#Alec the Loch Ness Monster

[the-ultimate-squish]

[autumngravity]

Got some new friends

[lurafita]

Bermuda triangle mystical beings

How about the famed Bermuda Triangle (also known as the Devil's Triangle), is a subspace portal kinda thing where all the mystical beings that can't blend in with the mundanes are stuffed?

Because Unicorns might be able to glamour themselves to look like wild horses and the mundanes being non-the-wiser. But Pegasus (Pegasi? Pegasuses? what is the plural of pegasus?) who like to fly around have a bit more trouble with that. And what about the Loch Ness monster? You get spotted a few times, and bam, off to the other dimension it is for you. Oh well, at least the lakes are cleaner here and there are no annoying stupid ships one has to avoid. So all your favorite mystical beings could be in this extra dimension (some more dangerous than others). And maybe sometimes Magnus has to pop over there for potion ingredients. And then Alec worries because of some of the dangerous things that are there. So he comes along.

[squishmalllows]

Not a request but the Loch Ness monster squishmallow is so effervescent and has my day 10000000x times better

i agree!!! lune is so cute! my boyfriend actually bought me a clip version of her and i have her clipped on my bed right next to my pillow! seeing her little face always makes my day better!

there are a few other loch ness monster squishmallows:

here’s alec the loch ness monster

and here’s nessie!!

i think they’re all adorable but lune is my fave!

[alienabductees]

squishmallows i think invader Zim characters would like

Dib: alec the loch Ness monster

(source: im a dib fictive and my favorite out of all of our squishmallows is him)

zim: Maurice the moose

gaz: otto the reaper

gir: gwendle the pig

[celebratedaily]

April 20th - Fictional Birthdays

Bakugo Katsuki (My Hero Academia) Stu (Animal Crossing) Adrina the Caticorn (Squishmallows) Alec the Loch Ness Monster (Squishmallows) Kae Kurita (Mii Character) Bastian the Bunny (Squishmallows) Bergit the Boba Tea (Squishmallows)

[anamollyintime]

My soft stuffy area for reading and cuddling. Snorlax better not drop that F bomb or he will be sent to the corner.

Squirtle loves cuddling up with the Loch Ness Monster named Alec (born on 4.20, he was made to be my best friend).

Blåhaj is new to the crew and figuring out their place in it, but we all think they fit in perfectly.

Am I 12 or 32, I can’t remember?

[ashlie702]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: ❤️ Alec the Loch Ness Monster- Squishmallows -Size 16” NWT.

[kinkymagnus]

Remember when we were talking about Malec having tails?

I have such a weakness for shifter fics and/or other plots that give characters animalistic features.

Tails, wings, claws, tentacles.... so many possibilities, so little time.

(Did you remember to take a break and drink enough water today?)

Animalistic features that are always there, or those that come out in specific circumstances/situations. If the character either wills them into existence, or loses control over keeping them hidden.

Full or half animal shift.

And do we keep it to animals that are currently in existence, or are extinct species fair game as well? And what about fantastical beasts, like griffins and loch ness monsters and *dragons*!!!!

so fucking true. there's just so much good shit to explore.

tails: twitching or needing to be restrained, or if they're prehensile, making him control it 👀 or if it's alec, using it tease magnus 👀

wings: once again i love a good like secondary feature that twitches/gives away their emotions when they're trying to keep it together, but like also. alec wrapping wings around magnus in a warm embrace, like almost protectively??? im a slut for that shit.

claws: hot 👀on either of them, but like also the intimacy of being careful and of trusting--clawed hands near magnus's throat but he isn't scared bc alec would never hurt him... or like, magnus with claws and he's too worked up to control them so he can't touch himself and he's all desperate for alec to??????? 👀👀👀

tentacles: YOU KNOW IM A SLUT FOR TENTACLES. FUCK YES. particularly with alec having them because like. you can tease, fuck, and cuddle him at the same time. bondage but the bondage is your partner's hands all over you. affectionate and cuddly but also teasing and maddening and a little rough ;)

so true, it's good in so many ways on so many levels like. so many good options!! just plain old hot monster alec? alec who can shift into a more monstrous form and magnus being like 👀? magnus with a more monstrous form/features but alec is just like oh my god you're so beautiful.... and also So Fucking Hot wtf this is unfair? alec--a bit cheesy but i dont care--just inexplicably Having Some Sort Of Monster Dick? good for him. THEY'RE ALL SO GOOD

dragons bitch you have NO IDEA!!!! HOW MANY FUCKING DRAGON ALEC AUS I HAVE!!!!!! SO MANY!!!!!!! im actually actively not-really-writing one right now bc i think i'm extremely funny that's basically mostly crack/smut but also a lot of angst snuck in. ANYWAY not the point. i just think dragon alec spoiling magnus and decking him out in jewels and pretty things and also rawing him senseless with his Big Dragon Cock is. good

[cardiganloser]

You guys are sleeping on this

[tessalivesandbreathesbooks]

The legendary Lost Herondale,” said Magnus. “You know, I was starting to think that was a rumor Catarina made up, like the Loch Ness Monster or the Bermuda Triangle.” “Catarina made up the Bermuda Triangle?” said Alec. “Don’t be ridiculous, Alexander. That was Ragnor.

Lord of Shadows by Cassandra Clare

[the-ultimate-squish]

Please do not buy squishmallows irl unless purchased secondhand. Sources below

Squishmallow Alternatives + my current reasoning for the tournament (subject to change)

More info with sources

Official Boycott (this blog is not part of the official boycott)

[plugnuts]

hi.. for the ask game - 1, 4, 31 and 40 c:

Hi!! :D

1. Who is/are your comfort character(s)?

My all time comfort character is Red from Pokémon Adventures, but my current fixation comfort character is Tweek!! I relate to him bc of his anxiety and fears, I just want to put him in my pocket

4. Which cryptyd being do you believe in?

..Huh. This question makes me realise just how little I think ab cryptids. Tho I’d have to say Nessie! The Loch Ness Monster, I mean. I’m not sure if she counts all that much, but whenever my family and I went to the Loch I’d always carefully watch the water just in case

31. What type of music keeps you grounded?

Oh, hm. I don’t really know? Never really thought ab it before. I guess songs that I can relate to the most in a particular moment. Today had been particularly stressful for me so I skipped to some uplifting (kinda? Boy in the Bubble by Alec Benjamin and Life Starts Now by Three Days Grace don’t quite fit that category imo) songs I listened to them to help me out

40. Did you have any snacks today?

I surprisingly didn’t? I got myself out a doughnut to eat earlier but didn’t. Only things I had were lunch and dinner haha

[duncantashi]

“The legendary Lost Herondale,” said Magnus. “You know, I was starting to think that was a rumor Catarina made up, like the Loch Ness Monster or the Bermuda Triangle.”

“Catarina made up the Bermuda Triangle?” said Alec.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Alexander. That was Ragnor.”

-Lord of Shadows, Cassandra Clare

[thevolturiarejustbetter]

quotidian- alec volturixswandumbasshumanyoungersister

so the reader is 16 (Bella's younger sister) and Alec was turned at 17 but looks older because back in his day everyone was nasty and barely bathed- not to mention stress and the labor-intensive shit kids did back in the 600 A.D

WARNING: Includes a made-up heart blood disease- it's literally bullshit so if ur a med student- go away

her ability is similar to Bellas. She's also human btw and this is taken place after breaking dawn. She's a shield but with Carlisle's help she's able to control herself to be seen or not seen in memories.

So obviously she spent time with Edward- who is not immune to aro's power- so aro can still see everything Edward has ever thought of EXCEPT for the things he experienced/thought of Luna. I know it's confusing so if u got any questions here the fuck I am. So basically Aro doesn't know Luna exists because girlie is trying to hide from him, but girlie is also only human so there's a big chance of her dumb sick-ass slipping and failing.

growing up was hard

having divorced parents was hard for everyone

but being stuck with a delusional neglecting mother, who did love them a lot, but acted like a lovestruck teenager all the time instead of raising her kids was very hard

Luna and Bella Swan stuck together- and are still sticking together- through thick and thin.

the two-year age gap was irrelevant because Luna looked out for her older sister in ways a mother should.

They both knew their mother loved them but it was obvious that she was not content with her life.

And her desired dream life would be just spending the rest of her life traveling with her boyfriend who made a living by playing with a ball and a stick. without being a mom.

Although Renee had never taken out her discontent in life on her daughters and loved them very much, it was clear to Luna that her life would be more satisfactory if she wasn't a mother.

So when Luna was diagnosed with the disease that would take her life away, she had decided that it was best to give her mother what she wanted.

Because the last thing any mom- who despises motherhood- would want was not only to be stuck with two teenage girls but also with one of them being sick.

When Luna was first diagnosed she was thankful that the disease wouldn't cause her to look lethargic all the time.

Yes, she looked sick sometimes when it got really bad, but it was just paleness, purplish heavy dark circles, and colorless cheeks.

That sometimes did the job of helping her older sister forget about the fact that her younger sister- whom she very much loved- was going to be dead even before by the time she turns 18.

Bella Swan loved her sister to death, as much as she loved Edward. But she couldn't help but force the Cullens to tell her sister about the choice of being immortal and living with her for the rest of eternity.

Then they would be sisters forever and ever right?

Wrong

Luna Swan did not want to be immortal.

What the fuck would she even live for?

If her sister were to be alone then sure she would happily oblige turning into an immortal oversized mosquito. But her sister had a family.

So even if she was going to die in the next coming month or even maybe a year tops- her sister would eventually get over her death because Bella Swan had a daughter and a mate.

So while her sister was in Italy, she ran away.

and the fact that she was also a shield, both mentally and physically, meaning that unlike her sister she wouldn't show up in anyone's thoughts unless she wanted to, giving her immunity to Aro and Edward's abilities.

She was human

a very sick human with an even more limited life span

but she was more powerful than her, now, vampire sister, who had forgotten basic sex ed which was now sparking a war.

The only reason she knew of the oversized child spawn of the two most awkward people in existence, was because of Rosalie Cullen.

Rosalie and Luna secretly kept in contact since her disappearance/runaway to NYC.

Edward thankfully didn't know about their activities since Luna was trying her best to keep herself hidden from Rose's thoughts and it was working.

No one knew where she was.

She never really liked the city and preferred to live in a more secluded area but just in case of her ability ever started faltering, because she is after all only a human, she would be around people and no vampire would ever expose themselves to a dying human living in one of the most crowded populated cities on earth.

While everyone was relieved, Bella Swan was irritated.

She missed her sister.

She wanted her sister to live the rest of eternity with her.

But she knew that no matter how hard she tries, her sister would never choose an immortal life.

So when the Volturi was gone.

And hearing from Alice after the clearing, about her younger dying sister being the soulmate AND the blood singer of Alec Volturi, she was determined to go to Italy, alone, and make them aware of Luna Swan's existence.

Renesmee and the Cullens would stay in Forks, but she needed to go to Volterra.

Alec Volturi would never let his soulmate just die.

And a soulmate- no matter who they were- had the ability to give eternal happiness to her sister.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT-"

"Bells are you crazy-"

"She lost her damn mind after giving birth to the next loch ness monster-"

Bella was now confronted by a living room full of vampires in disbelief.

They had just done all this for her and her family, and she was going to go back to Italy?

The Cullens were already walking on very thin ice and one more mistake would result in an entire execution of their whole coven even including Alic and Edward.

But Carlisle and Esma understood.

Luna was also like a daughter to them and they were exhausted from worrying about her well being 24/7 ever since her disappearance

They knew the Volturi did not have a care for individual humans, but they also knew that THE soulmate of THE Alec Volturi would be treated like royalty, human or not.

The only vampire they didn't trust was jane.

If Luna let her guard down she could easily be tortured by the sadistic witch twin who would refuse to acknowledge a human.

Not to mention she wasn't used to sharing her brother.

After all, it was always like this for the past millenias since they were apart. But if there was anyone in the world to make Luna Swan switch to immortality and keep her happy

everyone in the room, whether they wanted to acknowledge it or not, knew that there was only one person who had the capability

and that was Alec Volturi

they quickly came up with a plan

Renesmee would be staying in La Push, while Bella, Edward, Alice, and Jasper would be tracking Luna down.

Carlisle and Esme were on their way to Italy, but they would meet up with the other in France so Demetri wouldn't be able to get to them before they had Luna with them.

It was a risky plan

but Bella had enough

she was not going to let her sister just die

Luna was pissed. She had come back to her apartment after a grocery store run, only to come back and find her living room full of 4 vampires.

4 vampires with a mission to convince her to become immortal.

her annoying ass sister who wouldn't just leave her alone.

Her sister was even more pissed when she found letter exchanges between her and Rosalie.

She wasn't mad at her of course, but it was clear Bella was pissed at Rosalie for not letting her know about the updates she had been getting from her younger sister.

She was Luna's older sister, not Rosalie.

She quickly shook off the feeling of hurt and jealousy as she faced her now very frustrated and furious sister- who she hadn’t seen in months

If y’all like this I’ll continue this series instead

Also doesn’t the girl below vaguely match the description of Bella swan from the books? So if Bella had a sister I feel like she would look something like the gurl below-

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Three Days of The Hunter Job

leverage 2.05

hunt for the truth = fox news

you can’t change my mind, sorry

- - - - -

Nate: Here's what we can do. We can probably get you enough money to save the house and pay for medical bills--

Sarah: We aren't interested in money, Mr. Ford. This woman took my father's self-esteem. She took his reputation. She took his good name. That's what he needs back.

someone needs to make a compilation of their clients being noble as hell

- - - - -

Sophie: I wanna take the lead on this one. I wanna do what you do.

Nate: Yeah, listen, I know breakups can be very difficult, Sophie.

Sophie: Whoa. No, that's not what this is about.

Nate: I know that you have this need to be in control right now, you know.

Sophie: I don't have any such need.

Nate: But you can't project that onto the con.

Sophie: Excuse me? This, coming from the man who spent an entire year drunk, working out his obsessive vengeance on every dimwit in a suit who happened to cross our line of vision.

Nate: Hey, you put some thought into that one, didn't you?

Sophie: You know, I'm not tryin' to control the universe just because some guy dumped me. I-I appreciate the concern. I just, I need a new challenge.

Nate: Okay. (hands Sophie the files) This is your job.

Sophie: Thanks. Now, let's go get this bitch. (walks away)

Nate: Oh, boy

fucking get rekt nate you’re the literal last one to talk

- - - - -

huh nate is wearing flannel in this one

- - - - -

Sophie: Exactly. And then to protect themselves, they issue an apology to Mr. Pennington and then they throw Monica Hunter into the jaws of the very media machine that she bent to her own malicious will.

Parker: Wow. I gotta say, Sophie's briefings are much more dramatic.

Eliot: And poetic.

parker and eliot are cute

- - - - -

Sophie: But we can sell a story that commands respect. A story that she's gonna chase to get the respect she craves. Hm? Pack your bags, everyone. We're going to D.C. to make news.

(everyone continues sitting, looking uncomfortable)

Nate: That's when you wanna...

Sophie: I wanna do that bit again. Pack your bags, everyone. We're going to D.C. to make news. (leaves room)

Nate: She's walking into the closet

SOPHIE ITS OKAY YOU DONT NEED TO GO IN THE CLOSET

- - - - -

Parker: I got the pass. Easy.

Sophie: Parker, we went over this.

[Exterior Studio]

Sophie: You're not supposed to take it. Get caught with it.

Parker: I don't know how to get caught.

Sophie: Yeah, I know it's difficult to steal badly. Just, just try

- - - - -

Monica (grabs Parker): Hey. Hey. I will have you arrested for trespassing if you do not tell me what you are doing here.

Parker: Technically, you can't have me arrested for trespassing because you don't own the station.

Sophie: Parker, tell her the story

parker: TRY ME BITCH

- - - - -

hardison doing crazy tinfoil hat guy is iconic

+ parker and hardison’s high five and “that’s what I’m talkin about!” ADORABLE

- - - - -

Parker: Eliot, these conspiracies aren't real, right?

Eliot: What do you mean?

Parker: Like that one over there that says all the major wars of the past 50 years were ordered by members of The Council.

Eliot: Parker, I'm not at liberty to discuss that with you. (walks away)

Parker: You're not a member of The Council, are you? Eliot? Is he?

Nate: Oh, I don't know. (walks away)

Parker: Huh? Uh, Nate, is he?

parker looked so vulnerable asking it and eliot’s just like,,, imma fuck with her LMFAO

also this is another chaotic ot3 scene that I’d die for

- - - - -

eliot taking the general’s id with his pencil and handing it off to hardison? SMOOTH AS FUCK

- - - - -

Parker: But what if he won't talk to us?

Monica: Then we celebrate.

Parker: Celebrate?

Monica: Denial means guilt. Refusal means more guilt. Punch out my cameraman, and I'll kiss you on the mouth.

Camera Man: Mm-hm.

parker: 👀👀👀

- - - - -

parker gets hit with a car ,,, how many times in this series does she get hit with a car ??

- - - - -

monica’s face when she sees parker get hit by a car is LITERALLY the exact same as the surprised pikachu face

+

bruh imagine you see this happening ,,, like a girl get hit by a car, a suit running out, grabbing stuff of her body, then running away ???

her playing dead on the ground for a hot minute before “waking up”, dusting herself off and walking away ???

- - - - -

Hardison: Move. Don't stop. Come on.

Monica: They ran her over.

Hardison: I know, but we gotta go. Security cameras, the ATM cameras, the traffic cameras. We're always being watched. Just put your head down. Act natural.

Monica: Why are you dressed like a mailman?

Hardison: Invisible man, mailman, nobody notices the mailman. He blends right in. Just like a circus clown.

- - - - -

Parker: We totally went to the moon.

Eliot: Movie sets. I've seen 'em. They're outside of Albuquerque.

Parker: Why would there still be sets there?

Eliot: Because they're gonna reuse 'em for the Mars mission. Repaint it all red.

her bumping shoulders with eliot and leaning on him? the casual intimacy that nourishes my S O U L

- - - - -

Sophie: She has to have corroboration from her own sources. She has to craft the narrative. Monica Hunter has to be the author of her own personal nightmare.

Nate: Do I sound that creepy when I...?

Eliot: Hell yes.

Parker: Mm-hm.

Nate: Really?

Eliot: You do

- - - - -

Sophie: The only question is whether Hardison guessed her sources right.

Hardison: G-guess? Guess?

Sophie: Well, you know.

Hardison: Woman, my name Alec Hardison. I do not guess, OK? Look, journalists, they're lazy. They always go back to the same sources. I compared Monica Hunter's stories for the last ten years and created a heuristic model based on her sources. I-I filtered by story type, priority and evidentiary chain. Look, (pulls up info on laptop) sex scandal: 87 percent chance she goes to these sources. Serial killer scare: 90 percent she contacts these sources for confirmation. Government secrets and health scare intersects: Ninety-five percent chance she goes to these sources. Look, look. Right there. She's emailing them right now. Look.

- - - - -

Hardison: Get me out of here.

Sophie: Yeah, I'm working on it.

Parker (comes out of back room pulling on jacket): I'm on it.

Sophie: No, no, no, no, no, you cannot go. You're dead. Monica Hunter sees you and the whole con is blown.

Parker: Right

PARKER WAS R E A D Y TO GO IN AFTER HIM WE LOVE A PROTECTIVE OT3

- - - - -

Hardison: Damn the con. I'm a black man caught on an Army base with a video camera. I am going to jail forever.

the realest part of the show

- - - - -

Hardison: Eliot, get me everything you can on a Lieutenant Abbot.

[Apartment]

Hardison: Just-just do what I taught you.

Eliot (typing on laptop): Now, the "http" thing comes before—

[Interrogation Room 2]

Eliot: --the "www-dot," right?

Hardison: Eliot!

[Apartment]

Eliot: Which one's the forward slash?

Sophie: Oh, come on.

[Interrogation Room 2]

Hardison: It ain't the time, Eliot. It ain't the time.

[Apartment]

Eliot: It's not fun when you're hanging out there in the wind and there's a dude behind a laptop cracking jokes, is there?

Parker: (holding a gas mask over her face before looking over it) I like it when we switch jobs. It's exciting

someone PLEASE make an eliot-being-bad-at-technology compilation I’m begging

also it’s officially canon that hardison tries teaching eliot about technology

- - - - -

Eliot: No, that's everything on this guy.

Lieutenant: Sir, I need to know why you're on this base.

Hardison: Yes. Why am I on this base?

Lieutenant: I'm asking you.

Hardison: No, I'm asking you. Why am I on this base? Why am I in this room?

Lieutenant: So I can ask you questions.

Hardison: Or maybe it's so I can ask you questions, Lieutenant Kyle Abbot, Social Security 823-24-6270?

Lieutenant: I don't know what you're up to.

Hardison: Maybe you’re not cleared to know. Two disciplinary actions? That one in Germany? Maybe you're just too much of a security risk.

(lieutenant goes to leave and Hardison slams his fist on the table)

Hardison: Did I say you could leave?

(lieutenant swallows nervously)

T H I S

S C E N E

T H O

- - - - -

[Army Base Gate]

Nate: Not gonna work.

Eliot: It's all in the salute, man.

[Apartment]

Sophie: Just work the stars and bars. Nobody wants to--

[Army Base Gate]

(a soldier moves to the side of the car and leans in, saluting Nate)

Sophie: --look a general in the eye.

Nate: Uh, good form soldier. As you were.

Soldier: Clear.

(the gate goes up and Nate pulls into the base, parking near a building. He gets out of the car and walks toward the door)

- - - - -

Nate: We hunt for the truth through many dark places. (approaches Monica menacingly) I am a patriot, Ms. Hunter. I'm sorry. (to Eliot) Earl.

(Monica takes a can of pepper spray from her purse and sprays it in Nate’s face, driving him back. She runs out the door as he groans in pain. Eliot goes to pat his back)

Eliot: Good thing Parker switched that with water.

Nate: Didn't! Didn't switch. (they both start coughing)

LMFAO

- - - - -

Monica: My friends, this is the enemy. Our water has been poisoned.

(an aide spits out a mouthful of water)

JFNSKDKEJWJNFJ

- - - - -

(Eliot is cutting vegetables while Nate opens a bottle of wine and Hardison swirls orange soda in a wine glass)

hardison is literally swirling his neon orange soda in a wine glass as eliot cooks actual food for the fam I CANNOT

- - - - -

Parker (holds up photo): Loch Ness Monster.

Hardison: Loch Ness submarine.

Parker: No!

Eliot: Scottish waters are cold and deep. It's a perfect place to test.

Parker (holds up photo): Area 51.

Eliot: True.

Hardison: False.

Eliot: That's true.

Hardison: False. She said Area 51, 51.

Eliot: I'm sorry. False. Area 52.

Hardison: Been there.

Eliot: Yep

I’m crying the ot3 was top tier chaotic this entire episode and parker was having A Time™ with all these conspiracies

someone make a compilation of these scenes overlayed with the wii music. pls.