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masterweaverx · 4 years ago

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RWBY Parents from Best to Worst

That’s right, everybody, I’m a-going to rank how terrible these people are to and for their kids! For the sake of covering as many parents as I can, I am defining ‘parent’ as either ‘legal guardian’ or ‘the one that gave birth to you’, and excluding relationships that are explicitly something else. That does mean that we’re going to miss out on some very important people, though, so before we begin, let’s have some Honorable Mentions!

Yang Xiao Long and Winter Schnee: Professional Momsisters

“That’s why big sisters come first, to protect the ones that come after.” I don’t know who said that to these two, if anybody actually did, but it’s a quote that most definitely applies to them. Not only would they take a bullet (or a sword, or a fireball) for their younger siblings, they took the time out to give them affection and training that they needed when their own parents weren’t quite doing the job. If I absolutely had to rank one of them as the better momsister, I’d say Yang, but that’s really only because Yang had less to deal with overall; a depressed single dad not being able to pull himself together just doesn’t stack up with an abusive powermonger, a self-loathing drunkard, and all the institutional bigotry and pressure of Atlas. Plus, you know, Winter went into the military for a bit. Still, pretty good track record considering!

Klein Sieben: Doing the work of seven good dads

Look, there is only one reason Klein wasn’t listed before the momsisters, and that reason is that he is technically the hired help (and could therefore become the fired help). He is, hands down, a better surrogate parent than Yang and Winter, providing guidance and care to all the Schneeblings and very effectively undoing the damage Jacques Gele (HE DOES NOT GET TO BE CALLED SCHNEE!) did to them. And he even helped out Willow! If he was allowed to do more, he would absolutely be My Real Dad of the year.

Qrow Branwen: “The only one that gets to be sad in this house is me!”

Qrow has a lot of flaws. Like, so so many flaws. As Yang said in a noncanon spinoff, he’s cool but not exactly a role model. Thing is, you don’t have to be a role model to be a good parent--you just have to make sure your kids (or nieces in this case) get good advice and the opportunity to grow into the best versions of themselves they can be. And when Qrow’s not beating himself up or drowning his sorrows, he’s actually very good at helping Yang and Ruby. Honestly the only reason he’s not on the actual list is because he’s technically not a parent.

Uncle Copper: Adopting a blind kid automatically makes you cool

So here we have a character that appeared in a single flashback in the novels, but from what we do know he was pretty likely to be a good guy. Like, raising a blind kid is hard enough; raising a blind kid in a desert after their actual parents got nommed by sand is so, so much more difficult. And yet, this guy said ‘If nobody else is going to adopt this kid I will!’ and by all measures he was a very caring and loving guy. Also, shout-out to the tribe, who took Fox in after Copper got killed by some maniac (and also killed said maniac). Fox has had a rough life, but it’s been filled with supportive people. Not everyone can say that.

Starr Sanzang: She put up with Sun

Sure, she’s only had one scene in one novel, but Starr showed patience and caring and... probably did a lot to make sure Sun stays as aggressively cheery and patient as he is. Plus she’s got a dojo in Vacuo now... okay, I’ll be honest, I don’t know nearly enough about her to really assess her. Still, as far as cousins go, Sun Wukong could do a lot worse. And there are the implications of their motifs to factor in...

Rhodes: If you’d done even just a little bit more--!

So, reasonably, what would you do when you see a little girl enslaved with a shock collar? Would you (A) get the girl out of there, (B) arrest the woman doing it, (C) try to get the girl therapy, or (D) all of the above? If you picked (E) secretly train the girl in swordplay so she can join a huntsman academy when she comes of age, then congratulations! You’ve given her hope! Good for you! And what if she snaps after five years of literal torture, kills her abuser, and then turns to you for comfort and/or approval? Welp, obviously she’s an irredeemable criminal and you have to bring her in, crushing all the faith she had in you and herself.

Seriously Rhodes, dropped the ball hard on that one. I’m only mentioning you because you had such a serious impact on Cinder’s development.

Brother Gods: Creating and destroying entire species

Like, okay. Look. These are the two that made humanity, so an argument could be made that they’re humanity’s parents. But, by the strict and arbitrary rules I have selected, they aren’t parents. And even if they were, they would be just the worst sort of parents possible. Darkbro is bad enough, what with viewing only strength as valuable and creating the Grimm and, you know, annihilating humanity that one time, but he’s at least honest and honorable. Not like the cryptic Lightbro, who doesn’t bother making sure people understand him, who doesn’t even keep his own promises to his brother... I get that they’re basically overpowered children. Yeah, they are. Still... kinda terrible.

So, now that that’s all done, let’s get to the actual list! After the break, so you don’t get stuck scrolling a lot. RWBY parents, from best to worst, are as follows:

23. Saphron and Terra Cotta-Arc: Two moms are better than none!

If I’m rating all the parents, and I am, then I have to acknowledge their flaws. And... these two don’t have any! Okay, fine, they used Adrian in a criminal scheme that one time (and that was literally just asking him to cry on command) and maybe Terra’s overworked and, to be fair, parenting a young kid is a lot different than parenting a teenager. But not only did they support their kid, they helped out all the kids that needed to room with them for a while! Saphron may also qualify as a momsister, depending on how well the Arcs managed their massive-numbered horde of kids. Look, the point is: Excellent parents. Bam.

22. Yatsuhashi's Parents: Their slipups weren’t their fault

When your kid can wipe your memories and you don’t know about it, you’re bound to get a few mistakes down the line. Luckily for everyone, after the whole incident with Hiyoko Yatsu came clean, and his parents made absolutely sure that he understood (A) that having such an ability was a big responsibility and (B) that even though he really screwed up he was NOT evil. Given the man that Yatsuhashi is now, I’m pretty confident in calling them great parents--even if they only appeared in a book flashback.

21. Coco's Dad: He exists!

That’s... honestly all I really know about him. He’s mentioned once in the books, and Coco has a few brothers. I’m kind of just assuming he’s a good parent from that, even if he didn’t figure out how to help Coco with her claustrophobia. So... yeah, shrug, Coco’s got a dad.

20: Ghira and Kali Belladonna: Actually marvelous people

Loving. Caring. Mentoring, protective. You may be asking why these two aren’t lower on the list, given that they are absolutely great for Blake, and I’ll have to admit that they only really made one slipup--letting Adam talk with Blake.

And okay, look. The thing about people like Adam is that they don’t start out showing their true colors. It’s always a slow, gentle broil. Blake was young and stupid, Adam was cute and edgy, and these parents want their daughter to be happy. So not twigging on what Adam really was--or at least not being able to properly convince Blake--that’s entirely understandable. And they did instill her with a strong enough moral code to leave when enough was enough, and they absolutely welcomed her back with open arms. Frankly, if the lower-listing parents didn’t exist, I would happily say they are the best parents in the show.

19. Pietro Polendina: He took Penny’s death flags

When you carve out part of your literal soul to bring your girl back from the dead, you get MAJOR parenting props. And even beyond that, Pietro is an absolutely caring and supportive father to everyone’s favorite bundle of sunshine. Even when she’s put in the rough position she was in, Pietro did his best to help her out. His one big flaw, though, is being overprotective and a bit presumptive. He does want Penny to live her best life, but he also can be just a touch too quick to say he knows what’s best for her. To his credit, when he’s called out on it, he does mend his ways. And he’s at least better then the GENERAL...

18. Salem and Ozma: Good parents, surprisingly!

Sure, Salem decided that world conquest was a good idea and wanted to put down anybody that wasn’t directly from her bloodline. Sure, she psychologically manipulated her husband when he had doubts. And, being fair, it’s highly likely that her four daughters were killed in the crossfire of her and Ozma’s little tuff. But! That was likely an accident, she’s been shown to still clearly mourn their passing, and before that point she absolutely loved and adored the girls. Ozma gets points for being a generally good person who fell in love with her before she became unstable and, honestly, was just trying to help his girls escape... and hey, he blames himself for their deaths. As does Salem.

Just because they’re kind of directly responsible for a LOT of Remnant’s woes doesn’t mean they aren’t good parents!

17. Will and Meg Scarlatina: Estranged but loving...

Yes, I know Rooster Teeth hasn’t officially confirmed that Bill is Will. I still believe though! Also it makes for a great picture, in any case.

Look, you can be the best and most loving parents ever--and from what we saw in the novels Will was definitely loving--but if you split up, your kid is going to get a little stressed. And hey, it’s not like these two were terrible people! Velvet’s just got a lot going on because of things entirely out of her control. Parents are people too, but sometimes the stress of one situation will leak out into another. Just... give people time to adapt.

16. Nicholas Schnee: The man, the legend, the titan!

Nicholas Schnee is the rockstar success story of Remnant. Some guy from Mantle put in all the work to make the SDC, and honestly from what little we know about him he was probably a great guy! But if we’re registering parental goodness, well... he wasn’t quite smart enough to warn Willow away from abusive gold diggers, and he’s not present when the story starts. So, yeah, even if he was a good parent otherwise--and I think he would be--he kinda... didn’t put in the work to prevent Willow breaking later. Still. Not deliberately terrible!

15. Li and An Ren: Don’t die in front of your kids, folks!

Seriously, it traumatizes them, especially if there’s a Grimm assault going on at the same time. Oh, double-especially if you reassure them that everything will be fine literally the second before the roof collapses on your head. And... well, okay, you couldn’t help your son and some random girl being the only survivors...

In all seriousness, that whole situation was absolutely out of their control. And before their deaths they were shown to be loving, wise, giving good advice to Lie Ren and helping him understand what the right thing to do was. Honestly, if they hadn’t died in front of him he’d be a lot better, mentally speaking. His trauma is not their fault. Plus Li went out distracting the big Grimm so Lie could run. No greater love hath man, indeed.

14. Summer Rose: Loving mother, ticking trauma bomb

When she was around, Summer Rose was probably the best mom Yang and Ruby could ask for. Sure, everyone could be exaggerating a little on how great a person she was--fond memories and grief can do that--but even taking that into account, she was probably a great and wonderful woman to be raised by. And hey, it turns out the reason she vanished was to go confront basically the Devil Herself so her kids wouldn’t have to live in a world where she existed! I can totally get the logic behind that.

And to be fair, “I’m going to do this on my own so nobody else suffers” is a pretty common character flaw among the RWBY cast. There are entire arcs where each character learns to overcome it. Still, wandering off on your lonesome without telling anyone was not the smartest move, Summer. Especially if you expected to die--which, you know, Devil Herself, high probability. And you know, if you had died, that would be bad enough, but now Ruby’s practically certain to have to fight your grimmified self. At least she figured out what happened to you before Salem decided to hammer in the trauma button, so she’ll be a little more ready, but... seriously.

13. The Arc Parents: Look, you try juggling eight kids!

To be fair, neither Arc parent has appeared on screen, but we can derive some of their traits from their kids. Jaune’s father said women like confident men. Jaune’s mother said strangers are friends you haven’t met yet. Jaune’s sister moved out of the house and (it’s implied) was happier for it. Jaune himself took his family’s ancestral weapon and ran off to Beacon to become a hero without any training whatsoever....

I get the impression that these two are not horrible parents, but they aren’t really stellar ones either. They slip up, don’t understand their children, give some really bad advice (as well as really good advice), and... look, it’s kind of middle of the road here. The Arcs could be wonderful people that just weren’t ready for the complexities of raising eight kids. I come from a big family myself, I know it can be stressful. And their kids turned out well anyway, so...

12. The Mother of Pyrrha Nikos: You taught your girl too well

Hero complexes are funny things. And Pyrrha Nikos... in retrospect, she was really hiding a lot of insecurities under that facade. Laying it all at this woman’s feet is unfair, I’ll admit, a lot of that came from being The Mistral Champion. But... with stories and fairy tales of heroes, it’s not hard to imagine a genuinely loving mother making sure her daughter knew right from wrong, always knew to act with mercy and protect the weak, and made her hardline into being a hero at the cost of her own... sense of self. It wouldn’t even be something either of them noticed, really. Good people can make bad choices sometimes.

11: Ilia's Parents: Oh god, can good people make bad choices...

So the idea of getting Ilia up to Atlas for a better life, that rocks (if you assume the propaganda to be true). And I’m certain her parents absolutely did what they did out of love. But what they did, you see, was tell Ilia to hide a very important part of herself from anybody who could find out, since it was likely she would be kicked out of the school she was in if people found out she was a faunus.

Which actually, did a lot of damage.

I mean look at Ilia now! She has trouble expressing herself until she explodes, she follows a crowd instead of her own morals, she broke down in tears when she finally did the right thing... Conceal Don’t Feel is never good advice, and these two went on and said ‘Honey, because of racism, you have to hide the fact you literally change color when you have emotions.’ Oh, and then they died offscreen--again, not their fault, but boy howdy did it give Ilia a complex.

10. Taiyang Xiao Long: Slumped at just the wrong time

Honestly, Tai as he is now is a wonderful dad. Supportive of his daughters in their time of need, able to lift their mood with a tasteless joke or two, frankly if we were assessing just how they were in the moment... I’d still be a little critical of his refusal to talk about the girls’ mothers, but hey, that’s minor. Compared to, you know...

Okay, so this needs serious addressing. Taiyang cannot be blamed for falling into a depressive slump. People can hurt, and need time to heal. That said, his depressive slump is at the root of Yang’s many issues, and frankly if she hadn’t had to pull herself together for Ruby she would be a major mess. It’s a bad situation all round, even if it’s not his fault.

9. Willow Schnee: “Kids, don’t wind up like me.”

Drowning her sorrows isn’t the best way to handle being stuck in an abusive marriage, but it was the best way Willow could think of. And, yeah, that really cut into her skills as a mom... but despite that, she did her darnedest to make sure her kids had what they needed to free themselves. Heck, once Jacques was out of the picture, she even pulled herself together and risked her life to save them! A broken women, to be sure, but not a shattered one.

8. Neptune's Mother: She exists!

Being fair, there’s not a lot to go on here. We know Neptune’s mother is a lawyer (insert evil lawyer joke), that their family are famous swimmers, and that his brother caused his hydrophobia by tossing him into the water. It does paint a bit of a picture, though, of everyone having expectations for Neptune that he was not able to live up to. Pretty poor parenting, if it’s true.

7. Nora Valkyrie's Mom: Come get your girl!

Literally the only factoid we have about Mama Valkyrie is that she abandoned her to the Grimm. We don’t know when this was, and it’s feasible it’s a case of ‘Oh No I Lost Track Of My Daughter In The Panic!’ But given we see young Nora scavenging for scraps of food... I’m not optimistic on her parenting skills.

6. Raven Branwen: "I wasn’t part of your life, how could I ruin it?”

Raven is just not a good mom at all. And, surprisingly, she seems to know it. Or that’s one interpretation of her character. The thing about Raven is that she plays her cards close to chest. We still don’t know why she left her daughter, and we only have inklings about the reasoning behind her behavior once they reunited. In the end, though... she did concede to Yang, she did apologize for something, and there’s a very deliberate indication that a lot of her behavior is a mask to both others and herself. So, terrible mother, for the moment, but self-aware.

5. Salem's Father: Explicitly noted as cruel

We get a bit more about Salem’s father from ‘Fairy Tales Of Remnant’, how he became possessive of the last remnant of his wife and locked her away in a tower. From what we know of him, that’s all he did--lock her away and not let her go. Still makes him a terrible dad. And with this, we transition firmly into the most definitively abusive parent figures. Everyone before this might have the excuse of not realizing what was going on or having their own damage, but now we’ve got parents actively deciding to make their kids’ lives worse.

4. Jacques Gelé: HE DOES NOT GET TO BE CALLED SCHNEE!

His children are property, to be manipulated and traded for the benefit of the company he married into, and any defiance is to be quelled instantly. He is manipulative, scheming, abusive, and frankly the worst sort of scumbag to ever wear a white suit. He does have the single redeeming quality of only leaning into the punishment if it benefits him; nobody would ever accuse the man of being needlessly cruel. His name is Jacques, and you will hate him... especially on the rare occasions he actually has a point.

3. The Marigolds: There’s no peppy tagline, they’re just mean

There’s not a picture of these jerks on the wiki, so you’ll have to make do with the woman that is no longer their daughter. See all that empty space around her? That’s about as close as they ever got. May spells out how much they hated her for having a heart, and how little they cared about her as a person, in one epic line. And even if they have other redeeming qualities (unlikely) we can tell they’d probably still be terrible parents because of how sleazy May’s cousin is. Honestly, for once I’m glad some characters don’t get pictures. They don’t deserve to be remembered. They aren’t even the cool kind of evil, they’re just... gross.

2. Marcus Black: Look if you train your kid to be a killer...

...you’re going to have to expect them to kill you. I mean, you basically ripped apart Mercury’s legs, man. He had to get cyberlegs. Also, you used your semblance to steal his. Which, given that semblances come from aura, and that aura is a manifestation of the soul, is kinda... that’s a deeply personal and intimate violation. Sure, you got your assassin kid. And can we talk about the fact that Marcus was an assassin? It’s not a pretty job. I guess I can see all the abuse--physical and mental--as a good way to train up another assassin, but... geeze, if that’s your goal, why did you use your own kid?! Why not hire some angsty teenager?! Yeah, no, Markus Black stood high on my list of parental monsters... and was only toppled by the arrival of one other.

1. Madame of the Glass Unicorn: She only appeared in one episode and she rocketed to the top of this list, that should tell you something

Let’s be clear here: What Madame did to Cinder is bad enough. It was literally slavery. Enforced by a shock collar. And because the collar looked like a necklace, she pulled it off in front of I don’t know how many clients. Granted, said clients were racists, why else would they be customers at a ‘We Do Not Serve Faunus’ hotel, but keeping her torture just out of the public eye very clearly shows both that she knew what she was doing was illegal and that she was clever enough to avoid detection.

Oh... and then there are her birth daughters.

With Cinder, she was abusive to a dangerous degree. With her daughters, she was permissive, not only allowing but encouraging them to bully their adoptive sister. The whole point of parenthood is to teach your children how to become the best version of themselves, but Madame didn’t even bother to instill a semblance of morality in these girls. She used them as extensions of her will, and they obliviously played along because that was all they knew.

You’d think the biggest monster on the show would be the Grimm woman, but no--it’s some random lady with a hotel.

#RWBY #Analysis #Ranking #I had the urge to make this #Feel free to disagree #Some of this is opinion-based

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ollifree · 4 years ago

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30 OTP Questions - Caedan/Morrigan

1. Who is the most affectionate?

Caedan’s very physical in his affections so you’d think it’s him but plot twist it’s Morrigan.

2. Big spoon/Little spoon?

Caedan/Morrigan. Nine times out of ten Caedan detaches in the middle of the night to enjoy having a bed he fits in.

3. Most common argument?

If Caedan gets it into his head he wants to argue a point there is no getting him to stop. It doesn’t matter if he knows he’s wrong; he’s finally in a place he can talk back without Chantry-enforced consequences and he’s going to take full advantage.

They both have issues with conflict due to their upbringings. For both of them it can manifest as either aversion or heightening, and they’ve each stepped over the line a few times with some minor offense. (That being said they are extremely aware of what triggers the other and avoid stepping on those landmines at all costs.)

As for what they argue the most over: interpretations and castings of spells.

4. Favorite non-sexual activity?

Reading together with their hands linked.

5. Who is most likely to carry the other?

Where did two scrawny mages find the strength to carry an adult, is my question.

6. What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

Caedan loves playing with his partners’ hair. One of the first things he noticed about Morrigan was how long hers was. He considers it an honor to help her with it in the morning. Morrigan likes Caedan’s different smiles. They both like each other’s eyes.

7. What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Morrigan gets clingier, wanting all time with Caedan she can get before the inevitable happens. Caedan sees the possibility of feelings coming and represses the fuck out of them. After it actually sinks in that he’s not in the Circle any longer and the people around him aren’t going to use those feelings as leverage, he gets...softer, I guess is the best word. His jokes and comments aren’t as pointed as he can make them when he goes for riling up someone.

8. Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate?

Caedan used up his best Dad Joke the time he called her Mom-igan. Other than that no nicknames.

9. Who worries the most?

Neither. They both have confidence in the other. That being said, there are times their ring goes off with a sudden spike of the other’s emotion and makes them wonder.

10. Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

They both like trying new foods, so they don’t need to. They both keep in mind the other’s preferences.

11. Who tops?

Morrigan. Caedan gets a safe space to be a mouthy little shit, Morrigan gets to be in control of something for once in her life. Caedan’s 70% committed to Morrigan, 30% committed to her strap.

12. Who initiates kisses?

Caedan, usually. It’s about a 60/40 split.

13. Who reaches for the other’s hand first?

Morrigan.

14. Who kisses the hardest?

Morrigan.

15. Who wakes up first?

Kieran.

16. Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Neither.

17. Who says I love you first?

If you count Morrigan dropping lines like “my love” across Thedas, her. Otherwise uhhhh

18. Who leaves little notes in the other’s one lunch? (Bonus: what does it usually say?)

Neither.

19. Who tells their family/friends about their relationship first?

No secrets in camp.

20. What do their family/friends think of their relationship?

Overall the party has a vibe of “good for them” while the Blight’s on. Alistair becomes firmly of the belief that Caedan can and should do better after Morrigan leaves, and Terron spends most of Witch Hunt scoffing whenever Caedan denies that he and Morrigan are married.

21. Who is more likely to start dancing with the other?

Caedan, though it’s not dancing. He likes to hold her and sway.

22. Who cooks more/who is better at cooking?

Morrigan to start with, but as Caedan gets better at it he starts taking it over.

23. Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines?

Caedan. His puns will be the death of her.

24. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear during inappropriate times?

Both.

25. Who needs more assurance?

They both need it in about equal measure for different reasons. Morrigan needs it for herself and their relationship, while Caedan needs soothing about his Circle traumas.

26. What would be their theme song?

The Mighty Fall - Fall Out Boy

Their sex playlist is just Hozier’s Dinner & Diatribes on loop.

27. Who would sing to their child back to sleep?

They both do, though Caedan is more a storyteller.

28. What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Caedan’s canonically a stay at home dad and I love that for him. On top of caring for (and eventually teaching) Kieran, he does his own experiments in magic. Usually blood magic. He loves experimenting with blood magic.

Morrigan likes making things. Generally they come in the shape of small crafts she puts around their home as protective charms, to look pretty, or just because she can. Sometimes they come in the shape of enchanted objects like a snow-globe with infinitely falling snow, or a fireplace that acts like modern day heating.

29. One headcanon about this OTP that breaks your heart

Caedan very, very nearly didn’t do the dark ritual when Morrigan presented it to him. Logically he knew Morrigan had her own reasons for being there (she certainly wasn’t helping them kill the archdemon out of the goodness of her heart) but it hit hard that this was the reason she had. In the moment, he saw it as a type of betrayal. Because of Alistair (and the other three in the multi protags worldstate) he recognized this was something bigger than him and his feelings on the matter so he agreed to it.

After Morrigan left Caedan was a complete wreck. This was the point in his life when his alcoholic tendencies were at the worst risk of taking over. A large part of it was due to the trauma of growing up in the Circle where people had disappeared on him before and he either never learned what happened to them or they came back Tranquil. Caedan trained himself not to think about it when people vanished from his life and it took a lot of time for the others to convince him it was okay for him to even miss her. Oh, and he tracked time and kept the emotions ring so he knew roughly when their kid was born.

30. One headcanon about this OTP that mends it

I mean they’re together in the end so it works out fine but fuck, you two really had to do this to me on the way there?

#dragon age #warden #morrigan #caedan amell #oc things #otp: i'm making war #i am very slowly working on doing these for all the ships #i do mean slowly #i've been working on them since i reblogged the prompt #work was slow today so i was able to knuckle down and finish these

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callunavulgari · 4 years ago

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Scrapbook 2021 | Part I

For anyone that’s new to this, this is how I keep track of all of the things I enjoy and/or create throughout the year. I have literally been doing this since I had a livejournal. I think the first one was 2011? Maybe? In which case, woohoo, ten years of scrapbooking!

It’s a nice little snippet of my life and helps to organize my brain.

A reminder:

Normal font - Indifferent/Neutral Italicized font - Enjoyed bold font - Loved with an asterisk* - All time favorite (bracketed titles) - Re-watches/Re-reads strikethough - Disliked

Goals are: read 80 books, finish five video games, write more than 20 fics or something larger than 20k, and write either an original short story or start a novel.

Past Years

MOVIES

January

(Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring)

(Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers)

(Lord of the Rings: Return of the King)

Robin Hood

(Hook)

Wolfwalkers

February

(Age of Ultron)

From Up On Poppy Hill

(Tangled)

(Onward)

(The Mummy)

(Hercules)

(Promare)

March

Raya and the Last Dragon

(My Neighbor Totoro)

April

(Hunchback of Notre Dame)

(Tarzan)

(Beauty and the Beast)

Weathering With You

BOOKS

January

A Deadly Education | Naomi Novak [Fin]

Home Body | Rupi Kaur [Fin]

The Sunken Mall | K.D. Edwards [Fin]

Bloom | Kevin Panetta [Fin]

The Angel of Crows | Katherine Addison

All the Stars and Teeth | Adalyn Grace [Fin]

The Adventure Zone: Vol 1 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

I Hope You Stay | Courtney Peppernell [Fin]

Pillow Thoughts | Courtney Peppernell [Fin]

Piraneesi | Susanna Clarke [Fin]

The Ex Talk | Rachel Lynn Solomon [Fin]

February

The Adventure Zone: Vol 2 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

The Adventure Zone: Vol 3 | McElroys & Carey Pietsch [Fin]

The Angel of Crows | Katherine Addison

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink

March

Winter’s Orbit | Everina Maxwell [Fin]

Fireheart Tiger | Aliette de Bodard [Fin]

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink

Fire | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

Bitterblue | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

The Witch’s Heart | Genevieve Gornichec [Fin]

Winterkeep | Kristin Cashore

April

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink [Fin]

Winterkeep | Kristin Cashore [Fin]

The Memory Theater | Karin Tidbeck [Fin]

These Violent Delights | Chloe Gong

(Red White and Royal Blue | Casey Mcquiston) [Fin]

Rule of Wolves | Leigh Bardugo [Fin]

Alice Isn’t Dead | Joseph Fink [Fin]

Not the Girl You Marry | Andie Christopher [Fin]

The Echo Wife | Sarah Gailey [Fin]

The Midnight Library | Matt Haig

Catherine House | Elisabeth Thomas [Fin]

Séance Tea Party | Reimena Yee [Fin]

Lumberjanes vol 1 | Noelle Stevenson [Fin]

PODCASTS

January

The Unseen, Christmas and New Year Special

The Penumbra Podcast, Juno Steel arc, Heart of It All and What Lies Beyond

The Penumbra Podcast, Second Citadel, Strong Arm of Justice and The Priestess’ Fortune

I Am In Eskew, Episode 16

Welcome to Night Vale, Episode 67, 68, and 69

The Magnus Archives, Episode 190 and 191

February

The Magnus Archives, Episode 192-194

The Adventure Zone, Episodes 15-60

March

The Magnus Archives, Episode 194-200 [Fin]

The Adventure Zone, Episodes 60-TAZ BALANCE ENDING

MBMBAM, Episode 1

I Am In Eskew, Episode 17-22

April

I Am In Eskew, Episode 23-END

Alice Isn’t Dead, Episode 18-END

TV SHOWS BY SEASON

January

His Dark Materials, s2 [Fin]

Watcher Entertainment

Buzzfeed Worth It

(Black Sails, s1)

The Queen’s Gambit**

February

Cherry Magic

Wandavision, s1

Watcher Entertainment

The Owl House

(Little Witch Academia)

Star vs the Forces of Evil, s3, s4

Bridgerton

Buzzfeed Unsolved: True Crime

Heaven’s Official Blessing

March

Wandavision, s1 [Fin]

Watcher Entertainment, Puppet History & Watcher Weekly

Falcon and the Winter Soldier

Word of Honor

April

Word of Honor, s1

Watcher Entertainment, Puppet History

Falcon and the Winter Soldier, s1

Kim’s Convenience, s1, 2, 3, 4

Leverage, s4

Shadow and Bone, s1

The Great, s1

VIDEO GAMES

January

Hades, 37 hours [Fin]

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

February

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

Hades, 75+ hours?

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 16 hours

Persona 5 Royal

March

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 45 hours

Persona 5 Royal, 141 hours

Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, 35 hours

Concrete Genie, 3 hours

April

Concrete Genie, 6 hours [Fin]

Animal Crossing: New Horizons, 65 hours

Persona 5 Royal, 160 hours

Monster Hunter Rise, 2 hours

Civ, 5 hours

DELIGHTFUL FIC

January

Modern Rustic by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 22k | “I think,” he says, finally, “that if we looked around this place hard enough, we’d find a rose underneath a—a glass thing, what’s it called—losing petals. Metaphorically.”

easy livin' by sarcasticfishes | Buzzfeed Unsolved (Fallout AU) | Ryan/Shane | 6k | The Wasteland - and Ryan - through Shane's eyes.

(in nocte consiliam by oxymoronic | Bartimaeus | Bartimaeus/Nathaniel | 4k | London, 2003. Britain is on the brink of war, and someone is trying rather hard to kill John Mandrake.)

made of glass the way you see through me by uneventfulhouses | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 19k | Will it always be like this? Ryan wonders, watching Shane lope up the snowy walkway and pushing his way through the front door, humming some jolly old tune in that way Shane’s prone to do. Theatrical, performing for an audience even though Ryan is the only one around.

All Your Stars In View by alpha_exodus | Harry Potter | Draco/Harry | 18k | Life after the war is difficult for Harry, especially when the only thing that makes him feel better is, oddly enough, being around Malfoy. So when Malfoy asks to paint his portrait, Harry can't refuse, even if it means baring himself in more ways than one.

13 Genuinely Awful Things About Steven by thefourthvine | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 10k | Andrew’s learned to like cake, he’s learned to like oysters, and he’s learned to like Steven.

we’ll make a brand new start of it (in old new york) by misantlery | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 10k | “Just to be clear,” Andrew says. “You want me to pretend to be your boyfriend at a party to spite your high school bully and your high school girlfriend and possibly the entire state of Ohio?”

Russian Roulette Croquembouche by misantlery | Buzzfeed Worth It | Andrew/Steven | 9k | “Get that on your business card,” Andrew advises. “Steven Lim, video producer, world traveler, fancy dessert boy. Human cream puff.”

rose-colored boy by juniperProse | Buzzfeed Worth It | Steven/Andrew | 2k | Andrew’s eyes are pink.

Like Wildfire by makemadej | Watcher Entertainment | Shane/Ryan | 20k | “Is this gonna be a thing with you?” Ryan demands. “You can’t keep committing to stuff that no one else knows about! When people online say they want you to be more open and vulnerable, this is not what they mean.”

Scratching the Itch by bendingsignpost | Doctor Who | Rose/Ten | 20k | Her mum had always told her that blokes had only one thing on their minds, but this was taking it to an entirely new level.

lie back and let me unlock you by Lise | The Untamed | Xiao Xingchen/Xue Yang | 7k | Xiao Xingchen, reluctantly, admits to certain fantasies that he has. His friend is happy to indulge him.

in our respective ways by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng & Lan Wangji | 6k | Jiang Cheng has his golden core back. But he seems to have lost Wei Wuxian.

By Proxy by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng/Lan Wangji | 12k | Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, looking for comfort in all the wrong places.

some good mistakes by Lise | The Untamed | Jiang Cheng & Lan Wangji | 18k | Or, the one where Wei Wuxian vanishes and Lan Wangji, reluctantly, asks for Jiang Cheng's help tracking him down.

efforts in a common cause by Lise | The Untamed | Xiao Xingchen/Xue Yang/Song Lan | 12k | Everybody's walked out of Yi City alive. Now it's just three badly adjusted adults (and one badly adjusted teenager) trying to make things work - a project somewhat derailed by a night hunt that turns out to be something else.

swinger of birches by astronicht | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 23k | Lan Zhan is a little witch in the house on the hill, whispering out a love curse. Wei Ying is a witch undead, undone.

let me desecrate you by hkafterdark | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 6k | “Dangerous words.” Wei Wuxian drew back. The flickering candlelight gave him an otherworldly appearance; that, and his beauty, unchanged since the first time Lan Wangji had seen him. “You aren’t afraid to be at the mercy of the fearsome Yiling laozu?”

The Demon Affair by stereobone | Yu Yu Hakusho | Hiei/Kurama | 9k | Kurama accidentally seduces Hiei into a relationship.

i came to win (and i won) by paperclipbitch | The Queen’s Gambit | Beth/Benny | 3k | They play chess, and they fuck.The two things are not the same.

February

Sylvain Gautier Would Love To Try To Solve All Your Problems Through Sex (Hey It Might Help) by Fall Out Boy by harriet_vane | Fire Emblem: Three Houses | Sylvain/Felix | 22k | In which Sylvain wakes up on the wrong tour bus, and refuses to be their sex therapist (unless Felix asks nicely)

μήτηρ, in the Greek by antistar_e (kaikamahine) | Hades | Nyx & Persephone, canon relationships | 37k | At the end of this recounting, she tilted her head and asked politely, Is this not how you have children?Uh, no, said Persephone.

that voodoo that you do so well by veterization | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 18k | Ryan buys a voodoo potion oil at Voodoo Authentica meant to attract Yummy Boys. Appropriately, things happen.

A Bridge Between by Runespoor | Spirited Away | Gen | 3k | Years later, Chihiro moves into a new apartment; her parents help.

the ghost king's bride by arahir | Tian Guan Ci Fu | Hua Cheng/Xie Lian | 10k | Ghosts won't stop giving Xie Lian flowers, Hua Cheng won't stop teasing, and Xie Lian is out here doing his best, man.

Side bitch out of your league by rohkeutta | Captain America | Steve/Bucky | 3k | “I tried to call Sam,” Captain America says, bewildered. He’s sprinting like Usain Bolt and doesn’t sound even a little out of breath. Fucker. “Who’re you?”

cause in your warmth (I forget how cold it can be) by madnessandbrilliance | Promare | Lio/Galo | 7k | Lio is always freezing. Galo is always warm. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the rest.

backdraft by broments | Promare | Lio/Galo | 32k | It happens in an instant, Galo gaping like an idiot while Lio presses forward to defend against the perceived threat, the weapon sparkling but not burning as it kisses Galo's throat.

Yosuke will now die for you! by DragonBandit | Persona 4 | Yosuke/Souji | 5k | ...This, causes problems.

dramamine by brawlite | The Untamed | Song Lan/Xue Yang | 7k | Song Lan is having a bad morning. Help comes from the last person he'd expect: Xue Yang.

Hearth and Home by lady_ragnell | Leverage | Alec/Eliot/Parker | 1k | When Eliot goes to a temple, or when he’s in one place long enough to build a shrine, he doesn’t do it for Ares. He does it for Hestia.

Where One Ends and the Other Begins by kalliopeia | Leverage | Alec/Parker/Eliot | 30k | Nobody’s particularly shocked when the job goes spectacularly sideways because their loot turns out to be magic. Parker and Eliot begin reading each other’s minds, accidental sharing happens, and shenanigans result.

Hungry Thirsty Roots by coolkidroland | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 56k | In which Akira absolutely does not learn to leave well enough alone. **

Without Grasping Yet by Angelic_Ascent | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 8k | Akechi and Akira end up far too cramped for comfort in the Morgana bus. And then they're left alone in Mementos.

Falling Up by KivaEmber | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 2k | “If it helps…” Akira spoke up suddenly, his tone morbidly amused, “I forgive you, for shooting me in the face.”

March

Touch of Forbidden by tirsynni | LoZ | Ganondorf/Link | 2k | Nabooru warned him not to travel to the Spirit Temple. So of course Link went to the Spirit Temple.

breaking the same old heart by tardigradeschool | The Adventure Zone | Magnus/Taako | 11k | Taako and Magnus in triptych: before, during, and after the Bureau.**

your head is good, it’s loyal, it’s clean by Anonymous | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 4k | "Here, I do this all the time."Too quickly for him to react, Taako plucks away one of his golden rings and slips it onto the ring finger of Magnus' left hand.

bruising kisses, whispered confessions by tangerine_skye | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | The trio stop over at an inn for the night. Taako and Magnus share a bed.

i can see what's coming (but i'm not saying it) by pansywaist | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | His breath is still hot on Taako's lips, distracting enough he almost misses the strained whisper: “I thought I was gonna lose you.”

Emergency Consolation in the Pocket Spa by Anonymous | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | If Magnus wants to hug a wizard, Magnus gets to hug a wizard.

together for the long haul by kismetNemesis | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 6k | Magnus and Taako were married on a bright spring day in the year after they saved the world.

thin skin, bruises, and a cold cup of tea by GayFrankensteinsMonster | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 3k | Sleep is for the weak, and Magnus has no weaknesses, except for his own natural curiosity.

tender is the night by dollylux | TAZ | Magnus/Taako | 10k | “It’s just…” He runs a hand through the thick bramble of his hair, gripping the crown of it to anchor himself. He sighs, slumping back against the footboard. “I guess I’m just not very good at one on one. Like, not… not in any way.”

a note is attached to the top of the vial by GayFrankensteinsMonster | TAZ | Kravitz/Taako, Magnus/Taako | 5k | Elves have a lifespan of up to six hundred years. The people that you know don't even come close to that.

Pieces of Memory and Heart by ellemaris | Raya and the Last Dragon | Raya/Namaari | 1k | Raya isn't sure how to heal everything between Heart and Fang, but returning something important to Namaari seems like a start.

the gods laugh by miss_aphelion | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 11k+ | WIP | Wei Wuxian is just getting used to being alive again when he's ripped from the world he knows. He wakes in a place where his sister and her husband live, where his brother doesn't hate him, where the Wen remnants have all survived.

In Your Room, In Your Bed by giraffeter | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji/Jiang Cheng | 25k | After Wei Ying is disowned, Yu Ziyuan forbids Jiang Cheng from letting Wei Ying live with him. Jiang Cheng lets him stay anyway because Fuck That. He tells his parents Lan Zhan is his new roommate instead.

in the blossom season (in the pouring rain) by varnes | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 14k | “Doctor Flowers,” Lan Zhan repeats, pointing at the tiny plum tree, just to confirm that his son is suggesting a magical tree named Doctor Flowers sprouted overnight and made their tame family project turn into a verdant jungle.

34 years old - 5'8" - DL - no-BB by withpractice_ff | Ace Attorney | Edgeworth/Phoenix | 3k | Phoenix finds Edgeworth’s Grindr profile

spinning with the stars above by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 7k | Wangji returns home to Vulcan for the first time since he left for Starfleet Academy, this time with Wei Ying at his side. He’s not expecting Wei Ying and his uncle to be fast friends, but things go poorly in a very different way than he was expecting.

every breath that comes before by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 10k | Or, what if that cup of wine Wei Wuxian drank for Lan Wangji after the Phoenix Mountain hunt wasn't just wine?

never love an anchor by tardigradeschool | Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji | 31k | A fisherman and a selkie fall in love beside the sea. Regretfully, things are never quite that simple.

Be Careful by giraffeter | The Untamed | Song Lan/Xue Yang | 5k | Song Lan and Xue Yang try to survive a week in their shared apartment without Xiao Xingchen as a buffer.

April

running for a soft place to fall by tardigradeschool | The Untamed | Lan Xichen & Lan Wangji | 10k | As he leaves for his coming of age test at age twelve, half-Vulcan Xichen has a goal in mind. The rules of the kahs-wan prohibit taking food, water, or weapons. In accordance, Xichen is bringing none of those things, but he does have a compass tucked into his pocket. He is going to find his father.

an act too often neglected by Ariaste | The Untamed | Lan Xichen/Meng Yao | 60k | The single faceless, anonymous photograph on the profile that catches his eye is shot in elegant black-and-white, and there’s something about the crispness of the focus and the markedly off-center composition that says art, for once, rather than mugshot.The caption below is equally sparse: “5’6. Demanding.”

where you go, I'm going (so jump and I'm jumping) by Aria | The Magnus Archives | Martin/Jonathan | 6k | "I don't think so," Alex said. She looked at Martin. "Is this really how it went?"

Morning, keep the streets empty for me by feyburner | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 6k | Ghosts were drawn to the ring roads.

2am on a saturday by detectorist | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 11k | In which Lan Zhan gets high, slides into Wei Ying's DMs, and somehow ends up having the harmonica played to him at 2am in the morning.

Grief Kindly Stopped by ShanaStoryteller | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 5k | Nothing leaves the Burial Mounds alive.

Boat Basin by downjune | The Falcon and the Winter Soldier | 5k | He thought the 21st century now maybe suffered from an overabundance of classifications for all the different ways to fuck and/or romance a person, but the most important thing—and his therapist had emphasized this—the most important thing was connection.

my touch magnifies by isozyme | Word of Honor | Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishu/Ye Baiyi | 7k | Wen Kexing gets hit with fuck-or-die sex pollen on the way to Longyuan cabinet. Everything would be fine, except Zhou Zishu’s been keeping an unfortunate secret: the nails in his chest mean he can’t get hard anymore.

DELIGHTFUL FANVIDS

January

2020 || Multifandom Mashup

Hades - Official Animated Trailer

Hades Mini-PMV: This Year

2020, I guess

MARVEL || Energy (ft. Easy McCoy + Black Hydra)

obi-wan || give it

2020 ll Multifandom Mashup

Multifandom | Goodbye 2020

Multifandom | Goodbye 2018

2018 Multifandom | MASHUP

His Dark Materials - No Sanctuary

Lyra & Mrs. Coulter | Hurricane

► mrs. coulter || way down we go [hdm]

Wonder Woman || BORN READY

Vikings | The End of the Journey

February

MARVEL || Ready Set (ft. Vo Williams)

MARVEL || Here We Go (ft. Chris Classic)

MARVEL || Is You Ready || The Falcon and the Winter Soldier

Never forget || Hualian - Hua Cheng x Xie Lian AMV

【魔道祖师 / MDZS】Animatic - The First Siege | Safe & Sound

The Jedi Way | THE MANDALORIAN

Multifandom || Going Bad (feat. Drake)

March

Broccolli Casserole--The Untamed

Hey Brother - The Adventure Zone Animatic/PMV

The Adventure Zone: Balance trailer

The Adventure Zone: Balance Arc Trailer (Animatic)

13 Year Olds (A MDZS Animatic by Arcxus)

Multifandom || Die In This Town

DNA | shadow & bone

(Marvel) Wanda Maximoff | Grief

Defying Gravity | MDZS/CQL Animatic

It’s Quiet Uptown | MDZS Animatic

To The Stars

(Marvel) WandaVision || Awaken

Walt Disney Animation Studios | A Magical Journey

We don't have forever.

stop living a fake life.

► Wanda Maximoff | PAINT IT BLACK (+15k)

Multifandom || Take It (c/w Quang Truong) ft. @SEIGE WORLD

Kylo Ren | STAR WARS

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy

April

MARVEL || Natural ft.ImagineDragons

xue yang & xiao xingchen ➤ gasoline

WEN KEXING || GASOLINE

Wen Kexing ✘ Zhou Zishu || Dandelions

Play With Fire - Wen Kexing

TOXIC ~ Wen Kexing ~ word of honor ~ 山河令

(Marvel) Bucky Barnes | Free

Bucky Barnes | Feeling Good

The Falcon and the Winter Soldier || Next Level ft. @7kingZ || (Marvel)

Eternity looking down on us.

The complexity of reality.

Captain America

✗ The Crows | Trouble (Shadow&Bone)

Shadow & Bone | Paint It Black

The secret fate of all life.

DELIGHTFUL MUSIC

January

A Better Version - Jessie Shelton

Start a War - Klergy, Valerie Broussard

Meet Me in the Dark - Melissa Etheridge

ily - Surf Mesa, Emilee

Space Man - Eurielle

To Be Loved - Aurora

In the Blood - Darren Korb

Can’t Help Falling in Love - Tommee Profitt

Astronomical - SVRCINA

Oh Comely - Neutral Milk Hotel

In This Shirt - The Irrepressibles

goblincore + cottagecore

moonlit love letters 🌙💌 (sailor moon-inspired lofi mix)

Moonlight Densetsu Lo-Fi Remix 1 hour version

Peaceful Meditation

February

Never Forget You - Zara Larsson

Is You Ready - Migros

Recomposed Four Seasons - Max Richter

The End - JPOLND

Love Yourself - Sufjan Stevens

Deja | Daniel Roure

Used To Like | Neon Trees

Material Boy - Sir Sly

Willow - Taylor Swift

Overture - Apashe

Evangeline - Josh Garrels

Gris, pt 1 - Berlinist

Inferno - Hiroyuki Sawano

March

BAMBAM - Angie

Dictator - Rei Ami

Demons - Hayley Kiyoko

Runaway - Rei Ami

Deep Blue - Marcus Warner

Brave New World - Kalandra

Nero - The Speed

The Path of Silence - Anne Sophie Versnaeyen

Tuleloits - Kerli

Soft to Be Strong - Marina

Relic - Reeder

Ascension - Gorillaz

Will You Follow Me Into the Dark - Klergy

Voidfish (Plural) - Rachel Mitchell

Raya and the Last Dragon soundtrack

Unicorn Wizard - Ninja Sex Party

Me Too - Meghan Trainor

Umbrella - Rihanna

Colors Flying High - Lollia

Wake Up, Get Up, Get Out There - Lyn

lovely - khalid

Burn My Dread - Lotus Juice

Progress - The Dear Hunter

My Mother Told Me - Rachel Hardy

Savage Daughter - Sarah Ross

Four - Sleeping At Last

April

The Other Side - Amarante

Predator & Prey - Griffin Puatu

As the World Caves In -Matt Maltese

Tell Her I Wasn’t Scared - Dan Thiessen

Esmeralda - Adriel Genet

Woods - AfterInfinity

So Human of You - Shireen

Flags of Rome - Jesper Kyd

Do It All the Time - I don’t Know How But They Found Me

Hummingbirds - Venus Hum

On and On - Curtis Harding

Grand Escape - RADWIMPS

my ex’s best friend - machine gun kelly

Sofia - Clairo

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun - Charlotte Lawrence

Next Level - 7KingZ

Tell Me - Johnny Jewel

Get Out of Town - Firefles

Music for Anglo Saxes

I See Darkness In You - Red Mecca

Satan Is His Name - Holly Golightly

Rocky Trail - Kings of Convenience

Story - NF

Because the Night - 10,000 Maniacs

Use to Be (L.O.V.E.) - Chelsea Collins

Bird on a Wire - Simone Istwa

Huzzah - Nathan Barr

POSTED FIC

January

gonna make you feel, boy | Hades | Megaera/Thanatos/Zagreus | 1,101 words | “You can touch, you know,” she murmurs, satisfaction and anticipation warring within her. Her pulse pounds. Zagreus’s eyes have darkened, his pupils eating up all that color. He looks good enough to eat.

February

how long do we have? | She Ra | Adora/Catra | 1,539 words | “The war is over, Adora,” Catra tells her. Adora hums. “Maybe. Maybe not.”

March

only fools rush in | The Adventure Zone | Taako/Magnus | 5,209 words | “Okay,” Taako says, sitting down heavily. “So. Ancient ritual to… bring people together?”

til my lungs both billow out | The Magnus Archives | Jon/Martin | 748 words | The knife goes in. The tape runs out.

the echo, as wide as the equator | The Untamed | Lan Wangji/Wei Wuxian | 2,927 words | “Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying whispers after it is done.

April

N/A

WIPS | UNPUBLISHED | ORIGINAL

January

1685 words of Buzzfeed Unsolved, tattoo AU

February

N/A

March

3121 words of Magnus/Taako, Stolen Century verse Posted!

April

852 words of Steve/Billy

FANMIXES/GRAPHICS

January

got the morbs: sad/somber songs for sad/somber people

2021: a mix for the year that comes after 2020

Sahara Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Spanish Sahara

Fire Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Play With Fire

Consequences Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Consequences

Paradise Baby: a mix for songs that sound like Paradise Valley

Real Boy: a Zagreus playlist

February

N/A

March

only fools rush in: a taako/magnus playlist

pomegranate seeds: a persephone playlist

make them bow: a megaera playlist

fuck feelings: a taako playlist

til my lungs both billow out: a jonmartin playlist

April

i am my mother’s savage daughter: a playlist for the girl

#heather says what #heather writes #scrapbook #2021

3 notes · View notes

johaerys-writes · 5 years ago

Text

Dorian Pavus/Trevelyan

A World With You, Chapter 23: Traitors and Tales

Tristan finally meets Hawke’s Warden contact, the infamous Loghain Mac Tir. Everyone knows him as the Traitor Teyrn, yet he isn’t the only one whose loyalty is in question.

Read here or on AO3!

----------------------------

“You’re Loghain Mac Tir?” Tristan breathed, blinking in disbelief. “ The Loghain Mac Tir?”

The man before him stood tall and proud in his Grey Warden uniform. The uniform itself had seen better days, worn at the cuffs and its metal buckles dull with time and wear, but one wouldn’t know it by the way the Warden held himself. He rested his hand on his sword hilt, his unflinching gaze fixed on Tristan. He had an imposing presence, seeming to take much more space in the room than a man of his size should, and the look of someone that expected his commands to be obeyed, no matter who he was talking to. And they probably would.

Still. Tristan could not possibly be talking to the Loghain Mac Tir.

“The Traitor Teyrn?” the man said. His brows drew down in a frown, the lines of his forehead deepening. “The very same. I assume you’ve heard all the names. I’ve been a Warden for ten years, yet I’ll never be considered anything else.”

So. It really was him. The man that had risked losing Ferelden and the rest of Thedas to the darkspawn, that had doomed King Cailan and the vast majority of the Grey Wardens to death at the battle of Ostagar. The man that had plotted and schemed to keep himself in power, even when most Banns were against him. The man who had been forced to join an Order he had betrayed, and for all intents and purposes was now about to betray again. That was the man that Hawke had brought him to meet, that would give him answers about the state of the world.

Tristan frowned. They would have a lot to say after this.

“Hawke here tells me that you know why the Grey Wardens have disappeared,” he said, crossing his arms before his chest. “You believe that Corypheus might have something to do with it.”

“That is correct,” Loghain replied, his voice calm and steady. “It is my belief that Corypheus is the key. After Hawke killed him, Weisshaupt was content to forget the entire affair. But if I’ve learnt anything from all those years of being a Warden, it’s that blighted creatures can survive even seemingly mortal wounds. Why not Corypheus?” He turned away, taking a step towards the old desk, where maps and scrolls were laid out. “I began to investigate. I found evidence, but no proof. Soon after, all the Wardens started hearing the Calling.”

“The Calling?” Tristan asked. He didn’t know much about the Grey Wardens, at least not as much as he would like. The Order had a way of keeping their affairs firmly behind the doors of their fortresses, and with the Blight having ended all those years before they had slowly but steadily faded into a state of semi-obscurity. Yet, that “Calling” definitely sounded ominous to him.

He glanced at Hawke, whose face had taken on a sickly pallor.

“So, the Wardens think their time has come,” he said slowly. “That they are being called into the Deep Roads, to make their final stand against the Blight before the Taint takes them. They think they’re… dying.” His fists tightened, and the muscles in his jaw clenched. “You never told me.”

“I didn’t believe it concerned you.” Loghain looked at Hawke over his shoulder, and Tristan thought he saw something akin to compassion flashing in those icy blue eyes, pale like the morning sky on a frosty winter’s day. Hawke’s gaze remained cold. Cold and angry.

A ball of apprehension settled in Tristan’s stomach. From the little he had seen of Hawke, he seemed like a man that was phased by very little. What was it about the Calling that could make him so angry?

Loghain let out a soft sigh as he turned around to face them. “The Calling is a portent, like crows circling the battlefield before the fighting. First, come the dreams. Then the whispers, just at the edge of hearing. That is when the Warden goes to the Deep Roads, to die with honor. But few people, even amongst the Wardens, know that the Calling is simply a sign of the Taint taking over. A Warden that hears the Calling can’t think clearly. All of the Grey Wardens hearing the Calling at once… that’s madness.”

“So, that’s why they’re hiding. They’re all in a panic,” Varric said. He was a little way away, leaning against the wall of the cave, his features obscured by the dancing shadows of the torch above him.

Loghain nodded. “They are.”

“Corypheus is imitating the Calling to scare them. And the Wardens are playing right into his hand.” Tristan shook his head, his frown deepening. “We need the Warden’s help, now more than ever. This is the worst possible time for them to be falling for a trick like that.”

“This is no mere trick, Inquisitor,” Loghain said. “I can hear too, at the back of my mind. Sometimes I catch myself humming it under my breath. I know it’s false, but that doesn’t make it any less real. The Wardens believe it is real, and that is all that matters.”

Tristan rubbed the back of his neck, feeling his blood pounding at his temples. This was bad. Oh, this was very bad.

“Can you hear it, too, Blackwall?” he asked, turning to the only other Warden in his party.

Blackwall drew himself up, his eyes darting to Loghain and then to him. “I do not fear the Calling. Worrying about it only gives it power.”

Hawke’s gaze snapped momentarily to him, before returning to Loghain. His brows were drawn in a thoughtful frown, his lips pinched in a tight line.

Loghain gave Blackwall a look that coming from any other man would have looked like a glare, but the Warden just seemed... perplexed. He was watching them all carefully. At times, it felt as though not a single movement went unnoticed by his pale blue eyes. It probably didn’t.

Tristan pinched the bridge of his nose and took a breath, hoping to ease the pressure of the headache that had started taking hold, an iron cinch around his skull. What Loghain was saying was outrageous. If Corypheus did indeed have that much control over the Wardens, they were all probably doomed.

That was… If what Loghain said was true. And Tristan still had little proof of that.

He fixed him with a hard look. Time for more questions, it seemed.

“We met some Grey Wardens just before coming here,” he told Loghain. “They wanted to take you back to Weisshaupt for questioning. Apparently, the Warden-Commander of the Grey Wardens herself has ordered your capture. Why?”

Loghain returned his inquisitive gaze with a calm and composed one of his own. “Warden-Commander Clarel ordered an urgent meeting with all the Warden Commanders after it became known that all Wardens hear the Calling. She insisted, and most Wardens agreed with her, that a new Blight, perhaps the more devastating to date, is close at hand. She proposed a ritual involving blood magic. A desperate measure to prevent further blights. I protested the plan, called it madness. They tried to arrest me.”

Tristan opened his mouth to speak, but Solas was faster. He took a step forward, straightening up to his full height as he came to stand next to Tristan.

“What sort of ritual is this?” he asked Loghain. “What are the Wardens planning to do?” His voice was… not panicked. Not exactly. But there was the sort of urgency that was now gripping Tristan’s breath, too.

Loghain stared at Solas in confusion for a quick moment, then shook his head. “I do not know. Clarel wouldn’t say how she planned to do it, or where she had gotten the idea for it. Even had she said, I am no mage. Any details would be lost on me. But I know that tampering with blood magic is never a good idea. I wasn't the only one to oppose it, but my voice rings the loudest, I suppose.”

Sola’s jaw clenched, but he said nothing more.

“Where are they planning to do this ritual?” Hawke asked. Straight to the heart of the issue.

“That’s what I’m trying to find out,” Loghain said. “I still have some informants in the Wardens, but they’re getting harder and harder to track down. I need time.”

“Time that, unfortunately, we do not have,” Solas replied quietly, and Loghain shot him a sharp look, his lips tightening visibly.

“Solas is right,” Tristan agreed. “If Corypheus is using them, things are infinitely more dire than originally thought. The Wardens cannot fall into Corypheus’ hands. If another Blight breaks out, there will be no one to stop it.”

"I'll do what I can," the grizzled Warden said, his expression stony and unyielding. "Now, if you’ll excuse me, Inquisitor, I have work to do. There's too much at stake to waste time with idle talk. "

*** Tristan was seething by the time they left the dark cave. Almond was chewing on a patch of sad and rain-soaked grass when he approached her. For a moment, he wished he was as untroubled as she was.

“We should water the horses,” he said, running a palm over her neck. “We have been riding them non-stop for hours.”

Blackwall nodded, and untied his own bay gelding’s reins. “I saw a small a creak on our way here. There were no darkspawn that I could see, but we should be wary.”

The brook that Blackwall led them to was narrow and bubbling, running swiftly over flat and slimy rocks. It was at the bottom of a small ravine, and finding a way around the large stones that seemed to sprout from every bit of ground was tricky, but in the end Blackwall was able to spot a path that would lead the horses there safely. By that time, the light drizzle had turned into proper rainfall, pattering on the hood of Tristan’s coat, running in small rivulets down his leather breeches, slithering into his boots and soaking his socks. If there was a place more miserable than this, Tristan didn’t know of it.

Cursing, he took out his flask from his coat pocket. Thankfully, he had remembered to bring it with him this time. The brandy -Antivan, earthy and aromatic- did work somewhat in warming him up. It didn’t do much to calm him down, though.

Loghain’s information had unsettled him to his very core. If everything he had said was true, then Corypheus had full control of one of the biggest military orders in Thedas, and the only one that could stand against a Blight. And if the Wardens were indeed preparing a blood ritual…

That had given Tristan pause. Why did it suddenly seem like everybody and their aunts were doing a blood ritual of some sort?

His fingers tightened around the mouth of his flask until his knuckles went white. Everything was so complicated and convoluted, that no matter how hard he tried to pick the threads apart, they kept getting tangled. If Dorian were there, he might have been able to talk through all this mess with him. He always seemed to have some brilliant insight to offer that Tristan hadn’t even thought of, no matter the subject at hand. And he always did have a way of asking all the right questions. Had he been there during the meeting with Loghain, he would have pressed the old Warden in a way none of the others could, gleaned every bit of information he held.

That was, if Loghain could be trusted. Something that was still very much in doubt.

The smell of burning smoking leaf reached him, and he glanced beside him at its source. Hawke had come to stand next to him, the soft orange glow of his pipe illuminating his face from within the darkness of his cowl. It unnerved Tristan more than he cared to admit that he never heard him walking up to him.

Hawke exhaled a thick, silvery cloud of smoke, then extended the pipe to him. “Want some?”

Tristan wrinkled his nose and looked away. “No, thank you.”

“Suit yourself,” Hawke replied with a shrug.

He might have been mistaken, but Tristan thought the rain was falling harder now, making him shiver and retreat further into his cloak. Or perhaps it was Hawke’s presence that was making him uneasy. There was something about him, something nagging at him, like an itch at the back of his brain that he couldn’t scratch. He took another sip of brandy to steel himself.

“How do you know Loghain?”

His question was abrupt, and his tone a tad sharper than he had intended. He felt Hawke stiffen beside him.

“I was looking for a friend when I learnt about the Grey Warden’s disappearance,” Hawke said simply. He brought his pipe up to his lips. Inhaled. Exhaled. The smoke blew past his lips, dispersing in the rain and wind around them. “I contacted Weisshaupt under an assumed name. Loghain happened to be in charge, and asked me to meet him. He already had his doubts about the Order at that time, so when he learnt who I was and what I had done, he offered to help.”

“I… see.” Tristan took another sip of brandy. Hawke’s answer had given rise to more questions, none of which would help enlighten him in the slightest. There was something missing still. Something in Hawke’s tone that he couldn’t put his finger on.

“Does my answer not satisfy you?”

Tristan bristled at his curt tone. He opened his mouth, then closed it, thinking.

“I suppose it comes as a surprise that you would trust someone like him for information,” he said carefully after a short while.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

His gaze met Hawke’s in an unabashed stare. “Was that a serious question?”

“I’m not sure. Was yours?”

Tristan frowned with the challenge in the other man’s voice. He took a deep breath, preparing to go straight for the offensive.“Loghain is known across Thedas as a traitor. He has betrayed country and king, and not just once. Now he’s willing to betray the plans of his own Order, an Order he has betrayed the past. You must be able to see my reservations,” he spat, making sure his words packed as much derision as he could fit into them. He turned to gaze at Almond, calmly drinking water, oblivious to the tension that had settled thick around them. When he threaded his fingers through her thick mane he realised they were trembling slightly, and he quickly shoved his hand back within the folds of his cloak. “You’ll be hard-pressed to find a person in the whole of Thedas that he hasn’t crossed.”

Hawke huffed a laugh. “The same could be said of me. Or you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Every time I hear news of you, you’ve made a new enemy. After your support of the mages, half the Templars and the Chantry would want nothing more than your Inquisition declared a heretical organisation and your head on a pike. Does that mean you can’t be trusted?”

“That’s hardly one and the same,” Tristan retorted, his irritation flaring hot and bright. “I had reasons for doing what I did. I did it to make people’s lives better, the only way I could at the time.”

“Anyone you ask will give you the same answer. I did what I did to make people’s lives better, or so I thought. And so did Loghain, I’m sure.”

Tristan scowled at him. “You can’t possibly believe that.”

Hawke turned around to face him, his expression very serious all of a sudden. “You forget that I’m a Fereldan first, Inquisitor, and then a Marcher. I know very well what he has done, and what his actions have cost the world. Still, he’s the only one that can help us at this point. What he has done in the past is irrelevant, compared to what he is willing to offer now. Sometimes, you have to suspend your disbelief in the face of utter chaos. Especially when you have no other options. Which I’m sure you don’t.”

Tristan gaped at him, his pulse beating madly against his throat. He tore his gaze away when he realised he had been staring, clicking his tongue in disgust. Almond whickered softly when he pulled her away from the creek and placed his foot on the stirrup.

“Let’s go,” he called to the others, deliberately steering his horse around Hawke, as if he were nothing but a tree trunk in his way. “It’s getting dark.”

No one spoke a word as they got on their horses. A deep, pensive silence had fallen over them all, the clop of their horses' hooves one the stony ground and the pattering of the rain the only sounds for a long while. They passed through empty villages and abandoned huts, their thatched roofs rotting on sopping wet beams.

The Grey Wardens they had met were not lying about the darkspawn either. Their eerie, guttural sounds and the hollow clanking of their decrepit armours echoed in the grey darkness that spread around them as the day rolled on. They took care not to venture too close to any of the abandoned settlements, staying clear off the main road. The darkspawn, oddly, left them alone. Soon, Blackwall started talking with Varric, and Hawke joined in their conversation, and it almost - almost - felt like things were back to normal. Only they weren't.

As he swayed rhythmically on his saddle, Tristan's head felt as if it were about to burst.

He let out a soft sigh and rubbed his eyes with his free hand, wishing for a miracle that would somehow end his troubles. The lightning strike that fell just a few feet away, making a sad, leafless tree explode, would have been ideal. Alas, his luck didn’t extend so far.

“We should look for the nearest Inquisition camp,” Varric said, his voice muffled from within his hood. “I’m not staying in this rain for much longer.”

“Ah, how I’ve missed this,” Hawke said with a wide smile. His earlier somberness seemed to have completely disappeared, as though he and Tristan had never exchanged a word.“Still haven’t found your love for the outdoors, old friend?”

Varric huffed a laugh, that was broken up by a shiver. “Don’t think I ever will, Poppy.”

“Poppy?” Blackwall asked. “Where did that come from?”

Varric opened his mouth to speak, when Hawke interjected. "Something that happened many, many years ago. I'm sure Varric will spare us all from hearing it.”

“No way I'm leaving our friends in the dark, Hawke!” Varric chuckled. “It's Captain Poppy, to be exact. Do you want to tell them the story, or shall I?"

Hawke rolled his eyes. “I had hoped we would avoid that, but some things are just too much to hope for, aren’t they?”

“You’re damned right they are!” Varric said cheerfully. “I’ll say it if you don’t want to. I’m a far better narrator anyway.” The dwarf straightened up on his saddle and cleared his throat, taking on a serious expression. “It was a dark and cloudless night in Lothering. Our hero - Hawke- was returning from a night at his favourite pub, The Frisky Minstrel-”

“The Tipsy Minstrel, Varric,” Hawke corrected. “She was tipsy, not frisky.”

“Let the writer embellish his stories in the way he sees fit, will you?” Varric protested. “Now, where was I? Ah, yes. It was a dark and cloudless night in the dead of winter when Hawke was approached by a nefarious stranger. “Greetings, young master,” the man said. “I am looking for someone to undertake an important quest.””

“What was the quest?” Blackwall asked. He seemed enthralled in Varric’s story.

“I was just getting there,” Varric said, shooting him a pointed look. He cleared his throat again, making his voice deep and raspy. “”Smuggle five sacks of poppy seeds on a small boat, under cover of darkness, from Lothering to a secret port in Redcliffe,” the stranger said. “That is all you need to do.” Hawke, as you can imagine, was intrigued. The quest was simple. The reward was handsome.”

Blackwall let out a short huff. “I bet you five sovereigns there were way more than ten sacks on that boat.”

“Hold on to your gold, Warden,” Hawke said somewhat gruffly, but the amused smirk on his lips hadn’t faded.

Varric made a dramatic pause, eyeing his audience. Even Solas had shifted slightly on his saddle to listen. Pleased, he continued. “Without hesitation, Hawke took up the man’s offer. “Aye, nefarious stranger,” said he. “I’ll do as you ask. I may be young, but I sure am brave.” Thus, our brave, young hero, still wet behind the ears and hanging from his mother’s skirts-”

“Alright, I think that’s quite enough,” Hawke stopped him, laughing. “You’re still as terrible a storyteller as you’ve always been, Varric.”

Varric’s eyes widened dramatically, and he looked at Hawke with an expression of wild affront. “Well, then why don’t you go on more interesting adventures so I don’t have to embellish as much?”

Tristan didn’t realise he had been listening attentively to their conversation, until Hawke turned towards him. “Don’t listen to him, Inquisitor,” he said affably, his smile dripping with barely concealed mockery. “Varric has a way of coming up with the most extravagant tales. You should hear what he says about you when you’re not around.”

Tristan rolled his eyes and looked ahead of him, scowling. How he wanted to wipe that smug grin off Hawke’s face. With his fist, preferably.

“Now, now, I’ve never talked about Blondie behind his back! Well. Perhaps only once or twice. And when my audience asked for it. Quite insistently, I may add,” Varric replied with a laugh. “Even Chuckles here has been known to enjoy my stories from time to time.” His wide smile didn’t falter an inch when Solas snorted derisively.

“It’s fascinating how whatever interest I lack in your stories, you’ll invent for me,” the elf retorted.

Blackwall let out a loud guffaw. “He’s got you there, Varric.”

The sudden din of battle in the distance cut everyone’s laughter short. Tristan pulled on Almond’s reins and glanced around him, trying to locate the source of the sound. A cloud of smoke rose towards the darkened sky, and it did not look like the smoke of a campfire.

“That must be coming from Crestwood village,” Hawke said, drawing his steed next to Tristan’s. “It looks like they’re under attack.”

“From whom?” Tristan asked, and felt foolish for asking.

Hawke gave him a wry, arrogant smile and kicked his stallion forward, its large hooves splashing in the mud as it picked up its pace. “We won’t know until we get there, will we now?”

#dorian pavus #dorian pavus fic #dorian fic #dorian x trevelyan #dorian x inquisitor #dorian/inquisitor #dorian/trevelyan #pavelyan #dragon age inquisition #dragon age fanfiction #dorian x tristan trevelyan #aedan hawke #loghain mac tir #a world with you #johaerys writes

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swynlake-spill · 4 years ago

Note

Screw Robinson’s ranking. What’s your ranking of the secondary students?

Oooooo yes, I think it’s about time we get a more objective point of view around here don’t we? Now, my sources tell me that the Ashleys’ ranking system was based on a combination of style, looks, and...personality or cool points or something like that. I’m assuming that Wilbur is using about the same system and so I will honor it, but I’ll add it all up to a score out of 30 in the end!

also this took so long will someone please venmo me a quid for coffee or something

Bae “Nemo” Nam-min

Looks: 8/10 he’s legit hottie when he actually puts effort in

Style: 4/10 leaves MUCH to be desired. He has two looks-- sweatpants or skinny jeans. With a friend like Finn, you’d think he’d be more educated

Personality: 7/10 He’s very easy to be friends with, but an airhead and drama magnet. Don’t be fooled by the smile-- he’s more trouble than he looks!

Overall score: 19/30, or about a 6.33 on the old scale.

Ferbs Fletcher

Looks: 9/10 LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS. points off for hair rip

Style: 4/10 why are all men fashion-challenged, why are all boys addicted to the skinny

Personality: 5/10 I honestly don’t know what to make out of Ferb b/c he’s more of a tall, mysterious type, so I’m giving him a very neutral score here. If he opened his mouth more, I might like him less.

Overall score: 18/30! 6 even!

Mei Kusakabe

Looks: 8/10 EEEE she’s a real cutie with serious selfie game!

Style: 9/10 As you all know, I’m super obsessed with her look! Point deducted for those misses, which are SERIOUS misses. Miss Mei needs to float some of those looks past a panel before strutting into school and embarrassing herself.

Personality: 6/10 Here’s where she’s losing points and it’s because she talks to ghosts. Mei! Ignore them, jfc! Save it for your free time!

Overall score: 23/30-- a 7.6!

Jack-Jack Parr

Looks: 5/10 oh boy does JJ Parr need an intervention. I just don’t understand why so many boys’ mothers don’t teach them how to properly care for their hair. Honey, you need to be using a special shampoo and a mousse for those curls!! ldsajflk let me help you

Style: 2/10 ooooh boy does JJ Par need an invention. Everything he wears looks like hand-me-downs from Dash. It was cool when Dash wore it... several years ago!

Personality: 6/10 I think he’s funny! He’s nice! He’s um, creative! Like if I went to secondary and got paired with him on a group project, I would absolutely be doing most of the work but at least he’d probably try. Maybe? Well. I could think of people who I would want to work with less.

Overall score: 14/30 --4.6!

Su Qin

Looks: 7/10. My problem here has everything to do with the weird staring thing. We all know the weird staring thing. None of us like the weird staring thing.

Style: 7/10. I like her style as I’ve said before! I think she’s super unique, but I also think she could go just that extra step further.

Personality: 2/10. Oh honey. I hate having to score you so low, but right now your personality is if Mei’s personality was a sandwich, you’d be the crusts that no one wants to eat.

Overall score: 16/30-- 5.3

Brandon “Barrel” Adamson

Looks: 5/10. PLEASE CUT UR HAIR CUT UR HAIR CUT UR HAIR. There’s a cute boy under there somewhere!

Style: 2/10 Barrel knows one colour and that colour is black. His clothes also don’t seem to fit him very well. Hey Wilbur, can you do something about this?

Personality: 2/10. It’s only fair to give him a similar score as Su, since they like each other so much. He is also the leftover crusts to Lock’s personality sandwich.

Overall score: 9/30-- a 3. Ouch.

Romeo “Roo” DeRosa

Looks: 8/10. He is extremely good-looking! Like that’s a smile that is doing him every favour in the world. I can certainly see why he lured an Ashley in.

Style: 6/10. ugh all these teenage boys exhaust me with their lack of style why even bother having this as a category. what kills me is Roo’s shoes are never clean, like they’re caked with mud. Wash off your shoes!!

Personality: 8/10. I have almost no complaints with Romeo. He’s a sweet boy, he’s hardworking, he’s funny and even talented! I also think he’s kind of gullible...might even go with stupid. You’d have to be to knock up Ashley A.

Overall score: 22/30-- 7.3!

Finn Flounder

Looks: 9/10 hELLO face personally i dont understand why we have not talked about Finn’s face sooner and also more, like we just have dedicated Finn Face Appreciation Time, like, I’m talking artistically speaking is anyone else with me or

Style: 10/10 Colour! Variety! Texture! Pattern! Finn knows how to pick a concept and nail it, and he makes so much of his own clothes!

Personality: 1/10 oh right this is why we don’t talk about his face, it’s because his personality is the equivalent of the puddle of water you squeeze out of a dishrag. He is such a sweet boy with no spine whatsoever. It drive me CRaZY.

Overall score: 20/30-- 6.6

Phineas Flynn

Looks: 7/10. He is cute! He has a perfectly pleasant face with nice features. He is tall, though not as tall as Ferb. He looks, in a word, harmless.

Style: 5/10. Once again, he looks like his mother dresses him, and I mean sometimes that’s a blessing because who knows what he’d look like if his mother didn’t dress him, but way to look like 95% of the teenage male population.

Personality: 6/10. Phineas is charming, but only if you talk to him for about 20 minutes. After twenty minutes, there’s this quality in his voice that will worm inside your head and get stuck there. It’s like nails on the chalkboard. Once you hit forty minutes, you’ll realize he’s still talking (though you haven’t said anything in over twenty minutes), and that he really loves to hear himself talk so then it just becomes an exercise in watching Phineas impress himself.

Overall score: 18/30--6, like his brother. Appropriate!

Haley Long

Looks: 8/10. She’s hella cute! She’s got to be, sharing the genes of one hottie Jake Long!

Style: 8/10. She’s got the whole ‘am i gay’ vibe going for her, which I love. I love when I can’t tell, when it’s like, does she like flannel, or is an avid fan of Lost Girl? She went with Ashley A to prom, so I mean we know she’s at least a LITTLE wlw--I’m getting off track, the point is, I’m into her masculine-feminine energies.

Personality: 5/10. Hayley confuses me. Like, on one hand--she went to prom with Ashley A so maybe she’s an insane person. On the other hand, she ended up with Vee at the end of prom, so maybe...oh yeah, she’s still an insane person. She feels unpredictable, and maybe in a good way, but also maybe I need to run for my life. Haven’t decided!

Overall score: 21/30-- 7!

Dewford “Dewey” Mallard

Looks: 5/10. The Mallard boys are very interesting looking to me, like they have some of the most beautiful hair in Secondary but they prove time and time again they have absolutely no idea what to do with it. They’re also tall, but so skinny, like slendermen. Would like to enroll them all in a zumba class, maybe even yoga.

Style: 5/10. I’ll be honest, my eyes glaze over when I look at Dewey/Huey b/c the only difference between them is the general colour scheme. I like that they do TRY for some individuality.

Personality: 4/10. Dewey is...quiet. And weird. And alone a lot. He actually concerns me a little bit, like is he okay...? It’s not really my job to know, but it should be someone’s!

Overall score: 14/30-- 4.6

Hubert “Huey” Mallard

Looks: 5/10 please see above

Style: 5/10 please see above

Personality: 8/10. I like to think of Huey as the capable, family-friendly Mallard. He’s like a glass of milk with a chocolate biscuit. Everyone likes it, even if it’s not everyone’s favourite dessert. I mean, he’s smart, interesting, he has a wide group of friends! If I had to choose anyone to be put on a group project with, it would be Huey Mallard

Overall score: 18/30-- 6!

Llewellyn “Louie” Mallard

Looks: 5/10. u know what to do

Style: 7/10. GASP. Yes! A decent score! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Louie tries to have a unique style. He experiments, he’s not scared of looking like an idiot--he often looks like an idiot-- but he at least intrigues me. And next to so many boys who literally don’t know what they’re doing, he really stands out from the pack.

Personality: 6/10. While Huey is family-friendly, Louie is an acquired taste. You might really like all those wacky Louie antics, or maybe you’re allergic! He’s definitely trouble all the way around, so my personal opinion is that he’s best in small doses.

Overall score: 18/30-- 6!

Moon Yeongtae

Looks: 7/10. He pisses me off actually because he’s genuinely quite a handsome boy who is genuinely trying to look as un-handsome as possible. I should put this way lower out of sheer spite, but I want to encourage the rest of the teen population to exercise because at least Tae has that going for himself. Take the Mallards to the gym, Tae!

Style: 3/10. He also only knows the colour black and I think I’ve seen him in jeans three times in my life. I’ve never seen a boy so dedicated to sweatpants as a personality trait

Personality: 5/10. Speaking of personality, sweatpants isnt a personality trait! What’s his other personality trait? Arguing with people? Grunting?

Overall score: 15/30-- 5.

Pearl Park

Looks: 10/10. YES our first perfect score! But is there any question when you have a face like that? Just check out her insta. The likes speak for themselves. She’s GLOWING, she’s RADIANT, she’s going to bring this school to its knees

Style: 8/10. Obviously she has more style than 80 percent of this list. It’s only this low because we haven’t seen her full potential yet, or so I like to think. She’s playing it very safe, even if she’s playing it in her own league. I would like to see her push the envelope!

Personality: 7/10. Once again, this is low because we are still getting to know the alluring Miss Park. She seems to be super nice! No enemies yet. But I know there’s something spicy hiding under all the new girl niceties. I would also like to see it!

Overall score: 25/30-- 8.3

Pip Seville

Looks: 7/10. Personally, I like he’s adorable! He might not be topping any Most Handsome Buzzfeed lists anytime soon nor is he anyone’s secret crush but we love a boy who had good hygiene and perfect skin!

Style: 9/10. Yes yes yes!!! He might be a theatre kid cliche, but I’ll take one of those over another awful pair of joggers! Pip would never wear all black unless he’s in tech rehearsal, and we respect that.

Personality: 6/10. Soooo he’s pretty loud and a bit of a risk, like if you partnered with him on a school project, the odds of you getting an A are very high, but the odds of you crying by the end of it because you didn’t meet his expectations are also very high. So you know....take your chances.

Overall score: 23/30-- 7.6!

Wilbur Robinson

Looks: 8/10. Well OBVIOUSly Wilbur is a hottie. Did I deduct points for his new hair. Maybe I did.

Style: 9/10. FINALLYYYY Yet another boy who can dress and dress well! It helps that he can afford nice things of course, but you also have to know how to WEAR the nice things, and Wilbur does.

Personality: 7/10. Wilbur is funny, opinionated, stubborn, a go-getter, generous, and these days, even charitable (those are two different things). Does Wilbur have flaws? Sure. But from what I’ve seen in my ask box, people can’t decide what those flaws are. Is he ... too nice? No wait, he’s actually too mean! He’s an asshole, oh wait, he’s a simp for Barrel. Bla bla bla. Point is, if you add everything up, he’s a decent dude. I don’t agree with all his choices, but I’d also rather hang out with Wilbur than most people on this list!

Overall score: 24/30-- an 8!

Ariel Triton

Looks: 4/10. Boy did the Tritons really mess it up on this one!! I love the pixie cut, but Ariel always lets it grow too long and doesn’t keep up with it. It’s like at this point just shave your head-- tbh, i bet you’d look pretty good.

Style: 4/10. BOY of all the girls she really has no idea what she’s doing either. I admire Alana and Adella deeply for letting Ariel find herself in her own time. I’m just hoping it’s going to work out at this point, maybe we’ll transition from Dumpster Girl to punk rock when they actually get the band going.

Personality: 6/10. You know, I have a healthy level of respect for Ariel. Some people will say she is too fightey, but she stands up for her friends and her beliefs! I’m into that. I mean, she’s usually wrong, but at least she has conviction.

Overall score: 14/30-- 4.6

#Anonymous #i do not want to tag everyone #taste test

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bobasheebaby · 5 years ago

Text

Leonard Hofstader Prompts

1 “This song is never going to stop. Have you ever dealt with something so relentlessly irritating?” “That's a trick question, right?”

2 “Well, you can spend the rest of the day being bitter about this --“ “Agreed.” “I was going to say ‘or,’ but why bother?”

3 [knock knock knock] “NAME?” (x3) “What, NAME!? What, NAME!? What, NAME!?” “Tell me what you see here.” “The blunt instrument that will be the focus of my murder trial?”

4 “At my age, do you know how I'm statistically most likely to die?” “At the hands of your room mate?” “An accident.” “That's how I'm going to make it look.”

5 “Black beans, not pinto beans?” “Yes.” “Double guacamole?” “Of course.” “Lettuce shredded, not chopped?” “Yes.” “No cilantro?” “Nope.” “You understand why I'm doing this to you?” “I do.” “That will be all.”

6 “I often forget other people have limitations. It's so sad.” “He/she can feel sadness?” “Not really. It's what you and I would call condescension.”

7 “Come here, tushie face.” “Tushie face! That is going on twitter right now.”

8 “I like it. I think you're on to something.” “Really? You're not messing with me?” “Not at all. In fact, I have got something for just such an occasion. I was starting to think I'd never get a chance to give it to you. Good job!” “You're giving me a sticker?” “Not just a sticker. That's a sticker of a kitty saying ‘Mee-wow’.” “I'm not a preschooler.” “Fine, I'll take it back.” “I earned this. Back off.”

9 “What are we gonna do?” “We? No, no, no. You had your chance to be ‘we’ for like a year and a half now. Right now, you are you and you are screwed!”

10 “Would someone please turn off the NAME commentary track?”

11 “Oh, I know. This might help.” [Gets a ring out of wallet] “Where did you get a ring?” “I've had it for a couple of years. Not important.”

12 “I'm not sure it's a good idea to take NAME to where wine comes from.”

13 “I'm the king/queen of foreplay.”

14 “Just you wait and see. I'm gonna romance your freakin' ass off.” “That's beautiful. Is that Shakespeare?”

15 “How do I make them stop loving me?” “You could invite them to live with us.”

16 “Hard as this may be to believe, it's possible that I'm not boyfriend/girlfriend material.” “Glad I was sitting down for that.”

17 “I'd make fun of NAME for having boy/girl problems, if I wasn't shocked that NAME has boy/girl problems.”

18 “NAME , you wanna take a break? Your food's ready.” “What are you doing? He's/she’s both happy and quiet. It's like seeing a unicorn and big foot at the same time.”

19 “You guys kiss and hold hands.” “I've seen him/her do it. It's not romantic.”

20 “NAME 's nervous about me leaving. Just keep an eye on him/her while I'm gone.” “Oh, I don't know. Remember what happened when I took care of your goldfish?” “Well, flush NAME down the toilet and get me a new one.”

21 “That was such a fun night.” “Probably 'cause you got to see your man/woman up there rockin' the mic.” “Yeah, yeah. I was a little surprised when you decided to beat-box.” “Oh, that was really an asthma attack. I just sold it.”

22 “Okay, instead of protecting me, why don't you try being excited when something good happens?” “I'm always excited for you. I'm excited that you found this new job where you're making decent money.” “Decent? I make twice what you make.” “Wait, twice?” “Yeah.” “Like times two, twice?”

23 “NAME , why are you making such a big deal out of this? So our roles have changed a bit over the last couple of years. That's the way life is. And I'm sure, in time, they'll change again.” “Great. Not only are you more successful than me. Now you're more mature.”

24 “Thanks for closed captioning my pain, NAME.”

25 “Boy, you're really smart.” “Yeah, I'm a freaking genius.”

26 “Have you considered telling him/her how you feel?”

27 “NAME is going to love this.” “Yeah, it must be nice to have somebody do something so romantic.” “Okay, you know what's not romantic? Rubbing it in someone's face.” “Actually, it can be. But I told you sex doesn't count.”

28 “NAME, do you think I'm funny?” “No. Do you?” “I think I'm hysterical.” “I take it back. That was funny!”

29 “Well you wouldn't have asked me either.” “I would have asked you. In my head. On the way home. While I was having a good cry.”

30 “I missed you.” “You see me all the time. You sure you don't just miss the sex?” “Well, yeah, the sex with you is pretty great. Have you ever tried it?” “I have. You're not wrong.”

31 “Uhh, umm. I'm NAME.” “Really? You don't sound so sure.” “No, I am me.”

32 “Where are my pants?” “You might wanna check out YouTube.”

33 “I'm sorry, dude, she didn't look anything like her picture.” “They never do.”

34 “You know, you two make a cute couple.” “No, no we're not, we're not a couple, we're single, two singles, like those individually wrapped slices of cheese that are friends.” “Did I pluck a nerve there?” “Oh yeah.”

35 “Why can't all guys be like you?” “Because if all guys were like me the human race couldn't survive.”

36 “Is that the song from Toy Story?” “He/She loves that movie.” [emotional] “I do.”

37 “What ya doin' there? Working on a new plan to catch the road runner?”

38 “NAME, give me a beat.” “I will not.”

39 “Thanks for cooking.” “My pleasure.” “That carrot was delicious.” “Yeah. I wish I'd fought harder for the rest of 'em.”

40 “Lots of people wear matching pajamas who aren't dating.” “Like who?” “Like you and your dog.” “Don't rule out the dating.”

41 “I just read about an experiment designed to see if you can make two people fall in love in a matter of hours.” “That doesn't sound right. My research has shown it takes three to five years of shameless begging.” “Honey, neither of us comes off good in that story.”

42 “Ooh, flowers and chocolates? Somebody's trying to get me out of my panties.”

43 “Aw, jewelry. Oh my God, BLANK tickets!” “It gets better. Instead of me you can take someone who will actually enjoy it.” “You are the best boyfriend/girlfriend ever.” “Seriously, please don't make me go.”

44 “This place is terrific. Why have we never been here before?” “The same reason we don't do a lot of fun stuff — you.”

45 “By the way, my leg is killing me. Thanks for asking.”

46 [person a & b are kissing] “Damn it, I can't. I can't do this.” “Is it my tongue stud? 'Cause if that freaks you out, you're in for a real surprise later on.”

47 “Oh Lord, this can't be more humiliating.” “No, no, no, give him/her a minute.”

48 “Is he/she always like this when he/she loses?” “Oh, yes. You should have been here for the great Jenga tantrum of 2008.” “You bumped the table and you know it.”

49 “You've spent time with NAME, can you think of anything he’s/she's fond of that has a bunch of flaws he/she hasn't noticed?” “... I got to go.”

50 “What self-important preening fraud are they honoring this year?” “I'm so glad you asked it like that. You!”

#leonard hofstadter #big bang theory quotes #big bang theory prompts #dialogue prompts #writing prompts #quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy #i live in covid 19 hell

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ash-yam-stew · 5 years ago

Text

OC Interview

Hey ! Thank you @hircines-meatloaf, it's been a while since i did one of those games, and you know i'm so thirsty for it. (sorry it took some time to reply)

In return i'll tag... anyone willing to join. If you read this, consider yourself invited! It's just the shyness striking again... I love you all. 💚

1. What’s your name?

My name is Sejuani.

2. Do you know why you are named that?

I never cared to ask my mother. It may have been used in the past among the Skaal, like many other names.

3. Are you single or taken?

Single.

4. Have any abilities or powers?

I've been introduced to hunting skills pretty early, which includes archery, tracking wildlife, cold climate survival, camping, trapping, skinning, etc... My mother taught me everything she knew about herbology and alchemy. Storn Crag-Strider shared some of his knowledge of Skaal magic, he always said I had a particular connection to our land and favor of the All-Maker.

On a more secretive point, I also have... full-moon related capacities...

5. Stop being a Mary Sue.

Oh... I'm sorry :'(

6. What’s your eye color?

Hazelnut (like my father).

7. How about your hair color?

I inherited my mother's dark brown hair.

8. Have any family members?

The only living family I have now is my father’s brother. I met him recently though. We have... different lives, but it makes me very happy to know him. Family is more important than anything.

9. Oh? How about any pets?

The concept of keeping pets is a bit strange for my people. Our ancestors domesticated goats or chickens for food and materials in the past, we still do. But keeping a wild animal at home for unnecessary purposes disturbs me. Creatures of the All-Maker are free and should preferably stay that way.

10. That’s cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don’t like.

I don't like people imposing their beliefs or opinions to others. This is maybe the only reason I could get... angry. The world is a vast and colorful place, why would anyone want to dictate someone's life to break this diversity ?

11. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

I like creative and useful activities like various crafting (sewing, woodcarving, cooking...).

12. Have you hurt anyone in any way before?

I hope not. I sincerely apologize if I did.

13. Ever… killed anyone before?

Yes... I had no choice.

14. What kind of animal are you?

My mother called me "little fox", for I was discreet and resourceful. I like to be on my own.

15. Name your worst habits?

I tend to flee from civilization... Sociability is what I lack the most.

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?

Our shaman Storn has the ultimate wisdom and knowledge of natural mysteries I seek to reach one day. I know it is not my fate to become shaman but it has always crossed my mind.

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual?

I've only loved men for now. But love just... happens, no matter its form. Doesn't it ?

18. Do you go to school?

There is no school in my village, children learn form their parents or other adults. I tried to read a lot when little, wanting to learn everything on every subject. It seems books do not depict the world as accurately as I thought...

19. Ever want to marry and have any kids one day?

I came to think those things were not for me. It's a dream never coming true, I fear. It would not be... reasonable, considering my nature.

20. Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?

I try to keep my actions as good as possible. If I could inspire people through them, it would be an immense honor. Though, keeping a low profile is more my type. I would probably feel embarrassed if anyone expressed their admiration.

21. What are you most afraid of?

Seeing someone suffering. Especially animals. An agonizing death is... unbearable to witness. Almost all my nightmares are about it.

22. What do you usually wear?

Well, spending a lot of time outdoors, warm and practical outfits. Made out of pelts, wool and leather.

23. What one food tempts you?

A hearty, homemade soup or stew, with tender meat and crumbs of goat or eidar cheese... All warming and made with love.

24. Am I annoying you?

Oh no, not at all !

25. Well, it’s still not over!

I enjoy talking to you.

26. What class are you (low/middle/high)?

There are no such things as social classes among the Skaal. Everyone has their own part to play.

27. How many friends do you have?

The Skaal community is one of caring and mutual assistance. I can honestly consider each of my fellow villagers as my friend. I haven't known my uncle for long, but can count on him too. Teldryn Sero has become, in time, I think, the closest friend I have now.

28. What are your thoughts on pie?

What a... strange question...

(don’t disturb the poor girl)

29. Favourite drink?

Well, this is not something I would usually admit, but I enjoy sipping some mead with juniper berries from time to time, for the taste. The official version is that I drink a lot of herbal tea. I like it unsweetened and woodsy.

30. What’s your favourite place?

Woodlands are my sanctuaries. I've been used to frozen and hostile landscape for twenty-five years, but the few wooded areas on Solstheim have always been my favourites. The forests in Skyrim are magnificent.

31. Are you interested in anyone?

Oh... I... maybe. (looks nervously to a certain "closest friend")

32. That was a stupid question…

No, it's alright.

33. Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean?

I absolutely love swimming in lakes and dabble in calm rivers, even in winter. On Solstheim, the sea is a bit too dangerous to even dip toes. But it is a common thing for my people to bathe in icy waters, for the challenge. It takes a strong mind and body.

34. What’s your type?

Most importantly, a true friend. I could never share my feelings with someone I don't entirely trust and appreciate deeply. I need someone to laugh, travel and talk with. Someone solitary like me, accepting.

Also, I... find Dunmers interesting.

35. Any fetishes?

I don't really know. Maybe my fondness for the wilds tends to make me find camping in the wilderness... appealing.

36. Camping indoors or outdoors?

What a good transition. Well, the answer is expected, but camping outdoors is more of a habit than a preference. It is the closest to Nature and makes me feel at ease, not to "encroach" on anyone's territory. But I know this is not without risks and survival is also about safety. When given the chance, the indoors solution might be more reasonable.

#tag game #oc : sejuani #Skyrim #Elder Scrolls #to read with a light Nord accent #i wanted to make a small illustration but aaaaah...

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incorrigible-rapscallion · 5 years ago

Text

A Serial Killer’s Guide to Men and Manslaughter -- SCRIPT (pgs. 30-44)

[pgs 1-2; 3-7; 7-14; 14-23; 24-30]

EXT./INT. DAVID'S CAR - NIGHT - TRAVELING

David drives throughout the town of Pleasant Grove at night. Achilles sits in the passenger seat.

David white-knuckles the steering wheel and gear shift as neon store signs and street lamps pass over his troubled face.

MONTAGE: DREAMSCAPE #2

David, once again, replays images of day's events--this time featuring his blind date dinner.

Key images that David focuses on are:

-Thomas seated at their table, waiting for David to arrive -Achilles rolling on the floor with oddly docile behavior -Thomas with a cheerful expression -Thomas with a concerned expression -Thomas with a vacant expression -Thomas cutting into the meal's tenderloin with a steak knife

This segues into another sequence of implausible scenarios involving Thomas killing someone during their dinner:

-Thomas breaking Achilles' neck while the dog waits for a belly rub -Thomas grabbing the Waiter's pen and stabbing it in their neck -Thomas lunging across the table to, once again, strangle David

Like before, all of the killings are concluded with a flirtatious wink.

END OF MONTAGE:

David has stopped breathing and Achilles licks at his hand on the gear shift. David then pets Achilles' head, almost aggressively, as he calms down.

David notices that the lights are on inside the PLEASANT GROVE POLICE STATION as he approaches it at an intersection.

David abruptly pulls into the parking lot.

DAVID (to Achilles) Let's do the fandango, buddy.

He exits the car with Achilles and single-mindedness.

INT. PLEASANT GROVE POLICE STATION - NIGHT

David enters an empty yet nostalgically-attractive lobby. It splits in two different hallways. There are small signs above each door that indicate each department, reminiscent of 40s-style administrative offices.

David zeroes in on the "Records and Evidence" sign. He walks forward confidently despite his shoes making squeaky sounds against the antique hardwood.

INT. RECORDS AND EVIDENCE OFFICE - NIGHT

David reaches a room not unlike a library, teeming with shelves of files. There is a WOMAN WITH BIFOCALS humming to herself at the back of the stacks.

David clears his throat. The Woman doesn't respond.

DAVID Excuse me, ma'am?

The Woman still doesn't respond, but instead shakes her hips at the song she is humming. Eventually, after an exaggerated lip sync performance, the Woman notices David with a start.

WOMAN WITH BIFOCALS Cheese and crackers!

The Woman comes forward to a banker's desk. Her name tag is upside down and reads, "Dotty."

DOTTY What can I do for you, honey bun?

DAVID I'm here to request any cold case files that you might have for missing persons.

DOTTY It's awfully late for something like that. Usually we need something first, what is it called...?

DAVID A release request?

DOTTY No, not that...Actually, yes. A release request.

DAVID Can I get one started then?

DOTTY No.

DAVID Why not?

DOTTY We don't have any, what did you say you needed?

DAVID Missing persons reports, specifically any that are on "Cold" status.

DOTTY We don't have any of those.

DAVID Any of what?

DOTTY Missing persons, cold cases.

DAVID I don't understand. You mean to tell me that in all of these records, there is not one missing person file? Or a cold case?

DOTTY No.

DAVID What do you mean, "no"?

DOTTY No, we don't have any missing persons. This is a safe town. Nothing ever happens here.

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON (O.S.) What seems to be the problem?

Sheriff Livingston enters holding two coffees.

DOTTY Oh, nothing darling! This young man just wanted to see, what did you say you wanted?

DAVID Missing persons reports.

Sheriff Livingston strides forward and places one coffee on Dotty's table. She uses her free hand for Achilles to sniff before patting him on the head.

DAVID I think you can gather why I might want to look into them, Sheriff.

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON Please, call me Hannah. Everyone does. As a matter of fact, I wanted to catch you after the town hall last night. I was serious when we met at the park; I'm incredibly interested in picking your brain on the criminal mind. We don't get a lot of action here in Pleasant Grove, so it'd be nice to "talk shop," as it were, with someone from the big, bad city.

DAVID I just have an overactive imagination. Nothing special.

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON On the contrary, I think an imagination is something that is uncommonly special. Dotty can relate to that, right Dotty?

DOTTY (searching for her glasses, which she is already wearing) Hmm?

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON But back to your request. You said you wanted to look at missing persons reports?

DAVID That man at the town hall seemed to think that the whole county is rife with unsolved crimes. Why would he so fervently believe that if, as you say, you don't "get a lot of action here?"

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON I've never seen that man before. I think that he just wanted to cause a controversy over pure speculation. It's possible that he was a journalist from Pleasant Valley wanting a scoop on us for whatever reason.

DAVID Regardless, I'm curious about the missing persons that he brought up. Dotty informed me that you don't have any.

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON That would be correct. All of our cases are closed. I've gone to great lengths to make sure that we, as a department, provide answers for families that are looking for them.

DAVID What does that mean?

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON We have a large forest and mountain ranges that are prone to landslides surrounding this area. This means that all the deaths and disappearances in our town have reasonable and natural explanations.

DAVID What does the State have to say about your lack of hard crime reports?

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON They've been more than understanding about our situation. We, quite tragically, had a fluke electrical fire break out in our old department building. All of our old files, including our former sheriff, went up with it. This room contains all the documents that we were able to recover.

David takes note of the singed file-folders on the shelves and Dotty, as she has gone back to humming in the stacks.

DAVID I suppose that is, as you say, a reasonable and natural explanation. Since you have nothing here to offer me, I'll be on my way.

SHERIFF LIVINGSTON As will I. I'd love to stay and chat, but I have some paperwork to take care of--burning the midnight oil today, right Dotty? (Dotty continues humming and dancing) Please don't be a stranger, David.

DAVID Likewise, Sheriff... Dotty...

David waits for Sheriff Livingston to leave. She doesn't, instead clearly waiting for David to leave first. They are at a standstill of manners.

Sheriff Livingston breaks with an amused smile and salutes Achilles as she exits the room.

David promptly pulls out his notebook from his back pocket and begins writing:

"Sheriff--expert liar, covering her tracks? "No records, no suspects, no victims "Pleasant Valley?"

David exits but Dotty, who has been humming and dancing, removes her glasses and keenly watches him as he leaves.

EXT./INT. DAVID'S CAR/PLEASANT GROVE - NIGHT (TRAVELING)

David opens the door to the passenger side and Achilles takes his usual spot. David climbs in and stares out the windshield into the darkly lit park across the street.

He turns the keys in the ignition. He pulls onto the main road through town and glances over at Achilles.

EXT./INT. DAVID'S CAR/PLEASANT GROVE - DAY (TRAVELING)

When David looks back at the road, it is daytime.

He comes to the intersection that houses the Wright Place Butchery and the cafe at which the RHS ladies sit, kibitzing.

This time, David takes note of the RHS ladies ogling him. He grimaces and turns back to a city and mile sign at the intersection.

The sign reads: "Pleasant Valley 36 / Pleasant View 52"

David continues on, the scenery still as picturesque as before. Once again, David drives through winding roads on a mountainside. A beautiful cloud formation hovers in and around the area.

EXT./INT. DAVID'S CAR/PLEASANT VALLEY - DAY (TRAVELING)

At last, David enters the town of Pleasant Valley.

Unlike the quaint feel of Pleasant Grove, Pleasant Valley is upscale and styled after mid-century modern architecture.

David locates the City Hall and police station easily.

David parks and locks eyes with Achilles.

DAVID Let's go get some evidence, bud.

INT. PLEASANT VALLEY PD - DAY

This police station has an art-deco design. It is bustling with activity, but no one pays David and Achilles any mind. David navigates his way to the Records and Evidence department.

A SULLEN STUDENT wearing beatnik clothing and reading a pulp novel sits at the intake counter.

SULLEN STUDENT State your purpose and reason for existing.

DAVID Purpose? To catch a killer. Reason for existing? Still trying to figure that out.

SULLEN STUDENT (smirks, but doesn't look up from their book) You're the first guy to actually give me an answer. (finishes page and sets it down) What can I do ya for?

DAVID I'm here to start a release request for any missing persons or cold cases that you have on file.

SULLEN STUDENT No need. You can look at anything you want as long as I supervise and the documents don't leave the building.

Sullen Student slinks off into the deep filing area.

SULLEN STUDENT (O.S.) Also don't take any pictures or scans of anything. You can take notes, I guess. And sign in, I forgot to mention that.

DAVID (signing the sheet on the desk) What got you into police work at such a young age?

SULLEN STUDENT (O.S.) I needed the volunteer hours.

Sullen Student enters with a push cart of filing boxes and comes around in front of the counter.

DAVID Volunteer hours?

SULLEN STUDENT For Honor Society. I'm the president. Sullen Student goes back to their seat behind the desk and continues reading their book.

David sets up shop at a neighboring table and opens the first box labeled "Status: Cold. 2010-[blank]"

The file on top contains a supplemental homicide report.

DAVID (mumbling) Let's do the fandango.

SULLEN STUDENT Whatever floats your boat, dude.

MONTAGE: GATHERING EVIDENCE

David focuses on the descriptions of the case. He starts a new page from the back of his notebook and begins copying down information.

Key phrases jump out:

Mixed weapons used; unknown relationship to victim; unknown circumstance proceeding murder

David flips to the next file and begins creating a list of information with tallies for similarities between them.

Key phrases jump out from the other cold case files:

Cutting instrument used

Strangulation used

Blunt instrument used

Hands, fists, feet, etc. used

All the files that David is interested in have unknown relationships and circumstances proceeding the murders.

By the end of the box, David has compiled a list with the most common methods used: strangulation and mixed weapons having the highest number of tallies.

David starts back into the stack again, this time making a list of the victims' occupations.

Key phrases jump out:

Real estate owner

Dentist

Dairy owner

School district superintendent

County recorder

Justice of the peace

And-- most damning of all--the former elected city sheriff

David gives a shout of surprise.

END OF MONTAGE:

SULLEN STUDENT Whoa, you alright there? (sitting cross-legged on the floor, petting Achilles) I tried to ask earlier for permission to pet your dog, but you were kinda out of it. I get that way too sometimes. Hyper-focus and all that.

DAVID Hyper-focus... Could you tell me your perspective on what happened to the former sheriff?

SULLEN STUDENT What's it to you?

DAVID I'm catching a killer, remember?

SULLEN STUDENT (not so sullen anymore) So here's the thing--no one believes me, but I think that this whole place, this whole city I mean, is corrupt. I'm talking mafia-level conspirators. It's the only makes sense. I've watched a ton of organized crime documentaries and there is definitely something shady going on here. For instance, think about all those files you just looked through--yeah, I've read them too. (leaning forward intensely) Almost all of those cold cases are eerily similar, right? They all have immediate dead ends. It's almost like the investigators didn't want to follow up on these cases. They're covering their tracks by sheer negligence. I think the last sheriff got in their way or made someone mad, so he had to get the axe. But everyone here doesn't seem to notice; they are all super happy with everyone's replacements. But not me, I see the truth of it all. And it's definitely the mafia.

IRATE MAN (O.S.) Don't tell me you're trying to convert yet another poor soul into your tin foil hat club, Casey Andrews.

Irate Man enters the room. He carries a folio and a stack of developed photographs.

CASEY Awww, I hadn't even gotten to the best part yet with the mind control chicken nuggets and secret bunker under the football field! (taking in David's shocked expression) I'm kidding. That would be crazy.

Irate Man greets Casey from the floor with a one-handed yet intricate secret handshake.

IRATE MAN Sorry, do I know you?

DAVID No, but we were at the same town hall meeting a couple of nights ago. In Pleasant Grove.

IRATE MAN Ah, right. I remember your dog. You probably remember my... cross-examination of Sheriff Livingston.

DAVID That's one word for it. You actually inspired me to investigate the missing persons reports in town. Or, lack thereof.

IRATE MAN It's freaky, isn't it? All those files and not a single missing person. Even though our newspaper here in Pleasant Valley has printed a number of disappearances and suspected homicides in the area. Strange stuff. Name's Mick, by the way. Mick McMillan.

Mick sets his folio on the desk and David stands in greeting.

DAVID David...Truelove.

MICK (shaking David's hand like it's a contest) Huh, you should write bodice-rippers with that kind of last name.

CASEY Actually, he writes crime thrillers. He's pretty prolific too.

MICK A novelist, eh? I'm not too big on reading fiction, more of a "just the facts" man myself.

DAVID Understandable. Now, what do you think is happening around here? Casey says that it's--

MICK --the mafia, right?

CASEY Well, it is! You just refuse to see the truth right in front of your eyes!

MICK I'm interested in answers, that's all. I am a private investigator and I've been hired by a "concerned citizen" to uncover the systemic issues with all these supposedly solved cold cases. As cliche as it sounds, every town has its secrets. I'm simply attempting to unravel them.

DAVID Sounds daunting. But you also didn't answer my question. What do you think is going on? Mick shares a dark look with Casey.

CASEY Go on, tell him. He's legit. He's been pouring over these documents all day just like we both did.

MICK I think...that there is an active serial killer in this area.

David schools his expression and closes his notebook tentatively, hiding it behind some papers on the table.

MICK I know, I know, that sounds outrageous. Casey's mafia conspiracy is probably more likely to happen than a murderous psychopath rampaging across Pleasant county. But... actually, let me show you what I'm talking about.

Mick pulls a desk lamp over to his folio folder and takes out his stack of developed photographs. Casey and Achilles get up off the floor and observe what Mick has to offer.

MICK I listen to the police scanners as much as the next guy. But whenever a call is placed on any hard crime activity or disappearance, I try to head out to where the action is. This is what I have to show for it...

Mick selects a photo from the stack. It is of a crime scene, but the focus is on the crowd that is gathered around the cordoned off perimeter.

MICK (CONT'D) You know what they say about serial killers liking to stay behind and put themselves in the hubbub after the fact. Well, I've noticed that there are a couple of guys that could be our unsub...

Mick fans out other photos which he has circled familiar faces in red ink at different crime scenes.

All the faces are unfamiliar. Except for one--Thomas Wright. He is caught on film at three sites.

David breathes heavily and Achilles whines. He scruffs Achilles' fur in order to hide his reaction.

MICK I believe that these guys are the biggest break I've gotten so far. I've already met with two of them. They seemed pretty normal and had credible alibis for being sighted at multiple crime scenes. But I haven't ruled them out until I meet with the other three.

DAVID That's reasonable, I suppose.

��MICK Say...you haven't noticed any of these fellas in and around Pleasant Grove, have you?

DAVID Sorry, no. I just got into town a couple of days ago. I'm taking care of some...estate things.

MICK Then I recommend that you keep your eyes peeled. I stay mostly on this end of the county but it would be nice to have boots on the ground in the Grove community, if you know what I mean.

DAVID I don't how much help a novelist will be then for your investigation. I was just curious about looking into a real mystery.

MICK Can't fault ya about that. Say, here's my number and email. Get in touch if you ever want to take your little mystery a step further.

Mick picks up one of the photos with Thomas' face on it and scribbles his info on the back.

David takes this as his cue to begin packing up the documents in their respective boxes.

CASEY Hey, don't worry too much about making sure it's all neat and orderly. I'll take care of it tomorrow. It'll give me something to do other than wait for the sweet release of death.

Casey places the boxes back on the push cart and takes them behind the intake counter. Casey turns off the lights to the filing room and closes down the intake window.

David hurriedly straightens up and waves goodbye before exiting with Achilles.

Casey walks back to Mick, who affectionately ruffles their hair.

CASEY Dad, you're ruining my cool! And I worked so hard at it!

Casey notices David's notebook still sitting on the desk.

CASEY It looks like Mr. Truelove forgot this. We should've gotten his number...

Mick inspects the outside and inside flaps for contact information.

MICK Hmm, no address... Oh, now that's interesting...

Mick turns to the page in which David had jotted down his initial observations of the shop owners when he first arrived in Pleasant Grove.

Mick focuses on the most important line:

"Mr. Wright--serial killer"

#a serial killer's guide to men and manslaughter #netflix call me #hannigram #hannibal s4 #nbc hannibal #hannibal #screenplay #screenwriting #script #original work

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stusbunker · 6 years ago

Text

Known: Topside Turvy

A Supernatural Dark Fan-fiction

Featuring: Dean Winchester x Female OC, Dean x Demon!Reader

Series Masterlist

A/N: I have included dates relevant to air dates for reference points. I try not to repeat information you already know, but please ask if something doesn’t make sense! xoxo Stu

Warnings: Torture, captivity, demons, Possession, necromancy, corpse disposal/ desecration, murder, eating raw beef, autopsies, animal death, angel kills, show level violence, Slow Burn. More warnings to come. Each Chapter will have its own warnings, because I am generous like that.

Earth Date: April 18, 2013

Location: Hell, and its Earth-level operations

The king knew the Winchesters were interfering with his domain; all too soon his rage reverberated throughout every corner of Hell. Your pacifism had somehow gone unseen, leaving you to ponder their motivations in silence as you focused your energy to quell your panic over betraying the crown. Crowley worked in secret with the kidnapped prophet under the strictest of security. Today the rumors started: he decided to use a new angle to break the petulant former honor student. The king of Hell was holding a casting call. Any demon who thought they had the chops to portray the Winchesters well enough to coax information out of the paranoid prophet. ‘Potential side parts available, real talent only apply.’

Curiosity got the best of you, after a few hours you tracked down the where and when. Upon breaching the portal to Earth, you had to recite your resume and why you thought yourself qualified to audition for the challenge.

“I was tortured by Dean Winchester.” You said it plainly, as if it was a long-forgotten past, and not a constant pining at the base of your every thought.

“When were you on Earth last?” the first gatekeeper asked, unimpressed.

“He tortured me here, before my, evolution,” You used your hands, hoping your point got across. When his dead eyes blinked back, you added. “Under Alistair’s tutelage?”

“Line B,” he nodded behind him. “Follow the stairs to the vessels. The boss wants us all in meat suits for the glamor to work.”

As you found the appropriate entry gate, you shuffled along the slight incline of the dusty floor. You had yet to find anyone ahead of you in your assigned queue. As the despair began to dissipate, you knew you had left the true confines of Hell behind. The magical bindings along the fences kept you weak, unable to flee and the atmosphere slowly softened your membrane sublimating you into a shapeless cloud. The Den of Bodies reeked of fresh death, human forms deposited like unwanted toys, empty from either recent possession or the tinny aftertaste of necromancy.

You soon found a male form close to Dean’s height and followed the cramped line illuminated with an icy blue letter “B”. Slowly you adjusted to the feel and weight of the vessel, it was hollow and odiferous in a way a corpse could only be. Walking came quickly and as you rounded the next bend you eventually found the demon ahead of you in the line, which thrice wrapped around a broad chamber. Within the darkened space more servants in human skin were transforming the old warehouse into a mirage of a crumby tugboat in a forgotten American freshwater harbor. Suddenly a fresh panic overtook you. Besides the very slim possibility of being transfigured into the man that was the focus of your emotions for centuries, what were you doing here?

In the end, you improvised. You didn’t make it passed the first round of auditions, didn’t even get a chance to perform for the king himself. But that didn’t stop you from observing the surveillance goons’ schedules and precisely orchestrated operation during the days you waited in line. On a whim, after your second rejection, you hung back and hid in the Wardrobe Department like a forgotten costume change. It was the quietest space you had occupied in decades, content to wait out the auditions like a rat waiting for the carnival to close.

And what a closing night; first they sent the last of the surviving actors back downstairs. All but one of the staggered portals sealed and secured by patrols. Since the Wardrobe Den was on this side of the portals, but out of the way of their duties, it was the last thing searched. So, when you heard voices whimpering about clean up detail; you got creative. Standing you dragged a body by its feet to the top of the heap.

“Wait, I thought we were on body dispersal?” A confused elderly Asian suited demon complained.

“I got sent from deliveries, figured we would take a handful so as not to draw attention once we are done with the project,” You shrugged, grabbing another body to stack.

“Whatever, man, let’s just fry the ones we need to before the boss comes back?” The first demon’s lanky partner bought your story, helping you even out the third body on your pile. You swung around, pulling the collected stack of bodies back the way they came, hoping to find a true Exit to the outside world. There was a goddamn sign, green like toxic ooze, lighting your way. The slow trudge of dragging bodies alleviated as you found an old dolly on the wings of a loading dock.

“What are you doing?” A demon with a security uniform on asked as you plopped the last lifeless corpse on to the metal cart.

“Hiding bodies, what does it look like I’m doing?” You sighed, breathing in the outside air for the first time in a century, so close to freedom you could taste it. An unraveling sense of possibility exploded among your thoughts.

“Okay, on your way, grab some Pad Thai? The golden boy in there is getting pretty obscure with his food requests. We got another truck handling the rest of the laundry list.” He handed you a scrawled-on shred of paper. You took the assignment in slight disbelief as a dubious grin broke onto your vessel’s face. Could demons get any stupider?

Earth date: April 21, 2013

Location: Janesville, CA

It was oddly damp and cool, but out in the open the afternoon sun gave off such warmth you would have stayed out until sunset. The dead man you had been wearing since Hell had caused some trouble and you were in the market for a new ensemble as you strolled down the gravel drive toward the ramshackle homestead, just enjoying the spring day. The bull had sensed you coming, an agonizing moan tore through its massive throat before it sunk to the ground. Its fear was the dinner bell, you quickly hopped the pasture fence to play with the anguished creature.

A shotgun blast shot out in warning behind you, the old farmer calling out as he approached, “Get back now!”

The beast’s blood had soaked the dirt beneath your knees, your hands and face caked with the sticky liquid. The knowledge that this was its true death and that it had happened at your hands flowed through you, an unbridled power. The muffled shriek that came from the man’s mouth as you spun to face him was icing on the cake. You quickly approached him, the urine snaked down his jeans and on to his shaking legs. He couldn’t form words before his heart gave out with your tendon-riddled smile. You left him for his Reaper and marched to his backdoor.

“Was that really necessary Harold!” The old woman bellowed from the next room. “I swear I need to hide that gun, with your eye sight,” her voice trailed off as she looked up to see all the blood-soaked six feet of your vessel in the door way. She crossed herself, before you smoked out of the mess and into her praying throat. Hopefully, you had caused enough mayhem for those pesky little hunters to start poking their noses around.

You cleared her throat and went for the phone, dialing the emergency line. “Yes? Hello? Oh god, this man attacked Simon, and now I think Harold’s had a heart attack. Please, send help—” You waited on the line, frantically trying to give the dispatcher the details. Before the sirens were on the horizon, you walked your old vessel back out to the pasture and planted two solid blasts to the body. Your short stay in the old woman had given her quite the headache and she quickly passed out beside the telephone. You jumped into Harold before he was loaded into the back of the ambulance and taken to the county coroner.

Earth date: April 23, 2013 (Just before Pac Man Fever)

Location: Lassen County Government Office, Susanville, CA

Chloe Collins tightened the belt of her trench coat, realizing it would be too warm to use soon. Her etched blade rested carefully on her belt, hidden yet accessible in its personalized leather sheath. She checked her watch before taking another sip of her gas station coffee-hodge-podge of regular Colombian roast cut with their water and powder cappuccino concentrate. She was waiting on Roger or Geoff, not sure who would draw the short straw, and therefore would have to put forth some effort in the appearance department. While the other got lucky and was due to be scoping out the cleared crime scene. She hadn’t slept in two days when the omens came up on the radar. She had gotten into town early the night before, allowing her some rest before back-up or county offices were ready for her.

She was giving Geoff/ Roger ten more minutes, or she was going in alone, slackers. When her phone rang, she didn’t even check the caller ID. “If you are going to bail, save it, I would have been done here if I wasn’t waiting on you two.”

“Well, good morning to you too, Cease,” a rich baritone replied. She froze and pulled her face away to check her guess.

“Yup, just did the assumption ass thing, whatcha need Winchester?” She leaned back against the driver’s side door of her pick up as she listened to his very detailed request. “If you had a prophet all this time, how come you didn’t share some winning lotto numbers?”

She heard the exhaustion over the phone, the snark was to draw out the conversation as Roger had finally shown up. CC relished in making him listen to her side of the line as he stewed in apologetic, if not awkward intrusion.

“Nah, not that kind of prophet, think decoder ring. Anyway, you see anything or if you get a demon talking, send a line. Alright?” Dean wrapped up his request.

“Alright. Take care.”

“Yeah, you too.” He ended a little too sadly.

CC slid the phone into her pocket to smile innocently at Roger. “Since you’re late, you get body duty, I’m going to catch up with the Sheriff.” He rolled his eyes and nodded, letting her lead the way.

The refrigerator was nearly empty when they slid the body of the old man you rode into the middle row, chest height for easy access. You were fascinated by the vivisection and organ removal, leaving the doctor to do his job. The Sheriff was friendly despite being extremely uneasy about the details of the case. You had to hold back from giving him the scare of his life more times than you could count. “Psychopaths are bad for PR,” you heard as the evidence was verified and files were exchanged. Now, in the cold and the dark you waited, hoping you had hit all the neon warning lights that would bring somebody useful within arms’ reach.

The coroner began muttering under his breath, something about the Feds and not having time for this. He quickly brought out the focus of the investigation, the body of your escape vessel that had been dead for weeks when it mutilated a prized bull and took two blasts to the torso. Another man’s voice began asking questions, weird substances and oddities in the coroner’s findings.

“Yeah, you know what, I haven’t gotten it sent out yet, but his ears were lined with this powder,” there was scraping and shuffling before he handed the vial to the investigator. “Besides the whole, eating a cow raw thing, that was weird.”

“Right.” The stranger listened as the coroner read all the medical jargon from the report back to him. “Thanks, Doc, I think I will just check the other body quickly while I wait for my partner to finish up with the Sheriff.”

“Harold Simmons, not much weird there, poor guy,” the door opened, and you felt the tray jostle the stiff that you were squatting in. Resisting the urge to tear open the eyelids and treat both the men to their own wet shorts, you laid still, waiting for the hunter to show his true colors. The funny thing about Hell was that it hadn’t taught you how gullible and disposable humans were. The constant torture and regeneration of the soul made any act possible, but back on Earth a hang nail could practically do them in. You had yet to perfect the art of handling them properly, your own strength and distaste winning over patience and inconspicuousness. When the coroner finally shut the door behind him, the hunter dug the vial of sulfur from his pocket, cracking the safety seal and sniffing away like any asinine teenager in chemistry class.

“Blech, should have known.” Roger capped the sample and put it back among the doctor’s collected evidence on a cart.

“You know, you don’t smell like daisies either,” you replied, sniffing the air haughtily from your seat on the metal rack.

The hunter balked at you before throwing a baggie of salt at your face. The slight residue on the exterior of the plastic seal smarted, but the contents remained secure as the bag bounced off the grizzled jaw of your meatsuit and fell to the floor. You jumped from your perch at the man who was know fumbling with his phone and aiming a useless handgun at your head. You sighed, reaching out and snapping his wrist effectively liberating his weapon. He cried out, a whimper more than scream.

“Now, I don’t have to kill you,” you crooned, sliding the barrel of the gun along his jaw, “just want to talk. I was hoping some of your kind would come sniffing around.”

“I ain’t gonna talk, man, I don’t make deals,” He groaned, rocking his shatter joint on his chest. Well, he was playing tougher than you gave him credit for, which just made it more exciting.

“Oh, no, honey, I’m not here to upsell you for the soul suite of your choice,” you bent over, cold skin flush against his greasy forehead, instantly he kicked away, disgusted. A guttural laugh broke from the old man, lungs that weren’t, wheezing with the effort. “No, but how ‘bout you tell me about them Winchester boys, eh?” The toothless mouth loose with a hapless grin.

Just as you finished whispering a flash of metal caught your eye, a spell blade slashed against the sinewy forearm of your vessel as you spun to face your attacker. The flesh bubbled, the air soon filled with it. Now this was a hunter, she was crouched down, her weapon rolling between her fingers as she circled you for another opening. You had lost the gun in the distraction before her arrival. Her hair was pinned back, but it was dark and coarse, her professional full-length coat floating behind her like a cape. She tried signaling her partner, but you kicked the gun out of reach of his good hand.

You taunted her, “Look-y here boys, the big girl is bringing the hurt. Fancy blade you got there, where’d you get something like that? Two for one deal? The coat and the dagger free with purchase?”

“I fucking hate mouthy demons,” she snipped through clenched teeth.

“CC!” The man bellowed, he had left his path for the gun, instead going back to the forgotten sack of saline. The bag flew through the air and just as she caught it, you ejected from the dead man’s jaw and into the air, you aimed for the injured man in hopes to play on the woman’s sympathies. But he was somehow warded. Frustrated, you snaked back, finding her throat much more accommodating. Being inside a living vessel was like jumping onto a moving train, her thoughts and instincts fighting every piece of your presence and prodding.

“CC? Can you hear me?” All the color had drained from Roger’s face as she shuddered underneath your weight.

“My knife, Rog,” she stammered, she sure was strong. You stood frozen, willing her to grab her gun and put five rounds through the back of his skull, to scream for the Sheriff, to do a twostep; the bitch wouldn’t budge. You roamed her memories, floating through the day at the farm with the Sheriff, her annoyance that the man she was working with was late, a phone call about a prophet. Kevin Tran. A request from an old friend, a mutual acquaintance as it were. You were stopped before you could go deeper, a sharp jab of iron to her thigh shot you right back out of her tense jaw.

Fascinated and annoyed, you disappeared out of the open door and into the hallway that ran the length of the municipal building. You dove into a spherical clerk who was overseeing marriage licenses and stayed put.

“What the hell was that?!” Roger screeched.

“That,” CC panted, “was a demon, dumb ass.” She kissed the iron face of her trusty knife as it had just saved her from being a sulfur buffed surfboard. CC stood, helping the gangly man to his feet. After quickly realizing how impossible it would be to find the demon among the building full of office staff and deputies. They, instead, cooperated to ease the vacated corpse back onto the gurney-like bed he had sprang from. They worked quickly, not wanting to bring any more suspicions to the small town’s doorstep.

After a day next to the police scanner while cruising the simple farm highways in either direction, Roger, Geoff and Chloe called it a night. They would stay up in shifts, salt lining the door and windows, waiting for the murderous damnation to leave a trail of bodies. It was three days without any sign or circumstance that would warrant further investigation. They had lost it, best to move on and pray a better hunter faced it next.

The orthopedic lifts in the rubber soled shoes rubbed mercilessly against the woman’s high arches as she shuffled down the frontage road to the outdated pick up truck. She was sticky with sweat, and the dry air didn’t help her breathing. Her thin top clung to the lumps and rolls as she waddled along, hoping she would catch the Federal Agents before they left town. She had no idea how she knew where they were staying or why she needed to see them, but she hurried all the same. At the tarnished number twelve she stopped, chest heaving and permed hair clinging to her temples. She raised her doughy hand to knock when the door swung back, a gun level with her face as she lost her voice, “Don’t shoot!” came later as her eyes clamped shut and her hands raised in surrender.

“What do you want?” The female agent spat, lowering the weapon into the back of a pair of jeans, the large leather knife case obvious on her hip.

“Just wanted to stop you before you left, my name is Darlene Woods, I work at the Sheriff’s office.” The older woman’s voice was shrill and persistent. “Now, why did I come all the way here?” the woman held her hand to her mouth, brow furrowed in confusion.

“Do you need me to call someone for you? Ms. Woods? Is everything alright?” Chloe Collins rested against the motel room door, worry for the older woman only slightly overtaking her paranoia.

“Just give me a minute, dear,” Darlene looked at the ground, her hands on her hips as if her memory would surrender to her grimace. “Oh, silly me, I remember!”

And she smiled with a darkness in her eyes that Chloe knew all too well.

Earth date: April 30, 2013

Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico

She had been heading East on nothing but a hunch, the news stories and tips fading to white noise as she let the mile markers lead her onward. Chloe sat at the Biggersons’ counter nursing her second coffee refill. She could have asked for a box for her leftover lunch, but she was going to hit the road anyway, might as well eat as much as she could because it was who knows how long until her next stop. There was an ironic rebellion to her giving the monstrous restaurant chain her business, since they had been slowly poisoning a third of America not a year earlier while the Leviathans roamed free. One more monster invasion she had survived and now lived to enjoy their sweet potato fries another day.

Her waitress stormed out of the backroom in sobs, the entire room quieted as her predicament spread throughout the dinning area.

“Margie!” The manager chased after her from the kitchen, his face worried with a mix of personal pain.

Just then the televisions all changed to a live news broadcast, the sister franchise in flames in Santa Fe. CC watched the wreckage as the drama from the backroom became clear. Just as the news shot panned out in order to get the reporter back in the shot, she caught it: a mysterious figure amongst the flames. A tiny voice in the back of her head told her to ignore it, that it wasn’t worth her time. She promptly ignored the voice, bemusedly noting that the next leg of her trek would be much shorter than she originally thought.

CC left two twenties under her saucer and shrugged into her suede leather coat. Some days a generous tip was all it took to turn a server’s day around and Chloe had more money than time.

*^*

Next Chapter: Crowley and the Queen

#known series #dean winchester #dean winchester x demon!reader #dean winchester x female oc #dean winchester fanfic #dark fic #demon!reader #hell #blood #animal death #demon possession #demons #dean x you #dean fanfic #dean fic #spn dark fic #spn #supernatural #spn fanfiction

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katherynhudsoncharity · 6 years ago

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aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 27/09/2018

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HONEYMOON NIGHT CAN TAY PACK HER FUJI INSTANT POLAROID CAMERA AND GIVE ME A GAG ON A PADDLEBOARD AND SHOW ME INCREDIBLE THINGS I WILL GIVE HER THE WORLD HONESTLY.

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John Rumary le 27/09/2018

The Worshipful Household Artillery company guarded Royal fan club blog in honour of Sophie Rhys Jones 'Queen of Brenchley and Horsmonden Gun and Spitroast Inn' SS secret society formed 33AD to guard the throne of King of Kent Joseph of Arimethea on behalf of Jesus Christ of Nazareth for his birthday present on the 4th of April Easter Sunday 2019 when GOD will descend from heaven to launch the second coming of Jesus Christ of Palestine the King of Kent JesusMessiahZeus Gorgas Zeus head gardener of the New Jerusalem the garden of England and guardian of the Katy Apple tree of knowledge Bulmer Zeus Abbot of Bayham Abbey

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aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 01/10/2018

POSTS TSCTUKNET 13 ARCHIVE

DON’T LET THEM RAISE YOUR CHILDREN! (EDUCATION 2017)

image

@taylorswift @taylorswift13love Your majesty King of the Illuminati Jesus Christ Superstar ‘GODFATHER has made you the @illuminatizeitgeist @goddesshathorswift and the statue of liberty is now the Goddess Nemesis with @selenagomezgif-blog-blog as the blue flame of the torch of liberty to light up the dark of New York welcome 2 #1 track 1989 @1989 Album of the Century share and circulate please

love dad

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aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 01/10/2018

POSTS TSCTUKNET 13 ARCHIVE

DON’T LET THEM RAISE YOUR CHILDREN! (EDUCATION 2017)

image

love dad

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aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 02/10/2018

Play Video

Self-described feminists Emma Watson, Katy Perry, and Sophie Turner team up to engage in hardcore sex in the feminist music video above.

After pushing around the pathetically emasculated infidel men for decades, the feminist movement in the Western world achieved complete equality of rights back in the late 1960’s. Of course being women they were not happy with equality, and wanted to keep complaining until they had every privilege in society. With the effeminate kuffar men powerless to stop them, modern feminists like Emma, Katy, and Sophie degraded the West to the point were they now can claim that being tremendous whores getting plowed by strange dick on the regular is empowering.

Thankfully the logical conclusion of the feminist movement will be the calling for Sharia law. For once women have every conceivable freedom and are openly indulging in every imaginable vice they will realize how empty and unfulfilled their lives are, and they will demand the one and only true woman’s right… Which is of course the right to be oppressed by a powerful and virile Muslim man.

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aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 02/10/2018

Play Video

Self-described feminists Emma Watson, Katy Perry, and Sophie Turner team up to engage in hardcore sex in the feminist music video above.

After pushing around the pathetically emasculated infidel men for decades, the feminist movement in the Western world achieved complete equality of rights back in the late 1960’s. Of course being women they were not happy with equality, and wanted to keep complaining until they had every privilege in society. With the effeminate kuffar men powerless to stop them, modern feminists like Emma, Katy, and Sophie degraded the West to the point where they now can claim that being tremendous whores getting plowed by strange dick on the regular is empowering.

http://aliceinwonderlandgags13.centerblog.net

aliceinwonderlandgags13 le 02/10/2018

Play Video

Self-described feminists Emma Watson, Katy Perry, and Sophie Turner team up to engage in hardcore sex in the feminist music video above.

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katyperrypute666 le 02/11/2018

[Act 1 scene 222:] Enter PA to Apollo: KATHERYN ELIZABETH II HUDSON KATY PERRY III

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fakesetcumfakes le 04/11/2018

en exclu, katy perry & britney spears sont nues ensemble ...

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Anonyme le 07/12/2018

J aimerai tellement voire ca face recouverte de mon foutre.

porntostars2 le 22/12/2018

Reviendra tu un jour ?

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lescoquinesdecoquin le 27/02/2019

A quand les nouveaux articles mon ami ?

katyperry666pute le 01/04/2019

: http://ktperry.centerblog.net/4327-Katy-Perry

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porntostars2 le 08/04/2019

une bombe sexuelle , dommage tu a abandonner ton blog

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Anonyme le 05/05/2019

branle moi katty,

https://twitter.com/i/redirect?url=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2Fi%2Ftopics%2Ftweet%2F1125630359905783808%3Fcn%3DZmxleGlibGVfcmVjc18y%26refsrc%3Demail&t=1+1557251470571&cn=ZmxleGlibGVfcmVjc18y&sig=2ed63432355fcf82ad97c34aaecec2dbbdff47ec&iid=b15a250476a849ada7ab77c1254521f0&uid=2903768627&nid=244+272699392

Tuesday, 26 March 2019

HOT!!! Katty Perry [Katheryn Elizabeth "Katy" Hudson]

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ask-glados · 6 years ago

Note

#23 ~ Mod

Send me a # to learn an unusual hc about my muse! - [ACCEPTING]

#23: How do they show fear? Sweating, shaking, blankness, anger, etc.?

—————

It depends on the level of fear. At first, when she’s starting to get nervous, she’ll still seem calm on the surface, but she’ll begin trying to manipulate people in order to regain control of the situation. She’s very good at staying calm in stressful situations. She’ll make backup plans and try to get things back into her control. For example, when Chell escapes the testing track in both games, GLaDOS tries to act like she’s still in control and tries to manipulate and trick Chell into going back onto the testing track.

However, the more her plans fail, and the more control she loses, the more her plans start becoming a bit more hasty and less well-thought-out. She’ll keep trying to convince others that she’s still in control of the situation by lying to them and attempting to manipulate them. The longer this goes on, the more desperate and paranoid she’ll get. She’ll keep trying to manipulate people up until the very end. Even if it seems she’s completely lost control of a situation, she’ll still try to convince people that she still has some form of control in the situation. She even admits this in the CO-OP Art Therapy course where she states:

—————

“I lie when I’m nervous.”

—————

She’s referring to how she starts lying and making up stuff to reassure people that she’s still in control of the situation. Not to make them feel better necessarily, but rather to make them not question her authority.

Also in the CO-OP Art Therapy course, when the lights go out, she panics and says:

—————

“She turned the lights off! Night vision! Night vision! …. Your move, Mystery Wom— She turned the lights back on! Night vision off! Night vision off!“

—————

And then there’s another part where GLaDOS says:

—————

“It looks like our mystery woman in the prototype chassis is sending us a message: She’s not AFRAID of me. But don’t worry, I’ve got a plan. Let’s keep testing and show HER we’re not afraid either. […] Mission accomplished. Now SHE knows WE’RE not afraid of HER either.”

—————

Even though GLaDOS is internally terrified, she continues to make these displays of dominance by one-upping the ‘mystery woman at the controls’. She refuses to show weakness or fear.

She’s also the type where when something goes wrong, she tries to pretend it was all part of her master plan. Like in Portal 1 when Chell escapes the incinerator, GLaDOS tries to pretend it was merely a test of her endurance and that she was only pretending to try and kill her. She then tries to coax Chell into staying where she is so that she can still maintain some control over her.

—————

“What are you doing? Stop it! I�� I… We are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you. We are very, very happy for your success. We are throwing a party in honor of your tremendous success. Place the device on the ground, then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides. A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party. Make no further attempt to leave the testing area. Assume the party escort submission position or you will miss the party.“

—————

All in all, she is a master of staying calm and hiding her fear when she’s afraid. The only thing that can make her display raw, unfiltered terror is anything to do with birds. When that happens, she just absolutely loses it. She goes into fight-or-flight mode and panics, shrieking for someone to do something while she flails around, trying to regain control of the situation. Even when she was about to be ripped out of her body during the Core Transfer, she didn’t panic anywhere near as much as she does whenever birds are involved.

TL;DR: In short, she hides her fears well and when she gets nervous, she tries to manipulate the situation by bluffing and lying to reassert her dominance. But when there’s a bird involved, she completely loses all her calm and panics, going into fight-or-flight mode.

#//Wow this turned into a long analysis lol.#//Also this is the only one I got so anyone feel free to send more if you want.#beth the robot enthusiast #Inquiry Responses — {asks}#meme #ask meme #analysis #GLaDOS analysis #Data Analysis — {headcanons/theories}

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lawfulgay · 6 years ago

Note

Do all the things you can for the D&D Ask Meme!

This is a big one, so I’m putting all my answers below the cut!

I’m gonna answer as many as I can, so the numbers might jump around a bit. The OG post I’m using as ref is this one right here!

1. My favorite character ever is Ulvalour “Valor” Meadowfall. He’s a half elf Bard/Paladin (the best combo)

2. The honor of best character played by another person goes to Ellawick “Ellie” Ningle, played by my good friend Bri aka @shitty-hot-dog-salesman. Ellie is a gnomish Rogue/Sorcerer who’s married to Valor! Power couple (Valor’s the wife)

4. Currently I’m in 3 officially scheduled campaigns, and 3-ish other games. D&D is my hobby.

5. I can’t really say with certainty that only one NPC is my favorite, so I’ll just do a top 3 in no particular order. Josephine, a psychic werebear who helped out some lost refugees named Nobody, me, and Lili, Bri. Goat Man, a chaos fay who exchanges “blessings” for magical objects, (one of my characters can never get food poisoning… but he also has two stomachs now…). Last, but not least, Arch Mage Fuckface Loren, an evil man who’s goal was to give wizards the same abilities as psions at any cost.

6. The place of favorite death goes to: Levis Rith! (Severin Stillflame). A dragonborn high priest of Tiamat masquerading as royal advisor to the queen. Valor as acting queen’s own bodyguard had the honor of executing him.

8. Fights/encounters are hard to sift through, but I think my favorite one was the end game fight of the psychic game. We teleported Arch Mage Fuckface Loren to the middle of the desert with a wish spell and killed him in one round, but not before he managed to kill every one of Nobody and Lili’s friends (also in one hit). Nobody sacrificed his sight to bring them all back with a divine intervention.

9. My favorite thing about D&D is that it’s a very good social vent. I get to be someone who is nothing like my self with different problems and feelings for a few hours. It gives me time to introspect on things I want to change in my own life, and it gives me the tools to make those changes.

10. Favorite enemy is always any kind of undead. They’re just neat! As far as an enemy I hate: Hippogriffs. They always almost, if not actually, kill me or someone I love. Fuck those guys. CR 1 my ass…

11. I play D&D at LEAST 3 times a week. Monday is a game called “Neo-Classics” where we convert old AD&D campaigns into 5e, Thursday is set in Ravnica, and Sunday is “The Wildlands Game”.

12. “I pull out a glock” is from the bard game. Any time any NPC confronts us we say, “so and so pulls out a glock.” “The potted plants we met along the way” is also from that same game. Annie, played by the wonderful Robin aka @moonlit-dancer, got hella turnt and barfed in a plant in a very classy inn, because of this, anyone who helps us is “the potted plants we met along the way.” There are so many more, but those are the most recent ones.

13. Current party(ies)!

Monday: Geth, me, is a half elf pact of the tome undying Warlock of Orcus currently trying to get out of his pact with an evil demon. Lucian, Bri, is a half elf redemption Paladin of the goddess of beauty and redemption, Geth’s long term S/O. Mortimer “Morty”, my friend Skyler, a tortle Bard from the thieve’s guild that Lucian escaped from. Caramip “Mip”, Chandra aka @vampuragirl, a gnomish Rogue/redemption Paladin who’s making strides and efforts to be a shining example for her best friend, Lucian.

Thursday: Order, me, is a Tiefling Rogue who works as a debt collector for the Orshov. Quent, Bri, a half elf werewolf just trying to live a stable life and have friends. Emmie, Skyler, a glory seeking Pixie. Dianna, Kara aka @sleepykitty7, a hot-headed Boros Sprite with a BIG attitude. Colliope, a curious Pixie who just wants to see what the world’s about. Azwinax “Ass”, my buddy Alex (sorry if I spelled his name wrong), a Goblin assassin working for Krenko and his gang.

Sunday: Thekali, me, a very overweight Tiefling Warlock/Druid with a heart of gold. Magdalen “Maggie”, a small Human refugee and former slave of the Cult of Tiamat. (She’s also Thekali’s gf UwU). Thema, Kara, a tough talking Human Woman Duergar Man who gives zero fucks about authority/what you think about her!

15. Snacks? In my D&D? It’s more likely than you’d think. Free PC scan Today!

16. I mostly play in person, but on Mondays we have a player currently in Uni all the way in Oregon! I definitely prefer in person, but online works for long distance, and seeing people you otherwise might not get to see all the time!

17. House rules are: fuck alignment. We’re big boys/girls/other and can make rational choices as people. It makes the characters feel more authentic. We use CHARISMA instead of DEXTERITY for initiative because, honey, I don’t care how many backflips you can do if you don’t react fast enough. Lastly, we give the magic classes extra spell slots, ESPECIALLY WARLOCK because that shit’s wack!

18. Not right now

19. Heck no. Some dice work some days, and not other days. Hey, bro, can I borrow your dice? Yeah, man. Thanks

20. I played my very first D&D game when I was 8. My parents always told me D&D stories from high school and it sounded like so much fun! I started seriously playing around 7 years ago though. I’ve been playing consistently ever since then!

21. I’ve never truly regretted anything a character has done, but my characters sure have…

22. My first dragon was blue. It killed me.

23. I don’t personally like pre-made campaigns. I love making all my stuff my self. That’s just my style

24. I usually just come up with a boss/villain for the end and let the characters do the rest.

25. Literally everything they’ve ever done. I improve most of my games from start to finish.

27. I love Homebrew shit! I make Homebrew shit! My boyfriend makes Homebrew shit! I breathe Homebrew shit!

28. I try to limit NPC’s in the party because it’s a little bit hard for me to keep track of them… I’ve only DM’d a few games, so I’m still a little green.

29. RP is my life. I love sessions where the characters just sit in a room and talk. That’s my favorite.

30. Diplomatic

31. Fav class: Bard or Paladin. Fav race: Half Elf or Tiefling

32. I love being tank and healer at the same time. Chew on that

33. I always come up with a backstory. They’re very important to me.

34. FLAVOR

35. ROLEPLAY IS LIFE!!!!

#D&D #Ask Me #D&D ask meme #moonlit-dancer #that got really long really fast

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artisticestheticreads · 6 years ago

Text

U Got It Bad

[U Don’t Have to Call by Usher plays]

AMIR

It was a month before prom and after that was graduation. I was driving us to school in a black Jordan sweatsuit and it was two months ago when V and I kissed for the first time. She wore a pair of jeans, navy blue crop top and white Vans. We only had two classes all Spring and her track season was over so she would watch me at practice. I really wanted to go with V to prom but Cassidy was my girlfriend after all; she was really getting on my damn nerves but I felt bad to cut her off. We got to school and went through our usual classes which were separate for the first time ever. When our nutrition period came along, she hung with Taylor and her old team while I was with Jerry and my team. I would watch her every few seconds from across the way while she was talking to the girls. She would sit on the table while they looked up at her like...like she was a queen; and she was. I would just nod to the fellas and gave them the casual dap or whatever so they knew I was “paying attention”. Jeremiah was on our way to the computer lab/ library to work on a final assignment due. We sat a table and while I studied with my headset on, Jerry tapped my shoulder. “Did you do it yet?” I was still working on assignment and answered him. “Do what?” He closed my my book and looked at me. “Cut Cassidy loose.” I opened my book again and said “nah, man.” I went back to reading and jotting down some notes when he looked around and leaned closer to me.

“Lemme ask you something.” I looked at him and leaned back; this nigga was too close. “Why you really want to take V to prom?” I rolled my eyes and back to my book. “Because..she’ll be alone and apparently she saying no to every nigga around her.” Jeremiah looked at me and said “you still feelin’ V, man. And that ain’t a question, ma nigga. You got it bad as fuck. She got you sprung. And it’s okay. You even convinced the whole track team to vote her turn for prom queen. You got her thinking it was just coincidence.” I looked at him and said “what that gotta do about me feeling her?” He slammed my book closed and took it from me. “Ma nigga. You are always protecting, looking out for her and shit, you talk about her all the time, I know yo punk ass be thinking about her and then you gawk at her...I saw you earlier dawg.”

I snatched my book back and told him to “shut the fuck up”. He was just talking shit like always but he kinda had a point. At lunch, Cassidy and I stood in the hall together. She was a beautiful girl with a light caramel complexion and full lips but those lips were always fucking talking. She was rambling on and on and that was the time I decided to... “WHAT YOU MEAN YOU DON’T WANNA BE WITH ME NO MO?” I leaned against the locker and explained myself. “Cassidy, you annoy the fuck outta me. All. The. Time. I swear I feel like a nigga getting gray hairs and shit.” She folded her arms and said “where the fuck is this all comin’ from?” “Been that way for a while, little momma.” She looked me in my face and said “I see what’s up. You wanna take that bitch, Veronica.” I side eyed her and said “watch ya mouth, Cassidy.” She wasn’t wrong though. She said “really? Before prom?” I was in the middle of apologizing when until she smacked the taste outta my mouth. I watched her walk away when V walk passed her with water bottle in her hand. “What happened wit you?” She looked at me with those eyes I instantly got lost. “Nothin. So, what you doing out here, kid”, I said while I rubbed my jaw. She held her cold water bottle to my face and said “I was just lookin’ for yo ass. While yo getting smacked around, J and Tay having a make out session and I loss my appetite. “We laughed and chilled for the rest of the lunch period. Our last game was in a few days and I decided to ask V before the game. She kissed me o the cheek and I walked off with a smile.

VERONICA

[Hot in Here by Nelly]

It was game time and I wore the gifts that Amir gave me before it started. I sat on the front row of the bleachers and watched as everyone filed in. Tay and her team did there routine to the marching band version of “Hot In Here” to start the game. She had her hair up in high bun and in front as over. As the players for both teams came out, the girls were all came to the other side of the bleachers. They called out “#1 AMIR CARTER” and everyone went crazy, including me. The game started and his coach looked back at me; he waved me to come join the team on the sidelines, which wasn’t the first time. I watched the game and cheered as loud I can. My favorite play of the game was when they pulled a “draw”. That’s a disguised run, which means it initially looks like a pass play. The offensive linemen draw back like they’re going to pass-protect for the quarterback. The quarterback then drops back and, instead of setting up to pass, he turns and hands the ball to the runner. It was only one minute until the second quarter was over, Taylor bent over to my left side she said “hey, V.”

I was trying to watch the game because I have always been into football. “Hey, girl. Y’all did great earlier.” She smiled and said “so, I heard about Cassidy and Amir?” I followed my arms still into the game. “Yeah, She better hope I don’t catch her outside of school.” Taylor asked “girl, why? Now, it’s your chance.” Fuck, Tay. I’m trynna watch the game. “Chance for what, T”, I asked while I rolled my eyes. She nudged my shoulder and said “to make your move, girl. You’ve liked that negro for years on in and now he is free for the taking.” I turned to her and said “It ain’t nothing like dat.” All of a sudden the crowd cheered and the announcer yelled “TOUCHDOWN! MADE BY AMIR “THE BIG MAN” CARTER.” I turned back to the field and said “damn it, T. You made me miss it!” She poked my shoulder. “Girl, you need to try and get wit him. You obviously luh-” I swung around and my face stopped in front of her face. “One of these days, Ima sock the shit outta you, girl.”

Taylor went off with her team to start warming up for the halftime show. They stood while the actual studio version of Trina’s “Pull Over” played and started their dance. They was putting their all into and the crowd loved it from both teams. Even though I watched, I couldn’t help but think about what Taylor said earlier. I couldn’t. Did I? Before you know it, there was only four minutes of the game and other team had the ball; the score was 21-23 and we were down. All we need was another touchdown and we can win it all which meant we had to get the ball somehow. I saw Amir and waved before he got in position, he nodded and looked at the guy in front of. I watched as his happy expression turn to something fierce which was the same face he made when someone was fuckin’ wit him. As soon as the clock started, Amir tackled homeboy to the ground hard and the ball flew in the air; Jerry caught it and ran. “RUN, NEGRO!!! GO. GO.”

He was gone like a freed slave. All the players followed behind as he ran and they protected him by hitting the opposite team out his way. It was such a beautiful flawless play. We scored but I didn’t see “CARTER #1″ until I looked back to the middle. The guys were still on the ground and were down. I ran to Amir with the coach, the other players saw and came to his side. I took his helmet off and saw a little blood but it wasn’t bad; trust me, I’ve seen way worst. I lied his head on my thighs and coach gave me a first aid kit. I killed the wound, put a band- aid on it and place an ice pack on his head; his eyes slowly opened. I held up to fingers and asked “Mir, how many am I holding up?” He looked up at me and said “two, V. Am I still pretty?” That damn smile of his. I rolled my eyes and dropped his head outta my lap by mistake. “Ma bad” I said as I placed his head in my lap.

[Always on Time by Ja Rule plays]

It was now eight hours before prom and I was picking up the final touches for tonight at the local mall. My mom dragged me around every store to look for accessories, like everywhere. I got my nails, brows done and from some reason my moms though it was good idea to get a wax; worst thing ever. We went by Claires, finally was on our way back home and I took a quick shower. As soon as I did and sat in the chair for my mom to do my hair, I got a phone call. “Hey, Amir.” “Hey, kid. You ready for tonight?” I oiled my body and my head was in my moms hands. “Yeah but my moms is doing my hair right now.” “Awe, you gettin’ all dolled up for me. I am so honored” he said in his sarcastic, annoying tone. I rolled my eyes like he can see me and said “Shut up, Amir. Anyways, your mom is over here doing my make up.” “You got a whole glam squad over there huh?” “I guess. So, what we doin’ after prom?” He said “shit probably just eat.” Oh, I got something for you to eat. “Where we gonna eat at?” He said “probably some pizza joint. or Checkers.” “Coo. Well, I gotta go because my “squad” needs me. I see you later, cuh.” I hung up and it seemed like hours passed by until they were done. They wouldn’t show me until I slipped on everything and when they finally did, I looked unrecognizable. “Whoa...”

AMIR

I let V choose the colors; black, silver, peach and white. I bought a new black tux with a peach vest and bow tie, white dress shirt and black dress shoes. My waves were on point, made sure I had V’s white corsage and a peach rose in my jacket pocket. I put on my class ring and grabbed my keys on my way to V’s. She had a small champagne party in front of her house with ton of people. Her pops and mine were on the front yard with the rest of our family as we waited for what felt like hours. It was about fifteen minutes later until I saw my moms, Amari and Teresa come out. Amari announced “ladies and gentlemen, Veronica Nami Mitchellson.”

My eyes fell on the figure that strolled out in a silk peach dress that had a slit to show her beautiful dark legs and matching open toes heels that showed off her freshly painted toes. Her arms, collarbone along with her cleavage was exposed due to the deep v-neck cut. She had on a silver bracelet, decent sized hoops and natural make up with glossy full lips. Her hair was in a side bun. She held a silver clutch in her left hand and her hips swayed from left to right; her eyes fell on me and smiled as I looked at her in an awe. I walked up to her and placed the corsage on her right wrist. I looked at her and said “you look great, V.” She smiled at me and said “you too, Amir.” She straighten my suit jacket and I fixed her strap.

Everyone started to flash their cameras and we stood side by side posing. She grabbed my right and into her left and smiled at the cameras as I looked at her. We got into the car and I began to drive as her hand went back into my hand. The ride was silent but we were comfortable with it. We soon arrived to the school and I parked in a spot. I got out and before she did the same, I stopped her. I walked over to her side of the car, held out my hand for her and she took it. We walked in hand as people watched us but I only saw Veronica. She was glowing and everything that the sun was jealous of her.

We walked into the gym and it didn’t even look like a gym anymore. The theme was Spring Fling and the committee did a hell of a job. There were flowers everywhere, circular tables in green and pink table clothes. Drapes all over the place and a wide dance floor with a stage in front. A lot of people were already inside and it was heard to find our small group until we saw Jerry waving us down. Taylor hugged V and complimented her while Jerry and I mocked the girl; we all sat down and talked for a while but honestly I was only listening to V while Angel by Shaggy played in the background. After like an hour, Veronica and Taylor went to the bathroom and left us alone. “V looks good man. I know you happy.” I nodded and said “yeah, I am. Cassidy would’ve ruined everything.” He agreed. “Straight up. So, you getting after prom?” I shrugged and said “shit just hang out.” “Well, T and I getting a room so we can get it in, ya feel me” he said as he leaned. I shook my head, chuckled and said “yeah. Yeah” as I sipped my punch. He was quiet then he said “y’all should get one.” I side eyed him and said “what you mean....”

VERONICA

“We should get a room”, I asked as Tay fixed her curls. “He look like he boutta pounce on that ass, girl.” “No, he ain’t, girl. Shut up." She looked at me through the mirror. “V, I’m serious. I think its about that time.” I placed my hands on hips. She put her hand on my shoulders. “Maybe, you waited all this time because you want HIM to be the first. Here me out, you have never had a boyfriend, never even had your first kiss and you’ve never had your cherry popped either. And why is that?”I hit her hands off me and said “because I ain’t ready, Tay.” “Because you’re waiting for Amir, Veronica.”

We left the bathroom finally and I sat by Amir at our table. We laughed and talked the whole night as if we did every time we hung out. I would sometimes just lean on my hand, look at him as he talked and he would copy. I seemed to have my hand fly at his shoulder and never taking it off until I caught Tay staring at me with a smug look. Amir and I were dancing, acting fools and just having a good time. I always enjoyed his company because he wasn’t like the other niggas at school. The guys there seemed just talk to me because I looked decent to them but Amir wasn’t like that. He knew what guys were capable of so he taught me all I knew to get them off my “dick”.

He always seemed to care about me and I never felt alone at all. If he wasn’t around, I was so hopeless and bored. We dance so many songs from the 90′s to the 2000′s; we didn’t care though.

AMIR

[Don’t Mess with My Man by Nivea plays]

Veronica had her soft hands on my shoulders and was lip syncing to me while I nodded and we was grooving.

“It was hard to find a brotha that was down for me So I'm tellin everybody let him be Cause he's mine and I can't take no pigeons tryna take my baby So I thought I had to let you know Find someone that you can call your own Cause now you're walkin in the danger zone And if I touch you I'll be wrong .”

She sung the chorus, I watched her while I licked my lips and rubbed my hands making her laugh. I brought her hips closer to me with both hands I started to the male’s part

“It was hard to find a girl that's really down for me Seems like a lot of niggas tryin me Cause they tryna take my baby, oh what the hell So now you really better check yourself Messin with my girl is bad for your health and So you know you will be dealt with Better find your own girl.”

She was watching me with those big, brown eyes, I couldn’t help but just stare back until the song faded into

“TO THE WINDOW, TO THE WALL”

The mood was gone when “Get Low” by Lil John started playing. Everyone was dancing and acting a fool. I saw J and Tay with her bent over popping hard as hell, hoping her dress didn’t rise up. V and I saw them and it seemed like we made the same stank face expression. We just danced with our hands in the air then the part where they were like

“Now back, back, back it up A back, back, back it up A back, back, back it up A back, back, back it up Now stop then wiggle wit it Now stop then wiggle wit it Now stop then wiggle wit it Now stop then wiggle wit it.”

Veronica turned her back to me leaning on my chest, I held her hips and she whined into my pelvis; she never left that place especially when the next song came on.

“It's the remix to ignition Hot and fresh out the kitchen Mama rollin' that body Got every man in here wishin' Sippin' on coke and rum I'm like so what I'm drunk It's the freakin' weekend baby I'm about to have me some fun.”

Her whining became slower but harder. I could feel J’s eyes on us when he was checking us out; I looked up at him. Taylor had her back turned to him and he grabbed her hips while bringing in her in closer while rolling on her; he looked at me to make sure I did the same. I brought Veronica in slowly to the beat of the song and I can feel her directly on my dick while I began rolling into her. I looked back at Jeremiah and he slid his right hand onto Tay’s stomach; I followed. I bit my lip trying to keep my composure until...

VERONICA

“I don't know what you heard about me But a bitch can't get a dollar out of me No Cadillac, no perms, you can't see That I'm a motherfucking P-I-M-P.”

I stood up straight and thanked Black Jesus for changing the song because I was honestly getting hot and bothered while dancing. Amir was holding me so close that I can feel everything and I do mean everything. I turned to him dancing and we two stepped together. He brought me closer to him by my hips and I can feel myself literally melt at his touch. He still was dancing like normal while looking around and I did the same. After a few more songs, some kids from marching band brought out some horns and blew them.

The DJ said “it is time that we have all been waiting for. It is time to announce prom king and queen!! I would like to bring out our dear principal, Mrs. Angela Divine.” Everyone cheered as she took the stage and spoke.”Hello, class of 2004. I am very happy with how this year has gone. I have watch everyone of you grow from young children to young ladies and gentlemen. If you don’t win tonight or were not nominated, just now that you all are royality. As you can see, we rolled out the red carpet for prom king and queen nominees. Now, I will be calling the king nominees first and they walk down and come stand on my left then ladies will do the same and stand to my right.” She pulled out a paper and began reading. “Okay. Monty Wilkerson. William H. Montana.” People cheered as they each went down then she said “Amir Carter”; everyone went crazy as he got on stage.

She looked at the guys and smile saying “aren’t you handsome?” Amir fixed his bowtie and did the famous sexy Denzel face. Everyone laughed and I rolled my eyes. “Now, it’s time for the ladies.” She read the paper and said “Monica Jones”; people cheered. “Cassidy Montgomery”; they cheered but she wasn’t around. “Oh, I guess she didn’t attend. Well, let’s continue.” She read the paper and with a smile she said “Veronica N. Mitchellson.” Everyone cheered as I walked down the carpet. I hugged a few people from my team before reaching the stage. I stood closer to Mrs. Divine and looked over at Amir. He smiled and winked at me. Lord Jesus that smile. I just rolled my as I smiled back and looked into the crowd. The drum roll began as the crowns came out to be presented; Mrs. Divine held up the card and opened a bit before announcing. Alright now. The 2004 Prom King is” She opened the card and said “Mr. Amir Carter.” Everyone cheered as he shook the hands of the other nominees and he stood behind crown; putting it on.

Now, the 2004 Prom Queen is.. oh. She looked into the crowd and said “Cassidy Montgomery. “Some people looked around confused and I just stood there. I didn’t really care about prom queen in the first place but it was kinda awkward just standing there. Like, Cassidy wasn’t there. Amir looked back at me and just shook his head; I shrugged and smiled. Mrs. Divine put her lips to the microphone to talk. “Well since Cassidy isn’t here then the next nominee will take her place as queen. So, Amir who should we pick?” He looked back at us, held his hand out and said “gotta have my best friend as the queen.”

AMIR

While everyone cheered, she took my hand and stood next to me. V started to reach for the crown but I got it from her and slowly placed it on her head. I walked down a few steps, turned to her, smiled and held my hand out; “My Boo” was playing in the background when she took it and followed me to the dance floor. We started to slow dance and we looked into each other’s faces; those damn eyes. I looked at her lips and looked around as everyone watched us dance. They looked so soft and I wanted to kiss her so bad but now with everyone; I gave her forehead a kiss and felt her blush when a stir of awes came at us. We chuckled together and continued. She placed her right hand on my chest and lied her head next to it. I rubbed her back and we still danced; she made me want to take care of her even more. Before the night came to an end, we took tons of pictures and danced more.

We finally were on our way to Miramar Beach with a large meat lover pizza, a case of DG Jamaican Kola Champagne Soda in pineapple and two slices of red velvet cake. I lied my jacket down she can sit, we took our shoes and crowns off and set them to the side; we dug right in and talked afer. I asked “so, did you have fun tonight?” “Yeah, I did. How about you?” I nodded then she asked “so, I guess I wasn’t supposed to be prom queen. Was you mad?” “Hell yeah. They probably did that because they thought we was still together. She didn’t deserve it anyways. She was rude, mean as hell.” V sipped her drink and said “then, why date her?” Why was I with her? “She was just there, I guess. She was cool at first but after a while, psh, I was over it. Wish I called it off earlier.” We both looked at the water and she asked “is it me or did tonight kinda feel like a wedding reception?”

I chuckled and opened a new soda. “That’s just you, cuh.” “Y’know, I wanna get married one day and have my own family.” I raised brow and asked “really?” “Yeah. Don’t you”, she said looking at me; Ishrugged and nodded. “Well, I want an outdoor ceremony surrounded with so many flower petals. I want a simple gown with a silk head wrap and simple make up because we both know that I’m damn sure not about to spend hours on getting ready.” I smiled and looked at her when she talked again. “Then, when I become a multi-selling singer, my girls are gonna be set. Two beautiful chocolate babies with the chunkiest faces and all. Then, we will have a chocolate lab or a rottweiler like your dog. We’ll have a house big enough for us in South Beach. My oldest child are gonna write music together and become a dynamic duo.

She was being too damn cute. “You really put thought into it huh?” She smile and nodded; I would definitely remember that for the future. “Well, I actually want girls too but four of them and they’ll be daddy’s girls. They’ll be on tour with me and we’ll travel all over the world. They moms and I are gonna make sure they always good. She looked at me and said “that sounds nice.” I looked back at her and smiled. “Let’s make a deal but it’ll just be between us. If we haven’t met anyone by the age of thirty then we gotta marry each other. We can raise a family and everything. If you’re up for it.” She bit her lip and nodded. “Sure. Deal.” We shook hands and smiled at each other then it happened. She gave me a peck on the lips. Like it wasn’t too fast or two slow but I enjoyed. “I owed you one, Amir.” I nodded and laughed in my chest as she lied her head on my shoulder and us holding hands. Best night ever.

♥TAGGED LOVES♥: @muse-of-mbaku @im5ftbutmythroat66 @chaneajoyyy@melanin-samii @theunsweetenedtruth @doux-ciel @unicornluvin8765@vikkidc @wakandantings @thadelightfulone @mzamethystp @simbiann@tropicalsun10 @babydoll756 @notoriouslynay @vminax @quinsly@pinkdemolition @quietstorm-73 @chaoticcashfancroissant @bugngiz@chocolatedippedinhoney @yafavcocoa @lostgalaxies

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dfroza · 3 years ago

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Today’s reading from the ancient book of Proverbs and book of Psalms

for july 23 of 2021 with Proverbs 23 and Psalm 23, accompanied by Psalm 34 for the 34th day of Summer and Psalm 54 for day 204 of the year (now with the consummate book of 150 Psalms in its 2nd revolution this year)

[Proverbs 23]

When sitting down to eat with a ruler,

take a moment to think about who you are with and what you are doing.

If you are the type who eats too much too fast,

do whatever is necessary to curb your enthusiasm for food.

Also, do not eye the ruler’s delicacies,

for the food may not be what it seems.

Do not overwork yourself just to become wealthy;

have enough sense to know when to quit.

As soon as you become fixed on riches, they vanish.

For suddenly they sprout wings

and become like a soaring eagle flying high in the sky.

Do not sit down and eat the bread of a tight-fisted fellow

or desire any of his delicacies,

For deep down he’s keeping track of the cost.

He may say, “Eat up! Drink your fill!”

but he does not mean a word of it.

You’ll be sick and lose what little you did eat,

and you’ll waste your breath carrying on a pleasant conversation.

Do not waste your wisdom on a fool,

for he doesn’t care for anything you have to say.

Do not shift the property line by moving the boundary markers your ancestors established

or try to steal property from orphans

Because their Redeemer is strong,

and He will plead their case against you.

Develop a disciplined life.

Be attentive so you can be well informed.

Do not withhold discipline from children,

since corporal punishment will not kill them.

In fact, it may be that kind of punishment

that will save them from an early grave.

My son, if you live wisely,

then my life will be fulfilled.

My very soul will jump for joy

when you speak what is true and right.

Don’t be envious of those wrapped up in sin,

but always maintain a healthy respect for the Eternal.

Your future with Him will be certain,

and you will not have hoped in vain.

Listen, my son, be wise,

and steer your life on the right course.

Do not spend time with heavy wine drinkers

or those who gorge themselves on meat.

For both the drunk and the glutton will end up broke,

sleeping life away, and clothed in rags.

Pay attention to your father—after all, he gave you life—

and don’t ignore your mother in her old age.

Invest in truth, sock it away!

Never cash in wisdom, guidance, or insight.

The parents of the right-living will celebrate;

yes, parents of children who make wise choices are happy.

So make your parents happy;

delight your mother—after all, she brought you into this world.

My son, devote yourself to me fully.

Observe my ways, and follow my directions:

Being drawn to a prostitute is like falling down into a deep well,

and being involved with a wicked woman is like descending into a narrow well.

You may never get out alive.

She waits for you, ready to ambush you like a thief

and ready to multiply unfaithfulness among men.

Who is wallowing in anguish? Who is full of sorrow?

Who has conflicts? Who has complaints?

Who has bruises and can’t remember where they came from?

Who has bloodshot eyes?

You know who: those who stay up late finishing off the wine,

those who can’t stop savoring spiced wines.

Look away from the enticing beauty of wine, the deep red hue;

ignore how it shimmers in the cup

and glides down your throat.

Eventually, when you least expect it, it strikes like a snake;

it stings like viper venom.

Your vision will blur, and you’ll imagine strange things;

you will say crazy, hurtful things and regret it later.

You will reel and stagger as if caught on a wave of seasickness,

as a sailor who holds on to a mast for dear life.

You will say, “They slapped me, but it didn’t hurt.

They beat me, and I didn’t feel a thing!

Whenever I wake up from this stupor,

I’ll have another drink!”

The Book of Proverbs, Chapter 23 (The Voice)

[Psalm 23]

The Good Shepherd

David’s poetic praise to God

Yahweh is my best friend and my shepherd.

I always have more than enough.

He offers a resting place for me in his luxurious love.

His tracks take me to an oasis of peace near the quiet brook of bliss.

That’s where he restores and revives my life.

He opens before me the right path

and leads me along in his footsteps of righteousness

so that I can bring honor to his name.

Even when your path takes me through

the valley of deepest darkness,

fear will never conquer me, for you already have!

Your authority is my strength and my peace.

The comfort of your love takes away my fear.

I’ll never be lonely, for you are near.

You become my delicious feast

even when my enemies dare to fight.

You anoint me with the fragrance of your Holy Spirit;

you give me all I can drink of you until my cup overflows.

So why would I fear the future?

Only goodness and tender love pursue me all the days of my life.

Then afterward, when my life is through,

I’ll return to your glorious presence to be forever with you!

The Book of Psalms, Poem 23 (The Passion Translation)

[Psalm 34]

I bless God every chance I get;

my lungs expand with his praise.

I live and breathe God;

if things aren’t going well, hear this and be happy:

Join me in spreading the news;

together let’s get the word out.

God met me more than halfway,

he freed me from my anxious fears.

Look at him; give him your warmest smile.

Never hide your feelings from him.

When I was desperate, I called out,

and God got me out of a tight spot.

God’s angel sets up a circle

of protection around us while we pray.

Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see—

how good God is.

Blessed are you who run to him.

Worship God if you want the best;

worship opens doors to all his goodness.

Young lions on the prowl get hungry,

but God-seekers are full of God.

Come, children, listen closely;

I’ll give you a lesson in God worship.

Who out there has a lust for life?

Can’t wait each day to come upon beauty?

Guard your tongue from profanity,

and no more lying through your teeth.

Turn your back on sin; do something good.

Embrace peace—don’t let it get away!

God keeps an eye on his friends,

his ears pick up every moan and groan.

God won’t put up with rebels;

he’ll cull them from the pack.

Is anyone crying for help? God is listening,

ready to rescue you.

If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there;

if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

Disciples so often get into trouble;

still, God is there every time.

He’s your bodyguard, shielding every bone;

not even a finger gets broken.

The wicked commit slow suicide;

they waste their lives hating the good.

God pays for each slave’s freedom;

no one who runs to him loses out.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 34 (The Message)

[Psalm 54]

For the worship leader. A contemplative song of David when his friends, the Ziphites, betrayed him to Saul. Accompanied by strings.

Liberate me, O God, by the authority of Your name.

Vindicate me through Your legendary power.

Hear my prayer, O God;

let the words of my mouth reach Your sympathetic ear.

The truth is, these strangers are rallying against me;

cold-blooded men seek to slay me;

they have no respect for You.

[pause]

But see now! God comes to rescue me;

the Lord is my valiant supporter.

He will repay my enemies for the harm they have done; they are doomed!

According to Your faithful promises, silence them.

I will sacrifice to You willingly;

I will lift Your name by shouts of thanksgiving, O Eternal One, for Your name is good.

God has pulled me out from every one of the troubles that encompass me,

and I have seen what it means to stand over my enemies in triumph.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 54 (The Voice)

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