#AND WE ARE STILL LUCKY COMPARED TO OTHERS WHO HAVE NO WATER! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fabricated-misslieness · 2 years

Text

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: sully kids x hard of hearing metkayina male reader (platonic)

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: In a search for a way to communicate with you, the family has to master Na'vi sign language. Along the way of teaching them, however, you learn more about yourself.

ᴀɴᴏɴ: can you do a male Metkayina clan reader BUT the reader is hard of hearing because of the water from swimming.

ʀᴇ𝐐: yes ~ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 6148 ~ extra ~ gn reader vers.

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: feelings of shame and embarrassment, struggling to hear and understand people (and yourself), hints of angst

ᴍᴀʏʙ'ꜱ ɴᴏᴛᴇ: we don't have resources for their exact sign language so i made some things up (since na'vi sign language isn't the same as asl) as well as iknimaya trials and traditions.

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Ever since you were a kid, you had always loved the ocean. The Metkayina clan was a tribe of the water, the ocean, so it made sense; but unlike others your age who preferred to play with each other, you enjoyed being completely surrounded by Eywa's children within the ocean.

You had no qualms with solitude, as all you needed was the sea; but eventually, it proved to be a problem.

The sea gives and the sea takes; it gave you a world to love and took your hearing.

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Tsireya introduced you to Sully's in their first lesson as one of the Metkayina who truly loved the ocean. "This is our best free diver," She put a hand on your shoulder, "(y/n). You're lucky I managed to find him."

Instead of responding in some negative way at her comment, you grin and offer a small wave.

"How so?" Lo'ak questions.

Tsireya doesn't answer outright. She giggles, "You'll see."

The chief's children and you jump into the water, demonstrating the proper way to dive in that best transitions into swimming. The Sully's, on the other hand, jump into the water as though in play.

You could see it in their eyes, their amazement. The sea was an entirely different world from the one above, it was something you loved about it.

Only the Na'vi and their animal companions mingled on the coast above. The ilu could be compared to their banshees, nothing special; and the people, though physically different, were still Na'vi.

You didn't doubt that these water creatures were unlike anything they'd seen before, and you were happy that they were astonished with the wildlife you, too, loved.

You turn back forward to swim, knowing that they'll follow. You show them the form, using your tail to help and keeping your body like a spear to be able to cut through the water.

You lead them deeper into the sea, but Ao'nung taps your shoulder. You turn to follow his finger, which points up.

The Sully's were taking a breath of air. Right, that's probably something you should teach them, but you were probably not the best teacher.

Within the water, your safe haven, you tended to forget many things, so you signed to them, keep going, forgetting they didn't know how to sign.

You keep swimming, this time checking up on them as you reach an underwater slope. They were bad swimmers, it seemed, which is an idea sort of incomprehensible to you, as every Metkayina was basically born in the ocean. They pushed off of coral and rock formations to push forward and keep up.

They don't even make it to you when they go back up for air.

What's wrong with them? Ao'nung signs.

They're bad divers. Rotxo replies. Though fingers and hands hardly conveyed emotion, you knew from Rotxo and Ao'nung's generally jokester demeanor that he was making fun of them.

Stop, they're learning. Tsireya scolds.

Whilst they talk to one another, you get distracted with something out of the corner of your eye. It was bioluminescence, hardly noticeable during the daytime, which is why it's so curious. You forget the lesson at hand and follow it.

The chief's children and Rotxo swim up to talk to the Sully's where they will actually understand each other. It is only after Tsireya promises to teach them sign language, which Neteyam ignorantly describes as "finger talk", that they notice you and their dear sister's disappearance.

The bioluminescence you had caught came from a lone hammerhead squid, which is even more peculiar because it was alone. Perhaps it was paranoid, because when it saw you, it began swimming away with determination.

You struggle to catch up with it.

It dives behind large coral, hoping to lose you, but you always catch up. Hammerhead squids found safety in numbers, so they usually didn't go so fast, which means it would tire out soon.

Knowing this, you kept up the chase. Regardless, however, it puts up a good fight.

It shoots out its ink prematurely. The black liquid disperses in the water, clouding much of the view ahead of you. Instead of swimming through it, you dive under, although you almost bump into a sharp rock. Narrowly, you avoid it, swimming up quickly once you're past the ink.

Though you move past it, its original outcome–clouding your view–succeeds. When you clear the ink, you suddenly bump into someone.

Sorry. You sign, rubbing at your forehead where you'd bumped into her, so so sorry.

The girl before you is one of the Sully's. Her eyebrows furrow, confusion in her face, but you misinterpret it as anger. Great, it's the Sully's first day in the clan and you were already giving bad impressions.

I didn't mean to bump into you.

Her eyebrows furrow further. Ultimately, although she doesn't like it, she decides to surface so that the two of you may speak. She points up and you understand.

Once you're up at the surface, she says, "I don't know what you're saying."

You had long since memorized the way one's mouth moves when they say those words, and their variations, so you explain, "I was apologizing for bumping into you."

Though the next couple words come muddled to you, you just barely catch her saying "alright" and a wave of relief washes over you. "What's your name?"

"Kiri." She gives you a polite smile.

"Nice to meet you, Kiri." You nod. "I didn't realize we'd lost you while diving. Why'd you wander off?"

"Oh, I um," She worries that you may think her a freak, so she waters it down. "I got distracted."

You chuckle, "Yeah, I get it. Happens a lot to me too. It's like a different world, isn't it?"

Her face lights up when you agree with her, "Yeah, it is." She ached to observe it again, to be surrounded by Eywa'eveng. "Do you mind if I..?" She gestures down.

You tilt your head, confused. "You what?"

"Go down again." Kiri mutters, little ashamed to say out loud that she'd rather be underwater than talk with you, but you manage to read her lips.

"Oh, of course I don't." You shake your head, "Actually, I was in the middle of finding something. Do you wanna come with?"

Though she much preferred to take the sights all in on her own and on her own time, she had to admit your offer was interesting. "Okay, sure." She nods.

Kiri follows you back underwater, and keeps swimming after you. Reminded of the other Sully's, you make sure to keep your head straight and swim at a slower pace.

As you keep swimming past large coral and columns of algae, trying to catch a glimpse of the squid you were searching for before, Kiri gets distracted by something particularly special out of the corner of her eye.

She stays in place, entranced, and almost swims for it before remembering the task at hand. However, when she turns to you, you're swimming back to her.

Txampaysye. You sign, but of course she wouldn't understand. So, you wave your hand in the water to create ripples in the current and signify the water. Then, you pass a hand from your stomach to your throat and out your mouth to signify breathing. Breathing underwater.

Somehow, she understands. Though the butterfly-like Txampaysye catches her attention, uncharacteristically of her, she gestures for you to keep going. She'll have time another day.

Just a bit of swimming later, you find the squid again. It doesn't notice you. You point at it and Kiri's head tilts with curiosity.

How could a squid be bioluminescent in the day? The sunlight's rays still reached it.

Do you want to catch it? You closed your hand, from splayed fingers into a fist very quickly, the sign for catch. It was pretty straight forward, so Kiri understood; what she didn't understand, and what she was against, was the idea.

The question was only formal. You swim forward without waiting for her answer, thinking she wanted to catch it.

You approach it as silently as possible, keeping your arms to your body and swaying up and down, using your feet like a fin. You keep your tail rigid and in place, for paddling it side to side as opposed to up and down like your legs would create unnecessary noise.

Once you are close enough, you lunge with a quick, sharp movement. It doesn't have time to react before you catch it between your fingers and palm.

Triumphantly, you turn to Kiri with your hand raised, failing to notice her growing anger. You swim towards her with enthusiasm.

Fyìp ioang. You sign.

For a moment you think you may be misinterpreting confusion as anger again, but you quickly realize you're interpreting correctly. Kiri pries your fingers apart, freeing the creature who spurts the last of its ink (only a little) and leaves.

Her eyebrows are furrowed, a look you hate, and she points up towards the surface again. You follow, embarrasment beginning to spread through your body.

"You shouldn't be taking animals against their will." She scolds, pointing an accusatory finger at you. Her anger was loud and clear in her voice, loud enough for you to hear.

"Sorry." You purse your lips and mumble so low you can't even hear it yourself, "I was only curious."

She huffs, "Your curiosity doesn't mean you can imprison them just to poke and prod."

"Yeah," You point your gaze down, "you're right."

"Just don't do it again." With that, she begins to swim away, not caring if you follow her.

With shame, you dive back into the water, in search of one of your favorite places to soothe yourself.

She was right, of course, but your curiosity was often one of your driving points. It was why you spent most of your time in the ocean, what kept you entertained underwater. On the other hand, it was also why you'd lost so much of your hearing.

☾⋆☆⋆☽

The next morning, on their way to their second lesson, the Sully's find you.

Lo'ak, after yesterday, now understands why Tsireya was lucky to find you before. He thinks they're pretty lucky today, too, as it seems you're going to head into the ocean. "(y/n)!" He calls for your attention, but you don't hear him.

You're just about to dive in, so Lo'ak hurries up to meet you. He catches you by the shoulder. "Hey."

"Hey." You greet him with a smile. "What's up?"

"You left us yesterday. Where'd you go?" He asks curiously.

"I'm sorry, what?" You ask, having not heard him entirely.

"Where'd you go?" He repeats.

Again, you don't hear him. You purse your lips, the shame of not being able to understand people creeping in. "Oh, sorry, I didn't hear you."

"Where did you go?" Lo'ak repeats for the third time, slowing down his speech.

"Look, I'm really sorry–"

Neteyam catches up, slinging an arm over Lo'ak's shoulder. "What my brother means to ask is where you went yesterday, when you were supposed to be teaching us."

"Teach you?" You tilt your head as you think. Did the Olo'eyktan assign you something? Tsireya only took the opportunity because she saw you yesterday. You can't think of anything, though. "What am I supposed to teach you?"

Lo'ak sighs, "When you were teaching us how to free dive?"

The sigh makes you purse your lips. Your stupid ears were making people frustrated again. Still, you couldn't say anything when you didn't understand them. "...what about it?"

Tsireya comes to save you, noticing the struggle between you and the Sully's. "(y/n), here," She begins, pushing Lo'ak's hand off your shoulder, "struggles to hear, if you guys haven't noticed."

She signs to you, taking advantage of the fact they don't know how to sign. Do you want them to know your story?

You shake your head, to which she nods.

"It'd be much appreciated if you guys spoke louder, spoke clearer, and moved your mouths wider." She demonstrates the way they should speak as she instructs them. "It helps him to be able to read your lips until you learn how to sign."

"So he can hear us?" Lo'ak asks.

"Barely." You respond, reminding him that you are in fact in this conversation.

Neteyam nods, rubbing a burn into his brother's scalp. "Sorry, Lo'ak needs to remember these sorts of things."

"Shut up, bro." He pushes his brother away, causing him to skid sideways a few paces.

"(y/n), you would be a great help in teaching them sign language." Tsireya turns to you, signing as she speaks.

You understand, but you purse your lips. "Today? I sort of wanted to explore..."

"Doesn't have to be today, no," She shakes her head, "today is about breathing. If you want to leave, that's perfectly alright."

She smiles at you. Oh, Eywa, you loved Tsireya. She was so kind.

You take her permission and give a wave before diving into the water.

You swim farther into the ocean, trying to wash off your embarrassment with the cool water. It burned in your cheeks, anyway.

When the Olo'eyktan and Tsahìk found out about your hearing loss, you had already reached a point where there was no way to be healed. Everyone blamed your parents, their neglect for your ears and the proper care after a swim. But in truth, you knew you were also to blame.

It had been a long time since you were a burden. The Metkayina accommodated for your hearing loss. You were lucky to be born in the clan who originated the language that didn't require hearing. You had long since come to a comfortable life because of it.

When you realize that the embarrassment won't wear off so easy, you lay down on the sea grass covered sand—or lay down as best you can. The current pushes your head and limbs up.

Your intent was to relax, but the bioluminescent squid from yesterday pops up above you. You react quickly, reaching out and trapping it in your hand again.

You. You sign, awkward because you're one-handed, You embarrassed me in front of Kiri.

You'd missed two of its tentacles in grabbing it. It crosses its arms, giving you attitude, then pointed at you instead. Somehow, you understand.

Alright, fine. You huff, It's my fault. You release the squid, but this time it lingers. You forgive me?

It waves two of its tentacles up and down as if to nod its head.

You pluck a small fish from its school and hand it over as an extra peace offering. Sorry, fyìp.

It stares blankly at your offering. Clearly, it was refusing it, because it was definitely capable of catching that fish on its own. Also, you were ignoring the lesson Kiri taught you. You release the fish, which scurries back to its school, signing sorry again.

Why do you want to hang out with me?

The tentacles at its sides raise up in a shrug.

You lost your group. You purse your lips, extending your hand so that the squid may sit on it, even if it is redundant underwater. Are you trying to find a new one?

It shrugs again, though accepts the spot you give it on your hand.

Well, I suppose we're the same in that. You and I, we're special. I'm hard of hearing, and you're bioluminescent. You laugh inwardly, Although, those are two different things.

Fyìp does a twirl in your hand. It seems pleased.

Alright, let's go. I'll show you some of my favorite places.

☾⋆☆⋆☽

After the Sully's breathing exercises, Neteyam is eager to find you. He dives into the water, both practicing his breathing and speed.

For the third time, he's lucky to find you returning to the village for dinner, this time you were fortunately not caught up in exploring the sea.

Neteyam waves his hand in greeting. You do the same, though you hadn't realized he had more to say.

(y/n). He signs.

Immediately, your eyes light up. Neteyam is delighted.

Who taught you that? You sign. Your hands are a flurry of speed, but he manages to catch the words anyway.

He recognized "you" and "taught" and the distinct lack of "I", so he can assume what you asked. Tsireya. He signs simply, for she hadn't taught him much more than that and your names.

I'll teach you too.

He recognizes "I", "teach", and "you", and understands. He nods excitedly, then points up towards the surface. You follow.

"You're learning." You grin as you surface.

"Yeah." His smile turns bashful, "I want to learn so I can talk to you better." He even exaggerates the movement of his lips so that you may read them.

"Aww, that's sweet." Though you've only known him for so long, you give him a hug. "Thank you."

"No need to thank me." He shakes his head, still holding your elbows gently even as you part from the hug, "It's just what I should do."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Oh, you skxawng! You're late, you're late, you're late!

Too caught up within the serenity that the sea brought you, you had forgotten that you were supposed to be teaching the Sully's sign language!

You swim towards the shore with much hurry. Your body was preoccupied with a mission, to get there fast, and your mind was berating you for being stuck in your head so much. Because of it, you're not exactly focusing on the world around you.

"Oof!" You grunt as you bump into a column. It was one of the ones that supported the Marui pods above.

You pull yourself up onto your elbows on the pathway between pods, spitting out the water you'd caught in your mouth when you bumped so stupidly into a column.

Your squid friend jumps up too, sticking to your leg then climbing up to your shoulder. Its sticky tentacles feel weird on your skin, but you pay it no mind. Instead, you focus on cradling the spot on your forehead where you collided.

When Fyìp lands on your shoulder, you turn to it with a huff and go back to rubbing your head. Then, once you actually notice, you double take back to it.

"You can go above the surface?"

Now, no longer muffled by the water, you can just barely catch its squeal. Huh, so it was making sound all this time.

It twirls around your shoulder as if to say yes.

You turn your head back forward, resting your chin on the pathway. "I'm so stupid–wait." The Sully's and the chief's children are having the lesson quite a few ways ahead of you. They didn't seem to notice you. "It's them."

Fyìp's eyes almost seem to light up when it sees Kiri.

"Gah, should I really be joining them now? I'm so late!" You frown, thinking it over. "I'd be so lost," You narrate your thoughts for Fyìp, "every time I think about something to teach, what if they already taught it? What even is their teaching plan? I shouldn't have gone out today. Should've stayed to talk to Tsireya."

Thanks to your awful hearing and tunnel-vision, you don't notice Fyìp yapping in your ear. Only when it slaps you on the shoulder–it was a small animal, hardly hurt–do you pay attention to it.

"What?" You whine, now rubbing your shoulder.

Fyìp points forward vigorously, pulling its tentacle forwafd and back repeatedly.

"It'll be so embarrassing."

It crosses its arms in front of itself like a no. Even though you're sure it will be, Fyìp's insistence reminds you of your promise to Neteyam. It wasn't broken just yet.

"Okay, fine."

At your affirmation, Fyìp drops back into the water. You follow suit.

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Learning a new language, later in your life, was always hard. Although, Jake Sully was the only one in his family with that experience.

"Lo'ak, why are you home early?" Jake and Neytiri rush over to him, sitting down as he does.

"Sign language is so hard." Lo'ak groans, his head down.

"Learning another language is hard," Jake affirms, putting a reassuring hand on his son's shoulder. "but it's like everything else. With practice, you'll get the hang of it."

"At first, he was terrible at Na'vi too." Neytiri grins, causing Jake to roll his eyes.

"Yes, and I became better." He gives her a pointed look, to which she only replies by baring her fangs playfully.

"Well, it's more than that." Lo'ak frowns, looking down at his hands, the very reason he was so different. "I have five fingers! Everyone else has four. Whenever there's a sign that requires fingers, everyone stares at me and Kiri. Their looks are so blank, but I can tell what they're thinking."

"So why didn't you say something?" Jake asks. "It's unlike you to not do anything."

It was a good question that left him silent as he thought. He didn't really know the answer, not as he dug through the surface of his mind. As he searched deeper, he found an answer, but he didn't really want to believe it. "It's because... Tsireya and (y/n) were there."

"And..?" Neytiri prods for him to continue.

"I don't want to disappoint them..." Lo'ak purses his lips, "or be a burden to them."

"Son," Jake places his hands on both Lo'ak's shoulders, causing him to finally look up at him. Jake wanted to be sure that Lo'ak understood the sentiment behind his words. "you're only learning. You can't disappoint them. And if they get upset at you, then that's their fault because they do not understand you and who you are."

"Next time," Neytiri speaks up, catching their attention, "make an arrangement. Find a way to work around it. Alright?"

Lo'ak nods, "Okay."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Usually, you were the one sought out within the Metkayina if they ever needed you because you were always doing something in the ocean. The sea was vast and cluttered, from seawall terrace to the shore, it was all within the realm of possibility of where you were.

But, for once, you're seeking someone out.

"Kiri!" You call, "I was looking for you."

She emerges from the ocean, ringing the water out of her hair. Too caught up in the sights and feeling Eywa in the sea, she had missed dinner. You could relate to that, so you had to make sure she was taking care of herself.

"What is it?" Kiri asks, treading carefully on her words.

"I saved you some dinner." You hand her a leaf dish of fish.

"Oh." Only once she sees the food does she remember her growling stomach and hunger. "Thank you." She takes the leaf from you gingerly but begins to scarf it down once it's in her own hands.

"It's no problem." You begin, "Sometimes I accidentally skip dinner too. I know the feeling of great hunger in the morning."

Kiri nods in understanding.

"Make sure to get the water out of your ears." You enthusiastically demonstrate by tipping your head to the side and tapping the side of it. "You don't want to end up like me."

Kiri almost chokes on her food. She coughs and puts it on the sand temporarily. "Like you?"

"You know," She doesn't know how you can retain a smile like this. "bad hearing and all."

Ever since you'd lost the majority of your hearing, the adults started using you as an example of what not to do. Not only did they advice the young ones while using your example, they also advised your peers. At first, it was embarrassing, but you began to understand why you were an example and had long since grown used to the embarrassment it brought.

"(y/n), are you using yourself as an example?"

"What?" You tease, "Wanna end up like me?"

"No, (y/n), that's not what I mean." She takes both your hands in hers. "You shouldn't be using yourself as an example of what happens if you don't take care of yourself."

"Why not?" It was pretty normal to you now. You purse your lips, "Everyone uses me as an example. I am what happens if you don't–"

"Because," Kiri breathes out in disbelief, "you're more than an example. You're your own person. You're more than your past mistakes."

"You're right," You snicker at the thought, "just like last time."

"I'm just saying what has to be said." She reassures, rubbing her thumbs over the back of your hands, "Value yourself more."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

The trend of you seeking other people out, when it'd always been the opposite before, followed along for Lo'ak.

After your sign language lessons, you retreated into the ocean to clear your thoughts. Now that you had what you were looking for, you had to find Lo'ak, which thankfully doesn't take long.

"Lo'ak!" You call as your eyes find him.

He himself seemed to be searching for you too, so when he sees you, his eyes brighten. He covers the ground between you two quickly. "Hey, I was just looking for you."

"Me too. Do you wanna go first?"

He nods, "I found out a way we can work around my fingers."

"Your fingers?" You tilt your head forward.

"Yeah." He shows them off, wiggling all five for you.

"What about them?"

"Oh," He realizes the question wasn't because you'd somehow forgotten how many he had, but because you hadn't heard the rest of his sentence. He speaks with his mouth wider for you, "I found a way to work around them."

"That's what I was trying to find you for, actually." You snicker, "I found a way to work with them."

"With them?" He hadn't thought it possible.

"Yep." You grin, "Oh, but you were going first. Go on."

"Right, um," Lo'ak lifts one of his hands with the other, up to your view, then he pulls his last finger down. "I was thinking we could tie down my pinkie."

"Your pinkie?"

"My last finger, the smallest, it's called the pinkie."

"Okay, right." You nod.

"Tie it down with like a, um," He snaps his fingers while he thinks. "rope or something until I learn to stop using it."

After hearing his thought, you burst out laughing. It leaves Lo'ak confused. He stands there awkwardly, arms falling down to his sides with a building shame because he can't understand what you were laughing at.

"Sorry, um," You shake your head to wipe the laughter from your face, "that's too cruel, Lo'ak."

"Cruel?" He asks, eyebrows furrowed.

"Yeah, don't you think? It's just like what your sister taught me. We shouldn't take things against their will." You hold his hand to bring it back between the two of you and press his pinkie down against his palm. The force you put on his knuckle and the position is rather uncomfortable for Lo'ak, and it shows in his face. "See?"

"Yeah, you're right." He mutters, then realizes his mistake. "Sorry, I mean, you're right." He enunciates louder and clearer. "Just that... I couldn't really find any other way."

"Well, I was thinking we could just use your middle fingers as a unit." You bring his pinkie back up and press your fingers on his middle fingers, "What do you call them?"

"This is the middle finger," He wiggles it and specifically avoids accidentally showing it off to you, even if you probably don't know what it means. "and this is the ring finger."

"Okay." You nod, understanding quickly. Then, you press your fingers against the ring's left and the middle's right and hold them together. "We can consider these as my middle finger."

You hold your hand up next to his, pulling your other fingers down to show him the middle. He almost laughs and tells you the meaning, but decides it's funnier if you don't know.

"Say, "happen" for example." You use his hand as if it were your own, as yours was holding it, and press the side of yourd against it. Then, you bring it to the side quickly whilst pushing your fingers wide apart. "To mimic my middle finger, you can use your middle and ring fingers together."

"But... wouldn't it be confusing?" Lo'ak argues, looking up into your eyes.

You turn away from him, biting your lip, "Much the same as you're... accommodating for me by learning sign language, we must accommodate for you too. It's only right."

"Accommodate..." He hated that word, and clearly, you were just as ashamed to use it. It had been used all throughout your lives because of your particularities. "Let's not say that."

You turn back up to him, a glimmer of hope within your eyes. "What do you mean?"

"Let's not say we're accommodating for our differences." He turns his hand, the one that rested upon your palm, and uses it to hold yours reassuringly. "Let's just say that we're doing this for each other."

He loves the way your face lights up with a smile. "That sounds good."

☾⋆☆⋆☽

Thanks to Tsireya's efforts, the Sully's had learned the ways of the Metkayina.

They were still different, they were Omatikaya, and they and the Metkayina would always have their differences. However, despite their leaner bodies, they could catch up with you in the water; despite other physical differences like smaller lungs, they could stay underwater almost as long as you. They still preferred bow and arrow over spear and ikran over ilu.

Soon enough, they were good enough at free diving that they were allowed to perform their first Iknimaya trial, catching a small shell thrown into the sea.

Of course, it was the first because it was the easiest, the Metkayina completed it when they were young; but still, it called for a celebration.

Ronal denied a coming of age celebration. It was past the season for it, the tulkuns weren't home yet, and the Metkayina didn't know the Sully's enough for it to have any real sentiment.

It didn't matter to you, though. All they really wanted was a celebration with friends (which Ao'nung so gladly volunteered to not participate in).

You brought them into the sea for the celebration. For once, it wasn't a test of their breathing, speed, or swimming form. It was just exploring, enjoying the water; and they hadn't done that since they tamed their ilu.

As you dove into the sea, Fyìp swam to be near you. It seemed unbothered by the stares of awe he received.

Kiri grinned, signing to you, Fyìp ioang?

Yeah! Call him Fyìp now. You offer it a spot on your palm, which it accepts. You thrust your hand forward to show them all. He warmed up to me, forgave me.

Forgave you? Lo'ak signed. After your arrangement, he'd really gotten good at sign language.

Though the celebration was not meant to be a test, it was a great demonstration of how they were on their way to master sign language.

I believe I told you about the lesson Kiri taught me. I caught Fyìp to show it off to her, and she taught me I shouldn't have done so, even through all my curiosity. You nod at the thought, Wise words.

Kiri tucks a hair behind her ear, It just made sense to me. Not something wise or anything.

Sure. You huff out a laugh, then turn around to swim further in. Fyìp clings onto your shoulder.

The sights were already amazing. The Sully's were no longer limited by depth or obstacles now that they knew the way of water, so now they could see everything the sea had to offer.

You turn back to them again with an offer, You guys wanna see one of my favorite places? Knowing that they'll definitely agree, you turn back around and start leading the way.

It doesn't take long before you are standing before a marvel.

It was a cove of coral, fish, and many more ocean creatures. They were all colorful and eye-catching, but the main attraction was the ilu. It was similar to the Banshee Rookery in the Ayram alusìng.

We don't always tame ilu bred from other ilu at the village. Sometimes, we come here, though rarely. You explain.

These ilu were wilder, more aloof, but they still retained their friendly nature with the Na'vi. So long as you do not anger them, we can hang out with them.

The Sully's were practically let loose around the area. As you already knew much of it, you laid down on a rock at the heart of it and simply watched. Fyìp stuck around you, catching stray fish for dinner.

Kiri easily communicated with the ilu. Even if they were already friendly, they seemed even warmer with her.

Lo'ak managed to find the more playful ilu and had somehow gotten himself into a game of tag. He seemed to be one of the runners. He ducked behind coral, up and around rock arches. He was holding his own, despite the ilu naturally being much faster. Tsireya found herself watching too, and was laughing at Lo'ak's panicked face as he narrowly avoided being caught by an ilu.

As Lo'ak and Kiri both found their own things to do, it seemed Neteyam was stuck with Tuk. But she wasn't a burden to him. What kind of big brother would he be if she was?

He held her by the hand and admired some of the smaller creatures with her, although it seemed as though she had other intentions.

She escaped Neteyam's grasp and began swimming away with vigor. For a moment, Neteyam panicked, rushing after her with alarm. However, he soon relaxed once she saw she was going to you.

She waved hello adorably with a grin then signed. As the youngest, she had a bit more trouble with signing, but you understood her. Why do you like being in the water so much?

Well, it's very serene. You reply.

Neteyam caught up. He seemed interested too. Is that it?

You shrug, Sort of. There's some other reasons, but... You took in Tuk's hopeful eyes. She was far too cute to be denied. I could tell them to you.

Please? Will you? She swims closer, holding onto your wrists so that you may still sign.

Perhaps Tsireya rounded them up; otherwise, you have no idea why, as signing doesn't make sound, but they all round up around you. Even Fyìp swims closer.

It was a bit nerve-wracking, having all those eyes on you, but you had grown close to all of them. Nothing bad would come of it if you told them.

Okay.

Tuk's smile grows wider, she swims away so the others can see you too.

Ever since I was a kid, the ocean was so entrancing. It was majestic, a different world from the one above. The other kids my age, they preferred to play with one another. I preferred to explore the ocean. Even though I was hardly used to the world above, I still preferred exploring underwater.

Tsireya taught you that the sea gives and takes. While it gave me a world to love, it also took my hearing because I was negligent towards my ears. Eventually, the sea was more than just the world I loved. It was also the only place I could be normal.

Lo'ak and Kiri listen more carefully when you mention the word normal. It was something they both struggled with.

Everybody needs to sign to speak. You don't need your ears to listen to them, you only need your eyes; and my eyes, I still have. Underwater, I swim and speak and listen just like everyone else.

Tsireya swims closer, a frown on her face. She holds your elbow endearingly, You are just like everyone else.

Yeah, you are. Neteyam does the same, swimming closer. You are Na'vi.

We are Na'vi. Lo'ak signs.

Though we are all different, we are all Eywa's children. Kiri signs. It doesn't matter in what way we are different, my fingers, our blood, your hearing...

Lo'ak's eyebrows... Neteyam signs. Said eyebrows furrow at the teasing. Lo'ak retaliates by squeezing Neteyam's exposed neck, as his brother always does to him. Neteyam pushes him away.

You guys, you all understand. You smile, I'm so sorry that the Metkayina treat you differently.

Lo'ak shakes his head, If it is something we must teach them, we'll make them learn. He smiles, So long as we have great teachers like you and Tsireya to back us up, right?

You roll your eyes–he thinks it's endearing–at him but nod. We'll teach them that we're all the same.

Tomorrow will be a good day for that. Tsireya signs, Let's not forget we are celebrating your first Iknimaya trial.

Fyìp does an encouraging twirl that makes everyone smile.

To tomorrow. You sign.

1K notes · View notes

velteris · 8 months

Text

I’ve seen a fair amount of posts complaining about this arc in Frieren and… we are all entitled to our own opinions etc which is why I will be launching into a Defense of Frieren’s Exam Arc :) Keeping it manga spoiler free since it seems like most of these complaints are from anime-only viewers.

For me the main draw of this arc is the world building. We’ve spent all this time with Frieren and Fern as our main perspectives on magic. Because it’s Frieren, the magics we’ve been hearing about have mostly been a little silly and sweet. But now we’re finding out that 1) “mage” is largely still a combat designation, and 2) Frieren and Fern are actually incredibly jack-of-all-trades when it comes to their magic repertoire. The “magic is visualisation” part is starting to be really leant into and we’re seeing more humans as well who seem to specialise in one magic (steel flowers, rocks, clones, ice and water…) It’s cool!! It’s objectively cool! I love being able to see this range that we wouldn’t have had otherwise! Also it’s fucking fantastic to see how much of a BEAST Fern really is when compared to other human mages. And she doesn’t even seem that aware of it.

Coupled with that is being able to see different people’s philosophies toward magic. I think a lot of viewers are kind of down about the sudden huge influx of side characters who they don’t really care about. But these philosophies—Land’s maximum wait-and-watch, Wirbel and Ubel’s vastly different approaches to killing—keep expanding the world and highlighting Frieren and Fern’s own perspectives. It’s soooo good seeing them react to situations not of their own making and people not of their own kind.

We get to see human society that isn’t a village in the middle of nowhere! We get to see Frieren being forced to socialise! We get to see Fern away from her emotional support elf! We get to see how society has changed since the demon king was defeated! I love that Himmel and co ushered in an era of peace, which it is, and yet the world is still full of conflicts. Truly the story continues after the hero is finished.

To address a few specific complaints I’ve seen brought up:

Frieren isn’t about all these nonstop shounen fights.

Agreed! Which is why it’s cool as hell that Frieren’s main badass shounen strategy is “sit very still for 10 hours”. That aside? There actually hasn’t been much actual fighting. You could probably count up the minutes in which actual spells are being cast and it’ll be something like 2 minutes max in the latest ep20. And that’s because it’s not about who beats who, it’s about the philosophies, the worldbuilding, the ways of thinking about magic. This is not a power-measuring contest, much as Genau would like to make it. And the random lucky draw-ness of the Stilles only plays further into that. It is possible to pass this exam without coming into conflict with others, and certainly without battles to the death. It hasn’t ever been about the shounen fights.

The good part of the show was about the delicate melancholy and that’s totally missing here.

I agree that it’s one of the strong points. But the thing with the melancholy is that it only works when juxtaposed against other moments. A story that’s composed of a bunch of unlinked wistful slice-of-life episodes will eventually fall apart because it has no momentum, no driving force. And ten years to Ende is too long to go without at least some conflict. Also, again, ten-hour bird meditation session?

Anyway, there’s melancholy, but how sad it would be if there was nothing but introspection and wistfulness. Frieren is bringing the memories of Himmel forward with her into the future. That means she has to be moving forward, forging new relationships with unrelated people, going into situations that she hasn’t been in before. A Frieren stuck in the past would be against the themes of the show, of remembering and yet moving on.

Why should I care about them spending ages trying to catch a bird?

You don’t like Stille? 🐤 fweet?

Actually I care lots about this funky thing. Indestructible and goes supersonic fast. That’s fucking hilarious. Bird that simply cannot be contained. Genau is a dick for setting up this kind of exam when, Your Honour, my client Stille does not deserve to be imprisoned.

Too many irrelevant side characters who it’s hard to care about, and they’re gonna be thrown away at the end anyway.

Again, it’s the worldbuilding. And also, mild spoilers for stuff that won’t be covered in the anime, but at least one of these side characters does come back and we get more delicious main character development as a result. Though frankly many of these characters are deeply compelling and interesting to me so I don’t rly get this complaint. Give me more Lawine.

Where’s Himmel? What do these exams have to do with the hero party? Frieren is good because of the links to the past.

Frieren is good because of the links to the past, which affect how Frieren responds to the present. The whole point of Frieren is that Frieren’s life continues. And through her new experiences, she comes to understand and reconnect to the emotions she didn’t realise she felt about her past. I don’t care what Himmel would think of the mage exams, I care what Frieren thinks of them now. And the answer is that she doesn’t really give a damn but she’s in here anyway because Fern strongarmed her into it, and then she was forced to adopt two more kids along the way, and all of that is something she never would have done if she was still hermiting in the Central Lands. Somehow we are still getting Himmel flashbacks anyway? So? He’s still haunting the narrative guys. Just because Frieren isn’t saying “that’s what Hero Himmel would do” out loud in these circumstances doesn’t mean his ghost isn’t here.

Even so, Frieren clearly recognises the name Serie. Do not fear. There is going to be more about links to the past.

I miss Stark.

Fair enough. It’s okay, he’s just on vacation rn. Having an appy juice.

It’s taking too long. The arc is too slow.

It’s only been three episodes… I’ve seen people going “it’s already been three episodes!” but what? Really? Is that considered an excessive amount of time now?? Given the amount of story covered I think it’s quite reasonable? There’s still 8 episodes to go in which we cover the remaining exam stages. Have some patience like Frieren. The payoffs are being set up; they’ll resolve before the end of the mage exam arc. In the meantime, let’s enjoy theorising about the soft magic system and hollering for full auto Fern.

#frieren #sousou no frieren

171 notes · View notes

phoenixblaze1412 · 11 months

Note

Childhood friends AU with Dottore. Like comparing how he acted as a child towards the reader and how he acts towards the reader now.

Alright anon^^

Dottore = Zandik^^

During the time when both you and Zandik were children. You were the one that has to approach him first.

The other kids in your hometown didn't even like either of you. With you being interested in the wonders and changes of the world meanwhile Zandik being the one to find the wonders and make the changes happen.

In short, you two were pretty much bullied and made fun of.

So to be able to approach Zandik and befriend him would take a lot of time and patience. Like trying to tame a lion.

Zandik was always rude to you. He would give you the cold shoulder and even insult your intellect. But that didn't stop you from smiling and talking to him. Even after the various insults he tossed your way, he was still surprised to see hanging around him.

Then the night happened where Zandik got chased away by the villagers.

You immediately followed the tracks and found him hiding inside a hollow tree, all covered in scrapes and bruises.

At first, Zandik was afraid you were going to rat him out and hand him over to the people wanting him dead but was instead surprised when you sat beside him and cleaned his wounds with the bandages, cloths and water you hid in your bag.

"You're not going to take me back to the village..?"

"Why would I? I think they're the monsters if you ask me."

After patching him up with the best of your abilities, you stood up and held out your hand towards him.

"Wanna run away together? I don't want to live in a village where people would hurt someone because he views the world differently than them."

You didn't expect Zandik to cling onto your stomach and hug you tight. You could hear the soft sniffles and whimpers he let out and it made your heart break into pieces. You could only hug him back and comfort him.

You two were mere children. And children who knows they aren't accepted into something they thought they were part of would leave. That's what you and Zandik did. You both left without turning back, leaving without any regret.

For Zandik however, something changed about his view towards you.

You became his light, the one who led him out of the darkness of the cruelty of the world.

"Daydreaming again? Tsk, tsk, what am I going to do with you, love."

You flinched when Zandik, now known as Dottore, flicked your forehead with a grin.

"I wasn't daydreaming, I was just thinking back to the time when we ran away as kids."

"If you want to reminisce about our time together as children then you can take Kappa with you. He's oddly clingy towards you."

Zandik wrapped his arms around your waist, his mask hitting against your shoulder as he nuzzled into your neck.

"I don't see a problem with it. Aren't you that clingy back when we were kids? You wouldn't even let go of my hand whenever I was looking at the sleeping rishboland tigers."

You heard Zandik mutter under his breath as he trailed soft kisses down your neck and towards your collarbone.

"Yes, yes.. but I wasn't the one who turned on the ruin golem and got spun around the control room."

You let out a huff as you recalled the memory of you spinning inside the control room when you accidentally turned on the ruin golem you and Zandik found during your time at the Akademiya. Zandik had to carry you back to your shared home since you couldn't even walk properly.

"You should be lucky I'm married to you."

"Oh? And why is that?"

"I would have told Pantalone about all the embarrassing things you did when you were just a child."

"Hmph."

You were surprised when Zandik picked you up and placed you over his shoulder. You heard him mumble something under his breath before he began to walk to your shared bedroom in the palace. Curiosity getting the best of you, you turned your head to your husband and poked his cheek.

"Zandik? What are you mumbling about?"

You yelped when Zandik leaned towards your thigh and bit down on your soft flesh.

"Children this.. children that. How about I give you children so you have something to busy yourself with, darling."

"Don't be a tease, Zandik..."

"Who says I was teasing, dearest?"

You had to cover your reddened face from the other harbingers' gaze as they watched Dottore carry you to your bedroom. Meanwhile Dottore held a grin on his face as he thought about the various things he would do to make you scream his name throughout the palace.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #dottore x reader #dottore #zandik x reader #il dottore #female reader #gender neutral reader

337 notes · View notes

gretavanfleetposts · 10 months

Text

Fire in the Water: Chapter Ten - Part Two

Author's Note: I cannot believe the end is already here. The end of this chapter is very inspired by the song Better by SYML so give that a listen if you want to dive further into my brain. And thank you, thank you all for coming along on the journey with me. It has meant everything to me! And as always, thank you to @gretasmokerising and @earthlysorrows for everything Content Warnings: swearing, talk of the afterlife, death, talk of dead souls, killing (someone straight up turns to dust), penetrative sex (18+ minors do not interact) Word Count: 9.5k

It wasn't easy. You spent days sitting almost completely still in Jake's bed trying to decipher who in the room around you was there in physical form and who was a dead spirit walking. You spent your days tired as your physical form wasn't used to being, well, alive. You weren't meant for the world you were now in and it took its toll.

But even more difficult was the anger growing in your body like wildfire that would catch the moment you bound to Jake and your gifts returned. It was the reason you hadn't yet done it. You knew however much you struggled now, it would be nothing compared to that. And it scared you.

Jake was by your side every instant but without his own gifts, he was punished to sit at your side helplessly, watching the torment flare in your eyes and only ever being able to tell you who was in the corner, if anyone was there at all. It pained him being unable to put you out of your misery and you could guess that it pained him to be unable to put himself out of his misery too.

It was days that you spent wandering around his house silently, trying to remember who you had been, trying to decipher the things around you and the things inside of you. Days you spent trying to piece together memories with Jake’s help, though he couldn’t fill very many gaps for you given the stubbornness you’d lived with the first time you’d been alive. And the longer the days went on, the clearer it became to both of you, although it went unsaid: Sam was the one better suited to help you navigate the situation you now found yourself in. Sam could have given you more answers and more details of your life. Sam could have shut the voices up and cleared the room of all intruders.

The others kept their distance all the while, other than Josh. He was more than happy to recant your relationship and the months you had spent together before your meeting any of the others. His presence alone had warmed you, too, but when he left, the angry voices returned with a vengeance. You were forever connected to a world that you now didn't reside in, stuck in a world that you didn't belong to, and a bridge between the two for all things, evil and vile and sometimes, when you were lucky, benevolent, to pass through.

Endless. It was endless.

Until you overheard the twins speaking in low voices from just beyond Jake's French doors after a particularly bad day that you had spent sleeping through most of, intermittently waking with a scream as a breath that was cold and dead fanned over your face.

Endless.

“I called Sam,” you heard Josh say softly to his brother.

“What the fuck, Josh?”

Jake seemed to forget he was supposed to be quiet and his brother shushed him before explaining himself.

“He has a right to know. She has a right to see him. He was the last person she was with, Jake.”

“She isn't ready.”

“She needs him right now,” Josh answered, hushed but urgent. “We both know it. He was the one who taught her how to be a vampire. He's the one she needs now.”

“Don't you fucking say that. Please don't fucking-don't say that.”

Jake's voice cracked and you could hear the instant sigh it pulled from his twin, just as harrowed as Jake was when he let his brother see it.

“Jake, you're never going to lose me, no matter what. And no matter what happens, I will help you get through it. But you can't put this off. She is hurting and I can’t watch it go on much longer.”

“I can't do it.”

Those words chiseled away at you as did the voice that had squeaked out and said them.

“You promised me you would give her the choice. Rebecca is itching to leave. We need to do this now.”

“Josh, I-”

“I won't let you fall apart. But you have to trust me.”

You waited for one of them to speak again but a silence fell between them both for what felt like a long moment. It carried over to you as you contemplated your own feelings. You were angry with Jake over what he had done. It was undeniable and it was growing fierce inside you. But had the roles been reversed, you would have done the same thing.

Finally you watched the doors open and shut behind them both as each twin made their way over to where you sat in Jake's bed. But Jake seemed to distance himself in a way that Josh didn’t. Josh met you where you sat, standing at the end of the bed with a singular hand coming to grab the top of your foot where it rested beneath the covers. He’d formed a habit of giving you a physical cue that he was there in the flesh over the past few days you’d spent reaching for things that weren’t actually there.

Jake, on the other hand, propped himself up against the wall opposite his bed like he was afraid to get any closer. He seemed to be preparing himself for the hurt he must have suspected he would find in the conversation. And you understood that physical distance. It was an emotional wall he was already building.

But even so, Jake was the one to speak first despite the fact that his feet planted him farther away than Josh's did.

“We…we need to talk,” he began slowly.

He struggled to even say it. He struggled to even meet your eyes. And when he did speak, you could tell he was reluctant.

"Rebecca can break the tie," he whispered.

Maybe he hoped you wouldn't hear it.

You sat still for a moment before adjusting yourself and pulling your body into a more upright position, your eyes studying Jake's face all the while.

"What would happen to you?" you asked.

"It would be as if I'd never formed it. For the both of us. And our gifts would be restored."

Your eyes flickered over to Josh quickly before falling to your lap.

To break your tie. It would at least put Jake out of his misery, although you could see the damage it would do before you'd even done it. It practically sat in the room with you, like heavy, judgmental eyes casting shadows over everything.

"You would choose this?" you pressed, and Jake immediately shook his head.

"No. But it's not my choice to make; it's yours.”

His eyes sent a scalding glare toward the back of Josh's head who came to sit on the edge of the bed next to you, his hand now lying flat over yours.

"It isn't either of us that you would pick,” he said softly. “I think we all see that now.”

God, you had ached for Sam. You had tried not to dwell on it but it had become so obvious that even Jake felt it as you sat silently day after day. You burned for him. You needed him. And you were angry with yourself for all of it because the pain that wrote itself onto Jake’s features as his brother said it felt worse than the nightmare you now lived.

“How is she able to do it?”

“You died tied but unbound,” Jake answered, still not meeting your eyes. “Rebecca wasn't even sure we'd still be tied when you returned but seeing as I still don't have my gifts…”

“The tie is weaker now,” Josh continued where his brother left off. “It's vampire magic, apparently. And you're not entirely vampire anymore, are you?”

You weren't. You were even more of an abomination now and your fingers twitched with anger when you let your mind linger on it for too long.

“You keep resurrecting something that's supposed to be dead,” you whispered, keeping your eyes to your lap.

Although you hardly needed to have been staring at Jake to feel the weight of your words and what they did to him. Even Josh seemed to feel it given the way he glanced backward sympathetically at his brother before moving his eyes back to you.

He dipped his face down to try and catch your eyes. “If you bind with Jake, you'll live a happy life. Break it, and you can have whatever it is you want.” And then he sighed and pursed his lips. “We were wrong for trying to put you in a box before. No one is trying to do that now. The decision is yours and yours alone.”

He made it seem so easy when he said it that way, like it was a simple decision and all you had to do was reach out and pick a hand. The reality would be much more complicated, however, because by choosing one, you would give up the other. And if you were destined to walk the earth again, subjected to all that that now encompassed, the question was: who could you no longer live without?

"Can I speak with Jake alone please?” you asked Josh quietly.

He nodded quickly. “Yeah, absolutely. If you need me just…come find me. I'll be close.”

With a single squeeze to your hand, he left silently, pulling the doors shut with only a glance toward his brother before he was out of sight. And in his absence, you pulled yourself from Jake's bed, feet wobbling a little as you gained your balance.

Jake met your eyes silently, watching you stand and pull together what little strength you had left. And he looked just as beaten down as you felt.

“He tried to take himself after. Sam did. When you were…gone, he turned it in on himself but Cassius stopped him. I didn't understand why but maybe I do now. Cassius doesn't play short games.”

The replaying of the memory you didn't want burned into your mind ignited an anger within you, the likes of which you hadn't felt before. It came on suddenly but burned hot in your palms and in your ears.

“Why couldn't you just let me die a natural death? Why couldn't you just let me stay dead?” Your voice was quiet and calm but your fists clenched hard to reel yourself in before you unraveled.

Jake shook his head hard and swallowed, like he was mad at himself or maybe remembering someone else who had accused him of such atrocities.

“I'm selfish,” he whispered so lightly, even with your super hearing you barely hear it.

You were silent but it wasn’t your silence that put Jake on edge. It was your stillness. Your calm. It was somehow scarier to him than your anger. Much more resigned. It was like you had already chosen what it was you wanted.

“Tell me what you're feeling,” he pleaded quietly.

“I don't know,” you answered flatly.

“Don't hide from me-”

“I said I don't know!” you suddenly boomed. And when you glowered at him, he saw a darkness there that he had never seen before, a remnant of something he could never even understand.

“I feel different! I feel things for you that I don't trust! I feel like an abomination! Like-like a rag doll being jerked around by the will of others! I feel empty and I feel a hole in the middle of my chest knowing that Sam is gone and I feel so ashamed to stand here and tell you that he is the only one who makes me feel like I'm not just some grotesque product of your inability to let me go. He's the only one who makes me feel like I am something other than the consequences of your grief.”

His face sank and you could tell you had hurt him in a way that he had never really experienced before. If he'd had his gifts, he might have shielded himself from it. But this way, he had no choice but to feel it. He had no choice but to bleed out in front of you. And it gnawed at you to know that you were the cause, truthful as you had been.

“Then you should be with him. You should,” he said finally, clearing his throat to hide the way his voice threatened to break. “Because I will never be able to let you die. I will never be able to let you go willingly. Never.”

“No, you won't,” you answered meanly. “You couldn't even do it when we weren't tied.”

He shook his head, practically scoffing in frustration and incredulity.

“How could you have asked that of me?”

“It was peaceful, Jake!” you screamed back, your own voice hoarse and losing its tenacity. “I was at peace! He gave me that! And you ripped it from me so violently so that you didn't have to feel it! You feel everything and you face nothing!”

His face seemed to harden instantly.

“You're right,” he agreed, “Sam did something I never would have been able to do, not really. Not if I could have felt it.”

You said nothing but you felt the sigh as your lungs pulled it up and out of your body. It was an endless fight. He would never understand what he had done. He would never understand the things that had drawn you to Sam as you had gotten to know him. Jake had always been right out in front of you but Sam? Sam had always been at your back, practically holding you up as you went about life and navigated things that scared you, even when the thing that scared you was yourself.

“You know, I've held you dead in my arms twice now. I didn't think anything could ever hurt me like that again. But this? This somehow feels even worse.”

“That's not fair,” you whispered through clenched teeth. “I did that for you. I died for you. And I would do it a million times over if I had to.”

His eyes fell shut and he breathed deeply before opening them again to face you and the mess he had helped create.

“But you still wouldn't choose me,” was all he said.

You felt your anger turn to guilt so quickly it could have given you whiplash. And it rendered you speechless under his eyes.

“Josh was right. I have no business keeping you here, not like this. You're not mine to have,” he whispered.

You resisted the urge to turn away from him and cry. Actually, you resisted the urge to cry altogether. There was nothing to cry over. There was no reason the two of you had to torment one another any longer.

“You'll let me go?” you asked quietly, the calm returning to your voice even as your shoulders and body wanted to shake from the sudden cold you felt.

“Yes,” he answered just as calmly. “I won't condemn you to a life you don't want any more than I already have.”

It practically broke you in two and yet still, you fought the sobs that begged to wrack at your body.

The truth was, you did still love Jake. That was the trouble of it all.

He took a step forward finally, meeting you finally, and let his hands raise to grasp at your biceps.

“But I want you to know that even when it's over and the tie is broken, I'll still feel it. My body will remember it. And if you ever want to feel it again,” he sighed as you choked on a sob between his hands, “you need only ask.”

You felt the dam break as you pulled each other into a tight hug, one that didn't hide the anger you felt toward one another but one that made you realize the anger paled in comparison to the love that existed between you, despite the irreparable damage that had been done.

And there, in his hands, you fell apart just a little.

—

When you left Jake to his thoughts in the guesthouse, you found Josh outside at the treeline, staring out into the cold dark space between trees that had been growing tall for decades.

“There's someone in the greenhouse for you,” he said as you met him silently at his side.

You glanced back at the glass structure, the place you'd been carefully avoiding while fighting your own demons right under Jake's nose.

“One more loose end to tie up,” he added as he smiled softly over at you.

You didn’t need to ask. You knew who was waiting for you. And you knew you had Josh to thank for making that happen. Josh was the one who had done everything simply for you in the end. You saw that much better now. He loved you in a way you couldn’t quite comprehend and maybe never would. But what you did know was that you loved him back.

“Thank you,” you breathed out into the silence of the night air, earning a surprised look from the twin you had originally set out to start your life with before things had taken the turn that they had.

“For what?” he asked gently.

“For being you.”

He chuckled softly to himself but there was hardly any humor in it.

“I hope you don't regret letting me into your life. Genuinely.”

“Oh Josh,” you sighed with a simple shake of your head, “I could never regret loving you.”

He turned to pull you into an embrace, one you would remember for the rest of eternity, hopefully even after. At least the safety of his arms never changed. Josh was the most steadfast thing you knew. And despite everything that had happened in the time you'd known him, you knew you would do it all over again just to be with him one more time.

When you pulled away to avoid whatever breakdown would have come rather easily in his arms, he gave you that toothy grin that always soothed you.

“I'll take care of him,” he said unprompted. “I'm his twin, I've always carried a piece of his soul with me. We stitch each other back together. That's what we do.”

You gave him a gentle nod before you turned toward the greenhouse.

Jake was better off in his hands than yours anyway.

The lights in the greenhouse twinkled their usual star-like light, having been restrung so delicately around plants that had been repotted and glass that had been cleaned. It was a much more gentle reminder of how long you'd been gone.

And despite the things you had remembered him doing in the previous days, the whispers in your ears seemed to fade away when you saw him step out of the darkness and into those twinkling lights casting a golden glow on his high cheekbones and droopy brown eyes.

"Josh told me you were alive but I needed to see it for myself."

God, you had even missed his voice.

"Where have you been?" you asked him, resisting the immediate urge to run and jump into his arms.

"Traveling," was all he said.

"Traveling,” you scoffed. “I need a real answer.”

“I knew Jake was hunting down Rebecca. I was planning on ending things but Josh convinced me to wait. He had hope. I decided it was better that I kept my distance in the meantime.”

He took a step closer and you could see he looked just as desolate as the twins did. Just as tired as Jake did. Maybe moreso.

“I can hear what he's done to you,” he whispered. “I can hear the things that haunt you. Even if you don’t want me around anymore, I can help you. Only if you want.”

Fuck, he made it so hard. You deserved your answers, of course. You deserved to know why he had done what he had. But goddamnit, you wanted to beg him to touch you, to reach into your mind and hold things together the way you never seemed to be able to.

But instead of letting yourself long for him too desperately, you took your moment to question him instead, while you had him there. And you tried to remember your anger.

“You sold out your own brother. How could you have done that?"

"I had made a deal with Cassius. I was so careful. I was listening to him every step of the way. Every thought until just before you…”

You only stared at him as he trailed off into silence, studying you. It was the first time he'd seen you alive in longer than Jake had and it felt so unfair that they had kept him from you even for that long. You were both thinking it. You didn’t have to be a mind reader to see that.

“I never even heard it,” he started again when he finally snapped out of the trance your eyes had put him in. “I was so certain of it. Over and over, he just kept thinking it. He would see it through to the end. I thought that meant he would…” He shook his head as he recalled it. “I thought it meant he would keep our deal. I thought I-”

“What deal did you make?” you interrupted him.

“I'm the threat. I'm the one he fears the most. Or at least I was. I told him he could kill me once and for all if he let you live. I told him I'd go without a fight if he let Jake's poor judgment slide just one more time.”

“But you went there to betray him."

He shook his head like you didn’t see what was written so plainly in front of you as he took a single step forward.

"That day in the greenhouse when you said Josh would never deserve a monster like you? I realized it was his fault. He did that to you. He was the one who crashed the car, he was the one that turned you, he was the one that stole you from Josh and now he's the one that's turned you into this.”

You felt a sting pierce your heart as he gestured to you, the abomination that you now were that, truthfully, you didn’t want him to see.

“You were always proud of what I was,” you whispered, avoiding the sudden urge to cover yourself with your arms and hide from him.

“But you weren’t,” he argued back as he took another step. “I spent so long trying to convince you that there was nothing wrong with you but you never really believed it. It never did any good that I thought you were perfect because you never saw it yourself.”

He took yet another step toward you until he was only a foot away from you, and the proximity grew hard to ignore. Your bodies had practically become like magnets and the time you’d spent apart only served to strengthen those magnets.

“I have let myself become miserable because of the choices other people made,” he said with a pointed look that was as deadly serious as it was genuine. “Seeing you hate yourself? Hearing the way you’ve hated yourself? I was angry. So much self-torture on my part, so much wallowing in my own misery, but that day in the greenhouse, I stopped feeling so selfish for once. That day I stopped bleeding for myself and I bled for you."

This time you didn't make any attempt to hide your emotions as they wrote themselves plainly across your face in the form of tears, monstrous and ocean-like as they rolled down your cheeks and set a quiver in your chin.

"You always deserved a choice. You deserved to choose the type of person you wanted to be and you deserved to choose who to spend your life with. That is why I turned him in. He stole your decisions from you like it was nothing. I told Cassius he could have me in exchange for you. I told him I would get Jake to agree to stay on the council for a century. He agreed. I thought…I thought he agreed. He said he would see it to the end, our deal-”

“That's not what he meant,” you interjected. It had finally clicked for you. Cassius didn't play short games. And one day you’d probably learn what it was exactly he would want in return but you could hardly find any urge to care inside of you now. “It's the one I now have in my pocket that sees your soul as it truly is. That's what he said to me.”

You watched confusion flash across his face and it was your turn to shake your head furiously at the things he didn’t see that were laid so plainly before him.

“You think I would have just let you die for me?” you implored.

“You never even would have noticed. Your life with Jake would have continued after he did his time-”

“I don't have a life without you, Sam!” you bellowed finally, arms thrown out to your sides in exasperation that he still couldn't see it: that you had chosen him. “Why do you think Cassius wouldn't let you kill yourself too? If he saw this happening, Sam, why do you think he didn't want me to return to find you already dead?”

When you were met with only silence, you let out a frustrated sound.

“I mean, for fuck’s sake, why do you think I haven’t bound myself to Jake yet?”

“You haven't bound to him yet?” Sam asked, his voice suddenly low and urgent as he reached out and let his fingers graze ever so slightly against your forearm.

“No, I haven't!” you yelled out. “I can’t bring myself to do it!”

He looked stunned as he stood there, suddenly searching for air where he previously didn't need it.

“And now that I'm…this,” you gestured to yourself meanly as hot tears bubbled stronger, “the tie is weak. Rebecca can break it.”

“Why would you let her do that?” Sam questioned, his eyes unwavering on you so as not to miss anything you might do.

It almost made you laugh.

“I would do it for you!” you practically screamed at the glassy eyed boy standing in front of you that softened your tone and your emotions almost instantly. “You said you thought we should choose who we take with us to the end. You said that.” And then you stepped closer to him, practically choking on your tears as you struggled to get the stupid words out. “I would break it for you, Sam. I would break it to take you with me. To the end.”

His eyes were watery when he nodded, as if the only thing holding him back was hearing you say it at long last.

“To the end,” he agreed.

His lips were on yours not a second later, commanding your mouth against his and devouring you the way he had wanted to for so long, the way you had wanted him to for so long. And with his hands on your body pulling you into him with abandon, his mind intertwining with yours to shut out the voices that had haunted you every waking second, you found your peace once more.

He alone was where you belonged.

You melded into him that way, amongst the glass and the plants and the twinkling lights. You even felt, with his lips warming yours and his tongue sliding into your mouth to taste you and memorize you this way, that the two of you together transcended time and space together. And in many ways, you did.

You were desperate to have him right then and there. Frantic, even. Who cared who saw? Who cared who heard? You certainly didn't when you had gone so long without him. But the moment he understood what your hands meant to do, he took them both in one grip of his own and pried his mouth away.

“No, not like this. Not while you're still tied.”

You straightened almost instantly. He was right. That wasn't how you wanted him. You wanted to be focused on him when the time finally came. No one but him.

You had waited this long. Surely you could wait a little longer.

“Then let's fix that.”

—

Rebecca stood between you and Jake with some potion-looking liquid she had mixed up in a bowl and boiled over a fire in the backyard. It seemed rather primitive and it made you wonder how exactly she had brought you back but if you had to guess by the way your surroundings and your parents had melted right in front of your eyes, it had been fire that had brought you back so violently. And if you were honest with yourself, you didn’t want the details.

The others sat around quietly, waiting and watching while you kept your eyes squarely on Rebecca. You needed her for this but it did nothing to quell the loathing you felt for her having done what she had. Sam had had to free your mind in order for this magic to work and so it had left you out in the open once more, able to see her handiwork more easily.

“It should be easy. I've already spoken the incantation over it. You both need only drink it and your tie will be severed,” Rebecca explained.

You'd been avoiding Jake's eyes but when you met them now as he was being passed a tiny glass of dark liquid, you hoped he did see the sorrow in yours that things had come to this.

You wouldn't spend your life angry with him. You didn't want to. This was the only way to ensure it. And maybe you owed each other more words. Maybe you even owed each other a kiss or a hug or just some touch to remind one another that things wouldn't always feel this bad between you. But for once, he didn't seek you and you didn't seek him. There seemed to be a silent understanding between you that there was no amount of physical reassurance and no amount of words spoken that could undo what had been done. It would only be time that could remedy the mess you two had made of one another. At least that you had plenty of.

Rebecca handed you a tiny glass of your own and you took it between your fingers, staring down at the elixir that would change the path you were on so dramatically that it didn't even feel real.

You glanced over at Sam who wore an almost expressionless look on his face until he caught sight of your eyes. He gave you the smallest of smiles, one that he contained for his brother's sake, but it was enough to urge you to turn back to Jake and put glass to lips.

You each swallowed it down in one gulp with your eyes unwavering on one another. And as the liquid slid down your throat, its effects were practically instant.

All at once, you felt something within you sever, and suddenly the guilt you had felt for leaving Jake and the pull that tugged at you, digging its heels in and begging you to go to him, it was all gone, dwindling down into nothing more than a mere spark. And left in its wake was an anger that went unmatched.

You could feel your gifts returning to you, sweeping up through your toes and electrifying you on the journey toward your fingers and finally your head. You could tell Jake was experiencing the same thing, his head thrown back as he breathed deeply and tried to adjust to an assault of noise he had gone without and perhaps forgotten how to wrangle.

You, on the other hand, relished in it. For far too long you had felt weak. For far too long you had felt out of control, jostled around at the whims of others. In fact, you were here now because of choices that had been made that were out of your hands. It angered you beyond recognition. How dare he subject you to such a life of torment? How dare he bring you back to face it all like it was nothing?

The wind rustled the trees around you, conjuring up images of the days you had spent with Sam in the forest: the times you had killed and enjoyed it, the times you had hurt him and regretted it, the times you had been blinded by a rage you could neither control nor understand. But you didn’t fear yourself now. You didn’t fear the power that now flowed once more through your veins, made all the more strong thanks to your journey through death.

With your gifts finally intact, your mind no longer clouded by Jake to the extent that it had been, and your rage finally returned to your body, you reached out to take Rebecca's hand. You could feel all of the beings she had tormented before you. You could see them all as they clung angrily to her. And you were now one of them, thanks to Jake.

But in a way, so was he. Maybe he had even been the first.

She never even felt it. But Jake did. You made sure of that. Like both a punishment and a gift, he felt the instantaneous explosion of pain you sent through her that evaporated her where she stood without even an ounce of exertion from your body.

He doubled over in the same instant, gasping out in pain as he desperately gripped onto Josh's pant leg. Danny and Adele looked on in horror as nothing but remnants of Rebecca in the form of dust now floated in their vision.

Josh had crouched low instantly to ensure his twin was alright, his face out of your life of sight, but Jake? Jake had his eyes on you. He wore a similar expression of horror at what you had done, even as he gasped through the pain he had felt from her and fought to control it. But his eyes never faltered on yours.

And as he wilted there in front of you, the image of you in his vision suddenly morphing into someone he hardly even recognized, your eyes never shied from his either. You had nothing left to hide from him.

“An irresponsible use of power,” was all you said before you turned to leave them all where they stood, stunned and silent, like they had never even known you. And the truth was, they hadn’t. Not the you that you now were.

You weren’t even certain Sam would follow. You weren't certain you deserved him after it all. Actually, you felt quite certain that you didn't.

But he never even hesitated.

—

You didn’t know it as Sam drove you away from the house that you wouldn’t see them all again for several decades. Sam would make the trip a few times over the years without you until things eventually smoothed over, but for now, you left them behind willingly in favor of a house standing tall on a cliffside overlooking the ocean.

The constant swell of seawater beating against rocky cliff below you created a peaceful backdrop for you and Sam to begin your new lives together. And there overlooking the angry ocean, hardly a soul existed to torment you, not that Sam couldn’t handle it.

“I bought half the beach so we wouldn't have to worry about people,” you heard him say from behind you as you looked out the wide pane of glass in your fishbowl porch that painted a view so breathtaking before you.

But you turned on your heels to take in the even more breathtaking view that stood behind you.

“And the ocean here is always terrifying. Should drown those voices out, when they come.”

“There are hardly any here,” you said quietly.

It was funny; now that the two of you found yourselves truly alone for the first time, Sam looked incredibly nervous and you felt as such.

The two of you weren't used to such quiet.

It would be an adjustment, quelling the remnants of your anger alongside the confusion your body still felt at being alive. It would take some getting used to, having now returned to a being that needed sleep to get through the day. You were still changing in ways you didn’t understand, too. And it didn’t help that you no longer knew what exactly you were or what exactly it was that your body needed, that it hungered for. You still found yourself stumbling with fatigue every now and then despite your gifts having returned to you. You even found yourself fighting fits of visions, none from this world but from a world beyond, that always seemed to have you doubling over and screaming out for Sam. But each time you stumbled, he caught you. Each time you called out his name, he found you. And each time you hungered, he was there to satiate you.

You hadn’t lived in the house together for long before a particularly hard day found you. You’d slept late while the sun shined high in the sky warding off a storm brewing several miles away. You'd been kept awake the night before by a barrage of terrors that Sam had begged you to let him quiet. And you finally had let him after several hours. He’d lulled you into a peaceful sleep and ensured you would remain that way until you were more rested. And when you woke, you woke to a house with every curtain drawn tightly shut so as not to wake you. But Sam was no longer beside you.

You padded quietly through the house to find him standing in the large fishbowl porch just off the front of the home, drinking some thick, red blood from a purple mug he must have gotten when he’d decided to attend university some several decades earlier. And his eyes scanned the horizon where the storm drew closer.

Sam had been opting for blood bags from a local hospital since the move. You felt bad knowing how much he loved the fresh stuff but he had insisted upon a quicker method of dining. He hated leaving you even for the hour it took to acquire the stuff. When you had a better handle on things, you'd encourage him to feed the way you knew he needed to. But for you, blood no longer seemed necessary. It seemed that now what your body wanted more than anything was sleep. You were constantly running on empty.

Only once had you felt energized, on a night that Sam had had to shut out the world around you as you sat huddled in bed, shaking in fear at the thing staring at you from the corner of the room. He'd taken your face in his hands and made it all disappear. And then for good measure, he'd given you a memory to hold onto, one of his older ones from back when he was human with Danny. A happy one before their lives had changed. And it had seemed to wake you, like a jolt of caffeine injected directly into your veins. Sam had done some research in the days that had followed and came to the conclusion that you fed off the very same thing as the souls around you did: the living. The two of you just hadn't yet figured out exactly how to harness it.

“I'm sorry, I hope you didn't feel like you had to be quiet for my sake,” you said softly as you crept up behind him with the lavender-colored linen duvet from your bed draped over your shoulders.

That was the other thing you couldn't get used to: the cold. You were still cold to the touch but now it ran deeper, like it permeated your bones. Sam hated it. He hated feeling like he was only chilling you further every time he touched you. But you didn't mind it. It just seemed like a good excuse to rarely leave his bed or to stay bundled up in his sweaters.

“No, no, it’s okay. It kills me to watch you struggle but I know you want to learn to manage these things on your own,” he said just as quietly as he brushed your hair over your shoulder and smiled warmly down at you. “Are we still alone?” he asked.

It had become his new “stay with me”, a quick and easy question he could ask to judge where your mind was at without overstepping your own determination. Heaven forbid something happen to him and you couldn't even get through the first night alone, not that you would even want to.

“Yes, we’re still alone,” you answered before you inhaled a deep breath and tucked yourself under his arm to take in the view of the dark storm rolling across a marvelous expanse of sky. “It’s just going to take me some time to get the hang of things. Feel more normal again.”

He turned his body to face yours, setting his mug down on a wicker table so his hands were free to take either side of your face between them gently. Your eyes fell shut at the feeling, a feeling that was indescribable now that your heart wasn’t caught between him and someone else.

“Take all the time you need,” he whispered softly. “We have plenty of it.”

You let the weight of your head rest completely in his hands, lolling it to one side as you felt his face draw nearer to yours at the behest of your fingers working to find friction in his shirt.

“Actually, I don't think I need time,” you corrected yourself in a light murmur, your eyes still rocked closed.

“No?” he questioned.

You shook your head gently and opened your eyes, though they found themselves instantly fixed to his lips and far too intrigued to move.

“No. Your hands make me feel more normal than anything else.”

Your mouth willed him forward, lips parted and face angled up toward his, waiting, ever so patiently.

It felt like an eternity before his lips finally brushed against yours, just barely meeting yours where they yearned for him so desperately. But when you felt him there, grazing gently along your skin in an almost timid manner, as though he were testing the waters, you closed what little distance there still was keeping you apart, connecting your mouths more fully in a delicate kiss.

It was different having his mouth pressed to yours now, different than anything you had felt in the past. Your soul was no longer being pulled in two different directions, fighting to just feel him. Now, it was only him there with you, no fight needed. It was clarity in a world that seemed to lack that very thing.

When your lips parted briefly, his eyes met yours, staring down at you warmly while his thumbs memorized the skin pulled across your cheeks.

“I wish my hands could forget the last thing they did to you.” He spoke quietly but you could see very plainly the hurt in his eyes as he relived the very thing his brother had run from.

You took his hands in yours, pressing them between your palms and squeezing them tightly.

“The last thing they did was make me feel more alive than I have ever felt,” you assured him.

When his lips met yours again, they were no longer timid. They moved against yours fervently, like they had something they wanted to show you. And they did.

You and Sam hadn't done much in the way of physicality since you'd left for the cliffside. He had insisted it could wait until you had a better handle on things. But as the weeks passed, your need for him had only grown to immeasurable heights and now, you no longer cared if you were mentally unstable or not. You'd find yourself in an even more dire situation if you didn’t have him. And soon.

Sam smiled against your lips as he read your mind. “You already have me; didn’t you know that?”

You smiled back as his hands grew needy against your body, feeling the skin and the lines and the curves he was convinced he'd never get enough of. Thank God you had an eternity to spend together. No limit of time would ever be enough to truly get your fill of him.

It felt like your bodies found one another in slow motion, amongst an almost silent backdrop that only held in the air the sound of waves far beneath you and the trickle of rain that had started from above you, neither of which could touch you in the safety of your home and the safety of his arms.

Your body sought his in any way it could while he walked you through the house, each room quieter and more still than the last, until you blindly reached bed. And you didn't mind the cold as you went. In fact, your hands searched for it, fervently, that smooth, cold skin that they'd barely even been allowed to touch save for a much more shameful moment against a tree in a forest and covered in blood. It wasn't like that now, though. There was no shame to be found as you stripped him of his clothes so quickly, you knew he'd find tears in the fabric when this was long over.

Sam's hands acted with that same sense of urgency and desperation, a cartographer eager to map the planes of your body and how they belonged to him. How they existed for him. His movements to undress you were like silent little promises, each and every one, whispers of the way he felt for you, demonstrations of the way he'd care for you.

You could have remained that way forever and never felt anything but happiness, with Sam in front of you, bared to you and you to him, and your body pressed into his until every crack was sealed and no inch of space went untouched by him.

His hands rested flat against your back, drawing down along your shoulder blades until they reached the dimples at your lower back and the swell of your ass. And then he dipped them even lower to grab at your thighs and part them for him, lifting you high up around his waist to fit snugly between your legs. Even with your eyes closed and your mouth still claiming his, you memorized his body against yours. It would be your new calming memory, your new sense of peace, the thing you used to ground yourself when the nights got difficult.

You barely even registered the sea of plush that hit your back as he used the mattress stopping you to bring his body even closer to yours, pressing into you hard and hungry all while he devoured you.

You begged him with your body and your mind alike to let you feel him inside of you, the last form of connection you'd ever need. But as his mind searched yours, wading through the messy waters there to listen the way he usually did, he pulled his lips away finally, along with his body, until he only stood between your legs, gazing down at you lying ready for him on the bed.

“Are we still alone?” he asked, reaching down to trace lines along your thigh where he could still reach.

You didn't even need to check the way you sometimes did, when you'd fearfully set your eyes to turn about the room, looking for shadows, listening for voices. You could tell just by the silence that engulfed you that he was the only one there with you.

You lifted yourself up onto your elbows and then onto your palms until your torso raised parallel to his where he stood just beside the bed. And you brought your lips to his skin, the expanse around his navel first to let your tongue taste the saltiness there. You heard him let out a gasp above you as your cold fingers found him next, wrapping around his length as your mouth traveled up and down and along his torso that seemed to heave beneath your touch.

Those droopy, doughy eyes watched you carefully as you savored him. You felt indescribably lucky to be touching him this way. Even just to have him this way.

“There's no one here but you and me,” you whispered against his skin.

The way it was meant to be.

He worked a hand into your hair to pull your face away, enough to angle your head back to gaze up at him. And with your mouth vacant once more, he leaned down to connect your lips again, this time taking himself in his hand and angling his hips just right so that he could slide easily between your legs and thrust himself inside of you.

You gasped against his mouth as he stilled himself there, giving you both a moment to truly feel one another as you became one in an instant.

His eyes fell shut the way yours did and your lips hovered close to one another's, both parted and breathing deeply to steady the sudden desperate ache that grabbed at you, begging you to move at light speed to continue what you'd started.

“I don't know how I got this lucky,” he shook his head almost in disbelief just before he worked both of his hands up into your hair to steady himself against you once more, enough to draw his hips back slowly and thrust them forward again, sinking himself deeper into you. You both moaned at the feeling, the sounds mingling together and dancing in the air until it was impossible to tell where one noise ended and the other began.

You could hear nothing but the waves and the rain and the sounds he made as he lifted you just off the bed to position himself better, coming down to hover over you as his hips couldn't help but work themselves up into a rhythm.

God, you needed him. You needed this every waking second for the rest of eternity. It was the way his hands gripped your skin to pull you closer, the way his moans started deep in his chest and muffled themselves against your mouth, the way he felt filling you up and nudging the deepest parts of you, all of him really that conjured up happy tears in your eyes and the vacancy in your lungs.

His hand moved to your chest, slender fingers splaying out flat against your body to push you backward against the mattress again, giving himself a better view as he sent another sharp thrust through his hips, driving himself deeper inside of you until you could practically feel him in your stomach. And he moved slowly to savor his every movement but his pelvis drove into you hard, each thrust sending you scooting halfway up the bed as decency fell away and only an urgent hunger for one another remained.

His name, it was the only thing you knew as your back arched off the bed and your fingers reached out to grab at his chest or his arms or his hair, whatever they could find to grip and keep you tethered to him.

“I love you, Sam. Fuck, I love you. I love you,” you gasped from underneath him as the feelings overflowed in your chest, culminating in a prayer to him.

Sam dipped his head back down with a gentle curse and brought his lips to the skin just below your breasts. And you waited to feel fangs sink into your skin there. You waited for that piercing pleasure to send hot, sharp pain through your body. But it never came. Only his lips and tongue graced you, peppering you with lazy, sloppy kisses while his hips never even faltered.

“I have loved you for so long,” he answered between kisses and drags of his tongue against your icy skin. “And I'll love you to the end.”

You took his position as an opportunity to weave your hands into his long hair, letting them tangle themselves and pull as they pleased as your body sought his up and off the bed.

“And after or I'll haunt you, Samuel. Wherever you are in the afterlife, I'll find you-oh fuck!” A sharp gasp cut through your words as he nudged that beautiful spot inside of you.

He brought his face level with yours, showing off the smile that had spread on his lips.

“And after,” he promised with a nod, just before his brows furrowed and his mouth dropped open at the feeling of you squeezing tighter around him.

It was like its own little source of pleasure, knowing you could cause a reaction like that in him. It sparked something a bit more animalistic inside of you, prompting you to pull him down roughly and roll him over onto his back so you could begin to ride him at a much faster pace. But he quickly lifted his body up to meet yours, wrapping a strong arm around the small of your back to help guide your rhythm.

“Fuck,” he grunted, his face taking on a determined look as his hands worked with your hips to spur your movements on. Just a little harder, just a little faster.

You moaned out a loud sound as you wrapped your arm around his shoulders and dropped your forehead down onto him. Each raise and lowering of your hips brought him closer, brought you closer.

His hands worked hard to spread across every inch of your skin as your hips rolled against him, taking him as deeply as you could.

“I-I swear you saved me,” he stuttered out against the feeling, against your skin. “When we met, I was giving up.”

You squeezed your eyes shut at his words, moving faster and truthfully, feeling nothing but him and the blinding bliss his body created.

“Shit-” His words threatened to fail him as expletives began to drip from your own mouth like a chant now. But he seemed so determined to make you understand just exactly how he felt, as if you couldn’t feel it in the way his body clung to yours or in the way his eyes drooped just a little more with the heavy weight of his love for you.

“Everything inside of me burns with desire for you,” he grunted as he gripped your waist tighter and bounced you harder on his length.

“Oh fuck, Sam-” you choked out.

“I swear,” he breathed out, enraptured in your bliss almost more than his own, “you’ve made me better.”

It was his words that did it in the end, sending you crashing over the edge with his name burned into your throat as your walls clenched hard around him. And he followed not long after, spilling deep inside of you and clutching your body as close to his as he could manage.

The aftermath you had left took the shape of bed linens strewn across the floor along with clothing that may or may not have been wearable again in its current state. And in bed, your bodies entangled that same way, haphazard and draped wherever they had left off with one another. But even so, his lips strolled along your skin lazily, whatever he could reach as you fell back onto the mattress like he was reluctant to let the moment end.

You knew what he was doing. He was committing this very moment to memory, trying not to lose even a single detail.

“A new favorite.” It wasn’t so much a question but he nodded in confirmation.

“A new favorite.”

You couldn't help the smile that spread across your lips.

He seemed to be settling into the bed, likely to help you sleep, but you hardly felt tired. Actually, you'd never felt more alive than you did in that moment. So wearing only a mischievous smirk, you slipped off the mattress as he eyed you and your form carefully.

You waltzed across the room to his side of the bed as the confusion grew on his face. And when you stood next to him and took his hand gently in yours, you gave him a grin.

“I'll race you,” you teased just before you flew out the door behind you.

You could hear him yelling from behind you as you went.

“Where are you going? You're indecent!”

“Come find me beneath the water!” you yelled back, pushing through every door in your way until your feet had found solid ground.

Then you flung your body over the cliff's edge.

And when your body hit the water and began to sink into it like a rock, welcoming the vast darkness that existed below the bellowing surface, you again found yourself unable to contain the smile that formed at your lips when you felt the splash of him meeting you there.

Taglist: @gvfcinema @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @hippievanfleet @crossczeched48 @cassiesgreta @sunfl0wer-power @abby-gvf @joshkiszkasfoot @joshskittytickler @lightsofthe-living-gvf @i-choose-the-road @am-bam @alwaysdaydreamingoffiction @themoreyou-love @bumblebeewrites @coolmedown @sacredthesin @jonch-gvf @justdamnpeachy @fallenstar1708 @vanfleeter @laurengvf8 @allybtj @watching-over-hypegirl @hr33gvf @kaitburb @threadofstars @jennasometimesreads @samiiijones @jakekiszkasmommy @lallisonl @therobynsworld-blog @misshunnybee @sparrowofthedawnsworld @demonrat444 @malany-gvf @myownparadise96 @capturethechaos @st4rdust-ch0rds @montenegroisr @sacredjake @notthedroidz @sinarainbows @kissingthegoat @eraofstardustchords @cherryflo @blacksoul-27 @lyndz2names @earthgrlsreasy @gvfmarge @carlyfleet @thetroublegetssoloud71 @withlovegvf @suzi107 @gracev0609 @objectsinspvce @kissakiszka @amorlizette @stardustcatcher @notsostrangerthing @brokebellsgvf @sweet1squash @imleavingyoufornewyork @lipstickitty @mavvanfleet

#gvf #greta van fleet #jake kiszka #josh kiszka #sam kiszka #danny wagner #greta van fleet fic #greta van fic #greta van fleet smut #gvf smut #josh kiszka smut #jake kiszka smut #josh kiszka fic #jake kiszka fic #sam kiszka fic #danny wagner fic #gvf fic #fire in the water

78 notes · View notes

sleepingcup · 8 months

Text

"I care for you!"

Game: Reverse 1999 x Reader

Characters: Horropedia x Reader

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Platonic Fluff, Crushing on you, signs of Depression

Disclaimer: This is purely made for fun, be well aware of ooc and mistypings.

Summary: You just woke up from a harsh nightmare that you can't recover. Finding yourself to his arms for comfort.

The world is cruel in so many ways.

And so is dreams and nightmares.

Both are brutally cruel and it can be hard to breathe, you wonder why how does people deal with this bullshit everyday. It is like a cycle of repeat that has been replayed over and over again.

"..."

Finding yourself wandering in the halls, you check the place one by one not caring about what happens next you went to do your usual job in your own office adjusting paperwork and reports so it can put the others at ease.

Getting yourself a cup of hot water/coffee/tea you need to refresh yourself from the pain it can't fully help you thanks to the brain re-remembering the nightmare. Everything hurts but you think you got used to it.

While you are doing your early morning tasks you soon got a visitor that appear to your office quietly. Facing to the person it was your best friend, Joshua who just got himself some freshly cooked hashbrowns.

"Hey (y/n)! Surprised to see you here! Can't sleep is what you are going to reply?"

"...????"

You were a bit confused as to why he was here all of a sudden, seeing as he closed the door right behind him before going straight to you. He still kept that goofy smile that you so admired.

"Want a hashbrown?"

"... Sure, thanks..."

Horropedia gave you a share of the hashbrown before sitting across from you and watching you take a bite. You stare at him wondering what he was about to say, and yet you paused yourself before you open your mouth.

Soon it was his cue to share his ramblings to you about the horror movies he watched as you listened to him, you do secretly admit that Horropedia is pretty much the best person to talk about anything else to distract your mind. Before you are a bit annoyed at him, but he does grow on you one by one.

How...?

Simple.

Compared to him and his joyful personality, the rest of the people in the ST. Pavlov Foundation are extremely strict.

If you are in two sides of the story, Horropedia and a few others secretly disobey the foundation in a different scenario, the foundation on the other hand had to be strict and check things one at a time. 'Treat them right' is what they provide, and yet you envy the people who secretly disobey the foundation sometimes.

But that is not about the foundation itself no, the situation is right in front of you.

Your own best friend or crush so to say loves to bother you.

You are in a massive distress.

Two choices in mind and yet you knew the answer.

It did not affect the strictness of the foundation, after all. Love, Familiarity, Affection, and Health care are important. Being left alone to deal with the heaviest thoughts could lead to serious incidents.

"Hey, hello~? Earth to (y/n)?"

"!!!"

You snap out of your thoughts to see Horropedia right in front of you, but you noticed that his happy-go-lucky smiling face was turned to real worry.

"...I can tell.... You got a nightmare again aren't you?"

"!!"

You were to stunned to speak, as he sighs gently pinching the bridge of his nose.

"(y/n)... We have been best friends ever since we are both from the orphanage, I am no stranger to know that you had nightmare quite often, and THIS is the face you are showing?"

The tone he say was very serious, you were about to say something more but you felt his warm embrace, "I am worried about you (y/n)! Please remember that! I had to check up on you no matter if they take me away from you, sure it does sound very cheesy but I am making it as simple as possible..."

Your eyes met his before he made a gentle smile, "I care for you, (y/n)! Even if I don't see or show like it but I am telling the truth I just need to let you know that I need you here with me!"

It took moments and yet, your vision gets blurred.

Knowing what it was, you gently wipe your face, tears are falling from your eyes. Soon you found yourself near Joshua, your lips gently touching his chest as you feel his arms hugging you closer to him. Shaking in his arms you found yourself weak as he gently squeeze you tighter.

You can't help but to tell him what nightmare you encounter as he just listens to you not even bothered to interrupt you.

"You know, you getting those nightmares are purely concerning... Oh! I know! Lets go to my room and I will help you go to sleep by watching horror movies with me!"

"... But...won't tha-"

"Relax I can just let them know that you need a rest, its only fair considering you often overwork yourself to the bone!"

Hating to admit that he is right, you had no choice but to lean to his chest with a nuzzle, he soon gets your intention and gently takes care of you and your office before carrying you to his room. He soon puts you to your room to change and grab a blanket and you did what you were told, as a result you two were now in his room. Horropedia wraps you like a burrito and snuggles you the second he opens another horror movies. You watched with him cozied up with him, and yet you found yourself leaning on him more often till you closed your eyes.

All Horropedia can do was keep an eye on you, but he isn't planning on letting you go.

He does admit to himself that he had a crush on you ever since you saved him from being caught by the foundation and plus spending time with him.

Without you knowing he feels happy knowing that he gave you a kiss on the head hoping that your nightmares are gone.

#reverse 1999 #r1999 #reverse 1999 x reader #r1999 x reader #horropedia #joshua #horropedia x reader #reverse 1999 horropedia

53 notes · View notes

yaeggravate · 10 months

Text

Theory: Kaeya's Mom is a Scion of Nabu Malikata

you know it's funny how we've gotten zero information about the other half of kaeya's family… unless??

warning: slight crack

Kaeya: According to the merchant I bought it from, mysterious spirits called Jinn often live in lamps like this, and this lamp in particular once housed a very powerful Jinni.

in kaeya's hangout, we are gifted a mysterious lamp. kaeya says the merchant who sold it to him claims it once housed a powerful jinni. this lamp is called Mysterious Lamp of Fate Ordained. (remember this.) kaeya then explains what the jinn are as if he just discovered brand new information which is odd because kaeya has told klee a story about a jinni trapped in a lamp before.

aforementioned story is a reference to the story of The Fisherman and the Jinni from One Thousand and One Nights and also to the in-game book The Shepard and the Magic Bottle, a four star quest item that permanently stays in your inventory.

both stories concern a jinni being freed from a magic bottle upon which they grant three wishes. curiously, kaeya uses the last wish of the in-real-life story instead of the game's. in his version, the jinni gets trapped, in the book of the game, the jinni stays freed.

Kaeya: He said to the Jinni, "Wait, how could your massive body fit inside such a small bottle? I won't ever believe it unless I see with my own eyes!" The Jinni became angry, and said, "Mwahaha. Foolish boy, you dare question my powers!?" The Jinni then returned inside the bottle and the boy swiftly sealed it shut.

The Shepard and the Jinni The young man hesitated for a moment, and asked the last question. "What's it like to live in a bottle?" Seemingly having never heard of such a question before, the spirit was slightly surprised before she answered slowly.

strangely enough, it's not the first time kaeya has been connected to lamps. in the furniture description for Trusty Portable Lamp he went around telling children that the souls of fireflies are trapped inside lamps.

No thanks to the Cavalry Captain's jests, a rather morbid children's tale exists in Mondstadt concerning these lamps. The nuns have had to explain to the kids that no, these lanterns do not contain the imprisoned souls of fireflies.

furthermore, his ascension material is The Spirit Locket of Boreas. probably just another coincidence but nothing can ever be taken for granted when it involves this guy. perhaps all of these strange associations with imprisoned spirits is foreshadowing something bigger, who knows.

still, in the context of his hangout, kaeya's gift being a lamp is actually pretty random compared to gifts of other companions.

so i started thinking, the play and the intaglio showed us his ties to the alberich clan while the other routes showed his ties to mondstadt so it stands to reason that we should have hints towards the unknown maternal side of his family right? could this be the lamp?

before we dive into crack territory let me explain what the jinn are first. they're spirits born from night-blue water lilies that were nourished by nabu malikata's blood. jinn can take the appearance of blobs like dori's spirit or that of humans, and they can even reproduce with them as seen with everyone's most behated lamp, liloupar.

we have no idea how kaeya seemingly dodged the curse but what if he was blessed by a jinni? maybe someone made a contract with a jinni and this is how he's able to age normally. it could even be connected to his lucky coin that can land on any side he wishes. if guoba can be a stove god, it's not too far-fetched to think the coin could house some kind of spirit.

Kaeya: Of course, this whole arrangement hinges on a preexisting amount of trust between the two of us. I can't just get any strange coins to listen to me.

also, liloupar said something interesting about jinn being able to take someone's pain away from them:

Jeht: Can Jinn feel pain too? Liloupar: The Jinn have little need for a vessel, and even less need for senses. But should we begin to connect with others… Then we will take from them their pain… Even should we not comprehend the source of it.

who knows, perhaps this could even extend to a curse.

moving on to the good stuff:

these tcg cards show an unknown woman wearing the Vourukasha's Glow artifact set that is associated with nabu malikata. her outfit resembles nilou's outfit, which is modeled after nabu malikata's, but is noticeably lacking the horns nabu malikata was said to have.

the description for this card is Scions of Khvarena, which means that this lady is most likely just a follower or heir of nabu malikata.

(however, columbina, who is very likely to be a seelie survivor like nabu malikata, has bits of dark pink hair and is also lacking the horns, meaning we can't exactly determine that this woman isn't nabu malikata.)

in any case, the loading screen for khvarena is also called Scions of the Khvarena and it tells us something interesting: that khvarena can dwell inside humans.

Scions of the Khvarena Thanks to the nourishment of the Amrita, the Khvarena split apart to manifest countless forms. Some can find themselves dwelling within individual humans, while others might develop an awareness of their own…

khvarena are spirits that can purify abyssal corruption. they were created by nabu malikata. another interesting bit of trivia is that khvarena used to be localized as Soul Light.

taking a gander here but what if this lady and other human heirs of the khvarena are people who have the khvarena inside of them? i have actually speculated about this before that kaeya's mother might have had khvarena inside of her which ended up neutralizing or suppressing kaeya's curse.

you see, khvarena can reverse the effects of the abyss. and it was said that the oasis could cure all ills. though i should add, it probably isn't very effective on khaenri'ahns who are already cursed, as we've seen with dainsleif who was actually there recovering at the amrita pool but is still zombified.

(khvarena is green energy, and what i found curious is that the lamp kaeya gives you actually emits green smoke when you touch it. kaeya's favorite drink is death after noon, which is green due to the absinthe within. in literature, absinthe is known as The Green Fairy...)

to me, the most intriguing part is that khvarena is based on khvarenah, the divine royal glory.

Khvarenah is an Avestan word for a Zoroastrian concept literally denoting "glory" or "splendour" but understood as a divine mystical force or power projected upon and aiding the appointed. The neuter noun thus also connotes "(divine) royal glory", reflecting the perceived divine empowerment of kings. The term also carries a secondary meaning of "(good) fortune"; those who possess it are able to complete their mission or function.

when you read this, does it not remind you of kaeya's character? we all know by now that kaeya is associated with nobility/royalty, and good fortune (with his lucky coin and some of his dialogue).

Mona: Kaeya Alberich? He's a Pavo Ocellus. Destined for greatness and grandeur… and to hide ugly realities behind a layer of charm and elegance. He believes he has made a clean break with his past, but one day fate will catch up with him. When it does, he will have a major decision to make.

we don't know what kaeya's name is derived from, but it could be from the legendary Kayanians, who were also said to possess khvarenah!

anyway, back to the scions, i think it's possible that the following tribes are the scions of khvarena.

The matriarchs of the Tanit, Uzza, Shimti, and other tribes besides all refer to themselves as "Daughters of the Flower Goddess."

the Flower Goddess is nabu malikata who also calls the khvarena daughter of flowers, meaning these tribes are very likely to be the scions.

"My Khvarena, daughter of flowers…"

and like the lady on the card, matriarch babel of the tanit tribe has light pink hair.

(though, as a reminder, unbeknownst to her, babel was not actually born into the tanit tribe so we can't use her as a reference as she most likely did not have the blessing of khvarena, which is what i suspect is the reason she had to use poor JEHT.)

unfortunately, there's zero information about the other two tribes but shimti caught my eye here.

Ashima was a West Semitic goddess of fate related to the Akkadian goddess Shimti ("fate"), who was a goddess in her own right but also a title of other goddesses such as Damkina and Ishtar.

shimti means fate!!!

FATE!!

mysterious lamp of fate ordained!!!!

peacock accessories, gold accents and dead mom sidebraid!!!!

Traveler: I never knew you could inherit eye patches. Kaeya: My! (Traveler), how could you not know such common knowledge! This is no different from children inheriting their hairstyle from their parents!

kaeya last name shimti REAL you heard it here first-

ok you can laugh now but wouldn't it be nice if kaeya's mom turned out to be a pretty pink haired lady who is a descendent of nabu malikata? i think it would be nice 😌.

#.txt #lore bytes #kaeya alberich #who is kaeya's mom #where is kaeya's mom #WHY NO KAEYA MOM!!!

55 notes · View notes

sfwregressionfanfictions · 1 year

Text

Growing pain: Johanna Mason x little reader

Summary: Johanna and (Y/N) find ways to live after the pain.

Wc: 4k

Tw: hunger games details, mentions of death and gore. Less that The Hunger Games , but more that the average agree fic.

I feel like I’ve lost control of everything since the games ended and the rebellion succeeded. After years of torture, it was over but I wasn’t over it. Mentally I was never free. I feel it lurking around every corner, in my brain and physically.

I see the faces of the people I killed in the arena and for the rebellion. I see the faces of those I lost: Finnick, bogs and so many others. I see the torture I endured in the capital and in my district. I cannot sleep due to this haunting.

I’m lucky enough not to be alone. After the rebellion won the therapist said both Johanna and I should not live alone. We both quickly decided we tolerate each other well enough, so we would rather live together than have a “babysitter”. We still have mandatory therapy appointments but most are done on the phone.

Johanna was loud and harsh a majority of the time, she seemed to have calmed down slightly since our freedom was established. She was outspoken still but she was honest and genuine. She always tried her best to calm me during my episodes, she has improved her ability to empathize but still struggles.

She says I help ground her too. I never feel like I do, but I suppose I can’t determine how she feels. She sometimes talks about how we met, she talks about how she saw me during my games while she was the mentor, and she discusses the past and who we were. Johanna has grown nostalgic, talking about the innocence in my eyes during my first interview. It’s hard to remember. I’m only 21 now, but it’s hard to remember when I was a child or when I had a childhood.

Even before the games, I fought to survive and help my family survive. I trapped animals by the fences and worked for anyone willing to pay. And not to talk about the horrors from after my first game.

Now we live in a house on the edge of the woods in district 7. Johanna has started building a log cabin farther into the woods, as she has wanted to do for a long time, it’s part of her therapy I think. I meet with my therapist meets with me every Saturday morning, and so far she’s said I’ve made no improvements.

She wants to actually meet in person this weekend so we can try a new method. I agreed, only because I knew Johanna would be in the woods. She would probably stay close enough to hear me if I scream, she’s always nervous to leave me with strangers.

Johanna had left early for the woods, claiming she wanted to get a lot of work done. My therapist showed up with a large bag over her shoulder. She made herself comfortable in Johanna and my living room. She accepts my offer of water, rejecting coffee or tea.

“So how have you been sleeping?” She asks, as soon as I sit across from her.

“Umm… The usual amount… I guess maybe a little more…” I reply shyly. I hated that question.

“That’s good that you are increasing your sleep, even just a little. That’s a huge step for you!” She said, she was sincere, but I always feel like she’s being sarcastic. “What about nightmares?”

“No change,” I said almost too fast. It’s not that there was an increase in number, it was an increase in severity.

“Okay, now I was hoping you would be willing to talk about what you were like before the games?” The therapist asked.

“God it’s been so long, I guess I was a normal child? I mean I had a family, I went to school, worked. I was the average kid in my district.” I reply.

“So what I’m hearing is you never really had time for those key parts of being a kid?” The therapist asked, “Did you feel like your needs were being met in all capacities?”

“Yeah! My family gave me the best life they could!” I yell, I felt like she was spitting on the efforts and the fight they put into providing the life I had.

“I didn’t mean to offend you, I simply meant compared to that of perhaps a capital child!” The therapist explained, “the reason I brought it up is so I could be positive that this therapy had a chance to be helpful.”

“What is this therapy?” I said reserved again.

“So it’s called age regression. It is a coping/therapeutic method that helps you reconnect to your inner child, to a point where you were safe and felt loved.” The therapist explained, “what it is, is you revert to a childlike mental state where you will have a chance to engage with like like you are that age.”

I grumble, almost embarrassed that this is even a suggestion. I think about how Johanna’s therapist told her to build the house she wanted and acknowledge the way she feels. AND I GET TURNED INTO A BABY?

“You don’t seem thrilled by the idea, however, I would really like you to give it a genuine try.” The therapist said, “I won’t ask you to attempt in front of me as I know you aren’t ready for that yet. But I would also like you to reflect if there was any time you might have accidentally or unintentionally regressed okay?”

“Yeah, I guess I can try to do that.” I signed.

“Okay, I will leave you with this bag of different items that might help you regress. And how about we call next week and meet in person the time after that?” She asked.

“Yeah, that will work for me,” I said staring at the bag as if it could come alive at any point.

She was quick to leave after that. Once I was alone, I picked up the bag. However, the door goes flying open, and in comes Johanna. She tried to play it cool, but it was obvious she wanted to make sure I was okay.

“What’s in the bag?” Johanna immediately asked, pointing her ax at it.

“Apparently stuff for a new type of therapy…” I gave up the information.

“Yeah? Morphling? That’s some good stuff to help you forget the pain.” She jabs at herself, she had an intense addiction after she was held in the capital.

“Umm… no… I don’t know exactly what is in it…” I didn’t lie, I technically didn’t know exactly what was in the bag.

“Okay,” She raised her hands as a surrender, “I have to get back to work, but I’ll be back before dinner tonight.”

“Okay, be safe,” I reply.

“Obviously, got a lot to do still!” She replied.

With Johanna gone, I brought the bag to my room. I closed to door and immediately started going through the bag. I was almost embarrassed to say that I was excited, it felt like I was getting lots of gifts.

On the top of the bag, I pulled out fake stuffed animals, a bunny, and a bear. I giggled lightly thinking of how Jo and I presented, the stuffed animals looked like us. I was fast and jumpy during my games, like a bunny. Johanna was strong and sturdy with her axe during her games, like a bear.

I go into the bag again and find a few types of dolls. Then I pull out diapers, I yelp at this. I placed the diapers very far away, I wasn’t willing to try that! I grab another item quickly to avoid lingering on the diapers. The item I pull out is a storybook. It was a picture book, it looked like something I would have enjoyed as a kid.

I dove into the bag again, this time pulling out a coloring book. I could do that and not feel too embarrassed. I continued pulling stuff from the bags, primarily toys, pacifiers, and teethers.

With everything laid out, I decided that I was willing to try the coloring books and teethers/paci tonight. The stuffed animals somehow already made themselves at home on my bed. I guess I should put on something comfortable and try what the therapist said.

Once cozy, I lay on the floor and begin looking through the coloring book. I settle on a picture of a Pegasus with butterflies. I begin coloring the picture, I start on the butterflies, coloring the wings a burnt orange. I was cautious of the edges.

Soon enough, I was done coloring the butterflies and I am feeling slightly fuzzy in the head. It was odd, it felt like when I would go to the parties in the capital and would drink the strange bubbly drinks, that always made me giggly. I was giggly now too. I notice I am not holding the crayon correctly anymore. I am gripping it in my fist, and rubbing it against the page.

I feel light, almost weightless. It is nice to feel so carefree, I am childlike again. I feel like when I was 7. I dive back into coloring, one page turns into two turns into a handful. My drawing begins to ignore the lines and I pick the most fun colors rather than the ones that would work together the best. I start sprawling on the floor, rubbing my eyes with my balled-up fist, and haphazardly swiping my hair out of my face with no grace.

I suppose it must have been a while since I began my session. Because it grew dark in my room, as the light from the window faded out of view. I whimper at the change in light, I feel silly being scared of the dark but I was so small. Smaller than when I was 7, I wanted Johanna. I always felt safe with her. However, I couldn’t let her see me like this. I felt embarrassed that this made me feel better, I should be able to deal with it like every other victor. But here I am sprawled on the ground giggling at the pictures I color, as my thumb migrates toward my mouth. Just as it passes my lips, the slamming of a door startles me. Johanna always was rough on the doors after a long day.

“(Y/N)?” She yelled out from the living room. I freeze, think big thoughts, think big thoughts I repeat to myself.

“Yes?” I yell back, I sounded wrong. I move to get up and go to the door, hoping she wasn’t set on coming into my room as there was no time to get everything hidden before she comes in. I was lucky enough to slip out before she made it to my door. I smile at the sight of her sweaty frame, she had been working hard on the cabin. Seeing her like this was always slightly domestic, she had a slight smile and her axe was left at the door.

“What have you been up to, birdie?” Johanna asked, she called me that as the first time we met, I squawked like a bird. I did not mean to she startled me and now she wouldn’t let me live it down.

“I was doing something that the doc wanted me to do…” I reply shyly, It was scary to talk about treatment. Johanna would want to know, making a comment about ‘supporting’ each other. She acted like it was important to us, but I think she just likes being nosy. “I meant to make dinner, but I go distracted…”

“You sound off, weird almost,” Johanna said bluntly, she didn’t mean it in an offensive way she just spoke like that. “How about we cook up some soup now? We got that rice from district 11 that you liked, we can try to make the rice soup seeder made that one time.”

She always seems to remember the small things that I liked. Last week, she decided to visit Finnick (He was alive but had some nasty scars from the muttations.), and came back with a Tupperware of the same dessert Annie made for her baby shower. I mentioned once that I wish I had the recipe so I could remake it, but I knew it was an important family recipe for Annie so I didn't pry.

“I would like that…” I reply, I sounded small and innocent still like a child. Johanna said nothing this time, I suppose she didn’t care enough to point out that fact.

“Start filling that pot up with water, I’m gonna clean up a little,” Johanna says walking to the bathroom, Johanna has gotten better with showers and water in general. She doesn’t freak out about water she knows is going to touch her, but surprise water still gets to her. Puddles, rain, and any splashes.

Once the pot is filled up, Johanna is out of the shower. She is dressed in a tank top and sweatpants. She looks so pretty.

“All filled up, what is the next step chef?” I asked my voice almost back to normal. I still felt slightly fuzzy in my head.

“You are gonna chop up some broccoli, and I am going to make the base and rice.” She said she was always good at delegating work.

With that, she’s pulling goods out of the pantry and fridge, and I am getting the knife and cutting block. By the time I get the large block of wood, I am pretty sure Johanna made it. If I was being honest, using a knife made me nervous still. I would start to shake and think back to my game.

I stood there staring at the board that had broccoli sitting on it, the knife in my hand. I didn’t mean to space out at this scene. I must have stood there too long, not moving. I felt a hand wrap around mine, as I hold the knife. My head whipped around only to see Johanna’s pity-filled smile.

“It’s just broccoli,” Johanna said, it was blunt. It was meant to be soothing though, it worked better on me than it would on others. Johanna did the leg work of cutting up on veggies while I just leaned back into her sturdy frame.

Johanna was always overly gentle with me, even when she was rough on me it did not compare to the roughness she had towards others. When she had flashbacks or breaks, she never hurt me. She would scream and cry, trying to get me away, but would never hurt me. When we first moved back to district 7, she would rarely shower due to her fear of it, however, I slowly got her to shower. I would stand in the way of the water and she would let the mist that bounced off me hit her. It took a while but she eventually got to a point where she was comfortable showering alone.

“You know you can tell me what your head doctor said to you right?” Johanna asked, before following it up, “Or I could call her and have her tell me…”

“I feel like that would be breaking a rule,” I giggled at her. We placed the knife down as we finished cutting the vegetables.

“Then tell me, little bird,” Johanna said, as she poked at my sides. I felt my face go red and my eyes water a bit.

“You will make fun of me, and then leave me here alone,” I reply looking down at my hands.

“Now, does that sound like something I would do?” She asked as she dumped the vegetables into the soup and left it to simmer. “What if I told you something that my head doctor told me to do that I don’t like?”

I stood there, ‘would I trade a secret for a secret?’. I nod as I pull myself onto the counter to sit.

“My doctor says it's important that I start connecting with more people and try to connect on a different level…” Johanna all but groaned out.

“Like date someone?” I squeak back.

“I suppose, something about taking care of someone I connect with and care about… blah blah blah. Like I pay attention to that.” Johanna huffed, her eyes bearing into mine as to say she wanted to say more, to be vulnerable but wasn’t able to form the words.

“Do you not want to ever have that? Someone that loves you as you love them?” I ask quickly, I was never good at hiding my feelings. I always had an affection for her, although I tried to break it. As Johanna would always refuse to love another person after what happened to her.

“I…” She starts and trails off as she stares into my doe eyes. She bit the inside of my cheeks as her eyes flicker to my lips. “Stop trying to stall, tell me what your stupid head doctor said.

I stare at her for a second before reaching my pinky out and asking her if she would still stay with me no matter what. She connected our fingers with a small scuff at my antics. I soon spoke, “So she said before we could deal with the trauma from the games and the umm… you know afterward. I have to address the trauma I have from my childhood…”

“What the f*** does that even mean?” Johanna says, getting angry that the doctor wasn’t just fixing me. I appreciate that she cares this much, but she was being loud and aggressive about it and it startled me.

“She wants me to create a safe childhood for myself…” I am still picking at my nails but I am hyper aware of her shifting next to me.

“What?” She was confused, I could almost hear the cogs turning in her hair.

“She ummm… she wants me to regress…” I finally say, Johanna still didn’t understand but she faked a smile.

“Well, do you think it will fix the screws that are loose?” She asked, it was all she could, she didn’t know anything about it. All I could do was shrug before turning my attention to getting bowls and spoons.

Johanna did not push the topic anymore, at dinner she talked about how the cabin was coming along. She said that I was going to get to decorate it, she would make any furniture I wanted. It was her way of sharing what mattered to her. Her love language

I told her the following day I was going to go into the market to get groceries and asked if there was anything she needed. She said no like always, she always wanted to be the provider. I only smiled and nodded before resuming eating my soup.

The evening was like any other, Johanna and I sat on the couch. She is reading a book about an adventure that takes place far away from here. I sat close to her, writing a grocery list. My head eventually makes its way to her lap. Her hand finds its way to my head, playing with strands, almost petting me. Johanna and I fell asleep like this, I was the first to fall asleep obviously.

This happens a lot, usually when this happens Johanna will either carry me to bed or if she is tired also she will simply wiggle in. She tries to wake up before me so I dont catch her being soft but sometimes I get lucky. I was not lucky that morning, she was gone by the time I woke up. She was most likely in the woods again or perhaps she went to speak with the lady down the street to get a new ax head made.

I did not fret over her whereabouts, she was strong and reliable. I was quick getting ready, I loved days at the market. Now that people are able to enjoy life, the market was light and airy. Kids played and danced, there was always music playing and the shopkeepers were always throwing extra into my bag, as I was a ‘leader’ in the rebellion. I always refused the gifts, I was never a leader, simply a survivor.

Today I stopped by a small flower stand, I always pause to look at them. I could never get myself to buy them, I feel like a capital citizen using money on lavish goods when people could be starving. I am aware the war is over and the likelihood of starvation is low with the new leadership.

I was in the market for about two hours before deciding to walk back to victors village. I took what was considered the long way back, and it only took an additional 5 minutes. However, I enjoyed the extra 5 minutes of birds singing and trees so tall I couldn’t see the top.

When I returned, I opened the door to find Johanna on the couch reading a book. ‘Must have decided to have a short day,’ I think as I drop the groceries in the kitchen before walking over to see how she was. Once I walk back into the living room, I see the title of the book she was reading. I freeze, “Age regression: explanations and tips”. There were other books all similarly themed.

“What are you doing?” I ask nervously. I nibbled on my lip to keep from attempting to remain grounded.

“Reading.” She said dryly, flipping the page. She was obviously enthralled by the book. She had tabs sticking out of it and a pen in her lap.

“You don't have to read that, you can act like nothing is happening!” I meekly reply. I want to cry from embarrassment, how could I be doing this nonchalantly. This is embarrassing.

“Why would I do that? That is stupid.” She didn’t spare a glance away from the book, “Do you need help with the groceries?”

“Umm… No, I can do it. You don’t have to worry about it.” I sputtered out as she finally glanced away from the page she was on, placing a bookmark in it and stood up.

“Too late, you are stuck with my help.” Johanna grunted walking past me to the kitchen.

I follow behind, looking lost. All I could really think of was ‘why?’. Why would Johanna go out of her way to do this for me? Why did it seem she was enjoying my suffering?

“Ohhh, you got the stuff for the meal we had when Katniss visited! It was tasty. When are we making it?” She asked, snapping me out of my mental tirade.

“We can make it whenever, there isn't a specific day I was planning to make it.” I reply, grabbing the bag that held the fruits I bought us.

“Cool, cool. You should read some of the books I got, they are really informative.” She said, watching me like she did during the 75th hunger games. Cautiously, ready to save me from an unseen force.

“Why did you get them?” I ask, staring at the apples I placed in our fridge.

“Well we are gonna be living together for a while so I thought I should at least know a little of what was going on in that head…” Johanna trailed off, an unsureness settling over us.

We let the silence fill the room until she lets out a forced cough. I popped my head up from were I was squatting, still holding the food I meant to put away. She spoke, “So I read that usually regressors have a caregiver, did your doc say anything about getting one?”

I shook my head, not knowing exactly what it was. I did understand she seemed bitter about it. She seemed glad to know I wasn’t planning to get one, she was rather territorial.

“Okay, for now perhaps, I could take on that role? Then my shrink is happy and I know that you are safe.” She suggests.

“Okay, I suppose that’s okay. I don’t know what that means though.” I said.

“I will teach you”

#baby cece asks #little!reader #age regression #little space #age regression fic #agere fic #age regression caregiver #agere fics #johanna mason x reader #cg! johanna mason #johanna mason x little! reader

104 notes · View notes

sohcah--toa · 5 months

Text

bullet train/マリアビートル details ~

Hello!! I recently dug up the Bullet Train script (if you search it up, you should be able to find it relatively easily!! I'm not sure if it's completely reliable but it seems to be the first version) and listened to the soundtrack. (It's awesome, you should listen if you haven't already!!)

There's a lot of stuff here about マリアビートル, I hope you enjoy reading 🥳 (It's really ridiculous)

-- 1 ) LEMON'S CHILDHOOD // BACKGROUND(??)

I attached a photo for reference in the book!! :D (there's highlighter marks, I'm sorry) His backstory is tragic and aahh noo 🥹... I won't say much on it because we're all thinking the same thing. In the script, this is carried over when Lemon passes out because of the water. But apparently, in the final movie, this isn't shown a lot. In the book and movie, they aren't brothers and have a considerably colder relationship, so I can understand why the childhood scene in the cut is so much more wholesome. (Still supersuper cool though!!)

-- 2) "I'm forever blowing bubbles"

The original reason why this song was chosen for Bullet Train was because of Tangerine's West Ham United sticker (turns out, that's a football club). Hey!! But wait a minute!! There's a funny coincidence because Ladybug in the book was trying to become a football star. He has a quote that's like "my friend told me that someone like me could either become a footballer or a criminal, so I did both" and he says that his first crime was stealing a football.

The song delves into themes surrounding fortune as well!! I love their music selection 🙇‍♂️😤

-- 3) THREE ASSASSINS/グラスホッパー REFERENCES

Okay this part (in a way...) contains spoilers for Three Assassins, which is the first book of the "series"! ! The story revolves around a guy named Suzuki, who appears again in Bullet Train!! He kinda-sorta becomes friends with Ladybug and it's like 😊 they are so happy. To be completely honest, Suzuki's a bit traumatised but so is Ladybug, right?? Lovely friendship!!

It's also so interesting that he's reading a hotel buffet menu because his wife used to love eating at buffets and he adopted the habit of hoarding all the food as well. He's on the train to meet with his dead wife's family (which was extremely difficult for him after her passing).

-- 4) BULLET TRAIN REFERENCES IN THE MANTIS/AX

There's this other book in the series called The Mantis or AX for the Japanese version. This one isn't talked about a lot but if you like family stories, this book is so so soo good. It really pulled at my heartstrings when I first read it but I can't say too much without spoiling everything. Anyway, it makes a few references to Bullet Train and literally starts with the main character, Kabuto (an assassin), having a flashback to talking to Tangerine and Lemon during one of his missions, where they had the same target so they worked together. The Twins really respect him, actually, but find it funny that he's so careful around his wife (YES KABUTO, AN ASSASSIN, HAS A WIFE). Some characters reappear so.. :")) yay!!

-- 5) 777

Ladybug comes back!! He comes back in the latest book in the series; 777. So far, the Japanese reviews have been pretty positive and I think there's an English translation coming in November!! 🥳 I like how the title is 777; 7 like 7 tails in Nanao (七尾), car 7, his favourite number is 7 (if I recall correctly), 7 the "lucky number".

-- 6) THIS GUY

No one asked but I heavily dislike the Prince in the book. (to be honest, who doesn't...) He's just mean for no reason and likes ruining people's lives, makes fun of poor Ladybug (this really isn't that bad compared to the other stuff he does) and yeah, the list goes on. Also apparently he (heavily) tortures other schoolmates and it's not like he gets paid for it like the Twins or the other guys. He just does it for fun?? OK!! The premise of his character is amazing and it's great to see a villain that's actually just straight evil but since he's designed that way, we are validated when hating him ww. He talks about politics as well for some reason... keeps referencing historical tragedies.... man.

-- 7) ASAGAO/THE PUSHER

The Pusher is back too!! Weee~ (not really)

In the movie, it seems as though this entire part got cut out which, like, is reasonable. I attached a photo from the Grasshopper (2015) movie for reference hahaha. The guy in the black suit is the Pusher!! Yeah, he pushes people!! (not in the fun way!!)

He is in charge of protecting Wataru from the Prince's guy, although he's reluctant at first. He's obsessed with bugs and stuff. Whenever he opens his mouth, it's probably going to be about bugs. The Pusher's also strangely poetic. Maybe it's because he likes old bands like the Rolling stones? Oh!! And he gets mentioned in The Mantis.

And speaking of the Kimura family, Yuichi Kimura says something very true and it's:

"who do they gotta make the train toilets so nasty"

-- 8) LADYBUG IS COOL

This is very much a fact. In Mariabeetle, he gets kidnapped when he's 8 years old because he gets mistaken for a rich kid (after he lost a bet with his wealthy friend and had to wear his "rich person backpack"), then in the place he's being held captive, he escapes by HIMSELF since his dad isn't able to give the guys money for his son back (since they took the wrong person!!). But heyy he's resourceful and smart.

AND guess what?? He gets traumatised because there was this other boy being held but Ladybug didn't save him and it's haunted him ever since. This is also one of the reasons why he ends up helping the Prince even though he knows it won't do him any good.

Obviously, it gets worse from there. He makes it back to his family and they're pretty happy. Unfortunately, they're far from rich and Ladybug has to study extremely hard to get into a college. Spoiler alert, he doesn't. THE THING IS!! He studied so hard!! It's just that during his exam, some kid sneezed on his paper and he wiped it, smudging all his work and even his name!! Nanao! No!!

-- 9) TANGERINE BOOK RECS

To the Lighthouse - Virginia Woolf

"We perished, each alone."

-> He really loves that quote. A lot. Also he's a Virginia Woolf fan!!

2. Forbidden Colours - Yukio Mishima

-> He's also a Yukio Mishima fan... I wonder if he's ever read "The Sound of Waves". What would he think about it? Hahaha this will keep me up at night 😅 (<- SLANTED EMOJI!!)

3. The Sailor who Fell from Grace with the Sea - Yukio Mishima

-> To talk about Article 41 of the Penal Code of Japan. (Mr Kotaro Isaka, the author, studied law, by the way!! It's interesting!!) However, here, Tangerine quotes Mishima on Article 41 ;)

4. Hemingway and Faulkner

-> Actually it's a collection so it's not really a book recommendation but these two people are real - Ernst Hemingway (the Old Man and the Sea guy) and William Faulkner. They didn't really get along, by the way, and even though they respected the other's work, they criticised more than praised. Sounds like the Twins.

5. Demons - Fyodor Dostoevsky

-> "Crime is no longer insanity, but simply common sense, almost a duty; anyway, a gallant protest."

I think the author is a heavy Fyodor Dostoevsky fan, just because he also referenced his works in Three Assassins.

6. Crime and Punishment ;D

-> "Science now tells us, love yourself before all men, for everything in the world relies on self-interest."

(CONT'D) yeahh this book was referenced in Three Assassins and one of the characters is obsessed with it. Glad to see that Tangerine is a fan too hahahaha.

-- 10) LEMON IS AWESOME

Opinionated text here but Lemon is plain awesome.

"Between the principal's name and Doraemon's gadgets, it was blindingly obvious which one was more important."

To each their own and I know he's a criminal but he seems like he has no enemies. Sounds very wholesome.

-- 11) HORNET THE MVP

She's in Three Assassins AND the Mantis!! Hypercool. In both books, the Hornet is a team of a male and a female. The female is eliminated (this word choice ww) by Ladybug but the male is still up and kicking, though Ladybug feels bad about it. They use poison needles, like the movie, but they trigger anaphylaxis, which is a really dangerous allergic reaction that causes body shocks.

-- 12) SUZUKI: PHILOSOPHER AND ECONOMIST

"If people knew that they might be killed by someone tomorrow, economic activity would grind to a halt."

... well 😅 take from that what you will.

(that's Suzuki!!)

Cela dit... that's all.... so long, I'm sorry. But thank you so much if you read until the end!! I hope you at least found it a bit entertaining!! :"))

#bullet train #kotaro isaka #ladybug bullet train #maria beetle #bullet train novel #tangerine bullet train #lemon bullet train #three assassins #grasshopper 2015 #ranting #do you wanna read an economics student's ramblings about something that has pretty much nothing to do with econ while finishing a report? ;#all the characters are so likeable... I don't know. I love all of them.#my mother blocked me because i kept sending her bullet train gifs #brainrot is brainrotting

21 notes · View notes

miraculouslbcnreactions · 6 months

Note

Hi. :D

Regarding the ending, it seems like the fandom divided about Marinette's decision to hide the truth from Adrien. I've seen group of people believing the lie is the result of her being manipulated by Gabriel, there's other who said that it's in character for Marinette to control information and compare it to what she did in Bubbler episode and there's also people who believe that the lie is a result of the wish that make Marinette's memory become blurry hence why she believed that Gabriel and Monarque are two different people.

What about you? What do you think about Marinette decision? What could be reasoning?

Thank you and I'm sorry for grammar error. ;;

My personal opinion is that it's all the result of bad writing, making it impossible to guess Marinette's motivation. If/when her motivation is revealed, I'm guessing it's going to make about as much sense as Alya knowing who Ladybug is and still believing Lila. To show you what I mean, I'll just go through the arguments you bring up one-by-one and explain why they don't hold much water.

Gabriel Manipulating Marinette

For this point to make sense, Gabriel needed to actually manipulate Marinette, but that's not what we see. He makes a dying request of her, but nothing in the fight or the season backs up her caring about that request. The lead up to the wish is largely Bugnoir and Monarch in a verbal sparing match that looks something like this:

Bug Noire: You'd know this if you ever took an interest in him. But in reality, Adrien means NOTHING to you anymore! You've locked him in your house — LOCKED him in your Alliance rings! Locked him into a life that allows you to hide behind him in order to justify YOUR madness! Lucky Charm!! (summons a tube of glue) Monarch: All I want is for him to be happy

Oh yeah, she's being so manipulated here! Gabriel is totally changing her mind about everything! That's why the fight literally ends with Gabriel changing his mind and making a different wish than originally intended! That's how manipulation works, right?

If the message of this fight was supposed to be that Gabriel manipulated Marinette and not the other way around, then it would need to look something like this comic where he guilts her into keeping his secrets. It would need look like this because Gabriel and Marinette have nothing close to a positive relationship. They hate each other. They also know next to nothing about each other, which is why the fight's dialogue is nothing but exposition and squabbling over who knows Adrien better as Adrien is literally their only connection.

This is why the only manipulation that would work on Marinette is guilt tripping her about the reveal hurting Adrien because Marinette doesn't give two shits about Gabriel. But Gabriel doesn't do that. He just politely asks her to not tell Adrien:

Gabriel: (turns around to Marinette) Marinette, make sure that Adrien never knows about the villain that I was, (puts down the twin rings on the ground) but instead, that he remembers the times I tried to be a good father. (turns back to Gimmi)

This is not manipulation. He's not messing with her emotions. He doesn't say anything like, "telling Adrien will hurt him immensely Marinette. If you love him, you'll let him remember me as a loving father." He just makes a request of a young woman who hates him and hopes for the best.

If Marinette loved Gabriel and was heartbroken that he was her enemy, then his dying wish could be argued to be a form of manipulation because he knows how much she cares for him and how much his actions hurt her and how much she doesn't want to remember him as a villain, but that's not what the writers wrote. Instead, they gave us things like the pancake scenes and Gabriel trying to break Adrienette up with magic.

Marinette likes Controlling Information

I've talked about the scarf thing and Marinette's general tendency toward secret keeping before. My general thoughts are that there is no point in the show where Marinette is shown to like keeping secrets or controlling information. She only ever keeps secrets that arguably should be kept. The show has also never put her in a situation where she has an ongoing lie that actively hurts someone.

You may be thinking about the scarf thing as a counter argument, but for that to be an indication of how she handles ongoing lies, it would need to be an ongoing lie in the actual narrative and not just the fandom. As is, the scarf appeared in one episode and was then forgotten by the show. The scarf lie was also a split-second decision made without any knowledge of why the lie even happened.

If Adrien wore the scarf all the time and talked about how much it meant to him that his father had gotten him such a wonderful gift, then I'd agree with you that the scarf sets Marinette up as the type of person who might keep the senti thing a secret. But that's not what the show actually does. She's never confronted with this lie again. At this point, it would honestly be weird for her to bring it up.

I'm sure someone is reading this and thinking about the Chat Blanc thing, but the narrative treats that episode in such a confusing way that I don't even know how to approach it. A lot of people thought that it was the thing driving the season four conflict, but that doesn't actually seem to be the case because revealing it wasn't part of resolving the season four conflict. Marinette also doesn't seem to have any trauma around Chat Blanc. Instead - somehow - Adrien does even though he doesn't know it happened and I just... what?

At the very least, I think that we can all acknowledge that telling your partner that he ended the world in an alternate timeline that will now never exist and whose cause you do not know has, at best, questionable benefits. The only reason I wanted Marinette to tell him was because I thought that it was affecting her and because, in certain circumstances, telling him could have lead to Gabriel's defeat and I like poetic justice.

But if Chat Blanc isn't affecting Marinette, then telling Chat Noir is kinda pointless since there's nothing that he can do about it as far as she knows. It could even be arguably seen as cruel. I don't think that Marinette needs to tell her partner every awful thing that he does when the akuma of the day controls him because none of it is his fault and he can't change the past. Telling him just feels like guilt tripping. Given canon's wacky writing, a Chat Blanc reveal is just that on a larger scale.

I honestly can't think of anything else we could call an ongoing lie outside of the secret identities and general miraculous stuff. The senti thing is Marinette's first real harmful ongoing lie and it's one that she actively planned, too, since she would have had time to gather her thoughts before she sees Adrien. I truly don't think that it fits her character, especially since Adrien isn't shown to be in mourning.

I'm not saying that this would be an easy thing to tell him, I'm just saying that it really doesn't fit her character to choose to lie. Even if you disagree with my above arguments and say that the scarf and Chat Blanc were setups for this, canon itself has given Marinette an arc about being less controlling.

In season five we have the stuff with Lila where the whole "high road" thing was proven to be a bad call. And, Chat Blanc or not, season four ended with her saying this:

Ladybug: Why don't you just give up on me? I've lost ALL the Miraculous! I'm the worst Guardian EVER! I wanted to control everything, I didn't listen to you, I lied to you, I kept you at a distance! Every time you offered me a helping hand, I never took it! I really made a mess of EVERYTHING! (continues sobbing)

So what was the point of that if she still "tries to control everything"? (Even though I'd argue that she didn't. A lot of this rant isn't actually backed up by what we see happening in season four, but it's still the lesson that the writers chose to have her openly state she learned.)

In summary, Marinette has never been big on lying unless she has to and she's supposedly had an arc about not being controlling, so either this isn't it or she's learned nothing and season four was an even bigger waste of time than I already thought it was.

The Wish Did It

This is arguably the most plausible scenario, but if we go this route, then it's still bad writing because the wish rewrites the universe so there's no way to discover "the truth" because it isn't the truth anymore. Whatever Gabriel changed is now reality and the only way to make that not so is to retcon how the wish works. And if they're reconning that, well, how can you trust anything the show tells you about the lore?

The reason why consistent world building and characterization are so important is because it's the foundation on which stories are built. The puzzle pieces that fit together to create the cohesive whole. If your puzzle pieces don't fit together, then you are telling a story that the audience cannot logically follow and that is generally considered to be objectively bad storytelling unless you're writing literary nonsense like Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. (Yes that's an actual genre.)

In Summary

Like I said at the top, this all just feels like bad writing to me. It's not the natural next chapter in the story. It actively goes against past characterization and supposed character arcs, but that's hardly shocking. Throughout the show, we've seen the writers do whatever the hell they want to make a plot work, ignoring their own lore in the process. I don't expect that to change and neither should you.

The Alya and Lila thing is my go-to example because it's the most glaring indication of what you should expect to see in this show. If a reporter who actively reported that Lila is Ladybug's best friend will not be swayed by learning that Ladybug is someone who actively hates Lila, then it is pointless to try to make sense of the writing. Trying to logically guess where it's going next or what a character is going to do is an exercise in madness because that's not how Miraculous works.

It's why I haven't weighed in on what the wish will mean for season six. The wish will mean whatever the hell the writers decide it means no matter what the previous five seasons contained. It's also why this blog largely focuses on discussing canon's existing flaws and ways that you could potentially fix them. That's the stuff I really enjoy and find value in. Theory crafting only works for media that is logically solid and consistent. Asks like yours are still welcome! Just know that they're going to bring out my most cynical, judgemental side.

#ml writing salt #ml writing critical #ml season 5 salt #marinette deserves better

20 notes · View notes

aether-link · 3 months

Text

Let’s have a sad hc fic of yangvik shall we? (emotions are all over the place and been thinking of this for a few days).

Cw: death, extreme depression, heartbreak syndrome, old age.

First up, I personally have this thought that Raava just genuinely extends the life force of every avatar. (All my homies pour one out for kuruk😔) Compared to their companions who don’t really have that light energy extension. SO…

Yangchen and Kavik are the same age right? They are pushing 100 or around early 100s, Yangchen over time has personally given Kavik days off from avatar duties to be with his family and other tribesmen. Mostly a week too two weeks he has, Kavik mostly goes on hunts that also take majority of that time. By the time he gets back, he always brings back at least a new wound or scar. Yangchen doesn’t really like that, when she finds a scar or a fresh opening somewhere she’s on it, quickly healing it. Though Kavik is mostly riddled by now, she always shakes her head in disapproval though forgives him.

Things start to slow down for Kavik. His health mostly, the sheer stress of the past catching up to him. Duty and fights taking a toll mentally but more physically. A day he goes to set out, preparing for a hunt. He is home with what family he has left, Yangchen is there to (thanks to his mother, Yangchen is always welcomed to his home and family no matter) but this day was different for him. Things felt off, slow, uncomfortable for him. The weirdness of slow breathe, Kavik had to sit down. A few deep inhales until a wave of pain struck him in the chest, clutching himself there. Yangchen flew into action without even speaking a word. She was on it. Supporting his weight while he sits keeling over, using her healing she figured out what was happening to him. A silent heart attack.

Panic set into her, wide eyes. Eyeing Kavik’s face that is now drenched in sweat. Fear now over takes her, her knowledge in the human body is vast, once a person has an attack the rest that follow are more harsh until death, if your lucky.

Yangchen upset spoke with a stern voice at Kavik. Telling him do not go hunting, he is in no condition no more. Only for Kavik give her a smug smile with a look that she knows to well, a look of “I’ll be ok, it’s alright…” but no. Yangchen brows flex, eyes sharp, a frown dawned on her face. Her figure shadowed over him who was still slumped in the seat he took, reality grew on his own face. She was the boss. His life is now in her hands from now on.

Months had past since the attack. Kavik felt less in energy then before, what he would report to Yangchen on the daily on how he felt. It would give so much relief when he was ok. More extra comfort is when they slept together, respectfully. Yangchen would have a routine throughout the night checking Kavik when he sleeps. A hand on his back, chest, then pulse checks on his neck and wrists. To catch anything of the abnormal through out his body. Things seems to be fine until a week later.

Yangchen doing her check ups, half asleep for to be fully awake after discovering that Kavik is silent. A silence that was eerie and deafening. Throughout that night a second silent attack had happened, before her check ups, just her luck. Yangchen is in a horrible mess, scrambling to a lifeless Kavik who slept by her. There where no signs on his face, no signs of stress on the outside, the only evidence she could find was his still heart that felt like it was strangled from the attack that hit hard, feeling it with her water bending. Yangchen now beginning to hyperventilate, mute sobs. Running her hands over his chest trying to bring him back though nothing prevailed. Finally she let it out with a scream that bursted the windows, rattled the doors of the home they lived in. So loud that it made other water tribe members wake and rush too the house, only to find what cause such a scream of horror.

She hasn’t slept in weeks, dark circles under eyes, pale complexion and now underweight. Her solid rock that gave her peace is now gone. Yangchen started separate herself from the world. Started to ignore pleas, asks for help, avatar duties, literally everything. The woe was taking over her day by day, to weeks, to months evolved to years. Chaos was dawning. Even spirits started to break worlds without her interference and cause destruction. People and nations kept at her, everything was too much now. Even Raava that tried her best to ground her was unsuccessful.

Yangchen looked like death itself, a being of no other. Strangely things where going quiet, all the pleas stopping over time that kept falling in deaf ears. Finally she thought to herself, a perfect time to flee and disappear without witnesses. The place she now stays at, the cove in the side of the mountains where no one could see. Yangchen lazily mopes day in and day out. Her depression completely took the wheel of her life now, she could bearly eat anything and when she did, pain. Pain shot through her chest, specially around her heart and lungs. The suddenness made her think rapidly, more attacks? This was something else, she never even felt like this before until now. The pain grew in waves then stopped, it was torment.

The pain and the depression was at its maximum at this point. Yangchen laying against the wall of rock. Hissing the pain out when it struck. Her heart felt like it was tearing apart, it hurt to breath. Raava broke the silence, for a moment Yangchen had forgotten about her, her words where soft and comforting to hear after a while of stress. When Raava spoke, she mentioned something that Yangchen had never heard of when it came to human health. Why didn’t anyone tell her? Why didn’t anyone report such a rare like thing in history.

Broken Heart Syndrome. Valves of the heart ripping apart slowly over time from suffering from extreme depression, stress or grief of a lost loved one. Kavik’s loss affected her so harshly that she never wanted to admit it. But it was true, he was the last being and even thing that gave her joy, happiness, a reason to live another day. Why did she hang on after so long after his passing? Was it self false hope? Perhaps. The pain is back, Raava’s words faded when it became to unbearable. Grunts and gasping for air came from Yangchen, her hands death grip her robes in a fight for life. Things where blurring, sound was getting more and more quiet. Raava spoke more, her final words sounding like a gentle guidance. Yangchen started to realise what was happening to her, to herself. Her last few moments. The gasps sounded horrific to the ear, weakness grew all over. Yangchen’s body gave a last ditch effort, an effort too cry. To let it all out once and for all. For this this life. Soft lights shun around her, just making it out from failing vision until complete darkness. Raava. Saying her goodbyes to this avatar who lays before her motionless and finally at peace, the great air avatar Yangchen.

#yangvik #Yangchen #Kavik #Raava #sorry not sorry 😭#felt like being THAT person today.#sad. suffering. depressing love? yes

18 notes · View notes

theraddestfemalive · 3 months

Text

Y’know what? Fuck it. I’m going to say this

I don’t think any non-gc or tra lib gives a fuck about what im about to say, even considering that im going to tag the cr fandom.

I’m only adding one radfem tag because this post is centered around another topic.

i feel like ever since the trans population has tripled, it hasn’t been the same. Before any of you cucks think im talking about the idea of being trans, im also talking about the community behind it. Their ideas within the concept of it.

the concept of being ‘transgender’ was built on the foundation of sexist stereotypes; although the origins had a different purpose in ancient societies (varying ofcourse), it was ultimately used as a weapon to oppress women in the modern times, the goal was to make a person ‘feel’ like a male or female and now trillions of micro labels and gender identities are used to describe people who feel slightly above the normal and they’re treated as if they’re some kind of clothes that you put on instead of an identity.

Because of this, most people don’t even know what a woman or a lesbian is. They try to replace the definition of something that was exclusive to one sex to cater to the whims of men.

Ever since last year, most my friends that weren’t into that shit now identify as trans and I saw a dramatic shift in their personality. Most if not all of them were autistic women that did not conform of societal standards of what a ‘woman’ is. Some people may argue it’s because of how lightly a transgender identity is perceived. But on my end, I think it also has to do with the lack of representation of quirky female characters in media.

likely I would’ve fit into one of those micro labels or some shit like that but I was lucky enough to discover characters and things that I aligned with so I didn’t have to deal with shitty gender dysphoria (alongside with my very obvious mental issues and me being neurodivergent myself)

When I look at the older cookie run art (2016-2021), or even from eastern countries (eastern countries aren’t really politically correct) I could truly see the characters in the scene. There is passion behind it. The artists are either older or they know what they’re doing. And it doesn’t seem like an overload

when I see newer cookie run ‘fanart’ esp when there’s a lot of people within the western community, I don’t see a lot of what the characters truly are. All I see is their interpretation of what their character would look like if it was an unoriginal copy of a 14 year old gendie’s oc. Alongside with that, they add a thousand headcanons and sexualities, making the character unrecognizable. And if that wasn’t the cherry on top, they’re so obsessed with lgbtq and race stuff (no im not a bigot, don’t even try to fucking label me as one im a bisexual woc ) that’s all what they talk about besides stupid discourse topics. Oh, and also changing a dough color is ‘racist’ (they’re fucking COOKIES. Their dough color was based off of their ingredients and complimentary colors, even the devs had to explain and yet the western community still bitches about it like whiny 5 year olds. They come in all colors, not just fucking skintones.)

I think the characters and ships of the community would be much more likable for me if it wasn’t infiltrated by the discourse gang.

I think instead of giving drugs and cosmetic surgery to children, we should get deeper into the psychology of why there’s a lot of trans people on the rise. Don’t you think it’s weird that it has to be an ‘urgency’ to get surgery or children will kts? Maybe instead of thinking it as a life or death situation, think of how most of these people are mentally ill compared to the other lgbtq demographics.

I probably sound like a fucking dick here and im going to get a lot of hateful notes and messages, but honestly.. idgaf

Before you water this down to ‘trans people bad’ im just highlighting the problems of their community and its immense effect on teens my age (13-15 age range im not telling you) before dickriding the movement, I think *again* we should get deeper into the psychology of these people, thank you for reading.

maybe one or two people know who i am because of the image i will show below, who cares lol

i will block if I receive any threats :)))

15 notes · View notes

violet-shadows · 2 years

Text

Missing Piece (Part Nine)

Series Index | Masterlist

Summary: Cassian and Nesta are happily mated and in love, so why do they feel like something is missing? When a newcomer arrives in the City of Starlight, they learn that their bond is not yet complete.

Pairing: Cassian x Nesta x Reader (She/Her) (Poly Relationship)

Word Count: 3.0k

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

I didn’t see Nesta again for three days after we kissed, and I was growing more nervous by the hour. Cassian walked me home each day, assuring me that Nesta was just working some things out in her mind, but my confidence diminished each day I walked outside to find him alone. He insisted that it was Nesta’s own demons rearing their head, but it was hard not to take it as a rejection. On the third day of walking me home alone, Cassian diverted us to a cafe on the Sidra for dinner. Whether he could sense my anxiety regarding Nesta or simply had impeccable timing, I wasn’t sure, but once we were seated in an isolated corner of the pavilion, he began to speak. “I wanted to talk to you… about Nesta.” I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat as my mind began to spin up possibilities.

“It took me a long time to understand her,” he said, looking out over the water, “longer than it should have. She closes off when she gets scared… puts up walls to keep people at arm's length. I thought it was about me, at first, that she pushed me away because I was a bastard and a brute, but it’s not...”

“She doesn’t want to get hurt,” I surmised, so familiar with the feeling that it made my eyes sting with tears.

“In part, yes,” Cassian nodded, eyes boring into mine. “But she also doesn’t want to hurt anyone. I think that’s what scares her the most: letting someone get close and then hurting them, by accident.”

“She wouldn’t—” I began, feeling defensive of my mate.

“I know,” he assured, giving a small, sad smile. “She doesn’t, though. It’s hard, once you’ve seen yourself as a monster, to ever see anything else.”

“Have you?” I asked, keeping my voice low. “Seen yourself as a monster?”

“I was raised to be one. I’ve been one before,” he replied, drawing a deep breath. He folded his hands in front of him on the table, a distant look in his eyes. “In the camps, you’re the hunter or you’re the prey, especially without a title or bloodline to back you up. If Rhys’s mother hadn’t taken me under her wing... if I hadn’t known family through them… I don’t know what I might have been.”

“You’re the furthest things from a monster,” I whispered, reaching out to grab his hand.

“I can be, though,” he rebutted, “but I’m not… not always. Nesta helps me remember that.”

“You two understand each other,” I murmured. I thought back to the long, shared looks I had witnessed between them, of the way they moved and breathed in sync, and I couldn’t but feel a bit like an outsider. Could I ever grow to know them the way that they knew each other?

“I got lucky, in that sense,” he replied. “When we found you… when it clicked, we were both afraid you’d outright reject us. I think, perhaps, Nesta still is. Perhaps we both are…” He said the last bit quietly, as if he were speaking to himself, and seemed to regret it almost immediately. “I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have said that. We agreed not to pressure you.”

“Pressure me?” I inquired.

“About accepting the bond,” he clarified. “We didn’t want you to feel obligated… like you had no choice. We still don’t.”

“And here I was afraid you two would reject me,” I replied.

“Reject you?” Cassian seemed surprised at the notion, his eyebrows shooting up. “Why would we reject you?” He said it as if the concept were preposterous and my heart squeezed, hope blooming within me.

“You really can’t see it? The most legendary General Prythian has ever seen and the Made Valkyrie who beheaded the King of Hybern are mates to a random healer from the Winter Court. I can’t exactly… measure up to that. Comparatively, I’m nobody.”

“Don’t say that. You’re not a nobody,” Cassian gave my hand a gentle squeeze, his eyes burning with intensity. “Regardless, Nesta and I don’t care about status or power. You’re good, through and through. That’s what matters.”

“The two of you seem so well matched… so in love… I’m afraid there won’t be a place for me,” I cringed as I said it, looking down at our intertwined hand. I wasn’t sure what had prompted this vulnerability, but once I was spilling truths to him, I didn’t want to stop.

“There is a place for you. I can feel it. We can feel it. We’ve known since long before we met you, that there was something else, someone else for us,” he leaned forward across the table, brushing his hand across my chin to make me look at him. “I need you to know that any hesitation you might have picked up on has nothing to do with you. I think it’s just… different with you. You’re kind… and good… it’s frightening to think that we might wreck that.”

“You’re kind and good too, Cassian. You both are,” I said quietly, swallowing a lump in my throat, “I can feel it.”

“Thank you, Y/N,” he said, breathing out a deep sigh. “If you can give Nesta a bit more time, I think she’ll come to agree with you.”

“I can wait for her. For both of you.”

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

Upon dropping me off at home, Cassian informed me that he had a meeting the following afternoon, but offered to send someone else to walk me home. I already made plans to have dinner with Elise and Ezran, so I declined, assuring him that one or both of them would walk me home afterward. He had hugged me again before we parted, placing a gentle kiss on the top of my head, and I could swear that stepping out of his embrace drew physical pain. As I lay in bed that night, wide awake with Cassian’s scent still lingering on my clothes, I thought of my mates unendingly. Keeping them at arm's length, and not getting emotionally invested, was a moot point by now, and I hoped beyond hope that Cassian was correct in his assessment of our dynamic. I couldn’t stomach the thought of rejection, not now that I had bared so much of my soul to them both.

The next day came and went without incident, my thoughts far away as I went about my duties. My final patient of the evening was a young Fae with a tricky laceration to his hand, and I stayed nearly an hour later than anticipated ensuring the sutures were perfect. Ezran and Elise were long gone by the time I finishes, so I rushed to get to Elise’s house by myself. Upon arriving, I knocked on her front door, waited a few moments, then knocked again. When she didn’t answer, I decided to let myself in, figuring she and Ezran were probably upstairs in the kitchen, unable to hear me.

When I reached the top of the steps, I gave a yelp of surprise and quickly shut my eyes and smacked my hand over my face. Elise and Ezran were indeed in the kitchen, but their state was entirely unexpected. They were locked in an embrace, lips pressed together, with Elise’s dress halfway unlaced in the back. I could hear them scrambling to jump apart, but kept my hand firmly over my eyes, not wanting to see my friends in states of undress.

“Oh Cauldron! Sorry, Y/N, we… uh… got caught up. Forgot you were coming.” I could picture Elise’s face as she spoke, blushing crimson with embarrassment. “Just give us a minute and…”

“That’s okay!” I squeaked, “I’ll leave you two be, I don’t want to interrupt.”

“Really, it’s fine,” Ezran began, but I shook my head, feeling for the stair rail so I could retreat. The idea of spending the evening as a third wheel, pretending I hadn’t walked in on them, was less than appealing.

“I had a long day, you just… enjoy your night,” I stifled my laughter until I was all the way out of Elise’s apartment, already making note of how I would tease the two later. I had suspected some chemistry between them since we first arrived in Velaris, but I certainly hadn’t expected things to progress so quickly. They were a good match, though, both healers of similar social classes, with uncomplicated pasts and bright futures. In contrast to my own situation, it seemed rather simple for them to get together. I tried not to get hung up on childish envy.

I was halfway home by the time the sun began to set, the streets emptying as people went inside for dinner. As I rounded the corner to a particularly empty corridor, the hair on the back of my neck stood up. A few meters ahead was a group of males having a rowdy conversation on a pub stoop. I could see drinks in their hands, and from the way they were swaying, I knew these weren’t their first of the night. I ducked my head as I passed, hoping to go unnoticed, but just as I thought I was free of them, a hand hooked onto my upper arm. I gasped and whirled around to see a grinning, glassy-eyed stranger clutching my arm. “Why don’t you stop and have a drink with us?” he slurred. I tried to pull away, but his grip remained firm. Behind him, another male, one of his friends, was approaching us. For a moment I thought he might mean to come to my defense, but when I saw his face, my heart dropped.

Even years later, I recognized him immediately. Blonde hair, a long straight nose, and a predatory glint in his eyes, as if he was amused at the sight of fear. The first time I saw him was when Amarantha’s soldiers arrived in Winter to declare the new law of the land. The last time I saw him was several years later, when he ran my father through with a broadsword and then dragged my mother away in shackles. I didn’t know his name, but I had memorized his features, revisiting them in my nightmares where I watched him rip my family to pieces, a sick smirk on his face. I would recognize him anywhere. “C’mon, doll. Come have a good time with us.”

“You,” I gasped and I ripped my arm free of the other male, stumbling backward as the world seemed to tilt on its axis. I had fantasized many times about what I would do if I ever saw him again, imagining how I might leap upon him and pluck out his eyes, fueled by rage and grief. Now, with the male I hated most in the world standing before me, I instead wanted nothing more than to run. Despite my mounting fear, I remained frozen, as if shackled to the ground by his mere presence. Something shifted in his expression as he looked at me, displaying vague recognition that made my stomach roll.

“I know you from somewhere,” he said, stepping towards me. My heart thundered in my chest, my plans for vengeance forgotten as the reality of the situation set in. I was gravely outmatched by him, let alone with his friends nearby. I picked up my skirt, preparing to turn heel and run when a large, dark shape appeared in front of me. The males before me were blocked from view by a pair of large, leathery wings. For a moment, I thought Cassian might have come to my aid, but the dark whisps of shadow swirling around the person’s hands gave away their identity.

Azriel. The Shadowsinger.

I had never been so relieved to see someone with such a terrifying reputation. “Is there a problem here?” he asked the males, his voice low and deadly. I peeked around his wing to see the group had gone still, all traces of merriment extinguished. The other males on the stoop began to retreat while the other two remained rooted in place.

“We were just inviting the lady for a drink,” the first male explained, a slight waver in his voice. It was a far cry from his earlier demeanor.

“Didn’t look like she was interested,” Azriel replied, his voice unnervingly steady. He turned around, looking me up and down in a clinical manner before asking, “Did they hurt you at all?” I shook my head, shock stealing my voice, nd Azriel looked me over one more time before he turned back to the males. I was too distracted to hear the rest of the conversation, my mind stuck in a loop of grisly memories and unbridled fear. I didn’t notice the males leave or Azriel turn to me again until a gentle hand rested on my shoulder. “Y/N?”

“What?”, I looked up, struggling to focus on anything when the world felt like it was spinning.

“I said ‘are you alright?' You’re shaking,” Azriel asked again, his demeanor softening slightly. I opened my mouth to respond, to assure him I was physically unharmed, but my throat tightened and I was cut off by a choked sob. I buried my face in my hands, embarrassed to cry in front of a near stranger but unable to stop myself. “I’ll get you home,” Azriel murmured, sweeping me into his arms. I kept my eyes closed during the short flight, determined to catch my breath and calm down so I could explain myself. We landed in front of my building and Azriel gently herded me up the steps, taking the key from my trembling hands to unlock the door. “

“What happened? What did those males do?” he asked urgently once we were in private. I fought to catch my breath, the tears seemingly endless, and he crouched in front of me. “It’s okay, you’re safe. Take deep breaths.”

I never would have imagined being comforted by the Spymaster of the Night Court, but the male was surprisingly good at calming me down. After a minute, I drew a steadying breath, finally able to speak.

“That male,” I began, wrapping my arms around myself, “the blonde one. I know him. H-he worked for Amarantha. He k-killed my father.” My voice broke on the last syllable and I shuttered, the image of my father’s bloodless corpse flashing behind my eyelids.

“Are you sure?” he asked. “Most of Amarantha’s people have been hunted down.” I knew the odds of one of her captains making his way to Velaris were slim, and the more I thought about it, the more I questioned myself. The lighting was poor and the memories old, and I was hesitant to condemn the wrong male, lecherous as he and his ilk were.

“I’m… almost certain,” I replied. Azriel nodded, moving to stand.

“I’ll look into it, you have my word. If he is the same male, there will be consequences. I’ll be having a longer… conversation with all of them, regardless, about harassing females in the streets.” Something told me he intended to do more than talk with the group, but I didn’t have it in me to ask. “Do you want me to bring you to the House?”

I shook my head, wanting to be alone while I processed my grief. Just as he was moving to leave, I remembered to ask about one key detail of the evening’s events. “Azriel? How did you find me?”

“Nesta asked me to make sure you got home safe. You left your friend's house earlier than I expected, so I was out looking,” he said with a shrug.

“Oh… Nesta did?” I asked, somewhat surprised. Seeing as it was Cassian who made it his mission to walk me home each day, I figured it would be him to make the request.

“Nesta is… protective of the people she cares about,” he explained, the corner of his mouth twitching.

“Well, thank you, for coming to the rescue,” I replied, replaying his words in my mind.

“Anytime,” he nodded, moving towards the door. “Lock this behind me and stay in tonight, okay? I’ll send Cassian and Nesta your way.”

I considered telling him not to bother them, that I could sort out my emotions on my own, but I found myself wanting nothing more than my mates at my side. So instead, I thanked him and deadbolted the door behind him.

I lay in bed after Azriel left, replaying the moment of my father’s death and comparing his executioner to the man I had just encountered. In my mind’s eye, the two were nearly identical, but I knew the brain could play tricks on you, especially where trauma was involved. I wondered what Azriel would find in his investigation, and felt embarrassed at the thought that I might have lost my cool over a mere doppelganger.

After an hour or so of wallowing, there was a knock at my door. I all but leapt from bed at the sound of it, anticipating Cassian or Nesta or, preferably, both on the other side. Perhaps it was because I was tired, or maybe it was the ache in my heart drowning out all reason, but I didn’t check the peephole before I swung the door open. The figure on the other side was tall and broad-shouldered, but he lacked the exceptional height and trademark wings of my mate. I froze, squinting to see his face in the low firelight, and then my blood ran cold.

“Remember me?” asked the male who killed my father.

⊱ —————— ❈ —————— ⊰

Likes, reblogs, comments, and feedback are greatly appreciated. Click here to check out my other work.

Taglist - All ACOTAR Fics (Part One): @answer-the-sirens @microwaveallthedemons @judig92 @wolfyland07 @donttellthecats @goldentournesol @mulansaucey @starlit-terror @starrstrucked @bankerfrog @xxoverthinkxx @luv-xoxo @abrunettefangirlnerd @smellys-cats @crazymar15 @feyretopia @we-were-beautiful @simplywitchy @milllionthingsihaventdone @sevikas-whore @lunaralaraspace @sfhsgrad-blog @lucyysthings @debramclaren @powerfulpantera @blurredlamplight @nightscourtt @disneyandkpoplover @linduzmunna @shadowhunterfangirlforlife @shadowcrowsworld @nightcourtwritings @thefandomswhre @high-bi-andreadytocry @percyjacksonspeen @tayrae515 @a-little-disguised @itendswithussadness @strawbwebbie @hopelesslyuncreative @cityofidek @hopelesslyuncreative @5moremin @meritxellao @shadowdreamur @orangecreamsicle54 @bubnix @a-mexican-waffle @maddistyles17

✨CLICK HERE TO BE ADDED TO MY TAGLIST✨

#cassian x reader #nesta x reader #nessian x reader #cassian x you #nesta x you #nessian x you #poly!nessian #acotar #nessian #acotar fanfic #ff #my stuff

354 notes · View notes