#AND BONUS GUY HENRY IN THE BACKGROUND

[backjustforberena]

EVE BEST as  VANESSA BELL  in “Life In Squares” - thanks to @evebestonline for the footage.

[welivetodream]

Re-read TSH.....AGAIN

Here are some weird/wtf/sad moments and details I had forgotten:

•Henry wrote a diary entry about murdering a guy 🤨.

•then forgets that Bunny is capable enough to translate the diary entries and find out about the murder.

•Richard has a random thought about r-wording Camilla out of nowhere (*What the fuck Richard vine plays in the background*) 😳.

•The first time Richard sees the twins he thinks they are a couple..........hmm (I was sus about that from the start) 😶.

•Richard had two pages of internal monologue about Henry being gay.

•There was broken stuff in the twins dorm, which was due to Charles trashing the house whenever he is mad at Camilla (FUCK CHARLES).

•Franics was making passes at Richard multiple times.

•Francis and Camilla kissed for some reason, twice.

•Richard only studied greek before to have a language class that's in the afternoon so he could sleep late in the morning (sometimes I feel like he survives only on pure instinct).

•Richard was constantly finassing his employer.

•Henry and Charles were ready to throw hands at Judy (do NOT touch the queen you freaks).

•Henry planned multiple murder options for Bunny (💫dumb ways to die💫).

•Richard had no problem being an accomplice in murder for people he barely knows.

•Bunny drops multiple hints about the murder the others did early on.

•Nobody tried to save Camilla way before if they knew Charles's controlling nature (Henry taking her away was the best thing he ever did).

•Camilla and Henry had secret telephone codes.

•Francis was forced to have a lavender marriage 😭.

•all of this shit went down during one academic year.

•Camilla's whole purpose was to give storylines to Henry, Charles and Richard. She deserved so much better than that. And I don't want her to ever stay around any of the guys of the group (except for Francis).

•Julian was blissfully aware of the obsessive nature of his students, and not only encouraged it but directly lit the fire that caused them to become who they are. (He tried to pull a John Keating from DPS, but he could NEVER be the Dark Academia teacher icon)

BONUS:

Tally of the members of the greek gang who have kissed eachother (NOT COUNTING THE BACCHANAL, where they all fucked.....Idk what happens in a bacchanal, I am too scared to research)

Camilla: 4 (Henry, Francis, Charles, Richard)

Francis: 3 (Charles, Camilla, Richard)

Richard: 2 (Francis, Camilla)

Charles: 2 (Francis, Camilla)

Henry: 1 (Camilla)

Bunny: 0 (RIP, I guess 😅)

[rockyroadkylers]

HI, IT'S BEEN A COUPLE WEEKS!!! But I was tagged by literally six people (thank you to @anincompletelist, @happiness-of-the-pursuit, @songliili, @ssmtskw, @littlemisskittentoes, and @hgejfmw-hgejhsf) so I guess the universe wants me to post today!

I do actually have a little snippet to share this week - I started a new WIP (just a small one this time!!!! just a oneshot, I promise!!!) inspired by a screenshot someone shared in the Brownstone server that I'll add to the end of the post so you guys can see it, too. And, bonus - the first three paragraphs I've managed to write so far happen to total up to exactly seven sentences!

There’s an advert about a block from Henry’s flat that he walks past every day on his morning walk to the cafe with David. It’s just a cologne ad, but Henry will be disproportionately upset when it inevitably gets replaced with something different. It’s a fairly simple ad – a deep red background, the name of the cologne and the logo for the brand taking up one side. On the other side, instead of an image of the bottle, there’s a photograph of possibly the most gorgeous man Henry has ever seen; tan skin, effortlessly messy curls that he’s sure took hours to style, a smile that makes his heart skip a beat every time he sees it, with a boyish sort of charm. What really draws Henry’s attention, though, are the man’s eyes – deep brown, framed by long, curly lashes. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen eyelashes that long on a man. Oftentimes, when he passes by the ad on his way to the cafe, he finds himself pausing to look for a moment or two, wondering if they’ve been photoshopped… until he’s snapped out of his thoughts by David tugging on his lead, wanting to get a move on.

(YES, it's an AU where Henry is living out his dream of being a writer living in Paris, and Alex is the model he was joking about being in this dream scenario.)

no-pressure tags (might be shorter than usual, because most of the people I usually tag have already tagged me 😂): @inexplicablymine, @read-and-write-, @affectionatelyrs, @msmarvelouswinchester, @firenati0n, and anyone else who feels like it!

And the screenshot this fic was inspired by under the cut:

[hellkitepriest]

if everything everything were to cover a dutch uncles song which would you like for it to be/do you think would make the most sense. and same vice versa. and should members cross over between bands to make this happen

look i know i say this every time but this is an EXCELLENT question. much to think about......... POINT NUMERO UNO: i really want to watch alex robertshaw play the marimba, actually, now you've put the thought in my head. truly the anti-panto pete. i want them to do threads and for jon and alex to do the marimba thing together POINT NUMERO DOS: i think jeremy could do a lot with the big balloon bass riff. sexually speaking. POINT NUMERO TRES: babymaking. my actual answer i think might be poppin' because it's funky and it's fun and also i want jez and alex to yell READ MY MUPPET LIPS real loud. bonus points if someone constructs a muppet-jon and puppeteers him from just behind jez's amp

and vice versa: duncan 'sounds like he's about to cry on 90% of true entertainment' wallis could do a Lot with in birdsong but i fear there wouldn't be enough for the rest of em to do. i'm gonna say my computer because that's one that ee Don't do live and i AM mad about it and also. i just think

also: pete sené and henry broadhead as the two Background Guys of the bands swap places and nobody acknowledges it. thank you for coming to my ted talk

(i want to hear your answers to this OBVIOUSLY please i feel like you'll have thought about this a lot) (i also want to hear @qwertyfingers answers to this if he feels like it, as one of the only other Both Bands Likers)

[o0anapher0o]

So I’ve mostly been lurking in the rwrb fandom but I’ve seen some discussions about what the sequel could look like so I thought I’d throw in my two cents:

Cold open with the proposal.  Dealer’s choice who, how and where (Paris seems an obvious choice, but also, well, rather obvious, dare I say a bit on the nose). Bonus points if Nora, Pez and/or Bea are somehow involved.

General background for the film would be Alex and Henry’s big fat royal wedding (I know in the book Henry left the royal family but from a narrative pov that would be wasting so much material). The wrinkled white racists at Buckingham Palace obviously come up with the most absurd obstacles and demands giving the boys plenty of opportunities to be adorably mutually supportive and cute. Or bang out their frustration.

One plot line could involve Alex getting princess diaried and finally being forced into those desperately needed etiquette lessons.  I imagine Shaan is heavily,  long-sufferingly involved (Zarah sends some very creative threats should Alex damage her boyfriend). Alex, of course, fights tooth and nail against any bit of royal protocol the point of which cannot be explained to him by anything other that ' that’s how we do it‘. Because is not a good enough reason for him to do stupid stuff. As a fellow English lit major I have a strong need for Henry to remind his grandfather that 'great customs curtesy to great kings' and maybe the royal protocols need some updates (they really, really do) and if the king can’t change then then who can?

Another plot line could centre around Philipp noticing that Henry is feeling some kind of way about certain people on the guest list. The 'I had my first time with one of my big brother’s friends when I was 17‘ bit wasn’t in the movie, but given we’ve only heard a fraction of those 72 emails it wouldn’t be a stretch to say it was in there. Pip could regain some of Alex's and Bea's trust as they work together to find out who took advantage of Henry (they eventually realise the person to ask is obviously Pez, but getting him to spil takes some convincing).  Philipp concludes his redemption arc in the grand finale of the film by punching the guy at the reception, causing a major scandal at his brother’s wedding thus making them even. Alex and Pez shameless cheer, Henry is surprised but very touched.

And then they lived happily ever after (until part 3)

[crimeronan]

is 11 for the ask game your three favorite fics you've written, or your favorite three as a reader? well, do whichever one you like! or both. or neither. i'm not the boss of you.

from this ask game!

i'll do both!

for ones i've written:

breathe on the ashes - 106k heart project about the homestuck ancestors. it's about fighting fate and failing and being doomed and dying. also revolutionary martyrs and eldritch gods. i completed it 5 years ago now and would do some things differently today, but there are parts of it that are still.... some of my best writing. like, ever.

we never were good at doing what we're told - 113k heart project that's a soulmate AU written by someone who fucking hates soulmate AUs. mainly about the three narrators navigating their "soulmates as horror" lots in life with polyamory in the background. tons of vicious relationship fights, ugliness, snuggles, and face touching. it's also perhaps the most personal fic about suicide, bipolar disorder, psychosis that i've ever written.

why did love put a gun in my hand - the luz POV princess fic. i've worked harder on wwaitsoatl and my writing in that fic is better, but this one edges it out for my favorite. there's a lot of horror and characterization stuff in here that i'm really pleased with, even moreso than the character stuff i've explored in more canon compliant fic.

-

for ones i've read:

you're a far cry from an empire at peace - yes i know i rec this one Every Time but for good reason. a fic set in the toh princess AU that's about willow as eda's weed-smoking burnout apprentice. she is fucking perfect and the political stuff in here is SOOO GOOOOODDDD

meet hennessy - a gorgeous, evocative, breathtaking character study of hennessy from call down the hawk. it's ugly and raw and really really really fucking good. also worth noting that as far as i remember, this was the first piece of hennessy fanfiction published to ao3 that i didn't write myself. and it DELIVEREDDDDD.

and these are the days that make a forever - ADORABLE raven cycle ot6 polyamory fic about ronan navigating how to come out as gay and polyamorous to his shithead older brother. it is fucking hilarious and always good for a bad day.

bonus because i couldn't decide between ^ that one and:

Spirit and Tongue - another raven cycle fic, this one for the rarepairs of adam/henry and adam/gansey/henry. an AU where adam and henry are fae from opposing courts, and both are fighting for gansey's attention. gansey is a fae-touched human who's clever and sweet and is gonna earn these guys' affection if it kills him. So Fucking Good.

[wannabe-cartoonist-blog]

Some stills from my newest Hetalia animatic "Defying Gravity".

I went off a bit here, so check explanations/historical references below cut.

1: An alternate version of the empires America looks up to. Most of it gets covered up in the animatic (and they don't have eyeballs) but I ended up really liking this drawing so I wanted to post the full version of it here. Fun fact: I simply named this image file "men". They sure are.

2: Loved making the little England and America portrait and coloring to make it look more like a painting. I imagine England's pretty sentimental and has lots of portraits and sketches of his kids/important people (see point 4). I also enjoyed showing America's conflict here. Alfred will always have a certain fondness and desire for respect from his father, but at the same time, fuck that guy! "I'm gonna be my own person and not a crown jewel in your empire. It's not a phase, dad!"

3: There's too many Canada and America scenes for me to highlight, but I think that though they have their issues as Canada and America, Matthew and Alfred are still ultimately brothers and care about each other. Also, peep those flowers in the back. Wonder what that's referencing...

4: England's office over in the Colonies. Even though he's not here much, I imagine its quite eclectic. Colonial America probably liked to break in from time to time too to look at all the stuff England's horded/pillaged gathered over the years from around the world, despite England locking it when he's away. The portraits get covered up in the video, so I thought I'd give a more detailed look here. Obviously, the portraits are sorta abstract, but I did have certain people in mind when drawing them! Blue portrait: Charles the 2nd famous for the the Restoration (cue King of Bling from Horrible Histories). Green portrait: a vague King Arthur. Orange: Henry the 8th and one of his wives, probably. Purple: Queen Anne. Framed on desk: a baby America circa Jamestown (left) and a young Canada (right) circa 1763 (Treaty of Paris, when England officially acquired Canada from France).

Bonus: When you gotta tell your boss/national personification his son just stole a horse and ran off. British guards One and Two earned a special place in my heart when I drew them in the background like this in one frame. They done fucked up.

[cha-melodius]

OMG I remembered I have another ask for you: I can’t seem to find The Man from Uncle to watch in the UK, which is a shame bc I want to read your fics about it and also Henry Cavill gets me all 🫠 ever since he wore a henley on Superman. So, here’s my question: tell me a little bit about it? A little backstory on Napollya (iirc from your posts 😂) so that maybe I can just enjoy the fics? Pretty please? x

Back in action for asks! *cracks knuckles*

I would love to give you some backstory! (Also, if any of my TMFU folks are reading this and know where to stream it in the UK, please chime in!)

The good news is that for a lot of my AUs you probably don't need a huge amount of the background to appreciate the dynamic. It's a pretty classic enemies to friends to lovers setup, with the added bonus that (in the movie) they are actually true enemies rather than just people who dislike each other haha. I am going to put the rest of this behind a cut—no major spoilers for the movie, but it's gonna get long lol. So if anyone else also wants a character rundown + some important stuff about their dynamic so they can dive into some of my other fics, here's your primer!

Ok, so character rundown:

Napoleon Solo: aka "Cowboy," aka "The CIA's finest", formerly a top tier art thief who no one could catch, until he finally tripped up and got arrested. The CIA plucked him out of prison to work for them, and his handler still treats him like criminal dirt. Enjoys fancy cooking, classic yet fashionable suits, is utterly charming, a massive flirt, supposed to be the 'womanizer' but consistently shows a refreshing respect for women (especially given the James Bond comparison).

Illya Kuryakin: aka "Peril", aka "The youngest person to join the KGB", a giant (6'5"), inhumanly strong, super hostile and gruff exterior, surprisingly bad liar, polite king to little old ladies, actually softer than a marshmallow on the inside. His father was a Soviet official who got thrown in the gulag when he was a kid for embezzlement, forcing his mother into a kind of prostitution to survive. Probably resulting from that trauma, he suffers from dissociative episodes when he gets extremely upset in which he does things like trashes hotel rooms (his hands shake when he feels one coming on). Manipulated by his handler with threats of being sent to the gulag like his father. Favors turtlenecks and simple outfits, also a fashion snob. Extremely attached to his father's watch, which he wears.

Gaby Teller: aka "Chop Shop Girl", East German auto mechanic who's father was a nuclear scientist pulled out of Germany by the Americans during the war, leaving her behind as a kid. No-nonsense, prefers slacks when dressing herself, sometimes plays mother to our bickering boys. Possible alcohol problems.

Alexander Waverly: British Naval Intelligence, ultimately organizing the operation, a bit of an asshole but in a charming way, keeps together the team at the end as UNCLE (independent spy organization).

Victoria Vinciguerra: The evil mastermind. Napoleon sleeps with her at one point to save the operation, later she drugs him and leaves him to be tortured. Very tall, very fashionable.

Also other minor character you may come across in AUs: Oleg (Illya's KGB handler), Sanders (Napoleon's CIA handler), Alexander Vinciguerra (Victoria's husband), Rudi Teller (Gaby's Nazi uncle).

The main thrust of the movie is that Napoleon and Illya are both sent to East Berlin to try to extract Gaby for their own purposes, only to learn that they will actually be force to work as a team to take down the bad guys. They actively try to kill each other in not just their first but also second meeting. There's a scene where they argue over fashion while buying Gaby a new wardrobe that is *chef's kiss*. Extreme levels of banter and snark in every interaction. BUT, as these things go, they gain a grudging respect for each other. Napoleon saves Illya's life, Illya saves Napoleon's life. They work together as a team exceptionally well. By the end, they are trading extremely fond insults. There are moments of self-sacrificial plays to save a teammate you're not even supposed to like, gift giving, betraying your principles/agency for the other person. There is a canonical will-they-won't they between Illya and Gaby during the movie (one of the reasons another major ship in this fandom is an ot3 between them), but nothing actually happens.

I think that basically sums up their dynamic and gives you the backstory you'd need for the AUs especially. For the post-canon ones it's a little tricker since I'd rather not give away the main twist of the movie, BUT a lot of them are kind of "in the future working as a team already" setup that don't really reference movie events, so you'd honestly probably be fine there too.

All right, that's a lot of text lol. I hope it helps, and I hope you enjoy the fics if you decide to dive in!

[cringelordofchaos]

Ok new rp blog list (in order of introduction (I think)) (if "•" is written next to it that means it's mine because I'm a self centered prick)

Already made:

Jake: jake--sterling

Drew: drewybear

Henry: lettuce-my-love

Liam: wh0sliam

Hailey: hailey-i-guess •

Zander: zander-wickham

Sadie: xjaded-sadiex • (tw: eye contact in pfp + banner)

Daisy: x-daisy-x •

Milly: x-pink-haired-devil-x

Sean: mr-broom •

Luke: luke-tmfrp / luke-peterson-tmf

Zoey: zoeyhoeyisalive

Lia: lia-tmf-rp

Elliot: xx0blooming-orchid0xx •

Maria: maria-r0b0tn1k-ark

Stacy: lukepleasenoticeme

Bethany: bethieboo

Milo: the-sigma-milo

Background-chan: background-bg-chan •

Tomato-san: tomato-san-tmf

Max: grandpamaximusivofancynameiii

Yet to be made:

All the teachers

Al the parents

Mia + Willow

Jakes former bullies

Lettuce-chan

Any other background character (like the violinist or misc other background lesbians besides miallow)

Oreo

ROSYCLOZY??

.LUNI?

Damien

The third guy in Max's friend group Jamie

Bonus: all other TMF gimmick (?) blogs I'm currently aware of (ok confession: I have no idea what gimmick actually means because I'm an idiot)

tmf-confessions

tmf-heritage-posts

freakblr-lore •

tmf-gimmicks-maybe

Please inform me of anything I might have missed!

[sotwk]

hey! i know you've probably answered some of this before, but which of your OCs is your favorite- whether your favorite to write, or to imagine headcanons for, or which has the character design/background you're most proud of or most looking forward to writing more of in the future?

Hello Anon! (Whether you're the same Anon who has asked me the other questions about my OCs or a new Anon altogether--I love you!)

I did answer a somewhat similar ask a while back where I babbled on about how I wish I had more courage to write and post stuff about Queen Maereth, my Elvenqueen, beloved Mother of the awesome Princes. She has a TON of history I meticulously interwove with Tolkien canon that I have written down only in notes. Alas, I am so terribly gun-shy about sharing them and I hope that, with a bit more encouragement from Readers (like you!), this will change soon.

But below the cut I will answer YOUR awesome question:

Favorite to write, or to imagine headcanons for: I genuinely cannot choose amongst the four OC princes which one I enjoy creating for because I can honestly say they inspire and excite me equally. What's so fun is that they're all different from each other, with their one common quality being they're all such GOOD GUYS. When I think of ideas for the 5 brothers (favorite food? hobbies? kissing style??), I go across the board, so they all have equal amounts of HC information in my notes.

Character design/background you're most proud of: Character design-wise, not necessarily most proud of, but I will admit Crown Prince Mirion is my favorite, purely as a matter of personal taste. I subconsciously based a lot of his characteristics on Hector of Troy, who is for me THE ultimate hero prince. Plus I gave him Henry Cavill (most beautiful man alive imho) for his face claim, so yeah--I kind of just created my ideal blorbo in this character.

Most looking forward to writing more of: AH! So the funny thing I was just telling my friend @achromaticerebus earlier is, some Readers have commented on which of the OC Thranduilions they like best, and no one has yet chosen Prince Turhir as their favorite. I am not at all offended by this (neither would Turhir really; he could care less about being popular), but I do find it amusing since Turhir is the most like Thranduil in both personality and interests. Everything I have written so far about Turhir shows him as a hardened warrior who's colder than his brothers, so I look forward to showing the softer (in)side that's actually pretty sexy. I think he's the type of person you just need to get to know before you fall head-over-heels for them. Did I mention his face claim is Sam Heughan, Jamie from Outlander?

Bonus writer secret!

I have been toying around with ideas for a possible (possible only, cannot stress that enough, I am afraid to promise anything, lol!) multi-chapter story that places a female OC or Reader in "Golden Age" Woodland Realm, where the lucky lady gets to hang out with the entire Royal Family and their household. Turhir is my top choice to be the leading prince in this story and the potential romantic interest.

Interested in SotWK content?

Introduction to SotWK

My Headcanon Masterlist 

My Fanfiction Masterlist

[emma-m-black]

Sister Kent - Bonus Short Chapter

Ted Lasso/OC (Roy Kent's Little Sister) (FanFiction) - PG

Takes place in season one, the night the Roy goes to Ted's flat and talks to him (and gets offered peanut butter). Ted and Roy's little sister hit it off.

This is a rough draft as always and I wrote this to be 4 chapters. Hope you enjoy.

Here is just a little bonus thinger I wrote :)

Author Master List

Read Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four

CHAPTER FIVE: Season Two (Bonus)

Juliet smiled into the camera. “Are you excited about the game today, Henry?” The young woman was sitting on her couch, her legs tucked underneath her. A blanket was wrapped around her and she had a steaming cup of coffee sat next to her on the couch's side table.

“Yeah, I am,” Came Henry’s reply, his face smiling widely on the screen in Juliet’s hand. “Don’t tell dad though, but I really hope we win today. You guys didn’t get a trophy so, I would like to win one for him to take home.”

“I think he would really like that. But, you know...”

“It isn’t about the wins or losses.” Henry said with a roll of his eyes.

Juliet let out a laugh. “Well, that is true. I was gonna say if he brings back a trophy I might have to steal it and put it my office. I never won any trophies before.”

“Okay, bag is packed Henry.” Came the off camera voice of Ted. “My turn with Juliet.”

“Bye Juliet! Can’t wait to see you in October.” Then Henry was gone, the image on the screen going slightly blurry and the background changing until it settled on the smiling face of Ted.

“Will you record Henry’s game for me? I’d like to watch it when you get back here.”

Ted blinked a few times, and then a smile grew on his lips. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

“Of course, and just to be clear, I’m not joking when Henry wins that trophy. I am going to put it in my office.”

“Beard is going to be picking me up at the airport and then we were gonna get to it with some beers and a whiteboard. Any chance you would want to join us?”

“You really think I was going to not see you the moment you got back?”

[cakeofthepan]

Just a little Ashly Burch appreciation for y’all. Plus some bonus sibling favoritism at the end ;)

[Audio Transcript:

[Instrumental Old Time Rock and Roll plays in the background]

Ashly: Hi, I'm Ashly Burch. I play Mark Likely. Brother to Well Actually formerly Scam Likely— No, I'm his sister. This is going great.

[laughter]

Henry: Mark Likely! My goodness gracious!

Mark: [drawn out and nasally] Hi—!

[someone dry spit-takes]

Mark:  Hi…!

Mark: Okay, look. At max, two favors.

[laughter]

Mark: Two favors.

Will: Wow!

Ashly: I want to cast Shape Changer on myself to wriggle out of his grasp.

Anthony: Go ahead.

Jimmy: Ooh...

Anthony: What do you change shape into?

Ashly: The first thing that came to mind was an otter in a rock and roll outfit because we're in the...

Beth: Hell yeah.

Freddie: Oh my God...

Matt: Hell yeah.

Anthony: Okay, so that's a thing.

Ashly: So, I slip out and then I kind of squirm on top of the nearest bar.

Anthony: Okay.

Ashly: I'm just going to look at him with my big 'ol otter eyes and go like—

Mark: [singing sadly] Just take those old records off the shelf. I'll sit and listen to them by myself.

Henry: Hey, Mark. Real quick.

Mark: Yeah.

Henry: What is a death tyrant? What is that?

Mark: [sucks air through teeth] Ooh, ah... yeah. I guess I should tell you guys that.

Dae-ruel: Mmhmm.

Mark: Y’know, he's got eyes that are kind of... [hisses again]

Henry: Okay.

Mark: They're not great, uh...

Jodie: You're going to help us fight this guy, right?

Mark: Oh, yeah! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...

[laughter]

Ashly: Mark's going to shapeshift into... a recognizable rendering of the Tenth Doctor, but going into like an American phone booth.

Beth: Oh. My goodness.

Freddie: [laughing] Oh my God!

Ashly: And she's going to go like—

Mark: I'm the Doctor! Here I go in my BARDIS!

[laughter]

Ashly: And like walk in.

Anthony: Well Actually doubles over and goes—

Well Actually: It's not— It’s not an American phone— [pained grunt, like he’s been stabbed and might throw up] It's not an American phone booth and it's not called the BARDIS. [grunts] Its—

Mark: Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo-doo-doo! Hey, Tulip. Do you want to come with me and see the galaxies?

[laughter]

Well Actually: [physically pained] That's not her name. That’s not her name. Her name was Rose. It was the Time And Relative Dimension In Space, it's not—[barf sound]

Mark: Oh, no! A Small-ec! He's so small, I'll squish him! With my sonic hammer!

Mark: Why the fuck did I go to them?

[resurgence of laughter]

Mark: Why did I go to them? First pick. First pick, I went to these guys. God, I'm so fucking stupid.

[music fades out]

Matt: You're not going to let that happen.

Anthony: No.

Matt: [dice roll] Especially with an 18?

Ashly: [sucker-punched] Uh!

Anthony: Ashly, go ahead and roll Dexterity.

Ashly: Oh, God. I don't think that's very good for your old pal. Ah, it's alright.

Anthony: You'll do with advantage though because you shape-changed.

Ashly: [two dice rolls] Euh... 11.

Anthony: Now go ahead and roll again.

Ashly: I did.

Beth: Just keep going.

[chuckles]

Anthony: Yeah, do it again until you get a 19.

Beth: Say when.

Ashly: And again?

End Transcript]

[inkyvendingmachine]

PANIC! At the Cult Mob Talent Contest Season 3, Episodes 11

💀 Call of Cthulhu: Haunted Hijinx Masterpost 💀 🎶 Call of Cthulhu Season Three Masterpost 🎶

Warning: This campaign is an edited version of Call of Cthulhu: Song and Dance scenario from the Tales of the Crescent City book. While a lot has been changed, there IS spoilers for it throughout these posts.

SPECIAL SHOUT OUT TO @bertrumstrousers​ WHO APPARENTLY HELPED THREN BY BRAINSTORMING AND PROVIDING SOME OF THE POSSIBLE CONTENT SHE COULD USE FOR BETRUM SHOWING UP IN THE GAME?!?! including some signature words he yells at one point, which still delights me to this day.

ART CHANGES THIS SEASON!! @inkdemonapologist and I are collabing on all the art for these summery posts!! Shazz does lines, and I compose and colour the pieces.

Joey has since had a few rooms of his own secretly installed throughout the building as Thomas has been replacing pipes. He says they’re to have a quiet space where he can be uninterrupted, a lot of them using old abandoned rooms that had become storage for outdated materials. The project was started after the New Orleans Trip though, so it’s more likely… so he can have somewhere hidden to rest.

Hahaha yeah no it’s so he has privacy for like normal Joey extra hard working hours hahahahaha anyways this is where Joey and Sammy end up talking with Prophet, along with Bendy. Sammy has his own questions he writes down on a piece of paper for Prophet to answer on, and Joey silently waits in the background to ask his own questions afterwards. 

His own questions being… how to stop himself from going mad like last time. He doesn’t want to betray Prophet again, but it’s Prophet’s sort of realms that does this to him. So… what to do to stop it? Bendy also has a question about one of the things from Prophet’s last vision, a strangely mundane demonic monster that Sammy’d described, and Prophet does his best to draw it for them.

Meanwhile, Jack ends up checking on the music department. After being asked by Sammy to keep an eye on Jack, Norman follows him around as well. Henry ends up coming in a little late after spending the morning going over a few more things with Linda in preparation, checking on his own department before all of them meet up in the afternoon and go over final plans. While Prophet and Sammy managed to figure out that the cultists’ plan is to put Angels (like those monsters they fought in NOLA) into Susie, Colette, and Nichole, and corrupt the muses possessing them with the Yellow King, they still don’t exactly know how that’s happening, or when, or what Y and his men are going to try to do themselves to get to this goal.

So! Our goal is actually very simple: Find the girls and get them out of there before the mob can execute their plan. Just be heckin better at kidnapping some ladies out of a public place than a whole buncha mobsters! 

No Problem!!! 

This will surely go… fine!

More specifically, we’re gonna grab the girls, head IMMEDIATELY to the apartment where the circle is already existing with a lot of the supplies needed to finish it, and expel the muses before the goons ever figure out what’s going on.

... from a venue that only a few of us have snuck around in so far and hardly know the layout of.

... during a contest that we have no connections to but the mob clearly does.

Okay, so maybe we need a little more of a plan, just in case we get separated at the start. Sammy and Norman know Susie the mostest, so if we can’t figure out another way to get Sammy back there, those two can just brute force and sneak their way back there, respectively. If Peter can get in the back as Press, bonus. Henry and Jack will secure an exit and be ready to drive if we manage to find any of the girls, just get them out as quickly as possible. And Joey has called upon Leon (Colette’s boyfriend, the nervous doctor guy), Allison, and Timothee (brother of Nichole and gun enthusiast) to get their help; the four of them will run a middle man between the two groups and help with the transfer of any of the girls out of the building.

AND! THAT’S ABOUT ALL THE PLANNING WE CAN DO!! CROSS UR FINGERS AND REMEMBER THAT PROBABLY MOST OF THE MAFIA IS MADE OUT OF WEIRD YELLOW INK SO WE CAN’T JUST TREAT EM LIKE REGULAR HUMANS IF WE GET INTO A CONFRONTATION OKAY EVERYONE IN THE CARS LET’S GO.

Sammy brings up that any performance by one of the muses might get them wrapped up in their current creative addictions, just like how he lost himself the other night and Norman lost hours to dancing before when he met the girls–

THEN DON’T LET THAT HAPPEN OKAY EVERYONE IN THE CARS L E T ‘ S G O.

They arrive at the contest about an hour before it starts, making sure to come in with the crowds and have the vehicles parked far enough away from the entrance they’re not immediately recognized, but with easy road access for getting away once they gotta.

Joey and Bendy and Sammy immediately get distracted looking at Coney Island as they go in, all three of them rather wishing to be there instead of at a stuffy contest. Luckily, Jack and Henry are paying enough attention to point out the signup situation as well as the security situation.

As well as the… familiar band situation. Oh look, they replaced that one dude already. Wouldn’t be a band without a saxophone player after all. 

Sammy and Joey go to see if Susie is already here or not by trying to spy on the sign up lists instead of asking like normal people do until Sammy gets caught trying to spy because he’s terrible at being sneaky. Nobody named Susie Campbell is signed up… but Joey notices there’s a line on the list that just says “Alice.”

So she is here.

Well, time to start looking then. The plan is altered slightly as we meet up with the others: Norman tries to sneak in the back as a staff member, ends up fumbling on identifying what band member he’s supposed to be by the instrument case he’s carrying (which actually has a gun in it,) but Peter gets the security caught up in checking his press pass and Norman slips through.

As a second wave sneaking back, Leon and Sammy sign up as a music/singing duo (doesn’t matter if Leon can sing or not, we’re planning on not letting performances start on that stage at all if possible.) This is because nobody else actually can easily identify Colette, and on top of that, nobody else knows what to possibly say to her to get her to agree to come with them. 

Timothee and Henry end up posting up back, keeping an eye out on the floor, since they’re the most armed and ready to barge their way into a situation and change it. If something happens, they can intercept, and if we get the girls to them, they can protect. Also Henry has the Bendy Lapel Pin, so there’s a form of communication back to Joey (through Bendy) through that.

Which leaves Allison, Joey + Bendy, and Jack to play middle field; Most sociable, best for blending in, and they can run interference between the two groups if need be.

… SO BASICALLY EVERYTHING IS THE SAME EXCEPT WE SHUFFLED SOME PEOPLE AROUND;;

Sammy and Leon head backstage and start looking around. Sammy is both looking for Susie, but also looking for any magic, ink, changes to the building since he was last here. Hidden doors, weird walls… Nothing suspicious yet, but Peter confirms while passing by that Y is in one of the backrooms, the office with the guarded door. All the players are here.

Which includes,

THE GREAT BERTRUM PIEDMONT

That’s right, BERTRUM IS HERE!!!!!! The contest flyer advertised a famous guest judge for the contest and ITS HIM, GREAT APPRECIATOR OF THE ARTS BERTRUM PIEDMONT,

who is, currently talking very loudly,,, to anyone that will listen to him,,,,,, over near the buffet. About the contest that they’re already at and how great it is, but also about his picks for the hors d'oeuvres and how great those are too.

 Because he is great.

Everyone continues to hold their positions, all looking for the girls. As the room gets more filled and it gets closer to time, Bertrum disappears into the back, and the search becomes a bit more desperate as we try to beat out the mob in this race of sorts. 

But then! Sammy does end up spotting three girls, one of them is absolutely Susie!! Sammy grabs Leon and immediately runs over to catch up with them before they head out onto the floor and disappear into the crowd.

Sammy grabs her arm, and it takes her a few blinks before she goes from simply politely smiling at him, to a recognizable expression. She asks why he’s here instead of at the studio getting ready for the premiere and, gosh, Sorry! Was gonna swing by but then got caught up in–

Doesn’t matter! Sammy starts trying to drag her out with him, insisting that it’s dangerous if she performs here and they need to go right now.

Nicole obviously notices and cuts him off while Leon tries to talk to his girlfriend as well. This gets Sammy rambling for a moment, insisting they all get out of here before the the cult of the Yellow–

Aaaaaaand Peter thankfully steps in very quickly to stop this before the guards start focusing too hard on what’s happening in this corner. Susie is looking a bit shaken, but Nicole steps in and alleviates all their fears. Of course it’s not a cult, why would a cult be having a talent contest. And they can’t just sacrifice someone on stage or whatever publicly like this. That’d be ridiculous. 

And… Sammy nods. Yeah, okay, that makes sense. They can’t snatch them off stage… and if this is the one finally thing the girls need to do before they go with them, okay, fine. Just come back here right after! Or find Joey! One last performance and that’s it!

And he lets them go. 

Susie promises she understands and will find Sammy right after and not go off with anyone else, giving him a kiss on the cheek before disappearing into the floods of people on the floor. Sammy… feels weird. Not just because of how convincing Nicole was, but this doesn’t seem exactly like what he slammed into the other night while trying to reach out with the dream spell. And it doesn’t seem quite like Susie either…

Sammy tells Peter to let the rest of them know of the new plan; let the girls get their last performance in, then go. Because this is a very smart and good decision he made using all of his brain cell. Peter does just that.

(.......remember how Joey’s ability to fast talk people has been SUPERNATURALLY BOOSTED by one of the muses…… tHAT MIGHT BE…. THE ONE NICHOLE HAS……)

But while he’s making his way through the crowds, Joey spots Susie coming down from the back and starts heading towards her to try and convince her himself, since clearly Sammy didn’t manage to catch her in the back. The sooner he can get her to Henry and Timothee, the sooner he can go check on Sammy and make sure he didn’t get kidnapped or something again. 

Though first he tells Allison to maybe not approach Susie unless absolutely necessary. Or be seen by her. Because she is maybe not on the friends list right now and will make this more difficult. Allison simply nods and makes herself scarce.

Joey manages to use his dancing skills to weave through the crowd and get dancing with Susie, who is still surrounded by Nicole and Colette as well. She tries to inform him about the plan she made with Sammy and that everything is fine, which of course he’s having none of. So, he pulls her into a dance to help sell the very touching speech he’s going to deliver, about how he knows what’s going on, and he knows what she’s done, but he can’t let this happen at the risk of losing his Alice Angel.

Susie tears up a bit, because she wasn’t quite sure of herself recently. But before the hook manages to catch, Nicole steps in, frustrated with why everyone keeps trying to ruin their fun, just let them have one last evening together before they can’t anymore JEEZE (we’re gonna ignore the fact this has been going on for a week but ok)

She wants a bang to go out on? Alright!! Then Joey can give her a way better performance opportunity than this. He has a whole theater lined up this weekend, filled with big names in the entertainment industry, people who worked with singers and dancers for movie productions all over New York to see his feature film. If they go with him right now, he will make sure to give them a stage far larger than this one, but if they go through with this silly contest tonight, they might never do anything together again because of the men hunting them right now. Which, by the way? Bertie back there may have done amazing work for Coney Island and be a fancy name, but apparently he is only here for the friggin tiny sausages. Meanwhile, Joey will make the entire stage theirs. 

Speaking of.

The lights go down. The stage lights up, and from the curtains emerges

The Great Bertrum Piedmont

And starts on his long rambles of introducing himself and getting the crowd’s energy up all on their adoration of him. Of course. He actually hasn’t picked up the mic yet he’s just that loud and attention grabbing that the entire room kinda simmered down. Peter whispers that he’s heard this guy is a pain to try to stop interviewing. JOEY WILL REMEMBER THIS…

While this is happening and Joey has been going back and forth with Nicole, Susie manages to disappear on him and head towards the line up of contestants as Bertrum gets the singing contest started.

And… also starts picking off contestants. Quite quickly. Apparently he’s not only picky about the hors d'oeuvres, but also music? Hardly letting a lot of them get their songs started even before interrupting them.

And Alice is a name that isn’t far down the list.

Joey frantically starts waving everyone from where they are and pointing towards the girls, just trying to get them to do SOMETHING to stop all of this. They CAN’T LET THEM PERFORM. Sammy is still waiting backstage, since, uh, the plan was to let them sing and whatever anyways; but Henry catches Joey’s frantic waving, and being fluent in Joey, heads over to try and convince Susie to come with him. Somehow. Henry meets her near where Jack is, and she starts trying to tell him as well of the “plan” Sammy agreed to as he tries to usher her out. Knowing Sammy, WHO SPECIFICALLY WARNED EVERYONE NOT TO LET THEM PERFORM, Jack immediately sees that something went wrong, and heads towards the back stage to find him and make sure he’s okay since Sammy wouldn’t have just agreed to such a plan.

Susie’s grown more concerned by the boys’ determination, and Henry actually does manage to convince her and doesn’t need to opaquely grab and run, since for once, Nicole is not around. But Joey has lost sight of Colette now, and Nicole is still being stubborn, and something will clearly be up the moment the muse-infused girls don’t show up. SO IT MIGHT AS WELL BE UP NOW.

Joey leaps up on stage between singers during a long pause and grabs the mic, putting on his showman persona and pulls out a good ol’ “Well, while we’re waiting for that contestant to make it out to the floor, why don’t you tell us a bit more about yourself!”

Which works of course. He’s

The Great Bertrum Piedmont!

And he has SO MUCH to tell you all about himself.

While on stage, Joey notices four things.

The band is no longer hanging out in the bandstand. Okay, this was expected, and Joey is aware he will probably have goons on him very soon. Timothee has managed to find Nicole and is currently talking with her. Good. Henry is heading towards the exit with Susie. Good. Colette… is nowhere to be found. That one, iiiiiiisssssss,,, less than good….? Actually it’s very bad.

Joey disappears into the curtains as the first band-goon shows his face, starting to climb onto the front of the stage, letting Bertie continue on now that he has the initial nudge of momentum to start going. 

Which he does.

Jack manages to find Sammy in the back (after… probably lifting someone’s ticket,) and is immediately met with the very normal “What the Fuck is Joey Doing” response. It’s almost a secondary secret company slogan at this point. Jack asks him about this “New Plan” he’s apparently made, and as he gets talking about it Sammy slowly realizes… what he’s saying. Jack helps finish that nail off by reminding him of how bad the situation is going to be the moment any one of them performs.

Okay, yeah, Jack’s probably right. Let’s go get the girls out of here now. They run back out to the floor with Leon and start trying to find the girls. They manage to spot Susie and Nicole in the crowd, but before they can find Colette, Jack points out another one of the band goons is making his way towards Nicole. Since it looks like Henry has Susie heading towards the exit, OUR band boys decide to run interference. Also Peter. Leon heads out onto the dance floor to find his girlfriend and sorta disappears.

The one band goon heading towards Nicole tries to start with convincing them that he just needs to talk with Nicole backstage while trying to push his way through Jack, Sammy, Peter and Timothee who are all sort of getting in his way. So he also waves over some of the general security in the place to help out. Luckily, this all helps out Timothee’s case, and he convinces Nicole to go finally, so they manage to start pushing towards the exit after Henry and Susie while Jack, Peter and Sammy stall.

Joey, between the layers of curtains, uses a toon arm to reach up to the catwalk and zoop himself up there before the goons can find him, expecting them to come from both sides. This indeed confuses the goon, as he’s left scratching his head about where Joey possibly could have gone and starting to look behind the other curtains. Meanwhile Joey tries to sneak across to the opposite side of the catwalk so he can, hopefully, just disappear completely and leave them searching. Before jumping down, he looks out over the crowd to try and get an idea of the situation again, and sees the goons heading towards one of the back doors at the other end of the stage from him, with another person pushed between them all, in a very planned manner… Well, so much for sneaking down.

Now that two of the girls are near escaping and Sammy has become what he’s second best at, being a completely immovable and bothersome object the moment he’s pissed off, the goon decides to shake things up: He yells and fires off a gun, which immediately brings up a whole chorus of screaming as people start to panic, including 

The Great Bertrum Piedmont 

yelling BLOODY SCAMPER!!! and helping the panic be even more panic. The goon attempts to use the chaos to run after the girls, but despite initial shock of gun fire, Sammy immediately launches himself to stop him. He manages to stop him, but only because, perhaps, he is busy starting to turn one of his hands into some yellow claaaws? Yike,

While Sammy is freaking out a bit about the transformed hand, Jack catches the security guy who was waved over, and uses the new panic caused by the guy who was yelling right as a gunshot went off and is now getting into a fight with Sammy, to try and convince him that THIS GUY is actually the one causing a commotion and security needs to deal with him. Also uhh… his hand is. Weird. The goon starts trying to struggle and break out of Sammy’s grip while this is happening. Sammy manages to swing him around and punch him though, and the security guy finally sees the claws. So he uh, maybe takes some sanity damage from that, but also is now convinced that this band dude is absolutely the problem and starts working to remove him.

Or, try.

Henry manages to make it outside with Susie, while Timothee and Nicole are somewhat behind them but still making good time. But now the panic is causing a whole crowd of people to start moving towards the exit too and it’s about to get a lot harder to find each other and get out. Though once Susie is out of the building, Allison reveals herself near the entrance to the dance floor, standing on one of the tables and starting to calm people, using her powers to convince them they’d agreed to follow her out instead, and getting them out of the way. It doesn’t make the crowd less big, but people are moving out of the building quicker now, which will be good for when the rest need to run.

Joey has control of the spotlights, so he ends up grabbing one and turning it on the group of “band members” heading towards the back door, in an attempt to see better who they’re escorting, but also to blind them of what he’s doing above. Actually, he runs down the line and turns ALL the spotlights on them, assuming they probably have one of the girls just by the fact that Leon is STILL aimlessly wandering the dancefloor. And while they’re squinting at that, he goes and does what you’d do in any cartoon to stop a bad guy: throw a pulley break and drop a sandbag on him. Both Peter and 

T h e   G r e a t   B e r t r u m   P i e d m o n t

had noticed the spotlights turning, but one of them runs towards the shine while the other runs away into the backstage dressing rooms. 

I’m sure you can guess which one does what.

Sammy is still fighting with the band goon, who is quite intent on capturing him or something, which is terrifying, actually, but Sammy responds to fear by punching, while the goon tries to pin him down. Which, after some wide throws, Sammy manages to leave himself open enough that the goon guy grabs him around the center and throws him over his shoulder. Sammy of course is kicking and yelling. Jack is panicking and ends up just running towards him and trying to tackle the goon to do???!? ANYTHING TO GET SAMMY FREE? He doesn’t manage to build up enough strength to throw a snake this guy around and actually ends up being kicked back into a table. Leon rushes over now that the room is somewhat cleared out and he’s rather sure Colette is not around, and tries to help Jack up. The security guard finally decides enough is enough, pulls out his kNIFE?!?? And runs in to knife this… mONSTER?!?! While Sammy is still flailing around in his arms…

Joey looks down from the catwalk to chase after the group and notices that… the man under the sand bag… the liquid around him… is not yellow.

It’s red.

Oh no, that’s not– Joey takes a moment as he’s kicked in the head right out of cartoon world by the reality of this all. During that he does hear yelling in the back, specifically the loud voice of

The Great Bertrum Piedmont

complaining to SOMEONE about how they got him into this mess, they better bloody well get him out of it! He also manages to spot Peter who had run over. Good, anything else to think about besides the sandbag. He does the ladder slidey thing down, quickly informs Peter that the goons are still dragging someone to the back, and then immediately goes chasing after them, leaving Peter to take his own moment of “There’s a squished guy under a sand bag” sanity damage.

Joey slides into the hallway to see the back doors shoved open and a car speeding off, with all the goons and their captive in the back and, probably Bertie, in it. There’s a moment of trying to figure out if he can hecking chase down a car, when something else clicks.

He doesn’t need to chase down the car. He knows where they’re going.

That drawing from Prophet’s vision? 

It finally makes sense.

He knows of the demonic monster of Coney Island.

[Next Episode]

[Previous Episode]

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Interviews - Henry Cavill x wife/actress reader

Summary: You and Henry have been married for a couple years now, and when you’re both part of the Witcher cast, fun interviews are to be had.

Warning: nothing but a good time, btw I’ve never written anything like this so I hope it’s good enough that I might feel motivated to write more

-Readers Witcher character is loosely based off my Geralt fic from here (just a little self promotion), but in this case you play a full vampire in this Witcher universe

The days have been long and grueling, filming hours upon hours of stunts and regular acting had taken its toll. Not to mention the countless times in hair and make up paired with costume changes and traveling to film on certain locations.

To say being apart of Netflix’s The Witcher was full of tiring days and some accidental bruises would be a huge understatement. But none of that mattered, nor did you bother to complain when through the thick and thin of it all did you have Henry with you along the way. And your favorite big slobbery bear, Kal whenever he was allowed on set.

Fortunately for you in the beginning of all the craziness, the casting and writers had wanted you specifically for the part of Y/C/N in the new series before Henry even auditioned for the role of Geralt, that was soon given to him after you accepted your fresh role of vampiric heroine.

It was ironically strange in a good way, you had watched your dork of a husband play the Witcher: Wild Hunt a few times before, eventually learning of what Geralt of Rivia was, who Y/C/N was in the story, who Yennefer and Ciri were, Tris and even Jaskier.

Who would have thought that you’d finally get to snag a role side by side with Henry in quite literally one of the most fantastic shows you’ve ever heard of. You didn’t even need to see the show yet to know how well it was most likely to be reviewed. Being a key character in the grand storyline was enough to convince you of how amazing it would most certainly turn out in the finished product.

And after all was said and done, you couldn’t believe how well loved and popular the show truly became in the following months after shooting and its eventual release onto Netflix. The after parties and cast celebrations truly made you blessedly grateful for pulling through to the vary end.

Then again you had your mans Henry by your side every step of the way. He was your rock and you were most definitely his. You know life on set would have been far less entertaining and dreadfully long if not for the lovely company of your dear Witcher, Henry. And so far after the fact, you and a good portion of the cast have been placed in random interviews for the majority of the day.

Reason being, The Witcher has at long last finally premiered and as per usual the people and media live for those cast interviews that always reveal some interesting events. So far this morning you’ve done some interviews with Anya that have gone perfectly fine since the two of you seem to click so well.

Also it helps ease the anxiety of your fellow newer cast mates to the world of continuous interviews with an experienced veteran actor like yourself, who’s gone round the ring more times then you can count. Though you can’t help but wonder how Henry’s doing, considering you’ve been separated since the sessions began at 10am, you’ve had lunch and now it’s about 1 in the afternoon with more hours to go.

Luckily for you, you’ve just been informed of another interview with the man of the hour himself. Saying your goodbyes and well wishes to your fellow cast mates, you stand and follow the guide into the advised place. Aka some really nice hotel room that’s been done up real nice for efficient interviewing, complete with the Witcher insignia on a large background poster and three chairs that happen to look rather comfy.

The camera and sound people nod in acknowledgment as you walk in, you nod back no doubt making their day with your friendliness and adorable smile that quite literally lights up a room. Soon you spot the bubbly yet nervous interviewee who instantly welcomes you into her space like you’re an old friend.

You sit, a bit confused as to where your partner happens to be at the moment, the interviewer, Lauren makes small talk before a door opens and her big bright doe eyes go wide in nervous excitement. A telling smile upon her face as she shifts in her chair before looking back to you again with a happy grin.

Henry says a quick hello to the behind the scenes crew before waving to Lauren, you smirk while watching him get comfortable next to you, “Well, well, well. Get lost on your way up, you know they have guides for a reason.” You tease as he chuckles at your humorous jab, relieved to see you again after a couple hours apart.

“Traffic.” He quips with a shrug.

“Uh huh.” You mutter with a shake of your head before drawing your attention back to Laura, “Can’t take him anywhere I swear, he does this all the time.”

She laughs as Henry pretends to gasp at your teasing, you chuckle along with them before she finally collects herself, “Well, welcome back to London. It’s fantastic to have you both in town once again, and your big beautiful faces all over Leicester Square.”

You both laugh, “Right.” Says Henry, “I guess we do look pretty cool.”

“Hell yeah, I mean where else can I see myself with a giant sword on a building? And anyways look at this beautiful mug,” You say gently squeezing Henry’s cheeks in your hand, “he’s literally killing it out there.” They laugh as you give Hen another playful squeeze before letting go and setting your arm against the chairs cushioned armrest. 

“Alight let’s start.” She says enthusiastically before glancing down at her cards then back up to you and Henry. Then into one of the two the cameras, “Hi I’m Lauren from Entertainment Weekly and today we’re here with the two stars of Netflix’s The Witcher.” She says enthusiastically while giving a nod to you two, indicating that the camera is now focused on you both, “Henry Cavill and Y/N Cavill.”

You both smile in acknowledgment as Henry gives a slight nod, “How you doing?”

“I’m great,” She beams, “So, I’ll get right into it, what do you like most about the story? What really drew you into the script that made you say, yes this is going to be awesome?”

Slapping a hand against Henry’s muscular leg, you hum, “I’ll let Hen take this one he’s a real expert on the linguistics of the whole show.”

“Thanks Y/N/N.” Replies Henry, bemused that you’re making him take the first question.

You nod to him knowingly with a smirk, “Of course.” Knowing how much he loves to talk about the show and also because you’d rather have him use his energy to talk about it then do that yourself. Priorities, right, though in your defense it’s been a long day.

“Well I absolutely love the games and the books themselves are phenomenal works of literature.” He explains, his face glowing with that usual glimmer of excitement in his eyes, “The story and the world of the Witcher is just so rich and full of potential that when I signed on for the show, I immediately knew it would be amazing, no doubt.”

You lean into the arm of you chair, “And of course I was there so that’s always a bonus.”

“That too.” He smiles adorably, “That too of course.”

Lauren smiles, “Great. So, what was it like working together, how was it having your characters interact with one another?”

You smile, setting a hand against Henry’s forearm, “This guy right here.” You deadpan before waving him off dramatically, “So annoying, my god he whined all the time and he was such a drama queen dear lord so ugh....” You start cackling before you can even finish the sentence causing Henry to loose it as well and with that the interviewer.

Shaking your head you rest your hand against his shoulder, “I joke, he was a gem to work with as usual...I mean I feel incredibly blessed to be able to act alongside my husband for months and months every single day. It’s a rarity in this line of work and I’m grateful to have shared this experience...and I guess more so this whole adventure with him as well.”

The interviewer aww’s as Henry tilts his head to lean into your hand that’s still resting atop his shoulder before pulling away just as quickly, the intimate sentiment not going unnoticed by you or Lauren who looks to be enjoying your loving yet calm energy with one another. “That’s so sweet, what about you Henry?”

“Oh yes absolutely,” Agrees Henry to your recent statement, “not only did I have her by my side through it all but the dynamic of our characters interacting together was so fun to shoot. I think the audience will really be able to see their relationship grow on screen into something strong and beautiful like in the books.”

Slow clapping you give him a curt nod of approval, “Well said.”

Lauren smirks, “Seems like it. Well, I was able to catch the premier yesterday and I gotta say...it was fantastic! I couldn’t believe how diffident the two of you looked from how you are now.” She gushes enthusiastically.

The corners of Henry’s lips curl into a proud smile for the fellow crew of the Witcher’s, “Oh that’s great then, honestly we gotta give all the props to the costume and makeup team, they’re so talented and know how to make us look like real badasses.” He adds.

You nod in agreement before grinning at a positive memory of your first interaction with Henry as Geralt, “Oh for sure, I remember during the early stages of production when our characters met each other for the first time, before this we came to set together but went separate ways to shoot our own stuff in the meantime so I never got a real look at him.” You recall with a bright smile as Henry watches your every move, beaming just the same.

“It was so funny, I was in the tent with Freya Allen, the wonderful girl who plays Ciri, and then suddenly her eyes got all big and nervous and I was like, that’s not me right? Something weird didn’t just happen with my costume? And then I turned around to find this man, wig on, face a mess, and his eyes looked so fearsome and different...it was a bit startling.” You say with a chuckle, “I clearly wasn’t expecting to see Geralt right then and there. He just looked so unlike Henry.”

“Yeah, I was almost hurt.” Laughs Henry, “She had to like squint and make sure it was me.”

Rolling your eyes, you shrug, “He had some real creepy looking colored contacts, yunno?”

Henry fake scoffs, “You’re one to talk, I mean when I first say her, Y/N’s eyes were red and she had fake blood spattered all over her face and shirt. Oh, and not to mention those fangs they put on your teeth...we probably traumatized poor Freya that day.”

“Oh shit you’re right!” You exclaim with a snort of concealed laughter, “God I completely forgot about how I looked...now since I think about it, I did that a lot too. I would just walk up to people and be completely oblivious as to what kind of nightmare I looked like, honestly I might have scared one of our producers a couple of times.” You add with a half nervous laugh, it’s true, you did scare some of the crew unintentionally. Most of the time.

Lauren lightly chuckles, “That sounds like you were quite the sight to see then.” She says before glancing back down at her notes, “Alright I have’ta ask, is there anything that you two took home with you from set?”

“Besides Henry every night,” He holds back a laugh while covering his mouth as you nonchalantly continue, “Uh, yes actually I got to take home Y/C/N’s wolf ring that I loved so much and just thought was the coolist thing ever and....uh, I might have stolen some socks too.”

“So that’s why after filming the amount of socks of yours I had to fold increased?” Wonders Henry with a surprised snort of realization.

Turning your head to give him a “no shit” kinda look, you look back at Lauren, pointing your thumb at Henry, “Master sleuth right here, but hey, he folds my laundry.”

“Aw that’s great.” Adds Lauren with a smile before turning her attention to Henry, “What about you Henry? Take anything from set?”

“More then Y/N did actually...”

“He just about took the whole makeup trailer most nights, I swear.”

Henry chuckles, “That. Is true.” He agrees with a nod, “Interesting enough, at home I’ve got Geralt’s armor hung up in our living room and a multitude of other nicknacks that I’ve collected during filming.” He adds, glancing over to you, “So uh, yeah, we were fairly lucky to be able to snag what we could.”

Lauren smiles, absentmindedly shuffling her cards, “That’s awesome to have such special memorabilia, you guys really are fortunate.” She adds before reading off from another card, “Alright you two, care to play a game called guess the image? Witcher style.”

Your face perks up at this, you’re a sucker for interview games and Henry knows it, “Are you reading my mind or something, I have been waiting all day for someone to ask about playing a game.” You gush rather enthusiastically. 

He smiles at your adorableness and how excited you’ve just become, Lauren grins, happy that her suggestion has been so well received, “Okay so how it works is, I’ll show you an image on my iPad and then you have to guess who or what I’m showing you.”

“Oh, cool I’ve heard of this,” You reply, turning to Henry with a smirk, “Loser has to clean Kal’s yard poop for a week.”

Rolling his gorgeous blue eyes he chuckles, “You’re on.”

“Alright, the stakes are high, you two ready?” Beams Lauren, holding her iPad to her chest as she awaits an answer.

“Yes, I’m ready to kick his ass.” You quip, leaning an arm against your chair while Henry does about the same, though he does his best to contain his laughter.

“Okay, first image.” She holds up the device to show some sort of weird golden thing, it’s shiny and hard, worst part is that you’re not entirely sure what the hell it could be.

Sensing your confusion Henry nudges your shoulder, though you ignore it before he smartly answers, “Oh, is that...Renfri’s brooch?” Little shit knows exactly what that is, of course he does.

Lauren claps, “Correct.” Zooming out of the image to show the full picture of the golden brooch, “Right on, that’s one point for Mr. Cavill.”

You scoff playfully, “Beginners luck.” While Henry side eyes you with a humorous grin upon his plush lips, he nudges your arm, “I’m going to really enjoy not cleaning up Kal’s grass turds for awhile.” He mutters lightheartedly, though you know deep down he’s being serious, no way is he going to win this, you think. You won’t have it, hopefully the next few pictures aren’t as difficult, Kal duty is not fun by any means.

“Shut up.” You grumble with a dismissive wave of your hand, though just teasing of course.

“Okay next image.” This time the blurred photo looks much more familiar, soon it clicks as to what the obscured blurriness actually is, yes!

“Got it! Anya’s er I guess Yennefer’s dress from the fight at Sodden.” Lauren giggles, zooming the image out to reveal Yennefer in her tasseled blue and purple dress from the battle at Sodden Hill. “I’m amazing I know.” You boast at Henry with a casual little bow in your seat.

“It’s the second question.” He deadpans, eyes crinkling in amusement as you shake your head at him.

“Pffff get outta here.” You mutter back, gently pushing his arm off of your chairs armrest and setting yours in its place while he gives you a fake shocked expression.

In turn you can’t help the smile that tugs at the corner of your lips, so instead of saying some sassy remark that would no doubt get a reaction out of him, you turn your attention back over to Lauren who’s looking over her notes again.

“Fantastic,” She says, glancing back up at you and Henry, “you’re both tied with one point each. Alright, anyone know what this is?” She asks showing something red and fuzzy, a bit of dirty skin showing from one corner but with The Witcher this bloody image could literally be anything.

The both of you squint, puzzled as to what this could be, “Y/N you got any ideas.” Wonders Henry, brows furrowed as his face contorts into deep concentrated thought.

Raising a brow, you hum, “If I knew I wouldn’t tell you.”

“Fair point.” He chuckles.

Lauren smiles, “Any guesses?”

 After a few concentrated moments, Henry shrugs in defeat,  “I’m stumped.” He admits as you study the image harder, mind racing to put the pieces together as to what the hell you’re looking at.

“No, I think I might know this....erm is it...me?” You wonder, voice raising in question, hoping to be correct about this or face the teasing of Henry.

Lauren quickly zooms out of the obscured image, “It is!” She says excitedly, revealing the picture of you from your characters debut in episode 2 where you save a girl from a werewolf, your mouth is covered in blood and so is most of your costumes chest area and left arm from the struggle. Not to mention the make-up teams fun 20 minutes of throwing fake sticky blood all over you to get the right look for the taxing scene.

You grimace a bit, “Oh god that was quite the day on set,” You recall with a half smile, “I was doing stunts all day covered in that red syrupy dye, I think it took a week to get out of my skin.”

Henry suddenly snorts with laughter, “Right! That reminds me, I thought Kal had gotten cut or something, it was just Y/N who had hugged him not realizing she still had some fake blood on her arm.”

“Jeez that’s right, I felt so bad, but I couldn’t stop laughing once we realized it was just me.”

Lauren grins, excited to hear some hidden information about little things that happens behind the scenes, “Oh wow that must have been a sight, alright Henry, Y/N’s taken the lead with a two to one score.” She says as you playfully nudge his strong shoulder. “Second to last image, what is this?”

Without missing a single beat Henry replies, “Jaskier.”

Squinting at the image you lean closer to the iPad, “How the hell do you see Jaskier?”

Smiling the interviewer zooms out to reveal the bards full outfit from the banquet scene, though he’s in the background of a fight between Geralt and some Cintran knights. “Right on!” She exclaims as you lean back into your seat dumbfounded, shoulder flush against Henry’s as he clutches your arm and squeezes it affectionately.

Ignoring his silent show of victory you shrug, “And they say he’s just another pretty face,” Earning a laugh from Lauren and some of the crew as you smirk at the camera, face them shifting to apologetic, “also I’m so sorry Joey you beautiful bastard apparently I’m blind. Uh, we don’t have to dwell on it, Lauren whatcha got?”

“You guys are both tied with two points each, last chance to win.” She replies before glancing down at her iPad, “Alright, what is this?” She asks, her iPad showing that of fuzzy bright colors, with a small corner smear of dull white that clearly wouldn’t make much sense to the untrained eye.

Smirking you glance at a puzzled Henry before sitting up in your seat, feeling rather good about yourself, “Would that happen to be, Hen in Stregobor’s illusion?” You answer with, though sounding a bit as a question considering you aren’t entirely confident as to what image this is.

Lauren’s brows raise in surprise, “Henry, looks like we have a winner. Y/N you are correct.” She beams, enlarging the image to reveal Geralt’s side profile as he talks to the old wizard while the background stays colorful and shrouded in various arrays of sunlight..

Shaking your fist victoriously in the air you give a couple enthusiastic whoop whoops while Henry simply takes it like a champ, “Have fun cleaning up Karl’s monster turds, cause this lucky lady doesn’t have to.” You boast as Henry and the crew laugh.

“Well that was something,” Beams Lauren, “I’m so glad to have chatted for a bit about your guys’ amazing new series, and maybe ended a relationship in the process.” She says jokingly as both you and Henry chuckle.

Patting his thigh affectionately, you smirk, “He’s a tough old bear, but yeah, it was awesome having you talk to us.”

“Yes, take care now.” Adds Henry while the interviewer Lauren stands, saying her goodbyes as she goes to exit the room.

The camera crew take a small break to adjust things and whatnot as you and Henry wait patiently for the next interviewer. He turns, an adorable smile pulling at his lips while you pretend to ignore his fiery gaze. “Well that went pretty well, minus the fact that I’m on Kal poop duty for a week...but uh...” He leans in close to you now, “I missed you all morning.”

Breaking out into a smile you raise a brow, “Boring without me huh?”

“Always.”

You casually shrug, “I figured as much. Don’t worry, we have a hotel all to ourselves tonight.” Your brows wiggle suggestively causing your blue eyed lover to shake his head with amusement.

“Say it louder next time.” He jokes.

Side eyeing the oblivious crew you begin to speak a couple octaves louder, “Henry I can’t wait to fu..” Suddenly his hand presses against your mouth before you’re able to call any attention to yourself. He gives you a warning look before slowly pulling his hand from your mouth.

You grin mischievously, “I wasn’t gonna say that...”

“Sure Y/N,” He mutters in your ear as a new interviewer walks into the room and finds their chair, “and I’m wasn’t going to make you scream tonight.”

Your brows raise in surprise and admittedly slight arousal at his choice of wording in this room of all places. Eyeing him up, face still showing surprise, you finally break out into a satisfied smirk. “You know what? I think you should consider changing your offer.”

He thinks deeply for a moment, though you know he’s only pretending to get you riled up, “Hrmm...maybe, possibly, should I? Should we? You are my co-star after all, that wouldn’t be very professional now would it Y/N?” He states with a shit eating grin, all done while the crew and interviewer get ready, minding their business and completely unaware to yourself and Henry’s teasing.

Scoffing playfully you lightly swat his arm, “We are way past being professional.”

He chuckles, looking from you to the rest of the room, “Oh, they have no idea.”

[shardsofthebroken]

Henry Creel and D&D

Do... Do you guys think Henry would have loved d&d. How would it have affected his mental health? Or would it have entered his life too late? Damn do we ever see Eleven play d&d? She deserves it, too

I think... Eleven would start playing & have 0 idea what to do and what character to be because she’s never been let loose to just enjoy silly possibilities, like she’d probably start with a young elf girl (bonus easter egg but in french, El’s nickname “El” is elf instead for some reason lol) with a buzzcut and uhh prob the cursed/psychic background whichever it is where the character is haunted by some supernatural deep sated evil that scars them, if not then a military background I’d say. Or wait it’s the first edition of D&D isn’t it, are there even any backgrounds- ANYWAYS- But then eventually she’d make like, a femme halfling mage that always wears huge dresses and has a speech quirk and is called Buttercup or something. Max plays a no-nonsense but sassy barbarian-warrior and she sticks with the same character for every one shots (she can’t handle anything but one shots bc it gets way too long and convoluted for her taste) and by now she’s like level 10 or smth (which is high in d&d).

But Henry... With Henry I have two thoughts, either he starts off vicariously trying to make the best, most powerful version of himself and it’s very uuuh... True neutral alignment if I’m being generous. In the sense that “the ends justifies the means” and he doesn’t care about pretend people’s lives or fictional morals. He’d play a sorcerer probably, a tiefling or human, and he throws away the main quests to follow the odd tiny details the DM didn’t think twice about, all in a personal mission to gain artefacts and influence, and become the most powerful in the lands. He both arrogant but tense (aka stressed). Very invested in the outcome, but prideful that his choices are the best, missing the point that choices are just that, choices from an infinite pool. His character would eventually die an ungraceful death and Henry is both shocked and enraged, but the DM is wise and Henry has lived a very thought-provoking experience indeed.

Second idea is in en environment where Henry feels more at ease, where he truly sees it as a game, a means of entertainment, and/or thought experiment rather than a way to (subconsciously or not) vicariously have power and control over his life, satiate inner issues & insecurities and plan war strategies. He’d be a druid from an hermit background and probably seeks to unravel the mysteries of the main plot, as well as explore various places and details he takes an interest in. He never has anyone else in his party, a lone guy, but that doesn’t mean he minds npcs. He even gets attached to some, probably even eventually brings one or two alongside him in quests. With that kind of fantasy secluded world from the rest of his life, I think he’d progressively allow himself more self-indulgence. He’d start helping npcs where he can, because why not, break them out of jails in dungeons and going to their rescue against monsters. There’s no reward, but strangely he has found that it can make him feel good to do so, or that it gives him a sour taste in his throat to leave the misfit young boy behind to die. And maybe when that same boy ends up murdering his family, he is silently very pleased with it, but he’s taken aback when others mourn the deaths and violence, and when the boy makes an enemy out of Henry’s character, too, emotions swirl. And he wants to leave it all to go back to his seclusion, but he has something other than himself to fight for now, too. [This prob sounds too on-the-nose for a subplot of a campaign he’d end up playing, but that literal plotline happened in the first d&d campaign I’ve ever played sooo... That wasn’t even my intention lmao] The campaign ends and he’s surprised when the DM closes the book. "That can’t be it."  "Can’t it?" "Can I... Can we play another campaign? Please?"

Hehehe... I have fanfic thoughts. The labs start a new, recurring one-on-one experiment. One for psychological observation, and of intellectual, situational testing. The kids get to play d&d. "As a new play activity", Papa says. Henry knows Papa lies, but games are to be cherished in this prison. For this I imagine him to be younger yeah, more in the midst of the trauma than set in his ways... Adult Henry would def be way too distrustful to even reluctantly engage genuinely imo. In this, he’d def end up hyperfixating on the d&d he plays, aka the 1 good thing in his life. And Papa could use that, too, like "If you can’t do this much, then you won’t be getting your hour in the d&d room." and man, an hour for d&d is already way less than enough. And he always hungers for the new horizons it gives him. (/pos) Henry would end up using his powers to mold/craft d&d figurines! :]  Idk if the DM would get special clearance to bring him materials, or if he’d make them out of staff tools that he’d steal, or if he’d get by by making them from little things like color pencil wood, or the little round things that they move in the exercice-game we see Eleven use in the show. He’d eventually want to make his own figurine for his character, wanting to mold it exactly as he sees him in his mind, which is important to him (the one thing he has control over at that point in his life). And he could turn it into a hobby! Make multiple poses, make higher and higher quality ones. A creative outlet, and a healthier way to hone his powers for sure lol! I’d imagine the labs wouldn’t have gotten the best d&d material out there, so the character and enemy figurines/pawns as well as the maps would be very minimal I think. There are multiple ways you could imagine the DM, a benevolent and wise, truly man who’s unfortunately working for a shady organisation, even if the task he does is harmless/does bring good to the kids’ lives. Or if he’s cold, calculated, emotionally detached/distant, the executioner and observer of the experiment, always thinking of how to challenge the kids in his campaigns and what useful data that could bring. But... I really do enjoy the thought of Henry getting a decent mentor figure. I love the “good and caring, but still ambiguous morally and has to be some level of cold and detached due to his job and how they’re, of course, always monitored” take, and I think since the labs are the one to hire him and all, it couldn’t be much better than that realistically. I think in many ways, Henry could easily connect with that attitude of his (especially since it’d be very similar to Peter Ballard’s vibe and situation), even if at that moment he’s a bit too young to really get it, but still desillusionized and on survival mode enough to understand that the man isn’t as genuine as his friendly facade would like him to believe, and that he has his agenda too, like every other staff in that place. I might develop the lab DM guy as a Stranger Things oc and actually write that fanfic lol... And hey, maybe he could convince Papa to let his d&d sessions with Henry be monitored if he makes reports, because Henry refuses to engage with the game otherwise! So many fun stuff to play with here

Tldr: In the labs, dnd would def be good escapism <3 better than murderous cynicism hah. And once he’s out, it’d be a good way to actually work through things now that he’d have the chance to I think, and also just a nice hobby overall to enjoy of course.

I truly believe that if Henry could have had better coping mechanism like d&d, he’d have been better for it and like, could have seen an alternative. Options. Other choices than becoming the dark overlord of evil. Because that’s the life mission he latched onto when he could find nothing else. Nothing. When no one else would allow him to become anything but. But in a world where he can be anyone, become anything, a world of possibilities, which is the very base of what D&D was made to be, he could find new doors opened, have experiences he could never had had in the labs, or even before in his limited world where everyone shunned him to take as little place as possible. He’s finally allowed to live and let live, and his horizons get expanded upon and he learns lessons that shake his world view to the very core. Possibilities. He has access to endless possibilities.

You know what. Henry deserves to get reincarnated as an average spider and live a life, that is all. I wish that for him. Gghdcbhd no- no I’ve got it. The therapy that Henry needs is farming simulator games. Give him Harvest Moons and Stardew Valleys and Rune factories. I’m a longtime Rune Factory stan, the therapeutic peace is unrivaled, Henry would looove how the game is endless, you can rise to like, level 1000 if you play enough hours I think. He’d get monster barns full of all the spiders and bugs he can find. And he’d spend days fishing and farming, and make friends with all the townsfolks <3 Does he have a waifu or husbando? Maybe perhaps >:] But in general I like the thought of Henry healing without romance, and learning to be at peace by his lonesome, and a relaxing daily routine that is his own. Very cottagecore, lone recluse living on the edge of town and comes by every day to get his bread and greet everyone. Bless.

I think Henry, once he gets past his trauma response of "this world isn’t for the weak and I’m not weak so I will not allow myself to relax and play games and be vulnerable and have fun", could get to play dnd and farm sim games, and learn a type of freedom and way of life from them, because what he desperately wanted and needed was, beyond everything, just to live a peaceful life free of burdens and judgement, where he could be anyone and be liked. Where he could, for once, be accepted and just be. And farming sims & dnd are 100% that  

[mystical-flute]

All is Calm, All is Bright

Merry Christmas, @sassyandclassy94! I was your Secret Santa! I hope you enjoyed this Teen Swanfire Christmas with Henry!

Also on AO3 || FFN

The cold, Bostonian winter was howling outside, snow covering everything it could reach. It was a far cry from last Christmas, when they’d been in Tallahassee and Henry had only been four months old. They hadn’t had much then, just a small, light up statue of a tree and a few crudely wrapped gifts from the kind old couple next door. It hadn’t been much, but with a four month old, Emma hadn’t exactly been sure what they should have done.

Now, though…

Bing Crosby’s voice warbled through the large CD player, twinkling lights they’d snagged at a garage sale were draped across the doorways of the small apartment, and a tiny, three-foot Christmas tree was tucked in the corner, a mishmash of cheap ornaments and lights dangling from it. The topper was a precariously perched Super Mario star plush Neal had scored at a resale shop the day after they learned they were going to be parents.

Henry, despite being a newborn, had cried the minute Neal showed it to him, so it had been put away for the rest of the year. Emma had made a joke that he wouldn’t be one for video games, much to her chagrin.

Thankfully, when they’d put it on top of the tree this year, Henry had been too distracted by the pretty lights to notice it.

It wasn’t much, but it was something, and for Henry’s second Christmas, that was all Emma could ask for. Henry wouldn’t remember it anyway, and hopefully by the next year, she and Neal would be able to give him a bigger Christmas tree and more gifts than the two sets of clothes and small teddy bear she’d bought with her Christmas bonus. She hoped she would be able to give Neal more than the couple of worn books she’d found too.

She wouldn’t trade her life for the world, but a little more money wouldn’t hurt, if for nothing else, for the ability to give Henry what he deserved - which was a much better Christmas than she or Neal had ever had, and while that wouldn’t be a stretch, Emma’s goals seemed to be a little too lofty given their current financial state. The $20,000 they’d gotten from the watches hadn’t stretched as far as they’d hoped, with Henry’s unexpected arrival and the eventual move to Boston. Even though they were making more with their new jobs, it still wasn’t exactly everything she’d hoped.

She let out a soft sigh and kissed the wispy hairs on Henry’s head. “Sorry we can’t do things the way you see on TV, Henry. But at least we’re together, right?”

Or, they should be together, but Neal was taking an awfully long time running errands, which, given it was the week of Christmas, wasn’t too surprising, but as the minutes ticked on, Emma grew more and more concerned.

“Where do you suppose your Papa is?” Emma asked Henry softly as ‘White Christmas’ began to play in the background. “It’s not like him to be this late, is it? Especially without a call or a text.”

Henry let out a babble, reaching for the stuffed lamb on the table, which she handed him. He was happy and safe, and that was all that mattered.

The sound of keys turning in the lock had her glancing over as Neal stumbled in the door, covered in snow. His arms were laden with gifts and groceries.

“Neal, what is all this stuff?” she asked with wide eyes, lifting Henry into her arms and following him to the kitchen.

“One of the guys at work was talking about an Adopt-A-Family program the high school was doing. I guess it was the band’s idea and a bunch of other clubs jumped on board with it too, so I signed us up, and then…” he said, gesturing to the bags of food. “There was a food pantry down the street. I tried to get some Christmas staples for us. They threw in some softer foods too, that we can have Henry try.”

Emma stared as Neal began unpacking the bags. “Wait - so all of this stuff was given to us? You didn’t steal it?”

“Emma, we barely got away with the watches. Do you really think I’d be able to get away with all of this if I stole it?”

“I guess not…” she said, glancing into the pantry. She couldn’t remember the last time it looked so full. She then set Henry down in his high chair and began to look through the bags of gifts. She saw toys - some she had enviously looked at in some of the stores - clothes, but what caught her attention was the red leather jacket - an adult’s sized jacket - laying at the bottom of one of the bags.

“Neal, why do I see an adult’s jacket?” she questioned.

He turned and closed the fridge. “Adopt-A-Family isn’t just for kids. They ask what the adults need or want too. I told them you needed a new coat, but weren’t into the super girly stuff. I guess that’s what they got you. Is that okay?”

Emma ran her hand along the smooth leather. “All of this is for us?” she whispered. “But why?”

Neal shrugged. “People like to help out around the holidays. I wouldn’t question it.”

It was a dream come true, which in Emma’s experience usually meant there was a catch somewhere. That a shoe would drop and everything would go to hell… and she was scared that would happen now.

“Emma,” Neal said, breaking her from her thoughts. “Everything is okay. This is a good thing. The Adopt-A-Family is anonymous, unless we sign and send them a thank you card. The food drive was at St. Peter’s, run by a group of nuns. They aren’t going to chase us down either - helping people like us is what they do.”

Emma sighed, then glanced at the bags of gifts again, and thought of the food they now had. “I guess this means we can skip grocery shopping this week. We can put our money into savings…”

“The nuns said we’re free to come back to the pantry at any time,” Neal said. “We just have to call them and tell them we’re coming.” To make his point, Neal pulled a card out of his pocket and stuck it to the fridge with a magnet. “Hey, I know you’re not used to this - accepting help without strings attached, but I know we can trust these nuns.”

She’d been to a private school once, at one of her foster homes, and the Mother Superior had been charged with embezzlement the year after, so she glanced up at Neal and raised a brow.

He sighed. “These are different nuns, Emma. And the toys came from teenagers with big hearts - ”

“ -or that need extra credit.”

“So what? Them needing extra credit doesn’t hurt us in any way. We get new stuff, Henry gets food in his stomach and a proper Christmas, and some random teenager bumps their grade from a B to an A and pleases their overbearing parents. Win-win for everyone involved, right?”

“I guess…” Emma replied, looking at the bags of gifts again. “It’ll be nice to see stacks of presents under the tree, right? And we’ll have normal looking pictures of Henry opening them, with a bow on his head…”

Neal smiled. “We can pick up wrapping paper tomorrow.”

Emma looked at their small Christmas tree, imagining the brightly-colored wrapped gifts beneath it, and felt her worries ease and her smile grow larger. “Yeah! Oh Neal… I can’t believe it’s really happening. A proper Christmas, with people that I love and who love me…”

Henry let out what must have been the baby version of a yell, distracting both of them.

“It’s five o’clock. He must be hungry. We’ve got leftover spaghetti, right?”

“In the fridge,” Emma confirmed, going to tend to Henry, and the small apartment was lighter with the promise of a happy, brighter Christmas.

On December 25th, they were awoken just after dawn by a fussy Henry. They took him into the living room where Neal switched on the tree, illuminating the room in the pretty multitude of colors and catching Henry’s attention immediately.

“You like the colors, Henry?” Emma giggled, holding one of the gifts out to him. “Look! I think Santa brought you something special!”

She had no idea if Henry was comprehending ‘Santa’, but he squealed in excitement and took the gift from her hands, tiny fists ripping at the paper anxiously, to her amusement, while Neal snapped pictures behind them with their beat up digital camera. They would take family photos with her old Polaroid.

After presents and breakfast, they lounged on the couch, watching A Christmas Story and White Christmas. Henry hadn’t taken his eyes off either, but had appeared to like the music and dancing in White Christmas more than the comedy of A Christmas Story.

“What do you think, Henry? Do you want to become a famous Broadway singer and dancer? Maybe perform at a ski lodge in Vermont?” Neal asked, swaying with Henry as the final notes of White Christmas rang through the apartment.

Henry laughed and squirmed in the grip, clearly wanting to dance on his own, so Emma switched on the CD player, setting it to the radio, where all Christmas music would be playing all day. Neal set him down, and they laughed as Henry bobbed along to Jingle Bell Rock. Emma couldn’t remember the last time her heart felt so light - so free.

They had a feast that night for dinner - well, in their eyes, it was a feast. Ham steaks, mashed potatoes, roasted carrots, and cupcakes she and Henry had made for dessert (well, she had made the cupcakes and dabbed some frosting on Henry’s nose so she could get a funny picture).

And when Henry was down for the night, she and Neal snuggled together on the couch, the music low as they watched the snow fall gently over the city.

“This was the best Christmas ever,” Emma said softly. “We got to give Henry the first Christmas he deserved.” The first Christmas they all had deserved, really.

He held her close. “I know. After so long, it feels impossible, but we’ve finally done it, baby. We might not be in Tallahassee, but we are home.”

And there was nowhere she’d rather be.