#100% would read
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palfriendpatine66 · 4 months ago
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@sky-kenobye nailed it
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I will now be referring to cover letters as self insert fanfiction
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ratunderneathahat · 24 days ago
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"that's not dark romance that's just glorified abuse" what the hell do you think dark romance is then? Cuddling with the lights turned off? It tells you it will have dark themes in the fucking name. Yes it should be properly given an age rating in plain sight but other than that it's not actually hurting anyone. It's fucking fiction. "Well it's not romantic" They're in a romantic relationship. Even if it's an unhealthy one. Or a sexual relationship, but so far "dark sex" is not a trope.
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majunju · 8 months ago
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"girlfriend" (more ab rielle here)
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icelogged · 6 months ago
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aceredshirt13 · 11 months ago
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if there's one thing about classic literary detectives it's that they are not conventionally attractive. doyle told sidney paget to stop drawing holmes so pretty. christie was like "let me introduce you to this short pudgy balding man who is retirement age and i hate him." sayers compares wimsey to maggots on literally the FIRST PAGE
i love it. i love them. stop casting hot people in these roles. we need our detectives to be Charmingly Weird-Looking
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vaxxman · 7 months ago
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Could I request Medic having The Mom Grip on Scout’s shoulder after the speedy moron almost let a mercenary secret slip while they weee getting groceries?
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Three Europeans and two Americans walk into a grocery store in New Mexico.
I hope this is the right meme.
More silliness below.
This comic is the antithesis of the "wtf is a kilometre" joke.
The faces they make when they can't quite identify the type of brown bread in the bread aisle.
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You don't know how [insert nationality here] you are until you go overseas and things are different.
Spy obviously has no problems with pretending to know how much a gallon of milk is, he just peeks into his conversion chart notes, pretending it's his shopping list.
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I want to think Heavy is completely fine with having to readjust to a new unit system, he just eyeballs most practical things anyways by holding them up and mumbling about how they approximately weigh like a chicken or his kettle bell etc. He's always been living in practical ignorant bliss.
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Medic has a peer reviewed meltdown the first time he realises there's no uniformity in "a cup of ____" because every object has different densities. He's diligent about memorising the conversion rates for ounces, pounds, the most common things etc., and recovers ok. He goes through the same stages of grief rage when he finds out about distances and lengths.
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Just remember four inches are 10.16 cm and pray no one asks you to specify anything bigger than inches.
Everyone does a mental victory lap when they manage to guess how much Celsius the weather is because they keep forgetting it's Celsius*5/9+32=Fahrenheit, Engineer reminds them patiently.
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The true victories are the correct temperature guesses we've made along the way.
One time, a friend asked me if I actually knew how much a tablespoon of flour was in gramms to convince me that metric users also make use of volume based units without thinking about them. But little did she know a heaped spoonful of 405 flour is about 15g and a level tablespoon is 10g.
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They claim Oolong just tastes better when it's boiled to 80°C exactly with a Bunsen burner.
You only asked for one scene but somehow I came up with a bunch of other things. This post was drawn across 2 months so the artstyle is all over the place. Thanks for your ask!
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pidgydraws · 5 months ago
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🐕 dog dads 🐕
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cassandracain52 · 6 months ago
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Reverse trope
where instead of the Bats forgetting that they’re adopted (something actual adoptees do on occasion and is hilarious) they forget that some of them *cough Damian cough* aren’t
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Jason in the heat of a probably ridiculous argument: Yeah well YOU’RE adopted!
Tim just as invested in said argument: So are YOU! We all are!
Damian who had previously been quietly watching this unfold while he drank his tea: Actually I’m not
Tim and Jason who didn’t realize he was there but are already DoneTM: …… Damian continuing to sip his tea entirely unbothered: :)
Damian: Because I’m not an orphan-
Jason: ok, yoU KNOW WHAT-
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or like in their group texts (that we know they have thanks to Nightwing (2016) #79)
*Steph changed the group chat name to “Bruce Wayne’s Personal Orpanage”*
Jason: Really?
Steph: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Steph: It’s the truth Damian: Both my parents are very much alive
Steph: Shhh you don’t count
Cass: Mine too Duke: Technically so are mine
Barbara: I still have a dad so there’s that
Steph: YOU GUYS ARE RUINING THE JOKE
Tim: Stephanie aren’t BOTH of your parents alive???
Steph: KNOW WHAT? FINE
*Steph changed the group chat name to “The Technicality Police”*
Tim: well that’s more accurate at least
Steph: :)
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Damian in his 10th argument with Tim of the day: That’s- this is-
Tim in full Antagonizing Big Brother mode: I’m listening
Damian -a Gen Z and best friend to Jon Kent- extremely frustrated: This is such Motherless behavior!
Tim taken aback: [voice cracking] W-what-?
Damian who didn’t mean to say that but doubling down anyway because his bloodline doesn’t believe in admitting mistakes: THIS! This is such Motherless behavior!
The rest of the family who is also motherless: :O
Cass whose been spending way too much time with Meme Queen Stephanie Brown and not involved in the argument but finding it entertaining regardless: [nodding along seriously] Facts
Tim: [visibly betrayed] CASS WHAT-
A video copy of the interaction gets sent out anonymously to the entire family. Barbara is the prime suspect but there is no proof as of yet (and they will never find any)
Steph, Cass, and Duke continue to respond “Motherless behavior” everytime one of the bats does something they deem questionable/insane. It is said often
It only stops when one night in the middle of patrol. Batman is in full Dark Knight mode (possibly in the middle of threatening someone) and descends from the ceiling into the middle of a warehouse drug deal, dark cape billowing out behind him-
and Steph just automatically whispers “Motherless behavior” forgetting her com was still very much on
She immediately realizes what she said and frantically apologizes but it’s too late.
Bruce just- Blue Screens. Completely stunned into silence
Dick -who was unfortunate enough to be the one teamed up with Batman tonight- is fighting for his life to choke back his laughter
Jason doesn’t even try to stop his and has collapsed to his knees from lack of air from how hard he’s laughing. Cass try’s half heartedly patting his back to help to no avail
The criminals are terrified into surrender from The Red Hood just laughing hysterically at seemingly nothing while Batman just Stands There
Damian ends up being the only one still functioning enough to continue arresting everyone, though he is privately amused and strangely proud
Tim and Barbara have saved both the com recordings and cowl footage to at least three different servers and sent it to absolutely everyone before Batman even recovers
Duke finds out second hand the next morning and is furious he missed the chance to see it in person. He declares he is moving to the nightshift so it doesn’t happen again. (He is all talk and goes to bed by 9 pm)
Bruce bans the phrase for life and promises swift and server punishment to anyone who dares to use it again
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moghedien · 2 months ago
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Minthara says “in Her name” when you first meet her and she’s following the Absolute but when you recruit her and she expresses that she no longer follows any god, but she still has an intact paladin oath, and she says “in your name” occasionally because she’s no longer Lolth’s paladin or the Absolute’s paladin, she’s your paladin
#😭#she might not think you’re a god or whatever but you’re the only one that ever came to save her#and if you let her read your mind you’re the only one she knows has no intention to hurt or use her#like I feel like what Minthara wants most of all is to not have to look over her shoulder or wait for the shoe to drop#like every relationship she’s had as a lolthsworn drow has come with the caveat that everyone will take her out if they have the chance#and if it benefits them even a little#lolth literally encourages this so long as you aren’t obvious about it#and lolth will 100% punish you the second she has an excuse to#and then the absolute like while she was being controlled probably felt more like genuine love than Minthara ever experienced#but it came with Orin and punishments for failing#and her being literallly mind controlled into her#so it’s still violent and threatening even if the extent of that is only realized after she’s pulled out of it#but then there’s you who pulled her out of that#who can clearly and plainly show her that you have no intention of hurting her even if it benefits you#and who went out of your way to rescue her when no one else she was devoted to ever would#and you offered her the means to not only stay safe from the absolute but to get revenge on it#of course it’s ‘in your name’ now you’re the only person that gave Minthara a reason for her to follow you#that wasn’t threats of violence and suffering#you literally gave her the opposite#she’s YOUR paladin it doesn’t matter if aren’t a god#you could be tho#Minthara#minthara baenre#bg3#baldur's gate 3
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armenelols · 3 months ago
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I don't recall the books ever specifying what weapons Elrond primarily fought with and while he is usually given a sword by both the movies and fandom, I think it would be incredibly hilarious if he came out with fucking Dramborleg. They are getting ready for battle and he brings out this huge ass axe his gramps once killed balrogs with. Sir, you were discussing poetry 10 minutes ago, where did that thing come from
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zetadraconis11 · 9 months ago
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HL Incorrect Quote #100
*in the Room of Requirement*
MC, bursting in: I finally did it!
Sebastian from the sofa: Did what?
MC, holding up the Field Guide: I finally found all the pages!
Natty, looking up from her book: THAT'S why you've been casting Revelio everywhere?
MC: Yep! And not only that, but I also found all of those Demiguise statues!
Poppy, while petting Highwing: ...is that why you've been taking cat naps all around Hogwarts?
MC: Yep.
Ominis, from a lounge chair: For the record, sleeping on the floors of Hogwarts are not as bad as you would think.
MC: Oh, and I found ALL of the Astronomy tables!
Amit, by a telescope: You did?! I hope it wasn't too dangerous...
MC: Nonsense! I've dealt with a whole lot worse than some mongrels and spiders. This was a piece of cake.
The group:
MC: And don't get me started on those bloody Merlin trials... But I did all 95 of them!
Sebastian, horrified: 95???
MC: Yes! It was not worth the pints of coffee and tea I downed, but I have done it all!
The group:
MC: I need to sleep. *keels over onto lounge*
The group:
Ominis: The more I hear about what MC does, the more concerned I get.
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wafflesrisa · 26 days ago
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I find that the recent rise of black and white thinking on the internet has led to an interesting phenomenon in F1 fandom spaces.
Nowadays a famous person needs to unsullied in all respects (morally, ethically, performatively) in order to be deemed unproblematic and worthy of support. It’s become impossible to be a fan of a driver and to recognise faults them in any way, because surely if you’re a fan of a driver and they mess up, then their mess up taints you in the same way it taints them (morally, ethically, performatively).
Putting drivers’ ethical “bad takes” aside, this has impacted even how fans respond to their driver simply having a bad weekend. It’s odd when a driver makes a human error or has a (even slightly) less successful weekend, and a significant proportion of their fans go into a panic and start finger pointing at anyone and everyone - the track, the team, the teammate, the stewards.
The false dichotomy here seems to be that either the driver has “lost his touch” or the driver was unfairly sabotaged or disadvantaged in some way.
It’s so strange. In the guise of supporting their favourite driver, these fans hold them up to an impossible standard where they are either bullied or washed.
In reality, their favourite driver is a human being and he’s going to pick himself up and go again next week.
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ohrival1412 · 3 months ago
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"Shinichi and Hakuba after their Sherlock Holmes fanfictions are discovered" tHANKS FOR YOUR REQUEST HAHAH
@zaharex here are Hakuba E-8 and Shinichi G-8 !
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fabdante · 6 days ago
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@zutaraweek day one: crest
kicking off zutara week with something very vague. i first made this design for zutara week 2022 (under the cut) and have been dying to draw it more detailed since. and the way the term crest both deals with the movement of water and like emblems, it felt like it was finally time
i am always a fan of zutara/tui and la parallels
art only blog - insta - inprnt - redbubble
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i originally drew this as an album cover in a 2022 piece about a record store au!
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kenneduck · 1 year ago
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Crying over the thought of no one remembering Link’s birthday. Like after the 100 years, Link wakes up and realizes one day he cannot recall his birthday.
To his dismay, neither Impa, Robbie, Purah nor Zelda recall his birthday. He acts as if it isn’t a big deal, but he’s always finding himself quite sad when celebrating the birthdays of others.
Sidon notices at his own birthday celebration that his Hylian friend has a sense of sorrow. One that isn’t possible to rid of with his famous smile and flex. When Sidon approaches Zelda, she reveals that Link cannot recall his birthday, and that no one who knew him 100 years ago seemed to remember or take note. Sidon looks sympathetic towards the revelation, but then he has a thought…
Moments later, it becomes rather apparent that Sidon, the literal 10 foot tall birthday shark, has slipped away from his own party! A search begins around the domain. Where did he wander off to?
While looking around, Link finds himself being the one to enter Sidon’s room. He hears a flipping of pages, and he curiously notices Sidon looking through a journal. Before Link’s presence gets known, Sidon smiles his famous smile, and shouts “I KNEW IT”!
Link walks over to the happy shark man. Wondering why Sidon dipped from his own celebration to read a… paper journal. One that seems… familiar. Mipha’s journal?
Sidon, seeing his friend, scoops him up in excitement! Shouting over and over a date that wasn’t too far off in the future. Link looked confused, and when Sidon noticed said confusion, Sidon smiled. “Your birthday, Link! Mipha… she wrote it down! I knew she would!”
Link looked puzzled for a moment. What did Link’s birthday have to do with anything? But then he understood… his birthday WAS remembered. It had a date again. It wasn’t lost. Sidon couldn’t help but show the page of Mipha’s diary that spoke of Link’s upcoming birthday. Of the plans she had to surprise him despite the calamity looming.
Link couldn’t help but tear up at his smiling tail-wagging friend. Sidon looked concerned, thinking he did something wrong, but the tight hug Link gave him said otherwise. He thanked him. Repeatedly. And Sidon only began to smile again. Immediately beginning to ramble off birthday plans for his dearest friend.
But to Sidon’s dismay, Link cut him off. Telling him that it’s not Link’s birthday they should be celebrating right now. That Sidon has a party to get back to. Sidon only pouts playfully before readying to return to the celebration.
After the two do, Link couldn’t help but catch himself looking towards Mipha’s statue throughout the party. A few looks paired with a smile, but a few… a few felt tied with tears.
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doctorsiren · 3 months ago
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age swap mogami? the most wettest cat kid ever
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hello chara undertale
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He just never had any positive adult influences in his life because he was a child star and was “always watched but never seen” (I’m quoting an ageswap fic called “A Good Person” by qrovers, please read it omg it’s so good 😭)
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Oh and then bonus is this one I drew yesterday (before I got this ask) based on a goofy stock photo
The inconsistency here is that Mogami wouldn’t be alive 😭
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