and it’s such a pity because before the movie gets into slasher territory it gives you this incredibly poignant promising story about youth, aging, sexuality and the porn industry in the 70’s but god forbid we create heartfelt stories
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i had turned off automatic updates in google play years ago. i wake up this morning and the tumblr icon is different. i open it and lo and behold it has updated tumblr. i check google play and it has for some reason updated all my apps and turned on auto-updates. wtf.
like idek how long it's been since tumblr updated for me, but i have read users complaining about some new update or other that didn't affect me probably 1 billion times, and now bam! all hitting me at once. the app is soooooo ugly now :(
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oh my god i figured it out
okay so it took an accident of me not checking on it, but I FINALLY figured out why I wasn't getting enough loft on my bread:
I was NOT giving enough time for yeast/bacteria production.
So if I do my other bread recipe's 4 hour levain development, then follow the pullman's recipe and do about an hour and a half initial rise (with stretch and folds) with a one hour final rest and rise, I get something like this:
okay that rose in the oven but like. not a whole lot, yknow?
tried again, a little longer on the levain, but this time I tried to do the final rest/rise in the fridge overnight like when you have an overnight ferment on a classic sourdough
oh that's a lot better! but the recipe is for a PULLMAN'S loaf, it should be square as possible, am I using enough ingredients?
NO I WAS. I JUST WASNT GIVING ALL THE TIMES ENOUGH TIME
this time I let the levain (40-50g starter, 35g whole wheat flour, 35g AP flour, 70 mL water) develop for like six and a half hours in a proofer or a slightly warmed oven.
pour levain into a stand mixer if you've got one, bowl if you dont. Mix in sugar (35g) and warm water (400mL). Let that sit for the usual half hour in proofer.
add flour (600ish grams total, i often do about a third whole wheat to two thirds AP), 5g salt, 80-90g fat of choice (butter, margarine, etc). I put it in the stand mixer for around 10 minutes on low. (this is a REALLY old stand mixer so it CAN go real slow- do 7-8 min on lowest setting on a modern mixer, 15 min if you wanna do a hand knead)
cover and put in proofer. As usual I did 4 stretch and folds at half hour intervals, but on the final interval I forgot about the timer- it was left in the bowl for around a full hour after the last fold rather than the planned half hour.
by the time I checked on it, it rose WAY more than i was expecting it to. Decided to roll with it (lol), greased the pullman's pan (butter if no one's allergic, margarine otherwise), flattened, rolled up the dough, plopped it in and slid on the lid.
Did the final rest for two full hours in proofing temps, then baked at 350-60ish for a half hour with the lid slid on, 15 min with the lid off.
so, all in all: the ideal loaf of pullman's sourdough starts when you wake up and comes out around dark lunch.
not practical but hey! an interesting study to be sure
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I kind of sort of maybe want to write a fic about some entity offering Edwin a chance to go back to his past and not be sacrificed as a reward of sorts.
And he is shown how he would finish school and grow up, find a job, maybe a wife he never quite loves, maybe children he does love, and he grows old and he dies, and he goes into the blue light and it's heaven.
And Charles is standing next to him, and even if it only takes a minute - time works differently for visions - it feels like eternity, because he knows he cannot ask Edwin to stay. he knows hell, he has seen it, Edwin spent 70 years there, so how could Charles ever ask him to not give himself a chance to heal from that, once and for all? He can't ask for that, and even hoping for Edwin to say no feels horrible, because that is his best friend, his most important person, right there and shouldn’t Charles wish for Edwin to be free of this, even at the cost of his own happiness?
The vision ends, and Edwin’s eyes refocus and Charles looks at him and thinks, I love you the most, and I know you’ll forget me but I’ll never forget you, and thank you for letting me spend this time with you, even if it wasn’t forever.
„Go on, then“, he tells Edwin, because he cannot say goodbye instead.
But Edwin doesn’t even look at him, just takes his hand (and that feels like a goodbye as well), squares his shoulders and tells the entity, „Thank you very much, but I’m not interested.“
And Charles isn’t even sure if he hears it, because Edwin cannot reject that offer, no one with half a mind would, and Charles knows Edwin’s mind inside out.
The entity just smiles, looks over at Charles, and asks, „Because of him?“
And Edwin nods, like it shouldn’t even need an explanation; for a moment he looks over at Charles and there is a love in his eyes that is so vast and so overwhelming and so eternal that Charles wouldn’t be able to recognise it, if he didn’t carry its twin in his chest.
And Edwin says, „Of course. Every bit of it was worth it, because of him.“
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