#.and then for some it's just me growling like a feral animal about my compulsive need to project onto everything whether it fits or not.

[dreamerdrop]

If I get attached to a character, I can promise you I've already started writing an essay in my head about why they're a CSA survivor in disturbing detail.

[sweetslittlefactory-moved]

Knee high dragon. Has wings but doesn't use them. Likes to walk around, holding his front paws together. Tail go flip! Purple w/ light yellow belly. Likes to sit on people's shoulders tho he's slightly too big. Will purr. Likes to sit in the sink for some unknown reason. Eats cereal straight from the box. Growls in his sleep. Accepts hugs, but ask him first. Very small spines, dark purple. WIGGLES. Probably tried to eat your headphones. Very sorry about it. Name ideas?

I would absolutely compulsively eat headphones and apologize, considering I’ve legit done that to a classmate’s homework without realizing. All of this seems really spot on other than having wings and doesn’t use.

As for names? I mean, you can go for Schrody, but if you want a Completely Different Name, I’d like to use a Kurdish one. 

Kurdish but not used as actual names:

-Mor (Kurdish simply for purple, very original.)

-Bradr (word for friend - my chosen name also translates to friend but my name is actually used as a name, while I’ve never heard Bradr used as a name)-Pchuka (Meaning ‘is small’, also not a Kurdish name)

-Tariq (Means dark)

- Zewi (Means silver, as in the adjective - silver as a noun would just be Zew)

-Zifer (Means zero, pretty sure it’s the same in Arabic?)

-Washin (Means ‘is wild’ or ‘the wild’, particularly in connotation with animals. Used as an insult but I said feral rights.)

Kurdish and used as actual names:

-Dilbirin (Means ‘remembered in heart’, literally ‘heart’ and ‘remembered’)

-Dilsoz (Meaning ‘green heart’, but is used as an expression for someone devoted/faithful/loyal, has a bit of a double meaning for me as an aromantic. I’m p sure it’s exclusively a feminine name tho so your dragon might have to make them a girl)

-Zengi (Means sound)

-Dilshad (Means ‘happy heart’)

-Sidar (Means shadow of a tree)

-Jiyan (Means life)

-Ajar (Means sprout)

-Bazi ((Means play (as in playing, not theatre) ))

-Dengdar (Means loud)

-Hozan (Means song)

-Kotcher/Kocher (Means nomad)

-Azad (Means free/freedom)

-Amez (Means hug)

-Ferzan (To be taught or to be teaching, kinda has a double meaning)-Kariz (Meaning spring)Anyhow aaaaaaaaaaa, I love this! Lemme know which name you go with :Oc 

[winters-blue-children]

The worst monster Billy knows is the one inside himself. It lashes out like a wild, raging animal. In the aftermath, compulsive and guilt-ridden, Billy has to face a few hard truths.

Harrington couldn’t possibly hate him as much as he hates himself.

AO3 / Ch 1 / Ch 2 / Ch 3

Steve spends an hour that evening staring at his Sports Illustrated Swimsuit poster of the gorgeous Christie Brinkley taped up on his wall. The blonde bombshell with beach blown hair and a skimpy white bikini riding high around her waist had been the star of multiple fantasies during the height of his sexual enlightenment.

A beautiful woman, soft in all the right places… he’s spent dozens of nights jerking off to Christie Brinkley. Who wouldn’t?

He doesn’t fucking get it.

Of all the guys he’d suspected of being queer, Billy Hargrove is the last on the list.

Billy drives a fast car, is dreadfully athletic, and has all the hottest girls in their school drooling over his ass… and he’d rather rubs dicks together with some dude rather than take his pick of any girl he wants. It’s fucking absurd.

Steve’s heard all about the queers in California. Dudes running around the streets half-naked, prancing about with their rainbow flags, proclaiming their proudness of their unconventional lifestyle… the thought had never struck any emotion in him other than disgust. But now, now he’s more… curious than anything else. Perhaps a bit confused, as well.

Billy’s from California. He’s got the natural tan going for him, unlike the models Steve stares at, knowing they’re probably covered in tanning oil, which only makes them more appealing. But Billy is the very definition of masculine. A douchebag through and through. Gruff and threatening, probably overcompensating, he realizes, now that Steve’s got this new information rattling around in his head.

He just never expected it to be a guy like Billy.

Steve thinks of Nancy, with her soft hair that smells like coconut shampoo, and a gentle smile that would always cause a flutter in his chest. She was small and delicate under his palms. Thinking of their intimate moments still gets his motor running. She’s fucking beautiful, with a heart of gold to boot. Everything he’s ever wanted.

Why would Billy go for another dude over that? Maybe something just got hardwired wrong in him.

Steve knows how dangerous this piece of information is. He could ruin the guy, easily. And maybe a part of him thinks Billy deserves it, the fucking shithead, who’s caused him more than a mild migraine. But he’s got enough compassion at least, to know this is something he should probably keep to himself.

This guy might be the worst thing to ever walk into his life. Steve spends the whole weekend agonizing over Billy Hargrove.  

Monday morning is still a mess because of it. His mind is jumbled and anxious as he walks towards the school from his car. Unfortunately for him, a moment of peace just doesn’t seem to be in the cards.

“Harrington!”

Steve freezes at the familiar voice. He curses silently to himself and turns around to see Billy strolling up to him in the parking lot.

“Hey, pretty boy,” the other man drawls, stopping a few feet away, typical obnoxious smirk on his lips.

Steve squirms under his gaze. Uncomfortably, he adjusts the strap of his bag over his shoulder. “Hey,” he mutters quietly, looking away.

“You look weird,” Billy tells him, scrutinizing him with furrowed brows.

Steve doesn’t quite meet his eyes. It’s too strange now. He can’t help but think about all the details he never cared for before. The other man’s stance, the shape of his lips, the glare of his gaze… What the fuck is Billy thinking about when he leers at him the way he does?

And what the hell is Steve supposed to do about it?

Billy gives him a strange look at his silence.

“The fuck is wrong with you, Harrington?”

“I-I gotta get to class.” Steve points towards the building and awkwardly gives him a nod before he makes a hasty exit. It probably would have worked better for him if it wasn’t plain knowledge that the first bell wouldn’t ring for another twenty minutes.

He groans to himself once he’s away. It’s like he’s forgotten what subtlety means. But he can’t act normal around the other man. He doesn’t even know what normal is anymore. Not with Billy, not with… anything, it seems. But he does know what dangerous territory is. And that’s what Billy feels like. After the past few weeks he’s had, he thinks he wants to stay as far away from dangerous as he possibly can.

Steve surrounds himself with his typical crowd between classes. He looks up and down each hallway to make sure there’s no sign of Billy, and heads in the opposite direction when he spots him. He’s quieter than usual. Distracted. Doesn’t speak much when spoken to.

He must be more conspicuous than he thinks because Nancy grabs his arm on his way to his next class.

“You okay?” She asks him, concern written all over her face.

He’s touched by her concern. Typical Nancy. Steve gives her a nod and a half-smile in return. “Yeah, of course,” he says lightly. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Nancy frowns as she studies him. They’ve been on good terms since their breakup, all things considered. After all, what is the end of a teenage romance when monsters and psychic children are concerned? They just weren’t meant to be. Life is bigger than Steve and Nancy. The year they shared together was rife with imperfections. And he can’t fault her for any of it.

“You seem… a little off.”

A classic Steve Harrington grin spreads on his face. “I’m fine, Nance,” he chuckles lightly to let her know he’s alright. “You know me,” he gives her shrug of his shoulders. “I’m always fine.”

She doesn’t look like she believes him.

~

The worst part about attending a small high school is that short of staying away altogether, it’s almost impossible to properly avoid someone. Apparently, hiding out in one of the private study rooms of the library during his free period wasn’t sufficient means to evade the new king of Hawkins High.

Billy is smart enough to recognize the signs of someone purposely avoiding him. And he’s pissed as hell about it.

Steve’s head snaps up when the door to his study space opens and in strides Billy Hargrove, scowl on his features as he slams the door behind him louder than anyone should in the library, of all places.

Steve gapes in shock. His pencil slips from his fingers, dropping onto the text that he was barely focused on. Because now they’re alone, in an enclosed space, nothing but tense air between them. He straightens when Billy approaches his desk.

“You been avoidin’ me, Harrington?”

“No,” Steve lies.

Billy sees right through him. “You’re a terrible liar.”

“I’m not… lying,” Steve stutters, as he closes his books in lieu of looking at the other man.

“Then what is this, huh?” Billy demands. “I thought… I thought we were okay.” There’s a hint of insecurity in the way his voice breaks at the end that causes guilt to strike in Steve’s chest. He never meant to make the other man feel bad. Billy’s been trying, he reminds himself. He remembers what he told Max during their conversation that had been overshadowed by his jarring revelation. Billy’s trying.

“I-I just um…” Steve’s mind blanks as he stands from his seat. His breath hitches and he takes a step back, suddenly desperate for any small amount of space between them. He clears his throat. “I-I have class,” he mutters pathetically.

“So skip it,” Billy hisses.

“I can’t skip class,” Steve says through tight lips.

“Why not?” Billy asks, taking a step closer.

“Because… because I can’t be failing physics my last year!” Steve says desperately.

“I’m sure you’ll get by just fine,” Billy says darkly.

There’s a tightness in Steve’s chest as he realizes how close they stand. Never before had he felt the significance of the space between them until now. Not even when Billy was bashing his face in. His nerves are on fire and he feels the danger of the situation he’s in.

“Look… I know,” he says softly.

“You know what?” Billy’s voice is cold and hard as he steps closer still.

“I know you’re…” Steve swallows and looks away. “I know you’re a fucking queer.”  

He didn’t mean for it to come out like that.

Billy freezes. For a moment, Steve thinks he’s about to get his ass beat again. Until Billy lets out a hysterical laugh. His shoulders shake with peals of laughter and his grin stretches ear to ear. “What world are you living in, Harrington?” He sounds just unhinged enough that Steve thinks it might not be good idea to be in a cramped space with him. “Is this how you justify it to yourself? Now that I’m here stealing all the bitches from you? You tell yourself I’m a fucking fag?”

Steve flinches and drops his eyes.

“Answer me,” Billy says dangerously. “King Steve.”

“I think you should step back,” Steve says softly.

“Or what?” Billy demands. His eyes are wide with fury, teeth bared like a feral animal as he takes another step forward.

“Don’t do this, man.” Steve shakes his head slowly.

“Or what?” Billy growls again, getting in his face.

What a start, Steve realizes the other man has backed him into the wall. A shudder runs down his spine. Either the school needs to turn down the damn heat, or it’s just radiating from the man nearly pressed against him.

Steve straightens himself to his full height, determined to stand his ground. “I’m not gay,” he says softly.

Cold, blue eyes bore into him. “You sure about that?” Billy whispers, his voice hard as steel.

“What?” Steve’s voice is almost irritable as he chuckles at the thought. “I hate to crush your dreams, but I’m not a damn queer.”

“Hm,” Billy lets out a dry laugh. He nods his head lightly as he considers him. “You sure seem like one to me, Harrington. Pretty boy.”

Steve stares back at a mask that’s a good attempt for cool and collected. But there’s something else there that he wasn’t expecting. His brow furrows as he studies blue eyes and a tense gaze. “Holy shit,” he mutters under his breath.

Billy frowns. “What?”

“You like me,” Steve whispers softly. And the realization hits him like a ton of bricks. “Holy shit. You actually like me.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Billy growls, his face blanching under the light of the room. The immediate defensiveness, like a caged animal, tells Steve all that he needs to know.

“You do!” Steve says quickly. “That’s what this is!” And then it all makes sense. The man’s been smitten with him since he first laid eyes on him at Tina’s Halloween bash. Every moment on the court, the eyes, the smirks, the leers and touches, every antagonistic moment has led them here. Like a kid pulling on some girl’s pigtails on the playground. He can’t help but laugh because it suddenly makes so much sense. “Billy Hargrove actually has feelings like a human being.”

“Fuck you, Harrington.”

“No, no.” Steve murmurs candidly. “I see what this is now.” He takes every advantage to make the other man feel uncomfortable for once. “You like me. God, you might even be in love with me,” he exclaims arrogantly. “I mean, the alternative is that you just want my dick, and I don’t think that’s-”

Billy’s eyes flash dangerously a split second before his hands grab the lapels of Steve’s jacket. He slams him into the wall behind him and Steve’s back thumps painfully from the sheer force of it. “Fuck you.” Billy hisses darkly. “You’ll shut your damn mouth if you know what’s good for you, Harrington.”

Steve swallows nervously. His hands are wrapped around Billy’s forearms, but the other man doesn’t budge an inch. He stares, wide-eyed and shuddering at their proximity. “You gonna hit me again?” He whispers. He’s still got healing bruises around his eyes from their last bout.

The other man remains quiet.

They breathe heavily and he feels it. Electricity.

For a ridiculous moment, Steve thinks that Billy’s about to kiss him.

But the grip against him is too tight for comfort. Steve trembles, feeling the other man’s hot breath against his lips. His shoulders sag, just a bit. “Billy,” he murmurs softly. “I’m not queer. I’m… I’m sorry.”

He doesn’t know what he’s expecting in response to that. Devastation, maybe? Disappointment? But that might just be his ego talking.

A moment later, Billy smirks. “Let’s find out,” he growls, amusement in his voice.

“W-what?” Steve squeaks. He freezes when Billy’s hands move from his jacket to his belt. He gives a shocked little flinch when his pants are hastily undone. “What are you doing?” He gasps, as Billy reaches into his pants and palms his half-hard cock within his briefs. He might be having a fucking mental breakdown.

“You seem like you’re enjoying this, Harrington.”

Steve’s head knocks against the wall behind him, shutting his eyes as he shudders. “Holy shit, Billy-” For a brief second, he wonders if he’s freaking out too much to get fully hard. But with a few smooth strokes of Billy hand-the fucker does not mess around-he’s good and stiff within seconds.

Billy flicks his thumb under the sensitive spot right under the head and twists his hand just right, and Steve is trembling under his touch, hard as a fucking rock.

“Billy, wait-”

And then the other man sinks to his knees.

Any words Steve had left to say never make it past his throat when Billy pulls his pants down to his knees. Steve is left gaping in shock as he stares down at him. He lets out a choked gasp when Billy takes him in his mouth. His knees damn near give out when he’s buried in the wet heat of a man who clearly knows what he’s doing.

Billy’s technique is impeccable. It’s a shock to realize that this likely isn’t the first dick Billy’s had in his mouth.

Steve’s hands weakly bury themselves in hairspray coated curls. The other man lets his hands guide his motions. Slow, heavy circles of his tongue run along the sensitive underside of his cock. The sight of Billy’s lips stretched wide around him causes his hips to involuntarily jerk forward. A growl from deep within Billy’s throat leaves Steve trembling. And when Billy’s eyes glare up at him, meeting his own in a moment of shocking clarity, Steve almost cums right then and there.

Steve’s grip tightens on Billy’s hair. He continues to thrust into that hot, welcoming mouth. He’s not holding back, not like he does with the girls he’s done this with, and Billy takes it all with ease. Strong hands press bruises into his hips. He’s so close. They maintain their eye contact as Billy hums around his cock like a pro.

As determined as Steve is to keep his eyes open, like it might give him some semblance of control over an uncontrollable situation, he squeezes them shut when his orgasm swells through him like a wave. He groans heavily as he cums, biting down hard on his lip in fear of being overheard through thin walls.

His eyes flutter open weakly. Billy’s watching his face the entire fucking time. He swallows every hot pulse as Steve empties himself down his throat, and somehow makes it look elegant. He gives him one last, slow lick to his oversensitive cock as he pulls away, leaving Steve trembling on shaky legs, weak and boneless as he sags against the wall. It takes everything he’s got to maintain enough motor function to not to collapse to the ground.

Billy speaks first after he’s climbed back to this feet. “What’s the verdict, huh?” The hoarseness of his voice goes straight to Steve’s cock.

Steve mutters an incoherent stream of obscenities under his breath, and gives a shocked little flinch when Billy not so gently stuffs him back into his pants. He bites down a moan as he glares defiantly at the other man, who wears an arrogant smirk on his face as he raises his eyebrows.

Even under normal circumstances, Steve wishes nothing more than to wipe that look off his face. And these aren’t normal circumstances. Billy Hargrove just sucked his brain out through his fucking dick.

“You fucker,” Steve manages to croak. His voice is shaky and unrecognizable to his own ears. He adjusts his clothes as well as he can, as he tries to get his limbs to respond again.

Billy still doesn’t put any more space between them. There’s a wicked grin on his lips as he looks at him hungrily. For a crazy moment, Steve thinks his confidence would actually be really attractive if he wasn’t such a douchebag about it.

He straightens as he slowly regains his composure. It suddenly feels too intimate. Too weird. Too terrifying. Like he doesn’t know whether he wants to crush their lips together or push him the hell away from him.

Boldly, Billy runs a hand down his chest as a quiet little moan escapes from Steve’s lips. “You sure seem like a fucking queer to me,” he growls, his voice low as he leans even closer, so close he might be able to hear Steve’s heart pounding in his chest. “Princess.”

Steve closes his eyes, his initial resistance gone. “You are such a dick,” he whispers sourly. He feels the ghost of fingers digging into his hips, and a warm breath on his lips.

“Hm,” Billy chuckles softly. “Takes one to know one, Harrington.”

Steve groans quietly. He just suffered the best blow job of his life, from a guy, and one he has every reason to hate, no less.

The only coherent thought he can muster, is that he wants more.