

#Redskins LT Trent Williams, not spotted in the building this morning, wants a new deal, I’m told. His deal was huge when he signed out, but the market has shifted greatly. https://t.co/12AFhn394d

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) June 4, 2019

He’s not in a bad spot with $11 million and $12.5 million in base salary for the next two years. But many offensive tackles have shifted the market in the last few years and Williams — who turned 31 in July — is running out of time to get another blockbuster deal.

But the bigger part of Williams’ complaint may have nothing to do with his salary. It’s reportedly due to frustration with the Washington medical staff. Williams had a growth on his head surgically removed, and coach Jay Gruden told reporters that the offensive tackle “wished the diagnosis had come a little sooner” from team doctors.

Williams explained his absence from offseason practices in a meeting with team president Bruce Allen.

“I’ve talked to Trent a few times,” Allen told NBC Sports. ”He’s explained some things to me and I’ll leave it at that.”

He’s so frustrated about the situation that NBC Sports Washington reported “he’s not coming back. Period.”

In spite of that hardline stance and a holdout that kept Williams out for the entire preseason, Washington has reportedly rebuffed trade offers and Allen is adamant the offensive tackle will return.

"I THINK TRENT'S GONNA PLAY FOOTBALL"#Redskins team president Bruce Allen goes 1-on-1 with @SherreeBurruss to talk about the latest with Trent Williams' holdout. Tomorrow, Allen talks about Jay Gruden's job security as well as his own, only on @nbcwashington pic.twitter.com/B14C09rDdp

— NBC4 Sports (@NBC4Sports) August 28, 2019

Gruden also does not think Williams will be traded, though the tackle won’t play in Week 1:

This was the expectation but now official: #Redskins LT Trent Williams did not show up at the team facility today to practice with his team. His holdout continues into the regular season and he won’t play Sunday — at least.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 4, 2019

After that, however, there might be hope for a return. Former teammate DeAngelo Hall told The Athletic’s Erin Hawksworth that Williams could rejoin the team “sooner rather than later.”

Williams has been to seven consecutive Pro Bowls, but he hasn’t completed a 16-game season since 2013. Most recently, he missed three games in 2018 due to thumb and rib injuries, and six games in 2017 due to a knee injury. Washington struggled to deal with the absence, and now has journeyman Case Keenum and rookie Dwayne Haskins to protect.

5 players who ended holdouts

Melvin Gordon, RB, Chargers

Los Angeles is in the thick of contention thanks in part to the ageless play of Philip Rivers, but he was without a key component of his offense in training camp and the beginning of the regular season.

It wasn’t until the end of September that Melvin Gordon finally ended a lengthy holdout and reported to the team facility.

Sources: The holdout is ending. #Chargers RB Melvin Gordon is, in fact, reporting to the team tomorrow. He won’t play this week, but he is planning to be back in the fold with his teammates.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 25, 2019

Gordon has been a big part of the Chargers’ offensive revival, recording nearly 4,400 yards from scrimmage the past three seasons. He’s also been a bit unreliable due to injury — he’s only played one full 16-game campaign in his four-year career. He’s currently on the hook for $5.6 million in the fifth year of his rookie contract, but made just under $5 million for the four years preceding it.

His contract demand was a little surprising, but it makes sense. Gordon comes into 2019 with some leverage after making a leap in 2018; his yards-per-carry average rose from a career mark of 3.8 to 5.1 as Los Angeles rose from the outside of the postseason picture and into a spot in the Divisional Round last January. He also contributed a career-high 4.2 catches per game, playing a massive role as headache-reliever for his aging quarterback.

The Chargers have an estimated $39 million in cap space to spend next spring, but a chunk of that will likely be devoted to Rivers, whose contract is up at the end of the year. Players like Joey Bosa and Keenan Allen will also need to be dealt with soon. If the club thinks Gordon’s jump in efficiency last fall isn’t sustainable, it may hold strong against Gordon’s holdout threat.

Los Angeles reportedly held firm at a $10 million per year offer — well behind the $14.375 million average of Todd Gurley — and that led to a trade request.

Chargers RB Melvin Gordon's agent Damarius Bilbo tells me he requested a trade last wk for his client, after the team remained at their initial offer of aprox $10M/ year. GM Tom Telesco told Bilbo, Gordon is still family, but Bilbo was not given permission to seek trade partners.

— ig: josinaanderson (@JosinaAnderson) August 1, 2019

One that the Chargers eventually gave in to:

Some potentially big news for the #Chargers: They have given the reps for Melvin Gordon permission to seek a trade, sources say. He’ll explore his options, which include returning. But big few days.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) August 31, 2019

Right after that, Chargers GM Tom Telesco announced that the team would not negotiate further with Gordon until after the season. So with no trade brokered, Gordon will evidently have to play 2019 on his current contract.

Given the young tailback’s importance to LA’s offensive identity, the flexibility he brings, and the team’s likely need to keep Rivers happy, an extension seemed logical. Now it appears unlikely.

Ezekiel Elliott, RB, Cowboys

In three seasons in Dallas, Elliott has clearly lived up to his top-five draft status — even if he’s had a few off-field incidents raise issues. He’s averaged 101.2 rushing yards per game with 28 touchdowns and two trips to the Pro Bowl. Keep in mind, Jim Brown is the only player to ever average more than 100 rushing yards per game over the course of his career.

It seemed inevitable that Elliott would be made the highest-paid running back in the NFL at some point. For a while though, he was stuck in the same boat as Jalen Ramsey — another top-five pick from 2016 who wasn’t a top priority because of the fifth-year option on his rookie contract.

The Cowboys are also preoccupied with locking down Dak Prescott and Amari Cooper, but Elliott wanted his discounted salary addressed. He privately said earlier in the summer that would hold out of training camp unless he gets a new contract, according to Pro Football Talk. Then he followed through on that and did not join the team at all during the preseason.

It was a long process for Dallas and Elliott to reach an agreement. First, Elliott was offered a deal that doesn’t top the one Todd Gurley received from the Rams in 2018.

Sources: The most recent offer in negotiations between holdout Ezekiel Elliott and the Cowboys came from the team. Elliott has been offered a contract making him one of the NFL’s 2 highest-paid RB. That would suggest team offering more than LeVeon Bell and less than Todd Gurley.

— Ed Werder (@WerderEdESPN) August 22, 2019

After Cowboys rookie running back Tony Pollard rushed for 42 yards and a touchdown against the Los Angeles Rams, owner Jerry Jones said “Zeke who?” — in a joking manner — when he was asked about Pollard being his best negotiator.

Yes, Jerry Jones said "Zeke who", when asked if Tony Pollard is his "best negotiator". But... this is the full "Zeke who?" sound bite from Jerry, complete with the necessary context of his follow-up to the joke, saying the #Cowboys need both Zeke Elliott and Tony Pollard. pic.twitter.com/yDiZnlwwke

— Mike Leslie (@MikeLeslieWFAA) August 18, 2019

Predictably, Elliott and his agent didn’t find the joke all that funny.

It drew a few laughs but neither @EzekielElliott nor agent Rocky Arceneaux found @Cowboys Jerry Jones' quip "Zeke who?" as amusing. Arceneaux: "I didn't think it was funny and neither did Zeke - we actually thought it was disrespectful."

— Chris Mortensen (@mortreport) August 19, 2019

Pollard was impressive for the Cowboys this preseason and would’ve started if Elliott didn’t report by Week 1, though Jones wasn’t too worried about that:

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones doesn't seem unnerved on @1053thefan with possibility team could start 2019 without RB Ezekiel Elliott. "We've got a marathon here. We want Zeke when we get to the playoffs. We want Zeke when we're in the dog days of the season."

— Michael Gehlken (@GehlkenNFL) August 28, 2019

Ahead of the start of the regular season, the Cowboys finally started making progress on a deal. The negotiations came down to the wire, though.

Then on Sept. 4, Elliott and the Cowboys agreed to a six-year, $90 million deal, making him the highest-paid running back in the NFL.

Jadeveon Clowney, DE, Texans

The No. 1 pick in the 2014 NFL Draft may not be the unstoppable sack machine that many expected him to be, but Clowney has emerged as a three-time Pro Bowler. He’s valuable enough that the Texans gave him a franchise tag that guarantees him $15.967 million in 2019.

That’s a good pay day for Clowney. The problem is that it lacks long-term security and is below market value for the position. He stayed away from camp and sat out all of preseason before he was traded to the Seahawks a week before the start of the regular season.

The situation was bungled by Houston, which got only a third-round pick and two backup linebackers in exchange for one of the NFL’s better defensive players.

It didn’t help negotiations when the Texans fired general manager Brian Gaine in June and bungled their attempts to replace him. That left interim general manager Chris Olsen and coach Bill O’Brien about a month to work on a deal with Clowney.

Bill O'Brien on Jadeveon Clowney and if Brian Gaine firing affects anything with his status going forward: 'He's been franchised. He's not here. It is what it is.'

— Aaron Wilson (@AaronWilson_NFL) June 11, 2019

With Clowney opting against signing his franchise tender, the Texans weren’t be able to fine him for missing training camp practices. Clowney took his holdout a step further by firing his agent Bus Cook just prior to the trade getting done.

Jadeveon Clowney fired veteran agent Bus Cook, according to league sources today. Texans unsigned franchise player extremely frustrated with situation has five days before he can hire new agent

— Aaron Wilson (@AaronWilson_NFL) August 27, 2019

Now he’s a member of the Seahawks.

Michael Thomas, WR, Saints

Not many people were expecting Thomas to hold out. Mostly because he was adamant all offseason that it’s not his style.

“I’m a football player first — I like being at work.” Thomas told ESPN in May. “I feel pretty certain that everything will get taken care of and handled professionally. This is how I approach the game and how I show up to work the same way, and everything else will take care of itself.”

So even though he was a surprising member of the holdout club, his gambit paid off in a big way. Thomas was set to make a laughably low $1.148 million for the 2019 season. His absence set new contract negotiations in motion in New Orleans — and he left the table with the richest deal a wide receiver’s ever seen.

Thomas and the Saints came to terns on an extension that will pay the young wideout $100 million over five years, with $61 million of that guaranteed. It’s the largest deal any wide receiver has ever earned in NFL history, eclipsing the five year, $90 million contract Odell Beckham signed with the Giants in 2018.

Yannick Ngakoue, DE, Jaguars

Jacksonville appears to have prioritized an extension for Ngakoue ahead of a deal for cornerback Jalen Ramsey.

That makes sense, considering both were drafted in 2016 but Ramsey was the first-round pick. That means he had a fifth-year option on his contract that keeps him locked up through the 2020 season. Ngakoue is entering the last year of his rookie deal, so his contract situation is a more immediate hurdle for the Jaguars to clear.

Ngakoue sat out offseason workouts earlier this year for that reason.

Statement from Jaguars’ DE Yannick Ngakoue: “I will not be attending minicamp as my contract has not been resolved. I remain committed to Jacksonville, the fans and my teammates. My hope is to be with Jacksonville for years to come.”

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) June 10, 2019

In three seasons with the Jaguars, Ngakoue has 29.5 sacks and one trip to the Pro Bowl. That kind of production should put him in the same tier as Demarcus Lawrence, Frank Clark, Trey Flowers, and Dee Ford — each of whom got a pricy five-year deal in 2019 that averaged between $17.1 and $21 million.

A training camp holdout started, and he looked like a player who could’ve considered dragging his contract dispute into September. But with no deal in sight and an upcoming risk of not reaching unrestricted free agency, Ngakoue decided to reverse course.

Now he’s not ruling out a contract extension with the team, but he doesn’t sound too optimistic.

#Jaguars DE Yannick Ngakoue: "They had a chance to sign me for a long-term deal but it didn't get done. It is what it is. I love football, love my teammates, and I'm here to play games." Could a deal get done before the season? "It's out of my hands. I don't even know."

— Phillip Heilman (@phillip_heilman) August 4, 2019

Ngakoue is scheduled to become a free agent in March.

6 notable players who opted against a holdout

Chris Jones, DT, Chiefs

Kansas City did some high-stakes tinkering with its pass rush during the offseason, shipping Dee Ford to the 49ers and filling his role by trading for Frank Clark. But the real centerpiece of the Chiefs’ defense is Jones, who had 15.5 sacks in 2018.

With his contract expiring after the 2019 season, Jones skipped offseason practices this spring. The Chiefs responded to the absence by playing hardball.

From Up to the Minute Live: The #Chiefs have mandatory minicamp without DT Chris Jones, who wants a new contract. Sounds like KC won't negotiate until Jones shows up. pic.twitter.com/k5EMeGFxyG

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) June 11, 2019

The good news for the Chiefs was that Jones had a reason to show up shortly after training camp opens. If he didn’t arrive to camp by Aug. 6, he would’ve been set to reach restricted free agency next year rather than unrestricted free agency.

Camp opens for the Chiefs on July 24, so Jones would have been rolling the dice if he didn’t show up within the first couple weeks. Aaron Donald faced the same situation in 2018 and blew through the deadline in pursuit of a new contract.

He still didn’t show up until the Rams gave him a record-breaking deal on the last day of August.

Jones took the opposite strategy and arrived for camp, although he made it clear that he isn’t going to get any cheaper.

Per the Katz. brothers regarding Chris Jones, who is now reporting to camp on time: “He knows his value and if he has to play out his deal in order to reach free agency, then that’s what he will do. For now, he’s focused on winning a Super Bowl for Kansas City.”

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) July 26, 2019

Robbie Gould, K, 49ers

There aren’t many examples of kickers holding out, but Gould made it clear that San Francisco isn’t a place he wants to be. He requested a trade in April and told the 49ers that he won’t negotiate a long-term deal ahead of the July 15 deadline for an extension.

In a turn of events, 49ers’ franchise kicker Robbie Gould has pulled his contract proposals that he sent to San Francisco and told the team he will not negotiate or sign a long-term deal with them, and he would like to be traded, Gould said Tuesday.

— Adam Schefter (@AdamSchefter) April 23, 2019

The 49ers didn’t take long to deny the trade request:

Will you trade Robbie Gould? “No.” - Kyle Shanahan

— Jennifer Lee Chan (@jenniferleechan) April 26, 2019

Kickers are often cogs that are easy to replace, but Gould has some leverage after leading the NFL in field goal percentage in 2019 by nailing 33 of his 34 tries. That was enough to more than double the average annual salary of his last contract and make him one of the highest paid specialists in the game this fall.

The 49ers were able to change Gould’s mind and avoid a holdout by inking him to a four-year deal to stay in the Bay Area.

Details on Robbie Gould’s extension with #49ers: It’s 2 years, $10.5M fully guaranteed at signing. Team must decide whether to fully guarantee half his $4.5M salary for 2021 before Week 16 of 2020 season, and the other half by the following April. Full deal 4 years, $19M.

— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) July 15, 2019

That resolved the issue before it ever reached training camp.

Bobby Wagner, LB, Seahawks

As far as holdouts go, Wagner’s hunt for a new contract has been as amicable as possible. The linebacker chose against practicing in OTAs, but still showed up at the facility and participated without going on the field.

“He handled it beautifully,” Seahawks coach Pete Carroll told reporters, via 247Sports. “Bobby’s an incredible player in this program. Everything that he does, his presence is obvious. He’s been around for everything. He’s been involved with everything and he’s handled it exactly the way he should under these circumstances.”

Things may get a little more contentious when it gets closer to the season, though. Wagner is arguably the best linebacker in the NFL, but now he has serious leverage for a pay raise thanks to C.J. Mosley. The Jets gave Mosley a five-year contract that averages $17 million per year — waaaaay more than Luke Kuechly’s $12.36 million average that previously reigned as the top salary for an inside linebacker.

Wagner is entering the final year of his contract and remains an integral part of the Seahawks. The defense has undergone a transformation in the wake of the Legion of Boom’s demise, and Wagner’s been the player who has held the unit together through the transition.

But it’s going to be a tough negotiation, thanks in no small part to Mosley’s outlier of a contract.

Wagner’s expected to show up, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll fully participate. His previous strategy of staying off the practice field could extend into training camp too.

#Seahawks star LB Bobby Wagner is expected to show up for training camp tomorrow, sources say, because of the kind of leader he is and wanting to be there with his teammates. He may not put himself in harm’s way until a deal gets done, and he’ll be cautious. But he’ll be there.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) July 23, 2019

For now, he belongs in this bottom tier of non-holdouts, but that could still change depending on his participation.

Julio Jones, WR, Falcons

The Falcons placated Jones last year when he opted to skip out on the beginning of training camp. While the star receiver didn’t get the huge contract he was aiming for, the Falcons shifted money around on the deal to give him more money in 2018.

“We have come to an agreement with Julio, and we will re-address everything in 2019,” Falcons general manager Thomas Dimitroff said in a statement at the time.

Well now it’s well into 2019 and the contract still hasn’t been re-addressed. There was a report in April that a deal was close to finished, but nothing came of that. Jones then sat out OTAs, setting the table for a training camp holdout. Instead, he showed up.

I want to be the best teammate I can possibly be, Julio says. That’s his focus right now, not the noise about his contract.

— Jeañña (@jeannathomas) July 24, 2019

After five straight Pro Bowl seasons with at least 1,400 receiving yards each, Jones isn’t going to come cheap. He’ll probably want a contract that eclipses the $18 million per year that was awarded to Odell Beckham Jr. last year.

There’s not much reason to believe the Falcons won’t pay up, so Jones trusted that he didn’t need to steer clear.

Darius Slay, CB, Lions

On the list of underpaid players coming up on the end of their contracts, Slay is in a different situation. He signed an extension in 2016 and still has two years left with base salaries of $12.55 million and $10 million on the way.

Since signing that deal, Slay has been to the Pro Bowl two times while several other cornerbacks got more lucrative contracts. He’s also gone through the guaranteed portions of the deal.

Now Slay’s angling for another contract that pays him like the elite cornerback that he is and gives him some security. And threatening to skip some of training camp was part of his strategy.

“Will I be there?” Slay said of training camp on a podcast in June, via the Detroit Free Press. “We’ll see. Time will tell.”

Ultimately, he decided not to follow through on that.

#Lions CB Darius Slay also will report, source said. Detroit at full strength for start of camp. https://t.co/6lycY14LLV

— Tom Pelissero (@TomPelissero) July 23, 2019

With two years left on his deal, Detroit doesn’t need to do Slay any favors and restructure it. But the Lions are also sitting pretty with over $23 million in cap space and can afford to kick one of their best players a little more. It just doesn’t look like it’s going to happen this year.

Duke Johnson, RB, Browns

Johnson is on the hunt for a new uniform more than a new contract. The Browns running back says his goal is “to be somewhere [where he’s] wanted.”

Duke Johnson Jr. explains his trade request & why he doesn’t feel wanted by #Browns anymore pic.twitter.com/EyRQ5MNiaY

— Daryl Ruiter (@RuiterWrongFAN) June 4, 2019

The Browns — like the 49ers with Robbie Gould — haven’t been very receptive of the request:

#Browns head coach Freddie Kitchens minces NO words w/ us on unhappy RB Duke Johnson: “He wants to be traded. I want to win the lottery. It doesn’t matter. He’s under contract. He’s a Cleveland Brown he’s going to be used to the best of his ability in what benefits the team.”

— Aditi Kinkhabwala (@AKinkhabwala) June 4, 2019

Johnson is currently set to be Nick Chubb’s backup in Cleveland, and his touches will likely decline when an eight-game suspension for Kareem Hunt is up. Johnson finished the 2018 season with just 40 rushing attempts, despite averaging 5.0 yards per carry. He contributed a little more in the pass game with 47 receptions, but that was down from 74 receptions in 2017.

While his trade demands haven’t gone anywhere, Johnson showed up for minicamp and now training camp too.

#Browns RB Duke Johnson, who has requested a trade from Cleveland, will report to the #Browns for training camp today, source said. His situation remains fluid, but he will be present.

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) July 24, 2019

His presence at training camp doesn’t mean he’s happy with his situation in Cleveland, though.

Update: Johnson was traded to the Houston Texans on August 8 in exchange for a conditional fourth round pick that can be bumped up to a third round pick if he plays 10 games.

Browns trade RB Duke Johnson to @HoustonTexans for a conditional 2020 fourth-round pick. (via @TomPelissero) pic.twitter.com/kYx8JN2Dty

— NFL (@NFL) August 8, 2019