#(this was an OLD post I made way long ago around the RELEASE DATE Anniversary in 2020) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ukulelecal · 4 years ago

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Bloom - Part Two

The story of flowers.

Pairing: Poet!Luke Hemmings x Female!OC

Warnings: a bit more angst but def more fluff. implied smut. a couple swears probably. hella feelings. mentions of anxiety

Word Count: 6.8k

A/N: here is the second part!! less sad than the first!! lol anyways, i hope you guys love it, there will be one more part after this! reminder that feedback and reblogs are sosososo important to creators x

series masterlist

my masterlist // posted on ao3

*One year later*

Devon’s new school wasn’t all that she had imagined it to be.

Her classes were great. She was learning so much and her professors were very encouraging and helpful. Everything else, however, wasn’t so ideal.

She wasn’t fond of her classmates. Perhaps she was just so used to her old school, but everyone rubbed her the wrong way. She had only found a few friends that she trusted, but she didn’t even see them much. They had attended undergrad at that school, and they already knew everyone. Devon couldn’t quite make her way into the friend group.

She wasn’t a fan of the city, either. It simply didn’t have the vibe or the excitement that home did.

Home. She tried not to use that word to describe where she once lived, but her mind continuously went back to it. She knew exactly why.

That’s where Luke was.

Devon hadn’t heard from him since she moved. She left with a very brief goodbye and good luck wish, but that was it. She held back her tears during the Uber ride to the airport and all through the plane ride.

Luke, now alone in the apartment, broke down as soon as she left. He should have been the one taking her to the airport, kissing her goodbye and promising that everything would be okay. But nothing was okay anymore.

It had been a year since Devon moved, and the now broken up couple was doing a lot better. Devon distracted herself with schoolwork and trying to find her place in her new environment. She took up kickboxing as well as a way to let out her emotions, although the muscles she was developing were a plus as well.

Luke still had the same coping mechanism he always had; writing poetry. He poured his heart and soul into countless poems. They were completely raw, completely honest. He held nothing back. Frankly, they were his best work.

Devon’s first year of grad school officially came to an end. It was as if a weight was lifted off her shoulders. She couldn’t say she was happy there, but she wasn’t there to make friends. She was there to get her master’s, and she wasn’t going to quit. For herself and for her family.

A very unexpected text quickly changed any plans that Devon might have had for the summer.

It was from Luke.

“Hey Devon. I know it’s been a while and I hope grad school is going well. But it's official. My first poetry book is getting published. You probably don’t want to hear from me, and I understand, but you were always the person that believed in me the most. Thank you for that. Truly. I wouldn’t be here without you. I’m having a release party in a few weeks. Nothing big, just close friends and family. It would mean a lot to me if you came.”

Her heart skipped a beat as soon as she saw his name flash across her screen. Not a single word had been exchanged between them in the past year. A part of Devon had been wishing that he would reach out, even if it was just to say hi and check in. She almost texted him a few times, but something always stopped her.

Hearing from him after so long brought an array of emotions, but the one that overwhelmed her the most was pride.

Devon knew how much this meant to him. He opened up to her about it on their very first date freshman year. She remembered sitting across from him at the coffee shop on campus, and the way his eyes lit up as he talked about releasing a book. She found his passion admirable, and she had every faith in him that he would succeed. She was his biggest supporter through the years; she was there to comfort him when he got rejected and help him through his bouts of writer’s block. He always told her that she was his biggest inspiration. Most of his poems ended up being about her in some capacity.

Despite everything that happened between, Devon couldn’t fathom missing this momentous time in his life.

With a deep breath, she typed out a reply.

“I would love to come. It means a lot that you thought of me.”

The weeks leading up to the party were utterly nerve wracking, for both Devon and Luke.

It took Luke a few days to work up the courage to invite Devon. He was scared she hated him and wouldn’t care to come, that she would be appalled at him thinking even for a second that she might want to see him again. It took a lot of convincing from Ashton, a college friend that he invited to move into the apartment once Luke realized he couldn’t afford the rent on his own and that he couldn’t stand being in the apartment by himself, but he did it. Luke wasn’t sure he breathed at all in the minutes it took her to respond.

Now that she was officially attending, it left the two to question what seeing each other would be like after a year apart. Would it be awkward? Would they end up having another argument and cause more pain? Would they be unrecognizable to each other?

The uncertainty was painstaking, but Devon reminded herself that she was there to support Luke, and Luke reminded himself that he would have given up a long time ago if it weren’t for Devon.

The time finally came for the release party. They both hardly slept the night before. Luke was alone in the bed that he used to share with the woman he hadn’t seen in a year, while she laid in a hotel bed just blocks away. Things felt different knowing that they weren’t hundreds of miles away anymore, and the next day they would see each other.

Devon pandered around her hotel room all day, doing her best to distract herself. She scrolled through every channel on the television, but nothing kept her attention. She did a workout, but every song on her workout playlist managed to remind her of Luke in some way.

They day dragged on until it was finally time for Devon to get ready. She played calming music in the shower to slow her heart rate and took her time doing her hair and makeup. It took some effort to steady her hands, but she got the job done.

Luke had been able to keep himself busy all day. A couple of his friends, Calum and Michael, shared a flat that was decently bigger than Luke’s apartment, and graciously offered to host the party there. Him and Ashton went over there early to make sure the place was clean and that all the food and drinks were ready.

Once guests started arriving, the nerves came back in full force.

He could only hope that he was really ready to see Devon.

For her, the Uber ride to the address Luke gave her hit every single red light. She bounced her leg in the back seat, unsure if she was thankful for the longer ride or if she hated it. On one hand, it gave her more time to prepare herself. However, every passing second made her nervousness increase.

Time stopped when the car parked in front of the flat.

She stared at it for a moment, the fact that Luke was just inside making her fingers tremble.

She didn’t realize she was still sitting there until the driver asked her if she was okay. She quickly thanked him and climbed out of the car.

Devon slowly made her way up the walkway, reminding herself with each step that this was a huge deal for Luke. His dreams were finally coming true. He had expressed to her that he credited her in part for his success. He must not have harbored any major negative feelings against her, otherwise she wouldn’t have been invited.

She almost felt a sense of calm as she reached the front door.

She slowly pushed it open, Luke having told her it would be unlocked and she could let herself in. Once inside, she didn’t see him right away. She recognized some friends from her undergraduate days, but nobody seemed to notice her right away.

A tall figure came out from the kitchen, and Devon had to do a double take.

Luke had certainly grown in their year apart.

His curls were shorter in the back and longer on top, and it looked like they had been dyed at some point. He opted for a pair of glasses instead of contacts, and he had a beard. She had never seen him with more than some stubble. He had on a forest green sweater that she always said was her favorite; she wondered if he had worn it on purpose. She couldn’t blame him if he did, considering she was wearing the long sleeved, yellow floral dress that Luke always said he loved on her.

He looked completely different, but at the same time, he was still her Luke.

All of her anxieties melted away the second he looked at her.

“Devon.”

It felt so natural. It was as if all of the pain that came from the last time they saw each other had gone away. They both knew in the back of their minds there wasn’t any bad blood between them, as much as their breakup hurt. Neither had exactly done anything wrong.

“You made it,” he continued through a deep breath.

“You know I wouldn’t miss this for the world, Lu.”

Devon looked the same. Her hair was a little longer than the last time he saw her, and he could tell that she had put on some muscle from the way she filled out her dress a little more. She looked good, healthy.

Luke silently thanked whoever was listening that she seemed alright, at least physically. He could acknowledge that he went into a bit of a downward spiral in terms of taking care of himself when she left. He hardly slept and completely shut himself out from everyone that reached out to him. Ashton moving in helped, but certain days made it bad again, like when their anniversary and Devon’s birthday passed. He didn’t want the same for her. He wanted her to do better than him.

Devon had her bad days too. She did better at the beginning when she had so much on her plate, but once things settled down, she was a wreck for a while, not much different than what Luke was like.

He hesitated only a moment before taking Devon into his arms. He prepared himself for her to pull away, but she did quite the opposite. She melted into him, cheek resting against the soft material of his sweater.

Devon remembered all the times she needed a hug. Whenever she had a bad day or was stressed out over school or simply just wanted to be held, Luke was always there. He would mumble a soft assurance under his breath as he took her into his arms, holding her tight as if she’d be gone forever if he let go. He would whisper whatever it was she needed to hear at the moment, although sometimes it was nothing at all.

She didn’t realize how badly she needed this one.

“I’m so glad you’re here, Dev,” Luke whispered into her hair. He could smell the same coconut shampoo she always used and the warm, sweet perfume she always wore. It brought a sense of comfort and familiarity.

“I’m glad to be here. I...I really missed you, Luke.”

The confession felt good. She tried to deny the fact that she missed him, but seeing him again, she realized how much she really had.

“I missed you too.”

Luke pulled away from the hug and kept his hands on Devon’s shoulders. The same blue eyes met the same brown ones. The ghosts of smiles tugged at their corners of their lips. Every worry they had about seeing each other had gone away.

“I want to say congratulations on your book,” Devon mumbled, fiddling with the small clutch she brought. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Thank you,” he responded, a slight blush creeping up his cheeks. “I have to say, I-”

His sentence got caught off by a shout of his name from an arriving guest. He sighed and sent Devon an apologetic look. There was a lot that needed to be said, so much that needed to be talked about, but they knew that this wasn’t the time or place to do so.

“It’s fine, go on. We’ll catch up later, bub-” she cut herself off, the pet name she called him so often about to slip from her lips so naturally. “Okay?”

Luke sighed sadly but gave her a smile. He understood why she stopped herself, but God, he would have loved to hear her call him that again.

“Okay. See you in a bit, Dev.”

Luke slowly walked away to greet the new arrivals while Devon wandered off to find people she knew. She came across her good friends from undergrad - mutual between her and Luke - who thankfully seemed excited to see her. They made small talk and asked about grad school before easing into questions about Luke. She should have expected it, but she hadn’t talked much about the breakup since it first happened. It was easy to simply not mention it to her grad school group and they wouldn’t know the difference, but these were the girls that she called sobbing at random times during the day when she needed to talk. It was natural that they were curious.

“Did you two talk at all while you were gone?” One asked, and Devon shook her head.

“No,” she sighed. “I think that was best, though.”

Devon’s eyes trailed to the right. Luke was talking to some family members, laughing. A small grin tugged at the corners of her lips. His laugh was musical and contagious. She always felt proud of herself when she made him laugh. Not that it was a difficult task; he loved to laugh. For Devon, getting to hear the noise was like a gift.

“Dev!”

She snapped her gaze back to her friends. Their expressions were a mixture of smug and concerned. It was obvious that Devon hadn’t gotten over Luke in the past year. She still looked at him the same way she always did. They were still concerned that she would get her heart broken again.

“You still love him, don’t you?”

Devon glanced over at him one more time. She tried to convince herself that she didn’t. She almost threw away her shoebox of poems just to prove it to herself, but she couldn’t do it. It would always be him.

“Of course I do.”

…

The rest of the night, Luke and Devon didn’t speak. They weren’t avoiding each other, but the weight of the conversation they needed to have required the crowd to go away and the festivities to die down before it could happen. They exchanged glances and small smiles, saving the talking for later.

Devon purposely hung back as the crowd startled to trickle out the door. Luke had made a small speech thanking everyone for coming and celebrating with him. Everyone took it as the hint that the party was over. Deciding to help out while she waited, Devon busied herself cleaning up a bit in the kitchen.

Footsteps caught her attention, but they didn’t belong to who she figured they did. Instead of seeing Luke, she saw Ashton. He was Luke’s best friend, and while him and Devon never got super close, she still considered him a friend.

“Hey, Dev,” Ashton greeted with a grin, opening his arms for a hug that she gladly accepted.

“Hi, Ash. How have you been?”

“Good. Just working,” he chuckled as he pulled away from the hug. “You? How’s grad school?”

“It’s pretty good.” Good if he asked about her academics and not her social life, that is.

“That’s good.”

Ashton leaned against the counter across from her, shooting her a look. She raised her eyebrows in expectation.

“Luke’s been freaking out, you know,” Ashton mumbled, sticking his hands in his pockets. “About seeing you.”

Devon sighed and ran a hand through her hair. Somehow, knowing that he was nervous too was comforting.

“Glad it wasn’t just me.”

“He really missed you. I’m sure he’ll tell you all this himself, but in case you don’t believe him, take it from me. He missed you so, so much.”

Devon couldn’t help but smile a little. It was good to hear it from someone else.

“I missed him too. A lot.”

Before Ashton could reply, Luke stepped into the kitchen, eyes flickering back and forth between his best friend and his ex girlfriend. Words got caught in Devon and Luke’s throats, neither of them sure what to say.

“I guess that’s my cue to get out,” Ashton joked, breaking the awkward silence. “Let me know when you’re ready to go home, Luke.”

The man walked out of the kitchen to help Calum and Michael clean up in the living room while Devon turned to look at Luke with furrowed eyebrows.

“Home?” She questioned.

“Ashton moved into the apartment a little while after you left,” Luke admitted, scratching the back of his neck. He took Ashton’s spot against the counter. “I needed a roommate to help with the rent.”

He left out the fact that being alone in there only reminded him that she was gone and he needed someone to keep him company.

Devon nodded in understanding, but felt another twinge of guilt. She hadn’t considered that she was leaving the financial burden onto him. Thankfully Ashton was there.

“How was your night?” Devon asked genuinely. The party was to celebrate his success, and she genuinely hoped he enjoyed it.

“It was really great.” Luke sent her a thankful grin. “I know I said it before, but it really means a lot to me that you’re here. I was afraid you wouldn’t want to come.”

“This is everything you’ve ever wanted. After everything we’ve been through, I would never miss this moment in your life.”

Devon sent him a sad smile that he returned. There was still so much that needed to be said, so much to discuss. A tension hung between them, but not one of anxiety or dread. It was desperation and desire. A yearning for what they once had.

“We need to talk, Dev,” Luke whispered what they were both thinking. “Like, really talk.”

“I know we do.” She glanced at the clock on the wall beside his head. “But it’s getting late. My flight back isn’t until Monday. Maybe we can meet up tomorrow, if you’re free? Get lunch?”

Luke nodded in agreement. It would be best if they both got some sleep and recharged before talking seriously.

“That sounds good.” Luke turned to look at the clock as well and laughed. “I know it’s past your bedtime.”

Devon rolled her eyes playfully. She was the “go to bed early, wake up early” type, while Luke was the opposite.

“Exactly. I need my beauty sleep.”

“Boy, do I know it.”

The two laughed together, for the first time in a long time. It felt so right.

“I should head back then,” Devon announced, reaching behind to grab her clutch that she had set on the counter. “Let me just call an Uber and I’ll be out of here.”

“Don’t worry about that. Ash and I came together, he’ll drive you back. Where are you staying?”

Not one to turn down a free ride, Devon rattled off the name of her hotel. Luke led her to the living room to get Ashton and say goodbye to Calum and Michael. Luke thanked them again for letting him have the party at their place before they were out the door and piled in Ashton’s car. Luke took shotgun while Devon slipped into the back.

The ride to the hotel was quiet. Only Ashton’s soft indie music and the sound of other cars filled the car. Shortly, Ashton pulled to a stop in front of Devon’s hotel. Luke turned around in his seat to face her.

“Thanks again for coming, Dev,” he mumbled softly, a grin on his face.

“Thanks for inviting me. And thanks for the ride, Ashton.” He nodded in acknowledgement before she turned her gaze back to Luke. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Tomorrow. Who knows what tomorrow would bring?

“See you tomorrow.”

Devon climbed out of the car and headed towards the doors, sparing one last glance and a wave before heading inside. Luke watched as she walked in, a small sigh escaping his lips. He turned his head to see Ashton with a smirk on his face.

“What?” Luke questioned.

“You still love her, don’t you, mate?”

Luke sighed again, glancing back towards the doors. Devon was already out of sight, probably in the elevator already. He knew exactly what she was going to do when she got to her room. She would kick off her shoes and then take her makeup off. She’d go through her night time skin care routine, put her hair in a bun with a silk scrunchie, and finally change into her pajamas, which were usually just a big t-shirt and panties. She would probably spend some time reading or watching cooking videos on TikTok before going to bed.

“Of course I do.”

…

Devon swiped one last bit of lip gloss across her lips when Luke texted her that he was outside. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed her purse and phone before heading downstairs to meet him.

The anxiety was coming back. Seeing Luke was one thing, but having a full on conversation was another. It didn’t help that the conversation would surely lead to the topic of their relationship. Their breakup.

Luke was feeling similarly. He had paced around the apartment all morning until Ashton gave him a pep talk. He reminded him that if they didn’t talk, Devon would just leave again and nothing would change. Nothing would get fixed.

The sound of a creaky car door opening snapped Luke from his thoughts, looking up to see Devon climbing in. He sent her a smile.

“Hey, Dev.”

“Hey, Luke. Bertha’s still kicking, I see?” Devon joked as she buckled her seatbelt. She knew that Luke wasn’t going to get rid of his beloved Prius until absolutely necessary, but the fact that the car still functioned at all was shocking.

“I think it might be her time soon, but for now, she gets me where I need to go.”

Bertha survived the drive to the small diner that Devon and Luke agreed on, albeit the radio cut out a few times. It was a new place and Luke had been wanting to try it. A part of Devon wondered if he really wanted to try it or if he just didn’t want to take her to one of the places that they frequented when they were together. Frankly, she wouldn’t have wanted to go to one of their old spots either. It would have felt too odd.

Once inside and seated, a waitress came to take coffee orders before scurrying away.

“Tell me about grad school,” Luke began, saving the more serious topics of conversation for later. It was best to start off casual and simply catch up on everything that had happened in the past year.

“It’s alright,” Devon sighed. She would have fibbed, but she felt no need to lie to Luke. “My classes are great. I’ve learned so much and my professors are awesome. It’s just…”

She trailed off, unsure how to put her thoughts into words without sounding pathetic. She didn’t want Luke to judge her.

“What?” He pressed gently, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“It’s the other students, I guess. Everyone at our school was so great, but the people there are just not so friendly. And most of the other grad students did undergrad there, so I couldn’t really fit my way into a friend group. And there’s just not as much to do in the city as there is here,” she explained, her hands occupying themselves with the napkin in her lap.

She locked eyes with Luke, waiting for his response. He could have used it against her. He could have guilt tripped her for leaving and then not being happy. But Luke would never do that and Devon knew it.

“Well that’s not good,” he mumbled sincerely. “I’m sorry, Dev.”

He truly did feel bad. Every day while Devon was gone, he thought about her. He hoped she was having a good day and that her education was going well. It pained him to think that she wasn’t having a great time.

“It’s okay. I mean, I’m there for my master’s, not to make friends.” The waitress came back with their drinks and took their lunch orders. “Anyways, tell me about your book! What happened with the publishers and everything?”

The fact that Devon’s grad school wasn’t everything that she had imagined was still bothering him but Luke went along, knowing she wouldn’t want to talk about it.

“I sent another draft to one of the ones that was interested before, a while after you left. He said he liked the majority of it but wanted a few different ones. It took me a while to figure out what he wanted, but eventually I got it,” he rambled. “I’m really happy with it.”

“I’m glad,” she replied, heart swelling with pride. “When does it come out?”

“Next week.”

Devon hummed in acknowledgement, already making a mental note to pick up a copy for herself.

“How about work?” She questioned after a sip of her cappuccino.

“You’ll never believe it,” Luke chuckled. “I got promoted to a manager position.”

“Really? It’s about time!”

Devon and Luke had a running joke about Luke’s job. He had been there the longest other than the owner, an old woman who still moved like a teenager. She always hung a promotion over his head, suggesting it but never following through. Luke knew she was planning on giving it to him eventually. It was just a matter of time until she actually did, and the two would always make jokes about it.

They made small talk until their food came, causing the duo to fall into silence. Meaningless conversation about the weather could only last so long until what really needed to be talked about came out.

Soup and sandwiches didn’t last long enough. Their plates were cleared and there was no point in stalling anymore.

“I think we fucked up.”

Luke’s statement was unsugarcoated. He couldn't say for sure how Devon felt, but every day throughout the past year, Luke felt like he was making a mistake. Everyone around them was shocked at the news of their breakup; if there were any college sweethearts that would actually last, it would be them. That certainly didn’t help Luke’s pain when everyone else knew it was a mistake too.

Devon felt tears burn the back of her eyes as she nodded softly. He was right. Perhaps it was best at the time, but they couldn’t do another year of being apart.

“I think we did.”

Her voice broke, taking a deep breath to calm herself down and not cry in the restaurant.

“Hey,” Luke cooed soothingly, noticing the tears and reaching across the table for her hand. As his hand encased hers, at that moment, everything felt like it was going to be okay. “Maybe we should go somewhere more private.”

Luke paid the check and made their way back to Bertha. The need for privacy left them with two options; Devon’s hotel room or the apartment.

“Maybe we could go to my hotel room,” Devon suggested. “That way we won’t bother Ashton.”

That was only part of the reason. Devon wasn’t sure how she would feel if she stepped into her old home in the current state of their relationship. All of the memories her and Luke had would come flooding back. The hotel room was a neutral place without connection to what once was.

Luke agreed and drove to the location he remembered from the night before. The elevator ride up to Devon’s room was heavily silent, hands brushing against each other but never interlocking. The sound of the door shutting behind them once in the room was thunderous, the sound signifying that there was absolutely nothing between them and the inevitable anymore.

They stood in the middle of the room for a moment, looking anywhere but each other. There was no good way to start the conversation. There was no easy way to talk about a painful breakup that led to a year apart, then being reunited.

Without the right words in mind, Devon threw herself at Luke. She wrapped her arms tight around his middle and buried her head into his chest. Luke returned the gesture, holding her as close as he could. The hug said more than what either of them could put into words.

It wasn’t until a few minutes that Devon finally found something to say.

“I can’t keep doing this, Lu,” she whispered shakily. “I can’t keep missing you like this.”

“This is all my fault, Dev. I was the one who didn’t think we could do it. Fuck, honey, I’m so sorry.”

Devon surely didn’t think it was his fault. He had every right to be upset that she was moving so far away, and he had every right to be scared of what the distance would do to their relationship. She felt the same way. They broke up to spare themselves the pain of long distance. It hadn’t taken long for them to realize that the pain of being broken up was much, much worse.

As much as she tried to push the thoughts away, Devon couldn’t help thinking about how if she hadn’t left, this wouldn’t have happened. She knew that she did nothing wrong and that her education was just as important, but she had never intended to pursue it in expense of her relationship.

“This isn’t your fault. It was both of us. We were just saving ourselves from the pain. Besides, I was the one that left-”

“No,” Luke cut her off, glancing down at her. “Don’t you dare blame yourself for this. You did absolutely nothing wrong.”

Devon lifted her head up to meet his gaze. His face was serious but his eyes were completely sincere. She had always feared that he would hold a grudge against her for leaving. One look into the gorgeous blue eyes that she fell in love with told her that he didn’t.

“I never want you to blame this on you going to grad school. I want you to know that I completely support your decision and all your aspirations, honey. I will never hold that against you.”

Tears brimmed Devon’s eyes again, but these weren’t tears of pain. They were of love and adoration. Luke was the most amazing man she had ever known. He had a heart of gold and was one hell of a poet. She had never felt so loved as she felt by him.

“Please tell me this isn’t over, Luke,” she whispered, hands moving to cup his bearded cheeks. A single tear slipped down the soft skin of Devon’s cheek. “I love you. I never stopped. Please tell me there can be an us again.”

Luke wasn’t sure when he started crying, but a sudden wetness on his cheek alerted him of the act. His hands tugged Devon’s waist to bring her closer, noses brushing touching and breath mingling. They could hardly remember the last time they had been that close, the last time they felt love so intensely.

“I’ve wanted us back since that day a year ago. I love you more than anything, Devon. Always have, always will.”

For the first time in over a year, Luke and Devon’s lips connected in a kiss. It was nothing short of passionate and heavy. The love they hadn’t been able to express for so long was rising to the surface, coming out in the form of mumbled words, bruising kisses and desperate touches.

Frantic fingers worked the buttons of Devon’s flannel, slowly pushing her backwards until the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed. The offending item was discarded to the floor and the newly reunited couple crawled onto the bed. Devon shivered under Luke, a reaction caused by a mixture of the cool sheets against her bare back and his lips on her neck, his beard providing a new sensation that she hadn’t felt before.

The past year was difficult. If they could go back in time and fix it, they would jump on the opportunity without a second thought. But just maybe, it made them stronger. Maybe they needed to begin to wilt in order for them to bloom.

…

“What do we do now?”

Devon curled closer to Luke as a crisp breeze cut through the darkening evening. He sighed and wrapped the blanket tighter around them.

“I’m not sure.”

The couple sat in the trunk of Luke’s car with the door popped open, parked at a lookout point that overlooked the city. It was something they used to do all the time in college. It was comforting to return to their old traditions, knowing that they had fixed what they broke.

It was Sunday evening, the day before Devon flew back to her grad school city. They may have gotten back together, but they were still faced with the same problem as when they broke up. Devon still had a whole year of grad school left, miles away.

“I’m not sure I want to go back,” Devon admitted, eyes fixed on the city lights. Luke snapped his head to look at her, eyebrows furrowed.

“What do you mean? Are you saying you don’t want to finish your degree?”

Luke would never forgive himself if she gave up her master’s degree because of him. He didn’t want the distance either, but he could never hold her back from her dreams.

“No, no, I want to finish. I just...I wasn’t happy in that city. This is my home. I’m happy here,” she explained. She tore her eyes away from the view in favor of looking at her boyfriend. “With you.”

Luke dipped his head down, pressing a kiss to her temple. Devon leaned into the affection that she had missed so much.

“It’s up to you, honey. I don’t want to hold you back. Just know that if you do stay there, I’m going to really try this time. I promise we’ll make it work, and I’ll be here for you no matter what.”

Devon grinned at his words. She didn’t realize how much she needed to hear that; that the past wouldn’t repeat itself. However, she didn’t want to put either of them through the suffering of a long distance relationship when she didn’t even want to be away.

“I appreciate that, bubs. But I just can’t do that to us after everything we’ve been through.” She thought for a moment, trying to decipher the best course of action. “Maybe I could finish online.”

Luke nodded in acknowledgement; it was a good compromise. Devon got to finish her degree at the school with the best program, and she didn’t have to be so far away. It benefitted Luke as well, not just her. However, he didn’t want to sway her either way.

“If that’s what you want, honey. This is your decision.”

He gave her shoulders a squeeze as she thought it over. The only sounds to be heard were the gentle hum of the city below them and the cold breeze that ruffled the trees. It was so familiar. They had spent countless nights like this, simply enjoying each other’s company and rewinding from hectic college life. Luke had to remind himself that they weren’t undergraduate students anymore; Devon was in grad school and he was a published poet.

It was baffling how everything felt like it had gone back to the way it was, yet things were actually so very different.

“That’s what I want,” Devon announced with confidence after a few moments of pondering. “I want to stay here.”

Matching lovesick grins spread across their faces as they locked eyes. She scooted closer to Luke, if that was even possible, nudging her nose against his.

“You’re sure?” He verified, eyes fluttering closed.

“So very sure.”

He chuckled lowly before closing the gap. The air between them was finally clear. Their relationship was fixed and they would still be together. No more pain and suffering.

Devon rested her head on Luke’s shoulder when the kiss broke, breathing out a content sigh. They enjoyed the silence for a moment before Devon piped up with a question.

“Can I move back into the apartment?”

“Of course you can,” Luke chuckled. “That’s our place. Why couldn’t you?”

“What about Ashton?”

“He understands our situation, babe. He saw this coming. He already asked Calum and Michael if he could take the extra bedroom at their flat if it came to this, and they agreed. As long as you’re fine with living with him for a little while until he moves out, then he’s fine with it too.”

Devon let out a breathy laugh, nodding in understanding.

“I mean, I’ll still have to go back to my apartment out there for a bit to get my stuff.” She looked up at Luke with a hopeful glint in her eye. “Do you think you could come with and help? It’s alright if you can’t.”

“I can come, honey. I’ll see if I can fly out with you tomorrow, but if not I can come a couple days later, so you don’t have to change yours.” A smirk spread across his face before continuing. “Or we could just wait to go together and stay here for another few days. You know, catch up a little more.”

Devon laughed and playfully rolled her eyes, nudging his shoulder.

“What a way with words you have, Hemmings. No wonder you’re a poet.”

“Speaking of poetry, I have something for you.”

Luke pressed a swift kiss to Devon’s cheek before hopping out of the trunk. He opened the door to the back seat and rifled around for a moment, then returning to face Devon. He removed his hand from behind his back, holding it out to her.

“For you.”

Devon took the item from his hand curiously. It only took a moment for her to realize what it was.

It was a book titled The Life of a Flower. The cover was a stunning photo of two orchids side by side, and Luke’s name was printed across the bottom.

His first poetry book.

“You’re the first person to get a copy,” he mumbled sheepishly, breaking Devon from her trance of staring at it. She couldn’t help the tears of pride that welled in her eyes. If seeing the actual, physical book in person was such an emotional moment for her, she couldn’t even imagine how Luke must have felt when he saw it for the first time.

“This is incredible, Luke,” she whispered, smiling despite her tears. “I’m so proud of you, bubs, so fucking proud.”

Devon dropped the blanket from her shoulders and hopped down from the trunk. Her arms found their way around his neck while his found her waist. Pride was an understatement. She had been there every step of the way, and seeing his dreams finally come to life was a wonderful sight to see.

“Thank you, Devon,” Luke whispered into her hair. “For being my biggest supporter. I wouldn’t be here without you.”

“It’s not me, Lu,” she mumbled in response, tilting her head up to look at him. “You have a gift. Your writing got you here, not me.”

“I would have given up on writing a long time ago if I didn’t have you. You give me an endless amount of inspiration that I never had before. A poet’s words are meaningless if his muse isn’t worth writing about.”

“Damn. William Shakespeare has nothing on you,” she joked although she was absolutely melting on the inside. Luke groaned playfully.

“You always ruin the moment. Anyway, look at the first pages.”

Devon removed her arms from his neck to flip through, skipping past the title page, copyright and table of contents until she found what he was talking about. She found a dedications page that only made her tear up again, reading:

“For Devon. You’ll always be my orchid.”

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d20owlbear · 4 years ago

Note

Could you tell us more about Aziraphale Swan and his Very Peculiar Neighbor if that’s ok? Thank you

Yeah of course!

So! This one started out as a joke (every damn time I s2g) and has gotten more... well it’s gotten more as time has gone on.

It’s a Twilight AU/fusion thing based off a discord post from @kai-art! Where Aziraphale is entirely unrelated to Bella Swan but has the same last name, moves up in a similarish timeline to Forks, and used to live in Phoenix, AZ. None of this is explained, of course.

There, by chance, he happens to meet one Anthony Crowley, who is a nearby mortician and drives off all the bio waste to Seattle (the nearest disposal... please know I’ve done so much research for this, holy shit, I’m pretty damn sure at this point I’ve done more research for this fanfic than Meyer ever did for Twilight and THEY DON”T HAVE FANGS??? OH MY GOD why?! anyway if anyone wants to see my math on exactly how much blood Twilight vampires need to consume, lmk! cause it’s an unholy amount my fucking god Meyer did you even do any math at all? Christ).

The secondary goal of this fic is to fit as many romance anime tropes in there as possible, particularly shoujo tropes. So far we’ve got the toast in the mouth and being saved by a handsome stranger/pulled into his arms, and we’ve got around 3-4 kabedons planned, tripping during a particularly erotic slow sword fight, and a confession during a festival (this one autumn leaves rather than sakura, but still! the vibe is there but make it PNW).

I’m currently writing ch 3 and wanted to get a good padding of chapters before I started to release anything, but here’s an excerpt!

Aziraphale was moving. Out to the Pacific Northwest of America. Washington state, Forks to be specific. It was small and wooded and there was a lovely little home off on an acre of unfenced woodland, butting up against the back of some place called Fern Acres. He'd gone and picked somewhere wholly isolated, or at least as isolated as he could bear, and put-putted all the way from Arizona in his old, beat up pick-up truck his father had left him. The body of it had been a pretty buttercup yellow at some point he remembered fondly, but had sun-bleached to white in patches and spots like he'd spilled paint all over it. There was a certain sort of charm though, Aziraphale said to himself in order to avoid going to a place like an autobody shop, to have a car with more character than oneself.

Moving interstate was always interesting, wasn't it? It made one a bit of a mystery, coming new into a small, wooded town. Maybe someone would even gossip about him. The very thought of it perked Aziraphale up during his arduous drive all the way up through California (stopping briefly in the famed Wine Country for the night in a lovely little B&B that doubled as a winery, picking up a rundlet of wines. He'd had his heart set on a butt simply to say he'd purchased a literal buttload, though he couldn't justify the expense, nor spare the room amongst things that wouldn't break the bottles).

Aziraphale drove and listened to the music on his staticky little cassette player in the car, a mix tape his father had made so long ago when he'd found out all the kids were doing it to give to their dates. He'd already been married to Aziraphale's mother, but it had been cute, and ever since, his father had used the massive tape deck to build the same playlist every few years to present on their anniversary and wore them into the ground playing them over and over in this old rust-bucket car… Aziraphale sighed and pulled over for a bit when his eyes grew too watery to see the road well enough to drive. Thinking of his parents always seemed to do that, though he hoped the young couple that had purchased his childhood home only half a month ago had that child they were aiming for and it grew up even half as loved as Aziraphale had been.

But! He dashed his sleeve over his face and turned the tape over, even though it wasn't at the end just yet, and set it to play in the middle of the first song on the other side. The passionate refrain of Queen lilted in the car and Aziraphale smiled, though it felt like more of a grimace, and started up the truck again to resume his drive. Queen wasn't his favorite band, but they were certainly up there. Freddie simply had a way with his voice, and how queer so many of the songs were made Aziraphale's heart glad. That and it reminded him of his parents laughing in the kitchen and dancing with spatula or ladle in hand as Aziraphale watched from the kitchen table where he did his homework to the strains of ooh you make me live now honey!

This was slightly all over the place, but if anyone’s interested in any of my research holes for this, my various griefs or Opinions™ about Twilight lore in relation to other vampire lores or want to know more about Crowley (who is clearly a vampire) or Aziraphale (who’s far more interesting than he thinks he is) please let me know! This is one of my more interesting wips I think, if only cause of my wide and varies Opinions™ about all the stuff I’ve had to look at.

See more wip names here if you’re interested and ask me about them!!

#wip meme #my writing #asked and answered #Anonymous

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sentient-stove · 4 years ago

Text

Crashing Down.

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Characters: Logan, c!Thomas Sanders (mentioned), Virgil, Roman, Patton, Remus, Janus, Nico Flores.

Relationships: c!Thomas/Nico, Logan/Nico, Logan&Virgil, Platonic DRLAMP, Roman/Patton

Additional tags: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH (x2), Angst with a happy ending, Sad Logan hours, Homophobia, Protests.

Summary: What if gay marriage was made illegal again? What if you never got the chance to tell the person that you loved that you loved them? What if they were torn from you?

Notes: Hey, gay marriage is actually super close to becoming illegal again in the United States, so catch me being killed because people hate me for who I am. This is a very sad story, but it has a happy ending. enjoy.

AO3

Virgil can’t breathe. There’s a knee pressing into his neck and as he chokes, the leering face of the man looms over him.

God, he doesn’t want this to be the last thing he sees, but his vision is swimming and the way that stars are dancing in his vision reminds him of Logan…

The darkness wins.

…

Logan is at work when he gets the call.

Logan is twenty five when he loses his best friend at a protest.

Logan is twenty five when the world comes crashing down.

It had been something that Virgil had offhandedly brought up that morning, when the two were in bed, using each other as radiators so that they didn’t have to pay for heating. A protest that someone had organized that was directly fighting against the ban on gay marriage that had been reinstated after only being legal for five years. He understood where the anger came from and he promised to meet Virgil there after work.

It never happened.

Instead Logan was asked to identify a body in a morgue. Virgil looked like shit as a dead man, the dark circles under his eyes matching in a horrible way with the strangulation marks on his neck.

He didn’t cry. Not until he was knocking on his brother’s door, falling into the arms of Patton and sobbing as his older brother easily lifted him and carried him to the couch. Logan lets himself be hugged, even if it isn’t what he wants, it’s what he needs in the moment, someone to hug him and whisper lies that everything will be okay.

But it’s not. Patton can’t marry his husband, (they were married but it was nullified after gay marriage was banned), and Logan is alone.

Gosh, it’s only been seven hours and he misses Virgil more than anything. Roman came in sometime during the crying fest and joined the pile, simply giving Logan a knowing look.

The protest wasn’t supposed to get violent. That man wasn’t supposed to try to kill that girl and Virgil wasn’t supposed to push him away, knowing that he was fighting a losing battle.

According to the people that managed to pull the guy off of Virgil, his best friend’s last words were along the lines of telling the dude to fuck himself with a hot iron.

It’s fitting.

…

Would it be lying to say that it snowed the day of the funeral? Janus looked up at the sleet that was coming down, tilting his umbrella back just enough to catch some in his face.

His brother had always wanted to be cremated and then scattered in a Walmart parking lot at the witching hour, and so here they are at three am, scattering ashes like how Virgil wanted. Twins were weird that way. Janus never felt like they were related, but Virgil had always loved the strange and obscure, almost the exact opposite of himself.

Logan hasn’t said a word for a week and it scares Janus. He knew that the pair were close, but this was concerning.

The ashes blend well with the sleet, disappearing as each take a turn to scatter some. Janus saved the last bit, and the others pretended not to notice.

…

Patton finds the journal when they’re cleaning out the small apartment that Logan used to share with Virgil.

It’s tucked under the floorboards, it’s really a miracle that he stumbled on it and when he opens it, he can see Virgil’s beautiful cursive filling every page.

Who knew the emo could write so pretty? The journal itself is not that old, the first date from less than six months ago. Each page has a snippet from his life and it’s the words on the last page that prompt Patton to fresh tears.

I think I’ll tell Logan tomorrow. Ask him if maybe… after all this is over, maybe he’ll go out on a date with me?

The entry was three days before he died.

Patton doesn’t show Logan the journal when his brother comes back into the room to carry out a box. The timing isn’t right and Logan is still fragile, barely eating, barely speaking.

…

Roman sat across from the man who did it, the man who’s now in cuffs, blank stare boring into his soul.

“Why?” “He was in the way.”

Roman refrains from showing any emotion, although if there wasn’t a pane of glass between them, he’d beat the man until he was black and blue for what he did.

“Do you regret it.”

“Yes.”

“But not for the reasons you should.”

…

It’s Remus who finds Logan one night. Both of them are on the wrong side of the bridge railing, tempting fate.

“I miss him.” Logan admits softly. Remus doesn’t blame him. It’s been three months since the funeral and so much has changed. Roman and Patton are married again, Janus disappeared to Italy and has yet to send out another text confirming if he’s alive and Remus?

He finds Logan. He takes Logan home and helps him eat, helps him stay alive as the world tunnels for the nerd.

He misses Virgil.

But he moves on. Remus doesn’t dwell on things for long, it’s part of the reason why Virgil called him heartless as a joke. It rings false, they both knew it.

Logan was his first friend. They had met in high school, back before Virgil was in the picture. Logan had found Remus on a bridge like this. He’d sat down and coaxed Remus back over the right edge, concern lacing his voice as he talked him through his intrusive thoughts. Logan had later met Virgil and the three became unstoppable senior year of high school.

Remus knows that Logan misses that feeling.

Because he does too.

…

Logan is under his covers when the package arrives, addressed to him in flowing cursive.

It’s Virgil’s handwriting, he’s seen it enough times on the grocery lists that they put together.

It’s a simple bracelet.

Logan didn’t realize that it was Valentine’s day until almost a week later, when he went to the post office to mail a letter and the mailperson processing the letter asked if he got the package okay.

Apparently Virgil had set up the package almost a year in advance, hoping to have forgotten by the time Valentine’s rolled around so his friend could have a surprise.

Logan went home and sobbed for an hour after.

…

Janus returns, a new scar cutting across his cheek and a tattoo on the back of his neck that is a simple padlock with a lightning bolt on it.

He brings with him a delicate glass blown pendant. The glass was mixed with the leftover of Virgil’s ashes and he gave it to Logan.

It rests against Logan’s heartbeat and he pretends to be okay even though everything is crashing down.

…

Virgil’s murderer is released from prison. He later kills another gay man at a protest and is given the death penalty.

It’s too merciful.

…

Logan turns twenty six. He doesn’t celebrate.

…

Patton gives Logan the journal one day, on a whim when Logan asks if he can help with cooking the anniversary dinner for when Roman and Patton got remarried.

…

Logan is twenty seven when he meets Nico in a mall. They ran into each other- literally and at a later time, he finds out that Nico lost someone too.

Virgil and Thomas.

It’s strange how you lose the ones you love the most.

Together, they pick up the broken pieces and struggle forward.

…

Logan is thirty when he becomes Logan Flores.

Later, after the wedding reception, he’ll hold his husband close and promise, no, vow to always be there for him.

They fall asleep tangled together and everything seems to click back into place. For Logan, he still feels like a vase that's been shattered at a teenager's party, but he's slowing fixing himself, slowly getting better.

…

Sometimes you lose your first love.

Sometimes it snows and you think of them.

Sometimes you pretend that it's okay.

Sometimes everything comes crashing down.

Sometimes it gets fixed.

This is one of those times.

#sanders sides #sanders sides spoilers #ts spoilers #virgil sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #analogical #patton sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #c!thomas #Nico Flores #royality #homophobia in the story #character death #sanders sides fic

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dreamsofnude · 4 years ago

Text

An Ode to a Past Love

This is the hardest thing I will ever write.

It started a little more than six years ago. I met you at a concert in Philadelphia. I didn’t think much of you then. You followed me around all day with those big blue eyes and I thought nothing of it. You annoyed me actually.

You were persistent, and I liked that about you. You annoyed me, but you had so many traits that I admired. You were easy to talk to. You were kind. You knew how to make me laugh. We shared similar interests and values. But of course, you were just a friend.

Your entire existence conflicted with what I wanted in life; with who I wanted in life. You were wild and had experienced so much in just 18 years. You didn’t want to settle. I was 19 and in my first year of college, and didn’t know what my future held. I had a very clear idea in my head of the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. You weren’t it.

You were always persistent. Despite how busy I was working and going to class, day after day we would text, talk on the phone, Facetime, send each other Tweets, and so on. There was never a time where we weren’t connected. I loved to hate that about us.

I turned 20 and decided I wanted an adventure. You were in bootcamp in North Chicago and I suggested that I would come visit. I had never traveled on my own. You agreed, and we made arrangements. Little did I know, that this would be the trip that ruined me forever.

I got on the plane, full of excitement and butterflies. I didn’t know why I was feeling them. I was just going to visit a friend; nothing major. We were going to meet downtown at Ogilvie Station. I got lost trying to find it. When I first saw you exit the train platform doors, we ran up toward one another and embraced each other with a force and closeness I had never felt — and that is when my life changed.

I didn’t know what was in store for us. I didn’t know that our first kiss was going to be on the top of the ferris wheel at Navy Pier that night. I didn’t know that we would spend the evening tangled in that hotel room bed. I didn’t know what was happening, and honestly, I didn’t care. I was happy. For once in my life, I felt happy.

I went back to Pennsylvania, and you went back to bootcamp. You got assigned to be in San Diego a month later. The distance between us just got larger, but I didn’t care. I wanted it to work.

You came back to Pennsylvania before they sent you to San Diego, and I promised I would drive 3 hours to see you. I will never forget that day. Unfortunately, it would be the last time I saw you for a few years.

We continuously found ourselves in a rigorous cat-and-mouse game for the years to follow. I would date someone; you would talk to me. You would date someone; I would talk to you. When it failed on both ends, we talked to one another. I didn’t mind it though, because we always found our way back to each other again.

I was in my last year of college. You called me one December night, drunk out of your mind. You confessed your love for me. You said “I want you from the beginning to the very end.” Though it didn’t make sense, I knew what you meant, and the cycle started all over again.

We decided to plan a visit after 3 years of not seeing each other. I flew to San Diego to spend 10 days with you in your apartment on the naval base. It was the new start with you I had craved for years.

We got a little drunk one night and got carried away. I found out two months later that I was pregnant. We agreed on an abortion. I want to say more about this but it’s hard for me to put it all into words. It still haunts me to this day.

I asked you if I could move to San Diego to be with you after I graduated college. I wanted us to finally be in the same place at the same time. You told me no. Later I found out it’s because you had a local girlfriend that you didn’t want me to know about.

At 23, I decided to move to Chicago after graduation and have a new start. I wanted to be with you but you still had a few years left in the Navy, and you didn’t want me to be in San Diego. I figured, Chicago was where we got our start, why not go there and make it our forever?

You told me you were afraid of me. You said you were afraid of how much I loved you, and how much you loved me. You said you were afraid of how intense and serious our connection was. You confessed to the secret local girlfriend that I had my suspicions about, but said you didn’t want to be with anyone else ever again. We finally made it official and started dating. I shouldn’t have forgiven you then, but I did. I should have hated you then, but I didn’t.

Things were rough because of the distance, but one thing was certain: the love we had for each other was on fire. We were wildly passionate about one another. We made several trips back and forth to see each other, but each time left us with wanting more. I have come to learn from this situation that sometimes just loving someone so much is not enough.

I always had my suspicions about your girl best friend. I knew in my gut she liked you, and that she always had. You denied these statements every time I made them.

You asked me in April if she could move in with you and your other roommate because there was an opening and her lease was up. I was not keen on the idea. I believe I said no several times because of how uncomfortable it made me feel. Truth be told, I didn’t trust her. I knew she would try something. Eventually I gave in, and said she could, but that there would be some ground rules in terms of what questions I could ask in order to ease my mind and reassure me with her being around. As I’m sure you recall, there wasn’t much reason for me to trust you either.

We broke up in May — two weeks after I resigned my lease for the apartment you were supposed to live in with me. I was now stuck by myself in a city that I hated. I hated the lifestyle. I hated the people. I hated the apartment that I once loved. I hated everything, but somehow I didn’t hate you.

We kept in touch, constantly actually. You still called and texted me every day. We still told each other about our days. We were both unprepared for what was to come.

My mental health started to decline rapidly. My therapist wanted to admit me to in-patient therapy, but I didn’t have the money. You sent it to me so that I could get the help I needed.

Time went on. I got a little better. I was released from the in-patient facility, and quickly started acting out. I was doing drugs and partying a lot, and you stuck to your reserved roots. We still talked every day. You were concerned, but just wanted me to have fun and feel free. I took advantage of that. I’m 25 years old and still sulking over my ex-boyfriend, so what better way to cope with the loss than with partying and drugs?

You came back to Pennsylvania for the holidays, and I promised I would drive 3 hours to see you, just like I had done years before. I will never forget that day. It was the first time I had seen you in person since we broke up.

We spent the day together in Harrisburg; we went to the bookstore and the coffee shop, walked around the city, and sat on the swings at the park. I asked you about a photo of you and your roommate that looked very couple-like that was on Instagram, and I said, “You know how this looks, right?” You denied and said that it was just because your other roommate didn’t want to be in the photo.

As the sun started to set and I knew I needed to make my journey back home, I felt so strongly in my gut that I didn’t want to leave you. I would rather die than be apart from you again.

I dropped you off at your cousin’s house. We didn’t even hug goodbye. We were both hesitant to leave but knew it’s what we had to do. I started to drive away, and not even 30 seconds down the street I started hysterically crying. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t see. I called a friend to calm me down and he said “You need to tell him, Lydia!” — so I did.

I texted you and told you I was crying. I said how I regretted not hugging you goodbye. You replied almost instantly and said “I regret not kissing you, so there’s that.” I abruptly turned the car around and headed back toward you.

I picked you back up and you kissed me immediately. I hate to say it but my soul left my body with that kiss. I had craved it for so long. I had craved you for so long. We couldn’t stop so we drove to a clearing in the woods. You know the rest. You played Heavenly by Cigarettes After Sex as I drove you back to your cousin’s house.

I started on my 3 hour drive home that night, intoxicated from your kiss and the connection that we built once again. I didn’t know that would be the last time I saw you.

Time went on, and things were good. You said how you wished you could come home to me. We talked about visiting each other again, but you were unsure of the timing because you were trying to start a new job. We were desperate to make it work; well, at least I was.

You started to grow distant. I asked you about it several times. I asked you if there was someone else. You told me you just were afraid of hurting me again. You said there was no one else.

Valentine’s Day rolled around, which is a particularly hard time for me because that is the anniversary of the abortion I had for what would have been our child. The day was already off to a rough start. I had a disgusting gut feeling that something was going to happen that day, but I tried to brush it off.

I happened to look at your roommate’s Instagram story and saw a post of beautiful flowers on the table in your home, captioned “Thank you my love,” with you tagged on the image. I ran to the bathroom and threw up. My worst nightmare had come true.

I asked you about it, you initially denied and said how the two of you talked about needing more plants in the house so you thought buying her those flowers would be a nice gesture. On Valentine’s Day? You always thought I was a fool. I knew you were lying. Sparing the details, you eventually confessed to having been with her for quite some time.

I know that my actions were toxic as a response to trauma, and for that there is no excuse. However, my intentions were never evil or to hurt you. I was lost. I was hurting. I was dealing with the greatest loss I had ever experienced. I was fighting for my life, and my mental illnesses were winning.

I said I wanted to come to San Diego. In the heat of the moment, I did not express the intentions of that statement clearly. I really just wanted to come to talk to you in person and explain everything that I had done, face-to-face, so we could fix it. But, it was interpreted as a threat. Now, I sit here with a 3-year restraining order.

I left out so many details from our story as I find them to be sacred — for you and me only. I have done a lot of terrible things to you, as you have done a lot of terrible things to me. We can’t take back what has already happened. I just wish you wouldn’t have given up.

Time has gone on and I’ve grown so much as a person. I have learned to deal with my mental illnesses more proactively. I’m finally doing things that make me happy. I’m leaving this city I hate to move somewhere I actually want to be. I am living for me now, not for you. I hope you’ve changed for the better, too.

There are so many things that I would go back and relive if I could, as well as go back and change. Surprisingly, I wouldn’t turn you back into a stranger. But, I didn’t know that was our inevitable outcome.

The last time we spoke was March 14th. Don’t worry, I’m not counting or anything.

This is the hardest thing I will ever write. I hope you read it.

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paralleljulieverse · 4 years ago

Photo

Darling Lili in New York, or Where Were You the Night Julie Andrews Played Radio City Music Hall and Stole Manhattan’s Heart?

This is the second in a series of commemorative posts to mark the 50th anniversary of Darling Lili, the last of the 1960s Julie Andrews screen musicals. In the preceding post, we looked at the film’s fraught production history up to and including its World Premiere at Hollywood’s Cinerama Dome on 23 June 1970. Here, we turn attention to the film’s New York bow which took place a month later on 23 July at the city’s fabled Radio City Music Hall.

Nicknamed “the show place of the nation”, Radio City Music Hall was for much of the mid-twentieth century the venue of choice for big event film releases. The theatre’s monumental size, architectural opulence, state-of-the-art technology, and pre-show stage spectacles made it “the quintessential motion picture palace,” and Hollywood studios jockeyed to secure bookings at “the Hall” for their most prestigious pictures (Goldman, 97-98).

During the late-60s, Paramount, the studio behind Darling Lili, enjoyed a run of extremely successful summer bookings at Radio City Music Hall. Its 1967 release, Barefoot in the Park broke house records for the longest run at the Hall with a 12-week season, only to be bested the following year by another Paramount comedy, The Odd Couple which ran for 14-weeks (”Trouble”, 114). It was something of a PR coup, therefore, when, in January 1970, Paramount announced with much fanfare that Darling Lili would make its official premiere as the summer attraction at Radio City Music Hall later in the year (”Par Gets”, 3). The deal even made the front cover of Boxoffice magazine with a photo of Frank Yablans, Paramount general sales manager, proudly signing the booking contract with Music Hall president, James F. Gould (″Sign of Summer,”, cover).

Barely had the ink dried on the deal, however, when Paramount changed tack. Hit by the toughest industry recession in decades and spooked by a precipitous downturn in the market for big-budget roadshow films, Paramount execs implemented a wholesale revision of studio operations, including a brutal hard-prune of their production and release schedules (Dick, 120ff). By April, earlier plans to give Darling Lili a high profile release had been ditched and, in its stead, Paramount decided to offload the film cheaply as part of a bundle of eight titles slated for saturation release during the summer off-season. Dubbed the “Big Summer Playoff,” the aim was to issue the films widely and quickly so that they could “saturate every major and minor market with single-house firstruns and key city multiples” (“Paramount’s Summer Playoff”, 5). In an era when important films were typically given carefully staggered roll-outs, it was an unorthodox move that fuelled advance perceptions of Darling Lili as a bomb of such magnitude that even its own studio had lost hope. As one newspaper commentator put it, Paramount “seems to have dumped the expensive movie rather than spend any more on it” (Taylor, 21-E).

Radio City Music Hall, by contrast, stuck to its original plans to exhibit Darling Lili as a high-profile summer spectacular. With Paramount having started to issue the film haphazardly to theatres across the nation in June, the opening of Darling Lili at Radio City on July 23 would no longer be a world premiere -- that honour was hastily devolved to Hollywood’s Cinerama Dome -- but the Hall persisted in proudly billing its run as “the New York premiere”. As Variety wryly noted: “Music Hall has never played a pic which hasn’t been a New York first, although perhaps someone there thought the tourists may have thought Lili was otherwise in that the film opened nationally a month ago” (”New York”, 20).

While not strictly a roadshow presentation, Radio City Music Hall exhibited Darling Lili with all the trappings of a hardticket prestige release. Seats were available via a mix of both premium reserved and general admission with special complimentary programs issued to patrons at all sessions. The theatre screened the film in wide-gauge 70mm with 6-track stereophonic sound, one of only two US venues to do so. Projected on the Hall’s 70′x40′ motion picture screen -- the largest indoor screen in the world at the time -- the film would have looked and sounded amazing (Goldman, 99). As an added point of appeal, screenings were supported by one of the Hall‘s famous live stage entertainments: in this case, a Spanish-themed spectacular with symphony orchestra, flamenco dancers, guitarists and, of course, the legendary high-kicking Rockettes (Jose, 54). In addition, the Hall lavished Darling Lili with a solid promotional buildup, taking out full page ads in key newspapers, and using strategically-placed billboards and transit ads around town.

It was an old-school approach of event-style cinema showmanship that paid off handsomely. Even before Darling Lili opened at the Hall, there was “an unprecedented advance demand” for tickets, leading the theatre to double the number of reserved seats from 900 to 1,800 for all sessions. “We’ve added reserve seats on a few occasions previously,” observed a theatre rep, but “only during the heavily crowded Christmas and Easter holiday seasons” and never...during the summer,” adding that he had “no idea” what had generated the extraordinary advance demand (Weiler, 37).

The good news continued when the film opened on July 23 with a box-office rush that broke all house records, prompting the theatre to increase reserve bookings even further to 2500 seats in an effort to accommodate the clamour for tickets (“’Lili’ Hitting Peak,” E-2). As Variety commented:

“Radio City’s Darling Lili...is the summer blockbuster all the auspices hoped it would be, with $285,000 or close expected for kickoff session. Pic is curious in that its longtime postproduction shelving had spurred rumors of disastrous artistic results. But film has shown legs in crosscountry openings and both critical and word-of-mouth opinion in Manhattan has been mixed at worst. Some response is downright enthusiastic” (“’Lili’ and Revue,” 9).

Darling Lili continued its bullish box-office run in New York, long after any initial novelty buzz should have subsided. Weekly grosses inched higher for a few weeks before settling into a very healthy $200K+ per week plateau. Come mid-August, Variety noted with thinly-veiled surprise that:

“Radio City Music Hall is experiencing a slight phenomenon with its current Darling Lili attraction. It’s not unusual during the summer tourist season for popular Hall programs to maintain or build grosses...but few remain in such a narrow range as has Lili to date. First week tally of $280,000 was a non-holiday record. Second was upped to $288,000. Now third session is headed for $280,000....70mm projection and sound are plus-values in a package which Hall president James Gould predicts will run until late September” (“N.Y. Full,” 9).

In the end Darling Lili did run at Radio City Music Hall until late-September -- September 23, to be precise -- when it closed to make way for the pre-booked Sophia Loren-vehicle, Sunflower. Across its 9-week run, the film grossed in excess of $2million in ticket sales, making it one of the theatre’s biggest summer hits to date (“Picture Grosses,” 15).

The commercial success of Darling Lili at the Hall was music to the ears of the film’s star who, in a rare moment of unguarded hubris, admitted to a measure of self-satisfaction at news of the booming box office receipts:

“‘I’m not so interested for myself,’ she explained, ‘but I’m happy for Blake. He has been so maligned about this picture that I am delighted he is receiving some vindication...I think he managed to make a vastly enjoyable film...People are entertained by it; the Music Hall figures seem to prove that.’ [T]he actress had mild reproof for the releasing company, Paramount, over its handling of the film: ‘Three weeks before the opening, there was no advertising campaign. None whatsoever. Paramount didn’t seem to know how it was going to sell the picture--or if. I simply can’t understand an attitude like that’” (Thomas: 13).

Julie’s chiding of Paramount for its poor handling of Darling Lili was not mere sour grapes. Once the studio had decided to issue the film as part of a summer saturation bundle, it effectively abandoned any semblance of cogent or even halfway organised marketing. As outlined in our earlier post, there was little rationale to the film’s distribution. Lili appeared suddenly and briefly at second-run theatres and drive-ins across disparate suburban and provincial areas, while major metropolitan venues didn’t get the film till much later, if at all. In many markets, the film was booked for a fleeting season of a week or two – in some cases, just a few days -- and it was frequently paired as a double-bill with a host of poorly selected partner titles (Caen, 6-B).

The studio’s approach to promotion was no better. A generic pressbook and merchandising manual was issued, but it was very bare-bones and perfunctory. In the absence of a clear marketing plan, local exhibitors were left to promote the film more or less any way they liked. Advertisements were frequently altered to pitch Darling Lili in diverse, and often contradictory, ways. The main advertising art provided by Paramount -- with its central image of Julie in mid-song set within a sepia frame of art nouveau swirls -- positioned the film principally as a nostalgic star musical with touches of adult romance. Many local exhibitors took a very different approach. Some tried to reframe it as wholesome child-friendly fare: “This summer’s one and only total family entertainment;” “It’s Julie at her best! It’s for your family” (“This Summer,” 24). Other theatres pegged it as “a man’s movie,” stressing the action and warfare elements with taglines like “See the Best Dogfights of World War I” or “If you enjoyed Blue Max you’ll love Darling Lili” (“Man’s Movie”, 13; “Palms”, 64). Some exhibitors even openly recycled graphics from The Blue Max and other WW1 action films, with one Florida venue going so far as to revive the film’s original working title: Darling Lili, or Where Were You the Night You Said You Shot Down Baron Von Richtofen? (“Amusements,” 11A).

Elsewhere, exhibitors implemented a rash of dubious promotional incentives such as “twofers” or free entry to "one child under 12...with the purchase of one adult admission to Darling Lili” (“Capri”, 2D). A theatre in Fort Lauderdale offered “free admission to World War I veterans in uniform during matinees Monday through Friday” (“’Darling Lili’ Ducats,” 5D). Possibly well-intentioned gestures but it was bottom-barrel marketing that fostered an unfortunate aura of abject desperation around the film that likely turned off more patrons than it enticed.

Against this sorry backdrop of shambolic distribution and ham-fisted marketing, the meticulous handling of Darling Lili at Radio City Music Hall served as a strikingly singular counterpoint. The remarkable commercial success of the film at that venue -- which, if reported figures are to be believed, represented well over a third of the film’s entire US grosses (“US Films,” 184) -- can only be attributed in good part to the care and professionalism with which the Hall managed the film’s exhibition. One can’t help but wonder, therefore, how different the overall commercial fate of Darling Lili might have been had Paramount exercised a more discriminating distribution plan, affording the film the kind of special-event release it enjoyed in New York. It’s unlikely Lili would ever have been a major hit -- it was simply too narrow in appeal and out-of-step with the rapidly changing times -- but it certainly could have gone much further in recouping costs and might even have realised a modest profit. At a minimum, it would have helped redeem the film from its unjust reputation as the “Edsel that almost bankrupted Paramount Pictures” (Rosenfield, 5).

As a coda to this account of the exceptional history of Darling Lili at the Radio City Music Hall, it is interesting to note that the film fared well in New York not just commercially but also critically, Some of the film’s best US reviews came from New York critics -- a surprising turn-of-events given how notoriously hostile the East Coast critical establishment had been to Julie Andrews’ earlier screen musicals. Wanda Hale of the New York Daily News gave Darling Lili three-and-a-half stars out of four, writing:

“Radiantly beautiful, elegantly turned out, Julie Andrews graces Radio City Music Hall in a burst of song and dance, adventure and romance...[I]t’s Darling Lili everybody loves, so will you, you Music Hall patrons--you and the family” (Hale, 39).

Vincent Canby (1970) of the New York Times found Darling Lili “a pure if not perfect comedy” with “a lot of perverse charm and real cinematic beauty.” He continued:

“Although Julie Andrews (the film, not stage, star) has always struck me as a very mitigated delight, she may be the perfect centerpiece for this sort of fantasy. That is, her angular, aggressive profile, combined with her coolness and precision as a comedienne and a singer, give the immediate, comic lie to the adventures of a supposedly irresistible femme fatale. She thus is immensely funny...” (16).

In a rare honour, the New York Times afforded Darling Lili a second review from Roger Greenspan (1970) who argued for the film as a minor masterpiece of refined, borderline philosophical, sensibilities. “[O]ne very bright critic I know...has already compared the film, ecstatically, with Max Ophul’s great Lola Montes,” he remarked before launching into his own rhapsodic paean:

“To her characterisation, Miss Andrews brings a precision of gesture that matches Edwards’s directorial precision and that constitutes one of the most excitingly controlled expressions of theatrical presence I have ever seen in a movie. Not cold; elegant, finely drawn, perfect of its period--and yet inward, self-sustaining, as if already committed to that gorgeously contemplative state of transport that is the subject of the movie within the movie to look for in Darling Lili” (S2-10).

In a similar move, the inaugural issue of the New York-based cinephile journal, On Film devoted not one but two essay-tributes to Darling Lili from Stuart Byron and Mike Prokosch respectively. The former gushed:

“Darling Lili comes at the end of the big-budget musical cycle, and it [is] one of the only...good things to come out of the whole rotten effort to reduplicate The Sound of Music. But in any case, a masterpiece it is--Blake Edwards’ most beautiful film to date and surely his most meaningful. ... Edwards is the first director to utilise Julie Andrews’ full resources. Her rapid manner of speaking becomes the neutral fulcrum of her moods--it is sincerity hiding danger, or bitterness hiding love. Her singing, however tender on the surface, always gives the impression of concealing a quick intelligence ready to spring forth when needed” (Byron 1970, 31, 34).

Prokosch (1970) was equally smitten, calling Darling Lili “the only work of art Hollywood ha[s] released in 1970″:

“First. one must forget one’s preconceptions of Julie Andrews and look at the way Blake Edwards, the film’s director, casts his wife with remarkable shrewdness: Lili Smith is a young British singer caught in a situation she cannot master. What more natural part could Julie Andrews want? ... Darling Lili is really gutsy in its formal expression...Edwards’ control of the...formal means at his disposal--stylized lighting and colour, split-up background compositions, and especially cutting--displays a...complete knowledge of their emotional effect. What makes Darling Lili unique among recent releases, though, is its careful structuring. Almost every sequence...takes a clear place in the design of the film” (96).

If it sounds like these critics were a little woozy on the then new wine of auteur film theory, a measure of sobriety was served by none other than Andrew Sarris, chief architect of American auteurism, who filed a somewhat more reserved, but nevertheless appreciative, review of Darling Lili for the Village Voice:

“Darling Lili is cinema a la folie, a rhapsody of romantic madness amid the current cacophony of absurdist dissonances, a sentimental valentine from Blake Edwards to Julie Andrews complete with gypsy violins and a Snoopy sub-plot about the Red Baron and the Dawn Patrol...but I’m afraid it won’t work for most audiences on any level. Its ingredients -- romance, satire, musical comedy, deadpan farce -- mix without blending. The song numbers don’t soar high enough and the prats don’t fall hard enough. But Darling Lili is never less than likeable, and its graceful professionalism is especially refreshing in this long hot summer of assorted crudities” (Sarris 1970, 47).

Despite his reservations, Sarris still included Darling Lili in his end-of-year list of the best films of 1970 -- as did several other Village Voice critics: Stuart Byron, Richard Corliss, Stephen Gottlieb, and William Paul (Sarris 1971, 59).

Now, if only the critics and audiences west of the Hudson had shown Darling Lili half-as-much love as the crowds at New York’s Radio City Music Hall, who knows how different the course of Hollywood history -- or at least that of the Julie Andrews screen musical -- might have been...

Sources:

“Amusements Today.” Florida Today. 2 October 1970: 11A.

Byron, Stuart. “Darling Lili.” On Film. 1: 1, 1970: 30-34.

Caen, Herb. “It’s News to Me.” Hartford Sentinel. 5 August 1970: 6-B.

Canby, Vincent. “Screen: ‘Darling Lili’ Sets the Stage for Pure Comedy of Romantic gestures.” New York Times. 24 July 1970: 16.

“Capri: Florentines! Something Wonderful! Has Happened to the Movies!” Florence Morning News. 12 August 1970: 2-A.

“‘Darling Lili’ Ducats Pared for Retirees.” Fort Lauderdale News and Sun-Sentinel. 27 June 1970: 5D.

Dick, Bernard F. Engulfed: The Death of Paramount Pictures and the Birth of Corporate Hollywood. Louisville, KY: University of Kentucky Press, 2001.

Francisco, Charles. The Radio City Music Hall: An Affectionate History of the World's Greatest Theater. New York: E.P. Dutton, 1979.

Goldman, Harry. “Radio City Music Hall.” Journal of American Culture. 1 1, Spring 1978: 96-111.

Greenspan. Roger. “Oh! What a Lovely Spy.” New York Times. 9 August 1970: S2-1, 10.

Hale, Wanda. “Darling Julie Sparkles as Musical Spy.” Daily News. 24 July 1970: 57.

Jose, “House Review: Music Hall N.Y.” Variety. 29 July 1970: 54.

“’Lili’ and Revues, Tally Darling 285G.” Variety. 29 July 1970: 9.

“’Lili’ Hitting Peak.” Boxoffice. 10 August 1970: E-2.

“Man’s Movie.” Winona Daily News. 7 August 1970: 13.

“N.Y. Full of Tourists; Divided Between ‘Darling’ and ‘Denmark’.” Variety. 12 August 1970: 9.

“New York Sound Track.” Variety. 29 July 1970: 20.

“Palms Advertisement.” Arizona Republic. 31 July 1970: 64.

“Par Gets Hall’s Summer Spot for its ‘Darling Lili’.” Variety. 21 January 1970: 3.

“Paramount’s Summer Playoff Strategy: 5,000 Bookings for Eight Major Films.” Variety. 3 June 1970: 5.

“Picture Grosses: Broadway.” Variety. 23 September 1970: 15.

Prokosch, Mike. “On Film/Feature Film: Darling Lili.” On Film. 1: 1, 1970: 96-97.

“Radio City Music Hall’s All-Time Boxoffice Darling.” Variety. 5 August 1970: 12.

Rosenfield, Paul. “Reconcilable Differences.” Los Angeles Times-Calendar. 12 July 1987: 4-5.

Sarris, Andrew. “Films In Focus: ‘Darling Lili’.” The Village Voice. 13 August 1970: 47, 52.

________. “Films In Focus” The Village Voice. 21 January 1971: 59.

“Sign of Summer.” Boxoffice. 26 January 1970: cover.

Taylor, Robert. “‘Lili’ Can Be Charming.” Oakland Tribune. 27 June 1970: 21-E.

“This Summer’s One and Only Total Family Entertainment.” Tucson Daily Citizen. 5 August 1970: 24

Thomas, Bob. “Julie Andrews Praises ‘Lili’.” Courier-News. 15 September 1970: 13.

“Trouble in Paradise.” Newsweek. 25 October 1971: 113-115.

“U.S. Films’ Share-of-Market Profile.” Variety. 12 May 1971: 36-38, 122, 171-174, 178-179, 182-183, 186-187, 190-191, 205-206.

Weiler, A.H. “Big ‘Darling Lili’ Advance.” New York Times. 23 June 1970: 37.

#julie andrews #Darling Lili #blake edwards #radio city music hall #old hollywood #musicals #film premiere #new york #1970

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sushigirlali · 5 years ago

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“I miss you, but then i remember what an asshole you are and the feeling fades.” - Dramione 😘

Prompt: “I miss you, but then I remember what an asshole you are and the feeling fades.”

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Hermione Granger [Dramione]

Continuity: Post Epilogue AU

Rating: T+

A/N: I’m back on my Dramione bullshit thanks to my wifey, so here’s a quick drabble set after the DH Epilogue. This fic also takes Cursed Child into account, so Astoria has passed away and Rose, Scorpius, and Hugo are all at Hogwarts where my story picks up. Enjoy!

——————

For: @grlie-girl

Love: sushigirlali

Life Goes On

——————

Reading the same paragraph for the fifth time in as many minutes, the Minister of Magic attempted to reconcile her feelings about the brief, yet life alternating, Ministry missive she’d received earlier this morning. It had taken her until lunch time to pluck up the courage to read it, and now that she had, Hermione felt conflicted.

On the one hand, she was glad to have one less thing to worry about with her reelection campaign coming up, not to mention her impending nuptials, but on the other, she knew this letter meant her life would never be the same. “But then, life goes on, I suppose.”

Giving the official looking piece of parchment a sad but relieved smile, Hermione set it aside moments before an urgent knock sounded at her office door. “Come in,” she called, composing her features in what she hoped was an authoritative air. “Parvati, do you have-oh! Draco!”

“Hey, lover,” Draco Malfoy sang as shut the door behind him. “This a good time?”

“I was just thinking about you, actually,” she beamed at the widower, springing up from her favorite wingback chair to greet him. “I’ve got a few minutes before Parvati arrives with my revised speech for Harry’s benefit next week.”

“Always working,” he tutted. “And here I was going to invite you to lunch.”

“Sorry,” she said sheepishly, “you know how it is.”

“I do,” he agreed, stopping less than a foot away from her. “Hi.”

“Hi,” she responded a little breathlessly. It had been nearly a fortnight since she’d seen him last and her Draco-starved senses were reeling. “How are you?”

“Better now,” he said, eyeing her conservative black robes and loose bun. “Did you wear those on purpose?”

“These old things?” Hermione indicated her plain outfit with an incredulous laugh.

“Those old things,” he purred, snaking an arm around her waist and pulling her flush against his chest. “Your ensemble reminds me of all the times I hid behind the library stacks and drooled over you at school.”

“You did not!”

“Believe me, love, I most certainly did.”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “I guess I’ve finally discovered your secret kink, then: bookworms who can’t dress.”

“Absolutely,” he confirmed, “but only if the bookworm is you.”

“Okay, Romeo, cool your jets,” she replied, hands fluttering a little nervously against the front of his exquisitely tailored robes. “I need to tell you something before we lose our heads.”

“And here I thought you were good at multitasking,” he teased.

“Is that a challenge?” she said playfully, looking up at him from under her lashes.

“Definitely not,” Draco chuckled. “We both know I’m no match for you.”

“No?” Hermione brushed her lips against his despite herself. “Are you sure? Feels like we’re a pretty good match to me.”

“Hermione,” Draco muttered, “you were going to tell me something…” but he trailed off when she slipped her tongue into his mouth.

She’d never really thought of herself as a sexual person before Draco. She’d slept with Ron while they were together, sure, she had two kids to show for it, but sex was never central to their relationship. “Which is probably why we didn’t work out in the end,” Hermione mused. But things were different with Draco, and she couldn’t be more grateful.

“Was I?” she said coyly when they parted. “You’re much too distracting, Mr. Malfoy. I don’t know if I can concentrate long enough to tell you anything. Maybe we should kiss some more and see if it jog my memory.”

“You’re the one who’s distracting,” he accused, pressing his forehead to hers. “I couldn’t get you out of my head the entire time I was away.”

“Yeah?” she said playfully, butting her nose against his. “Did you think about me at night when you were all alone in your hotel room? I thought about you.”

Seemingly unable to help himself, Draco turned his head to capture her lips, murmuring, “Every night, baby. Every night,” between kisses. “Merlin, I’ve missed you.”

“Mmm, good,” she moaned, looping her arms around his neck as passion exploded between them once again. They’d been together for over a year, but kissing Draco felt like the first time, every time.

After separating from Ron a few years ago, she’d been reluctant to put herself out there again. She had her children to consider, along with her position at the Ministry, so it seemed more prudent to remain independent and unattached for a while. Still, she’d be lying if she said the sudden void in her life had been easy to fill.

Despite splitting from Ron under relatively amicable circumstances, the whole ordeal had put a strain on her relationship with the Weasleys, leading to intense loneliness on her part and apparent indifference on theirs. It was a shame, really, considering how many years they’d spent together as a family, but she tried not to be bitter about it for Rose and Hugo’s sake.

And then there was Draco. Her old Hogwarts rival had come up on her blindside last summer and they’d been inseparable ever since.

“Hermione,” Draco panted after a few tumultuous minutes, drawing away to catch his breath. “Not that I’m complaining, but what’s gotten into you?”

She’d been wondering the same thing just lately. Making out with her high-profile boyfriend in the middle of a work day when anyone could walk in on them was risky, but being with Draco made her feel brazen. “Can’t I just be excited to see you?” she said, nipping at his lower lip.

“Always,” he rumbled, distracted by her smart mouth. “Maybe I should go away on business more often, though,” he added huskily, “if this is how you’re going to welcome me back.”

“Oh? Were you out of town?” she joked, tugging on the soft white-blonde hairs at the back of his neck. “I hadn’t noticed.”

“Well, that would explain your lack of owls,” he said pointedly.

Hermione had the grace to look contrite. “Sorry about that. I’ve been so distracted with work lately and, well…”

“It’s alright, I know you miss me when I’m gone,” he said earnestly. Then, smirking, “I mean, otherwise, you’d just be using me for my wealth and status, not to mention my spectacular good looks and talent in the bedroom, and that would be beyond pathetic.”

Hermione pretended to contemplate his words. “Sure, I miss you,” she said with a straight face, “but then I remember what an asshole you are and the feeling fades.”

“Prat,” Draco said affectionately, hugging her close. “Now, out with it. What did you want to tell me?”

“Oh, nothing too important,” she said innocently, summoning the roll of parchment she’d been reading earlier off her desk. “Here, read this.”

Draco took the letter and carefully unrolled it. “Nothing too important?! Hermione, is this-?!”

“It is!” she affirmed as his pale eyes raced over the scroll. “I finally asked my solicitor to start divorce proceedings a few months ago, but it took a little longer than I expected since Ron and I had to work out a schedule for joint-custody first.”

Draco seemed overwhelmed when he looked up again. “But you’re free? You’re finally free?”

“As of this morning, yes.”

“I can’t believe it,” he whispered, setting the letter aside to cup her cheeks. “Are you okay? I know this is a big step.”

“I’ll always be a little sad that things ended the way they did with Ron, but I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you,” she assured him. “What about you? Happy?”

“Ecstatic,” he smiled, kissing her again for emphasis.

“You can name the date then,” Hermione said, wiggling her sparkling ring finger.

Draco took her hand and kissed the stunning emerald and diamond engagement ring adoring her slim digit. He’d given her his mother’s ring on their six month anniversary and she’d never taken it off.

“How about tomorrow then? We could take a portkey over to Paris in the morning and be back before anyone’s the wiser,” he proposed.

“Isn’t that a little soon?” she said bemusedly. “You know our mothers are dying to plan a huge wedding.”

“They can still plan it, but I’ve been in love with you half my life and I don’t want to wait any longer to call you my wife.”

“Okay, Draco,” she said easily. It wasn’t a difficult decision to make; she didn’t want to wait either. “Tomorrow.”

“Really?” he said excitedly. “You’re sure? What about the kids? It’ll be Saturday, so we could swing by Hogwarts too.”

“I think Hugo’s still holding out hope that Ron and I will get back together one day, but you know Rose loves you,” she said reassuringly. “Will Scorpius be okay with us making it official?”

“Since Scorpius likes you more than me already, I think we’re covered on that front.” Draco paused. “Plus, it’ll do him good to have a mother again. He puts up a brave front, but I know he misses Astoria dreadfully.”

“You’ve done such a great job raising him, Draco, I know she’d be proud,” Hermione said sympathetically.

“Thanks,” he replied thickly.

“You’re welcome,” she beamed. “I love you and I can’t wait to marry you.”

“Yeah?” he grinned, reaching up to release her unruly hair from its haphazard bun. He liked to run his fingers through it while they made love. “Care to show me how much?”

“Oh, what the hell,” she said, using a quick locking spell on the door before pressing her lips to his once again. “We’re getting married tomorrow! Work can wait.”

-FIN-

——————

A/N: I’ve really missed this ship, so working on fics for them again has been fun! I just really love stupid bad boys falling for sassy good girls, okay?!

#dramione #draco malfoy #hermione granger #dramione fic #dramione fanfic #prompts #thanks wifey #my fanfiction #sushigirlali #life goes on #divorce

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sage-nebula · 5 years ago

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I hope you dont mind my asking, but wouldn't GF have decided to remove the national dex long before LGPE released? I can see those games selling well confirming to GF that "pokemon sell well regardless of cut features" but it feels strange to blame it on LGPE when the development time on the games would suggest they made this choice awhile ago. (Not to defend lgpe lack of content) Sorry if this is a bother, I just feel like I'm missing something and would really like to understand your reasoning

For almost any other game I would agree, however for Pokémon in particular:

The National Dex (insofar as the ability to transfer old pokémon over) was never going to be a Day One feature. It’s never a Day One feature in the first games of the generation. Even if they wanted to make it one, in this case they couldn’t because Home isn’t releasing until 2020. As I’ve said in other posts, if they wanted to patch in the NatDex, they’d have the time to do it. Technically speaking, they’d have the time to do it, especially since the fanbase would be willing to wait (even if there’d be a few whiners here or there) the extra time.

Since it’s not a Day One feature, it’s something that can be worked on later in the development cycle (/can even continue to be worked on after the development cycle, or at least it could be if this series were treated with the respect of, say, The Legend of Zelda series). Again, I’m not talking about DLC that’s already on the game card that needs to be activated later, I’m talking about DLC that’s patched in, content created after that you download either to the harddrive or (though I don’t know if Switch DLC works this way specifically) onto the game card itself. Given the type of content they generally want to show early in the release cycle (the general theme / concept of the games, scenes of the various areas in the region, new ‘mon), and the fact that this would be a feature added post-release anyway, we can make a safe bet that the NatDex is something they’d work on much later in the development cycle, possibly even in the last year since, again . . . they’d have that time if they wanted to use it (and if this series was treated with genuine respect).

The Let’s Go games were stated by Masuda to be the future of the franchise if they sold well. They featured a Pokédex that was limited to only the Kanto ‘Dex, plus Meltan and Melmetal. They released in November 2018, and indeed, they sold well. In early 2019 (February, IIRC) Sword & Shield were released. While of course I don’t work at Game Freak and thus can’t say for sure, I would place money on the idea that if they were even a bit on the fence about adding the National Dex, the fact that Let’s Go sold so well despite being limited to 153 ‘mon pushed them right over the edge to, “Cut the National Dex from Sword & Shield, there’s no point in working on it.” I mean, why should they expend the effort if people will buy the games anyway? Especially when President Ishihara went on record saying that long-time fans only cared about “new pokémon and features” around the time of Let’s Go’s release. Sure, they might have already been thinking about cutting the National Dex beforehand, but Let’s Go no doubt assured them that it was a safe and correct call to make.

So that’s what I mean when I say that Let’s Go’s positive sales figures sealed all of our fates. To be entirely honest, before the National Dex announcement, I was certain that we wouldn’t see the shockwaves from Let’s Go until Gen IX. But Sword & Shield having a limited ‘Dex just like Let’s Go, and having special feature ‘mon behind $60 paywalls like Let’s Go, and having core features stripped out like Let’s Go, and the fact that it’s starting to look frighteningly like the starters won’t be able to evolve like in Let’s Go . . . the effect is pretty apparent. Sure, some of this stuff was present even before Let’s Go (namely the whole “let’s ditch useful features in the name of simplifying things” tack that Masuda has been married to for years now), but in the wake of Let’s Go, it’s success, and what Masuda said would happen if it was successful, it’s really hard not to see the link.

(Note just in case anyone read too quickly: I’m not saying the starters WON’T evolve. I’m only saying that I’m starting to fear that’s the case since we’re less than a month away from release and we haven’t even seen second stage evolutions yet. Maybe they’re just trying to keep starter evolutions a surprise, that’s entirely possible, but it’s also highly suspect, and Game Freak destroyed any trust or good faith I had in them a while back.)

As a final note, the reason why I say that the Pokémon games aren’t treated with respect is . . . well, there are a few reasons:

Game Freak stated themselves that they put their B Team on Sword & Shield while their A Team worked on Little Town Hero. They also said they wanted to create something, “as exciting, or perhaps even more exciting” than Pokémon. They’re tired of working on Pokémon, and it shows. Which, I mean, I get it, it’s been 20+ years, but in that case tell Nintendo so that they can shift the main games over to another studio. I get that Game Freak was created for the sole purpose of making Pokémon, and maybe Taijiri-san is pissed at how you’re disrespecting his baby (I would be), but for the good of the series, if you don’t want to work on it, give it to someone who does. Don’t just shift it onto your bare bones secondary dev team.

These games are in a hellish development cycle where a new one is popped out every year. Contrast this to The Legend of Zelda where, while we’ve had some anomalies where assets were able to be largely reused and so games came out only a couple years apart (see: Ocarina of Time to Majora’s Mask) --- even that had two or three years before releases, not one the very next year. Most mainline Zelda games spend five or six years in development. I’m fully aware that we will likely be waiting until something like 2022 for Breath of the Wild 2, and I am prepared to wait that time because I know the game we get will be incredible. Granted, I’m going to be dying every single time they announce a release date to push it back, but it’ll be a death I’m grateful for because I will know that the end product will be worth it. The Pokémon games used to have a similar luxury. While there were a grand total of five games released during that time (with “five games” being used loosely, given that one was a slight upgrade and the other four were really two games with slight differences between versions), Gen IV lasted for a grand total of four years. We had Diamond & Pearl in 2006, Platinum in 2008, HeartGold & SoulSilver in 2009, and then finally, Black & White in 2010. By contrast, Gen VII didn’t even last three years, technically. I mean, this November would be its third anniversary, but that’s when Gen VIII officially starts instead. To be fair, it could be argued that Gen IV didn’t have a full four years since it came out in September 2006, and Gen V came out in September 2010. But even if you make that argument, it still had a full year on Gen VII, and to be honest, that showed. The Sinnoh games are far and away not my faves, but they were still full of content. HeartGold & SoulSilver are often considered to be the best remakes in the entire franchise, and considering the content that was cut from OmegaRuby & AlphaSapphire and Masuda’s reasoning for why that content was cut, I can’t exactly argue with that even though I did genuinely enjoy ORAS. And the games that Gen IV ushered in? Controversial opinion, but I think that the Pokémon games peaked with Gen V. Black & White not only initially had a ‘dex that was nothing but new pokémon (and yet STILL included the Nat Dex later, because in Masuda’s own words he felt it cruel to keep people from playing with their faves forever!), but it also introduced a METRIC TON of new mechanics, some of which we no longer get to use (Rotation Battles? Game Freak doesn’t know her). Who knows what exactly Game Freak did with that extra year, but it was clearly a lot of work given how wonderful the games were in Gen IV and Gen V. The extra dev time showed.By contrast, Gen VII got 2.5 years (or 3 if you’re being generous). Every single game released during this gen had massive content cuts, even when comparing to Gen VI, which also had massive content cuts. Mechanics were stripped away, and Ultra Sun & Ultra Moon technically didn’t have a NatDex either, but at least you could still have all of your ‘mon in them at a later date if you wanted to. Now with Sword & Shield, we don’t even have that, despite the Switch being far more powerful than the 3DS. (We also don’t have Mega Evolution for whatever godforsaken reason, even though the Kanto Mega Evolutions at the very least were already used in Let’s Go, the fuck, Game Freak). Pokémon games print money and always have, and Game Freak has taken this and their lack of interest in the series to the depressing but I suppose logical extreme of “do whatever and they’ll buy it anyway.” There’s no love here, there’s no respect here. They just don’t care anymore, and as someone who does care an awful lot, it’s super upsetting to me.

And while people have tried to argue that the games can’t be delayed because of the anime or the card game or whatever else:

The games come first. They’ve always come first. I know some people mistakenly think that the anime came first and that the games were created later, but that is 100% false. Pokémon started as a game series and the anime was created to advertise the games, straight up.

Filler episodes exist, and the PokéAni is no stranger to them. The Orange Islands arc was an entire arc of filler created to pad time between Gens I and II. The Delacora Islands (or whatever they were called) was a filler arc meant to pad time between Gens V and VI. Arguably the majority of the Sun & Moon anime was filler, given its slice-of-life genre, meaning the anime was even less of an excuse not to delay Sword & Shield. You can’t tell me people wouldn’t have been happy with another year of the Alola crew running around getting into random adventures. People would have eaten that up and loved it. We could have had it all.

I’m not even going to dignify “but the card game” with a response lmao. This isn’t Yu-Gi-Oh!. Sure, the card game makes money, and probably a decent amount of it (merch sales probably make up the franchise’s greatest source of income, and as someone who easily spent several hundred dollars in two weeks at the PokéCenters in Japan---including over $100 in one trip to a PokéCenter while I was there, and we went multiple times---I am a big part of that), but they come up with bullshit new expansions all the time and could easily keep doing it. Again, not a reason to delay the games if the games need more time in development.

So all in all, at the end of the day, Game Freak is no longer treating these games with love and respect, which makes them an awful lot like the villains in the games they create. The Let’s Go games were harbingers of disaster for the games, and we were told this very plainly, and just about no one listened. In fact, I legitimately lost friendships with people who got mad at me for making Facebook statuses about how they should buy Let’s Go used if they absolutely had to have them because how DARE I believe Ishihara when he said that Let’s Go were considered core titles, and how DARE I believe Masuda when he said that Let’s Go would usher in the last twenty years of the franchise. Clearly, I was just being an ugly bitch. (I wish I was exaggerating, but this actually happened, I got blocked over it, it was ridiculous.) And now here we are as a result, with no hope of things getting better unless Nintendo forcibly rips Pokémon out of Game Freak’s hands, which I don’t even think they can legally do given that they only own 1/3rd of the IP. (The other 2/3rds belong to Game Freak and Creatures Inc., as I understand it.)

TL;DR:

Pokémon is still my favorite fictional fantasy world, but as someone who has always loved the games first and foremost, the current state of it depresses me to no end.

#this kind of got off the original topic but i hope it's coherent at least #pokemon salt #pokemon negativity #long post for ts #Anonymous

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footballfangurl · 6 years ago

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Neymar - criticism

wordcount : 948

credits to whoever made this gif because goddamn...

This is loosely based on the song 'they don't know about us' by One Direction.

I pursed my lips, my eyes scanning over the words that were posted online on twitter and not liking what I saw. There were many different tweets, the majority of which hate-filled messages towards me, but the general message was the same. This time it was about how we were too young to commit ourselves like this and that we were making a grave mistake. The cause of the recent criticism was the fact that Neymar proposed to me a few days ago and someone had spotted the engagement ring on my hand. That led to us being judged for getting married at 21 years old - well I was 21, Ney was 22. But they didn't take into account how long we'd been together. We had begun dating when I was 16 and in the five years that we'd been together, everything had been great. There was no unnecessary drama, which was exactly how we both liked it, so to see people judge our relationship like that hurt a little bit. They didn't know anything about us. They didn't know about the nights where we stayed up, talking the entire night about the little things in life and about the future. They didn't know about the many laughs we shared whenever we were together. They didn't know about how I fell in love with him a little more each day, which I didn't even think was possible. They didn't know about how I took care of him after every match, when he came back with bruises littered across his entire body because of the shoves he got when he was on the football pitch. They didn't know about his fears like I did, about his hopes and dreams like I did, about all he went through to get where he was now and the sacrifices he had to make in the process - the sacrifices WE had to make.

I felt myself getting worked up over it. What right did they have to judge our relationship like this? I stewed over these thoughts for a few more minutes before I finally relaxed when I felt two arms snake around my waist and a kiss pressed to my shoulder.

"Good morning, meu amor," I smiled when I heard Ney's morning voice. I loved the husky tone he got when he just woke up.

"Good morning, minha vida." I returned the greeting, closing the magazine before me and turning my head slightly to give him a kiss. He pressed his lips to mine softly and I hummed in contentment. I would never give this up, not for anything in the world. They didn't know about these kind of mornings, where he'd hug me from behind whilst I was cooking breakfast or where he'd insist I sit down allow him to cook. They didn't know about the late calls during the night whenever I was back in Brazil visiting my family and he had to stay in Barcelona because he had a match to play that week. They didn't know about all the times I had to comfort him because THEY broke his heart with all the criticism he got. They didn't know about the all the little things we did to show the other that we loved them, whether it was the roses he sometimes brought home or the fact that I cooked him his favourite meals whenever he had a hard time at training.

When we broke apart, Neymar released his arms from around my waist and instead ran his hands up and down my arms slowly and comfortingly. Again, I sighed in contentment. It was like he automatically knew, time and time again, when I was bothered by something and needed comforting. This was just one of a long, long list of things that made me love him. They didn't know about the random dances he pulled me in sometimes, often ending up with us on the ground, laughing our asses off. They didn't know about the sweet good morning texts he sent whenever he was away for a match. They didn't know about the thoughtful gifts he gave me when it was valentine or my birthday or our anniversary. And sure, there were fights, but they could have easily been called disagreements with how insignificant the majority of them were.

"What's wrong?" He murmured, kissing the side of my face before releasing my arms to lean against the countertop. My fiancé took a few grapes out of the fruit bowl and popped them in his mouth, one at a time.

"Just the media again." Neymar sighed in exasperation and reached for my hand, pulling me closer when I placed my hand in his. He gripped my hips, squeezing them softly, before slowly sliding his hands over to rest on my butt. I raised my eyebrow at him and he just grinned innocently in response.

"What're they saying now?"

"The usual. Things I shouldn't be paying any attention to, actually." I admitted, kissing his lips before pushing away from him by placing my hands on his chest.

"Then why are you?" He cocked his head slightly to the side in curiosity and I grinned because whenever he did that, he reminded me a little bit of a cute dog.

"You know me, I can't help it. I'm too curious for my own good." Ney grinned in response, pushing away from the counter and making his way over to the fridge to get something to eat, caressing my hip softly when he passed me.

"That, amor, is an understatement."

And even if they knew about all this, they'd just be jealous and find something else to complain about.

#neymar one shot #neymar imagine #neymar one-shot #neymar

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indescribablechoices · 6 years ago

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Masterlist (updated 06/09/20)

Fics are listed in chronological order according to story progression, not date of posting, and obviously some were written before books were fully released so I’ve taken some liberties with plots. Ones listed at the bottom are for future fics I plan to write, please feel free to send asks/prompts.

MC Masterlist

The Royal Romance (Liam Rys x Alicia Harper)

This Room Where You Should Be - After having her engagement party ruined by assassins, Alicia speeds towards a safe house with an injured Drake, not knowing what lies ahead; whether any of her friends or her beloved Liam made it out alive. (will direct to my old blog)

Wish Comes True - During an interview, Alicia gets herself in a twist over the thought of the holidays, and Liam makes a promise he intends to keep.

Piece by Piece - A year after their wedding as Alicia, Liam and the others celebrate her birthday.

Where You Abandoned Things - A figure from Alicia’s past turns up, and Liam learns why his wife has never spoken about her family before.

Reach In A Little Deeper - When a security threat leaves Alicia and Olivia trapped in a room together, things only get worse when Alicia goes into labour with hers and Liam’s first child.

Count On Me (Maxwell x Penelope) - Maxwell comes to Alicia for advice. Feelings and an abundance of platonic love follow.

Your Kingdom (D&D crossover) - After becoming Queen, Alicia begins to look back over her own family tree and finds some things she didn’t expect.

Side by Side - Liam and Alicia wake up together on their five year anniversary.

Lift Your Chin A Little Higher - Twenty years after the events of TRR, Liam’s daughter visits the gardens in Valtoria to reminisce about the past, hoping to find comfort for the future.

Enchanting Series (updated 28/04/20) - The story of Liam and Alicia’s daughter Lyra as she enters the social season in search of a husband. Familiar faces, sibling shenanigans and naturally; romance, all await along the way.

Perfect Match (Damien Nazario x Kai Park)

All I’ve Ever Learned From Love - Kai and Hayden have barely spoken since everything that went down with Eros in New York. During a quiet moment, he begins to reevaluate their relationship and what it means for the future. (will direct to my old blog)

Afraid of Falling - After talking with Hayden, Kai heads out to find Damien and finally fess up her feelings. But it seems Damien had the same idea.

Nobody But You (NSFW) - After admitting their feelings for each other, Kai and Damien let their desires get the better of them.

Indescribable - Kai’s life is falling apart when the truth about Damien is revealed. (will direct to my old blog)

Walking The Wire - A rewrite of the reunion scene with some memories more personal to my Kai and hers and Damien’s relationship.

Someone’s Bound To Get Burned - Kai and the others rescued Damien days ago, but he barely look at her. Kai confronts him, and an argument ensues.

Miss Me When I’m Gone - Kai and Damien talk about Nadia leaving in a quiet moment together. Discussions about the future ensue.

Take What Comes - Distracted texting leaves Kai in an awkward situation when her auto correct decides to propose to Damien.

Dancin’ Merrily - Kai and Damien spend their first Christmas together as a married couple with their family.

It Isn’t Easy - Damien heads home to Kai after a long day at work, but some discussions about the past may affect their future.

My Arms Will Hold You - Four times Kai Park woke up in Damien’s arms and one time she didn’t. Set across their years of knowing each other.

Dedicating Every Day To You - Kai wakes up in the middle of the night and Damien isn’t beside her. She finds him in the nursery instead.

Just One More Thing - Damien and Kai head to the local dog shelter and bring home a new member of the family.

Go Gentle - Kai receives a phone call from her children’s high school, listing off all of the trouble her son is in. She asks for an explanation from him and delves deeper than she planned.

(Damien Nazario x Hayden Young x Kai Park x Alana Kusuma)

Stay The Course - On the flight from Tokyo to San Francisco, Damien and Hayden take a moment to talk and clear the air for the first time since everything happened with Eros. Bonding and fluff ensue.

The Things That You Want - During a quiet afternoon in San Francisco, Damien asks Kai about her feelings for Hayden and makes a proposition that could benefit everyone.

Be Your Safety (NSFW) - After Hayden walks out in San Francisco, Kai goes after him, and a heart to heart leads to confessions.

The Human In Me - Damien comes home on his lunch break and interrupts more than a dance party.

How Long You Would Wait For Me (Alana x MC focused) - After receiving the worst news possible, Kai reflects on her relationship with Alana.

One So Small - Kai is in labour, and needs the people she loves around her.

So Snowy White - A little glimpse into one Christmas at the Nazario-Young household. Damien pulls a scam. Kai teases her boys. Hayden learns the meaning of a perfect memory.

Let Me Go Home (part one, TH:M crossover) - Eighteen months after the events in Monaco, Nina brings Sonia home to meet the family.

It Lives In The Woods (Andy Kang x Maggie Young)

Pull Me Closer - After their first kiss in the pool, Andy and Maggie head into the laundry room to dry off.

If I Only Could - Andy wakes up from surgery and realises that not everyone made it out of the ruins. (will direct to my old blog)

The Sharp Knife of a Short Life - Maggie decides to pay a visit to Jane and Noah’s mother after Noah’s ‘death’ in the ruins.

Tonight - Maggie is preparing to go to prom with her friends, but she can’t help but feel the absence of her boyfriend as he rests his still injured leg. But it seems that fate, and Andy, have other ideas.

It Lives Beneath (Tom Sato x Penn Vance)

A Love Like This - Tom and Penn spend a lazy afternoon together, and Tom has a sudden realisation.

The Haunting of Braidwood Manor (Eleanor Waverley x Hadley Byrd)

So Full Of Love - Hadley reflects on her time with Eleanor and begins to worry that she made the wrong choice.

When I Am With You - Hadley and Eleanor discuss their plans as the seasons begin to change and reflect on the time they’ve had together.

Your Kiss Is Like A Lost Ghost (AU) - AU in which Hadley is a reincarnated version of the original governess of Braidwood Manor, and when she returns in present day, she finds herself falling for Eleanor all over again.

Veil of Secrets (Flynn O’Malley x Marli Greene)

Running Out Of Words To Say - After the events of VoS, Marli heads home for real this time, but will either her or Flynn have the courage to tell the other how they really feel?

Bloodbound (Adrian Raines x Emeline Martinez)

All That Grace - Adrian has a beautiful night out planned for him and Emeline to prove his commitment to her, but her all too human immune system gets in the way. Though things always have a way of working out in the end…

It’s You And Me - An engagement party with Em’s family has Adrian wondering about the future, and the things they can and can’t have together.

We Can’t Tell The Future (AU) - What if Adrian hadn’t recognised Emeline in time when his body was overtaken by the serum? What if it had other lasting effects on his body?

Open Heart (Rafael Aveiro x Cora Chase) (Kyra Santana x Cora Chase)

Where You Belong (Rafael x MC) - AU. There is no attack on the hospital, and Rafael leaves Edenbrook for the last time. Cora realises that she has one chance before the man she loves is gone for good.

Guess I’d Rather Hurt Than Feel Nothing At All (Part One) - Months after their breakup, Cora and Rafael spend one more night together.

Just A Delicate Kiss (Part One.5) - Cora gets called into Ethan’s office, and her true feelings about Kyra come to light.

Everything You Kept Inside (Part Two) - After finding out that she is pregnant after a one night stand with Rafael, Cora has a lot to think about.

These Nights Never Seem To Go To Plan (Part Three) - Cora finally tells Rafael about the pregnancy.

America’s Most Eligible (Mackenzie Harris x Winnie Reed)

Me and My Ripped Jeans and You - Mackenzie goes over to Winnie’s apartment one afternoon and finds her girlfriend wearing her jacket.

My Sweet Honey Bee - Mackenzie and Winnie take the next step in their future together.

Desire and Decorum (Luke Harper x Jess Woodmire)

Let This Moment Be The First Chapter - Jess and Luke visit Luke’s estate together for the first time after its completion and their thoughts turn to the future.

No Beat, No Melody (AU) - The consequences of the duel.

A Garden You Never Get To See (AU) - The consequences of the duel, part two.

The One I Was Meant To Find (AU)

- Part One: Jess can’t take the pressure any more and runs away from the estate. Mr Harper comes to find her, and in the wake of an impending proposal, they finally admit their feelings for each other.

Losing Sight of You (AU) - Part Two: The morning after, Jess awakes with the man she loves, but she knows that this happiness cannot last.

Enough (AU) - Part Three: Left alone and scared for her future happiness, Jess knows that she has to do something before she finds herself wed to the Duke and torn apart from her beloved Mr Harper forever.

Your Kingdom (TRR crossover) - After becoming Queen, Alicia begins to look back over her own family tree and finds some things she didn’t expect.

The Heist: Monaco (Sonia Alves x Nina Nazario-Young)

This Woman Is My Destiny - Nina takes the biggest risk she’s ever taken, and Sonia gets a surprise visitor.

Let Me Go Home (part one, PM crossover) - Eighteen months after the events in Monaco, Nina brings Sonia home to meet the family.

Red Carpet Diaries (Matt Rodriguez x Bailey Johnson)

The Best Day With You - A little family fluff fic between Matt, Bailey and their daughter Sofia.

Across The Void (Sol x Bo Elara)

Oh, Let’s Get Lost - Sol and Bo take some time away to themselves, enjoying being in love on a distant planet away from everything else.

A Courtesan of Rome (Syphax x Korina x Sabina)

Lead Me Back Home (Syphax x MC focused) - Finally away from the grasp of Rome, Korina takes in the life she has built with the people she loves

Mother of the Year (Thomas Mendez x Lori Day)

Surrounded By Your Embrace - Thomas and Lori celebrate their two year anniversary together. Lori thinks back over their relationship and Thomas gets a present he wasn’t expecting.

Big Sky Country (Sawyer Oakley x Daphne Dehaven)

Scars On Our Hearts - After Sawyer is injured at the rodeo, he and Daphne get into a fight at the hospital about the decisions they’ve both made.

The Elementalists (Beckett Harrington x Hallie Russell)

Blades of Light and Shadow (Nia Ellarious x Aurora Feathertide x Imtura)

Nightbound (Nik Ryder x Willow Greeves)

The Royal Masquerade (Kayden Vescovi x Ophelia Aster)

Ride or Die (Mona x Rose Wheeler) (Ingrid Delaney x Rose Wheeler)

Distant Shores (Charlie Smith x Emily Hawthorne)

Unexpected Heiress (John Somerset x Marianne Hayes)

The Nanny Affair (Sam Dalton x June Martinez)

Queen B (Ian Kingsley x Briar Hughes)

Platinum (Shane Parker x Adelyn Oliver)

Sunkissed (Samson x Skylar Bell)

Wishful Thinking (Jaime Lewis x Kit Huxley)

Home For the Holidays (Holly Wright x Robyn Joy)

Baby Bump (Myra Dixon x Theo Cassidy)

Rules of Engagement (Leo Rys x Kaylee Buchanan)

Passport to Romance (Ahmed Khabbaz x Nell Shepherd)

#masterlist #I'm bored and should be sleeping so I'm doing some housekeeping #the royal romance #perfect match #it lives in the woods #the haunting of braidwood manor #america's most eligible #across the void #bloodbound #desire and decorum #veil of secrets

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atopfourthwall · 6 years ago

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State of the Wall: 8-8-18

Some big History of Power Rangers news, some big DVD news, and various other things in this one!

Schedule of Upcoming Episodes 8/6 – Ravage 2099 #2 8/13 – Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man #2 8/20 – Tandy Computer Whiz Kids: Safeguarding the Environment 8/27 – Mr. T and the T-Force #4 Star Trektember 9/3 – Star Trek #2 (DC) 9/10 – Star Trek 2009 Comic Adaptation 9/17 – Star Trek: The Next Generation #4 9/24 – Star Trek #1 (Gold Key)

As always, the schedule is subject to change for any reason – particularly if something happens in my personal life that forces me to interrupt the regular schedule, as what happened in the last few months (in case you somehow haven’t heard – flooding in my basement, car crash, etc.). As such, one episode that I had originally scheduled for this block of episodes has been bumped and I HOPE to add it back in as a double feature for one of these weeks, but I make no promises because my schedule is very busy – especially around this time of year as I start gearing up for Longbox of the Damned. On that note…

Longbox of the Damned Two big things for Longbox that hopefully you guys can be made aware of! First and foremost is that the Longbox of the Damned 2018 Bumper Contest has begun! You can see more details HERE, but the short version is that like the last two years, you can submit an end-of-video bumper for Longbox and 31 of them will be shown off! The ending date is September 15th and the exact rules and regulations can be found in the video I just linked.

Otherwise, as per the Patreon Milestone, this year we’re having another Midsummer’s Nightmare! It’s a brief one – a four-episode Godzillathon premiering on Saturdays throughout August first on a regular Saturday Night livestream before then being made public on its own. Details can be found in THIS VIDEO, so check that out and I hope you enjoy them!

History of Power Rangers As a reminder, the Ninja Steel videos won’t be scheduled until the series is complete and it’s all out on DVD. As of right now, I have the first season of Ninja Steel on preorder, but Super Ninja Steel isn’t yet complete.

So of course a while ago when I announced I was going to be putting History of Power Rangers on youtube in new versions only and completely replacing the old versions, I was operating under the assumption that I could knock them out pretty quickly since I had the scripts done. However, due to storyline stuff in Atop the Fourth Wall, all the prepwork necessary for the 10th anniversary, my own personal life issues that keep getting in the way of everything, and just basically EVERY OTHER THING IN THE WORLD KEEPING ME BUSY it has taken far longer than I expected them to go back up.

I still want to finish their revised versions and make those the official version, but until I can finalize all that, I’ve uploaded them to Vimeo. There’s still the potential for them to be taken down for Copyright reasons, but at this point I’m willing to risk it. Even youtube is having issues with stuff now as they’ve revised their ContentID algorithm and some videos have been hit by multiple ContentID claims (sometimes not showing up until a few days after I reupload them). I want people to actually be able to see them, especially as people have been following the instruction to circulate the links and people have found them missing. So yeah, all History of Power Rangers videos are up now in SOME form – be it youtube or Vimeo.

Eventually, the new versions WILL supplant the old ones, but these ones should be a lot easier to download through Vimeo than they were on Vid.me, so feel free to pirate to your heart’s content the ones on Vimeo (as long as you don’t reupload them to youtube). Don’t worry about costing me revenue for downloading them – Vimeo doesn’t use advertising for its videos. If you still feel like contributing something for all the work (especially since the downside of Vimeo is that *I* have to pay to use it), feel free to buy a DVD, a t-shirt, sending money to the Patreon – it’s all good. Ooooor you can purchase a DVD digitally, which brings us to the next point.

Digital DVDs I’ve been talking about doing this forever, but it’s finally happened! One of the advantages of the Vimeo account is a digital distribution platform for the DVDs!

Vimeo has limitations depending on what kind of account you use for how much you can upload per week, so right now because of me having to upload all of History of Power Rangers, only volumes 1 and 2 are currently available for sale. However, volumes 2.5 and 3 WILL be available soon (most likely next week once the weekly restriction resets). I still need to discuss with Screenwave about selling the movie DVD’s contents online, but we’ll see about that.

In the meantime, you can check out volume 1 HERE and volume 2 HERE!

Unfortunately, due to my workload with everything else, I likely won’t have that volume 4 DVD I was teasing for October. Still, when it IS eventually released, there will be a simultaneous digital release on Vimeo.

Patreon Patreon-sponsored review slots will be returning in September! I don’t know if I’ll make a big announcement on social media when it happens, but that’s mostly because there will be a TON of people hoping to get them… and there will still only be two slots available.

As I discussed in the last State of the Wall post, the method of payment WILL change. When you get the slot, you will be charged $50 immediately and that will guarantee your slot. However, you also have to stay into the next month and be charged another $50 for a total of $100 to absolutely have it. Think of the first $50 as your down-payment. This should hopefully keep Patreon-sponsored episodes from overwhelming the schedule as it sometimes has done in the past. You can feel free to hang onto the slot longer if you want, but bear in mind I will STILL have the policy in place that you can only request a review once per year.

On another note, I wanted to ask you guys about something that’s been suggested by some of my colleagues. Patreon has two ways of paying for things – per video/content or per month. I go per month considering I like the stability of knowing how much I make per month plus I sometimes put A LOT of content out there – minimum of four videos with Atop the Fourth Wall. However, the thing about paying per video released is that I don’t have to CHARGE people for every single video put out (nor would I), so it’s not like, say, if it was October and you were a $2 patron that you’d suddenly get $64 charged for Longbox for that month. You can also put restrictions on how much you’re willing to pay – so if you were a $5 patron, but you don’t want to overspend, you could limit it and say “I cannot be charged for more than $10 for this month.”

This would likely alter how I do the reward tiers and if you ARE interested in me switching to per-video I’d love to hear suggestions on how you’d prefer the reward tiers be handled – is the $10 reward of getting your name in the credits now for anyone who has a minimum of $10 in a single month… or is it still just for the people who are pledging $10 per video? That sort of thing.

Let me know what you guys think!

Conventions Power Morphicon – As indicated in the Power Rangers Turbo vs. Beetleborgs Metallix review, I will be returning to Power Morphicon this summer! I was last there in 2010 when I had nothing to really show for it other than some minor name value for having done History of Power Rangers, but this time around I should have a live show and get to hang out with some other Power Rangers-related youtubers. Power Morphicon is on August 17-19 at the Anaheim Convention Center in Anaheim, CA! And as a reminder for that one, if you can’t attend to get the exclusive Lord Drakkon figure, you can purchase a non-attending badge and have it shipped to you! LionCon – Another Minnesota convention! I’ll be at LionCon at the River’s Edge Convention Center in St. Cloud, Minnesota on September 22nd-23rd! I’ll be doing a live show, selling stuff at a table – that kind of thing. Come on out and have some fun!

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silverleafnightshade-blog · 6 years ago

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The Eyes of Laura Mars

Released in 1978, The Eyes of Laura Mars is set in the glimmering yet gritty world of NYC haute couture fashion. Mad Magazine parodied the film as “The Eyes of Lurid Mess” and rightly so, for it definitely has plot issues and some grade-A-Virginia-ham overacting. However, director Irvin Kershner managed to capture a whiff of the cultural crossover as the NYC scene shifted from disco to punk. Often touted as the first American giallo film, The Eyes of Laura Mars tidily ticks off the boxes of the Italian genre: a mix of gorgeous and grimy settings, the gruesome murder of beautiful people, and many misdirections before the killer is finally revealed. Added to the mix is Ms. Virginia Ham herself (Faye Dunaway), a hairy Brad Dourif, and a preternaturally prehistoric Tommy Lee Jones. Dourif is only four years younger than TLJ in real life, but he looks like a bearded baby next to TLJ’s tire-treaded brow. Hell, TLJ is six years younger than Dunaway, but there’s not even a scratch of the cougar in their relationship.

Faye Dunaway of course plays the main character, a superstar high fashion photographer who begins to have disturbing visions of murder. Fun fact: the actual images of famous fashion photogs Rebecca Blake and the so-called “King of Kink” Helmut Newton were used in the film.

Speaking of kink, Barbra Streisand was offered the main role (it helped that she was dating producer Jon Peters at the time) but turned it down because she thought the film’s violent, sexual content was too out-there for her image.

The film opens with a murderous sequence, which turns out to be one of Laura’s nightmares. She awakens in her rather spare and severe bedroom,

and then wanders out to her living room, aka The Neutral Zone. Beige and brown rule the day, as does that giant rooster sculpture. From kitchen kitsch to highbrow decor? Huh. And oof, so. Much. Carpeting!

Laura flips through some negatives and tries to put the nightmare behind her. Soon, driver Tommy (Brad Dourif) is ferrying Laura off to the gala reception for a new publication of her photos. It looks like maybe the exterior was shot at one of the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s side doors. The interior looks somewhat Studio 54-inspired, though.

Hiiiiiiyyyyyeeee! I’m just a photograph, don’tcha worry.

Laura meets cute-ish with Detective John Neville (TLJ), as cute as can be when one’s publisher has been horribly murdered with an ice pick. Neville came for the questioning, but he stayed for the hors d’oeuvres, or rather, he looks a bit hungry for a Mars Bar. Laura goes home and rings up her bestie, who happens to be dating Laura’s ex-husband Michael (a very slimy yet somehow sexy Raul Julia). Everyone calms each other down, and soon enough, Laura heads off for a shoot at Columbus Circle. The concept is a bit S&M, models in lingerie and furs fighting in front of the husks of burning cars...

The concept was inspired by photog Chris von Wangenheim, and so fitting in front of what my father once called “The Devil’s Arsehole” (don’t feel special, C.C., he said that about every Washington D.C. roundabout too). The intersection didn’t get the moniker until 1892, the 400th anniversary of Columbus’s “discovery” of the New World, when a giant statue of the old man was erected. From the invention of the car on, Columbus Circle was considered a hazardous spot for pedestrians. Given the circle’s bad rap for most of the 20th century, it seems quaint to remember that Olmsted intentionally designed the traffic circle as the grand entrance to Central Park in 1857. By 1978, Columbus Circle was “roundly” (oh ho ho) derided as a dangerous thoroughfare. In 1979, architecture critic Paul Goldberger said that the intersection was "a chaotic jumble of streets that can be crossed in about 50 different ways—all of them wrong." A redesign of the circle’s aesthetics and traffic flow began in 1991, and by the Naughty-Aughties, Columbus Circle had even won a few awards for landscape architecture and urban design.

Neville shows up again at Laura’s set at Chelsea Piers. This is my favorite set in the movie, with the fabulous Sterling St. Jacques dancing around and a lot of blown-out color and drama going on.

It’s also one of our last scenes with poor Lulu and Michelle, alas. I actually quite like both of their characters, so silly and yet so sassy. They have the best outgoing answering machine message, and it made me feel so nostalgic for both answering machines, answering machine messages, and that kind of close relationship you’d have with a roommate. That is the kind of relationship that can only be built after hearing all your messages, and knowing all your secrets, unvarnished and unedited by a brunch re-telling. Sigh.

Laura’s studio is amazing - it’s enormous with tons of old windows, stunning harbor views, and some convenient soft spots that are perfect for sexy times with Neville.

Donald (René motherfucking Murat Auberjonois) is such a great character. He’s Laura’s long-suffering agent, and although at times walking the stereotypical line, he is quite comfortably un-closeted. Whenever someone tries to throw homophobic shade his way, he shines a light right up their asses. I do not love the character’s decor choices, though - a bit too Italianate for me, although who can resist a red damask wallpaper and this goddamn face? Not me, friends.

Speaking of Italian classics, Frank Adonis makes an appearance as Sal, Neville’s slightly unhinged partner. I like this shot of him surveying Laura’s apartment with a “mmm, not bad,” expression.

Frank just shuffled off this mortal coil in late 2018, R.I.P. Weird fact: although he’s the Italian guy you recognize from everything, his Wiki page is in French.

SPOILERS, sort of: Neville goes to see Tommy at his spectacularly depressing apartment, and the visit quickly takes a turn for the worse. Tommy stabs a patrolman while escaping arrest, but the Sal the psycho just opens fire on what appears to be the entire East Village, and Tommy est la morte. Neville rings up Laura to tell her the killer has been caught, and pack your bag, baybeee, they are going away! Laura begins to select some careful neutrals to coordinate with the lady Derringer gifted by Neville, when she is suddenly struck by another vision.

Poor Michael gets ‘picked in the elevator of Laura’s building, and the killer is en route to her apartment! Laura manages to lock the front door just in time. Neville soon comes crashing through the balcony window, and this is where the ending gets super giallo: as he begins babbling about Tommy’s terrible upbringing, Neville accidentally reveals that it is he, Neville, who is the killer. But it’s not really Neville! No, it’s his other personality that did the killing. That personality is also apparently responsible for how nicely Neville fills out a black turtleneck, as well as for finishing Neville’s dissertation and keeping the bills paid. The real Neville struggles back to the surface; to protect his true love, he basically shoots himself using Laura’s gun (and trigger finger, as she is holding said gun at the time). The final shot is of Laura calling the cops, and her final line? “I’m Laura Mars.” If there is any shred of happy ending to this story, it might be that she has to rip out that fucking bloodstained carpet. Maybe there’s a nice parquet floor under there? I know that hating on carpeting is low-pile fruit, but there is just no way for mere mortals to keep wall-to-wall carpeting from getting disgusting.

Interesting fact: John Carpenter wrote the spec script for this film, but Kershner’s finished product took some hot turns in the rewrite. Carpenter was still credited despite his protests, but luckily the mixed reviews didn’t affect the success of his next project, Halloween. It’s been nice to revisit some giallo, although I think I’m going to go back to the real-deal Italian giallo next month. I might also be leaving this platform, as sad as that makes me. Tumblr has been doing some bullshit flagging of posts that are very LGBTQ-unfriendly, and well, they are also buggy as hell. I had this post written a week ago but the site kept crashing as I was trying to update. At any rate, stay tuned for any updates, or as I likely know all three of you reading this, I’ll let you know if there’s a new site.

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themikewheelers · 6 years ago

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get to know me tag

Rules: Repost and answer the 20 questions and tag 20 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by: @janes-mike tysm !!!

Tagging: im not sure whos been tagged yet but @serendipitous-rambles @sstrangerthaneleven @finnwolfhards @charliesheatcns @janeswheeler @dustinhendrsn @finswolvhard and anyone else who wants to do it, just say i tagged u bc im bad at coming up with urls off the top of my head !!

im putting questions under the cut so its not long and annoying for anyone who wants to scroll

Nickname: tori mostly. my family calls me tor. some friends call me vicky (which i absolutely cant stand). plus some other little nicknames which stem from inside jokes and stuff

Height: 5′1-2″

Orientation: bi

Favourite fruit: strawberries !

Favourite season: summer or fall !

Favourite flower: sunflowers and daisies

Favourite scent: kinda weird but i LOVE the smell of chlorine pools sm

Favourite colour: changes like every day but rn im loving yellow

Favourite animal: frogs !!

Coffee, tea or hot chocolate: hot chocolate all the way

Average hours of sleep: anywhere from like 4 to 10 tbh, im rlly inconsistent

Cat or dogs?: i love both but i kinda lean towards cats

Favourite fictional character: this is hard bc im def someone who falls in love with stories based on the characters so there’s a LOT i love but trying to limit it to just one or two per thing, some characters from some of my fave shows/movies: el hopper, jim hopper, ben wyatt, alex karev, jake peralta, elle woods, richie tozier, lewis robinson, meredith grey, chandler bing, jim halpert, madeline mackenzie, camille preaker, rosa diaz

Number of blankets you sleep with: i have one rlly big purple quilt ive been sleeping with forever

Dream trip: backpacking through europe with some friends or my sister (my sister travels a lot and she occasionally brings me places with her)

blog created: i made my FIRST tumblr back in 2012 i believe? and then i made my current main blog around 3 years ago? and i dont know the exact date but i believe im approaching the 2 year anniversary of this side blog any day now. i was in the fandom v shortly after the show released but primarily from my main blog and old side blog, then i made this one for solely st stuff in the beginning of september 2016

# of followers: i dont like to post follower count for a lot of reasons (ppl with less get envious, ppl with more get rude, and i dont like to focus on follower count to begin with and posting it makes me start to obsess) but if this was youtube i could be making a living off this jsdflkajf

Random fact: my favorite drink my whole life has been milk and im currently trying to cut out dairy so that’s smth tiny ive been struggling with lately djksafhl

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topweeklyupdate · 6 years ago

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TØP Weekly Update #54: COVER ME (7/13/2018)

Finally, after months of solid drought, the barren wasteland known as the TØP fanbase has finally been blessed with rain. And not just a gentle sprinkle; it’s been a consistent heavy downpour, a veritable flood. Even before new music, this week gave us new content from the group every single day. There will probably be something new out by the time you’re done reading this. So let’s not waste any time! Here’s your week in Twenty One Pilots news.

This Week’s TØPics:

Your Band Is Back: Trench Coming This October

“Jumpsuit” and “Nico” Released

New Logo/Theming/Everything

Josh Speaks

And SO. MUCH. MORE.

Major News and Announcements:

This time last week, I was certain that we would be getting new music on the 6th because it was my birthday. Turns out, myself and many others in the Clique read a little too deeply into Clancy’s promise that “everything would be different” by morning. We did not receive new music on that date, which, for the record, was way earlier than most reports had pegged. The fanbase wanted music ASAP and interpreted the letter to fit that, and anyone who said the band lied about when music was coming was just not being honest with themselves.

Things were different starting last Friday. On the one-year anniversary of their departure, Twenty One Pilots directly reached out to their fans for the first time, not through the wide platform of social media, but with an email message to their mailing list.

The message only consisted of the subject line “ARE YOU STILL SLEEPING?” and a gif of an opening yellow eye, with images fitting the iconography of the Dema site flashing under the eyelid. The Clique basically lost their minds at this direct contact, so much so that major publications like Billboard finally started to report on the long gestating speculation. Everyone was excited to see the eye open over the course of the day, bringing everything full circle and culminating (presumably) with new music.

That... didn’t happen. Rather, dmaorg.info was restored after being down for only a few hours, and this gif of torches was added onto the site. This indicated that Clancy had escaped Dema, and the Clique promptly set about assuming that the next day would mark the band’s full return. Further, the name of the gif, “they_ca_ntseeFCE300″, seemed to confirm what people would be speculating ever since Josh dyed his hair nearly two years ago: the next era’s color would be yellow (specifically, FCE300) to symbolize hope and light pushing back against the dark.

The next day brought with it another update from Clancy (and the general concession among the Clique to stop expecting new music every night and just go to bed). In one of my favorite bits of attention to detail so far, Clancy’s latest journal was messily handwritten on a scrap of paper, due to the fact that he had successfully escaped Dema and was now traveling through- big shock- a region called “Trench”. The writing itself is kinda rambly and generic (so I can relate), with Tyler Clancy marveling at how much he loves being in the trees being alone out in nature. That said, I do love that there is a definite story being presented, with Clancy experiencing changes, taking action, and going on a real journey through this world that Tyler’s created.

On the back of the paper, however, is something much more interesting: a blown-out image that, when reversed, revealed a dead body. That was creepy enough as is; far more creepy was the Clique’s CSI-level discovery that this ripped photo fit with several other dmaorg.info images in a giant puzzle. Who was this man? Was this a random poster that Clancy grabbed as he escaped, or are we supposed to take it as a metaphor? Was it a random citizen of Dema? A bishop? Clancy himself? Blurryface? So many questions.

Twenty One Pilots truly made their mainstream return on July 9th, when they posted a second video of a half-opened eye, not just for hardcore fans, but on all of their social media platforms. This return was accompanied by a total overhaul of the band’s general branding: a new yellow-and-black ||-// logo was revealed for the new era, while the old “silence” banners and even the website subscription box were covered up by bright yellow tape. Billboards featuring the logo on this yellow tape aesthetic sprang up in cities all around the world, from London to Toronto, Berlin to Melbourne, even an entire building in São Paolo. The boys were back.

On Tuesday, Twenty One Pilots again returned to social media to post a second video. The eye, now about 3/4 open, depicted even more of this medieval battle, now with the addition of the Watchers on the cliff throwing... something (rocks? rose petals?) into the air. Instead of generic white noise, this clip was scored by a muffled but still obviously crunchy bass line. As radio stations across the country began to tweet about a major alternative release coming Wednesday morning (with a few even mentioning they were from Columbus), we finally knew that we were going to be ok....

New Releases:

And then I was not okay.

Early Wednesday morning, Twenty One Pilots dropped two singles and announced the names and dates for the next album, Trench, and tour, Bandito. My prediction from last week was 100% correct, and you all may thank and validate me in the comments below like and subscribe. “Jumpsuit” is our main single with a full cinematic music video, while “Nico and the Niners” is the more lore-heavy low-key song for the fans. I’m going to pull back from fully going in on picking apart every sonic and thematic element of both songs and save that for (hopefully) a less busy week, but you know I gotta write about their first new music in two years. Cause that’s what I do: I write too much.

Guys, “Jumpsuit” is a straight-up banger. Featuring a killer driving bassline, some of Tyler’s most impassioned screams, and a truly devastating bridge, I have not tired of this song one bit in the last few days. It takes me on a complete emotional journey in just four minutes every time, and it does so mainly through its soundscape (there’s only the hook, three couplet verses, and that damn bridge). It’s so, so, so, so good, potentially (dare I say it) the best sonically arranged and produced song the band has ever released.

So... what’s “Jumpsuit” about? Well, a lot of things, but in a word: pressure. Again, the lyrics are super vague, I think deliberately so. Clearly the song is about the singer feeling pressured by others into taking a path that he does not want to travel down. That bridge, delivered in an eerie detached falsetto, shows Tyler pushing back even at his weakest point, stating that he will not submit to what others want him to do unless they “grab him by the throat, tie him down, and break his hands.” Certainly you can argue that this is about the music industry. The “breaking his hands” line is killer in that context, as it signifies that the industry can’t control him without taking away the things that makes him valuable to them in the first place, his artistic ability and freedom. You can also say that it’s just playing straight into the concept, with Clancy breaking away from the bishops’ control. But the deliberate vagueness of the lyrics means that the audience can apply the message- and the empowerment of that killer bassline- to whatever struggle they are facing. That’s pretty darn rad.

The music video, directed by “Heathens” and “Heavydirtysoul”’s Andrew Donoho, is sick. Tyler (looking extra fly in his new yellow hooded jumpsuit) attempts to flee from this creepy Red Riding Hood old dude on a white horse (Nico?) through what is certainly a Game of Thrones filming location while other figures in yellow duct tape jumpsuits look on from the cliffs above. Tyler is captured by the bishop, who “smears” him by putting the black Blurryface makeup on his neck. Tyler is freed briefly from the bishop’s control when the other yellow-clad figures throw yellow petals down on him, but he is chased down knocked out or killed. The others flee the scene, save for one very handsome looking drummer boy... Oh, and there’s a bunch of intercut clips of Tyler on the car from “Heavydirtysoul” for some reason.

Besides those “Heavydirtysoul” scenes, which truthfully don’t connect much to the story of the video beyond artificially welding it onto the end of the Blurryface Era, this is one of the band’s best videos yet. It totally fulfilled all of my expectations of a more epic scope for this era, from the gorgeous Iceland setting to the dope as hell costumes to the implication that the story might continue on from this point. And there are tons of little Easter eggs, from brief flashes of the nine bishops to possible cameos from the Josephs and Duns. We don’t really know for sure if Tyler is playing Clancy or if the red dude is Nico, but it will certainly be fun to continue to fill in the blanks as we move forward and (hopefully) hear more from Tyler directly.

“Nico and the Niners” is a weird track, but one that I still absolutely love. In some ways, it’s a more traditional tøp track, with some of the raggae elements found on Blurryface and a rap verse to fit all of Tyler’s lyrics in. But in other significant ways, it’s a totally different path for them. For starters, just look at that title: it’s very explicitly about this album’s concept from top to bottom, with Tyler singing about fleeing Dema and its bishops’ control and even heavily referencing “Jumpsuit”; there’s clearly going to be a great deal of thematic cohesion in this project. But there’s also just the general vibe of it: just as “Jumpsuit” was a heavier rock song than anything we’d yet seen from the band, "Nico” is way more laid back, its repeated references to being high and even its visualizer of assorted shrubbery making it a potential stoner anthem (whether that was Tyler’s intention or not). Regardless, the song is brimming with character and hooks, and it’s already grown on me significantly in just a few days.

Oh, and one more thing: this song lives up to its Dema-referencing title and content by being cryptic af. The track is littered with reversed audio in the instrumental bits, including the “we are banditos” snippet from dmaorg.info and another sample of someone who sounds a lot like Josh saying “We will leave Dema at true east, renounce Vialism [the bishops’ ruling philosophy, alluded to be Clancy in an earlier journal].” I swear, if all it takes for Tyler to make all this stuff is a year break, he should do this after every album.

With all that new music, the fact that we finally have a name for Album 5 almost got lost in the shuffle. Trench was a popular guess over the last few days thanks to dmaorg.info, but it’s good to finally know for sure. Graphic designer Brandon Rike from the Blurryface Era is back again, revealing a cover featuring a badass-looking vulture/falcon/whatever, some new logos (including the return of FPE!), and some more yellow tape that appears to be covering the names of the rest of the album’s songs. Not too much else to say at this point; we’ll just have to wait until some of that tape gets peeled off between now and October 5th.

Finally, let’s talk about the Bandito Tour. It bears mentioning that, amidst the otherwise overwhelmingly positive positive atmosphere of the band’s return, this tour name received the most general opposition from fans and non-fans alike. The fact that “bandito” was probably going to turn up in a lyric from two decidedly white dudes was already enough to put some folks on edge, but the idea of an entire tour of predominantly non-Hispanic tweens flooding arenas and calling themselves banditos was enough to turn a few people against the band. And look, I get it- I hear “bandito” and the first things I think of are John Wayne Westerns and Speedy Gonzalez, and I get why a lot of fans might feel uncomfortable with that. But, to be fair, the band hasn’t used any of those stereotypes and banditos is a word for outlaw used in a number of Romance languages. Perhaps most interestingly, there’s not yet any evidence that the word even appears in the album itself. So far, the only appearance of “bandito” is in a coded message on dmaorg.info and in reversed audio in “Nico”. If this does turn out to be a name meant to only make sense to the most hardcore of fans, it is almost redeemed (I mean, I still think the name is a little silly, but I’m already in presale).

So, with that out of the way, let’s actually talk about the tour itself. It will be an international arena tour- even if the band’s sound is not going in a pop direction, they still clearly feel confident that the Clique will show up wherever they go. The first show will be hosted in Nashville (their first arena concert in that market) on October 16, not even two weeks after the release of the full album. What a baller move, and much preferred to the Blurryface rollout where we didn’t hear most of the songs on the record until nearly two months after the album release and they didn’t play near me for even longer. The boys will tour the U.S. until November 21, even playing arenas in a few markets that they’ve never played large venues in before, and then hit up Australia and New Zealand in December.

The most objectively interesting leg will be in Europe from January through March. Not only will the band play their first arena shows in markets like Moscow, Oslo, Stockholm, Copenhagen, Central Poland, and Manchester, they will return to markets like Dublin and Glasgow they’ve been absent from for years. Most exciting, Twenty One Pilots will play their first shows in Bologna and Stuttgart and venture into the countries of Ukraine, Switzerland, Spain, and Portugal for the first time ever. Needless to say, the rabid fanbases of all of these regions are super excited, and I’m super excited for them!

Other Shenanigans:

While Tyler has continued to stay silent (much as he has since mid-Blurryface Era), Josh immediately jumped back on Twitter with a standard Josh joke and even resumed his morning workout Snapchats. On Thursday, Josh even called into BBC Radio One with Annie Mac to give a quick interview about the new era. He didn’t provide a ton of information, but it was just a delight to hear our kid’s voice again. A few tidbits of info:

Josh reported that he was calling from Trench, I hate him.

The sick bass riff on “Jumpsuit” was born from soundchecks toward the end of Emotional Roadshow. He says that, as a result, it sounds closest to the Blurryface sound, serving as a good transition into the new era. (If this is what he thinks is close to Blurryface on Trench, this album’s gonna be nutter butters.)

Both Josh and Tyler are really nervous about the elaborate rollout, both out of the usual fear that no one stuck around and out of wariness of severely disappointing people when they hear the actual music (so far, so good...)

Trench continues to have the “diverse” sound of the previous records and also was designed to be played live.

Josh also tuned into Apple Music’s Beats 1 for an interview with Hanuman Welch. This conversation was less about the new album and more about the “hiatus”. More tidbits:

The band views collaboration as a “sacred” thing, and while they’re not against it in the future, it has to be done in a context that makes sense and not merely for marketing purposes.

The band has never used the word hiatus because they’ve been working. They drew back from the spotlight to allow themselves some time to recharge, but also because they were worried of oversaturation (particularly after the Grammys pushed them into that next-level pop culture sphere). Rather than make a bunch of social media posts that didn’t mean anything just to stay relevant, the band decided to draw back, focus on music, and in the process “thin the weeds” of fans who weren’t the diehards.

For the last few albums, the music has come from a specific personal place the band was at while write, whether it be a spiritual journey with Vessel or tackling insecurities on Blurryface. Josh says the same remains true with Trench, but notes that there will be a little more fleshing out themes by working on a specific story with this one (he still says it’s not really a concept album, but ok).

Believe it or not, we are not done. While the boys were blazing a brave new path forward, another bit of content reminded us of where the band came from. Greg Wells, the producer who made Vessel the masterpiece it was, gave an hour-long interview to Billboard’s Pop Shop Podcast. He mainly speaks about getting started in the industry back in the 90s and working on the mega-blockbuster Greatest Showman soundtrack, but he does talk about Vessel for a bit approximately forty minutes into the interview. I won’t give the exact time-code, not because I’m lazy, but because the entire interview is worth listening to. Greg just seems like a rad dude. His laid-back nature and the seriousness he takes with his craft really shine through; he and Tyler must have gotten along just fine.

Community Spotlight:

The Clique took some heavy losses over the last year, as a great deal of old fans moved on to greener pastures. But that just left room for a whole host of new fans to rise to the occasion and help us get through that long drought. Today, I wanted to give a shout-out to GingerSheep and Stolen Potential, two Clique vloggers that have really kept the fanbase informed and uplifted and have been working their butts off reporting on the daily content. I know how long it takes me just to research and write one of these- I can’t imagine the work that then goes into filming and editing on top of that nearly every day. Hats off to you, good sirs. Make sure you all check out their channels if you haven’t already! But, you know, don’t stop reading these. I have bills to pay with all the Tumblr money I’m not making.

Well, that wasn’t too much, was it? If you made it all the way to the end, mad props. See you next week for a slightly tamer week (probably).

Power to the local dreamer.

|-/

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pkmnjesus · 7 years ago

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P J’s PokéAni Rewind 2017

It’s time for my 2nd annual year-end Tumblr tradition! If you haven’t seen last year’s post, check out my 2016 PokéAni highlights which mostly featured XY&Z‘s run. This year I decided to change the name to “rewind” instead of highlights because I really want to go over with what happened this year :D Also, I just wanted to say Happy New Year to all my followers, and the rest of the Pokémon tumblr community! I remember saying that 2016 was the best year for my blog, but this year of 2017 COMPLETELY surpasses it due to the GIFs I’ve contributed to the fandom that started some time in the spring. The final episode of the year aired a few days ago, and PokéAni has officially wrapped up for this year. With Pokémon anime celebrating their 20th anniversary this year, as well as their 1,000th episode milestone, (this post will be following the original Japanese release dates) let’s a take a look back at some of my personal favorite moments that the Sun & Moon series had to offer in 2017:

JANUARY - Ash’s first Grand Trial

After clearing his first trial against the Totem Gumshoos in Verdant Cavern, Ash gets his taste of Kahuna Hala’s strength in his first grand trial. This was definitely the first hyped battle I was looking forward to when Sun & Moon first started, and it really ended with a bang when Ash performed the Z-Move, Breakneck Blitz, for the first time ever! Clearing the trial gave Ash an Electrium Z, in which Tapu Koko specifically wanted him to receive. Seeing Crabrawler battle for the first time was wicked too!

FEBRUARY - Shiron/Snowy is born!

The Pokémon egg that Lillie raised and took care of finally hatched into an adorable little Alolan Vulpix! It eventually became Lillie’s first and only Pokémon, and showcases how much she cares and loves Snowy when she was protecting it from Team Rocket. Although she still couldn’t touch other Pokémon (at the time), this was her first big break from overcoming her fear of touching Pokémon. SHIRON IS ADORBS ^o^

MARCH - Tasty Determination

When Ash and his classmates came over to Mallow’s family restaurant to try out a tasty meal, Mallow and Bounsweet are fired up to cook the best Alolan stew they can possibly make! A specific ingredient, the Yellow Nectar from an Oricorio, was needed to make that happen. During Ash and Mallow’s hunt to find the nectar, Team Rocket butts in their business. Thanks Bounsweet evolving into Steenee, not only were they able to find the Yellow Nectar needed, but also took care of Team Rocket. In the end, Mallow’s Alolan stew recipe was loved by all, and she felt accomplished! Wish I could have tasted it myself...Steenee may have evolved but it is still a sweet Pokémon to me <3

APRIL - Stoutland’s end is Litten’s new beginning

In possibly one of the most depressing and emotional episodes the Pokémon anime has to offer, the wild Litten that always stole Ash’s food finally gets to be apart of his team. Ash tried to help the loyal Stoutland Litten was living with, but due to Stoutland’s old age and declining health, there wasn’t much the Pokémon Center could do. It wasn’t directly shown, nor mentioned, but it is clear to me that the Stoudland has passed away. *sobs* The gloomy rainy weather shown during the episode signifies the sadness and mourning every character that was involved during Litten’s struggle to find help for this good ol’ friend. Eventually the rain stopped, and a rainbow bloomed in a distance that made Litten feel better remembering the good memories he had with Stoutland. When Litten decides to join Ash’s team after battling with Pikachu, the memories learning and training with Stoutland are never forgotten, as Litten embarks on a new journey with brand new friends and a caring trainer. ;_;

MAY - The boy we’ve all been waiting for...

Ah yes, the most anticipated Sun & Moon appearance since it’s inception (besides Hau…who has yet to appear :\), Lillie’s onii-sama, Gladion! Ash was really determined to battle this powerful trainer in town when he first heard of him. Gladion initially had no interest wasting his time with him until he noticed Ash’s Z-Ring and his encounters with Tapu Koko. The two finally decide to battle the next morning, and although it was interrupted by Team Rocket, I was really happy to see one of my favorite Gen. 7 Pokémon, Lycanroc [Midnight form] in action especially with that Continental Crush Z-move! Let’s not forget about his Umbreon that wrecked the Team Skull trio earlier, and his Type: Null that shows up in the anime later on…Ash has a new rival has ARRIVED #StillGay4Gladion

JUNE - Olivia loves everything

Welcome to Akala Island! Meet the island’s Kahuna, Olivia who will be the host for Kukui’s class on their field trip all over the place. Olivia is shown to be a very outgoing, but sometimes clumsy, lovable person. She loves every Pokémon she sees, and they love her back even if it comes to bite her back (bites are like kisses to her lol). She even calmed an angry Tauros herd when it nearly stampeded everyone! Not to mention her huge assist on helping trapped Wailmer underwater by an angry Bruxish. As Ash & friends go on an expedition around Akala island, many challenges and exciting adventures await them that will eventually lead to one final showdown with Kahuna Olivia herself. Ladies & gentlemen, let the Akala trials begin!

JULY - A Z-Crystal for Lana

During the trial at Brooklet Hill, Ash & Lana’s fishing trip turned into an intense battle with a Totem Wishiwashi. Despite its enormous power, Lana stayed focused with the task at hand defeating Wishwashi. It was because of Popplio they were able to overcome the Totem Pokémon, and it even learned Aqua Jet in the process! Also as a result, the a school of Wishiwashi rewarded Lana with a Water-type Z-Crystal (Waterium Z) to use with the new Z-Ring she received from Kahuna Olivia out of the Sparkling Stone she found previously. Way to go Lana! This is why Popplio lovers, such as myself, ROCK! ...or WATER!?

AUGUST - Enter Dusk Doggo

With Pokémon Ultra Sun and Pokémon Ultra Moon’s release in the distance at the time, the anime managed to promote something on their end to hype up the new and exclusive features it has to offer. After a sweet victory in Ash’s Akala grand trial against Kahuna Olivia, Rockruff’s rowdy behavior showed us signs that it wants to evolve into something stronger. Will it evolve to Midday form or Midnight form? NEITHER! With the help of Tape Lele, Olivia’s Lycanroc, and Gladion’s Lycanroc, Ash’s Rockruff evolved into a form no one in the world has seen before (both their fictional and our real world) with bright green eyes! Behold, Dusk form Lycanroc is officially revealed. Guess Ash got an early copy of the new games, I guess? Welcome to the team, Dusk Doggo :3

SEPTEMBER - Are we in 1997 again?

What’s a 20th anniversary celebration without brining back some old familiar faces that made this show iconic? When I first heard about Brock & Misty coming back, I THOUGHT IT WAS A FANMADE POST on the internet…but alas, I was wrong and immediately got filled with hype and refueled my nostalgia tank to the max. Professor Kukui deicides to take the class to a field trip in the Kanto region! When they finally arrived at the airport, reunions and introductions were in the air as Alolan air meets Kanto grounds. Many easter eggs and past references were shown throughout the episode for fans like me who have grew up with the original series, especially since they first went to Professor Oak’s lab. One of my favorite parts of the episode is when Kiawe tries to put a blonde wig on the Kanto Dugtrio LOL! Team Rocket tried to join into the nostalgia party, but was short lived thanks to their Bewear friend. We later on get to see epic battles at the brand new Cerulean Gym with a few surprises that Brock & Misty have up their sleeve. If you’ve seen the battles, you know I mean. As a fan who grew up with this show since the very start in the late 90s, (I hate to be nostalgia-biased BUT) this was absolutely the best moment in 2017 for me. Some would complain why it was only 2 episodes, but y’all need to understand that this was meant to be special, and a celebration of what the anime has accomplished in its 20 year run. There was reason why Brock & Misty weren’t wearing their updated attires, to call back fans who haven’t watched this anime in a long time, at the same time promoting the awesome Sun & Moon series with Ash’s Alolan friends. Watching the Kanto specials was an absolute blast. I got this feeling, the feeling of pure awesomeness and seeing my childhood come back to life for a short time in today’s modern high definition standards. This was the same feeling I got with Yu-Gi-Oh!: The Dark Side of Dimensions when it was announced in 2016, and Digimon Adventure tri. in 2015…only no one has really aged in the Ash’s universe, but that’s fine! Every show is unique in their own way <3 I’m still a bit bummed we didn’t get to see my boy Tracey freakin’ Sketchit C’MON WRITERS WHY

OCTOBER - Noisy Nebby

The Nebby saga begins! In one probably the biggest main storyline from the games, the Aether Foundation (MOMMY LUSAMINE IS HERE BABY!…and Burnet! Wifey Burnet is here too <3) and Ultra Beasts finally made their presence in the anime. When Ash found a wild Cosmog in the forest one day, the whole class befriends the little Pokémon, in which Lillie names it Nebby, or Hoshigumo-chan in the original Japanese version. Everyone loves Nebby, but it does make quite the noise when it cries. The funniest part is when Nebby teleports people randomly to places they don’t want to be in! Like teleporting you and your classmates on top of a roof xD Don’t worry, we all still love and care for the little critter, but little did Ash & friends know initially that the Pokémon held enormous power that could travel though Ultra Space.

NOVEMBER - The not so FABAulous Aether guy

On the heels of the 1,000th episode, where we saw Gladion's Type: Null become a Silvally, and Lillie overcoming her fear of Pokémon after revisiting haunting memories, Faba of the Aether Foundation manages to kidnap Nebby. He wanted to use its power this in order to bring forth UB-01 Symbiont (Nihilego) via Ultra Wormhole. We already saw how evil and grimy Faba was when he ever since he was introduced (although, let’s be honest…for those who played the games we already knew he was going to be a jerk), but I never thought the anime would make him this hateful. Doesn’t like kids, throws Rowlet, grabs Lillie forcefully, power hungry and even abuses Nebby. He’s one of those characters that I love to hate (so I don’t really hate him? his character role is great basically), but hey at least he tried to apologize later on when he realized he screwed up. The positives from all of this was that he got tackled by Ash, got smacked smacked in the face by an Ultra Beast LOL, and that Nebby was able to evolve into a Cosmoem. Faba definitely deserves my spotlight for November! Unfortunately, the Nihilego that he summoned takes a smitten Lusamine with it to Ultra Space…how is this man not getting fired from the Foundation after doing all of this??? Or at the least getting demotion?

DECEMBER - Saving Mrs. Lusamine

Final Destination: Poni Island…Objective: Enter wormhole and rescue Lusamine! With the help of the 4 guardian deities of Alola that upgraded Ash’s ring Z-ring, along with obtaining Solgalium Z, a Z-Powered Lillie, her brother and the rest of her classmates climb onto Nebby’s back (now a Solgaleo) in order find her mother in deepest parts of Ultra Space. And HERE WE GO, Lusamine has fused with Nihilego that looks to be the ultimate mother beast! The epic battles begin as Kiawe, Lana, Mallow, and Sophocles lend their support to handle most of Lusamine’s powered-up Pokémon team. Meanwhile, Lillie, Gladion, and Ash try to fight their way through the area getting towards Lusamine in hopes of freeing her from Nihilego’s control. If Lillie can get through a Clefable’s feelings, she can definitely get through her mom’s! Thanks to Ash's epic assist when he used Pikashunium Z on Pikachu to perform the very powerful 10,000,000 Volt Thunderbolt, they were able to take down the mother beast and defuse Lusamine from Nihilego's clutches. Gladion and a crying Lillie are finally reunited with their loving mother, as everyone returns back to their own world where Professor Kukui & Burnet wait for their arrival. Eventually, Solgaleo returns to where it came from after dropping them off...all I can just say is that besides Lillie’s outstanding development from 1 year ago, it was bittersweet to bid farewell to Nebby even if it was just for 3 months :’) But hey, maybe we’ll see it again? Only time will tell…..but bravo Ash! Bravo Lillie! Bravo everyone in the Sun & Moon cast 👏 all of you did an amazing job in this arc!

Some honorable mentions...

2017 for PokéAni many other remarkable moments to take into account. We had new Pokémon caught added to the main cast such as James’s touchy Mareanie and Kiawe’s Alolan Marowak (in the episode where the infamous Hiker David makes his appearance xD) that seems to have a rivalry with Turtonator. We also got to see farm in his home, along with his family and adorable little sister Mimo/Hoshi! Kiawe’s personality overall has been fun to watch as he seems to be a very eccentric person. We pretty much got introduced to everyone of the main casts’ family during the episode where Delia Ketchum visits Ash in Alola. Other family matters like Sophocles thought he was moving a way for good, or Mallow’s daddy problems at the restaurant were fun little fillers that made us laugh and explore the characters’ personality a little better as the episode focuses on them. I found Sun & Moon’s fillers are really enjoyable for the most part! Whether if it’s a pancake race, a Charjabug race, wearing Alolan Dugtrio blonde wigs or a Palossand almost demolishing Kukui’s house, you can’t help but loving the characters even more and actually care for their development when they interact with each other. A personal favorite was when Rowlet, Litten, and Popplio had mini-adventure of their own, and outsmarted Team Rocket nasty schemes. Speaking of Team Rocket, we got a short glimpse of them versus a trio of Team Skull members last May, and I can’t wait to see what Team Skull brings to the table in 2018!

Kukui’s class activities like the baseball teams, camping outdoors, switching Pokémon partners with fellow classmates for the weekend, and sleeping over at the professor’s house were awesome too! Their field trip seeing the beautiful white Aether Paradise, and traveling through the mysterious Ultra Space were treat as well. We got to see the development of Kukui and Burnet’s pre-married relationship, which wasn’t featured in the games…AND WE GOT A PROPOSAL AND WEDDING OUT OF IT! Ash’s new Alolan parents are great togehter <3 Just call them dad and mom already xD

Important highlights I would like to mention briefly is Rockruff’s/Lycanroc’s development from this cute little puppy to being a raging mad dog that Ash can’t control when it wants to get stronger, especially during the battle against Gladion’s Type: Null. And how get I forget the legendary Jigglypuff of Kanto making its visit to Alola? I hope we do get to see more of this sensational singer next year, but after the encounter with Principal Oak’s Komala, I would be satisfied with making that episode Jigglypuff’s final appearance :’D At least it had proper closure compared to when it just disappeared all of a sudden in Hoenn. Futhermore, Bewear continues to HUG-in Team Rocket’s plans, Samson Oak is still the best Poké-imitator since Pikachu, Rotom Dex is still very addicted to Detective Laki, and Ash’s Z-Crystal collection keeps growing bigger. It’s really cool to see him do his usual victory pose like what he did with gym badges in the past. That’s what’s so great about this series compared to the past because everything about Sun & Moon is very different (same goes for the games)! There’s a reason for the animation change, and to be honest I’m happy that they did! The art style definitely fits the tone and theme of the jolly Alola region. In conclusion, should you watch the Sun & Moon series after over 365 days since its premiere in 2016? As someone who has watched it,

...the answer is: YES! YEP! AND DEFINITELY!

Welp there you have it! I don’t want to make this post as long as it already is. I’m sure there are some moments that I didn’t mention here since this is my own personal list, so feel free share your own favorite PokéAni moment 2017 with a reblog or a reply if you want! Thanks again for an amazing year, and it’s time for 2018 to get rolling (Alolan League or Team Skull arc pls?)…the moments are waiting! I’m still in a bit of a hiatus (referring to my personal post before this), but I knew I had to this post out before the year ends.

See you guys soon ;D

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