#And fair I do need to
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tsum events really are just the best, huh
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#tsumsted wonderland#to be fair this is from mal's card story so it's more...event-adjacent#i-it still counts right#poor malleus tsum is having such a time#first it blows up the kitchen and then it almost gets spin-cycle'd to tsum-death#the poor little guy just wanted to help with the party! it was trying its BEST đ#and instead it accidentally recreated every other tuesday from my college days#i am so genuinely delighted to read two entire chapters of malleus bragging about knowing how to use household appliances#(he knows what he's doing! he READ the MANUAL)#(you know that manual has copious notes covering the margins in perfect copperplate)#and the callback to his dorm ssr story. perfect.#we all knew this was going to end in malleus punching a washing machine into smithereens#i'm disappointed that the next part is probably just going to be a fun party or whatever#and not malleus showing off how close he is to finally mastering the toaster#twst please where is my spinoff game where we have to help a dragon fae prince learn how to do household tasks#i have an indescribable need to see malleus attempt to use a vacuum#he is very enthusiastic and also very stupid and we love him for it
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So I have posted before about getting back into music. Like 2 weeks ago I decided to get a piano (an rd-88, no space for a proper full/baby grand :(), and combined with learning enough synthesis to actually mess with presets WOW it's fun. The downside, of course, is since it's been over a decade since I stopped playing I'm basically starting from 0 again.
And I can see EVERY.
SINGLE.
THING.
My piano teacher pointed out to me. She was right, my wrist posture *does* suck. I *would* benefit from spending like 15-90 minutes a day just doing exercises! I *shouldn't* be trapping my pedal foot to keep rythem!
But I digress. Just, even if stuff does suck, don't go 10+ years without doing something you enjoy? Even if you can't be consistent, fun for it's own sake is valuable
#Anesidora journal post#Don't get me wrong I'm really enjoying getting back into it#I even found some of my old piano books!#... which have notes from my teacher about things like âslow down and pay attention to the fingering!â#And fair I do need to#Anyway dubstep composition is brutal#What do you DO to create melody when the dominate sound is all controlled by automation?!
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Really fucked up that, when theyâre young, Patrick and Art are SO tactile with each other, so comfortable sharing the same space. Art lets Patrick touch him and move him and physically overwhelm him and easily acquiesces to it, if not outright enjoys it.
Then in the present, theyâve been so far out of each otherâs orbit for so long, held such animosity that when they have their moment alone in the sauna, Art physically recoils from Patrickâs close proximity! Itâs so painful to watch because even as Patrickâs goading him, itâs so obvious he wants to be able to get back into Artâs space. But Art has erected all these walls around himself, he refuses to give Patrick an inch or even admit to missing how close they used to be!
AND THEN we see Art and Tashi later and he wants her to hold him, to be gentle with him, and just TOUCH him. Like, he does miss that kind of close physical contact! He either doesnât know how to ask for it or is uncomfortable being that openly vulnerable. Worth noting that he pretty much always defers to Tashi in regard to initiating physical intimacy (with their first kiss, though he does state his desire, SHE has to be the one to make the first move). And it seems pretty obvious that Tashi herself isnât comfortable providing that intimacy, whereas Patrick actively seeks to provide it (the hug/forehead kiss after their win together in the early years, dragging the stool closer to him).
Art has tried very hard to act like he doesnât need physical affection and even though his discipline and devotion to Tashi has made him a stronger tennis player, itâs made him a hollow person, which, in turn, has kept him from becoming a GREAT tennis player.
All of this, of course, is why the ending hits so damn hard.
#challengers#challengers spoilers#art donaldson#unfortunately i have once again zeroed in on the most repressed character and made them my favorite#lol @ all the people saying heâs a manipulative snake: thatâs part of what makes him great!#i think a fair amount of that manipulation or attempts at it come from a fear of loss and being alone#if he has to lose one to keep the other heâll do it because itâs better than being left behind#hoo boy yet another character trait my fucked up faves have in common đŹ#letâs not even get into how tashi AND patrick are trying to do right by him#tashi by making it so he can retire with a career to be proud of#patrick (who was pissed on artâs behalf wrt throwing the match) by laying all his cards on the table (court)#and giving art what he needed to play a great fucking game#thereâs a whole other post to be written about how tashi and patrick handle art in similar ways#specifically that he submits to them so easily they take charge of him manipulate him the ways they want#good lord i need to see this movie again#or not might not be conducive to keeping my brain from melting out my ears lol
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modern AU seb and clora's first interaction đđ (and by modern AU i actually mean super trope-filled high school romance set in the 80's/90's LOL)
#i need to do ALL the tropes like seb doing the classic 'sneak into her bedroom window' ....and also drive in movies#instead of magic duelling they duel via competing grades LOL. and instead of being a beater seb is on the football team#theyre much more enemies/rivals to lovers in this au than usual too since bookworm vs popular jock. I PROUDLY LOVE MY CLICHES#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow x oc#hogwarts legacy fanart#sebastian sallow fanart#choccyart#clora clemons#clora when she realizes people can be athletic....AND BE SMART??? no fair. HOW COME HE GETS BOTH#u can tell my boss isnt giving me much work this month bc of all the shit i have time to draw LOOL fine by me!!!!!!!#i already have 2 other modern au pages sketched out of them directly after this scene and then them at a house party#im open to more ideas toođđ#omg i just realized if this takes place in the 80s then its flipped from being 1890 to 1980......its perfect
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âI watch movies for the plotâ
The â¨plotâ¨:
#I was made for lovinâ you babyyyy#made gifs of this scene for the girlies#youâre welcomeâ¨#god heâs so fine bruh it isnât fair#they KNEW what they were doing with this scene omg#whereâs my Colt#SAVE ME COLT SEAVERS#GO WATCH THIS MOVIE RN#colt seavers gif#colt seavers x reader#Jody Iâm stealing ur mans#fanfic#x reader#reader#fanfiction#the fall guy#colt seavers#colt seavers gifs#ryan gosling#colt seavers fanfiction#colt seavers x female!reader#colt seavers fic#colt seavers/reader#colt seavers x you#ryan gosling x reader#I need to sleep fr#the fall guy movie#the fall guy fanfiction#ryan gosling gif#ryan gosling edit
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i feel like i failed you.
#me? sobbing my eyes out about these two again? it's likelier than you think!#featuring an exercise in actually doing backgrounds and lighting for once! hooray!!#also i don't actually know what the official name of the track is yet. so let's just call it zack in sector 5 for now lol#gets the point across#ffvii#final fantasy vii#ffvii rebirth#zack fair#cloud strife#zakkura#my art <3#my music <3#phew.#this. uhh#took a while.#which is to say i started AND finished both the music and the art TODAY#do not recommend! don't be like me. take breaks lol#in my defense! i had an idea and i NEEDED to get it out of my body or else i would die. you know how it goes.#anyway uhh. enjoy!
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YALL WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THESE OH MY GOD
#THE ORANGE ONE HOLY SHIT#THESE ARE GORGEOUS#WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK#BRO THIS IS NOT FAIR I NEED THESE LIKE NOW#animator vs animation#animation vs minecraft#ava tsc#ava red#ava yellow#ava blue#ava green#ava the second coming#do I tag the mercs and chosen??#nah
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i recognize that simon and edwin meeting and parting in hell is narratively very good and provides closure for all. but imagine if simon had agreed to try and escape with edwin. and charles doesn't have time to really question it, because anybody who likes edwin is aces in his book and it's hell, they need to leave. (edwin, out of courtesy to their third companion, puts his plan to confess on hold until they've escaped.)
suddenly the edwin harem of "supernatural boys who all hate each other but are attracted to that negative rizz" gains another member, and at some point edwin is going to have to mention that simon was the boy who sacrificed him to hell.
the chaos. crystal's bitchy commentary. charles going from friendly smiling to clutching his cricket bat. niko's whispering "200k slow burn schoolboy rivals to lovers" with heart eyes. it'd be chef's kiss good. edwin fleeing to his books and praying that nobody, but especially not the cat king, finds him because there has been SO MUCH emotion already. hysterical.
#dead boy detectives#edwin's milkshake brings all the boys to the yard#and he's like 'this is incredibly inconvenient. we must be getting on with our investigations'#charles: is there a convenient sea monster around? that solves all my unwanted guest problems#jenny: nobody expects me to be a queer role model to them right?#jenny: because fuck you all if so#niko: i have so much manga that can do that for you#jenny: ... you know what? it's fine. i'll do it#jenny: first things first#jenny: do NOT treat niko's manga as a how to be gay guide#jenny: do NOT let her matchmake#jenny: and do NOT think that means it's fair game to be a bitchy old queen at her#edwin in the background: i would never! niko is a delight and a gift and i'm happy she's here#jenny: because unlike you free-loading fucks niko pays rent on time and in acceptable currency#simon: why are all the cats glaring at me?#crystal: i need popcorn for this#night nurse: [full scottish outrage] why are the lost children multiplying? i sent you to hell not a bloody football pitch
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more shuake
#shuake#akira kurusu#ren amamiya#goro akechi#p5#persona 5#p5r#catâs art#uhh considering making a sketchbook tag in the future... just bc i do post a fair amount of traditional stuff#(it would apply to previous posts too bc i need everything organized)#and SHUAKE YURI#maybe i wanted to draw homura-like braids who knows#again not sure why the joker disease is at full strength a year later. where were u when i was actually PLAYING THE GAME
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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So did any of YOU guys know that someone wrote a reverse!AU Jeeves fanfic in 1953, and Wodehouse liked it?
#honestly i donât know how you can write a parody of a series thatâs already a farcical comedy#so it was pretty big of wodehouse not to send a cease and desist#do you think mr maclaren-ross prefaced his story with a âjeeves and bertie are the property of p. g. wodehouse i own nothingâ disclaimer#like the ff.net fics of old#and wodehouse was like âaye thatâs fairâ#anyway wikipedia doesnât have a link to anywhere you can read the story but i think i need to track it down#jeeves and wooster#jeeves books#jooster#good lord jeeves
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IT WAS ERIC AFTER ALL!!!! I'm so glad we got to meet him (before Vil snaps him away with those Infinity Gauntlets) (can't wait to see what happens when we get the matching Infinity Tiara to go with them, there will be no survivors)
(sorry to be so slow/rough lately, just got a lot of stuff on the ol' brain at the moment! alas, if only I could spend all my time drawing incredibly stupid characters I mean I do but)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#tapis rouge#i know these are not my best but by god i needed to draw ~daddo venue~#he is a treat! can't wait for him to yell at us for screwing up a shoot or whatever the last-minute disaster will be#i am SO HAPPY it turned out to be about movies after all! ...i mean sort of anyway#i'll take what i can get (and i do enjoy twst trying to be all cute about snow whAHEM i mean beautiful queen) (i see you there twst)#(also to be fair it actually wasn't poisoned in historial-revisionism-twstland so i think we can trust this apple. a+ acting eric)#anyway we are still. very solidly in the 'stand around and talk about the wallpaper for three hours' part of the event.#but HEY we got to meet eric! i was not really expecting it to be him so i am VERY pleased#also god help me i did think the shopping montage as portrayed by a rhythmic where they literally SKIP down the street was hilarious#there's a lot of Choices that were made in this event and that was a good one
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War knows
Earth, now in danger after the infinite realms waged war against them, is on a time limit to reverse it. The shadows speak of a person; the only person who can change the fate of the whole planet. So the Justice League scramble to find this person, only for it to be revealed as Daniel Fenton-Wayne, the newest adoptee of Bruce Wayne.
The same person who made headlines in Gotham media for his mid-western charm, looked at them blankly and told them good luck.
#Danny's a golden retriever but jaded and neutral about the whole situation#(read: he does not give a shit)#to be fair#neither would I#âI don't have anything to give to you people anymore I'm fucking tiredâ -Danny probably#He needs a hug (and a little convincing but mostly a hug)#Before you ask#Yes it would be PD's doing#his pseudo son went through all that crap ofc he's gonna throw everything for him#Danny on the other hand#have no complaints#dp x dc#danny phantom#danny fenton#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#dpxdc#dpxdc prompts#batfam#dc x dp#dc x dp prompt
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The Amazing Devil truly knocked it out of the park with Fair in terms of love songs i mean its got everything. Domesticity, deep adoration, confessions of love when youre sure no one else can hear, a that's what she said joke, yogurt, genuinely dont think there's a more romantic song on the face of the earth
#its everything 2 me you dont understand#the 'him' in that song.... hes so me#need to have a word with joey batey and madeleine hyland abt this one fr#god. the thats what she says joke almost reduces me to tears sometimes.#how unreasonably in love i am with everything you do!!!!#i cant even pick more lines from the verses to quote like its all so. waugh.#they werent lying that devil sure can amazing#their constant ability to marry small ridiculpus mundane things with profound metaphorical epic things really shines in Fair. idk#every time i see a bad taylor swift lyric in the next few days ill just listen to some tad to cleanse my soul#my shit#the amazing devil
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Mercenaries, Cloud. That's what you an' me are gonna be.
#final fantasy vii#ffgraphics#crisis core#crisis core reunion#gamingedit#zack fair#zack#creaciones#i be having a good day and then i think about this scene and go crazy#zack planning their future ahead and reassuring him about the fact that he'd never leave him behind#only to be k1lled later... saving cloud but leaving him all alone#god i need them to talk in part 3 like genuinely let them have an actual conversation for the love of god#idc how they make it happen. idc if it doesn't make sense. just do it
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my sister texted me smthing going on at home thats making me sad but im trying not to think about it and stay whimsical. its fursona friday..... its fursona feidayyyy...
#not unexpected just like. transphobia. u know the deal#her bf came to visit and my family wont call me my name which is what he knows me by#so now she has to like explain to him that im trans....#she was trying to be respectful and let me do it if i felt the need to#but basically texted me distraught like 'im so sorry i dont know why they cant just be respectful to you its not fair'#i love my sisters i wish that none of us had to go through this anymore#her bfs chill too like he knew me as 'allies gay older brother' (#(close enough) so i dont think this will b an issue for him Or them ots just like. Man.
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