#ALSO I STILL DONT HAVE MY CAR AND IM PISSED ABOUT THAT TOO

[sharkieboi]

>have appointment with psychiatrist

>get perscribed meds for adhd

>make 3-week follow up to get bloodwork and see how meds are working

>hell yeah

>pharmacy requires prior authorization

>call doctor to get that

>receptionist says they couldn’t reach the pharmacy so apparently I’M the one who has to call them

>on hold with pharmacy for over an hour before they literally pick up the phone and then immediately hang up

>no ability to get to pharmacy in person to demand things cause car is in the shop and no bus routes go right to the pharmacy and then also me being out of town to visit family on my weekend and no time/energy to go after work

>gives up cause adhd

>get notices that my appointment is coming up but still haven’t been able to get meds so what would we even be assessing

>sends impatient message to doctor that no i will not be coming to the appointment because i haven’t actually GOTTEN the medication

>actual doctor (not receptionist) calls again while i’m in a room full of screaming parrots but I do somehow manage to get point across to her and tell her SHE needs to call the pharmacy cause they keep hanging up on me

>insurance calls less than an hour later to say it’s been approved

>me: 🫠

[buntobeans]

delirious venture after tooth surgery

warnings: blood, venture is like HIGH from anesthetic nothing much else

idk if anyone has written this but it's so cute seeing all those videos with people after surgeries being absolutely ZOOTED and having no idea what planet they're on

also i am NOOTTTT a dentist by any means im just going off of my fanfic delirium.... it's 4am this is a pretty bad work but i GAWT TO BE ON MY VENTURE GRINDSET

sooo we all know how sloan has a chipped tooth, right? not entirely sure what it's from, their chipper highlight intro or them eating a rock- either one is funny as hell

to say you freaked out was an absolute understatement, there was blood everywhere and sloan was just looking at you like:

:D

"amor, look what i found!" they hold up the rock in their hands so proudly like a cat that's brought back a dead mouse

"SLOAN, YOU'RE LITERALLY BLEEDING."

you force them to drop the rock/artifact or leave it with the wayfinders, ensuing in a very pouty sloan

one trip to the emergency room later sloan is ZOOTED

literally space ranger the way they are NOT on earth

you go to pick them up, they're in the waiting room

you're relieved by the fact that they're okay but you're absolutely not prepared for what comes next

the medical staff informs you that they're very out of it, slyly adding along that you must be "the partner with (e/c) eyes that sparkle in the sunlight"

the what

you enter the room to see them having an extremely animated conversation to anyone that will listen, whether it's the doctors or the potted plant on the table next to their seat

as soon as they namedrop you you feel extremely embarrassed

they're describing your exact appearance (like if you have brown hair, none of that brunette shit, they're saying "they have #5C4033 hair")

they describe your first meeting and first date in way too specific detail and the middle-aged lady next to them in the waiting room is just like "uh huh yeah if this mf dont stop talking they're gonna be in the emergency room AAGGAAAIN"

"SLOAN SHUT UP"

your partner takes a GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOU

like 30 seconds of just gaping, you really can see their chipped tooth in its full glory

"sloan, we're going home"

they gulp and stare up at you like their big wet eyes

"i can't go home with you"

"why not"

"my partner will get jealous"

"."

"by the way, my partner has the prettiest smile. i miss them" they're looking so sad as they said that, like you fucking died

YOU'RE RIGHT THERE

"sloan.."

"whoa.. how'd you know my name?"

"i AM your partner"

they blink

it's like they're seeing you for the first time again

their eyes are sparkling and they look like they're falling in love all over again

they give you a crooked smile, kind of slumping back in their seat cause you took their breath away, cheeks hotter than before

"hey there!"

you're exhausted from worrying over them and their tooth but they're looking at you like you're the most radiant being in the world- no- the universe

"oh dios mio.. see i was tryna be loyal but you came in looking really pretty and i thought (for only a second i promise, like, one second!) about cheating.. thank goodness we're together tho"

what

your heart does a few flips in your chest

suddenly you're kinda pissed that they had to get injured in their mouth because you want to sloppily make out with this rock munching idiot

the car ride home is almost abysmal

they're belting out stupid songs, randomly screaming deez nuts jokes even when you don't fall for them then cackling at themselves because it's funny to THEM, mumbling things in spanish you don't understand (you swear you hear a "te amo" in there)

it's stressful as HELL for you because you have to constantly check that their seatbelt is still on because they're excitedly looking out the window like a dog with its tongue out

they're also randomly shouting and pointing out shit outside like they're playing road trip bingo

you're thankful when they quiet down eventually until you hear

"Can we get married? I proooomise I'll take care of you.." They sniffle. "I've got the moneeeyy.. 'n I really think you were made f'me.. I jus' wan' t'be t'gether forever... I loooove youuuu..."

you nearly crash the car

JESUS SLOAN

you tend to them at home and it seems like all their object permanence has vanished

gone from this world

because whenever you leave the room to get them water that THEY REQUESTED, they start crying

"AMOR, WHERE DID YOU GO"

they regain their senses the next day and you realize

it's not REALLY that different

they're still a goober

though with less (full) teeth than before

but they're your goober :)

still, using that little marriage speech against them has them flustered because they've really been thinking about it, it wasn't just a whim from their anesthetic-fueled delirium

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

too many teens whining for validation, this blog needs more weird and stupid so...

AITA for kidnapping my friend and trapping her in the cheesebarn?

Hear me out:

The story starts about a week before my (20 at the time ftm) 21st birthday. If you live in the US you know this isnt just some lame 7th birthday or 36th birthday, this is one of the big boy birthdays, the special ones. Its when you can legal buy alcohol and are therefore truly an adult in the eyes of the law.

Naturally my friends (20s) wanted to do something Big for our 21sts. So they asked me what i wanted to do and i said i didnt really care as long as I got a road trip somewhere with friends.

Everyone thought it was a fun idea but it was a little short notice for everyone to get time off from work, but my other friend we will call C also had her 21st exactly a month after mine to the day, and the two of us agreed to share our 21sts and not do much of anything on my actual birthday. This is important, bc it was a SHARED birthday road trip.

I agree to let C pick the destination and I provide the car. We didnt have much of a plan as we were going to meet up with C's old roommate who lives in the city we picked to show us a good time.

It was 5 of us total and about a 7 hour drive altogether there with not a whole lot on the way there. We get to the city she picked and meet the roommate and honestly the rest of this part is just standard 21st birthday shenanigans. Its when we start the drive home things really start.

Remember its a long drive with not much to see? Well that was a lie. On our way back we see it, the Real "Happiest Place on Earth" as far as places with a mouse for a mascot go:

Grandpa's.

Fuckin'.

Cheesebarn.

Obviously me and the other people on the trip want to stop and see the magic, but unfucking fortunately C happens to be the only Basic White Girl ™️ in the entire world who hates cheese and isnt even lactose intolerant. This girl is notorious for making "petty" and "I hate Cheese" her entire personality. She would constantly make faces and gagging noises and talk about how gross and nasty cheese is if you so much as eat a grilt cheese near her.

Clearly she made it known that she wasnt on board with it. "NO! FUCK YOU ALL IM NOT GOING TO A PLACE CALLED A CHEESEBARN ON MY BIRTHDAY!!" were her exact words.

But i remembered i was driving, it was my car, and it was supposed to be my birthday too. So I put it to a vote. "Raise your hand if you wanna go to Grandpa's Cheesebarn!"

All hands raise but one. With C out voted we head to the cheesebarn.

Guys. This place is amazing. Its obviously making cheese its main draw, but yhere's so much more, its every shitty midwest tourist trap rolled into one glorious place. There's even a chocolate shop. We even got C's roommate to ditch work and come meet us bc shr heard "Grandpa's Cheesebarn" and knew she had to drop everything.

All in all a good visit, C even seemed like she had fun once we got there (she sure spent $300 on candies and dip mixes anyway). We go home. Things seem fine.

Then C drops off the face of the earth.

She wont respond to our calls or texts and at first we thought maybe she was giing through a rough patch or something and try to just keep reaching out but give her space. But then we find out that not only is she still hanging our with our other friends who couldnt make the trip with us. So clearly she's just pissed at us about something.

Finally one day a few months later i catch her at her job and just tell her "I dont care if you hate us, we'll never speak to you again if you dont want us to, but what the hell did we do to you??"

And she just looked me over and says "Well. You kidnapped me."

lolwut

And she yells (bc this girl loves yelling at people) "YOU KIDNAPPED ME AND TRAPPED ME AT A CHEESEBARN ON. MY. BIRTHDAY!!!!!"

And i just said "Well it was my birthday too," and havent spoken to her since. Its been over a decade and "No ragrets" as we said back in the day, but uts baffled me for years that that was her reaction. "Im just over you guys" i can understand, and its not like she was shy about telling people she hates them and their out of her life ever before. And from what i ended up hearing from our other friends she kept talking with it really was about the cheesebarn and how we "ruined her birthday".

No but srsly AITA??? For making her go to a cheesebarn???

What are these acronyms?

[crushedsweets]

OK I NEED TO CLEAR MY ASKBOX

IM JUST GONNA ANSWER A TON OF THEM HERE SO I DONT CLOG UP MY FEED....

hi >.<

this is so fucking sweet i remembered how happy i was when i first got my car. i cried everyday for a week straight because i was so happy. very glad yall got to watch me get my first car. i spend over an hour in her every day commuting now. LMFAOOO (i named her lindsay btw) ((after tdi lsinday)). im so sorry im late but thank you so much this meant sm !!! <3

you asked me this in august im evil oh my god. anyway i aagree. but i am always inclined to forever think he's a midwest emo guy. twin sized mattress forever

SHE NEEDS AND DESERVES SO MANY.

im immediately inclined to say clocky or toby the second i see time and fire mentions. so ticciwork. my clocky is often a bit messy so she'd be pissed and angry and upset over the sort of war she's found herself in, especially as she sees toby just falling deeper into it. 'my god, was i oblivious?' when she finally realizes toby will always, always put Slenderman before her. frustrating. 'hell stays hungry for a world so weak' natalie is hungry for a good world, but she thinks everyone is too weak for goodness, meanwhile toby is hungry for power so he can make everyone else seem weak. etc. 'they only want you to bleed' they being slendy, operator, zalgo, etc etc etc... power, being a pawn, fighting, using humans as toys in a battlefield, etc etc.. yeah

RELEASE ME JOEY

i genuinely think nina is a really good influence on so many of the creeps. like theyre all assholes, traumatized, refuse to believe in the good in the world, etc etc. but nina is traumatized and still kickin. she comes in like ^_^ hello chat. and i think that, while its still important to feel the shitty feelings, it's really grounding to see someone whos just so .. able to be happy. idk. someone who SEEKS joy, rather than expects it to fall into their lap, and blames the world when it doesnt

this si perfect idk why i forgot about bats for him. gotta get back into this idea

AHHH OK I WILL DO MORE EVENTUALLY i just wanna say thank yewww i think theyre such a good sibling dynamic. like little brothers and big sisters and both being little assholes to eachother but would die for the other. idk. ugh. important to me.

actually this sounds really sweet..... thats funny cuz i was JUST talking to a friend about who i would have EJ go endgame with if i had to, but i couldnt settle on anyone. but liu seems like a good fit for ej. i think they'd be super sweet

ANON ME TOO AHHHH ITS LITERALLY MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING EVER. I DONT GAF ABOUT EVIL MEAN 'CANON' SLENDER I LOVE WHEN HE'S A DAD AND WORRIES AND STRESSES. IEPFB AND KASTOWAYS SLENDY>

AH THANK YOU!!! he reminds me of my little cousins HAHA theyre like 10-14 right now and theyre all cuties.... just playing roblox and being mischievous...

THIS IS ABOUT THE BLUSHING NAT DRAWING ISNT IT AHAH OMG THANK YOU!!! i think shes so cute. i know she cant handle compliments. she's either deadpanned 'thanks' or just covers her face and says 'shut up' cuz she doesnt know what to do.

I LOVE HER TOO!!!

GOOD NEWS THEN ive drawn her a handful of times since u sent this HAHA TYSM

you sent like... natobina i think... ok tbh kinda slaps

OK REAL but also when i read it i keep reading it as 'cochina' and i cannot bring myself to name the throuple that </3 HAHA

TBH AHAHA I SEE IT. TOBYS AMETHYST GARNETS NATALIE AND NINA IS STEVEN.

i want jeff to ache in his loneliness

i need to draw connie asap but also THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR THE CAR CONGRATS I REALLY APPRECIATE IT IM SO HAPPY I LOVE MY CAR SO MUCH i gotta go vaccuum her..

shes such a cat to me. feline. of sorts, if you will

also good news for you anon, i have also drawn her an ungodly amount of times since youve sent this. LOL

THEYRE MY ANGELS I HAVE MORE OF THEM !!! I LOVE THEM!! AHHHGGG

literally the second that people tell me i made them start to like clocky i am overwhelmed with joy. i feel so much ache when people aren't fond of her bc shes so fucking cool and such a good character and so much fun. so sad that 2015 era creepypasta fandom destroyed her. but im here to fix it...

IM SORRY ANON I BARELY DRAW HIM HES JUST SO BOYISH I LAUGH EVERYTIME I SEE HIM FKAHAHAAH OK OKOK ILL CHANGE ILL DRAW HIM I SWEAR

I REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST STARTED DOING EMOJI ANONS BAHAHA u guys r funny

incredibly. happy. to do this to u.

nope! im not too interested in the 2021 nina just cuz i feel like i've seen that character concept many times (not just in jane), BUT if i had to do my own intepretation of her, 2021 nina would be INCREDIBLY immature in like. not a childish way, but an entitled, angry-fueled adult who cannot comprehend anyone else's thoughts/feelings. and thus, would despise OG nina (although within reason, OG nina idolizes the person who killed her family) . but even if there wasnt a good reason to dislike OG nina, she'd be mean. and OG nina would be mad and bitch. and theyd theyd fight. HAHA

I-IF...???????? ANON?

HELD TO THE FUCKING BRIM

[burntb4bydoll]

CAN YOU DO A GUSTAV SMUT ON WHERE HIS LIKE JEALOUS AND YELLS AT READER BUT THEN HE FEElS BAD AND So HE MAKES IT UP BY YK 😈

YALL JUST LIKE ME FR IM A WHORE FOR SOME JEALOUS SMUT

Gustav Schafer x fem!reader

Warnings: oral (fem!receiving), hair pulling, hickeys, fingering, jealous Gustav🤭

The car ride home was silent, Gustav wouldn’t talk to you no matter what you said. You knew he was mad but you didn’t think he was that mad. As you drove home, you could feel him getting more and more frustrated but he still wouldn’t tell you what his problem was.

Once you got home he immediately headed for the bedroom, completely ignoring your presence. You stormed into the room after him and demanded to know why he was acting like that.

“You’re seriously gonna pretend you don’t know? I don’t believe for a second that you didnt do that on purpose to piss me off.” He raised his voice at you and you could feel yourself growing confused.

“Gustav, what are you talking about? What did I do?” He takes a step closer to you, still giving you dirty looks.

“The whole night that guy was flirting with you and you let him! You were flirting back too! Im not stupid, y/n.” your eyes stung with tears as he yelled the accusations at you. He seemed to notice because his face was suddenly wiped of all anger, leaving him with a remorseful expression. “Y/n Im sorr-“

“No. Since you think I’m flirting with other guys, I’ll just go sleep on the couch. Have fun being a dick.” You turn to walk away from him but his hand catches your wrist,

“No, no. I’m sorry. I was just jealous and I took it out on you…” he turns your hand and presses a soft kiss to your knuckles. He pulls you closer and holds the side of your neck gently. “I’m really sorry. I should’ve listened to your side of the story first. Im gonna make it up to you..”

“…how?” You were still upset but you couldn’t deny that you were curious about what he was gonna do. Gustav smiles and lifts you off the ground by your waist. “Gustav!” You yelped, grasping his shoulder out of shock. Laughing, he tosses you on the bed and starts to kiss your neck. Lust clouds your mind as he sucks harsh hickeys onto your neck, marking you as his.

“Gonna eat your pretty pussy baby..” your eyes widen at his vulgar words, a soft gasp escaping your lips. His hands quickly pull of your pants, and he groans at the sight of your soaked panties. (I fucking hate that word im sorry) You’re basically putty in his hands already, and you can feel heat rushing to your face in embarrassment of how quickly he can turn you on. His lips kiss your in thighs for minute before sucking more hickeys onto the sensitive skin. After he decides that he’s marked you up enough he pulls your underwear down your legs, leaving your bottom half naked. You can feel his gaze on you as his fingers trail over your bare cunt.

“Gustav…please dont tease.” You beg, hip thrusting up to try and get some friction against his large hand. He smirks and giggles at your needy voice,

“Ok honey, im sorry. Ill give you want you want.” With that, he dives his head down to start lapping at your wetness. Your body jolts and you quickly uses one of your hands to tug his face closer by his hair. He moans into you, sending vibrations through your body.

“Fuck…you’re so good! S-so good..” your rambling is silenced once he slips his fingers inside of you, making you moan instead. What you don’t realize is how hes also getting off on this. To him, this is a way of claiming you. He wants everyone to know that you’re his, and only his. The thought of everyone knowing who you belong to is enough to make him rut into the bed and groan into your pussy.

“You’re mine. No one else can have you, my good girl.” Your body shivers and you sigh at the possessive tone of his voice being muffled my your cunt. His free hand reaches up your body to hold your hips against the mattress, trying to stop you from squirming. You can feel your orgasm sneaking through your body, making your thighs squeeze around his head.

“Gonna cum, please don’t stop. I need to cum so bad!” He didn’t say anything he just finger fucks you harder and sucks on your clit, watching as you cum on his face. He continues to pleasure you through your orgasm before sitting up and licking his lips. His face was covered in a mixture of your juices and his saliva. You rolled your eyes and giggled at the goofy smile he was giving you.

“You’re so pretty. I love you, my pretty girl.”

[andromerot]

my pedro almodóvar marathon. thoughts, feelings, tier list

or, i spent like 50 hours on this so i better get to post about it

well, i'd be lying if i said i set out to do this with any clear goals in mind. i sort of just wanted to watch movies. this year i set out to watch through a couple of directors entire works, but ran into complications or got bored. so anyway when i finished my term i decided id try a third time with my best friend pedro. i had watched five of his films already but was mostly unaware of other things he had made. on the 22nd of november i started with matador, then went on and in exactly a month i had watched all of his feature films yayyy

so this is how i ranked them on letterboxd and this is a tier list. this doesnt really sum up my thoughts though so im leaving a little review for each below the cut, in the order i watched them in this month hope someone cares :) thank you

matador (1986): ohhhhhh my god. absolutely unexpected how insane this movie made me. many people say its not very good, i dont think that's true. transgressive, erotic, camp, necrosexual, implicit faggot tension, beautiful costuming, insanely talented cast of so many characters sick in the head. watching this one first really hyped me up to keep at it and to close out the month i rewatched it the other day and though it was less surprising than the first time i watched it its maybe my favorite now :) it has structural flaws i suppose. but i love it

¿que he hecho yo para merecer esto? (1984): pretty funny! not bad at all, i remember enjoying it as i watched it, it just wasnt very memorable. i enjoy every performance by carmen maura, chus was stellar as always and forqué was really sweet in this one too, i liked it. i literally forgot half of the plot though. did anyone remember the telepathic child or the faked hitler diaries? i didnt until i looked it up.

la ley del deseo (1987) (rewatched): showed this one to my friend, god its iconic. some of my favorite chiques almodovar. so fun to watch and so silly even though its not quite a comedy. the fact that antonio is just called antonio in this one makes me unwarrantedly happy. MAURA THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE!! very hot all around. i think i liked it better this time than the other two i had watched it.

pepi, luci, bom y otras chicas del montón (1980): everyone talks about how sexually transgressive 80s almodovar is and i was like yeah whatever until i watched this one. straight up trilogy of trash shit. so beautiful. i wish every movie was like this. no one likes it but i adored it. erecciones generales will stay in my mind forever and i loved the musical numbers. and the piss, of course.

entre tinieblas (1983): also somewhat forgettable, though i watched it while pretty worried about something else so maybe i didnt give it the attention it deserved. its not a bad time but i wouldn't rewatch it. based on the premise you think it'd be better.

la flor de mi secreto (1995) (rewatched): OH GOD. until last month my favorite almodóvar, its been outdone but it still destroys me. its terribly underrated. i dont even know what i can say about it... marisa paredes is stunning at doing desperation. the boots, the scene at the protest, the initial meeting with ángel, the poem in the car, that moment in the hall. it's beautiful and breathtaking. lesbian film history, i promise.

todo sobre mi madre (1999): like, its good, but i dont get what people see in it that makes it so acclaimed. again paredes is great in this, but penélope is somewhat tame compared to what she does later, and this is the point in the list where i have to admit cecilia roth is not very good to me and all my compatriots start throwing rocks at me. listen i just wish she'd stop doing that stupid accent its so fucking bad cecilia sincerate seguro sos de villa crespo. anyway its fine if a bit weird about trans women, but hes always a hit or miss w that

átame (1989): took a big break between the last one and this one for some reason. anyway, pretty funny, except it really drags in the middle. shouldnt have been that long, but victoria abril always slays and the last scene is wonderful.

tacones lejanos (1991): WOAHHHHH! really cool i liked it. i love a mother daughter thing especially this mother and this daughter. really fun doppelganger story and i love how it was told, i found it both melodramatic and subtle? miguel bosé makes a really pretty girl, this will inform my every subsequent rewatch of suspiria. big fan of his gender. dance number fucked obvs

kika (1993) (rewatch): ok, i know why people don't like this one, but its so silly... cmon. it sillay. once again incredible abril performance, the costuming my god.... her character makes the whole movie i wish i was her. lesbian rossy de palma was wonderful and every forqué performance is a delight. pedro getting hitchcockian with it to slightly trick the audience is a staple of his 90s filmography, fucks.

carne trémula (1997): the title made me think it would be better! there was barely any carne. i didn't really see the point of most of it tbh, though based on how the movie starts and ends there might be some spanish historical context that im missing that makes it more interesting. strangely reminiscing of the buenos aires affair to me, but puig is better. yeah it was just pretty boring.

laberinto de pasiones (1982): YAYYYYYY i had some trouble torrenting so i watched it really out of order this but its SO FUN. obviously in the same vein as pepi luci bom but i liked it slightly more just for how unnecessarily elaborate it was. the one major role i dont mind roth being in and im a big fan of antonios gay terrorist with an ultradeveloped sense of smell character and arias is really into his very silly character too – he works well in secreto as well, i wish hed been on more almodovares, i should finally watch camila. liné was hilarious too. the problematic incest storyline was really funny to me sorryyyyy and i got a lot of gender out of the musical performances. hey can you believe that beautiful fag covered in blood is a franquista now. i can

hable con ella (2002): ehhhhhhh. some people really hate this one for the couple scenes i found most interesting, others love it for reasons i cant parse. its got parts that caught my attention a lot, but mostly it was eerie in an unenjoyable and uninteresting way and the backstories dragged on too long, especially grandinetti's. like i just don't care sorry. THE scene is quite disturbing though. i appreciated he decided to show rape in a more subtle light for once, it made it a lot more cruel and a lot more interesting.

la mala educación (2004) (rewatch): sighhhh. i really wish i liked this one. its got so many elements i am into – the colours are obviously spectacular, the unreliable multiple narrations and the disassembled timelines are always enjoyable to me, the attempt at social commentary is appreciated, some scenes are stunning (fictional ignacios head split in half is unforgettable) but quite honestly the characterization is so bad it bores me. i liked it more the first time i watched it just because of how confused i was, once i wasnt it lost its magic. maybe the worst in what is considered the "somewhat autobiographical movies about directors" trilogy (i think there's four of them but we'll discuss that later) probably because the character of enrique is so bland. i know its more but it feels that you only spend like five minutes with him. ángel/juan's motivations for anything are so puzzling, ignacio is just a caricature at this point and probably the character with the most depth is berenguer, which is ironic, i guess

volver (2006): WAHHH. its hard to talk about it honestly. it was so unexpectedly beautiful. the acting is so on point – penélope cruz and that beautiful carmen maura comeback are self evident, but blanca portillo is also stellar. it was fascinating from minute one and i couldnt keep my eyes off it. its written with such care and love. i suppose the plot itself is nothing out of this world, but the way it is handled is explosive. i really adored it.

los abrazos rotos (2009): the fourth bastard on the self insert series! cmon, its way more about himself than la mala educación. anyway, its good at some points, not very in others. the strong point is obviously the relationship between mateo, judit and diego, their refusal to be tied as a family and their desire to be tied by love is reaaaally interesting. the scene at the sea... but penélope and her millionaire and her millionaires son do nothing interesting at any point, im afraid to say. sad! surprisingly not very memorable, even though i didnt dislike it as i watched it. like i remember i liked some things but if a couple weeks later i dont remember what they were its probably the movies fault

la piel que habito (2011): AUGHHH OK. fuck. THIS ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD. it wasnt it was really mid. when it started i was like oh is pedro trying out his hand at cronenberg and i was really excited because im SURE he can do cronenberg better than cronenberg but he didnt. it was worse. how are you giving your women less agency than that guy??? honestly probably the first ever film of his where this is a noticeable problem, though penélope in the last one should give us a hint. ughh it should have been good. im mad about that. no desire to question gender or power and the unchronological storytelling does nothing for me. BAD! if anything i recognized its sexual power for if banderas character was a woman i would be throwing up and convulsing on the floor. i hope vicente and his lesbian coworker had a beautiful romance i guess. i cant believe some people call this one one of the most controversial of his work....

los amantes pasajeros (2013): hm well everyone was like THIS is the bad one and i was like i bet you guys are just being mean but no yeah this is the bad one. its not funny and it drags on so long...i can usually defend the rape scenes in his movies, even in kika or hable con ella, but this one just sucks so bad. i was prepared to defend this movie but i cant. as soon as the movie started i was trying to guess where all the threads would connect, how all the characters would be linked and they mostly... weren't? also the reference to the gazpacho scene in mujeres made me groan out loud.

julieta (2016): well i dont really know what this was supposed to be....it feels on the surface it could have been really good but something about it felt so emotionless. it was an odd experience, watching it, because i expected to be moved by so many scenes and i never was. i dont know what the point of it was.

dolor y gloria (2019): ok yeah this one was sweet! didn't blow my mind or anything but it was very cleverly made...a really more beautiful way to do the childhood-as-movie thing than in mala educación, i really enjoyed it. nostalgia bores me sometimes but i feel hes not being annoying about it. long live old man yaoi (and finally an argentinian actor i DONT hate...) and that beautiful beautiful cave and that mind gripping apartment bringing in the characteristic insane set design but in a new way...i had a good time

madres paralelas (2021): oh this could have been so good! it wasnt but honestly i dont remember exactly why i disliked it. i suppose i didnt connect to the characters and that it is a story that requires that to engage you – their motivations were really out of place and unlike other movies that bothered me. really interesting premise, didnt work out. im sad about it. could have been cool.

yeah so that's it i only realized while writing this that i forgot to rewatch mujeres but obvs that ones very good, proper classic, quote it every time i eat gazpacho and such. also extraña forma de vida is a snore i refuse to watch it again. i hope this works as a rec list for someone. and i am ready to be stoned by my wrong opinions by the rest of you

[cali]

Thoughts on shedding your human form and achieving digital godhood?

hello transhumanist anon i forgot i had your message here it was from yesterday. or the day before ?. well my first response to this is: you lost me at digital. i dont really want to be a coputer i think id like to live long but the framework ive built myself to live with puts too much importance on being human and such to want that. i used tohave troubles with being meat but im getting a lot better at that.

im gonna babble about my other type of um shedding human form troubles. ive talked about it a hundred times but i think everytime i retype it i think of something i hadnt typed before. tw unreality lol

you can scroll back over the last 3 years of my blog if u want to and u will see me having ideas of shedding bla bla bla a lot, i had panic attacks over it like infohazard type where if i started thinking about the concept of being in a not real world and being able to escape i would get scared.. cuz wat if the other side is scarier >_< lol u could relate the Tv glow movie really easily to that.

but i got kind of pissed at the idea cuz it and any other idea like it anytime i ever saw it get voiced (any eschaton type wishes, saving wishes) i kept looking at them and loathing the inaction of the recipient. there was never any doing in them themselves, only ever hoping for external force to save everything and i related it to me and thought ok dats escapism, i wanna act more myself in a world where i am. also , and ok if ur talking about robots this only applies halfway but if its like an mental ascension type deal then theres never any guarantee that if u part the veil of reality there wont be another veil just behind it. that was another point for my own pile of reasons as to why its useless to be a matrixhead. theres also the optics of that the people who get really into this are so often estremely stupid. theres like hundreds of videos online of guys filming out of their cars birds hovering, still in the middle of the air, cuz of a windstream. and theyre like the simulation birds are breaking. u could say all of these could be deterrents to finding the truth but then i got one final shining jewel for the pile: solipsism is gay

a lot of this stuff doesnt apply to transhumanist robot women or boys or anythings on the internet but its all drawing at a similar root way of combatting unhappiness. but also im not a transhumanist robot woman and i have only spoken to a couple and never too much about this so maybe theres factors that i dont know about that coul convince me otherwise ?! ?! ?!

[roe-and-memory]

Do you have any Mater headcanons? If so, can you tell us about it? He’s my childhood favorite, and he still is!

im gonna be completely honest.. we dont see him too much in our conversations 💔 BUT thats not saying we havent talked about him before!! we dont have many headcanons for him but there are a couple pretty silly ones i like

- i think he’s probably never.. properly serviced his truck. hes not a mechanic by any means, but he still tries to fix whatevers wrong with it (doing the bare minimum, of course) with ramones guidance. its sort of like one of those old abandoned cars you’d see left to rot on someones lawn or in their driveway, the interior is also bare minimum and the seats are destroyed, but mater argues it’s because it’s a well loved vehicle.

- he taught himself how to weld? he can make little things out of scrap metal — he welded sheriff’s gun to a toaster once and had to pay for a new one (his family is rich, he can handle it) and he made his own canon that he shoots things with

- wears jorts casually and unironically, thinks hes the pinnacle of fashion

- he doesnt know firework safety. or just any fire-related safety ever. he accidentally causes an oil fire and tells lightning to put it out with water - it promptly blows up in his face. he’s blown lightning up with fireworks on multiple occasions to. lightning is just very prone to colourful things that explode

- this one is self explanatory

- piss jokes are comedy fucking gold. nothing is better than piss jokes for him.

- repainting is futile, he tries it anyways and there are just Awful green splotches all over his truck, he says it gives it personality but ramone cringes every time he sees it. its an insult to him and his craft (painting cars)

again im so sorry we dont have anymore, this is the most i could think of at the moment 😭💔 I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THEM THOUGH

[saiiboat]

i’d love to hear about your fuga sailing stuff \o/

HII ^_^ awesome. ok. so atm i have one silly racing au that i rotate in my head and one fic in the works which takes place directly after fuga when guaxinim, pac, and mike leave the island together on the boat. this one is heavy on the hurt and lighter on the comfort and is essentially just pac on one massive spiral now that he's starting to process everything that happened in prison and the island. lots of pac feeling guilty about cell's perceived suicide and struggling with his anger at mike for getting them into this mess. he's very much an emotional wreck LOL. hes been through so fucking much man. also going from being enclosed in a prison for a year and a half and then being out on open water and the crazy anxiety of being in such an open space is. well. its really getting to him. i'll leave some snippets of it under the cut 💪💪💪

the racing au is really just silly⛵💪💪🔥🔥🔥the nature of the sailing autism being that i always need to take some guys and throw them on a racing team, all of their insanities included.

when i talked about this au before i said that they sailed j22s but im upgrading them. they now sail Melges 20s. its official. ill put images under the cut. god. gorgeous boats.

the general idea is that JV and cell are two sailors looking for new members for their respective crews. felps is already on cell's crew and guaxinim sails with JV. probably at some point jv was on cell and felp's crew and now they have some kind of crazy beef. anyways. cell is just as weird and gross and intense as he is in fuga and he really wants pac and mike on his crew and having nothing to do with JV. obviously mike is skeeved out by the weird gross guy who looks maybe a bit too hungry sometimes and tries to get pac to join JV's crew with him. unfortunately pac is way too enamored with cell's negative rizz and cell proposes the idea to pac that tazercraft splits ways and mike can join JV's crew on his own. Mike is understandably upset at this but still ends up joining JV and guaxi's crew. the two boats have insane tension and pac is torn between pretending none of this happened at all and ignoring mike/sending worlds saddest eyes back to mike. mike is hurt and pissed off at pac and cell and felps and does his best to pretend that they dont exist at all while also needing to beat them in every regatta ever or he'll DIE because maybe if he wins against them enough times it'll prove something to pac. what will it prove? i dont think even he knows lol.

cell is actively trying to drive a wedge in between pac and mike and JV is doing the same thing on the other side. felps is purposely looking the other way during all of this and guaxinim is watching it all go down with some sick sense of fascination. definitely just hanging around to watch it happen like a long drawn out car crash.

cell in this au is especially fascinating to me. squeezing him like a stressball. he's ten ways fucked in the head and the reason why he started sailing in the first place is because his therapist told him to get a hobby and it was downhill from there. anyways cell tells his therapist about pac and the next time cell sees pac he walks up to him and says "my therapist says that we need to get coffee together and have normal interactions so i stop thinking about eating you" and pac just goes. oh! and its the hottest thing anyones ever said to him

obsessed with them, frankly

^^ sexual images fr

[desert-horned-lizard]

so get this. its my day off. im just sitting in my house and for some reason i get the urge to look at my ducks. and as im looking something's really nagging at me. i suddenly realize they're not in a row. i dont know if they were always like that or if something knocked them out of the way or something. it doesnt matter. so im just sitting there like "shit, people are always saying its good to get those in a row." its my day off so of course i dont want to do it. i try to sit down and watch some movies but i cant stop thinking about. its pissing me off so bad i can barely concentrate. so i get up from the sofa and i start putting my ducks in a row. shit takes me hours. you wouldnt believe how how many ducks there were. do you have any idea how hard it is to get a single duck in row? let alone a fuckin flock of them? after a few hours my fuckin muscles are feeling weak, my bones are sore. im dreaming about a nice chicken dinner when im done with all this shit. thats how tired fucking tired i was. so fuckin beat i was dreaming about a chicken dinner. jesus christ. so i pick up the last duck, sighing with relief, and im about to put it in the row, when out of the corner of my eye i notice something on the bottom of the duck. im like what the fuckin shit is that. so i turn the duck over and there's a tiny little sticker. smallest shit you ever seen in your life. i get out my magnifying glass and start reading the fucker. right there, on the ass end of the duck, in print so fine a particularly quick amoeba could cross its width in a millisecond, written in an offensively inscrutable font, are the words "WARNING: WARRANTY VOID IF ALL DUCKS ARE PUT IN A ROW"

yeah.

......... you might think i would be angry, but honestly i mostly just felt defeated. for a minute it seemed like all the air got sucked out of the room. all that work. for jack shit. i tried to bargain with myself that the maybe warranty wasn't actually that important but it was no use. i just couldn't help but think about my sister. she had all her little ducks in a row, and everything was dandy, at least for for a while. then one day - it was on new year's eve 1997 - a drunk driver coming home from a party struck a patch of ice. the driver swerved off an embankment, sending the car crashing through my sister's living room wall. one of her ducks was found crushed under the front left wheel. the duck was rushed to the hospital, but it was critically injured and never recovered. the duck spent 4 years in a vegetative stage, racking up millions of dollars in medical bills before finally succumbing to an infection caused by an improperly cleaned feeding tube. all the trauma and the debt and shit really ate away at her. she was down a duck too, and even if she wanted a new one she couldn't afford it what with all the debt. and when she called up the duck people about her duck insurance the first thing they asked was did she put them in a row. the fuckers. i think maybe that made her feel like she was responsible for their death because she was the one who put them where she did, which also meant she felt she was responsible for every terrible thing that had suddenly befallen their little family. i tried to get her to see a psych or something but she just wouldnt go no matter how much i begged. then last october she just disappeared one day out of nowhere. when the police searched her house it was nearly empty. turns out she had sold most of her possessions in the preceding weeks. the only things she seems to have taken with her were her clothes and some toiletries. they found her driver's license completely melted in the firepit outback. practically the only significant thing that she left behind were her ducks. they were still arranged in same row that they had been in since before the accident. i wish i could have taken them in, but its impossible for someone to take another person's ducks. sure sometimes you can borrow them, if you've got permission that is. but taking them into your own home? it cant be done. it's been more than a year now since she left and we still haven't heard a peep from her. i just hope she decides to come back while ma and pa still have some time left. you can imagine how they took it.

anyway, to get back to what i was saying earlier, what could i do? i wasn't about to violate the warranty. i knew what might happen. maybe i coulda just left the last duck out of the row but that somehow seemed in violation of the spirit of the thing to me, and let me tell ya, you do not want to fuck with the spirt of the thing. so, i did not only what i had to do, but i also what felt right to me. that's the only way to really keep your hands clean. i took my ducks out of a row. by the end of it i damn near passed out on the floor. the ducks weren't too happy about being moved around so much, but hey, i wasnt too happy about it neither. i was too tired to feel empathy anyway. so afterwards i lay down in bed and im abou to fall asle- oh hey look, here comes the waiter. do you know what you're gonna order? oh yeah? that sounds real tasty, bud. huh? me? well i think i could go for a chicken dinner myself, ive been working up a pretty big appetite. by the way, did you see the tonights special? have a look at the sign! its duck a l'orange! you think they put em' in a row back there?!?!? HAAAAAAAAAAhaaaaaahaaaahahahaaaaaa

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my brother his wife is using him?

This may be long but I want to make sure there is enough info for you to give an accurate judgment. TLDR at the end but I encourage reading the full post

I (25f) have an older brother, J (28m). I also have a younger brother (22m), L. J and I were always close when we were younger then grew apart as we got older, the boys always were close. The year J graduated high school we became close again.

J met his gf A (29-31f, I dont even know how old she is but she's older then J) during college. I remember the first time A came home with him, and she was very sweet but very nervous. We clicked and had a good conversation that lasted hours (we all were at our parents house and us girls had to share a room and the boys did too). Anytime there were holidays we stayed at our parents and did this (big holidays that colleges had off like Christmas and Thanksgiving)

We met up a couple of times and all was fine. It was hard as they lived far away from where we grew up (2-4 hours depending on traffic and routes). Then I moved to the country, about 20 minutes away from them. We met up more often, but only maybe about once every 3 months. No big deal, I was busy working. Then J and A got engaged and it felt like everything changed.

I would invite them to hang out or get dinner, but J and A would make excuses. J would be like "A can't come so we won't make it" even when I said "okay but what if only you came? You're my brother?" He would make excuses. The days they agreed to meet up, suddenly day of couldn't go. He was tired after work, she wasn't feeling good, the car wasn't working. Anything and everything you could think of. I did notice whenever L came to visit me and stay, J and A would always be available to meet up, even if it was last minute.

So I figured...it somehow must be me? And then they got married. And it was beautiful.

Or so im told as it was a private ceremony and I wasn't invited :) I actually was originally told the date, which I asked off of work for, but then I got a text a week prior saying "guess what happened tonight" and then was told they got married. L was there. Our parents and myself were not. A did tell me she didn't feel right inviting our parents if her parents weren't there...but why not me? I was told it was a private ceremony and only L was there as a witness, but one of their friend's posted pictures and it had over 5 different people in them

I tried to let it go but honestly it hurt me and pissed me off and everything kept adding onto it. I have zero clue what the hell i did. I have texted J and asked him point blank if he is mad at me, he would deny. I asked for A's number cause he mentioned she was lonely and had lost friends, I said we could go get our nails done since that's something she likes (I dont but I figured I'd extend an olive branch) he refused to give it to me. It seems its me but again I have zero clue why.

It worsened after me and J got into an argument. They canceled again, and I do know A was having a bought of depression at this time. I understood, as someone diagnosed with depression and anxiety. But J told me I never would understand (A was still going out to places and hanging out with friends, meanwhile there were days I couldn't get out of bed and called into work sick. I know we shouldn't compare mental illness but it seemed like an excuse to me. A also would do things that she has said makes her mental health worse, like reading and watching things that triggers her). The whole reason I wanted to hang out is because I had Christmas gifts from our parents and a few of our childhood friends for them (L was out of the country at this time and had mailed a gift to them). They kept bailing and I tried for TWO MONTHS, I finally delivered the items the week after Valentines.

One of our friends was a baker and TOLD THEM she baked them a cake, special for them because A has dietary restrictions due to a chronic disease. They knew this and it spoiled. So I was upset for my friend, and I lied and said they got it to save her the hurt.

But when J finally told me to drop off the items I blew up at him. We stood outside his house and yelled at each other. He flat out told me to stop being so emotional and that I was letting hormones get in the way of thinking, and that I should understand A being depressed. I did! I yelled at him he should get his head out of his ass and that he is letting down not just me but our friends, especially the baker who has a waitlist and made stuff SPECIAL for them. He didn't thank me for my gift, but texted each individual person for theirs.

That was in 2022. A month after I apologized and he said he forgave me. But nothing has changed. Since then they didn't wish me happy birthday (they called L on his, he is now living with me temporarily, but when I pointed out I didn't get a happy birthday from anyone *literally only one friend wished me a happy birthday and L, even my own parents forgot* A told me I needed to get over myself and that birthdays weren't that important to them so I shouldn't take any offense. I didnt expect them to wish me a happy birthday this year because of that, but my true friends and my parents did remember this year),. They didn't come to my college graduation. I stopped texting J and I hadn't heard a response since. We did see each other this past Christmas coincidentally, not planned as they didn't come to our parents. J was pleasant, A said nothing but watched me the whole time, and I made excuses to leave this Christmas party as I didnt even know they knew the person throwing the party.

I came home early from work this past week and J was visiting L (something J claims he can't do during weekdays cause he works 9-5 during the week...allegedly). J gave me a hug and we all chatted for about an hour, it felt like old times, but then his wife called. It was a smooth conversation then I got brought up, and suddenly A needed J back home immediately. He bailed on dinner plans he and L had (L had spent all day cooking a roast, it was delicious btw and yes L was upset J didn't stay).

I had enough. I called J during his "work hours" on his cell. J answered and I chewed him out. I said our brother was hurt and whatever the issue with me is HAS to stop. If he doesn't tell me whats wrong, I CANT fix it. J told me there was nothing wrong with me and I was reading too into it. I pointed out some of the same instances I listed and he told me I was reading into it. He then accidentally let slip that A didn't want us talking. Which I figured. I blew up and told him A was using him. A was turning him against me and our parents *i am too lazy to go back but he stopped talking to our parents the same time he stopped talking to me but he always talked to L*. I mentioned how she is an adult and if she has an issue with me she needs to tell me, but instead she's a fucking coward. J yelled at me that she has anxiety and I yelled back "bitch I do too! I'm on fucking meds for it" which i know she isnt. J hung up on me.

Not only is everything above an issue, A also: doesn't have a job and only J has the income. Claims its because of her illness, the one that causes dietary restrictions, yet EATS said things even though she knows makes her sick. She won't let J meet up with our childhood friends. A also has stsrted getting J to take edibles with her. If J is tested, it will get him fired from his job. But then she complains he's being a loser if he doesn't do edibles with her.

The kicker is this: A solely used to date women. J is NOT a woman, nor does he want to identify as one. J knows A used to date women, and again tells me I should be more considerate seeing as how I am openly bisexual. However, and I havent told J this, one of the conversations I did have with A after they got married, she told me TO MY FACE "yeah, I never imagined marrying a guy yet here I am." Laughed and I kind of was like oh haha, isnt it crazy how things work out, to which she said "I dont even like men!" Slapped my thigh laughing and continued laughing. I was bewildered and when J had returned and asked what we were talking about we both changed the subject.

I did tell L when that happened and he thought it was weird but we couldn't change anything as they were married. I dont know if I should tell J.

But really I do feel as though A is using J, but now im wondering if I should lay it out more clearly WHY. Or if I should stay out of it. They already seem to hate me, so part of me is like why not go for it. But L is talking me off that bridge (my therapist is also testing me for something that isnt solely anxiety and depression) . I know J is hurt as he told L such, and part of me feels bad I yelled, but also the rest of me wants to key his fucking car and tell him to shove it up his ass and ban him from seeing L at my house as it is MY house even though L is living there

AITA?

TLDR: I yelled at my brother his wife is using him as she doesn't have a job, always falls back on her mental and physical illness yet does things to make them worse, and has also told me she doesn't like men (she used to exclusively date women prior to my brother).

What are these acronyms?

[winderlylandchime]

1/2 and we are now at 5x11 and he is so fucking happy because Brian said i love you and they are back together. He’s smiling so big its actually hilarious.

And the scene opens with Brian at church ‘what the fuck is going on? WHO FUCKING DIED?! DID THEY KILL MIKE? I mean he was an annoying little shit but that’s a bit much. WHY IS BRIAN IN A COFFIN?! WHAT THE FUCK WAS- oh thank fuck its a dream. A horrible one at that.’ ‘Has Brian not been home to shower, fucking hell, i feel so fucking bad for him. Ted is fully in survival mode huh?’ ‘Blondie is at the hospital! Wheres Brian! I need the happy couple back on the screen. Fucking hell Emy is scared now. Okay so Mike is alive and well, good. Now back to Brian and Justin’ And we are at the scene with Brian and Cynthia now ‘i fucking love these two. Look how he cares for everyone. He has a big fucking heart and it pisses me off that people pretend he doesn’t.’ And WE ARE AT THE FIRST PROPOSAL SCENE!!! *said with huge excitement and then it died down* ‘BRIAN AND JUSTIN AT HIS umm place…i love when they mock each other. Ahhh young LOVE. Country manor? Since when has that been a dream? I love seeing Brian around Justin when he works. I have no clue why but I do.’ Brian asks if he heard what he said to him last night ‘yes, i did Brian! Over the sound of my own tears but i heard it! *he paused it RIGHT BEFORE THE PROPOSAL AND I WANTED TO SCREAM* why the fuck is blondie being dismissive..bro that’s not what i wrote in the script inside my little brain *plays ep and Brian propose* um W- WHAT. *he moves forward while sitting as if he heard wrong and then pauses it when Brian talks about his dream* i hate *waves his cast to the tv and scoffs* but i also hate how everyone keeps doubting his change. Like bro let that man change. But also huh *plays ep* NOT WITHOUT HIM! So wait, hold the fuck up. Brian says he loves him. And they kiss. And he..*scoffs again* proposes. And then Blondie just says thanks and thats it? So THEYRE NOT TOGETHER?’ And we are with Ted and Brian at the club ‘i actually get why he doesn’t wanna reopen the club again. It is kinda weird in a way..i dont know. Oh Ted is not in a good shape. Whats going on with everyone’ We are now at the scene with Mel, Linds and Justin and mel says its good they realized what they had before its too late ‘PLEASE TELL ME THAT THIS MAKES BLONDIE RETHINK SOME STUFF…i still hate the..you know what? Im gonna be quiet and not judge. Just go back to Brian’ and we are at the scene with Jen and Brian ‘JEN AND BRIAN!! MY FAVORITE PEOPLE! FINALLY! (She says the judy line) i fucking love this woman! And look so does Brian! They shouldve had more scenes together, this wouldve been amazing (jen says he wants to sell the loft) WHAT?! Why? So not panic then why the fuck is he selling? What is happening? (Brian tells about the proposal) oh my god. HE TOLD HER? Holy fucking shit. *starts laughing cause jen offers pills* i love her but im sure he has some stronger shit in his drawer. OF COURSE SHES SORRY HES NOT HER SON IN LAW! This is the mother he shouldve had. Remember their first scene? I love them’ The scene with Brian and Ben happens ‘man fuck every single one of those protestors. Go to hell. BEAT HIS ASS BEN! I cannot believe that Brian is the collected and calm one. My boy is growing.’ ‘Ah fuck thats why Ted is acting this way. Poor fucking guy. But thats not your fault, man. Hate to say it Teddy but the dude is right, youre not god..that dude sucks’ Brian says he calls him Zen Ben ‘i call you boring. Once again Brian is better than me. It’s still fuck Mike tho *looks at me* what? i can say it now, he’s alive’ Mel and Linds talk about Canada ‘what the fuck is she on? Does she think that this type of shit won’t happen anywhere else?’ And we are at the second proposal now: ‘where the fuck are they going? I hate this car. (It shows the house and he is suspicious and brian says ‘we do’) WE? since when do we speak French? Fuck is he talking about we? THATS WHY HE SOLD THE LOFT?! Wait he bought this for Justin?’ *he pauses tv and stares at me and then just goes back to watching*

Country manor? Since when has that been a dream? RIGHT!?! What is up with Justin this fucking season? Since when does he want to live in the middle of nowhere and be married with children? SINCE WHEN? (And also Brian told him since Day 1 that was never going to happen)

I love seeing Brian around Justin when he works. I have no clue why but I do. YES (also this inspires me for my fic ;) )

Brian asks if he heard what he said to him last night ‘yes, i did Brian! Over the sound of my own tears but i heard it! THE I LOVE YOU HEARD ROUND THE WORLD

i hate *waves his cast to the tv and scoffs* but i also hate how everyone keeps doubting his change. <- Yes on both counts. Like everyone doubts his change so he reverts to what he’s always been and then everyone says “see, it wasn’t real.” But also WTF is this sudden focus on marriage? I hate it. It makes no sense. Leave Ben and Mikey to be the happy married boring couple and let Brian and Justin stay themselves.

This Brian and Jen scene is one of my all time favorites. The two of them have come so far. And Jen is the mother Brian deserves.

Okay… onto the proposal (worst idea ever, fuck you forever writers)

[lunarifie]

Rewatching Ninjago

(with no context other than the episode)

Sons of Garmadon episodes 1-2

Omg omg omg im so excited u have no idea, their new designs were like the beginning of a new age to me

I remember Harumi and MOST of the plot so im pumped to see all of this again

this is when the animation got GOOD, ik it only gets better but i think this was the turning point

LLOYD

Lloyd hit puberty 😶

i think everyone can agree this is when Lloyd truly became their favorite

It was so clever to make it look like the oni mask ninjas were the ACTUAL ninjas only to have Lloyd swoop in.

AAAA THE ANIMATION HIS GREEN MAGIC AJFISNFJD EVERYTHINGS SO COOL

AAAAND HE SAVED ONE OF THE ONI MASK GUYS THATS OUR BOY

Why does pixal sound so different 🤨

“MASTER LLOYD”

I forgot wu was gone :(

Lloyd (after getting his car): I could kiss you pix!

Pixal: I don’t think Zane would approve

Shes so funny

AND “PIX” THATS SUCH A CUTE PETNAME

wait omg i forgot Nya never learned who Samurai X 2.0 was omg thats still gonna be a plot point

This chase scenes so good

THEY HAVE EYE COLORS NOW, WELL AT LEAST LLOYD DOES

Why are the villains always in the sewers

Wait. Ik this scene. her highness, the queen, the girlboss.

I remember screaming at this scene when i was younger

GOD this scene was so fucking good

Nya: Thirsty..?

AAAAAAAA

My favorite part out of all of this was probably how the slave henchmen were like “Its nya! The master of water!” So fearfully instead of “its the girl ninja.” You can tell she really earned a title for herself and finally got some goddamn respect.

AGAIN. THE FUCKING ANIMATION.

COLE AND JAY COLE AND JAY COLE AND JAY COLE AND JAY

I love these idiots

Jay: Cole you’re my best friend but your also my worst enemy

Jay speaking facts fr

Cole: If someone went into the past who knows how our present would be altered! We could look completely different and not even know it!

Jay: But we dont! (Promptly takes off his mask, looking completely different)

With all due respect this is probably the funniest line in the episode

I missed these idiots sm

Cole: Wherever Wu is… Its been a year.

ITS BEEN A YEAR?!?!?!

Cole: Hello! Im Cole, master of earth, this is Jay, master of blabber.

Nvm this is the funniest

Why is Jay like, so abliest sometimes 💀

Jay (screaming): CAN YOU POINT US TO HIM???

Like dude just because they cant speak doesnt mean theyre deaf 😭

Jay: Wait! If Wu lost his memory, dont remind him of that stupid TV show i hosted, okay?

THEY REMEMBERED DJFNSKFNFJNSBTNS I LOVE THIS SM

Cole (after seeing it wasnt Wu): Im tired of losing people in my life

God damn hitting us hard huh.

Im gonna start making a Everytime-Cole-Shows-Signs-of-Abandonment-Issues bingo card

Jay: Wus wise, he’d find a way to alert us.

Wus a baby. A literal child.

Jay and Cole were so annoying that they had a MONK break his VOW OF SILENCE

Jay and Cole not only had Monks break their vow of silence, they had the monks ATTACK THEM.

ZANES EYES AAA ALL THEIR DESIGNS ARE SO AMAZING

AND KAIS!!!! KAI IS SO COOL.

Oh yeah. And the mechanic from that one prison. Still super pissed he tried to take apart Zane.

Zane (trying to impress Kai): Who likes ice cream? I DO! how was that for a one liner Kai?

Oppositeshipping growing on me

Kai (frozen like a popsicle): needs a little work….

THE GANGS ALL HERE 🥰

Nyas giggles are so cute

Jay: Soooo? Are we gonna talk about it?

Lloyd: What?

Cole: Your voice! Its-

Zane (deep autotune voice): Lower.

THATS WHAT IM SAYING

Its so much nicer to listen to too, no hate to the last voice actor

I just pictured Lloyds old voice in my head bc its so distinct and omfg its so different

Wait so Lloyds mom is GONE? She left him to search for Wu, just like that?

I can get why some ppl hate her now.

Love how Nya grew to be patient with Jay and his idiotcy

The oni masks are rlly cool

The royal family of ninjago never confused me until now. Are they just royal descendants? I dont think they rule ninjago

I love Zanes switch from robot him to human him

Im gonna ignore the whole romantic plot with Lloyd and Harumi since like, Garmadon Practically adopts her later 🫠

Love the ninjas banter, especially Nya and her hate for high chair figureheads and government officials.

Zanes also speaking facts tho, traditions just as important

Its so hard to imagine that Lloyds younger than the other ninja with how mature he acts, until you realize its more of him acting like an angsty begrudged teen while the Ninja are all in their weird 19 early-20s

I love Nyas armor

Her attitudes the best 😭

Miss “theyre just figureheads 🙄” Miss “TOO much gold if im being honest, not THAT impressive 😒”

JFNDJFNDJNE LLOYD HITTING NYA SO SHE BOWS

The way Harumi/Jade Princess insults the ninja but also compliments them is so funny to me

With how personal she understands them I should have known she was the Quiet One from the start

Jade Princess: I understand you Lloyd, my parents also died when i was little

Jay, who is adopted, struggling with the the concept of adoption: wait what? But your parents are right there? 🤨

Jay: Ever since master Wu went missing Coles been a real party pooper!

DAMN💀

Jay thats so mean everyone grieves in their own way

Zane: Party? Pooper?

Jay: ill explain later

Jay (autistic) teaching learned social cues to Zane (autistic) is probably my favorite HC

Kai: Secret passage way you say… is it, HERE! (Grabs a random book from a shelf)

Kai is such a little guy, so blorbolike, my little hometown boy

I love him.

Kai, stop grabbing and throwing books 😭

The way the counsel guy just stares at Kai as he trashes the book shelf 💀

The ninjas are just so bad at first impressions i love them

Jays lil ‘hiding behind anyone near him when hes slightly unnerved/scared’ is my favorite jay quirk, as well as the raptor hands he keeps in front of him

The fancy romance music for Harumi is so funny to me

Why did Lloyd think it was just OKAY to look in her room while shes preparing her makeup

Nya and Kai: (super serious keeping watch and suspecting the counsel)

Jay and Cole: (attacking the buffet)

Rlly shows their dynamics 😭

Omg princess harumi was kidnapped 😱

Lmaooo jk i remember this

Does Harumi become redeemable after??? Bc why does she help the poor? Is that like, an actual good trait or did she do it just this once to trick lloyd?

Okay but this Lloyd and harumi chase scene is so cool I remember truly believing she was kidnapped

UGHHH why did harumi have to be evil and ALSO his sorta-step-sibling they seemed to have sm potential at first

I still find her whole character so fascinating but I kinda miss what she could have been

Harumi: Patient little ones 🥰

The way she talks is so funny im so excited for her to be an absolute menace

Omfg she stopped Lloyd from fighting the sons of garmadon because she knew she’d have to interfere and they would potentially reveal her…

Just the knowledge that shes faking everything is crazy

SAMURAI X!!!!!!!! PIXAL!!!! ❤️

RUMI! AWWWWW thats such a cute cutename

Its hilarious how the ninja thought counsel man was a villain just bc he was a dick

I hate ninjago ACTUALLY making the whole ‘Lloyd crushing on harumi’ thing real only to show that Harumi practically becomes his adopted sister later on

Truly believe that Cole saying ‘you gotta break things to impress a woman’ perfectly shows he has no experience flirting with the opposite gender

Jay: You gotta make her laugh! Ask nya, she couldn’t resist my sense of humor!

Nya: (knocks jay on his ass) its an… acquired taste…

Harumi was really like, ‘okay, guess everyone thinks Lloyd and I have a thing going on, guess ill roll with it.’ And fully JUMPED HEADFIRST into the princess with a crush role. Like She doesnt even know Lloyds around and shes faking for her PARENTS

Oooooo Ultra Violet!!!!

I remember not really liking Kai as first but hes grown on me, kinda like Lloyd

COLE FLASHBACK COLE FLASHBACK

that transition was so clean tho

I love how they use Coles old design to animate the past

OMG THIS IS WHEN WE GET INFO ON COLES DEAD MOM

Coles rlly in it if hes traumadumping to a random old man on a mountain 💀

Cole: My dads always out singing and dancing… He leaves all the responsibilites and chores for me!

Damn. thats actually so sad. he had to grow up so quick. No wonder he was the leader before Lloyd.

I love Coles subtle character development and how the fandom interprets him. At first he was an uptight serious leader who needed to be the solid rock in the formation. Now he’s more relaxed, obviously due to the friends he surrounds himself with. The fandom sees that and exaggerates him as a relaxed big bear kinda guy and i love that for him.

Im literally so mad i cant screenshot netflix, Cole in the sunset was so pretty i wouldve loved to draw him

Ooooo Counsel Hutchins has a secret passageway…. To where?

I love how ninjago will hint at serious themes like gun violence by the sound of gunshots and calling bombs ‘blastzaps’ 💀

Omfg did the palace EXPLODE?!?!?!?

Ultra Violet: (choking Kai with her thighs)

Kai (suffocating): I- I didnt even get your name—

NFJDNNFKDNSBFNSNF

HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THIS ADULT JOKE LAST TIME 😭😭😭😭😭

(Counsel getting interrogated and held down by Lloyd and a sphere comes for BOTH of them)

Lloyd: You saved me…

Lloyd can be such a dumb blonde sometimes

I CANT BELIEVE HARUMI WAS FAKING COUGHING IN THE FIRE TOO LIKE WHAT YOUUUU BLEW THE PALACE UP

Holy shit Zanes spinjitzu is so cool

Wait wait wait

Why would Harumi even MENTION the mask if she wanted to retrieve it??? Did the writers wanna throw the scent off of her THAT bad

Holy shit the mask is cool as fuck

Jay: Really? Four arms? Like thats new.

HBFKSNGJD

I love imagining the voice actors going ‘WACHA’ and other ninja noises

I feel like I haven’t stressed enough about how much I love their elemental powers now

Counsel hitchins: That mask of deception was a fake…

Harumi: A FAKE- i mean, a fake 🥺

Counsel: Im sorry, i couldnt trust the ninja just yet.

the irony is incredible

Counsel hitchins is actually such a great guy, bless him

Wait do the royal family die. Istg if they die im gonna be so sad

LLOYD LIFTED A MOTORCYCLE LIKE IT WAS NOTHING

Lloyds so cool

You KNOW the sons of garmadon are laughing at Lloyd saving Harumi

I love Violets screeches

STOP. THAT WAS SO SMART OF LLOYD

The definition of think smarter not harder

God Lloyds been through it fr

And for what??? What has he done??? Literally valueing Harumis life over the mask only to have her betray him

Give my boy a break

WAIT WAIT WAIT

ITS THE DESTINYS BOUNTY!!!!!!

Its looks so rusty and old tho? How long has it been since they used it?

Istfg the rest of these seasons the villains have to leave the bounty alone, its like the ninjas only consistent home, please just let it be 😭😭😭

Harumi: What about the emperor and empress? Hutchins? Are they…

Nya: Im sorry princess, they didnt make it…

So. The royal families just DEAD? They really reeled us in with the whole ‘theyre the only ones left of their bloodline’ AND THEN JUST KILLED THEM. HARUMIS ADOPTED. SHES NOT EVEN ROYAL BLOOD. THEYRE JUST DEAD.

Theres like a twisted sorta feeling watching this and KNOWING everything went as harumi wanted. This was her plan to the T.

[despite-everything]

im

just going to write this out because i need to get it out somewhere and dont know where my little audio recorder is. i know its hard to live with parents for a lot of people, and i knew it'd be hard for me but thats really hitting right now.

today wasnt the worst, but it also kinda sucked. some geriatric asshole stopped his working vehicle in the middle of the street for no reason, and nearly got me t-boned because of it, then i got an energy bill for a place i dont live despite cancelling the policy in july, then i got a message from my insurance agent saying my policy would be cancelled if i didnt pay (but nothing was due?) and then when i tried to call i learned that this house often doesnt have cell signal in the afternoon. i eventually managed to talk to the insurance people and got that sorted, but i couldnt get through to the energy people, so that's still unresolved. im still rattled from the car thing - i was almost killed in a car last year, so im very sensitive around crashes and near-crashes (no flashbacks today, though, so thats better than the last near-incident i dealt with). tomorrow my dad and i fly out to visit his aging parents - his dad is basically wasting away and his mom is losing her mind, so its a bit of a lets-visit-one-last-time thing. i havent seen them since 2018 and rarely talk to them, but i know theyve fallen down this horrible fox-news-christian-conservative hole lately, and before that they werent great, so i have a horrible feeling this trip is just going to be painful and sad. i know that best-case-scenario, we talk about nothing meaningful at all, and they dont comment on my appearance. but they're going to hate it. and if they actually knew me, they'd hate me, too. and i feel bad leaving my cat behind to live in the basement for 3 days - my stepmom will look after her, but she's going to be very lonely. so there's that, too.

but honestly i needed to write this out because my dad and i were driving our dog to the park to let her run around and we were listening to the radio. he asked me why i dont always use my radio voice, and i told him its because it takes extra effort to stay low and smooth for the persona and the microphones, and that after a few hours its tiring. he said he knew that, but then basically asked again - i tried to get him to clarify, but he didnt have the vocabulary to explain it, so he tried to mimic my voice (i guess?) and it was fucking mean. like i felt my heart drop and almost teared up immediately. i said something like "haha i don't sound like that" and he doubled down and said i did. and the thing is like... i know my natural voice is a bit nasal. im from texas and was raised with a mother and an aunt with nasally, high-pitched southern accents, and i inherited some of that. i HATE my natural voice. for years, any video taken where i spoke at all, i hated rewatching it. i thought i sounded annoying and could barely fathom people wanting to be around me. i hear any recording of my self earlier than 2021 and i want to turn it off and erase it completely. i don't think i'll ever get over that hatred. but as i've gotten older, my voice has dropped a bit. and i make a conscious effort to have much less of a texan accent (some words still trip me up - aisle, line, fire, wild... "i" is hard to not sound texan on), and i try to sound "smoother" and more pleasant. but i know i don't always succeed, especially if im excited. and the thing is, my excitement is always too much for my family. it's annoying and immature and overwhelming, apparently. so my entire life i've tried to tone myself down, but sometimes i fail, and sometimes i'm so wound up and anxious i fail then, too. and i know it's annoying, but jesus christ that imitation hurt.

when i tried to express that, my dad got pissed and was like "thats just what you sound like" and i said something along the lines of "you don't have to mean about it" and he got more upset and was like "im not being mean you just sound like that. but fine. i just wont bring it up ever again" and im sitting in the passenger seat thinking... what am i supposed to do? what am i supposed to say? if i cry, he'll get even more upset and think im overreacting and being immature, but todays already been hard (to self-regulate earlier, i bit my arm so hard i accidentally drew blood, and screamed so loud in my car my hearing was temporarily dampened, but while that helped, it didn't fix anything), and i could cry any moment. and my mind just loops back to the impression of me, which was startlingly similar to his "whiny voice" he uses to mock assholes. it just felt fucking awful and yet i felt kinda crazy because he keeps saying he didnt mean it in a bad way, and he isnt the type to play mind games but my mother did that sort of thing all the time, and i was tired and upset and wanted to go back home. after the park, i tried to continue the conversation, but never really understood what part of my voice or cadence he was referring to,but i think i smoothed things over enough. but it just sucks so much.

im living with him and my stepmom right now as i look for a job, and im more than an hour away from any of my friends. while i could drive to see them, it doesnt make sense to waste that gas when im unemployed and heading for the airport in the morning tomorrow. and i dont really call my friends. i could, but its not a thing we do, and i honestly would just want to say what this post said and then move on. i just wish i had company. but im outside trying not to be eaten alive by mosquitoes but theyre getting me through me jeans, so i just have to suck it up and go inside to wash the dishes.

[lemon-sugarcoats-nothing]

🐝vent

My night was awful. It started out Okay; i was at my grandma's apartment to see my dad and we played some games. Came home to mom's car not being in it's spot. My brothers and I assume she went to go run an errand, so we go inside, find her boyfriend, and unwind from being out all day. I was dealing with friend drama at that point too.

Half an hour later my mom calls me and tells me what to make for dinner, because she's out at a local "Social club" (Bar, but members only) with a friend. I think, "Great, maybe she wont drink though. She's been going sometimes and only having one".

7:30 passes. At 8 my brother asks me when we should make dinner, neither of us are hungry so we postpone.

8:30 passes, we make dinner because it's getting late. While we're making the food, friend drama dies off and they start joking around in the gc -all good and at that point i was ready to have a relaxing end of the evening.

9:30 passes. My friend moves a virtual birthday party for an acquaintance up half an hour (10) so i get started doing dishes. While im getting ready to do them, i start hearing noises and voices in the "back room" (small room at the back of the house that has the back back door, connected to the kitchen through another door) but no one's coming in. I cant tell if they're crying, laughing or just talking, but someone kept leaning on the door. I waited.

9:45 my mom opens the door and stumbles in; i immediately notice she. is. drunk. Her face is flushed, she was having trouble walking in the door, and she was slurring her words. I dont remember what the first thing she said was, but shortly after her friend also walks in. Her friend was tall (pretty) and significantly less drunk, i dont even know if she was tipsy. But it was a bit of a relief she was here too. My mom went upstairs -struggling- her friend followed a minute after. They came back down after my mom gave her a tour of the house, and then they went to the backroom to talk.

So far, so good right?

I was still uncomfortable so i finish dishes and other night-time responsibilities (Feeding the rabbits and refilling their water), then take my computer and phone to my room to camp out till morning (and for the birthday call).

Sometime during beginning of the call (10:15ish?) i start to hear arguing downstairs. Now, my room is above the kitchen, i have a "back room" to my room and i can usually hear when people are arguing in that room, from p much anywhere in my room. Sound carries. I couldnt make out everything they were saying, but it was b a d , and at one point my mom came inside the house shouting, and up the stairs shouting, and slammed doors so hard it shook the walls of my room, "[friend's name] Fuck you, [boyfriend's name] Fuck you. FUCK ALL OF YOU". My friends on call all heard it.

So im trying not to have a panic attack while getting a link for everyone to watch the movie Birthday boy picked out, and while we watch the movie the argument is still going but downstairs or in mom's room i dont remember. I had one earmuff off on my headphones so i can listen if she starts coming to my room for an argument, i pulled up an audio recording app just in case, because at this point I'm scared of a repeat of 21st of last month.

At some point it dies down, my mom left briefly, came back and was still pissed off but not slamming doors, just muttering things i didnt make out. She never came to my room because i wasnt supposed to have my computer in my room past 11 (it died at 11:20 anyway, in the middle of the movie, sad) nor am i supposed to have my phone there ever (she never notices, im about to be 18 anyway, my mom stopped caring with my older brother when he turned 18).

I stayed in my room the whole night, door closed. I dont close my door unless im doing....things, or unless im scared of what's on the outside of my room. But this causes problems in the summer and winter because my room isnt temperature controlled; the backroom to my room is unfinished, theres a crack in the side wall and a big gap in the door going to it. Heating doesnt go to my room, so closing the door = closing out all the nice warm air. I was cold.

I also was supposed to clean the bathroom last night. I was going to do it after dishes and before going to the virtual party, but my brother got shouted at for opening the back room door while my mom was in it (He was trying to take out the trash), and i didnt want to have to deal with her drunk ass while asking if anyone needed to use the restroom before it gets taken over for 30 mins to get cleaned.

So yeah i had a bad night. Im exhausted, i was exhausted before the shit with my mom happened, Im exhausted after having a small panic attack, Im exhausted from trying to figure out what room my mom was in, I'm exhausted from holding my pee all night because i was scared i'd run into her, Im fucking. exhausted.

[arollofthedie]

Im pissed off, Im upset, Im concerned. I literally hate everything this job has done to me in such a short period of time. Im pissed that Im here to do the job Im paid for and go home. Ive been nothing but friendly to everyone Ive worked with so far and all youre gonna do is be a passive agressive bitch and lie about me to supervisors. Im upset because I feel like Im giving up on something Ive worked so hard for but I know its for the best. Ive been at rock bottom before and Ive worked too hard to stay in a place that will drive me right back down and I sure as hell havent put this much work into myself as a person to adopt terrible personality traits just to fit in at work. Im concerned because I need the money. Im working towards certain goals and I need the money, I know I can make it work but something that always gives me anxiety is financials. I know itll work out, Ive /made/ it work out before and I have plenty of support but the nerves are still there. I just cant stand periods of uncertainty especially when the cause of them is having to leave a job because of the awful work environment. Cant even really feel better because crying always makes me mentally and emotionally exhausted for the rest of the day. It always sucks when its an accidental breakdown too. I didnt mean to start crying in the car, just glad I wasnt the one driving, but also means it was a witnessed breakdown 😒

But theres only so much a person can take you know? 2 months of being talked down to and treated poorly while being talked about very passive agressively, only to be bounced between different people who I dont mesh with and to be talked about behind my back untruthfully. Its not worth it mentally, and its not worth breaking myself down physically for a job that will inevitably throw me aside for another worker. They wonder why the turnover rate is so high when thats the environment thats cultivated. Anyone who knows their worth would leave the second theyre able to as well.