#BUT ALSO BITCH I PUT SO GIVING MUCH EFFORT INTO THAT
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pont pont vesszĹcske
#this year just feels weird. im selfishly not saying ~rawr so awful or tragic#because there are things ive achieved this year that im proud of and that were long due#im so happy i did that masters course and im so glad i landed a job that pays well even though its torture on my nerveous system#my mind is forever free from academic guilt and pressure#and i can afford things that nourish my soul and body when they werent accessible before#so this is the firm acknowledgment of the fact that im lucky and have an objectively good life#part of which i was given and nice parts i actually worked my ass off for#and for the first time in my life im at a stage where its all ⌠freestyle?? lmao like ok girl you did the things now find new things to do#and theres none hehehe just human connections that are harder to build than a cv or a thesis defense and doesnt only depend#on the effort i put in#but also on how the stars and planets are moving or idk#plus i just remembered how my sister told me that the reason why i kept procrastinating on my diploma was bc it was an excuse to not grow u#and now the universe is kicking my ass all year to make me realize that i need to change and grow and build a life i could settle in#because this bitch!!!! took 3 of my 4 closest friends and made them move countries and get married or in one case just simply get over me#and not to make everything about me but its how humans work okay so ofc im internalizing a lot of other tragedies as new signs#from the universe screaming at me#to get away from the parasocial bonds that give me so much joy but also affect me too much#like LAUGH AT ME all you want but ive been wanting to see ts live since 2009#and the only thing that kept me up in exam season at 4am was me and my friend sending outfit inspos to each other#like its silly i know but when that show got cancelled and i was hysterical i kneew the lesson was to grow up and stop investing so much#into lovely but also relatively short moments of my life#because i should be able to#look forward to other things after graduating than the eras tour but i WASNT okay#and i dont have to elaborate on how liamâs passing has been affecting me/us so i wont#but fuck that was a cruel reminder - to make things about me again- that though i can talk about this with friends on my phone#until my retina burns out or melts or idk what retinas do#i still dont have ANYONE in my phsyical proximity who would understand this pain and thats partially on me#and then my 85+yr old grandma got covid AGAIN for the 3rd time and my god she got better but in case i forgot she wont be with me forever#and i reached the tag limit so thats it anyway weird year very weird dont know what it wants from me#to the void
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i donât know how else to tell people that the problem with Leightonâs story isnât Leightonâs story, for which I would love to be so proud of her, but that it simply wasnât written well
iâm sorry yâall canât âTatum was meant to represent this!!!â and âLeighton has realized that!!â your way out of this when the writing simply did not put in any of the effort. also lmao you wanna know why Iâm salty over Tatumâs treatment? cause how she ended was literally not what theyâd been writing for 3 episodes. not once did Leighton look like Tatum was reminding her of bad parts of herself, not once prior to the fundraiser was Tatum anything but chill, supportive, and into Leighton for exactly who she was
it just feels so cheap and like Iâm still happy for Leighton and happy for yâall if you can run with poor writing but I simply cannot tolerate it, I have to hold the show to higher standards than Leighton kissing any girl at any given moment in time
#okay now I've reeeeeally said piece#so i'll only be reiterating through asks#but goddam forgive me if i want tslocg's writing to be better than glee's lmao#y'all are giving the writing too much credit that it doesn't deserve basically#the only reason i'm so gung ho about tatum is because of WHAT THEY GAVE US FOR THREE EPS#talk about misdirection#cause then they rip it away for a storyline that doesn't work without the effort put into it#tatum you remind me of everything I want to change about myself đ¤#bitch WHERE you've never given any signs that that was the case#feels like there are missing scenes here oooor just pure bad spacing and laziness on the writers part#trust me i do not like being mad at writers of shows i like#alas#someone has to lol#but since i really do not know how else to say this now that was it#tslocg#leighton murray#leighton x tatum#tatum tslocg#fuck me i guess for thinking the writing was consistent#also to note i have no beef with alicia she's fine whatever#but you cannot tell me this was a story well told#okay someone take the tags away from me
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#good fucking god#im hanging out w my mom and i remember why i dont love hanging out with my mom#she gives in to toxic diet culture and is a huge reason why my relationship with food is so fucked upppp#minding my business making myself a rice bowl w sweet potato and avocado w miso tahini dressing đ¤đ¤#and unprompted shes like#âim on a new diet i cant eat any of those things i can only have 200 calories per meal#i miss avocado so much but iâd rather be skinnyâ#im like BITCH????????#thanks for sharing and also that ânutrition centerâ u went to and bought a bunch of frozen food from is a scam#once u stop eating their special food they upsell you then ur gonna gain it all back i hate to break it to you#and also the key to losing weight is to exercise enough to offset what you eat#she does not exercise at all.#she made me fuckin weigh myself in front of her the other day and when she saw the number she was like âthats not that badâ#HELLO??????#is she trying to give me another ed? cuz her saying that is exactly how i developed an ed 7 years ago :-)#losing my mind actually#ive genuinely put in so much work and its such a conscious and constant effort to not fall back into those patterns#and here i am holding back tears while i try to finish eating
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đŚ
#now the pros&cons of how all my health trials&tribulations have effected me&my mental state can be debated ad infinitum lmao#but one solid con is that unless i absolutely want to do something/it is required for my survival+halfway decent function/#im in a good mood or the moon is full or the milky way is overhead#i will say that i would rather be dead than bother&i will mean it 1000% lmao.#me+death played chicken&now hes my bitch&theres just no going back to that being the worst case scenerio lmao.#the obvious downside to this being that much like a toddler or badly trained german shepard i must constantly find new ways#to entertain myself&things to act as a carrot bc the stick no longer matters lmao.#... im having severe Issues convincing myself going thru the new med adjustment is worth my effort. lmao.#but like i also think it would be a waste to give up on life in full blown dramatics w the summer here&the sun looking so nice.#so theres definitely that.#(my dog is staring at me like 'you know youre overreacting to nothing'&im like 'yeah but if i were reacting to Things it wouldnt be#overreacting now would it'&shes like 'see this is why they put you on the crazy drugs. stop talking to your dog.')
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And now, a brief look at the human fucker community on a monster version of tumblr
đ WetterThanYou Follow
It's so sad that humans can't breathe underwater, makes bringing them to my lair so much harder
đşAscetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow
Was anyone going to tell me humans can't breathe underwater or was I supposed to just learn that from a text post?
đWetterThanYou Follow
Please tell me you didn't seriously look at humans and go 'they look like they can breathe underwater'
đşAscetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow
I thought they were like lions and how some live in the sea :(
đŚBEaST-MAN Follow
DID YOU THINK SEA LIONS WERE LITERAL LIONS?!
đşAscetic-more-like-ass-cetic Follow
They're not? đđđ
(10,053 Notes)
đşHereWolf Follow
Vampires will be like 'I love humans' and then transform every human they know into another vampire. Weak. You are like someone who only watches Marvel movies and calls themselves a filmbuff.
đBatass Follow
Hey OP this is an important part of many vampire cultures so you should tone it down because this is really offensive.
đşHereWolf Follow
You should get a culture that isn't fucking lame.
đŚBEaST-MAN Follow
OP you are literally a werewolf. And into throwing stones in glass houses I guess.
đşHereWolf Follow
Gurl you don't know the amount of effort I put into keeping my human girlfriend a human girlfriend because I love her for being a human.
(8,000 Notes)
đCraftedLove Follow
In the club on a date with a human straight up breaking it. And by 'it,' haha, well. Let's just say. His sanity.
(42,069 Notes)
đ§ââď¸ Crystal-Rooster-and-Orbs Follow
Sick of getting added to group chats like 'plots to overthrow our lieges.' Yes, I am both an evil wizard and an evil vizier. But I'm not plotting any treachery because my king is also evil, and so is my queen. We are in an evil polycule and give each other evil night kisses.
đ§ââď¸ Crystal-Rooster-and-Orbs Follow
Also stop telling me about the evil queen's OnlyFans like the king and I aren't helping her run it. Who do you think is taking the pictures? You have no idea how many evil yet deeply impractical schemes it's given us the economic cushion to do.
(48,835 Notes)
đ¤źââď¸Bitch-of-Heracles Follow
Need me a human who will hold me like this and just destroy me đ
âŁď¸HeraclesOfficialâ
Follow
Hey.
đ¤źââď¸Bitch-of-Heracles Follow
WHY DID NOBODY THINK TO WARN ME HERACLES WAS ON THIS WEBSITE?!
(33,333 Notes)
This now has a sequel, and a third act
#shhh evil wizards can be monsters if they want to#oc#yes this is the same loose world as the demon king posting in fact the evil wizard is the one mentioned as being his friend#stole this format from a fire emblem post because it was a great post#monster fucker#but inverted#Heracles jumpscare#dashboard simulator
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look i love making sae be the one who's so in love and showering hajun with so much love and affection but it's much more fun to think that HE fell harder than her
#it's the she fell first he fell harder thing. gooodd hjs have such common dynamic the frustrating and infuriating type#like look at first she have a crush on him right but as a model. that girl is literally a moth she gets attracted by those with light#though at first she admires him as a model and knew him through toma- her kamioshi. though i think... she just starts admiring him a lot?#she literally went through a 'highschool crush' phase but late since she was like. at college đ#observed him... wow he's a lot similar to her than she thought. that guy puts up a smile in front of strangers and keep people at a distanc#he looked... strangely alone. why? even though he have friends too. she saw herself in hajun and... didnt want to be like him#will she keep putting up a face too? will she keep lying to herself? and would that make her alone in the end as well? she didnt want that.#so shes like yknow what? let's be shameless. her friends had been so loving of her unconditionally.#she thought that they'll leave after highschool and yet... and yet they stayed. they keep approaching her.#and come to think of it... they're always the ones giving effort for her right? when it comes to planning for hang outs-#they're always the one to reach out. never her. shouldnt she return the favor then? love them as much as they love her#pour all her heart out. she used to do it- she can do it again. love people unconditionally without expecting anything from them.#surely this time it'd be different. surely it wont drain her. even if there's a chance they'll leave her- it doesnt matter now.#she knows she gave her everything and that's enough for her. maybe she'll feel better if she had realized this when she was a child...#but that's okay now! so for now! lesson learned: dont be hajun#but also sae. just have a different view of hajun in her head đ??? like she admits she didnt really know hajun before but actually meeting#him must be so complicated for her lol like this guy used to be her crush! and she got to talk to him but holy shit he's lowkey an assholeđ#not even lowkey but he really is a bitch lmfaaooo so like. damn 'i forgot i used to have a crush on this guy like i used to like him???'#'in what way??? (his looks dont even deny it sweetie)' i think her crush on him in the past made her more snappy towards him now lmfao#like 'gooooddd i used to have a crush on THIS GUY??? that's making me piiisseedd' LMAAAOOO đđ#i genuinely have NOOOOO idea how they started having this dynamic but it's just. them lowkey insulting each other? not really INSULT insult#but rather bickering masked by politeness? like đ˘^^) (^^đ˘ selfish ohime-sama vs black hearted prince#but the one who's usually losing here would be sae ngl and hajun's mostly the one being playful tho tbf they CAN calmly talk to each other#sometimes they just become competitive? sae herself is a competitive one at first it would be 'oho~ let's see how long he can keep this up~#to 'give up already!!!! my social battery isn't gonna last long!!!!!!!!' and hajun's just watching her lose it every time đđ#ah.... my absolutely pathetic daughter im so sorry..... when it comes to him she gets unreasonably annoyed. just who does he think he is?#and yet she can't even feel arrogant around him. she knows bae are on a different league than her. that's why despite being very friendly a#expressing her admiration towards them she still puts up a barrier around them? it's not that deep she have her own close friends#yumeshipping â hajusae [prri]
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Giving up
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: Coaxing your neighbor into having sex with you although he's unsure since he's much, much older than you
Warnings: big ass unspecified age-gap, Jackson!Joel is a softie Smut| unprotected piv, crempie, insicure!joel, sub!joel, also my man has trouble lasting cause he's not done this in a very long time.
a/n:i needed to write some cheesy romantic stuff, and maybe it doesn't really make all that sense in this story and maybe i cried while writing this cause no one is ever gonna love me like this but so what bitch leave me alone (i also am i lil tipsy as i proofread this, so ignore any mistakes pls)
Part 1
"did you do something to your hair?"
Tommy was standing on Joel's doorstep, looking at him as if he were an alien.
"I washed 'em" he grumbled, "what do you want?"
His brother couldn't help but huff out a laugh
"someone's in a good mood today"
"I've gotta be somewhere, just tell me what you want"
Tommy's interest was only piqued more.
there stood his brother, his clothes perfectly clean- maybe even ironed- his hair... styled, his beard trimmed...
something was definitely going on.
"Where are you going?"
Joel rolled his eyes now, shooting his little brother a death glare
"none of your business"
Oh he knew what was going on...
"Who is she?"
"Tommy-"
"Is it Jessica? I bet 's Jessica, she's always flirting with you you ol' dog-"
Joel swore he was gonna punch him- he was already running late because of how long he took to pick his clothes- finding a flannel that wasn't completely worn out turned out to be real fucking hard.
He felt stupid for how much effort he'd put into getting ready, he felt stupid for how anxious he was, but most of all... he wanted his brother to go away.
"There ain't no one, Tommy- now, if there ain't anything you need, please go-"
But just then- just when he was finally going to get rid of him, your sweet, soft voice made its way to his ears.
"Hi Joel! Hi Tommy!" You smiled from your porch, waving your hand at him and his brother "You didn't forget about today, did you Joel?"
What in the actual fuck?
Tommy did a double-check, looking between you and his brother, and when he finally confirmed that it was actually him you were talking to, you whom he'd gotten all dolled up for, he couldn't do anything but let out a slow, long breath.
"No I didn't- I'll be there in a minute, darlin'!" Joel was answering you as his brother regained his ability to speak
"well... Fuck. Me" he was in awe, his voice barely a murmur
"it ain't like that" Joel was quick to intervene "'m just fix-"
"'m sure it ain't" Tommy let out a chuckle, his hand going to pat his brother's back "You fucking lucky bastard"
"Tommy I know she's young bu-"
"shut up man" he laughed "Just go have fun, you asshole"
__ __
"Sorry 'm late, Tommy was just-"
You smiled at his words, shaking your head
"It's ok, Joel" you cooed as you let him in,
He gave you a soft little smile, and you felt like the luckiest girl in the world.
Joel Miller didn't smile just at anyone.
"water?" you asked, leading him to the kitchen.
"Uhm- sure"
His heart was damn near beating out of his chest already- for no fucking reason at all.
Well except the obvious one... you'd sucked his dick and he'd eaten you out three days ago- and you'd made it clear you wanted more.
Jesus Christ, he felt like a fourteen-year-old with his first crush.
You watched him as he sipped on the glass.
"So?" a soft smirk was caged between your teeth "Did you think about it?"
He damn near choked.
Which didn't make any sense, he was expecting this, he already knew you'd ask.
He cleared his throat, diverting his eyes from you "I-I have"
"And?"
You'd gotten closer, your expectant eyes studying every inch of his face
pleasepleasepleaseplease say yes
"Did- didn't you have something that needed fixing?"
Oh for fuck's sake
"joel" you called for him in what almost sounded like a plead.
"darlin' just... lemme fix your cabinet first"
This man was gonna be the goddamn death of you.
"ok"
__ __ __
As it turns out, in many different ways.
Who knew watching him fix something would turn out to be so fucking hot?
He'd rolled his shirt up so that his strong forearms and a glimpse of his beautiful bite-worthy biceps were showing, his hands moved so very expertly that they couldn't help but bring back memories of what those same fingers had done to you just a few days ago, and his face... he looked so hot when he was all in his head, concentrated only on the task before him-
or so you thought.
"You're gonna stare at me the whole time?"
A soft laugh escaped your lips
"don't mind me- just enjoying the view"
He huffed out a laugh as he went back to work, but you couldn't help but notice the fact he pushed his sleeves ever further up his arms, giving you more of a view of his delectable skin.
What a tease
__ __ __
"there we go" he said after some time, opening and closing the cabinet one final time to make sure "all done"
For the record, this time you hadn't even done it on purpose, the cabinet had actually broken. It was like fate was sending you a message.
You awakened from your daydreams as he stood up to his full height, and hopped off the stool you were sitting on to walk closer to him, noticing some dampness in your panties while doing so...
It wasn't your fault... he was the one looking way too hot doing such a simple task.
"thank you" You smiled up at him, your hands going to his chest,
He held his breath for a moment
"'s nothing babygirl"
"yeah? then... you think you could check my bedroom too?" you were biting your lip in a way that made your question take on a whole different meaning "to make sure nothing needs fixing y'know?"
"In your... bedroom?"
"yes, Joel- please" you added, with your best innocent doe eyes.
Which of course made him fold in a matter of seconds.
You'd taken on a different tactic. It was obvious at this point that the man was too shy and too unsure to give you an answer (or the one you wanted to hear anyway), which is why you needed to present him with the actual possibility right in front of him.
And yeah maybe it was manipulative, but fuck it if you didn't wanna feel the man inside of you.
The flashbacks of what he did to you on that bed filled his mind the moment he stepped into the room.
He needed to get a grip or he wouldn't be able to hide his growing bulge in a minute.
"Everything seems right"
"yeah? 'm not sure about the bed" you hummed, desperately hoping he would just go along with it "it makes a weird sound when I get on it"
He turned to you then, his eyes locking with yours for an infinite second.
"try" you said finally, nodding to the bed.
He watched you for a moment longer before, surprising you, he did it- he sat on the bed.
The mattress creaked underneath his weight, and you made quick work of strolling closer to him as he pressed his palms on the bed, checking for the inexistent "weird sound"
"it don't look like there's anythin' wron-" he looked up the moment your hands found his shoulders "Whatcha doin'? sweethear-"
You were sat on his lap before he could even finish the sentence.
"Joel" you spoke his name softly, as if it were a caress, your hands slowly moving up and down from his shoulders to his pecs, as you finally scooted closer to him so your core was right against the hardness in his jeans-
He inhaled sharply, his fingers curling on the bed.
"would you like to have sex with me or not?"
You accentuated your words with a slow roll of your hips, grinding onto him and making a soft groan build inside his throat
"this- this ain't really fair sugar"
A smirk pulled at your lips as you lowered your head to whisper in his ear "I never said I didn't play dirty, Mr. Miller"
Your right hand trailed lower, moving down his belly so slowly that Joel thought he might just lose his mind.
"You're y-young baby-"
Your hand had found his crotch, the outline of his dick fitting in your hand oh so perfectly.
"we've gone over this already Joel, I'm old enough" you purred, your lips leaving a peck just below his ear "old enough to do many many things"
He cursed under his breath
"I just... I don't understand"
A breathy laugh escaped you
"there's not much to understand really" you murmured "You're hot, and I like you, and I wanna get in your pants"
That earned you a chuckle
"and you're sure you won't regret this?" he asked, "you sure this is what you really want- that- that you don't want to give a boy your age a chance instead of me?"
You smiled as you looked up at him,
you'd never met a man so sweet
"Joel, I promise you I'm sure" you whispered "I promise you this is what I want, you are what I want"
Fucking damn it
How could he ever say no after that?
With those gentle eyes of yours looking at him, with your hand right over his cock...
"So?"
He was gonna think about the consequences tomorrow. Now- now there was only you.
"yes"
That single word sounded better than any song you'd ever heard.
yes
Your lips were on his before he could even think of changing his mind- and god did they feel like a dream.
His soft stubble grazed against your cheeks and upper lip, as you deepened the kiss, as he opened up to you, closing his eyes only after he'd taken you in, only after he could admire all that was happening to him for some godforsaken reason.
A growl rumbled from his chest when your core found his dick again, grinding onto it in a way, that combined with the way your tongue was tasting every inch of him, was making him see stars.
He didn't think he'd kissed like this in 30 years,
making out seemed like such a distant thing from him, he was much too old to do something like this, and yet... everything about you made him feel like a teenager all over again, so perhaps it was fitting-
and god he had forgotten how amazing it felt.
You started undoing his flannen, not even dreaming of breaking the kiss, and once you opened his shirt up, once his big strong chest was right there before you, you just had to look at it.
You leaned away, his lips chasing yours making you smile as your gaze lowered.
Jesus, he was the hottest man you'd ever seen.
Some hair and freckles adorned his pecs, his little belly was ever so cutely fighting against his jeans- his skin was soft beneath your palms as they explored every inch they could reach.
He was looking at you, watching your blow-out eyes, wondering what potion you'd drank to be this mesmerized by what he had to offer.
You smiled once you caught him, leaning closer to leave a quick kiss on his lips.
"take off your clothes"
You got off of him, and once he saw you get rid of your shirt, your boobs pushed together by a simple black bra that somehow, at the moment, seemed like the sexiest thing in the world, he rushed to follow suit, nearly tripping getting off his pants.
The moment he looked at you again, the world- the universe, it all went quiet.
You stood naked before him, a soft, perfect little thing, looking like a damn dream.
"babygirl" he could only breathe as you reached him again.
"What?" you laughed
"I-I don't even know"
You shook your head, grinning from ear to ear as he pressed his mouth on yours again.
He was already addicted.
In a haze, you found yourself on the bed, your body caged beneath his, his tongue fighting with yours, his hands all over- You almost had the urge to laugh at how desperate he seemed, how frantically he was touching every inch of you, exploring every piece of skin-
His hands were on your tits, fingers gently playing with your nipples, then on your belly, your waist, your ass, your thighs, until finally, he found your core, but before he had the time to fully reach it you'd switched up with him, straddling his lap as he laid flat on his back... only he couldn't keep away for even a second and he immediately sat up, grabbing your waist.
He couldn't even begin to complain that you'd already grabbed his cock, positioning it at your entrance.
You couldn't wait anymore- you needed him now.
"Wait-" he murmured, his breathing labored already "you sure you're... y'know ready?"
Oh my god, you swore you were gonna fall for him if he kept this shit up.
"Joel" you smiled, looking into his big brown eyes "I've been wet since you fixed the cabinet"
"I-" he blushed "You-you sure?"
You didn't answer him, you simply took one of his hands in yours and guided him to feel just how much you were telling the truth.
"Fuck"
"yeah" you smirked "that's just what you do to me, Mr. Miller"
Jesus fuck
Joel didn't think his cock had ever been so hard.
You didn't give him time to do or say anything- he'd gathered that's how you did things by now- as you slowly, oh so very slowly, started sinking onto him.
He was big, the kind of big you'd be feeling tomorrow morning. The stretch hurt just right, so overwhelmed by the unadulterated pleasure that it was barely there.
Soft little moaned gasps spilled from your lips with every inch added, your eyes were closed, only focusing on the extraordinary feeling as your nails clawed at Joel's chest.
Until, finally- you'd done it. You were fully sat on his cock, and while your eyelids fluttered open, you regained your ability to hear- to hear the curses leaving Joel's mouth between ragged breaths
"Jesus Christ- Jesus fucking Christ- Goddamnit"
His grip on your waist was so tight you were sure it was gonna leave a bruise... not that you were complaining.
"you ok?"
His eyes were shut close and creases of effort filled his forehead, while his chest went up and down as he desperately tried to breathe.
"Joel?"
He swallowed tightly, now breathing in through his nose before exhaling from his mouth.
"d-don't move"
You smiled as you promised "I won't"
God this was fucking embarrassing.
He'd spent three days training.
And yes he wasn't sure he would have said yes, but still, better safe than sorry- except for the fact it clearly hadn't worked.
He had spent three days fucking his own fist and trying to last as much as possible and he did do progress... but this... this was fucking nothing like what he'd felt in the last twenty years.
He was so fucked
"I-I'm sorry" he gritted out, sounding almost defeated "I- I haven't done this in a long time darlin'"
"And you... you feel so fuckin' good- fuck"
Your walls had inadvertently squeezed around him at his words, making a groan rumble in his chest.
"You have nothing to apologize for Joel"
he would have told you that your voice was making everything worse if he weren't so preoccupied with trying to calm his dick down.
"take all the time you need"
And so he did, his eyes remained closed as he breathed through the initial shock, until finally, after what felt like an eternity, he was back.
He had to stifle a moan once he opened his eyes back up.
There you were, your beautiful eyes trained on his with such gentleness and care that it made where his gaze fell to feel even more sinful.
Your boobs were barely touching his chest, and yet they could have been in his face for the effect they had on him- his hands were on your waist, holding onto your soft flesh, your thighs were straddling his lap, giving him no choice but to finally look between your bodies, where you two connected.
"Darlin'" he murmured, hypnotized
You smiled, watching him admiring you in silence
"You look..."
Every word that came to mind wasn't enough, you were otherwordly, you were perfection... so he just settled on the simplest, and perhaps truest of them all.
"you're beautiful"
Your cheeks burned with heat as his gaze came back to yours.
"so are you, Joel"
And that was that.
His lips found yours again, and you couldn't stop your hips as they started moving, rocking back and forth and bringing little waves of ecstasy to your core.
A desperate moan spilled from yours to Joel's mouth as he grabbed the back of your head, forcing you into an even deeper kiss as he started following your movements.
Your hands went to the back of his neck, grabbing at the hair at the nape of it as you finally started bouncing on his dick, and god- god it was even better than you could have ever imagined
The loudest growl sounded from his throat as you worked yourself up and down on his shaft.
He was in another universe, his actions were only reflexes as the hand not tangled in your hair found your tits and then your ass, grabbing at it with tenderness and need.
"Oh Joel" you cried, his dick filling you up better than anything ever before.
You could quite literally feel him in your stomach, every little vein and ridge of skin creating a permanent dent inside of you that only he was ever gonna be able to fill.
"sweetheart- fuck" he groaned on his own, your breaths mixing as you ghosted each other's mouths, his eyes raking over your body and face, while yours couldn't help but roll to the back of your head as his manhood hit a particularly good spot.
"You feel so- good Joel" you whimpered mindlessly, now quickening your pace, desperation taking over you completely.
the sound of him entering your drenched core mixed with the bed creaking underneath you as you drove yourself closer and closer to heaven.
The sound of his name falling from your lips was something that filled Joel's chest with an indescribable feeling, he felt on top of the word, and at the same time... at the same time he wished it had never left your mouth because it was now forever imprinted in his brain, and he knew nothing was ever gonna compare to it.
Oh and also- also it was making his little lasting problem real fucking hard to control.
But he was nothing if not a gentleman,
You were gonna come, he wasn't gonna have it any other way.
His hand lowered down your belly as you kept chasing your release, looking like a damn glimpse of paradise, until his thumb found your clit.
"Oh fuck" you moaned, your eyes snapping open to look at him- a dark glaze of lust shading your iris.
Joel realized too late that he hadn't taken into account how fucking tight you'd get, and was now really paying the consequences.
Plus when you looked at him like that... maybe just this one time he could not be a gentleman- I mean it's not like he had much choice, he was trying his hardest but- shit
"darlin'" he mumbled, his thumb circling your bud "w-where do ya- where do ya want it?"
You moaned louder just at the thought of him coming
"Inside"
It wasn't even a question
"N-no sweetheart I-I shouldn-"
"Joel" you interrupted him, your lips grazing his as you talked, your grip on his hair tightening "I want you to fill me up until I can feel you leaking out of me for days"
Good Christ and heaven
"Fuck me" he cursed, all his strength going on not coming right there and then "Darlin' please- tell me you're close"
You were already seeing stars as he spoke
"I'm close, baby- oh fuck" you cried "Joel!"
A tsunami of lust-filled pleasure coursed through your veins as your orgasm hit like a damn truck.
You couldn't even remember your name as you screamed his own into the thick air, as you moaned and cried and spasmed around him, feeling him do exactly what you'd asked- filling you up to the very brim.
He'd started coming the moment you did- he couldn't do anything about it, it was just unadulterated perfection-
His head fell between your neck and shoulders as groaned like a man possessed,
until finally, after a good three minutes, you were both back to the land of the living.
He looked twenty years younger when he looked at you again, and you- you looked like the most beautiful woman on earth.
A soft smile pulled at your lips, and you couldn't help but ask "How long before we can do it again?"
And fuck him, but his age didn't matter, with those eyes of yours, it might very well be minutes.
@kluvspedro @bluebiyou @casssiopeia @bean-is-reading @millerispunk @i-cant-stfu
#joel miller#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller fluff#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel miller fanfic#sub!Joel#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x fem!reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x y/n#joel miller x you#sub joel miller#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#joel miller imagine#joel miller blurb#smut#joel miller angst#fanfiction#the last of us#tlou#the last of us hbo#tlou hbo
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.
#tag talk#the problem with going out and meeting new people to make friends is that so many people are highkey unbearable to be around#they'll fuck up basic scheduling for dates and meetups. they'll flake and message you about it two days later.#literally scheduled a dinner date with some dude and he never showed. texts me an hour later like âsorry I fell asleepâ bitch you what?#like. messaging me literally last minute going âhey I've decided to not show upâ is better than ghosting.#this isn't the first time something like this has happened. but like. why do people not respect my time.#I try so hard to communicate clearly and be transparent about timeline and schedule and letting people know if something comes up#and I'm not saying I'm better than other people. I'm saying I don't know why other people don't do it too. it feels like the bare minimum.#anyway. my brother was giving me shit for not sticking with friends for more than a few months and like. bro I have good reason.#I'm not going to choose to put in the effort for a relationship with someone if it's constant work on my end and constant let-downs on thei#like. bro I know I'm just some cheap ass to you but I'm still a person so maybe realize that I've put you in my schedule respect that#anyway. not being lonely isn't as easy as meeting new people. you have to actually like the people you meet.#meeting people you hate just entrenches you in the desire to never talk to people ever again.#unrelated. I cooked the best chicken of my life yesterday. milk butter garlic onion and lemon pepper.#crushed and minced garlic. diced onion. milk. butter. lemon pepper. heated in a pan.#then chicken pieces added to sauce in pan for a little bit. then moved to a pan in the oven.#I usually don't like chicken but damn this is genuinely so good. also my parents always cut chicken cross-grain and imo it's harder to eat#I prefer cutting the meat with the grain. idk why but it's so much easier to chew.#oh! pro tip. if you have trouble with milk going bad in the fridge cause you don't use it enough. powdered milk. big adhd tip#I can leave the tin of powdered milk in the pantry for months and then pull it out whenever I need it. no worry about spoiled milk#back to social and people. like. even nice people. I just don't like them anyway. idk why. like. nice polite people. mm too boring#would I like to be able to hold onto friends? sure. is that a reasonable expectation given my track record? no#I wasn't joking when I said I could drop tumblr no problem. it's nice here but relationships are fragile nothing built on air and dust#idk. cursed to a life of eternal loneliness. super fun. don't take this as a call for help. I don't need you to say âI'm sorry you're sadâ
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match my freak | yuki tsunoda social media au
pairing: yuki tsunoda x fem rugby player reader
there's only one person who can match the yuki tsunoda radio freak...
MAIN MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
.ăťăăăť part of the aston martini summer olympics ăťăăăťďź
yukitsunoda0511
liked by pierregasly, danielricciardo and 384,098 others
tagged: yourusername
yukitsunoda0511: spa was fine i guess, time to spend my summer break in france (ew) supporting the love of my life (yay)
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user1: 'fine i guess' as if we didn't get YOINTS
user2: tbf if my gf looked like that, points also wouldn't matter to me
pierregasly: FRANCE (EW)??? DID OUR HOMOEROTIC TENSION MEAN NOTHING???
yukitsunoda0511: oh so when i diss france we had homoerotic tension but when i said we were boyfriends i went too far đ¤¨
pierregasly: diss me all you want but not the homeland?
yukitsunoda0511: fine, i will from 5pm tomorrow
pierregasly: ???
yukitsunoda0511: because y/n will be there and therefore it will be the ONLY country in existence
pierregasly: i give up
user3: i need a man this down bad for me asap
user4: maybe it's time to lower my height requirements :(
yourusername: it's not how tall you are but how you are tall
user5: idk what the fuck that means
yourusername: IT MEANS SHORT KINGS PUT IN A LOT OF EFFORT WHY DO I HAVE TO SPELL OUT EVERYTHING? WHERE IS THE MEDIA LITERACY? THE READ COMPREHENSION?
user6: okay i think i now know ^^ why y/n and yuki are so good together
user7: i need someone to edit together their most iconic on field and radio moments together please for my mental health
yourusername: that's a crazy coincidence because the love of MY life will also be in paris đ¤¨
yukitsunoda0511: well i bet i love my love of my life more than you love your love of your life
yourusername: NUH UH
yukitsunoda0511: yep :PPPPPPP
yourusername: u wanna fight?
yukitsunoda0511: yes actually!
yourusername: well soz babe i can't get all hot and bothered before competing đ¤ˇââď¸
yukitsunoda0511: BORING
yourusername
liked by danielricciardo, pierregasly and 318,905 others
tagged: yukitsunoda
yourusername: seeing yuki again: 10/10 ... realising he's not allowed in the olympic village and there's only cardboard beds anyway -100,000/10
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user12: so i suddenly understand why they give out so many condoms at the olympics
user13: why do they all go so feral?
yourusername: have you seen my man?
yourusername: AND THAT'S A RHETORICAL QUESTION TO SHOW OFF MY HANDSOME LITTLE MAN NOT AN INVITATION FOR YOU BITCHES TO THIRST
user14: noted đ
pierregasly: i'm the one with a bad digital footprint but you're out here being just as horny as me on main
yourusername: i am allowed to ?
pierregasly: and i'm not allowed to?
yourusername: no
pierregasly: so fuck me i guess?
yourusername: let me be a woman in a male dominated field (being gross online)
yukitsunoda0511: yeah pierre stop trying to minimise womens' voices
pierregasly: how am i the bad guy again?
yourusername: man â¤ď¸
pierregasly: yuki is a man?
yourusername: he's MY man which means he's been closely vetted and is basically one of the girls now
user14: i know visa cashapp rb or whatever the fuck they're called hate to see them coming
user15: it's the fact she's taller than most of the mechanics and she is always watching over them
yukitsunoda0511: i missed you so much but i can't wait to watch you beat the shit out of the competition
yourusername: for you, anything
yukitsunoda0511: a gold? so at least one of us can be world champion đĽş
yourusername: i'll win gold for you and then schedule in a friendly visit to see helmut
yukitsunoda0511: i think your mere presence could give him a heart attack
yourusername: oh well
user16: so real of her
olympics
liked by yukitsunoda0511, landonorris and 1,209,678 others
tagged: newzealandrubgy
olympics: the women's rugby final saw gold go home to new zealand!
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user17: okay yuki i am SEEING THE VISION
user18: i watched this game to see her and i am a changed woman
user19: i am no better than a man
danielricciardo: my personal favourite moment was when y/n clotheslined that poor girl, laughed in her face and said if she tried to get past her again she'd make trinket dishes out of her knee caps
yourusername: why thank you, i think my wit is my least appreciated part of my game
danielricciardo: i think we should honestly get you in the commentary box
yourusername: i'd make mince meat of crofty, he'd never say anything about yuki's radios again
danielricciardo: can you tell them to stop telling me to retire while you're at it?
yourusername: sure, i'm feeling generous
danielricciardo: a gold medal will do that to you
user20: so they weren't joking when they said that her and yuki are just the same person in different fonts ?
user21: my commentary team apologised about 20 times for her swearing on the broadcast but then they kept bursting out laughing whenever she said anything
yukitsunoda0511: HOLY FUCKING SHIT
yukitsunoda0511: GOAT GOAT GOAT MY GIRLFRIEND IS THE GOAT
yukitsunoda0511: i'm so proud, i love you y/n đŤśđťđĽšâ¤ď¸âđŠš
yourusername: i love you too boo
yukitsunoda0511: can they let me in the room now? i'm getting withdrawal symptoms :(
yourusername: of course, i can't celebrate properly without you
yukitsunoda0511: đđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ
user22: picturing yuki waiting outside the team room is so cute
user23: the nz team instagram posted a pic of it on their story he had flowers and balloons (âŠËoËâŠ)âĄ
yukitsunoda0511
liked by pierregasly, maxverstappen1 and 893,401 others
tagged: yourusername
yukitsunoda0511: she matches my freak :)
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user25: oh believe me we know
user26: i'm like a confusing mix of scared AND turned on
yukitsunoda0511: you keep that to yourself
user27: okay sir đ¤¨
yukitsunoda0511: you can look but you can't touch :P
yukitsunoda0511: actually don't even look
yukitsunoda0511: don't even think about her ( ・ â˘Ě á´ â˘Ě ・)
user28: this man is insane, i love him
yourusername: you LIKE HIM YOU APPRECIATE HIM FROM AFAR YOU MAYBE HAVE A PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIP YOU DON'T LOVE HIM THAT'S FOR ME AND ME ONLY
user29: oh they weren't joking about matching each other's freaks
yourusername: there's no one else i'd like to be a lil gremlin with :3
yukitsunoda0511: gremlins forever with you <3
yourusername: sounds like paradise to me !!
yukitsunoda0511: i'm on it âđť
user30: is he going to propose ???
user31: hopefully (ă
â˘áˇ ââ˘áˇ
)
pierregasly: yeah i guess you guys are kinda cute
yukitsunoda0511: kINDA?
yourusername: i know this man ain't speaking on us
yourusername: kika is the face economy in that relationship
yourusername: her back must hurt from carrying the style in this couple
francisca.cgomez: well đĽš
pierregasly: WHAT ? HOW ?
yukitsunoda0511: don't call my girlfriend kinda cute then đ¤¨
user32: good lord
fin.
note: she's back !!!!!
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#yuki tsunoda instagram au#yuki tsunoda x you#yuki tsunoda x reader#yuki tsunoda imagine#yuki tsunoda
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Me when Iâve been taking my meds consistently for a week and then I suddenly feel like I have no motivation for art or poetry đŞđŞđŞđŞđŞđŞ
#Iâm almost more depressed when I take my meds bc I am happy but all of my passion is gone#like all I do is sit around and smoke weed and watch watch tv instead of curating mood boards or writing poetry or trying three different#art mediums in one day#like itâs so fucking depressing that I either have to be so fucked up mentally that I canât hold a job or I have to be so happy that the#only thing I have any real calling for is doing something repetitive and boring for money#like girl this canât be my way of life forever it just canât be#feel like Iâm going to cry thinking about being mentally ill forever#either I take meds and feel like a numb zombie or I donât take meds and Iâm creative and passionate but I also might hurt myself or worse#like bruh. why canât I be happy and also creative#idk if Iâm taking too much or too little meds. might up myself back to my regular dose soon of a pill morning and night but I just hate#taking meds and that opens the door for it to be even harder for me to remember to take them morning and night and it gives me heartburn ugh#wah wah wah Iâm a big whiney baby because I donât want to kill myself and therefore I have to go be an adult and try to get a job thatâs#really my fuckin issue. Iâm just whining and bitching cause I donât wanna put the effort into being happy#Iâll get over myself and journal or read or just step away from the internet for a little bit and suddenly Iâll be back to loving life
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fem reader. both reader and yuji get zero bitches. waxing.
I was having thoughts about Yuji getting his first wax at this really cute spaâ its the new year so heâs really trying to make the effort of taking this whole âself careâ thing heâs been seeing on TikTok seriously. He seems like the type to be pretty hairy down south anyway and in turn he trims it here and there but he never really upkeeps the maintenance. He wants to see what this waxing thing is all about.
So, he books the appointment and he gets you as his esthetician. Heâs nervous! But also very excited! He booked a facial as well as the wax so you of course take very good care of him. The conversation is flowing beautifully and thereâs a bit of chemistry there. He also thinks youâre drop dead gorgeous and when he walked into the studio, he tripped over his shoelace but thatâs neither here or there.
When itâs finally time for the wax? Youâre prepping everything all nice and instruct him to take off his pants and boxersâ and Yuji immediately freezes. Heâs all like âWhat do you mean?â so you look at him from over your shoulder because you think heâs being silly but the look of genuine confusion on his face lets you know heâs being deadass serious. You tell him, âWell, I canât wax you with your pants on now can I, cutie?â as sweet as can be, its almost a little maternal too the way you say it.
Poor Yuji. He didnât really think about any of this fully through. He mentally punches himself in the face because of course he would have to expose himself to the esthetician, thatâs just how a Brazilian wax works! Yuji doesnât want to make it awkward so he complies and takes off his pants and underwear before he lays back onto the table. God, heâs never felt so embarrassed in his life! Is the lamp really necessary..? The warmth of it did feel pretty nice. Thatâs beside the point anyway.
As heâs laying there while you dilly about with your back turned to him, his mind starts to wander. When was the last time heâs had a womanâs touch? It feels like ages because it kind of has. A year? Almost close to a year. He canât really remember. Yuji thinks youâre pretty and a good timeâ youâre easy to talk to and if he didnât know any better, he thinks he might have a tiny, little crush on you. Heâs already been thinking about booking another service just so he can see you.
The thought is super cute, but what isnât cute is Yuji fighting every single demon, every single thoughtâ nearly trying to astral project so he wonât get hard. You didnât give him a warning before wrapping your gloved hand around his shaft and he jumped, which did get a giggle and a little âFeeling jumpy today, are we?â out of you. He played it off with a bashful little âSorry.â before relaxing again. Youâre not really doing much but your job and thatâs why he feels like such a pervert when all the blood from his skull has rushed to his cock.
For him, itâs like this huge elephant in the room but for you? You donât mind, thereâs always a possibility which is why you donât take male clients but Yuji is the only exception because heâs cute and seems like a good boy. He probably thinks that he has a poker face but thereâs a reason why you keep cooing at him because heâs definitely the type to wear his heart on his sleeve. Itâs so desperately obvious that heâs trying to think about the most unpleasant and uncomfortable things but itâs not working.
As the service continues, Yuji is not longer trying to keep from stay hard but heâs now rather trying not to cum all over your hands and his chest. But itâs becoming increasingly difficult to do so. He peeks down every now and again to see the progress, he keeps telling himself âSheâs almost done, sheâs almost done.â that he needs to hold out for just a few minutes more then he can put his pants back on. But, unfortunately it doesnât seem to work out like he would have hoped to plan.
Your hand slid up his cock with just enough pressure and friction to make him blow his, really fat load actually. He desperately tried to grab your wrist before it happened but it was already too late, the broken protest turned into a pitiful moan halfway, the panicked jerk of his body.. truth be told you thought it was sweet. Youâve also been going through a dry spell yourself. Your last ex made you want to do some healing but with that came with stepping out of the dating pool and no casual sex.
You, yourself felt like a bit of a pervert standing here with a man putty in your fingertips. âIâm so sorry, Iâm so sorryâ was all that left his lips as you cleaned him with with a Kleenex but all you could say in return was:
âCan I..? Have your number?â
#â âś ď˝ĄË Â° bria writes!#yuji itadori#jujustu kaisen#yuji itadori x reader#yuji itadori smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk yuji x reader#jjk itadori#fem!reader#female reader
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love to hate you | jjk [vii]
âwhen obnoxiously rich and spoiled frat boy jeon jungkook comes up to you one day and asks you to fake date him for money, you definitely should have said no. because before you knew it, you were going on insta dates with him and having lunch with his equally obnoxiously rich and spoiled friends.â
â genre:Â sexual themes, angst, fluff, fratboy! AU, fake dating! AU, college! AU, rich kid! AU, enemies to lovers! AU
â pairing: jungkook x female reader
â word count: 17.966
â warnings: swearing/cursing, alcohol consumption, jealousy, no communication skills whatsoever
â playlist: to be added
â a/n: after almost two years of no update its done. it would be a lie to say that i was always one hundred percent sure this was gonna see the light of day but its finally here, and im so so so happy to just put it out there and give it to you guys. @koocycle has listened to me bitch abt this one so much so thanks to her, also for kinda inspiring me to get back into tumblr.com and writing !! enjoy!! and once again, this is inspired by To All The Boys Iâve Loved Before by Jenny Han!
âYouâre really showing your wealth, you know?â you said as Jungkook slid into the driverâs seat, shutting out the cold air. He raised a brow, handing you the bag for you to hold onto, shivering slightly from the cold, his neck exposed to the harsh wind.
âHow so?â
The engine sputtered to life as he slotted in the keys, his phone mounted to the dashboard, showing him the way. You pulled out the one-hundred-dollar expensive wine bottle from the bag, scrutinising it. Some of the glitter from the red ribbon the salesman had wrapped around it in an effort to be more festive and fitting todayâs occasion peeled off.Â
âThis is too much.â
âYeah, I know, the bowâs tacky but I couldnât stop Kangjoon from-â
âNo, I mean the hundred bucks you dropped on it. It shows your wealth,â you repeated, scrunching your nose. âAlso, didnât know you were on a first name basis with the salesman.â
You let the bottle slip back into its bag, scared Jungkook was going to make a sharp stop and cause you to drop and waste the bottle. God knows you didnât have one hundred bucks casually lying around like himâeven though you were sure Jungkook wouldnât make you replace it and would definitely just buy it again himself.
âWhat? Donât tell me you didnât like Kangjoon? Heâs a great man, very competent.â And just as you were about to tell him that Kangjoon scammed him, Jungkook continued, âAlso isnât that the whole reason why youâre dating me? My wealth?âÂ
He said it with a grin, turning to you as he let a family of four pass, receiving a thankful hand raise from both of the parents as they ushered their young children across the street. And even though he meant it purely as a joke, his smile and tone indicating as much, his words made you scrunch your face like youâd been stung by a bee.Â
âItâs so unnecessary. We wouldnât know the difference between this and supermarket wine, and Chae literally said not to bring anything. Sheâs gonna scold you, you know?â
If it had gone your way, youâd have gotten the second cheapest bottle of semi-fancy alcohol they had and called it a day but Jungkook swiped his card before you could intervene, ever so easily charmed. Well, actually if it had gone your way at all, you wouldnât have brought anything to begin with. Chaeyoung hated it if her guests brought anything anyway.
âGotta impress your friends, donât I? Canât have them not like me,â he argued, and you rolled your eyes.
âFirst of all, no, you donât-â
âYou donât want your friends to like your boyfriend?â Jungkook gasped, staring at you with his mouth agape and eyes wide as you came to a stop in front of a red light. You shook your head.
âNo, can I speak?â you sighed, frowning as Jungkook laughed, clearly getting his kick out of annoying you. âMy friends already like you, and you know that. Weâre driving to Jiâs and Chaeâs place now for a Christmas party. One that you were explicitly invited to. So I donât believe you for a second when you say that you got this wine to impress them. Also, Chae said not to bring anything. You just like spending money.â
Jungkook pursed his lips, trying and failing to hide a grin. âDo I now?â
âAm I not exhibit A?â
He gave you a look as if to say touchĂŠ.
âOkay, maybe youâre right,â he admitted. âBut just so you know, I gladly spent my money on that wine if it means Iâll impress your friends and make them like me more. And Iâm even more than happy to spend it on you, cabbage.â
He looked at you by the end of his words, flashing you a grin. A grin that made him look so pretty and adorable, that would have made your knees buckle if you hadnât been sitting, that wrapped your heart into his grip even tighter. A grin that made you wonder if a parachute would be enough to stop your fall for him, or if you were simply doomed for this fate, for the bone crushing landing.
You turned your head to the window, glad to see you had made it to Jisooâs and Chaeyoungâs place.
âI think youâre just happy to have an excuse to spend your money,â you mumble, pretending to busy yourself with the straps of the bag.
âSureââ There was a shrug, and you should have prepared yourself for the worst, should know better by now that Jungkook couldnât just agree with you and leave you in peace. ââor youâre just the love of my life, cabbage, and whatâs mine is yours.â
The words remained casual on Jungkookâs tongue, easy as ever. And they remained difficult and frown-inducing for you.Â
âYouâre-!â
A laugh bubbled up from Jungkookâs upon your silence, and though you were trying your deepest and most desperate to resist, your heart skipped a beat. It was fatal, cardiologists would say. How deeply youâd fallen, it was fatal. Your heart couldnât be saved.
And as if he hadnât said the most impossible thing ever, Jungkook pulled into the parking lot and turned off the engine, a grin plastered on his lips.
âAlright, letâs-â
You yanked the door open, stepping (of course) in a puddle. With a groan and wince, you slammed the door shut. Your breath came out white and cloudy, December coming into its full swing. The weather had been harsher than everâwind dragging on your skin until it was painful and tense, air cold enough to dry out your throat and mouth, every window coloured a milky white, and clouds hanging far and wide in the sky for every hour of the day. The urge to crawl back into the oh so warm car was strong. The urge to run away from Jungkook however was just that much stronger.Â
The bottle bumped your hip bone as you rushed towards Jisooâs and Chaeyoungâs apartment building. You didnât turn around as Jungkook called after you to wait with a laugh, fumbling to unhook his phone from the dashboard.Â
You reached the glass front door rather quickly, a handprint smudged across it that hadnât been there last time. You cringed, but couldnât think about it too much, worrying a lot more about the diminishing distance between Jungkook and you as you waited for one of your friends to open the stupid door for you. You knew for a fact they were already there, spotting Hoseokâs car parked on the side of the street. If he was there, Jimin was too, always catching a ride with him.
âDo you really think you can outrun me?â Jungkook called out, just a dozen steps behind you.Â
You pulled on the front door as if it made a difference, pressing the bell repeatedly. He slowed his walk, burying his hands into his pockets. All so very smug. Your features twisted into a frown.Â
âYouâre so slow. You always run from me as if I wonât catch up with you in two-â
For once fate seemed to be on your side, the buzzer cutting through the air. The door almost hit you in the face when you yanked it open. You slammed it back shut again, just right in front of Jungkookâs nose. He pulled on the handle. The lock had clicked in. You watched his features twist as he realised he was too slow. His lips pressed together, curling inwards as he watched the biggest and proudest grin spread on yours.
âWhat were you saying? About me being too slow?â you said. A smile tucked on the corners of his mouth as he shook his head at you.
âOpen up.â
He knocked on the glass, right in front of your nose.
âWhat? I canât hear you.â
You put your hand to your ear, tilting your head.
âJust open up.â
âYou gotta speak louder. I really canât hear you with this door between-â
âCabbage, you better open the door for me now, or Iâm gonna make you regret it,â Jungkook said, narrowing his eyes, tongue poking in his cheek. And even though you were certain it was an empty threatâhow was he going to make you regret it?â, you contemplated for just a second if maybe you should listen and open the door.Â
âIâm gonna count to three.â
You scoffed. Were you a kid? And even more so, what was Jungkook going to do to you? Were you going to cave because of an empty threat?Â
âPlease do,â you smiled, eliciting one from Jungkook himself.
âThree.â
He raised a brow.
âTwo.â
You folded your arms in front of your chest.
âOne.â
A moment passed.Â
Nothing happened.
âAlright, fine,â Jungkook said before dramatically ringing the bell. And even though you rolled your eyes, you did inch back. He was going to chase you, that one was for sure.Â
The moment the buzzer rang, you took off. Jungkook let out a laugh.
âNow, you run?â he taunted, pulling the door open, his steps echoing through the hallway. You took two stairs at a time, yelping when you realised that Jungkook was hot on your tail. Maybe you should have run earlier. Or maybe you should have opened the door for him. But who were you, letting a guy threaten you? No less Jungkook of all people, that idiot.
You made it up the flight of stairs faster than you ever had, your lungs lit on fire. The front door already stood ajar for you. You could distantly hear Chaeyoung call out for Jisoo- A hand wrapped around your waist and pulled you back. Jungkook stood right in front of you, chest bumping into you, the biggest grin on his lips.
Shit.
âGotcha.â
Your face soured.
âOh, h-how are you?â you coughed with a smile, and he chuckled, never taking his eyes off of you even as he grabbed the bag from your hands and placed it down. You had completely forgotten about it. âDonât look at me like this. T-thatâs not fun.â
âNeither was having the door slammed in my face.âÂ
You backed into the wall. Turns out being tough was a lot more difficult when there wasnât a door to shield you and Jungkook was actually in front of you, just centimetres from your face and staring at you like you were his favourite thing in this entire world. His hand sneaked around your waist, slipping underneath your sweater, fingers grazing the small of your back. His touch was light and delicate, teasing in all the right ways. It was cold too, making you arch and almost wince. And it was all too muchâa tingle spreading across your back, rushing straight to your heart.
âAny last words before I make you regret it?â Jungkook hummed, and you should snort and laugh because he should sound ridiculous. But somehow, his words made you tense, the mere thought making your head spin in rounds and rounds. You bit on your tongue, silencing any sound that might just want to crawl up your throat.
You shouldnât let Jungkook be this close to you. You needed distance for your sanity. But you couldnât bring it over your heart to push him away. You didnât have it in you. Not when there was very much a part of you that wanted to find out what Jungkook exactly meant.
He drank you up with his eyes, gaze dark and full of something hazy. Full of something you couldnât pinpoint. But you loved it, you did. Maybe a little too much even. You loved the way it made your heart thump and rumble in your chest, made you forget that this was too much and far and dangerous, that Jungkook and you should keep your distance because in just a few weeks all of this would be over and youâd go your merry ways. But right now, with your back against the wall and Jungkook caging you in, thrill and excitement rushing through every single one of your cells, you couldnât stop. You didnât think you ever could.
âGot nothing to say now, cabbage?â
And when you still wouldnât respond, he smiled. His face inched closer to yours, his nose brushing yours. Your fingers itched to hold onto something, onto him, curling and uncurling in the air. Because you shouldnât, you really shouldnât. But you did, hands gripping his sweater as if you were lost in the sea and he was all you had to cling to.Â
You closed your eyes, anticipating and waiting for Jungkook to kiss you, your breath stuck in your chest. Any time now. It was going to happen-
âOh my God, please donât do this in my hallway.â
You whipped your head around, your heart dropping to the floor. Jisoo stood in the doorway, face twisted in utter disgust.
âPlease, anywhere but my fucking hallway. That's all Iâm gonna be able to think about. Seeing the two of you eating each otherâs faces.â
There was even clearer disgust in her voice.
Oh God.
âHello, Ji,â Jungkook smiled, and you expected him to back away from you, but he gave you no distance. He wasnât even the slightest embarrassed, if anything you sensed the slightest annoyance swinging with his words.
âPlease step away from her, Kook,â Jisoo asked, gesturing for him to move backwards. But he wasnât all too eager to follow, staying cemented right in front of you, hands still around your waist. He paused to think.
âIâve got a really expensive bottle of wine.â He pointed to the bag. âIâll give it to you in exchange for five more minutes.â
âOh, you brought something? Chaeâs gonna kill you,â Jisoo laughed before changing her tune, tilting her head to the side. âBut how expensive are we talking?â
âLike one hundred bucks.â
You stared holes into Jungkook, mouth agape. You couldnât believe what you were hearing. Were you not right here too? Did you become air? It was like you were cattle being sold off.Â
âOh,â Jisoo gasped before shrugging. âOkay, deal-â
âYeah, no way,â you laughed before doing what you should have done earlierâyou pushed Jungkook away, making him tumble backwards a little. You stepped around him.Â
âBut, Y/N, itâs one hundred-â
âJi!â you gasped, making her laugh and reach out for you. She wrapped her arms around your neck, giggling as she did.Â
âIâm kidding. Iâm kidding. I would never,â she told you, and you raised a brow at her. âRight, Kook?â
âYeah, we were just kidding.â
âI donât- hey! I can see you two exchanging looks!â you gasped, neither of the two even trying to be subtle. âDo you think Iâm blind?â
âHa, funny, I think-â Jisoo cleared her throat. ââI think Chae is calling for me? Oh my God, do you hear that? Yes, Iâm on my way, Chae!â
And as if she hadnât just stabbed you in the back, she slipped inside. But not without grabbing the bag and thanking Jungkook for it. You rolled your eyes, turning to head inside when he cleared his throat.
Jungkook was staring at you with his brows raised, clearly expecting⌠something.Â
âWhat?â you barked. He gave you a smile before stretching out his hand. You groaned. âSeriously? We have to get inside-â
But he waved his hand around, not budging. Rolling your eyes and with a long exhale, you took his hand into yours.Â
âYouâre a child-â
Jungkook pulled you towards him, shutting you up with a kiss. One hand cupped your cheek and the other rested on the small of your back, pushing you into him. The kiss was tender and soft, gentle and light. And still, it was enough to have your heart thumping louder and harder in your chest than ever before. You asked yourself if Jungkook could feel it at all. That heart of yours that was oh so tight in his grip. That heart of yours that was bleeding in your chest. That heart of yours already ached at the thought of this all ending in just a few weeks.Â
It was a lovely kiss, a devastatingly lovely kiss.
And when Jungkook pulled away, his eyes so full and beautiful, you felt gutted and empty. Because this meant nothing to him. This meant nothing at all. You looked away. Jungkook laughed, pulling you flush to his side, all too unaware.
âLetâs go?â
You nodded slightly.Â
Jimin was first to greet you, leaping up from the couch and pulling you into a hug. âYou made it!â
âTook you long enough,â Taehyung mumbled, sipping on his beer, earning himself a look from Namjoon that he simply ignored. âWe could hear you two yelling around in the hallway.â
âMerry Christmas to you too, Tae,â Jungkook laughed, and the older one frowned at him.Â
âItâs December 10th.â
âIn other words, itâs almost-â
âNo, itâs not-â
Hoseok greeted you with a hug, ignoring Taehyungâs and Jungkookâs bickering because otherwise he would never get to say hello to you. âLooking good.â
âThanks.â You stared at his sweater. âThatâs one really ugly Christmas sweater.â
He laughed, thanking you. Seokjin and Namjoon were next to give you a quick hug, followed by Jennie and Yoongi, exchanging a few words with each of them. Taehyung and you stared at each other for a few seconds, neither of you saying anything. And though he tried to hide it, a smile formed on his lips. A smile you could only return. You blamed it on the holidays. They made you especially sappy and sentimental.
You were first to reach out. Taehyung reciprocated the hug. It was a little awkward and short and one-armed. It was more than anyone could ask of you. Jungkook nodded in both amazement and approval when you caught his eyes for a split second, and you just scrunched your nose at him.
âSo how-â
You tuned out Seokjin, taking a minute to admire the decoration around you instead. Chaeyoung (because Jisoo wasnât particularly all too fond of Christmas, but did put up with all of it because Chaeyoung very much was) always outdid herself every holiday season: red little fuzzy stockings hanging off shelves and cupboard knobs, cinnamon-scented candles lit up all throughout the place, miniature Santa and reindeer figurines sitting on every surface alongside bowls of chocolates and peppermints with fake snow underneath. There was even a small fake Christmas tree crammed into the corner of their living room with colourful baubles (some of which Jimin had gifted and had pictures of you all printed on them) and equally colourful fairy lights hanging on it. And of course, Michael BublĂŠ was on heavy rotation, his voice carried throughout the home.Â
âWhereâs Chae?â you asked Jisoo when she came up next to you, both of you standing in front of the Christmas tree.Â
âOh, you know-â
âAh, great, you guys finally made it as well,â Chaeyoung exhaled, coming out from the kitchen, and seeing Jungkook and you among the other guests. There was a slight edge accompanying her words, and you doubted for no second that her nerves were running high from having to host tonight and needing all of this to turn out perfect. (Even if she chose this fate upon herself.) Her updo was falling apart, strands sticking out in the wrong places. Still, she looked pretty. Especially with her reindeer apron tied around her waist. She had had it since middle school, and seeing it brought back all kinds of memories. You couldnât help but grin, Jisoo and you exchanging looks. And when your gaze met Chaeoyungâs, she knew. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head.Â
âYeah, I know,â she mumbled, speaking to you too only and confusing the others in the process. Jisoo and you snickered.Â
âAnywayââ Chaeyoyung waved her hand around, ââIâve got some unfortunate news. Dinner isnât ready. Iâll need at least another thirty minutes. Hope you guys didnât come too hungry.â
âDo you need help with anything?â Jungkook asked, already getting up from the couch. Yoongi raised his hand, silently extending the offer as well. Jennie nodded, clearly willing to get her hands dirty too.
âYeah, anything we can do to help you?â Taehyung asked, making an effort to get up too, but Chaeyoung was quick to shake her head.
âNo, I donât need help,â she mumbled, clearing her throat. âI just wanted to inform you guys. You all would help if you guys just busied yourself and didnât come into the kitchen.â
And before anyone could insist on their help, Chaeyoung disappeared back inside the kitchen.
âShouldnât we-?â
âIf you wanna stay on her good side, donât take a single step into the kitchen. Donât even breathe in that direction, or think about helping her,â Jisoo explained, and Jungkook looked at you as if to ask if this was exaggerated at all.
âYeah, Chaeâs⌠very peculiar with that kind of stuff.â
âBut there are so many of us. Is she really gonna do all of it on her own?â Jennie asked, but Hoseok waved her off.Â
âTrust me, she is and she will. Chae gets super stressed, but she also loves to host. If you donât let her, sheâll be in a bad mood for ages. Itâs better to just let her do her own thing.â
âAnd if it actually gets too much, sheâll come out and ask for help at one point. Trust me,â Jimin added.
âYou think? Iâm not so sure about that one,â Jisoo snorted and moved over to grab a handful of chocolates. Almost instinctively, she placed a hand on Jennieâs shoulder, and for a moment, you wondered if Jungkook and you ever looked this natural and comfortable with each other. If you looked as much as a couple as Jisoo and Jennie did. âWhen has she ever asked for help?â
âThereâs no way she can do all of this on her own,â Taehyung said, frowning.
âYou donât know Chae.â
âMaybe. But it seems humanly impossible to pull off this entire thing without asking for at least some help.â
Jisoo raised her brow at Taehyung, pausing a moment. âOh, do you wanna bet?â Her mouth pulled into a grin at the mere prospect of making some easy money. âTen bucks?â
Hoseok and you exchanged glances over their heads. This was very much typical of Jisoo.Â
âDonât bet with her, Tae. Sheâs a scammer,â Jimin said, pushing Jisooâs hand away as she waited for him to shake it.
âI wonât,â Taehyung laughed, taking a sip from his beer. âYou know I donât do-â
The ear-shattering sound of a pan clashing with the kitchen tiles emerged from the kitchen, followed up with a few loud curses and an âItâs fine!â. You cringed when something else you couldnât identify fell to the floor a second later, eliciting even more curses. Almost instinctively, you turned to Jisoo, nudging her. Because as much as she was right that it was a bad idea to go help Chaeyoung, it would actually be worse not to go in right now when everything seemed to go off the rails.
âYeah, yeah, I know. My cue to jump in,â she grumbled, begrudgingly making her way to the kitchen, knowing already she would have to endure Chaeyoungâs snappy attitude. She squeezed Jennieâs hand in goodbye.Â
âSee, sheâs getting help,â Taehyung said to no one in particular and righteously took a sip from his beer. Jungkook applauded him sarcastically, and you were about to say something when-
âOh, this is cute!â Seokjin gasped, coming up to you. You followed his gaze to the bauble he was admiring. It had an old picture of you and your friends on it, faces curving around the porcelain. âHow old are you guys there?â
You pursed your lips. âThatâs probably senior year? So like seventeen maybe? Eighteen?â
âWhat are you guys doing- oh my God, you guys look so young.â Namjoon hooked an arm around Seokijnâs shoulder, marvelling at your younger selves. âLook at that one!â
He pointed out one with just Jisoo, Chaeyoung and you on it. It was one of the first pictures you three had taken together. All three of you still stuck in middle school. You couldnât decide whether to be embarrassed or nostalgic.
âIs that Ji? Her hair, oh my God!â Seokjin laughed, pointing out the blunt bob Jisoo used to rock.
âDonât be mean!â And yet, Namjoon laughed too.
âYouâre lucky Ji canât hear you right now because sheâd kill you,â you said. âBut actually, you should see some of Seokâs old pictures. He looks so different-â
A hand snaked around your waist. You tensed. But you relaxed a second later when you realised who it was. You peeked over your shoulder just to check and smiled when you turned out to be right. He placed his chin on your shoulder.
âHello,â Jungkook whispered, and you squirmed, his breath tickling your ear. He was so close to you, too close. You could practically feel his heart beating behind yours.
âHey,â you returned, a bit breathless and pitchy. You cleared your throat.
âWhat are you guys doing?â
âOh, uh, nothing really,â you mumbled, waving your hand around.
Jungkook frowned, but didnât ask any further. âOkay, well, I wanted to get you something to drink. You think I can go into the kitchen without getting murdered?â
âYeah, youâre fine. Jiâs there too,â you said, glancing over your shoulder to meet his gaze. He was already looking at you, eyes big and so full and a smile on his lips.
âOkay, then do you want anything in particular?â
You shook your head. âUh, no, whatever is fine.â
âWhatever it is.â
But rather than just leave to get you said drink, Jungkook lingered, not moving away from you just yet. You raised a brow at him, making him smile. As if he could read your mind, he loosened his grip around your waist, but not before pressing a kiss to your neck.
âGetting you that drink,â he smiled, backing away.Â
You touched a hand to where he had kissed you, gripping, feeling hot all of a sudden. It was stupid, you were stupid.Â
âJesus.â
And albeit, it was quiet and muttered under his breath, you heard it very clearly. You looked at Seokjin, eyes big as he stared back at you with a grin on his lips. There was a fondness in his eyes, a look you always saw on Jiminâs face. Namjoon wore it too.
âWhat?â you asked when the expression wouldnât disappear.
âItâs just-âÂ
He sighed and shook his head.
âWhat?â you repeated, but Seokjin wouldnât continue.
âYou guys are just cute,â Namjoon supplied.
âOh, please,â you scoffed, shaking your head.
âYou guys are exactly like Jin and Mina used to be,â Yoongi said, coming up next to you, having witnessed the entire exchange from his spot on the couch.
âWhat?â you laughed, shaking your head over and over again. âI have no idea what-â
âDonât deny it, Y/N,â Namjoon laughed and looked at you.
âItâs gross really,â Yoongi scoffed, taking a sip from his beer. âHow smitten he is for you. How happy andââ He shuddered for the drama of it all but wore a smile on his lips. ââstupidly in love you two are.â
Wait, what?
âItâs cute,â Seokjin corrected, and you stared at him with stunned silence.Â
âIs it though?â
âDonât be like that, Yoongs. When have you ever seen Kook this happy before?âÂ
The question, though not directed at you at all, made you freeze. And when you looked at Yoongi and he made no effort to disagree, you froze.
âYou make him really happy,â Namjoon said with a smile and tilted his head when you didnât speak or react at all, giving your shoulder a light squeeze. âYou know that, right?â
His words hit you like a ton of bricks, crashing down on you and compressing your lungs. Because, no, you didnât. You didnât think about it ever, and why would you? It never seemed possible to you because it simply wasnât possible you made Jungkook happy. You didnât have that power over him.
Was this really how you looked like to othersâtwo people who were in love and happy? It sounded ridiculous to you, impossible. So much so, you just had to shake your head and wave your hand around as if the words loomed in front of you and had to be physically dismissed. Your heart banged in your ribcage, loud and far too heavy.
âYou guys are exaggerating!â you chuckled, voice wavering the slightest bit. âThis has nothing to do with me- Finals are over and itâs Christmas, so obviously-â
A single look from them was all it took to silence you. They didnât have to say a word for you to know what they were collectively thinking.
âY/N, donât be ridiculous,â Seokjin said.
âFor godâs sake, just look at that boy,â Yoongi laughed, pointing behind you, and your gaze followed his hand. Right then Jungkook came back with two drinks, one for you and one for him.Â
He seemed surprised, stilling as he saw that you were all looking at him. But he recovered, mouth pulling into a big smile. Your eyes met his. You would have missed it if you hadnât looked so close and paid attention to every little thing he did. But you saw it, the tiny smile he offered you, and only you. It was like a little secret. Just for you and him to know and share and see.Â
Did you really make him happy?
âWhy are you guys staring at me like that?â Jungkook laughed, coming to a stop in front of you and handing you your drink. You took it passively, and purely from the warmth, you knew it was your favourite, green tea. âAre you guys talking shit about me?â
âOh, yeah, you know just the usual shit talking we do about you,â Namjoon snorted.
âMhm, the usual stuff. How you always-â
Seokjinâs voice faded away when Jungkook moved closer to you, his arm already lifting to sneak around your middle. But you couldnât do this. Not now.
âSorry, I gotta pee,â you mumbled, wringing out of Jungkookâs grasp, his fingers just barely brushing your skin. You didnât know who you interrupted, but you offered them all an apologetic look but you never quite looked at Jungkook. Your exit seemed natural enough though, you thought. No one made an effort to stop you.
Some of your drink spilt over when you put it down on the coffee table too quickly, and you even almost bumped into Hoseok, but rather than apologise properly and clean up your mess, you hurried into the bathroom.Â
The moment the lock clicked shut behind you, you let yourself crumble, knees giving in. If only just a little.Â
Oh God.
It wasnât very environmentally friendly, not very Save the Turtles! kind of behaviour of you at all as you just let the water run and run into the sink and down the drain. You didnât even wash your hands or face, just needing something to fill the silence as you sat on the edge of the bathtub and let yourself calm down.
You felt ridiculous. You truly did. Insane and crazy even. The behaviour you were exhibiting was probably therapist worthy. The panic. For what? And why? It was behaviour you never imagined yourself exhibiting. No less because of Jeon Jungkook. But here you were, playing his pretend girlfriend for money so he could win a bet. And you got all of your friends involved even! You should have really thought this through-
âCabbage?â
And somehow, both dread and warmth crept up with his voice. You closed your eyes, thinking for a second to shut off the tap. It seemed just a little too exhausting to do that.
âYeah?âÂ
âAre you good?â
âYeah.â
It was quiet for a few seconds.
âCan I come in?â
âIâm peeing, Jeon.â
A lie. He knew. You knew.
âFine, come in.â
When you wouldnât move, Jungkook gave the door handle a try, surprised to see you hadnât locked it. You had forgotten, and so he did it for you instead. The moment he saw you sitting on the edge of the bathtub with the tap carelessly running, he stopped, features folding into something nice, pleasant, empathetic.
âStop,â you groaned, rolling your eyes and turning away from him, shutting off the tap as if that minimised how sad you had to look right now.
Jungkook chuckled, burying his hands into his pants, carefully walking towards you. He sat down next to you, knee pressed against yours. Neither of you pulled away. There was a part of you that should tell him to give you space, but you couldnât. If anything, you turned a little to him.
âHow are you always running off into the bathroom when you feel bad? Itâs so obvious,â he mumbled, pinching your nose.
âOw, stop!â you hissed, swatting his hand aside.Â
He gave you a look, shaking his head, and you pouted like a child would. It made him chuckle, and you tensed when Jungkook put his head on yours, too tall to lean against your shoulder comfortably, his eyes falling shut.Â
âWhat did they say?â Jungkook asked, breaking the silence after a while.
âWhat?â
âJoon and the others. What did they say to make you run off like that?â
You pressed your lips together, disliking that you were so easy to read.
âWho sent you?â you snorted, wanting to figure out which of your friends just earned themselves a plus point.
âNo one.â
âWhat?â you blinked, and looked at him, but he kept his eyes closed. âSo you-â
âNo one sent me. I just⌠wanted to make sure you were fine myself.â
And hearing that was somehow utterly awful. Because it meant Jungkook cared. At least to some degree, at least enough to want to check on you. It meant that he was able to read you so easily, that he really knew you.
âNow, what did they say? You can tell me. Iâll talk to them for you. Or I wonât if you donât want me-â
You shook your head, sighing. âNothing. They said nothing.â
It was true. Because none of what Namjoon, Seokjin, and Yoongi said was worth running off. It wasnât insulting, or hurtful.Â
âAre you sure? Seriously, you can just tell me. Iâd talk to-â
âIâm serious,â you interrupted, not even wanting to hear how far Jungkook would go for you. âThey said nothing. I just had to pee.â You shrugged. âAnd I just needed a moment to breathe. Itâs nothing. I promise.â
Jungkook sat up, glancing at you with his mouth pursed and eyes narrowed. âSo just a moment to breathe?â
Your hand almost came up to cup his cheek, the urge to brush over the little scar on his cheekbone tempting you. It was difficult to resist when he was looking at you like that. There was this need, to plant your lips against his. Kiss him and assure him. But you didnât let yourself. You turned your head to the other side, curling your hand around the cool porcelain of the bathtub until the skin stretched thin over your knuckles and almost hurt. Just anything but Jungkook and his stupidly pretty face.
âJust a moment to breathe,â you mumbled.Â
Jungkook hummed, straightening up. He let his head hang for a few seconds before lifting it up again and turning to you.
âIs it fine if I stay with you then?â
It was a delicate question, an honest question, a devastating heartbreaking question. Because of course, he could. Of course! He could do anything, as long as he remained by your side. And that realisation, albeit not entirely new to you (you were aware of it to some degree all along), was mortifying.Â
You closed your eyes, a knot forming in your throat. There was nothing for you to say, a silence stretching between you. A silence Jungkook took as a âyesâ, and when his hand gripped yours, it was sealed for you. You didnât pull away, put your head on his shoulder. What would be the use of resisting? What good would it do? What would it change? Nothing.
So you enjoyed it instead, the moment between him and you. For as long as you could. For now.
âWe should probably get back out,â you mumbled when you heard the laughter get louder in the living room.Â
âProbably.â
And yet, neither of you moved. A few more moments passed. It was the next bound of laughter that ripped you out.
âWe should-â
âI think itâs time-â
You both stopped, nodding, knowing. Jungkook was first to get up, groaning like an old man before turning to you and offering you his hand. With one loud sigh, you took it, allowing him to pull you up. You shared a look and a smile.
It felt like you were walking into another world when you stepped outside, still holding hands. Before it was just Jungkook and you. Now it was everyone else too. And almost as if you had said that exact thought out loud, everyone looked at you as you walked back in. You stopped, the same way Jungkook had when he had returned and found you all staring at him. You frowned, the grin spreading on Jiminâs and Jisooâs (When had she made it back?) faces worrying you. Jungkook seemed as clueless as you.
âWhat?â
No one said anything for a second.Â
âCan I?â Jisoo asked, pleading with everyone else, and you narrowed your eyes. She was giddy, and her being giddy was never a good sign, especially for you. Most times it meant youâd be miserable.
âDo the honours,â Jimin said, gesturing for her to ahead.
Jisoo leaned back, grinning from ear to ear. She seemed to stretch the moment thin, take her sweet time to reveal to you what exactly entertained her so much. Jennie shook her head next to her, but she wore a smile on her lips, amused.
You kept close to Jungkook, almost instinctively. As if he could protect you. His hand brushed the small of your back, soothing. Taehyungâs irritating snicker grabbed your attention for a second, but before you could frown at him for it, Jisoo spoke,
âLook up.â
Fuck. You should have figured.
âAh,â Jungkook laughed upon seeing the mistletoe above your heads.Â
âYou guys are funny,â you scoffed, shaking your head. âAnd very cute for thinking that we are gonna do-â
âYou have to!â Jimin interjected, leaning forward and pointing at the two of you. âItâs the law. The rules of the game.â
You frowned, and the lines deepened even more when you saw everyone from Namjoon, Seokjin and Jennie to Taehyung, Hoseok, Yoongi and Jisoo nodding along. Of course, they found pleasure in your misery.Â
âItâs bad luck if you donât,â Hoseok reminded you of the stupid rules, and you could have thrown something at him. How was no one on your side?
âThatâs⌠made up.â
âWell, if you wanna risk the bad luck, be my guest,â Hoseok chuckled, shrugging, and you rolled your eyes.Â
âOh, please, no one believes that!âÂ
But you were met with no ounce of support from anyone. You turned to Jungkook, expecting that he was equally as ticked off as you. But he seemed perfectly fine, his features not even slightly twisted into anything resembling irritation. If anything, he was smiling a little when you met his eyes.Â
âI donât know, Iâm never one to tempt fate,â he said, and you couldnât quite decide how to react. Jungkook reached for your hand again, playing with your fingers. âWhy risk the bad luck? Also, itâs not like we have never kissed in front of them.â He grinned. âRemember how you jumped me and-â
âOh my God, I didnât jump you!â Your voice leapt up a few pitches too high and remained there when your friends began to laugh.
âNow thatâs a lie. You practically threw yourself at-â
âJeon!â
Jungkook cackled, and you could have strangled him right then and there. Your friends laughed too, and you would have snapped at them if your cheeks didnât warm to an uncomfortable degree. To the point the blood boiled in your ears, so much so you didnât even hear Namjoonâs holler about how it was just a kiss!
It wasnât completely lost on you that it was stupid to be embarrassed, considering how boldly you had claimed Jungkook as yours in front of a room of strangers just a few weeks ago. Especially considering that all of your friends had a slight alcohol level going on anyway already and were most definitely moving on the second the kiss happened. But it was different. At the Halloween party, you were positively buzzed, your vision blurry and fuzzy. But more importantly, you were jealous to the point of turning green. It seemed so much more intimate to kiss Jungkook in front of everyone now. And so very vulnerable because you wanted to so much. Kiss him. You always did these days, yearned to. That desire scared you, was mortifying in more ways than you could describe, particularly in this moment because what if they could all sense it? What if Jungkook realised it all of a sudden? That you really wanted this? That your entire heart ached for him?Â
And as if you had the fear written all over your face, Jungkook reached for you, tugging on your elbow and turning you back to him. He gave you a smile, his head tilted to the side. A few strands slipped out of his perfectly messy hair, and a soft shadow covered half his face. Right then, he seemed all so delicate to you, so good, so precious. It was instant, your heartbeat dwindled into something calmer and wilder at the same time. Somehow, it seemed almost easy and much more difficult to kiss him and pretend it didnât dig daggers into your heart. None of it made sense, the effect he had on you, but you supposed a lot of things hadnât made sense in your life since Jungkookâs first appearance.
âItâs just a kiss, cabbage,â he mumbled, shrugging.Â
It was. It was just a kiss, to your friends, to him. It was nothing, a small price you had to pay to entertain your friends. It was fun and simple. It was just unfortunate that it was so much more to you.Â
You held your breath when Jungkook placed a hand on your cheek, thumb brushing over your cheekbone, gentle and soothing. He was doing everything right, and yet, you could have thrown up right then and there. Jimin gasped and squeaked as Jungkook inched closer to you, Jisoo grasping onto his arm because oh my God, they were going to kiss! All while you were desperately, almost frantically, fisting Jungkookâs shirt, as if you would float away otherwise and it was the only thing keeping you on the ground.
And Jungkook kissed you all too delicately.
To the point, you could have believed him. That you meant something to him, that he might just be in love with you. It was horrible, to be kissed like that. You werenât sure if this was how it felt like, to be in love and to be loved. You hoped it wasnât.
You pulled him closer to you, deepened the kiss, allowed him in. For just a while, you told yourself. Just until you found the strength in you to resist him, until you deemed your own well-being more important than these fleeting highs with Jungkook.
âAlright, dinnerâs- oh.âÂ
Chaeyoung stopped right before she could bump into you, and you quickly pulled away. But Jungkook kept holding you, not letting go of you. Chaeyoung placed her hands on her hips and shot Jimin and Jisoo a long look.
âAh, who of you idiots did this?âÂ
âWhy do you assume it was-â
âSo it was you,â Chaeyoung said, interrupting Jimin and shaking her head. âTake it off. Dinnerâs ready.â
Jisoo slapped his shoulder, laughing, clearly enjoying seeing him getting reprimanded by Chaeyoung. Jimin rolled his eyes, mumbling something about how Chaeyoung was no fun but he followed her orders, getting up and reaching for the bundle above your heads. You backed away-actually you jumped. It made Jimin pause and narrow his eyes, his mouth lifting into a smile when he saw the opportunity.
âOh, what if I hold it over you-â
âNo, donât even!â you hissed, pushing Jimin away from you and seeking refuge behind Chaeyoung.Â
âOh, itâs just one more kiss, Y/N!â Jimin taunted, following you. You shrieked, moving further from him, irritated by the constant laughter spilling from his throat. He was enjoying this too much. Too much!
âFuck off!â
âDonât be like-â
âIâm serious, stop!â
âItâs fun-â
âOkay, no, enough,â Jungkook said, stepping in and swiftly taking the mistletoe from Jimin. He slapped him with it lightly, eliciting a gasp from Jimin. âNo more chasing my girlfriend with mistletoe, okay? Or you can do your physics assignments on your own.âÂ
Rubbing his cheek, almost convinced he was allergic to mistletoe now, Jimin gasped as if Jungkook had just declared an end to their friendship. âKook! How could you say that?â
âStop chasing my girlfriend then.â
âOh my God, fine, I wonât,â Jimin groaned, pouting. âYouâre so lame.â
When he reached for the mistletoe, Jungkook hesitated, looking over to you and even though you preferred him not to hold it in his hands again, you knew Jimin would get even more offended if Jungkook withheld the bundle from him. So you gave him a nod.Â
âOkay, alright, dinnerâs getting cold,â Chaeyoung said, clapping her hands together when Jimin was back in possession of his mistletoe. âSo how about we take this party into the kitchen, yeah?â
Like you had said he would, Jungkook got an earful from Chaeyoung when she noticed the expensive bottle of wine suddenly appear on the dinner table because how dare you bring something when I clearly said not to? And on top of that such an expensive bottle too. Do you shit money? Somebody needs to teach you how to manage your finances. Rather than come to his help, you left Jungkook to fend for himself which earned you puppy eyes from him, but hadnât you told him better? Surprisingly however he managed to convince her to open the bottle anyway. You were sure sheâd get him to return it, or at least take it home again. Jungkook could be very compelling. But you knew that already.Â
âIf the teaching thing doesnât work outââ Namjoon had his mouth stuffed as he spoke, and you caught Yoongi cringing next to him. ââI think you should become a cook, Chae.â
She smiled sheepishly, waving him off. âOh, please. My momâs cooking is so much better.â
âI donât know if I believe you,â he laughed. âThis is seriously so good.â
Hoseok shoved a big bite into his mouth, a drop of sauce splashing onto the table. Chaeyoung smiled and wiped it off for him. He thanked her.
âItâs the best food on Earth. Iâd die for it,â Jimin sighed, a little too loud and dramatic, his mouth full with food, giving you all a glimpse into what his stomach must look like. His cheeks were tinted a slight pink, the red wine slowly flushing him through. âLike that one Gordon Ramsey meme? Where you knowââ He sat up, changing his voice in a failed attempt to mimic the British celebrity chef. ââheâs like âFinally some good fucking food.â or whatever. Thatâs how I always feel when I eat Chae.â
For a second, there was silence. Jungkook and you looked at each other with big eyes, a hint of a smile on your lips because it was obvious that Jimin hadnât realised what he had said, blabbering on and on without a second thought.
âMaybe you should calm it on the alcohol,â Seokjin mumbled, pushing Jiminâs glass away from him. But it had the opposite effect, making him reach for it instead and down the entire contents of his glass in one quick go.
âNever!â
âYou mean⌠her food. When you eat her food, you could cry, right?â Taehyung clarified, and Jimin looked at him with big eyes.
âOh, yes of course! What else would I mean?â he laughed, loud and boisterous. âChaeâs all yours, Seok. Donât worry. Iâm not your competition.âÂ
Chaeyoung almost choked on the wine, and Hoseok turned a few shades redder.Â
âSomeone get this idiot some water,â Yoongi snorted, and Namjoon already got up.
You turned your gaze to Jisoo when she leaned into you, taking the chaos as a chance to just talk to you, her hand grabbing yours.
âHowâs the scarf going by the way? Are your loops now clean?â she whispered, careful to keep her voice low. You glanced towards Jungkook, but he was busy trying to convince Jimin to drink a few sips from the water at least. And though he hadnât heard a word, you glared at Jisoo, shaking your head.
âNot with him around,â you hissed, and she rolled her eyes.
âOh, look at him. Heâs not paying us attention. I wanna know. Iâm invested now, especially because you always called me a grandma for knitting. Howâs it going?â she asked, and you knew it was best to just quickly answer her because she wasnât dropping this.
âYeah, yeah, I got it now. Itâs almost done-â
âWhat are you guys whispering about?â Jennie asked, leaning in, eyes wandering between Jisoo and you.
âY/Nâs knitting a scarf for her boyfriend for Christmas.â
âJi!âÂ
Your features couldnât decide whether or not to contort in embarrassment or fear Jungkook had overheard this time. Itâd ruin your surprise. You were in luck though because he wasnât paying your conversation any mind.
âOh, thatâs cute!â Jennie squealed. âI only thought Ji knits. I didnât know you knit too, Y/N.â
âI-â
âShe doesnât. She just sews a little,â Jisoo said, beating you to it. She leaned towards Jennie as if she was telling her a secret and didnât want you to hear, but she deliberately kept eye contact with you and didnât even lower her voice, her lips curling up. âShe learned how to knit for her stupid little boyfriend. She asked me so many questions and bought so much yarn too. It was so annoying-â
You kicked Jisoo in the shin, shutting her up. She sharply sucked in her breath, hands flying to her leg, mouth agape in a silent screech.
âYouâre talking too much,â you hissed, not remorseful at all even as she rubbed her shin. Jennie laughed.Â
âThatâs really cute of you though, Y/N,â she said, smiling at you. âI like the idea. Heâs gonna love it.â
âItâs just a scarf,â Jisoo mumbled, rolling her eyes, words dipping into an astonishing amount of immaturity. âItâs not that cute. I could knit you a better scarf-â
âStop bragging. Itâs different. Youâve always knit. Y/N made an effort to learn how to for Kook.â
âIâd learn how to do something new for you.â
âSo do.â
âWhat? Like I wonât?â
You took that as your cue to exit the conversation, glancing over to Jungkook instead. He hadnât noticed your conversation at all. In fact, he was stuffing his mouth full. Some extra sauce decorated the corner of his mouth in his haste. Without missing a beat, you wiped it off with your thumb before cleaning it on his napkin. He turned to you, eyes as big as a reindeer caught in headlights. It hit you only then as he stared at you and you stared at him, what you had done. How intimate the nature of the gesture had been. You might as well have ripped out your heart and told him to keep it. It would have been the same.
âDid⌠you just-â
âOh, the wine is actually so good!â Jisoo sighed, putting down her glass, and right now you were very glad she sat next to you. âI think thatâs the best wine Iâve ever had.â
Jungkookâs eyes darted between her and you. He was thinking, contemplating if heâd engage with Jisoo in a conversation, or tease you until you were just about ready to be swallowed by a hole. Maybe it was the way you wouldnât even look in his direction and kept your gaze trained on Jisoo, or maybe because he was planning on bringing it up another time, but in the end, he decided to spare you.
âIâm happy to hear you like it,â he grinned before jabbing you in the side. You flinched, grabbing his hand before he could do it again. âSee, and you said they wouldnât taste the difference.â
âShe doesnât,â you grumbled, brows creased together.
âSheâs just saying that because she knows how expensive it is,â Taehyung said, and for once you agreed. Jisoo rolled her eyes at him, mumbling something about not wanting to argue with an idiot and picking a piece of lint off of Jennieâs shoulder instead.
Jungkook shrugged. âWhatever. She likes it, so worth every penny.â
You were about to let go of his hand, feeling any kind of contact was a step too much, a step into a very wrong and dangerous direction. But Junkook interlaced his fingers with yours, holding it firm, thumb brushing over the back of your hand. For a second, you contemplated pulling away because this was too much, too close. You didnât, not finding the strength in you to do it.Â
âActually, I havenât learned half of my momâs cooking. She always makes this amazing pork belly stew for every Christmas. If you love this, youâll love that,â Chaeyoung said, pulling you into their conversation that seemed to have circled back to her cooking.
âAre you gonna go back home for Christmas? Because Iâll go with you if so. That stew sounds amazing,â Yoongi said.
âOh my God, if you are, please take me with you too because this is so good,â Jennie sighed dreamily, making Chaeyoung laugh.Â
âExcuse me, what about our Christmas plans?â Jisoo gasped with faux upset, and immediately Hoseok, Chaeyoung, Jimin and you exchanged glances.Â
Moving fast, Hoseok mouthed and you nodded. You had no idea. At the same time, it seemed to work for them.
âOh, canât we just drop by for dinner really quickly for some food?â Jennie tried, pursing her lips into a pout, but Jisoo just clicked her tongue and shook her head.
âGood food is all it takes, huh?â
Jennie laughed.
âIs everyone going home for Christmas?â Namjoon asked, wiping his mouth before grabbing his glass of wine, holding it up to his lips, speaking into it. âI know Kook is for sure.â
Jungkook nodded. âGot me there.â
And even without looking at him, you knew he was smiling and more than excited to go back home. He squeezed your hand, and you could tell he did so unconsciously. You squeezed back, happy for him that he was happy.
âOh, right, Iâve been meaning to ask!â Jimin gasped, turning rather dramatically towards you. You blinked, unsure of what was about to spill from his lips.
âIs it true that youâre going back home with Kook, Y/N?âÂ
What?
Everyone turned to you, Chaeyoung raising her brow at you because were you? You stared back at her, mouth opened and closing because no, right? You werenât, or were you? Your eyes lifted to Jungkook, and he had that same look on his face. Neither of you knew what to say or do. This wasnât something you had discussed. And why would you have? Itâd be ridiculous to assume that youâd be going back home with Jungkook to meet his parents for Christmas.
âUh-?â
âIâm just asking because Kookâs parents have been asking me if I knew if heâs actually gonna bring you,â Jimin continued, shrugging. And maybe you would have focused on how much you wanted to strangle him right now and needed him to shut up if your mind wasnât reeling from the fact that Jungkook seemed to have not only told his parents about your existence but also that you would be spending Christmas with them.
What?
âOkay, yeah, no, wait,â Jungkook interjected, a clear panic in his voice, turning fully to you. âI can explain.â
You blankly stared at him, unable to even make a single sound. He dug a hand through his hair, looking even more panicked the longer you said nothing.
âSo, uh, my brother saw my posts and stories online and might have told my parents⌠that Iâm dating you. And so theyâve been really curious and asking about you a lot, and it was a little annoying, so I just told them that I might bring you around for Christmas to shut them up. Butââ He held out his hand as if to get ahead of you saying anything. ââI didnât promise them anything. I just said it to get them off my back, you know?â
You continued staring at him, unsure of how to react or what to say because well, you hadnât thought that either of your parents were ever going to get involved in any shape or form. You hadnât even played with the idea of telling your parents. And why would you? All of this was fake! A ruse, so Jungkook could win his stupid bet!
âIt wasnât planned, or anything, okay? I wasnât going to tell them about you-â
âYou werenât?â Jimin blurted out, brows pinching together. He seemed to have lost all ability to read the room, just a glass or two of wine enough to dull his brain. âOw-!â
He glared at Taehyung, rubbing his arm. It still wasnât enough to shut him up however.Â
âWhat was that for? Iâm just saying Iâm a little surprised that Jungkook, the definition of a mamaâs and papaâs boy, was planning on keeping his girlfriend a secret when he hasnât shut up about Y/N for months-â
âNo, wait itâs not like that,â Jungkook quickly scrambled, gesturing wildly. âItâs just that my parents, you know, can get a little much. And, I donât know-â
His sentence didnât find an end, and Jimin seemed to just take that as a sign to go on,Â
âDidnât Narae meet-â
âOkay, how about you finish your food, huh?â Taehyung interrupted, taking Jiminâs fork and picking up a big piece of meat before shoving it into his mouth. Namjoon and Seokjin exchanged glances, cringing. Yoongi lowered his head, and Jennie slid down on her seat. Chaeyoung looked at you with big empathetic eyes and Jisoo even gave your hand a squeeze.Â
If there was anything genuine between you, this would have been devastating. Luckily, there wasnât. So it couldnât hurt. And yet, your heart felt like it was bleeding in your chest, a dagger shoved in, a dagger with Jungkookâs name. He was staring holes into you, but you couldnât look at him, settling on the edge of the table instead. You werenât hurt. You werenât hurt that Narae with her perfect smile and manicured nails and beautiful hair and glossy lips got to meet his parents and you didnât. It didnât bother you at all! That was what you told yourself at least. Because you couldnât possibly be hurt. Not when your relationship was transactional and just an act. And yet, to your misery, you were hurt, deeply. You hated it, how you werenât all that unbothered as you wanted and more importantly, should be.Â
You were pulled out of your thoughts though when you saw the glare Hoseok was looking at Jungkook with. It dawned on you how awful all of it had to sound to your friends then. Narae, who never even was Jungkookâs official girlfriend, got to meet his parents, but you, who was officially (at least to them) his girlfriend, he not only didnât want to introduce to them but also planned on keeping a secret?
âOh my God, you guys!â you laughed, loud and light, like it was all so very dumb and stupid. With a big swoop, you grabbed Jungkookâs hand on the table, hoping no one saw the shake in your fingers. Everyone looked at you.
âYouâre misunderstanding. We had agreed from the beginning that we should take it a little slower, and not tell everyone immediately. I knew he wasnât going to tell his parents. I told him not to.â You put on your most convincing smile, swallowing the knot in your throat, hoping desperately it was enough. Everyone was looking at you, and you looked right back at them, at everyone except for Jungkook. Your vision almost blurred, hazy at the edges, feeling your composure threaten to slip.
âItâs nothing.â
There was a slight shake in your voice, the tiniest of a waver. You couldnât tell if your friends noticed, their faces unreadable to you. A moment of silence stretched across the room, the food long forgotten about. In the end, it was slightly tipsy Jimin, the one who started it all, to break the awkwardness.
âOkay, well, do I text them⌠yes or-?â
You wondered if Jimin was this stupid, or trying to put you through hell on purpose. His question made Taehyung next to him sigh and shake his head, lips pressed together as he stared daggers into the older one.
âWhat?â Jimin whispered, offended. Maybe you should have taken the wine from him sooner.Â
You looked at Jungkook finally. He didnât seem to have an answer at all, his eyes big and wide like a childâs. There was something in them that you couldnât quite pinpoint. It almost seemed like he wanted you to agree, say yes, of course, youâd meet his parents. You had to be imagining it. As quickly as it had come, you squashed the thought.
It was up to you. The decision was in your hands. Everyone was waiting for your answer. Jungkook would have to go with whatever you were saying, whether or not he liked it.Â
A lot of it was probably spite, spite that Narae met them already and you hadnât. And how would it look if you werenât there when Jungkook inevitably made a post about being back home with his family and you werenât there in the pictures? What would Narae think? You could already see a backhanded Instagram story in front of your eyes, how there was trouble in paradise. It was something you wouldnât put past her at all, seeing as she had done so before, posting just an hour after Jungkook celebrated your one month anniversary about how cringe some couples could be. Anyone doubting your relationship might just lead to Taehyung doubting your relationship and then to Jungkook losing his bet and all of this would have been for nothing. That couldnât happen, right? You had to do something against it!
âThey probably wonât stop bothering you until you tell them yes, right?âÂ
You tried your hardest to sound casual, nonchalant, chill as some might say. This was no big deal, you told yourself.
It wasnât what Jungkook had expected. He thought youâd give some roundabout answer that in the end summarised that you needed to keep things slow and easy. But you agreed. You were going to meet his parents. He searched for something in your features, anything to tell him how you genuinely felt about it. He was trying to read you, but it was like he had the wrong dictionary.Â
âIf thatâs alright with you-â Maybe it was to hit the nail on the head, finish it off, you couldnât say. But the urge was strong right then, just once to say it. ââbabe?â
You turned to him and looked at him almost confidently. It was both your face and the pet name, but Jungkook couldnât help but laugh. Of course, now you were going to call him babe. A grin spread across his lips.
âOkay, yeah.â He held your hand firmer and tighter. âIâd be more than happy for you to meet my parents. Theyâd be thrilled.â
He was a great liar. It sounded oh so very genuine.
You squeezed his hand and turned to Jimin. âI guess you can text them Iâm going.â
âI think that was it,â Jungkook said, handing you the last few dirty plates.Â
âAlright,â you hummed, moving around some of the dishes to make some more space in the dishwasher.Â
âOh,â Chaeyoung exclaimed in surprise upon seeing Jungkook standing there with you, âyou can head out first. Iâll help Y/N.âÂ
She wore a smile on her lips, but you knew better.Â
âItâs fine. Iâll just help-â
âNo, really, get out,â Chaeyoung interrupted, slipping just the slightest bit and you gave Jungkook a look, almost reaching out for his hand and giving it a squeeze. She was curt, too curt. It surprised him, clearly. âIâm the host. Iâll clean up. Join the others in the living room.â
You offered him a nod, and with that Jungkook slipped out, receiving a more genuine smile and a quiet thank you from Chaeyoung on the way out because she knew he was more than confused by her just now. Before he even had the chance to turn to ask whether or not he should close the door, she did herself. You knew to prepare yourself, putting the stack of dishes aside. She folded her arms in front of her stomach.
This was an interrogation.
In another world (read: in a detective TV show), thereâd be a metal table between you and youâd be handcuffed to it. A clock would decorate the blank walls, ticking away in the background, and the air would be chilly and humid, stifling almost. Chaeyoung would dramatically slide pictures across to you, and they would be incriminating ones, blurry but clearly depicting you in the middle of whatever crime you were accused of. She would point at them and tell you how you had one chance to tell her the truth.
âHow are you?â
Just the question almost made you laugh. It was heartwarming. You knew exactly what she was trying to get out of youâif it hurt you at all that Narae had met Jungkookâs parents and he had seemingly wanted to keep you a secret. You dried your hands on the kitchen towel.
âIâm fine, thanks. How are you-â
âAre you lying?â
She took this very seriously, her face not even holding a hint of a smile. Again, in another world sheâd stare you down, gaze cold and unwavering, and ask if you wanted to try again.
âDo I look like I am lying?â
You were lying about all of it, about most things concerning Jungkook and you these days. But you couldnât say that. You couldnât admit that the entire conversation during dinner hurt you to the degree it did, to a degree you would rather not admit, that it hurt at all to begin with. Because being hurt implied you had some sort of right to be, implied Jungkook owed you⌠something. And that was just not true.
Chaeyoung paused, sizing you up. It was hard to figure out what conclusion she came to, her eyes narrowed and sharp. She opened her mouth, but right then, someone announced themselves with a knock on the door. Without waiting, they poked their head in, and it could realistically only be one person.Â
âWhat did she say?â Jisoo asked.
Were you air today?
âSays sheâs fine,â Chaeyoung said, wrinkling her nose.
âYou donât believe her?â Jisoo slipped inside and slowly closed the door, making sure beforehand though that no one was in earshot. Chaeyoung scrutinised you for another moment before coming to her conclusion with a long sigh.
âNo, I do.â She paused before looking at you. âYou know Iâd- weâd rip him into pieces for you, right?â
You had no doubt for a second they would. Actually, all of your friends would, but Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be the first ones to throw a punch.
âI do, and I love you guys for it,â you say, smiling genuinely because God, you did love your friends so much. âBut you donât have to because Iâm fine. And like I said, we had talked about it. You know how I am. Parents arenât my thing.â
âWell, for that you just agreed to go meet them,â Jisoo mumbled, scrunching her nose, and you swallowed. Maybe it was hearing it from someone else, or maybe it was because you were no longer sitting around the dinner table with everyone expectedly staring at you and awaiting for an explanation, but it finally hit you. What exactly you had agreed to. Once your mind wasnât clouded with the thought of Narae, you realised that oh my God, you were meeting Jungkookâs parents.
It was funny how quickly things could change. How just a few minutes ago, you didnât worry about it at all, only thinking of Narae and her stupid perfect grin and the fact she had met them, and now you were worried because what would they say about you? Would they like you? What if they were like Jaehwaâs parents and-
âNow, donât make that face,â Chaeyoung interrupted, putting a hand on your shoulder, noticing your spiral. âTheyâre gonna like you.â
âYeah, you donât have anything to worry about at all, Y/N,â Jisoo reassured. âIf anything, they should be on their best behaviour. Because if notâŚâ
And like the amazing friend she was, Jisoo started punching the air, showing you her swift moves that she would put on Jungkookâs parents.Â
âCanât you see? They say one wrong thing, and itâd be over for them. Ji would do these weird punches and knock them right out,â Chaeyoung said. âItâs gonna be fine. Has to.â
âAlso, with the way Jungkook acts with you, letâs be honest heâs head over heels for you,â Jisoo argued, putting an arm around you. âI can see him standing up for you.â
âYeah, I hate to give a man any credit, but he would.â
âAnd again, if he doesnâtâŚâ Jisoo didnât finish her sentence, instead showing you her oh so brilliant and not wobbly but actually super fatal kick.
They both turned to you, and you slowly nodded. Maybe they were right. You didnât necessarily think Jungkook would stand up for you, not because you didnât believe he would but because you didnât even let yourself go there. If you did, if you assumed he would do something like that for you, youâd be having expectations for him and you had no right to. But you knew that Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be there for you, and it was a comforting thought. That was enough. Your friends were enough. And maybe, you just liked to believe them tooâthat it would all somehow turn out just fine.
âYeah, I guess,â you mumbled.
âItâs gonna be fine!â Chaeyoung repeated, squeezing your shoulder.
Before you could dwell on it any further, a knock on the kitchen door interrupted you.Â
âYeah?â Jisoo said, and a moment later, Hoseok stuck his head in, offering an apologetic smile because he obviously knew what was going on in here.
âSorry to interrupt, but Jimin asked for you, Chae,â he said, sounding unsure. He clearly hadnât gotten a reason as to why he was supposed to call for Chaeyoung. She frowned and seemed less than willing to go, but you saw this as a great opportunity to put an end to this conversation and move on. Ignoring the fact you were going to meet Jungkookâs parents wasnât going to solve the issue, but right now your brain felt mushy and drained. Too much of todayâs focus had been on you, you couldnât do it any longer.
âLetâs just all go,â you said. âWeâve been here for too long anyway.â
Jisoo agreed, mumbling something about how she couldnât leave Jennie alone with all of the guys outside any longer, not in good conscience at least. She helped you put the last few plates into the dishwasher, and hooked her arm with yours as you made your way back into the living room, her head resting on your shoulder.
âDid he say what he wanted?â Chaeyoung asked Hoseok, the two walking behind you.Â
âProbably something stupid.â
And indeed it was.
Because the moment Jisoo and you had made it past the doorstep, Jimin jumped up and pointed at Chaeyoung and Hoseok. The two froze, all eyes on them, and when you turned to look, you found them in the same fate as Jungkook and you had been in earlier.
âOh, Jimin,â you chuckled, shaking your head. He beamed with pride, chest out and a grin bigger than his entire face.Â
âWe arenât-â Chaeyoung couldnât even finish her sentence, sputtering for words. âNo! This is⌠stupid!â
âYou have to. Otherwise, itâs bad luck,â Jungkook grinned. âThatâs what you said, right, Seok?â
Hoseok looked positively ready to strangle him, but you couldnât have been prouder of him right now. Even though Jimin was the one to orchestrate this, it felt like sweet revenge to get back at Hoseok. And really, you were helping him and Chaeyoung. Maybe today was the day finally something would happen.
âSeok and I arenât- we arenât-â
âItâs just a kiss!â Seokjin said, and you nodded. Because as much as you felt for them, having been in their position, you knew Chaeyoung wouldnât have come to your rescue. She might have disapproved, but she would have definitely enjoyed the show and let it go on until you kissed.
âJust do a quick peck,â Taehyung suggested, pressing a kiss to Yoongiâs cheek to demonstrate. The older one wiped his cheek and shook his head, but there was clear amusement tugging on the corners of his mouth too. You laughed at the absurdity of it all, especially when you caught the embarrassed looks on Chaeyoungâs and Hoseokâs faces.
âAlso if you hadnât walked in together like I had predicted you obviously would, you wouldnât be in this situation,â Jimin said, and Hoseok let out a noise that could only be described as a weak and mangled attempt at faux upset. âYou guys are so clearly in love with each other anyway, just kiss!â
âOh my God,â Chaeyoung let out a scoff, but it sounded pitchy and panicked, âseriously? H-how many times do we have to tell you guys that we are just really good friends? Just like Jimin and Y/N!â
âDonât be ridiculous here, Chae,â you laughed. âJimin and I are just friends, but you two? Oh, please.â
âThere was an attempt, huh?â
Chaeyoung glared at Jisoo, her cheeks gaining a deeper shade of red with every passing second. In a last ditch attempt, she turned to Hoseok, hoping for some backup from him.
âTell them-â
This time when her sentence got lodged in her throat, it was for a very different reason. Because Hoseok was looking at her like he was ready to risk it all in front of everybody. Like he was ready to just say it, do something. And Chaeyoung knew, freezing to a statue.
Jisoo and you looked at each other, gasping. Her nails dug into your arm and you held onto her just as strongly. Your breath hitched in your throat as Hoseok placed a hand on Chaeyoungâs cheek, pausing and hesitating for a moment, as if he waited for her to reject him before ultimately kissing her. And instantly, she pulled him closer.
It was like a scene out of every 2000s romantic comedy, the finale of the third act, what you had all been waiting up to. It was a scene to swoon and die for.Â
A sense of joy you had rarely felt overtook you, a rush. You began shaking Jisoo, mouth split into a grin. As much as you had wanted and actually still wanted to strangle Jimin tonight for bringing that stupid mistletoe, you were just about ready to kiss him (platonically and only figuratively of course).
âSee!â Jimin laughed, pointing at Hoseok and Chaeyoung, both of them flushed red to the tips of their ears. But they were smiling too. This had been good.
âI canât believe that this is how you guys get together,â Jisoo laughed, Chaeyoung and Hoseok looking at each other, his arm wrapped around her middle. They laughed, shrugging.
Jimin proudly pointed at himself, beaming brighter than a Christmas tree. âAll my doing.â
âShut up,â Yoongi laughed, trying and failing to kick him in the knee. And though his attempt wasnât successful, it earned him a thank you! from Chaeyoung. Jimin looked over to Namjoon for some kind of help, but he simply shrugged. He scoffed when he saw Seokjin squeeze Yoongiâs shoulder, mumbling something about how he was just jealous.
âI mean⌠neither did I,â Hoseok chuckled, seeming still completely out of it, unbelieving.
âThought about it a lot, huh?â Taehyung asked, grinning, and for a moment, you could see Hoseok struggling to answer, decide whether or not he wanted to admit the blatant truth, confess that heâd been imagining this more times than he should have. In the end, he cared less about saving face and looking cool, and much more about who he had his arm wrapped around, finally.
âYeah, always.â
And just like that, Chaeyoung pulled him down for another kiss. The sight warmed Jisooâs heart because she turned to Jennie, reaching out for her. With a slight tug, she was at Jennieâs side. You laughed, shaking your head, just to catch Jungkook looking at you. For a moment, you didnât quite know what to do even though you werenât the one caught staring. The same couldnât be said about Jungkook. He didnât seem to care at all, eyes not holding an ounce of uncertainty. It was obvious that he was much more confident and comfortable with being seen by you. Something you still werenât at this point, not entirely at least, not right in this very moment, or⌠actually ever.
Jungkook didnât say anything as he stretched his hand out. You hesitated, if just for a second. Because maybe you shouldnât. Not when your heart was beating the way it was. And yet, you did take it, did let him pull you close and hold you and press his lips to the top of your head.
âYou donât have to meet them if you donât want to.â
He whispered it, spoke in a soft and warm voice. His words floated to your ears, and you knew. You didnât have to do anything ever actually. Not for him at least. He expected nothing from you. You closed your eyes, and listened to his heartbeat in his chest. Strong and firm. It was the opposite of yours. Yours was a mess, thumping and skipping beats.Â
âI will.â
Jungkook smiled as bright as the sun, pressing another kiss to your head. You could feel the excitement rushing through his fingertips, his arm tightening around you. You didnât know the reason for it, his excitement. It didnât make sense why he would be, you werenât his girlfriend after all. You refused to think about it, preferring the bliss of ignorance.
God, you loved him so much. You did. You loved Jungkook to an indescribable amount. And God, was it time to stop all of this.
The video had been playing for less than twenty seconds when the call came in, your phone lighting up beside you. You paused your laptop, his name taking up your entire phone screen. And though Jungkook and you had begun calling each other more frequently now, spending at least once a week on the phone together, you were confused when you glanced at the time. But you accepted the call, sliding your thumb over the glass. Some ruffling met your ears before finally, he came through.
âHi.â
For some reason, there was a smile on your lips.
âWhat do you want?â you laughed, glancing at the time in the upper left corner of your phone. 01:24. âItâs late. Why arenât you sleeping?â
âCould say the same about you,â Jungkook argued, and you rolled your eyes, scoffing slightly, already sensing where this was going. You leaned back into your couch, looking at the ceiling with renewed interest.
âIâm not tired.â
âNeither am I.â
âI donât believe you.â
âThen neither do I.â
âWell, you had a full day of classes today, so you must be at least a little tired,â you shot back, and a beat of silence passed. For a moment, it seemed like you came out victorious.Â
âYou know my schedule?â
The question hung in front of you, and you were glad that this was just a call. Because you could see it, his stupid face. The proud smile on his lips, the grin that adorned it. He would inch closer to you, push you to answer, and you would cave and crumble terribly.Â
â... no.â
And Jungkook began laughing almost immediately, his voice booming through your phone. You cringed, biting your tongue.Â
âIâm going to hang up.â
âNo, no, no, donât,â he said, still laughing however. âIâm sorry.â
His apology didnât sound an ounce sincere, but you were never going to actually hang up. A comfortable silence passed, and you could have stayed on the phone forever.
âOh, have you watched the newest video I sent you yet?â
âYou mean the two hour long video essay about the phenomenal music scoring of Avatar?â you hummed, glancing over to your laptop to see the screen dark already. âYeah, I was about to watch it when you called.â
Somehow, you could hear his smile forming on his lips. âYou should watch it.â
âYeah, I will,â you said, sighing and rolling your eyes.
There was silence for another few seconds.Â
âWhat are you doing?â Jungkook asked, and you could tell he was genuinely curious. You blinked, having completely forgotten what you had been up to until he called. You looked at the ball of yarn sitting in your lap, your attempt at a scarf hanging between the two knitting needles. But you couldnât tell him, it would ruin the surprise.Â
And so, you returned the question instead. âWhat are you doing?â
âI asked you first.â
âI asked you second.â
Jungkook sighed. âYouâre very fun to talk to sometimes, you know?â
You laughed, not missing the irony in his voice. âThanks. You are too.â
âJust tell me,â he said, and you frowned at his poor attempt to get you to talk.Â
âWhy donât you tell me first?â
He let out a small scoff, and you could picture his face perfectly. The way his tongue would be digging into his cheek and his eyes rolling back because God, you were frustrating sometimes! But there would be an undeniable smile on his lips. There always was.Â
âAlright,â Jungkook said, and you raised your brows. âIâm outside.â
You frowned. âWhere are you going? At this hour?â
âWhy donât you guess?âÂ
âJust tell me.â
He paused, hesitated. Somehow, you could hear his grin turn bigger.
âHow about you look outside and see for yourself instead?â
Your heart sank in your chest, something strange taking hold of you. You moved without a thought, almost knocking over one of your pothos sitting on your window sill when you pulled the curtain aside. The glass was cool to touch, but you pressed your entire hand against it, just to feel something steady. Because right now, you felt the opposite of it, heart jumping to your throat and beating there like it was bound to fall out. Because there was no way that he was here right now! This wasnât a cheesy romcom! But you also knew that he wouldnât lie to you.
And he didnât.Â
There he was, standing on the sidewalk, in front of your building, phone pressed to his ear, head in his neck, mouth in a grin and waving up to you.Â
You opened and closed your mouth several times, scoffing in the end and shaking your head.
âYouâre so⌠stupid, Jeon.â
Jungkook laughed, âWell, thatâs been established before.â
âYouâre such a ridiculous stupid little man, Jeon!â you went on, pressing a hand to your forehead and squeezing your eyes closed for a moment. âWhat are you doing here?â
âOh, is it a crime now to drop by your girlfriendâs home when you miss her?â
The words rolled off his tongue with a certain confidence and ease. Two things you rarely ever had, even less around Jungkook. It always seemed so very fragile and dangerous, to be so open and vulnerable. You couldnât snap back, tell him how ridiculous he was because you had just seen each other two days ago at the Christmas party. Hell, you had been spending almost every day with each otherâeither on the phone or in person driving to Seoâs bakery to pick up your needed batch of cookies or watching Avatar until you both could recite every line. And yet here he was, telling you that he missed you, so much so that he needed to see you in the middle of the night, at 1:42.
Right then, it became blatantly obvious to youâthat Jungkook and you had crudely blown the lines you had established beforehand, agreed to contractually, into absolute smithereens, that you two had made new ones, dangerous ones, ones that resembled an actual relationship, and that, even worse, you had not only never talked about it but gotten used to the new rules, comfortable.
And even with that realisation lingering in your mind with big glaring bright red flags hissed high above and every possible alarm blaring in the air, you couldnât bring yourself to tell Jungkook that this was wrong, that he should go home. You should, it would spare your sanity. But your heart had only grown bigger and fonder of him. And it was horrible because you knew even more time with him, alone, in your own four walls, was the worst thing you could do. There would be nowhere for you to go, run off to. But you couldnât send him home. Because really, you didnât want to. Because it did excite you. That he was here. That he had gotten up, changed, and made his way to you. That the cold hadnât even been enough to stop him.
âNow, open up. Itâs freezing. My hands and feet are already blue,â he told you, adding a dramatic shiver to his words.
You paused, frowned, searched and didnât see it anywhere. It clicked with you. You hadnât heard the engine or turn signal during the entirety of your call.Â
âDid you- did you walk here? Why didnât you take your car?â
âFelt like it.â
âYouâre so stupid, oh my God,â you groaned, rolling your eyes as you repeatedly pressed the buzzer to open the front door for him. âNever ever do that again. Itâs freezing outside!â
Jungkook responded with a laugh. It echoed on the walls of your empty lobby, reverberating through the phone. âAlright, I wonât. I promise.â
âAlso, shouldnât you be writing that stupid paper about Newton or Einstein or whatever?â
âItâs not about either of them, but I still have a bit of time until the deadline,â he explained, and you heard him walk up the stairs. âThanks for remembering though.â
You pressed your lips together. âWhat if I was sleeping?â
âBut you arenât.â He sounded so incredibly smug and proud. You could have punched him. âAlso, I know you, cabbage. Youâd rather die than go to bed at a reasonable time.â
And somehow, that admission embarrassed you. It did. Terribly. Because he did, he did know you oh so well.Â
You left the front door ajar for him, waiting there with your hands folded in front of you, fingers picking on each other, as you listened to his steps grow closer and louder. His hand was the first thing you saw, reaching and touching the doorknob, and then it was suddenly just all of him. In front of you. He smiled at your sight, and you knew you looked more embarrassed and unsure than ever before. You were relieved you still hadnât changed the lightbulb that had burned through all those months ago, allowing the dark to obscure you from him, a soft shadow across your face.Â
Jungkook shrugged off his coat, hanging it on the hook behind the front door and revealing his maroon knit sweater and black pants to you. When he looked at you again, his gaze softened.
âHi, cabbage.â His cheeks and nose were brutally red from the wind, but he seemed as happy as ever. âI made you something.â
You noticed the metal lunchbox in his hands only when he pushed it towards you, and when you took it, it was still warm. Like whatever he had prepared, he had packed up the minute it was done and came straight to you.Â
âWhat did you make?â you asked, and you knew he wouldnât tell you, waiting for you to open the lunchbox instead and discover for yourself. You peeled open the lid just a little, revealing a small corner when the smell hit you. Your eyes shot to Jungkook, and he looked both sheepish and proud.Â
âYou didnât.â
A gasp, your features melting. He wrinkled his nose, turned his head to the side.
âI was gonna go get some from Seoâs Bakery, but they- did you know theyâre on Christmas break?â
You nodded, eyes unable to take off of him, blabbering, âYeah, of course. They always are. Every Christmas. Have always been.â
Jungkook made a gesture towards you, shrugging. âWell, so I thought- I donât know. Iâd make you some instead. You gotta fuel your addiction somehow, right?â
There was no denying how many sweet gestures Jungkook had made ever since youâd been doing this (whatever one might classify this as). The amount of flowers and cookies heâd showered you with. The amount of smiles and laughs heâd pulled from you. The amount of love heâd shown you, even if it wasnât real.Â
You put the lunchbox aside, needing to return the gesture at least once. Leaning over your couch, you grabbed the half-finished scarf youâd made for him. You wanted to show him, reciprocate some of the affection and love. But in your haste, you forgot the ball of yarn the scarf was connected to.
âOh, fuck.â
Like a roll of paper, it unfurled, and though it would be annoying to roll it all up again, you shoved the scarf into Jungkookâs face, uncaring.
âItâs not finished- or particularly well done. But- I made that⌠for you,â you hesitated, a lump lodged in your throat. âI also just chose a random colour- if you donât like red, I could definitely change it, you know. Itâs not even done-â
He took it from your hands, silencing you. Your brows knit together as you watched him admire the intricate and detailed rows of red yarn. And then, he wrapped it around his neck even though the scarf was still attached to the ball of yarn and the knitting needles were poking into his neck.Â
âWait, no,â you laughed, already reaching to take it off. âYou donât have to wear it or anything- Like I said, itâs not even done. I still have to-â
Jungkook took hold of your hands. Your eyes met his. He smiled at you.Â
âYouâre so cute, cabbage,â he told you, his gaze so full and soft. And you melted right then and there, your face lit up like a fire. Melted even more so when Jungkook kissed you and pressed his forehead against yours. âI love it, cabbage. Thank you so much.â
âReally?â you said it softly, delicately, anxiously.
As if it was a proper way of responding, Jungkook took your hand and placed it on his chest. You could feel it then, under your palm and fingertips, through the fabric of his sweater, his heart.Â
âReally.â
And you let yourself believe him a little.
You donât know how. It was blurry to you, all of it, but somehow, his head ended up in your lap with your fingers threading through his hair and your back pressed to the side of your bed. You both shared the batch of cookies while you finished a few more rows for the scarf before ultimately calling it, putting it to the side, promising him youâd finish it as soon as possible. Instead, a bottle of supermarket wine found its way into your hands, the glasses always filled with the red liquid. Neither of you said much. And really, there simply wasnât a need to, the minutes ticking by as the night went on and on. An intimacy lay between you, an intimacy most would never know, an intimacy that could only come from the strange nature of your relationship.Â
âWhat?â you said, almost laughing, sure you had to have misheard him.
âIâm serious. I really like it here,â Jungkook repeated. âI like your home, a lot.â
Your mouth opened and closed before you shook your head and laughed. âBut why?â
To you, there wasnât much to like about your home here. If anything there was more to dislike than like. It was too cramped, too small. The furniture was old and shabby and the lights didnât even work properly. On bad days, it would get either unbearably freezing or hot in here. And on particularly bad days where your luck had run out, the water would run cold and the electricity cut out. There wasnât much to love here, except for your big bed and pothos you had on your window sill.
âI feel like I get to see another side of you,â Jungkook told you, shrugging and wrinkling his nose. âYou seem much more relaxed at home.â
You frowned. âWhere else should I be relaxed if not at home?â
He rolled his eyes at your comment, shaking his head. âNo, I just mean⌠you donât seem on guard at home.â
âIâm on guard?â
There was a pause. He looked at you for a long time, eyes wandering across your entire face.
âYeah, sometimes.â He wrinkled his forehead a little. âI think you used to be more on guard, or at least you were around me.â There was another pause, another beat, another moment of suspense. âWouldnât you say youâve opened up to me more since you let me in here for the first time?â
The question stumped you. Because did everything really change then? You couldnât say. To a certain degree, Jungkook was right. Things had drastically shifted between him and you. Before you would have never been in this positionâon the floor together, in your home, his head in your lap and your hands combing through his hair as you shared cookies and wine. But before you would have talked about it, established rules and laws and all kinds of conditions, and gone through every possibility. Now though, the two of you had gotten awfully comfortable with just simply not.
âWhy? Because I slept with you?â you quipped, knowing already even in your slightly tipsy state that it wasnât that.
âYou know thatâs not what I mean,â he said, sighing. You wrinkled your nose and looked to the ceiling for a few moments, leaning your head back.
âShould I be on guard?â
âAround me?â Jungkook said, shaking his head. âNo, never. Iâm an honest boy.â
You laughed, even more so when you looked at him and he was grinning proudly into your face, standing by his cheesy words. âYou make me want to kick you out.â
âPlease donât,â he said, offering you puppy eyes and snuggling even closer to you. âI wouldnât know what to do if you did.â
He winced when you tugged on his hair, slightly away from you. âYouâre annoying.â
Jungkook laughed, and you went back to silence for a while.
âAre you ever going to tell me what Joon and the others said to you that made you run into the bathroom the other day?â
It was probably the alcohol, all the time you had spent together, sitting there on the cold floor. Your mind wasnât the clearest anymore, and neither was his.Â
âThey just told me how whipped you are for me. How deeply and madly youâre in love with me,â you snorted, teasingly inching closer to his face with each word before pulling away.Â
He smiled a little, clearly expecting worse. âReally? They said that?â
âI know.â You took two big sips, downing more than half of what was in the glass, not wanting to lose that fuzzy feeling in your veins. âItâs funny, right?â
You snorted, knowing exactly what he was thinkingâThat was ridiculous!Â
âBut true.â
Jungkook didnât hesitate. But he said it softly. So softly in fact you looked at him to check that you hadnât made it up. When his mouth widened into a grin, you scoffed.
âOh, shut up.â
âItâs true. I do. I am.â
It sounded so very ironic to your ears. You shook your head and scoffed. âIs that what you told Narae too?â
Her mention from your lips surprised Jungkook, his eyes growing a little wider. You were equally as taken aback. But it was true. Because you did think about it sometimes if he did and said the same things to Narae. If everything you experienced with him had been experienced before, just with someone else, someone with a perfect smile and perfect parents.Â
âYou donât know me at all, Y/N,â Jungkook mumbled, and it sounded accusatory.Â
Your heart dropped in your chest. It felt like you were shot, the hurt instant. You looked away, teeth sinking into your tongue. But he wasnât off. You didnât know Jungkook very well. Why should you though? Not like he and you were anything meaningful, like you shared anything truthful. And it was so very embarrassing, so very embarrassing that you felt hurt at all.Â
Jungkook seemed to surprise himself with his words, seemed not to mean it like that because he was scrambling the very next second, lifting up from your lap and pleading for you to look his way.Â
âNo, no, no, I-I donât mean it like that,â he said, voice a little higher than usual, reaching for your hand, squeezing. Thereâs a desperation in his voice, a panic swinging with it that he might have just ruined a perfectly fine conversation.Â
âYou just seem to,â he hesitated, âhave this very weird and funny idea of me in your head. I-I never told Narae anything like that. Youâre the first one.â
You looked at him. There was a deep crease between his brows, and he went on when you wouldnât say anything.
âYouâre the only one whoâs ever made me do these weird things, you know?â He added a chuckle, but there wasnât much humour to it at all. You tried to smile for him, feeling this conversation was taking a rather serious turn. It was in dire need of some lightness.
âI make you do weird things?â you mumbled, slightly shaking your head, looking away. âI donât think Iâm capable of that.â
âDo you really think Iâd try to bake cookies for anyone else in the middle of the night? Or walk to their home at night, not knowing if theyâre even actually home because I wanted to surprise them? Or send every Avatar video essay I come across? Do you really think Iâd want to dress up with anyone else in a coupleâs costume than you?â
You couldnât find the right response then, your lips pressing together. It was difficult for you to say whether or not you believed him. Because you didnât think you did, not genuinely at least, not deep down. You never really did with Jungkook, believe him. Because you never let yourself go there, not fully. In the back of your mind, you knew that this was ending, only started because of a stupid little meaningless bet, that your relationship whichever form it had morphed to had no real genuine basis.Â
âDo you really think Iâd tell anyone else I-â
You shoved a cookie into his mouth, silencing him. Your gaze turned sideways, it was easier to speak for you then. If you looked at Jungkook, you wouldnât be able to say anything.
âAlright, I got it, Jeon. Now, eat your cookie and shut up,â you chuckled, and your words were accompanied with a lightness, a lightness you forced out of yourself and hoped was enough to quiet Jungkook. He stared at you, eyes big, before ultimately letting out a chuckle himself when he saw you smile at him. He held onto your hand, squeezing it.Â
âIf I wasnât too lazy to reach for my phone, Iâd take a picture of you right now,â he told you with his mouth stuffed, matching your tone, keeping it light and fun. It was amazing, how both of you simply moved on. He broke off a piece and held it to your mouth. You took it from his fingertips, letting him feed you. The sugar melted on your tongue. âReally thought you had learned your lesson, you know? That you were less judgemental now.â
âShut up,â you mumbled, still chewing. He laughed when you rolled your eyes.
For a few minutes, neither of you said anything. It seemed like the moment had resolved as easily as it had come up. You took a few sips from your glass, filling it back up when you emptied it, and Jungkook shared the last bite of the cookie with you, holding the piece in front of your lips and allowing you to pull it from his fingertips. And when he kept his fingers in front of your mouth, you pressed a quick kiss to them. He smiled and took your hand into his again, fingers interlacing.Â
âYouâre so weird,â you said, the corners of your eyes creasing when you smiled.Â
Jungkook returned it, opened his mouth to retort something clever and funny, but it was like the fire died in him, as if he simply couldnât let the moment from before slide as easily as you both had hoped and tried for it to. He reached for it again, pulling it back on shore. His face changed, morphed into something else. You couldnât pinpoint his exact expression, but your stomach churned. For a second, you felt this brief need to cry.
âYouââ He hesitated, afraid to ask because he knew you didnât want him to and he shouldnât but he needed to ask. ââbelieve me, right?â
And somehow that question carried the entire weight of the earth because you suffocated underneath it in an instant. There seemed to be so much. It didnât make sense, there shouldnât be any deeper meaning behind his question. After all, he and you werenât anything! And yet, he looked at you as if you were. When you wouldnât respond, looked away instead, Jungkook let out a chuckle. But it sounded empty and dry, and you knew you had hurt him.Â
âIâm sorry.â
There was a sadness to your words, and he noticed. It was the same kind of sadness he heard colouring your words when you had told him about Jaehwa and the heartbreak that had come with him. And he knew then not to take it to heart, your inability to believe him.
âIâm sorry. I want to- Itâs just-â
There was desperation, hurt, frustration. You buried your face into your hands, eyes closing. Itâs just hard sometimes! I donât really believe anyone really, you wanted to say. But you didnât. The admission felt too much, too hard to bring over your lips, too honest. You couldnât do it.Â
Jungkook didnât say anything, and you waited for him to take all of his things and go. The front door would click shut and with that, you would have ruined it, all of it, the past few months. But it didnât happen. You didnât hear his steps moving away from you, or the front door opening. Instead, Jungkook cupped your face with both of his hands, a smile on his lips when you finally looked at him.
âItâs fine.â
And you wished it felt like that to you. Fine. But you hadnât felt quite fine for a while now. Not since your heart began filling up every time you looked at him.Â
âIs it?â
His gaze softened, melted like the first layer of snow in the early morning hours. His thumb brushed over your cheekbones, and his touch was so very warm and comforting. You closed your eyes, and he pressed his lips to yours. It did feel fine right then when he kissed you. He held you firmly and strongly, he wasnât going to let go. Even if you might not believe him and had your doubts. Your hands curled around his shirt, and you were the one to pull it off of him. Because you needed that right now, something simple.Â
âAre you sure-â
You silenced him, removing your shirt. He looked at you for another second before kissing you again. You moved up from the floor to your bed. His lips pressed to every inch of your skin, slow and delicately. Your breathing flattened, soft whimpers emerging from your throat when his hands wandered, brushed the inside of your thighs. Jungkook was everywhere, holding and gripping and squeezing and kissing. It made your chest swell, and for a second, you thought you needed a second heart. Another one to hold it all in. All the feelings brewing inside you, all of your feelings for him. It was too much to bear for your one singular heart.
He held you, stayed close. He never allowed any space between him and you, never allowed you to think heâd get up and leave. And you never let him slip away from you, not tonight, caging him in. One day he would, you were certain of it, convinced. The contract was running up with each day, but right now, he was here, closer than ever.
And in the high of it all, your breaths mixed with his, the air smelling of sweat and lust, your faces flushed and bodies sticky, there were words lying between him and you. In fact, there was so much, it felt heavy. You hoped, in vain, he would let it slide, quietly.
âY/N, I-â
Jungkook stopped when you shook your head, pleading. You knew the ending of his sentence, he had told you it many times before. And right now, the thought of hearing it, hurt you more than it ever had before.Â
âI-â
But he stopped again when you closed your eyes and pressed your lips to his in response, hands cupping his face. He hesitated at first before kissing you back, hoping youâd understand either way. That he wanted this. That he wanted you. You didnât say it, but Jungkook knew not to cross that line, not right now. As if him not saying it would prevent the inevitable heartbreak youâd be going through in just a few weeks, would change anything. As if you didnât already love him more than you could comprehend. As if loving him didnât hurt you.
â thanks for reading !! if you have any thoughts, id love to hear it!
#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook x reader#jungkook scenarios#jungkook fanfic#bts scenarios#bts angst#bts fluff#jungkook implied smut#bts x reader
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bts fanfics i personally think shakespeare would lose his job over in the 1500âs.
chapter i. ⡠chapter ii.
KEYS ON SEVERITY OF SHAKESPEAREâS STATE:
( ⎠) â poor sod is on the floor. perhaps itâs shock?
( ⏠) â heâs jealous he didnât write this himself. well, it sucks to suck, mate.
( â ) â currently handing him a tissue. give him a second.
( â ) â both him and i lost our jobs. her majesty is ruthless.
THE SHAKESPEARE SERIES.
WARNING: keep in mind, some of these authors are very strict on the rule that no minors should read their work if theyâre underage, and i will honour that. but, at the end of the day, i am not your parent. so, thereâs that. but heed my warning wisely. any smut or 18+ content is highlighted in bold.
NOTE: without further ado, this are the fanfics that i think would cause shakespeare to lose his job: the first of many essays. letâs bring the guy to his knees. metaphorically.
â
â
( â ) THE BODYGUARD â by @rmnamjoons
!! bodyguard!namjoon x reader | 62.9k !!
bodyguard au, romance, smut, fake dating, slight angst if you squint, lil bit of violence.
firstly, weâre starting off strong. i present to you, the mother of all namjoon fanfics. and sheâs a bad bitch. tbh, i feel like this fic needs a moment of silence just to relish in her glory. soak it all up. itâs essential.
this fic genuinely had me gobsmacked at how incredibly written it is. it delves into every detail and no aspect of the story is left dry. you can tell the author put their everything into creating this world you just submerge into. and it shows.
the world building is amazing, the characters are so thought out, and it feels like youâre just on this adventure with them and discovering their story as it plots out.
also, the build up to the smut? out of this world. thatâs one thing i love about this fic: it doesnât feel rushed. everything is very spaced out and takes itâs sweet time, so when you get to the chocolately nut of the ferrero rocher, itâs like gold and well earned. and you can enjoy it.
honestly, itâs been months since i read this and i think about it every day. i did do some research (for my own peace of mind) and this fic is longer than the perks of being a wallflower. and is it better? yes. sorry not sorry.
this work of art deserves to be read and loved. and i rest my case, your honour.
â
( â ) UNTIL THE LAST STAR FALLS â by @minniepetals
!! underworld lords!bts x shield!reader | 44.4k !!
reincarnation!au, poly!au, gods!au, unrequited love, minor character death, car accidents.
quick question â for science â how does one happen to lose all their memories without any sustaining any internal or external injuries? because the things i would do to read this again for the first time. and i do not use those words lightly.
this was my first ever âlongerâ written fic. and if iâm being honest, i never really liked to read them because i have the attention span of a goat. but this fic lures you in from the very start and time slips away like smoke. to say, it definitely left its mark on me.
itâs so brilliantly written and you feel connected to the characters both mind and soul. you want the best for them, you want to save them, you actually want to crawl into the pages (or screen) and fucking help them out. and that sold it to me, i think. just the sheer love for these characters.
i balled when i read the last few sentences. i didnât want it to end. i think i finished it at three in the morning and sent a voice note of me crying to my friend. tmi? well, now on my christmas list is 7 hot boys in the underworld who would risk their everything for me. and i, them.
worth every single second. trust.
â
( ⏠) WARM THIS WINTER â by @jamaisjoons
!! seokjin x reader ft. ex-boyfriend jungkook | 51.6k !!
christmas!au, vacation!au, angst, fluff, smut (18+).
one thing about solaris, is she never misses. if i could, i think iâd recommend every fanfic she ever put out, but thatâs too much effort for me when you could simply click her masterlist. so, iâll wait here for you to do that. make sure you come back though.
love. sure, there are hundreds- perhaps, thousands of fics on this app about it. so what makes this one different? well, thatâs just it. the sorrowful honesty of love. knowing when itâs over, and when itâs blooming in the midst.
iâve never been in love, but frankly, this fic really spelt it out for me. the pain, the joy, the lingering memories after everything is said and done. itâs all there. and it really settles in your heart as you near the end.
this work pulled on every single heartstring of mine, stamped on them, and then proceeded to sew anew for the future to bring its own miseries. and i enjoyed it more than i can say (or type).
give this a read if you need just that bit of spark in your life. and that bit of sadness, too.
â
( ⎠) STRIKE A CHORD â by @snackhobi
!! yoongi x reader | 15.8k !!
smut (18+), pianist!yoongi.
i donât know what it is about this fic, but i come back to it whenever it pops up in my mind during my day. iâll immediately unlock my phone and open this app, knowing iâll feel better when the last word is read. and i feel content.
the atmosphere in this fic, if i may, feels as though youâre trapped in a warm, safe bubble with hazed music in the distance and soft light spilling through the thin layer of the bubbleâ not too dark, but enough to make you feel drowsy and peaceful. perhaps thatâs why i return to it so often. i like how it makes me feel.
yoongi as an artist is already enough to make a person swoon, but as a pianist? i need a lie down. a cold towel to the head. just the whole characterisation of him in this fic needs a whole separate essay in itself, but youâll understand my point when you read it.
forever a comfort fic, i think. and forever a comfort person. double whammy. case closed.
â
( â ) THE END â by @jimlingss
!! seokjin x reader | 31k !!
fifty percent fluff, fifty percent angst, loosely inspired by to all the boys iâve loved before.
i say this with my whole chest: i have never underestimated the amount of emotions you can experience during a fanfic, until i read the endâ both literally and metaphorically. shock horror.
this fanfic takes you through the adventure of the reader learning of what her future would commence if she were to marry either one of the six members. best part? sheâs led through this rollercoaster journey by the ghost of kim seokjin.
first impression to such an offer? sign me the fuck up. i mean, what more could you ask for? however my final impression went a bit more on the lines of what the fuck just happened. very different ends of the spectrum, if you ask me.
i decided to hand both shakespeare and i a tissue after this great piece of art was finished because not only was i sobbing, he was on the floor knowing his romance play of pericles could never live up to such an incredible story.
this fic was a rollercoaster i would be delighted to get onto for another ride.
â
( â ) A UNIVERSE TO YOU â by @readyplayerhobi
!! soulmate!hoseok x reader | 41k !!
fluff, angst, smut (18+), soulmates!au.
shakespeare once said (according to google), âit is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in ourselves,â and if this fic wasnât a soulmate!au, i think i wouldâve agreed in some sorts. but as it is, in fact, a soulmate!au, iâm obliged to disagree. it was destiny i read this fic, hand on heart.
i was not expecting this fic to hit me in the feels as hard as it did. as you can tell by the other works listed in this essay of recommendations, soulmate!auâs come up a lot. and with a lot of the same plots flying around on this app, itâs hard to make one stand out. but this author definitely has a gift.
everything was so richly created it made you feel full. of wonder, of love, and of want. it made you crave it for yourself. and thatâs what i love about this fic. it just makes you feel⌠good. and with the unfortunates of life currently, itâs one to get your head stuck in for some temporary relief.
dream soulmate? heâs right here, people. just enjoy the story and all the feels that float around your body. go on.
â
( ⎠) BUNNY â by @btssmutgalore
!! jungkook x fem!reader | 46.5k !!
non-idol!au, camboy!jk, friends to lovers, smut, angst.
letâs start here: never judge a book by its cover. a quote by george eliot going all the way back to the 19th century, and one i would use to describe this series as a whole, and my first impressions towards it.
this series, although unfinished (i think), has exceeded my expectations of a good smut outlined by a good plot. the best of both worlds, if you might. i came out of this series deeply in awe of the writing and the clear imagery the author manages to create within your own mind.
additionally, bunny was the beginning for me in learning about the world of camboys and camgirls(?), but i was greatly surprised. often, people are unkind to the new and stick to what theyâre accustomed to, afraid of what the unknown might bring â me, included.
but, iâm glad i took the risk because i received three great things in return: a beautiful fanfic, knowledge of something that was foreign to me, and an author whose work i admire and shall be returning to in the future.
perhaps what iâm getting at is this could be a lesson to all. take a risk of something unknown because who knows? maybe something great will come out of it, and youâll learn something. i did.
â
( ⏠) SEOUL UNDERGROUND â by @hunniejimins (ao3)
!! namjoon x jungkook x f!reader | 300k !!
mafia!au, enemies to lovers, violence, slow burn, love triangles, mob boss!namjoon, smut, heavy angst.
itâs ironic really. i found this work by someone elseâs recommendation, and now iâm passing on the favour and recommending it to you, dear reader. itâs funny how the world works.
this work is the perfect balance of fantasy and reality and i love it. youâre hit with the beauty and clouded haze of love before being smacked back into the world at the realisation the very person youâre in love with, is a mafia mob boss and his killer mate. a real fun-sponge, i tell âya.
nevertheless, this book kept me up early morning and late evening reading. it keeps you hooked, wanting, and hungry for more.
itâs nothing less of a masterpiece.
â
( â ) CREAM AND SUGA â by @snackhobi
!! yoongi x barista f!reader | 14.8k !!
coffee shop!au, barista!au, fluff, nfsw (18+).
@snackhobi is mentioned twice on this list. though, can you blame me? itâs just a good thing shakespeare and this author donât exist in the same century. it would be absolute carnage but nobody is ready for that conversation.
this author has a talent of portraying yoongi in the most irresistible way possible. i swear, i fall in love with him all over again reading. i wish you understood.
the whole misunderstanding section made me laugh because havenât we all been there? the crushing pain and overwhelming guilt of having a crush on someone you canât have. itâs all too real, seriously. been there, done that (unfortunately).
especially having the holidays just past, this is a perfect fic for a warm evening in, while the coldness of winter storms past outside. such a cute fic. love, love, love!
â
( â ) LOST AND FOUND â by @taleasnewastime
!! seokjin x reader | 21.2k !!
strangers to lovers, fluff, angst, sfw.
everyone says they have a fanfic that changed them, whether theyâre being hyperbolic or brutally honest. and in my case, itâs a matter of both latter and former.
a couple months ago, i reached what i thought was rock bottom regarding my mental state and i took to my imagination to save me from the daily hell of my own mind. and this book was one i never really forgot about.
everything this author wrote within this fic was honest, heartfelt and very, very real. from the way you donât just go up after going through something, but fall occasionally and sometimes feel as though youâre back at square one, to the way that there definitely is hope in the dark moments, and a light at the end of the tunnel. albeit a very faint one.
it comforted me in a way and reminded me of what i thought to be lost. fruitless, even. but sometimes, itâs books like these that open our eyes to things weâve forgotten during times of turmoil: the simple goodness of life. and of people.
âif youâre going through hell, keep going.â winston churchill.
â
( ⎠) CANDYLAND â by @honeymoonjin
!! seokjin x reader ft. elf!jk | 13k !!
thriller, angst, fantasy, husband!jin, some cursing.
my mother is the biggest thriller fan. not that you needed to know that, but she is. and sheâs not ashamed of it either. sheâll let you know if sheâs reading a really good thriller in the moment. trust me, youâll know.
me? not so much. iâm more of a sappy, hopeless romance, happy ending kind-of-sod â if you havenât already guessed from this list. but thereâs a reason this fic is on the list, too.
this fic genuinely kept me on the edge of my seat- uh, bed. the secrets of what darkness lingered behind the happy exterior of this adventure trip gripped my eyes to the screen, and lord, was it worth it.
throw a bit of husband!seokjin in there too? what more could you want! and written by @honeymoonjin? what a win.
letâs just say after this fic i added a few other thrillers to my basket. and happily reported to my mum i was a changed woman. okay, iâm exaggerating, but you get my point. it was incredible.
â
( â ) LILY LUCK â by @gguksgalaxy
!! yoongi x reader | 10.7k !!
soulmates!au, angst, fluff if u squint, very slight implicit sexual content, anxiety.
although this fic may be the shortest on the list, do not underestimate its power. it is still as mighty as the othersâ perhaps, even more so.
i think the main emotion i want to hone into concerning this fanfic is compassion. it sinks into your bones and surrounds your entire being like a unwanted hug. and you canât even stop it.
the author does a good job of making you feel intense compassion for the reader â who so desperately wants to meet her soulmate. which makes the ending that much more satisfying.
this is for those whoâre lonely, need a pick up, or those whoâre hopeless romantics and believe in love belonging to fate, such as myself.
âexpectation is the root of all heartache.â william shakespeare. talking of the devil, he would definitely cry over this fic. either of bubbling emotions, or the fact he didnât write it himself. sucks really. for him, not for me.
Š marknee, 2023. all rights reserved.
#shakespeare series#bts#bts series#bts x reader#bts fic recs#fic rec#kpop#bts smut#bts imagines#bts fanfic#bts angst#bts fic#bts scenarios#jungkook#namjoon au#taehyung#seokjin fic#hoseok#jiminbts#yoongi#namjoon x reader#seokjin x reader#yoongi x reader#hoseok x reader#jimin x reader#taehyung x reader#jungkook x reader
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Shit, I just saw you had different accounts for different genres and I already requested on your main non smut(??) accountđđ Okay, okay, I have a new totally original idea. What about.. male pervert yandere enemy x gn or female reader? Like enemies to lovers but one is only in on it because of their masochistic tendencies and they just love being dominated. And please add nsfw of him jerking off, finding her sweaty (sweet) gym tshirt and it being mentioned that he has, I don't know, JERKED OFF TO THEM IN FUCKING CLASS. (The oneshot could be in classđđ)
- I'm đ anon from your main account, you don't have to complete both of the requests, either one I know would make me cum, but please I'm so desperate for cocky ass bakugo katsuki like bitch guys who are so submissive and vulnerable on the inside IM BEGGING YOU.. omg, now I'm like them, fuck.
This got me pissing my pants ngl- but aaaaa yess. This came at a perfect timing! (long story short i got sum good news from my scholarship stuff in Ateneo) Your audience with me has been approved.
(also I donât think I received your other request unfortunately uhu)
YANDERE! PERVERTED! RIVAL OC x GN! READER
tw/cw: dddne, yandere themes, male masturbation, semi-public masturbation, yunâs trauma with enrollment procedures.
MINORS/AGELESS DNI OR I WILL BLOCK YOU.
University was hell before it even started. Due to complications with your scholarship, you and your parents had to repeatedly go out to get a whole bunch of documents in searing summer heat to ensure you kept the damn thing from falling through.
It was safe to say, you werenât going to just take all that for granted.
You wanted to be the best student in the history of the institution, no â the whole country. Anything less than perfect would tarnish the effort your family has put into you.
But a certain Ricardo Peralta was making that oh so difficult for you.
Not only was he already a member of the student council and potential president for the following years, he was oh so disgustingly well-rounded and rich. You thought you were a try-hard? Well think again. Ricardo had you beat in many aspects.
But not all of them.
You are a people person by heart. Charismatic, and sociable. You knew how to mingle, how to get a person wrapped around your fingers. Ricardo may have the vantage point with connections now but in the future? It wouldnât be long before everyone will turn to you instead.
And so began your petty rivalry.
It was subtle at first. Smirking at the one who got a lower score. Congratulating the other for winning second place while having a golden medal dangling from their neck. Scoffing at their rival for having a life outside academics ( pfft imagine having good time management? The two of you can never! )
And then it steadily degenerated into full blown petty fights. Violence at times. Anything aside from murdering each-other was free rein and even then there were days you two took that sort of route. It was mostly you though. For some reason, his parents were quite fond of you and would always let you into their mansion. This gave you plenty of opportunities to drug his ass.
You didnât know it was because of a deal his parents made with yours to give him access to your room.
Ricardo studied you harder than the academics he worshipped his entire life. He knew you far longer than you did him. You were the reason he strove so much to be perfect. The only reason he wanted to be perfect was for you.
He knew your parents would never think to pay for the outrageous fees the University you (and by extension him) wanted to go to, so he made his parents start a scholarship program for gifted students (Anything to make their son happy). You were already guaranteed to get in from the beginning, and he felt bad for having made you panic from the strings he had to pull so that youâd always have the same classes/schedules.
So he let you win some of the little games you two had. In any case, nothing beats the reward of your smile. And the smug smirk youâd give him as you loomed over the desk, your chest almost resting on his face.
He shook his head, he can save those thought for after he stole another set of used underwear.
He usually came to your locker after P.E. it was when your scent wouldnât be covered by whatever you sprayed on yourself. Donât get him wrong, Ricardo was a germaphobe and a half but those cheap perfumes and deodorants you slathered all over yourself so you wouldnât smell half bad after your exercises couldnât compare to the scent of your body.
In anycase, today Ricardo got greedy. Impatient. Something his parents were sure to have reprimanded him on. But he couldnât help it. Could you really blame him? It suddenly started raining out in the field. The way the water made your shirt cling unto your clothes practically made you irresistible.
âNgh . . . [Y/N]. J-just like that . . . use me . . .â Tears formed at the corner of his eyes as he mumbled in pleasure. If you just walked a little more, perhaps leaned your head around the corner. . . god, he could imagine the disdain on your face. The utter disgust youâd show him.
It didnât help that you were slandering him just a few feet away.
âThat piece of shit, Ricardo. He totally fucking cheated.â You cursed, so unlike your usual polite tone with your fellow batch-mates and the faculty. He hears a resounding thud right after wards.
The movement around his shaft only gets faster. His grip tighter, harsher, as he imagines the way youâd abuse his cock. If he added any more force heâd probably tear himself apart. The thought of disappointing you is the one thing keeping him from harming himself.
His hand only ever stuttered due to the sound of your friendâs voice, ear piercing and grotesque as it is in contrast to yours, âAray! Nadamay pa talaga yung mukha ko-â
âShut the fuck up!â You angrily replied, this time slamming the locker behind Ricardo, making him moan stumble forward a little.
âIâll fucking kill him.â
Streams of white leave the tip of his cock, your threat shoving him off the ledge of pleasure. Your rain and sweat covered shirt now drenched with another type of liquid.
[Notes]:
Aray! Nadamay pa talaga yung mukha ko â Ouch! You really just brought my face into the fray.
#Midnight Darling đŤ#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere fic#yandere x you#yancore#tw yandere#yandere core#yandere blog#yandere concept#yandere imagine#yandere scenario#yandere idea#yandere college#sub yandere#male yandere#yandere rival#yandere oc#yandere oc x reader#yanderecore#gn reader#yandere drabble#dom reader#yandere x y/n#yandere headcannons#yandere smut#smut#yandere story
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ft. logan howlett, ororo munroe, laura kinney, wanda wilson, wade wilson, kurt wagner, jean grey, scott summers (separate) x f! reader â xmen, marvel
â°â⧠how they are when you are on your time of the monthâ1k words
contains: some smutty topics for logan & jean, periods and all the complimentary side effects obviously because itâs so generous ahahahahaaaaaaaaa
⤠author's note: oh how i hate being a woman at times, if only some strong mutants could come to life and help ease the sufferingâŚ
letâs get this out of the wayâ yes, logan howlett can smell it and is able to tell when youâre on our period. in fact, heâs even able to sniff out the difference between the blood from menstruation and the blood from injuries. heâs been⌠âaround the blockâ to put it lightly, he knows what you are going through, will be nice about it, and will use his experience to help care for you. he wonât be as sassy as he usually is even if you are a bit snappy, heâll get extra food and put aside snacks for you, and heâll give you as much or as little space as you want. also very willing to eat you out or cuddle-fuck you during it, being a little messy doesnât faze him and heâs probably done nastier. 8/10, heâll help you get through it without any complaint.
ororo munroe knows when your cycle is coming before you do, she keeps track of it and is on duty to take care of you the second you wake up with that uncomfortable feeling in your panties. sheâs already inside the bathroom attached to your room running a warm bath completely with bath bombs and flower petals, ready to carry you into the water, and to strip your bedsheets for a wash if they get stained. thereâs even a cute little wicker basket full of candies and drinks on your bedside with a stuffed animal she brought from target sitting on your bedside. it may seem excessive to some for something that happens every month, but she believes the effort is worth it if it means easing your pains. 10/10, sheâs an angel descended from heaven in your eyes.
both of your dads are pretty useless (worst! logan is less knowledgeable than his original counterpart) on the topic and althea gives you a piece of chocolate at most, so you and laura kinney need to take care of each other when shark weeks come around. so many cuddles, kisses, and movie nights while snacking because cravings are a bitch. sheâll pat you on the back and rub your shoulders, muttering little âi know, princess, i knowâ as you whine. donât even think of moving if youâre in a position like that, sheâll run around the house to get you pain relievers and a hot water bottle. 9/10, sheâs such a wonderful girlfriend.
not sure why, but i feel like you and wanda wilsonâs periods would sync a lot? anyhow, itâs a nightmare dealing with mood swings, cramps, and cravings all while taking care of babypool, so thereâs a general rule not to take anything seriously during those days because youâre both sensitive and irritable. once itâs all over though, youâre back in each otherâs arms and apologizing for anything that might have been said or done (nothing serious happened, itâs just something like âiâm sorry for saying that in an off tone and making you think i was mad at youâ). 5/10, could be a lot better but the days afterward are kinda like honeymoon bliss again.
wade wilson is the biggest shit of them all, he definitely says âand thatâs on periodâ every time he finds out, calls you his little ketchup bottle, sends you period cramp moodboards which are just poorly cropped photos of him in the deadpool suit doubled over in pain from a fightâ however, he will make you laugh so hard youâll cry and forget about the ache in your body. 2/10 in terms of helpfulness but 10/10 in terms of funny jokes and conversations.Â
youâll give poor kurt wagner a heart attack every time you whine out in pain and curl up on the couch, clutching onto your stomach and contorting about to find a comfortable position. despite the promises from yourself and everyone else that you will be fine as the aching feeling is temporary, he canât help but bite his nails from worry. the suffering of people with a uterus will never cease to shock him, they really have to bleed freely like that for a few days every month? he will not leave you alone and is going to treat your every request like an order from royalty. anything you want, you get, and no amount of assurance is going to convince him he doesnât have to do all that, so you might as well enjoy it while youâre moody and suffering.Â
jean grey is one of those people who just donât have period cramps and still glows despite it all which you are so fucking jealous of. that being said, sheâs the best person to be around when it hits. since sheâs basically the mansionâs school nurse, she always has snacks, water, pads/tampons of every variety, and pain relievers on hand with so much bounty that she never seems to run out. as your girlfriend, sheâs also willing to be a bit sneaky and write you a doctorâs note to get you out of classes regardless of if you are a teacher or a student. sheâs also down to fuck even if youâre on your period since she knows orgasms are proven to lessen the pain and sheâll also massage your tits if they are feeling tender (and because she likes your chest no matter the size). 9/10, she can be a bit busy at times but is perfect aside from that.
please hold hands with scott summers and go with him when picking out pads/tampons, he will get overwhelmed by the amount of options and panic buy one of everything. what are wings? liners? whatâs the difference between yellow and green, is it lemon or lime? he might forget that youâre more sensitive during these times and slip a comment into a conversation that would make you cry when it usually makes you laugh, but heâll remind you to stay hydrated, will go out of his way to buy you brownies from your favorite bakery, and will smother you in cuddles.Â
#đ. her works#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#ororo munroe#ororo munroe x reader#storm x reader#laura kinney#laura kinney x reader#wanda wilson#wanda wilson x reader#ladypool#ladypool x reader#kurt wagner#kurt wagner x reader#nightcrawler#nightcrawler x reader#jean grey#jean grey x reader#phoenix x reader#scott summers#scott summers x reader#cyclops x reader#x men#x men x reader#marvel#marvel x reader#deadpool and wolverine
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Any chance we could get some of bihan (possibly his brothers as well, if you feel like it) s/o who's very sensitive and not super socially aware embarrassing the shit out of him in public with mushy nicknames and mentioning embarrassing romantic moments and giving him a little kissy in public. And his partners very softhearted and he doesn't want to hurt her feelings by saying anything so he just has to endure it.
A Heart Made of Soft Ice
Yip notes: GUESS WHO FELT GUILTY AND FORCED HERSELF TO FINISH THIS EVEN THO SHE IS BEHIND ON ASSIGNMENTS ALREADY ;-;
Pairing: Bi-Han x Afab reader
Warningsâźď¸: Too sick to proofread fully, also embarrassment I guess
We all know the saying opposites attract. Have you ever tried to push two magnets together and they keep avoiding each other because they are on the same side and you get really frustratedâwhy are you crying?
Letâs cut to the chase since tears are falling now. Itâs a wonder that you work so well with Bi-Han. Ya know, the grandmaster of the Lin Kuei who wishes to be feared and canât accept his adoptive brother who has been living with him for many years. Oh yeah, a match made in purgatory.
Itâs a relationship that shocks many. A cold-blooded killer with a woman who cries during animal documentaries when the prey gets captured is not the usual pairing. Youâre delicate like porcelain while Bi-Han is an actual ice wall. He canât be nice to Tomas whenever he speaks his mind but the moment you speak about something that bothered you heâll shut his mouth and listen to what you have to say. He even puts in the effort to do other expressions instead of scowling the whole time because he doesnât want you to believe heâs mad at you. The best he can give is raising his eyebrows and opening his eyes a little, take it or leave it. He has a resting bitch face.
Many have asked you how you could be with that man. Well, itâs very simple actually. When it comes to you he tries his best to cool off. He could be mad at everyone else for the smallest reasons but the moment he looks at you he uses all his might to calm down. If he doesnât he knows he will scare you or make you think that he is mad at you for no reason. In all honesty, he canât afford to lose you. You know how hard it was to make you trust him? Itâs like befriending a raven you canât look at them even when they are eating out the palm of your hand.
But he genuinely needs you. You make him feel balanced. When heâs all cold and stern you soften him up like a candle to a glacier. Itâs not much but itâs honest work. It probably saves his ass from making rash decisions as well. Heaven knows he gets himself into too much trouble by himself.
And when heâs in those moments where heâs silent and listening to you speak as he cools off you can do whatever. Shoot, you can call him whatever you want. Possibly something likeâ
âSNOOKUMS!â
Yeah, that.
Your voice echoes through the halls and into the ears of Lin Kuei warriors. Everyone pauses, processing the word you just yelled out. Whatâd you say? Snookie? What the hell is a Snookie? Well, youâre Bi-Hanâs woman so maybe he knowsâŚprobably knowsâŚdefinitely knows.
Itâs the look in his eyes that tells everyone he knows. Wide and blank but his eyebrows are not arched in a confused manner. His arms were folded and his nails dug into his tense muscles. The dots connect with everyone and they slowly start looking at their grandmaster. Another yell emitted and grew louder as you came closer
âSNOOKUMSâOh there you are!â You replied in a cheery tone. Itâs much better than that banshee yell that radiates panic and desperation for your Snookums aka Bi-Han.
You run over to your loving boyfriend with a blanket wrapped around you because it will forever be too cold in Arctika. You hugged him tightly, not paying any mind to his bugged-out eyes. Itâs horrifying to see him that way considering he is a man who is 80% of the time narrowing his eyes and 20% staring at others with murderous intent. But this stare is all a big question of what he is supposed to do about you. You already yelled that silly nickname and now youâre hugging him like he isnât a man thatâs supposed to be feared.
Some of the clansmen had the nerve to start snickering a little, finding your display of affection to be ridiculous. Itâs even more ridiculous that Bi-Han is allowing this. But their snickering was silenced when Bi-Han slammed his foot on the ground, causing a patch of jagged ice to form and make its way to the clansmen before stopping short. He quickly covered your ears to prevent you from hearing his yell.
âGet back to training! I will not hesitate to dispose of those who are unworthy of taking the Lin Kuei seriously!â
Silence ripped through the room before everyone went back to training. Bi-Han slowly dropped his hands from your ears and you pretended like you didnât hear his outburst. Blissful ignorance is a wonderful thing. He grabbed your wrist, a little too hard for your liking, and dragged you away till you two were a good distance away from everyone else. He let go of your wrist and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down.
âWhy must you yell that-â he paused to prevent hurting your feelings by saying the nickname Snookums is stupid, âname when you could have easily kept quiet and looked around the temple.â
His words were not taken in since you were focused on rubbing your wrist. He watched as you looked up at him with wet eyes. Sadness is an understatement, despair and betrayal are the correct terms for how you were feeling. Oh gods, he could kick a kitten in the middle of a blizzard and it wouldnât even look at him like that.
You felt a ball form in your throat, making it difficult to swallow. Your nostrils flared up and a heavy huff was being produced by you. And then the whining.
âMmmmmm.â
NoâŚ
âMmmmmmmmm!â
Hold it togetherâŚ
âMmmmmmmmmmmmeh heh heh heh!â
Wha-What the fuckâCartman?
Your whines rose in volume and Bi-Han immediately reacted. He covered your mouth to muffle your sadness and tried to de-escalate the situation before your eyes went puffy from tears. Heâs nodding his head no while staring you down. From your position, you believed he was angry at you for crying. You know he could never be mad at you but he is feeling a little panicky as he tried to figure out a way to stop you from crying.
âShh, shh, stopâIâm not mad at you,â he said in his deep voice which didnât help convince you that he wasnât mad. The only way he can truly make you stop is by pulling out the big guns aka giving you a hug. He just needs to look around first to see if the coast is clear.
Bi-Han let out a low groan before wrapping his arms around you and squeezing you. Itâs like a weighted blanket was wrapped around you before an anaconda decided to come around and squeeze you till you stopped crying. He managed to calm you down and you returned the hug while still sniffling. The idea that Bi-Han was not mad at you had set in and you finally felt calm. Maybe not Bi-Han, his eyes were shifting all around trying to make sure no one walked in on him being all lovey dovey.
âCan I stay with you while you train everyone?â You asked.
Bi-Han really, really, REALLY wanted to tell you to go back into the bedroom and wait for him to return. But with that tone you asked him in and your already shaken-up emotions, it would be a disaster to tell you not to stay.
âYesâŚyou may stay, but you need to keep quiet for the sake of everyone. You must not distract anyone as they are training.â Heâs just making an excuse but you will listen to him.
âOkay!â You replied in a cheery tone.
You two stopped hugging and returned back to where everyone else was. You clung to your blanket while walking side by side with Bi-Han. Now please oh please do not show your affection for him in front of others. He loves you but he also likes it when others fear him.
ââđ¤âââĄÂ°Ëâ§đŚâ§Ë°âââđ¤ââ
WellâŚyou kept quietâŚstill doesnât mean you werenât lovey dovey in your own way.
It is pretty cute to see Bi-Han with a blanket wrapped around him while you stand in front of him, holding onto the ends of the blanket to make sure you both stay wrapped. Itâs only ruined by the fact that he is staring icy dagger at anyone who even snorts. But you donât know that. Youâre in your own happy world where itâs just you and Bi-Han. And in this happy little world, youâre reminded of all the lovely times you and him were actually alone. Times where you would be cuddling in bed as you told him the most basic things ever such as how you saw a chipmunk that day. Meanwhile, Bi-Han is hugging you from behind as his mind rages on about something that Tomas did that isnât really something to be mad about. Another happy memory came up but this time you vocalized about it.
âOh Bibi, when we go back to the bedroom can I play with your hair?â His head snapped to look at you right after you said that.
Deep breath inâŚdeep breath outâŚdeep breath inâŚdonât yell at your girlfriend breath outâŚ
Nearby you both could hear Tomas whisper to Kuai Liang, âI knew he would let her do that,â which almost sent Bi-Han into a fit. He luckily managed to keep it together while his nails dug into the palm of his hand from how hard he was clenching his fists. He nodded slightly, hoping that if he gave you a yes you wouldnât say anything else. But guess what, YA DID!
âYay! I can't wait to brush your hair and use my Cinnamoroll hair claw to put it up. You look so good with it up. Oh, what else should I put in your hair?â You let out a gasp like you just came up with the best idea ever, âWhat if I put a flower clip near your left ear? That means you can show off that youâre in a relationship with me. Iâll try to find a blue flower for you, Bibi.â
Alright, thatâs genuinely a cute image to think of. That doesnât stop Bi-Han from staring at you and questioning why he needs to use a flower to represent his relationship status. Everyone knows he is dating you, how much evidence does he need? Nobody even feels like what you said was silly. Itâs adorable how much you love Bi-Han and want to show that you two are together. Even his brothers are gushing about it.
âAwwâŚyou wish that was you with Harumi, huh?â Tomas whispered to Kuai Liang.
Kuai Liang looked at Tomas like he just lost his damn mind. Letâs just return to the sweet couple that is you and Bi-Han.
Your excitement was rudely interrupted by the sound of someone laughing. It was clearly to laugh at you, not with you. You looked over your shoulder to look at the Lin Kuei warrior who decided to laugh at you.
âWhat is with you and trying to make our grandmaster seem like a spineless weakling? Whatâs next? Are you going to put makeup on him to make him look prettier? Paint his nail?â
The more the clansman spoke, the more embarrassed you felt. You had no idea you were making your boyfriend look weak in front of his clan. That was never your intention. You always want to support Bi-Han while also getting the full experience of having a partner who allows you to do anything. You turned to look at Bi-Han again and mouthed an âIâm sorryâ to him. That knot came back once again and you felt tears form in your pretty eyes. This hurt worse than when you thought Bi-Han was mad at you. Your lip quivered and you felt that whine rise in your throat before you felt Bi-Hanâs lips on your forehead. He gave you a kiss on your forehead that was gentle but lasted for a few good seconds. He then removed the blanket from you two and rewrapped it around you. You had no idea what he was doing but oh it was a surprise for many.
Bi-Han moved in the blink of an eye. One second he was next to you and the next he was in front of the clansman who insulted you, his neck being strangled by your boyfriendâs hand. A path of ice was left behind which explained his quick movement. He then slammed the clansman hard against the ground. The sound of a bone cracking could be heard along with the thudding of the body hitting the ground. No one knew what bone just broke but the clansman sure would know. He was out in an instant. For a second, you believed Bi-Han killed a member of his clan. On closer inspection, you can see their chest rising and lowering slowly. They were luckily still alive though horribly injured.
There was silence before your boyfriend yelled, âDoes anyone else wish to question their grandmasterâs authority or my partnerâs choices?â
Everyone nodded no. A wise choice.
âGood. Now this will be the last time I tell all of you to get back to training!â Bi-Han yelled before returning to you.
No one bothered to help the other guy he had it coming. Plus, everyone is scared that if they helped him, their grandmaster would go after their throats next. Just work around him.
You wrapped your arms around Bi-Hanâs neck and squeezed him close to you, âBibi, you know you didnât have to hurt that guy. I could have handled his insults.â No, you couldnât.
âAww, but you just love me so much that you want to protect me. Youâre like a woolly mammoth. All fuzzy and possibly cuddly but a big, tough guy overall. Youâre my woolly mammoth.â
Oh gosh, not the woolly mammoth comparison. Anything but that. Heâd take a snow leopard but a woolly mammoth?
You started kissing him wherever you could, mostly on his jawline. Heâs secretly ticklish there. He was emitting his low groan the whole time but secretly he liked it. How could he not? No matter what you do, what you call him, what you talk about, he will love you at the end of the day. A real man would endure the embarrassment. Bi-Han sure is a man.
A man who goes by the nicknames of Snookums, Bibi, and now Wooly Mammoth.
And at the end of the day, you finally get to be alone with your man in the bedroom where you would play with his hair. Oh, look, a blue flower hair clip. You know where to put it.
âIs it necessary to place a flower in my hair to representâAH!â He let out a yelp as you yanked a handful of his hair close to you and put the clip in.
âAbsolutely, donât fight me on this.â
Yeah, Snookums, donât fight it.
Yap notes: YALL IM SO SORRY FOR BEING OUT! SCHOOL ISN'T BAD BUT IT ISN'T GOOD IVE HAD NO TIME TO WORK ON FICS OR EVEN PERSONAL STORIES YET. ITS WORSE BECAUSE IM WRITING THIS WHILE SICK AND JUST FINISHING MY PERIOD YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT SUCKS TO BE SICK AND HAVING MY PERIOD. IVE FELT SO GUILTY FOR DAYS I HAD TO PUT OUT SOMETHING ELSE I DIDN'T WANT YALL TO STAVE AND IT WAS REDARA'S ART THAT PUSHED ME TO FINISH SO THANKS RED MUCH LOVE. I HOPE EVERYONE IS DOING OKAY I LOVE YOU ALL THANKS YOU FOR HAVING PATIENCE. OKAY I HAVE TO GO IM LITERALLY SHAKING AS IM DEALING WITH PAIN. ADIĂS!
#mortal kombat#mk1#mortal kombat 1#mortal kombat1#mortal kombat x reader#mortal kombat x you#mk x reader#mk x you#mk fanfic#bi han x you#bi han x reader#bi han mk#bi han sub zero#bi han mortal kombat#mortal kombat bi han#bi han#sub zero x you#sub zero x reader#sub zero mk1#sub zero
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