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varusai · 4 years ago

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who do you think is the most dateable dark matter thief?? i know you have an opinion and i need to hear it

sorry for the late response anon i honestly had to think abt this one for a few days lmao, but yeah i have opinions. below the cut bc fr i have opinions, all of them have major pros and cons (based on my characterization at least) and really i just have to break it down for u

Boros, everyones obvious first choice, but certainly not mine.

Pros: rich, tall, pretty, fun af, passionate, will kill for you np, give you anything you want, literally anything.

cons: has a god complex, doesnt respect you, not his number one priority at all, will forget about you once its not interesting for him anymore, probably argumentative/combative af, is very very smart and has no problem manipulating you in all the worst ways, is very entitled so he will never feel bad about anything, cant win arguments either bc he’ll want to settle it with combat, will get offended over little things just to argue bc he thinks thats fun

this is a relationship you’d get into if you literally have nothing to lose and dont care about your mental health. like hes hot but this shit would be toxic af and he will ruin your life and leave you to go fuck around and fight someone on the other side of the universe. this will be the best of times and the worst of times for you and you will never be the same afterward mentally or emotionally. the only way i would even consider it is if i lost my damn mind. The only way a relationship with him would ever work long term is if you were physically stronger than him and were capable of putting him in his place OR you were smart enough, suicidal enough, and interesting enough to him to engage in some psychological warfare and reject him if he asked you. Make him chase you for years, say yes, then decide that /he’s/ boring /you/ and leave him for another member of the squad to just destroy their established hierarchy and humble him to the point that he’s obsessed with you.

i dont have the energy for all that, so i’ll just smash and pass.

0/10 completely undateable

Geryuganshoop, also a probable second choice for many:

pros: cute, nice, tentacle alien (obviously), will respect you np, will also give you anything you want, not antagonistic at all, telepathic communication so no risk of miscommunication, emotionally intelligent and available, loyal to a fault,

cons: horrible boss/best friend that you will have to listen to him vent about for at least 3 hours a day, complete yes man as well so he will not tell boros no or cut him off and you will be stuck dealing with this no matter what, severely mentally ill and wont go to therapy bc he thinks hes handling it well, workaholic, needs a lot, and i mean A LOT of attention

this relationship would be great if not for boros lol. boros sabotages his social and romantic life but geryu has been friends with him too long to either cut him off or establish boundaries. he has no backbone (figuratively and literally) and wouldnt even consider it. he’ll ignore you in favor of his job too, to a massive degree. also i think that while the telepathic communication would be a major plus in most cases, here i feel like i’d have no less than 16 different, never before seen on earth, mental illnesses projected right into my brain just from being within a certain radius of him.

im already fucked up enough in that sense so pass unfortunately.

it would be a yes without boros in the picture tho lmao

so prob like 4/10 iffy datablillity, 1 level increase with each decade of therapy he gets tho so a lot of potential :D

Groribas, my fav girl:

pros: straightforward, realistic, very clear expectations, will not fuck around with you whatsoever like there is no mind games or anything here, will kill for you, rich and non materialistic so she’ll basically just let you do whatever with her money since she doesn t care about it, cares about her job but like...a normal amount. she absolutely has a good work/life balance, highly organized so she will not forget important dates, loyal af and will defend your honor under any circumstances, mean but in a funny way, a ton of fun to hang out with if you’re into that, no eyes so i dont have to worry abt eye contact ever

cons: extremely high expectations, like exhaustingly high, and not even a bit of flexibility there, if you dont meet the cut its a no, she’ll let you know and leave same day, she will also bully you, you need a thick skin and great sense of humor to survive, bad at feelings if you need emotional support???? go elsewhere, shes mega emotionally unavailable, will probably want to share bodies as a form of intimacy

overall its a solid 6.5/10 dateability for me i love the directness and no bs approach, we would def get along well. however, while im not sensitive, shes def gonna hit on some insecurities at some point and it will cause an argument lol. but i mean whatever. it happens. the body sharing would be an issue though, same reason i wouldnt be chill with having a symbiote despite being a major venom fucker. i need my space i cant deal with that. so thats a possible deal breaker if she couldnt get over that lol. and she wont, so we wouldnt work out. i wish it fuckin would tho😭😭😭 i would take whatever crumbs of attention she would be willing to give me

Melzalgald, my fav they/them bastard:

pros: amorphous and shapeshifting aka extremely attractive according to my taste in monsters, tall af but could chose to be a more reasonable survivable size lol, self contained and self-entertaining so they dont need a ton of attention to be happy, funny af, rich, will give you whatever you want and probably a bunch of shit you didnt know you wanted, very fun, built in friend group if you didnt already have friends, extremely emotionally intelligent and great people skills due to living in a collective, stupid af by choice, like some of em are very smart, but they dont claim that, will say fuck work and tell boros to eat shit to spend time with you, will kill for you as well, but only if you ask them to bc their first inclination is to just bother someone to death, very loyal, once they like you they like you really forever, it would take some pretty extreme circumstances to make them dislike you

cons: annoying af and its unavoidable, will talk over you, all of them at once will talk over you and do so loudly, no respect for personal space, they dont even know what that is, will probably accidentally manhandle you, they act stupid but arent so they can be manipulative, even if it isnt bad and they dont really mean to be, impulsive, forgetful of the needs of organic creatures so they will bother you at all hours of the day and night if you arent firm with boundaries, disgustingly extroverted and will bring randoms to your place without asking, or just...make new cluster members and you have to roll with it, will eat or absorb literally anything you have, will antagonize and bother you for fun, major jump scare risk since sometimes the forms are....fleshy

this ones hard for me like theyre hot af and i feel like they’d be super fun and good partners, but god....the noise. idk how long i could deal with that lol i dont like people in my house. it would drive me up the wall, but then again...i can simply kick them out when ive had enough. they arent projecting mental illness directly into my brain or requiring me to share a body sintelligento major plus. creepy thing/symbiote style hot monster without any of the invasiveness so tbh 8/10 dateability

some people date loud annoying extroverts who dont understand personal space that /arent/ rich, loyal, or emotionally intellegent so i’d be winning on a few different fronts lmao

#lord boros #geryuganshoop #groribas #melzalgald #dark matter thieves #opm #i put way too much thought into this after not thinking abt them in a long while #it was fun tho #Anonymous

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ravnicaforgoblins · 4 years ago

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Ravnica for Goblins

Goals

Ravnica is a big city. Ravnica is the Big City. The biggest, craziest, strangest, wildest, most awe-inspiring city ever built. It yields to no one, not even the Living Guildpact. They have power, yes, and their words carry with them the most powerful magic on this plane; but only within the written laws that have been in place for thousands of years. Ravnica is not a sandbox for Jace to mold to his will; it is a living, breathing organism that Jace is charged with looking after. Not to keep bullying the Mind Mage, but he has a pretty poor track record of doing a job that effectively boils down to “stay in one place and read books”.

At its core, Ravnica will always do what Ravnica has done for millennia. Mainly claw and scratch for any advantage in the ten-way Tug-Of-War that has been raging since the Guilds first found the end of a rope. The game never ends and never will. Temporary alliances can cause certain Guilds to pull together against other Guilds for a time, but the game always goes back to every Guild making snarky comments about the others eventually. In desperate situations against seemingly all-powerful new threats, the Guilds can put aside their differences to pull together for a time, but always with the understanding that once the threat is over they will all take their places again and resume where they left off. This can be frustrating for players used to or even enthralled by the idea of becoming the Savior(s) of the World.

Ravnica is not something that can be fixed because it doesn’t need to be. Barely-constrained chaos is and will always be the natural order of things. The Azorius Senate will come up with new laws. The Boros Legion will fight. House Dimir will poke its head into other people’s business. The Izzet League will invent. The Gruul Clans will resist. The Golgari Swarm will farm. The Simic Combine will experiment. The Orzhov Syndicate will scheme. The Selesnya Conclave will grow. The Cult of Rakdos will party. Your characters are never going to change any of these things, and that’s all right. Your goals should never be to change this world into something besides what it already is. Doing so would take away the fun of this crazy world.

So let’s talk about what kind of goals you, your characters, and your campaign should shoot for.

Short-Term Goals

If you’re just doing a Ravnica One Shot, or even if you just don’t know how much people are going to able to commit, Ravnica is full to the brim with possibilities. Literally, you can just draw Ravnica-themed MTG cards into a hand and piece together a story from whatever you get.

In these circumstances, your goals can be fairly short-term. Find someone/something, retrieve someone/something, stop someone/something, fight someone/something, do it, have a drink & celebrate. Your character goals can be as simple as just doing their jobs (Azorius maintaining order, Dimir finding information, Selesnya preserving life, Gruul rebelling against authority, Rakdos having a good time, etc). If you want something more personal, finding a connection between each of the party’s Guilds and the target is not only easy but fun to write.

The thing that makes Ravnica such a fun campaign atmosphere is the same thing that can make it frustrating; constant conflict. Any two Guilds can have a thousand reasons not to like each other, or, alternatively, a thousand reasons to work together. It can be differing Guild lifestyles, differences in opinion, shared interests, shared passions, old debts, past favors, or just trust/distrust in an individual. No two Guilds are required to get along, but at the same time, no two Guilds are required to hate each other. If your party has an Azorius Lawmage and a Rakdos Blood Witch, they can be at each other’s throats or they can be old friends who took different paths somewhere down the line. Your Guild is a choice, not a fate. Jace the Mind Mage was raised by Gruul. To this day, he still wears their tattoos.

*Be warned, once you’ve realized the unlimited possibilities this affords your character, you’re gonna want more.

Mid-Range Goals

If your group wants to commit to a longer stay in Ravnica, then it’s time to really flesh out your character and where they stand. It may even be necessary to retcon your characters into another Guild at this point, or begin a storyline to switch over. Anything can be fun short-term, but if you’re determined to go 6-12 levels in a Guild, you’ll want to be sure they are a good fit with your character. All ten of Ravnica’s Guilds come from Magic The Gathering’s 5-color wheel, coinciding with each possible two-color combination, meaning each Guild has common ground with others, but also important distinctions.

The Azorius, Boros, and Orzhov all have law & order as a central theme, but very different interpretations for it. The Azorius Senate write laws and prioritize order, whereas the Boros Legion enforce the laws but prioritize justice. The Orzhov Syndicate value neither and work to subvert each to their own ends.

Both the Simic Combine and Izzet League are built around creativity and invention. However, the Simic are much more rooted in biological (aka, walking, breathing) science, such as the Krasis iconic to their Guild. The Izzet are much more theoretical in their experimenting, endlessly curious to try something to see what will happen. They like playing with elements and physics. Simic experiments are long-term commitments, Izzet are spontaneous bursts of inspiration.

The Gruul, Golgari, Simic, and Selesnya Guilds all have a foundation in the natural world. Their interpretations of such are where the differences come out. Selesnyans build their lives around nurturing and revitalizing nature, while the Combine seeks to improve upon it. The Golgari apply the natural order to everything, including themselves, becoming a walking (possibly shambling) depiction of the plant life cycle in action. Life & death intertwined in an almost infinite cycle. And the Gruul Clans, while once the caretakers and preservers of Ravnica’s natural environments, have over time had those duties diverted from them into the Simic and Selesnya Guilds, leaving them to ferociously preserve the few untamed wilds Ravnica has left after 10,000 years of urbanization and to oppose any attempted encroachment on it from ambitious developers.

The Cult of Rakdos and Gruul Clans are both chaotic, violent, and revel in opposing authority. The Gruul do it out of anger and fairly justified resentment towards the city while the Cult does it literally for shits & giggles. Strangely enough, the savage rock-smashers can have more complexity to them than the daredevil street artists.

House Dimir and the Orzhov Syndicate both thrive on their dealings outside the law and under the table. Strangely enough, while both claim it’s just business, only House Dimir really stick by that code. They are the true embodiment of Neutral Evil, willing to stealing from anyone (including their own Guild members) for the right price. The Orzhov Syndicate, on the other hand, will exploit any loophole they can devise to avoid doing anything they don’t want. While the Dimir know to never be found near the scene of a crime, the Orzhov’s preferred method is to negotiate, lawyer, or bribe their way out of any & all consequences, and call themselves innocent. They are the literal worst.

Orzhov, Golgari, Rakdos, and Dimir all offer assassination services. The distinction comes from whether you want to send a message, erase an undesirable, make a spectacle, or never get caught; respectively.

For new players still learning about Ravnica, a distinct adventure focusing on each Guild is a great way to get comfortable with the setting. It helps how distinctive each Guild is from all the others; your players will quickly learn the differences between a Selesnyan Healer, a Simic Healer, and a Golgari Healer (Hint: one’s organic, one’s bioengineering, and one’s necromancy). By the time you’ve hit all ten, you should have a good foundation for the state of the city worked out for the campaign. Keeping all ten Guilds in line is an adventure all its own, just ask Jace Beleren. There’s always something going on.

Alternatively, you can aim for stopping plans originating from a single Guild. This city has a group for everyone, no matter how strange their beliefs, and the winds of change stop for no one, so taking down one problem is extremely unlikely to stop the higher purpose. There will always be another, bigger, problem. Bring in a spy, his handler steps in. Stop the handler, the cell leader gets involved. Defeat the cell leader, a cleaner gets called. Expose the cleaner, Assassins riding Nazgul descend upon thee. Kill that, and you become a problem for the entire organization.

The BBEG for a mid-range campaign can include a Guildmaster. Depending on which Guildmaster that is, the amount of preparation that will be required to triumph can range from “a shit ton” to “a fucking deus ex machina”. Regardless of Challenge Rating, they are going to be hard. If you think Zegana, Prime Speaker is going to battle without her personal entourage of gigantic Krasis, you are dead in the water. If you think Lazav the Multifarious will be a pushover once he has nowhere left to hide, you are falling right into his trap. If you think you can beat Borborygmos, Mightiest of the Mighty, by flying out of his range and chucking spells at his low AC, there’s a rock with your name on it. If you think Trostani, Chorus of the Conclave, are just a trio of singing tree-worshippers, they live inside the biggest sentient tree in existence.

If you think Niv-Mizzet is just a Dragon or Rakdos is just a Demon; you deserve the humiliating death they bestow you. Honestly, you want to do everything you can do avoid fighting those two if your campaign isn’t planning on going all the way. They are both top-tier monsters; manipulative, intelligent, durable, moody, and terrifyingly powerful. Even worse, they’re smug and masters of gloating. Beating a smug bastard feels awesome, but getting wrecked by them SUCKS.

Long-Haul Goals

If your party is determined to see a full campaign through start to finish, the stakes get bigger. To maintain conflict and challenge all the way to level 20, the threats reflect the amount of power you will be wielding. The Big Bads you are facing will be attempting to upset the chaotic status quo that has existed in Ravnica since its creation. If the Living Guildpact is around, someone is probably trying or has succeeded in killing/replacing them. If the Living Guildpact isn’t around, war has likely broken out in the streets. One Guild may be making a vie for power that will finally give them a conclusive edge over the other Guilds in the endless tug-of-war. Two or more Guilds may be pushing to eradicate several other Guilds whose antics and constant interference has been getting in their way for too long. Or an outside invading force may be materializing on Ravnica’s doorstep with the goal of either subjugating or erasing Ravnica itself. It’s the end of the world as we know it, and that’s not fine. Anything strong enough to challenge a planet-sized city of ten armies on their home turf is going to be, by necessity, seriously nasty.

The Living Guildpact makes for a good MacGuffin. It’s something supremely powerful but also complex enough to develop over a long period of time. They are the most powerful being on Ravnica, but becoming the LG is not as simple as poisoning Jace Beleren’s tea and taking unlimited power from his corpse. Going by the lore, losing one Guildpact will likely necessitate another Maze Run to choose the next. If you want to homebrew another method of transferring the power to an usurper, other problems present themselves. A rogue LG means nothing if the other Guilds refuse to comply. The power of the LG comes directly from Ravnica’s laws. They do not make the laws, they are the force that makes specific laws unbreakable. The process of putting new laws into effect requires the compliance of a recognized representative from every single Guild. Any would-be LG will need powerful influence within each of the other Guilds to make any creative changes to the Guildpact. They can’t just grab a Tom, Dick, or Sue from every Guild and make them say “you’re the Guildpact, Big Bad”. You’re looking for lieutenants powerful enough to be problematic on their own.

If your Big Bad is one or more Guilds going rogue, something will need to happen to upset the stalemate that’s existed among the Guilds for 10,000 years. If the angels of the Boros Legion could just kill Rakdos the Defiler, they would have done it 10,000 years ago, believe me. But not only have they failed to kill the Demon Lord of Riots, they have signed into an agreement with him & his in the name of actual peace. Some Guilds may be more inclined towards Big Bad behavior than others, but every Guild has the capacity to be the Big Bad.

A Big Bad Azorius will basically look like the Roman Empire.

A Big Bad Boros will basically be the Rapture. And/or the Crusades.

A Big Bad Dimir will look like 1984.

A Big Bad Golgari is a zombie apocalypse, plus Medusa.

A Big Bad Gruul is a Mad Max Thunderdome post-apocalypse.

A Big Bad Izzet is whatever Niv-Mizzet has been plotting towards for the last 16,768 years. Think The Matrix, but instead of machines, a Giant Ancient Dragon Wizard.

A Big Bad Orzhov is basically the Spanish Inquisition.

A Big Bad Rakdos is Rakdos actually acting like a Demon Lord.

A Big Bad Selesnya is the armies of the Elves & Ents from Lord of the Rings, and you’re the orcs at Saruman’s tower.

A Big Bad Simic is literally Godzilla.

Taking on something of this scale is going to require your character(s) to draw on every relationship they’ve built within every Guild. Whatever personal goals you might have started with are likely resolved; now you fight for Ravnica’s survival. You are fighting to restore this pain-in-the-ass city of constant conflict to the same barely-functioning status quo it started with. Because by now, you’ve kinda grown attached to it. The thing that makes Ravnica so good at drawing new players in is the fantastic variety of philosophies, lifestyles, and personalities that make up the city. It’s confusing to start, yes, but once you’ve been around long enough, a sort of natural order starts to become apparent. You stop seeing any Guild as good or evil and start seeing them as just different paths for people to take. As crazy as it might seem sometimes, the city works. It may not be perfect, but it will never be boring.

#ravnica for goblins #goblins #ravnica #dnd #D&D #dungeons and dragons #roleplaying #campaign #goals #guilds #living guildpact

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botan-shirabuki · 4 years ago

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Summer of Smut Writing Challenge: Waterlogged

Pairing: SLBP Fujibayashi Genya x MC (OC)

Theme: Day 9 - Stranded on a Boat Together

Summary: Genya being the king of diffusing stressful situations vol. 42069

Rating: NC-17/Explicit (for fingering, cuntylingus, and verrrry dirty talk)

Word Count: 5k

Notes: My 3rd entry in @voltage-vixen ‘s Summer of Smut challenge. I know...I know....this is SO late. but a series of consecutive events of life happening left me with barely any time to write, but I HAD to finish this because I love these two so much! I also thought the idea of a fic taking place in an amusement park, especially after the battle event. This one ended up being even longer than the first two so I hope it was worth the wait (if you were waiting...heh)!

Ao3: here

"Why do I have to carry her?"

"You're the one who wanted it so bad."

"Yeah, but you're the one who won her..."

Fuchi pouted and mumbled to herself as she adjusted the giant stuffed animal so that it was on her back and she held the arms crossed over her shoulders. Nothing in her life up to that point could have prepared her to think of the logistics of winning a stuffed animal at an amusement park. Earlier, she and Genya had been walking through a dazzling colorful alleyway full of various games with the prizes lined up against the walls and on the ceilings of each booth. Gen didn't put much thought into how exciting it must have all been for her until she started tugging at his arm while she excitedly squeaked and pointed at a giant stuffed dog that looked like Oboro. Fuchi insisted that they needed to get her, that it was the least they could do to commemorate her since they weren't allowed to bring her to the park themselves. Genya didn't really see the point in spending 500 yen to play, but at the same time, he couldn't help but find her enthusiasm for every single thing she came across wholly endearing. He got it in one easy game of ring toss, but the real prize was the look of joy on her face followed by that look melting into the realization that she would be carrying it for the rest of the night.

Now, they were walking towards the back of the park while Fuchi decided to keep her sulking to herself. Until then, they had gone on every ride they could that day. To Genya's surprise, she was quite the daredevil. Though, considering she had previously been overworking for a week straight, maybe that was her way of letting her hair down. According to the map of KoiLand he kept in his pocket, there were three more rides back there: two flat and one coaster. Unfortunately, the flat rides were kid specific so it looked like they would have to skip those. Genya squinted at the paper, trying to see it beneath the colorful flashing lights of surrounding attractions when Fuchi caught his attention again.

"Hey, Gen, what's that?" she nudged his thigh with her knee. When he looked up, he saw her gesturing towards a group of teenagers walking out of a ride's exit laughing while soaking wet. They walked towards a large booth with the words "DRYING STATION" above the door.

"Huh, what is that?" he drawled, looking back at the map. Apparently, his thumb had been covering this ride while he was looking at it earlier: The Raging River. And judging from the looks of it, it seemed like some sort of ride involving water. He told her what he was thinking and her face instantly lit back up as if she forgot that holding the stuffed dog ever bothered her.

"Can we go on?! I wanna see where the water comes from!" she was practically jogging in place with excitement, like she was ready to sprint towards the entrance with his say so. He couldn't not tease her.

He gave her a slow once over, "Keep bouncing like that and we can go wherever you want, gorgeous."

She stopped then, looking fake angry, though her blush gave her away, "Hey! I was being serious." He couldn't help but crack up at her expression, which made her face scrunch up even more. "What's so funny about--"

Her sentence got cut off by him tweaking her nose with his finger. "And I was being serious too. Come on, let's get a locker for our stuff." He grabbed her by the arm and led her towards the nearby storage STATION while she continued to vibrate with excitement.

....

Fuchi crossed her arms as she waited in the line. She had left her jacket in the locker along with her bag and Oboro-boro-ro-boro, and the queue had some pretty strong fans going even though the worst of the day's summer heat had passed. She found herself running her fingers over her goosebumps and shifting her weight from leg to leg. She could see some of the structure of the ride; it looked to be contained in a large half tube that snaked its way by the left side of the station, but she couldn't hear any train wheels. What were they about to get on?

"Hey," Fuchi jumped at the sound of Genya's voice right close to her ear from behind. His chin was planted on her shoulder. "You good? You look cold."

Before she could even answer, his hands were rubbing her bare arms. "I'm good now, thanks," her voice sounded so mousy just then. She often found herself baffled by how openly affectionate he was with her. Of course, she was proud to be with him, and she was more than willing to be equally affectionate. It just threw her off when he snuck up on her like that. And to top it off, he knew what it did to her when he spoke into her ear like that. She hoped he would get the hint that she didn't want that kind of action when they were waiting in a line with her simple reply.

As if he knew that and chose to ignore it, his hands slowed down until they stopped completely at her shoulders. His thumbs circled near the straps of her top. "You know, I was thinking of a form of payment."

Her eyebrows furrowed, "Payment? Payment for what?"

Mischief and mirth twinkled in his eyes, "For me winning you that prize."

"What, was me carrying her around not enough 'payment?'"

"Mm-mm," he hummed right in her ear, making her clench her arms that were still folded. "That was just common sense."

"How is that common--? What? I'm genuinely confused...and what are you doing now?" she looked down, noticing that his hands had slid off of her arms and were now trailing down the sides of her waist.

"Aah, my hands are so tired," he sighed, holding her close, "Think I need somewhere for them to rest."

Though Fuchi still had her questions, they managed to move with the line just like that. "And what exactly are your hands tired from?"

"Y'know," his hands slipped lower so his fingers were now dipping into the pockets of her jean shorts, "Winning you toys, carrying your food...helping you get out of your seatbelt when you thought it was stuck...."

"That was one time!" she knew he was laughing at the inflection of her voice. "And are you really tired from all of that?"

"Not me, just my hands. And yeah, they're soooo tired," he accentuated the word by squeezing her hips. "Can I rest them here, please?" His voice was so low it was barely above a whisper. "If you want me to, I'll just leave them right here. How's that?"

Fuchi closed her eyes, taking a pause before she answered, "Come on, Gen, play fair..."

"Whaddya mean by that?" he teased, keeping her close as they moved with the line again. "That a yes or no?"

It would have been torture to say no to him anyway, "Of course it's a yes."

They stayed like that until they made it to the ride station, save for Gen putting his hands on her upper arms to warm her up every once in a while. By the time they could see the actual trains, Fuchi's eyes lit back up with that same childlike excitement. The trains weren't any kind of typical cars; they were giant fake logs with the seats carved out in the middle, and the track was actually submerged in water.

"Oh this is so cool!" she tried her best to see where the track led by leaning over the rails. "Where does it go? What does it do?"

"That's for us to find out," he patted her back, "Come on, we're up next. They're all together."

Once the group in front of them started loading in, Fuchi walked towards the gate to watch them. She was quite shocked to see the four of them sit in a line straddled over one bench in the center of the car.

"Uhh, Gen? Why aren't there separate seats?"

"Just how these kinda rides are built," he shrugged as another group of soaked riders came into the station further back to get off the ride.

One of the ride operators turned to them, "Are you two going alone?"

"Sure are," Genya replied. Fuchi's mouth opened like she wanted to say something before she looked behind her to see another group of four casually watching them. In that moment, she realized they had probably been behind them this whole time and the harrowing reality of being seen hit her like a slap in the face.

"Um...we are?" she looked to Gen, her voice now much quieter.

"You wanna wait for another group of two?"

The automated gate opened before she could answer and her curiosity and excitement won over her modesty, as usual. She waved the concern away with a hand before they walked onto the loading dock. Genya stepped into the boat towards the back and reached out to take Fuchi's hand so she could follow. She initially sat at the front, excited to see everything, but she found herself being pulled back by her hips until she felt denim against her thighs.

"Gen! Hello?!" she exclaimed, looking back over her shoulder to see him smirking at her.

"Don't get all blushy on me, you're supposed to sit towards the back of these." His tone was so casual, but the force he used to pull her against him suggested amorous intent.

"Alright, you're cleared to go. Enjoy your ride!"

With the ride op's word, the log started to move out of the station. They bobbed along with the flow of the water until they reached the conveyor belt lift hill. It was alongside an elaborate prop cabin with a moving water mill among the trees. Fuchi ooh-d with excitement and started to bounce her legs when she noticed that his hands were splayed across her bare thighs. That realization made her vividly aware of how the angle of the lift hill had her back pressed into him.

"Hey...your hands look mighty comfortable there," she spoke over the clicks of the lift.

"They're still tired, remember?" he answered, squeezing her thighs and patting them to assure her that he didn't plan on moving them.

"Hmm, right, they're tired," her eyes narrowed, but she decided she'd play along. She squirmed against him until his hands stilled on her.

"Hey, you tryna start something on the ride? I'm pretty sure that's against the rules," his hands started kneading into her skin. She should have expected as much, but it did make her feel a little frisky.

"I'm not starting anything, I'm only finishing-- Aah!" she squealed when the lift ended and they were dropped off into the flume track with a decent splash that hit both of them. They both took a moment to laugh in surprise, moving half-soaked locks of hair out of their faces as the log made its way down the winding course through the trees.

The ride itself was quite long. While there hadn't been anything particularly thrilling other than the fun of watching the scenery and the view of the rest of the park lit up against the setting sun, Fuchi still found her heart racing. Genya's hands on her thighs had started to wander around her, one sliding up to hold her waist while the other crept up her leg to hold on to her hip. She felt his lips casually brush the nape of her neck and she knew right then without a doubt that he was making some kind of move.

"Mm, you know there's other people on this ride, right?" she protested, knowing her argument was weak right when it left her mouth. She could feel her heartbeat quicken as his hand on her waist moved to squeeze at her ribcage just beneath the wire of her bra.

"Yup, and they'd all kill to have their hands on you, gorgeous," he murmured in her ear, just like before in the line; except this time, there was no mistaking how turned on he had her.

"You don't know that..." her voice trailed off when she noticed his hand was now between her parted legs, rubbing over the central seam of her shorts. She let out a small whine, "Come on, Gen, why now?"

"There isn't a better time than the present. Especially when I've got you all to myself." As they sailed through a small helix, Genya grazed her earlobe with his teeth, "Say, after we get off of this, why don't I give you something else to ride?" He punctuated his suggestion by groping her hip again.

Before she could answer him, apart from a notably enthusiastic moan, a passing seemingly innocent waterfall suddenly blasted them with a spray of water, even stronger than the first. Fuchi shrieked in surprise, but Genya didn't miss a beat.

"Heyy, see? You're already wet now," he teased her again, now licking at the droplets of water that trailed down the column of her neck. "So whaddya say, hm?"

Fuchi pushed her wet hair out of her face and started to rock back into him, "Honestly, keep that up and you can have whatever you want."

"Whatever I want..." he growled, confirming her words before planting shameless open-mouth kisses beneath her ear. She responded by reaching back to hold his head there, her fingers tangling into his darkened locks. His hands both held her hips against him as she rocked them between him and the seat, seeking any kind of relief from the teasing arousal building up inside her. The track doubled down into a long, dark tunnel. The two small pops of airtime followed by a dark tunnel only further turned up the heat. One of Genya's hands shamelessly grabbed one of her breasts, groping it through her top. In response, Fuchi turned her head towards him to capture his mouth in a kiss. While the angle was a little awkward, their tongues brushed together to confirm what they intended to do once the ride was done. Her free hand reached back to grip his thigh in return and her hips continued their search for any kind of friction as their faces became visible again once they neared the end of the tunnel.

Fuchi smiled at him, her eyes hazy in the dim light, "I never thought I'd be so excited to get off one of these things."

"The feeling's mutual, gorgeous." The look in his eyes made her swoon. He looked at her like she was his whole universe, but at the same time, he was clearly sizing her up like he was thinking about how exactly he wanted her later. She turned her head back forward as he started to pepper her neck and shoulder with kisses again, when she realized where they were.

The log had come to a stop right close to the exit of the tunnel which led to the lift hill for the final drop. There was a section of water that seemed like it was to push the log up onto the lift, but they had stopped a few meters short of it. They waited there for a few minutes, still kissing and caressing until Fuchi finally spoke up.

"Hey, how long have we been sitting here?"

His lips left her neck with a slight pop, "What's that?"

"I swear we've been sitting here for awhile now."

Looking ahead for himself, Genya noticed that indeed, they weren't going anywhere even despite the water flowing around them. On top of that, the lift hill wasn't moving at all either. He looked behind them and saw a tiny blip of another log outside the other end of the tunnel, which didn't seem to move any closer to them. "Looks like everything's stopped."

"Attention riders," an awkwardly uncertain voice rang from a nearby loudspeaker, "The ride has been stopped, but please remain seated until further instructions are given.

Fuchi's mouth dropped open in shock. "What? Come on!" She threw her hands in the air in frustration. "Of course this would happen to us right now."

"Well damn," Genya sighed as she sat up to keep ranting. He felt noticeably more cold and wet once she scooted off of him.

"Yeah damn! We were so close to the end, I know it!" She got up on her knees at the front of the vehicle and tried to look up to see what was in the lift hill. There was one group of riders almost at the top from the looks of it.

"Heh, maybe that's not so bad," he drawled behind her, a teasing nature in his voice.

She turned back to narrow her eyes at him. "Why the sudden switch? You just said you couldn't wait to get off of this."

"I did," he said, calm as ever as he scooted up so he was directly behind her again. "But look on the bright side, gorgeous. I already have you all alone right now."

"Oh?" her voice dropped as she felt his hands gliding up her legs again.

"Oh yeah," his voice was gravelly by the time he reached the fraying material of her shorts. "In fact, I think you ought to take these off. I know how much you don't like wearing wet clothes."

"You're joking," Fuchi retorted, but her voice sounded just as heady as his.

"Fuchi when have I ever joked with you?" the grin on his face betrayed him as he gripped the cusps of her ass cheeks, pulling them even further out of the cutoffs.

A giggle bubbled out from her mouth. "I think that right there counts."

He answered with a small chuckle of his own before he hooked his fingers in her belt loops. "May I?"

She readjusted her knees on the seat, "Only if you say please."

With the belt loops, he pulled her hips closer to him, "Please, Fuchi? Pretty please?" he groaned, nuzzling his cheek into the damp denim before planting a kiss against her skin. "Please let me taste it."

She already had them unbuttoned before he finished. "Damn. Well since you asked so nicely," she helped him pull them down over her hips. "You sounded a little desperate though, not gonna lie."

"There's no shame in begging for some-- Goddamn, that sight never gets old," Genya breathed once her shorts dropped to her knees. She giggled as he gathered the back of her panties and tugged them gently upward until he could see the outline of her lips in the dim light. "Hmm, just as I figured. You're soaked all the way through," he noted, rubbing her clit through the thin cotton until he heard her muffling a moan behind her hand. "No need to be shy y'know," he chided her, abruptly slapping her ass so she would gasp aloud.

"Hey!" She hissed, hitting his shoulder with her sneaker. "I don't know if you noticed, but we're in a tunnel. That's gonna echo!"

"Damn, what's a guy gotta do to get you to relax?" Genya mumbled, still holding her in place.

"Relax? We're doing this while stuck on a-- fuck!" Fuchi gasped again when he pulled her panties aside and sucked her clit into his mouth. He worked her expertly with his tongue until her mouth was hanging open.

"I won't fuck you unless you relax," he purred once he pulled away from her so he could pull her panties down to pool at her knees along with her shorts. "When you get all uppity, you start closing up on me, y'know." He started rubbing her again with one hand while the other spread her lips open so he could view the progression of her arousal. "And you're already so damn tight to begin with...makes it an impossible fit."

Fuchi felt her face heating up at his dirty talk, "You're gonna fuck me on here?" She had tried her best to retaliate, but her voice was so breathy she gave up on it.

He was too busy licking at her all up and down to initially answer. "Probably, if they leave us here long enough," he said as he pulled away again to look at her now glistening folds. "Nothin' in this world could keep me from this pussy for that long." He dipped his tongue into her entrance and moaned at the taste before sucking her back into his mouth until he heard her audibly panting, still trying to wrangle her sounds of pleasure in her throat.

"C'mon, gorgeous, l can barely hear you over all this water," he teased her as he slipped one finger into her. "Really wanna hear how me fucking you on my fingers makes you feel, babe..."

"Hahh...oh...it feels good..." she managed to whimper, looking back to see his eyes drinking up all of her form as his digit pumped in and out of her. "Add another one?"

She felt him leaving her and watched him lick his index finger before generously wetting the middle as well. "No problem," he smirked before slowly sinking the two fingers in together. He fucked her like that for a good moment, until she started rocking back and forth in sync with him. "Attagirl, that's more like it. See? I can feel you opening up around me..." He playfully bit her on the right ass cheek while he started to pump deeper.

"Yes, Gen....yesssss it feels so good..." she was slowly getting braver with her vocals. Either that, or the way he curved his fingers just how she liked made her forget to keep quiet. "Yes! Ahh, add another finger!"

"Say please." His hand in her froze; his voice was suddenly serious and steely, with a sharp edge like a blade.

"Aaah, fuck off!" she whined once he stopped moving.

"Not so fun when the tables turn on ya, huh?" Genya smirked before spanking her harshly on both cheeks, "Now say please like you mean it."

Fuchi made meaningful eye contact with him, "Gen, please put another finger inside of me," she pleaded, trying to fuck herself slowly, tantalizingly, on his still fingers. "How else am I supposed to prepare myself for your massive dick?"

"Ooh, she took the logical route," he chuckled before giving her the satisfaction of his ring finger sliding in. "You're still a brat though."

"I did what you asked!" she cried out in the middle of a long-winded moan. She felt him stand up behind her and smack her ass one last time before he was pressed all the way up against her back. A solid mass of body heat beneath damp clothes punctuated by his dick straining against her ass through his pants.

"All that talking again. Just hush up and let me make you cum, 'kay?" He was back in her ear, sending a pleasant shiver through her when he gently blew a breeze on her wet neck. "You're so fucking sexy just like this. I really could just fuck you right in here."

"Oh yeah?" she raised an eyebrow before spitting on her fingers so she could properly touch herself long with him. "Do it then...fuck me..." Her voice had that edge to it that she often got when she knew she was close to cumming. The sounds of their hands working had begun to compete with the sound of the water around them.

"I dunno..." His voice grew grittier as his fingers worked into her faster, "where would I be able to cum?"

"I'd take it! Fuck! You know I'd take it all!" she panted, her hand doing its best to keep up with the pace of his.

"Mmm, I know you would. Just wanted to hear you say it. Because I know how crazy thinking about that makes you." His free hand let go of her hip to plunge down into the front of her top, grabbing at her bare tit and rolling the nipple between his fingers. "Come on, gorgeous, I wanna hear you cum. You're so close, let me hear how bad you want it..."

"Gen! I want it I want it I want it....ahh!" her orgasm was much closer than she realized. It came to her quickly, making her jump slightly and lean over the front of the log to seek purchase in the grooves of the fake bark. She surprised herself with how loud she cried out at the end. She let him fuck her through it until his fingers left her, rubbing slick over her clit until she was shaking again.

"That's it, babe...Fuck, you got so tight around my fingers just then," Genya groaned before he enveloped the aforementioned fingers in mouth. Fuchi watched him suck his fingers clean until he dropped back into the seat, taking his hand from her shirt along with him. He wrapped his arm around her hips and crashed his face into the swell of her ass cheek so he could kiss and suckle at it until he left a nice dark mark. All while he used his opposing hand to begin unbuttoning his pants and palming at his erection. "Tell me where you want this dick," He murmured into her skin, though she managed to hear it.

"I want that beautiful dick right here and right now on this boat," she said earnestly, still raring to go after her orgasm.

Genya chuckled, peppering her hickey with kisses, "Not necessarily what I was asking but I love that energy."

Fuchi tilted her head and ran her hand through his hair to push his head back up off of her, catching his full attention. "Well then where do you want it?" she asked, taking her hand out of his hair to casually pat both of her holes. Gen stared at her with his eyebrows raised in shocked silence. The pause broke when Fuchi broke out in laughter, which made him laugh again, in turn. It never ceased to amaze him how quickly they could flip the script on each other.

"Tease," he laughed, standing back up to kiss her on her shoulder. She caught him by the chin and kissed him on the lips, holding him there until she felt something hot, hard, slick, and all too familiar rubbing against her sex. "I think I know what I want," he breathed against her lips. She bit his lower lip, urging him on. He had just lined up with her when they heard from the speakers above.

"Attention riders, good news! The ride is totally fine and ready to go. There had been a loose article detected by the ride's censors and it has been fished out and now the ride is cleared. We do apologize for the inconvenience and are offering free meal vouchers after the ride is done. Thank you all for waiting, the ride will start back up in a few minutes."

"Come on," Genya muttered, looking up at the speaker. "Right when we were gonna--"

"What a MOTHERFUCKER!" Fuchi slammed her hands against the vehicle. "First you make us stop here, then once we're about to get serious, it's time to go again? This ride hates me, bro, I swear!"

Her bout of rage softened the sting of being interrupted, bringing a smile to his face. He couldn't help but tease her again, "Thought this was what you wanted in the first place?"

Fuchi stammered, so frustrated, her words clogged in her mouth. "Maybe if they had waited like, five more minutes. Actually, you know what? Get back here, let's do it while we have a chance."

"'m afraid I'll have to turn that offer down," he shrugged, having just finished fitting his still raging boner back into his pants. "You and I both know there's no stopping once we get started."

"True..." she deflated a little, letting him pull her underwear and shorts back on for her before buttoning them up herself and sitting back down properly in the seat. "I'm still mad though. Fuming, even. So much so that I just might have to take it out on you."

"I'm looking forward to it, gorgeous," he said, pulling her back by her waist so she was snug against him again. He happened to smack her thighs in perfect timing with the hiss of the brakes letting them free and propelling them out of the tunnel and onto the lift hill. "And if we get stuck again, I'm fucking you right here!" he proclaimed over the loud clacking of the chain lift.

The actual final drop of the ride ended up being pretty anticlimactic, though they did get thoroughly soaked thanks to a giant splashdown at the end of it. They were still laughing and pushing dripping wet locks out of their faces as they got off the ride and left the station. They were just outside the nearby gift shop when Fuchi turned around.

"Maybe we should dry off and go get-- Oh, hello..." she was sidetracked by the sight of Genya, his hair and clothes still drenched. The collar of his shirt was low enough that she could see nearby lights glistening on his wet skin. The material of it was thin enough that it clung flawlessly to each ripple of muscle on his torso. He flexed his chest when her hand instinctively ran across his diamond hard nipples that poked through.

"I could have sworn you said you were angry bout something earlier," his voice was low and full of promise.

"I think I just remembered what it was. Now I'm mad again," she said, completely hypnotized by the blue and pink lights dancing across the smooth planes of his dripping wet pecs. "Maybe help me express my anger once we get back to the car?"

"There's actually a quiet little construction area behind the ride. If you're mad enough for that."

"I am," she nodded, holding her hand out for him to take so he could lead her there. "And good on it for being quiet. I'm pretty aggy, don't want anyone else seeing that."

Genya smirked as he led the way. "I know you don't."

#slbp genya #summer of smut #summer of smut writing challenge #fujibayashi genya #MC: Fuchi #my writing #slbp fanfic

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gofancyninjaworld · 5 years ago

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OPM in 2019, part 2

Yup, this was all too long, so I now have to attend to the manga. This year, Murata kept his promise from 2018 to deliver regular chapters. Even the passing of his father only made him take a few weeks off.

By the numbers. This year, Murata delivered 24 updates consisting of 624 pages. It may not be the banner year of 2017 2018, but it still averages out at more than 50 pages a month. He also drew 113 pages for volume releases in extra chapters, volume-only content and chapter redraws. We thank you for your hard work, Mr. Murata!

As to the words and pictures, much more below the cut!

beautiful and poignant -- probably the best cover this year.

Be warned: this contains major plot spoilers

Broad Strokes

Last year focussed on the Hero Association response to the Monster Association, gathering up heroes, sorting out battle plans and sending them into the field. In the course of the war effort, the characters whom we’ve been following most consistently all got parked in one place or another. We turned decisively away from Saitama, Genos, Garou, Fubuki, Bang, and King to focus on what the other heroes were doing, getting to know many more of them.

This year, we’ve seen the first triumphant contact the heroes made gradually be eroded away as the monsters launch their counter-attack and one by one the parked characters have been brought back into the story to varying effect.

2020 is promising to be the showdown year that will give us the final denouement, but I can’t promise that. What I can promise is a closer look at the major themes of 2019.

Orochi

From half-assed plot to bad-ass plan

The first big thing is just how important Monster King Orochi has been to the story. More specifically, it's crazy how vital a linchpin he has been to Psykos’s humanity extermination plan. The webcomic that doesn’t have Orochi makes her plan a sick joke. Like, seriously, how was Psykos planning to take over the world? In the webcomic, if things had gone to plan and she'd gotten rid of the heroes sent to the Monster Association, what then? Not enough monsters to kill billions of people and no way to get the monsters that she does have there. Monsters are also terribly uncooperative and undisciplined. The long-term cooperation to kill billions of people just isn’t going to happen -- without the clear, limited goal that killing Class S heroes was, they’ll just split up. Society wasn't about to fall into a weeping puddle: we’ve seen both in the manga and the webcomic that there are loads of strong people, and that people are resilient and adaptable. It's like, that was a total idiot plot from the outset. It’d end in failure as society adapted faster than the bickering monsters (those that didn’t leave) appreciated.

yeah, you and what army?

On the other hand, Monster King Orochi makes Pyskos's dream a credible reality. First, thanks to him, she got the cooperation of monsters like Elder Centipede, who was particularly important in the lead up to the Monster Association’s declaration of war. It dug enough tunnels that monsters could appear simultaneously in multiple cities throughout the world. Second, thanks to Orochi, she got millions of monster cells which meant that huge chunks of the population could be simultaneously monsterised in multiple locations, each able to help kill off the rest of humanity. Their dry run two days previous to the current manga events confirmed that humanity simply couldn't cope with monsters showing up in so many places at once and yes, now they had a shot. They could kill off the powerful organised heroes and then quickly make civilised life impossible before any credible fight back could be organised.

This plan works.

when you realise that it’d only take a couple of hours to replenish the Monster Association’s forces

If that's all Orochi could do, it'd be plenty. It made a bad, half-assed idiot plot into a real threat. But that's not all. He's a crazy powerful monster, one Psykos was counting on to deal the death blow to the most powerful heroes, especially Tatsumaki.

Unfortunately for Psykos, Saitama seems to have given Orochi a bad case of the deads. And Amai Mask seems to have destroyed her precious store of monster cells. Unless she have a back up depot of monster cells, her humanity extermination plan has hit a real snag. Many fans do hold out hope that Orochi isn't dead-dead and may Awaken to be real trouble. But we'll see.

Acceptance

Speaking of Saitama and Orochi, something very important happened to Saitama’s character development that simply hasn’t happened yet in the webcomic. Saitama accepted that yes, he’s just the strongest being alive.

We’ve seen Saitama struggle with not finding a worthy challenge. He has bargained with it, dreaming of being weak enough to find the Subterraneans a threat. He has been angry about it, shouting his outrage when Vaccineman died after one hit. He has been depressed about it; we saw his whole collapse in the wake of the Superfight which led him to opening up to King. And now, when he heard Orochi trying to introduce himself, he realised that this was just another useless blowhard like the jerk who’d kicked him to the moon and cut it short. ‘What makes you so special?’ ‘Come at me then, but I’m expecting nothing.’

all according to expectation

It’s so rare to see Saitama show any character development, so this moment, small as it is, is really a profound step forward for the character. We will see what happens as a result in chapters to come.

Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity

Good luck that is. And that’s been shining on Psykos despite the setback of losing Orochi. All the work we’ve seen her put in since chapter 57, observing heroes, sending out monsters to attack them and then seeing how they respond, has finally paid off.

Between chapters 94 and 112, the manga really showed us precisely why the Class S heroes were so respected as the ultimate answer to the worst of the worst monsters.

And now, by carefully siccing the right super-powerful monster on hero, Psykos has achieved what looked impossible: defeat Class S heroes en masse.

and bad luck is what happens when lack of preparation meets a challenge

It’s perfect, save monsters have a long-documented love of savouring their prey and aren’t killing the heroes as fast as they should. Silly things: they leave the window open to rescue.

Machinations

A cyborg makes wild accusations...

Holy moly, has any hero’s stock risen and sunk as fast as Drive Knight’s has? In the space of a month, two updates, this enigmatic hero went from the new darling of the fandom to at best, a very self-interested ‘hero’ and at worst, the very traitor Metal Knight warned Child Emperor about.

We’ve known nothing about Drive Knight, what he did and just why he had a top ten ranking. Well, we got a great masterclass in why when with a fantastic combination of power and guile, he defeated the cadre Nyan, making him the first hero other than Saitama to do so. In fact Drive Knight is so polished in both the type of technology he has and the fluency with which he wields it that he makes Genos look like a glorified garage project. Oh wait... that’s accurate, isn’t it?

looking like Boros’s long-lost cousin, Drive Knight’s gold splendour

It’s what Drive Knight did next that set audiences against him. First, we learned that he watched the support heroes get cut down while he formulated the perfect plan. Okay, maybe he’s just a cold operator. Second, the terrifying efficiency with which he pumped Sekingar for information on the vulnerability of the Hero Association, then failed to protect him when G-5 showed up to stop Sekingar from reporting back to the Hero Association. Third, while we’ve known that Drive Knight is no fan of Metal Knight, accusing the latter of deliberately supplying the Monster Association is another story. It has left us wondering whether Drive Knight is simply paranoid -- or is looking to deflect suspicion from himself. What is not in question is that there really is a visitor from The Organisation harvesting the very data Drive Knight is worried about for the very purposes he outlines.

Drive Knight did not look best pleased when Genos intervened in affairs and destroyed G-5, but handed over (or cut his losses?) peaceably enough. For some reason, Drive Knight still seems to think that Genos is on his side, still going ‘we’ and making a distinction between them and the rest of humanity when explaining his desire to leave with Nyan. Why?

We have no idea when Drive Knight will reappear or quite what side he’s on, but one thing is for sure: he’s a powerful mover in this world and is bound to pose some dread challenge when he does.

...but a greedy old man looks set to pay dearly

Top shadenfreude for me: if G5 didn't successfully remotely transmit everything it'd learned about the Metal Knight back, then Bofoi will be in the painful position of having to acknowledge that Genos got his wrinkly little nuts out of the fire. Yup, that guy Bofoi refused to help and left to die the first time he met. That guy he started a whispering campaign against at the Hero Association. That one.

By the time Sekingar gets back and gives his story, Dr Bofoi will have most of the story. Once Child Emperor reports in, Bofoi will have put all the bits together. He’ll understand that he dodged a very large bullet as The Organisation had successfully hacked into his robot. And he was lucky their emissary didn't live to report its findings.

How did Bofoi get in this shitty position? By getting greedy. He was so desperate to get a sample of Elder Centipede’s armour that he had his robot cling on and get carried into the Monster Association base. And then let it sit and listen in. He didn’t budget on Orochi being able to disable the robot before he could trigger its self-destruct sequence.

unfortunately for Bofoi, the Monster Association isn’t quite as selfish as he is and had no problem letting The Organisation harvest what it could of the machine they couldn’t themselves use.

It’s super unlikely that the Hero Association will take Drive Knight’s words uncritically, but they’re not stupid people -- they’ll understand that a major security breach has occurred. Suffer a little, Dr. Bofoi.

Old Players, New Roles

This year we have had no new characters introduced. But we have had cause to re-evaluate several that we thought we knew.

Sekingar was totally the breakout star here, surprising himself probably more than anyone else in finding that he truly did have what it took to be a hero. I won’t go into it, full breakdown here. What I will say is that unlike someone like Suiryu, who is just an ordinary person, Sekingar is very highly placed within the Hero Association and looks set to be promoted further. What he has to say and enact about the way heroes operate WILL have a disproportionate effect on the Hero Association, its future and maybe humanity’s safety.

heroism is what you find when there are no good options but you do the right thing anyway

Genos continued to develop this year. Last fight, he’d been devastated at not having been able to save any heroes. This time out, saving people and showing a real resolve to take the fight to the monsters is front and centre of his actions, finally ending the hostage rescue part of the Hero Association plans.

it’s one thing to see a hero standing on top of a dead monster, but seeing this tiny guy on an armoured carrier and knowing that he could kill everybody in the convoy effortlessly did more to sell the insanity of Class S to me than many monster fights could. No wonder ordinary men call them monsters.

Two big changes from the webcomic to the manga have been first, splitting Genos off from the rest so he has to act out of his own heart rather than being carried along/supported by others. And second, giving him information about the monsters so he can descend to Hell with open eyes. If any webcomic readers thought that Genos was being impulsive and naive when he took on the cadres rather than brave, the manga decisively lays that to rest. This boy is truly courageous.

Finally, the hero most known for scheming to lord it over others (in order to feel better about herself), Fubuki, closed out the year by showing an amazing side to her.

She’s long hated dealing with strong monsters and Overgrown Pochi is her worst nightmare -- a true terror of a monster. She feels it all: inadequate, scared, frustrated, vulnerable. Accepts that she’s almost certainly going to die. And then uses her delusion of leading Bang and Bomb as a source of strength to bolster their bodies and protect them from harm for long enough for them to counter attack.

The bloodshot eye, the veins standing proud out of the sheer effort wrung out of her, the blood running down her face as she faces the monster. No fucks given about decorum or looks: she’s going down swinging. Bravo!

Oh yeah, and Garou woke up. He seems a bit mad.

the second-best cover of 2019

#OPM #meta #2019 review #manga #heroes #Orochi #Psykos #Saitama #Drive Knight #Metal Knight #Dr Bofoi #Genos #Sekingar #Fubuki #Bang #Bomb #Garou #we wait to see what 2020 will bring

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artificialqueens · 6 years ago

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Onsra (Branjie) - Mac

AN: Hi, hello, yes. This is the fic I mentioned was very stream of consciousness and not all-together a polished masterpiece. I tried something a little new with the writing style. I asked around to see if people were interested, and I posted this to AO3 as well, and people encouraged me to post it here. (So, here is another installment of the Foreign Word Fics, where I write a fic based off a word that has no english translation.)

Summary: Onsra (Boro language of India) – That bittersweet feeling of loving for the last time — in other words, that feeling you get when you know a love won’t last.

Brooke and Vanjie broke up a few months ago. Neither of them took it particularly well. So when they find themselves touring for three months, they fall into old patterns that aren’t healthy for either of them.

They had tried once. Right after the show finished taping, they had tried. It was a strange time, with Vanessa getting booked left and right, still riding high from her season 10 fame, and Brooke doing her usual gigs, with the cast list for Season 11 not revealed yet. They found comfort in the chaos. Traveling and high off of first love, they didn’t think about anything else. They didn’t think about the time they had left. They thought about the now, and their hands and lips and brains would just have to catch up, they reasoned.

They tried to make it work. Really, they had. Brock had done the damn thing. The thing he had been scared of the most. But in the end, it was Jose that pulled away. As soon as Brock had mentioned their changing circumstances with the show coming out, Jose had made up his mind.

They wanted different things. He would say.

They had different views. He would say.

They were so in love that it scared the both of them shitless.

He wouldn’t say.

They broke up. And it sucked. And it was hard.

And maybe the hardest part was that it wasn’t impossible. Brock got up in the morning. He brushed his hair. He showered. He went to his shows. He went to sleep.

It only really hurt when he breathed.

It was mainly because he didn’t let himself really process the breakup. He had said he wanted to try, but Jose wouldn’t listen.

If Brock didn’t think about it, it didn’t matter.

He was the Ice Queen for a reason, right?

He didn’t let things get to him, right?

He didn’t let people get to him, right?

He didn’t let the love of his life slip away.

Right?

Jose was not fine.

There was a hole in his chest.

He felt like everyone could see. And maybe when he cried uncontrollably in two bars in one night, they could. But his friends had all told him he looked fine, from the outside at least. He could smile and he could perform. And he could pretend the hole in his chest was just for decoration.

Jose would exhaust himself every day, so when he finally slept it was dreamless. He doesn’t think he could have survived if even in sleep he were accosted with that face. That face he had grown so used to seeing. Via facetime, or on Instagram, or in his memories.

They were both hurting. They had both tried and failed to get over it. So, when they found themselves falling into similar patterns, and falling into bed together, neither of them stopped to ask if it was a good idea.

It was decidedly not.

One night on tour together turned into two weeks, turned into a month, turned into the worst decision either of them had ever made.

They had never said that important four-letter word to each other. Well, at least not while they were both conscious and aware. Brock had whispered it into Jose’s hair in his queen-sized bed in Canada, way too early to be considered normal.

Jose had said it to Brock’s door, as it shut in his face for a final time.

It didn’t matter now. But maybe it should.

Tour was long, and there was plenty of time to talk, so they didn’t. And they didn’t. And Nina would nag Brock for a month to open his mouth in a way that wasn’t sexual. But Brock couldn’t bring himself to ruin what they had going. He knew if they talked about it, it would stop. The closeness, the companionship, the lo-

So, Brock was selfishly clinging to a drowning ship, in an attempt to save his own heart. At least that is what he told himself. He was the selfish one who couldn’t let shit go. He was the bad guy. Brock was always the bad guy.

But avoiding a topic for more than a month only leads to tension, and there is only so much tension that can be fucked out of two people.

So, Jose mentions it.

They are lying in Brock’s bunk on the bus, it is way too small for two people, especially one tall ass Canadian with limbs the length of the Nile. But ever since that first night, they just fall into place. Limbs accustomed to the slight stretch so they can both fit comfortably wrapped around each other. Jose’s head fitting to Brock’s neck like it was always meant to.

Jose doesn’t want to bring it up, but it’s been a month, and they have been acting like a couple, and they’ve been sleeping together, and they still lo-

So, he brings it up.

“Brock?” The older man tilts his head down to meet Jose’s eyes. “What are we doing?”

As soon as the words leave his lips in a whisper, he feels Brock’s chest tense up and relax at the same time.

“I don’t know.”

It wasn’t an answer in so many words. But the silence between the syllables served enough of an answer to make Jose’s chest ache. The hole that had been patched over with quick kisses in rehearsal and nights of cuddling and hair stroking and hand holding and pretending they were happy, suddenly flared up again. And Jose supposes that band-aids were never really a cure after all.

He tries to think of something else to say, anything else to say. He keeps coming up with three words. But he won’t whisper them in the dark, or to a closed door. Not this time. He won’t say them at all. He will roll out of bed in the morning and go back to his own bunk. He will dance and perform like his heart isn’t two feet away from him on stage. He will keep going. Because he has to.

And he will try and fail to stop sleeping with Brock.

He reasons with himself that sometimes he just misses his heart and needs to be close to it.

He always sleeps better next to it.

Brock would keep going. Pretending he was fine sleeping alone. His bunk always felt too small with just him in it, so how was he supposed to explain why now it felt too big. There was no warmth anymore. Just the sheets that smelled like something was missing. He didn’t even know something could smell like a lack of something, but Jose always made the impossible that much more real, so Brock really shouldn’t have been surprised.

He let Jose come back, time and time again. They would do the dance of “will they won’t they” knowing the outcome would stay the same. It was like reading a book you already knew the ending to, if the book was your heart, and also on fire.

It would have to come to an end at some point. There was bound to be an explosion of feeling, and a wreck of emotion. There had to be. There was no other way.

But for now, it was just this.

This limbo.

This in-between heartbreak, and lust, and lo-

#rpdr fanfiction #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #branjie #angst #foreign word fics #onsra #canon compliant #mac #fwf by mac

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qveenofthorns · 7 years ago

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Brave, gentle, strong: there is only one (no really—I checked)

“When you’re old enough, I will make you a match with a high lord who’s worthy of you, someone brave and gentle and strong.” – Eddard Stark, Sansa III, AGOT

I’ve seen a lot of metas about textual evidence for Sandor being the BGS That Was Promised™, and I started wondering if there are any other candidates. What if we’re all so ~blinded~ by our ship that we missed something else right in front of us? I used A Search of Ice and Fire to check every single Sansa/Alayne chapter for these words (and variations of them) to see if she thinks of anyone else using all of these terms.

Here are all of the of the uses sorted by character/chronologically (excluding the times she tells Sweetrobin that he’s brave and strong or she tells herself to be brave like Robb):

Joffrey

1. “It was a great honor to ride with the queen, and besides, Prince Joffrey might be there. Her betrothed. Just thinking it made her feel a strange fluttering inside, even though they were not to marry for years and years. Sansa did not really know Joffrey yet, but she was already in love with him. He was all she ever dreamt her prince should be, tall and handsome and strong, with hair like gold.” Sansa I, AGOT

Okay, so I think we can discount this one given the context of Ned’s “brave and gentle and strong” quote, but I really wanted to cover all the bases. It’s also a pretty superficial assessment, moulding him to fit the part in which she’s cast him based on the songs.

Barristan Selmy

1. “One knight wore an intricate suit of white enameled scales, brilliant as a field of new-fallen snow, with silver chasings and clasps that glittered in the sun. When he removed his helm, Sansa saw that he was an old man with hair as pale as his armor, yet he seemed strong and graceful for all that. From his shoulders hung the pure white cloak of the Kingsguard.” Sansa I, AGOT

This one is also an extremely obvious no, though it is still interesting. Despite being old, he seems like a knight from the songs and we see the Kingsguard cloak for the first time in a Sansa POV.

Sandor

1. “She stepped backward and bumped into someone. Strong hands grasped her by the shoulders, and for a moment Sansa thought it was her father, but when she turned, it was the burned face of Sandor Clegane looking down at her, his mouth twisted in a terrible mockery of a smile.” Sansa I, AGOT

This is after she first sees Ser Ilyn Payne, whom she finds terrifying. Her initial response to Sandor’s touch is positive and this won’t be the last time she backs into him when she’s afraid.

2. “Sandor Clegane scooped her up around the waist and lifted her off the featherbed as she struggled feebly. Her blanket fell to the floor. Underneath she only had a thin bed gown to cover her nakedness. ‘Do as you’re bid, child,’ Clegane said. ‘Dress.’ He pushed her toward her wardrobe, almost gently.” Sansa VI, AGOT

This is the first BGS occurrence since her conversation with Ned. She’s depressed and suicidal and hasn’t bathed in who-knows-how-long after his death. Joffrey has demanded she get dressed and bathe or else “his Hound” will do it for her. She still asks that Joff leave her alone and doesn’t move, at which point he orders Sandor to get her out of bed.

3. “‘Here, girl.’ Sandor Clegane knelt before her, between her and Joffrey. With a delicacy surprising in such a big man, he dabbed at the blood welling from her broken lip.” Sansa VI, AGOT

Not only is he being gentle with her here, he also just prevented her from committing a murder/suicide.

4. “‘True knights,’ he mocked. ‘And I’m no lord, no more than I’m a knight. Do I need to beat that into you?’ Clegane reeled and almost fell. ‘Gods,’ he swore, ‘too much wine. Do you like wine, little bird? True wine? A flagon of sour red, dark as blood, all a man needs. Or a woman.’ He laughed, shook his head. ‘Drunk as a dog, damn me. You come now. Back to your cage, little bird. I’ll take you there. Keep you safe for the king.’ The Hound gave her a push, oddly gentle, and followed her down the steps. By the time they reached the bottom, he had lapsed into a brooding silence, as if he had forgotten she was there.” Sansa II, ACOK

The serpentine encounter is the perfect example of the walking, talking dichotomy that is Sandor Clegane. “Iron fingers” catch her wrist and prevent her from falling down the steps and he makes a joke about how she’s trying to kill them both (something to consider for the future, Sandor: you’re the one lurching out of hidden doorways in the middle of the night, so maybe that’s part of the problem). She says he’s hurting her but he doesn’t let go of her wrist. Then he makes some inappropriate comments about her body and asks her to sing him a song about knights and fair maidens (because he’s a closet sappy romantic like that) because she likes knights. She says she likes true knights and then we come in at the quote. So we go from scary drunk who’s holding her wrist too tight and coming on to her sexually (the only time he ever does) to immediately realizing he’s way out of line, going back to gentle touches and promises to keep her safe. He also lies to protect her from Boros Blount on the very next page. I think it’s fairly safe to say his brooding is primarily about two things: kicking himself over how he just acted, and the “keep you safe for the king” part (he knows Joff well enough to realize that the king is the biggest threat to her safety). In a Daenerys ACOK chapter, she says of Jorah, “Sometimes he thinks of me as a child he must protect, and sometimes as a woman he would like to bed….” I reread that chapter the other day and couldn’t help but think of SanSan and this scene in particular.

5. “The Hound pulled her to her feet, not ungently.” Sansa III, ACOK

This is at the beginning of the scene where she’s beaten and stripped by Boros Blount. While he’s gentle with her in that moment and does tell Joffrey to stop later, his inaction on this occasion is the biggest regret of his life and he cries about it on his “deathbed.”

6. “A stab went through her, so sharp that Sansa sobbed and clutched at her belly. She might have fallen, but a shadow moved suddenly, and strong fingers grabbed her arm and steadied her.” Sansa IV, ACOK

Okay, so I’m kind of convinced that Sandor spends all of his free time stalking her (because he doesn’t know how to handle the fact that he has positive feelings for another human being?). He’s always lurking in shadows, only to pop out to save her from falling. How often does he hide in the shadows near her that we just never see?

7. “She made herself look at that face now, really look. It was only courteous, and a lady must never forget her courtesies. The scars were not the worst part, nor even the way his mouth twitches. It’s his eyes. She had never seen eyes so full of anger. ‘I… I should have come to you after,’ she said haltingly. ‘To thank you, for… for saving me… you were so brave.’” Sansa IV, ACOK

Ugh, I just have so many feels about this interaction. Between these two quotes, Sandor bb gets sad because she’s scared of him and “still can’t bear to look,” so he lashes out. “He is a dog, just as he says. A half-wild, mean-tempered dog that bites any hand that tries to pet him, and yet will savage any man who tries to hurt his master.” Yes, because he is an ABUSED dog and no one has every tried to pet him before so he’s getting very confused. I’m getting side-tracked by the feels so I’ll stop myself here.

8. “Of late Ser Osmund had taken Sandor Clegane’s place by Joffrey’s side, and Sansa had heard the women at the washing well saying that he was as strong as the Hound, only younger and faster. If that was so, she wondered why she had never once heard of these Kettleblacks before Ser Osmund was named to the Kingsguard.” Sansa VI, ACOK

I considered also including this under the Kettleblacks, but decided against it because she’s not the one saying they’re strong. Her attitude here feels similar to her attitude during the first unkiss mention (“these other girls/women are so silly—I have the Hound and what they have is inferior”).

9. “He yanked her closer, and for a moment she thought he meant to kiss her. He was too strong to fight. She closed her eyes, wanting it to be over, but nothing happened.” Sansa VII, ACOK

This one typically gets left out because it doesn’t exactly portray him in a positive light, but I’m trying to include everything, good and bad. I have some thoughts on this re: the unkiss, but this isn’t the place for that. Short version: it would have been very easy for GRRM to write something like “she wished he wouldn’t,” but instead he wrote “wanting it to be over.” I’m not saying she wanted him to kiss her in that moment, but she didn’t not want him to kiss her either (or it could be a “just get it over with” scenario).

Tyrion

1. “Sansa watched him walk off, his body swaying heavily from side to side, like something from a grotesquerie. He speaks more gently than Joffrey, she thought, but the queen spoke to me gently too. He’s still a Lannister, her brother and Joff’s uncle, and no friend. Once she had loved Prince Joffrey with all her heart, and admired and trusted his mother, the queen. They had repaid that love and trust with her father’s head. Sansa would never make that mistake again.” Sansa I, ACOK

“More gently than Joffrey” is a pretty low bar. Overall, not a very glowing review of Tyrion: he’s not a monster, but he’s grotesque, can’t be trusted, and could turn into a monster later.

Osmund Kettleblack

1. “Sansa tried to run, but Cersei’s handmaiden caught her before she’d gone a yard. Ser Meryn Trant gave her a look that made her cringe, but Kettleblack touched her almost gently and said, “Do as you’re told, sweetling, it won’t be so bad. Wolves are supposed to be brave, aren’t they?” Sansa III, ASOS

If you didn’t have déjà vu while reading this, something is wrong because this is almost EXACTLY the same as a Sandor moment included on this list. (“‘Do as you’re bid, child,’ Clegane said. ‘Dress.’ He pushed her toward her wardrobe, almost gently.”) HOWEVER, I don’t think Sandor would have been so chill in this particular situation. This is as she’s being dragged off to marry Tyrion and seeing as finding out Sansa had married Tyrion made Sandor suicidal, well, that’s a thought for another day. Between this and Sandor #8, I feel like there’s potential for a SanSan meta solely comparing Sandor and the Kettleblacks. (Someone else please write that—I’m only even doing this because I have mild writer’s block on a fic and needed a break.)

Ser Dontos

1. “‘Not far.’ Ser Dontos took her hand in his own and rubbed it gently. “Your friend is near, waiting for you.’” Sansa V, ASOS

This is while she and Dontos are escaping after Joffrey’s murder. It’s mentioned that they take the serpentine steps at one point. See Sandor #4 for another important interaction there.

Petyr Baelish

1. “He saved Alayne, his daughter, a voice within her whispered. But she was Sansa too… and sometimes it seemed to her that the Lord Protector was two people as well. He was Petyr, her protector, warm and funny and gentle… but he was also Littlefinger, the lord she’d known at King’s Landing, smiling slyly and stroking his beard as he whispered in Queen Cersei’s ear. And Littlefinger was no friend of hers. When Joff had her beaten, the Imp defended her, not Littlefinger. When the mob sought to rape her, the Hound carried her to safety, not Littlefinger. When the Lannisters we’d her to Tyrion against her will, Ser Garlan the Gallant gave her comfort, not Littlefinger. Littlefinger never lifted so much as his little finger for her.” Sansa I, AFFC

Wow, so there’s a lot to unpack here but most of it isn’t relevant to this post. However, this is one of the many times she compares Sandor favorably to other men.

2. “‘Forgive her, my lords,’ Petyr Baelish said softly. ‘She still has nightmares of that day. Small wonder if she cannot bear to speak of it.’ He came up behind her and put his hands gently on her shoulders. ‘I know how hard this is for you, Alayne, but our friends must hear the truth.’ Her throat felt so dry and tight it almost hurt to speak.” Sansa I, AFFC

I see two SanSan parallels in this brief passage. Putting his hands on her shoulders from behind reminds me of her first interaction with Sandor and her throat hasn’t been “dry and tight” since the Blackwater. All of the language in the Blackwater scene is highly sexual, but here, those are the only words that stand out and I only noticed them because they’ve been used before.

Lothor Brune

1. “Sober, he was a quiet man, but a strong one. And Petyr says he’s loyal.” Alayne II, AFFC

The only thing I’ll say about Lothor is that Sansa also compares him to Sandor/he triggers memories about Sandor (ex: the incident with Marillion where she thinks it might be the Hound saving her for a moment before she realizes that’s impossible).

Here’s a chart for the visual learners

Conclusion: Sandor is the only man worthy of Sansa, as per her father’s parameters

While, just like Sansa, “I knew the Hound would win,” I didn’t expect the results to be this conclusive. He hits all three points while no one else scores above a two. SANDOR BB IS THE ONLY ONE WHO MEETS MORE THAN ONE CRITERIA. SHE NEVER DESCRIBES ANOTHER MAN AS BRAVE. NOT ONCE. ONLY HIM. She talks about brave men in general, but he is the only specific man she ever calls brave.* And it’s not internal monologue like all of the other instances I’ve outlined—she’s saying it aloud, thanking him to his face. And it’s also worth noting that several of the occasions she describes another man as gentle or strong are callbacks to interactions with Sandor. Knowing GRRM, there’s no way that’s an accident. So SanSan is endgame or GRRM is the world’s biggest troll. Either way, my heart hurts.

*While bravery only shows up once in this analysis, Sansa does frequently describe women (herself included) as being brave and also reminds herself to be brave a lot (that whole weird thing where GRRM writes female characters like actual people instead of accessories to the men in their lives).

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dj-richie-roux · 6 years ago

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Talking The Talk - Chapter 1

DEEP BREATH..... Here goes ~

I’d like to start this series of blogs with a focus on my most recent in depth discussion & a bit of background info.. Makes sense i guess to start there & work backwards slowly & surely through what i’m throwing out into cyberspace... Fasten your seatbelts readers... The rollercoaster ride starts here ---------> PUNISHMENT IN SENIOR/HIGH SCHOOLS.

Earlier this past week i had the pleasure of visiting my daughters school to discuss her progress & the targets set for her to achieve the best results she can achieve from her High School journey.

After a good hour of positive chat with teachers & the head master i sat to speak with her science teacher... All very positive & pleasing... By some quirk of fate the subject of punishment (Detention/Isolation) came to the fore due to an indirect incident. The teacher was rightly disturbed by something my daughter had mentioned.. I had to jump in & offer a calm vibe and an alternative view as i honestly felt punishment wasn’t the right way to put this ongoing series of incidents right.

I won’t go into the whole discussion but i will say i shocked the teacher by speaking up and stating i didn’t approve of the punishments available... & felt this could be fixed by calm face to face talking with the naughty boys and an assertive chat with them, letting them know the consequences of their immature actions wasn’t acceptable and had caused distress over a period of time... I’m not quite sure he agreed with me.. I feel i know why but i’ll keep that to myself.

WHY you may ask do i disprove of said punishment???? WELL once upon a time many moons ago i too experienced 5 years of life in Senior School in Middlesbrough in the North East of England... The first 2 years were problem free & enjoyable.. Then i guess as hormones kicked in & an air of competitiveness took hold, BIG PROBLEMS started... I honestly can’t remember how many times i got detentions & spent hours and hours sat outside the Head Masters office doing school work set by my subject teachers ( i basically had a season ticket outside his office) & i hated it, missed my mates & missed being able to attend lessons and Physical stuff i loved... Cross country running, football, swimming rugby and so many other activities were out of bounds for me cos the BASTARD H/M thought it was clever & a punishment i’d learn from by taking my passions away from me... IT DIDN’T WORK it made me resentful & turned me into what mi mam used to call me “A LITTLE TWAT” when at school - Nearly every day i got told i’d amount to nothing.. i’d fail all exams & most likely end up in Durham Prison... THE H/M & Teachers WERE WRONG SO SO WRONG... Yes i was a wrong un but i proved them wrong time & time again... Richie was one smart kid they just couldn’t CONTROL & the more they pushed my buttons the more destructive i became.. I got kicked out of school loads of times for a week, two weeks with a load of work to do at home... IT DIDN’T WORK.

Outside school i was good as gold most of the time.. Loved getting out on my bike exploring, delivering the teesside times on a thursday after school for pocket money.. Loved playing football and going over to Hartlepool to watch football & round to Ayresome Park to watch Middlesbrough FC & the reserve team on a tuesday night... Going to away games odd weekends with school mates to watch Boro was always an adventure....I was a happy go lucky free spirit and nowt like i was at school.

Anyway i’ll get to my point... I feel the above punishments DO NOT WORK... Not just cos of my story.. I wasn’t the only walking talking nightmare in my senior school... THERE WERE MANY but i think i was one the worst (I’m NOT proud of this) BUT i am proud of myself for not buckling to the control they tried to assert to break me and refused to absorb the bullshit they tried to force into my mind.

THERE WAS & IS A BETTER WAY and had they been fair and on the level with me in a calm way i’d have been a model pupil just like my daughter has been from starting her journey.... FOOD FOR THOUGHT >>> She’s good as gold both sides of the school gates & there’s many reasons why that's the case... I’ll let YOU the reader decide why that might be.... You may agree with everything i’ve typed you may not... Its cool, its your choice.. I just wanted to get this blog series off the ground and offload the 1st chapter into cyberspace.

I know many remember severe punishments in School.. Getting whacked with a bamboo cane.. Leather strap or Plimsole... I got whacked a few times on my hands with that leather strap BUT the day the H/M wanted to whack me with the bamboo cane on my backside was a mistake... Mi mam warned him and delivered one of her eye to eye killer stares.. That was enough to change his mind.. Incase you’re thinking this fella typing needed a father figure in his life.. I’ve had one all my life, a brilliant dad who worked his socks off for his family.. Loved us all & although we had some struggles at times our family bond was & still is tight and strong.

DOES PUNISHMENT WORK IN SCHOOLS??? YOU DECIDE???

#blog #blog post #real talk #straight talk

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frozenfallenuniverse · 7 years ago

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A Covering Smile

Sometimes it was nice to go on a quiet walk early in the morning.

“Miss.” No big hordes of people to deal with, hardly anyone was awake.

“Miss!” Just herself, the morning air and a bit of exercise.

“Miss, you have to get down from there! It's dangerous!” Seems she wasn’t alone. She looked down from the blue stone roof she was happily walking on to see a boros legionnaire. You could easily tell from their white armor with red accents and the stick that just so happened to be stuck far up his…

“Ah, I’m fine up here! I got cat-like reflexes!” She held her hands up like the paws of a cat and did her best impression of one.The sound of a roof tile cracking under her weight was a bit louder than it.

“Miss, that’s all well and good but you should come down!” She pouted and slowly unwrapped the massive weapon that she was carrying on her back. The guard’s eyes went wide and slowly… no, they rushed back as Samger pulled out her battleaxe, jumped off the building and had it land, blade first, two feet in front of where that guard, who was currently not in the best mental or pants situation, was standing. Although she jumped down about four stories of building, her pale skin seemed more alive than before and the axe hummed as though it was an izzet boiler about to burst.

“I came down! Now you can’t say I didn’t follow your orders!” She kicked the head out of the ground and it spun up, fixing itself to its previous position as though her spine was a magnet.

“I’m gonna go now! Bye bye, Mr. boros man!” And with that she strolled away from the guard, who was still flabbergasted by the situation that just happened in front of him, and made her way to her favorite store on oak street. The smell of bittersweet coffee beans slowly filled her nostrils as she approached.

Even though it was morning, Bica’s store still had a decent amount of patrons. Some normal for the plane and other, more feathery ones, clearly walkers from another plane. Compared to the rest of them, the auburn haired energetic tomboy, who almost broke the doorframe with the head of her axe, was more on the normal side. Mostly. She sat down, beside an empty stool and tired looking merchant who seemed to think coffee was a form of alcohol. Her smile almost blinded him as she was bouncing from her stool. Bica quickly came with a menu and she ordered within moments.

“One coffee! Black!” Her eyes squinted as though she was a private detective about to solve a case.

“Right away! Should I bring sugar like normal?” The satyr responded in turn. Samger’s face grew hot and she pulled up her shirt to cover her mouth as she nodded profusely. A few minutes passed as she waited. Some people left, others entered. Some groups spoke as though they were the only people here and others kept to themselves, skimming the closest thing that could be called a newspaper in the world of guilds. Finally, her beverage arrived.

She boldly took a sip… only to sputter it out like she just drank whatever passes as water in the undercity. Were it not for her tentative sip before, the tea cup would be overflowing as she put in around a palm’s worth of sugar cubes.

Her restful break of drinking something, that could hardly be classified as coffee at this point, ended after around fifteen long minutes. She reached around for her small coin purse, which had a design similar to a small cartoonist’s rendition of a badger, pulled out a few small zinos and made her way back to her home, skipping while whistling a tune. Each passerby gave her a smile which became dwarfed by the one on her face. Within her mind, there were a multitude of reasons to be happy. For one, Meiyo was returning from a work trip, that lasted two days, which meant she was going to have some awesome food today! For two, Meiyo said they’d bathe Dodger today! That was normally one of her jobs and as much as she loved her baby, bathing him was a different story… It wasn’t long before she was finally at the thick mahogany door that was the entry to her home. She had planned the most secretive of entries and the calmest of entries.

“MEIYO, I MISSED YOU, I’M HOME!” The door slammed open and almost made a dent in the wall, which had to be replaced with stone recently for obvious reasons. She threw caution to the wind and ran about as quick as it as well to find Meiyo resting on the couch with a towel wrapped Dodger in their lap.

“I was able to tell the moment you said M. How was Bica’s?” They slowly unwrapped Dodger as they spoke. The badger took the opportunity to shake water all over his owners, jump down and plod around the living room.

“How did you know I was at Bica’s?” She gasped. “Are you stalking me?!”

“No, it's usually where you are at this time of day. I believe you said ‘She’s so cute that I could drink the most bitter drink known to man to see her’”

“I stand by that!”

“Did you get into trouble?” Meiyo’s unflinching mask continued to stare at their housemate. The badger slowly returned to the couch and required Meiyo’s assistance to actually get atop the couch.

“I have never gotten in trouble in my life, Meiyo, and that is a fact!”

“I made a list.”

“YOU MADE A LIST??? I DON’T NEED TO HEAR THIS.”

“Dodger, make sure she doesn’t leave.” Dodger hopped down from his nest, making a chattering noise that sounded disappointed.

“What makes you think that my- OH MY GOD MEIYO LOOK AT HIM!!!” A squeal that could shatter glass came from her mouth as she looked down at the, now sleeping, badger that lied down on her feet.

“Anyway, the list. Let’s see: you attempted to hug a gorgon, you said you could beat Borborygmos in an arm wrestling match, you attempted to kill several boros guildmages.”

“In my defense…”

“In your defense?...”

“I was expecting you to say something.” A sense of disdain could be felt in the air between Samger and Meiyo.

“You attempted to adopt a fairy, angel and elf planeswalkers. You, ahem, ‘punched a dude so hard he exploded’ in front of a cleric and you didn’t get me a coffee.”

“That last one isn’t a crime!”

“Yes, but you went to Bica’s without me. You could have at least gotten me one of her muffins or scones.” Samger pouted as Meiyo finished their long list and finally picked up Dodger, carrying him like you would a baby.

“Next time, I go I will! So, what do you want to do?” Her smile returned as she sat next to the shapeshifted and began to play with Dodger’s feet.

“Reading, dinner and rest.”

“What do you want me to read?”

“Something interesting and new. I got a new book from my trip. Let’s try that.” She profusely nodded in response, pulled out the tome they were speaking about and spent the rest of the day hanging out with her best friend.

Those words still haunted her sleep. ‘It’ll be fine, honey. Nothing will go wrong. I promise.’ Those words came from a demon’s smile. It still stings years later. An adrenaline rushed that burned. The tears that came evaporated and made it sting more. The worst part was the smiling only stopped when she disappeared. Meiyo was there, concerned and carrying her to their home. Warm. Safe. She couldn’t sleep.

The creaking of a door filled the moonlit coated room that belonged to her shapeshifter friend. They were lying face down on their bed, their fox mask on a night stand.

“Meiyo? Are you awake?” Her normally happy voice was somber and nearly silent. Their groaning was the first response as their hand grabbed the mask and placed it on the back of their head.

“Nightmares again?” She made an agreeing noise and walked to the edge of the bed.

“Can I sleep with you tonight?” Their answer was a hand waving her to the bed. She snuggled in, Meiyo placed their mask back on the nightstand and she was able to get a decent amount of sleep tonight.

It had been two days since she didn’t have nightmares while sleeping.

#samger #meiyo #bica #fanwalker #mtg #my writing #drabbles #they cute

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kaylmurray · 7 years ago

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BELOW IS A TRANSLATION OF AN INTERVIEW I CARRIED OUT IN SPANISH WITH http://madridistareal.com

THE ORIGINAL VERSION OF THE INTERVIEW IS THE POST PREVIOUS TO THIS ONE.

Tell us a little about your new adventure in Miami.

I came to Miami from Spain to work for beINSPORTSUSA 5 years ago. I came to take on a new challenge and to helpwith the growth of LaLiga in the USA. The channel also has the rights to Serie A, Ligue 1 and many other sports.

Madridismo remembers you as one of the well-known faces from the international version of Real Madrid TV. How do you remember this time?

It was one of the best experiences of my life, I lived there for 6 years. Everything changed for me, not only in my professional life, but on a personal level too.

With Real Madrid, I travelled to many places around the world and I experienced some very special things.

My first season was the “Juntos Podemos” ** and my last season was the final season of Mourinho.

I missed the tenth, eleventh and twelfth Champions League wins but I was there for three Liga title wins, a Copa del Rey, Cristiano’s arrival, the return of Florentino Perez and the final year of Beckham, Roberto Carlos and Ronaldo. It wasn’t such a bad era.

**Juntos Podemos “Together We Can’ was basically a promotional campaign from the local media the club and the fans to urge everyone to unite in the final stages of the season to garner the belief that Real Madrid could beat Barcelona (and Sevilla) to the league title. Real Madrid won the title on the final day of the season. Real Madrid finished level on points with Barcelona but had a better head to head record (2-0 at Bernabeu and 3-3 at Camp Nou).

How does a girl from Middlesbrough end up at the Santiago Bernabeu?

I started my career on Boro TV, the official club channel of my hometown team, Middlesbrough.

After that I studied journalism and during my studies, I saw a casting for the international version of RMTV, which back then was a new project. I screen-tested but I didn’t get the job. A year later, another position became available and this time, I did get it!

Were you already a Madrid fan before you worked at RMTV or did you become a Madrid fan during your time in Madrid?

Before working at RMTV, I wasn’t really a Madrid fan but I remember reading the press when Beckham was going to leave Manchester United and back then, no one was sure whether he’d go to Madrid or Barcelona, and I remember thinking, ‘It has to be Madrid,’ and I don’t know why I thought that.

At that time, I had no idea that one day I would be working at RMTV. But it was impossible not to fall in love with the team after a season like that of 06/07.

What was it like for you as a club insider to experience those team triumphs?

Incredible and unforgettable! I have wonderful memories. Memories like running onto the pitch in Pamplona to interview the players after winning Liga number 31, with security guards chasing me! Celebrating in the mixed zone with the players while they sprayed champagne all the journalists with champagne. I returned to Madrid that night (on a bus) with my friends from “Cinco Estrellas” (one of the well-known Madrid fan clubs).

The journeys back on the team plane after a victory were always a lot of fun too. The memories of the parties with my colleagues in Madrid and Valencia after winning a league or a Copa will also live with me forever.

During the 7 seasons you spent with RMTV, you shared some special times with players an coaches from the first team. Do you have any interesting anecdotes you can tell us?

Many! There were times when some of the Spanish players had to speak in English for promotional campaigns or video messages. It was always fun to teach them to speak English. On the away trips, the players were always telling jokes between themselves and my colleagues at RMTV. I even remember Cristiano putting on the Manchester accent, which made me laugh!

The worst memories were in my first few months in Valdebebas (Real Madrid’s training ground), where Cassano would try and strike the football at me. Back then I didn’t know a lot of Spanish and I didn’t know how to ask him to stop doing it! But guess what? He missed me everytime!

Who is the player or manager you had the best professional/working relationship with?

I’m clear on this one - Ruud Van Nistelrooy. We arrived at the club in the same season, he spoke English and he always had time (he was very kind) for the international version and for our families and friends.

Once Mourinho came in, the Spanish press were at first very belligerent. What do you think this animosity was down to in the pressrooms?

Perhaps it’s because his style as a manager was very different and they weren’t used to a manager like him, especially because the access to the players had been very easy before his arrival. I had never seen journalists with such free access to the players like I had in Spain. But Mou’s mentality to convert the training ground into a “bunker” didn’t go down well.

I know that Mourinho’s era didn’t end well and that there are many people who speak negatively of it, but it’s also worth remembering that he also changed a lot of important things, like the mentality of the team to believe that they were capable of competing with Pep’s Barcelona and he also brought an end to the curse of the Last 16 in the Champions League. *

* For six straight seasons, Madrid did not get past the Last 16 of the tournament.

What’s your opinion of Mourinho of a manager? What was it like to work with him? And with Cristiano Ronaldo?

At first, it was very easy to work with Mourinho, he was very kind with everyone working in and around the club, including those of us from the official channel. In his last season, it was a little different, due to the atmosphere surrounding the club.

I only have good memories of Cristiano. Never in my life had I seen so many people demanding the attention of one single person. But despite this, he was always very kind to us, speaking in English and even on the days when he didn’t have time to speak with us in the mixed zone, he would always say: “I’m sorry! Not today but for sure we can do it next week!”

You presented the Ballon D’Or twice. Was that a lot of pressure?

A lot of pressure, but a huge honour too, one of the biggest honours of my professional life. However, it’s better for Cristiano that I’m not the one presenting the Ballon D’Or because on the two occasions that I did, Messi won! In my defense, I will say that I was the presenter on the ‘Green Carpet’ for the FIFA THE BEST awards last year and Cristiano won, so I’m not the jinx anymore!

I was asked before the second-leg semi about Bayern as a rival.

It won’t be easy, but the Champions League for Madrid is like spinach to Popeye….it makes them stronger!

Do you think Madrid have the chance to win their third consecutive Champions League this season? What percentage? Knock yourself out!

Of course I think there’s a chance but I don’t want to tempt fate. I’ve seen so many strange and unexpected things this season that you never know. Anything can happen!

Recently, Real Madrid have started to find their stride. There are players like Marco Asensio, Lucas Vazquez and Mateo Kovacic, who began as fringe players/subs and are now taking important steps forward in recent months. What quality would you highlight for each one of them?

I’m a big fan of the three…and who said that Real Madrid did not have a Plan B?!

MARCO - A golden left-foot

His confidence is not for nothing. It’s because he knows better than anyone else just what he is capable of.

LUCAS - Very, very dependable.

The fact that he asked to take the penalty in the shootout in the second final against Atleti and also that he was the first to take it - and scored, tells you everything.

MATEO - His through-balls. For me, he’s very underrated.

Has the fact that you’re a female sports journalist specializing in football presented any kind of handicap for you. Throughout your career, have you had to prove yourself more than a male in your profession might have to?

Sometimes, but a lot less these days. Spain gave me more opportunities as a female in football than my own country did. I am eternally grateful for that.

Finally! Do you miss living in Madrid?

Very much so! And even more so recently because over here everybody’s obsessed with “Money Heist” (a Spanish show, based in Madrid, on Netflix) and when I see Madrid and hear the accent, it makes me really want to return! I’ve always felt at home in Madrid. I’ve been back a few times in the last few years and I am going to keep on doing so.

Thanks for your time, Kay.

Thank you to all of you.

#RealMadrid KayMurray RMTV RealMadridTV CristianoRonaldo RuudVanNistelrooy LaLiga BeINSPORTS

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maris-solstice · 7 years ago

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Due to @odric-master-swagtician doing this, I’ma do one for my boy.

Stuff under the cut bc it is LONG

Character Name: Maris Solstice (Formerly Marius Celestus) Age: 25-26 ish, I always forget and I’m too lazy to double-check Appearance: As of right now this is the only art I have of him with one arm missing. It’s good tho, so here it is:

Armor colorscheme by @sigardaa

1. What do you know about this character now that s/he doesn’t know?

He’s gonna die on Bant a long time from now and have his soul reincarnated into an angel because why do I do this to myself.

2. What is this character’s greatest flaw?

His pride.

3. What do you know about this character that s/he would never admit?

He’s constantly in some form of pain or emotional distress. He’s admitted it to others when it’s gotten unbearable but for the most part he hides it so others don’t worry about him.

4. What is this character’s greatest asset?

His conviction.

5. If this character could choose a different identity, who would s/he be?

He would be a cathar, but events kind of...ruined that.

6. What music does this character sing to when no one else is around?

I like to imagine he absently hums old Ravnican lullabies.

7. In what or whom does this character have the greatest faith?

The course of justice, and the ideals of right makes might, not might makes right.

8. What is this character’s favorite movie?

Mmmkay so if movies existed he would be all in on the Adventures of Tintin. Mystery, intrigue, globehopping, a young red-haired protagonist with a penchant for investigation, bringing criminals to justice. It’s perfect. That or Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.

9. Does this character have a favorite article of clothing? Favorite shoes?

His favorite article of clothing is his belt. He wears it everywhere. His favorite shoes? I don’t think he really has a favorite so much as ‘only one pair of boots’

10. Does this character have a vice? Name it.

Alcohol. Plain and simple. He’s trying to beat it.

11. Name this character’s favorite person (living or dead.)

His wife, Isolde.

12. What is this character’s secret wish?

To one day quit the guild. He views it as a sacred duty, but he longs for the day he can say he’s done his duty to the fullest extent.

13. What is this character’s proudest achievement?

Getting married.

14. Describe this character’s most embarrassing moment.

When he was a child he caused a massive amount of property damage to a Lyev training ground and was kicked out of the Azorius’ recruitment program due to “use of chaotic magics and a willfulness undesirable in Lyev recruits.”

15. What is this character’s deepest regret?

He knows he likely would have died, but he can’t help but think if he’d been a little faster, he could have pulled his parents from the fire.

16. What is this character’s greatest fear?

Losing his wife and the rest of his found family.

17. Describe this character’s most devastating moment.

When his first love, a cathar named Ilsibeth, was cut down by one of the Flight of Nightmares in front of him while he watched. It was the event that prompted him not to leave Ravnica for several months and sent him into a downward spiral of alcoholism and throwing himself into his work.

18. What is this character’s greatest achievement?

Getting married.

19. What is this character’s greatest hope?

That one day his life will calm the fuck down and he can just live with Isolde and be happy.

20. Does this character have an obsession? Name it.

Not really, anymore. He’s recovered well from his depressive period.

21. What is this character’s greatest disappointment?

When he was a kid he thought Agrus Kos was still alive. That was a rough day.

22. What is this character’s worst nightmare?

Losing his found family. He has no family left besides them and he’s lost so much in his life.

23. Whom does this character most wish to please? Why?

His wife. Partly out of a fear of losing her, but mostly because he thinks she deserves to be happy and he loves her.

24. Describe this character’s mother.

Aris Celestus was an Izzet inventor who was a part of the Warmind Initiative. She’s where Maris got his smile and his hair, and his Red. Her attitude toward him was one of vocal support and affection for her son, and she was a bright and happy person, a good influence for him when he was really young.

25. Describe this character’s father.

Martold Celestus was more of a stoic, quiet type, and he gave Maris a strong respect for the law and the process of justice, as well as his White. He was a constant strong presence for Maris, who looked up to him and wanted to be just like him one day, prompting his path to join the Boros.

26. If s/he had to choose, with whom would this character prefer to live?

His mother. It would come down to a simple question of “Who would let me have a little more freedom” because he loved them both very very much.

27. Where does this character fall in birth order? What effect does this have?

He’s an only child. This made him a lot more independent but also gave him a lot of reliance on his friends.

28. Describe this character’s siblings or other close relatives.

He has an aunt who works for the Izzet. He thinks she blames him for the death of her sister, and hasn’t talked to her in years.

29. Describe this character’s bedroom. Include three cherished items.

Well he’s got a pretty big bed, some bedside tables and dressers, probably armor everywhere. A graduation certificate from Horizon, a portrait of his parents, and a portrait of Isolde are the most important things he has in that room.

30. What is this character’s birth date? How does this character manifest traits of his/her astrological sign?

Well uh, hell if I know. I know he was born in the late summer-early fall on Ravnica, but idk how that works

31. If this character had to live in seclusion for six months, what items would s/he bring?

His sword, for defense, a few basic survival supplies like a canteen, a small hatchet, a bedroll. Wouldn’t need a tinderbox or anything because pyromancy.

32. Why is this character angry?

Like, in general, or right now?

33. What calms this character?

A feeling of safety, and knowing his loved ones are safe.

34. Describe a recurring dream or nightmare this character might have.

He’s running, and running, and a building is on fire, but no matter how fast he runs, it’s not getting closer, and now the tears are streaming from his eyes as the smoke gets to him, and he collapses on the ground, choking and crying, and in the windows of the building his parents, Isolde, Ilsibeth, Ivaria, Alek, his mentor Pachymeres, his Wojeks, all stare at him in disappointment as the building collapses in flames.

35. List the choices (not circumstances) that led this character to his/her current predicament.

His choice to fight, his choice to join the Boros, his choice to follow his oath of service, not necessarily in that order.

36. List the circumstances over which this character has no control.

What happens to his family when he’s not around.

37. What wakes this character in the middle of the night?

He’s often woken up in fear, terrified to open his eyes and be alone.

38. How would a stranger describe this character?

He’s a happy man with sad eyes.

39. What does this character resolve to do differently every morning?

Not much, to be honest. He’s a creature of habit.

40. Who depends on this character? Why?

I would imagine Isolde does to an extent, as well as the other Wojeks like Petra, Nora, Zia, Belthor, etc, but I don’t want to speak for other people’s characters.

41. If this character knew s/he had exactly one month to live, what would s/he do?

Take his wife wherever she wanted to go and spend the whole month with her.

42. How would a dear friend or relative describe this character?

He’s a conflicted man with a lot of internal struggles and pain, but he’s a good man and he’d do anything for the people he loves.

43. What is this character’s most noticeable physical attribute?

His sideburns, or his scar, or his auburn hair.

44. What is this character hiding from him/herself?

His own fear.

45. Write one additional thing about your character.

He’s still a werecat. Because I think it’s fucking hilarious.

Gonna tag @foxcoloredcat, @wojekrookie, @pope509 @hazoretspartyfavors and @bobstropajo bc of character mentions.

#fanwalker #Maris

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hellomissmabel · 7 years ago

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The worst in us - part 1

MASTERLIST

Pairing: Bucky x reader, Steve x reader

Warnings: friends-with-benefits relationship, allusions to a quickie.

Word count: 2.965

Summary: Y/N is a young woman that grew up in a world of richness and extravaganza of the Hamptons, until a family scandal forces her to leave her home behind. She now rents a little studio in Brooklyn with her roommate and co-worker, Wanda. Y/N works at Stark Hospital as a gynaecologist and is romantically involved with a trauma surgeon. Everything seems to be going well until a ghost from the past shows up unannounced, putting Y/N’s resolve to the test and asking her how truly good her intentions for leaving really were.

A/N: Inspired by the word “Onsra” (Boro) - that heart-wrenching feeling you get when you realise a love won’t last. Written for @howlingbarnes AND IT’S HER BIRTHDAY SO GO WISH HER A HAPPY BIRTHDAY

The commute to the hospital took longer than you had anticipated so inevitably, you to show up late for you shift. Not that you had anything special scheduled today, just a couple consultations and check-ups, leaving some room for you to catch lunch with your friends and colleagues. You hadn’t really been feeling yourself as of late and you desperately needed to recharge your batteries with some social contact.

You’re poking absentmindedly at your chicken salad, only listening half to the story Sam’s telling Wanda while trying to pay some kind of attention to the conversation Clint’s trying to hold with you. Occasionally you hum as a response or give a half-hearted nod, but when the table eventually falls silent, you know your cover’s blown.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?,” Wanda inquires softly, her brows knitted together in one big question mark.

“Nah,” you breathe out slowly, dropping your knife and fork next to your bowl. “I don’t wanna bother you with my problems.”

“Y/N,” Sam kindly places his hand on yours, “That’s what friends are for. To listen to each other’s crap. And you’ve already listened plenty, so what’s up?”

Sam is a male nurse who worked excruciating hours trying to provide a living for himself and his little brother and sister. Sitting next to Sam is Pietro, a physical therapist in charge of getting people back up on their feet and helping with their recovery. Pietro is loved by many and hated by many more, especially since he has a tendency of hooking up with co-workers. He’s also the brother of your roommate, Wanda, who’s one of the receptionists and contributed to you landing your job in the first place. Lastly, sitting next to Wanda is Clint, the only optometrist currently employed at the hospital and always terribly busy. It’s a small miracle he made it to your lunch date at all.

You laugh a little and shrug. “You know, that trauma surgeon I’ve been telling you about?” They all nod simultaneously, remembering you’ve mentioned him a couple times before. “Well, we’ve kinda been having this friends-with-benefits thing going on.”

Wanda gasps loudly, whispering a ‘no way’ as she locks eyes with an equally astonished Clint. “For how long?”

“It started the night we had that fundraiser,” you speak up in a soft tone, looking at your baffled friends. “We were both a little tipsy and ended up in a hotel room. The next morning was awful and awkward and we both promised each other it would never happen again. We didn’t want it to interfere with our professional relationship so we just forgot about it.”

“I sense there’s a ‘but’ coming…,” Sam says in a hushed voice, chuckling lowly.

“But…,” you click your tongue in amusement before coughing dryly, colour rising to your cheeks, “One day my car wouldn’t start so he offered me a ride and…”

“You ended up riding him instead,” Sam interjects playfully, poking your side before bursting into a fit of joyous laughter.

Wanda slaps his arm, squinting her eyes at him and speaking in a chastising tone. “Sam! Don’t say that! She isn’t finished yet!”

“It’s okay, Wanda,” you smile sincerely at her. “So yeah… Because we didn’t want this to get any more complicated than it already was, he proposed we’d become friends with benefits instead of just spontaneously bumping uglies whenever we run into each other. This way, we could keep a low profile, you know?”

Sam smirks knowingly yet Wanda’s concern only grows. “So what happened? Did he break things off? Or did you break things off?”

“Two night ago, he invited me over at his place in Brooklyn for drinks. We had a couple glasses of wine followed by a hot and heavy make-out session on his kitchen table. You can guess the rest… He’s really good at aftercare and the pillow talk is always so sweet. But I usually leave after we’ve come down from our highs…”

“He asked you to stay the night, didn’t he?,” Clint states immediately, recognising the signs, having experienced the same thing with his girlfriend, Laura.

“Yeah… and because I didn’t know what this would mean for us and how it would affect our work… I bolted. He texted me all day yesterday.” You look down at your phone and flip it in your hands, feeling a bit disappointed. “Haven’t received a single text from him today, though.”

“Sounds like he got the message,” Sam comments with a shrug.

“Just not the message I was trying to send…,” you say, biting your lower lip in a flood of guilt.

How could you be so rude to such a nice guy? It’s not that you don’t fancy Steve, my God, he’s made of 200% boyfriend material! But is it possible for a steady relationship to grow from something that was never meant to be anything more than just sex?

“Hey, Y/N, it’s okay. We’re all grown-ups and that includes your hot-shot surgeon, too,” Sam winks at you. “If you didn’t wanna sleep at his place, that’s alright. But you should probably talk to him anyway.”

You give him a brief nod. “Yeah, you’re right. I think I’m gonna do that.”

Your pager suddenly beeps and you read the message. Throwing your things back into your bag and passing your untouched chicken salad to Wanda, you mumble a goodbye to your friends, offering a quick explanation. “I gotta go. Emergency C-section. Pepper Pots.”

They all cheer a ‘you go girl’ at you and you feel an instant boost of self-confidence that carries on through the entire delivery. During your regular check-ups with Pepper, you’ve grown from acquaintances to mutuals. Yet Pepper is married to Tony Stark, the owner of the hospital, so there’s a lot of pressure on you. But you are determined to bring a healthy baby into this world safe and sound and make his or her parents happy and proud.

The C-section, although impromptu, goes very well and Pepper and Tony welcome their baby girl. Afterwards, you gladly receive many congratulations from your colleagues, heading straight to the lockers so you can change out of your bloody scrubs. You are sending a quick text to Wanda, asking her if she could cook you dinner as well since you are thoroughly exhausted, whilst opening the door to the locker room. As if fate itself has taken a personal interest in your love life, there is doctor Steven Grant Rogers standing right in front of you in nothing but his white Calvin Klein underwear.

“Holy crap!,” you exclaim in embarrassment, covering up your eyes and turning around to face the door.

You can hear him laugh heartily behind you. “Oh Y/N, it’s not like you haven’t seen it all before.”

“Steve!,” you squeal even louder. “Just put some clothes on, please!”

The rustling of fabric and a little laugh announce that he’s somewhat decent again, clad in dark blue jeans and a plain white shirt. Not to mention his go-to black leather jacket. When he says it’s all good and you can turn around again, you do so slowly and carefully. Of course you’re instantly met with a huge, lopsided grin and a knowing look in his eyes. For a second you believe he might come over to you, wrap his arm around your waste and lock your lips in a passionate kiss. But instead he stuffs his hands in his pockets and leans against his locker, which is conveniently the one right across from yours.

You groan inwardly as you open the lock and look inside your locker, taking out your clothes and motioning for him to turn around as you change, too. Another loud chuckle accompanied by a shake of his head and you’re swiftly shedding yourself from your scrubs and into a light grey, casual dress.

“You know, Y/N… you’re just the person I wanted to talk to.” He tries to sound casual but his voice has taken a lower pitch, nervousness shining through.

“Steve,” you sigh as you close your locker and he turns around to face you, placing his hands on your hips and bringing your chest to his. “I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have left so abruptly.”

“I’m sorry, too, Y/N. I shouldn’t have brought it up in the first place.” His thumb circles the fabric of your dress, the soothing movement calming your raging hormones.

Laying your head to rest on his shoulder, you breathe in the familiar pinewood scent of his cologne. “I didn’t mean to leave things like that. I wanted to reply to your text, I wanted to answer your phone calls but I guess I just chickened out.”

“It’s fine, Y/N. Really.” Steve presses a kiss to your temple. “How ‘bout I take you out on a date first? A real date, not just a drink and a shag.”

Steve’s always had a talent for lightening up the mood and you chuckle in agreement. “A real date it is.”

Detaching yourself slowly from Steve’s embrace, you look back at him lovingly. “Let me take you to Luciano’s tomorrow night,” he proposes.

Immediately you put up a verbal fight. “No. No way you’re taking me to Luciano’s. It’s too much, too expensive.”

“It’s not too expensive for me, Y/N. I happen to have a very well-fed bank account.”

“I don’t care.” You take a couple steps back until your back hits the wall. Steve’s baffled expression pains your heart, but you simply can’t accept an offer like that.

“Y/N…,” he tries to change your mind, “I want to take you out on a proper date, a proper dinner. At a place I love and know you’ll love too.”

“The answer is still no, Steve.”

“This isn’t about the money, is it?” He’s starting to look agitated, the tenor of his voice changing to an annoyed tone. “You just don’t wanna go out on a date with me.”

“That’s not true!,” you defend yourself, balling your hands into tight fists. “I just – I guess I’m not used to guys taking me anywhere more fancy than the pizzeria two blocks down.”

“Then I’ll most definitely take you to Luciano’s,” he wets his lips as he speaks tenderly, running a hand through your tousled locks. “You know I won’t be sent away like an errant boy.”

Steve will never take no for an answer and he’s relentless in his pursuit, cornering you with his sculpted body, towering over you with a curious look in his eyes. Linking his forehead with yours, he cups your face with one hand whilst the other rests against the wall, preventing you from slipping past him.

“Please, baby,” he whispers to your lips and you know you’re a goner. He softly but tentatively brushes his lips to yours in a chaste kiss and your entire body sighs against him, leaning into his broad frame with the utmost ease. He’s familiar, everything about him is familiar. From the way he calls you his baby to the way he makes love to you at night.

“Okay,” you mumble in between little kisses to your skin, all the way from your jaw, down your throat to the nape of your neck. “I’ll let you take me to Luciano’s.”

“7 p.m.?,” he asks while nibbling on your sweet spot. You hum something between a yes and a moan, falling from your lips like a sermon to his touch. “I heard you did great today. Delivering the big boss’ baby,” he praises your latest achievement, hiking up your dress little by little until your fingers stop him.

“I was awesome today,” you grin smugly, “But I still have a last-minute consultation to head to, so I’m afraid we won’t have time to… blow off some steam.”

His pupils blow up in both lust and surprise. “A consultation? Now?”

“Apparently she only wanted to speak to me. Said only the best is good enough for her and that I’m the best.”

He squeezes your hips gently before releasing you, pouting slightly. “Off you go, then.”

With a goodbye kiss, you make your way to your office, just in time to sit down in your desk chair when there’s a soft knock on your door. Your assistant, Darcy, carefully opens the door and tells you your last appointment has arrived.

“Send her in,” you reply kindly and Darcy opens the door a bit more to let a blonde woman in, dressed entirely in designer clothing with a Prada handbag dangling from her arm. She sits down with a certain poise, collected and composed to the bone. She screams money from head to toe, probably her daddy’s or her husband’s money.

It isn’t until you hear her voice that you recognise her.

“Y/N, darling, it’s good to see you again.”

The velvety tone is unmistakable. The new hair colour threw you off at first, but now it’s as clear as day. The eyes of a snake, as deep as a bottle of liquor. The strictly-business approach to every single movement of her slim yet trained body.

“Natasha,” you drawl out with the utmost dismay. “Natasha Romanova. Long time, no see.” You give her a hard look and a once-over. “Weren’t you supposed to be a red-head?”

There’s a haughty smile playing on her lips. “My husband has a thing for blondes.”

It’s then that you spot the golden band around her ring finger, her hand neatly resting on her swollen stomach. Not wanting to continue the staring contest, and in an attempt to evade her scrutinising gaze, you start up your computer and look at her file.

“Your due date is in… five weeks?” Natasha nods in confirmation. “And you’ve chosen not to know whether it’s a boy or a girl,” you read in a monotone voice. “Your residence is in the Hamptons, so why come all this way to Manhattan?”

“My husband works here,” she replies as if she expected you to already know the answer, raising a sculpted eyebrow at you. “And like I already said, I want only the best of my child.”

“So you conveniently end up here.” At this point, her ability to keep a perfect composure is starting to annoy you, unabashedly glaring daggers at the woman in front of you.

“Look, Y/N,” she briefly purses her lips in thought. “I’m not here to pick a fight. I’m here for my child. I’m not fit for travel anymore and I certainly didn’t plan on staying in Manhattan for any longer than necessary. But unforeseen circumstances have brought me to you.”

She sounds sincere and it’s always possible something unexpected has come up. But you don’t want to get involved in her drama once more, so you decide to focus on the matter at hand itself, casually inquiring about the whereabouts of her husband.

“He’s not very keen on all this baby stuff. James will eventually attend the main event, but everything else is just secondary to him,” she replies casually though with a little spite.

The way she forms her sentences and carefully chooses her words rings a couple alarm bells inside your head. “If you don’t mind me being forward, but…” Her eyes lock with yours as her hands gently rub her baby bump. “Do you want this child or not? If you don’t, there are always options. We can discuss those now or later, whatever suits you.”

She holds up a manicured finger. “Hold it,” she albeit commands you and you have to bite your tongue to hold back an equally pointed response. “I did not plan on getting pregnant. Ever. I don’t like kids, as you might already know. But my husband James does… And this child is very important to him, even though he doesn’t always say or show it.”

Whatever little sympathy you still had left for this woman, you pour into your next words. “I’m sorry to hear that, Natasha. I’ll do my best to take care of your baby.”

And that is not a lie. To you, there’s nothing more adorable or more significant than children. Even though their parents might not be the nicest people on earth, they can’t help it that they’re born into a certain family with a certain background.

“Anyway,” she sniffs a little, “I already made another appointment with your assistant for an ultrasound.” Natasha gets up from her seat and gives me a stiff wave of her hand, accompanied with a tight-lipped smile. “I’ll see you in a fortnight.”

Her heels click against the floor and I cringe at the sharp sound. Just as she’s about to turn the doorknob, she throws a sideway glance at me, her eyes burning holes in my body. “You know, Y/N, I’ve always wondered what happened to you.” My eyes flit to meet her scorning gaze and I swallow thickly. “But it seems you ended up alright. You got to be a doctor in a certain way, just like your daddy dearest. That’s what you always wanted, isn’t it?”

Her voice is belittling, as if she’s only dealing with some small manners she can quickly take care of. As if you are just a formality to her. That’s the way it’s always been, that’s the way she’ll always look at you. As if you’re just an extra in the Great Natasha Romanova Musical.

“Yes, you’re right.” You reach for the water bottle sitting on the edge of your desk and as you screw off the cap, you can see her gloating from the corner of your eye. One more victory for Natasha. Some people never change, don’t they?

“Oh, apropos,” she adds in a fake-innocent tone, looking down at her manicured hands and hot pink nails, tracing the heartlines of her hands. “Since we were talking about babies anyway… How’s yours?”

Part 2

Tagging: @avengerofyourheart @a-little-hell-to-raise @marvelingatthewonder @mrshopkirk @hardcorehippos @knittingknerdy @winterboobaer @italwaysendsinafightt @viollettes @myserium @feelmyroarrrr @justareader @austinamelio @volklana @4theluvofall @bovaria @themcuhasruinedme @theoneandonlysaucymo @caplanbuckybarnes @nenyakj @amrita31199 @emilyevanston @minervaem @howlingbarnes @buchananbarnestrash @youandb @you-and-bucky @fvckingsteverogers @thatawkwardtinyperson @that-sokovian-bastard @abovethesmokestacks @marvelrevival @marvel-fanfiction @justanotherbuckydevotee @barnes-heaven @heartmade-writingbucky @buckyywiththegoodhair @captnbarnesrogers @mellifluous-melodramas @its-not-a-phase-hux @melconnor2007 @ivvitm1109 @toofuckinfabulous @ailynalonso15 @jurassicbarnes @hollycornish @delicatecapnerd @camigt1999 @learisa @curlyexpat @palaiasaurus64 @fanndas-snow-goddess @crisssivonne @yourenotrogers

Onsra tag list: @itsjaynebird @melavale @debzybrazy @supernaturaldean67 @tomboyk @shadowhunter7 @allyp1023 @sophiedarting @movingonto-betterthings @magicintheelements @seeyainanothalifebrotha @redroomproperty @dsny87 @aquabrie @shortiiqt16 @mmauricee @lost-in-the-stories @ourdreamsrealized @aletheladyinred @mileysebschmidt

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ravnicaforgoblins · 5 years ago

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Ravnica for Goblins

Ladies of Ravnica

Dungeon Masters running a campaign in Ravnica may start to notice a trend with many of the city’s most powerful figures of authority (or notoriety); they are largely women.

Whether this an intentional choice on the part of WOTC for gender equality or purely accidental, most of Ravnica is run by the ladies. Not only do we see equal numbers of each gender represented within each race, each class, and each guild (except the Gruul Clans for some reason), but even a large number of the Guildmasters are/have been female:

Isperia, Sphinx Guildmaster of Azorius Senate

Lavinia, (acting Human Guildmaster of Azorius Senate following Isperia’s death)

Aurelia, Angel Guildmaster of Boros Legion

Feather, (former Angel Guildmaster of Boros Legion)

Razia, (Angel Founder/Parun of Boros Legion)

Vraska, (acting Medusa Guildmaster of Golgari Swarm following Jarad’s death)

Kaya, (official Human Guildmaster of Orzhov Syndicate following death of Obzedat)

Teysa, (unofficial Human Guildmaster of Orzhov Syndicate follow death of Obzedat)

Trostani, Dryad Guildmaster(s) of Selesnya Conclave

Zegana, Merfolk Guildmaster/Prime Speaker of Simic Combine

Vannifar, Hybrid Guildmaster/Prime Speaker of Simic Combine

In addition to this, every Angel and Medusa on the plane is exclusively female, with no exceptions. What does this mean for DMs plotting a Ravnica campaign? It means in all likelihood you’re going to be working on more female voices than male, so get practicing. If you are born a girl, this will be easier for you. If you’re born a guy, you’ve got some work to do. Because if you want to take a hard stance against doing female voices in your campaign, you are likely depriving your players the chance to interact with some of the coolest, most badass NPCs in all of Ravnica.

Lavinia of the Azorius Senate is an icon for the guild’s ideals, a champion for the laws of Ravnica, and steward of Jace Beleren, the Living Guildpact. Everything Jace wants to do with his nigh-limitless power as the embodiment of Ravnican Society has to pass through Lavinia first. She dictates his schedules, official commandments, and public appearances. Most importantly, Lavinia ensures that the most is made of the limited time the frequently-absent Guildpact is around. She is harsh but fair. A great choice for when the DM needs to intervene to save the players.

Judith the Scourge Diva is the Grand Dame of the Cult of Rakdos, it’s most in-demand performer, and the last word on anything that goes on backstage. She has more to do with the day-to-day goings-on than Rakdos himself, as the hedonistic demon Guildmaster rarely attends performances and often spends weeks, months, or even years in his lava pit. She does most of the work while Rakdos claims the adoration of the guild’s fanatics, cultists, and performers. Dramatic, demanding, devoted, demented, and she’s got a thing for blades & blood. She is the closest thing to a ranking member of the chaotic guild of stylized hedonism and carnage that is the Cult of Rakdos. She can be reasoned with.

Massacre Girl is currently the Azorius Senate’s number one fugitive.

Real Name: Unknown

Guild: Rakdos

Allegiance: Herself

Motive: Unknown

Crimes: Murders in every guild, including her own

Signature: High body counts, high-ranking figures, excessive violence

Perks for PCs: Instant Citywide Notoriety for taking her in/down

Drawbacks for PCs: Almost Certain Death for failing to take her in/down

Teysa Karlov, former Grand Envoy of Orzhov Syndicate, currently imprisoned for attempting to overthrow Ghost Council. Teysa is one of the few members of the Syndicate who isn’t motivated by greed or self-interest. Make no mistake, Teysa is as ambitious as they come, but her interests actually extend outside of her guild. She is one of the only high-ranking figures within her guild who actually tries to establish relationships with other guilds. It has dawned on her that the day may come when the Orzhov Syndicate might require the assistance of the other guilds, so maybe, just maybe, they should try to not have every other guild actively despise them. A groundbreaking proposal, the first step of which involved the overthrowing of the Greedy Old Men, aka the Obzedat, and establishing her as new guildmaster. Unfortunately, Grandfather Karlov outplayed her, and both Teysa and her ally Tajic of the Boros Legion were thrown in jail. Tajic was bailed out, but Teysa remains imprisoned thanks to bribes made with high-ranking officials to keep her so. In addition, to keep her from dying and achieving freedom as a ghost, she’s been fed food to magically lengthen her life in prison. All that said, Teysa is the best ally available within the Orzhov, one of the few not morally bankrupt, and knows the laws of Ravnica better than even the Azorius. A perfect choice for a prison break quest.

Emmara Tandris is one of the most well-known faces within the endless bounty that is the Selesnya Conclave. She’s a childhood friend of Jace Beleren, the Living Guildpact, and a public figure for inter-guild cooperations. This, plus the fact that she is a kind & caring individual with a special gift with animals, fey, and elementals, and the fact that Selesnya’s dryad trio Guildmaster(s) Trostani are vague at best, completely silent at worst, makes her a perfect choice for distributing missions, quests, and animal companions.

Last NPC I’ll mention is Vraska, of the Golgari Swarm. Vraska is the Planeswalker Medusa Assassin Pirate Queen of the Undercity. Think of something cooler than that, I dare you. It doesn’t exist.

*Edit: More Kickass Female NPCs!

Etrata, the Silencer. That name alone should inspire fear. Not just a vampire, not just an assassin, she’s more of an urban legend Boros soldiers tell each other about when they get stuck on overnight guard duty and want to spook their buddy. Lacking the tedious mind games of most House Dimir operatives, Etrata is an old-school killer for hire. She cares neither for politics, nor influence, nor subtlety. Your name shows up in her book, you’re gonna die tonight. She’s the only Dimir agent capable of actually challenging Lazav for his position of Guildmaster. What it will come down to is this; is he smarter than she is deadly? Etrata is great because her exploits are much easier to track than other Dimir. If someone is dead from a vampire bite in a locked room, they’ve just had a visit from Etrata.

Izoni, Thousand-Eyed should honestly have been the Golgari Guildmaster. Not only is she infinitely more interesting and distinctive than the run-of-the-mill Lich Jarad Vod Savo, but she embodies the Swarm in a way Jarad just doesn’t. Scuttling by your feet, buzzing around the air, lurking wherever death can be found; Izoni and her ever-present insect swarms have presence. Jarad, on the other hand, has a bow, very little personality, and the only real accomplishment he’s had as Guildmaster is surviving assassination attempts. Which, let’s be honest, for the Golgari, is just par for the course. Izoni has room to grow, to expand, and she’s exactly the sort of cackling, nasty, power-hungry dark witch players like to fight. Except she somehow makes being covered in bugs hot.

Pierakor az Vinrenn D’Rav, better known as “Feather”, was the Boros Guildmaster before Aurelia, and a former Wojek Officer. Her wings were bound and she was forced to serve in the Wojek for some reason that hasn’t been explained, then when the original Guildmaster and Parun Razia was slain, Feather stepped up. Her reign was short-lived when Aurelia challenged her as unfit to serve as Guildmaster given her unspoken crime that she was charged for however long ago. Feather gave up the mantle and left Ravnica, going into a self-imposed exile in the lawless Red Wastes beyond the Rubblebelt. Basically, this means that there is a Guildmaster-Level NPC living all alone in the most savage wilds on the entire plane searching for redemption. The story is literally just sitting there, waiting to be written.

#ravnica for goblins #ravnica #ladies #ladies of ravnica #vraska #judith the scourge diva #emmara tandris #massacre girl #lavinia #teysa karlov #dnd #d&d #dungeons and dragons #etrata #izoni #feather

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samdukewieland · 5 years ago

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Stuck Inside Media Diary Week 4

On my birthday I made a 100 song playlist for myself with the criteria of choosing my Top 20 favorite bands/musicians, five songs from their catalog-preferably only one song per album-and that was it. This was part-exercise-part-how-do-I-celebrate-myself-and-my-excellently-unique-tastes-on-the-one-day-this-is-allowed. I had already gone through the painstakingly unasked for “challenge” of whittling down of a Top 5 for a project in college and it’s gone unchanged in the past four years, and being the way that I am, I am generally always considering what the Top 10 would be. Anything beyond Top 10 is egregious, but because I was deeply unsatisfied with a 25 song playlist, I just kept going until I settled on 20 and 100.

It then dawned on me (I couldn’t sleep that night, BIRTHDAY JITTERS and all that) afterwards that this is technically a list of what I’d consider to be the top 100 songs and that was just all wrong. I love every song on that playlist; I chose obvious songs and I chose obscure deep cuts that would make yer average me chuckle and say “heh, that one huh?” But if I were asked to make a list of the 100 greatest songs ever recorded, I don’t think I could leave off something like “Hey Jude” (The Beatles) or “Wonderful World” (Sam Cooke) or “The Champ” (Ghostface Killah) and yet I did. What a dweeb.

Sunday, April 12

Starship Troopers, Verhoeven 1997

Listen, I love Paul Verhoeven. This is my least favorite Paul Verhoeven movie and it’s still incredible. And it’s a me issue too (though, I’m not taking all the blame here-this obvious issues here are that there’s no good actor here besides Michael Ironside, Jake Busey and Neil Patrick Harris), though I think that’s part of the point of it. Or at the very least there’s been enough revisionist history and nostalgia slapped onto this thing that Denise Richards gets a pass-“well yeh, she’s bad on purpose” they’ll say; this movie is lemonade.

Three Busy Debras, “Sleepover!”

Probably the biggest difference between Three Busy Debras and Stella (which is what Three Busy Debras reminds me of the most) is that Stella was so unconcerned about saying anything about anything. This is not a knock on Debras, not in the least bit, but that’s ultimately what I landed on when I was thinking about the two next to each other. Three Busy Debras is very good and very, very funny and reminds me of one of my favorite television comedies to ever exist.

Beef House, “Boro”

When I went and saw Tim And Eric’s live tour back in January they were going to show the first episode of Beef House after the main show, but then they surprised us by having John C. Reilly come out as Steve Brule and do a bit with an audience member for like 15 minutes, probably less time. Watch Beef House if you like Tim and Eric, but you already know that if you do.

Joe Pera Talks With You, “Joe Pera Lights Up The Night With You”, “Joe Pera Talks to You About the Rat Wars of Alberta, Canada (1950–Present Day)”

At this point you can tell that I probably just turned on Adult Swim after finishing Starship Troopers and just kept it on, because a Sunday night on Adult Swim is the only thing that could rival an HBO Sunday night. Alright, so I had only ever seen one episode of Joe Pera Talks With You before these two episodes and I liked it fine, but didn’t have great context for it and was probably just not in a great headspace for it. Sure, I liked it fine back when I had watched that episode, but I was not motivated to continue watching it and I didn’t. Until this particular night. I know for sure that I’ll be writing more about it next week, so I’m just going to say now that this makes for incredible “watch before bed” programming.

Mad Men, “Smoke Gets In Your Eyes” [Series Premier]

And thus the great Mad Men re-watch has begun. I’ve only watched this all the way through once and that’s when I got caught up on the DVDs for season 4 back was when I was in high school. This pilot is one of the most pilot-y pilots I’ve seen/re-watched in a long while, and maybe it’s so glaring to me because of what I studied in college and how I just generally spend a lot of my time as a person. But it’s a very old fashioned pilot, maybe the last prestige TV classical pilot? You just don’t see very many shows now that have their first episode be as thirsty for another shot as this one is. Not bad, but more just very in your face.

Monday, April 13

Rashomon, Kurosawa 1950 [this might be available on Criterion-I just DVR’d it]

Baby’s first Kurosawa. This one has really stuck with me, just in its simplicity in telling a story and I’m going to stop talking about it here, one because like we really need another 26-year-old white dude talking about Akira Kurosawa movies and two, should I continue to talk about this movie, I will turn even more into what I hate and who I consider to be my arch-enemies: the film school kids.

Parks And Recreation, “Rock Show” [Season 1 finale]

Whenever I start a Parks re-watch, I always start with “Rock Show.” It’s now just in full fledged Simpsons territory that I wouldn’t be able to tell you how many times I’ve seen certain episodes and that it is incredibly comforting to watch where I can turn off brain while watching, but know exactly when to start re-paying attention because of jokes I like. I don’t know when it’ll be as recognized as The Simpsons (maybe it never will be?) or seen as the true predecessor, but it’ll feel good once it does. Though if there’s a show that demonstrated how irrelevant recognition for hard work was, it was Parks.

Tuesday, April 14

The Wicker Man, Hardy 1973 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

I feel confident that I’ve lied to friends of mine about having seen this movie. Pretty easy to do, considering it’s a pretty straight forward story and you can get by with saying stuff like “I mean yeh, it’s just like a pretty fucked up movie.” And it is! on both accounts. Though I guess not as unsettling as I figured it would be, but as soon as the animal masks come out I did get squirmy. That and choir singing folk music with vaguely disturbing lyrics juxtaposed over not totally right images-it’s like the opposite feeling when someone uses “Perfect Day” too ironically.

Better Call Saul, “Bad Choice Road”

Kim. Wexler. I guess what I love about Vince Gilligan is that he zags (though zagging in this case is kind of old fashioned) and saves his big thing to happen for a season’s finale and not the penultimate episode. But he doesn’t rob you of a wild penultimate episode either-just kind of nice and takes confidence.

Parks And Recreation, “Pawnee Zoo”

Wednesday, April 15

Obvious Child, Robespierre 2014 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

Got sick Wednesday night, ralphed twice!, and needed something I absolutely didn’t have to think about. I had started watching this probably like a year and a half ago in a waiting room while my mom was getting some kind of dental procedure done and had never picked it back up after putting 20 minutes down. It’s good, though I think it resonates better for other people than it did with me, but that’s no knock. Loved very dialed in Gaby Hoffmann and it feels like Max Silvestri mighta supposed to originally have the Jake Lacy part, but Jake Lacy is contractually obligated to play this sort of part whenever it is written into existence every year or so. Tough break.

Parks And Recreation, “The Stake Out”

Thursday, April 16

Targets, Bogdanovich 1968

I caught this recommendation from....I think Matt Singer on twitter and also @nextontcm (which is a first tier twitter follow) and man, this thing is great! I forgot that Bogdanovich comes from the Roger Corman school of directing, but ole Rog doesn’t let you forget with this one. It’s a movie I would imagine Steven Soderbergh really likes (and I say that, because The Limey is the only other movie that I know of that uses another movie’s footage in reference to one of the characters in the movie-like I’m sure there’s other, I haven’t seen every movie, leave me alone). TCM’s apparently doing a podcast series on Bogdanovich, which is kind of weird, but he did a short interview with Ben Mankiewicz afterwards and it was hilarious, because surprising no one, Peter Bogdanovich really doesn’t give a shit about what he says anymore.

Top Chef, Season 17 episode 5

This was the first time in Jen’s Top Chef career where she didn’t fall victim to the yips, which shows progress. But it’s also helping make the case that Jen Carroll might be the worst evaluated draftee in all of Top Chef? That sounds harsh, and I have no doubt that Jen Carroll is phenomenal, this just doesn’t seem to be her strength; there’s no rule that says competitive people have to always be good at what they get competitive about.

Mad Men, “Ladies Room”, “Marriage Of Figaro”

It’s weird seeing Don not as partner, but just a dude who’s really good at his job that people respect, but is also not in charge of everything and doesn’t aspire to be in charge of everything. Though not without trying to be in control of everything. I haven’t watched this since I was in high school, so I’ve both forgotten a lot of stuff and also just like know more about life and characters and didn’t realize how sad of a character Pete is. Man, Vincent Karheiser really doesn’t get enough credit for how good he is as Pete Campbell, a character who could’ve easily been just another Christopher Moltisanti (full disclosure: Christopher is in contention for favorite Sopranos character) and is so much sadder in a different way.

However, I’m still just dumb guy, and maybe that’s not the complete reason, but there’s some Betty stuff that is just like not very interesting. I think if they had gone down an avenue of “let’s try and radicalize her with Kennedy” story, that would’ve worked better than other stuff, but I don’t know. Betty’s complicated! But that she has to be the character that bridges Glen’s story to the main one is incredibly detrimental.

Friday, April 17

Parks And Recreation, “Beauty Pagent”

Brooklyn Nine-Nine, “Ransom”

Every season needs at least one Cheddar episode. This is not at all a controversial opinion, but it’s worth saying out loud in case anyone thought differently.

Big Night, Scott & Tucci 1995 [as of now this is available on Amazon Prime]

When Ian Holm isn’t running away with this, Isabella Rossellini (Big Beef and Cheddar in hand) is and when Isabella Rossellini isn’t running away with this, Minnie Driver is and when Minnie Driver isn’t running away with this, Tucci and Sheloub just keep passing it back and forth to each other while Liev Schreiber just silently stares at them from afar. This is a fantastic way to spend a Friday evening.

Mad Men, “New Amsterdam”, “5G”

Saturday, April 18

Parks And Recreation, “Practice Date”, “Sister City”, “Kaboom”

“Practice Date” is the first “modern” episode of Parks. “Sister City” feels like one they had drafted for S1 and just couldn’t figure out how to get it in there (it’s definitely not a bad episode, but it feels way more like steps backward than forward). “Kaboom” is a wonderfully silly episode and a great debut for Aisha Muharrar (who is a Tier 1 Parks writer-please don’t ask me to rank them).

Defiance, Zwick 2008 [as of now this is available on Netflix]

I had never watched this movie, because in the back of my head I’ve always suspected it would be real dumb and bad, because a WWII movie with Daniel Craig and Liev Schreiber, on paper, should be something people talk about more, but nah, this thing’s real dumb and bad. But not even fun-bad, just forgettable bad. It’s dumb-guy-Munich.

Mad Men, “Babylon”, “Red In The Face”, “The Hobo Code”, “Shoot”

The Dick Whitman childhood really suffers from Al Swearengen just having a much better “raised by whores” story and also you can tell that Matthew Weiner thinks he’s doing important work by writing this stuff. And not to sound like a blog from 2007-2015, but Rachel really was the perfect match for Draper, holy shit. It’s also this stretch of episodes where Peggy starts to shine and Elizabeth Moss is definitely someone I take for granted, because I don’t really have to think about how good she is, because I know she’s good, but man she is really good at playing Peggy Olson. What an MVP.

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